#They're buddies and close friends you can't tell me otherwise | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hercolorchaos · 3 months

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i actually wanted to make a post about how taekookers, some armys, jinkookers, yoonminers are making those tweets about as to how jm and jk enlisting through buddy program means they're not dating and how gay couples can't enlist in military without exposing themselves and i actually found this thread and IT IS hillarious specially coming from taekookers out of all people.

taekookers out of all people saying it IS funny because for years like literally years they have been wanting, hoping and waiting for tae and jk to enlist together cause years ago(and Maybe recently too) taehyung said that he's planning to enlist together with jungkook. the problem is not them holding onto that promise but the problem is them suddenly making a 180degree turn to the whole "enlisting together" thing. they all were so sure about tk's enlistmemt that they used to use that thing even in arguments. i remember having arguments with tkkrs here and there and them going "shut up you don't know anything cause tk are going to do ms TOGETHER" and i was like "okay good for them". that was way before group hiatus even. They were hoping for the same, even thought that tk gonna use companion system but as soon as the news of jm and jk going together came they suddenly don't know how to cope so they went with "I'll only belive it when more media talks about it", when more media covered the same thing they were like I'm gonna wait for dispatch (one of the captain of their ship according to tkkrs), when dispatch said the same thing they went with "I'll wait for bighit" and when bighit also confirmed the same thing they went with "there's two different notices and English version of weverse doens't say companionship so I'll wait till they enlist or I'll only belive what tae and jk says" etc etc like jeez so many excuses just to admit one simple and normal thing??? They still haven't stopped mind you cause they're still on their next excuse "my korean friend or my friend who learned korean told me that jm and jk are not together in ms and media won't say it cause they already spread the lie about them going together so they can't back off now". I'm not even lying but that is what they're doing currently.

"gay couple can't do military service together cause it's banned in sk" hmmm then may i know why every single Tkkr was hoping for tk to enlist together? why none of Y'all ever thought about this thing when y'all were holding onto that thing for years? why did none of Y'all said "why is taehyung saying he's gonna enlist together with jk? it means they're not a couple" like why did none of Y'all said this before? why y'all acting woke only now? why y'all caring about sk punishing people serving in military that are gay NOW??? like i honestly want atleast one of them to explain to me WHY ONLY NOW??? what changed?

coming back to jkk being couple and enlisting together, i personally has always thought of these two as very very close friends and they gonna be close friends for me until proven otherwise. BUT to the people who says "jikook enlisting together through buddy program is a proof of them not being a couple" i wanna ask why? why would the sk government think of jkk as a gay couple and punish them? did jm and jk came out as queer? have they ever disclosed their sexuality to anyone? have they told the world that they're gay couple? so why would sk government think of them as gay couple and punish them? let me tell you one thing outside of this shipping bubble to the whole world jm and jk are het and they are only friends. jm and jk has spent half their lives in front of cam for hours a day and IF they're queer then they're doing this job of hiding their sexuality on daily basis so i promise y'all THEY GONNA BE FINE and y'all don't have to worry about them. they knows what they're doing and they are two grown ass men who knows how to behave when there's tens of people around them so they are fine.

another excuse is "jungkook wanted to go to special force with taehyung" like first things first he said"i wanted to do special force service". next is if anyone knows jungkook then you should know very well that this man is known for doing adventures things in BTS. he loves those kind of things so of course his first thought would be going for special force service but then with so many tattoes on his hands on display he might have known he would get restriction in many things. even if he didn't know about it while getting the tattos, idt it bothers him too much that he couldn't do it. now now we know jungkook can't do special force (the one where taehyung is but there's other options open for him ig) so why did taehyung didn't choose to do what jungkook is doing so he can be together with jungkook? why does none of Y'all expect anything from tae's side but always jk has to do? if jk had no options then tae had right? so why didn't he chose enlisting with jungkook?? "why would tae do that when he wants to do special force training" yeah so it's simple he chose the special force service like he wanted to (given that they had to do ms) and nothing like the delulu theories y'all made up in your head. no company is forcing two grown ass men to do anything which will affect their mental health means if being separated would have affected tk's mental health in any way (this is for the people who says "there's no sparkle in jk's eyes he's missing his taehyungie hyung", "bring back these two together", it's also funny how they think jk is unhappy without tae but they don't have any problem admitting that tae looks happy in whatever he's doing currently lol so only jk is suffering according to tkkrs) neither the company nor tk would play with their mental health if they thought being apart from e/o would take a toll on them so Accept it that both jungkook and taehyung are doing whatever they thought is best for them.

yoonminers and taekookers are two sides of the same coin so there's no need to address them separately. about jinkookers then they all think the same that gay couple won't enlist together but at the same time they think jk chose Buddy program cause that would automatically make him serve in frontline where jin is, jm knows about it so he helped jinkook and they're happy jinkook can meet e/o in ms quite contrary if you ask me.

At some point Taehyung MIGHT have talked about the enlistment with jungkook too and we might never know about it (like I'm open for this option too) but what remains as the fact is that even if jungkook couldn't join special force like tae, tae had all the options/choices to get into Buddy program with jungkook and be together till discharge yet it's jm and jk who's in ms now and nothing anyone says can change that fact. So the "tk couldn't be together because of tattoes and they had no option" is a complete lie so get over it.

using Buddy program gives you no privilege cause you're simply gonna serve in one of the most dangerous area that is frontline so it would be helpful for everyone if they they accept that the boys know what they're doing and move along with it. y'all should be happy that atleast they have someone with them to rely on in the difficult times of their life.

anyways, here's the thread i found on twitter if anyone wants to check.

https://twitter.com/Luuunnyyyy/status/1749398985133936722?t=elWkrli73AvBdVuGltqi4A&s=19

This is also for the people who thinks jm and jk ONLY enlisted together because they had no choice and that they're coworkers.

p.s. if anyone read this post then sorry for all that bad English nd mistakes.

#jimin #jungkook #jikook #taekook #jkkrs #tkkrs #ynmnrs #jnkkrs

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golbrocklovely · 4 months

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What's you opinion on the colby and mlp drama? I see some fans are mad at him for "breaking her heart", cause the poor girl was waiting around for 8 years in the hopes of him finally making her his girlfriend and he has the audacity to date another girl. For all we know they're never been in a committed relationship.Her fans should be encouraging her to finally getting over him and move on.

i've gotten an ask about this before, a week or so back. i was against commenting on it just bc i don't want to give mlp the time of day. but as things have slowly played out, via her and her fans… i don't really feel the need to stay silent on it.

there's a lot i'm probably gonna say, so this will most likely be a very long post lol

and to those of you that hate-read the shit i post - especially since you like mlp so much - i ask you kindly to read completely thru. i know that's a lot, but please consider doing it, especially before you send in an ask calling me a "dick rider" for colby just bc i don't immediately say he's a slut and a douchebag for breaking her heart :)

i'm gonna give the briefest of rundowns for those that don't know.

first off, if you want to know how i feel about mlp, here is an ask i answered a while ago detailing most (if not all) of the shit she has done over the years.

secondly tbh, i never understood her relationship with colby. sure, they were always weirdly flirty, seemingly in a will-they-won't-they type of thing. but her livestreams have painted an ENTIRELY different picture. one that paints her as a bit…. unhinged, imo. he doesn't look great either, but i'll get into it.

now, what has been happening recently: i pop in occasionally to her streams but for the most part i steer clear bc she annoys me too much. i have friends that tell me everything, plus you guys. but i have witnessed some stuff with my own two eyes. when she first started streaming, she was NONSTOP talking about colby. answered any and all questions about him, how they were super close, talked about adventure buddies, said all the good poems in her book are about him, even saying she was gonna have him on at some point soon. and she was gonna have him in videos soon as well.

as you have pointed out, anon, her fans are mad that he "broke her heart" but how that became "reality", so to speak, stems from this: her sister asked her what she was doing for nye, and mlp said she had no plans bc "no one asked her yet" to do anything. fast forward to after colby's bday, aka around the time the pics of him and m leaked, and suddenly mlp is not streaming.

the stream she did a couple days after colby's bday is a new level of crazy i haven't seen from her bc she just aired it ALL out. and even if she didn't do that, her fans with their big ass mouths on twitter, insta, and tiktok, have been doing it for her.

she explained to her chat that she just went thru a breakup, basically. that it was an eight/nine year long situationship that was on and off again…. interestingly, her and colby have been friends since 2015. which would be…. eight/nine years.

very clearly, she is talking about colby, without saying his name.

now, there was someone in chat that said something about situationships, someone else asked what a situationship is, and the person replied with "a sexual relationship but with no commitment" or something vaguely like that. mlp immediately said "oh that's not what i had."

………so, you're telling me that whatever went on between the two of them….. wasn't sexual…. at all??? maybe i don't understand what a situationship is then, bc i was under the impression that the SEX PART was kinda the whole point. otherwise…. you just kinda have a friendship. an emotional situationship is just not a thing lol

even tho she kept telling her chat "i can't talk about this", she just kept going. she said that la changes ppl, that she thought they were on the same page for years and then all of sudden things took a turn. she thought she knew him well bc she was so close to him for so long. she can't talk about it publicly bc it's "too obvious" and she has to stay offline bc it's all on social media (which really just… seals the deal that it's about colby lol). she said she cried in his face and he said nothing. she also, verbatim, said "it's like one week you're their everything and then the next they want to go party and be with crazy girls and i'm not crazy" which…. cmon girl. you might as well have said m's name atp.

now, with all of this out of the way… how do i personally feel about this, since my opinion is so valid lol jk

for years, mlp has made it her mission to plant the seeds thru out the fandom that her and colby were secretly dating behind the scenes. that they had something going on but "oh guys, i can't talk about it ;)", playing coy and never outright shutting down the rumors. i have literal ss from her fan accounts saying "you guys don't know the truth. of course colby would never tell the full story" and shit like that. these are fans that fully were in GROUP CHATS with her for years, listening to her every word. so it's very clear to me she was telling them directly what was going on.

or at least the good parts - that her and colby were a thing.

but colby CONSISTENTLY has said time and time again that he is single, that he is not looking for a gf, that he hasn't had one since 2016, that he hasn't met someone he wants to spend the rest of his life with. he has said all of that to us for YEARS. now, unless bts he was saying to mlp "oh baby, you know i'm just lying to the fans" that is the ONLY WAY he would be completely in the wrong here. regardless, colby has been seen publicly with girls so. many. times. mlp has been called out for liking edits making fun of said girls! she's also been rumored to be his guard dog, to loom over him, that he needs to "keep his bitch on a lease" - and the ppl who said this were the girls that were fucking with him. so she isn't in the dark that he is with other ppl.

and again, a situationship is NONCOMMITTAL. that means they aren't dedicated to each other. she herself has been with other guys, she admitted that. so why is it colby is the asshole here?

her fans are claiming that he flaked on her, that he chose m over her….. babes, that's not how this works. first off, again - noncommittal. these are the terms and conditions they BOTH agreed to. they have been playing this cat and mouse game since like 2016. nothing about their relationship has changed since then, let's be honest here. secondly, she literally said out loud "no one has asked me" aka COLBY DIDN'T MAKE PLANS WITH HER. so, he can't flake on someone he didn't make plans with. and this is no shade to mlp - but she doesn't drink, she doesn't party. colby for years has always been a partier. what exactly was he supposed to do with her on nye???? i'm not saying that to be mean. i say this as someone who is a wallflower, a stick in the mud, a prude, a straight-edge, ect ect. i haven't partied since i was in my early 20s. i get the lifestyle she has. i'm just saying realistically, of course he's not gonna want to hang out with her on one of the biggest nights to party.

now, all of this is not to say that she is the only one that did wrong in this situationship. colby should have said something long before now. but he liked that she emotionally supported him, he liked he could rely on her for his emotional needs to be fulfilled. he should have realized how deeply into him she was. he should have cut the chord long before things got to what they are today. but to bring it back to mlp, since this is about her mostly - she is 30. THIRTY. she has been playing this game since her early 20s. she knew what she signed up for. they haven't even had sex. with all that deep emotional bond shit they had going on - they never got intimate in that way. and clearly, she never had a problem with it. until now.

i think for the entirety of their relationship, mlp knew at the drop of a hat colby would come running to her - and vice versa. i think this is the ONE TIME he chose someone else over her. that, tied with the fact that she was making all these promises of him being in her content - videos, her documentary, streams - she NEEDED colby to say yes to all of this. and maybe he said yes, but then changed his mind. maybe he said he was too busy, and when she found out what he was busy with (hanging out with m on nye), it finally clicked that he was not into her like she was into him. even tho as a fan that has been obvious for years now.

and while i don't like mlp, i don't wish her harm. i don't wish her to be heart broken or sad. i know exactly what she is going thru. all of my dating experience has been unrequited love. i get it. trust me. however, you can't play innocent and naive. you knew what colby was doing all this time. and sure, he's a dick for not stopping this sooner. but you clearly knew what was up - YOU COULD HAVE LEFT. you had years, eight years in fact, to leave at any point. but you accepted what you could get, and you milked it for all it was worth. not to mention, but how did you expect him to want to be with you when you are in gcs with his minor fans talking about him constantly??? that man likes to keep things private, and you were basically shouting it from the rooftops.

not only that, but you played the fun game of shitting on any girl he was friends with or hooking up with. and only apologized when you got called out for it. and then tried to play the whole "i'm all for women supporting women" bs. let's be real honest, cards on the table - you only support women when you deem them as nonthreatening. the moment a woman is competition to you, especially in regards to getting attention from colby, you shit on them. bc you're scared. you're scared he will choose them over you.

also this doesn't even take into the fact that why would you want him to date you at this point when he has made it clear he doesn't like you like that? you want him to lie and pretend to be into you?

all of this being said, while i do have some sympathy for her, i also really don't. and the reason for it is bc she LIES. she egregiously lies, and has done it multiple times in her live streams (and obviously for years now).

here's two main ones, off the top of my head: one, she said she doesn't who corey scherer is…… besides the fact that apparently she has been in colby's life since basically corey was there, i find it hard to believe she doesn't know who he is. one reason is bc she used to go over to the old trap house. she 100% met him. and you know why i know this? reason number two, SHE IS IN THE BACKGROUND OF ONE OF COREY'S VIDEOS. she is there, sitting next colby. watching corey do something goofy for his vlog. why she would lie about this, idk.

two, and this is a bit of a weird one, she said she doesn't like zoos. she said bc she's vegan, zoos make her upset and cry and that she wants animals to be free or whatever. okay, hey, that's valid. and you might be like "how is this a lie?" well, back in september, when snc were in hot topic. she went with colby to said store. you know what they did after that (maybe even before)? THEY WENT TO A ZOO. i got the video clips of her giggling with colby over a capybara. the last time she seemingly hung out with him publicly was THEM GOING TO A ZOO. when she answered this question on stream, i was confused. bc she literally was just at a zoo with colby. so why lie??

she doesn't even benefit from lying about this shit. so what is the point?

and the reason why a lot of this deeply pisses me off is bc of how two faced these fans of hers (and colby's) are. in chat, she will have ppl kissing her ass, saying colby is a shitty guy. he's emo trash, he's a douche, they want beat the shit out of him from breaking her heart. he's a slut, and they even trash m. all that. but then, weirdly, on twitter and on xplrclub these same exact fans are begging, PLEADING, for colby to give them a crumb of attention. making edits of him, buying the merch, tagging him relentlessly. so… which is it? is he a dickhead, or is he this swell guy you want to have say your name in chat? pick a fucking lane.

okay. i'm done now :) lol

#ask #personal #cb ll #no seriously this is very long #grab a snack or something

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claudemblems · 2 years

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Heyo idk if requests are still open but I don't see a post saying they're closed so I hope it's okay that I slide in with an idea 👀

This may be pretty similar to the Sylvain & Kaeya request you just did so feel free to ask for a different idea lol but I wonder what you think about Childe and Sylvain with a reader who doesn't fluster easily and is just always like "okay buddy" whenever he flirts with them? Bonus points if reader actually likes him but is beating their feelings back with a stick bc they think that he can't possibly be genuine

Thank you for sending a request in! I actually just write with fem readers in mind but I didn’t use any exclusively female terms for these. I also tried to follow the same format as the Friends to Lovers one with just sets of headcanons. I hope this is all right!! I’m just happy to get another request like that one because it was super fun to write about :) This did turn out kinda angsty but I felt like it fit with the overall theme. It's time to make your hearts hurt LOL

Friends But...Not Lovers?

