#but my overthinking brain wants to panic

[goforth-ladymidnight]

A Second Chance

Ch. 6

Pairing: Tamlin x Lucien

Word Count: 5.2k

Summary: Fluff and stuff

Read on AO3 or keep reading below:

“So… what happens now?”

“Whatever you want.”

Tamlin dropped his gaze to look at Lucien’s hand still resting in his hand, at the subtle differences in color in their skintones. Tamlin’s hand was the sort of tan you get from being outside too long, while Lucien’s seemed to have the glow of the sun within it. It was as warm and soft as a spring day after a long winter.

“What are you thinking about?”

Tamlin felt himself blush. “My hand. Your hand,” he said softly. It was all he could think to say.

“Is it okay if I say I was thinking about your mouth?”

His blood caught fire. As he looked up and into Lucien’s warm brown eyes, he managed a nod.

Lucien smiled. “Is it okay if I kiss you?”

He managed to nod again.

Lucien chuckled as he leaned in. “Come here.”

As Lucien’s fingers slid through the sensitive hairs at the back of Tamlin’s neck, and as his lips softly melded to his own, Tamlin discovered that being kissed by a man was very, very different from kissing a woman.

For one thing, it was far more tender than he had thought it would be.

Feyre had always been so eager, so passionate, and he wanted to make her happy. He often let her take the lead, because she seemed to know what she was doing and what she wanted more than he did. He remembered her lip balm, and lilac-and-pear hand lotion, and lacy underwear with all of its confusing straps and hooks, and the chocolate torte from her favorite restaurant afterwards. Everything had been very… sweet. Like having dessert all the time. The funny thing was, he’d never had much of a sweet tooth.

But with Lucien, from the black coffee they had shared down to the citrus-y notes of his cologne, it was like sampling a three course dinner… and he was starving.

As their kisses began to quicken, Tamlin made some kind of small noise that must have been the lovemaking equivalent of a stomach growling—guttural and discomfiting and completely involuntary—because Lucien pulled his warm mouth away to murmur something, and it took him a moment to understand what it was.

“You okay?”

“Mm? Mm-hmm.” Tamlin tasted his lips and tasted Lucien and could think of nothing else.

“Am I moving too fast?”

Tamlin shook his head, but Lucien moved off him anyway.

“It’s okay, Tam. We don’t have to rush.” He smiled to himself as he patted Tamlin’s chest. “We have all night.”

Tamlin shook his head to clear it as Lucien sat up. “W-we do?”

“Oh…” Lucien paused from smoothing back his hair. “I guess we didn’t really discuss it. Did… did you want me to take you home? Because I can.”

Tamlin thought about Jurian’s cold, dark apartment with its broken couch and stained carpets, then shook his head. “I want to stay. I-if that’s okay.”

“Of course it’s okay,” Lucien said warmly, then said something in Scythian.

“What does that mean?”

“My home is your home.”

“One couch is as good as another,” Tamlin joked, then when Lucien stared at him, he faltered. “I-I guess.”

“You sleep on the couch?”

Tamlin rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, yeah… It’s only a one-bedroom apartment, so…”

“You sleep on the couch?!”

Tamlin shrugged and crossed his arms. “It’s better than sleeping on the floor.”

Lucien closed his eyes and shook his head. “No. Nuh-uh. No way. You are not sleeping on the couch,” he said, then grabbed Tamlin’s arm and pulled. “Come with me.”

Tamlin was led to the same bedroom that he had had to go through to use the bathroom earlier. All of the furniture matched, from the giant king-size bed with its padded headboard to the sleek nightstands and bureaus made out of polished, dark hardwood.

“You’ll sleep here.”

Tamlin looked between him and the bed. “Isn’t this your room?”

“Yeah… Is that okay?”

Tamlin fiddled with his shirt collar as he began to blush. “Yeah. Sure…”

“Tell you what,” Lucien said, retrieving a pillow next to the headboard. “I’ll sleep on the couch.”

Tamlin stopped him before he could get past.

“Do you want back problems? Because that’s how you get back problems.”

“Then what do you suggest?”

Tamlin blushed. “Um, well… We—we could both, um…”

Lucien’s eyebrows rose as he looked at him sidelong. “Are you suggesting we sleep together after the first date?” He hugged the pillow to his chest and drawled, “Why, Tamlin. I don’t know what to say…”

Tamlin’s face flushed from his neck up to his hairline. “No! No! That’s not what I meant—” he stammered, but Lucien only laughed.

“You’re so cute when you’re flustered, Tam,” he said, then tossed the pillow back onto the bed.

Cute. Tamlin rubbed the back of his neck. His skin was fiery hot. “It’s just, we shared a room back in college, so…”

“Yeah, but that was a room. Not a bed,” Lucien said more seriously. “I don’t want to push you farther than you’re willing to go.”

“I mean… It’s just sleeping, right?”

“That’s up to you.”

Tamlin swallowed hard at the thought. “Maybe this was a bad idea,” he said quickly. “I don’t even have anything to sleep in, so…”

“You want something to…? You know what? That’s okay. Baby steps.” Lucien held up his finger as if something had just occurred to him. “Actually, I think Alex is about your size.”

“Alex?” Tamlin grimaced. “Is this another ex-boyfriend?”

Lucien looked at him askance. “Do I detect a little bit of judgment in your tone there, Tam?”

“What? No!” Tamlin’s face flushed anew. “This is all so new to me, I just… I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I understand,” Lucien said in a gentler tone, then sighed. “This is honestly pretty new to me, too. I’ve been fighting with my dad about it for years now. My mom has been amazing about it, and my brothers are finally coming around, even Alex, so…”

“Oh.” Tamlin blinked and understood. “Oh.”

“Mm-hmm,” Lucien nodded, smiling. “Alexander Vanserra is brother number five,” he explained, then added in a low, confidential tone, “He stays here sometimes when his wife ‘accidentally’ locks him out of their apartment.”

“Oh…” Tamlin nodded slowly. “Well… what happens if his wife decides to lock him out of the apartment?”

“Then he can sleep on the couch.” Lucien smirked. “He always does.”

Tamlin gawked as Lucien went to the large bureau and pulled out some folded clothes from the bottom drawer. “Why would you make him sleep on the couch, but not me?”

Lucien turned and stood with a grimace. “First of all, I don’t make him sleep anywhere. He gets to sleep there. And second of all, you know what it’s like having brothers. I have six. If I set up a spare room or something, they’d feel welcome to stay over a lot more often. I like my privacy.” He held out the bundle of clothes and smiled. “It just so happens that I like you more.”

When Tamlin hesitated to take the proffered clothes, Lucien nudged them closer.

“Don’t worry. They’re clean.”

Tamlin bit his lip and tentatively accepted them. They looked—and felt—like a basic t-shirt and pajama bottoms, but made of a finer quality fabric than he’d ever been able to afford. Not quite silk, but damn close.

“Thank you,” he said quietly, tucking them under his arm. “I didn’t mean to criticize. I just know what it’s like to sleep on a couch, so…”

“I know,” Lucien said gently. “But you’re not my brother, so you get a choice: Would you rather sleep on the couch, or with me?”

Tamlin’s face grew so hot he broke into a sweat.

Lucien smirked at his speechlessness, then winked. “Thought so,” he said, then gave him a friendly slap on the arm. “The bathroom’s through that door, but you knew that already.”

Tamlin watched as Lucien crossed the room to a large walk-in closet. “What about you?”

Lucien turned in the doorway and paused unbuckling his gold wristwatch. “What about me?”

“What are you going to do?”

Lucien gave him a kind, if bemused, smile. “I’m going to change, then I’ll use the bathroom when you’re done. Then we’ll both be ready for bed. Sound good?”

Tamlin’s heart leapt to his throat. Done. Both. Bed. He swallowed hard. “Good,” he rasped.

Lucien nodded, still smiling. “Good,” he repeated, then disappeared into the closet’s depths.

The brown-and-bronze bathroom was enormous, and terribly well-lit. Tamlin faced away from the large rectangular mirror above the marble sink to change clothes. He wasn’t quite ready to face anyone naked, least of all himself. It had been at least six years since he had been intimate with anyone, and that had been with a woman.

He didn’t know exactly how gay men did it. His father had practically beaten all the curiosity out of him, and Feyre had made him feel like he was just like everyone else. But now, standing in another man’s home, getting ready to get into that man’s bed… He couldn’t help but wonder.

“That was fast,” Lucien remarked as he stepped out of the bathroom.

“Yeah, well, my stuff is at home, so…” Tamlin trailed off and blushed as he realized what Lucien was wearing—or not wearing: a white tank and a pair of what looked like luxury sweatpants that hung low and loose around his hips. Lucien’s feet were bare, as were his, and that seemed more intimate than anything they had done on the couch. This was happening.

Blood was beginning to flow where it shouldn’t, so he was grateful when Lucien brought him back to the present.

“You know,” Lucien remarked, turning off the light in his closet. “I could empty out a drawer or two for you, if you’d like to keep some things here.”

As Lucien stepped closer, the smell of his cologne filled Tamlin’s nose and made him heady and hungry: notes of citrus and cinnamon and clove…

“Unless you don’t mind wearing my brother’s old pajamas,” Lucien continued with a wry smile.

“Oh, um…” Tamlin looked down and pinched the fine pale blue fabric covering his chest. “It is a little tight, so…”

Lucien looked him over with a sly smirk. “You say that like it’s a bad thing,” he said in a low, meaningful voice, then nudged him as he passed by. “Go on. Get comfortable. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”

Tamlin let out a sudden breath as the bathroom door closed behind him. His heart and his lungs and his head were on fire. Nothing seemed real.

Especially the bed. The pillows looked like they were covered in chocolate satin, and the thick, quilted duvet looked like layers of whipped cream. Like swimming in a sea of rich hot chocolate.

As Tamlin slipped between the silky satin sheets, he couldn’t help but moan as the mattress cradled his body in just the right ways, like that little fairy story his mother had told him as a child. Not too hard, not too soft, but just right. Perhaps he’d wake up to find three bears staring down at him, or even Jurian nudging him awake on his way to the kitchen because he’d slept too long.

Even if this was a dream or fairy tale, he was going to savor it. His eyes had just drifted closed when the bathroom door opened, and his eyes shot open, too. Right. This was Lucien’s bed, and he was in it.

Lucien smiled at him as he stepped closer. His hair was pulled back into a high half-ponytail, and he was rubbing something onto his hands that looked and smelled expensive. “Are you still awake?” he asked gently. “You look so comfortable, I couldn’t tell.”

Tamlin had the covers pulled up to his chest. “I’m afraid if I move I might actually wake up.”

Lucien chuckled, then looked thoughtful as he put his hands on his hips and looked him over. “Are you okay with this? I could still sleep on the couch, you know.”

“So could I.”

Lucien shook his head. “That is not going to happen,” he said firmly, then switched on his bedside lamp. “You’re my guest, and my friend, and—” He paused before he pulled back the covers. “—Would you mind if I said ‘boyfriend’? Because we don’t have to be exclusive if you’re not ready.”

It was getting difficult to breathe. “You mean like… friends with benefits?”

“If you like.”

Tamlin stared at the ceiling fan high above his head. “I—I’m not sure yet.”

“Yeah,” Lucien said softly, finally pulling back the covers. “We only met this morning, so…”

“It seems like longer than that,” Tamlin remarked as Lucien slipped between the sheets. The mattress barely dipped from Lucien’s weight, but the presence of him, the heat of him was more than palpable, even though he was on the other side of the bed. It made him shiver.

“Yeah,” Lucien said again, settling onto his back. After a moment’s pause, he turned his head and motioned to the television on the other side of the room and said, “Do you want to watch something? I don’t, usually, but if you want to…”

“No, it’s fine.”

“Okay,” Lucien murmured.

Tamlin was sure Lucien could hear his heart beating. His pulse was thrumming like violin strings as he laid there… It had been so long since he had played. Would he even remember how? Would he like it? And most importantly, would Lucien like it…

“Tam?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m really glad you’re here.”

Tamlin turned his head at that. “You are?”

Lucien smiled. “Yeah.” He turned onto his side and propped himself up onto his elbow. “After all these years, I finally know you’re safe… It’s nice.”

Tamlin considered this as he shifted the blanket around his shoulders. “I thought about reaching out, but… I didn’t want you to worry.”

“Well, I did worry.”

Tamlin swallowed hard. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. We’re together now, and that’s what matters.”

“Yeah. Together,” Tamlin echoed, then took a quivering breath.

“Hey. We don’t have to do anything tonight. It’s been a long day. Why don’t we get some sleep, then we can talk in the morning.”

“Yeah,” Tamlin whispered. “Okay.”

Lucien looked thoughtful for a moment, then asked, rather shyly, “Would it be all right if I… kissed you goodnight?”

A nervous laugh threatened to bubble out, but Tamlin managed to squelch it. “Okay.”

Lucien leaned in, then paused, hovering over him. “Where?”

“Where? Um, anywhere, I guess.”

Lucien smirked. “Anywhere?” he asked in a low, sultry tone.

Tamlin’s head emptied. “Uh…”

Lucien’s smile was bright in the dim light as he leaned in to kiss Tamlin’s forehead. “Good night,” he murmured, then trailed another kiss down to one eyelid, then the other. “Good night,” he whispered again, then kissed Tamlin on the mouth, and lingered.

If Tamlin’s hands hadn’t been knotted in the sheets, he might have reached up to keep Lucien there, but he had already moved away by the time the thought occurred to him.

“‘Night, Tam,” Lucien said, settling back in between the covers.

“Good night, Lu,” he managed. Each kiss seemed to sparkle on his skin. “Hey, Lu?”

“Yeah?”

“I… Thanks.”

“For what?”

“I don’t know. For this.” He tasted his lips. “For—for kissing me goodnight.”

He could hear Lucien’s smile as he replied, “Anytime, Tam,” then switched off his bedside lamp.

Tamlin took a deep breath, then somehow found the strength to turn over onto his side to blindly face the center of the bed, and the sheets rustled as he could hear and feel Lucien doing the same.

When it had been silent for a minute, and only a minute, he whispered into the darkness, “Hey, Lu?”

“Yeah?”

“This is going to sound incredibly stupid, and-and juvenile, but—”

“No, it won’t,” Lucien said gently. “Tell me.”

Tamlin sighed, then found his courage to ask, “Can… can I hold your hand?”

There was a moment of surprised silence, and he was prepared for the answer to be: You’re right, that was completely juvenile, when a warm, steady hand reached out and found his in the dark, then turned his hand so that Lucien’s fingers could slide between his fingers… until their palms connected.

“Like this?” Lucien whispered.

Lucien’s hands were so much softer than his own that it was a wonder he didn’t drop Tamlin’s hand entirely. Much to his astonishment, Lucien’s thumb even rubbed his own, gently.

“Yeah,” Tamlin breathed. “Like that.”

Lucien’s breath was warm against the back of his hand as he brought his lips to Tamlin’s knuckles, then lingered.

Tears sprang to Tamlin’s eyes at the softness, the tenderness. He couldn’t remember the last time anyone had touched him without obligation, just because they wanted to be near him.

“Sweet dreams, Tam,” Lucien murmured against his skin.

Tamlin managed a smile, and his voice came out in a husky whisper. “Yeah. You, too.”

He didn’t think it was possible, but he fell asleep shortly after that. They were still holding hands.

* * *

Lucien rarely remembered his dreams, and when he did, it was rarely about the past. No doubt Tamlin’s reappearance in his life had unlocked a memory, and it was a bittersweet one. He dreamed about the end of summer, and the way the dust motes swirled in the slanted golden light of his dorm room window. He could still feel the thumbtacks between his fingers as he pulled down the last of his photos from the worn corkboard hanging above the empty desk sitting on his half of the room.

He sighed as he halfheartedly thumbed through the stack of photos he had taken over the last two years. “I guess that’s everything,” he said with a thoughtful frown. “Are you sure you don’t want to keep any of these?” he asked his roommate sitting on his bed.

Tamlin stood. “You need something to decorate your new room,” he said with a wry, hesitant smile, then added, “Besides, you might forget what we look like.”

Lucien snorted softly. “As if I could. We’ve been sharing a room forever.” He tapped his temple. “Your face is burned into my brain.”

Tamlin chuckled, then took something out of his back pocket. “And speaking of burning…” Lucien took the proffered photo as he continued, “I got everyone to sign it.”

Lucien barked a laugh at the sight of them and the rest of the so-called High Lords sprawled around the room, stoned out of their minds. He turned it over and read: Tam, Tarquin, Kal, Thesan, Rhys…

“It just needs your signature,” Tamlin hinted.

Lucien smirked. “Why? You think I won’t remember my own name?”

“Dude. That whole night is a blur.” He jerked his thumb at the potted plant soaking up the sun behind him. “Besides. Think of this as a keepsake of the last time we were all together, since we can’t go to Scythia with you.”

Lucien felt tears prick his eyes even as he smiled, then hid it by bending over the desk to add his signature to the back.

“That’s L-U-C-I-E-N,” Tamlin prompted.

“Dude, shut up,” Lucien said, laughing. He nearly messed up his own name, but finally managed to add his scrawl to the top right corner.

Tamlin grinned at him as he straightened up. “See? That wasn’t so hard.”

“Dude.” Lucien laughed, and playfully shoved him.

Tamlin barely flinched, but continued to smile.

His golden hair curled across his forehead and around his ears, and the amber flecks in his warm green eyes shone brightly in the afternoon light.

Lucien’s chest grew tight. “I’m going to miss you, man,” he said quietly.

Tamlin’s smile faded as he nodded. “I’m going to miss you, too.”

Lucien was grateful when Tamlin opened his arms first for a shared embrace. He had come a long way since his first day, when he had looked at Lucien with such distrust, and, almost, fear. Now he held his arms wide without hesitation, and Lucien went into them gladly. They thumped each other’s backs the way friends do, then held on a little longer.

Lucien’s fingers curled into Tamlin’s shirt as he tried to hold back tears. “I love you, man,” he whispered, muffled against Tamlin’s broad shoulder.

Tamlin’s hand slid across his back and held him tight. “I love you, too, Lu.”

They held on a moment longer, then parted to each furtively wipe their cheeks.

Lucien sniffed and slid his hands into his pockets, then had a sudden idea. “Oh, you know what? Here.” He drew out one of his most prized possessions and offered it to his best friend. “I want you to have this.”

Tamlin stared at the gift, then at him. “Your camera?” he asked gently. He looked tempted to take it, then shook his head. “No way, man. I can’t accept that. You need it for when you go to Scythia…”

Lucien shrugged dismissively. “I’ll get my mom to buy me a new one,” he insisted. “Or maybe she can convince my dad to buy me something for once.” He let out a snort of disgust. “I swear, it’s like I’m not even his son for the way he treats me. You know, he didn’t even want to pay my tuition, even though it wouldn’t make a dent in his bank account.”

Tamlin smiled sadly, then nodded. “I know what that’s like,” he said softly, then bit his lip, staring at the proffered camera. “Are you sure about this?”

Lucien nodded. “I’m sure.”

Tamlin tentatively accepted it with a soft ‘Thanks, man’, then hefted it with a surprised laugh. “Geez, you take photos with this thing? It feels like a giant paperweight.”

“You’ll get used to it,” Lucien said with a grin. “Then maybe you can send me something when I’m in Scythia, so I can see how you’re doing.”

“Yeah, if I can figure out how,” Tamlin said, turning it over. “Hey, show me how it works, or it really will be a giant paperweight.”

Lucien smiled, then stepped closer to point out the buttons and controls. After Tamlin took an experimental photo of him, he suggested, “Hey, why don’t we take one last picture together? That way I don’t forget what you look like.”

Tamlin smirked as he lowered the camera. “I thought my face was burned into your brain.”

“It is, but… What if I get amnesia? Or you get kidnapped and I have to give your photo to the authorities so they know who to look for?”

Tamlin rolled his eyes. “I don’t think you have to worry about that,” he said, then held out his arm. “Come here.”

Lucien remembered the way Tamlin’s strong arm slid around his shoulders and held him close, and the way their heads touched as he held up the camera.

“Wait,” Tamlin said, lowering it again. “Saying cheese is too cheesy. How about… ‘Scythia’?”

Lucien’s heart twinged, but he managed a smile as he looked into Tamlin’s eyes. “Sure,” he agreed, then looked at the lens as Tamlin held the camera out at arm’s length.

“Okay… One, two, three… Scythia!”

“Scythia…”

Click.

Lucien opened his eyes, and for a moment, he didn’t know where he was. The room was dim, and the sky beyond the windows was barely gray.

A low voice moaned beside him, and he lifted his head from the pillow in alarm. As his wild heartbeat began to slow, he shifted onto his side and squinted at the person sleeping beside him.

His hair was much longer than it had been in his dream, so long that it spilled across the pillow he was hugging to his cheek. The blanket had fallen down to his waist, revealing a pale blue sleep shirt stretched across a muscular torso. His body rose and fell with each soft, steady breath. Despite Lucien sidling closer, Tamlin slept on.

Lucien smiled as he remembered the night before. He was tempted to bend down and kiss Tamlin’s forehead again, but he didn’t want to wake him. Besides, he wasn’t sure how he would react. Tamlin had looked so… surprised every time Lucien asked if he could touch him. It was like they were starting over from scratch. He had to tread carefully.

As gently and carefully as he could, Lucien lifted the blanket up higher and drew it over Tamlin’s shoulders. Even though the room was by no means cold, Tamlin still let out a relieved sigh and relaxed beneath the heavy blanket’s warmth.

Lucien smiled fondly, then carefully withdrew to swing his legs over his side of the bed. He had a fire to light, some coffee to brew, and a very, very important phone call to make.

* * *

Sweet dreams, Tam, Lucien had whispered in the dark. Like magic, Tamlin dreamed about apples. Specifically, sliced cinnamon-and-sugar apples with a pinch of clove, fresh out of the oven. He even started to drool.

The dream world blurred into reality as something warm and fragrant wafted below his nose, and he swallowed. “Are those apple latkes,” he murmured, “or am I dreaming?”

Lucien sounded rather pleased with himself as he said, “Open your eyes and see.”

When he did, the first thing he saw was an open styrofoam container holding a batch of freshly made latkes, just the way he liked them. There was even a sprig of mint on top. “Dude,” he moaned, then looked up to see Lucien grinning from ear to ear. “I think I love you.”

Lucien chuckled, then sat down on the edge of the bed. “Hey, at least buy me dinner first before you start spouting poetry.”

Tamlin groaned as he sat up, then scrubbed at his face with one hand as he accepted the container with the other. “Didn’t I already do that?”

Lucien was silent a moment, then breathed a laugh. “Yeah. I guess you did.”

Tamlin sighed and managed to open his eyes to a squint. “What time is it, anyway?”

Lucien paused from opening his own container to glance over his shoulder. “Umm… Almost nine. I thought about letting you sleep, but I wasn’t sure how long you would, and I really wasn’t sure how well latkes would reheat.” He pointed with his plastic fork at the nightstand at Tamlin’s side. “You’ve got a fresh cup of coffee there if you want it, by the way.”

“Hmm? Oh, thanks,” Tamlin murmured, then set the container down between his blanketed legs to reach for the steaming mug. After a sweet sip of that heavenly caffeine, he sighed, then asked, “Did you really go all the way out to Annie’s just for me?”

Lucien was still dressed in the tank top and sweatpants he had worn the night before, but a loose knit sweater now rested around his shoulders in a flattering navy blue. As he caught Tamlin’s eye, he smiled. “No, but I did call and asked if they deliver,” he said, tucking one leg under him. “And you know what?” He reached out and gently slapped Tamlin’s leg. “They do.”

Tamlin thought of Alis’s gangly nephews racing from the warmth of the diner and into the frosty morning to get in their aunt’s car and drive all the way down to Lucien’s place on a Sunday. He sighed, and lifted the mug to his lips for another sip. “I sure hope you gave them a good tip,” he murmured.

