#like if you casually watch the show and Hate the thought of shipping relatives then you good obviously

[kisskissbanggang]

Jumpspace Renegade - ep. 14 ✨🚀

[3.3k words, 12min. read - Stray Kids Multi Fic, Scifi!au, Choose Your Own Adventure - Jisung x Fem. Reader, Chan x Fem. Reader - SFW/Smut in Other Chapters/✨A HINT of Spice✨ - Navigating Feelings, Platonic(?) Intimacy, ChangLix is Figuring it Out, Ruthless Scheming, Ominous Plot Hints, Forehead Smooches, Lingering Looks, Cold Showers, Loyalty Crisis, ONE Kiss, Delicious Banter and Flirting and Tension, Always Check the Tags]

[Episodes on Fridays 7pm pst, Polling closes Saturdays 7pm pst]

[A/N: My first fic with #straykidsland! Definitely check out their network and follow💕]

[Series Masterlist | Come Say Hi!]

Chan really thought he had you pinned. Surely, an alliance with him meant you would have to knock it off with anything shady for the time being.

Too bad for him, he wasn’t aware that you didn’t exactly care. This was an easy choice.

Your alliance with Minho – at least in its conception – was purely out of convenience. Knowing what he was up to would help you plan for any eventuality. An alliance with Chan would afford you the same thing.

Of course, there was the whole issue of actually liking Minho, but what did that matter? The bounty wanted nothing to do with you physically ever since you took him up on his offer, anyway.

And it wasn’t like you deplored Chan. You just really, really weren’t a fan of him lately.

Still. Access to the captain was too valuable.

He continued to stare you down in the showers, cocky and sure of himself as ever.

“An alliance?” you casually repeated. “Sure. Okay.”

Maybe it was the way you so nonchalantly said it. Maybe it was that he wasn’t expecting you to say it at all.

Chan softened immediately, as if he had been tensing himself to receive your answer. You held out a hand for him to shake and he warily shook it.

“But you should know,” you casually added, “I don’t like to mix business with pleasure. If you ever come onto me again I’ll break your knees.”

Chan blinked at you, forgetting to let go of your hand while he processed this. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

“I used up all the hot water, by the way,” you grinned, cheekily patting Chan’s bare shoulder. “Enjoy your cold shower, Captain.”

The relatively cool air of the ship blasted you and sent a shiver down your back when you exited the washroom, wondering where Jisung was. His cabin door across from the heads was wide open, exposing the lack of the pilot inside. You peeked into the galley and set your shower supplies down in the booth. The digital screen installed next to the kitchen showed who was standing watch when it wasn’t displaying ship or planet time. Soon enough, Jisung’s name scrolled across.

There was one thing on your mind following this new development with Chan.

Obviously, Minho would be elated to find out.

And it would be wise to sort out how to access him with no more keycard. But that meant you had to be sure no one could randomly listen in on you. 

You crept upstairs to the bridge. By this point, you could assume most everyone was asleep. The bridge was dim and quiet, but a faint light revealed the pilot, lounging in the secret bunk in the compartment under his console. He flipped through a comic, smoking a charge clip and not bothering to look up until you sat on the floor beside him.

You reached over and clicked off his clip, getting his attention. “You want me to stop hating you?”

Jisung paused now, curious.

“Disable the function to remotely activate the talk box in my cabin.”

The pilot looked at you then, shrugged, and crawled out of the compartment bunk. He closed the door on top of it and re-seated himself at his console, clicking and typing through some programming before a concerning beep seemed to warn him before he shut it off.

“Done,” Jisung clapped his hands together. “What’re you doing tonight? Want to hang out?”

It was your turn to blink in confusion. “It was that simple? You don’t even want to know why?”

“No,” answered Jisung. “I’d just enjoy knowing you don’t hate me. So are we hanging out or what?”

“Uh, no?” you laughed. “I said I wouldn’t hate you. I didn’t say anything about not being mad at you.”

Jisung deflated, slouching in his chair at his console. “Fair enough,” he pouted, scrunching both eyes closed. 

Wait. 

Both?

“Hey, something's different,” you smirked. “What happened to your eyepatch?”

The pilot’s eyes widened, first in confusion and then in realization. He pointed at the light bruise on his cheekbone. “Apparently, all I needed to speed up my heal time was a swift punch in the face. My dude had an insane right hook.”

“Looks like it,” you chuckled sympathetically, but this back-and-forth gave you pause. It’d been nice having a steady friend on board. Jisung offered you a small smile and you broke down immediately. “Fine,” you sighed. “You want me to stop being mad at you?”

“Uh, yeah?” laughed Jisung, almost playful. “This sucks. I hate making you mad.”

“Then first:” you began. Jisung looked on intently. “Never steal my shit again. You could’ve been a grown-up and asked–”

“But what if you said no?!” Jisung whined.

“Then that would’ve been my right, asshole! So first: never steal my shit again. Second: actually pitch the setup at Sentury Station to me. Properly. With details. We barely had any time on Phaborus.”

The pilot sat up at attention right away. “Like right now?”

You sighed hard, but it was tough not to be a little smitten. “No, dummy, not right now,” you said with a shake of your head. “Actually think about it and plan it out, and then come to me in private.”

Jisung grinned in determination, new goals in mind. “You got it. You’re gonna be so not mad at me.”

“Looking forward to it,” you teased. You stroked Jisung’s fringe out of his eyes as a parting gesture, and you could feel the mutual longing you both had for a buddy tonight. Still, you had to follow through. You were still mad, and Jisung had his new conditions to meet. You turned to leave the bridge, thankful that Jisung seemed content with this development, when Chan ran into you in the stairwell, fresh from his cold shower.

Maybe this was why you were feeling a little exhausted. You’d barely had time to relax. There was always something to take up your attention.

“Up to anything fun while I was away?” he asked, unamused.

You brazenly pinched the captain’s cheek. “I was reading Jisung a bedtime story.”

Chan gently, yet sternly, gripped onto your wrist before you could pull it back. The hold his cybernetic hand had on you was steadfast. “Is that all you were doing?”

The smallest, most effective move you could think of to make Chan release you without causing a scene was an admittedly ridiculous one. You stepped forward into his space in the stairwell, your chest against his, your best doe eyes gazing into his stoic glare until he gave up and stepped back, breaking his concentration. “We’re partners now, Captain,” you reminded him. “You said that now you’ll know I have your back. No matter what. And no matter who I spend time with.”

Chan was steaming when you winked goodbye and trotted the rest of the way down the stairs.

You made one more detour to the kitchen, grabbing something to drink for the night. The tea you opened was refreshing, helping you finally catch a second of calm, when you heard a creak across the galley. The door to Changbin’s cabin was open, warm light spilling onto the floor, and there was the mechanic himself, thinking he was being sneaky when he didn’t see you lurking in the dark kitchen. 

Changbin jumped when he flipped the lights on, but his startle quickly faded. He pulled you into a hug and kissed your forehead. “Hey, I haven’t seen you all afternoon,” he fretted. “How are you?”

“I’m fine, dude, really,” you reassured him, despite feeling dead on your feet. 

“You sure?” worried Changbin. “You’ve had a crazy day. You saved Felix, for Christ's sake.”

Your primary impulse was to argue this. All you did was get Felix back to the ship. Minho was the one that saved him.

“Nova?” came Felix’s voice from inside Changbin’s cabin. He immediately started shooing you in Felix’s direction.

“Are you sure? He should be resting,” you nagged the mechanic.

“Go,” insisted Changbin. “He’s rested all day, and he’s been worried about you ever since you left to go fetch Hyunjin.”

You were about to ask what Changbin would be doing while you visited, but your question was already half-answered when you turned to see him digging through the cooler. For a second, you wondered if the two had ever properly eaten all afternoon or evening. You peeked into Changbin’s cabin, grinning wide when you caught sight of Felix. The blonde had regained his color, now sitting up in bed and bundled in one of Changbin’s hoodies. He dropped the book he was reading and immediately outstretched his arms to you.

“Come here,” he happily demanded.

Your resolve was shot immediately, unable to resist giving the man a hug after an insane day. You sat yourself on the edge of the bed and embraced him as gently as he would let you. He also kissed your forehead, affectionately cradling your face for a second.

“I’m going to thank you for saving me,” he explained. “And I know you’re going to give me some shit about Minho doing everything, because that’s exactly what Minho told me. So I’m going to thank you, because you’re the one who got me out of there and back on the ship.”

“Fine, fine,” you humbly relented, before you openly changed the subject with a sweeping wave. “So… Changbin’s cabin, huh?”

“I dunno, dude,” Felix sighed, still retaining a hint of a grin but sighing nonetheless. “Perspective changes when more important things come up. But it was fucking tense in here for the first hour or so, like, until he finally spilled.”

“So you know more?” you asked, trying not to sound too hungry for further developments. Finding out Changbin was married was huge, even for you, and you hadn’t known the crew long.

“Yeah,” Felix nodded. “I know more. Go look at the computer. He pulled more stuff up for me. The stuff I saw was just the most recent.”

You looked in the direction of Felix’s point to Changbin’s computer on his desk. There were messages upon messages pulled up. Felix continued while you browsed through them.

“It’s tough, Nova,” he exhaled. “She hates him. She practically despises him. She’s convinced he’s sleeping with every marine he meets, and she can’t stand that he’s had boyfriends before marrying her.”

“So she’s crazy,” you determined. 

Felix dazedly nodded. “Kind of hard to get a divorce if it means you have to be in the vicinity of a lunatic.”

“How do you feel about it, dude?”

The weapons specialist was about to draw his knees up when the wound in his waist hurt too much. He defeatedly melted back into the bed. “According to Bin, they got married right after he was drafted. Money was tight, resources were scarce, she had a good job, and he’d have reliable income. It was more to take care of each other than anything.”

“Do you believe him?”

Felix thought about this, messing with the sleeves of Changbin’s hoodie. “Yeah,” he finally decided.

“But it still hurts,” you clarified. 

“That he kept it a secret?” Felix asked. “Of course. Just takes time.”

The two of you relaxed in silence for a moment, digesting this. “How was Jeongin’s dinner?” Felix asked you, interrupting the quiet.

“It was good,” you assured him with a nod. “There’s leftovers if you want.”

“No,” Felix emphatically refused. “Whatever painkillers Minho gave me obliterated my appetite. It also made me ridiculously tired.”

“Then you should get more sleep,” you prodded, grabbing the blankets and tucking Felix in. This time, you kissed his forehead. Felix bid you goodnight and you did the same, quietly letting yourself out and back into the galley.

Changbin was right there, unsurprisingly. He grappled you into another thankful hug before relinquishing you, and you could hear him badgering Felix to drink some warm tea while you got your head back into your plans for the night.

You had one final idea for the night. With your magic keycard being snatched back by Chan, and the hatches to Minho’s room being sealed, you’d have to come up with a new idea on how to access him, especially if an emergency arose. You first dropped your shower supplies into your cabin and opened the closet, tapping softly on the back of the compartment. With Jisung disabling your talk box, you were no longer worried that someone could listen in on you. When you received no answer, you figured Minho must be sleeping.

Nevertheless. 

The best time to be trying to get this done would be nighttime, with everyone asleep.

You tried to look casual strolling out into the workshop when you spied Jeongin in the loft. He noticed you, too, setting his book down and waving at you.

“What’re you reading?” you coolly asked, sidling up to the workbench and swiping a laser cutter.

Jeongin nonchalantly pointed at the earpiece he was wearing, signaling that he was actually on a call while enjoying his book, and gestured at the proton slicer beside you instead. You blew him a kiss and tucked the tool into your waistband before heading back to your cabin.

Once again, the service access was arid when you crept inside. You held the flashlight from your nightstand aloft and examined Chan’s welding work. Thankfully, this didn’t appear to be metal joining the hatch to the frame, but it was some sort of compound that was tough as nails. When you charged and clicked on the proton slicer, the beam didn’t do anything to the weld. You rolled your eyes. Would the hatch in Minho’s closet be equally impenetrable? 

You crawled out of the service hatch and into the opening at the top of your closet, trying to move fast when you dropped your flashlight with a clatter. Quiet would be crucial here, since you were right under Chan’s cabin. You scrambled to pick up the plastic flashlight, almost jumping out of your skin when the beam landed on Chan, waiting for you in the access passage.

“Telling more bedtime stories?” he teased.

Five different excuses almost spewed out of you at once when Chan held up a hand to silence you. He simply pointed up.

“My cabin. Now.”

He watched you climb up, keeping a wary eye on you to make sure you wouldn’t run, before climbing up after you. From this vantage point, you could tell that the hatch opened into his own closet floor. You observed his desk-turned-workbench, covered in tools haphazardly grouped into some semblance of organization. A small set of paints were closed beside a couple of ship models he was working on, while a solder pen sat next to some spare panels for his limbs. There was a monitor mounted to the wall blasting an old movie, while a computer played a livestream on his bureau. 

Chan clicked off the strong work light hanging over his desk. “It’s amazing, how easy you are.”

“Excuse me?” you sputtered.

“I give you a juicy offer and I immediately catch you being friendly with Jisung and about to break into the bounty’s cabin?”

“What does Jisung have to do with this?!” you laughed snidely. “The cabin, I can understand that looks suspicious. But just talking to Jisung?!”

Chan seemed more than a little caught by your interrogating. He stood quiet, waiting for your next move.

“Besides,”  you huffed, “I thought you’re supposed to trust me now. How do you know I’m not trying to get more details out of Minho? Maybe I’m trying to get more info about what’s going down in Victory Meridian.”

And now Chan looked like his interest was piqued. You silently cursed yourself for mentioning Daedalus.

“Victory Meridian?” he smirked. “No one believes my gut feeling that we’re walking into something.” 

“Then maybe you should let me try and gain some leeway here,” you argued. Chan leaned back against his desk, and you sat yourself on the edge of his bed.

The captain folded his arms, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I like you, Miss Nova,” he sighed. “But you’re always up to something. Why can’t you tell me before you do shit?”

You leaned back, aloof and resting your palms on the bedspread. “You like me?” you cutely cocked your head. “I heard that. Jisung told me you like me a lot.”

Chan scoffed where he was leaning against his desk across from you. “What is this, school? Like I have a little girl-next-door crush on you?”

“You sure like to bully me like we’re in school,” you shot back. 

Chan held your glare. “If you’re talking about my unconventional approach to getting your loyalty, I think I have plenty of reasons to stay the course. If I keep being hard on you, you’ll either slip or you’ll be a perfect crewmate. Maybe even first mate material.”

“I thought Jisung was your first mate,” you challenged.

“No,” Chan shook his head. “It’s just convenient for us both to refer to him as such. He's the pilot, I'm the captain, and that’s it.”

“Maybe,” you posited, “if you keep being so hard on me, I’ll want nothing to do with you, let alone be your first mate. Maybe, if you keep being so hard on me, it’ll make me want to mess with you in return.”

Chan raised an eyebrow. “Oh? You’ll mess with me? What’ll you do, sabotage me? Play a little prank on me?”

The captain almost flinched when you stood up from his bed and took a few short strides to where he leaned against his work station. “Maybe,” you growled, “I’ll only stay in Minho’s good graces by fucking him.”

“So it’s been more than once?” Chan demanded to know.

“Way more than once,” you lied.

Chan looked like he could break something.

Hilarious.

It didn’t matter that the truth was far more boring; it only mattered that Chan was fuming at the thought that you’d already managed to sleep with Minho multiple times since coming on board.

“What’s the matter?” you pouted. “Upset your alliance didn’t come with a little punch card to come in my bed?”

With the way you had him back up against his desk, you heard a small creak from how Chan gripped the surface with his enhanced hand. 

“So I was right,” he smirked, trying to keep up and remain cool. “You are easy.”

You bit down the first snarky remark that came to mind in lieu of something more calculated. “And I was right,” you grinned back. “You’re jealous that Minho has me on call and you don’t.”

Chan’s kiss was immediate and brief, in equal parts due to how he backed off and how you instantly reacted by slapping him. His hands were on you as fast as they were off you, now limply holding onto the hem of your shirt. You had to admit, you sort of liked this about Chan, the fact that this was so complicated. It’s what you liked about Minho, too, unlike how you loved the ease of spending time with Jisung or Seungmin.

“Stay with me tonight,” Chan suddenly, quietly pleaded. You let yourself be drawn closer until your forehead rested against his. “No funny business; you can sneak out in the morning. I just like being around you.”

Your mind raced, your head reeled, the air in your lungs turned to stone from Chan’s proposal. Yeah, you liked the ornery captain of the Ambler, but you also liked other people.

Like Seungmin.

Who, as you’d realized, had no recollection that Chan himself had outed you for sleeping with him, Jisung, and Minho. If you cared, you had a clean slate. That wasn’t even to say that you could be preventing Jisung or Minho from becoming jealous, too.

If it even went there. Who said that you’d fuck Chan if you stayed with him? This could be your chance to ease the tension that was obviously between you, maybe actually become friends.

Or maybe take out some tension on him.

Chan’s lips on yours, his fleeting hands on your waist and in your hair, it was as exhilarating as it was relieving.

There were far too many ideas of what you could do here, but you needed to think fast.

#straykidsland #stray kids fanfic #han jisung x reader #bang chan x reader #bang chan x y/n #ALWAYS CHECK THE TAGS 💕 #and with that being said 😌😌😌 #i cannot help you 😌 #BOTH will be fun #just different kinds of fun OOP #because spoiler: #reader hasn't had a big heart to heart with herself on something that she's been thinking quite a bit #is it really that clean of a slate anyway??? #there will need to be some talking no matter WHAT if we want something in particular 😌

[imaginemcyt]

georgenotfound dating headcanons

cc!georgenotfound x gn!reader

tw: maybe like one swear word?

so george has a hard time showing affection and emotion. we know this, and it probably won’t change when you get into a relationship.

i feel like him asking you out either comes out of absolutely nowhere because you didn’t know he liked you like that, OR he’s super awkward around you and it’s super obvious.

either that or you have to ask him out because he’s too awkward and would rather just die than risk your rejection.

you’ve probably already been friends for a long time before dating, so he’s already relatively comfortable around you, but it’s different now.

if you’re from the uk, it’s casual movie dates at his place.

if you’re long distance, it’s a netflix party and facetiming until you fall asleep.

and i mean a lot of facetiming.

like, every day/night, before one of you goes to sleep, just to hear the other’s voice and then falling asleep together.

because your wack sleep schedules are synched.

you’d be the first to say “i love you”, and it wouldn’t be until you’ve been dating for a while. you know him well, and you know how he gets with that kind of thing.

you’d been nervous to say it but he was glad you did, because that meant you felt the same and he didn’t have to worry about you leaving.

he didn’t want to scare you off but he also knew that he had fallen in love with you, which scared him a little bit.

but he really did love you, a whole lot.

and if you end up living together, be used to him rolling into bed at five am and sleeping until three pm.

if you have an accent, expect him to playfully make fun of it and mock it. especially if it’s an american accent.

or words you say that are different in the uk.

“and then he tripped over the sidewalk.” “the SiDeWaLk?”

he notices the weirdest things, such as when you switch up the chapstick you’re using, or if the smell of your shampoo is different.

“did you get a new conditioner or something?” “uh, yeah…?”

i think george’s love language is acts of service. since he has a hard time expressing his love in words or physical touch, he does things like clean the house while you’re at work, even though he’d much rather be sleeping or playing video games. or he would attempt to cook you something, or put away groceries when you come home.

when it comes to physical affection, it’s usually pretty simple. hand holding? sure! hugs? less frequent but if you really want one, okay. kisses? even less frequent, not because he doesn’t love them, but because he feels super awkward and nervous about them.

when he does kiss you, it’s usually a quick peck where he’ll hold the sides of your face and just *smooch* and then turn away and make himself busy with whatever happens to be nearby.

on occasion, though, like when he’s jealous or insecure, he’ll give you a long and passionate kiss, just to let you know he loves you and can be everything you need. sometimes he does it when he feels like he doesn’t show you his appreciation enough.

if we’re talking cuddling, there isn’t really a lot of that. he’ll put his arm around you when watching a movie, but that’s about it.

when you guys go to sleep, he usually faces away from you and just *gog snoring noises*.

someone on here wrote that george would kick you playfully and giggle about it and i 100% agree, sadly i don’t remember who it was but credits to them for thinking of that and blessing us all.

you take a lot of candid pictures of him.

you also call him pretty a lot, which he gets flustered about before muttering something along the lines of “no you”.

going to the beach together and looking for cool rocks.

he asks you to tell him what color something is a lot.

“y/n!!! what color is this?” “purple” “thank you :)”

he talks to dream about everything, which means talking to him about you a lot. telling dream about his feelings for you (which he already knew), asking for advice on how to ask you out, talking about that cute thing you did the other day, or the funny thing you said earlier.

dream calls him a simp, which he responds to with an eye roll and the words “you’re an idiot.”

your identity would be kept a secret from the fans for a while, to protect you from getting hate or threats of any kind. all they knew was that george had a s/o, and that he wanted his privacy respected.

after keeping you a secret for a while, george asked if you wanted to join him for a stream, to which you were surprised but agreed to.

you got a little bit of hate from simps and stans who thought george deserved better (which is bullshit) but you knew they were just jealous and didn’t know you.

the rest of them, however, adored you. edits and ship art would be made after that stream, and you would appear as a guest on other streams going forward.

a/n: god he’s pretty.

#dream smp #georgenotfound x reader #georgenotfound #george x reader #mcyts x reader #mcyt #george mcyt #georgenotfound x y/n #georgenotfound x you #x reader

[uwurakax]

4. bloodline

“i ain’t lookin’ for my one true love, that ship sailed away”

ALBUM TRACKLIST

featuring tsukishima x f!reader ♡

track info it was an odd situation, being friends with benefits with tsukishima; made even worse by his confusing actions. to protect your heart you didn’t want anything more, but did he?♡

genre friends with benefits // hurt/comfort // suggestive!!! // time skip spoilers ♡

length 4.1k ♡

artist note love the lockdown extension lolol. also kinda love this but also hate it lol. feel like this one is lowkey special since i know when i first started watching haikyuu, i thought tsukki was going to be my fave. more suggestive than my usual ♡

“get it like you love me but you don’t, boy it’s just for show”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It wasn’t new to find yourself stumbling into your best friend's apartment on a late Friday night. It definitely wasn’t new to have your hands all over him, hastily and haphazardly throwing clothes on his carpeted floor.

And it most certainly wasn’t a new predicament to find yourself under Tsukishima Kei.

Inhibitions and anxiousness dissipated of the alcohol from earlier clouding your judgement. If you hadn't drunk, if you hadn't taken one too many shots, you may have been able to stop yourself from the never ending cycle that was this routine.

A routine that every weekend had you falling into the bed of your best friend.

It was wrong. Completely and utterly wrong. You knew it and he knew it too. But in the moment, in the here and now, the act of it all was too overwhelming. Too good. You couldn’t care less as you were lost in the intimacy. Too busy feeling the pleasure that nothing else mattered. Too busy being satisfied to think of the consequences that may result in the future because of this.

You knew at the end of it all, once sobriety hit, and you quietly tiptoed around Tsukishima’s unit gathering your scattered clothing so as to not wake him, that you’d regret it. The walk of shame as you ever so quietly shut the door behind you weighing heavy on you as the remnants of the night flood your mind.

But of course, the next week, history repeats itself, like it always does.

But of course, the next week, history repeats itself, like it always does.

But of course, the next week, history repeats itself, like it always does.

During it all you never let yourself slip. You don’t hug, you don’t whisper sweet nothings; and you absolutely do not kiss him. The actions are far too intimate for something as casual as this. It didn’t belong here. You didn’t want to tarnish any act of affection with just a routine fuck. It deserved better; it deserved love. Love that just wasn’t found within the sheets that you lay upon with Tsukishima.

You know you should end it, for his sake and for yours. It wasn’t fair to be tied down like this. You had to quit while you were still ahead in whatever situation this was.

