#I think the posting emails are running late again so here you go if you're interested

[ms-demeanor]

Hello,Do you have any tips for recovering from internet brain rot? It's like my patience has dried up and if there's a huge amount of text (even about topics I'm very interested in) that I have to read, I get annoyed and just don't interact with the material at all.

I have multiple tips!

TL;DR (Because of course I generated a wall of text): Take a break from the internet, create a schedule for getting yourself used to reading longer texts, take breaks while reading, and perhaps reconsider how you interact with The Internet and the world in general.

Here are the basic "to reduce the brain rot just don't interact" tips:

Take a break. Give yourself time off from The Internet (for these purposes The Internet is the social media industrial complex; clickbait news, recommended videos, social media sites, etc. You don't have to totally check out of email or your local news site, just get away from the huge time sucks). I'd say to take at least one day a week where you're online for less than an hour a day, and to maybe work up to doing a week-long break from whatever the main agents of rot are.

Once you've identified the main agents of rot, give yourself a time limit or set up rules for yourself. I don't let myself look at social media in bed, for instance; no staying up late on my phone, no scrolling before I get up and start my day. I don't give myself a strict time limit anymore, but for a while there I was very firm about "you only get to go online 4 hours a day" with myself.

Don't comment (or at least only share the things you really want to share). If you feel the need to argue, or if you feel pressured into sharing something, don't. Step back, maybe even open the post in a new tab or send it to yourself, and come back later. If you've been thinking about it and have decided it IS something you care enough to talk about, share it. If you look at the tab and feel stressed out or still feel reactive, close the tab and walk away.

Go out and interact with the real world in a non-work capacity for a few hours a week; take walks or go shopping or go out and take pictures of insects. Touch grass so that The Internet is not the only thing you're doing with your downtime.

Here are the "work on reading longer texts specifically" tips:

Set a reading goal for yourself. Maybe you want to read one New Yorker article a week, maybe you want to read all the way through news articles, maybe you want to read novels like you used to in high school. Figure out what your actual goal is and articulate that goal to yourself.

Set up a practice schedule and gradually increase the amount of time you're reading. Don't go from short tumblr posts to a novella, go from short tumblr posts to slightly longer news articles, then to slightly longer essays, then to a novella. You can do this in literal paragraphs if you want to - maybe your goal for your first day is to read five paragraphs in a row, and the second day is seven, and the third day is ten, etc, until you are comfortably reading for longer amounts of time without counting paragraphs. (Try this with books from gutenberg.org; read a classic you haven't read a few paragraphs at a time and if you find yourself going over your paragraph count, let yourself run with it. If you finish a book, good for you, find another one and start again.)

Set up a maintenance schedule. If your goal is to read longer news pieces, try to read a longer piece every week and try to read to the end of every news article you open. If your goal is to read novels or longer nonfiction, try to read a book a month (maybe setting aside dedicated time each week to read, maybe Thursday evenings are book time now). If you find yourself falling back into old habits, take a break from The Internet and do some more rigorous practice for a while.

If you find yourself getting frustrated while you are reading you can also take a break! Read until you get frustrated and then *instead of switching to a different page or closing the article* close your eyes or look out the window or away from the screen for thirty seconds (count 'em! count out the time in your head) and then continue reading. You can also take a longer pause and sit and think about why you're getting frustrated. Is it the subject matter? Is it just looking at this text for longer than a couple minutes (if you are experiencing FOMO because you're reading for another few minutes instead of scrolling, the harder tips at the bottom are going to be important to you)? Are you comfortable? Are you reading this text to procrastinate from something and the procrastination is making you nervous? Are you trying to read to the bottom of your dash and reading a long post is taking up more time than you want while scrolling? Are you bored? Genuinely and very seriously: are your eyes straining and does your head hurt (if this is the case when is the last time you had your eyes checked or your glasses prescription updated)?

Here are the much harder "examine yourself and reassess your reactions to things" tips:

Work on re-training your attention span.

Identify something that you enjoy and find deeply engaging, and schedule some dedicated time for that thing. Set a literal timer (it can be a short amount of time at first) and sit down and do the thing without switching to a different website or opening up an app on your phone. This can be re-reading or watching a couple episodes of a show you like or listening to your favorite album while you sit down and draw. What's important is to spend a longer time focusing on doing something you DO like before attempting to spend a longer time focusing on something you DON'T like.

When you're starting on things you DON'T like, start with things you mildly don't like, or that feel tedious but aren't actually unpleasant. One way I do this is by transcribing poetry; I look up poems that I connect to and I transcribe them into a notebook that I have for that purpose. I enjoy having the finished product, but I don't enjoy the process, so it takes some effort to stick with it. Maybe there is a boring book you have been trying to get through, maybe you need to detail your car, maybe you've been trying to take up embroidery - these are good things to make yourself pay attention to (having music or a podcast on can help, but avoid watching videos or opening social apps)

When you're okay at that kind of thing (doing something not actively unpleasant) work on your attention span for things you ACTIVELY don't like. I don't think you should be a masochist about this, but you should work on being okay with doing unpleasant things for a sustained period of time. All of us have to do unpleasant stuff sometimes, and it's better to be able to pay attention to it for an hour at a time than it is to put it off forever.

This leads into the next Big Tip which is:

Work on being less reactive

Find something that you dislike; I'm going to use conservative talk radio as my example.

Expose yourself to the disliked thing for short periods of time (under ten minutes, maybe under five minutes).

Work on moderating your emotions during the time spent exposed to the disliked thing. If it makes you angry, work on intellectualizing the anger without becoming agitated by it. If it makes you sad, work on accepting that sadness without letting it drag down your mood. This isn't precisely about becoming numb to stimuli, but it is about being more in control of how your emotional reactions impact you.

Analyze the disliked thing. Why does it make you angry? Is that on purpose by the creator of the thing? Would it make someone else angry in the same way? How would you explain the anger to a neutral third party?

Consider responding instead of reacting. Let's say you're seeing a lot of very sad and upsetting things online and it's making you sad and upsetting you. You re-share these things because you don't feel like there's anything else you can do or you get angry when you see people sharing incorrect information, perhaps you argue with people about this. Now try looking at the upsetting things through the lens of point number four. This has upset you; how has it upset you? And once you've thought about how it upset you and have articulated that to yourself, find out what you can DO. I cannot make conservative talk radio go off the air, but I can support the groups harmed by conservative talk radio; thus there is no point in me getting upset and angry about conservative talk radio when I could be helping the people they target instead.

And that gets us to the last big tip which is:

Ask yourself if you are spending your time in a way that is enjoyable and edifying.

We all have limited time in our days and limited time in our lives. If you are finding yourself frequently frustrated online, it's a good time to consider whether you want to be spending so much time online.

If you feel like The Internet has become a rat race in which you can't read more than a few paragraphs without getting frustrated, there's a good chance that not only are you spending too much time on The Internet, but you're also spending it on doing things that you don't particularly like.

A realization like yours, Anon, that you are getting frustrated with any longer texts, can actually be really helpful because it provides a good opportunity to look at what you're engaging with and consider the questions:

Is this something I enjoy?

Do I feel good when I do this thing?

And that's a great way to figure out how to get rid of things that are leading to your background frustration. Maybe that looks like paring down the list of blogs you follow, maybe that looks like unsubscribing from some youtubers and podcasts, maybe that looks like uninstalling apps, maybe that looks like blocking a whole bunch of people and terms on your socials.

I don't think that everything we do has to help us grow as a person or expand our consciousness or anything like that, but I do think it's important to prioritize doing things that you like and doing things that you feel good about.

Like, I'm not doing something *wrong* if I spend an afternoon on Youtube watching drama channels every once in a while, but if I come out of a few afternoons of watching youtube drama channels feeling restless and anxious and like I wasted my time - even if I enjoyed myself while I was watching - it's probably a good idea for me to take a break from drama channels and see if there's something I can do instead that will make me feel better.

ALSO, A NOTE:

You are an animal that requires significant enrichment in your enclosure.

Think about tigers. Tigers in captivity are going to be excited to get high-value treats for any reason. They will eat and enjoy the treats. But if a tiger in captivity is only given the treats and never given any other form of activity to engage with, it is not going to be a happy tiger. If you start putting their treats in a pumpkin or a puzzle feeder or giving them toys to play with, that is going to be a much happier tiger.

Please give your brain things to play with that are more than just treats (though it does need some treats!). Make yourself a happy tiger. Your brain need a puzzle feeder, not a treat button.

[foxyarchive]

Your Guardian Angel(Or Devil) P1

You're an average young woman, just trying to live your life. After almost meeting your untimely demise one night, you're saved by a foul-mouthed divine being who claims to be your Guardian Angel, AND the first man.

OR; Adam is your Guardian Angel who swoops in to save you when you need it, and also pesters you whenever he feels like it. This arrangement is fun for neither of you.

Cross Posted on AO3!

Warnings: Swearing, suggestive comments, Adam being Adam.....

Words: ~7K

May end up being a two parter because that's all I have ideas for, but definitely down to write more of Reader and Adam together if you all wanna send me ideas here or on my AO3! Enjoy!

P1 | P2 | P3

Today had, certainly, been one of the days of all time. 

It had started off with the coffee maker essentially breaking. You’d managed to get about half of a cup of the normal amount of coffee you made while you were throwing together some breakfast for yourself. When you’d went over to investigate to try brewing again, nothing was happening. If the red, soulless, blinking light on your maker was anything to go by, it was that the damned thing had died. 

With a sigh, you ended up pouring an overabundance of your preferred mix-in while eating your quick little breakfast. You were already running a bit behind. In a rush to finish getting ready, you’d ended up smudging a bit of the lipstick you had put on, forcing you to be even more behind as you needed to clean it off and reapply anything necessary. 

You’d finally grabbed your bag and were out the door, and when you got in your car, saw that you were nearly out of gas. You tried to think; What in the Hell would compel you to leave your car on nearly empty and not fill up after work? It was then, you recalled, wanting to catch the season finale of a show last night with your friend. You’d hurried home, and had just said to yourself you’d wake up early this morning and fill up before going to work. 

Of fucking course today had to be the day you woke up a bit later after staying up unusually late last night. A groan split from your throat, rubbing your temple with two fingers. You hadn’t packed a lunch, either, so guess you were going hungry most of the day beside some of the snacks in your drawer. You wouldn’t have enough time to get gas and lunch on your break. At this point, all you could do was pray that you’d be able to make it to a gas station after work. You did have an… Unconventional guardian angel, after all, so surely it would all work out…

Speaking of guardian angel…

“Yo, I don’t know if you can, uh, hear me right now… I mean, I assume you can, if you’re, like, kinda omnipotent or whatever, but… Try and make my day a little better, alright?” You said, somewhat awkwardly to the empty air around you in your car as you drove to work. No response. You felt like a mad woman. 

With a sigh, you just continued your drive. Finding parking at the office went awful, no surprise, and you walked in about seven minutes after you were supposed to clock in. Your boss didn’t say anything, but the stare given to you was enough to know that your tardiness was apparent. All you could do right now was just keep your head down and check your emails from your clients and work diligently. 

Thankfully, the day was going by smoothly… So far. Besides needing to put a fire via email, and your pencil cup holder being somehow knocked over twice mysteriously(you sent a glare over your shoulder every time but didn’t see anyone), you had nothing else to complain about. That was, until just before lunch, you felt a cramp. At first, you thought it was a hunger pain, and tried to shift to brush it off. The more you cramped, though, you felt it lower in your gut, and your heart sank. No shot, your cycle wasn’t supposed to be for another few days!

You cursed to yourself, deciding to take an early lunch to check. You shuffled through your drawer to see if you had anything– Tampons, pads, a cup, something to try and stop the flow while you were at work. Nothing. Great. You grumbled to yourself, getting up to head to the bathroom. The company you worked for was fairly small, the middle ground between a small business owner and a blossoming corporation, so nothing for feminine sanitation was available in either bathrooms.

Sitting down in the restroom, you shucked your pants and underwear down, groaning at the sight of a faint bit of blood splattering your underwear. “Motherfu…” Your grumble trailed off whilst you  suppressed the urge to rub at your face in frustration. Instead, you just made a rather unsavory hand gesture with both of your hands to nobody in particular. Well, actually, yes there was somebody in particular, but you couldn’t see him right now. You weren’t even sure if he could see you, but it certainly made you feel better. 

Stifling a groan, you wrapped some toilet paper around your underwear to try and soak up anything for now. After you were redressed and hands were washed, you headed back to your desk to eat a measly granola bar and some dried fruit, before clocking back in and continuing on with your day. 

After getting yelled at over the phone by a client for something that wasn’t even your fault, as well as accidentally spilling some water over your keyboard while staying late, work was over for the day. You were just looking forward to going home, taking a nice, hot shower, and watching whatever brain rot you decided to indulge in tonight. Maybe with some ice cream. You were once more reminded, though, that you needed to get gas in your car once you got in and started it up. The nearest gas station wasn’t incredibly close, so you were biting your lip the entire time you drove there. 

You nearly slumped in relief when you saw it right around the corner, but any relief that was in your veins washed away as you pulled up just inside of the parking lot, and your car began to roll. You pushed on the gas rapidly, but nothing was happening. “Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck–” You began to freak out, before relaxing somewhat. It would just… Roll to one of the pumps, right? Wrong, apparently. Oh, so, very wrong. There was a slight incline upwards to the gas pumps, and to your horror, the car started to even roll backwards. 

“No!” You gasped, quickly putting it into park. You took in a small, shuddering breath, putting it back into drive as you tried to push on the gas again. Nothing. You’d run out literally right inside the gas station lot. Due to leaving work later than normal because of not only coming in late, but needing to deal with an unruly client, nobody else was here at the moment. Nobody could help you. For what felt like the umpteenth time that day, another groan left your lips as your head slammed back against the carseat head. 

With now an annoyed snarl, you pushed open your car door, slamming it as you walked around to the back of your car after putting it in neutral. “Okay… Okay, I can do this… Just a small nudge up the hill… It’s barely a hill, too, it’s fine, I can move a couple hundred… Thousand…” You uttered to yourself, trying to hype up as you shifted foot from foot. After some brief stretching, you placed your hands on the back of your car, beginning to slowly push it. Or, well, at least try to push it. You were so focused on your task, you didn’t even notice a figure pop up beside you. 

“‘Sup.” Adam greeted, causing you to gasp and nearly slip and fall in surprise. 

“Adam! Good God you have shitty timing.” You groaned, slumping against the back of your car. You were already exhausted and you hadn’t even been trying to push for two minutes!

“Hey, what’d I say? Good girls only get into Heaven by not using the Lord’s name in vain.” He drawled, boredly, leaning against the side of your car as he looked over his nails. Well, more aptly, his fingers. He had gloves on, after all, so obviously it was just for show, and it just irritated you more. About to bite out a response, he beat you to it by finally surveying the situation. “Pfffft–” Came from him as he grinned, before he started to laugh, backing away from your car and pointing at you. “What– What the fuck are you doing? Did you run out of gas?”

“S-Shut up!” You snapped, face flushing warm in embarrassment as he laughed at you, but he didn’t yield. You stomped your foot in irritation, a small whine leaving your throat as you realized just how stupid the whole situation was. “It’s not funny!”

“Hah– Haha– I hate to tell you, sugartits, but it’s actually hilarious.” He finally calmed down, wiping an invisible tear from his face with a sigh and smug smile, putting his hands on his hips. He didn’t seem to be phased by your anger at all. “Aww, you’re so cute when you’re mad.” He inched towards you, ignoring your seething expression as he patted your head. “Like a wittle angwy kitty–” 

“Fuck you.” You snarled out, slapping his hand away as you turned back to your car, and he was the one who scoffed like he’d been offended. The nerve. “Some fuckin’ angel you are, laughing at my misery.” You grouse, turning back to your vehicle, placing your hands on the back once more. 

He just offers a roll of his eyes. Or, well, what appears to be a roll with the incline he makes with his head. He doesn't have pupils, after all. “Babes, it’s not the first time I have, and it’s definitely not gonna be the last.” Comes his response, and he seems once more impassive to the glare you send him before you focus back ahead. “I mean, c’mon, I already gotta look after your ass, I wanna get some amusement out of it. Speaking of looking at ass…” You’re bent forward again, trying to push the car forward with all of your might. You did manage to roll it maybe a few inches, but it once again left you exhausted. You caught Adam looking at your butt with an appreciative view on his face. “You should wear shorter skirts–” He begins to speak, but you cut him off this time. 

“Don’t you have something better to do?” You snip, bristling at his suggestive commentary as you stand here and struggle your way forward. “If you’re just going to stand there and be inappropriate, then will you kindly piss off?” You huff, looking back at your car once more. 

“Fine, be a cunt, see if I care.” He scoffs out in response, flipping you the bird as he turns away. It’s then, suddenly, you realize maybe work has really dulled your mind. He’s your guardian angel, it’s his job to help you!

“Wait, wait!” You sigh out, exasperated, as you turn and grab for him, thankful he didn’t just poof away yet. You reach for his robes, but end up grabbing one of his wings as they flared out, yanking back. 

“Ow, bitch, watch the feathers!” He snarls out, turning on you with a glare of his own. He draws his wing over to him, brushing his hand against it with a sneer as he looks down at you. “The fuck you want? Want to apologize for your bratty behavior?” He huffs, and you can’t suppress a roll of your eyes, try as you might. 

“No, I’d like your help in pushing my car up to a pump.” You’re growing more and more weary by the minute. How has literally nobody else pulled into the gas station? At this point, maybe you should just ask the worker inside to help you. He just crosses his arms, raising a brow at your request. 

“And why should I help you?” He decides to play coy, and you grit both your jaw and hands into fists. 

“Because you’re my guardian angel! You’re literally supposed to help me!” Comes your snappy response, and he taps a finger to his chin, pondering with a ‘hmmm’, as if actually thinking about your response. 

“Mmm… Yeah, nah, babes, not how that works. What part of ‘guardian’ do you not fuckin’ understand? You want a dictionary, bitch?” He snaps his fingers, the thick book appearing in his hand in a puff of golden dust as he offers it out to you. “Why don’t you look up the definition of it and study up?” You eye twitches as you none too kindly shove his arm away from you that offers you the dictionary. 

