#(silk is real silk that was important to me) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

xfgpng · 7 months

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“𝐝𝐨𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞”

— : [nsfw] slight angst, smut, fluff, pet names, fingering + getting together

(tw.// kidnapping and auctioning of real people as a plot device.)

— : [ wc ] : 6.1k

a/n :: this is not stockholm syndrome at all. their relationship is and will be 100% consensual. i think it’s pretty obvious that it isn’t but it’s better to just address that.

she has always made sure to do right by her father. y/n knew his career was important and while her mother was out the country on vacation with her girls, he insisted y/n join him for a fancy dinner party.

she had to dress up and look good so she didn’t embarrass him or their family name. it was a simple matter and she enjoyed the new clothing.

this time it was a beautiful silk red dress that stopped at her ankles with a slit up the right side.

“you don’t look all that excited for this party” yuzuha sighs but she helps her fix your outfit and makeup.

“he parades me around like some .. trophy” she scoffs, “father feels the need to brag to everyone about me but he forgets that he was barely around, too busy with work”

“i wish you’d move in with me” yuzuha says gently, “hakkai has moved in with mitsuya now so i have the extra space”

“yuzu—”

“y/n you’re 21 now” she says, “you don’t have to do everything they tell you to do. you need to live for yourself”

y/n knew she was right but there was no arguing against whatever her parents wanted. they could’ve abandoned her but at least she had her nannies and everything she could’ve dreamed of.

she felt that she owed them this much.

“think about it okay?” yuzuha smiles, “and please, chifuyu really worries about you so don’t ignore his texts”

y/n grin up at her as she reaches for the lipgloss to finish up her makeup.

“maybe i like playing hard to get” y/n tease and yuzuha laughs, flicking her forehead.

going to these parties were never really her thing but this one was different, he made sure to remind her just how important this night was for him and their families entire fortune.

the limo was parked right out front and he slowly helped her get in, which was good because she felt her arm catch onto something. a tiny pin prick could be felt as she made her way inside and then everything went black.

the sounds of people talking outside jostled her into consciousness. she’s still in the limo, she doesn’t even remember falling asleep but the slight pain on her side had her much more aware now.

“dad?” she call out, stumbling out the car. she hated the stupid dress she wore because it felt shorter now and the heels were uncomfortable against the gravel.

“why are we at the back?” y/n ask, confused. “the entrance is—”

“take her inside and make sure she doesn’t make too much of a scene” her father tells one of the bodyguards

she look at him in confusion and the grip on her arm is almost bruising.

“dad? what’s going on?” she tries to pull away but the taller, much larger man pulls her along and she sees the sad look on her fathers face and she knows this isn’t a regular dinner party.

there are other women around her age, looking as beautiful as she does but even more afraid. they’re all dressed up like they were attending a fancy dinner party but they all had the same black collar around their necks with a colour in the middle.

“what the fuck is going on?” y/n ask, eyes widening when the men in the room force them all into pretty glass boxes. as if they were about to be put on display.

“if you don’t want to be sedated, you’d better behave and do as they tell you” a girl whispers. she looks younger than y/n is, meaning she could be 19 and y/n feel an uncomfortable feeling in her stomach.

her own father was about to sell her off. it had to be a nightmare and maybe she was still in the limo, passed out from the lack of sleep from all the school work at college.

the lights dim and then the curtains are drawn. there are women and men all around the room, rich people with money to waste and she felt dirty as she felt eyes on her.

“oh” sanzu chuckles, leaning back as he grabs another flute of champagne, “they have new faces”

“how sickening” ran rolls his eyes. he had no reason to be here but rindou was getting restless and mikey suggested they follow a lead on their recent customer who owed them a lot of money.

“he’s in the front” rindou nods, “he’s not with his wife so perhaps his here to buy”

“not quite” sanzu smirks, “look towards the stage”

 mikey clenches his jaw as he sees what sanzu is talking about. none of them could be considered good people with morals but family was important and so was loyalty.

“what am i missing?” ran asks dryly

“pretty little thing in red” sanzu sighs

rindou grins when he sees her. she’s the prettiest one on stage, the red bringing out her eyes even from the distance. she didn’t look scared like the other women were. she looked angry and hurt?

his smile drops when he realises what’s going on.

“that’s his daughter” rindou says

“she is” sanzu shakes his head, “disgusting pig will do anything for money, even going this far”

“is he planning to use this money to pay us back?” ran asks

“i want her” rindou says

“rin you—”

“i want her” he says more firmly, eyes never leaving her as she stands uncomfortably on stage behind the pretty glass.

he has always had a special kind of love for dolls, porcelain was his most precious treasure but he needed to have her.

“he’ll owe us” sanzu smirks, “he doesn’t know we’re here so i say we make him squirm a little”

“do your worst” mikey says dryly and leaves with ran out the back.

ran isn’t sure he wants to leave his younger brother in a room with beautiful women in glass cases but he’s never really collected humans before. perhaps he was playing around .

“number 4!” the host calls out and she feels her blood run cold. this wasn’t a nightmare. her own father was really auctioning her off to a bunch of rich people who wouldn’t even see her as a person.

she felt sick and resisted the urge to run, she knew she wouldn’t get far with the amount of guards surrounding the place and she could see a weird looking man standing nearby with a briefcase. she had a feeling there was something in there that would be used on her if she didn’t cooperate.

everything feels like a blur as the host introduces her. she can hear him speaking about her achievements, her family and where she comes from. they have no shame admitting who her father is and the old bastard has the nerve to look smug as the people in the room cheer for him.

she felt like throwing up, head a little dizzy and she realises then that he had drugged her on her way into the limo. she forces her poker face and looks straight ahead. she would not cry in front of these people and she’d never give him the satisfaction.

did her mother know what he was doing? did she go away on purpose?

she sees two men approaching her father, one with pink hair and pretty scars and another much more stoic man, his purple hair catching her eye before she looks away again.

“good evening” sanzu grins

“what—”

“don’t try anything stupid or we’ll shoot you” sanzu warns, smiling brightly.

“you sell your own child?” rindou asks, “do you have any shame?”

“it’s not what—”

“here’s what i think happened” rindou cuts him off, “you thought you’d made some money tonight, have someone have their way with her and then when you’re done paying mikey off, you get her back and act like nothing happened?”

“rich people love to throw their kids in therapy anyway, isn’t that right?” sanzu adds

“well tonight, things are going to go very differently” sanzu pats his back, “we are going to put in the highest bid for her”

“no please don’t do this” he begs, “she’s my only child you don’t understand”

“i didn’t ask” sanzu scoffs, “you’re just another sorry motherfucker”

“you better find another way to get the boss his money or it’s not gonna end well for your sweet little girl or your wife” sanzu whispers, “she’s in macau isn’t she?”

he swallows hard and tries his best to smile when he sees another couple walk by and greet him.

“this is what happens to people like you” rindou downs the last of his whiskey and walks towards the host.

they knew who bonten was and no one would try and outbid them.

she looked scared now that she was alone with them. she kept trying to pull her dress up despite it not revealing too much. sanzu found her to be very pretty but rindou couldn’t stop looking at her pretty brown eyes.

“what’s your name pretty girl?” rindou asks, “we’re not going to hurt you”

“y/n” she says, “why did you—”

“buy you?” sanzu asks from the drivers seat

“your father is a very bad man y/n” rindou explains, “he owes us a lot of money and tonight, he was here to sell you off to pay his debts”

her eyes widen and she allows herself to cry, covering her face as she leans against the car door. she didn’t even feel like she was in her body.

“my name is sanzu” sanzu says, “and that’s rindou, he really liked you”

“do you always do this?” she asks

“no” rindou says immediately, “in our line of work, we have different departments and we don’t deal with these things”

“but you do” y/n says, scoffing as she holds her arms around herself.

“the women who choose to work for us come on their own” sanzu says, “it’s easier than having a pimp on the streets”

“am I going to be like that?” she asks softly

“never” rindou takes her hand, “no, that’s not why you’re here”

“you’ll stay with rin for now” sanzu pulls up in front of a huge house, “his maids will assist you with whatever you need while we do our jobs”

“are you going to kill him?” she looks at rindou, “my father”

“he knew what he was getting into” rindou explains, “it’s not up to me what happens”

“it’s been a long day” sanzu yawns, “go inside and sleep it off”

“what about my cell phone?” she asks, “or my bag?”

“it’s here” rindou says, “i’ll be keeping it for now”

“as long as you behave, there’s no reason to be scared” he adds and she doesn’t say anything. she can see they both have guns and she’d rather not try her luck and when she didn’t even know where she was.

his house is huge, filled with paintings and it was almost haunting. he guides her through the house and into a large bedroom.

 she feels scared and can’t help but start crying again. she didn’t want this and she didn’t want him to touch her either.

“this isn’t my room” he says, “you’ll stay here and if you need something, you’ll call for me and no one else”

“you’re not —”

“despite what people think, we’re not disgusting enough to sleep with women against their consent, go to sleep”

 she’s too stunned to say anything as she walks out and locks the door. she knows her friends will be worried about her and she doesn’t even know what she’ll say to them.

she couldn’t tell them the truth, it was far too scary but she swore she saw a familiar face last night. he looked shocked to see her there.

there’s no doubt he would tell yuzuha, their relationship had improved over the years. maybe they could help her?

she cried herself to sleep that night, dreaming of running away from home, far away from the city and far away from the family she thought she knew.

“are you sure you saw her there?” yuzuha is pacing the kitchen, “this can’t be right”

“can’t we go to the police?” hakkai asks

“no” taiju says, “she wasn’t bought by some random rich guy”

“rindou won the auction” he adds and that has yuzuha panicking even more. what business did her best friend have with bonten?

“calm down” taiju says, “last night her old man sold her off, i heard he did some shady business with bonten and ran with their money.. she’s safe for now, just let me find out more before you try anything stupid”

“what will they do to her?” yuzuha asks, she’s trying to not cry but she can’t imagine anything good coming from this.

“nothing” taiju says, “they’ve never done any shit like this before, they’re playing a game and unfortunately her father got her involved”

“are you going to see them today?” hakkai asks, “maybe you could at least find out where she is”

“no promises but i can try” he sighs, “this is a lot bigger than any of us because no one crosses mikey and gets a slap on the wrist”

“he has to make an example” hakkai whispers, “even if it’s at her expense”

“I can’t promise that i’ll find anything out but trust that they won’t hurt her and y/n isn’t weak” taiju says, “let me handle this”

 yuzuha nods, knowing she wouldn’t be able to do anything even if she tried to.

she wakes up a little disoriented, having fallen asleep in the red dress from the night before. she tries to remember where she is when the memories come crashing back like a wave.

she sits up fast, glancing around the otherwise empty room. the bed is huge but she can tell this room has never been used before. she doesn’t know if that makes her feel better.

the door opens and rindou enters. he’s changed from the night before and he hands her a bag with clothing and a towel.

“you can take a shower and change into something more comfortable” he says and when she finally stands, she notices the glass case to the side of the room.

“are those—”

“antiques” he grins, “i’m a .. collector”

she doesn’t know what he means by that but she can appreciate the fine china though she doesn’t know why he’d keep the tea sets locked up in a bedroom.

“you’ll come have breakfast with me once you’re ready” he says and she can tell it’s not a question.

“my phone” she says softly, “please, my friends they’ll worry”

“if you do as you’re told, you’ll get your phone back” rindou explains gently, “i don’t intend to keep you as a prisoner though you’d look beautiful all dolled up”

y/n doesn’t ask what he means by that, following him into the on suite bathroom.

“this is your bathroom” rindou smiles, “you’ll be able to get new clothes and whatever else you may need but try and run from me and i won’t be so nice”

she nods and waits for him to leave before she takes a deep breath, staring at her reflection in the mirror. her face is puffy from crying herself to sleep.

the entire night still doesn’t feel real but she can’t get the look of her fathers face out her head. her was willing to sell her off to anyone that would pay a high price to pay off his own debts. she was starting to realise she never really knew her own father.

the warm water relaxes her enough to let her guard down and she allows herself a moment to think about rindou. she didn’t understand what the man wanted from her. he didn’t want to sleep with her or maybe he did but he wasn’t going to push her.

 he was being nice when he didn’t have to be. she supposes this might just be a lesson for her father or whoever else tried to cross bonten.

if she really thought about it, it might’ve been effective if she didn’t know all about bonten and the rumours she’s heard even at college.

she swallows hard. would she be able to go back to school after all this? she was sure some of the people there last night could’ve easily been parents to kids at her college and the thought has her running out the shower to throw up. her stomach was empty anyway.

“you can text your friends” rindou hands her the phone, “i don’t know what you’ll say but be careful, i don’t want to have to make an example out of your friends”

“that won’t be necessary” she says quickly, “thank you”

there are over 50 missed calls from Yuzuha alone and when she opens her text messages, she realises she doesn’t have to say a thing.

taiju was there and he told her.

she feels a knot in her stomach as she sends a quick message promising that she was fine and that she’d call whenever she could.

“what did he do?” y/n asks when she’s done drinking her juice, “my father…”

rindou sighs.

“you don’t think your father could run his business that successfully all these years without making some deal?” rindou asks, “do you remember when his business started getting successful?”

“he’s always been successful” y/n frowns, “but last year, he gave almost every single employee a bonus”

“which would’ve been bad for business if he couldn’t afford it right?” he asks and she nods slowly

“last year a friend of your fathers introduced him to my boss” rindou shrugs, “your old man had other interests outside finance”

“what do you mean?” y/n asks

“women” rindou grins

“no” she immediately shakes her head, “he wouldn’t”

“no?” rindou laughs, “and yet look where you are right now sweetheart”

she looks down at her empty plate and feels like crying again. she wasn’t sure how much more she could take before she really had a breakdown.

“don’t look so sad baby” rindou pats her head as he walks behind her, “you’re far better off with me than that old man of yours”

she doesn’t know what to believe right now but she feels too tired to argue. she just sighs and stands to take her plate but he stops her.

“how about we go for a drive hm?” he says softly, “i have some things to do for my boss but i’m all yours”

she doesn’t want to think about the shiver that runs up her spine at his words or the way he smells so good from being this close.

“okay” she finds herself agreeing. it’s not like she has anything else to do because she was off from college for a while anyway and she wasn’t even sure she wanted to go back to her old life.

a life that seemed so distant now.

“where’s my daughter” he asks, slamming his hands on the table as ran lazes in his chair.

kakucho smirks as he watches the old bastard throw a fit.

“you weren’t this concerned about her last night” ran scoffs

“i had everything under control!” he says, “i knew the buyer-”

“you’re a sick fucking man” kakucho cuts him off, “selling your kid for a night for what? so you could pay off your debts?”

“i do what i have to for my family” he says angrily

“no, you do what you have to for yourself” ran rolls his eyes, “you’ll never see her again so you better just focus on getting mikey his money or your wife won’t be getting on that plane home tomorrow night”

“she’s just starting her life” he begs, “please,i’ll do anything”

“you should’ve thought about that before you paraded her around like some pretty little prize” kakucho moves from where he had been standing.

“we’re done here” ran says dryly, “see yourself out”

“i’ll go to the cops” he threatens but they just laugh at him. they were used to empty threats.

the drive seemed to make her feel less uneasy around rindou. he wasn’t very talkative but she liked the quite anyway. she didn’t feel like talking either and when they arrived home.

he still had business to do so she found herself walking around the house. it was beautiful but she wondered how he stayed by himself aside from his maids. it felt too big and cold for just one person.

at the end of the hallway, she stumbled upon a large oakwood door. it was bigger than all the other doors. she hated how curious she was as she slowly pushed the door open.

the room was covered from top to bottom in glass. it felt as though she was intruding but she slowly entered, eyes widening in shock when she saw all the dolls.

porcelain dolls of all shapes and sizes in beautiful glass cases. she gasped when she felt someone stand behind her, her back pressed firmly against his chest.

“i see you’ve found this room” he chuckles, “beautiful isn’t it?”

she wasn’t sure she’d call it beautiful. it was a lot more scary than she’d like to admit but she was also fascinated by it all.

“why—”

“i’ve told you before, i liked to collect pretty things” he gently places a hand on her waist

“like me?” she finds herself asking despite herself.

“i’ve never collected humans if that’s what you’re asking” he laughs, “though you are very pretty and i guess last night, i found myself wanting to keep you too”

“what about now?” she turns to face him

“i don’t want to see you the same way i see these antiques” he cups the side of her face, “if your father complies, you’ll be free to go”

“and if he doesn’t?” she whispers

he just chuckles, lightly patting her cheek.

“i have to go see mikey” he smiles, “behave yourself”

“are you going to lock me in the room again?” she asks and he sighs

“no” he shakes his head, “you’re free to roam, just don’t run from me because i will find you”

“i want to see my friends” y/n says

he runs his hands through his hair.

“okay” he agrees, “but remember what i said”

“thank you” she says, sounding relieved.

“and keep your phone on” he adds and she nods

yuzuha nearly drops her glass in the sink when y/n walks into the kitchen.

“y/n?!” she grabs her into a tight hug and y/n laughs, a little startled.

“what’s going on?” yuzuha asks, “how did you—”

“you’re squeezing me” y/n pats her arm, “i’m fine, let me go so i can explain”

“is it true?” yuzuha asks, “did he do anything to you?”

“he didn’t do anything to me” y/n promises, “he let me come see you so maybe this isn’t even about me right now”

“your dad… he really did that shit?” yuzuha takes a hold of y/n’s hand

“yeah” she laughs bitterly, “it feels like a horrible joke”

“so you’re just gonna … stay?” yuzuha asks

“for now, yeah” y/n shrugs, “i think it’s better to just do what he asks”

“did you … meet them all?” yuzuha asks after a while, handing y/n a glass of water.

“no” she shakes her head, “just the brothers, their boss and sanzu”

“he gave you one of his cars?” yuzuha looks outside

“it’s probably because it’ll be easy to track me” y/n laughs, “i could still technically escape”

“so why don’t you?” yuzuha can’t help but ask

y/n doesn’t know how to answer that question so she looks down at the glass in her hands. was it weird that she felt safer in rindou’s house than her own?

“i can’t go home and he knows to look for me here” y/n shakes her head, “word would get out that i escaped and he’ll come here first”

“i also don’t know if my mother is involved or not so they could easily get her too” she adds, “it’s just better to stay with rindou, at least he’s nice”

“nice?” yuzuha huffs, “y/n don’t tell me you’re crushing”

“crushing?” y/n scoffs, “i met the guy at an auction where i was one of the prizes, it’s not exactly a meet cute situation”

yuzuha laughs. at least y/n could make light of a serious situation.

“you came back” rindou says and she’s surprised at how shocked he seems to be.

“did you think i’d run?” she asks, giving him his keys back.

“i gave you an out” he admits, “this has nothing to do with you”

“i don’t..want to go back there” she says, “my fat— that man, auctioned me off like a piece of meat.. he could do that again without hesitation”

“hey it’s okay” rindou says gently, “can i?”

 she nods and he pulls her in for a hug. he pats her head gently. he wasn’t sure what he was meant to be doing. he never had this kind of intimacy with his past relationships. it was always about the sex or business, nothing more and yet here he stood comforting the daughter of the man that crossed them.

“take a nap if you need to” he tells her, “dinner will be ready later”

“thank you” she sighs

“do you want to let her go now?” sanzu smirks, “that’s interesting”

“i don’t” rindou admits, “but i didn’t think it would get like this”

sanzu laughs. it was fun seeing rindou like this. the man was never girl crazy but he had his fair share of fun but rindou haitani didn’t care for anything other than his brother and work.

“word on the street is her father hired some low life gang bangers” sanzu grins, “think he’s trying to get her back by kidnap”

“what does mikey want to do?” rindou asks

“nothing” sanzu shrugs, “we’ll wait and see what the old fucker does”

“hm” rindou nods, reaching for his drink.

“isn’t glass dolls so much easier to deal with?” sanzu asks, “they can’t talk back and they don’t cause you to feel anything”

“and you have complete ownership” he adds

“i don’t want to own her” rindou scoffs, “not in the way you think”

“you have a soft spot for the girl” sanzu laughs loudly, tipping his head back.

rindou thinks his friends is so much prettier with his mouth shut.

y/n finds it harder and harder to sleep. a week has gone by but it feels longer and there’s been no calls or texts from her mother either. she’s starting to realise they must’ve been planning this for a very long time.

how else would her father know about that type of auctions? he had to be apart of it. she feels sick to her stomach that laying down only makes her feel dizzy and nauseous.

“you’re still awake” rindou says when he sees her in the kitchen. she startles and he grins, standing next to her as she pours him a glass of wine as well.

he likes how comfortable she seems to be in his space and that could pose as a problem because how would he be fine with her leaving?

he leans closer and if she notices, she doesn’t say anything.

“you haven’t been sleeping well” he says and she sighs. it wasn’t like she could deny it.

“would you like me to keep you company?” rindou asks

“rin—”

“i’ll just lay with you until you fall asleep” he adds, “i meant what i said, i won’t touch you unless it’s what you want”

“okay” y/n nods and lets him take her hand, leading her to the room she’s been staying in.

“just close your eyes for me darling” he smiles, “you’re safe with me”

she finds that she believes him. his warm next to her and she falls asleep.

“he gave you his card to go shopping?” yuzuha laughs, “oh my”

“it’s not like that” y/n says, “i don’t have anything of my own and i don’t think i’ll get it right now”

“have you spoken to chifuyu?” yuzuha asks, “he’s been asking about you”

“i texted him this morning” y/n shrugs, “i don’t want anyone making a big deal about this right now”

y/n walks around the clothing isle to look at dresses when she feels 2 men come up behind her.

“you scream and I’ll shoot your friend” he says, “walk forward and don’t make a scene”

she swallows hard and nods quickly. she doesn’t know what’s going on, was this bonten? was this rindou’s plan all along?

she wills herself not to cry as she walks out the store, she doesn’t look back even when she hears yuzuha call after her.

her phone vibrates in her pocket but she knows she can’t reach for it. none of this feels real.

“your fathers been expecting you y/n” the other man says, “get into the car”

father?

when she gets inside the black suv, she feels like throwing up. her father looks far too pleased to see her and he takes her hand and squeezes.

“you’re safe now dear, don’t cry anymore”

she hates him.

“i didn’t know who else to call” yuzuha cries, “one moment we were shopping the next she’s walking out the store with two men dressed in black suits”

taiju looks over at mikey who clenches his jaw. he looks angry, this wasn’t them.

“what’s going on?” yuzuha asks, “is this her father?”

“i’ll handle it” rindou says

“rindou” mikey says but rindou ignores him

“i said i’ll handle it” rindou walks out with ran following close behind.

“you aren’t hurt, are you?” her father asks but she doesn’t answer him. she won’t even look at him as the guards force her to sit down in his office.

he dismisses them and he sighs.

“you need to understand that i do what i must to take care of our family” he says

“you do what you must to take care of yourself” y/n scoffs, “you’re disgusting”

“you say that but i did everything for you” he laughs, “how else would you have everything you’ve ever wanted?”

“your mother was too soft on you” he adds dryly, “this was character building and you’ll do right to remember everything i do for you”

“what—”

“you’ll do as you’re told” he cuts her off, “i have spoken to a friend in italy and his son is around your age”

“excuse me?” y/n widens her eyes, “you’re still trying to sell me off?”

“don’t be so dramatic” he rolls his eyes, “it’ll be a legal marriage”

“i hate you” y/n stands and tries to leave but he grabs her arm.

before she can yank her arm away or scream, the sound of gun shots rings loud outside. she can hear the commotion and shouting before her father knocks her out.

the last thing she hears is the sound of the door opening and another gunshot.

her head is spinning when she opens her eyes. she feels the softness of her pillows and she’s got a cold cloth on her forehead.

“y/n?” rindou whispers

he dims the lights when she squints, sitting up slowly. she looks around the room and she feels herself crying.

“hey, it’s okay baby it’s just me” rindou sits beside her and she moves closer to him, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“it’s okay, you’re okay now” he says softly, “he’ll never hurt you again”

“did you…” she trails off

“i wanted to but i didn’t” rindou admits, wrapping his arms around her, “i did shoot him in the arm but he’ll be fine”

“he wanted to send me to italy” she sniffs, “he was never worried about me”

“i’m sorry” rindou says because he doesn’t know what else to say. he wasn’t good at comforting people but he’d try for her.

“do you want —”

“please just… kiss me” she says, “i want to be distracted for a while”

“your adrenaline is high” he pats her head, kissing her cheek, “you don’t want this”

“rindou i’m not a child” she frowns, ��i want this”

“how long?” he asks

“when you stayed with me the other night” she says, “i think i started liking you before then but i do”

“this situation isn’t exactly ideal” he sighs

“i don’t remember a time where a situation was ideal in my life” she scoffs, “especially after everything he said to me”

she did feel like her life was a lie, everything until now.

“rin” she whispers and he caves, leaning in to kiss her softly. he’s been thinking about this since the first night he saw her but it was so much better.

her tiny gasps and the way she wraps her arms around his neck makes him feel dizzy.

he pushes her gently onto the bed and she’s never been more happier to be wearing a skirt. it’s a pretty skirt that rindou had complimented her on.

“so fucking beautiful” he groans, spreading her legs further to fit himself in the middle.

she was far pretty than any doll he’s ever collected and her skin was soft and warm. she was real and all his.

“tell me what you want baby” he grins, “I’ll give you whatever you want”

“i just want you” she smiles shyly up at him and he’s imagined this moment far too often to ruin it.

“you have me” he smirks, running his fingers up her thigh before he reaches her panties.

“lift your hips” he playfully hits her thigh, “i’ll make you feel real good”

she does as she’s told and the next moment she finds herself flipped over onto her stomach. he doesn’t give her a moment to breathe before he slips his middle finger into her pussy.

she whines and he bites back a loud groan. she was so tight and wet, he needed to keep his composure because he had no desire to hurt her.

not unless it’s what she wanted and since this would be the first of many, he planned to make her remember this moment forever.

“so good” y/n moaned when she felt him add a second finger. he leaned down to bite down on her ass before kissing his way between her pretty legs.

“such a pretty pussy” he moans before he slips his tongue between his fingers.

she cries out, arching her back and he uses his free hand to spank her. he then grips her firmly so she can’t move away and begins a slow rhythm of eating her out and fingering her open.

“want more rin” she slurs, “please”

she's never been this open during sex, has never felt this good before and she knows she doesn’t want the feeling to go.

“so impatient” he chuckles but he’s already undressing. he wants to take his time with her but he can feel how hard he is and he knew he’d have enough time to explore.

right now, she wanted him and he’d be the perfect distraction for her.

“spread your legs a little more sweetheart” he says, rubbing his tip through her folds before pressing into her.

she bites down onto the pillow and he smirks. he knew he was big and thicker than most. this wasn’t the first time he’s had sex but he’s never had feelings for anyone before now and he feels lightheaded when he finally bottoms out.

“fuck” he grunts, “shit baby, keep still for me”

he could use the excuse that he just wants her to get used to the feeling but he’s the one that needs a moment. he didn’t want to embarrass himself but she felt so good around him that he couldn’t resist thrusting forward.

her moans are so pretty and she’s not shy to call his name over and over again.

“that’s it pretty girl” he says, “it’s all yours”

he feels her squeezing and clenching around him and it’s so hot and sticky that he can’t help but pull back a little to stare down at where he’s fucking into her.

they needed to be careful and they did have a lot to talk about but that could all wait.

“god baby, fuck yourself back on my dick” he groans, throwing his head back.

talking could wait, he wanted to focus on her and only her.

#[ 🪼 ] xfg writes #tokyo revengers rindou x reader #rindou haitani x reader #rindou haitani x you #rindou haitani x y/n #rindou smut #bonten rindou #bonten smut #bonten rindou haitani #bonten rindou smut #tokyorev rindou x you #tokyorev rindou x reader #tokyorev smut #tokyo rev x you #tokyo revengers smut #tokyo revengers rindou x you #tokyo revengers rindou x y/n

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taintandviolent · 2 months

Text

Devil's Favours - James March x Reader

summary & wordcount: 4.9K! originally chosen as the party favour for James' Devil's Night celebration, reader is quickly snatched away by James March, who would rather have his own fun with her than let the others kill her.

w a r n i n g s: DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT! dark fic, dub-con, slight non-con, conflicted reader, sexual confusion, mild gore & blood, graphic descriptions, violence, aggression, bodily fluids, mentions of other real serial killers, smut, rough sex,overstimulation, body worship (reader with greek goddess body type), murder, reader death.

a/n: sorry for this, I'm mentally unwell. not beta read, so if it's horrid and clunky, I'm sorry!!! also, I think this is the last taglist I'll be doing, RIP. It's just such a pain in the rear end, and half the time, it doesn't even work.

full fic & taglist under cut!↓ / ao3 link here! /

After a long day of travelling, sleep was the only thing on your mind. That said, you were in desperate need of a bath, something relaxing. This was, afterall, a vacation. You twisted the ceramic knob on the hot water, and stuck your hand under it. With a hiss, you withdrew your hand – usually, water took a minute to reach temperature. This one? Scalding hot within a few seconds. Dangerously so. You twisted the knob on the cold side, evening them out until they’d reached a less skin-melting combination, and shed your clothes. You’d only been in there for thirty minutes or so before someone began rapping their knuckles against your door. Persistently. Very persistently.

“Just a minute!” you called from the bathroom, hoping your voice travelled. You reached for one of the towels – meticulously embroidered with the hotel’s logo – and wrapped it hurriedly around your torso. “Hang on!”

Quickly rummaging around in your suitcase and swearing under your breath that you had packed more, you searched for something to wear. Feeling pressured and running out of time, you settled on a cream coloured silk slip. Hardly modest with your plenteous figure, but the knocking continued and that seemed more important than decency. You hurried to the door, yanking it open with an air of annoyance. The vexation melted away when you were met with a man who looked more like he belonged on a silver screen than he did standing in front of you.

“Good evening.” He said, dipping his head down in a courteous display.

“…Can I help you?”

His lips stayed together, but curved into a subtle smirk. Though it was an unintentional pick; he’d chosen well; your delectable form was as if it was carved by Gods themselves. The look in your eyes told him that you were so alive, so vivacious that any bloodshed that would happen would be akin to art. His eyes were immediately lost on you, exploring your body and face with a fervid fascination. Feeling exposed, you pulled at the silken straps, bringing the neckline of the nightgown higher up on your body. Your cleavage protested, the fabric puckering across the voluminosity of your breasts.

All this time, he’d been silent, and you arched an expectant brow, wondering just what it was that you were to help him with. This man was… peculiar. From his fancy dressage to the articulate, over-pronounced way he spoke, his idiosyncrasies both alarmed and fascinated you.

“Indeed,” he affirmed. He’d made his decision; you were the one for the night. And he’d have you, whether you came willingly or not.

“My name is James March — I’m the owner of this impressive hotel in which you now stand.” He paused, expectantly as if that was enough for you to throw your arms up and consent to whatever he was asking. When you didn’t, he added: “I need you to come with me. Urgently.”

You squinted, scanning his motivations. A warm, gentle smile stretched across his lips, framed by his pencil thin mustache. His hand rose, fingers uncurling in front of you. There was something unnervingly come-hither about his gaze. Would he have introduced himself with malicious intentions? Surely not — that could lead to identifying him later on. But he could’ve given you a fake name, perhaps…

Unable to resist his passé seduction and against (likely) better judgement, your hand floated up into his, resting delicately against his palm. His fingers closed around yours, lingering a moment before guiding you out of your room, allowing the heavy door to swing shut behind you. He began leading you briskly down the hallway.

“I forgot my key, wait I –”

“Worry not, my dear. We’ll have another made for you, should you need it.”

Should I need it? You thought. Why wouldn’t I need it? Of course I’ll need my key, I’m walking down the hallway in nothing but a nightgown.

You trodded barefoot down the halls, listening to the sounds as you passed them. The hotel, you noticed, creaked and breathed with a life of its own. Whether the rooms were occupied wasn’t known, but they sounded as if they were.

As soon as you two got to a door, only a few down from your own, he reached for the handle and instantly, as soon as he did; something felt wrong. Something felt… sinister and the feeling took over like a gelatinous sludge. You tried to yank your hand away but James sternly jerked you the opposite way — back towards him. With a throaty growl, he wrapped both arms around your torso, holding you fast in a steel grip so that try as you might, you couldn’t dislodge yourself from his grasp. His strength proved too much for your feeble, sleepy muscles.

After shouldering the door open, James carried you inside. In a moment of panicked clarity, you tried to peek around and identify anything you could. The stern way that his hand was plastered on your forehead, holding it against his shoulder, you could really only see the ornate ceiling above you.

