#trying not to be destructive over it lol but yikes

[mandalhoerian]

Death Before Dishonor | 0

Pairing: darth vader x reader, anakin skywalker x reader

Notes: fem!reader, mandalorian!reader, gif used isn't mine!

Summary: You have become the young war hero Anakin Skywalker's right hand in his pursuit to reunite the galaxy in Emperor Palpatine's reign. It's the rumored aftermath of the war between dark and light, but you are a Mandalorian, Jedi and Sith don't mean anything to you, in fact, they are the same existence that led to the destruction of your planet a millennia ago. Their war is something you don't care to know about, you're aware you won't understand anyway, there is a lot you're told to keep your nose out of as just a soldier to obey commands.

One of those things is the distinction between Darth Vader and Anakin Skywalker; you weren't told why they must be addressed as two separate beings. Who he is really and who he appears as to the HoloNet confuse you endlessly when they are the same in your mind: both look at you in secret mourning.

You can't afford to find out why.

Warning(s): mentions of death and description of a decapitated head lol

Author's Note: death before dishonor was first published as an OC story on wattpad (shhhh carry on)! it has A LOT of plot packed into it and we start out in the post!rots empire. you'll slowly figure out who you are in this story and how you fit into everything and ~what happened to you~ as the story progresses and surprise! vader didn't burn! mysterious, huh? hehe, you're in for a ride!

I apologize bc i'm not a native speaker of English but regardless, I hope you enjoy this journey and like the story! this is a short prologue yikes

prologue | 1

"YOU HAVE AN ENTIRE SQUAD OF FORCE-SENSITIVE JEDI HUNTERS UNDER YOUR COMMAND, INQUISITOR." Lord Vader's face appears to be expressionless, but the sharp lines circling his eyes keep deepening in distaste as impatient seconds chase each other, carrying the choking question of whether the inquisitor is going to die today to create an example or not. "Need I remind you they were once Jedi themselves. Considering your abilities didn't disappear overnight, I expect results."

The Inquisitor's already uneasy heart, despite his training having shaped him into an impenetrable fortress, trembles under the life-threatening presence of this young man, he almost loses control and the fear crawling out of the depths of his stomach almost takes over him. He needs to remain professional before this thing who can sniff out even the tiniest of heart shivers.

He keeps reminding himself that he is not what he was before as he opens his dry, sticky mouth. "My lord, we've gotten some profound information—"

"I do not care for information, I want those treacherous Jedi dead. Are you capable of understanding me?"

Anger, fresh and smoking, slithers through the corners of the door to his mind, nudging him to make the brothers and sisters pay for his trampled pride. He's paying for their failure, after all - he has nothing to do with this. It's not fair. Feverish and piping resentment penetrates his veins and diffuses into his blood. "Yes, Lord Vader."

Even if the Sith Lord senses what the man is radiating like a beacon, he doesn't comment on it, and that is to remind him of his place: The inquisitor's anger is nothing more than a bug trying to rebel against him. "You were given one job and one job only, and if you prove to be inadequate at it, there is no reason for you to exist, no?"

Grand Inquisitor is now under the pressure of two blazing, furious stars glaring down at him——twin suns, just hiding behind the ugly, yellow eyes belonging to the poster boy of the Galactic Empire criticizing him.

The man he was in the worst of times would pat the shoulder of his clone subordinates and give an understanding, yet encouraging smile, and would say, "Next time we will get them. Keep your head up, soldier." Easygoing but charismatic at the same time. That's who he used to be within an Order of stuck-up bigots.

He resembles a Jedi more as Darth Vader, Grand Inquisitor thinks, in a twisted, extreme way.

The Emperor's right hand is absolutely insatiable, never really satisfied with anything, chillingly similar to the behavior of an eternally hungry black hole, a silent death tramping through the universe and swallowing anything on its way. In his short reign as Darth Vader, he's made history. Nothing could have picked up the galaxy the way he did in the Emperor's name. Nothing.

If this man wasn't held back by a leash, how long would it take for the galaxy to be swallowed down by him?

Grand Inquisitor is back in the moment with a tilt of Lord Vader's head. It was a minefield he was treading on, he didn't know what could tick him off, other than failure that is. Which those idiots already are shameful of. "We will not fail next time Lord Vader, they will not escape us again."

"How many nexts has it been now, I wonder," is the answer he gets, yet the agitated sentence gets less irate towards the end, Vader suddenly getting distracted by something that is not in the bleak and chilled assembly room of the starship.

Soon enough, the mechanical door slides to the left and reveals a Mandalorian inquisitor escorted by two clone troopers belonging to the 501st legion.

Grand Inquisitor's spine unconsciously strengthens in reflex, like he's in the close proximity of a predator, and forces him to stand straighter, taller, bigger, oddly akin to what a prey animal would do, but no matter how much he tries to appear stronger than this particular co-worker, the inevasible truth shows itself even in what she's holding at the moment, a portable freezer containing the head of a wanted Jedi, her trademark.

Her unexpected visit to Marauder is direct defiance to him and his strict orders, yet she stands there like a star hunter glowing with the halcyon remains of her victim, chin high and chest puffed out.

She's there to get the point across with her actions rather than words, and that's exactly what tears into Grand Inquisitor's monster of a bruised ego, twisting his view of the world; now in his eyes, her matte black Mandalorian-type Inquisitorius helmet, with garish red eye-lens strips mirrors cockiness, especially when contrasting the situation he is in at the moment.

Ignoring Grand Inquisitor altogether, "I've captured them all, my lord," she announces, a ringing, clear voice, noised with mechanical static of the helmet, cutting off into the vastly dire conversation between him and his Lord Vader, having halted the latter's growing displeased disposition with the operation not going as expected.

He simply stands there, suddenly the bleak, naked iron walls of the room with little to no furniture except a round table surrounded by uncomfortable little chairs feeling closer and closer, and the unnatural, white lighting from fluorescent lights he didn't pay any mind hurting his eyes. "Captured them all?"

Darth Vader is silent as an invisible ambush ship, his eyes glued to the case she's carrying in her gloved hand.

"Force-sensitive children are being transported to the cells." She goes on with her report as she sets the freezer on the table, and pushes on the buttons to open the lid to show the gory contents of it. "This particular Jedi had been on a spree to collect them. Didn't want to surrender to the empire. Suffered the consequences."

As the Jedi's severed ashen head is revealed to them followed by a hissing sound, slowly taking shape after the thick frictionless icy mist oozing out from the container case thins out, Grand Inquisitor takes note of how much of a clean-cut it was that took his life, such unexpected, thunderous agility she must have possessed to freeze the exact traumatized aghast expression on his face.

For a moment, it is the head of a mannequin rather than an actual sliced member of a human being's body; there is no blood, no actual sign of a struggle, the face looks artificially carved.

This is the quality of her work. Mandalorian Inquisitor operates on a different tier because of this reason: She gets things done.

"What about the other Jedi?" is Vader's question, straight to the point as always.

Mandalorian doesn't even skip a beat in answering. "He was alone with the children, I ambushed him that way in hyperspace. They think he's alive, I've recorded a holomessage of him calling for help and sampled his voice if be needed later on. We can also lure them in that way."

Grand Inquisitor, feeling farther from his title with every word leaving Vader's underling, sees his destruction in her victory, hears the quiet whispers of eventual death calling to him from her greedy, ever-expanding shadow, they tell him and his inquisitors to step up, or they'll be reduced to unnamed, nameless speckles of dust scattered from a red blade's strike. "Perhaps we could have used the Jedi."

"I am." Her retortion, needlelike in lack of respect for the head inquisitor, blows up in his face like a blaster shot, and he feels burning heat throbbing in his temples.

Vader doesn't take his words into consideration. His steely Force-touch stabs into Grand Inquisitor's signature, making him bow down with even the smallest gesture of disapproval. "That's enough, the incapable should learn from the wise."

The wise, he bites back in his head, the Mandalorian girl was just a shell of a soulless being when they had brought her to be trained in the ways of the Dark Side.

It was if a sun had died and left behind a graveyard of unrecognizable remains. The black hole of its former self were hiding in her eyes, pools of ink, devouring any touch of light in their intensity; a miserable veil of a starless, sunless planet's darkest night skies, emptier than a freshly slain star not being able to recognize itself in the mirrors of universe staring back at it. Her Mandalorian brethren would laugh in the face of that pathetic display.

If it wasn't for Lord Vader igniting the spark of a whole cosmos in her hollow rib cage, she would be rotting in dusty corners of the dysfunctional Imperial Senate, invisible shackles would keep weighing her down to rock bottom.

Yet, she is wiser than him? He is supposed to follow her lead, his inferior who had pulled this disrespectful flex of power just to vex the esteemed leader of Inquisitorius?

Sticky green envy chips away at his suppressed fury while he clenches his teeth and accepts what his lord commands.

She watches him like a shriekhawk behind her helmet, and he can't sense what she is feeling or thinking at all.

If it's because he needs more training or she's just an insentient kind of a supreme life form with no will of her own and just exists to serve Vader, he does not know.

#anakin skywalker x reader #darth vader x reader #anakin skywalker x you #darth vader x you #suitless vader x reader #star wars x reader #shai talks: my first post on tumblr #story: death before dishonor #anakin x reader #anakin fanfiction #shai's writings

[meowmeow422]

YOU

I see you like the warriors of hope from danganronpa

Any hcs you can share?

Finally! /hj

Quite a few, tho they may not be the best lol😅

Also, influenced by my 'Princess of Light' AU—basically a universe where Monaca met Makoto instead and was inpired by him.

Oh, and the rest of the Warriors are yanderes cause why not?

If anyone wanna check it out, here! I have some hcs that are specific for that au as well—if anyone is interested, I can post those too.

Anywho, hcs. Tw: angst, dark stuff. I'll add some silly fluff ones at the end so just scroll there if you wanna avoid the heavier drabbles

Monaca Towa

I have a feeling that Monaca is a bit like Cruella and/ or Himiko Toga. She already had some questionable tendencies that only worsen with the way she was treated; she just needed some help but we know how that ended up

Monaca def has a sibling complex. I think she always just wanted a family. No matter what, it's a fact: she was just a kid; a half-sibling was still a sibling to her, yet Haiji was absolutely disgusted by her very existence. (As someone with two older siblings I can't even imagine the pain)

I mean, just look at her wiki. The way it describes what others, what Haiji thought if her? Her own quotes? Yikes

Which is probably why she was so quickly and obsessively attached with Junko; the person who could be her sister—her family

Wanna know the 'best part'? It is canon that she knew perfectly well that Junko not only didn't actually care for them but was using them too. Ouch

Nagisa Shingetsu

Due to what his parents put him through, he abhors games where you have to grind or constantly level up.

He does however love cute casual/ mindless stuff; games where you can just turn off your brain and enjoy yourself—games where you don't need to be perfect, you can just be you

He is either completely terrified or utterly apathetic to needles. Like when the school nurse come to give the annual shot, he's either gonna break down or be like 'huh, another one.'

Pretty numb to sensations most of the time. Especially bad during exam week or if his parents have a new theory they wanna 'try out'

Kotoko Utsugi

Panics when men get into her personal space—espeacially fearful of the older/ bigger ones

Has dark tendencies too; it's unfair that she had to go through the abuse, so why not share the pain?

She'd tear some of the girls' skirt or top, or splash water onto them.

She wants other girls to be tainted so that she herself feels less dirty

When she used to act in school plays, she tried to spend as much time at rehearsals so that she didn't have to at her 'other job'

Probably has an eating disorder—mostly cause her mom keeps telling her she needs to be cute or else she is worthless

Jataro Kemuri

His obsession with hatred comes from the belief that while he is despised he is still paid attention too

Afterall, hate and love aren't opposites—they're paralells. Apathy is the true opposite

Jataro would pick being degraded and laughed at 1000× over being ignored

His worst experience was when his mom got so fed up that she didn't even get mad at him, just glared and walked away. A whole day of damning silence

Also, likely why he says random stuff; it confuses others and gives him their attention, if momentarily

Masaru Daimon

Due to his dad's addictions, Masaru flinches at the sight of a lighter

Additionally, he really hates strong smelling substances

He learnt how to patch himself and knew basic medical skills at a young age

As we've seen, he can also be self destructive; bruising himself when he feels like he's not living up to the title of 'Hero'

Lived off instant foods since his dad only gave him meager pocket change for it.

Now, onto the more light-hearted ones!

They like playing the Sims and/ or Minecraft together! Kotoko would design their characters and work with Jataro to build their house; Nagisa prefers playing free/ creative mode cause there's no goals or restrictions to abide; Masaru would likely be the only one hyped to finish certain milestones purely to brag; Monaca, well, she's gonna unleash all her pent up frustrations on those poor Sims/ mobs.

They used to have movie nights together! It was Kotoko's idea since it was an adorbs trend. Initially it was just the girls but eventually the guys joined too. They usually do it either at Monaca's place or very rarely at Jataro's.

