#can’t say i blame her because it was pretty lame despite being funny with the memes

[heraldofcrow]

I just woke up after pulling an all-nighter for finals and I still can’t believe this kid actually just did this at the Game Awards. I can’t believe I wasn’t hallucinating…

#what a weird and happy night #Zullie was actually mad at the kid for stealing the moment from our boys #can’t say i blame her because it was pretty lame despite being funny with the memes #i honestly don’t know what to think now lol #anyway elden ring yay #i also realized we got no dlc announcement but tbh what Miyazaki said did encourage me #i think we’ll get one soon #elden ring #game awards #memes

[princecharmingmendes]

Birthday Girl | Raul Mendes

Where Raul makes sure his girl will have the best birthday ever despite anything else

Hello everyone, pausing a bit on the Heart by Heart series (I'll be back to it Thursday as usual) to celebrate the beautiful and amazing @sinceweremutual birthday! This a small blurb/oneshot I started writing as soon as I found out her birthday was today, so I hope this was worth it. Happy Reading!

And honey, happy birthday! Hope you like it!

-*-

*Word Count: 3.5K+

*Warnings: stablished relationship, minor cursing and overly sweet Raul.

*Posted: August 15th, 2021.

-*-

Y/N loved her precious hours of sleep.

Loved the sensation of waking up and knowing she had some time to go back to bed and cuddle back into her pillows (or boyfriend if he haven’t left already). She liked sleeping in just a bit more on the weekends and taking naps after a long hard day. Last night was not an exception. Her day sucked and Raul was stuck at the hospital for a night shift, only being able to make it back home on the early hours of the morning.

They weren’t necessarily living together yet, but they’ve been together for almost two years, having known each other for a lot more than that and nowadays the pretty much were always together, but both had their own apartment, even though they’re barely separated. So she came back to his apartment since he promised he’d come as soon as he was allowed to join her in her sleep.

Her day sucked. Her boss was unnecessarily mean towards her for a mistake she did not commit and wasn’t her responsibility to make sure that wouldn’t happen. Then she had to spend the whole day fixing the other team’s mistake and it took over three hours and a bunch of paperwork, but at the end of the day she was able to figure it out. Only to receive a half assed apology, her boss blaming it on his wife’s strange behavior or whatever lame excuse he could find to put the blame on someone else.

So by the time she reached his apartment she felt dead at her feet, only having enough energy left to shower and pull on one of Raul’s hoodie over her head, burying her nose on his faint scent in the fabric, before falling onto her back in his bed and allowing herself to relax. What was supposed to be a five minute nap, ended up being the whole night, even skipping dinner in favor of resting in peace, nuzzling further into her boyfriend’s bedding.

Raul got home around 2 a.m. and found his girl asleep in his bed, holding his pillow tight to her chest and he could feel his heart swelling in his chest at the sight. He carefully dropped his things in the closet before coming out to check if she was still asleep and unperturbed with him roaming around, and his suspicious were confirmed by her steady breathing and peaceful demeanor. He decided it was best to take a quick shower before diving under the covers with Y/N and pulling her into his chest.

He was at the hospital for goodness sake.

As soon as he was out of the bathroom and back into his dark room, with only a pair of sweatpants hanging low on his hips, he plugged his phone, checking his alarms and carefully climbing onto the bed. But as soon as the mattress dipped under his weight, he noticed Y/N shifting on her side, and he stilled his movements to check if he had woken her up or was just a dream.

Y/N turned her face to his side completely, eyes still hazy and sleep clouding her senses “Baby?”

“Hi, sweetheart, it’s just me” he mumbled hovering over her with his hands planted on each side of her head to hold himself up, before he leaned down to press featherlight kissed all over her face.

“Kissy?” her voice small and soaked in sleep as she puckered her lips at him.

Raul let out a low and warm chuckle, making an involuntary smile appear in her lips as she looked up at him, feeling all fuzzy inside with the sound of his voice and the way he looked at her, before leaning down and placing a slow peck on her pout “you know you can get all the kisses in the world, my love, you don’t even have to ask” he then connected their lips again in a longer yet sweet kiss as she sighed into his mouth happily.

“Missed you” she said as soon as he pulled away, only to place his pillow back in its place so he could lay down properly, then pulling her pliant body to accommodate on top of his.

He hummed placing a kiss to her forehead as she curled her body around his, throwing a leg over his to tangle them “Missed you too, but I’m here now and you should rest, your four minutes voice message was enough for me to know you need to relax”

Y/N just nodded nuzzling her face in his neck sighing contently as he rubbed circles on her back, slowly drifting off himself as well “good night, darling, sweet dreams” he whispered into her hair but she was already asleep, but that didn’t stop her from tightening her embrace on him.

-*-

She had a peaceful night of sleep until being coaxed awake with a bunch of tiny soft kisses being placed all over her face, making her scrunch her nose before slowly blinking her eyes open. She was met with her gorgeous boyfriend hovering over her with his megawatt smile he reserved only for her shining bright. Y/N giggled softly tucking her head on the bicep on her left that was holding his weight above her. Raul couldn’t help but laugh at her.

“Good morning, birthday girl” he murmured a bit raspy as he dragged his lips across her cheek until she looked up at him with a smile on her face.

“Hm good morning” she mumbled sleepily letting her eyes fall closed.

“Oh no, don’t sleep on me” he whined and she giggled.

“I’m not sleeping, silly, just resting a bit”

Raul let out a low chuckle before kissing the tip of her nose “happy birthday, my love”

“Happy birthday indeed” she mumbled before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him down to lay on top of her.

But before he could smash her into the mattress he was quick to roll them both over “no, no sleeping again” he laughed sitting them both up with Y/N on his lap.

“Why not?” she was physically unable to stop herself from pouting.

He only smiled sympathetically at her “you made me promise you I wouldn’t let you skip work today, and that was only two days ago and I don’t break the promises I make to you”

Y/N groaned rolling her eyes “stupid past me who thought working was worth skipping a day with you when I’ll have a crowded night and won’t even properly be able to enjoy my time with you”

“Having second thoughts on your night out, sweetheart?” he asked teasingly and she nodded “well, good thing Angela texted me to tell me she’s not making it tonight so she’ll reschedule with you later”

“Really??” she asked with a smile “I know I shouldn’t sound too excited about this, but this week was so long and I needed some chill time, you and a movie would be wonderful”

He only giggled and leaned his forehead against hers “That can be arranged, darling”

“Good” she hummed gently with a smile.

“Kissy?” Raul begged with a pout but a slightly teasing tilt in his voice.

It took her a while to realize he was mocking her from last night and she felt her face burning up “oh fuck you” she said trying to leave abruptly, but his arm around her kept her pinned in his lap as he laughed.

“No, no, drop it, it was just a joke, you were just so cute last night, could never say no to you” he mumbled kissing her jaw “come in, don’t be mad at me, I’ll do that thing you like for dinner, yeah?”

“This doesn’t sound like a food offer” she said with knowing look in her eyes and he had a smirk on his lips before she had even finished her sentence, making a laugh bubble up her throat “you’re the actual worst!”

Raul threw his head back in laughter, placing a kiss on her cheeks “come on, it was just a joke, you know I’ll give you anything you’d want, doll” and his eyes were so serious and so tender she almost melted into his chest.

“Oh God, it’s barely seven in the morning, I’m barely functioning and awake, and you’re already flirting, how do you manage that?” she asked incredulously, looking at him and he just laughed shaking his head.

“Well, I can’t help it when you look like that” he mumbled leaning in closer, rubbing their noses together.

“Like what?”

“Like the love of my life” he answered like it was the most obvious thing in the planet.

And he did it so easily, not even flinching at that, leaving her speechless.

Their relationship started with teasing and mindless flirting, becoming close friends pretty quickly. He flirted with everyone without even realizing, it was just natural, and she was just good with quick funny and slightly flirty remarks they just clicked. Their friendship blurred into a serious romantic relationship so easily, everyone surrounding them rooting hot it to happen. So this wasn’t necessarily a weird situation, they’ve been like this for years, but sometimes he’d utter the sweetest confessions between the little teasings and jokes with such rawness and adoration in his eyes that she’d end up frozen in place.

He did it because it would turn things a little easier to digest and he felt better that way, wouldn’t feel so intimidated since, and Y/N didn’t mind. She knew he could be honest and serious whenever he needed, but these tiny declarations that could be fitted into a casual conversation about their grocery list always caught her off guard. And it was so genuine and spontaneous, she couldn’t help but fall even harder for him.

So she just stared at him in awe for a couple of seconds before realizing she hadn’t said anything in return, before she babbled up a “I love you too”

Raul couldn’t contain the fond smile gracing his lips before he leaned in and pressed a long yet sweet peck at her lips “wait here only a sec, yeah?”

“What? Baby, you said no surprises!” she whined but got out of his lap anyway and he only smiled at her.

“It’s not a huge surprise or anything, I promise” he said before leaving her laying in his bed.

“Of course that is the only promise he’s able to break” Y/N grumbled under her breath grumpily.

Then she heard Raul chuckle as he approached the room again “I can hear you, you know?” and she only rolled her eyes from the bed and gasping as soon as she met him by the door.

He was holding a huge breakfast tray that had absolutely all of her favorite breakfast food and a beautiful flower arrange holding her favorite ones. The smile on her face was enough to make him aware that waking up after only 4 hours of sleep were worth it, and he’d do it all over again just to see her smile like that again.

“You didn’t have to” was all she could mutter.

Raul smiled and nodded “I know, I just wanted to make your day a bit better before work, and we can celebrate later”

“Thank you” she said in a hushed tone as he placed the tray on the nightstand, and as soon as it was out of danger of suffering a strike she lunged forward wrapping him in a hug as she knocked them both on the bed again “thank you so much”

Raul laughed wrapping his arms around her waist tighter “you’re so very welcome” he said as he placed a kiss to her hair.

“I love you so much” she mumbled squeezing him just a bit tighter.

“I know, love” he said with a hand tilting her chin up look at him “but I love you so much more”

“Ew” she teased and he laughed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and shaking his head.

He snorted making her laugh “Cruel beautiful thing”

Y/N leaned down to press a kiss to his lips “good thing you love me more than” mumbling before sitting back up to eat her breakfast.

And that was how she got ready for work, with one of the best breakfasts she’s ever had in her life, and sure the food as good, but that wasn’t all of it. She was still at home, in bed and content. Then after eating through light banter and little silly jokes, Raul followed her around his room and watched her get ready for work. She had enough stuff in his house she could easily live in there for a while, since it’s where they spent most of their time. So as soon as she was ready, with her boyfriend still hot in her tracks with every move she made, trailing behind her.

“Okay” she said as she grabbed her purse “this is your day off and I know you’re up super early for this and came home super late, so please sleep”

“Why? You plan on keeping me up all night?” he teased with his signature smirk and Y/N shook her head laughing.

She gently cupped his cheeks in both of her hands “you need to sleep, doctor’s orders, honey”

“I'm the doctor here” he protested and she only shook her head in response.

“Well, I’m in control here, mister, so to bed you go”

“Fine, but I’ll pick you up, alright?” he said pressing a kiss to her forehead and she nodded “Love you”

“Love you too”

-*-

Six p.m. sharp she heard her phone buzzing softly, indicating her overly excited boyfriend was already downstairs waiting for her. So Y/N started grabbing her things, letting him know she’d be there soon, and turning off her computer for the weekend. Before she could even get up from her chair, she saw her coworker and friend, Claire running towards her with a big smile on her face.

“Your prince charming is here!” she beamed and Y/N cringed at how loud she exclaimed.

“Keep it down, people are still working” she hissed at her friend but she only rolled her eyes at her antics in response.

“Come on, don’t leave him waiting!”

She shook her head laughing softly “okay, okay, I’m leaving”

“Happy birthday, girl, enjoy your six feet boyfriend”

Y/N looked at her funny “I will, thank you? What did he say to you?”

“Just go! And text me later!” she said as she pushed Y/N into the elevator, pressing the buttons and leaving her alone.

She laughed to herself, adjusting the strap of her bag on her shoulder as she looked down at her phone, her foot tapping against the marble floor as she waited for the doors to open, and as they did, all the stress rolled off of her. Raul was standing just in front of her building wearing a beautiful button up, with a chain necklace hanging from his neck and peaking through the first opened buttons. His black shades covering his beautiful eyes and showing the reason behind his reputation of being a bad boy, when in reality he was just a softie.

But in his hands, he had another bouquet of flowers and as soon as he set his eyes on her, his face brightened up with a big smile. He was just leaning on his jeep and as she got closer he straightened his posture and took the final steps to meet her in between. He pressed a quick peck to her lips and extended the flowers to her, keeping their affection to minimum since neither of them were a fan of PDA.

“Hi there, gorgeous” she said trying to mimic his flirty tone and he only chuckled.

Raul opened the door for her “Hello, my love, ready for our birthday celebration?”

She kissed his cheek as she climbed in, bouquet on her lap as she buckled up “Is there food involved?”

“Of course, homemade and everything” he said closing the door before climbing on the drivers seat.

“Are you for real?” she asked as she turned to face him.

He only smiled starting the car, backing up and starting to drive them both to his place “Of course, could never lie to you, and it’s your favorite, even asked you grandmother for the recipe”

“Oh shit!” she squealed from her seat and he smiled at her nodding “you have to be kidding me”

“You can call her” Raul said teasingly “Or you could trust your very honest and loving boyfriend, both pretty simple options”

Y/N laughed shaking her head “you’re absolutely ridiculous”

“But you love me” he quickly added and she couldn’t stop herself from laughing harder.

“Of course I do, silly, it’s impossible not to when you’re literally being the best human being I’ve ever met and always making sure I’m happy” she said looking at the flowers on her lap before looking up at Raul.

“Stop it, you’re gonna make me cry” he teased and she shook her head with a giggle “I just want to make you happy, promised it to your mom and myself”

“And you’re acing this” she said and he grabbed her hand, planting a kiss on the back of it before parking on the garage of his building.

“Baby, before we go back home, could you please grab me my wallet, I think it's one the glove compartment” he mumbled grabbing his phone probably to reply to someone’s text.

And she did, but she was not expecting what she saw.

Inside the glove compartment there were a bunch of polaroids of them and rose petals scattered around, and right on the back of it there was a little key hanging under the phrase ‘move in with me, please?’ written in his calligraphy. She was still processing the whole thing when he cleaned his throat slightly nervous, making her look up at him with wide eyes and still not sure what to say.

“I know this is your birthday, and this is technically a gift for me, but I really couldn’t wait another day” he said softly, seemingly shyer than his usual confident self, making her heart swell twice its size in her chest.

“Raul, I- yeah, yes, of course I’ll move in with you!” she practically jump on him as much as she could due to the fact that they’re still in his car and space was limited.

Y/N was quick to capture his lips in a searing kiss and she felt him relax under her touch, tucking her bottom lip between his two, a hand cupping her face as the other held her waist to give her some sort of support on the pose she had. She backed way to recover a bit of breath she didn’t think she would need when she lunged forward to her boyfriend, so instead the pecked his lips only about a million times, making him laugh and press one long kiss to her lips then leaning away completely.

“Glad you agreed to it, cause I already told your parents” he said a bit nervous about it, a sly smile gracing his features to match his rosy cheeks.

“Of course you did” she said with a smile “what about yours? Are they okay with it?”

“Are you kidding me?? Mom wanted you to move in like three years ago” he said as he grabbed the key and the photos from the glove compartment “sorry, sweetheart, this is actually symbolic since you already have a key and this is actually mine”

“Figured” she laughed as she grabbed her stuff “And what do you mean three years ago? We weren’t even officially together back then”

Raul shrugged “guess that’s a mom thing, she said something about having never seen me this happy before and she was sure we were in love with each other, turns out she was right, I already loved you back then and didn’t want to admit it, and yeah, you make me the happiest man alive, sweetheart”

“You're absolutely ridiculous but I still love you” Y/N admitted and he smiled at her.

“I know” he opened his door “your real present, meal and a few other stuff are waiting for you upstairs”

“Oh my God, you really went all in” she giggled getting out of the car, and as soon as she was out, he was quick to pick her up bridal style making her squeak “what the hell are you doing?”

He looked down at her, taking a while to cal the elevator “Isn’t this how we’re supposed to do it?”

“Baby, I’m sure it’s only the door, not all the floors and we’re not married” she said with a giggled

“Well, miss skepticism, just let me be a goofball once in a while” he said with a mocking tone.

“Once in a while?” she asked incredulously.

He had a pout on his lips when he spoke up again “Come on, no teasing when I’m trying to be a hopeless romantic, please let me do this and treat you right” he said with a smile

“Alright, whatever you want” she admitted in defeat as she giggled, wrapping her arms around her neck “just don’t drop me, please”

“Would never, sweetheart”

-*-

*Please reblog or like this post if you liked it so I’ll know.

*I’m sorry if there are any spelling mistakes.

*Please do not repost this without giving me the credit, this is a completely original piece and I do not give permission to copy this!

*Hope you guys enjoyed it!

*xoxo

-🌙

#shawn mendes #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes writing #the mendes triplets #raul mendes #raul mendes writing #raul mendes au #the mendes triplets au #mendes triplets #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fan fic #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes x y/n #shawn mendes x you #raul mendes x reader #writing

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Suicide Squad Team A

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS! Seriously, as soon as you click that read more, you’re gonna be smacked with SPOILERS! Don’t say I didn’t give you ample warning this time!)

The world’s in danger yet again, and Amanda Waller is in need of some expendable forces to take on some dirty jobs in the name of preserving peace. Last time she did this, it seems like she hired the wrong people. Nice guy Will Smith Deadshot? Bland, boring Killer Croc? El Diablo, who became attached to a bunch of reprobates after spending a couple hours with them? The only one who was useful in that squad was Katana. She had their backs, could cut all of them in half with one sword stroke just like mowing the lawn, and her sword traps the souls of its victims. Unfortunately, she was decidedly not expendable, so what is a girlboss like Waller to do?

Easy: Assemble a brand new squad of criminals to do the dirty work. Harley and Boomerang are the only ones she brought back, because let’s be real, they’re the only ones we give a damn about. Filling out the rest of the squad are the stoic, craggy crackshot Savant; the handsome, German spear-thrower Javelin; the alien warrior Mongal; the frothing, psychotic animal Weasel; the confident and all-powerful TDK; and Blackguard, who is literally just a guy. Together, this team gets deployed to Corto Maltese to do what no one else can do, and with skills like theirs, they are absolutely unstoppable!

They all fucking die before the opening credits.

Motivation/Goals: Considering the goal of the squad is to shave time off their prison sentences by going on the mission, it’s ostensibly the reason every single one of these goons accepted the job. Savant and Weasel are pretty well established in this regard; we get to focus on Savant for much of the opening, so we can get a sense of him, and Weasel is stated to have murdered no less than 27 children. So, yeah, they need to do this mission.

The rest, though? Who knows! Why are Mongal, Javelin, and TDK in prison? How did they even get an alien like Mongal? What did they do to land in the position they’d need to go on a suicide mission? Why doesn’t this movie have flashy, intrusive cards explaining everything to us in a throwaway gag in a montage?!

Blackguard, at least, has some other motivation. He sold out the entire squad to the military of Corto Maltese, which is why they’re ambushed. Now, there’s actually some ambiguity here: Did he do this of his own volition, and was this a complete surprise, or is it, as it is heavily implied, all part of Waller’s plan and she let this happen as a diversion for the other team to get in unnoticed?

Honestly, though, it doesn’t matter what their goals are. They’re all dead within five minutes of the movie starting, with one exception.

Performance: So, the reason these guys are even worth talking about is because, despite their minuscule screentime, all of their actors manage to cram in enough humor and characterization that they’re all pretty fun and likable. Michael Rooker is as stony and stoic as ever as Savant (until he hilariously isn’t), Flula Borg’s Javelin is really sweet and charming in his interactions with Harley, and Pete Davidson’s Blackguard is just amazingly douchey and pathetic. Special mention goes to Nathan Fillion’s TDK, who has an utterly endearing and unwavering faith in his astoundingly crappy ability to… detach his arms. It’s honestly kind of beautiful. Then there’s Weasel as portrayed by Sean Gunn, who is just a hilarious crackhead of an animal man.

Final Fate: Literally every single one of them die horribly thanks to Blackguard’s betrayal. He’s the first to go, because as soon as he walks out saying “Hey guys, it’s me, the one who contacted you!” he literally has his face blasted clean off. The rest go soon after. Mongal, in one of the most astounding moments of idiocy I’ve ever seen, leaps on a helicopter despite Rick Flag telling her specifically not to. Her weight and strength send it careening out of control, which leads to it shredding Captain Boomerang to bits before exploding, burning her alive as she painfully screams and writhes in agony. TDK gets his arms shot into Swiss cheese, leading to him bleeding out since even detached they still are part of him. Javelin is also shot, but gets a dying moment with Harley where he passes her Checkov’s Javelin. Finally, after witnessing all of this carnage, Savant completely loses his shit and tries to swim away, leading to Waller blowing his head up.

You may be wondering what happened to Weasel. He appears to drown as soon as the Squad deploys, because despite being actually smart in this movie, Waller forgot to make sure everyone on the Squad could swim. Thankfully, this lovable child-murdering crackhead rodent was just sleeping, and wakes up in the first credit scene.

Best Scene: Obviously, it’s their one and only scene. It’s a magnificent slaughter that puts the X-Force scene from Deadpool 2 to shame.

Final Thoughts & Score: I’ve gotta hand it to James Gunn. Even though these losers are only onscreen for a few minutes, they all get to cram a lot of charm and personality into that time, to the point it’s actually kind of sad seeing them all die. It’s a beautiful mix of comedy and tragedy. Since their screentime is so limited, though, I’m mostly going to be grading them on style, performance, and so on rather than on villainy like normal. They are all bad guys, as they don’t really get a chance to redeem themselves like the other Squad, so I’m still counting them as villains, which means they could potentially score above an 8 (which is the highest score I’m willing to give heel-face turn villains, because they end up being better as characters in general than as villains).

I’m also not going to talk about Boomerang (I’ll talk about him when I review the original Squad) or Harley (because she not only lives, but deserves her own solo Psycho Analysis). Now here we go, from best to worst:

TDK

If you thought anyone but TDK would get top marks, you’re sadly mistaken. Seeing Nathan Fillion proudly wield the insanely lame power to detach his arms to lightly tap soldiers on the head and gently grab their guns is a sight I never knew I needed to see until this movie. The fact he just seems so darn proud about this power that he doesn’t even bother to use in any way that would be remotely useful is honestly really endearing. Frankly, the sheer fact they adapted Arms-Fall-Off Boy in any way is enough for me to give him a 10/10.

Weasel

Weasel is just disgustingly delightful. He’s just a horrible, nasty, ugly little bastard… But he’s kind of adorable? He clearly has no idea where he is at any given time and is just so goddamn freaky that I can’t help but love him. The fact that, despite being a character who in the comics is noteworthy only for dying on his first mission with the Squad, he manages to survive the entire movie is pretty impressive. Hopefully he comes back in the future, but either way he gets an 8/10 from me.

Javelin

Honestly, aside from Boomerang, his death stung the most. He’s just so cute and charming, and he doesn’t even get to fling his javelin at anyone! Thankfully, he passes it on to Harley, and boy does she ever get to use it! He’s so cute, I have to give him an 8/10. I just wish we got more of him.

Savant

Savant is just an absolutely hilarious bait-and-switch. We follow him through the prologue, with everything seeming to point to him as our main character and the Squad leader. He’s stoic, he’s cranky, and he has impeccable aim… and then we get to the beach and he just freaks the hell out and starts screaming and crying and running away like a little bitch. Seeing Michael Rooker act like he’s shitting his pants after playing a badass like Yondu is just the sort of hilarious subversiveness that James Gunn loves to do when you let him loose. The fact that he looks like, to paraphrase the TVTropes YMMV page for the movie, a “cyberpunk Tommy Wiseau” is the icing on this 7/10 cake.

Blackguard

I was prepared to hate this guy just based on how lame Pete Davidson’s costume was, and you know what? I do hate him. But I love to hate him. He’s just an utterly pathetic scoundrel and a coward, true to his name. The fact he is the first to die, as just about everyone predicted, and is killed absolutely gruesomely makes any annoyance he could provide moot, and his freeakout over being seated next to Weasel on the plane is actually kind of funny. I was originally going to give him a 6, but you know what? He can have a low 7/10. He’s like the only member of this particular Squad to actually do anything evil, so I gotta give him props for that.

Mongal

Let me make this perfectly clear: I do not blame James Gunn or actress Mayling Ng. I’m not actually mad at either of them for what they chose to do, because it is ultimately hilarious and sad. It suited the narrative of the film, and I’m not actually, genuinely mad.

With all that out of the way, Mongal is one hell of a stupid cunt. It is one thing to cause your own death with your stupidity, it is something else entirely to cause the death of a beloved character with your poorly planned attack. The fact she didn’t take into account how her weight and strength would effect an airborne helicopter makes one wonder if she is really supposed to be based on a character who can take on Superman and live to tell about it.

Let’s compare her to two similar characters to really show how bad she is. Like Blackguard, she is directly responsible for a death on the beach, Blackguard being responsible for everyone by selling them out and leading them into an ambush (and yes, I’m including him as well), and Mongal killing Boomerang with the chopper. The difference is, Blackguard’s betrayal was deliberate, he meant to sell the team out, he was actively doing something evil there, while Mongal killed Boomerang out of sheer idiocy.

Now, let’s compare her to Zeitgeist from the similar bloody massacre that occurred during X-Force’s deployment in Deadpool 2. Like Mongal, he accidentally kills a teammate. The difference is, in the case of Zeitgeist, he only accidentally melted Peter, it was a freak accident, and ultimately it does get undone by the end. Meanwhile, Mongal made a conscious, stupid decision and ended up killing her squadmate with her own idiocy. She sucks, hardcore. I don’t do this lightly, but I’m giving her a 1/10. Villains just don’t get much stupider than her.

I will giver her this, though: the makeup work on her is good. She’s lowkey kinda hot if I’m being honest. But being hot and having good makeup does not a good villain make.