You took a deep breath, fighting back the tears that burned at the corners of your eyes. This was it. You’d gone this far in life without being mugged, raped, or killed… today was the day it would change. Your track record would end. Abruptly. Terrifyingly. Your chest shuddered with an uneven, hysterical breath. At least he was handsome. No, shut up. That’s not the kind of thought you want to be thinking.

Suddenly, your body dropped forward and you were spun around harshly, his grip still tight on the fleshy meat of your arms. Then, as though he was a lover and not your soon-to-be-murderer, he eased your back against a wooden chair with one hand, delicately, suddenly concerned with hurting you, like you were some kind of easily-bruised fruit.

“Good girl, sit there.”

At his praising words, your core twinged, tightening. No, no. Stop it. Clenching your teeth, you quashed the thought before it went any further.

His right hand snatched something from a nearby table before holding it proudly, stretching it out for you to see; rope. Unconsciously, your head began shaking back and forth. As the realisation sunk in, your heart rate picked up, thudding against your ribcage.

“N-no, no… no please.”

With the rope still in hand, James got to one knee in a familiar pose. His lightless eyes floated up to yours, staring into them deeply. Now in front of you, his cock twitched within his trousers, a carnal instinct tugging like an incessant child. He brushed the pads of his fingers along the smooth curves of your knees, your calves, your ankles…

Damn. You – obviously – were a woman with needs, so his feather-light touch awoke something deep within your core again. This time though, it didn’t take you reversing the arousal. The shiny tip of his shoe knocked your feet apart, lining them up with the legs of the chair. She clenched harder.

“What are you doing?” You asked, tensely. “What the fuck are you doing?”

He paused to answer, straightening up. “Securing you, my dear. A struggle is inevitable.”

“What!? Inevitable for what?!”

He didn’t answer. Hastily working, his large but nimble hands wrapped the rope around the smallest part of your ankles, knotting the rope against the chair. Your wrists came next, and those were tied much tighter; the fibres of the rope ground against your soft skin, already causing a burning friction.

With a sudden, powerful pull at the bindings, testing their security, James was finished. He was confident in his knotting, you wouldn’t get away. Humming to himself, he dragged the chair through an archway, into another, much larger room. You were facing a table – it was ornately set with a large contraption in the middle. You recognised it as an absinthe fountain, the bright green liquid in the container seemed to glow. You didn’t want to be a part of whatever this was, even as attractive as that man was.

“Please,” you begged. “Please, I just… I want to go back to my room. Let me go.”

“Let you go?” James echoed in a mockingly high tone. He seemed offended that you’d even desire such a thing. It was a pleasure — a privilege — to be invited to his dinners. “No…. You’re staying with me. Right here.”

He pat your thigh before moving to the head of the table. For the first time since you’d been brought in, you took a moment to look around, to take in your surroundings instead of him. Immediately, you whimpered in disbelief — met with such a visual that you almost immediately thought you were hallucinating. You blinked away the tears and sniffed, pressing your lips tightly together.

It was truly bone-chilling to see all of the worst eyes on you. The eyes that had seen the most foul crimes and atrocities in human history were now looking at you; the bound beauty with her sweat-soaked strands of hair stuck to your forehead and fear in your eyes. John Wayne Gacy, Richard Ramirez, Jeffrey Dahmer….

“She’s shakin’ like a god damn leaf!” Aileen Wuornos howled, before finishing off the rest of her beer. She slammed it on the table, the clatter made you jump. She doesn’t want me, you thought. I’m not her enemy. Still, you knew that you’d been sat at a table full of people — true monsters — who even if they didn’t want to kill you, they’d take great pleasure in watching you writhe in agony as the others stole your last breath from your lungs.

Though they were all equally terrifying, you were most horrified by Richard. He sat directly next to James, picking absently at his nails. His sunken, snake eyes followed every move you made; watching you with a hunger that made your skin crawl. Considering the circumstances, it was laughable to say that one made you feel unsafer than the others — but he did. Logically, how he preyed upon women must’ve played into your distaste for him. He held your gaze, peering into your thoughts with a vicious lack of consent, as he behaved with every woman he came in contact with. Finally, he spoke.

“I’ve waited long enough, Jimmy — can we kill her?” He said, sucking something out of his rotting teeth. He made a move as though he was going to get up.

You snapped your head to James, brows knit together in pleading. The visual surprised you. He, like the rest of the dinner party, had been staring at you, but instead of the feral, blood hungry gaze you expected, his eyes had gone glassy. He sucked his cheeks in, deep in thought. Beneath the dark fabric of his dress pants, heat blanketed his groin. You captivated him; the way your precious little eyes flitted back and forth in terror like a deer, the way your pulse thrummed in your neck, beating like a drum. He wanted you for his own — and only his own. Keeping his motives hidden, James stood up, smoothing out the fabric of his suit jacket.

“No,” he crooned. “No, we can’t. I’m afraid I’ve had a change of heart… this one… belongs to me.”

You jerked your head in confusion, while grumbles of disappointment bounced off the walls. Ramirez said something sickening and Gacy let out a horrible, guttural chuckle. You strained against the rope, somehow trying to put more distance between you and them. James sliced his hand through the air to silence them both.

“Miss Wuornos,” he abruptly purred. “Go find us a dashing young man keen to join our party!”

“Ohohoh…. Lil’ ol’ me? Find a man? I’m gonna’ be frolickin’ in the fuckin’ daisy fields with this one. Be back!”

“Pl-please.” You begged. Your lips parted, allowing desperate promises to fall from between them. You wouldn’t tell anyone, you’d never come back here, you wouldn’t remember anything, you promised, you would never speak a word of this to anyone… You looked to James, who regarded you affectionately, but patronisingly, his lower lip jutted out in a faux-pout. He’d heard all this before, and it was of no concern to him. He’d made up his mind. It was his god damned birthday and he was going to have you all to himself.

Your begging fell on seemingly deaf ears, nobody bothered to entertain you. Your teary, burning eyes flitted to Ramirez, who was smiling his ugly, decaying smile at you, leaning forward in his seat. “I dunno’, she promises, Jimmy… maybe we should let her go.”

You shivered, grinding your wrists against the rope. Anger blanketed you. “Fuck off, weirdo.”

“Who you callin’ weirdo, bitch?”

“YOU!” You barked, straining. “I can smell your rancid breath from here. Had to kill all those women just because none of them would ever come within ten fucking feet of you!”

“Now, now… manners. She’s a lively one, isn’t she?” His mouth bent in a proud smirk, James looked to Richard, who was still bristling from the comment. He really wanted to kill you. Delighted at the fact that James had seemingly given you immunity, you wiggled happily in your chair, fighting the urge to stick your tongue out. You didn’t want to test him, though, and so you remained silent, watching instead.

Silence was broken as the door opened. With a little thrashing, almost as desperate as your own had been, Aileen shoved a man — couldn’t have been more than 30 — inside. It didn’t take her long to find someone. In fact, it was like she opened the door, spotted him meandering by and dragged him back inside.

The guy noticed you first. Second, he noticed that you were tied to the chair so tightly that red marks on your wrists and ankles had begun to develop. Thirdly, he noticed the others, his eyes drifting slowly and visibly disturbed by who sat at the table.

“Woah… what the fuck is this?” He asked.

“A good fuckin’ time is what it is.” One of them said. You didn’t care which. Blisteringly hot tears streamed down your face, stinging your cheeks. What were the stages of grief? You felt like you were cycling through them in rapid succession.

“Fucking let me go!” You howled, thrashing your torso back and forth, which did little to relieve anything. With a distressed expression plastered upon his face, the guy looked from you to the other guests and back, before nervously putting his hands up, taking one step back towards the door. “Hey, is she okay?”

“N—!“ James was suddenly behind you, cupping his hand over your mouth, pressing the tips of his fingers hard into your cheek flesh. His lips moved quickly, whispering hotly into your ear. “Hush now, don’t spoil the surprise for him. Let him find out on his own.”

“She’s fine, the hors d’oeuvres didn’t agree with her.” Aileen barked, towing the guy towards the table. She shoved him down into the only unoccupied seat.

“Dinner… is served.” James said.

In unison, they all stood up. The sound of the chair legs scraping against the floor echoed in your head. Like syncronised swimmers, they all descended upon him, armed with whatever weapon they’d chosen. You hadn’t known the guy, but he had enough sympathy for you to make you cry at what was happening to him. He’d had a life, family… feelings. None of which mattered to him anymore, or perhaps that’s exactly what he was thinking about. Perhaps your entire life really did flash before your eyes before you died.

You let out a scream that burned on its way out. It ached and tore and ripped its way up your windpipe as the shrill, bloodcurdling sound filled the room. It was louder than his, and louder than the sounds that were currently coming from the gaping, gargling hole in his throat.

Gacy moved from his side, allowing you a brief glimpse. Torn flesh hung from his shoulders and blood had almost completely covered the front of his body. You closed your eyes and turned your head away, rolling your lips inward and biting down. It was fucked up, and you weren't going to absorb any more of it.

“Sweet dreams, my little pet.” James said, in front of you. You turned your head towards the sound, but were met with blackness.

A dull throbbing on the side of your head was what eventually pulled you awake, forcing your cinder-block weighted lids to peel apart. You looked around; an odd, minimally decorated room. Dark. Your head wobbled as you turned it left, then right, met with the same visual — your arms suspended high above your head, and rope again, at your wrists. You licked your lips and tasted metal. In your blurred vision, you noticed red flecked along your breasts. The ache on the side of your head was more than just an ache, it seemed.

Your consciousness ebbed, fading in and out. Sleep was comforting, the idea of it cradling you in its arms like a baby. You wanted so badly to sleep… just for a moment. Somewhere inside, you heard authoritative voices, advising against sleep. Concussions… sleep… sleep is bad… keep the individual conscious. And so you fought against the cool, towering shadow, turning your head away from nothing in particular. You couldn’t hear anything outside of your own laboured breathing, and the creak of the rope every time you decided to move. Nothing. Not even the muted voices of the monsters.

Time meant nothing, you lost track of how long you’d been hanging there when you’d finally heard the creak of a heavy door. You squeezed your eyes shut tightly before wrenching them open. You weren’t sure if the crushing weight you felt was the looming weight of death as it shrouded you, or merely the physical strain of your body being suspended for hours. You knew people could eventually die from suspension. Their lungs caved in or something. The tips of your toes barely touched the floor, your big toe grazing the cold, concrete floor every time your body swayed softly.

With your head hanging between your shoulders, your muscles quivered as you lifted it, just in time to see the door in front of you shut. James, standing in front of it, reached for a black leather apron that hung on a hook. Before slipping it over his head, he flashed you a charming smile, pleased to see that you hadn’t expired yet. Reaching behind him to tie it around his waist, he approached you. The light from the wall sconces reflected against the fabric dully.

“Ah, there you are.” He crooned.

You intended a scream, but could do nothing but whimper. You swallowed repeatedly, a feeble attempt to wet your dried out throat. James drug a single finger along your soft jawline, trailing it down your neck, and along your collarbone. You were drenched in sweat, streaks of it descending your face and neck.

The sudden ferocity in which he gripped your face made it sting, his thumb and forefinger digging into the bone of your jaw. He quirked a brow. You opened your mouth and although your throat was already raw, you finally screamed. You screamed again, angrily, and held his cold, black gaze. Your ragged shrieks filled the room over and over again as you tried, desperately, to wrench your hands free from the ropes.

Regrettable, James thought as his soulless eyes hungrily took in your form as it quivered and thrashed around. You were built like a Greek goddess, soft curves in all the right places, begging to be touched, worshipped.

“Aaaah,” He exhaled, frustratedly. “You’re almost too pretty to kill.”

“Then — DON’T! Fucking let me GO! AaaarhhhH!” You yanked at the ropes again, thrashing around until a deep pain in your shoulder began to burn. You cried out, letting your body go slack.

With a deep breath, you mustered up all your strength again, finding every drop of it within your tired body, and leaned forward to scream directly in his face. The result? He was wholly unphased by your screams. If anything, it seemed like he enjoyed them. Each one sounded a little more desperate than the last, and it only fuelled him further.

You decide to try a new, last-ditch tactic. Sore mouth contorting into a scowl, you gathered a mouthful of saliva and blood, hot and irony on your tongue and lunged forward, spitting it at him. The glob hit him square in the face, dripping slowly down towards his jaw.

“What, is it hard to focus?” You croaked. Your words were slurred, messy with the pain of the head wound. “Didn’t think you’d want to fuck me as bad as you do, huh?”

James’ dark eyes narrowed, the muscles underneath twitching faintly. He had in fact picked you, and therefore had to accept all of your fiery little quips as they came – but that one… that one had caught him off guard.

“You…” You narrowed your eyes, the fibres of the rope squeaking as you leaned towards him, your lips inches from his face. “…want to fuck me so bad, you can’t think. Look at you. You think your apron hides it?”

With brows raised, James glanced at his groin. Had he really been betrayed by his own body, so early on? Though he felt the warmth and stiffness increasing between his legs, there was no visual indication. James calmly brought his hand to his face, collecting the bloodied spit on his fingertips. With a reticent gaze, he brought them down between your legs, harshly knuckling the nightgown out of the way.

He smeared them roughly on your cunt. Your own fluids. The ones that you had just spit at him. Not only that, but he proceeded to tease your sensitive nerves with his fingers, pulling a confused gasp from your throat. Part of you had been bluffing, you weren’t entirely sure that he had wanted you —

James pulled back an inch to look at you again. Aside from your luscious body, your complexion was mottled with exhaustion, lips dry with fear, hair frazzled and bloody on one side. To him, it was a horrific sculpture of divinity. One that he had created in such little time with such little effort. The perfect, ample curves of your breasts were dotted with crimson, having dripped from the gash on your head. They jiggled delicately with each desolate shake you gave.

With his free hand, he took hold of your round, plush hips, his thumb working the softness like dough. He swung you towards him, pressing the pillowy tops of your thighs to his groin. Quickly, he identified a growing obsession with your body.

He loved it. All of it. In fact, he hadn’t seen a body as marvellously breathtaking as yours since his wife’s. Of course, it had been many years since he’d seen hers in any such manner, so the flames that licked at his desire were deprived, hungry ones. His mouth found yours, lips crushing against yours. His tongue, hot and strong, slipped in and beckoned yours to engage in an erotic dance.

He pulled your body closer, pressing it tightly against his. Though constricted by his trousers, you felt the bulging heat beneath his apron, and rubbed your thigh against it, teasing him. He groaned deeply in response, bucking his hips against you to force friction. After a few moments, James broke the kiss, panting heavily over your tender, swollen lips.

“Pl-please… don’t kill me… please…”

The back of his hand whipped across your mouth, hitting you so hard that the world sparkled when you opened your eyes again. Your face burned with the contact.

“Enough of that now! Say it again, and I’ll do just that!”

The harshness in his voice stunned you. Up until that point, he’d been using his syrupy, serenading voice — the one he had used to charm you into coming with him. Now, he bellowed, an unexpected violence. Silence hung heavy between you as he waited, baited you to beg for life once more. You didn’t speak again, but your sobs continued.

Finally, his hand dropped between your legs again. Your clit ached, burned with the way his fingers fondled it, but he didn’t stop. Your poor, exhausted body trembled beneath his touch, doing all it could to express arousal. Salty droplets streamed from your hairline into your eyes, stinging as they absorbed.

“Would you rather die?” he asked, suddenly.

“Wh-what? N-no… I d-don’t want to die…”

“That’s not what I meant, my little ember. I meant… would you rather die than be pleasured? I, of course, can arrange that.”

You hesitated a moment, but finally, shook your head.

At this thoughtful confession, James angled forward, plunging a single finger inside of you, past the knuckle. The digit wiggled inside of you briefly, before sliding back out slowly. He held it up for you both to see. “Oh,” he growled.

His finger was generously coated in clear slick. Your body had betrayed you.

Wordlessly, he untied the apron, tossing it carelessly to the side – it hit the floor with a heavy flop. Then, those same nimble fingers began unbuttoning and unzipping, until they gripped his rigidness, pumping it slowly for further stimulation. His chest heaved with wanton, desiring breaths as he stared at you, hanging there, with your warm, ample body for his taking. James lined his dick up with your leaking slit, and pulled you harshly onto his cock, showing no mercy for how exhausted your body was.

Your cunt swallowed his cock whole, hungrily and desperately. His head fell back between his shoulders, a throaty groan coming from his open mouth. He began thrusting, slow at first. The ease of thrusting fascinated him; your body hung limp on the ropes and all James had to do was tug you forward, tug you in the direction he wanted you to go.

“You know, I’ve never taken a woman like this before - suspended in the air,” he said, breathily. “Exquisite.”

You mewled in response, snot dripping from your nose.

Soon, the room was filled with wet, slick thrusting and the thudding sound of his torso as it met yours. You came repeatedly, coating his thick, pale cock in fluids you didn’t even know your body could make. At one point, during a particularly vicious thrusting, a warm, watery liquid splashed down over your thighs. You screamed like he was killing you, though he felt better than any man you’d ever been with, pleasuring you in ways that left you feeling breathless.

Still, your body persisted with its aches. So far, you’d been successful in appealing to his sexual nature, and decided to try again.

“….please…. Let me down… I’ll… d-do anything you wa—

Suddenly, he backed up, pulling the head from your cunt with a slick pop. You panted; fragile, pitiful breaths, barely enough energy to lift your gaze. With his rigid cock bouncing in front of him, James untied your hands, allowing your heavy, enervated body to fall into his arms. You couldn’t help but cry into his shoulder as he carried you to some sort of surface, laying you carefully down atop it. Some streak of mercy had captured him, and you mouthed words of gratitude. Your entire body buzzed with relief, your muscles aching in a funny, tingling way.

James wasted no time in fucking you again; the tip was nearly scarlet, hungry for release. His hand compressed on your soft stomach, pressing down into it to increase the pressure of his cock as it drove deeper and deeper inside of you.

“You know how this ends, my dear.” When he spoke, it sounded far away. But you did. You knew. There was never any end to this besides the one that you’d envisioned fearfully. He leaned to the side, retrieving a small, but very, very sharp blade from a nearby metal table. You watched numbly as James lifted the knife above your neck.

His hips pumped rhythmically, bringing you both closer to the fiery edge of ecstasy. Pulsing veins massaging your silklike insides, and another orgasm galloped towards you. Your body quivered, cold sweats taking over.

James whipped the knife across your perfectly warm neck, and instinctively, your hands went to the laceration. Bright crimson gushed out from the spaces between your fingers, and you felt a gushy warmth press against your digits. The inner workings of your throat, you realized. The gore of your own body, pressing back against you in its heat. James laid one hand over yours, seemingly just to feel the blood as it spurted. With a deep, guttural moan, his cock twitched inside you just before it released, coating your insides.

She gasped, a wet gurgle. The light left her eyes, gradually, but beautifully. The pulses of blood eventually ebbed to a dull trickle. As his thrusts slowed, he expelled a long sigh – killing both excited him and depressed him. On one hand; it brought exhilaration, delight and sheer unadulterated arousal. On the other however, you only truly got to do it once. Certainly, you could kill a ghost a million times over, but the effect wasn’t the same.

For a moment, James’ expression contorted into one of regret; when you returned in your new spectral form, you’d likely not want to spend time with him. Yet another woman who loathed his presence roaming the hallways, avoiding him. But perhaps, he still wouldn’t mind having you stuck with him for all eternity, if only to gaze upon your perfect form whenever you’d let him. With matching wounds, at that. A true romantic.

t a g l i s t : @kaismanwich / @garykingz / @elsamars / @silverzoomies / @tatesdisasterofalover / @thewolveswithin / @80strashbag / @twinkiemaximoff / @spill-the-t / @stucktothetwo / @enchanting-evan / @yesdevineruler / @anonymous0316 / @eventually27 / @my-own-walker / @kai-slut / @demxnicprxncess / @fuckedbykai / @iluwmycats / @dewberryobssesed / @the-goblin1 / @dirtyfairy97 / @jellyluvr / @strangerthings420 / @kai-anderson-whore / @babygorewhore / @quickandsilvers / @tatelangdonsweater / @ifeeltoofuckingmuch / @howtobesasha / @randominstake / @throwinginmythai / @slvt4jamesmarch / @poltoreveur / @feefymo / @evpeters87 / @lacucarachapisser / @stveharringtn / @fear-is-truth

#fuck it we ball #James Patrick March #James Patrick March x you #James Patrick March x reader #james march x reader #ahs smut #ahs fanfiction #AHS Hotel #American Horror Story Hotel #myfics

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stevenose · 9 months

Text

this was supposed to be a blurb. it’s not a blurb. it’s rather long. sorry.

contains: reader with a vagina and breasts; mean!steve; tied up reader 🫢; overstimulation; controlled orgasms; toys; squirting; a bit of sub!space for reader; aftercare!

you’d played it up too much.

steve should’ve known it was a joke. well, you figure he does know you were joking. but the man can only hear you boast about your new vibrator so many times before he’s feeling a little left out.

“can’t come over tonight,” he’d said a few days ago, sighing into the phone. “gotta work late, honey.”

“it’s fine,” you pouted, and then you smiled wide. “i’ve got my vibrator to keep me company, anyway.”

steve scoffed into the phone, the lilt of his smile palpable in his voice. “yeah, okay. keep that up, baby.”

and so you did, because if there’s one thing you love, it’s seeing steve struggle. he’s not truly upset - if he was, he’d have told you. but he thinks it’s important that you remember precisely who he is to you, and who you are to him.

walking in on you playing with that stupid thing was just the perfect opportunity.

“what are you doing?”

you can tell by his tone, his hands placed on his hips, that you’re in that not-real trouble that usually ends with you crying euphorically and steve cuddling you. you can stop it here, but you don’t. you want it to continue.

“uh,” you breathe, placing your wand to the side. “i was just getting ready for you.”

he scoffs, removes the space between you two with a few steps forward. “yeah, i don’t think so,” he says, ripping your comforter back to drink up your naked figure. he can smell your arousal, nostrils flaring. he grabs your wand and holds it up, taunting you with it. “this is it, huh? this is what’s better than me?”

and, like, it’s factual. steve does not vibrate, steve does not have the same precision. you’d take him over it in a heartbeat, but, yeah, you’d say it’s better than him. so you nod, fingers playing uncertainly with the hem of your shirt.

“okay,” he says. “then don’t let me stop you. actually - here, let me help.”

now your hands are tied up to your bed frame with some old silk ribbon and he’s bullied himself in between your thighs to keep them spread. your shirt is discarded to the side, leaving you naked for him. he’s still clothed. it gets you hot.

“where’s that other one, huh?” he asks, leaning over you to rifle through your bedside table. “oh, this?”

he pulls out a silicone dildo. it fits you quite perfectly, not long and thick like steve is. it’s comfortable. he brings it to your mouth, watching your eyes widen with satisfaction. “come on, this is how you do it, right?”

you lick it, a little bit innocently, just to watch steve’s eyes darken. he ends up spitting on it before lining it up with your opening and pushing it inside of you with a wet squelch that makes you cringe.

“huh,” he says. he makes no attempt to play with it once it’s in. “fits really nice, honey. definitely better than i do.”

what he’s saying is, you can’t take me. you can’t handle my cock. which is true, but right now you want to prove it false. you frown and lift your hips in an attempt to seduce him, but he just rolls his eyes and pushes them flush to the mattress.

“know how much you like bein’ full,” he mumbles, grabbing the wand and placing it snug against your clit. “actually, sweetheart, i’d say i know exactly what’s best for you. don’t you think?”

you bite your lip and contemplate. “i don’t know….”

“okay,” he says simply, and turns the vibrator on.

you gasp. steve has it pressed up against you cruelly, directly on the head of your clit with ample pressure. it feels good, but maybe too good. you keen and steve continues to keep it in place, spreading his knees so your thighs follow suit. “don’t run away from it. aren’t you obsessed with this thing?”

“mhm,” you moan, teeth puncturing your lower lip. “ah!! it - mmm, feels so good.”

“i’m glad.” he doesn’t touch you as much as you wish he would. he just keeps your legs spread and the vibrator on your clit. “i want to see what this does to you, see what i’m missing out on.”

which is almost a little sweet, but you’re not fooled. you know he’s going to make this hard for you, pulling the wand away right when you’re on the edge and watch you cry for him to fuck you. he just needs his ego stroked a little bit, that’s all.

so you’re shocked when he lets you cum with no issues, just staring down at your face, looking like he’s learning something. like maybe he made a discovery. and you’re even more shocked when the vibrator stays pressed nice and snug between your legs.

“wait -“ you gasp, “it’s - steve - that’s -“

“what?” he asks. “thought you loved this thing, honey, don’t tell me you don’t want it now.”

your legs try to shut, but steve’s in the way. your hands tug at the silk, but it doesn’t budge. you throw your head back and groan, the constant stimulation making your hips jerk. it doesn’t necessarily hurt, but it doesn’t feel good, either. still, the constant vibrations are working on your clit, and it’s not immune to the wand’s magic.

you twist, helpless. you’re no where near backing down or wording out, but it’s overwhelming. especially with steve staring at you with a shit eating grin, drinking you up. “yeah, feels real good, doesn’t it.”

eventually, when his wrist gets sore from chasing your hips, he slams your legs shut with the wand still in between. “keep them there,” he growls, jumping off the bed to find a belt. he secures your thighs together with it, the wand still stuck on your clit, your cunt still filled with a dildo. with this new freedom, steve’s able to really torment you, to watch your body quiver and jerk.

“you were right,” he sighs, big hands moving up the sides of your torso. “this does do a better job than me. i’ve never made you squirm like this before, have i? have i?”

you shake your head, the only sound coming out of your mouth a long, high-pitched whine. though the head of the wand isn’t pressed mercilessly against your clit, it’s still nearing unbearable. your second orgasm hits you out of nowhere, making you gasp and shout and keen.

“jesus,” steve moans, palming himself. “you have no idea how hard you make me.”

you’re sweating now, hairline beaded with it. your third orgasm is fast approaching, as if your body knows you’re in for a few rounds and wants to get them out of the way. your toes curl and you twist again, squeezing your eyes shut and gasping. “steve holyfuckingshit shit shit shit shit-“

“what’re you saying my name for?” he asks, pulling himself out of his jeans quickly, jerking off over your form. “i’m not doin’ anything ‘cept letting you feel good. you feel good, don’t you, honey?”

“too good!” you wail, your orgasm building a lot slower and more intensely than usual.

“aw,” he says pitifully. “sounds like you made a mistake, huh?”

you can’t answer as your third orgasm rips through you, knocking the air out of your lungs and any words left dead in your throat. you can only scream after the peak, head thrown back against your wet pillowcase.

“shhh,” steve says harshly. “you always this loud when you use it? gotta put something in your mouth to shut you up?”

“please,” you beg, a few tears making their way out of your eyes with exertion. “it’s so so much.”

“are you okay?”

“shut - yes,” you moan, “just keep being mean.”

he laughs and twists one of your nipples, grinning widely when you squeal. “you can take it, baby. i’m tellin’ you, i know what’s best for you.” he stops touching himself to bend your knees and lift your legs so he can see your cunt. he whistles, something about it making you embarrassed. “you pushed your toy out,” he tells you. you had no idea, but you can tell when he slowly pushes it back into your dripping hole. “jesus, your pretty little pussy is such a mess. i thought that dick was perfect for you, what’d you push it out for?”

you don’t have an answer.

“you think it’s too small?” he asks, resting a hand on the back of your knee and touching himself again, jerking quickly. his balls ache from watching you. “i don’t know, maybe you just need to be better at taking it.”

your eyes fall shut as you squirm again, trying to get away from the relentless torture, away from steve’s prying eyes.

“your cunt’s crying,” he frowns again. “i thought you liked your toys, baby, what’s she crying for?”

your back arches and fingers and toes flex as your fourth orgasm rolls through your body. it’s hot this time, hardly enjoyable. your clit hurts and your core aches, the fake cock inside of you not stretching you like you want. like steve’s cock would.

“i’m sorry!” you cry, shaking your head. “you… you….”

he tsks, a hand squeezing your tit. “poor thing can’t even talk.”

deviously, he moves his hand down your sternum and pushes hard once he reaches your bladder. you gasp and lift off the bed, eyes wide, mind suddenly clear. “don’t!”

“don’t what?” he asks innocently, pushing down firmly with the same pressure. your eyes roll back, a tugging starting from your lower stomach and meeting at your opening. “honey, i don’t think you can squirt from such a tiny cock.”

which proves true as he continues his little pushes, making your tummy dip in - that feeling of letting go on the horizon but unattainable. and now you want it so bad that it’s making you cry. you want to make a mess all over his cock while he pounds parts of you only he knows. everything feels so mechanical now, the wand whirring uniformly, the dildo inside of you stiff.

you’re crying, taking shuddering breaths. steve can’t take it anymore, his cock ready to burst. hell, he might be able to cum a few times, too, just from watching you. “where?” he grits out. “can’t do it on your pussy since i don’t belong there.”

you choke out something that sounds like please, hips pushing up again, but steve’s made up his mind already. he works his way up your body on his knees and angles his cock towards your lips. “you wanna taste?” he asks, slapping it against the bridge of your nose. he knows you’re close with how you’re moving, your eyes crossing before squeezing shut.

“tell me my cock’s better,” he asks, watching a drop of precum hit between your eyebrows. “tell me it’s nicer than your stupid fucking toys.”

“better,” you moan, “nicer.”

he’ll take it. when your mouth drops open, right on the brink, he cums with a growl directly onto your tongue.

his animalistic moans, and the taste of him on your tongue, push you over one final time. you scream, chest heaving, and steve has to use his thumb to keep your mouth open as he strokes out the last few drops of his spend. you keep your mouth open after, fucked stupid, and he gently closes your jaw. “swallow and i’ll let you go.”

you show him your tongue after and he whistles low again before clambering off of you to turn the toy off. you’re panting and twitching and steve rubs his soft hands up and down your hot skin. he gives you a moment to catch your breath before he unbuckles your thighs, removes the toys, and unties your hands. he rubs the raw skin, placing gentle kisses to it.

“you alright, sweet thing?” he asks, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“uh-huh.” you’re dazed, a dumb smile on your face as you bask in your afterglow. steve kisses you and helps you stretch gently, fingers rubbing soothingly into your aching muscles.

“let me go get a washcloth, okay?” he whispers, and you whine immediately, wrapping your arms around him. his warmth and weight is soothing. you never want him to leave. he giggles and kisses your ear. “aren’t you cold, honey? let me clean you up and get some pj’s on you.”

“no,” you moan, slowly wrapping your legs around his waist, his cock hardening as it hits your wet folds. “need you.”

you always do this. fucked or teased or edged to the point of stupidity and then still crying because he won’t fuck you. he sighs, goosebumps forming on his skin as he slowly rubs himself against you. “you can take it?”

you nod into his shoulder and gasp happily when he pushes inside. he gasps, too, at how tight and hot and wet you are, even after all of that. he’s careful with your clit, only letting his pelvis knock against it. he shivers and moans into the pillow behind you, chasing your wet heat.

“wanna cum,” you whimper, taking one of his hands and placing it back on your bladder. “wanna….”

steve grits his teeth, angles his cock, and pushes down. you gasp and squirt around him with a soft moan, too tired for theatrics, soaking his cock while your lower body shakes. you’d felt stunted until then, and now you’re exhausted. you gently rock your hips as steve cums inside of you, biting your shoulder as he does. “mmmphfuckkk, honey, shit.”

your legs slide off of his hips, shaking almost violently, but you’re pleased, filled up with steve’s cum. he kisses you as he pulls out and away, cupping your tear-stained cheek.

“washcloth,” you mumble, and he nods, standing up on his own shaking legs. “‘n a nap?”

“whatever you want, peach,” he promises, kissing you one more time before ambling off towards the bathroom. lazily, your head shifts to look at your beloved wand, and you shove it off the bed, not caring when you hear it break.

#stevenose posts #steve x reader #ns/fw #mean!steve

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politemenacephd · 3 months

Text

Arachnophilia (Part Sixteen)

Drider!Miguel O'Hara x Reader (+18)

Chapter Masterlist 🕷️

Content: Mild Voyeurism, Fingering, Oral (reader giving), Fear Kink, Monster Fucking, Spicy bath time.

Word count: 4640

The morning rolled in with a thick coat of mist, one that settled beneath the tree line and obscured everything in a soft, white void. It was a peaceful, isolated world out here.

Up in the nest you were only just barely stirring, sleepily mumbling as you rolled beneath the silk sheets.

Mig, however, was wide awake. He was watching you as you slowly shifted onto your side, nestling into his fur. His eyes were endlessly endeared. He didn’t want to be strange, and he had enough distant memories of his humanity to know that watching you sleep might seem like odd behaviour, but he loved it too much.