They each have different love languages! Jataro's is physical touch, since he never recieved anything from his mother due to her disgust of him; Masaru's is words of affirmation as his dad never really said anything good about him and only talked when necessary; Kotoko's is quality time—since, prior to Monaca, people only interact/ spend time with her they have an ulterior motive; Nagisa's is acts of service—as he never had someone do something for him that didn't harm him; finally, Monaca's is gifts—she's the girl who has everything, but feels like she has nothing—a present, no matter how big or small, as long as it is genuine is precious to her

Speaking of, Monaca prob has a few gifts from the Warriors, and possibly even her other classmates, that she keeps. She says it's just for future blackmail but her heart says otherwise

Masaru is actually a pretty decent cook! He had grown tired of fast food so much he actually learnt how to make some basic meals. He sometimes even cooks for the others—mostly to impress them but still! Though he much prefers eating then preparing the meals

Jataro is awful at cooking tho—in fact, he's banned from the kitchen. He tends to get distracted and ends up putting random things into the mix

I have a feeling that all the Warriors have a 'liking' to Monaca, by different degrees however: Nagisa's is of course pupply love; Masaru thinks that they belong together since he's the Hero and she's the Princess; Kotoko probably sees her as a pure untainted angel that needs to be protected; and Jataro... well, maybe he's just confused lol

#headcanon #hcs #my hcs #anon ask #answered #warriors of hope #danganronpa #monaca towa #nagisa shingetsu #kotoko utsugi #jataro kemuri #masaru daimon #ultra despair girls

[muddypyro]

have been quite busy spending the past week 'in the barrel'

i have an uncle who's always said 'guess it's my time in the barrel' whenever shit really hit the fan and the norm of life was bad news. don't ask where the phrase comes from, as no one has a clue.

i hesitate to say it's truly barrel time for me as i've defenitely sruvived some bad shit, but here's the recap to date:

while watching over the firing monday, i woke to discover the merciless covid had once again returned to the household. still negative, i spent the day frantically sanitizing and masking with fingers crossed.

was glad to have scheduled the firing when i did, as the power did go out a few times with the windstorm tuesday. this, however, did not stop the unfolding calamity, my pre-packaged barrel. opened the kiln to see a disaster. glaze everywhere, all but a few works utterly destroyed, majority of shelves unsalvageable from glaze runoff, and it even managed to drip onto the kiln floor and through a vent hole. yikes! everything in my studio on hold until i can repair the kiln and wait for new shelves and patching compounds to arrive in the mail, purchased with the last of emergency funds hoping to not miss all of the upcoming contests and chance to make more work before the new year. i begin to feel sick by afternoon, test myself. i am become death covid.

i've had covid once before and this infection just laughs at the first experience. holy shit. wow. it's been 5 days now and no end in sight, but the barrel will decide.

i'll post pics of the destruction soon, it's really a sight lol. and aside from losing so much, the glazes turned out so wonderfully. as soon as i can, pics of the good shit will be shared here.

i don't like asking for help, but i could greatly use some. my business is fucked. money is tight. i am still sick af.

so...

when i get better i will be posting a sale on my work [thinking 22% off to celebrate the birthday i spent melting/degrading in quarantine] to try getting money in fast. you can also spread the word about the shit i make by sharing my website and your favorite posts here. that would mean so much and thanks!

i refuse to set up donations, being a firm believer in giving/taking equally and also that i am still with basic needs despite my poor kiln and livelihood being currently clusterfucked. this too shall pass, and that barrel won't be around forever.

stay tuned the one glaze test is sure to wow. still can't get over it.

#covid #update #pottery #ceramics #artists on tumblr #full time artist #disaster #kiln

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 317

Prophet and Loss/The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos

“Prophet and Loss”

Plot Description: to avoid the pain of Dean’s dire plan, the Winchesters take a case involving dead bodies with mysterious symbols carved into their chests

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: this BETTER BE A NIGHTMARE DEAN IS HAVING because why did we open with Dean in that box he built last episode? At the bottom of the ocean? And scared and regretful and trying to call and call out for Sam? And then his phone died

It was. Good.

The way these two take the most drastic steps every time. A few seasons ago, one of them was going to live on the moon or whatever…actually, I think that was also Dean and it had to do with Amara

Is he carving her while she’s alive?! And THEN drowning her? Yikes, my dude

I mean, it IS probably best that Sam told Cas before Dean could to get him researching another solution but to then say to Dean that he hasn’t even told him or Jack is shady

I mean…that’s one way to keep Cas out of the empt (not finding a solution so Dean goes through with his plan), but at what cost? (Cas was my thinking this but I sure was)

Is this dude trying to be a prophet? What’s going on here? Is he killing down the line prophets? What’s happening?

Yeah, Dean, there was a whole episode about one of the times John sent you away after pissing him off. Sam knows this stuff

Set that boundary, Sam! Yes!

There’s this actor playing a cop and he looked familiar. Turns out he’s had bit roles in two other spn episodes AND he’s just the kind of dude who gets cast as “cop #2” all the time. He’s acab but by that I mean assigned cop at birth

Mmmm Dean’s gonna know Sam told Cas from this phone call…oh, but because Cas flat out tells him that. Ok

Ah. The killer is actually next in line for prophet when Donatello dies

Is he really doing some biblical plague shit?? Why?!

I love how they say he’s not chosen yet he’s literally next in like for prophet. Correction: he WAS

*ghostly form of a woman appears* “Nick?” “is that you?” “Yes, Nick” “Lucifer?” “…Sarah.” Ksmejkekskwrjekwi

Aw hell yeah, Sarah!! You turn vengeful ghost on Nick’s ass!!! Please!! He chose Lucifer over you and would do it again! Tear his ass to shreds

Nick, you fucking asshole. You can’t even give your wife peace in her death by rejecting Lucifer for her sake.

GET. HIS. ASS. GIRL. (She has yet to get his ass)

Omg this is practically a break up scene between Cas and Dean

They all care about Dean SO MUCH and he sees it, but he’s just refusing to feel it

I do not like the smirk on Dean’s face after they revived Donatello

I can’t believe he’s making Cas explain to Donnie what happened to him

I throw my Dean apologism right out the window when Sam’s yelling at him about his massively self destructive behavior.

Ok wtf lol. There’s…something SO white American male about Sam punching Dean in the face and then saying (through gritted teeth, of course) “I believe in us!”

“The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos”

Plot Description: on the planet of Ranskoor Av Kolos, a deadly reckoning awaits the Doctor and her friends

Sometimes I wonder if knowledge of old who would help me understand some things. The first few minutes of this episode is one of those times

So something about this planet makes your mind and memory scramble

Ryan IS quite the pessimist

Ohhhhhhh the alien from the first episode with all of them is back and he’s killing this dude’s crew

Oh FINALLY, someone is having a one on one emotional conversation with the Doctor…wish it wasn’t this. They’re arguing whether Graham could/should kill that alien and the moral and ethical implications of doing so

Oh did they actually build the thing they were trying to in those first few minutes?

The fact that the Doctor can just say some shit and maybe it’s right is so funny. She’s unsure but she thinks she might have invented rubber boots

Ryan being the voice of reason between him and Graham was a surprise

Oh I don’t like that the Doctor can’t remember something…

I don’t even…um. So the alien wanted the other two to destroy their own planet? Anyway, the Doctor and Yaz thwarted that and Graham and Ryan trapped it in a stasis chamber so no harm no foul? I dunno. It was a pretty weak episode

#hellsite nostalgia tour 2023

[little-purple-alien]

Man the loneliness of trauma really does get completely debilitating sometimes

#trying not to be destructive over it lol but yikes #writings of murphy #cptsd #c-ptsd #mental health #complex trauma

[qingxintea]

heartbreak avenue (5)

on heartbreak avenue with albedo

gender neutral reader

https://qingxintea.tumblr.com/post/646961954411446272/heartbreak-avenue-2 i’ll hyperlink the rest later LOL

- albedo didn’t keep his promise.

- that “next time” he talked about, where he would bring you back… he didn’t. (hey! y/n, look at me. this isn’t you. this isn’t the y/n we all know and love. i can change you. OH YEAH? WELL I CAN ACCEPT THEM FOR WHO THEY ARE 🤬🤬)

- instead, he had let that friend of yours take you away as she said a couple things he took to heart.

- “y/n left for a reason.”

- that’s right. the only reason why he’s been chasing after you was because your encounter in mondstadt where you had abandoned everything

- though his thinking at the moment was rushed and unclear, he still remembers everything you said about your old self?

- it’s been slowly clicking in overtime- he hasn’t had enough time to process it really

- recalling your conversation with the butterfly girl- what was her name? ah, hu tao

- you had mentioned someone you helped at the expense of your feelings for him

- the letter you had responded with mentioning that you would go to any extent to help, and all those advice pieces … are really making their self clear right now

- generally, you liked him- for awhile now. but sucrose did too, and so you helped her with her journey instead. never acknowledging about how you felt

- he buried his head in his hands, questioning himself as to why he couldn’t draw it earlier.

- so now he knows, but what can he do..?

- it’s likely that you no longer have feelings for him and that liyue is your safe place you’d never leave :c

- and to be honest, who could blame you? your case is perfectly reasonable.

- he sighs and resumes his self destructive habitual studies and escapes into a distraction again.

~~

- “they go by the name of astral. an unknown organization that just appeared recently, no one knows if they’re good or bad. be on the lookout, yeah?”

- albedo merely nodded to the traveler, lost in his thoughts once again . it wouldn’t really bother him anyway until they caused an ordeal in mondstadt

- “..i knew you’d be uninterested. i just heard that… ah, nevermind. it’s probably untrue. continue on with your day then,” they smiled kindly and walked away

- …heard what?

- oh well, it was probably best to listen to them. by some extreme coincidence, the information provided may seem useful to him

- but genuinely, the truth was that he needed to take his mind off of you.

~~ time skip 🙈🙈🫀☹️☹️🤔💔

- the sound of running footsteps caught the alchemists attention

- mans was still in his labs conducting more experiments

- looks up, it’s traveler rushing ???? yikes

- “albedo .. it’s them. it’s y/n but… but - they’re different . please .. you have to see them” vv out of breath

- they point over to angels share frantically as they try to catch their breath in very feeble attempts. was it that urgent?

- i mean it was you. of course it was.

- he nods along and follows traveler back to the scene of crime or something

- it’s empty as hell and everyone has flooded away- besides two people

- you and diluc (CANON)

- except there’s a glowy red floaty ball in your hand and diluc looks extremely drained

- ketchup whitie collapses and you blow the ball thingy into the air and it traveled to the right before it’s gone

- “he really didn’t have to make it that difficult,” you tiredly mused, blinking slowly. you rested him against a wall bc ur too nice and it shows. literally the point of this whole series

- you finally turn around to meet their eyes, but it lingers on his a little bit longer.

- “oh… you.”

- traveler was about to say something in a moment of panic, but your eyes glowed vibrantly and they too, had fainted

- “i’m going to make it easy on you. you look tired,” you bluntly communicated to albedo. you snapped your fingers, then two of the same styled orbs manifested of energy came from their chests and onto your hand, in green and yellow

- you blew them away and they went the same direction, before once again, disappearing.

- “…of course, i’m going to need you to fall asleep.” the mere command from your voice alone somehow tranced him into a drowsy state, having him collapse as well

- you sighed exhaustedly, then healed them of their injuries??? commitment issues fr (kinnie moment)

- placed a small note in albedos hands before you left

“([phone]-24-18-10-17-12-7-4-21-23-16-12”

- then, without waiting a second longer, you left without a trace.

—

AND YES THE NOTE TRANSLATES KNTO SOMETHONG but there might be an error in there (very unlikely but yk) 🧑‍⚖️🧑‍⚖️ if u decode it oops major leak of story LOL

anyways i’ve been dropping a lot of hints relating to the reader but idk if y’all have picked up on it .. but the next part you definitely will

thank u for reading <3

#albedo angst #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin impact x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin impact #genshin impact imagine #genshin albedo #albedo genshin impact #albedo x reader #genshin

[nothoughtsonlynat]

Resurrect Me (N.R.)

Warnings: swearing; death; Hell/the Underworld; cliff jumping lol

Word Count≈ 3.1k (yikes lol my bad)

Hecate一 the goddess of magic, witchcraft, the night, the moon, ghosts, and necromancy. Known to be an intricate mosaic of good and evil, destruction and beauty. Capable of granting wishes, summoning the dead, resurrections, teleportation, warping realities on unfathomable scales, mind control, energy manipulation, and any sorcery or magic known to the Gods. Second only to Zeus himself.

I am the human embodiment of Hecate. I am not Hecate; she merely resides in the depths of my soul and provides me guidance. We do not communicate through words; she speaks through dreams and gut feelings, and sometimes even through signs in the outside world. I have not mastered the powers she’s granted me, nor have I reached my full potential. In addition to the Goddess’ powers, I hold the basic Olympian powers, such as superhuman speed and stamina. I have no recollection of how I merged with Hecate or the life I lived before this point, and she has provided me with no answers, but I do not question her motives. 

Agent Phil Coulson came across me in my temple in Turkey. Apparently, he had discovered strange energy readings coming from the temple. When he arrived, I used the power of energy manipulation to blow the concrete off of me, and that is the first thing I remember一 emerging from underneath Hecate’s temple.

I joined the Avengers during the Battle of New York. Agent Coulson had recommended me to Fury when he was piecing together the Avengers Initiative. In the three years between my awakening and the invasion, I practiced my sorcery mercilessly and studied Hecate deep in the Greek countryside. I’ve stuck with the Avengers throughout the years, fighting every battle alongside them. Through the ups and downs, I’ve fallen head over heels for Natasha Romanoff. One would assume that with so much power, I’d be confident and have any mortal begging at my feet. That couldn’t be any more inaccurate, however. As I’ve said, I am not Hecate; I am simply the human embodiment of the goddess. And as a human, I turn into a blushing, stuttering mess whenever the levelheaded assassin is near. Consequently, there have been many years of pining, but I’ve yet to muster up the courage to ask the woman on a date.

In our most recent war, we’ve gone up against a mad titan一 Thanos. We lost terribly. Half of all living things inhabiting the universe were snapped away. I can’t help but ponder whether things would’ve gone differently if I had better mastered my powers. I potentially hold all the capabilities of the goddess of magic; aside from Zeus, I hold more power than any being to ever exist. I’ve practiced my sorcery every day for the past five years on the off chance that we ever get a rematch一 a chance to bring everyone back. I’ve improved significantly, but Hecate has been oddly quiet for the past few years. It’s driving me crazy. I know she’s still there, but she hardly provides an ounce of guidance.

And so, that is where I find myself now一 practicing sorcery in the room specifically designed to isolate me when I use dark magic. Everyone who has access to the training section of the compound knows that they should never enter this room. It is far too dangerous for regular mortals. As I warp the room’s reality, a dark mist envelops me. When it clears, the room has changed into a 50s ballroom. I look down to see an elegant maroon ball gown covering my body, and I scan the empty area. I hear a pair of heels clicking toward me, and I spin around, already panicking. In order for someone to be here with me, they would have to be an inhabitant of the location’s true reality. My eyes land upon the woman I’ve grown to love, dressed up for the event. She is wearing an extravagant light blue ball gown, and her hair is carefully done up. 

