#(or worse: we hear the baby cries followed by toilet flushing)

[anabsolutetrainwreck]

it’s just what we know || h. styles

warnings: dad!harry, talks of pregnancy, slight mention of vomit, talks of kissing

word count: 1.6k

summary: having your second child takes its toll on you and your relationship...

Your daughter was three now. And yet it only felt like yesterday that you’d brought her home from the hospital. She’d certainly tired you and Harry out for a good while after she was born. You both loved Vera unconditionally, so when you discovered you were pregnant again, Harry was worried he’d lose a bit of his love for Vera to give to your new baby. He was scared he didn’t have enough love to share between the three of you.

He’d spend his nights awake, his hands resting on your stomach. Anne had assured him that the love one has for one’s family is never limited. There’s always enough affection to go around. Your own father had said something similar, though it was slightly less poetic.

Your second pregnancy had been far worse than your first. You felt constantly exhausted, dehydrated and sick. It amplified Harry’s guilt immensely. He already felt bad about not being able to love Vera the same as he did when she was an only child, but now you were in pain and there was nothing he could do about it. All he could do was help you sleep comfortably, fetch you water whenever you needed, hold your hair back when you were disposing whatever food you had eaten into the toilet, and provide you with plenty of cuddles.

When your baby boy arrived in June, neither of you were surprised. Your entire family had predicted a boy because Harry had an older sister and you had a younger brother. So, when George Styles arrived, you’d been overjoyed to finally meet him and to have the rough pregnancy over.

Bringing him home, where Vera finally met him, almost solidified the reality that you and Harry had had a second baby. Vera became very obsessed with him very quickly. She would get up early just to come and watch him sleeping soundly. She’d sit and admire as you and Harry took turns in putting him to bed. She hated it when he cried and she hated it when you or Harry got frustrated with him for not stopping. Vera was naturally curious.

At first, it seemed easier than you’d remembered it to be with Vera. However, it quickly became just as stressful. There was nothing as bad as putting in hours upon hours of effort to seemingly get nothing out of it. The constant headaches and heavy eyes were beginning to feel worse than the pregnancy.

You’d always been aware of how tough pregnancy could be. Watching your aunt go through it when you were younger and hearing Anne talk about it when you first revealed you were pregnant with Vera had taught you that much. But you’d never expected it to be this hard.

As of present, you were balancing George on your hip. He was almost nine months old now. He’d found such joy in tugging on your hair and your ears. You tried your very hardest to ignore his actions as you prepared dinner. With only one free hand, it made it incredibly difficult to cook. But it was your only choice. Whenever you put George down, he began crying. And the last thing you needed to hear was more of his crying.

Vera sat at Harry’s piano, pressing her fingers down on random keys, giggling loudly as she went. The tune emitted was far from pleasant. And with the combination of George’s physical torment and Vera’s masterpiece of music, you were nearing your limit.

You’d dealt with them all day. And it was definitely one of those days. To make matters even worse, Vera was going through her daddy’s girl phase. She needed to know where Harry was and when he would be back and she’d only ever do anything if Harry asked her to. As far as she was concerned, you had no authority in her life whatsoever.

Harry had been at the studio all day with Mitch, writing and toying around with the instruments there. There was only so much he could do at home without being interrupted by a clingy Vera Styles. And, as much as you knew how much his music meant to him and his fans, you just wished he’d take a day to look after Vera and George. You were constantly tired, constantly aggravated and constantly stressed. All you wanted was a break.

You heard the front door close. Harry had always slammed the door, it had just been a habit of his. That was until you first had Vera and he learnt that she became easily frightened by the loud bang and it often woke her up. And when she was awake and on edge, she wasn’t going back to sleep. Which, in turn, meant you and Harry didn’t get any sleep either.

You listened silently as Harry hung up his coat and kicked off his shoes. He wandered into the living room. You heard him gasp, “That’s beautiful! You’re so talented!”

It was swiftly followed by Vera’s giggles. She said something to him, something you didn’t quite pick up. You heard his footsteps as he arrived at the threshold of the kitchen. He grinned, “There’s my baby boy!”

You let out a sigh of relief as Harry lifted George from your arms. You smiled to yourself as Harry peppered George’s face in light kisses. He turned to you, “And my gorgeous Y/N.”

He pressed his lips to your forehead, squeezing your hand with his free one. You smiled, “How was Mitch?”

Harry sat himself down at the kitchen table, tickling George as he did so. He shrugged slightly, “He was good. We wrote a great song today, Y/N. Oh, God, you’d have loved it.”

You nodded, “I’m glad you had a great day.”

Perhaps there was an air of bitterness to your tone. But you couldn’t help it anymore. You were just so tired. Besides, Harry didn’t pick up on any traces of sourness, but a part of you almost wanted him to. Maybe then he’d bring you up on it and you could tell him about all your problems.

You felt almost guilty being the person to bring it up; you didn’t want to burden Harry with what you were dealing with. Communication between you and Harry seemed scarce these days. Sure, you’d have a brief catch up in bed, but half the time, you were asleep so quickly the conversation didn’t last all too long. And then the hours between Harry’s arrival home and when you fell asleep was only filled with Vera and George. You knew that’s what parenthood was about, but you just craved some alone time. Harry nodded, “I did. The band is gonna come down tomorrow and we’re gonna play around. You know, see if we can put some music to my lyrics.”

Slowly, you said, “So, you’re going to the studio tomorrow?”

“Yeah. I just have a really great feeling about this song, Y/N. I mean, you really would have loved it.”

“I’m sure I would,” you said, suddenly filled with the urge to cry. “Can you take over for a second?”

You gestured down to the pan you were preparing dinner in. He quickly shot up, much to the glee of little George. You wiped your hands on your trousers and left the kitchen with your head down. Rushing into the bathroom, you let it all out quietly.

You splashed your face with a bit of water in an attempt to wake yourself up a bit. It was only two minutes later that Harry wandered in, ruining your only time alone all day. Upon realising you were upset, he rushed to kneel in front of you, taking your face in his large hands. “Baby, what’s wrong?” he asked, his eyes large and inflated with sympathy.

“Nothing, I’m fine,” you smiled forcefully, kicking yourself internally for that being your default reply whenever you were asked how you were feeling.

“No, please don’t lie.”

“I’m just… just so tired,” you said, feeling lighter already for finally confessing. “I just can’t physically do it on my own. I’m so lonely all day. And I know I’m just being selfish, but I feel like I’m raising them without you. It feels like I never see you anymore.”

“You’re not being selfish, my love. Please, don’t think you’re being selfish for feeling alone. I love you. I love you so much. Okay? I’ll make the effort now, okay? I will. I promise. Please, darling, don’t keep stuff like this to yourself anymore. I need to know. I’ll tell you what, I’ll tell the band to have the day off tomorrow and I’ll stay and look after George and Vera. You can do whatever you want all day, whether that be sleep or go see your parents.”

He never failed to make you smile, with slightly flushed cheeks.

“Are you sure?”

“We shouldn’t even be a big thing. I’m their father, I should just automatically put in as much effort as you,” he said.

You sighed, “Well, yeah, but you are a lot busier than me.”

“I’m never too busy for my three angels. Alright? I love you,” he said softly, kissing you.

It felt as if something within you had reigniting. It felt as if this kind of intimacy had been lost on you and Harry since having kids. And, for a split second, you felt seventeen again. “Thank you,” you whispered, laying your forehead against his.

“Stop thanking me for doing the bare minimum. You know I hate it,” he sighed, leaning into your touch. “Now, come on, before we end up with spaghetti all over the kitchen walls.”

#harry fanfic #harry fanfiction #harry imagine #harry styles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x you #harry imagines #harry styles imagines #harry x y/n #harry x reader #harry x you

[sicjimin]

Could you maybe do a morning sickness taekook: Taehyung knows he’s pregnant but hasn’t told jk yet. Maybe they are getting at dance practice or something and taehyung starts to feel sick but He normally get nauseous easily anyway for jk doesn’t see anything out of the ordinary and just is like “if youre tummy is getting upset we can leave.” (Thought it sounded cute.) and once tae gets sick ge reveals the truth Sorry if doesn’t make sense

A.N : AJSHDJSJDNS THIS IS SO CUTE I LOVE THIS SO MUCH anon ur mind ... i love it. As someone who likes morning sickness a lil bit too much, im having so much fun writing this one. I hope you like it and this one living up to your expectations :D

TW : emeto, graphic descriptions of vomiting, mpreg

Jungkook's birthday is in 3 days.

Taehyung always believes in Angel, and maybe this is one of Angel's ways to give happiness to his and Jungkook's relationship. Taehyung eyes get teary when he sees the positive sign on the test pack and the little USG photo in the maroon box. His hands grazed it slowly before moving to give his stomach a gentle rub. Yes, after keep feeling nauseous for almost a week, having the worst episode of vomiting in the restaurant bathroom with Jimin beside him 3 days ago, it was his breaking point to take a pregnancy test. To have it aligned with Jungkook's birthday is giving it a plus score, he gonna make it as Jungkook's gift.

He didn't know which one that he should be grateful for, the fact that Jungkook is oblivious of how frequent he's gagging on his hand and feeling nauseous in one day—he gets worried, even insisted on taking the older to the doctor, but because it never really turns into vomiting session and Taehyung always said his stomach is upset because of food, the younger grows used and only give him water and soothe him when the wave comes— or the fact that the time nausea becomes unbearable is always when he's not with Jungkook. Either it's on 2 AM —this got him grateful too that Jungkook is a heavy sleeper— or when he's with Jimin. His soulmate has been catching Taehyung harshly vomiting two times, one in their office bathroom stalls when they had recording, and another one when they went out 3 days ago.

Taehyung is itching to tell his husband. The image of having the younger calming him down when he's getting sick and take care of him when nausea crashes him just so tempting. But he needs to be patient, he only needs to hide his sickness for 2 days and after that he will get all the pregnant person privilege from his husband.

---

Taehyung believes that his Angels approved his surprise plan and aligned everything so it works well as he's getting the worst morning sickness episode on September, 1st.

The first one comes in the morning, where he burst into the bathroom while Jungkook was peacefully brushing his teeth. He didn't have it in him to care about the "not getting sick in front of Jungkook" plan as his cheeks were already puffed with murky liquid that urging to come out the moment he woke up. So he runs and harshly opened the lid that immediately followed with a rush of yellow murky liquid that he has been holding back and another fresh stream from his stomach splashing to the water inside. Some of it splatters to the seat as the force was .. quite big. Taehyung has never been a quiet puker.

"Baby what happened? Are you sick?", Jungkook worried voices seeping into Taehyung's ears. He managed to shake his head before his shoulder bent further, almost making his head dive deeper, as another harsh retched bringing his dinner filling the bowl again. He coughs few times as the remnants of rice are stuck on his throat. He lifted his head and gasping for air before wipes his runny nose and lips, then tossing the tissue along with his vomit. That's when Jungkook speaks again, " What do you mean you're not sick? Taehyung-ah, you're clearly vomiting!"

Oh, he's using "Taehyung". he's serious.

"Not Taehyung. That's not my name", Taehyung pout. "And I'm sure i am not sick!", he adds. Jungkook furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, " Huh? explain?"

Taehyung huff, "My name is baby or babe for you! I don't know a Taehyung, and yes I'm sure I'm not sick, maybe this just food poisoning? the bulgogi I ate last night is kinda weird, don't you think so?"

"Huh? but I'm fine? I ate the same bulgogi?"

"Then maybe my immune is shit. Don't worry, baby. I'm fine. If it get worse i will tell you okay? Now just continue to prepare yourself while I finished this. We need to leave for practice in an hour", Taehyung says, positioned himself back facing the bowl.

"You're not done?"

Taehyung body is already jerked forward with an empty gag, before he nauseously answers, "No, more". As it on cue, another liquid rushing from the older lips. Taehyung goes for 2 more rounds of sick until he's empty and manages to let go of the toilet.

The second one comes when they were in practice. It's not a rare sight if BTS's choreo has a lot of jumps and runs and .. moving. Queasy stomach didn't help the situation at all. It was their second time to re-run the chorus part, when suddenly a harsh wave of nausea hits Taehyung, making him stop midway and bent on his waist with one hand cradling his stomach, another clamped his mouth. He squeezed his eyes shut as his breathing becomes quicker, his eyes ringing with loud music that still thumping.

"Taehyung-ah, you're okay?", Hoseok's hands settled on his back, giving it a tap a few times. Taehyung sucked a deep breath as he straighten his body when he's sure enough that he won't spill his stomach content on the floor there, " Yeah, I'm fine hyung. Just a little bit nauseous"

Hoseok nods and yells, "10 minutes break everyone!"

Taehyung dragged his body to the couch, his hand still rubbing his stomach, begging the baby inside of him to stop playing around. He was catching his breath when he feels the other side of the couch dipped.

"Baby, are you okay?"

Maybe his baby recognized their father's voice and protest because they have been kept for too long, a harsh gag suddenly hit him and making Taehyung's body jerked forward, not only once but thrice until he almost considers running the bathroom. He squeezed his eyes shut again and try to control his breathing, finally, the wave lessen. He gulped audibly before opened his mouth, hoping that it would be a word that comes out, not his breakfast, "I'm fine"

Jungkook sighs and plants a quick kiss on his forehead before standing up as Hoseok's voices calling them back echo through the room. Taehyung managed to go through the whole practice without gagging on his hand, but it changed when he stopped moving and rest to catch his breath. He sits beside his husband that also panting with a bottle of water in his hands. It's just silence between them, only loud breathing sounds when another wave of nausea hit Taehyung, breaking the silence with an ugly gag from his throat. This one wave is more persistent as the feeling of gag still lingering behind his throat, making his eyes teary.

Jungkook that has grown used to the sight only place his hand on the older knees, "If your tummy still upset, lets just go home"

Taehyung supposed to giggles when Jungkook called his morning sickness as a mere upset stomach if his body didn't rock with wetter gag—he's sure he's going to throw up.

"I'm going to throw up", Taehyung urgently mumbled under his hand that clamped tightly on his lips before he runs to the bathroom. He almost cries when he sees his lunch morph into a murky liquid mixed with bile in the water below. He's tired. He rubs his stomach gently, " Baby please don't make me too sick"

"What baby?"

Taehyung jumps on the sudden voice. Then he feels another hand rubbing his back, "Are you still feeling sick hm?"

"Mhm", another trickle of bile escaped from Taehyung lips. He groaned softly, " Baby stop this"

"I'm not doing anything though, do you want me to stop rub your back?", Jungkook chime in, absolutely confused. Taehyung manages to let out a laugh before another trickle of vomit spills from his mouth. He spat the last thick saliva hanging on his lips before flushed the toilet and stand up. Jungkook trailed behind him like a puppy, until they reached the practice room.

"Is it really bad Taehyung-ah, are you okay? You need to take the anti-emetic medicine the doctor gave you!", Jimin greeted them with a worried ramble.

"Huh? what doctor?"

Taehyung giggles at his husband's confusion, completely enjoying it. He goes to his bag and grabbed the box and water. His throat burns after all the commotion, "Open this"

Jungkook, still in his confusion phase, opened the box.

"Happy birthday baby"

The younger gasp, "What ... what does this mean? Is this a prank?"

Jimin chimed in from behind, "Yah! what prank? Congrats Jungkook-ie, i can't believe a baby like you gonna be a father"

Taehyung laughs when he sees Jungkook's clueless expression, "So, you're not getting food poisoning or just an upset tummy?"

Taehyung shakes his head, "No dummy, that morning sickness. Do you really think I could get an upset tummy for more than 3 days?"

"Oh god. How far?"

"6 weeks now"

"Yah! Jungkook why are you crying", Jimin laughs from the side while Taehyung frantically wiping the younger cheeks that suddenly brimming with tears, " Baby why are you crying?"

"No, i love you. This is the best gift ever", Jungkook shakily says. He grabbed Taehyung wrist that still busy wiping his tears and pull it closer," Thank you"

Taehyung smile as he hides his face on his husband's shoulder, embracing the soft cologne scents that still emits from his shirt, "Now you're responsible to be with me every time I get sick. I've been sick alone or with Jiminie and that's suck"

Jungkook giggles when he hears Jimin protest, "Yah Taehyung-ah what do you mean i'm suck?!" before he adds, "That's what you deserve for hiding such a thing from me, baby"

#bts sickfic #bts emeto #tw emeto #tw vomit #sick!taehyung #caretaker!jungkook #another mpreg fic

[beauvibaby]

need you - f.andersen

a/n: leave it up to me to write an emotional af Freddie fic at 9 o’clock on a Sunday morning 🙃 ok but honestly a pt.2 for this??? I’d be down to write it if you’d read it

warnings: death of parent, funeral talk, and soft!Freddie (lets be real we need a warning for that)

Word count: 3k

You stared blankly at the screen, the number flashing across your mothers phone, you just got here, it couldn't happen so fast, there’s no way. No one could move, your brother sat beside you already balling his fists, trying to hold back the tears as your mother started calling out for your father, who we all knew was gone now. You finally picked up the phone at the last second, answering before it could go to voicemail. “Is this Mrs. Y/L/N?” The nurse from the hospice center spoke coldly, you’re heart broke, “this is her daughter.” You answered, hands shaking, the words she muttered you didn't think you’d ever forget. “I’m sorry to tell you that Mr. Y/L/N passed at 6:47 this evening.” Her voice was level, you couldn't blame her, she probably made these calls everyday, but still anger coursed through you. Not at her, but at everything, at life, at god. Why would he take your father so soon? He was only 60, far too young to have suffered for over ten years the way he did. “We’re on our way.” You managed to whisper out as your mother clung to you, she screamed your dads name, as if he would appear, as if he would have never left. But, we all knew that wasn't the case. You couldn't bring yourself to cry, as horrible as it sounded, you were almost relieved, that he wouldn't suffer anymore, that you wouldn't have to watch him struggle to walk from one side of the house to the other without losing his breath. The car ride to the hospice center was a long one, despite your sister in law running nearly every red light to get there. Your mom cried the whole time, your brother angrily stared out the window, guilt eating at him for not spending more time with his father before he left. You, you just sat there, sadness rushing through your veins as you still couldn't bring the tears to fall, you watched out the window as the god forsaken building came into view, all that you could hear as you expertly made your way down the hallways were the last words you’re father told you before he was too out of it to communicate. 

“I love you, baby, take care of your brother, okay?” 

“Of course, daddy, I love you too.” 

That was three days ago, the day they told you it was lung cancer, the day you came rushing over from work because the doctor needed to talk to the whole family. The day you called your brother and told him your dad was going to die, the day you went home and cried yourself to sleep on the floor with the dog, who himself was whining, already knowing that his favorite person was never going to come home. Your mind went to Freddie as you walked in, he was away, the hockey season had just started, and you told him your dad wasn't doing good, but you didn't admit to him just how bad, thinking you surely had a couple of weeks left, you knew Freddie would leave in a heartbeat to come be with you, and your mother who he had grown to love almost as much as his own. 

You entered the room, freezing in the doorway as you saw him laid out on the bed, you knew what to expect, you knew what he would look like, you had seen your grandmother like this just a year before, but it made your gut wrench to see your dad so lifeless, the color already leaving his skin. “I’m gonna be sick.” You mumbled, rushing towards the bathroom, your brother tried to follow you to make sure you were okay, but you locked the bathroom door. You heard your mom telling him to let it go, knowing it wouldn't do anything but make it worse for you. You kneeled over the toilet, crying as you emptied your stomach. Instant relief hitting you, but after you flushed it, you sat on the floor, leaning against the wall, sobbing, finally, letting the emotions out. You tearfully pulled your phone out, eyes blurry with water as you shakily dialed Freddie’s number, you knew it was the middle of the game, he wouldn't see this for another hour or two at least, but you needed to tell him now, before the funeral planning got underway. As you figured, the phone call went to voicemail. “Freddie,” you paused, letting out a cry, knowing it was going to kill him, but you couldn't help it, “he’s gone, and, I-I-uh-I need you, please.” You whimpered into the phone hanging up right after. You didn't want to go through personally telling all your friends so as tacky as it might seem, you posted a picture of you and your father from when you were little, writing a simple caption, “heaven gained another angel tonight, love you always daddy” posting it and silencing your phone as you rinsed your mouth, walking out to join your grieving family. Your brother was by the window, his wife draped over his back, as if she could absorb his sadness. Your mother sat blankly by the foot of the bed, hardly being able to look at her husband laid there like that. “I love you, mom.” You whispered sitting beside her, you were the rock of the family, always, so she didn't hesitate to rest her head on her shoulder as she started crying for the millionth time tonight. You once again sat blankly, staring at your shoes, not wanting to imprint the image further into your brain. 

