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mostly-imagines · 30 days

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Banished

jason todd x fem!reader

aka jason misses his girlfriend

warnings: extremely mild angst, he’s just mopey (he’s fine)

Jason sits slumped over the kitchen island, head lying in his crossed arms. His now soggy cereal disregarded after barely a few bites.

Dick’s been rummaging through the cabinets for the better part of twenty minutes and Tim sits atop of the nook table shoving donuts in his mouth for the better part of thirty.

Damian trudges past them to the nook bench, taking out a knife and beginning to whittle away at a block of wood.

He glances at Jason with a scowl. “If you’re going to be so miserable, can’t you do it in your own home?”

Jason just grunts.

He wishes. You and Bruce had conspired to trap him at the mansion for the week so he could heal from injuries sustained during the last mission without risk of him suiting up and sneaking away from you in the middle of the night.

It’s not even the fact that he’s basically being babysat that’s got him so disgruntled. He wouldn’t mind it at all if you were here too. But you were dead set that the manor was too far out of your way for work, so you’d stay behind. A lose-lose for Jason.

“He’s just mad his girlfriend kicked him out.” Dick teases, swiping through the fridge.

Tim snorts from the doorway, “Me too. He’s a lot more depressing on his own.”

Jason kept his head down as he blindly reached for the spoon in his cereal and chucked it at Tim’s head.

Tim catches it without thought, continuing, “A lot more irritable, at least. Why isn’t she here?”

“She’s gotta work.” Dick says, scanning through the pantry.

Damian peeps his head up from his project. “But Todd has a rather large supply of less than legally obtained money, does he not?”

“Yeah, but she said she wants to pay her own rent, I think.” Dicks hums, finally giving up on his quest for a snack.

Damian pauses.

“So she wants to live in a tiny apartment?” He asks, a mixture of confused and horrified.

“Watch your mouth.” Jason mumbles.

“It was a genuine question!” Damian protests, face screwed up.

Jason finally lifts his head up, turning to his little brother with a raised brows. “And I’m genuinely going to break your nose.”

It’s an empty threat, maybe. But it was enough to shut Damian up anyways. Jason turns back to his cereal and swishes the bowl around.

Dick rests his arms on the counter across from Jason and speaks lowly. “You know, it is just a few days. She’s coming back.”

“Yeah, whatever.” Jason was never one for showing his feelings—let alone talking about them.

He misses you, plain and simple. Dick could see that much clearly, though the longing looked unfamiliar on Jason.

Bruce lingers in the hallway, just past the island, listening.

He’ll admit (to himself) that he’s worried about Jason. It’s been three days and Jason has yet to show a crack in this demeanor. And while it’s not uncommon for him to stow himself away, there is something quite wrong with the way he hasn’t countered his brother’s jabs at him or teased them.

And while he could do without the blatant threats, he’s proud to hear his son defending his girlfriend, even over trivial things. It’s one of the few moments where he feels like he did right by him as a father.

And now here’s his son, caring about someone else more than he cares about himself. Someone who’s a good person, no less. It had been your idea to trick Jason into staying at the manor, you were scared that he would push his body past its limit when you couldn’t do anything to help.

Bruce knew you didn’t feel great about basically banishing him for the week but he could see that you just wanted what was best for Jason. He could see it so clearly. Maybe Bruce could never have been a perfect father, could never have given his son everything he needed despite having more money than he could ever use. Maybe he couldn’t help him, even now.

But you could.

Bruce peers around the corner, leaning up against the doorframe.

He watches Damian give up on carving at his block and start into the leg of the table.

He watches the bickering that broke out after Tim grab the last glazed donut, which was apparently the only thing Dick could possibly fathom eating.

And he watches Jason.

As Jason’s phone lights up on the counter next to him. He glances down at it with a frown before his face absolutely lights up.

He scrambles to pick the phone up and starts typing away. A quiet action that catches the attention of all of his brothers.

He types and types, waits for ten seconds for a response and types and types again—smile on his face.

The Waynes didn’t need to be the greatest detectives in the world to know who he was texting.

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zylev-blog · 28 days

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The batkids decide to hop on the trend.

Dick, walking as Steph records: We’re vigilantes. Of course we have to be over dramatic.

(Cut to Nightwing back flipping off of Wayne tower)

Tim: were vigilantes. Of course we have issues with caffeine.

(Cut to a video of Tim as Red Robin snoring while hanging from a grappling line. Batman can be seen in the background facepalming.)

———

Damian: No.

Tim: oh come on, Robin, we’re all doing it.

Damian: I refuse to partake in such idiotic videos.

Tim: (while Damian is still behind him) We’re vigilantes. Of course we get to punch people without getting in trouble.

Damian: actually—-

Tim: Robin, you’re supposed to play along—

Damian: I am not going to spread false information—

Steph, interrupting: well, I’m not one of Batman’s sons so he legally can’t yell at me.

Tim: wanna bet?

(Cut to Batman scolding all three of them about the improper use of force)

—-

Duke: we’re vigilantes. Of course we go to Batburger.

(Cut to Duke happily eating a Batburger meal, and playing with a Signal toy)

Duke: what? I’m allowed to have hobbies.

——

Steph: we’re vigilantes. Of course we can scare anyone we want to. Right, Black Bat?

Cass: (nod)

(The next series of videos is a compilation. The first is Superman being scared, followed by Green Lantern, Flash, Cyborg, Starfire, Dick, Tim, and a failed attempt to startle Wonder Woman. Cass isn’t even upset about not being able to scare the woman, she accepts the defeat with grace.)

——-

Dick, Tim, and Steph: we’re vigilantes.

Dick: I’ve gotten stranded on the moon. Don’t ask.

Tim: I got lost in hell.

Steph: I accidentally followed Green Lantern into space.

Tim: what? When?

Steph: turns out if you hug a Green Lantern really tightly, their life support on their ring will support you too

Dick: yknow, Batman shouldn’t find out about this-

(Cut to Batman’s lecture about the proper use of protective gear when going to space)

——

Dick: we’re vigilantes. Of course we’re best friends with all of the villains.

(Cut to Red Hood kicking down a door)

Jason: hey (bleep), you’re late to dinner

Dick: (currently tied to a chair and gagged)

Jason: hang on, I’ll help. (Shoots everyone and unties dick) Harley said she’s going to rampage if you’re not there in five minutes.

Dick: Blame these guys, not me! (Jumps through the nearest window, shattering it, and the sound of a grapple is heard)

——

Jason: I’m a crime lord

Dick: and I’m a vigilante

Jason: and you’re ruining my video, (bleep) off. (Shoves Dick out of the frame, ignoring Dick’s muttered cursing) now that we got the riffraff out, let me start over. (Brushes imaginary dirt from hands) I’m a crime lord. Of course Batman fights me every other day. I look forward to the day I can break his kneecaps.

Dick: (shocked) Hood!

Jason: what?

Dick: he’s your dad too!

Jason: yuck, don’t remind me.

——-

Duke: we’re vigilantes. Of course we know all of the gossip. (Very obviously looking around) like for example, Superman has the biggest crush on Bruce Wayne—

Clark, who was obviously eavesdropping: Nonononononono—- (trying to turn the camera off as he darts into the frame. There’s a flash of red, blue and yellow as Duke and Clark fight over the camera)

——

Tim: we’re vigilantes. Of course we visit other cities.

Wally, as Kid Flash: What the (bleep) are you doing in Central City?

Tim: I’m honestly not sure, it’s so bright that I think I’m blind.

#batman #batkids #batfamily #batfam #tiktok reference #Superman #kid flash #Red Robin #signal #black bat #red hood #red hood is part of the Batfamily #Batman is an overprotective parent #batgirl

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andromarche · 4 months

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Hear me out, whenever one of the batlings does something good/bad, Bruce responds accordingly by changing his last will and testament. Most of them don’t even need or care about the money/company/manor, but they treat it in the same way young kids treat a sticker chart.

The batkids regularly break into Bruce’s lawyers office to check if they got any more stickers and forge the will so they get a bigger cut (more stickers). Bruce’s lawyer regularly returns to their office in the morning to papers and ink everywhere, and batarangs lodged in the side of the desk.

The lawyer thinks Bruce is just very fickle. Like this is BRUCIE WAYNE we’re talking about. He’s said on the record that he thinks the moon is made of cheese, he writes his signature with a cute little heart next to it. Very loveable. Not the brightest or most likely to think hard about the long term. They’re convinced the frequent and glaringly obvious Batman/Robin break ins is because Batman is one of Brucie Wayne’s kids and wants to keep checking he’s in the will.

•••

Tim: *mentions off-hand that he’s been awake for 48hours on 12 straight black coffees and sheer-will*

Bruce: *furiously calling his lawyer to cut Tim out of his will and leave the company to Jason*

•••

Lawyer: *holding the coffee pot to head back to their desk, to see Nightwing riffling through the drawers*

Lawyer:

Nightwing: *takes the entire coffee pot and pours it into his mouth, not breaking eye contact*

Lawyer: *sigh* Top drawer, right side. Had to move it because Robin spilled ink in the other drawer last night.

Nightwing: *devious grin, writing out “I leave my entire fortune, company and properties to Richard Grayson-Wayne. To my son, Damian Wayne, I leave one penny. To all of my other children, I leave a crisp $20 bill and this message ‘divide it amongst yourselves’.” And perfectly forging Brucie’s signature, complete with a heart next to the name.*

•••

Tim: B! B! What’s this I hear about you leaving us all a $20???

Steph: I DIDNT GET LEFT ANYTHING

Bruce, knows he explicitly mentioned Steph in his will: Oh well, since you didn’t want to be legally adopted-

Steph: IM EMOTIONALLY AND FINANCIALLY ADOPTED. I CLAIM SQUATTER’S RIGHTS.

Dick, knowing he changed it last night before Steph’s weekly snoop of the will: On… this family?

Steph: NO JUST THE WILL! ITS ABOUT THE PRINCIPLE.

•••

Lawyer, upon seeing Brucie Wayne for the third time this week to change his will: So, who did what this week? Was it Batman again?

Bruce: What?

Lawyer: Don’t worry, I’m not going to rat out that Batman is your kid.

Bruce: Right, thank you. I appreciate it.

Lawyer: *thinking more about Bruce’s high public profile and how judgemental Gotham’s high society can be than the vigilante stuff* I can’t imagine how hard it must have been to become a father so young. You must have still been in high school!

Bruce, confused and committed to the bit: Yeah, me and his mother still speak sometimes. He keeps getting annoyed by his brothers taking the car out for joyrides.

Lawyer: I hear ya, my eldest just started driving, she loves it though and keeps taking the car to Metropolis randomly.

#batman #batfamily #tim drake #bruce wayne #jason todd #dick grayson #damian wayne #red robin #dc universe #dcu #robin #red hood #nightwing #batfam #No it does not matter that Tim is already the CEO.#yes jason is legally dead here #yes jason does show up to next board meeting

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fangirl-dot-com · 1 month

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Incorrect Quotes - Part 2

All of these were taken from Pinterest - again, I am not this funny

Special thank you to @sinfully-yoursss for asking for another one!

Max: Do you ever do anything except whine like a little bitch? Y/n: Sometimes I whine like a BIG bitch

Arthur (propping his feet up on a table): So, I heard you like bad boys Y/n: What? No??? Arthur (immediately taking his feet off the table): Oh thank God, that felt terrible

Christian: Where’s Y/n and the child? Toto: Y/n is teaching him how to drive Christian: Y/n never learned to drive??????

*Meanwhile*

Y/n: So there’s two pedals. Sometimes three but you can ignore the left one Kimi: I don’t think…. Y/n: the lines on the road are more like suggestions than anything, like the speed limit Kimi: Are you positive that… Y/n: I’m not sure how to turn on the blinkers. Ready? Kimi: Uhhhhh Y/n (shouting): GO GO GO GO Kimi (screaming) *floors it*

Nurse: I’m sorry sir, we can only allow family to see Miss L/n at this time Christian: bold of you to assume I won’t legally adopt her right now Y/n (sleepy, inside the hospital wing): you tell ‘em dad!

Max: Your honor, my client is ready Judge: And what does the defendant plead? Max (mouthing the words): not guilty Y/n (squinting at Max): hot milky Max (facepalms): take her away

Y/n: Deck the halls with crippling depression Charles: Fa la la la la, la la la la Y/n: ‘Tis the season for emotional suppression Arthur: Fa la la la la, la la la la Max (passing through): what???

Y/n (on the phone): Hey Lance, can Arthur and I borrow $5000? Lance: Why the hell do you need $5000?! Y/n: For an escape room. Lance: What kind of escape room costs 5 grand?? Y/n: Y/n: Jail.