“I know what it means, I don’t need to look it up!” You hiss out. You’re almost on the verge of tears, now, as the frustration burns through your entire being. You’re hungry, cramping and aching, and stressed out about this whole thing. You’re not sure if Adam seems to notice this, with the slight way you see the hard edges around his smug grin soften some. Either he doesn’t care or notice, though, as you continue on. “I could be in danger! I-I mean, if I don’t move the car, someone will pull forward, and if they don’t pay attention they could run right into me! Then I would be hurt! And maybe even die!” You emphasize with a wave of your hands. 

He doesn’t seem very moved by your speech, the book disappearing from his hands as he crosses his arms once more. “Mm… Kay, then I’ll just pluck you out of the way. I mean, I don’t see what you’re getting at here, ‘tits. Sounds like you want me to do all the work for your fuck up.” He motions lazily with a hand towards the car, and boy if you weren’t ready to burst into tears before, you are now, because, honestly? He’s right. You’re the reason you’re in this mess. He’s clearly soaking up your suffering as well, a sly smile slowly spreading across his features as he sees you try to blink back tears of frustration. 

He finally takes some pity on you. Well, what Adam would consider pity, at least. “What’s in it for me, huh?” He leers, taking a step over you. He towers over you easily, inhumanly tall. Whereas it intimidated you at first, now? It just pisses you off more, because it’s something else he has to lord over you. You don’t know why he does when he’s already some super powerful angel, according to him, but he clearly likes to put you in your place. Remind you you’re just some mortal human in a realm of other, shitty mortal humans. 

So, when he asks what he gets out of this, you’re at a loss. You open your mouth, closing it, frowning. What could you offer someone like Adam? You peer up at him, not liking the way that sly grin on his face grows, somewhat leering even, now. “Well… What do you want?” You finally ask, and immediately regret it as his hand comes down to grope your ass. You squeak, more so from the grip than surprise, because really, you shouldn’t be surprised. “Something that’s not part of my body! I’m on my period, too.” You huff out, face and ears burning, and he immediately makes a face and retracts his hand. 

“Hmmm…” He rubs his chin in thought, actual thought now, as he turns to pace. His wings are tucked back under his arms, which you keep meaning to ask it about because truthfully, you find it adorable. You didn’t think angels presented their wings like that, but it makes some sense. “Oh! What was that, fucking uuuhhh… Ice cream thing with the fudge in the middle? With all that candy shit on top?” He snaps his fingers, looking back at you. You draw a blank, briefly, before recognizing what he’s talking about. 

“You mean… A blizzard?” You ask, slowly, and he grins, nodding eagerly. 

“Yeah, yeah! Buy me one of those and I guess we’ll call it the start to being even.” He states, and your eye twitches again. 

“The ‘start’?” You emphasize, and Adam just waves his hand dismissively. 

“Yeah, yeah, don’t worry, the other thing I phone in will be somethin’ simple. Promise promise.” He insists, and at this point, you’re so desperate you don’t question it. You did say you wanted ice cream, after all… You’re also sure he wouldn’t ask for anything absurd either. 

“...Fine.” You relent, motioning him over as you make some room to push the car once more. He pushes you out of the way, though, with one of his brilliantly golden wings, causing you to sputter as some of the feathers poke into your mouth and nostrils. 

“Get in the car, bitch. Guide us over to a pump.” He orders, and a huff leaves you, but you don’t resist. You’ll gladly take sitting in the car and turning the wheel over pushing with massive manual labor. Once in the driver's seat, you begin to turn the wheel enough to pull into one of the pump stations. Adam is… Freakishly strong, to no surprise, and it honestly feels like you’re actually driving with how fast the car is going. Driving at an incredibly slow speed, but one nonetheless. When you finally stop at a pump, you put the car in park with a sigh, feeling significantly more relieved and less stressed. 

You get out, locking it up as you head for the gas station store. “Uh, you’re fuckin’ welcome!” You hear Adam scoff, and you suppress a roll of your eyes if only because he did actually help you out. 

“Thank you, Adam.” You relent, turning around. “So very kind of you, I would be at a loss without you.” Is tacked on at the end, and he just smirks, strutting over to you. 

“I know. I’m the best. Doncha forget it, sugartits.” He responds as a sigh leaves you. 

“You want a snack?” You offer out, deciding to play nice, and he grins. 

“Uh, fuck yes.” He agrees, perking up even more as you both walk into the convenience store. You decide to get an electrolyte drink for yourself, since you’re feeling awfully thirsty and tired. Adam grabs some beef jerky, and as you go to the counter to pay, he speaks up. “Shit, wait, hold on– I want those cheesy crackers.” He states, and you roll your eyes but wait as the cashier rings up your other items. You hold your hand out as Adam comes back over, taking the bag in your hand to offer up to the cashier, digging through your wallet to get out something to pay 

When you realize the bag hasn’t been taken out of your hand, you look up, confused. The cashier looks at you, his eyes wide, mouth agape. “Um…” You shift, awkwardly. Did you have something on your face?

“The fuck is this guy’s problem?” The angel barks out behind you, and you set the bag down, watching the cashier’s eyes follow it incredulously. Your brow furrows, before you suddenly put two and two together. 

“Oh, shit,” You utter out in realization. Adam had given you that bag. And you were the only one who could see Adam. Oh God, that isn’t good. 

“This guy have shit-for-brains? Seriously, if he stares any longer, he’s gonna start drooling, and–” You shift your leg back, pressing down somewhat firmly onto Adam’s foot. “Hey, bitch, watch where you’re stepping! You just–” You turn around to face him, but purposefully look right through him. Towards where he’d grabbed the bag, and then you tap it slightly. You hope he can get it through his thick skull what you’re trying to imply. “...Ooohhh…” It finally dawns on him, his eyes widening as he looks at the isle, and then at you, then at the worker. “Oh, shit.” He echoes you, before he briskly moves you aside again with his arm. “Move, bitch, let me handle this.”

He stands in front of the worker, snapping his fingers in front of the cashier’s face, a puff of golden dust emanating from his hand. The other human blinks, a glazed look coming over his eyes as he stares at nothing in particular now. “Okay, let’s go, he won’t remember a thing.” Adam urges, and you stutter. You barely have time to slap down some money on the counter and grab your things before you’re shuffled outside. You’re antsy as you pay at the pump and put in your gas, and when you’re filled up enough you get in the car and drive off. 

“You can’t just do shit like that, Adam!” You finally speak up once you’re driving away, the firstborn lounging in your backseat due to just being too big to sit up front. 

“I fuckin’ forgot, okay!?” He huffs out, his wings fluffing out indignantly as he sprawls out. You slap one of his wings back as it curls forward and brushes against your head and neck, not only making you shiver, but blocking you from seeing out your review mirror and back window. 

“Wings down in the car, what have I said before!?” You chastise, and he just scoffs, sitting up, hunching forward as he rests an arm on your middle console. 

“Jeeze, chillax, babes! I wiped his mind, he’s not going to remember it, why you still got your panties in a twist?” He sneers, and you growl out, carefully maneuvering to grab one of the horns on his head to push it down more. “Hey, hey, hey, fuckin’ watch the mask, bitch! You don’t get to manhandle the original dick!” 

“I can’t fucking see with your giant ass head in the way!” Your clipped response comes out, before you realize something. “Wait– This is a mask?” You’re still holding onto one of the horns, and shake it a bit. He growls out and swats your hand away, which you don’t fight against as you put your hand back on the wheel. 

“Pfft, uh, yeah? What, did you think this was actually my face?” He’s resting his head on the console now, pointing to his apparent mask, smirking up at you. You flounder, briefly, mouth opening, before it closes. 

“...I mean. Honestly? Yeah. You eat with it. How does that even work!?” You glance at him, eyes wide, and his smirk just lengthens. 

“Angelic magic, ‘tits. Fancy as fuck and cooler than anything you mortals got down here in your sorry realm.” He enlightens, and you don’t have a smart comeback for that because he’s right. 

“...Pretty cool, actually. Can I have one someday?” You ask, and he curls himself back, splaying out once more across your car’s back seats. 

“Maaaaybe. Usually only the big dogs like me get somethin’ this sick.” He responds, shifting multiple times to try and get comfortable. You just roll your eyes as you pull up to the drive-thru, waiting your turn, before glancing back at him. 

“Can I see your real face?” You decide to inquire, and he raises a brow at your question, now chewing none-too-quietly on some beef jerky. 

“Uh, you wanna owe me more?” He snorts, and you just scoff in reply, looking ahead as you pull up a bit more. 

“Didn’t realize I’d have to owe you for you taking your mask off.” You mutter out, and he laughs somewhat, sitting up with another fluff of his wings. You don’t call him out on it for now since you’re just sitting in line. 

“Can’t get something for nothing, babes. Not a whole lotta people get to see the OG’s face, and I don’t think some fuckin’ mortal is gonna see it.” He chews some more on his snack, and you hold your hand out for a piece. He glares at you, before relenting and handing you a small strip, which you gnaw on to sate your hunger. May as well pick up dinner here too, then. 

“I’m just ‘some fuckin’ mortal’ to you?” You scoff in response, placing a hand to your chest in faux offense. “I thought what we had was special, Adam!” He rolls his eyes at your theatrics, flicking your head, and you scowl in response. 

“Nah, you ain’t special, bitch. Well, I guess you are maybe a little. After all, not everyone’s guardian is–”

“The original dick, yeah, yeah, I get it.” You grouse, and now he looks offended that you interrupted him, before shrugging it off because clearly what he’s saying means something. He goes quiet, though, as you pull up to order. You get him a blizzard, and yourself some ice cream as well as dinner. 

“Hey, wait, I want something else!” He whines, shoving his head forward once again, and you frown, looking at him. God, how much could he eat? “Gimme uhhh… That! And, oh, also that!” He’s pointing at items on the menu, moreso the pictures, and you glare at him. You can’t speak, as the woman through the speaker could still hear you, and he just looks at you. “What? Order, bitch, there’s people behind you!” You just continue to glare, and he glares back, eyes squinting. “Uggghh, what do you want from me? I can’t fuckin’ pay, I don’t have your stupid Earth money.” Still silence. The woman at the speakers asks if you want anything else, and you tell her to hold on as you stare Adam down. 

He taps his finger on your console impatiently, before groaning and throwing his head back. “Fine! This can be the other part of what you owe me.” He sighs out, and you decide to cut your losses and accept that. You turn back to the speaker, ordering what he wants as well, before driving forward, waiting for the car ahead of you to get their food. 

“Do you think I’m made of money or something? I’m barely making ends meet.” You speak up, finally, rubbing one of your eyes as you try to stave off the tired ache in your body. Your cramps are starting to kick back up, too, and that’s definitely not helping. 

“Sounds like a you problem.” Is all Adam replies as he leans back again, and your jaw grits. 

“It is a me problem, so I can’t keep buying you stuff you probably get for free up in Heaven!” You growl out, irritation with him flaring once more. Asshole is so ungrateful… Why did you even buy him anything? “Do you even have to pay rent in Heaven?” You then ask, and he laughs. 

“Fuck no!” He grins, before pausing. “Well, sorta. You get like, a free place and whatever, but if you want somethin’ bigger and better you gotta pay for it.” He explains, and you frown at that. 

“So, wait. You do gotta work in Heaven?” You blanch, because that sounds awful. Great, you have something to not look forward to even after you die, now. Well, if you want to Heaven, anyways… You have a guardian angel, so you assume that you will, but Adam is hardly angel material. In fact, you’re starting to wonder if this is a test from the Heavens, seeing how much good will you have to not snap and throttle your guardian…

“Sorta?” He gives the same response, picking at his teeth– Mask?-- With his pinky. He doesn’t even look at you. “You don’t gotta. You can just walk around and do whatever you want, but some stuff you gotta actually pay for. Luxuries, like certain entertainment, shops, establishments… You get the idea.” He finally looks at you, resting his hands on his stomach as he leans against the door of your car. 

You turn back ahead as the vehicle in front of you pulls forward. “Huh…” You mutter, thoughtful. Well, you hoped you could at least be good at something else in Heaven, because you were definitely not wanting to do the job you had currently up after crossing the pearly gates. You hand your card over to the cashier to pay, and put all the food in the front seat. Adam subtly reaches for his blizzard, which you slap his hand away subtly. No way you’re driving around with what would look like a floating ice cream to everyone else. He pouts, but doesn’t complain, and you drive off after you have everything. 

The distance from your apartment to the fast food place you just stopped at is short, and already worn out by today’s events, you just opt to turn on the radio and listen to music. Adam takes over, of course, turning it onto some barely withstandable hard rock as he jams out in the back seat with an air guitar. You try and not let any tired, resting bitch face take over, but it’s so, so difficult to. Once you park in your spot, it’s already decently late. It’s dark out, and you don’t see anyone else around, so you let Adam help you carry your food. 

You look up, able to see your balcony from where you’re standing, and grimace at the thought walking three stories. The elevator it is, then, you decide with a heavy sigh. “Alright, up ya go.” Adam suddenly speaks up, and you’re confused, until you feel an arm wrap around your middle. 

“What do you– meeeeeaaaannn!” You suddenly shriek out as his wings flare, and he pushes himself and you effortlessly upwards with a beat of them. Seconds later, you land on your balcony with him, trembling, cold and startled at the sudden interaction. 

“Theeeere ya go, sweet-tits, saved ya some time, didn’t I? I know, I know, I’m the greatest.” He grins, puffing out of existence, before he reappears inside of your house. He unlocks your sliding door, and you walk in, still more pale before and slow. “Pfft, you should see the look on your face. Hilarious. I’ll have to do that more often.”

“You– You know you can’t!” You sputter out, glaring at him as you set down the food you’re holding, putting your hands on your hips. He just looks at you, boredly, as he tosses some fries in his mouth. 

“Wassa big deal? Nobody saw.” He speaks through chewing, and you wrinkle your nose, turning around and shutting the door while you pull the blinds closed. 

“What if somebody did see, though!? And we didn’t even know! This is the age of technology, Adam, anyone could be filming for any reason!” You counter, watching in irritation as he flops down on the giant beanbag you have in your small living room in lieu of a couch. 

“Even if someone did see it, nobody would believe it. I know those fake ass videos that circulate all the time online of some mysterious shit happening which is obviously just not real.” He seems extremely unbothered by this, which is somewhat concerning. That meant either you were really getting up in arms about this for no reason, or he just didn’t want to admit to making a mistake. You’d heard the phrase ‘angels don’t make mistakes’ or something similar quite a few times from him. You just shoot him a glare as he waves a hand and magics over your remote as he flips the TV on, munching on the food he got. 

“Food’s gonna get cold if you don’t eat, babes.” He chirps out, flicking through channels, and you pinch the bridge of your nose and utter under your breath. You never win any arguments with him. Why do you even bother? With a sigh, you grab your food and sit next to him on the beanbag. It’s normally enough to fit at least three or four people, but with how large Adam is, it looks like it’s really just meant for two people. You sit cross legged as you eat, another silence finally lapsing between the both of you. Adam can’t shut up most of the time, and even while he’s eating he’s making quips at the show you’re watching. 

“Fuckin’ women argue so much, why did they make a show about it?” He comments while he chews, and you click the remote to see what you’re even watching with a roll of your eyes. The Real Housewives. Great. This one isn’t even set in your area. 

“I think it’s all fabricated.” You comment in response. Adam’s done with his food, eating his ice cream, and you’re almost finished with your main meal. 

“Why? Wouldn’t it be more interesting if it was real beef?” He scoffs, and you shrug. 

“Well, yeah, but rarely is it actually as entertaining as this.” You motion to the screen, grimacing as you see one of the women throw a fork at the other. This was so dumb. Adam seems to agree, as he snorts and changes the channel. 

When you’re both completely finished eating, you lounge with him. It’s a bit strange, you admit, having your supposed ‘guardian angel’ just relaxing with you. He’s a divine being; The first man! Yet he’s here, kicking back on your beanbag like he’s some buddy of yours. You don’t tell him to get out, though, because deep down, despite how much of an awful prick he can be… you kinda like the company. You have friends, sure, but they’re all busy with their own lives. Adam? You’re not entirely sure what his life in Heaven is like. You don’t know his responsibilities, but it must not be much if he can just come down here and kick it with you whenever. 

You try to drown these contemplative thoughts out with television, but you find it difficult to do as another pang lights your stomach. You groan out, shifting a bit, rubbing at the cramps. Right, you’d nearly forgotten about those. You should go and put something on for the blood, but… Goddamn you don’t wanna get up. Instead, you just roll around slightly on the beanbag, groaning, trying to get comfortable. Adam, blissfully, doesn’t say anything. At first, at least. When you finally moan out in pain, though, and your head slumps against his arm, he scoffs, lifting his arm to look down at you. Your head thumps against his side. 

“The fuck you makin’ so much noise for?” He complains, and you pout, mildly glaring at his crass attitude. 

“Told you earlier, on my period… Cramps reeaaallly blow.” You utter out, somewhat muffled due to your cheek resting against his side. 

“Sucks to suck, woman.” He sneers, and you resist the urge to bite him. Just barely. Your glare certainly says enough, though. 

“Please tell me there’s no periods in Heaven.” You sigh as you roll onto your back, peering up miserably at the angel next to you. 

“Nope.” He pops the ‘p’ in his response, and you sigh in relief. “Actually, I can just make it so you don’t have it anymore.” He suddenly mentions, and you gasp, sitting up to look at him. 

“What? Really?” You grin in excitement at the thought, and he looks at you slyly. 

“Yeeep. Only for about nine months at a time, though.” He looks back at his gloved nails, and you tilt your head in confusion. 

“That’s… Oddly specific. Why?” You ask, curious. He narrows his eyes at you, grin never leaving his face as he waggles his eyebrows at you. A heated warmth blossoms fiercely across your cheeks and body as you suddenly understand what he’s insinuating. 

“Stop being so horny!” You growl out, shoving him as he starts laughing, slapping you with his wing as you stumble to your feet. 

“Hey! You know how many chicks are lining up to ride original dick?” He finally huffs out after he’s finished with his laughing fit, pointing down at his crotch. 