***

You had all since gone back to your house, you went straight to your fathers office, already starting to sort through things, you knew you should take a moment, you knew you should let yourself grieve, but you couldn't. You took a garbage bag from the kitchen, bringing it with you and shutting yourself in there, your brother came in for a while, only telling you what he wanted to take back home with him for his kids. You gave him those items and he let you be, he was never good with his emotions, let alone dealing with yours. You had forgotten to turn your ringer back up on your phone so when you pulled it out to check the time you were shocked to see seven missed calls from Freddie, but one message that made relief hit you like a truck. 

“I’m coming, the plane lands in thirty minutes.” That was sent well over an hour ago, only then did you realize it was nearing one am, you walked out of the office, your sister in law and brother sitting on the couch watching some Adam Sandler movie, your mother had gone to bed, the dog trailing along with her, keeping her company as if he could feel the pain radiating off of her. “Freddie will be here soon.” You announced softly, your brother nodded blankly, he got along well enough with Freddie, but you knew deep down Freddie had a certain level of disrespect for your brother, seeing how poorly he has treated you in the past, but Freddie was more of a man despite being younger than your brother, so you knew he wouldn't act on it. You sat down on the love seat, not wanting to be near them, but not wanting to be alone again, your mind wandered as you thought of how well Freddie and your dad had gotten along, it always made you happy, and your dad had been the one to realize you two would last before even you did. “You’re going to marry him one day, Y/N, wether I’m here or not, just know that I love him.” That memory brought tears to your eyes, and you shot up when you saw headlights outside, the uber dropping Freddie off in front of your house. You ran out the door, not caring how loud you were. “Freddie!” You shouted, making him whip around in the dark as he pulled his suitcase out of the trunk. He nearly dropped it down to the ground, not caring as he rushed to meet you. “Y/N, I’m so sorry, baby, so so sorry.” He whispered, kissing the top of your head repeatedly as you began to cry against him, “I wish I had been here, but I’m not going anywhere now, I promise.” He added making you nod against him, he shuffled to grab his bag with you still clung to him. “Come on, love, it’s cold outside, let’s go inside.” He shushed you, carefully walking with his free arm around you as the other pulled his suitcase along. 

You entered the house, finally loosening your grip on him as Max your dog came barreling out of the room, tail thumping in excitement at the sight of your boyfriend. He reached down to pet the dog as you stayed glued to his side, not wanting to release the comforting grip he had on you. He slowly let go of you to greet your brother and sister in law, you let out an inaudible whimper when he let go of you, as soon as he released you he was back to you. Wrapping you up in his hold again as your brother and his wife made their way to the guest room. “Did you want to get some sleep?” He asked softly, toying with your hair as you nuzzled your face into his neck. You nodded softly, allowing him to lead you to your room, he knew this house like the back of his hand, “wait.” You muttered all of a sudden, letting go of him and walking into your dads office, you took the framed photo of you and him, bringing it into your room and placing it on your dresser, Freddie smiled softly pressing a soft kiss to your temple, before pulling out one of his shirts for you. “I know you’re going to want to take a shower.” He whispered, also knowing your routine like his own, you always wanted to shower after a long day, so you gave him a quick kiss, before trudging into the bathroom.

You let yourself get lost in the shower, meanwhile Freddie quietly made his way to your dads office, he went straight towards the closet, opening the doors slowly as he knew otherwise they would squeak, and he carefully opened the filing cabinet, and could tell by the later of dust on the handle that it probably hadn’t been touched since the day your father showed it to him. He reached in and felt around in the dark, letting out a relieved breath as he felt the small box. He pulled it out, and his eyebrows knit together as their was a note folded up and taped to it. He quickly opened it up, after checking to make sure the ring was still securely in the box, he smiled down at it, it was your grandmothers, and it was ko seceret to anyone that you wanted it to be your engagement ring. He had talked to your father months ago when he started going down hill, and he told Freddie where he hid the ring.

“Alright, Freddie, if you’re reading this note, obviously I didn’t stick around long enough to see this moment. You know you have my blessing to marry Y/N, you treat her better than I ever could’ve imagined, don’t let her go, son. Hold on tight to her... if you’re reading this the day I pass, which knowing my daughter you will be, in fear of her getting rid of the filling cabinet with this still in it. Hold on to this ring, give her some time, you’ll know when the moment is right.”

Freddie couldn’t help but let out a tearful chuckle at the so blatantly forward note your father had left, he heard the shower turn off and quickly made his way out of there, hiding the ring and the note in his suitcase. He changed into some sleeping clothes as your feet started padding down the hallway, “come here.” He whispered, laying back on the bed, you threw your dirty clothes into the corner, not caring enough to do anything else as you crawled in beside him, his large shirt fitting you like a short dress. You pushed your wet hair back and laid your head on his chest, “I love you, Freddie.” You whispered, tracing the pattern on his shirt, “I love you, Y/N.” He sighed in return, giving you an extra squeeze, silently telling you he’d always be here, no matter what.

And it’s true, he was, through all the funeral planning, through both your mother and your own breakdowns, he sat between you too at the funeral, you curled into his side, well he held your moms hand tightly, doing his best to comfort you both as your brother spiraled. He did everything you asked him too and then some, you mentioned needing to grocery shopping, and he offered, not giving you the chance to say no, but you went with him, needing to be out of the house, but he did it all. When your sister in law made the executive decision to have your two young nieces at the funeral-something you completely disagreed with-he helped entertain them, play with them, wiped their tears away when your brother was too busy in his own head to notice. Anyone who had seen the two of you doing all this would think it was your own family, and that made your heart break even more as it was the night after the funeral. Your brother and his family staying until the morning before making the four hour drive back to their home, you woke to a soft knock on your door. Freddie was out like a light, and he deserved to be, handling all these emotions by himself, so you carefully slid out of his grip, not noticing how he stirred when you did so. You opened the door and frowned as you saw your oldest niece, who was still only 7 standing in your doorway, her stuffed animal hugged to her chest, and tears littering her cheeks. “Sweetie, are you okay?” You soothed, kneeling down to her height, she shook her head, “mommy and daddy were arguing, I couldn’t sleep.” She explained to you and you had to hold back a sigh at how ridiculous your brother and his wife were. “Can I stay with you and uncle Freddie?” She whimpered, and your heart burst, she’d never called him that before. “Of course.” Freddie called from the bed, making you jump a little, “come on.” You held your hand out, she took it and followed you into the room, you turned your bedside lamp on, knowing she was scared of the dark. She climbed into the bed and instantly looked exhausted as she became sandwiched between you and your longtime boyfriend. He smiled when she pulled his hand to be on her, he kissed the top of her head, and then did the same to you, calming your nerves as you watched her breathing even out and her eyes rest peacefully.

“Uncle Freddie has a nice ring to it.” You whispered, he let out a breathy laugh, glancing down at the peacefully sleeping girl, he adored them, and it never failed to make your heart swell, he fit right in with your family. “It does.” He answered, thinking of how it will become permanent when he proposes to you in the morning.

***

You woke to both of your nieces jumping onto you, you let a groan out dramatically as you got smothered. “Good morning to you too, girls.” You teased, tickling their sides as you looked up to see Freddie in the doorway. “Girls, can you give me and aunt Y/N a minute?” He asked and they nodded, scurrying out of your room, you pushed yourself up in the bed, smiling at your boyfriend. He brought you a cup of coffee and placed it on your nightstand before pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. “Good morning.” He whispered, fingers tangled in your messy hair. You smiled, your first genuine smile in almost a week as you took in the man before you, “good morning.” You responded happily, of course your heart still ached, but it was always easier to get through it when Freddie was here. “I don’t know if it’s the right time, and I don’t have a whole speech prepared, but this is just something I feel like I have to do.” He trailed off, going over to his suitcase, you furrowed your brows, watching him mutter to himself before standing triumphantly. The second he turned and you saw the oh so familiar red box, your heart skipped a beat, your eyes welled up with tears, for the first time in a long time, they were for good reasons. Your hands shot to your mouth as he nervously kneeled beside the bed, “yes!” You shrieked out, he shook his head in laughter, “can I ask first baby?” He joked, but you muttered an oh shit before nodding. “Y/N, will you marry me?” He skipped the whole spcheel, and you didn’t need to hear it anyways, just what he’s done for you and your family in the past week has shown how much he loves you. “Yes!” You shrieked out again, nearly tackling him to the ground in a hug, you peppered kisses all over his face before finally landing on his lips, giving him a kiss full of love. “Where’d you find it?” You questioned, you’d been looking for the ring for years, and your dad always said it was in a safe place. Freddie slipped the diamond ring on your finger, and of course, it fit perfectly. You looked up at him through your lashes as he did so, seeing the focus on his face as he did such a simple, life changing task. “Your dad told me where he hid it a few months ago.” Freddie admitted and you couldn’t help but let a laugh fall from your lips, that was so something he would do, “of course he did.”

Taglist: @thathockeygirl @literarycharleton

#frederik andersen #frederik andersen imagine #frederik andersen blurb #frederik andersen x reader #freddie andersen #nhl writing #nhl #nhl imagine #toronto maple leafs #toronto maple leafs imagine

[moon-stars01]

Pregnant

Joshua x Reader

Author:YeontanIsMyPresident

Summary:Your boyfriend notices you’re pregnant before you.

Pairing:Joshua(Svt) x Reader

Gene:Fluff,Pregnancy,cute

Rating:General Audiences

Word Count:1360

-Pregnant-

It was a Saturday, a day off for the boys, when you woke up at nine in the morning. You were cuddled up next to Joshua in his bed at the dorms, staring at his sleeping face. He looked so peaceful and at ease that you didn't want to wake him up, but your stomach had other ideas.Not even half an hour had passed when you started feeling nauseous You ran to the bathroom, emptying your stomach's contents. Joshua had heard you from the bed and sat up.

"Y/n? Are you okay?" he called out to you as he came to hold your hair out of the way. He rubbed your back as you continued to lean over the toilet.

Getting up and flushing the toilet you turned towards your concerned boyfriend, "Yeah I'm fine, just got sick a little is all. Don't worry." You grabbed the toothbrush you leave here for when you stay and start to brush your teeth. You could brush all of the sickness off, but Joshua on the other hand was getting increasingly worried. He wasn't afraid to voice it either, "Baby this is the third day in a row that you've thrown up." He followed you as you walked to the living room, seeing only Wonwoo and Dino up.

The smell of bacon cooking made you feel sick to the stomach and you tried to hold the feeling in. Yet your attempt at acting like everything was fine failed when once again you were rushing towards the bathroom. Joshua sighed as he went to make sure you were okay. He hated seeing you like this and he felt even worse because he didn't know what to do.

Dino saw Wonwoo in deep thought and questioned what he was thinking so hard about, "Why do you have that look on your face? What's running through your head?" He didn't receive an answer causing him to shrug and turn back to the stove. He had more important things to do than wait for Wonwoo to speak: Making sure the bacon didn't burn.

It was only five minutes later when Wonwoo finally voiced his thoughts, "What if she's pregnant?" The question made Dino wiped around to stare at his older friend in confusion. They didn't notice the older standing in the doorway and before Dino could ask Joshua beat him to it, "What do you mean by that?" Even though his voice was faint, it still had the power to startle his two members.

"Fuck Joshua-hyung you can't do that!" Dino yelled at him as he held his hand over his chest where his heart was, "I could've had a heart attack!"

Joshua didn't pay him any mind, all of his attention on Wonwoo and wanting to know what made his friend say that. Right as Wonwoo was going to answer, Seungcheol came running in, "Why is there smoke filling the whole dorms!?" It was then the three younger boys had taken notice of the smoke billowing throughout the kitchen and into other parts of the apartment. "And why the hell isn't the smoke alarm working!?"

Seungcheol pulled the smoke alarm off the wall and checked the back, only to see no batteries in it. As he opened some windows and turned the fan on he kept muttering something along the lines of 'fucking vernon always forgetting to change the batteries'. They all became so caught up in trying to get rid of the smoke that they forgot all about their previous conversation.

–0–0–0–0–

A week later and you were still getting sick. Joshua could only watch as you continued to throw up all of your dinner from the night before. A curious and concern glint could be seen in his eyes every time he watched you. Whenever he asked you to go to the doctor you would just reply with, 'It's just the flu. It'll go away soon.'

"Y/n please go to the doctor's. This has been going on for two weeks already!" Anyone could tell Joshua was getting worried about you by the way his voice betrayed his calm exterior.

You sat down on his bed and just rolled your eyes, "I already told you Joshua it's just the flu! It's going to go away soon!" For some reason you were starting to get all emotional. Frustration and sadness creeping up on you. For what reason you had no clue. Joshua, on the other hand, had a good idea as to why. He was getting so frustrated that you weren't even caring that he just blurted out, "Are you pregnant?"

"What?" you gave him a blank face and your voice was monotone as you spoke. He realized what he said and looked at you hesitantly. Seeing his mouth open as to speak, you beat him to it, "Did you just ask me if I'm pregnant?"

"Think about it baby. You're always getting sick in the morning, you're almost always hungry and craving weird things. Like who actually enjoys hot cheetos dipped in some strawberry yogurt?" he started to go off and rant, his voice picking up speed as well as going up an octave. You could tell he was getting anxious and nervous about how you would react, but you couldn't help but to question it. Were you pregnant?

As he was still going off on how you were still beautiful even if you were starting to eat a lot, you got up and walked out of his room. He stopped short and just stared at where you once sat. Quickly coming to the realization that you weren't in the room anymore, he ran out to see you putting your shoes on.

The rest of the boys watched on as Joshua grabbed your wrist lightly, "Where are you going?" You gently tugged your wrist out of his grasp, opening the front door, "I just need some time to think."

Joshua could only watch as you walked away from him, his heart dropping as he thought of everything he had said. Why did he have to blurt out that idea? Why couldn't he have kept his thoughts to himself? He grabbed at his hair and sank to his knees, not noticing his friend come over to him.

Seokmin pulled Joshua up and brought him over to the couch, "Are you okay Joshua-ah?" All Joshua could do was stare at the wall opposite of him making the rest of his band members stare at him with sympathy in their gaze.

–0–0–0–0–

You couldn't believe you were actually doing this. The pregnancy test in your hand shook as your nerves started. Doing as the instructions told you, you waited five minutes and they felt like hours. When your timer went off you jumped, too lost in your thoughts on what would happen if it were positive. Oh god would Joshua leave you? Would he want you to have an abortion? Would you get an abortion just to stay with him? The answer was clear to you as you unconsciously held a hand on your abdomen. No matter what the outcome was, you were keeping the little angel that was growing inside of you.

Shakily picking up the test you clasped a hand over your mouth as tears streamed down your face. It was positive. Grabbing your phone you clicked on Joshua's contact and tried to hold in your sobs. When he answered the call you couldn't hold in the wails coming out of you.

"Y/n!? Are you okay!? What's wrong!?" his voice was frantic as he heard your crying on the other end of the phone. It took you a little while to calm down enough to talk, "Can you please come here? We need to talk." Getting an 'okay' from him, you hung up and continued to cry as you pulled your knees to your chest.

Joshua's heart was racing as he ran all the way to your place. Were you breaking up with him? Were you okay? All of these thoughts were still rushing around his head when he showed up at your door. He used the spare key you gave him and walked in, hearing your cries from the bathroom. He knocked on the door softly, "Y/n? Baby, can I come in?" A small and faint reply came from the other side of the door.

He pushed the door open slowly and saw you sat on the floor against the wall. He crouched in front of you and wiped your tears gently off with the ends of his hoodie.

"Please don't leave me," your voice was quiet and shaking with nerves.

He shook his head and pulled you into his warm embrace, "Never."

You pulled your head away from his chest and looked at the door behind him, "Joshua..I'm pregnant." You could hear as well as feel his breath hitch. You couldn't bear to see the judgement in his gaze, so you kept your eyes away from his.

"Hey, look at me baby girl," his fingers held your chin delicately, turning your head towards him, his eyes calm and loving, "I'd never leave you, especially not over this. We may be young, but I'm certain I want a family with you. You're the one I want to marry in the future." He saw your eyes swell up with even more tears, this time happy, and gave you a feather like kiss on your lips. Gaze falling onto your non existent bump he put a hand over it, "And this little bean in here is ours. Made from our love. I wouldn't want to have this child with anyone else."

You looked at him with so much love in your eyes that it made his heart beat faster, "I love you so much Joshi."

Happy tears filled his eyes as he gave you a passionate kiss,

"I love you too Y/n."

#seventeen #seventeen fanfic #stories #kpop #svt joshua #joshua #joshua x reader #joshua scenarios #Joshua x you #hong jisoo #hong jisoo x reader #joshua drabble #joshua seventeen #joshua fluff

[babysizedfics]

I need to know about doctor mama lo taking care of a sick baby Virgil if you would like pretty please. I dont wanna ask on the in character blog cuz I feel like it would be weird to ask for details and lo seems kinda busy anyway lol.

hey tumblebee!! yeah yeah lets do this, Im gonna write it so that ppl who dont follow the other blog can understand too

WARNING IF U HAVENT ALREADY BLOCKED THE TAGS ILLNESS TW AND VOMIT TW THEY ARE VERY PREVALENT IN THIS

also this is a VERY long headcanon!!

so last night vee got ill, he had been regressed in the afternoon with patton and he was acting much more fussy than usual - not being entertained by his cartoons, not having the energy to play with his rattle, pretty much constantly whining and pouting and he gets very wriggly when he's fussy

patton assumed it was because vee had been upset earlier that day. at one point vee started gripping his stomach, and patton assumed its because he was hungry and could smell the food roman was cooking

but when dinner came around no matter how hard patton tried he couldnt get vee to eat a morsel - he kept turning his head away from the food and whining. at one point patton and logan both managed to convince him to eat a spoonful but his face crumpled with a wince and it looked almost painful for him to swallow it. it was at this point logan noticed he had a faint sheen of sweat on his forehead

things fell into place quickly after that - logan checked his temperature and it was indeed slightly higher than was healthy, they noticed vee's hands were trembling and he was constantly on the verge of tears :(

while patton cleared away dinner and excused roman who wanted to go and craft in his room, logan took vee to his bedroom and tried to check for more symptoms, since vee was non verbal and unresponsive totheir questions. he tested his tummy by pushing it a little to see if the pain got worse when he released it (this is a test for appendicitis) but there was no reaction thankfully except vee being upset by logan not cuddling him. he checked his throat for any redness or infection, nothing.

vee's crying became more pronounced and eventually he was in constant tears, occassionally pleading 'mama mama' through sniffles and hiccups and whines of pain :(( Patton brought him a baby bottle of cooled tea made with fresh mint leaves since that is supposed to help stomach pains. though he left the room again since logan thought it was best not to crowd virgil. Vee's crying had dissipated but he was strangely silent and seemed almost loopy now. he only drank a little of the tea before he pushed it away with a gag.

logan immediately took him to the bathroom knowing what was coming, and sure enough vee threw up into the toilet, crying between gags. logan dutifully managed to keep vee in his lap the whole time and held his hair and rubbed his back, telling him he was such a good boy the whole time

Thankfully it didnt last long as there wasnt much in vees stomach to be emptied. he was shivering and sweating and flushed and had lost all energy. he wasnt even crying anymore, just whimpering under his breath. with a bit of a struggle logan managed to show him how to rinse his mouth out with mouthwash - though he had to hold vee over the sink and pat his back to make sure he didnt swallow it

during all of this patton wasnt able to help because of his heightened empathy, if he sees someone throwing up the likeihood is he will too and that wiuldnt be very helpful! so instead he drives to the store to pick up some medicine and ice pops - and comes back with half the store including some actual baby medicine smh - ((im actually begging u to read that linked post i think its so funny))

it was originallly meant to be logans night to put roman to bed but understandably patton took on that task instead. after roman was drifting off patton pokes his head into vee's room. he had hoped to find lo and vee asleep but they werent. they were lying in the dark with an in the night garden audio story playing on a portable speaker and with vees salt lamp and star night light lighting up the room in a soft glow.

logan offered a strained little smile and nod to patton as he stroked vee's hair and cuddled him close. vee was completely out of it honestly. his body was wholly lax against his mama, his lips were in a permanent pout and his eyes were puffy and wet. he barely even acknowledged his papa coming in, his teary eyes just settled on him for a moment then dropped back to the bedsheets without a reaction. he kept lifting his thumb up to suck on it but logan kept capturing it and apologising as he brought it away. Vee shouldnt suck on his thumb and logan doesnt want to give him a paci while he's ill. understandably, baby vee was completely miserable.

patton asks if logan thinks vee could handle a popsicle or plain crackers at the moment but logan disagrees. he doesnt expect either of them to get much sleep so he will make sure vee eats something in a few hours. with a gentle kiss on vee's forehead patton goes off to bed, confident that logan will be able to look after vee and will come get him if theres any issues

logan and vee really dont sleep much at all. Vee drifts off for a few minutes at a time then gasps awake from vivid fever dreams. logan keeps ice cubes in a bowl by the bed for vee to suck on if he needs to cool down and wraps a couple in a flannel to press to vee's head when his fever rises in the middle of the night.

around 3am logan jolts awake and realises he had drifted off. and vee isnt anywhere in the room. he panics momentarily, bolting up from the bed and dashing to the closet to see if virgil is in there - which he tends to do when he is overwhelmed - but then he hears sniffling from the bathroom.

he finds vee, no longer regressed, curled up against the side of the bathtub with his bangs clinging to his sweaty head. vee is the palest person logan knows but he looks positively grey at the moment

'can i help in any way?' he asks, aware that he doesnt need to baby talk at the moment but still eager to look after this bundle of miserableness

virgil just groans under his breath and clutches his knees to his chest. 'i.. i didnt know what to do with the..' he gestures vaguely to something on the floor

logan notices virgil, being not regressed anymore, had obviously wrestled off the diaper he had been changed into the night before and not known how to dispose of it

'its ok, ive got it' logan wraps it up in a bag and puts it in the trash can they have in the room for just this purpose

'sorry.. m stupid' virgil croaks

'You're not stupid.' logan says firmly as he washes his hands 'You're ill and probably delirious from the fever. it's alright virgil'

theres quiet for a bit longer, virge's head pressed against the porcelain edge of the bathtub likely in an attempt to cool his fever. logan stays there with him for a while just waiting. then suddenly virgil starts sobbing and buries his face in his hands.