#Psycho Analysis #The Suicide Squad #Savant #Michael Rooker #Javelin #Flula Borg #TDK #Nathan Fillion #Weasel #Sean Gunn #Mongal #Mayling Ng #Blackguard #Pete Davidson

[zuffer-weird-girl]

What about a fluff scenario when kai and his s/o both were out on the street when they were kids and pops took kai in and not his s/o so kai helped her out while she was still on the street until one day she stop coming to their spot. Kai in his early 20s and going to a meeting with pops and saw his s/o. She is the same but she's an highly skilled assassin and could kill you in an blink of an eye. (I can't figure out an ending😢😡)

"I found some food!" He flinched at your scream before seing you, upside down... hanging from a tree on the park you two usually met.

"You dont even know if that's safe to eat." He mumbled with a stoic face as you giggled, jumping perfectly back down.

"Bla bla bla you always need to make sure not to get sick, bla bla bla-!" You tried to mimicked his voice, smiling widely at the annoyed look he gave to you before snatching the fruit out of your hand.

"You're such a pain.." he mumbled whiel rubbing the fruit on the cleanest parts of his shirt... he knew it wouldn't clean although he could at least fool his pickup stomach enough.

"Oi!" You exclaimed with a mouthful "I am the pain who got yourself some food okay?!"

"Forgot about that part since it isn't always necessary." He smirked at the extremely offended look you had on as he took one careful bite out of the fruit-

He gasped as you tackled him on the ground with some screams as you two fought to at least mantain some balance... yet both of you rolled on the ground like cats playing on the mud. And just when he fought he won you pinned him on the ground as he let out a "oof" when his head hitted the grass.

"You're the worst on fights Chisaki~" you playfull teased him as he pushed you away from him with a huff as you laughed.

"I rather much prefer the nicknames you gave me than this stupid surname." He mumbled while patting himself as you got up with a frow but smiled.

"So I am THAT close to you to call you by your first name? Kai?" You singed his name and muffled your laugh as the pale cheeks of Chisaki started to flush.

"You are most like my only company. Unfortunately..." you scoffed as you got up with crossed arms.

"Since is such a pain to be my side then why do you follow me around huh?"

"Experience on the streets. You have those while I am still... learning." He muttered as you scoffed again. Such a lame excuse to being around you... Kai couldn't lie even he wanted to...

"Yeah yeah right. I'm going to search some food since after that play fight we pretty much lost it..."

"And whose fault is that?" He arche done of his eyebrows up as you poked your tongue at him.

"I will be back soon."

He nodded as you trailed off... although the least he could have expected it was to appear a man to offer him a home... a place to stay...

He was so shocked that for one moment he fprgoted about you... The old man said he was going to get the car just when he was about to ask if you could come along as well...

"So you got the locks now." He widened hsi golden eyes and turned around to see you smiling sadly at him.

"I will ask him if you-" you lifted your hand up with a shake of your head.

"No Kai. The man choosed you. So only you will go."

He furrowed his eyebrows before hearing the man calling for him. He turned his gaze back at you to see you were already walking away.

"I will help (Y/n)!" You stopped on your track and turned to him, with a determined look on his golden eyes "Just meet me on our usual spot and I will help! Just like you did for me, I own you!"

You frowned and smiled, before letting out one of the sweetest laughs he ever heard.

"You dont own me anything. But I will accept that!"

With that you walked away as he felt the man's hand on his shoulder to call him.

.

..

.

.

.

He sighed as he stared at the streets pacing by as he and Pops were sitted on the car. The last time he saw (Y/n) was only a few weeks after Pops took him in... it passed more than ten years since he searched that damn city for you...

It's funny how you never seemed to dissapear from his mind... ever time he passes by your meeting spot, he feels a ache on his chest yet a hidden feeling of hope to just see you back... waiting for him.

He blamed himself for it... he should had been more persistent on taking you back with him to the yakusa... you would have a better life than that oen you had.

"We're here." Pops voice broke out of his thoughts as the old man patted his shoulders "Try to not kill anyone, for our sake yeah?" It was meant as a joke but it came out as a scolding.

Pops would never leave it down his... outbursts on fights for the Shie Hassaikai.

They entered the underground ring and he cringed at how dirty it was that place... blood, sweat, tears, drool, food you name it. All sprawled out on the floor.

Pops sitted down on a table as he mentioned for Kai to stay back as the elders talked and he traveled his gaze around the place in judgement...

"So what about that my fella?"

"I dont rhink is a good idea. My son can be quite... harsh when it comes to these things." Pops muttered while eyeing Kai with a scowl.

"Dont worry buddy. My jewel can pretty much face your kiddo." The man with a cigarette spoke between chuckles as Pops made a thoughtful face before looking at Kai whose only sighed and nodded, already taking his jacket off.

"If your man there defeat then you will have our partnership."

"For sure. But this will happen on a secluded place. We're not animals." Pops spoke on a harsh tone as the other man laughed but nodded.

Kai only scowled at the audacity of the other male as he followed them and listened to Pops instructions on to NOT use his quirk to kill his opponent.

He was tired of listening to those rules.

He entered the place and it was quiet as Pops took his seat and the other elder took his. For a moment he was sure that it wasn't going to happen anything before he dodged with a grunt a chain that came on his way.

A woman with a metal mask covering half of her glace appeared as she dropped from the ceiling and glared at him through her hair.

He mantained on guard yet was eyeing her like she was no other than a piece of dirt.

She came at him running before he grabbed the chains on his gloved hands and twisted them around to cage her and throw his opponent in the air.

"Not so smug now huh?" He muttered to himself before tsking at how easily she freed herself from hsi grasp and landed on the ground on a crouched position.

E blocked her punchs and kicks easily despite from how fast she was being. It didn't even sounded like she even needed sto take a breath.

He used his quirk on the ground to push her all the way and cage her on the wall by the construction. For one second he thought it was all over before a explosion happened and his barrier of concret were broken as she took a knife out of her pocket.

"What's is the meaning of this?!" Pops shouted at his partner whose only laughed.

"Everything is fair on the wat my friend!"

Chisaki only scoffed and dodged all the attacks she made, wincing at when she actually manage to cut his cheeks as he lost his patient and grabbed on her wrist, already preparing to use the overhaul. Although on a moment of distraction when he pinned her down she kicked him so hard on the guts that he coughed as she was pinning him on the ground now, his head hitting teh concret with a grunt... her weapon discarded far away since he kicked.

Only one person would be able to do all of this and not provoke any hives to break out from his skin...

And staring with wide eyes better, he noticed the color of her eyes... (E/c) bright ones...

"(Y/n)?" He panted as he noticed her surprise on her feautures as she unthighten her grip on him and slowly got a bit away from him.

She arched one eyebrow at him, her face was only readable because of her eyes and the way her eyebrows moved.

Still on the ground. He got half of his body up, eyes still wide as the elders asked what was happening.

She slowly took off her mask and thoughts were confirmed. The one he was fighting was (Y/n)...

"Do I... know you? No one calls me that unless..." she slowly got up from him and maintained a safe distance as he grunted while getting up.

"Can't recognize me I see." He sighed, regret could come later as he slowly took his mask off and looked at her features widening in shock. "Kai Chisaki, ring any bells to you?"

It was silence for a bit before you gasped with a laugh and almost tackled him on the ground again if it wasn't from him being prepared this time.

"Oh my GOD! Is that really you?!" You shouted while hugging him as he awkwardly lowered his arms down to give you a proper hug.

"I could ask the same? What happened? You look so different than I remember!" He chuckled wearily as you gave out a hearted laugh, one he missed to hear.

"I could say the same thing to you! Look at how you got! The bony boy I met didn't had those muscles!" You circles around him before stopping and muttering "and such a nice package..."

He scoffed, ignoring the forming blush before twirling around to meet your gaze.

"More impulsive than you used to be, I see." You laughed before noticing the two elders entering, Pops with a confused as heck face as teh other opened his arm in confusion.

"The hell is going on here?"

"Chisaki my boy, you know this lady?"

"The girl I searched for years." He showed his palm at you "Is her, (Y/n)"

"Ah, lovely reunion between two killers. How adorable." You two let out confused noises before looking at eachother.

"You killed someone? You? Whose is scared of cockroaches?" He asked in disbelief and arrogance as you furrowed your eyebrows with crossed arms.

"(Y/n) happens to be one of my favorite and best assassins." The man spoke as Pops furrowed his eyebrows.

"So that's why we couldn't find her. You never reveal your assassins names to anyone, not even bussines neither of partners." Pops spoke as the man nodded.

As the elders talked they stopped to see you two, Pops smilling as the other furrowed his eyebrows at the way Chisaki looked at you and you looked back...

Oh, they can tell how this is going to end by only seing the two old friends reuniting...

#overhaul imagine #overhaul scenario #overhaul x reader #overhaul #overhaul chisaki kai #chisaki kai x reader #chisaki kai #bnha villains x reader #bnha villains #bnha fanfiction #zuffer writings

[popculturebuffet]

House of Mouse: Max’s Embarrassing Date Review

Hello House Mouses and welcome back to the house of mouse. Another comission by Kev and my second House of Mouse for the valentine’s season. This time we’re not tackling a Valentine’s Episode necesarily, but a romantic one all the same as fan faviorite couple Max and Roxanne finally go on a date.  I always liked Max. Even as a kid when I wasn’t the biggest fan of “A Goofy Movie”, didn’t like the darker patches like the principals office scene or the Pete Hot tub scene.. though in hindsight both had legit greviances with Max... it just dosen’t make either less terrible as the principal still told an innocnet man who wasn’t responsible for what his kid did and was trying his best that his son was going to become a crminal because of one stupid but mostly harmless prank, and Pete.. is just an abusive, unlikeable and unlovable ass in both Goof Troop and Goofy Movie, and I hate how he treats his son, don’t blame his wife for leaving him or taking their daughter and dog, and am really sad he got custody of PJ somehow. And for the record this isn’t ALL petes, just this version. The rest are fine and just the right level of asshole. 

Point is despite my problems with the first film, I had none with the second and even now I like it due to having some really good ideas and concepts while also being gloirously rediclous due to the loveably dated X-Games element. While I do have a spot in my heart for the Dana Hill and Shaun Fleming versions, especially the latter once upon a christmas is awesome, Jason Marsden’s version is the best by the mile having the right amount of ego mixed with self doubt to make him likeable enough to brook him being an ass to his dad a lot. He’s a good character.. and it baffles me Disney NEVER uses him nowadays. No really, the last time he showed up was in twice upon a christmas and no one liked that because he was dating someone who wasn’t Roxanne just to rehash the same plot they’d already rehashed better in Extremley Goofy Movie. I REALLY need to rewatch that one. Hmm.... gonna see if I can squeeze that one into May or later in April. That’s for another time. 

But yeah while he’s at one of the disney parks, that’s it. The character just .. vanished, and hasn’t been brought back in any way shape or form. Though I could see either a Disney Plus reboot of goof troop or a goofy movie with max having his own kids. That could be intresting. Also bring Roxanne back as weirdly this episode i’m reviewing, a goofy movie and now her ducktales cameo are her ONLY apperances. 

Seriously I get she’s not the most fleshed out.. but then flesh her out. Like Max she’s crminally underused and while I get her absence as a character in the sequel, the plot really didn’t need her, he still could’ve been dating her off screen. Though clearly the two worked things out and tried again as this episode came out AFTER extremely did. But did this episode work out? Join me under the cut to find out. 

As i’ve decided is my standard for House of Mouse Episodes, shorts first, then wraparound, then Mickey Mouse live sex celebration. Though I will say i’ve picked up there are two kinds of formats for the show: They either use two of the longer Mouseworks shorts or just one close to 11 minute short, a medium one, and one of the little two minute segments. There might be a break from this in the future, we shall see but for now those ar ethe two standards. This time we have two longer shorts. 

Pluto’s Penthouse Sweet: 

I’ve mentioned in the past I dont’ really get why Pluto is part of Disney’s sensational six along with Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Goofy and Daisy. And I stand by that: While he’s had his own cartoons they just aren’t as entertaining and creative as MIckey’s or hilarous and relatable as Donald and Goofy’s. He’s just an average cartoon dog. He works fine in tandem with Mickey, but on his own he’s just nothing and his spot should be taken by pete, who while not a goodie all the time, again the goof troop version needs to step on a rake and fall into a well.. somehow. i didn’t think my insult through. Point is pete is better.  And this short isn’t BAD .. but to me it’s what some fans THINK the disney shorts are: Bland, maybe one or two good jokes but almost nothing new or intresting. As I found out last year, that’s far from the case, as a lot of the Donald shorts are still hilarious today and a lot of the mickey shorts are shockingly creative, like Thru The Mirorr where he goes .. well thru the mirror into a wonderland like world where all the inanaimate objects are alive and he can shrink and what not via astral projection, or Mickey’s Mechanical Man, which I sadly didn’t know about when I did the MIckey Birthday Special and for some reason isn’t on disne plus. In it Mickey creates a robot and has it box a monsterous looking gorillia. 

How has Mickey piloting this thing but giant sized against various kaiju been a thing yet? And if it has someone tell me. Seriously with all the comics and animated series how. I’d even settle for a Wonderful World of Mickey Mouse episode. Just bring this guy back. Point is there was far more invetnion than it seemed.. at least at first as it slowly died out as they went by the late 50′s. But Pluto just seemed even in their hayday like your standard pet gets into antics thing without the creative slapstick of tom and jerry or the likeablity of sylvester who never could get that asshole Tweety Bird. This is just weak sauce and whiel I could forgive the older shorts, as their from another time and likely lead to say Tom and Jerry... I can’t forgive this which was made probably in 1998 and released in 1999 originally. Comedy had evolved a LOT by that point and unlike the Goofy how to shorts, which are a format that is immortal and still evolved to match the times and felt fresh, these just feel stale and boring and like the last Pluto short I covered this one was a chore to sit through though not nearly AS bad. 

Still though the premise is about the same, Pluto’s left to his own devices, and finds a female dog, though in this case she’s VERY intrested in him. I”m also not entirley convinced she’s a dog, but instead one of Jumba’s experiments and that Lilo and Stitch later had to journey to.. wherever these shorts take place to fetch him. Or more likely the house of mouse. I mean Proud Family, Recess, American Dragon Jake Long and Kim Possible all take place int hat universe, why can’t house of mouse? Also tell me you wouldn’t watch an avengers style team consisting of Kim, Ron, Jake, Penny, Probably TJ, Lilo, Stitch and Donald Duck. If you wouldn’t i’d call you a liar because you would be. 

Seriously the eyes give her away.... just look at them. Very experimenty. But before Pluto can do it like they do on the discovery channel he has to get past the guard dog.. though how he does produces the one great gag of the short, as he BUILDS A GIANT, TROJAN HORSE ESQUE PLUTO OUT OF JUNK. Just holy shit that’s awesome> It gets him inside, only for him to find his lady friend is a bit TOO affectionate and he has to escape, he does so, and MIckey wonders if he missed him etc lame button. This short was a vacuum of comedy outside of GIANT PLUTO. Seriously where’s my disney giant mecha series. YOu have five main characters, and Pluto among with MANY, MANY side characters, frmo scrooge to the boys to hopefully Della, to even possibly pete and mortimer who could have their own mech against the heroes but maybe join them in the last episode. Maybe max and pj could have some, have a father vs son thing with PJ and Pete. I”m just saying, i’d watch it. I know my nieces would watch it. I know my nephews would watch it. Greenlight it. Or i’ll make it.. somehow. 

How to Ride a Bike: Speaking of the How To Shorts, as usual for the House of Mouse era ones.. this was awesome, pretty much what you’d expect, some goofy, pardon the pun, gags about goofy riding a bike and then a fun climax of him in a bike race. Not a ton to add, other than that hamster bike above is genius. Just needs some tweaking. Really funny, really simple, and really good as you’d expect from a good Goofy Short. Easily the best part of the episode. 

Max’s Embarrassing Date: So this was a disapointment. Like i’d try to be nice.. but I had high hopes given this brought Roxanne back, and while the premise was stock maybe they’d do something funny with with it. 

But no the plot is pretty standard, very predictable and fairly obnoxious. Max has a date with Roxanne, and is playing it cool and what not, but is worried his dad will find out.. which he somehow did offscreen. Probably Clarabelle.. I mean they do go out sometimes in this one, wouldn’t surprise me. 

So Max pleads with the rest of the HOM staff to keep him away because he fears his dad will overdo things, which.. is fair and one of the few things I like> He dosen’t want him to overdo it on the mood because this is well.. a first date. He dosen’t want to pressure her or himself and just wants it to be nice and calm. The problem is it’s framed like him once again being embarassed by his dad and having to learn better.

At this point we’d had TWO movies do this already, one of which was only two years old at the time of this episode. This plot is stale as old toast even if it dind’t have goofy in it. And the twist is predictable: the HOM crew end up also overdoing it: Minnie comments on how cute they are and wants candles brought, Daisy gets them a bigger table forgetting how dates work,t hough we do get a great gag of hte 7 dwarves stacked, and Mickey while having .. some.. gopher? I honestly can’t tell who it was, usually i’m better at the cameos. Speaking of which they also have a runner of beast going on a date with Cruella Devile. 

I mean is he cheating on his wife? Is she holding his wife hostage? Is this before belle because we see a post transfomratoin beast too so maybe the House of Mouse is an intersection of space and time? That’s.. actually the most resonable answer I can think of honestly and when i’m focusing more on how the hell your gag works than how funny it is, you clearly failed somewhere along the line. 

Point is Mickey puts his good friend in a pothole, and not only calls max little max, which while an understnadably close family thing to do is still embarassing, but also takes pictures while their eating the spagetthi.. which i’m 100% sure was Huey’s idea nad had Mickey not interrupted, would’ve been tied up down the middle for a lady and the tramp thing. It’s his signature move. Well that and having a panic attack. That’s also one of mine the others being lettterkenny refrences and sex jokes about disney characters.  But yeah this just.. dosen’t work. Them being as embarassing? that’d be fine.. if they weren’t wholly unsympathetic for not only keeping their friend from WELL INTEITONEDLY trying to help his son on his date, something his son shold have no problem with since ROXANNE’S MET HIM. AND IS FINE WITH HIM. AND NEVER CARED ABOUT YOU BEING HIS SON LIKE THE DICKHEADS AT SCHOOL. MINUS BOBBY WHO YOUR FRIENDS WITH FOR SOME REASON. My point is this plot bothers me a lot, and it makes the mickey crew come off like assholes for doing this to thier friend instead of just talking to him like a person. Especially since only ONE of them is a parent and Conviently donald is mostly absent. Likely because he realized this was going to end badly and just agreed to tie the spagetthi like huey taught him to keep his involvment in this shit show and gaslighting his best friend to a minimum. 

Eventually Mickey takes things a step too far and has Sebastian almost sing kiss the girl. Max cuts him off though yelling that he just wants them to back off, he just wants them to relax and he TOLD them this, which makes them come off worse as they KNEW he didn’t want this and did it anyway and never apologize becaue apparently the first rule of house of mouse is never apologize for anything, huh huh. Goofy naturally steps in, tells them off and agrees to serve them and Roxanne finds him entertaining and gives him a nose kiss for being a good dad. He’s a good guy that Goof.  Roxanne then whispers something in max’s ear at the end of the date... which gives him an audible erection. No really. And given his age is vauge here I’m suddenly super duper uncomfortable so let’s move on. 

So max tells them she liked it and wants to come back.. 100% sure that wasn’t what she said but what she said isn’t fit to print and you’ve seen what i’ve said and what I put in the we’ll be right back. Point is he’s happy, though Mickey says we’ll try to make it extra special next time. Mickey.. did you do a space mountain’s worth of pills and cokea nd just forget the entire evening? Did you take some of those hangover roofies/ Why would you do that? Was that pete’s new plan to steal the house of mouse? To drug you guys and make you forget you already paid the rent? Did PJ stop him? Inquiring me wants to know. 

Final Thoughts: Yeah this wasn’t a very good episode. Roxanne is wasted despite having a suitable replacment Roxanne voice in Grey Delise, with no real depth just to rehash the plot of the first and second goofy movies. And this one didn’t have an inexpilicable beatnik cafe, PJ getting laid and finally being happy for once, a standard college fraternity plot  surgeically infused with an out of nowhere obession with xtreme sports that was nowhere in the first film, Goofy in an afro, Goofy finding love, That disco sequence, and a climax in which Goofy carries Brad Garret out of a fire, then Brad Garret probably kills the villian of the film who certainly deserved it. My points are this episode was an underwhelming rehash only saved by some good shippy moments and a good goofy short. It was weak, not all that funny, and not all that intersting.  My other point is that an extremley goofy movie is awesome and also kinda insane and I love it for that. I’m glad I saw this one but i’m really disapointed in how bleh it was. Next time I visit the house of mouse is.. actually in a few days as Pete Does a One Man Show. So yeah already 100% better just by having THAT musical number in it, see you then and if not, there’s always another rainbow. 

#house of mouse #max goof #roxanne #the goofy movie #max x roxanne #goofy goof #goofy #donald duck #mickey mouse #minnie mouse #daisy duck #cruella de vil #beast #disney #comissions

[dweetwise]

have a semi-rushed riconti one shot because i couldn’t not write them for valentine’s day 💕

ship: ace x felix warnings: none word count: 4180

The problem with secret admirers

Holidays usually weren't something the survivors had the luxury of celebrating.

The occasional seasonal decorations in trials along with some ridiculous, thematical outfits seemed more like a sign of their Eldritch captor's morbid sense of humor than evidence of the passing of time. But sadly, lacking calendars and all, it was the most accurate estimate they had.

So when the Entity plopped down some fireworks and talismans on the generators to proclaim the Chinese new year, it barely affected any of them.

Yui and Feng seemed more on edge than usual, the decorations crude imitations of the festivities they were used to back home. Adam had told the group about the year of the ox and the Chinese zodiac, the teacher donning a new hoodie he’d received for the occasion.

For Ace, the holiday meant nothing more than looting as many firecrackers as he could manage, along with making questionable “horny” jokes to the few killers that had received ox-themed outfits.

But in the midst of the survivors' celebration or lack thereof, they'd completely forgotten about another well-known February celebration.

When Ace returns from a successful trial and goes to stash yet another firecracker into his generous collection of items, he immediately notices something that doesn't belong.

Inside the trunk, on top of the organized chaos that is his pile of items and add-ons, lies a note.

Curiously unfolding the piece of paper, Ace makes out somewhat messy handwriting on a worn piece of paper.

'Your smile lights up the room'.

“Oh, ha ha, very funny,” Ace says, turning to face the small group of survivors by the campfire.

“Huh? What's up?” Steve perks up, others following suit and turning to watch the spectacle.

“Someone left me a little prank note,” Ace says, rolling his eyes and flicking the slip of paper over his shoulder.

“What?” Claudette says with a frown, immediately reaching for the discarded note.

“What does it say?” Cheryl asks curiously, coming up beside the botanist.

“'Your smile lights up the room,'” Claudette reads.

“Aww, that's adorable!” Kate exclaims. “A Valentine's day card!”

“The joke being that we're continually outdoors,” Ace explains. “Meaning my smile does jack shit.”

“Are you sure? Maybe they meant figuratively,” Claudette gently prods.

“Yes Claudy, I'm sure I'm not getting mystery love notes,” Ace snorts at the incredulous suggestion, before turning back to the others. “Come on, whose idea was it? Fess up!” he demands, looking over the group

When nobody makes a move to come clean, others also looking around in confusion, Ace eventually focuses his stare on Nea, Meg and Feng, the trio of troublemakers sitting together by the fire.

“The hell you looking at me for?” Nea cusses.

“That’s lame as fuck,” Meg agrees.

“I'm tempted to make one now just so you’ll see—” Feng starts.

“That's a great idea! We should all make Valentine's day cards for each other!” Kate suggest, missing the gamer's point entirely.

“Look, there's a drawing too!” Cheryl suddenly exclaims, pointing at the back of the mystery note still in Claudette’s hands.

Ace sighs and leans over to look, fully expecting a doodled caricature of himself or even a crude phallic sketch.

Instead, he finds a pretty good drawing of some sort of flower. It’s not perfect, but it looks like someone clearly put a lot of work into it.

“It's a clover,” Claudette informs, glancing up at Ace with a smile. “No doubt for luck, even if it doesn't have the iconic four leaves.”

“Uh. Maybe,” Ace says, a little taken aback at the information. Someone really went through a lot of effort just for a small prank.

“So? Who's it from?” Steve asks impatiently.

“It still doesn’t say, Steve,” Cheryl sighs in irritation.

“I mean, Jeff and Jane are the artists,” Quentin points out.

“Uh-huh, sure, Jeff would draw a flower card for Ace and not his botanist girlfriend,” Meg snorts, making Claudette duck her head bashfully.

“And Jane—" Steve starts, excitedly turning to the former talk show host.

“No,” Jane interrupts the teen. “I mean this in the nicest way possible, but hell no.”

“No offense taken, sweetheart,” Ace grins good-naturedly, the cheesy flirt making the woman grimace.

“What about Bill?” Nea suggests out of the blue.

“What the hell are you on, kid?” Bill snorts, and even Ace has to bite back a laugh over the thought of the gruff veteran writing love letters.

“Just trying to think of someone in his age range!” Nea protests.

“Well, did anyone see anything?” Quentin asks. “We can’t all have been in a trial when the note was placed.”

“I’ve been in like three trials today,” Feng complains.

“I don’t think any of us really keep track of people at the fire,” Kate says. “Anyone could have walked by and put it there.”

“Aww, so we’re not gonna know who it was?” Steve frowns.

“Maybe that’s for the best,” Jane says.

As the commotion seems to die down, Claudette hands back the note back to Ace.

“You should keep it. It seems you have a secret admirer, after all,” Claudette says, smiling.

“Guess it can’t hurt,” Ace says, reluctantly pocketing the card. He’s still not sure it's genuine, but is intrigued by the sudden turn of events nonetheless.

Surprisingly, it seems the kids aren’t quite ready to give up on finding out the culprit. Some time later, Ace sees Cheryl, Steve and Quentin huddle together by one of the tree stumps, Cheryl looking to be taking notes on a map.

“Did you ask the ones who just got back?” Cheryl asks.

