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moonpedri · 1 year

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does he know.

summary: you love gavi and you're happy in your relationship with him. but for some reason you're the moth and pedri, his best friend, is the flame that pulls you in.

pairing: pedri x reader

genre: angst, smut and a sprinkle of fluff

warnings: cheating (we do not support!), phone s*x, masturbating, mentions of genitals lmao, cursing

word count: 3.3k

a/n: this idea came to me months ago when i heard the song 'moth to a flame' by the weeknd while working lmao. and when you work in retail, you have a lot of time to think :D. i do not condone cheating in any way, i think it's vile and disgusting, but 🫣😵‍💫 i couldn't help myself with this one. enjoy!!<3

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"Hey, everything alright, sugar?"

You hiccup, "N-no. Can you come over?"

"Be there in 10." He hangs up immediately, giving you no time to even thank him. You take a look at your phone again. Your vision is blurry with tears in your eyes.

The call lasted a record time of 7 seconds. That's how long it took for you to convince him to come over. The occasion was usually a different one, but you needed his comfort more than anything right now.

You look at the contact picture, Pedri was smiling at the camera. No, he was smiling at you. The thought alone puts a smile on your face as well, but the events only hours ago catch up to you and you almost break out into tears again.

You and Pablo fought, and you normally never do. Dating Pablo Gavi was no easy task, but you loved the challenge. You loved how easy it was with him sometimes and how difficult it could get too. That's what made a relationship a relationship.

He treats you right and you feel incredibly loved by him. Maybe that's why it irked you the wrong way when one of his female friends got a little too close to him today, when your mutual friend group went mini-golfing. It only got worse when he reciprocated her actions.

"It's actually super easy, just hold the handle this way.", he explained to her, all the while you stood behind them, seeing red. She was shamelessly oggling at his biceps in front of you. In a fit of jealousy, you decided to just ignore him the entire rest of the day. Looking back at it, you may have spoiled the mood for everyone but you didn't care. You could have made a scene as well and ruined the fun straight upc but you decided to do it silently instead. Which again, was absolutely stupid, because just telling Pablo would have done the job.

He's a sweetheart, you know he never meant it that way. He never looses his temper with you either, he just calmly listens to you and talks to you; both of you finding a compromise to the problem - that's just how things between you two worked.

And that makes everything so much worse, because today he did lose his temper with you. He screamed at you, and you screamed back. Mean things where exchanged inside the car. You really don't want to know what a sight you two made.

It ended with him pulling over, after you yelled at him to stop the car. You slammed the door shut and stormed off, expecting him to follow you. He never did. Instead he raced off, leaving you in the dust.

In retrospect, you did it to yourself. Doesn't mean it didn't hurt though.

The way home took you a little more than 30 minutes and once you were inside, the tears began flooding down your face.

You hated feeling like this and you hated the fact that it was your own fault even more. You tried calling Gavi multiple times, but he didn't answer. And after an hour, you decided to stop, it was hopeless anyways. You would have to spend this awful night alone tonight, you thought.

And if God wasn't on your side that evening, the Devil definitely was. It was as if he was right by your sight, whispering sinful words into your ear. And foolishly, you listened to him.

You decided to call Pedri.

It sounds wrong, and maybe it is, but it certainly never felt that way with him. Risqué, you would describe the relationship you two have. At least that's what you always told Pedri; you liked the way the word sounded. A little french, no?

He's your boyfriend's best friend. They're teammates and Pablo told you multiple times that he even considers him a brother.

A brother you secretly slept with.

In your defense, you met him and slept with him before you and Pablo were even talking to each other. It was useless though, because you continued.

You didn't mean for it to happen, but like bananas turn to the sun and moths to a flame, you turned to Pedri.

If you're the moth, then Pedri is the flame that pulls you in and burns you. But he never lets it come so far, because he always pulls back before you can burst into flames.

This thing between you and Pedri started about a year ago, months before you even knew Pablo.

You met coincidentally one day at a match of his. Your little brother was a huge FC Barcelona fan and you gifted him front-row tickets for his 12th birthday.

They won that day and some of the players decided to sign autographs and take pictures with their loyal Culers.

Pedri was one of them.

Your brother squealed when the 19 year old football player was near you. He signed his jersey with a chuckle. "You're my idol, Pedri! Thank you so much.", your brother said politely, the excitement in his voice very evident.

"Thank you, big man. Your support helped a lot today.", Pedri said gratefully.

He looked at you then and you had admit that in person he looked even better. His big brown eyes worked like hypnosis on you and the sun did nothing to hide his beautiful tan either.

It seemed like he wanted to sign your shirt as well. You wanted to decline, you didn't need his sign but your brother beat you to it.

"My sister thinks you're handsome."

To this very day you don't know if you should thank him for introducing Pedri into your life or be angry at him for humiliating you like that in front of him.

Pedri's eyes widened. He turned to your brother mischievously, "Oh, is that so? Is she a fan as well or...does she just like my face?"

"Yes, but not as big as me of course. She and her friend talked about you on the phone sometimes. It's sooo annoying." Your brother complains nonchalantly, like Pedri was his best-bud and they just catch up with each other.

You grab your around your little brother's head and pull it close to your side, hushing him, "Anyways, good game.", you tell Pedri with a wide smile. You make a move to just leave, when Pedri holds up his pen.

"Let me sign your shirt."

You press your lips together but give in eventually, hoping that he'll just quickly move on to his other fans. He bids you goodbye with a wink and a ruffle to your brothers head.

It's only later at home that you realized that he left his phone number on your shirt. You still have it stowed away in the safety of your closet. And it will probably stay there forever.

You texted Pedri the next day. After all you couldn't come off as too easy, right?

Talking with him came easy. Conversations flowed like water and the topics just never stopped. It felt good to be with him, you felt like yourself. He listened to your every word and he made you feel special.

The two of you dated around for 5 months. You would lie if you said that these months weren't one of the most beautiful times of your life so far, but also the most hurtful ones.

Pedri travelled a lot with you, spoiled you rotten to no end and the sex(!!!). You genuinely liked his presence.

You wore your heart on your sleeve, you practically gave it to him. You two acted like a couple, like you were utterly and completely in love.

Maybe you were. Maybe it was just your imagination, because a guy showed so much interest in you for the first time.

But you two were never officially together.

Pedri never asked you to be his girlfriend. He always brought you everywhere, yet he never introduced you as his special someone.

You still wonder if Pedri never felt anything for you. Why he hesitated so much. It broke your heart, when you told him one day that you had enough. Of course he immediately understood what you meant. And the little hope you had of him finally making the last step, diffused when he said nothing more. He didn't fight for you, he let you go.

It hurt you, but for some reason it didn't break you like you initially thought it would. In fact, you and Pedri still stayed in contact. You befriended some of his friends in the time you two dated, it would've been awkward. And like you mentioned, being with Pedri was easy.

If you two could be lovers, then you definitely can be friends as well.

Things between you ended in September. In November you met Gavi.

It came a bit to a surprise to you, the wound didn't completely heal yet and Gavi was a year younger than you; you didn't go for younger guys. But Pablo was gentle, he put a band-aid over it and in January the two of you started dating.

That's also when things between you and Pedri started to become...different. In the time between the break-up and the start of your new relationship, he treated you like a good friend would. Pedri made you feel at ease and less hurt over the whole ordeal. He never hinted at anything more. The moment your relationship became public though, he started acting odd.

Suddenly he was everywhere. He stood and sat next to you whenever your little group of friends met. When you were at the beach, his eyes practically undressed you behind his shades. When you watched their training sessions, he lingered by your side too long.

No one noticed because you and Pedri always got along. You were friends. Only some knew that there may have been more, but no one knew for sure - especially not Gavi.

The real culprit however was you. Because all the while, you never said anything. You never rejected Pedri, you did nothing to push him away. It was just not in you to do that. Like it was coded in your DNA.

The cheating however started with a call one night. In a state of boredom you decided to browse through your gallery and organize it, when you stumbled across old pictures of you and Pedri.

In one you were cuddling, in the next one you were kissing. The pictures got gradually more indecent and you couldn't help but think back to when you took them. You laid on your back, naked cleavage only slightly visible. Sweat collected itself on your hairline. Next to you was Pedri, sucking on your neck, only the back of of his head visible.

You swiped right. Another intimate picture, but this time it was a mirror selfie. Not much was visible thanks to the curtains that dimmed the room, but you sat on top of him. Your nipples perked up. Pedri's hands grabbed onto your hips harshly, his head was tilted back.

You remember taking this picture very well. Pedri always said he didn't like taking them, he complained when you took this very one. In hindsight you believe he did. He posed so well on camera, you know he must have enjoyed it secretly.

You also remember how good he felt inside of you. He always managed to find the right spot to make you squeal and squirm around, stretching your cervix in all the right ways.

Heat began building up in your lower area and you couldn't help but lower your hands under your pants. The moment you cupped your vulva, goosebumps spread all over your body. It's been a long time since you touched yourself.

Being horny alters something in your brain. All at once, you can't think rationally. Essentially, you just think with your fucking dick. It just overcomes you - like a switch.

Rationally thinking you should have called your boyfriend. One look at the picture on your phone told you that that wasn't what you wanted.

A few taps later and the phone rings.

"__. It's one in the morning, is everything okay?", he answers the phone. The sleepiness in his voice was evident.

"Yeah, I just-.", a sigh escapes your mouth. Your ring finger touched around the entrance of your vagina and you can't even formulate a proper sentence. Nothing that you did right now was morally right, it was absolutely impromper. You didn't know how you were going to explain your late night call to Pedri either.

But he knew you so well. He recognized the tone in your voice immediately.

"__", his voice was hoarse. It did nothing to ease your pleasure, no, it only worsened it. "I think you got the wrong number."

"No, I don't.", you retorted.

He sounded troubled, "You should call Pablo. You shouldn't hav-"

"No, I wanted you.", you say as you add another finger to circle around your vagina. You're so wet already and so sensitive. A moment of silence passes and you press your thighs together. You didn't have the time to argue around.

Something needed to be done.

"I just found an old picture of us in my phone. You know, the ones in bed you didn't like. And I just remembered,", you closed your eyes, "I just, Pedro please do something."

You heard him shuffle on the other end.

"Fuck, what are you doing right now?"

And so he joins your little spiel.

You opened your legs and started rubbing your clitoris, "Touching myself."

"Where?"

Pedri's voice, now a lot more demanding, was still raspy from sleep and you began rubbing a bit faster. "My clit. Wish it was you", you croaked out. You started getting louder.

Pedri curses, "M'getting hard. Fuck."

You imagined what he must look like right now, lying in his bed, pants pulled down and stroking his dick desperately. You whimpered at the thought.

You loved his dick.

Honestly penises never really appealed to you objectively; they're ugly. They definitely felt better than they looked and if someone asked, you wouldn't say they were a man's nicest body part. You still liked them though.

Pedri, however, had one of the prettiest ones you have ever seen (not that you saw many). Everything from his girth to his tip to his color was so perfect. You loved sitting between his legs, crawling at his muscular thighs, while his dick was in your mouth.

A moan escaped your mouth, "Your cock always felt so good. So pretty."

You wondered if Pedri imagined you naked as well. If his thoughts were as filthy as yours were. Surely, they must have been. "Fuck, baby, I thought about your pussy so much."

"Yeah?"

"Hmm, always so good for me. No one compares."

You could here the slick sound of him pumping his dick through the phone, it was lewd. So dirty and so wrong, but you never felt better.

Rubbing your clit was not enough anymore, you needed your fingers inside of you. The sound filled your entire bedroom and you held the phone closer between your legs. "Pedro.", you moan his name. You wanted him know how he made you feel, how your body reacted just at the thought of him.

"You sound so wet, princess, just for me?"

"Yes, only you." You started kneading your boob too, imagining it to be his hand instead. "Ahh.", you cry as you hit that special spot. Pedri always managed to find it. May it be with his dick, his fingers or, your favorite, his tongue - hot and wet. He made you feel things you didn't think a human could feel.

The call didn't go on for long. You taunted and teased each other for only a little longer. Words became more slurred until the only thing left was the lewd sounds of you two moaning and whimpering into each other's ears.

You were close. Your fingers were still rapidly pushing back and forth, until everything came to a halt. You couldn’t breathe.

Your back archs backwards and your fingers were clutching at the sheets, as heat overcame your body and your orgasm washed over you. You're vaguely aware of Pedri grunting into the phone as well - too lost in your own pleasure.

And then it slowly fades away.

Suddenly you're hyper-aware of everything, as your consciousness trickled back. Your chest heaves up and down heavily.

You stared at the ceiling, guilt starting to consume you all of a sudden. You felt horrible, to say the least.

Pedri must have felt the same way, you believed. Heavy breathing was the only thing you heard on his end, when you spoke up, "Don't get me wrong. This was...amazing.", you started, searching for words. "But Pablo can't know. This shouldn't have happened, I'm sorry, I don't know what overcame me."

It took Pedri a moment to answer your word-vomit. "It's fine,__. There are always two involved, right? Let's just forget about it." The guilt in his voice was evident too, Gavi was his best friend after all.

You thought that settled it. A one-time mistake.

One time turned to two times and two times turned to multiple more calls at night, sometimes while Pablo slept next to you.

You kept the pictures of you two, and your boyfriend's bed was not the only bed you have spent your night at anymore. And he wasn't the only one spending his nights in yours either.

Just like right now.

The ringing of the doorbell rips you out of your thoughts. Pedri actually manages to be at your door in 8 minutes.

He engulfes you in a hug the moment he sees your tear-struck face. "Talk to me, what happened?", he mumbles against your hair.

You sit on your bed when you tell him of your fight with Pablo. Your stupidity that ruined everything. Pedri sits and listens intently to your worries. Occasionally he caresses your hand or hair.

"I didn't think he would get so angry with me.", you sob.

Pedri smiles at you with warm eyes. In a moment of weakness you think about what would have happened if you stayed with Pedri. Would Pedri have acted the same way?

"W-Would you have done the same?"

The question lingers in the air for a moment. You can't blame yourself for asking. Not right now, when you feel so powerless. And you can't blame Pedri for his silence either. After all, the lines are blurred already, he has to be careful with his words.

"I don't know. Probably not.", he says.

Pedri knows you good enough by now. The look in your eyes tells him everything he needs to. You were like an open book to him.

You insinuated at more, at something possible in the future. One word and you'll be his. But he shuts you down. "He's good for you.", he says then. "I see the way he makes you feel, he truly loves you,__. You deserve that. Don't worry."

He tells to you stay with Gavi; he looks you dead in the eye, while saying it. It annoys you a bit that after all this time, he still behaves the same. But he is aware of that. Because when you need him, he's always just one call away. That's all he is and may ever be.

And Pedri knows, that you are loyal to him. Your heart lies with him; in his arms.

He looks at your vulnerable state, at your glossy eyes watching him. Oh yes, your heart truly lies with him.

Like a moth to a flame, he pulls you in. And like a flame, he's fickle but destructive. And once the moth gets too close to him, it burst into flames.

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#pedri x reader #pedri fanfic #pedri imagine #pedri smut #football x reader #football imagine #football fanfic #pedri one shot #pedri fluff

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stolenslumber · 2 months

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though the stars walk backward (sjy) (part 1)

Your first encounter with Jake Sim ends with ketchup on your clothes and his burger in his friend’s lap. The second encounter doesn’t go so smoothly, either. He thinks he might have gotten the hang of it by the third time, but as the saying goes: there is no easy way from the earth to the stars.

PAIRING: sim jaeyun x female reader GENRE: college au, one-sided enemies-to-lovers (the e2l part is short-lived lol sry), friends-to-lovers, he fell first but then they both fell harder? lmao, soooooo much mutual pining, fluff, romance, jake as a star soccer player but also loser physics nerd, mc is an assistant manager on the soccer team because of Convoluted Reasons WARNINGS: swearing, familial angst/generational trauma WORD COUNT: ~11.8k a/n: lol (said with no humor whatsoever) i decided to post the first half rn and when i say "first half" what i mean is that i intended for this to come out as a complete fic instead of in parts however school is slamming me so hard and i'm contributing by ruining my own life SOOOO who was to say when this would ever see the light of day if it had to be a full fic..... anyways part 2 is like 30-40% written but i probably won't be able to work on the rest until after my semester ends so maybe may? lol (once again w/ no humor)

“Don’t freak out, but I think the girl you stare at in the library is staring back at you.”

Jake freezes with his burger halfway to his open mouth. “What? Where? And I don’t stare at her in the library—”

Jay nudges his friend’s jaw upwards. “I said don’t freak out.”

“At least he didn’t turn in her direction,” Sunghoon offers. But he says it while looking disdainfully at the ketchup dripping from Jake’s burger onto the dining hall table, so Jake isn’t all that comforted by it.

Instead, he repeats “Where?” through gritted teeth.

“At your four o’clock, but I wouldn’t get too excited about it.” Jay squints. “I’m pretty sure she’s glaring at you, honestly. Okay, seriously do not freak out, but she’s coming over here…”

Jake tries to figure out what to do with himself as you approach with alarming speed— should he fix his hair, or tuck his shirt in? Damn it, he doesn’t even remember if he’s wearing something clean today. Before he can fully comprehend it, you’re standing in front of him, looking as pretty as ever in a silky dress that floats down to your ankles.

Your mouth opens to say something, and there’s a deep furrow between your brows that Jake longs to smooth out, but then his hands clamp down on his burger, and— “Oh shit, dude, I’m so sorry!”

Bright red ketchup decorates the front of your pristine white dress.

Your jaw drops, as does your gaze, fixated on the ugly red splotch spreading over the fabric covering your stomach. Everything you’d been meaning to say to him flies out of your head, replaced by blood rushing in your ears as your anger grows at the foolish oaf in front of you. “This is dry clean only,” you hiss.

Jake drops his burger in Jay’s lap, ignoring his friend’s squawk of indignation. Hurriedly, he wipes his hands on some napkins and tries offering them to you before cowing under your withering glare. “I am so sorry,” he repeats. His arms flail at his sides before he picks up the cardigan lying next to him and hands it to you. “You have a library shift coming up, right? Please feel free to wear this until you can get home and change. I have class until two, but I can take your clothes to the dry cleaners afterwards. I’m really so sorry!”

