#only reblogging bc i made the post at like 2am

[sungbeam]

here to flood your inbox with the questions✨

BUT HI DUCKIE MEIMEI 💗

3, 4, 9, 15, 18, 19, 21, 23, (IM SO SORRY FOR STEALING SO MANY NUMBERS BUT THESE QUESTIONS ARE SO GOOD), 28, 29, and 34

signing off with love

- ash

ash jie !!!! tysm for ur ask ^_^ and omg ty for the influx of numbers hehe <3

fanfic writer asks

3. What's been your most popular fic this year?

oh it was definitely my beomgyu drabble mine !! it was the fic that got me a ton of my followers and it's my first post to reach 1k and 2k+ notes which was super exciting :')

4. What piece of writing are you most proud of?

find my answer to #4 here!

9. What's a scene you wrote this year that you're particularly proud of?

hmm kind of a hard question cuz sometimes i think i'm a genius and other times i think a scene just doesn't work 😭😭 but ,,, i'll say i remember being super satisfied w lost at sea the pilot episode/chapter for my *cough* unfinished riptide!mark lee series ha,, haha

15. Are there are other writers or artists who have inspired you?

OH MY GOD SO MANY (´Д⊂ヽ i'm just gonna name drop :') @ethereal-engene ofc, @loveliestfelix @korijime @jaehunnyy @leejungchans @goldenhypen @/maijunejuly @petrichor-han @tranquilpetrichor @justalildumpling @polarisjisung @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l probs many more as well ksfbkenf but thank u all for being such amazing people who light up my dms and dashboard and make me want to keep writing and dreaming :')

18. Do you have a fic that you wish received more attention?

lmao a few tbh so i'll recommend a few 😁

— cruel summer (kim seungmin)

— the cage (yoon jeonghan)

— in all your endeavors, forever (kim hongjoong)

— 11:22am (jung sungchan)

19. What was your favorite comment, or piece of feedback this year?

definitely has to be ash jie's full review of in all your endeavors forever like having a whole post dedicated to a very through review of MY OWN fic just,,, omg it just made my day fr like woah mind-blown yk? so thank u sm jie :'( 💖

but in general, any feedback or comment just makes me so warm and fuzzy and excited !! once, someone told me they came back from the dead to remind people that i was one of the best writers here and tbh i could cry 😭😭😭 ??

21. Not a question, but a challenge! Say something nice about your writing!

*panics* UHM!! i,,, like that i've been improving in the description department? idk bro (´Д⊂ヽ like i'm trying to be more patient with my descriptions and i def have some work to do w solving my white room syndrome, but i think i'm getting better w touchy feely emotional things lol

23. What fic did you enjoy writing the most?

i actually really enjoyed writing the fics with crack/humor in them a lot! i write a lot of angst and i do enjoy writing that too, but i also love writing banter sm

will specifically mention this jungwon fic and this nct dream fic tho

28. What is your favorite story or chapter title you came up with this year?

OOH !!! uhhhhh i really like "cruel mercy" (wip), "bird hunt" (wip), and "dear chan, have you ever been in love before?"

29. What was the funniest comment or piece of feedback that you received?

AHAHHAHA when i posted the one beomgyu drabble for my october mini series, almost all the reblogs were talking abt how tf were those cheesy pickup lines attractive 💀🤡 tbh only beomgyu could make corny ass pick up lines attractive but yuh ✨ also whenever em rbs my stuff, she's so funny sjfnejfbj like i once posted a fic at 2am and she rb'd w smth like wait y aren't u asleep beam (ignoring the fact that she was also not asleep 💀)

34. What's the weirdest thing you researched for a fic?

LMAOO i don't think i remember half the things i google while in the moment tbh 🤣 but i vividly remember going down the rabbit hole of cheerleader positions and stunts for this one wip bc idk what any of that cheer stuff is called (´Д⊂ヽ and i think soon i'm gonna need to spiral down the dance rabbit hole too @_@ like figuring out waltzes and tangos and what that one dance intak did for isac :')

#sungbeam strikes again #moot ❧ #ash 🤠 #姐姐~💖 #ask games !!

[rouge-the-bat]

tagged by @thatoneweirdhumanisback owo! the other post is CRAZY fucking long with the reblog chain so im just separating my own lol

(and im glad u think im cool hehe :3 n i get being afraid to reach out to Cool Online People but if u ever wanna chat with me or somethin im down owo! i swear as a cool as hell person im also Just Some Guy. i contain multitudes JGKBZJF)

Rules: Tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

Relationship status: im dating my wonderful girlfriend @ megalo-station :3 shes the best i love her so much ♡♡♡ (also shadow the hedgehog and hiei are both my husbands-)

Favourite colour: pink!!!!!!!!!! hot pink, light pink, dark pink, reddish pink, purplish pink, magenta, bubblegum, fuchsia, i love every kind of pink!!!! pink like this specifically is my fave (this exact color is what i use as my name color on discord owo!):

Favourite food: my fave food of EVERYTHING would be hard to pin down so im gonna go for Categories-

if im going savory, then 1000% pasta. like any kind of pasta is fucking amazing. whether its more like spaghetti, alfredo, ramen, simply buttered, or anything else, im gonna eat the FUCK out of that.

with sweet stuff... ough man i love so many sweets. strawberries are probably my fave fruit, and i love having them added to or dipped in various stuff (like put on cake or in brownies, dipped in chocolate, sugar, or cream cheese, etc).

and i fucking LOVE desserts man. i cant even decide what my fave kind of dessert would be bc whatever id prefer just depends on the moment. cookies, cake, brownies, fudge, cheesecake, its all DELICIOUS. i just recently made some rasbperry brownies and ohhh my goddddd they were so good. mixing fruits with dessert is the gd best. adding coconut to them is Top Tier

Song stuck in my head: its only vaguely in my head atm but animals by architects! i just discovered the song yesterday and i fuckin LOVE it. actually i think im gonna listen to it again now lol. addendum: listened to a couple more songs afterward and now i also have god complex by vira and nightmare by megumi ogata going thru my head

Last thing I googled: well, lol. i was looking up a site i could get a quick pic of the color i put up there ^ and apparently #FE0071 is also some sorta technical number for an electric fuel pump?

Time: it is 1 minute after 2am as i get to this part. i just woke up like an hour or so ago. my sleeps fucked up rn lol (i really dont like waking up this early, i much prefer waking up at like, anywhere between 10am and 2pm)

Dream trip: id love to go to japan someday with my girlfriend- once i actually like. learn some of the language lol. theres so many cool things over there related to series i love n i wanna experience them soooo bad. i HAVE to go inside a pokemon center some day!!!! miku concerts!!! series themed cafes!!! and id LOVE to go to the cat island and fox village, i love those animals sooo much.

Something I want: since im a huuge rouge and kurama kinny and have gotten ear, wings, and tail phantom limbs, i sooo badly want to get these:

tho id be ordering the ears without the lil slices on the ear. but OUGH i want these. so gd fucking badly. once i have these ill be unstoppable. ultimate kinny mode

as for people to tag, uhmmm... perhaps @pinkcatminht @yoko-kurama-the-sex-god @hiei-doesnt-like-waffles if yall wanna? :'3

#do i have a tag for these kinds of posts. i cant remember lol #tag game #anyways thanks for the tag :'3 these r so fun to do

[cerealmonster15]

hii! alone and nightmare for the oc asks :]

[oc questions]

HIIIIII yay tyty

hmm so the easy thing would be to talk about yale bc he is my most fleshed out and i do have more or less ready answers for him lol. HOWEVER. i reblogged that post when i got up to pee at 2am with the notion of needing to flesh out less developed characters 🤔

so i'll talk about yale AND another character :D sorry in advance i kept getting distracted explaining overall setup lore ;-;

alone: How does your OC deal with loneliness? Have they ever been completely alone before? How do they act when there's no one around to see them?

yale - my pirate elf guy! he generally likes to stay around people if he can help it. part of his backstory was that he had crews come and go over the years, and i'm realizing i'm a little fuzzy on the specifics i had @-@ BUT i THINK the story was before he made his debut into the main universe's plotlines, he had been without a crew for a long while. i wanna say it was like 10 years? and he's an elf, nbd, but still, 10 years is 10 years, and being more or less alone for that long on a boat, save for stopping into docks now and then... ya get a little weird. yale was initially made to be like, a cartoonish villain, and from a lore standpoint, part of that was just his lack of being around people for so long. he was strange and dramatic [and still kinda is tbh lol] but he kinda kept people at arm's length. he was used to being on his own, and had initially started off his pirate days alone, so SURELY he was FINE!!!

but, now that he's found himself a home in the docks of kronneby amongst the others he's bonded to, he really doesn't like being alone. he had a 2week offscreen timeskip where he went off to fight a seamonster alone, and while he was alone on the boat, he was stuck with his thoughts of his new friends, family, lovers... the danger they'd been put in since meeting him, his mistakes that led to problems, the struggles of anxiety that come along with caring for someone... yale really prefers to be with people and keeping his mind and body active, if he can help it. he likes to play little sea shanties to himself to fill the silence when he can.

Scorpius - scorpius is a newer character who's like... a lobster merman in the water, and a scorpion person [like a centaur lol] on land, usually. he's part of the same ~multiverses~ that yale is, though theyre less directly connected. scorpius is much less fleshed out and i'm still constructing a lot of what his deal is. BUT, scorpius is definitely more of a loner. in most universe storyplots he's in, he spends a lot of time by himself and can get a bit cranky and abrasive with people that irritate him. he's not heartless, but he just doesn't like to be bothered.

the initial universe is based loosely off dnd fantasy, which kinda spiraled away from it the more we progressed, but sometimes i steal from there for ideas lol. in the base verse, scorpius lives alone in a cave with the only company being his scorpion army that helps keep out intruders, and his giant space hamster patron. don't worry about it, there's not a lot of lore there yet LOL. he spends a lot of his time researching other planes of existence - he is originally from Mechanus [a lawful neutral dnd plane that's like made of clockwork stuff] but i think i said he was some sort of space pilot that crash landed where he is now and got amnesia 🤷‍♂️ so he spends a lot of time studying interplanar travel and i guess trying to figure out his BACKSTORY LORE. help me out scorp. i'd like to know too.

he's more prominently featured in our ~modern fantasy~ au. he works a lot of part time jobs, so he's around people more, but he's still really moody. he has a roommate and a coworker that he would quietly consider friends, though he still likes to complain about their antics. he doesn't really feel the need for many companions, and likes to practice drink mixing in his spare loner time. being alone gives him time to think and decompress, especially after long days of irritating customers...

nightmare: What does your OC have nightmares about? How do they deal with their nightmares? Do they tell people, or keep it to themself?

yale - with his newest crew and companions, he sometimes has nightmares about them being put in danger. they've been through a lot together, and quite a few times something bad has happened when yale briefly wasn't around to help. it's hard for him not to feel responsible anytime something bad happens, as he's the captain, and it's HIS job to look after the ship and everyone one it. i don't think he always talks about the nightmares, but if one of his partners is around, he likes to sleep with them for that immediate reassurance that they're alright and safe in his arms ;w; it kind of couples with the above alone feeling - he's worried if he leaves people on their own, something bad might happen again. he is perhaps developing a very minor case of separation anxiety, i think.

Scorpius - hmm... DOES he have nightmares...? HMM.... well, in the THIRD of the multiverses lol, he's a demon hunter. don't worry about it. i suppose it would make sense if he has nightmares sometimes of the demons he's hunted, or perhaps ones that got away. regardless of which universe it's in, though, i don't think he'd be one to talk much about nightmares. he's more of a logical practical thinker, so i think he'd just wake up from a nightmare, recognize it was a dream, maybe pace around the room a little, and go back to sleep.