“I can imagine not very many if you’re here pestering me, still.” You roll your eyes, and his wings flare out in anger at that as he gets up. 

“You got no fuckin’ idea! Bitches and groupies are lining up to see me after a show, and even on the streets. I’ve been looking after you for like– What– a few months? You haven’t gotten laid once, so you can cut the cool act and just start begging whenever you want. You’ll be thanking me after.” He insists, waving his arms about as his wings give a beat of frustration. It knocks over a paper mache piece one of your friends made for you, and nearly bowls your cat off of his feet as he comes strolling into the room, although he seems none the wiser to what the wind actually was. You just offer Adam a hard stare as you swoop down to pick up the paper mache, setting it neatly back where it was. 

“Is that even allowed?” You can’t help but to ponder, never having of really broached the topic with him. Sure, he was usually horny around you. Made innuendos and suggestive comments(occasional groping), but he’d never actually really tried anything. 

“Is what allowed?” He’s gotten distracted by your cat, squinting at him as he strolls about your living room, sticking his head into the now empty paperbag of one of your meals. 

“You fucking…” You try to think of what you are to him. You don’t know the term, so instead you just settle on, “Me?”

“I can do whatever the fuck I want. I’m Adam.” Comes his smug response, an equally smug look on his face as his arms cross and he peers down at you. Okay, that’s not a… Real answer, but you suppose you’re not going to get a real answer out of him. You open your mouth, before closing it, deciding to wave him off, uttering that you’ll be back. You head into your bathroom, finally grabbing something to help your blood flow. You also decide to take something to alleviate your cramps a bit, and when you walk back into your main room, you hear Adam. “Hey, pussy, that’s mine!” You walk over, seeing Adam crouched over your cat, glaring at him as he snacks on a fry from inside the bag. So much for being empty. 

He then deftly takes the fry from your cat, sticking his tongue out at him as the feline meows pitifully, confused at the fry dangling from nothing in front of him. “Hey, don’t be mean! He found that fair and square, give it back!” You counter, walking over and snatching the fry out of Adam’s fingers. The angel scowls at you as you toss the fry back down for your little boy to consume, and you pet him lovingly. 

“Don’t think a cat is supposed to eat that shit.” He grimaces, and you just shrug. 

“He can have a little treat. It’s okay.” You decide, picking up the rest of the empty bags and containers as you move to throw them away. “You staying the night or something?” You can’t help but to tease Adam. He doesn’t normally hang around you for this long. In fact, you’re pretty sure he’s only supposed to be here when you’re in real trouble, but you’re not entirely sure what defines that. Maybe he has some premonition about when you’ll get in trouble, so perhaps that’s why he’s sticking around. 

“Why, you want me to?” He arches his brows again, and you roll your eyes, not gracing him with a response. “No way, I got shit to do back up top. I’m important, you know, can’t just spend all the time hangin’ out with some mortal. Much as you’d like me to, I know I know.”

“Could’ve fooled me.” You utter under your breath, and before he has a moment to ask what you said, you pipe up, “Are you even allowed to be doing this? Just like, hanging out? And, no,” You start as he opens his mouth to reply. “I don’t want to hear ‘I’m Adam, I can do what I want’ because really that holds no ground.” 

“Uh, the fuck it doesn’t! It holds all the ground.” He scoffs. “You may hate the answer, but it’s the truth, babes. Heaven is way better than this shithole you live in, but sometimes it gets so booooring. You guys keep it fresh down here.” He grins, somewhat wicked as he advances towards you, before pausing. “Oh, shit, you know what you should do?” You offer him an uncertain look. “Go to a concert! Or festival! They fuckin’ rock down here.” He throws up the devil’s horns. 

“And… Why would I do that?” You frown. 

“So I can watch, duh.” He crosses his arms, and you just raise a brow.

“Can’t you just go fly to a concert somewhere and watch it?” You inquired, flopping back down on your beanbag with a grimace as another cramping spasm rips through your body. 

“Not really, nah. If I come down to Earth, I’m basically tied to you. Gotta stick around you within a certain area sorta deal.” He explains, and you make a small noise of surprise. You suppress the urge to say, ‘I thought you were Adam and could do whatever you wanted’, but you don’t because you don’t want him going off on a rant about it. 

“Well, I’ll think about it. Concerts aren’t really my thing.” You admit, trying to decide one what to watch the rest of the night. Your cat comes up, purring as he settles on your stomach, and you groan out at the pressure it applies. 

“You should make it your thing and stop being so fucking boring” He huffs. 

“If I’m so boring then why did you hang around me for so long today?” You stick your tongue out as part of your response, and Adam’s wings fluff up and flare at the accusation. He opens his mouth to respond, then closes it, eyes narrowing along with his brows. 

“Because… Free food, that’s why. Fuck you, later loser!” He flips you the bird again with both hands this time, sticking his own tongue out, before he’s gone in a puff of golden glitter. It sizzles around you, falling to the ground as it disperses, and you sigh out. You pet your cat, laying your head back on the beanbag. 

“...Hope you don’t think I’m crazy.” You rumble to your cat as you scratch him behind the ears. It’s just you and him, now, and you don’t know when Adam will pop up again. You realize, with a pang in your chest, that you miss him already. What a dangerous game you were playing, talking so freely with your divine guardian. 

#reader insert #hazbin hotel #hazbin adam #hazbin hotel adam #adam x reader #adam x you #hazbin adam x reader #reader #you

[thotsforvillainrights]

youre doing so good on all these asks and prompts bestie its a full course MEAL today, thank you 🙏🏻💕 pls take your time and dont push yourself too hard!

since you're on a Skeptic and Trumpet kick, could i request how Skeptic, Trumpet, and Re-Destro confess to their S/O? maybe with a sprinkle of long-term pining in there?

(I finally updated the AU's. Now back to your regularly scheduled askbox answering! I'm glad to start with this one because it's such a cute idea ahhh)

~How Skeptic/Trumpet/Re-Destro Confess~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

~Skeptic~

-I saw a post on here a while back by someone about Skeptic asking you out over email and I have not let go of it to this day. If anybody knows what I'm talking about, please @ the account for me! I mean it sounds ridiculous but I genuinely believe he would do something like that! Just hear me out, just picture it! So he's the type of man I believe would be angry for falling in love with you or falling in love to begin with. Up until now his life has been just himself and he's been just fine with that. He doesn't even have pets! His life lately has been dedication to Feel Good, the Liberation Army cause, and Re Destro. When he falls for you oh boy does he spend a long time in denial. He thinks he's doing a good job at fighting off his feeling by being mean to you but he doesn't take the time to even think about how he's always watching you or how he seems to hover when you're around. Or maybe how weird he feels when he realized he's searching through any and all information to do with you. He's way too awkward sometimes and decided it would be a great idea to confess to you through email (which you already know Chitose and Hanabata are going to tease him about). In his mind it makes sense! I mean I could go further into this but I really wish I could find that post that person made OMG. If you read it you'd be like..."yeah, I get it now."

~Trumpet~

Doesn't waste a second when he falls for you. I mean maybe for the first month he sits and observes to figure out if he just thinks you're attractive or that he genuinely loves you. By the end of the month he comes to the conclusion that he loves you and that you're his soulmate. He even starts considering marriage right away but Chitose helps bring him back down to reality. I've said it before and I'll say it a million times again: He falls HARD. I'm at full belief that he jumps all-in when he thinks he's in love. Once he's got his eyes set on you, believe me you'll know it. He's ask you out by gently grabbing your hands into his and kissing the back of them. He opens up to you and pours himself out. If that doesn't work then he's trying again and again, never laying off unless you specifically tell him you hate him (or don't want him). He'll do anything from writing love letters, to literally paying a plane to spell it out in the skies for you. He once showed up to your place in a limo with a trunk full of roses and balloons. He's very persistent when it comes to you. Just think, if he's being this dramatic with simply asking you to date him then imagine how it's gonna look when he decides to propose to you! If you guessed over the top then you guessed correctly...

~Re-Destro~

-Out of everyone listed above, he likely takes it the slowest and does it just right. I think he might have you believing he's just a close friend but the entire time he's falling even more in love with you. He takes you out to lunch often and offers himself up for advice if you ever need it. He invites you to things that he secretly considers dates, but he also asks the others to tag along so you won't get suspicious. He spends a lot of time thinking about you and about how he feels when you're around him. He wakes up one morning in his empty bed and realizes at that moment that he genuinely doesn't want this life for himself anymore. He wants that cheesy life where he wakes up next to you or when he comes home to you waiting for him. He wants grocery shopping/running errands together. He wants gentle touches cuddled up under thick blankets while listening to each others breathing and the crackle of the candle burning nearby. He wants that moment like in romance movies when the two finally share that first kiss and sparks fly. He resolves to finally admit his feelings to you so he calls you up and invites you out to dinner that night. You (thinking that the others will be there) quickly accepts his offer. You're a little surprised when you find out they're not there and it's just him. Realization sets in after you ask him and he tells you "No, it's just supposed to be us." You nod and open yourself up to everything that he pours out at you. When he finishes he can feel his heart beat out of his chest. He figures if he were to die in this moment then he wouldn't regret a thing if you turned him down because he would've been blessed to have you even listen to his confession. Lucky for him you accept his heart and from that very second he decides that he'll give his all to make sure you're happy with him no matter what.

#Headcanon #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #tomoyasu chikazoku #skeptic bnha #koku hanabata #trumpet bnha #rikiya yotsubashi #re destro bnha #mla #meta liberation army

[toseeclearly]

i deleted everything by accident

I deleted everything by accident, and now I am grieving.

It's not that these things were important, technically. I deleted a tumblr I barely used or looked at; a place where I would start to write a post, get cold feet, and then leave it in the drafts until I no longer wanted to do anything with it. That's all it was, a graveyard to things I was never going to complete, ideas I'd given up on, plans I never followed through with.

But still, the day they rip the memorial down is still sad, and you'll forever walk by that lamp post and remember that, at one point, there were flowers here.

So I guess I just... use this how I used to use the internet: like a diary. I was once a dedicated blogger, back in the days when being a "blogger" had some sort of caché (I think if you said that now, someone would assume you were using some sort of throwback term, like asking aloud if anyone knew of a video store they could check out. Are there any video stores left? I don't know, and I don't feel like googling right now). I wanted to be a writer, a blogger, I wanted to be like all the cool teens I followed who had custom webpages with sections where they'd post about their thoughts and other sections for cool things they did with their friends. I wanted to be their friend and be posted on their cool blog! But this was the early 2000s, where the only way to contact these people was to either stalk a forum they might be on, or email them directly, and both of those always felt unappealing. So instead, I wrote about my life and my friends, read my friends blogs, hoped to be cool enough to be included. Hundreds of posts, stories and essays and quiz results and absolutely atrocious poetry, we wrote so much, I wrote so much. And all of it is gone, now. Blogs long deleted, websites no longer active, everything lost to digital decay. Or, if you're me, you delete your tumblr by accident while massively tired and only realise too late what you've done. More decay, more insignificant pieces of the web burned away. I'm the only one who cares, but that's fine. I can... rebuild. Or just use this space for my own terrible navel gazing.

I write a lot. I have a fair amount of published work, but I also write a lot that never sees the light of day (and probably never should, mostly for quality control issues). I spent a lot of nights writing Parkdale Haunt, a lot of very late evenings hammering out page after page after page until my eyes hurt and my brain was trying to escape my skull, but it felt good. It was a good time. There's several episodes where I wrote the first draft in a complete haze, like when you're running a marathon (NOTE: I have never run a marathon, but like, stick with me here, I'm just extrapolating from my time as a long distance runner) (SECOND NOTE: I hated long distance running and quit to focus on sprinting and hurdling, which I loved, because sprinting is designed for people who want all their endorphins RIGHT NOW and hurdling is designed for masochists, and the 400m hurdles is the perfect race if you just want to punish yourself for any feeling of hubris that you've ever had in your entire curséd life) and you're just zoning out and pushing through any thought you might have that says hey man, what if you just - oh, I don't know - lied down on that patch of grass over there? Yeah, that would be sick as fuck. Writing feels like that for me sometimes, like hey, wouldn't it be nice to just go to bed? Yeah, bed is good. But then I would look down and there'd be 15 pages in front of me, and I'd feel... great. And also exhausted and vaguely headachy, but great. Then I would just spam Emily and/or Ian with screenshots of scenes at random times. Being in my vicinity means you're getting unhinged screenshots at some point.

So I've been writing again. I've got two scripts going for a new show, here's to hoping it works out. And I guess I can write here when I need/want to procrastinate. I don't have much of a footprint left after I threw my fucking shoes in the ocean.

All this has done is made me miss hurdling.

#blog post #parkdale haunt #sure

[palettesofrenaissance]

“Allure, Gravity, Magnetism:” the reincarnated soulmate au

Although his face is neutral and tone leveled, there is definitely something hiding behind Sam’s carefully chosen words. They’re like smooth-sounding tools meticulously chiseling away at Bucky’s carefully constructed wall, slipping between the cracks and prying them open further, wider, allowing more words to slip through.

Sam knows something.

Sam sucks his teeth, picks up the cooking tongs and smacks it, hard, in the palm of one gloved hand. Looks to the stove, then takes an empty pot to a sink to fill with water. “Okay, since we’re going there by talking about past relationships—it’s your turn!”

“No, we’re not going there.”

“Yes we are, Tin Man! There’s a heart in there, somewhere. Talk. Who was your last ex?”

“I’m not gonna talk about that.”

“Sure you must’ve had some. At least one.”

“I didn’t…”

“You didn’t have not one crush growing up? Remember that one time at that wings restaurant bar? What about that lady you said you used to like back in the thirties? Bet she was some pretty blonde singer, wasn’t she? You said she was a singer, right?”

“She was a singer… She wasn’t blonde, though…”

Chapter 10: up on ao3 now

#sarah x bucky #I think the posting emails are running late again so here you go if you're interested #one day I will make a proper series of edits #marvel au #mcu au #the physical world and our place in it #palettewrites

[dekuspet]

Devil's Whisper

Eijiro Kirishima x Reader x Katsuki Bakugo

Genre: Angst

Summary: Eijiro is invited by the devil to cheat so he can finally have you.

Notes: Images are not mine. Credits to the rightful owners.

Please read.

I'm back! I'm so sorry for those who are waiting for the update for Oblivion, Save me and Lust for Power. A big typhoon hit us and we just got our electricity back. Flood didn't reach our house but unfortunately, our farm is ruined.

We are somehow still lucky because other part of Philippines is 15 ft under flood right now. Lots are dying and rescues are very limited. If you have any means to help, like donations, you can contact me. I'll post more details about this dilemma here. Read Devil's whisper below.

-

"Come on man, what are you so afraid of?" Katsuki said as he nudged Eijiro.

The two are at the bar, drinking.

"You know I love Y/n. I don't want anyone but her. Man, she's perfect." Eijiro shook his head.

"It's a one-time thing. And you said Y/n like it wild, right? You can learn with that sexy bitch. Don't you want to be the dominant and satisfy Y/n even once?", Katsuki insisted.

You and Eijiro are together for three years. You met him when he's brought by Katsuki, your friend from middle school, to your party. You find him very cute so you asked him on a date and that blooms your relationship with him.

Eijiro love you so much. He never had someone look at him like he's a gold to treasure. You treat him well and you boosts his confidence a lot.

"Don't you think that one day, Y/n will just get tired with a submissive one like you?"

Eijiro had thoughts with what Katsuki said. His anxiety ate him. Eijiro is contented with you and he is scared to lose you.

"But what if Y/n caught me?" a devious smile arise from Katsuki.

"Don't worry, I will not tell her."

-

"Pebble I'm home!" Eijiro hugged you as he saw you sitting at the sofa. You hugged him back.

"How's my boy? How's your day?", he sniffed your neck. Your scent always amuse him. He don't know what your perfume is but he's sure that you are the only person who smells like that.

"Can you do me a favor pebble?", Eijiro said.

"Hmm?", you hummed. He goes near your ear and whispered.

"Let me fuck you like the man I am.", you're surprised with his words but a smile arise from your lips.

"Show me what you got there, manly Eijiro."

-

The supposed to be one time thing is repeated many times. Eijiro didn't notice how Katsuki smiles everytime he asked him to cover everything so you will not be suspicious.

"Hmm, soon."

-

"Red riot is cheating on you. Go to this address if you want to confirm."

You clench your jaw when you saw an email again. You received these email a lot of times and you are becoming more and more suspicious. Those emails you received are sync to the time that Eijirou goes home late. It's always because he's having overtime at work or he's out with Katsuki.

This is the first time that you called your best friend as you believe Eiji can never cheat on you. Eijiro is too soft to do that.

"Moshi moshi?", Katsuki spoke from the phone.

"Hey Katsu, is Eiji with you?", Katsuki became silent for a moment.

"Huh? We went home early today. Is he not home yet?", Katsuki spoke softly.

"R-really? Okay, I'll call you back.", you ended the call and rushed to the address.

-

"D-deeper. Fuck."

"Yes, you like that bitch? You like my long cock?"

"Yes daddy, my pussy is only yours."

You bit your gums as you heard the noise. You don't want to look in the dark, but you need to.

"Eiji..", you gasp as your tears started to roll down your eyes as you saw him inside an unknown woman, in the fucking dark alley, fucking like bunnies in rut.

Eiji's eyes widen. He don't know what to do.

"Y/n, let me explain.", Eiji shoved the bitch and she ran away.

"Explain what Kirishima? There's nothing to explain here. I thought you're different. I didn't mind those emails I received because I trust you so much! Does this boost your ego? Huh? Your confidence? Then go! I am not stopping you. And you can't stop me too. I'm leaving you. Take the fucking house, I don't need it.", you run away as Eiji keeps on chasing you but you just shrugged him off.

"Y/n, I'm sorry. I love you. Please don't leave me. Please. Y/n. I can't live without you.", Eiji hugged you. Your legs are becoming jelly.

"I'm not your fucking oxygen. If you need my cunt, there's a lot of women who'll want to fuck you. If you did love me, you'll never do this. You just want me for you to feel good. Let me fucking go.", Eijiro's mind is clouded and that is the time that you escaped from his grasp.