Your mouth shapes around air a few times as you work out exactly how to respond to him, but then your phone buzzes to remind you of your library shift— it is coming up— and you decide that you’ll deal with this— and him— later. Unhappily, you grab the proffered cardigan. “Two o’clock. Don’t be late.” And then you twist on your heel and depart, leaving Jake to stare sadly at the swish of your hair against your back.

“Are you gonna take my clothes to the dry cleaners, too?” Jay intones dryly from beside him.

Jake groans and sinks back down into the booth, covering his face with his hands and shaking his head repeatedly. “I can’t believe that just happened. I have to walk into traffic now.” Before Jay can say anything else, Jake tacks on, “And yeah, give me your pants.”

“Damn, take me to dinner first. Oh, wait, I guess you did offer me food.” Jay plucks the burger out of his lap and deposits it onto Jake’s plate pointedly.

Sunghoon lets out a whistle between his teeth. “Wow, I’ve never seen anyone fumble so badly. Like, seriously, that should be studied in a lab.”

“I got nervous!” Jake exclaims.

Sunghoon chortles. “Clearly. Cute girl comes over, and you not only call her dude, but you also squirt ketchup all over her.”

Jake kicks him in the shin, hard. “Can you not pile on?”

“Sorry, sorry.” Sunghoon holds up his hands in mock surrender. “Was that the first time you interacted with her?”

Unhelpfully, Jay pipes up. “Unless you count staring at her in the library interacting, I’d say yes. Speaking of, how do you know her schedule, bro? You’re creepier than I thought.”

Jake jabs him with an elbow. “My class got canceled once and I saw her at the library then, okay? Some of us actually have homework, Socrates and Warren Buffet.” He rolls his eyes at Sunghoon (philosophy) and Jay (business) in turn. “And again, I don’t stare!”

A few hours later, Jake stares at the back of your head.

He’s not in his usual spot in the library, which is a round table near the windows on the mezzanine level— straight line of sight to one of the reference desks, but he did not pick that spot on purpose, no matter how much his friends like to joke that he did. He’s been sitting in that spot since the first day of his freshman year; he’d chosen it because he like being able to see out into the quad, and the noise level in that area is perfect for him (not too quiet, which would make him fall asleep, and not too loud, which would just make him want to join in on wherever the fun was). He couldn’t have known that you would show up halfway through last year, get a job as one of the students manning the reference desk, and then occupy the exact spot his eyes tend to rest on when he zones out.

And he really couldn’t have known that you would be so pretty.

It doesn’t help that you’re in practically all of his classes this year, and he’s had the opportunity to talk to you every day for the past two weeks if he wanted to. He’s not the most shameless person in the world (Sunghoon), but he’s also not scared of his own reflection (Heeseung), so why couldn’t he have just introduced himself like a normal person on the first day of classes and avoided this whole ketchup fiasco?

Someone comes up to the desk to ask a question, and your head tilts toward them as the afternoon sunlight frames your face just so; Jake gulps and thinks, Oh yeah, that’s why. So pretty. And dizzyingly smart, if the way he sees your pencil fly over quizzes is anything to go by.

As if sensing his eyes on you, you twist around fully to catch him staring. Jake blinks deer-in-headlights eyes at you; if this was a cartoon, there would be a ?! above his head.

Your eyes narrow at him and you jerk your head in your own direction. Get over here.

Jake gulps and straightens up before shuffling over to you. He kind of feels like he’s walking to the gallows, but on a flower-lined path, because his cardigan on you softens you around the edges, and you look right at home in it.

“Heeeeeeey.” He raises a hand and waves at you, though he’s right in front of you. He winces before you can even raise a skeptical eyebrow at him, but then you do, so he grimaces. “Sorry, that was weird. Uh, hi.”

You nod curtly at him. “Hi. I’m done in two minutes. Thanks for being on time.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world,” he mumbles to the floor. Luckily, you don’t catch it because you’re packing away the problem set you were doing in between answering student questions, which he chances a glance at because hey, he’d been having trouble with page 157.

Of course, you catch that. “What are you, twelve? Do your own work.”

“Wait, what? Hold on a second, I’m not trying to cheat off of you— hey, wait up!” He scrambles to catch up with you where you’re already halfway down the stairs. Panicked, he speeds past you and plants himself in your path, greeted by your look of supreme irritation for the second time that day. “I wasn’t trying to cheat off of you,” he says, more firmly this time. “I was just gonna ask you how you did with page 157, because I was having some trouble with it earlier.”

You scoff and slide to the left to go around him, only to be met by him mirroring you. “Are you serious right now? Get out of my way.”

“We’re going to the same place!”

“Yeah, and now I’ve remembered that I can pay for my own dry cleaning. Move.” You go right, and he follows.

“I’m still coming— I gotta take Jay’s pants there. I dropped my burger in his lap earlier when, well, you know.”

You go left again, and he follows once more. “Okay, for real? Let me go, asshole.”

Jake drops his backpack off his shoulders and hoists it onto his knee, rummaging around in it while still blocking your path. You think he’s officially lost it, but you’re also never one to miss an opportunity, so you feint to the right and then go left, but he’s faster and blocks you again with his head halfway buried in his backpack. Damn it, he’s good. You don’t realize you’ve said that out loud until he looks up at you and smiles sheepishly. “Soccer team,” he explains. Oh— that reminds you why you were approaching him at the dining hall in the first place, and real anger resurfaces in your blood.

“Like I care,” you snap. You’re about to just shove him down the stairs and call it an easy day when you’re met with a crumpled piece of graph paper waved in front of your face. “What the hell is this?”

“Next week’s problem set! See, look, I finished everything except the problems on page 157, and I did get started, but I just wanted to check if I was on the right path, okay? I promise, I wasn’t trying to cheat off of you.” He frowns. “These aren’t even graded for quality. It’s just a submission for completion.”

Your eyebrows climb up your forehead. Though his handwriting is shit, you can see that he’s telling the truth. The fact that he’s doing the problem set for next week probably should have tipped you off in and of itself, but what surprises you is the simple elegance with which his calculations come out. “Hey, how’d you do that on number 89 on page 151—” You cut yourself off. “Never mind. Fine, I believe you. Can you move now? We’re blocking the entire stairway.”

Jake seems to finally notice the build-up of annoyed students in front of and behind you both. “Right, oops.” He zips up his backpack and slings it over one shoulder before descending the stairs with quick steps. He turns around and tilts his head quizzically at you when you don’t follow.

Truthfully, you’re trying to decide if you should make a break for it and go up the stairs so you can take a different set of stairs down, but then you realize how childish that sounds. So, it’s with less dignity than you’d like that you meet him at the bottom of the staircase. But you don’t stop where he’s standing; instead, you breeze past him so smoothly that he finds himself staring at the back of your head for a few seconds before springing into motion after you.

“Soooooo… dry cleaner’s?” He offers you a tentative smile once he’s fallen into step with you.

You seem to have made your mind up about something, because you turn to him with a dazzling smile that knocks the breath right out of his lungs. “Lead the way.”

“O-Okay.” He’s taken aback by your sudden about-face, but he’s not going to question it.

He tells you that he’s happy to drive there, and you’re perfectly agreeable about it. You even start talking about the problem set that had been the source of such strife just minutes earlier. At the dry cleaner, you give him the biggest surprise yet when you ask for his number. Obviously, he gives it to you, and he has to pretend like he isn’t perturbed by the cryptic, almost manic look in your eyes when you promise that you’ll be in touch.

But then you’re gone without so much as a goodbye, and it’s only when he gets back to his place that he realizes he doesn’t even know how you got home, and he can’t text you because he doesn’t have your number.

Still. A win is a win.

ball sports (derogatory) (heeseung, jay, jake, sunghoon)

jake: this has been the strangest and possibly greatest day of my life

sunghoon: ur preaching to the choir ketchup boy

sunghoon: yizhuo told me i was hotter with blonde hair

sunghoon: so like hell yeah she thinks im hot but hell no now i have to dye my hair back

jake: ????? did i ask

jake: i’m talking about MY day

jay: she actually did not say you were hotter with blonde hair. in fact none of those words came out of her mouth

jay: you asked if she liked your new hair and she said no

sunghoon: hop off my dick tf????

heeseung: so what happened jake

sunghoon: oh i can tell u this it’s old news

sunghoon: jake fumbled his first interaction w/ the girl he stares at in the library

jake: BUT she asked for my number and said she’d be in touch!!!!

sunghoon: right so u can pay for her dry cleaning bill

jake: OR maybe she wants to be friends

jake: to lovers<3

jay: idk she kinda looked like she wanted to take you out when she was coming over to us at lunch today

jake: take me out… oh my god LIKE ON A DATE?????

jay: no like

jay: lethally

women’s rights and wrongs (you, minjeong, aeri, somi)

you: so you know how i was gonna confront jake today

yizhuo: yeah i heard that went poorly

yizhuo: sunghoon said something about ketchup????

you: nvm all that. i have a Better Plan. i’m gonna ruin his life

minjeong: cool

somi: noooooo he’s hot

you: HE RUINED MY BROTHER’S LIFE

somi: girl u have to let that go

somi: ur brother is 10 and made it to the B team for club soccer

somi: i think he’ll be fine

you: BUT HE SHOULD’VE BEEN IN THE A TEAM. I SAW JAKE’S BEADY EYES SINGLING HIM OUT UNFAIRLY

somi: he actually has like insane puppy dog eyes

you: anyways i’m going to systematically but subtly make his life more and more difficult as soon as i start assistant managing his soccer team on monday. but he will never know it’s me bc i’m going to be so nice and normal to his face BUT ACTUALLY i’m gonna make him my bitch

yizhuo: “nice and normal to his face” u have the worst poker face i’ve ever seen

minjeong: technically speaking if ur an assistant manager aren’t u THEIR bitch

For reasons you cannot fathom, the men’s varsity soccer team has practice on Monday mornings, at the crack of dawn. You’re beginning to regret giving up your reasonably timed library shifts where you basically got paid to sit there and do your homework and check out computer chargers to students every now and then, but these are the things you do when you’re trying to be a good sister.

Autumn has arrived abruptly— almost overnight, if the smattering of ambers and ochres falling from the trees lining the soccer field is anything to go by. You realize you’re dressed entirely inappropriately for the weather when your teeth are chattering and your eyes are watering from the sting of the cold. The dress you’d picked out last night for today seems laughable now.

“What are you doing here?” Jake’s voice, so unexpectedly close, makes you jolt and flail around a bit before turning to meet his confused expression— head tilted, eyes wide, and damn it, Somi’s right, he does have insane puppy dog eyes.

You gesture vaguely at the field. “I’m one of the new assistant managers. Surprise! Told you I’d be in touch.”

“Speaking of— did you get home alright the other day?”

“Yeah, of course, I just walked.”

He wants to be concerned about that answer— the closest student accommodations are at least a thirty minute walk away from the dry cleaner’s— but then he sees you hop from one foot to the other while rubbing your arms. You look so out of place with your heeled mary janes sinking into the dew-damp field with every hop, but it’s so cute that he has to bite the inside of his cheek to prevent himself from grinning too widely. In a move that now feels familiar, he digs around in his bag before pulling out a spare sweatshirt and handing it to you.

Appreciation for his kindness and irritation at his kindness play tug-of-war inside of you for all of two seconds before a particularly brisk gust of wind hits you, and then you’re yanking the sweatshirt over your head and breathing in clean soap and something else unfairly cozy. “Thanks,” you mumble.

“Sure thing. Here, take this, too.” Jake digs around in his bag some more and emerges triumphant with a thermos. He twists the cap off and pours some liquid into the cap before offering it to you.

It smells like… “Hot chocolate?”

“With two espresso shots, because we have intro to Python right after practice today.”

You grimace in unison at that reminder, and you’re kind of glad that that’s the last expression on your face before you sip at the drink, because it’s perfect, and you have to refrain from letting your eyes roll to the back of your head. So he’s practical, makes delicious hot drinks, and, because you’re not immune to those big brown eyes, attractive. It’s a pity he was such a jerk to your brother, because otherwise you’d be swooning.

But he must have seen something change in your face, because he lets out a giggle— oh no, it’s so cute— and hands you the entire thermos. “I think you need it more than me,” he explains.

You try to remind yourself of your brother’s disappointment after club soccer try-outs last week, which you had seen from your totally not-creepy position, brooding inside your stepdad’s car over how to best connect with this 10-year-old kid who was just old enough to recognize that girls had cooties and not old enough to share any genuine interests with you. It was less creepy because you were there to pick your brother up, but you feel like you’re not any closer to him than a stranger (in fairness, you hadn’t known that he existed before last year). You’ve tried, in fits and starts, to get to know MJ better, to actually form some sort of sibling bond with him, but most of the time, you’re his glorified chauffeur. He tries, too, and your heart goes all fuzzy when you notice it, but there’s only so far that a 10-year-old whose greatest joys in life are cookies ‘n cream ice cream (understandable), and soccer (more confounding) can get before he decides that his Nintendo is more readily enjoyable.

The look on MJ’s face after try-outs last week had spurred you to apply for the assistant manager position. He was so sad about the B team, and you did the whole comforting, cajoling song-and-dance as best as you could, but he had just snapped at you that you didn’t get it, that you couldn’t get it. And then he had burst into frustrated tears, and you vowed at that moment to learn everything you could about soccer, as well as to give Jake Sim a piece of your mind.

Jake Sim, whom you had only known as the guy that finished the first lab faster than anyone else in your extrasolar research methods class, until you saw him blowing a whistle on the sidelines of MJ’s soccer try-outs, looking like he had some sort of authority as he directed a group of kids, including MJ, in a series of drills. Later, you found out from Minjeong that Jake is a star player on your school’s soccer team, so he presumably has some basis for helping out with the local club soccer team, but you hadn’t been all that interested in finding out more. You’d seen enough from the way he took MJ aside after the teams had been announced, and MJ’s subsequent tears in the car, and you knew vengeance would be yours.

Unfortunately, vengeance is currently offering you hot chocolate with two espresso shots, and he is distressingly earnest when he wraps your hands around the thermos and points you in the direction of the other assistant managers who are supposed to onboard you. So, you bid Jake a stiff goodbye as you try to ignore the warmth spreading from the tip of your nose down into your throat. It’s definitely the hot chocolate, but you’re annoyed at even the possibility that it could be connected to Jake.

women’s rights and wrongs

yizhuo: so how’s world domination (ruining jake’s life) going?

you: hard to say. he gave me a sweatshirt and hot chocolate bc i’m wearing a stupid ass outfit and it’s cold as hell out here

minjeong: he said that?!

you: no I’M saying that

you: i need to change my entire wardrobe so i’m never caught unawares like this ever again. i let my guard down and this is what happens.

somi: a guy is nice to u? yeah god forbid

you: HE IS BESMIRCHING MY HONOR (AVENGING MJ)

minjeong: jeez you get so victorian when you’re distressed

somi: sorry are we ignoring the fact that he gave her a sweatshirt and hot chocolate????

minjeong: omfg YEAH that’s like. bf behavior

you: oh fuck there’s some sort of commotion going on out there in the field

you: omg they’re bringing a STRETCHER out

you: i gotta go guys ttyl xoxo etc.

yizhuo: notice how she never responded to the bf behavior allegations

Jung Sungchan, team captain, is down and out for the count after being wheeled out of practice on a stretcher with a torn ACL. This is reasonably concerning to everyone on the team, but none more so than to Jake, who finds himself at the receiving end of a Serious Talk about leadership qualities and such from his coach that ends with, “... and that’s why we want you to fill in for Sungchan while he’s recovering.”

“Huh?” Jake tilts his head at his coach. He must have misheard; there’s no way they want him to fill in for Sungchan.

“The seniors love you, the underclassmen look up to you, your peers respect you, and all the coaches agree. Sungchan will come back as soon as he’s able, but he won’t be able to actually play this season, so you’ll have to keep up the leadership on the field and off. We’re confident in your abilities. Good man.” His coach claps him on the shoulder, and that’s the end of it.

Jake is still staring dumbly in his coach’s departing direction when you approach him with his cardigan, sweatshirt, and thermos.

You had planned to just give him his stuff and leave, but curiosity gets the better of you after having witnessed the spectacle out on the field. “Everything alright? Who got carried out on that stretcher?”

Still a bit shell-shocked, Jake speaks without thinking: “Worried it was me?”

You look at him like he’s an alien species. “It clearly wasn’t, because whoever it was is much taller than you.”

Jake frowns up at you. “Okay, no need to go for the height. That was my captain, who’s gonna be out for the rest of the season, so now Coach wants me to fill in for him… I don’t know what he’s thinking. I mean, I get that seniority isn’t everything, but this feels kinda unfair to any of the seniors who could’ve stepped in for Sungchan.”

“How convenient to have everything handed to you on a silver platter,” you mutter. It’s an entirely unjustified thing to say— you barely know Jake or anything about his background, but then MJ’s tear-stained face flashes across your mind, and you don’t feel so bad about it.

Genuine hurt and a hint of actual anger sparks in Jake’s eyes. “Okay, what’s your problem? I get that I didn’t make the best of first impressions the other day, but I apologized and tried to make up for it— you can just text me the bill from the dry cleaner’s, by the way— and I don’t know what else I’ve done to upset you, but I’m sorry for whatever that is, too. Are we good, or is there something else you’ve got against me?” His last question comes out almost aggressively as he stands up, bringing him not quite chest-to-chest with you, but close enough that you notice the perfectly defined cupid’s bow of his lips, and then you’re disgusted with yourself. College hormones have made you fallible; it shouldn’t sway you that he’s cute (and kind, and smart, and considerate, your brain reminds you unhelpfully).

“We’re good,” you snap. “Here’s your stuff.” You shove the things he gave you into his arms before whipping around sharply to walk (stomp) away, pointedly ignoring his surprised yelp when your hair hits him in the face. Childishly, you think that it serves him right.

Sadly, your conscience comes back to haunt you approximately 18 hours later, at which point you’re pulling out ingredients and clanging whisks against bowls.

Minjeong sticks her head into the kitchen to ask, “What are you doing?”

You freeze in your movements, letting a particularly clumpy spot of brownie batter fall from your raised spatula back into the mixing bowl. “Cleaning,” you lie baldly. One unimpressed eyebrow raise from her gets you to clear your throat and put down your spatula. “Making brownies,” you amend.

“At midnight?”

“Yeah, I just had… a craving.”