#asks #apricior #ocs #oc: yale #oc: scorpius #SOWWY i got lost in the sauce #i always feel like i gotta explain everything even tho i cant even begin to cover all the context of these guys lol #they came from the og story of like hypothetical dnd turned roleplay w/borrowed dnd things for flavor #it's a shared thing i do w/ a friend lol just for funsies #and new characters now just get dropped into the multiverse soup

[well-shit-im-a-morosexual-now]

Ahh, I know it's a bit late, but can i rant to you about the lesson 44?? It really was such a great lesson and i just can't stop thinking about it (plus, i really love your thoughts and theories, so if you want to, i'd love to hear more of them!! 😍) (also sorry if there's any mistakes, it's 2am here where i live lol)

- the whole start when MC meets Asmo first made me kinda emotional??? Like, maybe it was also the soundtrack's fault, but i found it so bittersweet that his special power as the angel was to see the good in people and when he became a demon, it turned into charming others to find out their deepest desire. Idk, just seeing all of the brothers and how they were same as now and different at the same time was so amazing

- while i'm not sure if it's the first time, but Mammon has def called out MC for spacing out and also for not looking where they're going. One of those cases was when they where on their date at the carnival and MC bumbed into him, so Mammon thinking that he's a morrosexual is just so funny lmao

- also, what i found fascinating, is that one of Barbatos home screen messages is that Lucifer was actually the one who introduced Levi to anime. Which makes Levi getting into anime all the more complex, bc now we now that not only Lucifer had a part in it, but also MC, and ahhhhh i just love that so much

- since the '???' voice is def Michael, I wonder how long has he been watching over MC. For example, was Simeon sent as an exchange student bc of MC? Or was it all a big coincidence that the one human who interfered with the Celestial realm and he needed to supervise just so happened to be the exchange student? It also makes me wonder if Simeon was not only demoted bc he might've helped the brothers, but also bc of his "easy-going" personality, which also seemed to be looked down on by other seraphims. Idk, it just seems like since they were so strict with everything, that it would be weird if one of the seraphim's didn't fit their standarts of what an angel should be.

Anyways, i would really love to hear more of your thoughts and theories on this! Everytime om gets a new lesson one of the things i can't for are your thoughts and rants about them, they really make my day (and also make me realize that i miss so much stuff while reading the lessons myself lmao) 😊!

I hope you have an amazing rest of the day/night ^-^

first off: I AM SO SORRY!!!! THIS IS SUCH A LOVELY ASK AND NJKSNDIOJWINEJ FUCK I HATE THAT I MISSED IT FOR SO LONG I REALLY HOPE YOU SEE THIS REPY OHMIGOD. Due to reasons (life being a fucking mess) I haven’t been on tumblr since Feb and I really do hate that I missed this. I love long asks where I can just ramble back at ya and I really hope you see this

- The whole lesson was amazing and I’m always up for someone to rant to me! I posted all my summaries and theories of the lessons form 45 and up on @still-a-morosexual-help and reblogged them to this account as well. They’re all pretty long but full of theories if you wanna see.

- Yes! Yes! This! there’s something so bittersweet about seeing them as angels! Like I 100% believe that they fit better in the Devildom and that they are probably happier there as well but that doesn’t dismiss their lives in the Celestial Realm. They probably still have such good memories of it and just the whole thing gives me so many feelings

- Right! He does bring it up in the carnival and in S1 when they go to steal the grimoire to piss off Lucifer enough that he’ll stop brooding in his room Mammon yells at MC for spacing out too. I think there are similar incidents in some Devilgrams & events too, plus he semi-regularly calls MC “Dummy”. MC & Mammon both looked at each other and said “what a fucking idiot I love ‘em” and I think that’s beautiful.

- What I think happened is that when MC brings anime up it doesn’t exist yet and then they go back to their own time and everyone forgets they were even there though the effects of their visit linger, so Levi forgets what happens but MC telling him to check out anime & manga falls into his subconscious. And then they fall and Levi’s self esteem drops even more and then eventually anime and manga are created and Lucifer in a bid to get Levi interested in something since he’s the only one of the brothers without a hobby/hyperfocus tells him about the newest human thing: anime/manga or even gives him the first few chapters of a manga series. Lucifer doesn’t think anything will come out of it, considering Levi didn’t latch on to any of the other things Lucifer tried to introduce him to (like music, books, cars, fashion) but Lucifer giving him this kickstarts Levi’s subconsciousness and the part of MC telling him about it and he gives it an honest chance and actually gets hooked on it.

- Ooooh I never thought of how MC would have affected the angels by their visit. It could be totally possible that after their visit Michael wanted someone to keep an eye on them and he sent Simeon once the chance became available. At the end of S2 he did mention that he’s kept some tabs on MC right? I have a very vague memory of it. About the easy going thing - from what’s being mentioned I always thought Michael had a very childish personality? Like yeah he’s strict and has a very strict idea of what angels should be like but it’s all under the sweetest and friendliest of personalities. Technically an angelic parallel to Diavolo while Raphael was an angelic parallel to current Lucifer. And I’d like to think that no matter what their personality was like as long as they did their job well and acted like a good angel Simeon would have kept his position. Also Simeon’s also being shown to be scary and strict when he gets serious/pissed off (like during the play in S2 and when he was trying to get MC & Mammon to help out at the Angel’s Halo in S3) But at the same time Lucifer later mentions that Simeon was the only relatively normal one from the Seraphim so it makes sense once his closest friend had fled the other two would have been able to outvote him

- I’m really sorry I didn’t upload my summaries and theories for the other lessons during the last few months but like I said before yesterday I uploaded all my detailed summaries and theories till Lesson 54, and the rest I’ll upload in a couple days. I really hope you see this so that we could talk about them.

I hope you have a great day/night too!

#asks #answers #my headcanons #my theories #obey me mammon #om! mammon #swd mammon #obey me leviathan #om! leviathan #swd leviathan #obey me simeon #swd simeon #om! simeon #obey me michael #om! michael #swd michael #obey me lucifer #om! lucifer #swd lucifer #mammon x mc #mammon x reader #obey me #obey me! #swd obey me #obey me shall we date #shall we date? obey me!

[introtae]

— content creator year in review!

tagged by @jinvant & @monotape ♡ 

i've only been making gifs for a little less than a month, so this is more like a month in review for me 😅it also means i don’t have very much to offer in regards to this tag, but i'll do my best to not be overly repetitive!

› first creation of 2020

this jungkook set!

› most recent creation

these gifs i speedmade at, like, 2am in the middle of a genshin session with friends

› a favorite creation 

hoseok being pretty 🥺

› a creation you’re proud of

maybe this one? or my gifset for tae’s bday!

› a creation that took forever

my taehyung birthday set took me an awfully long time to do because i’ve never attempted anything like it before! i’m happy with how it turned out for my first time trying to make something with that many gifs, but i definitely have room to improve.

› 2020 creation with the most notes

this! it also happens to be my first original post? wack

› a creation that deserved more notes

all of my gifs did way better than i ever expected them to in my short time creating & i’m very thankful for the notes they got, but if i had to choose, i’d say my hobi set because i was really happy with how it turned out!

› a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it

does bts count for my new fandom? 😅i’ve recently started getting into a few other groups as well, but i haven’t gotten the chance to explore making any content for them :(

› a creation you made that breaks your heart

anything and everything vhope related makes me melt 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

› a simple creation you love

sweet taetae bc he owns my whole heart! it was originally supposed to be included in his bday set, but i loved it too much & had to make it its own set :(

› a creation inspired by someone else

i’ve just now started to start thinking of creating sets that are more on the complex side, so i haven’t really gotten to post anything inspired by other creators yet 😔but hopefully in the near future i’ll be able to start stepping outside my comfort zone & explore new things inspired by others!

› favorite creation created by someone else

soft in the soop jungkook by @j-sope lives rent free in my mind 24/7. i love nalina and i love those gifs so much i could cry for at least 5-7 business days about it. i also think about this joon gif by @jjoon at least once a week. it is the Official Namjoon Peach Gif in my mind & one of the prettiest things my eyes have ever been blessed with seeing 🥺

there are many more creations i #Love but i am silly and haven’t created a tag for my favorite creations yet :( it’ll be my new years resolution ig 😎

› some of your favorite content creators from the year

everyone i follow is so talented & deserving of so much love for the amazing content they create/reblog!! i am shy BUT also a big lover of spreading love so i’ll set it aside to shout out some of my favorite users. — @jmin @flipthatjacketjiminie @balenciaguks @jiminslight @taemaknae @joenns @monotape @hobeah @jinvant @jjoon @j-sope @lifegoesmon @kkulmoon @jung-koook @bullsht @hopekidoki @syubb @seoksjin @joonghwas — y’all rock 🕺🤠keep up the amazing work!! 

special mention to @j-sope for being my absolute favorite person to ever exist ever in the history of ever ever forever ever. ur so kickass & cool and i love u. ur my angel. also shoutout to @joonghwas & @monotape for doing a lil boogie-woogie and worming their way into my heart. it’s absolutely illegal but i suppose i’ll let it slide this time 💗

› tagging: anyone who wants to do this!

#i hope those who aren't my mutuals are ok with being tagged 🥺 #tag game #if this is still a trend next year & i'm still around #i won't be a babie blog anymore 😎 #i should've created this blog a while ago instead of hiding away on my old star wars main 😳 #LOL

[chuckbass-love]

Could you do a fic where Steve or Chris falls in love with an exotic dancer? ❤️

Hi, i hope i’ve done a good job with this. I’ve done it as Steve and i hope you love it

Dirty Dancer

GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to whoever made this gif, if anyone knows who made it pls let me know so I can give credit. I genuinely just search gifs up on google and I never manage to find out where the original gif is from bc of so many people re posting gifs. I never wanna give credit to the wrong person! So if this gif is yours or if it’s someone you know then let me know and I’ll credit them. Thank you💗

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.

Warning: Fluff, light smut, explicit language (sorta)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Dancer!Reader

Summary: It’s Steve’s first time at the strip club and your first week as a stripper...

You never thought it would come to this, stripping for money and yet here you are, your first week in your new job. It paid well and you need the money for school. You’ve always had a talent for dancing so why not put it to good use. 

You were already racking up some regulars that were quickly becoming obsessed with you and the way your body moved up and down the pole, you were informed by the other girls that having regulars come to you within just one week of being here was rare. You must really be good. 

It was the last night of your first week here and although at first you felt a sense of shame for doing this, it soon faded when you got the hang of things. Plus the money was insane. 

As soon as you get to the dressing room to change into your clothes your boss approaches you. Telling you that you’re working the private dance rooms tonight, which means you’ll have to do the rounds on the floor to see if anyone wants one. You didn’t hate this but you didn’t love it either. Money is money. 

“Someone’s looking sexy” a familiar voice calls out to you as you check yourself out in the mirror, you turn around to see your colleague Jessica in the doorway. 

“Well i mean, this is average but you... Dam” she giggles as she walks over to you to help you put your heels on. 

Once you’re ready you head out onto the club floor, it’s packed in here. Time to work your magic.

As you strut around, flashing a couple of winks to some of the randy men, you spot a group entering the club. 3 guys. All 3 of them are fine as hell but there’s a rule here. You have to let them get a drink and sit down first before you approach them, if they come to you first then it’s fine. 

“Sam, i don’t even know why you brought me here” the tall blonde one chuckles as he looks around the room whilst leaning on the bar, his eyes flicker over to you, meeting your gaze. You look away instantly and strut off. 

Steve had never been to a strip club before neither had Bucky and Sam was determined to teach the two of them a thing or two. They get their drinks and find a seat. Right by the stage. You spot them all joking around but your attention is mainly on the tall blonde, he’s your type. You don’t stand a chance though after all, you’re just a dancer and he’s a regular guy.

“Excuse me” a voice calls out, breaking you from your daydream to see if it was calling to you, he was. You approach the group of guys with a friendly smile.

“Do you do private dances?” you nod in response to his question and he nudges the blonde. 

“Sorry, i don’t mean to be rude, i’m Sam, this is Bucky and Steve. Steve here would love a private dance” his name is even cuter. Steve.

You grin as you hold your hand out for him to take it, Sam pushes him up and out of his seat, handing him some money. His hand grips onto yours and you lead him to the back room, locking the door to signal it being engaged. 

He takes his jacket off, taking a seat down onto the chair in a huff. You can’t help but notice that he seems off. 

“Is everything okay?” you ask nervously “I’m fine, honestly i am” you shrug it off as you remove your cover up, your low cleavage purple dress catches his eye.

You strut over to him, the music playing quietly in the background. Your back faces him as your hips start to grind in a circle, your ass brushing over his crotch, you feel him start to get hard. 

He rests his hands on your waist, stopping you mid dance. 

“Okay what’s up?” you stand up, sighing. “Nothing it’s just, do you mind if i ask you something?” you sit down next to him, motioning for him to go ahead.