Watching you live in his presence, even doing small things like sleeping or shuffling in the sheets or eating or bathing, it was such a comfort to him. Seeing you exist was fascinating. Perhaps he was still stuck trying to convince himself you were real.

His eyes moved to the window, noting the light outside. It was getting towards dawn, and you’d likely need to return to the society today. What a shame, he thought, his fur bristling with discomfort. He would have to see you off again.

It was in that soft melancholy that he suddenly remembered something rather important. He bent and awkwardly shifted the sheet around your thighs.

God, the heat that erupted in his chest at just the sight, it was maddening. Your soft, plush skin, coated in little red marks and shimmering with the leftover trails of cum and sweat and slick, it made him weak. He coughed to stop himself from going too far, and quickly moved to cover you again.

You couldn’t go to the society like that. You’d be so uncomfortable, and he didn’t want you to be embarrassed, poor thing. Plus, you’d probably want to talk with him about what happened last night, if not right now then at some point before you had to face Miguel yourself.

Gently he bent and pressed a kiss to your forehead, his soft forelegs pawing at your hair to wake you.

‘Mi tesoro?’

You blinked, your eyes squinting as they adjusted to the light.

‘Mm?’

It was all you could get out, and yet Mig’s smile only widened. ‘Sweet thing. You are so sleepy, mi bella durmiente.’

‘You tired me out’ you grumbled, your face half obscured now by his black and red fluff.

‘I know. I apologize.’

‘Oh, no—don’t apologize, my god, I am- very grateful’ you said, your face half turned to reveal a lazy half-smile. His own smile widened until his fangs were bared, their pearly sheen glinting in the pastel dawn light.

‘Sweet thing’ he repeated, ‘sweet little spider. I’m sorry, but, I believe you will have to leave soon. For the society. Would you, like me to help you get clean?’

Immediately you groaned, your smile fading as you nestled deeper into the sheets. ‘Oh no, not the spring. It’s freezing.’

‘You do not like the spring?’

‘It’s—it’s an outdoor spring, Mig, it’s COLD. I can handle it sometimes but—oh, god, I’m gonna have to aren’t I?’

Miguel grunted. Even your minor distress perturbed him deeply.

‘No, no, don’t you worry mi tesoro. I didn’t realize you felt that way. I will…’ He paused to think, his paws tapping back and forth like fingers drumming on a piece of wood. ‘I will… we have that basin, downstairs, I can fill it with water from over the fire. I’ll warm it for you. Would that be, acceptable?’

‘Mm… Are you sure Miggy?’ you said, awkwardly manoeuvring onto your elbow so you could see him. ‘I don’t—’

‘Mi arañita, how many times do we go over this? I like to do things for you.’ Mig bent as he spoke, his forehead coming down to nestle against yours. His breath as he huffed was warm and sweet on your face, and his eyes up against yours were so round and wide and red. You bumped his nose with your own and heard that strange little chuckle erupt in his throat.

‘I like to do things for you’ he murmured. ‘So let me. Please.’

You sighed, but, this time you capitulated easily. ‘Okay. Okay. I’ll do the warm water thing. And to be nice, I’ll even let you watch’ you said with a slight smile.

The unironic joy in his face made you giggle.

‘You are- very, nice to look at, when you bathe’ Mig breathed. ‘Though that, may be more to do with the coldness. You look, very… tight. Very…’

‘Perky. You wanna say perky, right?’ you said, your face tilting to catch his eye. You could see he looked embarrassed.

‘Yes, that- yes. Yes. But I will put that aside to ensure you are warm. Now you go back to resting.’

While you nestled back into the sheets Mig rose to his feet and began creeping towards the door. He had that soft, dumb smile on his face even then, but it faded as he pushed the door aside.

That smell was still there.

That smell. Him.

He hadn’t left.

Mig shot one look back at you as you snuggled up into the sheets. You seemed unphased, likely either ignorant or unbothered by the man’s presence. Either way was good. He darted his head once, twice, before deciding to finally descend and face him.

As Mig settled on the dewy grass below the nest he found Miguel right where he’d left him last night; back to the tree, slumped on the ground with his knees turned up and his arms folded, his whole body looking sickly and exhausted.

Mig thought about ignoring him, but something made him stay. He didn’t look at Miguel with the fear he used to, but most surprisingly he didn’t feel that same animosity from last night. He was annoying, yes, and a verifiable menace, but a threat? After seeing the man on the floor, whining, watching him mate with his partner with those needy eyes, it was hard to even be angry at him.

He’d won. Now he just felt bad.

‘You remained, I see’ Mig said, his breath condensing hard in the air.

Miguel scowled, his lack of sleep obvious by the dark circles beneath his eyes. He refused to meet Mig’s gaze as he gently patted over.

‘We have a set-up here if you need to bathe’ Mig said, his legs folding so that he could sit beside him. Miguel stiffened. ‘I built a full uh, well as full as it can be out here, bathroom set-up for mi tesoro to use. You are welcome to—’

‘Shut up’ Miguel snapped. Mig blinked, unphased.

‘Well, it still stands. I don’t know if you’re going to continue this charade of watching but if so you may want to consider your health long term. It gets cold out here.’

‘Why are you—so, calm?’ Miguel said, his eyes shamelessly roaming the man’s body. Mig blinked again.

‘Well, you’re not a threat anymore’ he said, matter-of-factly. Miguel seethed at how unbothered he was; there wasn’t a trace of denial or false confidence in his tone, he truly didn’t see Miguel as a problem anymore.

‘You’re a fool if you think that’ Miguel replied.

‘I am, not, though, am I?’ Mig noted. To Miguel’s horror, the spiders red eyes moved over to a particular patch of grass, one slightly dewier than the others. Miguel felt his face burning up.

‘I sensed you, relieving yourself, last night. Don’t worry, I—didn’t tell them.’

‘Oh, how noble of you’ Miguel sarcastically grunted.

‘I find it, grotesque, but… you showed me sympathy before, and I don’t forget that. I will choose to show you sympathy here.’

‘Get away from me.’

‘I do not want to be at odds with you’ Mig said gently.

‘You—fucked them in front of me!’ Miguel spat, suddenly jolting to try and subdue the large man. Mig looked down, unphased, as Miguel seethed and huffed, his fangs bared.

‘Yes. I know. I don’t apologize for it. You could have left, but you didn’t. You wanted to watch, and I made sure you understood finally that I am not your sad little scapegoat anymore. You needed humbling.’

Mig’s cold, calculated, and yet wholly earnest rebuttal brought Miguel to his metaphorical knees. He couldn’t fight this. He was still plotting internally, rocked by conflicting feelings of anger, guilt, confusion, and somehow admiration.

‘What is your problem, sir?’ Mig asked genuinely. ‘I don’t understand. I don’t believe you truly love my little spider—’

‘Ay por Dios—stop calling them that, its—disgusting’ Miguel hissed.

‘Hmm. No. That is how I call them, so, I will continue. But, as I was saying, I don’t believe you love them. Not like I do. But you… reek of loneliness. It is, unnerving. And you pursue them, and me, with something that would imply jealousy, and yet I cannot believe it is them you desire. So, what is it?’

Miguel narrowed his eyes. ‘Hmf. You want the truth?’

Mig nodded and watched patiently as Miguel sat up straight.

‘You idiot. No, I don’t love them. You just—cruelly showed me something I’m not allowed to have, throwing it in my face with your lack of regard for their safety, and it—broke me, temporarily. But it doesn’t change anything. We are not supposed to be happy.’

‘How can you know that?’ Mig asked, his head tilted. Miguel scoffed.

‘I don’t know what it is about us, but—every time, I’ve come close to being happy, it’s taken from me. The same is true of you but you just can’t seem to see it. You are chasing someone from a different universe, how will that work? Will they wear the watch forever, until they die? If they take it off their DNA will disintegrate. You can’t have children, you can’t buy a home, you can’t get a normal job, you can’t buy food or water or necessities. How will you care for her if she is sick, or old, or tired? How will you give her anything but this? You are dangerous. You have blood on your hands, as all O’Hara’s do.’

Miguel sighed and ran both hands down his face as he drolly listed all their issues upfront. ‘Even love wouldn’t be enough to just, paint over those issues, and I know you’re not in deep enough too—’

‘I… think, I do love them, actually’ Mig blurted.

When Miguel turned, he found that his counterpart had softened. His eyes were sad, round, downturned. He looked, scared?

‘I think, I am in love with them’ he repeated.

Miguel scoffed openly to his face. ‘You idiot—no you don’t.’

‘I do.’

‘You don’t know what love is—’

‘I do. I’ve been in love. You know I have.’

Miguel grunted and lowered his head into his hands. It looked like he was in pain.

‘Don’t. Don’t you dare invoke Dana right now.’

‘Dana didn’t love us’ Mig said. There wasn’t a shred of hesitation in those sad little words. ‘Me, or you. You know that.’

To his surprise, Miguel didn’t fight back.

‘She may have liked what we were, but… we were young. It feels like another lifetime now. But she left you, and she—’ he choked on the words and forced them down. They both knew what he meant. ‘I forgot what it felt like, to love something, but I feel it now. It’s like… an old tree that shed its leaves, sitting alone, thinking that it has died, only to realize that it was only winter. No matter how long it’s been, it knows what spring is. It remembers the sun. It remembers the buds, and the flowers. It knows them.’

Miguel wanted to roll his eyes, but he didn’t. The poor fool was speaking so honestly. Still, he had to get one cruel remark in.

‘Mm. You love them so much you let me look at them like that?’ Miguel said snidely. Mig remained unaffected.

‘I seem to have lost a lot of my concern around nudity that you all still uphold, out here. I have not seen clothes for over a decade. I do not care who see’s them, only who touches them. Besides, they are… glorious to look at. I could not deny myself the chance to observe them beneath me.’

‘Ay, Dios—be quiet’ Miguel snapped. Mig conceded.

‘But, going back, Dana was the last real instance you had of loving someone, yes?’ Mig asked. He didn’t notice Miguel suddenly stiffening, his whole body tensing up.

‘She was the last real relationship you had, from what you told me. How can you be so sure about it not working? Even if not romantic love, what if you tried—’

‘I had a family’ Miguel murmured, his eyes growing glassy and dull. Mig froze. He sensed something in the air, something potent. Something deep, and dark, and cold. A white void. A nothingness that he didn’t know how to fill.

For just a moment, all the birds in the air seemed to stop singing. The world went utterly still.

‘You, did? When?’ Mig murmured. It felt strange, like he was speaking in a graveyard, instinctively knowing to lower his voice.

‘Not that long ago. I had a daughter. Now it’s—she’s, gone. Because of me. It was all my fault.’

Mig felt his whole body sink. Despite his animosity with this man, he knew their shared desires. He knew how ingrained into them this one dream was, this thing he’d also been forced to put aside. He could almost feel, in the universal string between their bodies, the pain he had pushed down.

‘Miguel—’

‘I was being kind before, to you, even if you didn’t see it’ Miguel snapped at Mig, interrupting him sharply. ‘I was being kind to both of you. I just wanted you to avoid that same fate, that same pain, but it seems that all O’Hara’s must suffer to learn. So I don’t care anymore. Tear each other apart.’

Mig tapped his foot sadly.

‘It—I mean, having two poor experiences does not a doomed man make’ he murmured. ‘It’s not the end.’

‘Nobody can love us’ Miguel repeated. ‘Nobody lov—’

Nobody has loved me, he thought, nobody but Gabi, but he couldn’t bring himself to verbalize it. For all his grandiose promises that he maintained separation for the sake of others, in truth, he knew he was just weak. He was scared.

He didn’t say this, but Mig could almost feel it in the air around him. This verbose, unspoken resentment.

‘You are far more human than me’ Mig murmured, ‘and I am—treated kindly, if not loved. I don’t see why the same couldn’t happen for you.’

‘We are monsters’ Miguel said. ‘We are still broken. Still ruined.’

Silence fell on the two men as they sat side by side, both facing out into the woods. There was too much here to easily unpick. Too much lingering animosity, too much history, too much jealousy, too much of the same man’s lingering doubt now doubled.

Miguel was slipping somewhere dark, and it wasn’t Mig’s job to save him, but it was hard to watch himself floundering. How could he not, on some level, have sympathy for himself?

‘You… If you wanted, you could watch again’ Mig said, fully misreading the tension in the air as he tried to find a solution. ‘Perhaps seeing it more would help you, acclimatize? To see that this body can be loved? Perhaps—’

‘Get away from me’ Miguel hissed.

Mig slowly closed his mouth. Miguel didn’t want to be reached right now, clearly, and so Mig rose to his feet to leave. He went to the spring and collected as much water as he could in an old wooden basin he’d built, one that could just about fit your body. As he made his way back up to the nest, Miguel raised his hand to stop him.

‘They requested that you be allowed to join the society. Your, little spider’ Miguel said. Mig blanched.

‘They—they did?’ he stammered.

‘Yes. The idiot thinks you could re-join society somehow. They're holding my past escapades over my head to get it, so I agreed. I hope you make the right choice and reject my offer.’

Mig blinked and turned to gaze at nothing, his hands awkwardly juggling the basin. In the end he refused to give a clear answer and climbed back into the nest in silence.

As he closed the door at his back you were already awake to greet him.

‘Hey! Miggy, there you are. You took ages, I thought you like—tripped and fell into the spring, I was about to call emergency services.’ You babbled a little as you rushed across the nest to hug him, your arms burying themselves into his fluff. Mig felt all of his tension melt away.

‘Mi tesoro, back to bed! You’ll catch cold’ he said gently. He wanted to lift you but his hands were full with the basin, and we forced to gently scoop you with one of his spider legs instead. He carried your huffing body back to the mattress and dropped it into the sheets.

‘Hey! I’m fine, come on.’

‘Relax, mi arañita. Let me work. Be still for me.’

You made a show of rolling your eyes before gently nestling back into the sheets, allowing Miguel to prep your bath.

It was a low tech venture, with Mig boiling water over the fire to a warm but not scalding temperature before pouring it into the basin bit by bit. It took so long that you almost drifted off again, but Mig was there to shake you awake at the shoulder and tenderly carry your naked body to the bath.

He sank you into it slowly, his eyes darting to check that you weren’t too hot. When the only sound you made was a soft, pleasured sigh he gleefully let you fully submerge.

‘Oh that’s so much better’ you whined. ‘That’s so, so much better.’

Mig folded his spider legs and settled on the rim of the tub, his chin resting on his arms. He watched you with those big, round eyes, unashamed of how they roamed over the contours of your body beneath the water.

‘Sweet thing’ he whispered, lightly tracing his finger through the water. You watched the ripples hit your chest, the steam obscuring your vision. ‘Sweet, pretty little thing.’

It was quiet here, isolated and alone. There was no sound but the drops of rain on the windowsill, and somewhere far away the distant bellowing of an elk in the mist. You listened to Miguel’s breathing, the rustling of his fur, and the soft movement of the water as it lapped at your skin.

‘So… mm.’ You shuffled and settled into the warmth, letting it seep into your bones.

‘That—other you, he’s still outside, isn’t he?’

Miguel averted his eyes. ‘Ah… yes. He is. I meant to say, mi tesoro, about last night—’

‘I’m fine. Don’t worry.’ You opened one eye to catch his gaze, meeting him with a relaxed and foolhardy expression. ‘I know what we did was—childish, maybe, but he had it coming. I don’t regret it.’

‘Ah…. Ah, good. Good’ Miguel repeated, trying to stifle his relief.

‘Do you regret it?’

‘No. I don’t think so. The man needed a little, territorial display to put him back in his place. He forgets that he’s a spider too. Though… I do, feel some sympathy for the man.’

You scoffed. ‘Pft. Why?’

‘He is sad, mi arañita, you must see that. He is alone. He believes he MUST be alone.’

‘That’s not my fault, nor my problem.’

‘Mm. What if—well, have you considered, what you’ll do if he continues this, surveillance scheme?’ Miguel asked.

Your devilish grin took him quite by surprise. ‘We just keep fucking, I guess, until he learns his lesson. See which position disturbs him the most. I think me on top would do it.’

Mig flushed, trying hard to hide how aroused he was by those words. He was possessive, and ultimately rough when it came to sex, but his body was primed to swoon over a strong, confident figure. It aroused him greatly, even more so when he thought about pinning and subduing that spirit on the end of his cock. He coughed to cover up his obvious lust.

‘Very well, I am- of course happy to follow what you desire, mi tesoro. Ah—I did want to also say, Miguel, he—mentioned that you bargained to have me join the society?’

You closed your eyes at that, doing a little shuffle to sink your shoulders beneath the warm water. ‘Yeah, I did. I wanted you to have the option.’

‘You are, very kind, arañita. I just… I haven’t been around people for a long, long time’ Miguel murmured, his voice dipping as he spoke. You could almost taste his anxiety. ‘I don’t know how to… ah—’

‘Socialize?’

‘Yess, yes, that.’

‘You did fine with me’ you noted. You rolled a little in the tub so you could take his hand in yours, and noticed quite quickly the way he returned to gawking at you beneath the water. His eyes were fixed on the wavy reflection of your ass, soft and wet and round beneath the waves. You had to squeeze his hand to draw him back.

‘Babe. Babe. We can do that in a moment. What I was saying is, you did fine with me. You don’t need to please everyone, just—having the chance, the option, I think you deserve it. Okay?’

Mig rustled again at the idea. He was clearly still worried, still unsure. He tried to focus on your hand, your kind eyes, and the courage he’d gained last night. He clung to the idea that, if he did join, he could be around you more often.

After a moment silence he bobbed his head. ‘Okay. Okay, mi tesoro, I will- go with you. I will join.’

You beamed at him, your smile filling out your cheeks.

‘YES! Yes, Miggy, you’re coming with me!’

Overjoyed you rose from the tub and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, your bare chest quickly smooshing into his. His hands instinctively flew to wrap around you in turn, but he froze up at the sensation.

So much of this was new to him, and despite all the aggressive sex you’d engaged with, the simple act of hugging his soft, warm, wet partner, feeling the water glue your bare torso to his chest as it dripped down to his fur, was something fresh and exciting. He felt his cock straining to get hard.

‘Ah—careful, mi tesoro, you—you’ll get cold’ he murmured.

When you pulled back it only made it worse. His clawed hands lingered on your back, his eyes now given the gift of your wet chest in full view. The little droplets sliding from your collarbones to your chest, circling and dripping off your nipples as they grew cold in the air.

He let out a sound like a strangled rabbit. ‘Ah… Ah, ay coño…’ he breathed.

You felt his gaze like a physical touch, and of course it made you weak. You checked your watch; it was still early, you had a little time.

‘Hey, you, uh…’ You leaned in and gently grabbed at the fur on his lower abdomen, pulling him closer. ‘I wanted to try something. Now there’s no, heat, rushing us.’

‘What, uh—would you like, mi arañita?’ Miguel asked. He swallowed so hard you saw his Adam’s apple jolt.

‘I wanna try sucking on you. Properly. Can we do that?’

The joy in his face was unbearably cute. ‘Yes- Yes, yes, absolutely, yes, ah—just a minute—’

He moved to give you a very quick kiss before shifting his body over the tub, with four legs on either side and his abdomen comfortably settled in front of your face. You lay back in the tub and put one hand up to where you knew the slit was. You watched it grow hard, fully emerging to its full erect size, straining and twitching for attention.

Mig let out a hard sigh at the release. He used one hand to grab the ceiling, stabilizing himself with his claws, while the other cupped your head.

‘You ready, arañita?’

You nodded, and with your lips parted you moved in and took him into your mouth. His groan was loud enough to echo, easily reaching the seething Miguel still sat outside. The man felt his whole body go rigid.

He needed to leave, he thought. He had to go. But… could he, hear you moaning too?

‘Mig’ you groaned. ‘My Mig.’

‘Ah—ahh, that’s it, ‘s so… so good…’

Mig whined as you started experimenting. It was quite the fit for your mouth, so at first you tried just licking. You lapped at the tip, tasting those soft beads of pre-cum as they beaded and dripped. They were still sweet. You moved it down, gently stroking each vein, each inch with your lips and tongue. You’d kiss it, gently, just to see it pulse and twitch.

Your tongue was so flat, so warm and wet. He felt all eight of his legs shaking.

Once he was utterly saturated with your spit, you moved back to sucking on him. Your lips took that full, thick shaft and slipped it between them, and even though you had to widen your jaw as far as it could go you moaned the second it hit your throat.

It felt unbearably good, to suck on him back and forth with his claws in your hair and his beautiful face desperately panting above you. It was both so powerful and so submissive at the same time, so vulnerable while giving you absolute control.

You let him fill your mouth and throb on your tongue, pulsing desperately for release. You started to moan.

With shaky movements Miguel moved one of his longer spider legs into the tub, gently lowering it to shift between your legs. You squeaked as you felt it sliding up and against your cunt.

‘Shh, it’s okay. Let me touch you, arañita. Let me touch you.’

You whimpered as he tightened his grip on your hair, slowly starting to pulse himself between your lips. He began to tenderly fuck your mouth while his spider paw massaged your clit. The fluff was on that swollen nub, gently circling and stimulating every nerve it could, but then you got something more; one of his claws began to gently insert its smooth side inside your cunt.

You squeaked, momentarily frightened, but the danger seemed to spur you into a state of overwhelming, mind-numbing lust. You let it happen. Your eyes rolled, and as Mig groaned out loud you let him claw-fuck you beneath the water.

It was messy.

Water overflowed and splashed down onto the nest, Miguel’s abdomen began to shake and tremble with pleasure. Your body was jolting violently as you edged yourself, torn between the pleasure of that smooth, hard claw rubbing up against your velvety cunt and the paw stimulating your clit.

‘F-Fuck—good arañita, that’s it—you feel, amazing, ah—you are, amazing—’

You grunted as he started to pump deeper into your throat. You could feel his copious pre-cum spurting all over your mouth, coating your tongue until it was all you could taste. He fucked you until spit began to pool and dribble down his shaft and into the water.

‘Mmf—mmf—’

‘You like how I taste, arañita, huh? You like that?’ Mig begged. You tried to nod but you were utterly impaled, your body shaking from overstimulation.

‘You want that, arañita? You want me to cum in your mouth?’

‘Mmf—’

You continued like this for as long as you could, furiously, pawing and sucking at each other in a daydream haze of pleasure.

And outside, on the grass below, Miguel shamefully continued to pleasure himself for the second time. With his hand on his mouth and his thumb and forefinger teasing the tip of his cock, he listened in, and he pretended those muffled moans were his.

He couldn’t leave. Not yet.

Not yet. Link to next part!

#miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara fanfiction #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara x you #drider #spider man 2099 #smut #arachnophilia #smut with plot #miguel o'hara smut #drider miguel o'hara #+18

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necromelli · 4 months

Text

Cherry Wine

[ next part ]

you meet your soulmate every night in your dreams, and tonight is no different. you just wish you knew his name is all.

tw: emotional cheating (maybe?), talk of abusive relationships (nothing descriptive, just mention), allusions to prostitution (I don't think it's outright stated?), mention of drowning, let me know if I missed something!

wc: 2.1k

a/n: i may or may not do another part depending on if people like this. idk it was really cathartic to write + i kinda wanna expand on reader's background + writing them meet

This was the only time you could ever meet. When the waves crashed over a dark beach, angry and relentless. Not even the moon existed in this place — nothing but skies as dark as the water stretched on forever. Even still, you looked forward to it every night. Sitting on the beach with him as the waves continued raging, until they eventually overtook you and you woke up gasping.

He insisted the beach never looked this dark. That it was never this terrifying. That it didn't continue to rise until it tried to drown you. He promised that one day, when you finally meet, he’d show you how lovely the beach truly was. How bright and warm the sun was, how cool and gentle the waves were when they lapped at your ankles. You didn't think you'd care what the beach looked like as long as he was there. If it was important enough to him to somehow make it through both of the clouded grays tormenting your minds, it was important to you too.

As long as it was him and not her. As long as it was the boy who’d hold your hand, who'd rub his thumb across your knuckles mindlessly, who’d try to comfort you and make you forget about your home life. On those nights, when he seemed able to calm you down, the ocean remained calmer for a longer time. On those nights, you half believed his promise of the beach being kind.

Even now, he looked so at peace standing by the rushing water. There wasn't an ounce of fear tensing his wide shoulders. Despite all his problems — at least the ones he confided in you — he still looked happy. When he saw the outline of your figure, a wide smile split across his face. He always beamed when he saw you — as bright as the sun, as pretty as the stars, as delphic as the moon.

“Hey, sweetheart.” His voice barely carried to your lonely spot on the beach. He started towards you, his smile never faltering. You followed suit, as fast as you could in the wet sand. “You look as pretty as ever.”

You knew he was messing with you. You were covered by your silk nightgown, arms crossed on your chest tight, trying to ignore the wind that nipped your skin. Still, though, you returned his smile with one of your own. “You look warm.” You answered back, laughing softly. “Be honest — is that real fur?”

For a moment, he was confused, as if he had forgotten all about the fact he was dressed to the nines. Looking down, he remembered. He wasn't at home and he didn't have the energy to change. He was quickly shrugging the coat off and draping it across your shoulders. “No. No, it's faux. In fact, if you look right here,” He stood behind you, lifting the arm of the coat closer to your eyes. “You’ll see how the fibers melted together.”

You wanted to look down at the sleeve, but you were distracted by the way his chest pressed against your back, how his arms slipped underneath your arms and wrapped around to your front, how his slow breaths were warm against your skin. You didn't think you’d be cold anymore, with or without the fur coat.

“How did they melt?” You asked curiously, your fingers clutching the open sides of the coat closer to your body. It smelled like honey and strawberries, it smelled like him. It washed over you, erasing the smell of cherries and wine. It made you forget.

“Well,” Finnick hummed, his chin coming down to rest on your shoulder. You were sure his eyes were closed softly, intent on listening to you breathe and the sound of the ocean. “Would you believe me if I said I couldn't tell you?”

You pushed the disappointment that buried deep in your chest, a feeling you were all too familiar with. But, despite the hollowness in your chest, you nodded. You understood better than anyone why some things, even with your soulmate, had to be a secret. “I would. Makes it mysterious,” He laughed, which made you smile. “I can make up all sorts of stories.”

“Oh really?” Your words had caught his attention. You knew because his nose pressed against your neck. You knew because you could feel the smirk form. “Like what, darling?”

You didn't respond. Instead, you looked at the ocean, which had since calmed into a low roar. His large hands splayed across your stomach, pressing into your ribs as he tried to warm them between the silk of your nightgown and fur of his coat.

You wished you could have known his name or the district he lived in, but that wasn't allowed. Anytime you tried, the ocean screamed or washed away the letters in the sand before they were even formed. Or the sky darkened so much you couldn't see your own hands, most certainly not each other's lips.

“Mm. I don't know.” You responded quietly as your own hands slipped through the arms of his coat and wrapped around your waist. You held him closer with the excuse of trying to warm his hands up. “If I told you, it would ruin the mystery of it.”

“That's true, love.” He pressed a warm kiss against your neck. It filled you with so much warmth you thought you’d combust into a million stars. “I look forward to this every night. I'm sorry I couldn't make it last night.”

His apology threatened to split your heart in half. There was no reason to apologize in your eyes. Sure, the hollow disappointment that filled your aching chest when he didn't arrive hurt, but it wasn't his fault. You knew that something needed his attention more than you. “It's okay,” you promised. “I’m not mad.”

“I know,” Finnick mused softly. He pressed another warm kiss against your neck, your bodies swaying together. “But, you still deserve the apology.”

You swallowed thickly, forcing the lump growing in your throat back down. As if the ocean reflected your emotions, the waves started crashing against the beach in larger pulls, nipping your toes with icy cold water. He was everything you wished she was. Even after everything, an apology never slipped past her lips. Not that it would've made a difference anyways, because her actions never matched.

Not wanting to lose you just yet, he hummed once again. His fingers found yours and interlocked them. As if on instinct, his thumbs brushed across your knuckles tenderly. “How’s your wife?” He asked, but not really caring in the slightest. He wanted to find everything about you out, about your life, so that he might be able to find you and whisk you away.

You took a moment to respond, not trusting your voice. “She’s fine.” You felt him squeeze your hand, encouraging you to continue. “She’s, well, she’s stressed. She won't tell me why, though, so I can only help in limited ways.”

“Limited ways?” He questioned you, knowing better than the sweet way you put it. It wasn't fair the way she had the audacity to turn your skin cherry red. If he could have fixed it, he would have. You’d never have to worry about her again.

“It helps.” You insisted, eyes burning. Humiliation clawed your throat. Part of you wished you had never told him, but then, he wouldn't be able to comfort you. To be the one thing saving you. “She doesn't mean it. The anger just takes her over and overwhelms her.”

“Still not a reason to hurt you.” He reminded, and you could tell he was on edge. His fingers tightened their hold, holding you closer to his chest. “What was it this time?”

You pursed your lips as you debated whether or not to tell him. You decided against it. “Would you believe me if I said I couldn't tell you?”

He sighed softly against your neck and picked his head up to kiss your temple. “I would.” A beat passed before he continued. “But, I wish I knew so I could kiss it better.”

Your head dipped as you smiled softly, swallowing the laughing sob that swelled in your throat. You knew he was entirely serious, that if you told him all the broken parts of you, he would spend all the time he had fixing it. It was tempting to tell him, so that he could kiss it better, but there wasn't enough time in the world for him to do that. Not with the ocean at your ankles now.

“How was work?” You asked, gently trying to change the subject. You didn't want to think about her. Not when he was here, holding you closely. In this dreamscape, where you got to be with your soulmate, nothing else mattered.

It was you, your soulmate, and the ocean.

It was his turn to contemplate whether or not he told you. A heavy sigh escaped through his nose, his hands guiding yours over your stomach. He squeezed you close, as if just having you there made it easier. It probably did.

“Stressful.” he admitted, debating how much he should truly tell you. “Last night was hard. Tonight was even harder.”

Your head fell back against his shoulder, turning inwards so you could kiss his neck. His breath caught in his throat, the longing of truly holding you threatening to suffocate him. You felt the water crash against your knees and pretended to ignore it.

“I’m sorry, love.” You whispered, and he knew you felt it deep in your bones with how tight your voice sounded. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

His initial answer was almost no, but he decided to offer something. “Just tired of people thinking pretty jewels and expensive gifts make what they do acceptable.”

The fur coat grew heavy on your shoulders as you realized it was one of his gifts. He would have never worn something so gaudy. Part of you wished you realized the moment he put it on you, so that you could've dropped it into the ocean and watched it disappear from the dreamscape altogether, forever.

“Or fancy baths that smell like mulled wine,” You offered in addition. You felt him smile despite the dark narrative. At least you had that in common; the way those in your life refused to see you as human.

“I much prefer my baths with flowers.” He laughed, kissing your cheek. “Sea thrift, to be exact.”

The water at your thighs didn't bother you. Not with him behind you, holding you tightly. Not with him kissing your cheek — careful not to brush against your lips. You wanted nothing more than to kiss him fully, but he insisted on waiting until he saw you in person. Until the moment you saw each other awake, you’d have to make do with this. But, he made up for it all with his doting and warm affection.

“Sea thrift?”

“Sea thrift.” He nodded, instinctively holding you closer to him. His fingers squeezed yours so tightly it hurt, but you didn't stop him. “Armeria Maritima. With as many books as your wife has, I'm sure there's one about them.”

You raised a brow, giggling. The sound made his chest swell with warmth. He loved you so much he was sure it would kill him one day. “Are you giving me homework?”

“Something to remind you of me tomorrow.” He answered — more so corrected. He would have loved to sit on the beach with you, card his fingers through your hair, and watch the waves, but tonight wasn't the night.

Usually, you got to spend almost all night together, only being torn apart when it was time to wake, but not tonight. Not with him away from home. Late to bed and early to rise. Your favorite moment was when you got to lay together, your head on his chest, half asleep with the buzz of the waves.

You were sure the beach could be a kind place. Full of kind, warm waters and sands. Even without ever visiting a real beach, it was your happy spot. All because of him. He pulled you out of your thoughts.

“I expect you to be able to tell me all about them.”

You turned around in his arms and buried your face in his chest. Her fingers gripped his white shirt, as his own slipped beneath the fur coat and clutched your silk nightgown. He didn't want to wake up. Not yet. It felt like he had just fallen asleep, and it truly wasn't fair that it wasn't your pretty face he got to wake up to.

��I love you, sugar.” He whispered and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

You struggled to keep your head above water, but still found the voice to whisper back. “I love you, too.”

