#anyone else always starts crying 2 minutes into the episode no matter how many times they watched it

[softdavidrose]

i feel like no matter how many shows i watch, the parks and rec finale will always be my favorite and it will always make me bawl my eyes out for 40 minutes straight

#iole.txt #yes i just finished one last ride I'm gonna need 5-7 business days to recover thank you #anyone else always starts crying 2 minutes into the episode no matter how many times they watched it? just me? #you guys ann's here 😭😭😭😭😭 #parks and recreation

[theimprobabledreamersworld]

Day 2 of Loceit Week!

I enjoyed writing this one, based on the prompt ‘Aftermath’ :) It can be seen as platonic or romantic, I’ll leave that up to you :) And yeah, there are quite a few Doctor Who references in this one... I like Doctor Who! <3

Hope you like it! 

@loceitweek2021

Writing Taglist: @psychedelicships @jwillowwolf @red-imeanblue @lost-in-thought-20 @the-duke-of-nuts @writerwithtoomanyships

Read on Ao3!

‘The Aftermath’

Logan and Janus. Warning for mentions of arguments, overwhelmed emotions and upset moments.

Word Count: 1,565

Janus sighed as he heard a soft tap on his closed room door. If he opened the door to find Remus there eating spaghetti through a straw for the third time this week alone, he felt like he was going to scream. He… loved Remus platonically, he truly did, but there’s only so much of his crazy behaviour he could handle in a short space of time.

He put down his book and apprehensively shuffled opened the door. Uncharacteristically, he was surprised to see Patton standing there, he was staring at the floor and his eyes bore a sadness that Janus had never seen on his face before. I mean, come on. The guy was the literal embodiment of sunshine and lollipops. It was sickening sometimes, but seeing him so drastically sad, that was even more unbearable.

“Patton?” He tried to get him to raise his head, but he refused to look up from the floor. Normally, he wouldn’t have cared, but this shows that something serious has happened.

“You need to go to Logan… w- we had a fight! I said some things I regret; and he won’t talk to any of us. I- I know it’s a lot to ask, but you’re my only hope. I- I need to know that he’s okay.” Janus just stared as the tears cascaded down Patton’s face, and his heart pounded as he thought about the notion of Logan sitting in his room alone. Knowing Logan, he probably wasn’t doing okay and despite the cold persona he puts on, he wanted- no, needed, to go help Logan. He cared about him too much to let him go through this alone.

“I’ll take care of him. It’s going to be alright, Patton.” He put a hand lightly on Patton’s shoulder before walking briskly to Logan’s closed door.

Janus took a deep breath and tapped three times on the blue door with one Doctor Who quote in the middle of it written aggressively in pen. ‘Good men don’t need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many.’ He wasn’t okay. Janus just hoped he’d be able to do something to help.

“Will you all just go away?!” Logan shouted at his closed room door. Janus couldn’t help but step back. The anger was powerful; and Logan’s voice was shaking ferociously. It was clear that his emotions were overwhelming him. Janus knew he needed to get to him as soon as possible, he couldn’t stand hearing him so hurt.

“Sorry, darling. I’m afraid you won’t be able to get rid of me that easily.” He spoke softly, hoping that Logan would hear that he was being genuine under the snarky tone. He could practically feel the hesitation from this side of the door.

“Please, Logan. As much I love the fact that I haven’t upset you for once, I can’t stand hearing you so hurt. Let me help.” He tried to keep the sarcasm in his tone, but his voice began to break towards the end; and he heard Logan sigh. He could also hear sniffles as the door opened a miniscule amount before footsteps shuffled back to the bed again. Janus pushed the door open and slowly made his way to Logan. He smiled gently as he sat on the corner of Logan’s bed and Logan raised his head up slowly.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Logan shook his head vigorously and Janus nodded, letting him know that it was okay. He saw Logan’s hands shaking so he shuffled closer and held out his hands in between the two of them. Logan looked puzzled, before putting his hands on top of Janus’. Immediately, he could feel that he was starting to calm down, the anger was slowly dissipating. He just held Logan’s hands and rubbed his thumbs across the back of them, with anyone else, this would have been an uncomfortable silence, but that was never the case between the two of them, no matter what they were doing.

“I’m here, Logan. I promise. I will stay here for as long as you want me to be.” He smiled sincerely and was overcome with surprise when Logan moved his hands away and launched himself at Janus into an unexpected hug. As he buried his head into Janus’ neck, he held him a tight as he could. He rubbed his hands up and down his back while Logan sighed, almost debating whether he should talk or not. Janus didn’t mind though, he was starting to feel okay and that was the most important thing.

“I’m sorry… I’ve never been this consumed by emotions before. I always try to distance myself from them, they distract me. When I let things get to me, it makes me… weak.” Janus gripped onto Logan harder, he just needed to hold him, so he knows that everything is okay. He also wanted to say something, something that would get through to Logan so he knows that emotions aren’t a bad thing. They’re absolutely not a weakness. A lightbulb moment erupted in his mind as he remembered the quote on Logan’s door, he knew what to say.

“Letting it get to you. You know what that’s called? Being alive. Best thing there is. Being alive right now is what counts.” Logan pulled himself out of the hug and looked at Janus with a surprised look on his face.

“Doctor Who reference? Fantastic.” He laughed and Janus smiled back when he saw how relaxed Logan had become, that made him feel a lot better as well, even if that was a selfish thought… He didn’t care at this point.  

“Yeah… I totally didn’t steal your Season 6 boxset last month… I wanted to watch Doctor Who so I had something to talk to you about.” He looked at the floor and a small blush spread across his face at the admission he just made, and Logan just beamed even more.

“I wondered where that went… But I don’t mind. It’s nice that someone else wanted to watch it to talk about it with me… It’s nice not being called a joke for once too.” Janus felt a small flicker of anger when he heard the hurt in Logan’s voice. He faced Logan and gently lifted his head with two fingers so he was looking into his eyes.

“Now normally, I would give some kind of sarcastic quip as a response, but even I know that this isn’t the time for that. Logan. You are not a joke. You are smart, logical, talented, you keep the order. You stop everyone from doing things they will regret later on. You have saved the day on so many occasions, it would make anyone’s head spin. Sure, mistakes have been made from time to time, but everyone does. No one can be perfect… but you, Logan… You’re the closest thing to perfect I have ever known.” They both smiled gently at each other and Logan buried his head in Janus’ chest once again. They stayed that way for a few minutes before Janus leant back to ask Logan a question.

“How about I go and get that boxset from my room? We could watch it for a little bit? If you want me to stay with you that is.” He stood up while Logan nodded excitedly, and as Janus saw the sparkle return to Logan’s eyes, he knew everything would be okay.

“Could you… could you quickly give a message to Patton? Just tell him that I’m okay, and I’ll talk to him tomorrow.” Janus nodded and ran up to his room so he could get back to Logan as soon as possible. He scribbled a note to Patton as he found the DVDs and on his way back, he pushed the paper under the lighter blue door. He saw it being taken and could hear Patton sigh in relief. His work was done. He opened Logan’s door and he was taken back by everything he had done in the space of five minutes.

“Well, you have been busy…” He looked around and saw a galaxy projection on the ceiling, string lights around the bed which turned it into a T.A.R.D.I.S-like fort. It was amazing. Logan patted the bed and Janus put the DVD into the TV before lying down next to him. As the first episode began, Janus smiled as he saw Logan miming all of the words. As he gradually began to move even closer to Janus, he lifted his arm up and scooped Logan close. This felt nice, and both of them knew that this is exactly what Logan needed… and deep down, it’s what Janus needed too.

They moved through season after season, laughing and crying together at everything that was going on. By halfway though Season Eight, Janus could see that Logan was starting to get tired as he desperately tried to keep his eyes open. He put his hands though Logan’s hair and softly stroked it, reassuring Logan it was okay to fall asleep if he wanted to, he was safe. In the silence, one part of the episode rang out in the room…

‘Love is not an emotion. It’s a promise.’

As Janus looked down at the now sleeping Logan, he knew what he felt and that he would be keeping a promise to Logan. Always.

#loceitweek2021 #ts janus #ts logan #loceit #platonic loceit #or romantic if you'd like to interpret it as such #ts fanfic #sanders sides fanfiction #fluff #hurt and comfort #doctor who references #tw argument mention #tw overwhelmed emotions #this was fun to write #:)

[hyucksong]

nct dream as roommates

a/n: *romantically calls you bro* 

lee mark 

the roommate that walked in on you taking a shower on the first night you moved in and avoided you for a week afterward

he even went as far as browsing different apartments to live in because baby boy was too afraid to face you

sometimes wakes up before you and he always prepares your coffee or tea and sets it by your bed for you when you wake up…sometimes sits on the edge of your bed to watch you

asks you to do his laundry because he doesn’t know how to separate the colors

you’re fine with doing them because he tries his absolute bestest with everything else, and it’s so cute

the first time he did the laundry you were sick…and you got a whole new wardrobe of pink clothing the next day

always does the dishes and you do the laundry…he’ll clean the living room and kitchen if you clean the bathrooms…he’ll go grocery shopping…only if you go with him

asks you to do his hair when he meets up with his friends, and if you say no he says “okay” and then pouts until you agree

you really like photography but hiring models is expensive so you always ask mark to model for you

and he always agrees, blushing while doing so

make-up artists are expensive too, so you also get him dressed up and add whatever you want to his face

(once you did a fairy photoshoot and he had freckles and pink cheeks and your heart did the thing) 

this time you need him to sit still for hours because it's supposedly a big photoshoot with a few other photographers coming too, so there’s a lot of looks to get through 

you do the first look before you get to the photo site to save time

he thinks nothing of you curling his hair until he looks up at you and time slows as his heart stops…

because you smell like vanilla and your nose is scrunched in concentration…because your breathing is heavy as you run to the bathroom to get more things before you’re late…

because you’re biting your lip while looking at him, admiring your own work, proud of the way the make-up came out, but a little disheartened because it looked like you put a little too much blush (even though you only put a little) 

and mark thinks,,, oh no

fuck

huang renjun

your best friend since you were a child

you’re used to ‘living with him’ because you practically lived with him as a kid; you were always at his house spending the night or vice versa 

he wakes you up an hour after he gets up because ‘he needs his peaceful time’

claims that ‘you’re the worst person to live with’ but refuses to look for another apartment because ‘no one else can handle you but me’

(in reality, he knows that there will never be anyone else he’ss comfortable with as you) 

he wakes you up by throwing a pillow in your face and or flopping on your bed next to you and bouncing a few times

once got really scared because you weren’t waking up no matter what he did, and when he started to tear up you opened your eyes and pushed him off the bed 

you just didn’t want to be woken up that day and tried to ignore him, but apparently, you ignored him for too long because he genuinely freaking out on the inside

he’s watched ‘what’s eating gilbert grape’ okay he was SCARED

he didn’t talk to you for three days after that....only started to wake you up again because you made the effort to wake up before him and make him breakfast in bed with hot tea

he expected you to leave his room after you gave it to him, but you just looked at him for a minute before sitting on the bed next to him, getting under the covers with him 

he focused on the fact you were taking up all the space instead of the now-familiar thrum of his heartbreak against his ribcage

(he’s felt it for the past fewyears, he’s gotten used to drowning it out) 

“y/nnnnnnn what are you doingggggg”

“shut up i made the breakfast, can’t i at least sit next to my favorite boy?”

...he’s your favorite boy?...okaythatwasreallycutebuthe’llneveradmitit

“o...kay...”

blushes when you lay your head on his shoulder in bed, watching whatever he’s doing on his phone, because your cheek is warm against his shirt and its bleeding through onto his skin and weiowioegfhowieh

but also yells at you when you take a bite of his toast and bolt out of the room, giggling

“yAH y/N”

lee jeno

the roommate that was awkward for the first month because he didn’t really want to room with a girl because then he can’t spend saturday with the boys 

then he brought them home one day without telling you and was expected to get his ass Whopped but you were drinking vodka and crying while watching Cars so

yeah you were the perfect roommate for him

you drink together

saturday may be for the boys but sunday is for drinking your problems away with your roommate 

can’t cook but will make BOMB desserts for you both every friday...also fridays are pizza nights and you both order a large cheese pizza with ranch on the side and a pint of dr.pepper

yall have the same diet but he has a six-pack and you don’t so you call bullshit on health and everything it is

both of you fall asleep on the couch all the time, TV still playing the game soundtrack with the controllers on the floor, blinking from low battery

jeno alwayswakes up before you, and he doesn’t admit it, but he loves to watch you sleep

you just look so...ethereal 

even with the drool

ANYWAY

you are one of the bros...he’s even taken a shit when you took a shower before -- that’s how close you are 

then one day you get dressed up real pretty and he’s making fun of you, laughing “you never look this nice who’s holding you at gunpoint”

“i’m going on a date jeno hop off my DICK”

“,,,what”

immediately felt defensive and was questioing who could like you and why you were going on a saturday night when it was busy on the streets and also please call the guy and cancel the date because he wants to watch toy story with you and eat pasta why are you going out with someone has he met him why haven’t you told jeno about this guy you know what you should just not go

and it’s when you walk out the door rolling your eyes, promising to be back home before 9pm with a cute shirt on and nice perfume on when jeno realizes 

that damn he hates to see you leave,,,but he loves to watch you go

(and he might have the teeniest, weeniest crush on you) 

lee donghyuck

the type to never clean the dishes and always makes you do them even if he cooks because he hates the feeling of wet food

then one day he sees you v e r y stressed over school work and he just...cleans the whole house

you come back from the library and you’re like,,,the fuck where’s haechan and what have you done with him

in turn, you buy him a headset that he’s been wanting for the past year...and you think he’s about to propose to you after you give them to him

but in all reality he’s just so happy that you even remembered something so trivial...like he talking about them once (1) and you remembered?

...cute bitch

he’s a big prankster, but in an endearing way, so whenever he goes too far you never really stay mad because he’s just a little unaware of the anger his pranks cause

plus you always get back at him 

always :)

you both are basically the same people; you’re passionate about your studies and he’s passionate about gaming and dancing

yall are the bad bitches that no one messes with 

BET that yall wear matching fits whenever you two go out together

you get together to watch his favorite youtubers do let’s plays of popular games

one day yall sit down to watch some outlast 2

and boy

did you underestimate the scare factor

so now you’re three episodes deep into the let’s play and your head is buried in haechans stomach because you’re laying down facing away from the TV, clinging to the poor boy

he doesn’t know if his heart is beating so fast because of the jumpscare or because of the way you look up at him when you ask if the scary part is over yet

he doesn’t like seeing you scared with tears in your eyes...but the way you’re clinging to him makes him want to watch a thousand more scary episodes...

...if it means you’ll cuddle with him

na jaemin

the best roommate you could ever ask for

he loves to clean and cook, not to mention he’s an absolute sweetheart!!!!!!!

you started to live with him because you had posted an ad on a website for a roommate and he sent back a reply

but the texts used so many of (=｀ω´=) these emojis you just assumed it was a girl

he was not

every night before you go to bed, he’ll walk into your room and whisper “good night, sleep well” to you before petting you head and walking out

people always wonder if you’re dating, but you always reply that it’s just the way he is

until one night you invite your (asshole) project partner to your apartment and she flirts with him endLESSLY,,, not doing her work or anything, just talking with jaems

like it’s pissing you off, and you think it’s pissing him off, and you’re about to send her home when you notice the storm outside and you realize,,,, you’re too good of a person to do that

so she sleeps on the couch, and you do the same, just so you can keep an eye on her and so that she isn’t left alone with jaemin at any point (poor boy looked like he’s about to combust if she tries to talk to him again) 

and jaemin does his usual routine even with the extra company, stroking your head and even going as far as to place a kiss on your forehead

“what about me, do I get a kiss” the girl annoyingly asked

“no, you’re not yn” and hE WALKS AWAY AND CLOSES THE DOOR TO HIS ROOM 

there’s silence in your head as you process his words, a little shocked and confused as to what he means, but most of all, your thoughts consist of;

oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit

you might have just fallen for him (let’s face it, you’ve been in love with him (just not as long as he’d been in love with you)) 

zhong chenle

not going to lie, you two did NOT get along in the beginning

you were each other’s first roommates, and you knew he was extroverted, but you underestimated the differences between your personalities

like,,, no please don’t invite the dreamies over again for the eighth time this week I can’t focus on homework with all the screaming

but even with all the head-butting, the chores are split evenly because he’s practicing to ‘be marriage material for his future wife’

you don’t care as long as he just does what he’s supposed to, and you two aren’t exactly the closest

but there are times when you connect, like on lazy Sunday afternoons where you both just relax on the couch...anywaY

and he always rolls his eyes, telling you that ‘you need to stop being a hermit and make some friends’

‘get some confidence’

‘why don’t you put any effort into how you dress’

it hurts a little...you know you’re not the prettiest and you don’t really try anyway

but to have it pointed out to you just...stings

and after a guy rejects you (after you built up courage for a whole years to confess to him) your confidence is at an all-time low (he said no because ‘you were too bland’ like wtf fUCk you)

and you’re just crying and eating spaghetti o’s, telling chenle as oon as you walk into the door that you’re ‘too sensitive for his bullshit today’ 

to which chenle doesn’t care... then he sees your puffy eyes and asks wha happens

you tell him, and he just gets...angry

(and jealous?)

he goes on a tangent, mocking the guy, saying that ‘you’re the most doen-to-earth natural beauty’ he’s ever seen and that ‘any guy who doesn’t fall in love with your cute sarcastic personality’ is dumber than a rock

he grumbles for the rest of the night, sitting and watching movies with you; it makes your heart swell that he’s getting so mad for you

and at the end of the mini-movie night, and he strokes your hair saying  that you’re ‘his little introvert’,

you decide that ‘opposite attract’ is 100% true

(and chenle notices that you have very pretty lips)

park jisung

you two are dorm roommates at a dance school, and y’all are so cute all the teachers LOVE you

like you both just spend so much time together it’s ridiculous

yall walk to class together, then from class to class together, eat lunch together, after school activities, walk back to the dorms, meet each other’s friends, go out on the weekends together...everything

it feels weird to not be with him

(the teachers have a bet that you’ll be dating before your senior year)

the dorm is just a studio apartment with two bedrooms (your parents both pay a lot for space) 

so chores aren’t too hard, in fact, you both usually spend the last few hours of daylight on Sunday nights straightening up your apartment from the hectic week before, to start off completely fresh and new

nothing big ever happens on Sundays around the home, but one day jisung (who went to hang out with chenle (he invited you but you pouted and said you had too much hmwk)) found a little puppy on the side of the road

and then proceeded to sneak into the dorms with it, hiding it under his shirt

when he showed you what he found, you couldn’t be mad...it was just so cute (both jisung’s little smile and the puppy) 

but you noticed it was shivering, and you whined, ‘jisung you didn’t even notice it was cold oH My GoD, go get it some water and food’ while you set up a nest of blankets for the little guy

hours later when the puppy had eaten and subsequently fallen asleep in your lap, you turned to jisung

‘let’s name it mousie’

‘what that’s dumb’

‘it’s not dumb! i wanna name it that because it looks like you whenever you sleep! it's so cute hehehe’

you thought jisung was WHAT when he slept

jisung didn’t talk for a whole minute, drinking in your words and thinking about them over and over again, in the meantime you were just smiling down at the puppy

your cheeks were red with happiness and your nose was a little red from sneezing (because the puppy was covered in pollen from being outside) and your gaze was filled with such love that jisung shivered

you let out a sigh and plopped your head on his shoulder, and all his feelings he’d ever had for you exploded in his chest, and he tensed (though if you noticed, you didn’t day anything)

you just kept and petting the dog

and damn did jisung want to be that dog

#jeno #jaemin #haechan #mark #jisung #renjun #chenle #nct dream reactions #nct dream #jeno fluff #jaemin fluff #mark fluff #haechan fluff #renjun fluff #chenle fluff #jisung fluff #nct dream fluff #nct #nct fluff #park jisung #mark lee #nct reactions #nct dream bullet point #nct cute #mark imagines #jeno imagines #jaemin imagines #renjun imagines #chenle imagines #jisung imagines

[what-breaks-my-heart]

Here are some brief thoughts on kdrama that started airing in 2020 that I've watched. I said brief, but those who have been following me would appreciate that this is indeed, brief.