Summary: Childe and Sylvain try and fail to win you over, but what they don't know is you've been purposely withholding your own feelings from them, too.

Notes: I tried to make these a little shorter because I tend to write way too much lol. I hope they're not too short though. Also, each set of headcanons is divided into the boys' perspectives and yours.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Childe

Childe isn’t fazed at all by your nonchalant attitude. In fact, he finds it really attractive. He’s a man that likes a challenge, after all!

“C’mon, you’re bound to crack at some point! You can’t tell me you don’t feel a little bit bashful?” “Are you calling all that flirting? I thought it was just a really bad attempt at comedy.”

The thing with Childe is that he’s not satisfied until he wins, so don’t expect him to give in so easily. He’s persistent if anything.

Of course, he wouldn’t flirt so brazenly with you if it actually made you uncomfortable. He may do questionable things, but he’s not without morals.

Especially when it comes to you. He wants to keep you safe and happy, more so than anyone else in the world.

Thankfully for him, you’ve told him before that his flirting doesn’t faze you and that you’d actually like to see if he could manage to successfully fluster you, which only spurs him on even more.

It’s game on, and he’s not going home until he secures his decisive victory.

You

You can talk the talk, but that unbothered facade of yours hides something under the surface: your real feelings for him.

Sure, you could try to imagine that Childe means what he says, but it’s hard to tell when he’s being genuine and when he’s playing a part.

Can you really allow yourself to be swayed by his words when one order from the Tsaritsa can steal him away from you forever?

You’re not someone to get involved in a relationship that’s doomed from the start. You don’t have the kind of thick skin you need to come out unscathed.

Sometimes you wonder if all this is just a game to Childe, if winning your affections would just be another trophy on his shelf.

But you try not to think about it too much. It just leaves you confused and upset.

You can’t deny, however, that you truly enjoy his company. He’s unlike any other person you’ve met on your journeys. Being with him is a breath of fresh air in your otherwise uneventful life.

If the day ever comes where you’re faced with accepting Childe’s declaration of love or rejecting it…only time will tell if he’s managed to convince you of this lie, too.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Sylvain

Ngl Sylvain is actually very pleasantly surprised by this revelation.

After seeing how all the women he’s flirted with eat up any compliments he gives them, your unaffected deadpan demeanor is absolutely hilarious to him. It’s definitely a first for him.

“Are my methods of flirting getting stale or are you just hard to break?” “It’s a little bit of both.” “Ouch.”

This is all very interesting to him but also very confusing. Talk about being totally unprepared.

However, his inability to make you fall for him has actually made him head over heels in love with you instead. But how is he supposed to win your heart if his words don’t affect you at all?

On many occasions he finds himself staring off into the distance trying to use that big brain of his to come up with a way to convince you that he truly does care about you. Though, it’s really hard to come off as genuine when all of his prior relationships have been made of thinly-veiled compliments and surface-level attraction.

You’re the only person who hasn’t been wooed by his words, looks, or his crest. You’re that one in a million. An anomaly. The kind of person Sylvain has been searching for his whole life.

And Sylvain will do whatever it takes to prove to you that he can be your one in a million, only if you’ll give him the chance to.

You

You wish you could tell Sylvain to his stupidly beautiful face that his words actually do have an effect on you.

But you’re afraid of becoming just another name on his list of women he loves for one week and discards the next.

Out of all the guys in Garreg Mach, why did you have to be in love with the resident womanizer???

Day in and day out you go back and forth in your mind trying to figure out if it’s worth giving him a shot. Having feelings for Sylvain is utterly exhausting. Unfortunately they’re not like an item you can simply exchange for another.

You do have to admit that it pricks your heart a little each time you see him being a little extra friendly with another woman. Was it it that they have that you don’t? Can you really compare to all of the ones he’s dated?

You hope Sylvain never has any actual romantic feelings for you. With his kind of history, there’s no way a relationship with him could ever last. But would it be worth it for that one small period of happiness?

Who are you kidding? He’s a man that has everything. Someone like you trying to win his love would just prove to be a lost cause.

For now, you’ll just have to settle with watching him walk arm-in-arm with another girl he’s confessed to, praying that the sorrow in your heart will one day begin to disappear.

#claudemblems writes #genshin impact #genshin x reader #childe #childe x reader #fe3h #three houses x reader #sylvain #sylvain x reader

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seasonal-writes · 1 year

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If you want to, please elaborate on tango and impulse... their dynamic is so so good<3

-🍂

well i meaaan.. if you really wannaa heaaar.. cracks knuckles SO. essentially, if it wasn't obvious, Tango and Impulse have been attached at the hip for a LOOOONG time in this canon. Impulse's official "title" is like, Personal Guard to the Heir. His only assignment, unless stated otherwise, is to ensure Tango's safety and well-being—meaning they practically "grew up" together because he was constantly tailing him and keeping watch. so you can imagine they know each other veeery well, because Tango's had Impulse as a guard for like, ten or so years? they're genuine friends, of course! best friends, i'd even say, asss tango was actually lowkey a recluse/kinda sheltered? so he'd interact with whoever he had in the castle's vicinity in the Nether, and that happened to be Impulse. so this random, older kid's assigned as his guard and tango's like "it's free real estate" and YES they used to get into trouble together. Impulse has turned his head at maaany of Tango's shenanigans, and Tango never stood for Impulse being punished for anything by higher ups. And when they tried to find Tango someone else after too many convenient "I just wasn't paying attention"'s from Impulse, Tango had a melt. down. That was the first time Impulse ever saw Tango have a real moment of rage, and you can imagine that there were more than just a few scorched painting to deal with, and that Impulse was immediately re-instated as his personal guard. i was actually JUST talking to a friend of mine about how it's canon that Impulse is a few years older than Tango, and he was given this position while training to be an official knight. so i always look SO FONDLY on the image of a tall and quiet, awkward young Impulse with a training sword next to an equally-as-awkward teenage Tango at like, parties and events 'n things. we were making jokes that Tango turns to him like "You gotta start talkin' to some people, buddy. You look too scary." and Impulse is just like "I don't get paid enough to talk to people." It's so funny to me, and that definitely says a TON about their dynamic. Impulse is definitely still quiet, but they're very chatty in private moments—which I tried to capture in chapter six. Impulse is literally a shadow when he's around more than just his prince, and i love the aesthetic of that claim with his blackstone armor and wallflower tendencies. But if there is even a slight change in Tango's tone to indicate discomfort, he's hovering right behind him with a glint in his eye and his weapon drawn. He's also bulkier and a little taller than Tango, too. So he's intimidating as hell.<33 ANYWAY. they're very close. and while Tango might not see it all the time, Impulse is insanely devoted to him. Like, Impulse would die before he let Tango get hurt, he'd break any rule and go to jail before even a hair on his head was disturbed. It's your usual Knight and Prince dynamic, but instead they're long-time best friends and the selflessness is cranked up to an 11. I also have this idea that Impulse doesn't know what he'll do without Tango to watch over. Sure, position change. Sure, there will be changes. But his purpose has been one thing for so long, and i'm sure the idea of Tango running away would be wildly devastating to him. so uh. do with this information what you will. i love them so much and i'd fully recommend sitting and thinking about all the scenarios of two goofy childhood buddies being put into things beyond their age, but still having each other at the end of the day. Or defending each other. Or just being soft pals. i'm so normal about them, can't you tell?

i'm also SO sorry for how long this is, holy cow. i just get very excited about all the characters and these two are a special case to me.

#leaf anon #considering this to be the 'post' i said i'd make #because it was easier and it'll still show up so :)#THANKS FOR TAKING THE INSANE AMOUNT OF INFORMATION AND BRAIN ROT LEAF ANON #you're a real one #seasonal-asks #golden rings lore #<- for tracking later if needed

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baeseungcheolie · 2 years

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𝑰𝒔 𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑨 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆? 𝑳𝒆𝒆 𝑫𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒉𝒚𝒖𝒄𝒌 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

Word Count - 2.4k

Genre - Smut

Warnings - Hard sex, slight use of nicknames, mentions of choking and gagging, oral, multiple positions, fat cock Haechan (wbk), nothing major otherwise

𝐏𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐅𝐚𝐧 𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐝𝐨𝐥(𝐬) 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞. 𝐃𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦.

"Do you really think you can stop yourself from coming?" You scoffed at that. "Hell yea. I told you I've definitely done it before, don't underestimate me buddy."

You had an interesting relationship with him. Growing up as childhood best friends you were automatically close and basically had the same personality, but puberty changed that a little bit.

What it didn't change though, was the fact that neither of you were quick to accept defeat, be a point, a prize or a competition. The same stubborness. Competitiveness between friends can be annoying, but this time something way more important was on stake.

Reputation and self respect.

"I feel like you're being over confidant here, you would break when it came to actually holding back," He said nonchalantly.

"Shut up Hyuck, you know nothing about me when it comes for sex," you muttered stubbornly.

"Alright, show me then."

You blinked in confusion, glancing at Hyuck beside you.

"What do you mean?" Your eyes widened in disbelief as you caught on to what he was referring to.

"Lets try it, you say you have amazing self control right? Lets do it then, show me."

"Hyuck... Show you what? I'm... I'm not sure what you're talking about"

He smirked at that.

"It's okay, you don't have you justify yourself. Just dial down on your nonsence the next time, it doesn't look good when you talk more bullshit than you can actually do." He said in a condescending manner.

Nonsense? BULLSHIT?! He crossed it.

"Alright let's do it."

"You sure?" Haechan glanced at me through his peripherals, the tellings of a sly smirk playing at his lips.

Ever since sophomore year of high school, he suddenly went from this super awkward short kid, to the hot mysterious kid with the most unique voice who everyone had a crush on. You were no different and found him really really attractive too, not that you'd tell him of course. That would just boost his big, fat ego.

His ego was the reason you guys were having this conversation in the first place. Last night when you were hanging out with your group of friends, Chae had questioned the guys' 'talents' in bed making you laugh in your very high state. People were being mocked in a joking manner, but some people (Lee Donghyuck) took it to heart and felt like he had a point to prove.

"Yea! I mean for it work the partner must know what they're doing right? I can't come if the guy doesn't know what he is doing," You said to him in a small mocking pout.

"You implying that I don't know how to make you cum, sweetheart?" A quiet laugh escaped him, a flick over his bottom tongue as his sharp jaw ticked in irritation. Ugh the head you wanted to give him. Wait what?

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fūck why did he have to be so hot.

He slowly walked towards you and positioned himself at the small couch and slowly part your legs and places your knees on his shoulders, caressing the plump flesh of your thighs.

You can't help but slightly shiver at his actions. "Donghyuck-"

"How about you shut your mouth now, hm?" He whispered softly, tugging my hips to the edge of the sofa to allow him better access. "I bet you'll need all that concentration."

Oh. You had to stop yourself from cumming. Right.

The thin underwear and pyjama shorts were shoved aside by long, lean fingers, revealing the very vulnerable area to him.

A delicious swipe of his tongue over your sex made you mewl in desire, heat gathering in your core.

He toyed with your labia, using the tip of his tongue to stimulate the outer area before he moved to the inner. Your vision was glassy as he finally made contact with your clit.

You couldn't help but whimper as he slowly works his fingers and tongue in rhythm. One large drag of his tongue before he flattened it and licked your clit harder, edging you further. You trying to keep your hands in place, finally deciding to grab his hair.

His soft hair falls on your thighs, lips making you lose your mind.

"Having fun love?" His mouth leaves your pussy as he asks for as second, but soon returning back, smirking against me as you glare at him trying to not to moan.

Cocky Bastard.

"Don't forget what's happening here..." He goaded. "You said you could stop yourself from cum-"

"I know what I said, you dick. I can do it," You say with a heaving chest

He raises his eyebrows and hums, continuing to suck your clit building up pleasure before slowing down, doing the same thing again.

As you feel myself wanting to cum, you automatically grip his hair harder, eyes shut way to tightly, thighs shaking.

"____ you're not supposed to cum, have you forgotten our challenge?" he asks in a warning tone.

"Fuck I don't care about the challenge Haechan, let me cum please," you say whimpering pathetically.

He quickened his pace, fluttering rapid kitten licks across your quivering clit before closing his perfect lips around it, suckling gently, stimulating at all angles.

You curse at your best friend.

How did live with him without having any idea of what he was capable of?

He soon added an addition to the two fingers that were in your now squelching pussy, carefully considering his angles and motions, continuesly sucking your clit.

"Fuck Hyuck it feels so good, I can't hold it"

He lewdly slurped against the hole, his tone satirical, "Didn't think so" and with that he stopped everything leaving you with teary eyes.

"Told you," he said smugly.

You put your underwear on, eyes burning with unshed tears and grab your bag without uttering a single word.

You felt humiliated, offended even. And extremely pissed off.

"Hey hey hey what's wrong," he asks you gently, concern laced in his voice

"Fuck you Haechan." You say and leave without sparing him a glance.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the next three days, you was pissed.

Not answering his texts, not answering his calls and ignoring him when he tried to approach you while you hung out with friends. Maybe you was being a little too harsh but it was his fault.

You told him you didn't care about the dumb challenge at a point and he took it far by not letting you cum. Laying in bed at 10pm, you thought about him.

'Did I really overdo the whole silent treatment?'

My roomate suddenly calls you, telling you to open the door. She had forgotten her things again, as she left to meet her girlfriend in a hurry. Must be nice.

As you opened the door, you see Hyuck solemnly looking at me, standing silently.

That bitch tricked me into seeing him.

He steps in then suddenly throws you over his shoulders, making way to your room before you could open my mouth to say something. Placing you down on my bed he hugs you tightly.

"I'm sorry," he whispers in a tiny voice. "I was just messing with you. I have had feelings for you since forever. I did not want to ruin our friendship because no friends have the thoughts i have about you. please don't ghost me again."

"Sorry for blowing it out of proportion baby," You say kissing his neck.

He pulls your face up to his and starts kissing you. After a while, you slide down on your knees. You couldn't wait anymore. The pent up sexual frustration in the both of you needed to be let out. Taking his dick out of his pants you spit and grab your fist around him. He stares down between his parted open long legs, fisting his length agonizingly slow. Circling and pulling up around his slit in your grip.

His tongue languidly dragging over his lower lip. Eyes gone half-lidded shielding a predatory gaze. His mouth parts open, lifting at the corners as thumb sweeps back and forth across the tip. His tone lowering, mixing with ragged breaths- "Your hands can barely fit around me baby."

He is right. Your thumb can hardly meet your index finger around his massive size. Thick long cock fattened up only after a few minutes of teasing. Your pussy tingles back to life between thighs gazing at the way his dick twitches in your hold.

Donghyuck reaches down shoving your hair back, large hands wrapping my throat snuggly, not sparing an inch of skin. He presses harder making your eyes roll back. You loved it. Love the way you need him. Sending me to the edge with constant threat of passing out any second.

"Start sucking." Hyuck tugs your neck forward. Eyes darkening with the 'request'. Mouth attempts to take him in, lips burning and stretching around the thick meaty tip. His strong hold forcing you down lower. Tears sprinkling out as your nose touches his pubic hair. "You can take it baby, keep going. Look so pretty full of me like that."

This encourages you to suck harder, wanting to do better and please him better than all the previous people he had slept with.

Haechan's stomach convulses and his hips twist up.

"Keep..doing that..keep going." He encourages you between whines breaking into whimpers. Hyuck chokes you firmly causing your eyes to roll back again. Tongue draped out smacking the fat weight of his size down. His pretty moans harmonizing with exhausted gasps of breath.

Body jolting forward shooting cum down your locked up throat. Loads of hot cum seeping to the back of your mouth with every struggling shot.

He pulls you back up, laying you down on the bed slowly.

"Such a pretty doll,” he tsked. “Will you let me reward you for being so good to me?" He asks. "No you Donghyuck, want you to fuck my. Please i can't take it anymore." You say with a whimper.

He nods and takes off his shirt. He comes onto the bed kissing you as your hands thread his hair.

He held his length in his fist and looks at you as you laid there looking angelic ready to be fucked senseless and pumped himself with a groan. Planting one of his arms next to your head, he propped himself. Teasing against your wet slit by sliding his length against it lazily, bumping into your clit. Making you whine for more. For all of him.

He chuckled and pushed his cock past your walls, loving how effortlessly he entered inside your wet cavern in one deep thrust. Fuck he was big. He sank inside even further and halted to give you some time to adjust. He kissed you slowly to distract me from the stretch. You felt like a virgin again, except this time, It felt great.