Minjeong seems to consider pushing you on this, but the smell of the brownie batter wins her over. “Awesome, can I have some?” She moves to dip her finger into the batter.

“No!” You shriek, covering the bowl with your arms crossed on top of each other in an X.

Minjeong pulls her hand back and looks at you with alarm. “Why? What’s wrong?”

You sigh and retreat from the bowl. “Sorry, I don’t know what came over me. Um, I’m making brownies… for Jake—”

“For who now?”

“—’s soccer team,” you finish, turning to glare at Somi and her untimely entrance.

She only waves slyly at you from where she’s leaning against the doorway of the kitchen. “Y’know, it’s not really his soccer team. It’s the school’s soccer team, or maybe Jung Sungchan’s, but sure, let’s call it Jake’s, too.” She tsks. “Pretty privilege.” You give her a pointed up-and-down, to which she just shrugs.

Minjeong seizes you by the shoulders and peers aggressively into your eyes, ignoring your surprised yelp. “Why are you making guilt brownies for Jake Sim?”

“They’re not guilt brownies!” You splutter, waving your hands in front of her face as if that will stave off the gleam of interrogatory insanity in her eyes.

Drawn by her nose and her ears, Yizhuo chooses that point to wander into the kitchen, as well. “Who are the guilt brownies for?”

You groan and drop your face into your hands. Somi and Minjeong exclaim “Jake Sim!” in gleeful unison before dissolving into giggles.

Yizhuo decides to show you mercy, bless her heart, because all she does is come over to inspect the brownie batter and hum noncommittally. Of course, she ruins it when she spots what’s on the stove and gasps dramatically, “Guys, she made ganache! These are, like, mega guilt brownies!”

Back when the four of you first started living together last year, you were a mid-year transfer student whose sudden appearance had forced Somi, Minjeong, and Yizhuo’s two-room triple to turn into a two-room quad, and your guilt about disrupting their living arrangements had led you to bake them brownies from scratch— cocoa powder, chopped chocolate, browned butter, espresso, and everything. The girls had clamored for the recipe (your mother’s). Since then, you have happily moved out of the dorms and into a subsidized student apartment, but you each continue to make variations of the brownies for each other as peace offerings after a spat, or celebrations, or gestures of comfort.

And now, as an apology for being mean to Jake Sim, which is how you summarize it to your still-giggling roommates.

“Well, I’m sure he’ll like them,” Yizhuo offers, with a poorly-concealed smirk.

“They’re for the team,” you repeat.

“Riiiiiight, and is the team with us in the room right now?” Somi wiggles her eyebrows at you, then her shoulders, then her entire body, and it’s so absurd that you tear up from laughing too hard. You had moved across the country for your brother, and you hadn’t expected anything else would come out of it, but now you have the best of friends, who hold a piece of your heart, and you, theirs. The thought makes you unexpectedly emotional, so much so that you begin making another batch of brownies.

“These are just I’m really glad we’re friends brownies,” you sniffle.

Somi exchanges a look with Minjeong and Ningning, and then they’re all descending upon you in a hug; one big mess of limbs and love. It’s absolutely wonderful.

The next day, you carry multiple containers of brownies around with you all day, looking for a chance to offload them (and your guilty conscience) onto Jake. It shouldn’t be this hard— you share four out of five classes with him this semester, and you’re supposed to be at two soccer practices a week in rotation with the other assistant managers, as well as every other game. But everywhere you turn, Jake is either slipping out of class before you can get to him, or he arrives just before the professor starts lecturing and you’re already seated with your pencil poised over paper.

You’re not on rotation for practice today, so you spend a rather agitated handful of hours doing schoolwork after classes, until you get a last-minute text from your stepdad asking if you can pick MJ up.

Of course, you get the shock of your life when you get to the address your stepdad sent you and see Jake Sim playing soccer with your brother at some local park. You’re not alone in your surprise; Jake makes a full stop upon catching sight of you and gets a soccer ball to the head for it, knocking him fully down to the ground. Thankfully, he pops back up immediately, just in time to catch you speeding past him to fuss over MJ.

“What on earth are you doing here alone?!” You exclaim to your brother, looking around as if the rest of his soccer team will materialize out of thin air. “Did that bad man lure you out here?”

Jake’s eyes bulge out of his head as he looks around at the zero other people on the field before pointing to himself and mouthing Me? at you.

MJ just shrugs and points at Jake. “Practicing with Jake hyung.”

“Jake hyung?” You squint at the offender in question.

“Yeah, he’s been helping me get ready for next season’s tryouts.” MJ scuffs the toe of his shoe against the grass, clearly embarrassed by your fretting.

“Hey, Minjae, is this your… sister?” Jake asks tentatively. The question itself is innocent enough, but irritation and jealousy set your blood buzzing; MJ rarely lets you call him Minjae. He claims MJ is cooler, and he doesn’t let your mother call him Minjae, either, but your stepdad calls him Minjae freely and with an abundance of returned affection.

“Yep.” MJ pops the p as he looks between the two of you, now sensing that whatever is going on here is larger than him. “Uh, can I go to the bathroom?”

“Sure.” You and Jake respond in unison, which makes you glare and him blush.

“Okay, cool. See ya.” MJ races off to the porta-potties with unusual enthusiasm, but you suppose he’d rather be there than here to witness the breakdown of normal social interaction between you and Jake.

The instant MJ is out of earshot, you whirl on Jake and demand, “How do you know my brother?”

Instinctually, he puts his hands up in surrender. “He looked like he was pretty down on himself after club try-outs last week, so I talked to him and offered to run drills with him, like, once a week, okay? I’m not some…. bad man!”

“Oh.” You deflate in front of his eyes as you realize the depths of your misunderstanding. “Well… okay.”

He eyes you apprehensively. “We’re good?”

“Yeah, yeah, we’re… good.” The words remind you of the acerbic encounter you had with him the day before, which reminds you of the guilt brownies, which reminds you of the guilt. Like everything else in your life, you decide to get over this with clinical efficiency. “Listen, I owe you an apology. Probably several. I was picking up MJ from try-outs last week, and I saw him with you, and then he was crying in the car, so I jumped to conclusions about you and your role in the try-outs. That’s why I came over to you at lunch the other day, to tell you off.” You take a deep breath and barrel on, mindful of your brother’s likely imminent return. “I shouldn’t have assumed. I’m sorry, Jake.”

“Oh, no, that’s okay, really, don’t worry about it.” Jake rubs the back of his neck and looks anywhere but at you. He’s never seen you like this before— contrite, sincere, and concentrating so fully on him that he wants to either hide his face from you or do something even stupider, like ask you out. Instead, what comes out of his mouth is, “I think the dry cleaning is ready, if you want to go pick it up right now. With me. Or without me, I guess. I can just, like, be there. And you’ll be there, too. But we’ll be there separately. Wow, should I stop talking?”

That prompts laughter from you, and his breath catches in his throat at the wonder of watching delight unfold across your face. In that moment, sunlight emerges from behind a patchwork of clouds, but it’s your laughter that warms him from head to toe.

“Let me just drop MJ off at home, and then I’ll come with you to the dry cleaner. Together, not separately.” Your eyes twinkle in residual amusement at him, and he lets himself break out into a goofy grin.

MJ makes his presence known by loudly asking why the two of you are just standing there smiling at each other, and if Jake can walk home with you all. Jake manufactures a coughing fit and you ignore MJ’s first question, but you say yes to the second one.

MJ cheers and starts tugging Jake along in the direction of your mother and stepdad’s house. You trail behind them in bemused amusement; they talk about soccer the whole time, and Jake is playful and patient but never condescending with the boy that clearly idolizes him. Watching Jake interact with your brother is bittersweet— it’s so easy between them, in a way that you’ve never experienced yourself. By the time you reach the house, MJ has extracted a promise from you both that he can attend Jake’s next home game.

At the door, MJ fist-bumps Jake and is magnanimous enough to allow you to kiss his cheek goodbye. You send him off with a, “Be kind!” and he hollers back, “I know!”

And then it’s just you and Jake, who’s looking at you with a newfound curiosity that makes you nervous. “What?” You snap, and then you instantly backtrack. “Sorry, I, uh, I’m still a little wound up from—” thinking you were a jerk— “… earlier.”

“All good.” Jake tips his head towards the sidewalk, and you realize you’re still on the doorstep of MJ’s house. You follow Jake onto the sidewalk, where he asks, “Do you always tell him to be kind?”

It’s the last thing you expected him to ask. “Um, yeah. Not that he’s a mean kid or anything, but my mother always told me to be good, and I’ve heard her say the same thing to him, so I just… want him to hear something different.” Because be good just means be quiet and perform well, and you already go to therapy every other week for that.

Jake beams at you. “That’s awesome. You’re a great sister.”

He’s saying all the things that would be right for someone else, but for you, they’re all the wrong things. Still, there’s no way he could know that, and it’s not his fault, so you try to tone down your wince. “Thanks, but I barely know how to talk to MJ. He’s old enough to find it lame to just hang out with his sister, and we don’t have a lot in common. That’s why I applied to be an assistant manager, actually— I’m trying to learn more about soccer.”

“Sounds like best-sibling-of-the-year behavior to me. Seriously, I have an older brother— he’s the one who introduced me to soccer— and we have a great relationship, but he never joined the orchestra for me, or anything like that.” Jake nudges your shoulder with his. “And hey, if you want to learn more about soccer, you can ask me anything, anytime.”

He turns eyes so kind and earnest on you that your thought process halts and then restarts like a broken record. You have to grab onto the closest coherent thought before you stare at him for too long. “You were in the orchestra?”

Jake wrinkles his nose. “Yeah, but I was pretty average with a violin. Dumb jock, you know?” He smiles at you to let you know he’s joking.

Thankfully, you smile right back. “Soooo true. Remind me how long the first extrasolar research methods lab took you?”

He blushes and waves you off. “Ah, well, that’s the kind of stuff I want to do in the future, so I better get good at it, right?” He lowers his voice, even though there’s no one around who could possibly overhear his nerdy confession. “Honestly, I cried a little when the first images from the James Webb telescope came out.”

In equally hushed tones, you respond, “Me, too.”

Jake grins. “Aerospace engineering, right? Your brother did say that his sister loves machines and stars.”

The fact that MJ talked about you at all is enough to have you floating on air. “Yeah, that’s me. And hey, this is us.” You point to the sign for the dry cleaner.

“Oh. We got here fast.” Jake tries— and likely fails— not to sound too disappointed. But you’ve already gone ahead into the store, so he leaves behind his foolish desires (walking back to where you’d dropped your brother off and then here again, if only to spend more time with you) at the door.

In the store, Jake gives Jay’s pants a perfunctory once-over to check that they’re fine, but his attention is mainly focused on your dress— it comes back perfectly clear of any ketchup stains, to which he lets out a loud, relieved sigh.

You eye him strangely for that reaction. “I know I was a bit high-strung about it at the time, but it wouldn’t have been the end of the world if my dress was ruined. I wouldn’t, like, come after you with a pitchfork.”

He pauses for a second to let that image play out in his mind. “Y’know, I didn’t think you would, but now that you’ve brought up the possibility…” He grins when you laugh and shove lightly at his shoulder. “But seriously, it would have been a shame. You looked really nice in that dress.” The words tumble thoughtlessly out of his mouth, but he can’t bring himself to regret it when he sees your mouth part in surprise before flattening into a tiny, pleased smile.

“I would hope so. I have excellent taste,” you say, trying to sound haughty and ending up somewhere near flustered. There’s heat in your cheeks; you’re stuck between wanting to wipe that boyish smirk off of his face and wanting to frame the way it looks.

“So… are you headed back to your house?” Jake tries out what he wants to say next in his head, first: And would you mind if I walked you there?

“Oh, yeah. It’s getting kind of late. I think your friend— Sunghoon? Yizhuo invited him over for dinner tonight, actually, if you… also want to come.” You cringe at how awkward that sounded. “I mean, not that it’s going to be a big thing, or anything. Minjeong and Somi are making an insane amount of mac ‘n cheese, because there was a really good sale at the grocery store, so we’re just trying to offload it, really. There’s gonna be a bunch of people there.”

Jake’s head tilts in confusion. “Your friends live with your family?”

“What? No, we’re in an apartment on Maplewood. MJ lives with his parents, but I don’t live there.” You grimace. “I go there for family dinner once a week, so that’s where I went after we came to the dry cleaner for the first time. But that’s only on Wednesdays, thank god.”

Jake hums noncommittally. There’s more he’d like to ask, to know, to understand, but then his stomach growls, and he laughs sheepishly. “I’ll gladly take you up on the mac ‘n cheese. I need some fodder to tease Sunghoon with, anyways. Seeing him with Yizhuo always does it.”

“The will-they-won’t-they childhood-menaces-to-who-knows show?”

“Exactly. So, tell me about aerospace engineering…”

The walk to your apartment is long by any measurement, but it passes by quickly. Jake asks you genuine questions about propulsion systems and your friends, and you learn that he loves superhero movies, his family dog, and poetry, of all things. He’s endearingly bashful about the last one.

“Physics is pretty dry at the undergraduate level, even when it’s astrophysics. But the way that poets talk about the stars… It takes my breath away, a little bit. Reminds me that it’s a marvel to just look heavenward, I guess.” He rubs the tip of his reddening nose. “Silly, right?”

“Not at all.” Romantic, actually, is what you want to tell him. Romantic, because he talks about space like it’s a reverential thing, like a telescope can be a paintbrush through the night sky, like constellations are more than just sets of stars connected by the human eye. But you’ve reached your apartment, so all you say is, “Hold on, let me get my keys.”

“Oh, hey, I can help you with that—”

“No, it’s okay, I got it—”

In the fumble of dry cleaning, backpacks, sports duffels, and totes between you two, somehow every single container of brownies tumbles out of your bag. Jake’s eyes catch on the hasty letters you’d scrawled on duct tape on the lids of each container last night to distinguish between the brownies you ended up making for your roommates: FOR JS & TEAM. His eyebrows shoot up as your face burns; he doesn’t want to jump to conclusions, but…

“There was also a sale on baking supplies at the grocery store,” you lie. Then, you shake your head. “Okay, no, that’s not true. I made these last night and I meant to give them to you today but I never got you at the right moment during classes, and then there was the whole thing with MJ, so I almost forgot… Anyways. You said you were worried about the seniors on the team being upset about you for stepping in as interim captain, and I’m sure they’re not so easily swayed by just baked goods, but I thought maybe you could give these to them, as a way to, like, soften the beaches, or something. It’s not much, but I promise, they’re really good.”

Jake’s jaw drops. “You made these… for me? Even when you hated me?”

“I made them for you to give to the team,” you insist. “But, yeah… I did.” You frown at the ground. “Look, I really am sorry about the way I treated you before. I wasn’t going to, like, trauma-dump on you, but I guess I will, now, because I want you to know that I never hated you.” You take a deep breath. “MJ’s mom is my mother, too, but she left my dad and I when I was in elementary school. I didn’t hear from her for a decade, until last year, when she reached out and told me I had a brother on the other side of the country, and she had been pregnant with him when she left my dad and I.”

You chance a glance at Jake. “Please don’t look at me with pity. My dad’s a great guy, and so is my step-dad. I moved out here to be closer to MJ, and you can see how that’s going, but I love him purely, without complication. It’s just my mother who’s… complicated. Anyways, I just got MJ, so I’m a bit overprotective over him, and I was quick to paint you as the bad guy, but that’s no excuse. These are I’m-sorry-for-jumping-to-conclusions brownies. And bribe-your-team brownies.”

He shakes his head. “I’m not looking at you with pity.” It’s awe, he thinks. Awe for your heart, loyal to the point of changing schools and moving across the country for a brother you had never met. Awe for your diligence in making enough brownies to feed an entire team. And most of all, awe at your goodness, for doing all of this because you knew you were in the wrong.

“Can you look at her somewhere where you’re not blocking the doorway?” Sunghoon’s voice pierces through the strange moment. You and Jake move into action all at once, collecting containers of brownies while juggling your other things.

“Thanks for the help, dude.” Jake punches Sunghoon’s shoulder sarcastically.

Sunghoon shrugs and holds up the shopping bags in his hands. “Precious goods, my man.”

Jake peers into one of the bags. “Tiramisu?”

“Yeah, Yizhuo was on my ass about contributing to dinner.” Sunghoon rolls his eyes fondly. “She also told me to marshall the troops for the mac ‘n cheese, so Heeseung and Jay are a couple minutes behind me. Seriously, did you guys buy out the entire grocery store, or something?”

You laugh as you unlock the door and usher them inside. “Or something.” You had heard that the sale really was quite good, but truthfully, you suspect there’s more to it than that. Based on the way Somi exaggeratedly darts her eyes between you and Jake, you think you’re probably right. You get the sense that even if you hadn’t invited him for dinner, he would have shown up with Sunghoon’s contingent anyways.

“Ladies, you are so not slick,” you mutter to your friends when it’s just the four of you in the kitchen.

Minjeong smiles beatifically at you. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. This is just an impromptu but no less lovely dinner party for our friends… oh, there’s the door! I’ll get it.”

In a sense, you suppose she’s right. It’s not like Jake is the only other person at this semi-spontaneous gathering; eventually, there are almost 20 people eating mac ‘n cheese on various surfaces in your apartment. It’s an eclectic bunch— pretty much anyone you or your friends knew who was available to come eat mac ‘n cheese. But Minjeong insists that you and Jake share an armchair in the living room because there’s nowhere else to eat, even though there is clearly an open chair next to Heeseung and a free spot on the rug next to some kid from your programming class last year.

“This is really good!” Jake enthuses. He says it while shoveling food into his mouth, so it sounds more like Vif iv weally good! He’s also eating with his non-dominant hand to keep from spilling anything on you where you’re pressed up against each other in the armchair, though that turns out to be fairly counterproductive because he keeps missing his mouth with the fork.

Your head tips back in a fit of giggles. “You look ridiculous,” you inform him. He just grins at you with chipmunk cheeks stuffed with tiramisu. “Here, let me.” You take the fork from his hand and feed him a mouthful; it’s much more efficient this way, you reason to yourself.

He’s so startled by this that he starts choking on the dusting of cocoa powder atop the dessert. You end up thumping him on the back until his airway is clear again, and he hopes you chalk up the redness of his face to the choking.