“Of course,” Lucien said, sounding mildly offended. “I didn’t inherit my dad’s tight purse strings, you know.”

Tamlin sighed again, feeling more awake now. “Yeah, I know,” he said quietly, staring into his coffee. “I just don’t want to be a burden.”

“You’re not,” Lucien said gently. “I just want to take care of you. And I didn’t want you to wake up and wonder where I’d gone, so…”

Tamlin nodded. “Thanks, Lu,” he said quietly. He ran his thumb over the smooth handle of his coffee mug and thought of Lucien holding his hand the night before.

“How did you sleep, anyway?”

“It was good,” he squeaked, then cleared his throat. “Really good.”

“Your neck doesn’t seem to be hurting you as much.”

Tamlin paused to think about it, then experimentally rolled his neck and rubbed the back of it as he thought it over. “You know, it doesn’t,” he remarked, then smiled in wonder. “A few more nights like this would probably cure me.”

Lucien smirked. “I wouldn’t mind if you wanted to give it a try.”

Tamlin blushed like a teenager and dropped his gaze. “Good to know,” he murmured.

Lucien shifted so that both of his legs were beneath him. “So… I don’t want to make things weird, but, uh, I had a dream about you last night.”

Tamlin’s blush deepened as he looked up. “You did?”

Lucien’s face was a little red as he shyly grinned. “Yeah. It was about the last time I saw you… before yesterday, I mean.”

Tamlin tried to think back, but it was a hazy memory at best. “What happened?”

Lucien shrugged. “Nothing important,” he said dismissively, breaking apart his latkes with his fork. “I just mentioned it because I can’t believe you’re really here, that’s all.”

“Yeah… Me, neither,” Tamlin murmured.

He had just taken that first sweet bite of applesauce-laden latke when Lucien spoke again.

“Hey, Tam?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you remember that time we draped lights over your plant and sang ‘O Christmas Weed’?”

Tamlin closed his eyes and shook his head, chuckling. “God. I do, now,” he said with his mouth full.

Lucien twirled his fork with a shy, thoughtful smile. “So, I was thinking… Maybe we could do something like that this year. You know, but with a real tree.”

“You want to get a Christmas tree? Now? In the middle of December?”

Lucien winced. “Yeah, well. I didn’t really have anyone to celebrate with… before now.”

Tamlin pointed at himself. “You want to celebrate with me?”

“Don’t look so surprised,” Lucien chided with a smile. “I know you said Christmas isn’t really your thing, but… seven years is a long time. We have a lot of catching up to do.”

As Tamlin sat back and considered it, Lucien went on.

“I mean, we did sleep together, so… Decorating a tree together seems pretty tame, don’t you think?” he teased.

Tamlin chuckled and glanced away. “Yeah, it does.”

“If it sounds like too much work, we can get something small,” Lucien suggested. “Or, maybe, if you wanted to, we could invite Vassa and your friend Jurian over to help decorate.” He shrugged. “You know. See how things feel.”

Tamlin’s gaze dropped down to the coffee in his hand to the container of still steaming latkes resting between his legs, to the pajamas he was wearing, to the extremely comfortable bed he was still sitting in. “Yeah,” he said, then smiled up at Lucien. “I’d like that.”

Lucien’s answering grin was a thing of beauty, and he nodded. “So would I.”

#did anyone notice i stopped counting chapters #this story has taken on a life of its own #it's great #but my overthinking brain wants to panic #so before i panic #here's a new chapter #enjoy #tamcien #tamlin x lucien #lucien x tamlin #acotar fanfic #my fanfiction #my writing

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

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#okay like ten minutes ago i made a post about how anxiety is making my oife difficult #because i wanted to text a friend but i was too scared to #i just wanted to update you all and say that i texted the friend!! #i texted them a silly little meme that reminded me of them #literally our first 1 on 1 communication and its a meme and a message that just says 'you' #fuck should i have had my first text to them be better?? #i need to start taking my anxiety meds again #... #anywho #I'm gonna go panic and overthink now #fuck they opened the message #and are currently typing #fuck they responded #welp time to never text them ever again #goodbye dear friend. i can never communicate with you again #because theres a goblin running my brain #no it's fine i opened the message #it's fine it's all fine #i need to go to bed

[deformedwaffle]

So… guess who had a panic attack

#me lmao #that was fucking wild #bro I feel like shit rn #i feel so nauseous #and my hands are shaking #it’s not as bad now #but I can’t bring myself to study anymore #it just makes me more nervous #i just want to disappear #but I have to take the test tomorrow #I just want to rest #like why do I overthink #why am i so dramatic #it’s a test. ppl shouldn’t have a panic attack over that #that’s bullshit #what is wrong with my brain #I don’t know anymore

[caught-in-the-filter]

.

#Kayla tag rants #ignore me honestly #why can/do I overthink and underthink everything at the same time and how do I make my brain kindly stfu? #I’d like to stop feeling like shit about *good* things and just be able to accept them as they are #instead of constantly thinking I’m not thinking enough and waiting for it to just fall apart #while also thinking I’m thinking too much and should just let myself have the happiness #I sabotage myself every other minute in my head going back and forth between excited and breaking down #I don’t know how to not be on edge all the time #this is about nothing in particular. just a general feeling of anxiety and dread. not sure what’s causing the panic attack this time. #though I guess not knowing a cause is what it means to have a panic attack. so. #anyway I guess my body says it’s time for me to not really be able to breathe. because I guess it doesn’t want to let me go to bed. fun fun.

[maiko-san]

Catnap + Dogday x Reader ( Part 4 )

<<< Part 3

Relationship : Fluff

Warning : None (?)

Plot : Every time you enter the Playcare you feel eyes watching you everywhere you go. You feel stressed and start to become sick.

Recently, you feel uneasy and something tells you that you were being watched. Every time you go to work, you feel eyes on you.

It scares you.

Nobody likes the feel of being watched.

It made you stressed out.

You tried to get rid of these feelings by distracting yourself with work. You tried to keep yourself busy to a point you overwork yourself with all those papers or taking care of the Smiling Critters.

To a point it made your body ache and have a migraine from overthinking.

Not only that, Catnap has been acting quite differently too and his visit has become less and less each day. Not only that—

The lovely and sweet cat is avoiding you!

You finally asked the feline, what's the matter but only received—

"It's nothing...."

Nothing....nothing? Obviously there's something wrong!

Multiple questions began to swarm into your brain like a raging tsunami, did you do something wrong? It must be you, right? Yes, no? Maybe?

You had a slight feeling it has something to do with the higher ups.....

Did they tell Catnap to...avoid you? It has to be it, right? Why they do such a thing?

The stress starts to eat you the more you think about it.

Dogday and the other smiling critters saw that you've been stressed lately to a point it started to affect your health. It made them worried, especially Dogday. As a leader, it was his responsibility to care for everyone's wellbeing, including you.

"Angel, You look nervous lately. Are you feeling alright?"

"Oh, hey. Dogday....."

Dogday knew something was wrong. He comes closer to you and touches your shoulder.

You slightly flinch under his touch which made the canine even more worried.

"Angel, please tell me. Is something bothering you?"

"......"

"As a leader, it's my duty to help everyone in need. I won't forgive myself if anything happens to you"

"....."

Dogday holds your hands gently and holds them in his large ones.

You take a deep breath before telling him what's been bothering you, you know it will be useless to ignore the canine. He is stubborn and won't stop until you tell him what's wrong.

"I feel like something bad is going to happen. I don't know when. It might happen now, Sooner? Tomorrow?"

"......"

"I really hate this feeling, Dogday.....I-I can't get rid of it and no matter how many times I tried to forget it by distracting myself with work, I just.....couldn't— Not only that, Catnap has been ignoring me and started to avoid me! I— ugh, m-my head"

You suddenly drop to your knees causing Dogday to panic and he begins to whine worriedly.

Dogday's heart clenched the way you spoke. You feel scared, anxious and nervous. The canine pulls you into an embrace, in hope that it will help you calm down.

"Let's get you to the infirmary..."

Dogday makes sure that the school doctor treats you and gives you medication.

"Mrs. (L/n), I think it would be better if you take a week off from work"

"A week?!"

"Angel, it's for your own good"

"But—"

"No buts, end of conversation!"

The doctor said sternly you were causing you to snap your mouth shut.

The doctor also recommended you to rest someplace quiet and away from the city and your workplace.

It seems you have to go to your foster parents house, they always welcome you with open arms if you need anything.

"Alright...I'll take the day off..."

But still....that gut wrenching feelings still resides in you....

For today, you need to rest in the infirmary room until you are discharged.

Dogday leaves you to rest before proceeding to make his way back to his stage but before that, he wants to find Catnap first.

Dogday knows that Catnap is great at hiding, but it won't stop him since he has his canine sense helping him.

He sniffs around to find the feline until he sees the cat, snoozing around his stage like he always does.

"Catnap. I need to speak to you..."

"...Speak"

"(Y/n) is sick, have you not noticed?"

"...I know..."

"Then why did you help her with your red smoke? To make her sleep and at ease?"

"....."

Catnap looks away from the dog, Catnap knew that you were sick. It hurts him to see you like that.

He wants to help and comfort you, he really does but...

He had received an order he has to obey. His had to choose between two individuals that he adores. One he worships and the other he loves. Yet, he chose the one he worships, the one that saves his life.

Catnap knew that Dogday will help you and he trusts the dog with you in his care.

Other than that, using the red smoke on you will make everything much worse and potentially kill you in your sleep.

He doesn't want that to happen to someone who cares for him and loves him.

"Why?"

"Red smoke use...on stress person...bad could hurt and... possibly.........kill..."

"O-oh..."

Dogday rubs his arm before turning away, but before he leaves.

"Please, pay her a visit, Catnap. If you do, it makes her less worried and she would be happy to see you again"

"Also, She won't come to work for a week...."

Dogday leaves Catnap's stage, leaving Catnap alone to think about his decision to see you.

A/N : Another chapter finished 😁 . Also, a fair warning for all of you. The future chapters will become darker as it progresses since I want to stick to the plot of the game.

Also, the mascots have their own stages to perform for the orphans!

#poppy playtime chapter 3 #poppy playtime #poppy playtime x reader #poppy playtime dogday #poppy playtime catnap #smiling critter #smiling critter dogday #smiling critters x reader #smiling critters catnap #dogday x reader #catnap x reader

[weneeya]

Hear me outttttttttt

the Gojo scene with Hanami.. but imagine him being that unhinged and pissed because someone touched you.. like 🥴 Please bless us with your work with this!! I’m begging

overprotective w/ gojo m.list | rules

note. ur brain 🤝 my brain I've literally thought about this a thousand times omg thank u for requesting this

You were supposed to be alone on this mission. Everyone had faith in you and they were right to think that way: you were a strong sorcerer. But Satoru had a bad feeling about it. It wasn’t that he didn’t believe in you, in fact he was probably the one who believed in you the most ; but something was off and he couldn’t find what. 

He couldn’t just follow you there, because he knew it would hurt you. You were an overthinker and he didn’t want to put this weight on your mind. So he simply waited for you to come back to Jujutsu Tech, still worried that something could go wrong. 

The first thing that got him out of his mind was his phone ringing. When he saw your name, his heart skipped a beat. It was unusual from you to call him in the middle of a mission, especially as hard as this one. He didn’t hesitate before he picked up the phone. When he heard your trembling voice asking for help, the world stopped around him. Nothing else mattered or even existed right now, except you. 

He had never been this fast in his entire life before. He knew where you were for the mission, so he didn’t have to ask anyone else to come with him. He didn’t need anyone actually, because he was going to destroy the thing that touched you all by himself. 

When he finally arrived where you were, he really thought about going crazy. You were almost on the floor, as way too much blood was leaving your body. You were so pale, he could tell that you were just about to pass out. He reached your height in a second, carrying you to put you on the floor behind him, where you would be safe. He left a kiss on your forehead, sounding way too calm for it to be normal. 

“It’s okay, my love. Stay awake, it’s gonna be quick.” he sounded so soft to your ears, as you closed your eyes and finally breathed again. Everything was going to be fine now that he was here, you knew it. 

When Satoru stood up again, facing the creature that did that to you, a smile appeared on his lips. The last time he felt this angry, he was completely out of control. The only thing that was able to calm him down was when he was sure that his opponent had suffered twice more than what he had done. And this one, it hurted you ; so it needed to suffer even more. His piercing blue eyes were looking at the curse who soon rushed on the exorcist. 

Or at least it tried to. The curse was quickly stopped in his movement, not able to move at all. As it started to panic, trying to fight back, Satoru kind of appeared in front of it. His psycho smile was even more terrifying than before as he slowly tilted his head to the side. 

“Now, we can play,” was the last thing you heard before losing consciousness. The sight of Satoru being feral like this worried you a little, because you knew the man was unstoppable when he was like this. But at the same time, you knew that the mission was going to be handled just right. There was nothing to worry about anymore.

OMG FERAL GOJO he's really driving me crazy I don't even have the words anymore with this man

#gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojo headcanons #gojo hcs #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen hcs #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk headcanons #jjk hcs

[urprettylittlething]

In The Shadows

Purge Alternate Universe

Yandere - Gojo Satoru x Reader x Geto Suguru

A/N - Okayyyy I've been working on this for like a week and it's the longest I've ever written for one thing, I had a shoulder injury which is mostly healed up now during the week which hindered my progress a little because I originally really wanted this to get out nearer Halloween time, but oh well TT at least its here now right? Lmao, but I hope you guys enjoy it, I tried my best and lowkey kind of hate it, I wished I could've done more or something, but if you have any ideas around this for a possible part 2 let me knoww, although no promises ;) Consider this a massive thank you story, I now have over 100 followers and the likes and reblogs and comments, you guys, I'm crying, I love you all so much <333333 I love interacting with you guys and your comments on my stories or in my inbox <3333 you all make my day ilysm <3 :( AND IM SORRY I COULDNT HELP IT, they're kind of really mean so its more harsh yandere than the soft you all wanted :( I couldn't help myself its a purge AU TT, but I promise ill make something softer in the future <33 sorry this is so long omfg, but let me know your thoughts pretty please &lt;3 and if you actually read all of this ily

summary - Another purge night is here and you think your safe and sound, but let your guard down and you'll find yourself bound.

warnings - purge, mentions of 'off screen' murder, actual 'off screen' murder, kind of gore but reader doesn't see it, blood, rope, reader gets tied up, gags?, tape over readers mouth, they're actually kind of really mean lol, especially Geto, descriptions of panic, anxiety, overthinking, stalker situation kind of, swearing, crying, brief hair pulling, if there's any more let me know ml <3

genre - Oneshot

wc - 7.2k

~spelling and grammar fixed already~

Edit - the top photo 6/11/23

The tip tapping of fingers on keys echoed around the silent room. The occasional footfalls of people around her walking up and down. Picking up books to further aid their studying would slip past the music playing in her ears when they were loud enough.

Every time she would hear someone being a little too loud for the library they were in she would glance up and shoot a half-hearted glare their way.

They’d never see her but it was the thought that counted. A barely audible sigh escapes her as she brings a hand up to massage her cold fingertips into the throbbing skin at her temple. 

Nervous nibbling was occupying her teeth and lips, chewing away the flesh and creating tender spots her tongue would soon soothe. 

She’d been staring at the same empty document for two hours now. No more than two sentences she was able to come up with before she’d erase them in a fit of frustration.

Abandoned textbooks lay closed behind her laptop, she’d deemed them no use around thirty minutes in, but she couldn't bring herself to get up and search for better ones. 

She was antsy, not able to focus on her assignment due in a week's time. Her brain was all fogged up, too many thoughts going through her mind and yet she's not able to focus on a single one.

The purge was tonight. March 21st. And it was currently 1pm. 

Why did she even bother to come to the library in the first place? Was she hoping to distract herself even just a little bit before she had to hunker herself down in her dorm for twelve hours? 

Maybe. Yes.

Was it working? Absolutely not.

She was too skittish. Overthinking everything that had the potential of happening later and things that have previously happened. 

‘Someone's not going to come and try to kill me just because I forgot to return their pen that one time, right?’ 

The amusing, albeit a little dark, thought did make the corner of her lips twitch just the smallest amount. 

Taking off her headphones after stopping her music, she closes down her laptop and starts to move it into her bag. 

She spares a quick glance around the few tables next to hers as she stands with the library's books in her arms. Her eyes locked with a man sitting roughly two tables down. Slumped back in his seat.

Gojo Satoru. Bright white and fluffy hair paired with a set of dazzling blue eyes. The ones currently peeking over the tops of his round shades that had slid down his nose as he tucked his head down slightly. 

Sitting in front of him and abstracting her view of Gojo only slightly is who she assumed was Geto Suguru. Two peas in a pod and never seen without the other. The long black and silky strands of hair tied up in a half up bun was a giveaway to who he was as well.

Both of them were originally from Tokyo, Japan. Coming over to America over five years ago. Or at least that's what she’s heard from around the place, not knowing them personally. They were the most popular boys in school when she had joined a little over a year ago and they still held the title strong.

She doesn’t think she's ever really interacted with them. At Least not on any kind of personal level. Sure, maybe from a few friends of friends or passing each other in the hallway and being polite to her upperclassmen, but nothing all that memorable. 

Which is why this prolonged eye contact is sending a very noticeable shiver down her spine. The smallest twitch of a smirk on his face and she was breaking eye contact, gulping down the pooled saliva in her mouth as she turned around and hastily made her way in between the towering bookshelves.

Leaving the library after stacking the books she’d previously taken back on the shelves, she hastily makes her way down the long corridors. Keeping her head down, her hands clutched tight on the strap of her bag. She passes very few people in the hallway.

Even after pushing through the doors and trekking her way to the dorms at the end of the path, there were very few people loitering around outside. Some of the people she passed looked like they could be stoned, not that she could really blame them. Some looked a little too relaxed and happy and some were just trying to get to their destination as quickly as possible. Like her.

As the doors came into view, and then the stairs, she slowly began to relax, her fast pace lessening up. Successfully getting to the safest place she could for when the purge would start. 

It was also a massive relief that her two good friends would be staying with her during the twelve hours of horror. Last time she was by herself there had been multiple scares throughout the night. Nothing too big but something she didn’t think she could handle alone again. 

Reaching her door on the third floor she fiddles with her keys for a few seconds before her door clicks open and she pushes her way inside. Closing the door and locking it again for good measure. 

It was 1:43 pm.

A few minutes after she had arrived back at her dorm did she realize she still needed to pick up some food items. Being a broke student meant she had essentially nothing in her cupboards or her fridge. And if she was ‘hosting for the purge’ this year, it meant she had to stock up at least a little bit. 

‘Imagine trying to hide from a killer and your stomach growls, I think I would just die on the spot.’ She thinks, the smallest smile gracing her face. Humour is usually her way to cope in situations like these. It’s either that or panicking and she’d rather try to save that for the main event.

With a heavy sigh and hesitation weighing her limbs down, she slowly puts her shoes and jacket back on. She can make this quick. In and out. Easy peasy. 

With a quick jump while shaking her limbs out to get rid of her last minute hesitation, she quickly opens her door and steps out before shutting it behind her. No going back now. Locking the door behind her, she starts making her way back down the stairs and out the doors, walking in the direction of the food store. 

Her nerves were still playing up though, eyes darting this way and that as if trying to find a reason for her to panic. ‘It’s okay, the purge hasn’t started yet, all those things are still illegal.’ Is what she keeps telling herself while taking a deep breath. But the fact they won’t be in a few hours was still cause for some panic. 

Arriving at the store, she wizzes around, collecting any good looking snack and throwing it in her basket before hastily paying and leaving. The heavy plastic carrier bag hanging from her fingers gave her reason to think she went a bit overboard. 

Her quickened steps and accelerated breathing were all she could hear for a while. Her walk back to her dorm was supposed to be a quiet one, less and less people were loitering around meaning less and less noises to distract her. 

Especially from the new set of footsteps that have appeared behind her.

As soon as her mind clocked the extra set of footsteps there, it went into overdrive. ‘Who is that? Are they following me? No, you're being delusional, they're just trying to get back home. But are they? They just appeared out of nowhere. Are they going to try and kidnap me? Rape me? Stuff me in a van? Drag me down a dark alleyway and murder me?’

Her mind was racing, steps quickening and breathing silenced under the new threat. ‘Oh god, what if they’re stalking me? Waiting until the purge starts to come and slaughter me? They’re going to kill me. They’re going to kill me. What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?’

And then they were gone. 

It barely registered in her mind that the fast paced footsteps from behind her had vanished. A sharp breath escaped her before her head whipped around on a desperate whim. No one. Not a soul on the path behind her. 

Her shoulders sank with relief and a watery laugh broke free from her trembling lips. ‘I’m losing my mind.’ She thought. Even though that feeling in her gut had faded, it never fully disappeared. Her racing heart never slowed and neither did her footsteps. 

Y/n hurried back to her dorm, almost running through the doors and up the stairs to fumble with her keys and quickly burst in. Double checking she locked the door behind her, and then checking every other lock on her third story apartment. Only when she had made sure they were all secure could she finally relax. 

Her body shivering and hands shaking from the after effects of adrenaline. Her breathing is still a little shaky as she pulls a bunch of pillows and blankets into her tiny living room. Pushing her chair and sofa away to make more space as she lays everything out as neat as she could, making the floor a comfy space for her and her two friends to crash for the purge. 

She empties the snacks from out of the plastic bag and piles them in a nice little corner near the TV. A small stack of movies there for when they’re all waiting for the purge to start. Some cards in a pack were also placed there. 

The three of them are wanting to be as quiet as possible while the purge is going on. Everything locked, curtains drawn, lights off, TV with no volume and only subtitles, quiet games to play in case they got bored, etc. 

They weren’t taking any chances. It was doubtful anything would happen, since nothing really ever did in the dorms. No student here would go as far as murdering somebody, everyone mostly stayed inside, not wanting to risk anything. She only knew of a few people that have snuck out before to rob a few stores, or do some petty revenge like smashing someone's car without getting into trouble.

But overall, it was best to remain quiet. They didn’t want to get murdered because the TV was turned up too loudly and attracted some wrong attention. 

It was 5:15 pm.

This is the time her friends arrived. Knocking some made up code on the slab of wood before messaging just for good measure that it was really them outside. 

After unlocking the door and letting her two good friends inside her dorm she swiftly closes and locks it again. Relieved greetings transpire as well as nervous whispers about the purge and some small gossip of who they think would actually go out this year and who are likely to stay inside. 

The three of them start to make their way around her dorm, closing all the curtains and double checking the locks on all the windows and doors. Especially the balcony and front door. 

After they’ve secured the apartment, they turn off all the necessary lights, flicking on a few electrical lanterns and setting them up around the living room, but away from the windows. They’ve left one lantern in the bathroom and one in her bedroom, both turned off, just in case of emergencies.  

The three of them settle in a spread out pile on the blankets she put down in the living room. Some snacks are passed around already and a movie is slotted into the TV, playing as background noise mostly while they talk.

Erica, a sassy but kind of dumb girl, with choppy shoulder length hair that had been bleached and dyed a light green. She's donned in a crop top and sweatpants, comfy.

Don, a friendly giant, very kind in nature but also a little muscly. He has short black hair and a sculpted jawline. He also came in sweatpants and a baggy white T-shirt, also comfy.

Her two very good, and only, friends here. They’re in a few of her classes and all regularly hang out together. 

“So,” Erica begins after her mouthful of powdered donut. “Who do you think is going to actually purge tonight? Like, actually actually. My moneys on them two hotties in my class.” She finishes, wiggling her eyebrows..

Don hums around his half empty soda can. “Yeah, honestly I wouldn't be surprised if they did.”

Y/n pipes up, “Wait who?” sitting up against the sofa behind her, getting comfy like she's about to hear the gossip of a lifetime.