The list is in alphabetical order.

1. 365: Repeat the Year (MBC)

Disclosure: I am a HUGE Lee Joon Hyuk stan. He is second only to Hyun Bin on my list. The fact that this drama is on the top of this list is a happy coincidence 🥰🥰

I was soooooooo excited when I knew Lee Joon Hyuk was to star in a new drama. MBC made the announcement of the drama late last year, and I was literally walking to the office when I saw the announcement on ig.

The premise of the drama was pretty straightforward. 10 people were given the chance to travel back in time exactly one year prior. Mysterious things kept happening to the people who took the trip, so our Detective Ji “Fluffy-Hair” Hyung Joo and webtoon writer Shin “Self-Hater” Ga Hyun joined hands to figure out what exactly happened.

Once they finally figured out what caused the mysterious cases, they faced a great dilemma on what to do, with our Fluffy Hair detective running as a fugitive.

The ending was really sad, and I really wished it ended differently, but the main character of the story was our Fluffy Hair detective, and him having to live on and reset the whole thing from the new past was a nice touch to the ending.

This drama was full of surprises, twist and turn, and it is certainly a drama I would consider rewatching in the future.

2. Do You Like Brahms? (SBS)

Many people criticised the second half of this drama. Apparently the year 2020 is the year when kdramaland keeps being a disappointment, and many people are quick to include this drama in the list of disappointing drama, despite having a good beginning.

I beg to differ though. To me this drama feels more of a healing drama, wherein the characters are forced to deal with their issues. And anyone who has had to go through any form of therapy knows how hard healing process is.

TL;DR: The main leads are both people who have been mentally abused by the people around them, except for Cha Young In, because she was the only reason I did not throw my remote control at my 50-inch TV.

Park Joon Young is your classic example of a ‘gifted kid’ struggle. He was seen as a young, talented pianist who had a bright future ahead of him. But people started to treat him more like a trophy than a human being, so he decided to take a sabbatical, much to the criticism of people in the music industry. Park Joon Young realised that his passion in playing the piano has faded away, no thanks to his abusive piano professor who belittled him again and again, and practically brainwashed him into being a people pleaser. You could see how Park Joon Young was not himself in the beginning of the drama once you finish the drama.

Chae Song Ah took interest in violin at a later age (much later than professional musicians) and decided to pursue her dream by enrolling into a music programme. Her classmates were all younger than her, and it didn’t help that they all learnt music since much younger. I love how Song Ah did not give up on her dream easily and gave it her all, before she finally decided to let go of her dream to become a musician. The metaphor of her love for violin and Joon Young hurting her again and again and she just endured it though.. I cried like a mess well I am a mess but that’s a separate issue

Special shout out to Cha Young In who was there for both of them.

3. Flower of Evil (tvN)

If thriller is your thing, consider this drama. If you are one of those people who like to see your characters being tortured (physically and mentally), this drama is a MUST WATCH. And if you enjoy watching Lee Joon Ki playing a character who is put at a great distress because he is trying to run from his past, go watch this drama.

More importantly, if you enjoy a drama where your ML is sexy, attends to house chores and takes care of his bright young daughter while his wife goes crazy for solving violent crimes, a devoted husband who is attentive and a tender person but also a freak in the sheets, you are wasting every single of your breath not watching this drama.

I mean look at this man teasing his wife about his stamina.

Flower of Evil did not feel draggy at all. Everything that happened within the first 6 episodes could have been an entire drama if this was written by someone else. Seriously, this drama kept me at the edge of my couch!

The dynamic of HS and JW screams POWER COUPLE but at the same time it broke my heart how they were pushed into corners too many times by the people around them I do hope they had some sexy times while they were in the corners though

The focus on their wedding rings throughout the drama symbolised their unbreakable bond. The wedding rings were literally the very last thing that kept them together when JW stumbled upon evidences that pointed against HS.

JW, whose compass was only trusting what she saw, and not what she heard, tried to break the stigma of women being at a disadvantage in the police force. Heck, she was better than her entire team when it came to solving cases, her being the only woman in the team. Who said women cannot make good cops?

The plot twist though.. And the climax.. To this day, I still listen to this soundtrack from the drama and cry just thinking of the climax.

4. Into the Ring (also known as Memorials) (KBS2)

I didn’t even plan on watching this drama. I was channel surfing and saw Park Sung Hoon looking all depressed in the first episode and ran into Koo Se Ra. Girl was UNHINGED and determined to fight for her way.

Her motivation was initially on getting a stable pay check from being a district representative (it was only 60 million won which is like USD55k so it’s not that much) but she eventually became the district representative who fought for the benefit of the people and did not care for the political warfare that took place.

Came along Seo Gong Myung, a government officer in the local government office who was demoted from planning unit of the accounting department or something to be a secretariat to the district assembly. Seo Gong Myung sticks to his principle no matter what, which surprise surprise, is HATED by everyone in the district government.

Turns out our main leads were friends when they were kids so Se Ra kept teasing him and dragging him into her scheme of fighting for the people, which Gong Myung agreed to, not so much because he was a community-loving person, but because he was afraid Se Ra would get into trouble since she was as straight as a ruler.

Long story short, our leads fell for each other, and their relationship was HILAIROUS to watch. I think I speak for everyone who watched the drama that we had no reason to believe Se Ra did not peg Gong Myung for fun 😝😝

They were so cute together awwww

5. Kairos (MBC)

This is another drama that I stumbled into. Only this time, I saw Nam Gyu Ri and I remember seeing her ig post on a new drama so I decided to give it a go. She wrecked my heart in 49 Days so I decided to check this out for funsies. Hooo boy was I in for a major surprise.

The first two episodes got me hooketh!! I still cannot believe how the drama managed to keep me on my edge especially during the last 5 minutes of every episode. The pacing is even faster than Flower of Evil, and since this drama went back and forth between past and future, it keeps me guessing whether their efforts would bear fruit.

Will Kim “Sexy Brain” Seo Jin  and Han “I-Know-No-Fear” Ae Ri succeed in fighting the evil, who at this point in time remains unknown? I know Chairman Yoo Seo Il is currently being hinted as the culprit behind everything but I know better that he is just a puppet who sold his soul to the real devil who most likely is in the higher ranks in politics. I mean he even hinted at his remorse for what happened with Taejung Town 19 years prior. My suspicion is he is trying to cover up whatever happened because otherwise his own family would be at risk, so his only option is to redeem himself by doing something about the Taejung Town. I could be wrong, but regardless of who turns out to be the real villain in the story, I can say I am so satisfied by how the story has progressed so far.

The time paradox still hurts my brain, but I am choosing that this drama does not assume that time is linear.

There is still not enough people watching this drama and I’m begging you all to go and catch up before it ends in two weeks time.

6. More than Friends (JTBC)

A little trivia: I reblog most of the posts from @kdramastuff even if I am not watching the show at the point of reblogging the posts. I had been following her posts on this drama for 3 weeks, and I finally decided to marathon all 6 episodes and joined the watching party.

More than Friends was another drama that many people called a disappointment but I had a different opinion on it. Yes, I used to be the nerd who had different opinions on many things in high school sue me

The drama is premised on Kyung Woo Yeon who is said to have a crush on her high school friend, Lee Soo for 10 years. Lee Soo is nowhere near to be the perfect boyfriend material. He is selfish, does not care about other people’s feelings, and was always a lone ranger.

BUUUUUUT, Lee Soo seemed to show signs of care and affection (even though it was not at all for a normal person’s standard) for Woo Yeon. Surprisingly, he seemed to only do it for Woo Yeon and gave attention to Woo Yeon alone, even though he could practically pick and choose anyone he liked from the swarm of girls who were chasing him.

One day, he told Woo Yeon that he had to leave to the US to study, which made our girl sad. She decided to confess at the airport, but he outright turned her down, saying he only wanted to be friends with her. Over the time, they kept running into each other by coincidence (note: her name Woo Yeon is a wordplay on coincidence in Korean). Later, it was revealed that he wanted her to always be by his side, but he has built a wall as tall as the Great Wall of China before the idea of love so he didn’t realise what his true feeling for Woo Yeon was all along.

Woo Yeon, who felt sick of the ten-year crush, decided to end the “curse” and kissed him by the beach, thinking of getting a closure on her crush.

Long story short, Lee Soo finally realised his feeling for her and decided to confess, but by that time, a young, handsome, rich CEO of a conglomerate has entered into the picture. Cue the game of cat and mouse between Lee Soo and Woo Yeon about resentment, regret and relationship.

This drama was promoted as a romcom, but it feels more like a slice-of-life drama with a mix of melo and romcom in there. Seriously, I cried buckets watching this drama, not something you’d expect from a romcom. The dialogues were well-written, with each episode revolving around a specific theme. This was such a good drama coming from a rookie writer.

This drama did not have that many viewers to begin with, and many of those few people dropped it along the way, including the one who was responsible in getting me hooked into this drama :p  By the end of it, there were so few people talking about this drama in the tag (shout out to @dohyunsoo @have-yet-to-decide @starfire-s @thbn-anything​ for keeping me company to the very end of this drama)

This drama broke my record of screenshots per episode and total screenshots for any show. Until now, I have yet to finish posting them. I should probably upload more screenshots later tonight.

This drama had some AMAZING shots in the first half, with beautiful sceneries mostly in Seoul. It’s like what they said, “a daily occurrence for you, a trip for me”.

7. Oh My Baby (tvN)

I did not even remember watching this drama!! It was only after scrolling through my gallery that I saw I had shared some posts on my ig story about the drama.

It was in the middle of a lockdown when this drama aired and many of my memories from back then feel so distant to me.

The plot was not THAT good, but this drama is something you may consider if you like torturing yourself about the struggle of wanting to have a baby.

8. Once Again (KBS2)

Arguably one of the weekend family drama KBS2 in a while that kept me waiting for new episodes in front of my TV. Some people are turned off by weekend family drama because they tend to have slow pacing which makes viewers feel like they are being dragged to one of those boring corporate events that you would rather miss and wish you could be literally anywhere else.

Because this drama had more pairing than the typical weekend family drama, the story did take some time before it was on full momentum. It did feel like the drama could have been better with even one less sibling to worry about, but it was a fun watch in the middle of lockdown.

Will I watch it again? I’d rather rewatch House of Bluebird (starring Lee Joon Hyuk and Lee Sang Yeob as friends to enemies to friends again) because that drama spoke to me in a way that was more relatable. No hate to Once Again though. I just prefer House of Bluebird better.

Note: Justice for Song Ga Hee and her lovely son, Kim Ji Hoon. He had to grow up so much because of what happened to his mother, that it broke Ga Hee’s heart. And mine of course

9. Secret Forest 2 (tvN)

I watched Secret Forest once it has finished and I fell in love with the drama! Imagine my excitement when they announced Secret Forest 2 with my three main characters reprising their roles. No hate to Yoon Se Ah, I love her, but her screen time in Secret Forest was not enough to make me excited about her return. But I was pleased with her role in Secret Forest 2 and I hope if there is a third season, her character gets the redemption arc that she yearns for.

Secret Forest 2 was not as intense as the brilliant original, but I understood that it had to do with the overall theme of the season, and the theme required the script to be as such. Some people may argue me on this, but I still think what they pulled off was brilliant.

Too bad there was a severe lack of Lee Joon Hyuk on my screen though.

10. Tale of the Nine-Tailed (tvN)

Well. This drama went far beyond my expectation. The OTP was to die for. No such thing as miscommunication trope. This drama did not waste time on unnecessary drama. The pacing was incredibly fast, even faster than Kairos. Although to be fair, Kairos had to play with two different timelines and required time to establish the setting.

I’m sad about what happened to Lee Rang, but he did what he did, and he would never be able to erase that much pain from his memory even if the deities decided to be lenient on him because of his roles in killing off Imoogi. A fresh start as a human seemed like a fair reset to his life, and I hope he lives well, surrounded by people who love him.

I was never a fan of Jo Bo Ah (no hate on her, I was just indifferent) but this drama opened my eyes to what an incredible actress she is. I wish her a successful career ahead.

#365 repeat the year #365: repeat the year #do you like brahms #do you like brahms? #flower of evil #into the ring #kbs memorials #mbc kairos #more than friends #oh my baby #kbs once again #secret forest 2 #tale of the nine tailed #kdrama #kdrama review #kdrama opinion #personal #annual drama recap

[cauldronofmorning]

Okay so.... I've encountered your tags about "the talking scene between trapper and hawk in dr pierce and dr hyde the stuttering the grabbing the not blinking how another of hawk's coping methods has bitten the dust#trapper being soft parental but annoyed and how he needs to check out while hawkeye needs to save the entire world"... if you have time, Go off! I would love that 2000 word essay and your opinions.

It’s a bit of a mess and would probably get a C- if I handed it in, but! Dr Pierce and Dr Hyde and how it shows the difference between Hawkeye’s and Trapper’s coping methods.

Context! Alan Alda wrote the episode, mental health is important to him (not to psychoanalyze an actor, but he had depression before the show and his mom was schizophrenic) and there’s a quote on how Hawkeye didn’t actually change much in the eleven years, just had his coping methods beaten down.

So throughout season one, Hawkeye and Trapper have mostly been ignoring the trauma of a war. Hawkeye naturally ended a movie with a speech about propaganda (Yankee Doodle Doctor) and Tommy tells them (Sometimes You Hear The Bullet) about a kid who should have been the blonde hero in a war movie actually dying and not hearing a bullet, forcing them to actually quietly think about it. But for the most part, they can distract themselves with booze, pranks and women, and Hawkeye can still draw a straight line between his tenuous sanity pre-war and the place he’s in.

There’s also two important episodes in season two before Dr Pierce and Dr Hyde, that make the war more personal for both of them. The first is Radar’s Report, where a scared prisoner contaminates Trapper’s patient by knocking the blood over. Trapper’s sulkier throughout the episode, obsessed with how it could have been okay if it weren’t for that incident, and less indulging of Hawkeye’s girl of the week problem. His patient doesn’t make it, and he makes a beeline to the POW’s tent, maybe would have killed him if Hawkeye hadn’t bought him back to reality. “That’s not what we’re about.”

The second is For The Good Of The Outfit. This one has a village bombed by American military and Hawkeye/Trapper run afoul of previously decent sounding generals trying to shut them up from talking about it, including passive aggressive threats to send them to the front, and specifically to Hawkeye, intercepting letters to his dad. It’s okay by the end of the episode, but he’s still livid when he finds this out.

In comes Dr Pierce and Dr Hyde. The episode starts with Hawkeye already slightly dissociated from a long shift, thinking it hasn’t ended, and Trapper having to gently take him by the arm and guiding him out of the OR, telling him he was taking the chest cases “like he was their only hope”. Hawkeye wanting to save everyone keeps popping up throughout the episode; here, when he’s stumbling into Henry and his ego filtered through deprivation making him think he’s the only one who can do chest cases, the scene I’m getting to, and the end where Trapper and Henry sum him up.

As much as Trapper is “let’s get drunk to deal, okay?” kind of comfort in comparison to BJ who can actually talk about emotions, if not necessarily knowing the best way to deal with them (Hawkeye has a type and it’s repressed blondes), he’s soft with Hawkeye – gentle touches, firmly telling him to go to sleep, indulging that chopper noise is just thunder – until he figures the best way to get his friend to rest is to sedate him behind his back.

The thing with Trapper is that while he might be a bad husband, cheating on his wife with no shame (but he keeps bringing up that Hawkeye is more perverted so that might make it easier for him to deal with, see the couple of times he glares at Hawk for flirting with Henry/a male patient, Divided We Stand, The Trial Of Henry Blake, Check Up, Life With Father, Adam’s Ribs), he’s a good father who ran into a minefield for Kim and tried to go AWOL for Cathy and Becky. That’s not to say he always treats Hawkeye like a child, that would be weird considering how much flirting they do, but when the other man is manic or badly affected, Trapper’s first instinct is to be parental.

After Hawkeye in his doubletalky way admits to Radar he’s compulsive and psychotic (sidenote:  his symptoms of strong emotions, not being able to think clearly and too many spirals to name actually bear that diagnosis out, instead of just using the word when one thinks another is behaving badly), he wanders around the camp like a ghost, making notes about corpsmen with guns and nurses checking patients in post-op.

As Hawkeye often does, whenever he finds something out, or thinks he has in this instance, he has to tell his live-in boyfriend of the season immediately, and if he can’t sleep then neither can anyone else. He sits on Trapper’s bed, extremely close and not blinking, and jostles him awake. Already Trapper’s slightly panicky, as no matter what he says about being the mellow one, any time there’s shouting or loud noise in the swamp, he always wakes up with a start. Even when he sees it’s Hawkeye it takes him a few seconds to process and get back into his role.

Hawkeye’s very sad and very quiet. For the past seven minutes, even though he’s dissociated, exhausted and not doing well, he’s still trying to do his normal thing of turning his anger sideways and being snarky or being a clown bottom for the gaggle of nurses. Going back to one of Trapper’s good qualities is that he’s a decent parent, Hawkeye can regress emotionally into being like a ten year old (incidentally, the age when he had the most trauma pre-Korea, with Billy, his mom dying, guilt over not wanting dad to remarry and at some point losing his virginity), both for funny like in Picture This and for sadness.

So he’s finally noticed that he’s in a war zone and he’s too tired to make jokes about it or distract himself from it. Trapper already sounds frustrated but still listens, telling him to go bed before he drives himself crazy. There’s been a few takes that Trapper would get sick of later Hawkeye, and given how much they really can’t talk to each other that often, even just a mention of Hawkeye’s will when he has to go to the front makes Trapper shut down and Hawkeye cover with a joke, that’s probably true. They’re both messes, but for now Trapper can give Hawkeye someone to lean on.

“If I thought I could stop it just by going to sleep, don’t you think I would try?” Hawkeye does a twitch of the head, still unblinking, and that’s just really asking Trapper to understand and take him seriously. Also the wording, he’s not saying he can stop thinking about it just by going to sleep, or stop feeling anything just by closing his eyes, although both of those are implied. He makes it very clear later on (Letters, Preventive Medicine, Blood Brothers) that he feels like he’s as bad as the war – god and martyr complex combined – and if he can’t fight against/blame everything on that then it’s time for some self loathing.

Trapper does actually pay attention and gives him some advice. Definitely not great advice, but advice nonetheless, to close his eyes when things get unbearable, and to keep checking out when it keeps happening. This can’t work for Hawkeye, who’s had a guilt complex ever since he was a child, but it’s how Trapper copes. The next episode when Kim’s mother turns up for the boy, after a time of being actually open, he goes right to dismissive snark. Plus in season three’s Mad Dogs and Servicemen, another one on how differently Trapper and Hawkeye deal with things, he shrugs that he pretends he’s not there all day along.