“Yup! Steve says. “Jeff was mostly confused, and David laughed his ass off. Laurie said she hadn't seen anything weird before she got taken to the trial. And Tapp just looked like he'd lost all hope for humanity,” Steve summarizes.

“Sounds about right,” Quentin huffs.

“Okay, so we've ruled out us three, Laurie, Jeff, Claudette, Jane, Bill, Tapp and David,” Cheryl recaps.

“And Nance has Jonathan, and Felix has his girlfriend,” Steve reminds.

“We should definitely rule out Nea too, since she’s way younger than him,” Quentin says. “Meg and Feng too, I guess."

“You're right, they always bully Ace too,” Steve casually remarks.

Ace rolls his eyes behind his shades and keeps shuffling his cards, not understanding why the group is so hell bent on talking about him like he’s not even there.

“Oh, and Yui,” Cheryl says.

“Good point,” Quentin says.

“Huh? Why?” Steve asks, confused.

“She, uh…” Cheryl falters. “Girl talk. I know it's not her.”

“Okay!” Steve beams.

And that pretty much sums up Ace's expectations for their little operation to succeed. If Steve somehow still hasn't figured out that the Japanese woman is solely interested in other women, Ace doesn’t have much trust in his detective work.

“Kate?” Cheryl suggests.

“She’s making Valentine’s cards for all of us as we speak,” Quentin snorts. “I don’t think she’d play favorites.”

“What about Dwight?” Steve suggests.

“Well… it’s definitely awkward and weird enough to fit his MO,” Cheryl considers.

“I thought he was into Jake?” Quentin says.

And that’s about the time Ace tunes out and goes to bug Tapp to play cards with him, hoping the detective will be happy to pretend like this entire thing never happened.

Ace doesn’t know how long it is before he’s finally taken to a trial, but it feels like an eternity. The atmosphere around camp is awkward as people trickle in and out from trials and someone always feels the need to point out he was on the receiving end of an anonymous person’s affection. The reactions, unsurprisingly, range from awkward confusion to straight up laughter.

So when the fog finally surrounds Ace, he actually welcomes it. The familiar sight of the Autohaven gas station is enough to take his mind off the teasing back at camp, at least momentarily.

But another problem presents itself right as he rounds a corner of scrap and finds Élodie on a generator—

“Hey, come here often?” Ace jokes, crouching down next to the machine to get to work.

—And the woman immediately gets up to leave.

“It wasn’t me, so don’t get any ideas,” Élodie scowls in his direction.

“Huh? I didn’t—” Ace tries to explain, but she’s already taking off in a sprint, and Ace thinks he hears her mutter “creep”.

Ace sighs and barely resists the urge to bash his face against the generator in frustration. This day just keeps getting better.

To Ace’s utter delight—that is to say, absolute annoyance—his mystery admirer becomes the biggest source of entertainment for the survivors. He doesn’t mind playing along for the first few jabs at his expense, thinking the others will surely get bored after just a few hours.

They don’t.

Most of the group still seem determined to figure out the person behind the note, others are content to gossip and joke about the possibilities, and some go as far as to blame Ace for intentionally stirring up drama. His not-so-subtle suggestions to let it go are shrugged off, and after a few days, Ace resigns himself to his fate and figures the sooner he lets the whole thing sort itself out, the better.

It doesn’t mean he’s happy about it.

To add insult to injury, even the killers seem to have a sudden hard-on for him, focusing Ace with single-minded determination every chance they get.

It's only a few days later, when the Pig kneels down Ace's prone form to place a trap on his head, that he realizes why.

“There you go, lover boy,” the woman's voice sounds mocking despite being muffled by her mask.

“Wah?” Ace asks, the device attached to his jaw making it hard to speak.

“I heard someone has a little admirer,” the Pig says. “I figured it warrants some special treatment.”

The word is accentuated by throwing Ace up on a hook, and the gambler's following scream is as much from pain as it is from frustration.

When Ace gets back to the campfire after having his head popped by the killer’s trap, he sits down on a log furthest from the group, hoping to get a breather—

“Hey, look who it is!” Ash immediately interrupts his moment of solitude, sitting down uninvited next to Ace. “How you doing, champ?” Ash grins, elbowing him in the side.

“What do you want?” Ace asks, feeling much more irritable than usual because of the constant teasing.

“I mean…” Ash says, before looking around and lowering his voice. “Have you figured out who it is?”

Ace rolls his eyes and resists the urge to slap the man with his own prosthetic hand.

“Come on, you can tell me!” Ash grins in a very suspicious way.

“If I find out, you’ll be the first to know. Trust me,” Ace whispers, lying out of his ass.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Ash laughs, way louder than necessary. “I’m happy for you; at least someone around here will be getting laid!”

Half of the camp erupts into snickers and the other half turns to glare at Ace, notifying him that their conversation was definitely loud enough to overhear.

“Not in front of the children!” Jane sneers, like Ace enjoys having his sex life publicly broadcasted.

“Oh, would you look at that!” Ace quips with fake cheer as fog starts creeping up his legs, thankful for the Entity’s timing even though he barely got back to the campfire. “Time for another trial!”

When the fog clears from around him, Ace is in the killer shack in Red Forest with Cheryl and Felix right beside him.

“I'm gonna go find Zarina,” Cheryl whispers to Ace, informing him of who their last teammate is.

“Sure,” Ace says, knowing it’s good to split up, as Felix has already started repairs on the generator in the shack—

“I need to privately ask her about the note!” Cheryl beams and is sprinting away before Ace can reply.

Which is just as well, because he might have said a few choice words to the kid through his annoyance. Thankfully, he's left with Felix, one of the few people who have treated Ace normally throughout this entire thing.

“Fuck this,” Ace curses, joining the handsome German on the generator. Felix glances up but doesn't ask, and Ace appreciates being given the space to rant. “This is the worst thing that's ever happened!”

“The note?" Felix asks.

“What else? It seems it's all anyone ever talks about!” Ace rages, throwing one of his hands up in frustration and nearly causing the machine to explode. “I swear, this is worse than middle school,” Ace huffs. “I have girls gossiping, kids pestering and killers bullying me. And for what? A shitty piece of paper!”

Damn, it feels good to get this out. Ace doubts Felix cares, but it's nice to get to vent to someone he knows won't make the situation worse.

“Whoever left the note must be an idiot,” Felix comments bluntly, and it gives Ace pause.

Sure, Ace is frustrated, but he's still a little sentimental over the note and cute gesture behind it. Regardless, he shouldn’t be surprised that the no-nonsense architect would find the notion ridiculous.

“I'm just so done with it,” Ace sighs. “At this point, I'd take any explanation. Even an 'oops, wrong trunk, it was never meant for you'. Sure, I like being in the spotlight, but this is getting unbearable.”

Felix doesn't say anything, only keeps working away; probably embarrassed being forced to discuss Ace's (lack of) love life.

“I—” Felix starts after an awkward silence.

“Shit, I'm sorry,” Ace interrupts with a chuckle, not wanting the German to be any more uncomfortable than he already clearly is. “Didn't mean to talk about ear off about this stuff. Let's get this gen done, huh?”

Felix immediately seems relieved, and Ace jumps at the chance to change topics.

“You ever been to China?” Ace asks, nodding at the firework decoration on top of their generator.

As they chat about one of Felix's business trips to Shanghai, Ace is simultaneously glad for a distraction from his Valentine's fiasco and melancholy about their shallow friendship.

Maybe he'd take this whole thing more seriously if there was any possibility it would actually lead to something with the one person he's even remotely interested in. If Ace was in his prime, he'd probably have made a move on Felix months ago, girlfriend and heterosexuality be damned. Young and reckless Ace wouldn't have cared, happily flirting his ass off.

Meanwhile, old and slightly less reckless Ace has to settle for shitty jokes and sneaking glances at Felix.

When the Ghostface finally makes an appearance during their second generator and proceeds to chase and tunnel Ace to death despite the others' best efforts to save him, Ace isn’t even surprised anymore.

“I'm starting to wonder if the note is even legit,” Quentin says one day.

“How come?” Kate asks, cocking her head.

“Don't you think Ace's secret admirer would have come clean by now?" Quentin prods.

“Maybe it was just the Entity messing with us?” Laurie suggests.

“If it was a prank from someone, I’m kinda proud of them for pulling it off,” Nea says. “Especially for this long!”

“I think it’s mean,” Claudette says. “They’ve allowed this to go on for way too long. Just look at poor Ace!”

Everyone turns to collectively look at Ace, who is just trying to play some goddamn solitaire in peace while the rest, again, seem content to talk about him like he’s not even there.

“He looks the same as always,” Meg snorts.

“He’s been tunneled to death the last then trials in a row,” Laurie scolds.

“I’m fine,” Ace insists.

“I think his secret fan is just shy!” Kate continues and sparks another debate, oblivious to Ace’s annoyance.

When Ace gets back from yet another unsuccessful trial and sees a group of gossiping people and a grinning Nea, he groans in exasperation.

Before anyone can bring up Ace’s least favorite subject, Felix butts in.

“Ace,” Felix addresses, coming up beside the group. “Do you have time to teach me that perk you used the other trial? With the longer aura-reading?”

“You want… one of my perks?” Ace asks, surprised.

Felix has always seemed more altruistic than others, and it’s no secret Ace's perks were only used by… Well, Ace.

“Um, yes. If it’s not a bother,” Felix says, discreetly glancing at the group of gossip-hungry survivors waiting to attack Ace’s misery.

And it dawns on Ace that Felix is giving him a distraction to slip away.

“Oh, of course!” Ace grins. “Right this way!”

As soon as they’re out of earshot from the campfire, Ace starts prattling away.

“Thanks for covering for me!” Ace beams. “I thought they’d have gotten bored by now—"

“It was me,” Felix interrupts grimly, making Ace pipe down and turn to look at him.

“Uh… come again?” Ace asks, confused.

“I did it. I wrote the note,” Felix confesses, looking at Ace in determination.

“What? Why?” Ace asks, incredulous. When Felix's bravado falters, he keeps going. “Look, you don't have to cover for whoever it was,” Ace sighs. “I don’t blame you for wanting this entire thing to be over—"

“I'm serious,” Felix says. “I've been lying for way too long. I should have come clean before, but I was too much of a coward.”

Alright, what the actual fuck? Why would Felix, of all people, have sent Ace a love note?

While he’s gaping stupidly, Felix continues:

“Claudette was right, it’s my fault for letting this go on for so long. I’m sorry.”

“But… your girlfriend—” Ace starts, struggling to wrap his head around the whole thing.

“Will hopefully move on once she realizes I'm not coming back,” Felix says. “I've started to accept that I'm not getting out of here.”

“Well, that sounds cheerful,” Ace comments.

“Sheiße, I didn't mean it like that,” Felix winces. “I just… thought I'd do things differently this time. Since I never had the courage to, in my old life.”

“So… where do I come into the picture?” Ace asks, skeptical.

“I…” Felix says, wringing his hands in a nervous gesture. “Wanted to see how you would react to the note. It was stupid.”

“Huh? How come?”

“I caused you nothing but harm,” Felix sighs. “First you thought I was mocking you, then the others kept bothering you, and even the killers were giving you a hard time. I'm sorry, I should never have done it.”

“No, I mean—” Ace flounders for an explanation. Sure, he'd been annoyed, but none of the things that happened were Felix’s fault. “Why give something like that to me?”

“Isn't it obvious?” Felix says, scratching at his neck while averting his eyes. “I admit I haven't celebrated Valentine's day much, but I assumed…” he trails off.

What? Felix was seriously trying to test the waters of… getting together with Ace?

It slowly starts to make sense. Felix’s strange behavior. The messy handwriting on the note, probably from Felix’s nerves. The surprising artistic talent of the sketch, after a lifetime of architectural drawings.

“Well, this is unexpected,” Ace says with a smirk, not able to keep the cockiness from seeping into his voice at the knowledge that Felix, somehow, seems to be interested in him.

“Sorry—”

“I said unexpected, not unwelcome,” Ace interrupts.

And then gets to watch the realization slowly dawn on Felix, the perpetual worried frown on the other’s face smoothing out as his eyes widen in hope.

“You don't mind?” Felix asks.

“Let's just say I'm surprised you haven't caught me looking,” Ace grins. “I never expected someone as handsome as you to return the attention,” he can't resist flirting.

“Ähm, well, I…” Felix flusters from the compliment, looking at the ground. “Am not very good at this.”

“I wouldn’t say that,” Ace says.

Then, he reaches into his breast pocket, pulling out the infamous note he’s kept on him this entire time. Felix’s gaze follows his movement as Ace carefully unfolds the paper, crumpled and smudged from having been with him trial after trial.

“I thought you threw it away,” Felix says quietly, eyes wide in awe.

“You don’t just throw away a good luck charm,” Ace chastises playfully, pointedly brushing his thumb over the clover drawing. “Especially not one that’s the nicest thing anyone’s done for me in a long time.”

Ace bites his tongue to stop prevent more mushy sentiments from slipping out. Felix is still staring way too intently and not saying a word, so Ace clears his throat self-consciously tucks the note safely back into his pocket.

“I can’t believe you kept it,” Felix finally says, an adorable smile on his lips as he meets Ace’s eyes.

“Well, seeing as we’ve now established that we’re both sentimental saps…” Ace starts with a smirk, stepping closer to Felix to test the waters. “I have a question.”

“Oh, umh… Yes?” Felix says, straightening his back but still seeming nervous.

It's adorable, and Ace wants to kick himself for not noticing anything sooner. Still, there's no time like the present.

“Be my valentine?” Ace asks with a grin.

Felix's posture instantly relaxes, and the smile is back on his face.

“I'd love to,” Felix says.

Ace’s grin widens until he feels like it’ll be permanently etched onto his face. This is a much better outcome than he ever expected when he found an unassuming note with his items.

“So, ehm…” Felix starts after they’ve been staring at each other for a beat too long, snapping Ace out of it. “Do you… should we…?” Felix falters, nervously brushing a stray lock from his face.

“Wanna find a place to sit down and chat?” Ace suggests, not feeling any need to rush things now that he knows where they stand with each other. “I don’t know about you, but I could use a break from the others.”

“Me too,” Felix says, seeming relieved. “I admit I’m not looking forward to what the others will say about this.”

“Fuck em!” Ace says. “They’ve had their fun, I’m not gonna let them put you through the same shit as they did me. We don’t even have to tell them.”

“No, I want to,” Felix insists. “If I have to hear one more rude joke about you from Feng…” Felix’s mouth pinches into a thin line.

“Aww, babe,” Ace teases, the pet name slipping out before he can stop it. “You don’t have to defend my honor.”

“I do, and I will,” Felix says with surprising determination.

“Well, in that case, I won’t stop you,” Ace grins.

“Good,” Felix says with a smug little smirk.

And the sudden assertiveness makes heat creep up Ace’s neck, quickly starting to regret his suggestion to take things slow.

“I, uh, I think I saw a pretty cozy clearing not far from here,” Ace says, eager to get the chance to get to know more about his companion.

“Lead the way,” Felix agrees.

They end up sitting next to each other under the stars and talking for what has to be hours, but goes by in the blink of an eye. No longer having to filter himself and keep their conversation casual is a much-needed break from the past few days, and the smile never once leaves Ace’s face.

Talking to Felix makes the feelings Ace has tried so hard to ignore come back full force, reminding him of why the man caught his eye in the first place. Sure, Felix is still more attractive than anyone has the right to be, but he’s also insanely smart and surprisingly witty past the initial anxious exterior. The way he smiles and gives his undivided attention even when Ace talks about silly, insignificant things not only makes Ace forget all about his recent frustrations, but also takes his mind away from the strange world surrounding them.

And when Felix eventually scoots even closer and looks at Ace with nothing but fondness in his eyes, Ace has no trouble throwing his initial hesitance out of the window and going in for a kiss.

It’s not earth-shattering or particularly intense, it’s just really, really nice and makes Ace’s heart do stupid leaps in his chest. It’s been so long since he even kissed anyone, and getting to smooch the person he’s been secretly pining over for months and have said person eagerly return the kiss?

“Why the hell haven’t we done this sooner?” Ace voices his thought when he pulls away from the gentle kiss, making Felix huff a quiet laugh into their shared breathing space.

“I should have just signed the note,” Felix says.

“Good thing you can make it up to me now, Valentine,” Ace grins.

Felix chuckles warmly and a callused hand comes up to gently cup Ace’s cheek before tilting his head up into another kiss.

And even though Ace isn’t normally one for holiday celebrations, he’s looking forward to spending many more with Felix by his side.

#riconti #dbd fanfic #ace visconti #felix richter #dweetwrites #dbd #dead by daylight

[darkdevasofdestruction]

BakuSquad In Jail

I saw these pics randomly and talking with my friend, @thatweirdfrenchcanadian​ , we came up with some funny HCs for the BakuSquad and the reason they got in jail.

I have no idea who the artists are, I’ve been having the pics in my phone for a while, but if anyone knows the artist, please let me know so I can tag them appropriately!

Beginning: 

They were at a party, just the 5 of them, and they were happy for getting into Pro-Hero agencies, and now they weren’t side kicks anymore, so of course, they had to celebrate accordingly!

A huge party where they all let loose and have fun without anyone judging!

What none of them were expecting was to get shit faced drunk and do lots of weird shit, enough to somehow get into jail for whatever reason.

Kaminari Denki:

Baby Pikachu got so drunk that he made Momo make a Pikachu onesie for him, on the spot, along with a Naruto headband, and made Mina do some lines on his face, to resemble Naruto, then went out to the nearest monument and threw paint at it.

If they were human statues, he’d draw lightnings on their foreheads and write “VOLDEMORT WAS HERE” on their torsos.

If they were animals, he will paint them in weird colours.

And if they were some new art, he’d just throw random paint and say “IT’S MODERN ART, YOU’LL NEVER UNDERSTAND, NORMIE!”

If that wasn’t enough, he stole a shopping cart and made Kirishima push him in it down the street.

Street that was actually a slope made by Todoroki in an attempt to ice skate and show off.

Unfortunately, Kirishima got distracted by a pigeon and started running after it to become the new Snow White, and Denki kept going down the ice slope, shrieking in the cart, thinking he was in a roller coaster.

When the policeman got him, he started giggling, saying he’s not drunk, just super LIT, FAM, and started doing a super fast triple dab.

Triple dab that he ended up slamming his arm into his head so hard that he knocked himself out and he was out like a light.

Bakugou Katsuki:

You can’t blame a guy who goes to sleep earlier than 9pm and barely drinks alcohol, so he can have a perfect hero-training schedule that he got drunk from very few shots of vodka and now he was feeling light like a feather and wants to entertain people...

More or less because their awes and gasps of wonder boost his ego so much that he wants to show off his explosions.

Katsuki starts doing random explosions around the house, then, when people tell him to do flashier tricks, he goes out and pulls lots of different typed of explosions, flashier, with more light, with more heat, with more colour, with more sound and whatever else the audience wanted.

When the cops came, they wanted to charge him for illegal use of fireworks, which sent Bakugou into a blind frenzy since NOBODY CALLS HIS EXPLOSIONS MERE, LAME FIREWORKS, OKAY?!

He started roaring and growling at the policeman, showing him that he can do EXPLOSIONS not some stupidly lame fireworks, which only ends up with lots of curses, fighting, and it takes a lot of new policeman to get him an elephant tranquillizer to make him stop.

Of course, they needed special restraints for him, since he’s so violent, but that wasn’t a problem, and Bakugou was used to these restraints, since he was forced to wear them twice before.

SERO HANTA

Poor Sero was mostly innocent, and he is pretty used to light drinking and these types of parties, but he really wanted to let loose this time around, so he started playing beer pong, never have I ever with vodka and tequila shots, and many other drinking games that made him SO happy in his drunken state.

As well as that, he had some weed joints that he really wanted to smoke...

And some LSD, because what could be better than trippin’ at a party when you’re so happy?

Always time for first times!

He used his tape to get into a spiderman position, hanging down from the ceiling after getting the LSD and started smoking some joints, letting the euphoria take effect on him.

Hanta started grinning and giggling, swaying back and forth with that tape, until someone, that he still has no idea, even to this moment (Definitely Denki) dared him to play Tarzan out in the city, so he started jumping from building to building, yelling incoherently that he is the KING OF THE URBAN JUNGLE...Or something like that, it was mostly unintelligible.

When he got arrested, he got into a spiderman position again and winked at the policeman, asking if he wanted to be his Mary Jane.

Then passed out and fell on the ground...For some reason, giggling in that unconscious state.

Ashido Mina

Mina was drinking cocktails, martinis and tequilas with each costume she would do for the catwalk she created in the house, each time, flashier and more ridiculous outfits, but hey, they were fun, and for some reason, most of them had holes...From accidental acid drips.

She MAY also be on acid anyway, who knows...Mina says her name is symbolic for more than her Quirk...

She got dared to recreate some iconic make ups from James Charles and mid-way to her look, she realised she didn’t have everything she needed, so she went to the closest shop and raided the make up isle, trying out each and every one of the products there, using her selfie camera as a mirror and trying to do her best.

The shop assistants were horrified at the girls behaviour, but her only answer was “Hi, I’m the Alien Queen, wanna be my Predator?”

When the cop car came over, and the lights started going red and blue, she thought she was being photographer by the paparazzi, so she brought a random pair of sunglasses, with the tag in the middle of her face, and put her fluffy boa around her shoulders.

And started posing.

She didn’t have perfect balance for most of the posings, but she tried her best to mimic all those cool fashion pics she saw in magazines.

At the end, she asked the cop if he wanted an autograph, and when he refused, she giggled, took out her eyeliner and wrote on his forehead ALIEN QUEEN XOXO

Kirishima Eijirou

Kiri was the most innocent in all of this, and he shouldn’t have been arrested in the first place, but he wanted to be where he best friends are, so that’s just that.

Well, he was convinced by the rest of the BakuSquad that it’s MANLY to drink, so he had a drinking contest with TetsuTetsu, that ended up with both of them under the table pretty fast.

The bet of this contest was that whoever was the first to wake up would win, and since TetsuTetsu won, Kiri had to take the water gun that Tsuyu brought and pretend to play CS:Go in the nearest store.

Of course, he did just that, but he was completely oblivious to the fact that Tokoyami wrapped his bandana to his face, instead of his forehead, to look like a funny western cowboy or whatever, and when he got in the store, all not-so-stealthily, the shop assistants hit the alarm and called the cops for having a robber.

With all that loud noise, he started squirting water everywhere, shrieking and saying WATER IN THE HOLE, THROW THE GRENADE, TAKE COVER, HIT SPACE, AHHHHHH!

Needless to say, the assistants and customers were more confused than scared.

When the cop came over, he blinked at him confused, saying that he can’t get in jail, since he’s a shark, and then shoot water in the cop’s face.

Oops?

The end:

When they all woke up, Mina was the first to realise what happened, due to her phone buzzing like crazy to her Snapchat stories, and only then she realised what happened...At least to her.

Then, her jailer told her how she got there, and she could only laugh at how bad she was in only a few hours of the night.

Of course, Yaomomo was graceful enough to bail them out of there, was the caution was nothing more than a breeze and they didn’t actually do anything too bad to actually keep them there anyway.

All that, while Midoriya was bawling his eyes out like a waterfall to some random jailer, telling them how amazingly kind hearted and nice heroes they are, and that they did a mistake, and it won’t happen again...

Blah Blah Blah.

He didn’t even realise how Mina walked out of her cell and sprinted to the boys’ cell, where she stood on the ground, telling them what Jirou, Tsuyu and Tokoyami told them happened that night and how they all ended up there.

Of course, it was all in good fun, despite the fact that they were sure Aizawa was going to hunt them down and kill them for the idiocy they did...

But they aren’t called the 1-Braincell Squad for no reason, right?!

To commemorate such a weirdass experience, Mina took the picture with her phone, telling them all to look natural, so they did as told.

Except Bakugou, who was beyond pissed off at what happened and kept grumbling something about stupid fireworks.

They were SO doing this shit again.

#bakusqaud #katsuki bakugou #katsuki bakugo imagine #bakugou katsuki #bakugou #bakugou katsuki headcanons #bnha #bnha headcanons #mha #mha headcanons #boku no hero academia headcanons #my hero academia headcanons #sero hanta #sero #sero hanta headcanons #ashido mina #ashido mina headcanons #kaminari denki #kaminari denki headcanons #kirishima eijirou #kirishima #kirishima eijirou headcanons #kaminari #bakusquad headcanons #bakusquad imagine #crackfic #crack fic

[sinnamonn]

Welcome to Hell ch. 3: Deal with a Devil

Levi kin assigns Gia and makes them help in a revenge plot against Mammon

Word count: 2.8 k

Mammon looked between Gia and Levi nervously,

“..Uh, listen up, human!” He started, “This here is Leviathan, Avatar of Envy. He’s the third oldest of us brothers. His name is kinda hard to say so just call him Levi”

“Hi.” Gia waved, only to be ignored by him. Rude.

“OK! Let’s move on!” Mammon said quickly, only for Levi to stop him.

“Mammon! Give me back my money. Then crawl in a hole and die!”

Oh shit.

“Come on, I told you I’d get it to you! I just need a little more time.” Mammon replied, “and you still want me to die even after I give it back? That’s harsh, Levi!”

So the Avatar of Greed was not the most popular brother, Gia gathered as they watched the two bicker.

“You need a little more time? How much more?” Levi sneered

“A little more means a little more!” He snapped back

“You’ve been telling me that for the last 200 years!”

“Hey, no! It hasn’t been 200 years it’s been 260! Get it right, Levi!”

“Dude you are not making yourself look better.” Gia said. They really wished they had popcorn about now.

“Yeah, that’s even worse!” Levi agreed

“Don’t you gang up on me!” Mammon exclaimed, “What the hell, human, I thought you were on my side?!”

“Nah, I’m still pissed that you tried to rob me. And called me broken. And were just a general dickhead to me.” Gia replied, earning a long groan from the demon. Levi picked up where they stopped.

“Unbelievable. Seriously Mammon, you’re—“

“I’m what? Scum? Is that what you’re gonna say?” Mammon cut his brother off with a harsh glare.

“A lowlife and a waste of space!”

Oh damn, that was harsh. Harsher than Gia thought, at least; they knew they were siblings and siblings fought like rabid animals but still.