“Oh, Em, G! You haven’t heard of it? You’ve seriously been, like, living under a rock or something.” Erica says jokingly. Picking apart pieces of her donut and eating them. 

Don perks up too. “Really? You haven't?” Y/n shakes her head in denial as Don shrugs. “I get it, it’s mostly stayed in our class, hasn’t spread much further than that.” He says before crawling forward and rummaging around for more snacks.

“So get a load of this right!” Erica sits up too after finishing her donut. Waving her hands excitedly as she tells her latest gossip. “You know them two really hot upperclassmen right?” She draws out her ‘really’ and waits patiently at the end of her sentence for the other girl's confirmation. 

When she nods in slight confusion, Erica continues, “There were some major rumours in class that the two of them were late this one day because they were beating someone up. And I don't mean like a few slaps or hair pulling, I mean punches. You know?”

Y/n nods again, this time with furrowed brows and Erica continues, “At first, I didn’t believe it, obviously. But then, the two of them came into class and I swear there were blood stains on their clothes. Blood stains! Not to mention all the plasters and bandages all over their hands! I just had to believe it then! Wouldn’t you?”

After the end of her long rant she slumps back against the front of the sofa and mumbles incoherently to herself shaking her head while pouting.

Don, who had been listening silently, pipes up, “It was true, I was actually there for once.”

Y/n’s eyebrows raise in disbelief at what she had just heard. Fighting, here? She couldn’t help but to doubt it, if only just a little. Stuff like that has never happened here. Or at least while she had been here. It was just unheard of.

And for an attack so vicious to result in blood being drawn, then there must have been somewhat of a good reason for it. That was the conclusion she came to.

“I mean, there had to have been a good reason for it.” Y/n says, “They’re pretty nice people aren't they? It is Gojo and Geto were talking about here, right? They’re really popular here too.” Her eyes darted between her two friends, looking for more answers on this unexpected juicy gossip.

Erica sighs wistfully, “No, it got shut down pretty quick, which I guess is why so little people have heard about it. God, would I pay to see them fight though. Their muscles must have looked amazing.” 

They stop talking about it after that, Don getting distracted by the snacks and whining about how she didn’t get his favourite. Erica smacking him with a few pillows and complaining how he’s getting in the way of her movie she was barely even watching. 

Their playful banter did little to distract from her inner turmoil. A small shiver went down her spine again. The memory from earlier in the library resurfacing in her mind. Gojo staring her down, the creepy walk back from the shops and now learning the two had at the very least helped in injuring someone.

It could just be because it was purge day, but everything was beginning to creep her out and she was overthinking again. ‘What if he wants to attack me next? What if all of those things were connected and someone really was following me home? What if he wants to kill me? What if both of them want to kill me? Have I ever done anything to offend them? I haven’t, have I?’ She knew these were far fetched and ridiculous, but she couldn’t help but think of them anyway.

Her spiralling thoughts were halted when a stray pillow smacked her in the face. “Oops, haha, sorry.” Erica sheepishly apologized, bringing her hand up to smooth down Y/n’s ruffled hair. Don was laughing in the background.  

Y/n was stunned for a few seconds before replying, “Oh, don’t worry. How about we put something else on? This movie is kind of boring.” crawling across the piles of pillows and blankets to reach the stack of movies.

This caught the other two’s attention, eagerly rushing to the stack as well to try and get first pick. Arguing for a few more minutes before settling on a movie they all loved. Snuggling back into their original positions.

This was how the next few hours went before the announcement appeared.

It was 6:59 pm.

At exactly 7 on the dot, the TV went black before turning blue, the government announcing the commencement of the purge. Big bold letters and ‘Emergency Broadcast System’ and ‘This is not a test’ were displayed on the screen.

They were all quiet as it played out. The mood quickly turned sombre.

“Weapons of class 4 and lower have been authorized for use during the Purge. All other weapons are restricted.”

Don gulped.

“Government officials of ranking 10 have been granted immunity from the Purge and shall not be harmed.”

Erica huffed.

“Commencing at the siren, any and all crime, including murder, will be legal for 12 continuous hours.” 

Y/n shivered.

“Police, fire, and emergency medical services will be unavailable until tomorrow morning at 7 am when The Purge concludes.”

She released a shaky breath. The announcement ends with “...A nation reborn.” before stopping. The screen turned black again.

No one moves or says anything. Each of them were frozen in an array of emotions. Fear being the most prominent. 

The silence stretched on for minutes. Eerie in its wake, not even being able to hear other people in their dorm rooms like she normally would.

Eventually, after releasing another shaky breath and rearranging herself with trembling limbs, they all snap back into the present. 

Don coughs and Erica shuffles awkwardly. 

“Cards, anyone?” Y/n meekly speaks up. The other two nod as they sit in a small circle. 

It was 7:36 pm.

This was when the first explosion of some kind was heard by them. Each of them froze in the middle of playing their mostly silent game of cards. The noise was distant, but the impact remained.

A scream from a few doors down echoed in the silent space.

They waited with baited breath for any follow up, but when nothing happened, they slowly relaxed. Each of them assumed it was the explosion that must have scared someone. Sometimes it’s better to think of the positive, rather than what that scream could have been for.

A few minutes later a siren bellows in the distance, a few car alarms wail.

Nothing too bad, but knowing that it could mean someone was being murdered out there didn’t give them any ease.

It was 8:02 pm. 

This is when the banging starts. Y/n thinks it could be a few doors down again. Erica thinks it’s below them and Don thinks it’s above them. 

Wherever it was, it was concerning. 

Erica releases a small nervous chuckle. “Maybe someone is just having a good time?” A fake smile plastered on her face to try and mask her worry. Even she didn’t believe her little theory. Not during a time like this, during The Purge.

It was a few minutes later, after they had quietly resumed their game, that footsteps were heard.

Clacking down the hallway. 

1, 2.

1, 2. 

1, 2. 

1, 2. 

They were walking at a leisurely pace. Taking their time. Strolling down the hallway and getting closer and closer.

All three of them looked towards the door, as if someone were to burst in at any moment.

The footsteps slow before coming to a stop. Right outside her door.

The three of them hold their breath, bodies flinching when a light knock rings out into the open space.

Complete silence.

Another knock.

None of them had even noticed the earlier noises had stopped, too focused on the potential threat now right outside the door. Seemingly wanting someone to open up.

Three pairs of eyes dart between each other. Silent questions trying to push their way out without being heard. A few panicked half shrugs and furrowed brows with downturned lips later, another knock rings out.

This time it was a little louder.

Barely audible whisperings of ‘you go’, ‘no you’, ‘fuck no’, ‘who even is it?’ cut through the silence. No one wanted to ask the question. To even speak a hint of it lest it result in it coming true.

Eventually after a solid minute of panicked, almost silent, squabbling later. A frustrated and frightened Erica pushed herself up. Taking a very obvious deep breath. Eyes closed and silently mumbling to herself before taking a few steps over to the front door.

She tried to be as quiet as she could but each step sounded like it weighed a ton. Every creek and every wobble made to sound the loudest. 

Very quietly bracing her hands upon the door, she leant up on her tiptoes. Peeking into the peephole positioned in the centre of the door.

The two left in the pile of blankets still. Not wanting to even breathe in fear of disturbing whatever was happening in front of them.

A sudden screech of pure panic and fear tore from Erica’s throat. Flailing before landing with a harsh thud on the floor beneath her. Scrambling backwards on her hands and feet, keeping her eyes on the door the entire time.

The two startle and immediately jump up, laboured breathing hindering their lungs from the sudden scare.

“What the fuck? Erica what happened? What was that?” Don frantically whispered. His eyes were also locked on the door. 

Y/n also whispered to her, “Who was that? Erica?” her eyes locked onto her friend, not able to bring herself to look at the door yet.

“It was.. Oh god.. The peep..” Erica wheezed out. The fright took too much out of her with her frantic gasps for air.

A sudden bang echoed into the room. A few more followed before they all realized it was coming from the front door. 

Erica screeched and threw herself back into a standing position, rushing for the kitchen and grabbing any sharp knife her eyes first laid on.

Don stood frozen in fear. Not able to move or barely breathe from the looks of it.

Y/n wasn’t any better herself. Downright terrified. This was her dorm. Her dorm. Which means whoever was outside, was looking for her.

The banging persisted, the person on the other side seemingly determined to get in. This proved correct when the handle started turning whichever way it could. 

She didn’t even realize, terror clouding her senses because when she looked back to her two friends, Don had collapsed into himself, wheezing with little air entering his lungs amidst his panic. Erica was cornered in the kitchen, sobbing, tears flooding her cheeks and ruining her mascara she had in place.

The persistent banging stopped for a second. The faint sound of another pair of footsteps approached from the hallway outside. Muffled talking pursued but it was hard to make anything out, between her pounding heart, Erica’s sobs and the slab of wood in the way, didn’t make for easy hearing.

For Y/n, it seemed there was one second of complete silence. No sobbing, no voices, no distant alarms or explosions, no racing heart, no wheezing lungs. Before chaos sprung onto them.

Suddenly the people outside, because there was another person now, resumed banging on the door. But it didn’t seem like they were ‘just knocking’ anymore. No.

They were trying to break the door down. 

She could see it from the way the door groaned and creaked under the relentless kicking. She couldn't quite tell if they were using their feet, or an object, or whatever. 

All that mattered was that they were trying to get in. And they were going to succeed.

“Move! Hide! We need to hide!” She whisper-yelled. Rushing to Don and tugging on his arm to try and get him to move. He stared at her for a few seconds before his brain caught up, registering what was happening around him. The real danger he was in right now.

“Hide.. Oh god..” He panted, sprinting for the bathroom, the first place his eyes had landed on.

With Don now searching for a place to hide, she ran her way to Erica. Still trying to be as quiet as she could, in the little hopes that they would think she wasn’t here.

“Erica, we need to hide! They’re getting in!” She frantically whispered to her hyperventilating friend. Trying to shake her shoulders, even resorting to lightly slapping her face to try and get her attention. She was desperate.

“Please!” The sound of splintering caught both of their attention. Heads whipping towards the door starting to cave. She wasn’t all that surprised, that slab of wood was a shitty excuse for a door anyway.

Erica suddenly sprung up and dove for the piles of blankets in the living room. Trying to bury herself amongst them, taking the knife with her.

And now that all her friends had been taken care of, she ran for her bedroom. Trying her best not to stumble and fall in the dark hallway. 

As soon as her door came into sight, she gently opened it, gunning for her wardrobe tucked into the corner of the room. Not even looking towards the turned off lantern, she didn’t need them knowing her hiding spot from something so obvious. 

It was already messy anyway, so in her frazzled brain she didn’t bother caring where she tossed piles of clothes and shoes in her room.. They’d hopefully think it was like that in the first place.

After quickly clearing a space big enough for her to curl into, she did just that. Situating herself just right, back pressed against the side of the wardrobe, knees tucked to her chest and pressed against the boxes in front of her. She was sitting on old shirts she hadn’t seen for months.

Hearing the door breaking even further, she grabbed any clothes within her reach and threw them over herself. Shutting the door when she was mostly covered, she could have sworn she could hear laughter coming from the hallway.

A loud crash and splintering tore through the air. She knew it was her front door. And now they were inside. 

Her hands slowly went up to cup around her mouth, trying to muffle her breathing as much as she could. Her body froze. Even when she already began to feel muscle cramps settling in, she dared not move. She forced herself to breathe slowly. Every inhale a struggle along with a reminder that she was still alive at this very moment. Even if she was convinced she wouldn’t be for much longer. 

The thought brought tears to her eyes. The original shock wears from her body and settles into something akin to despair. 

Her throat started clamping up, muscles seizing and throbbing with the need to cry. 

It was the thudding of footsteps that shook her out of it. Snapping her half way back into a nightmarish reality. 

She gulped. Closing her eyes and straining her ears for any information they were willing to receive.

Just as she thought. Two pairs of footsteps. 

With every thud of a shoe or a spike in their muffled talking, her body would tremble. 

It remained like this for a few more minutes. The footsteps or talking occasionally pausing. 

It was during one of these silences, where a different sound was heard. She couldn’t identify the exact sounds, just ones of commotion. They were still all muffled. And then she heard muffled yelling. 

It sounded so dulled, between the walls and layers of wood and clothes, she could barely make out anything, her ears straining for any hint as to what was happening. Being left in the dark like this, literally and figuratively, was terrifying her. 

And then this horrible, awful noise carried its way between the cracks in the wardrobe. Crunching. Cracking. Stomps. 

That muffled yelling from before kept getting cut off. Eventually dwindling down into a barely audible groan. Those thuds never seemed to stop either. Never ending, crunching, cracking, and now wet thuds. 

Her brain was trying its hardest to process, to catch up with the information that it has been provided with. 

More footsteps, only one pair, accompanied with muffled laughter. And a more distinct sound traveling through the air. 

A scream.

Even more laughter, hurried footsteps and pleas of ‘no’, ‘please’, ‘don’ts’. 

It was now, with the wet stomps still in the background, her screeching friend, that eager laugh, that her brain had finally caught up.

She was going to be sick.

They’re hurting them. Killing them.

Her friends.

Her body moved out of its own violation. Shaky hands and feet kicking and pushing their way out of the pile of clothes. Wardrobe door swinging open with a creak.

She collapsed out of it. Slumped on the floor, dry heaving. Her lungs not seeming to take enough air in but yet holding in too much. She couldn’t function. Fear overwhelmed every part of her. As well as grief. 

Her ears were ringing and she was left gasping, drool dripping onto the hard floor beneath her as a result of her attempted vomiting. Eyes wide open, blurry when she tapped back into her mind. 

Tears, clouding her vision and dripping audibly on the floorboards below her. 

In the distance she could hear muffled talking. Two men, she could make out more clearly. Not only that, but squelching, wet, gooey noises seemed to mingle in the air. Gurgling was the next before silence.

A minute passed, maybe two before the footsteps started up again. Those goddamn footsteps. 

1.. 2.

1.. 2.

1.. 2.

But they were slower than before. Steady. Taking their time. 

And getting closer.

Her instincts kick in, blinking profusely to try and clear her eyes from the tears, looking up and darting around before landing on the space under her bed.

She wouldn’t have enough time to fix her spot back in the wardrobe. She couldn’t run past them, not even in her best state which she certainly wasn’t in right now. She had considered her bedroom window as an option, but it was locked, which would take time to open. Not even mentioning the fact she was on the third floor, so jumping out would break at least something important. They would be quick to notice as well, and if they came for her, it was likely they would decide to chase her down.

Under her bed seemed to be her best option at the moment, and she was running out of time. Scrambling as quietly as she could, she slid herself directly under her bed, trying to center herself in the middle of it, tucking herself into a tight ball.

The footsteps stopped right outside her bedroom door, she had enough sense to shut it on her way in, thank god. But that clearly wouldn’t be enough to stop them. 

Almost as if the person was teasing her, they slowly clicked the door open. The distinct creak she had grown accustomed to over the months making itself known. 

Her muscles are tense, tightening in the presence of her predators. 

In the dark space from under her bed and in her room, it was obvious when the light from inside the hallway started spilling in the more the door got pushed open. In the vague depths of her mind it registered that they must’ve either turned the hall lights on, had taken one of her lanterns,  or were carrying one of their own.

Her lungs were burning with the effort to keep her body running with the little air she was allowing them to have, all for the sake of trying to keep quiet.

It was all too silent once again, only for a second or two before the second pair of footsteps came towards her. A lot more hasty compared to the other ones. 

Her breath silently hitched, the new person pushed their way into the room, stepping past their company before a thunk was heard. The sound forced her body to startle, jolting her muscles and kick starting her trembling again. An uncontrollable reaction to the fear she was under, the unrelenting motions causing a deep ache in her ribs.

The sound of rustling was now heard. It seemed they were looking for something. ‘They’re going to kill me. They’re digging around for a weapon to stab me with, to bash my head in, to murder me like they did my friends. I’m dead. I’m dead, I’mdeadI’mdeadI’mdead-’

Her racing thoughts consuming her fear riddled mind failed in picking up the sound of the other pair of footsteps slowly creeping round to the end of her bed. 

The person paused, silently crouching down low before a pair of hands reached under.

The sudden tight grip on her ankles followed up by the sudden pull had her screeching. Pure terror flooding her veins. She had been yanked out from under her bed, lying sprawled on the floor and gazing up at the towering man stationed above her. 

Her lungs burned, seizing up before a sickening scream escaped her. Fuelled by genuine, unrestrained horror. 

They had found her.

One of her lanterns they had brought in illuminated his face in a haunting light. The darkened shadows stretching and contorting behind him to create the most grim image for her mind to paint. Not that it was far off.

A foot standing on either side of her hips, straddling her if it wasn’t for his standing position. Hands nestled comfortably back in his trouser pockets now they had done the job of retrieving her. A comfortable looking long-sleeved shirt adorned his figure. Dark splatters starting from the bottom of his shoes and creeping their way up his legs, tapering off into a few spots that painted one of his cheeks.

An easy smile softly ingrained on his face, followed by gentle looking eyes peering down at her if it wasn’t for the malicious spiral she found herself paralyzed in. Dark locks of hair extended down his back, past where she could see from her position, with the top layers sectioned off and tied back into a bun.

His mouth opened and he spoke. “Well, well. Look what I’ve caught for us Satoru.”

Satoru. The other man must be Satoru Gojo, and this was Suguru. Suguru Geto. The most popular guys she knew, the supposedly kindest. And then staring in the library, the walk back from the shops, the gossip her most likely dead friend had told her.

Her body suddenly felt like it was pumped full of adrenaline. Pushing herself up as fast as she could, using the bed as support all the while stumbling over her numb riddled legs. She took off, running towards the open door she so desperately wanted to pass through. 

A sudden arm snatched her from around her waist and she screeched. Pure instinct driving her at this point as she scratched and kicked and flailed in his, Satoru Gojo’s, hold.

The sound of something dropping before his other arm came round, collecting both her wrists in one hand of his. His grip tightened the more she fought. Her body pressed tight against his, her back to his front. His head situated itself on her shoulder, tucking over and pressing his cheek to hers even while she cried and panted and kicked.

She could feel his grin pressing against the side of her face. “Such a pretty little thing we have here. Can’t let her get away so easily now, can we? Not after all the trouble we’ve gone through.” The last part practically whispered into her ear as she turned her face as far away as possible from him. 

A little laugh boasted out from Geto. “Of course not.” He strolled over to them, bending down to pick up what Gojo had dropped in order to restrain her.

Rope.

Fucking rope.

The moment her eyes zoned in and processed what Geto was unravelling in his hands she tried to fight back even harder. Eyes flooding with tears that spilled down her cheeks. Short mumblings of ‘no’ being repeated over and over while becoming louder until she was yelling. 

“Please don’t do this! Let me go! Please, please.. Stop!” She shrieked while sobbing, convinced they were going to kill her or torture her or something horrible like that.

Gojo walked the two of them to the edge of her bed before forcefully pushing her down, manhandling her onto her front and bending her arms to rest pressing against her back.  

She sobbed into her ruffled sheets as she felt Geto fastening the rope tight around her wrists, the rough material digging into and pinching the sensitive skin. Raw and red marks already forming amidst her struggle. 

Her legs still hung off the bed, trying their best to kick and hopefully injure one or both of them, but she knew it was a losing battle. None of her landing blows made them falter in any way.

When her wrists were successfully restrained Geto kept them pressed to the small of her back while Gojo let go and reached down to grab her ankles. Pulling them up and bending her legs at the knees while they both worked in finishing the task of tying her up.

When they finally stepped back to admire the work they’d successfully done, Y/n deflated. Tears soaking into her bed in which she rested on top of. Her lungs still burned, having never stopped. The hogtied position she had been forced into leaving her nothing to work with in terms of escaping. Not that she could think clearly anyway. The distress she was under proved too much.

“Oh, Shh Sh Sh… There, there, sweet thing. Settle down for us now. We aren’t going to kill you.” Cooed, who she could only guess right now was Gojo.

Geto reached forward from his position of kneeling on the bed, gentle soothing pets stroking her hair. Her sobbing tapering off into hiccupped breathing even while flinching with every touch. “There you go, good girl. See that wasn’t so hard now, was it?”

He pulled away from her, stepping down off the bed and heading towards the previously discarded bag on the floor Y/n hadn’t noticed before..

Y/n slowly turned her head round, no longer pressed into her sheets. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, swollen from all the crying she’d been doing. Little hiccups and groans left her while her lungs tried to recover. She’d given up struggling right now, it had done nothing but cause her pain as the rope dug and squeezed the skin of her wrists and ankles. 

Gojo piped up from behind her, only now feeling the heat from his legs pressing into hers causing her to flinch. “You know, this would’ve gone a whole lot easier if you had just let us in sweetheart.” She could practically hear the smug smile in his voice. “Look at where you are now, tied up all pretty for us. Ripe for the taking.” He pressed closer to her at that, voice practically dripping with need. 

She whined in fear and started squirming at his words. Panic flooding her senses again for just a second before a sharp tug to her hair had her yelping, halting her movements.

“I thought I told you to quit that.” Geto was back to kneeling on the bed in front of her, his hand gripping tight onto her hair, eyes narrowed. 

Her bottom lip trembled, breaths picking up with every second he glared down at her. 

“Don’t be so mean, Sugu.” Gojo said, a teasing lilt in his voice. 

Geto glanced back at him before humming and letting go of his harsh grip, her scalp burning in turn. “I suppose you’re right. She’ll have plenty of time to learn when we take her back home.”

Gojo hummed and she felt him leaning away from her, hearing him crouch down and fiddle with something from the bag as well. 

“Back home?..” She stuttered, voice hoarse and throat dry.

Geto looked back down at her, amusement painting his face. “Yes. Home.”

“Where..” She started, face formed in a twist of concern and confusion. “Please.. I.. Just let me go. I won’t- I won’t tell anyone, I’ll- I’ll leave you alone, I’ll do anything, please..” She gasped out, tears gathered freshly in her eyes again, voice cracking every few seconds. 

An amused eyebrow raised with the hint of a smirk at the corner of his mouth was all she got as a response. 

Gojo had come back, reaching round and fastening a strip of duct tape around her mouth in a sudden flurry of movement. Giving her no time to process what he had done until after he had done it. 

She cried out, the sound muffled thanks to the tape, worried eyes darting around in panic as she tried squirming again for the third time. 

Gojo pressed up behind her once again. “You’re not going anywhere, sweet pea! You’re ours now. We’ve had you picked out for a long time now.” The joy in his voice didn’t fail to put her on edge, his words doing their part in helping the tears gathered in her waterline to finally spill down her cheeks. Wetting the tape situated over her lips.

“He’s right.” Geto replied. Bringing one of his hands up to show what he had collected from the bag a few moments ago. The mobile phone in his hands glowed brightly in the dark room, the lamp from before having been moved, the light now dim.

“We’ll bring you back with us soon enough, but we still have a few more hours to kill before that. And why waste them.” Gojo said, the grin in his voice unsettling her, keeping her frozen in fear.

An easy smile pulled at Geto’s cheeks at that, head tilting to the side to gaze down at their pretty prey. 

“Well what are you waiting for then, Satoru?”

A pause. Smile pulling into a predatory grin.

“Have at it.”

#geto x reader #gojo x reader #geto suguru #gojo saturo #jujutsu kaisen x reader #yandere geto #yandere geto suguru #yandere gojo #yandere gojo satoru #yandere gojo x reader #yandere geto x reader

[toomuchracket]

birthday wish (d word matty x reader fluff)

it's the 6th for me already so here's the first of the matty35 birthday celebration fics, as organised by lovely @the1975attheirverybest and @abiiors!! pre-dating, very sweet, hope you enjoy <3

“for fuck's sake, matty, will you just fucking ask her?”

george is all but bashing his head off the desk in the office he and matty have unofficially claimed as their own, while the latter paces across the carpet, biting at the skin around his nails. “dunno, george. what if she says no?”