Max (answers phone): hello? Y/n: It’s Y/n Max: What did she do this time Y/n: no, it’s me, Max Max: what did you do this time

Y/n (on the floor): Go on…without me! Lando (crying while kneeling beside her): No! We can get through this together, just like we always do! Y/n: There’s no time! You must defend our honor. Don’t let my death be for nothing! Lando (sobbing): I can’t do this without you! Y/n: Goodbye, old friend….(goes limp) Oscar (whispering to Max): They do realize this is just a dodgeball game, right? Max (aiming at Lando): Oscar, this is war. Show no mercy.

Oscar: One day, someone will think about you for the last time in eternity. You will be forgotten by the world Y/n: not if I eat the Mona Lisa

Yuki: I’m small but knowing Y/n: You don’t be knowing what the top shelf looks like Yuki: Y/n: Yuki: Bitch

Y/n: Go big or go home! Vito (tears in his eyes): I am begging you, Y/n. For once in your life, go home. Just this once. Go. Home. Y/n: I’m gonna go big

Y/n: I will do a lot of thing. But admitting I’m cold to Max after he told me to bring a jacket isn’t one of them

Max: I sleep with a knife beside my bed Carlos: I have a machete under my bed Logan: I have a gun under my pillow Arthur: Weak. Pathetic. All of you Max: And what deadly weapon do you sleep with? Arthur (putting on shades): Y/n

Arthur: I will speak French between your legs Y/n: That is the hottest thing I’ve ever been told Lando: I’m just imagining someone screaming “Bonjour” to a dick Daniel: SACRE BLEAU MADEMOISELLE HON HON HON TITTY CROISSANTS Logan (wheezing): TITTY CROISANTS Max: None of you should ever be having sex

Y/n: Hey do you know anyone who can teach me how to play the trumpet? Alex: Why? Y/n: I wanna wander around the paddock and annoy Esteban Logan: Technically, you don’t actually need to know how to play it for that Y/n: You have opened my eyes Logan

Max (not looking up from his book): what did he do now? Y/n: HE SMILED Max: At you? Y/n: No, at Oscar and Ollie but HE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGEL Max: go away Y/n: shut up, I watched you pine over Charles for months – let me have this Max: carry on

Arthur: I came up with a brilliant idea for a prank Y/n: Ooh, what is it? Arthur: We should kiss. Y/n: …I don’t get it Arthur: Think about it! Imagine Max and Charles come into the garage, only to find us making out, hands all over each other. You can sit in my lap and we’ll really just go to town. Max will be like “WHAAAAAAA” and Charles might even faint! Y/n: Oh, that’s hilarious! We totally should

Esteban: The math problem isn’t so hard, it’s just a simple repetition of- Y/n (frustrated): You’re a simple repetition Esteban: Y/n: Charles: Did Y/n really just hurt Esteban’s feelings Max: I’m so freakin proud

Y/n (googling): snake bite leg what to do Google: elevate and apply pressure Y/n (lifting the snake really high): apologize or else

Y/n: with all due respect Y/n: Y/n: which is none

Toto: If you took a shot for every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be? Kimi: Maybe a little tipsy? George: Drunk. Y/n: Wasted. Lewis: Dead.

Esteban: Could you at least try to be nice? Y/n: You’re still breathing. That’s me being nice.

Oscar: Hey do you have a bag I can borrow? Zhou: The only bags I have are the ones under my eyes, and they’re specifically designed to carry the burden of my existence Oscar: Literally all you had to do was say no

Max (at Y/n’s funeral): Can I have a moment alone with her? Arthur: Of course *leaves* Max (leaning over the coffin): Now listen, I know you’re not dead Y/n: no duh

Y/n: Ow! Oscar: You dislocated your shoulder. Want me to pop it back in? Y/n (grimacing): Yeah…okay Oscar: All right, on 3….0, 1 *pops shoulder back in* Y/n: MOTHERFU- WHO THE HELL STARTS AT 0

Yuki: Hey Y/n, did you eat all the powdered donuts? Y/n: …No? Yuki: Then what’s that white powder on your pants Y/n (panicking): cocaine

Y/n: Max, I think you should play the role of my father Max: I don’t want to be your father Y/n: That’s perfect. You already know your lines

Lando: Can I be frank with you guys? Y/n: I don’t know how changing your name is going to help us here, but sure? Charles: Wait, can I still be Charles? Oscar: Shh, let Frank speak.

Lewis: I have a bad feeling about this. Y/n: What do you mean? Lewis: Don’t you ever have that little voice in your head that tells you if something is going to get you in trouble? Y/n: no Lewis: That explains so much

Y/n: What do you call a fish with no eye (i)? Oscar (not looking up from his book): myxine circifrons Y/n: Y/n: fsh

George: Do you have any skeletons in your closet? Y/n: Figuratively or literally? George: Y/n, honestly, the fact that I have to specify

Mitch: I know you took the last Red Bull Y/n Y/n (internally): play dumb Y/n: Who’s Y/n? Y/n (internally): not that dumb!

Y/n: Big mood Fernando: What does that mean…big mood? Y/n: Uh well, it kind of means like, me too, I guess Fernando: Thanks

*1 week later before a race in the rain*

Oscar: I’m kind of worried about this race guys Fernando: Big mood, Piastri, big mood Oscar: Y/n what did you do?

Charles: What’s worse than a DNF at a home race? Y/n: realizing that dragons can’t blow out their birthday candles Charles: Charles: mate

Y/n: You know what? Underneath it all, you’re actually quite nice Max: Repeat that disgusting slander and you’ll be hearing from my lawyers

Carlos: Now that I have explained the answer to this problem to you for ten minutes, do you understand? Y/n: Yes. Carlos:…Are you lying to me? Y/n: Yes.

Christian: Y/n, it’s your turn to give the pre-race talk Y/n (claps hands): Fuck shit up, hit some barriers, run Charles off the road, don’t die Max (proudly): succinct and informative

Max: The FIA really seems to hate us Charles: Maybe they’re homophobic Max: We’re not a couple Charles Charles: We’re not Y/n: You’re not?

Vito: Why is Y/n in the bathroom on the floor crying? Max: She’s drunk Vito: And? Mitch: She heard that Arthur has a girlfriend Vito:…but she is Arthur’s girlfriend Max: Yeah, we know that

Max (wears lighter skinny jeans and a brighter blue Red Bull polo) Y/n: I see you’re busting out the spring colors

Oscar: How do you two normally get out of these types of messes? Lando: We don’t. Y/n: We just make a bigger mess that cancels out the first one

*Valentines Day*

Arthur (reading Y/n’s texts): Y/n just said she’s going to give me 102 minutes of pleasure tonight Max: Oh wow

*Later watching Cars 2*

Y/n: You look disappointed

Y/n: Chillax! Oscar: that’s not a word Y/n: Sometimes the ones who deny “chillax” are the ones who need to chillax the most

Y/n: You know, water is pretty crazy. It can boil you to death, freeze you to death, drown you, or spin your car out of control, throw you into the barriers and kill you. But you still need it to survive Max: Y/n, I love you, but its 3 AM

Christian: Y/n, a word. Y/n: BALLOON

Max: I have the sharpest memory! Name one time I forgot something Y/n: You left Charles in a Walmart like three weeks ago Max: I did that on purpose, try again

Vito: Y/n isn’t answering her phone Arthur: I’ll call Vito: Max and I have both tried, along with everyone else on the grid. What make you think she’ll answer? *Calls her anyway* Y/n: Hello?

Y/n: Oi, where’s your boyfriend? Max: Who? Y/n: Charles, where is he? Max: He’s not my boyfriend Y/n: Have you told him that?

Fan: Max, what motivates you? Max: My ambition and desire to push forward no matter what Fan: Y/n, what about you? Y/n: An unhealthy mix of spite, pettiness, the thirst for vengeance, and pure, relentless rage. That and a Red Bull in the morning

TAG LIST: @fionaschicken @glitterquadricorn @laura-naruto-fan1998 @treehouse-mouse @sam-is-lost @kagatinkita @fangirl125reader @megatrilss1885 @myxticmoon @angsthology @cmleitora @fly-me-away @graciewrote @ashy-kit @slutofmultifandom @aexitizen-ln4 @sugarvibez @vellicora @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @33-81 @hoetel-manager @xcharlottemikaelsonx @jayda12 @ilove-tswizzle @justme2042 @itsjustkhaos @nikfigueiredo @stopeatread @cha-hot @sadg3 @iloveyou3000morgan @s4turnsl0ver @alessioayla @torchbearerkyle @leptitlu @awekbachira @shreks-sugar-daddy @v1naco @stan-josie @mellowarcadefun @badassturtle13 @beskardroids @callisposts @poppyalice2001 @juniper-july19 @lizzypiastri

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negansbackdoorwhore · 7 months

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Scrimmage

Summary: Negan coaches college ball for a small community college. One of his players however keeps up a little game that he is tired of playing

Warnings: swearing, age gap (early 20s reader, Negan is mid 40s), smut, p in v sex, daddy kink

Negans POV

There she goes again, purposely wearing those fucking short shorts. They hugged those thighs tights and made her ass pop. Fuck, what I’d do to her if she was mine for one night. But I can’t risk my fucking job over pussy. I try to ignore the way she sways her hips when walking past me and how she’s able to be a star during practice. There is no denying that most of these girls are crushing on me but Y/N just has to make her desires known in a more outlandish way. She was by no means shy about the attraction, sometimes I would slip up a flirty comment to amuse her game. But never actually go to touch her or anything stepping over that boundary.

Tonight was a scrimmage game to see how well we are prepared for the season. Along with to see what we need to practice on. As the game went on, a few students watched in the gym and I focus on different plays.

“C’mon girls! Defense, defense!” I call out and blow the whistle for a quick time out. They came over to the side line and gather in a circle.

“We’re doing great so far, but defense needs work. It doesn’t really work out well if we can’t keep the opposing team off our dick, right?” They laugh at my joke and nodded in agreement. I blew my whistle once more to set off the game again. Much improvement in our team and I shout out my criticism and let them finish out the last quarter as champs. We had a little get together after they showered up in the cafeteria. Apparently, there was a little froyo social, bullshit that college campus’s do. I snuck away as the girls started talking whatever girl language they do. Hopefully, they have fun tonight. I sigh and walk back to the gym to gather my stuff to go home. As I unlocked the gym door, I go to my office and flip the light switch.

“What are you doing here?” I sigh looking at Y/N on my desk, her legs are crossed. “Not much. Just waiting for you…Daddy.” I hissed as I heard that nickname and shook it off. I move pass her and grab my duffle bag.

“Get out of here and go to that gay froyo social.” I say making sure all my things are in my bag. I then heard movement around and hoping she left. But instead heard the locking of the door.

“Y/N. I’m telling you one more time, leave.” I say in a stern tone and remove my hat. I run my fingers through my hair as I turn off my computer.

“Am I not attractive?” The question made me turn my head towards her. “You are very attractive, Y/N.” I say throwing my bag on my shoulder.

“Am I not your type?” She keeps on asking and trying to trap me. “I don’t have a type.” I say trying to dismiss her. “Then what is it? I’m twenty one, so it’s legal and I’ve caught you staring at me numerous times…” She says reaching to touch me but I dodge the advance.

“This is inappropriate and you know it.” I say going to unlock the door and then heard her let out a dramatic sigh. “I see how it is. Coach Smith is just too scared.” I gripped the door handle tight, I knew exactly what she was trying to do. I just shook my head and unlocked the door to make my leave. “Fine. Run away like a coward.” I heard her say in a disappointed tone.

Another week passed and I was grading the last few exams. I hated graded these papers especially since I’m supposed to be hands on. But can’t be so lucky as the curriculum calls for state testing and at least a few tests to exercise their brains. I sigh feeling bored already and sip the coffee from my thermos. It was late evening as I got stuck here. I did however procrastinate my duties, I had a couple dates with a few faculty members. Unfortunately, they were boring and even worse no pussy either. I growl under my breath and felt it was too long since I’ve felt the warmth of a woman. Two long months and not getting my dick wet. I lean back in my office chair and ran a hand over my chin. As I took a break, I heard some noise outside of my office. It sounded like some stupid kids finding the empty gym to fuck. I would leave it alone but hearing some guy get lucky instead of me, just pisses me off. I go to stand up and open my door to see some frat boy with Y/N.

“Shit! You fucking lied to me!”

“Hey! I didn’t know he was still here.” She retaliated and I was fucking furious. For one, she was here with this idiot and the other thing was that she intended to let another person have her.

“That’s no way to speak to a lady. Now, I’ll give you two options. One, you can leave and I won’t do a fucking thing. Two, I’ll suspend you and fail your sorry ass.” I say looking at them both. I scowl at Y/N to make her feel how angry I was.

“Fine. I’m out of here.” He walked away quickly and Y/N was shooting daggers at me. “Thanks a lot! I was trying to have fun but I can’t get that when you’re around.” I shook my head and grabbed her wrist. “I’m so sick and tired of your ass. You need someone to fuck you? Fine, I’ll change your fucking life.”