Hawkeye’s stuttering a bit at this point. Words are important to him, it’s why you should probably leave him a note even if you’re a man who 1) wants to forget about Korea as soon as he arrives in Boston but won’t 2) wants desperately to believe he’s straight but isn’t 3) cares through physical touch and can’t think of what to say for seventy two hours. Wordplay is important to him too, and he admits to Sidney in the finale that his brain thinks too fast. Obviously exhaustion is going to put his brain and mouth out of sync, and considering how he sounds like he’s going to cry in the mess tent when he can’t even get words out to Frank Burns, it makes him all that more helpless.

“Somebody, and it wasn’t you or me, started this war.” It’s the “whoever the them, we were always us” of it all. It’ll be more important in the third season, and what happens in Welcome To Korea, but Hawkeye has taken it for granted that he and Trapper will stay co-dependent no matter what happens or who they come up against or how their time is running out. Much how he probably didn’t tell Trapper about the abandonment trauma he’s suffered before, Trapper always reassures him to come back soon, or no charge for leaning on him, or it isn’t a Christmas goodbye, and doesn’t want to share real feelings.

Beyond that scene, with Hawkeye dragging himself off to be a hero, assume that everyone who tries to take care of him really just wants to sleep with him, and cry while singing, Trapper tries to sedate him while he’s not looking. He’s tried being parental, he’s tried the repression advice, it’s time to be passive aggressive for Hawkeye’s own good. Or what he thinks is Hawkeye’s own good. It’s not especially great on Trapper’s part, but a similar thing happens reversed in Mail Call, where a drunk Trapper tries to go AWOL and as soon as he’s distracted laughing at Frank, Hawkeye locks his bag away so Trapper won’t be tempted again. Both of them are repressed messes who can’t really talk to each other.

When that sedation attempt ends up in Frank falling over, Trapper goes to Henry to be the worried macho boyfriend. Like with the only comedic dancing allowed and not the time in Officers Only when a genuine offer gets turned down, being protective over Hawkeye where he can hear can only happen when it’s for fun/likely no real danger.

At the end, Trapper and Henry sit by Hawkeye’s bed when he’s finally asleep and talk about him. Kindly, but they know he’s unstable with a hero complex. Like Mulcahy said in season eleven, the camp has a lot of experience with not dealing with reality, and even Trapper says in Iron Guts Kelly that one man’s reality is another man’s fantasy. Nobody has the capability to talk about this yet, and Sidney and Hawkeye only really become friends in O.R. Hawkeye will wake up and he and Trapper will pretend this never happened.

When Adam’s Ribs comes around, and Hawkeye has a manic episode over needing to eat something that isn’t liver or fish, Trapper and Henry are again the ones looking after him, comparing him to their kids and Trapper in the background both snarking over Hawkeye’s slippage in sanity and looking out for him. It’s not as quite high stakes as Dr Pierce and Dr Hyde, but they’re still worried about him.

To end this out, Trapper and Hawkeye and mental health is a fun thing to look at. Neither of them are particularly emotionally intelligent yet, Hawkeye just kind of a self absorbed mess and Trapper finding it easier to be a reassuring rock and keep his own struggling to himself, and they keep things from each other while also taking past each other, but they comfort each other with jokes and distractions that only they can understand. The repressed clowns are trying, even if it does all end with a borrowed kiss and only just barely missing each other.

#hawkeye pierce #trapper john mcintyre #mental health tw #dr pierce and dr hyde #mash #piercintyre #gene-ious

[seiin-translations]

2.43 S1 Chapter 1.1: Young Yunichika

1. FIRST TOUCH

For this whole series, just imagine that everyone except Haijima is talking in dialect

Translation Notes

1. Itoko (従姉妹) is the Japanese word for cousin, so Kuroba’s itoko is Itoko, it’s a pun

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Continuing to fall almost nonstop since New Years’ Eve, the snow completely buried the school building right after winter break. It was just like a drifting classroom isolated in the gaps of space-time. The window glass that was pure-white with condensation cut off any connection to the outside world, and the air warmed by the stove amassed in the classroom without circulating. Steam rose gently from the brass basin that was placed on the stovetop, and the air near the ceiling appeared to flicker.

The old school building seemed to be creaking under the weight of the snow, and he was afraid that it was going to collapse, but it had held up every year without any problems. If only somewhere else in the school—like around the principal’s office—had been crushed flat, the talks of renovation would have proceeded quickly.

I mean, Grandpa can just make a donation. Should I try asking him seriously this time?

He thought that for a moment, but there was no doubt that he would have graduated by the time the new school building was completed, so that was a little silly. The middle school in the neighboring Suzumu City, which he had visited before at a town exchange event, was a new, clean, and sturdy reinforced concrete building, and the entire building was warm even though there were no kerosene heaters to be seen anywhere. He received a culture shock when he learned that the toilets were not cold.

I wanna be in high school soon, he thought vaguely. Since there were no high schools in town, you would have to go to Suzumu City for the closest one. However, the one year and three months until graduation was a length that could be called an eternity.

Fourteen years old. He had finally just started the third semester of his second year of middle school.

“The transfer student’s late, isn’t he?”

After performing the penance of opening ceremony in the frigid gym, Kuroba Itoko said and she hung her behind on the edge of his desk during the strangely slow waiting time after they returned to the classroom. “Heave ho,” she said as she wriggled her butt back to put her thighs on his desk, so Kuroba Yuni reflexively removed his chin resting in his hands on the desk and leaned back. This is just a bit embarrassing, oi… Even if all the female middle and high school students in the city did it, it was hard to understand why so many girls were shortening their skirts when the circumstances in this snowy country was different.

Itoko’s class was Class 2 next door, but she often made trips to Class 1. From entry to elementary school to middle school graduation, the faces in each grade didn’t change fundamentally, so everyone knew each other even though the classes were different. She seemed to have gotten some kind of information from the group of Class 1 girls who were still talking at the doorway even now.

That was right, a transfer student was arriving. There was no small amount of excitement in the air in Class 2-1 for the big event of the new semester, which was rarely encountered. It was a depopulating town where the number of people in school decreased, but rarely increased. What was more, apparently the transfer student was coming from Tokyo, so the expectations were high no matter what.

“I wonder if he’ll be cute. I hope he’ll be cute.”

“He has a normal face. Maybe a bit below normal.”

“You knew him until you guys were in senior kindergarten, right? He might have gotten cute.”

“I’m telling you, he didn’t. He’s going to be a pipsqueak with glasses who’s bad at sports. He became a wuss who’d get scared by this amount of snow...”

“What’s with you, are you sulking? You really are a little kid…”

“Shut up. I told you stop acting like you’re my big sister. The teacher’s coming soon so get back to your own class.”

As soon as he told her to stop, Itoko said, “Yes, yes, what a hopeless kid” with the utmost superior look on her face, shrugged her shoulders and jumped down from the table. Her short skirt fluttered lightly.

“I’m wearing underpants, so there’s no use peeking.”

“Did you make knitted panties? So ugly. I don’t get why you try so hard to look like that.”

“Being stylish is all about grit.”

Brushing aside the unintentional insult that rushed out of his mouth, Itoko slipped through the gaps between the messily aligned desks. Since she didn’t deny the knitted panties, did that mean that was true?

Kuroba Yuni and Kuroba Itoko had the same family name, but they were not siblings. It either made it confusingly similar or easy to understand, but…Itoko was his cousin. (1) They had the same grandfather and their fathers were brothers. She always acted like his older sister, but they were the same age, and since Kuroba was born in September and Itoko was born in October, he wanted to assert the fact that he was the one who was older.

She turned her miffed face away and rested her chin in her hands again. Kuroba’s seat was at very back by the window—until today. When he came to school today, a brand new desk and chair was brought in behind him.

He wiped the condensation on the window with his palm. Even when he cleared away the white film, all you could see beyond it was a blanket of white snow. The snow had stopped for now, but heavy snow clouds remained in the sky, and it wouldn’t be unusual if it started snowing some time again. There was a narrow path created from the school gate to the building sandwiched between walls of snow, but since the snow removal operation in the early morning, it had gotten buried again by the continuing snow.

He squinted outside the window to see if there was anything visible in the white. He was a slow and clumsy kid, so I hope he didn’t get stuck buried in the snow or something…

The truth was, Kuroba took pride in the fact that he was looking forward to the transfer student more than anyone else, a hundred or a thousand times more than Itoko or his classmates. Even though he was supposed to have finished moving house during winter break, he showed no indication of coming over to his house to show his face, so he was just a little frustrated about that and his excitement went down. They parted with each other in senior kindergarten, so it had been eight years. He wondered if he had been thoroughly steeped in Tokyo and forgot about this place.

Although, it wasn’t as if Kuroba remembered a lot either. He could remember meaningless episodes like what he did to get injured or what he did to get scolded, but as soon as he tried to systematically trace his memories, they became hazy. Like a snow scene that became misty with a glass that was already clouding over again—

In the midst of the white, he could see a flicker of something black moving.

Surprised, he half-rose to his feet and pasted himself to the window. There were two figures walking in the gorge between the walls of snow that seemed like they could collapse at any minute.

“…He’s here!”

He unintentionally exclaimed, and the miscellaneous chatter that filled the classroom quickly faded. There was a beat, and then shouts of joy rose. His more than thirty classmates surged towards the window and lined their faces.

The smaller figure, dressed in a stocky blouson down coat, was an old lady when he looked closer. So that means the other, bigger figure was…? Wait, how can he be that big…He was confused for a moment because he didn’t match his image of that kindergarten kid.

However, as soon as he strained his eyes and looked into his face, a warm-colored lantern lit up the snowy landscape of his white hazy memory, and a fresh image appeared in his mind.

“I’ll never forget you, Yuni… But, goodbye…”

Certainly, there was the face of a crying kindergartener who came to say goodbye to him while sobbing eight years ago. His pale face was drenched with tears, and even his glasses were wet. No matter how much he wiped them with his hands, large drops of tears continued to run down his cheeks, so much that he was worried that he was going to squeeze all the water out of his body.

That’s right, the glasses. He was already wearing glasses in kindergarten, and that might have helped giving him an introverted and quiet impression. Glasses and short and bad at sports. That was exactly his impression at that time. Once he remembered one thing, the vivid parts increased one after the other. One lantern lit a new lantern, and it became brighter and brighter.

Immediately, he stopped caring about how he didn’t come to see him over winter break or any of those small grievances. With impatient hands, he unfastened the screw lock on the window frame and threw open the window. The cold wind blew in and his classmates reproached him with “It’s so cold—“, but everyone’s voices bounced off him. Fine snowflakes blown up together with the wind struck his face. He shook his head and brushed away the snow.

“Chika!”

He leaned so far out the window that it looked like he was about to fall down and raised his voice.

The figure stopped and looked up. His eyes met his through thin-framed glasses. How will he react at first? His heart was beating fast from the anticipation.

He just reacted in such an indifferent way, like he just happened to exchange lines of sight with a stranger. He moved his face down without changing expression and disappeared into the shade of the eaves of the school entrance. The old lady who was left behind bowed slightly like she was troubled and followed after him, her snow boots making crunching noises.

Huh…? Did he…forget me?

Feeling let down, Kuroba stood stock still near the window. The two footprints that continued from the school gate were swept away by the white snow-mixed wind as the hanging lanterns that lit his memories went out with a puff.

⋆﹥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━﹤⋆

“Haijima Kimichika-kun came from Tokyo. It seems that his grandfather’s house is in town, and he lived in Suzumu City until kindergarten. Perhaps some of you might know him.”

The gazes of everyone in the class was focused on the gangly school uniform standing at the teacher’s podium. How tall is he, it looks like he’s about the same as me? Kuroba thought absentmindedly as he stared at the small tip on the first stroke of “Hai” from the family name that was written vertically on the blackboard by the homeroom teacher. From among the three past elements of glasses, being tiny, and bad at sports, the glasses remained and pipsqueak disappeared. The remaining unknown was his motor skills.

He had a pale, smooth face and a rather neat set of features. If he had to decide between strong or weak, he would say they were weak. Depending on how you looked at it, they might look reptilian. At the very least, the characteristics of an idol-like pretty boy that Itoko had sweetly hoped for were nonexistent. To be frank, he seemed unfriendly. He still hadn’t smiled even once since he entered the classroom. He didn’t even try to look around at his classmates’ faces, just pursing his lips together and staring at his feet. Hmm, shyness?

“Kuroba-kun.”

Suddenly called on by the teacher, he made a stupid “Yeah?” sound.

“Haijima-kun played volleyball in his last school, so he will be joining the volleyball team. Please teach him about the team activities. Also, Haijima-kun’s eyesight is not good, but as you can see, he is tall, so you will move a seat behind. He will be the second from the back by the window.

Still without saying a word or even making a sound, Hajima nodded, took his bag and descended from the podium. Everyone’s interested gazes moved with his movements. As he turned twice at right angles and walked over to him without hesitation, Kuroba hurriedly got up as though to jump out of the way, and he put his bag on Kuroba’s seat with a thump before sitting down.

“Oh,” When Kuroba started to talk to him,

“…?”

He glared at him with a sideways glance, looking suspicious. What he placed on his desk was a somewhat stylish dark red backpack that looked like something from a school in the city, and had a somewhat stylish, unfamiliar school emblem embroidered on it.  

“No…it’s fine.”

Kuroba took the seat behind his, thinking, Well, if he’s fine with it, then I guess it’s okay. Unlike his desk, which had scribbles carved all over it with a cutter, the desk prepared for Haijima was still brand new, the surface shining brightly.

“Hey, how tall are you? You’re seventy, right?”

He leaned over the desk, poked the back before him and started talking to him. Kuroba was 173 centimeters. He had heard that the average height for second-year middle school boys was around 160, so he was on the considerably tall side.

Haijima turned around, looking like he couldn’t be bothered. His narrow eyes glared at him again. A gaze where you couldn’t feel anything like charm or friendliness at all, as if all the temperature was absorbed while passing through the thin lens of his glasses.

“Your position?”

That was the first sound he made since entering the classroom. Similar to his eyes, the way he spoke made you wonder if he had thrown away all his charm and friendliness at a station on the express train ride here from Tokyo. His voice finished changing…maybe? He had a low voice that carried well. It was just a bit frustrating.

“On the volleyball team?”

Haijima raised his eyebrows and repeated his words when Kuroba was just staring at him vacantly. Huh? His intonation felt strange. He was speaking in standard Japanese. Has it always been that way? It shouldn’t be like that, though.

“Oh, oooh, that’s what you meant by position?” This guy talked in a way that lopped off the context before and after his words. “Well, let’s see, I feel like we didn’t really decide them…”

“You didn’t decide? What do you do in matches?”

“Matches? Ah…”

He hadn’t heard that word in a long time. After gaping like it was someone else’s problem,

“We’ve never been in a proper match. It’s a club of guys who only belong to it in name only, and the practice days are whenever. Look, you have to join a club here. Don’t you know that?”

An expression that actually looked like an expression appeared on Haijima’s face, it looked like. Though it was only slightly, his narrow eyes widened—is this shock? And then his eyes suddenly lowered, his mouth turning down at the corners. Is this sadness?

“Oh, was your old school really strong?”

Crap, I might make him cry. He didn’t really understand, but he felt that he said something wrong, and when he panickily tried to stay on topic,

“Tch…”

He heard that. No way, did he click his tongue just now?

“So you’re just uselessly big?”

He heard a sudden, unbelievable insult from the mouth of the transfer student, who one would think would be generally burning with the desire to build good relationships with the people at his new school. With that, Haijima abruptly faced forward and started emitting an aura of “Don’t ever talk to me” from his back. Kuroba could do nothing but stare at that amazingly obstinate back with his mouth wide open.

“I’ll never forget you, Yuni… But, goodbye…”

Which station did you lose the “Chika” from eight years ago who was sobbing because he didn’t want to say goodbye?

Previous || Index || Next

#2.43: seiin koukou danshi volley-bu #2.43 translation #2.43 book 1

[emmy-writes-sometimes]

Lullabies

A bad mission leaves you unable to sleep. Luckily, you’re not the only one awake in the compound.

-

           “Alright, I’m out!” You said loudly, standing up from the couch. The others in the room, Nat, Clint, and Wanda, were all arguing over an episode of Forensic Files. They all acknowledged you as you stood up. Tonight was their intervention, after all. It was the first time you’d been social since the big mission incident happened.

           “Promise me you’ll sleep tonight!” Nat called out. You walked into the kitchen, not expecting to see Steve filling up his gigantic water bottle. He was a friend, a good one, but you hadn’t spoken much since it happened. You just felt like you let him down, and it was the last thing you wanted to do.

           You’d been on your own until Tony, your dad’s best friend from childhood, took you in, gave you a serum when your heart threatened to be the cause of your death, and gave you a kickass suit to go with it. And then you were almost an Avenger, but not quite. You were grateful, really – it gave you some of the best friends you’d ever had. Nat was like a mom to you, and Tony was the closest thing you had to a father. You’d been there for six months until the dreaded mission last week.

           You’d been the only survivor out of your team of five. You’d been tortured, in every way possible. You were so shaken up that you barely slept for the past week. The bruises weren’t fading. Neither were the memories, and it left you completely unable to sleep, much less do anything but lay in bed and feel guilty for surviving. Nat had finally drawn you out of your room with Chinese food and everyone else had joined until you were all arguing over the ICBY murders.

           “Good night, Y/n,” Steve said with a little smile. His smiles were always warm. He was sweet – you considered him a friend, even though most of your conversations were light-hearted.

           “Good night, Steve,” you replied with a smile. You walked into your room and got in bed. And you tried to sleep. This time, for whatever reason, it came. Maybe it was because you could hear everyone else in the living room and it was comforting. It helped you to understand that you weren’t alone anymore.

           Sleep paralysis had been taking over every time you closed your eyes, and this time was no exception. Tonight it was the bad guy, staring down at you with a gun in one hand and gauntlet in the other. And you tried to scream for anyone who was awake still, it was so real and you couldn’t move your body, but nobody came. Maybe it was because it was late. Maybe it was because you weren’t really screaming, but you couldn’t take it. You woke up gasping, your throat sore, tears streaming down your face. It felt like you were being strangled again. You turned your body toward the air conditioner to get a clear breath.

           “Shit,” you murmured. It was 2:26 AM. You felt like you were suffocating, and without even taking your phone, you slipped out of your room and let it lock behind you. The hallway was dark, the only lights coming from the floor-to ceiling windowed view of the city, and it was calming. It was cool, too, Tony always kept the building freezing cold. One of the back lights in the kitchen was on, and you sighed. There was only one thing that could make you feel better. When you were a kid your mother always made chocolate chip cookies when you were upset. She’d hand them over to you, warm and gooey, and you would eat as many as you could until it knocked you out.

           So you got a pan out as quietly as you could and searched in the fridge until you found your secret stash of cookies. You resisted to eat the dough and set them on the pan, heating the oven and setting them in. You always took them out before they were done anyway, so it didn’t matter.

           “FRIDAY, play the Office in the living room and set a timer for cookies.” The corner of the room glowed in response.

           “Hey!” A familiar New York accent knocked you out of your daze as you heard the theme song start playing. It was Steve. You quickly ran in.

           “I’m sorry!” You exclaimed. “I had no idea anyone was in here, I thought everyone was asleep.” He was half asleep, still, but he smiled.

           “I did too,” he answered dryly.

           “No, I’m sorry. What were you watching?” You took a seat on the couch, all the way across from Steve.

           “Honestly? 60 Minutes.” You let out a laugh.

           “Of course you would, old man.”

           “I’m not that old.”

           “You’re a hundred years old.”

           “I’m not!” He tried to say. But he sighed. “What are we watching?”

           “The Office. Everyone in my generation thinks it’s comedic gold. I do, too. It makes me feel better when sleep paralysis wakes me up.” You were freezing. You wish you had taken a blanket with you, or grabbed the one that was sitting by Steve. Steve could see that you were cold, too. He could see the chill bumps on your skin in the dark. He could see the dried tears on your face and decided he should probably have a little more conversation with you before bringing that up.