“wouldn't be the first time a hot girl's told you to do one, would it?”

“fuck off,” matty smacks his friend on the back of the head. objectively, he knows george is right - you are hot, that's merely a fact, you're gorgeous - but that doesn't mean he has to like hearing him bring it up.

whatever. it's not like matty can get mardy at him for it - he isn't your boyfriend, after all. technically, you're barely even friends; he's known you all of four weeks, and has yet to see you in a social setting. 

he really fucking wants to, though. hence, his current dilemma.

george laughs. “mate, you're only asking her to come over to mine for your birthday drinks. it's not like you're asking her out or anything.”

“no,” matty hums, eyes unfocusing on their view out the window as his brain conjures up thoughts of doing just that. it's a nice thought, admittedly not an unfamiliar one, and something he will absolutely get distracted imagining if he doesn't snap out of it now. he blinks. “i just think it'd be nice if she was there, y'know? but, at the same time, i don't want her to feel weird about me asking, cos she doesn't know us that well yet.”

“i think you're overthinking it,” comes the salient reply. “can sort-of see where you're coming from, but i reckon if you just fucking ask her like a normal person then it'll be fine.”

matty sighs. “alright. you're right. i'll ask her before the end of the day.”

“well,” george turns to him, shit-eating grin on his face. he nods towards the glass panel on the door. “she's heading towards us, so you're doing it now.”

fuck. matty peers through the window, heart softening as he watches you wander towards him - sorry, them - stack of papers in hand and your hair escaping the messy ponytail he watched you shove it into earlier. “perfect.”

he barely has time to force the panic from his face before you're knocking softly on the half-open door, poking your head around it with a sweet smile. “hi, boys. am i okay to come in with some admin? i can come back later if you're busy.”

matty opens his mouth to speak, but george beats him to it. “oh, we're not busy at all. matty was just doing my fucking head in, as per,” he laughs when matty scowls at him. “what d'you need?”

“just got some risk assessments for album events that i need you to read and sign. the fun stuff,” you awkwardly (endearingly, matty would say) put the papers on the desk, looking up at matty as you step back and shyly clasp your hands behind your back. god, you are so fucking cute. “and, for the record, i doubt what george just said about you is true, matty.”

“thank you, darling,” matty smiles, at the exact same time as george says “no, he genuinely was being a pain in the arse”; he turns to his best friend, glaring. “what, george, like you're being to me now?”

george winks at you. “worse.”

you giggle nervously, turning towards the door - matty's heart drops as you do. “well, don't let me get in the way. just get those back to me as soon as you can, please, alright?”

“wait, before you go,” george calls after you. “can we talk to you about something?”

“um, yeah?” you turn back around, pretty face panicked, and nervously cross one arm over your stomach to hold the other. “am i in trouble?”

fuck, you are so adorable. matty smiles as softly as possible - not difficult, though, when it’s you he’s smiling at. “no, no, of course not. what would you even be in trouble for, anyway? you’re perfect.”

“oh,” you smile bashfully. “thank you.”

“it’s true. anyway,” matty clears his suddenly-very-dry throat as best he can. “we were wondering… are you, um, busy on saturday?”

“the 9th?” your brow furrows as you think. “yeah, i am, actually - my friend’s moving in with his boyfriend, and i said i’d help,” the panicked expression crosses your face again. “why do you ask? is there something else on that day that i should be at?”

crestfallen, matty replies with a “no, it’s alright, not a big deal”; george cuts him off, though. “it’s not a work thing, no - we were just gonna ask if you wanted to come to the little birthday celebration we’re having for matty at mine that day-”

“but really, if you can’t make it, no hard feelings,” matty interjects, practically tripping over his words in his haste to reassure you (read: seem cool about it, and not let on that he’s disappointed). “we know it’s short notice.”

you blink a few times, biting your lip before you look directly at matty and speak. “what time would you want me?”

well, anytime, all the time, really. “oh. just after 4? it’s quite casual, not a sit-down dinner or anything. but, like i said, no pressure.”

“no, i think i could probably be there for that time!” you nod enthusiastically. “i’ll text you if anything changes, but,” you beam, and matty thinks his heart might pack in. “i’ll do my best to be there. thanks for asking, both of you.”

“of course,” george grins. “you’re our friend. why wouldn’t we ask you?”

he isn’t technically wrong, calling you that on behalf of both of them, but it still makes matty feel like he’s bitten into a lemon. a friend; how he wishes there was another word prefixing it, one only he could use to describe you.

still, you’ll hopefully be there to celebrate his birthday with him, and that sweetens everything - if you turn up, that is. “exactly. you’re top of the guestlist, darling.”

you huff out a laugh, looking at matty so affectionately he could cry. “better make a proper effort to get to the party, then,” you look at your watch. “i’m sorry, i’ve got to run to a meeting - hopefully see you at the weekend?”

“yeah,” matty nods. you’re out of the office before he can finish speaking, and his parting phrase comes out feebly as a result. “bye, darling.”

he moves to sit back at his desk, lifting one of the risk assessments and beginning to read it in silence. george peers round his laptop, gawking at his best friend. “why you being all emo?”

“i’m not.”

“yeah, you are. you’re like a black cloud,” a beat passes, then george speaks again, voice softer. “the invitation went well, at least.”

matty hums noncommittally. “s’pose.” 

“it did, matthew. she was excited. she said she’d try her best to be there. those are good things.”

“i know,” matty sighs. “i just… i hope she’ll be there. be a shame if she wasn’t.”

“i think she will.”

“well, we’ll see.”

***

“... happy birthday, dear matty, happy birthday to you!”

matty smiles at the mismatched chorus of voices, laughing when charli ruffles his hair after she sets the cake down on the coffee table in front of him. “oi, bean,” he lightly taps eilidh, sat on his lap, on the shoulder. “i know we’re a bit early to be celebrating your birthday, but will you help me blow out the candles?”

she nods excitedly, tiny ponytail bouncing. matty beams, and they gently blow out a “3” candle each, to a soundtrack of applause. ross, sat next to the two of them, reaches over to smooth his daughter’s hair. “have the cigarettes finally caught up to you, or are you just getting too old?”

matty furrows his brow. “d’you mean?”

“well, you just needed my toddler’s help to blow out your candles - stop it, i’m joking,” his friend laughs, leaning to the side to avoid matty smacking the back of his head. “did you make a wish?”

“obviously.”

“what for?”

“can’t tell you,” matty takes a sip of his wine, lifting it out of eilidh’s reach - ross lifts her onto his own lap, and she cuddles into him quite cutely. “won’t come true, otherwise.”

“fair enough,” ross shrugs. he nods to something behind matty. “g’s trying to get your attention, mate.”

“is he?” matty turns, heart rate increasing when he hears george saying your name into the phone pressed to his ear. after excusing himself from the table, he quickly follows his friend into the quiet hallway, tensing every muscle in his body to stop his leg bouncing in nervous anticipation.

the nerves fade quickly, though - george smiles as he talks, and then he says something that makes matty want to actually skip around the house. “you’re almost here? amazing, everyone’s looking forward to seeing you…”

understatement of the fucking century.

“... and yeah, i’ll make sure someone’s outside so you know where to go,” he laughs down the line, and matty’s heart melts at the thought of you endearingly asking for that. “alright, no worries. see you soon,” george ends the call, sighing dramatically before smirking at the birthday boy. “told you she’d be here.”

“yeah, yeah,” matty rolls his eyes, but he can’t keep his cheeks from lifting into a smile, no matter how hard he tries. although, to be fair, he’s not trying particularly hard. “i’ll wait for her, mate.”

“you sure? it’s your party, after all.”

“exactly - i should be there to greet the guests,” matty smirks. “and i fancy a cig, too, if i’m honest.”

george scoffs. “typical. here,” he chucks a set of house keys at matty, who manages to catch them with the very tips of his fingers. “you’d better head out now.”

“sweet.”

it’s actually a little bit chilly when matty steps outside george’s front door, but it’s a nice evening; the sun is just beginning to set, casting a golden hue over london, the birds are chirping quietly, and the whole thing is just really quite peaceful. he perches as well as he can on the front gate, lighting up a cigarette and contentedly taking a drag. by the time your uber arrives, he’s halfway finished the cig, but he barely has time to even think about stubbing it out before you’re out of the car and walking towards him. 

he waves, eyes trailing slowly up your body, lingering on your bare legs and almost popping out of his head when they take notice of the slight cleavage your sundress is showing off. not that it’s obscene, or anything, he’s just so used to seeing you all office-chic and buttoned-up. still, matty quickly shifts his focus to that beautiful face of yours, just to keep his cool.

as if he could, around you.

you beam as you near him. “hi! i’m so, so sorry i’m late,” you open your arms for a hug, and he slots into them eagerly, savouring the rose of your perfume. “had to marinate in the shower for a bit after today, i stunk.”

“well, you smell good now. and you look it, too, i love that dress,” matty replies, heart breaking ever so slightly when you pull apart. “and you’re here, that’s all that matters.”

“thanks! and i wouldn’t have missed your birthday, matty - speaking of, here,” you pull a bottle of red from your bag and hand it to him. “didn’t know what to get you, so i figured this was a safe bet.”

“you didn’t have to get me anything! thanks, though, darling,” he looks at the label, eyes widening. “shit, this is good. shall we go inside and open it?”

“oh, if you like,” you smile. “or you can save it for someone special, i'm cool either way.”

matty shrugs, smiling. “i mean, i'm looking at such a person right now.”

it's maybe a tiny bit far a statement for a platonic relationship, but you don't take it badly at all - you just smile back, quietly agree to share the wine, and follow matty when he leads you back into the house and straight into the empty kitchen.

you gasp when you see the birthday cake on the counter. “no! i missed the cake?”

“only by a few minutes,” matty stops rummaging in a drawer for the corkscrew to look round at you; his heart jolts when he sees you look genuinely sad. “really, darling, it's not a big deal.”

“i still feel bad, though. i really am sorry for not being here on time, matty.”

“hey, none of that, please,” he hands you a glass of wine and puts his arm around your shoulders, biting back a beam as you automatically melt into him. “like i said, you're here now, and that's the main thing. and it's my birthday party, so you have to listen to me.”

“alright,” you look up at him, smiling, and hold out your glass. “happy birthday, sweetheart.”

he smiles warmly at the pet name, heart aglow, and taps his glass lightly on your own. “thank you, darling. d'you think we should cut the cake?”

jesus, what a spiral that phrase could lead him into. thank god you're not wearing white today.

you nod. “where does george keep plates? i'll get them.”

“cupboard above the kettle.”

plates and knife procured, matty carefully slices into the cake, oohing and ahhing at the interior. “wow. look at the layers! they're so neat.”

“alright, paul hollywood.”

he giggles. “i love bake off.”

“so do i - oh, thank you,” you take the plate from him, and then a bite of the cake. “fuck me, that's good.”

he laughs, pushing himself to sit on the counter and taking a bite of his own slice. “christ, you were not kidding. fucking amazing.”

“isn't it?” you wash your bite down with some wine. “m'still sorry i didn't get to see you blowing out the candles, though.”

“eilidh helped me.”

you aww, perching yourself on the counter next to him. “i take it you made a wish?”

“of course.”

“good,” you rest your head on his shoulder, so casually intimate that matty thinks his legs would give way if he tried to stand right now. “d'you think it'll come true?”

he rests his head atop yours, smiling when you giggle at him. “you know what? i think it already has.”

#mads muses #mads does writing #matty35 #d word matty #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy fanfic #matty healy fic #matty healy fluff #matty healy x reader #matty x reader

[alvojake]

idek what I was doin here, but enjoy this drabble that I may or may not finish... (I wrote it at like 3am with a major migraine, so I apologize if it's trash ☠️☠️) this also is probably only going to be lightly edited bc my brain hates me, and I feel like I'm about to pass out from tunnel vision

full fic here!!

paring: bf!heeseung x afab!reader genre: angst w/ fluff??? warning: cussing, mental health issues (overthinking), heeseung forgetting y'alls anniversary, lmk if I need to add anything! wc: 1.3k

The rain had started right before you walked up to their front door, drenching you from head to toe seeing as you had no way of protecting yourself. The raindrops covered the tear streaks that had stained your cheeks from the tears that had fallen moments ago. Lighting cracked in the back, muffling the sound of your sobs. 

You wanted to knock on the door, you knew that they wouldn’t care, they never did. Hell Jay would probably give you an earful, but you wished you were here on more happy terms. You wished you didn’t have to track down your boyfriend only to find him at his friend's house. He never responded to any of your texts and all of your calls would ring until eventually going to voicemail. It was tearing you apart because you didn’t know what you did wrong, why he would forget such an important day and ignore you on top of it all.

You raised your hand to knock, but there was a hesitation in your movements. You were scared, scared of the rejection, scared of the confrontation, scared to see Heeseung mad at you. There was a little voice in your head that was telling you to just forget about it and that you were sure he just hadn’t seen the date. Telling you to forgive him to keep from arguing because arguments normally led to yelling and you hated yelling.

Just as you were about to turn and walk away from the house, the door swung open. Jake was taken aback seeing you standing there, eyes wide as you looked up at him. He was just as shocked as you were, if not more, because why hadn’t you knocked yet? And why were you just standing in the rain?

“Y/n, what the hell are you doing?” He finally spoke, causing you to jump at the tone of his voice. Was he mad? Did you really do something to cause Heeseung to come running to his friends? You tried to rack your brain for anything that could have happened, but the more you dug, the more it started to hurt your head.

Before you could dwell any further, you felt your body being pulled before you could even register it. You were standing at the entrance of Jake and Jay’s house. Your body shivered at the sudden temperature change, a sneeze threatening to break through.

“Stay here. I’m going to get a towel.” Jake’s voice was softer this time, causing your brows to scrunch together.

Jake could clearly see that something was wrong. You were never this quiet, never so out of it as you were. He was shocked to see you standing on the porch, drenched in water as if you had been standing there for a while. Heeseung had said that you were going to stay home because you had a test you wanted to study for, so why were you here now? 

The questions continued to eat at his brain as he walked down the hall, stopping at the entrance of the game room, where they were all huddled.

“Hee, your girl is here,” he said, jabbing a thumb over his shoulder. The silver-haired male looked at Jake, confused. You hadn’t told him you were coming; in fact, he hadn’t heard from you all day. That’s what he thought, at least until he reached for his phone, only to realize that it wasn’t on him.

“Fuck.” He cursed under his breath as he stood from his seat, meeting Jake at the door as he was walking back with a towel which only confused the male further. Jake rolled his eyes before shoving the towel into Heeseung’s chest, annoyance pooling in his eyes.

“She’s drenched, and I'm pretty sure she’s been standing out in the rain.” Jake’s words sent a wave of panic through Heeseung’s body. Why the hell would you just stand in the rain? Or even forget your umbrella?

Grabbing the towel, he walked past Jake towards the front door. As soon as he laid his eyes on you, he knew something was wrong. He, however, pushed that to the side as he wrapped the towel around your body, pulling you close.

“Why the hell were you just standing out there?” Your heart skipped as his voice engulfed you, and your eyes trailed up to meet his.

Heeseung could tell that you had been crying. Your eyes were bloodshot, making the color of your iris stand out. Concern and worry etched themselves into his skin, and his hand came up to cup your face in his palms.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” His voice was softer this time, causing more tears to pull in your eyes, and your bottom lip started to tremble once more.

Heeseung could feel his heart breaking, he hated seeing you like this, wanting nothing more than to make you feel better. He needed to know the source first, though. Needed to know who had hurt his precious baby.

“You’ve been ignoring me.” The way your voice came out so broken and hoarse was enough to completely shatter Heeseung’s heart.

“No, no, baby, I left my phone in the car by accident. I wasn’t ignoring you, I swear.” His reassurance mended your heart a little bit.

Key word: little bit

That still left the underlying issue that he had forgotten about your anniversary. You didn’t wanna speak it into existence in case it started an argument. That was the last thing you wanted right now. Heeseung could tell that there was more than what you were letting on; leaning forward, he pressed a kiss to your forehead, noticing how cold your body was. “Fuck baby, you’re freezing. Come on, I’m sure Jay or Jake have some-”

“It’s our anniversary, Heeseung.” The words tumbled from your lips before you could even stop them. Your hand immediately came up to cover your mouth, and your wide doe eyes looked up at him. Confusion pooled in his eyes; he was sure that it was next week. 

“It’s not until next week, though, beautiful.” He sounded so sure of himself that his eyebrows scrunched together in confusion.

Your breath hitched in your throat, words failing to be spoken, but your eyes did all the talking for you. Heeseung cursed under his breath before pressing a soft kiss on your forehead once more, then making a beeline for the game room. Not even a few seconds later, he was making his way back to you, his jacket in his hand.

You stood still as he pulled the towel off of your body before draping his oversized jacket over your shoulder. His scent instantly fills your senses and brings you some kind of comfort. You weren’t angry; you weren’t even angry, to begin with. No, you were scared. Scared that he knew but just didn’t care. Scared that he had finally grown tired of you. Scared that-

Your thoughts were cut short when Heeseung cupped your face bringing his lips to yours. It was soft, almost a ghost of a kiss, but enough to fill your frigid body with warmth.

“Whatever you’re thinking, stop. Nothing that your brain is telling you is true, baby.” His voice was low enough for only you to hear, and tears brimmed in your eyes once more, your bottom lip pulled between your teeth.

Heeseung knew how easy it was for you to get into your head and start overthinking things. He knew that if he let you continue that you would only start to pick yourself apart, and he’d be damned if he was going to let that happen because of his mistakes.

“Jake, I’m taking your umbrella.” He called down the hall, not even giving the younger boy a chance to protest as he opened the door and ushered him out.

@alvojake | Do not steal, plagiarise, translate, or repost any of my work

𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖈𝖑𝖆𝖎𝖒𝖊𝖗 : ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ɴᴏ ᴡᴀʏ ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʀᴇᴘʀᴇꜱᴇɴᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱ. ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴘᴜʀᴇʟʏ ꜰɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛᴀᴋᴇɴ ꜱᴇʀɪᴏᴜꜱʟʏ.

#alvojake rant #kpop #enha #enhypen #enhypen jake #sim jaeyun #enha x reader #lee heeseung #heeseung #enhypen heeseung #heeseung enhypen #engene #park jongseong #park sunghoon #heeseung fluff #heeseung angst #heeseung x reader #heeseung imagines

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

TAKE CARE OF YOU [7]

Sugar Daddy!Joel Miller x Female!Reader

Overall Warnings: slow burn, angst/comfort, power imbalance, age gap, possessive tendencies, eventual smut, #daddyissues, independent reader learns to let go and relax, emotionally constipated Joel Miller learns to be vulnerable; (more specific warnings to be added to individual chapters if necessary)

Chapter Word Count: 2,800

Summary: You spent your entire adult life supporting yourself and barely getting by. It’s why a life of ease offered to you by a mysterious stranger sounded so foreign and unbelievable. Joel Miller, dressed in flannels that had seen better days, didn’t look like the kind who could promise you the world on a plate, but he seemed desperate to help out. All he asks is that you let him take care of you. That wouldn’t be so hard. Would it?

[a/n: this one is on the shorter side, but I didn't want to leave y'all with nothing (ironically I wrote this while on a plane to my conference/vacation). The Las Vegas trip will all be one large chapter (someone asked if I was gonna split that into parts, but I won't). Part 8 will just be viva las vegas the entire time, baby.]

07: BEING VULNERABLE SUCKS ASS

"i don't have an explanation as to how you pull me in, you just do. you've always had a gravity that i've never been able to overcome." -JmStorm

The cost of a mani-pedi never seemed worth it to you in the past. You saved your money for other more necessary things like bills and groceries. Sitting in the padded chair with your feet resting in the heated water of the foot bath, you realized how much you had been missing out on. 

“I can’t believe that bitch showed up where you work.” Nima scoffed. She sat in the chair beside you with her feet in her own bath. You had used Joel’s money to pay for her to get a mani-pedi as well and that made you happier than the treatment itself. Over the years, Nima would pay for meals and drinks and times the two of you went out and she always did it nonchalantly and in a way that never felt like charity. It felt good to be able to buy her something for once. “How did she even find you?”

You shrugged, “No idea. Sugar baby grapevine?”

“Bitches do be talking.” Nima hummed. You chuckled and leaned back in your seat. This spa offered mimosas and you held your empty flute. Nima picked up her phone to shoot off a message before turning to look at you. “So? Viva las Vegas, baby. You excited?”

“Yeah,” You nodded once then tilted your head with a slight wince, “Well, I mean, I’m kind of nervous too. This is my first time going away with him. He’s stuck with me for a full 72 hours.” Once you started talking you found all your bottled worries spilling out. “What if he thinks I’m annoying and gets tired of me? I’m too scared to ask him if we’re staying in the same room or a different room because I don’t know what I want the answer to be. If he says no then I’ll be disappointed and worry that he is getting sick of me, but if he says yes then I’ll panic⏤ Is he not the man I thought he was and he’s expecting something from me? Or what if it is innocent and he got me a second bed, but then he hears me snore and thinks it’s gross?” You paused to catch your breath and realized Nima was just blankly staring at you with a raised eyebrow. “What?”

Nima shook her head. “Nothing.” She looked past you and raised a hand to catch the attention of an employee. “Hi! Yes, we need more alcohol please. As soon as possible.” You groaned and hung your head. Nima let out a low whistle. “Is that what your brain sounds like all the time? Jesus, babe.”

“I know I’m overthinking.” You admitted. A woman came by with a champagne bottle and you thanked her after she filled your glass⏤ turning down the juice she offered with it. You took a long sip. “I like him.” Nima’s eyes widened. “Yeah, yeah, you were right, okay? I… I like him. A lot.” A hand drifted up to hold the sunflower charm on your new necklace between your fingers. Tomorrow morning you’d be boarding a private jet with Joel and you’d be spending the weekend with a guy you were seriously crushing on. “I know it’s so stupid to start falling for a guy who is literally paying me to hang around him…”

Nima sighed, “Oh, babe.”

“This is the first time I’ve felt like this since… since Nathan.” You said. At the mention of you ex-boyfriend’s name, Nima’s eyebrows furrowed in pain. You didn’t often mention him, hardly said his name, and it was in part because just the thought of him hurt. Whether he meant to or not, Nathan made you feel like you had not been enough. Joel made you feel worthy. You hadn’t even realized that the hole Nathan left in your heart had been so deep until Joel began to fill it with care. “Maybe I shouldn’t go…”

Nima reached out and grasped your wrist. “No. You have to.”

“You told me liking him was a bad idea.”

“I know, but…” Nima shrugged. “You seem happier these days. Relaxed. I can’t tell you if this is going to end well or not, I have no idea, but… even if this is just some kind of emotional rebound, I think it’s good for you.” You gave her a small smile and Nima squeezed your wrist. “Nathan was a tool. You deserve to be happy. Even if happy comes in the form of a cowboy sugar daddy.”

You chuckled at her phrasing. Joel did make you happy. The negative, anxiety riddled part of your brain screamed that being a sugar baby was hardly the same thing as being loved. However, for the first time in your life you were choosing to ignore the logistics of the scenario and just focus on how you felt. 

“I keep telling myself to just be like you.” You admitted and Nima’s eyes widened. You chuckled and shrugged. “You’re never scared, Nima, and I feel… I feel like I’m always scared. You just explore love, guns a’blazing, and I wish⏤ I wish I could do that.”

Nima turned so fast in her seat that water sloshed out of the foot bath. She frowned, “Are you kidding me?? Of course, I’m scared! Loving someone, opening up yourself to be loved, is the scariest thing anyone could ever do.” Her lips pressed together and she reached out so both her hands held tight to yours. “So, don’t stress yourself out over it. How you feel is totally normal. Being vulnerable sucks ass.”

You shot her a firm smile as a few employees came over to discuss any specific nail styles you may want. Worrying about it too much would only ruin the trip. You had already come this far⏤ may as well keep jumping in head first.