'sweetheart, tell me whats wrong please' logan hurries to kneel beside him, lifting his hands away from his face. that wouldnt help the fever

'i dont feel well' virgil cries pathetically, tears rolling down his face.

logans heart breaks 'no, you dont. i'm sorry little one, i know its not nice'

at the nickname virgils thumb raises to his lips again, which logan hurriedly intercepts. 'i'll make you a deal, okay? you're allowed to use a pacifier, but you have to use the same one everyday until you are better. we will need to sterilise it every night too.'

vee sniffles and nods, then chokes 'm not a baby right now though'

'that doesnt matter. you dont need to be regressed to want one of your pacis, vee'

vee is unresponsive and starts scratching at his pyjama pants. logan gets a feeling he isnt saying something. then he notices virgil's pout is much more infantile than his adult ones. 'are you feeling little, baby?'

with a harsh shake of his head vee starts crying again. he whispers 'dont wanna be a b...' then cuts himself off and whimpers

logan cards his fingers through virgils damp bangs. he knows what virgils mind has jumped to. 'were you going to say you dont want to be a baby?' he lifts virgils chin up to look at him 'or that you dont want to be a burden?'

virgils pale lip wobbles 'same fing'

'no sweetheart, no no no,' logan sits on the tiles beside vee and pulls him into his lap. virgil goes willingly. logan rocks his baby as he says 'youre always always allowed to be a baby and its never ever going to upset your family. even if you're an adorable wonderful brave baby boy alllll of the time' he scribbles his finger on virgils rosy cheek and delights at the tiny smile it earns him. 'but especially when you're feeling yucky. you feel a bit yucky today dont you, little one?'

vee nods with a pout

'but yknow whats not yucky? softies and pacis and diapers and lots and lots of cuddles with mama' he holds virgil tighter to prove his point. vee sighs and drops his head to nuzzle against his mama's neck. logan feels he still has a slight fever. 'i know what might help you feel less yucky. does my sweet baby want a sweet ice pop?'

thankfully vee nods against his shoulder and grips tight onto his pyjama shirt, preparing for when logan lifts him up

he first makes sure to change vee into another diaper and even decides that he should wear one of mama's t-shirts as a light dress so he doesnt get as overheated by his pyjamas. at this point vee actually giggles for the first time pretty much all day as he feels the tshirt swish lazily around his legs. logan makes a mental note to observe whether little vee might want to try wearing dresses if the feeling sparks this much joy (at this point logan is unaware that vee has secretly been trying skirts and dresses in his room for months, and roman found out a few weeks ago, but vee isnt ready to tell the cgs yet)

by the time vee is in his diaper and mamas tshirt dress and has a paci and jiji clutched to his chest he is a lot calmer and happier. he's still very ill and exhausted and teary, but theres a tiny smile on his face instead of a pout. in the kitchen he picks a strawberry ice pop and it goes down well, logan convinces him to have a cracker too though vee is in such a young headspace by then that he is just sucking on it, which logan supposes is fine too

by the (real) morning vee is still regressed and has managed to have a couple hours undisturbed sleep. its not much but its better than nothing. logan didnt fare much better. by then vee misses his papa and asks for him and logan hands the responsibility over to papa patton, trustinf the other caregiver enough to catch up on a quick power nap himself

but yes, the main thing is vee thought being ill was a burden enough that he shouldnt be regressed too, but logan makes him see that its okay. vee is regressed pretty much the whole time he is ill over the next few days because its stressful and painful and its a lot easier to feel comforted when ur a baby

yeah! gosh that was long, theres probably a billion spelling mistakes! feel free to ask follow up Qs if i missed anything u wanted to know abt this event

#little/big concepts #illness tw #vomit tw #food mention #long post #asks #tumblebee the smol bean

[nuoyipeach]

Pregnancy (jaejoy os) pt1

21/3/2020

Sooyoung dropped her spoon getting up in a haste, her bowl of cereal falling over as she accidentally hit it and spilled everywhere. She ran off to their bedroom, and Jaehyun heard her slam a door open. He stopped eating and quickly followed behind, and found her in the bathroom leaned over the toilet as she threw up continuously. He went behind her and held her hair back with one hand, the other holding her body up.

"It's OK, slowly... Take it easy baby..."

Sooyoung was on the verge of tears from throwing up so much. Her throat hurt, head spinning, not to mention the horrible feeling in her stomach. She grabbed her tummy with one hand while had other held her up from practically falling into the toilet.

After a few minutes, she seemed better as she simply breathed heavily. Jaehyun slowly held her up and took her to the sink, helping her wash her face and gargle. He then picked her up bridal style and took her to bed, before going back to the toilet to flush and clean up. He returned to see her laying sideways and heard her sniffle. Sitting behind her, he looked over her shoulder to see her crying. He held her hand over her tummy, slowly laying upright next to her, slipping his other arm underneath her to hold her close.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm... I don't know... I feel bad... I don't know anymore..."

Jaehyun left soft kisses on her cheek, shoulder and hand, then he'd her tighter with his head in the crook of her neck. "Don't cry. I'm here." he knew why she cried. He realised a pattern, that whenever she threw up, she'd have a mood swing right after.

Sooyoung held his hand tighter and tighter, afraid that if she let go she'd lose him. For some reason she had a fear of him leaving, because she was pregnant.

She threw up, which was disgusting. She was starting to lose her attractive figure. She wouldn't be able to attend his needs. She was becoming a load to take care off, finding herself burdensome.

What if he doesn't love me anymore?

"I heard that." she heard him say, and realised she said the last line out loud. "And your wrong. If I didn't love you, I would've left you the moment I found out you were pregnant. Also, why wouldn't I love my own wife? This baby is mine too. I'm more than happy we're having a baby. Don't do this Sooyoung. Don't think like this."

Sooyoung slowly turned to his side, burying her face into his chest. Jaehyun brushed her hair with one hand, and traced her slightly protruding tummy with the other. It has only been three months, but he was already craving to hold the baby, wanting it out soon. He wasn't lying when he said he loved it. He was so overwhelmed with joy, that he almost held a party if not for Sooyoung's protest.

"Come on, you still need to eat something. What do you feel like having that won't make you sick?"

Sooyoung moved her face away slightly and played with his tank top thinking. A lot of things made her nauseous, even milk like earlier. Whatever she thought of made her feel sick, and that made her sadder because she couldn't find something to eat.

"I don't know..." she teared up. Jaehyun sighed and kissed her head, wiping away her tears.

"I'll make you a strawberry smoothie. How's that?"

Not feeling sick, Sooyoung decided to just go with it and nodded. Jaehyun got up and tucked her in, handing her the TV remote. "Stay here, I'll be right back." he smiled and kissed her before leaving. Sooyoung turned on a random cartoon channel, but simply thought about Jaehyun the whole time. He was so perfect in everything that she couldn't think about one small flaw even. Even his skin was too perfect.

Sooyoung heard him say all the same to her, but that was before she got pregnant. Now, she wondered whether he thought about her the same way. Or did his feelings change. She can't help think this way. Her mood swings were horrible, and she could only be thankful Jaehyun was calm enough to deal with her.

"Here." she turned to see jaehyun back with strawberry smoothie, and a bowl of gelatto. "Since you're getting sick to diary, maybe this will be better."

Sooyoung sat up smiling as he placed the tray next to her and sat at the edge of the bed. He first gave her some medicine, then the smoothie. She drank it up, finishing halfway in one go, and heard him chuckle amused.

"Damn. I should make more next time, you are going eating twice as much from now on."

Jaehyun instantly regretted his words when she slammed the cup down.

"Are you calling me fat?" she asked upset. He shook his head smiling, and held her hand.

"Of course not. You have to eat a lot. It's for the baby. We don't want either of you weak, right?"

Sooyoung looked down to her hands, when he suddenly spooned some gelatto and fed her. She looked at him, and decided to ask what's been bothering her the whole time.

"Do you think I'm perfect to you like I was before?"

Jaehyun furrowed his eyebrows confused and set the bowl down. "What do you mean?"

"You always called me perfect, pretty, healthy fit, graceful... But you don't anymore... Am I ugly now that I'm pregnant? I mean, I know I'm breaking out a little on my forehead, and I lost shape, but it's not that bad right? I've been gobbling up food though... I must look unattractive now to people. I feel so down..."

Before she could say anymore, Jaehyun jumped onto her pushing her down and hovered above her, making sure not to put pressure on her body. He pressed his lips onto hers, and bit on her bottom lip sucking it.

Their make out session was quick as Jaehyun pulled away and turned then over, having Sooyoung straddle his lap as they both sat up. He continued to kiss her, lips, cheek, nose, jaw, collar, neck, even until the valley of her breasts, her low cut night dress giving him easy access. He nuzzled into her chest, one hand on her back, and another tracing her tummy again.

"I'm sorry if I didn't say it to you up front. I'll be honest with you, but you're even more beautiful when you're pregnant. I don't care about your fit body, your break outs, your eating habits. Your body is perfect for our baby, your face is always pretty to me no matter what, and your eating habits are adorable, because you're eating for two people now. You're always perfect to me. Everything happening to you is natural, and that's what I love about you, so you're perfect. I don't want you to change a thing."

He kissed her exposed skin above her breasts, slowly going back up to her lips to see her cheeks stained with tears. He kissed them away before attaching their lips again, Sooyoung's hands finally leaving his tank top and gripping his hair and around his neck as she too pulled him closer.

"I need more strawberries!"

Sooyoung whined kicking the blanket. Six and a half months and her cravings were getting worse, as did her mood swings. She got mad too easily, to the point Jaehyun decided to work from home since she'd get upset of him leaving her alone.

Right now he checked the fridge but they ran out. He sighed and closed it, going back to the bedroom where Sooyoung laid sprawled across the bed.

"We're out baby. How about we both go down to the grocery store and get some? You must feel sad staying in all the time."

Sooyoung huffed not wanting to get up, crossing her arms and pouting. But Jaehyun could only chuckle because he knew she'd listen. He knew she'd been feeling sad staying in a lot since she was scared to go out, so going out once today would help her open up a little. And she knows that he knew that she'd go anyways. He sat next to her and opened his arms.

"Come here." he cooed. Being extra emotional now, Jaehyun would try to show affection to her even more seeing that it made her happy. Sooyoung looked at him with a big smile and slowly got up scooting closer. She snuggled into his embrace, her bump pressing against his side where he felt a kick, and squealed. "See, even the baby loves my cuddles."

Sooyoung looked up and grinned at him. "What can I say. Your cuddles are the best. But not to be shared outside us, got that?" she commanded, making him laugh and nod. He got up and slowly helped her stand as well, passing her her coat as he put his on himself.

"I'll walk you, don't worry. But it's time to go out and get some fresh air, especially for you."

They were soon out walking around the neighbourhood to the grocery store. Sooyoung really enjoyed the outdoors from being inside for so long. The fresh air really helped her feel better. Though she was taking a long time to walk, Jaehyun didn't care and walked with her, an arm around her waist holding her close to him. Any passerby around them could tell what kind of a happy family they already were, and could only imagine how happy they would be more when the baby comes out.

Once at the store, Sooyoung decided to sit on the benches at the entrance while Jaehyun did the shopping since he didn't want her to walk around too much. Sooyoung's place was at the opening, near the counter that she could hear them. She was playing with her phone, going through some things when she saw a text from Jaehyun saying he's almost at the cashier. Sooyoung was about to get up when she over heard the cashier talking into her phone.

"Yea he's here again. You know, pale tall guy, built and has dimples. I can never ever focus... Oh my God, he's coming, gotta go!"

Sooyoung looked and saw Jaehyun making his way to the cash register, and noticed the way the young lady, obviously a new adult, suddenly became all shy and flirty. Jaehyun placed the basket on the counter and smiled, being the polite man he was, while she looked through the items.

"Wow, so many strawberries again. You must really like them." she tried to converse. Jaehyun chuckled and was about to answer, when someone called him.

"Hyunnie, did you get my strawberries?"

Both the cashier and Jaehyun looked to see Sooyoung come and hold his hand. Sooyoung peeked and saw the girl's smile drop, especially when she saw her baby bump. Jaehyun chuckled and kissed her forehead.

"Enough for two weeks this time. Then we won't have to come out again." he joked. Sooyoung scowled at him, then peeked again to see the cashier glare at her, scanning the products faster this time. She rested her head on his shoulder and hugged Jaehyun's arm, and he knew there was only one reason behind her clingy behaviour, and this wasn't only when she's pregnant, but since they were together three years ago.

She was jealous.

Once she was done packing their things up, Jaehyun gave his (black) card and waited for her to swipe it, when he decided to have some fun.

"You should smile more, you look prettier."

He felt a sharp pain in his arm as Sooyoung dug her nails into it, and bit his bottom lip holding in the yelp. The girl pressed her lips holding in a smile and blushed, losing focus for a second. She quickly got back, and gave them the bag, and before anymore was exchanged, Sooyoung dragged Jaehyun away the moment he took his card back.

Jaehyun chuckled as she ignored him on the way home. But he noticed how she wasn't angry like usual, but she was sad. He felt bad for teasing her, but couldn't get her to talk even when they reached home. Sooyoung went to the bedroom, and Jaehyun followed after putting away the groceries, finding her laid down facing away from the door. He laid down next to her, and tried to hug her but she pushed his arms off.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

"You've been seeing someone... And it's that cashier sl*t!"

Jaehyun felt hurt, but it was partly his fault. He knew he shouldn't be teasing her like this during her last few weeks, especially when she was naturally protective of him. He sighed and hugged her tight so that she couldn't let go this time, and kissed her shoulder and neck.

"I'm sorry I teased you. But it's not true. I don't even know her name, she's just always working there, so I became familiarised. I'd never do that to you baby, you know it. Look at me, please."

Sooyoung couldn't, as she was hiding her face into the pillow with a smaller one on top because she couldn't stop crying. Jaehyun snaked an arm under her head, and pulled her over to turn around to him. He pulled the top pillow away and tried to face her, but she forced her face down and hid in his chest.

"Baby please, trust me. I shouldn't have teased you. I'm sorry Sooyoung, look at me just please, you don't have to talk to me."

Sooyoung wrapped an arm around his torso, cuddling more into him, face burying into his chest. Jaehyun smiled lightly and held her close as well, his arm under head head combing her hair back.

"You know, with you and Sohyun later around, I don't think I'll be able to look let alone talk to any other girl." he chuckled trying to lighten the mood. Sooyoung just sighed, suddenly whining silently before sitting up. Jaehyun could tell she felt uncomfortable about something. "What's wrong?"

"It's just..." her left hand went up to the top of her right breast, pressing into it. "It hurts here..."

Jaehyun took her hand off and kissed it. "You're lactating. Remember the doctor said it would hurt sometimes since they're growing." he slowly shifted to sit behind her, trapping her between his legs. "I'll massage, here."

He started to softly press down her shoulders, putting small pressures with his fingers at wherever he felt knots. Slowly he shifted his hands to the top of her breasts where she claimed it hurt, and gently pressed down. Sooyoung flinched in discomfort, and he mumbled a quiet sorry before massaging more gently.

Sooyoung leaned back against his chest, her head falling back on his shoulder as she tried to relax. His hands slowly went underneath her breasts, massaging them gently there. "Better?" he asked and pecked her forehead.

"Hmm... Thank you..." she mumbled. Jaehyun stopped, and wrapped his arms around her chest hugging her, and continued kissing her neck.

"I love everything about you..."

"What do you mean?" she asked, confused by his sudden confession.

His hands started to move up to her hair, combing it down. "I love your hair."

Poked her nose. "I love seeing your face."

Rubbed and kissed her shoulder. "I love touching your skin."

Held her hand. "I love your delicate hands."

Held her breast, and her tummy. "I love that you're going through all this for our baby. Your breasts, tummy, hips are getting bigger. I know how uncomfortable you are, but you're going through with it for our baby. I can't love you enough for all this."

Sooyoung looked down at their hands as he held both hers around her tummy, and continuously kissed her from head to shoulder. She slowly faced him when he suddenly rubbed his nose on hers lovingly.

"Jaehyun, why are my mood swings so bad... I hate it. I feel like I'm disturbing you... And even to myself, I hate it."

Jaehyun sighed and kissed both her hands before hugging her again, and swung side to side.

"I don't find it a nuisance. But I'm sorry you feel bad about it yourself. It's normal, but I guess I shouldn't tease you anymore." he chuckled. "From now on, I'll love you so much you'll be begging for me to stop, but I won't because you deserve to be loved more than ever."

Sooyoung felt uncomfortable, and woke up. Something wasn't letting her sleep, and she figured the baby must have been moving around as she felt something on her tummy. She shifted, and realised Jaehyun's arm was holding her securely to himself, so turned around slowly to face him. She cupped his cheek and traced it with her thumb, and a smile slowly crept onto her lips.

"Why... are you up... so late?" Jaehyun mumbled and held her hand on his cheek, eyes still closed.

"I can't sleep... The baby's awake I thi- Ack!" she suddenly crouched slightly, grabbing her lower tummy. Her sound was enough to wake Jaehyun completely and sit up right away. He held her arms and helped her sit up.

"What happened?"

"I think she just kicked too ha- AKH!" she groaned louder, crouching even more. Jaehyun quickly got up, put on a tank top and sweat pants, and got both their coats. He then took his own hoodie and shorts and put them on Sooyoung after taking off her night dress, not bothered to help her out on a bra. He carried her to stand, and helped her out on her coat, put his own on, then carried her again downstairs to his car.