           “So, uh, what’s it about?”

           “An office.” Steve chuckled at how dumb he was.

           “Yeah, I should’ve realized that.”

           “It’s about a paper company. You might hate it. It’s weird humor, honestly.”

           “Yeah, well, I might like it too.” He grinned. Whenever he did that, you couldn’t help but do the same. It was contagious. His optimism, even after everything, and his faith in the world made you want to be more like him. And he and Bucky were the only ones who could possibly know what you went through with the serum. Not to mention he was gorgeous. He had the perfect hair, perfect teeth. He was twice your size and for some reason you wanted him to crush you. He was a giant teddy bear. He was a sweetheart, but he always said what was on his mind. He wouldn’t lie to you. He had no reason to.

           “Y/n,” FRIDAY caught your attention, “your cookies are almost done.” You jumped a little bit. Steve must have noticed how jumpy you were, and it made him a little upset. Why didn’t you feel safe?

           “Cookies?” He asked. You got up – the oven had an auto shut-off for when they were done, and by the time you got over there you just grabbed a random dish towel to take them out of the oven with. You slid them onto a paper plate, took paper towels as napkins, and brought them back to the living room.

           “Did you wake up in the middle of the night to make cookies?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. He sat up slightly, motioning for you to sit beside him. You were a little nervous, just because he was him, even though you’d done it in countless meetings or when everyone was piled into the room. But this was different. You were alone.

           “No,” you admitted. “My mom used to make them whenever I woke up in the middle of the night. I used to have really bad nightmares.”

           “Did, or still do?” It slipped out of his mouth before he knew what he was saying. “Sorry.” You took a cookie from the plate and started eating. They were the most comfort you had in a long time. Or maybe it was Steve, or a mix of both.

           “Still do. I just can’t go back to sleep after,” you answered. “You can have one.” He smiled and took one from the top of the plate.

           “I can’t either. Back before I went into the ice they never really had a word for how you felt when you’d come back from war or a car accident or anything you felt like you shouldn’t survive. Now they do, and it’s almost as bad as not having a word at all.”

           “I’m used to it now. It just makes me mad that it affected me this much.”

           “Yeah, it does me too. But you know, kid, my door’s always open. You can always come talk to me. I get it.”

           “We’re talking now, aren’t we?” You eyed the blanket. Even with the warm cookies you were eating, you still felt cold. “Can you hand me the blanket?”

           “Yeah, of course.” He passed you the fluffy blue blanket that you were pretty sure Clint had brought in and never taken back. You wrapped it over yourself, leaning back on the couch. “I don’t know what you went through back there, but…”

           “I haven’t even told Tony. The only people that know are me and Fury and Nat.” Steve nodded, looking down.

           “Why not?”

           “Because that makes it feel real.” Thinking about that night just made your skin crawl and it made you almost start crying. “Everyone wants to know and if I tell them then they’ll just feel sorry for me. I set myself up for that, for all of this. I told them I could handle it, but…”

           “You’re handling it,” he interrupted. “Trust me. TV and cookies is way better than the way I used to handle things.” You sighed.

           “I’m sorry I’m dumping on you. And I changed your TV. You probably came out here to be alone and I just…”

            “Shut up, Y/n. I like spending time with you. And I like that you brought me cookies when you didn’t have to share them. I’m glad I’m not the only one awake in the middle of the night.” You felt a little better. He wouldn’t lie to you. He wasn’t like that. What you wanted, more than anything, was just to curl up next to him. You needed human contact and suddenly you needed him. You realized that you didn’t feel safe because of the cookies or the TV. You felt safe because Steve was there.

           “Do you come out here every night?” You asked, trying to change the subject a little.

           “Pretty much. Sometimes I’ll go to the gym. But sitting here feels much better than punching things. Sitting with you, I should say.” He gave you a small smile, hoping that it would be returned.

           “You’re lying.”

           “No. I’m not. Can I tell you somethin’?” You nodded. “When they said there was only one survivor, I was hoping it was you. Not that I wanted everyone to die, I just… I couldn’t take seeing you, dead, because you don’t deserve that. And I didn’t want to not get the chance to tell you how I feel about you. Even if it is kinda stupid.”

           “What do you mean?” You couldn’t see very much in the darkness of the room, since the credits were playing, but you could see a faint look of something in his eyes that reminded you of home.

           “I mean I care about you. More than I should. It’s dangerous, I know that. It can get you killed, I know that. I don’t expect anything in return, especially not from you, but… I really like you. You’re smart and funny and you’re so good at what you do, even when it doesn’t look like it.”

           You sat up, throwing the blanket aside, and walked over to him. You were so close to him that you could smell his breath. Cookies. You wrapped your arms around him, nearly bursting into tears because of the sheer amount of time you’d gone without anyone saying they cared about you. You were happy because somebody cared about you this much.

           “I like you too,” you said. He hugged you tightly, so tightly that you thought you might burst even though you had the same amount of strength as he did. He rubbed your back up and down for a minute, sighing against you, and ran a hand through your hair.

          “I’m not worth cryin’ over, doll,” he pointed out.

           “I’m a crybaby.” He laughed softly. It was as warm and comforting and safe as the chocolate chip cookies you’d made. You finally let him go, even though it was only to cuddle up against him. You offered some of the blanket to him and he took it, leaning down. He eventually moved until you were right beside him, holding you so you wouldn’t fall off the couch.

           “So what do you say we get some coffee tomorrow morning?” He asked.

           “I’d like that.”

           “Good.” You must have fallen asleep with him, because you woke up the next morning in the same place, muscles sore, and the blanket had been kicked off of you. He woke up at the same time and just smiled down at you.

           “I should probably go take a shower. If you still want coffee, that is,” you said.

           “Yeah. I’ll meet you back here in an hour.” You pulled yourself away from him, standing up, and sighed. “I’ll put the cookies up, don’t worry about it.”

           “Thank you,” you responded. He smiled at you and started cleaning up the couch area. You walked into the hallway, about to head to your room, but lo and behold, Wanda was standing there with a grin on her face. “What?”

           “You spent the night with Steve. Didn’t you?” She asked.

           “Not like that. We just both fell asleep. And now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to get ready for our date.”

           “You’re dating?”

           “Shh, not yet, just… We talked most of the night.” She smiled.

           “He’ll be good for you.” You scoffed and typed the code into the pad to get into your room. Once you did a fingerprint scan, the door flew open. You certainly hoped he would be good for you, because last night was the first time you’d slept in what felt like forever. He was a better lullaby than the chocolate chip cookies, that was for sure. 

A/N: I hope you like this! I loved writing it. 

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers fluff

[magenta-llama]

Avengers Assemble Season 1: the stoniest

List: 

ep. 1-2 “The Avengers Protocol”

ep. 6  “Super Adaptoid”

ep. 13 “In Deep”

ep. 17 “Savages”

ep. 25 “Exodus”

ep. 26 “The Final Showdown”

Episodes 1-2: The Avengers Protocol

"You lead. I'll follow." (Steve Rogers)

What can I say, the show is gay from the start. Like, Tony is missing his team so much that he stalks them over his morning coffee on a daily basis. And yeah, sure, he stalks all of them and Steve is the last one he gets to, but come on, this show is so transparent (thank you, whoever made it this way. You make my life better every day. I love you.) And like, idk, I, personally, often leave the thing I am truly interested in to be the last one as well. Like, you never start with what worries you most when you don’t want to look suspicious.  And excuse me, what exactly was Red Skull’s “So Iron Man has a heart after all” about? I MEAN, AFTER IT LOOKS LIKE HE KILLS STEVE AND TONY GOES “NOOOOO” AND GETS KINDA ANGRY? Really, I think he is the biggest Stony shipper of the show (after Clint maybe).  And then again, “So you left the rest of your team behind - for me?” (Not that he doesn’t have a point, because the moment Tony sees Cap’s signature? He forgets everything). I tell you, he has an ao3 account, and he posts stony fics every night when MODOK is not around.

And the moment Tony frees Cap-Skull? He just wouldn't stop TALKING because he'd MISSED Steve so much TT 

Then goes part 2 - yep, the one with Steve’s “show-off” face. 

Like, he is biting his lip right there, I don’t take criticism.  He literally offers his body to Tony Stark at the very beginning of the show.

And Steve carrying Tony around in his arms? (Steve carrying Tony is a thing of this show in general - no matter whose hands are free, no matter the fact that Thor and Hulk are stronger than Steve and can move faster than him while carrying heavy stuff, Steve never lets anyone else carry his Tony. Ever.) The tender looks and shiny smiles Steve gives him? The non-stop flirting? I mean, if "Careful. Keep leading like that and we might actually stick together." was not a Captain America pick-up line I don't know what is. 

And the way Steve and Tony are right by each other's side, all the time, they just can't bear being farther than 1 meter's distance from each other. 

Do they have to be so close? There's plenty of space in Tony's house! And given that Tony was the first to turn and walk down it looks like Steve just ran after him to stick close again. 

Episode 6: Super Adaptoid

"There are a few old-fashioned things worth keeping around." (Tony Stark)

This one is just my favourite. I think I've rewatched it at least four times already. This whole trope with Tony's Modern Tech vs Steve's Old Fashioned Gut, learning to actually listen to each other and becoming closer in the end? Love it.   The way they just outright flirt and fool around from the first minute of the show? The way Tony is genuinely worried about Steve being hurt and tries to make him wear armour?

I personally find the whole concept of Tony making a suit for Steve really hot. And yes, it's always Steve. Not Clint or Natasha, who don't even have super strength. Just Steve. Tony wants to protect him so, so badly I want to cry.

I also love how Tony and Steve sit a bit apart from the others on their way home. Like, alright, Tony's piloting the jet (which actually JARVIS can do) but what is Steve doing? Just sitting there by his side and what, watching him? What had he been doing before he asked about the readings? He just likes spending time with Tony so, so much. I tell you, the only reason Cap wasn't sitting on his lap at that moment was that it's a kids' show. 

And Steve “never missing an issue” of Futura? That magazine with Tony on the cover? No, I can respect that he can just have interests of his own, but I like to think that he reads things like that to understand his boyfriend better. Or maybe impress him, who knows. He did impress him in the end :3

Also, why does Cap know how to use Iron Man's gauntlet? It didn't take him long to figure it out. Well, I actually made a fanart on that one, you can find it by “my art” or “stony” tag, I don’t know which one helps, tumblr messes with the tag search all the time.

And of course, the last scene. Oh, that last scene. That peaceful walk down the corridor while Tony's drying his hair. I have so many questions about that one scene. Like, what, were they taking a shower together? Were they going to spar? But then why do they take a shower before that..? But I've already written a post about that one, too.

Episode 13: In Deep

“So are you pals gonna hug now or what?" (Clint Barton)

The stoniest episode of the season. Possibly, of the whole show. Like, the whole episode is entirely stony. Undercover mission while gazing tenderly into each other's eyes? Trying to play bad guys, but keeping flirting and looking after each other's backs all the time? Really, the whole episode is just Steve and Tony being:

Yeah, I made a post about that one, too.

The "Tony's not following Steve's plan and Steve's pissed but in the end, they steal each other’s moves" trope? The "I know you're enjoying the role-playing thing"? I mean, how does he know Tony’s enjoying ‘the role-playing thing’? Oh, we all know how.  And Steve telling Tony how amazing he is? @tonysbubblebutt​ has already made a post about this, too. And COME ON, "Step 3 - we enjoy the view"? ENJOY THE VIEW, STEVE? REALLY?

(The view:)

Also, Tony's face when Steve hit him. For a moment, he really thought his babe was gonna hurt him, omg. 

And I like how everything is censored and yet so obvious. Like Tony putting a photo of his butt into the armour, but in pants - because kids'  show. Or Steve saying "billionaire, genius" and then trailing off - because kids' show. And Clint’s "So are you pals gonna HUG now or what?”  I mean, really?

Episode 17: Savages

"You know me, and I know Tony" (Steve Rogers)

The Camping! trope episode. Seriously, I've come up with at least three fanfiction ideas while watching this one. 

The first thing you should understand is that Tony and Steve had had a very good morning sex before the events. Or maybe not that good, because Tony just kept throwing Steve around the room and tried to make him “test drive his next invention”. Maybe he wanted to top and Steve didn’t let him, idk. Anyway, there is no other explanation for them beaming at each other for 20 minutes straight.

Really, the bet should have been about Tony and Steve being unable to go a day without eye-sexing every time one of them starts talking or, idk, moving. But just look at how wide their smiles are all the time - it makes it hard for them to even talk at all. 

But yeah, making bets. There’s actually an amazing fic about that, it’s called Quit While You’re Ahead by  @magicasen​ (ao3 work 3067199), I highly recommend you read it.

And the way they tease each other, oh my gosh. And the mysterious "next *fingers-up-in-a-scissoring-gesture* invention" Tony expects Steve to test drive- 

And both of them running around like two happy puppies when it’s time to set up their camping. 

And yes, Steve knowing Tony all so well and having so much faith in him? I love it. 

Episode 25: Exodus, Episode 26: The Final Showdown

"Sorry to break this romance" (Clint Barton)

These are just worth watching for Tony and Steve holding hands (I stopwatched 6 seconds, and those were only those shown), Steve carrying Tony on his shoulder while holding him under his butt and just Steve's "You're amazing, Tony" and Tony's "No, you are amazing. I am also amazing, but that's because you make me amazing with how amazing you are yourself, Steve." 24/7.

Bonus: Steve carrying Tony around - Season 1 edition (tell me if I missed anything)

#stony #Steve Rogers #tony stark #stevetony #avengers assemble #marvel #superhusbands #ramblings #avengers assemble the stoniest

[op-law]

Charlotte Kato x Reader {I Need You} Ch 2

Kato's Pov

When the young girl didn't reply to my initial attempt to speak to her, I tried again but this time I spoke louder. "Did you hear me (Y/n)? I said your Father's death wasn't your fault" There was something special about this girl and I had felt the need to comfort her but I also didn't appreciate her tears pouring down against my skin. "W-Who said that?" I could hear the fear laced within her voice though in a way it was almost cute. "Down here (Y/n) and please stop crying on me" At first the girl didn't move an inch though she was most likely just scared. "T-The pumpkin?... W-What are you talking about?"

"Yes, the pumpkin, or I believe you know me better as Kato. Please turn me around (Y/n)" I had been stuck in that maze for days now while I tried to gain the attention of anyone that would listen but no one had been able to understand me except (Y/n). "K-Kato? T-That's impossible he's just a-a-a-ahhhhh!" Alright, so I didn't fully think this plan through very much since as soon as (Y/n) seen my face she threw me out of her lap. After I had heard the girl speak so highly of me to her little sister, I would have figured she would have been thrilled to find out my true identity but the reaction she showed me was not the one I expected at all.

"W-What the hell are you!?"

"My name is Charlotte Kato and I'm not sure how I ended up as a pumpkin. Though you're the only person that has been to be able to see my face as well as understand what I'm saying. I need your help (Y/n) maybe if I can get back to Mama then she can do something about this" As I watched her wipe away the last remaining tears, she started to crawl over towards me. "You're really him?... I hate to be the one to tell you this Kato but you're nowhere near Whole Cake Island and this isn't even your world. In this world, you're only a character from an anime so I'm not sure how I would even be able to help you. I'm sorr- Wait just a second did you lick me earlier!?"

"Your hand was covering my mouth (Y/n) though you didn't taste very good" When the girl started to glare at me, I realized that probably wasn't the response she wanted to hear but at least it was the truth. "Come along my little Kato let's get going so we can find out how to break this curse you're under"

~~~~~~~~~~

A Few Hours Later...

(Y/n)'s Pov

"Is something wrong (Y/n)? You look like you're about to cry and I don't like it" As my eyes shifted over to the pumpkin that sat at the end of my bed, I let out a sign before I replied to it. "I don't have a pumpkin to carve for Halloween anymore. My Mom said she wouldn't buy me another one since I already got you"

"Don't you have the Beri to buy your own?" When I shook my head at Kato, I moved to be closer to him though his facial expression didn't show much. "So, my little orange friend have you thought about how we could break this curse of yours? I'm assuming it's a curse unless you have reason to believe it's something else"

"Well, I've read quite of fables over the years, and usually true loves first kiss does the trick to break a curse though I highly doubt you love me so we'll have to cross that idea off of the list. Do you have any ideas (Y/n)?... Why are you blushing?" As I tried to cover my cheeks from the man's view, I sat up on the bed and held my hands to my face. "H-How do you know that I d-don't love you?"

"Hm, I've never met you before (Y/n) though you seem to know a lot about me. You mentioned that I was an anime character in this world can you please explain that a little bit more to me? I don't understand what you meant by it. Also, your sister is rather rude" When I uncovered my cheeks, I briefly looked over at the mirror to double-check that there was no longer bright red though once I confirmed they were back to normal I turned to Kato.

"Well, an anime is like a tv show that we watch for entertainment here. Though I'll admit there's not much information available about you and you're only in a few episodes sadly but I really like you. Hehehe. I guess I have a special place in my heart for the unappreciated characters. Oh, that reminds me I even draw some fan art of you. Would you like to see it? I'm not the best artist in the world but I think it turned out quite good"

"You drew a picture of me? Hmm, I've never had someone freely draw me before. Sure, I'd love to this drawing of yours (Y/n)" As I went to find the drawing in question, I kept looking over at Kato though maybe it was a hopeless thing to actually think a kiss from my lips would break his curse. "Ah, here it is... What do you think Kato?"

"It's rather well done (Y/n) but why are you drawing pictures of me? I'm not the most attractive male in the world and like your sister said I'm just a pumpkin freak. Why would you even draw someone as ugly as me?" What Kato said had really started to pull at my heartstrings since sure he looked different from the others guys but that didn't make him ugly. "I don't care what you look like on the outside Kato. All that matters to me is what's on the inside. You could be the most attractive person on the planet but if your heart is ugly then the rest of you is to"

"Did you want to kiss me and see if anything happens? I mean it's not going to hurt anything to try it" I thought about the man's question for a second though I slowly started to nod my head as I picked him up within my grip. "Y-Yah, we can try it" My face was probably on fire at the moment but all I had to do was press my lips against his and hope for the best. "(Y/n)! Mom wants you to take the trash ou- What in the hell are you doing to that poor pumpkin?"

I really needed to buy a lock for that door since Yuki clearly didn't know how to knock. "I-I'm just thinking about the design I want to crave into it. Why does Mom want me to take the trash out? I did it yesterday so tell her that TJ has to do it" When Yuki replied back to me, I slowly started to groan as my feet moved onto the ground.

"Yeah, TJ left to his friend's house so you need to do it. I'm sorry Sis I would have done it for you but the doctor doesn't want me to put a lot of pressure on my wrist since the break could worsen" When my eyes drifted to the girl's wrist, I reminded myself that she had strained to during her volleyball game last week. "It's fine Yuki. Tell Mom that I'll be down in a minute I just need to finish up something and please for the love of God learn how to knock"

"Hehehe. It's not like your ever doing anything interesting in here (Y/n)... Unless of course, you have some kind of dirty secret you're attempting to hide from me~" Yuki didn't even wait for a response before she ran out of the room. "That girl is rather annoying but she reminds me of my little sister Flampe. Does she like the sight of blood? Flampe can't stand it though that doesn't stop her cruel ways"

"Blood? Yuki gets hurt all the time but I've never seen her uncomfortable with it. Who's Flampe again? There are so many members of your family that I can't remember you all but I do know a few like Katakuri the really tall guy who loves donuts and tea"

"Hm, don't worry about it (Y/n). Now I believe that you were going to kiss me were you not?" I had almost forgotten about that but since Yuki was gone, I could finish what I started though I was getting slightly nervous about kissing the man. "What's going to happen if this works Kato and you turn back into your human form?" Since this wasn't his world, I couldn't exactly just allow him to leave the house since the government would surely want to experiment on him.

"I haven't thought that far ahead but let's just see if this kiss will even work then we can discuss things afterward" That sounded like a good idea so before I could back out from the plan, I pressed my lips against where his carved smile was located. It was the weirdest feeling in the world to kiss a pumpkin though once I had pulled away, I sat him down and waited a few seconds. "I'm sorry Kato it didn't work... Don't go anywhere I'll be right back"

"It's alright (Y/n) if it makes you feel any better your lips are really soft and I liked the kiss"

"T-Thanks K-Kato... When I-I get back we can think about what we can try next" Before the man could say another word, I had already left the room and started to the kitchen where my mother was waiting. "(Y/n) there you are I was beginning to think that you were going to stay locked in your bedroom all day. The garbage is over by the door I just need you to take it to the end of the driveway"

"First of all, my door does not have a lock on it so it's impossible for me to stay locked in there, and second of all, wasn't it garbage day yesterday?" When my mother turned away from the window, I could see she had fresh tears in her eyes. "No matter how old you get (Y/n) you'll always be my baby girl. I know one day soon you're going to leave this house but I'm afraid you won't even say goodbye to me. Please promise me that when that day comes, you'll at least let me see you off"

"What makes you so sure that I'm going to leave this house? I hadn't even decided on the college I want to attend yet and my grades aren't exactly anything special" My Mother only shook her head before she started to walk past me though I did manage to hear her whisper something under her breath. "We don't meet people by accident. They are meant to cross our paths for a reason"

As I thought about what my Mother could have meant I made my way over to the front door before I grabbed the trash bags and headed outside. Thankfully there were only two bags but they weighed quite a bit. "What the hell could she have thrown away? Garbage day was yesterday so there shouldn't be this much trash... Oh, it's the big garbage pickup week isn't it?" As I continued on down the driveway, I finally made it to the end though based on the dark clouds that were approaching from the east I knew it was going to rain soon.

"I should hurry back to the house before the rain starts... though then again it wouldn't be so bad if I did stay out here for a while. Hm, I wonder if Kato would like to join me?" Since we lived in the middle of nowhere, we had this long dirt driveway but I liked the fact that we didn't have any neighbors for miles. "I'll go see if my Pumpkin King wants to play outside with me~ Hehehe"

~~~~~~~~~~

End Chapter 2

[eat0crow]

Marigolds

Summary:

Marigolds-the flower of the dead. They are used to guide spirits visiting the land of the living.