#the hunger games #catching fire #finnick odair #mockingjay #thg fanfiction #thg finnick #finnick x reader #finnick x you #fanfic #thg series #thg #finnick imagine #finnick odair x reader #finnick odair imagine #finnick odair headcanons

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moonit3 · 14 days

Note

yandere x fem reader whos super chill about being kidnapped. it goes a little something like

"im sorry, you wont get to see your friends or family ever again, all you need is me"

"...kay. you got any snacks down here?"

a chill reader? damn, i wish i could be like that…

ᯓᡣ𐭩 yanderes with a chill! reader

➽ context warnings: yandere themes (of course), past kidnapping, mentioned manipulation, gn! reader, female clothing in adeline part, rope (but not much).

➽ word count: around 680.

➽ synopsis: after realizing you won’t escape, the yandere seems happier with it.

➽ yandere! multi x reader

➽ a/n: so you haven’t specified which yandere you would like me to write, so i picked three: max, leonard and adeline as i wasn’t in the mood to create a whole new character for this one. also shoutout to @.cafekitsune for the amazing heart divider used in this post! enjoy the headcanons my dear readers! an even isn’t speak out loud, the reader is gn! in max part, m! in leonard and f! in adeline part.

MAX

➽ the walls are too thin at his place and his failed attempt to wrap your limbs to the headboard made him think that you are going to leave soon, especially after he almost forget to close the door before leaving to work. max knows he is a lost cause in trying making to stay at his apartment without escaping, but the important part is that he is trying his best.

➽ so imagine his face when he came back home to see you sitting at the couch watching some movie. he almost passed out right there, it was like he saw a ghost instead of you. he could only stutter when trying (and failing) to reprimand you into submission and when max realized that he couldn’t do much about it, he just sat next to you to watch the rest of the movie.

➽ initially, he felt like a disappointment when seeing that you easily got off from the many ropes and chains that he placed you on the bed (maybe he shouldn’t have skipped the knot class when he was a scout). however, he is extremely happy that you haven’t left him when you could easily have done when he was away.

➽ knowing that you won’t leave him, max asked if you would like to continue with your college education as long you move to his place. of course, you accepted it and a big smile grown so big at his lips. he is so happy with the love of his live living with him and he can’t wait to show you off to everyone at college.

LEONARD

➽ the security system that he has at his manor is deadly. cameras all over the place to watch you, motion sensors to catch the slightest movement of you and the highest walls around the property to prevent you from leave. leonard wasn’t playing around when making all those security measures to keep you inside, even hiring guards to stay at the entrance as an extra protection.

➽ he knows that you don’t have any chance to escape from him, leonard would torment you if you dare to voice your concerns about it. instead, you appear as you don’t care about being trapped inside his manor. in matter of fact, you are enjoying your time inside.

➽ taking long bath full of bubbles at the jacuzzi in the main suite, eating the unique meal made by his personal chefs and even requesting if he can afford your old hobbies now that you have time to do anything. and of course he can’t deny your wishes.

➽ gifting you the best supplies to help you with that hobby of yours in exchange that he will join you. leonard is wants to learn more about you and spending time doing something that you enjoy is a bonus to him.

ADELINE

➽ she dreamed of seeing you acting so sweetly and so relaxed after being taken away of society, but adeline never expected to see it happening in real life. so she becomes suspicious when you show no sign of reluctance nor fear when she tells you won’t leave her place anytime soon.

➽ now that you live under her roof, adeline makes sure to make sure to everyone who either works there or visit her that you belong to her only. now you only get to wear those dresses made of silk when someone comes over to discuss business with adeline and she always makes you wear those that have a split on the side. alternatively, if you prefer wearing pants over dresses, then she makes you silk pants and long sleeve shirt that often match her dresses always.

➽ and when there is no one around, she makes you wear the most expensive set of lingeries that she buys for you or the most comfortable nightgowns depending on your preferences. either way, adeline will make you pose for a few photos to her personal collection. one that contains pictures of you dating back to months prior you have known her…

@moonit3 writings

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writerpetals · 1 year

Text

artificial heart | 🔞

; optional male lead smut | ☁️

w: android!au

“He’s… a lot taller than I imagined.”

Your heart drums so hard in your chest the thumping reaches your ears as you stare at the machine before you. He's nothing like you imagined after being told you would be receiving an artificially intelligent assistant to handle your schedules, setting up meetings, endorsements, and interviews. You imagined something more… robotic, but the man that stands before you looks like nothing more than human, and you would believe him to be just that if it weren’t for the amount of money you spent on him.

“Yes, well, don’t be intimidated by his size,” Mr. Park, the owner of the company you purchased your new android assistant from, begins to tell you as he circles the robot, hands behind his back and a proud smile on his aged face. “He was made specifically for you to do whatever you wish as well as protect you and keep your best interest in mind. You’re an actress, yes?”

You can only blink as you stare at the android, taking in his soft expression, his eyes, hair pushed back and styled neatly to make a good first impression. Gulping, your eyes scan his jawline, down to his shoulders covered in the soft, silk dress shirt, tie, and suit jacket he adorns. He looks perfect. Too good to be true, if you’re being honest.

“Uh, yes. Yes sir, I am.”

Part of you wants to believe it’s not real, but the dent in your bank account and the fact that the perfect assistant (as promised by Mr. Park) is standing before you forces you to understand it’s real, and he was made just for you.

“This android here is capable of handling important meetings, setting up interviews, and booking endorsements. He knows thousands of recipes and can plan a proper diet if that’s what you wish, as well as different exercise routines programmed into his memory if you need them.” Mr. Park stops circling the android to stand at his side, patting him on the shoulder. The android flashes a soft smile that would be comforting to anyone that wasn’t aware of what he was. To you, it puts you on edge, wondering where is the flaw. How can he appear so perfect? “He can act like a bodyguard, designed to read situations and do what is in your best interest. He is also… a companion of different sorts.”

“What do you mean?” You step closer, furrowing your brow as you look between the two. “I thought he was only an assistant.”

“Well, yes. His first purpose is the protection of his companion, which is you.” Mr. Park offers a smile before your gaze shifts to your new android assistant, and he stares at you with his eyes shifting to white. Only for a moment do they flash bright, as if he’s trying to read the current situation to understand how you feel about him. “Second are the tasks you told us you wished him to complete when we were making the offer. Third is… a more personal relationship. Intimate, if you so wish.”

“That won’t be necessary,” you immediately object with a shake of your head, watching his eyes simmer back to the regular hue you were getting used to. “I just need a new assistant. Nothing more than that.”

“Very well.” Mr. Park claps his hands together and smiles wide. “I hope he is a good fit, but if you have problems or concerns don’t be afraid to get in contact with me. We took extra care in making him just for you, so we want to make sure it works out well for everyone.”

“Thank you so much, Mr. Park.” You take his extended hand for a shake, smiling politely before turning back to him. He never took his eyes off of you, the same soft smile on his lips as he stands before you. You can’t calm your racing heart or the way your stomach does backflips. “I hope it works as well.”

***

“You have a lovely home, Miss.”

He looks around the room to study his surroundings as he enters your condo, two bags of luggage in hand and a smile on his lips that begins to put you at ease. On the ride home, he offered to drive, surprising you that he could drive, but you declined, telling him you already had a car waiting on the two of you. It gave you time to get to know him a little better, though you weren’t sure if there was anything to know considering he is a brand new android.

Still, you tried your best to ease the tension between the two of you, even if you were the only one feeling uneasy and awkward. You asked him a few questions you don’t remember the answer to due to only being able to concentrate on the deepness of his voice. It surprised you the first time he spoke your name, figuring it was probably already registered in his program before you even met.

It has you curious of what else he knows about you, but you assume you will figure it all out in due time. For now, you need to adjust to having an android as an assistant while allowing him to adjust to living somewhere new and handling all the tasks you have for him.

“Thanks. It’s a little too big for just me,” you tell him as you guide him to the hall on the right to show him where he will be sleeping, “but maybe with you here now it won’t feel so lonely.”

“Well, my purpose is to do as you wish, whether it be handling your schedules or keeping you company.” When you enter the spare bedroom, he sets his bags down as a grin crosses his lips, causing your heart to skip a beat. “Whatever you need, I will do it.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” you tell him, hoping he can’t sense the way your voice wavers a bit from just his presence alone. Mr. Park assured you there’s no need to be intimidated, but with your heels off now, he looks much bigger than he did back at the company you purchased him from. He towers over you, causing you to wonder if you could have chosen a smaller height for your new assistant as well. “I’ll let you unpack your things and get settled in. If there’s anything you need, just let me know, okay?”

“Miss?” he calls for you as you begin to step out of the bedroom. “My task?”

“Huh?” You blink.

“What task would you like me to handle first?” He takes a step closer, folding his hands behind his back and you can’t miss the broadness of his chest as he does so.

“Well, I guess I haven’t thought that far ahead,” you tell him honestly as he chuckles just as a human would. Interesting, you think, wondering if his reactions are based on the fact that he wants to make you comfortable, or if he truly has a mind of his own and thinks of your remark as humorous. “For now, just settle in. Then we can go over my schedule and I can give you all the important information.”

“No need, Miss.” He waves his hand to dismiss any worries. “Your schedules for the next month have already been programmed in my memory, as well as contact information, important business numbers, and a meeting with your agent next Saturday.”

“Oh!” You perk up, smiling at the news though you are surprised he already has everything figured out. “Then I guess you can just make yourself at home.”

“Of course,” he says with a nod of his and his lips pressed in a thin line. Then his expression falls, as if he’s just remembered something. “Dinner is soon. Would you like me to prepare you a meal?”

You realize he’s going to do anything but take it easy for his first night. Of course, that is what he is programmed to do and you decide there’s no use fighting it.

“Sure,” you tell him with a sigh, “I would like that. Thank you.”

He smiles and nods his head. “My pleasure.”

***

“Dinner is ready, Miss.”

He finds you in your apartment’s office an hour and a half later, his voice pulling you from the script you have been reading over to prepare for your next role in a few months. With a smile, you nod before following him toward the dining room that rests between the living room and spacious kitchen.

“I prepared a meal with the ingredients you already had,” he informs you, sliding out a lush dining chair for you to settle in. Laid out on the glass table is a plate of what appears to be chicken parmesan with a glass of red wine. The smell of the sauce hits your nose in an instant, steam rising from the plate and your stomach growls at the sight. You weren’t even aware you were so hungry, though most of your days lately have been spent diving into your work and not caring too much about meals, or anything else. You aren’t in a position to allow your mind to wander. Suddenly you’re thankful he is there to take care of things for you.

You imagine your last assistant went shopping just before being released if there were enough ingredients to make such a meal. Though it hasn’t been long since your old assistant has been gone, it feels as if it was forever ago since she was the one buying your food and tending to your schedules. She didn’t cook, however, so it’s a surprise he can offer such a service to you.

“Is everything okay?” He pulls your attention from your thoughts of how things used to be. You glance up to see him eagerly awaiting your approval, so you smile at him with a nod of your head.

“Looks great. Thank you.”

“Of course, Miss.” He offers a gentle smile, just as any human would, and it catches you off guard for a moment. Of course, he was designed and programmed perfectly. He was made with you in mind and so everything he does is what is best for you. You didn’t expect to nearly forget he wasn’t human in moments like this, when he chuckles or smiles or reacts in such a way. “Is there anything else you need?”

Then his programmed responses remind you quickly. You think for a moment, then decide to offer him a seat next to you.

“Would you like to join me?” He blinks for a moment, surprised at the question. You chuckle as you grab your fork from its resting place on a folded cloth. “I know you can’t eat, obviously. But… would you keep me company?”

His expression softens before his smile returns. “Of course.”

He slides into the seat opposite of you, his back straight and his hands folded in his lap. Now he looks more robotic than human, and you realize it’s going to take some getting used to. Though you remember Mr. Park telling you he will adjust even further the longer he is around real people. Maybe he needs time to pick up on little quirks and gestures of humans just to seem more real.

“I hope I am not out of line by asking,” he begins just as you take the first bite and nearly melt from the tastes bursting into your mouth, “what happened with your old assistant?”

In an instant, you stop chewing, not expecting to be confronted with such a question so soon. You knew the reason for your old assistant leaving would arise eventually, however. Even if you just met him today, you want to be open and honest with him due to you expecting as much in return.

“I hope I didn’t offend you, Miss,” he begins again when you don’t offer a reply, lost in a whirlwind of your own thoughts once again. “It’s just with the short timeframe I was made, it would seem there was an urgency for my assistance.”

“You’re aware of that?” A crease in your brow forms as you ask. You wouldn’t have guessed him to pick up on his creation process, but he is right in the fact that it was a quick one. You even paid extra to receive him quicker than most.

“I am aware of how I was made and the reason, yes.” He nods his head gently with a slight grin.

“Oh, well…” For a moment you bite your lip, trying to get your thoughts in order. “I just needed a new assistant that would be focused and loyal. The old one didn’t work out.” You manage to get the jist of the reason out without too many details, and he nods in understanding.

“I hope things work out for you this time,” he says as you take another bite of your food, relishing in the taste and deciding if you get meals like this every night, you hope so as well. “My focus is one hundred percent on you.”

You don’t want to acknowledge the way your heart flutters at his words, but you can’t deny it, either. You gulp down the bite in your mouth and force an awkward smile before taking a sip of your wine.

***

“Do you sleep?”

After dinner, he left you to your script while you left him to clean up. The two of you made small talk while you ate the rest of your meal, telling him about what you do as an actress and he listened with honest interest. You weren’t sure of too many questions to ask him since, well, he wasn’t made too long ago, but you left him with the hope of getting to at least feel as if you know him better.

A little time passed and you grew too tired trying to memorize your lines. You began to get ready for sleep, doing your usual routine of taking off your make-up, cleaning your face, brushing your teeth and it wasn’t until you went to get undressed that you remembered to check on him. You found him tidying up things here and there, taking care of what he could manage until you pointed out something for him to do. He followed you to your bedroom, lingering by the door while you grabbed your night clothes out of a white, wooden chest on the other side of the room.

He smiles at the question you asked, as if it was almost silly of you to ask it. “I rest,” he tells you politely. He always responds in a calm manner, his voice soothing to your ears and though you don’t know him well at all, it makes you feel relaxed around him. “Until you have another task for me.”

You bite your lip while tossing the clothes you wish to change into over the silk sheets of your bed. “I have a few errands to run in the morning. Need to actually buy food instead of ordering take out every night.” Especially if he is cooking, you think to yourself. He smiles at your remark, as if he knows what you’re thinking. “I have to train for my next role as well. It’s an outdoorsy adventure type hiking through trails, so lots of cardio is needed.”

You chuckle as he nods and smiles. “What time would you like me to wake you?”

You hum, wondering why the thought of a personal android alarm clock excites you in the moment. “Seven?”

“I’ll see you as seven, Miss.”

He offers one last smile, reaching for the door handle, and shuts it behind him. You’re left wondering how you will manage to actually fall asleep with someone new in your home, but you were promised by Mr. Park he is harmless. You don’t doubt it with how you feel so comfortable around him, if only a bit curious and intrigued. Still, having such a drastic change so suddenly does make it more difficult to drift off to sleep. Eventually you manage with the thought of being woken up early by him in the morning.

***

He knocks softly on your bedroom door right on schedule. You blink a few times to adjust to the light spilling through the windows before stirring beneath the covers.

Five more minutes, you want to tell him, having had a harder time falling asleep the night before than you would have liked. With your mind spinning from thoughts of your new assistant, to your old one, to trying to adjust to life as it is now, you can’t really be blamed.

You also can’t stay in bed, you realize, as he knocks again and informs you it’s seven a.m. You assume you take too long to get out of bed or even answer him when you hear the twist of a handle before the door slowly opens.

“Miss? Are you awake?” You hear his voice without seeing him, assuming he’s respecting your privacy while keeping your task of being your personal android alarm clock in mind.

“Mm… unfortunately…” You never were a morning person, but you can blame long schedules, weird filming hours, and jet lag for that. Still, you try not to make the impression of a grumpy, diva actress as you clear your throat and slip out of bed. “Sorry. Yes, I’m awake.” You rub your eyes and blink a few times while finally adjusting to the morning sun.

“Is it alright if I step in?” he asks, and you’re thankful of it. You wore warm, silky pajamas to sleep the night before, looking down at the pink and white pattern on your top and pants, and then shrugging to yourself.

“Sure,” is all you say, then you yawn and stretch your hands over your head. He steps in a second later, back straight, looking poised and proper. You take in his styled hair just the same as the day before, though he’s only wearing a white dress shirt and slacks today. You almost want to laugh to yourself at the image of “waking” from his rest and getting dressed in the morning, finding the thought of him as any other human quite humorous. You’re simply too sleepy to give it another second on your mind, however.

“I have scheduled you a car to drive you to your preferred gym. It should be here in approximately thirty minutes. Would you like me to lay out appropriate attire for you?”

As he talks, you make your way to the bathroom connected to your large master bedroom. Grabbing your toothbrush from the marble countertop, you turn the water on and begin freshening up while giving him a nod of approval. He hangs by the bathroom door, averting his eyes while turning his shoulder to you, but you can hear the polite smile in his voice.

“Great. Would you like me to begin preparing breakfast for you?”

“Mhm,” you hum, mouth full of toothpaste and normally you wouldn’t let anyone see you in such a state, but you’re far too sleepy and your mind is exhausted from running wild the night before.

“Okay. I’ll lay your clothes out on your bed for you,” is all he says before turning away to begin his tasks.

By the time you’ve washed your face and pinned your hair up for your work-out, you can already smell the aroma of bacon seeping from the kitchen and filling the bedroom. Your stomach growls as you look over the gym pants and tank top he laid out for you. A smile springs to your face before you begin getting dressed, realizing that he would do any and everything you asked of him. Part of you feels less like an actress with an assistant and more like a spoiled child, but the sensible part tells you he’s just being thorough and doing his job. After all, he was made just for you to meet any need you could ever have.

***

After a delicious breakfast of bacon, eggs, and toast with a glass of orange juice, he leaves you to head to your work out with a long session of cardio while he stays in your apartment to clean up. You know you should feel at least a little uneasy with a stranger in your home while you aren’t there, human or not, but it comes easier than you imagined to be off on your own while he stays behind. He was made just for you, you keep telling yourself. Mr. Park has never had an unruly android sold to a client, or one that went off the rails as far as you knew. There’s no reason not to trust him.

When your workout is finished, the car he called for you takes you back home, and you arrive just in time to spot him shuffling about and busy in the kitchen. For a moment you watch him, placing new ingredients in the cabinets and putting things away in the fridge and the bottom freezer drawer. When you let him know you’re home by asking where he got the groceries from (already assuming he had them delivered), he surprises you by telling you he went out and got them himself.

He continues to surprise you in the following weeks. He cooks for you for every meal, and you admit you’ve gotten too spoiled too fast with the delicious food he prepares. He even had some of your favorite recipes programmed in him before he went home with you, preparing them with ease each night for dinner. He spends his days cleaning up and tidying when you are busy tucked away memorizing your script. You sometimes smell a few of your favorite aromas that remind you of home with your family when you were younger, realizing he lit a candle just to relax you while you worked. After work outs, he even offers to run you a bath, but you quickly decide that you can definitely manage on your own. Even if he does your laundry and readies your clothes in the morning, which is something no assistant has ever done for you before, you tell yourself there are still a few things you will always handle yourself, never wanting to feel helpless instead of just taken care of.

Not to mention what comes as even more of a surprise is the way he grows on you, and your human characteristics begin to rub off on him. He picks up little quirks and gestures from being around you as well as all the people he comes into contact with while running errands for you. His expressions become more personal, realistic and it’s as if he loosens up a bit in the short time you’ve known him. He still remains proper with his calm tone and he is always professional with you, but he chuckles more and asks questions about your work, your past, and even sometimes the two of you have conversations about what you wish your future would be like.

You grow to enjoy his company more than his help. Even in such a short time, you start to think of him as a friend. You tell him when you’re feeling stressed and the burden of work is too much to bear. He responds with a hot cup of tea and an ear for you to vent. It comes easier than you expected to talk to him. And he listens. Truly listens, hanging on to every word you say and you aren’t sure if it’s because he cares for you (if he can care for someone since he isn’t even human) or if he only wants to pick up on more things. Still, you decide it’s nice to have someone to confide in when you need it.

His gentleness comes in handy the day you spot a vicious headline about yourself in a tabloid magazine. He and you were supposed to be out for the day as a way to take your mind off of work for a while after meetings with your agent and another script being sent in for a guest appearance on a TV show. He suggested it might help to get some fresh air, coming up with the idea to walk down to the coffee shop on the corner to clear your mind. He offered to order you a coffee and a strawberry pasty once you arrived, but you insisted you could manage yourself with a chuckle.

Sometimes, you quickly realized, you just enjoyed his company. So you ordered your drink and food, sat in the corner of the shop after he took your coat from your shoulders, and talked for a while. You admitted it did help ease your mind and on the walk back to your apartment, you were feeling lighter, more at peace.

That was until you spotted the headline on a street newsstand.

UP AND COMING ACTRESS STILL HEARTBROKEN OVER EX-FIANCE RUNNING AWAY WITH HER BEST FRIEND

The words caught you off guard, only because for once after the entire painful ordeal, your mind was the furthest from your pain. Not to mention the picture they chose to include on the front page of the magazine. It was the furthest thing from flattering, a scumbag paparazzi having taken the shot a few weeks prior when you were out at a restaurant with a friend, spilling your heart out to leave cheeks stained with tears, and the entire thing seemed to break your heart all over again.

“Is everything okay, Miss?” He asks when you finally arrive back home. In silence, he took your coat from you as you slipped your boots off at the door. The walk to your place wasn’t much better after seeing the headline. You fought back the tears. You pushed away the anger, but it was mostly due to you being mad at yourself for getting upset in the first place.

Things were getting better, you told yourself as you walked in silence next to him. I was getting better.

“Uh, yeah, I-I’m fine,” is all you tell him, quickly rushing to your office to shut the door behind you. You don’t even move from the spot, knees feeling too weak while your head falls back against the wood panel. Your eyes close, but tears still manage to reach your cheeks. You don’t know if you’re hurting, or just angry, or maybe a mix of both. It only takes something so small to bring all the feelings rushing back. It just takes one stupid little headline to bring that night back to life, where you found out the man you were supposed to marry in only a month was sleeping with your old assistant, your best friend.

Disgust rises in your chest because you thought you were over it. Insecurities and doubts suddenly fill your mind because of course you blame yourself and now it becomes harder to breathe in the moment. The tears continue to fall. You clutch your stomach and slip to the ground, anger bubbling right along with it to have you a mess of confusion and not understanding the sudden overwhelming emotions flooding you.

There’s a knock on the office door a moment later. Of course he would check up on you. It must have been surprising to him for you to suddenly be so cold, so out of it.

“Miss? Are you okay?” His voice is gentle as it comes from the other side of the door. For a moment, you still can’t move, but you take a few deep breaths and try to wipe your eyes. You’re sure your mascara is running, so you give a few extra swipes with the sleeve of your sweater before crawling to your knees.

Another deep breath and you’re on your feet. You pull the door open slowly, coming face to face with your android assistant looking more human than ever. His brow is wrinkled and there’s a deep blue hue in his eyes. For a second you’re taken aback. You’ve never seen his eyes shift to such colors before, blinking once, twice, and again to make sure you’re not imagining it.

“Are you okay?” He steps closer, somehow his voice even softer, more gentle than before. Part of you wants to collapse in his arms, though it wouldn’t be appropriate. His demeanor would make it so easy, so comforting, the perfect shoulder to cry on.

But you try to toughen up and force a smile.

“Yeah, sorry… just… allergies.” The way he stares at you tells you how terrible you are at lying. For an actress that would normally say far more than you would like but who could blame you after having a panic attack.

“Please tell me if something is troubling you.” He steps closer, confirming with words he doesn’t believe the horrible allergy lie. He places two large, gentle hands on your shoulders, thumbs massaging through your sweater. “I’m here to help no matter what it is.”

For a moment you only look up at him. The tears fill your eyes once more, chest aching so much it leaves you nearly breathless. Before a single drop can hit your cheeks burning hot, you crash into his chest, collapsing into his embrace just like you wanted to do. “Oh…”

He says nothing, only wrapping his arms around your body to hold you close. The warmth of his hold engulfs you as you cling tightly to his dress shirt. Tears fall to your cheeks and even soak into the fabric your head rests against, but he doesn’t let you go. He lets you feel how you need to feel, and he keeps you close. His hand begins to stroke your back, calming your cries and your body down from its overwhelming state. You push into him, allowing him to ease the burden, clinging to him to hold onto reality so your mind doesn’t drift too far away.

A minute passes like this, wrapped up in his comforting warmth. Finally the tears stop falling, though your head begins to pound from the pressure. Your cheeks still burn hot and when you pull away from him, you quickly wipe them with the sleeve of your sweater once again.

“I’m… sorry.” You sniffle and look away, never wanting him to see you like this. Never wanting anyone to see you like this, but how can that be when paparazzi takes pictures in your most vulnerable state and sells them to gossip magazines.

“Please, don’t apologize,” he says, placing a gentle hand beneath your chin so you’ll look him in the eyes. There you spot a different hue, a flash of blue and then pink, finally settling on purple. A second or two passes before you realize they nearly had you in a trance, watching the waves of colors. It somehow comforts you in the moment, staring into his gentle eyes, feeling his warmth, his careful touch on your face. “Are you feeling better now?”

You can breathe, so it’s a start. You refrain from telling him that, however. Instead, a weak smile forms on your lips and you nod your head.

“Would you like to talk about it?” The question isn’t pushy and doesn’t pry. You know he would have no need for such things. It comes as a genuine concern for you, wanting to help and make you feel better just as he was designed to do.

All you can do is wrinkle your brow and bite your lip as you keep your tears at bay, nodding your head to tell him yes. Gently, he guides you from your office to your living room to have a seat on the sofa. He sits close to you, without a word reaching to take your hand still trembling from your emotions in his own. Then you take a deep breath, trying to get your thoughts under control.

“I… saw a headline while we were walking home.” You pause, wanting to make sure the ache that was settled deep in your chest didn’t return. Of course, the feeling still lingers but as long as you can form the words, as long as you can breathe and speak without breaking down again, you want to keep going. “It was a stupid, dumb headline on a stupid, dumb magazine and I… I just didn’t expect to see it so suddenly. Not when I wasn’t thinking about it. Now when I… when I thought I was getting over it.”

“What was it about?” He never pulls his eyes away from you. Normally it would make you insecure. Even for an actress sometimes the thought of eyes on you constantly can be frightening, especially when you feel so weak, so vulnerable. As always, he puts you at ease. Everything he does is for you.

“I…” You bite your lip, wanting to tell him, just not knowing where to start. You decide you should start from the beginning. “I had this guy… my… fiance.” The last word releases in a whisper, as if it’s poison on your tongue. It stings in your chest at the thought. The thought of giving your entire life to someone that could crush your heart so easily.

“Oh?” he asks when you take too long of a pause.

“We were all set to be married a month ago. We were supposed to be married now.” The images come flooding back, the memories filling your mind one by one. The thoughts of testing cakes and picking out a wedding dress with your mother and best friend arise and nausea sets in. “A few weeks before the wedding I-” You gulp, hard, swallowing the words because you know if you speak them the voice that comes out will sound nothing like your own.

He gives a little squeeze of your hand, encouraging you to continue. He tells you without words he’s right there for you, whatever you need.

“I found out he was cheating on me.” For some reason, the words are a sudden blow to the chest followed by a weight from your shoulders all at the same time. You haven’t talked to many about your recent heartbreak, though you feel as if the world already knows everything thanks to “close sources” and nosy paparazzi. Though, telling him now feels as if it’s the one thing you needed to begin healing. You aren’t sure if it’s due to finally coming in check with the reality of what happened and how you feel, or if he is somehow so intent on helping you it suddenly makes you feel better about it all. You can’t seem to care either way. You’re thankful to him.

“He was unfaithful to you as a companion.” You chuckle with tears welling in your eyes at him making sense of it.

“That and a whole hell of a lot more.” Before you can wipe the drops that fall against your cheek, he reaches for you. His thumb brushes ever so lightly against your skin, ridding you of the tears and soothing you. “The person he decided to cheat on me with was also my old assistant. My… best friend.”

The words sting just as much as the first time you found out. Not only did you have to face the reality of your fiance no longer wanting to be with you, you had to come to terms with being backstabbed by the one person you thought would always be there for you. If that wasn’t enough, the two of them came to you later, informing you they wanted to be together and you needed to find a new assistant. As if you would somehow approve of their relationship. As if somehow you could ever want your best friend to assist you anyway.

In the end, you tried to convince yourself it was better this way. Better to find out before the wedding your ex was a total scumbag than after you were already married. It didn’t ease the pain any, and so you threw yourself into your work, studying scripts, signing another movie deal, pretending as if you weren’t completely shattered inside. Maybe it’s part of the reason you’re still taking things so hard, and something like a magazine headline could break your heart all over again.

“I am so sorry these people caused you so much pain.” His calm, yet deep tone brings you back to reality from your own thoughts. You look to him for the first time since you sat down, staring into the comforting eyes that shine a deep blue hue once again. He doesn’t say it, and you don’t question it, but it somehow feels as if he is heartbroken right along with you. There’s pain on his face, surprising you that for an android he has such a wide range of emotions. He feels for you in the moment, taking your heart ache right along with you, and something inside of you tells you he would take all the pain if he could.

“Well, it was a while ago,” you tell him, shrugging and forcing a small laugh to fall from your lips. Not that long ago, you remind yourself, but you try to put on a strong face for him. “Thank you. I’m sorry I’m such a mess right now.” A strained smile forms on your lips, trying to ease the situation. His expression doesn’t change, however.

“Please don’t apologize,” is all he says, reaching to wipe the remaining tears from your cheeks. “Don’t ever feel ashamed of your emotions. You never have to hide them from me. I’m always here for you.”

For a moment, you allow yourself to forget he is an android programmed to say the perfect things. For a moment, you tell yourself it’s all real, your feelings and his own. And for a moment, you allow him to comfort you not as an assistant, but someone that’s grown close to you in such a short time. You allow him to be your friend.

***

A few days after your panic attack and spilling your heart out to him, you begin to feel better. A weight was lifted off your chest when you were open and honest with him, allowing yourself to be vulnerable to the one person you are convinced could never hurt you. Well, the one android who could never hurt you.

You’re suddenly okay with that thought. He isn’t human, but as the last few months have gone by, you started to lose faith humans were any better. You couldn’t imagine him running off with your next partner. The thought even leaves you giggling to yourself.

Of course, good things don’t always last. One Sunday afternoon there’s a quick knock at your door, and your stomach feels heavy in an instant. Maybe it’s due to you always expecting things to go wrong when they seem right, but as your heavy feet carry you toward the door, your heart races while preparing for the worst.

The worst comes in the form of your ex-fiance’s sudden appearance at your home. He looks disheveled, longer hair than you remembered him having dangling in his eyes to almost cover the bags beneath them. Rough cheeks prove he hasn’t shaved in a while and his clothes, a simple t-shirt and jeans, look like anything but the normally put together dress shirts and slacks he wears.

“Sweetheart,” he says casually, as if just months ago he didn’t rip your heart into pieces. “It’s so good to see you. You look beautiful.”

You scoff. Normally you would be civil at the least, but just the sight of him draws back so many memories and feelings to the surface you didn’t want to deal with.

“What are you doing here, Brody?” From your words with your icy tone, he steps back. Did he really expect a warm welcome?

“I came to see you, sweetheart. It’s been too long and I…” He pauses, rubbing a hand behind his neck. “Well, I miss you, baby. I know things ended on bad terms, but I-”

“Bad terms?!” You don’t mean to, but your voice raises as you repeat his words. Anger bubbles in your chest to grow in your expression. You take a step forward, hands clenching into fists at your sides. “Bad terms? That’s what you call it?”

“Sweetheart, I-”

“Don’t call me that,” you interrupt, raising your chin proudly. You have too much respect for yourself to stand there and allow it. You may still have emotions you haven’t dealt with properly, but you won’t be a doormat. “Don’t call me anything. Just leave. I never, ever want to see you again, Brody.”

“Baby, listen,” he continues, stepping inside your apartment and closing the door behind him. Your mouth falls open, deciding if you’re either two seconds away from calling security or slapping him in the face. Of course, you’ve never been the violent type and couldn’t actually see yourself hurting someone, but if anyone can bring it out in you, it’s him.

“Brody, leave,” you repeat, tone more stern so he will get the hint. Even though, you realize, if he hasn’t gotten it by now, you aren’t sure what it will take.