When he felt you were more comfortable, he throws both your legs over his shoulder and started rutting his hips at a steady pace. You whimper, knuckles clenching the sheets. He felt so good. You felt so filled.

"Don't hold back my love, let me hear your moans, give yourself to me," he purred, sinking inside me with long and deep strokes. He was snapping his hips and fucking you the way he wanted. "Hyuck," you sobbed, "Hy-haechan, fuck!"

He pulls out and flips you on your stomach. Cheek smashed against the mattress, his hand gripped firmly against the back of your neck, keeping you pinned as he mercilessly pounded into you from behind, fucked out cunt being practically abused.

His hand ran down the base of you stomach, fingertips finding the hooded nub, his thumb ran over the sensitive bundle of nerves. Suddenly pinching your clit, the sensation making you lose your mind.

You gasped as an endless wave of moans fell from you lips, mind becoming hazy as you high pushed forward with every passing second. You hear his growls, he wanted nothing more for you to be completely ruined before he came.

Donghyuck watched as your body shook underneath him, your futile attempt of trying to push his hand away from your clit only made him fuck harder, words didn't need to be exchanged, the change of pace made you know very well that he wasn't going stop.

Your moans turned into screams, his cock sliding roughly against your velvet walls, your grip on the sheets tightened as you whimpered."D-daddy, I'm gonna cum-" You barely managed to let out as you felt your legs getting ready to collapse.

All it took was that last little flick of his thumb to send your body over the edge, walls clamping down around him. You moaned as you came all over his cock, body going limp as Hyuck's arms wrapped around your curvaceous hips.

Tears mix with the mess of drool on the sheets beneath your dumb face, eyes rolled back, mouth slightly parted open. Drops of sweat pool down your bodies, the room rich with the smell of sex.

"Hyuck please!" I cry out, not really know what you were begging for. Hearing you beg he just growls and continues to piston his hips in an out of you brutally, harder and somehow faster making more tears stream down your eyes.

It's like an explosion when he climaxes. Donghyuck pulls you impossibly close, body hunched over yours, sinking his teeth into the column of your neck as he fills you up to the brim, trying not to moan out loud, more than satisfied when he feels you tighten around him.

After a while he pulls out and grabs the box of tissues in your bedside drawer cleaning you up, collapsing next to you in exhaustion after.

You both laid there in silence, coming down from your highs, his eyes diverted over to meet your own, arms wrapping around your waist as he pulled you against his chest.

"What now?" You ask him. "Now I ask you to be my girlfriend and then court you till we get married." He says cockily. You laugh and apologize again. "I'm sorry for ghosting you."

"If you do that, I will tie you to the kitchen table and make all our friends watch me fuck you" You opened my mouth to speak but just blinked before not saying another word.

You didn't want to test him on now, maybe later.

Check out my Nomin fic if you'd like!

Please reblog if you liked the fic, Requests and taglist is open ♡

Divider source - @softachi

Image source - twitter

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alirhi · 3 years

Text

10 Sebastian roles as boyfriends

Because... I'm bored and I feel like it. 😂 Probably some spoilers for, like... everything? So yeah... That.

Putting it under here for easy scrolling:

10: Chase Collins

Who doesn't love a goofball? In the first half of the movie, Chase is basically perfect. He's sweet, funny, not all caught up in his ego, and actually pays attention to what the girls around him are saying, not just to what he wants to hear. If not for the whole... it was all an act to get close to Caleb and try to steal his magic thing, Chase would actually be a damn good high school boyfriend. He's adorable and would be a fun date, but he's also only 18 so best not to start making long-term plans lol. Also, y'know... the whole psycho revenge/power grab thing.

9 Jack Benjamin

Y'all. Y'all. Words cannot describe how much I love Jack. Pretty sure I've made this clear. As a person/character in general, he's absolutely in my Top 3 - not just of Sebastian's characters, but any character ever. ❤ But as a boyfriend? Boy's got baggage. It's what makes me so protective of him, but seeing as how he's trapped in the closet thanks to his overbearing homophobic family and the insane expectations heaped on him, as the show left him, he can't handle an honest relationship. He's too easily influenced by all the wrong people, poor babe.

8 Chris (Destroyer)

On paper, undercover cop sounds cool and exciting, but even if you ignore the fact that he, y'know, dies... Chris got in too deep and kinda lost the mission, so to speak. Best case scenario, you're his sexy partner and in on it all with him and end up on the lam for the rest of your lives. Worst case, this man lies for a living, so can you even trust him? And... yeah. The whole dead thing. Chris is hot af but getting involved with him is a recipe for disaster.

7 Ben

Min and Hathor have mercy, I love Ben! He's smart, he's snarky, he's caring and loyal... he's an absolute disaster. He's another one who seems allergic to honesty, until his lying and avoiding nearly kill his girlfriend. Not exactly relationship goals lol. Everything before totally was, though! Ben's adorable, and I love how he stayed up all night to protect his girlfriend (from a ghost/demon thing... with a baseball bat. I said he was smart, not perfect, okay? XD points for effort lol)

6 Mickey Henry

I. LOVE. MICKEY. Oml I love Mickey. He's a spazz and - even more so than Ben - an absolute disaster of a human being, but I love him. Pros for dating Mickey Henry: he's fun, he's carefree, he'll cook for you even though he's kinda bad at it lol, he loves his son and wants to be a good dad, he wants his partner to be happy and to love life as much as he does. Cons, and the reason he's not higher on the list: He's a pushover; easily influenced by the toxic people in his life, and it gets him into a lot of trouble. Being easily influenced by toxic dumpster fire of a human being Chloe almost lost him the partial custody of his son that he barely even had. He's an absolute sweetheart, but he's a complete man-child, and dating him would often feel more like raising him.

5 Frank "Suffer Buddy"

Come on! You know he and Mickey had to be back-to-back - they're practically the same character! 😂 Frank is Mickey... slightly more grown up. He's still a disaster, but he's respectful of boundaries, he's caring, he's funny in a dry, witty way that I just adore, and hoo lordy that man is a giver! 🥴🥵 Honestly, if he didn't smoke and didn't ditch Daphne in the middle of a party hours away from everything familiar to her surrounded by strangers to go do drugs, I'd call Frank perfect. He listened, he respected her wishes, he tried to keep some distance between them when he found out she'd gone on a date with his best friend (it failed utterly and brought us to the "damn that man's good with his mouth" portion of the movie lmao but still)... I don't have a whole lot of experience with men who actually give a shit, okay? So Frank is like a goddamn unicorn to me lmao. But that drug thing... That keeps him at the bottom of the Top 5 for me. Sorry, bb

4 Bucky

I can already hear everyone on here raging at me for placing Bucky so low on this list, but hear me out: I love this man. I love all four iterations of this man. Flirty 40s Bucky was a doll (fun date, not commitment material). Post-POW camp 40s Bucky had a fire to him that set me on fire. The Winter Soldier can choke me any damn day. Unf. And TFATWS Bucky... Oh, lady above, 2023 Bucky is a gem! He's sweet, snarky, and broken. He feels utterly, wretchedly alone in the world, and everyone around him, including his only friend, is telling him to "man up" and "make amends" for shit that was never his fault to begin with, rather than helping him come to terms with all that he's suffered and all that he's survived. Bucky needs and deserves love. A relationship with him would be so solid, if he found the right person... But it would take a fuck ton of work. He needs someone strong, patient, and more stubborn than he is to prod him until he finds a better therapist and actually opens up, and to keep him on track because even good therapy comes with homework. He does have to "do the work," Sam was right about that much, but he was way off base with what that "work" is. Bucky needs help and understanding, and he would be an amazing boyfriend... if he found someone with the strength to help him weather his nightmares and flashbacks, and help pull him out of this PTSD pit he's been in since 1943.

3 Chris Beck

Big brains turn me on, okay? 😂This man is an astronaut and a surgeon! Yes, please! Come here, you sexy genius! He's smart, he's funny - pretty sure Sebastian is incapable of playing anyone who's not delightfully snarky lol. He's pragmatic when he needs to be but there's also nothing he wouldn't do or risk for the ones he loves. This man is husband material and I cannot be convinced otherwise! So why isn't he #1? Cuz of the whole... spending years in space, thing. Super cool job and I'd be his biggest fan on the ground, but god damn, I would miss him while he's away!

2 TJ Hammond

Look, I'm gender fluid and he's a little bit bi 😂😂😂 Let me have my fantasy, okay? TJ's definitely got a lot of shit to work through, but love brings out the best in him. Before that fucking closeted shitbag broke his heart and stomped on it for good measure, TJ was clean and sober for months, he was happy, he was playing piano again, he was pulling himself together. Not only would he be an amazing boyfriend, but his partner would get the extra joy of getting to watch their love and devotion to him be the thing that saves this beautiful man's life. It's not healthy overall to tie your self worth and will to live to a relationship, but if he found the right person who would be there for him through all of life's shit and stick it out, I think he'd be okay. Even after his lowest point and without the support of his family, TJ still had a dream and he still chased it. He's not just the sweetest person to ever grace our screens, but he's ambitious and business-savvy, too. Keep him off drugs and watch this man take over the world, I'm telling you!

So why is TJ only #2? Well, besides the fact that he's like 99% gay and I have no bits he'd be interested in lmao, there's also the fact that this guy owns my heart:

1 Will Franklyn

And not just because we get to see him wet and mostly naked lol. Will is fucking perfect. I would die for this man... because he's already shown that he would die for his love. He almost fucking did, and they weren't even together yet! He's smart and very aware, he's a writer so we'd get to bond/geek out over books together, he's not all full of himself (self-deprecating humor ftw!) and he's willing to help a total stranger despite actual mortal peril, just because it's the right thing to do. Fierce, intelligent, sassy, strong-willed, and a flawless moral compass? YESYESYESYESYES! Forget boyfriend - let me MARRY this man! 😍🥰

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seonghwa-is-babie · 3 years

Text

What we've been missing (pt. 1)

Ateez x hybrid! Male reader

Part 1 of idk how many

Note: I have to split this up into multiple parts otherwise it would be hella long and take too long to make

You can find the whole thing with the tag 'what we've been missing' (once there's more parts)

"yunho! We're out of snacks again, can you go buy some?" the tallest looked up from his spot on the couch to the voice coming from the kitchen. He quickly got up and went to put on his coat, backpack and shoes, then grabbed his phone, wallet and house keys" I'll be back in a few!"

He quickly made his way to the grocery store, getting various snacks that all of them liked, paying for them and putting them in his bag. Trying to get back to the dorm as quickly as possible, as he knew how some of the members act without snacks

As he was walking back to the dorms, practically speed-walking to not get wet by the sudden rainfall, he heard a small sniff that stopped him in his tracks. He gazed to where the noise was coming from, a dark alleyway

He carefully walked into the alley, spotting a wooden crate, turned on its side so it could be used for shelter. In the crate, was a small boy, wrapped in a thin blanket, cat ears atop his head. 'it's a hybrid' yunho realised, he knew that even if they had some rights now, most of them still suffer from abuse and a lack of shelter

He crouched down before the crate, making the boy hide his head in the blanket "hey buddy, don't worry, I won't hurt you" his reassurances seemingly did nothing "are you hungry? I could give you some food" yunho tried again, taking his backpack and finding a suitable snack

The boy still hasn't moved, but was extremely tempted since he hasn't eaten in 2 days "here, you can have some of these cookies" yunho tried to offer the food, but the boy was still very hesitant, looking up at the man in front of him "it's alright, they're safe to eat, I promise"

eventually, the boy took the cookie taking a small bite to make sure that if it was poison, it wouldn't effect him too much. After feeling like it was safe, he practically devoured the thing "you must be really hungry" yunho handed him another cookie "so what's your name? how did you end up here?"

They boy froze up a bit, wondering if he should even tell a random human what happened. He did trust the man a lot more than past humans "y/n, my owners used beat me a lot, then one day, they went further and threw me out, this is my home now" Yunho frowned at that, he really despised how some people treat hybrids. To him, they are some of the most precious people on this earth and doesn't understand why others can't see it like that

"I'm sorry you had to go through that, no one deserves that" yunho noticed the rain getting heavier by the second "looks like we're getting a rainstorm tonight" he looked back at y/n, how would he ever survive this weather?

"how about you come with me? I have a home where you can stay warm and dry up, you don't have to stay long if you don't want to though" y/n weighed the options, go home with a seemingly trustworthy stranger or freezing out here?

He decided on the first option and slowly got up, not having the best balance, stumbling a bit "are you okay? Do you want me to carry you?" yunho went to help the male by grabbing his hands to keep his balence. Y/n slightly tensed up at the touches, but allowed them "I-I'll be fine"

Yunho glanced at the hybrid struggling to stay up "you don't look in the best condition to walk" he took his backpack and put it on his chest instead "you can get on my back" the young hybrid was a bit fascinated by how determined the man was to help him, he's never experienced something like this before

Carefully, he climbed on yunho's back, wrapping his arms loosely around his neck, and his legs around the man's waist "I'm not too heavy, am I..... ?" yunho giggled, realising he didn't tell the hybrid his name "yunho, and of course not, now, let's go home"

⏳

By the time yunho arrived at the dorms, y/n had fallen asleep. He unlocked the door, trying to not make too much noise so y/n could peacefully sleep. He was however, greeted with the usual loudness at the dorms

"finally you're back, what took so- what's on your back?" San asked confused as he saw yunho walk in with an unconscious boy on his back "I found him in the alley, he needs a place to sleep for tonight and some food. So if you guys could be quiet and let him sleep that'd be fantastic"

To say the other boys were confused as well seeing yunho come in with a hybrid on his back was an understatement "wha-" yunho quickly shushed mingi, unwinding y/n from his back and onto the couch, where y/n immediately balled up

"why do you have a hybrid with you?" wooyoung whisper yelled "I found him on my way back, he needs a place to sleep for tonight and some food, I don't think he's eaten in a few days"

"I'll go get seonghwa, we can make a meal for him" wooyoung got up and went to the older's room. "he looks so peaceful right now" Yunho mumbled to himself whilst smiling "so cute" San said, leaning against yunho's shoulder to get a better view of the hybrid

When wooyoung returned with seonghwa to cook something for y/n, Hongjoong came down as well, wanting to know what was going on. What he didn't really expect was yunho and San looking over the hybrid, while the other three observed them from the other end of the couch

"yunho" said male turned his head to his leader "the clothes he has look pretty torn up, should I give him some of mine?" he nodded, happy to know the other members are willing to help him as well

⏳

Y/n woke up to the smell of food, getting slightly shocked at all the new people. He clung to the only person he could trust, Yunho "hey, it's alright, they're my friends, they wouldn't hurt you" he hesitantly raised his head from yunho's chest to look up at the strangers. One by one they introduced themselves

"oh right, y/n, Hongjoong laid out some clothes for you in the bathroom, you should take a bath or shower first though" y/n nodded and let yunho lead him to the bathroom "can you wash yourself or do you need to help?" "I-I can do it myself, thank you" yunho nodded and left the bathroom

⏳

Once y/n washed up and put on the clothes Hongjoong had given him, which was a hoodie and some sweats. He quietly made his way back to the living room

The members currently seated on the couch turned at the sight of the smaller male returning, some of them San cooed at how cute he looked. Y/n got a bit nervous and went back to yunho's side "what's wrong?"