She didn’t put up any physical protest or verbal as I lead us to my office. I could practically feel her excitement as I push further inside and lock the door.

“Get your ass on the desk.” I say removing my cap and see her immediately jump to my orders. I smile to myself seeing how happy she was, I was too. Finally get to feel that tight cunt on me along with her ass. I bit my lip and approach the desk. Her thighs opened for my body to fit and instantly my lips were on hers. I held her by the waist as I leaned down to deepen our kiss. Fuck, they were so soft and tasted like honey. I groan into her mouth and felt her hips buck. I grin against her lips as I felt her thighs going around my waist.

“Eager?” I teased her and grind against her, she let out a cute whimper to feel my semi erect cock. I bit my lip and moved to bite her neck. Her skin tasted just as good as I sucked a dark hickey on her bare neck. Want everyone to see that she’s owned by me. And me alone. I growl as I move lower and felt her body through the thin shirt.

“Fuck. Coach.”

“Not coach. Negan or Daddy, either one is fine as long as you scream it.” I heard her breath get heavy at the statement and took the opportunity to kneel down. Y/N looked down at me, all that cockiness she had was out the window. It turned me on even more, seeing her slick mouth shut and her actions were all shy. All because I have her trapped under my grasp. Her limbs were trembling as I had my head between her thighs. I bit my lip looking at her turn red.

“Someone getting cold feet?” I teased as I reach to tug away her shorts. She tensed instantly and almost pushed me away. I look up at her and stopped my hands from going further. I can read how nervous she was to do this and pecked my lips on her knee.

“It’s okay. Just relax baby, Daddy won’t hurt you.” I coo as I gently massage her calf. I move to stand up and moved my hand up from her leg toward her chin. I held her cheek gently in my hand as my thumb swept along her skin. She was still flushed and I saw how she wanted to hide from my gaze.

“And I thought you’d be more fiesty. Guess that was all bullshit, but don’t worry. I know how to treat a fine piece of ass.” I kiss her again but this time, softer and more attentive. She moaned against me and I reached my hand lower to touch the front of her shorts. Her thighs daring to close but I stop the resistance. “Be a good girl. Let me touch your pussy.” I purred and her muscles slowly untensed. I caressed her through her shorts and felt her hips buck.

“Mm baby. You like that?” I say pressing harder and kissing the mark I left. She only nodded and I bit down on that spot, making her let out a wince.

“Use your fucking words.” I warned. “Yes, I like it.” She whined feeling my hand go beneath the fabric. I felt the little damp spot on her panties making me growl. Fuck, I barely even touched her. I could feel the excitement in her body after making such a noise. I go by her ear and nibbled her earlobe as I growl again. She let out a moan this time as my finger teased her clit.

“Negan, it feels-“

“Oh yeah. Tell me baby, tell me how I feel.” Y/N moaned and went to hide her face in my chest. Her hands reached to grip onto my sweatshirt. I laughed lightly and shoved her panties away. I moaned at the warmth of her nectar hit my skin. I felt her erect clit practically twitch against my touch. Her body clings to me as I finger her dripping cunt. Her noises were muffled into the fabric of my sweatshirt and I kissed the top of her head. Her thighs dared to shut. Damn, she must be close.

“Don’t do that. Be a good girl and let me make you come.” I say against her ear and felt her pussy clenching on my fingers. “Daddy!” She squealed into my chest as I felt her come. I groan feeling her sweet juices coat my hand and brought her into another kiss. I groan and pulled away to take off my shirt. I heard Y/N catching her breath and guided her hand on the buldge of my sweatpants.

“It’s big…” She said in a shaky tone but I reassured her motions and pulled down the waistband. My cock sprung out almost hitting poor Y/N in the face. She visibly shook at the sight of me.

“Don’t worry about putting it in your mouth. We’ll do that another time, for now…” I take her hand and had her touch my shaft. Fuck, her skin was soft and warm. “Just play with it. Get a good feel for me, sweetheart.” Her palm gently went down my cock and back up. She was still shaking but it only made me twitch in her hand.

“Don’t be scared to get a little rough. Go on and give a firm squeeze.” I instructed and she obeyed immediately. I bit my lip feeling her slowly jerk me off. “Oh shit. That’s a good girl.” I praised and see her body language change, she must like that. I smirk to myself and go to stroke her hair. “You want to be my good girl, don’t you?” I asked and gently massaged her scalp. Y/N let out a light sigh at my attention and it encouraged her to go faster. I moan and starting to buck my hips against her. Her grip grew tighter as I felt her.

“Shit. This is making Daddy feel so fucking good.” I smile and brought my hand to lift up her chin up at me. Her eyes were full of desire and I wanted to fill that need. Along with her pussy.

“Behind? Or do you want to face me?”

“What?” She asked and I laughed lightly at her question and squeezed her chin. “How should I fuck you? Behind or do you want look at me?”

“Can I look at you?” She says in a hesitant tone and I gently push away her hand off my cock. I lean over her and kissed her lips as tugged for her shorts to come off. Her hips lifted up and I quickly toss them onto the floor. She shivered feeling the cool touch of my wooden desk as my hands brought her legs to my waist.

“Like this?” I ask knowing fully well how embarrassed she was having me doing this to her. Her cheeks were flushed and her thighs tensed. “Hold on to me, I want to feel you scratch my body as I make you all fucking mine.”

“Yes Daddy.” She whispered and I felt my cock turning to steel. Y/N’s arms go around my shoulders and I lean lower to guide my body to tease her wet slit. I groan at the feeling and heard her let out a moan. I bit my lip and eased the tip inside. She was already squeezing me and I go deeper watching her expression closely.

“Relax for me.” I whispered and stopped my movements feeling her clenching harder. Her nails scratched my shoulder and eventually her velvet walls relaxed.

“I’m sorry. I’ve never felt someone this big.” She winced gently moving her hips up making me moan. I took the opportunity to go all the way inside and moaned at how good she felt.

“Fuck. Tight little pussy on you, feels so fucking good on me.” I moan slowly moving my hips as she whimpered to feel me stretching her cunt. I reached my hand to hold her hip as I kept my thrusts slow to make sure she was adjusting to my size. I was really giving her the special treatment, might as well savor this. I lean closer to her face and kissed her softly. She moaned on my lips and I moved up for her legs to go onto my shoulders. She let out a surprised noise as her back landed onto the papers on the desk. I could careless about that shit right now.

“Oh Y/N.” I groan as I move inside of her as her cunt started overflowing with her sweet juices. Her hold grew tight on me as I started to pound her into the desk. I couldn’t hold myself back, it felt too fucking good.

“Fuck! Daddy!” She whined as my hips seem to have control over me. Well fuck, I think I might be in love with her cunt. “Good girl, letting me have you like this.” I groaned feeling her clench down on my cock.

I growled as those perfect manicured nails dug into my skin and I pumped my cum deep inside this perfect pussy. I moan and dug deep to hit that special spot and watched her mouth hung open. Her eyes shut and tears roll down her cheeks. Fucking fuck fuck fuck! This might’ve been a mistake….

#jeffrey dean morgan x reader #jeffrey dean morgan #negan x reader #negan smith #negan fic #negan #negan smith x reader #coach negan #negan au #negan smut

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igotanidea · 11 months

Text

For his eyes only: Jason Todd x fem!reader x Dick Grayson preview

MINORS DNI!!!!!!! I'M SERIOUS!!!! IT'S HEAVY MATURE CONTENT AND I SWEAR IF YOU ARE UNDER LEGAL AGE AND INTERACT WITH THAT I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN!

Seriously, I got so much fluff and angst on my blog, go check out sth else.

AS FOR THE REST: Let me know if you want more of this, cause damn my mind right now..... 🥵🥵🥵🥵

***

„Jay…..” she called him, swaying her hips left and right in that seductive way that always got her his undivided attention. Jason was currently splayed on the sofa, reading a book, but the second he saw her coming from the other side of the room he tossed it away, smirking knowingly.

“what is it princess?” he propped himself on the elbow, eyes fixed solely on her figure, her leggings leaving very little to the imagination “got something for me?”

“Mhm…..” she muttered, straddling his hips, hands locking on his neck, while his own found a way to her waist, gripping her tightly “I got a …. Proposition.”

“I like how that sounds. Keep talking baby…..”

“I’ve been thinking about …. Well, spicing things up in the bedroom.”

“Now I most definitely like how that sounds. Shall we start now?” his right hand travelled down, an started palming her ass.

“Why can’t you just let me finish, Jaybrid?” she grinded on him a bit, which got her a groan “’At least one of us should be able to keep it in the pants, don’t you think?” Y/N whispered into his ear, moving a bit more.

“I….. what do you need?” he hissed though clenched teeth, fighting the urge to just throw her on her back and have his way with her

“I want a threesome….” She whispered and fuck, he was hard before but now…. now he started burning up. Who would have thought that his little girl would suggest something like this? And to think that when they started dating she was all vanilla, scared of anything to crazy. Apparently, his lust, sex drive and explorer vain finally rubbed off on her. He created a monster and he loved that.

“God, can you say that again?” he panted, breath fastened. “that’s so hot coming from your mouth”

“Let’s explore something new, Jace….”

“Fuck, yes, you already got me.” He sat up looking straight into her eyes. “so…. you, me and Roy?”

“I was rather thinking about someone else….” She tangled fingers in his hair, massaging his scalp and tugging on the roots in that way he liked so much “someone, in your own playground.”

“What?” he frowned, but then the realization dawned on him “NO!”

“Jace….”

“I said no. fuck no. I am not sharing you with my fucking older brother.’

“But sharing me with Roy was completely fine.”

“those are two different things!”

“How so?”

“Dick is …. Is ….”

“What, baby?” she cooed “are you scared of a little competition? Cause Jay, believe me, I’m just curious about what it would be like to have both Nightwing and Red Hood. Wonder which one of you is a boss in the bed…..” she tapped her chin and he used that moment to trap her underneath him.

“I’m not scared of him! And you should know that the only one who can contain your slutty attitude is me” he kissed her hungrily, her back arching into him, before she realized the game Jay was playing and pushed him off

“Does this mean you agree?” she smiled absolutely innocently ”Please, baby. I’ll wear that little red lacy thing you like so much….”

“So he can admire you in that?” he hissed

“No baby, of course not.” her eyes sparkled dangerously, filled with lust and mischief “so you can take it off me before his very eyes. To leave Dick desperate, whiny, jealous….”

“Fuck…” Jason felt himself getting harder at the mere thought of killing two birds with one stone. Having her and torturing Grayson? He truly did not deserve the angel Y/N was being. “Just tell me when and where and it better be quick, cause otherwise babe, I’m gonna take you right here, right now. “

#jason todd fanfiction #jason todd imagine #jason todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd x fem!reader #jason todd x oc #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #red hood fanfiction #red hood imagine #red hood x reader #red hood x fem!reader #red hood #red hood x y/n #jason todd smut #nightwing x reader #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson smut #nightwing smut

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xxsabitoxx · 1 year

Text

Experience

Kishibe x Fem! Reader

Warnings: large age gap (reader is in her 20s but it’s unspecified) and Kishibe is 50, car sex, hand job, degrading, praising, smoking

A/N: this was meant to be a short 1-1.5k Drabble but it turned into a mini smut instead (my brain is weird so some of y’all may still consider this a Drabble or you may consider it a full fic… idk man) anywho here he is :)

Word count: 2.6k

“You… you can’t be serious, oneechan.” Denji was staring at you with an udon noodle hanging between his lips. You chuckled at Denji’s constant use of calling you “big sis” — Aki had reprimanded him forever ago about using formalities with you. You had told him senpai was far too much and that calling you oneechan was fine. Still, it made you chuckle that it was the only nickname he ever stuck too with no bribery needed. Aki still used the gum tactic to get Power and Denji to use the correct terms while addressing him.

“I am serious.” The smile never left your face, watching as Denji slurped his noodle the rest of the way. “But why? He’s so old! Hell he’s over half your age! Ain’t he like 50 or something? And you’re like 20-something? I doubt he can even get his dick hard!” You rolled your eyes, laughter bubbling in your chest as Denji’s clear shock at your crush on his mentor. You’d known Kishibe since you joined public safety a few years prior, having worked alongside Aki when it came to training under the man’s brutal regime.

“Oh I doubt that. Kishibe is a man of experience, he probably has over 30 years worth with women.” Denji still couldn’t see how that would appeal to you, if anything he thought it should be a turn off. “That’s 30 years of use. You’ll probably catch a disease.” At that you couldn’t help but snort, putting your cigarette to your lips and inhaling. “Just think about it for a second, Denji. Wouldn't you want a woman that knows what she’s doing? One that would know how to take care of you?”