"Wait, no, it's just a ki- AKH!" he stood her up to open the door, when his attention was taken away by her next action, as liquid poured out between her legs.

"NO IT'S NOT, YOUR WATER BROKE!"

Jaehyun didn't take another second before pushing her into the passenger's seat and driving off, one hand on the wheel while the other held her hand to let her squeeze something through the pain.

It didn't take long to reach the hospital, and Sooyoung was quickly taken into a ward. But the doctor came in, and shook her head.

"We'll have to wait. The opening is too small, or she'll be hurt."

Sooyoung couldn't take having to sit through her labour pain, at three in the morning, and for the next four hours. She cried every few minutes, and all Jaehyun could do was lay down next to her and hold her close. He wished to share the pain, as seeing her tears broke his heart. At one point she yelled so loud he couldn't take it, and forced the nurse to call the doctor.

"She's in pain! Just check, I'm sure it's OK now, please!"

The doctor took a look at Sooyoung, and nodded at the nurse. "I think it is OK. Take her to the delivery room. Sir, you can follow her and put on the robe and mask."

Jaehyun was prepared, and he stood next to Sooyoung as she kept tossing and turning on bed, gripping on the side bars of the delivery bed. He took both her hands and held them himself. Sooyoung hesitated, but with a sudden pain, dug her nails into his skin.

"That's it... It's OK, let it out. It'll be over soon." he whispered and kissed her forehead.

The baby was out, and Sooyoung opened her arms out coaxing to hold her, tears of joy streaming down her cheeks. "Jung Sohyun... Our beautiful daughter... You're here, with us... I can't believe it."

Jaehyun crouched down next to them and held both of them close to him. He looked at Sooyoung as they shared a loving stare and kissed. "Thank you Sooyoung. You gave us the best gift anyone could ask for. You made us happier. I love you so much." he let out a tear before kissing her again.

"I promise, both of you, and any future child we have, that I'll never love anyone else but you."

"Future child?" Sooyoung asked quietly. Jaehyun simply smiled back with a wink.

"Remember what I said, you're even more beautiful when you're pregnant."

part 2

#NCT #nct 127 #nct jaehyun #jeong jaehyun #red velvet #red velvet fanfic #red velvet joy #Park Sooyoung #kpop fanfic #kpop oneshots #fluff #nct fluff #red velvet fluff #jeong yoonoh

[massivedrickhead]

I was wondering if you’d do a bechloe prompt where one of them has a miscarriage? Lots of angst please!

I hope it’s angsty enough for you... 

I also think this might work for today’s prompt for bechloe week - Hospital - so I’m gonna tag it. If you disagree let me know and I’ll remove it.

Read on AO3

Trigger warning: miscarriage 

------------

When they returned home from the hospital, the silence was deafening.

And that sounds cliché to say, but it’s the only way to describe it. 

For a house that was usually so full of noise, so full of life, the silence was colossal. It was dominating. Devastating.

“Is this real?” Beca asked, a tone of bewilderment in her voice. Because surely this couldn’t be happening. It couldn’t be real. Not after they’d waited for so long. Not after they’d gotten so close.

Chloe didn’t reply, and they didn’t speak again for the rest of the night.

Beca managed to shower before she crawled into bed. Washing away the blood and the smell of the hospital. Her hand kept gravitating towards her stomach. Desperate to feel something. A kick. A shove. A wriggle. Because maybe they’d made a mistake. Maybe they’d gotten it wrong. But no. Every time her hand touched her stomach, she knew. 

When Chloe finally made it to bed, Beca had already cried herself to sleep. 

Chloe faced the wall, their backs only a few inches apart, but there might as well have been an ocean between them. Chloe knew she should comfort her wife. Turn over and pull her close. Whisper reassurances. But she couldn’t. For the first time in her life, Chloe didn’t know what to say. There was nothing she could say to make this easier on either of them. And she didn’t want to rest her hand on that spot on Beca’s stomach, the place she had so often found herself drawn to these days , because she knew it would make it seem real. Acknowledging what they’d lost would make it real, and Chloe needed to pretend for a little bit longer.

When Beca woke the next morning, she had roughly twenty seconds of contentment. Sun was peaking through the curtains, warming their bedroom. She could hear birds outside, and the neighbour’s dog barking. 

And then she remembered, and she was pinned to the bed by wave after wave of grief. With each breath she took, the pain got worse. Wordlessly, she reached out to where Chloe should be, but the space beside her was empty. She could hear movement in the house. The constant opening and closing of doors, the banging of cabinets, but nothing else. No music, no singing. The silence was still alien to her, but she’d get used to it. 

While Beca remained paralysed in bed, Chloe began gathering up the things they’d bought in the last few weeks. Diapers, clothes, soft toys, bottles - all of it went into the nursery. Still half-painted. Forever half-painted. They never did decide on a colour and now they wouldn’t need to. 

When Chloe was finished, their house looked the same as it had done almost five months ago, with one exception. Chloe hadn’t been able to bring herself to remove the photograph of the scan from their refrigerator. She closed the door of the nursery and vowed not to open it again.

She could not go through this again.

Over the next few days, Beca and Chloe existed like ghosts in their home. Not speaking, not touching, just drifting from place to place.

Beca stayed in bed mostly. The aftermath of what had happened had left her physically drained and made moving difficult and painful, and she didn’t have the emotional energy to fight through it.

Chloe found she couldn’t keep still. She would go for a run on a morning, out of the house before Beca had woken up, and would spend the rest of her day cleaning, tidying, answering work emails.

When they happened to pass each other in the hall, in the kitchen, leaving the bathroom, they left enough room between them so they didn’t touch. Neither knew if the other was doing this deliberately.

Neither even really noticed it was happening.

Any fear about what would happen to them and their marriage was buried beneath layers and layers of unrestrained grief.

When they spoke it was for purely practical reasons.

“Can you pass the milk?”

“Do you need anything from the store?”

“Is that your phone or mine?”

They were both used to the silence by now, and wouldn’t have noticed if it changed.

When Beca heard Chloe speaking on the phone to Aubrey or her mom, Beca couldn’t make out the words she was saying. 

She couldn’t focus on anything but this loss. 

Somewhere deep down, she wanted Chloe. She needed her. There were moments at night, when Chloe would be lying beside her, both turned away, both feigning sleep, when Beca would get the urge to turn over. To seek some comfort. To reach out and touch her the way she used to. 

But she was always too scared to make the first move. She didn’t know if Chloe blamed her for what had happened, and she was too afraid to find out. 

The doctor had assured them this was no one’s fault. Sometimes, these things just happen. But Beca couldn’t help but shoulder the blame. 

Sometimes she clung to that feeling, the way focusing on a paper cut might distract you from a stubbed toe, but it would never last long. A paper cut might distract you from a stubbed toe, but it couldn’t distract you from shotgun wound in the stomach.

For what it’s worth, Chloe didn’t blame Beca. Not for a second. Not once.

But Chloe knew she hadn’t made any effort to comfort Beca since that night at the hospital, and that had brought about her own guilt. She’d held her hand as the doctor explained what had happened, but somewhere along the way, she’d let it slip away, and hadn’t reached out to take it again.

She was scared of reaching out now, in case Beca rejected her. Telling her it was too little, too late. She couldn’t cope with that pain as well.

So they carried on existing this way for over a week.

Beca kept refusing to answer her phone and Chloe kept telling everyone who offered help that it wasn’t a good time. 

They were two ghosts drifting around their home, lost in their own grief.

Until Beca’s body gave out on her. 

She had been sitting on the sofa, ten days after the loss of their baby girl, staring into space. She had been sore for days, her back, legs and stomach aching and cramping. It made it difficult for her to sit in one spot for too long, and soon found the pain building again. She tried to push herself up from the sofa, but couldn’t manage it. Her body wasn’t cooperating, and the soft cushions of the sofa were offering no resistance. Her fists just sank deeper into them as she tried to push herself up harder.

“Chloe?” She called, the name feeling strange on her tongue. When had she last said it? 

She heard the sound of fast approaching footsteps. The sound of Beca saying her name had broken through whatever thoughts she had been lost in.

“Beca? Did… Did you need something?”

“I can’t get up,” Beca said, jaw clenched against the pain. Chloe could see her arms shaking at the effort. “Can you help me?”

“Yeah,” Chloe said. Beca allowed herself to relax and fell back into the sofa. “Grab my arms,” she said, her hands holding Beca’s forearms. Beca nodded, and did, her chest suddenly feeling tight at the feeling of her wife’s hands holding her. “Ready?” Beca nodded again and Chloe pulled her up, supporting her when it looked like her legs wouldn’t. “Okay?”

“Thanks,” Beca said, not wanting to let go. “Can… Can you help me get to the bathroom?”

“Of course,” Chloe said. “What happened?”

“I don’t know,” Beca said. “I’ve been aching really bad since… But it’s never been like this before.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you’ve been in pain?”

Beca left the question unanswered. Chloe wasn’t really expecting one.

“Give me a shout if you need any help?” Chloe said, closing the door behind her, giving Beca some privacy. 

She hadn’t thought much about it, but now she realised now how much she’d missed hearing Beca’s voice. How much she missed the feeling of her. How much she missed her. 

She heard the flush of the toilet and the sound of running water, and then Beca came hobbling out of the room.

“Were you listening to me pee, creep?” The lightness in her voice took them both by surprise.

“Just trying to make sure you could get off the toilet with those old arthritic knees of yours,” Chloe replied.

For the first time in ten days, they became truly aware of each other’s presence.

Tear filled eyes met, and they saw their own pain reflected back at them. 

“Come lie down with me?” Beca asked, her voice a fraction of what it had been a moment ago. 

Chloe nodded, and followed Beca into their bedroom. 

They lay side-by-side, staring up at the ceiling, their hands millimetres apart, but still not touching.

“Do you blame me?” Beca asked.

“No,” Chloe replied, honestly. “I’m sorry I haven’t-”

“Don’t,” Beca said, cutting her off. “Don’t be sorry. I haven’t either.”

Beca took a deep breath, and reached out to take Chloe’s hand. The contact almost made her cry.

“I miss you,” Chloe said, threading their fingers together.

“I miss you too,” Beca replied, blinking back tears.

“And I miss her,” Chloe said, swallowing hard as they both continued to stare up at the ceiling.

“Me too,” Beca said, her voice breaking now. “I miss her so much. I miss feeling her move inside me. I miss her little kicks. I even missed the way she liked to lie on my bladder.”

Chloe let out a teary laugh. “What do we do?” She asked after a small silence.

“I don’t know,” Beca replied. “But I don’t want to do it alone anymore.”

“Me neither.”

And then Beca turned over, arms reaching out, searching for the comfort only Chloe could give. Chloe pulled her in close, arms wrapping around her, lips pressed against her hairline. 

And they cried until they fell asleep, wrapped in each other’s arms for the first time in ten days.

The next morning they woke up and they continued to grieve, and morn. They continued to shut the world out. To eat less than they should. To avoid talking about it. To cry. They continued to struggle to cope with their loss.

Only now they did it together, and it made all the difference.

#bechloe #bechloe week #bechloe drabble #bechloe prompt #bechloe angst #otp prompt #drabble #trigger warning miscarriage #tw: miscarriage #miscarriage tw #miscarriage trigger warning #tw #trigger warning #Beca x Chloe #beca #chloe #beca mitchell #chloe beale #bechloe fanfiction #bechloe fanfic #fanfiction #Pitch Perfect #pitch perfect fanfic #pitch perfect fanfiction

[aestheticseungmean]

Memories-Ateez

Synopsis- After an accident causing you to be chained to the hospital bed makes you forget your memories, soon you’ll remember each member.

Warning: This is 𝑛𝑜𝑡 accurate.

Colors are the memories

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

The wires trapped you to the bed. The tubes made your nose sore but you needed them so you could breathe. The IV made you unable to move your arm much and the constant in and out of sleeping exhausted you. The raspy sound of you breathing and the steady beeping of the monitor were the only sounds in the room. But that sound was soothing to the people who visited you because it meant you were still alive. Blinding lights gave you constant headaches all the time. Words came out of your mouth but they were weak. “Mingi?” He looked up at you hopefully. “Yes?” “Can you turn the lights down?” Happily, he turned down the lights.

Slowly, you were slipping into sleep until a sharp pain shocked you awake and you gasped for air. “MINGI-“ you grasped the bed, your body shaking vigorously. Scared, he called the doctors who ushered him out of the room. “NO. I NEED TO BE IN THERE WITH HER.” He fought and clawed until security dragged him to the waiting room. The boys that were waiting for him had to hold him back. “I know that she’s important to you, Mingi but she’s important to us too.” “YOU DON’T KNOW HOW BAD IT HURTS, SEONGHWA.” Mingi turned towards the doors but Seonghwa turned him around. “BULLSHIT, MINGI. I’M HER BOYFRIEND FOR FUCK SAKE. I LOVE HER SO YEAH, I KNOW HOW BAD IT HURTS. NOW SIT DOWN.”

It was currently 3 AM so nobody was being bothered except the few nurses that remained there. Mingi reluctantly sat down. A few hours later, Seonghwa went to grab some drinks. As he was coming back the doctor came out. “Mingi, your sister has stabilized but…she might have lost some or all of her memory including you guys.” Audible gasps were heard as Mingi dropped down onto the floor and cried. This was worse than when his parents died. Shock froze Seonghwa and he dropped the tray of drinks. The liquid splattered everywhere and tears welled in his eyes. “Can we see her?”asked Jongho. The doctor nodded and the boys followed him leaving the mess for the janitor.

There you sat even worse than ever. You had a new gown and I.V. The medicine wore off and you were awake. You looked with wide eyes at the boys coming into the room. Mingi reached out to touch your hand but you pulled it away. “Who are you?” That’s what it took to make Mingi break down again. His own sister didn’t remember him. You looked around the room and a red-haired boy caught your attention. You knew him but you couldn’t put your finger on it. He softly smiled at you and then it hit you. “Hongjoong?”

Memories flooded your head. Hongjoong washed your cuts and bruises. “I’m going to start calling you Eomma, Joongie. He smiled at you and played along. “Then I should call you grandma because you are prone to accidents.” “Yah! You act like I hurt my finger when I touch you.” Laughter filled the air. “You did remember?” Another memory popped up. “HONGJOONGIE? GUESS WHAT DAY IT IS?” “Is it hump day?” “No.” You pouted. Hongjoong smiled at you being cute. “IT’S. MY. BIRTHDAY!” Each breath, you poked him. “I’m twelve now!” “Old lady! Old lady!” You poked him again and held your finger. “OW, MY FINGER!” “I’ll kiss it to make it better.” He kept true to his word and kissed your finger. “Thanks, Joongie~”

Hongjoong moved towards you and nodded. “It’s me. How did you know?” “Your smile, Hongjoong Eomma.” A loud sob came from the floor and you saw the boy that tried to touch you. He was crying and you couldn’t figure out why. “Excuse me, nurse?” The nurse who was doing your vitals looked at you. “Can you help me to the bathroom?” She nodded and helped you. When you flushed the toilet, you turned to the sink. You looked up and gasped. The slightly less plump lips and a softer nose stood out to you. You had the same features as the boy but softer and smaller. With the nurse’s help, you waddled back to the room.

A few weeks later, you could walk by yourself. The same 8 boys came to the room everyday. Each time, the same boy cried. He was sitting in the chair biting back his tears when you got up and slowly walked towards him. He looked up at you confused. Softly, you grab his hand and held it before asking a question. “You’re my brother aren’t you?” Realization came to him and he jumped up and nodded. You made an m sound with your mouth but you couldn’t continue. His name slipped your mind. “M-m-mi-“ you sighed. “It’s okay, I’m just glad you remembered who I was to you.” You softly brushed away his tears and smiled. “I’ll get it so don’t tell me.” He nodded and hugged you. “Yeosang, come here.” You heard from somewhere in the room. Yeosang you repeated. Yeosang, Yeosang, Yeosang.

A brief memory of you being pushed on the swing on a summer afternoon appeared. You were laughing and smiling with the boy who was pushing you but you kept screaming. “Yeosang, higher.” “Don’t fall.” But you did. You fell and cried. The boy carried you in his arms to your house and you could hear your brother reprimanding him. “SHE SAID HIGHER.” “THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD DO IT.” “SHE’S 18! YOU DON'T HAVE CONTROL OVER HER LIFE.” You stared at the ceiling waiting for it to stop. “EVER SINCE MOM AND DAD DIED IN THAT CRASH, IT HAS BEEN JUST US SO SORRY IF I AM TOO PROTECTIVE.”

Yeosang. You remembered. “Excuse me, um M-Min- argh! I’ll be right back.” Quickly, you scanned the room and saw a boy with a birthmark on his face. You tapped on his shoulder. He turned around hopeful. “Yes?” “Yeosang!” You were sure of it. He looked the same as the boy just older. “You remembered!” He hugged you. “Yeosang, higher,” you repeated from your dream. “That was two years ago.” “I remember though.” They were excited that you were slowly remembering them through memories. Within two weeks, you remembered two out of eight names and three out of eight faces. Even the doctor was surprised by her recovery speed. Thinking of the doctor, he came into the room to deliver news.

“Glad to see you are all awake!” “Hello, doctor.” All eyes and ears were on him. “You can go home in two days, we just want to run a few more post trauma tests. At the rate she is going, she might remember you all by the end of the year.” Cheers and smiles filled the room. Two days later, the celebration began. You walked home to the house that you found out was shared with all eight boys. A “Welcome Home” banner hung over the cake that said the same thing. Mingi hugged you and sat you in front of your cake. “Vanilla cake with the frosting cold, just how you like it.” You took a bite and savored the flavors.

Then it hit you. “Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear, Jongho! Happy birthday to you.” You could hear Yeosang start the korean version. “생일 축하합니다! 생일 축하합니다! 사랑하는 종호! 생일 축하합니다!” He blew out the candles and your brother served the cake. “I’m going to put my cake in the fridge. I like the icing cold.” “Then I will too because you are the food connoisseur.” You giggled at Jongho placing his piece next to yours. Soon all the boys were following suit. “Now how are we going to tell them apart?” “Mine has any name on it.” “Let’s organize them by age.” You put yours next to Yeosang’s since you were only a few months older. In the meantime, you guys danced to the different songs that were playing on the radio.

“I remember Jongho’s birthday.” “I’m glad my birthday was so memorable.” You looked at your cake intensely. Quickly, you got up and turned the radio on. A song from your memory was playing and you danced along. “Come join me!” The nine of you laughed and danced and ate cake all night long. It was time to head to bed but you found one of the boys sleeping there. Being nice and trusting, you laid next to him and closed your eyes. “Why can’t you remember me? Was our relationship not memorable?” Nothing came out. Frankly, you couldn’t think of anything to say. Instead, you fell asleep. When you woke up, you left a note. “I’m sorry I don’t remember our relationship. Hopefully I will soon.”

The first sweatshirt you could find, you threw on. It was a bit big on you and you wondered why. You ran a brush through your hair but you couldn’t do anything with it. You couldn’t remember how to braid or anything else. “Do you need help with that?” A shortish boy stood in the doorway. He had a bright smile and fluffy hair. “Yes please.” Feeling obligated, you lowered yourself. “Ah, thank you.” His fingers intertwined in your hair slowly French braiding it. It felt like Deja Vu. The whole thing felt familiar. The boy’s fingers braiding your hair as he hummed. You slouched so he could reach the top of your head. Him catching your eyes in the mirror and smiling.

“Ahh, too tight!” “Relax, it will loosen up. I didn’t pull your hair that tight.” You looked at him in the mirror wincing every time he pulled another strand. “Wooyoung-ah. I’m going to be bald by twenty-five because of you.” Wooyoung laughed. “You are such a whiny baby.” “Can you sing me a song?” “Which one?” You shrugged. He started humming 𝕊𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕄𝕖 by BTS. Not realizing it, you started to sing along to it. As the song ended, Wooyoung put in the ponytail holder. You stood up. “Thank you!” “You whined the whole time and now you’re going to act like you didn’t,” he teased. “Sorry, Wooyoung-ah.” You held a finger heart up and he reciprocated it. “You’re welcome.”