"don't like people staring" yunho hugged the male and he immediately snuggled into him "you know you still have to eat, right?" y/n nodded

"yunho, the foods ready" seonghwa said as he came into the living room, his eyes lighting up and smile growing when he spotted the hybrid and how cute he looked cuddled up to yunho "hi y/n, I'm seonghwa, I'm the oldest here. We made some food for you, do you wanna come and eat it?" seonghwa asked gently as he sat down near y/n "c-can yunho come too?" seonghwa nodded "off course, now let's go, you must be hungry"

Y/n followed seonghwa with yunho in tow to the kitchen, where wooyoung was already setting the food on the table. When he noticed the three enter the kitchen, he smiled at them, more specifically, y/n. "hey y/n, I'm wooyoung. Me and seonghwa made some food for you, hope you enjoy"

⏳

After the food, they all went back to the couch, y/n snuggling back up to yunho "he's really attached to you" mingi pointed out "I think it might be because he's had a rough past.... I think I'm the first person he actually trusts" a single tear slid down yunho's cheek

⏳

"y/n we have to go to bed, where do you wanna sleep?" yunho asked the hybrid "um, I think the couch is just fine for me"

"are you sure? I can always let you sleep on my bed if that's more comfortable" y/n shook his head "no thanks, I uhhh wouldn't want to bother you more then I have to"

"y/n you're not bothering us, but if you wanna sleep on the couch that's fine, we'll get you a blanket then" as if on cue, Yeosang walked in with a soft fluffy blanket "oh, thanks Yeosang" yunho smiled as Yeosang handed the blanket to y/n

⏳

Y/n tried to sleep, he did his absolute best to, but nothing could stop the nightmares from the past. It even got so bad he unconsciously shifted to his cat form. He needed something, someone there to comfort him, he had no choice but to wake one of the people in the house for comfort

Still in his cat form, he hopped of the couch and into the hallway. Now, y/n's initial plan was to just go to yunho's room, but he has no idea which room it was, they were all closed, so he couldn't see inside to check if yunho was in there

Deciding any of the members would be better than going back to have more nightmares, he started scratching on a random door, hoping someone would open it.

The door eventually opened after a few moments, a black haired man peeking through who y/n didn't seem to recognise at first, nonetheless he still slipped into the room

Upon further inspection, he noticed it was San that opened the door for him "y/n? Is that you?" y/n nodded "what's wrong, I thought you were sleeping on the couch?" y/n didn't make anymore sounds, jumping on San's bed, waiting for the latter to join

His gaze softens as he realised y/n probably didn't have the best sleep "didn't want to sleep alone?" he crawled back in bed as y/n laid down on his chest. San carefully reached out his hand towards y/n, quietly asking for permission to pet him

Y/n responded by putting his head in San's palm, giving him permission to continue. San did so very gently "it's okay y/n, I don't know exactly what you went through, but I want you to know we're nothing like the people who mistreated you" the hybrid started purring, eventually falling asleep "good night y/n"

#ateez #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez x male reader #kpop #kpop x male reader #park seonghwa #kim hongjoong #jeong yunho #kang yeosang #choi san #song mingi #jung wooyoung #choi jongho #what we've been missing #ateez hybrid au #hybrid #hybrid au

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unpaidoscorpintern · 3 years

Text

I'll tell you my sins (you can sharpen your knife)

pairing: Harry Osborn (Kindred)/Mary Jane Watson; a hint of Harry Osborn (Kindred)/Peter Parker (Spider-man)

rating: 18+

words: 2400

content warning: exhibitionism, voyeurism, creepy crawlies acting like tentacles for a hot minute, teratophilia since Kindred is a demonic entity

summary: Kindred serves Spider-man his just desserts; or, a p0rn parody of The Amazing Spider-Man #55

disclaimer: The following story was written before the publication of The Amazing Spider-Man #73

Memories are for photo albums. They're impressions on the back of our retinas, polaroids developed in the darkest corners of our minds. Turn on the light and they're forever tainted, a splash of color and a smudge of sentiment. You can't trust memories. Scars, on the other hand? Scars never lie.

I've collected more than a few in my time. That’s why my knees never really looked the same after my first bike ride. Dad was there until he wasn't. You see, he thought that letting go of the bike, letting go of his own son, would break me at first, then thicken my skin. But skin never heals back quite the same way, does it, Pete?

"Did you meet any famous dead people in that hellhole you crawled out of, Har? You know, like Dr. Freud?"

"Easy, Tiger." I can hear Mary Jane hissing beside me, towards you, across the table, through cobweb and candlelight. "Play nice."

"I'm done playing, MJ," you spit, through bloody teeth and dried tears. "There's pieces of my brain still splattered on that far wall over there from our earlier game. I'm done playing his fucking games."

Games? There's no playing at the dinner table, kids. Now, where was I?

"You were just about to let her go." You speak up again, desperation drowning out your ire. "Let them all go. It's me you have unfinished business with, or whatever the dead want outta the living."

Jealous, Pete? I must say, it’s a good look for you. But don't you worry, ol' buddy. I'm not done with you yet. Though Mary Jane and I do have something - what did you call it again? Ah, yes. Unfinished business. I'll get back to you as soon as I-

Is that...is that laughter I hear? Hallow and heaving, it still bounces off these old mausoleum walls, echoing in my ears and scrapping at an old scab. An old scar. What's so funny, huh? You mind sharing with the rest of the table?

"You, ol' buddy. I mean, I shouldn't be surprised since you're one of the only people who made me laugh when I wanted nothing more than to slit my own throat, but, still. Is this about what happened back at ESU? Is this about MJ breaking up with you?"

It's about you, Pete. About the choices you made. Every single one - from coming between Mary Jane and me to hiding my father's issues from his son - were all the wrong ones. If you had chosen otherwise, if you had been any less selfish, Gwen - I can see a blond head bobbing, but I'm talking about my Gwen - well, she wouldn’t be-

"Fuck you, Harry!"

Ah, there it is! Anger looks even better on you, Pete!

"You think I haven't spent every day blaming myself for what happened that night? You think I don't go over my own choices over and over again, questioning every decision I ever made to figure out which domino fell first?"

Yet again, there's nothing that doesn't look good on you, Pete. Why don't you try some responsibility for a change?

"Responsibility? You want to talk about responsibility? You're the one who's dangling the life of the woman I love right in front of me-"

Mary Jane opens her mouth, her sweet breath a summer breeze through the still air. "Peter-"

You're boiling, spilling over. Tears and spit, blood and grime, and you still look good. I bet you could even make maggots look good.

"And you want to act like you're better than me? Look at yourself! You are your father's son! Daddy's little fucking monster-"

If I'm a monster, then it's because that's what you made me.

"Harry," Mary Jane jumps out of her seat, following your lead.

You had help, of course. My help. Every other itsy bitsy gets a hand, too. Well, a centipede. They all get to swing in the air one last time before they-

"Harry!"

Dinner's over, Pete. It's time for your just desserts.

"It's m-me you want, Har-"

When you're right, you're right. I want you to confess your sins.

"So let them-AH! Let them go."

Maybe a little knock on the head will jog your memory. How about another? Now? Confess. Confess your sin. The deadliest. Confess.

"Har-"

"He doesn't remember." Mary Jane, I can see your knees barely keeping themselves from bucking. Yet, here you are, standing between the ol' Pumpkin Eater and me. "Whatever it is that he did, whatever sin he has yet to confess to, he doesn't remember."

Oh, don't you worry your pretty little bottom lip! He will remember, if it's the last thing he'll do! I've got tens of legs to crawl all over him and an eternity to spare. Come the end of time, he will repent.

"How many times have you tried torturing a confession out of him? You should know that hurting him won't work."

What're you suggesting? I can hear the tamed tremor in your voice, the slight shudder running down your spine, the booming beating of your heart. Yet, here you are, approaching me, one steady step in front of the other.

"Hurting me, however-"

"MJ-"

Are you hearing this, Pete, or is the blood already leaking out of your ears?

"Hurting me, the woman he loves, that should do it, right?"

"MJ!"

I’ll take that as a yes. You heard everything, but do you understand what it means? Do you, Mary Jane, understand what this all means? Look at them! It’s hard, I know, but look at them! Look at what I’m doing to them! I’m squeezing the life out of them for now, but centipedes can sting, too. Did you know that? They’re venomous. I could fill them with poison, watch them trash about as it clogs their veins! Is this what you want for them? Is this what you want for yourself? I can see it in your eyes - your beautiful eyes - that you can’t stand the sight of them in pain. So, tell me, Mary Jane, what makes you think that I can stand the sight of you in pain?

“Then you haven’t forgotten-”

That night, on the bridge? Mary Jane, how could I forget?

“I was scared out of my mind, but you said something which calmed me down. Those same words gave me the strength to come here. You remember, don’t you, Harry? Harry, you said that you-”

I loved you, Mary Jane. I said that I loved you, that I’d never hurt you. How could you ask this of me? How could you ask me to take you in his place?

“Because you loved him, too. You loved Peter, and I’m willing to bet my life that you still do.”

It’s true, Pete. I loved you, but I got better. I saw you for who you were after closing my eyes for the last time. And I loved MJ, up until a breath ago. Up until she let out that little surprised gasp she let out. Relax, it’s just an earwig. Oh, but what’s that? Is that an earpiece? And was that Dad on the other line?

“Harry, listen-”

You listen, my dearest friend! I said nothing about you being allowed to bring a plus-one, and, even if I had, Norman Osborn is not welcome here! I won’t allow any party crashers and, just to make sure he won’t be sneaking past the guards, I’ll seal us all in!

“Oh, my God!”

There is no god here! With the only entrance having collapsed in on itself, there is no coming in. But there is no getting out either. Good news, Pete! I’ve decided to lay off you for a while! Take a breather, pal, while I take my time with-

“If you touch her, I swear to God-”

Didn’t you hear me the first time? Here, I’ll loosen up my grip on you, so blood can start rushing back to your ears! There we go! And, since you two insist on bringing up God, Mary Jane offered herself as a sacrificial lamb and I intend to take her up on that offer. Oh, where’s all that fire gone, MJ? Was that all just some bluff, an elaborate scheme, one of Dad’s convoluted plans? Come on, you said you couldn’t wait to play the martyr and we both know how good of an actress you are. Even with your knees knocking against each other, even with your fingers, fidgeting as they reach out to me, you’re still a star.

“You said that you loved me. That you’d never hurt me. So, please, Harry, don’t hurt Peter. It hurts me to see him like this.”

I do love you, and I won’t hurt you. But I don’t love him and made no such promises to him. You did make a promise to me as well, remember? If you recall my love, then you recall me hurting myself with it. And you said it yourself, Mary Jane: he loves you. So you’re going to keep your promise, and you’re going to hurt him. You chose him last time. So, this time, you’re going to choose-

“You.”

“If you fucking touch her-”

She’s the one touching me, ol’ buddy. Yes, her hands are hesitant as they clasp my coat, but she’s all over me. Oh, Mary Jane, is that the perfume I bought for you while we were dating? Did you get a whiff of it, Pete? You probably did! You probably smelt it on one of the shirts you borrowed from me. I shared everything with you, but you just had to have her, too, didn’t you?

“MJ, what are you doing? MJ?”

What are you doing, MJ? You’re driving him mad! Jealousy looks just as good on him as my Armani shirts! He’s thrashing as if poisoned by the pain of seeing us together. I think I’ll loosen up my hold so that he can lift his head and see what you’re doing to me. You’re struggling with the buttons, every last inch of you shivering, but there’s nothing waiting for you beneath. I’m nothing like I used to be. You, on the other hand, are just as beautiful as I remember. I’d rather see what you’re hiding underneath.

“What are you waiting for?” Are you seeing this? Pete, are you seeing this? She’s kissing me! It’s my maggot-infested, bandage-covered jaw - and she’s kissing it! Look at her, Pete! “Undress me.”

“No, no, no-”

If you feel a pair of legs, or ten, crawling up your own, it’s only because I’m holding you close. If you feel a chill run down your spine, it’s only because I’m squeezing you tight. And if you feel a chill running down your spine -well, that’s a multi-legged friend tearing down your dress.

“NO!”

Did you see that, Pete? That almost looked like a pleasant shiver running through her. She almost looked like she enjoyed the cold-blooded embrace. Do you like it, Mary Jane? Do you like it when I touch you like this? Well, I guess you always had a thing for creepy crawlers. I am sorry about the dress. Black looks good on you, but it looks better on this white mausoleum floor. Do you like it when I touch you like this, scraping at that sensitive spot at the back of your head with my crooked claws, wrapping myself around your thighs with tens and tens of little legs, around your middle, squeezing down on your hips?

“Yes.”

Did you hear that-

“MJ, why? Why? Why?”

Did you hear that, MJ?

“W-what?” The heat of your breath hit my senses, what was once my nose, and you smell like freshly brewed coffee. Oh, you taste like life, Mary Jane, and it is sweet. The sweat beading at your forehead - do you mind if I have a taste? And the ones that spilled over, on the side of your face? “Harry.” My tongue is cold, I know. My embrace, the crawlers caressing you across your chest, they’re just as cold. Holding you is like catching a sunbeam: warm and bright. “Harry, aren’t you going to k-kiss me?” I hope you are hearing all of this, Pete, because I see your eyes burning through me, and I feel your body tensing up. Her body is just as tense, nerves knotted tightly from all this teasing. Is there any wonder why she needs my tongue in her mouth right now? She needs something inside her.

“Stop!”

It’s working, Mary Jane! He’s gone half-insane! As for the other half - what do you say? I don’t taste all that bad, do I? If I do, then you are the best actress of your generation! Pete, get over here! Stop struggling against the centipedes or they will have no choice but to stick something inside you, too! And, trust me, this is not the pleasant kind of penetration! Now stand up! Open your eyes and look into hers. Do you see that? Do you see those blown-up pupils? She wants this, and, judging by what’s jutting out of your onesie down there, I say you’re enjoying this, too.

“STOP!”

Well, Mary Jane, it turns out that shame is the shade that suits our Peter the best! He can barely contain his blush - or his erection, but that’s a skintight suit right there - watching snip away your lingerie with my long, sharp claws so wantonly. Seeing you savor every stroke of my tongue across your gooseflesh, past your perked up nipples and the valley of your breasts, and your newfound fetish for feeling creepy crawlers’ caress. He’d rather keep his eyes closed than witnessing any of this. So, what do you think? Is he ready to confess yet?

“Confess? Confess to what? Being sick to my stomach? Feeling disgusted with myself?”

"Tiger," Mary Jane moaned while pawing at my patchy coat, pushing her chest forward into my face. "I never knew...I never knew you liked watching.”

“Goddamn it, MJ!”

The scar from back when you stabbed in the back is a scab I can't help but claw at. The look on your face though? The way your cheeks burn with shame and your eyes are blown in excitement? Well, that's the ointment I needed, Pete.

"Goddamn it, Harry!"

God isn't here, Pete. It's just me. Confess to me. Confess. Confess.

"Playtime's over, kids!"

Did you hear that? Did any of you hear that? Is that-

"Norman?"

"Osborn?"

"That’s right! Daddy's home!"

#harry osborn #kindred #spider-man #peter parker #mary jane watson #harry osborn x mary jane watson #but pete is still too pissed to join in #so I might end up writing another one of these just to get him to kiss harry #yes that is a hozier lyric

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lena-in-a-red-dress · 3 years

Note

Let's see about Jack...

Well, there are a few things to consider.

First, in Islam, the only men in your life that you're allowed to not cover up in front of are obviously your father and brothers, grandfathers, immediate uncles (so mom and dad's brothers) and if you have any brothers, uhh, by milk (if your mom and your aunt have you and your male cousin around the same time, the moms will swap the kids and breastfeed them for a while which then makes them siblings so then that cousin can see you without hijab, but not your sisters and his brothers can't see you without it)

That means any man that sharia says you must cover up around is allowed to marry you if you agree (yes, that means cousins too)

Because of that, people kinda end up marrying their cousins or marrying within their own family or their own tribes/clans. Prominent families do this a lot too so the family inheritance doesn't leave the family, or because they're "pure" and don't want to muddy the bloodline (they're racists essentially. It's deeply sad.) They could also blend families but as long as the other family is also of their stature and wealth and customs. Think of arranged/traditional marriages as mostly a business contract, that'll make it easier.

So technically Jack could propose. Whether or not they agree is another matter. (Are we assuming Jack's Arab in this too? Indian? British Indian as in canon?) It all goes back to how enlightened the Luthors are or how close minded. I have a friend that met a guy during some competition, and they're pretty good buddies; she made sure to introduce him to her family and her brothers (older and younger) and her dad and mom and the family knows him so he's more or less allowed to be friends with her because her parents are aware of it and him but it always stays a respectful friendship thing. I imagine if he were to propose, they might not accept though because they're Arab and he's got Iranian ancestry like me.

As for Sam- well. Are we also assuming that Sam's Arab in this? Is everyone from the ME? Then in that case, premarital pregnancies end up with dumping the baby somewhere and fleeing because otherwise, uh, wouldn't really end well for them. If Sam is just Sam as we know and love, then I imagine it's fine it's her life. There might be frowning because she's gonna corrupt (y)our daughter and they'll bring shame to your family what will the people say (depending on who's whispering in the Luthors' ears about it)

I'm loving this! These posts are all so long though so I'm gonna wait for you to tell me to stop lol

Okay, so if we’re casting folks... maybe Jack stays British Indian, and his family are wealthy and powerful in their own sphere of influence, which makes them useful to the Luthors, and wouldn’t make a marriage arrangement out of the question. Maybe Lena and Jack get engaged, to beard each other and get the parents out of their hair, but then just turn it into a very looooooong engagement as they each focus on their careers and businesses and “I just can’t be bothered to marry right now, mom!”, with the understanding that if they ever found someone that they actually want to marry, they’d cancel the engagement and deal with the parents when the time comes?