“Natasha? What are you doing here?”

“Why I came to dance with you, of course.” She steps closer and drapes her arms around my neck, swaying to the nonexistent music. Stay calm. Don’t panic. There’s no way I’m making her do this. I’m not even doing anything! Of course I’m the one making her do this, who else would it be?! Breathe in. Breathe out. My powers don’t control me. I control them. Just breathe. I can do this. I know how to do this.

As I focus on the magic coursing through my veins, a black mist envelops us, and the room returns to its original form一 a basic training room with black padded walls. I immediately take a large step back from Natasha.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, Natasha?! You know you can’t come in here! I could’ve seriously hurt you!”

“I...I’m sorry. I thought you’d just be moving shit with your mind. I didn’t realize you could do...that, whatever that was.”

“That was reality manipulation. I didn’t know you were here and I don’t have full control of it, so you got caught up in it. Are you okay? Do you remember it?”

“Yeah, I remember it clear as day. I was still me and I was still in control, it was just...different, I guess.”

“Well, I literally warped your reality, so even if you felt in control, you might not have been.”

“You stopped it, though. I remember when that seemed impossible. You’re getting better.”

“Thanks, I guess.” I awkwardly scratch the back of my neck. “What did you come in here for in the first place?”

“This is gonna sound crazy, but Scott Lang is here. We might have a way to bring everybody back.”

“Wait, what? Holy shit. It’s happening. Okay, come on then!” I eagerly walk past her, grabbing her hand as I pass her, and we leave my training room. I realize that I’m still holding her hand as we make it to the meeting room, and I immediately drop it, clearing my throat. If I wasn’t so familiar with the sensation, then I would swear that my ears and cheeks are on fire.

<//>

We all step onto the platform in matching white and red time-travel suits. “We’re really doing this?”

“Hell yeah, we’re doing this,” Clint answers.

“Alright, then. We bring everybody back,” I say with determination. “Whatever it takes,” Steve adds.

“See you in a minute,” Natasha adds with a smirk. Before I can appreciate how beautiful she looks with the glimmer of hope in her eyes, we’re flying through a flurry of colors. Nebula, Natasha, Rhodey, Clint, and I land on Morag. We all say our respective goodbyes before Nat, Clint, and I get on a jet to head to Vormir.

<//>

“A soul for a soul.”

“What? That’s insane. Look, no offense, Mr. Bloody Tampon, but why should we just trust what you’re saying? Because you know their fathers’ names?”

“I didn’t.” I looked into Natasha’s eyes as she spoke and I instantly wish that I could replace the dull sadness with the bright hope that had filled them before.

“He doesn’t know my father’s name. If he’s some mystical being, then why can’t he tell me that?” I turned to face him as I asked the question.

“I’m afraid you are a mystery. I am meant to know everything about any being who seeks the stone, but I know nothing of your identity.”

“Hm. Seems like a load of bullshit to me,” I deadpanned.

“We need to do this. We need to bring everyone back. I’ve spent the past five years trying to reverse the snap, and now I finally know how to fix it. Let me do it.” As Natasha spoke, she grabbed both of my hands in hers.

“And I’ve spent every day for the past five years training to do this. I wasn’t just practicing sorcery and talking to dead people for fun, Nat. All I wanted was to do better一 to fix this. If anyone is jumping off that cliff, it’s gonna be me.”

“No. Absolutely not. Neither of you is dying for that stone. I’ve done horrible things these past few years. I’ve killed...so many people. It should be me,” Clint says, and Natasha and I turn to face him, but one of her hands remains in mine.

“No way in hell, Clint. And not you either, Nat. Both of you guys have families. You’re not sacrificing yourselves. I won’t let you. And you can’t stop me even if you try.” Nat gives me a questioning look as I mention her family and I speak in her head ‘I know about them, Nat. And they need you. She needs her big sister.’

“What are you saying?” I can hear the anxiety lacing Nat’s words, and it causes a pit to form in my stomach.

“I think you know what I’m saying, Natty.” 

“Then you don’t leave me much of a choice.” She shoots a Widow’s Bite toward me, but I stop it using energy manipulation without even having to lift a finger.

“You can’t beat me, Nat. Please, don’t fight me on this.”

“I call bullshit.” Out of the corner of my eye, I see Clint running toward the edge while we’re distracted, and I teleport in front of him, throwing him backward. I use mind control to force him to stay down. I sense Natasha running toward the edge behind me, and I teleport in front of her. I use energy manipulation to keep her in place, and I grab onto her biceps.

“I’m really sorry, Nat. I hate that I’m doing this to you, but I can’t let you throw yourself off a cliff for some stupid stone. Your life is worth so much more than that. You’re an amazing person, and your ledger was cleared of its red so long ago. Don’t let anyone tell you any different.”

“This is sounding an awful lot like a goodbye.”

“You can be sarcastic all you want, but I’m not walking out of this one, Natty.”

“Don’t do this. The team needs you.”

“No, they don’t, Nat, and we both know it. They need you.”

“And what if I need you?!”

“Well if that’s the case, you’ll figure it out, just like you always do. Don’t let something like this hold you back. Goodbye, Natasha Romanoff.” I kiss her cheek before turning around. I start walking towards the edge, but it quickly turns into a sprinting pace as I hear Nat screaming for me to stop. Just before I reach the edge, I lift the mind control from Clint and I release Nat, just in case it doesn’t automatically lift when I die. I push myself off the cliff, turning mid-jump so I’m not facing the ground. As I’m falling through the air, I see Clint holding Nat in his arms as her screams fill my ears. I hit the ground and everything goes black.

<//>

“Hello, y/n. It’s good to see you again.” I sat up and一 what the hell is that smell? “Ah, yes. That would be burning flesh. Welcome to Hell, darling.”

“Uh...what? Who are you?”

“Yes, I suppose I should explain, hm? I am Hecate, Goddess of一”

“Yeah, I know what you’re the goddess of. How did I get here?”

“I thought you were smarter than this. You died, obviously.”

“And went to Hell? Damn.”

“Oh, relax. Hell isn’t what the mortals think it is. This is the Underworld. All of the dead reside here. The bad people get punished, the good people don’t. Simple as that. We don’t have a lot of time, so I need to explain. I am cursed; I cannot leave the Underworld. However, my human embodiment can, and that is where you come into play. You hold all my power, and I can see you’ve been practicing, but you’ve never lived up to your full potential.”

“Hey! Rude!”

“Don’t interrupt. I didn’t allow you to live up to your full potential, not until we met, anyway.”

“And I had to die in order for that to happen?”

“Yes. I’m giving you all of my power, but I can still stop you if I ever need to. I know you don’t want to risk hurting the people you love, especially the redhead, but you need to trust yourself. Trust your powers. Have a little faith. You are a goddess, remember. Don’t let people forget it. That purple thumb is nothing compared to you, even with his colorful rocks. Your family needs you now. You must help them.”

“That’s it? Why do they need help? How will I know what to do?”

“I will always be there to help you, Y/N. You can handle this. This is nothing. You are part of me, just as I am part of you. You are my daughter, after all. I should know your capabilities better than anyone.”

“Wait, daughter?!”

“Oh, did I forget to mention that part? Oh well, it doesn’t matter right now, anyway. You need to go.”

“Go where?”

“Home, darling.” 

The earth above us cracks open and I can hear faint sounds of fighting on the surface. I look at Hecate as she nods. Before I even realize I’m doing it, black mist surrounds my body and lifts me through the crack. I step out of the mist onto the ground and a staff appears in my right hand. I tap it once on the ground and my white suit is replaced by an all-black leather outfit that’s definitely made for a goddess. I smirk and make eye contact with the titan across the battlefield. His sickly creatures race toward me as they notice the new threat on the field. I summon an army of ghouls from the cracks in the earth. As the aliens and the undead clash, I teleport in front of Thanos.

“And who might you be, dear?” He acts confident, but I can sense his fear.

“I am Y/N, daughter of Hecate.” He tilts his head in a questioning manner. “Oh, did someone not study mythology? Hm, then let’s be blunt, shall we? I’m a goddess, ass-chin.” I throw my staff at his throat, but he catches it. He moves to swing his large sword at me, but I capture his arm in black mist. When he tries to move the other arm, I restrain that one, as well. “Well, that surely can’t be all you’ve got, hm? Pity, I thought it’d be more exciting than that.” If I were to look in a mirror at that moment, I would’ve noticed my ghostly pale skin, black eyes, and the raw power spreading through my veins like a black road-map.

“It’s not over yet, my dear child.” Before I can question the meaning of his words, an alien tosses him the gauntlet. It slides on his exposed hand, but I hold it open with dark magic. I look around and notice that the army of the undead is nowhere to be seen. My teammates are pinned down, even with the help of those who were snapped. There is a feeling in my gut and a voice in my head that tells me what I must do. I pull the gauntlet off his hand with black mist and slide my hand inside. I feel the power surging into my body. “What are you doing? That power will kill you!” Thanos sounds truly desperate.

“That’s cute. Truly, it is, but you can’t kill someone who’s already dead.” I close my hand and snap my fingers. His army fades to dust and he slumps to the ground before floating away with them. I drop the gauntlet to the ground and look around. Natasha runs toward me and throws her arms around my neck in a firm hug.

“Wha一what happened to you? How are you here? I thought you died!”

I wrap my arms around her waist and rest my chin on her shoulder before saying, “I did die. I am dead.”

She pulls away and looks at me from head to toe. “Well that explains why you’re so damn pale, but now I have so many more questions.”

“I am Hecate’s daughter, so I am technically a goddess, like her. I’m not sure if I was technically resurrected or not, but I can probably一”

She cut me off with a gentle yet passionate kiss. She pulls away and searches my eyes. “I’ve wanted to do that for a very long time,” she admits.

“Me too,” I breathe out.

“Yeah, I picked up on that. You’re not very discrete.” I laughed and a smirk spread across her face. “As sexy as this whole ‘powerful goddess’ thing is, am I going to get the old you back? You know, the one who blushes whenever I look at her? The one who’s, like, alive?”

I smile at her and glance down at her lips as a thick black mist appears behind me. I step backward into it as her face morphs into a look of confusion. She disappears from sight as a wall of black fills my vision, and a surge of power spreads throughout my body. I fall to my knees and the black cloud disappears. Natasha rushes over and kneels in front of me. “Are you okay? What the hell was that?”

“I’m not entirely sure, but I think I’m alive again.” I lift my head and meet her eyes.

“Your skin isn’t crazy pale anymore, and your eyes are their normal color again.”

“Sweet.”

“Cool.”

We both crack up and I lean my forehead against hers as our laughter fades.

Tony interrupts our moment of peace. “This is all good and dandy, but does someone wanna explain what the hell just happened?”

I raise my head and look at my teammates一 my family. “I kicked the purple thumb’s ass. That’s what happened.” I can feel a warm presence in my heart, and I know that my mother is with me.

“Yes, yes, I noticed. I also noticed a bunch of demons. Care to explain that one?”

“They weren’t demons...they were just...the souls...of dead people. I can summon the dead. You knew that.”

“Uh, I definitely didn’t know that.” I laugh and shake my head at the eccentric man. 

I stand up, pulling Natasha with me, and bring her into another embrace. “I’m really glad you’re okay, Natty,” I whisper in her ear before pressing a delicate kiss to her temple.

A/N: I literally had this completely finished and edited over a month ago and I hadn’t posted it yet soooooo... idk here it is

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff fic #natasha one shot #black widow #black widow x reader

[uwurakax]

another day ♡

pairing: oikawa x f!reader ♡

genre: angsty // exes // mutual pining ♡

summary: after the constant fighting and bubbling insecurities, you and oikawa both decide that breaking up is probably for the best. too bad that it wasn’t what either if you had wanted ♡

♡ read part one ‘save your tears’ here ♡

word count: 2k ♡

author’s note: super tired, i should be packing but im not lol, 4am gang ayyy. as always not proofread because i cannot stomach the idea of rereading what i wrote. this was what originally ‘save your tears’ was going to be, but part one got too long so haha. spoils of part one, so if you haven’t read it go ahead, or don’t lolol it could be read alone ig hurr hurr ♡

♡ (inspired by save your tears - the weeknd/ariana grande) ♡

At one point in time, you would’ve enjoyed an atmosphere like this; the blaring lights, pounding music, and even the heat radiating off warm bodies in a cramped space. It was much more enjoyable when you had the familiar, comforting presence of him.

Yes him: Oikawa Tōru. Also known as the the guy who broke your heart less than two months ago. You hadn’t seen him since the week after, finally being able to pick up everything and go. It was scary how silent it was between you two. The unit the both of you had made a home, your first home with him, just a little more barren. Just a little more bare.

Just a little more empty.

Once homely rooms were now plain. To anyone else, it could be called minimalistic or modern. Sleek if you were to exaggerate it. To the both of you however, it was just stone cold. A lifeless corpse. One poor imitation of what it once was.

And seeing it like this was almost enough to have your heart break for a second time. It was a physical representation of your relationship. The feelings of warmth, comfort, admiration, any and every word any literary body could ever akin to love was once found here. It was sad to see it gone, almost like it was never there. However if you looked past the surface you’d see all the small details of things that once occupied the room. The once full drawers now easily fitting clothes with plenty of room to spare. A countertop with products only to one half of the sink. The minuscule dust imprints left behind on the shelves that once housed your books.

The lingering smell of your perfume that was once so prominent.

You couldn’t tell, but Oikawa could. In the week you were gone, it slowly started to fade. The first night Oikawa was drowning in it. It clung to, what once was, your pillow and on the blanket. Choking and suffocating him with the sweet smell. He couldn’t bear to see the bed without you in it, and hated the God awful smell. Opening the window and facing away, he had a dreamless sleep that night.

And as the week passed, so did the scent of you.