“I mean yeah, but maybe a woman that’s only a couple years older than me. You’re going after a man that was well into adulthood by the time you were born.” You shook your head, finding it rather funny that Denji was seemingly peeved by this. “That’s real bold coming from you, Denji-kun.” The blonde quirked his eyebrow, eyeing you suspiciously as he went in for yet another helping. “You and your crush on Makima? The fact that she seems to reciprocate your advances? Kinda a similar situation… but mine is legal.”

You shrugged your shoulders, blowing the smoke you had inhaled. “Yah, whatever… go for your creepy old man then.” He stuck his tongue out as you rolled your eyes, a victorious smile still present on your lips. “No really…” he drawled softly “he’s right there.” You froze, head whipping around to the direction Denji had motioned to. Sure enough, Kishibe was sitting at the bar, a glass of whisky in front of him… typical. You turned back to Denji, utterly mortified. “You don’t think he heard us, do you?” The blonde shrugged, a shit eating grin creeping up his face.

“Denji!” You whisper yelled this time, face growing warm. “Huh?” He spoke a little louder than necessary “I don’t think he heard? What’s the big deal anyways? Ain’t you want him to know? So you can like…actually do something about ya crush?” He drawled loudly, enough to draw a few wandering eyes to your table. “N-not the point! Shut up!” You were snuffing out your cigarettes on the underside of the table seconds later, ready to make a quick escape before Kishibe could even notice you there.

The problem being, you knew your old mentor fairly well. It was more than likely that he was already aware of your presence. Not only that but you were nearly positive he’d probably heard you and Denji talking about him. You wouldn’t be able to escape him unless you put a conscious effort into sneaking out of here. Even then, he’d find a way to corner you and ask you what the hell was going on. “Eh, whatever oneechan… at least I have the guts to go for the people I like.” Now you knew you were done for.

If Denji was going to make this a game of confidence, you’d have to do your “big sister” duties and simply one up him. “You’re a pain in my ass.” You scoffed, watching the grin return to the blonde’s face as you pushed your chair out. “You can thank me later.” Was all he said, returning to his udon as you made your way to the bar. “Captain Kishibe.” You fought to keep your voice steady. Kishibe turned to look at you, the usual stoic expression on his face.

“Come to talk to the creepy old man sitting alone at the bar?” He chimed softly, watching your face morph into embarrassment as he confirmed your biggest fear. He heard everything you and Denji had said. “Blame blondey over there for that nickname. Guessing that if you heard what Denji had to say you also heard what I had to say.” Your arms clasped behind your back, fidgeting with your fingers nervously as you waited for him to speak.

Kishibe swirled his glass around, watching the amber liquid slosh before he brought it to his lips and downed the rest. “Oh, I did. Not that I’m shocked… you’re far more transparent with your emotions than you think you are, y/n.” You could have melted on the spot, seeped straight into the floorboards and disappeared forever. Instead, you shifted your weight from foot to foot, willing yourself to grow some confidence and test the waters. It didn’t seem he was necessarily shutting you down just yet.

“Well… I guess this was a pretty lame ass way of saying I have a thing for my old mentor.” Kishibe leaned back, eyes shutting briefly as he inhaled through his nose. “You’re just looking for someone to show you a good time. Tell me, have you ever actually enjoyed any of the men you’ve slept with?” His eyes opened and he turned to face you fully now, tapping the wooden top of the bar twice to signal that he was ready to pay his tab. “Truthfully, no.” A breathy chuckle left him, one that sent shivers down your spine.

“I see. I guess that would make it my duty, Hmm? Your old mentor has to show you the ropes… show you the good from the bad. A private lesson, if you would.” You didn’t quite know how to react, your brain working in overdrive to try and process the words he had just spoken. “S-so you’re saying you’ll…” you flinched at your own stutter, watching Kishibe eye you carefully. “That I’ll show you how a man properly satisfies a lady? Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying, Sugar.” Your heart jumped at the nickname.

You found it hard to speak, instead you kept your mouth shut and watched your old mentor pay his tab before grabbing his coat off the back of his chair. “I paid for the fool’s meal as well as yours, he’ll get home on his own just fine. Let’s go.” Kishibe was heading towards the door, you waited till he was facing away to shoot Denji a look. The blonde seemed a bit awestruck that you were already leaving with him, you just shrugged as you left. You’d probably have to apologize the next time you saw him.

Before you knew it you were slipping into the passenger side of Kishibe’s car, thanking him softly for opening and closing the door for you. He slipped on the other side a moment later, turning the key so the engine roared to life. “I didn’t think you were the car type.” You commented softly, eyes scanning the amount of gadgets that littered the dashboard. The car’s interior was all black leather, that was at least something you expected from him.

“I’m not but the holiday bonus was nice and I needed an upgrade anyways.” He cracked his window, lighting up a cigarette before pulling out of the restaurant’s small lot and out into the bustling street. You didn’t expect him to be nervous, nor did you expect him to be awkward about the situation. Yet you were practically squirming in your seat, hoping he’d show some sort of nervousness to help you feel less inexperienced.

His cigarette hung half hazardously from his lips, one hand on the wheel while the other came down to rest on your thigh. You nearly choked on your own saliva, heat pooling in your gut at the simple action. “Amuse me, would you? What’s the best thing a guy has done for you, Hmm?” Smoke puffed out around his cigarette, eyes locked on the road as he waited for your response. “Offer to walk me home.” You admitted sheepishly, not quite sure how he’d react to such a lame response. It was true your taste in men hadn’t really benefited you in any way up until now.

He let out a gruff laugh, slowing down as he pulled up to a red light and plucked the cigarette from his lips. “That’s it? Seriously? Where the hell are you finding these bummy men?” You weren’t sure why his clear annoyance affected you the way it did, but you found yourself struggling to not press your thighs together. A small effort to relieve some of the ache, you knew if you moved your legs even a little he’d feel it. Then again, he was driving you back to his apartment to fuck you… would it really matter? “No need to be tense.” He murmured softly, hand squeezing your thigh.

“…’m not tense.” A stupid lie but it made him chuckle so you couldn’t really be mad at it. “Let me help you relax.” The cigarette was back between his lips, hand on the wheel as the light turned green. Kishibe pushed on your thigh, silently asking you to spread them. It took your brain a few seconds to properly respond, spreading them just enough that he could fit his hand between them. “Atta girl…” smoke puffed out around his lips once again, filling your nose in an almost intoxicating way. You were a bit shocked by the praise, nearly letting a whimper slip out.

The man you knew as your mentor was certainly not the same as the man sitting beside you. Then again you doubted he would ever woo the amount of women he did with his mentor attitude. Kishibe’s hand gingerly crept up your thigh before dipping between to cup your panty covered cunt. You mentally thanked yourself for wearing a skirt, giving the man in the driver's seat easy access to where you wanted him the most. He could feel your warmth radiating through the thin material, on top of that he could tell you were already wet.

Kishibe exhaled deeply, forcing himself to remain focused on the road even though he’d really like to look over and gauge your reaction. Truthfully, he had been waiting patiently for quite some time now for you to be the one to make the first move. He wasn’t lying when he said you were transparent with your emotions, but even then he didn’t want to risk creating awkward situations. He was getting old after all, a fifty year old man going for a woman in her twenties would certainly look terrible on his part if the other party didn’t reciprocate.

Maybe he was just a creepy old pervert for thinking that way.

Regardless, it was starting to get hard to ignore the persistent stiffness between his own legs. You’re breathing had hitched, suddenly dizzied by the fact that his hands were already on you. Two fingers pressed against the wetmark on your panties, drawing a sigh from your lips as he rubbed the material softly. “You’re more excited than you let on.” it was an off hand comment, one that had your fingers gripping the door handle to keep yourself grounded. Kishibe’s fingers slid along your slit, settling over your pulsing clit.

“You’ve said no man has ever satisfied you… I take it because he didn’t know where this was…” he pressed down, sending a shock of pleasure through you. Your mouth opened but nothing came out, slowly he began rubbing tentative circles, making sure you keep his fingers on the cloth of your panties. He wouldn’t let you feel his bare fingers just yet. More smoke puffed out, filling the car briefly before being sucked out the window. “I asked you a question, sugar.” you turned to look at him, face warm as his fingers continued to pleasure you. “T-that would be right…”

“Every woman is different, is this good for you?” you knew he was referring to his current action. “Y-yeah but…” you reached for his hand, placing yours over his as you guided him to a faster tempo. Kishibe took the reins again instantly, chuckling softly as you let out a soft moan. “Hmm, that better?” it was low, enough you send shivers through you as your hips jerked into his hand. “Need more…” you couldn’t quite figure out what specifically you needed, you just knew you needed more of him. “I know.” was all he said, fingers working you up continuously as he drove.

Part of you had to wonder if he was even driving you to his apartment at this point. It felt like you were going in circles around the city as he got you off in his front seat. Before you knew it, you felt your orgasm creeping up on you. “S-shit…” you clenched around nothing, the tension in your gut had appeared a lot quicker than usual. “You’re gonna cum, aren’t you?” he teased softly, fingers picking up speed ever so slightly. You mumbled out some sort of ‘yes’, gasping softly as the tension continued to build.

Maybe it was the combination of everything, Kishibe, his hand, the fact that he was doing this almost absentmindedly while driving through the city, everything was edging you on. “Then cum for me. Show me how much of a little slut you are. I mean really, you’re going to cum from me rubbing you through your panties. You’ll ruin them.” You whined at his words, the tension building so intensely that you were certain you’d fall apart. “Atta girl…cum for me” encouraged again, rolling to a stop at yet another red light.

He looked over at you know, the sudden motion causing you to turn to look at him. “C’mon… no need to hold back.” he sneered, the ghost of a smirk on his lips. You felt your lower lip tremble, head turning to look back at the road as your orgasm crashed down over you. Breathless gasps escaped your lips, hand shooting down to hold Kishibe’s wrist as he continued to work you through your ogasm. “…ough… enough…” you squeaked, overstimulation taking over as the light turned green.

He only slowed because of the light turning green, hand never retracting from where it was between your legs. “Here we are.” He commented offhand, pulling into the parking lot of his apartment building. You blinked, the throb already returning. “Hope you’re not worn out… I haven’t even gotten to show you a proper good time.” He pulled into a numbered space, shifting into park and plucking the nearly gone cigarette from his lips. You watched him put it out on an ashtray in his cup holder, turning the car off a moment later.

“Well?” You shivered as his hand pulled away, making you want to chase after him. “Y-yeah…I’m not worn out. Hell, after your training it’s hard to ever get worn out these days…captain.” You teased softly, not knowing where the confidence came from. A smile actually tugged at his lips, hand reaching for the door handle and pushing it open. “I’ll remember that, sugar.” For some reason, you felt as if you had just dug your own grave.

#chainsaw man #chainsaw man fanfiction #chainsaw man drabble #chainsaw man smut #csm fanfic #csm kishibe #chainsaw man kishibe #kishibe x y/n #master kishibe #captain kishibe #kishibe x reader #kishibe x you #kishibe smut #csm smut #xxsabitoxx’s work!

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steveharringtons-lover · 2 years

Text

Slurpys and Dirty Talk

Steve Harrington / Female Reader (she/her)

summary: After an accident you wake up in the hospital high on pain medication and say somethings you’ll reget when your sober.

warnings: mention of legal drug use, mention of smut, dirty talk, mention of injuries.

You can hear the sound of shushed voices around you as you slowly regain consciousness. You try to open your eyes but are met by a harsh light.

“She’s awake!” Dustin says loudly you feel as though your eardrums may burst.

“Sh! She’s clearly still a bit out of it!” Steve said firmly coming over to your side. “Had us worried their for a second Y/N.”

Your eyes finally adjust to the light and you get a good look at your surroundings, the white walls and beeping noise coming from the monitor gives it away.

“Am I in the hospital?” You ask, hoping one of the many people standing around your bed will answer.

“Sure are, you got knocked out.” Eddie answered clearly trying not to laugh.

“Come on let’s go get the kids, they’re dying to see you.” Robin said gesturing for Eddie and Nancy to come with her.

Moment later a doctor walked into the room, gave you a quick checkup, administered something for the pain and left.

“Here, I got you your favourite.” Steve said handing you a cherry slurpy. “Your gonna need to keep your fluids up.”

“Oh Steve, I love these. I kind of feel like I’m floating.” You say taking a sip, letting out a pleased moan.

You can’t help but smile as Steve’s jaw clenches at the sound.

“I think you’re a little bit out of it sweetheart, does your head hurt?” Steve asks you, but you couldn’t give one shit about your head right now.

“Sh it’s ok Stevie, I love my slurpy I’ll make it up to your later.” You say winking at him with a smirk on your face.

“Calm down love the kids will be here in a minute.” Steve says trying to get you to shut up, hoping to avoid an embarrassing situation.

“No it’s not fair pretty boy, you have to sit here with me. Watching me suck on this straw.” You smile up at him, your lips stained red.