It had been ages since you’ve flown, literal years, and never had it been in a private jet. Standing on the tarmac watching part of the flight crew roll your bags to be loaded, you just stared. Eventually, a large hand settled in the middle of your back. Joel saddled up beside you and he offered you a small smile.

“You gonna board or just stare at it all day, darlin?” He chuckled. He wore one of his suits, but he had already stripped of his coat. 

You nodded, “Yeah, sorry, I just can’t believe I’m about to board a private jet.” Without preamble or question, Joel’s hand slipped from your back to slide down your arm and tangle his fingers with yours. It was almost a habit now for Joel to take your hand. He led you toward the jet. “Do you always ride in style like this?”

“Not always.” Joel replied. “But I will say that ridin’ like this has spoiled me of public airlines.”

“No kidding.” You chuckled and Joel motioned for you to walk up the stairs to the jet’s door first. He followed only a step behind, hand not leaving yours. The inside of the jet was simple but luxurious. Couches rather than single seats and one side had a booth like table. “I can’t imagine going from this to Spirit airlines.”

Joel snorted behind you and stepped around you so he could lead you toward one of the couches. “If you think I’m ever gonna let you fly Spirit, sugar, you’re crazy.”

You sat down and your eyebrows lifted when Joel walked toward the back rather than sit beside you. He briefly disappeared from sight, it sounded like he was speaking to an attendant, and you took that time to gaze around the plush interior of the jet. This was your life for now. It felt like a dream.

Joel walked back and he had two champagne flutes. Your lips pulled up into a grin as he settled right beside you and offered you a flute. “For the pretty lady.”

“Why thank you.” You chuckled. The two of you lightly clinked your glasses together before sipping at it. Despite the jet having, ample space, Joel sat close enough to drape his arm over the back of the couch behind you. “How long is this flight?”

“A little over an hour or so.”

“Oh, that’s not bad.” You hummed. “Is anyone else flying with us?”

Joel shook his head. “Tess is gonna meet us there on day two, and Tommy never comes to the Vegas conference.”

“Why?” You asked then paused. “To both situations.”

Joel chuckled. “Day one is kind of pointless for us to be there. All the work and meetings my company is involved in starts day two.”

You raised an eyebrow, “Then how come we’re going for day one?”

Joel shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. “I figured it’d be fun to sight see together? If you’re interested that is.” You always loved watching him grow slightly nervous when asking you something like that because the smile he shot you after you inevitably said yes was damn near radiant. You nodded in excitement and Joel’s eyes lit up in response. “Good, and as for Tommy,” Joel gave a little shrug, “He’s got a history of gettin' involved in shit he shouldn’t. He’s got his head straight on now, mostly, but it’s just safer if keeps away from the temptation altogether.”

The pilot poked his head in to let you both know he was ready and suggest you strap in. You glanced around to see if there was a place you could set your flute down but the closest table was on Joel’s side. He set his own flute down briefly and reached out. You thought he’d take the flute, but instead Joel reached down to click your seat belt around your waist. It was such a simple motion yet you felt a warmth fill your cheeks.

“Thanks.” You mumbled. The plane taxied out to the runway and you quietly sipped at your champagne. You felt a rumbling underfoot as the plane picked up speed and when it began to rise your stomach lurched. Startled, your hand shot out to steady yourself on the closest object which just so happened to be Joel’s thigh. 

Before you could even fully comprehend how awkward this could be, your hand squeezed as the plane continued to rise— your only focus on the sensation of taking off. As the plane leveled off, you were able to feel other aspects around you, such as how thick and firm Joel’s thigh felt under hand.

He cleared his throat and peeled your hand off his thigh. Embarrassment flooded your soul, but Joel kept your hand in his. He laced his fingers between yours, shifting closer so his thigh was pressed against yours, and lifted your hand to his lips to set a soft kiss at the back of your hand.

“Are you alright, sugar?” Joel asked with nothing but concern.

“Sorry.” You shook your head. “It’s been a while since…”

“Don’t apologize. I should’ve asked if you were a nervous flyer.”

“I didn’t think I was.” You chuckled and swallowed the lump in your throat as the plane hit a patch of turbulence and wavered. Joel continued to trace circles against the back of your hand with his thumb and you focused on that alone. Somehow, his presence alone was enough to soothe your frayed nerves. You leaned your head against his shoulder and Joel shifted so you’d be able to rest in a comfortable spot. You really did like this way too much. 

Joel hummed, “Lemme know if you feel sick. We got a first aid kit on here somewhere with some motion sickness patches, I think.”

“I’m okay.” You replied, loathing the idea of him getting up or anything right now, “Where are we staying in Vegas?”

“The Wynn.” 

“Is that where you usually stay?”

“No, actually.” Joel said. “I usually stay at Mandalay Bay, but I thought you’d like the Wynn better.”

You were glad you were resting your head on his shoulder so he couldn’t see the absolute stupid smile that crossed your features. He had changed his usual routine and picked a hotel that specifically made him think of you⏤ one he thought you’d enjoy best. Maybe the bar was just on the floor from your last boyfriend, but it was no wonder you were falling for Joel Miller when he did such sweet, considerate things. 

“Why?” You asked.

“It’s real pretty. You’ll see.”

The two of you continued to chat idly and you listened to Joel tell stories about past conferences and the things he was looking forward to and wasn’t. Your stomach had mostly settled now that the plane was smoothly soaring at its cruising altitude. So, you figured now was as good a time as any to use the restroom. You excused yourself and cautiously walked to the lavatory. As you finished up and washed your hands, your eyes glanced up in the mirror at yourself. You may as well have been glowing. For the millionth time, you thanked your lucky stars that Joel had somehow found you.

At the thought, you paused. This entire time you wondered how Rosalind randomly found you at work, but what were the chances that Joel Miller would randomly walk into a failing bakery and see you behind the counter? You shut off the water, dried your hands, and walked back out. Joel was using the plane phone when he spotted you.

“Yeah, we’ll see you when you get here.” Joel stared at you as he spoke, his gaze soft. “Just call me if you need anythin’. Mhmm. Right. Bye, Tess.” He hung up and set the phone aside. “All good, sugar?”

“Can I ask you something?” 

“Course.” Joel nodded and you settled back in your seat beside him. 

You didn’t lay your head on his shoulder and turned just enough so you could face him while the two of you spoke, “How did you find me?” Joel raised an eyebrow in confusion. “At the bakery. Were you just passing by and saw me through the window? Or were you coming in for baked goods randomly?”

Joel suddenly looked sheepish. He cleared his throat, “It’s… Alright, this might not sound too good or flatterin’ toward myself.” You furrowed your own brows in confusion this time. “That week I was at a work site a few blocks down from the bakery. I had stepped off site to take a call and… and I saw you.” Joel rubbed the back of his neck, but he didn’t break his gaze. “I recognized you from the coffee shop, figured you were going to work, and I… I followed you.” Joel closed his eyes and shook his head at the admission. “Jesus Christ, you must think I’m the biggest creep. I swear I didn’t mean to. It was like… I was movin’ before I even knew it. I nearly followed you right into the bakery, but I stopped and came to my senses.” He reopened his eyes and there was regret and shame in his brown eyes⏤ two emotions you didn’t like seeing there. “I’m so sorry, darlin’. I know it was stupid and I tried to stay away, but I… I couldn’t get you out of my head. I broke down a few days later and came in. Told myself I was just gonna pay you back for the coffee and be done with it, but once I got to talkin’ to you…”

“It’s okay, Joel.” You said softly.

“No, it really isn’t.” He shook his head. There was a firmness in his words that echoed the shame he felt. “I should’ve told you much sooner than this and definitely not on a plane 40,000 feet in the air where you can’t even run from me.”

“I’m not gonna run.” You chuckled. Maybe you should be more concerned than you were, but Joel had been nothing but respectful the entire time you had known him. Besides, the only thing you could grasp from his words was the fact that it seemed Joel felt drawn to you the same way you felt toward him. It could just be naive optimism or a delusion, but you began to wonder if it were possible that Joel liked you as much as you liked him⏤ as more than just the sugar daddy and sugar baby ties between the two of you.

You turned in your seat to lay on his shoulder once more. Joel seemed mildly startled by the motion, but he was quick to wrap his arm around your shoulders to hold you in place. You reached up to play with his hand. “Thank you for telling me the truth.”

Joel chuckled, “I’m never gonna lie to you, sugar.”

The pilot came over the intercom to announce he’d be starting the landing process soon and you wondered if Vegas was going to be the start of a new chapter of your relationship with Joel.

taglist (closed):

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✨J.M. Masterlist✨

#the last of us #tlou #tlou fanfiction #joel miller #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #sugar daddy!joel miller #female reader #reader insert

[pix3lplays]

Hi, I've been seeing your posts and reqs I love your writing it's like therapy 💕 but I am so scared to make a req 😭I was wondering can you do a Jing Yuan and Pregnant reader? like the reader waking up in the middle of the night because they had a craving but doesn't want to disturb Jing Yuan and then Jing Yuan panics because he doesn't see the reader beside him he eventually finds the reader and Yanqing together eating, would he panic and overthink reader ran away or got kidnapped? (I am so sorry if this is so long please ignore this author🥰 If you're not willing to write this have a good day✨🥰)

Like therapy oh my gosh thank you, I really appreciate that! I will gladly do this prompt!

Tw! Pregnancy

-Pregnant!reader x Jing Yuan-

You were craving a sandwich like you would not Believe. Jing Yuan was asleep, gently snoring by your side…no point waking him right? You knew he had to get up early for work…You’d just slip out of bed for a second, make a sandwich, and then come back to bed. No problems right? You slip out of bed, waddle to the kitchen, where to your surprise, a certain Lieutenant had the same idea. (Does Yanqing live in the same house as you guys? Yeah sure he’s your son after all.)

“Huh,” you both say to each other at the exact same time.

Jing Yuan wakes up to an empty bed. Usually he wasn’t a paranoid man, but his position as General meant he had powerful enemies…and now…his pregnant lover was missing and he was hearing sounds from the kitchen. Combined with the sleepiness from his brain, the General was left suspecting something terrible had happened to you, and that the perpetrator was currently in the kitchen. He grabs his Guan Dao from under the bed (kept there for scenarios like this one) and carefully sneaks into the kitchen, his Guan Dao crackling with lightning. “What are you doing?” he hears a familiar voice in the darkness, and when he switches on the light switch, he breathes a sigh of relief at the sight. You, perfectly fine, making sandwiches with Yanqing. “Little late for a midnight snack…” he says with a smile, lowering my the Guan Dao, the lighting dissipating from the blade. “We were hungry,” you say through a mouth full of sandwich. Yanqing nods in agreement. The General sighs, and turns back around. “Come back to bed when you’re finished here,” he says. “You need your sleep.” “Okay!” you chirp, like you didn’t just give the General the biggest scare of his life.

#Pregnancy #honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #jing yuan x reader #jing yuan #hsr jing yuan x reader #honkai star rail jing yuan x reader

[buckyarchives]

Metal arms and short skirts | Bucky Barnes. {4.}

summary: waltzing in as the new head of the Avenger's medical division, impressing everyone, and... scaring Bucky with your incredibly short skirts. while Bucky's having a hard time looking at his arm as anything other than a deadly weapon, and you're more than happy to help him.

word count: 7.4k

author note: the way this chapter originally was 11k words… i had to cut it down a little and also kinda end it mid chapter and pick up next update? so it may seem like it ends weird? idk. also unfortunately Vivienne Westwood’s death was recently so i thought of to use her dress in the chapter to honor her :) enjoy reading. not beta’d (please i needs a beta reader) important! opening my inbox for drabble request since this series is coming to an end soon

warning: bucky’s self loathing (like usual tbh.), people being mean to bucky (making remarks about his trauma, specifically brain damage), creepy and annoying men.

outfit reference here

read on AO3 | masterlist

Bucky is convinced his life is just one sick joke, and whoever finds this funny— deserves death. his legs bounced wildly, eyes frantically checking the watch on his wrist. it was Steve’s, very expensive, not Bucky's type. the ticking was starting to annoy him, bucky wanted to smash it, then he wouldn't know how late you are.

the navy blue suit, Steve gave him that too, said it brings out his eyes. god- bucky was practically sweating through it, the night hasn’t started yet and he feels like he needs to change. he was overthinking, everyone keeps telling him. but there was a plan, 5 pm and after work, the common room down the hall to your lab. maybe it was just nerves, but it still didn’t excuse the impending doom settling in the bottom of bucky's stomach.

“James, it’s been 10 minutes,” Natasha spoke, dressed in a long black dress. she sat on the floor before a couch, wanda held a curling wand in Natasha's hair as she sat above her. bucky had tried to distract himself by watching the curls form, it was quite fascinating if he wasn’t so distant.

“she is probably just fashionably late, it would make sense,” Wanda said— which felt true. but you’ve never once been late because of your appearance before, bucky can't even think of a time you’ve been late for any reason.

frustrated, Bucky abruptly got up and ran a hand through his hair, beginning to pace. “hey! I am not going to reapply all the gel!” Wanda shouts and bucky's flinches, putting both of his hands to his side like a child obeying their mother.

“what if she doesn't want to be seen with me, you know- like, like that? what if after yesterday she changed her mind, oh my god. Nat, I can't do this.” Bucky rattled on. Natasha rolled her eyes to the back of her head.

“Stop with the what if” Natasha groaned, “she is not even that late.”

“Have you even tried to text her?” Wanda mentions.

Bucky stops pacing.

“you haven’t even called her?'' Natasha looks at Bucky like he's stupid, he feels stupid. “do you know who you are? what if something happened to her that would make her late?”

Bucky's face dropped, oh my god, what if something happened? Bucky doesn't feel stupid, he is stupid. he is the fucking winter soldier, and you’ve been out with him, something could totally happen to you. Bucky's breath hitched before he felt like he was choking on it, was this a panic attack? he can’t call you while having a panic attack, but you could be in danger.

Almost instantly, Bucky grabs his phone on the coffee table. his fingers stumble as he looks for your number, but just as his fingers hover over your name. a loud, annoying ring comes from Natasha’s phone. Bucky's head perks up so do all the heads in the room.

Natasha's eyebrows furrow, looking down at her phone. Wanda follows suit as she looks over her shoulder. “it’s Y/N?”

“pick up!” Wanda shouts.

Natasha taps on the phone, “hey, you oka-“

“no!” you shout from the other line, a matching panic in your voice. “no, I am not! I’ve cycled through like 12 dresses and I have like 3 more but I swear, I’m going to go to Versace or Mytheresa— I will fucking call Valentino right now if I have to.”

faintly, everyone heard the sound of fabric rustling, your heels echoing as you paced through your room, and your heavy breathing. panicking about your outfit.

“Hey, hey, y/n calm down.'' Natasha hushed, your faint rattling didn't stop as you continued on talking about some black dress that made you look bloated. “you don’t need to impulse spend 8k on a dress, don’t make a big deal out of this, you’ll look perfect.”

“But Bucky! What if he doesn't like it, or thinks I look fat, or if I'm trying too hard! or too little? ugh!” you groaned, screamed, and rattled. Bucky had half the mind to shout through the phone that he’d think you're perfect however you showed up. but Natasha knew him well and sent a glare that told him not to.

“I just- just, Natasha… I really like him, I don't want to mess this up.” you sighed in defeat. Bucky's heart surged out of his chest, his face felt hot. He just wanted to cradle you close and tell you everything was okay.

“y/n.” Natasha started, her voice stern. “what are you doing right now.”

the other line went silent for a moment. bucky can imagine your thinking face, eyes narrowed, and tugging your lip under your teeth. a sigh escapes your mouth. “I'm on the floor in my closet, trying not to back out or cry.”

“Just don’t back out, okay? I'll be over to help you, sounds good?”

a small sniffle that broke bucky’s heart, “yes.”

“Okay, don’t die of panicking.” Natasha finished, hanging up the phone with a sigh.

Bucky sank down onto the couch, raking his hand through his hair again despite Wanda's protest. letting out a heavy exhale.

you were safe, that’s really what matters. but you were also on the brink of crying, probably tearing through your closet like a mad woman just to appease bucky’s opinions. He felt like a dick.

Natasha sat still, staring at Bucky like she knew more, knew better. Bucky couldn’t read her.

“Are you going?” he said weakly.

“No,” Natasha said plainly, making her way towards Bucky and dragging him to his feet by his suit— before straightening Bucky out. from his suit to his hair, even smoothing the small nervous wrinkles on his forehead.

Natasha always felt like a sister to Bucky in this way. helping him, worrying for him, supporting him, and seemingly reluctantly saving him with Steve couldn't. They shared many painful experiences that brought them close. Natasha was always there for bucky.

“you are.”

“What?!”

Bucky stood dumbfounded, “you’re going to go over there. get her out of her head, pick a dress that makes her look like a fucking goddess, maybe one that matches yours. and make her feel beautiful.”

“I can’t-“

“Shut up, Barnes,” Wanda interjects, the same determination on her face as Natasha's. there was no way he was getting out of this. “go, or I'll make you.”

Bucky watched as Wanda conjured up the red ball of pure power in her hands, an empty threat; they already talked about using her powers for this reason. but enough to scare the shit out of Bucky and make him nod violently. almost to convince himself that he could go.

“go get your girl.” Natasha encouraged.

******

Somewhere between throwing dresses around and banging your head on your walk-in closet walls, you decided that it didn't matter that you weren't mid-age yet, this was a mid-life crisis. Never in your life have you second-guessed your judgment on what to wear, not even in the eyes of the greatest designers the world knows.

But here you sat, verge of tear on your floor. Piles building up around you of dresses, shoes, tights, et cetera, et cetera. You were practically drowning in silk, crepe, and chiffon. Moments ago you really had a dress, it fit perfectly and made your complexion glow, but then the thought of what Bucky would think made you spiral.

Honestly, you knew deep, deep down that he wouldn't care. A day ago he saw you covered in Sam Wilson's blood, so there was really only going up from there. You knew he was a good guy, not one to point out fat rolls on your back or if your stomach was bloated. But the female experience constantly sabotaged those positive thoughts and brought out the ‘what ifs’.

Natasha wasn't much help on the phone. She just spared you from spending your paycheck on another Valentino dress and told you to calm down. She'd be over in a few, you trusted her taste enough, at least you'd have a second opinion. she always looked good, but it was easy for her.

You didn’t think of yourself as an envious person, especially the looks or body category but it was hard in this fragile state of mind to not long for a widows physic.

The loud and echoing noise of your doorbell shook you from your thoughts, you had been spacing out. Throwing on the first piece of fabric you saw on the floor, a large dress shit? Sure, whatever, it was just Natasha. Another loud ring.

“Gimme a moment, Nat!” you shouted, seeing a flash of yourself in a full-sized mirror. you look pathetic, with black tights, a dress shirt, and hair lazily put in a claw. You were already late, how worse could it get?

Spoiler. Much worse. very, very worse.

Opening your front door abruptly, a spew of apologies and worries left your mouth before you could notice the lack of red hair. Eyes wide and mouth gaped, Bucky stood before you. And like the fucking pathetic idiot you are, before Bucky could get a word out, you slammed the door in his face with a high-pitched yelp. A hand flew to cover your mouth, to contain the groans and curse words directed at Natasha. Because of-fucking-course she’d do this.

A wave of guilt and mostly embarrassment washed over you before you could kick yourself more - you opened the door, again.

“I'm so sorry, bucky! I didn't mean to do that– you just surprised me.” the words stumbled over themself, a stuttering mess. You were an udder wreck, this is so embarrassing, you thought. Your voice rose a few octaves, almost certain your makeup had smudged off by now. “Wha- what are you doing here?”

“Nat sent me,” he spoke plainly, standing dumbfounded in your apartment hallway.

“Of course she did.” you cursed and gritted under your breath, words coming out harsher than intended. An unsure face washed over Bucky and he took a tiny step back.

“I can go if you’re uncomfortable.'' Bucky sounded small, it broke your heart.

“No! Please don’t, I'm just freaking out right now– not sure why.” you definitely knew why. Stopping in the middle of your sentence once you notice Bucky's attire. Experiencing whiplash at the sight of the slick, noticeably expensive navy suit he wore. You practically did a double take, blinking like an idiot as you looked him up and down. “Wow! You look great, like really great.”

“And you look…” Bucky's eye trailed up your body, his eyes landing on your face. “Perfect, as always.”

Maybe it was the stress, or nerves, but you were a flustered mess. Complements, embarrassment, running around crying– you shouldn't even try to imagine what you looked like.

“I just threw this on, I…” you noticed the way Bucky began fidgeting and shifting his feet, standing awkwardly with his gaze finding the apartment behind you. “I'm sorry! Come in, come in.”

Moving out of the way for Bucky and letting him in, his eyes travel to every corner, eyes wide in awe. Your apartment was more of the ‘rich, new york snob, with high ceilings and large windows.’ but it was still you and Bucky was taking it in.

Bucky hummed, finishing his look over of the front room and turning back to face you. Fuck, he looked so good, from head to toe, his hair was a little messy and you could see gel residue that made you want to pounce and fix it.

And you were so– a mess.

“I'm sorry for my appearance, I've been panicking and I'm so late, I didn't mean to make you late or worry. Gosh, my makeup is probably messy and–”

Bucky found himself right in front of you, tearing you from your rambling as he grabbed your face. Cradling your jaw in his palms as your eyes met his, wide and frantic. “Doll, stop apologizing, please. You'd done nothing wrong, you look perfect. Everything’s okay.'' Bucky spoke slowly, sure of himself and successfully bringing you back down. You breathed and nodded.

“Now, let me help you get dressed.”

You could kiss him right now if you had a slight nerve. Where did your confidence go all of a sudden?

Bucky must have read your mind, slightly. Pressing a kiss to your crown that made you lean into his hands, worries slowly leaving and almost forgetting about that stupid dress and gala.

Grabbing Bucky's hand with a giddy smile, pulling him into your room slash tornado mess of fabrics. And it showed on Bucky's face, a large huff left his mouth as he stopped in your doorway, eyes exaggeratedly wide..

Maybe it was just growing up in the depression era, and also being just straight-up poor, but the amount of fabric on the floor felt infinite and slightly unnecessary to Bucky. He knew you were a science prodigy and had been paid highly for your research and machines, even more, evident after seeing your place. He's never known luxury and pleasure like this.

“Why do you have so many dresses?”

Shrugging, “fashion is like art to me, and so in some ways, i'm just collecting art. I also have a horrible spending problem, but that's a conversation for another time I think.”

“What are the options?” Bucky asked.

“Uhh,” you stumbled around your room and threw a few dressed around. “Versace, very nice. Christian Dior, is expensive, also nice. Dolce and Gabbana…”

Bucky lazily caught the very expensive dresses you threw around like nothing, peaking into your large walk-in closet. As if your personality summed up into a room, colorful and expensive textiles piled up. Bucky was positive the room was usually clean and organized to the tee. You kept yelling out random French or Italian names Bucky had no knowledge of.

“Okay, slow down. I can speak like twenty-two languages but high fashion is not one of them.” Bucky stopped your rambling, pulling up a long, blood-red gown to your body. “What's wrong with this one, this is pretty.”

You looked at Bucky as if he grew three heads, “way too long, I’d trip over myself all night, and if I’m going with you– red and blue? I know your cap's best friend but come on now, Buck.”

“Okay.” Bucky sighed, picking up a black slim dress. Even imagining you in this one made a pink tint rise to his face. “And this one?”

“Makes me look like a bloated ballon,” you said plainly.

Now Bucky was looking at you like an idiot. “Stop it with that, you’re perfect.”

“Gee thanks, but that doesn't help right now.” you snapped, instantly recoiling at your harsh tone. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

Bucky just smiled, his charming and stupidly sweet smile that makes your knees weak. Wrapping his hands gently around your shoulder and staring intently into your eyes. “Baby, calm down.”