Just like the memory, he finished humming and put in the ponytail holder. Carefully, you stood up and hugged him. Confused, he hugged you back. “Thank you, Wooyoung!” “You remembered me! Was it me braiding your hair for the first time?” “I don’t know but we sung um- I’ll hum it for you.” You hummed 𝕊𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕄𝕖 and he smiled. “I remember that day, you were getting ready for homecoming. You were so pretty! Let’s go look at the pictures.” Before you knew it, you were being dragged to the hall of memories. Photos from all family and friend events were littered on the wall. He pointed at one with you in a short, poofy dress. You recognized the boy in it as the one who shared the room with you. The boy was in almost every photo with you and your eyes wandered down the hall.

You made your way to the living room but the picture remained in your head. For the rest of the night, you were distracted. You knew Wooyoung, Yeosang, Hongjoong and Jongho. That’s half the battle at least. Confused from the conversation the boys were participating, you got up. “Where are you going?” You looked at your brother. “Just going to wander around the house.” With nowhere in mind, you wandered back into your room. The pink and blue lacy fabric caught your eye from the closet. Curious, you picked up the dress. Almost immediately, you remembered the picture. It was your homecoming dress.

That night, you laid staring at the ceiling and the boy wrapped his arms around you. The rings on your fingers matched and for a minute you could hear his voice when you got it. “It’s a promise ring because I am so in love with you, it hurts.” A smile appeared on your face. You didn’t know who he was but it felt right. Slowly and carefully, you grabbed his hand and drifted off to sleep. The morning light peaked through the bathroom and onto your face. Annoyed, you got up and started your day. Before you knew it, you were in the kitchen making pancakes. A yawn sounded behind you. “Wah, pancakes!” You turned and saw a bright smile.

“I’m hopeless, San. All I can make is scrambled pancakes.” You pouted and he squished your cheeks. “Here, let’s make pancakes together.” When you got scared to flip the pancakes, he grabbed your hand and helped you flip it. Finally, you got a good pancake. “SAN, WE DID IT!” You hugged him tight and jumped in joy. You eventually learned how to make pancakes from scratch and it became the favorite around the boys. Once a week, you woke up and made pancakes and the boys would slowly gather around the table at the smell. “PANCAKES ARE SERVED.” “WAH, PANCAKES!” “You are so dramatic, San.” He giggled at you. “Pancake day is the best day.”

“I don’t know how I know the recipe but I guess it’s pancake day, San.” “Pancake day is the best day!” You laughed and waved him over. San practically skipped over to you. “Here, try this.” You held up a tiny pancake to his mouth and he bit it. “Wahhhhh, just like last time.” Rolling your eyes playfully, you laughed and playfully pushed him. “So dramatic.” The smell of pancakes cooking caused a crowd around the table. Excitement filled the air as the boys looked at the pancakes. “We missed good pancakes.” “Hey!” “Sorry, hyung.” You laughed at Wooyoung and Hongjoong’s banter. “Eat up guys.” No movement was made. “We need a picture of you with your pancakes.” You did nothing but smile for the picture. After that click was heard and an okay came from Mingi, the boys didn’t hesitate to go for the food.

Within an hour, all the pancakes were gone. “That’s yummy in my tummy!” “Aww, San is so cute!” “Stop, Wooyoung!” Wooyoung shook his head no and teased San even more. “This photo will look good up on our wall of memories!” “First photo since the accident.” The boys were chattering happily. “What happened to me?” You whispered softly, almost afraid to ask. The noise died down and the boys looked at you with sadness in their eyes. Mingi spoke up. “You were at a gymnastics competition and you were winning. A girl got jealous and put stuff on the balance beam before your turn. Of course you were last so no one else would get hurt. Going for the final round off and flip to exit off the beam, you slipped and hit your head. At the hospital, you had a seizure and you lost your memory.”

“But you are gaining it back!” Yeosang tried to lighten the dark news. “Yeah, that’s good news…” You put on a fake smile. “I guess.” Deep down, you wanted to cry and have someone hold you tight. “I’m going to go shower.” Everyone looked concerned but you were already off to the shower. The water was warm when it hit your back. You drew with the suds against the wall. Angry, you finished your shower and threw on leggings and a shirt. After blow drying your hair, you put it up and went outside. “Let’s see how much I can remember.” You were stretching when San saw you through the window. “GUYS COME HERE.” Everyone was waiting to watch you, scared. You did a basic cartwheel and it felt good. Then, you did a handspring and laughed. Taking a running start, you did a round off into a back handspring, to a double twist and landed perfectly.

The boys cheered even though you couldn’t hear them. Filled with exhilaration, you got up on the balance beam. Starting slow, you did a handstand into the splits. Flipping yourself back up, you did more flips and tricks. You landed on the ground gracefully and bowed to your imaginary crowd. Immediately you got embarrassed when the boys came out. “Did you see that!” “You did amazing!” Happily, you made your way to the trampoline when your brother stopped you. “You were struggling with the trampoline and kept hurting yourself, please don’t.” “I feel like I have to do this. Just to try it out.” He let go of you and watched you perform tricks perfectly whereas before, you could barely get a backflip in. You landed and stopped yourself.

You did the back twist but couldn’t get your feet down in time so you landed on your stomach. “FUCK!” Once again, you got up to do the trick again. Again, you failed. Sighing, you took a break and sat on the trampoline. A memory popped up in your photos and you watched the video. “You got this, sis!” “Mingi, catch me!” You fell and he caught you. “That was a good back handspring! You’re getting better on the balance beam.” “I did it for you.” Another video popped up. “Now announcing contestant 478.” You powdered your hands and perfectly executed your routine. Now it was time to see who goes to the finals. “And in first place to the finals is number 478!” You ran to Mingi and your boyfriend who kissed you. “You’re so amazing!” Smiling, you put your phone to the side and kept trying until you got the tricks down.

Smiling brightly, you stood on the edge of the trampoline. “I REMEMBER!” You stumbled a bit and couldn’t catch yourself. “MINGI!!” He leaped forward and caught you. “You said my name!” The smile on Mingi’s face was from ear to ear. He sat you down and you walked over to Seonghwa. “In my memory, you kissed me. I remember but I can’t remember your name for now. Please don’t tell me. I want to learn it.” Seonghwa nodded but was dying inside. It hurt him that you don’t remember his name. He wanted to hold you and kiss you again.

After the fun in the yard, you went inside and sat on the couch. Yunho plopped down next to you. “I remember the day we met. You were practicing for your gymnastics competition and you accidentally ran into me. I was new to the area and was nervous. You bought me ice cream with chocolate sprinkles. My favorite part was you introducing me to your friend group. Best decision I ever made was to go to the ice cream parlor with a stranger.” You laughed and listened. It was a cute story you thought.

“Come on, you can do this!” You were encouraging yourself. Then you started to do your practice routine. For the finale you landed and turned right into an unexpected passerby who fell. “ARE YOU OKAY?! I AM SO SORRY.” The boy shyly smiled at you. Politely, you offered your hand to which he took. “I’m ____!” “I-I’m Yunho.” “You don’t look familiar.” “I just moved here.” You perked up. “Let me take you to get some ice cream! To say sorry and as a new step in a possible friendship.” That was the first time Yunho had smiled in ages. “Okay!” The two of you talked until you got to the ice cream parlor. As soon as you had your ice creams, you walked with him to your house. ”I want you to meet my brother.” The door opened and your brother appeared with the trash. “Mingi, this is Yunho my friend. Yunho, this is my brother, Mingi.” There was an awkward silence.

“There was a tension between you and Mingi.” “Ah, you’re remembering me!” He ruffled your hair. “YAH, YUNHO!” Yunho got up ready to run. You chased him around the living room laughing. “Get back here!” “Never!” Out of breath, you both threw yourself onto the couch. A smile covered your face. You couldn’t help it. These boys brought you happy memories and they make you happy, even if you can only remember a few. A movie was turned on by one of the boys and you fell into the film. Dozing off was hard to not do but you found yourself doing it anyway. Finally, sleep took over and you were out cold. Seonghwa bid goodnight and carried you to bed.

You have decided that the sun is holding a grudge against you. It’s like it is its mission to blind you and so far, it is working. Lazy day today you thought. You dragged yourself out of bed and into the closet. The boys had left to go do something so you decided to do nothing. There it was sticking out like a person wearing neon orange. The dress laid alone in the corner almost begging you to put it on. Ultimately, you took it to the bathroom and slipped it on. You twirled and watched the bottom flare out.

“Wah, you are so pretty!” “Thanks, Wooyoung!” Mingi beckoned you over for a picture. You had been going out with Seonghwa for three months and he had asked you to Homecoming. Seonghwa wrapped his arm around your waist and stood beside you beaming. The music was blaring and pretty much everyone was either making out or grinding. You simply danced with Seonghwa. “I love this song.” He grabbed your hand and started to slow dance with you. You were distracted. As the song ended, you looked up. “Seonghwa?” He looked at you. “I love you.” It was as if he’d won the lottery. “I love you too!” Without thinking, he kissed you and the two of you got lost in the moment.

“WE’RE HOME!” You raced out and hugged Seonghwa. “W-What is this?” You said nothing, instead, you grabbed his shirt and pulled him down for a kiss. “I fucking love you so much, Seonghwa.” After the shock wore away, he kissed you again. This time deeper. When he pulled away out of breath he couldn’t help but smile. “I love you so much too!” He looked at you again and realized that you were wearing your homecoming dress. “That is my favorite memory of us.” “Mine too, Seonghwa. Mine too.” Finally, you had remembered everyone but you got hit with one last memory. This one had all of you.

Mingi stood there crying and you couldn’t help but let a few tears fall either. The nine of you watched as the funeral home buried your parents. You remembered the fact that they were just home smiling and leaving for date night. “Bye guys. Have fun!” “You too mom except, don’t have too much fun.” Horror hit you as every mean thing you have ever said to them flashed through your mind. How you wished you could take it back. The few tears turned into uncontrollable sobs. You couldn’t stand, it hurt too much. Anger and sadness controlled your emotions and you ran out into traffic. Arms wrapped around you but you pulled away and looked at Seonghwa angrily. “Come back to me. Stay with me.”

#ateez #ateez fluff #ateez mingi #ateez hongjoong #ateez wooyoung #ateez san #ateez yunho #ateez yeosang #ateez jongho #ateez seonghwa #wooyoung #mingi #hongjoong #seonghwa #yunho #jongho #yeosang #choi san

[wheremytwinwatches]

[Where My Twin Watches]: Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood Episode 16

Work continues to drive me crazy, so of course I make my life more complicated by getting online classes set up for the fall. That, and I kinda don’t want to see our babies learn about Hughes. Blissful ignorance, am I right? *sigh* Onwards with Brotherhood.

Do we have captions this time? We do! Awesome, it was so irritating last time not knowing if I was mangling names or not. We’ve got the second intro featuring the Xing contingent, curious how influential it’ll be having a foreign prince bopping along with the Elrics. (Also, I continue to be juvenile and giggle at one of the lyrics in the new song being “shite”. Hee.) We open up with a bird's-eye view of Central, then with Ed yawning at the train station. Al mentions that being spied on for hours is pretty tiring. Right, Ling’s ninja squad don’t trust the Elrics. But where’s the Prince? The Ninjas proceed to freak the heck out, Fu runs around the traintops calling out for the young lord as Lan Fan worries about him collapsing. Is Ling fainting a common thing, then? Ed just shrugs his shoulders at the absence of the freeloader and heads off with Al and Winry. Huh, music’s getting ominous. Oh, there he is, doing a Brooding Anime Rooftop Stare on the station’s clock tower, looking towards the center of the city. [Ling]: “Something about this country doesn’t feel right.” Well, the current speculation (backed by the freaking Fuhrer being a Goth!) is that they’re sacrificing people to make Philosopher’s Stones, so… don’t know much about Xing so can’t say if they’re any better, but it’d be pretty hard for them to be worse. Episode 16 - “Footsteps of a Comrade-in-Arms” In a run-down area of the city, a car stops and the blond-haired smoking guy (Havoc?) of Roy’s crew is checking in with the grey-haired member (I’ll get their names some day, I swear), dropping off food from the colonel. Oh, guess Grey’s been guarding Barry, who cheerfully recognizes “the smokin’ guy”. Not tied up and playing chess? Are they keeping him prisoner to try and get more info or more protecting their only source? Well, I suppose for a serial killer like Barry being kept inside at night and denied any chances to chop someone up would be uncomfortable. Still, Grey’s bored with the assignment, asks how much longer it’ll be. Havoc just says that Roy apologizes for the dangerous assignment, that Grey’s absence it being treated as sick leave… and if he’s seen in public by anyone he’ll get court-martialed. Yikes, ok then. No breaks for poor Grey. Any good news? [Havoc]: “Falman, I found myself a girlfriend!” ...well that’s nice and all for you, buddy, but I think Falman (thank you!) was looking for good news for him. Poor, poor Falman. Hey, it’s Ling! Taking another impromptu nap? A couple of cops are asking if he’s ok, he whispers about food… ah, trying for another free meal? Unfortunately for Ling, the cops less interested in feeding him and more interested in seeing his entry visa. Cue irritated cops dragging a crying Prince away. [Cop 1]: “Outta the way, everyone!” [Cop 2]: “Illegal alien coming through!” The Ninjas continue to freak over the absent master, while Ed says that they should stop by the military offices. Winry… decides to go straight to the Hughes’ house. Oh boy. [Winry]: “I can’t wait to see Miss Gracia and cute little Elicia!” Uuuuuugh. Make it stooooop. The Brothers are off to meet up with Hughes himself, while they think Hughes might have been stymied by Bradley’s orders to stand down they have info on the Homunculi now (and still don’t know the Fuhrer himself is one, gah!). Off to the court-martial office! Quiet somber music as the brothers run through the park. And right by the phone booth that Hughes was murdered in. Bleh this episode is not going easy. In the office, Sheska’s carrying around some books when another lady officer asks for a key to Room #3. Which freaks Sheska out, and she babbles about cleaning up the mess first? What, have you made that your private reading lair or something? Nope, not your lair it seems, but Colonel Mustang’s private napping chamber. Yikes, hope you had an alarm set, and it only wasn’t Sheska waking you that kept you from being late to a freaking Council Meeting. Wait, Council? I don’t think I’ve heard of that group before, I’m just assuming by the tendency for Anime Councils to be Big Deals that it’s the same in the FMA universe. The highest-ranking officers of the military? Sheska worries that Roy’s not getting enough sleep, he just waves her off and goes to the meeting. Staying up late doing research on the conspiracy, I gue- GAH new voice! Sheska freaks and identifies them as Captain Focker, who asks about the open storeroom and what Roy was doing. Uh oh, a watcher sent by Bradley? Double uh oh, in her concern for Roy’s state Sheska is telling Focker about how he seems to be researching the Fifth Laboratory. And the Hughes case. Bleeeeeh, more Hughes feels as Sheska gets sad about her getting her job through Hughes. Captain Focker walks away deep in thought, glasses obscuring his eyes. Uh oh. But then the looks up in surpr- That’s Captain Focker! Oh my Leto, that’s the real Captain Focker! Real Focker’s too busy looking at some piece of paper to notice a shapechange and red electricity as Envy takes on a new disguise. Shapeshifters: A security nightmare.

But it looks like Envy might have made a mistake, as Real!Focker’s now saying good morning to Sheska, who is rightly confused. A simple “Laugh at this clueless character” moment, or a break for the good guys? Roy’s washing up in a bathroom for this Council Meeting, takes a moment to stare mournfully into the mirror- until with a flush of a toilet his angsting is interrupted by The Mighty Armstrong, glinting manfully in his bandages while towering over the stall door. Hah! Armstrong remarks that Roy looks a bit peakish, who asks why Armstrong is bandaged. Oh right, Armstrong was involved in killing all of Greed’s human-chimera crew down South. He mentions that he ran into the Elrics down there, on their visit to their old teacher. But he couldn’t bring himself to tell them about Hughes. Armstrong makes his way out- [Roy]: “The Fifth Laboratory and the Philosopher’s Stone; the Stone’s key ingredients are live humans.” Armstrong comes to a halt. Roy continues about how Hughes died following up on the Elric brothers’ investigation, and how if/when they find out they’ll blame themselves. He says Armstrong not telling them was kind, and Armstrong compliments him on figuring out so much. But warns him that he never knows who might be listening. Riza’s waiting out in the hallway when Ed walks up and says hi, although he’s not as happy when Roy joins them. Oh yeah, Elric didn’t know about Roy’s promotion. Now if he’s hanging out in Central it’ll be the same place as good old Colonel Mustang. The sarcasm in Ed’s “Great” is astounding. As for the Elrics, they’re just doing some information gathering. And might pay Hughes a visit later in the day. Where is he, anyway? Roy… says that Hughes retired. Went out to the country with his family to run the family business. Really, dude? I get that it’s a sore subject, but the “he went out to the farm” excuse only works for so long. They deserve to know what happened. Well, with the false story the boys think that they should tell Winry, they spin around only to run into Lieutenant Ross. She asks about the rush, Ed mentions that they heard about Hughes… and Ross isn’t in on the “tell them the farm story” excuse. Oh boy. Uuuugh, the two conversations sliding right past each other here is painful! And here’s the kicker: [Al]: “He retired to the country and they promoted him?” Ross realises she did a no-no, covers her mouth to keep from saying anything else. And Ed realizes the truth. Mid-episode cards: Captain Focker with an Envy silhouette behind him, and a downcast Gracia Hughes on the second. Notable for both Narrator “Full-Metal Alchemists” being the sad, somber one. Out in the city, Winry’s shopping for apples, presumably to give to the Hughes’ family. And Ed races out of the building after hearing the new. [Lt. Ross]: “Brigadier General Hughes is dead… He was murdered shortly after you were discharged from the hospital, Edward. I’m afraid we still haven’t found the person responsible.” As he runs and cries, Ed blames himself for pulling Hughes into the investigation. Flashes of Happy Hughes and his family, a memory of Hughes seeing them off at the train station and inviting them to drop by again, hosting dinner, first meeting them and inviting them to his home… Al catches up with the suitcase and then stands there silently as Ed slumps against the wall. And now we’re with Winry, who’s arriving at the apartment. The door swings open- [Elicia]: “Daddy?!” Oh no, that’s fine. I didn’t need that heart anyway, go ahead and use it as a footrest show. The Elrics have arrived at the apartment building, when Al asks what they should do Ed tells him to go back, that he’s “the only one who has to take the blame for what happened.” Oh my Leto kid you have enough self-imposed guilt from Mama Elric and Nina, stop taking the weight of the world on your shoulders! Al argues that it’s on both of them, and double all my protests that Ed does not deserve this for his little brother as well. Ed tries to dissuade Al again- [Al]: “We made up our minds; We said we were getting our bodies back, no matter what. But if people are going to die because of that… then I don’t want mine back.”