“Alright calm down.” Steve says peaking his head out from the curtains around your bed to see if anyone is near.

“Oh! I know!” You say the most amazing idea ever coming to your head.

“Sh we’ll talk about this later baby.” Steve said trying to quiet you down before you say something he knows you’ll regret later.

“I’ll suck your dick!” You say eyes wide smiling. “I’ll suck your dick when we get home ok? Wait maybe in the car.”

“Alright thats enough.” Steve says his face turning red.

“No it’s not, your too good to me. Take your pants off and I’ll do it now. Quick!” You say grabbing for his belt.

The sound of the curtains being opened bought your attention over to the group.

Eddie and Robin looked as though they were about to burst out laughing.

Nancy looked extremely concerned, especially for the kids.

Said kids were left absolutely dumbfounded all their faces red.

“Oh my god.” Steve muttered under his breath who was the reddest of all. “How much did-“

“All of it.” Max said quickly cutting Steve off before he could even finish wash he was going to say.

“Oh no, does this mean I have to give them all the safe sex talk!” You say looking mortified and still unable to control your filter.

“Robin get me a banana and a condom!”

“Alright everyone out!” Nancy said hording the kids out of the room as quickly as possible.

Eddie and Robin were absolutely shitting themselves in the corner laughing.

Steve was too busy worrying he’d actually have to give the kids the birds and the bees talk.

————————————————————————

(check out my on-going Steve fanfic Off Limits! It’s gonna be smutty and slutty! And for those who are here because of that fanfic update is coming super soon!)

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington smut #steve harrington imagines #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve stranger things #steve harrington #steve Harrington fanfic #stranger things #Eddie Munson #robin buckley #nancy wheeler #max mayfield

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audhd-nightwing · 1 month

Text

au where selina adopts dick instead of bruce

- selina goes with bruce to the circus as a date

- when the Graysons fall, she knows bruce is reliving what happened to his parents

- she kisses bruce on the cheek and stealthily makes her way through the crowd to the youngest Grayson

- selina has always had motherly instincts, it’s why she has so many cats. she’s known for taking in strays, so what’s one more?

- she pulls dick into a hug and he melts into her, he just needs someone to hold him right now

- selina reminds dick of his mother- the same warm brown skin, the same tight embrace, both kissing the top of his head and whispering reassurances with a slightly accented voice

- she whisks him away from the police (she doesn’t trust them in general, let alone with a newly orphaned child) and lets bruce deal with the consequences. dick sits on her couch with a cat in his lap as selina introduces herself and explains everything to him

- dick is just glad he doesn’t have to go with the cops or social services (he knows not to trust them), and his gut is telling him he can trust selina. after all, animals are a great judge of character and all of the cats seem to love her

- bruce is aware selina took dick in, but considering how quickly the police give up looking for the boy, bruce doesn’t mind her essentially kidnapping him

(selina eventually becomes a foster parent and legally fosters dick, but it’s years later and the police/legal system don’t care enough to worry about a previously missing persons suddenly appearing as a foster kid. gotta love Gotham)

- dick is still young and angry and wants revenge on tony zucco. selina is honest about her identity as Catwoman, and he asks her to help him get back at the man who killed his parents

- together, they steal his most prized possessions, bankrupt him, and overall ruin his life, and then they hand him over to the cops with evidence of his crimes duct-taped to him

- dick is a natural at stealth, thanks to his acrobatic abilities, and he begs selina to train him. he wants to be like robin hood, stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, and who is selina to deny him that?

- selina will still steal jewels from museums and such for herself, but she does that solo. together, the two of them go after corrupt rich people and steal their money, distributing it to the poor

- dick teaches himself how to hack and is able to access bank accounts, making it much easier to steal large amounts of money. selina is extremely proud of him

- selina makes dick his own suit and he goes by Stray. he is typically the one to give out money to people on the streets, and he’s eventually known by most of Gotham. bruce carefully ignores this happening, because he recognizes that Stray is helping the people of Gotham in a way Batman can’t

- bruce still finds and adopts jason, but his costume and name are obviously not Robin. probably Batboy. anyway, dick hears about Batman’s new sidekick and immediately thinks “friend? potential friend?” so he follows them around and befriends jason

- jason knows about Stray, and has a slight hero worship of him ‘cuz he’s like robin hood!’ which dick (and selina) find adorable

(dick is about 10 when his parents die, 12 when he becomes Stray officially, and 16 when jason (13) becomes Batboy)

- tim, when he finds out about dick being fostered by selina kyle after being declared missing for years, of course goes to confront them. dick was (still is) his childhood hero, and he was so worried when the older boy was declared missing

- at least until he recognized dick as Stray, but he couldn’t exactly confront him then

- anyway so tim shows up at selina’s apartment and demands to see dick. selina is like “you are tiny, come inside” and calls for dick. it takes dick a moment but he recognizes tim and hugs him. tim clings to him and dick just accepts it

- tim gives him the photo they took together and some others he found in the newspaper of dick and his parents. dick cries and thanks him

- they get to talking and dick & selina are like “how did you get here? where are your parents?” and tim is just like “oh they’re in egypt. i rode my bike here :)”

- this of course leads to dick and selina stealing tim and leaving bruce to deal with the consequences once again

- it’s easily resolved, selina becomes tim’s emergency contact and they talk to his parents; whenever janet and jack are away, tim will stay at selina’s. blackmail might be involved but a deal’s a deal

(dick is officially fostered by selina right after jason is adopted by bruce, and about 6 months after that tim (10) confronts selina and reunites with dick)

~ time skip ~

- dick goes to Gotham University and lives on campus but stays with selina every weekend. his major is undecided and he eventually drops out to start paramedic training

- when bruce doesn’t believe jason (15) about Garzonas, he runs away to selina’s where dick (18) and tim (12) comfort him. he tells them about sheila haywood and they research her, but jason ends up deciding not to go after her

- selina has a Talk with bruce and he apologizes to jason, inviting him back as Batboy. jason agrees but visits selina’s apartment far more often. he is Batboy for a few more years before offering the mantle to tim and going off to college

- tim respectfully declines being Batboy, and since jason never dies and bruce never goes off the deep end, it isn’t necessary for him to take on that role

- babs is still Batgirl and then Oracle, and tim decides to train under her with computer stuff instead of going out in a mask. tim helps both Batman and Stray when they need it

(babs becomes Batgirl around the time dick becomes Stray, and becomes Oracle a year into jason’s run as Batboy. she views jason as a little brother, and has a sort of Batman/Catwoman relationship with Stray (aka dick flirts with her as Batgirl and she pretends to hate it. they don’t actually date but end up becoming good friends) dick goes after the joker when babs gets paralyzed and breaks both of his legs. he is Oracle’s #1 fan and is super happy when tim decides to train under her)

(babs is about 2 years older than dick, and balanced being a college student/graduate with being a vigilante. she’s a total badass and works more with the Birds of Prey than Batman, but always has time for dick jason and tim)

- babs becomes a lawyer. dick becomes a paramedic and gives Stray to tim, instead becoming Nightwing- a medic vigilante. tim takes on the mantle of Stray and does the robin hood gig. jason leaves the vigilante life behind and goes to college, majoring in english and minoring in education (he wants to become an english teacher and give Gotham kids good educations)

~ the end ~

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cowboylor · 1 year

Text

champagne bottles littered on the floor

it’s new year’s eve and you and matty don’t get along.

wc: 2.3k

warnings: mature content/dialogue, alcohol consumption, enemies to lovers, a little angst, reader doesn’t let people in easily and it’s painful to watch

note: thank u anon, i took this idea and ran! also this is unedited and not even finished so i can’t legally be held accountable if it’s terrible.

Tired and self-conscious about the dress you went with for the evening, you sip your champagne in the corner of the room. It bubbles down your throat and makes your face warm, but most of all convinces you that going back to your apartment would be the best idea right now.

Because there really wouldn’t be that much you’re missing out on. You’d miss the expensive liquor you’re nursing and the people watching but you’d prefer being alone because New Year’s Eve tended to be depressing anyway. By the end of December, you’re always exhausted and on edge.

So this is Christmas. Well, not anymore at least.

Your name being called across the room breaks you out of your getaway plot.

You turn and see your friend quickly making her way over to you, gushing along the way with words that you can’t make out until she says, “Come sit with me, yeah?”

She motions to the other room and you’re ready to decline until she purses her lips.

“Please, please, please,” She says, “You can’t go home at 10:30. That would be embarrassing for all parties involved.”

Delayed mumbling is all it takes for her to grab your hand, pulling you along after her while you say a silent goodbye to your corner. You debate shaking her off and shouting out a quick apology before making your way to the exit but her stumbling steps give you a reason to follow her. If anything to make sure she makes it to the next room.

You trudge behind her, speaking over the crowd, “I’m out of my limit here!”

She giggles but you’re not completely sure she heard you: “You’re silly. You’ve always been so silly.”

When you arrive at a bar table, she greets everyone with the exclamation of your name. You scan the group of her friends and realize that you know the majority of them. Smiling politely at their slightly glazed-over expressions, you fiddle with the glass in your hand–until you see Matty.

Your smile drops but he just beams in his classic shit-eating-grin way that makes you want to hurl the pregame snacks you partook in hours ago. His tie is loosened around his neck and his collar unbuttoned slightly, a clear indicator that he’s at least few rounds ahead of you. At the sight of him, you become mildly interested in the tabletop.

You top off your flute (the last of your liquid courage) and squeak out “Hi” to everyone. When you look up again, he’s still looking at you. Matty raises his glass toward you in a sardonic manner.

Fucker.

You can’t explain it. You’re sure you would come across as overdramatic if you verbally expressed how insufferable you found Matty Healy. Because he was never explicitly cruel to you. A dick at times sure but he was Matty. You’ve always figured it’s just how he was and either people adored or resented him for it.

“Found you at the right time,” Your friend drapes her arm over your shoulder, pressing her cheek against yours as you take a seat beside her. “I couldn’t let you slip away easily.”

You answer quick questions about how you’ve been and how your new job is going, all while keeping your eyes away from Matty who keeps shooting you looks of amusement; like he sees right through you and your dislike towards him.

“Nice dress,” Ross compliments in the midst of your conversation.

You smile earnestly, looking down to examine the dark blue cocktail dress that you were so apprehensive about earlier: “Thank you.”

“It’s not your usual style,” Matty chirps from the other side of the table. You glower as you make eye contact but he delights at your attention. “Makes you look like a proper lady.”

You blink. “What?”

He takes the last swig of his auburn-colored drink slowly like he intends to make you wait as long as possible before clarifying. You fight the urge to roll your eyes as he makes a show out of wiping his chin clean.

“I’m complimenting you, love.” He deadpans,

Your cheeks burn. “Oh.”

He’s still looking at you intently as you brush down the sides of your dress. His staring problem and your nerves don’t partner well, but he nods and then says: “Blue is your color.”

You don’t respond, pretending to be mildly interested in your friend’s story that you missed half the details for. Yet, you nod, smile, and avoid looking at Matty.

And this works until out of the corner of your eye, he pushes his hair back and you notice the streaks of gray for the first time. His hair has grown longer since you last saw him. Stray curls slip forward through his fingertips and he catches you looking at him.

He winks.

You hate him. You loathe him. You could eat him alive.

You cough into your napkin and your friend looks over. She searches your face with a furrowed brow: “Alright, love?”

“Just warm,” You omit and her hand shoots out to feel your temple. You giggle while batting her hand away. “It’s the alcohol.”

“Can I get you something to drink?” Matty asks you and you look up startled. He motions to the mini bar across the room. “Roy Rogers? Apple juice, if you’re feeling a little dangerous?”

“I’m fine, thank you,” You say as coldly as you can.

You turn back to her and her eyes were now flitting between you and Matty with a curious expression. She side-glances you with an amused look and you shake your head sharply at her silent accusation: Oh?

He relents, raising his hands in mock surrender, “I’m at your call.”

You wipe your hands down on the hem of your dress again and shift in your seat.

Minutes pass by slowly and you’re at your breaking point with how much small talk and strained smiles you can put up with. You brave another look at Matty to see him chatting with his friend, his glass raised as he converses about an unknown topic. You almost have to fight a smile the way his brow furrows when he goes on a tangent for a long period of time.

You press a chaste kiss to your friend’s cheek, before whispering: “I’m off.”

She turns away from her boyfriend to protest your early departure, grabbing onto your hand and pulling you back into your seat.

“Not until midnight!”

“I’ll talk to you soon,” You say apologetically, though thankful she’s in the company of others while she rambles on to you in her past-tipsy state. “You’ll have to tell me all about it later.”

You shift out of your seat, murmuring a shy goodbye to anyone noticing your premature exit. Matty stops his conversation at once when he notices you getting up from your seat.

“Where are you going?” He prods as you turn to go. His eyes crinkle as he shoots you a toothy grin. “Going to prowl for that New Year’s kiss?”