“Hey, come on that’s even worse!? Mammon whined.

“Whatever, just give me my money.” Levi huffed, “I need to buy the blu ray box set of Journey to the Devildom: The Tale of a Little She-Devil and her Reluctant Companion.” Levi’s expression changed when he talked about the set, you could barely tell he was trying to extort Mammon.

Good lord that name was long. Was it a visual novel adaption? The only TV shows Gia ever saw with names as long as that were always anime adaptations.

“The initial round of copies includes promotional tickets to a live event as a special bonus.”

Oh, that was definitely anime.

Mammon only looked at him with a blank stare, “I’ve got no idea what you’re even talking about, Levi, but it doesn’t matter. I don’t even have any money to give you! How am I supposed to give back money I don’t have?”

Levi’s expression changed back to that sneer, “So then, you refuse to pay me back?” He asked.

“You looking for a fight, is that it?”

Fuck that! Gia did not want those two fighting in their room, they just got it for god’s sake. Not to mention their bickering got annoying.

“Hey, wait!” Gia put themself between the demons, not the smartest move but whatever, “If you’re gonna fight, then do it someplace that isn’t my room.”

Mammon ignored them,only putting on a mock heroic smile, “Listen human. You remember my advice from before? Well, you’re about to witness that for real. So…”

He took off running.

He fucking took off running. He had a bit of a limp from getting kicked in the kneecaps but he was still running. That bastard.

“Time for you to die, because it’s either you or me and it ain’t gonna be me!” He called back to them.

“You fucker! I’m gonna come back and haunt your ass!” Gia snapped before punching a wall. If they lived through this they were gonna make him hurt.

“Wh..damn it, Mammon!” Levi spat.

“I know! That fucking dickhead, I’m gonna beat his ass later!” Gia agreed, but Levi didn’t say anything to them, only looking down at them as if they were a bug or something. Gia suddenly got the distinct feeling that she would not be met with the bare minimum hospitality Asmodeus and Satan gave them.

“Do you even realize what happened? Mammon used you as a distraction to get away from me.” He said, “Or maybe I should say he used you as a sacrifice.”

“You don’t need to rub it in.”

“I admit Mammon is the scummiest scumbag you’ll ever meet...But still, that was pretty dumb of you letting him use you like that.”

Why was Gia getting blamed!? They didn’t know Mammon would just take off!

He sighed, “This is exactly why humans are-wait a second…”

“Uh, no, lets not do that.” Gia snapped, their already thin patience was running thinner, “Humans are what now!?” They took a step closer to the avatar of envy, glaring up at him. First they were kidnapped, then forced to stay here, then almost mugged, then left for dead, and now this asshole was just being xenophobic! They were tired!

“Out with it! If you have something to say then say it!” Gia snapped.

Levi was taken aback, staring at them slack jawed and wide eyes like a fool. Had no one ever had the guts to talk to him like that or…?

He mumbled something under his breath.

“What was that?”

“You’re just like Taiga! The Palmtop Tiger! F-from Toradora!” He exclaimed.

“Wha…?”

Toradora? Gia hadn’t heard that name in years.

“I Mean, a normie like you probably doesn’t know that anime but—“

“I know that anime, though.” Gia cut him off. They did not get made fun of in middle school for watching anime for some demon to call them a normie, “That one’s, like, on every starter list.”

“Woah! You’re not as much of a normie as I thought!” Levi exclaimed happily, “That means you’ll help me with my plan right!? You’re coming with me to my room!”

Without giving Gia a chance to answer Levi grabbed their wrist and began dragging them elsewhere. They cried internally, already missing the super soft, heavenly bed and fluffy pillows.

They were so tired.

Was this their life now? For a whole-ass year?

—— ——

Levi looked around before unlocking his room and (not) discreetly rushing Gia in.

Woah.

Levi’s room was...incredible.

The ceiling was glass and bathed the rest of the room below in blue, the reflections of water danced across the floor. His ceiling was a tank! Gia’s eye excitedly bounced from the anime and manga collections, to the triple monster in the corner, to the floating jellyfish lights, to the bathtub in the dead center. But what really caught their attention was the very back wall, also made of glass. It was also a tank, a beautifully decorated fish tank filled with plant life all seemingly for the one goldfish that swam peacefully around the center.

“For someone who doesn’t even look like an otaku you really-hey what’re you doing?”

Gia ignored him in favor of the tank, wanting to take a closer look at it, stumbling lightly across Levi’s room.

It was even cooler up close, the plants were real and the water was so clean!

“Oh, that’s Henry 2.0, I named him after the protagonist of my favorite book series The Tales of the Seven Lords, or TSL,” Levi explained, coming up next to them, “I bet even a not-so-normie normie like you thinks it’s pretty lame, right?” He asked bitterly, catching Gia off guard.

“What, no!?” They replied, quickly turning to the demon, “Levi, this is amazing! This is the best set up I’ve ever seen for a goldfish, I can’t count how many times I’ve seen them shoved in a barely one gallon tank with zero enrichment!”

“Y-You’re just making fun!” Levi sputtered, avoiding eye contact.

“Why would I make fun of you for taking really good care of your fish? That’s dumb.”

“Whatever! Just because you’re a little less of a normie doesn’t mean I’ll go easy on you!” He snapped, “Anyway, I didn’t bring you to tell you about Henry or TSL.”

Yeah no shit, gatekeeping asshole.

“I don’t think there’s any harm in just coming out and saying it: Mammon is a complete and utter scumbag.”

“So I’ve gathered.”

“It’s very important that you understand this, so I’ll say it one more time…”

“You really don’t need to—“

“Mammon is a hopeless, worthless, scumbag!” Levi sneered, “I lent that scumbag money, and now I want him to pay me back. But being the scumbag he is, he won’t do it.”

“Ok.” Gia deadpanned, could he get to the point instead of reiterating Mammon’s scumminess? This was getting annoying.

“I wish I could force him, but despite what a rotten waste of space he is, he’s still the second oldest. As the third oldest, no matter how hard I try, I don’t stand a chance against him…”

Gia’s attention trailed off to the tub in the middle of his room. Oh god was that his bed? That couldn’t possibly be comfortable, Levi’s back had to be killing him! Was that why he was such an ass? Because he was sore all the time from sleeping in a bathtub?

“Are you even listening!?”

“Huh?”

“I said his room is covered in junk! Old, empty cup ramen containers, tissues with dried snot and...and boogers in them! Stuff was strewn everywhere!” Levi shuddered, “ And there Seraphina was, lying on the FLOOR! Tossed aside like a piece of junk!How could he?! That’s no way to treat an ultra rare figure.”

Oh so this was about a figure now?

“ I tried getting back at Mammon for her, I went into his room when he was asleep and tried to beat him up, but when I brought my foot down on his stomach next thing I knew he wasn’t there anymore. It all happened so fast,” he continued, “then he grabbed me and slammed me headfirst into the floor in a pile driver. And the worst was that he was COMPLETELY NAKED!”

Gia had to try and hold back their laughter, the image of a screaming Levi getting the shit kicked out of him by a naked Mammon was too funny. That had to be the most sibling thing they had heard all...day? Night? What time even was it? Come to think of it, how did time work in the Devildom? When they had been spirited away Gia had been getting ready for bed, so was it also night here?

“...Why does he have to sleep in the nude? He could at least put on some underwear. I don’t remember anything else.” He sighed, “ You've seen just how fast he is yourself, haven’t you? No one aside from Lucifer or Beel has that kind of speed. But if, say, a human made a pact with Mammon, and bound him to their service…”

“Wait, you want me to make a pact with him?” Gia asked, “Doesn’t that involve, like, selling my soul? I feel like there are better demons for that.”

“Well, you’re not wrong, but this isn’t about you. This is about me getting my money back from Mammon and you helping me.” Levi huffed. Selfish ass. “Besides, you get the benefit of Mammon having to do whatever you tell him to.”

Oh?

Maybe this whole pact thing wasn’t such a bad idea?

“So you want me to make a pact with Mammon then force him to give you back your money, and I get a demon slave out of it?” Gia asked, Levi nodded.

“For a normie, you catch on fast.”

“I’ve been told. Also don’t call me a normie.” They replied, now deciding to give him a hard time, “You know, I’m not so sure about seeing my soul. Maybe I won’t help you.”

“H-Hey! Don’t go back on me! For some pacts you don’t even need to give up your soul, but you still need to give something to the demon. I know exactly how to negotiate that with Mammon!”

“Hmm?” Gia feigned disinterest, but this is exactly what they wanted to get out of Levi.

“It’s goldie, his credit card. Lucifer took it and hid it. Find that, and Mammon will do whatever you want.” Levi explained quickly.

“Well, Levi…” Gia said, a sly smile growing on their face, “You’ve got yourself a deal.”

“....Your smile’s creepy. Stop it.”

What a fucking asshole.

#🏩self insert🏩 #obey me shall we date #self insert writing #self ship writing

[the-resurrection-3d]

so heathers eps 2-3

it's a few days late but I just woke up from a dream about my TomTord Roommate and I don't want to be actually productive. I had to go back and copy-paste this from Word because Tumblr’s new text post editor has a woefully small character limit. Gotta love how Wordpress of all fucking places is going out of their way to make their new pet project hostile to writers. 

Anyway.

Good things:

the pacing feels like an actual show now

it took them three whole episodes but they finally managed to make JD/Veronica interesting and actually dark. Think the ending of Gone Girl if both characters viewed it as a happy ending.

I love Heather Duke's peacock motif. It's very fitting with her personality and is incorporated tastefully.

Changing “Teenage Suicide (Don’t Do It)” by Big Fun into a musical produced in-universe is a fun idea... I think? It gives me a lot of similar vibes to Riverdale having to justify performing Heathers the Musical in-universe , though that only lasted an episode, whereas this looks like it’s going to be an overarching plot. I honestly think they should just pull a Riverdale and have a full-on musical episode -- at least that would give musical fans something to enjoy. I guess this isn’t a good thing so much as a thing that didn’t annoy me. It’s not conceptually poisoned like a lot of other things here. 

Anything else? No...? Well then, moving on. 

Several new problems have emerged:

Veronica's bug motif is absolutely heinous and I don't have any clue what it's supposed to represent, especially when they keep changing what exact bug she's wearing.

Also you don’t have to vomit blue all over every Veronica scene. It’s very weird because they don’t usually throw red or green or yellow lighting all over everyone’s else scenes. Sure, it’ll feature prominently, such as the shot of Heather M sitting on her bed surrounded by yellow stuffed animals, but that’s at least a characterization detail. I’m talking solely about lightning choices here.

Removing the death of Heather Chandler has destroyed any sense of direction the show could have had. I asked TTR what the characters wanted and what goals they were working towards and she just said, "I have no idea." They had Heather Chandler blackmailing JDonica and Heather M. getting gaslit and victim-blamed by everyone around her, but both of these things were done by the end of the episode.

This is a problem a lot of teen dramas have, but I think it’s worth noting that the pop music choices rang from “okay” to “.... but why though.” Like in the scene where Heather C. reveals she’s still alive, it plays “Halo” by Beyoncé, get it, because they thought she was dead! Except it doesn’t fit the tone of the scene nor Heather C’s intentionality, and there’s nothing funny about the contrast, either. What? 

 Heathers looked at the controversy around 13 Reasons Why's suicide scene and said "bet." Except it's not even done well because the entire point of 13RW s1 was getting to know Hannah and understand why she kermited. We always know she's killed herself, sure, but the series utilizes the tapes and frequent flashbacks to characterize Hannah, especially by the time we actually see the suicide. This episode just dumps trauma on Heather M. and has her kill herself at the end. Of episode 2.

After the funeral scene, the rest of ep3 is just pointless generic teen drama, only half of which was made interesting by that Gone Girl twist at the end (where JD kills Ram because Veronica is going out with him and Veronica finds this thrilling and romantic).

The other plot, about Heathers D and C fighting for power, culminates in Heather C forcing D to break-up with Kurt and then bouncing D off the stage during play auditions. Problem one: this is all drama I could get in any teen show. Problem two: you could have easily set up Duke/Kurt in episode one by having a scene where Kurt asks why Duke just she let Chandler humiliate him in front of everyone, allowing us to see that Duke's subservience to Chandler has actual personal costs to her (since the eating disorder angle is out). Problem three: having Duke constantly just back down whenever Chandler challenges her is boring and lame. Why not have a sing-off between the two Heathers? Why not have Heather D. gain the self-confidence her movie self did after C's "death" and then not be fully willing to play nice anymore, especially after Chandler forced Duke to publicly break up with and denounce Kurt for no real reason?

But we can't have the sing-off, because it's getting pretty clear that this show has the same problem RWBY does, where the writers/directors care more about the characters they made than the actual main characters. Characters like the teachers, Betty Finn, and whoever tf this new black girl is get to be major players because their personalities were not as previously well-defined as JD's, Veronica's, or any of the Heathers'. This is also pretty apparent in how Kurt and Ram have both been rewritten to not be douchebros at all (racism aside, because remember, the show doesn't think racism is that bad), despite the episode's title, “Date Rape and AIDS Jokes,” referencing their movie characterization. The show is so obviously uninterested in its supposed main characters that JD and Veronica have only had two real romantic moments together in over two hours of content. Heather M. has gotten the most development... only because the show realized it hadn't given any reason for anyone to care about her before she killed herself off.

JD’s dialogue is fucking horrendous. Imagine if every single word out of Jughead’s mouth was the “I’m a weirdo” speech but five times as long. And you know what, in defense of Jughead, at least Lean Jesus has things going on in his life outside of plowing Betty and wallowing in his own melodrama. He has hobbies, goals, and complicated relationships with other characters. The only things JD has are Veronica and bitching at his dad/his dad’s new girlfriend about how love is a wound and all this other nihilistic shit he got off r/im14andthisisdeep. I’m honestly surprised he didn’t counter Veronica talking about how she wanted to be normal with “Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.” Another missed characterization moment: JD bringing a sword from his katana collection (that’s only seen once in episode three) to school and threatening Kurt and Ram with that instead of the gun. I think that would have been fun.

The show also hates black women. And Native Americans. In such a way that it actively contradicts itself (the pilot established that Heather C. actually isn't just a keyboard warrior and goes to irl protests, so why would Heather C. not say a word about Westerburg's school statue being a Confederate soldier holding an Indigenous person's decapitated head?)

[yoonjinkooked]

Daddy Day Care  |  Chapter 2

pairing; jungkook/female OC

genre; fluff, romcom, smutty in the future, Dad!Jungkook rating; explicit (IN FUTURE CHAPTERS ONLY, not yet) words; this chapter 3319, total so far (8071)

— synopsis; Jeongguk is your average 25-year-old - job, work, friends - everything regular. Except, he has a 5 year old daughter. And he’s single. Until a “princess” waltzes into his life.

warnings for this chapter: You will want to have Jungkook’s children. Failed attempts at flirting. Banter. Cursing. I borrowed two Mamamoo members for this story too, paired up with Yoongi and Namjoon. 

How?

How did it get to this?

I was perfectly fine with just going along with this in order to make Jin shut up for the time being. I was more than ready to spend the entire night sitting alone at the bar, knowing my facial expressions do not make me appear approachable to the girls that look my way. I was ready for my brother to disappear and hit the dance floor with some random girl, while the loud bass turns my brains into pudding as I wait for the right time to leave without giving Jin an excuse to criticize me for not trying.

That’s exactly how the first hour of the night went. But then Jiwoo showed up.

Jiwoo with a cute smile, pretty eyes and a hot body. Jiwoo, who wasn’t put off by my unfriendly stance and who approached me with her hand outstretched. And she’s still here, despite my lame attempts at flirting.

I wasn’t flirting at first – I was just being polite. Despite what Jin might think, this isn’t exactly something I want. I don’t really want a one night stand, to pick up a random chick at a bar. But I also don’t want to find a wife and get married and have more kids.

So what am I supposed to do?

I thought, why the hell not. She’s cute, she’s hot, she’s nice and she’s here. Who cares if she is funny or if she likes coffee or tea, lazy Sundays, if she prefers Friends or The Big Bang Theory? Who fucking cares?

“You really are like a fish out of water here,” she chuckles, twirling her finger over the rim of her drink, a bright pink concoction.

“That obvious, huh?” I laugh, rubbing my neck as I let the nerves get the best of me. I know I don’t fit in, I’m not blind and hell, I’m not even trying to fit in. But to have it rubbed into my face isn’t pleasant.

“Yes,” she laughs. “What do you normally do? Where do you go out if you don’t fit in here?”

“Honestly, the park,” I laugh at my own answer.

“The park?”

“Yeah,” I nod, knowing I might as well just go out with the truth. “I have a daughter.”

Why was I expecting a different reaction?

It’s always shock. Shock, because wow, I’m young. Shock because wait, am I still with the kid’s mom? Shock because oh my god, how noble of me to give up my youth in order to raise a kid. Always shock.

Every damn time, the reaction is the same. I have a daughter, not a second head.

“You have a daughter?” she asks, as if she isn’t sure she heard me well.

“Yeah, a five year old daughter,” I nod. Isn’t it ironic? She didn’t approach me because she wanted something serious. She either just wanted a conversation or a casual fling. One rarely aims to find a partner in a night club. She didn’t want anything serious and yet she’s still taken aback.

“Wow,” she mumbles, looking down at her drink. “How old were you when…?”

“20. Young and stupid. And she’s still the best thing that ever happened to me.”

“Wow,” she smiles up at me. “That’s really lovely. Wow. Thank you for the talk Jeongguk, I gotta get back to my friends,” her smile is forced as she tries to find an escape route. “I’ll see you around.”

“Sure you will,” I doubt it.

It always happens like this.

And on the other hand, as much as I want to, I can’t blame the women that don’t want to meddle into something like this. I imagine it would be pretty hard to accept the fact that you’re not the number one girl in the life of the guy you’re with.

Jiwoo running away from me killed my mood yet again and when I confirm that Jin is preoccupied with some blonde, I pay my bill and leave, knowing damn well I will not be returning to the club anytime soon.

                                                            …

 “So, what are you going to say?” I ask Eunmi, leaning down to pull back the hair that fell over her face, smiling at the way she grips the bag with the present.

“Happy Birthday Unnie Hyejin,” she rehearses and I laugh at her faked enthusiasm. She’s acting as if Hyejin is right in front of her. “Was that good?” she asks, looking up at me with a frown.

“It was perfect sweetie,” I confirm before ringing the doorbell. In a matter of seconds, Namjoon opens it.

“Happy Birthday Unnie Hyejin!” Eunmi all but yells, making both Namjoon and me laugh.

“Wrong Unnie honey,” Namjoon laughs as he ruffles her hair. “Run along, she’s inside. And Jiyoo wants to show you her new doll house.”

Those are the magic words for Eunmi – she literally runs into their house, only stopping to kick of her shoes. She barely even looks at Hyejin as she hands her the bag, blurting out her congratulations and running to the room of her friend, making all of us laugh at her antics.

“She’s too much like you,” Namjoon shakes his head.

“Babe, don’t say that like it’s a bad thing,” Hyejin shakes her head at Namjoon, before smiling at me. “Our Jungkookie is the biggest sweetheart there is.”

“You’ve obviously never watched football with him,” Namjoon comments.

“I have my moments, okay?”

I hug Hyejin, wish her a happy birthday and walk into the living room, expecting it to be full but I only see Yoongi and Byulyi inside. Nonetheless, I hug them and I take the beer Namjoon brought me in the speed of light.

“I thought you’re organizing a party,” I point out but Hyejin just shrugs.

“I am,” she tells me. “A dinner party. The kids are playing, we’re here, ready to drink like adults?”

“Meaning, you four like two stable couples and me like the fifth wheel?” I laugh.

“Oh, she took care of that,” Byulyi laughs, only to laugh even more at my confused expression.

“We’ve tried stopping her,” Yoongi lifts his hands in the air, before sitting back on the sofa. “We told her not to do it but when she puts her mind on something, there’s no helping it.”

“Yeah, you’re telling me,” Namjoon mumbles under his breath and earns a hit on the chest from his wife. “See, this is abuse.”

“Oh, this is not abuse babe,” she gives him an angelic smile.

“Never mind your antics; what the hell have you done noona?” I ask Hyejin, going back to the subject of me not being a fifth wheel after all. Honestly, I’m scared to know what she has done.

“I invited one more person, okay? It’s my party, I can do what I want.”

“Not when you’re trying to set him up,” Yoongi laughs.

“What?”

“Told you he wouldn’t like it.”

“Wait, what?”

“See?”

“Set me up with whom?”

“Oh it’s not a set up,” she sighs. “I just invited Gayoon, that’s all.”

“Who’s Gayoon?” I ask.

“You don’t know Gayoon?” Byulyi asks in confusion.

“Should I?”

“Well, seeing as she’s one of the teachers in the kindergarten your kid goes to, yeah,” Yoongi laughs.

Wait, what? I go over the names and faces in my head and I am 99% sure I have never met any teacher with the name of Gayoon. And Eunmi doesn’t go to a big kindergarten.

“Okay, I don’t know if I’m an idiot but I honestly don’t know a Gayoon.”

“She works part time,” Hyejin shrugs. “Maybe you just never ran into her. She’s…” suddenly, Hyejin is interrupted by the doorbell. “Here.”

I’m still a bit taken aback by the set up – not set up that is going on but when I look around at Hyejin’s accomplices, all of them just shrug. Whatever she had in mind, she didn’t share too much with anyone. And she did say it’s not a set up.

“Guys, I really hope-“

“GAYOON!” I’m interrupted with the sound of Eunmi screaming from the top of her lungs and running through the hallway. I watch in confusion, hearing her laugh with someone – Gayoon, I suppose.

“You saw me yesterday Eunmi,” I hear laughter.

“I know but I want you to play with us,” Eunmi responds.

“Now Eunmi, don’t steal Gayoon from us,” Hyejin laughs, as she walks into the living room, followed by my sulking daughter and Gayoon.

Wait.

It’s Elsa.

“Hey guys,” she waves, looking around the living room, not even doing a double take. But I do.

It’s Elsa. The girl in the Elsa costume.

“Gayoon,” Hyejin speaks up, snapping me from the wait, I know that girl daze. “You’re frozen! Let’s get you warmed up. Do you want some mulled wine? It’ll warm you up in no time?” she gives the girl a fond look, rubbing her shoulders despite the jacket she is wearing.

“I need a warm up too, pour it up,” Byulyi jokes but offers her glass to her friend without a blink.

“Yes, please,” Gayoon responds, rubbing her hands together in an attempt to warm up. “It really got super cold outside. Oh, you’re new,” she suddenly looks at me. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize. I’m Gayoon,” she waves for a second, only to go back to warming up her hands.

“Jungkookie over here is Eunmi’s dad,” Namjoon elaborates before I have a chance to introduce myself.

“Oh,” she looks at me again, this time obviously focusing on my facial features. “I see the resemblance. Eunmi is a sweet kiddo. Nice to meet you, Jungkookie.”

“Jeongguk,” I flinch when I hear a complete stranger calling me by that nickname but she didn’t know any better. “Nice to meet you too,” I smile.

“How come you’ve never met before?” Yoongi asks, looking between the two of us.

“I’ve only ever met Eunmi’s mother,” Gayoon shrugs. Great, let’s talk about my ex now! “It shouldn’t be a surprise though; I’m usually done with work by the time kids get picked up. Thank you,” she smiles at Hyejin when she takes her mulled wine, before sitting down on the sofa next to Namjoon. “Now we know each other.”

“Um… we’ve actually met before,” I mumble, debating whether or not that is a piece of information I want to share. She frowns in confusion.

“Have we?”

“You were dressed as Elsa,” I explain, and watch as her confusion only grows. “Just some days ago, when I was going to pick up Eunmi from a birthday party-“

“Oh my god,” she gasps, suddenly remembering. Immediately, color rushes into her cheeks. “I am so sorry.”

“What have you done Gayoon?” Byulyi laughs at her.

“I cursed. A lot,” she closes her eyes, shaking her head. “I’m so sorry. That’s not how one wants to see their kid’s teacher. If it makes you feel any better, I am there only part time and I can assure you I have never ever, ever, used that kind of language around them. Shit, I’m so sorry. No, wait. Shit, no. Oh god, I’m just going to shut up,” she sighs before taking a sip of her wine and looking away.

We all laugh at her but the moment I see her shaking her head in shame, I feel bad. “Hey, come on, nothing to apologize for. Honestly, for a father, I have to be careful how I talk around her. If she blurts something out, she probably heard it from me, not you.”

“Ah, the never ending pain of watching your mouth,” Hyejin shakes her head as she scoots closer to Namjoon, who automatically throws an arm around her shoulders. Good lord, it’s sickening to watch just how well they work together. If I look at them any longer, I might just get green with envy. “I can’t wait for the day she grows up and knows what we say, why we say it and why she shouldn’t say it.”

“Here’s to double standards,” Yoongi raises his bottle of be and while we all laugh, we all raise our respective drinks too. Parenting is a never ending chain of double standards. You want your kid to do better than you but you also don’t want your kid to make the mistakes you did, all the while knowing that maybe, just maybe, you should let them do their own thing.

Thank god Eunmi is five and still needs my help when tying her shoes. When the day comes when she doesn’t want to listen to me, curses, makes mistakes I warn her about, I think I might just end up flinging myself from the top of a building. Thank god she’s still just five.

“How about we eat first, and then whine?” Namjoon suggests. “I’m starving!”

                                                            …

 A fancy dinner party was out of the question the moment Hyejin added ‘bring the kids’. There’s no way we can sit and have an adult conversation when we have chicken to cut.

“I feel like I have forgotten an accessory,” Gayoon chuckles and it takes us all a moment to realize what she refers to. She’s the only one without a kid – Namjoon has mashed potatoes over his hands while Hyejin is trying to tie their daughter’s hair. Yoongi is reaching for the carrots while Byulyi is trying to make space on Jia’s plate. And I’m ordered to cut the pieces smaller than I had cut them seconds ago. The accessory she’s referring to is a kid.

“Wanna change?” Byulyi glares at her, waving with a pea stuck on the fork. “Enjoy your freedom, woman.”

“Don’t threaten me with a pea,” Gayoon returns the glare. “But you’re all so cute.”