Freaking A, Al. I cannot overstate how much damn respect I feel for you right now. You are a poor boy, trapped in a cold metal body from a horrible accident. Getting your body back has been your driving purpose, along with healing your brother. But when you discovered that the cost of making a Philosopher’s Stone was human sacrifice, you discarded the method. And when you discover that a friend has died in the process of helping your investigation, you are fully prepared to renounce your goal in order to protect others. I salute your selflessness. Gracia opens the door, and gives the Elrics the same sad smile that she gave Winry, telling the brothers that Winry’s already arrived. The mechanic’s sitting quietly in a chair with Elicia curled in her lap, she looks up with Ed quietly enters. Ed then asks to talk to Gracia and Winry about Maes. The quiet sad theme starts playing as Gracia recaps the Elrics’ message; that Hughes looked into the Philosopher’s Stone, and was killed as a warning against the brothers. Gracia looks down at sleeping Elicia, as Ed bows his head in grief and gasps out “sorry” again and again. [Gracia]: “That would be just like him, dying while trying to help someone else.” The Trio look up in surprise. [Gracia]: “My husband. He always was a busybody and a meddler, and it got him into trouble. A lot. But you know… I don’t think he ever had regrets. Not any… not even in his dying moments, Edward.” So many people to respect in this episode, seriously. Al being prepared to give up on getting his body back, and Gracia insisting that they can’t give up, or else Hughes died in vain. With a little smile, even. Forget about the dead end of the Stone, there still might be another way. [Gracia]: “You boys have to keep moving forward… any way you can.” The door closes as the Trio exit the apartment, Ed turns to look at the others- [Elicia]: “Mommy?... Mommy, please don’t cry.” ...damn you, show. Later in the day now, the sun is setting as the Trio walk through the streets to a sweeping cello melody. The Elrics see Winry to a hotel room, and then go to their own. Right, because they… used to stay at the Hughes’ residence. Winry’s quietly resting on her bed, Al’s sitting in the living room, and Ed’s downstairs in the restaurant too upset to eat. Now he’s knocking on Winry’s door, asking if she’s eaten yet, and she should hurry because the dining room is closing soon. The parallels are strong here: when they were children the Rockbell’s fed the Elrics, and now Ed’s trying to make sure Winry keeps up her strength now. When Winry doesn’t make a move Ed excuses himself to his room, but Winry grabs his automail hand. Aw, aw no. She still has the basket of apples she was planning to take to the Hughes’ family. Seems she was planning to make apple pie. And had hoped that Mr. Hughes would get to try some too. Winry cries as the screen fades to black. WOW OK talk about rough transitions, we’ve got Chimeras in cages. And eff you it’s the Goths, Lust leaning on Gluttony as she talks with still-disguised Envy. Now they know that Roy’s been looking into the matter, and may have found some things out. Lust gripes that they orchestrated Roy’s move to Central to keep a closer eye on him, and it’d be a waste to lose an important sacrifice candidate. Wait… [Envy]: “Haven’t been able to learn anything from your new boyfriend?” Aw hell no, I’d thought that Havoc gushing about having a girlfriend was just a little joke at the beginning of the episode, like a running gag about his relationships or something. You’re telling me Lust is playing Havoc? Run dude, run! Lust goes off to gather more info, calls for Gluttony like a loyal little attack dog. Envy chides Gluttony for leaving some bones scattered around… but then gets an idea. Uh oh, we’ve got string music as Envy suggests making another “play”, giving Roy a bone to chew. What are you up to? We’re at what appears to be a cafeteria now, when someone comes up and taps Lieutenant Ross on the shoulder, introducing himself as Henry Douglas from the Provost Marshal’s office. Flanked by goons, he says that Ross has to come along with them, and demands her gun? Wait, is Ross being arrested? Brosh, where the heck are you, come defend your partner! Whoa whoa what?! They’re accusing Ross for Hughes’ murder?! What the heck, how can you make that claim? What evidence do you have for that absurd claim? Besides… well, besides the shapeshifter accosting Hughes in the phone booth while looking like you… uh oh. Riza is updating Roy on the situation, saying that Ross (man, there are a lot of R-characters involved in this case, huh?) is pleading not-guilty on all charges. The Flame Alchemist just tells Riza to gather all the info on the suspect that she can, secretly. Dramatic string music continues as we see Havoc buying some flowers and then running along to his “hot date”, stubbing out his cigarette as yup, “Solaris” is Lust. Who demurely asks Havoc to sit down and tell her about his day. AAAAAAARGH! Ok then! Was putting off this episode because I knew there would be Feels about Hughes, and damn if it didn’t deliver. But like Gracia said, they can’t let Hughes’ death be in vain, and they can hardly just give up and let the killer go free. Speaking of, framing Ross? As if I didn’t have enough reasons to hate you jerks, Goths! Ugh, this is gonna get complicated, isn’t it?

#wmtw #where my twin watches #ranubis #full metal alchemist #full metal alchemist brotherhood #fmab #fmab 16

[yeontanismypresident]

Pregnant | Jungkook

A/N: Thanks for requesting love, hope it’s what you wanted! 

Words: 1.6K

It was a Saturday, a day off for the boys, when you woke up at nine in the morning. You were cuddled up next to Jungkook in his bed at the dorms, staring at his sleeping face. He looked so peaceful and at ease that you didn’t want to wake him up, but your stomach had other ideas.Not even half an hour had passed when you started feeling nauseous You ran to the bathroom, emptying your stomach's contents. Jungkook had heard you from the bed and sat up.

“Y/n? Are you okay?” he called out to you as he came to hold your hair out of the way. He rubbed your back as you continued to lean over the toilet.

Getting up and flushing the toilet you turned towards your concerned boyfriend, “Yeah I’m fine, just got sick a little is all. Don’t worry.” You grabbed the toothbrush you leave here for when you stay and start to brush your teeth. You could brush all of the sickness off, but Jungkook on the other hand was getting increasingly worried. He wasn’t afraid to voice it either, “Baby this is the third day in a row that you’ve thrown up.” He followed you as you walked to the living room, seeing only Taehyung and Jimin up.

The smell of bacon cooking made you feel sick to the stomach and you tried to hold the feeling in. Yet your attempt at acting like everything was fine failed when once again you were rushing towards the bathroom. Jungkook sighed as he went to make sure you were okay. He hated seeing you like this and he felt even worse because he didn’t know what to do.

Jimin saw Taehyung in deep thought and questioned what he was thinking so hard about, “Why do you have that look on your face? What’s running through your head?” He didn’t receive an answer causing him to shrug and turn back to the stove. He had more important things to do than wait for Taehyung to speak: Making sure the bacon didn’t burn.

It was only five minutes later when Taehyung finally voiced his thoughts, “What if she’s pregnant?” The question made Jimin whip around to stare at his younger friend in confusion. They didn’t notice the Maknae standing in the doorway and before Jimin could ask Jungkook beat him to it, “What do you mean by that Hyung?” Even though his voice was faint, it still had the power to startle his two Hyungs.

“Fuck Jungkook you can’t do that!” Jimin scolded him as he held his hand over his chest where his heart was, “I could’ve had a heart attack!”

Jungkook didn’t pay him any mind, all of his attention on Taehyung and wanting to know what made his friend say that. Right as Taehyung was going to answer, Jin came running in, “Why is there smoke filling the whole dorms!?” It was then the three younger boys had taken notice of the smoke billowing throughout the kitchen and into other parts of the apartment. “And why the hell isn’t the smoke alarm working!?” Jin pulled the smoke alarm off the wall and checked the back, only to see no batteries in it. As he opened some windows and turned the fan on he kept muttering something along the lines of ‘fucking Namjoon always forgetting to change the batteries’. They all became so caught up in trying to get rid of the smoke that they forgot all about their previous conversation.

--0--0--0--0--

A week later and you were still getting sick. Jungkook could only watch as you continued to throw up all of your dinner from the night before. A curious and concern glint could be seen in his eyes every time he watched you. Whenever he asked you to go to the doctor you would just reply with, ‘It’s just the flu. It’ll go away soon.’

“Y/n please go to the doctor’s. This has been going on for two weeks already!” Anyone could tell Jungkook was getting worried about you by the way his voice betrayed his calm exterior.

You sat down on his bed and just rolled your eyes, “I already told you Jungkook it’s just the flu! It’s going to go away soon!” For some reason you were starting to get all emotional. Frustration and sadness creeping up on you. For what reason you had no clue. Jungkook, on the other hand, had a good idea as to why. He was getting so frustrated that you weren’t even caring that he just blurted out, “Are you pregnant?”

“What?” you gave him a blank face and your voice was monotone as you spoke. He realized what he said and looked at you hesitantly. Seeing his mouth open as to speak, you beat him to it, “Did you just ask me if I’m pregnant?”

“Think about it baby. You’re always getting sick in the morning, you’re almost always hungry and craving weird things. Like who actually enjoys hot cheetos dipped in some strawberry yogurt?” he started to go off and rant, his voice picking up speed as well as going up an octave. You could tell he was getting anxious and nervous about how you would react, but you couldn’t help but to question it. Were you pregnant?

As he was still going off on how you were still beautiful even if you were starting to eat a lot, you got up and walked out of his room. He stopped short and just stared at where you once sat. Quickly coming to the realization that you weren’t in the room anymore, he ran out to see you putting your shoes on.

The rest of the boys watched on as Jungkook grabbed your wrist lightly, “Where are you going?” You gently tugged your wrist out of his grasp, opening the front door, “I just need some time to think.” Jungkook could only watch as you walked away from him, his heart dropping as he thought of everything he had said. Why did he have to blurt out that idea? Why couldn’t he have kept his thoughts to himself? He grabbed at his hair and sank to his knees, not noticing his friend come over to him.

Taehyung  pulled Jungkook up and brought him over to the couch, “Are you okay Jungkook-ah?” All Jungkook could do was stare at the wall opposite of him making the rest of his band members stare at him with sympathy in their gaze.

--0--0--0--0--

You couldn’t believe you were actually doing this. The pregnancy test in your hand shook as your nerves started. Doing as the instructions told you, you waited five minutes and they felt like hours. When your timer went off you jumped, too lost in your thoughts on what would happen if it were positive. Oh god would Jungkook leave you? Would he want you to have an abortion? Would you get an abortion just to stay with him? The answer was clear to you as you unconsciously held a hand on your abdomen. No matter what the outcome was, you were keeping the little angel that was growing inside of you.

Shakily picking up the test you clasped a hand over your mouth as tears streamed down your face. It was positive. Grabbing your phone you clicked on Jungkook’s contact and tried to hold in your sobs. When he answered the call you couldn’t hold in the wails coming out of you.

“Y/n!? Are you okay!? What’s wrong!?” his voice was frantic as he heard your crying on the other end of the phone. It took you a little while to calm down enough to talk, “Can you please come here? We need to talk.” Getting an ‘okay’ from him, you hung up and continued to cry as you pulled your knees to your chest.

Jungkook’s heart was racing as he ran all the way to your place. Were you breaking up with him? Were you okay? All of these thoughts were still rushing around his head when he showed up at your door. He used the spare key you gave him and walked in, hearing your cries from the bathroom. He knocked on the door softly, “Y/n? Baby, can I come in?” A small and faint reply came from the other side of the door.

He pushed the door open slowly and saw you sat on the floor against the wall. He crouched in front of you and wiped your tears gently off with the ends of his hoodie.

“Please don’t leave me,” your voice was quiet and shaking with nerves.

He shook his head and pulled you into his warm embrace, “Never.”

You pulled your head away from his chest and looked at the door behind him, “Jungkook..I’m pregnant.” You could hear as well as feel his breath hitch. You couldn’t bear to see the judgement in his gaze, so you kept your eyes away from his.

“Hey, look at me baby girl,” his fingers held your chin delicately, turning your head towards him, his eyes calm and loving, “I’d never leave you, especially not over this. We may be young, but I’m certain I want a family with you. You’re the one I want to marry in the future.” He saw your eyes swell up with even more tears, this time happy, and gave you a feather like kiss on your lips. Gaze falling onto your non existent bump he put a hand over it, “And this little bean in here is ours. Made from our love. I wouldn’t want to have this child with anyone else.”

You looked at him with so much love in your eyes that it made his heart beat faster, “I love you so much Kookie.”

Happy tears filled his eyes as he gave you a passionate kiss, “I love you too Y/n.”

#BTS jungkook #jeon jungkook #bts jeon jungkook #jeongguk #jeongguk x reader #jeongguk x you #jeon jeongguk #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #bts imagines #bts reactions #bts fluff #jungkook fluff #bts fluff imagines #jungkook x reader insert #bts insert #bts x you #bts x reader

[gii-heylittleangel]

SPN Coda 15x06 - “Golden Time”

Hello! So, what about last night’s episode, huh? I’m so happy Eileen’s back and I may have cried when she and Sam hugged. I just hope she stays for a long while and that they don’t screw her over. And my baby Cas is back and that’s just awesome, I was missing him. 

As always, Cas is in the coda cause it wouldn’t be me if he wasn’t haha. I hope you enjoy the coda and let me know what you think!

Read it on AO3 or keep reading here!

Castiel makes sure that Melly and Caleb are back home okay before he goes back to the cabin. It’s almost dark by then, the sun slowly setting down on the horizon, painting the sky in pink and purple. The shut curtain doesn’t let much of the last daylight inside the room, so Castiel turns the light on as he drops his trenchcoat on the chair by the door with a sigh. He lets himself sink into the chair, burying his head in his hands with closed eyes. His hands are still sticky with the djin’s blood and the smell of copper is strong, leaving a metallic taste on his mouth. Castiel lowers his hands to stare at them, the dark red stains on them in contrast with his skin. They shake slightly and Castiel closes them in fists to stop it as he closes his eyes.

With his eyes closed, Castiel rewatches himself killing them djin, the angel blade stabbing its chest loudly, the noise of skin being torn apart all Castiel can hear, the smell of blood even stronger than before. He opens his eyes with his breath caught in his throat, trying to get rid of the image. Pushing himself from the chair, Castiel makes his way to the mirror in the bathroom, staring at himself in front of it; his shirt has bullet holes from the shot, his blood around them, and more blood spattered on the rest of it, up until his neck, but from the djin. He feels sick as he stares at the blood, bile rising up his throat, and he has to rush to the toilet as his stomach empties itself, nothing but liquid coming out of it.

He rests his head on his arms as he breathes in deeply, eyes closed, exhaling through his mouth. Castiel loses track of time as he breathes, the cold tiles sending shivers through his body, his knees hurting from the hard surface. His stomach still revolves in itself, nothing more to throw out, and his grace is barely enough to keep him from passing out. He can even feel where the bullets wounded him, a phantom ache in them, even though Castiel managed to heal the wounds.

Castiel finally pushes himself up, flushing the contents away and turning to the sink. He stares at himself in the mirror again, his face pale, dark bags under his eyes, his forehead shining with cold sweat, and cheeks hollow. In a matter of hours, he managed to look incredibly sick. He gets rid of his suit, throwing it on the floor, his tie and shirt following right after. Castiel turns the tap on, splashing water on his face. He cleans the blood from his neck and his chest, the marks of the wounds looking desperately new, as if they had just started to heal. He sighs as he turns the tap off, water dripping from his hair onto his shoulders.

Turning the light off, he walks back to the room, sitting on the edge of the bed. He stares at his phone on the nightstand as if it would grow a head and a mouth and eat him if he wasn’t careful. It was silent for a few days now, not even Sam’s texts or voicemails anymore. Castiel has a feeling that Dean probably managed to convince Sam to stop bothering him or Sam finally realized Castiel wasn’t going to answer him. But Dean’s words come back to him, talking about how Chuck’s still there. It fills him with sadness and anger, knowing that Chuck may still be finding a way to try and control them. It also makes Castiel wonder if everything Dean said before Castiel left the bunker were truly his words or if it was just Chuck manipulating them.

Castiel shakes his head, taking those thoughts out of his mind. Doesn’t matter if it was truly Dean or not. It doesn’t excuse everything he said to me and I guess it doesn’t make a difference to Dean, anyway. He certainly doesn’t seem to need me. He grabs his phone with a sigh, unlocking it and opening his texts. There are a lot from Sam, all of them asking where Castiel is, if he’s okay, and that they need to talk. There is one talking about Chuck and Lilith and for Castiel to be careful.

His phone rings and Sam’s name appears in it. Castiel holds it tightly, staring at the screen as it rings, breath held in his throat. He only lets it out when the call goes to voicemail and it isn’t long before the notification appears. He clicks on it, pressing the phone against his ear with closed eyes. Sam’s tired voice comes soon, Hey, Cas, just checking in. Dean said you were probably working on a case because he got a call on the FBI phone. Hope everything went okay and that you managed to get the monster. If you need any help, you know you can ask, I’ll be happy to help you. Uhm, I actually have some good news. I don’t know if you remember Eileen but we managed to bring her back today with one of Rowena’s spell. That’s a win, right? Sam chuckles softly and stays silent for a while, though Castiel can hear him breathing and muttering under his breath. But, seriously Cas, I wanted to make sure you’re okay. You haven’t answered any of my calls or texts, and I don’t even know if you’re actually getting them. I was worried you were hurt or something like it. I, uh, I don’t know what Dean said to you but I know my brother and I’m sure it wasn’t anything good. But you’ll always be welcome here, you know that, right? Doesn’t matter what Dean says or does, the bunker is your home too and I don’t want you to ever think it isn’t. It’s as much of ours as it is yours, and it would be nice to have you back. Just… think about it, okay? Anyway, I hope you’re okay and be careful, okay? We don’t know what Chuck or Lilith are planning but it can’t be good. Call me if you need anything.

Castiel lets the phone fall from his hands as he buries his head in them, tears welling up in his eyes. He doesn’t know if he should feel better or worse with Sam’s words, but it hurts to hear him saying that he’s welcomed there. Castiel knows Sam means well but he probably doesn’t know what Dean said, and, even though there’s nothing more Castiel wants to do than go back to the bunker, he knows he can’t; not yet anyway. He knows he can’t face Dean and he doesn’t want to put Sam in the middle of the crossfire. It’s best for him to stay away for a while and if Chuck’s still there, then Castiel has something to do.

He stands up to grab his laptop, turning it on and sitting at the table. His powers may be falling and he may not have a home for now, but Castiel can find Chuck or Lilith and find a way to beat them. Castiel is a hunter and this is just another job. He can and will do this, no matter what it takes.

#littleangelwrites #spn coda #spn spoilers #spoilers 15x06 #coda 15x06 #castiel

[belovasangel]

Au Lait .End

Summary: Some hero’s hide between the pages of their novels, and the ones who need saving are those who read. 

Pairing: Mob!Shawn x (fem)Reader

Warnings: Blood, swearing, mention of murder, anxiety, angst to fluff, happy ending

A/N: Thank you for reading my first full series! Also this part is really long and I’m super proud of myself.

Start from the beginning

Are final chapters good or bad?

Typically, most fairytales end with an uplifting tone and moral of the story. The princess is swept off her feet and taken to their happily ever after to live with the prince who saved her. It gives a positive outlook to children, the desired audience, that life is worth living. Love is the end goal, as it heals wounds and should keep you going to fulfill your limited time on earth. Our life is something we want ever since we read about it at bedtime, hoping and praying to the universe that our prince charming may come one day. 

Yet, some end with a bitter bite instead. We feel remorse and anger towards the lack of happiness at the end. As we progress from childhood fiction to adult novels, the dialect changes to something that scars us all. Tips on how to survive a fire, to get out of a sinking car, or how to get away with murder. Our television shows shut out the crowns and love, and instead thrusts real life horrors that may happen one day. 

We are taught later, that love comes with a cost. It isn’t as simple as waking up with a kiss, or being saved from a house of seven mini men. Maybe it doesn’t come at all, and we have to learn with that being okay. Or, even worse, love is taken from us, shredded at tender touches and whispers turning in the wind. 

Shawn wasn’t ready to say goodbye. 

As he watched Andrew lock the door, still unnoticed, he began picturing a life where this wasn’t the scenario. One where you two lived on the countryside, living alongside a cat and a few children. A life which Shawn would wrap his tattoo’d and scarred hands along your baby bump, watching the little butterfly kick in response. Where your skin glowed in the beautiful light and he finally learned how to braid hair. 

But this wasn’t a silly fiction book. This was your life. And future. 

Shawn stayed low to the concrete, crawling towards the nearby alleyway to tuck away. Once he had space and safety, he stood up and began running alongside the brick walls, looking up and round for any sort of door. A staircase. Anything to get in. Shawn noticed the fire escape quickly, feeling his heart skip a beat, at the hope he suddenly found. He kept the phone tight to his face, knuckles white from tension. 

“Yeah, well, I didn’t hurt your family, and all I did was put a few holes in your men. Water under the bridge, am I right? However, I never promised that I wouldn’t touch such beautiful,” Andrew paused. Shawn heard your whimper. “Beautiful, woman. Say, does Shawn tell you about what he does?”

Shawn let out a throaty growl after hearing you whine out. He seethed red, readying to punch the taunting brick between him. “Get away from her, she has no business with me.” He put the phone quickly in his pocket, and swiftly jumped up to reach the fire escape. Somehow, being six foot was just enough to give a leg up. As fast as he jumped, Shawn put the phone back to his ear, barreling up the stairs to your store. 

“She’s making you cowardly, Mendes. You kill people! Sell drugs, murder families, take candy from fucking babies, yet somehow a damn nerd found a way to change your mind. You should have fucking killed me when you had the chance!”