So here you were, again, scampering quickly and throwing your dress on to find some sort of dignity that had been lost long ago. You grabbed your heels and jacket and made a beeline for the door until you heard a deep cough.

Well shit.

You turned around slowly, almost comically so, and saw Tsukishima leaning against the archway with his arms crossed. His hair was slightly messy, blond locks pointing in every direction. Eyes with his signature emotionless stare behind the glasses that he wore.

Well double shit.

“What are you doing?”

Triple shit.

“Uh… just leaving?” You don’t know why you voiced it as a question, but you did. The tension was heavy, and you couldn’t understand why. Was it because he had finally caught you red handed getting ready to go out that door and not think twice? It was stupid, you had always left, why would it be different now?

“Tch, whatever” he mumbled and made his way back into his room.

Well that was… weird.

Finding no more need to try and be silent, you, with heavy footsteps, walked to the door and closed it relatively gently. The cool air from the night was soothing to your skin. And so, with a slight pang in your heart, you walked down the street, hoping to clear your head of whatever that moment of exchange was with Tsukishima.

Tsukishima didn’t call or text you the following day.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

You had no contact with your best friend that week, only seeing him after 7 days in some club that Hinata had managed to drag you to. It appeared that Hinata had managed to bring some alumni from your year from your days at Karasuno, ‘a small catch up’ he eagerly told you.

You tried to keep your distance that night, your entire body feeling tense and stiff. Of course you missed him. He was your confidant, your shoulder to cry on. The one who had been there for you through thick and thin. No matter how rough around the edges he was, no matter how blunt or condescending, he had always been by your side and you had always been by his. You felt hollow and empty without him, as much as you hated to admit. You knew for sure it would boost his ego, and he’d never let you live that one down.

To say you had a lot to drink was an understatement. You had never bottomed so many shots and glasses of pretty colours before in your life. Your nerves and body were buzzing, everything fell into overdrive and yet slow and sluggish at the same time. Whatever it was, the many, many cups of liquid courage had you saunting your way over to Tsukishima and pulling him forward towards you.

The one boundary you promised never to cross was broken tonight.

It was sloppy, the drunkenness between you overrode the tiny voice that told you this was a bad idea. It didn’t matter now, and in hindsight you’d face the consequences tomorrow. You were just pent up and frustrated and you didn’t know why. All you knew was that Tsukishima was the one who took it all away, and that’s what you wanted.

Everything passed by in a blurr, you didn’t even remember who ordered the Uber; too busy feeling the moment with him. You locked lips passionately, refusing to separate more than necessary. It felt double intoxicating, the taste of his mouth and tongue ridden with the aftertaste mix of whatever alcoholic drinks he downed earlier that evening.

You both stumbled and tripped out of the uber, all the way into Tsukishima’s flat, connected at the mouths, still rejecting the thought of being apart for even just a moment. It didn’t take long to finally end up in your best friend's bed.

It’s not new, it happens every week. It’s like clockwork but somehow tonight felt different.

Even in the inebriated stupor you were in, you could sense, even just a minuscule amount, a change.

Clad in black lingerie with Tsukishima above you, you studied his face. It somehow helped you focus more on the moment, and also caused more of a haze. What exactly was happening?

Everything but Tsukishima was blurry, his face in clear clarity, and you saw his expression. It wasn’t much, or overly different, but you knew. You’ve known him and been so close to him, it wasn’t hard to see how much softer he looked. To anyone else, it wouldn’t be significant. To anyone else, he probably looked as he usually did.

But you weren’t anyone else.

The frown he’d wear, no longer creasing his skin. The hard sharpness in his eyes were gone. His downturned mouth now lifted. All such minimal changes, but to you, they felt exponential.

You thread your fingers through his blond fringe, instinctively brushing away the locks that covered his forehead. For a split second, you wondered how he saw you. Wondered what he was thinking as he looked down at you with a look that was so foreign, one you had never seen before. What exactly did you look like to Tsukishima right at this moment?

Any thoughts in your head left the moment he leaned down to you. This kiss was different from earlier. The kisses were pent up, full of frustrations and lust. Not this one though. It felt soft and warm, so delicate it was almost like kissing rose petals. A tiny voice was screaming at you, yelling out that this was a bad idea, and for good reason. Your head knew, it was for logical thoughts after all. Deducting and composing any and every scenario that could come from this. It’s why you always followed it, learned lessons and knowledge from experiences, whether from yours or others. It’s just how the human body was.

Your body moved on its own however, following his lead. You don’t know why you didn’t stop yourself, why you suddenly let your body move without thinking, but you did. It was so much easier to just do instead of think.

So you closed your eyes and let your body move accordingly, letting it express the words that, in hindsight, you were too stubborn to voice. You felt him peel off the strap of the brassiere you wore, the dark sleeve smoothing against your bicep. It was a strange gentleness that Tsukishima had never done before, like he was opening a present that he didn’t want to ruin the gift wrap paper of. With slim fingers, he reached behind you and unclasped the garment, slowly pushing it to the side. It would surely hit the floor soon enough. A sudden wave of shyness has hit you, the unexplainable emotion that shouldn’t be between two best friends. Not ones who had seen each other like this a countless amount of times. You wanted to delude yourself really, deny the possibility of why. You knew though, not even you could stop the feeling in your heart. Couldn’t deny the way your hands and mouth moved.

Tonight wasn’t just a good fuck, or meaningless sex. No itch to scratch, or routine lay.

Tonight, with your best friend, Tsukishima Kei, you finally knew the meaning of what it meant to make love to someone else.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Tsukishima was always so peaceful when he slept. No annoying quips, mean banter or any glares sent in your direction. Like this, he looked sweet, even cute. He’d certainly give you an earful if he ever heard those words escape you. You could feel the phantom ache of your heart, knowing what was about to come.

This was just routine, just like every other time before.

You started to shuffle away from him, getting ready to leave like you always did. You moved so slowly, much slower than you normally would.

It was just to make sure he wouldn’t wake up, that’s the only reason.

As your feet planted on the ground, you felt Tsukishima grab at your wrist. You gasped, startled at his movement.

“Don’t go” his voice was low and raspy with a vulnerability you never would’ve expected from him. Your heart would’ve soared, had it come from anybody else, but you could only feel hollow and an ache in your chest.

“I’m sorry…” you whispered, gently removing your hand out of his grasp. His face was flushed, rosy cheeks with what you assumed were the remnants of drinks from earlier that evening. He sat up groaning, as you padded around the room looking for your discarded clothing.

“You always go, why don’t you just stay?” You were sure the alcohol was fueling his system. Your Tsukishima would’ve never said anything like that.

“You know that’s our arrangement Tsukki” you tried to play it off, hoping to ease the growing awkwardness in the atmosphere. It appeared Tsukishima wasn’t going to have it though.

“Seriously? You’re still on about that?” He was scoffing now, visibly irritated as he reached over to his nightstand to retrieve his glasses.

“What do you mean ‘seriously’? We agreed to that, remember?” You stopped and faced him, your dress hanging off your arm as you pondered exactly what Tsukishima was telling you.

“Do you still believe that, or are you just playing dumb?” He crossed his arms, the familiar crease in his brow becoming more prominent.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” You raised your voice, furrowing your own brows that mimicked his.

“You can’t honestly expect me to believe that you’re still sleeping with me to get over that asshole ex of yours do you?”

“That’s literally what this is Tsukki, you know that”

“It’s been months since then, you really still think I’d believe that?”

“Yeah, because that’s exactly what’s happening. I don’t know what you’re expecting but-“

“But? Really Y/N, I know you can be thick but not this thick”

You were getting fed up. You knew exactly what Tsukishima was trying to insinuate, knew it perfectly, but even so…

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Alright, fine. I’m not just sleeping with you just to get off”

“Huh?” It was strange to hear Tsukishima be so blunt. Yes you knew exactly what he was trying to say, but to say it so honestly was a little terrifying.

“You heard me. This ‘friends with benefits’ situation, or whatever this is, isn’t working.”

This idiot.

“Look Tsukki, I don’t know exactly what you’re after”

Yes I do.

“But this is just meaningless sex”

The pang in your heart grew.

“We’re just friends, whatever it is you’re looking for, or whatever you thought I wanted isn’t true.”

Your breathing became heavier.

“It’s all just a good fuck Tsukki”

You had no idea why you regretted those words the moment they left your lips, but it was too late; they had already been voiced. The room was silent and you both refused to move. Tsukishima looked down at the floor where one of your heels was. He inhaled deeply and let out a humourless chuckle.

“A good fuck huh?” He repeated. You wouldn’t back down, too prideful to take back those words.

You wouldn’t take them back, you had no reason to, right?

“You knew that from the start, remember? I use you to get over him, and you use me as an easy lay”

“Yeah use. Exactly” he became stoic and cold. Exactly how he was with others, how he was with everyone else.

But you weren’t everyone else remember?

“Tsukki-“

“Forget I said anything, it was idiotic to say in the first place.” He turned his back to you, the action making you nervous. He never turned away from you.

“You can leave now, I won’t stop you. Just go like you always do” with those parting words, he left the bedroom and headed into the bathroom, slamming the door shut that had you flinching. You quickly threw your dress on, picked up your heels, grabbed your belongings and rushed out of your best friend's apartment, not bothering to look back.

Damn it all.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Tsukishima didn’t contact you for weeks, completely ignoring your phone calls and messages. You were restless and anxious, missing your jackass of a best friend. You hated how you left things, the ending of that night replaying in your mind over and over, haunting you endlessly. It was no wonder people didn’t engage in that type of relationship. Tsukishima caught feelings, and you supposed it wasn’t exactly that far fetched. You didn’t feel the same though, and you couldn’t help but feel that you completely ruined your friendship with him.

So, this must be the repercussions.

You knew this consequence was likely, in fact highly probable. You knew it could sever your relationship, you just never thought that it would.

With nowhere else to turn, you called Yamaguchi, begging to meet up and discuss the situation in person. He would surely know how Tsukishima was going, and perhaps he could relay a message, or even just give some advice. You hated to admit it, but you were lost without your tall, salty beanpole.

Yamaguchi was already inside the café shop when you arrived, a second drink waiting opposite him ready for you.

“Hey Yams” you pulled out the chair and slumped, taking a swig out of whatever beverage Yamaguchi had ordered for you.

“Hi Y/N, you don’t look so well” he greeted.

Well then.

“Gee thanks, aren’t you honest” you bit back, not wanting to deal with Yamaguchi’s unwanted comments.

“Ah, sorry.” The look on his face told you he was far from sorry, but you didn’t want to bother with it.

“You know, Tsukki doesn’t look that great these days either.” He took a small sip from his cup. You perked at news of Tsukishima, desperate to know more.

“Really? Is he alright?” You stared down at your hands, you couldn’t look Yamaguchi in the face knowing that you were most likely the cause of Tsukishima’s less than stellar health.

“He’s okay I guess, seems out of it and doesn’t really concentrate on practice at all from what I’ve seen and heard. He also shows up to work tired and even more grumpier than usual” Yamaguchi was eerily calm, talking about Tsukishima like this. Was he fine just knowing his best friend was carrying on like this?

“He won’t talk to me, at all. He ignores my messages and phone calls. I can’t get through to him.”

“Do you know why?”

“Yeah, I do”

And so, you explained everything to Yamaguchi, telling him exactly what had been going on between you and Tsukishima and the last interaction you had with the tall blond.

“Ah I see, I figured something was going on”

“Huh, what do you mean?”

“Really Y/N? You’re pretty daft you know”

“Hey!” Yamaguchi just laughed in response.

“It’s true, I noticed how you both were, and how you looked at each other. I can see why Tsukki may be hurt”

“Huh? What do you mean? It’s what we both agreed” you took a sip to calm yourself, an uneasy feeling bubbling up inside of you.

“Well, I don’t think that’s true, at all.”

“I’m still not following” Yamaguchi sighed and closed his eyes for a few moments.

“I think you like Tsukki and are afraid to express your true feelings” you were left dumbfounded.

“I don’t like Tsukki, not that way” you rebutted.

“Okay I’ll ask this. Why did you decide to sleep with Tsukki in the first place?”

“To get over my ex, and I trust him. I don’t wanna sleep with some random”

“Okay, and was that why you slept with Tsukki up until now?”

“Well duh, obviously”

“Alright, so how do you feel? About your ex?” You reeled back.

“What?”

“You said you kept sleeping with Tsukki to get over your ex. So how do you feel about him now?”

You took a deep breath and thought about him. Thought of the pain he caused, how hurt you felt the day you broke up, how hard you had cried over it. Yes, you felt all of these things but…

Everything was past tense.

You didn’t feel that ache or inner turmoil back when the break up had happened. You couldn’t even remember the last time you had actually even thought about him.

You shook your head and shrugged.

“Nothing, I don’t feel anything. I actually haven’t thought about him in a while”

“But you still continued to sleep with Tsukki?”

“Yeah.. I guess so?”

“And not seeing or talking to him. How do you feel?” You felt your emotions overwhelm you once Yamaguchi asked.

“I hate it! I need him to talk to me, to answer me. I miss him, like way too much I despise it! Honestly I’m agitated and I need to see him and- why are you laughing at me Yams?!” Yamaguchi tried to hide giggles behind his hand.

“For someone who says they don’t like him, you sure make it sound like you do” you paused, taking in his words.

No, you couldn't, right?

Tsukishima was your best friend, it was only a mutual agreement, something beneficial to the both of you.

You knew deep in your heart it wouldn’t last forever. One day the arrangement would have to end. You'd stop being friends with benefits. You’d both end up with other people and-

No, fuck that!

You didn’t want anyone else to be with Tsukishima, and you didn’t want anybody that wasn’t him. God, how could you be so blind! He was right that night, and you completely shut him down! And now your friendship was hanging on, and any chance of anything more diminished by the second, but you’d never forgive yourself if you didn’t try at all!

“I gotta go! Thank you Yams!” You offered a friendly tap to Yamaguchi’s arm and sprinted out of the cafè. You headed to the station, making your way to the museum that Tsukishima worked at. You knew he’d be working there at this time, and this couldn’t wait. You tried to mentally prepare for what you’d say to him while you sat on the train. It didn’t matter if he’d reject you now, he had to know how you felt. You hated yourself for not realising sooner, and, as understandable as it may be, you sincerely hoped you didn’t fuck it all up.

You ran to the museum, brushing and pushing past pedestrians in your way, muttering a quick sorry as they gave you dirty looks. You couldn’t care less about them though. Only Tsukishima mattered at this moment, and you wanted to get to him as soon as possible.

You panted as you opened the large doors to the exquisite building, the cool wood soothing against your warm palms. The receptionist at the desk seemed a little stunned at your breathless figure, small beads of sweat forming on your temples.

“Tsu-Tsukishima…K-Kei” you managed to say between exhales.

“Y-yes, he should be…”

You tuned her out as you saw him emerge from a corridor into the main lobby.

“TSUKKI!” Completely ignoring the receptionist, you used the last of your energy to run up to him. You started to breathe heavier now and leaned over, hands on your knees as you tried desperately to lower your heart rate.

“What are you doing here?” He sounded so emotionless and it hurt you. That didn’t matter though.

“I needed to speak to you and you weren’t answering me”

“There’s a reason for that you know”

“Maybe so, but you need to hear this from me” After Tsukishima didn’t respond, you took it as the go ahead to lay your feelings out to him.

“I love you Tsukki! You were right! It doesn’t work anymore! I don’t know when but I realised, I stopped feeling anything for that loser a long time ago! It was dumb and stupid, I know but what I said that night was wrong! It wasn’t meaningless, not at all! I don’t know why I said that. I love you so much and I’ve been going crazy without you these past few weeks and I don’t care if you changed your mind or whatever. I just had to let you know okay? You’re my best friend so-“ you were cut off when Tsukishima forcefully grabbed your face in his hands and kissed you. You felt all his emotions in this kiss; the pain, hurt, anger and longing. He pulled back, the sudden kiss catching you off guard.

“You talk a lot, it’s kind of annoying”

“Shut up!” You yelled, but he just smirked and kissed you again. Completely sober, you kissed him back, finally letting yourself feel everything. It felt good, kissing him, and you almost wanted to kick yourself for not doing it sooner. He was a surprisingly good kisser.

“I’m sorry Tsukki.”

“You can make it up to me” he murmured in your ear.

“I’ll wait for you to finish work, then we can head home together” you held his hand, noting how warm and large it felt.

“I don’t think so, after what you put me through, I can’t wait that long”

“Tsukki what-“

“Oi, I’m taking my break now” he shouted to the receptionist and tugged you along down the hall.

“We’ve got a lot of catching up to do”

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #hq!! x reader #tsukki x reader #tsukishima x reader #tsukki x y/n #tsukishima x you

[holykillercake]

Red String

𝕊ℍ𝔸ℕ𝕂𝕊 𝕏 𝕄𝕒𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕖!ℝ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣

word count: 2.8k

summary: You had any place in the world to moor, a stable and safe summer paradise somewhere in the South Blue, or you could visit the winter island where cherry blossoms painted the freezing horizon pink. The world was on the menu, and yet you chose to break into a Yonko territory.

highlight:  ¨What about you, Y/N? Will you try to put your hands on me?¨ 

warning: Look out for your arm, it might melt with the fluff.

notes: Hi, guys! This was an anon request for Shanks x Marine Reader. I was given the freedom to write whatever I wanted, so I hope you guys like it! <3 Dear, anon, I apologize for the time it took and I hope you read it! 

𝕃𝕖𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕞𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕤, 𝕙𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕥𝕤, 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕝𝕠𝕧𝕖!

¨I have to say, not a usual place for a Vice Admiral to enjoy a vacation.¨ a smirk bent your lips as you heard the playful voice of the man who courted you with another drink. 

¨Well, I´m no usual Vice Admiral.¨

¨No one doubts that.¨ He put the sword on the table and pulled a chair, sitting close to you. ¨You have grown, Y/N.¨

¨You have aged.¨

¨Oi, not very nice. You hurt my feelings.¨ the red-haired placed the hand on his chest, over the heart, faking an offended tone. 

¨Mission accomplished.¨ 

You stared at each other for about four seconds before breaking into laughter. As always, Shanks was louder, banging his fist on the wooden table and vocalizing his amusement to anyone who had ears to hear. 

¨It´s been a long time, Y/N.¨ he wheezed, still recovering from his overreaction.

¨Yes, it has, Red hair.¨

¨Red hair? Really? I mean, you tried to kill me way too many times already. You gotta call me by my name.¨ You chuckled, sipping your drink. ¨Especially when you´re at my house.¨

You grinned, shaking your head and biting your lip. Of course, the bastard would not let this opportunity slip. 

After years of non-stop hard work, you received a few weeks off duty. That meant that the world could split open, the moons could fall into the atmosphere followed by the sun, and you would not have to move a single finger.  

Issho-san would handle that better in any way. 

You had any place in the world to moor, a stable and safe summer paradise somewhere in the South Blue, or you could visit the winter island where cherry blossoms painted the freezing horizon pink. The world was on the menu, and yet you chose to break into a Yonko territory. 

However, the Yonko in question was more than just an Emperor of the Sea. Your lives entangled at a very young age when the Pirate King was still alive, and Garp had melanin left in his hair. 

You were just two snotty brats fighting your Captains´ battles. 

¨Anyway,¨ he chugged his drink and asked for another one. ¨I missed you in Marineford.¨ 

¨Well, I guess I missed Marineford myself. Had a good view, though.¨ you answered nonchalantly. 

¨What do you mean?¨

¨I had an underling transmit me the whole thing.¨

¨Isn´t that handy?¨

You tried not to laugh. It was stupid, but every time you had Shanks and hand in the same sentence, you felt the urge to laugh.

¨I wanted to see Luffy.¨ you said.

¨Why not go there, then?¨

¨Duty called somewhere else.¨ you shrugged. ¨Besides, I would have been no help for him.¨

¨You´re saying you wouldn´t help him?¨ Shanks carried a suspicious tone in his voice.

¨Of course I wouldn't help him.¨ You took a sip of your drink. ¨But thanks... for stopping that madness.¨ 

The man casually stretched his arms above his head, tilting his head back, enjoying the warm sun.

¨No biggie. You owe me another one, and we should be fine.¨ he smiled.

¨Who´s counting?¨

¨I am.¨ 

¨I already stopped hunting you, Shanks. Isn´t that enough?¨

¨Not on my book, Y/N.¨

For a long portion of your life, you had a personal mission to give the Red Hair the same fate as his Captain. Whenever his crew was located, you would be the one hunting them. No one dared to tell you otherwise. 

By that time, you had no significant position. Maybe a Lieutenant, Captain tops. But being related to the Hero of the Marines, well, that granted you some free passes, and as long as you could hand Shanks´head in a tray, a little nepotism didn´t bother you. 

Actually, although everyone saw you as Garp´s relative, you were just his first protegé, his first rescued dog. Apparently, the highly ranked officers were going through boring times and decided to pay their dues by doing charity.

The only one you got to know was Sengoku´s kid. Rosinante was his name. To this very day, you could not think of him without the twist in your heart. 

Even you didn´t know how to describe it, and honestly, you didn´t care. Was the job done at the end of the day? Good. 

That was all that mattered until another pawn entered the game, a very troublesome one, by the way. Slept like a rock and ate all your food. You couldn´t help but fall in love with little Monkey D. Luffy. 

He was the one to give you the answer you had stopped looking for a while ago.

In order to be his older sister, you had to be Garp´s granddaughter. Everyone loved the idea, except for the man himself. 

You were as keen as Garp to make Luffy become a great Marine. You bought him tailor-made marine onesies and shared stories about the seas. Whenever he spotted you approaching with the leather book in your hands, he would get restless. 

The onesies, however, those never lasted. They were thrown in a boiling dumpster altogether with your dream of him joining you in a job one day.

The sun was about to set, and you had just returned from a long and intricate mission when you received a call from Makino saying that Luffy had gotten into some trouble. 

Not only that, The Red Hair Pirates were somehow involved. It was all you heard before hanging off the den den mushi and hopping in a Marine ship, headed to Foosha Village.  

The idea of Shanks causing Luffy any pain or just giving him a hard time made you turn into a beast. But your bloodshot eyes were washed clean by the image of your brother, safe and sound, hanging out with Red Hair, who seemed rather... different. 

¨Why would you do that?! What do you want, Red Hair?!¨ 

A lot of things went through your head, but none of them could explain why a pirate, why him, would sacrifice his arm to save Luffy. There was no way he didn´t know about your little brother´s connections. 

¨I want to pay you a drink. But only if you stop yelling.¨ 

With a swing of his hand and a smile, Makino appeared with a jug of beer before you could spit fire on him again. 

¨They´ve been really good at keeping Luffy entertained this past year, Y/N-san.¨ she said, kind as usual, before leaving.

You sighed and took a seat by his side. 

¨Why did you do that?¨

¨I bet on his life. Just that. Why is that a problem? You don´t want to feel grateful for a pirate?¨ 

Your grip tightened around the cold glass, teeth clenching and knuckles turning white. 

¨No.¨

Gratitude was never the problem. You would be grateful to anyone who risked their lives for Luffy, but he... you needed to hate him. But no matter how much you tried, you couldn´t get yourself to do it. 

¨I don´t want you thinking that I owe you anything.¨

¨You don´t have to owe me anything, Y/N. But we´ve known each other for a while now, so... we both know that you will.¨ 

His lips turned into an honest smile, no teasing behind it, and you wished not to have your heart beating faster for it. 

¨You don´t kn-¨

¨Y/N!¨ Luffy entered the bar, running to you with the brightest of the smiles on his face.¨Are you done? I have to show you something!¨ he asked, pulling the fabric of your coat.

¨Oi, behave Luffy, I´ll be done in-¨

¨Nooo!¨ he pouted before turning to the opposite side and pulling one of his impish grins ¨Look what I can do! Gomu gomu no...¨ 

His tiny hand balled into a fist, which you watched stretch all the way to the opposite side of the room before coming back and hitting him in the face. 