“Why do you do this and doesn’t your boyfriend hate it?” you look down at your hands before bringing them back up to his blue eyes. 

“I don’t have a boyfriend and i dunno, i love to dance and i need the money for school” you shrug and he rests a hand over yours.

“Shall i continue now or not?” you really liked him, he was attractive and very obviously not the douche bag type. You respected that about him. He nods and you go back to your previous position before turning around to straddle his lap.

You take his hands and rest them onto your ass whilst you continue to grind your crotch on his, teasing him further. 

Minutes later, the time is up. He grabs his jacket from the table and you place your cover up over your shoulders. You both exit and he returns to his table with his boys. They lean in closer to ask him if it was good and he grins at them. 

The rest of the night consists of private dances to all the major dick heads in the club, some try to get a little too handsy, leading you to snap at them. You have to make sure they know their place. 

It’s now 2am and your shift is over, you head back to the locker room, changing out of your stripping attire and back into your high waisted denim shorts and jumper. 

You slip on your converse and collect your money on your way out. As you walk out onto the streets, the cold hair hits you like wave. It feels good, you flick your hair out of your face and start to walk to find a cab. 

“Hello again” you jump out your skin, turning around to see him. Steve. He’s leant against the wall outside the club, his mates are nowhere to be seen.

“Hi, your mates left you?” he looks around as he walks closer. “Sure does seem that way, they left with some girls” you continue to walk and talk with him.

“So is this what you normally look like when you’re not stripping” you can hear his nerves in his voice.

“Pretty much, not exactly sexy bu-” 

“Oh i beg to differ” you freeze in your spot

“If you’re looking for a hookup, i don’t do that okay? i just want to go home” you don’t mean for it to come out as snappy as it does but you can see he’s not at all fazed by your random outburst.

“I’m not after a hookup, just company i guess. I don’t really wanna be alone again tonight and besides i like you” he what?

You can’t believe your ears, he likes you. But why? You’re a stripper, you just snapped at him and you’re probably not even his type.

“Yeah right. You don’t even know me” you laugh, continuing to walk with him

“No seriously, like i know we only met tonight but i think you’re great” you both come to a halt as you stand near a cab. 

“Look, come back to my place? no funny business or whatever you want. I just want to get to know you better” it’s too tempting to pass up. You reluctantly agree, getting into the cab with him.

You soon arrive at his place, it’s a nice but small apartment and it suits him, very chilled decor. A double bed in the room with Egyptian cotton sheets. You sit down on the edge of the bed, removing your shoes. 

“So, how did-” you cut him off

“No no, if you want to get to know me more, at least let me ask stuff too” he holds his hands up in surrender, signalling for you to go ahead. 

“So, Steve. What do you do?” he tenses up a little at the question

“I can’t really answer that” but why not? “Okay then, what’s your last name?” he smirks “Rogers”

“Steve Rogers, i recognise that name. Wait, aren’t you Captain America?” everyone went on a hype a year ago, The Avengers was all anyone spoke about. 

“Indeed” he joins you on the edge of the bed 

“So i gave Captain America a lap dance earlier. Wow. Guess i can tick that off the old bucket list” you both break into laughter at your joke.

“How old are you?” 

“I’m 21″ he seems shocked. 

“I’d have guessed 25 but not because you look old. You don’t look ol-” 

You can’t hold it any longer, he looks so good. You press your lips to his in a sudden kiss.

Once you pull away he sits there in a state of shock.

“You really don’t know a thing about women do you Rogers?” your little giggle comes out and he shakes his head in admission to your question. He seems so innocent. It’s obvious that he’s a virgin. 

His body language screams it. 

“I’m exhausted” you stand up from the bed “maybe i should go home, i know-”

“Stay, there’s enough room for the two of us in my bed and it’s a little late to be travelling home alone” he wasn’t wrong. He stands up too, taking a white shirt from his drawer, throwing it over to you. 

“Wear this” you smile, walking into the bathroom to change and get ready for bed. You walk out to find him, in nothing but his boxers. He’s ripped, his body looks like it was sculpted by gods. You quickly look away and shuffle past him nervously, making your way to the bed. 

He finishes up in the bathroom then steps out of his room to lock up.

You both get into bed and adjust the pillows to how you like them.

You lay there, facing each other talking for a while until you feel yourself getting sleepier.

--------------

The sunlight flashes through the blinds, instantly waking you up. You rub your eyes as you look at Steve next to you. He looks so peaceful. You quietly get out of bed and head into the living room to find your bag, you check your phone to see it’s 7:00am. You should probably go, you collect your things and shove your shorts on with his shirt too. It���s too comfortable to take off and you figure he won’t miss it. 

You unlock the door and make your way out, hailing a cab to get you back home.

Steve reaches his hand to the other side of the bed, only to discover that you’re not there. He sits up, looking around the room. 

He searches around the small apartment, you’re nowhere to be seen. 

Great, you walked out. 

--------------------

You arrive at work again, it’s your third week here now. You were really getting good with your moves and the money is flooding in. 

It’s only a short one tonight, a dance on the stage and a couple of private dances. As you take your money from your stage slot and walk into the locker room, Jessica is waiting for you. You shove the money into your bag.

“There’s some dude out there asking for you” you turn to face her “wait what?” 

“Yeah, tall blonde, very hot” It’s him again.

He’s made a couple of visits to the club since you walked out on him that morning, before he woke up. 

Each time he comes in, he asks for you. You’ve gotten to know him a bit and you’re starting to like him but the thought of him settling for you when he could have a woman who was more together was horrible. You didn’t feel good enough for his attention.

“You again” you call out and his face lights up.

“Me again. Look can we talk?” you roll your eyes and lead him to the private dance room.

“You can’t keep coming here just to talk Steve. I gave you my number for that” he pulls you close to him, taking you by surprise. 

“Let me take you out on a date” your eyes widen at his offer. 

“Please” you wrap your arms around his neck loosely and his hands fall to your waist. 

“Fine, you can take me out” he smiles down at you and you walk away from him. 

“How about tomorrow?” you agree, winking at him before exiting.

----------------

It was time for your date with Steve, you decide on wearing a little black dress with some matching black heels. You strut up to him as he’s leaning on his motorcycle, greeting him with a hug, he presses a kiss to your cheek as he hands you the spare helmet. You get onto the bike, making sure to grip onto him real tight during the ride to the location.

The bike comes to a halt and he parks up at the side of the road. You look around, taking your helmet off to discover that you’re outside of a restaurant. Italian to be exact. He rests his hand on the small of your back and you both walk in. He’s wearing black pants, a white shirt and a jacket, smart-casual dress sense. Not too formal.

Once the waiter seats the two of you, you speak up.

“How come you wanted to take me out?” you rest your head in your hands, giving full eye contact. 

“You’re attractive and funny and like i’ve stated plenty of times i just want to know more” he sure knows the lines.

“I like you but why do i get the impression that you struggle to believe that? That someone could actually want you” 

“Because i’m not the girl worthy of being treated like this”

“Why not? Because you work at that club? You said yourself, it’s for school”

“You deserve a lot better than a girl like me okay” he shakes his head as your drinks arrive. You take one sip and look around. This place is fancy. Too fancy for you. You stand up from the table.

“I gotta go, this was a mistake” you storm out, he follows closely behind.

“Y/N WAIT” he runs over to you, you stay still as he stands in your way.

“Steve, i think you have the wrong girl here. I’m not your ty-” he crashes his lips to yours.

His tongue swipes across your bottom lip and you moan slightly making way for his tongue to enter your mouth.

“Stop with the ‘i’m not good enough’ routine. I’m a grown ass man and i can decide who i want to date”

You feel the tears brimming. You’ve never really felt worthy of love and now a guy who is quite literally perfect is telling you he wants to date you.

“I see this going somewhere but it can only go somewhere if you let it. If you truly don’t want to then i’ll leave you alone, i’ll stop bugging you but if you want to give it a shot then i’ll be thrilled” 

You look up at him, his blue eyes meeting yours, making you melt. He’s so attractive and sweet.

A silence falls upon the two of you whilst he awaits your decision.

----------------------------

That was a couple months back. You still work at the club to help with school fees and supplies but you don’t work as often.

“Steve stop” you squeal as your boyfriend tickles you, leaving you with no option but to squeal and writhe around. 

“Okay okay” he holds his hands up in surrender.

“How about this instead. Do you like this more huh?” he leans down, taking your sweet spot into his mouth, sucking and biting at it. 

You let out a breathy moan, letting his hands roam your body.

“Those men might get a small part of you, but i get all of you” he peppers kisses down to your sex until his face is inches away from your clit. His mouth attacks you, sucking and licking your folds. 

“As sweet as ever” 

“Please Steve, just fuck me already” you whine and he chuckles, it vibrates on your clit.

“Of course my lady” he rests his tip at your entrance, soaking it in your arousal before pushing in slowly.

“Fuck, just like that” he flips you over so you’re straddling him.

“Ride me” he instructs, you do as you’re told. 

The slow movements on his length have him turning into a moaning shambles. You know he won’t last long with you doing him like this. But you don’t care.

“Make yourself cum baby” you pick up the speed, bouncing up and down rapidly, chasing your high and pushing for him to reach his. 

You’ve been teasing each other all day. You’d bend over on purpose in front of him, extracting a grunt from his mouth in the process. He’d adjust his size in his jeans in front of you, making sure you saw it every time. 

“Cum on my dick baby girl, come on” his words send you over into your high. Your pussy pulsates at the feeling whilst you milk him for everything. 

You feel him spill into you, filling you up just the way you like.

“I’ll never grow tired of that” his chest heaves 

“Me neither”

“I love you Y/N” you stare down at him, happy tears brim in your eyes at his words.

“What?” you know what he said but you just want to hear it again.

“I’ll admit, you had me wrapped around your finger the second we locked eyes for the first time. It’s clear you’d spent so many years doubting yourself and not believing anyone when they slipped you even the smallest of compliments but i meant every one i gave you and i mean it now when i say i love you”

“Steve, i love you too” 

#steverogers #steve rogers #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers smut #chris evans #chris evans smut #chris evans fluff #captainamerica #captain america #captain america civil war #captain america first avenger #captain america winter soldier #steve rogers x reader #request #smut #fluff

[pianostarinwonderland]

How about your thoughts on the whole character analysis / mischaracterization issue bc I literally just made a post on that and I'd love to hear your thoughts about this! -2am-twst

You know, I only learned recently that the character analysis issue was actually an ongoing issue and I thought the analyses themselves were a trend that died a month ago. 🗿

I almost joined the character analysis train but school got busy and I am far from done with what I’m typing for Azul. 🥲 I’m glad, though, that I’m not finished because I realize that my tone in the analysis can be misinterpreted badly and I have the opportunity to change it.

I won’t make a lengthy post anymore because @lovee-infected and anon themselves have made those posts, but from what I’ve seen, I think both the people who write the essays and the audience reading them have to learn how to be more understanding and accepting of each other’s interpretations.

Those who write the analyses have to write their interpretations in such a way that they aren’t phrasing it as hard facts presented in the game when they are, as I said, your interpretations. You can present your evidences from the canon lore in a factual statement, but not the interpretations you draw from it. And definitely, please don’t say “I find it annoying how...” or “I don’t get why...” because it can come off as rude. And yes, I am wholly aware that my past analytical posts may or may not have come across as somehow rude and ‘gatekeeping’, so I will try to be better at it.

As for those who are reading the analyses, if you don’t like it, don’t say anything rude about it, simple as that. If you want to rant about it, a public space like Tumblr is a pretty risky place because you may unintentionally start more arguments that you’ll have to deal with. Well, I can’t stop you anyway since in the end, it’s your blog, not mine, but just be aware that those things may happen. But if you do want to argue on why you disagree, you’re free to do that! But try to phrase your arguments in a more civil and professional matter that can open up for more discussion because hey, we can all learn from each other! If you go ‘why would you say Leona is so dark and would have a hard time loving ugh’, you may be seen as childish and even rude. But if you go ‘I think Leona may not be as dark as what you say because (insert canon evidence)’, that makes way for a healthier discussion where not only the involved parties can learn something but those who so happened to stumble upon the discussion (if ever it is a public one happening in the reblogs or comments section) can gain something out of it.