Shawn shook his head, hopping window to window in search of the novels and bookshelves. “You don’t know shit about her, Andrew. All you know is her damn store, she was taught to read books, not loads rifles. She doesn’t know my life, she doesn’t know who the fuck you are! Do not get her involved. Get out before you’ll regret it.”

Once he found the window to the second floor of your store, he opened the window, thanking the universe for it being open, and quietly flung himself in. He didn’t care he left it open, or that he was unarmed. All Shawn wanted was to hold you in his arms and shield you from the pain you were facing now. 

He had never been in this part of the store, where the little nook was hidden upstairs. You were right, this was perfect for kids. The colorful beanbags and small shelves of coloring books and crayons were good enough to have any kid entranced. Shawn wondered if you’d do this for your kids, too. 

There was a small clutter downstairs, and Shawn heard it on his phone as well. He quickly padded towards the stairs, peeking over the railing. All he saw was a mass behind the counter, one of your flying hair and struggling arms, and a large body forcefully whipping you around. Shawn barreled down the stairs, trying to get Andrew’s attention. 

“Hey! Get off-”

Pop. 

Shawn stopped, nearly tripping over his feet and biting his tongue. You stood still, body craning up towards the ceiling and head tilted back in a shocking gasp. The store was silent, nobody moved. The tears long forgotten in Shawn’s eyes suddenly slipped, his heart grasping for your hold. His own daydreams flew behind his mind, the one where you two got coffee, where he would have proposed, the wedding, a kid or two. Shawn had envisioned a whole life, and he dreamt of living his days with you, like the fairytale you were. 

But right now, all you craved was a fucking shower. Looking back in shock, your senses were distraught by gun smoke and something wet. As you slowly took a few steps backwards, the body of Andrew slid eerily down you, his blood staining the outfit you were clad in. He hit the ground in a dull thud, slowly surrounding himself in the thick murder you had just committed. The gun was hot in your clammy hands, so much that you let go of the burned handle and cradled your fingers close to your chest. 

You gasped for air, and Shawn was quick to get you outside. He sprinted to your side, easily throwing you into his arms and running for the door while you whimpered and cried into his neck. Shawn’s crisp collar of his shirt quickly absorbed the blood from your fingertips, staining little drops onto the linen. They were either blood, or your own tears. At this point, you were too damned to care.

About three stops down in the subway did you finally react to his touch, weakly squeezing his hand back and turning your head to hide from the lights on the platforms you passed. Everything felt numbed, your senses, thoughts, even the memory of what happened. Yet, when things became too foreign, you looked down to the crusted blood in your fingernails and it freshly pressed your mind again.

Hopping off the line and climbing stairs to the street did you realize you’d never told Shawn where you lived. In a different scenario, you would have laughed. He really did do his research when you two first met. Shawn quickly took your keys from your purse, when did he grab that, and placed it in the lock to your quaint house. Setting the keys down at the door, you led him to the bathroom.

Shawn really wanted to enjoy this moment, hell a small part of him was, but he’d have to push that back a while longer. He had killed and ravaged more families than book series in your store, so a little blood was never an issue for him. You, however, were crafted from J.K. Rowling herself and the most dangerous thing you could do was cut butter for your cinnamon-raison toast. ‘(Y/N)’ and ‘mobster’ were never in the same sentence, or even correlated, until tonight.

And the thought of you alongside him working in with his mafia made Shawn really, really desperate to push these imagines away for another time. Right now, you were centimeters from a panic attack if the remnants of Andrew weren’t scrubbed off. 

Shawn turned on the bathroom light and closed the door behind him. You sat down on the toilet, hunched over with a heavy head in your hands. Shawn admired the cleanliness of your little apartment. It was homey and loved, clearly with many book posters and loose novels along empty spaces. The bathroom was wood and marble, a few succulents and candled scattered. He gathered you must love Pottery Barn as well. Noted. 

You sniffed gently, wiping your eyes and looked up at Shawn. “I’m sorry I ruined the date.” Shawn slowly slipped to his knees, placing both his warm hands inside yours. “You didn’t ruin anything. Gave me a near heart attack, yes. But, you are perfectly okay, right? We didn’t know he would show up.” Shawn saw your eyes flinch at the mention of previous events, so he squeezed your hands in apology. 

“Do you want me to run you a bath?” With a curt nod, Shawn stood up and worked the shower, placing some soap in with the warm water. As it filled, you stood up and began taking off your jewelry, then shoes. Looking over at Shawn, the tips of his ears were red, and his cheeks were spreading in warmth. For the first time since leaving your store, you gave a small smile. “You know, when I imagined getting naked in front of you, this wasn’t the most ideal time I’d want it to happen.”

Shawn turned around slowly, eyebrows raised and a gentle smirk on his now flushed face. “Do you want me to leave?” You shook your head, a slightly bigger smile creeping onto your face. Tears flooded your eyes, some quickly falling. “I don’t want to be alone.”

He nodded, and slowly unbuttoned his shirt, you following suit. 

Shawn Mendes learned that night the most crucial lesson a book could teach you. He was taught that not everyone is strong, that they can crumble and fall. People can be sturdy, sarcastic, and overall bright and cheerful, yet when it’s time to be vulnerable, we all need someone to pick up the pieces. Shawn Mendes began to understand what it meant to love someone, even if he knew it before. 

And you learned not to fuck around with guns.

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes imagines #Shawn Mendes Imagine #mob!shawn #mob!shawn imagine #mob!shawn imagines #mob!shawn x reader #mob! imagine #mob!au #mob #au #shawn mendes au #shawn #mendes #shawn peter paul mendes #au lait

[atlas-of-a-human-soul]

Prank gone wrong (G.D.)

Summary: You had some pretty big news to share with your boyfriend Grayson, but little did you know, he had some news too.

Warnings: angst, but i promise fluff too

Word count: 1800

You were having a really long, hard day at the university and news that you had just gotten could be interpreted as both good and bad. All that you could focus on was your boyfriend Grayson and just how much you needed to be in his arms today. Whenever he held you, the world and all its troubles seemed to fade away, bringing some peace to your incredibly loud mind. You were an over thinker, but that might be an understatement. To be honest, anxiety would be the right term and it often brought you down. Before meeting Grayson, you were constantly second guessing yourself, hating the way you talk, the way you walk and most importantly the way you look. It's not something you're proud of, but confidence has always been an issue for you. Grayson helped with his constant compliments, kisses, hugs and daily validation. You never asked for it, he just did that on his own. Almost like he knew, like he could see what's inside your mind before even you did.

Walking into your shared apartment that was located right across the hall from Ethan, you threw the keys onto the counter with a heavy sigh. You kicked your heels off, rubbing your feet to soothe the ache that had settled after a long day in uncomfortable shoes that Grayson always said you didn't need, but they were pretty and you could never resist them.

„Grayson, I'm home!“ You called out, slowly making your way to the living room. You put on a smile for him, so he wouldn't freak out before you told him what you needed to say. Furrowing your eyebrows at the lack of his response, you walked faster only to find him sitting on the couch with his head down.

„Hey there, handsome.“ You gave him a kiss on the temple and watched him finally look up. Something wasn't right, that was clear in his eyes momentarily.

„We need to talk.“ He spoke, his voice low and hoarse and it made you nervous. But you definitely needed to talk, because you had a lot to say today. It terrified you to no end, but you had faith in the relationship you shared.

„Yeah, we do.“ You took a seat next to him and waited for him to speak. „You can go first.“ You told him and he nodded. Taking a deep breath he looked up from the floor, opening his mouth a few times trying to form the words to say what he needed to. He had something big on his mind, so you thought you could soothe him with a little backrub. However, Grayson stood up and sat on the floor on his knees before you, making you more confused than before.

„I wanna break up.“ Those four words felt like a knife to the heart and you didn't know what to do. In that moment, the world stopped turning for you, the sun died and the birds were no longer singing. He wants to break up. He finally got sick of you. It was just a matter of time, you knew it, but now? Now, when you needed him the most?

„What?“ Your voice was quiet, broken and the tears were quick to follow.

„I want to break up. This isn't working for me anymore.“ Grayson continued, shattering your heart into pieces.

„Whhhat do yyou mean? This isn't working for you? You don't love me anymore, is that it?“ You were so quiet he had to lean in to hear you, but his presence made you sick to your stomach. Jumping up, you ran to the bathroom, falling to your knees as the vomit hit the back of your throat with full force. You threw up last nights pizza, the oatmeal from this morning, everything came out in churns with a pungent smell that only made you throw up more. Grayson was close behind you, holding your hair and forehead to keep you steady.

Flushing the toilet, you got up and washed your mouth to get the acid out. You looked up at the mirror, seeing Grayson behind you with a worried look on his face. He wasn't saying anything and you were barely standing as it is. Your knees were bound to buckle at any moment now and the thoughts that invaded your mind made you want to scream.

„You fell for someone else, didn't you? Someone prettier, smarter? Better than me? Just like I always knew you would.“ You choked out, wiping away the tears that fell one after the other as your chest started to physically hurt. It always sounded silly when people told you their body hurt when they cried, but it was true. Everything was in pain, like you were dying and the only cure you needed was standing before you, unattainable.

„What are you talking about?“ Grayson's face changed from sulky and worried to confused and panicked once you started to sob.

„You always said I was the prettiest girl you've ever met. So smart and funny...and perfect even when I told you I never saw what you did. You said you'd convince me, show me just how beautiful I was. I believed you. God...You have no idea how much this hurts!“ You cried out, pulling at your hair to stop the chaos that had erupted on the inside, to stop the hate you felt for yourself.

„Oh, God. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry baby. I didn't mean to take it this far. I'm so sorry.“ Grayson pulled you into his chest, his words confusing you.

„It's just a stupid prank, I promise I love you so damn much. Please, stop crying. Please!“ He repeated over and over making you angrier each time.

„What the hell are you talking about?! A PRANK?!“ You shouted and he gave you a lopsided smile with a small nod.

„Look at the cameras.“ He pointed around the bathroom and led you into the living room to point out more. You turned to glare at him, tears still running down your cheeks, but this were your angry tears. The worst kind for Grayson. He ran a hand through his hair nervously, gulping loudly as he waited for your imminent rage and destruction because as sweet as you were, when you got angry fire erupted out of you like a dragon lived inside you and you got really scary at times. Those arguments were never good for him and he’d always lose.

You closed your eyes, taking in a few deep breaths, remembering how you must control yourself and why.

„I cannot believe this is who I'm having a baby with.“ You ran a hand over your face in frustration, placing the other hand on your hip.

„Huh?“ Grayson snapped his head up, approaching you in two big steps. He had his hands on your face, lifting your chin up to look into your eyes. Your tears and nose were running like crazy, but you could care less. He really hurt you with his stupid prank, but the relief had won over and you were just more exhausted and in need of his touch. Sometimes it felt like you were with a man-child, but he made you so damn happy.

„I'm pregnant. Those were my news. Idiot.“ You muttered the last part under your breath and looked up, a little bit afraid of his reaction. What if he wasn't ready for this?

„Look at me.“ He ordered and you did. You were taken aback by tears in his eyes and that big goofy smile he had.

„You're crying.“ You said as your own eyes welled up.

„I'm going to be a dad?“ He questioned once more as you nodded in confirmation. His lips brush yours. Not innocently, like a tease but hot, fiery, passionate and demanding way. To pull away before you lose yourself seemed impossible…In this minty moment, all of your senses have been seduced and you could no longer think straight. The only thing you could focus on was him and his lips, the way he ran his hand through your hair, how the other one tightened its grasp on your hip. He pulled back and you groaned at the loss of contact. He chuckled victoriously and you glared at him in return.

„I'm gonna be a dad! Oh my God, I'm such an idiot! I feel even worse about the prank now! I promise I'll make it up to you. I will do anything! Anything!“ He rambled on making you snicker.

„What?“ He stopped and smiled as your laughter reached his ears.

„I love when you ramble.“ You explained and his smile grew wider.

„I'll take you to the shop and you pick out anything you want!“ He pulled you by the hand toward the door, eager to start making amends.

„Grayson, I'm too tired.“ You whined and he stopped.

„That's solvable!“ He picked you up bridal style as you giggled in his arms. With a quick peck he walked out the door, rambling some more.

„We can buy some baby clothes, a crib! What should we name the baby? Dolla and EDWIN?! EDWIN!“ He shouted in excitement as you shushed him.

„It's barely a blob now! We're not naming it yet.“ You spoke and he pursed his lips before kicking the door to Ethan's apartment.

„What?!“ Ethan rubbed his eyes like he had just woken up.

„I'm gonna be a dad!“ Grayson told him and Ethan's eyes widened in surprise. He pulled you both in a hug, crushing you a little as you were stuck in Grayson's arms.

„Crushing the pregnant lady over here!“ You mumbled and they separated instantly.

„What are you going to name the baby?! Jimson!“ Ethan said and you opened your mouth in horror.

„You two are banned from naming the baby!“ You stated and they looked offended. Ethan sent a suggestive wink Grayson's way and you narrowed your eyes at them once you noticed Grayson return the gesture.

„I mean it!“ You held your index finger up and they shrugged with a smile that meant this wasn't over yet.

„I wanna come with you!“ Ethan said.

„You don't know where were going!“ You pointed out and he chuckled.

„Tsk, tsk, tsk. It's obvious! The shop so you could eat stuff!“ Ethan said in a 'duh' tone and you rolled your eyes playfully.

„I can't wait for you to get big and wobble like a penguin!“ Ethan exclaimed and Grayson kicked him and he yelled out in pain.

„Thank you babe!“ You said and Grayson kissed your nose as you snuggled into his arms, feeling a wave of relaxation and peace you craved all day long wash over you.

„I got you, beautiful. Both of you.“

So sorry for the long wait, but here it is: @dolanlifeforever

Hope you like it :)

#grayson dolan #grayson dolan fanfic #grayson dolan fluff #grayson dolan x reader #grayson dolan imagine #grayson dolan angst #dad!grayson #dolan twins #dolan twins fanfic #grayson and ethan

[metalzombiemiss]

Secret--Chapter 25

Characters: Negan x OFC (Lily) Warnings: Language, mentions of rape/abuse

No beta so sorry for any mistakes

Chapter 25

“Are you okay?” Negan questioned Lily as he rubbed her back.

She wiped her mouth and nodded.  “Yeah.  Yeah.  I’m fine.  I must have eaten something that didn’t sit right.  I’ll be okay.”

“Maybe we should wait to go,” Dwight suggested.

They sat on the side of the road as they waited for Lily to stop vomiting.  She had been having random bouts of illness for the past couple of weeks but this was the first time she had gotten sick in front of him.  She didn’t want to assume anything so she kept the issue to herself until she could get ahold of a pregnancy test.  

“No, no!” Lily exclaimed as she sat back up, “I’m fine!  Just a little upset stomach.  I’ll be fine!”

“Baby, it’s okay.  We can go tomorrow,” Negan whispered to her, “If you’re not feeling well, we don’t have to go right now.”

“We have to go now,” she demanded, “I’m not going to let her stay in that place any longer than she has to.”

“Okay,” he rubbed her back once more and put the car in drive, “But if that happens again, we’re turning around.  I’m not going to let you do anything stupid if you’re sick.”

“Fine,” she griped.  

“Are you sure you’re okay, Lily?” Dwight asked.

“I’m good.  Don’t worry about me.  Let’s go get Amber.”

They stopped the car a mile down the road to avoid being seen.  The three of them began their walk to the Sanctuary.  

“We’ll enter through the south side of the building.  Is that gate still easy to unlock, D?” Negan whispered.

“Yeah,” Dwight replied, “We should be able to get right inside.”

“Great,” he said, “Babe, you keep look out and make sure nobody sees us.  Kill anyone who approaches you, got it?”

“Got it,” she nodded.

As they got closer to industrial building, Lily began to feel sick again.  She swallowed the nausea and grabbed the machete from her belt.  Negan signaled to Dwight to get the gate unlocked as he and Lily kept watch.  The only sound they could hear was that of the walkers around the north side of the building.  

“Be careful,” Lily whispered to them.  

They both nodded and rushed inside.  She kept every sense ready and waited patiently for them to get back.  Her heart raced and her stomach began to turn.  She could feel the vomit rising in her throat.  She choked it back and tried to stay focused on her task.

“Hurry the fuck up,” she said to herself.

She suddenly heard quick footsteps getting closer behind her.  She spun around to find Negan, Dwight, Amber, and another young woman running towards her.

“Let’s go!” Negan huffed.

Dwight stopped to lock the gate back up and caught up to them as they continued to run.  They sprinted as quickly as they could until they knew they would be in the clear.  Their pace slowed as the Sanctuary grew smaller from their view.  

“Okay,” Dwight tried to catch his breath, “I think we’re good.  Let’s keep moving.”

“Why did you help us?” Amber asked.

Lily held her stomach.  She turned and said, “Because Simon is hurting you, right?”

Amber nodded, tears welling up in her eyes.

“I’m not going to let him do that to you anymore.  It’s okay.”

“Thank you….” the other woman whimpered.  Her brown hair was matted to her head as if she hadn’t showered in days.

“What’s your name?” Lily asked her.

“Lara…”

Lily could hear the cries getting trapped in her throat.  She sighed and stopped.  She took Lara into her arms and hugged her, “You’re going to be okay now.  Don’t worry.  We’re taking you somewhere safe.”

Lara nodded and began sobbing.  Lily held her tightly as she shook.

“I hate to break up this moment, baby, but we gotta keep going,” Negan insisted.

They reached the car within a few moments and all climbed in.  Negan behind the wheel, Lily beside him, Dwight, Amber, and Lara all climbed into the back.  Lily glanced back at Amber who was just staring out the window.  Lily looked forward and then back again.

“Amber,” she began, “Are you alright?”

Without hesitation, she simply began crying but then nodded. “Thank you, Lily…”

“What was he doing to you?” Negan’s question was met with silence.

“After you left, we thought things were going to become more peaceful.  Less scaring communities and more working together,” Amber explained, wiping tears from her cheeks, “And it was at first when Dwight took over.  But once he left, Simon took control and it all went back but it got worse.  He took some of us as wives but it wasn’t at all like how you did it.  He...he would force us to be with him.  He never gave us a choice.  He picked us and that was the end.  There wasn’t an option for no.  And he never gave us a choice on how we would spend our nights.”

“He was fucking raping you?” The anger in his voice grew.

“Yeah…” Lara squeaked, “And if we made him angry, he wouldn’t let us do anything to take care of ourselves.  I don’t remember the last time I showered.”

“Simon is a monster, Negan.  That’s why we need you back at the Sanctuary.”

“I’m not coming back to the Sanctuary but I am absolutely not letting you stay there.  We’ll handle Simon.  In the meantime, I just want to make sure you’re safe.”

Negan took Lily’s hand in his and squeezed gently.  He looked at her and she gave him a smile.  She could feel the glare coming from Amber.  She turned to face her.  

“You’ll be safe in Alexandria,” she explained, “We have plenty of food, shelter, and showers.  You don’t have to worry about Simon anymore.”

“Mmhmm…” Amber rolled her eyes and set her gaze out the window.

“Hey,” Negan’s voice boomed in the small car, “Lily is the whole fucking reason we came to see you in the fucking first place.  She knew something wasn’t right because she’s been through that kind of bullshit before.  You better be fucking thanking her.” His eyes met hers from the rearview mirror.  

Amber sheepishly replied, “Thank you, Lily.  I...I didn’t know…”

“Don’t worry about it.  We’ll be fine,” she responded quietly.

“This is where you live?” Lara looked at the houses in awe as she climbed out of the car.

“It is,” Lily greeted her, “Come on.  Let’s get you into a shower.  You can crash in our guest room for the night.”

“Amber, you should probably crash with D,” Negan said, coldly.

“I’m not going to do anything, Negan!” Her voice cracked as she responded.

He stopped in his tracks and spun on his heel, “I don’t fucking care.  You’ve disrespected me and Lily too many times.  You’re not staying with us.”

“Negan!” Lily shouted, “It’s fine.  We have two extra bedrooms and a couch, Amber.  You can have your pick.”

“Thank you,” Amber lowered her gaze to the ground as they continued their walk to the house.