Did his arm just...      

The air froze in the room. You blinked a couple of times, hearing a few gasps around the bar, your gaze fixed in the same place his hand was seconds ago.

¨Luffy-kun, why don´t you come outside with me?¨ Makino extended her hand for him to take. ¨I´ll bring some meat.¨

The kid screamed in excitement and followed her, drool dripping down his chin. 

So close, Shanks. So close. He thought, lowering his head on the counter and waiting to get chewed up. However, after a few unscathed seconds, the red-haired lifted his head, almost not believe his eyes. 

That was the first and last time you bowed to a pirate. 

Of course, later on, you punched him for letting Luffy eat a Devil Fruit. 

You swore to leave him and his crew alone, as long as they did not cause bigger problems, which they eventually did, but you had a debt you could never pay, and you ended up focusing on other things. 

Those things made it difficult for you to visit Luffy as much as you wanted, but since Garp had sent him to live with Dadan, you could sleep with a clean consciousness. 

Whenever you paid him visits, he would tell you about these other kids, whom he considered brothers. One you got to meet, Sabo, smart and polite. The other, however, ran from you like you were a freaking plague. 

Ace, another one with whom you had an inestimable debt. 

¨Humor me, Y/N. If not Foosha, why here?¨

You shrugged.

¨I was passing by, and the place seemed quite enjoyable.¨ 

¨Hm.¨ the wind blew stronger, turning the gentle swishing of the palm trees into a harsher rustling. ¨Should I get my men ready for a conflict?¨

¨Relax, Shanks. Right now, this is the safest place on earth.¨

¨What do you mean?¨ he asked, genuinely curious. 

¨Oh, come on.¨ you scoffed. ¨Not even the World Government will try to put their hands on you, and I´ll kill anyone who dares to ruin my vacation.¨

¨What about you, Y/N? Will you try to put your hands on me?¨ 

His gaze was heavy on you, conquering aura filling the place. You looked at him with narrowed eyes and a smirk growing on your lips. 

This guy...

You harnessed the moment to take in his features, a lot more mature than you remembered. Although the scars were deeper and he seemed more tired, his hair shone like fresh blood, and his eyes... you were afraid to drown in them. 

¨What would you do if I decided to put my hands on you?¨ you bit your lip. ¨I heard you´ve been terrorizing some kids lately.¨

¨Gotta give them a run for their bounties, right?¨ He laughed. ¨But I also heard some interesting things about you, Y/N.¨

You raised your eyebrows as if you were encouraging him to tell you more. 

¨Apparently, I´m not the only one spending recreational time with young pirates. And there I thought Marines weren´t supposed to hunt Warlords of the Sea.¨

A shiver ran down your body, already aware of the subject he was about to bring up.

¨Well, I have no idea what you´re talking about.¨ You said, giving him your best oblivious eyelash bat. 

¨Oh yeah? Because it was brought to my attention that you made some business with... what´s his name again?¨ he pretended exaggeratedly to think about it ¨Ah, Trafalgar Law.¨

¨Only time I spoke to him, he was a Warlord as well. And I just wanted to thank him for helping Luffy in Marineford.¨

¨You´re gonna start lying to me at this point of our relationship?¨ Shanks teased to eager a bit of the tension, and a scoff left your mouth.

¨First, you´re delusional. Second, you´re too nosey for your own good.¨ 

The two of you laughed along like you were not natural enemies.

¨Did you get to meet Luffy in Dressrosa? Heard they made an alliance.¨

¨Hm, yeah. But no, couldn´t get myself to do it.¨

You frowned, hurting for have had your little brother so close but not being brave enough to approach him. Good thing he had no idea about your presence in the scene, and you could trust Law´s discretion to keep it that way. 

¨He doesn´t hate you, you know.¨

¨Yeah, I know...¨

That was true. Luffy didn´t hate you for not helping him in Marienford, just like he didn´t hate Garp for standing in his way. He had too big of a heart for that. 

Shanks let you have your time in silence, empathizing with your feelings. He too had to make sacrifices by standing his ground before.

¨What now?¨ he asked.

¨What now?¨ 

¨Garp is retired. Joker is down. What´s holding you back?¨

The air got stuck in your lungs. The reality you had been running from, the question for which you postponed to find an answer. 

When Garp took you in, the alternatives available for you were restricted, to say the very least. It was either accept the kindness of a stranger or die. He taught you his trade and molded you into one of the best-skilled marines. 

As the time passed and you learned the ugly truth behind the World Government, the disgust and disbelief made you want to leave. Fortunately, your life was not stained by the passage of a Celestial Dragon, but how were you supposed to protect them, aware of the atrocities they afflicted to people?

At the same time, how could you leave Garp after everything he did for you? Of course, he would survive if you disappointed him that much, but you owed him your life. 

What made you stay, however, was something much less pleasant than a lifetime debt. Thirteen years ago, evil prevailed, and you lost something really important. Or rather, someone. 

Commander Donquixote Rosinante. Marine code 01746. 

He had a sense of justice like no one else. He was strong, honest, and fair. Did he make you want to pull your hair out every time he lit himself on fire? Yes. Did it bother you to have stains on your tatami because he dropped hot tea on it? Yes. He possessed the ability to get you on your nerves, but he was your family. 

You were supposed to be the greatest. 

Long story short, that night, at Swallow Island, you left with more than just his dead body. You inherited his will. 

You swore to take down the man responsible for shortening his life, and hopefully, in a later day, you could meet the little boy about whom he spoke so highly. 

It took you thirteen years. No more ties of the past, no more strings on you. 

Well, just one, if you were to be entirely honest with yourself. A string of a stupid tale, a nonsense legend, a foolish myth. The Thread of Destiny, supposed to connect two people together. They say the thread may stretch or tangle, but it shall never break. 

Bullshit. There´s no such a thing. 

But assuming that there was, why did you feel that if you pulled it to its very end, what you would find would be red as well? 

Red as the vest Luffy wore diligently; red as the nose of a cranky apprentice; red as the pompous sails of the Oro Jackson; red as the locks of the man capable of stopping wars with words.

Would you dare to be anything else? Could you step out of your own life like this? Could you abandon everything you fought for all these years? 

¨You know, I´ve said it in the past, but I´ll say it again. We could use someone like you in our crew.¨ 

You gave him a two-second smirky scoff before frowning again. 

Were you worthy enough to owe yourself the chance to choose? What did it mean, the justice coat of a Vice Admiral you carried so proud on your shoulders?

If piracy took a lot from you in the past, could piracy, or a pirate, give you everything back? 

¨Y/N?¨

¨Hm?¨ You hummed, gaze locked on the lethargic view. 

Hot puffs of air played with your hair and involved your skin in a warm hug. You could hear the gentle sound of the waves crashing on the shore, coastal birds cooing and the wind whistling over the rocks. 

¨Do you think, maybe, one day... I could ask you out?¨

No matter how many times you rewound the tape, you couldn´t find a different answer, a plausible reason for the burning feeling you held for him, whatever that meant. 

From the first time you put your eyes on each other, a contract was opened without even a handshake. A deal was set without your acknowledgment. An ironic fate tied you to the same string. 

¨Yeah... maybe.¨

#one piece #opfanfic #shanks #red hair shanks #yonko #emperors of the sea #Marines #vice admiral #monkey d luffy #op

[anthonycrowleymoved]

I know this is old discourse but in light of destiel becoming canon, what are your thoughts on neil gaiman not allowing Crowley and Aziraphale to be gay lovers? He said that they're angels, not men, so is that supposed to imply that they're not gay simply cuz they're non-binary (so they're asexual)? I just wanna know if they'e in love or not lol. I ship them so much.

yeah okay this is gonna have to be tagged neil discourse because thinking about this over a year later i’m still mad huh

so like. i know very well what he said at the time. he was basically like, and i’m paraphrasing but that’s because i simply do not care enough to give a direct quote but on twitter he was like ‘oh well angels don’t UNDERSTAND human concepts like GENDER and SEXUAL ATTRACTION so NO they’re NOT GAY’ and then someone was like ‘but they’re in love right?’ and he was like ‘of course.’ right? everyone agrees that’s what happened right after the show aired? and like, okay, i’m not going to begrudge people seeing this as representative of themselves if they’re nb and/or ace, that’s cool and fine, and you do you. i find it interesting that i saw a ton more criticism about it on here than on twitter, but that’s probably just more indicative of who i’m following and how much i’m on here than anything else. anyway.

let’s break this bullshit down and explain piece by piece why i think neil’s quote unquote representation in gomens is a hot garbage fire and why it kind of rubbed me the wrong way from the moment i saw it.

1. he posted it on twitter. he wrote the script and could have like, you know, put it into the show, if them being In Love was like, actually part of the story. he had the ability to do that. gomens was already going to piss off right wing groups because of how it treats religion, this wasn’t something i legitimately think amazon/the beeb would have just said ‘no’ to if neil was serious about it. mean, maybe that’s a bit far into conspiracy territory, but i truly believe if they really wanted to make azcrow canon the one person who could have managed getting a scene would have been the author/showrunner. and because he didn’t if you’re a casual viewer who’s not fucking following his goddamned twitter seeing gay representation is now a rorschach test

‘they don’t adhere to human ways of thinking about gender and sexuality’ MANY THOUGHTS HERE but let’s start with

2. i think hallie originally said this and neil i know you wrote the book but like. did you read the book neil. because i thought one of the main points of it was that aziraphale and crowley had effectively ‘gone native’ and saw themselves more like humans than like celestial beings. and they’d been on earth for all of human history. it’s a bad take i’m sorry i know he literally wrote it but like really. really.

3. look i’m nb and i’d love some nb rep. but that was not nb rep. those were two cis male actors playing (largely) male presenting characters with absolutely no in-text indications that they aren’t cis. there’s one (a few? god it’s been a minute since i watched the show) character referred to by singular ‘they’ and it’s not aziraphale or crowley. and like, look, i get that in real life there’s nb people who don’t go by gender neutral pronouns and that’s cool and fine because that’s what those people feel inside. but, like, this isn’t real life, it’s a tv show, and referring to male presenting characters as he/him and then occasionally putting them in feminine clothing isn’t representation because people who aren’t looking for that kind of representation aren’t going to see it, they’re going to see a joke about a man in a dress

4. and i’m not ace so i can’t speak on that, but i do remember at the time ace people being like ‘that....was not ace rep’ so like, make of that what you will. again, i’m not going to tell you you can’t see them as nb and/or ace, but like, i’m just asking you, was that really representation? like, was it? in your heart like, would you have been happy with that representation if neil didn’t tell you it was representation? because if you’re just starved for content, that’s FINE, you’re ALLOWED, all i’m asking you is to not praise the creator for doing fuck all.

5. ‘of course [they’re in love]’ again where??? where??? where is it neil. where is it in the actual text of the show. like there’s in text evidence that they love each other platonically and there’s lots of jokes made by other characters but like. i hate to say that but that’s it. i don’t know why this off the cusp response still makes my blood boil but boy does it

6. i don’t want to go looking for it because i’ve done that like six times but there’s a post on neil’s tumblr from before the show dropped about how there would be moments that people who ship it would be happy with but it wouldn’t become canon. you can look it up i swear he said that in like....december of 2018ish? something like that. which, again, is fine on its own, but combined with the fact that after he was like ‘lmao that’s what i was going for’......not my favorite look

what i’m saying is like, if he wanted to create an actual queer narrative he could have but he just like, chose not to and then when he realized he could have people watching his show just because they’re thirsty for representation that isn’t there i think he went ‘oh i’ll jk rowling this’ i don’t KNOW that that’s what happened but, like, that’s what it looks like to me.

i used to regularly refer to the “representation” in gomens as nu-queerbaiting, which i still like as a term, because to me it’s the person in charge (not the actors, usually, unless they have some say in the writing process) going, oh no they’re totally in love with each other totally trust me :) and then like, they’re not, not really, not to the people who like, watch the show but don’t fucking follow the author on twitter. and that’s. i’m sorry, that’s not canon to me.

and, to be honest, how this is presented honestly makes me more angry than if it was just maybe in-universe wink wink nudge nudge, because i’m USED to queerbaiting and i know that like, almost nothing ever ever ever comes of it and i get it and i like having fun anyways, so i deal. and like, i was a book fan before the show came out. the book was written in the late 80s, and i knew that it wasn’t going to be anywhere near as gay as the fandom has made that work for thirty goddamned years, and i was fine with that. like, going into it, i joked, but it was fine because it was a relatively faithful adaption of a book i like. i wasn’t looking for gay representation, even though i ship aziraphale and crowley.

but like, there was this wave of people who came looking for representation, and the show is so vague on that concept that they saw it, but it’s like. it’s not actually really there. there’s no one saying ‘yes they’re really irl in love.’ there’s two male-presenting characters who COULD be in love, if you choose to view it like that, but maybe aren’t. and like, that’s FINE, on it’s own, but i hate that someone in a position of power said ‘no you’re right lmao’ even though he didn’t do shit. it was made in 2019. queer representation should be better than that. i’m not patting neil on the back for doing literally nothing.

so like, tldr: yeah the rep is bad in my opinion!!! it’s not good!!!! i don’t like how neil handled it and it’s gross!!!! i hope this answers your question!!!!

anyway that being said azcrow is such a good ship anyway, so like, why does it matter if they’re canon? ship em anyways no one can stop me from doing it even though how it was handled by the actual creator is a garbage fire when you look at it for more than like, thirty seconds. like......why must a ship be ‘canon’? is it not enough to read a book and see two celestial beings, in love with humanity?

#neil if you're searching your name again and see this no you didn't #neil discourse #go #go tv #nonny mouse #inquiries

[lassieposting]

💘💘💘💘 + ghasdug

send me 💘 + A SHIP and i’ll tell you—

where they first met and how

So Skug says they stowed away on the same ship, but this is...not exactly true.

He stowed away on that ship, because he was running away from home and he was a snobby little lordling who'd never had to fend for himself a day in his life, so the furthest ahead he'd actually thought to plan was "they won't want to turn around and drop me off once they're underway".

Ghastly was not stowed away at any point during that trip. Ghastly was signed on for the journey as a deckhand, because Ghastly's mother told him he needed to, and it had to be that particular ship. Ghastly gets seasick, and did not want to go to sea in the slightest. But Ghastly's mother has visions and so Ghastly does as he is told. Apparently there was something important waiting for him on that ship.

Anyway Skug pops out once he thinks they're far enough away from shore that they'll leave him be rather than take him back to port, and he is incredibly mistaken. The captain is in favour of turning him around right there and then, because he's clearly some rich lord's brat, and whoever his father is will probably pay handsomely for his safe return. Ghastly manages to talk the ship's crew into letting him stay on, provided he pulls his weight like the rest of them.

Needless to say, even before they're attacked by pirates, that voyage is a rude awakening for poor Skug, and good lord does Ghastly hear all about it. He has blisters. His feet hurt. This shirt was expensive and now it's all sweaty. His hair is in his eyes all the time. He's tired. The guy in the next bunk snores. Some of these people look like they have lice. He didn't realise he'd be doing manual labour, this is servant stuff, how dare they.

Ghastly does. Not realise at that point what he has let himself in for.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved

Poor Ghastly gets to pine for years. Baby Skug isn't a great boyfriend. He's less invested - he loves Ghastly, but they have two totally different outlooks.

Ghastly is ugly. He's always been ugly. He's got a face he believes only his mother could love. He's never believed he'd find someone who saw past that or loved him regardless. So as soon as he gets Skug into bed, he's over the moon and ready to commit. He's like 17, and would absolutely settle down there and then given half a chance.

Skug, on the other hand, was a weird-looking child who only recently grew into an attractive adolescent and he is loving it. For the first time in his life, girls are noticing him. He doesn't want to settle down, he wants to play the field and sow some wild oats and have fun. So there are periods of exclusivity with Ghastly, interspersed with periods where Skug basically drops him to chase after the latest pretty bit of skirt.

who fell for who first ( if applicable )

Ghastly's smitten by the time they make it back to Ireland - Skug is a bit soft and allergic to hard work and a pain in the arse, but he's flashy and charismatic and funny and pays attention to him without gawking at his face (past the initial "good god, what happened to you?") - but Skug is well and truly settled into living with Ghastly's family by the time he actually gives Ghas the come-on.

where their first date was and what it was like

They went to the local tavern and got drunk, and then rode home in the pouring rain once it kicked them out at closing time.

When they got home, Ghastly's parents had long since gone to bed, but that wasn't necessarily unusual - once Skug, who has a considerable allowance, is old enough to start drinking, Saoirse institutes a rule that if they're not home by the time she and her husband turn in for the night, she'll leave blankets in the barn and they can sleep there instead. She's not having them barging in, wasted, at all hours of the day and night, waking her up after a hard day's work.

So they put the horses away and give them a quick rub down, and Ghastly is trying to look anywhere but Skug because Skug's shirt has gone kind of see-through and poor Ghastly is an awkward, horny teenage boy, but he keeps shooting him these furtive glances over the horse's back and Skug notices because Skug notices everything and lowkey teases him about it. "Want me to sit for a portrait? It'll last longer," sort of teasing, and Ghastly tries to laugh along but he's also vibrant red because he's been caught staring, so obviously Skug realises something's up

And he's precisely as tactful about it as he ever is about anything, and jokes, "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you wanted me," and Ghastly's ears burn and he doesn't deny it quick enough and now Skug's eyebrows are inching towards his hairline and Ghastly panics because like, he's ugly, Skug is going to be disgusted or laugh at him and he can't cope with either, so he just? Freezes?

But like. Skug was a weird-looking, unfortunate child who very recently grew into an attractive adolescent, so he fucking thrives on attention. So his response to this awkward not-quite-a-confession is actually a moment of silence while he mulls this new information over (this feels like an eternity to poor Ghastly) followed by an early attempt at using The Hot Voice and, "If you want me, have me."

So, they end up having sex in the hayloft on the blankets Ghastly's mom left out for them. Ghastly has never even been kissed and doesn't admit that he has no idea what he's doing until he realises Skug is expecting him to take the lead. He also blurts that he loves Skug when he nuts, so like. It's your typical painfully embarrassing virginity loss.

It can't be all bad though, because Skug's up for doing it again.

who asks who out and how ( with a sign? spelled out on a cake? just a simple ‘will you go out with me’? )

So in my endgame-ghasdug AU, they get back together post-TDOTL. Ghastly survives being stabbed, but the blade nicked his spinal cord, so he's in a wheelchair for quite a while, and then has to do A Lot of physical therapy to relearn how to walk. Skug shows up at the hospital/facility where he's recovering every day unless there's an emergency, because Ghastly is very depressed and struggling with survivor's guilt over Anton and doesn't see the point in doing his physio because it hurts and he's exhausted and he shouldn't be alive anyway. And Skug annoys him into doing it, mostly by heckling him from the other side of the room, because he's not great at the whole emotional support thing. Ghastly will mutter, "Christ, I want to hit you," and Skug will tell him, "Well, if you come over here to do it I won't even duck." And if Ghastly gets his ass up and uses the walking frame support thing to cross the room, well, then Skug will take a punch like a man and be happy about it because Ghastly walked.

They also talk a lot during this period. Ghastly feels like shit, and he reminisces a lot about the good old days and how he never saw Ravel's betrayal coming and memories he has of Anton, and sometimes that veers into memories they share from when they were young men. And Skug, at this point, is old enough and has been through enough to admit that he wasn't great to Ghastly when they were boys. He was flighty and selfish and high-maintenance, and he would've hated to be treated the way he treated Ghastly. And he tells him that, at one point - that he's sorry, and if he could go back and do it differently, he would, assuming Ghastly was daft enough to be willing to put up with him a second time.

And Ghastly laughs and tells him, "I'd still have you now, you stupid bastard."

who proposes first

Ghastly. They're 19/20. Skug thinks he's joking.

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away

Neither - they don't announce it, but it's not exactly a secret either. Ghastly's parents notice pretty much straight away, but other than a few parental pointers on what is and isn't appropriate, it's not really a topic of conversation.

where the proposal happens and how ( kiss cam at a baseball game? on a hillside surrounded by ducks? at a disney park? )

Skug's sister Confelicity accepts the first proposal she gets at the age of 16, because she's desperate to get out of their parents' house and away from their toxic relationship and controlling behaviour. Their father disapproves and refuses to attend the wedding (and, of course, their mother is not allowed her own opinion), and Carver is out of the country, so Skug stands in to a) pay and b) give away the bride. He takes Ghastly for moral support, because he doesn't like most of his relatives and also doesn't like the groom (Thurid Guild - their relationship doesn't improve when Confelicity divorces him a few years later to marry a baronet). While they're watching the couple say their vows, Ghastly murmurs, "We should get married."

Skug is right in the middle of his hoe phase and does not realise Ghastly's serious.

who’s more dominant

Generally, Skug. He is one hell of a force of personality and Ghastly does get steamrollered quite a bit, although he does eventually learn how to say no. Skug always gets things his way, always does whatever he likes and be damned to the consequences, and Ghastly is always there with a handful of the back of his shirt, pulling his ass out of whatever fire he started.

In bed, though, it's Ghastly.

how into pda they are

As teenagers, Ghastly's mother has to reprimand them occasionally for being too all over each other, but teenagers be rabidly horny. As grown men, they're just sort of casually affectionate. Comfortable with each other. When they're relaxing in camp after a day of travelling, Skug will lean against Ghastly to read a book or put his head on Ghastly's leg while they chat. They can have a silent conversation just by reading each other's faces. They'll nudge each other when something reminds them of an in-joke. They have that easy intimacy that comes with having known each other forever.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is ( if applicable )

As boys, Ghastly has a particular flowery meadow he likes to take Skug to for picnics, because he's a romantic. Skug at that age is considerably less so, and more interested in whether they can screw there without getting caught.

In the modern day, they go to see old movies. Ghastly was very into the early films of the late 1910s and the 1920s, after the war finished. He associates them with a time where he finally got to just set up his shop and live the life he always wanted to live. Skug hasn't seen most of Ghastly's favourites, because he spent that period of history fighting the truce and then spiralling into a black hole of trauma and misery, but he got very into the noir detective era to the point that he's still clinging to the aesthetic like 80 years later, so they'll alternate who picks the movies and catch each other up on their favourites.

who’s more protective

They've both spent their fair share of time fretting in the chair beside a hospital bed. After Ravel's betrayal, though, it's Skug. Ghastly retires as soon as he's considered fit to make the decision, and decides he wants to go back to Dublin to reopen his shop and just sort of try and forget Roarhaven exists. And Skug is absolutely adamant that he gets to do it. There's a lot of interest in Ghastly for a while - groundbreaking healing magic was used to fix what should've been a permanent injury, people want to know if he suspected Ravel, they want his advice on how to rebuild after Devastation Day. He's more approachable than China, and a lot more popular. But he can't cope with it all, and anyone who tries to hassle him in Dublin will have Skug to deal with.

how long it is before they sleep together ( can be as in ‘had sex’ or as in ‘shared a bed’ )

The first night Skug stays at Ghastly's family home. Ghastly is an only child, and his family isn't wealthy - their house doesn't have a guest room. It's sleep with Ghastly or sleep on the floor, and Little Lord Priss isn't going to be sleeping on the floor.

Honestly, he's relieved there isn't a spare room for him. He's never really slept alone before. Like most children of very wealthy families back then, he grew up in a nursery with his four oldest brothers and sisters, and when he was too old to live with The Children, he shared a room, first with Carver and then with Francis. The thought of being on his own in a strange house is pretty intimidating.

He moves to his own bed as soon as they get him one, but he stays in Ghastly's room, and he's perfectly happy with that.