He couldn’t explain why, but the moment he opened the door, his body felt at ease. His eyes blessed, even if you had those dark circles and slightly red eyes with unkempt hair. It was as if it was instinct to feel relief at being near you.

It was the longest few hours of Oikawa’s life that day, and somehow it was still just too short. Helping you gather your things, putting them into boxes and loading them into a tiny hired truck until eventually there was nothing left.

You were gone from the apartment, and now Oikawa’s life.

It was awkward the second time, saying goodbye. The finality of it all dawning on the both of you. You at least had this excuse to see each other once more. After this, there was nothing. No more reasons to come back, to call, message or even see each other again.

This was officially the last time you’d ever get to see Oikawa Tōru.

You’d both stood there for a few moments, only the wind against leaves and the occasional car offering any sort of background noise. Neither of you wanting or willing for this moment to end. Despite it all, it wasn’t hard to see that you both yearned for each other. Just how cruel it was that you couldn’t see it.

Oikawa kept your pillow close that night. The smell of you was so faint, he was sure that it wouldn’t be too long before it completely faded. As he held the plush item near his chest he couldn’t help but wonder what kind of life he could’ve had with you if he wasn’t so prideful? All the fantasies and white picket fences surged in his mind, and so he finally drifted off to sleep, thinking of you.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

“Here”

You turned to see your best friend handing you a glass of, well you weren’t sure exactly but anything to dull your senses at this point was okay in your book. Yes, almost two months since your breakup and you were still so torn. It was what he wanted right? Your lives are better this way. You’re sure his is. He wouldn’t have to hear you “nag” as he so put it, and you didn’t have to feel the exhaustion resulting because of it.

It was better this way. You knew it. Oikawa knew it. Your friends and family knew it. Heck even the old ladies down the damn street knew it.

So why did it feel so shitty.

You downed the drink quickly, not wanting to go through the spiral of emotions you were sure you were going to experience. You’d deal with the pain and hangover tomorrow like the adult you were. For now you just wanted to dance till your feet hurt, and then drink until they stopped hurting. A quick descent into self destruction that you’re sure you’d regret.

Or maybe you wouldn’t.

The moment you turned your head to get back to the dance floor you locked eyed with him.

For a moment you stopped breathing. The music faded out quickly and the patrons of the club disappeared. Suddenly it was just you and him.

He looked good this time around, nothing like the last time you saw him. His perfectly fluffed and styled hair that was just so effortlessly Oikawa had become messy bed head. His bright chocolate eyes that twinkled just a little with mischief when he smirked had become sunken. His whole demeanour had completely drooped into a depressive state. It hurt to see.

He wasn’t like that now. He looked like how he had been before. No longer were the remnants of a heartbroken man. Oikawa Tōru had gone back to his charming self once again.

A cute girl with silky, long black hair approached him and just as quick as they went, everything came flooding back; the music, people and you found yourself being able to breathe again.

She touched his arm and laughed. The look in her eyes filled with the glimmer coyness. Her body language oozed with flirty persona. It was all too familial.

You should’ve guessed that he’d date again. It wasn’t like he couldn’t. The moment you both severed the relationship he had every right to do what he wanted. You did too. Sure you were seeing someone, but it wasn’t like that.

All too, touchy-feely.

It hurt to see, you weren’t going to lie. Seeing the way he touched her, held her, danced with her. For a good portion of the night you saw it. Seeing him be with her, the way he used to with you. No longer being the main character in his story; you were in the audience, watching.

You didn’t want to stay until the ending.

Without a word, you briskly brushed passed sweaty bodies, being bumped a few times before you finally made it to the door and opened it.

You walked a couple paces to the middle of the footpath, deeply inhaling the fresh air. It wasn’t suffocating anymore. You fumbled with your purse, reaching inside to pull out your phone. With the glow of neon lights emanating behind you, you saw a stray tear on the blackness of your screen.

Fuck, when did that happen?

You wiped it with the palm of your hand, and went to unlock your phone. As you prepared to send a text you heard the call of your voice.

“Tōr-Oikawa?”

He mentally winced at this, the formal tone of using his surname struck something inside. He didn’t like it, not at all. It wasn’t right, it felt strange.

“What are you doing here?”

“What are you doing here? You followed me”

“Right... I guess I just wanted to see how you were, that’s all” he looked away, awkwardly scratching the back of his head. You softened at this. It just took you back to why you fell for him in the first place. The little things like this, that made you feel cared for and loved. Perhaps for a few minutes you could be delusional and pretend that Oikawa still cared for you.

“I’m fine, what about you? How is everything going?” Yikes. You cringed at how awkward you were being. You supposed that that’s how it was, not exactly friends and not complete strangers either.

“Yeah fine too...” he trailed off, and just like that you were brought back to that time before you left. Before the official goodbye. Not ready to end things just yet, but neither knowing what more to say.

Just for a little while, let me remember every trace, curve and detail.

You didn’t know what came over you, but soon enough you found yourself drawing closer to Oikawa. He looked at you with half lidded eyes, not daring to move a step, almost afraid if he did it would ruin this moment with you. Yes, it was selfish but...

You lifted your hand to cup his cheek, just like a memory from before. Using the pad of your thumb, you gently brushed over the soft skin. Ever so delicately, you traced down his jaw. The intimacy of your movements crossed a boundary between you. You knew it and he did too. You’d let yourselves be greedy though.

Oikawa raised his own hands to touch your face, perfectly ingraining it into his mind and body. His fingers slowly going over your features. He wouldn’t allow himself to forget any part of you.

It wasn’t long until you both wanted to overstep more.

The longing between you too great to try and stop. Eventually you both moved closer, faces and soul alike reaching for the other. Just a bit closer.

“Y/N?”

“Oikawa?”

You both frantically pulled away, heart racing now.

“Kageyama..”

“Tobio”

Oikawa tried to hide the venom in his voice, he really did, but when he saw Kageyama make his way beside you he couldn’t help but see red.

It didn’t seem like life was playing a very fair game.

“Oikawa are you alright?” He looked down at the petite girl beside him, now clinging to his arm. He threw on one of his brilliant smiles and told her it was okay.

“Are you cold? Here” Oikawa couldn’t keep up that smile for too long, not when he saw him putting his jacket around you. How you snuggled into the warmth. How it showed Oikawa that you were no longer his, and that you now found solace in another.

He couldn’t blame you, he knew that deep inside. He did the same, why shouldn’t you? It didn’t stop the burning hatred and envy he felt. The overwhelming sadness that enveloped him. All a heavy dump of emotions thrown on him within a few seconds.

You felt it too though. That girl hanging off his arm. Getting to parade around that Oikawa was hers. It was totally unreasonable to feel this way. You both ended things. It was mutual right? You would’ve told him and he would’ve told you if this breakup was a mistake right?

Right?

“Wanna go?” Kageyama whispered in your ear. You nodded.

“It was nice seeing you again T-Oikawa” you smiled sadly.

“You too Y/N...bye” you both turned away, walking in opposite directions. With every step, your heartache grew just a little more. Almost like your body needed to be near his, the memories it held being more truthful than your head could ever be.

Your heart, body and soul wanted Oikawa.

Your mind told you to let him go for his sake.

“Hey Y/N?”

“Hey Oikawa?”

“Yes Kageyama?”

“Hmm?”

“He was your ex right? Oikawa?”

“That girl back there, is she her? The ex?

“Yeah he was”

“Yeah, she was”

“Do you still love him?”

“Do you still love her?”

There was a pause and you both stopped, mulling the question over.

Did you still love each other? It wasn’t hard to tell, everyone knew the answer. Ask any stranger but...

“No”

..

...

..

You both lied.

#haikyuu x reader #oikawa x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu angst #hq angst #oikawa angst

[all-hail-stevinel]

Okay so i’ve been seein some ppl say that Spinel and the Diamonds were ignoring Steven’s problems and not giving helpful advice and ngl….i dont agree?? I mean, i kinda get it but tbh i think they did the best they could at addressing Steven’s core issues w/o havin the needed context since it's clear that he hasn't spoken to them since Spinel left so how were they to know how he’s been?

Tbh i think what they had to say wasn't what Steven wanted to hear because it wasn't an easy answer but needed to. I mean for one:

Yellow, without as many words, showed Steven that despite her past cruel actions she is trying to fix it by dedicating time towards those she's wronged. Showing that even the most unforgivable actions can be amended for with effort and dedication, so much so that now, her powers once destructive and anger-driven now have reversed into the ability to heal forms and alter them on command. 

Yellow not only is working to be better, but she has control over her form and that of others. Lol sounds like something Steven could use, huh? 

After all the damage I’ve done, it’s only right to use my powers for a little reconstructive work on the gems I’ve hurt.

Then BLUE, my floaty weed cloud queen had her own hard-hitting advice for Steven. While I can admit the drug clouds are definitely not a solution for Steven’s problems, how Blue arrived there was

Her powers once used to isolate herself and emotionally hurt those around her, were reversed by spending time thinking about her actions and how to hold herself accountable-“i realized i had to make up for my awful behavior!” 

she was able to evaporate her tears into happy clouds and instead focus her energy on the love and positivity in her life like dudes wtf

My little reason why, you make me want to try, loving you~

Then finally! Queen bee White!!!! The wildest Tyrant to ever grace the galaxy has traded in her T-pose for meditation and a $20 Wal-mart yoga mat and it's great!!

If anything, I thought White was one of the most helpful (not only almost dying trying to help Steven, lol) but for how she showed him her power had reversed. She had learned to stop being so controlling and to trust others to the point where she regularly lets those she once enslaved puppet her around for kicks/activism.

In a deeper sense, White who once thought of everyone as “lesser life forms” is now every day allowing those same lifeforms to guide her around to have new experiences and see new perspectives. To show and teach White different ways of being and give a fair voice to all those she interacts with

And she tries to help Steven with that new power, they all do. But in the end, despite being pretty good advice and a blatant show that even unchecked diamond powers can be controlled and used for good with a support system and open communication, Steven rejects it-

He rejects it all because he was recently traumatized. Killed a gem in the last episode, remember? On Top of his already festering trauma from before! That they were all complicit in! Yikes!

none of it, the advice, the song, the perspective was the easy “Oh Why Yes Steven! We as diamonds always go through this rough patch. Here’s ‘X’ to fix it immediately!” that he was clearly hoping for, but instead were all the things he just ran away from.

A support system, blatant concern for his well being, requests for open honesty, and most importantly-

Attempts to get at the root of the problem. Something Steven himself is just not ready for.  

Which really comes to head when he grabs Spinel, desperate for someone who was once so angry and vengeful and violent to show him the way. And what does she do?

She parrots back his own advice.

Which why? Because it stuck with her. It helped her. It made her see a different perspective and gave her what she needed to move forward. It made Steven furious to hear and he ran from her, thinking she also couldn't help, but Spinel really did confront him with what Steven needs to realize.

He can make a change.

But he has to choose too. He has to ask for help and accept it. He has to be honest, he has to confront his problems if he wants to move forward. He can make it right but to do so, ...he needs to be willing to change.

#su #suf #charater meta #steven universe #the diamonds #blue diamond #spinel #yellow diamond #white diamond #here’s to hoping it wont be a change for the worse #mah thoughts #i LOVED this episode guys #it was*kiss* perfection #suf spoilers

[aomine-ryo]

hi!! could i please request aomine + kise w a super insecure s/o but she doesn’t really say anything about it? but overtime the boys see how closed off she seems w everything ? aaa sorry if this doesn’t make sense

It made sense, don’t worry!! I hope you like this x

Scenario: Kise and Aomine with an insecure s/o

Kise

You loved dating Kise— you really did. As someone who had tendencies to worry about what others thought of you as well as be over-critical on yourself, being with him was quite refreshing. His bubbly personality and constant reassurance definitely helped you gain some self-love that you probably wouldn’t have been able to find without him.

There was one issue though. Kise was a rather popular person, being a model and all. For the first few months of your relationship, you managed to stay hidden by not going out in public with him too often. Of course, the two of you couldn’t always have dates at each other’s houses because there were so many places Kise wanted to take you, so you slowly began to go out together.

It didn’t take long for rumours to go around about your relationship, considering Kise’s popularity as a model was growing quite rapidly at this point. At first, you didn’t mind too much because they were just rumours and no one could confirm nor deny it per say. Furthermore, you felt quite happy knowing that Kise was all yours, and that you were in a relationship where you lifted each other up, so what others said about it wasn’t something you were concerned about.

However, that was until people started sneaking pictures of the two of you in public. You didn’t notice anything as it happened because you were caught up with Kise, but a few hours after you returned home, your social media was plastered with mentions as people tagged you in photos with your boyfriend. Looking at the surge of those photos made you begin to feel overwhelmed. You couldn’t help but read what people had to say about it, even though you knew you’d probably regret it.

At first, you didn’t really see anything too bad. Things like ‘Oh a new couple! How cute’ and ‘They’re adorable together, Kise-kun looks so happy’ seemed to be scattered amongst more surprised and sceptical comments that questioned the validity of the photos. And then you found the hate.

‘Yikes. Why is Kise dating someone like that?’, ‘No offense but Kise can do better’, ‘Did they pay Kise to date them or something? I never imagined him actually dating someone like that lol’ along with many other comments of that sort was soon all you saw. The nicer comments that were sprinkled here and there suddenly lost all its value as the meaner ones were all you seemed to look at.

You switched your phone off and put it aside as you began to feel your throat close up. As your brain began to question your self worth, a few tears managed to escape, even though you were trying so hard not to let it get to you. Maybe they were right? was all you could think about as you slowly but surely beat yourself up about it.

“Y/N-cchi! Are you free after school?” Kise chirped as you met up with him at recess a few days later.

“Probably. Why?”

“Let’s go on a date! There’s this boba café nearby that I think you’d really like,” he said with a smile, cheery as ever.

“I’m not sure. I think I’ll have to pass,” you said softly. You really didn’t want any more online attention than you were already getting.

“Why not?” he pouted.