After a few hours of cleaning up and finally settling down, Dwight, Lara, and Amber slept heavy inside the house.  Dwight crashed on the couch while Amber and Lara took one of the upstairs guest rooms.  In the master bedroom, Negan and Lily tried to relax but couldn’t manage to lie still.  He pulled her tightly to his chest and sighed.

“We did the right thing,” she assured him.

“I know we did.  I’m not worried about that.  We had to help.  But I know Simon.  I know what he’s capable of and...babe, he’s going to come here looking for them.  I know he is.” The worry in his voice grew and he squeezed her tighter.

“We’ll handle it when the time comes.  In the meantime, we just need to keep them safe,” she said, calmly.  

The following morning, Lily got up before everyone else to make breakfast.  The coffee brewing made her mouth water as it filled the house with its incredible aroma.  Dwight had woken up shortly after hearing her rustle about and began to help with setting plates for everyone.  They chatted quietly as they waited for everyone to wake up.

“You think Simon is going to come looking for them?” she asked him.

He gave a quick shrug, “I don’t know, actually.  It depends on how invested he is on both of them.  If he does, then we’ll deal with him the best way we can.”

“We’ll kill him,” Negan’s groggy voice startled them both.

“Good morning, honey,” Lily smiled.

He gave a nod as he scratched the back of his head.  He planted a kiss on Lily’s cheek and immediately grabbed a cup of coffee.  

Dwight set the last utensils on the table and turned around to face Negan, “Is killing people always your immediate thought?”

“Uh….if they fuck with me or people I’m protecting or the place I live, then yes.  That is my immediate thought.  So if Simon comes, we’ll take him down.  Plain and simple,” Negan responded without hesitation.

Lara and Amber walked into the kitchen, looking exhausted but finally clean.  

“Were the showers good?” Lily asked them.

They both nodded and smiled.  “Thank you, again,” Lara’s voice was soft and gentle.  

Lily finished cooking breakfast and they gathered around the table.  Their conversation steered away from the subject of Simon and the Sanctuary.  Lara and Amber quietly ate and enjoyed every bite of their meal, complimenting Lily on her cooking.  It was as if they hadn’t eaten a good meal in months.  

“We’ll take you to Rick in a little while and introduce you.  We can probably find you a place to stay.  He might have some jobs for you, too,” Negan explained to them.

“Wait,” Lara put her fork down, “Are you saying we could have our own house?”

Lily giggled softly, “Yeah.  I think we just expanded a week or so ago so we should have some new homes available!”

“How do the jobs work here?  We get points for the work and then we can use them to buy things or…?” Amber asked.

Dwight quickly chimed in, “No.  No, you work and you get what you need.  We just ask that you pull your weight here.”

The two of them looked at each other and back at everyone else.  Lara covered her face as she began to cry.  Amber hugged her and met eyes with Lily, “I don’t even know what to say.  Thank you…”

“No worries.  Finish up.  We’ll get you over to Rick’s soon,” she responded.  She stopped eating for a moment. Her stomach began to turn. “Excuse me,” she whispered. She bolted upstairs and just barely made it to the bathroom. She sat on the floor, frustrated with her nausea as she flushed the contents of her stomach down the toilet.

“Baby?” Negan sounded worried as he knocked on the door. He opened it slowly, “You good?”

She nodded wiping the spit from her mouth. “Yeah. I think I’m still sick. I’m gonna go lie down. You okay to take them to Rick?”

“Of course,” he sat down next to her.

She leaned her small head on his broad shoulder and sighed. “Thanks, babe.”

He gave her a light kiss on her forehead and rubbed her back. She felt safe and warm with each touch but her uncertainty about what was going on with her grew.

#negans thirst squad #twd negan #negan fanfiction

[crystallinecrimsonmoth]

Future Serial Killer [ongoing]

Chapter 23

Negan leaned against the wall as Rick slept on the doctor’s bed in front of him. His face was cut multiple times from Carl’s fists, his nose smashed even more with a crack through his cheekbone according to the ultrasound machine Doc had used to check him over. He was beaten and battered at the hands of his son, still breathing but he looked like a broken man laying there, dried blood covering a minority of his face.

Doc had cleaned him up for the most part and stitched the cuts, taping a few squares of gauze over the wounds, but even after an hour-long surgery to realign the fractured bones in his nose, Rick was still a wreck.

The Saviour wasn’t sure how to feel about it. On the one hand, he despised the man for calling his precious little lamb a whore, but he also knew that Carl wasn’t innocent in all of this. He’d killed one of his men, albeit with perfectly good reason, and beat his father half to death with the intention to kill him.

Rick had been unconscious for nineteen hours now since the incident. Doc had taken care of all his injuries and made him comfortable with the little pain medication that Negan would allow. It was enough so his body wouldn’t go into shock and die, but he’d still feel the beating Carl gave him. Negan wanted him to feel how upset his son was, to learn what he said to him was wrong. He wanted him to look in the mirror and see those scars every day, to remind him of the hurt he caused the teen.

Carl had come around from his killing high two hours after waking the next day, and Negan sat witness on the bed beside him as his face crumpled and he realised that he’d almost been raped, that his dad had called him a whore, and that he almost killed the man who gave him life.

All the kid’s conflicting emotions came out in a flood of tears, his face flushed red as he cried into the sleeves of Negan’s green hoodie, waves of brown hair falling in front of his face. He was shaking, shoulders trembling with the effort of letting all his feelings out, and it broke the older man’s heart.

‘It’s okay, little lamb. Let it out.’ He sighed, letting the teen bury himself in the Saviour’s chest and holding him tightly.

Carl had cried for what felt like a lifetime, fingers digging into Negan’s bare chest as he soaked his skin in the salty sadness. The soul-destroying noise only stopped when the teen cried so much that he passed out, body falling limp in Negan’s arms and slow puffs of breath spreading on his neck as the boy fell asleep.

Waiting until the kid’s entire body relaxed on him, Negan tucked Carl in under their shared bedsheets, brushing his hair away from his face and wiping away the stray teardrops on his cheek.

‘I love you, darling.’ He whispered despite the teen being unconscious, kissing his forehead before grabbing a pen and paper.

Once his note was written down, he left the room as quietly as he could, clicking the door shut and then heading out into the courtyard, needing to talk to what remained of his guards about the dwindling numbers situation.

When Carl woke up from his nap of exhaustion a little while after Negan left the room, it was still light outside. He yawned, wondering what time it was, and slowly rose from the bed, rubbing his eye. Negan wasn’t there anymore, the space on the bed beside him empty of any warm body he could cuddle into for comfort.

It left him feeling cold, the chill of the room reaching his skin and the bones underneath, as he remembered what happened the day before. The creeping, sticky wet texture of blood on his hands and face followed him, prickling his senses, and causing a shiver to run through his body. He tried to suppress it, curling his arms around his waist, and got out of bed to find clean bottoms.

He was still sleeping in his underwear at the Sanctuary, a habit Negan had given him that he had never really gotten out of. It was a way to remember he was safe there, on the fifth floor of a steel building, with stairs between him and the walkers on the ground. He didn’t need to sleep in full battle gear, he didn’t need a gun under his pillow, he didn’t need his knife on the dresser. The safety made him feel warmer too, giving him a soft, melting feeling in his chest that reminded of home. That’s what the Sanctuary was now, and the bedroom he was sitting in. He was home.

Distracting himself from sappy emotions about how comfortable he was in Negan’s bed, Carl shuffled to the dresser full of his and his boyfriend’s clothes, pulling out a fresh pair of skinny jeans. He hadn’t liked the tight trousers at first, feeling like they were too revealing when Negan got them for him, but his older lover had quickly erased those fears.

‘Kid, I grabbed you some new shit today in the shopping mall! Come see if they fit, I’ll chuck them in the community collection if they don’t.’ Negan called through into the bathroom as Carl brushed his teeth, making the teen jump out of his skin.

He hadn’t even realised Negan was home yet, humming to himself too loud to hear the door clicking open. He spat his mouthful of toothpaste into the sink and wiped his mouth before padding through on bare feet to the bedroom.

The older man was sitting there with three pairs of denim jeans, all different shades of blue, and all a lot thinner looking than the trousers Carl was used to.

That made him shake his head immediately at the sight of the new clothes.

‘No way. They won’t fit.’

‘They’re the same size as the ones you wear already, kiddo, of course, they’ll fit.’

Carl just shook his head again, going back into the bathroom to pee and leaving the door open for Negan to talk.

‘Baby, at least try them on. You might like them.’

‘They’ll be too tight.’ The teen argued, tugging his underwear down and pissing into the toilet.

A deep chuckle reached his ears from the bedroom, the sound still managing to send shivers down his spine as he peed.

‘They’re meant to be tight, darling. They’re called skinny jeans for a reason.’

‘I don’t like tight clothes.’ Carl huffed, finishing with the toilet, and tucking himself back into his boxers, wandering through to find Negan holding up the jeans to show him the length.

‘Come on, Carl, you’ll like them. You liked the shorts, didn’t you?’ He grinned, ivory teeth glimmering under the light from the window.

The teen crossed his arms, glaring at the denim trousers and his boyfriend for a moment before snatching them out of his hands, sitting down on the bed and tugging them over his legs. Once he’d pulled them up and buttoned the waist, he looked down, grimacing at how visible the fat on his thighs was under the tight fabric.

He’d never wanted to show off his legs, always feeling like no matter how little rations he ate, the blubber on his thighs never went away. It had started stressing him out when he was fifteen, and only got worse from there, so he always wore baggy trousers. The only exception was the shorts because at least he could hide his thighs under Negan’s hoodies.

‘They look brilliant on you, darling.’ His boyfriend’s arms found his waist and Carl hesitated a little, taking a minute to calm down about the image of his thighs before accepting that Negan loved them.

Negan loved every inch of Carl; he’d made that much clear. He had to keep remembering that.

‘Thanks, Neeg…’ He finally murmured into the quiet of the room, hugging Negan’s arms that circled him.

Once he was dressed up and decent to go outside, Carl headed out of the bedroom, locking it behind him just in case.

‘Afternoon.’ The guard posted outside of their room tipped his hat to him, making him frown somewhat.

Since when did the guards say hi to him…

Brushing it off, he smiled at the man he knew as Adrian, giving him a shy wave before wandering downstairs. The hub was lively that day, lots of Saviours bustling around and laughing with each other. It was comforting, Carl thought, much more social than Alexandria had been. He liked that.

‘Scarface, heads up!’ He whipped around to see an apple flying at his head, managing to catch it just in time and smiling at Daniel and Ada when they approached him from the other side of the hall, another apple in Daniel’s hand.

‘Are we throwing apples at each other to communicate now?’ He smiled gently at the other boy who just grinned at him, biting into the fruit he was holding and wiping his mouth on the back of his sleeve.

‘We thought we’d catch up with you. You’ve been stuck up in that room with Negan for almost twenty-four hours.’ Ada teased as they started wandering outside of the main building.

The sun was shining outside, warm and comforting on his pale skin, the only clouds at least a mile away. After a few days of rain, Carl was glad to finally get some sunlight. The three friends walked along the courtyard, each with an apple in their hand as they went. Ada didn’t talk about Carl’s dad, which he was grateful for, and Daniel filled him in on the new soup recipes Rose was teaching him, along with updating him on a new love interest on the security team.

‘Do you fanboy over all of those guys? Some of them aren’t even that hot.’

‘Rory is! And Zero.’ Daniel signed, gushing over the older man with brown hair that Carl had only ever met once.

Carl rolled his eyes, smiling at his shorter friend’s hopeless romantic attitude, before staring ahead of them to the outer fence, trying to find Negan with the security team members that were gathered in a group. It took him a moment but then he spotted him.

His whole body went ice cold despite the heat around him. Negan was kissing a woman he didn’t know.

‘No.’ He whispered into the space around him, barely feeling the grip on his arm when Daniel tried to stop him from storming over.

It was like the moment he beat his dad up all over again. His vision went red with anger, lip twitching with the effort to keep his rage inside. He wasn’t sure what he would do when he got to the kissing pair, but he was sure that he wanted that bitch dead.

#cegan #future serial killer #chapter 23 #carl/negan #carl x negan #negan x carl

[justanontherwinchester]

Hunters Don’t Cry: Part 3

Pairings: Dean x Reader x BestFriend Sam

Summary: Catch up  HERE This is a little more of a flash back chapter. It gives a bit of a back story and shows the bond between Sam and the reader. We get a glimpse into the present but not a lot.

Word Count: 1700ish

Warnings: More Angst, Emotional Roller Coaster, talks of abortion, adult language and cheating

Author’s Note: You guys are great! I don't know how many parts this will be but thank you so much for the love and support. I am going to start tagging people, if you request. So if you would like to be tagged, please just let me know. I do plan on writing other things so please choose between being tagged in Sam, Dean, or all. I will probably start adding other characters into the mix once I get into the habit of really writing again. I am a Dean girl though so if my stories contain mostly him, sorry. Again, thank you so much for the support and I hope you like the next part. If you guys ever want to talk about this story, my ask is always open. :)

"Are you ready?" Sam asked as we walked up to the door of the local clinic.

"No. I'm not." I was a mess and Dean was suppose to be here, not Sam. I'm grateful he is but this was not his place. This wasn't his child.

"He will be here soon." He stated as he opened the door and walked me in.

The room was cold and plain. White walls, brown chairs, filled with girls in the same boat as me. I checked in, filling out the paper work under a false name, with a false credit card, and a false social security number. The girls around me ranged in all ages. The sadness in the room was overwhelming. Sam sat beside me and grabbed my hand trying to comfort me as I called Dean, again, for the millionth time.

"Least you have a man who is supportive." The girl across from me, cried into a tissue. I thought I was a wreck.

"Oh he's not.. we're not together. He's just my best friend." I stuttered, letting go of Sam. He smirked at me but tried to act serious.

"Of course even the good guys out there are gay." She was still crying into the soggy tissue. "I mean you're beautiful. Look at your hair"

"I'm not gay, I'm straight. But all people are great. Like butt stuff is cool. I mean.. yeah.  I'm just her best friend." Sam tried to compose his self but he was failing. His words were falling out.

"Not with that hair you aren't."

He looked at me and did his Sam face. He was defeated and had no come backs.

"So lushhh." I ran my hands through his hair, just how he hated it.

"Walker?!" An angry, old lady screamed from the opposite side of the room.

"That's you." Sam nudged my side. I forgot which fake name I had used. All I remember is Dean wasn't here. He wasn't here and I needed him. I got up and motioned for Sam to stay. I was a big girl, I can do this. She pointed to a room in the long corridor, room 3.

"There's a gown and a urine cup in there. You must remove all personal belongings, clothes and jewelry before entering the restroom. You may not flush the toilet. If you flush you will have to cancel and come back another day. You will not receive your money back if you flush. Have you recently come into contact with any STDs by either oral, anal, vaginal intercourse, shared needles and blood? This is not limited to HIV and AIDS. "Ugh... no?" I have only been with one man in my life and if he had something, we were going to have a problem.

"How many partners, of all genders, have you had sexual intercourse with in the past six months?" She had this memorized as she went through her checklist. She didn't even look at me.

"One. Just one."

"Okay, go ahead remove your clothes, your phone will have to stay outside in the basket."

"Can I make one last phone call, privately?"

"Two minutes or you give up your slot."

I nodded at her and dialed his number as she walked out of the room.

"This is Dean, if you have this number you know what to do." Great, the fucking answering machine.

"Hey. I'm here. Where are you? I know I've called a lot but I'm really scared Dean and I need you. I need you to be here. I'm doing what you wanted but I need you here. Please call me back." I closed my phone and started crying. "Hunters don't cry. You've killed monsters. You can get through this."

The nurse walked back in with a tissue and handed to to me.

"Honey, if he's the one who made the choice but he's not here, you need to find a different man." She stated, changing my entire thoughts about her.  "You also don't have to do this. How far along are you?"

"8 weeks yesterday." I rested my hand on my stomach, there was an actual child there. It was real and I was getting rid of it."

"Do you want to have a child?"

"I mean I've always wanted my family but I travel a lot. I'm never home, I don't have any family but my cousin. Besides the father and my best friend, I'm alone. I can't raise a child alone."

"Have you thought about adoption."

"Aren't you suppose to be telling me this isn't going to hurt, not try to talk me out of it."

"We already have your deposit, that's non-refundable."

"No, I haven't thought about it because I can't work pregnant." If I wasn't questioning things already, she was making it worse. But how am I suppose to save people 8 months pregnant? I would be Shamu.

"You have other options. Just think about it." She handed me some pamphlets and closed the door behind her. Here I was alone, with my ass hanging out of a hospital gown about to have a vacuum up my vagina. I was about to get rid of something I've yet to have a part in. Dean Winchester will not tell me what to do with my body or my child. If he wanted a say so, he should have been here. He was suppose to love me and support me.  

I grabbed my belongings and ran out of the exam room and down the hallway. I wasn't doing this. With much more force than I intended, I opened the door to the waiting room.

"I'm not doing this Sammy. Dean can go fuck himself but I am having this baby and I'm going to be a good mom." I stood in the middle of the waiting room, with my ass still hanging out, surrounded by many other girls in the same boat. He put down the Women's Health magazine and stood up. He walked towards me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"Let's go home?" He asked.

"No, we are going to find Dean." I knew where he was if he wasn't at the motel, he was at the bar or the local diner.

"Okay, but put on some pants first." Sam laughed as we walked out of the clinic and to the car we "borrowed". I didn't know what I was going to tell Dean but I didn't care. We were having a child.

"Twins?" Dean looked at me with his eyes as wide as an ocean.

"Twins." I replied back.

"We have twins." He was still shocked. I was honestly expecting worse.

"Two little girls. Brinley and Brielle Winchester."

"How the hell did you hide this? Why did you hide this? We have two daughters and now you think this is best time to spring this on me?"

"Are you fucking serious right now, Dean?! I hid it from you because you were the one who told me to get an abortion. You were the one who gave me the credit card and said "handle it." You were the one who was suppose to be there holding my hand while I made the biggest choice of my life. Where were you Dean? You were too busy getting drunk to care." Now he had made me  mad, again.

"You told me you were having a baby and it was the damn apocalypse. What do you think I was suppose to do? Hold your hand and tell you everything is going to be okay?"

"No, but I expected you to at least be there. The one time I asked you to do something for me, you bailed and you were drunk fucking with her."

"That was the night we met, wasn't it?" Tiffany, who was now standing beside me looked at Dean, heartbroken.

"I was on a bender. It doesn't matter."

"Yes it does!" We both said at the same time, surprising us both and the boys.

"You told me your ex left you and was aborting your child because she didn't want it. Not that you didn't want it."

"She never told me she wanted to keep it."

"Them. Keep them." I chimed in.

"Okay, yes I told her to get rid of them. I told her I didn't want them. I was wrong and by the time I knew I wanted them, she was gone." He looked at me, sad and empty. "You were gone."

"If he's not in here Sam, I'm going to kill him."  I opened the door to the dark, smoke filled bar.

"He will be here, the car is parked out front." Sam was following behind, coughing at the smoke. "You shouldn't be in here, it could be bad for the baby."

"Let's find Dean and go." I walked around the pool tables looking for him, nothing.

I wanted to give up. He wasn't here either. My bladder had other ideas. I opened the door to the restroom, every stall was empty but one. I heard some giggling and clothes ruffling. I couldn't judge though. Dean and I had done the exact same thing many times. I called his phone one more time, keeping the volume low so the couple could not hear me. Then I heard it, two stalls down. It was him. I heard him fumbling to turn it off, then I got his voicemail.

"Who was that, baby?" I heard the female voice ask him.

"Nothing, wrong number. Now where were we?" He said and she started laughing again.

Tears were steaming down my face as I rand out of the restroom and right into Sam.

"Let's go!" I screamed

"Are you sure you don't want to wait for Dean?"

"He's not here." I snapped back at him.

"But Baby is..." he tried to respond but I cut him off.

"He's not here Sam, let's go. I need to go to the motel and get my things."

"Where are you planning on going?"

"I'm going home, Sam. I'm going back to Kansas. "

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#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural one shot #dean x reader #dean winchester #dean x y/n #dean winchester fanfiction #Sam Winchester #sam winchester fanfiction