As for Sam, maybe she’s Middle Eastern descent but was adopted by an American white family, and so lost a lot of her heritage and culture. She had a child before marriage, and by the time she meets Lena, Ruby is like... six or seven. And lets say the Luthor family is relatively progressive, so like, they take Sam and Ruby into the fold and help raise Ruby in the culture and kind of teach Sam along the way? Would a “big family” trope stretch that far?

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estrxlar · 3 years

Text

The Ghost Of You

03 - Music Room 3007

Chapters songs:

*Dagger; Slowdive

On The Level; Mac Demarco

F song; Strawberry Guy

^^^ when including * in chapters next to a song, that means it is a song that will be performed in the chapter.

———

— Y.L. Perspective

"Sunshine girl is sleeping. She falls in dreams alone," sings Toruku in a calming tone into a microphone, along with the strumming of a guitar. "And me, I am her dagger. Too numb to feel her pain."

"The world is full of noise, yes. I hear it all the time. And me, I am your dagger. You know I am your wound." I join in, adding onto his

The words we sang were truly upsetting. About a boy, a lover, who is aware he's hurting the girl he loves. I couldn't compare any relationship I'd ever been through to those lyrics.

Although one had always caught my eye: "I didn't really lose you, I just lost it for a while." It was easy to automatically think of the boy I was duetting with when we covered this; for some time now, Toruku has had small feelings for me.

One of the things that repelled me from a relationship with him was the idea that it would end horribly, and that it would potentially ruin our relationship.

Not to mention how much drama that would cause for two other unproblematic teenagers who were only trying to make a living off of their talent: Hikishi and Giki.

But today wasn't about what would happen between the two of us— today was her day.

"I thought I heard your whisper, it happens all the time." And with that, the song is brought to an ending, followed by my gaze met with the blonde boy.

"That was, once again, better than before. But I feel as if it's missing something." He explains, as he removed the wooden instrument from his arm and leaned it against the bean bag he sat in.

Music room 3007 contained the following: I couple of bean bag seats, a coffee table, a vending machine, almost every instrument in existence in an extra storage room, tools used to record and analyze music, and posters + records we kept throughout the years.

Truth is, music room 3007 wasn't even really a part of the school anymore. Sure, it was still on maps and the district still paid the electricity, cable, and water bill. But barely any students or teachers paid much attention to it, for it was stuffed behind the gyms, which were two large buildings that would block out any view of the smaller one that stood behind it.

'I hope Sugawara won't have any problem with finding this place.' I think to myself, as I stand from the chair to turn the camera and microphone off.

We would set up different amps, microphones, and cameras when recording a cover of a song. This time, it was a basic acoustic from 1993, named 'Dagger' by Slowdive.

After turning it all off, I plop back onto the cushion. "I think we've don't this quite enough times already, 'Ruku. We should upload it already and get on to the second song. I mean, we've been here a whole hour trying to perfect 'Dagger'." I say, removing my uniform's blazer, and throwing it across the coffee table. Next came my tie, and I unhooked the first two small buttons of my white collared shirt. The music room got hot when so many electronics were in use.

"Maybe you're right. We should probably get onto another song." He replied, running his hands in the bridge of his nose and down his neck.

I quickly stand up from my chair and stand behind him, leaning onto his shoulders. "I think you're just tired. Are you sure you wouldn't wanna go home?"

Toruku runs a hand up my arm, patting my shoulder, then sighs heavily. I couldn't imagine how tired he must be after today. His thoughts must've been wearing him down. "Yes, I'm sure. Besides, I don't wanna leave you all alone."

"No need, Sugawara will help me get home, remember?" I ask him, followed by a moan of protest. It worried me that Sugawara and Toruku most likely wouldn't get along, especially since both seemed so compatible at first.

Both his hands leave mine and lay in his lap. "And what's with this Suga guy, Y/n? Is he your buddy?" His voice echoed through the band room, stabbing the back of my brain while I think for an answer that wouldn't sound suspicious. I would say no, but who knew what the future could hold.

"I dunno. But he means no harm! At least I think so.." Tired from squatting, I lift to stand on both feet properly. Toruku slides his hand away from my figure and brings it towards his face. It covers his mouth as he once again sighs. "You seem tired after today, Ruku. Is it because of Moku?"

Hopefully, I hadn't overstepped any boundaries with what I had said. Hopefully, I was remotely correct about why he looked so down. "Yeah, it is. I won't act as if it doesn't bother me because I know it bothers you too. Although it's been three years, I still feel very guilty for going on without her."

'At least he knows I'm here with him.' I thought, moving to the bean bag I had been in just a few moments ago. By her, I meant Torukus passed girlfriend, and my best friend: the reason I practically stopped living at the age of fifteen. Honestly, Toruku and I weren't even really that close. I knew her as her boyfriend and he knew me as her best friend. And as close as we were to her, we were never friends. Moku's death only brought us closer to each other, stirring up the beginning of a rock band.

"I know what you mean. I do. Thankfully, this birthday of hers went better than the last two, wouldn't you say?" I ask, leaning on my elbows that sat on my knees.

"Definitely. The previous ones all ended up in fights and long makeups. I guess we're just more laid back about it now," He explains, getting up from his seat, and browsing the instruments that were hung on the wall. His fingers wrap around his belt loops as he stands. "I feel bad for getting over her so quickly."

"I know exactly what you mean. Never forget that I'm right here next to you, Toruku. That we've gotten through this together instead of alone. Although I wish you had talked to me more when it had first happened, I was all alone!" I chuckle at the last part, even if it wasn't funny at all. "I think the life we made out of our relationship has turned out for the better. Look where we are now: moving to American in about a year to sign to a label. Wouldn't she be proud we've gotten so far?"

"Maybe you're right," Toruku says, leaning against the back wall. His hair danced over his eyes barely, as they stared right at me. "Maybe you should hit up Toru and Hajime, ask how they're doing. They went through this too, you know."

"Yeah, I know. I haven't because I'm afraid of what they'll say, or if they even say anything at all. They're both a part of a very different social class after all. If anything, I'll probably get a simple thumbs up on my message." My voice grows low, expressing my tiredness from this conversation already.

Toru and Hajime were two other people that used to be in my friend group with Moku throughout our childhood. Both were loud and expressive and played volleyball, but they were also very kind and friendly towards Moku, Toruku, and me. Once middle school had started, the five of us grew closer and closer by the second. We joined volleyball clubs, hung out at our houses practically every day, and grew popular throughout the years. But once Moku had passed, we all fell apart. She was what held us together after all.

Both Hajime and Toru decided to go to another high school, and Toruku and I went to another. After that, we hadn't heard a single word from them.

"It's worth a try, Y/n. We wouldn't want to seem inconsiderate." Toruku says as he pulls out a pack of cigarettes from his pockets, as well as a lighter. After lighting one, the smoke leaves his mouth slowly, as he continues. "I wish you would at least try to make amends between them. You were closer to them than I ever was."

"I'll try. Just not now."

———

After another hour of practice with Toruku, the two of us stood silent on our phones while we waited for Sugawara. Something told me that he had gotten lost. Either that, or he just forgot about me, which I wouldn't blame him for.

But right when I was about to tell Toruku that we should go home, a message from an unknown number had shown up on the top of my phone screen that alarmed me.

[Text Message: ###-###-####]

Hey, I can't find the music room. It's not on the school campus. Either that, or it's the most invisible classroom ever brought to this school.

[Reply to ###-###-####]

I'm assuming this is Sugawara? Sorry, I don't have your number saved. If otherwise, the wrong number.

After the second the message gave me a preview, I fully entered the screen. It had a profile picture, but not a contact name. Although, that was my very first-year-like of me to be irresponsible. [Sugawara] read the title after I'd edited it, and nothing more. Only a few brief messages that we had just sent to each other.

Sugawara

Hey, I can't find the music room. It's not on school campus. Either that, or it's the most invisible classroom ever brought to this school.

I'm assuming this is Sugawara? Sorry, I don't have your number saved. If otherwise, the wrong number.

Actually, right number! But seriously... I have no idea where the hell you are. Is it off-campus? I might just cry if I don't figure this out. I've been at it for a solid ten minutes.

Ten minutes?? Damn boy, you could've just asked to meet me in the cafeteria or something. Toruku and I have been waiting here for a while as well.

Sorry!!

No need to apologize.

- you have started sharing your location with {Sugawara}-

Thanks. See you in a bit.

After discussing where I was hanging, I decided to look more into this saved contact. 'Had I really been so close to him as to have discussions with him?' I think as I decide to read a few more messages above our most recent convo. They only consisted of homework answers, tutoring questions, and a few more comments about school festivals and such. A good ten invites to a volleyball game were stored in there as well. I hadn't realized how much he had meant to me just two years ago. Time flies, taking most of your memories with you.

A few more moments went by before a knock came upon the room's entrance door, as well as the voice of someone behind it. "Uhm— hello..? Is this the right room?"

"No, go away," Toruku replies in a deeper, scarier voice as he shuffled towards the door to reveal Sugawara standing there alone with a frightened expression.

Suga sighed, putting a hand over his chest while he smiled. "That gave me a heart attack." He says, fixing his eyes towards my sitting figure. "Ready to go?"

I nod, lifting from my seat and stretching out my arms while yawning loudly. "God, I'm tired," I mumble to myself, gathering my bag and the tie and jacket I had taken off, before slowly walking over towards Sugawara. "Isn't it after practice? Shouldn't you be all tired and worked out?"

"Oh, no. Today was only focused on the new players, which honestly didn't go so well." He explained, finishing with a soft chuckle. Though I could tell it was filled with disappointment, for the way he looked down on the floor was purely depressing.

But quickly steered the conversation another way to distract him from it; that was the least I could do. "Oh, well, today it was just Toruku and me. But thankfully we just recorded some extra vocals so we didn't have to record the rest of the teams' jobs."

Sugawara distracts himself, taking small glances around the room as I explain to him what we did. He observes the different colors and pictures on the walls, the furniture we helped ourselves to, and the instruments gathered onto the wall. "It looks quite comfortable in here. To be honest, I'm surprised that the school even lets you decorate this place all by yourselves."

"They didn't, they just don't know about it. It's quite convenient if you ask me.." I mumble, shuffling from one foot to the other. What I said was no lie, we were truly blessed to have had a room to ourselves here on campus. If it wasn't for the band teacher who had shown it to us, we probably would've spent our practice time in a garage where there's no AC or comfortable floors.

Meanwhile, Toruku explained to Sugawara the reasoning behind each decoration, I check the timing. It was 6:00 PM, just in time for my mother to get home from work.

"Should we get going?" I ask the grey-haired boy, as he's brought back to reality. He and Toruku sharply turn, pausing their supposedly intriguing conversation, as he nodded to my question.

"I guess so. Well, thank you for showing me this place, I never would've discovered it if it wasn't for you two." Sugawara states, bowing towards the blonde boy with a cigar.

"Alright, I'll catch you later, Y/n. And it was nice meeting you today, Sugawara." After I have a small hug to Toruku and said my goodbyes, Suga and I were out the door.

Our walk began with the two of us climbing down a few stairs, and jogging towards where the sidewalk actually began. From there on, it was easy getting towards the main part of campus, and walking home would be a piece of cake. For Sugawara, I mean.

"So, do you walk home every day?" I ask, tightening my hands around my bento box. The silence between us rested heavily on my chest; not a single word left his mouth.

But it may have been because he was stuck in his own little world, for soon after my question, he blinked his eyes a couple of times and cleared his throat. "Oh, no— not really. I only walk after practice when I stay late. But on free days, like in the morning, I ride the bus."

Nodding, I explain my way of getting to and from school as well. "Me too. Well, usually my mother would drive me before school even started. Either that or I would ride my skateboard and hide it in some gutter. You know how angry the school gets about skateboards." I laugh, hoping he'd approve of joking with school rules. But knowing Sugawara, he probably already knew I bend some.

"Ah, yes. That's convenient. But how far did you live before moving into [Neighborhood]? Surely not too far, right?" He questions, looking down at me for an honest answer.

I widen my eyes at this, making my answer to his questions obvious already. "Uhm.. no! Just a mile and a half away, not a big deal.." My head turns the other way while I giggle at Sugawara's shock. It wasn't a big deal for me at all, I didn't mind getting the few extra steps in the morning. As for him, he must have not had to walk that far every day to understand. I didn't blame him for being so surprised. It wasn't every day you find someone who voluntarily walks that far.

"Oh— that's.. that's a lot! I'm sorry that you had to do that. It must have been hell! But thankfully you have someone to join you on transportation, right?" Sugawara gives me side-eyes, as a smile appeared on his pale face.

"Yeah.. you're right." My sentence runs low in the cold, shaking as I shift from the sidewalk to the road. The pavement felt hard and slippery due to the transition from winter to spring, yet it was still freezing outside.

"You know... it was strange bumping into you today. To be honest, I feel like I'm fifteen again. I think that's just how you make others feel, you know?" My words come out abruptly, but I didn't mind. After today's long day all I wanted was one honest conversation.

Thankfully, Sugawara felt the same I did. "Spending time with each other must have brought back lots of memories, even if they were small." He says to me, observing the way my feet jumped from the curb to the street.

The feeling he brought was like a scent from years ago when you're a little kid. Whether you're reading by a window, or running through a meadow, you'd forgotten it ever even tickled your senses.

"It's kind of strange. Even if we weren't best friends, you still meant a lot to me. I'm wondering whether or not you're still the same, and if that could be brought back." I explain, drawing out my arms to make a tree-like pose while I played hopscotch with the roads. The keychains that hung on my badge made a 'clunk!' noise against the ID, meanwhile, I discussed. "We've both changed so much, Sugawara."

"You're right, we have. But for the better, you know? I think at the moment I'm mentally healthier than in the past year. And as for you, I think anyone can see that. I don't mean that your time of grief was a mistake, but I'm happy that you've been nicer to yourself."

"Yeah, me too." My words stutter, interrupted by the loud engine behind me. Sugawara and I quickly turn towards the noise, widening our eyes at how close the vehicle was. Suddenly, an ear-piercing honk is signaled from the driver, and I'm quickly pulled from in front of the car to under a streetlight in one's arms.

The action is hasty and happened in just a split second, but enough to save me from being run over. Barely comprehending what had just occurred, I freeze in place just like the slippery road. And as the car honks off, I'm left, once again, alone with Suga. Only this time, uncomfortably in his arms.

Lightning travels down my back once I realize I was being held by a stronger, warmer body. Both my arms were being tightly held by his, and my body barely being separated from his by an inch. I stared right into his eyes, as he did so as well.

"Y/n, you. you've got to be careful. Be careful."

Sugawara's words ring in my ears, as I rapidly blink to regain consciousness. Immediately after, a scatter to search for my school bag, which was thrown only a few feet away from me. After retrieving it, I quickly stand onto my feet and turn to Suga, who's already prepared to continue our walk.

"I'll be careful."

With that, the two of us continue our journey towards home in silence once more.

I've gotta be careful with Sugawara.

——

Thanks for coming back to read :) I know my story is crappy but I've only been writing for a little so you could understand why. Please please vote for my chapters, thank you.

- star

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r3b3lgrrrrrrrl · 5 years

Text

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 46)

"A Bullet with Butterfly Wings"

@lovemythsworld

@creatureofthen1ght-v3

Slightly Day Drunk, Colson and Luna burst into their hotel room kissing and laughing. "I can't believe he did that!!" Luna manages to get out between giggly kisses.

"He's a fucking Sicko!!" Colson laughs, carefully pulling her tiny green bikini top off of her. They're talking about Mod proposing to an old lady in the casino just a few minutes before.

"If he legit brings her to dinner, I don't know if I'll be able to keep it together." She says, the last word being caught in a moan.

Colson has made his way from her mouth, to her neck. Nipping the scorpion as he kisses down her stomach. She runs her hands through his hair as he pulls her bikini bottoms down with his teeth. Stopping to look up at her, each time he licks and kisses the bare skin of her thighs. He pulls her bottoms all the way off.