“Um, you have a little…” You motion to a spot of cocoa powder at the corner of his mouth. He wipes at entirely the wrong corner, and you’d think he was doing this on purpose, except he starts choking again when you use your thumb to wipe the powder away.

He gets over it much more quickly this time, though. Once he’s finally back to normal, he wills himself to summon all— or any— of the charm he has ever possessed to turn warm eyes on you. “Thanks for inviting me here tonight,” he says. There’s a slight rasp to his voice that is probably due to all the choking, but he hopes you think it’s sexy, or something.

“Oh, it’s no big deal. Thanks for helping us eat the food, and for, uh, coaching MJ, I guess?” Your voice is approaching a squeak, which makes you want to die, a little bit. He’s just looking at you so sincerely.

His gaze holds yours. “Easy day. And hey, you’re totally welcome to come join us whenever you want. I was just gonna keep meeting him at that park, so you know where to find us.”

“Thank you,” you repeat, quieter this time. “My mother… she’s hard on him. Always be good, be the best, you know? So he was pretty torn up about not making the A team.”

“I kinda sensed that he was tense during try-outs. Not that it’s bad to try hard, or to want to be on a certain team, but at his age, he could benefit from just… having fun, I think. If you don’t mind me saying that.”

You nod. “Believe me, I agree. MJ’s way too serious for his own good.”

“Some may say he gets it from you,” Jake teases lightly.

“Some may say that’s not how genetics work, but we’ll leave that to the pre-meds.” You tip your head toward Yizhuo, who is arguing about some memory from hers and Sunghoon’s childhood with him. Your heart glows with contentment as you look around the room; all of your favorite people (plus or minus miscellaneous others) gathered in one place on a random Monday night.

Jake carves out a piece of his tiramisu and holds it up to you like a toast. “To the pre-meds. And old friends, and new ones.”

“And new ones,” you echo.

As it turns out, the soccer team is exactly as easily swayed as a container of brownies.

You’re at practice when it winds down and Jake holds up your stack of containers like Simba in that one scene in The Lion King. “A gift from the lady,” he intones grandly to the team gathered in front of him. You nudge him with your hip. “Okay, and me, I guess, but seriously, she did all the work. Listen, guys, I’m not gonna lie— it’s gonna be rough without Sungchan. But I believe in us, and I believe in these brownies!”

“Brownies!” The team roars back. Said brownies are demolished in a matter of minutes, and then every player makes it a point to sing your praises and give Jake a hug or a fist-bump on their way out.

You’re still gaping by the time it’s just you and Jake left on the field. “That’s all it took?”

Jake turns to you with his arms crossed smugly over his chest. “Hmm? Oh, yeah. The way to the heart is through the stomach, and all that.”

“Otherwise known as: men are so easy.” You bemoan all the fancy ingredients and time you put into those brownies; you’re sure the team would have been just as happy with boxed Betty Crocker.

“Yeah, but these taste like care and love,” he insists.

“Alright, buddy, I wouldn’t go that far. And how would you know? You haven’t even tried one yet.”

“Oh my god. You’re right.” Jake looks aghast. “Are there any left?!”

You make a show of looking around at all the empty containers around you. Jake’s face falls so comically and he pouts so fervently that you can’t keep up the ruse for long. Laughing, you pull out one last ziplock bag of brownies from behind your back and present it to him. “Saved one just in case.”

He plucks the bag out of your hands with exaggerated delicacy, which vanishes when he bites into the brownie and lets out an honest to god moan. Heat floods your face immediately.

His eyes are closed when he tells you, quite seriously, that you are a goddess amongst mortals. “Did you drug this? I feel like I’ve ascended to a new plane of existence.” He moans, again, eyes still closed.

“Hello, stop making that sound, you weirdo,” you hiss.

He cracks one eye open to wink at you. “Where is your mind? Get out of the gutter, ma’am. Ow, okay, I get it!” He jumps away from your jabbing elbows. “Seriously, these are incredible. You could make money off of them.”

“You’re just saying that because you want me to make them again, for free.”

“Will you?”

“... Maybe if you let me look at how you got to your answer on number 89 on page 151.”

Jake’s hoot of delight carries you all the way to the library, where he shows you his usual spot and apologizes for ever making you uncomfortable with his staring— it’s just that you used to occupy the spot to which his eyes zoned out.

You give him a blank stare of your own. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I never noticed that you sat here. Or that you stared.”

Jake’s blush starts from the bridge of his nose and spreads out across his cheeks. “Oh, well, that’s good, I guess.”

“But I can sit next to you now, and you can stare all you want,” you offer jokingly.

His blush only intensifies. “Nope, that’s fine, I’ll just keep zoning out at whoever they replaced you with at the reference desk. Great, it’s… Huening.” He waves unenthusiastically at the lanky boy.

“Who?” You squint at your replacement.

“Huening Kai. He’s on the basketball team with Heeseung.”

“Are all of your friends athletes?”

“Not all, but most of them, yeah. Sunghoon and Jay are doubles partners on the tennis team, and they were roommates with Heeseung and I, respectively, so that’s how we all became friends. But I’ve got other friends in the physics department. And now, you.” Jake smiles softly at you, letting the words linger in the air for so long that your pulse starts to pick up speed.

“So, this is the famous staring, huh?” You mean for the words to come out friendly and light, but instead they come out low and musing.

“The one and only.”

“Hmm. It doesn’t make me uncomfortable, if that’s what you’re wondering.” And you mean it. His gaze is warm and easy, like the blanket a loved one draws up over your shoulders when you’re half-asleep.

Confidence returns to him like a boomerang as the corner of his mouth tips up in a smirk. “Are you giving me permission to stare at you?”

“Five minutes of staring for every problem you let me look at in your notebook.”

“We’re bargaining now?” He tsks and pulls out his work, though his shoulders are shaking with laughter. “How about this: you can look at my notebook for as long as you want, if you let me do the same for yours.”

“That’s just called working together, Jake.”

“Sure, but I also get to stare at you.”

“Tough deal for me.” But you’re staring at him, too, and there’s something hesitant and wanting brewing in your chest. It goes away when you clear your throat. “I’m feeling benevolent today, so I’ll allow it.”

Two hours pass by as you work on problem sets in companionable silence. He does stare at you more often than is perhaps necessary, but half of the time it’s because he really is zoning out. The other half… well, just because you’re friends now doesn’t mean you stopped being pretty.

When you finally decide to call it quits, it’s almost 8pm, and both of your stomachs are growling loudly. Jake yawns and stretches leisurely, like a large puppy. You’d laugh at the sight if you weren’t so transfixed by the ripple of a toned stomach exposed by his stretching. Suddenly, you remember that the soccer team does strength training for an hour every other day, and Jake is no exception.

Thankfully, he’s too busy complaining about being hungry to notice your wandering eyes. “Ugh, I think the dining hall is closing now. I have ramen back at my place, if you wanna—” Jake cuts himself off abruptly as he realizes the innuendo behind his words. “I mean, not like that. You probably have food at your apartment, what am I even saying, haha!” His voice goes high-pitched towards the end.

Mercifully, you ignore his slip-up. “Yeah, actually, we still have mac ‘n cheese left, so I’m probably going to microwave some of that. You’re welcome to take some home with you, if you want.” You shake your head immediately after the words come out of your mouth. “What am I even saying? You have ramen back at your place.”

And then you’re back at square one, both staring at each other with wide eyes and heat creeping up your necks.

Jake is the first to break the silence with peals of laughter that dissolve into giggles. You’re not far behind, and it isn’t long before Huening is glaring at the two of you and miming zipping his lips shut.

The two of you make your way out of the library still giggling, but right outside the library doors, Jake asks if he can walk you home. There’s a shy, boyish look on his face when he asks; it stirs up that strange, stumbling desire in you again.

“I really don’t live that far,” you murmur.

“I’m trying to get my steps in,” he jokes. He knows you saw him running back and forth across the field for two hours during practice today.

“I really don’t live that far,” you repeat, already starting in the direction of your apartment. When you don’t hear him follow, you turn around and quirk an eyebrow at him. “Aren’t you coming? Can’t have the star player missing his steps.”

He grins and catches up to you quickly, and then he spends the next ten minutes badgering you for more compliments. You have never felt so warm on the walk home.

Just as promised, you let MJ come to the next home game. It’s your first game as an assistant manager, so between keeping an eye on MJ and keeping an eye on your actual responsibilities, you’re pretty frazzled before the game even starts.

You’re settling MJ into a spot on the bleachers when someone taps your shoulder. You turn around to gasp at the sight of Jake. “Your hair!” The jet-black strands are no more; his hair is now a silvery-tinged blonde.

His smirks as he runs his fingers through his hair. “Team bonding thing we do every year. Jay did it for me this time, though, so it looks better than it normally does.” He crouches down to MJ’s seated level. “Hey, buddy, be kind and stay put for your sister, alright? She’s got a big job today.”

MJ stands up and nods solemnly, then salutes Jake with two fingers that turn into finger guns. The whole display is so ridiculously adorable that everyone around you in the bleachers laughs.

Jake repeats the gesture back at MJ through his own giggles before straightening up and turning to you. “Feeling nervous?”

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

“Nah, the playing is easy. Well, it’s not easy, but it’s second nature. I actually find it harder watching from the sidelines, not having any control over the action.” He peers closer at you. “Are you nervous, assistant manager?”

“A little,” you admit. “I still feel like I don’t know much about soccer.”

“MJ could explain everything to you, right?” Jake high-fives your brother. “Sadly, he can’t be with you on the sidelines, but do you see that cat-looking guy over there?”

You squint in the direction Jake points in— a group of his teammates milling around on the sidelines. The cat-looking guy sports amateur-ish frosted tips which make you suppress a chuckle, but he’s easy enough to spot. “Yep, I see him. And the consequences of not having Jay around to dye your hair.”

Jake lets loose a burst of tiny giggles. “He tried his best, okay? And his name is Jungwon. Freshman with a lot of potential, but he sprained his ankle yesterday, so he’s sitting a few games out. He can tell you anything you want to know during the game.” Jake holds his pinky out to you. “You’ll be just fine. I’ll see you after the game, yeah?”

You’re speechless as you nod and wrap your pinky around his. It’s not clear to whose benefit this promise is, but your heart is tap-dancing in your chest at the realization that he came up to the bleachers just to reassure you about the game and ask to see you later.

He releases your pinky and is halfway down the bleachers before you muster up your words to yell at his back, “Good luck!”

When he turns around, he’s beaming. “Don’t need it! You’re here, aren’t you?” Then he’s off to be with his team, and there are people whispering all around you, but all you can do is smile stupidly after him.

“You guys are acting weird,” MJ declares.

“So weird,” Sunghoon agrees.

His sudden appearance makes you yelp. “Sunghoon? When did you get here?”

He wiggles his eyebrows at you. “Just in time to see that whole display.” He points his thumb behind him. “Yizhuo’s just getting snacks from the car. I know you wanted her to watch MJ during the game— do you mind if I tag along? I wanted to see Jake exercise authority as captain, anyways. It’s gonna be hilarious.”

“Knock yourself out. Hey, MJ, this is Sunghoon, one of Jake and Yizhuo’s friends. He’s on the tennis team, so don’t give him too much of a hard time for doing that instead of soccer, okay?” You ruffle MJ’s hair. “I’m gonna go, but I’ll see you after the game. Be kind!”

“I know!”

Down at the sidelines, you meet Jungwon and the rest of the players not in the field today. You’re tentative at first about asking Jungwon questions, but you find that he’s an enthusiastic— and entertaining— commentator. It isn’t long before the other players are clamoring to give you the low-down on what’s happening out on the field, as well as all the latest team gossip.

“... and that’s why Jisung’s girlfriend is ignoring him,” Sohee explains as the first half of the game comes to an end.

“Should you be telling me this?” You laugh, but the question is somewhat genuine.

Beomgyu pats your shoulder. “There are no secrets on the team, and you’re part of the team now!”

“There are no secrets on the team because everyone is a nosy little shit,” Jake says loudly from behind you.

As one, you and the other players turn to face him.

“Heeeeeeey, cap’n!” Jungwon salutes him with a cheeky grin.

Jake eyes him with suspicion. “You’re not scaring off our new assistant manager, are you? We just got her.”

Mischief glints in Jungwon’s eyes. “Absolutely not. We were just telling her about Jisung’s girlfriend. We can move on to talking about the girl you stare at in the library, instead, if that’s better—”

Jake shuts him up with a (light) slap over the head. “No need, thanks!” The blush blooming over his cheeks is not lost on the team, who giggle like schoolchildren.

“The staring really is famous,” you muse out loud.

“I just came over here to make some substitutions,” Jake huffs. Then, like he can’t help it, he shoots you a small smile. “You doing alright?”

You salute him like Jungwon did. “No complaints, captain.” To your delight, he appears flustered by the title coming out of your mouth.

“O-Okay, so Beomgyu, you’re gonna sub in. Wonbin, too, and…”

The second half of the game goes by in a flash; before you know it, Jake has assisted Beomgyu in scoring the final goal, and your team wins 2-1. The crowd is jubilant, and you’re more animated about the win than you had expected. You join in on all the cheering and applauding with enthusiasm to rival that of MJ, whose screeches of delight you can hear all the way down the bleachers.

You can’t even try to look for Jake at first— every player seems to have welcomed you into their hearts now, so you’re bombarded with a chorus of congratulatory hollers and See you tomorrow! and Thanks for the advice! as they gradually leave the field.

You’re reassuring Anton that it’s not embarrassing to go to the writing tutors at the library for help when Sunghoon and Yizhuo approach with MJ skipping in between them. Anton thanks you profusely before running off to the locker room, and then MJ is talking your ear off about how cool the game was. In between his exclamations, you thank Sunghoon and Yizhuo for staying with him.

“MJ’s pretty cool. Text me anytime you need someone to hang with him during a game,” Sunghoon offers. “Or Heeseung or Jay. We come to these pretty often, since we’re all on our off seasons right now, so there’s usually one of us here.”

You smile genuinely at him. “That’s really nice of you, Sunghoon. Thank you.”

Yizhuo tsks. “Men do the bare minimum.” She ignores Sunghoon’s half-hearted protests and kisses your cheek in farewell. “We have to go— double date. I’ll see you at home!”

You wave goodbye with equal parts amusement and bemusement, and then you turn to the field. At this point, MJ has run off to play with the few stragglers still kicking a ball around, so you watch them for a few minutes with a content smile on your face.

“Hey.” Jake sidles up to you without a sound and then chuckles when you jump in surprise.

You swat at his shoulder halfheartedly. “You just missed Sunghoon. He and Yizhuo are going on a… double date.”

“With each other? Or, like, they’re each going with someone else?”

“Y’know, it wasn’t clear.”

“Man, I’ll have to interrogate him when he gets back. But besides that… how’d you like the game, lucky?” Jake looks expectantly at you.

“I think I understood, like, 60 percent of the game, which is pretty good if you consider that I was probably at 10 percent before today.” You give him the same look. “What does ‘lucky’ refer to? Is that some kind of soccer slang?”

He looks away and runs a hand through his hair, suddenly bashful and bambi-eyed. “No, it’s just me being dumb, I guess. This is the first game we won this season, and it’s the first one you were at, so you’re like… a lucky charm.”

There are many things you could say. Correlation doesn’t equal causation, for one; every fledgling scientist knows this. And there has only been one other game this season, so your data set is quite sparse to begin with. Instead, all that comes out of your mouth is a slightly skeptical but mostly teasing: “I thought you said you didn’t need luck. And what if I was here and you lost instead?”

“Then I would’ve been lucky just to see you on the sidelines,” Jake murmurs.

You are not usually moved by sentiment. But this one is so sweet and sincere tripping off his tongue, delivered with those warm brown eyes; once again, you’re rendered speechless by Jake Sim.

Beomgyu coughs loudly, thoroughly dispersing the pink clouds you half expect to see floating around you and Jake. “Sorry to interrupt,” Beomgyu snickers. “But I think your brother is ready to go home.” He points to where MJ is slumped over on a bench, eyes droopy and hair sticking to his forehead.

The sight makes you smile fondly. “He’s had a big day. We’ll get going, then. Bye, guys!” You wave to the rest of the players on the field and get a few hollers in return as you and Jake walk over to MJ, who seems to have nodded off completely by now.

He looks so young like this— and so peaceful that you don’t want to wake him. You’re debating how to get MJ home with the least amount of disturbance possible when Jake solves the problem for you by crouching down and putting MJ on his back.

“Did you drive here?” Jake asks you in a whisper.

“Yeah,” you whisper back.

Jake hoists MJ further up on his back and secures his arms under the little boy’s legs. “C’mon, I’ll take him to your car.”

He starts walking in the direction of the parking lot, but you’re stuck in place, struck by the sight of Jake moving so slowly, careful not to disturb MJ’s sleep. Here is this guy you lambasted endlessly in your mind and multiple times to his face, all because of an assumption you made, and he’s holding your brother like a treasure. The sight makes your heart ache with inexplicable tenderness.

Dusk bleeds into night as the stars peek out across a velvet sky, and the poets would say that the stars bear witness to this— the moment when that stumbling, hesitant desire in you begins to bloom into full-bodied love.

But you will not realize this until much later, because the heavens are fickle, and there is no easy way from the earth to the stars.

#enhypen #jake sim #sim jaeyun #enhypen x reader #jake sim x reader #enhypen fluff #enhypen oneshot #jake x reader #jake fluff #jake fic #jake oneshot #fic: though the stars walk backward #ss.fic

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evilwickedme · 4 months

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hey it’s me from the Batman posts! (the one that left the tags abt wanting to get into Batman but having no clue where to start)

If its not too much trouble, I’d love any advice on where to start with Batman or Batfam(?) stuff, I saw someone suggest reading the Batman: Wayne Family Adventures thing on webtoon as an intro to the characters so I’ve been doing that, but I’ve got no clue about any of the official comics or shows/movies/etc. I’ve never read a comic series before so everything is super new to me.

I know different series(?)/versions(?) can be wildly different bc of different writers and stuff, I definitely trust your taste on what would be good / enjoyable bc the posts you’ve been reblogging are like 90% of whats gotten me interested in the first place

Thank you, and absolutely no rush!!

Hey I am legit SO happy that you sent me this ask this is literally my favorite thing to do!!!!