“Just listen to me, I-” His words fall short, and suddenly his eyes dart to something behind you. In an instant his expression switches from nothing short of pitiful to almost offended. He straightens his back and wrinkles his brow, and it takes one quick glance behind you to spot your android assistant and see why his entire demeanor has shifted. “Who the hell is that?”

“That’s my new assistant.” You aren’t even sure why you answered him. He doesn’t deserve any explanations from you, but you guess maybe you’re a little proud of the fact you have him.

“Is everything okay, Miss?” He doesn’t hesitate to step behind you, so close you can feel the warmth of him on your back. When you turn to look at him, however, he isn’t looking down at you, but he is staring a hole into Brody.

“Everything is fine. Brody was just leaving.”

Your ex’s eyes bounce between the two of you. Suddenly he’s at a loss for words. You guess he’s feeling intimidated by the android’s size, or maybe it’s just his cool, calm, and collected attitude that makes him even more mysterious to strangers. But soon that intimidation turns to jealousy and anger, not wanting to feel weak in the moment, wanting to make himself bigger than he really is.

“I see what’s going on,” he begins, chuckling darkly and shaking his head. “You found someone new to fuck so you don’t need be anymore.”

You want to laugh at the ridiculous accusation, but you refrain. “Sure, that’s it,” is all you say with a roll of your eyes. A part of you wonders how you could have married someone like that, but jealousy is the ugliest trait. You decide you don’t care what he thinks. He’s no one to you anymore, and you only want to get rid of him. “Leave, Brody.”

His gaze switches between the two of you for a few seconds later, nostrils flaring, jaw clenched. For a split-second you’re worried he will lash out even more, but all he does is huff, shake his head, and turn around to leave with a slam of your door.

Finally you let out the breath you were holding. Turning to your assitant, you notice the ice cold expression he was giving Brody suddenly softened. His eyes fell to his usual color, easing the tension in the room as you looked into them.

“I’m so sorry.” You shake your head while sighing. “God, he’s such an asshole.”

“Are you alright?” He leans closer, placing his hands on your shoulders as if to inspect you.

“Yeah, I’m fine, I just…” You take a huge breath to exhale in a puff. You hate how worked up he can get you. Even after not seeing him for so long, all the old memories mixing with the anger to spiral into tense aggravation has you on edge. “I can’t stand what he does to me. How upset he can still make me.” You bite your lip, harder than usual, as your brows furrow and your foot taps eagerly on the wooden floors.

“May I suggest a method of calming you down?” he offers. “I want to help you relax.”

You ponder the thought, then eventually give in with your shoulders slumped. “What do you have in mind?”

“A massage. To ease the tension in your body and stress you’re currently under.” The suggestion has warmth blossoming inside of you. Such acts have never came up in the time he’s been with you. Though, you’ve never had to deal with your ex before, either. You do recall Mr. Park saying he could read situations and come up with solutions to help you.

Though, the thought of him touching you makes you feel… well, you aren’t really sure. Of course you feel safe with him. You’re convinced he could never hurt you, and would never be inappropriate with you. Everything he has done from the moment you got him has been professional, kind, and courteous. Still, a massage seems so personal. So intimate.

“Just your shoulders, Miss.” You assume you’ve been lost in thought for too long. “I won’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with. I just want to help you.”

“Oh, I know.” You chuckle more to yourself than to him. “I trust you. I really do, I just… you know what? Okay!” What the hell, you tell yourself. How many people get the opportunity to get a skilled massage from an android? Considering all the programming he has with cooking, you’re sure his knowledge in massages can’t be far behind.

A smile forms on his lips. “Great. Why don’t you get undressed and get ready for me on the bed. I’ll get a few oils and lotions I have.”

Your eyes grow wide. “Undressed?” You assumed it would be a simple massage. Nothing is simple with him, you think. Of course he would want to do it the proper way. As if you were getting a professional massage at a spa, something you have done hundreds of times. It’s no different with him.

He raises a brow. “Would you like to keep your clothes on?”

“No, it’s okay.” You quickly nod and smile.

“Okay, I’ll grab a towel for you so you can cover yourself.”

With a nod, he’s off grabbing a fresh towel from the linen closet and you’re making your way to your room. Before he grabs his oils from his own room, he knocks gently on the door before passing off the towel to you, making sure not to step in too far in case it would make you uncomfortable. Then he steps away to give you privacy, and you begin stripping down to nothing but your panties. There’s no need to take them off, of course, and you wrap the towel around you while waiting for him to return.

“Are you ready, Miss?” you hear his voice through the door, and all you can manage is a hum of ‘mhm’ before he steps inside the bedroom. “You can lay down, if you’re ready.”

He remains calm and professional, but your heart feels as if it will beat right through your chest. Relax, you tell yourself, it’s just a massage… I’ve had hundreds of them. None by any androids, however. None by him.

The thought sends your body reeling. Warmth builds in your chest, feeling the jittery nerves of excitement and anticipation mixed with the heart racing insecurity. You tell yourself to get it together, it’s no big deal. Part of you wants to believe it, but as you lay down on your stomach in nothing but your towel with panties underneath, you know it’s a new experience for the both of you.

“I’m going to use a calming oil that will relax your muscles. It’s lavender scented. I hope you enjoy it.” He talks as you hear the sound of him rubbing the oil in his large palms, and there’s no doubt inside of you that you will enjoy it. That’s what has you on edge. “I’m going to begin with your shoulders now, is that okay?”

Your heart flutters in the way he asks permission. He is always taking care of you, making sure you’re comfortable.

“Mhm,” you hum, scared if you actually speak your voice will be unsteady as it falls from your lips. A few seconds later, you feel his hands on your body. His palms press so gently against your shoulder blades as his fingers ghost over the sides of your neck you want to melt right into the mattress. He takes his time, easing you into the moment by caressing your skin, and when he hears the softest whimper leave your lips, he deepens his touch.

God, you think, his hands are so warm. So big and warm and touching you. You feel like a silly little girl for even caring, but his touch is so gentle, so careful and soft for a robot that can be so intimidating. He works the tension out of your shoulders, easing you into a relaxed state of bliss as your eyes begin to flutter. He takes his time and your body has his full attention. You feel him caress your shoulder blades, the sides of your neck, even a little farther down until you decide you don’t care at all where his hands go, you just want him to touch you.

You call for him, voice so airy and light with his name you almost didn’t recognize it.

“Yes?” he replies, not taking his attention away from his task.

“You’re so… gentle.” You giggle to yourself, suddenly on a natural high from feeling so at ease. It’s clear you haven’t felt so relaxed in months. “I didn’t expect it.”

“You expected something different?”

“Well, no,” you say, chuckling again, then whimpering when he begins working down your back. You hate to acknowledge the way your body reacts to him. You can feel your nipples hardening from his touch, pressing into the silk sheet beneath you to add even more friction. Your body is so hot beneath his hands, so worked up you begin to form an ache between your legs. You’re sure if you were to check, there would be a darkened spot on your panties from your arousal. Your cheeks burn at the thought, embarrassment flooding you all at once before it’s replaced by need from the tender way he touches you, but you can’t help it. His hands feel too good. It’s been too long since you’ve even been this personal with someone. “I guess I never expected you to be so… so careful. I’ve never… never been touched like this.”

“Does it feel good?”

You swear you think you heard a darker hint to his tone as he asked, sending a wave of heat through your body bursting from your core. You gulp, trying not to let the thoughts overwhelm you as he deepens the massage, his large, skilled hands working over every inch of your back.

“Y-Yes,” you whisper, then you bite your lip to keep yourself from making any more noises. You shut your eyes tight, but that doesn’t help, either. Instantly images of him pop into your mind, him going further, him touching you in different places.

You try to shake them from your head, but the longer he touches you, the worse it gets. You can just imagine his hands if you were on your back, massaging your breasts, toying with your hardened nipples by rolling the erect bed against his fingers. His gentle, careful hands would ease down your stomach, slip deep into your panties to feel how wet you’ve grown for him. Would he like it? You aren’t sure, but you can’t imagine him disappointing you if just his back massages feel this good.

You can only imagine what he could do between your thighs. Stroking your slit, teasing your clit, easing his long fingers inside your dripping heat to make you come against his hand.

Instantly it’s too much. You push the thoughts from your head before beginning to stir on the bed.

“I’m feeling better!” Carefully, you pull the towel up to cover your breasts before you stand. Your face is burning hot, body feeling so weak with need you suddenly feel lightheaded.

“Is everything okay?” Concern strikes his features. “Did I do something wrong? Did I make you uncomfortable?”

No, you want to tell him, my own thoughts made me uncomfortable. God, how could you get carried away like that? It was only a simple massage. How could you start having a full-blown fantasy of your assistant? He’s not even human.

“You’re fine. I am feeling much better now, thank you.”

He hesitates like he doesn’t believe you. But you’re sure he can sense you’re trying to convince him anyway. He doesn't push any further and you’re grateful.

“I’m glad you feel better, Miss.” He nods and steps back. “How about I get dinner started for you?”

“That would be great, thank you.” You can barely look at him as he walks out of the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. Once you’re alone, guilt instantly weighs heavy in your chest. You hate yourself for allowing your imagination to run wild. How could you think such things of him, especially when he has always been kind and professional? The question runs through your mind again and again, and you have no answer. You only know you don’t want him to get so close and personal again.

***

For a while after the massage from him, you keep any and all physical contact at bay if only to keep your own emotions in check. Even if you still feel safe and comfortable around him, knowing he would never do anything to bring you harm, you suddenly don’t trust yourself as much.

As the days pass, even if you keep your distance, you can’t help but to notice him more. You catch yourself staring when you think he doesn’t pay attention, realizing just how handsome he is. Of course, you knew that from the beginning, but it’s different somehow. As if when you look at him, you completely melt on the inside. His laugh has become all the more human, all the more real, and it has warmth blossoming in your chest when you hear it. Just being around him puts you in the best mood, and your troubles before with your ex-fiance and old assistant seem like such a distant memory.

It makes getting back to work easier, knowing he will always be there for you right by your side. You feel secure as long as he’s close by, and you even brought him to a party the director of the last movie you starred in was throwing. You decided to bring him as your unofficial date, even though only the two of you knew about it. To anyone else, he was just your assistant, but to you, you brought him along as a friend and someone to look out for you.

You dressed up in your favorite black, sparkly cocktail dress, and your heart skipped a beat when you saw him ready to go in his 3 piece suit and his hair combed back and styled perfectly. For a moment, you could only stare, suddenly feeling warm from how good he looked, and you couldn’t help but feel prideful in the fact that he was yours.

Your assistant, you quickly reminded yourself, shaking any other thoughts from your head as the two of you made your way to the party. Once you arrived, the lavish room of his home completely decorated with golden balloons, streamers, a table with expensive treats and his very own bartender to make you wide-eyed, the director pulled you away to gossip with this new actor and that one. You tried to be polite and make acquaintances, shaking hands and getting kissed on the cheek, but really all you wanted to do was know where your android was. It took a few glances around the room to spot him close by, keeping an eye on you as you politely downed another drink someone shoved in your hand and carried on the conversation with a chuckle here and there. You felt as if the room was spinning in no time, though that’s how these parties usually went. You were never one for this side of the business, but of course to get gigs you had to show up with a friendly face and make nice.

So you chatted some more with people you barely knew, always looking every once and a while to make sure he was close by. At one point, you turned to notice a few drunken d-list actresses clinging to him, and you could only imagine the conversation.

Thought it didn’t bother you. Once you met his eyes, he gave you a reassuring look to let you know his focus was on you, and you went back to listening to a boring actor talk about the last movie he worked on. You really didn’t care, but thankfully you had alcohol to make it seem like you did.

“So, like I was saying,” he begins again after finishing his shot, “I was on set with two tigers, and they warned me not to get too close, but I was like “Hey, I’m me!” and did it anyway, and then…”

His words drowned out. He has to possibly be the most boring, conceited actor you have ever met. He should get an award about having a story with tigers and you somehow still want to fall asleep listening. But you smile and nod, just like you are used to doing. By now, your face burns hot from the alcohol, feeling a little drained and ready to get out of the dress and heels.

“...so what do you say, sweetheart?” Your attention turns back to the man before you, watching him flick his hair from his eyes and sport a cheesy smile. “Wanna get out of here?” He reaches to place a hand on your shoulder, giving it a little squeeze with a lick of his lips.

Before you can tell him absolutely not, your assistant appears before you, his big body stepping in the way of the actor to block his view of you.

“Let’s go,” he says in a whisper, but you’re curious and the alcohol is causing a bit of confusion with you. Though, his stern tone makes your heart skip a beat, wondering if he knows something you don’t. “Please, come with me now.”

“Hey, we’re talking here…” The actor tries to shove him by his shoulder to get him out of the way, but your android assistant doesn’t even budge an inch. It was like a child trying to move a fridge, which irritated the man further. “Did you hear me?” The actor comes to his side, and you assume this can’t be good. He’s probably had too much alcohol and the last thing you want is to cause a commotion in the director’s home.

“This is my assistant,” you quickly tell him with a giggle. He finally acknowledges the actor, and for a moment you notice the shift in his eyes. The hues switch from a soft hue you’re used to into a fiery red in seconds.

“Oh…” It’s clear the man noticed the androi’s eyes, taking a step back. “Oh, your assistant is one of those.”

It’s not unheard of for androids to take on everyday roles now. They came into the limelight just a few years ago, and it seems every other person has one. The actor’s surprise of him shouldn’t come as a shock, but the tone in which he addresses him fills you with irritation.

“Funny,” he begins, becoming bold knowing the androids don’t have any violent tendencies. Well, as far as this guy knows, but you don’t doubt he would go to great lengths to protect you. “I thought it was supposed to take orders from you, not the other way around.”

The last thing you want is to put him in such a situation, however. You quickly apologize to the boring actor before your assistant guides you out of the party, already having called a car to pick the two of you up.

You call for him after slipping into the backseat of the black limo and feeling the car pull away to head home. The solid black partition was already raised, giving the two of you privacy. “What was that about? Why did you want to leave in such a hurry?”

“I noticed a shift in his tone and body language.” He says, turning to you with his soft eyes once again. Though his tone hasn’t eased any, and you wonder if the man inside the party somehow got to him. “He had impure motivations with you, Miss. I felt it was my duty to get you somewhere safe.”

Suddenly you burst into a fit of drunken giggles. “Is that all?” For some reason, you can’t stop laughing. He remains confused, brow wrinkling as his eyes flash between the normal hue and white, as if he were trying to understand what was so funny. “Most of the men there have those intentions. Not like they had a chance, anyway.”

“I wanted to make sure you were safe. You were intoxicated and your judgments could have been impaired.”

As he speaks, your laughter settles. “Oh well,” you sigh, getting more comfortable in your seat while drunkenly resting your head on his shoulder. Your eyes close, listening to the hum of the engine mixing with the tires on the road, suddenly so sleepy. “I was growing bored. My feet hurt.”

“Would you like a massage?”

If you didn’t drink so much, just the mention of the word massage would have made you a mumbling mess thanks to the last time he performed such an act on you. But you are too drunk to care, and too comfortable to move as you lay against him.

“No, thank you,” you tell him, snuggling closer and resting your arm around his stomach. “Will you hold me instead? Just until we get home?” Though it’s breaking your rule of no physical contact, you grow awfully needy when you’ve been drinking. Not to mention how warm he always is. It nearly puts you to sleep just laying beside him, and even more so when you feel a strong arm wrap around your body. He holds you close without hesitation as the two of you ride home in silence.

When you stumble inside your apartment, he helps you take off your heels at the door. Your hands fall to his shoulders to keep from being so wobbly, and he is gentle as he slips each one off with a grip on your calf. Before he stands, he looks up at you, his eyes meeting your eyes to see a soft, pink glow.

“How are you feeling?” The question makes your heart burst with warmth. He is always so attentive, so careful of you and what you need. He always says the perfect things at the right time, always checking in to make sure you’re comfortable.

“I-I’m okay,” is all you can manage, watching a smile form on his lips.

“Want me to help you to bed?”

You hesitate for a moment. That would also be breaking the rule of no physical contact, but you’re still feeling the effects of the alcohol and nothing sounds better than being taken care of in the moment. All you can do is give a quick nod and he’s rising to his feet. He takes your hand in his own, guiding you to your bedroom.

Once inside, he steps toward your bathroom to leave you lingering by your bed, the pillows and sheets looking ever so inviting in the moment. Then he returns, a few fresh make-up wipes in his hand. You almost want to laugh because of course he’s thought of everything, but all you can do is smile at him. Tenderly, he begins swiping the wipes over your face, cleaning the foundation and eye shadow, and even taking extra care going over your lashes. Once again, he’s as gentle as ever, taking his time to do it properly. It’s hard not to think about the fact that you’ve never even had a boyfriend so attentive. It’s easy to feel spoiled with him. It’s even easier when you’ve been drinking. You allow him to pamper you for a moment, clearing away the make-up and when he’s done, he steps behind you to tug on the zipper to your dress.

You call for him, feeling hot beneath his focused gaze.

“Yes?” He pulls his hands back, waiting on your voice to guide him.

“I think… I think I’ve got it from here.” You don’t know why it was almost difficult to tell him to stop. Maybe because part of you wants to see how far he will go, what lengths will he reach to please you. The other part is scared, but not of him. You’re scared of your own feelings, and your own heart, knowing how someone like you, once so broken and alone, could begin to fall for someone like him.

You don’t give yourself the chance.

“Goodnight, Miss,” is all he says, offering a smile before stepping out of your bedroom and shutting the door behind him.

***

They say when it rains, it pours, but they don’t tell you that there are moments of sunlight between the storms. You feel as if that’s what the past year has been for you. From finding out your ex-fiance was cheating on you with your best friend, you went into a spiral of overwhelming workloads to take your mind off of it. Then you met him, feeling as if there was a little hope for you to get your life back on track with having someone to actually assist and be there for you.

From tabloid headlines to bring all the memories back to finding comfort in his arms, all the way to feeling as if the storm was finally over just to be reminded of it all with a visit from your ex. In one way or another, life remains a rollercoaster for you, and now that you’ve had too many good days, the storm begins to roll in once again.

“I just can’t believe she could ask me that!” You pace back and forth in your living room, seething, on the verge of tears once again due to your past. Funny how you can hurt so much and it’s not even your fault. “She sat there and just said it! Flat out asked me how I feel about them getting engaged!”

He remains quiet, allowing you to pace, and vent, and do whatever you need to do, as long as you remain safe. He is settled on the couch, watching you stomp around in a circle, throwing your hands up in the air. It’s almost as if you’re having a conversation with yourself, but it’s not like you’re giving him much chance to speak, anyway.

“I spent months filming a movie and working my ass off only for them to want to bring up the fact that my ex-douche of a fiance cheated on me with my best friend and now they’re getting married.”

You huff, and groan, and eventually you fall next to him on the sofa. He says nothing, waiting until the time is right to speak, so you begin talking to yourself once again.

“Not to mention I no longer have the two people I was closest with in my life. I feel so alone sometimes even though it feels as if the whole world is looking in on my personal life and having opinions!” Leaning forward, your head crashes into your hands. “I thought at least the interviews and the press would take my mind off of it, but how could it when they only want to mention the one thing that absolutely crushed my heart. And you know what… it’s not even like I care! Let them get married. Whatever! But why is that all anyone wants to talk about? Why is that all anything everyone thinks of when they think of me? They are the ones that fucked up and I am the only one facing the consequences of it.”

Finally, it all comes crashing down at once. You realize how exhausting venting is, crumbling into the cushions to bury your head like a child. The tears well into your eyes, but you don’t dare let them fall. Not anymore. You’re too tired of crying over them. And it’s true, you don’t care they are getting married. You’re only upset that it keeps haunting you and not allowing you to move on. Not to mention how you felt like an idiot having to sit there and smile through the interview, letting the hosts get away with nosy questions they shouldn’t have asked in the first place.

“I’m sorry,” you finally say, pulling yourself from the pile of cushions and turning to face him. “I didn’t mean to freak out on you. I just… well, I don’t have anyone but you.”

“There’s no need to apologize, Miss.” He reaches to take your hand in his. “Your comfort is my top priority and as I understand it this ex-douche and your old assistant continue to cause you distress.”

You can’t help but to chuckle at him repeating your newfound nickname for your ex-fiance. He truly does know all the right things to say, even if it’s by accident.

“How about I run a hot bath to help you relax?”

At first you want to disagree and tell him that’s not necessary, but the idea of soaking your tense muscles in steaming water really does sound appealing. After a moment, you agree, and he is off to start running the water after telling you to wait just a moment. You remain settled on the couch, minutes passing until you hear him entering the living room once again.

“It’s ready,” is all he says before you rise to your feet and he guides you to the bathroom in the hall with a large jacuzzi tub. The smell of vanilla enters your nose in an instant, realizing he has dimmed the lights before placing a few candles around the bathroom. The water still runs gently into the tub, continuing to fill up while waiting on you. There’s a clean town ready for you on the side, along with a washcloth, and a fresh change of clothes for when you’re done.

“I added some drops of relaxing oils to the water. They should help sooth your muscles and make your skin feel soft.”

He’s thought of everything, you think, grinning to yourself. “You did all this just to help me?” He nods, flashing a bright smile you suddenly can’t seem to keep your eyes off of. You don’t remember ever seeing him grin so wide, as if he were proud of himself. The sight of it melts your heart.

“I wanted to make sure you were comfortable.”

“Thank you.” You smile in return, heart fluttering while feeling weak in the knees.

“Of course. It’s my pleasure. Would you like me to help you undress?”

Your eyes grow wide for a moment. Of course your first instinct is to shy away from him and tell him no. Though suddenly something deep within you is tempted to say yes. Maybe it’s the frustration you’re feeling, so tired of all the bad news, the heartache, the sudden emotions that come bursting to the surface. Maybe it’s in the way he always puts you at ease, and you just don’t want to be alone in the moment.

“If you’re uncomfortable, I’ll leave you be. Just know that I only want to help.” You hesitate for a moment longer, flipping back and forth between saying no, and begging him not to go, not to leave you. Eventually, the need to have him stay outweighs everything. There’s nothing to be ashamed of, you tell yourself. He’s there to help.

“I would like that.” Your voice seems so small in the moment, so shy and insecure at him helping you. He understands your hesitation, not daring to move too fast or too sudden as he reaches for you. He begins with the buttons of your blouse, plucking them slowly one by one while you look anywhere but at his hands working.

“Your smile earlier,” you suddenly say, maybe out of nerves as he undresses you, trying to think of anything else in the moment but how the butterflies in your stomach are fluttering like crazy. “Sometimes it’s so human... I guess that was the first time you’ve smiled like that.”

Your heart races as he grins wider, as if to show off the proud, human smile you’re talking about.

“I hear it eases humans and they find kind smiles attractive,” he replies. “Do you?”

Suddenly, you feel as if your heart will beat right out of your chest. There’s a playful tone in question. Was this an android’s attempt at flirting with you? “Well, yeah of course.” Then you chuckle, shying away from him with a bite of your lip. “You look so believable, yet unbelievable sometimes. Everything about you is so real. Sometimes I forget…”

“I’m not human?”

“Yeah…”

“I was made just for you. To make you comfortable and assist you. All of my features were designed specifically with your satisfaction in mind, even down to the smallest detail. Do you want to touch?”

Your eyes grow wide for a moment when you turn to look at him just as he peels back your shirt from your shoulders, leaving you in your skirt and silky, black bra.

“Touch?” You gulp, feeling so exposed, so hot under his gaze but not wanting to stop. The thumping of your heartbeat reaches your ears, already on edge, feeling jittery from the nerves, but you can’t imagine what will happen if he doesn’t continue.

“Yes,” is all he says, “you can touch me if you would like.”

You never thought about touching him, only what it would feel like if he touched you, but now you can’t turn down the opportunity. As you think it over, he eases your skirt down your hips to fall to your feet a few seconds before you finally reach out to brush the tips of your fingers over his cheek. In an instant his eyes flash, first white, then a pretty, pale pink, before settling back to the usual hue.

“Your eyes,” you comment. “They change colors sometimes.”

“Ah, yes,” he begins with a grin, “it’s how I show a response to certain situations. It’s the only way I can communicate without purpose, or to put it simply, a natural reaction to what is happening.”

“So… the pink? Is from…”

“Your touch.”

Your breath catches in your throat. You don’t want to get your hopes up that it means more than it actually does, but you can’t help it. You’ve seen his eyes a natural color, deep blue when he comforts you, even red when getting between you and the drunk actor at the party. All the way down to white when he is thinking something over, but pink…

Pink is for when the two of you are close. When he takes care of you. When he touches you. And now, when you touch him.

Your fingers continue to graze over his flesh, soft and clean and feeling so pure, before your thumb moves to his mouth. You feel the warmth of his bottom lip, the fullness and the way you move effortlessly over his faux flesh. As you touch, you notice the tiny pores beneath his lip. It’s such a small detail but it makes him so much more human. A perfect little imperfection and suddenly there’s warmth blossoming in your chest.

He’s perfect in every way. You feel like you don’t deserve him, but you don’t want him with anyone else, either.

“Would you like me to continue?” he asks, and then you realize you’re in nothing but your bra and panties. The tub is almost full by now, so before you respond, he reaches behind you to twist the faucet and turn the water off. You peek into the tub, seeing the steam rising to carry the scent of the vanilla candles on the counter through the entire room and out into the hall.

“Yes,” you quickly say before you lose the courage. It’s not even like you to be so shy in front of men, having been more than confident in the bedroom. But he is no ordinary man. He’s no man at all. He’s perfect, and he’s yours.

Without a word, he steps behind you to tug at the clasp of your bra. Gently, he allows the straps to fall from your shoulder before the fabric to the floor. You’re curious of his next move. Will he try to look at you? Try to touch?

He does neither. Instead he carefully tugs at the straps to your panties, slipping the thin fabric down your legs to pool at your feet. You’re completely bare in front of him, exposed, vulnerable.

Yet for the first time in a while, you don’t feel the need to shy away. Your heart is still racing, of course, and your knees feel weak, but the doubts and insecurities have turned to thrill. It’s exhilarating being in front of him like this. So carefree and open, he takes your mind off of your worries.

He steps in front of you a moment later. Your eyes meet his, but suddenly they no longer shine the pink hue you were getting used to. Now they’re red. A deep red, reminding you of passion and longing. Your heart skips a beat. Could he really be feeling attraction to you?

“Ready to step in, Miss?” he asks, keeping his cool, calm, collected aura though his eyes tell a different story.

You blink a few times just to make sure you’re not imagining it. “Your eyes…”

All he can do is look right back at you. As if he has no explanation for it himself, and maybe it’s better that way. Though it does leave you curious, and soon that curiosity turns to longing. There’s something igniting within the both of you, even if it doesn’t make sense. There’s no way he could feel anything for you, right?

In a sudden moment of boldness, you find yourself leaning closer, reaching for him, gripping his dress shirt tight in your fingers. You want to feel him near you, feel his soft skin against your own, those perfect lips against your flesh. Without thinking, you close your eyes, pressing your mouth to his, the softness of his skin heating you up, making you whimper against him. You linger for a moment, deciding you could die right then and there and it would be nothing but pure bliss. He’s warm against the kiss and you deepen the gesture by leaning into him. He accepts you, finally placing his hands on your bare hips and you can’t even think of being naked in front of him in the moment. All you can think of is how you have wanted to do this for far longer than you would like to admit.

When you pull away, you’re gasping for breath. Reality quickly sets in as a wave of embarrassment floods you, cheeks burning hot and now you’re too shy to look at him.

But when you do look at him, you’re stunned in silence. His eyes flash between different colors, white, pink and red. There’s bursts of purple and then they turn yellow, back to white, and then settle. It’s as if he’s overwhelmed and it’s the only way he can let you know, truly know, and your heart races beyond belief at the sight.

“I-I’m ready… ready now…” It takes you a moment for the words to come properly, remembering the steaming hot bath he prepared you. You realize there’s a small burst of pride blossoming in your chest, as if you finally got the answer you wanted all along. Maybe it doesn’t make sense to you in the moment, but you admit it feels right.

He nods and assists you into the tub. You ease your body into the warmth of the water, sighing at the way your muscles loosen in an instant. Though it doesn’t help the butterflies in your stomach any, but you have him to blame for that.

Still, you try to relax considering he prepared this all for you. Your eyes close and you sink lower into the tub, only hearing him shuffling about until his voice finally spills into the air.

“I’ll allow you to rest,” is all he says, and in an instant your eyes open, heart already longing for him when he’s not even gone yet.

You straighten your back and bring your knees to your chest. “Will you stay?”

The way he hesitates for a second would tell you he’s surprised, but then he smiles and nods. “Of course.” You’re smiling as well as he takes a seat on the edge of the tub.

“Will you hand me that washcloth?” You point to the fresh washcloth he had readied for you earlier, and he grabs it without hesitation to hand over. “Actually… will you…” You don’t finish the question, only handing the cloth back to him, and he quickly gets the idea of what you’re hinting at, rolling up the sleeves of his dress shirt to unveil strong arms with veins appearing from his hands and spiraling upward. It’s another small detail to make him more human, but it also makes you more breathless, finding him attractive while yearning for his touch.

“Sure.” He dips the cloth in the water to wet it before squirting a dollop of soap. He lathers it up for a moment, and you turn back around to offer him your back. Within seconds he’s washing you, rubbing the cloth from shoulder to shoulder, causing you to whimper once again beneath his touch. The memories of the massage come into mind, his gentle hands and the way he was so careful. Heat washes over you, an ache settling between your thighs.

You allow him to take his time. The feeling of him washing you eases every inch of your body, even if you are becoming aroused all over again from the situation. You try to ignore it, letting yourself be pampered by him.

When he pulls away, you assume he’s washed all he could reach. So, you lean back against the tub, exposing your chest, your breasts, for him. He waits a moment as you take a deep breath, then he leans in to begin tending to the newly uncovered areas.

His touch remains delicate. He’s gentle as he moves over your skin. You feel your nipples hardening as he brushes the cloth past them, offering a quiet moan in return. You want to know what his expression looks like as he washes you, but your eyes are shut too tight. You’re far too nervous to take a peek, so you keep them closed to focus on the feeling of him taking care of you. Warmth spirals from between your thighs to the pit of your stomach and finally your chest. The ache grows nearly painful between your legs. You lick your lips and whimper beneath his touch, breaths becoming heavy, needing more.

You call for him, but you aren’t even sure what to say. What could you say? How do you tell him his touch does incredible things to your body and you want to get off? Even the thought sounds ridiculous to you. How could he make you ache with need more than any man ever has when he isn’t even human? How could you be so turned on from the simplest of touches from him? “Could you.. I mean… I need…”

You’re a mumbling mess, not knowing how to beg for him even if you could muster up the courage. Your head falls back against the tub, trying to clear your head with a gulp, and he continues to massage your chest though he’s been done washing you for a while.

But it’s as if he can sense what you need. Like he was made to give you what you crave even when you can’t ask for it. He disregards the cloth to the side, allowing his hand to meet your skin and you release a gasp in return. He’s touching you, all of you, running his hand down your chest, over your breasts, remaining cautious the entire time. You can’t help but to whimper while pushing your body into his hand. Even if the words fail you, you realize you can ask in other ways. You can show him what you need.

“Can I touch you?” he suddenly asks, and the simple question leaves you breathless. His tone is deeper, darker, suddenly needier than you have ever heard him before. Considering he’s already touching you, the question can only mean one thing. “Can I pleasure you?”

Such a simple question but it leaves you shaking with need. It burns hot inside of you, feeling as if you’ll combust if he doesn’t do just that.

“Please…”

It’s all he needs to hear. His hand brushes past your stomach, fingers dancing for a moment below your belly button. It’s as if he’s giving you a chance to tell him no, to back out. But you say nothing, only parting your thighs for him before he dives deeper into the water.

The moment you feel him brush over your mound, your senses go haywire. A rush of lust and heat overwhelms you, eyes shutting tight as you lick your lips, back arching from the side of the tub. Just the simple touch already has you so worked up and you’re dying for more.

As his fingers slip down your slit, a gasp falls from your lips. Ever so slightly your hips roll, begging for more without words. He wastes no time giving you what you need, though he does draw the moment out. His fingers caress up and down your slit, working you up further, drawing out a quiet whimper before you’re breathless. He teases and plays between your thighs, surprising you that he can already know how to touch.

Finally he finds your clit, brushing over the swollen bud to leave you gasping. You bite down on your bottom lip and grip the edge of the tub, feeling his fingers ease over your delicate areas with care. He starts slowly, massaging small circles into your flesh, and your body calms from being tense. You give into the pleasure beginning to build, allowing him to take control of the situation, to make you feel good. He tends to your aching folds as you begin to whimper, heavy breaths falling, hips moving against him.