In the end, none of us have a say on how the characters would act like except the Twst writers. We’re really going off based on the (little) information we have been given. And heck, for all we know, Twst can write off Jade as being scared of butterflies as canon ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I don’t expect my post to be able to do much, but I still hope that the fandom can come to a better understanding of not only the characters but of each other. :’D

#twisted wonderland #twst #discourse #new tag I guess wwwww

[hhuta]

Hi I just wanted to say you're the reason I watched Mozart l'opera rock? Uh I have no idea who you are i think I probably followed you by accident or idk maybe Tumblr fucked up but for MONTHS now I have been seeing salieri on my dash I log in and it's like BOOM florent!! So out of boredom I watched it the other day and now I'm utterly obsessed it is on my mind constantly like. The songs are bangers. I want to (fondly) bully salieri. And Mozart.... Oh my god Mozart. I can't think about him without descending into utter incoherence like I've been so utterly charmed by him I don't know what to do with it I sent a picture of him to my friend like 'this is what Mozart looks like' and they were like 'nice jacket. Got gender envy now' and I realised... That it! It's the gender of it all. The ugly purple coat. The shitty hair that I am now in love with. Like I love him as a character but also I just really really wanna look like mikelangelo. anyway. Uh thank you for posting about mor so much that I got into it I am incapable of thinking about anything else now and I am looping lbqfm religiously it is 2am I am sor tired oh my god but if I don't disrupt my sleep schedule to focus on mor I will die

thats perhaps the best ask i ever goOOOOTTTTTTTT SO MANY COMPLIMENTS THERE AND ALSO RELATABLE THINGS I WILL COMMENT ON EVERY SINGLE SENTENCE.

FIRST OF ALL ,,, i need to say right away that i think i know who u are kldjals if u are the person who recently reblogged a place je passe gifset from me then. ur tags gave u away dlkasjdkls i had no choice but to connect the dots !! why did u go on anon lets be friends !!! 

so if u are that person then i think u followed me bc of vixx ldajlkDLKSJ leo is friends with the guy who played salieri in south korea btw u have to know that. ill use that as propaganda to get starlights into mor.

also cannot believe u put up with me talking about mor for mONTHS and not only u didnt unfollow u then went to watch it!!!!!!! im really touched!!!!!!! seriously!!!!!!!!!

"now I have been seeing salieri on my dash I log in and it's like BOOM florent!!" dlksjkljlkLDKS DONT CALL ME OUT LIKE THAT 🚶‍♂️I KNOW THATS REALLY ALL I POST ABOUT BUT STILL 🚶‍♂️

the songs really ARE bangers and fondly bullying salieri is all i do too !!!!!!!!!!!!!! ur so in love with mozart tho ldkajslkd tHATS REALLY CUTE that was me before. the. second act begun. and my attention went to. someone else. but also "The ugly purple coat. The shitty hair that I am now in love with" u jUST HAD TO END HIM LIKE THAT??????? "ur clothes and hair are ugly and thats why i love u <3333" dlkajslkjlkjLKDLKSKL

u wanting to look like him is so valid tho i bet if u dm-ed mikelangelo he would tell u where he buys his clothes and how he does his makeup im really not kidding right now

and omg you're so welcome 😭😭😭 being loud on main finally payed off... im so happy and honoured that u decided to check out the musical bc of me saying incoherent things about salieri !!!!!!! 

and i cannot stress enough how much "I am incapable of thinking about anything else now and I am looping lbqfm religiously it is 2am I am sor tired oh my god but if I don't disrupt my sleep schedule to focus on mor I will die" is literally me ... im not kidding .. rn is less worse but i used to listen to lbqfm on repeat at 2am too everyday ...... i listened to it more than 100 times in 4 months.......... i replaced that with songs from la legende du roi arthur after i watched it but still i always go back to mor when its very late at night 😭

anyways the sentence "Hi I just wanted to say you're the reason I watched Mozart l'opera rock?" alone was the best thing i could have read . question mark and all. thank u sooooo much for sending this it made my whole monthhhhhhh 😭💕💞💗💗🤧

#come off anon lets be friends :(((( #u should make a mor bloggggggggg #im sounding desperate bc i am #u seem really nice i love how u described it all ldkjs #thank u for taking the time to send this 💕 #asks #keep

[maybankiara]

aight so last night i made a 2am post and managed to upset a few people with my (slightly) off wording so here’s a redo.

“not everyone is meant to be a writer” means that it’s okay if someone is in the obx fandom and not writing. bc of so many writers and fics it seems like that’s almost the only thing the fandom does. you don’t have to write if that’s not your thing. it’s okay if you don’t want to. you’re not worth any less. you’re not any less a part of this fandom than any other person, regardless of whether you create content or not.

that being said, the fandom could use with more gifmakers, editors, artists, theorists/analysts, everything. don’t be discouraged if you do this. if i wanted just fics, i would’ve gone to ao3 or ff.net. many people would like to see more of non-fic content. 

also, the term “bad writer” isn’t a thing. there’s writers whose writing skill is not as good at the moment, but the only way to get better is to write. get feedback. even if it’s just people hyping you up, it’s making you write more, and become a better writer. bad writing, on the other hand, is where all writers begin. it’s a natural thing. get through it. don’t let the hate bring you down. 

don’t send hate. don’t call people bad writers. don’t insult people because in your personal opinion, they are “not good enough”. no one’s on their high horse. some are better writers than others. some are better artists than others. everyone has something they’re good at, even if it’s just being a genuine and kind person. 

use the “read more”/”continue reading” function. i beg you. it’s genuinely off-putting when you don’t use one and make people scroll through tons of text without wanting to. (it’s on the web only. you click “enter” after a paragraph and it appears on the side, the three little dots.) please. for the sake of everybody. 

tag properly. i get that you want to gain more recognition, but it’s not fair to use tags that aren’t related to the story. don’t use the pope tag if you’re writing a jj fic. jj fics have more popularity, more notes, and this causes pope fics to not be seen in the pope tag. it’s not just about the writers and their “need for notes” - it’s for the readers, too. it’s difficult to find fics in tags cluttered with irrelevant content. 

if you want recognition/feedback/help, ask people instead of resorting to things that compromise other people. everyone i’ve spoken to in the fandom is nice and friendly, i’m sure no one will turn you down, at least not harshly. give it a go. people don’t bite. i’m always there if you want advice or help or whatever. 

if you have a problem with someone, bring it to them instead of making posts about it. i’ve been on both sides of this situation. because of the post i made, people misunderstood my point, made their own posts without letting me know they have an issue with what i posted, and it escalated. this would’ve been prevented if someone actually messaged me and said “hey, i don’t like the way your post is coming off” and i’d say “oh shit that’s not what i meant at all” and realise there’s been a problem. nobody feels good. 

once again, don’t feel pressured to do something you have no interest in just because everyone else seems to be doing it. we’ll love you regardless of whether you actively contribute content to the fandom, or you’re just here to reblog a thing here and there. 

and don’t send anon hate. if you do that, fuck off.

#outer banks #obx #felt like this needed a redo #shoutout to @thatjohnd #and @that-pogue #for their additions to my original post #this is for all the people who misunderstood my point #shotuout to those who didn't #d.tag

[lethbians]

can you explain what's going on right now? i keep seeing big IT blogs talking about some discourse or something but i have no idea what they're talking about other than it involves you lol

alright i like. i truly do not like having diScOurSE out in public because i’m not one to air out my dirty laundry 24/7 but seeing as how it was brought into public against my will i feel like the least i can do is clear up the situation for those who’ve been seeing the posts. 

i’m putting this under the cut bc it’s long. tws for some biphobia, brief mention of transphobia and, at the end, a rape mention. 

so if you don’t know: hi, i’m migz, i’m an it fandom blogger. its okay, i know, its really cool. part of my shtick here is that i like to turn normal thirst tags into works of art for the sake of comedy. perhaps you’ve seen some of my highlights from my “fhg” tag - perhaps your brain has been spared. either way, it became kind of “my thing” around the third or fourth week (mid nov) of me having this blog. at first, i tagged just about every ask i got mentioning the thirst tags with “bill hader” - they had to do with him, so why not tag him? it would draw more like minded people! about two days into that i got a message asking me to tag my nsfw. i am a big dumb idiot, and apologize for not initially doing it. i havent had a following bigger than like 10 in several years and completely spaced on basic etiquette. so by the end of november i was tagging everything applicable  with “notsfw” and “bill hader”. 

now you’re caught up.

on december 1st i got this message from user billhaderanti:

now i want to start by saying i absolutely was in the wrong here. i didn’t even think about how many people were being subjected to the asks i was getting - especially ones who had no idea they were all jokes. i don’t track the bill hader tag, so it just didn’t even occur to me - that’s ignorance on my part, and to anyone who was subjected to the terrors of me before my tagging system: i am genuinely sorry. i relay the same sentiment in my response, though you can tell i’m on edge.

and they replied:

clearly they Were offended by it but thats.. not the point. at this point, im feeling Really weird about the whole interaction, but still understanding, because again - i GET it. i know my posts are gross - that’s the point. it doesn’t make it excusable, though, which is why i understand why people are offended. so i responded with the only solution i Knew would keep us both safe and happy posting on our own blogs. 

so i thought this would be the end of things! i’d been pretty anxious lately already since i’d started to receive anons telling me i was gross and whore-ish for thirst posting in this way (i delete all of those, so if ur thinking about sending one, i guess no one’s stopping you but it won’t be seeing the light of the dashboard). i’m unsure if it was immediately or a few hours later, seeing as how i have a bad concept of time and the post-dates are right on the edge between nov 30 and dec 1, but i went to their blog - because anyone who has been on the internet knows the opportunity to vague post is near irresistible. and...what do ya know

fair! it’s their blog. however i am an emotionally fragile egg girl and immediately got freaked out. the odds that they were the only one who thought this were low. and, again, i’ve been very open on my blog about how important it is to respect boundaries; my posts are absolutely prone to breaking those boundaries people have created for themselves. 

so i made my own, semi-vague post, letting my following know (and i’m pretty sure i’d answered asks about it before, but this is going to be long enough w/o me searching those up too) that i understood if they wanted to block me or unfollow or whatever - people need to create their own safe spaces. the tension is pretty clear in the tags, i’m not trying to hide that. i felt that the way this woman slid into my dm’s was pretty abrasive (just my opinion/how it made me personally feel) and i let myself be a lil emotional about it in the tags of my post.

alright! maybe this is the end. maybe we both go our separate ways and post happily on our own blogs... except it’s not the end. later in the day (some of this was happening like 1/2am, so now its Day day, i believe - again, not good w time passage lol)

clearly, i’m upset. my groupchat double checked that i didn’t get too emotional in my response - did i mention im anxious about discourse lol - and apparently.. it did the trick. she didn’t message me again. great. it was over. 

at this point, i decided i needed to make an even bigger change. so a few days after i’d calmed down i created an entirely new tag for my thirst posts so if people hadn’t already hidden the notsfw posts or just blocked me outright, they’d have a third option to escape the madness. at this point, id had my blog about 6? weeks, but there were still 2k posts for me to sift through - some of them were completely untagged. i also had to do it post by post, because one of xkits features - the mass re-tagger - was getting blogs deleted for some reason, and i wasn’t going to do that. so i spent a few days going through all 2k+ posts, adding the “fhg” tag. 