'Y/n, come back.', Eiji want to shouts but he stayed silent in the alley as he's trying his best to think of ways to make it up to you.

You ran to your car and you called Katsuki.

"Hey. Can I stay at your house? I'll bring us drinks."

-

"I didn't know he could do that i am so blinded by his soft side.", you shove another glass of beer down your throat.

You already finish the beers you brought there, trying to forget what you see but you couldn't. You now hate the fact that you have high tolerance.

"I'm sorry, I introduced him to you. I didn't know he's a dumb shit.", he patted your back.

"It's my fault. I fell for his antics that fucking liar.", you closed your fist as you look at the empty bottles in front of you.

"Do you want more? I have beers at kitchen. Wait here.", he didn't wait for your reply as he goes to his kitchen.

He brought beers and he poured you a drink. He looks at you intently as you shove it down your throat again.

"That fucking fucker.", you said and Katsuki laughed.

Suddenly, you got dizzy.

"Oh god, cool! I'm finalllyyyy drunk!", you laughed. You tried to stand but you fell down the carpet.

"Let me bring you to the bed. Rest now Y/n." Katsuki said as he lift you toward the bed.

"Y/n.", you hummed.

"I love you.", Katsuki whispered.

"I love you too..", Katsuki's eyes shined.

"Eijiro.", his jaw clenched at your words.

"I'll make you forget him."

"Reallyyyyy? Will you not cheat on meee?", you childishly spoke.

The last thing you remembered is the soft bed and the sight of Katsuki over you.

"Everything goes as planned. I'm taking back what's supposed to be mine. You're mine, Y/n.", Katsuki kissed you.

-

I'm sorry I can't write smut well so I skipped it :(

Want part 2??

#mha #bnha #bnha angst #bnha imagines #my hero academia #bnha fanfiction #mha angst #mha imagines #mha kirishima #bnha kirishima #bnha x reader #boku no hero academia #kirishima eijirou #kirishima imagine #kirishima x reader #bakugou x kirishima #kirishima x y/n #kirishima angst #eijirou #eijirou x you #eijirou kirishima imagine #bnha bakugou #bakugou x y/n #bakugou katsuki #bakugou angst #villain bakugou #mha katsuki #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugo katsuki x reader #katsukibakugou

[jeonandjoonie]

Just One Day

posted on wattpad and this tumblr only.

You have a crush on your boxing T.A. college au. Jungkook X Reader.

word count: ~10,900k

W: NONE

================================================

Kids.

You couldn’t believe that for your last semester in college you would have to take a physical education class. You still curse your advisor when you remember the day.

You were walking happily to your appointment prepared to turn in your graduation application only to be told that you were not set to graduate. Your previous advisor didn’t notice the unfulfilled requirement. You almost cried and immediately went to your apartment to search up any physical Ed classes that would satisfy the requirement.

Of course being so late in registering, all the basic classes such as Yoga, Gym, and Dance were filled. You looked over the list, even weight training had a waitlist of 5. You were beginning to feel hopeless as you saw Judo and Tennis having a waitlist as well. There must be an open one!!

And how much your heart delighted when you noticed a class that was full but had no waitlist! Your eyes immediately crossed over to the left to see what class it was.

Boxing.

Taken back, you pushed back the stress from clouding your mind. Thinking of having to not only work out but be punched down Sighing, you quickly clicked on the class to register accepting your doom. Another couple hundred dollars invested into your degree, taking a class you were not interested in.

With the start of the semesters you passed through all your classes easily already feeling like a master in your discipline. You walked happily from class to class. You were especially happy that your internship and student work study all fit perfectly within your schedule.

You plopped yourself onto your tiny single bed. In a few hours you’ll have to get ready for your first day of Boxing. 3-hour class, two times a week, it made you want to cry. Your classes started at 6 and it was past 4 when you got to your apartment, so you quickly went to your kitchen to eat. You wanted your food to be digested before class to prevent yourself from vomiting.

You settled for some leftover mango rice and smoked salmon that accumulated from days before. Neither were yours, but you and your three other roommates agreed that when food has been in the fridge for more than two days it’s a free for all.

"Hey, __" your roommate, literally roommate which you share your room with, patted your head as she passed you. "Do you want to do our nails and talk about our 5-year plans and then eat ice cream?" She shouted from your shared bedroom.

" Sorry, can’t!" You shouted back to her, "I got that boxing class tonight!" You continued to shout even though she was now in front of you. You wanted the whole world to hear your misery.

"Oh, that sounds like fun!" She responded leaning onto the counter

" Ugh. Please, it’s going to be such a waste of time. Punching people is one thing but having to let someone punch me sounds so annoying" you complained putting your dishes in the sink.

"Stop crying, I’m sure they won’t have you fight anyone. I bet it’ll just be like learning posture or something. It’ll probably just be the basics".

"True... Anyways do you have any clothes I can borrow real quick? I didn’t have time to buy any"

"Sure, What’s the dress code"

“I dunno, the guy just said casual and comfortable for the first day", you thought it over " just sweats, I have a t-shirt. Please!"

When you asked for sweats you didn’t think it was going to be an issue. Sweats are pretty much one size fits all. You should have known better as you looked at yourself in your floor length mirror. Minah's gray sweats were clinging to your butt and legs.

"Oh my god Minah, what is your size? a size negative zero, I feel like I’ll explode. Did you get this at the kids’ section".

"Shut up, those are the only ones I have…they kind of shrunk when I washed them" she mumbled the last part. You knew Minah was skinnier than you, but you didn’t expect it to be this much maybe just a size or two. "they don’t even look that bad, they fit really snug on me after the wash".

Seeing your disappointing stare, she quickly fusses over you. "Fine. Bend down, run, jump or do whatever boxers do. Let’s see how they look".

You jumped, kicked, and ran in place. You dropped it low a couple times to feel the strain on your thighs and butt.

"I mean…I guess they’re okay" you studied yourself again "you know what, it’s no big deal it’s like I’m wearing yoga pants"

Minah laughed "You’re so right! why are we even discussing this?"

You looked at her putting on a pout "they look like yoga pants, but they feel like they’re about to rip. Look, my pockets are sticking out!"

Finally getting annoyed with you, Minah sighed loudly throwing her hands up in a dramatic flair "Wear them, don’t wear them. Hurry up cause it.." she looks at her rose gold wrist watch with faux diamonds around the frame, the one you gifted her for Christmas. Yes, you are proud of your gift. "Oh my gosh, __ you need to go it's 5:50! Isn’t your class at 6?" Minah looked at you with wide eyes.

"What?!" you squeaked. You didn’t want to be late, you couldn’t given the fact that you were on the waitlist. You can’t give off a bad impression now. "Oh my…oh my gosh" you muttered to yourself quickly, slipping on a black t-shirt. You grabbed your bag and ran towards the front door to slip on your black shoes. Which was a struggle and you later realized it would have been easier and maybe faster to untie them and then put them on.

You reached out for the door handle only to have it hit you against your forehead.

"Oh my gosh" three voices chorused at the same time.

Sohee your other roommate gasped as she grabbed your arm to inspect your injury. However, you simply brushed her away as you were already late. "__, wait are you okay, I’m so sorry"

"It's fine, I’m good!” you yelled back as you ran the two blocks to your campus. only to getting slightly lost as you turned a right and not a left. You didn’t even have time to blame it on your possible concussion. Can you get a concussion? you don’t know. But you almost threw up with nerves when you realized you made the wrong turn.

You need to get into this class. Your graduation depended on it. Although you’re sure they will squeeze you in when they realize you’re a senior, you still want to be in good standing with the instructor if you planned on slacking off in class.

Reaching the gymnasium doors, you tried to control your breathing. You haven’t run this fast since you had to run miles in middle school. You felt dizzy and tried hard not to think about your burning calves.

Inside looked nothing like you thought it would. You imagined dark lights, punching bags, and maybe some weights. However, there were only large mats laid out on the floor. A small group of students seated in front of what you figured is the instructor. You quickly ducked your head trying to hide yourself as you sat down in the back. There were two other people standing next to him wearing head gear and strapping on boxing gloves.

"And who is the new intruder?" the instructor, Mr. Kang or Mino, questioned out loud.

You shyly smiled (or what you thought was a cute shy smile) when in reality you looked like a nervous wreck, trying to hide the fact that your legs were burning and you were breathing too hard. Hmm? was that sweat running down your neck.

"I’m ___, I should be on the waitlist"

Mino made a huge show of flipping the pages of his clipboard. "Ah yes __, I see you here. Well if you still want this class you’re in luck because three people dropped out this morning"

Even though you were practically hyper venting in your seat and you're pretty sure the sweatpants were cutting your circulation. You felt such a relief wash over you.

“Just don’t make a habit out of being late, 25 minutes is unacceptable, 5 more and I would have kicked you out. Next time make sure to email me beforehand"

If you didn’t look like a nervous wreck before, you sure did now. You nodded your head too afraid to speak from the embarrassment.

"Come get your syllabus after class, we’ve already gone over it”, he looked around “Everyone this is why I stress that you should attend every class and be here on time, every moment is important" he clapped his hands, “now for the fun part: the demonstration”. He turned towards the two people standing at his side, “like I said these are two of my excellent students who are in boxing III, they volunteered their time to be here and help me teach this course. so please give them the same respect you will give me" he turned towards them once more giving them a nod as a sign to begin. The two guys started to face each other and sway around.

"These are more advanced moves, we won’t be learning these in this course but I want you to see..."

The instructor's voice drifted off as you watched the two guys start to move and jab at each other. They were fast and moving so quick on their feet. Your eyes lingered on to their legs. Interesting…very interesting. With these types of demonstrations maybe this class wouldn’t be so bad.

The two guys continued to "punch" each other bouncing in their spot. "Whoos" can be heard from the students around you who knew what was happening. It did look like the one in all black was beating the one in a blue shirt. The guy in blue was larger than the other which says a lot since they both look fit.

You were startled out of analyzing as Mino clapped his hands, "Okay. Okay, guys that’s enough thank you".

He applauded and everyone followed along. As did you, poking your head in between the seated bodies in front of you trying to get a better look of the guys. The guy in all black had tattoos on his hand and arm. The one in blue had a tattoo running up his neck. You were curious to see how it would spread out on his body. When he fully took off his head gear, wow….

Oh….

Wow…

You were amazed. These guys are so handsome. They are the straight definition of charming. You almost wanted to reprimand him for risking his stunning features. He gave a boxy smile "Hi, everyone my name is Taehyung".

“Hi Taehyung” a couple of aspiring class clowns responded back.

"Hi, I’m Jungkook" the voice next to him said.

Your eyes turned to him. The one in all black. To say your heart stopped would be an understatement because you are sure your brain cells did to. You froze in your spot, zoning in on his pretty face. Noticing the way his eyes crinkle despite his attempt to look serious. The charm and absolute power that oozed out of him was no intimidation to you, for your newfound adoration for his aura and beauty captivated you more. So much that you are willing to freeze in the spot if it resulted in you taking him in.

You continued to stare at Jungkook. This time zoning in on his lips, not yet picking up on his squinted eyes trying to meet yours for he felt you blunt stare and felt slightly amused. Jungkook, what a guy, what a man, what a-

“Okay class, let’s begin some basic moves everybody! Get to the mats".

Upon hearing more chatter and the squeaks of shoes, like on autopilot your body stood up. You were out of your trance once you realized you were staring at the back of Jungkook's neck. You quickly got into a spot in the back corner wanting a place where no one will see if you happened to rip your sweats or see your lame attempt at following along. You tried to make sure you have a view on that Jungkook guy, but blocking your view was a couple other people. You didn’t even have the privilege of seeing his calf. You decided to just admit defeat and listen to Mino. The class began with basic exercises that seemed even more difficult than the jumping jacks and squats you did in your room earlier.

"Hey are you alright?". You jumped back upon hearing a voice at your side, "Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you, are you good?"

It was Taehyung.

"Huh, wha- why?.. no, no I’m good"

"Okay it just seemed like you were struggling a bit”

"No I’m fine. Everything is fine…haha" you said as you lunged your leg forward like everyone else did to show him you were right on track. Can he notice the agony on your face that was caused by the ridiculous sweats?

“How about your forehead?” he asked, pointing to his own, upon seeing the confusion in your eyes.

“OH” you exclaimed a little too loudly, placing a hand on your forehead.

Taehyung gave you a short smile and a short nod as he jogged up to his spot in front of your section.

How considerate. As the exercises began you were now aware of Taehyung eyes. He tried to act like he was casually glancing at you and not keeping an eye on you. You would love to say it was due to that fact that he thought you were cute, but you knew it was because of the sweat that now adorned your face and the puffs that escaped your mouth. You haven’t exercised properly in ages.

As you continued your moves you were beginning to feel itchiness from the band around your ankles. You lifted the band as much as you can, only to be horrified with the deep red marks imprinted around your ankles. You looked up in shock meeting Taehyung's eyes. He immediately rushed to your side .

“Are you crazy?” He asks you with wide eyes “You need to go change”

“I’m okay” you tried keeping your voice hushed as to contour Taehyung's loud exclamation that had people around you turning their heads.

“No, this is bad,” Taehyung said, trying to find Mino to gain his attention.

“No, No, I’m fine” you hiss at Taehyung “Go away”.

Taehyung ignores you as he stands at high alert waiting for Mino to come to your side. You noticed Jungkook trailing behind him.

As the two men approached, Taehyung simply pointed at your ankles which were lamely covered by your hands.

Jungkook rushes to your side and tries to lift your sweats to see the damage done. If you weren’t so mortified by the attention given by everyone in the class, you would have swooned at his proximity.

“I’m fine” you mumble.

“No,” Mino says, meeting Jungkook’s eye “you should go home. Class is almost finished anyways”.

Feeling defeated your get up to your feet keeping your eyes on the ground. Being this close to them you realized how small you are. You hid behind Jungkook’s body to hide from your class's attention.

“I’m okay” you try to reason with Mino, “just a little tight” you tried to laugh.

“Miss?”

“__”

“___” Mino repeated, “I’m responsible for you in this class and I won’t allow for any injury no matter how small or big. Please, you're excused to go home”.

Slumping your shoulders and keeping your head to the ground you sighed, “Okay”.

In any other situation you would have taken this as a fortunate luxury, a blessing in disguise, but since Jungkook was witness to this (and Taehyung) you felt embarrassed. You didn’t want them to think of you as dumb. I mean you are leaving a boxing class early due to an injury caused by your tight sweats.

“and ___,” he called out to you as you made your way to the door ,”please come to class on time and be properly dressed”.

Yeah, this had to be one of the dumbest moments in your life.

You grumbled your way to your second class of boxing. After the first class, you went home and cried to your roommates about how embarrassing it was. Although you didn’t have time to wallow in your embarrassment due to the difficulty of peeling off the sweats. The girls helped you lather ointment on your red marks. The stinging and itchiness can now be felt with the cool air hitting your skin. You and Minah were scolded by Tara, your other roommate, for putting yourself in danger in “cutting off your damn ankles!”. You tried to protest only to be hushed by Sohee. With the way things were that night it would seem like you and Minah were the kids to your mothers Tara and Sohee. So, to fit into your new role you stuck out your tongue at both of their backs as they left your room and Minah tried to suppress her giggles.

You really didn’t want to go to the next class, but that degree was on the line. What would be your excuse? That you were publicly embarrassed in front of your class?

This time around you made sure to buy some sweats and cute shiny shorts. You will be prepared. Well not that prepared, as you slipped on the shorts you noticed how you didn’t even shave. So, you had to go back to the black sweats you brought.

To your massive egos surprise, no one seemed to care or remember about you. You made sure to arrive 10 minutes early and found yourself with three other early birds. Not even Mino or his helpers were here. You felt a little ridiculous but it’s better than being late. So, you sat against the wall scrolling through your phone waiting for the time to pass. It was 4 minutes before class when the chatter in the gym began to get louder. You looked up to see that everyone was here including your instructor. You remembered that you had to get the syllabus but now he was surrounded by eager students talking about God knows what. You are aimlessly glancing around trying to find a chance where your instructor could be alone. You slowly made your way closer to the group of seated students. You spotted Jungkook talking to Taehyung. They were also getting crowded by students. You watched how Jungkook walked over to the mats with one of the students and began to demonstrate something with his feet. Your guessing it’s his feet with how everyone is staring at his feet and he keeps looking down as he talks. You are admiring the way he moves his pretty lips as he talks when your vision of him is once again blocked by somebody. A boxy smile. A handsome smile. Taehyung.

You watch him walk over to you with a smile on his face as he waves a sheet of paper in his right hand.

“You need this” he states handing you the class syllabus.

“Yes. Thank you” you reach out for the paper. Your eyes skimmed through the paper making mental notes of the exam dates and random quizzes.

To your surprise you felt Taehyung still standing next to you. Feeling shy all of a sudden you focused more on the text.

“So… why boxing?” he suddenly asks with a gleam in his eye. He stared at you waiting for an answer.

“Why not?” you challenge him, “am I not boxing material?”

“I never said that” Taehyung defends himself, “just trying to make conversation to avoid having to…” he nudges back to where all the students are surrounding Jungkook.

You stop yourself from snorting, “I need it to graduate”

“Oh, you’re a senior?” he asks with interest.

“Yup, with a physical requirement I didn’t know I needed till the last minute”.

“So, this was the only option” Taehyung looks at you with pity understanding the lack of enthusiasm in your voice as you tell him your sad tale.

“It’ll be fun” he says with a smile” just look like you're trying and you’ll pass”.

You shrug and give him a smile. He was nice.

“Listen you don’t have to try hard and with everyone else you’ll be average. Trust me, this is my second year helping the beginner’s course. I’ve seen worse. A lot of freshmen who are over their heads”.

You laughed at that “It’s cute though, right?” you joked with him.

“Yeah, it’s cute, until they hurt themselves. All fired up kids,” Taehyung thought for a moment,

“actually it's embarrassed freshmen and then fired up second years that think they matured overnight or something”

You laughed at his analogy, remembering the cockiness that came from some of your classmates of sophomore year.

“You’re so right” you said, clapping your hands laughing.