“No, Eunmi,” I sigh, taking the bread from her hands. “We don’t bite – we tear pieces,” I instruct before handing her the piece of bread back.

“But dad,” she looks up at me with confusion written all over her face. “You bite bread all the time.”

I can hear several attempts to cover laugher. Pretty positive I am red in the face, I smile down at Eunmi. “Not anymore I don’t. We’re nice and polite and we tear.”

“Okay,” she shrugs, proceeding to tear up the piece of bread in two.

“You two are so sweet together, you’re giving me cavities,” Gayoon comments, looking like she is about to burst into tears or at the very least let out a loud AWWWW.

Wait, she thinks we’re cute? Eunmi, of course, but me? Cute? Of all the things?

“Miss Gayoon, what are cavities?” Eunmi frowns at her.

“Sweetie, just Gayoon,” she corrects her. “No need to call me Miss when we’re not in kindergarten. And cavities… well, when you don’t wash your teeth right, they get all bad and black, which is why we need to wash them after every meal. The black things? Those are cavities. They make your teeth go bad,” she explains Eunmi with a sweet smile. Okay, maybe cute fits her too.

“Why would they give you cavities?” Jia peeks under her father’s arm.

“It’s something we say when someone is sweet,” Hyejin jumps in to save the day. “Gayoon meant that Eunmi and her dad look very sweet – because sweet food is not that good for your teeth.”

“Mom, does that mean I can’t have chocolate cake because my teeth will fall out?” Jiyoo looks at Hyejin in pure horror.

A collective, parent groan carries through the room.

Finally, after we finished our dinner, mostly composed from what the kids left on their plates when they were done, we slowly made our way back to the living room, sporadically checking in on the three little girls that were playing with their favorite toys. It’s our luck that the three of them truly get on well.

Namjoon wasn’t kidding when he said we will eat first, then whine.

Byulyi is still struggling with her insomnia, which is also affecting Yoongi’s insomnia so basically, the both of them end up spending way too much time with each other, insisting that now, they hate each other. And we all laugh, we all join in but whether the two of them are aware of it or not, Yoongi’s hand reaches for hers every few minutes, as if he can’t last without actually touching her.

Namjoon, Hyejin and I all have work worries, ranging from having a dick of a boss, not having enough work or simply feeling miserable at the end of every single day. The only one of us that seems to be faring well is Gayoon, who also happens to be the only one without a kid attached at her hip.

The girl is cute for sure, as I previously confirmed. She’s funny and fairly intelligent, able to keep up with Byulyi’s comebacks like a champ. She stood her ground quite well, whether the conversation was about child education, football or the latest slow cooker appliance.

“Sweetie, what is it with you?” Hyejin’s eyebrows furrow. “You look tired and a bit… out of it, I suppose.”

Tired? Out of it? She’s stunning!

Okay, I’m blowing it out of proportion. She isn’t Miss Universe or anything like that, but she has a sweet face and a pretty smile that makes her eyes wrinkle and dimples… okay, I’m stopping.

“It’s the stupid Christmas party,” she sighs, letting her head fall onto Byulyi’s shoulder. If I was to do that, she would push me right off. Byulyi is like that but for some reason, this girl has her whipped. “And we still don’t have the stupid Santa!”

“Oh no,” Namjoon raises his hands in protest. “No way. No way in hell. I was Santa last year and I swore on all that’s holy that I will never go into that suit again!”

“Namjoon, please-“ Gayoon starts.

“Nope. No way. Direct those puppy eyes to someone else, I’m not doing it,” Namjoon shakes his head.

“I mean, I guess I could do it,” Yoongi shrugs and we all are startled at the loud snort laugh that came from Byulyi.

“Yeah right,” she laughs. “You’re never going to be Santa ever again. You made three kids cry two years ago, need I remind you?”

“That kid called me an old fart when I said I’m not giving him a PlayStation!” Yoongi fights back.

“Yeah well, you, dressed as Santa, told him Santa is not real,” Byulyi jumps up. “You are permanently forbidden from being Santa Claus ever again. And by the way, you are an old fart.”

“You’re older than I am,” Yoongi rolls his eyes.

“And yet I am still fabulous.”

“The girl still doesn’t have a Santa, leave your marital bickering for later,” Hyejin rolls her eyes. “Who could-,” my blood freezes when she looks directly at me, a hint of a smirk appearing on her face. I try to beg her silently, I do my best to make her read my mind and not do it but the smirk only grows. “And what about Jungkookie? He could be Santa?” Hyejin strikes the last nail into my coffin.

“You could?” Gayoon looks at me, her eyes lighting up. “Please?” she begs me.

“I mean, I don’t know if-“

“Please?” she whines. “Please Jungkook, you’d be a life saver.”

“Yeah Jungkookie, be her lifesaver,” Namjoon chuckles and if the situation was any less obvious, I would have kicked him right then and there. Right in the jewels.

“Please?” Gayoon begs again. “I’m baking a shit tone of cookies and you’ll get to eat like… half of them?”

“Sold,” I blurt out, making all of them laugh. “If you said there was food involved, I would have volunteered instantly.”

Yeah, that’s a lie, but I might as well appear charming.

“Yay!” she smiles, clapping her hands together. “Just be there next Saturday, 10 o’clock, on the dot.”

Oh good lord, what have I done?

#bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #bts fluff #jungkook fluff #jungkook series #jeon jungkook #jungkook #jungkook smut #bts parent #single dad jungkook #bts #bts jungkook #bangtant #bangtan smut #bts jjk #jjk

[joon-bugs]

Crush

~I’m late (as usual) but this is in commemoration of Jungkook’s birthday! No matter what age he will always be our baby Kookie. Let me know if there are any ideas you guys have for future stories, and enjoy!~  

 ‘He looked so small kneeling at your feet. His grown out hair was pulled back into a low bun, a detail you had overseen previously. A few shorter strands hadn’t made the cut and were haphazardly strewn over his forehead, covering his wide doe eyes. The image would have been so innocent if not for your nakedness.’ 

word count: 3,268 

pairing: Jungkook/Reader 

genre: smut 

warnings: swearing, first time oral (male giving, female receiving), Taehyung being an ass, (more) couch staining, slight violence, baby boi Jungkook, slightly submissive Jungkook, unprotected sex 

If there was anything nice to say about Kim Taehyung, it was that he gave good head. Okay scratch that. He gave phenomenal head. He delivered toe curling pleasure like it was his damn job and knew it.  The only flaw with him was the fact he was a major ass. Taehyung or 'Taehoney' as he was dubbed, was a cocky bastard with a pretty face. He reveled in getting off men and women, collecting in the reward of bragging about it while receiving reverence and sometimes money from his classmates. Getting on his knees was a hobby that benefited him in more ways than one, and he was perfectly content to break down the recipient of his efforts. Today, it just so happened to be you. 

Honestly, you didn't know why Taehyung had given you the time of day. You weren't his type by any standard, preferring the silence and seclusion of the library to the rowdy atmosphere of your apartment. Having three roommates only sounded like a good idea from a money perspective. It didn't help they all liked to smoke and drink, which usually led to them inviting friends over. And being really really loud. So the library had thus become your hideaway, away from the world. 

Maybe one of your  roommates had told him about you, put you on his radar, painting a target on your back. That could have been the only explanation as to why he weaved through the rows of paperbacks, only to plop down at the furthest table, which you happened to be seated. All he had to do was smile and extend his hand. 

"I'm Taehyung. Nice to meet you." 

You were done for, caught in his net the moment he opened his mouth. 

Somehow in the span of an hour Taehyung convinced you to study at his place, ensuring you that his roommate would be out. Like a lamb to slaughter you agreed, your backpack seeming heavier as you followed him home. 

Taehyung was sly, quick to offer you a seat on the small loveseat, making no move to squeeze next to you. He instead crossed his legs, sinking to the floor by your feet. You were grateful for the space, the air already suffocating in the emptiness of the apartment. 

You'd just started to take out your things when a touch startled you, and you looked down only to see the red haired boy grinning, his fingers inching up your shorts. Maybe the whole situation would have been avoided if it was colder, if the weather called for sweatpants or a parka. Or maybe it was ineffable, fated by some twisted deity. Either way Taehyung had gotten between your legs, and it was taking all of your willpower not to scream. 

"Tae-Taehyung...I don't-understand." You panted through clenched teeth, tossing your head to the ceiling, your fists balled. He came up for air to bite a chunk of your thigh, and you released a sound between a shriek and a gasp. 

"There’s nothing to understand Y/N. Enjoy the ride baby." He laughed, enjoying himself. You canted your hips when he resumed his actions and latched onto his hair unconsciously. You glanced down to watch him work and marveled at the contrast between your skin and his fiery locks. The scarlet letter came to mind and you scoffed, thinking of the symbolism. Guess that made Taehyung a harlot. 

“What’s so funny hmm?” His eyes met yours and you turned red, noticing his dripping chin. Was all that really from you? 

“N-nothing. Just thinking.” You gave a half hearted reply, hoping it was enough. His lips poked out in a pout. 

“I would hope you were thinking about me..and I don’t think what I’m doing is very funny. I’d rather have you begging than laughing.” He sounded upset. 

“Tae-“ 

“Time to work more of my magic then.” 

Taehyung grabbed your butt and yanked you closer, your thighs cradling his skull. He wrapped his lips around your clit suddenly and sucked hard. You yelped, back bowing off the couch, mouth open, eyes wide. He chuckled, the air stimulating you further. 

“That’s more like it sweetheart. Show me how you fall apart.” He lowered his voice, sending chills up your spine. The noises that followed were absolutely sinful, loud and obscene. Your legs were beginning to shake, the coil in your belly tightening. Taehyung’s nails dug into your thighs and you just knew there would be marks. You took in a big breath, the pressure rising. 

“I think I’m-“ 

“What the hell?! 

You shot up, pulling Taehyung’s hair to get him off. He resisted at first, content to continue despite the audience, until he realized you weren’t letting up. He sighed loudly and looked over his shoulder, still holding you spread eagle. 

“Oh you’re back early. Game finish early Kook?” Taehyung had a bored tone, a complete 180 from his earlier persona. You furrowed your brow at the nickname. Why did it sound so familiar..? You slowly scanned your eyes up the newcomer’s legs, taking in the toned definition of their thighs, all the way up to a pronounced chest and wide neck. You noticed the scar on his cheek and the small mole on his chin. Oh god. It was Jeon Jungkook. The best athlete on campus who so happened to be your biggest crush. Your crush who had just witnessed you getting tongue fucked by his roommate. You should’ve ran. If not for the mortification burning through your blood, you would have. 

Jungkook grit his teeth, glaring daggers at Taehyung who gave him a cheeky grin. 

“Sorry you caught me in the middle of something. Let me finish up then we can get lunch.” He talked as if he were discussing the weather. Jungkook dropped the duffel bag he'd been holding and charged forward to wrench Taehyung back by his shoulders. He fell on his back with a thud, the impact hard enough for a side table to shake. 

“What the f-” 

“You’re a real piece of shit ya know that?!” Jungkook yelled, standing over Taehyung with his hands in tight fists. You’d never seen the younger look so angry before. Taehyung scowled before standing to brush off his pants. 

“What’s the problem man? You act like this is the first time you’ve walked in on me working.” Working? It's not like I’m paying him. 

“That’s what this is? Bullshit. You’re telling me she came to you? That’s low even for you.” Jungkook got in his roommate’s face, breathing heavily. You wondered why he was so upset. 

“What? Hard to believe miss goody two shoes would ask for my services? I mean-” Taehyung scoffed, looking proud, “Could you blame her?” The situation was getting way out of hand and you chatised yourself for ever coming to the apartment. You crossed your ankles and shivered, debating on snatching up your shorts, but too afraid to move. 

“Im gonna beat your ass.” Jungkook’s threat was quiet and firm.  Despite only being able to see the back of Taehyung’s head you imagined the giant eye roll he gave Jungkook. 

“Oooo what a tough guy. Grow up Jeon. Tell me the real reason you're mad. It's because I can do what you can't. Make a girl come on my tong-” Taehyung’s head quickly connected with the drywall as his body was slammed up against it. You felt the weight of the attack as if it was aimed at you. Fistfuls of Taehyung’s shirt was bunched and twisted in Jungkook’s grasp, the two roommate's faces nose to nose.                    

“You knew damn well I would be home early, I should-” 

“What? Hit me? C’mon show us what a real man you are.” Taehyung licked his lips, enjoying his taunting. You saw Jungkook’s jaw twitch and knew you had to step in. 

“Wait! Don’t..don’t.” You pleaded lamely, becoming red as the two men turned to stare. Jungkook seemed to soften and hesitated a moment before shoving himself away from Taehyung. 

“Cute Jeon. Real cute.” Taehyung chuckled, adjusting his clothes. He fixed up the mussed section of his hair and tossed you a wink, before turning towards the door. 

“Sorry I couldn’t finish you off Y/N. But maybe Kook could help you out..” He threw the words over his shoulder, slamming the door behind him, leaving the apartment silent once more. Jungkook’s gaze was glued to Taehyung’s disappearing form for a moment and you took this time to bend down to grab your pants, trying to be as subtle as possible. You began to undo the row of buttons on the front but paused after hearing Jungkook mutter. 

“Are you..okay?” You were hesitant to ask and flinched when the boy’s head whipped around and his eyes bore into yours. Your earlier task forgotten, all you could do was stare back, watching as Jungkook mumbled something else under his breath, seeming distracted. 

“S-sorry for being here, I’ll just go.” His attention was making you nervous and it didn’t help that your lower half was exposed. It was not how you wanted your first encounter with him to go. His look turned hard then and he clenched his jaw, approaching you swiftly. You jumped back, pressing your body further into the couch, head dizzy at the unexpected move. Oh god he must be really mad. You anticipated that he would yell and throw you out, never to speak to you again. Clenching your eyes you waited, breath held. 

“I’ll show him.” The words were soft, quiet. You slowly opened your eyes, confused for a second, not seeing Jungkook in front of you. It was only when you felt a waft of warm air graze your legs, did you realize where he had gone. 

He looked so small kneeling at your feet. His grown out hair was pulled back into a low bun, a detail you had overseen previously. A few shorter strands hadn’t made the cut and were haphazardly strewn over his forehead, covering his wide doe eyes. The image would have been so innocent if not for your nakedness. And his staring. Right at your crotch. 

“Um..Jungkook?”  

“He did this to get back at me.” He said, leaning forward, letting his fingertips travel up your legs. You clenched them, keeping them closed for modesty’s sake. Omg Jeon Jungkook is touching me omg omg. You were internally losing your cool. Jungkook continued. 

“He can never just take an apology, always gotta act like a dick-” 

“Taehyung?” You were baffled at the lack of context to his rambling. He paused in his exploration, but his eyes never moved. 

“He knew I liked you Y/N. That’s why he wanted to get you here alone.” Shame flooded your face and you gasped audibly, realizing just how big of a dumbass you were. 

“You..like me?” Probably not anymore you whore. 

He looked up at you then and gave you a shy smile, looking much younger than you knew he was. 

“Y-Yeah. I was..too shy to tell you.” He looked away, reverting his attention back to your closed privates. Who would have thought someone as outgoing and sporty as Jungkook would actually be bashful? 

“I like you too Jungkook.” The confession escaped your mouth faster than you could think and you waited with baited breath, wondering how he might react. What you weren’t expecting was for him to heave a huge sigh and plant a kiss to the top of your leg. 

“Good.” He breathed, warming your skin, while his free hands circled your knees. You bit your bottom lip, trying not to release any noises. The warmth moved high, dangerously close to your core. You wrapped your arms around yourself, both embarrassed and turned on. 

“Can I make you feel good Y/N? Can I touch you?” Jungkook seemed nervous himself now, his voice wavering. Yes. God yes. Is what you wanted to say. You ended up with something a little less eloquent. 

“Um..sure. Make me feel good Kookie.” His eyes flashed at the nickname and he parted your legs open in a single move. Cold air assaulted your nether regions and you shivered, feeling your wetness already cooling. Jungkook hesitantly ran a finger up your folds, swiping some of the arousal pooling there. You flinched at his touch, watching as he brought the coated limb to his lips, poking his tongue out to taste. 

“Wow. That’s how you taste.” With his voice neutral you were unsure whether he was complimenting you or if he was disgusted. You soon got an idea of what his answer would be when Jungkook lowered his head, picking up where Taehyung left off. 

His inexperience was obvious by the hesitant flicks of his tongue and by the lack of rhythm in his ‘technique.’ Nevertheless tingles started to surface within you and you squirmed at the feeling. 

“Am I hurting you?” Jungkook looked up at you with a concerned expression, eyelashes nearly brushing the bottom of his eyebrow. You swallowed and shook your head, unbelieving of what was happening. How he could manage to look so cute while he was going down on you was a mystery. 

“I’ve never..done this before.” He admitted after a pause, his cheeks dusting with color. 

“I could help you, if-if that’s cool. You can stop-” 

“No. I want too Y/N. Just tell me what to do.” God you shouldn’t have felt such a rush at his compliance but you did. You guided him back down, finding enough confidence to place your hand on his head. A sudden thought popped into your mind. 

“Hey Jungkook? Could you maybe undo your bun? I want to touch your hair.” He’s gonna think you’re a freaking weirdo now great. 

Wordlessly he removed the elastic without pause, flinging the tie across the room without coming up for air. You let out a trembling breath, weaving your fingers through his hair, marveling at its softness. Jungkook hummed, sending a shock of vibrations and you bucked into his face, nails digging into his scalp. 

“Oh!” Gasping for breath you tried to control the rocking of your hips, eyes swiveling in every direction to find something to lock onto too, until they settled on the man on the ground. His own body was reacting similar to yours, lower part pressing up against the couch. He was humping the furniture like a dog in heat and you felt your arousal grow at his neediness. When his lips discovered the small bundle of nerves and started sucking you hissed through your teeth, clenching your jaw so tight it hurt. At this rate you were going to come hard and fast. 

Jung-ah! Kook!” The heaving of your chest distorted your exclamation but he seemed to hear you. 

“Are you okay? Did I hurt you?” His pupils were blown, dark enough to match his hair. The ceiling light caught the reflection of your juices on his chin and you could only conjure up images of everywhere else you wanted his mouth to be. 

“N-no. Please Jungkook. I need you up here.” Now who’s the needy one? 

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea I’m..” Hard. 

“I know. I know.” You grasped his face and coaxed him to join you, bringing your lips together messily, not minding the taste of yourself on him. He was still before coming alive, grasping the back of your neck to intensify the kiss. It was sloppy and loud but you were burning from the inside out, Jungkook a craving you had dreamed of indulging in. You pulled him down on top of you, your head meeting the armrest. In this position you could feel his straining length on your bare thigh and you were grateful you were already prepped. Otherwise there was no way he was fitting inside you without it being painful. You reached down to palm him through the joggers, feeling him twitch and lean into your touch. 

“I know this is so sudden and I literally just confessed but can I-ah-fuck you?” He was huffing, breath raspy and hot on the shell of your ear. His politeness only made him more endearing, and you laughed. 

“Yes. Please.” 

With your spoken consent Jungkook hastily shimmied his pants off, revealing he wasn’t wearing any underwear. You stared at the mass before you, watching as it curved to rest on his hoodie. The tip was leaking, the rest of him red and ready. Jungkook saw your expression and froze. 

“If you aren’t sure Y/N-” 

You wrapped a hand around him to silence him and he choked, only coming back into himself when you positioned him at your entrance. 

“Fuck me or I’ll call Taehyung to do it for you.”  

Jungkook slammed home, spurned on by your taunting and your mouth fell open in a silent scream. He was big. Bigger than you initially thought, and tears sprang in the corner of your eyes at the harsh intrusion. Jungkook began to thrust sharply, couch groaning under the fast movements. He had his eyes closed, lip captured between his teeth, completely lost in the moment. You hit his arm until he refocused on you, blinking away the wetness in your eyes. 

“Ah-let me-ah-on top. You’re too big.” Jungkook looked apologetic and pulled out, rolling over quickly. His whole body twitched, as if he was still inside you, sweat caked on his skin.

You brought your knees onto the side of his and took him in your hands once more, easing yourself down inch by excruciating inch until he was bottomed out, and you were full. Jungkook jerked then, hitting a spot that had you cry out and you begged for him to do it again. He grabbed your hips hesitantly, only gripping you tighter when you rocked against him, desperate for the friction. Soon the two of you were panting and grinding, tugging on the tops that remained but eventually giving up because neither of you could stand to be any more patient. Jungkook watched through lidded eyes as you bounced on him, letting on high whines that mimicked your own. You were getting tired, nowhere near as athletic as he was and started to slow, panting but trying to reach your end. Jungkook seemed to know of your dilemma because he planted his feet and increased his pace, ramming into you harder and faster than before. You held on to the front of his hoodie, unable to meet his thrusts anymore, only holding on as he brought you both to climax. 

You came first, your inner walls fluttering around him as you threw your head back, letting the intense orgasm wash over you. You collapsed on Jungkook’s chest, body spasming as he let out a yell, thrusting two, three more times, before finishing deep inside you. You felt the warmth of his seed and thanked god for the birth control you had started taking on a whim. Not that having a child with Jeon Jungkook was an unappealing idea. 

Your mouth was lead, thick and dry in your mouth, your limbs jelly. Holy shit I just slept with my crush and it was amazing. You cuddled his hoodie, despite how hot you felt , sighing in content when his arm came to pull you closer. 

“Hey Y/N.” 

“Hm?” 

“Want to grab lunch after this?” 

“Is this you asking me on a date?” You smiled, suppressing a chuckle. There was a pause. 

“Yeah. I am.” He did laugh, and you silently thanked Taehyung for bringing you two together, even if it hadn’t been under the best circumstances. 

Written by Rose 

#bts #bts one shot #bts smut #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #happy birthday jungkook #smut #bts jeon jungguk #bangtan seonyeondan #kim namjoon #rm #kim seokjin #jin #min yoongi #suga #jung hoseok #hobi #park jimim #chim chim #kim taehyung #v #jeon jeongkook #kookie

[pengychan]

[Coco] Best Man

Title: Best Man Summary: Ernesto couldn't understand what was it about Imelda that his best friend found so amazing. By the time he could, it was too late. [Modern setting, written for @appatary8523​] Characters: Ernesto de la Cruz, Imelda Rivera, Héctor Rivera. Imector, onesided Ernesto/Imelda. Rating: K

A/N: Appa asked for a serving of one-sided pining with some she's-about-to-marry-my-best-friend sprinkled on top, and I complied. Had a lot of fun with it, too. 

***

“Food poisoning.”

“Yes, I heard you the first seven times. I was actually the one who told you--”

“One time you go out of town on your own since last year, one time, and my husband winds up in the hospital with food poisoning!”

“Look, I tried to tell him that chorizo didn’t look all that great, but he was hungry and--”

“And so you just let him eat it while you steered well clear of it!”

“What, since when is it my responsibility to watch what he eats?” Ernesto huffs, throwing up his arms with dramatic flair. A guy sitting on the other end of the waiting room blinks blearily at him, clearly hungover. “Am I my brother's keeper?” 

Imelda rolls her eyes, but her lips curl upwards for the briefest moment, and Ernesto mentally marks it as a victory. “I’m not sure what made you think quoting Cain would come off as perfectly innocent.”

“All right, you got me. I tried to poison him. My plan was to leave him in a ditch and run off with his iPad and all the songs in it. So I could make it big, be a star, never think of him again.”

“Very funny.” A pause. “... Do you have it? The iPad? Because the last thing Héctor is gonna need is getting out of here to find out it’s gone.”

“Yes, yes, I have it. And the guitar. All in the car. Which might have a couple of new bumps...”

“What?”

“He was all green in the face, I panicked that he’d throw up again and hurried to the hospital.”

“Like cleaning our car would have been your problem.”

“No, but if he’d thrown up then I would have thrown up and probably crashed.”

“... Fair,” Imelda condedes with a sigh, and leans back on her seat. Ernesto leans back on his own, reaching up to fix his hair with a hand, turning to glance at the mute TV screen in the corner - anything to avoid looking at her. 

It’s better this way.

***

When he and Imelda met, Ernesto took slightly less than two minutes and a half to decide she was a dumb girl and he didn’t like her. 

To be fair, at age twelve he still found all girls to be dumb girls he didn’t like. That would partly change in the next several years - some girls were dumb, he’d declare then, but not in their face he did like them very much - but right there and then, there was nothing about Imelda he liked. And that was, he’d insist, in no way related to the fact she’d shown up out of nowhere, three years younger, and shattered his record by making a rock skip across the stream sixteen times.

The look of pure wonder Héctor had given her, the one that was usually reserved to him when he pulled out something, had been the last straw. Ernesto had immediately declared her a dumb girl and made sure Héctor promised not to talk to her, ever, lest he wanted to catch dumb girl cooties. His friend, who was eight and not especially bright - Ernesto would deny thinking that later on - had seemed a bit saddened, but he hadn’t argued, because he never argued with him. 

And, at least officially, he’d kept his word for a few years, until they were all older and even Ernesto had to grudgingly concede that it was a stupid promise and dumb girls cooties were not a thing. In truth, he’d actually been talking with her without him knowing, because he found her amazing for some reason Ernesto couldn’t comprehend. 

By the time he could, it was too late.

***

“Ay, Imelda, mi amor, mi vida. Come close to hear my last words--”

“Your next words had better be ‘sorry for being that idiota who gets food poisoning a week before the wedding, I will be back on my feet by then’.”

On the hospital bed, his skin still a rather unhealthy ashen shade, Héctor grins like a boy caught with his fingers in the cookie jar. “I’ll marry on my deathbed if I must.”

A roll of her eyes, a smile she can barely hide. “Ay, you’re so dramatic.”

“Ernesto’s fault,” Héctor’s declares, causing Ernesto, still standing in the doorway - he let Imelda have the chair beside the bed, ever the gentleman - to protest.

“Wait, what?”

“You rubbed off me!” Héctor declares, dramatically.

Ernesto throws up his arms. Dramatically. “Oh, sure. Blame me for everything, why don’t you,” he huffs. “Maybe I’m too dramatic to be your best man, too.”

Héctor laughs. “Ah, never. There is no one else I’d ever pick to be my best man at the wedding.”