You looked up at his frowning face and felt a wave of guilt. You made him sad. The comments were right. You don’t deserve him. “I just don’t feel like it,” you shrugged, pinching yourself.

“You’ll feel better when you try their drinks— trust me. It’ll be fun,” Kise said, giving you a smile that never failed to make your heart melt.

With a heavy sigh, you nodded slightly, “Alright I guess we can go then.”

Kise’s face lit up once again as his arms wrapped around you so tight that you felt like you couldn’t even breathe. “Yay, a date with Y/N-cchi!” he sang.

After school, the two of you walked to the cafe together. The weather was quite pleasant, and the bright yellow sun definitely improved your mood ever so slightly. As you walked, Kise took your hand in his like he usually would, but almost instantly, you pulled it away from him, gaining a look of confusion in response.

“What’s wrong, Y/N-cchi?” Kise asked, concerned.

“It’s nothing. My palms are just a bit sweaty, so I don’t think you’d wanna hold my hand,” you lied. You couldn’t help but be on edge in the case that someone was watching you.

“They felt fine to me, don’t worry about that,” Kise said, reaching for your hand once again.

You couldn’t really think of anything else to say to refuse without garnering any questions from him, so you reluctantly let him hold your hand, looking around anxiously. This keeping an eye out lasted for quite some time and Kise seemed to notice that your attention wasn’t fully directed towards him like it normally would be.

“Y/N-cchi, are you really sure everything is okay? You’ve barely even looked at me today,” Kise said as the two of you sipped on your drinks in the cafe.

“I’m fine,” you answered simply, over-correcting your actions by focusing on Kise and pretending everything was okay.

“Really? You seem really nervous,” Kise said.

“Ryouta, I’m fine, don’t worry,” you said, trying to sound as reassuring as possible.

“If there’s ever anything worrying you, you can tell me,” he said sincerely, placing his hand on top of yours and giving it a tight squeeze. “You know that, right?”

For a moment you really considered telling him what’s been bothering you, but you were afraid. You thought that it was really stupid of yourself to get affected so much by something like this and you didn’t want him to judge you for it— even though you were aware that he’d never do that.

“I know,” you nodded as you leaned back in your seat, filled with uncertainty and regret.

Once again, when you got back home, you were met with even more pictures of you and Kise from your date. You noticed that you had a frown on your face in pretty much all the photos. And of course the comments seemed to notice too.

‘lol his date doesn’teven look like they want to be there’, ‘that person looks annoying, why’s Kise dating someone like that’, ‘if I were with Kise I’d probably pay more attention to him than they are’.

Day by day, the comments increased. Kise’s agency managed to be able to keep the tabloids relatively silent about it. There were small articles here and there, but none of them were all too bad. However, there was no way they could control what was being said on the internet. Kise did call you up to remind you not to be too concerned about what people were saying. In fact, he urged you to do what he does and avoid the comment sections completely. But at that point, it was already too late. Looking at what others said about you online quickly became a daily thing, sending you down a spiral of self-destruction that only got worse.

Slowly, you began to avoid going outside and started making more and more excuses to not go out with Kise. You did still really like spending time with him, but the only time you were truly comfortable was when you were somewhere private with no other people around, and that wasn’t something Kise could do too often because he liked going outside.

He’d invite you to hang out with his friends every so often but you’d always refuse, saying that you were too busy. In all honesty, you hated lying to him but you felt like you had to.

One afternoon, you were laying down in bed after a tiring day of school and scrolling through comments yet again, when you heard the doorbell ring. It was Kise.

“Ryouta? What are you doing here?” you asked with a confused expression. “Don’t you have practice?”

“Yeah but you didn’t come to watch so I got worried,” Kise explained as he stepped into your house. “What happened, Y/N-cchi? You always watch my practice.”

“I’m sorry, I just didn’t feel too well,” you replied, your eyes fixed on the floor.

“What? Are you okay?” Kise asked, in a slightly panicked tone as his hand immediately reached for your forehead to check your temperature. “You seem fine.”

You responded with nothing but silence as you pursed your lips and continued to stare at the floor as if it was the most interesting thing in the world.

Kise leaned down to try and meet your gaze. “Y/N-cchi, what’s really going on? You’ve been really distant lately. Have you gotten tired of me or something?” Kise asked, his usual cheery voice suddenly going all soft.

“No, it’s nothing like that,” you shook your head, surprised that he’d even think of something like that.

“Then what is it?”

“I don’t know,” you mumbled.

“Y/N-cchi, please tell me what’s going on so that I can help. I really hate seeing you like this. I can’t remember the last time I saw a genuine smile from you, which sucks because I really like your smile,” Kise said as he cupped your face in his hands and tilted your head up to look at him in the eye.

You felt tears well up in your eyes as you thought back to all the things you’ve read about yourself. Kise genuinely cared for you and you told yourself yet again that you really don’t deserve him. “I just don’t feel very confident going out so much with you,” you admitted softly.

“What? Why’s that?” Kise asked, amber eyes filled with concern and worry.

“Because there are people who sneak photos of us and post them online. And the comments are always just so... mean,” you said, your voice breaking as tears began to roll down your cheeks.

“Didn’t I tell you not to look at those? What did they say?”

“T-That I’m not good enough for you, and that I don’t deserve you,” you replied, sobbing like a baby at this point.

“And you’re going to believe what a bunch of random people say about you?” Kise said, which silenced you for a moment as you thought about it. “Listen Y/N-cchi, you’re beautiful and kind and one of the most caring people I’ve ever met. I’m the luckiest person in the world because I get to call you mine. If anything, I don’t deserve you— I mean it. No one could ever make me think that you’re not good enough because in my eyes you’re my everything,” Kise said, voice so soft and tender that it just filled your body with warmth.

“Are you sure?” you asked, unable to process the fact that this boy had so much love for you.

Kise pecked your lips and gave you a smile. “I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life.”

“I’m sorry for not talking about it to you sooner and acting so aloof,” you said.

“It’s okay. We can take it slow and just spend more time alone, alright?” Kise said as he wiped your tears away with his thumb.

“Yeah, that would be nice,” you sniffled.

“I hope you can see yourself the way I see you someday. You’re really amazing, Y/N-cchi. I love you so goddamn much,” he said, honey eyes full of care and sincerity as he placed a soft kiss on your forehead.

You couldn’t help but smile at the sound of those words that made your heart skip a beat, “I love you too, Ryouta.”

Kise’s face brightened up again as he too began to grin, “There’s that gorgeous smile— I’ve missed it.”

Aomine

Aomine was aware that you had times where you felt insecure every now and then and of course, he did his best to minimise it and check up on you to make sure you were alright. He seemed to be doing a fairly good job as well because your confidence was rather stable for a while.

One of the main reasons he’d always check up on you was because he was really slow on picking up when you did feel insecure. You were the kind of person to sit quietly and deal with your issues by yourself rather than reach out for help so that made it slightly difficult for him sometimes. Along with being slow at noticing, Aomine was often one to take things for granted. So when you seemed to be all happy and confident, he’d slowly begin checking up on you lesser and lesser.

You never realised how much you valued the attention from him though until it began to reduce. You seemed to have become emotionally dependent on Aomine and by the time you realised it, it was a little too late.

Slowly, as days went by, you began to feel more and more unsure about yourself as Aomine got busier. The Winter Cup was just around the corner and he was caught up with practices that he didn’t have as much time to tend to you. Nevertheless, he still went out of his way to call you up or visit you during his free time, though that time was never enough for you to open up about how you felt.

You weren’t sure when it happened, but before you knew it, your mind was clouded with dark thoughts that criticised your appearance and abilities. You’d often stand in front of the mirror and pick yourself apart piece by piece, feeling nothing but hatred towards the person that looked back at you.

You stopped enjoying the things you’d normally enjoy too. Things like art and reading became a burden as every time you’d pick up a pencil, you’d hate every stroke you made, and you couldn’t immerse yourself into books anymore because your mind would only just wander off into thoughts about the things you wanted to escape.

“Hey babe, how are you doing today?” Aomine said when you picked up his phone call one evening.

“I’m okay, are you heading back from practice?” you asked, able to hear a faint sound of footsteps in the background.

“Yep. I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever,” he sighed.

“Didn’t you see me in school today?” You pointed out.

“Barely. Besides, that was hours ago. I miss you,” Aomine said.

“I miss you too,” you replied, hearing his voice somehow put a small smile on your face.

“Can we FaceTime instead? I want to see you,” he requested, which immediately wiped the smile away.

“I don’t think so,” you said, shaking your head even though he couldn’t see you.

“Why not? You can’t just keep that pretty face to yourself, you know. It’s not fair.”

“I look anything but pretty, trust me,” you said, playing it off as a joke even though you actually meant it.

“Oh come on. Please?”

“I said no, Daiki,” you snapped suddenly, shocking both you and Aomine. You definitely didn’t want to put yourself on video, however you didn’t realise how defensive you were about it until that point. But you stood by it.

There was a moment of silence as you took in what just happened before Aomine let out a heavy sigh. “Alright. It’s fine then I guess,” he said. There was definitely a change in his tone after that. What was previously an energetic and happy sound, was now more lukewarm and mellow, and you couldn’t help but feel responsible for it.

And now there was one more thing for you to beat yourself up over.

Aomine finally had a few days off of practice, and of course, the first thing he wanted to do was spend time with you. So he called you up.

“Hey, do you want to go out for a movie or something? I finally have some free time,” Aomine asked you.

“Um, I’m not sure. I don’t think I feel too well,” you said. The last place you wanted to go was outside. You had to walk to the convenience store the other day and you absolutely hated it because you felt like everyone was judging you in some way or the other, even though in reality, no one really looked at you for more than a second.

“Really? Is everything okay? Do you need to go to the doctor?”

“No, it’s nothing like that. I guess I’m just not feeling up to it,” you said.

“Then how about we do something tomorrow?” he suggested.

“I don’t know...”

“Y/N, I barely get to see you anymore. Are you sure you’re not avoiding me or something?” Aomine questioned, being more straightforward not to mask his hurt.

“I’m not.”

“Then why don’t you want to spend time with me?”

“I don’t know,” you mumbled, feeling overwhelmed at the pressure you felt to not make him hate you even more.

“Y/N, that’s not an answer,” he sighed.

You responded with silence as you finally decided to shut yourself up before you made things worse. With one more disappointed sigh, Aomine ended the call. The sound of the ringing finally caused you to break down into tears. You finally reached rock bottom. You chased away the one person who actually cared about you. He probably hates you now too.

Meanwhile, Aomine was striding towards your house after ending the phone call. It may have been a bit cruel to just cut it without saying a goodbye, but the frustration just took over. You weren’t even responding at that point so Aomine just decided to see what was wrong for himself. It took you a while to answer the door, and when you did, there was a forced smile on your tear stained face as you let him in.

“I’m sorry for cutting the call short. What’s wrong, Y/N?” he asked.

No response. You just stared at the floor.

Aomine’s hand reached for your cheek, “Hey, were you crying—“

He stopped when you flinched and shifted away before he could lay a finger on you. “I’m fine, it’s nothing,” you said coldly, wrapping your arms around your body and clenching your shirt.

“You won’t even let me touch you. Did I do something wrong?” Aomine asked, trying to think about whether or not he’d done anything to upset you recently. However, nothing added up as he barely saw you— there was no way he could’ve done anything.

You hated every moment of this. All you could think about was how you probably looked awful at that moment. He came so suddenly that you didn’t get a chance to fix yourself. Furthermore, you’d just been crying so you probably looked like a train wreck. He is definitely thinking about how bad I look, you thought. You didn’t want to find out though, so you just avoided all eye contact.

“You’re really not going to even talk to me?” Aomine asked, and as he expected there was yet again no response. He sighed. “Fine then. I’m not leaving your house until you tell me what’s going on.”

You watched as Aomine walked further into your house. He went straight into the kitchen, and you, not knowing what else to do, trailed behind him as he began to check the cabinets.

“I’m starving. Have you eaten lunch yet?” Aomine turned his head to look over at you. You shook your head. “Alright. I’ve been learning how to cook. I’m not guaranteeing a gourmet meal, but it should be edible... hopefully,” he said, beginning to pull out different ingredients.

“I’m not hungry,” you mumbled.

“Did you eat breakfast?”

“No.”

“Yeah I thought so. I’m making us some food,” he said dismissively.

You knew Aomine was stubborn so you didn’t try to argue any more because he’d make it no matter what you say.

You watched him walk up and down the kitchen and do his thing in silence. You really weren’t sure what he was trying to make. There were so many different ingredients that just didn’t make sense, but you just stood and watched.

About half an hour went by without a word from either of you. Aomine began humming a song as he stood over the stove, which strangely made you feel more at ease. As he stirred the pot, he seemed so harmless that you began to finally calm down and build up the courage to tell him.

Almost as if he could read your mind, he finally spoke up, “You ready to say something to me yet?

Another moment of silence passed by as you bit your lip in hesitation. Aomine was just about to let out another disappointed sigh when you muttered, “I’ve just been feeling really insecure lately.”

Hearing your voice caught Aomine off guard for a moment. Even though he was the one who asked you to speak up, a part of him was expecting nothing to happen yet again. He switched off the stove, wiped his hands and turned to face you, leaning against the counter as he did so. “Insecure? About what?”

“I don’t know. I just hate how I look. And everything I do feels so inadequate. Plus I haven’t gotten to see you in a while so I got the feeling that you probably hate me by now. I’m acting like a brat now, after all,” you said, voice soft but the pain was evident.

“I want to start off by saying, I could never hate you. You’re always on my mind Y/N. Why do you think I like to call you so much? Actually, why do you think I came all the way over here? It’s because I care about you,” he said.

You finally looked up at him again. He looked as gorgeous as ever. And this dark blue eyes were gentle and caring. Maybe you were overthinking it.

Aomine took you getting your eyes off the floor as a good sign. So he took a few steps closer to you. “And I get how you feel about the other stuff. I feel like that too sometimes. But honestly, I find you absolutely beautiful. I really don’t know how much weight my words have, but that’s what I think. You’re also so smart and talented, I really just think you need to be a little kinder to yourself,” he continued.