You call for him, releasing his name in a breathless whisper. “God, please… please, don’t stop.” No longer are you feeling shy and insecure. He brought out the desires in you and now you only have one thing on your mind.

“You’re shaking,” he tells you, his deep, needy tone hinting at amusement. His fingers begin to work faster, drawing out each and every bliss-filled moan from your body. You can hold back no longer, letting go of all your worries and giving in to the way he makes you feel. “Does it feel good?”

“Y-Yes,” is all you can manage, biting down on your bottom lip a second later while focusing on the feel of his fingers against your skin. Suddenly, he leans closer, his deep, dark voice a whisper in your ear.

“Do you like it when I touch you like this?” The question leaves you even more breathless, as if the words suck the air right out of your chest. His tone demands an answer and his fingers work quicker against your clit.

“God… yes,” you gasp, back arching from the side of the tub, thighs threatening to close around him. “It feels so… so good.”

“Come for me,” he encourages with a low growl in your ear. “Come on my fingers. Let me hear those sweet little noises you make when you come undone.”

God, who was he? He was suddenly a different person, though you couldn’t complain. The words were everything you needed to hear as he brought you closer to the edge. His fingers on your clit felt like magic, warmth bursting through you without warning, bliss finally spilling over and surging through your body. Your head falls back, thighs clasping around his hand, rolling your hips and whimpering, moaning, so breathless all at once. Your body shakes beneath him, trembling with pure pleasure, stars in your eyes from how tight you’re squeezing them shut.

Then you begin to come down, still shaking, still breathless. He soothes your body with a gentle kiss to your temple, making your eyes flutter open to look at him. There you notice the hue of his eyes, a color between pink and purple, almost as if it’s melting between the two. You look at him for a moment, so at peace, so relaxed and on cloud nine. He grins in return, only staring back at you for a moment before he leans in to press his soft lips against your forehead.

You don’t say much as he helps you finish your bath. You realize you’re too exhausted for words. Instead, you allow him to take care of you. He pulls the drain to the tub before helping you out, grabbing the towel to begin drying you off. He remains careful with his every motion until you’re dry and he wraps the towel around you. Then he guides you to your bedroom before you crawl into bed, tossing the towel to the side and slipping beneath the covers.

You call his name.

“Yes?”

You bite your lip to hide your grin. Somehow you’re still on cloud nine. “Will you stay here tonight?” you ask him, feeling shy with your voice low. “With me?”

His smile flashes once again. “Of course.”

***

In the morning, the memories of the night before hit you like a ton of bricks. It feels like a dream at first, only hints here and there of what happened. Images of him helping you undress fill your mind first, then you touching his face comes next. What follows is a quick sequence of you stepping into the tub and then suddenly you’re begging for him to touch you.

Your eyes pop open, heart pounding against your ribs. Suddenly you can’t breathe, but for different reasons. Suddenly embarrassment floods you, feelings of guilt weighing on your heart, wondering how you could be so stupid to do such a thing.

He isn’t real.

He’s not human.

How could you use him like that just to feel close to someone after so long? Have you really gotten that lonely? Has your heart been broken beyond repair?

The questions run through your mind one after another, suddenly feeling sick to your stomach and needing to get out, away, anywhere but there. Luckily, he isn’t next to you when you hop out of bed.

Good, you think, you can maybe sneak past him to head out. You aren’t even sure where you’ll go, you just need to get out. Clear your head. Take time to think away from the enticing android probably in the kitchen making you breakfast.

The thought sends your stomach churning all over again. You aren’t sure if it’s because it makes you feel so pathetic in the first place, or if it’s because part of you feels as if you have somehow taken advantage of him. He has been nothing but kind and professional since he arrived. How could you start to feel so many things for him all at once? How could you ask him to perform such an intimate act on you?

You can’t give the thoughts another second of your time. At least not right now, deciding to rush to the bathroom to freshen up as quickly as you can before getting dressed. After washing your face, brushing your teeth, and managing your hair enough so it doesn’t actually look like you just woke up, you throw on a simple t-shirt and jeans before sneaking out of your bedroom.

You peek into the hallway first, spotting him nowhere in sight and not taking a moment to realize how ridiculous this is. You shouldn’t be sneaking around. You should face your problems head on, admitting to what you actually did with him.

But it’s all too overwhelming, and you can’t even understand your emotions at the moment. How could you face them?

Tip-toeing into the living room, you finally notice him in the kitchen as the smell of breakfast hits your nose. His back is to you, guilt weighing you down all over again as you think for a moment about if you could sneak past him. Just slip on by, grab your shoes and bag, and run out the door.

Before you have the option, he turns around to spot you. Instantly, he brightens the entire room with his smile. “Good morning,” he greets you, as if nothing is wrong. As if what happened the night before didn’t actually happen. “I’m making you breakfast. Toast and eggs, just how you like.”

The sight of him instantly has your heart crumbling into pieces. You want nothing more than to pretend nothing is wrong, but the guilt and embarrassment won’t allow it.

“Sorry,” you quickly say, turning away from him because you’re afraid if you stare at him any longer, you’ll be tempted to stay. “I have to go.”

“Go?” he asks, but you ignore him to slip on your sneakers resting by the door. “You didn’t have anything planned for today. Would you like me to-”

“No!” You turn around, shaking your head and clearly leaving him confused. He blinks a few times, eyes flashing white while trying to read your mood, but you have already stayed longer than you would have liked. “No, sorry, I just really need to go…”

With that, you rush out the front door without another word. You’re rushing too fast toward the stairs at the end of the hall to focus on the guilt building in your chest, the way your stomach churns. On top of coming to terms with what happened the night before, now you feel worse for brushing him off as you did.

He didn’t deserve that, you tell yourself, he did nothing wrong. It was all me.

Tears begin to well in your eyes, but you don’t dare let them fall. You blink them away while rushing from the apartment to the sidewalk, ignoring the looks a few pedestrians give you while making your way to the only place you can think of in the moment.

***

It’s been a while since you’ve been to Mr. Park’s office. The furniture in the lobby is rearranged from the last time you were here picking up your new assistant, and he even has a new secretary settled behind the desk. The secretary that is now rushing to you, informing you can’t possibly barge into Mr. Park’s office, but that’s exactly where you’re heading.

“I need another assistant.” The words come bursting out the second you walk in, spotting Mr. Park behind his desk, glasses on his face that are now lowered to see his brows raised.

“Ma’am, you can’t be in here!” the secretary continues to tell you, but Mr. Park shoos her away, telling her it’s okay.

“Something wrong with your android?” he asks, setting down the papers he was reading to give you his attention. “Was there a malfunction or-”

“No, no that’s the problem… he’s perfect. Too perfect!” You sigh in frustration, sinking into a leather chair on the opposite side of his desk. “I need someone not so… young, and good-looking, and someone that doesn’t say exactly what I want to hear and do everything I want him to do in the moment, and someone…”

“Someone that’s not perfect for you?” Mr. Park interrupts, a coy smile on his lips. You aren’t even sure why he’s humoring you considering you barged in. Reality sets in and has heat bursting into your cheeks, wondering what has gotten into you lately. You would normally have never been so rude. “He is everything you asked us for, isn’t he?”

“...and more,” you admit in a low, hesitant voice, slumping down in your chair with a frown. Mr. Park laughs, ridding the room of tension even though you feel completely miserable inside.

“Having second thoughts about an android as an assistant?”

“More like too many thoughts, and feelings, and even more I should not be experiencing.”

“Who says?” He frowns with the question.

“Me! I say! He’s not even human, but I’m…” You pause mid-sentence, causing his eyes to grow wide. “He’s perfect. He’s too good to be true, honestly. I don’t know how to accept how I am feeling for him when I feel so ashamed because he isn’t even real. He’s perfect for me because he was only programmed to be. Nothing more. It’s not actually real.”

“Well, that’s only partly true.”

Your eyes flick toward him with a furrowed brow, a sudden spark in your chest. “What do you mean?”

“Sure, this android might not be one hundred percent human, but he once was.” Mr. Park pulls the glasses from his face before rubbing his eyes, making it clear he has been reading his paperwork for too long. Maybe that’s why he’s humoring you. He just needed a break, and maybe some entertainment considering you’re a second away from a meltdown. “Many years ago, the first ever android made by our company was modeled after a real human being.”

You blink, mind already spinning with questions and curiosities, but you say nothing and allow him to explain.

”Real human, real personality, characteristics, history, feelings and responses to situations. We have even had androids who once were thought to be malfunctioning because they expressed their own desires and emotions, and were eventually thrown out. Turns out, after a few years we realized we could use that mistake to better them.” He offers a smile at the thought, as if he is proud of the progress his company has made. “Since then we have, of course, advanced our technology and creation of the androids for many purposes, but the core of what makes our androids special will always remain the same.”

“What are you saying, Mr. Park?” You sit up in your chair, giving him your full attention as you hang on to every word.

“He is as real as you want him to be. He grows with you, learns from you. After a while, though our important programming and data will remain functional, he’s hardly our creation. He’s yours.”

“You mean…” You feel as if your heart will stop beating at any second. “He can feel things for me? He can grow to…”

“To care for you and eventually love you?” He chuckles, and your mouth falls open the moment he nods his head in delight. “Of course. The technicalities of what makes him run may not be human, but what he develops to feel for you certainly is. It came from a real place, after all.”

There it is. The main thing holding you back from him. After months of ignoring your feelings and desires, Mr. Park tells you in a few words it was all pointless anyway. There’s no need to worry over him not being real when the things he can feel (and it surprises you he even can feel things) are very much real. The way he responds to you is real and is natural. It’s the reason his eyes shift colors. It’s the reason it makes it so easy to fall for him.

“But I… I mean I did… things…”

Mr. Park smiles, getting the hint from your shyness and the way your words fall that you are hinting at the physical relationship with him. “Do you feel guilt because of it? Because you allowed yourself to be loved? You allowed yourself to be shown pure affection?”

“Well ,when you put it like that…” You bite your lip, images of the night before flashing in your mind. He took such good care of you, and it’s hard to deny how much you needed it. Your body craved him, but even more, your mind deserved release and your heart was dying to feel something other than pain and distractions. “I guess I feel like I did something wrong because I didn’t think he could feel things. How could he agree to do… that with me when he’s programmed to do whatever I want? I didn’t want to force him. I didn’t want him not to have a choice.”

“Oh, believe me,” Mr. Park begins, throwing his head back with laughter, “an android will never do something it doesn’t want to. They have a lot more free will than one would like to believe. Trust me, I could tell you a few stories.”

“Really?” you ask, suddenly feeling a little more at ease over what happened.

“Yes, yes, I could, of androids hating their original purposes and picking completely new ones all on their own, but we’ll save that for another day,” he says with a smile. “Your android was programmed to do what you wanted, that’s true, but it’s not the specific actions that are just some simple tasks his processor handles. He was programmed to be your companion, your protector. What that means for him is ultimately up to him, do you see?”

As he speaks, the guilt weighing you down like a thousand pound weight feels lighter with every word. He was created for you, to be perfect for you, but the relationship the two of you have is real. What he feels for you is real, and what you feel for him in return is not wrong. Maybe the parts aren’t human, that’s true, but the experiences the two of you shared, the way he makes you feel warm and safe, your happiness when he is near, it’s incredibly real and nothing to be ashamed of. You see that now.

“Thank you, Mr. Park.” You quickly stand with a smile before your emotions begin to overwhelm you.

“Of course,” he says, standing to walk you to the door, “but how about a phone call first? You bursting in here nearly gave me a fright and I’m not as young as I used to be.”

“Oh, right,” you begin, giggling in embarrassment. “I’m sorry. Thank you!”

You leave his office while giving an apologetic glance to the secretary to finally make your way home.

***

“You’re troubled.” He sits with you at dinner, though the two of you haven’t spoken much. When you arrived home, you admit you were feeling better thanks to the talk with Mr. Park, but you still had to deal with actually facing your emotions. It’s one thing to talk about it with someone not involved, and an entirely different thing to be face to face.

You apologized for running out on him, and of course he told you it was nothing to apologize for. He asked if everything was okay, and you lied and told him you were fine, only to sneak away to your office to clear your head before dinner. A little while later, he called you when it was ready, realizing he had another one of your favorite meals laid out on the dining room table.

“I just have a lot on my mind,” you tell him, and it couldn’t be more of an understatement.

“I’m here if you want to talk about it,” he says, just like he always does, and no matter what you do or how you act, he is always there to comfort you. The thought has you both the warmth spiraling in your chest and guilt weighing you down, but it’s only from not knowing how to tell him what was bothering you. You want to be open and honest with him. He deserves that much.

A few moments of silence pass, and he doesn’t push any further.

“How do you feel about me?” you suddenly ask before you lose the courage. You look to him, staring into his eyes as if it will help you find the answer.

“My purpose is to assist you and be there for anything you need,” he replies, and you almost want to laugh at his proper, programmed response.

“No, I know, but I mean… how do you feel about me?”

He pauses for a moment and you grow more anxious with every second that passes. Your heart beats quicker, harder, nearly on the edge of your seat until his calm, soothing voice brings you back down.

“Being with you makes me happy. I don’t want to be anywhere else if it’s not by your side. Seeing you every day gives me purpose. You put meaning into my life, and I hope for it to be that way for as long as I live.” You have no words the moment he stops speaking. All you can do is stare at him, blinking, lips parted, on the verge of tears because his words wrapped around your heart and nearly squeezed all the life out of it before receiving you once again, but you don’t allow them to fall. His confession overwhelms you, not knowing exactly what you were expecting, but it definitely wasn’t that. He notices he left you speechless for a moment, so he continues with a smile, eyes falling to his lap as if he’s suddenly in his own little world. “Seeing you happy makes me happy, but more than that… I feel complete. You’re the reason I exist. You’re my reason for everything. So I want to be with you, not only because it’s my purpose, but because I love you.”

The first tear hits your cheek when he stops speaking and by the time you call his name, they fall freely. You can’t hold them back. You can’t hold yourself back, either.

You rush to him, wanting to feel him close, wanting him to hold you. And he does, wrapping arms around you as you settle in his lap, lips crashing into his as you clutch his shirt tight in your fist. The tears continue to fall, but you don’t pull away, so overwhelmed with relief and so full of love for him.

You love him, and he loves you, and it’s completely, entirely real. There’s no explanation needed beyond that. You don’t need a reason to feel the way you do, you just need to love him.

“I’m sorry,” you say when you pull away. “I went to see Mr. Park today because of what happened. I was so scared of how I was feeling and I was so worried I did something wrong. I felt so ashamed for feeling the way I felt and I just wanted… I just…”

You’re breathless by the time your rambling words fail, and all he can do is pull you close. Your head falls against his shoulder, allowing him to hold you as you cry.

“You don’t ever have to apologize to me.” He begins caressing your back to soothe your tears. You can only clutch him tighter, never wanting to let him go in the moment. “I understand. There were… moments when I felt confused as well. I can only imagine the emotions you were experiencing.”

Pulling away from his chest, you sniffle and while wiping your cheeks of the tears. “You were confused?”

He grins and nods. “I wasn’t prepared to feel the things I felt for you. I was tested a lot when I was made. I was given instructions on how to do many things, but falling in love with my human was never brought up.”

His way of speaking, his serious tone and matter-fact-words as if everything has to be textbook definition explanations makes you begin giggling. He chuckles as well, pulling you to him and wrapping both arms around your body now. You can’t resist leaning in and giving him a peck on the lips because God, you’ve wanted to do it for so long and be like this with him you feel as if you have to make up for lost time.

“But they said you were a companion… able to get, uh, physical if the person wanted.” You aren’t sure why it still makes you so shy to think about. Maybe it’s because it’s all so new or maybe it’s just because he is perfect, and you never want to be anything less than that for him as well.

“That’s true, I am capable of responding to my human’s needs after reading their body language.” Your cheeks are suddenly hot with his words as he speaks, wondering just how far he could go. “Physical relationships are different from emotional ones, however. They told me you needed an assistant and nothing more. I never expected to get so close to you. I never expected…”

“To do what you did last night?” For a second his eyes flash that dark, deep red that makes your body burn, and then they settle. “I didn’t expect it either. Any of it, honestly, but I can’t help it. I love you, too. I’m not ashamed of it anymore. I want to be with you.”

His eyes shift from his default color to yellow as you speak, and your chest blossoms with love all over again. It fills you up just to look at him, so in love and for the first time, it’s all you feel. You feel his love and he feels yours, and for the first time in a while you’re truly happy.

***

A few days pass while getting comfortable with your new relationship with him. Even if you aren’t ashamed anymore, it does take some getting used to. You’re less shy around him, allowing him to run your baths and pamper you without worries. He even sleeps in the bed with you. Well, you sleep, and he rests, and you enjoy his warmth all night long while he lies next to you, holding you, keeping you safe and comfortable in his arms.

You don’t bother pushing the relationship any further because it’s all so new and enjoyable to be with him as simply as that. He still cooks for you and manages your work schedules just like he was programmed to do, but there are times when he feels more like a boyfriend and less like an assistant. The thought always makes you giggle, and you want to bring it up to him one day, wondering what you are to one another, but in the end you decide it doesn’t matter. He’s your android, and you’re his human. It doesn’t need any more explanation.

Eventually, the desires do rise again. Especially in the moments when he offers to give you a massage, or tends to you in the bath. When he kisses you good night, holds you against his chest, and does all the things a proper boyfriend would do. You fall even more in love with him and with nothing holding you back, each day that passes you grow more curious about his response to your needs, as he put it. Your body begins to grow hot at the simplest of touches. It’s clear you crave to get closer to him, going further than you went before when he touched you between your thighs. He never pushes, however. He never does anything you don’t want him to, but you aren’t sure how he will respond when you make it clear exactly what you’re wanting.

You’re also more than curious about him, seeing and tending to his body just like he has yours. There’s been a few times during a massage or bath that you’ve wanted to touch him as well, though you never knew how to go about it. Of course, you’re more than confident he wouldn’t mind, but you wanted it to feel right.

One night while you’re in bed after you’ve showered, the curiosities get the better of you. “What you said about responding to my needs…”

“Yes?” He arches a brow, looking over you tucked beneath the sheets already. He was just getting situated himself when you decided to ask, so he settled for having a seat on the edge of the bed in front of you.

“What about your needs?” You bite your lip, waiting for him to answer.

“My needs?” His expression twists to surprise, but you can’t blame him.

“Do you have needs?” you question, voice lowering with every word. “Can you feel pleasure, too?” It’s not that you’re embarrassed to ask him, but more so you aren’t sure how to get the point across. You wonder if it’s silly to think about such things. You imagine most android owners don’t bother with their needs, but you want to be mindful of what he wants as well. You’re also curious. Can he feel pleasure? Can he even get aroused?

“Of course,” he begins, and you assume he’s going to tell you how your pleasure is his pleasure, how making you happy makes him happy, but that’s not what you want to know.

“I mean… sexually…” Now you’re feeling shy, but you gather the courage to sit up from the bed and reach for him. “Like… how does this feel?” Your hand falls to his thigh, caressing over the blue, silk pajama pants he wore to bed. Suddenly you feel him tense beneath your palm, the muscles of his thighs tightening much to your surprise. You didn’t even know he could react in such a way.

“I like it,” he says without hesitation. “I feel … good when you touch me.” You look up, meeting his eyes to spot a familiar deep red hue within them to confirm the words he tells you.

“Can you become… aroused?” The last word leaves your lips in a whisper. You feel so silly in the moment, being shy about simply asking questions, feeling like a school girl in sex-ed getting too curious for her own good. “What if I touched higher?” Before he can reply, your hand shifts up his leg, skimming over what feels like a bulge in them. You gulp, never having touched him like this. Suddenly your nipples are hard, pressing tight against your thin nightgown, heat building between your thighs.

You palm him through his pants, surprised to feel him growing harder beneath your touch. Your heart races but you can’t pull away. You want to touch him, and from the groan he releases, he wants it, too.

“I am currently aroused, so yes, I can become aroused.” You giggle and bite your lip at the way he answers. It suddenly lightens the mood, realizing he is enjoying what you’re doing to him.

“You’re getting hard.” You meet his eyes again to see the passion burning within them. Part of you only did this as an experiment because you were curious. The rest of you wants to finish because he seems to be enjoying it so much.

“You’re touching me,” he replies, a smirk appearing on his lips that makes you giggle again.

“I’m sorry for the questions,” you tell him, “I was just curious. I wasn’t sure… how it worked.” But you don’t stop caressing him. You don’t think you could stop at this point after feeling him grow beneath you and his eyes telling you how much he likes it.

“How it worked?” He raises a brow and smirks. “I can show you.”

Your cheeks burn hot from his words, knowing he was only teasing you, easing the tension in the situation to make you feel even more comfortable. “I mean, being with you. How all of that works. You responding to my needs. How it feels for you when I touch you.”

“Do you want it to feel good?” he asks, tone deepening to send a shiver down your spine. “Do you want to bring me pleasure?”

Your breath catches in your throat. Images flash in your mind of all the ways you could make him feel good, all the ways you want to make him feel good and all the things you want to do to him.

“Yes,” you say breathlessly. “I want to make you feel good, just like you did for me. Is it possible for you to, uh, for you to… you know.”

“To have an orgasm?” He doesn’t beat around the bush. In the moment, you’re thankful, even if the blunt words catch you a little off guard. You nod your head in response. “Sure, but not in the typical way humans do.”

“How so?” You cock your head to one side, embarrassment pushed away for the moment to fully take in his words.

“My senses aren’t like yours, but I do have them. They can become overwhelmed in a positive way with certain emotions, certain affections from someone I am fond of. The sensors inside me either react positively, negatively, or neutral to the source of the touch.” Your eyes are wide as he speaks, hanging on to each word because it’s so new and interesting to you. Not to mention it will help you become closer. You’re thankful of that. “If there’s a lot of positive response all at once, which I imagine any pleasure from you would cause, well… you can guess.”

He “comes”, you think, but you keep it yourself.

“So it feels nice?”

“It’s one of the best feelings I am told, but I haven’t experienced such a thing myself. Some would say it’s close to being in love, but nothing can compare to being in love with you.”

Smacking your lips, you roll your eyes before giggling. “When did you get so cheesy?” Before he can reply, you lean closer, pressing your lips to his, showing your thanks for him putting up with all your questions, and even letting him know you don’t mind his cheesiness once in a while. He pulls away from your lips smiling, and you’re grinning from ear to ear yourself.

“As I was made to believe, human women enjoy this kind of romantic banter?”

You burst into giggles at the statement, but you can’t disagree. It does feel good coming from him.

“True,” you tell him. “There are other things human women and men enjoy that we haven’t went over, yet.”

“Oh?” He raises a brow, and in a moment of courage, you go to him. Swinging a leg over his lap, you straddle him, wrapping arms around his neck while looking down at him.

“I can show you,” you tease him just as he did before, watching his eyes flash between pink and red. The sight makes you giggle and bite your lip, realizing it’s his form of being flustered.

“I would love nothing more than to know.” His response sends a child down your spine while feeling his hands grip your hips. Without thinking, you begin to move back and forth over his lap, grinding softly against him until you feel his arousal once again.

“Sometimes it feels good like this,” you tell him, voice becoming unsteady due to you wearing no panties beneath your nightgown. Your bare slit rubs against the silk of his pajama pants, feeling his hard and needy cock against you. “I can feel you getting hard. It makes me really wet to feel you like this.”

For the first time he shows with more than just his eyes how flustered he’s become. His lips part and his eyes widen, fingers gripping your hips tighter as you grind against him. Of course, you’re sure if he can know the proper ways to touch you and get you off in the bath, he probably knows anything else you can tell him. But the game of teacher and student is suddenly too thrilling. It has warmth flooding your body, feeling so powerful on top of him, telling him what you like and finally understanding what makes him feel good as well.

“Does it feel good to rub your clit against my cock like this? To feel how hard you’ve made me?” His expression darkens, deep red in his eyes once again. He plays along with you, understanding in an instant your mood and what your body needs. You bite your lip, nodding and pressing yourself harder against him as the heat rises to your cheeks. Your body aches for him, clit throbbing and dying for his attention.

“It feels so good,” you tell him, breathless from your swollen clit rubbing against silk. “I could come like this, riding you just like this, but there is another way I like to get off.”

“Mm, how’s that?” He can’t help but to groan. Clearly you’re hitting all the right sensors in his body while straddling him. It begins to affect you more as well, feeling your nipples harden, pressing against your nightgown, as well as the arousal that drips from your core. You feel yourself growing hotter, wetter, grinding against him as the bliss fills your body.

“By you tasting me,” you answer, feeling even more bold than before. You’ve thought about his mouth on you, those perfect lips pressing to your slit, giving you pleasure, sucking on your clit. The images flash in your mind and it’s suddenly all too overwhelming. You crave him. You need him.

“I would love to taste your pretty little pussy, baby.” He reaches to cup your cheek, causing you to gulp from his words and become breathless at the sudden term of endearment. It makes you feel warm all over again, and at the same time, so loved. “I would love to feel you come on my tongue, feel you shaking beneath me as you call my name and I give you pleasure.”

“Oh…” You can’t help but to lean in, pressing your lips to his, showing him passionate affection in the heat of the moment. He grips your body as you lean closer, giving him your all as his hands cup your ass and hold you close. You whimper against his lips, wanting more, needing all of him in the moment.

You pull away breathless and it only takes him a few seconds to have you on your back, carefully placing you next to him on the bed. Then he crawls to his knees, and you can’t take your eyes off the bulge in his pants. It makes your body yearn for him, to feel him inside of you, but first, he wishes to taste you just like you mentioned.

“Spread your legs for me,” he commands, voice deep and needy. You do as he says, opening yourself for him as his head dives between your thighs. You feel his lips against your flesh a moment later, placing an open-mouthed kiss to your mound, teasing you, working your body up only for him to offer the release for you to come back down.

You call for him, reaching down to entangle your fingers in his hair. He groans from the sensation before you feel him part your folds with his tongue. A gasp fills the bedroom, back arching from the bed as he slides his tongue down to your soaked entrance and back up to your clit. Your mind grows numb, body too overwhelmed to think about anything other than focusing on the pleasure, the feeling of him messaging your flesh. He takes his time, starting out slow, teasing you, drawing out a few whimpers and curses beneath your breath. Your hips move to grind yourself against his face, coating his flesh in your slick arousal, hearing him groan from the way your body responds to him.

Then he drags his velvet tongue down to your entrance once again, dipping inside your heat before moving to your clit in a blissful pattern. Your body begins trembling just like he said it would, so far gone while losing control of your senses. Filling the bliss building between your thighs, you call out his name, breathless, gasping for air and gripping the strands of his hair tight. He groans between your legs while leaving open-mouthed kisses over your clit, all before massaging the swollen bud in circles.

His mouth drives you wild. Your back arches from the bed, eyes screwing shut, mouth falling open. Whimpers fill the room and he never pulls away from between your thighs even as you cry out to him that you’re coming. The bliss builds and bubbles over to send red hot pleasure surging through your entire body. It builds at your core and reaches your fingers and toes in waves, shaking, rolling your hips, getting every last ounce of pleasure you can from him.

He doesn’t pull away even after you begin to come down. He offers sweet, soft kisses against your inner thigh to soothe your body, hands caressing your sides as you try to catch your breath. Even if the room is still spinning, your eyes flutter as you look for him. You meet his gaze as he stares up at you from between your legs. His eyes are a pale pink, yet so warm and inviting. Just the sight of him brings you enough peace to feel as if it will last forever.

You would like nothing more than for this moment to last as long, but you also want to prove you meant what you said about making him feel just as good. As you begin to gain control of your senses, he crawls up your body to rest next to you on the bed. His lips fall to your skin, pressing soft kisses here and there, against your cheek and temple, but it doesn’t take long for you to take control of the situation.

Carefully, you push him down to the bed while settling on your knees. “I want to make you feel good.” The words have his eyes flickering between pink and red, sending another wave of warmth through your body. This time it’s for the love and affection you feel for him, knowing he feels the same.

“I would enjoy it that very much,” is all he can manage, causing you to smirk. Gently, you tug on the hem of his shirt and he gets the idea. He helps you pull it over his head before you toss the fabric aside, leaving him in nothing but his pajama pants as your eyes scan every bare inch of him.

Of course, he’s been shirtless a time or two around you in the middle of changing, but you’ve never seen him like this before. You’ve never taken a moment to study the outline of every curve and muscle. You’ve never had him in such a position, lying beneath you and waiting on your next move as you reach to brush your fingers across his skin. You feel his bare chest, the soft flesh beneath earning goosebumps over your own skin as you explore him. He’s still so warm, so perfect and inviting. Your thumb brushes over his nipple and suddenly he tenses beneath you.

“Is that okay?” you ask, wanting him to be comfortable just as he made you.

He nods, never pulling his eyes away from your face. “It feels nice,” he assures you, “I enjoy your hands on me. It brings me pleasure.” His words bring a grin to your lips. You continue exploring his body, running your fingers down his stomach before reaching the hem of his pants. You notice the bulge still pressing tight against the silk, making you feel flushed all over again.

“Can I touch you here?” Part of you already knows he won’t mind, but you still want to be just as careful with his body as he always was with your own.

His eyes flash for a moment, lips parting for a split-second as he blinks. “Y-Yes…” The strain in his voice speaking the word takes you by surprise. It’s the first time he’s ever responded in such a way, proving his arousal and the fact that you have him worked up.

Biting your lip, you push his pants down his hips in a slow, gentle motion. His erect length comes to attention, earning your full focus as you take in the sight of him bare for you. Your eyes scan the length, gulping at the girth and feeling so overwhelmed all in such a short time. Without a word, you reach out to wrap your fingers around him, taking a peek at his face to see his intense gaze focused on you. You watch his eyes as you drag your palm over his silky, hot flesh, noticing the way the hues melt into pink, reds, and even purples. If you didn’t know any better, you would think he was malfunctioning, but previous experiences such as your first kiss together convinces you it’s his honest way of proving how much he enjoys your touch.

“Does that feel alright?” you ask in a whisper, continuing to stroke him, motions slow and steady. All he can do is nod, and eventually he closes his eyes as his head falls back against the bed. Your heart races. You’ve never felt so in charge and so in love.

You’ve had moments in past relationships where you pleasured your partners of course, but nothing can compare to being with him. Such a new, thrilling experience to get to bring pleasure to someone you love so much, finding new ways to make him feel good.

“What if I… used my mouth?” Your pulse spikes at the question, becoming bold. Suddenly he’s tense beneath you once again. You assume the images are running through his mind before he can even answer.

“I… uh, God… yes, please.” It’s the most human reply you could imagine him having, giggling triumphantly. It’s easy to admit how good it feels to be needed, and you feel even more powerful knowing your big, strong android becomes so weak at the thought of you simply sucking him off.

“Will you watch me?”

It doesn’t take much more convincing than that. He props himself up on his elbows to get a better view just as you grip him tighter while leaning close. Your tongue flicks out first, testing the waters to gauge his reaction. His body tenses as a groan builds in his chest. He really enjoys it, you think, sending a surge of heat straight between your thighs. You don’t dare stop, meeting his eyes while you wrap your lips around him, so hard and needy and hot in your mouth, and his jaw slacks as you do so. Meanwhile, your fist around him pumps slowly, gently, allowing him to get used to the sensations, but you can tell from his creased brow and parted lips, as well as his eyes beginning to go haywire, he loves it.

It fills you with pride and your own sense of bliss. It makes you feel good to give him pleasure, beginning to lower your mouth onto his length while stroking his shaft. Simple groans turn into grunts that turn into him thrusting his hips toward you. Without you mentioning it, he reaches down to grip a fistful of your hair, causing you to whimper against his skin from the sensation.

You focus on his face while sucking him off. He never tears his eyes away from you. Groans and moans fill the space between the two of you as he watches you go down on him. You can’t put him completely in your mouth, but your tongue massages everything that will fit past your lips. A tight fist around his length takes care of the rest, stroking him, milking him close to his own bliss.

“Baby,” he groans, and the cute little pet name falling from a strained tongue sends your heart soaring. “I… I’m… overwhelmed.”

You immediately pull back. “You mean…” He’s going to “come”, of course, though you aren’t sure what that means for you. His tone would suggest his wishes for you to stop, leaving you confused considering that was the whole idea. “You want me to stop?”

“No,” he whispers, reaching to wrap fingers around your wrist and pull you closer with a gentle grasp. “I want to be inside of you.”

His words leave you breathless. You feel yourself ache with need all over again.