As she goes to step out of them, he places his hands firmly on both pedicured feet. Planting her in place. "FUUUCK, Colson...." She moans as he licks around the inside of her left ankle. Slowly drawing his tongue up her inner calf, over her knee cap before licking the inside of her left thigh to her bare pussy.

Throwing her left leg over his shoulder, as she still stands, he dives his face into her sopping cunt.

"I Fucking love the taste of her pussy. Sweet ass peach." Colson thinks gripping Luna's ass as his tongue hits every note of her pussy.

She cries out for him again as he licks her juicy folds, tickling her clit with his tongue.

Pulling on his hair to steady herself, she closes her eyes and rides his sweet face until she cums in his mouth. Dropping her leg, he looks at her, pleased with his work. As he lifts his body up, she wipes her cum off his chin with her thumb before sucking it off as he watches.

"You're so fucking Dirty!" He tells her, dick bulging, before he kisses her passionately. His mouth is all over her neck again, he runs his hand over her smooth ass. ❗SLAP❗

"Weeeeak....." She teases him with a sly smile.

"I'll show you weak. Bend the fuck over." He directs her. Doing as she's told, she bends over the edge of the bed, wiggling her ass in the air for him. Looking over her shoulder, she watches as he licks the palm of his hand. She braces herself for him. ❗SLAP❗SLAP❗SLAP❗SLAP❗

She moans in pleasure to his delight as he spanks her. Hard. ❗SLAP❗She yelps this time, pulling back.

"You caught my puss, Bunny!!!" She whines.

"I know, I felt it. I'm sorry." He pulls her back towards him. "Come're." He tells her as he bends down, pulling her ass up to lick and kiss her swollen pussy. His touch and sweetness erase any unpleasant pain.

He kisses both her ass cheeks. Biting the tattoo on the right one. Still bent over her, his tongue follows up her spine to her neck.

"HOLY FUCKING CHRIST!!" Luna screams out as he bites the back of it while sliding his huge cock inside of her. "UNHHH!!" She continues to moan loudly as he grabs her tits, fucking her from behind with deep, long strokes.

Her moans excite him as he picks up the pace. "Fuck me, Bunny." She begs as he pushes deeper into her "FUCK ME HARD."

"Like the dirty little whore you are?" He taunts her. Lifting her by the throat, putting his other hand on her hip to keep their rapid pace. Fucking each other rough, how the both like it. As she feels him about to release inside of her, she dips her chin down, pulling his index finger from around her throat and into her mouth with her tongue. Sucking on his finger and bucking against him hard, she makes them both cum easily.

"FUCKKKKKK." He exhales, running his wet finger down her bottom lip to her tits, holding her close. They're both standing, breathing hard as he pulls her chin up to look at him. "I love you, Addie." He laughs kissing her on the forehead.

Smirking and rolling her eyes, she tells him to shut up as she playfully shoves him off of her.

Tossing herself across the bed, she lights up a joint as she watches him move around the room. Dick swinging.

"MOTHERFUCKING B.D.EEEEE!!!!!" Luna smiles to herself, beyond sexually satisfied. Her mind pops to Bleta, the lyrics to Brooklyn Bitch play on repeat inside her head 🎶If you weren't mine, I'd be jealous of your love🎶If you weren't mine, I'd be jealous of your love🎶 "I really...."

"Shower?" Colson breaks her thoughts with his gorgeous grin.

"Yup!!" She replies, passing him the joint as she follows him into the bathroom.

--------------------------------------------------

Getting dressed for dinner, Luna has on a tight black dress with side cut outs and knee high boots. Colson's dick gets hard when he sees her pull the legendary cheetah print coat out of her bag.

"You're going to wear that tonight? He asks excitedly. Blue eyes dancing.

"Mhm." She responds with a smile as they head to meet everyone else in the lobby.

Arm carefully around her shoulders, waiting for the elevator, he ducks down close to her. "In case I didn't tell you yet, you look wonderful tonight, Kitten." He murmurs in her ear. The doors open as she pulls him into the empty elevator for a 27 floor make out session.

-------------------------------------------------

Dinner at Joël Robuchon's Le Monde is beyond amazing. Conversation is light and fun. Alcohol flowing as usual. Mod being slightly disappointed to not be reunited with his new found love.

"I can't believe she came by and I was sleeping!" Rook complains about missing Stephanie at the pool. "You shoulda woke me up." He says to Luna with a bit of an attitude.

Giving him an apologetic look, she tells him she's sorry. "But hey!" She continues "Would you have rather met her, just waking up, discombobulated as hell. Or awake and on point, like you are now?" She tries to persuade him.

Giving Luna a huff, Rook agrees she's right.

"She pulled that one out of her fucking ass." Colson smiles, amused by his girlfriend's power of persuasion.

"Christopher!!" Bella says, greeting the older gentleman approaching their table. She stands as he greets her with a kiss. "How are you?" She asks.

He responds with a "Great!". Chatting with her, he looks around the table spotting Luna. "Stephanie said you girls were in town!! How good to see you both!" He walks over to kiss Luna's cheek.

Seeing Colson's jaw clench at another man touching her, she introduces them. "Christopher, this is my boyfriend Colson and our friends, Slim, Rook and Mod. Guys, this is Christophe de Lellis. He's the Executive Chef here at Le Monde."

The guys say hello, complimenting their meals.

"OH, FUCK!" Luna says standing up. "I don't know what I was thinking!! Congratulations on the third Michelin, Buddy!!" She pulls a laughing Christopher in for a hug and congratulatory pat on the back. "I'm sure Joël is ecstatic, Eh?"

Christopher nods his head proudly.

She turns to Colson. "Christopher and his partner Joël are family friends. They know my Mom-mom from back in the day, when they were just poor, little, pizza boys." Luna teases Christopher. "And now they have, this one, 2 at home in NY and, what 6 or 7 others through out the world, I believe."

"The American dream." Christopher says displaying his hands out, beaming. After sending his love to Patti, kissing the girls goodbye and thanking the guys for their company, Christopher heads back to the kitchen.

"I can't take you anywhere, can I?" Colson laughs asking Luna as she sits back down.

"Nah. Not really." She tells him with a smile and a kiss. They finish dinner before heading to The Park to experience Enigma.

--------------------------------------------------

Backstage is insane as with any of Stephanie's shows. Between the crew, props and costume changes it's always looked like a different universe to Luna.

"SMIIIITH!!!!" Stephanie shouts for Luna, running up to her in only fishnets, panties a bra and a wig cap. "UGH!!! I'm so excited you're here!!" She exclaims, slipping a bullet into Luna's hand. "One shot. It's from The Netherlands." She tells Luna with a sneaky smile before throwing an "I love you!! ENJOY!!!" over her shoulder as she runs off.

-------------------------------------------------

Luna goes to find her seat and Colson. Stephanie had hooked them up. They're in VIP, just behind the pit.

"These are great seats!!" Bella shouts.

"Steph said this shit was too." Luna responds opening her hand. "It's pure as fuck. She said just take one shot." Luna warns her. Bella nods in understanding as she lifts it to her nose. She passes it back to Luna who hits it herself.

Luna nudges Colson, who's talking to Slim. She shows him the bullet. "Hit it once and pass it. Let them know ONLY once tho."

He takes it from her, asking her where she got it.

"Steph." She responds. "She said it's from The Netherlands, so it's not cut like we're used to. Let the boys know that." She tells him with a concerned look in her eye. Colson takes her seriously, trusting that Luna knows her drugs. After Colson bumps it himself, he passes it with the strict warning. Once everyone has hit it, he passes it back to Luna. As she slides it into her purse, he reassures her no one did too much. Just then, the lights drop and the show begins.

-------------------------------------------------

Of all the artists Luna knows both personally and otherwise, Stephanie has always been her favorite performer, even back when she was playing little clubs in The West Village. She's only gotten more amazing and creative in time.

The amphitheater is booming with electronica, raging guitars, thumping drums, a heart wrenching piano and wild fans. The imagery is mind blowing. MDMA only amplifying the feelings of the thriving colors and sounds as Just Dance rips through the air.

Bella and Luna dance, sing, hold hands and even cry while going ABSOLUTELY bonkers during the show. Rook and Mod move over to them. Both dancing and singing along to Luna's surprise. Colson and Slim are locked into Stephanie's stage performance. Sitting. Not moving. Only staring. Very intently.

Looking over to check on Colson, Luna sees her boyfriend stuck. Reaching in her purse, she pulls out 2 joints. Sitting down next to Colson, she hands him a lit one and a bottle of water. His big eyes and wide smile thanking her. Moving down, she sits next to Slim, handing him the same items. He's able to utter the words "Yooooooo...." with a grateful look.

About 20 mins later, they're both up. Moving, laughing and taking in the atmosphere with the others.

"SHE'S FUCKING SIIIIICK!!!!" Colson shouts at Luna as he scoops her up for a passionate kiss. The vibration of the room and drugs pulsing through them.

Stephanie sings live, dances her heart out and flies through the air. Enigma is not a concert. It is not a show. It is an experience like no other. Stephanie explaining to Luna her concept a long time ago. Enigma being a spirit guide and manifestation of Stephanie's inner most psyche, guiding her to a greater truth about herself over the course of almost 2hrs.

Luna stares at her friend in amazement. The same way she did all those years ago, at the first show of Stephanie's that she had ever caught.

"She fucking did IT!" Luna's heart glows with pride for her friend. Never doubting she could.

--------------------------------------------------

Rolling their faces off, after the show they're headed back stage. Colson points at a drum kit, teasing Rook about his love of Gaga.

"Look at THAT fucking smile." Luna thinks snapping a quick picture of Colson.

Things are much calmer in the dressing room. Stephanie is sipping a glass of champagne, smoking a joint when they all come in. "Hello!" She says standing to greet them. "Thank you so much for coming. Did you enjoy?" The 6 of them erupt into giggles. "So, you did." She laughs, tilting her head with a knowing smile.

"It was fucking off the wall, Steph!!" Luna exclaims hugging her friend. "You nailed it. It's so much greater than we ever IMAGINED it could be!!" She kisses her friend hard on the lips.

Stephanie kisses her back. "God, I love you, Doll." She tells Luna, thinking back to that tiny apartment and a simple concept. "What are you guys doing tonight?" She asks.

Luna looks around at her tripping, giggling friends. "We were gonna play some poker, but I think we're probably gonna hit The Strip and watch the colors. Wanna come?" She asks.

"ABSOLUTELY!!" Stephanie declares.

"Awesome!!" Luna grins, hearing Bella shout with her in unison. She's close enough for Luna to reach out and squeeze her hand. Grateful for their connection.

Luna then turns to look for Rook. Finding him, she pulls him over. "Steph this is Rook, Rook, Steph. She's gonna hit the strip with us." She tells his happy eyes with a smile.

"It's an honor to meet you!!" He beams brightly, taking her hand, making Stephanie blush.

"Let me change and I'll meet you by the stage." She tells them. Luna hands her back the bullet, which Stephanie promptly hits and passes around to them all again.

It's deff gonna be a colorful night.

--------------------------------------------------

Out on The Strip, they are their normal, wild, fucked up selves. Just tripping balls on a Monday night in Las Vegas. The boys are running up and down the sidewalks. Slapping signs, jumping all over each other. The girls skip together, linking arms and giggling. Everyone is pointing at something in amazement. Colson swings Luna around, continuously kissing and laughing together. She makes him sad when she declines his piggy back ride because her dress is too short. Making it up to him with more sweet kisses and I love-LOVE yous. They're loud and rambunctious. Happy and having fun. Roaming in and out of the casinos. One always catching the other before they cause too much ruckus. Although, Colson does channel his inner Tommy at The Fremont. Smacking up a tray of drinks, while screaming "WHOOOOOOOOH!!" in the waitress's face. Instantly grabbing Luna's hand and running for the door. The other 5 hauling ass behind them. Hysterically laughing as they all safely make their get-a-way. The mini Eiffel Tower catches them, while they all stand and stare at the lights. Holding hands in a row, feeling a deep, spiritual connection. Later, Mod tries but fails to throw Bella in the Bellagio fountain. Rook and Stephanie hit it off right away. Her appreciating his love of her art and respecting his craft. At some point Colson pulls on Luna's cheetah print coat. He looks great in it and keeps trying to share its softness on everyone. As they wander around Vegas, Luna gets a great shot of him distracted, laughing at some strangers, standing with a posed Mod and Slim. Rook, Bella and Stephanie deep in philosophical talks behind her. Pounding water, puffing on pens, the group spends the rest of the night wandering and laughing. Stephanie enjoying the rarity of blending in.

--------------------------------------------------

It's late-late when Colson and Luna make it back to their hotel room. Everyone had popped a bar before splitting up to ease the buzz in their heads. Slipping off her dress, she climbs into the soft bed as he heads into the bathroom. She's knocked out by time he comes back in. Taking off his clothes, he slides into bed with her. She moves enough for him to slide his arm under her, cradling her on his chest.

"God, I fucking love her. Mmmm..... She smells so fucking good... I'd spend the rest of my life right here if I could." He thinks kissing her forehead.

Wanting the world to know how he feels, especially Bleta, he grabs his phone. Staring into the camera he takes a selfie and posts it to his Instagram. He captions it....

Trust and believe. This is how I start every day and will always end each night. With MY girl

🐰💖🐱 💯 #loveLOVEyou #Vegasbaby #mybadlittlething

With that he sets his phone down, snuggles into Luna and happily falls asleep.

-------------------------------------------------

To be continued.....

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writerfae · 4 years

Text

@thegirlwithnonickname here are chapter two and three of Always by your side!

I still remember how I wrote chapter three... sitting in my bed listening to "Grow Old With Me" by Michael Schulte on repeat and crying xD I can really recommend that song, it fits the story and especially chapter three very well!

Chapter 2

Tyler lay down and took his phone from the bedside table. He dialed Lucas number. Even though it was already pretty late he answered immediately. As usual.

'Hey.'

Tyler closed his eyes. 'Hello Lucas.'

For a moment there was silence. But than Lucas started to talk again.

'They're fighting again, am I right?'

Tyler nodded. He could hear them downstairs.

'Yes', he whispered. Lucas sighed.

'What's the reason this time?'

Tyler clutched to his phone.

'I don't think they need a reason anymore. Especially dad.'

'Damn. Do you want me to come over?'

Tyler shook his head.

'Don't be silly, it's the middle of the night.'

"So what? I can sneak out.'

Tyler wouldn't doubt that. It wouldn't be the first time.

'You don't have to come over.'

'Sure?'

'Yes.'

'Okay, when you think so... Hey, have you heard...'

He started talking about some story he heard in school or on the internet or somewhere else.

He didn't care if the story was true or not. He was just talking.

And Tyler didn't care either, as long as he heard Lucas voice.

It was calm and familiar. That always calmed Tyler down.

After some time Lucas stopped and asked: 'Is everything alright now?'

Tyler took a deep breath. "Yeah everything's alright.'

'Good. Good night Ty.'

'Good night Lucas.'

That's how it went everytime. When Tyler's parents were fighting late at night Tyler called Lucas. Then they talked until Tyler could forget about his fighting parents.

No matter to what hour, Lucas was always there. Tyler would often flee to Lucas and his family when the situation at home was too much for him to take.

And especially when he was a young boy his mom used to send him over to Lucas home when she knew that her husband would start a fight again. She didn't wanted her son to see that. And she knew that Tyler was in good hands when he was with Lucas family.