You turn on your heel, muttering, “Don’t be an ass.”

He whistles lowly as some your party lower their eyes uncomfortably. You turn to leave before he gets the chance to quip back.

The outside air is brisk, just as you expected, but you marvel at it when it hits your face. The patio is deserted and you lean against the railing as you sigh. Thankful for cold weather that cools your face, solitude, and a Matty-less environment that doesn’t make you collapse into a nervous wreck.

“Funny seeing you here.”

Your eyes shoot open at Matty entering the patio deck with two fresh glasses in hand.

Fuck your life.

You eye him defensively, “What do you want?”

“I’m just being courteous.” He shrugs, handing you the beverage.

You take it with only a bit of reluctance. “Don’t pull a muscle.”

“My God,” He laughs, setting his glass on the railing. He looks out towards the skyline, his head shaking slightly. “You just can’t help it.”

Your eyes wander to his finger that circles the rim of his glass, before snapping out of it and realize what he’s said.

“Can’t help what?” You ask, frowning slightly.

You smell the beverage before taking a sip, and you’re greeted by the same almond-flavored bubbly as earlier. Matty looks at you with knowing eyes, raising his brows towards you like you’re supposed to read his mind. Like he thinks you two are always on the same wavelength.

You raise your eyebrows in confusion: “I just can’t help what?”

He shrugs, “How bad you want to fuck me.”

You almost spit your champagne out but settle for mildly choking on the liquid, bringing your palm to your mouth as you cough. You shoot him an incredulous look.

“You’re crazy.”

“No?” He bites, clearly amused. “You’re just mildly agitated all the time?”

“That doesn’t mean I want to–” He stares at you and you can feel yourself beginning to burn again. “–fuck you.”

He hums, considering your words and doesn’t say anything else. Doesn’t refute or agree with the sentiment.

“It’s just,” You say, thinking over the words. “You’re never nice to me.”

Matty frowns and he looks puzzled for the first time, “I’m not... nice?”

You cringe at the way it sounds from him, but you’re in too deep now to back down from it: “You never are just nice. There’s always an ulterior motive with you.”

“Ulterior motive,” He repeats, drawing out the syllables like he’s trying to piece everything together.

You’re not sure if he’s being incredibly patient or just taking the piss out of you.

“To tease me,” You explain, “You’re never serious about anything when talking to me. I never know how to interact with you.”

Matty falls silent and you know you sound paranoid to him. So you swirl your champagne flute in small motions, opting to watch the bubbles fizz rather than look him in the eyes.

He steps closer to you and you think you’ve stopped breathing.

“I can be serious with you.”

You shake your head and attempt to laugh but it comes out shaky.

His right hand comes up to toy with your chin, pinching the tip of it so your head tilts up and you have to look at him.

He grins when you meet his eyes, “‘Can be so serious.”

With his other hand, he plays with the end of your dress and you surprise yourself when you reach out to grip his forearm. His eyes wander down to watch himself trace the hem of the material.

“I was serious–” Matty glances up to gauge your reaction to the word choice but you’re too preoccupied with how the distance between you both grows smaller to give him the look he’s looking for. “–when I said you look like a proper lady in this dress. You look beautiful.”

His eyes bore into yours and you don’t want to look away in case he cracks a smile and tells you he’s full of shit. But he doesn’t and you’re leaning in to brush a lone curl out of his brow line, pushing it back against his forehead.

Matty watches you and you let him.

He feels up your lower waist and you fight the urge roll your eyes back at the simple touch. You wrap yourself around him, shifting against him in a subtle motion as he buries himself in your neck. His mouth presses underneath your jaw and your fingernails dig into his arm, pulling him into you even more. You hear his breath audibly hitch when you push your hips into his. His fingers dig into the fabric of your dress making it bunch up at the waist.

He presses his lips to the shell of your ear: “Can’t touch you like that right now, love.”

Your eyes fly open and he holds your hips in place against him as you stare at him incredulously.

“Why?”

He smirks at your reaction, “Why? You expect me to bend you over the railing in front of everyone?”

You blink slowly, looking around to see the vacant patio you’re occupying.

Is this ‘everyone’ in the room with us right now? You want to say but think that may come across as too much.

You concede with a huff and disconnect your limbs from him. He chuckles at your disappointed expression, trailing his fingertip up to your cheek as if to say to be continued.

#ew #matty healy imagine #matty healy x reader #the 1975 imagines #*my writing #deactivating as we speak

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ohtobeleah · 7 months

Note

Whenever I see that gif set of Slider and Hangman, it makes me think that Slider could be his dad more than Iceman is his dad. Cause they both have the whole cocky attitude and we can't forget showing off at the beach 🤤

What if, and like really picture it. What if Slider had a kid he never knew about? With Jakes mum who ended up marrying Mr. Seresin and she got Jakes last name legally changed from her maiden name to Seresin.

But he goes his whole life not knowing his dad isn’t his biology dad. And then it all comes out when his parents go through a nasty divorce and Mr. Seresin spills the beans.

“I’m not even your real father Jacob—you’re mother was rooting some aviator.” And then it clicks for the old drunk who’s never truly been proud of Jake for a single thing in his life. “Guess the apple really didn’t fall far from the tree after all.”

“Mum?” Jake has to know. He needs to because he swears his blood hurts he’s in so much disbelief.

It’s only when he gets back to North Island after the not so great family reunion that Jake finds out the names of the new TopGun recruits and sees a last name that feels like he’s got a hot knife in his chest the second he reads it.

“Kerner.”

You’re the half-sister he never even knew existed.

“C’mon Bradshaw don’t be a fuckin wank.” Jake can hear the dramatics coming his way in the hall before he sees the two of you. You’re only a year or two younger than Jake, and with how Rooster went on about Slider, he gathered the two of you would have to be pretty close. “Take me out for dinner, it’s my first weekend here and I’ve got literally nothing else to do.”

“My god.” Bradley secretly loved it. “Fine—if you’ll get off my dick I’ll take you to dinner.”

“Perfect, pick me up at seven?”

“Wear that dress that makes your tits looks real good.” Jake wants to just die. You’re his fucking sister and Bradshaws seen your boobs. “Hey Hangman!” He had turned on his heals to make an attempt to leave before Rooster could catch him but here he was, being called back. “This is Y/n, Sliders kid—the one I told you about.”

Jake doesn’t speak. He doesn’t shake your hand and he doesn’t look your way. He simply presses his lips together in a fine line and ducks past you.

“What the hells that guys problem?” You ask all the while you watch Jake make a sharp right down the hall. Jake runs to the nearest bathroom he can find and drops to his knees at the toilet to throw his lunch up. He can’t believe you’re here, his half-sister, is here and no one knows. No one knows about his parents divorce, no one knows Jake isn’t biologically a Seresin.

But most importantly—you have not a fucking clue that you have an older brother…..Who hates that you got the dad he was robbed of.

#Jake Seresin angst

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plainemmanem · 1 year

Note

this what what modern steve looks like to me. he wears his glasses and his hair is shaggy and he very strictly only lets you call him stevie and hes popular but private and hes a sweetie pie and he doesnt pay much attention to detail because hes steve but he always notices the nicest things and he loves your S necklace even though its so cliche and he wears a ring that reminds him of you that he takes of for nothing and no one and he is such a good kisser it cant be legal its so not fair

and he has the biggest fattest bestest dick ever and he gives it to u so good ☺️

this has been. rotting. in my inbox because i love it so much this is peak modern steve content right here. everything you said is so so so true woah.

he wears his glasses all the time but only after you BEGGED him to get a prescription. he refused to wear glasses before but then you said he’d look so hot in them and now he wears them every day:)

he has his hair kind of long and unruly but it’s always so soft and clean and silky because he takes good care of it, he just doesn’t always take the time to style it and sometimes he just wears a cap or a beanie because he can’t be bothered:)

and he grows a little mustache because you ask him to:) and he is very good about keeping it tidy and he always asks like “the stache still doin it for you?” and you’re always like “steve. you are hot always, but with that. you are actually so so so unbearably attractive.” and he always gets all mushy after you say that:)

and he only lets you call him stevie yeah. robin calls him it once as a little joke and you’re like . hm i kind of like that. so now when you call him it — usually when you’re feeling soft or he’s looking so sweet and boyfriend — a little blush always rises up from his neck to his cheeks and he always likes to pretend it doesn’t bother him but he’s so transparent with you, you can immediately tell. and when robin calls him that again he’s like “don’t. call me that.” and she’s like “but y/n calls you it all the time. she got it from ME you know.” and he’s like “i don’t like it when you say it.” but it’s really just because everytime robin says it, he immediately thinks of you and his face goes a little red:)

and he’s such a charmer when you’re out. he loves to schmooze a crowd, it’s residual from his king steve days. and he loves talking and chatting, but sometimes he doesn’t wanna be the center of attention, he just wants to stand off to the side with you and whisper and joke in your ear and gossip about people at the party. and he’s a little fake BAHAHA. someone will come up to him at a party and they’ll be like “oh my god! steve!” and he’s like “wow, hey! how’s it going! it’s been forever” and he’s laying it on so thick, but he’s really convincing, and the second you guys walk away you’re like “steve, who was that??” and he’s like “absolutely no idea, all i can remember is that he cheated on his girlfriend a couple years ago so we do not like him.”

and he can get kind of distracted at times, mostly by you, so he isn’t too in touch with a lot of things outside of you. he can tell from across the room if you need a refill on your drink, but he fails to notice when robin dyes her hair pink, he’s not always the most observant when it’s not pertaining to you but he tries:)

and he doesn’t really stay in the loop with a lot of things. like, he doesn’t know too much about the news or new music or social media or anything unless you tell him about it. so he’s like “hey guys! did you hear about that new BeReal thing??? y/n just told me about it:)” and everyone’s like “steve, that’s been a thing for like…. six months.”

and he got you that silly “s” necklace a couple months ago for an anniversary and he used some cheesy line like “so i’m always right there, by your heart☺️” and he was partially playing it up as a gag, but then you start to where it and never take it off, and he never really thought jewelry could do something to him, but just seeing it around your neck. knowing that your his and he’s yours and you wanna show everyone that. makes him a little dizzy and a little possessive :)

and you get him a ring a couple months later with both of your initials engraved into the side. and you try to keep it casual, like the ring isn’t a huge deal, like “well i have my necklace so i thought, i dunno, maybe you’d want something to wear too. for us:)” and then he wears it on his pinky every day and never takes it off and he’s very adamant about wearing it and never losing it. and he always fidgets with it when he’s anxious and he loves when you twirl it around his finger late at night when you’re holding his hand in bed:)

and he’s an amazing kisser yeah:( he knows exact how you like it and when you need him to be soft and when you need him to just take control and he’s a frequent kisser too. you guys aren’t really into pda at all, but i think he’s a big “kiss on the temple” in place of saying “hi” or “goodbye.” hes leaving the tip for the waiter at the restaurant and he’ll jog after you on the street and sling an arm over your shoulder and plant a little peck on your temple like “where to now? home? or dessert? or we can walk the block for a little while?” and when you visit him at work and he’s really excited to see you, he’ll come around the counter and he’ll give you one of those cocky smiles like “couldn’t stay away?” and he grabs your head with both hands and plants a kiss on your hairline and drags you into his side and behind the counter with an arm over your shoulders. and he’s like “thank god you showed up, robin was just about to start ranting about her stupid band camp again.” and then as robin starts rambling and getting lost in her thoughts, steve will lean down and press a little kiss into your temple and whisper a soft “hi:)” into your skin, before turning back to bicker with robin:)

yeah and his cock is huge, the first few times he literally insists on being on top and controlling how much he gets inside you because he’s afraid to hurt you. and he’s just like. really good in bed. the first few times you sleep together, you’re both a little clumsy and awkward, but you’re both just so giddy and giggly, it’s not scary or anything:) and after a little while, he just gets really really good at knowing what you like and how you like it and he really makes it a point to make your legs shake at least once every time because he’s nice like that:)

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington smut

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startrekfangirl2233-writes · 1 year

Text

You Are My Soulmate

Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Reader

Status: In Progress

Last Updated: March 6th, 2024

Disclaimers: Female!Reader

A/N: This is a Soulmate!AU with a spin. Instead of having a single soulmark, a quarter of the population have multiple. Tinkerbell and Rooster are two of those people. I love Soulmate AUs, and well, the Top Gun Brain-Rot is still ever present, so here we go. This one is going to be a bit different for me, as I'm going to be trying out flipping perspectives within the chapters between Rooster and Tinkerbell (Reader's Nickname throughout the fic).