You breathed, tried to at least. The sweet name also made you choke but besides that, Bucky's smooth voice distracted you. “I’m calm.”

“Good.” Bucky nodded, his eyes glancing to the far corner of your closet. A certain light in his eyes showed before his gaze came back to your face. “What about that one?”

Bucky pointed to a certain very special, navy blue dress. Your eyes were wide as you looked between Bucky and the dress. As the silky fabric hung from the hanger, you only took it out of the “vault” to look at it, and didn't even think to try it on. Just wanted to relish in the beauty of it.

“I- no, I can't wear that.” you studdered.

Bucky knew nothing of fashion. What looked good, what was in season, or what was acceptable in the fashion industry. All he knew was the dress looked expensive, matching his and even the thought of you in it made bucky want to fall to his knees. He wasn't leaving this apartment without you in it, to hell any stupid excuse you gave.

“Why not?” he said, stepping carefully over the clothes littered beneath him and picking up the dress. Putting it up to your body, it looked perfect.

“James Buchanan. This was personally gifted to me by Vivienne Westwood. I can’t just wear this.” you shouted.

“I don't know who that is or what that means, put it on.” he shoved the dress in your hands.

“Buck-”

“Please, for me?”

Blinking like an idiot in front of Bucky. You couldn't protest anymore, Bucky was more stubborn than you, and you soon realized he probably wasn’t gonna let you out door without at least seeing it on. You held the dress in your hands, running the fabric under your fingers, huffing dramatically. “Fine, I’ll be in the bathroom, wait here”

Your steps cascaded as you left for the bathroom connected to your room, Bucky awkwardly settled himself on the edge of your bed. Beginning to fidget with the hem of his coat jacket as he waited nervously.

Meanwhile, cursing to yourself in the bathroom as you slipped the dress on it. This dress was gravely special to you, because on your off times and not nose deep in the labs, you'd spent them at fashion events and runways.

Meeting Vivienne was one of the best memories of your life, (next to offering Bucky a new arm) and you'd almost dropped dead when a box decked with the familiar orb logo showed up in front of your door. You had only worn it twice - in your bedroom, too scared and almost feeling unworthy to wear such a thing.

Bucky Barnes sure was special for getting you to go to a stark party with it on.

grunts came from the bathroom as you struggled to slip it on, the zipper reached your middle back and out of reach. Slowly unlocking the door, Bucky's head whipped in your direction. And god, suddenly he couldn't breathe. Even as you clumsily shimmied toward Bucky with your arms awkwardly holding the back up, he thought you looked like the most beautiful girl in the world.

“Buck, can you? The zipper, please?” you turned around and showed the back. Bucky couldn't move for a moment, utterly stunned by your presence. You whispered his name again to catch his attention. Then he stumbled to his feet like a flustered 15-year-old boy. He sure felt like one.

“Yeah. sorry, doll. I got it,” he spoke. You tensed up when Bucky's warm hands touched your bare shoulders. His hands held you like you were glass, slowly zipping the dress up fully. But you didn’t turn around yet, facing him now just felt wrong. You could feel Bucky's breath as his hand trailed across your shoulder blades, Bucky felt goosebumps slowly rise to your skin, and all self-control was gone.

Bucky leaned down and placed a small peck on the crook of your neck, he didn’t even know what he was doing but you practically shuddered under his touch. A chill shot through you and your knees went weak. And then another kiss, and another, and another. His lips slowly made their way up your neck, and one of his hands rested on your waist now.

“You're breathtaking, doll. I’m serious, I've never seen someone so beautiful in my life.” bucky whispered close to your ear, hot breath on your skin that made you ache. His featherlike kisses made you ache, he was so gentle and careful like you’d break under him. You ached for more.

Ever so swiftly, you turned to face bucky. Your hands latched to his neck, “kiss me like you mean it, Barnes.”

In a single instant, bucky’s lips crashed to yours as if his life depended on it, like he couldn't breathe without you. Your back arches into him as he pulled you closer, tongue swiping across his as he let you in. bodies pressed against each other, clinging, aching. More, more, more.

“Bucky…” you wined against his lips, and Bucky quickly pondered if this gala was even worth it. You both were already late, anyways. He hummed sweetly against your lips, your knees hit the edge of your bed and with a surprised yelp, bucky fell atop you on the bed. Kiss unbroken, but you smiled and felt bucky smile into the kiss, following him.

Your hand tangled in his long hair, successfully messing it up farther than it was before. Buckys pulled away just enough to look you in the eye, adoration you found and almost melted. The ends of bucky’s lip quirked up into his infamous dorky smile you only saw on a few special occasions.

“We’re already late…” he whispers so softly.

“Yeah.” you can only mutter out in a daze, falling surrender under bucky’s gaze. Your fingers still tangled in bucky’s brunette hair, getting your nails deep and scratching at his scalp. A quiet pleasured groan escapes his lips. “I messed up your hair.”

Bucky chuckles, “it's okay.”

Tugging your lower lip under your teeth, smiling widely as an idea pops into your head. “Get up, come with me.”

you usher him off you, playfully grabbing at his hands and stumbling over your clothes with bucky following close behind you. leading him into your bathroom and in front of the mirror.

Bucky stood much taller than you, especially without heels. Bucky chuckled as you dragged a small step stool and stepped up behind him. He speaks through a grin, “What are you doing?”

“I messed up your hair, but to be honest– whoever did it added too much gel so I’m going to fix it,” you spoke, grabbing a brush and spray bottle and beginning to spritz his hair in the water. Bucky seemed more than content with your hands raking through his locks.

First parting his hair in half, pulling the top half into a bun, and let the rest fall down. Cocking your head at the sight, he always looked good but not this hairstyle for a gala. Bucky's face crunched up too and you took that as a big no. you just left the hair to fall down naturally, being so used to the regular middle part, you thought to grab the comb and give him a side part.

“What do you think about this?” you asked, brushing the hair out.

Bucky hummed, “Different.”

“Bad or…?”

“No.” bucky smiles, then you realize he's not even looking at himself, his eyes are trained on you. “I like it.”

Leaning down to kiss the top of his head, bucky grew flustered. Jumping down from your stool and kicking it away. Grumbling under your breath, “I gotta get my height back.”

And with that, you grabbed a pair of black heels and before you could go to slip them on, bucky swiped them from your hands and wordlessly knelt down and grabbed your leg. Halfway convinced you were dead and gone to heaven before going along and letting bucky slip the heels on your feet.

Bucky’s eyes gaze slowly up your legs, and body and found your eyes. Your breath hitched as his hand begin to slowly travel up your calve, thigh, and waist. Not taking a moment before his lips were on yours again, the kiss was sweeter now, so sweet you felt your teeth rot.

But then it grew wild, and needy when bucky’s hand squeezed at your waist and thigh. Pushing yourself against his body like a puzzle piece, kissing him was so natural to you, like a motion you were meant to do your whole life. Nipping at Bucky’s lower lip, earning a hungry groan from the soldier.

Both his hands found themselves on your thighs, catching you by surprise when he lifts you up to sit on the counter. Giving himself a better angle to push you flush against him, feeling pleasure shoot through you when your hips met his waist. you knew where this would go if you even got a taste though– and you both were already incredibly late. At this point, you wondered if you'd even go.

“Bucky, I'm serious, we gotta go…” you wine against his lips, Bucky chased after your touch but you pulled away.

A dramatic groan escaped his lips, his head falling in the nook of your shoulder. “I know, I know.”

You hopped off the counter, half mindedly grabbing a Vivienne Westwood pearls to finish the look, because god forbid your outfit to be boring. Bucky watched you with adoration as you both walked hand in hand, leading him out of your apartment. One last glance was spared at your mess of a bedroom, you sighed and told yourself you'd clean it later.

Bucky called over a cab and you two headed off to the Stark tower. One quiet and comfortable ride, bucky’s hand stayed placed on your thigh, your head fell onto his shoulder as your gaze landed on the passing new york streets. A small hum escaped your lips, Bucky squeezed your thigh gently and soon enough you were in front of the huge and practically sparkling tower.

The press and flashing paparazzi that found word of the gala yet were not invited littered around, most were gone as you were at least 40 minutes late. Sometimes you forgot these people you worked with were essentially celebrities in the public eye, they had PR teams and brand deals. You'd see tabloids with iron man's names or magazines in the streets talking about Captain America’s new love interest.

And apparently, Bucky Barnes was no different.

“Bucky Barnes! Winter soldier sir! Is this your new girlfriend!” a young man shouted from behind the barricade, a couple of flashes of cameras. You’d expect your pictures on some website with some arbitrary statement about you and Bucky soon. Even so, this man seemed much nicer than the overbearing fangirls of Steve or scum of the earth reporters yelling bottom-line misogynist comments towards Natasha or Wanda.

Bucky kept his head down as you wrapped an arm around his shoulder and forearm, he wasn't one for crowds or simply people who only knew him for what the media portrayed him as.

“You’re okay.” was all you spoke into his ear as you made your way into the doors, being hit with the cool air of the building. Your arms loosened around Bucky now you were in the somewhat safe zone, but his arm snaked around your waist as you walked into the more crowded area.

“Holy shit, I don't know which one to call the arm candy.” Sam's voice yelled from behind you. Being met with Sam in a nice black suit, along with Wanda in a sparkly red dress and Clint in an all-black suit as well.

Everyone looked amazing, it was rare to see them out of kevlar and super suits, or raggedy clothes thrown on after feeling like shit from tough missions.

“And Sam, wow! You clean up nice!” you complimented him.

“You look good, man.” Bucky said, a small smile on his face.

“You too, buck,” Sam said, nodding towards his new hair. “I like the hair, suits you, I still think you need to shave your beard.”

Bucky rolled his eyes, along with a small quirk at the end of his lips as he playfully smacked his shoulder. “Whatever.”

The small chatter continued, a glimpse of the inside of the loud ballroom as guests came and went. Bucky seemed to warm up to everyone more, a smile gracing his lips that made him look at least two decades younger. Soon a smooth and low voice was heard behind you.

“Sometimes I wonder if you are in the wrong profession, you know?” Natasha said, her vibrant red hair pinned up and wearing a beautiful black, slim dress, with two small cutouts on by her waist. You couldn't help but think it was a nod to looking more like the iconic widow hourglass she wore on her belt.

Your eyebrows furrowed slightly, “really?”

“Look at yourself, model material in front of me.” Natasha's eyes scanned up your body, a small smirk on your lips.

“You should thank Bucky.” you smiled, eyes glancing towards the man as he conversed with Sam and Steve. He looked genuinely happy and comfortable, a part of you swelled with pride for him. “He convinced me to wear this.”

“And thank god for that.” she laughed. “Also, I think Tony and Bruce were looking for you.”

It took just that for you to excuse yourself from the group, and give Bucky a comforting squeeze as your heels echoed and left the small gathering of avengers. Going to search for Bruce and Tony, apparently to speak about some new projects and talk with some foreign scientists looking for collaborations.

Meanwhile, the cap quartet was left sitting lazily around hallway couches and successfully avoiding the overbearing and bluntly disrespectful politicians and reporters, fans even. Natasha snuck close to Bucky and next to Sam as they spoke about nonsense or missions.

“You make her feel beautiful?” Natasha spoke, nursing a drink in her hands despite the fact she had only taken 2 sips in the past 20 minutes.

Bucky's mind went back to the bathroom counter or the edge of your bed, the way his heart raced and cock twitched as his hands roamed your body. when your breath hitched as he bent down before you and trailed his palms up your legs, and pressed himself against your core. Bucky hummed, trying to cover up the pink-tinted ears at the more than erotic memory,

“yeah, yeah, I think so.”

******

“I’m really glad this collaboration is going through, I’m hoping we get some really good things done soon.” Miles franco's upbeat and excited voice spoke.

your heels echoed in the hallway, just leaving a semi-empty meeting room with Bruce, Tony, and Pepper. Miles was a scientist and developer with new ideas and resources for some big projects Tony’s been wanting to start. He spoke kindly and had confidence in him that made you feel secure in working with him.

After a text from Bucky that the group had gone into the ballroom to actually do what they were there for, you excused yourself while Bruce continued to look over the contract you’d be signing in a few days, and Tony and Pepper went off to… you’d rather not think about it. Miles kindly offered to walk you back, as long as you introduced him to Natasha. with a smile and laugh you began to walk back.

“I am too, I’m also just glad to be back and working in one place.” you laughed, referring to your last few years of constant traveling, researching, and volunteering. meeting as many high-level and reputable people to kick start a better career. “Tony’s been very good to be over the past month.”

Miles clicked this tongue, making a tsk sound as his steps faltered. He wore a smirk that didn’t match his friendly smile from earlier, like something hidden beneath his conventionally attractive smile and dimples. Once you stopped, he began to close the gap between the two of you, shaking his head.

“You know, you don’t need Tony.” Miles' voice sounded coy, cocky. As if he knew better and had to teach you some lesson.

“Pardon?”

he chuckled, “you're smart, sexy, young, and know your way around a room. in a few years you’ll be running laps around both Tony and Bruce, they’re holding you back by making you work under them.”

you blinked, almost flinching from the sudden change in tone. “they aren’t making me do anything, and we’re partners if anything”

Miles flashed his smile again as he stepped closer and tried to reach for your hand, you smoothly avoided his touch, but he was practically in your face now.

“you know what I mean.” he sighed, “you could be so much more, making millions and having anything your heart desires. make a deal with me, I can give that to you.”

“I’m content with what I have now, thank you. and I’m definitely not making a deal with someone who insults my colleagues— my friends.” you snarled, trying to remain as professional as you could. not wanting to drag out any hostility from the man before you, the hallway was far away from the main ballroom and empty.

you were mentally done with the conversation, wanting away from Mile’s hot breath and uncomfortable stares (you were sure he was staring down your dress as he crept closer). Turning your back on the man, steps speeding up from before as you fumed with anger.

a low chuckle was heard from behind you, making your skin crawl. “fuck, that man really has you dickmatized or something.”

okay, what the fuck?

stopping dead in your tracks, gasping under your breath as your whipped your head back around. face scrunched in anger— stop, you have to tell yourself. He’s trying to make you mad, calm down.

“Excuse me, what now?”

“Barnes. You don’t think everyone knows by now? I’m positive he’s the only reason you're still at that shitty compound, working with those super freaks. you could be so much more if it wasn’t for him.”

Breathe in— breathe out.

trying to settle the rage settling low in your stomach, slowly rising to your chest. trying not to make your voice shake as you responded. “Bucky has absolutely nothing to do with my job.”

another low laugh. God, this man was fucking evil.

“Come on! you’re fucking amazing and potentially one of the smartest people on earth, that guy doesn’t deserve you! I’m sure with the amount of brain damage the commies gave him he can’t even count to 10.” Miles frustrated, closing the gap once again, you felt stuck in place. “face it, he’s a fucking nut who only knows how to handle a gun like a mad man, a ticking time bomb.”

your fist clenched until your nails dug into your palm, blood trickling down your hand. Your breath was unsteady with rage, but you couldn’t move— you felt frozen under his disgusting gaze. Mile's hand moved to grab at your waist and pull you close, you jerked back.

heavy exhales, your voice raised slightly - keep it professional - you must have been shaking. “don’t insult my- my boyfriend’s intelligence, you are not even an ounce of the man he is. and do not even try to touch me again.”

Miles rolled his eyes, trying to step closer again if possible. “come one, don’t be like that babe-“

“and consider your part in this collaboration gone. you will not be making any more money or deals with Stark industries from now on.” your voice settled, you sounded stern and strong. holding your head high as you held back from screaming in his face.

Mile’s features dropped, the cocky smirk faded and he looked weak – desperate and small. “you don’t have the right to do that.”

now, you got in his face. “yes, Miles. yes, I do.”

he genuinely looked scared and pride warmed in your chest. getting one last ‘fuck you’ in as you very harshly slammed your heel on his foot. he groaned and curled into himself, you hoped to draw blood there. you were wearing stilettos.

picking up your pace as you fled from him, head still held high but you felt shaky. this wasn’t the first time you’d experienced sexual harassment or insults and you were sure it wasn’t going to be the last but the meer mention of Bucky shook you, the insult towards Bruce and Tony. the way he felt like he held something over your head and felt obligated to touch you. your skin crawled.

you were left in a daze, finding your way back to the ballroom, warm lights and loud chatter everywhere. instantly hiding from the crowded areas and searching for Bucky. you edged with anxiety.

Breathe in— breathe out.

Bucky stood near the bar, nursing a drink that probably had zero effect on him. you sped over to him and pushed out a smile.

“Buck! sorry, I got caught up!” you spoke as you approached him. Bucky’s eyes lit up lighter than any light in the room, making you feel warm and comfortable again.

“Hey, doll.” Bucky smiled, reaching to wrap his arm around your waist. “don’t worry, how’d the talk go?”

you opened your mouth to speak of the contract and project, finding a way to leave the hallway interaction out. but Bucky interrupted you abruptly, worry fell onto his features as he brought your hand into his.

“Sweetheart, what is this? are you okay?” he looked down at your bleeding palm, small cuts the size of your nails and the tips and cuticle of your nails stained red.

“It's nothing.” you shrugged it off and slipped your hand away from his grasp.

“No.” Bucky spoke, stern and clear. Grabbing your hand back and running his fingers along the small cuts. “It's not. What happened?”

You sighed heavily, avoiding eye contact but Bucky knew much better. He grabbed your chin between his thumb and index, your eyes still gazed down.

“Baby.” bucky whispered.

“Seriously, Bucky, it's nothing. I just had a frustrating person in that meeting, didn’t even realize I was doing it.” you rattled, grasping for an excuse without having to lie to the man.

Bucky sighed, pulling you away to the side with no word. Wetting an entirely too expensive Stark napkin with alcohol and wiping at your plams, stinging slightly. Bucky worked so gently, his hand wrapped around your forearm made you feel warm.

“I've seen you handle Stark at his lowest moment, bark off assholes like it's nothing. It is obviously not nothing, doll”

You wouldn't win this, not with the most stubborn man in front of you. You watched as he smoothed his thumb over your hand.

“this guy…” Bucky listened intently, his full attention on you and adoration yet, worry dripped from his features. “The collaborator from France, he said some rude things about Tony, Bruce and, uh… you. He tried to sweet talk me into leaving Stark industrie. Kept calling me all these objectifying names, he’s a dick I can’t believe I was excited about this project.”

Bucky's back straightened and his jaw clenched. He looked around the room, almost to find the man responsible. It was Bucky's turn to clench his first, knuckles turning white.

“and you?” was all Bucky could manage to mumbled out.

“I told him off and smashed his foot with my heel, and I'm making Tony diminish the contract.” you replied.

“Good.” Bucky nodded, snarling under his breath. “deserves a lot more than that.”

“I’m okay, seriously. just shook me up for a moment.” you reassure the man, because there was no way he was letting go of this. you took Bucky’s hand and dragged him towards the dance floor. “now dance with me, sergeant.”

the bright, boyish smile reluctantly returned to his face. hands almost instantly falling at your side and pulling you flush again this chest. you chased into the touch, grinning.

And that's how you and Bucky spent the next few moments, soft live music played in the background, other couples and friends swayed around you two. Bucky would quietly hum along to the music sometimes, your head rested on his chest and you'd feel the soft vibrations from him. You'd never understand how safe and secure you could feel in someone's arms, the idea sounded so out of reach and impossible only a few months ago. God knows you had never even thought to make time to explore that idea, but here it was, coming to you without even realizing it. It felt so natural now.

Bucky's hand smoothed on the exposed skin on your back and arms, he breathed freely, not feeling tense or on edge like most of his life. And for the first time since the alps, Bucky felt soft inside– in a sense. Bucky didn't feel dangerous, like he would break the person that he held in his arms. He didn't feel like an animal, a machine, or a murderer. Bucky smelled the lavender conditioner in your hair, the expensive smelling perfume on you. Bucky felt like a man in love with a girl, he is one.

Oh god, Bucky Barnes is in love. A feeling he has not felt since maybe 1942? when he took that red headed girl to coney island, but even that could never compare to the feelings swelling in his chest now. Being in love was scary– so, so scary. But with you warm and smiling in his arms, it was hard for Bucky to think of anything else.

“Bucky.” you wined, Bucky pulled away just enough to see your face. Your eyelids flutter in tiredness, a haze filtered across your eyeballs. “Are you obliged to stay for anything?”

“Not that I know of, doll. You want to get out of here?” Bucky spoke so smoothly, so flirtatious. He felt younger and more confident.

You nodded lazily, and Bucky looked around to see the crowd had begun to disperse. People hung round and talked, most were slightly tipsy. The craze of politicians and reporters settled. Bucky's hand smooth from your shoulder to your hand, ready to pull you into him and guide you home.

But his hands grazed the small cuts on your palm, he tensed. Gladly, you didn't notice. Bucky had one more thing to do before he left.

“Sweetheart, I have to go ask Steve something real quick, meet me in the lobby and i'll take you home?”

“Everything okay?” you asked, Bucky hoped you didn’t pick up on his… scheming. Flashing a smile, “of course, I’ll be quick.”

Nodding again, your heels echoed away from Bucky, the dress train cascading behind you beautifully. You reminded Bucky of some sort of angel.

A slight scowl fell upon Bucky's face as his blue eyes searched the ground, he found Steve with ease. Bucky had some sort of sixth sense when it came to finding Steve, ever since they were just two pre-teens getting lost in the city, Bucky was always the one having to search and rescue him from large crowds. The added height now just made it even easier.

His steps were heavy and with purpose, finally approaching the blonde. Standing close to Sam, Bruce and Clint. Good.

“Hey, buck. Where did your girl go?” Steve asked, all eyes now on him as he joined the small circle. Bucky's ears tinted pink towards the mention of you being his - he hoped you'd want that.

“We’re about to leave, she's getting tired.” Bucky replied. Steve opened his mouth to respond, small talk maybe, or a short goodbye and a pat on the back but Bucky was already onto other things.

Bucky turned to the timid scientist, getting Bruce’s attention. “Hey, banner! Who was the guy that y/n was with earlier? Looked french.”

Somewhat of a rhetorical question, Bucky kinda knew of the guy, he knew enough from what he heard from you. Steve was watching from the side with realization soon growing on his face, but he didn't speak a word.

“He's a scientist that Tony and I were wanting to collaborate with, I think he is still here if you're looking for him. At the bar I think.” Bruce replied.

“Great, thank you.” Bucky forced out a half hearted smile and began to turn away from the group. Steve grabbed onto his shoulder before he could heave.

“What are you doing?” Steve asked, he knew Bucky better than most and recognized the off look in his eyes. Steve grew concerned.

Bucky looked at the others in the group, pulling Steve close and hoped none of them picked up the words he whispered into his ear. “Some punk tried to come onto her like a creeper, shook her up real good, talked badly about the team and kept trying to come onto her.”

“And you plan to do what?” Steve knew the answer to his own question.

Bucky gave Steve a knowing look. Bucky was clearly growing annoyed and Steve could tell when he started talking like it was the 40s again, strong Brooklyn accent coming out with it. “Gonna teach the fella’ a lesson.”

Steve exhaled, slowly letting go of Bucky's shoulder. his eyes fell onto the bar as he found the man. steve didn’t object.

It’ll be okay if he is a little late, right?

tag list: @matchat3a @sebsgirl71479 @heavenswrld @ivywasmaroon @nt-multi-fandom @michaefuckinglangdon @fand0mskullfa1ry @lilliarussell @athenabarnes @almosttoopizza @genlovesdcb @i-l-y-3000 @timotheesrealgf

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #james bucky barnes #marvel #marvel fanfiction #bucky fic #bucky fluff #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x female reader #bucky imagine #fic rec #fic update

[lowkeyrobin]

Tubbo’s partner meeting all his streamer friends for the first time?

ooooo hell yeah man!! ; thank you for requesting, hope u enjoy!! 🫶🫶🫶 ; sorry this is so short, writers block is killing me lol

TUBBO ; mini streamer meetup + y/n the cashier

summary ; you, a cashier at a local supermarket, have been in a relationship with Twitch streamer Tubbo for a little while, and he wants you to meet his friends

warnings ; language, insecurities

word count ; 613

masterlist

Cash registers beep at every barcode they scan, the doors slightly creaking each time they open and close. The dim, cold lighting in the store gave you an extra shot of blue light poisoning to your eyes each time you looked anywhere but down. You feel your head absolutely pounding as you scan each item that this customer was now paying for, each and every beep tensing every muscle in your brain.