So to start with I do actually agree that wfa is a good starting point but for a different reason than I feel most people would recommend it. The thing about wfa is that it has a consistent design for every character, is humorous, touches not only on the main batfamily members but also many extended members, other noteworthy people in Gotham, and the batfamily's cast of friends and teammates as well. This means that while its approach to characterization is incredibly fanon-y, it's a good basis for how to continue. You read wfa, and you know that Dick is the first robin, wears ridiculous costumes, was batman for a bit, is nightwing, part of the teen titans... this isn't a lot, but it's just enough to orient yourself before jumping into some of the most convoluted art ever created, aka the comic world.

Another tip I'm gonna give you is to let yourself be confused. I think the people who end up sticking with comics are people who are aware that if they pick up a comic it's very likely the writers and artists have read and worked on comics that you haven't read yet or even heard of, so you're always going to be missing something. That's fine. If something is really important to the plot, it gets explained; if it's not, it's windowdressing. Often there'll be little boxes saying what comic and issue they're referencing, so if you find it interesting you can just go read it - otherwise, if it's not there, you can google it, or go to any comic fan and ask "hey do you know what this is about?" and if they know, they will answer. There is nothing a comic fan wants more than to explain how to get into their favorite character/s, trust me.

Anyway this has been a very wordy intro but here are some potential starting points for the batfamily!

Bruce Wayne

You know who he is. Pick up an issue of Batman or Detective Comics and he's there. Pick up an issue of any other DC comic and there's like a 30% chance he's there too.

Batman: The Long Halloween

Noir style, investigative, early in batman's career, two face's origin story

It has a sequel-ish story called Batman: Dark Victory that's almost as good

Batman: Hush

Batman: Year One

Frankly there's not going to be much information in this comic you don't already know, but also, it's a classic, so might as well

Batman: A Death in the Family & Batman: A Lonely Place of Dying (crossover with the new teen titans)

First story is Jason's death, second is Tim's introduction and arguably the start of the batfamily being a family

Tim drags Dick back into the fray in ALPOD. It's just sort of the kind of thing he does

Do NOT confuse A Death in the Family with Death OF the Family, which is a much newer story, and Not Good

Batman: Under the Red Hood

Jason's villain arc! More details below

Batman himself isn't actually my favorite but you know he's got some decent stuff since he's, uh, the main character. DC doesn't have a multiverse the way Marvel does - and getting into that would be a whole separate ask - but their elseworlds are stories about the characters in different situations. Some ones I've heard good things about include Gotham by Gaslight, Dark Knights of Steel, Batman: Last Knight on Earth, and I keep meaning to get into Batman: White Knight, which is a whole other universe on its own. I've been trying to get into more modern batman stuff and unfortunately I just haven't clicked with anything.

Dick Grayson

Guy has been in a lot of things. If you read a random Batman comics from before 1980, there's a good chance he'll be there.

Teen Titans and The New Teen Titans and Titans (1980s-2000s)

I haven't read enough of these to say much of anything, but he's a founding member of the TT

Nightwing

His post-Robin superhero identity. At first only present in NTT and occasional Batman comics, but eventually he gets his own miniseries in the early 90s, followed by an ongoing. Recently-ish started reading them and they're angsty and very 90s in a lot of ways but I'm enjoying it

Modern Nightwing titles also exist. For sure.

Batman & Robin by Morrison

In one of DC's ten million crises, Bruce "dies", and after a short story called Battle for the Cowl, Dick ends up becoming Batman. Damian is his Robin. It's an interesting time for batman comics, although not necessarily the best writing that Dick has ever gotten.

Batman: The Dark Mirror

Also a great story for the Gordons. Bruce is back from the dead, but Dick is still Batman in Gotham. This was my first even Batman comic and it's really good.

Obviously there's other stories, such as Grayson, where he becomes a super spy for a bit. There's a million and a half reading lists for Dick out there as he's a massively popular character and he's one of the characters DC is pushing the most right now. As with all the rest of these, these are good entry points; from there I trust you to find your way

Barbara Gordon

The original Batgirl, sort of (nobody really brings up bette kane unless they're pointing out that babs wasn't the original Batgirl, she's just not important). She appears sporadically in silver and bronze age batman comics and detective comics, but she quits being Batgirl shortly before being raped and shot in the spine by the joker in Batman: the Killing Joke, which I purposefully did not put on my rec list.

Birds of Prey

Babs-as-Oracle at her best.

Batman: The Dark Mirror

Babs' long lost brother comes back to town. It's fucked up.

I've been reliably told to stay away from her Batgirl runs - most people who are a fan of the character don't like that they retconned Oracle away and it's mostly not very well written. There's a comic called batgirls that lasted about a year that included her, and it's okay.

Jason Todd (my beloved)

MY MAN

Batman: Second Chances

Collected edition of Jason as Robin, so much fun. Extremely silly at times since it's the 80s.

Batman: A Death in the Family

For obvious reasons.

Then he's just sort of dead for 17 years. He shows up in heaven in a Green Arrow issue and is occasionally brought up or shown as a hallucination, but that's about it.

Batman: Under the Red Hood

There's a new crime lord in town and he's so smart and talented and hot omg I wonder who he is!!!!

The collected edition also comes with the annual that reveals how he came back to life

Task Force Z

This shouldn't be as good as it is.

Jason gets recruited to work with a team of undead villains

Jason gets called a hot a bunch of times, and is shirtless a lot. This doesn't matter but you know, like, yeah it does.

For Robin!Jason there's also Batman: The Cult - which I finally got my hands on recently but haven't read yet. For Red Hood!Jason there's lots of stuff, but most of it isn't very good or is actively bad. Most people will tell you to stay away from Red Hood and the Outlaws, and they're right, although the 2016 run is better. Most people will tell you to read Batman & Red Hood: Cheer, and they're wrong, it's ass.

Tim Drake

Frankly this boy has no flops. Or very close to it.

Batman: A Lonely Place of Dying

Tim figured out who Batman and Robin are at AGE NINE. Respect.

After this he appears in various Batman and detective comics issues, I haven't read any of these.

Robin

The first Robin to get his own ongoing! Like with Nightwing, it started with a miniseries (a few of them, actually) and got turned into a long running series from there. Lasted like 200 issues, too.

Tim FUCKS.

Not Steph's first appearance, but most of her appearances pre-2009 are in this series.

Young Justice 1998

It's insane in all the best ways. Cars have sex on panel. They play baseball to save the world on an alien planet. A power of friendship speech prevents the end of the world. In the first issue, a woman develops breasts so big she falls on her face.

This team eventually breaks apart and Tim along with 3 other teen heroes nicknamed the core four (Superboy, Impulse, & Wonder Girl II) become part of Teen Titans 2003, which I haven't read and is also a bit of a flop era fashion wise for everyone anyway. I do have the volume of TT03 where they meet the versions of themselves from the future and I plan on reading that soon-ish.

In the mid 2000s basically everyone Tim loves dies. Steph died in 2004 ish after a very short stint as Robin. Tim's mom dies, then his dad is murdered, and it's unclear what happened to his step mom, but she was in Bludhaven, which had an atomic bomb dropped on it. Impulse becomes kid flash becomes the flash becomes murdered, and superboy gets killed while saving the world. Steph does turn out to not be dead after all and Impulse and Superboy come back from the dead eventually but by God he's having a tough year BEFORE Bruce "dies".

Red Robin 2009

After Bruce "dies" and Dick becomes Batman, Dick makes Damian his Robin and nobody believes Tim that Bruce is still alive, so he steals the Red Robin costume and goes on a mission to save his dad!

Not a comic to read first because it's so uncharacteristic of Tim as a person, but definitely something to read as soon as possible, because it's ridiculously good.

After flashpoint/n52 Tim doesn't have his own ongoing for a while, but he does come out as bisexual in an early issue of Batman Urban Legends (2021) and he got his own ongoing called Tim Drake: Robin in 2022 which was ugly AF and yet cancelled far too soon. There's a Young Justice run from 2019 I haven't read yet.

Stephanie Brown

For her I would go to Google, bc I haven't gone down the rabbithole enough for her yet. I know her first appearance was in a batman comic where she became spoiler to spoil her dad's plans - her dad being a third rate villain called the cluemaster - and she almost kills him, so good for her. Afterwards she appears every once in a while in various comics, most notably in Robin, where she and Tim as Robin start dating despite him knowing her identity but not the other way around.

Robin 60s (I don't remember the exact issues)

Steph gives birth and gives her baby up for adoption

Robin 126-128

Steph becomes Robin when Tim quits for his still-alive-but-not-for-long dad.

War Games

Steph does a fucky wucky and accidentally starts a gang war which gets her killed

There's another Robin arc where she comes back and it turns out she was never dead, Leslie (the family doctor) simply faked her death and sent her to Africa to recover

Batgirl 2009

Her first and only solo ongoing, but it's really good

She also appears a lot in Cass's Batgirl ongoings, and occasionally shows up in yj98. Her most recent series in Batgirls, which isn't very good but her interactions with Cass are very gay, and we've all been shipping it for 20 years at this point, so frankly it's long overdue. Unlikely to become canon tho, unfortunately.

Cassandra Cain

She doesn't use a lot of words, so neither will I. Probably.

No Man's Land

Frankly I am terrified to read this, it's so many goddamn issues, but this is her first appearance. I have one "volume" and it's as big as the fucking Bible.

Batgirl 2000

She's the first Batgirl to get an ongoing. The one from 2008 I've been reliably told isn't very good. She's absolutely terrifying in the 2000 one, I approve.

Outsiders 2016

Supposed to also be good for Duke content. I think at this point she's going by Orphan? Idk she's had a lot of names.

Idk I prefer Black Bat

Spirit World

Mini series that recently ended. Soooooo good. Alyssa Wong is a top contender for favorite modern writer.

She's mostly a background character. Bc DC is both sexist AND racist. She was also in batgirls.

Damian Wayne

Frankly he's my least favorite of the batkids, but that's not his fault, he's been a victim of a lot of really racist writing.

Batman: Son of the Demon

Somehow both his origin AND an elseworlds that doesn't count. Not required reading, but Bruce and Talia are madly in love in this.

Batman by Grant Morrison

After UTRH and before Dick was forced to become Batman Morrison reintroduced Talia's son, who in this version was a rape baby bc apparently brutalia weren't in love and Talia drugged Bruce. Fucking fine, I guess.

His character growth during his time as robin is sweet tho.

Robin 2021

His only solo ongoing, pretty good

Super Sons

He had two team up comics with then fellow child Jon Kent, son of superman, and it was fucking adorable. Then they aged up Jon to 17, so they're still friends, but Jon has his own shit going on.

Duke Thomas

He's REALLY new, and I haven't read any of it, I'm sorry.

Robin War

Batman and the Signal - I finally got my hands on the first issue of this last week!

The Outsiders 2016

Frankly they should capitalize on the Duke & Cass friendship/siblingship more often.

Alfred Pennyworth

I haven't read it, but there's a series called Pennyworth about his days as a spy for the crown. Supposed to be pretty good.

Kate Kane

The Jewish lesbian batwoman of our dreams

Batwoman: Elegy

Her introduction

Also, it's written by Greg Rucka, and if he can do one thing, it's write sapphic women. I'm not even joking.

Get the newer edition that has both of her original Rucka stories

Batwoman ongoings

She's had a couple, they're both supposed to be pretty solid, I've only read a few issues here and there

Batman in other media

Animated: I'm currently watching Batman the Animated Series for the first time and it seems to really get Bruce as a character, even if Robin will be there one episode and his existence will be a plot hole in the next. The Justice League animated series has also been fun so far. Teen Titans have gotten a number of animated adaptations all of which have pretty strong followings. There's an animated show called "Young Justice" which is a Teen Titans show and I refuse to watch it (it has a very devout following, but all that means is that the Young Justice - All Media Types tag on ao3 is just the same as Young Justice Cartoon and I have to filter heavily when looking for yj98 fics). Lego Batman is a REALLY fun film, and I think it turned into a whole franchise.

Live action TV: I have watched the first season of both Titans and Gotham, but both of those were before I was into the batfamily as a concept. My impression of Titans is overall negative and my impression of Gotham is overall positive.

Live action movies: There are so many Goddamn Batman movies. I like the Dark Knight Trilogy, but even calling it "based on" the Dark Knight comic trilogy is giving it a lil more credit than it deserves. The Batman 2022 is massively popular with the comic fandom for a reason - I'm not a big fan of it, but I did enjoy laughing at the movie so at least there's that. Batfleck sucks. I haven't seen anything else, up to and including the Joker movie. Oh, and Birds of Prey was really good, but that's not Cass.

Video games: The Arkham trilogy is well loved and I have indeed just bought it, but I haven't gotten to it because I'm currently working on Gotham Knights and uh. Okay so listen. This game is a lot of fun and I will be finishing it. But it's like. Got a massively antisemitic plot point. I can't even say I don't recommend it, I'm genuinely enjoying the game a lot. But I've never seen anybody bring this up, and it's bugging me.

ANYWAY I'm sure I've missed a LOT but this is introductory so you know I'm giving myself grace. There's characters I completely skipped and I'm sure mega fans of characters I haven't read much of will be offended that I said such and such about them but you know it's only been about a year and a half since I started reading dc comics and I'm still figuring it all out. And I probably will still be figuring it out for the next decade. To me that's actually part of the fun of it.

#batman #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #stephanie brown #barbara gordon #cassandra cain #damian wayne #kate kane #duke thomas #alfred pennyworth #batfam #dc #reading list #gail speaks #ask #fageles

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d4yl1ghts · 26 days

Text

be careful

mark sloan x pregnant, fem!reader

summary: you end up at seattle grace when you accidentally burn your hand whilst cutting and so your boyfriend patches you up

warnings: injury, pregnancy

A/N- i only realised halfway through that i was foreshadowing the plane crash i swear 😭

You hummed along to the song that was playing on the radio as you cooked yourself some spaghetti bolognese. Your baby was craving some spaghetti right now. You were currently thirty weeks pregnant and so were off work for now. Usually you would be in Seattle Grace, working in trauma right now. Your long-term boyfriend, Mark Sloan, also works there and that was how you met him. He used to be known as a man-white but that was ages ago. Ever since he met you he has changed his ways.

A beep from your phone distracted you from cooking the pasta as you read the news headline: ‘Plane crash in Seattle, 13 injured and 30 dead.’ That didn’t sound good. Mark would be late from work. As you focused on reading the article, you hadn’t noticed your arm getting closer to the boiling metal pan. “Shit!”, you yelled in shock. Once you had realised your hand was burning, you quickly put your hand under some cool water. You sighed as you looked at it. It appeared to be a second degree burn so you knew you’d probably have to get it checked out.

You called one of your friends who you knew would be free right now to take you to the hospital as you couldn’t really drive right now. As she dropped you off, you thanked her and hurried in before the victims of the crash arrived. You went up to the reception and asked if they knew where Mark Sloan was. They gave you directions and you offered them your gratitude as you followed their instructions. After three minutes you saw Mark at a water fountain. “Mark!”, you muttered loudly. He turned around after hearing your voice. “What are you doing here, baby?”, he asked concerned.

You showed him your hand. “Oh shit. Baby, why didn’t you call me?”, he questioned. “I didn’t want to interrupt as I thought you’d be busy getting ready for the crash victims.”, you explained. His eyes softened. “You know that I’d help you over them any day.”, he reasoned. “Anyway, let me fix your hand for you before it gets busy.”, he gently guided you into a bay.

As he started working on your hand, he asked: “How’s the baby, is she energetic today?”

“No, but she was very hungry for spaghetti which is how I ended up with this burn in the first place.”, you answered quietly. “You got this burn from cooking? I mean, I knew you were clumsy but…”, he chuckled as you rolled your eyes at his teasing. “Well, I was shocked when I read about the plane crash, okay?”, you said defensively. “Fair enough. It’s a bad crash, I can’t believe there are more deaths than survivors. I mean, the injured ones could still die. For all we know they could be seriously injured or just a few cuts and bruises.”

“Yeah… well, I hope it’s only a few cuts.”, you stated. You watched as he gently cleaned your burn with sanitised equipment. His hands were so good at everything. It was hot. He seemed to have caught you staring. “What are you looking at?”, he asked you playfully. He knew what you were looking at. You stared up at him and he gazed down at you. He passionately kissed you before his pager went off. “Your hand is all done, I’ve cleaned it and bandaged it up but be careful with it. I have to sort out these crash victims. I’ll see you later at home, baby.”, he hastily replied as he placed a chaste peck on your forehead.

#mark sloan #mark sloan x reader #mcsteamy #greys anatomy #greys anatomy x reader #greys anatomy imagine #greys abc #fem!reader

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taexbankai · 2 months

Text

I only want you

this is chapter 9, the other chapters are on my page!

if you’re randomly stumbling upon this chapter, you might want to start the story from the beginning so you know all of the warnings and what’s going on lol. anyways, please excuse any spelling/grammar mistakes, i’ve been working like crazy recently and didn’t have a lot of time to reread. this chapter is kinda long lol

enjoy!

————-

it’s been a little over a month since satoru and i had sex. he took me out on a cute date the next day and i stayed at his house for another week before suguru took me back home. satoru sends me texts everyday and we facetime every night before we go to sleep. i miss him so much, not a second goes by when he doesn’t cross my mind.

“we should totally take a trip somewhere” nobara said as she sat down next to me. miwa wanted to try this new cafe that just opened, so she invited me, mai, momo, and nobara to come with her.