(Ghastly is less happy. He's very much crushing on Skug and he's terrified he'll say something incriminating in his sleep.)

who steals whose clothes and how often

Skug gets to steal Ghastly's clothes for a year or two after he moves in with Ghastly's family. After that, they're built too differently. Ghastly is built like a brick shithouse of muscle. Skug is lean and toned and tall. When they're younger, he can more or less wear Ghastly's clothes as a nightshirt, but after Skug's final growth spurt, Ghastly's clothes don't sit right on him at all, and he's gotten too vain and fashion-conscious by that point to just wear them anyway.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are

Ghastly is fussy about his tea. Plenty of milk, two and a half sugars, leave the teabag in.

Skug just inhales it black, which Ghastly thinks is an abomination.

if they ever have any children together

Ghastly thanks his lucky stars every day that they have a 0% chance of accidentally spawning a skuglet. One of him is plenty.

He's very involved with Skugbab when he comes along, though. He's godfather and a very present uncle.

if they have any special pet names for each other

Skug doesn't do nicknames, and would rather not be given them, either. Ghastly gets away with "Skul", primarily because he's the only one who's known Skug since he was all of 16, but also because "Skulduggery" is a mouthful when all your blood is rushing to your downstairs brain and it's his own damn fault that he didn't think of that before he picked it.

if they ever split up and / or get back together

So many times. They're on and off again more frequently than Saracen's clothes. Every time Skug spots someone new, he ends it with Ghastly to pursue them, and then comes back when he loses interest or it doesn't work out.

what their shared living space is like ( messy? clean? what kind of decor? )

Ghastly's family home is an old farmhouse on the outskirts of Dublin. It's simple, but cosy, and Ghastly's dad is incredibly houseproud, so it's very well-looked-after. Skug prefers it by miles to his own palacial, but cold and unwelcoming, family home, and he tries to replicate the vibe later on with Wifey. It's pretty small compared to what he's used to, so it sort of feels like they're all living on top of each other, and he has to get used to not having any servants and drawing his own water to heat his own bath etc, but he's loved there, and that makes all the difference.

what their names are in each other’s phones

They're both old-ass men about some things, and this is one of them. So no emojis or anything - they're "Ghastly Bespoke" and "Skul". How romantic.

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first

Ghastly wakes up first: he's used to rising early to get started on his chores. Skug is absolutely not a morning person at this point in his life and Ghastly frequently has to turf his ass out of bed by pulling his quilt off/dumping water on him/yelling in his ear.

Reversed with modern day ghasdug: Ghastly still wakes at a sensible time, but damn it he left the army a century ago and now he likes a lie in. Skug never really stopped being a soldier and still has most of his military habits, so he's up with the sun.

who’s the big spoon / little spoon

Ghastly is the big spoon. Skug likes to be Held.

who hogs the bathroom

Skug. The boy is vain as all fuck. There is a grand total of one cloudy looking-glass in Ghastly's family's home and Skug spends a good chunk of the morning hogging it to fuss with his hair and peacock at his reflection. Ghastly is under strict orders Never to mention this to Fletcher.

#skulduggery pleasant #ghasdug #sp headcanons #long post

[unbiasedcabaret]

love death + robots

objectively the most badass name for a tv show

anyways here's my review of the first season. it is ranked. but rankings change depending on whether I wanna look at pretty animation or be invested in characters/story. there are short, slightly (extremely) stupid reviews next to them too.

(Also rankings are so hard. Am I basing it off of rewatchability? how impressed I was on the first watch? would I want to go back to that world? the animation? the characters? my investment in the story? Currently, I'm going off of what feels right and how excited it makes me basically)

18. The Dump: Eh. I couldn’t get into it. Boring animation, like it was definitely good quality, but nothing particularly interesting. Like okay, dumpster monster. Cool cool cool. This felt so long when it was relatively a shorter episode.

17. Alternate Histories: Never have I been so disappointed so fast. The premise sounded so cool, I was really hoping they’d go realistic with this one, explore some really interesting theories/possibilities. If I look at it objectively, pretty okay. I liked hitler’s long legs, did not enjoy the weird prostitute part, and had an okay time at the ending. Eh.

16. When the Yogurt Took Over: I don’t get it. Oh wow, humans are so dumb even the yogurt left us. Or oh wow they were so smart they got everything they wanted genius yogurt. Okay so? I didn’t care about anything happening, because I got over it kinda fast.

15. Lucky 13: Fun. I love pilots loving their ships, especially with this slightly sentient(?) ship thing going on. I enjoyed the rise to the top, could’ve been a less predictable fall perhaps.

14. Ice Age: Great start, I was hooked from the second the civilization started developing. Might’ve helped that I was high as fuck while watching this. Didn’t really go anywhere, there was no resolution, no reason, nothing. Honestly just felt a little underdeveloped, they should’ve pushed it a little. Very cool premise though.

13. Beyond the Aquila Rift: I don’t fully get the hype not gonna lie. Like I was interested definitely but the twist didn’t blow my mind it just seemed like it made sense. Didn’t have the ‘oh fuck’ moment and wasn’t especially blown away by the animation

12. Sucker of Souls: My favourite part of this was when they literally killed the exchange student. Very fun. Also when his head was split in half and it split into layers. Other than that, eh. The cat thing was interesting but then they never actually used it so what was the point. It just went nowhere and wasn’t that cool. Okay, I take that back the chase scenes/fight scenes/anything action was very engaging.

11. Shape-Shifters: I agree with that one guy who said bad-ass. I love it when fight scenes are actually all out because you KNOW motherfuckers tend to hold back for the sake of plot or whatever. I like it as a short though because it’s interesting to think about, I’m just not too interested in seeing where it goes after. (Which is a good thing because they did all the fun things in the short).

10. Three Robots: Really interesting, loved the characters, loved their skewed understanding of human history (kinda makes me question how much we really know about the past). Odd ending but high me was impressed

9. The Secret War: I was super into it. I love a good fight scene, great backstory, great animation. I just watched Aquaman and the creatures reminded me of those guys from the trench, especially with the flare at the end and I’m not complaining.

8. Blindspot: Why does this episode get hate. It’s a heist with robots how is it boring. I personally love heists, especially in the fast&furious style thing. I loved the characters too, and I’m now questioning my ability to get attached to robots this fast. Also enjoyed the murder, because I’m so used to people being saved at the last minute. I would definitely watch the fuck out of this movie because there could definitely be fun ways to fuck with the whole ‘there are no stakes because we can’t die’ thing.

7. Suits: PERFECT. So perfect there is nothing wrong with this like absolutely nothing wrong. I was into it, loved the robots, loved the characters, loved the world. Would wanna go back into this world and see more of it. Just the idea of casual alien encounters is so fun to me. I’d definitely watch this movie. Honestly felt bad when Jake died which is surprising with an 18-minute runtime. Basically, I view this as a little Pixar version of the show and I had a fun time.

6. Fish Night: So pretty so mesmerising so mystical. I wish the fish part went on for longer I would’ve watched the shit out of it. I kinda wanna go and see that whole scene again. Great short. Very perfect.

5. Helping Hand: Gravity but gory. Did not see it coming so it was a very fun surprise. Nothing wrong with this and I would watch again. Especially liked the part where no one somehow managed to save her and she figured it out on her own. (Not from a feminist point of view, more from a predictability point of view)

4. Sonnie’s Edge: Brilliant fucking animation (when the neon outfits/parts thing came I had to replay several times), great fight scene. I shouldn’t have been deceived by that dude’s girlfriend but she was good, so when she extended her nails through Sonnie’s skull it was great. Apart from the animation and the direction, the story did kinda fall flat now that I think about it. Like it felt a bit, okay so? types I think.

3. Good Hunting: Very great animation, great story, great storytelling. Loved the world and the way the world developed. Loved the automatons. Loved the combination of magic and machine. I didn’t expect her to be able to transform at the end so that was extremely fucking cool. Loved that she got her agency back and that the son was able to break away from his father’s habits. Hated seeing that one guy’s dick.

2. The Witness: SEXIEST animation. Spider-verse vibes especially with the bang! or whatever and I wish there was so much more of this. I was definitely more interested in the action sequences than in the weird sex stuff mostly because I saw no point to that. What was the point of the whole vladmir character when we don’t even know what he’s like. Like he was given way too much importance in my opinion. Technically she didn’t even have to leave that room. The loop stuff was pretty cool though like I had to go back to the beginning to make sure because- slight mindfuck. But I think this animation, and this beautiful beautiful world, was wasted on this average ass story. Could’ve been way cooler.

1. Zima Blue: Oh god this was a good fucking episode. Didn’t think it was gonna be this good. First of all the art itself was so cool. The were spray painting literal space rocks you cannot get more anything than that. Then his whole story? His origin? His truth? FUCK me. Also the animation was so distinct. It was so, it’s own. So specific. And it worked so well with the story. I don’t want anymore of this short in the best way possible. Also I thought of this art thing that starts like this but the blue starts becoming better and then a whole universe comes out of the blue and it starts right back where he started - murals of the universe. And his final work is a universe with like a tiny blue square to show that it repeats forever? Idk what that means but I kinda wanna make it but it’d definitely be plagiarism. Also I can’t do art.

#may 2021 #love death and robots

[vaindumbass]

((Happy birthday @dannikathewomanika! I got the impression you liked pirate aus, so have this:))

Sirius had never been more grateful that the Potters had taken him in. Of course, the time he ran away from Grimmauld and they welcomed him on their ship with open arms might be a strong contender, but it was definitely second-place.

Euphemia and Fleamont Potter’s son and his wife had long since gotten their own ship and crew, and Sirius had tagged along. James and Lily Potter were the best captains one could ask for, really, Sirius thought to himself as he looked around him.

The entire crew of the ‘Marauders’ was gathered, immediately after Sirius had simply told his captains that he had something to tell them.

“Well,” Marlene, their carpenter, said, “what is it?”. She was a tall, pale woman, with a scar across her left cheek. If one were to ask, she’d tell a different story every time, each one more heroic than the last, but the entire crew knew it was because she had managed to somehow fall face-first into a nail.

Sirius stalked into the middle of the room, and swooped all bottles and glasses off the table. He carefully laid his newly-purchased map down, and unfolded it. “This,” Sirius said, pointing at the left corner, “is where Tom Riddle is located.” 

Everyone in the room sat up straighter. They had been chasing Tom Riddle, a truly horrid pirate captain, for four years now, without ever even getting the slightest idea where he could be.

“Do you- Are you sure?” Mary asked. Even the hands of their surgeon, which had been steady while stitching them up countless times, fiddled now with her hijab.

Sirius’ voice was strong, and unwavering. “I am.”

James’ eyes met his. “What’s your source?”

“I got a letter while I was gathering our supplies. It’s from Reggie- Regulus.”

Lily extended a hand. Sirius wordlessly handed it over to her.

She whistled between her teeth. “Sirius, this is big.”

“Believe me, I know.”

Remus Lupin stood up. He was only a navigator, yet he had the most scars out of all of them. “How can we trust him? Hasn’t Regulus been with the Death Eaters all this time?”

“I trust Sirius.” Lily said, her voice cold. At that moment she wasn’t their friend, not the Lily who had had rum coming out of her nose when she laughed too hard at something Marlene had said, but she was their captain.

Lupin sat down, his jaw locked.

As everyone started to file out of the door, to their own quarters, Lily stopped next to Sirius. “James and I are trying to get pregnant.”

“Oh.” Sirius said, completely baffled.

“So you better make sure our trust isn’t misplaced. Our child needs his parents and his godparent.” 

“Right.” Sirius said, still busy processing the earlier information. “Wait- Godparent? I would be their godfather?”

But Lily was already gone, with a swish of her red hair and a twinkle of her laugh.

Sirius couldn’t help but laugh a little to himself, too. A godfather, him.

~~~

When he emerged on the deck, there was someone already standing there. “Lupin.” Sirius said.

“Sirius.”

Lupin had been a relatively new addition, but good navigators were hard to come by, and he was good. He’d been getting along well with everyone, until now. 

“I suppose I should apologize.” Lupin said, looking out wistfully over the ocean. “It’s just-- I quite dislike Tom Riddle, you see.”

Sirius huffed a laugh, walking forward until he was standing next to Lupin, mirroring his position. “Don’t we all?”

Lupin painted quite the pretty picture, his brown curls waving a little in the wind, his face illuminated by the setting sun. Sirius quickly turned his head back to the sea.

“Ah, my hate for him feels a little more... personal. Fenrir Greyback- I assume you’ve heard of him?”

“I have.”

“He attacked me when I was five.”

Sirius turned to look at Remus so fast it was a surprise he didn’t break anything. Sirius had known of Greyback’s underhanded tactics, who hadn’t? Still, that did not make this any less horrible.”

Remus still looked perfectly calm. At Sirius’ surprised stare, he said: “At Riddle’s command, I mean.”

“Yeah. Yeah I got that.”

A silence fell, for a while.

“I’m sorry.” Sirius said.

Remus shrugged. “Wasn’t your fault. It’s a long time ago, anyway.”

Once again, their conversation halted, no matter how much Sirius would love to keep talking to this intriguing man (he had forgiven Remus the moment he tucked a strand of his hair behind his ear. Or maybe when the last bit of sun had hit his face just so. Or maybe-- well, suffice to say, Sirius harboured no ill feelings towards him)

Suddenly, Remus stretched. “Well,” he said, and Sirius only looked because that’s the polite thing to do when someone talks to you, and not at all because of the small sliver of skin that showed, “I’ll make sure we get to Riddle’s ship in time, alright?”

This was accompanied by a hand on Sirius’ shoulder, so he could only nod mutely, and look on as Remus walked away.

~~~

“You know what, Black? You might regret it if you don’t make your move now.”

Sirius looked at Dorcas, their master gunner, who was lounging casually against the mast, her hair falling over her shoulders in tight twists. Then he followed her line of sight to where Remus and Marlene were talking. “Are you talking to me, or to yourself?”

With a quick movement of her shoulders, Dorcas pushed herself back on her feet. “Who says I can’t do both?” 

Remus smiled at Marlene’s animated face, his body language relaxed. 

“I’ll make you a deal, Meadowes. If we come out of this alive, we confess.” 

“Deal. If you die, though, I’ll kill you.” 

They shook hands.

The Marauders had a lot of allies, but there was an enormous chance they would be noticed if they went with more than one ship. According to Regulus, there was only one ship anyway, safely anchored for the night. 

Sirius would be the first to enter, together with Dorcas. They wanted to keep the element of surprise, Sirius could make his steps so silent they called him Padfoot, Dorcas was their best fighter, it only seemed the most logical decision. 

Regulus would be taking guard duty tonight so they should, hopefully, be able to stay hidden for a while. 

~~~

“You did get us here in time.” Sirius says, because he still hasn’t managed to silence that little voice in him that’s begging him to say something, anything, to the man in front of him.

“I said I would, didn’t I?” There are bags under Remus’ eyes, and Sirius doesn’t exactly know what a navigator’s job entails but he’s pretty sure you don’t need to run yourself ragged.

“You did, you did. But why not go to sleep now? We only attack during nightfall.” 

Sirius has spent a long time cataloguing Remus’ every smile. This one seems to be his typical half-grin, only the complete lack of sleep is making it seem... weirdly genuine. “You drive a hard bargain, Black.”

Sirius grins back unabashedly. “Wouldn’t be a good boatswain otherwise.” 

“Keep telling yourself that.” Remus puts up one hand to wave as he walks away. Sirius waves back, even though Remus’ back is turned to him. 

That might be why he doesn’t notice Dorcas until she swings an arm around him. “God, you’re so gone for that guy.” 

Sirius pushes her back with a smile. “Like you’re one to talk.” 

“True, true.” Dorcas sighs, “I’ve fought countless people, but she just- smiles or whatever and I’m defenseless.” 

Sirius snorts, “That reminds me, didn’t you tell her the chair she made was, and I quote, “very sittable”?” 

“In my defense, it was!” 

“At least you’re not constantly complaining about ‘bumpy’ chairs.”

Dorcas looks up at the sky dreamily. “Yeah... Wait, do you think she did it because of that? Because of me?” 

“What other reason is there? She must... like you.” 

“I can’t wait until today is over so I can know for sure.”

Silently, Sirius agrees.

~~~

Sirius likes being the boatswain, he does. It’s fun haggling with people and then stealing it from under their noses, he likes teasing Peter about the amount of potatoes they need, and he likes being able to, sometimes, get Remus chocolate (out of his own pocket, of course, although he doesn’t tell Remus that).

It still doesn’t compare to this. Feeling as invisible as a shadow in the night simply stills a hunger in Sirius he doesn’t always realize he has. For a moment all worries are forgotten, his mind as clear as the night sky, except for his goal.

His and Dorcas’ boots barely make a sound as they walk over the deck. Regulus greets them with a limp body in his hands.

“Watch duty is always done in pairs,” he explains.

Sirius cringes a little at the intrusion of the silence, but nods. 

“Dorcas,” Regulus says, “it would be better if you went first. I need to talk to Sirius.

“Make it quick.” 

“What is it?” Sirius hisses.

“Riddle keeps a part of his seven treasures here.” 

Sirius’ eyes widen. Riddle’s treasures were each extremely valuable and highly sought-after. “Which one?” 

“The medal. It contains the location of the other ones.”

Bringing Riddle to justice, or whatever, meant nothing if he could immediately bail himself out. Besides, having a bit of extra cash was always good. “Fuck. Okay. Lead the way.”

After they had walked for a bit, Sirius couldn’t help but ask: “Why couldn’t Dorcas come with us?”

Regulus shrugged, illuminated in strange shapes by the torch he was holding. “I don’t know her. And I didn’t- I didn’t want to see what they’d do to our parents.”

They walk the rest of the way in silence, until they arrive at the treasure room. Bellatrix is guarding it, because of course she is, his cousin has always been a bit too crazy to be anything but loyal to Riddle.

There are two other guards, but before Sirius knows it Regulus has already said: “I’ll distract them.” and then Regulus is suddenly gone, attacking one of the guards quickly and then running away, two of the guards hot on his heels.

Sirius doesn’t even have the time to stop him. In a reflex, he’d stepped forward, and this is when Bellatrix saw him. Now there’s a sword at his throat. “Long time no see, Siri.”

Sirius moves his knife to the hilt to the sword, and pushes it back in one big movement, immediately after aiming for her heart. “I had so hoped it would be an even longer time.” 

Bellatrix eyes glitter maniacally as she deflects his knife. “Tough luck.”

“You know,” Sirius says while trying to hook his foot behind her ankle, “You could just let me in. It would spare both of us a lot of time.”

Bellatrix sidesteps him, and then her sword is suddenly coming awfully close to his stomach. “But where’s the fun in that?”

The sword brushes his shirt as it moves past him, and Sirius fights on in silence.

Until he hears footsteps. He looks up at the same time as Bellatrix does, covered in sweat and with blood on his clothes, and he sees Remus.

Lovely, beautiful, amazing Remus.

“Duck!” Remus shouts, and Sirius does so without a second thought, and then there are two swords above his head.

Lucky for him, Remus’ is the one that strikes true. Bellatrix seems almost surprised at the sword in her arm, which gives Sirius the chance to knock her out. 

As soon as she’s fallen to the ground, Sirius clasps Remus’ arms. “You’re here? How did you find me?” 

“I-” Remus says, letting his eyes fall shut and his forehead settle against Sirius. “You weren’t where you said you would be.” 

“You missed me?” it was meant to be teasing, really, but it came out awfully sincere.

“Of course,” Remus whispers back hoarsely, opening his eyes again.

Sirius looks back at him, and then he kisses him.

It’s messy, and rushed, and absolutely perfect. Remus lips are soft but chapped, and while Riddle’s medal is right behind him, Sirius thinks he already has the greatest treasure the world has to offer in his arms.

#also dan thanks very much for warning me a few days in advance #i understand why you write them pirate aus are such fun! #wolfstar #remus lupin #sirius black #I hope you buy some good yarn!! #yes this ending is very cheesy but endings are HARD okay #james potter #lily potter #jily #dorlene #sorry for inaccuracies ALL the research i did was: what kind of jobs pirate ship #wolfstar fanfiction #wolfstar fluff #Peter simply always carries a potato in his pants #iykyk #peter pettigrew #mary macdonald #marauders #marauders era #this is the reasons you couldn't ask questions or read over my action scenes aksdlkjha #wouldnt want to spoil the surprise!

[s8ncake]

So a random Mammon/Barbatos moment I thought of. Don’t ask about the nickname I gave Barbatos. I don’t see him being into Mammon calling him Babe/Baby/Bae. I think at first the nickname was cute and Barbatos liked it and then someone showed him what his nickname was in the human world 😂

Mammon is laying across the couch after another failed attempt at pranking Lucifer. Barbatos watches in amusement as his boyfriend whines and complains and just casually sipping on tea. When it hits Mammon, Barbatos can see the future, so Barbatos will know what prank will work and which ones won’t. Finally Mammon comes up with an idea that will at least get a reaction from Lucifer.

“What’s the punishment?”

“You are suspended from the ceiling for two days”

“Only two days?! For that prank? HA! Lucifer has done so much worse! Thanks Barbie! This is gonna be great!”

“You know I hate it when you call me that,”

“And you should be able to see that I’m not gonna stop,”

Barbatos smiles despite himself when Mammon presses a kiss on the top of his head before heading off to start preparing for the prank.

I just love the ship, it’s so chaotic? Like Lucifer and Diavolo almost lose their mind over it, well more like Lucifer does. Diavolo thinks it’s adorable and Lucifer’s confusion adds to Diavolo’s amusement.

@yukiobeyme

First of all, yes. This is 100% perfect.💚💚💚

Barbie is a very cute nickname! (And definitely the one that Barbatos prefers, besides just being called Barb)

One of the scenes in Special Relativity involves him leaping into Mammon’s arms when he sees a mouse, and Mammon teases him by calling him Mousy. It’s a nickname that kinda sticks, and Barbatos chases after him every time he uses it. (The first time he called Barbatos that was actually what led him to breaking the vase in Checkmate).

Anyways, Barbatos definitely helps Mammon out with pranks whenever he can. And maybe he helps improve them a bit. Perhaps Diavolo needs to be taught a lesson as well, or maybe Lucifer could use some additional time away from work. Either way Mammon’s pranks have never been more successful, and surprisingly enough he doesn’t get into as much trouble. (Most likely due to Barbatos’s tips).

Lucifer doesn’t know what to think of it. At first he assumes that Barbatos will help wrangle him in, but he’s just as stubborn as ever. (“I am your brother’s boyfriend, not his keeper” he says as he casually flips through a newspaper). Lucifer is even more perturbed when he catches them having tea together. (Barbatos managed to find a blend that Mammon liked!)

That being said, sometimes Barbatos will stop or punish Mammon preemptively. It doesn’t happen often, only when Mammon’s ideas are exceptionally dumb, or when they involve an outrageous crime.

(But of course, Mammon doesn’t hate it when Barbatos brings out the whip. If anything, it makes him excited)

#long post #mammobarb #yukiobeyme #what is a couple without some chaos #all couples need one person who is a chaotic mess #and the other one who helps wrangle them in #it’s how balance is achieved 😌

[chaosqueery]

Title: The Great Train Escape

Rating: G

Word Count: 1,765

Characters/Ships: Louise Belcher/ Rudolph “Regular Sized Rudy” Steiblitz

Description:  When Louise hears that Rudy's father is still making him spend his Saturdays in the Juice Caboose, she decides to do something about it.

Alternative Links: (AO3)

A/N:  This idea came to me after watching both 'My Girl' and 'Bridge to Terabithia' within a relatively short time of each other. But don't worry. Both make it out alive just fine in this.

Rudy sat on the hard floor of his Saturday morning cell, the juice caboose, lonely and without any proper stimulation. Every week, he tried to put a positive spin on it. At least he got all the juice he could possibly want, right? Plus, it was a nice time to get his weekend homework done, while nearly all the other kids in his class waited until Sunday night and had to rush to finish. So, yeah. He could still manage a smile and maintain his politeness when boarding the train.

At the moment, however, he couldn’t be any more bored.