Taehyung laughed along with you, “honestly though I wouldn’t mind going back. To be a bit naïve. Thinking of graduating makes me nervous”

“aww” you cooed at him reaching over to pat his arm.

Taehyung rolls his eyes, this time at you.

“What are your plans?” you ask him.

“Art Courier”

“Art” you ask surprise.

“Yea” he smiles, “I love it. I’m also volunteering at an art gallery downtown. Its local art, it’s nice”

“So why are you nervous?”

He looks at you, “Aren’t you?”

You shrugged, “I don’t know, I mean I got an internship out of town. I’m hoping to stay there for a short while. Then I want to come back to Kim Corp.”

He smiles at you, “Those are big plans”.

“Yeah… but yeah, I guess I’m nervous but like an exciting kind” you tilt your head, “like butterflies or dragonflies in my stomach”

“Dragon flies? that’s new” he chuckles, “mine are like crashing waves so sometimes it gets nauseating”, he pouts slightly thinking hard, “it’s exciting”. He sighs, “the truth is I’m applying for a master's and I just turned in my last application, so it’s this waiting period”.

“Ahhh, I see” you pat his shoulder once more giving him a smile, “good luck!”

Taehyung smiles back at you turning his full body to face you “thanks, you too”.

“Taehyung!”

Taehyung's name being called interrupted your mutual understanding of senior nervousness and friendship that was forming between the two of you. You lifted your head to the voice that interrupted such a sweet moment. Your eyes were ready to squint at the rude person, but they only softened upon finding the irritated face of Jungkook.

“Oops, got to go, seems like those fired up sophomores are getting to him” Taehyung whispers to you before he jogs up to a furrowed brow Jungkook who is still surrounded by eagerly waiting students. You wait for him to possibly shift his glance towards you. Readying a reassuring and “haha, yikes'' face to show him. However, he kept his gaze locked on Taehyung till he arrived at his side. You pout as you give up and stuff your syllabus into your bag.

Later that evening while the class was practicing a two step footwork you notice Jungkook teaching a student a few rows ahead of you. You watch carefully as he slowly makes his way down to your back corner. Is this your time? The moment in which you have him all alo-on-ne, to have a “private conversation" with him. You hoped. Jungkook was examining the student in front of you. You were next. You lowered your head focusing on your feet. You tried to remain calm even though the anticipation of talking to him was weighing down on you. You stole a quick glance at his feet, they were headed towards you. Here it goes.

“Hey Jungkook!”

Oh my gosh.

“Jungkook, Am I doing it right?”

You’ve got to be kidding me.

You lifted your head to see Jungkook making his way to the kid next to you. There Jungkook goes helping those eager hogging students that take any second with Jungkook away from you. Should you also feign ignorance to the movements in class? Even though you’re sure you probably really do need the extra attention. However, those kids just want to be praised by the “cool" Jungkook. You just want to talk to him.

The following weeks had no progress both with your boxing and with Jungkook. Thankfully your friendship with Taehyung grew as you both would be catching up with each other before classes. And you’re pretty sure you’ve seen Jungkook try to make his way over to you guys only to be stopped by some over achievers. You once asked Taehyung why he doesn’t teach the kids only for him to say he doesn’t need the experience unlike Jungkook who is majoring in Exercise Science (and a minor in art, which is where they meet and become friends). You only huffed in response and told him to give him a break. Taehyung just shrugged and went back on his phone. The talks with him were fine. Taehyung had good humor and amazing story telling skills, once in a while he would reveal subtle information about Jungkook. You would try to slyly ask him questions about Jungkook. You found yourself knowing a little about him every day.

One of the most amazing days though was when you were coming out of the bathroom after class and you overheard Taehyung’s unforgettable laugh and Jungkook’s -surprising- high pitched laughter. You walked slowly towards the divine laughter. You had to hide yourself behind a pillar when you saw them stop before an elevator.

“Those sophomores are so competitive! Hmmm… It reminds me of someone” Taehyung says jokingly, tapping his finger on his chin.

Jungkook shoves him playfully.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding” Taehyung raises his hands in defeat before Jungkook could put him into a headlock. Their rough playing is stopped with the "ding" sound of the elevator doors.

The "ding" also reminds you of what you were doing: hiding behind a pillar like a loser and overheating these guys. At this point it was odd since you were actually friends with one of them. I mean you did have Taehyung’s number and he would occasionally text you to tell you when he (or Jungkook) would not be in class.

You slowly inched your foot, not trying to make noise. You were ready to leave but halted when you heard Jungkook’s voice as they headed inside the elevator.

“So, what did you and __ talk about this time?”

HUH

Did he?

“Oh, I told her about your obsession with banana milk”

“Taehyung!”

Is all you heard before the doors closed.

Okay… what was that about?

Did they talk about you?

Was this an ongoing thing? Taehyung never told you about Jungkook’s supposed obsession with banana milk (cute by the way). Does this mean anything?

You groan as you make your way back to your apartment. Your head was spinning Did he…or did he not? Or did Taehyung just tell him once about all your “interesting” conversations that

Jungkook just routinely started asking him about it?

Your heart thumped at all the possibilities.

Whatever the reason it seemed he had an okay opinion about you. Right? I mean the best outcome you can hope is to be his friend because from what you see in class, and what you’ve heard from Taehyung, Jungkook does seem like a cool and genuine guy. And you’re not doing him (or Taehyung) any justice by eavesdropping on their conversations and following them. At that moment you decided to stop your shy approach and borderline creepy behavior towards him. You were an adult for goodness sake not a love-struck teen. You were going to be more direct!

Your heart raced miles at your final decision.

The next couple of days you began your new resolution by approaching Jungkook first. Your conversations weren’t as complex nor were they as comfortable as with Taehyung. A light tension always seemed to linger as if you both had your own elephants roaming around the room. You ignored it as much as you could. You were grateful for when Taehyung was around to break the tension. This would lead to the three of you to develop a more easy-going conversation. You were just happy that you were able to learn things about Jungkook directly and not through a second source.

All this progress seemed to have gone down the drain one night when you were practicing a new defensive pose. Jungkook came up to you to slightly adjust your arms into the proper distance from your face and body. He smiles afterwards, urging you to feel the difference. You proudly do your complete pose and suppress a giggle when his smile widens. He’s so mesmerizing. Mino was out of the gymnasium, quickly running off saying he need to go to his office. So, you took this opportunity to have Jungkook all to yourself. You were less reserved around him now and were ready to break some more of the barriers between you two. It starts with you two laughing over Taehyung's obvious lie of pretending to be busy. He’s looking over some papers on the clipboard at the front of the matts. You wanted to see Jungkook laugh again as he jokingly comments on the students in front of Taehyung who are trying to get his attention.

“It’s all these fired up Sophomores” you began, hushing your voice as if telling him a secret.

“they’re so competitive and eager to please as if they are being paid to be here. All these little kids will soon face the real world and realize that no one cares”.

Jungkook nervously places his hand behind his neck, “Some of them have potential...”, he hesitantly mutters.

You snort, “potential or not. All little kids, sorry, sophomores are the same. They are all so overly passionate. I feel bad for them once they realize that there will always be someone better, prettier, and bigger than them out there. Haven’t we learned that by now?”.

You turn to Jungkook upon seeing his straight face. You must admit it wasn’t one of your best attempts of comadeire, but the way he was acting seemed like you offended his mother. You were about to apologize and voice your concern when Jungkook nervously laughs.

“Yeah, well…” He chuckles again defeatedly. “…there’s always someone better…”.

“Jungko-“

“I see you have all been working diligently as I was gone! Thank you! As a reward I think we should run a few laps around the gym”.

Jungkook skedaddles away at the voice of Mino. You’re left confused, pondering over your conversation. Can he not stand unfunny people? Were you really that bad? Did he find you to be some bitter old bully?

Once the class is over you jog up to Taehyung and Jungkook before they could get onto the elevators.

You wanted to make sure you were good with Jungkook. You knew you would be up all weekend trying to figure out what went wrong. You know it was something you said. Did he not like your joke? were you being a bit too mean? You didn’t mean it too much. It was just something Taehyung always joked about, so you thought it would be okay to do so as well. Making your way up to them you say the first thing that comes to your mind

“Hey, are you guys going to the Senior Party?” This senior party was for seniors only (unless you were a plus one) hosted by all the frats of school. They all come together to make a huge block party that is honestly favored upon by many and has everyone going.

“hmm not sure” Taehyung says, “Maybe, I’m kind of over frat parties”.

“Yeah…, but this IS the last Ho-rah”. Taehyung shrugs at your response.

“How about you?” you turn to face Jungkook making sure to make eye contact, afraid he’ll look away and avoid you as he has done for the rest of the class period.

Jungkook looks you straight on furrowing his eyebrows, “Why should I go?” he asks almost coldly.

“Oh” okay he hates me, you thought to yourself. “Well, I mean everyone usually goes”, you respond to him with a much more quitter voice now that all your confidence has disappeared.

“It’s only for seniors. I’m a Sophomore”.

Sophomore.

WHAT!?

Your mouth fell agape. And you only half registered Taehyung laughter as he smacks your back,

“____, didn’t you know Jungkook is a baby”.

You knew he was baby. You didn’t realize he was a baby.

Jungkook rolls his eyes at Taehyung's comment.

“I didn’t...I-I’ You stuttered “ Aren’t you in the advanced class and have all these achievements and- and”.

“Yeah” Jungkook sourly smirks “I guess I’m just like all those overly passionate kids”.

Taehyung laughs as if not catching the tone in Jungkook’s voice or the nervous energy you are sure that can be detected from miles away.

“He’s the king of the sophomores! Why do you think they are always crowding him like he’s their hero”.

“Right…” you look down on the floor. You didn’t offend his mother, you offended him. You’ve insulted him.

“Okay, well I’ll see you guys in the next class, Bye” you turn fast around and start speed walking home. You only faintly catch Taehyung’s boisterous “Bye!”.

This all makes sense, the students crowing him like he’s a king, him being insulted by your unfunny comment, Taehyung always picking on him. But the thing is that Taehyung CAN pick on him because they are friends, he’s teasing him. You are not friends with him. You have no right to talk to him or joke with him like that. Your stress levels rise because you never want to hurt someone, much less intentionally. He probably thinks you’re some big bully and know it all. Imagine what he has told Taehyung by now. What if you get shunned by both of them? This is so embarrassing, and you feel awful. You shouldn’t have run away. You should have confronted Jungkook and apologized to him. You should have cleared the air. But at that moment you were so confused and surprised your head was everywhere. Forget dating Jungkook he probably wouldn’t even want to be friends with you anymore.

All of your woes were heard by your three roommates on your living room floor. Picking at your blue fuzzy carpet you retold them everything. They first got mad at you for not telling them about these two good looking guys in your class and then they got even more mad at you for making a

lame joke that insulted Jungkook and then running away.

“You need to talk to him ___”

“You said: ‘Overly passionate sophomores, little kids’. Who even talks like that?”.

Taehyung does you want to point out but instead remain quiet as they continue their criticism and advice.

“Yeah, talk to him! Don’t even think about how you insulted the poor guy!”

“or how you said an odd and unfunny joke”

You never thought about dating young guys. You were always into the older type. You ask your friends about what you should do. They give you the advice you already knew inside your heart. Talk to him, apologize, and go for it.

You remembered that Jungkook is sporty and artsy. The Art building was your first stop. You don’t know his schedule and frankly you don’t want to know it. It would make you feel like a total creep if you knew it and purposely went looking for him. You didn’t want to repeat the ugly feeling you felt after the eavesdropping incident at the elevators. Instead you conceded with a coincidence. This was less guilty.

You entered the Student museum and browsed the artwork. You were so excited to see one of Taehyung’s art pieces hanging in display that you quickly took a photo of it and texted it to him. You momentarily forgot about what had happened. You hesitated to look at your phone after feeling its vibrations indicating Taehyung had replied. You quickly found the nearest restroom which wasn’t easy given you’ve never been inside this building. You entered a stall and opened the text. You were greeted with a “You should have told me you were going to be there I just left Campus” accompanied with two crying emojis. You felt a sigh of relief, as if you can breathe again. Taehyung is not mad at you. You replied with compliments and several hearts that Taehyung gleefully returned.

Your mornings were spent waiting in between classes in the student lounge, in the Art building, and walking laps around the Sport’s building and Gymnasium. You even peeked at the pool only to be flashed with multiple water polo swimmers climbing out of the pool. You blushed running away after making eye contact with the swimming coach. During the night when you had boxing, everything seemed like the beginning of the semester. You would talk with Taehyung as you always would but Jungkook…he was different. He would acknowledge you and would occasionally join you and Taehyung, but he wouldn’t be alone with you anymore. If he ever was he would just stay with you in silence. It would be such a peaceful quietness if you weren’t so confused and nervous on what his opinion of you was. You wanted to apologize to him, but he became much more competitive and almost aggressive during demonstrations. You felt this new form of intimidation towards him. Was he trying to send you a message? No, of course not. It was probably just finals. Most people were on edge during this time.

In the last month of the semester you coincidently found out (thanks to the students in class) that Jungkook has a drawing class 30 minutes after your last class on Friday. With this new information you made plans to sprint over to the Art building to meet Jungkook.

You were just walking down the hall of your building when you spotted… Jungkook?

Interesting.

Is this fate?

This is the time.

He stops next to a class door and leans against the wall, seemingly waiting for someone. You notice then his huge army backpack. For boxing class, he brings a big black duffle bag. This backpack caught you for surprise. You stopped in your tracks staring at the backpack because you’ve seen it before. Plenty of times. In the library, the parking lot, the convenience store in front of the east campus. You’ve sometimes seen it by just passing by. The bag was so big and almost ridiculous that you’re sure most of the student body knows of it. To think that the bag belonged to Jungkook. You’ve never bothered to look at the owner and when you did, they were either far away, at an angle in which you can’t see them, or they had a bucket hat or hoodie over their face. All this time it was Jungkook. To think if you’ve looked or spoken to the person you would have known Jungkook way sooner. All this wasted time.

Is this the coincidence you were dreaming of? Does any of it mean anything? At this point you don’t care. You’re going to talk to Jungkook! Whatever opportunity that is presented to you, you are going to take. You’re almost close to Jungkook, who doesn’t notice you as he’s immersed on his phone, when the classroom door opens with pouring students. You're slightly worried he’s going to leave as the students start obscuring your clear view of him. However, what you don’t miss is the way a pretty girl stops in front of him. He looks up to her and smiles shyly. You can’t really see her face at this angle. You only notice the way Jungkook takes her books from her and follows behind her as she walks to the opposite direction from you.

You felt like you were in a movie. You know the type when the main character is standing in one place and all around her there’s blurs of people moving about. The screen is colored gray and there's sad music playing as you're left there in a daze.

O-kay.

So.

Jungkook has a …he has a… (you can’t’ say it).

Jungkook is-what?

Dating? Has a girl? Not available? Hmmm, maybe he’s not interested in you.

Walking back to your apartment so many questions and conclusions flow around in your head.

Did you ever stop and think he maybe just wasn’t into you? Like what if he just didn’t like you? And not in a bad way. He just doesn’t want to pursue a romantic relationship with you. And here you were thinking he was lucky you were even considering a younger guy like him. Please. Who do you think you are? You’ve acted so arrogant and bitter around him you’re surprised someone as sweet as Taehyung and Jungkook even talks to you.

Reaching your apartment and heading straight to the shower, because the shower is where you make all your final resolutions and get all your ideas, you’ve come to the resolution that you need to stop moping around in class. Second, you like Jungkook, like-like. Third, you are heart broken. And lastly, maybe it’s just not meant to be.

Sometimes things can be blessings in disguises.

You cried in the shower.

Your beautiful roommates were once again there to support you! They even surprised you that weekend by having a little party amongst you and your closest friends. Irene, Maria, Seokjin, Yoongi, and even Mr. Busy Chef Seokjin came along. It was fun and you got drunk. You are going to be okay. You are going to forget Jungkook. It’s the end of the semester anyway and you are leaving town after graduation. It’s for the best.

Right?

Wrong.

Wrong on all parts. You very much like Jungkook. It was confirmed the next time you went to boxing class when your heart didn’t stop thumping. And wrong because you aren’t going to let it go. You felt ridiculous and pretty whore-ish when you still found yourself smiling at him (and did you coyly laugh at his joke just now?) even after knowing he has a girlfriend/ partner/dating/something. (A voice in your head was whispering into your heart that nothing is confirmed yet).

“Jungkook”, you called out his name after the announcements in class. You ran to him and staked your claim on him before anyone else can take him away from you, “Jungkook, can you help me with the exercise from last class, please?”.

He agreed. You walked behind him as he was already heading to your claimed corner. You noticed the disappointed faces of some of your classmates. Taehyung also had a confused face on as he was heading your way for you two to possibly gossip at your corner.

Jungkook helped you with your placements and speed. It was honestly helpful even if you did laugh a bit too loudly or moved in a way you hoped was sensual. At one point you ran out of things to hold him back with, so you must admit defeat and let him go. You smiled at him wildly as he moved to the next student. It was the last month, it wasn’t going to lead anywhere anyways. Which is why you’re trying your best. You were going to see him, talk to him, simply be by him because you’re probably never going to see him again after this.

You connect eyes with Taehyung as he’s walking directly to you. You both held a staring contest till he reached your side. He squints at you. You made a face of a “what”.

He coughed, “So…uhh…you like Jungkook or...?”

You choked on your spit. Were you that obvious?

“Huh? No. What? N-why?”

Taehyung looks at you, “ No reason, just asking.”

He slowly inches away clearly trying to make you less nervous. So, you force your body to relax and just laugh at his antics.

The rest of the class period Taehyung kept sending you looks or raising his eyebrows. You were nervous but soon started to become defensive. You would occasionally mouth “What” at him. Until at the end of class, he finally walked up behind you and whispered “Jungkook”. You jumped back in surprise at his deep voice and most importantly at the name of the owner of your heart.

“Taehyung!” you yelled at him. He laughed, only to stop when Jungkook joins you two. You blushed again and started rubbing your arm afraid Taehyung would tease you again. You all went to gather your things and headed towards the exit to leave class. Taehyung taps your arm to grab your attention. He made the motion of sealing and locking his lips, making it even more noticeable! Your eyes averted to Jungkook only to feel a wave of relief at seeing him typing away at his phone. Thank God.