“Here,” he says, then reaches for the hem of your nightgown. You help him with the rest by pulling it over your head and tossing it to the floor, leaving you bare for him. His eyes scan your body. He’s seen you lots of times by now, but never in such a position. Never so close and intimate like the two of you are now. You feel warm under his gaze, but not embarrassed or shy. You feel his love as he looks at you, and when he pulls you closer to straddle his body, you feel his need, too. “You’re so beautiful.”

His words take you by surprise, but you feel the warmth swell in your cheeks. “You know what that means?” you ask, feeling silly a second later for doing so. “I mean, you know when something is beautiful?”

“I know when I look at you I don’t want to look at anything else,” he tells you honestly, making your heart flutter in your chest. “Isn’t that what you do with something beautiful?”

Your face grows warmer as you lower yourself to his body. You press your soaked folds against his arousal, watching his eyes light up while his hands fall to your hips. Though they don’t stay there long, beginning to wander and touch every inch of skin he can reach. Large palms brush over your stomach, your ribs, reaching your breasts and cupping them gently in his hands. The sensation has you whimpering, and even more so when he caresses your hardened nipple with the pad of his thumb.

You can hardly take it anymore, needing to feel him inside of you as you grip his length between your thighs. Aligning yourself against the tip, he brushes against your folds to make you whimper. Without hesitation, you begin to lower yourself onto him, easing him into your drenched heat while keeping your body relaxed. Your eyes flutter closed, pushing the head past your folds, coating his flesh with your juices from the pleasure he gave you earlier, moaning his name softly while sliding down his length.

His hands fall to your hips a moment later. His fingers dig into your flesh, holding you tight while a deep groan builds in his chest. He’s just as worked up as you and needs his own form of release. He makes it clear from the way his hips thrust into you from below ever so gently, pumping his cock deeper inside of you to make you gasp.

Then finally you’re completely wrapped around him, allowing him to fill you up while your mind grows hazy with lust. He enters you so deeply, hitting spots you weren’t even aware you had and it’s all suddenly too much too fast. You bite your lip to begin grinding yourself against him, listening to his beautiful cries of bliss while you ride him. His hands grip you even tighter, guiding your body to a pleasurable rhythm while his hips move beneath you, fucking himself into you.

“God…” All you can do is cry out, a mix of whimpers and moans, curses beneath your breath and calls of his name. He thrusts into you so deep it’s almost mind-numbing. Your body trembles on top of him. Unsteady hands fall to his stomach to support yourself, continuing to rock your hips back and forth, raising your body just a little only to sink down onto him again.

The sounds of whimpers and moans, flesh pressing to flesh, his cock pumping into your wet heat fill the room all at once. It’s too overwhelming for the both of you. You feel the heat bubbling between your thighs and though your eyes are closed so you can’t see his expression, from the way he holds you to the way he thrusts beneath you and the noises he makes, you know he is feeling the same.

Goosebumps form along heated flesh as you throw your head back, becoming lost in the pleasure of feeling him fill you up over and over. You press harder against him, rolling your hips so his cock hits the end of your channel. Over and over, just the way the two of you learned to love.

“I… I’m…” He begins to stutter, and you know he’s getting close to reaching his own end. Slowly, your eyes open as you continue to ride him. You spot his face twisted in pure pleasure, his wrinkled brow, his jaw slacked, his head thrown back. His eyes remain closed but you can only imagine the wild array of hues flashing through them.

So you push your pleasure aside for the moment to bring him closer. You focus on him, the noises he makes when you move a certain pace, the gasp he releases when you grind against him harder, faster. You keep the pace until he grips your hips so tight you wonder if it will leave a mark. It only adds to the bliss, however, loving the way he holds you tight while you ride his cock.

“Come for me,” you tell him, leaning closer to press your body into his own. Your lips fall against his. He instinctively wraps his arms around your body. You don’t slow your pace, only moving your hips back and forth, easing yourself up and down his length. You whimper into the kiss from the sensation of him hitting deep into your walls over and over, and just when you aren’t sure if you can hold off any longer, he tenses beneath you.

A wave of overwhelming emotions wash over him as he comes undone. He begins to shake, but he never releases his hold on you. He grunts and groans, eyelids fluttering, nails even digging into your skin. You continue to ride him, trying to focus on his pleasure but the feeling of him being so overwhelmed against your own body brings you closer to the edge. Knowing the pleasure he is experiencing in his own way, knowing you’re the cause of it, has the warmth surging through you.

A final gasp falls from your lips, feeling the heat spiraling uncontrollably from between your thighs. You quiver and shake, cry out that you’re coming, screwing your eyes shut and giving in to the bliss all over again. Your trembling body collapses against his own, growing too weak to hold yourself up as the pleasure rides through you. Wave after wave of pure ecstasy fills you from head to toe, making the room spin, leaving you breathless.

And finally you’re coming down right along with him. He pulls out of you but he doesn’t let you go. He keeps you tight against his chest, holding you close, caressing your back and soothing the shaking in your limbs. He kisses your forehead and a sleepy smile forms on your lips. Everything is too perfect with him. You couldn’t imagine anything better, even if you tried.

The two of you stay like that for a while longer, enjoying the feeling of each other’s bodies. Enjoying being held and taken care of, just like he always has, and just like he always will because he’s perfect for you. He was made for you, and somewhere deep down inside of you, you believe you were made for him as well. After all, you are his purpose.

#bts smut #marvel smut #call of duty smut #twilight smut #harry potter smut #jungkook smut #loki smut #nct smut #got7 smut #monsta x smut #stray kids smut #harry styles smut #ghost smut #jimin smut #taehyung smut #bts scenarios #marvel scenarios #stray kids scenarios

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fettuccinealfred0 · 4 months

Text

Til Death Do Us Part | Part 4

Series Masterlist

Astarion x f!reader, Arranged Marriage AU

Word Count: 7.6k

(CW: general vampirism, very light descriptions of injury)

Summary:

Astarion’s cold hand reaches out to catch your own as you move to drop it back to your side and he presses your palm against his cheek. His skin is like silk and you can hardly stop yourself from softly running your thumb over his beautiful cheekbone.

He leans in closer, lips just a breath away from yours. You hope he will lean down and kiss you. That he will wrap you in his arms and never let you go. You close your eyes and tilt your head up in anticipation.

Instead, you feel him pull away, your hand dropping limply back to your side. It stings your heart.

“Sleep well, wife,” Astarion says, before he’s turning on his heel and walking swiftly down the hallway.

Read on ao3 here

“What are you reading?” Astarion asks, flopping himself onto the settee next to you.

You lift the book up so he can see the cover. Bram Stroker’s Dracula. “I’m doing research on vampires.”

“Very funny,” Astarion says with a sour face. It makes you giggle as you turn back to your book.

Astarion watches you for a moment before he lets out a frustrated huff that you know is meant to draw your attention back to him.

“Why are you spending all your time surrounded by dusty old books when you could ask me, a real vampire?” He does a self-important flourish with his hand that causes you to snort out another laugh.

It seems too harsh to say ‘because I still don’t know if I can trust a word that comes out of your mouth.’ And really, you do mostly trust him now. You just can’t shake the feeling that there’s something bigger going on around here.

You see Astarion whispering with Shadowheart and Gale in dark corners. You see the weird visitors- the giant, friendly woman, the stern looking warrior-woman, and the man with two different colored eyes- that Astarion always immediately rushes into his study. You had tried listening at the door the last time they came, but you still couldn’t hear anything.

Astarion couldn’t necessarily be called paranoid because, yeah, you were listening at the door. But to be fair, his actions were definitely suspicious. And what were you supposed to do- not try to solve this puzzle which had so wonderfully presented itself to you?

“Come, little flower, ask me anything. I promise there’s plenty of juicy details that are far too scandalous for your books to mention,” Astarion lightly pulls your attention back to him when he notices you chewing on your lip as you think.

He’s hooked you there and he knows it- you never could resist the opportunity to indulge your curiosity. You curl up your feet so Astarion can settle more comfortably next to you and he slings his arm over the back of the settee. Perhaps you imagined it, but you could swear you caught his eyes darting down to your bare calf when you shifted, before you could adjust your skirts to cover yourself.

“What happens if you come into contact with garlic?”

“Aside from bad breath?” Astarion wrinkles his nose. “It’s not deadly or anything, it just reeks. No sane vampire would ever go near the stuff.”

“What about silver?”

“A very pretty metal, though I’m partial to gold,” He answers, gesturing down to his waistcoat, which is made of a shimmery golden silk with swirling floral patterns. Your husband never was one for minimalism.

“What about running water?” You ask, practically having to rip your eyes away from his waistcoat. For under his waistcoat, lay his chest. And the idea of that lovely expanse of alabaster skin had quickly become an image which plagued you in the dark of night.

“Should I be growing concerned about this line of questioning? You seem to only want to know about things that can harm me. I thought your questions would be much more fun.”

You smirk at him. “Please. If I wanted to hurt you, I already would have.”

“Oh, I don’t doubt that at all, you feisty little devil,” Astarion says with a wicked grin. His red eyes flicker dangerously, like fire. “As for running water- I do love a bath. Though, it would be all the more delightful if you decided to join me. I could make it… very worth your while.”

His eyes rake over you and you struggle in vain to ignore the familiar flames of heat licking at your cheeks. You can’t decide if the cause is embarrassment or arousal, or both.

“Do you remember what color your eyes were?” You ask, figuring you’ve teased him enough with your initial questions.. Astarion looks genuinely shocked for a moment before his forehead creases a bit. “You know, I’m not sure I do. It’s been so long.”

“How long?” you ask cautiously, like you’re approaching a wild animal. You expect him to skitter away at this line of questioning. Astarion doesn’t like deeply personal questions. He likes wordplay and teasing and, occasionally, dropping the odd fact about himself if you listened closely enough.

“A couple hundred years,” he answers. It breaks your heart to hear that. To know he’s spent so long like this. He couldn’t have been older than his thirties when he was turned, which means he had been a vampire many lifetimes longer than he was alive. Does he even remember what it was like?

“I think they were gray. Or maybe green?” Astarion is still thinking, lost in his own little world. He sits for another moment. “Whatever. You have to admit that the red suits me, doesn’t it, darling?”

He shoots you a wink, said red eyes glinting playfully. You almost have whiplash from how quickly he was able to fall back into his flirtatious performance. By now, you have spent enough time with Astarion to know this act is what he reverts back to when he wants to reestablish control in a conversation, when he wants to stop himself from settling into uncomfortable emotions.

“Your eyes were blue,” you tell him and he looks at you warily. “I ran across the portrait of your family one day. You looked so much like your mother.”

You don’t tell him of all the hours you had spent studying the painting, turning the image over and over in your mind trying to figure out how this piece fit into the puzzle.

“Why would you tell me that?”

And to your surprise, he’s angry at your words. You note this reaction in your mind- that bringing up his past will warrant anger and leave you without any useful information.

“So you could reclaim a part of yourself that was either stolen from you or that you forgot,” you say softly. Astarion’s eyebrows bunch together and he looks deep in thought. It’s making the room too heavy, his thoughts seem too dark.

“How were you turned?” You ask, trying to distract him while also trying to get more of your questions answered.

When he speaks, his tone seems too measured, too rehearsed. “Someone is turned when a vampire drains them dry and buries their body. It’s a rite of passage to dig yourself out of your grave. Of course, the body has to be buried almost immediately or the ritual won’t work and the person will just be dead. It’s a… delicate balance.”

He technically did answer your question, but the story of his turning is noticeably missing.

“Have you ever turned someone?”

“No, I didn’t have that ability for a long time. And now, I don’t really care to.” He’s trying to feign nonchalance, but you see the way his fist is clenched so tightly in his lap that his nails are digging painfully into his palms. He’s hiding something.

“But you’re a vampire?” Your own brow furrows in confusion, because it doesn’t make sense that he would be a vampire but not be able to turn someone.

“Am I?” Astarion asks sarcastically, examining his skin. “I hadn’t noticed. Thank you for that astute observation.”

You nudge him with your foot. “You know what I meant.”

“Yes, but it’s just so fun to tease you, pet. I simply can’t resist.”

He’s trying to get himself out of this line of questioning by baiting you with teasing. But the way he’s still holding his shoulders so tightly, you know there’s still valuable information to be gained.

“So, you’re not a ‘real’ vampire?” you ask again, trying to coax him back on track.

“Now I am.” Astarion takes a deep breath in and out. “For a long time, I was just a vampire spawn.”

“How’s that any different?” You had read a bit about vampires and vampire spawn while doing your vampire research in the library, but the accounts were so varied that it was hard to discern what was true or false. From what you could gather, a vampire spawn serves a vampire lord. And it is rather strange that Astarion doesn’t seem to have any running around the manor.

Astarion is still quiet, so you rephrase the question. “What’s the story behind how you were turned, then?”

“I’m not going to answer that,” Astarion finally snaps, shooting you a glare.

“You said I could ask you anything.” You remind him, sure to keep your tone calm and measured.

“I said you could ask, I didn’t say that I would answer,” he says through gritted teeth. He’s so tense, jaw tight and shoulders nearly up to his ears.

You pout and he softens a bit, lowering his arm from the back of the settee to graze his fingertips gently over the back of your hand.

“There are some stories that only serve to harm when they are told, little flower,” he says quietly and the pained look on his face sends a twinge to your heart that makes you drop the subject entirely.

In moments like this, you must remind yourself that his beauty is a shield- a defense mechanism meant to amplify his pain and provoke a response from you. Even though you are aware of this, the way Astarion looks when he’s in pain has you nearly falling to your knees and begging forgiveness for ever daring to hurt him..

“What happens if you drink the blood of someone who’s drunk?” you ask, trying to lighten the mood after the heavy turn.

You know he’ll welcome a silly question like that. And the radiant smile that lights up Astarion’s face is worth dropping your real line of question. You could ask another time. Right now, you would do just about anything to keep him smiling like this in front of you.

“Darling, I thought you’d never ask! You can get drunk from them, but you have to drink a lot and the effects fade far too quickly. I much prefer wine for a quick buzz.”

“Makes sense with that cellar I found downstairs,” you tease. Though, cellar was a bit of an understatement. Grand network of caverns filled with more wine than you could ever conceive of existing was a more apt description.

“Darling, you should know by now that I collect and cherish the things I enjoy,” Astarion says in a deep, husky voice, eyes looking up at you sinfully from underneath his pale lashes.

The image of him cherishing you fills your mind and sets your face aflame. It would be so easy for his hand to reach out, to tilt your chin up and present your face to his. All he would have to do is lean over, just a little bit closer, and his pretty pink lips would press against yours. They would be soft and cool against your burning skin.

No. Stay focused. This was the time for getting some much needed answers out of Astarion, not the time for silly romantic fantasies.

“Do you like being a vampire?” you ask after clearing your throat. You take great care to keep your voice as calm as possible, afraid you might again be leading Astarion into tumultuous waters.

Astarion takes a moment before he speaks and you can watch his thoughts play out on his face. The slight frown when he first processes your question, the way his eyes dart around the room as if he will think up some witty response to distract you, the gentle furrow in his brow as he tries to think of a genuine response.

“I honestly don’t know how to answer that.” He’s trying hard to keep his own voice measured and controlled when he speaks. “It’s… complicated. I certainly don’t regret being turned. Not anymore, at least.”

Not anymore. So, he did regret being turned at some point. But why? What horrors has he witnessed that were so unspeakable? Was his turning really that traumatic?

Perhaps he had been in a war? You had read many stories that portrayed war as the worst of what humanity could do to one another. But no, that’s ridiculous. Astarion is nobility, he practiced law. And Astarion isn’t the type to involve himself in other’s petty squabbles, anyway.

But the faraway, pained look in Astarion’s eye has you thinking that whatever he had suffered must have been akin to the worst of war.

“Would you ever want to be a vampire?” He surprises you by turning the question back on you. You curl your arms around your knees, pulling them closer to your chest. Your reaction isn’t an immediate no, which surprises you a bit.

“I don’t know. Depends on the circumstances, I think,” you tell him.

What you really mean is that it depends on if eternity would look like this. If eternity would involve reading in the gardens or Astarion and you sitting next to each other on a settee and talking. Those might be terms you could agree to.

“I think I would really miss the sunlight,” you give Astarion a sad smile.

No sunlight means no gardens during the day, no talking strolls in the forest, no swimming in a river and sunbathing on a rock to dry yourself off. The life of a vampire is cold and dark and lonely. Only, maybe it wouldn’t be quite so lonely for you?

“A small price to pay for eternal life,” Astarion says with what you have come to understand is his hollow performance voice. Meant to dazzle an audience and distract people from the fact that his real feelings contradict what he is saying.

You watch him carefully as he settles deeper into the couch, crossing his arms over his chest and attempting to tamper whatever melancholy had been brewing inside him.

“Come on then, darling, read to me,” he says, giving you a wicked grin, “I can tell you what they got wrong in your little book.”

You read aloud and Astarion chimes in with little quips like ‘that’s not right,’ and ‘what do you think about me taking two more brides like this Dracula fellow, pet?’ and ‘good gods, just skip over the parts about Renfield, he’s a disgusting, pathetic character.’

But as you continue to read, Astarion slowly lets his head rest against the back of the couch and his eyes grow heavy before they eventually fall closed. The frequency of his interruptions slows until he’s just giving little hums of acknowledgement when you read something especially shocking or profound.

When you make it over two pages without a single interruption, you pause to look over at him. His deep, even breaths lead you to think he might have fallen asleep. With a smile, you turn back to the book and keep reading, perfectly content to never let this moment end, even if the number of remaining pages was starting to dwindle.

—---------

The longer you spent around Astarion, the more you realize that he did occasionally sprinkle the truth into his words- for even the best charlatans use truth to make their facades seem more real. Astarion wasn’t unique in that regard.

As such, you were determined to find the flakes of truth in Astarion’s story, determined to piece together the puzzle of the man you called your husband. It would be your most challenging and most rewarding prize yet.

So, you study him. You watch and you learn every tiny expression on his face. Astarion might be a masterful performer, but there were involuntary reactions even he could not control- a slight furrow of the brow, an inhale, a twitch at the corner of his mouth. And sometimes, there were flashes of something in his eyes- joy, wonder, terror, despair- so quick that a lesser trained eye might have missed them completely.

You notice these details because they are important to your cause. And yet, they stick around in your head for hours, repeating like some terribly wonderful time loop.

And you find yourself craving his company. You tell yourself that it’s not because you particularly enjoy his presence, but because every interaction gives you more information, gets you one step closer to discovering the truth beneath the mask. And yes, he was beautiful and wonderful to look at, but you only gazed upon him so often because you were collecting valuable data.

Though… it was remarkable how he seemingly had no bad angles. How the candlelight bent to his whim, following him around and dancing against his skin.

And gods damn him, Astarion can be funny, when he wants to be. He’s well-read and full of little tales and salacious secrets about the other nobles and their ancestors. In another life, you would have thought the gods crafted him especially for you- your perfect conversation partner.

Although Astarion will never love you, never desire you in the way that you secretly know you will always want him, you think he has come to find some enjoyment in your companionship, too. Some of his smiles seem a bit too real, some of his laughs a little too wild to be rehearsed. You imagine he regards you as a sort of… pet. Or, if you really dare to dream, perhaps a friend.

You must constantly remind yourself that his flirtations are empty, practiced phrases that are meant to disarm you. They do not show you he cares for you or that he wants you. You try to ignore that deep, viscous part of you that calls out to him, that wants him to think of you fondly, that hopes that you are driving him as mad with your presence as he drives you.

Over the past month, you’ve become semi-nocturnal. You find Astarion is much more active once the sun has gone down and the later you stay awake, the more time you get to spend with him. It’s unsettling how naturally your life seems to shift to accommodate him.

When you do make your way out to the garden in the late afternoons, Halsin happily congratulates you in his friendly, over-the-top way on the state of your marriage and how you and Astarion have managed to grow together despite your initial difficulties. You know he means it sincerely, but the words leave you a stuttering, embarrassed mess. You didn’t think you were being so obvious about your growing… affection for Astarion.

So, you start reading in the library more often than the garden, now that the air has started to turn crisp in the autumn nights.

Or at least, you’ve convinced yourself that’s the reason why and not because you secretly hope that Astarion will come join you.

And he does join you, some days. He’ll stride in with a book or some papers and take up residence on the couch across from you. On the really good days, he’ll sit on the couch beside you and ask you to read aloud and you get to lean against him while you read to him.

Tonight, he decided to accompany you to the library after dinner. He’s sitting in a chair across from your favorite settee and he’s only wearing a flowing white shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. You keep sneaking peeks up at him, mesmerized by the blue veins in his arms and how the lean muscles move when he turns a page. You’re trying really hard to be subtle- only letting yourself glance up for a moment every couple of minutes.

But, gods, it’s so difficult to focus on the words in front of you with that expanse of skin teasing you.

“You haven’t turned a page in a very long time, darling,” Astarion says without even looking up from his own book.

“And how attentive are you to your own reading if you’ve been listening for me to turn the page?” You shoot back.

“Oh, I’ve been finished for ages. I just couldn’t stand to leave you.” He gives you that devilish, tantalizing grin where one corner of his mouth curves up more than the other. It sends your heart fluttering like a hummingbird in your chest.

“Well,” you sigh, shutting your book and attempting to act casual, as if your formerly self-declared enemy hadn’t just caught you gawking at his forearms. “I suppose I’m not going to get any more of this finished tonight.”

“I apologize, I know my presence is entirely too distracting,” Astarion says, and the arrogant look on his face makes you roll your eyes. He’s not wrong, but he'd be entirely too pleased with himself the rest of the evening if you admitted it out loud.

“Yes, how does anyone get anything done with you around?” you say sarcastically instead.

“I haven’t the faintest idea how,” Astarion lets out a suffering sigh, as if his beauty is too much for the world to handle (it is). You can’t let yourself think about it too long or you’ll devolve in idle fantasies about what it might feel like to trace those beautiful veins in his arms all the way up to his chest.

You snap your book shut, “Want to join me on a walk around the gardens?”

You need to get out of here, where the stifling air and Astarion’s flowy white shirt are clouding your mind. But you don’t want this night to end yet. Not just yet. In truth, you gladly and greedily take as much time as Astarion’s willing to give you.

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be in the world.”

He says it with that easy, flirtatious tone and you know he probably doesn’t really mean it. But that deep part of you that feeds on Astarion’s praise still preens.

The cool air is refreshing when you step outside and your head finally begins to clear. Astarion holds his arm out for you and you let your fingers brush against the skin of his forearm as you tuck yourself into his side.

When you turn to look at him, he’s practically luminescent. The moonlight was made for him, bouncing off his white curls and casting a gentle glow over his pale skin. As the moon reflected the sun’s light, Astarion seemed to reflect the moon’s. You were simply lucky to bask in his presence.

Arm in arm, you wander through the garden, pointing out your favorite flowers to Astarion and checking in on the blooms. It’s reached that part of autumn where some perennials have started to sleep, ready to reawaken in the spring. The sunflowers, always one of your favorites, are drooping for the night, waiting to chase after the sun again tomorrow, and you frown a bit when you see them.

“It’s a shame you never get to see the gardens during the day. The colors, the blooming flowers. It’s truly one of the most remarkable things I’ve ever seen in my life,” you say, as you and Astarion move into the rose garden. Everything new you find out about vampirism makes it sound like an isolating, dreary existence. You make a mental note that Astarion could use some cut flowers in his study every now and then, though it feels like a poor substitute for the splendor of the full gardens.

Because it is your mission to study Astarion, you don’t miss the fleeting, pained look that passes over his face, the look he always gets when you dig a bit too close to a truth he’d rather keep buried.

You used to push him on these, but you quickly found that got you nowhere. No, Astarion responded far better to a gentle touch rather than provocation and name calling. You were coming to realize that he would tell you in time, in his own way. And you had started to find that you didn’t mind waiting for answers if it kept you in his company that much longer.

And oh, how rewarding those answers were when he gifted them to you in the dark of the night, offering up little pieces of himself like Tara delivering you a dead mouse.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be prattling on- '' you try to backtrack, to apologize for the sadness that you have caused to enter his eyes.

You sometimes wonder what his eyes would look like if they were still blue- would they be pale blue like soft ocean waves or rich and deep like the blue flowers in the garden?

With his red eyes in front of you, his sadness is akin to pain, all blood and gore and unspoken horrors. No, you decide, if Astarion had blue eyes they must look like dark rain clouds when he is sad. For if Astarion weeped, would the heavens themselves not cry for him?

“Nonsense,” Astarion cuts you off and you’re acutely aware of how your husband has been studying you just as intently as you were watching him. Admittedly, the two of you were remarkably similar underneath it all. All sharp teeth and claws masking scared and fragile hearts.

He gives your hand a little squeeze where it rests on his forearm. “It’s wonderful to see the world through your eyes.”

He says it so casually, like he hasn’t caused your knees to buckle and your soul to leave your body. Occasionally, he slips in sentiments like that, with no regard for your poor heart. You’re dangerously close to having hope that he actually means them.

But no, you remind yourself. There was no way Astarion’s words could be trusted. He said things, he did things to get a reaction out of you because he grew bored and because he knew how badly you wanted him, how badly everyone wanted him. There was no reason to hope. He had entertained you at the ball because he was hungry, he had married you to tie up loose ends, and he spent time with you now because he had very little other company up here in his lonely manor.

You do not mean as much to him as he does to you.

You distract yourself from that thought spiral by talking, amazed at how easy and willing you are to offer up information to him now, “I used to have a book with flowers drawn in it as a little girl that I would stare at all day. There were so many that I’d never thought I’d get to see in real life, until I came here. And there were some flowers that I didn’t even know existed until I saw them here for the first time. These gardens are everything I could have ever dreamed of.”

Astarion gives you a smile that lights up his whole face and he seems so proud, like the whole purpose of his life is to make you happy. Your heart sings again and you shush her immediately.

Astarion’s beauty was not something you would ever grow used to. And in the lighting tonight, his profile sent a cold shock through your body. You had never felt so alive. You had never yearned for death more.

“My mother used to love the gardens here. She used to always try to get me to help her plant things. I wish…” He trails off, reaching out to stroke a delicate rose petal with his fingers. “Well, I wish I would have appreciated that more when I was younger. You never realize as a child how precious those memories will one day become.”

“And I wish you could have seen it then,” he says, letting out a wistful sigh. “You would have loved it. The gardens were even grander and more vast than what they are now. When I returned, they were in such disrepair that it pained me to look at them for ages. I hired Halsin to help restore them and he did a wonderful job, of course, but it’s just…”

He continues to stare at the flower he holds in his hand, unable to find the words to finish his sentence.

“Not the same?” you complete the thought for him and he nods.

And although his words fill you with a deep sadness, you rejoice for a moment. Astarion offers up information about himself so rarely that his words tonight are practically a feast. You tuck away that little piece of his backstory in your mind to analyze later. Though, as usual, he leaves you with more questions than answers.

Where had he returned from? Where was it that he had spent most of his vampiric life? And you still don’t know the circumstances of how he was turned into a vampire or how that plays into creating the man standing before you.

You let your fingers rub in circles against his forearm as you think.

Astarion’s rests his hand over yours. “Your hands are cold, little flower. And we both know a pretty thing like you blooms better in the daytime. I think it’s time to get you back inside.”

You try to protest but a yawn escapes you and Astarion gives you a knowing look that forces you to roll your eyes and allow him to start guiding you back toward the manor. His footsteps are slow, as if he’s trying to prolong your time together.

“Thank you, Astarion,” you say quietly, when you reach your room.

Facing him, the low, flowing neckline on his shirt has the lines of his collarbone perfectly in your sight and you’re scared you won’t be able to resist reaching out and touching them if you have to look at that for much longer.

Astarion seems unable to resist touching you, either, and his hand reaches out to tug on the chain of your necklace which holds your wedding ring. It must have snaked its way out from under the collar of your dress at some point during the night. He rolls the gold band between his fingers, his expression unreadable.

“You’re wearing your ring,” Astarion states the obvious, his voice low and husky with some emotion you can’t decipher.

“Yes,” you whisper. It’s not embarrassing, per say, but it does feel a bit like Astarion has broken his way past your ribcage and is staring directly at your beating heart.

“When did you start doing that?”

He tilts his head and one, single white curl dislodges itself from his meticulously styled hair. You watch it fall gently, like a feather floating through the air.

“About a week after…” you trail off. It was still weird to admit it out loud. About a week after you were married. It had been a couple months since that day and everything after has felt like a feverish dream.

You can’t focus when Astarion is looking at you like this- eyes all warm and rich and red like the fading embers of a fire. And the loose curl that caresses the skin of his ear is just taunting you so sweetly. Your hand moves almost of its own accord, reaching out to brush it back into place and ghosting over the shell of Astarion’s ear. You catch his slight shiver.

Instead, you feel him pull away, your hand dropping limply back to your side. It stings your heart.

“Sleep well, wife,” Astarion says, before he’s turning on his heel and walking swiftly down the hallway.

Wife.

He called you that so rarely and combined with the rosemary and bergamot lingering in the air after him, you feel a bit dizzy.

Oh, it’s the first time he’s called you that without a hint of teasing or sarcasm. No, tonight he said it almost with reverence- as if you were a gift to him. He had said it like a true husband might. That silly sense of hope thrums again in your veins.

But hope for what? That this marriage built on deception and hatred might turn itself around into something based in love? You chastise yourself for feeding into girlish fantasies. You needed to stop reading so many romance books.

No, you were just relieved that Astarion and you had managed to grow into something that could be considered a friendship. That he respected you enough to give you back the control that so many husbands wielded viciously over their wives. You were content since you were safe, and never pressured into uncomfortable circumstances, and spent your days doing whatever you wished.

You did not really want Astarion to kiss you.

It is the baser, lonely part of you that wants him to kiss you, that wants to hold him, that cries out for his touch. You would want to kiss anyone after taking a midnight stroll in a romantic garden. Astarion just happened to make it especially confusing by being the most beautiful man in the world.

And yet, you still yearn for his attention, you long for his smiles like a flower chases after the sun. And was his smile not capable of rivaling the sun? The pure joy, the pure energy surging beneath the surface.

No, when Astarion smiled, the sun itself bowed her head in surrender to his beauty.

—------------------

Gale might have been right, though you were loath to admit it.

You really did have a hard time sitting still for your portrait. It was only a couple hours each day in the afternoon, but all the sitting and doing nothing felt like torture. You could have done it if you had been allowed a book, but the stupid artist needed to be able to see your stupid face.

On the second afternoon, Astarion wanders in, inspecting the painting critically, eyes narrowed and a hand held up to his chin as he scrutinizes it.

“The shade of her eyes is all wrong,” he finally says with a displeased frown.

“I’m sorry, my lord, the painting isn’t finished yet.” The artist attempts to defend himself but you can tell he quickly sets to work correcting the ‘mistake.’

Astarion comes in the next day, and the next, and the next and just watches over the artist’s shoulder. The poor man is sweating so bad he’s creating a small puddle on the floor. It’s rather amusing. You have to refrain from laughing the whole time.

The man can’t seem to be able to paint a single detail without Astarion critiquing his choices and giving corrections. It’s a flurry of ‘see how her mouth moves up in the corner when she smiles,’ and ‘no, look again at how the candlelight moves against her skin,’ and ‘her hair doesn’t curl around her face like that, you’ve made her look like a poodle.’

You’ve come to think that Gale was wrong and perhaps Astarion is the worst kind of fine art snob who believes they could do everything better than the actual artists. And granted, he probably could- Astarion was also the annoying type of person who was preternaturally gifted at everything they tried.

When Astarion finally deigns the painting satisfactory after many, many days of nit-picking, you’re allowed to see the final product. It truly is a marvelous piece. You are sure you have never looked more beautiful- not even at the ball where you met Astarion or on your wedding night. No, in this painting, you can only be described as ethereal, a small scrap of the heavens that created Astarion.

It feels as if you are seeing yourself anew, through the eyes of someone who loves you.

“I expect nothing less than perfection when it comes to you, my love,” Astarion says, a gentle hand on your waist as he stands behind you and keenly observes your reaction.

But the painting is not what has pulled the air from your lungs.

My Love.

That's new. In your time as a married woman, you had grown accustomed to the endearments that Astarion loved to dole out and had deciphered his uses for each. He seemed to have a personal vendetta against calling you by your name.

Darling was for emphasis and dramatic effect. Dearest was a bit sarcastic and typically saved for use around others. Pet was for when he really wanted to be a condescending asshole or a teasing little shit.

Little flower was perhaps the closest thing to a real endearment that Astarion had in his vocabulary, saved for the soft moments when the mood between the two of you could perhaps be considered friendly.

But my love was unprecedented, uncharted territory.