Rudy emptied the last bit of grape juice from its box and threw it at the wastebasket. When he missed, he let out a small groan, walked the few steps it took to grab the empty box, returned to his spot, and tried again. He repeated it a few more times, never making a basket until he saw something fly past the corner of his eye.

Interest peaked, he turned to investigate and found a paper airplane had landed on the floor. He was almost too excited for the break-in his monotonous trek around the lake, he hurried toward the plane, and unfolded it. A hastily written message was scrawled out on the page reading: ‘Prison break! Go to the window. -LB’

His breathing labored a bit with excitement, so after taking a puff off his inhaler he rushed over to the open window and saw his best friend, Louise, riding her bike alongside the train.

“Louise!” He called out happily. “What are you doing?”

“Ugh! Didn’t you read the note? I am busting you out of there!”

“But I don’t have anything to climb down with.”

“I got you covered, buddy.” She takes one hand off the handlebars of her bike and shrugs off her backpack. “Move your head away from the window!” Louise ordered, preparing to throw the bag.

Rudy did as he was told and a moment later the backpack flew in through the window on her first try. Damn. Her aim was most certainly better than his. He opened the bag and wound up pulling out a long rope ladder.

“You got it?” He heard Louise yell.

“Yeah!”

“Then hook it on the bottom of the window and climb down!”

Rudy was about to follow her instructions when something suddenly occurred to him. “Hold on a minute!” Rudy rushed out of the bathroom and grabbed his own backpack. He then ripped out a clean sheet of paper from one of his notebooks, wrote a quick note, then placed it on the floor where it could easily be found.

Ready to go, Rudy went back over to the window, hooked the metal part of the ladder over the bottom edge, and threw the rest of it over to dangle outside. He then gripped tightly onto the rope and climbed out of the window. He tried to take one step at a time as gracefully as he could, but the swaying of the ladder made it hard. Thankfully he managed to finally make it to the bottom and stepped off.

“So you can climb down a ladder out of a moving train, but can’t climb off a bunk bed without breaking your arm?” Louise asked when she stopped her bike next to him and planted her feet on the ground.

“Yeah, well…” He scratched the back of his head, not really having an explanation for it.

“What took you so long anyway?”

“I had to leave a note for Ethan saying I was okay and that I’d be back.”

“Oh, crap.”Louise face-palmed. “I don’t know how I forgot about him. Will he get you in trouble?”

“No, I don’t think so. He’s been super nice to me ever since the last time you were here. I think he feels a lot of remorse for what he did to Bean Bag.” Rudy frowned at the thought of his poor old friend who was torn apart. “What made you want to come to bust me out anyway?”

Louise shrugged casually. Really, she felt bad when he told her the other day that his father still dragged him on these wine train trips and had to spend a significant amount of his Saturday alone with nothing to do. She wouldn’t care if it were anyone else. But Rudy was always so nice about everything and rarely ever complained. His weekends should be better than this. Louise, however, was not about to reveal the soft spot she had for him. “Today was one of the few Saturdays I have off from working at the restaurant while Tina and Gene don’t. I got bored, thought I’d spring ya. No big deal.”

“Well, thanks for thinking of me! I don’t know how many more times I can go around Lake Waste Water without losing it.” He said gratefully.

Louise got off her bike and grabbed Rudy by the wrist to look at his watch. “Looks like we have about two and a half hours to get you back. What do you want to do?”

“Anything! I’m up for just about anything.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Hey, Louise! Look what I can do!” Rudy called for his friend’s attention from a low branch of the tree they were climbing. When she directed her attention to the boy about 15 feet closer to the ground than her, she saw him shift his weight and fall backward, dangling from the branch by his legs.

“Neat.” She commented, not really that impressed. Dangling was the easy part. “Just don’t crack your head open.”

“I wasn’t planning on it.” He sounded a little less sure of himself now that he didn’t quite know how to pull himself back up. “But everything looks pretty cool upside-down. You should try it!”

“It’s cooler up here, Rudy. You should focus on getting right-side-up again and get up here.”

“Uh, yeah. Okay.” He swung back and forth, trying to gather enough momentum to pull himself back up. Try as he might, however, he couldn’t manage it. “Uhhhh, Louise?”

She let out a groan. “You’re stuck, aren’t you?”

“Maybe a little bit.”

Louise groaned again, this time longer and more frustrated. Partly because he needed help, but mostly because she found herself willing to give it. “Fine. Just hang tight.”

“I’m hanging on as tightly as I can!”

The strain in his voice urged Louise to move faster as she descended down the tree, fearing he would  fall and seriously injure himself. That’s all that kid needed. Thankfully she had climbed enough trees to be sure-footed going down. When she eventually reached the branch he was hanging on, she extended her hand to grab one of his and hoisted him back up.

“Woah, head rush.” he breathed out as he wiggled on the branch to right himself. “Thanks, pal.”

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t get gross on me.” She said, rejecting the idea of a moment too mushy for her liking. It wasn’t much of anything, but she had a badass reputation to protect here! With how sweet she knows Rudy can be, she had to stop it before it started. “Now come on. We gotta get to the top.”

Rudy looked up the trunk of the tree and realized there is quite a far way yet to go. “Uh-well… okay, I guess.” His voice sounded a little unsure.

“Just stick close by. I’ll even slow down for you.” She stuck true to her word, stopping at every branch to wait for him to catch up. She even held in a groan when he needed to take a break for another puff on his inhaler. Slowly and surely, they finally climbed their way to the top.

Rudy pushed back some of the smaller branches in their way. When he caught sight of all that was around them, his mouth dropped open. It wasn’t that marvelous a sight, Louise thought. She could see the expanse of treetops that surrounded them, the lake, The Warf- nothing you couldn’t see from the top of the Ferris Wheel. There weren’t any people on the ground she could get excited to be towering over and mock. Really, all she appreciated was the accomplishment. She knew that Rudy did too, which is what made her so determined to make sure he did it. Her friend deserved more experiences like this. So when she saw the look of joyous wonder on his face, Louise had to turn her head to hide a smile.

They sat there for a while, Rudy excitedly pointing to all the cool things he could see, but eventually, Louise realized it had been a while since they left the train. Quickly, she grabbed Rudy’s wrist again to check the time. “Crap! We need to go now if you are going to make it back in time.”

“Aw, really?”

“Yes, really! You took too long climbing.” She grumbled, already starting to make her way back down.

~*~*~*~*~

“That was fun, but I’m sorry for being such a slowpoke.” Rudy apologized when they made it back to the train tracks.

“Stop being such a push-over, Rudes. It’s not like I was expecting Spiderman anyway.”

He gave a chuckle and shrugged. “I suppose you wouldn’t.”

“It was still a good time,” Louise assured him, nonchalantly. Then she gave him a punch on the arm that was meant to be friendly but wound up being a little too hard. Thankfully, he knew her and where it was coming from. “Maybe next time we can build a fort or something instead.”

“Next time?” The hopefulness to his voice was unmistakable.

“Uh-yeah. Sure. If I am confronted with another boring-ass day, I could make it out again.” Louise took a few extra seconds getting situated on her bike, afraid to see a look of disappointment on his face over her lack of enthusiasm. She couldn’t let herself show that she was honestly excited about the idea of more of these adventures. Not unless she was willing to reveal the fact that she enjoyed her time with more than she did with most people (the only exceptions being her family). When she finally looked at him, however, he looked as pleased as ever.

Her heart melted -just a tiny itsy bit- and she kind of hated him for it. Her hand was twitching to slap him across the face, but she didn’t. Instead, Louise brushed it off as much as she could and turned the conversation toward the train starting to pass.

“Alright, here’s your ride. You think you can grab hold of the ladder?”

Rudy put up his hands and shifted his weight from foot to foot, readying himself. “I got this!” They waited while each compartment passed, and when the Juice Caboose neared, he started to count off. “One, for the money. Two, for the show. Three, to-”’

“RUDY JUST JUMP!” Louise yelled, cutting him off before he missed it.

He did as he was told and leaped with all his might toward the back of the train and landed with an ‘oomf!’ on the small platform. After a short breath of relief, he moved to grab the ladder and climbed it as awkwardly as he had climbed down. But he was alive-at least he was alive. ‘I’d like to see Spiderman do that’

“Yes! You did it!” He heard Louise cheer.

Once he was able to crawl back into the train, he grabbed her backpack and returned to the window so he could roll up the ladder and stuff it back into her bag. He then tossed it out to her, and she brought her bike to a halt to pick it up.

“Thanks for breaking me out! See you at school!” He called out with a wave.

“Yeah, see ya, buddy!” She waved back as watched him ride off ahead of her.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A/N:  I am CONSIDERING making this into a series. But, as always, I can't promise anything.

Anyway, any like, reblogs, or comments are greatly appreciated!!!

#louwheeze #louise belcher #regular-sized rudy #rudy steiblitz #bob's burgers #fanfic #roudise #rouise

[murdersexual]

So... When are you going to post that LeoPika fic? 👀👀👀

Mane bet... 😏 But I might delete it later! Here’s part one!

🚨WARNING!🚨

Rated MA for Mature Audiences only. NSFW.

Sex, Drugs, Alcohol, Gambling, Gun Violence.

NOT COMPLETELY PROOFREAD.

May have a few out of character instances for I wrote this around 3am, so please excuse that.

✨Ship/Pairing✨:

LeoPika (Leorio x Kurapika)

March 3rd, XXXX, En route to World Resorts Casino, around 9:47pm:

The weather in Yorknew hadn’t exactly started to reflect that it’s close to Springtime yet. It’s still cold and snowy but that wasn’t going to stop the event that’s being hosted by some of the biggest names in Underground Crime.

We’re talking about a night full of sex, drugs, alcohol, gambling and music.

It’s also the night of Leorio’s 21st birthday and he’s in town, steaming hot for he’s yet to receive a ‘happy birthday’ call from a certain Mafia Leader with the most gorgeous of light blonde hair. However, that’s not all... In general, Leorio is ultimately tired of trying so hard to be the glue to what’s considered an already unfixable relationship. The point of his visit this time is to give Kurapika a piece of damn mind for what may be the final time.

What a way to spend his birthday, right?

The hot blooded koi fish found himself strolling down the cold streets of Yorknew by his lonesome. His enticing hazel gaze is relative to the weather... Cold and piercing. He wore the meanest of faces with his lips decorated in a sheer pout. Then his face and ears are red from the whipping of the snow and frosty winds. The thoughts that went around his sophisticated skull only ruses him further. With each step he took, the snow crunched beneath his expensive waterproof combat boots. The sound gave him a slight sense of calm—one that managed to steal attention momentarily.

“I forgot the last time I’ve even enjoyed the Winter...”

The words came rolling off his tongue. His eyes slightly softened as he now comes to a brief halt, a soft sigh exhales from the tall doctor-to-be. He finds the dark sky that slowly drops the small white flakes. Being the jovial spirit he knows he could be, he sticks his tongue out and catches a few of them. His handsome features are now graced with a soft smile only to see the lights of his destination illuminate the skyline. With a low growl, he’s reminded of his current goal.

“Bet even YOU won’t see me coming...”

His icy glare returns and the tone of his voice has lost all signs of benevolence. His words came out way darker than they should’ve.

But can you blame him though?

Continuing his traverse through the snowy lands of the busy city, he adjusts his earmuffs while now stuffing his gloved hands back into his long black winter coat. The brunette’s hair is messy and filled with snowflakes, such a look makes him appear rather gentle despite his mood. His trademark circular shades are gently shaded from the current weather but that doesn’t stop him from seeing now does it?

‘When I get there, I promise this time I’m gonna knock his fucking lights out.’

The thought got his adrenaline flowing. Now he yearns to cause physical damage. The question is... will it actually happen? This IS Kurapika here. He’s not gonna sit there and take that shit, UNLESS... he ACTUALLY accepts such a punishment.

Leorio knows how aggressive he can be but he is more angry than sad. He won’t ever come to say it...

But the idea of not being called on his birthday genuinely hurt him.

It felt like a slap in the face, especially for everything he’s done. He’d never miss any birthdays or special occasions and it’s to the point where he feels like it’s only him who thinks that way.

‘I give too fucking much to not get much—better yet, NOTHING in return!’

Being a person with a heart the size of the world this is the curse: to always be dealt a hand that’s never going to win. Knowing him? He wants to break that curse and by default there’s no better way to do it than to throw hands. His actions always spoke louder anyways.

Crossing a few streets and nearly fighting one of the people who almost hit him, he finally makes it to his destination—World Resorts Casino. Entering through the slide open glass doors, the bright slots, signs that point to everything and even the neon-like decor nearly blinded him. The smell of expensive imported cigars, cigarettes, various alcohol and a multitude of different colognes and perfumes filled the air. His nose burned from the mixture of scents all around. A low grunt emits as he now removes his gloves and earmuffs. Stuffing both in his pocket, he proceeds to walk ahead while undoing his silver buckle, his finely seamed gold buttons and his golden zipper. It revealed the finest of outfits!

He’s wearing a sleek black slim fit blazer that fits rather nicely around his muscular arms, a jet black satin button up that’s halfway unbuttoned at the top and neatly tucked in his matching sleek slacks that’s accented with a gold buckle Gucci belt. Tapping his feet to rid of the snow from the bottom, he walks on ahead only to meet one of the Casino Bunnies.

“Welcome to the World Resorts Casino, my fine gentleman! If you’re looking for the event labelled ‘How To Play Russian Roulette With a Criminal Mastermind’, it’s from the second floor on up! Here’s a complimentary welcome drink! May you enjoy your time here~!”

Giving a quick bow, the busty beauty now switches away, her semi-exposed cheeks had a little bit of a wiggle to them much like her makeshift bunny tail. With a smirk as he watches her, he stirs his drink and takes a sip, now charmed by how well it’s mixed.

“Not bad!”

Heading to the stairs that’s decorated in the cutest of roulette wheel numbers, he heads up, his ears are open and listening to the music that’s being played. He hums while trying to figure out what floor Kurapika may be on...

Speaking of him?

Kurapika’s right hand reaches for the roulette wheel, the midnight blue and black ombré nail polish that was still on his hands matched with the blue and purple ambience that is on the 8th floor. In his left, he held a half empty shot glass, now proceeding to spin the wheel. His right leg is crossed over his left, his foot gently swung to the beat, a soft smirk now decorating his face for he’s caught up hosting the Roulette Table.

“What’s your bets?”

He asked the two players, a woman in a black short evening dress that seemed one size too small, her breasts looked as if they were about to pop out of it and her bodacious hips, butt and thighs made the dress rise to the point her black g-string nearly showed. But it’s a good thing she has her legs crossed right?

“I’ll take all even on red, my kind sire~”

Her voice cooed, almost in a flirtatious tone towards him. To be honest, she’s been debating on attempting to charm him since his grand appearance earlier in the night. He knew that just from her gestures and body language alone. Those light grey orbs swished over to the woman beside her, she held herself up, a cigarette now being doused out in an ashtray, she wears a smile on her ruby red lips as she now casually blows smoke into the air.

“Mmm, can luck be a lady tonight~? I think I’ll take all even on black, hun~”

Sipping the little bit of cognac that’s left in his shot glass, he sets it down and looks to the wheel while mentally trying to calculate who’s going to win this round.

“How much?”

The busty lady was quick to answer...

“I’ll put 100 genie on my red~”

The ruby red lipstick lady smirked at her.

“Hmph, I’m a bit of a daredevil, so I’ll do 700 on my black~”

With that being said, he spins the wheel and actually narrows his choice down to who’s going to win.

‘Ruby, otherwise she wouldn’t have bet so much. She’s confident that all black on even will be victorious. And she’s not wrong... Tara’s bet was a safe one so there’s a lack of confidence in her choice. I know I’m the reason why she’s picked red... I have my earring to blame.’

“And the winner is...”

His eyes carefully watched the wheel as it began to slow up. The tiny little ball clicked and clanged until it fell onto...

Black, 26.

“Ruby.”

‘Just as I thought.’

Indeed, he knew it and with a gasp of disbelief, Tara pouts before reaching in between her breasts and pulling out a total of 800 genie. She hands it over to Ruby who takes it and waves it like a fan over her.

“Mmm, I can smell that vanilla perfume with a hint of boob sweat~ You were nervous weren’t you, doll face~?”

Tara gives an eye roll and crosses her arms over her chest.

“Hmph! What’s it to ya? Ya won already!”

She squeaks angrily. Getting up from her chair, Ruby wanders over and stands behind her before leaning down and wrapping her arms around her, she plants a kiss on her cheek before using her alcohol tinged tongue to sensually lick the shell of her ear before nipping at it and tugging on it. She purrs playfully.

“Better behave yourself, kitten~”

A soft squeak emits from Tara who huffs softly. She hates how she plays at one of her many weaknesses.

“Oh fine! But you’re on the couch tonight!”

“As long as my face is between your legs, I’m fine with that.”

The exchange between the two didn’t really surprise the blonde. As a Mafia Leader, he’s come to accept the shit he’s gonna see on a pretty regular basis. Taking his ice cubes and holding them into his cheeks he sets up for the next spin only to receive a call.

“Ugh...”

He knew whose voice it was off the back. He blinks his eyes closed as he slides the answer icon to the right and places it to his ear.

“What...?”

On the other line, that soft voice of Melody’s muttered...

“You have a visitor on his way to you... He seems very pissed...”

But who exactly is SHE referring to?

‘Oh don’t tell me...’

“Who…?”

He was enticed to ask anyways.

“I think it’s Leorio! I-I’m not sure, the only heartbeat I recognise that’s this fast and full of anger is yours though... It doesn’t seem like him at all...”

His eyes found the sky as he worded ‘my dear family, I do apologise, but fuck me gently with a fucking chainsaw, please, speed on low and blades on extra sharp.’ He made Tara and Ruby giggle for they read his lips perfectly. With a gentle sigh, he asks...

“Okay... so is it him or not…? I’m in the middle of hosting the roulette table...”

Her answer would’ve been immediate for she could hear the irritation starting to ruse. But before she could answer, she was spotted by the angry Leorio. His eyes glinted as he knew she was snitching.

“U-Uh!”

“MELODY!! TELL THAT FUCKER I SAID... BE READY TO FUCKING FIGHT!!”

Now leaning to his left hand to pinch his nose bridge a dreaded sigh left Kurapika.

“...Great.”

👀👀👀

I see that you’ve made it this far... This is ONLY part one. I currently have three full parts. So if you’d like to see the rest? Let me know! (EWW I CANNOT WRITE WTF! 🥲) I do apologise if this is all over the place but I knew that I’d get asked to post this some time around!

#hunter x hunter #hxh #hxh 2011 #oneshot #writing #leorio #leorio paladiknight #Kurapika #ask #ask response #anime #hxh imagines #one shot #fanfic #part one #thanks for the ask! #casino

[fuckspn]

Hey! so I'm new to the supernatural fandom and i see people shipping destiel and i mean its canon that cas loves dean but -and this is no hate im just curious- why do people think dean loves him back? sure he cares about cas but love,,,? i'd love to hear your opinion

first of all—and i genuinely don’t mean any disrespect by this—i’m obsessed with the fact that you sent this to me, a blog that’s only seen about half of the tv show supernatural and fewer than half the seasons cas was actually in. so i’m gonna do my best to answer this question, but i haven’t watched a full episode with both of them in it since 2013 (i just started s3 in my rewatch/catchup, and cas isn’t introduced until s4). pretty much any other spn blog could give you a better explanation than me.

here’s a rundown of some of the reasons i know that people think dean loves cas back. the list is skimpy on detail because a) i don’t remember all the specific examples and b) i need to be able to stop writing this post at some point and move on with my life:

low-hanging fruit here, but in the latin american spanish dub, he explicitly does love cas back. so in at least one version of spn, it’s canon.

cas frequently fulfills a narrative role relative to dean that would ordinarily be given to a love interest.

dean’s reactions to the (many) times cas dies or leaves him are way, way, way more intense than his reaction to basically anyone else (except sam) dying or leaving him. we see how dean grieves his friends, and it doesn’t look like (to pick a random example) dean begging god to bring them back and punching a door when god doesn’t answer, in a scene that comes off like an homage to brokeback mountain.

despite being the character who’s supposed to be the “womanizer,” dean displays increasingly little interest in women as the show goes on/as his relationship with cas becomes more narratively prominent.

there are a lot of parallels drawn between them and other romantic couples on the show.

on several occasions, dean claims that he wants to help cas have sex with women, then acts weird and jealous and uncomfortable whenever women actually do display interest in cas.

the show has repeatedly raised the suggestion that dean, despite supposedly being the noncommittal “live fast die young” guy, actually wants a life partner and has been doing some subconscious #yearning. if dean has been directing those thoughts towards any specific person, cas is the only clear candidate.

dean, as someone who has clearly been fucked up, down, and sideways by american toxic masculinity, is not a very touch-y person beyond typical bro hugs with men and sexual contact with women. yet he touches cas pretty frequently and casually, which men like dean generally only do with their romantic partners.

there are a lot of little moments sprinkled throughout the show that come across as dean being attracted to cas. by “a lot,” i mean these are the moments that make up the bulk of those “dean and cas being gay for 30 minutes” youtube compilations.

this isn’t a watsonian reason to think that dean loves cas back, but on a meta level... they just both deserve it? cas deserves to have someone love him, and particularly for his heaven-defying, free-will-inventing, god-overthrowing, gay, romantic love to be requited. dean deserves a life partner, someone who truly loves and knows and understands him on every level and can weather any storm with him. cas, who always felt like the outsider, deserves to have someone actively want him. dean, who always had to fight so hard to keep his family from ripping apart, deserves to have someone stay with him without him having to dig metaphorical claw marks into them to stop them leaving. they deserve to be happy.

#anonymous #ask

[lavendersuh]

Doyoung rebel spy!au

doyoung x reader // sci-fi au, fluff, reluctant mission partners to lovers

word count: 1.5k

au masterlist 

header by @itsapapisongo tysm!!

note: long time no see! here’s the next part of my little star wars nct au series! i’m trying to make these easy to read for people that don’t know star wars, but I’ve been in the fandom for so long i can forget that some of this terminology isn’t general knowledge lol. blasters = space guns and bacta = quick healing med patches

“Are you coming or not?”

You hear your mission partner call from outside the ship. You snarl as you grab a blaster and exit the ship as well. 

“This is a bad idea, Doyoung!” You yell after him as he walks toward the desert town. “We have no idea where we are! How do we know there won’t be any Imperials walking around?”

“Calm down, sweetheart, why would stormtroopers come to such a backwater planet?” Doyoung tells you, casually strolling into the marketplace. 

The stalls are bustling with a variety of species, all seemingly in a hurry to go about their business. You didn’t get a very friendly vibe from anyone, but all you needed was to get a part of repair your ship and be on your way.

While you really didn’t want to be here on this run down planet, it was a necessary stop. You were running out of fuel and some of the hyperdrive parts were completely fried from your last jump. You and Doyoung hadn’t expected to run into so much trouble while gathering information for the Rebel Alliance, but at this point, you suppose everything is trouble. Every mission with Doyoung seemed to end in a chase through the stars, and the two of you had only managed to escape because of one too many jumps into hyperspace. 

The market is fairly mundane, as people and creatures try to sell their food, ores and tech to anyone who crosses their path. As you search for a place selling ship parts, the hair on the back of your neck stands up. You can just tell that trouble is on it’s way.

You look ahead of you to find Doyoung has already engaged with a vendor. He seems to be using his charm to knock the price down, and you can’t help but feel a smile as his usually annoying charisma comes in handy for once.

You didn’t hate Doyoung, no. You both were fighting for the same things, both having been pilots in the Imperial Academy before running away. With your similar backgrounds, the leaders of your rebel cell decided you would work well together. This was both correct and incorrect.

Statistically, you worked best with Doyoung. The missions were quick, to the point, and you got home with important information and relatively few scratches. But you always fought with Doyoung. It was never anything major, but every time, he somehow managed to piss you off and get you riled up. You were just praying you would get off this planet before you blew your cover.