You didn't want this headache right now, especially since you were leaving in an hour to meet with your boyfriend and some of his friends for dinner. You were already insecure as you knew you didn't fit in with them, you didn't know shit about video games or streaming, and you weren't funny at all. You didn't know how to talk to people, especially when you barely knew anything about what they liked.

You silently panic and overthink while you wait for the customer to pay, bagging the last of their items for them.

Jesus fucking Christ, this was going to be absolutely horrible.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

You sit down at the table next to Tubbo, being fashionably late of course.

It's you're first time meeting all these friends and you're already making a bad impression. Great.

You swiftly apologize to everyone, holding back a genuine panic attack. But, you had to power through. You tell yourself you're okay, knowing you're not, but it's alright.

At the table, other than Tubbo, sits Freddie, Tommy, his girlfriend Molly, and Ranboo. Maybe you were being a little overdramatic about who was going to be there, basically his best friend, his best friends best friend, and his best friends girlfriend. Still, you didn't know anything personal about these friends, and you didn't want to leave them with bad impressions, especially since they had valuable reputations and you didn't.

Most of the dinner is them asking questions and you answering, the other part being the four talking to one another while you listen, unable to make any conversation. The brunette you were here for understood your anxiety and awkwardness, and you couldn't help but mentally thank him for only inviting three people here tonight.

Tommy turns to you, trying to strike a little conversation. "Y/n, what do you do for work? I don't think I ever asked"

"Oh, uh, I work as a cashier downtown." You nod, placing another spoonful of soup in your mouth.

He nods, "You ever play video games? I mean, you seem like the type"

"Uh, not really" You shrug, "I don't really have anything to play games on other than my phone, and like, most mobile games suck"

"Real!" Ranboo exclaims

"True that!" Freddie chuckles, "I've never found one game that's not overrun by Facebook Moms, homophobic teenage boys, or is just flat out bad"

"I know, right! Like it's either lack of being a good game or lack of a good fanbase"

Thankfully, right after that moment, you found a little spark with these people and were able to hold up a conversation with them. Tubbo watches and listens, a proud smile on his face, silently thanking Tommy for breaking you out of your shell.

The rest of the night went pretty well other than embarrassing yourself in the beginning, but on the walk home, Tubbo made sure to reassure you that his friends already loved you. You bonded over music and types of content and shows and movies with them, and it was so delightful for him to see you get along with his friends.

"You're a natural at this"

"You say that while I'm drugged up on children's Ibuprofen and allergy medicene"

He lightly smiles, "Take the fucking compliment!"

#lowkeyrobin #mcyt x reader #mcyt preferences #mcyt oneshot #tubbo x reader #tubbo oneshot #tubbo #qsmp tubbo #mcyt x gn reader #mcyt x y/n #mcyt x you #gn reader #gender neutral reader

[loubouskz]

strange things happen

han jisung x thick!fem!reader

description: tour just ended, and they were going back home. jisung should be happy and excited but can't help but be in his head. when he's told about the backrooms, he didn't really think he'd end up there, nor did he think he would meet a girl too. but then again, the strangest things happen to good people.

genre: strangers to lovers, the backrooms

warning: SMUT!, pov changes a few times, foggy in head space, anxiety fear, mentions of meditation, insomnia(in text but not mentioned), crying, panic attack, passing out, body insecurity, jisung being a sweetheart, somewhat fear of water, yelling, overthinking, kissing, making out, slight marking kink, oral(both receiving), the smallest bit of dirty talk, creampie

wc: 8.8k(somewhat proof-read)

a/n: idk why I wrote this!🤣 I just couldn't shake the thought of it, so I had to write it and now I absolutely love it. I tried my best to explain the levels they were in, basing it off the game: The Complex: Backrooms Found Footage. I think I did okay. tho choosing what skz member to write it for was hard but ended up choosing jisung. anyway, I hope you enjoy this! I would love to hear your guys feedback!❤️❤️

taglist: @hgema @jisunglyricist

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“what? you two honestly don’t believe in that stuff, right?” minho asked, placing his drink down. jisung hadn’t been listening to the conversation and looked around the dinner table. he saw everyone laughing and enjoying dinner while he was off wandering around in his head. the hyung line(besides minho who was sitting next to jisung) were finished eating and up and doing their own thing. while the maknae line were still sat at the table. they had just finished tour and were having a celebratory dinner party with the whole staff and crew.

“you never know what could be real minho.” jeongin said, shrugging his shoulders. jisung scrunched his eyebrows. “what are we talking about?” he asked, looking around the table. “the backrooms.” felix answered, leaning into the table. “what’s that?” he asked, poking around at his food. jisung didn’t really feel hungry, just more tired than anything. all he wanted to do was go to the hotel and sleep. 

“the backrooms are like an urban legend. its were you noclip out of our everyday world filled with people to a liminal space. there’s different areas or levels. the most famous one being this.” felix said, showing jisung a photo. an open room with yellow wallpaper and fluorescent lighting. “there’s been a lot of short films and documentaries to come out recently about it.” jeongin said. “but they’re fake.” seungmin cut in. “we don’t know that.” jeongin said, turning his head to seungmin. “basically you end up there, and you go through the levels to find a way out.” felix said. “that’s creepy.” jisung said as the two boys continued to show and tell him more about the backrooms.

the more felix and jeongin talked about the backrooms, the more fear set in jisung’s head. minho was starting to worry about him. “okay boys! i think that’s enough, let’s go enjoy this party before everyone gets too tired.” minho said, pushing his chair back to stand up. giving the two younger boys a stare, basically to say. shut the fuck up right now. everyone followed minho to the dance floor and processed to have a fun night. dancing the night away.

jisung could feel his body dancing to whatever song was playing. but he kept going back and forth in his head and being present while dancing. his brain had felt foggy for the last few days. even more now since the idea of the backrooms being real. he knows he shouldn’t believe it, but he can’t help it. the idea of being stuck and alone, going in endless loops, trying to find a way out…it scared him.

the party seemed to end quickly. though two hours had passed, it felt like six minutes. everyone cleaned up the areas that were messed up, and in a blink of an eye, jisung was in the van on the way back to the hotel. he doesn’t remember getting in the van and doesn’t even try to either. jisung took a deep breath and looked out the window. seeing the bright lights of the streetlamps and neon signs for the clubs, bushes and trees blurring at the speed. jisung just wanted to sleep. that’s all he needed. it had been a very long day, and he was ready for it to be over.

once in his shared hotel room. jisung took a long hot shower to relax his nerves. though he really didn’t do anything during the shower. he just stood under the water, forehead pressed against the cold wall till the water ran cold. jisung looked at himself in the mirror as he brushed his teeth for the night. he felt like he was seeing himself in third-person, and his body felt like a shell. he couldn’t understand why he was feeling like this. he’s been taking his medicine, never missing a day or night. jisung turned off the light and exited the bathroom. he removed his towel and put on a pair of boxers and his pajama pants on. not bothering to put on the matching shirt. 

he climbed into the bed and turned off his side lamp, ready for bed.  “you okay ji?” he heard minho voice ask. jisung turned his head and smiled at minho. “yeah, i’m fine man. just really tired and ready to sleep. can you turn off your light as well?” jisung said to him. minho gave a worried face but did what jisung asked with a nod. “if you need someone to talk and listen to you, you know you can talk to me. right, jisung?” minho asked out in the dark. jisung nodded his head, then remembered the lights were off. “i know. nothing’s wrong. i promise.” he said out loud before yawning. “night minho.” jisung said in a tired voice. “good night, jisung.” minho responded back.

why wasn’t sleep coming to him. jisung laid awake in the dark, staring at the ceiling. his arms under his head. his mind and body had felt tired. he wanted to sleep, so why wasn’t it coming to him. he didn’t want to toss around too much, scared that he would wake up minho. the one thing he didn’t want to do was worry him even more. so jisung stayed still and waited for sleep to take him. but it never did, he watched as the sun came up and heard the city become loud and full of life again. he heard minho starting to wake up. jisung turned over and closed his eyes, pretending to sleep.

he heard minho get out of bed and walk over to him. shaking him to wake up. “wake up. we have to get to the airport.” minho said. jisung pretended to stir awake and sat up. “what time is it?” jisung asked. “6:43am. now come on and got to get dressed and packed.”

just like last night everything seemed to move fast but slow at the same time. jisung was dressed in his outfit for the day. a white loose fit tee, his black jacket, black baggy pants with his sneakers, dad cap, and face mask. when he blinked and looked up he at the international airport, everybody was ready to go home. he waved to the flashing cameras and stays that were there.

the group made their way through the airport, doing everything they needed to do to get to their gate in time. once they were there, got their tickets scanned and passports looked at. jisung was the last one. when he looked up to continue to board the plane, everyone was so far ahead of him. he doesn’t want to say he freaked out a little, feeling like he was getting left behind even though they were all on the same flight. but that is exactly what he felt. like his flight or fight response kicked in. he secured his carryon and jogged to catch up to the rest of his members, but the more steps he stook, the further they got. “hey chan wait up!” jisung called out to his leader, then he tripped and fell down. 

jisung closed his eyes and waited for the impact of the floor, but it didn’t come. he felt the wind starting to pick up. he opened his eyes and being to panic. this has to be a dream. jisung was free falling in the sky. he couldn’t do anything but scream and cry as the city buildings got closer and closer. he closed his eyes once again, waiting for death to hit him.

then he hit a carpeted floor, but not hard but definitely enough to make a thud sound…like he tripped and fell. jisung pushed himself up onto his knees and saw where he was. just like the picture felix had shown him.

open room, yellow walls, and fluorescent lights. he was in the backrooms.

no no no no this cannot be happening. “i’m dreaming. i must be dreaming.” jisung said as he did everything he could think of to wake himself up. he pinched his arm. hit his leg. slapped his cheek. hell, he even stood up and ran into one of the walls near him and fell down. “ow.” jisung said. falling onto his butt with his head hurting. jisung didn’t know what to do. he busted into tears as he ran. ran and ran. he felt like he was going in circles. everything looked the same! this can’t be real. he stopped and thought for a quick second where he should go. he yanked his face mask off. took a deep breath and continued to run. it doesn’t make any sense of how he could have ended up here. he wanted to be with his members. on the plane. going home. the tears blurring up his vision to the point where he couldn’t see. it felt like everything was closing in around him. he started to sleep black dots. everything went dark.

opening the journal in hand, going back to read what you wrote so you wouldn’t go insane and forget who you are. saying the following words aloud. what your name was. how old you were. your birthday. what year it was. the date it was when you got here. where you are from and currently living at. family, friends, and pets. what you were studying. etc. anything. you didn’t want to risk it even if it wasn’t going to happen. 

once you were done, you placed the journal in the pocket of the hoodie you were wearing. continuing down the nevering-end yellow halls. you don’t know how long you’ve been here, but it felt like years at this point. you don’t know how you end up here either, what this place was, or how to get out. the feeling of someone watching you never going away, even though you knew you were alone.

you turned the corner and physically jumped out of your skin. freezing at that moment. just ahead of you, was a person. a man lying on the ground. he looked to be passed out. you didn’t know whether to go up and shake him to see if he was okay or run. after debating with yourself, you decided to see if he was alive. you slowly walked over to him, taking quiet steps.

once you were right next to him, you squatted down. now seeing his face. you could see he was asian and around your age. his cheeks puffy and red with swollen eyes. you felt a sting to your heart. he must have just shown up here and most likely completely terrified. 

“hey are you okay?” i asked, shaking him on his shoulder. he groaned as he started to wake up. “come on, get up.” i said, shaking him a bit harder. his eyes fluttered open and saw me. i could tell panic set in. he quickly flipped over and scooted away from me. looked around and made a face before looking at me again. “i’m not going to hurt you.” i said. “how do i know that?” he said back. “because we are in the same boat and trying to get out.” i told him. he brought his knees up to his chest. “my name is y/n. what’s yours?” i said. “i’m jisung. han jisung.” he said. “well it’s nice to meet you, jisung.” i said with a smile. “do you know the way out?” he asked.

i stood back up. “no i don’t. sorry. if i did, i wouldn’t be here…where ever i am.” i sighed out, looking around at the yellow walls. “you’ve never heard of this place?” jisung said, looking up at me. “no. have you?” i questioned. he nodded his head slowly before standing up. “just last night, my friends were telling me about this place. it’s called the backrooms.” jisung said, “it’s where you clip out of our everyday world and you’re here.” jisung looked around the room with a scowl. he’s crazy. 

he brought eyes back to me and saw the look on my face. “you don’t believe me..” he said, taking off his cap and running his fingers through his hair. “no. that sounds too insane.” i told him. “there’s this place, a warehouse, a maintenance hall, pool area thing, house, and a lot more.” he said. “i’ve never seen any of those places you’ve mentioned besides this one.” i told him. jisung’s cheeks started to turn red. probably out of embarrassment. i breathed in, “how about we just stick together and find a way out.” i said. he nodded, “good idea.” so we began to walk the eerie room. 

“so…” jisung said, making me turn my head to him. “what do you do? i mean like in our world.” he asked. i smiled, “i’m studying at my dream university while doing part-time at a music shop on the side.” i expressed with happiness. “you?” i directed to him. “oh i’m a k-pop idol. i’m in a group called stray kids. have you heard of us?” he stated. “no sorry.” i said, shaking my head. jisung was telling me about himself and telling stories about his members. which i’ve learned that there is eight of them in total. “we recently just started getting really big these last two and half years. then covid came and we were stuck at home all of 2020.” jisung said. i stopped in my tracks. the fuck? 2020. have i been in here for that long? “my group and i just finished our tour called maniac.” jisung said, turning his head to look at me. when he didn’t see me, he turned around. 

“you okay?” he asked, walking back to me. “2020. it’s 2020?” i exclaimed. he shook his head, “no it’s april 5th 2023.” jisung hesitated to say. he furrowed his eyebrows, “what year did you think it was?” he questioned. “2019. i showed up here on june 9, 2019. i didn’t think i was in here for that long.” i cried out, feeling tears welt up in my eyes. jisung’s eyes widened. “hey hey, don’t cry y/n. we’re gonna get out of here. i promise.” he comforted, placing his arms onto my shoulders. a few tears fell to my cheeks. “none of that.” he said, quickly wiping them away with the knuckle of his pointer finger. “we’re going to get back home. alright?” he said. i nodded and sniffed, “okay.” i told him. jisung gave me a bright smile. “okay then, let’s get a move on.” he said, holding out his hand to take. i placed my hand in his and we continued on our way, trying to find the exit.

turning left and right, going straight. all of it seemed to be the same, the same damn yellow walls with every turn and move. the quiet noise of the fluorescent lights buzzing. 

“i feel like we are going in circles y/n.” jisung said out loud. “i don’t think we are?” i said, more in a question sense. we did another left turn and were met with a dark dead-end. there was a crawl space giving off light. “should we go through it?” jisung asked, squatting down in front of it. i looked at the size of it and looked at my body. 

i was on the thicker size. a tummy, thick thighs and hips, big boobs and butt. i became overly aware of my size. starting to feel small and insecure. “umm, i don’t think i can fit through that.” i quietly told jisung. he looked up at me, eyeing me up and down then back at the crawl space. “i think you’ll get through. plus you won’t know unless you try.” jisung said in a nice tone. “will you try?” he asked. my head came up with a million and one thoughts in one second on why i shouldn’t do it. “as long as you won’t look.” i said, avoiding eye contact. “i can do that.” jisung said while nodding his head.

jisung stood back up and took a few steps back. i walked closer to the crawl space and got on my hands and knees. i looked back at jisung and he had both of his hands covering his eyes and turned to the side. i turned back to the crawl space and started to make my way through. my upper half made it easy, it was a little snug at my hips- but i got through. i stood back up and called out to jisung. 

“i made it!” i said loud and proud. “great!” he said. soon enough, jisung crawled through and was standing next to me. we looked around and the yellow walls were starting to fade into gray metal like material. “i guess this is progress.” i declared, walking ahead. “yeah.” he said, following by my side. as we walked further into the gray walls, we heard a ding. “what was that?” jisung asked. we looked all around us till my eyes landed on an elevator to the right of us, tucked away in a cornered with the doors open.

“jisung there’s an elevator.” i said, making my way over to it. jisung quickly followed. it was a small elevator, but both of us fit with a comfortable distance between us. jisung looked down at the button panel. “well there’s only one direction to go.” he joked. i looked at the panel and sure enough, he was right. we could only go up. “let’s get out of here.” i said, nodding my head. jisung pressed the up button. the elevator doors quickly closed and we started heading up.

“i just thought of something.” jisung said, leaning his back against the wall. “what is it?” i mumbled. “if you’ve been in here since 2019, how are you still alive? there’s no food, no drinkable water. have you even slept?” jisung asked. i looked at him with wide eyes. “i. i honestly don’t know. it doesn’t feel like i’ve been in here that long. maybe a few days or weeks? and i’ve slept, but it was to take a break from walking. not because my energy was low and i needed sleep.” i replied, trying to understand it myself. “wow.” jisung said in pure awe. “i hope you’re not here for as long as i’ve been.” i added, just as the doors opened up. “i hope so too, but then again. i think we are going to get out of here. a lot sooner.” he said with a smile as he exited the elevator.

i followed behind him and to my surprise. we were in a completely different place. the walls were now white tiles, our shoes echoing throughout the hall. soon we came out to an open room with water. “this was the pool area i was talking about!” jisung exclaimed, giving me another one of those big smiles. i felt butterflies dance around in my stomach. god, does he have a killer smile. wait no, don’t think like that y/n. just because this is the person, especially male. does not mean you can form a crush on him.

jisung walked over to the railing and looked down to the right. i came up beside him and looked the same way. he turned his head to me. “do you believe me now.” he said, more in a statement. i could only nod my head. he pushed off the railing and walked behind me. “someone was here.” jisung said. i turned around and looked to see what he saw. there was a blanket on the floor. “so we’re not alone?” i asked. “either we’re not or that person already got out.” jisung said, “but if they are still here, let’s hope they’re as nice as you.” he added, turning around to face to water again.

“i think we are going to have to walk through the water.” jisung stated, going to the steps into the water. i slowly walked over to the steps and watched as he got in. “does it get deeper?” i asked. jisung brought his eyes to mine. “can’t swim?” he asked. “i can doggy paddle, but that’s about it.” i said. jisung rose his hand from his side. “don’t worry.” he said. i made my way down the steps and put my hand his. his hand was so soft and warm. i looked up at him. “i won’t let you go.” jisung promised.

the water covered the bottom half of our legs. deep enough to slush the water around but shallow enough to walk in. as we made our way through the water, there was an opening on the right but there was also another crawl space. jisung turned to me and i shook my head. “not that one.” i pleaded. “we don’t have to.” jisung responded, squeezing my hand. so we took the right hall, which was a little dark considering there was no light other than the sunlight at the end…if you could even call it that. whatever it was.

we slowly made our way to the end of the hall where there was a big circular column and a set of curvy steps out of the water. we quickly started up the stairs to get out of the water, jisung letting me go first. once i reached the top, there was another elevator. “if the rest of this easy to get out of, we’ll be home in no time.” i said, looking back at jisung. jisung looked back down at me and smiled. i glanced down at his lips and back up at his eyes, seeing he did the same thing. “yeah.” he whispered, a ding from the elevator made us jump.

jisung cleared his throat and guided out his hand to let me enter the elevator first. once we were both inside, i pushed the up button this time and watched as the doors closed once again. there was a bit of awkward silence. “tell me more about yourself, y/n. about things you want to do and achieve in life.” jisung said, looking down at his feet. i thought about it for a second and then told him a mini version of my life story and my goals and dreams.

jisung was laughing his butt off by the time the elevator doors opened, making me giggle. we looked out the doors and saw a mall, our laughter dropping at the slight of it. we stepped out and carefully eyed our surroundings. there was an empty fountain, newspaper and random magazines scattered around the floor, dark and quiet like every place has been.  just our shoes making the most noise. we made our way forward, jisung noticing a map hung on the wall.

“do you can this will help us?” jisung asked. “i don’t know.” i said, trying to read the map. “i can’t tell what it says.” i added, looking at jisung. “me neither.” he sighed out. we walked around, not really finding anything. just more dark, dimly lit halls and rooms and rarely stuff in them. besides a chair or two.

we entered the last hall, leading us to something different. “at least we can kinda tell where we are. better than the yellow room.” jisung said, making me smile, “yeah, you’re right about that.” i replied. then my eyes caught a glimpse at something ahead of us. “is that a red light?” i asked, picking up my pace a little. that’s new. we looked at the little hall where the red light was coming from, but it lead no where.

so we just continued walking forward. making turns left and right whenever we felt like it, unless it lead us to a dead-end. to help pass the time we came up with jokes and telling embarrassing stories. 

it was easy talking jisung, even if i had just met him. it felt like we had been friends for awhile. for once and surprisingly, i was happy i was stuck in here and that this happened to me. because i would have never been able to meet han jisung and get to know him for him. as terrible as it is. having someone with me, him with him, made me feel a lot better. 

“hey y/n!” jisung shouted, “come here, i think i found the way to the elevator!” i quickly turned around and followed jisung down a narrow hall with random turns. it opened up to a small cafeteria thing with the elevator on the left wall to the back. 

“we are making so much progress!” jisung said happily and ran over to the elevator. bouncing up and down like a little kid. i laughed as i made my way over to him and stood next to him. “how many levels are there?” i asked him as the elevator dinged. “i don’t know, but hopefully not too many.” he said as we stepped in the elevator for the third time. 

the doors opened up to a hotel with chairs thrown everywhere, lit up by the wall sconces. “well this level it a bit more creepy.” i stated out loud. we left the elevator and went to the right. “it says there’s a dining hall, maybe there’s food there.” jisung said. “are you actually hungry?” i questioned. “no, but it would be nice to eat something right now.” jisung said with a smile. soon enough, we came into the dining hall. 

“shit there’s nothing in here.” jisung whined. i walked over to the crawl space and looked in. “no where to go in there.” i said, turning back around. “dead-end?” jisung sighed. “dead-end.” i said back to him. he groaned as we pushed our way back the way we came to go down a different hall. we came across a small gap in the wall. jisung looked at me. “should we try it?” he asked. “sure why not. we have all the time in the world.” i answered with laugh. 

jisung fit like it was nothing. for me, it was a bit of a squeeze, but bearable. it was just another long hall, just very small and dim. eventually, it opened back up and the elevator was right in front of us and already open. “luck seems to be on our side, we’re going to get home in no time!” jisung said as we entered the elevator.

the doors closed and we only went up for a few seconds then stopped. there was a tap on the door. we both looked at each other. two more taps, jisung stood in front of me in case there was actual someone there. four more taps against the door before the finally opened up. chairs were blocking the exit the leave, the room completely red. we couldn’t get out.

“are we suppose to get out?” i asked, jisung slowly shock his head. he quickly pressed the button to go up so the doors could close again. slowly but sure the doors closed and we started going up again. jisung spun around to face me. “i feel like we are getting closer to go home.” he said with a smile. the doors opened back up and saw the yellow wallpaper. “why the hell are we back here?” i said, pushing past jisung. yellow walls, carpeted floors, fluorescent lights. I turned back to jisung to had a defeated look on his face. i felt my eyes starting to burn. “you’re a fucking liar. i knew i shouldn’t have trust you.” i felt my voice cracking in the sentence. jisung jumped at the sound of my hurt voice. “y/n.” he said, stepping towards me. i back up and shook my head. “no.” i said, before turning around. i walked over to a wall and sled down. crying and feeling hopeless. 