YEEHAW! a brand new tagging system, no more hopping into the bill hader tag (minus one or two really funny, not super explicit asks, like the bill hader farquaad meme), and, tbf, i’d completely put this woman out of my mind. i don’t seek out drama and do my best to stay in my lane. yesterday, i checked my activity for the first time in awhile since id put out a couple new original posts that had started to get traction and i Love reading tags. i noticed a mutual had @’d me, and realized i havent checked my @’s in...ever, maybe. i see a post from my good pal billhaderanti. 

since i dont follow them and never check my @’s, i’d completely missed it. however, once i did see it, i was horrified. id gone through all that fucking work to keep my blog My Blog and also respect everyone’s boundaries and it still hadn’t been enough. i’d been awake for almost 24 hours and went. a little crazy. and i didn’t reply immediately because i just had no words. i sent it to my friends because i... i just wasn’t going to be able to figure it out myself. 

there’s a lot to unpack in this post alone, but whatever, i’m gonna put my own grievances with the immaturity of 1. making a callout post to begin with when i’d been nothing but civil 2. making a callout post about something as (in the grand scheme of Life) minor as some tags where i refer to a someone’s genitals as a “whack pack” and 3. making a callout post in such a rude way - aside. at the end, she calls me (and whoever else!) a demonic mlw (man loving woman, we assumed, and then later confirmed with a post further back on her blog). 

which - yeah, we started scrolling. at first we were looking for more vague blogs, and then we just...started finding things. billhaderanti is a self proclaimed lesbian separatist, which... fine. but it’s already pretty clear that this woman hates me on some level simply because i am a bi woman (demonic mlw, remember!) which is just. damn man i can’t believe we are still fighting the biphobic fight lol. so the more we scrolled, the more we uncovered - and not just the biphobic / vaguely mtf transphobic things they posted (or put in tags), but we also found that they had their OWN thirst tags. certainly not as hyperbolically comedic as mine, but they were there, talking about his body and his person the same (and, frankly, a bit creepier for other reasons) as mine. 

there’s one post in particular that snatched my wig in it’s creepiness - and i say creepiness in the sense that it feels personal. like this woman feels like she knows bill to some degree where she can say these things. my tags have always had a sense of distance, as they’re written for humor. and maybe this particular post was written for comedic purposes, but it doesn’t read that way, and if it WAS, then she has no right to call ME out for MY comic tags and posts. 

i’ll let it speak for itself, mostly because i don’t want to read it again. 

i also won’t be going through her blog again to find the posts with biphobic and other Interesting:tm: tags because there are plenty and i just really! want to be done with the whole ordeal! her blog is public and i’m sure you can all find it and look to your heart’s content. 

feeling a bit feral and a bit pissed off now that we knew the depth of how rotten this woman’s vibes were, a couple of my pals made a post or two similar to what my tag’s are like except turned up to eleven (if possible) - and tagged them with “bill hader” (and notsfw!!). yes, a bit childish, but at this point, the entire situation was childish, and making jokes was truly the only way we were going to get through it. another vague post went up on her blog soon after.

talking down to us, calling us children, and then for whatever reason calling us virgins... whatever, weird post. around this time most of us (est) went to bed, because it was nearing 3 or 4 in the morning. 

and then today happened. i woke up fresh and ready for the day after a wonderful 4 hours of sleep and found that jane had made an incredibly intelligent post in response to the situation. i won’t ss it, but i’ll LINK in case you missed it. attached there in the reblog is my own response. i think they can speak for themselves. 

after that, things were kind of jumbled, since i wasn’t online a lot and when i was i was Not checking my activity simply because i was afraid of what i’d see. for the most part, it ended up just being support (which i am very grateful to all of you for - it means a lot that you all enjoy my content to any degree). 

there was some more vague posting from both “““““sides”””””” of the “““““argument”””””” - mostly just people restating the fact that this is a public space and we should All be aware of how we effect others. i still hadn’t heard directly from billhaderanti, so i assumed we’d all be dropping and disengaging and moving on. i still wasn’t blocked, though, so who really knew what would happen. 

eventually, it culminated in this last post. tw for mentions of rape

i’m going to start by saying that 

1. there are nearly no teenagers that were involved in this. im turning 23 in january and most of my friends are 20+. maybe one or two are 19. 

2. none of us sent any sexually violent asks - most of us didn’t send asks at all. i believe one or two of my friends admitted to sending asks however they assured me their nature wasn’t bad; as far as i know, everyone remained civil in whatever went on (again, unclear to me as to what was being sent; no one was actively posting or talking about it. if billhaderanti wishes to elaborate, they can, but i don’t have anything to put in). 

3. before i finish this, i would like to apologize to billhaderanti. as a comedian - not just my stupid tags, i mean in real life, too - i know that humor can hurt. it’s not always funny, it’s not just stupid hahas. sometimes things that are supposed to be jokes just hit people differently and cause bad things. i recognize that. i never meant to trigger you (if you’re reading this) or cause you any severe mental/emotional harm. i apologize for my humor bringing up your trauma, and i never meant for that. regardless of my own thoughts and opinions about the nature of my posts/the thirst tags themselves, they hurt you, and i’m sorry. 

anyway, i’m going to wrap this up (i’m bad at endings, what can i say! steven king and i took the same writer’s class!). if you read all this... sorry. i probably won’t be taking any asks about it, because i find the whole “drama” of this to be stupid and rooted in some seriously biphobic issues this fully grown woman has. 

tldr; i attempted to contain my blog so this woman could exist and function safely on her blog, but it wasn’t enough for her, so she called me out, and then some of the fandom called Her out for being biphobic and mean and overall just immature about the situation. as of now, she’s yet to block me, though her and her wife have blocked a few of my friends. her wife continues to clown on my friends. this post was made for clarity’s sake. the end, i’m getting a drink. 

#discourse #biphobia tw #transphobia tw #rape tw #ok goodbye im done with this im back to #only posting gay clown movie #Anonymous

[burnedbyshoto]

anon: The artist @franeridart answers all of their asks in one mass post with a read more link so maybe you could try that as well. That way you could answer everyones ask but not spam anyones dash with all of your replys

you genius anon, and you genius artist! I just feel like as of late I have been getting a lot more things in my askbox, and I dont want to overwhelm anyone with spam. so, I will be creating these! unless it’s for y’all thirsty hoes asking for extra parts or whatever from very recent posts, expect this to happen every so often! the rest will be below cut. also first time using photoshop? how’d I do yall??? and also like.... let me know if you like this idea??? if not i’ll just resort to spam :)

@your-parental-figure : IK BUT DETECTIVE GUY CONSIDERED BOTH TOKOYAMI AND KIRI TO BE ALL MIGJTS SUCCESSOR DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT MENT??? THAT MOMENT WATERED MY CROPS, CLEARED MY SKIN AND SOLVED WORLD HUNGER

oh season four episode one, you may have been a filler, but you made me so happy to watch. honestly ngl, I was pretty surprised when he said kiri, not because he has no potential, but because it seemed like the top 4 from the sports festival, bUT FUCK YEAH KIRI AND TOKOYAMI!!!!! IN A DIFFERENT WORLD IT COULDVE BEEN THEM!!!!!

anon: Makeup smut for villain Deku should be good. 100% tender, no chicken

honestly, my favorite thing at this point is seeing you all crumble in fear if i’ll even give you a happy ending, and tbh idk if it will be for villain!deku >:)

@ohmycolie: So it’s Saturday night and I’m just sitting at home 🤦🏼‍♀️ could you maybe do a scenario where Bakubaby and Kiri decide to bring Kami into their sexcapades and after their little adventure Kiri is like “can we keep him?” 🤤💕

hi bby, while I can imagine something of this sort I am only a “x reader” blog :( so while its good thirst, I won’t be writing anything about it, sorry :( ily tho!

@michealsheep: Honestly is shiggy ended me after an intense nut like that I’d just thank him

honestly, I want shiggy just to end me??? whatta way to go. death by fucking nut.

bigdickkiri: I don’t get ship wars. Why do people wanna be so mean? It’s so easy to not be a part of any a that.if everyone appropriately tagged their posts, blacklisted rags they don’t like and didn’t act bitchy then they wouldn’t be an issue. - bigdickkiri

neither do I honestly. they’re just people looking for drama at this point, and it’s like... come on... you’re 25... stop

bigdickkiri: What a fantastic evening to tell my favourite writers that I adore them and that they're amazing! Look after yourself and have a gorgeous day! ❤️💙❤️💙 - bigdickkiri

I’m literally the worst. but um, I adore you so much, and I think you’re amazing!!!!! its 2am rn, but I can’t sleep anyways

🍒💥anon: Girl, your blog is having a glo up!!! I love it!! So pretty 👌 How are you doing today? Are you taking care of yourself? *sending good vibes and virtual hugs your way* -🍒💥

teehee, thank you for noticing!!!!!! i’m not 100% happy with it rn, but I haven’t had the time to get it perfect!!! wait a few more weeks and when I have actual down time, im fixing it >:) also, I am doing well, a lot of caretaking today! I never take care of myseld! *accepts the good vibes and virtual hugs because I am touch starved*

anon: I'm part of the protect uraraka squad!!! ♡

me too boo! you wanna fight me on my mochi loving girl meet me on the corner of my fists and in your faCE!!!!! (is this considered cyberbullying?)

anon: WTF @ THAT ANGST I M SAD NOW

this was in regard to my fic “because of you” which I posted because I was in a crying mood. HAHAHAHAHA YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO FEEL SAD I WINNNNNNNN

@joyfullydawn: I just wanted to say you're heccin' amazing??? The fact you named that roommate one "And they were roommates" I just--yes. This is more than ok. This is excellent. Please keep being awesome aaaa

and they were roommates was the first series I had, and the thing I did in celebration for 100 followers.... jesus that feels so long ago and not in fact less than two months ago!!!!!!!!!!! maybe I should reblog my old works so you newer lovely followers can read them!!!!!

anon: would u ever do a part 2 to under the mistletoe with aizawa? its so sad and i just want them to be HAPPY

I am planning on doing it!!!!! it’s in my requests, so no worriesssss ;)

hermana anon: hermana that todo angst 🥺🥺you’re literally the best angst writer jdjdbd

okay but for real do I write actually good angst??? asking for a friend..... and HGAIGHJIAORGHUOG THAKN YOU FOR THAT COMPLIMENT!!!! PLEASE RECOMMEND ME ANGST FICS BECAUSE I LOVE CRYINGGGG

🍒✨ anon: this has literally nothing to do with anything that’s on your account right now but do you think that dabi sends shoto happy birthday messages? i like to think he does because even if he’s a villain, he still lowkey care about his siblings - 🍒✨

this was from a very long ass time ago, and im sorry I never responded to you sparkle cherry anon, but I definitely do believe that he sends birthday cards. with his baby bro’s increase in his fangirl club, he now is unafraid to send shouto a card. its always the only one that catches shouto’s attention when he goes through them because they’re weirdly personal. shouto, being a smart yet dense idiot, believes its someone in the class pranking him.

~ I won’t be posting these messages, but they were from awhile ago when I was hitting a rough patch with my insecurity as a writer and my ability to give my all to you. there are many of you, 19 messages in total, where you told me why you loved my writing. I never responded to them because they make me cry even now looking back at them. to each and every anon, I thank you for saying those kind words. to @saladsharkz, @thecryingsombra, @olivenight17, @shutupwylow, @expressyourstarstruckrebel, and @awkward-theaterkid thank you as well. there is another non anon, but they asked not to be revealed. thank you so sososo much.

~ I will not be posting these as well, because again, drama from awhile ago. but this was in regard to the anon who did not like the kinklist I had created for kinktober. while now I think I am doing a pretty damn good job, and no one has said otherwise, to the 2 anons, @connors-my-boy, and bigdickkiri, thank you for fighting an anon that was never your responsibility to take <3

@w0w-s0-3dgy: u make me uwu so much🥺❤️ I LOVE YOUR PAGE BABE I HOPE YOU’RE DOING WELL!

BBY I LOVE YOU AND I AM DOING WELL NOW!!!!! THANK YOU FOR LOVING MY PAGE LITERALLY WHERE WOULD I BE WITHOUT YOU?!?!??!!

anon: You followed me and idk if it was just to be nice or if you want to be friends or what hdhakanskenebdhsiq

im starting to follow back people that make me happy. it’s been awhile since ive been on a followspree, but I follow you back when i see kind messages from you, when I see that you’ve liked so many of my horrible posts, when you reblog my things with the most amazing tags. I follow you because I want to be your friend, you’re always welcomed to be my friend!!! hell you can literally be like “bitch listen to this” and never once having spoken to me I will respond with “give me the fucking chisme my queen”

anon: *gives u an encouraging and comforting yeehaw*

now.... now I can conquer the world, thank you

anon: Hi! I love the way you're writing things for kinktober, and I'd personally love if you could reblog what you're writing multiple times because I'm at uni most of the day so I miss out on a lot. Pd. I absolutely adore your writing! Please keep up ❤

I AM TRYING TO REBLOG MY STORIES NOW BUT OMGNGSOUHFIPA YOU LIKE HOW I WRITE?!?!?!??!?!?!

heathers anon: Its the anon who sent the Dabi heather au. I send it because i know your popular and a lot of popular blogs check your blogs. And I honestly struggle with other blogs because they ignored most of my asks.

teehee, I appreciate you thinking im a popular blog and that other popular blogs check mine, but thats not true!!! sorry for never responding back, but i’m sure they’re not meaning to ignore you on purpose. there’s just so much happening things get buried!