You finally catch up to Doyoung, hearing him talk in a language you don’t know. He seems to be doing okay though, so you look around a bit as he makes the trade. 

Out of the corner of your eye, you spot a speck of white in the midst of the dull browns and greys of the market. Your eyes widen as you see two stormtroopers emerge from a building. 

“Doyoung, we gotta go.” You grab his wrist, startling him in the middle of a sentence. He looks over to where your eyes are trained and you assume he offers the creature a farewell before you take off at a fast pace towards the ship. 

“Where the hell are we? Why are those bucket heads on every goddamn planet?” You snarl, making your way through the crowds of people. 

“Haven’t you noticed we are fighting an Empire that rules the whole galaxy? Of course there are stormtroopers everywhere!” Doyoung calls behind you.

You’re about to argue back to him, but almost trip over a canister in the middle of the road. You weave around a corner, coming closer and closer to the spaceport holding your ship. You thank every star above that the repair you bought parts for can be made while taking off. 

You look behind you to find the troopers hot on your tail, with Doyoung just a few steps behind you. Just as you catch his eye in your glance back, one of the troopers manages to hit his shoulder, causing your partner to cry out. He doesn’t stop running, though, instead catching up to you and making a covert turn so that the troopers are momentarily caught off guard.

The two of you make a few more turns, leading to a completely abandoned alleyway. You don’t have much time but you pause to inspect Doyoung’s injury.

“How bad is your shoulder? We have some bacta patches on the ship, we just have to hurry-”

“It’s not that bad,” Doyoung says, while he holds onto his injury, “But, I need to tell you something important.”

“Important?” you ask, “How important? Because we don’t have a lot of time.” 

You know Doyoung’s injury is worse than he is telling you, and you know he isn’t someone who shows his pain. But there is a fear in his eyes. His skin is paler than it normally is, and he wobbles where he stands.

“Please, listen, I just- I need to tell you somet-” Doyoung never finishes his sentence, as he passes out. You are barely close enough to catch him, but after some jostling, you manage to secure your arms around his torso.

Panic sets in as you hear blaster shots a few roads away. You begin to drag your partner along as fast as you can, seeing the space port entry just a few yards away. It’s certainly not the most graceful thing, but soon enough you are setting Doyoung’s unconscious form in the medbay corner of your ship as you pilot yourself out of the city. 

It doesn’t take long to exit the atmosphere, so you set up auto-pilot and fix the repair that caused this whole mess in the first place. It’s a quick fix, and you are soon traveling through hyperspace. 

Doyoung is still unconscious when you return to him. You find the bacta patches and turn him over gently, removing his shirt and vest to get a better look at the injury. It’s not the worst you’ve ever seen, so you know with the right treatments it will heal in a few days. You press the patches onto his shoulder blade, hearing a seer of pain escape his mouth.

“Are you awake, or do you still wanna pretend like you’re dying?” You ask him, as he tries to sit up.

He coughs for a moment, so you find some water for him as he further wakes up. You stand silently watching the muscles along his neck as he drinks, suddenly reminded of the fact that you tore his shirt in order to apply the bacta. 

You hadn’t thought about it at the time, but now that he’s awake, you start to feel flustered. Doyoung doesn’t seem to notice, though, as his eyes stare off into space somewhat intently.

He seems to notice you staring, as he shakes his head and gives you a small smile, “Thank you for getting me all the way back here.”

“It’s no problem,” you reply, “I apologize for any bruises that might appear due to dragging you.”

He lets out a chuckle, his eyes shining with appreciation. But something is still missing.

“Are you okay?” you ask, a bit hesitant. “Not just the shoulder injury, but in general? You were kinda manic before you passed out on me.”

Doyoung is quiet for a moment. You decide to sit next to him on the med table, equally silent.

“I haven’t gotten shot in a while,” he tells you. “I started panicking because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to tell you….”

“Tell me what?”

“I like you.” 

He says it so softly, you barely hear it. He says it so bluntly, you barely believe it. You turn to look him in the eyes, and you find Doyoung’s face to be at peace, staring with a quiet smile settled upon his lips.

“You like me?” you ask, making sure you heard correctly.

“Yeah, I do.”

You can’t help the way your face scrunches up, “Since when? How? We always fight…”

He runs his hand lightly down your forearm in an affectionate way. “Sure, we have our arguments, but we make a good team.” he tells you, “I like that you always seem to know what I’m thinking before I do.”

“Oh.”

You don’t really know what else to say. Your mission partner who you have reluctantly found yourself getting close to has turned your world upside down. 

Doyoung pulls you out of your thoughts again as he asks, “Can you tell what I’m thinking about right now?” 

Tilting your head, you hate to admit that you can tell. His gaze roams around your face, settling on your mouth. You slowly look to his own. 

His lips twitch up into a bright smile before he softly connects to yours. It’s light and chaste, but your head spins. Suddenly your partner in crime seems like he might be more after all.

#doyoung #doyoung x reader #doyoung x you #nct #nct fanfic #doyoung fluff #kim doyoung #sci fi au #doyoung au #nct scenarios #doyoung scenarios #my writing

[vikingpoteto]

the curse of cousin Chad

Read on AO3

______________________

Relationships:  GEN. Tim Drake & Jason Todd & Stephanie Brown

Summary: Tim Drake's only wish is for people to stop talking about Red Robin on the news (and a monkey's paw finger curls somewhere as Chad Wayne shows up in their lives.)

________________________

Red Robin had been better, but he had been worse too.

After Batgirl helps him sit down, he stops for a second and decides that he probably doesn’t have any broken bones, just more than a few bruises forming. Batgirl all but falls by his side, exhausted, and judging by the groan she lets out she must be just as sore. Still, she extends her fist for a bump and he grins as he obliges.

“Well, no one got shot or stabbed, so that’s a win on my book,” Red Robin says.

“That and we put away a dangerous gang that had been terrorizing the locals for months,” she reminds him.

“Yeah, that too.”

He glances around and decides the building they chose is tall enough that they can relax for a bit. He pulls down his cowl. Tim lets out a long relieved sigh when the cold night air touches his face. Batgirl follows his cue, even if she struggles with her hair for a bit to do so. The two of them let their legs dangle from the edge of the rooftop, unbothered by the height, their gazes on the sky.

Heavy footsteps approach the young vigilantes from behind, but neither Tim nor Steph worries, because they’re familiar with the sound. As expected, a third vigilante soon enough takes the spot by Steph’s other side, his helmet already under his arm and his face mask free.

“You two look really beaten considering you weren’t fighting alone tonight,” Jason says.

Steph flips him off.

Tim rolls his eyes. “There were a lot of weaklings, okay? Sometimes that’s more annoying than one strong guy.”

“If you say so.”

“How about your night?” Steph asks casually.

“Kicked some ass, shot the kneecaps of the most stubborn ones. All in a night’s work.”

They nod and resume watching the sky for a brief peaceful moment. So high above they can barely hear the sounds of sirens and late night traffic on the streets.

Then Steph sits up so fast she almost slips down the edge. Tim and Jason grab her shoulders by reflex and pull her back at the same time.

Ignoring the fact that she almost died, Steph shouts: “What time is it?”

“Hm... about 2am?” Tim checks his wrist pad. “Yeah, 2:35.”

“Oh my God!” She groans, pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes. “We missed the countdown by, like, a lot! How did we not hear the fireworks?”

“Gunshots?” Jason suggests.

“Fireworks and gunshots don’t sound the same, we all know the difference.”

Tim rolls his eyes, because this is so them. Of course they’d miss the start of the new year because they were busy fighting crime. Steph and Tim were even planning on going to WE’s New Year’s party together after what was supposed to be a super quick patrol, just to stop a few muggers, really . Tim is glad they did, even if Lucius is going to scold him on Monday. He hates those parties.

“Well, I have a little something here to celebrate,” Jason says with a crooked grin.

He turns his helmet upside down, revealing a bottle of booze. Of course the dramatic bitch had it hidden, just waiting for the right moment to reveal it. Steph whoops excitedly.

“Jason, you’re my hero! I mean… B is gonna kill us if he finds we were drinking in uniform, but it’s not like he’ll find out, right?”

Jason hands the bottle to Tim first, his smile positively wicked. Having been given this sort of gift from Jason before, Tim rolls his eyes and takes a generous chug without hesitation. His eyes tear up a bit at the taste when he passes the bottle to Steph.

She happily drinks straight from the bottle like Tim had… Then she freezes.

"Jason?"

“Yeah, Steph?”

“What the heck is this?”

“Spinach and lettuce juice. Timmy needs those antibodies."

"Jason, why are you like this?

"You didn’t think I was giving you guys alcohol, did you? You two are minors.”

Tim grins. He can tell Steph is trying to decide whether to throw the bottle overboard or at Jason’s head.

Before she decides, he turns his gaze back to the sky and asks: “You guys made any New Year’s wishes?”

“Resolutions,” Steph corrects. “Wishes are for birthdays.”

Jason makes a high-pitched voice, “wow, look at me, I’m Stephanie Brown, my mom loves me so much she celebrated my birthday!”

Tim laughs. “Geez, I’ll drink to that.”

There are no words to describe the horror in Steph’s face when he takes back the bottle and drinks a little more of the green juice.

He simply shrugs. “It’s an acquired taste.”

Deciding it’s not worth the trouble, Steph shakes her head and says, “I’m keeping it simple this year. My only resolution is to pass all my classes for once in my life. What about you, Jay?”

“I don’t do that corny shit.”

“Then why did you ask?”

“I know you guys like corny shit.”

“We’ve seen you cry over Jane Austen, your edgelord bullcrap doesn’t work on us,” Steph says. When Jason tries to protest that his eyes were just tearing up from yawning, she turns to Tim: “What about you? Any New Year wishes?”

“Just one, too,” Tim says. “I wanna make sure every non-criminal forgets Red Robin ever existed.”

Jason and Steph snort.

“I’m serious. No more shipping me with my family, no more stalkers. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure no reporter writes the words ‘Red Robin’ ever again.”

“Good luck with that, Timbers.”

Tim drinks his lettuce juice in silence. He hands the bottle back to Jason. Steph pretends to gag when he also takes a long sip. Despite their incredulity, Tim is feeling positive about his goal. He feels like after the Red Twins craze died down, people lost interest in him. He thinks he can pull it off.

If only he knew.

Tim almost never visits the manor anymore. He’s been to the Batcave once or twice on the past few months, but the house itself… he doesn’t even remember the last time. He decides to stop by on a rare free afternoon, hoping Duke and Cass will be around. If not, seeing Alfred outside the cave and having a cup of tea with him was more than enough.

He lets himself in, because he knows it makes Alfred begrudgingly happy when any of the kids acts as though they still live there rather than politely ringing the bell. It also makes Damian mad, which is always a plus.

Hearing voices from the living room, Tim heads straight there, excited that there’s someone home. His smile freezes on his face. Whatever he was expecting to see, it wasn’t… that.

Bruce is sitting near the fireplace pinching the bridge of his nose as he does when his children are fighting among themselves. On the opposite couch is none other than Jason being embraced by a complete stranger that is currently sobbing into his shoulder.

Jason’s gaze meet Tim’s in what is clearly a plea for help. All Tim can do is mouth who the hell is that? to which Jason mouths back I have no fucking idea.

“Would you look at that, Tim’s here,” Bruce says. Tim has the feeling he’s trying to save Jason.

The sniffling stranger pulls back and turns around. “Oh god. You’re a man now, Timmy! Last time I saw you, you were just a tiny kid!”

To Tim’s complete horror, the man stands and comes hug him tightly.

“Uh… ”

“Oh gosh, I’m sorry,” the man gives a watery chuckle “of course you don’t remember me. You were a basically a toddler and I was also a kid when I last saw you. I’m Chad, your father’s cousin.”

“Oh. You’re…”

“I mean, Bruce's cousin. I knew Jack, though. He was good people.”

“Bruce’s cousin. Hm. So your name is Chad Wayne, huh?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Nothing,” Tim pretends not to see Jason hide a snicker into his hand. “Sounds… cool.”

“Chad is visiting Gotham for a couple of weeks,” Bruce tells him. “He just graduated from college in Central City and decided it was a good idea to visit old relatives. It was such a great surprise when he arrived.”

“Right,” Chad wipes the tears from his face, “and I happened to run right into Jason here and oof. Saying I was surprised doesn’t cover it.”

His jovial laughter is so genuine that it’s almost unsettling.

“Oh. You… You know Jason."

“Yeah, man. My family was in a year long trip to Africa, so we didn’t hear about his death until a long time had passed. My parents were crushed that they couldn’t be there for Brucie then. Bruce was telling me about how you guys got him back. Nothing short of a miracle, huh?”

“A miracle,” Jason echoes.

Chad scratches his own nape, finally looking appropriately embarrassed. “Sorry I got so emotional, Jason. I almost didn’t recognize you, you got so jacked , man. I guess I have a good memory for faces.”

He speaks so fast. Steph always complains that Tim speaks too fast whenever he is in the zone and caffeinated, but that was nothing compared to Chad’s rambling.

“Oh well. C'mere, Tim, sit with us, let me get to know you guys. Even if I’m your father’s cousin, I guess I’m closer in age to you two ahaha...”

Tim is known for being a quick thinker, but something about Chad’s khaki shorts and how out of place they look in Gotham stuns him into inaction. He lets Chad drag him to the couch and doesn’t say anything else on pure fear that the guy is about to do it to ‘em.

“Actually,” Jason stands, “Tim is here to pick me up. We have this, hm, doctor’s appointment. To check my… eyes. Yeah, my eyes. Tim’s gonna drive me.”

“Oh, that’s alright, we can talk more when you two come back.”

“Back?” Tim parrots.

“Actually, Chad, Jason and Tim don’t live in the manor,” Bruce says. “They share an apartment around downtown.”

For the first time, Chad drops his too-blessed-to-be-stressed smile and frowns. “What? Why? I thought you guys just got Jason back. Shouldn’t he stay with you, Bruce?”

“Actually, that’s a funny story,” Jason says, taking Tim by the arm. “I’m sure Bruce will love to tell you all about it. I can’t be late for my appointment, isn’t that right, lil' bro?”

“Uh… Yeah. Being dead made his insurance skyrocket and the cancelation fees are a nightmare.”

“Hm-hum, all that. See you around and stuff.” Jason is holding Tim’s arm with such force that it’ll bruise for sure. They’re still on the way to the door when he hisses: “ Get me out of here right now.”

“But I didn’t even see Alfred,” he whispers back.

“ Now, Timothy ! ”

They don’t stop powerwalking until they’re in the car. Jason doesn’t bother going back for his bike and Tim makes a mental note to ask Cass to bring it back to their place later.

For a second, they just breathe Gotham’s polluted air to remind themselves they’re still home and not in a Disney sitcom.

That’s when Jason starts ranting. Apparently he was on the way to the kitchen to get just a bowl of cereal when he walked into Alfred getting the door open for cousin Chad. Alfred had said "Master Jason, I didn’t know you were here" and cousin Chad recognized him and started losing it. Bruce didn’t let Jason kill him, unfortunately, but managed to pull a story out of his ass about Jason coming back from the dead after someone from the Justice League messed up the timeline or something like that. The official story is that they found Jason just a couple of weeks ago and are still working out the kinks of having a family member return from the grave. Except Jason’s speech was a lot more convoluted and involved a lot of curse words and shakespearean insults.

“...and I didn’t even get my freaking cereal!” he finishes, just as Tim parks in front of their home.

“Well. That was an afternoon you just had,” Tim says. Jason huffs and gruffs on the way to the elevator. Tim waits until the doors close to say: “Bruce didn’t pull that story out of his ass, by the way.”

Jason frowns. “What?”

“Your cover story,” Tim clarifies. “He had it for years. I know everything about it if you want the details. He asked me for feedback when he was figuring how to make it believable and whatnot.”

“What? When? Why?”

“As soon as we found out you were alive. He wanted to be ready in case you decided to officially join the family again. It took a few days of work, but the plan exists and is ready to go whenever.”

Jason doesn’t say anything. Tim had expected that, so he allows him to mull over the newfound knowledge. He also expects Jason to head straight for the kitchen, which he does, and Tim follows his brother closely, not commenting on the tension of his shoulders or the way his jaw is set tight enough to crack a few teeth.

When his brother just stands near the sink apparently unsure of what to do with himself, Tim gets milk from the fridge and starts preparing a bowl of cereal.

“What were you doing there, anyway?”

“I went to see Alfred,” Jason mumbles. “But he was busy, so I was… I was talking to Bruce for a bit.”

“Oh?”

Jason grabs the bowl Tim is offering him. “Shut up.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Shut up.” And Jason stomps his way to his room, slamming the door after him.

When Steph shows up after class, Tim tells her not to bother him.

WAYNE FAMILY

Tim: @Bruce so wats his deal

Bruce: Dear Tim, what do you mean by that? sincerely, Bruce Wayne.

Tim: chad

Tim: whats his night persona

Tim: his masked name

Bruce: Tim, Chad is not a vigilante. sincerely, Bruce Wayne

Dick: shoot

Dick: he’s a villain???

Bruce: Dear Dick, Chad is not a villain either. He’s just a civillian. sincerely, Bruce Wayne.

Duke: dont he want to avenge his parents?

Bruce: Dear Duke, His parents are alive and well. They’re international activists currently on a mission to feed the poor somewhere in South America. sincerely, Bruce Wayne.

Damian: That means he’s must be a sleeper agent of sorts. I’ll collect some of his DNA for examination. Drake, I trust you’ll do a thorough check on his background, official and otherwise.

Tim: on it

Bruce: Damian, if you get your second-cousin’s DNA to run tests, your weekend at the Kent farm is permanently cancelled.

Jason: so b you admit you text like it’s a business email just to fuck with us, huh?

Bruce: Dear Jason, Mind your language in front of your little brothers. Sometimes I’ll sacrifice the format for the sake of speed. Regardless, this is the ideal way of writing a text message. sincerely, Bruce Wayne.

Bruce: @everyone Chad will be staying with us for a few weeks. He’s just a regular civilian with no tragic backstory, no metapowers and no secret identity. I expect all of you to behave like Alfred taught you and hide your secret identities like I trained you to. No one will investigate him or do anything to compromise our identities. Is that clear? Awaiting confirmation, Bruce Wayne

Cass: weird

Bruce: Dearest Cass, It’s not weird. Civilians exist. Sincerely, Bruce Wayne

Tim: not in our family they dnt!!!

Tim: cmon b you cant tell me s not suspicious!!!!!

Bruce: It is not.

Alfred: Master Bruce already checked his DNA for metagenes and ran a thorough background check with the help of miss Barbara. Unfortunately, Master Chad is clear.

Cass: weeeeeiiiiird

Tim decides to avoid Wayne manor for the foreseeable future. Instead, he buys Alfred’s favorite brand of tea and wonders if he can convince the butler to come over to stay with them for an afternoon or perhaps the whole weekend. Tim is more than willing to share the couch with Steph and let Alfred have his bed. He puts the tea away with a passive aggressive note letting Jason and Steph know that tea is to be saved for Alfred.

Jason is in the living room cleaning one of his guns while Steph does her homework on the carpet by his feet, meaning is just an afternoon like any other for them.

Tim has to remind himself of her resolution before he gives in the temptation of asking her to go patrolling with him. The thing is that his resolution is a lot easier to pursue when Batgirl is around, because she can deal with the civilians after the fact while Red Robin vanishes as soon as the criminals are in cuffs.

Alas. Working alone can be fun, too, he tells himself.

Before he heads out to get his suit, however, the buzzer sounds. He hears Steph cheering and saying something about pizza.

Then a voice that makes Tim freeze in horror.

“Oh, hey. I must have the wrong apartment. Is this Tim and Jason Wayne’s place?”

“Uhhhh…”

He runs so fast Bart would be proud, hoping he can sign at Steph to send him away before he sees them, but it’s too late. Tim rushes only to find out that, in all the glory of his khaki shorts and boat shoes, Chad Wayne is already inside his apartment.

Tim is very aware that Jason is frozen on the couch right behind him, still holding a gun.

“Chad! What a surprise!”

“Hey, Timbo!” Chad grins, looking genuinely happy to see him. “Damian told me you wouldn’t be working tonight and then he gave me your address!”

Why, god? Why hadn’t Tim killed Damian when he had the chance?

“And who is this lovely young woman?” He asks. “If she isn’t spoken for, I might want to steal her for me.”

“I’m his ex, actually, and I sort of live here.” Steph offers her hand. “I speak for myself.”

Instead of shaking her hand, Chad brings her fingers to his lips and gives them an excuse of a kiss. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, ma damme .”

Steph’s smile is too wide to be natural and her eyes look like they’re about to jump out of the sockets. Like the rest of the family, she seems to struggle to believe this guy is real. Tim can’t save her, he just wishes Jason would put away his things while cousin Chad is busy with Steph.

“So, Chad, it’s so nice to see you, but uhhh... What are you doing here?”

“Well, since you guys never go over I had to come see you! And trust me, I get it , when I let my folks’ place to go to college, I wanted to spend even the breaks at my frat house. Anyway, I thought I’d come here, we can order some take out and…”

His eyes finally find Jason and he freezes. “...is that a gun?”

Crap, poop, turd, crap,  crapcrapcrapcrap-

“Uhhh… yeah?”

In the same way when he heard that Jason doesn’t live with Bruce, Chad’s positive vibes vanish and he looks distraught.

“Guys… does Bruce know about that?”

Before anyone can stop him, Chad walks in like he owns the place and takes the seat by Jason’s side. Tim and Steph exchange a panicked look, both praying that the gun isn’t easy to assemble or at least that Jason doesn’t have any ammo within arms reach. The two hurry to join them, Steph dropping on the couch and casually leaning against Jason in a position that allows her to hold his arm should he decide to throw Chad out. Tim takes the arm of the couch closer to Chad, ready to pick him up and throw him away himself if he says something stupid.

“We keep it here for safety,” Jason says simply.

“Okay. Oof.” Chad reaches for Jason’s shoulder. “Look, I get it. Gotham is dangerous. But having a gun at home is more of a hazard than anything else, Jace. Can I call you Jace?”

“No.”

“Look, I’m an only son, but if I had a little brother like Tim, I’d want to show him a good example, you know? And guns are not the solution. Do you genuinely think you could shoot someone? I don’t think so. I served the army and there we learn that shooting a person is harder than you can imagine."

Tim can see Steph discreetly pinching Jason’s thigh to keep him in check. Jason looks like he’s asking himself if he’s in the Twilight zone.

There is a beat of silence and Jason opens his mouth. Tim braces himself. Before disaster hits, Steph blurts:

“Actually, that’s why Jason’s here.”

Fortunately, Chad doesn’t notice Jason’s and Tim’s perplexed faces because he’s focused on Steph again.

“Of course Bruce hates guns with his parents and all that,” she frowns sympathetically. “But… Chad, Jason died. Of course he’s getting therapy, but he still needs something to feel safe at least at home. Isn’t that right, Jay?”

She gently rubs his arm. Jason knows Steph enough to recognize the play along or you’re dead in her falsely upset expression.

“Uh… Right. That. I moved in with Tim because, uh, I know Bruce is weird with guns." Another pinch to his thigh. Clearly in a begrudging voice, he adds: "And I super agree with him. I mean, what if Damian found it?”

“God, no,” Tim deadpans. “I don’t want to even imagine Damian with a gun.”

“But Tim and he knows he's not to mess with it,” Jason adds.

“Bruce told me you’re here you and him are a bit at odds, but he didn’t tell me you fought over you having a gun.”

“Bruce doesn’t know and you can’t tell him,” Tim cuts in. Batman is definitely going to forget his no-killing rule if he finds out they let cousin Chad see Red Hood’s gun. “Please, Chad. I promise you we’re careful. We’re just trying to make the best out of a difficult situation.”