“there’s no way this is the same.” i heard jisung say. he heard him jogging around, i couldn’t even bring myself to look up to see where he was going. i’m such an idiot for thinking i could get out of this place. there’s no way out, just endless loops of different rooms all feeling the same way. hell it’s been five years since i got here. everyone probably thinks i’m dead by now. my family, my friends, my two roommates, everyone who knew me. thinks i’m dead. what’s the point of trying to get out of here when they think i’m dead and gone.

i felt a pair of hands grab my cheeks and push my face up. i saw jisung’s face with tears and a light smile. “it’s not the same y/n.” jisung said, he grabbed my hands and pulled me up. “come on, all we have to do is follow the beeping.” he said, dragging me along with him at a fast pace. we turned a couple a corners and i was first it wasn’t the same. just the color of the room. instead of there just being rooms entering rooms, there were also columns now and more space going up. i hardly had time to process what was happening, jisung just kept pulling me with him. stopping every now and then to listen. 

“what are you liste-” jisung shushed me. then i heard the beep he had been following. “it’s this way.” he said, making a left turn, then a right. the beeping continued to get louder and louder as we got closer. we turned around corner and was greeted into a big room with the elevator. the next part happened so quickly. jisung turned around, placed his hands on my cheeks again and gave my a hard kiss with passion. i yelped as i wasn’t expecting that to happen. i recovered fast and kissed him back, placing my hands on his chest which made jisung smile into the kiss. he pulled away, leaving his forehead on mine.

“we’re going home like i promised.” he said just above a whisper. i looked into his soft brown eyes. “i’m sorry i yelled at you.” i apologized. he shook his head, “no i understand, you want to get back home as much i as i do and when you saw the yellow walls again you felt lied to. i understand, i would have felt the same way.” he told me. jisung removed his hands from my cheeks and down my arms. grasping my left hand with his right. “let’s keep going.” he said, to which i nodded to.

we entered the elevator once again, pressing the up button. the door closed once more, the elevator moving up once again. jisung squeezed my hand, making me turn to him. he leaned in for another kiss which i gladly accepted. it started out as a sweet innocent kiss but became more heated. jisung pushed me against the wall, pressing his body to mine. making me moan into the kiss. with that small opening, jisung slid his tongue into my mouth. exploring every nook and cranny. he tasted like a muted minty flavor. i ran my hands up his body and to the back of his neck, playing with the hair poking out of the cap. jisung groaned into the kiss, rolling his hips into mine. i whined, pushing my hips to his. feeling his erection growing by the second.

“god, i want to fuck you so bad.” jisung said, once he pulled his lips away. my body feeling tingly, goosebumps forming on my skin. i shivered at his words. i went to respond but the elevator dinged and the doors opened back up. “if we can find a not so creepy area, i’ll let you fuck me.” i said to him, looking dead in the eyes. he groaned and gave me another sloppy kiss.

he interlaced our fingers and pulled me out of the elevator. we only made it a few steps before stopping, realizing how dark it was. we could hardly see each other. we continued walking but very slowly, not knowing what was ahead.

just a few more steps forward, a loud snap echoed in the room we were in accompanied with red lights shining the area. we were in the middle of a street with few houses following the side. at the end of the road was a tunnel with the elevator in the center of the tunnel. i looked around at the lights. the redness gave the feeling a not welcoming feeling, like more eyes were on us then the last time. we listened and watched out for any nobody that could be here, but there was no one. not even in the houses. we continued to the tunnel and made our way inside the elevator.

the doors opened to a clean white wall with oak wood floors. nothing on the floor, but a blanket up ahead in front of a window. jisung bent down to it and felt it as i looked out the window. “it’s completely cold, whoever was here hasn’t been here for awhile.” jisung explained. “i think we’re in an apartment complex.” i said. i remember that being one of the places jisung said we could turn up at. jisung stood up and looked at the window as well. just looking at it gave me an uneasy feeling. it was dark ‘outside’, only light coming from all the windows and maybe one of two lamps. jisung turned to me, “let’s keep going.” he said, nodding his way down the hall.

turn after turn we were just greeted by more dead-ends. coming back out of one of the last halls. before we could even make it fully, we stopped in our tracks. there right in front of us was a an opening. like the building had been cut in half. 

we got closer to it. “that would be a long fall.” jisung said as he looked down. i nodded my head. “yeah it would be.” i said. jisung looked at the other opening his could see. “do you think i could make that jump?” he questioned. my eyes widened. “please do not try to make that big ass gap han jisung.” i raised my voice at him. he turned to me, wide eyed. “yes ma’am.” he said giving me a smirk.

we headed back to where the original hall connected to the hall we were just in and the elevator door was right in front of us. like it just appeared out of no where. “well that’s new.” i said as we walked up to it. “yeah, let’s hope that doesn’t happen again.” jisung laughed out as we got in. “on the next stop do you think we can sit down and take a breather?” i asked him. “yeah sure. i don’t mind taking a break at all.” he answered back. 

the doors opened up again to flat land and a singular house. we seated out, taking in our surroundings. it was like we were on a small planet, you could see a slight curve where it circled down and around. the sky was painted in a dusk night with the sun already gone and the stars starting to pop up.

“you picked a good one, y/n.” jisung pointed out as we made our way to the house. the front door was open and a room directly the right of us. a chair and a blanket on the floor. we walked a little further into the house and right there in the corner to the left was the elevator. in front of it on the other wall was a door but it was closed. jisung grabbed the door handle and twisted the knob.

“it’s locked.” he said. “did you still want to rest or did you want to just go since the elevator is right here?” he added. as much as i wanted to go, i couldn’t stand the feeling in the pit of my stomach anymore. i wanted him. right here and now. i walked up to him and placed my hands on his shoulders. i leaned my face close to his, lips barely touching. “did you forget what i told you earlier?” i asked, never breaking eye contact. i could feel his hot breath on my lips. “no.” he said, stealing a look at my lips. 

i leaned in and crashed my lips onto his, him groaning in the process. jisung’s hands went for my hips before dragging them down and to my ass. giving it a hard squeeze. i moaned into the kiss, right before pulling away with jisung chasing after my lips. i giggled and grabbed his forearm, pulling him the first open room we saw. i pressed him against the nearest wall, connecting my lips to his neck. i pushed off his jacket as i left marks on his body. i bit his collarbone, getting my hand under his shirt and pushing it up. jisung quickly threw his cap off and slid his shirt off his body. i kissed down his chest and got on my knees. unbuttoning his pants and unzipping them. i pushed them down his thighs along with his underwear. 

his cock was already halfway hard. i spat on my hand and gripped him. jisung moaned, throwing his head back onto the wall. i ran my hand up and down, my mouth watering at the sight of him. i placed the tip of his cock on my tongue and licked up the bead of pre-cum coming out. jisung looked down at me and brought his hand on the top of my head. i opened my mouth and shoved him in. taking as much as i could. 

“oh fuck y/n.” jisung said as his body tensed up from the feeling of my warm mouth. i bobbed my head back and forth, loving how heavy he felt on my tongue. i moaned around his cock. i moved my hand to his balls and played with them. jisung thrusted his hips forward, making me gag.

“sorry.” he said, pulling his cock out of my mouth. he placed his hand under my chin and tilted my head up. “you aright?” he asked with worried eyes. i nodded my head and smiled. “yeah i’m okay.” i said. “good.” he stated as he got on the floor then kicked off his shoes and pants. jisung grabbed his clothes and laid them behind me. he gently pressed me back to make me lay down.

jisung climbed over me and kissed me as he ran his hands up my body and under my shirt. i froze and grabbed his wrists, making him freeze. “you wanna leave it on?” he asked when he pulled away. “just my shirt, everything else can come off.” i shyly told jisung. “that’s fine.” jisung said with a smile. jisung sat up, running his hands down my body to my sweats. “just so you know, i think you look beautiful.” he said, admiring every curve and roll on my body. i blushed at his statement. he pulled down my sweats and off my legs, taking my shoes off too.

jisung groaned at sight of my underwear, seeing a dark patch on the material. he made eyed contact with me as he laid down. coming face to face with my cunt. jisung placed a kissed right on top of my clit then gave a bold lick, sending shock waves though my body. he hooked his finger around my underwear and pushed it to the side.

he immediately dived in and started eating me out. i threw my head back as i ached my back. my hand found his hair and tugged at it hard. the sounds of his groans vibrated my body. i whined as he pushed his tongue inside my wet hole. I clamped my thick thighs around his head.

“god, you taste so good.” jisung said, spitting on my mound. he ran his finger up my slit before pushing it in. “gotta stretch you out for my cock baby.” he said in a gravely voice, setting up a decent speed. “want you to cum all over my hand.” he said before diving back in. his tongue playing my clit again. “oh jisung!” i yelled out. my breathing picked up as his added a finger, making me clench around him. “curl your fingers up.” i whined out. jisung did exactly what i told him to do. finding my g-spot quickly. i ached my back and angled my hips even more as i felt my orgasm getting closer. making me curl my toes and my legs start to shake.

“harder.” i pleaded, needing more pressure to help me release. jisung pounded fingers hard into me with every pullback curling them up. his tongue danced around my clit as my legs started to shake. “oh fuck, i’m gonna cum!” i moaned loudly. he wrapped his lips around my clit and hummed, which sent me head first into my climax- nearly screaming jisung’s name from my lips. he slowly removed his fingers. patting my clit a few times, making me jolt.

“i love how you scream my name.” he said, sitting back onto his knees. “want more.” i said, spreading my legs out. “i want you inside me, please.” i whined. “fuck, i love that even more.” he said, scooting up so he could line his cock up with my opening. slowly pushing in as he rubbed my sensitive clit. i closed my eyes, running my hands above my shirt. gripping at my boobs. we both moaned as he bottomed out. jisung steaded himself before placing his arms under the back on my knees, holding my legs. he slowly pulled out halfway and slammed back in. 

“fuck.” i whispered. jisung’s eyes never left my body as he began to keep up the pace. watching every closely at my body and how it was jiggle and moving with each thrust. “shit, i’m not gonna last long.” he whined out, gripping my legs hard. i clenched around him at how whiny he sounded. just the sound of our skin hitting the walls of the room and loud moans from the both of us. jisung let go of my legs and laid on top of my body. his hot chest moving against my hoodie, making it come up a little. placing his hands neither side of my head. his hot breath fanning my face.

“you look so good under me. don’t wanna stop fucking this tight little cunt.” jisung said, punching a hard thrust. i wrapped my legs around his waist and arm around his back, burying my head into the crease of his neck. from this angle the pubic bone grazed my clit perfectly. i moaned feeling my second orgasm coming up fast. “gonna cum.” i whispered as i dug my nails into his back from the pleasure. jisung’s thrusts became sloppy and more rough. “me too, where should i cum?” he moaned. “inside. cum inside me, i wanna feel how much you fill me up.” i cried out, he shivered. he wrapped his right arm around the back of my shoulders, pulling my upper half even closer.

“cum with me baby.” he whined, sending a handful of hard thrusts with him pulling almost completely out, only leaving the tip in. slamming his cock deep inside one more time, shooting his hot seed around my walls. triggering my own climax, clenching around him harder than before. he rutted against me, my body feeling like pulp. i slowly released him from my grip, jisung helping me lay down my upper half. 

he sat up and grabbed his soften cock, easing it out of my sensitive hole. both hissing at the feeling. i closed my legs as jisung laid next to me so we could actual catch our breath. i looked over at jisung who was already looking at me. we broke out into smiles and laughter. he rolled over placing his arm loosely around my waist.

“when we get out of here, i wanna take you out of a date.” jisung said with a big bright smile. i felt my eyes widen and cheeks become red. “really?” i asked, making him nodded. “are you sure you want to be seen with a girl like me?” i questioned, glancing down at my bigger body. “i don’t care about that. just the type of person you are and from what i’ve learned so far. you seem like a great woman that i want to get to know more.” he said, making me blush even harder. i smiled at him then had a thought.

“what if when we get out of here we’re not together.” i said. jisung took a deep breath and placed his hand to my cheek. “then i’ll find you.” he said quietly before leaving a gentle kiss on my lips. jisung pulled away and laid back down. “come here.” he sai, opening his arms. i smiled and cuddled into him, laying my head on his chest. 

after a few minutes of cuddling, we got up and put back on our clothes. we were standing in front of the elevator. jisung turned his head to me. “ready?” he asked. “ready as i’ll ever be.” i answered back. we hopped in and watched as the doors closed. “where do you think we’ll go next?” i asked him. “well from what i remember my members telling me. we could end up in a long straight hall and a warehouse. other then those two, i don’t know.” jisung said.

the doors opened up but we weren’t completely on the level we need to be on. jisung and i looked at each other with questioning looks on our faces. jisung looked out to see what the level was. then the elevator cart jolted down a bit. jisung stumbled back into me. i grabbed ahold of his sides as we both looked at the doors. then the cart started falling, making loud screeching noises and lights going off.

“jisung!” i shouted. fear filling my body, heart pounding in my chest. jisung grabbed ahold of my arms and tried his best to face me. “grab onto my forearms y/n!” he yelled over the loud sound. i did what he said and held on tightly. “we’re going be okay!” i heard jisung said. i didn’t know what to do but scream as tears ran down my face. i tried to take a step to jisung but my body didn’t move. that’s when i realized had i closed my eyes.

i snapped my eyes open and saw that we were no longer in the elevator. i screamed out jisung’s name as i panicked. jisung opened his eyes and saw what was happening. i felt my grip of my left hand loosening and sliding down jisung’s arm. “don’t let go!” jisung screamed. “i’m trying!” i cried out as the wind started blowing faster and faster. then the wind hit us from the side, making us spin. both my hands were now at his wrists. jisung digging his fingertips into my skin.

i kept slipping from his grasp, hands to hands. jisung was using all his strength to pull me towards him the wind kept picking up. i looked at him with teary eyes the best i could. “you’ll find me!” i called out. “i promise!” jisung yelled back with tears in his eyes as well. the wind hit us once more from the other direction, making us spin hard.

that time, i lost the grip on jisung. “jisung!” i screamed. “y/n!” he screamed back but he sounded so far away. i kept spinning as the wind took me where it wanted. once i’d stopped spinning i realized i was headed straight to the ground in an alley. nonono. i closed my eyes, not wanting to see the ground getting closer. i landed on a big pile of trash bags, tumbling down them onto the concrete. landing on my side. 

“ow.” i said, looking around me and it was dark. that’s when i heard it. a car. people. a town. i shot up and looked in front of me, just to see a car pass by. “holy shit. i’m back.” i whispered. i got up from the ground and made my way out of the alley. i looked both ways before deciding to go right. i went into the nearest store and asked where i was. i’m home.

i sat in the police station waiting for my family and roommates to arrive. jisung was right about it being 2023. everything. i wouldn’t have made it back here if it weren’t for him. thank you han jisung. i can’t wait to see what you've told me about you and your group.

“y/n!” i heard my best friend called out. i looked up to see them all entering the station. “oh my god!” i said under my breath as i got up and ran to them. i hugged everyone so hard with them asking a million and one questions but being grateful that i was back and safe. “let’s go home first. what i’m going to tell you is crazy.” i told them.

later that night, in my soft bed. in my bedroom. i looked up han jisung and stray kids. jisung described them perfectly. treated each other like brothers. i listened to their music as i fell asleep.

jisung hit the trash bags, landing straight on his back. he groaned in pain of the sun as he removed himself from the stink. he looked around a saw he was in an alley. walking to the end where the street was, he saw that he was back in korea. just outside of jyp entertainment. i’m back! he ran inside the building greeting everyone who had shocked looks on their faces. but he couldn’t care less. he wanted to see is members. he ran to the elevator then stopped, turning around and heading to the stairs. he pushed himself through so many flights of stairs. he opened the hall door and ran down to the practice room, hoping his brothers would be in there. passing all his peers, like members of twice and itzy. 

he nearly broke down the door when he opened it. making everyone inside jump and look. the boys had stopped what they were doing and quickly ran to jisung, hugging him tightly.

“are you okay!”

“you’ve been gone for a full week!”

“what happened to you!”

“did someone kidnap you!”

“we were so scared!”

“one second we were behind us, next you were gone!”

“where have you been!”

jisung just cried being home again. “you’re not going to believe me when i tell you.” he said. explaining the full story, leaving out the sex part. felix and jeongin’s eyes were about to pop out of their head. “jisung, don’t lie.” minho said, rolling his eyes. felix shook his head. “how would he know about the the falling out of the sky! we never told him that.” felix explained. “or elevator failing when you come back!” jeongin added. “if you really did show us the girl.” seungmin said. “i need my phone then.” jisung said. chan quickly got up and ran over to a table, grabbing jisung’s phone.

once in his hands, he unlocked his phone and went straight to instagram. he typed in her fist and last name and she was the second account to pop up. jisung tapped on her icon and went to her profile. he clicked the first photo and noticed that it was posted just a few minutes ago. i scrolled down and looked at the date of the last photo. june 1st, 2019 was her last post. 

jisung showed the boys the proof with the photos, old comments, the article from when she first went missing, where she lives in the world, and even read the caption on her newest photo.

‘i’m back home! i won’t explain to here because it will most likely be on the news. but i can’t help but so grateful to the person i met who helped get me out. thank you so much h.j. i hope that you’re back home and safe as well and hope that we’ll meet again soon.’

after that, the boys believe him. they spent hours talking, completely forgetting about practice. just wanted to be with jisung with the rest of the day. we went out and had dinner. everyone went back to 3racha+hyunjin’s apartment, played games, and watched a movie or two. before finally calling it a night.

jisung laid in bed, staring at his phone. instagram was open once again, but this time he was trying to figure out what to type to y/n. fuck it he siad in his head.

hey, it was easy to find you. we still on for our date?

a few minutes passed before he saw someone typing…

date, time, and where.

#skz #stray kids #skz imagines #stray kids imagines #skz smut #stray kids smut #skz x you #skz x y/n #skz x stay #skz x reader #han jisung smut #han jisung x reader #han jisung imagines #han jisung #han jisung x y/n #han jisung x you #han jisung x stay #skz x thick reader #stray kids x thick reader #han jisung x thick reader

[nyaagolor]

Something that really gets me about Nemona is that despite having the social awareness of a brick wall, there are a few cases where you can see her have a complete demeanor flip if you respond negatively to her questions and I am SO interested in those. Her eyebrows furrow, she brings her hand closer to her face like she's visibly curling up, and she looks genuinely concerned-- whether ur saying you want to rain check a battle or you don't want to be her friend. It's such an extreme reaction to ultimately trivial things, but in combination with her railroading you / being her overzealous self and the way she panics about coming off too strong, it just gives me pause

I'm probably overthinking this, but those strong reactions remind of kids who were told they're Too Much by the adults in their lives and then get stuck in a push-pull of doing what comes naturally to them but also trying to be cognizant of when they're being Too Much as they struggle to grapple with social cues. Nemona only ever seeming to realize when she's crossed a line after someone tells her that explicitly or responds badly to her just gives me such confused neurodivergent teenager vibes, it is driving me insane. She acknowledges her emotional distance from other students and worries out loud to the player about Coming Off Too Strong in their first meeting, but doesn't seem to connect those ideas with any specific behavior she's doing, and the entire thing is just setting "autistic high school sophomore" alarms off in my brain

It really feels to me like a case of someone who has internalized the understanding that they're too overwhelming for others after having been told it countless times, but doesn't understand WHY; just stuck in this loop of getting negative reactions and desperately trying to work backwards from there to figure out what about them and their behavior is scaring people off. She immediately goes from this boundless confidence to insecurity (shown via pose or dialogue) the literal second she's faced with a "no" and it really makes me think it's because she's terrified of losing you as a friend and sees ur negative reactions as a precursor to that. In the absence of an actual understanding of how her own actions drive people away she's stuck relying on your reactions, and something like a simple "no" reads as a red flag that she may have crossed some invisible line that everyone else but her seems to see. (slaps her forehead) u can fit so much autism in here

#pokemon sv #nemona #the 'nemona has autism' thing isn't even a hc for me anymore it just sits at the edge of all my writing like a sleep paralysis demon #it colors how i view her so strongly that I can't really imagine her NOT being autistic #mod vex

[fungusgnat444]

Vampire König headcanons

Just a few hcs for y’all xo. The first part of the series should be done relatively soon so I thought I’d post this to keep you guys hungry lolWarnings: hes a vampire so minor mentions of blood. Nothing super intense tho. Reader is a medic/doctor so medical stuff I guess, könig being delusional and mildly creepy. I think that's it enjoy. Also almost forgot fem reader

-extremely standoffish at first. To the point where you think he probably hates you. In reality he’s obsessed; he just has no idea how to talk to women (it’s been several hundred years since he's had to “court” so he tries his best to keep you at arms length. This doesn’t work very well of course)

-before he turned his family were all poor farmers so he could never have sweet treats as a kid since suger was pretty much only for the rich at the time. So now he has a massive sweet tooth and is regularly gorging himself on sweets.

-in the 1400’s he took the alias Matthias Grunewald, moved to germany and became a painter (Matthias grunewald was a real artist. My history nerd brain couldn’t help throwing that in there. One of my favourite artists tbh)

-since you’re new to Austria he offers to teach you German just to have an excuse to talk to you but he's delusional enough to convince himself it’s to help you. Of course the first thing he teaches you is how to say König correctly. It’s just so annoying to hear you mispronounce it of course… no other reason. 

-refuses to take his mask off when you have to examine him so you have to roll it up just above his top lip. Extremely insecure about his appearance but his face in particular because of all the scars. Plus he has a cleft lip scar that he used to get bullied for.

-he has basically no friends apart from Horangi so he spends most of his time alone painting and watching old German films. His favourite is The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (its really good y’all should totally watch it btw)

-secretly collects little items you leave around the place even though he feels like a massive creep because of it. It started with a bobby pin he saw lying on your desk that he snatched while you weren’t paying attention. Now he has a whole drawer in his bedside table full of little trinkets; his favourite is a lip gloss that you had dropped one day (secretly wears it under his mask so he can feel like he’s tasting you throughout the day because he so desperately wants to kiss your pretty lips :( )

-once he opens up just a little more and you start to become friends, he slowly starts returning the items he stole because he feels too guilty. Hides them in semi-obvious places to make you think you had just misplaced them (can’t bring himself to part with  the lipgloss though)

-avoids touching you at all costs. Feels like he's having a heart attack whenever you have to examine his teeth; feeling your soft little gloved fingers brush against his lips, trying your best to be so gentle with him. Likes that you’re always so nice to him; complimenting his gum health and being so soft and praising him when you have to take venom samples from his fangs, patting his shoulder when it's down to soothe him when you’re done. In reality you’re just trying your best to make you’re patient comfortable but he savours every moment. Gets so flustered every time you compliment him, even if its something generic and medically (he starts to floss several times a day after you casually mention that he has good gums)

-hates that he can always smell you even when you wear scent blockers, its so distracting. He can always smell you approaching before he sees you, making him panic and overthink at the thought of having to interact with you.

-pretty much exclusively drinks your blood type once he finds out what it is and gets all grumpy whenever the base’s blood dispensary runs out of it. Tries his best to fast until they’re restocked. He avoids you when he’s fasting because you smell so delicious. The fact that you’re completely oblivious and still hang around him only frustrates him more.

Hehe hope you degenerates like this. First part of the series should be out soon xo

#konig #konig headcanons #konig imagine #cod konig #konig call of duty #konig cod #konig x you #cod mw2 #konig fanfiction #konig x reader #konig mw2 #mw2 #call of duty #cod #modern warfare 2 #cod mwii #vampire #vampcore