Marinette is used to weird, she's no stranger to spirits. Even so, she never imagined she would meet her soulmate like this

Chapter 1

“Wow, didn’t think magic girls were actually a thing. Good to know.” Is the first thing Marinette hears after she drops her transformation.

Which makes no sense because Marinette is completely, one hundred and ten percent sure that Tikki was the only living thing in this room with her. She’s careful to check than double-check. The tape she had left along the window had still been intact when she entered it. The powder she dusted her hatch with hadn’t been disturbed.

The only thing out of place is the chill in the air, it’s bone-deep like something leaching the life out of the room. A cold current that makes something in Marinette’s brain tingle. Chat would call it fur rubbed wrong, it’s the closest Marinette can come to describing the sensation.

No one should be in the room with her.

Her identity must be maintained at all costs, she takes precautions to ensure it. None of them have been bypassed.

“Got to say I dig the suit,” the voice says completely indifferent to how she’s tensed. Marinette can’t place it. “It’s a little gaudy sure, but hey we can’t all be the Dark Knight. I get the appeal even, flashy, attention-grabbing, it’s a nice stick.”

Marinette can’t breathe, she’s not sure what exactly to do. The voice is coming from behind her. It was relaxed, casual if a bit hollow, like this was the sort of thing that happened every day.

“Maybe not the safest option. You're like a freaking stop sign. How does that work, like sure the Robin costume is a bold as hell traffic light but that’s the point, you know? Draw away the gunfire so the big bad Bat can swoop in a knock them all on their asses.”

Marinette narrows her eyes. Because while knowledge of the Justice League is expected to some extent. Their world-renowned, it would be hard not to have heard of them with all the earth ending disasters they’ve put a stop to, the lack of knowledge is surprising. Everyone in Paris knows who Ladybug is.

The fact that he doesn’t seem to, it sets off a red flag in Marinette’s mind. One that makes her fingers twitch with nervous energy even though her muscles are locked in place. Frozen over by manic fear.

“It’s funny, you’re acting almost as if you can hear me. I’m not complaining, talking to myself gets boring fast, trust me on that one. Bats isn’t anywhere close to great company.”

Marinette turns. Reclined back on her chaise is a boy. He’s tall, taller than Adrien, probably taller than Luka even, with windswept black hair that falls into his eyes. Eyes that are so blue they’re the first thing she really notices about him. They glow iridescent, demanding attention and focus and….

The next thing she notices just as he opens his mouth again is the blood.

“Wait,” He says slowly, his words tentative. “You can see me, it’s not just the isolation talking here. You can see me.”

The blood dripping down from his matted hair onto the bruises that line his cheeks.

“Am I not supposed to?” Marinette asks, her voice shaky.

The blood bubbling out from fresh burns.

“No,” his voice is just as uncertain. “You really shouldn’t.”

She thinks her reaction is more than justified. Even if her screaming makes the boy pop out of existence and sends her parents racing up the stairs.

.

Her parents leave her after a few minutes. Buying her excuses of spider, spider I saw the biggest spider under my desk. It had so many legs! without much fuss.

Tikki comes out of her hiding place shortly after they disappear down the stairs. There’s a look in her eyes, one that Marinette’s seen maybe a handful of times in the two years she’s held her Miraculous.

It’s a look that comes with answers. Answers that scare Marinette far more than the questions ever did. The first time Tikki’s eyes glinted like this Marinette transformed for the first time. The last time, Marinette met the guardian and begun training to take his place.

This is the look Tikki gives her when she’s about to be trusted with a secret that changes everything.

She hates this look.

Marinette's still standing in the middle of her room staring vacantly at her chaise. “Tikki who was that.”

“That’s not what you should be asking Marinette,” Tikki says looking at Marinette with a keen eye.

Often enough Tikki will watch Marinette like she’s waiting for something. What that something is, Marinette doubts she truly will ever know, that she’ll even want to know. Maybe it’s due to the magic that binds Tikki to the role of guide, which forces her to needle Marinette into asking the right questions in order to get her half-answers.

Tikki is a god. No matter how kind she is, no matter how much she cares for Marinette, her games are not optional.

Marinette will never be able to refuse Tikki, not after having spent years as her patron.

“I saw him,” Marinette chokes out, “I saw him Tikki.”

“That’s good Marinette, I saw him too.”

“Have you seen him before?”

“No.” Tikki pauses, brushing the hair out of Marinette’s face. “I’ve seen others, yes. But not him.”

“Others, who else-”

Tikki cuts her off with a little tut. “Marinette, you’re still focusing on the wrong question.”

Genies were most likely based on the Kwami. They’re all a fickle bunch, hiding behind double meanings and exact wording. It’s hard to figure out just what question Tikki wants her to ask the right question, the exact right question. She can’t tell her the who the why would be pointless to ask about. Marinette knows Tikki will only answer with something having to do with fate. So what's left is…

She breaks her staring contest with the chaise, turning to meet Tikki’s eyes. “What was he.”

“You’re still not quite there. You, humans, are always a lot of whats depending on the when. I could say child or man or soulmate or-”

This time Marinette is the one to cut Tikki off. “He can’t be my soulmate. You said Ladybugs and Black Cats are always connected.”

“And you are. A lot of Ladybugs find their soulmates outside of their Black Cats. There’s a lot of different ways to be connected Marinette, most people have more than one thread attached to their soul, my bugs especially so. Not all threads are soulmates.”

“What does that make Chat Noir than?” Marinette asks.

“Nothing besides what he is now, soulmates aren’t the end all be all, you know. They’re not the soul the completes you, they’re just the soul that fits best around you. They’re a possibility, your hearts still your own.”

“So even though he’s my soulmate…” Marinette trails off.

“Not is, was,” Tikki says, her voice sad. “That’s the when.”

“Was.” She can feel her throat closing up around her words. “What is he now.”

Even as she asks it, Marinette knows the answer. It’s in the corner of her mind, right along the edge snuggled tightly against secrets like Chat Noir’s identity and the real reason Master Fu has lived nearly two hundred years.

She doesn’t want to put a name to the feeling the boy had stirred in her. She doesn’t want to put a name to what the boy is. She doesn’t want to acknowledge the end of a possibility that never truly started to begin with.

Names have power, it’s why their titles are so important. Once she says it. Once the word claws past the dark barbed parts of her mind and out her mouth there will be no going back.

Tikki has never been afraid to do what Marinette can’t, she’s a spirit after all. Humanity is something she observes and doesn’t understand.

“He is a ghost silly,” Tikki says.

It’s an end, one marked before anything had ever had the chance to begin. It shouldn’t hurt but all the same, Marinette feels a part of her heartache. The part of her that's still so heartbreakingly young wants to cry over how unfair this all this.

The part of her that’s grown up much to fast, faster than anyone should have to, stops her from mourning. Life is not fair, the Kwami have no interest in silly things like that. Fair is a concept that Tikki won’t get.

Fair is something that no one gets.

Marinette doesn’t get any sleep that night either.

Notes:

I really wanted to play with the prompt "when they die your soulmate comes to haunt you" . It had so much potential so while my insides said 15k one-shot my heart said nope we're gonna milk it. I needed to get some multi-chapter practice in any way.

Also because Jason is currently 21 in the canon universe I will say this takes place when he dies, which is 15 according to his death certificate. Marinette is also 15, she's had her Miraculous for 2 years now after receiving it at 13. I feel no guilt in destroying the show's timeline to suit my needs, not when the episodes don't care about continuity.

#maribat #crossover #crow writes #Jason Todd/Marinette Dupain-Cheng #dcu #jason todd #ml #miraculous ladybug #marinette dupain cheng

[thtdamfangirl4]

Saying Goodbye to The Good Place

Tonight I watched one of my favorite shows in history end. I watched it live with freaking commercials and I tuned out the rest of the world. And I cried my eyes out so many times. And I don’t know how well I can explain that, or how exactly to put into words what this show has meant to me, but I’m going to cry.

I started watching this show when season 2 came on Netflix. I had heard good things about it online and a friend or two had watched it, so I decided to give it a try. (I had watched the first, like, 2 episodes months before but hadn’t kept going or given it a real chance.) I found myself completely hooked. I watched the first season in two days and had finished everything the show had to offer by the end of the week, diving into tumblr accounts, twitter threads, the cast’s social media pages. None of that is uncommon for me when I first become obsessed with a show.

But The Good Place was uncommon. It was unlike anything I’d ever seen, and remains so to this day. It had fabulous humor in many facets, from Jason’s lovable idiocy to Chidi’s relatable indecision to Eleanor’s perfectly captured selfishness to Tahani’s name-dropping to Janet’s cacti to Michael’s comments about humans and the dynamics between them all and so much more. And the show, the writers, balanced all of that with so much heart. With Eleanor’s drive to be better. With Chidi’s ever-present willingness to help. With Jason’s unexpected and loving wise advice. With Tahani’s desire to be loved. With Michael’s growing understanding of humans and our lives. With Janet’s evolution and coming to understand what it means to feel and to love. And it was absolutely beautiful to watch these characters go through whatever they might go through in a given episode. I would watch this balance of perfectly imperfect in any situation you put on my screen.

But the writers and creators put them in a situation I’d never imagined would be on TV: discovering morality and spirituality in the afterlife. These characters navigated dilemmas we all face in our everyday lives. They made jokes and went through ridiculous scenarios and reboots and they messed up and tried time and time again, and through it all, we the viewers were learning. To be good. To be better. Maybe not necessarily by copying these characters, and certainly not their lives on earth, but by inspiring us to think about these questions and the implications of our lives. This show was a lovely escape from reality for 22 minutes until the picture faded and I found myself contemplating the things Chidi’s ethics class had tackled that week, or thinking about my own actions, what my version of the good place would be. All in all, this show made me think about the kind of person I want to be. And it actually made me a better person.

I think a lot about the little speeches made on this show, which have been anything but little to me. (Don’t get me started on Chidi’s wave speech I’ll be crying about it every day forever.) And I find myself thinking about what Michael says to Bad Janet almost every day. That what matters is that we try to be a little better today than we were yesterday. That that’s where hope for humanity lies. And that thought, that simple thought which should not boggle the mind of any decent human being, is groundbreaking. Because these simple and profound truths about the universe and humanity were nestled in every single episode of the good place, right there between jokes about Jason’s dance crew and Janet’s void. And they found their way into our lives, and I know that even just watching this show once a week was one of the things that made me a better person that day. Which is why I’m so grateful to this show.

Eleanor taught me that it’s okay to make mistakes. That being a little trashy is always fun as long as you have a good heart. And she and Chidi taught me that love is out there. That soulmates are something you make, not something you find, and that even if you can’t understand why at first, people who love you are going to come into your life and the real ones won’t disappear. She taught me that the walls have to come down someday, and that when they do, the view is so much better. Most importantly, she taught me that nothing is ever set in stone. That people can change and get better and learn to love and care and be loved and cared for.

Chidi taught me that the little things can’t hold me back. I felt seen by his (albeit, exaggerated) indecision and anxiety. But he grew throughout this show and through his journey, I learned to move aside the little struggles to make room for the big joys. I learned that helping someone is always worth my time, because even if I never see them again, or I never get thanked, I’m putting a little more good into the world. And he would always do that. He taught me that it’s okay to come into your own and stand up for yourself and what you believe in. He and Eleanor taught me that there’s always someone out there who has your back, and that love means putting someone else first. I especially saw that in the finale.

Tahani taught me that it’s okay to know who I am. That confidence is something each person deserves to feel. She taught me that there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be loved, as long as you remind yourself that it doesn’t determine your worth. She taught me that mistakes are a tool for learning, but they can’t be used if we pretend we didn’t make them. She taught me that it’s okay to be a little frivolous when frivolity brings you joy. She taught me that spite can be a great motivator, but the results are much more fruitful and enjoyable when you do things for other people.

Jason taught me that I don’t have to have all the answers. That there’s more to life than numbers and books and school and all the things that give a college student looking at the future anxiety. He taught me that it’s love that matters, and doing the things that bring you joy. He taught me that people are not always what they appear to be at first glance, and that everyone has something worthwhile to say. He taught me that words don’t have to be fancy or eloquent to be poignant and meaningful. He taught me that embracing who you are and what/who you love is what makes a person happy.

Janet taught me that knowledge isn’t everything. She reinforced the idea that emotions are not inferior or contrary to facts and knowledge, but rather something even deeper and more meaningful than trivia or information that could come from google. She taught me that life is a complicated mess full of millions of questions, and there are some that cannot be answered. She taught me that you love who you love, even if it’s unexpected, and there is zero shame in that. And she taught me that one of the noblest pursuits in the world is that of making people happy, especially the people you love.

Michael taught me that humans are complex, and sometimes they kind of suck, but they are still worth loving. He proved that people are not all good or all bad. He taught me that what matters is trying to be good and kind and honest and loving. He taught me not to give up on what I know is right. He taught me that it’s okay to change your mind when you learn new things, and that it’s more than okay to decide to do what’s right at any stage in the game. He taught me that people are worth believing in. He taught me that being wrong can be one of the most rewarding things in the world. And he taught me that the human life we have is a gift.

Together, these characters taught me that we are all capable of changing and improving. They taught me that it’s okay to be who you are, even if a lot of things change. You can still be loved for all of your little quirks and flaws and habits. You are worthy of being loved even if you aren’t the best version of you yet. And they taught me that we can all get there eventually. More than anything, they taught me that the love we have for each other, the bonds we build with the people in our lives, the friends, the family, the significant others, everyone, is what makes us human and what makes us whole. It drives us to be better and to make others happy. It supports us and holds us as we grow together.

So I just want to say thank you. To Michael Shur for creating this show and its characters. To the writers for making me fall in love with these people and stories. To Kristen Bell and Ted Danson and William Jackson Harper and Jameela Jamil and Manny Jacinto and D’Arcy Carden for bringing these characters to life and making them into people that I will never be able to let go of. To anyone involved with this beautiful show that I have enjoyed through the very end. Thank you for giving me a reason to laugh, cry, contemplate, and feel content with a show that was groundbreaking and stunning and hilarious and heartwarming with thousands of good moments and a perfect ending. These characters will always be a part of my heart, and I will always try to be a little better tomorrow than I was today because of them. Thank you, and goodbye to new episodes. I have a feeling I’ll be watching all the ones which are now old time and time again.

#the good place #tgp #eleanor shellstrop #chidi anagonye #michael #tahani al jamil #jason mendoza #janet #kristen bell #ted danson #william jackson harper #jameela jamil #manny jacinto #d'arcy carden #michael shur #goodbye good place

[swishandthenflick]

I was tagged by @teabooksandsweets ♥ Thank you so much lovely!! Hope you are healthy and well!!!

Pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions. Tag 10 (or however many) people.

This is Us

Doctor Who

Agatha Christie’s Poirot

Scrubs

The Middle

Who is your favourite character in 2?

Okay this is hard because this show has a huge cast. Obviously I love the doctor. Which doctor though? My favourite doctors are 10 and 12 for different reasons. 10 was my first doctor so he will always have a special place in my heart. My dad watched this show while David Tennant played the doctor and he was the one that introduced me to this series. The 12th doctor was familiar and at the same time different. His personality was not very likeable but I really loved the fact that he wanted to be a good man and seemed to care less than all the others doctors combined but in reality 12th was the one that cared the most!!

Who is your least favourite character in 1?

I suppose that in the beginning I did not like Kevin so much or Miguel but they grew on me. I do not have any character that I dislike right now. I think that all the characters have their faults but in the end they try to be the best versions of themselves. They never give up no matter the hardships they have faced and they fill me with positivity.

What is your favourite episode of 4?

The first and last episode are so great and the last one gives me all the feels. I also love the episode “ My fallen Idol”, so real and so emotional and of course every episode that  Brendan Fraser has been in!                                        (looking at you @ciceros-ghost :)))

What is your favourite season of 5?

I really like the 1st 6th and last season of the show. But the whole show is great!!!

Who is your favourite couple in 3?

This series does not have many couples if you ignore all the cupid matches that Poirot makes. He is great at creating couples. My favourite I guess is Captain Hastings and  Dulcie Duveen his wife another match made by Poirot. 

Who is your favourite couple in 2?

I have to pick Rory and Amy. They have such a wonderful relationship. At first glance they do not look like a good couple but after a couple of minutes they are the real deal. Rory was pretty amazing from the beginning and Amy grew so much through the course of their relationship. They went through many things but always chose one another in the end. If I have to pick a brotp though definitely Donna and Ten!!!

What is your favourite episode of 1?

The first episode that started it all and made me fall in love with the show, also  “ Super Bowl Sunday” ( I cried so much though but it was an amazing episode) “The Cabin” also a big cry and “After the Fire” since I love what ifs and Jack is my favourite character!!! And now I realise that I picked the episodes that made me cry the hardest!!

What is your favourite episode of 5?

Every episode that is Sue centred since she is a sunshine and literally the nicest and most positive person ever. Special kudos to the final and “The Graduate” episodes!!!

What is your favourite season of 2?