@sinnaminsvga : we're both alyssa so it's really interesting to see the nicknames u use bc i see you use lyssa and i got the nickname ari and i think that's pretty neat how we both have the same name but wildly different nicknames

it don’t matter, we be alyssa twinsies!!!!!!!!!!

anon: I was just going through your master list, cause I’m in a stunning mood and why not make a good mood better? and I saw bakugous “sickness and that word I can’t spell” got hella happy for a sec CAUSE YES THAT WAS SO ADORABLE AND I LOVED IT. Then I remembered the heart shattering angst that came with Todos side. So like. Ily but you a meanie.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHA WE LOVE SUFFERING!!!!!! I just... really have a thing for angst it seems... don’t tell my followers though, im in denial over it...

#ask lyssa anything #lyssa doesnt shut up #anonymous #hermana anon #big dick kiri anon #heathers anon #dabi headcanons #thank you all so much I do love and appreciate every single one of you out there :)

[dontyouhearmehowling]

oh my god. Ok so I just scrolled through your blog and my heart hurts because there is so much love and just so much stuff I can relate too and I just ahhh damnnn it I cant even but like can I please have the story of your relationship with this girl your with? please? i'm a hopeless romantic I feel too much I love so hard my own love life is complicated but i know the kind of love you talk about thats exactly how i love the love of my life too so yours is a story I need to hear

ok so. it all started on April 31st, 2018. i reblogged one of those ask games and she sent me an emoji that said “i’m too scared to talk to you but i think you’re great” and i was like do it!!! and she did!!!! she texted me after i had already gone to sleep tho, so i only answered the next day. but then we talked all day. and the next. and the next. and we never ran out of things to talk about and even only knowing her for a few days i already felt comfortable enough with her to talk about anything?? it was wild. since day 1 we’ve had this connection that i’ve never had with anyone else and its my favorite thing in the world. after like a week we already had a bunch of inside jokes, something that i’d never had before, and i was already crushing on her. ok so we became very close friends like immediately, and i mostly ignored my crush on her bc i thought she didn’t like me back and usually i’d get meaningless crushes on everyone at first before i met her. but then this other girl and i started flirting and i realized i didnt like her bc i liked c too much, so i broke things off and kinda went like “oh shit this is real” and decided that i’d just stay friends with c until i eventually couldnt take it anymore and had to tell her abt my feelings bc thats how i am. anyways ok cool meanwhile i made her watch the good place on rabb.it with me which will be relevant later.

ok so fast forward to may 21st or something around that time. its time to sleep bc i have school the next day so we say goodnight, but then i guess she says something or reblogs something and i get sad bc i realize she doesnt like me back. so i make some hashtag sad posts abt yearning and then i realize i told her i was going to sleep and i didnt want her to think i didnt want to talk to her so i text her again and say like “ok i was going to go to sleep but then i got sad abt my crush” and SHE GOES “you have a crush????????” and im there like. what in the hell bc not only did i not try to hide it At All, i constantly posted about it and had an entire tag about her and i thought it was pretty obvious. so anyways i go “yes?? i thoought you knew that?? im literally always posting about it??” and she asks me to talk abt the crush and who it is. i say “just stalk the tag if u want, im going to sleep” then shes like “nO WAIT WHO IS IT” and im like. blatantly ignoring that and my heart is already beating out of my chest but she Really wants to know and then at one point i say “please dont make me answer that” so shE SAYS “you’re making me think that its me” and i say “i dont know what you want me to say” and SHE GOES “I WANT YOU TO SAY THAT ITS ME BC I HAVE A HUGE CRUSH ON YOU” so i just. die. right then and there. also yknow we talk about it and its like after 1 am and im just happier than i’ve ever been. ok so 2 days later she asks me out Officially and its great and shes the cutest gf ever and she made me feel more wanted than i’d ever felt in my entire life. then 6 days later she sends me a big big big text on tumblr and long story short (bc it was kinda personal), she would be deleting her all social media for the summer.

so she was gone. and we had only dated for a week at this point, but we’d known each other for 2 months, and i already loved her. i already knew she was the love of my life. i didnt even try to move on, i’d tell people i didnt wanna move on cuz i knew i was meant to love her. i had another blog like this that i used to talk about how much i loved and missed her (so like. exactly like this). i literally reasoned with myself that like. that happened because before i met her i was in a really bad place after a terrible relationship and i was almost giving up on finding someone who actually made me feel loved bc i thought it would never happened, so i was like “ok so i was in a really bad place, so the universe brought my soulmate a little early just for a while so that i would know i had to hold on, and when its actually time for us to be together, it will bring us to each other once again” like i actually told myself that, in those words. and yknow what? i wasnt even wrong. on july 15th she texted me from an empty tumblr with her old url and at first i literally couldnt believe it but we talked for hours and hours and i asked her what happened bc i thought she was disconnecting for the summer and she said “i was. i am. i just couldnt not talk to you anymore” and she said that she thought about me every single day, and i told her i missed her and she said she didnt text sooner bc she thought i’d be angry at her and ofc i wouldnt, i could never be angry at her and besides, she was just taking care of herself and i said i dont think i could be anything less than head over heels for for, and she said she felt the same way, but wasnt ready to be more than friends yet. but that had always been more than enough for me. just having her in my life would always be more than enough for me. so we stayed friends.

then, on august 9th i got this ask.

and she saw it after i said i was gonna go to bed (bc again, i had school the next day) and she texted me a whole thing about how that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said about her and that i should be asleep but she had to get it out of her chest and that her anxiety made it hard for her to show how much i meant to her so she was sorry if i didnt know and this would probably make no sense but she was tired of keeping it to herself bc shes the luckiest person alive for having met me and that it was gonna be so hard because shes so difficult (shes not) and her anxiety is difficult but that she literally spent every night thinking about me and of buying plane tickets to come see me so that she could be with me. then she was like “im sorry if this is uncomfortable to you and you can just ignore it but i think im in love with you and this is over text and not romantic at all (it was the most romantic night of my life) but you’re asleep (i wasnt) and we arent together but i want to be one day” and until this i was Trying to fall asleep and then i checked my phone that kept RINGING and died a thousand times over and started to answer and she sent other texts saying “i’ve never felt this way about anyone before i’m so in love with you its fucking ridiculous and this is gonna be so complicated but fuck i want this so bad / i’m sorry it took me so long / would you move to new york with me?” and i was This Close to literally fucking exploding like. how the hell was this happening how was it not a DREAM. so we talked and i obviously said i loved her too and eventually she asked me out and thats still probably the best night of my life. other highlights: “i’ve loved you way before august 9th so jot that down” and “off topic but i love you / you’re honestly my other half” and, after i said “you cant make me laugh its 2am”, she answered “i’m going to make you laugh for the rest of your life so help me god” and thats my favorite thing anyone has ever said to me probably and so far she’s kept her word.

anyways we got back together and then she told me that she never even told her friends she broke up with me??? bc that way she could keep pretending we were still together???? literally like sjdksndk imagine being this loved. i dont have to. anyways she wrote poems abt me sometimes and her christmas gift for me was gonna be a book with all her poems and she called it “what we owe to each other” because of the good place (remember how i said it’d be relevant later? its later) bc like she said that when we were watching tgp together on rabb.it thats when she realized that she Really Truly liked me like For Real. and the inscription on the book was going to be “to the girl i love / and what i owe her” and. yall. i cry. anyways one of the poems had a huge impact on us. heres the story:

and she got them but we broke up before she got to mail them to me. what happened was she had some mental health problems and she said she couldnt give me what i needed at the time but knew i’d still give her my all bc thats just how i am and she thought it wouldnt be fair so she broke things off to work on her mental health. she said she would need some time before we could be friends. the last thing we said was that we loved each other. this was in like november 2018, and we didnt talk for months. i actually tried to move on this time after a while, but it didnt take. and then i gave up for good. havent tried since. but anyways, then, on march 11th, 2019, i had my first day of college back in my home country, and we have this “pranks”/games that seniors get to do to the freshmen, and one of them required eggs, and they asked us to paint them, so i panted mine as iron man bc it was easy, but c LOVES iron man. like. LOVES. like in a Whole New Level of loving. once when we were dating she said she loved me more than tony stark and i was like. shook. like she tattooed “T.S” on her ankle after him. u get the point. she loves him very much, its adorable and endearing and i love it. anyways. so i sent her a picture of it saying like “you dont have to answer this but i made this for my university and i thought you would like it” and she answered and IMMEDIATELY something clicked and we talked and talked and talked and it was never weird or awkward or uncomfortable. it never is with her. its incredible, i cant explain it. i Know shes my soulmate like thats the ONLY possible explanation for this kind of connection. its unreal. anyways. we became friends again! all was well.

then one beautiful night she drunk texts me sndjkajs she sends me so many texts and says it sucks that we live so far away and that she saw my posts (in this particular case, one that said something about like. when she talked about love now, was it about someone else?) and she said that it wasnt. and then she went to sleep and i only saw the texts when i woke up and i was DYING bc we had a 4 hour difference and it’d take a while for her to wake up. when she did, we talked and she said she wasnt over me and was scared she might never be, and even though we were still gonna stay friends, it was nice to know that she still loved me. ok so fast forward a bit more and i was starting to wonder if she’d moved on again, when she finds out her best friend had a crush on her, and that conversation ends up with her saying “it was 100% platonic for me / sorry if thats weird i just wanted you to know that” and it was NOT weird it was GREAT NEWS bc i was Hella jealous of her best friend and at first i wondered if they were dating and anyways the fact that she wanted me to know that was a pretty good hint that she still had feelings for me. ngl im still somewhat jealous of h (c’s best friend), but thats just bc im an insecure lil bitch and also bc they get to go out and do stuff together that i cant do with c bc of the distance, yknow? but anyways. then she went on a graduation trip in mid to the end of june and she bought me a magnet. just. out of nowhere. i cannot stress enough how Incredibly unexpected this was. so much so that i actually convinced myself that it meant she was over me????? literally. what the fuck. anyways we named him together and coincidentally (or bc of soulmate powers. who knows) we both had the same favorite names. i still love that.

okay so then we go to july 29th, 2019. first of all theres one of my favorite interactions Ever which was like after i was venting about something and i was thanking her and i said “you’re always here for me” to which she answered “nowhere else i’d rather be” and i still think thats peak romance and i will take no criticism on this. anyways so then she sent me a poem that she wrote based on a song i’d sent her (the song i called “heaven is a place” and its the BIGGEST mood for being in love and i sent it to her bc it was how i felt about her so her writing a poem about it?? literally the best thing ever. love it) anyways it was a beautiful poem and i cried and got very emotional and kinda went too far in my compliments (aka being very obvious about my romantic feelings) and then i was like oh no sorry if i made u uncomfortable and she was like. “you have NEVER. EVER EVER EVER EVER made me uncomfortable” “you’re the only person on planet earth i am comfortably myself around” and “there’s nothing you could ever say that i wouldn’t wanna hear” and anyways it was just very good and romantic conversation even tho we were just cough cough platonic hashtag gal pals hashtag no homo ✌️ and then she was like ok wait. i need to talk to u abt something. and in short she said she was waiting for us and i was like well what are you waiting for exactly? and she was like idk?? for us to accidentally bump into each other in new york in a few years?? WHICH WAS LITERALLY WHAT I’D DAYDREAM ABOUT BACK IN JUNE 2018 BEFORE SHE CAME BACK OKAY so anyways we had a Great conversation and said i love you about a thousand times each and she decided she was gonna buy tickets to come see me. and then she dID like TWO DAYS LATER. lichrally. queen of impulsivity but in the best way possible.