“where should we go?” mai asked her as she picked up her coffee

“i really want to go somewhere with a beach” nobara said, pulling out her phone to google places we could go

“there’s a beach about 30 minutes away from suguru’s school” i told her. she turned to me, a big smile on her face

“really?! we should go!” she said excitedly

“yeah, we should invite some people too” momo added

“that do sound like fun.. i’m down” miwa said

“okay great… should we get a hotel or an airbnb?” nobara asked everyone as she picked up her phone again

“we can stay at the hotel by the beach, my dad owns that one” i told her, pulling out my phone as well to look up everything that surrounds the beach

“oh yeah i forgot your dad owns hotels” mai said while laughing

“um… excuse me?” the girls and i turned our heads towards the person talking and we saw a guy who looked to be our age standing at the end of our table

“yes?” momo asked him

“i was wondering if i could get your number?” he asked as he turned his attention to me

“me?” i asked, pointing at myself to make sure he was speaking to me. he nodded his head as he began to get his phone out of his pocket

“oh.. i have a boyfriend” i told him. his smile slightly faded

“oh okay, so sorry to have bothered you!” he said as he turned around and left. i picked my phone back up and continued my search, trying to ignore the stares i was getting from my friends

“oh.. i have a boyfriend” maki mocked me, making her voice really high pitched

“i do not sound like that” i said and laughed

“so you’re dating gojo now and you didn’t tell me?” nobara asked. i sighed and put my phone down

“we’re not dating” i told them. they all did a loud dramatic gasp which made a few of the other people inside of the cafe turn and look at us

“could you guys NOT be embarrassing please? thank you” i said

“what do you mean you’re not dating him?!” nobara yelled, not caring if people looked at us

“i thought you said he took your virginity? wouldn’t he have asked you out after?” maki asked

“why did you tell that guy you had a boyfriend if you’re not dating anyone?” miwa asked

“why aren’t you two dating yet? you talk like everyday” momo added

“one at a time please, goodness” i said as i covered my face with my hands

“nobara… he hasn’t asked me out and idk if he will. i wasn’t expecting him to ask me out or anything after we had sex maki… even though i wish he did. now for your question miwa, i consider satoru as my boyfriend still. i don’t want to talk to any other guys… i don’t even have any interest in anyone other than satoru. lastly, yes momo we do talk everyday but i’m waiting for him to ask me out” i said, answering all of their questions

“i wonder why he hasn’t asked you out yet” nobara said

“maybe he’s scared?” mai asked nobara

“no, that can’t be it… scared isn’t even a word in gojo’s vocabulary” nobara said as she rubbed her hand over her chin, deep in thought

“maybe i should ask him out?” i asked them

“girl are you fucking kidding me?” nobara asked as she angrily slammed her hand down on the table

“no y/n, he needs to ask you out” mai said. i looked at momo and miwa and they were nodding their heads in agreement

“but why?” i asked

“would you get down on one knee and propose to a man?” nobara asked. i quickly shook my head no

“exactly” she said

“maybe he’s just waiting for the right chance to do it” miwa said. we all turned to look at her

“you’re actually probably right. he definitely gotta play it careful with y/n since he’s best friends with her brother” nobara said

“ooh i know, how about we invite satoru and suguru with us to the beach? it’s already on their side of town anyways” momo said

“that’s a good idea… have them invite some of their friends too” miwa excitedly said

“okay i’ll text suguru right now and ask if he would be down to come” i said as i went to suguru’s contact and began typing the message

“wait, when are we planning to do this?” i asked

“lets do it this weekend. we can leave on thursday and stay until like monday” nobara said. everyone all agreed to the time frame and i continued texting suguru.

“let’s make a group chat with everyone that’s going” mai said

“great idea” nobara said

—————————

“yeah, suguru told me about it earlier” satoru said on facetime

“so… do you want to come?” i asked nervously, scared that he wouldn’t want to come

“of course princess” he said, a smile making it’s way onto his face. i smiled, excited that he’s coming with us

“you look nice. who’s party are you going to again?” i asked him

“thank you baby.. and it’s haibara’s birthday party. it’s a surprise party though so we’re having it at suguru’s house” satoru said as he propped his phone up against something in his bathroom so i could watch him as he finished fixing his hair. he had on a white, long sleeved button up shirt and black pants

“you’re not wearing your glasses?” i asked him

“nah, i was going to but i’m going to be drinking tonight. i don’t want to accidentally break them like i did last time i got drunk” he said while laughing

“oh okay” i replied, smiling at him

“why?” he asked, taking one last look at himself in the mirror before he picked up his phone and looked at me

“just don’t want all the girls there looking at your pretty blue eyes. they’re so bright and pretty, it catches all the girl’s attention. not to mention that you’re going to be drinking too, so it’ll be easier for them to talk to you” i said, slightly going on a mini rant

“y/n-”

“and you’re really tall, your voice is nice and you have a nice body. your face is attractive and you have a super fun and easy going personality. it’s so easy to fall in love with you, the girls are going to be all over you, and i-“

“y/n” satoru said more sternly this time. i immediately stopped talking, realizing just how much i was ranting

“don’t be worried. i won’t do anything with anyone even if i’m drunk” he said while laughing

“i’m not worried!” i said, feeling embarrassed. satoru continued laughing at me as he exited his bathroom and walked into his room to grab something before he started walking downstairs

“is… is riko going to be there?” i asked, anxiously chewing on my bottom lip

“yeah” satoru said. it felt like my heart had fell into my stomach

“don’t worry y/n, i haven’t spoken to her since that night. i won’t do anything with her” he said

“last time you were drunk you slept with her though” i said quietly. satoru was silent for a little bit before he let out a sigh

“you’re right, but it’s different this time y/n. i don’t even feel the urge to sleep with anyone else anymore after being with you” he said seriously. i was happy at his words but i still couldn’t help the nervous feeling crawling up my spine

“okay, don’t let me ruin your night. go have fun. tell haibara i said happy birthday!” i said, trying to change the topic

“i’ll tell him. are you about to go to sleep?” satoru asked as he left out of his front door, making sure to lock it before he walked over to suguru’s condo, opening the door

“yeah, i don’t have anything else to do” i said

“you can text me if you get too lonely” he said

“is that y/n?” i heard suguru ask. he walked over to satoru and took the phone out of his hand

“wow, you talk to him more than you talk to me now” suguru said

“love youuuuu” i said, laughing at suguru’s “hurt” expression

“yeah yeah, love you too” he said as he playfully rolled his eyes

“oh yeah, my friends all said they’re down about going to the beach. i’ll text you tomorrow and give you all the details” he said

“okay sounds good…now put toru back on the phone” i told him

“ouch” he said, we both laughed as he handed satoru back his phone

“have fun, drink responsibly okay? i don’t care if you only live next door” i said

“okay princess” satoru said while laughing

“goodnight toru”

“goodnight babygirl” i hung up the phone and stared up at my ceiling. ‘what if riko makes a move on him?’ ‘what if she follows him into his house after and they end up having sex?’ ‘what if he ends up realizing he actually still loves her and he wants to get back with her?’ i asked myself, my mind racing and thinking of 100 different possible outcomes

“stop it y/n… he said nothing will happen, relax” i told myself as i took a deep breathe in and out. i was still too anxious to sleep so i decided to just scroll on instagram for a few hours until i got bored. after about 2 hours i decided to text satoru to see how to party was going

me: hey toru, how’s the party going?

toru<3: hey baby, i thought you were going to sleep?

toru <3: it’s really fun though, i’ve had about 3 shots, i’m pretty drunk right now

me: damn 3 shots? you’re usually pretty fucked up after 1 lol, and i couldn’t fall asleep.

toru<3: haibara said i have to get fucked up with them tonight, so i’m going all out

me: what liquor are you drinking?

i waited and waited but after an hour of satoru not responding, i figured he was having fun and was too drunk to respond, so i decided to actually go to sleep. i texted him ‘goodnight <3’ and put my phone on the charger, closing my eyes and finally going to sleep

———satoru’s pov————

“just one more shot gojo come on” mei mei said as he passed a shot towards me

“no i’ve had enough” i said, pushing the drink away from me. haibara was extremely drunk, he could barely stand up. he was sitting on the couch with shoko on his lap

“are they ever gonna date? or just keep hooking up for forever?” yuki asked as she walked over to where i was sitting with suguru

“they do fuck a lot, might as well just date at this point” suguru said. i closed my eyes and laid my head back against the couch

“my head is spinning” i said to no one in particular

“how many shots did you take man?” suguru asked me

“i lost count after the 4th one” i told him. he started laughing at me

“you really can’t handle your liquor” he said

“most normal people start to get pretty fucked up after 3 shots suguru” i said, opening my eyes and looking at him

“here, i got you some water” suguru and i both turned to my right and saw riko sit down next to me while holding a water bottle

“thanks” i said as i grabbed the water, opening it and drinking it

“have you been drinking?” yuki asked her

“i only had 2 shots” riko said to her

“so… how are you and y/n doing?” riko turned and asked me. suguru looked at me, also waiting for my response

“why?” i asked her, turning my attention to her

“just wondering… she’s a nice girl. i never got to apologize to her for making a move on you that night” she said. i didn’t respond, i closed my eyes and drunk some more water, trying to sober up a little

“did you have sex with her?” riko asked me

“riko, why are you so curious about what he’s doing with my sister?” suguru asked, making me open my eyes at his sudden outburst

“i can’t ask a simple question?” riko asked him, getting defensive

“it doesn’t concern you, you’re the one who cheated on him… remember that?” suguru sarcastically asked her, she didn’t say anything

“oh, don’t tell me you forgot about toji. the married man you decided to sleep with multiple times. how could you forget someone so important?” suguru said

“stop it” riko quietly said

“stop it? you want me to stop talking about it? why? is it because you’re ashamed of yourself for cheating on my best friend? or is it because you don’t want everyone knowing just how dirty you are?” suguru added. i sat up and grabbed his shoulder

“suguru” i said, knowing that the alcohol was making him more upset than he needed to be

“it’s alright” i told him

“babe let’s go get some fresh air okay?” yuki said to him

“my bad satoru” suguru said as he stood up with yuki

“don’t worry about it” i said to him. after he walked away with yuki i turned to look at riko and saw that she was crying. i stood up, almost falling over but catching myself at the last second. i walked over to haibara and shoko

“could y’all stop making out for a second? thanks” i said, laughing at them

“what do you want asshole?” shoko said, her eyes low and red, haibara could barely even open his eyes

“go to suguru’s guest room upstairs. you’re both in no condition to go home anyways” i told them before i started making my own way upstairs, i went to suguru’s room and walked in, falling onto his bed

“just need 5 quick minutes of sleep” i said to myself as i closed my eyes

“satoru” a quiet voice said to me. i quickly opened my eyes and saw riko standing in front of me

“what do you want?” i asked annoyed, sitting up and looking at her

“did you sleep with her?” she asked me. i let out an angry groan while running my fingers through my hair

“could you just answer the question please, i wa-“

“YES I FUCKED HER!!” i yelled at her, my frustration reaching it’s max. she flinched at me raising my voice

“so… are we really done?” she asked as she took a step closer to me

“ i’m too drunk for this bullshit right now riko. get out” i said

“you didn’t say no though” she said as she started to take her jacket off

“yes we’re done. we’ve been fucking done. i originally thought that we could maybe stay friends but you’ve proven to me that clearly that can’t happen” i said to her. she didn’t reply but instead started to pull her dress up

“what the fuck are you doing?” i asked as i stood up

“you can’t just forget about everything we had satoru” she said as she tried to pull her dress over her head. i quickly walked over to her and pulled it back down, glancing at suguru’s bedroom door that was wide open still

“riko you’re drunk, stop it. you’re embarrassing yourself right now” i told her

“satoru please” she said, tears falling from her eyes. i sighed and walked over to suguru’s door to leave

“do you love her?” riko asked me as she wrapped her arms around my waist, stopping me from leaving the room

“let go of me” i said to her

“do you love her satoru?” she asked me again

“yes i do” i answered as i snatched her hands off of me

“so leave me the fuck alone riko” i said as i turned and looked at her before turning back around and walking to the stairs. haibara and shoko were walking up the stairs while holding hands, suguru and yuki following behind them

“hey we were looking for you. we had to walk these two up here to make sure they didn’t fall down on their way to the guest room” yuki said to me while laughing

“i went to suguru’s room to try and rest but riko followed me in there” i told her

“what’s up with that chick? she’s like obsessed with you” suguru said as he walked up to me as the 4 of them all made it to the top of the stairs. i was about to respond to him but i was distracted by feeling something hit my back

“you’re so cruel satoru!” riko yelled as she picked up one of suguru’s mini hallway decorations and threw it at me.

“are you fucking crazy?!” shoko shouted at riko

“what’s your problem?!” yuki yelled, also mad. i turned around and saw riko begin to pick up a book this time to throw at me. yuki immediately rushed over to her and slapped her across her face

“i want you out, NOW!” yuki yelled at her

“b-but yuki i-“

“OUT NOW!” yuki yelled again, not letting riko talk. suguru, haibara and i stood there in shock as yuki and shoko forced riko down the stairs

“shoko, you go with haibara to the guest room, it’s still his birthday, he’s suppose to be enjoying his night. i’m going to wait with riko outside until her uber get’s here” yuki said. i picked up the item that riko threw at me and went back into suguru’s room, falling back on his bed and tossing the item somewhere on his floor

“i’m way too drunk for all of this” i said to myself as i kept my face buried in the covers

“since you’re drunk, i’ll let you slide just this once for throwing my shit around” suguru said as he picked up the item i threw on the floor and put it back where it was supposed to go. he then came back into the room and closed the door. i closed my eyes and tried to go to sleep

“oh shit!” i yelled, sitting up and searching for my phone in my pockets

“what?” suguru asked as he sat down on his bed

“i forgot to text y/n back” i said. i pulled my phone out of my pocket and turned it on to text her back, seeing i had 2 messages from her. i started to type out a response but my phone died in the middle of my message

“fuck! my phone died” i said out loud, angry with myself for forgetting to respond

“relax satoru give it to me, i’ll put it on my charger” suguru said as he held his hand out, waiting for me to pass him my phone. i passed it to him and laid back on his bed as he put it on the charger

“she said goodnight because i wasn’t responding.. she’s probably mad at me now” i said as i covered my face with both of my hands

“or she’s just tired” suguru said while laughing

“where’s your phone? let me call her really quick” i said as i looked at him

“no, let her sleep satoru, you can talk to her in the morning” he said

“and don’t fall asleep in here. yuki’s sleeping over tonight, it’s been a while since we’ve been alone so i got some pent up stress” he added

“i’m not gonna fall asleep in here, and please, spare me the details of your sex life with yuki” i told him while laughing

“you didn’t spare me when i had to hear you having sex with my little sister” he said

“you can never leave me y/n, you’re mine” suguru said, repeating my words from that night to tease me

“it’s true, she’s mine” i told him

“what do you mean by that?” he asked me

“i won’t let anyone else have her” i said as i sat up, now making eye contact with him

“so what… you love her? or are you just sleeping with her and texting her because you’re bored?” he asked me, his face extremely serious as he waited for my answer

“of course i love her suguru. i love her so much, i can’t stop thinking about her. i would never use her for her body” i told him honestly. he didn’t say anything

“suguru i promise i’ll take care of her, i won’t ever hurt her” i said

“i’ll protect her and love her until she gets sick of me. even when she gets sick of me, i still won’t let her leave me” i added

“well if she’s sick of you, then you need to leave her alone, you stalker” suguru said, a small smile on his face. i laughed at his response

“so are you two dating?” he asked me

“nah, i didn’t want to ask her out without talking to you first, since i already slept with her behind your back.. well before you caught us” i truthfully told him

“i trust you satoru. i trust you more than anyone else in this entire world. i just didn’t want you dating y/n because i knew that if something happened between the two of you, things would never be the same between the 3 of us again. plus she’s my sister… most guys wouldn’t want their best friend banging their little sister…. with that being said, i know that you will take good care of her and protect her. you’ll be there for her whenever i can’t, and i trust you with her” he told me

“so, are you saying it’s okay for me to ask her to be my girlfriend?” i asked him, a smile making it’s way onto my face

“yes…but satoru if you hurt her or make her cry i swear to god-“

“i won’t, i promise!” i said excitedly. suguru laughed at my excitement

“even if i didn’t want you two to date, there’s no way i could keep you two apart. plus she’s head over heels in love with you, there’s no talking her out of loving you….even though choso came close to claiming her” suguru said, the smile on my face instantly disappearing

“don’t remind me” i said. suguru let out a loud laugh as he held his stomach from laughing so hard

“honestly, that day changed me forever. i think seeing her in bed with choso made me realize that you’re definitely the better choice” suguru said once he finally stopped laughing

“it took THAT to make you realize?” i asked him, annoyed

“unfortunately yes”

——— back to y/n’s pov———

“i added suguru, satoru, nanami, haibara, shoko, yuki, mei mei, utahime, and choso to the group chat” i told nobara as i sat down next to her on the couch

“okay great, so that makes me, you, mai, momo, miwa, ino, inumaki, yuji, megumi, kokichi, suguru, gojo, nanami, haibara, shoko, yuki, mei mei, utahime, and choso…. so 19 people total right?” nobara asked me as she looked over all of the contacts in the group chat

“yeah, sounds right to me. i don’t think we forgot anybody” i said

“okay let me send a text to the group chat then” she said

Vacation group chat:

nobara: hello everyone! for all of the people who don’t have my number saved, i’m nobara. i was just sending a quick text to let everyone know that we’re planning on leaving thursday afternoon, around 2pm. we’re meeting up at y/n’s house and then we’ll leave from her house and go straight to the hotel

yuji: how many cars are we taking?

mai: we only need like 2 cars tbh

me: i’ll take my car

ino: i’ll bring mine also

suguru: so ya’ll don’t need me to drive out there and pick anyone up?

me: no it’s okay!

megumi: i call dibs on riding with y/n. ino and nobara are gonna drive me crazy with the couple shit

yuji: me too!

choso: damn lil bro.. you still single?

yuji: shut up choso

nobara: first of all, we’re not annoying

me: okay so i got megumi and yuji, anyone else?

momo: mai and i will come with you

me: okay so then in ino’s car it’ll be nobara, ino, miwa and kokichi?

miwa: yeah sounds good to me

satoru <3: y/n why don’t you just stay at my house?

me: the hotel has an indoor pool and spa that’s why toru lol

yuji: and a buffet!

suguru: it’s my dad’s hotel satoru

satoru <3: ohhhh okay i see. i’ll stay there too then

yuki: that’s a good idea, we should all stay there together

utahime: i’m down with that

meimei: so how do you want to do the rooms?

shoko: 2 to a room? or 4 to a room?

haibara: lets do 2

nanami: of course he wants 2…

suguru: alright alright, we can do 2 and 4, who want’s a room with 2 beds?

choso: i don’t need 2 beds, i’ll share a bed with y/n, right y/n? ;)

yuji: ok… what the actual fuck are you talking about right now choso

satoru <3: he obviously wants to die

me: this is getting no where lmao

yuki: lets do this. suguru and i will share a room, y/n and satoru will share a room, haibara and shoko, nobara and ino, and miwa and kokichi. mei mei, choso, utahime and nanami can have their own rooms. momo, mai, yuji, megumi and inumaki can decide if they want to share rooms or have their own room

megumi: wait, so when you say 2 to a room or 4 to a room, do you mean a single bed and 2 people? or 2 separate beds with one person each? orrrr do you mean 2 separate beds with 2 people in each bed??

kokichi: that question literally just made my head hurt

ino: same

satoru <3: 2 people in one bed, and for 4 people to a room it’ll be 2 people in each bed. but if you want 2 to a room but 2 separate beds, that’s fine too

me: the beds in the rooms we’re getting are all king sized. dad already said he has things ready, he just wants to know how many rooms we’ll be needing

momo: i’ll share a room with maki

megumi: i want my own room

inumaki: me too

yuji: but i wanted to share a room with you guys :(

inumaki: oops

yuji: fine i’ll have my own room

me: okay so that’s like 13 different rooms right?

satoru <3: yeah that’s 13 rooms princess

suguru: please stop, i’m literally about to throw up

yuki: shut up suguru lmao. okay then it’s settled, see you guys on thursday!

nobara: i’m so excited!