Tim hopes the mention that this is a touchy subject will deter Chad. He forgets to take in consideration that Chad thinks they’re his family despite him knowing literally nothing about them. He is under the very wrong impression that he's allowed to talk to them about personal shit. Which is great. This is just great.

“If it makes you feel better, this is temporary,” Jason says. “I talked to my, uh, my therapist about it and he cleared me to have the gun. When I start, you know, getting over the death trauma, I’ll get rid of it.”

“Right,” Steph nods eagerly. “We’re planning on throwing a party when we reach that point and everything.”

The three of them wait with baited breath as Chad considers their excuses, his expression somber. Then Chad opens his arms and pulls Tim and Jason into a triple hug.

“I get it,” he says in a hoarse voice he probably finds cool. “You do what you have to do to cope, man. Bruce told me you’re brave and I can see that’s true. And you, ” he squeezes Tim, “I heard from Dickie that you’re a little prodigy, but I’m so proud of you for being there for your brother!”

God, he has so many feelings. Tim promises himself he’ll never complain about Dick being clingy again. Dick has a Batman level of emotional constipation if compared to this guy.

“Right,” Jason pulls himself free from the hug. “I’m gonna put this away, alright?”

He gathers his cleaning supplies and the spare parts spread across the coffee table and takes it to his room. His expression says he's still trying to figure out what that was.

“But, Timbo…”

“Just Tim is fine.”

“I thought you didn’t know Jason before his death? Bruce adopted you kind of recently, didn’t he?”

“Uhhh… I don’t know what to tell you. Jason and I hit it off and became friends fast,” Tim says. “I mean, at first he hated me enough to want to slit my throat…”

“Wow, alright,” Jason interrupts as he returns, a pout on his lips. “I see we’re very comfortable joking about my early… grumpiness. It’s not something I feel guilt or still have nightmares about at all”

Tim almost snorts at that. “Like I was saying, we got better.”

Chad nods thoughtfully and leans back to be more comfortable, nothing about his body language suggesting he might be getting ready to leave.

“So!” Steph claps her hands together. “Thank you for understanding, Chad. Now maybe let's talk about something lighter, shall we?”

And that’s what they do, with some sttrugle. At first, Chad seems too upset to talk about anything and Steph has to use all of her charm to get him to forget about the fantastic start of his visit. Jason helps by making sarcastic remarks that almost sound genuine and Tim… Tim can’t do much.

He texts Cass and she agrees to take his patrol duty for the night. Tim considered making up an emergency at WE and going out anyway, but in the end he decided that was unfair to the others.

He also sends a message chewing on Damian for sending Chad his way without a warning. No one ever visits Tim’s apartment other than his family and his hero friends, so they could have been in full uniform in the middle of the living room. Damian responds with a dismissive text filled with words that Tim doesn’t know. Tim threatens to break all of his crayons and puts his phone away

By this point, Chad is a bit more like himself again and Tim almost wishes he stayed distressed, because the rest of the night is painfully weird. To avoid more awkward conversation, Jason puts on a random horror movie for them. Chad comments on how impressive it is that none of them seems to mind the gore. He squeals and groans and gives Steph a horrified look when she simply keeps eating her pepperoni pizza as though nothing of note is happening on the screen.

The thing is that the movie’s gore is decidedly inaccurate to the point that they barely recognize it for what it's supposed to be. Besides it’s nothing worse than some wounds they’d either suffered or seen as vigilantes.

Maybe it’s because Tim didn’t get the adrenaline he expected from patrol, but he ends up falling asleep on Jason’s shoulder during the climax of the second movie.

He wakes up alone on the couch with a blanket half-thrown over his legs. It's still the middle of the night and he has half a mind to go to his room before he hears muffled voices from the kitchen. Rubbing his eyes, he follows the sound without thinking much.

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Steph greets him.

She and Jason apparently are building a castle of Uno cards in the middle of the kitchen table.

Tim joins them. “It’s 3am.”

“Witching hour,” Jason mumbles.

Steph gestures at the castle and offers Tim a card. He takes it.

“It was a dirty trick to fall asleep like that,” she tells him. “You missed the selfie party to celebrate the first time he visited Jace and Timbo.”

Tim groans. “He stayed long?”

“Too long.” Jason adds another pair of cards to the castle. “I think I have a headache and the Lazarus pit is supposed to make you immune to headaches.”

“That's what I was telling Jason before you got here, Tim. We’re socially capable, right?”

“Hmmm… Right, I guess.”

“How come we couldn’t get rid of him? Why were we so lost while we were, like, just hanging out with him? Is everyone outside of Gotham like that?”

Part of Tim is relieved that Steph hates Chad too. He thought he and Jason had finally caught Batman’s moodiness, but Steph is one of the most cheerful people he knows and her dry sense of humor and quick quips are a lot more bearable than cousin Chad’s peppy attitude.

The other part of him…

“I think it’s less about him not being from Gotham and more about him being a civilian,” Jason says.

The castle falls. None of them reacts.

“That can’t be right,” Steph says. “We have civilian friends and they’re not like that.”

“Do we?”

“Yeah! Jason-- Hm. Tim has Tam… Oh, forget it, she’s not talking to him again. I have Francisco and- I just remembered he’s the son of a gangster.” Steph pauses. “Huh. Do we seriously not know any civilians?”

They don’t. Not on a friendly level, at least.

Tim had considered that before, but he didn't want to think about it. It was weird he was so distant from a normal life that he felt unsettled by it. Not bad. Just weird. If he hadn’t found out Batman’s and Robin’s identities, would he grow up to be a Chad? Finishing high school, living in a frat house in college, and all that? Would he still be a Drake, neighbor to the Waynes?

He loves all of his siblings and Bruce and Alfred and he doesn’t want to consider a life without them.

However.

In a world without Batman. Bruce would still be a good man. He still wouldn’t hesitate in adopting an orphaned circus boy. He would probably also adopt the little shit that tried to steal his not-batmobile tires. If by a miracle he also adopted the boy next door that tragically lost his parents and a girl from a very broken family and a young boy whose parents couldn’t be there for him anymore. His gremlin of a biological son would have grown up beloved and incapable of harming anyone, let alone assassinating a person.

He remembers the plan to bring Jason back to the world of the living and how easy it had been for him and Bruce to put it together and make it seem believable, because in their world it was believable and it could have been the truth.

If Jason Wayne, a regular boy, son of a regular man, had been killed in a freak criminal act and brought back to life thanks to superhero shenanigans, all of them would have been there for him. Jason wouldn’t resent his father for not killing his murderers, because that wasn’t a possibility, and they’d find a way to get him to overcome the effects of the trauma. Bruce certainly wouldn’t spare effort or money to get his son back to full health.

If Stephanie’s father hadn’t been a super criminal, Tim’s first girlfriend wouldn’t hit him in the face with a brick on their first meeting. She would have been a normal girl with a normal life and she could even run into him at school. There is no doubt in his mind that he would have found and made Steph his friend no matter the universe, except… would he?

In that reality, he didn’t know what gore looked like. He would get too upset to function for half an hour at the mere sight of a gun. He’d visit relatives unannounced and the worst thing that could happen was to find them heading out as he arrives. He draws the line at the khakis and boat shoes, because he doesn’t think he’d wear those in any universe, but still.

That would not be Timothy Drake-Wayne. Tim had seen his own internal organs before. Tim’s not only unfazed by fire guns but also built some for his older brother. Tim is fully aware that visiting any of his siblings might mean walking into a ninja fight at worst and finding them pretending to drive the batmobile at best.

Steph and Jason don’t say anything for a while and Tim could easily blame it on the fact that it’s almost 4am and they have yet to sleep, but he knows it’s because they’re reaching the same conclusion he did: they’re not normal people. They always knew that, but knowing something and seeing evidence are two different things.

And again… it’s not bad. It’s not that Tim wouldn’t change anything about the past, it’s just that he doesn’t regret the life he lead up until this point.

It’s still weird. Too weird.

BABS

Babs: The red dynamic duo ship is back with a vengeance, huh?

Babs sent you a link.

Tim had never had a panic attack. Considering the life he leads, that’s a pretty surprising thing. However, that text from a woman he considers part of his family kicks his fight-or-flight instinct like nothing in the world could. He clicks on it. He reads the article.

He screams into a pillow for about ten minutes.

Jason and Steph find him lying face down on the floor trying to get his phone’s AI to buy him a ticket to Smallville. He's sure Conner will take him in. He’ll work at the farm. He’ll stop being Red Robin. He doesn’t care.

It’s an article from a teen magazine.

TIM WAYNE AND MYSTERY MAN?

Ah, the Wayne Family. Our favorite and most iconic family of Gotham. Timothy Drake-Wayne (18), or Tim, how he prefers to be called, has been under our radar for quite a while and not just because of his cute face. The young CEO of Wayne Enterprises and heir to Drake Industries is smart, rich and incredibly charming if the rumors are true. That being said, the question we’re all asking is: how is this boy still single?

Little to nothing is known about Tim Wayne’s love life and we were all crazy to know if he is in the market for a girlfriend.

Well, ladies, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Tim Wayne might have a special someone. Nothing is confirmed yet, but Chad Wayne (26), Tim’s adoptive father’s cousin, shared a rather interesting picture on his snapchat.

[IMAGE]

Once we got over how freaking hot Chad is looking, we noticed something in the background. Right behind Chad, we can barely see someone that looks exactly like Tim Wayne fast asleep on the shoulder of a real heartthrob. Our suspicions were confirmed by Chad’s caption that said “visiting the little cousins”!

It’s a well-known fact that Tim Wayne is openly bisexual, so could this be his boyfriend? Or are they just dudes being bros, unbothered by toxic masculinity? Only time will tell.

THE BIRDNEST

spoiler alert sent a screenshot.

spoiler alert: lmao

WonderWing: … ok first I thought it was funny but now I’m concerned

WonderWing: do I need to talk to them?

WonderWing: do I need to talk our dad???

In the hood: WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO US?

In the hood: WHY IS ANYONE SEEN NEAR THIS DAMN KID AUTOMATICALLY HIS SIGNIFICANT OTHER??

send me a Signal: scratch that what is this openly bisexual business?

send me a Signal: I mean we know hes bi but hes not that vocal bout it?

spoiler alert: lmao tell em dick

WonderWing: lololol when he was like 12 there were rumors that Jack Drake’s son was gay right?

WonderWing: high society trashy gossip

WonderWing: around the same time his mom thought it was a good idea to let him be interviewed for this random magazine

WonderWing: they mentioned the rumors prolly because they wanted him to like say something motivational about bullying or wtv

send me a Signal: i think i know where this is going

send me a Signal: what did he say?

spoiler alert: i like my men how i like my women

send me a Signal: of course he did

spoiler alert: yeah and he wasnt out to his parnts yet so that part is less fun

send me a Signal: oof

In the hood: are you kidding me? Tim came out to the whole world because he couldn’t stop himself from making a dumb bi joke? Why can’t he stay in the closet like the rest of us?

Boss A$$ Bat: Bi rights

WonderWing: steph did you change cass nickname again

spoiler alert: ye

Boss A$$ Bat: I like it (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

send me a Signal: wait tims too quiet where is he

in the Hood: Steph took away his phone because he kept trying to book a flight to Smallville to become a farmer.

send me a Signal: of course. why wouldnt he.

Chad apologizes profusely for not noticing Tim and Jason were on that shot, but thankfully he does it over the phone so Tim can hang up halfway through his heartfelt apology.

The kids that still live in the manor aren't so lucky.

Tim gets a stream of facetimes from Duke, Cass and even Damian. Apparently Chad won't stop asking Cass to speak up, because she can, why bother with this weird sign stuff? (Cass stops Duke from hitting him.) He insists on asking Damian to play football with him until Damian knocked him out with a ball to the face. Bruce forced Damian to pretend he dislocated his shoulder on the stunt to prevent further invitations. Even though Duke is, by all means, perfect, Chad keeps stalking him and asking about his opinions on his siblings and if he thinks Bruce is doing the best job on raising them. The answers never satisfy him and he keeps asking as though he thinks the boy will change his mind if caught by surprise. Duke starts using his powers to jump out of the window whenever Chad is about to walk into the room until he lands on Alfred's roses. The fact that the butler isn't mad, just disappointed causes Duke to stop his daring escapes.

Bruce, despite his cool facade, isn't much better. He now has to keep his public persona at home too and, when it isn't driving him insane, he is being annoyed by his children exchanging weird looks and holding back giggles while he plays the himbo part.

Long story short, Chad is making a few days feel like torturing years.

The breaking point is the day Tim walks into his living room only to find Steph and Damian sitting on the couch facing each other while she dutifully paints his nails black.

“What is happening?” Tim asks. “Did I fall into a parallel Earth?”

“Tt, do not concern yourself with us, Drake. I’m here for Brown, not for you.”

Steph smirks at him.

“What the- Okay, first of all this apartment is mine and Jason’s. Steph doesn’t live here. Sometimes. Second… Since when do you get along with Steph?”

“I tolerate her.”

“What the hell? That’s like I love you in Gremlin language! Since when did you get Damian?”

Her smirk widens and Tim more or less expects her to do a little victory dance. “I don’t know what to tell you, man. I’m just irresistible.”

“Hm.” Tim turns to Damian. “Chad drove you out of the house and Bruce didn’t let you go to Dick's place in Bludhaven, right?”

“Father says I cannot miss school.”

“Great. If you’re going to become our second unofficial roommate, please stay away from Jason’s pots. He says he has a system and he's a nightmare when we mess with them.”

“I would never spend more time than necessary in your disgusting nest.”

“You’re literally on my couch! Letting my best friend paint your nails! You freaking pest!”

And Damian isn’t the only one.

Cass used to come over regularly, but the frequency of her visits increases dramatically now that Chad is staying at the manor. She isn’t bad to be around, though, as she mostly keeps training in the basement or napping on the couch that Steph is more than happy to share with her. When Tim asks why she doesn’t simply stay in the Batcave, Cass tells him Bruce is keeping their time at the cave to a minimum because Chad noticed sometimes they vanish even if all cars were in the garage.

Chad is also painfully public. He’s constantly tweeting and updating his Instagram and making sure everyone and their mother knows what he’s doing, who’s with him and where they are. That makes it difficult to kick him out without drawing attention. Gotham's elite is a nest of gossip and intrigue and people ought to ask uncomfortable questions if a rich guy sends a rich relative away for seemingly no reason. Bruce might be the most private person in the world, but Brucie Wayne is supposed to be a fun-loving man.

Cass convinces Tim not to make much fun of Bruce, because apparently, after Chad posted a picture of him and Bruce trying to bake and Brucie is wearing an apron that says “Kiss the Bat!”, Superman himself called him only to laugh for ten minutes. Tim Supposes that’s punishment enough.

When Duke is the one seeking shelter, it isn’t as fun. As much as Tim likes the guy, he’s a chronic worrier in a completely different way of Tim. He wants to make sure they're all living healthy lives and eating properly and, for some reason, whether Steph and Jason are bullying Tim. He question things such as the fact that Steph is ruining her back on the couch, Tim’s habit of leaving dirty dishes in the sink overnight and the lack of the right brands of food, whatever that means. Tim gets tired of it pretty fast, but he also finds that being unnecessarilly dark is a efficient way to get Duke to shut up.

“So Steph basically moved in, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you guys share the rent or…?”

“I own the building, Duke.”

“Right. So she doesn’t pay any bills.”

“She kills bugs for us sometimes. She buys candy, too.”

"Does Jason pay bills?"

"He does. We split it evenly between the two of us."

"Huh. Where does he get any money?"

"Don't know. Don't care."

"Is Bruce okay with that?"

"If Bruce wanted to have a say in my life he shouldn't have died and forced me to get emancipated."

"... Tim, I love you so much, man, but sometimes it's hard to be your brother."

"I know, Duke. I love you too, Duke."

One night, he comes back from patrol and he finds all of his siblings literally camping in the living room. Someone even built a pillow fort by tying a preposterous amount of blankets to the porch door and the TV stand. Too tired to care, Tim turns to his room.

“Good night, Jay. Good night, Steph. Good night, parasites that do not live here.”

“You take back those words on this instant, Drake,” Damian hisses, but fortunately someone (Steph) tucked him too tightly into his sleeping bag, so there’s nothing he can do but wiggle around like an angry worm.

“Why are we parasites?” Duke asks from his air mattress. “I’ve done the dishes. That’s more than what Steph does.”

“Good night, Tim,” Cass says from… somewhere. They know she found a place to sleep. They don’t know where it is.

DAD

Tim: brus pls get rid of him

Dad: I can’t, Tim, it’d be suspicious to kick out a relative for no reason.

Tim: every1 is living at my place bc of him

Tim: even damian

Tim: do u kno how insuferable a man has to be that damian would rather spend time with jason and i

Dad: If everyone being at your place is bothering you so much, why don’t you invite Chad?

Tim: … no. ur not pushing him to me.

Dad: Chad and you are close in age, aren’t you? You could get along if you tried.

Tim: i 19! he 26!

Dad: Jason is 22 and he’s your best friend.

Tim: conner is my best friend

Tim: jason is a partner in crime at best

Dad: If you’re able to think of something to shorten Chad’s visit, I’m all ears. I admit it’s inconvenient to have him here. Otherwise, I think spending time with your siblings will do you some good.

Tim: i hate you

Dad: Alright, Tim.

Tim: … ok that was a lie and im sorry i love u bruss

Dad: I love you too, Tim.

One day, Tim goes to the kitchen for a mug of coffee and finds Barbara comfortably working on her laptop.

“...you don’t even live at the manor.”

“Hm? Oh, I’m not avoiding cousin Chad, Steph just invited me over for waffles.”

Tim just takes his coffee and leaves without saying anything else.

And then shit finally hits the fan.

Because Tim isn’t an idiot like Bruce, he didn’t make his public persona something that would be painful for him to play. As far as Gotham’s society knows, Tim Drake-Wayne is a calm and collected young man, work-driven and not too ill-mannered for a rich boy, which isn’t as different from the real Tim. Real Tim is an overworked ball of anxiety that appears to be a calm and collected young man, so no one is surprised when he doesn’t acknowledge the rumors about him and the mysterious man.

At least not until a son of a bitch with too much free time decides to ruin his brother’s life on twitter.

@earthnotflatffs101 yo don’t this dude with tim drake low key look like jason todd?

And the motherfucker even dared to repost Chad’s selfie and an old picture of a 13 year-old Jason walking alongside Bruce.

Of course the tweet goes viral.

Everyone starts talking about the eerie resemblance between Tim’s buddy and his deceased brother that he supposedly never met. Some find it tasteless that everyone is making a conspiracy theory out of an allegedly dead child, but they are quickly overpowered by the wave of old gossip being revisited. It takes one Sunday afternoon for everyone to start pointing out how weird it is that Tim Drake left the Wayne manor seemingly out of the blue and started living by himself at such a young age and how my sense it’d make for him to share a place with a brother. They notice Chad captioned the picture as "visiting the cousins" plural even if it's public knowledge that Tim Drake- Wayne lives alone. People start demanding to know who is the mystery man lending his shoulder to Tim, tagging the few Waynes with known social media in their posts and even WE corporate account.

It’s the very definition of a shit show, in Tim’s humble opinion.

Red Robin and Batgirl skip their Sunday patrol to brainstorm ideas of damage control. Damian is pacing around the kitchen as the two of them desperately try to apply an algorithm Oracle made to make sure less people will see posts about Jason Todd. There’s not a lot they can do about the fact that #IsJasonToddAlive? is trending. They’re so distressed that Damian forgets to be unpleasant.

“I see no other option,” Damian says at some point. “We should kill that man before he ruins our family any further.”

“How would killing him solve anything?” Tim groans.

“It would make me feel better.”

“No.”

“His death would cause people to forget about Todd.”

“... Go on.”

“Tim, you’re not going to let Dami kill Chad.”

“Why not!”

“Because with our track record he’s going to come back with radioactive powers or some shit.”

“That would be good! He’d finally fit in with the family! As it is now, we’re becoming the freaking Kardashians with a hint conspiracy theory, Steph!”

That’s not the biggest problem, though.

The problem is that Jason doesn’t come home on that night.

Tim and Steph wait for hours after Damian finally calms down in his sleeping bag, but the sun rises and Jason’s room remains empty.

He isn’t freaking out, by any means. Jason is an adult man and he can handle himself. He used to go missing by months at a time before moving in with Tim. He must be busy doing Red Hood stuff. He could let them know he’s okay, just for shits and giggles, but it’s alright. He doesn’t owe them anything.

On the third day after #isJasonToddAlive went viral, Tim and Steph go on patrol even if it’s not their turn. It’s a spur of the moment thing, because they’re home and bored. They agree to split up and just ride around town aimlessly, see what happens and meet at the end of the night to grab waffles at that 24 hour diner Steph likes so much.  One that Jason first took her to after one particular bad night in which she failed to stop a mugger from shooting their victim.

He is just riding his bike, not paying attention to where the wheels take him. It’s just a coincidence that he ends up in Red Hood’s old territory. He hears from some loiterers that Batgirl had been seen roaming around just south from where he is. He keeps his patrol focused on the north side.

A beeping sound informs him that someone is trying to contact him. He accepts it almost right away.

“ Jason ?”

“Nope, it’s me, Timmy,” Dick’s voice answers.

He sighs. And cringes when he realizes he broke the no-real-names-when-in-uniform rule. He’s lucky it isn’t Batman calling him. “Sorry, Nightwing, I thought… Never mind. You need something?”

“No, it’s just that I just got here at the manor. I thought I’d let you know.”

“Oh. Is everything okay? I didn’t even know you were coming back.”

“Well, with this whole Jason is alive thing blowing up I thought I’d come home, help in any way I can. Reporters are driving B insane.”

“Ugh.”

“Yeah. Also… Do you know Jason’s here?”

There is a beat. Tim presses the breaks with too much force and it’s a miracle that his bike doesn’t simply throw him away with how fast he stops.

“ What? ”

Dick chuckles over the comm. “I figured he didn’t tell you. Do what you want with this information. I’m gonna help Alfred now.”

Tim doesn’t bother saying goodbye, but he’s sure Dick will forgive him. He’s already pressing the buttons on his wrist pad to contact someone else. “Batgirl? Meet me at the cave. Now.”

It takes a lot of effort to stop Steph from storming into the manor through the main entrance in full Batgirl gear. And it’s a good thing Tim managed it, because there is a literal swarm of reporters in front of the gates and Tim wonders if anything happened in the short two hours he was out patrolling.

Once they’re in the cave, they’re careful enough to change into civies. Unlike Tim, Steph doesn’t have clothes stashed there so she simply steals a sweater from Damian’s locker while Tim checks the news.

“Someone saw the mystery man that looks like Jason Todd getting into Bruce Wayne’s car two days ago, ” he tells her when she comes out of the changing room. “How did we miss that?”

“I don’t know, you’re the tech dude,” she groans. “Maybe we hid so much crap the computer started hiding it from us too.”

It’s an explanation as good as any other and the truth is unimportant now. They climb out of the cave with unusual care, checking twice to make sure no one is around to see them emerge from the secret passage. As soon as the cave entrance is hidden, they hear altered voices.

Steph reaches for Tim’s hand when they walk towards the commotion and intertwines their fingers. One could think the gesture was a request for comfort. Tim had been friends with her long enough that it was a silent plea to hold her back if she needs to fight the urge to dropkick someone.

“... can’t simply hide him forever, Brucie!” They hear Chad saying.

Then, in a deep voice that isn’t quite Bruce or quite Batman, but that is still firm and definitive:

“If you can’t agree with me, feel free to leave. But stay aware that if you do anything to expose my son to unnecessary attention, I will not take it lightly.”

They walk into the room to find a Chad that looks somewhere between mildly horrified and extremely angry. Bruce is standing against the fireplace and he is definitely using the shadow he’s casting to appear bigger and more threatening, a trick he usually only uses when he’s wearing a cowl.

“What’s going on?” Tim asks.