Themes: Angst, Smut, Soulmate!AU, Bradley is a bit of a dick, Rivals to Friends to Lovers, Unrequited Love (Slight, One-Sided)

Summary: You're ecstatic when you find out you have five soul indicators at midnight on the day of your twenty-first birthday, right before you start Officer Candidate School for the Navy in Rhode Island. OCS is so complex you can’t devote time to searching for your soulmate. On graduating from Officer Candidate School, Naval Aviation Command School, and Aviation Maintenance School at the top of your class, you are given the primary selection of detachment and travel worldwide as an Aviation Maintenance Duty Officer. The excitement you felt on your twenty-first birthday has changed over the past seven years, and you’re impatient to see who your soul is. After years of constant movement, it’s a relief to learn you have been assigned to run maintenance on a squadron’s planes out of Naval Air Station North Island. San Diego is sunny and gorgeous, an absolute dream after being stuck on an aircraft carrier in the middle of the ocean for the past six months. The Dagger Squad is a newly-permanent squadron based out of NAS North Island. Each member welcomed you to Miramar as a part of their maintenance crew with warmth and friendliness. Except for one pilot, callsign: Rooster. He’s the most unpleasant pilot you’ve ever met. He’s full of himself, cocky, arrogant, rude, and condescending. If only he didn’t feel so familiar. If only you didn’t feel so drawn to him.

Bradley Bradshaw is sure he’s never going to find his soulmate. He’d been in mourning on his twenty-first birthday, still grieving the loss of his mother, followed by the loss of the only father he’d ever known, his Uncle Mav. It isn’t until Bradley is across the country at Officer Candidate School that he realizes he never received his soul indicators. Years later, and thousands of miles away, recovering from a plane crash, Bradley, now known as Rooster, jolts awake to the half-remembered scent of citrus and glistening hair in a thick braid. Without any other indicators, Rooster gives up. After all, who’d want a soul disfigured by something they loved? That’s when Bradley gives up. He sinks into the reputation of the piano-playing, mustachioed casanova and gives up on his dreams of finding a love like his parents had found in each other. And he’s content with his life until he runs into the feisty, loud AMDO officer newly assigned to NASNI. Something about her feels like everything Bradley’s been searching for, at least, if she weren’t completely committed to Bagman already. You can call him what you want, but Rooster doesn’t steal another man’s girl.

You Are My Soulmate on AO3

You Are My Soulmate on Wattpad

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2 - Tinkerbell

Chapter 2 - Rooster

Chapter 3 - Rooster

Chapter 3 - Tinkerbell

Chapter 4

Chapter 5 - Tinkerbell

Chapter 5 - Rooster

Chapter 6 - Tinkerbell

Chapter 6 - Rooster

Chapter 7 - Tinkerbell

Chapter 7 - Rooster

Taglist is Open!

Want to be added to the Taglist for this fic? Leave a comment on this masterlist or drop me a message in my inbox!

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I DO NOT CONSENT TO HAVE MY WORK POSTED, TRANSLATED, OR PUBLISHED ON ANY SITES OTHER THAN HERE OR ON AO3 BY ME. IF YOU SEE MY WORKS ANYWHERE OTHER THAN HERE OR AO3, THEN THEY HAVE BEEN POSTED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND I WILL BE WORKING TO TAKE THEM DOWN.

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igotanidea · 11 months

Text

//For his eyes only//: J.T x fem!reader x D.G

Summary: how would it be to have both Nightwing and Red hood in bed at the same time? Well, Y/n was curious as well.

You can check the preview here.

Warnings: SMUT, ass fucking, unprotected p in v, dirty talk, showoff, sexual tension, it's absolutely explicit.

MINORS DNI!!!!!!! I'M SERIOUS!!!! IT'S HEAVY MATURE CONTENT AND I SWEAR IF YOU ARE UNDER LEGAL AGE AND INTERACT WITH THAT I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND BLOCK YOU FOR GOOD!

***

“I can’t believe I actually agreed to that” Jason muttered with jaw clenched as he watched his girlfriend bustling around, waiting for Grayson to show up to their little party.

“Come on, Jace.” She smiled brightly, absolutely innocently, almost like they weren’t going to have a threesome soon. And if he didn’t know what she was reading beneath that plan t-shit and mom jeans he would probably believe that fake chastity “it’s gonna be fun.”

“Yeah, right.” he turned around just to avoid looking at her angelic face and getting that sting of jealousy caused by the thought that he actually was going to share her with his fucking brother. “Maybe for you, but not for me…..”

“Jay….” She cooed, putting a hand on his shoulder from behind and massaging the tensed muscles gently “we’ve talked about it.” Y/N took a step forward, her front now pressing to his back, hand travelling down his biceps, caressing gently “why don’t you just relax a little?” she raised on her tiptoes and kissed the crook of his neck making him groan.

“I swear if Grayson doesn’t show up his ass here in the next ten second I won’t even bother controlling myself anymore….” Jason gasped, the touch of her lips making him hornier and harder than even before.

“You know I only want you.” she assured “we’re just playing around, but it’s nothing serious, you know it, right?” she muttered against his skin “I don’t care about Dick.”

“Fuck, princess” Jason turned around and caught her sneaky hands in his “don’t test me right now, cause I can still call this thing off and have you pinned to the mattress or the wall, screaming my fucking name.”

“I bet I will do it one way or another.” She licked her lips, eyes blown with lust, mirroring the same expression he had in his

“Fuck!” Jason hissed and put his lips on hers, kissing her hungrily with lust, want, need, his own hands finding a way towards her waist and hips, playing with the band of her pants, reaching for that red strings she hid from his prying eyes. “I want you, princess.” He pulled her closer to him so she could feel how hard he already was “Now. please. Let’s just tell Grayson to fuck off and have fun by ourselves. I can make you feel good.”

“Ah, ah, ah.” She wriggled out of his embrace making him whine and shook her finger at him “you are not a party pooper, are you, Jaybrird?” she pouted “you won’t deny your good girl a little more fun, will you?”

“Y/N…..” his tone became more of a warning than anything else, clear sign he was closing in on his patience. But before he could say anything else, the knock on the door cut him off. Y/N smiled brightly at Jason and moved to open the door, her boyfriend close behind. Like fuck he was going ot leave her out of his sight tonight.

“Hey Y/N” Dick, who was casually leaning on the frame put on his boy-wonder smile “Jaylad.”

“Hello to you too, Dickie” Y/N reciprocated the smile making Jason roll his eyes “come on in. You are right on time. Jace was getting quite impatient with the waiting.”

“Well, I cannot blame him. I was a bit giddy myself, knowing the treat….” Dick gave Y/N a glance and even if she was only in her plain, everyday clothes he was perfectly capable of imagining the rest.

“Careful with words now, Grayson!” Jay’s arms wrapped around Y/N protectively “remember your place here!”

“I know, I know” Dick raised his hands in surrender. “you are the boyfriend and I’m just a tag along. “

“Is that what he told you?” Y/N frowned

“Was I wrong, princess? Is he more to you? Think about that answer carefully, cause it may change how I will treat you tonight.” Jason whispered into her ear, still standing behind her and yet, looking straight into Dick’s eyes just to prove to his brother who was in charge of Y/N’s good mood this night.

“Mmmm.” Y/N whined a little, squirming against him “I like it when you go rough on me, Jason. I actually have an idea for tonight, but how about we move to the bedroom first?”

***

Her idea.

Dammit.

Her idea was pretty much based on the “good cop, bad cop” scenario.

What else, considering the fact that Dick actually used to be a cop and she really did like Jason going hard. Grayson was just supposed to be counterpoise to that.

And they just went for the plan.

How could they not, when she grabbed each of the boys by the hand and swaying her hips and wriggling her ass, lead them both towards the bedroom.

“We need some ground rules here.” Jason voice was stern as he glanced at his brother. “First of all, I am the only one who can make her come. You have no privileges with that, Grayson. Secondly, the second I tell you to move away from her, you listen to me. No objections. And last but not least, that pussy is mine and mine only.”

“Anything more there?” Dick smirked. With such attitude the good cop part was not going to stick to him for long.

“I think I made myself clear.”

“So…..” Dick trailed moving closer to Y/N who already laid on the bed, propped on her elbows, still in her clothes, her gaze jumping from Dick to Jason and back, watching them doing this crazy male-ego show. “You wouldn’t mind if I take those layers of her?” he climbed onto the bed, hovering over the girl, slowly peeling her shirt off.

“FUCK!” in a blink of an eye, Jace was on the other side of the bed, almost pushing Dick from the mattress

“That’s what I thought.” Dick laughed

“You know what?” Y/N sighed, getting quite impatient. “I can do this myself if none of you is capable. Maybe this will make it easier.” She lifted herself up, shoving Dick and Jason away and bowing on her knees. Painfully slowly, showing inch by inch of skin she started to peel her shirt off, caressing her own skin and breast in the process, exposing that damn red lingerie that was going to give Jace a heart attack. “How is that for the prelude?” she moaned, playing with her own, still covered breast. “God, if only someone could take care of me….”

“I ….” Dick started. He was already hypnotized by her every movement.

“Now, boys.” She freed herself from the top completely, smiling tentatively, her hair falling loose around her face “tell me, is it fair that I’m the only one half-undressed?” the question got her two heads shaking for a “no” answer “take your shirts off for me.”

She didn’t have to wait long since both brothers simply tore their polos off, letting her soak in their perfectly toned chests and abs. God, she was going to have them both tonight.

“Y/N…” Jason whined, trying to reach for her, but she pushed him away again.

“Not yet, Jaybird. Not even close. I remember what I promised you, but stay patient for just one moment, can you?”

“What did she promise you?”

“Oh, you’ll see, Dickie. But for now.” she crawled closer to Grayson and put her lips on his, feeling him response immediately. Oh, he was a good kisser. Very skillful as his mouth moved in perfect sync with hers, slowly travelling towards her neck, shoulder and collarbone making her shiver.

“Mmm.” she moaned when he nibbled on her soft spot, her palm landing on Grayson’s chest, clawing on it gently, spurring him on, his excitement visible in his jeans “so good, Dick. So fucking good, I’ll give you that. Guess Kori was right about you. Wonder what else you have in store”

“Let me show you.” he groaned against her skin, trying to push her onto her back and have his way with her, but she pulled back.

“Nah. Patience is the word for you both. I’m gonna have my fun and hopefully some of it will be left for you. But it’s about me, understood?”

They both nodded. Her behavior, the fact that she had them both in her control was doing things to all three of them.

“Great. Now, Jaybrid.” She moved to the other side of the bed “show me what you got.” She grabbed Jason’s hands and put them on her waist, this time kissing him. He was rougher than Dick, going on her faster with more lust and need than his brother. But it was easier for him since he knew all the soft spots Dick had to find by himself “Jason….” she whined, tangling hands in his messy, silky black hair while he squeezed her tighter earning a little gasp.

“Do I make you feel good, baby?” he bit on her shoulder

“Showoff.” She moaned, grabbing onto him.

“Let me take those off.” Jason cooed playing with the button of her jeans, padded thumbs brushing over the soft skin of her belly

“Fuck.” She arched her back to him, her control slowly slipping “just do it.”

“As you wish” if she was going to have her fun, he was not the one to deny it. But it never meant he couldn’t tease her. And when he started removing her pants, slowly, making her lay down on the bed on her back, kissing her thigh, inside knee and calf in the process he knew she was back at his mercy.

“Don’t tease the girl, Jaybird” Dick laughed “she said it herself, she need someone to take care of her.”

“Oh, I am gonna take care of her.” Jason hissed, moving to hover over her body, looking straight into her eyes “not so fierce now, that you are under me, huh, princess?”

‘That can be easily changed.” She smirked, wrapping legs around Jason’s waist and swiftly changing the positions so now she was straddling him.

“Hm.” Jason smirked “I’m not gonna complain about that.”

“What about me?” Dick objected

“You can fuck off, Grayson.” Those reckless words made Y/N leave Jason’s lap and once again move to Dick.

“You will have the first round with me, Dick. It’s only fair before Jason stretch me out.”

“WHAT NOW?!” Jason yelled trying to grab her and pull her back to him, but Dick was already holding her against him, rubbing her sides igniting fire in her

“What makes you think I won’t be the one to stretch you out, sunshine?”

“How about we check?” she smirked, palming on his erection “oh, you are not lying, you are big. He’s big, Jason “ she threw a teasing glance at her boyfriend who was red due to the mix of fury and lust “Care to share with the group, Mr. Grayson?”

“You know me, I hate to brag, but since you asked to nicely….” The second she moved from him, Dick managed to free himself from the pants and boxers, showing all his glory, ready for action, already covered with pre-cum.

“Hmmmm.” Y/n wriggled on the bed invitingly “all that for me? Oh, Dick, you really shouldn’t have. Come to me for a treat my sweet boy.”

“But…” Jason objected again even though no one was listening as Dick crawled over Y/N pressing all his body against her. She was still in that damn lingerie, but the thin material was doing nothing to prevent her from feeling all of Dick’s body as he grinded into her, turning her into a wet pool of lust.