—————

ok quick edit here cuz i forgot to say that when i found out she was coming i asked for my mom’s help to make a necklace pendant for her from scratch. my mom works with prosthetics so she has the material to make jewelry and back when c and i were dating in 2018 i had made this lil design for a necklace that had the moon and the ocean (bc duh) and i was gonna give it to her for valentines day in 2019 but we broke up before that so i didnt get the chance, but when i found out i was meeting her i knew i had to. so i made the necklace in wax, like this:

and my mom took it to her work and heated it up to melt it and keep the shape of it to fill with silver, and this was the result:

i gave it to her when she got here and she wore it while she was here and it made me so happy. ok edit over

—————

ok so we kept being like couple-y but not officially in a relationship bc we didnt want to make her anxiety worse. also at one point she was like “so about the ‘i love you more than the moon/ocean’ thing, since we BOTH love BOTH of the moon AND the ocean, i think its only Fair if we update our love declarations to ‘i love you more than the mocean’ bc its mix of both but thats not a word, buT its pronounced exactly like ‘motion’. therefore we should both start saying ‘i love you more than the motion’”. so now we have both the wonderful, romantic, original version, and the NOT ROMANTIC AT ALL DO U HEAR ME C??? version :) and after this day she always started with the WORST!!!!!! version, and i always started with the Only Valid Version, but we’d still answer each other’s ofc because. well. thats love i gues?? it sorta goes like this though: her: i love you more than the motion / me: i hate u / me: i literally hate u so much / me: i Also love you more than the motion

but anyways she was coming to visit me but the plane ticket wasnt for my home country it was for where i was going to university at (a new university, i was starting over) and when i first got here on this campus, i didnt have a working phone number for this country, and i wouldnt be able to access the wifi for 3 days, so i had no way of talking to her. it was TERRIBLE and i missed her more than anything in my LIFE but when i got wifi (after CRYING to the people here bc theyre the most unorganized uni ever and i was already very overwhelmed and stressed) i immediately called her and she’d sent me over 100 text messages dkfjssjks it was amazing, there were two (2) videos of her singing (which is like. objectively the best thing in the world, and the song was rlly romantic and i love it sm when she showed it to me for the first time she said it made her think abt me), a poem, AND a HUGE text with “i love you” written like. a THOUSAND TIMES. seriously i have a gif of it opening and scrolling bc it was so long that the text wouldnt show up directly on the chat screen and u have to click on it to see the rest. i’d never felt more loved in my entire life by anyone ever. anyways so then it came the day for her to get here and i had to wake up at 5 am to go get her at the airport and the uber was like $40 but who CARES it was the best day of my LIFE and i got there 20 minutes earlier bUT GUESS WHAT SO DID SHE (hashtag just soulmate things) then we facetimed the entire time while she was walking through the airport and getting her luggage and then she hung up to walk to the door where i was and we hugged for like 5 minutes and we were totally in people’s way and also almost fell but it was the best thing in the world and i never should’ve let her go. but, we had to go home, so i did. and we spent 4 days together and im not gonna go into details bc this is already too long but u can always send me another ask about her visit if ur not a coward. also i bought her a hoodie from my uni and whenever she wears it i just. die. in short, those days were the happiest i’ve ever been. this campus res had never felt like home before that friday and it hasnt again since that monday, but i swear to god, during those 4 days, this was the only place i could possibly belong.

anyways then she left and i cried for the entire uber ride home and then i cried all day. lmao. also when she was here she gave me the poetry book, the magnet, and the bracelet. still wear the bracelet every single day and i love it more than anything. but then personal stuff happened and we kinda stopped being couple-y again and we’re just friends now but before new years i asked her if she still loved me and she said yes and she said she’d tell me if it changed so ✌️✌️ im assuming it hasnt. even tho my brain is a bitch and everyday its like. today. today is the day. this is when its gonna happen. buT yknow we’ve spent months before without even talking to each other and we got through that still in love, so i mostly ignore it. and tbh i know that actually like, even if we grow apart now (god forbid, but still) we’ll find our way back to each other eventually. like, i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again: nothing, not even the universe itself, can convince me that shes not my soulmate. and even if it turns out i’m not hers, loving her is still the greatest honor i can think of.

another edit: also i started drawing recently and the first person i’ve ever finished drawing was her and also (surprise surprise @c since you’re already seeing all my feelings anyway) bc of my second drawing i almost missed the deadline for one of my midterms (which was a take-home test) bc instead of writing it i spent the entire day before the deadline finishing the drawing which was a secret valentines day gift (secret as in she didnt know it was supposed to be a gift, she thought it was just a drawing inspired by a quote that she loves) and i finished at 2 am but shes 3 hours behind so for her it was still 11 pm which MEANS it was still valentines day so it still counts, i win, lesbian rights!

#mine #l #answered #dont rb #i dont think anyone will but ​this is personal and i dont want to risk it getting out #i wanna have this bc i love telling people this story and next time someone asks i’ll just send them this post

[soosdraws]

I hope it’s ok to ask for advice but how do you stay motivated with an art blog? I always end up deleting 😭

SO I TYPED THIS UP IN MY NOTES APP BC THIS IS SUPER LONG BUT,,,

ANYHOW! Of course it’s okay! Don’t hesitate to ask anything 💖 I hope you don’t mind the late response, I wanted to take time to answer it because it’s something I really used to struggle with too!

I can only talk about what works for me personally, but I hope my way of thinking helps you out ;;;;

Anyways, first of all I would say: don’t give a shit! About anything or anyone! I also used to have an art blog before this one (that I deleted lol) but it was because I was really focused on trying to get notes and stuff that it completely made me not want to draw??? Or I was focused too much on trying to “find a style” or keep my art blog all consistent and nice. That really made me sad and just… not want to run an art blog. So I deleted. However, for this one, I literally just started it because I was bored one day during college and just wanted to start posting stuff again so I just??? Did??? And THEN I fell back into Naruto and it became like the only thing I drew, which really is where my blog started to grow!

At this point, as you can probably tell, I really… don’t care about much lol like at first I wanted to keep this an art only blog which… UM. YEAH… now I just kinda post anything I want? Even the random thoughts I have at 2AM that are probably really stupid in hind sight. But I think that’s okay actually! It lets other people know who you are better and also kinda gets rid of some boundaries where it allows other people to share their thoughts with you too! And then you make mutuals, then friends, and it’s all really fun lol

Also notes! I think that’s really what brings down a lot of artists. Because it shows that people are viewing your content and appreciating it! And it’s completely valid. Like you’re allowed to feel upset if something you worked really hard on doesn’t get the attention you want. And I fell into that a lot too! Like in the beginning when I posted my stuff (not on this one, but the blog I deleted) I’d probably get a single note or maybe 30 at most? And it really brought down my self confidence, thinking that maybe I really wasn’t good enough and no one liked my art. But that’s not true at all! It’s just very hard to get attention on a site that has millions of other talented people. You’re also VERY talented, it’s just a matter of finding your own audience, which comes in time! Like even now, yeah I have art that hit 2k+ notes, but I also have my fair share that still are in the single digits lol and at first I was still really disheartened by that, but now I’m more okay with it, because as I said, I’ve sorta stopped trying to focus on the notes part. Instead, I just try to post what I like, and what I think is good and if it doesn’t get that many notes, instead of dwelling on feeling bad I immediately hype myself up going like “ITS OKAY!!! There’s always next time!!!” And just draw the next idea I wanted to draw to get my mind off things. My motivator is usually myself and like just always having a next thing to draw lol. And if you can’t think of things to draw, just draw whatever! Like a stick figure, usually studies of things help a lot! From photographs or real life. It really sharpens up your skills 💖 and once you start mindlessly drawing, sometimes you start to just find love in what you’re doing and you find that in the end? It’s okay that your art didn’t maybe get enough notes, because YOU love it.

However, there are definitely times where that’s not the case, and it’s okay to let yourself be sad. Vent it out, even if it’s not art. I’ve just actually taken a nap sometimes when I felt too sad to do anything lol And then refresh!

Which leads to my second point! Draw what YOU love! There’s a lot of artists, me included, that try to draw things that are “in��� or popular, in order to gain a following and that is completely okay!! However, for me I just couldn’t keep up with it and I just became overwhelmed with the plethora of other talented artists that were also drawing for that certain thing and instead fell back into self-doubt. As for this time though, I literally found that I couldn’t stop drawing Naruto lmao. Like I just have so many ideas I want to draw for the fandom and I found that since I’m passionate in it, others who are into it also just naturally fall into it! So if you enjoy it, that’s the best part for sure 💖

And like, if you find that you’ve run yourself dry of inspiration, reason, or love for drawing: take a break! I actually took a really long break from art one time (I mean like… a complete year I just didn’t draw anything omg) because my self-confidence had hit rock bottom. Instead, take time to seek out shows, books, nature walks, or just anything besides art to keep you occupied and one day the want to draw will just like… hit you. And when that feeling hits, draw! And if you like it post it! Start anew too if you feel like it! And if your next drawing inspiration doesn’t hit for awhile that’s okay too 💖 it can be really pressuring to feel like you need to keep posting art in order to keep your audience engaged but that will tire you out. Just post your best quality work that YOU love! And you’ll find that the fact that it getting not many notes or any of that other self-doubt thin that we artists usually have in common, start to fade away a little.

Also, be your own hype man!! Like you didn’t get enough notes?? Post again or reblog your post again and be like “HEY!! I DREW THIS!!!” Like there’s no shame in wanting validation for your work. And if you start feeling bad about the lack of audience just be your own #1 fan. It was like that for me for awhile too, because I started this blog only a few months ago?? And of course in the beginning it was just like me and my one (1) irl friend and I was just like hey I really like this thing I drew!! I’m gonna post it!!! And just kept doing that! Make your art be about YOU and what you love and motivation will naturally come to you! Also don’t hesitate to reach out to your friends to hype you up too. Like obviously, we can’t support ourselves 100% of the time, and during those times just take time to be with people who you know will give you love 💖

And if you do decide to start up and art blog please tell me (only if you want djfjsjdjjs) I’ll support you 💖 we artists gotta stick together since we’re always our worst critic 💪

#I HOPE THIS HELPS A LIL #;-; #if u have any other questions don't hesitate to ask!! #asks #long post #!! #graveyardbooks

[scuttleboat]

About the Shipper

Okay this is show day for The 100, and for some reason I’m feeling a whole host of things, so I’m going to do a brief overview of my blog and fandom opinions, in case you’ve followed in the last year, and wonder what I think about stuff.

OTP: Bellarke

Other canon pairings I enjoy: monty/harper, murphy/emori, kabby, linctavia, bryan/miller, jackson/miller, raven/wick

That being said, I’m 90% a monoshipper so I read and write almost exclusively about bellarke, unless it’s part of a kink ficathon or something. My fanfic is under the name rashaka on AO3 and ff.net.

Favorite Characters:  Clarke, Bellamy

Other favorites:  Octavia, Monty, Raven, Indra, Emori, Murphy, Abby

Favorite non-romantic pairings:  Clarke/Abby, Octavia/Bellamy, Octavia/Indra, Bellamy/Monty, Murphy/Everyone, Raven/Echo (based on one clip alone, I’m sold!)

General Info:

I reblog a lot of gifs, and sometimes bellarke fanfic. 

I type A LOT but sometimes if there’s a big post going around I’ll just comment on it instead of reblogging. Sometimes I will write 1000 words of meta just going into deep detail about my love for a character, my love for bellarke, or an abstract idea presented in the universe of the show.  I don’t have the discipline for regular episode reviews, but I do post reactions/responses sometimes. This is usually tagged under #the 100 meta, or the character's name.

I love jokes and comedic posts. I will reblog a rickroll every time and laugh every time bc someone thought "bellarke kiss" was a real link. I have made posts specifically to LOL at fandom, including the 100 fandom, multiple times and will still do so bc fandom is a circus.

I'm kinda bitchy after 2am, which I consider my prerogative as an American. 😉

Most of the time my blog is fairly drama free, but sometimes stuff makes all the hair on my back rise and I'm like a hissing cat. This is unlikely to happen more than once every months or so, but it might increase over the course of an active season. Most of the time I keep my personal complaints to private conversation, like an adult.

I am fandom old, which means I'm the same age as Bob Morley, but I have better hair. He has two dogs though, so it's possible he's further in his life journey than I am. All snark aside, I don't really talk about the 100 actors that much outside of hot pics or 100-relevant interviews, and I wouldn't call myself a stan for anyone. That being said, here's the charity GoFundMe for school Eliza Taylor founded. It's good work.

Comportment:

I draw a strong line between fandom and The Powers That Be. I don't believe in sending ship stuff to actors, and I don't believe in @-ing negative stuff to the writers on Twitter. I think trying to recruit industry people to our ship, or trap them into saying they ship something especially cast or writers, is embarrassing at best and manipulatively harmful at worst. Please don't try to get the child actors involved.