And with the way Astarion is looking at you, with eyes so open that his soul is practically bleeding out of them, you wonder if for the first time he actually means what he is saying. That maybe some part of his heart does hold affection for you. It seems impossible.

He spends the rest of the evening peppering darlings and my dears in nearly every sentence, like he’s overcompensating for the slip up earlier.

Your portrait is hung next to his in the gallery. And you do have to admit that the two of you look wonderful together.

—----------------------

You don’t like when Astarion leaves on trips. Especially since he never wants to take you with him. Apparently, you had annoyed Astarion so much about the issue that he now resorted to not even telling you when he was going to leave.

Instead, you awoke one afternoon to Shadowheart informing you that he was away on business for the next few days. You’re fairly certain he’s lying- that whatever he’s out doing involved those maps and papers you found on his desk when you had broken into his study.

You’re a bit peeved that he didn’t even bother to leave you a goodbye note but mostly, you want him to come back.

You know he will arrive home with a flourish and an extravagant gift. His last trips had awarded you with a lovely new silk dress, a newly released book, and a tiara, of all things. Out of the three, the book was the only item that was really useful and you had spent a few nights reading it to Astarion while his head rested in your lap. Though, you did wear the dress and tiara to dinner after you had received each and the pleased mood it put Astarion in was worth dressing up for no reason.

This time, Astarion has been gone for two days and you feel as if you are going to lose your mind with how desperately you need him to come back.

You’re pacing the length of the drawing room, working your lip between your teeth and focusing on how you want Astarion back so you can yell at him for leaving without telling you and not because you miss the little grins he gives you when you see him in the hallway. Or the way he’s started tracing patterns on the inside of your palm when you sit together after you read. Or how he sometimes stares at you with such awe you feel as though he is looking at your very soul.

You do not miss Astarion. It just… feels wrong when he isn’t around.

You’re still pacing and deeply rationalizing how much you definitely do not miss him when you hear the front door open. Your body begins moving before your brain could even register what you were doing.

The sight before you is a nightmare. Astarion’s arm is wrapped around a woman’s shoulder and she’s supporting most of his weight as she drags him through the door. You recognize her instantly due to her imposing frame. You had seen her around the manor from time to time when she would visit for those secret meetings that she, and the mean-looking woman, and two-color eyed man had with Astarion.

She had always been kind to you when you had seen her around, always quick to offer up a smile. But not now. Her forehead is creased deeply with worry and you faintly register her yelling for help over the ringing in your ears.

Astarion looks bad, which is a word you never thought could be used to describe him. His skin is already so pale, but now, he looks nearly white and there’s blood splattered across his face. His free hand is clutching at his side in a way that implies he’s been badly wounded.

You’re frozen in fear. What could you possibly do to help?

Shadowheart, who must have been on her way to bring you tea as you paced, immediately shoves the tray onto the first surface she can find.

“What happened?” Her voice is grim and she’s rushing forward, helping to support Astarion’s weight on the other side. He lets out a pitiful groan of pain as they settle him on a couch.

“Got ambushed on the way back. Too many of them, we couldn’t fight them off,” the tall woman answers.

But her explanation seems… off. Astarion’s carriage is grand, sure, and robbers like to target the wealthy, especially in the dead of night. But you had a hard time believing this woman would be incapable of fighting off a couple street thugs. An attack that would warrant this level of injury seems much more organized.

No. Something else is going on. What sort of business was Astarion tangled up in?

Shadowheart is a blur as she bustles around, collecting herbs, cloth bandages, and a needle and thread. You never knew she was a healer. Was everyone around here keeping secrets from you?

And you’re just standing there, uselessly, incapable of doing anything other than watch as your own heart bleeds out in front of you.

Your feet do manage to carry you to Astarion’s side and you try to stay out of Shadowheart’s way as she works, but all you want right now is to pull him into your arms and soothe the pain on his face.

“Astarion?” you call his name, your shaky hand reaching out to move a stray curl away from his face. It looks all wrong- his white hair drenched with red blood. His eyes crack open and a dreamy smile spreads across his face when he sees you.

“Come to grace your dying husband with a kiss, sweet wife?” Astarion’s eyes are hazy, but you can still detect a teasing sparkle in them. You’re relieved for a moment, because his condition surely can’t be that bad if he’s still managing to tease you.

You let out a laugh. “Leave it to you to be flirting on your deathbed.”

Shadowheart’s worried voice breaks you out of your momentary comfort. “He needs blood, desperately.”

“We need to get someone from the village,” you say, making a motion to get up and go call for someone, but Astarion’s hand is wrapping gently around your wrist. His grip is worryingly loose and you can tell it’s all the strength he’s able to muster right now.

“Not enough time,” Shadowheart shakes her head. Her voice is fraught with anxiety and it sends a needle of ice through you. Shadowheart didn’t scare easily. “He needs blood now.”

“Can you?” you ask and she shakes her head again.

“My blood’s no good and neither is Karlach’s,” Shadowheart nods her chin up at the tall woman.

“Is there anyone here who can give him blood?” You cry out. Someone had to be able to help- Gale, Halsin, another servant.

“Just you.”

When you look down at Astarion, there’s a cold hand squeezing at your heart and you realize that you don’t have a choice. You grab the dagger that’s strapped to Astarion’s belt- which, why did he have a dagger if he was going on a normal business trip? You glide the sharp edge along your palm, ignoring the sting of pain as you cut it open.

His eyes are closed as you squeeze your palm shut to help the blood pool and drip onto his lips. Almost immediately, his eyes are shooting open and he’s dragging your palm to his mouth.

It’s obscene to watch him- he lets out a groan as his soft tongue swirls and sucks against your skin. In another time, in another circumstance, there would be that familiar desire pooling deep within you as you watched him.

Suddenly, the idea of Astarion drinking anyone else’s blood ever again fills you with a jealousy so deep that you’re scared of what you might do if you get your hands on that unlucky soul.

A bit of color returns to his face and he presses a gentle kiss to the inside of your wrist, seemingly as thanks. Later that night, as you sit at his bedside as he recovers, you’ll be pressing your own lips to the same spot, as if that silly act could imitate the feel of his lips against your own.

Astarion’s eyes are still hazy and unfocused as he purrs, “Delicious, of course. I can only think of one other way I could devour you that would be better than that.”

The fact that he loses consciousness immediately after saying that probably has the opposite effect than he intended. You’ll have to tease him about that after he wakes up. And he will wake up. Because you can’t bear with the thought of a life without him.

---------------

Notes:

Okay, I fully recognize that Dracula didn't come out until 1897 and I did say this was a regency AU, but we are simply ignoring inconvenient facts for the sake of a bad joke. Sorry, I get make to the rules around here!

This chapter was so much fun to write because I'm a slut for yearning but I can't even describe how excited I am to share chapter 5 next week!!!!!! It's a doozy! We finally get a peak into Astarion's smooth little brain and well… I did promise eventual smut. I hope you all know how much I appreciate everyone who reads this little story and I hope everyone is having as much fun with this as I am!

As always, thanks to AliensNSuch on ao3 for beta-reading! She is my live studio audience cheering in the comments of the absurdly long google doc where I keep this fic and, for that, I love her.

Taglist: @idkbrodontaskme @ayselluna @maruichio @fanfic-share

Just let me know in the comments or by shooting me a message if you would like to be added/removed from the taglist!

#astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #bg3 #bg3 fanfic #bg3 fanfiction #astarion bg3 #astarion ancunin #x reader #baldurs gate 3 fanfiction #baldurs gate 3 #til death do us part

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word-wytch · 1 year

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Don't Stand So Close To Me — Chapter 11

Eddie x Teacher!Reader

Chapter 11/? 5.2k. Series Masterlist

✏︎ Parent teacher conferences and long forgotten stories uncover worlds beneath.

✏︎ Series Summary: Forced to move back home to Hawkins after your fiancé cheats on you, you begin to fall in love again with an audacious 20 year old metalhead, only there’s one problem — he’s still in high school and you’re his English teacher.

While you struggle starting over in a place you never thought you would return, Eddie struggles feeling stuck in a place he can’t manage to leave — until you offer to help him. Of all the lessons learned, the most important are the ones you teach each other.

✏︎ Series CW: forbidden romance, slow burn, true love, smut (18+ mdni), internal conflict, student-teacher relationship, 10 year age gap, mutual pining, sexual tension, emotions, drama, angst, character development, happy ending :)

Chapter warnings: stories within stories, high fantasy, discussion of childhood hardship, implied spousal abuse, parent death mention, drug use mention, heavy angst

Friday, November 15th 1985

Eddie was lost in another world.

He was floating actually. High above the clouds, not that he could see them. He wished he could but the empty crate he had stolen away in was the only thing shielding him from the suspicious eyes of the merchants aboard the zeppelin. His heart pounded as the wind carried him further than he’d ever been from the only place he’d ever known — the isolated Cloud Kingdom of Myrne. High atop a mountain range. A city of gold, gleaming like a beacon in the sun.

His back ached against the stiff wood rocking him like a cradle. He was lucky to be small enough to fit. Lucky that he had just enough space to shed his silk coat to use as padding. If he laid just right he could even stretch his legs toward the ceiling to relieve the cramps that threatened his claves.

He would have to ration the dried boar’s meat and meager flask of water that he’d stashed away in his knapsack. There wasn’t space for very much, and he needed the precious real estate for not only clothing, but the jars of herbs and poultices to stave off the illnesses he was so susceptible to.

That was why he — or, Lady Cybelle rather, ended up here in the first place. See, there was something she needed from the world beneath. Desperately. Her brother did anyway. A rare, translucent plant called a ghostfern found only in the depths of certain caves. It was a known cure for his equally rare illness, or at least that’s what she read during her herbalism studies. Much like Eddie, all she knew of the world beneath was what she read about.

Cybelle begged the high council to send for it. To send scouts to collect it. But they refused, unwilling to risk the safety of the collective for the life of just one. There was always a risk involved in the leaving and returning of Myrnish people. A risk to contract and spread more illness that threatened the lives of them all.

Cybelle was crafty though, and equally determined. She’d fashioned a mask out of moth silk with a pocket for illness-staving herbs. She would need it when the zeppelin finally landed in Torgaard. When she figured her way out of this crate without being spotted. When she set foot, for the first time, on the land she only caught a glimpse of when the clouds beneath her parted.

Eddie had grown rather fond of Cybelle. He’d been spending every evening with her since Wednesday. Ever since you handed him your world in a black three ring binder — Worlds Beneath.

It was intimate, reading your work. As if he could read between the lines and observe the way your mind worked. The way your phrasing flowed. Your choice of words. As if part of you was there within the pages. The hidden part of you.

He didn’t know what he was expecting, but he was as captivated as he was impressed. He supposed after watching you analyze literature on a daily basis that it would be more… literary. More serious. Less fantastical. But this was beyond anything he could have anticipated.

There was a secret world in you. He would catch glimpses of it sometimes when you laughed. It would peek around the mask you wore like a curious child when he talked about elves and magic. He could hear its quiet voice becoming braver.

He was there now, inside of it. Crammed inside a crate aboard a zeppelin. You had a way of doing that, he noticed. Taking him there. Making him feel the wooden crate against his spine. The stuffy air in the close darkness around him. The fear twinged with excitement. It was a sort of magic you possessed.

He could feel it outside the pages too. The gentle burning in your fingertips, even when you pulled away. Especially when you pulled away. The quiet wanting of it all.

He wondered how often you went there, to the secret world in you. Did you drift there as you glided down the hallway? Would you hide there when the real world was too much?

He wondered how many people saw it. How many others you let in.

He wondered if he stayed there long enough, set up camp and looked around, if he would find himself there too.

______

You fixed your hair as you checked your reflection in the faculty bathroom mirror. The old light bathed everything in a yellow wash. It made your skin look as tired as you felt. You picked lint off the black blazer you pulled from the back of your closet this morning. The one with the shoulder pads. Professional, right? It made you look bigger than you felt. Perhaps parents would take you seriously if you looked like you belonged behind the desk.

There were some perks to in-service days. No classroom to manage. You got to come in at noon instead of 7:30 am. Got to be the one listening to a lecture instead of giving one. The only downside was having to stay until 7:30 pm. That and trying your best not to cry when a parent inevitably got defensive. You always looked for something nice to say about all of your students. It softened the less savory news, if there was any. More often than not it was just making small talk, telling parents what a pleasure their child was to have in class.

The heels of your shoes clicked down the empty hallway, past the trophy cases filled with plaques of names you still recognized. You caught the ghost of your reflection in the glass, the angular silhouette of the costume that you wore. You noticed your tight pencil skirt riding up in the back and you corrected it with a downward tug, keeping on the straight and narrow path toward the teachers lounge.

The wood paneled walls welcomed you in, and you padded across the old carpet toward the open boxes of pizza laid out on one of the three round tables. You grabbed a paper plate and pulled a few slices of pepperoni from the large, square cut sheet, the cheese already hard from sitting out. You rarely complained, and this time was no exception. Your stomach was threatening to eat itself and lukewarm pizza more than fit the bill.

You took a bite to satiate your blood sugar and made your way to the coffee station for the third time that day. Grabbing a mug from the stack, your fingers grazed the faded lettering that vaguely resembled the Chief’s Auto Repairs logo. You glanced at the clock as you filled it with your liquid vice. It was 2:37, which meant you had approximately twenty-three minutes before you had to be posted at your station. Your stomach churned, and not from the pizza.

“Boo,” came a gentle whisper from behind you.

Your hand jerked, sloshing coffee all over the wood veneer.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry,” Diane apologized, making haste to grab a generous handful of square napkins from beside the sugar. Her bright red nail polish glinted under the fluorescents as she blotted up the mess.

You put a hand to your chest. “No, no it’s ok,” you sighed, grabbing a napkin to wipe the bottom of your mug. “It’s good to see you, honestly. I didn’t think I would.”

“Yeah, I still have quite a few notes to catch up on. Just because I’m not a teacher doesn’t mean I’m off the hook,” she said with a wink. “What was the seminar about this time?” She tossed the napkins into the trash at the end of the table.

“Oh, just the usual stuff. Classroom management, how to have better boundaries with students, you know, hah.” Knots twisted in your stomach as you leaned against the counter, grabbing a milk carton and tipping it over your mug.

Diane hummed, eyes fixed on your generous pour threatening to overflow the coffee from the rim. “Sounds riveting.”

“Oh yes, enthralling,” you said, folding the mushy lip of the carton back in on itself, something to do with your hands to keep them from shaking. The coffee probably wasn’t going to help.

Diane’s eyes narrowed, “Are you… ok?”

“Me? Oh, yeah. I’m fine. I’m just uh,” you tapped your finger on the edge of your mug. “Parent teacher conference day nerves, you know.”

“Ugh, I can only imagine. I hope everyone is nice to you today. I have no idea why they wouldn’t be.”

You offered a shaky chuckle. “Yeah, me neither. Just getting in my own head I guess.”

“Love the blazer, by the way. Super sharp.”

“Oh, thanks. Figured I’d dress the part.” Grabbing your plate of pizza in one hand and very full mug in the other, you took a sip off the top, marking the rim with a delicate red blot. You pulled out one of the old chairs and found your place in it, which your feet were thankful for.

Diane leaned against the table, “So, Darren called last night.”

“Oh, you’re still talking to him?” The sauce squeezed out from the corners of your bite as you sunk your teeth into the hard cheese and gummy crust.

“Yeah, a bit. Off and on. He’s a nice guy. Does stuff for his sister and her kids lot, which I feel like is a good sign, right?”

Your brows raised a little. “Yeah, totally a good sign,” you said through a mouthful.

“He invited me to the Colts game this weekend. I think I’m gonna go.”

You blotted the sauce from your lips. “Really? I thought you said he wasn’t your type.”

“I mean, what is a type anyway? If I keep waiting around for my type I might be waiting forever. I’ve gotta just start putting myself out there, you know? Give guys the benefit of the doubt for once. You never know until you try,” Diane offered as she opened up the large box of sheet pizza and ripped off two slices onto her plate.

You huffed through your nose, “Sometimes you know.”

“I mean, yeah. Sometimes, but with this one, I dunno. I mean we do have some things in common. We both like Saturday Night Live and spending time outside. He’s decently attractive, or he was at Mojo’s anyway,” she chuckled. “We’ll see what he’s like off the phone. At the very least it’s something to do, right?”

You swallowed your bite. “Right. I mean, hey, free entertainment I guess.”

“That’s the spirit,” said Diane as she settled into the seat beside you.

______

The phone was ringing. Shrill and deeply annoying as it echoed through the trailer. Eddie sighed and pulled himself away from your world in his lap, his expression blank and perturbed. He thought for a moment about answering it. About putting an end to the intrusive noise, but that would mean getting up from the toasty blanket cocoon he’d wrapped his legs in, like a warm pretzel. November’s creeping chill was doing nothing to help his motivation to leave it.

So he let it ring. And ring. Until finally the answering machine picked up, coloring the voice that came through in static and tin.

“Hey man, it’s Gareth. Um… I’m kinda freaking out about this date tomorrow. I know you’re probably just gonna tell me to stop being a pussy, but uh… yeah. Call me back.”

Eddie smirked and rolled his eyes. His friend knew him so well. There would be plenty of time to tell Gareth exactly what he needed to hear. That he was, in fact, being a total pussy. Later though. Right now he was busy.

He was a man named Lazarus now. The Amazing Lazarus, formally. And he had a full time job shuffling cards and making purses disappear.

The small crowd that gathered around him didn’t know that though. Not in this city anyway. He was certain he hadn’t seen any… artistic interpretations of his face plastered on any of the buildings in Torgaard. Yet.

If he could be quick enough with his hands they wouldn’t even notice what was missing until they were blocks away, and by then he would have long since packed up his banner and left.

“Is this your card?” he flourished to the unfortunate man who had stepped forward from the crescent crowd.

The man squinted. “No I don’t think it is.”

“Ah,” he answered curtly. “Oh, what’s this?” He feigned surprised, reaching forward to dip his fingers into the man’s pocket. He pulled back with another flourish. “Is this your card?”

“Why it is!”

Cheers and claps erupted from the crowd. Lazarus took a bow. “Thank you, thank you.” He took off his weathered top hat and passed it around to collect any loose change that the crowd was eager to get rid of.

The people dispersed as quickly as they came, leaving him alone. He reached into the hidden pocket beneath his leather glove and extracted a small pouch. And now, for the even bigger reveal.

He dipped his finger into the opening and loosened the draw strings to reveal a few spare coins and…

Another pocket watch.

It was almost like everyone carried them around in their pockets. Dull and predictable, and practically worthless to him. He sighed, wondering how long it would be before he actually made his trade worth his time today.

That’s when he spotted her — the strangest person he’d seen all day. Maybe all year. Maybe in his entire life, and he’d seen a lot of people.

The first thing he noticed was her shock of white hair, cropped in a bob with bangs like a toddler. She toddled like one too. Petite and girlish. Flat boots with curled toes flapping like duck feet against the dirty cobblestone. Deeply unstable. Crinkled gold coat gleaming like a beacon in the sun.

But the real clincher was the mask she wore. A big crescent moon that swept across her round face. Strange and alien. Stark against deep copper skin. Eyes like saucers.

The perfect target.

He strolled up to her, and her enormous eyes drank him in like they were parched.

“Hey, you look like the type of person who might appreciate a magic trick.”

She looked up at him, chin lowering beneath her mask. “A… a magic trick?”

He couldn’t place the accent.

“Oh yes,” he said, shuffling his cards in an arch from one hand to the other. “Have you ever seen a magic trick before?”

It was a silly question to be asking someone who looked like they’d never seen a man before.

“Oh, um. I do not think so,” she said, her flat silk boots stumbling across the cobblestone to regain her footing. “Sorry I am a little, uh… it is like the air here is just so… different.”

Lazarus stopped shuffling. “Different? Different how? Different from where?”

She looked around, out past the zeppelin docks toward the horizon. She pointed toward the sky. “Myrne.”

“Really,” he half whispered. In all his travels he had never seen a Myrnish person before. He had only ever heard about them from others and what little they knew secondhand of their isolated culture.

“The air…it is just… thicker,” she said between breaths. “Sorry. I am quite dizzy.”

He took a step closer. Close enough to assess that there were no pockets to be found on her strange garments, but there was something else that excited him much more. An obelisk of glimmering pale gold that dangled from her neck. Worth a small fortune, at least.

The gold found in the mines of Mount Myrne was different from any other precious metal in the world. It was found only there, and unlike common gold, was very hard. It sparkled rather than shined, and most importantly possessed an energy that could be harnessed. Like magic.

The gnomes would use it to power their inventions. It didn’t take much of it to make a moderate machine come alive. A piece this size could surely afford him a permanent home, and then some. No more hiding his caravan outside cities. No more paying for stables or worrying about wolves making a meal of his horse.

He could picture it now. A little cottage in Shantiglade by the sea. He would wake up to a full body stretch in a real bed. He would fix himself a goose egg omelet over a real stove with peppers from his garden. He would open his windows and taste the fresh brine in the air.

He would stroll leisurely to the beach where no one knew his face. Where the tide would kiss his ankles and wash away his footprints. Where his past couldn’t follow him.

The pendant winked in the sunlight. She was so small. He could easily break the chain from around her neck with a single tug and run.

“So, what brings you all the way down here?” He drew closer, unable to tear his eyes from the shimmering treasure.

She stepped back in time with his advance, like a dance, adjusting the mask on her face with hesitant eyes.

“I am looking for ghostfern.”

“You’ve come a long way for a plant, my dear.” Another step forward.

Another step back. “My brother needs it. He will die without it.”

It was a look he’d seen before. Desperation twinged with hope. He’d seen it in his own reflection more times than he cared to admit. He saw it in his mother too, though the hope faded almost as quickly as she did when the cost of the cure was too great.

She lowered her gaze. “Ghostfern is very rare. None of our merchants carry it, though I hear it can be found in caves outside of Rower’s End, but I do not know how to get there.”

Rare, expensive — what difference did it make when it was out of reach?

“That’s a long ways off,” he offered solemnly. It was deep into the boglands and nary a merchant dared to venture along the thin, winding path to Rower’s End. The rumors of sinister creatures and bog crone hexes were enough to keep them away.

The strange young woman seemed unfazed by this. “Have you been there before?”

Lazarus huffed. “No, I but I do know how to get there.” The gold obelisk winked at him again and he stilled his itching hands. “How about I uh… make you a deal?”

“A deal?”

“Yes, a deal. I take you to Rower’s End in exchange for that pendant you’re wearing.”

She sized him up, the gears turning behind her enormous, chestnut spheres. “You will take me back then too? To Torgaard?”

Lazarus nodded firmly, “Of course.”

Her eyes crinkled, sparkled like the obelisk she wore. “Then it is a deal.”

“Excellent,” smirked Lazarus. “Ah, what is your name, by the way?”

“Cybelle.” Certainly one he hadn’t heard before.

“Lazarus, pleasure to be doing business with you.” He extended his hand.

Cybelle cocked her head, studying his open palm hovering in the space between them like a foreign object.

“Uh, you — you shake it. See? Like this.” He demonstrated awkwardly with his other hand, then presented her with the opportunity again. “Now you try.”

Cybelle stared at his hand. Her fingers twitched, gaze darting from his palm to his eyes. “Ah… sorry.” She put her hands up sheepishly, waving his away. “Trying not to get sick.”

Lazarus retracted his hand and gave a single, solemn nod. “As you wish.”

______

Your eyes tracked down your list of parent names, then up at the clock. It was 6:45 on the dot. The last name on your list was scheduled at 6:40.

There was a part of you that hoped he wouldn’t show at all. The churning in your stomach was kicking up with each minute that ticked by, anxious eyes flitting from the paper, to the door, to the clock.

Until suddenly a figure appeared in the doorway. He was tall, weathered, with a short grey beard. Hair even shorter, stark against the ruddy skin that it encircled atop his head. He wore a denim jacket with a corduroy collar and olive green work slacks stained with patches of grease.

He peered around your classroom tentatively, as if looking for a sign that he found the right one. “Hi, Wayne Munson." It sounded like more of a question.

You stood up from behind your desk with a jolt. “Oh, hi! You must be Eddie’s dad.” Knots twisted in your stomach. You extended your hand to him and put on the warmest, brightest mask you could muster.

“Uncle, actually.” His hand was rough and thickly calloused, fingers stained from nicotine. You could smell the stale scent of his vice on him, a family habit, evidently. “Sorry ’m a little late. Still a bit early for me, I work the graveyard at the plant.”

Uncle. The questions bubbled in your gut but there was no place to air them in the split second between you. “Oh that’s no problem, you’re last on my list today anyway. Here, have a seat.” You gestured to the chair opposite yours at your desk.

Your desk. The same desk his nephew held your hand under. Your stomach churned again.

As Wayne eased himself into the small, wooden chair, you allowed your timid eyes enough agency to take stock. There was a weight to him, not in his body but in his aura. A heaviness that you could feel. Tired stories you strained to read between the lines on his face, stained into the cracks of his fingers. You would search for the resemblance to the one you saw most often in that chair. You would find very little save for their strong oval faces and the warmth that surprised you in his ice blue eyes.

Wayne sighed, deep and heavy as he creaked back into the chair. “Alright, how’s Ed doing in class?” he asked flatly.

There was something else in his eyes, leaden like defeat. Like bracing steel. Like tired expectation.

He might as well have said, “Let’s get this over with.” It was the same tune. A tune he memorized. Sung a thousand times. A tune his voice was tired of.

“Eddie is…” a soft smile crept onto your face and you suddenly became captivated with the pen on your desk. You felt him lean forward, hinging on the words you left hanging in the air.

And so you told him the truth.

“…one of the most creative and tenacious people I know.”

There was a breath that he’d been holding in, a sigh that permeated the stunned stillness between you.

“I know it isn’t easy for him to be here. I know he’d rather be doing a million other things but he’s still here, you know? Despite being denied graduation twice.”

He knew. You could see it as clearly as the lines that softened on his forehead.

“I mean sure, I could tell you that he’s got a B minus in my class right now. We could sit here and talk about grades, and attendance, and behavior, but… he’s trying really hard and I don’t think that you can… quantify that. There aren’t grades for effort. They don’t give marks for how many lonely students you offer a place to sit in the cafeteria. It isn’t something you can measure.”

Wayne leaned closer, the ice in his eyes melting so much that he needed to blink it away.

The sight stirred a deep part of you. The easing of the bracing steel into something so much softer. Tender like a bruise. You thought about Eddie Munson with pen on his hand and shame in his eyes. Your nose burned.

“You know he’s got a lot of leadership qualities too,” you said, steadying the quiver from your voice. “He’s in a band, he runs a club. He’s involved and engaged. He’s…” your eyes lowered again, thumbing at the pen on your desk. “He’s got an enormous heart,” you said, quieter. “I think he’s just… extraordinary. If you want to know the truth.”

Wayne glanced away, toward the windows, as he swiped a calloused finger at his cheek. “M’sorry,” he muttered, blinking. “Y’know I’ve been goin’ to these for the past, what is it… nine years now? Nobody ever has nothin’ good to say about ‘im. Not a single one.”

An ache sank deep in your chest. It stung, like your eyes did when you imagined the younger versions of the man who took that chair most often, and those of the one in it now. Sitting in front of the big desk. Facing someone who was far less kind than you on the other side.

“You’re the one who’s been tutoring ‘im, aren’t you?”

You swallowed, stomach churning again. You figured he’d mentioned that. It would have been strange for him not to. “Yes. A few times a week after school. It seems to be helping. He showed me his progress report, all passing grades so far. He’s gonna walk that stage this year. He will if I have anything to do about it.”

Wayne cracked a smile at your determination. “Well thank you kindly for all your patience. I mean it. The boy’s always struggled in school. Been an issue even ‘fore I had ‘im.”

“What happened before you had him?” The words tumbled out of your mouth before you even had a moment to process whether they were appropriate or not. Whether it was your place to ask.

Wayne sighed deep as his weathered hand eased the exhaustion creasing his brow. “My younger bother is… really somethin’ else to put it mildly. Always has been. He’s in county now doin’ time for stealin’ cars and other petty shit— sorry, young lady, pardon my French.”

You shook your head and waved it off, the humor of his comment overshadowed by the concern twisting in your stomach. “It’s fine, really. Please continue.”

“Ed’s mom on the other hand, well she had ‘er own problems but not like him. Actually, I recon Warren was the biggest problem she ever had. Real young when she had Ed, maybe 19, if even. ’S hard to remember. Younger than Warren was, I know that much. We were all still livin’ in West Virginia at the time. A few years after that Warren got in hot water with the law. Packed up Lorena and the baby and settled in Hawkins with a few gamblin’ buddies he’d met from out this way.”

A twist, deep in your heart. You swallowed, leaning forward.

“Well, Warren managed to find some stable employment fixin’ cars. Stayed out of trouble for a few more years. Then Lorena started gettin’ sick. Always had issues with her heart, see. I don’t think the stress of livin’ out here with Warren helped none. I seen the way he’d talk to her when I would visit, always so suspicious of every damn thing.”

Your chest was so tight all of a sudden. Head filled with flashes of images you’d never seen. Images that you could feel. A woman in a cotton dress looking out a window. A profound loneliness. A longing for a freedom she may never know.

“When Warren started gettin’ into trouble again I knew I had to do something, for Ed and Lori’s sake. They put ‘im away for a year that time, so I packed it up and moved out here. It was a good year. Gave us all a break from my brother. Sorry to go on a tangent, it’s just been a lot.” Wayne sighed deeply, smoothing his beard with his hand.

“No, no you’re fine,” you reassured, putting on your best mask for him. Behind it you were breaking.

“He was worse when he came back though. Started gettin’ into drugs. Few years after that, Lori passed due to her heart. Ed was ten at the time. I shouldn’t have let the bastard have him at all, but he was stubborn as hell and he had custody. Had ‘im for a year before he finally messed up bad enough to go away for a long while. Best thing he ever did was go to jail, I’ll tell you what.”

“I—,” you took a deep breath, the pen on the desk so enthralling again, “I’m sorry, this is… I wasn’t, um, expecting—”

“No I’m… sorry to dump all this on you. Don’t get many people who wanna listen to be honest.”

“No, it’s really ok. I’m the one who asked. It’s just…”

“I know. Kid’s had it rough, to put it mildly.”

You took a slow, shaky inhale to steady yourself and found the courage to meet his eyes again. “He’s incredibly lucky to have you,” you said earnestly.

The ice in his eyes melted again. The steel now soft and pliant. The weight in him less heavy.

“You’ve done such a good job raising him,” you offered gently, swallowing your tears. “Really, he’s a wonderful person. You should be so proud.”

Wayne sighed, allowing a full, bright smile to wash over him. He blinked quickly, glancing toward the windows again, and you wondered how often he heard that. If he ever did before.

“Thank you,” he said, barely audible.

It was strange, your sudden fondness for a man you dreaded meeting.

“I should be thanking you. For sharing. For everything,” you said, stilling the quiver in your chest with a deep breath. “I think that’s all I really have for you today.” Your trembling hands gripped the chair beneath you.

Wayne nodded, “I’m glad I came. For once.”

You smiled, big and bright. “I’m glad you did too.” You extended your hand, your open palm hovering in the space between you. “It’s been an honor to meet you.”

Wayne’s warm, calloused hand bridged the great divide and squeezed yours gently. Lingered for a moment. “You as well,” he said, a fondness you could feel in his touch. He gave a firm shake before letting go.

“Have a great rest of your day,” you said with mustered cheer as he creaked out of the wooden chair.

“You as well,” he said with a wave as he made his way toward the door. His footsteps faded beyond the threshold, into the din of the hallway.

A deep, ragged sigh escaped you.

You thought about Eddie Munson again. Thought about his oval face and big brown eyes. Thought about them smaller. In a hospital. Filled with unspeakable sadness. Sitting in the emptiness she left behind. At home by himself drawing dragons on his pages. Fighting a monster in his living room.

Eddie Munson. With pen on his hand and shame in his eyes.

There was hope in them too. Unbreakable. Eager and wild. Restless, and frenetic, and warm.

All at once.

It surfaced then. The strangled sob that released from your chest. It echoed off the tile floor and concrete walls that would still surround you both.

______

A/N: Apologies for how angsty that was. I sincerely hope you enjoyed it though, lots to explore in these new worlds we're uncovering ;)

As always, I deeply appreciate any and all comments -- keyboard smashes, theories, small novels, all of it. I work very hard on this story and hearing your reactions fuels me in ways that I can only begin to tell you.

Please reblog and help others to find my precious creation! ✨

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#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson older reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x teacher!reader #stranger things fanfiction #eddie munson angst #don't stand so close to me

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