And just like that, the waterworks went for round two. You didn’t know how much you needed to hear those words until right then.

Aomine felt his heart ache at the sight of you in this state. He hesitated for a moment because of what happened when he tried to touch you earlier, but he soon wrapped his arms around you and hugged you tight. Almost immediately, you too wrapped your arms around him and sobbed into his chest, the smell of his cologne making you feel safe at your most vulnerable moment.

“I’m so sorry for being so distant. I’ve been so awful. I should’ve talked to you,” you cried. It was a bit difficult for Aomine to understand what you were saying through the tears but he processed it a few moments later as his fingers brushed through your hair reassuringly.

“Shh, it’s okay,” he said softly as he pulled away and held your shoulders so he could look you in the eye. “I’m just glad you told me.”

You nodded as you tried to stop yourself from crying.

“Here,” Aomine said, as he pulled off the black dog tag necklace he wore and put it around your neck. “It’s not much, but think of it as a reminder that you’re always amazing in my eyes.”

You felt your heart burst as you became teary-eyed again, except this time it was out of gratefulness.

“...is that too lame?” Aomine asked as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly when you didn’t say anything.

You immediately shook your head. “No, it means a lot. I-I love you.”

A smile spread across Aomine’s face. “I love you too, Y/N,” he said. “Alright, I’m gonna finish making our food, okay?”

“Sure,” you nodded as you watched him return to the stove. “But, can I ask what exactly you’re trying to make?”

“Um, ramen?”

You began to giggle, “Babe, I don’t think you should put tomato sauce in ramen.”

“Oh, right... I knew that.”

#kuroko no basket #kurokos basketball #kuroko no basket x reader #aomine daiki #aomine daiki x reader #kise ryouta #kise ryota x reader #knb #generation of miracles

[passionate-hedgehog]

Sequins and Handcuffs

Pairing: Damien Haas x Reader (fem)

Warnings:Languages and mildly suggestive content (a joke between friends, nothing happens lol. Ya girl is ace and writing that freaks me out. Ick.)

Word Count: 1117

A/N: I’m so glad I started this prompt fic series. It’s my way of journaling and it’s more therapeutic than I thought. I’ve spent the last year trying to bury emotions but I’m working on finding them again so my writing gets better. In the meantime, enjoy my robotic nature. ALSO----> If you have fic req’s that you want, send them to MEEEEEE!!!! I’ll write for more than SMOSH. I’m just doing SMOSH only because I feel like these are making a miniseries at this point lol ♥

Summary: Reader is preparing for a visit from her two best friend’s from back home and is ridiculously excited. Damien is interested, too, but for a whole different reason.

The table that Y/n was sitting at in the costume corner was shaking in rhythm to her leg. The container of purple sequins that Rochelle had collected to add to Sarah’s dress nearly crashed to the floor before the designer caught them. The woman put them back in their spot before tapping Y/n’s leg twice.

“If you don’t stop, you’re going to jostle the whole building down. You better get it together before your excitement ruins your stomach for the day. You know how you get.” Rochelle went back to sticking pins into the mannequin. 

Y/n tapped the tips of her fingers along the wood in place of bouncing her legs. The costume designer would have sworn that the other woman could have dented the table by the sheer force of her movements. 

“For the love of- Go run a lap or something. Better yet!” Rochelle grabbed a toolbox from the shelf holding bundled fabric and an assortment of scissors. “Go run this to Sarah for me? She wanted to borrow some things for a project. Maybe if you crabwalk, you’ll run out all of that energy.”

“Yes, Mom.” Y/n mumbled, dodging a ball of twine that had been thrown at her head.

----------

The producer was found standing behind a camera during a Try Not To Laugh Shoot. Y/n stood quietly in the corner and watched the antics of the cast. She found it particularly difficult to stay quiet when Jackie rolled around on the floor whining in a blue dress but absolutely lost it when Noah found himself stuck to Jackie’s stool. When Damien came out from behind the screen, she rolled her eyes and smirked. Of course the man would know how to get someone out of locked handcuffs.

After the shoot wrapped, Y/n approached the producer to finish the task she was given. “Hey, Sarah. Rochelle said to give you this toolbox?”

“Oh. yes! Score! I have some pillowcases I want to repurpose but I’m missing some things. I still gotta get Claudio’s head measurement...Tell her thank you when you go back. I’m SO EXCITED.” The producere shimmied with the box held up next to her face. “Tonight is gonna rock! Speaking of…”

“Nope. That’s my cue. Gotta jet!” Y/n turned tail and ducked out of the studio as quick as she could. When she made it back to the costume corner she found the door was locked. A sign that read “Y/n, you’re banished until after my Zoom luncheon. Run more laps. Chase a squirrel. Do SOMETHING that’s not destructive. Thanks, bby.” was taped on the locked door.

“Well, that’s harsh.” A man’s voice rang, right next to her left ear.

“God freaking dammit, Damien Christian Haas. I swear to-”

“You just did.”

Y/n  took the hand she had frantically placed over her heart and used it to swat at the man’s baseball cap. “I’m so close to fighting you. I don’t think you understand.”

“Yikes. So, what did you do to get banished from ‘Ye Ol Cloth Abundance’?”

“Ye Ol...the fuck…” The woman shook the words from her head. “I...might have been a disturbance...possibly destructive…”

Damien fake gasped. “You? A disturbance? AND destructive?”

“I said ‘possibly’, Dames. Possibly.”  

He smiled a toothy smile. “Yeah, that’s going to be an issue.”

Y/n cocked an eyebrow, thoroughly confused. “What? What’s going to be an issue?”

“Uh...nothing. I have to get something from the break room. Wanna join since you can’t get in there?” The actor pointed towards the offending sign on the door.

“Yeah, sure.” She agreed and they turned to begin their trek.

“So, what made you distracted enough to be a disturbance?”

“My two best friends from back home are coming to visit and I can’t freaking wait!” Y/n started bouncing through the next few steps. “I haven’t seen them in years. We had some time apart because of life and everything. But when we separately joined a forum for cat owners, we clicked all over again.I didn’t even know either of them were in it until I saw them talking to each other over the comments section. It was like we were never even apart.”

“Oh man, that’s a solid friendship right there. I’d be super jealous if I didn’t have Shayne.” Damien finished with a smirk similar to the one Y/n held after the TNTL filming.

Y/n jokingly nudged her elbow into Damien, The man, in turn, smoothly linked their arms together and then ran his hand down her wrist to lace her fingers with his. He slowly pulled her to a stop when they were in a quiet corner in the hallway.

“Do I get to meet them when they visit?”

“Of course! I’m going to introduce them to as many people as I can! They’re my babies. Of course I’m going to show them off.” The woman giggled.

Damien seemed to be thinking through his next words. “Yes, but what version of me are you introducing to them?”

Y/n shook her head. “I don’t...the human...one?”

“I mean like the co-worker version of me? Or the version of me that’s holding your hand in this quiet corner of the hallway?” He held up their hands as if to show proof to her that they were indeed linked.

After blowing out some air and making noises that made no sense, Y/n pulled her hand back and pointed down the hall. “Ya know what? I’m suddenly overtaken by a hunger that only Jackie and a coffee can fix.”

“You’re going to ask her for advice, aren’t you?” The actor called after her, since she retreated quickly.

“You don’t know my life!” Y/n pulled out her cellular device and opened a text as she briskly escaped the scene.

Y/n: Pree, Nat, if I perish from unsettled “romantic” sticky-situations before you get here, please feed my cat.

Nat: Did...did you mean to word it that way?

Pree: I’m sorry if you WHAT????

Y/N: NO THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT. HOLY BANANAS. I meant like...a situation I don’t necessarily want to be in...but don’t want to not be in. 

Y/N: Ja feel?

Pree: No. Ja totally don’t feel.

Nat: Sweetie, I think you need to use more words.

Y/N: It’s a stupid boy thing about a stupid boy.

Nat: Like how stupid?

Pree: Yeah like my son’s father stupid or like Nat’s husband stupid?

Nat: Excuse me what? I love my husband, even if he is sometimes stupid. Bless his heart.

Y/N: Okay yeah, Nat’s husband stupid.

Pree: O.o

Nat: ?!?!?!?!?!

Y/N: help.

#smosh #smosh fan fiction #smosh fanfic #damien haas x reader #damien haas #that ep of tntl killed me #jackie is pure talent #her whole self #just fucking talent #reader insert #but i think i inserted myself instead #god whoops #im sorry

[elviraaxen]

Chrompoised - a retrospective, if you will

Hello I am back from instagram I'm gonna post more here now. I just wanna blabber abt my life and I'm on mobile so please excuse me not being able to add a "read more" 😃

Last time I was here for reals for reals I was like 21-22 really mentally ill and studying biology and then worked as a substitute teacher for a bit because I quit school due to my health being too bad.

Now I'm 25, went to art school and graduated, and have been diagnosed with adhd, I've been confirmed autistic, and I'm on meds, which is super cool 👍✨ really getting used to that Adult Mature Brain! Really wish I could've used it earlier lol.

I'm mostly writing this because I had a minor break down just now because I was looking through my old convos that I had with people in 2016-2017 on here, and I realized that I don't remember a single person, conversation or who I even was (seriously, my opinions man 😵)! That was scary and I've realized that it's one of the worst parts of my adhd, my memory is absolutely garbage, my emotional dysregulation is really bad some days, and I'm really sorry to anyone whose conversations or usernames I've forgotten because my brain just decided that "nope this is not useful" and discarded. And those people who I've randomly lashed out on because that day I was being particularly angry over something minor. I honestly feel really mean. If I could I would try to reach out again but it's literally been years and I have too much anxiety regarding rekindling my old memories because it makes me realize how much I've forgotten. Which is probably about 90% of everything that wasn't extremely memorable. Like, biology? What was that? I don't even remember my classmates names 😃

...

Another discovery I've made about myself is how I always seemed(maybe still do idk) to end up leaving friend groups and stuff like servers, because my brain would make up reasons to leave due to me having REALLY bad rejection sensitive dysphoria (adhd-related). It was rarely the other party's fault, and I've probably left up to 5 separate discord servers on different occasions because my dysphoria made it so bad that I had to pull out of everything so that "they wouldn't have the chance to kick me out first". The same thing would happen to closer friendships, where I would make up a reason to leave them, because my brain was convinced that they were secretly plotting to hurt me, and so we (as in my brain and I) had to run NOW before it was too late. Like yikes, I had no idea that was such a prevalent and destructive part of my life until maybe a few months ago! Really wish I knew that earlier so that I didn't burn so many bridges. I would probably still be friends with more than one or two people from the voltron fandom if I knew that about myself back then 😅 but oh well. It's been like 3 years, so it would be weird of me to just pop by like "hi. Sorry for being a pissy baby I'm neurodivergent 🥺 surprise!"

...

Idk i feel awfully nostalgic in the worst way today, probably because it's new years eve and I'm alone due to Covid (by choice, mind you), and I miss my friends. I haven't seen them since this summer when Covid wasn't as bad where I lived. And this app is making me think back on the person I was 4 years ago when I was questioning my will to live, and who I've developed into today and that all I can think about is how fun it is to make art and learn about art and how much more potential I have now that I'm medicated!!

Like happy fucking new year's y'all. what a ride. I have no idea what this post was. I love you, brush 2020 off your shoulders, and see you tomorrow for 2021 ok? Ok bye ❤️

[marlahey]

@rochey1010​ going back and forth in long-winded replies seems like unnecessary effort for both of us so I hope you don’t mind another text post as I fully articulate my thoughts. as I’ve said before, you’re obviously entitled to your own opinions, but you’ve now seemed to make a lot of assumptions about me a fan/viewer/general consumer of media that I feel like I should clear up. you’ve also made some further claims about the show I’d like to pick up for discussion. If you want to speak further please feel free to respond but of course don’t feel obligated. This’ll be the last public post/reply I make and we can go back to ignoring each other in the tags!