“okay girl. i’m gonna go home and start packing my stuff” i told nobara as i stood up and grabbed my purse

“already? it’s only tuesday” she said

“i like to be prepared. i want to just get it out of the way” i said, a smile coming to my face

“don’t forget to pack the new swimsuits we bought. i want to match with you and the girls” she said as she walked me out to my car

“i will, don’t worry. bye” i said as i gave her a hug

“bye, love you. text me when you get home”

“love you too, and i will”

——— trip day———

“should we stop for snacks first?” yuji asked me while putting his suitcase in the trunk of my car

“it’s only like an hour away” i told him

“ 2 hours actually” he said matter of factly

“if you really think you’re going to starve to death in that little bit of time, then yes we can stop for snacks” i said, laughing at yuji

“yay thank you y/n you’re the best” he said happily as he gave me a hug

“okay we’re all loaded and ready. what about you guys?” nobara asked me as she walked over to my car

“i’m all done. megumi, momo and mai are already in the car. we’re gonna stop at a store really quick to grab some snacks first through” i told her as i closed my trunk

“okay we’ll follow you there and grab a few things as well” ino said

“okay cool”

“wow this is a nice hotel!” mai said as she looked at the building

“i’ve never been to this hotel before so this is my first time here too” i told her as i started taking all of our bags out of the trunk

“satoru said that they’re parking already” i told everyone. they said okay and continued grabbing their belongings

“hi everyone!” we all turned around and saw yuki running towards us with a big smile on her face. she gave me a big hug before she turned to my friends

“nice to meet all of you! i’m yuki” she said to everyone except nobara, megumi and yuji, as they already know her

“nice to meet you!” they all said. a couple of seconds later, suguru came up to us with satoru and everyone else following behind him

“your bag is extremely heavy babe, what did you even pack in here?” suguru said to yuki as he carried both of their luggage

“all of my essentials” she said, giggling

“hey babygirl” satoru said as he came up to me. i immediately gave him a hug

“hi toru, i missed you so much” i said. he laughed and kissed me on the top of my head

“i missed you more”

“okay so lets introduce everyone” utahime said. i let go of satoru and faced everyone again

“you’ve all already met satoru, shoko and suguru. this is yuki, she’s suguru’s girlfriend. and then we have mei mei, utahime, nanami, choso and haibara” i said, introducing suguru’s friends to mine

“this is nobara, megumi, yuji, momo, mai, ino, miwa, kokichi, and inumaki” i said, making sure to introduce everyone to everybody

“yuji? so you’re choso’s little brother?” haibara asked yuji

“yeah, i know we don’t look alike” yuji said jokingly

“hey shoko!” i said to shoko as i gave her a hug

“okay let’s get inside! i’m excited to see the rooms” nobara said excitedly

“right! lets go” i said, agreeing with her. i turned around to pick up my luggage but saw that satoru was already holding it and standing by suguru talking about something. i turned back to nobara and saw that she also didn’t have her luggage as ino was holding it for her. we locked arms with each other and started walking towards the hotel. once we were inside of the hotel, we checked in and got our key cards

“i��ve never stayed in a suite room before” inumaki said as we got into the elevator

“really?” i asked him, shocked

“really. i’ve never really felt like spending the extra money for it” he said as he shrugged his shoulders

“understandable. but now you’re on vacation so enjoy the room!” i told him as i smiled. once we reached our floor we waited in the hallway for satoru and the others to come up, as all 19 of us couldn’t fit in the elevator with all of our bags and suitcases. once everyone was in the hallway, we began to look for our rooms

“our room number is 444” i told satoru as he walked behind me. he nodded his head okay and continued to follow me to the room

“wait.. are we going the right way?” i asked him as i stopped walking and looked at the key card again before looking at the doors next to where we were standing. satoru continued walking straight

“yes it’s this way” he said

“wait how do you know? have you been here before?” i asked him as i ran to catch up with him. he was silent for a few seconds before he spoke

“no. i’m looking at the room numbers” he said. i decided to stop asking questions and to follow him. once we made it down the end of the hallway we turned to the right and walked a few steps down the connecting hallway

“oh it’s right here toru!” i told him excitedly. he laughed at my reaction

“open the door then baby”

i quickly put the key card against the door scanner and waited until the door unlocked. once it was open i pushed the door open and walked in before stopping in my tracks

“toru… omg… i think they gave us the wrong room” i said, panicking

“why do you think that?” he asked. i pointed down at the floor

“look!” i said to him. on the floor was rose petals leading further into the room and there were candles lit following the roses

“it’s probably a marriage proposal toru” i said

“well let’s walk in first to make sure” he said as he lightly pushed me fully into the dark, candle lit room. i nodded my head okay and took a step before stopping again. satoru closed the door and put our suitcases down on the floor

“i want to record this to show the girls. i can’t believe they gave us the wrong room” i told satoru as i took out my phone, turning on the flash and starting to record. satoru only laughed at me, deciding to stay quiet

“i won’t touch anything, i just want to take a quick peak.. say hi to the camera toru” i said to him as i turned the camera around to show him

“hiii… actually i want to record too” he said as he took out his phone. he turned on his phone and pointed at me

“here we have y/n who’s recording someone else’s marriage proposal… say hi baby” satoru said while laughing

“hey y’all ” i said, laughing with him

“okay, start walking so we can see the room” satoru said. i turned back around and started following the rose petals, making sure to record everything

“this is so beautiful. i feel bad for looking” i said to satoru who just laughed. i continued to follow the roses into the huge suite. the roses led me to the huge king sized bed. there was roses on the bed and at least 20 heart shaped balloons floating around the bed. on the wall behind the bed there were balloons that read out the words ‘will you be my girlfriend?’. i walked up to the bed and looked closer. on the bed there were a bunch of different pictures of satoru and i from over the years, some of when we were still kids and even new ones from my graduation and me sleeping after he slept in my bed. there was a giant teddy bear that had my name stitched on it and a huge box of chocolate covered strawberries. tears were falling down my face as i looked at everything

“t-toru” i stuttered, trying to speak through my crying. satoru smiled at me as he put his phone down. he walked up to me and wrapped his arms around my waist

“i’ve never met someone like you in my entire life y/n. you’ve been there since the beginning. we’ve watched each other grow up, helped each other grow up. you mean so much to me y/n, i can’t live without you.. i tried and i almost lost my mind in the process. i love you so much… i’ve been in love with you for so long now, but i’ve been trying to swallow those feelings, i can’t keep them away anymore. i promise to love and cherish you forever and ever y/n, protect you and bring you nothing but happiness. you’re the girl i want to spend the rest of my life with, start a family with, and grow old and die with. would you please do me the honor of allowing me to be your boyfriend?” satoru said. i stared at his beautiful blue eyes, my mouth slightly open in disbelief. i feel like i’ve waited my entire life for this moment right here, i felt like i was dreaming

“yes satoru, of course i’ll be your girlfriend!” i said excitedly. he smiled at me before kissing me and spinning me around in a circle

“she said yes!” he yelled and started laughing. i opened my mouth to say something but didn’t get the chance to speak because our room door opened and all of our friends came rushing in cheering, even my parents came in

“what the… what’s going on?” i asked, laughing at them, still trying to wipe some of my tears off of my face

“congratulations y/n! i’m so happy for you!” shoko yelled as she hugged me

“wait.. so all of you guys knew? even mom and dad?” i asked, shocked. everyone laughed at me

“not everyone, satoru called me after you first told him about the trip. he wanted this room in particular because it was the biggest and has a nice view, and then he proceeded to talk about setting up a surprise proposal” my dad said

“and so i got involved! satoru and i started planning everything. i found every picture i’ve ever taken of you both and sent them all to him and made sure to keep you distracted enough so you wouldn’t suspect anything” my mom told me

“and then suguru, shoko, satoru and i all came here last night and prepared the room for you!”” yuki said to me as she ran up and gave me a hug

“satoru came back like an hour ago though to light all of the candles and to make sure everything looked perfect” suguru said, a smile on his face

“suguru just now told the rest of us like 10 minutes ago once we started walking towards our rooms” nobara said. my eyes started to water again

“you.. i… all of this for me?” i asked, turning to satoru again

“of course! you deserve the world y/n” he said as he kissed me on my forehead

“you’re going to have to go all out for your wedding proposal now after this” shoko said which made everyone start to laugh

“thank you all so much. i love all of you!” i said happily

“ i’m so happy for you little sis, you deserve it” suguru said as he walked over to me and gave me a hug. i hugged him back tightly. while we were hugging, a bright flash lit up the room. we turned around and saw our mom taking a picture of us

“aww look at our babies honey” my mom said to my dad, holding back tears herself

“well… while we have everybody here and happy… i have an announcement to make” yuki said. everyone turned to look at her as she walked over to suguru and grabbed his hand. they looked at all of us before suguru pulled a small photo out of his wallet and held it up for everyone to see

“i’m pregnant!” yuki said excitedly. nobara and i screamed at the top of our lungs as my mom started crying tears of joy

“OMG OMG REALLY?”

“CONGRATULATIONS!”

“I’M GOING TO BE AN AUNTIE!”

“I’M GOING TO BE A GRANDMA!”

“I’M GOING TO BE A GRANDAD!”

“I’M GOING TO BE A GOD DAD!”

“i’m the god mother of course” we all stopped yelling in excitement and laughed at shoko’s comment, as she was the only one who didn’t scream

“i never said you were the god dad satoru” suguru said to satoru while laughing

“bro, you told me before you told anyone else… i’m definitely the god dad” satoru replied

“wait you told him before me?” i asked suguru

“i was shocked and scared, i needed to talk to a guy” suguru said, still laughing

“and you!” i said, turning around to face yuki

“why didn’t you tell me?” i asked her

“i wanted to surprise you. shoko only knew because she was in the bathroom with me when i took the test” yuki said. i smiled and ran over to hug her

“i’m so happy for you yuki.. really” i said to her as she hugged me back. we all stayed in my hotel room for a little while longer before everyone decided to start heading out

“let’s all meet at the buffet around 6 for dinner… until then, everyone can do whatever” nobara said. everyone agreed and started leaving to their rooms

“okay honey, we’re going back home… enjoy your vacation” my mom said as she gave me and satoru a hug, my dad hugging us right after

“we will, thank you both again for everything. i love you” i said to them before they left. i turned back to satoru and jumped on him, giving him a passionate kiss

“i love you so much satoru gojo” he wrapped his arms around me and started giving me little kisses all around my face

“i love you more princess” he let go of my waist and walked over to the balcony window and opened the curtains

“now we can get some natural light in here, and you can look at the gifts i got you” he said as he walked over to the bed and sat down

“wait, stay right there, i want to take a picture of everything first” i told him as i took my phone out. i backed up as far as i needed to and took 3 different pictures just in case

“okay, your turn. go sit” satoru said as he stood up. i ran over to the bed and sat down. i grabbed the giant teddy bear and hugged it while i looked at satoru’s camera and posed. he kept snapping a bunch of photo’s

“okay toru that’s enough” i said giggling and covering my face

“you just look so good, i can’t help myself” he said, smiling as me as he sat down on the bed with me. i picked up one of the chocolate covered strawberries and fed one to satoru before eating one myself

“these taste really good, thank you so much toru” i said, grabbing another one. satoru just smiled at me, lifting his phone up and taking another picture of me

“stop it!” i said, laughing while trying to grab his phone

“okay okay that was the last one i promise!” he said as he put his phone on the dresser. i picked up the box of strawberries and placed them on the table we had in the room. i then walked back over to the bed and picked up the teddy bear and all of the pictures of satoru and i that was on the bed and placed it on the chair by the table

“you’re getting ready to take a nap or something?” satoru asked me. i didn’t respond to him, i sat down on the bed and looked at him, my eyes slowly trailing down his body before back at his eyes

“take your pants off” i told him. he looked at me, his face in complete shock before he erupted in a fit of laughter

“you’re so cute when you’re trying to be dominant” he said, still laughing

“just take them off” i whined, pulling on the strings of his grey sweats

“if you want them off, then take them off yourself” satoru suddenly said. i looked at him and saw that his once funny mood was gone and replaced by lust. he stared at me, waiting for my next move. i reached for the waistband of his sweats and pulled them down. satoru slightly lifted himself off of the bed so i could pull them down. once i had his sweats off and on the floor i looked at his underwear, his bulge becoming harder by the second

“i’ll let you be in control just this once babygirl” satoru said, a small smile on his face. i started to slowly massage his dick through his underwear. satoru let out a low moan and i turned my attention back on him. he had his eyes closed, his right hand running up and down my thigh in an encouraging way. i stopped my movements and stood up, quickly taking off my clothes. satoru sat up and watched me take my clothes off as he started touching himself

“take the rest of your clothes off” i told him. he listened this time, taking off his shirt and his underwear. i climbed on top of him and looked down at him

“you look so pretty right now y/n” he told me. i smiled and kissed him. he reached down and grabbed his dick, holding it tightly as he rubbed the tip against my pussy. the sudden contact made me moan

“fuck, you’re so wet” satoru groaned

“sit on my face” he said, letting go of his dick and placing his hands on my hips

“ i thought i was in control today?” i said playfully

“maybe next time princess” he said with a smirk

“sit on my face. now” he repeated. i hesitated, a bit nervous

“but i-“

“y/n” the tone of satoru’s voice made me realize he wasn’t about to listen to any excuses i was about to make. satoru moved down on the bed and i slowly crawled up until his head was in between my legs

“toru i’m nervous” i told him honestly

“nervous about what? i’m going to take good care of you don’t worry” he told me as he hooked each of his arms around my thighs so i couldn’t move

“but what if i lose my balance and fall, smothering you? you wouldn’t be able to brea-“ satoru ran his tongue in between my folds making my words get caught in my throat

“s-satoru!” i yelled out, one of my hands instinctively reaching for his hair while my other hand was pressed against the wall to hold myself up

“i got you baby, don’t worry” he said. he kissed my clit, his tongue coming out shortly after and circling it. after sucking on my clit for a little, he let go and ran this tongue up and down my pussy repeatedly

“satoru! satoru, i.. it feels….” i moaned, my words trailing off. he continued to eat me out. his tongue stopped at my hole and he looked up at me as he slowly pushed his tongue inside of me

“oh shitttt… fuck satoru” i closed my eyes tightly, satoru started tongue fucking me. i started to slightly lift myself up, grinding and moving against his tongue. i began to grind harder against him, letting go of the wall and putting both of my hands in his hair as i started grinding against his face, forgetting about trying not to smother him

“i’m about to cum toru!” i said. i opened my eyes and looked down at him to see him still looking at me. he didn’t say anything and instead allowed me to continue to ride his face. i came after a few more thrusts of his tongue. i tried to get off of satoru while i came but he held me down tightly and continued to push his tongue inside of me

“toru” i whined once it started to become too much for me. he finally let me go and i sat next to him on the bed and looked at him as i tried to catch my breathe

“that was fucking amazing. you looked so sexy” he told me as he smiled

“come here” i said, smiling back at him. satoru hovered on top of me and kissed me. i wrapped my legs around his waist and grabbed his dick, rubbing his tip against my clit. satoru moaned into our kiss. i lined him up with my entrance and tried to push him in but satoru broke the kiss and grabbed my hand

“what’s the matter?” i asked him

“i have to get the condom’s out of my suitcase first. i brought some just in case” he told me

“i don’t want to use any condoms” i said, speaking purely out of lust and desire

“y/n, that’s very irresponsible of you” satoru said, a small chuckle following after as he sat up

“seriously though, if you’re going to keep asking me to have sex with you without a condom then you have to be mentally prepared to become a mom y/n” he told me

“i am ready, i’ll have all of your kids toru” i said as i sat up next to him

“i’m serious y/n, you’re only 18… you haven’t even lived life yet. it would be different if you got pregnant on accident, but i would rather use protection than not use it for no reason” satoru said as he stood up and walked over to his suitcase. unzipping the front part and taking out a box of condoms. i looked down at the bed. he’s right, he’s absolutely right

“so… you don’t want to have a baby with me? that’s what you mean?” i asked him, my insecurities slowly coming back. i watched as satoru opened the condom and put it on himself

“y/n, that’s not what i’m saying. i’m just saying that there’s still many things i want to do with you and experience with you before we settle down and have a kid. because trust me… you’ll end up pregnant for sure. i was barely able to pull out the last time we had sex, it literally took everything in me to pull out of you” he said as he got back on top of me

“when i look at your face when i’m about to come, my mind goes ‘maybe one or two kids right now wouldn’t be so bad’ and i start to lose the strength to pull out” he added as he kissed my forehead. i smiled and pulled him down to kiss him on his lips

“are we good to continue?” he asked me

“yes toru please fuck me already” i said, laughing. he wasted no time, he slowly pushed his way into me. i held on to his arm, the feeling still hurting since we’ve only had sex once. once he was fully inside of me he didn’t give me a chance to get used to his size this time, he immediately pulled out before thrusting inside of me again

“toru!” i moaned out in pain and pleasure. his pace quickened. he wrapped his arms underneath my body and held onto me. i closed my eyes, my nails digging into satoru’s shoulders

“you feel even tighter than the last time” satoru said, he continued to thrust into me until he suddenly pulled out