Lucky me.

The thought is bitter as bile and maybe something shows on his face; Héctor’s expression doesn’t change, but Imelda’s does. She doesn’t quite scowl, but her gaze is more attentive, and it is enough to make Ernesto feel like he’s under a spotlight… and not the kind he enjoys.

“... I’ll go get a drink,” he mutters, leaving quickly and realizing just a bit too late that a hospital is not the right place to go looking for alcohol. At least, not the kind you’re supposed to drink.

All right then, coffee. Coffee it is.

There is a café at least, and the coffee is halfway decent. He sits, takes out his phone, checks his emails and notifications-- ah, looks like a few people showed interest in his profile across a couple of dating apps. Three women, one man. Not bad at all when what you need is a boost to your ego. Two are nothing to write home about, the other two are… worth considering. Maybe later, after the end of next week once the wedding is done, Héctor and Imelda will be off to their honeymoon in Guatemala, and he will probably need some pleasurable company. And alcohol.

Large amounts of it.

***

“I really don’t get what you see in her.”

Ernesto’s grumble was met with a dreamy smile, a slow strum of a guitar’s strings. “Well, first of all, she-- hey!” he yelped when a tangerine smacked against his forehead and then fell back down on the floor with a sound that was more like a splat then a thud.

“That wasn’t a real question, cabrón,” Ernesto grumbled again. He sat back against an empty crate, watching as the vendors began to dismantle around them, another market day over. Soon enough the plaza would be mostly empty, before it filled again with people after dark. “And anyway, she’s not your type.”

“She is exactly my type!”

“And what is, pray tell, your type?”

The question caused Héctor to turn deep red and stammer, as though entirely out of words despite the fact he could always find all the right ones when sitting alone in a quiet room, a blank piece of paper in front of him. “W-well… she is smart, and… and beautiful…”

“That’s everyone’s type,” Ernesto snorted. “No one likes women dumb and ugly. Just dumb, maybe, but not ugly, unless you’re really that desperate and the lights are out...”

“That’s not-- ugh. If Sofía could hear you, she’d smack you over the head and you’d deserve it.”

“I’m just telling it how it is.”

“She’s… not like other girls!”

Ernesto made a face. “That line, really? Now you’re the one who’d be getting a smacking while being asked what’s wrong with other girls.”

Héctor’s face flushed crimson. “That’s not what I meant! I-- all right, that was-- not what I meant,” he repeated lamely. “She’s not like… anyone else. To me.”

“Oh?”

“She has this thing, like a… a spark, like--”

“Drive,” Ernesto muttered, without thinking. His fingers went to better tune his guitar, while Héctor nodded, brightening up. 

“Yes, exactly! She wants to accomplish something - start her own business someday - and she’s ready to work for it, and--”

And she won’t let anyone tell her she can’t do it.

“-- and I’m sure she can do anything she wants to do, she’s just like that, you know?”

“... Guess I know someone a bit like that,” Ernesto conceded, and tuned out any further gushing from Héctor’s part. All right, so maybe he could sort of see Héctor’s point with Imelda; she had ambition and drive and wouldn’t let anybody dictate what she could or could not do, and he could admire that. Plus she had turned out beautiful, which in his not-so-humble opinion helped.

There was hardly any pretty girl in Santa Cecilia Ernesto hadn’t hit on, often with some success, but not her. He had the uncomfortable feeling it would result in rejection; while he’d been rejected before, it was never a big deal because to each their own and some just have no taste. 

With Imelda, he suspected it might be different. He suspected it might actually hurt, and maybe it would be best to just… not find out whether or not it would be the case. 

It was just stupid. He would make a point to ignore her until it went away, that was all. Not that Héctor behaving like a crushing puppy helped, but that would pass, too; she was not his type. He’d either let go of his crush, or be burned, whine a little, and then move on. Simple as that.

Héctor couldn’t possibly be her type.

***

“What’s eating you?”

“Gah!” 

Ernesto recoils, the phone flying out of his hands. It slides across the table, and Imelda catches it before it falls off. Ernesto has precisely half a second to hope she didn’t get a look at the screen before she hands it back to him, an eyebrow raised. 

“Who’s María del Carmen?”

“A potential date,” Ernesto mutters, snatching the phone from her hand. He hopes Imelda isn’t going to press the matter, but of course she does.

“You can invite her to the wedding. You can still pick a guest to come with you.”

Yes, great first date idea. Sitting there with a stranger to watch you marry my best friend.

The thought leaves a bitter taste in his mouth, but Ernesto manages to fake a laugh convincingly enough. “Hah! Not my idea of a first date,” he says, swiping left as discreetly as possible before he locks the screen. “How’s Héctor?”

“Better, I think. Contrite enough. They’re keeping him under observation for the night.”

“Ugh. Here goes the plan to drive back this evening.” Ernesto makes a face. “How did you get here, anyway? We had the car.”

“I got a taxi.”

“How much did it cost--”

“Don’t ask. I’m doing my best not to think of that,” Imelda says, and they both chuckle. 

“Heh. Fair,” Ernesto concedes. “There is a motel right by. I’ll pay for two rooms. Before we go, can I offer you a--” he pauses, and turns to glance at what the small café has to offer. He makes a face. “... A coke, I guess?”

“I’d like that. With ice and lemon, thanks,” Imelda says, then leans forward. “Are you all right? You looked odd back there. Not food poisoning odd, but--”

“I’m fine,” Ernesto says, waving his hand dismissively. “Worried about the idiota I got myself as my best friend, I guess. I’ll get you that coke, and then we go get some sleep.”

They drink their cokes under the franky depressing neon lights of the hospital’s café, making small talk about the weather and music and whatnot; to Ernesto’s relief, no mention is made of the upcoming wedding. They drive-- well, Imelda drives them to the motel, all without incident.

Then, of course, the universe just has to make a big fat joke at his expense. 

“Only one room left, I’m afraid.”

Ah, for fuck’s sake. 

“I’ll take that for her. I’ll go sleep in the car,” he adds, holding out his hand for the key. She hesitates, glancing at guy behind the desk.

“No other rooms at all?”

“I’m afraid not. But it does have twin beds, if that suits you…?”

“Absolutely not,” Ernesto snaps at him. “The keys. I’ll sleep on the backseat, plenty of space.”

“It’s two separate beds, I think I can put up with it for a few hour--”

Well, I can’t. Not for one minute.

“Share a room with the future bride of my best friend?” Ernesto tries to grin like he finds the thought funny. “No can do, señorita. That’s a recipe for disaster.”

“Oh, come on,” she mutters, rolling her eyes. “You’ve seen too many movies. Héctor wouldn’t think for a second anything unbecoming happened.”

I know. That makes it worse.

“I’d really rather sleep in the car,” Ernesto insists. “Good form, no?”

A sigh, but she eventually relents and hands him the keys. “If you insist. But I won’t sit through endless complaints about your aching back during the drive back to Santa Cecilia, am I clear?”

“Crystal,” Ernesto says; somehow he manages to keep up the smile. He puts his card down to pay for the room and after a quick ‘goodnight’ he heads outside, breathing in the cool night air.

There is a bottle of beer beneath the passenger seat, much too warm to be really enjoyable, but he opens it and gulps it all down anyway, sprawled on the backseat of Héctor’s car. Within a week, the car will take the bride to church - bumps and scrapes and all - and then drive off the newlyweds towards their honeymoon, leaving him behind to watch them go. They will be back, eventually, but they will be man and wife and Ernesto will need to live with that.

They’ve been an item for years. He ought to be used to it. It shouldn’t keep him awake.

We would never work, he thinks, we'd drive each other insane within months.

That's probably true, he knows, and thinking like that usually helps. Not tonight.

He wishes he had another beer or two or twenty at hand.

***

“Are you drunk?”

“Drunk with happiness, yes!”

“A date, you.”

“Yes!”

“With Imelda.”

“Yes!!”

Ignoring the sting of what he refused to identify as jealousy, Ernesto frowned. “You’re joking.”

“I would never!” Héctor laughed and did a half-twirl that almost ended in a tumble. “On Saturday! There is this movie that came out on Día de los Muertos, according to the critics Hollywood didn’t butcher the whole thing too much, and she wants to see it and I want to see it and so--”

“I wanted to see it too! You said we’d--” Ernesto tried to protest, despite the fact no such thing was discussed and he wasn’t very interested in the movie anyway. But this time, maybe for the very first time, Héctor entirely ignored Ernesto’s words. 

In the end, Ernesto just zoned out, telling himself it would be their only date, anyway. It would not last. It couldn’t last, and Ernesto would just let it run his course, only showing up at the end to help Héctor with his heartbreak, as any good amigo would do.

It was not their only date. Many more dates followed, then a relationship that, despite all the ups and downs, never caused the heartbreak Ernesto had expected. When Héctor decided to propose, his advice to wait fell to deaf ears; when he returned with a smile from ear to ear to let him know she had said yes, his words of congratulations and jabs about marriage being the end of carefree life sounded dull to his own ears. 

But he said them anyway and, when Héctor asked him to be his best man, he immediately accepted. He had to.

It was what any good amigo would do.

***

“I think I’ll write a song about the past two days.”

“Oh?”

“El Chorizo Envenenado!”

“It doesn’t sound especially promising.”

Sitting on the couch with a book in his hands while Ernesto stays sprawled on the armchair - his back is killing him and he’s exhausted after barely sleeping, so he’ll take some time to recover at Héctor’s place before he goes home - Héctor pouts.

“And that is why I’m the songwriter,” he mutters, gaining himself a scoff and little else. Ernesto is half-considering a nap when the door opens and Imelda walks in, fresh out of the shower, wet hair covered with a towel and wrapped in a fluffy bathrobe that is too large to belong to anyone but Héctor. It should be the most unflattering attire imaginable, but she looks beautiful in it because of course she does.  

It would be a good time to leave, but Ernesto finds he cannot tear his eyes away as she sits next to his best friend - the love of her life, he can see it so clearly now, in the soft look she gives him and the way she rests her head on his shoulder. 

“What are you reading?”

“Marriage for dummies,” Héctor replies, and she laughs softly, a sound Ernesto cannot quite recall hearing before. Héctor must have heard it many times, will hear it many more times.

This is meant to last, he can tell it now. His best friend, and the woman he finds himself loving against all good judgment. And he’ll keep a smile on, be his best man and toast to their union, because that’s what a good amigo does and the show must go on even if something in his chest hurts so much he fears it might break. But he stays, pretending to be snoozing, watching them through eyelids barely cracked open, an intruder trying to get a glimpse of that beauty, to hear more of that secret laugh.

Maybe he should have tried, Ernesto thinks, seized his moment and asked her out first - but a voice in the back of his mind, much more practical, reminds him it would have made no difference; that even if he’d tried, the almost certain outcome would have been a no. There was never a moment to seize, and he isn’t sure whether that is supposed to make him feel better or hurt worse. 

Somehow, it cuts both ways.

#pixar coco #ernesto de la cruz #imelda rivera #hector rivera #coco

[stevenuniversallyreviews]

Episode 126: The Good Lars

“Maybe I should be trying to fix my life.”

The Good Lars is a massive bummer, and it makes me so, so happy.

Lars has always been a character with a ton of potential that, in my mind, is muted by his inability to learn. Pretty much all of his focus episodes have been about him taking a big step towards his character growing, but then resetting to his typical jerky self in his next episode instead of actually continuing that growth. On a rational level I can appreciate the realism in a stubborn character’s inflexibility, but even if it’s by design, it’s super frustrating to watch. The Good Lars shows that he still has a long way to go, and pointedly lacks the Lars Learns conclusion that Lars episodes like to bait us with, but this is where it finally feels like his story is going somewhere.

The New Lars was apparently the first step that stuck: seeing everyone, including his parents, prefer Steven-as-Lars to Lars-as-himself must’ve been a wake-up call. I love his final speech in that episode about hating how weird Beach City is, as it casts a surprising new light on his surly attitude, but after so many false starts we need some follow-through to make that speech fully land, and The Good Lars fits the bill.

Right off the bat, we see Lars take a genuine risk and put his food out there for Steven to try. We’ve known since all the way back in Lars and the Cool Kids that Lars’s apathy is a practiced act, and it’s hindered him again and again and again in every relationship he has. And we’ve known since Island Adventure that he’s a skilled cook, so it’s not a stretch that his abilities extend to baking. That he’d hide just how much he likes making food is totally in line with what we know about him, so it’s gigantic that he opens up about it here.

Steven is a terrific test subject for Lars’s food, as beyond his general kindness and enthusiasm, we’ve already seen him praise Lars’s food before in Island Adventure. The problem is that Lars is aware of this, which allows his self-destructive nature to undermine his sense of accomplishment in seeing someone love his baking. There’s not much critical value in praise from someone who only ever provides praise, and when presented with an opportunity to take an even bigger risk by letting the Cool Kids try his food, Lars flounders.

He may be growing, but he’s still cagey and irate. He takes a big step, but he’s too afraid to leap. But because he might move forward at last, because he might change his status quo on a show where the status quo is more than capable of changing, Steven and Sadie and the audience are given room to hope. Just enough room to hurt us when he can’t go through with it.

That fragile sense of hope radiating throughout The Good Lars is amplified by its status as the calmest episode in the show’s third act. It’s just so quiet compared to its surroundings, with no major confrontations by virtue of Lars’s pivotal moment of cowardice occurring off-screen. Our happy scenes are tinged with melancholy, and our sad scenes have glimpses of joy, and it’s the perfect tone to set for our last moment of peace before Steven’s life falls apart again.

All of my issues with Lars over the past 120-odd episodes are given new meaning as we see him waver back and forth in The Good Lars. Yes, it’s annoying that he refuses to retain lessons he learns throughout the series, but we see here that his dismal self-confidence doesn’t allow him to trust that he’d be accepted for who he is, so of course he falls back on prickliness over and over again.

To be fair, it’s hard to tell where he stands with Buck, who seems to enjoy messing with Lars but who also seems to genuinely appreciate Lars, but who also might only genuinely appreciate Lars out of irony because that’s totally a thing Buck would do, but who also might love irony so much that his ironic appreciation of Lars might wrap back around to genuine appreciation. It’s awesome that we see Buck in his Shirt Club tee showing off the guitar skills he picked up from taking lessons with Greg; referencing an episode that explored the downside of Buck’s allergy to sincerity paints Lars’s own attempts to hide how he feels in a damning light. Even we the audience can’t be sure if Buck thinks Bingo Bongo is “transcendent” because he likes it or he thinks it’s dumb and that it’s funny to say that it’s great. I'm pretty sure it’s the former, but from the episode alone there’s just no way to be sure.

So it makes sense that Buck, whose mastery of the detached facade is undeniable, is an aspirational figure for Lars, who’s uncannily bad at playing it cool. As much as I’ve praised the Cool Kids for being far more delightful than the Cool Kid trope often allows, they’re not without their flaws: it’s a little stinging that they still use terms like “Donut Kids” and “Donut Girl” instead of real names with their ostensible peers (but then again, they’re often referred to as “The Cool Kids”). Nobody, not even Lars, is fully to blame for Lars’s insecurity, but Buck’s affected demeanor sets a poor example for a kid who puts him on a pedestal.

Lars’s wavering consumes the first half of the episode, and throughout the baking montage we get shots like the above, where Steven and Sadie are capable of relaxing but Lars is obsessed with getting things right. It’s refreshing to see him so passionate, but this obsession is just another manifestation of his insecurity, his need to be perfect so that he’ll fit in. There’s a subtle cultural element to his ordeal, as ube is a traditional Philippine dessert that Lars writes off as “my family’s weird purple cake”—while I somehow doubt the Cool Kids are racist against Filipinos, it tracks that a kid who’s desperate to fit in would fear anything that sets him apart.

Still, it’s a pleasant sequence where Lars lets his guard down, first in the joy of baking and then as he opens up to Steven. His opinion that baking is lame is perhaps the most adolescent aspect of this very teenagey episode, because it’s an absurd notion which he believes so strongly that he can’t seem to fathom that it’s about the coolest skill you can bring to a group whose idea of a good time is a potluck. Lars thinks he’s lame, and he loves baking, thus he thinks baking is lame. His lack of self-worth even extends to people who like him, as he casually asserts that nobody knows he likes to bake when Sadie and Steven are right there; it’s a rotten thing to say, sure, but it comes from a severe confidence shortage.

Lars’s attitude is simple to understand early the series: he’s insecure, so he acts like a jerk to hide his soft interior. But The New Lars and now The Good Lars thrive by diving deeper and showing just how bad his self-esteem issues really are. This isn’t run-of-the-mill teen angst, it’s the kind of depression he describes in Island Adventure, and when we understand how much he’s suffering he suddenly fits right in with Pearl and Lapis Lazuli at their worst. This is what we needed of him for his big moment in space to hit home, so thank goodness we get it right on time.

Steven’s pep talk seems to do the trick, and we move into our third act with that bubble of hope just waiting to be popped. It becomes clear pretty quickly that something’s gonna go wrong when Steven excitedly amps up the ube, and seeing Sadie alone hammers the hard truth home, but before we make it official there’s a lovely moment of Sadie, who’s no stranger to awkwardness herself, quickly winning over the Cool Kids. I’ll never get tired of how great these kids are, and even Sadie will talk about it soon enough.

The search scene is a fascinating montage, showing Steven failing over and over but accompanied by a jaunty score that keeps our hopes alive despite what’s now an obvious conclusion. Steven’s leap into the air is the first big moment of the episode that involves weird Gem stuff, and its sudden appearance highlights how down-to-earth our little adventure has been; in the same way, his instinct to use mind powers is soon trumped by the human pragmatism of just calling Lars. It sets the stage for an all-too-human resolution to Lars’s story, as Steven’s phone call ends with him finding the ube in the trash right outside Buck’s house, right as he’s imagining aloud a reality where Lars lets himself be happy.

Which leads to our story’s greatest trick, the aspect that cements it as one of my favorites: despite the name and the deep focus and the new insights we gain from that focus, The Good Lars was never a Lars Episode. It’s a Sadie Episode, and it’s a beautiful one.

Sadie, like Lars, is afraid to branch out. But unlike Lars, she’s brave enough to try anyway, and shares her hidden love of singing with the Cool Kids. She’s so invested in helping others that she forgets that she’s allowed to help herself, and if that sounds familiar it’s because it’s Steven’s entire character arc. When the mood dips to its lowest point with the ube in the garbage, we could’ve had an ending that matches the sadness of a hurting kid failing even when his friends believe in him. But instead, we get a scene of quiet grace as Sadie shares her voice and is praised in the way Lars strove for. She hears that he’s not coming, and takes a deep breath, and lets it be. She can’t control his night, but she can control hers, and she chooses her own happiness instead of letting his issues ruin her evening.

She and Steven have both accepted Lars for who he is, and while both want him to move past the barriers he’s set up, the lessons of Sadie’s Song return with a vengeance in a way that makes me wish so badly that I liked Sadie’s Song. Steven has traces of his worst self from that story by wondering if they should’ve pushed Lars even harder, but as Sadie starts to agree with him, she realizes that no, they shouldn’t, because it’s not up to them to make Lars happy. They can try, and they should, but friends aren’t failures if their friends can’t take steps for themselves. It’s a hard lesson to learn, but it’s one last reminder that Steven shouldn’t put the world on his shoulders before Steven goes and puts the world on his shoulders.

I call this a Sadie Episode because she’s the one that grows in it. Lars is in his rut of inaction, just as Steven is in his rut of misplaced responsibility, but Sadie gains the confidence boost of new friends and a new perspective into her relationship with a guy who came this close to admitting that he loved her to Steven. Lars is about to fail her through his cowardice in the same way Steven is about to fail Connie through his hubris, and like Connie, Sadie will use the opportunity to stand up for herself. And let’s not forget that this is the episode where Sadie Killer meets the Suspects.

The cliffhanger from Doug Out goes unacknowledged until the very end of The Good Lars, especially because Sour Cream seems unfazed by Onion’s disappearance for now; perhaps some viewers watched the episode waiting for the other shoe to drop, and I imagine such a lens colored the whole story in a way it didn’t for me. I wasn’t surprised by the reappearance of the two Gem silhouettes, but it remains a spine-chilling way to end such a human-centric tale. And even this provides us with hope, allowing us to imagine that Lars didn’t bail after all and was simply kidnapped by aliens. Stuck Together soon snatches that hope away, which is par for the course for Lars’s arc, but it’s a powerful episode that can make a character’s kidnapping seem like a good thing.

I understand the irony of me saying that an episode about Lars going nowhere is the episode that finally sees Lars going somewhere, but as Mindful Education (and therapy in general) suggests, acknowledging the problem is the first step towards solving it. Lars is about to become a major player, and Sadie is about to earn a new arc of her own, and I can’t think of a better way to set up both of these threads than The Good Lars.

Future Vision!

Beyond the reveal that he trashed the ube before his capture, Stuck Together generally acts as a direct sequel to The Good Lars.

“Bingo Bongo” was magical from the start, evoking Root Beer Guy’s equally magical “Bingo Bango” from Adventure Time. But seeing Lars own it as a badass space pirate is great shorthand for how much he’s grown.

Steven’s pep talk to Lars about going to the party is echoed in his pep talk to Lapis about returning to Earth in Can’t Go Back. Not only because both speeches are good advice, but because unfortunately neither succeeds to make the listener move past their anxiety by the episode’s end.

A story about Steven trying to help someone hellbent on sabotaging themselves and hurting others? That sounds like a good idea for a movie!

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

As always, I’m a sucker for tone, and The Good Lars gets that feeling of teenage dreams grappling with the nightmare of depression just right, both for the victim and for friends of the victim (some of us got to be both!). It’s not overwrought, and we’re still allowed some joy, but it sucks to be so stuck in your head that you can’t move, and this episode captures that sensation way more succinctly than, say, Hamlet. Am I saying it’s better than Hamlet? Not really. But I heard somewhere that brevity is the soul of wit, and it’s certainly briefer.

Top Twenty-Five

Steven and the Stevens

Hit the Diamond

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

Last One Out of Beach City

The Return

Jailbreak

The Answer

Mindful Education

Sworn to the Sword

Rose’s Scabbard

Earthlings

Mr. Greg

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Beach City Drift

Winter Forecast

Bismuth

Steven’s Dream

When It Rains

The Good Lars

Catch and Release

Chille Tid

Lion 4: Alternate Ending

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Ocean Gem

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Warp Tour

The Test

Future Vision

On the Run

Maximum Capacity

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Keeping It Together

We Need to Talk

Cry for Help

Keystone Motel

Back to the Barn

Steven’s Birthday

It Could’ve Been Great

Message Received

Log Date 7 15 2

Same Old World

The New Lars

Monster Reunion

Alone at Sea

Crack the Whip

Beta

Back to the Moon

Kindergarten Kid

Buddy’s Book

Gem Harvest

Three Gems and a Baby

That Will Be All

The New Crystal Gems

Storm in the Room

Room for Ruby

Doug Out

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Reformed

Rising Tides, Crashing Tides

Onion Friend

Historical Friction

Friend Ship

Nightmare Hospital

Too Far

Barn Mates

Steven Floats

Drop Beat Dad

Too Short to Ride

Restaurant Wars

Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service

Greg the Babysitter

Gem Hunt

Steven vs. Amethyst

Bubbled

Adventures in Light Distortion

Gem Heist

The Zoo

Rocknaldo

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

Super Watermelon Island

Gem Drill

Know Your Fusion

Future Boy Zoltron

Tiger Philanthropist

No Thanks!

     6. Horror Club      5. Fusion Cuisine      4. House Guest      3. Onion Gang      2. Sadie’s Song      1. Island Adventure

#the good lars #steven universe #su #steven universally #review

[illegiblewords]

5 Questions for Writers!

               5 Questions for Writers                                                        

I got tagged by @kunstpause, it looked like fun so figured I’d go for it! THANKS TO KUNST!

Tagging @wouldyouliketoseemymask, @nilim, @azwoodbomb, @peregrineroad, @frostmantle, @autumnslance, @strangefellows, @redbud-tree, @nozomikei​, and @rivenroad​. No obligation to anyone but full permission to steal granted to anyone else who might like to. I’ll literally be delighted if you pick this up spontaneously and blame me as an excuse lmao.

1. Do you have a favorite character to write? Who and why?

2. Do you have a favorite trope to write? Or one you want to write?

3. Share your favorite description you’ve written?

4. Share your favorite dialogue you’ve written?

5. Scene you haven’t written, but want to?

I made long answers so have a cut!

1. Do you have a favorite character to write? Who and why?

It depends heavily on what fandom and where I am mentally, but I’ve figured out I tend to love writing angsty lameass dudes with blonde hair who are prone to doing really silly things despite taking themselves entirely too seriously. Honestly, I have a pretty huge track record at this point. Harvey Dent, Vexen, Dmitri, Lahabrea, probably more besides. Every one of them fits the right balance of lameass to angst. I like seeing them grow and find fulfillment as people and they are very very cute while still having an edge of badassery and cleverness. Also they’re funny.

Lahabrea is my favorite at the moment, and him reaching that position is an accomplishment considering how stiff the competition is in FFXIV. Loser tricked his way to the top while I was busy laughing at him.

2. Do you have a favorite trope to write? Or one you want to write?

I really, really, really love redemption arcs and people recovering from fucked up experiences. Latter case especially I love seeing characters in those situations successfully connect to the people and world around them, especially if they get to grow together with a partner. I also LOVE “hero saves the villain and villain takes it to heart”.

(You may be sensing a theme here haha.)

There are a few reason these concepts resonate with me, the first being I think they’re really hopeful, inspiring, and something I always wanted to see growing up but rarely did.

People fuck up in life. People get hurt in horrible ways that bring out the worst in them. Sometimes when that happens they dig themselves deeper and deeper into ugliness. The more a person’s bad side comes out, the more hopeless it can feel. And for mental illness especially I’ve found this can be a major issue.

Everyone makes mistakes and everyone has flaws, but I think there’s something really significant in seeing someone who has hit rock bottom, who can no longer imagine a way out, get offered a hand for support and take it. While recovery and redemption (not synonymous of course) ultimately need to be carried by the individual struggling, I really can’t understate how important it is to know in those situations that you’re not alone and someone believes in you.