“Tim!” Chad turns to him. “Get your father to see reason. I’ve been telling him that this is the perfect time to tell everyone Jason is alive. He wants to… to hide him like he’s a dirty secret.”

Tim raises an eyebrow. “What does Jason think?”

“Jason doesn’t know what’s best, Tim, he’s not okay! He has a gun in your house, for crying out loud!”

For the sake of the intensity of the argument, Tim pretends not to notice the batglare he’s getting from his father and focuses on giving Chad a batglare of his own:

“So? You have a problem with my brother?”

Steph is squeezing his hand enough to hurt. He isn’t sure who’s holding who back now.

Chad takes a step back. “You people are insane. Mom was right. Trying to help you guys is useless.”

“ That’s what you’ve been trying to do?” Steph blurts.

Chad shakes his head and storms out of the room… And just like that, Chad’s gone. Gone from their lives, hopefully forever, and if not... Tim knows last year Duke learned a lot about restraining orders.

“I was wondering when you two would come pick him up,” Bruce says. “I hoped it’d take a little longer, it’s nice having him home.”

“Where is he?”

“First… what is this about a gun?”

“First of all, it was Damian’s fault for giving him our address.” Steph shrugs. “Second of all, the gun is the least dangerous thing in Jason’s room and right now I’m more dangerous than any weapon you have, so where is he ?”

“Library.”

They bolt out of the room and straight upstairs. Tim is so caught in the relief of the biggest source of problem being gone that he gets careless. Jason always said Tim is too quick to forgive, even if he doesn’t forget, and he guesses that is true. When he enters the library and he finds himself facing a startled Jason, he’s not angry. Mildly annoyed, for sure. Relieved that his worst paranoiac fears rooted in PTSD are proven to be untrue. Concerned by the fact that Jason looks almost small, younger, maybe because he’s wearing one of Bruce’s shirts or because his expression is so off guard.

But, most importantly, Tim isn’t holding Steph’s hand anymore.

“Jason Todd, you mOTHERFUCKER!”

“No, don’t- ”

But it’s too late. She leaps and dropkicks him and Jason screams in pain and soon the two of them are literally rolling on the floor yelling insults at each other and knocking an entire table sideways. Tim sighs.

“Say uncle! Say uncle right now, you musky bitch!”

“ It’s musty, dumbass!!”

“You’re that, too!”

He sits down in one of the comfy reading chairs and waits for them to get it all out of their system. At some point, Steph is straddling Jason’s back pulling him backwards by the nostrils and he somehow is reaching back to tickle her sides and both of their gazes meet Tim’s unimpressed glower. They stop.

“You two done?”

“She started it!”

“ Bitch- ”

“Enough already,” Tim groans. He waits until both look appropriately ashamed and get off of each other. “Steph is right, though, what the fuck, Jason?”

Jason cringes, but still tries to play it cool, as though nothing unusual happened. “The news had my face, I decided to lay low.”

“And how’s that working out for you?” Steph snaps. “It took us three whole days to find you without actively looking. Bruce found you even before.”

“Also lay low hiding from what? Us?”

Grumbling something impossible to understand, he stands and crosses his arms in a clear attempt to look tough. In the absence of his leather jacket and the presence of all of Tim’s annoyance he only looks stupid.

“Look, I freaked out, alright? Me being found out was my fault.”

“How the heck is Chad’s stupid selfie your fault?”

“Because I knew it was a bad idea, okay?” Jason snaps. “I shouldn’t have sat there and made dumb excuses, I should have told him to fuck off the moment he saw my gun. I noticed him taking the stupid pictures, but I didn’t even care that I could be in one of them, I thought it wasn’t worth waking Tim up. All these months playing house and messing around with you guys made me reckless and soft. ”

Steph retreats a step as if he had slapped her.

“Okay, Jason, I’m willing to put up with a lot of angsty bullshit from you, but… Is that really what you think of us? That we’re, we’re what, bringing you down?”

“That’s not what I said!” He runs his fingers through his hair in frustration.

“No,” Tim interrupts. “He's right.” When Steph makes to argue, he raises a hand asking her to listen. “You did grow reckless. That’s what you’re supposed to do, Jason. You’re supposed to relax and have down time and mess around with us. And if shit happens… We have each others' backs. You’d known that if you had come home, because you’d know Steph and I spent the past three days trying to cover for your stupid butt, since we knew you’d want that.”

Jason doesn’t say anything for a minute. When Steph doesn’t either, Tim continues:

“You don’t have to just survive anymore, you know? I thought you knew that when you agreed to live with us. You’re family.”

“You sound like Dick.”

“I mean, Dick was the first person that treated me like family. Maybe that’s why I was so... Hm. Never mind.”

“You’re still upset he fired you, huh?”

“No. I mean, I have been. But I know now it wasn’t personal. He was doing the best he could, even if he didn’t really understand what I needed back then. I know Dick always loved me.”

“Hm. Did you talk to him so he could apologize or did you work all that on your own and forgave him by yourself?”

“Nice try, but right now we’re talking about your issues, not mine.”

Because Steph had been awful quiet for a while - which is something highly unusual - they turn to her in question. They find her wearing her furious expression, the one that puts fear for their lives in criminals hearts, but the effect is ruined by the fact that her big eyes are pooled with tears.

“Oh shit. That’s new. I didn’t know she did that. I thought she destroyed her tear ducts when she was a kid or something. What do I do?”

She simply shakes her head. “I get you, Jay,” she says, her voice a bit wobbly. “Admitting you have something means knowing you can lose it. But is the fear of losing it worth throwing it away altogether?”

Jason pulls her into a hug. She sniffles and rubs her face on his chest, purposefully wiping her runny nose there before she hugs him back.

“I hate you so much, Jason.”

“I hate you too, Steph,” he says softly. “And, from the bottom of my heart, my bad.”

She sniffles again. “Tim, get your gay ass over here. This is a triple hug situation.”

Tim snorts and mumbles something about the fact that Dick can never find out about this or he’ll never forgive them for not including him.

He joins the triple hug nonetheless.

The trio ends up sitting on the floor, their backs resting against the table Steph and Jason knocked over. They learn that Jason had escaped to one of his old hideouts when he heard the news. He was both annoyed and creeped out to find Bruce already there waiting for him and the fucker had the gall to bring Alfred along to make sure Jason wouldn’t say no.

In exchange, they tell him Damian was offering to kill Chad on Jason’s behalf, which makes him bit moved.

“Bruce had already said everything you said, by the way,” he tells Tim. “It’s scary how you’re more like him than his own biological son.”

Tim rolls his eyes. “We said the same thing because we’re right.”

“It almost sounds like you do want me to go out and tell everyone I’m alive.”

“I mean, yeah, but that doesn’t matter.”

“Wait, what?” Steph frowns. “You want people to know Jason’s alive? Then why did you make me spend hours sitting in front of a computer hunting tweets about this glorified zombie?”

“Because if Jason’s secret goes out, it’s for us, not for him,” Tim says. “It’s a pain to be part of a public family. We’d get to go out in public without worrying about being seen and to, I don’t know, post stupid pictures online, mock old people together in Bruce’s galas, but it also means that he would have to avoid reporters and have a double life like the rest of us do.”

After Tim finishes speaking, Steph nods as if that makes sense. Jason finds himself frowning at his feet.

“I’m gonna do it.”

“Wait, what?”

“I’m gonna come out as a living person. I’ll maybe even pepper in the fact I’m also queer, just to spice things up.”

“Jay, you don’t have to…”

“No, I don’t. When it was Chad’s bullshit about me having to live my best life, I wasn’t going to, but if it’s for you guys, I can do it. Steph’s right. I can’t live a half live." His smile twists into something wicked. "And I know exactly how to do it.”

Congratulations, @JasonToddWayne! Your twitter account has been successfully created.

The first and only post is a picture of a man in a leather jacket and sunglasses in the middle of a fancy lobby. Hanging upside down from the chandelier above him is no one other than Dick Grayson-Wayne holding a flashlight right behind the man’s head to simulate a bright aura. Around him, some kneeling, some standing, but all holding out their arms towards him are all of the Wayne kids, Tim, Cassandra, Duke and even Damian. If you look closely, you can see a smiling butler on the background and, further, a shadow that looks very much like Bruce Wayne facepalming.

The caption of the picture simply says: I lived, bitch.

@dgraysonman retweeted that.

@stephssss retweeted that.

@thomascommaduke retweeted that

@babsgeez retweeted that

@BruceWayne retweeted that

The thing about being part of a scandal you purposefully caused is that you get to kick back and watch the world burn around you while you wear an evil little grin on your face whenever people ask what the hell you were thinking. Tim used to get annoyed by interview requests that had nothing to do with WE and everything to do with his personal life, but for once he enjoys watching the messages piling up and eventually saying no to all of them.

Bruce makes a brief and vague declaration about his son being back from the dead, no big deal, and he expects everyone can respect his family's privacy in this delicate moment. He gives the press just enough and refuses to elaborate. Only liars give too many details and they’re not lying. Not entirely, at least.

Of course, Jason doesn’t help by posting the weirdest freaking memes to his twitter account and, whenever someone tries to get answers from his, his retorts vary widely from “I returned from the grave to wash Damian’s mouth with soap” to “I was captured by a group of murderous ninja that dipped my corpse in a cursed pool that brought me back to life”. Unfortunately, he gets verified and no man should hold so much power.

They return to their lives, Tim in his room, Jason in his and Steph on her couch. Sometimes they even meet in the kitchen to play Uno and prank call Dick - it never works, because Dick always says he’s flattered that they wanted to hear his voice, but it’s the thought behind it that counts.

They go on patrol sometimes. By this time, the public seems to have caught on that Batgirl and Red Robin are basically a duo. Sometimes the Red Hood is included in the mix. For once, Tim doesn’t mind that they know as much.

He thinks they’re heading towards more peaceful days.

DUCK DUCK BRUISE

Duck Robin: hey stephanie what the hell

Duck Hood: Do I even want to know

Bruise: we need our own groupchat

Duck Hood: Why is it named that?

Bruise: bc we red red and purple

Bruise: u never played duck duck bruise?

Duck Robin: its duck duck goose steph

Bruise: u and i led v different childhoods

Duck Hood left the chat

Bruise added Jason Todd to the chat

Bruise changed Jason Todd’s name to Duck Hood

Bruise: u cant escape us jay

Drake Robin: one of us! one of us! one of us!

Duck Hood: Next time either of you complain about not getting laid I’ll show you a screenshot of this conversation.

Jason, Tim and Steph are walking home. It’s still day and, even if the sun isn’t quite shining because this is still Gotham, it’s nice and warm outside. The reason they went to get groceries together is because Jason had been horrified to find out that neither Tim nor Steph knew how to pick fruit and they spent a good part of their afternoon arguing over which apple was the ripest. Tim refused to get out of the shopping cart until their groceries were paid.

It had been fun.

Steph forced them to carry all the bags, arguing that she is but a frail young woman even if Tim is pretty sure she can bench press him. The real reason is because she wants to play Pokemon Go on the walk home and that’s valid, so they carry the bags. She is one of the few people of Gotham that isn’t afraid of getting mugged, so she might as well use that privilege.

A text stops her from catching a bulbasaur right before it stops her entirely.

“Steph?” Tim calls, his brow furrowing in worry.

“It’s happening again,” she whispers.

The brothers approach her to look at her phone. They’re already familiar with this at this point, so none of them is surprised to see a headline and a picture.

MYSTERIOUS BOMBSHELL SEEN LEAVING JASON WAYNE’S APARTMENT

Tim recognizes the outfits they wore two days ago on the day he snapped and forced them to take out the trash together, which ended a week long battle of wills. It’s also the day the biggest bag ripped open and an obscene amount of RedBull cans rolled down the curb. The picture is them watching the disaster. Steph is a pretty girl, but that picture is not doing her any favors. Her face is all scrunched up, as Gothamites tend to be on the rare occasions they see the sun, part of the ripped trash bag still in her hand. Jason has his hands on his hips looking like every bit of the mother hen he is and he is wearing crocs over socks (Tim has sworn to kill Roy Harper for corrupting his brother like that, making him think that’s an okay thing to do and say disgusting things like just try it, you annoying hipster, it’s comfy. )

“You know what? They called me a bombshell, I’m not even mad.”

“How come it’s Jason’s apartment? I’m literally the only person in this household with a dayjob!”

“First of all I'm an university student. Second, you only do actual work because you’re a sucker, you’re all trust fund babies. And that includes you, mr. Crime Lord.”

“Thank you, miss Eats All my Fucking Food.”

They resume their walk without reading the rest of the article. Tim thinks to himself that this is not too bad. Then it gets worse.

“Hey. Are those reporters?” Steph asks. “In front of our house?”

It only takes a glance to find out that she’s right. There is a small group of people hanging out near their apartment complex even though there’s no apparent reason to be there. Any decent Gothamite knows you don’t loiter for no reason, because you never know when the freaking Killer Croc is going to randomly pop out of the sewer or some crap. Those people are there with a purpose and that purpose involves a lot of them holding cameras.

“Yeah, I’m out,” Tim says.

“What?”

“This is the first time I’m not involved in the news. I’m going to enjoy my immunity. You two are on your own for this one.”

He turns his back to them. Enough is enough. Sometimes you just have to draw a line in the sand, let the universe know what you’re willing to put up with on that day. Tim is not willing to deal with this. He gestures at Steph and Jason not to follow him as he stalks into the adjacent empty alley. He takes a long, deep breath and shouts at the top of his lungs:

“COOONNEEEEEEEEEEER!”

Tim had never been better, or at least that’s what he tells himself 50 times in a row. He chose to be in denial and deny he will. He sits on the floor of his best friend’s room and takes a deep calming breath of the fresh air coming through the window. It doesn’t smell like gritty cities or nosey reporters at all.

Conner finally comes back and hands him a bowl of popcorn before taking a seat by his side. He turns on the old television in his room. Tim smiles.

“Hey, your siblings are on the news,” Conner says.

Tim glances at the phone Conner is holding. It’s a picture of Steph walking into their building carrying Jason in her arms as one would carry a toddler, one arm supporting his bottom and the other pointing threateningly at the camera. There is no doubt in Tim's mind that they’re mimicking the meme on purpose. He doesn’t bother reading the headline. He doesn’t want to know. He simply puts the phone aside and hugs Conner.

“I don’t want to go back to Gotham ever again. Let me live here, please.”

Conner laughs. “Sure, Ma’s been trying to get me to kidnap you for a while now.”

“Good. I’m going to learn farm work. I’ll bring honor to us all.”

“Sure," Conner pets his hair. "It’s been a whole day now. You already miss Jason and Stephanie, don’t you?”

“...yeah.”

“I’ll fly you back home tonight.”

“Thanks, Conner, you’re the best.”

Despite everything, there’s no place like home.

#batfam #jason todd #tim drake #stephanie brown #red hood #red robin #batgirl #impulse control? idk her #i swear i was gonna wait to post it but lmao #i mean it's already written so #here take this

[yiangchen]

I know this is super basic to ask for the shipping then when it comes to Bellarke, but i REALLY need an answer for number 3 XD

Okay, I know you just asked for 3, but since the ask says I’m supposed to answer all three, I answered all three. Hope you don’t mind!

Send me a ship and I'll answer three questions based on if I ship it or not.

Ship It

1. What made you ship it? 

Honestly? I think tumblr??? For reasons unknown, I actually used to be a Fl.arke shipper. Yes, it’s horrifying, I know. How I ever thought they had chemistry is BEYOND me. I’ve talked about this before on my blog--not much though because it’s really fucking embarrassing lmao--but I actually considered not continuing with the show after Finn died. I don’t really remember why I stuck with it. All I remember is that I watched s1 and 2 without even knowing Bellarke was A Thing, and during the hiatus before s3, I discovered tumblr and was caught completely off guard by all the Finn/Fl.arke hate. Everyone (aside from the CLs obviously) were obsessed with Blarke, and I must have read some posts about them because by the time 3x02 came around, I was sold. At this point I was still a relatively casual viewer and from the moment Bellamy unnecessarily brushed his fingers down Clarke’s cheek while she looked at him like he was her whole entire world--let me tell you, I was freaking out and convinced they were gonna happen that season...Needless to say, it has been one hell of a journey.

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

So many things, so I’ll just name a few...1. I absolutely adore enemies to friends to lovers ships, especially if they are slowburn. 2. The co-leader dynamic they had in s1 was incredible. 3. Not to be shallow, but they just look good together. They are an aesthetic, okay? 4. The head and the heart, which is probably one of the most misunderstood things about them. It’s not that Clarke doesn’t feel things and Bellamy does; it’s that they deal with emotions in different ways. While Clarke compartmentalizes, Bellamy wears his heart on his sleeve, at least in s1-4, I mean. 5. How soft they are with each other. 6. The trust and faith they have in each other. THE DEVOTION. 7. The way they forgive each other when no one else will. 8. Bob and Eliza’s chemistry is unmatched!!

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

I’m not sure if this is unpopular, but I feel like prime time for Bellarke was s3, and at this point, even if they do happen, I don’t think Jason will do them justice. Of course I want them to just fucking kiss already and I want them to be endgame because we’ve waited so long, but part of me will always believe that they waited too long. The set up for romantic Bellarke was all there in s2, and then in s3, even though the Bellarke was good, they should have been canon that season. L never should have come back. Gina never should have been introduced as Bellamy’s (first) time jump girlfriend. Bellarke should have fucking happened in s3, and if not then, the next best time was s5. After 4x13, the buildup was all there for romantic Bellarke, and instead we got...well, you know what we got. Yet another time jump girlfriend for Bellamy, one he’s still with over two seasons later. It’s just really really really annoying. I can’t stand it when a show builds up a ship and then delays it happening to keep people watching until the end. It’s just not organic!! Prime time for Bellarke to happen was s3 or s5, and Jason blew it. At this point, I want them to get together just so I can actually see them kiss on screen, but it just won’t hit the same as s3 or s5 Bellarke kissing would have. It just won’t.

#bellarke #i love soulmates #the 100

[hannawatchesesc]

So hi! I wrote that rant few days ago, and decided to watch Eurovision: The Story of Fire Saga just for… fun(???) This is my edited live reactions, and serious not spoiler free nit picking.

Here you go, so you don't have to watch it. These are in the order of appearances.

This is made with EBU???

Why the fuck Americans cannot play Europeans without terrible accents

Not really sure if Iceland has this terrible electric grid? If the power will cut if you use two keyboards and disco lights, maybe you should be worried about your infrastructure…

Picturing Icelanders as wool/fur dressing people living in the 1950’s, seriously.

Yep, for sure the Nordic way of life, living with your parents as 50-year-old.

I think these names aren't Icelandic

Iceland: whales, wool, fur, knitting, Vikings, glaciers, and icebergs. Elves. Lava fields. Northern Lights. So many jokes about being relatives and everyone knowing everyone.

I think only thing they forgot is Blue Lagoon and the football chant.

The after recording of the dialogue is terrible????

 

Ja Ja Ding Dong is really kinda good. It should have been in Icelandic, and it could have been "the iconic national winner which never qualified for finals, but everyone back home loves”.

What is that 1950’s buss? This movie makes Iceland seems like a third world country, not the 16TH RICHEST in the world based on GDP per Population.

People not caring about national final…

I'm going to die of second hand embarrassment.

I don’t understand this “Iceland is in the middle of nowhere, so they have never seen modern stuff” narrative. I’m surprise they didn’t travel to Scotland in Viking ship.

Like Icelandic people, have you seen minifridge and hotels before? Based on this movie, you haven’t.

There aren’t any pre-Eurovision things at all for performers.

Oh god I hate these accents.

Why they talk like toddlers all the time? It's like adult people in Europe don’t use adult vocabulary when speaking English. (Like, they just used word "club dancing"?)

 

I feel like this Russian song isn't really the song Russia would send...

I see the homophobia commentary, but he is so stereotypical Russian oligarch type of character.

Pls. Shouldn't there be a little more people in rehearsal? Press and audience maybe?

They haven't rehearsed at all? Have they sat at home for two three months doing nothing?

They just casually decided remix their song and start rehearsing it DAYS before semifinal.

No costumes, no staging, no choreography?

"Everyone hates UK so zero points" à THEY EVEN MADE A JOKE ABOUT THIS, AND STILL ESC IS HELD IN UK

I think Iceland has champagne glasses.

How they don’t know other competitors? Lars is supposed to be ESC superfan.

 

I this sing along part was kinda fun.

In the bigger context just a fan service kind of feeling, like “see, these people are legendary right, here you go, have Alexander Rybak for like 5 seconds.”

And why they started it with Madonna and Cher? Very Eurovision related. Not at all used for Americans to understand even something. How about using ABBA and Celine Dion if you wanted something familiar for US audience?

Think how amazing this could have been if they would have talked their own languages!

Mark "second hand embarrassment" as my cause of death.

These American tourists are like one jab on Americans, and rest of it is making fun of Europeans being mean to them.

This movie is sooooo slow

 

Why Scottish hosts are from Eastern Europe?

As a Finn I'm not going to accept that cheap copy of Lordi was representing Belarus, mixed with 2015 Belarus???

And as a Finn I can say for sure Wonderfour would never qualify from our National Final.

Didn't they read the rule book first? Anyone? I think you can find it in PDF in Google (you can)

The staging is so underwhelming. And this audience wtf?

As if they wouldn't stop the music when performer could be hurt.

I think it's almost insulting to say, that audience would laugh at anyone in Eurovision.

Lars is super selfish all. The. Time.

Nobody checked if they were alright after that accident.

 

This voting system? Spain, Italy, UK, Germany performing? Too many performers on stage? I though Finland was in this semi, but hey, I think they just guess starred and never made it to voting part even though they performed.

Did the Icelandic delegation just leave Sigrid alone in the green room?

How the fuck this movie can lasts 2 hours?

Now Switzerland and France are giving points, and they are not in this semi?

Russia was one of the countries in the scores, but he said that he wasn't performing in this semi?

He is going to die to hypothermia before reaching the shore. Water is super cold if they are dressed like that.

Aand after saying that. Why they are dressed like that? It's supposed to be May? They were dressed like in the middle of winter when they were in Scotland. Even Northern Europe has spring in May.

 

Where are modulations? Wind Machine? Pyrotechnics?

How Finland is now in on final, when they didn't qualify from the semi WHERE THEY PERFORMED? Or where they moved to another semi? Was firs SF overbooked?

I don't know if this final confession would be allowed in Eurovision

And suddenly they changed the song?

Thank you, Graham Norton, for pointing them being disqualified.

So they had rulebook after all.

And everyone is like well this super basic ballad is so touching. I can most definitely name 50 similar songs

Language change, why.

Also, this movie had one ballad. That is the most unrealistic thing.

 

End thoughts

This whole movie seems like unnecessary prolonged version of this America Is So Winning Eurovision Next Year from The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. I can't even choose which one is more offensive.

Out of all European countries they chose Iceland and Greece (super popular tourist destinations), Russia (well you know US-Russia relations) and UK to be the center of the story. I guess it could have been Germany and France instead of Iceland and Greece to be more even more obviously “European”

Making the semi look at least somewhat correct could have been so easy. How it is even possible to mess that up so badly.

ALL EUROPEANS HAVE VERY STRONG ACCENTS!

Here is actor from UK, Sweden, and Greece! And all these Icelandic extras. Europeans!

Can we talk how problematic is the fact that 1) Will Farrell is 10 years older than Rachel McAdams (why Hollywood cannot cast actors that are same age and equally attractive?), 2) TWO attractive female characters are all over him like he’s the most amazing, charismatic and beautiful man in the Europe, 3) This movie isn’t passing Bechdel test

All the dick/incest/fart jokes are super American type of humour.

#euroviisut #eurovision #esc #eurovision song contest #esc 2020 #eurovision 2020 #eurovision: the story of fire saga #will farrell #rachel mcadams #txt #rant #ranting #rant.txt #vittu #vittu mitä paskaa #liveblog #live reaction