Well i love Eliott/Lola's friendship and i have an upcoming post on that as i said in other posts. I love lola too but i'm sorry i didn't just start watching this show because lola was invented and there's a w/w love story. I've been here for seasons and carried over from OG. I have investment in eliott for personal reasons (mental health) and elu because duh. Their stories have been long running too as i said. And you don't have to be a main to set up a plot/arc. The things between them have been set up since S3 with minute par minute talk, S4 and Idriss, S5 and the cheating perspective, and now S6 and Lola friendship. That is intentional. Do you think it's a coincidence that Lucas talked about pansexuality and eliott having more choice in S5 and suddenly Eliott has a friendship with a girl. That lucas abandonment issues haven't been resolved and are now coming to the forefront because of this friendship? That max has stated that Eliott feels he can save someone from a darkness he himself went through, that eliott himself was sorta saved from the shadows by Lucas. That neils/david specifically stated that this character can help someone even though he has bipolar disorder. That with Eliott's arc there is a focus on his SKAM. That we now have new info about it serving the season. If you understand writing. These things aren't put there for fun. They are there to imply/hint/foreshadow events actions to come. That there is a character now on the show with Lola basically female eliott. Do you think these are all coincidences. This plot we are seeing has slowly been set up not just since S3 but actually heavily developed starting in S5. And that if you now go back and watch S5 you see our main players being set up for this plot e.g  dasille relationship, daphne's ED, Eliott and his individuality, Elu trust/insecurity issues, Eliott's art and it tying into seasonal themes, Lola herself and her outlier persona etc. I don't know whether you are but there are many fans have migrated over from espana just for this season. But you have to understand there is a long term fanbase here that love Eliott, are invested in him and have been waiting for more of his insight. We are now getting that and we will talk about him. He's a hugely popular character as is Lucas and their love. I love both and i will talk about both. Sometimes i won't talk much About lola and talk more about eliott, sometimes i'll connect them and discuss their relationship, sometimes i'll make a post about just about lola, daphne, tiff, benny, movie references as i have. But this is my blog and i'll post what i want to post. You don't have to read any of this stuff. The tag is a big place, just scroll by. As for the theories- just theories. And in my theories i believe these characters are going to make mistakes, fail and grow e.g. lola self Destructing again but being her own hero by the end, eliott and lola being dragged down like lucas said but showing the strength of their friendship by the end, lucas being proven right but also proven wrong by the end. Like i said specific dialogue now being used is not just there to fill the script e.g. "and i have lucas. I can't lose this" "i think one of you may bring the other down" and eliott is heading for a rock bottom as is lola. Again just my thoughts. 👍

While I find it odd that you seem to be gatekeeping the skam france fan community, to be clear I have seen the entirety of three iterations: og, france, and austin. I believe I started OG during s2 or 3, and have seen Fr and Aus from the beginning. I’m not as interested in other versions as I’m very familiar with the plots/characters by now. I’m partial to france as a bilingual canadian as it’s nice to exercise that part of my brain; I’ve also studied/lived there briefly and have some very close friends from france so that amplifies my enjoyment. I’m also bisexual, so I also find this ‘only here for lola + w/w’ when you yourself admit to being emotionally invested in the show’s most dominant queer ship dichotomy very awkward.  to be honest, I think many skam’s fandoms tend to fixate on the esak ship and their season. friends have seen other iterations and confirmed this for me. it happened with elu as expected so I was really unsurprised when maya was introduced and fandom immediately put a lot of their investment into shipping two characters of the same gender. nearly every fandom in general does this: teen wolf, glee, supernatural to name a few – even harry potter. I’m not really a fan of the romantic subplot in lola’s season. she is not elliot 2.0 for so many reasons; she’s her own person and she doesn’t need a romantic partner to be a compelling character with a compelling story. that being said, I liked elu’s season. I particularly love maxence’s elliot; he’s my favourite even. I was thrilled to see him onscreen however briefly after S3 every time he appeared. now he’s finally his own person outside of his relationship with lucas and I couldn’t be more pleased to see that.  I’m not sure how idriss and elliot reconnecting after the attempted kiss falling out plays into lucas’ insecurity or their relationship. it’s perhaps a reminder of his bipolar disorder or the fact that he clearly had friends/relationships before lucas, but I’m not sure how it’s relevant to the season at hand. the biphobia discussion with arthur preceeding lola’s introduction as the new main is not proof that lucas’ supposed abandonment issues are founded in any way, or that he even still has them when we meet her. by insisting on it, you’re perpetuating the harmful idea that any bi or pan person will be tempted to cheat or leave (physically or emotionally) when presented with literally any person whose gender opposes their current partner. this is something that skam fr had literally left unaddressed for so long even with representation in alexia and elliot, and I was so thrilled when it finally came up. it’s very uncomfortable that you’re now using that important conversation as apparent proof that lucas will be abandoned or betrayed, inadvertently or not, by his pansexual boyfriend. I know that daphné was meant to be s6′s main and skam fr wasn’t given the rights by og’s creator. so it makes sense that she/her relationship/struggles feature heavily in her sister’s season. I’m personally thrilled cause I love her and lula is a wonderful actress. that being said, not everything is foreshadowing. not every single interaction or conversation will return to further plot or character. sometimes storylines are just resolved or dropped and awareness raised is just awareness raised. sometimes it’s wonderful and sometimes less so. I understand writing. I’m saying this as a literal former english teacher (ignoring capitalization for aesthetic lol) and assistant in film/tv post-production with an MA in media studies. “Lucas, you have nothing to worry about, it’s not like that between us.” “I know, he explained it to me.”  I’m not sure how much clearer the literal show can be about this issue. spoiler or not, it’s been made abundantly clear that lola and elliot are not romantically involved. even more importantly and I’ve said this on my blog before, you’re allowed to have intimacy with someone without forcing it into a defined familial or romantic relationship. it doesn’t mean that someone’s partner should necessarily feel threatened or abandoned and says a lot more about that person’s insecurity than either individual in the friendship. we’ve also already discussed how much I dislike this turn for lucas’ character as elliot’s apparent MH saviour so it’s not worth repeating again. as for elliot saving lola, well he literally did that already. I’m not sure what you mean by lucas ‘being proven right and proven wrong’ by the end, but you’re obviously adamant that something will happen. I have also seen maxence’s interview a few times. I’ll not argue with the ‘lucas saved elliot from that shadow’ because it literally came from the actor’s mouth, but maxence doesn’t say he can save anyone else from their struggles, but help them and I think that’s a really important distinction. this whole saving idea doesn’t seem healthy at all, especially as lola and elliot grapple with their mental health. it seems like people want to see a ‘rock bottom’ (whatever that means) for them both and it makes me a little uncomfortable. addiction and MH struggles should not have to reach a breaking point in order to be considered resolved or cathartic; they don’t even have to be resolved, because they’re not a plot device. they’re a reality for so many people. the show does a good job of not romanticizing them but some of the things I see in the tag are just... yikes.  as for his ‘dark’ side and the less than happy elu moments, I’d argue that maxence may have meant literally punching out what’s his face to save lola and the subsequent argument(s) with lucas, since that interview came out just before ep 4. but there’s still several eps to go so I could be totally wrong. who knows. it’s your right to theorize on your own blog of course and it’s not my intention to be mean. I’m just trying to further the discourse in a respectful way. I do feel that you may put a little too much stock in what’s literally said/seen and assuming a lot in the unseen gaps, rather than considering a broader context. to wrap up though, lucas is free to have this (however hurtful) fear, just as you’re free to believe it’ll for sure come to pass.  I dread seeing either lola or elliot spiral out, but as 2020 has taught me, I very rarely get what I want lol. thank you @cakepleasee for helping me sort out my thoughts!

#skam france #skam fr #elu #lola lecomte #elliot demaury #whew this is a whole ass novel

[currentlyreadingmanga]

Toilet-bound Hanako-kun Chapter 20: Mitsuba (Part 3)

Previously: the feels came and hit me like a train. Mitsuba’s story was heartbreaking and I wanted nothing more than give him all the nice things he deserves and never got to experience ;; We also had another chapter of Kou being a Very Good Boy ™ and their friendship made me smile so much…...well, until he arrived…...and that happened…….and the angst also hit me like a train. Oh yeah, we also had some great exposition regarding plot-related stuff which made me ask a lot of question (but that’s not new with me lol). Hanako is coming to the scene right now and I’m :)) scared :))))

Now onto the next chapter!

Guess who’s really late again??? I really have no excuse other than me having a really bad attention span (also A3! has taken over my life pls send help)

Anyway!

Oh wow, this cover page has A Lot to disect.. The main thing my eyes were drawn to is Hanako’s expression and the fact that he’s holding the bloodied knife. He looks shocked and sad, and he’s gonna go face his brother (that he killed) and I’m terrified ahhhhh Another thing! The ropes that are tying them together: now, from what I see, the ropes are tying all of them up except for Kou; like, the main connection I always associate with Yashiro and Hanako is their bond, but then the connection between Hanako and Mitsuba is that they’re both dead. It looks like all the ropes are interconnected though and I...I don’t like the implications that my brain is coming up with right now………...Yashiro baby please be safe, okay? Like, it could also mean that Mitsuba is gonna form some sort of bond with Hanako, but let’s be real, what would bring the biggest amount of angst? Exactly. From what I’ve seen so far, the covers have elements that are relevant to the plot and I feel like there’s a lot of things here that could be concerning :))))

Ahhhh okay let’s keep going

So we’re back with Not-Hanako and Kou after Sakura changed Mitsuba’s rumor and turned him into THAT. And you guys remember how I mentioned that it unsettles me when Hanako smiles creepily and his eyes turn dark? Well

I’m incredibly unsettled right now.

Okay so Mitsuba’s wish was too vague for Not-Hanako to turn him into something more than a “half-done supernatural”. He didn’t know what he wanted to do but he knew that he wanted people to remember him. But thanks to Kou, now he knows his actual wish: friends. Mitsuba just wants to stay with his friends and oh, can you hear that???? that’s the sound of my heart breaking (again).

Kou is understadably pissed but Not-Hanako is ignoring him, and he mentions that the more people Mitsuba gets to remember him, the longer he will be able to stay there. And yeah, it checks out with what we know about supernaturals since Tsuchigomori mentioned that it’s easier for him since he can spread his own rumors.

Oh………...oh no………...Mitsuba baby no pls  (;;⚆_⚆)

Yeah, this ties to what he said before about “if that’s enought to break the world then it’s better off broken”. It seems like he just wants everyone to let go of their morals and see where that lead them. Also “the price of this wish is your mind”, does he mean like, his conciousness? his ability to discern right from wrong? Because if he can strip him from that with just his touch (and the rumors) then that’s horrible. Well, I guess that’s what happened with Yako and the Mokke, right? They started killing/stealing/kidnapping people after their rumors changed. 

(ﾟдﾟ；)  Σ(ﾟДﾟ|||) OMFG THAT’S TERRIFYING MAKE IT STOP

oh no, oh no, he’s grabbing Kou and it seems like he’s choking him oh no Mitsuba baby please, I know you’re still there, come on, the power of friendship ™ can bring you back pls

Aw, Kou, sweetie, you weren’t wrong. You gave Mitsuba a good memory and the friend he had always wanted, it’s not your fault that this little shit fucked everything up.

Ahhhhh Hanako is finally here! Oh geez, he cut Mitsuba clean in half ;; But like, he should be fine, right? He also stabbed Yako and she was okay. So Mitsuba should return to his previous form…….right? Please? (;;⚆.⚆)

I really need Not-Hanako to stop being cute, I’m trying to be mad and he unsettles me

!!!!! We finally have a name!!!! I can’t stop calling him Not-Hanako, bless

Awww baby, Hanako is shaking so much :cccc This looks like it’s so hard for him, oh dear

“Back when you killed me” ………………………...ok so that makes it sound like he pushed Hanako to do it, at least in some way………….those wounds and bruises and…..rope marks…….little Amane had when he was alive really aren’t looking good under this lense, I don’t li k e t h i s 

(ﾟдﾟ；) (ﾟдﾟ；) (ﾟдﾟ；) fucking hell, that’s just. yikes. Like, Amane seemed like such a sweet kid, you really have to wonder what was it that made him finally snap, especially in such a way

It really looks like he’s just teasing him even though Amane clearly finds the whole event (and even his brother’s mere presence) traumatizing. It’s weird, Tsukasa seems like he’s doing all this on purpose but he also doesn’t realize that it doesn’t make his brother happy. It has the complete opposite effect, in fact. Even the way he’s standing on his tiptoes, it can just be a cute habit but it also makes him tower slightly over Amane.

Sigh okay, he’s gone, thank you. But!!! Kou is calling out to Mitsuba!! Is he okay??

…………………….oh no. His face says it all, he can’t, he wants to but he can’t

(TдT)(TдT)(TдT) this is so fucking sad. This poor child just wanted a happy (after)life with his friends and he tried, he tried so hard, but every time his chances was snuffed out.

“...we have have no future”

Hmmm…...the way that he’s wording this and what he said during the young exorcist arc gives me the idea that he actually doesn’t like being a supernatural, he thinks there’s really no point to existing after death since he doesn’t grow old nor he can pursue his old dreams. But he HAS to do it; he hates it, but he has a mission so that he can repent for his sins, and his sense of obligation is strong enough that he pleaded for his “life” to Teru, knowing that, in his own eyes, he shouldn’t be here in the first place, And he really did thought that Kou could help Mitsuba in a kinder way so that the ghost would be able to pass on happy but it backfired spectacularly. Living on after you die seems like a truly heart-rending existence.

And there’s only the camera left behind…...No, this-this is fine, I’m fine, this is……. (ಥ﹏ಥ)

Oh dear, and now Kou is blaming himself for not being stronger, strong like his brother, strong enough to save Mitsuba. I should have seen it coming, considering we know very well how Kou views his brother as a kind of ideal and, in turn, views himself as not good enough, but it still hurts. And I know it’s because he’s grieving, but he really shouldn’t do this to himself right now.

“I’m pretty sure destruction is the only salvation for the dead.” At first I thought this was a contradiction to what he had said before (about himself) but it really isn’t. He thinks it’s best when the dead are able to disappear from this world, but he doesn’t want salvation for himself, he wants an opportunity to atone. And I wonder if because of that, he sees himself as someone who’s past salvation.

I’m glad that Kou immediately cuts him off and says that’s ridiculous. Because even if Kou is saying it for Mitsuba, I’m pretty sure Hanako also needed to hear that.

Also, it looks like this is the beginning of a very strong grudge against Tsukasa on Kou’s part and I get it but also I’m :))) scared :)))

I mean, I think he’s got a point there. Yeah, the world has rules that the average people can’t change but he has a power not many others (?) have, so him being able to change things in regards to supernaturals doesn’t seem out of the question.

AHHHHHHHHHHH HE FOUND HIS PICTURE

(ಥ﹏ಥ) (ಥ﹏ಥ) (ಥ﹏ಥ)   take a shot every time I wanted to cry during this chapter

Oh!!! we’re at sea with the mermaid and her people! Mr pufferfish died but the other fish survived so he reported back to her.

Oh. So she really did have good intentions by trying to kidnap Yashiro. Not the best method, but her heart was in the right place. BUT ALSO!!! I’m now even more worried about my girl :)))))))) please don’t let anything happen to her ;;

PFFFFFFFFFFFFT why is this me with A3! omfg Yashiro sweetie we could totally bond over mobile games 

Yashiro was summoned by an upperclassman?? Who-oh, wait

Of course, of-fucking-course, hi Natsuhiko, please don’t endanger my daughter, she’s done nothing wrong. 

And that was the end of the chapter. It felt shorter than usual but also incredibly long because it was emotionally taxing ;; that was such a rollercoaster, oh dear

Ohhhhh there’s extras this time around!!

Awwwwwww the ten-times game panels are so precious ;u; especially the parallel between Kou-Teru and Kou-Hanako. The character sheets with the little bits of info are pretty cute as well!