I think a big part of why this theme is important to me is because mental illness, both genetic and due to trauma, is something unbelievably difficult and painful not only for the sufferer but those around them. The most mentally ill characters in fiction tend to be villains, and are disproportionately more likely to be suffering severe trauma. It frustrated me since I was pretty young to see over and over again cases where a mess could have been avoided if there was any support system in place.

Seeing compassion and connection given that kind of power means a lot to me, as does recognizing that villains are people before they are villains. It’s also very reassuring in the sense of “If this person fucked up that badly but still tried to better themself, I can too. And odds are I’m also worthy of love and compassion, even when my issues make things harder for others. I just have to keep working to improve.”

3. Share your favorite description you’ve written?

Eff.

Straight up I think I’ve written too much to have just one favorite description. It’s been a lot of years and I have hundreds of fics and I’m lame. So I’m going to put a few of my favs.

Anytime there’s a gap in block quotes it’s a different section within the same fic.

22 - A Batman Fanfic

He trembles beneath the weight of their expectations but his smile never fades flashes before cameras microphones under his nose crowds screaming questions bleeding together he answers like clockwork the District Attorney who must bring justice to us all paying tribute to false idols with golden hair and silver tongues we the people bow down in worship to this guardian of the law with words and deeds I believe in Harvey Dent so he swears in hallowed halls to bring prosperity to smite the wicked to damn the criminal with authority invested in him by Gotham’s dutiful children and himself.

***

On the precipice of victory we stand united our voice raised like a torch like a spear like a golden arrow against the beast of Lerna we are gods and monsters we are so much more than good and evil we are order in the court cauterizing corruption our head held high and mighty manifest in Harvey of the doubletalk Harvey who writes himself into the fabric of Gotham’s history Harvey who will not bend before the Roman we command you the unworthy we condemn you the unrighteous we will not be merciful and you will fall before our eyes.

***

I am Dionysus divided at the altar of Tyche O Fortuna O Fortuna give me guidance in the light of the moon you dance sacred silver dollar I see and obey the wax and wane your whim Wheel of Fortune the card I am dealt your servant your slave venerated puppet of flesh blessed is your wisdom bestowed upon I am your disciple wine-mad twisted chanting your word becomes law holy splendor against gavels desecrating your name defiant in denial extend your will through me and we shall strike the innocent enlighten the ignorant or spare them all for now.

Doppelganger - A Spider-Man Fanfic

She asks him to tell the story of himself, and like Scheherazade he begins anew each day.

As with many other things, this comparison is imperfect. The Ravencroft Institute is hardly a palace and neither of them could pass for royalty. She sits in a chair across from him over a carpet the color of sawdust. Her walls are lined with insects pinned on display. Not many butterflies, quite a few beetles. On a bookshelf Dmitri sees The Metamorphosis nestled between non-fiction texts more relevant to her profession. He thinks maybe it's an inside joke she has with herself, but doesn't say so.

He's received an invitation to call her Ashley instead of Dr. Kafka and doesn't know whether to accept. It might be to make him more comfortable. It might be something else. In her late fifties Kafka is built from delicate features, and he suspects the lines around her eyes mean they crinkle when she smiles. Short black hair, beige suit, only jewelry a pair of diamond stud earrings. Dmitri thinks she looks like a mother, but not his.

Her weight sinks into leather, darker than the floor. The couch he rests on matches. He finds himself leaning forward with one elbow propped on his thigh, the other locked in a cast suspended by his neck. There is something reassuringly empty in the gray fabric of his uniform, cheap and utilitarian and harmless. Dmitri’s wrists are thin, but then he's lost a lot of weight recently. He probably wouldn't be able to run as fast as he used to, but then circumstances would be the same anywhere he went so that really doesn't matter. His espionage days are over. His free arm is shedding in flakes but at least his skin is dry. Clean.

Dmitri no longer looks like anyone, unrecognizable to himself. A face without much in the way of edges, short nose. Weak chin. Mismatched eyes that shift between green and blue and brown and every other natural hue as moments pass into minutes pass into hours. Dark blotches interrupt his forehead and chin. They will peel in new patterns across a span of days. For the most part though, he is pale enough to trace veins where his body seems on the brink of spilling out.

It's been a while since he shaved his head and the hair that grows back is almost foreign. An unruly mess of black, blond, brunet, and red—strands as unlike in texture as anything else. The mask that made him Chameleon was white plastic embedded with hardware. Left deformed after trying to resemble others in flesh too many times, it allowed him to duplicate any face, any body he could remember. More than holograms, the most complete sensory illusions technology could perform.

Without it, Dmitri feels stripped.

When Kafka looks at him she’s receiving constant signals and missing none of them. The moments he needs to turn away, flat monosyllabic turns of phrase he chooses or resorts to or blankly accepts as his own. It doesn’t have to be this way. It isn’t comfortable and he doesn’t even trust it’s not calculated. But she’s going to notice no matter what he does at this point, and lying about it doesn’t do anyone much good. They both know why he’s here.

***

“We were poor. We worked hard to keep ourselves fed and clothed and less than an embarrassment. I probably could have worked harder. Mother,” he begins before stumbling over himself.

The story he’s telling isn’t hers. Whatever else she was, Sonya Smerdyakov wasn’t Mrs. Bates. He remembers her voice as the beginning of an echo, forever following someone else’s lead.

And so he followed her.

She was bright like a light going out. She was gentle without being kind. Her fingers were short and delicate and she touched him as little as possible. He found her attention in the way she avoided his name.

***

In the privacy of his room, Dmitri began talking to himself.

Celebrities. Teachers. Children. The flat, steady rhythm of his father’s voice. The words and intonations favored by mother. Sergei’s laugh. He lost himself in a fantasy of conversations, strode through space to mimic confidence he didn’t feel, flashed teeth in front of his mirror like other people.

Once, Dmitri raised his voice. And when his older brother came, eyebrows knitting in confusion, he found himself full of stammered explanations, hands fumbling at his elbows, stumbling over his tongue to make sense of it.

Just making stories for himself. A game with no ending. That was all.

***

He would have died in that town under the eyes of speechless parents. Dmitri remembers the confusion that took his peers when he found a job for people who spoke for themselves. They thought he might be growing up.

He could lie. And when he began he understood it would always be a game with no ending.

Dmitri lost himself in a fantasy of conversations with real people and a voice that didn’t belong to him.

They asked a stranger to sign their yearbooks without even realizing it.

And then he was eighteen, and he left to continue elsewhere.

He didn’t announce his departure.

From Umbra - A Final Fantasy XIV Fanfic

It was probably a dream.

Lukewarm water crept down his throat, nearly making him choke. A skin pressed to his lips, insistent. He coughed, and for the first time there was moisture enough for resistance.

The face that obscured his vision was shrouded in white cloth. Cenric found he couldn’t focus on it. Mismatched eyes, one light and the other dark. Impossible to say if blindness caused the inconsistency.

A string of shells dangled from the figure’s neck, rattling gently. The skin pulled back for a moment. Careful. Patient.

It returned only once he'd grown quiet. Cenric drank for as long as he could. Impossibly, a great deal remained by the time he relinquished his hold.

There wasn't enough of him present to say thank you. Cenric barely registered being dragged, being carried onto a cart. Awareness was altogether gone by the time they started to move.

***

…to the blessed traders who enrich our lives we’re bound to pay with our lives in turn aether born fire-walker your will sees us to rest we entrust ourselves to your sight forged of oschon for peace and prosperity and an ending you do not weep for father azeyma lives in the earth with you her fan brings no breeze the air is hot and thick and breathless your domain a silent place that does not stir have you forgotten the sound of your own voice have you known what it is to live and fail have you been alone do you know what it is to die how can a god pass judgment without being judged nald’thal lord of departures of flame and sand whose coin purse overflows who knows not what it means to starve what it means to spoil the legacy of one who loved you nald’thal who holds shells and souls and precious stones as if their worth were equal nald’thal who cannot know mercy without knowing pain who are you to weigh mortal affairs?

***

In darkness he unwinds the black bandana, steps first from his slops and then his kurta. Yuyudana has provided robes, which rest neatly on a small rock nearby. It crosses Cenric’s mind that the bones of his knees, his hips, his wrists, even his face have all started to protrude strangely. He looks less hyuran than before, maybe less than he ever has. Closer to something priests would exorcise than anyone deserving aid.

He wonders if this idea has occurred to them.

The water, when he advances, is cold. Goosebumps raise across his skin as slowly, gingerly, he wades in to his waist.

Cenric ducks under.

His hair is a long and tangled wreck. Being wet only disguises this slightly. It drifts past his neck, comes to float near the surface. Cenric holds himself in silence, eyes open, watching the silver scatter of light over stones and plants and fish. He remains for as long as he can bear.

His vision stings afterward. Gasping, he can’t tell if the cause is exposure or something else. For a time he simply waits, breathing hard through his nose, hunched so that his lips are partially submerged.

He thinks of nothing, pretends that this time instead of no future he has no past.

Only one moon remains. Maybe the sky aches for losing Dalamud, but better that than the blow which scarred Eorzea.

Stalemate - A Final Fantasy XIV Fanfic

He is presented with impressions of a horse, gaunt and fetid and decayed. Spreading ruin wheresoever it goes. Occasionally it sloughs off portions of its own flesh, which collect flies and blacken any land that surrounds. On its back rests a world, and alongside it does the herd struggle under their own burdens. But even beasts of such endurance have limits. Theirs are reached. When the rotten steed lags, its companions cannot afford to falter. Cannot turn. Without its ability to bear loads, this aberration has no place. Falling is inevitable.

Yet a heart still beats and lungs yet swell.

The Ascian shivers in his grasp, but does not attempt escape.

Here, something festers. Something bleeds. An old wound exacerbated over time.

Fevered, coated in a film of self-disgust, the core of Lahabrea convulses.

 Don’t…

 Don’t leave me like this…

***

Teeth and tongue. Lingering, wet, disembodied. Another finds his hip. Another his thigh, slipping beneath what clothes remain.

And another.

And another.

Warm, human, seeking. The Warrior tightens his hold, uses the moan crawling from his own chest as incentive. Barred by naught but fabric, driving close as he can manage. Lahabrea makes a strangled sound, his gasp crushed empty. A new mouth finds the dark knight’s ear in response.

These are parts of him no one dares touch, no one dares acknowledge. Slick now, attended with something like reverence. Supplication.

He resolves to fuck the Ascian senseless for this, presses his intent deep into Lahabrea’s aether. He is going to steal all his fancy words away. Make him squirm.

“I… I…” Tight, airless, like a plucked string. The Warrior feels Lahabrea’s voice reverberate against the roof of his mouth.

The feeling is difficult to describe. Cracked ice. A fraying rope. Such is Lahabrea's response, fumbling and disoriented as it is.

The Warrior lets go.

4. Share your favorite dialogue you’ve written?

Just imagine me weeping over here lmao. Same deal as before, I’VE DONE TOO MUCH SHIT.

Spare Change - A Batman Fanfic

"Stop," he gasps, "I wouldn’t—"

"You would Harvey. You did. It’s what makes you such a damn good instrument. You had to test yourself, prove that you’re not a real person.” He can feel fingers grinding against bone. His knees bend. Harvey kneels, shuddering, gazing up into the destruction of his own visage. Two-Face meets his eyes, blue on blue. “People are weak. People are ruled by what they want and don’t want. You’re capable of anything if the wind blows just right. You can’t even stop yourself.”

"I wouldn’t," he repeats, numbly.

"Did you," demands Two-Face, forcing him down further, "or did you not flip for their lives, Harvey Dent?"

"We…We aren’t the same people anymore."

"Of COURSE we’re the same people!" Another shove and he’s on the ground, Two-Face sitting on his chest, teeth bared, coin clenched tight between them. "Do you really think you can close your eyes and pretend you aren’t capable of these things? They’re alive," and there is something hideous in his expression, something certain, "because they were lucky. No other reason.”

"The coin is gone! Even if I wanted to listen to it—I can’t!”

"If you’re so sure," says Two-Face, "then how about you improvise?”

And with one motion the silver dollar is under his tongue, forced back so hard he feels himself gag and begin to choke before his eyes open.

The Inquisitor’s Letters - A Dragon Age: Inquisition Fanfic

To His Worship Inquisitor Mahanon Lavellan of Skyhold, My name is Isell from Amaranthine and I’m seven. My mum is helping but says I can send you all by myself. Thank you for fixing the hole in the sky and also the one by the dead man’s house. There were demons but they’re mostly gone now and people are going outside now. Da says Amaranthine has been through too much and can survive anything and he says you’re an elf like us and the Hero of Ferelden was an elf too. He says people used to think elves can’t be heroes but now they don’t. Have you met the Hero of Ferelden? Also I heard that even though you’re Dalish Andraste helped you in the Fade and that humans let you be in the Chantry because anyone Andraste likes must be a really good person. What’s Andraste like? The Chant says a lot but it’s different meeting someone I think. Also I think I saw you a little before but Mum wasn’t sure because you had a helmet on and we were far away and there were a lot of people but I bet it was you. Da wasn’t sure I should write because he says the Dalish don’t like city elves like we are but I think you must be nice and Mum agrees with me. I’ve been playing demon hunters with my brother Arrion (he’s just five still) and Da said templars are who fights demons usually and elves can’t be templars. People thought elves couldn’t be heroes and inquisitors though and we are so I bet I could too. Is it hard fighting demons? Da says they’re real scary but I’m not scared. Thank you for helping us and everyone and I hope you kill lots of demons. Sincerely, Isell U’venlan

From Umbra - A Final Fantasy XIV Fanfic

Cenric sits on the floor, draped in a white cotton tunic. It might have been snug on a Roegadyn but anyone else would find ample room. Behind him, Memesu stands on a cot holding shears. Gold earrings dangle on either side of her face.

“I fought at Carteneau, you know,” she mentions casually. There is a soft hsssssshhhh. Click.

Hair hits the floor. Coils.

He starts to shake his head, aborts the gesture partway through. Stills. “…you saw Bahamut?”

Memesu snorts. “I’m sure everyone this side of Hydaelyn saw Bahamut.” Click.

“That’s probably true,” he concedes. The dragon is what everyone knows, everyone remembers. He can't imagine the proximity. “What about the Warriors of Light?”

“Pff.” Gentle tugging at his scalp. Cenric does not open his eyes but leans into the motion. “I wasn’t of rank to see their like. Not that I’d remember. Stop moving.” Click.

Cenric hesitates.

“What do you remember, then?”

For a time, the only sound comes from blades and a thousand strands cut short. This lasts for several minutes. Cenric resigns himself to secrets.

Then, “I used to think I was special too. As a twin. My sister was Memeni. We studied together.”

 Was.

The exhale hits him slowly, quietly.

“She died?”

He can feel the shrug in her hip against his shoulder.

“It was Carteneau,” says Memesu. “Of course she died.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Why?” Click. “It had nothing too do with you. If you keep trying to claim responsibility for every misfortune you find, you’re going to get self-important.”

Cenric only grunts, quiet and non-committal.

 Click.

 Click.

 Click.

“Carteneu was so much worse than people remember. Only four years later and already we hurry to dispose of details.” There is a hard undercurrent to Memesu’s voice, but what contact she makes remains light. Careful. “I remember the arcanist from Limsa who didn’t dodge a magitek canon in time. Miqo’te. Spells come faster in that discipline, so there’s less stress on distance than thaumaturgy. Girl got careless.” Click. “The mess smelled like rotten eggs and charcoal. Her face was… melted.” Click. “I try not to look in those situations. They only make casting harder. But she was so close.”

Cenric doesn’t move. Doesn’t say a word.

Memesu continues. “One of our own gladiators, an Ala Mhigan, took to mutilating any pureblooded Garleans he could catch. The man had a string of eyes hanging around his neck. I’m pretty sure one enemy officer wet himself before he started to beg. Not that it particularly mattered.”

 Click.

“Memeni… didn’t anticipate what she was getting herself into. She saw magic as a way of being useful to craftsmen. My focus has always been theoretical. Right side.” Startled, Cenric lets her guide his jaw to get a better view of his profile. Click. Click. “Meni used to think I was a priss. She preferred to develop magitek kettles alongside alchemists. See if she could find a way to capture light like the Mhachi did. She still enjoyed fishing when she could, even though it smelled awful. Never outgrew the braids she wore growing up. ” Memesu sighs. “…just understand she died afraid, in pain, and with things left undone. My sister didn’t even resemble herself at the end.”

Cenric is very still. Thinks carefully.

“…I wish it could have gone differently,” he says at last.

Memesu’s mouth slides up in a small, crooked smile. She tousles the neat, ear-length hair before her. “So do I.”

Eclipse - A Final Fantasy XIV Fanfic

It ends at Elidibus’ untimely arrival.

“Lord Zodiark,” he says, so smoothly that were he not searching for it that the anger would be undetectable, “appreciates your attentions.”  His gaze does not waver from Lahabrea as he speaks. “But there is work to be done and I’m afraid there are words I would have with your Speaker.”

They disperse.

Nabriales, careful and curious, folds himself out of sight beyond the chamber then makes his way back to its edge.

Lahabrea, farthest from the exit, attempts to steal some small dignity. Turns to face Elidibus.

The Emissary makes him wait. Expressionless red masks matched by those who wear them.

Then, with more speed and force than typical for his demeanor, the Emissary closes distance to trap his colleague against the wall.

“It was my error,” hisses Elidibus, leaning in, “to have stayed silent upon rescuing you. A mistake I will remedy now, so we can be on no uncertain terms.”

Lahabrea lowers his eyes. Nabriales notes that despite the dread they all share of such reprimands, the man does not brace.

“You know as well as I that these words offer less succor to our Lord than action,” continues Elidibus, his fury quiet and no less sharp for that, “just as we both know your thoughtless action is the cause of repeated missteps these past centuries. Make no mistake—for all the strides you’ve made, your fixation and your impatience have cost the rest of us considerable time.”

Silence.

“Do you truly think this is your best service to Him?” asks Elidibus. “To us? Compromising your ability to fill the hours? Even Emet-Selch agrees these displays are disgraceful. You have ever borne them poorly, but being a 'paragon among paragons' naturally you continue ignoring your own better judgment with ours to continue this exercise in futility. Idiot.”

A twitch of the head. Almost a flinch.

It is one of few moments Nabriales has seen the Emissary express his anger so openly. Even after the Thirteenth fell to Igeyorhm’s error, Elidibus allowed the Angel of Truth to lead and voiced his own reproach with a more typical icy demeanor. Scathing though it was.

“I can be of use,” says Lahabrea softly. “Only three of us remain, and I—“

“You,” Elidibus snaps, “cannot follow the most simple instructions for the good of us all. Not for Him, not for Amaurot, not even for yourself. Your pride has made you not simply an embarrassment but a liability.”

Neither man speaks for several moments after that.

And then, at length, Elidibus exhales.

Says the Speaker’s name.

Receives his attention.

“What would you have me do?” the Emissary asks. His tone now is almost weary. “Clearly it would be unreasonable to trust you’d simply listen. Must I mind you like a child?” This is what breaks Lahabrea’s composure.

Knowing the man’s temper, Nabriales had expected him to lash out. Even on the back foot their orator is perfectly capable of defending himself from insults.

Instead, he embraces Elidibus fiercely—face just within the bounds of his pauldrons. Jaw locked shut firmly enough to hurt. Expression downcast.

Elidibus remains perfectly still at first. In the absence of conversation it is possible to hear the rush of Lahabrea’s breathing. Only through the nose, withheld briefly between each inhale as if that offers some means to steady himself.

As if that would make it better.

Tentatively, Elidibus holds him back. Lahabrea's fingers contract, and though he remains upright when his knees begin to give it is the Emissary who helps him kneel.

“Easy,” he murmurs, and Lahabrea removes one hand to run it reflexively over his face—coming against the mask.

Nabriales finds himself staring, searching. A puzzle with missing pieces whose image he may yet divine

“It was not,” says Lahabrea roughly, “my intention to…”

Elidibus reaches beneath the other man’s cowl, finds the hair and skin beneath. Draws him in once more.

Naught that would be shared with or among the Sundered. Nothing so personal as that.

Nabriales has worn his own share of flesh. Bedded lovers, adopted companions and families of vessels to fulfill a purpose. Passable enough, perhaps, but never for him. Not in truth.

It’s as if he looks upon two strangers.

Parched - A Final Fantasy XIV Fanfic

The door closes behind them. Lahabrea, projecting his preferred likeness over the host, waits on a couch within.

It’s admittedly a surreal sight. Ishgardian finery with its gilded edges, its elaborate wallpapers and marble floors. A collection of creams and blues and greens, fine furniture with velvet seat cushions. All ostentatious in the extreme… and then Lahabrea. Masked and cowled. Pouring three glasses of La Noscean arrack.

Elidibus freezes, and though none of them can see his eyes the confusion is clear enough.

“What is this?”

“Your turn,” says Emet-Selch, lightly but less flippant than he might have been.

Lahabrea proffers a cup from where he sits.

Elidibus neither moves nor speaks.

Emet-Selch approaches. Takes the drink. Presses it carefully into the other man’s hand.

“Don’t think,” he says smoothly,” that I won’t let you drop it.”

Mercifully, Elidibus has a good grip.

“Sit,” says Lahabrea, gesturing with his own glass to the sofa across from him.

Elidibus sits.

Emet-Selch sits.

Takes his own glass, perhaps a bit pointedly.

Elidibus’ mouth is pressed tight. It opens briefly, as if to speak. Shuts again.

“Explain,” the Emissary manages eventually.

Lahabrea meets his co-conspirator’s eye. Downs his arrack in a single attempt.

It is a long attempt.

It lasts several moments.

The other Ascians watch.

“Elidibus,” says Emet-Selch as Lahabrea endeavors to catch his breath in the aftermath, “Lahabrea and I are concerned that you may be experiencing some difficulties in recent years.”

“I’m fine,” replies Elidibus coldly. Holding his drink. “Why did you think this necessary?”

“Because—“ wheezes Lahabrea.

“Because you’re practically a mammet,” says Emet-Selch, picking up Lahabrea’s glass. Moving it just out of reach. “Truly. It’s been what, two hundred years? Three? Neither of us can remember the last time you so much as spoke of matters unrelated to the Rejoining.”

Lahabrea reaches. Elidibus pours his arrack into the other man’s glass before nudging it back toward him.

Elidibus makes eye contact with Emet-Selch.

“I remain focused,” he says evenly. “Nothing more.”

Emet-Selch gestures to the bottle.

Elidibus sighs.

Refills his own glass.

“There are matters I must attend myself. As is the case with each of you.”

“Undoubtedly,” replies Lahabrea more evenly. “But with few exceptions, you haven’t done so.”

A hard stare from behind the mask.

“What would you have me do? I can’t very well take time off.”

Emet-Selch sips.

“A negligible amount of time,” he says, “taken sparingly, may be forgivable.”

5. Scene you haven’t written, but want to?

Lmao see this is a plus side/minus side deal. Minus side, it’s being asked just before I embark on a MASSIVE ASS FANFIC. And I basically am excited for all of it. Plus side, there are things I refuse to spoil.

So... putting it vaguely, in no particular order:

- Lahabrea and Hydaelyn meet a second time after Praetorium.

- Moonfire Faire

- Thancred

- Conversations over mulled wine

- Silvertear Lake

Some of these are sex scenes. Most aren’t. But I am very hyped.

[parfaitwaffles]

Mid-Season Cures: Top Ranking

A few weeks ago, the newest mid season Cure, Cure Cosmo has debuted. And since Star Twinkle has been the 10th season to have a mid season Cure, I started to think about which mid season Cures are my most favorites.

Note: This ranking only includes Cures that appeared in the 20-ish episodes (aka joined the team around that time). Otherwise, it’d be hard (for me at least) to determine who exactly is the mid season Cure for certain seasons.

This ranking is based on personal opinion! You don’t have to agree with it, nor do you have to like it. It was made just for fun and not to serve the purpose to hate on certain characters!

#1 Cure Passion

It might sound a little funny, but yes, the very first official mid season Cure is also my most favorite one! Despite joining the fandom in 2013, Fresh Pretty Cure! was the first season I watched and totally fell in love with. There’s not a single thing I dislike about the season and I love ever character of the show. 

But that is not the reason why Passion is my most favorite mid season Cure. Among all Cures that joined late, Passion/Eas just simply had the best redemption arc in my opinion! She was a badass character as Eas and suffered through her arc, trying to prove to Moebius that’s she is a loyal servant, even if it meant to risk her own life. And her struggle didn’t end after she became Cure Passion. She kept on doubting herself, she felt like she was all alone until she realized and accepted that Love and the others wanted her to be with her.

Additionally, Setsuna is simply badass, I can’t help but loving her.

#2 Cure Scarlet

To be honest, when Go! Pri first aired, I didn’t like it at all, it was among my least favorite seasons, and thus I didn’t think highly of Cure Scarlet. By today, however, I have totally fallen in love with the season and appreciate the plot, the setting, the characters, the everything. In my personal ranking, Go! Pri might not be my most favorite season but I still love it very much. 

Originally, I thought Scarlet might be a rip off of Passion. But I learned and realized that despite them both being redemption Cures, they are quite different. Setsuna might have had the more impacting arc, but that didn’t mean that Towa’s was bad!! In fact, I teared up quite often during her arc as well and Twilight is a terribly awesome character! (I kinda even like Twilight more than Towa tbh).

#3 Cure Fortune

A lot people dislike HaCha, so I wonder how many of you would be surprised to see Fortune to be my 3rd most favorite mid season Cure. But yes, she is! Fortune has a lot badass-ness to give. Like... all other Cures were somehow chosen by Blue (he threw the crystals at them) while Iona took the PreChanMirror of her sister to avange her. She was probably one of the most determined Cures we have ever met. She literally went “God, who? I will rescue my sister no matter what!”. I agree that she was a little strict and stubborn towards Hime, but let’s be honest, she had all reason to!

Cure Fortune is just cute and amazing, I totally love her!

#4 Cure Sunshine

//coughs// I wanna talk with you Toei, about how you handled Itsuki. Because?? She (Cure Sunshine) debuted as a badass Cure who does shields but can kick ass because she’s awesome and all! But after a while, all she does is shielding her friends? She can kick ass, so let her kick ass, please! 