It’s so hard to choose a season if I have to pick though I would say the 4th because of Donna and all the seasons Jenna Coleman has played (I love her acting!!)

How long have you watched 1?  

Only for a couple of months I actually binge-watched it during the quarantine but it became a quick favourite!!!

How did you become interested in 3?

Again my father was the reason behind it. “Murder on the Orient Express” was given with a newspaper and my father gave it to me saying maybe you will like this book. Then all hell broke loose. I started reading the books and then searched for any movie adaptations. This is how I ended up discovering David Suchet’s amazing Poirot!!

Who is your favourite actor in 4?

John C. McGinley and Neil Flynn were the best for me. They are great actors and they played their roles extremely well!!

Which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5?

This is so hard don’t let me choose. I love all of them for different reasons!! 

Which show have you seen more episodes of, 1 or 3?

I have seen all the episodes of 1 and 3( The easiest answer I gave). They are both so good that you cannot stop until you finish all the episodes.

If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be?

I guess one of the anonymous doctors in the back. The drama is good but we are here to become doctors after all.

Would a crossover between 3 and 4 work?

Omg I don’t think that this would be possible. They are set at different times but I guess that if we had a modern Poirot and he went for a check up and a murder was commited. After all anything can happen inside J.D’s head.

Pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple?

I can’t imagine the couples any different than they are now. I think that all the couples have found their perfect match!!

Overall, which show has the better storyline, 3 or 5?

3 and five are so different. I love both storylines for different reasons!!

Which has better theme music, 2 or 4?

Definitely 2. It has such a great music theme.  Scrubs does not have a lot of music with the exception of the great musical episode. I really love the beginning theme in both but Doctor Who definitely wins this round!!

Tagging : @anelementofsurprise @absolute-twaddle @bibpevensie@ciara-jane @ciceros-ghost @doctor-punkenstein @maraschino-merry @jameskirk-spaceidiot @serenastella @poirott and everyone else that wants to do this

#personal #tag games

[miguel-manbemel]

Aspects & Fanfics Ep. 35: The Vacation Part 2: I Don’t Wanna Stop Loving You

Here comes the next part in the story I started in the previous episode. Before starting, I want to remind that the Remus that appears in this fic is an alternate version of the original. I know the original Remus is a lot crazier than how I’m depicting him here, but then again, his introduction here was completely different and he has a backstory that canon Remus does not, hence the differences. It’s just another take on him, which is the whole purpose of making an AU in the first place after all. I’m leaving you with the story, then, and hope you enjoy. Until next time.

SYNOPSIS: After the terrible misunderstanding at the beach, Remus has locked himself in his room and doesn’t want to see anyone. Janus and the others desperately try to get to him, to gain his forgiveness, and also fearing for him and his mental health.

WARNINGS: Angst, in the whole sense of the word. Some slight innuendo on behalf of Remus. Romantic dukeceit.

EPISODE INDEX

[the off-voice narration is mixed with flashback images from the previous episode]

ROMAN-NARRATOR: We all decided to take a week of vacation in the Royal Castle of Sandersia. The idea was to be all together in wholesome fun, so that Remus and Roland got relaxed and managed to befriend each other. I didn’t expect how bad this would turn out to be. We were at the beach, when suddenly…

[flashback scene]

IRA: What is going on here? [yelling, calling the others] Guys! Guys, Roland and Remus are missing! Guys!

[the others hear them and start looking in all directions, trying to find them. Roman swims next to the beach]

ROMAN: I hope nothing happened to them.

[suddenly, Remus rises up from under the water]

IRA: Look, there is Remus, he was diving into the sea. But where is Roland!?

[Remus swims calmly without any concern at all]

IRA: Why is Remus so calm!? Did he have anything to do with this? This is suspicious as heck!

ROMAN: Remus! Remus, come here at once!

NARRATOR-ROMAN: We all accused Remus of doing something horrible to Roland. It wouldn’t help that Roland appeared floating on the sea. I was so horrified I couldn’t help it. The words just came out of my lips.

ROMAN: [also horrified] Remus, what have you done?

REMUS: [in despair] I did nothing! I swear! You have to believe me!

[Roman swims to the place Ian pointed at, until he reaches Roland. He’s unconscious, floating on the water]

ROMAN: [horrified] Oh, my goodness gracious, Roland! No!

[when he touches Roland, he flinches and opens his eyes]

ROLAND: [scared] What!? What’s going on!?

[Roland sinks into the water, getting out as quickly as he can, then looks at Roman and takes some ear plugs out of his ears]

ROMAN: Roland, you’re alive! Thank goodness, you scared the sh** [bleep] out of me!

ROLAND: I’m… sorry, Roman, I was floating on the water, with my ear plugs so that water didn’t enter my ears. I guess I got so relaxed that I fell asleep for a moment. I’m sorry I scared you.

ROMAN: Then that means… [looking at Remus, who watches the scene from afar] Oh, Remus!

[Roman returns as fast as he can to where Remus and the others are. Roland follows him from behind]

ROMAN: Remus, I’m so sorry!

REMUS: [serious face] How could you honestly believe I could do that to you, even for a second?

IRA: Well, it wouldn’t have been, like, the first time you had tried to do that…

REMUS: [yelling in a sudden outburst of wrath] I’m talking to my brother, not to you! I don’t give a f… [bleep] sh… [bleep] about what you think about me, you fake doodle! But I do care about Roman’s opinion and…

[tears burst out of his eyes. Remus turns around, then gets out of the water and approaches the deck chairs, not facing the others, who follow him a few steps behind]

ROMAN: I have no excuse. I can only tell you that I’m sorry and that I should have trusted you from the start.

REMUS: Yes, you should have. But you didn’t. And it seems no matter what I do to be better, you’ll never fully trust me, right?

NARRATOR-ROMAN: Remus had all the right to be upset. It was our fault. He dressed up and decided to return to the castle all alone, but before he left…

[Remus walks two steps, then, with a broken voice, he looks at Janus, with his eyes wet and red, and speaks]

REMUS: What hurts me the most is that… even you, Janus, had doubts about me… Even you, my love, thought me capable of…

[before Janus can answer, Remus starts running towards the castle. They can’t see his face, but they all notice clearly that he’s crying]

NARRATOR-ROMAN: Then Janus decided to go after him. If there’s anyone that can make him speak, that’s Janus. I hope he succeeds…

[intro sequence]

[Janus is knocking at the door of his room]

JANUS: Remus! Unlock the door right now! We need to talk!

REMUS: [voice from inside] I said, leave me alone! I don’t want to talk right now with anyone!

JANUS: Not even me? I’m your boyfriend, I need you to talk to me!

REMUS: Right, a fine boyfriend you are, not trusting me in something as bad as this! Don’t make me laugh!

JANUS: That’s not fair! I was the first to claim your innocence, even before Roland appeared! Does that not count?

REMUS: You had to use your sixth sense to figure that out, and until you did that, you were just like the others! You also thought me capable of doing that!

JANUS: I did not! I love you!

REMUS: You’re lying. And even if you aren’t, no matter how many fairy tales Roman has told you, love isn’t magical and it can’t fix everything, certainly not this! Now, again, leave me alone!

JANUS: Well, this is my bedroom too! Where do you want me to sleep, in the hallway?

REMUS: You’ll come up with something! This castle is full of rooms, I’m sure you’ll find somewhere else to spend the night. Now, go away!

JANUS: [sighs with a sad face] As you wish. Good night, my love.

[Remus doesn’t answer. The others arrive at that moment]

ROMAN: Any luck, Janus?

JANUS: No, I’m afraid not. He’s locked me out and doesn’t want to open the door.

ROLAND: That’s odd, these doors didn’t have a lock, to begin with.

ROMAN: Well, Remus can mold Sandersian reality at his will as much as I can. He probably created the lock himself to keep us out.

ROLAND: I see… Couldn’t you just… remove the lock, then, Roman, so that we could open the door?

JANUS: I don’t know if that’s a good idea. Forcing him to see us right now, when he’s so upset, could be counterproductive. It will be best if we leave him alone for the night. Maybe tomorrow, when we all calm down, we will see things clearer. But I’m gonna need somewhere else to sleep, guys.

IRA: Don’t worry about that. I have an extra bed in my room that I can get ready in a minute. You can sleep there tonight if you want.

JANUS: Thank you, Ira. Always on the rescue as usual.

IRA: Of course. That’s what friends are for, buddy.

ROMAN: If tomorrow everything stays the same, Virgil and I can sleep in the Royal Suite and you can sleep in our room. That way you’ll be closer to him, even if with a wall between you.

JANUS: Thanks, Roman.

ROMAN: Well, I don’t think we’re gonna gain anything by staying here staring at the door. The sun is setting. Let’s go have some dinner, then call it a day. Maybe, with some sleep, our minds well be clearer, even Remus’.

[They all go to the dining room. Meanwhile, in the bedroom, Remus is lying on the bed, with his face on the pillow, which is soaking wet in his tears and stained with his makeup. The pillow drowns his otherwise loud whining sounds as he grabs the sheets with both hands in despair, almost tearing them off. Times goes by and it’s night. The corridor outside the bedroom is quiet, until Thomas and the Sides approach their doors to go to bed, saying goodnight to each other. A few seconds later, when all the doors are closed, Janus approaches Remus’ door with a plate of food, and knocks the door softly]

JANUS: Remus, it’s me. You don’t have to open the door if you don’t want to. I’m here to bring you some dinner. You haven’t eaten anything in hours, and if I know you, and by now I know you well, in your state you probably haven’t summoned anything to eat. Please, have some dinner, at least do that for me. [Remus doesn’t answer. Janus sighs with a sad expression] I expected this. I don’t know if you’re asleep or if you just don’t want to talk to me, but I’m leaving the plate at the door. If you’re awake, please, take it and eat it when I’m gone. Don’t see me again if you don’t want to, but I beg you, don’t harm yourself, either physically by starvation, or mentally by gloating in your own misfortune caused by our mistake, it would kill me. I love you. I’m completely honest when I’m saying that I love you, and that I’m sorry I failed you today. Good night, my love.

[Janus leaves the plate on the floor in front of the door, then, he touches the door with a face of longing and leaves the hallway. After a couple of minutes, the door opens, and Remus grabs the plate, then looks at the empty hallway with a sad face. His cheeks are completely covered in dry blue stains of crying his makeup away, and his mustache is tilted and half-off]

REMUS: I love you too, Janus. Sleep well, my love.

[Remus closes the door behind him. The night goes by and morning comes. As usual, when Thomas wakes up, all the other Sides wake up too. Remus, in his room, wakes up and looks at the empty spot at the bed where Janus would have laid. He sighs, then gets up. He didn’t even take his green suit off and slept the whole night wearing it, so it’s completely disheveled and wrinkled, with the green sash half-untied. He looks at the mirror and sighs]

REMUS: [ironic] Ready for the Met Gala, am I not? It’s ironic that, when I’m feeling most serious, my appearance is the most disgusting, and when I’m more in the mood of disgusting someone, my appearance becomes so regal… Well, we’ll have to fix that, Remus, don’t we?

[Remus snaps a finger, and his face and outfit look neat and clean again. He sighs again]

REMUS: Okay, Remus… the show must go on. I won’t give anyone the excuse that this all failed because I didn’t try hard enough. [forcing himself to smile madly] Time to shine again!

[someone knocks at the door. Remus points at the door and the lock disappears]

REMUS: [singsong voice] It’s o-o-open!

[Janus comes in]

JANUS: Good morning, Remus. How… how are you today?

REMUS: [with a mischievous smile and his usual tone of voice] Oh, a good night of sleep can do wonders on someone’s mood! I’m better than ever. Don’t you see me? I’m brighter than a star and ready to wreak havoc again!

[Janus approaches Remus. While doing so, he notices the plate he left last night, empty on a table. Then he looks at the bed and notices the stains of makeup and tears on the pillow. On the verge of crying, he looks at Remus, then hugs him by surprise]

JANUS: I’m really sorry, Remus. I’m sorry I failed you.

REMUS: [hugging Janus back, tapping gently his back with his usual mischievous talk] Okay, okay… easy, my sweet anaconda, don’t strangle me with your embrace just yet. It’s too early in the morning for that and I just got dressed…

[Janus looks at Remus]

JANUS: I know you’re pretending, Remus. I only hope I can amend all the pain I am causing you.

[a rictus of pain appears on Remus’ face and his masquerade falls apart]

REMUS: You are the only one I can’t fool with my acting. Yes, it still hurts, but it will stop, eventually. I know that your love for me is real, and I’m gonna fight for it, even against myself if I have to. Because the alternative… would be even worse, because… I don’t wanna stop loving you. [with a dramatic glance at Janus, breathing heavily] For f… [bleep] ‘s sake, I won’t stop loving you!

[Remus gives Janus a long kiss, then he hugs him, grabbing him as if he was afraid Janus would disappear if he let him off]

JANUS: I only hope I can make myself worthy of your love for me.

REMUS: [looking at Janus in the eye] Don’t say that. You are already worthy of it. Don’t base your own value just on how much love or hate you receive from others, not even me. It’s not a good path to walk by. Believe me, I’ve walked it myself and it’s not healthy, cause the first who has to value you is yourself. I could only start healing my soul when I understood that. You made a mistake. A terrible mistake, indeed, but a mistake nonetheless. And we all make mistakes, me more than anyone else. I have no right to demand you to be perfect when I myself am far from it. I forgive you and I hope you forgive me for kicking you out of our room last night. [hugging him again] How I’ve missed you, even in my sleep.

JANUS: That’s already forgotten, Remus. And I missed you too.

[Roman approaches the open door]

ROMAN: Good morning, guys. I’m glad to see that you… fixed things up. Sorry to interrupt you.

REMUS: Good morning, Roman.

ROMAN: Remus… I don’t know how to say I’m sorry. I accused you of a horrible thing without any proof and I shouldn’t have done that. I… I’ll understand if you want to leave right now and go back to your room in the Mind Palace. I won’t complain.

REMUS: What are you talking about, Roman? We still have six days left of vacation and I’m not giving them up! Besides, Thomas counts on us. Remember that quarantine was making him crazy and he needs these days of relax in the Mind Palace as much as we do. So I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying here and hope that you all stay here too as we planned.

ROMAN: Then, that means… that you don’t hate me? You’re not mad at me?

REMUS: Not so fast. I never hated you, Roman, but I’m still mad at you. You’re right, what you did was horrible, and it hurt me real bad… [noticing the stained pillow, he makes a subtle gesture with his finger to clean it magically before Roman notices it as he enters the room] … you’ll never know how much. But… You are my brother. You are literally the only true family of blood I have. I can’t hate you. Besides, it took me literally 20 years to gain your love and acceptance, and you’re gonna need much more than what you did yesterday to make me want to throw them away. I’ll let it all slide if you just…

ROMAN: What?

REMUS: Promise me that next time, if something like this happens again, you won’t jump to conclusions before listening to me and allowing me the chance to defend myself. It’s something that anyone would ask for, not just me. I know I’m a madman with a stick of deodorant and a mace…

JANUS: Not accurate at all.

REMUS: …but I would never ever do anything that would cause you true despair. I know you love your brother Roland. I even know you love him more than me.

ROMAN: Remus, that’s not…

REMUS: Yes, it is, and it’s only natural, you’ve lived with him all the years that you wouldn’t let me, so it’s natural that you love him more, and I’m not blaming you. The point is that I know that losing your brother would destroy you, and I would never do that to you. There was a time when my old bitter self would have done it, but you know very well I’m no longer that Remus. I don’t care what Ira, or the others, or even Thomas thinks about me. But I love you, Roman, I was part of you, literally. That’s why it hurt me so much that you could think I could do that to you.

ROMAN: I love you too, Remus. Much more than what you think. And of course I promise. So, could you please… give me a hug?

REMUS: [sighs] I really should just crush your skull with my mace, but a hug will work too. Come here, brother, but don’t get too effusive, we don’t want to fuse in front of Janus, do we?

[Roman and Remus throw their arms around each other and squeeze each other tightly while Janus watches the scene with a proud smile]

ROMAN: I was so worried about you, Remus. Last night, I thought I was going to lose you.

REMUS: Don’t worry about that. Bickering and fighting to death from time to time is what brothers do, isn’t it? They always survive their battles, and they don’t love each other any less because of that.

ROMAN: Yeah, you’re right. And now… let’s go have some breakfast. And then, the day is yours, Remus. You decide what we do and where. I’m dedicating my day to you and only to you. It’s the least I can do to compensate you for what’s happened.

REMUS: I’ll think about it while we have breakfast… Roland can come with us too if you want to. After all, the point is that we get to know each other, isn’t it?

ROMAN: It is, Remus, thank you.

REMUS: You come too, Janus. If these two insane guys try something against me, I want to have someone to defend me.

JANUS: [chortles] You dork… As if you weren’t the insanest guy in this whole principality.

REMUS: Touche.

[Roman, Remus and Janus get out of the bedroom, heading to the dining room to have breakfast. Later in the day, Roman, Remus, Janus and Roland get out of the castle riding horses. Janus, really scared as it is the first time he’s ever ridden a horse. The others are more experimented, so they ride more naturally. After they’ve only ridden a couple of miles away from the castle, Janus’ mare stops]

JANUS: [grabbing to the mare with the same panicked face a cat would sport if he was clinging to something to avoid touching water]I’m totally not scared at all, what are you talking about? Seeing a snake on a horse or mare is not the most ridiculous scene anyone could ever see, at all.

REMUS: Relax, Janus, it’s easier than you think. Just hold the bridle and try to communicate with your mount. Make her see where you want to go, be one with her, and it will all be fine.

JANUS: It’s easier said than done, Remus. All of you have had years of practice in horse riding. I’m a mess of a jockey!

REMUS: We’re still on time to turn back. Do you want to sit behind me on my horse?

JANUS: That’s the most ridiculous idea you’ve ever had, Remus… [begging] Please?

REMUS: Okay, calm down, Bowler Handsome, I’m coming to the rescue.

ROLAND: You could have said that you had never ridden a horse in the first place, Janus. We could have done anything else so as not leaving anyone behind.

[while moving to Remus’ horse, sitting behind him]

JANUS: I though it would be easier to ride a horse. I was wrong, and it was Remus’ idea, I didn’t wanna spoil it.

REMUS: It’s okay, now. [Remus creates a horseman riding Janus’ previous horse] Take the horse back to the castle.

[the horseman nods and rides the horse away]

ROLAND: [freaking out] He… appeared out of nowhere… Is that how you create people here in Sandersia, so easily? Was it that easy for me to appear, Roman? Just snapping your fingers and I was there? It makes me feel so tiny…

ROMAN: You aren’t tiny, Roland. You are my brother.

ROLAND: Only because you imagined me so, Roman. But if I appeared as easily as that horseman… what could have stopped you from imagining me completely different? Like a servant in the palace, or a farmer or a peasant anywhere else… This reminds me that I’m at your mercy all the time and that my life isn’t mine at all, if I ever had a real life at all. I call myself a prince, but I’m… so worthless…

ROMAN: Calm down, Roland. Your life is very real, and it is yours and no one else’s. I only imagined you the way you were at your beginning, but it was you who shaped your own life with your life choices, and nobody else will ever be like you because of that. Only you can be Prince Roland of Sandersia, no one else can be. That makes you unique, and valuable, not only for me but for anyone else who gets to know you, because there will never be two like you. That’s one of the many reasons why I and so many others love you, Roland. Don’t doubt it.

ROLAND: [sighs] Thank you, Roman… I’m sorry, everyone, it’s just that I freaked out a little bit when you did that, Remus.

REMUS: I’m sorry, I didn’t realize…

ROLAND: It’s okay. Let’s just go about our day, okay? Will you two be comfy in a single horse?