“why’d you stop?” i asked him, now feeling empty without him inside of me

“turn around” he said. i shook my head no

“i want to be able to see your face while we fuck toru” i whined

“you’ll see my face still i promise… now turn around baby” satoru said, a smirk growing on his face. i gave in and turned around, getting on my hands and knees. satoru moved closer to me, his dick resting on the curve of my ass. he started gently rubbing on my ass, a low groan coming out of his mouth

“you look so sexy like this” he muttered. he straightened his posture and placed both of his hands on my back, gently pushing it down

“arch your back baby” he said, softly laughing at my inexperience

“stop, don’t laugh… I’m still learning” i said, also laughing

“it’s okay babygirl, i’ll teach you everything you need to know, no man other than me will ever see you like this anyway” he said as he lined his tip with my entrance, i spread my legs and tried to arch lower

“oh yeah? what if i want to experience having sex with another guy? i mean it’s only fair, you’ve had sex with other girls before” i said, trying to see what satoru would say. i waited for his response, but he stayed silent. my heart started to race, i was kidding, there’s no way he thinks i actually want to have sex with another guy. i opened my mouth to say something but right at that moment, satoru abruptly pushed himself into me. the force of his thrust jerked my entire body forward, if it wasn’t for the tight grip satoru had on my hips i would have lost my balance for sure

“w-wait satoru… fuck… it’s too much” i cried out. satoru was so deep that it brought tears to my eyes. he remained silent, speeding up his thrusts instead

“satoru! oh my gosh” i moaned , my eyes rolled to the back of my head. satoru let go of my hips and grabbed both of my arms. he pulled me up against his chest, holding both of my arms behind my back with one hand and his other hand wrapping around my neck

“take it back” he said in my ear, his hips continuing to snap against me. i slightly turned my head and looked at him

“w-what?” i asked, tears still running down my face and my mind slowly going blank from how deep he was in me

“you’re mine and only mine. only i can fuck you” he said, his eyes looking right into mine

“toru” i moaned, the whole situation turning me on even more. satoru let go of my arms and neck and placed his hands back on my hips as i fell forward, using my arms to support me. he started roughly thrusting into me

“shittt” he moaned out. his thrusts were too much for me to handle, i started slowly sliding down onto my stomach, each thrust pushing me down further and further until i was laying flat on my stomach, satoru didn’t stop his thrusts though

“s-satoru, i’m cu-“

“take it back” he said, his thrusts slowing down until he stopped moving

“i was just kidding satoru i swear”

“i don’t like when you play around like that” satoru said

“i only want to fuck you toru” i told him. he leaned down and buried his face in the side of my neck, his thrusts starting back up

“good, cause only i can fuck you like this” he said. he sat back up and picked his pace up, his hips now rolling into mine

“only i can make you feel like this, make you cry out in pleasure , make love to you” he continued, his hands pushing down against my hips. i kept my face against the pillows, screaming out at how deep he was in me

“and only you can make me feel like this” he said, his thrust starting to become slightly sloppy

“satoru!-“

“me too babygirl” he said. satoru thrusted into me a few more times before i came, a silent cry leaving my body as i tightly gripped onto the bed sheets

“fuck fuck fuckkkk” satoru moaned out as he came, his head thrown back and his dick still sliding in and out of me. once satoru came back down from his high, he carefully slid out of me and took off the condom, getting up and throwing it in the trash. i kept my face in the pillows, breathing heavily and trying to catch my breathe

“hey, are you okay?” satoru asked me as he laid down next to me, moving the pillows so he could see my face

“yeah i’m fine, that was just an intense orgasm” i told him, a smile making it’s way to my face. satoru pulled me closer to him and wrapped his arms around my body as he pulled the blankets over our bodies

“i love you so much y/n” he told me. i looked up at him and saw that he was already looking down at me

“my heart was beating so fast when i was asking you to be my girlfriend. i was so nervous” he said, a cute smile on his face

“i love you more satoru, thank you for making me your girlfriend, this is the best day of my life” i said. he smiled at me and gave me a kiss

we both fell asleep shortly after

—————————

hello readers! i decided to give y’all one last smut before i ended the story. i’m thinking about doing one last final chapter, like a chapter based on a huge time skip before i completely end this story. anyways, i hope you all enjoyed this chapter.. thanks for reading, byeeee!

#gojo x reader #gojo x y/n #gojou satoru x reader #jjk smut #jjk suguru #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk x y/n #jujutsu gojo #smut #satoru x you #satoru x reader #jjk satoru #gojo smut #satoru smut #jujustu kaisen #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu sorcerer #y/n

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brighttears · 1 year

Text

Let Go

Joel Miller x reader

No physical description, gender neutral, no use of y/n

Summary: When Joel starts to doubt your journey to find his brother, all of his fear and grief crashes down on him, and he finally accepts you as a safe harbor.

Word count: 2.8k

Warnings: Angst!, pet names (baby), language

A/n: Here's something dramatic as fuck lol. I’m getting repetitive with Joel because like he has these few core fears and motives so i need to work on that … anyways here's some that-one-scene-from-a -marriage-story type shit (but not the angry part i just mean the like last 30 seconds…. and like waaay more wholesome. I am unable to end angst on an angsty note. If they won’t give Joel any happy endings I will just have to do it for them)

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When you begin to enter consciousness, the arm you reach out for the body next to you only falls onto the mattress. It wakes you up instantly and you react faster than your body has time to wake up itself, almost falling forward as you hobble to your feet, you yell out for Joel, throat coated in sleep. You swallow, cough, and call for him again.

“I’m here.”

The sound of his voice soothes your heart rate and you breathe deeply, walking from the bedroom into the dining room. Joel leans against the crooked, dust-caked table, back to you, staring out the near translucent front windows.

“...What's up?” it isn’t unusual for Joel to wake up first, but normally he’d stay in bed and wait for you. His demeanor is worryingly off. He doesn't turn to face you but you see his head bow. Walking slowly into the dining room and sliding next to him at the table, you read him with ease—observing the rigidness of his body, the lack of response, and then the disheartenment over his face. You sigh. “Look, we’ve been out here for a long time, it starts to wear on you, but it’s just that. You’re tired, of course you are, Joel. But we’re getting close! We’ll find Tommy and then we’ll… well I don’t know but you’re gonna feel so much better once we find Tommy.”

“If we find Tommy.”

His words shock you completely. If he’s ever had any doubt, he’s never expressed it. Honestly, you saw him as drunk on hope sometimes. The more time you spent with him though, the more you learned about the inner workings of his brain, it isn't naivety, it's that Tommy is his brother, and at the very least, the search is a necessity. He needs an answer, and even if it’s not the one he wants, he needs to at least know that he tried, that he did everything he could.

You’re scared that if Tommy’s dead it’ll break him. You’ve imagined it before, what Joel would be like empty. Even if he decided to stay alive, having lost another family member, the repercussions of that despair would be the death of him. You’d imagined how the acceptance that he never, ever surrendered to would look in his eyes as he gave in to being bitten or shot or stabbed. You simply wouldn’t be enough, and you’re not offended by it. You can’t outweigh the burden of Sarah and Tommy’s death, along with the countless others, many of whom you never met, who live only as ghosts in Joel’s head. Yes, you know loss well and have plenty of heavy ghosts yourself, but that’s only more to why you understand that you just wouldn’t be enough. Tommy would be the straw that broke the camel’s back. But that was all imagination; the contradiction of his behavior and his words were your solace, but now, for the first time, he’s straying from that. And he does it with his back to you, which he never does.

Keeping your voice soft but firmer, “When we find Tommy.” you reassure him.

Joel does not respond, only sighs, keeping his eyes forward. You detect a slight downturn in his lips, distance in his eyes and rare relaxation of his brow. He’s scared. He’s very scared.

“Joel…”

Before you can add anything or your lifted hand can touch his arm, he says, still to the window, “I shouldn'ta brought you with me. I should'a left you in Boston.”

Taken aback, you physically recede. “What?” Is all that comes out of you.

He looks down and blinks a few times before speaking again, and the words march out from his throat—this was planned. While you were asleep, he was running this conversation over and over in his head. “If I was gonna do this I should'a done it alone. You shouldn’t be here.” His tone is perfectly even. Your heart sinks.

“Joel what are you talking about? Why are you saying this?” your voice comes out at almost a whisper, throat and chest constricted by anxious dejection.

“It was selfish.” There's a bite now and you see it’s twinge at the corner of his lip. His eyes become stoney, closed off, and he grinds his teeth together. “That’s all it was. N’ I’m sorry. You don’t belong out here.”

The last sentence pricks you with irritation. “I hate it when you patronize me like this, Joel—” you start, but he interrupts by talking over you.

“It was selfish because I’m putin’ you in more danger than you need to be, then you would’a been in in Boston.”

“I agreed to—” you try to interject but he bars you again.

“Jus’ let me finish this.” His tone is serious. “That’s all true. No matter how shit it is, it’s safer there. You know I care about you, I—I love you,” he still struggles with those words, only recently relearning how to pronounce them, “and I want you safe, I need you safe, and that would’a been the smart option. But I’m stupid and I’m fuckin’ selfish.” your brows knit in a micro expression, head tilted, watching him as he speaks, “N' I need you. Look,” he leans forward and closes his eyes before he continues, “I haven’t seen Tommy in a long, long time. All I have is… a loose idea of where he might have been, shit, whenever the fuck it was when we left. The closer we get, the more… lost I feel.” Joel’s voice is beginning to shake and you can't help but slump a little towards him. “I don’t know if Tommy’s out there. I don’t. I don’t. I want him to be but…” his mouth opens, closes, then opens again, but all that gets out is “I—” and then he opens his eyes and turns away from the table, pacing to the other side of the room, sounding frustrated, “Look, I don’t know if Tommy’s out there. I don’t know if he’s” you can hear his bottom lip wobbling and he cracks at the word, “dead. That’s the honest truth. And the farther we fuckin’ go, the more and more shit we run into, fuckin’ Infected, raiders, people—eveyrthin’. The more and more times I think I might be about t’… that you might die, the more I… I think maybe we never should'a left Boston.”

“Joel—”

“At least there I could protect you.” he begins to raise his voice, “I could get cards, I could trade, I had an in with the guards, we had food, somewhere to fuckin’ sleep everynight. I could come home to you, I wasn’t fuckin’ terrified every time you were outta my sight. Yeah, it was shit, and I didn’t think so then—I couldn’t see it then, but it was safe. We weren’t riskin’ our lives every fuckin’ day like we are out here. An’ winter’s comin’ and I barely know where the fuck we are, I don’t know how I’ll—we’ll—I—” he lets out a sharp breath and leans a hand onto the wall he faces.

“Joel, you’re just tired. You’re underfed and underslept. We’re gonna be fine.”

“Stop fuckin’ sayin’ we’re gonna be fine.” he snaps, whiping back to you, “You don’t know that! Every fuckin’ day we…” whatever look he sees on your face interrupts his train of thought and he strides towards you and puts his hands on your shoulders, “I’m not tryna be mean, baby, I just—” he searches your eyes and turns back. This time he turns, passing the head of the table and walking towards the open kitchen. “This was stupid and reckless. I went out n’ risked the only thing I have left. It was stupid.” he hits his head with the heel of his hand and you rush over, grabbing his arm to turn him around.

“Joel, stop it. I understand, you’re scared—”

“I’m not scared—” he glances away from you.

“Yes you are.” you tell him sternly. “And it’s fair. You don’t know where your brother is. And it’s fucking scary out here. I get scared! But I keep going, we keep going. And we’re in Wyoming now! We’re so close! We are going to find him.”

“Well we might fuckin’ not, and then we’ll be stranded here in the middle a fuckin’ nowhere Wyoming, in fuckin’ winter, no protection, not from raiders, Infected, we could starve—shit” his pitch heightens, “I am scared. I’ve started havin’ dreams about…” he digs your eyes again and rips away from you, making a sound and running a hand through his hair. Then his voice is loud and shuddering, “If you get bit, I’m—I’m gonna have to shoot you. I see it every goddamn night. Clear as day.” At that, he cracks, his shoulders jolt once and he stops a sob right before it leaves his mouth.

The sound startles you. “Joel, baby,” You move towards him once again to rub your hand up his back. He lets you for a moment but then pulls away.

“I can’t—no, I, I c…” he trails off again. “Should’a never taken you with me. Should’a never fuckin’ left, because, becau…” he struggles with himself. When he turns and finally looks to you, Joel’s eyes are wet. “I can’t fuckin’ do this without you.” Joel rakes both his hands through his hair, “And I don’t want to fuck up n’ it gets you killed, and I will fuck up, and I just–” he spins back, then rips his hands away to swing to his sides, “I can’t lose you, I can’t.” when he turns back to you the tears are barely hanging onto his waterline and he raises his voice, “I don’t know what to do, because I–Jesus fuck.” turning again, he takes a few steps forward and then reverses them. His breathing is heavy and he’s sniffling. “I fuckin’ hate this.” His voice is low now, “I hate–I hate carin’ about people, cause I'll just lose ‘em. I just lose ‘em. I just lose ‘em.” he trails off, near whispering. “I can’t fuckin’ lose you. Not you.” he speaks up, shaking his head, “Not you.” He finally turns to look at you but then swings his head down to try to hide the tears that have begun streaming down his face, “Fuck. I’m sorry. I should’t be sayin’ all this. Fuck, I’m sorry.”

“Joel,” in an instant, you've wrapped your arms around him, holding him to you by his neck. He falls into the embrace, wrapping his arms around you and pressing his brow to your neck. You hold him tightly as he starts to shake, you know that he’s trying to hold back the tears. “It’s ok.” You reassure him quietly, sweeping a hand up and down his back. After a moment Joel complies and his body begins to tremble as he weeps in your arms. You hold him tighter, more securely to you. Losing control, Joel starts wailing, grabbing at you. He slides down to the floor, pressing his face into your belly with his arms still wrapped tightly around you, you lower yourself slowly with him, and on the ground, he crumbles in your arms.

It’s frightening. You’ve never seen him like this. You’ve seen him shed tears, get emotional, you’ve had him vulnerable, you’ve seen him even completely relaxed one or twice, but you’ve never seen him torn open like this. You’ve never heard these sounds. His body is shaking uncontrollably, not like you know it to be. His hands grip the fabric of your clothes tightly. The dam has finally broken. It’s heart wrenching. He must have been holding this in for years.

You hold him for a long time. He keeps trying to stop the crying but the current floods everything in him, and the only way to stop himself from drowning is to let it break and release it out into your body, wearing you like a lifejacket. Once he quiets some it still takes awhile for his body to quit shaking through sob-like breaths. When his breathing slows, you can’t tell if he’s fallen asleep, completely lax in your arms, face weighing into your shoulder. But then he moves, pulling himself up to sit, his head hanging. His voice is quiet and hoarse and he sniffles, “I’m sorry.”

“You have no reason to be sorry.” you move to hug him now with your arms around his neck, “I love you.”

Joel wraps his arms around your back, pulling you closer to him, basically onto his lap, and murmurs, “I love you so much.” After a few deep, slow breaths, he pulls away, removing you from his lap, he rubs his hands over his face, mindlessly searching the floor. “I shouldn’t be putin’ all this on you. I’m sorry. I don’t want y’ to… think of me like this, shakin’ on the ground.” he sniffles hard and then looks up, only to your clothes, “Shit, did I fuck up your clothes? Fuck.” he goes to flatten out where his hands as gripped them, brushing over the wet spots from his face, nose, and mouth. “Fuck.” he mumbles.

His face is blank and he won’t look in your eyes—he’s trying to cover himself back up. You don’t think he remembers how to not anymore; you’ve seen it so many times, when he really opens up, spreading open his skin so you can really look inside, it never lasts long enough for you to be able to reach into him. But you can tell he’s so desperate for it, to be seen, to let go. You can tell by the way he’ll hold onto you sometimes, when he doesn’t want to let your hand go, squeezes you in this certain way, and this look in his eyes sometimes, there's such a deep longing, and desolation, but then he blinks, looks away, and it's gone. It’s not something for you to bring up. You just try your best when you see it to somehow communicate to him that it's okay, he’s safe with you. You think he knows that, he’s never done anything to show disagreement, he’s let you in much further than he has anyone else, but there's parts of himself you can see him still hiding away. And now, he has just completely broken down before you. And this is not his role—Joel is a protector, he thinks he needs to be armored all the time, that he’s the one to comfort, not to be comforted. He’s the one to hold onto, to crawl into, to be safe in his arms with. It’s not hard to see through him and past it, though. You wonder often if, before all this, did he already have all this concrete stuck on him, or is there’s a version of him you never got to see? Right now, Joel is completely raw, and you want to hold him here, because you need to tell him—

“Joel, it’s ok. You can relax. You’re safe with me. You can let go with me. You can be soft with me. I’m not going to hurt you. I love you, I want you, I need you to know that you're safe, you can let go with me.” You tilt your head to try to get under his eyes and gently pull a hand over his cheek and towards you to lift his face to look at you. He follows your touch but struggles to meet your gaze; and you are patient with him. Always. God, his eyes are devastating when you finally see them, you swear they're going to be the death of you. Unable to help yourself, you start kissing his lips softly. He only lets you—kisses you back, but there's none of the usual zeal. He really did just drain himself. He makes little noises when your lips meet his, but they’re more like chirps than anything else, another sound you’ve never heard from him. These are some of the sweetest, most innocent kisses you’ve ever shared. They need not be rushed, hungry, desperate. They’re basic, simple, candid.

And then you just breathe with each other, lips still almost touching, and then he pulls you into another tight hug, arms around your neck with you back in his lap, burying himself into your collar. He’s held you like this countless times, but this has a new, full tenderness. He finally surrenders and lets it flush him. His breaths are deep, slow, and even; they feel like his lungs can expand fuller than before. You feel it warm on your skin, under his nose in the dip of your collarbone and his brow against your neck. He’s heavy, resting his weight on you, not holding it back. Never has he been this unwound, the only comparison being sometimes in his sleep, but his sleep is not a safe place for him. This is.

He takes a deep breath and he doesn’t have to speak for you to hear the I love you. You rub a hand up and down his back, turn your head to kiss his head and then bring him closer to say it back.

#the last of us #joel miller #tlou #joel miller x reader #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #joel miller fan fiction #joel the last of us #joel tlou #joel miller tlou #the last of us hbo #tlou hbo #joel miller fic #the last of us fic #tlou fic #joel miller angst #joel miller fluff

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