He was always welcomed there.

~~~

As Tyler walked down the stairs he could hear his mother talking to someone. His father was at work, so that probably meant she had a guest.

Tyler hesitated. He didn't really feel like having company right now.

But suddenly he recognized the second voice - it was Lucas mother.

Tyler walked down a few steps so he could hear the two women talking.

He sat down at one of the stairs so they wouldn't see him and started to listen.

'... really strong, you and your husband.'

'We... we try our best. It's hard. But we try.'

Lucas mom sounded like she had cried. It reminded Tyler of her call on the day Lucas had died.

Just thinking about that made him wanna go back to his room.

'Say, how is Tyler doing?'

Tyler froze as he heard his name.

'He's not feeling good. The boy hasn't really left his room since Lucas funeral. Sometimes I hear him cry, late at night... It's really hard for him.'

'The poor boy. It would've break Lucas heart. Tyler was his best friend.'

'And Lucas was Tyler's best friend.'

Tyler stood up and walked down the rest of the steps.

'And he'll always be my best friend', he said.

The two women looked at him in surprise.

'Tyler', they both said.

Lucas mom stood up, walked towards him and hugged him.

"It's nice to see you Tyler.' She smiled. It was a sad smile.

'Sit down darling', his mother said.

Tyler took a seat and Lucas mom sat down as well.

Tyler's mother brought them a cup of tea.

'I'll leave you alone.' Then she left the room.

Lucas mother took a sip of her coffee. Then she looked at Tyler.

'I'm here because I wanted to thank you. For your speech. I didn't had the chance to do it at the... at Lucas funeral.'

Tyler could remember his speech. He had to stop halfways because he started to cry. In front of the whole community.

'Lucas deserved a way better speech.'

'Don't say that Tyler. It was beautiful. Lucas would've liked it.'

Tyler wasn't sure about that.

'I should've finished it.'

He was still angry about it. Lucas would've ended the speech. He was strong. Tyler wasn't.

Lucas mother shook her head. 'What's important is what you said, not whether you finished it or not. It was really important for us. That's why I want to thank you.'

'You don't have to. He was my best friend. It was the least I could do.'

Lucas mom smiled. 'Yeah... My little boy... he always wanted siblings, did you know that? He used to ask me when he'll finally get a little brother.'

The memory made her laugh. It sounded a bit like Lucas laugh. Tyler missed it...

'He always wanted someone he could play with. Someone he could protect. He never stopped to ask me. That's it, until he met you. Since he befriended you he never asked again. I think... he had you and that was all he needed.'

She took Tyler's hand. 'He really loved you. You were like a brother to him. You know, I'm really glad that you and Lucas found each other.'

'I am glad too. Really. I...' He stopped.

There was so much he wanted to tell her. He wanted to say how important Lucas was to him. How thankful Tyler was for everything he had done for him. That he changed his life. That he showed him what friendship meant. And he wanted to tell her how much he missed Lucas.

But as Tyler looked at Lucas mom he suddenly realized there's no need to say all this out loud. She knew.

She let go of his hand and stood up.

'I have to go now. My husband is waiting for me. Thanks for your time.'

She smiled at Tyler's mom, who just came back into the room.

'I'll bring you to the door', his mom said.

'Okay. Goodbye Tyler.'

Tyler stood up and said goodbye as well.

'Wait, I almost forgot. There's something I wanted to give you.'

She searched her purse for a small object and gave it to him. As he looked at it he knew what it was. He couldn't believe his eyes.

'That's... that's...'

'Lucas bracelet.' Lucas mother nodded.

'I can't accept this...'

The little item in his hand was really the leathern bracelet Lucas used to wear. He already owned it when Tyler met him. Lucas loved the bracelet.

It was a gift from his late grandfather. It was something special to him. And a huge keepsake.

'Yes, you can. Lucas would've wanted you to have it. I know you'll take good care of it.'

She closed his hand around the bracelet and hugged him again. Then she left.

Tyler stood alone in the kitchen. He opened his hand and looked at the bracelet.

It felt like a piece of Lucas came back to him.

And he swore he would never let it go.

Chapter 3

'Come on, Tyler. Get out of there', his mom called.

But ten years old Tyler refused to leave his hideout. He was lying in his bed, the blanket raised over his head. He knew it was childish. He didn't care.

'I don't want to.'

Today was the first day at the new school and Tyler didn't want to go. He was scared. Because a new school meant new people and a lot of changes. He hated changes.

'But you have to. Otherwise you'll be late for school.'

Tyler ignored his mom's words. But suddenly a second voice caught his attention.

'Yeah she's right! We'll be late!'

Tyler recognized it immediately.

'Lucas?'

The other boy made his way to Tyler's bed and lifted the blanket a bit to get a look at his friend.

'Yeah it's me. I've been waiting for you, buddy. It's our big day today! Why are you hiding?'

No answer. Lucas sighed.

'Let me guess. It's about school isn't it? I promise you, it will be fun! You don't need to worry.'

'But... I am worried, Lucas. All the new teachers and classmates...'

Lucas was an optimist. Where Tyler only thought about the negative things, Lucas saw what was good. And he tried to let Tyler see it too.

'... won't harm you. Come on Ty, we can't stay in elementary school forever. Sure, there are new people. Some things may change, but that's not a bad thing. Just think about all the new things we'll learn!'

That was one of the reasons Tyler was glad to have him as a friend.

'Besides, you're not alone there! We're in the same class, remember? I'm with you. That won't change. We'll get through it together. We're partners, right?'

Tyler peered from under his blanket to look at Lucas, who was smiling at him. And he returned the smile, because he knew that Lucas was right after all.

No matter what might happen. No matter what might change. He wasn't alone. His friend was there. They were a team.

'Then let's go, partner!' Tyler, now a little less scared, finally got out of his hideout.

'That's what I wanted to hear.', Lucas said.

Tyler's mom once said that one of the most beautiful things about Lucas and Tyler's friendship was how they were always there for each other and how they complemented the other perfectly.

Lucas had enough joy living inside of him to lift Tyler up when he was feeling down and Tyler's steady personality calmed Lucas down when he overextended himself.

~~~

As Tyler went into the school building, he almost felt like back when he had his first day at this school. Everything seemed strange and exclusive. The many students, the colorless walls and the noise.

But this time he was alone. Lucas wasn't there to make him feel safe.

Tyler had begged his parents to let him stay at home for another few days. But they said no, so he had to go.

He felt completely overstrained. He spent the last few days alone without talking to someone besides his parents and Lucas mom.

Now that he was surrounded by people again, he was lost.

It wasn't just that he was alone, everyone was starring at him too. Everyone knew about Lucas. And everyone knew that Tyler was his best friend.

So everyone was looking at the guy who just lost his only real friend.

It must've been a strange sight. Tyler had the hood of his hoddie pulled down low to cover up his insomnia and grief marked face and to block everyone out.

But the strangest thing was to see him without Lucas.

Even in school there had always been Lucas and Tyler, Tyler and Lucas. Everyone knew that. The people were used to see the two of them together all the time.

Tyler without Lucas however... That wasn't normal.

And for Tyler it was a nightmare.

He struggled to get through the lessons. He never said a word. All he did was sitting in his classes, lost in thought, playing with Lucas bracelet around his wrist and starring at the blackboard. He couldn't recognize a single word that was said during the lessons.

He couldn't focus. Tyler just wanted to escape.

He could do without the trivial lessons and the pitiful glances of teachers and students.

~~~

'Tyler! Hey! Wait! Tyler!'

Tyler kept walking. All he wanted to do is survive the break and the lessons afterwards so he can go home again. Was it that much to ask for?

'Come on, wait! Hey!'

Someone grabbed his arm. Tyler stopped and turned around. It was Maya.

'What do you want?'

Maya was one of the people Lucas and Tyler spent their breaks with.

It was a small group of people that started to gather around the two boys in the past few years.

Slightly shocked by the rough sound of Tyler's voice Maya let go of his arm.

'I-I just wanted to ask you where you're going. Surely our friends are already waiting. We normally meet every break, remember?'

Actually Maya and the others were Lucas friends, not his. Because everyone loved Lucas. And they accepted Tyler, but he was never a real part of their group. Or at least it never felt like it. He never felt really close to any of them.

'Well, go and meet your friends then. I prefer being alone.'

'But why don't you wanna come with us? I'm sure it would be good for you to have some company. Lucas would've wanted...'

'Don't you tell me what Lucas would have wanted!', Tyler cut her off.

Maya flinched.

'Tyler...'

But Tyler wasn't listening.

'No! I can't sit there with you as if everything is alright. Because it's not! Maybe you can do it, laughing and talking like you always do. But I can't. Not when Lucas is gone and you all are acting as if everything is like it used to be. Nothing is like it used to be anymore."

Tyler didn't noticed that he overacted. He was just full of anger and frustration. It was all too much for him. And he wasn't able to control himself, not yet.

'That's not true Tyler, and you know it! Of course nothing is like it used to be. Lucas is dead and that's horrible! And we all miss him so much. You might not think that, but we do! Just because we still meet up doesn't mean we forgot about him or that he wasn't important to us. In contrary! Because he was. And he'll always be. But life has to go on Tyler. Please, I just mean well.'

Maya sighed.

'Listen, I know you two were pretty close to each other. You knew him longer than any of us. And I know how you feel. But what you just said about us isn't fair.'

'Leave me alone!', Tyler shouted. 'You know nothing!'

'He was my friend too. Our friend. You're not the only one who lost him.'

'Not the only one, huh? Not the only one! But he was my only friend, understand? The only one I ever had. My best friend! For nine years! Nine damn years.

You haven't spent nearly every day with him since you were eight years old. He never visited you as you broke your leg because you fell from a tree while climbing or tried to comfort you because your parents were fighting again.

He was always there. And now he's gone and I'm alone! I'm alone...'

His last words were just a whisper. Tyler felt how tears started streaming down his face. He couldn't tell if it was because of anger or grief or both. All he knew was that he had to leave. Leave this horrible school.

So he wiped of his tears, turned around and ran.

Away from the school building, past hundreds of students. No one stopped him. Maya stayed behind. Speechless.

~~~

'Lucas?'

'Yeah?'

'We'll always be friends, won't we?'

'Of course!'

'No matter what's gonna happen?'

'No matter what's gonna happen.'

'Even when we're adults?'

'Even when we're old and grey. You and I. Till the end.'

'Promise?'