Unfollowing:

You can unfollow me at any time, for any reason. I may also unfollow you at any time, and it might have nothing to do with the fandom. I follow so many blogs that I don't see everything on my dash, and I sometimes get people mixed up when they change their usernames.

I also unfollow people who post character bashing, particularly if it's a strain of "character hurt Bellamy so they're a monster" because A) fictional characters are not people, they have no agency to cause hurt IRL and have no feelings to experience hurt IRL, B) all the 100 characters do bad things and they all hurt each other, and c) I just don't want to hear the bullshit anymore bc it's probably insincere and it's almost definitely misguided. This isn't to say that I think negative reactions are bad, or disliking a character is bad, but it means I follow 600+ people and I won't miss reading crap that makes me roll my eyes that hard. If you're wondering why I mentioned Bellamy and not other characters, it's because I am an active bellarke shipper and he's far and away the most popular character in the shipdom, which means most reactionary stuff is framed around perceived injustices done to him. It makes it kind of exhausting to love his character so much yet also to disagree profoundly with how so many others experience and interpret him. So I unfollow often, and welcome people to unfollow me if my reactions to the show annoy them in a similar manner.

Also, on the topic of what is "bad" on Tumblr: having any feelings about a show in any direction is not an inherently moral or immoral thing. You cannot hurt fictional characters, you can only hurt the people who create them and the other people who consume them. It is accurate to say that the internet body politik influences how we perceive media and it influences how we talk about it, so it could follow then that moral and political opinions about media are influenced by our perception of political and moral issues. For example, I think fandom is ragingly sexist, and our fandom tips more that way than others I've been in, particularly in its revulsion towards motherhood. There's a lot more -isms I could add to that, and have in the past. HOWEVER, this is ultimately a television show, and we each bring to it a host of preconceived experiences and ideas that we apply to what we see on screen. Since I don't know what everybody else's brain looks like on the inside, I try not to assume that liking or disliking a story element is indicative of how that person sees the real world--because The 100 is not a real world. It is made up. OTOH, sometimes people outright say or enact the stupid shit that is in their heads, and I have a decently long memory for it. And I am trained to spot patterns, academically and professionally. So I do a lot of eye rolling. I'm not trying to say that as a brag, that's how my brain works. I wish it were trained to increase $$ but it's not, so more the fool me.

Also, I think about 89% of the soap-boxing in fandom is just a front for shipping grudges, so you can miss me with that. You can also miss me with the anti-Octavia stuff, the anti-Clarke stuff, the anti-Aurora stuff, the anti-Echo stuff, and the anti-Abby stuff. I'd say the anti-Bellamy stuff too, but literally like 2 people in four years have reblogged anti-Bellamy stuff on my dash, and that was deep in the dark times of CL drama, so I think that's covered.

That's probably way more than anymore needed to know, and I'm sure it will get buried in season premier stuff. But here you go. My passion for Clarke and Bellamy, for their individual characters and for their relationship, it's intense. It's probably more emotionally involved I've ever been in a pairing. Bellarke is... stunningly unique, as a ship goes, and I've been in fandom since I was a teenager so that is saying a lot for me.

TL;DR:

Bellarke is amazing, always leave comments on fanfic that you read, don't steal gifs or art, and ffs be cool about shit, it's only soccer.

#bellarke fandom #the 100 fandom #bellarke fam #fandom #about me #my followers #unfollow

[wildfireornot]

tagged by @pastel-rainbow-galaxy (aka the only person who tags me in cool stuff on here lmao bless you <3)

rules: tag followers that you want to know better

name: W

nicknames: -

gender: this question again? *sigh* psa: label me as cis-female if you wish but don’t assume that means anything about me or how i feel about myself bc plot twist: it fucking does not. (edit: by “label me as” ofc i meant shut up you don’t rlly get to label me ykno? -not adressed to anyone in particular dw-)

star sign: leo (i don’t relate to it tho so eh whatever)

height: 1m71 / 5′6 (the last time i checked was probably like one or two years ago but i guess im still the same height)

sexual orientation: queer/gay/polysexual are terms i use to describe it. don’t call me a lesbian, i don’t like that term, thanks

favorite color: purple, violet

favorite animal: felines/cats/wolves

average hours of sleep: these days i can sleep 9 or 10 hours (usually from approximately 2am to 12 or 1pm), i usually sleep wayyy less on week days when im not on holidays

cat or dog person: CATS

favorite fictional characters: gonna copy/paste my previous answer to this question: ellana (from pierre bottero’s books) - salim (same books) - stiles stilinski – spencer reid - wolverine

favorite bands/singers: papa roach

dream trip: road trip somewhere i can encounter different kinds of landscapes, especially forests

dream job: storyteller

when was this blog created: may 2013

current number of followers: 719

when did your blog reach its peak: do u mean papa roach peak or mika peak? o/ but yeah my blog is kinda lame but idc

time right now: 6:10pm

song stuck in my head: -

last movie i watched: War Dogs (my dad chose it lol) and before that Gallows, which made me extremely paranoid last night lmao bad decision

last tv show i watched: orphan black (watched it a month ago and now i kinda wanna catch up on spn but idrk...)

what i am wearing right now: red shorts with moose on it (i bought them in Canada and i love them lol / edit: hahaha i googled it and that’s the ones), and a “parental advisory consent” shirt lmao remind me why i bought this?? (in my defence i was 15 or 16)

what kind of stuff do i post: (i know this should be a short answer but i feel like going into details oops) - what i reblog: cats, movies, harry potter, dylan o’brien, comics (Marvel, Wolverine...), quotes, words/vocabulary/languages, books, art, TV shows (spn, got, orphan black, teen wolf, carmilla, quotidien -french tv program), cute and motivational stuff, pictures i find aesthetically pleasing, nature/landscapes/forests, posts about historical facts/history/interesting things in general/culture, feminism, queer stuff, nonsense/funny stuff, aaron taylor-johnson, depression and anxiety etc (nothing too triggering -i think?)... i used to post a lot about mika but atm it’s on hold lmao. - what i post myself (not regularly): posts about tv shows/movies, pieces of writing/stuff from my notebook, sometimes art/drawings, personal posts, links to my concert reviews, sometimes pictures ive taken, travel/concert pics... - people/movies/shows I have posted about: Papa Roach, Mika, Fantastic Beasts, Dylan O'Brien, Teen Wolf, The Maze Runner, Matthew Gray Gubler, Criminal Minds, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Marvel, Skins, Game of Thrones.

do i have any other blogs: 2 active side blogs (one is gubleroach, the other i keep for myself), and 4 inactive ones (i use 2 of them as “redirection” pages)

do i get asks regularly: no :(

why did i choose my url: “wildfire” bc of someone whose (old, they no longer use it) username inspired me in a way (this is only one of the 5 explanations I could give for my username), “ornot” for obscure reasons

lucky number: 3

following: 1299 (wow wtf that much??)

tagging: @wosslbird @chillyls @ookaminoki @dolphindewott @this-is-not-an-inspirational-url @sleepylunas @o-misfits @catbvtt and anyone wanting to do this, really :)

#wildfiretalks #tag #pastel rainbow galaxy

[punkscrunchies]

-letsbefriends-

reblogged your post and added:

???? Trouble following that first bit..idk why...

for some reason i cant reblog this and explain bc tumblr’s code is fucking up again so i have to do it in replies

i understand why this may have caused confusion. and this honest to god is not an attack on trans/ace people/pan people. this is more of a “me venting post.” my younger brother (he’s trans, still getting used to that :/) is friends with a girl who has like...a twenty syllable word for her sexuality and she’s only 12/13.

ALSO:

fun fact - being trans IS actually caused by a physical trait! i believe it’s a mix-up of chemicals or signals in the brain. i understand how not knowing this could have caused a mix-up.

my referral to pan people was...rude. my point that came out was NOT the one i had in my head. my apologies. (i think it was 2am when i posted it so that may explain a few things) WHAT I MEANT was that people like to say being “pan” and being “bi” are ‘so different!’ but the fact is that, when it comes down to it, you’re attracted to dick and vagina with both of them. i dont at all understand why there has to be two terms for this, but okay. i’m not going to rant at you about this if you tell me that you’re pan - i wrote this as an explanation.

also the ‘dick and vagina’ thing brings me to the general point of the post itself. WHAT I MEANT in it was that, yes, i am fucking sick of the LGBT+ acronym going from LGBTQIA+ (which was probably the most letters i can accept) to LGBTKAJWJBOCKJABLIGB+. my problem is that people want to describe their sexualities in terms of being gender-inclusive but that’s not how sexuality works. sexuality is what you are automatically attracted to. It’s a deep psychological thing and a biologically female lesbian is not going to look at a biologically male who identifies as female (and hasnt started/taken hormones) across the room and want to sleep with her. that’s not because she’s transphobic - it’s because sexuality is not gender fucking inclusive. i know lesbians have been in relationships with mtf people before, but the attraction, that moment where you look at someone and think “i’d hit that” usually happens after that person has been taking hormones for a while.

 why? she identified as female, right?

because a lesbian is a woman who is attracted to female physical/sexual features. that is how sexuality works.

my problem, therefore, is that tumblr has created this LGBT+ society where everyone has to have a super-specific label to describe them - the girl i was talking about before was attracted to “everybody but biologically female people.” so shes straight, fuckin hetero. the point of a label on sexuality is for two reasons:

1. for scientific research/classification

2. as a general description in order for you to find people who share similar experiences with you (the point of the LGBT+ community)

labels are meant as general descriptors for what is biologically not straight/cis. not what is the most gender-inclusive label you can stick on. L - attracted to female traits. G - attracted to male traits (assuming that G=only homosexual males). B/P - attracted to female and male traits. T - having a difference in make-up of the brain that causes you to feel dysphoria and dysmorphia in your own body. + - ace; agender/etc. You dont need a label to be SPECIFIC, you need it to be general so you dont have to explain your sexuality. God, i have to explain what me being bisexual (and very rarely agender since im not open about it) enough - why would you want to be anything more ridiculous??

here’s a quote from a blog i found:

“Straight girls on tumblr have an annoying problem with inventing sexual orientations so they can feel more oppressed than they actually are. Because what it comes down to is most of them are some sort of boring, every day sexuality (usually hetero) they [sic] have to tack on other words to define themselves and confuse people into thinking they are oppressed... What it boils down to is basically 99% of these...people with weird sexual orientations that they completely made up, are actually...straight girls who are pissed off that they aren't special snowflake enough to qualify for minority status. What they do instead is created sexual identities that no one has ever fucking heard of, that they will never use in real life, and then sit on the internet pretending that life is SO HARD for someone with a sexual orientation that is actually just a personal preference they have when trying to find a mate. All of this is a slap in the face to actual people who are actually in the LGBTQ community because what it does it make the universe less likely to take real issues seriously. ”

Another interesting quote from the same post:

“This sexuality (which by the way was completely 100% invented for a roleplaying game back in the early 2000's)” - in reference to demisexuality.

that’s basically my problem summed up, except incorporating ridiculous genders in too. 

i really don’t think i can go past that in terms of an explanation so. there we go. i guess i could say that, to me, some of these gender identities (some, not all) and sexuality labels (again, some, not all) are on the same level as “identifying” as a race/ethnicity.

anyway i hope this helped. i really dont mean to be offensive, it was a vent post. my problem is not that im being transphobic or whatever phobic we’ve invented this week (let’s not bring up aphobia). it’s that young girls want attention and they’ve come here to get it. it’s a slap in the face after leelah alcorn especially.

also, possibly different issue somewhat related here, but my school’s LGBT+ club has turned into an anime club. so not to stereotype but...there’s a type of people who like. make up this shit.

also, another possibly different issue somewhat related here - my school has had to get a doctor’s certificate for gender dysmorphia and gender dysphoria because the counsellors cant deal with the amount of people identifying as some form of gender identity (especially trans - they like playing with cars and suddenly theyre a different gender!!!!) for attention (theyre all under the age of 15 btw).

okay. i still dont know why i couldnt reblog this from you or message you but. here we are. bye. hope you have a nice day. didnt and dont mean to offend

#-letsbefriends- #why cant i message you or reblog your post????? #its super weird #long post #also #i turned 15 two years ago #im a millennium child #???? #so #?????????? #you tend to get pretty exasperated with this shit when you're in your final year of school and everyone is playing the im oppressed! game