You give him a face. He chuckles at you.

“Bye__” he said walking away. You rolled your eyes.

“Bye __” Jungkook said with his sweet melodic voice. You smiled at him.

It was the night of the Senior Party and you were ready to forget all about the cute guy in your boxing class. No, not Taehyung but Jungkook. Since you found out about his girlfriend you’ve tried hard to rewire your brain to think of him only as a friend. It was easy because he was such a gentle person. He was kind and funny and so very ambitious. You’ve grown to admire him in many ways. You were happy at where your relationship was (even though you would still like to be involved with him…*cough*romantically….). You weren’t going to be no homewrecker even if it pains your heart to see him smile or see him ruffle his bouncy hair.

Who are you kidding? You are in love with him.

However tonight you are going to forget about him. Tonight was about finally graduating and having a fun night with your friends. You, your roommates and other friends all meet up at a local restaurant before the party. It was fun there stuffing your faces and emptying your glasses, you almost forgot about the party. So, before the buzz faded away you all slipped into an uber off to the streets of the Frats and Sororities that are hosting the party. You were sad that Taehyung wasn’t going to be there. You wanted to introduce him to your friends. A few months ago, he told you he wasn’t going to go and instead booked a trip up North to go camping with his friends Namjoon, Jimin, and Hoseok. Friends who were equally as handsome you thought to yourself last night as you scrolled through his Instagram feed and viewed his story. You should’ve accepted his invite when he jokingly asked you to tag along. Maybe then you would move on from…him.

With your short skirts, dresses and skinny jeans you all swayed into the blockparty-eque event. The music was loud and there were so many people dancing and running around.

“This is practically a carnival, we're only missing the rides” Sohee shouts over the music.

“Lets just go to the main house” you yell back at them.

You all walk the short distance to the largest house in the block, the main source of the party where the DJ, drinks and food is located. Inside the house was empty of furniture leaving every room as a makeshift dance platform.

“This looks complicated!” Sohee complains furrowing her eyebrows “Where do we even begin”

“Lets just look around!” Taeyeon excitedly states turning her head around. You were prepared to see her make a 360 turn. She was Minah's friend who you were surprised to see come to the party. She was a Junior and it wasn’t until the girls told you that night that plus ones were allowed regardless of their year so long as they are students at the University. If you would’ve known you would have “jokingly” invited Jungkook.

After scoping out the house, your group ended up stealing a bag of chips and red cups of lemon soda and vodka. You decided to go to the house next door which belonged to a sorority. (“Maybe they’ll have better drinks” Minah complained).

Entering the house was like a new world, the lights were off and the music was not blaring. It seemed more chill. You walked deeper into the house that had a great atmosphere. Upon entering the kitchen you see the island decked out in different snacks and even mini cupcakes. There is flavored beers and a variety of vodkas, tequilas, juices, and soda. You’ve all shared glances with smiles in your faces. This is your place. You've all grabbed your drinks and you managed to fit two mini cupcakes in your hands before you made your way into the main living room, which like the frat house, was bare of any furnishing. Leaning against the wall with Minah who grabbed cotton candy you sipped on your drinks as you watched the others invade the dance floor.

“You think this was supposed to be a private party?” She asks cutting off a chunk of her cotton candy to feed you.

You thought for a second letting the candy melt in your mouth.

“No,” you told her, meeting her eye. You both laughed. “It would be really stupid if it was, I mean it is the Senior Party thing”.

“Yeah but what if it is and they kick us out”.

You shrugged “Whatever were gone in two weeks anyways. Besides it's on them for hosting it on the same night”.

“I don’t know” Minah continued out with her cotton candy slipping her drink in between each bite. You weren’t sure if she was drunk and just saying something or was actually concerned. You peered your eyes on her face as if to see her better. She was zoned out.

Rolling your eyes you start to look around trying to see your dancing group of friends to join them. You were done with your cupcakes and were ready to drag yourself to them. You thought you saw the Blue sparkle of Tara’s dress. You focused more on the spot only to see these blue sparkles wearing Tara seeming to be dancing or should I say “hugging” someone.

"Oh my gosh, ! LOOK LOOK!” you said slapping Minahs arm.

“What?", she said, trying to catch what you're looking at.

“Tara! She's got herself-“ Your words died in your mouth. For as your eyes traced along this person dress they were meant with a head that did not belong to Tara. First, poor Tara who has the same dress as someone in this room. Second, this person is none other then that girl that Jungkook was with. Your mouth was stood agape for even if your heart broken at the reminder of that girl and the fact that Jungkook was not yours. Your heartbreak and slight jealousy was soon replaced with confusion and then anger. Isn’t this Jungkook's girlfriend? What is she doing grinding on someone who is not Jungkook? No, this guy was not him because you know this guy! He's the famous school pianist whose faces are plastered all over the music building and concert highlights. Min Yoongi. What is she doing? So because Yoongi is a school celeb she's just going to do Jungkook wrong like that. Pretty Jungkook, who smiled at her with a hopeful look in his eyes and carried her books around like some servant. Is your poor baby being played? How dare she? Does she not realize how blessed she is?

“Minah”, you hand her your drink, “wait here”.

You don’t bother for her response and only hear a “what?”

You don’t have time to fill her in about this snake because your adrenaline is pumping in. Maybe it's the alcohol or maybe it's your devotion towards Jungkook. All in the name of love. And if you're not going to be kicked out because it's a private party, you'll probably be kicked out for fighting. You didn’t take boxing for nothing.

Okay…

Maybe not. You're not sure what you're doing and even though you're angry and feel like you need to regain Jungkook's honor, you do have the same part of your brain working and yelling at you to turn back. What the hell do you think you are doing? And who the hell do you even think you are?

You could be on your way to making a complete fool of yourself. But no, you will do anything for Jungkook. Even if it turns out this person is Jungkook's girlfriend's twin and you reveal yourself to be a complete stalker and weirdo.

Your steps seem to move slowly and your skin burning hot from your anger now turns to anxiety. But it was like you couldn’t stop as you neared yourself to her. If you couldn’t confess to Jungkook this was an alternative outlet. By protecting his dignity.

Gosh, is it hot or are you just sweating?

And like a miracle sent from heaven you felt a cold hand wrap itself around your arm halting you in your steps. You tuned your head to see… JUNGKOOK?

“___” he says almost relieved.

You're confused and agaped. You're so caught off guard that you don’t manage to hide your opening mouth.

“Hey” he says softly, almost whispering. He quickly removes his hand around your arm.

His voice brings you back to reality. He always grounds you and neutralizes the nerves in your body. All by being near Jungkook's smiling face.

His smiling face that will soon turn bad. Your stress increases. Your eyes jump from his face to his girlfriend who is still dancing on Yoongi. Jungkook follows your eyes as he notices the stress evident on your face. What's wrong? Jungkook slightly steps in front of you as if to shield you from whatever your eyes keep returning to.

You reach out your hand trying to stop Jungkook from seeing the scene of his girlfriend dancing with another guy, but it's too late. Jungkook is staring ahead for a couple seconds.

Jungkook looks around trying to see what is catching your attention. He catches the sight of his cousin dancing on some guy. Putting a childish face on when she turns her head over to make out with him. Jungkook turns back to you with concern on his face at your still evident distress.

You watch as Jungkook quickly turns around. You see his concerned eyes and frowned lips. No, not to Jungkook. This won't happen to him, you wont allow it. Regaining your energy to confront this snake you move closer to him

“I’m sorry”

“So you want a drink?”

Is he trying to change the subject? Maybe they just broke up and you just reopened his wound.

You give him a smile of sympathy and pull him in for a hug. Yes, you were being forward but you are proud to admit that you didn’t hug him with any malicious or secretive motive. You just care for him so much that you want him to always be happy. You don’t know what happened between him and his girlfriend but you want him to know that he has you. That it is okay.

Jungkook stills in your embrace. You hug him tighter and are happy to finally feel him relax into your hug wrapping his arms around your lower body.

Jungkook is surprised and perhaps dreaming. When you jumped into his embrace he almost didn't know what he did to earn this. Your perfume was swaying in his brain until he saw the teasing expression on his cousin's face.

She winked at him, which caused his cheeks to heat up. So he quickly pulls away from you and coughs.

“So uhh, no drink?” he asks once more unsure of what to say.

You saw his blushing face, maybe you did too much but you couldn’t stop yourself from continuing when you heard a loud laugh at your side. You turn and sure enough see her laughing with the guy.

You step closer to Jungkook so you could whisper slowly to him, "Did you guys break up?”

Jungkook tilts his head in confusion but before he can continue you stop him.

“Its okay you don’t have to tell me, I’m sorry”

“__what are you sorry for?”

You nod your head towards her who continues to dance with the “other man”.

Jungkook squints his eyes at you after having looked in the direction that you head nodded towards. You see the confusion settle onto his face, waiting for you to continue whatever observation you are trying to make.

You decided to end his misery, 'He's obviously too embarrassed to admit it' you thought to yourself.

"I saw you guys together...", you say, trying your best to say the rest with your eyes. You watch as the realization hits his face. His lips formed a tiny 'oh', only to let out an "ah" followed by a short chuckle.

Following his amused response you felt embarrassed. Maybe you stepped out of line and he's going to thank you for rubbing salt into his wounds.

"Sorry" you blurt out trying to save what's left of the respect Jungkook has for you. " I should've stayed quiet..".

At this Jungkook laughs loudly only ending it with a...a coo? He leans closer to your ear so you can hear him clearly.

"Follow me"

You don't got to be told twice.

You follow him through the throngs of people, pass the kitchen, through the back door. You almost tumbled out the door but was captured by the cold air hitting your skin. You rub your arms weary of letting Jungkook see because you didn't want him to reconsider the whole idea and go back inside. You wanted to be alone with him out here. it was nice. You followed him to the bench that rocked back and forth. It was gray with a top cover. He sat on it waiting for you to join him as he tried his best to stabilize the bench by planting his feet to the ground. You gave him a small 'thanks' as you settled yourself next to him. You made sure to keep enough space between the two as to not make him uncomfortable.

Jungkook felt his heart beat in his chest a contrast to the cool night that was at a standstill compared to the house and loud music not only a few feet away. He was grateful for the noise and lights that came from the house and fencing of the backyard, as it gave his shaky breath a cover from being heard by you. He sneaked a glance at you and saw as you sat seated next to him. You followed him out here into the cold. He noticed as you rubbed your hands on your arms. At this point Jungkook knows what comes next. He should offer you his jacket, but he wasn't wearing anything. He opted for a button down, he had no reason for any other fabric. He thought he would spend most of the night in a packed house or street with so much body heat. He felt like a kid scared to look at their crush. He didn't know what to do from this point on. Having a surge of confidence at the probability that you cared for him. If you being concerned about his alleged heartbreak was anything to go by. Jungkook wants to hold onto the care you had for him no matter how small it was. He knew you were a senior who was set to go out of town. His dreams of being with you seemed like a lost hope by now. At this point he just wanted to stay by your side, just to talk, even if just for a day.

One thing Jungkook became sure of as you both stared silently at the moon was that this right here was more than he could have ever wished for.

You were the one to break the silence.

You figured you should clear the air after your assumptions.

"So how are you holding out?"

Jungkook was about to give you a generic answer until he remembered what happened inside.

"I feel perfect" he answered honestly

You give him a confused look.

Man, you thought for sure Jungkook would be heartbroken, now you're thinking of the possibility that he left her.

Jungkook suppressed his giggles and decided to come clean to you. To tell you the truth. That's all he wants for the both of you.

"You know you can come to the senior bash if you're invited by a senior"

You nod not sure where this is going.

"I asked my cousin to let me go with her" Your eyes widened

Cousin?

"I was going to go with Taehyung but he had other plans. My cousin said yes...with the condition that I become her "assistant", Jungkook makes air quotations at the word. You smiled at the playful annoyance. "So I helped her with her courses, and followed her around everywhere. Honestly". He leans in closer pointing at the colorful lights that adorned the roof of the house. "You see those lights? I hung them up all yesterday and when you go inside that dessert table was recently bought from Ikea, I had to set it up". He slumps his shoulders.

"So was it worth it?" you ask not helping the giggles that escape your mouth at his behavior.

Jungkook turns to face you. The first time you both make eye contact since reaching the bench.

"Yeah" he says softly, "I'll say it was worth it".

You avert your eyes and turn your face. A struggle but your fear of letting him see the absolute shyness you knew ozed out won over. You needed to protect yourself and most importantly him. You didn't want to scare him or offend him anymore then you already have.

Not wanting to lose the momentum of the conversation, Jungkook spurts out the first thing in his mind.

"So where are you going after you graduate?"

For some reason you didn't want to answer. It would make it way more real. The fact that you wouldn't see him anymore and that hurt. At that moment with the distant music that pouned throughout the earth, with the laughter you hear from inside the house, the light of the moon and lights from the house, the coldness that you feel around your arms and neck become fuel for you. If this was going to be your last moment with him then you should make the best out of it. Maybe even let yourself become vulnerable in every sense of the word. If just for one day, you wanted to be completely honest and open with Jungkook.

"I got an internship two hours away" you say looking at the ground, "I'll be kind of far, but maybe not so much" you don't know what you're saying, mostly just trying to convince yourself. You looked at him and are willing to say he looked almost sad. You don't know why he looks down now. You just know it made you feel worse. You want your time with him to be happy and fun. Even if it hurts later. You don't know why hes sad and you may make yourslef look completely stupid but in this moment you wieghed your options. If he answers positively you can leave with hope. If it's negative...well...at least you won't have to see him again. That thought makes you frown and scares you. It scares you so much that you couldn't even stop yourself from asking the next question if you tired.

"Do you want to wait for me?"

You both look surprised at your question.

Jungkook remains silent, so you repeat the question already feeling the adrenaline rush from your confession.

"Jungkook, do you want to wait for me?" You ask him again with hopeful eyes.

"Ar-are you pr-proposing?" He was so in shock he didn't have time to register his childhood stutter to make an appearance.

Normally you would have been frozen out of embarrassment and shock. Truthfully, you were bewildered at your actions. But it must be the power of the moon that shines above you both. Or maybe it's the alarm in your heart telling you this may be your only chance. You take a breath and give jungkook a soft smile. One that said 'yes I like you and it's okay if you don't'. You watch as he takes a moment to gather himself.

Hmm.. maybe you should have been more clear on your love confession. You were about to open your mouth to explain when he turned his body to face you. He reaches out for your hand to hold it in between his two large ones. You watch as your hands disappear inside of his.

Okay, maybe you were freaking out a little bit.

The warmth from his hands begins to travel from your arm to all of your body. Your heart beating fast against your chest as you decided to finally look him in the eye.

"Why wait?" Jungkook says.

FIN

#jk #jungkook #bts #taehyung #boxing #college au #bts fic #jk fic #jungkook fic

[faithtales]

My Struggle with Depression (& Believing He's still on time)

I first made a thread of this on Twitter last month, and decided to make it into a blog post, especially cause I clock 27 tomorrow, and the anxiety of 'time is running out, what have I even achieved?' came back. I was going through some old videos and stumbled upon a song a sung last year, titled "Four Days Late" which was a comfort to me. It reminded me God is not blind to our suffering, and He will always come through ON TIME. I'll keep it short.

OK, here goes:

Last year, I hit a low. It all started with a "we regret to inform you" email that crushed me. You know those opportunities you apply for and in your heart, you convince yourself you got it... I didn't get any of them.

So I didn't take it very well. I spent my days in bed. Getting up was such a struggle. When I did get up, I would end up breaking down wherever I was. In church, at the market... I cried a lot! I was a mess.

It seemed like everyone's life was going smoothly, and I was stuck. Everyone looked happy, going on trips, having great jobs. Boo'd up lol. I felt like I had nothing going for me.

It was such a dark time. I was jobless, broke, and felt there was nothing to look forward to in my life. The future seemed so bleak. I lost all hope.

It felt like no one even saw how low I was sinking. Then 2 of my closest friends noticed that something was off with me. The rest didn't pick it up. I won't lie, it hurt. Maybe I hid it well, or they just didn't notice. I don't know.

It got so bad that I started to contemplate suicide. It wouldn't be the first time I would attempt suicide (story for another day). It was such a terrible time. I managed to open up to one friend and I think I am still alive because of them.

They reminded me of what I've accomplished and told me that there is so much to look forward to. They stayed up with me on the phone till I fell asleep just so I wouldn't spend time alone. Every. Single. Day.

Lucky enough, my mum also picked it up. She understood me & encouraged me to start a diet (something I had wanted for a while) because I lost weight. So I started a fattening diet. It was the only thing that kept me going. I have gained 10+ kgs since, a journey I'll blog about soon.

Then vs Now

Slowly, I dug myself out of that pit. When I did tell some friends what I had gone through, they were shocked, asked me why I didn't tell them what I was going through etc

When I did experience a slump again, I opened up to one of my friends and honestly, I regretted it. Few minutes into me telling them what I was going through, THEY FELL ASLEEP!

Do y'all know how hurt I was. My problems are boring enough to make someone fall asleep. Lol I learnt my lesson from there. I open up to the people that truly care

Fast forward to now, I'm still jobless, but I started my own business. I got over my heartbreak but I haven't resumed applying for opportunities yet. But I am in a better place and I'm glad that storm is over.

The story is long, and I've really cut it short, but in summary: if you are feeling depressed, please seek professional help. Talk to someone THAT CARES and always remember that the storm will end and you will feel the sun shine again.

You are strong and you will get through this. There are so many places you still have to go, awesome people you have to meet, and goals you have to accomplish.

I have been there and I want to tell you that it will be over. Hold on. If you're a Christian like me, keep praying. God is not deaf. He hears and you may not feel it, but He's right there with you.

Lastly, it is not easy for someone to open up, especially about depression. Please check on your friends and be SINCERE. If they do come to you, sometimes, just your listening ear and a prayer is enough. Trust me. It goes a long way.

You are precious.

You are loved.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Love,

Fai

Follow me on Instagram and Twitter. Oh and my Facebook music page.