'Promise!'

~~~

The last time Tyler visited Lucas and his spot was on the day Lucas died. He never dared to visit it afterwards. Until now.

After he ran away from school he got back to this place. He and Lucas used to be there a lot.

Tyler didn't knew where else to go. He couldn't go back to school. Or home.

This was the only place he could be alone. No one would notice his breakdown. Or hear his screams.

'You promised! You hear me? Promised! You said... you said you and I... we... you said...'

Tyler thought they had a lot of time left. Their whole lives. After all they would always be friends. They would always be there for each other. No matter what. That's what they promised each other.

But fate didn’t seem to care about little boys’ promises.

'Why? Why you of all peolpe?'

Tyler sat down on the floor, his back against a large rock.

Slowly his anger turned back into the familiar feeling of grief and despair.

Suddenly he just felt... exhausted. So he closed his eyes for a while.

As he was sitting there, eyes closed, he had the sudden feeling that he wasn't alone.

But that was impossible. No one ever came here. Still, it felt like someone... or something was with him.

So he opened his eyes and what he saw shocked him. There was indeed someone. Right in front of him. And he watched him with concern.

Tyler recognized his face immediately. This face - He would know it in death.

But... that wasn't possible.

'Lucas?'

#again this is the original unedited 2017 version #writer speaks #writing #my writing #writeblr #wip: always by your side #discontinued #story #chapter 2 #chapter 3

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caranfindel · 5 years

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Recap/review 14.18: “Absence”

THEN: I am a Winchester! Which means I do awful and wonderful things! Like saving Sam (Saaaaaammmm!!!) and torturing Nick and doing Something Bad to Mary! And possibly losing my soul! Whoopsie!

NOW: Sam and Dean are just getting back to the bunker after the events of the previous episode. I assume they've given Donatello a ride home (which, as we've established, is x hours away), but maybe they stuck him in a cab like they did with Claire that one time. Maybe they found a car for him back at the abandoned warehouse. Sam drops his bag on the map table and they both start calling for Jack and Mary, but aren't too terribly concerned about them not being there. "They probably just stopped for a bite on the way back," Dean hypothesizes, when they settle in the library with a couple of beers. Um. Jack zapped them to Nick's cabin, didn't he? So what is on the "way back?" Are they going to zap to a McDonald's first? What is important is that Sam is still wearing that orange plaid shirt. And they're both pretty unperturbed, even for them, about what just happened.

Here's to another miraculous Sam Winchester survival. Gotta say, man, if Jack hadn't have healed you... you know, lately, it feels like we'd be up the creek without that kid. I mean, first he takes care of Michael, and then Nick...

I know, and he even got the blood out of my new orange plaid shirt, which means I can keep wearing it for this entire episode.

Yeah, I been meaning to talk to you about that. You've been adding a lot of orange to your wardrobe lately.

Just this shirt and that one jacket.

It's more orange than anyone needs. Sure, it fits you great, but so does that red and black plaid. Why don't you wear that shirt some more? Or that solid black shirt you have?

Sorry, but you know I'm a Texas fan. You're just going to have to put up with the orange.

At least I think that's how the conversation went. I could be remembering wrong.

I'm just saying. It's a lot of orange.

The point is, Dean appreciates Jack and recognizes everything he's done for them. Dean pulls out his phone to call her and they hear a buzzing, which is her phone, on the map table, right to Sam's bag. Sam, I know you're recently back from the dead (or near-dead) but it does seem like you would have noticed the phone there. (Also, how close is the library to war room? This makes it look like the map table is practically in the library.) Her keys are next to her her phone, and it's not until this very moment that I realize they didn't know she and Jack zapped to the cabin - they must have thought she and Jack drove there. Because obviously they didn't have a lot of conversation about it. Even though they had a long drive back and it does seem like Sam would have called his mother and asked how their end went.

Anyway. They're perturbed now. Sam tries to call Jack and we see him, staring, ignoring Sam's call.

Title card! (ha ha, I forgot we were still in the Now.)

The guys are making phone calls to all their contacts, and Sam reports Rowena has a spell that might be able to track Jack down. Oh, I love that Sam calls Rowena for help. LOVE IT. Dean gets a call from Cas and gives him the scoop. "Were they together?" Cas asks. “Alone?" Cas looks more Cassy than usual, and then tells Dean about the snake. "I don't think Jack is well, Dean," he says. Dean hangs up on him, which seems kind of rude, but neither he nor Sam act like the snake story is particularly significant. Then Sam gets the brilliant idea to track Jack's phone. (Sidebar: Should Cas be able to use his angelic powers to locate Mary and/or Jack? Discuss.)

Sam fires up the phone tracking website and expositions that they should be able to track him as long as his phone has power. (Listen, guys. You need Find My Friends. Best parent app EVER. It locates him in Nepal, but then he immediately appears in Peru. "Jack's flying," Sam says.

Eventually Jack tires of Paris and Lima and Madagascar and and flops to the ground back at the Cabin of Death, next to Nick's stolen truck. He pulls out his phone, revealing a low battery (so much for that plan, Sam) and several missed calls and messages from the rest of TFW 2.0. He has some flashbacks to happier times with Mary, and then in the background we notice someone standing on the porch of the cabin. They're wearing jeans, and their face is hidden in the darkness, and I'm open to the possibility that Jack actually zapped Mary somewhere instead of killing her (and according to the 14.17 poll, some of you are also open to this), so for a second I think it's going to be Mary standing there. But no.

On the TV:

Nick?

Hmm. Guess again. Hello, son.

At my house:

OH FUCK.

Sorry. I'm just really tired of him.

So, after Jack left to do more important things (Saaaaaaammmmmm!!!!), Lucifer made it back into the world? I mean, this is awful, but it would mean Lucifer is the Big Bad instead of Nick, so... not ALL awful? But it's not Lucifer either - "I'm your subconscious, or whatever," he says. Oh god, it's Hallucifer. Jack has his own version of Hallucifer, JUST LIKE HIS PRIMARY DAD. He's here to help, allegedly, though he doesn't seem all that helpful. "Buddy, you killed Mary Winchester. You cannot come back from that, and you know it." Well. I guess she's officially dead, then. Or is she? Where's the body? I mean, Hallucifer is just Jack's subconscious. So if Jack thinks he killed Mary, so does Hallucifer. That doesn't make it so. Jack tells Hallucifer that it was an accident, and he's all, sure, tell Sam and Dean that, I'm sure they'll understand. (It's funny because it's not true!)

Cut to the Winchesters, driving through the night. Sam expositions that Cas will meet them at the cabin (how do any of them even know where this cabin is?) and speculates that maybe Lucifer is behind whatever happened, not Jack. And maybe Jack thought he was being kind when he killed the snake. Because Sam is grasping for anything that exonerates his son (sob!). But Dean's not accepting it and doesn't want to talk about it. Then Sam's laptop or tablet or whatever he's using beeps with notification that Jack's signal has been lost. Uh oh. (So I guess that's how they found the cabin?) Oooh, yes, we actually get confirmation that it's in Longton "KA" (which doesn't exist and I suspect is supposed to be KS, SERIOUSLY, GUYS).

Longton KANSAS is 4.5 hours from Lebanon. In case anyone but me is curious.

When they get to the cabin, there's no sign of Jack or Mary or Hallucifer. Just the stolen truck. Sam goes inside and Dean looks outside and oh, who's going to be the one to find the body? First I'm sure it's going to be Sam, because there's a lumpy pile of blankets on the bed, but it must just be blankets, and Sam doesn't even look under them. He does find a body, but it's Nick, not Mary. And then I'm sure it's going to be Dean, because he comes across something disturbing outside and ignores Sam's calls. But what he found is... well, it's hard to see what it is in the dark. Apparently it's a blast zone. A big one.

Cas is sitting in his truck somewhere, having his own warm and fuzzy Mary flashback where she eats a candy bar after a hunt without washing her hands and refuses to let Cas heal her because she's still a little bit afraid of him. He tells her that, no matter what other things there are to deal with, Sam and Dean are glad she's here. "Finally they don't have to be so alone." Wow, that's a dumb thing to say. Mary agrees with me and says "Castiel, they were never alone. And if they were, me being here wouldn't fix that, since I'm always off doing other things." That's how I remember it, anyway. Reverie over, Cas gets out of the truck to face the music - he's at the Cabin of Death.

Inside, Sam is covering Nick's body. He and Dean have some concerned conversation about whether Nick deserved whatever Jack did to him and conclude that Jack must have made it as painful as possible or otherwise killed him in some inappropriate way. And there are very good, valid reasons for them to come to this conclusion. I mean, I can't think of them right now, after watching the episode twice and ruminating for several hours, but I'm sure something will come to me very soon. Let me just go check my Tumblr feed again. I bet they're there.

(Seriously. Nick looks like he was burned out by an angel. That's all.)

They're surprised when Cas walks in, because they didn't hear his giant truck or see his headlights in the dark Cabin of Death. They tell him they haven't found anything except the blast site that looks like something "angelic, but bigger." Dean theorizes that it could have been Lucifer, but Sam points out that Jack said he took care of Lucifer, and I'm not sure why they've reversed their positions. Because in the car, Sam was the one who thought it might have been Lucifer. Script mix-up? Someone brought Jensen the wrong pages? Anyway. Dean says "If he did something to her, if she is... then you're dead to me." Pointing as Cas, because Cas knew something was wrong with Jack. Well, that hardly seems fair. When he first told you the snake story, Dean, you didn't think it meant anything at all. But NOW, all of a sudden, it was some ironclad harbinger of doom?

"I was scared. I believed in Jack for so long. I believed that he was good. I knew that he would be good for the world. He was good for us. My faith in him, it never wavered, and then I saw what he did. It wasn't malice, it wasn't evil, it was like Jack saw a problem and he solved it, with that snake. What he did wasn't bad. It was the absence of good, and I saw that in him. But we were a family and I didn't want to lose that..."

And I'm going to stop here, because this is the most important part of Cas's speech. This is the core issue. Jack's not bad, he just might not be good either. He thought he was doing the right thing. And he's family. Is any of this familiar, Dean? Any of it at all? Cas also says that he wanted to "fix it" on his own, so he left and didn't tell anyone. Neither brother asks how he thought he was going to fix it, but I guess they'll get the story of the failed faux Samulet someday. Right now we just have Sam looking sad and guilty and Dean looking angry and guilty but mostly angry.

Sam's phone rings - it's Rowena. She says she was unable to scry Jack because "his energy is too unstable; it's like looking at the sun." And as for Mary? "I don't know what happened, or where she is, but I can tell you with certainty - Mary Winchester is no longer on this earth." At this point, I'm still ready to accept that she's been zapped to a different dimension. I mean, there's no body. But TFW accepts it as her being dead, and Dean starts throwing furniture and Sam is despondent and flinchy (and hoo boy, I love that combination.)

So what do we do?

What do we always do when we lose one of our own?

Bad things. Very bad things. He declares "we fight to bring them back." And they will call on Rowena, because "she's got the Book of the Damned; she's resurrected herself more times than we can count." (Not to quibble, but we've only seen her resurrected twice. You yourself have been resurrected more times than that, Dean.) He orders Cas to go to Heaven and find Mary, and orders Sam to tell Rowena they're on their way. Mmmm, angry bossy Dean. I like that combination too.

Another thing I like about this scene is that it's one of those times when Sam turns into the little brother. When he looks at Dean and asks "what do we do," because that's how this works.

So much to like.

We go to Rowena's place, and if you're wondering where she lives and how far it is from the Cabin of Death, you're not alone. She's working away on her spell, though it sounds like she says cumin so maybe it's actually a chili recipe, when someone bangs on her door. "That was fast," she says. But when she answers the door... oh god, it's Jack, and for the first time in this episode I actually feel some concern. DO NOT HURT HER, JACK. (Rowena, I apologize for not appreciating you when you first arrived on the scene. I adore you now and you must remain.)

She pretends she doesn't know what happened, asking if he's well and telling him 2/3 of his dads are looking for him. He admits he accidentally killed Mary by just thinking it for a second and oh, imagine how horrible that would be, if the awful things that popped into your mind for one second actually came to pass. Or maybe I have more intrusive thoughts than y'all do. Anyway. "I need to undo it," he says. "You need to help me undo it." She explains that the magic she normally uses has to be in place before you die, so he suggest the book (I adore the way she says book) and she tells him about the spell. It requires "enormous power" but simple ingredients that could probably be found in the bunker.

Someone bangs on the door again - it's Dean. Jack accuses her of stalling, but they only talked for like 90 seconds, so, okay. She asks him to talk to his "kin," but he grabs her arm. Sam kicks the door in (with hair in his face and yes it is hot) but it's too late - Jack has zapped her out.

Sadly, I have not found a gif yet, so this will have to do.

Cut to Cas at the Stairway to Heaven, calling for Naomi. No one responds.

Jack and Rowena appear in the bunker, and he pulls her along, but happens to notice some gouges in the floor. And now we get another flashback. Mary is trying to teach him how to handle a knife, and he keeps dropping it on the floor. She's all sweet and supportive and blah blah blah, and Jack says Dean will kill him for gouging the floor when they get him back, so this must be during the Michael!Dean period. Mary pulls the table over to cover the damaged floor, but who is that in the background? It's bearded Sam! Oh, long lost Beard of Despair! How I've missed you! (Is it fake? Is it real? Was this a deleted scene? Or did they plan for what was coming, and film this before he shaved it off? Does Jared just grow a beard that quickly? I DO NOT CARE.)

He feels bad for not being there for Jack while he was busy looking for Dean, and then he apologizes for complaining to her. But she's relieved not to be the only one with "parental guilt." Because they went through so much without her, and then things were "complicated" when she got back. "I'm just saying, parenting is always a struggle. You always feel like you're failing, but then you look at them, and somehow, they're amazing. Somehow, they're literally the bravest, kindest, most heroic men on the planet." Well, this is true. Very true. And I'm glad she's giving Sam the praise and validation he SO deserves but come on, Mary. What do you know about parenting? You did it for four years. When did you feel like you were failing six-month-old Sam?

YES, MARY, I WANT TO TOUCH IT TOO

Fade to Sam. Interesting that Jack's warm fuzzy flashback turned into Sam's. (It's because Sam is his primary dad! It is known!) They're still at Rowena's, and Dean is still ranting about Cas not telling them about the snake. EVEN THOUGH DEAN DIDN'T CARE ABOUT THE SNAKE WHEN CAS FIRST TOLD HIM.

Cas, Cas should have told us. As soon as he saw Jack going Dahmer on his stupid snake, he should have told us.

Dean, it wasn't just Cas. We knew Jack was dangerous. We always knew. Long before he killed Michael. You more than anyone. I mean, from the very beginning you knew. But, you know, we fell for him, because he had a good heart and a good soul. And then, he didn't. And that's on me, too, by the way. I mean, I'm the one that made the call to bring him back. He didn't ask for that. I decided for him. And you warned me.

Oooh. Sam. No. Because:

1) Dean didn't KNOW from the very beginning. He was, in fact, WRONG at the very beginning, when he thought Jack was evil. Jack was not evil, and you insisted on giving him a chance, and YOU WERE RIGHT. Jack becoming "evil" in the future (and he's not even EVIL, he's just naive and untrained and too powerful for his own good) wasn't anything Dean predicted.

b) Dean didn't exactly fight very hard to stop Sam from bringing Jack back. Seems like most of his concern was that it wouldn't work, not that it was a bad idea in and of itself.

Then Sam says "You know, after Maggie and the other hunters died, I just left. I just dumped Jack on Cas and left." Well, I'm not a big fan of "Maggie and the other hunters" (reminds me too much of "Sting and the Police" and I don't know why Maggie - or Sting - were so damn special that they deserved to be singled out as the only ones in the group with a name), but I also don't have any memory of Sam leaving after Michael killed the other hunters. And when he did, he wanted to take Jack, but Dean wouldn't let him. But Sam says he knew something was going to happen and he's wallowing in guilt. Dean admits that he also knew there was a risk, because of what Donatello told him about not being sure. Well, thank Chuck for that. I'm glad Dean's not letting Sam shoulder all the blame for something that wasn't his fault.

Angry Dean and sad Sam, two things I adore.

Back at the bunker, Rowena is gathering her cumin and other ingredients. Jack's getting impatient, and she tells him that she could have fought him, but she didn't. "Because you want the same thing the boys want. That I want." This is a beautiful, beautiful moment, with Rowena wanting what "the boys" want, but it's interrupted by Hallucifer, who doesn't even know why Jack is doing any of this. "To ease your guilt? But you don't have guilt any more, do you, Jack? Admit it. You don't feel anything any more." Well. Everything Hallucifer says comes from Jack's head, so what do we think about this? Does Jack really not feel anything any more? I disagree. If he didn't feel anything, if he didn't want Mary back, if he didn't care about forgiveness, why would he even bother? So I think our boy does feel something. Rowena is disturbed by Jack talking to his hallucination, but she carries on and finishes the spell. They have everything they need except the body. Oh.

Stairway to Heaven. Cas isn't going anywhere until Naomi talks to him. Someone finally shows up, but it's Duma.

Where's Naomi?

Well, I'd tell you it's none of your business, but you already know it's none of your business. Naomi just gets paid more than I do, and we've already got all the regular guest stars in this episode, so we had to cut some corners.

At least that's how I remember it. She tells him Mary is at peace in "a special Heaven" and "is complete" and he should just let her be.

Jack takes Rowena to the Cabin of Death, but Mary's body isn't there. He thinks she should be able to complete the spell anyway, but she says she can't. He wants to do it himself, but she says he's in no shape, and "disposition affects execution." She tells him that whatever he brings back won't be Mary, and refuses to help him and OH I'M CONCERNED FOR HER AND HE REACHES OUT AND PUSHES HER and she just ends up being shoved back into her apartment. WHEW. She calls Sam and tells him what Jack is doing, and that it won't work because there's no body, and Jack has snapped and they need to stop him." Necromancy is a delicate art, unpredictable under ideal circumstances. In his state, I fear your boy will bring back something terrible." WELL, THAT'S ENCOURAGING. (Also, Rowena is hilarious in this scene.)

Jack sits in the corpse-less blast zone and performs the ritual and a huge swirling purple cloud appears overhead and I'm thinking, is this our out? Is Jack going to summon something awful, something that can be the Big Bad so he doesn't have to? Please? He notices the Impala nearby, and uses his powers to stop it in its tracks. Luckily it's just right outside the cabin. Sam and Dean run toward him, and we see him looking down at whatever he has summoned, but he doesn't look happy about it. Neither do the Winchesters. "It didn't work," he says, before zapping out.

Oh, the thing he brought back is Mary. Well, Mary's corpse, apparently. Dean holds her and finds her still dead, and he's sad and we get his flashback, which is just Mary leaning on him, asleep in the car, and then Sam comes and holds Dean as he holds Mary and everybody's sad, we're all sad, so terribly terribly sad and we get a crane shot and it's a very lovely scene but I can't help thinking um, correct me if I'm wrong, but we do have that missing piece now, right?

Jack ends up at some industrial kind of place, where Hallucifer tells him there's no going back. "Cas, Sam, Dean, they're never going to trust you again. And you know what that means. You can never trust THEM." And oh, this is Jack's head telling him that. Poor baby.

Bunker. Sam has his box of treasures and he's looking at the few remaining family photos. He looks up, full of hope, when Cas comes in. But Cas tells him Mary is in Heaven and at peace. Dean shows up in time to hear this, and asks if he's just going to take Duma's word for it, because she's a known liar and also might possibly be that dude from The Empty. He says no, he actually saw Mary's Heaven, and we see her door with the dates 1954-1983 and 2016-2019 on it, which of course begs the question of what Sam and Dean's doors are going to look like.

He says he saw her with John (way to bury the lede, Cas), and they're full of joy. But was it really John? Haven't we established that most people are in their own individual Heavens, and if she has a John, it's just an avatar? I mean, John's name wasn't on the door. And I expect Dean, at least, to insist they try to bring her back anyway. But Sam says Rowena told him that what Jack brought back was just an empty replica, "incapable of holding life." (I mean, I feel like that sometimes.) "So what are we supposed to do now?" he asks. And again, Sam is looking to Dean to lead them through this, and yet he's got to know what they SHOULD do. He's got to be thinking of Mary, safe and happy in Heaven, and of ripping someone (anyone, no one in particular, right Sam?) away from that and forcing them to continue on Earth just because you can't be without them. He's got to be thinking of that.

"What we always do," Dean says. And the last time he said that, in this very episode, it meant we do something awful, we throw our own lives away or make some horrible bargain or damn the world in order to bring her back. But this time, it just means that we give her a hunter's funeral. And Sam doesn't look like he was ready for that after all.

So Mary gets a very dramatic pyre, and a montage? Did anyone else get a montage? Ellen, Jo, Bobby, Kevin, Crowley? JOHN? ANYONE? A FREAKING MONTAGE? NO. Grrr. Cas tries to get closer to Dean and Sam puts out a hand and stops him. Also, Sam burns a photo of her and I don't know why.

And finally, we cut to the library table where Sam and Dean carved their initials and we see they are joined by a M.W. Um. What about John? Didn't he get to carve his intials? (NO. Those are only for people who get a montage.)

Also, now that I'm going back to get screencaps, it doesn't look like her intials were there at the beginning of the episode. So she didn't carve them, one of the guys did. And not Dad's? Cold, boys.

You know, last week, like, five or ten minutes before the end of the episode, I thought if Jack hadn't cemented his place in Dean's heart already, he's certainly there now. Because he saved Sam. No matter what else Jack did or is doing or will do, he saved Sam. And I want someone to point that out. I want Sam to say "no, I'm not ready to give up on him, and you realize the only reason I'm here to argue with you is because Jack saved me, right? And if he is soulless, he lost it by saving our asses, right?" (Is this because I watched "Clip Show" a couple of days ago and watched Sam frantically try to soothe Sarah as she died from Crowley's handiwork, and I want Jack to get the same kind of second chance that Crowley got? Maybe.) Now, I realize killing Mary is more awful than anything Crowley (or any other enemy-turned-frenemy) has done to them. But it was an accident. And HE SAVED SAM'S LIFE. Come on. That counts for something.

(Sidebar: We also learned, in that scene back in season 8, that Crowley's mother was a witch. {blows a big wet kiss to the Continuity Fairy})

So, how do I feel about Mary being gone? Here's the deal. This show, at its heart, is about two (or three) men who have a giant bleeding Mary Winchester-sized hole in their lives. Filling that hole does not make for good television. And the Show tried to make her interesting and edgy by playing against what we thought we knew about her (she can't cook! she can't stay away from hunting! she sleeps with both Arthur Ketch and New Bobby!), it tried to make her both a source of conflict and a source of comfort, and ultimately (as far as I'm concerned) it just failed. She was so much more effective as that siren song of the impossible apple pie life. I said earlier and I'll repeat it here... the fact that they had to retcon all of these warm fuzzy flashbacks, instead of using actual clips, just shows how shallow these relationships were. There wasn't anything real to fall back on. And the way they spend these two episodes trying to make us care? It had the opposite effect on me. I'm glad to be shed of her.

But maybe that's just me. Maybe absence will make the heart grow fonder. We shall see. Come on and tell me what you think, and remember, no spoilers in the comments, please!

#spn #tv recaps #recap #14.18 #spoilers #beard of despair

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