Judging by the preview of the next volume, it seems like Yashiro is gonna have a tea party with the chaotic trio (Sakura doesn’t seem chaotic so far but the other two do so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯  sorry not sorry). If they hurt my child istg….

Awwwwwwwwww the middle school entrance pictures are so cute! (Amane’s and Tsukasa’s not so much in context but…...yeah)

#toilet bound hanako kun #jibaku shounen hanako kun #jshk spoilers #tbhk #jshk #live blogging

[toujoursmiraculous]

Ladybug Reaction/Thoughts!

Fair warning, this is a very long post! I absolutely love, love, love that we get to see that flashback of him actually making the lucky charm bracelet, wondering if it’s good enough to give Marinette, actually getting Plagg’s and Nathalie’s opinion. He’s just that worried about making sure it’s good enough for her. Wow I love my sunshine boy. Adrien was literally going to talk about how amazing Marinette is to his father before he cut him off. He was actually starting to do it! Ahhh that makes my heart so happy. “Please father! Marinette deserves to have all her friends there.” Just the fact that he begged him so he could go see her on her special day. sniffs I’m not crying tears of joy! ;~; Oh wow, we never thought about Lila possibly being there in Befana but yikes. “I thought you were supposed to be protecting Adrien from Marinette. The one you said was a bad influence.” Okay, so the disgusting part where Hawk Moth is using this and Marinette to chaos havoc aside, it sounds like Gabriel doesn’t actually believe that Marinette’s a bad influence on Adrien. Which I really appreciate and hope it means something later.

Lila: “Will you keep your promise if I succeed?”

Literally the only reason she gets to model with Adrien at the end. And remember, Adrien can’t refuse to work with her as his father arranged it, so he’s pretty much stuck with this.

Ms. Bustier: “Today someone placed an anonymous note in my mailbox, claiming that you’d stolen the exam answers. And it looks the anonymous person was right.”

Notice even Chloe is just outright shocked?

Yes Alya and Adrien standing up for her! And Rose too. At least at first.

Okay, really, if she fell down that massive flight of stairs, she’d have worse than a injured knee. Just saying. She’d be taken away in an ambulance and instructed not to move in case of neck injuries. C’mon adults, isn’t this a bit suspicious happening at once at this point?

“My daughter is not a thief!”

Just watched Rogercop the other day with a friend, it’s sad and interesting this line is being used again.

Wow. Framed for stealing Lila’s necklace and having it exposed to the entire class. That sucks so much. How embarrassing to have to be in such a situation. Accused of 3 crimes in one day? Psh, overplaying it Lila.

Alix: Angry

Mylene: Disappointed

Alya: Shocked

Sabine: Crying

Adrien: Sad because he knows exactly what’s going on and knows she’s innocent.

“You know I’m innocent, don’t you, Adrien?”

The look of anger on his face as he looks at Lila after she says this. Oh how I love this so much. If this must be done at all, this is what I want to come from it.

You know, it’s really sick. It’s really sick that this sweet boy goes and tells his father about how wonderful his friend is, how her friends love and care about her, and that he cares so much about too, and he uses her, ultimately hurting him, to get what he wants. Adrien’s essentially fueling Hawk Moth without even knowing. How utterly disgusting. My poor baby’s being used in the worst way by his own father.

Chloe protecting Sabrina instead of pushing her in front as a shield to protect herself shows so much character growth, I’m very proud of her.

Verity Queen. Princess Justice.

Does this confirm later their akumatizations? Because oof I’m afraid of Marinette getting akumatized. Especially after she was going to take off her earrings to give to Hawk Moth, had Nathalie not suddenly fallen into a coughing fit!

Okay, I’m going to say this: This today was a good example of why they should know about their identities. Had Adrien known, he would’ve more likely been able to keep her calm enough from being akumatized at all, or if not that, prevent her from giving him the earrings.

I still feel that way right now, the cons of them knowing outweigh the pros, but that is definitely a pro!

Alya being on Marinette’s side, even though it looks bleak and she doesn’t know if she’ll be able to prove her innocence. That’s all I ask is that she believes.

I seriously can’t believe her parents are like, until we find another school for you to go to, you have to work here at the bakery, starting right now.

That’s pretty much believing their daughter was guilty of everything she’s been accused of and that’s so horribly wrong. Okay, she’s not able to go to school right now. That’s out of their control. But you’re going to punish her, too, and prevent her from getting to the bottom of what happened so she’s allowed back at school?

“I want to help you.” “Never at that cost. Never at that cost again.” This just raises the question again at why Emilie wore the Miraculous in the first place, and why she wore it to the point that it put her in the state she’s in now. If Gabriel’s first use of the Butterfly was the Stoneheart episodes, she was using it only on her own. But what is this Miraculous capable of that she was so desperate to use it for, and why was she? Lol @ detective Alya. Too bad the lockers just so happened to be clean right before she got there. :/ True love right there, that Nathalie would very easily give up her life for Gabriel’s (and Adrien’s) happiness. Why can’t she just love someone else? Dx I know she said in Stormy Weather 2 she wonders if she shouldn’t have taken the job, and she’s right. She’s not even allowed to answer her own phone because she’s being punished for something she didn’t even do? Again, wow. “Don’t tell me. We have to go and help your Lady.” I love how Plagg’s annoyed at going to help Ladybug, and Adrien’s response is, “She and I are on the same team, Plagg. We’ll help Marinette.” as if Plagg likes and prefers Marinette over Ladybug. I already figured that, but I like how Adrien was reassuring Plagg he was going to help her. x3 “Chat Noir, I don’t feel so good.” LOL I can’t believe they put this in. XD “There’s something wrong,” HIS VOICE QUIVERED. MY HEART IS NOT OKAY. That’s NOT OKAY. “we’re supposed to be nearly invulnerable.” Wow. So I know that Mayura’s making Sentimonster Ladybug say these things, but two things: One, I feel like this is exactly what Ladybug feels about Chat. “I’ve always gone out of my way to hide my feelings for you.” Bingo! Chat: “I thought you said you loved somebody else?“ Did you guys see that look of shock on Nathalie’s face? Oh gosh. Oh no oh no oh no. Oh no. Oh heck no! Because now, she will give this information to Gabriel, and they’re going to try to figure out who Ladybug does love! And that would be Adrien! asdkjflg this is going to get real. “Your feelings haven’t changed, but mine are growing stronger every day. I can’t keep pretending anymore.” I really do think she’s pretending she doesn’t have any feelings for him, to keep them and everyone else safe. I also get the feeling that some of what Mayura’s saying can be applied to herself and Gabriel too? Okay, Chat was scarily close to having his Miraculous taken. But oh my gosh at Ladybug hurling them apart with that brute force. XD Sentimonster: Listen to your heart! Ladybug: Listen to your brain! Chat wanted to listen to his heart and believe that she really loved him. Oh ugh why must they hurt me so? “OHHH I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR THAT!” Totally laughing, but he wants to believe so much that you love him. :c “I’m sorry, Kitty, but you should have known. I’m nowhere near as perfect as her.” Ouch. “I love you just the way you are, m’lady.” Awwwwww. How could anyone not love these two? Sentimonster Ladybug may in their opinion be perfect, but he’d take imperfect yet authentic Ladybug any day. Sentimonster: gets a massive gun of destruction Ladybug: gets a fork “Okay, you’re definitely the real one!” XD Gabriel: Nooroo, why didn’t you wake me up?! Nooroo: I couldn’t bring myself to, Master, you were sleeping so peacefully! Lol first humor scene with them I think? I like that Ladybug gave the sentimonster her freedom and asked if she could help them. That’s so sad that she got destroyed by Mayura, but her disappearing would’ve been inevitable anyway. Dx Chat just saw some version of Ladybug being taken away from him. Again. And reacts with rage. He’s clearly been traumatized from Desperada and Party Crasher. Whoa dang, Hawk Moth vs Chat Noir. Was not prepared for this. :O “Getting sentimental on a sentimonster?” “You’re the real monster!” “Oh, that. You’ll find out very soon.” Yikes. Chat calling his own dad Grandpa. XD I can’t. I just can’t. Hawk Moth just throwing his own son off a building so cruelly like that. Doesn’t matter that he knows or not, he knows they’re kids. So Ladybug has Mayura in her hands. She could easily have just taken her Miraculous anyway, but there was no way she was going to let her kitty be harmed. “You had Mayura right where you wanted her. I could’ve managed by myself, why’d you do that?!” “Because we’re Ladybug and Chat Noir. Ladybug by itself doesn’t sound half as cool.” “You shouldn’t say things like that to me.” OOF. Then he puckers up, and she puts a finger on his lips and says, “But the real Ladybug’s heart still belongs to someone else.” “Ha, I should have guessed that too.” I love how they’re both smiling throughout the scene. No bad feelings or animosity. And I also love that not once, has she never said “I don’t like you” to Chat. It’s always been “I like someone else.” This really means something! I feel like this episode is really foreshadowing Ladynoir stuff. I also find it sweet and sad they’re both attached to Bugette. xD “Your idea was brilliant, but you don’t need a Miraculous to help me.” she sure doesn’t oh no. What’s she going to do next? “There was something else you needed Mayura for. To find the Guardian.“ “I’m not so sure anymore.” Not sure I like where this is going :/ Wait, his name is Giuseppe? I thought it was Vincent! :O Gotta make a note to change some fanfics later..... “Your papa’s new muse is incredible.” THEY’RE GOING TO BE MODELING A LOT TOGETHER OH NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT. DISGUSTING! I can’t believe he’s allowing such a thing! “She’s Italian, just like me!” I have Italian ancestors, why does that matter Giuseppe? She’s a disgrace to all Italians everywhere. Adrien: “Would you mind leaving us alone for a second?” in his normal Adrien voice. As he walks over to the chair, did you hear him grunt out of frustration? Then he just sits down and doesn’t even look at her. Which reminds me of his father. Adrien: “I warned you once already, Lila, but you didn’t listen. You hurt my friend Marinette, and that’s not okay." he says in a deep, angry voice. Yesssss! I’ve wanted this for so long! STAND UP FOR THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. Also, he warned her not to hurt the people he loves. So he’s pretty much admitting he loves her without saying so. Ahahaha I don’t care if he thinks it’s only as friends, he loves her. x3 “I don’t know how to prove you lied Lila, because you’re good at it. So you’ll have to come up with another lie just as convincing. Only this time it’s going to prove Marinette’s innocent.” “Why would I do that?” “Because we’re friends, aren’t we?” Okay, Angry Adrien’s a bit scary but I’m so here for it! I’ve never heard him sounding so cold. You don’t hurt his Marinette. You harm her, you’ll have him to answer to. Again, really disgusted with Marinette’s parents sympathizing and caring about Lila. My mom would’ve seen past her lies and been on my side the entire time. I just don’t see how parents like hers that have always thought so highly of their daughter and know her so well would buy into this. But I suppose that goes to show the kind of power Lila has over everyone. Also is sad that after all this, Marinette is still nice towards Lila. She’s just too good. “As you said. Things aren’t always as they seem to be at first sight.” Hmmmm well this certainly is going to mean some things later. That disgusted look on Marinette’s face when she saw Lila and Adrien’s photos on TV. XD Like she can’t even believe how things keep turning out with this girl. But the way this episode ended, this was so not the end of all of this. As this was supposed to be the last episode before the 2 season finale episodes, I’d bet that it’ll continue then. If not, beginning of S4. Oh my, are we even ready for this?

#ml #miraculous ladybug #miraculous tales of ladybug and cat noir #ml spoilers #ml season 3 spoilers #ladybug #ladybug spoilers #adrien agreste #alya cesaire #marinette dupain-cheng #chat noir #mayura #hawk moth #gabriel agreste #nathalie sancoeur #thoughts #reaction

[sawasta]

ahhh I really neglect this blog but I finished this series!!

I said I'd explain it with the final so I guess I actually will lmao

more under the cut...

So this series is part of my sustained investigation project for AP studio. My investigation is over trauma and this series focuses specifically on the four F’s of traumatic responses (fight- the dog, flight- the bird, fawn- the...fawn, and freeze- the polar bear)

So basically to dive into each painting a little bit:

(I’d recommend googling the four F’s of trauma typology if you want to know more)

The dog represents fight. I chose to make it a dog because dogs can sometimes have a reputation as being aggressive, especially a dog that was raised in a bad environment will be very wary of humans. I felt like it fit, the red background kind of tying into that theme as well. 

The bird represents flight because of the rather obvious and literal translation to a birds ability to fly. I wanted to stick to primary colors as a background theme at this point but I mostly liked the contrast it made. 

The polar bear represents freeze. Polar bears especially spend most of their lives isolated and distanced from other creatures, they also hibernate, both of those things fit well with this typology. The blue kind of adds to the cold atmosphere of it.

The fawn is kind of obvious but it also relates heavily to the idea of vulnerability present in this typology. The green seemed like a good color for it half because when you think of deer you think of forests or grass and also because in my mind it feels vaguely connected to the idea of vulnerability but I think that might just be me lol. 

The nooses are on the fawn and the dog because I see those two as the self destructive typologies, though somewhat opposite in nature, both are to do with tendencies that are very harmful for the person themselves emotionally.

The blindfolds are on the bird and the bear because I see those two as the more escapist typologies. Those typologies are trying to run or hide from the past in some way, effectively making them blind. 

I had originally planned to make this a series of four sculptures but uh... I severely overestimated how much time I had. I have three AP classes (just took my calculus AB exam today, English Literature tomorrow! RIP me) and studio kept moving right along with projects. I had to scrap the sculpture idea after the first one dried out mid sculpt (yikes.) 

I haven’t really been focusing as much on art lately, not giving up on it or anything don’t worry!! I just have been kind of shifting my attention to other things. I’ve had a strong interest in psychology for several years now and I’ve started to become interested in psychiatry. Kind of a rambly personal story for that one but the idea of medical school has been consuming most of my time lately haha. 

I should hopefully have a few other pieces to upload here and there, I’ll try and be more active on here but you know how it is. Hope quarantine is treating you guys well :)