#inspiration #malawi #my post

[sailolive93-blog]

The best Guide to Reddit Marketing around 2019

"Yep, i do all my modelling in C4D as I just know the tools so well there. I do minimal retopology in Zbrush on organic shapes but any hard surfaces I make in C4D. I'd recommend the "Introduction to Subdivision modelling in C4D" by Shane Benson on Vimeo (he goes by Sheppard O'Neill on YouTube if you prefer that) and it was his tuts that got me into box and subdiv modelling.

I'm also releasing a modelling workshop in C4D and models from the kitchen scene that these belong to will be in there to learn. Just not these two as they belong to marketing for the workshop. very well "Brand new Reddit account with two extensive comments defending Boa Vista Orchards huh...? We joked earlier about spotting the Boa Vista account in here but it looks like we actually have lol! > I just talked to the dude who does the marketing for Apple Hill and he sent me this So you just randomly talked to the guy and he emailed over his entire statement...? " "I too wonder why they didn’t just create a new line and call it the mach-e instead of mustang, I believe it has something to do with the marketing department since they knew it’ll stir a lot of discussion" "Precedent suggests it depends on the marketing around the product being sold and the implied purpose. " "Wow, ha. The fact that you think that it’s ok for the government to strip away my personal health insurance so that I HAVE to be on the same shitty plan on everybody else is crazy. If healthcare is “free” and universal, the quality of healthcare is bound to decrease. I can choose to pay for whatever the fuck I want and whatever healthcare I want. I give to charity and I have plans on giving a lot more to charity as I get further in my career and start making more money. Believe it or not, you aren’t the only one that cares about people just because you want “free” healthcare for everybody. And there is also no such thing as free healthcare. It has to be paid somehow and middle class taxes will go up no matter how complicated you try to make the source of payment sound. And regarding free college, that will also raise middle class taxes. You keep bringing up this. 02% of financial transactions bullshit as if that’s going to cover all costs. Have you done studies on this yourself? Do you even know that? You act like all these things can be magically paid for without anybody in the middle class being negatively affected. I have a bachelor’s degree and I didn’t feel like college was very challenging. It was more like a series of annoying classes I didn’t need when all of college could have been boiled down into one year of the core classes of my major of marketing. College is a fuckin scam and it’s only truly necessary for a very limited amount of majors. You’re just another minion that kisses the feet of big-government Democrats that try to make us feel like horrible people for not allowing them to sucks insane amounts of money out of the economy and spend it how they would like to. inch "That's including the localization teams for every language though, as well as PR and marketing. >! Some of them might even be legacy accreditation for the Gen 6 models they're *still* using.! < " "Time is a cost and you should track where that cost is going. That said, if you are working on general administrative/nonbillable stuff within your own department, it's pretty easy to have that time automatically go to the right cost bucket, so generic entries for that sort of thing are fine imo. The stuff that really has to be tracked is anything for clients or for departments that are outside your default (e. g. engineer writes a blog post, that's marketing time etc). micron "I believe there are some lessons on Google Academy for Adss (now called Skillshop) but hands-on experience is tricky. Two ways are possible, 1) is for you to have your own website and use Google Ad Sense, but this is more from the advertiser side rather than publisher or technical side 2) ask a digital or marketing agency that is near you if you can shadow/assist/internship/work experience for a week or so. This may be difficult depending on where you live and agency people are always very busy, so if you do ask tell them how you could help THEM not the other way around. To be honest, start with Analytics and Paid Search as they are arguable more accessible and have more out there for you to learn" "We are in the same boat, but different industry. Here's my approach, starting this week: I'm joining business groups that my target clients are a part of, for example, manufacturer groups. Then I'm going to target that organization with our services. I'm then going to offer to speak about the service I offer and how it helps businesses. Not a marketing spiel, an educational talk. Good luck" "One might consider a lawsuit if a car or alcohol company advocated or implied the action of drinking and driving in their marketing" "This post has been removed for breaking Rule 1. No Spammy Titles. Do not mention anything about selling anything in the title. Absolutely ZERO marketing in the title. Do not even ask for people to contact you for more. Be enticing. Post quality pics with quality titles. Read the rules for info on how to market yourself here. If your posts keep getting removed then you will be banned. READ THE RULES! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Remember to[contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/? to=/r/feetpics) if you have any questions or concerns. *" "I came of grew up and came of age in Chicago during Jordan's time with the Bulls and the shortest answer is that it's almost incomparable because the level of fame basketball players before Michael Jordan was laughably lower than now. Even today MJ has a logo that might be more identifiable than the company that created it. I would argue no athlete in any sport has surpassed MJ's level of fame. MJ pioneered so many avenues of endorsements, its like comparing planes in the era of propeller planes with jet planes. Jordan like most greats, stood on the shoulders of giants, specifically Larry Bird and Magic Johnson. Those two spent the better part of the late 70's and early to late 80's dominating the sport of basketball. Also add in Isiah Thomas of the Pistons and arguably "Dr. J" Julius Erving of the 76ers and those four were the superstars of the four teams that won EVERY NBA championship of the decade. Before Michael Jordan won his FIRST NBA Championship in 1991, he was arguably bigger than all of them. Before MJ, being a big name athlete meant getting your name on a breakfast cereal box called Wheaties, and doing the commercial saying the plug line "Gotta eat your Wheaties! " That's not a joke. Check 'em out on youtube, they're cringe worthy. MJ's meteoric rise in my opinion was helped by a few special advertising campaigns. I think first would have been his Nike commercials with Spike Lee, another pioneer. He just made "Do the right thing" at a time when black people making movies with black people in the movies wasn't really a thing. Spike Lee also happens to like playing characters in his own movies and Mars Blackmon was a character in that movie that Spike Lee chose to portray in a series of commericals with Michael Jordan. Again, pardon me for repeating, but I have to say it again for context. You have a supremely talented and charismatic young athlete being marketed by a young shoe company (Converse Chuck Taylors were still THE basketball shoe) hiring a visionary and ground breaking director to do something that had not been done before. And they crushed it. Again, at this time Michael Jordan wasn't winning NBA championships. He was having savant level performances, but get bounced out of the first round by the Celtics, or getting manhandled in the playoffs by the Pistons. By the time he did win it all in 91, MJ was doing things that no one had done in fields well outside basketball. Michael Jordan in Flight is one of the first videogames to have 3D. He had already supplanted Dr J in the one on one basketball video game with Larry Bird. Gatorade put out a marketing campaign with the song "Be Like Mike" and that song was the top song for the summer of 92 in Chicago on most radio stations regardless of genre. You're already familiar with Space Jam, but before Space Jam, the Looney Toons were relegated to afternoon after school syndicated (rerun) television stations. Michael Jordan made Bugs Bunny cool again to a whole new generation that knows of them only through MJ. I hope that helps. inches "Yeah I don't want to turn it around and criticize Musk over this or anything, but Tesla is great at PR and marketing while convincing people they don't actually try to be. inches "No, you dont need more parties, you need to ban all parties and establish government funded elections where everyone with a certain amount of support by the people can run using government money and marketing channels. Equal funding, equal marketing, equal candidacy, by the people, for the people. Sounds too good to be true? Well fuck you, because parties are corrupt barbaric cavemen shit. " " Funny Cartoon Images for website content - Family Funny Images and illustrations, Ultimate single panel funny cartoons used for websites, social media and emails https://www.freecartoonsdaily.com https://www.cartoons.cafe   www.cartoons.cafe www.acmeblanks.com sign up now! Funny Cartoons, Funny family cartoon images, Custom Cartoons, Niche Cartoons, Humorous Illustration Services, Business Cartoons, Medical Cartoons, Custom Comic Strips, Book Illustration Services, Political Cartoons, funny hospital cartoons, cartoons for marketing, corporate cartoons, work cartoons, business cartoons, Computer Cartoons, farmer cartoons, farm cartoons, tractor cartoons, Pig cartoons, pig farmer cartoons, cor farmer cartoons, wheat farmer cartoons, soybean farmer cartoons.... inch "That's including people associated with the marketing and promotion of Sword and Shield, which means people at Nintendo and the Pokemon Company rather than actual programmers at Game Freak working on the game itself. The same article you're looking at gives 200 at Game Freak - which is likely wrong since Game Freak had 143 employees, and Game Freak openly stated most were working on Town. You could include the modelers from Creatures Inc, but given that the models are the same as those developed for X and Y by Creatures Inc years ago, they are likely still being credited for "work" on this game that was actually done quite some time ago. " "Imagine what a lucky break JonTron was for FlexSeal. Their products are actually pretty decent, but their marketing was almost typical infomercial stuff that no-one over fifty would've seen. Next, out of nowhere, some YouTuber makes them famous amongst younger customers. People make "that's a lotta damage, " and "I sawed this boat in half, " memes. Everyone knows who they are. Chances are, when you need some stuff like this you'll at the very least know about their existence and you might buy their stuff because at least you know they're legit. Some people will buy it when they need something like that, literally for the meme. All they have to do is keep the ball rolling with tweets like these (because, of course, people actually follow them on Twitter now). " "That's my point. The pub you linked to is disney land. I'm looking for somewhere that recreates the  a more authentic historical experience. I think these places have got their marketing wrong which is why they are closing. They should be trying to recreate an experience closer to that in the Pathe news reel. If you just sold fresh baked bread, potted Hare, a variety of local ales you could heat with a poker while smoking a hilarious pipe you could capture a huge slice of the real ale / hipster / foodie market. " "No game in the genre had been competition for the Diablo franchise since it's inception. D3 no matter how you look at it was a huge commercial success being in the top 10 video games sold of all time at one point. Diablo now has become what WoW was before, tons of games saying they are a WoW killer and none of them doing it. So now we looming at Diablo killers but they all end up falling off somewhere because they don't get the same $$$ support / marketing. inch "8M opening weekend bad = bad marketing. Bad quality movie would be revealed in the multiplier (word of mouth and no rewatches). In this case I don’t think there was anything compelling from the movie they could focus the marketing around which led to the 8M OW. " "I’m in the same boat. I have to get 14 credits by may2020. In the last 2 weeks I did principle of marketing 3 credits score 66 and principal of management 3 credits score 62. This week I’ll take precalculas which is 5 credits and calculus which is 4 credits. I did not pay the $89 for the test because I did modernstates which pays the testing fee. It also reimburses me for the $20 testing fee" "Marketing. McAf€€ gets money from users, Micro$oft gets money from McAfee. They beget the green, motherfuckers that they are. Sometimes  http://tipofmytongue.topreddit.info  who install 3^^rd party stuff tho, it's not only Microsoft. Anyway, it's a motherfuckery of bloatware if not malware. "McAfee antivirus is one of the worst products on the planet" -John McAfee" "You're arguing entirely from marketing hype instead of actual quality, which is entirely stupid and comes down entirely to Sont having far greater of a userbase and them having less games to pump more money behind. Besides, let's not pretend Sony has an actual library of games here. Both Xbox and Sony have completely shit the bed this console generation in terms of exclusive libraries. Sony has had like, 8 good games this entire generation as exclusives. You have Death Stranding, Uncharted 4, Horizon, Until Dawn, Bloodborne, God of War, MLB The Show... That's about it? I guess you also have Detroit and Last Guardian depending on who you ask, but I defo don't wanna throw Days Gone on that list. But in any case, you could lump all of those games into loke 3-4 genres. Am I missing anything? But yeah, stop saying dumb shit like "Well its not a household name so its irrelevant" because you're entirely missing the point and reducing the entire industry to what can or can't be marketed. As well, its telling that Sony has stated their goal next-gen is to have less games release but have them be bigger, where Microsoft is going the opposite direction. Keep the the big titles, bur also have a little something for everyone. Diversity is important. Your Battletoads reboot might not sell as well, but its important to folks who like it. Games shouldn't be live or die based on how well they fit in established and marketable trends. Its absurdly reductive" "I actually never had injected one, whats the main difference? And is it really a big improvement or rather a marketing bait" "It’s all part of his NYC persona. Marketing. inches

#tag #statics

[got-to-love-a-badboy]

Runaway

Dacre/female character fanfic

Chapter one

Flash back

Sarah was pacing the floor of the airport,

"I can't do this Chlo!" The past week final hitting her, "I auditioned for a role I thought I never had a shot at, and now I'm leaving all this....." waving her hands in front of her "..shit show behind. What am I doing!" Her best friend Chloe grabbed her face in her hands "Hey! yes you can! You have to now it's not just you, plus the worst part is over now your free! And don't you ever think you are alone! I'm here with you all the way! And look at Katie! She needs you" Chloe said looking down at the baby.

I'm a wreck Chloe, he ruined me, I used to laugh all the time, you remember me in high school, I was popular, Happy and I had goals, look at me now, a broken mother running off to the other side of the country away from him in hopes of finding myself again" she began sobbing again, "yes, while all that is true this is a fresh start for you and Katie! You go on that set tomorrow and be the old Sarah, you have no baggage now you can be you again, and who knows Atlanta may be the home of a hottie that restores your faith in men!".

Sarah rolled her eyes at her friends comment "thank you so much! I 100% could not have done this without you! ... and as for the hottie, He can wait I'm done with men thank you!".

Sarah picked up her 1 year old daughter in her car seat, Chloe grabbed the bags and they headed for the plane without looking back.

Over the next year the girls settle in the apartment across the hall from the rest of the cast, while Sarah is filming Chloe looks after Katie for her, the whole cast love Katie, she has so many aunt and uncles!.

Sarah feels so happy and blessed to have these people in her and Katie's life, she has come to the realisation that Katie has more of a social life than she has! She is always going on days out with her Aunts and uncles!.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

Stranger things group chat

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

Sarebear - Sarah

Lowlow-Chloe

Hair - Joe

Charles - Charlie

Gatman - Gaten

Natsprat - Natalie

NoNo - Noah

Wolfie - Finn

Milz - Millie

McCaleb - Caleb

—— season 2 Bitches! ——

Hair- so I decided to make a group seen as you guys weren't going to 😒

Gatman- wow Joe! Give us chance bro!

Milz- yeah JOE!

Sarebear - aww can't you get enough

Of us Joe!

Hair- Hmm I like some of you... not all!, anyway have you all seen the email about new cast members?!

Natsprat- oh yes I have! How exciting we meet them on Saturday! Their number are on the email, il add them!

Hair- yeah take the glory for my group Nat!

Lowlow- Jeez I have missed your dramatic ass Joe!

Hair- Chloe! You missed my ass, how cute 😍

Lowlow- oh Jesus 🙈I walked in to that one huh!?

Sarebear- ha kinda did chlo!

Wolfie- Keery you have no shame man!

NoNo- ^^^

Natsprat added 2 to the group chat

Number 1- Hiii it's Sadie

Number 2- hey guys Dacre here.

Natsprat- hey guys everyone say hi and introduce yourselves!

Sarebear- Hi Guys can't wait

to meet you on Saturday!

Welcome to the group chat!

it's Sarah by the way

Hair- sup guys. Joe Keery here!

Lowlow- hey guys I'm not cast but you will see me everyday, aren't you lucky! I'm chloe!

Gatman- welcome! I'm Gaten !

Wolfie- nice to meet you

I'm Finn

NoNo- hey guys I'm Noah it's nice to meet you!

Milz- hellooo, so exciting! I'm Millie 😊

McCaleb- yo I'm Caleb, exciting to meet u!

Charles- welcome! It's Charlie!

Sarebear changed names to DownUnder and Sadiebaby.

Sarebear- my welcome gift 🎁😘

Sadiebaby- thanks cutie 😘

DownUnder- ha! Thanks doll!

Natsprat- yeah she named us all ...can you tell 😒

So what time you guys in to Atlanta?

DownUnder- I actually land first thing Saturday 5am 😒

SadieBaby- I'm in at lunch time I'm so excited!

Wolfie- We're all excited too.

NoNo- most of us are in late afternoon but Sarah is already in Atlanta so she will meet you when you get in I'm sure.

Sarebear- Yeah just give me a text when you're here!

SadieBaby- where do we all stay?

Natsprat- well we have a huge apartment, the girls have one floor and the guys have the another, then Sarah and Chloe are across the hall in a smaller apartment.

DownUnder- cool, anyway guys I'm going to bed it's mega late here! see you in 2 days!

Charles- shit forgot he's in a totally different time zone!

Natsprat- night guys!

Wolfie- Night!

Hope you all like the first Chapters please let me know if I should post more, I’m currently up to chapter 24 on whattpad

This was actually 2 but posted them as one.

Thank you 🥰

#dacre montgomery #fanfic #stranger things #billy hargrove

[onecrazysquirrel]

Good morning beloved and God bless you on this beautiful morning.

Well it is trying to turn into one of those days on me but I won't let it. Woke up with a sore back (nothing new) finally came to enough to make it to the restroom somewhere between 9:30 and 9:45 AM, finally slept sort of; was in and out all night seemed like I kept waking up every fifteen minutes, at least I got some sleep thank God. Started my morning routine I always start by studying a bible verse and praying. Enjoyed studying and the initial prayer time, created an image for The Dressing Vine Ministries with the verse and shared it to the various platforms we are associated with. Then I went to work on an update for a campaign that I'm overseeing to aid a single mother and her child who are currently homeless, there should've been money deposited in an account for them this morning; I go to check the withdraws section of the campaign and it has that button saying to set them up, I did this early last week so it should already be set up. I ran through the set up process again and checked again and there was the setup button again, first email to the help center for technical support and they responded by restarting the campaign and emailing back saying the campaign was now ready; I checked it again and it still said setup so I ran through the process again thinking maybe they just needed to initiate the campaign, no good still the same outcome. I let it ride and set up for the morning update, created the artwork for the morning and gathered some alternate donation method information; was typing up the update and momma messaged me so I had to tell her that there were issues and the money hadn't come through. Needless to say she was somewhat upset a she apparently had something to pay off around 12:30 and was really counting on the funds, this put a serious damper on my wake ritual, I sent her some encouraging words and stopped everything to take a few minutes to pray for her; I finished the update supplying Cash App and Venmo information for anyone who wanted to contribute for the time being, I posted it and went back to troubleshooting the issue. Well now I have sent the second email trying to explain the situation more in depth and am waiting for their response, I'll follow up when I'm finished sharing here. So far that's been my morning, rather frustrating to be honest and somewhat disheartening but not so terrible as to darken the whole day; I refuse to let one little issue like this bring me down.