Ehem... yes, I also really love Cure Sunshine. Tho before I watched Heartcatch Pretty Cure!, I thought Itsuki was boring... oh how wrong I was, right? Itsuki has probably one of the best transformations of all. It shows that you can be cute and badass at the same time. I’ve seen someone talking bad about her transformation, but tbh?? It’s amazing, give me more like that!

#5 Cure Beat

I have once started watching Suite Pretty Cure♪ but dropped it (because life got crazy). I will watch it completely one day though! And for favorite Cure... of Suite I love Cure Muse the most, but as I limited the mid season ranking to Cures that appeared in the 20ish episodes, I have to go with Beat. And I really do like Beat!! Like Passion, Beat was once a villain of the season, but even though they have a similar background, the story was completely different and I think Toei chose a good plot for Beat! I doubt that a redemption arc like Eas’ had fit with her tbh. 

Now, I could never take Siren as serious as Eas but... I suppose we never should. I guess she was always supposed to be a funny character that the audience loves to see. And tbh that’s what I like about Siren/Ellen/Beat. How random and funny she was at times, but then could also be determined and protective again. 

Also, guitars. Yes please. We need more Guitar Cures. We’ve only had 3 so far! (4 if you count Gelato, but she didn’t use one to attack)

#6 Cure Parfait

Tbh, I prefer Kirarin over Parfait and Ciel, but there we go; Cure Parfait is my favorite Cure from her season because she’s so different from everyone else. Her transformation is, imo, the most beautiful one and her attack... is really weird, but not as weird as creating a darn cake and then throw it at the enemy (seriously Toei, that attack is lame, what were you thinking xD). I can’t exactly say what I liked about Cure Parfait, I might like her the most because she and Pikario (best boy!!) had the best development and best arc of the whole season and thus her debut was so emotional, to me at least. Idk, but here we are. She can’t even make it to my top 5 favorite mid season Cures... xD

#7 Cure Amour & Cure MaCherie

I love Cure MaCherie and am neutral about Cure Amour, and as mid season Cures I’m pretty much “meh” about them because they simply took too much spotlight from the other three Cures. In the end,... usually a mid season Cure joins when the Cures can’t take a certain challenge anymore and need support. Then the candidate to become a Cure, becomes determinded and creates a miracle by becoming another Pretty Cure (that is the usual way. I prefer more creative ways, like Towa and Setsuna’s tbh). Emiru and Ruru’s debut was ... Hana was sick and Homare and Saaya were ignored. That’s why they had to transform... right?? In other words, it was lame.

At least the transformation and attacks were nice! They also felt like they are part of the team, which I missed in KiraKira, where Ciel always only spoke with Ichika and that’s it...

#8 Cure Felice

I still have to watch Mahou Tsukai, so my opinion of her could still change! But for now, I’m very neutral towards Cure Felice tbh, she is cute and I love her design but... that’s just it? Her transformation is beautiful, but just so looooooong... same with her attack, way too long and also a bit boring. I get she is the Cure of nature, but did you have to show the flowers blooming from step to step @ toei???

Also I never understood why we need a flower Cure in a season based on magic. I know she is Mother RaPaPa but... eh... yes. 

#9 Cure Ace

One word: meh. Too bossy, and her entrance was too random. She never appeared before. It’s like Toei forgot about her until episode 23.

#10 Cure Cosmo

hmmm please note that this opinion of Cure Cosmo can still change as Star Twinkle Pretty Cure is still airing! However, as for now, I’m really no fan of her. I really like Yuni/Blue Cat though, as she is a badass character who likes to be a lone wolf! Cure Cosmo, however, just seems a little useless at the moment. Of course this is to blame on Toei but ,... well everything that happens is always to blame on Toei, so that’s even.

To me, her debut episodes, her transformation and even her attack were medicore and can’t be compared to other mid season Cures. Even Cure Ace had a flashier transformation (even though her fairy partner is annoying me). And even Ace’s attack was impacting, while Rainbow Splash is just good for visuals but except for that, it’s really lame. Up until now, the only (!!!) thing I can love Cosmo for is all the 80s aesthetic (but then again, Toei is trying WAYYYY to hard it that. It’s so much that it hurts, I’m sorry.) 

I hope Toei steps up the game with Cosmo and maybe I’ll like her more by the end of the season. But now she’s just... kinda meh to me.

#precure #pretty cure #cure passion #cure sunshine #cure beat #cure fortune #cure scarlet #cure felice #cure amour #cure macherie #cure parfait #cure cosmo #cure ace

[jj-ktae]

Millennials - Part 4 -

Title: Millennials Genre: Fluff, romance Pairing: Kim Yugyeom x You Summary: Life is made of stages and each of them is a hard push on the back, forcing you to forge ahead. You’re facing your biggest crisis, and then there’s him, who lives from day to day. Of course he does, he is just a kid. Words: 4749 Warning: Small age difference. Yugyeom x Noona Reader.

Check my masterlist for previous chapters!

Part IV

You don’t know how to deal with yourself. Most of the time, you know how to handle sticky situations, stress, or even yelling customers. So far you did great, dodging the bullets sent your way with little to no difficulty.


But that dress is too tight for a simple drink downtown.

“What, you don’t like it?” Naya enters your living-room with more clothes and toss them on the couch. “I think it suits you.”

You puff, hair flying away from your frustrated face. You’re not sure you can walk around wearing that. “Aren’t we overdoing it? It’s just-”

“It’s a date. You’re supposed to make yourself pretty for a date.” Your friend’s voice makes you groan louder, hands on your hips in front of the mirror.

It’s odd to consider this whole thing a date. Naya can’t stop nagging you about how pretty you have to be and how you should be kind and receptive to Yugyeom. She already teased the shit out of you for accepting, now she is going on and on about how you should apply makeup or how short your dress has to be.

You don’t want to wear makeup and you certainly don’t want to wear a tight dress.

She doesn’t seem to get the whole concept of being natural so you play along, not in the mood to crush her hopes and tell her you won’t be wearing anything too fancy as it doesn’t reflect your personality. She would insist, though, because ‘you can’t go wearing those lame jeans and dirty sneakers. Level up for that kid!’

What the hell does she mean by ‘level up’? Yugyeom is a boy who doesn’t seem to be into fancy and shiny stuff, which shouldn’t even matter because you don’t plan on seducing him. It’s a date for everyone else but you, even though your mind screams at you to just let it go for one evening and enjoy. You sigh loudly, pulling on the fabric to make it longer.

“I don’t think he expects me to be this…glamourous.” You try one last time, checking the clock on your living-room’s wall. “Also, I have to go soon.”

Naya clicks her tongue, finally giving up and aiming for a casual outfit. “This.” She shakes another piece of clothing, this time longer and thicker. “Is that fine with you, boring girl?”

You eye the deep blue clothes, tilting your head. Finally, some normal outfit.

You still don’t know why you agreed. You want to find an explanation to such a weird behaviour but you know there’s nothing more to say.

Against every attempt to lie at your stubborn self, you conclude that you agreed because it didn’t sound like a bad idea. There’s no reason to reject him, after all. You tell yourself that you hate him and everything he represents, but that doesn’t mean you have to crush him and his candid hopes.

Maybe it’s because he gives you attention. Maybe your conflicted feelings come from both his bubbly behaviour which you despise and his caring side which stirs your interest unwillingly.

You can’t deny your behaviour changed.

It makes you go back on full cold mood sometimes, when you notice your own body warming up to his presence. It’s a mere need for validation you think, it’s nothing romantic so you refuse to call this whole thing a date.

The scariest part lies in the fear of him being disappointed by your insignificant existence.

Yugyeom texted you two days ago, asking if you were free tonight. He had a few days off because of important exams and explained they would end today. You accepted, trying your best not to chuckle at how clumsily he writes all his messages.

This morning he sent you a very intimidating “I can’t wait for tonight, noona.” Which turned you muted and resulted in leaving him on read.

Naya’s voice echoes in the room and it feels like a huge bell destroying your eardrum.

“I’m coming!”

--

Yugyeom doesn’t usually panic. He had dates with pretty and funny girls in the past, but never was he so stressed about a mere evening with you.

He hates himself for being so shy around you, his hopeless love crushing every attempt at being somewhat normal. Yugyeom is not normal in front of you and it scares him how easily you would end him with a simple remark. He then does his best to make that date perfect despite his poor competences.

Yugyeom goes for what he thinks is the easy route and asks for advises.

But as he stands in front of his friends, he starts questioning his life choices.

Bambam introduces the situation like he is a dumb guy, a fool who can’t be saved. “Kim Yugyeom, 21, asked his crush out and she said yes. The date is tonight but look at him,” His thin arms shake around him, like he is about to make him disappear. “he won’t make it without us.”

Yugyeom shakes his head, choosing to ignore instead of beating his best friend up. “No one asked you.” He sits the opposite direction so he can face his two other friends.

Maybe Jackson and Jinyoung aren’t any better.

Jinyoung doesn’t know how to stop being a bastard, while Jackson offers way too much to anyone who’s willing to even smile at him.

“Why so anxious? She said yes, right?” Said Jinyoung starts, arms crossed over his chest like he owns the whole building. “Be natural.”

Jackson scoffs, getting up and everyone knows he is going to be noisy from the way his mouth opens. “Let’s prepare you a little bit. Jinyoung, don’t tell him to be natural when your last crush ran out of your store, crying.”

Bambam chuckles, now twirling around the trio while whistling.

Jinyoung hums, unimpressed. “Says the guy who gave all his savings to a girl who told him she needed it for her mother’s hospital bill. Yeah Jackson, let’s all follow your disgusting and stupid gullibility.”

Jackson gasps, pointing an angry finger at his friend while Yugyeom closes his eyes in frustration. “She told me she loved me!”

Bambam stops to snap his fingers at the pair, his body now against the couch where Yugyeom is close to having a very dangerous nervous breakdown. “Why did you ask these two? Even google would provide better advices.” He whispers, shrugging.

Yugyeom groans, getting up. “Forget it. I thought you’d be of any help but I guess I’ll just suck it up and do as I please.

Both Jinyoung and Jackson stop. “No!”

Yugyeom freezes, bewildered.

“Joke aside, stop freaking out. She agreed so don’t worry about messing things up. Talk about yourself but not too much, show interest but not too much, be a gentleman, laugh at her jokes and don’t make the situation awkward. Do you really need us for that?” Jinyoung sighs, lifting a hand toward Bambam who is busy playing on his phone. “You, get me something to drink.”

Bambam snorts, getting up and whispering about bossy friends.

Jackson nods, face now serious. “Do you have condoms?”

Yugyeom turns red with embarrassment. “What? Why? Can we not talk about sex like you’re my parents?” “Safety first! Get prepared for any outcome.” His friend continues, not the least bothered.

Jinyoung slaps his arms, slightly offended and looking nauseous. “I don’t want to know either and I don’t think walking around carrying a pack of condoms helps in conveying honest feelings, Jackson.”

“Fine. Suit yourself.”

Yugyeom lets Jackson pout while Bambam comes back with a freshly made coffee and a straight-out of the dry-cleaning outfit.

“Here. Black for you. Wear that turtleneck, it’ll make you look older than these weird stripped shits you wear. If I were you I’d show my tattoos but well, suit yourself.” Bambam lets the clothes fall on Yugyeom who is torn between being thankful and smack his friend’s head.

He doesn’t know why he asked for help but somehow, he feels relaxed from all the bullshit he just heard. Yugyeom gathers the tiny bits of courage left in him to get prepared at Bambam’s place and is extra careful when he styles his hair, opting for a laid-back style with enough fashion to make it look like he isn’t a boring guy.

He goes out of the bathroom, anxiously looking at his friends. “I’m ready.”

--

You don’t expect Yugyeom to be waiting in front of the brasserie but he is there, hands deep into his long coat’s pockets and leaning against the wall. He doesn’t see you immediately, too concentrated on whatever is happening across the street to notice your approaching form, small and anxious.

“Am I late?” You startle him, body now as straight as an I.

He lifts his arms in a soft protest, head shaking. “No, no. I came early.” He stops then, finally noticing your obvious effort – and you totally blame Naya for this – at makeup. “You look different, noona.”

He inhales, heart fluttering at the sight of you and if he didn’t know better he would have showered you with compliments already.

But somehow, he knows that won’t work with you.

You can only nod, somewhat conscious of your appearance and cursing your best-friend for making you stand out when you only live to blend in. Yugyeom coughs, obviously awkward yet determined to take the best out of this evening and turns around, aiming for the door.

The place is not as busy as you thought it would be. It looks fancy and simple, like these places they show in documentaries about cool kids enjoying night-life the posh way. You look at the paintings and decoration, a mix of renaissance and modern furniture giving off soft Italian vibes. Yugyeom is two steps ahead of you, eyes scanning the area as he stops to talk to one of the waiter.

“Follow me.” The thin guy walks, hands busy with a bottle and glasses, toward a semi-circular table. “I’ll be right back with the menus.” The seat follows the table’s pattern, circling it with deep green padded velvet and sending off intimate vibes wrapped in golden, tiny lights.

Yugyeom pinches his lips, forcing a smile as he leans to speak. “Is this okay for you?”. It looks awfully romantic but even though he loves it and wouldn’t mind snuggling next to you, he knows you can run away at any moment.

Yugyeom doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.

He had planned this out in his head a million times. He knew what to do and not to do, how to behave so you won’t hate him even more, what to talk about so you won’t feel bored. He doesn’t want it all ruined right from the start.

You look up from the table, meeting an expectant Yugyeom who is already taking a step back to let you sit. “It’s fine. I like it here.” It’s true. You do like this table. It’s not in the middle of the restaurant so no one walks by and it’s quiet without it being suffocating – the soft music definitely helps filling the blanks. Yugyeom smiles when you approve and you force yourself not to shiver when his hand falls on your back to lead you to the seat.

It’s still so unusual of him to be taking the lead. It makes you see him differently, almost ten years older than he is and you don’t want to think about how manly he appears to be, now.

But all your resolve evaporates like steam when he takes his jacket off and sits next to you, revealing a tight turtleneck and black pants.

Was he always so built?

Maybe you were wrong from the beginning. Maybe you started seeing him like a kid from the moment he applied for the job at the grocery store. Maybe it comes from your initial hatred. It made you built an image of him which you refuse to take away.

But as he softly stretches his arms and unconsciously offers his chest, firm and defined, all reasoning goes to the garbage. Has he ever worn such fitting clothes before? You’re quite sure he never did, his usual style more of a comfy and layered one rather than a subtle, charming one.

“Are you okay?” He asks when confronted with silence and even his voice sounds deeper to your ears. You look from the busy room to his face and you can only nod at his puzzled face.

You’re not ready for what is about to come.

Therefore, you stay on your guard at the beginning, answering with short sentences and letting Yugyeom order for the both you. He doesn’t force anything on you, even when the two of you stay silent for a while. He knows you won’t become a chatterbox in the blink of an eye, for you can barely handle his presence most of the time. 
Still he tries, opening up about how he has been exhausted for the past month and how this exam period was going to end him. It pushes you to ask more, hence you end up with a lot of information, from why he decided to become a dancer to what he wants to do in the future.

Yugyeom is ecstatic. He answers with glee, eager to tell you more about him yet cautious not to sounds childish. He knows too much about that side of him and wants it to stay hidden, at least for now. He explains everything with care, from how he felt safer dancing, how it helped him deal with bullying, but also the opportunities it offers for the future.

You seriously never thought he had such deep thoughts about his career plan. He cherishes this discipline so much and seems to be so passionate as he explains how free he feels every time the music starts playing.

You can only listen, brain absorbing all his words and it soon becomes a comfortable exchange between you two. You don’t need to talk a lot, for Yugyeom always adds enough words to keep the evening alive. He leads the conversation like he knows that you don’t want to talk about yourself and he is fine with it.

It’s only when you’re done hearing about him that you decide you must share your story.

“My career path is a lot more boring than yours,” You start, fork playing with a piece of marinated artichoke. Yugyeom pours you another glass of Lambrusco but lets you speak. “I just gave up on school to work because I had no dreams for the future.”

Yugyeom hums and as you glance at his face you notice it doesn’t have that look of disappointment most people have when they learn about you.

Instead, he looks as handsome as ever, a smirk displaying on his now peaceful features. “So that’s how you applied for a job at the grocery store?”

You acquiesce, not knowing how to act when confronted with your own insecurities. You’ve never found yourself interesting nor worth spending time with. You understand how that country works and you know you don’t fit in anyone’s image of an ‘accomplished human being’. “It’s not something to be proud of.”

It scares you how you talk too much all of a sudden. You blame your behaviour on the sweet and sugary wine, but you know the truth.

It’s all Yugyeom’s doing. It’s all because of him and his caring face.

He sighs, breaking the peaceful yet dreadful moment. “But are you okay with your current situation?”

You think for a second. “I don’t know. I don’t know if I’m dissatisfied because it’s not what I want to do or if it’s because it’s not what society wants me to do.” You used to be fine with dropping out of school and not pursue a long and profitable career, but as you keep getting old, you start to wonder if it didn’t make you lose your value.

Nothing made you think otherwise, so far. Nothing and no one made you think like you were fine the way you were.

Yugyeom swallows his food and moves on his seat so he can face you, “You may think I’m a brat for what I’m about to say,” He wipes his mouth with the bright napkin and puts it on the table. “but society and what it wants us to be is bullshit. No one should be forced to do anything because of a bunch of people who think they know what’s best for everyone.”

You blink softly, finding it hard to believe that Yugyeom is actually being deep about such an important matter.

He keeps going. “My father used to tell me dancing isn’t a real job. He told me I would end up old and without any real source of income, that I would be a disgrace to the family and society. I promised him I would succeed and show him as valuable as anyone else I can be. I took a part-time job because I wanted him to see I could manage well on my own. So far he never complained, but I know he isn’t satisfied with what I want to do.” He laughs to himself, quietly. “I’m talking about myself way too much, sorry about that, noona.”

You shake your head, fidgeting on your seat so you can also face him. “It’s fine. I’d rather hear you talk about yourself than talk about me. There’s nothing much to say about me anyways.”

Yugyeom looks surprised, eyes wide under the thick layer of bangs. “It’s not true. I think you’re very interesting.”

You try to focus on his gentle face, your heart slowly clenching at the words. “You don’t have to, but thanks.” Of course he doesn’t want you to feel bad about yourself. He is always so soft and caring, why would he confirm the fact that your existence is nothing but a big failure?

He munches on his last piece of bread, laughing and shaking his head. “I mean it. You are as important as anyone else in that damned country. It’s just that we need validation, right? I used to think the same, but now I don’t care that much. I’m happy with the way I live and no one will take that away from me.”

“But you have a dream, at least.” You utter, not comfortable with the compliments.

He scoffs. “It’s all the same, noona. No one cares about a kid who wants to become a dancer.” He puts the fork down and gulps down the rest of his glass, feeling full. He didn’t except the conversation to be this serious but then again, he is happy with the outcome.

He can feel how you underestimate yourself because he used to feel the same. He hates how low you think of yourself but he isn’t surprised. It explains a lot, now.

“Will you show me how you dance?”

His breath gets caught in his lungs, making him cough. He is already too anxious because your knee is touching his and you want to see him dance? Good lord, he might not survive that. “What?”

He looks so alarmed as you laugh. Why does he have to be so adorable? “You don’t have to agree. I’m just curious, now that you told me how passionate you are.”

“We-well, I guess yo-yo-you can come see m-me.” He finds it hard to spit the words, his heart erratic and body warm with apprehension.

Once you're done drinking, you notice the silence is not as uncomfortable as it used to be.

--

Yugyeom almost fights you so he can pay, insisting it was his idea and you shouldn’t have to pay for anything because he wants to invite you and you give up, laughing at how his broad body takes most of the space, blocking you. You end up thanking him, slightly embarrassed because now it does look like a real date.

As soon as you’re out, he spins around, a tiny smile illuminating his now calm face. “Do you want to go for a walk?” He takes his phone out of his pocket, checking the time. “It’s still early.”

You agree, not finding it in you to reject his offer even though you are freezing and were sick a couple of days ago. He carefully walks, trying not to go too fast for he isn’t used to stroll around and glances next to him from time to time just to check on you.

You follow, eyes looking at your feet. Weirdly, you enjoy the feeling of walking around peacefully, without feeling obliged to speak and be social. Yugyeom lets your mind wander wherever it needs to go and you wonder if he also enjoys the moment.

You walk into a busy street and it’s only then that Yugyeom speaks. He finds the noises comfortable enough for him to finally speak his mind and takes a deep breath. He can do it.

“I really enjoyed that diner with you, noona.” You find him looking everywhere else but at you, but you don’t miss the way his face turns red.

You snuggle into your jacket, agreeing. “I did too, Yugyeom.”

He loves the way his name feels on your lips and he finally looks down at you, ready to fire you with more compliments yet fighting with that tingling feeling at his nape.

He sees you all hidden into your clothes and gasps. “You’re cold? I’m so sorry, ah, and you were sick.” His alarmed face looks around the street as he stops to face you.

“It’s fine, It’s not that cold any-”

“There!” He offers his best smile and grabs your hand before walking toward one of the shop. “Hurry, let’s get you some warmth.”

He grips your hand like his life depends on it and you follow, his long legs giving him a speed you find hard to keep up with.

Yugyeom rushes into the shop, aiming for the clothing section and grabbing a deep purple scarf. “You like the colour?”

Before you can even agree he rushes to the counter, not even letting go of your hand even when he struggles to reach for his wallet in his back pocket.

“Wait, I can pay for-” Any form of protest is useless with Yugyeom, who clicks his tongue and explains it’s his fault you’re in the cold. You’d rather say it’s your fault for not covering yourself, though.

Yugyeom lets go of you when you’re both out of the shop. His hands unfold the scarf and leans to wrap the thick knitted clothing around your neck. He scrunches his nose at how it almost covers your face but seems to be satisfied.

He is dying inside.

You blink, eyes barely able to look at him from behind the scarf. When did you become so obedient around him?

He made you loosen up when you thought you had everything under control. You don’t even mind, wondering when was the last time you got someone caring about you so genuinely. “Are you satisfied now?” It makes you tease him, feeling somewhat overwhelmed. You never thought it would turn out this way when you agreed on meeting Kim Yugyeom.

Maybe you knew. Maybe it’s why you didn’t want to do it initially.

“Very much so.” Yugyeom smiles the brightest smile he has ever showed you, straightening his back and walking again.

He doesn’t reach for your hand a second time.

Instead, he walks closer, still looking at the shops and avoiding people walking by. You both keep on walking, Yugyeom pointing at things from time to time to tell you more about him, which results in him explaining the importance of chocolate milk in his life and how he loves eating the same thing over and over again.

He makes you laugh frequently and always ends up feeling flustered which you find endearing. How can this kid be so cute and manly at the same time?

You end up to the conclusion that this is what makes him so charming. The fact that you always had to deal with his bubbly side made you think that he was only a needy child but you were wrong. He too, can be complex.

It makes it all interesting, from the way he seems to understand your struggles to how calm he can be when needed. You never thought he could be so attentive.

“Do you want to go back home, noona?” he speaks when the wind start getting stronger. “I can walk you home.”

You wonder if you should agree. So far you accepted everything, from the bill to the scarf. Maybe you shouldn’t rely on this kid, it’s dangerous for both of you. “I’ll just take the last bus.”

He seems disappointed, but also worried. It’s like you’re the younger one, the girl in distress who needs a man beside her for safety reasons. “Is it safe? I made you come all the way here…” He doesn’t insist but blames himself, his face now pouty and it’s the only thing you need to give in.

He gets you too easily.

You walk toward a bus stop, checking the time. “I just don’t want to be a burden.” You utter, more to yourself than to him.

Yugyeom’s cheeks go up and he is relieved, now. “You could never be a burden, noona.”

You hum, nodding and taking the seat at the empty bus stop. He stays next to you, hiding his ecstatic face into his coat.

--

Yugyeom looks at your building, fascinated. You don’t live that far from his parent’s house, but the feeling is different. It’s a cool neighbourhood, with brick walls and plants hanging onto the numerous windows. It suits you.

You grab your keys, the noise getting his attention. “Thank you for the food, the scarf and for walking me back here.”

The boy nods eagerly, feeling nervous. Can anyone die of a heart attack at twenty-one? “Don’t thank me, I really had a great time with you, noona. Thank you for coming.”

“I did too.” He looks so pleased with your answer. How? How does this boy find happiness in the most trivial things you do or say? It makes you turn soft, so soft you want to slap yourself.

You stop talking, eyes focused on his disturbingly gorgeous face. You don’t understand why that boy is looking at you like you’re the most important person.

You never imagined someone could feel that way about you.

Yugyeom waits for you to speak, but you say nothing. He chuckles, embarrassed for expecting anything and opting for a goodbye. “Good night, noona.” He bows swiftly, heart clenched.

He must run out of here before he starts doing creepy things. He can already picture Jinyoung smacking him for being too confident. Despite his evident disappointment, he turns around and walks away.

Yugyeom is proud of himself. He didn’t do anything bad – at least nothing that made you kick him and he is pleased with the outcome. He knows nothing about the future and how your relationship will evolve, but he is glad it changed positively.

“Wait!” He turns around before crossing the street, not believing his eyes when he sees you running toward him. “Your legs are so long; you walk way too fast! I couldn’t even say bye.”

You know it’s not true. You only snapped out of your reverie when he walked away.

Yugyeom opens his mouth, ready to tell you that it’s fine, that you don’t have to worry about a mere goodbye but he stops breathing. He literally holds his breath like he is in deep water.

The water being you, wrapped around him, on the tip of your toes.

“Noona, are you okay…?” he whispers, words jerky. Maybe he died of a heart attack a couple of minutes ago and it is what heaven looks like?

You part from him, hands on his shoulders and giggle at how lost he seems to be, before you.

“Next time, I’ll pay.” You breathe, not caring anymore about any type of blush appearing on your face.

Yugyeom makes you do things you never did. It’s as refreshing as it’s scaring you but it’s one of those days, one of those days you want to believe and accept something as bright as his personality.

So naturally you reach for his face and peck his cheek, sweetly.

“Sleep well, Yugyeom.”

--

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