REMUS: Hold on to me, Janus. [wiggling his eyebrows with a mischievous smirk] You know I always love when you hug me like that from behind…

JANUS: [blushing] Remus! Shut up and don’t let me fall!

REMUS: Never… to both things.

[Janus sighs and holds tightly to Remus while he smirks. Then they all go on riding their horses. After some time riding through the forest, they find a huge waterfall. They all get down of their horses and sit on a nearby rock]

JANUS: This place is not beautiful at all…

ROMAN: I know, right? Roland and I used to come here to play when we were younger. Remember, Roland?

ROLAND: How could I forget? It was our secret place, where we always went when we wanted to run away from our responsibilities and have some time for ourselves. I can’t even count how many times we splashed water from the waterfall on each other. Then father always went furious when he saw us returning all wet. Remember, Roman?

ROMAN: [sighs] Seems like only yesterday.

REMUS: [also sighs, but with a sad face instead] It sounds so fun… At least, vanishing me far away allowed you to have such a wonderful life… A life I will never know…

ROMAN: Sorry, Remus, we didn’t mean to bring back ghosts from your past.

REMUS: Nah, it’s okay. I was just thinking out loud… as usual in me. Didn’t mean to break your nostalgic mood.

ROLAND: How… how was your life in that island… if I may ask?

ROMAN: I don’t think it’s a good idea that we make him remem…

REMUS: It’s fine, Roman, I don’t mind answering to that. After all, it is my life. It’s not like avoiding talking about it is gonna change the past. The first years… were tough. With the jewel that Roman gave me, I could make myself a little home. You took care to leave on the jewel just enough of your power to summon that and not a boat so that I could try and follow you. Then, I just learned to survive by myself. The island had resources enough so that I wouldn’t starve. It had trees with fruits and a little well with an endless supply of fresh water.

ROMAN: I left those there before I brought you. I couldn’t leave you to die of thirst or starvation, could I?

REMUS: We’re Sides of Thomas, Roman. That couldn’t kill us. But certainly, without those things, my life would have been miserable, as the feelings of extreme hunger and thirst would have been very real, and not pleasant at all, not even for me. So, I thank you for that.

ROMAN: You’re welcome. I wish everything had been different back then.

REMUS: But I meant that it was tough because… I still couldn’t understand. Everything I felt for you was love, an unconditional brotherly love. I revered you like only a brother can revere another brother. I was too young to understand what I could have done that could have upset you so bad that you would have wanted to get rid of me like that, and I tortured myself, day and night, trying to understand why. Now I do understand, but if only you had taken the time to teach me. If only you had had patience with me when I was so… destructive… everything could have been so much different. I eventually stopped making questions and just settled down with the fact that that was my life now, and I couldn’t escape it for the time being. A year or so after I was left in the island, I felt my summoning powers increasing. I started being able to summon bigger things. First, I turned my house into a manor, then into the castle you now know. I could also summon a boat, finally, but I had no way to know where to go in the sea to find you, so, it meant nothing for me.

[Roman, Roland and Janus listen to Remus, not saying a word, with emotional faces]

REMUS: You already know about when I started turning into a Dark Side due to Roman’s constant repression of me, and what I did with the infamous black cauldron that almost killed Thomas, so I won’t say it again. The point is that, when I finally turned into a Dark Side, that was a point of no return for me. It was one thing that you had left me in the island, but putting that curse into me – because I knew from the start that was your doing, Roman, even if you did it unconsciously – I thought it was an uncalled act of gloat on your behalf and… I guess that’s when my mind definitely clicked out in the wrong way. It was then when I started hoarding anger, and hatred, and thirst of revenge towards you, feelings that only grew stronger as years went by. And when, a few months ago, I suddenly felt the beacon sign that allowed me to know where exactly you were on the other side of the sea… Well, you both know the rest, right?

ROLAND: And that’s when it all happened… When you almost deleted me from existence, just as easily as you created that horseman…

REMUS: Again, Roland, I’m sorry. I won’t say that it wasn’t me who did that, because I would be lying and Janus would call me out immediately, but I changed and I’m very sorry for everything I did when I was in that insanely bitter state of mind.

ROLAND: For many months afterwards, I was afraid of your mere mention, as if you literally were the boogeyman for me. It scared me that you would want to come back and finish what you started. I never mentioned this before, not even to Ira, but I’ve spent whole nights without sleep, too many. I was afraid that, if I dropped my guard and fell asleep, you’d enter through the window and… I’d never sleep again.

[Remus sighs with a face of huge regret]

REMUS: You were right, Roman…

ROMAN: On what?

REMUS: My actions had consequences and I can’t move on from them until I face these consequences. And boy, how I am facing them right now. I never cared to be the bad guy… but now that I see how much of a bad guy I’ve been… I don’t like it. I’m so sorry, Roland. I really am.

ROLAND: Well, I guess that’s just how the story went. We can’t turn its pages backwards, I guess. I just hope that, by understanding each other better, we both can start moving on and driving our own demons away.

REMUS: Even if I am your demon?

ROLAND: For the conversations we’ve been having lately, I’m beginning to understand that you are not my demon anymore. My demon is the old version of you which I hope never comes back. If what you said about no longer being that Remus is true, I have no problem in considering you a friend, just like the other Sides.

REMUS: [heartwarming emotional smile] Thank you. It really means the world to me.

ROMAN: [also emotional] This is all I wanted to gain from this experience, and my wish is coming true. Thank you, to both of you.

REMUS: Happy to oblige, brother.

ROLAND: Me too, brother.

[both Remus and Roland hug Roman]

JANUS: Well, guys. I think it’s time to come back. I’m in the mood for having lunch with the others.

REMUS: You’re right. I’m hungry too.

[they all ride their horses again and go back to the castle. At the door, they find Thomas]

ROMAN: Hi, Thomas, what’s up?

THOMAS: Thank goodness you’re okay!

ROMAN: Wait, what? What’s wrong, Thomas?

THOMAS: I can’t find any of the Sides or Ira anywhere.

ROMAN: What? How is that so?

THOMAS: I don’t know, I stayed in my room for a few minutes, with my laptop, proofreading one of my new scripts…

ROMAN: Thomas, I told you we’re on vacation! You promised you wouldn’t work on anything during this break. You shouldn’t even have brought your laptop in the first place!

THOMAS: It was just proofreading, in a way it’s a form of entertainment too… Wait, the point is that when I came out of my room, I couldn’t find anyone. They were all gone.

ROLAND: Maybe they’ve gone out for a walk all together. It is a fine day, after all…

THOMAS: If they had done something like that, I think they would have asked me to join them, don’t you think? They wouldn’t have left me all alone in my room without at least warning me they were leaving. Besides, I asked some servants in the castle, and no one has seen them leaving the castle at all.

ROMAN: That’s odd…

JANUS: It’s true that this look suspicious. Where could they be? Roman, you said you could locate anyone on Sandersia. Can’t you check where they are now?

ROMAN: I can locate any character in Sandersia and bring them to my presence… but they’re Sides, I cannot sense their presence like that.

ROLAND: Well, if Ira is with them, maybe you can locate him? Inside Sandersia, he’s a character, or so you said.

ROMAN: Yes, you’re right, maybe I could try to locate Ira. Let me see… [Roman closes his eyes and concentrates. After a few seconds, he opens his eyes again] This is weird, I can’t locate Ira. And you are right, Roland, I should be able to locate him, or at least his Sandersian body around his real Sprite form. Maybe he left Sandersia and is somewhere in the Mind Palace as a Sprite?

REMUS: Roman, let me try too. I am also Creativity. My range of detection is not as great as yours, but here in the continent I can detect all Sandersians nearby. If Ira is in the continent, maybe I can find him.

ROMAN: Okay, Remus. Maybe you’ll be luckier than me.

[Remus closes his eyes and concentrates. After a couple of seconds he opens his eyes]

REMUS: I found Ira! He’s 20 miles northeast from here.

ROMAN: That’s weird! Why didn’t I sense him?

REMUS: There’s something else, Roman. I detected a strange aura around him… a dark aura.

JANUS: A… dark aura? What do you mean a dark aura?

REMUS: I don’t know, that’s what I sensed… [suddenly in pain] Aw! My head!

ROMAN: [scared] Remus, are you okay?

REMUS: It’s… like if… Ira was taking control of me… from a distance… I…

[suddenly, Remus grins evilly]

ROMAN: Remus?

“REMUS”: [with a totally different voice] So… you’ve found me? I don’t care, it’s too late already.

JANUS: You’re not Remus! Who are you!?

“REMUS”: Why, I’m Ira, of course. I thought you would have figured it out!

JANUS: Ira? Did you fly all the way here to bite Remus or something? What are you doing?

IRA: I don’t need to bite him anymore to take a toll on him. And don’t worry, I don’t need your crazy boyfriend other than for leaving you a message. Do not try to stop me. If you do, your friends will pay the consequences, starting with your dear Ian.

JANUS: I… you can’t be Ira, there’s something in you that tells me you’re not. If you try to do something to my brother, or to our friends, I…

IRA: You have been warned. It’s been quite difficult to fulfill this part of my plan, and you won’t spoil it. The Dark Master will return, and there’s nothing you can do about it! Mark my words!

[suddenly Remus loses consciousness. Janus grabs him before he falls to the ground]

JANUS: Remus! Remus, are you okay?

[Remus opens his eyes]

REMUS: I… I think so… Aw, my head… it still hurts…

THOMAS: [angry and concerned] Not again… Not him again! I thought we got rid of him, but he always returns and returns and returns!

ROMAN: Well, the original Light Master already warned us that there are still fragments of the Dark Master all over the Mind Palace, trying to set him free. Maybe one of those fragments took control of Ira, and it’s using him as a pawn for some plan.

ROLAND: What are we going to do, Roman?

ROMAN: You are doing nothing. This is too dangerous for you, Roland. It’s a mission for the Sanders Sides.

ROLAND: I’m not gonna stay behind when they’ve got Ira! He’s always been there to protect and assist me in everything I needed! I’m not gonna leave him when he needs me! And also, I’m the regent governor of this principality! It is my duty to protect it from its enemies too! And there’s also the fact that currently there are only three Sides available plus Thomas. You’re gonna need reinforcements. So don’t try to stop me, brother, because this is a battle that I’m gonna fight alongside you!

ROMAN: But…

ROLAND: Don’t waste any more time trying to convince me, Roman, because you can’t. I’ve said that I’m going with you, and I’m going with you!

ROMAN: [sighs] Okay… I cannot stop you if you’re so determined. But you better be careful, okay?

ROLAND: I promise, Roman. Now, let’s go rescue our friends!

[to be continued, guys, gals and non binary pals]

[ending card]

[a few minutes later, the gang has been prepping and is ready to go after Ira]

THOMAS: Okay, how are we going to do this?

ROMAN: Well, we’ll just follow the signal Remus received. We’ll make a plan when we get there.

REMUS: They’re far away, though. Maybe when we get there, they’ll be gone. And I don’t know if it’s safe to try and locate them again after what he did to me. Of course, I don’t care about the danger, but I don’t want to ruin the mission, or, even worse, do something bad to you if he takes control of me again.

ROMAN: If only the carriages worked as they’re supposed to. Yet it is only safe to go that fast through the royal roads around Sandersia, where only royal carriages are allowed to transit. We wouldn’t want to run over some unaware Sandersian or crash on any unexpected building, do we?

JANUS: Well, for sure the slowest medium of transportation is the one we’re using right now, standing still until it gets dark. Let’s get moving already.

ROLAND: You’re right, let’s go. But we will make a detour and make a couple of visits around town.

ROMAN: Around town? Do you think it is wise to do that right now?

ROLAND: I do, Roman, because we’re gonna need reinforcements. And I’ve got a tactical idea.

THOMAS: What do you mean?

ROLAND: Well, right now most of the Sides are missing. I think we’re gonna need help from some Sandersians that would very well fit in in this mission.

THOMAS: I’m not following you.

ROLAND: If Patton is missing, we’ll recruit the Dad Guy. If Logan is missing, we’ll recruit the Teacher Guy. And if that isn’t enough, we’ll get Brain, Sleep Guy, Printer, and any other character you can think about, Thomas. We may not be Sides, and we may not be as strong as you are individually, but we are proud Sandersians, and we’ll defend our homeland from any intruders that threaten its existence. We can make one heck of an army if we set our minds upon it, and not even a figment of the Dark Master will defeat us if we get together into serious business.

ROMAN: I’m so proud of you, Roland. You make a heck of a leader.

ROLAND: [putting his hand on Roman’s shoulder] I learned from the best. Now, let’s go. We’ve got a lot of people to call.

[the gang then starts walking, heading to town]

#thomas sanders #sanders sides #remus sanders #janus sanders #roman sanders #sanders sides fic #sanders sides fanfic #sanders sides fanfiction #dukeceit #romantic dukeceit #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #angst #aspects and fanfics

[ae0nx]

FRUITS BASKET ‘19 EPISODE 24 VS FRUITS BASKET ‘01 24-26 (PART 2)

Link to Part 1 here

So just to start it off again... I just wanna reiterate...

When I think of the True Form Arc, I think three simple points are vital to be shown:

Kyo’s true form is to be revealed to the audience and to Tohru

Kyo’s past with Kazuma and his mother/(partly)father

Tohru still accepting Kyo and declaring her love need for them to be together and share each other’s pain and joy

Also, if you’re more invested in my review of the 2019 version, scroll further down as most of this is gonna be the 2001 rewritten bits recap. Sorry?

-------------------------------

- Again, I really appreciate that the 2001 version left us with that pre-transformation cliffhanger. It’s a really great separation and keeps us on the edge of our seats. Plus, gives the horror and effects of Kyo’s transformation much needed time. I love the 2019 version too but it could’ve been excellent with a WHOLE episode dedicated to Kyo’s true form transformation rather than just half of one... Plus, aren’t these events are supposed to take course during an entire night leading into morning? 

I can’t decide which iteration of the Kyo transformation I like the most. I just know that the manga version doesn’t live up to the animated versions...

They’re both pretty horrifying and scary and look incredibly painful. I’d probably give it to ‘19 cos Kyo had tears in his eyes as he was transforming which hurt my heart and also just cos you know it’s in high def andddd the transformation isn’t a cloud, it’s fire embers. This is great gore-y content and I’m a little desensitised cos I had to watch/read this scene three times in one sitting so... 

I loveeee Tohru’s resilience. Kazuma’s here saying soliloquies and philosophical questions and Tohru just takes off after Kyo! And the manga and ‘19 version definitely wanted to highlight this message to the upmost: Tohru’s love is so STRONG. And BADASS. But, a part of me also loves the time ‘01!Tohru takes to evaluate the situation cos in all fairness... it is a very shocking reveal (if Tohru wasn’t already shocked enough from them turning into animals)

I like how in ‘01 anime we don’t get the inner monologue of Tohru evaluating what she saw. It leaves the whole notion of Tohru chasing after Kyo a little more mysterious as to whether she will or not. And the silence says it all anyway. Only the sound of the falling rain... I like it better. I tend to lean towards scenes with more action and less dialogue as someone who apparently learns better through visuals rather than dialogue. 

Akito appearing like a fuckin ghoul out of nowhere is still ridiculous haha but I have to give kudos to the ‘01 English VA Chad Cline. He definitely elevates the scene when he says this one sentence:

- I also like that this event (and also Akito) feeds into Tohru’s insecurity of not truly being a part of specifically Kyo and Yuki’s world. Not truly understanding them. She’s been living with them for almost a year by now(?) and I’m sure she felt because she knew the worst secret of them already there couldn’t have been anything even worse. And in a way, she feels cheated? ALSO KYO JUST TURNED INTO A FREAKIN ALIEN CAT MONSTER. I know Tohru’s very much aware that she still has much to learn about them but she couldn’t have predicted this. And it kinda puts her on the level of being an outsider once again. I like that it concentrates on Tohru’s own feelings towards her place rather than just her feelings towards Kyo. 

...I’m gonna get into some heavy 2001!Shigure defending, so I’m sorry if you don’t favour this iteration - stick with me for a sec lol

I’m ignoring all the ‘it’s not accurate, it’s not real’ chants in my head because... LOOK HOW DEJECTED HE LOOKS.

...

2001 gave me everything I wanted from Shigure as a character. Yes, he’s very interesting and conniving and fun as he was originally depicted. But... this Shigure has emotions and is fully showing them! That’s all I FUCKIN WANT. I just want him to show that even though he’s making these dangerous moves and manipulating people for his own benefit, that he has a conscious that is eating away at him and eventually will break. It may be too early in the story for an event like this to take place but I do appreciate that it’s shown. I get very frustrated with the fact that Shigure stays somewhat the same throughout the course of the manga but I guess the only person who does stay the same in the story is the narrator...

- I don’t know if the director of the 2001 version knew that they only had one season to translate Fruits Basket somewhere in the making of these three episodes, or even before. But, it definitely shows with the choices they make with the inclusion of Shigure, Uo, Hana, Kagura and Yuki in the search for Kyo. It’s almost as if they read future arcs and felt to just mash an iteration (or bastardisation) of it to try and conclude the whole story... which was quite a desperate move.

I also like the way this scene closes.

👌🏾

I actually really like this moment from Kagura! She’s actually being mature! And rational... and sort of letting go of Kyo at the same time. I do think if Fruits Basket ‘01 was given another season, it would’ve been fleshed out (obviously) but it’s such a great moment. Again, these are all signs that the end was nigh and they felt they had to tie up all the character arcs that were involved very quickly and I don’t necessarily blame them for trying. It just made them look a bit silly when looking from a 2019 view.

- But yeah, Yuki being involved is a no-no. He felt the most out of place when it comes to ‘characters that should’ve not been involved’. He makes a point when he finds Kyo about how they should both stop running away but it’s not fully fleshed out enough before this event for me or anyone else to care about. It’s kind of unfortunate cos I quite like the concept of Yuki being there especially tying in to how Yuki comes to a realisation of himself and Tohru’s relationship. 

- Also, are Yuki and Kagura tight like that? Lol for him to go rushing after Kyo basically cos she asked? mmmm.... 😓

This is actually my favourite moment from the 2001 version of the True Form Arc! It’s visually stunning and haunting and just... interesting. I like that they included the cats. Cats that would normally gravitate to Kyo but are now taking the voices of haunted figures of his past. Whether it’s in his head or not. 

In general, I felt Kyo’s mental anguish in the ‘01 version was a lot more artistically styled and creative. Very creepy and even more sad.

I do like that Tohru went to her mother’s grave for comfort/guidance before finding Kyo. I probably would’ve included a scene like that myself in the 2019 version as it adds a preliminary to Tohru’s future conflict between her love for her mother and her love for Kyo. AND it also adds time between the night Kyo transforms and the eventual sunrise when she finds Kyo. How far is Kyoko’s grave from the Sohma house? Lol

But yep, Uo and Hana being there was irrelevant but it’s pretty funny that Hana’s waves were used as a last minute explanation as to why they felt they had to attend Kyoko’s grave. But, I guesss the writers wanted to use this as a moment of Uo and Hana letting go of their ‘daughter’ to let her become a woman (reminds me of Yuki’s comment of how he saw Tohru as a woman when she ran after Kyo) and go after her man. It’s a conclusion... but it’s meshed with so many other themes and conclusions that it ALL DOESN’T MATTER. Plus, I don’t really like this as a thing; Uo and Hana will always be Tohru’s surrogate parents. ALWAYS.