It's currently 12:01 PM here in Dayton Ohio and 39° with a forecasted high of 49° with a real feel of 43° so bundle up it's that deceptive type of cold that doesn't really feel that cold until it's made you sick. The sun is out and shining I see barely any clouds and from what I can tell it's calm with little to no winds. So not a bad day outside but still not fun of you're stuck in it.

Still need help here prayers, love and support would like to get some more work done the car and pray some bills and loans; running through gas like it's soaking into the ground it seems, and I keep getting these candy bar and pop cravings that start up and just won't go away. I know candy bar and pop probably shouldn't be brought up, not really worth mentioning; but when the cravings are driving you crazy and you gave no means to take care of them, well just thought I'd throw them in here. It's starting to get late already and I still need to finish my bible study and prayers for the morning, not to mention troubleshoot this issue and get cleaned up and ready to go to work this afternoon. So I am going to wish you all a very blessed day in the Lord.

Thank you for spending a few minutes with me today and thanks for all of the prayers, love and support that you offer. May God bless and keep each and everyone of you and yours...

#photo edit #photoart #prose #artists on tumblr #original post #portrait #poem #poetry #visual verse #photography

[thedressingvineministries]

Good morning beloved and God bless you on this beautiful morning.

Well it is trying to turn into one of those days on me but I won't let it. Woke up with a sore back (nothing new) finally came to enough to make it to the restroom somewhere between 9:30 and 9:45 AM, finally slept sort of; was in and out all night seemed like I kept waking up every fifteen minutes, at least I got some sleep thank God. Started my morning routine I always start by studying a bible verse and praying. Enjoyed studying and the initial prayer time, created an image for The Dressing Vine Ministries with the verse and shared it to the various platforms we are associated with. Then I went to work on an update for a campaign that I'm overseeing to aid a single mother and her child who are currently homeless, there should've been money deposited in an account for them this morning; I go to check the withdraws section of the campaign and it has that button saying to set them up, I did this early last week so it should already be set up. I ran through the set up process again and checked again and there was the setup button again, first email to the help center for technical support and they responded by restarting the campaign and emailing back saying the campaign was now ready; I checked it again and it still said setup so I ran through the process again thinking maybe they just needed to initiate the campaign, no good still the same outcome. I let it ride and set up for the morning update, created the artwork for the morning and gathered some alternate donation method information; was typing up the update and momma messaged me so I had to tell her that there were issues and the money hadn't come through. Needless to say she was somewhat upset a she apparently had something to pay off around 12:30 and was really counting on the funds, this put a serious damper on my wake ritual, I sent her some encouraging words and stopped everything to take a few minutes to pray for her; I finished the update supplying Cash App and Venmo information for anyone who wanted to contribute for the time being, I posted it and went back to troubleshooting the issue. Well now I have sent the second email trying to explain the situation more in depth and am waiting for their response, I'll follow up when I'm finished sharing here. So far that's been my morning, rather frustrating to be honest and somewhat disheartening but not so terrible as to darken the whole day; I refuse to let one little issue like this bring me down.

It's currently 12:01 PM here in Dayton Ohio and 39° with a forecasted high of 49° with a real feel of 43° so bundle up it's that deceptive type of cold that doesn't really feel that cold until it's made you sick. The sun is out and shining I see barely any clouds and from what I can tell it's calm with little to no winds. So not a bad day outside but still not fun of you're stuck in it.

Still need help here prayers, love and support would like to get some more work done the car and pray some bills and loans; running through gas like it's soaking into the ground it seems, and I keep getting these candy bar and pop cravings that start up and just won't go away. I know candy bar and pop probably shouldn't be brought up, not really worth mentioning; but when the cravings are driving you crazy and you gave no means to take care of them, well just thought I'd throw them in here. It's starting to get late already and I still need to finish my bible study and prayers for the morning, not to mention troubleshoot this issue and get cleaned up and ready to go to work this afternoon. So I am going to wish you all a very blessed day in the Lord.

Thank you for spending a few minutes with me today and thanks for all of the prayers, love and support that you offer. May God bless and keep each and everyone of you and yours...

#holiness #charity #finance #money #godliness #jesus #love #youtube #family #donate

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: Can you come over? I don't care if it has to be late Rio: What's wrong? Are you okay? Buster: No. And I don't wanna be alone here, with this shit, that'll make it worse Rio: Coming as soon as I can Rio: What has she said? Done? Buster: She's threatening to tell everyone about us and stop me seeing Jay if I don't dump you and get back with her Buster: It's fucking stupid and mostly not happening but Christ, I'm so tired Buster: And sick of her Rio: You know she can't stop you Rio: but if you have to then do Rio: Leave me, I mean, not the bit where you bow to her every whim and marry her at once Rio: if it makes it easier to keep seeing Jay, then I get it Rio: I don't know what I'll do but Buster: Fuck off. I won't. I love you Buster: I love Jay too, obviously, but like you said, she can't stop me seeing her Buster: I'll go to court, I don't care Rio: You know I love you too Rio: but I don't want to make your life any more difficult than it is already with her in it Buster: You're the only thing keeping me sane and you know it Buster: I can't lose you Rio: Okay Rio: You're sure? Rio: If you are, then I'll stand by you and support you 1000% Rio: Of course, I will Buster: 'Course I am. I know it felt a bit, I don't know how to even describe it, going from where we were to like bracelets and 'I love you's ' or whatever but it's been a long time coming, yeah? Buster: And I swear I mean it. I'm so sure Rio: Yeah Rio: Me too Rio: I just wish the rest wasn't such a fucking mess Rio: How are we going to face all the people we have to face Buster: I have no fucking clue, honestly, but I know I'll support you in whatever you wanna do or say Buster: We'll handle it together. Somehow Rio: I'm trying to think faster than she can post Rio: We have to get it out there before she does, right? Rio: At least it'll be the truth, I can own that better than whatever story she's concocting rn Buster: Yeah Buster: And it'll be better coming from us, I reckon, still a shock but Buster: They'll see where we're coming from instead of her POV Buster: Though maybe it's better for everyone to think we're just fucking and we can stop? I don't know Buster: That's what she believes Rio: But when we don't Rio: They're just going to think...Fuck knows Rio: I don't think it'll be good but Rio: I just don't know, I can't predict what anyone is going to think or say Rio: Do Buster: We could always let her post it and leave until some of the backlash dies down. Not what a mature dad would do like Buster: But Buster: She doesn't think I am anyway so whatever, yeah? Rio: Where are we going to go? Rio: We can't stay away forever Buster: This is such a headfuck Buster: There's no time Buster: Thriving under pressure is one thing, but she's proper ambushed us Rio: I know, I feel sick Rio: Stalking her feeds like its love Buster: I can't even bring myself to have anything open on my phone other than this convo Buster: How are we even gonna get everyone together to tell them? There's so many of the fuckers Rio: I don't know, mass group chat seems a little blasé Rio: Maybe, we tell the most important ones, and fast Rio: and then let them tell who they need to etc Rio: Let word of mouth do the rest Buster: Fucking hell, Nance is in NYC, I can't be like excuse the time difference but I've gotta just ruin your life again potentially really quick Rio: Oh, fuck Rio: I wish I didn't love you like I do Rio: would be so much simpler, wouldn't it Buster: I know, but don't say that again, okay? Buster: I told Chlo I don't regret you and I meant it Buster: Even if I have to let mum and dad tell Nance and let her think that's how little I care about her Rio: I'm sorry, I don't want it in any other way, and I only want it that way for your benefit Rio: I don't want to hurt you, ever Rio: Run to NYC? Buster: Good Buster: I would if I thought she'd have me. But I've got no right to ask her for that Rio: What if I ask? Rio: Obviously we'd need a place to stay when the shit hits the fan but at least you can do it in person Buster: Yeah Buster: She deserves that much after me being such a shit brother, as Chlo was quick to remind me Rio: You've had your moments but she still loves you, Buster Buster: Maybe she shouldn't Buster: Maybe I should just stay away from her Rio: Why? Buster: She's finally landed on her feet with uni like, she doesn't need me ruining everything for her again Buster: She's close to you and I've taken the piss so much already, she might not understand why I'm doing this Rio: I know but Chlo isn't going to help her understand, is she? Rio: If we're doing this Rio: if its worth it, we have to go in Rio: we're going to hurt people, and its gonna be fucking horrible Rio: but, it'll hurt me to have to leave you, and that's the only alternative we have left Buster: You're right. Making a habit of being, yeah? Buster: Looks like I'm getting on another flight then Buster: If I pass uni myself at this point nobody can say shit about my ego Rio: You know you can, you will Rio: Obviously you have to tell her alone Rio: but do you want me to come? Rio: I have the funds Buster: I want nothing more but what about your family? Besides Billie they are all here Buster: If you want to tell your parents first I can't blame you Rio: Maybe I'm being a coward, but I'm not convinced Chlo will actually do anything, she would've just done it, surely? I think if you can keep her talking, even if its arguing, it gives us time...like its all she has over you Rio: She'd be a moron (more than she is) to just let go of it that easy Buster: I reckon you're onto something, babe Buster: Or you just really want a holiday like Rio: How did you guess? Rio: Gonna have time and desire to see all the sights, like Rio: I just think...I don't know, she might wanna hear my side too, maybe, and it might help if she does Buster: Yeah Buster: I wish we could take Jay. I hate the thought of leaving her with Chlo right now Buster: And she can work any room, 'course Buster: No chance of staying mad with that face around Rio: Yeah Rio: I don't trust her as a Mum, I wouldn't say that just 'cos I'm the petty new woman, you know that Rio: I seriously don't Rio: but you said her 'rents are decent and do most of the work Rio: Sure they still will be, they'll look after her, even if Chlo won't Buster: Same. It's what scares me about her. More than anything she's ever threatened Buster: Thank Christ she still lives at home Buster: And Jay's too young to believe any shit she says against me Rio: She's going to know who you are, and what a good Dad you are Rio: You'd never let Chlo get away with that, and Jay wouldn't believe her over you Rio: who's put in the actual work, after-all Rio: just another thing she'll lament about, wah wah no one loves me Buster: I need to believe that or I'll properly crack up like Rio: Its the truth Rio: I promise you Buster: You're the best Buster: I know it shouldn't be a competition of who I fucked over more or whatever but you or Erin would never do this Rio: Most wouldn't Rio: Unlucky for you, you found one who will go above and beyond to fuck up your life Buster: Yeah Buster: How soon could you leave for NYC? Rio: As soon as you can Rio: Not ideal for either of us but Rio: Gotta be done Buster: I'm emailing my professors to get extensions and shit as we speak, not that a family emergency anywhere near covers it Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: No shorthand for this situation Rio: Though I'm sure they'd all love to know the drama Buster: Oh fuck, all my old friends are gonna lap this up Buster: Been waiting on my fall from grace Rio: Do you care? Rio: Most of them were cunts, has to be said Buster: Only thinking of you, babe. Not to late for you to hit up James again and choose him instead Rio: Please Rio: He was good for a warm bed and nothing else, you fool Rio: Try to forget that ever happened, like Buster: Good. Me too Rio: I already wanted you then Buster: I know Buster: And you know I did too, yeah? Rio: I knew for definite after Rio: Got no poker face and the jealousy was palpable, babe Buster: Fuck off Buster: Not my fault you're proper desirable Rio: Just write that on a postcard and be done with it, I reckon Rio: They'll all understand Buster: You just saved us a trip. Well done Rio: Always thinking, me Rio: Now we can hide forever just you and me Buster: I'm thinking my ma's poker face skipped a generation and my daughter got it all Buster: Yeah. I'm looking at flights there and not back, casually Rio: I reckon you might be right Rio: she certainly knows how to wrap you around her little finger already Buster: You being giving her sly lessons? I know her mother can't teach her anything about that Rio: What can I say? Make the most of my time Rio: Nah, just a girl after my own heart, like Buster: Take your word on that like Buster: We might need that hustle you've got if my parents disown me so can't complain Rio: They won't will they? Mine either Rio: Oh God Buster: I don't see how mine can after how they got together Buster: Basically brother and sister depending who you ask Buster: But who knows Rio: And everyone knows about Joe and Ronnie but they still talk to them Rio: am I just being stupid and naive thinking it might end up okay? Rio: not just wishful thinking is it Buster: True. I forgot about them, which shows how many fucks I give Buster: We can do this Buster: It ain't illegal, even if Chlo reckons otherwise. I could marry you if I wanted like Rio: Yeah, it'll just be adjusting to it Rio: like we had to Rio: all we can do is give everyone time Rio: but they can't make us not Buster: Let them be mad if they gotta but I ain't Buster: I love you too much Rio: I love you Rio: I have to be with you Rio: I don't know where I'd be if you hadn't have been there for me throughout all the bad shit Buster: I know you'd have made it, but I'm still glad I was there anyway Buster: If only 'cause I'm a selfish cunt Rio: I don't know Rio: I just know I don't just need you, I want you too Rio: That's all Buster: I feel the same, trust me Buster: I know it's stupid but I can't help wondering what Edie would make of this Rio: Probably thank me for taking the heat off her... Rio: I think she'd get it, she got most things, even the shit other people didn't want to touch Buster: Yeah Buster: We can get a flight tomorrow if I throw enough cash at it. Can you handle that? Rio: Yes Rio: Let's do this Buster: Make sure you tell Indie at least Buster: We can worry about Nance at the last possible moment Rio: Will do, at least she can cover for me if needs Buster: My mum and dad probably won't notice I've gone unless Chlo goes through with her threat and the shit hits the fan Rio: She's not got the bottle Rio: We'll be back to tell them as soon as we can Buster: Actually want you to be a know-it-all Buster: What's the world come to? Rio: Fuck knows, babe Rio: It ain't coming to an end though, not like she wants Buster: Come over tonight and I'll take you home to get packed in the AM Buster: Not leaving your side Rio: Of course Rio: I'm going to take care of you Buster: You can prove that to me later Buster: There's nothing I want more Rio: I'm going to Rio: Gonna show you why I'm worth this Buster: I already know Buster: But I'm always ready for you to tell me again Rio: You deserve it Buster: So do you, babe Rio: I love you so fucking much Buster: I love you too Buster: No matter what Rio: We're gonna have it all, remember? Buster: I won't forget Buster: I'm packing and I swear any drawer I pull out either has something of Jay's in or something that doesn't belong there which she's helpfully put there Buster: It doesn't feel like she was here long enough to do all that Buster: And it's gonna kill me if I can't see her again sometime soon Rio: You will Rio: That's why we're sorting this now, and not running Rio: For her, yeah? Buster: Us too though. 'Cause it has to be better in the long run Buster: We've done our share of lying and not saying what we mean Rio: Yeah Rio: We would've always had to have done this Rio: or stop Rio: she's forced our hand but Rio: I'm so tired of the lies anyway Buster: Agreed. Tempting as it'd be to wait until Jay's in college herself, I can't either Buster: She's done us a favor really, which she'll love Rio: Yeah, let that fuel you Rio: She's going to get nothing from this, she's only gonna fuck herself up Buster: Exactly. I tried to warn her as much Rio: She can't be told anything Rio: Fuck her Buster: Not again, cheers Rio: I'd be jealous but even my brain can't make that scenario believable Buster: Thank Christ 'cause if it could I'd have to reckon you don't know me like I thought you did Rio: No one's that self-destructive Rio: Not even you Buster: No arguments here Rio: Good Buster: Bad enough I did it the once Rio: Thank God for Jay Rio: otherwise that'd be nothing but an awkward regret forreal Buster: Any other mother if I could though, honestly Buster: I'd rather it was Indie even Rio: Um, I wouldn't Rio: She is all you though, sure you could've got her from someone else like Buster: Yeah? You reckon Buster: I wonder what the next one will be like when she's born Rio: Same Rio: Exciting Buster: We've been throwing some names around and none of them have made me cringe like Chlo's choice of middle name for Jay so that's a start Rio: That's a start Rio: All I know is she'll be dead cute too Buster: I'm sure Erin will be well happy you feel that way about her like Buster: But seriously, you're too much and I can't get enough of you still Rio: Shut up, she might not legit try and murder me like Chlo but I still don't think I should try my luck, like Buster: You'd be within your rights to murder Chlo yourself, some of the shit she said Rio: Yeah? Rio: Can't say I'm surprised Buster: I wasn't either Buster: Shut her up anyway though Rio: 'Course you did, so chivalrous forever Rio: My hero Buster: What can I say? I know what you like Buster: She tried to talk shit about Nancy too Rio: Cunt Rio: Nance is 10 times the person she'll ever be Buster: Yeah Buster: She proved it by bringing her up, as if she hadn't done enough already Buster: Trying to call her a freak 'cause in her mind it compares, the monsters she reckons we are and Nance being gay Rio: Shown herself up there Rio: Think what you like about us but get with the times on the gay thing, babe Buster: And she thinks she's the one fit to raise my daughter while I ain't Buster: Jay could be gay for all we know Rio: I don't think she even thinks that, she just chats shit for her own benefit Rio: She can't possibly think she's doing good Rio: Don't know if she cares Buster: Pretty sure she doesn't Buster: She basically said she only wanted Jay so she could play happy families with me Buster: Like there was no point to being a parent if she couldn't have that Rio: What the fuck Rio: She's so Rio: You had no say, she did Rio: she should've really wanted her Rio: So horrible Buster: I wish I could take Jay off her but there's no way Rio: Yeah that'd be near impossible Rio: She's not that level of awful Rio: When you're finished with Uni, set up, she'll have to custody share properly Rio: Get that sorted Buster: Yeah Buster: Maybe she'll get better over time, once the new baby is here and me and you are still going strong, giving her no choice but to accept things even if she doesn't want to see sense Rio: Can but hope, babe Buster: Fuck it I'm coming there. I need a drink. Buster: And seeing you wouldn't hurt either Rio: Yeah? Rio: I won't be mad about that either Buster: I'll stay until you're done. Keep you company like you've done for me Rio: I'll get to pouring Buster: Good Buster: Be there soon