Anyway, look at this beautifully depressing visual that ‘01 gave us for THREE EPISODES *sips wine*:

But seriously, while the visuals are so drastically dark compared to rest of the ‘01 season and are dragged out for sooooo longg, it is a very beautifully, depressing design. I love the way that all background music is edited out. Everyone is crying. Everyone is confused. The sound of rain is a constant throughout it. Honestly? It almost broke me cos the heaviness of it is exhausting, haha. And I have to commend it on pure shock value cos ‘01 Fruits Basket was barely dark until this arc. I think that’s what essentially made me adore it when I first discovered the ‘01 anime. I hadn’t read the manga so I didn’t know any better, but the darkness and pain in this arc is so beautifully shown and I feel like people forget that when critiquing the ‘01 version.

They jam packed a whole lot of character arcs in here when really the story should be focused on Kyo and Tohru’s reaction to Kyo. And I honestly, don’t blame them. It’s just too much at once that you don’t get to appreciate any arc at all because it’s not pushed to it’s full potential. It’s mostly just a feeling of sadness... that you later equate into genius...  because it’s sad? Which, I guess, could be seen as manipulatively clever? But now that we have the 2019 version, I think people will be more likely to decipher the bad from the good. Like, I have :)

- BACK TO 2019 VERSION: Wow, Kyo, really took out a whole cliff, huh?

I honestly got impression from the manga that Kyo did push and injure Tohru enough for her to get a huge amount away from him but not so far that she fuckin DIVES INTO A LAKE. My God, this was a bit dramatic lol

Ouch... that wound looks worse in the anime than the manga...

QUEEN TOHRU. I love everything about this.

You guys know I LOVE a good parallel and look at this couple meeting each other’s needs and taking their first steps. I can’t. I’m going to be crying into my wine soon. Nothing needs to be said about this scene, except excellence in ALL AREAS.

🎵TEARS STREAM.

 🎵DOWN YOUUURRR FAAACEEEE

🎵AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII....

I can’t get over Kyo’s face in this moment. I just- MY HEARRRTTTT. GOD TAKE ME. PLEASE. Couples that cry together, stay together. Omggg.

Even if we can’t agree on much when it comes to 2001 vs 2019, we can both agree that Tohru stays being an ethereal goddess. OUTFIT APPRECIATION. LIFE APPRECIATION. I’m so tired. haha.

So in conclusion, I think 2001 succeeded at showing all the three main points of the True Form Arc. I just think it got the message of this being a Kyo/Tohru centric tail a bit misconstrued because they wanted to make this a general zodiac tale of them finding freedom and release through Tohru. And it definitely takes away from the Kyoru centric storyline that runs through the True Form Arc. And while I think the True Form Arc could’ve used another episode in the 2019 version, it’s quite clear that 2019 wins this battle in all areas of it being a more whole and complete yet emotional and stunning version of the True Form Arc.

I would go into what happens at the end of episode 26 in the ‘01 version but it honestly kinda angers and frustrates me? And I’m mentally exhausted soooo, I might go into it some time next week before the next 2019 episode drop. Also, I’ll tie up some thoughts of the ‘01 version of Kyo and Kagura’s date. This was fun! Only took half a day to organise my thoughts, ahaaaa.

#fruits basket #furuba #fruits basket 2019 #fruits basket 2001

[almondbiscotti]

Stuff I’ve Watched this CB

Sorry, really got a lot. I’ve ranked them from most recommended to least recommended. And separated movies from series. And have included some shows I’m planning to watch! 

Series

Kim’s Convenience S4 I LOVE APPA. Was a bit appalled I didn’t know S4 was out on Netflix because it’s one of my favourite shows on Netflix. It’s REALLY GOOD. So many laugh out loud moments, the characters are WONDERFULLY fleshed out and the chemistry between the actors is through the roof. Story telling is also amazeballs. 10/10 would recommend.

Dirty Money S1&2  10/10 would recommend! I really liked Dirty Money because I learned so so so so much from the show! I do think the producers had no intention of being unbiased and presenting a neutral stance on the “villains” because I wanted to punch every single “villain” every damn episode. If you’re looking for objectivity and “both sides of the story”, I don’t think this show is for you. But that said, everything presented is factual so I did learn a lot. Supplemented with additional reading post show, I felt like a whole new world was opened to me. :) 

Kingdom S1&2  JUST WATCH THIS. IT’S SO DAMN GOOD. 

Only issue I had was how damn ridiculous it was that whenever a horde of zombies were running towards our protagonists, they’d just stand there and do their typical Korean AISSSSSHEEEEBYEFUCK stance for like a full 17342154 minutes while the music and tension builds and the zombie horde comes closer and closer and closer and THEN they finally decide to run. Eh friend, what siah. Also, I concluded from watching Kingdom that if there ever was a Zombie apocalypse, I’m completely and utterly FUCKED. But I live in ridiculously hot Singapore surrounded by water... so I guess I’ll be alright? 9.5/10 

Derry Girls S1-2 Irish Catholic School Girls, I’M SOLD. I mean, come on. How can I not LOVE this show? It’s HILARIOUS. And having spent 10 years in an all girl catholic school, Derry Girls really really resonated with me. The characters are laugh out loud hilarious, and all really likeable! The only issue I had with it is that the characters don’t really grow very much over the course of 2 seasons. So season 1 first episode vs season 2 final episode, it won’t matter even if you watched it backwards.

Because the seasons are very short, only 6 episodes per season and there are only 2 seasons so far, it doesn’t matter very much. For now. But I reckon if they had like 7 seasons, it’s going to get VERY repetitive. But at the moment, ISSA GREAT! 9/10

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency S1 8 Episodes of ABSOLUTE CRACK. It’s based off something Douglas Adams wrote so I wouldn’t expect anything less. Acting isn’t great but the storytelling is riveting. If you enjoy Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (the book), it’s very likely you’d enjoy this. It can get quite frustrating sometimes though because it’s so ridiculous so if you’re looking for a detective series based on solid logic, look somewhere else. But if you just want some fun and silliness mixed with some smart, this is wonderful. 8/10 

Never Have I Ever S1 I had a lot of trouble liking the main character but on retrospect, it might be because the character doesn’t even like herself that much to begin with. Had quite a few laugh out loud moments and the Asian family moments were very relatable.  THE MOTHER. THE MOTHER IS EVERYTHING. She’s my favourite, I would watch an entire series with just her. The main problem with Never Have I Ever (in my opinion) is that it tried to do a lot of things to prove the same point. So it does get a bit frustrating after a while. By the 3rd episode, I’m just like GET ON WITH IT I GET IT. I GET THAT FAMILY IS MOST IMPORTANT, I GET THAT SHE’S NOT GRIEVING HER FATHER. So... it can get a little cliche and repetitive. To me la. But still funny, still good. :)  8/10 

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt S1-4 The opening track really really grows on you. UNBREAKABLE! They’re alive, damn it! IT’S A MIRACLE! Created by Tina Fey, this show is silly and full of fun.

I really liked S1-3. It’s a very light-hearted show that makes you feel really good watching it because it’s just so positive and optimistic. S4 got a bit too ridiculous for me and the characters started doing some really weird shit that is a bit too incredulous (it was never a logical show based too much on reality to begin with but S4 was really a bit much). But if you like shows like The Good Place, I reckon you’d like Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. 8/10

The Circle USA Can’t remember why Housemate and I started on this but it was actually not bad! I think it’s because the OG characters were really likeable! JOEY! JOEY IS A PRECIOUS PUPPY THAT NEEDS TO BE PROTECTED AT ALL COSTS. It’s not very intellectual and I was never too invested in any of the characters or relationships. BUT! great if you don’t want to think too much and just watch some mindless TV that isn’t absolute trash. (TOO HOT TO HANDLE I’M LOOKING AT YOU.)  7/10 

Tiger King S1 SIEOW ONE THIS SHOW. It’s an absolute MINDFUCK. I started with many questions, I finished with A BILLION more. I don’t even know how to describe or explain this show. IT’S MADNESS. There are big cats, gay husbands who turn out not to be gay, tiger queen who allegedly killed her husband and fed him to her tigers, crazy dude who tried to pay some other dude 5k (i think? or 3k? seriously it’s crazy) to kill tiger queen, big guns and expired meat and pizzas?!?!! Yah, Mindfuck. CRAZY/10

Cable Girls S1-4  Season 1 and 2 were BEAUTIFUL. The characters have so much depth, the acting is impeccable, the costumes are AMAZING, the cinematography is inspiring, the story telling was riveting. Then season 3 and season 4 happened and... I will pretend the show ended in S2. -_- Character development took a major hit from season 3 onwards. But I would still recommend Cable Girls because the acting, the acting is AMAZING. 10/10 for s1&2. 5/10 for 3&4.

Money Heist S4 Was quite hyped for this and was really quite let down. The beauty of Money Heist has always been structure in chaos, elegance in the mess. S4 was very frustrating because it didn’t have that. I felt like they were trying very hard to make you think the heist team was going to fail and started to fill in weird impossible things to ensure the plot was still able to proceed. Did not enjoy S4 as much as I thought I would. :(  But if you have invested in the previous seasons, you know you’re gonna watch it even if it’s absolute crap anyway. 6/10

The Letter For The King S1 Ep 1&2 Premise was quite interesting, trailer was interesting enough. But DEAR GOD WAS IT SLOW. And also, literally ALL the characters were unlikeable! I don’t understand why anyone would make a show with entirely unlikeable characters. I couldn’t get past the 2nd episode but I went ahead to read a few reviews and recaps. Yeah, was a good idea to stop at episode 2. Would not recommend. 2/10

Movies

Game Night  Rachel McAdams is QUEEN. A really loltastic film. Is a really good post dinner wind down to end the day film. And particularly because I can relate to how competitive our main couple was. :) Some parts don’t add up and there are a few times I think the story becomes a bit too much for itself, trying to layer upon layer of twists, but still a good fun movie! :) 7.5/10 

The Half of It Heartwarming. :) Enjoyed it because i think the main protagonist is very likeable. And she’s so... plain and relatable. I hate to say this though but... I found the whole movie quite forgettable. Like, it didn’t feel very deep to me though it did touch on quite a few intense and deep topics of first love, family, self acceptance etc. But it’s just doesn’t reverberate through every cell of my being. The whole movie is just so gentle and because it is so mild, it becomes forgettable. Acting is good, character development is okay I guess. But generally... just mediocre to me. But not bad. I just wished it wasn’t so... light and airy. I wish it made me cry. 7/10

Cabin in the Woods Housemate wanted to watch it because it’s horror-esque. I was okay with it cos it’s horror comedy. And also Chris Hemsworth. :D Was quite loltastic. Though SPOILER ALERT Chris Hemsworth’s character dies a bit too early for my liking. I really liked the over the top inclusion of various different monsters near the end. Was fun trying to identify them. Fun movie! Not very scary but quite a bit of gore that’s peppered with lots of humour to make it okay. 7/10

Extraction LOTS OF CHRIS HEMSWORTH. But plot wise... hmm... Housemate enjoyed it because he said the fight scenes and the things our extractor does are very real and is what a trained professional would do in the high pressure situations he finds himself in. They probably had a great consultant to keep things realistic.  I didn’t enjoy it as much because I felt that our hero was... too powerful and the bad guy was too bad. Almost caricature-ish. Difficult to have character development like that. But hey, I didn’t watch it for depth, I watched it for Chris Hemsworth’s face so... very much satisfied. :) 7/10 

Other Stuff I’m Planning to Watch 

After Life S2 I liked S1 so... just a continuation I guess. Typical English humour. Also, I watched S1 dealing with a death of a friend so the show does have some sentimental meaning for me.

Hollywood S1 New show seems promising! There are blacks, gays, sex, extortion, glitzy costumes, glamour and really blonde blondes. Also the guy who plays Sheldon Cooper in BBT. High hopes, I have high hopes! 

The Victims’ Game DETECTIVE SHOW SOLVING CRIMES. I’M SOLD. 

Whoa fuck, I really watch a lot of Netflix. 

#netflix #NessaBingeLogs

[ramblian]

Jericho Thoughts

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhh

okay so. i’m rewatching jericho. i first watched it sometime around 8th-9th grade, I think maybe somewhere in the first half of 2014. I basically remembered this: the main character was the black sheep of the family, he came back to town, and atomic bombs destroyed most of the US, and the show was about the town dealing with the aftermath. the guy from continuum and one ep of flashpoint played a character i liked named dale (eric knudsen) who liked a popular girl who ended up befriending him, and the asking-for-flowers flashpoint ep guy was the responsible brother. Someone used to be a teacher. The main character looked like Skeet Ulrich, but i didn’t know who that was, just the name.

turns out the main character WAS Skeet Ulrich, and 2 characters (heather and emily) used to be teachers, and i apparently forgot almost all of the major characters. I’ve been rewatching it with the knowledge of which characters die, so that’s good. the show is really good, and it’s really intense. I’m almost done, and it’s tough to keep watching both because it’s so intense and because i know a character i like is about to die tragically. 

watching this show makes me so TENSE. i think it really got bad when goetz showed up and i knew bonnie’s death was coming up. i’ve been watching the same episode for like an hour and i started 6 minutes in from another viewing. i don’t know why i’m so stressed. well actually i do it’s because things in this show are AWFUL but i know that no one dies after bonnie.

i also really like that the plot is very much what drives the show. romantic relationships somewhat matter (eric/april/mary, dale/skylar, and stanley/mimi in particular get screentime, while jake’s relationships with emily and heather are there and meaningful but not something that drives the story or gets a lot of attention. dale and eric’s relationships have also been less important in season 2) but they are regularly sidelined while the character deal with the latest crisis. characters have backstories that aren’t always super expanded on, like johnston’s chaotic neutral dad or stanley and bonnie’s parents, because they don’t have a meaningful impact on the plot- how mimi grew up isn’t going to change how the Greens deal with food shortages. 

also, i love that it’s a post-apocalyptic show where there’s a lot of fighting and lawlessness and not once have they used rape as a plot device. the closest it ever came to being mentioned was when maggie, a survivor pretending to be military to get towns’ supplies, said that ‘out there, men only want women for one thing’ and that’s IT. i respect that so much. way too many shows and books and movies are like ‘things are bad... and we can only express that through rape’ but this show never does

also the grey morality is very well done in season 1 (the bad guys are clearer in season 2). characters fight and do shitty things because everyone is just trying to survive. Constantino was wrong to start a war with Jericho, but i also understand where he was coming from. Ravenwood ransacked New Bern and left them with almost nothing, and Jericho never bothered to warn them. There were some people considering not honoring the deal to repay the windmills in food. New Bern was on the brink of destruction and Constantino tried to get the resources for survival where he could, by force. The thing with the refugees too. There isn’t really enough food for everyone, and it’s true that Jericho’s been getting a lot of refugees when it’s barely managing to sustain its own population. Some of the refugees have been stealing from them, and sometimes you have to make tricky decisions to survive. But the refugees are also probably going to die if they get sent away, and understandably they cannot accept that. they’ve been stealing food to prepare for this possibility, and they are willing to be violent to secure their place because jericho is much better off than just about anywhere else and they don’t want to die. Roger gets in a fight with Gray and accidentally shoots him, but then actively chooses to hold him at gunpoint and refuse him medical help unless he guarantees the safety of the other refugees. That’s obviously awful- but he’s also trying to protect the lives of the 50 innocent people he brought here. In the end, the refugees get to stay because some Jericho residents volunteer to share their rations, but Roger does not because he obviously committed a terrible crime. He’s not a bad person, but of course he can’t just be forgiven and integrated back into Jericho like nothing happened, and he accepts that and leaves with only a gun from Jake to protect himself because at least the others and emily will be safe. 

also that emily and roger’s relationship wasn’t made meaningless in order to further her relationship with jake even despite their history as high school sweethearts.

oh god i just watched the scene where stanley’s talking to bonnie in the morgue and it’s so well done and i’m just in bed crying- not sobbing or anything, but plenty of tears. i don’t know what the last show to make me cry like this was; i’ve been watching so much youtube that i haven’t been watching a lot of hard hitting shows lately i guess. Barry was extremely Fucked Up, that might have made me cry, but it might not have- it had me fucked up for weeks, but i don’t know if i cried.

anyway the scene with stanley and bonnie in the morgue is so good. Stanley talking to her like she’s still alive the way they always did for their parents, and talking to her sign language bc that’s her language. Telling her to say hi to their parents. Letting her know that mimi is still alive, that she succeeded in protecting her, and thanking her for it. Still joking around a little even though he’s obviously heartbroken and just being so genuine with her. Neither of them deserved this. 

wow can’t believe heather is a fuckin bootlicker, knowing that the government is extremely corrupt and that she and beck are destroying new bern and choosing to continue to work for that government.

oh beck just has to be some sort of a stupid son of a bitch. absolute goddamn buffoon. siding with the govt, arresting jake in the shadiest way possible in the middle of a crowd, choosing to torture jake (which if he knew a goddamn thing like hawkins did he would know was ineffective), and then thinking that after everything this town and those rangers have done to protect themselves and their loved ones that it was just going to work out for him like the others aren’t going to come for jake immediately and efficiently. i liked beck well enough before but any fondness or respect for him is fucking absolutely gone.

at least eric is really getting to show off his leadership skills now. johnston’s dead, jake’s been arrested/kidnapped, hawkins is busy with other shit. eric’s always one of the second-in-commands but this is one of the few times he’s just plain in command.

“your friends have escalated this to a level i will not tolerate” right but you dragging jake to a fuckin blacksite to torture him was fine???? YOU ESCALATED THIS YOU DUMB STUPID SON OF A BITCH. you have really been given so many chances this season to not serve an evil government and try to protect these people and you’ve failed almost every time, huh? he’d also have to be some sort of an idiot to think that a clearly faked note with jake’s signature saying ‘this bad’ would stop anyone. god i haven’t escalated to hating someone this much so quickly in a long fuckin time.

love how beck is leveraging the entire town of jericho and choosing to oppress them in order to get the rangers to turn themselves in <3 i love punishing innocent people to use them against others just like goetz did last episode <3 what a good guy

i dont know why there are so many beck fics on ao3 because this man fucking sucks. like, can you imagine refusing a whole town food, power, and lights as a bargaining chip, blaming someone else (”don’t forget, you caused this”) and then still thinking you have the moral high ground? incredible mental gymnastics when will beck be in the olympics

heather: your actions are so blatantly terrible that i am just now beginning to consider not defending you to everyone. take responsibility for what you do

beck: hmm. no. my choices are jake’s fault

i know beck is probably going to ‘redeem’ himself by the end of the episode but i don’t fuckin care. too late for him now he can’t just say ‘oops’ and pretend he hasn’t done all of this shit. wild how his actions are now literally being compared to those of nazis during wwii and people still like this guy.

hey do you think beck is an idiot asshole or just pretending to be one for fun

commanding officer: go ahead and destroy everything in the area

beck:  🤔 is killing all those people wrong?

oof rip eric sure is rough when you have to ally with the guy who tortured you and killed your dad to protect ur city but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. also where the hell has dale been? i’ll let it go bc the show isn’t consistent on when he shows up and is a major part of town but in universe it sure is fuckin weird, and you know beck would have dragged him in for questioning too

oh wow beck finally decided to actually try thinking critically and addressing the obvious evidence about cheyenne’s corruption. that makes up for everything and i can stan now /s

‘i’m no longer taking orders from the cheyenne government. i believe it’s corrupt at its core. its actions are criminal’ oh so like everyone’s been telling you this whole time? the actions like the ones you’ve taken, not even at anyone’s command? idiot.

lmao i’m not as opposed to constantino’s methods as the show thinks i’m supposed to be. a revolution against a corrupt, oppressive government is not peaceful. it cannot be. the only good fascist is a dead one.

#jericho #jericho spoilers #in case this shows up in the tags and someone sees it or smthn