“How about we get rid of that.” Dick played with the sting of her underwear, still waiting for her permission

“Oh, yes, right.” She realized and pushed him away. It was truly amazing how much self-control she had. “Jace.” The girl motioned for the other boy to come closer “I always keep my promises.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, finally.” At this point, Todd was simply burning alive. He needed to feel her skin, her body against his. It was his right. And this time he was not going to go slow. He wanted all of her now. The fuck he was going to let Grayson go first. Besides, Dick (pun intended) wasn’t big at all. Not even close to him and maybe Y/N needed a little reminder of that. As Jason started to untie all those strings and straps of her underwear in the corner of an eye he noticed his brother jerking off. Pathetic. Famous Dick Grayson could not hold his own arousal. But then again, who would be able to do that with naked Y/N around? Shit, she was so hot

Jason put the straps of her bra down kissing her shoulders and moving lower towards her breast, sucking on each nipple making her moan and writhe against him, her arms wrapping around his back, pulling him closer, her legs slightly opening, making more place for him..

“not so fast, princess.” He bit on her breast and immediately soothed the mark with his tongue.

“Jay, please…” she whimpered

“But you wanted Dick to go first.” Jason pouted moving to kiss her belly and started to untie her red panties “Didn’t you love?”

“Mmmmm.” She gasped when her underwear were gone, her pussy exposed to the air, and when Jason moved away, back to his teasing mood “please….”

“Aren’t you a little moaning mess. And for who? For me, aren’t you? You beg for me. Only for me. Not him.” Honestly he was trying to do some self-assurance more than teasing her. But he needed to hear her say it. “what do you want, princess? Who do you want first.” His fingers found a way to her clit and started circling it gently, adding to the flame inside her

“Ah!” she squirmed “I….. I…..”

“Tell me princess.”

“I… I want you…. you both.”

Oh? That was a little surprising. Who would have thought that she could be so dirty, needing not one but two men to satisfy her. That was so fucking hot.

“I don’t think that is how it’s going to work, love.” Jason chuckled ‘choose.”

“I….please….” she almost cried, unable to form a sentence, her mind overwhelmed by the lust, craving the release “please….” A few tears flew down her cheeks and Jason wiped them off, kissing her lips, slowly, gently, reassuringly.

“I got you love. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you. Actually, I will let Dickhead go first, cause he only got this one chance before I give you hundred more orgasm.” He moved back making room for his brother and causing Y/N’s body to tremble. “I meant what I said, Grayson. Her pussy is mine. And you don’t get to see her face when she comes. All you get is doggy style.”

“how about we ask Y/N what she needs.”

“Fuck! Just give me whatever!” she cried out. “If you want to keep talking it’s fine by me, but I will kick you out of my room and finish on my own!”

“fine!” dick relented “doggy style.”

“I want to see her face” Jason instructed moving to sit on the nearby chair, unzipping his own pants. This time Dick did not say a word grabbing Y/N by the waist and moving her onto all four, so she could face Jason. Spreading her legs a bit, he moved behind her.

“Hey! Aren’t you forgetting something!?” Jason shrieked

“What?”

“You are not going raw with my girl!” Todd threw a pack of condoms towards his brother.

“Medium size?” Dick hissed but then smirked “are those yours?”

“Very funny, Dickhead. Unlike you, I came prepared. I bought them especially for you. While covering my face obviously. Just wanted to avoid humiliation.”

“Hm, really. Guess it didn’t quite work out.” Dick laughed, putting the rubber band on and focusing back on Y/N with her ass in the air, whining but waiting patiently “Y/N.” he whispered “Are you….?”

“Fuck! Just do it, Dick. I need you!”

“Shit!” He pushed in, stretching her and filling fully, bottoming instantly due to how wet she was. They both groaned in unison and it made Jason flinch but he did not say a word, quite literally biting on his tongue. Todd tried to stay focus on his girlfriend face, twisting with pleasure and not on the fact that is was Grayson who was giving her that. “You good, Y/N?”

“Good. Just move, Dick, move.” She wriggled her ass and it was all Dick needed to start thrusting into her.

“Shit, you feel so good, Y/n. So good. Now I know why Jason was reluctant to share. Shit, you are a dream.”

“Mhmmmm.” She whined meeting the pace of his thrust “Fuck, Dick…” the way she was gasping his name only spur him on. “more…. God, more…. “

“I’ll give you everything you want, Y/N” he moaned, grabbing her waist and pulling her back flush to his chest, his pace not slowing for even a second, her whines getting stronger. “Everything” her hand found his head and tangled in his hair while he added to all the stimuli by kissing her neck and grabbing her breast squeezing them, twisting the nipples.

“Fuck! Oh, fuck! Yes, yes! Dick, damn it yes! So… so close!”

“Come for me, y/n. I got you.” he barely hold himself back from adding “come for me in front of your boyfriend” but it was not needed since her orgasm washed over her with the force of hurricane, her body going completely numb in his arms. She was pretty much a jello.

“Dick…” she gasped, holding onto his biceps

‘How was that?”

“God, I…. wow. Let me just say I’m really glad you came.”

“Anytime for you sweetness.” He kissed her forehead

“Are you two done?” Jason hissed from the side. Only then Dick and Y/N remembered that he was actually still there. His tone might have suggested otherwise, but he really did enjoy the show as well. And there were clear signs of that, all over his hands and abs.

“Jason…” Y/N whispered, her sensitive body suddenly remembering how good he was making her feel. “Make me feel good.”

“Do you even realize how hot you are?” he asked taking Dick’s place “your face when you come. Fuck. I love you” he pushed her onto her back, capturing her lips in his. ‘You’re mine.”

“I’m yours.” She mumbled, spreading her legs open, making space for him “Jason. Jason. Jason.” his name was like a prayer in her lips, sounding so good said in that breathy moan. “I want to feel you.”

“Only me?” he smirked, tracing patterns on her inside thigh. So close and yet so far from her center.

“Yes, Jason, only you.”

“We’re never gonna do this again, are we? The fucking threesome?” he asked, pressing his body closer to hers, moving lightly to give her foretaste of what was coming.

“No!’ she agreed way to fast, but who cared. “Never! I swear! Please! Jason, baby, please, please, please…”

“How can I ever refuse you?” he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear gently and spread her folds in that delicious stretch. No one said he wasn’t going to go raw. She just felt to good around him to get separated by anything. And she was on pill eitherway. “God, you are still so tight. Guess someone was smaller than he was bragging to be.”

“Jason!” Y/N cried out and his attention was immediately back to her as he grabbed her legs and wrapped them around his hips pushing deeper, harder, faster. Now she was making those sweet sounds only for him. Only he could make her come so fast, so hard, so intensely. Only he knew how to please her, how to get her high.

“Baby.” He groaned “tell me how this feels.” He needed her to say it. To assure him he was doing good, perfect, better than anyone (even though said anyone was sitting nearby, watching the scene with pain on his face and his dick in his hands).

“Ah… don’t stop Jace! Don’t stop. Make me come! Fuck, I missed you.” she was obviously referring to her first orgasm which Dick got from her. Apparently her subconscious wanted it to be given by Jason and not his brother. “You’re doing so good, baby. So good!” she tightened her legs around him allowing him to hit her g-spot with every thrust.

“Together?” he asked intertwining their fingers, snapping his hips more and more, only to please her, feeling both hers and his orgasm coming. They were just perfectly synchronized.

“YES! Yes, Jason. Yes! Yes! Oh, god, fuck yes!” her walls fluttered around him as another wave of pleasure, this time stronger than before hit her making her vision blurry, her whole face screaming with pleasure as she screamed his name. His fucking name as he made her ride the high, prolonging the sweet release, not ready to let her go just yet. Not wanting to let go of her.

“God, Y/N.” he mumbled once she came down and he himself emptied his balls into her, but still not pulling back “I want to stay like this forever. With you. Just us” he leaned down to kiss her lovingly, without any urgency.

“Then stay.” She smiled lightly, caressing his chest and his autopsy scar “I want you to stay with me. I want to stay with you.”

“Let me just clean you up, first, baby. And then we’ll cuddle. I swear I’m letting you go before that.”

“I’d like that.”

“You heard the girl, Grayson.” Jason grabbed Dick’s pants blindly and threw them his brother’s direction “you had your fun now get the fuck out!”

“well, that really was fun.” Dick slowly started to put his clothes on ‘I’m sure you won’t forget how I felt Y/N, cause sure as hell am I not forgetting your taste.”

“I SAID GET THE FUCK OUT!”

“See you around, sunshine.” Dick grinned and letting his instincts take the best of him almost jumped out the window “Oh, yeah, right. Too soon” he laughed quickly realizing he was in civil, not the vigilante version of himself. When he finally left Jason grinned and turned towards his girlfriend, hugging her tightly.

“Why are you grinning like crazy?”

“Have you seen his face when I made you come?”

“Um, no? Believe me, that was the last thing on my mind at that moment. In fact, I am offended that it was on yours….”

“God, he was just so fucking jealous!” Jason was glowing “Thank you, babe” he pecked her lips “you were right. It was like killing two bird with one stone!”

“You are just unbelievable” Y/N shook head at her boyfriend stupidity

“But still, we are not doing this again, are we?”

“If you keep acting like a kid who just won a prize at fair….”

“Are you threatening me now, princess?”

“Just reminding you that a treasure like me have to be cherished.”

“Oh, I know that” he smirked and pushed her onto her back.

Were they supposed to get cleaned and cuddle? Yes. Sure. But with Grayson out of the picture and Y/N still in his arms, who was going to stop Jason Todd from devouring his girl again?

@clairacassidy

#jason todd x reader #dick grayson x reader #jason todd smut #nightwing smut #jason todd fanfiction #jason todd imagine #jason todd #jason todd x fem!reader #jason todd x oc #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #red hood fanfiction #red hood imagine #red hood x reader #red hood x fem!reader #red hood #red hood x y/n #nightwing x reader #dick grayson smut

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quesadillayuri · 5 months

Text

do u guys ever think about how the partners of those on the qsmp are gods and/or godesses in the lore. unrelated did u know that tommyinnit and tubbo underscore are legally married. just thought that was interesting.

Tubbo is, admittedly, not the best person.

He’s kind of a bit of a dick. He’s reckless, doesn’t have much regard for his own personal safety, let alone others, and he can be callous and rude and prickly and blunt. He’s not afraid to push buttons, literally or metaphorically, and he can be... explosive. Destructive, even. To say the least.

On further introspection, Tubbo realizes that he’s actually a lot more than a bit of a dick.

He doesn’t deserve this though. Probably.

Tubbo can’t remember much, but he’s almost entirely sure that he’s done nothing to deserve this. Literally no crime ever committed, ever, is worth this punishment.

“I hate you,” Tubbo sighs, for the ninetieth time in the past four minutes, “I hate you so much.” He pulls off his jacket, slipping his arms out of the sleeves and tossing the jacket in the general direction of the prick that can’t quite leave him alone. Tommy recoils at the jacket thrown across his face suddently, letting out a —incredibly cathartic for Tubbo— squak of surprise. Tubbo stomps away, leaving Tommy to reel away in his overblown, exaggerated horror at Tubbo’s dastardly actions, or whatever.

“This is, quite literally, very homophobic of you, Toby,” Tommy says, all faux-shock and concern, like Tubbo will believe him for a second. “Truly just so homophobic, I’m writing a twitlonger as we speak because Jesus, Toby—”

“You’re not even gay!” Tubbo bites out, left eye twitching. He stomps away, leaviTommy gasps at this, and Tubbo reminds himself that wringing his neck is not an option, despite it looking more and more appealing by the second.

“Oh, and how do you know that?” Tommy argues, walking right on Tubbo’s heels, “You really can’t base things on stereotypes, Toby, it’s incredibly offensive, you know? Just because I look straight and sound straight and act straight and— Oh, hi Em— say I’m straight doesn’t mean I am. What about me is straight to you?”

“Well, maybe the girlfriend, if I had to hazard a guess,” Tubbo says sarcastically, “Although I suppose that’s not relevant right now?”

He’s joking, obviously, because it’s very relevant.

“Oh Toby— Toby, Toby, Toby. Sweet, young Toby,” Tommy starts, and Tubbo knows he is not planning on stopping, “Of course, that’s not relevant. I’m talking about our marriage!”

“We’re not married,” Tubbo says, for the one-hundred ninetieth time in the last five minutes.

“Oh, ho-ho, but we are!” Tommy says, and Tubbo weighs the pros and cons of killing himself rapidly and graphically by throwing himself out of the nearest possible window. The pros are not currently outweighing the cons, but with how this conversation is going, they probably will soon.

“Sign the fucking divorce papers, Tommy,” Tubbo sighs, a little angry about how long this has been going on for, but mostly tired and resigned. And angry, because Tommy’s neck is looking so, so wringable right now, but mostly tired.

Tommy just laughs, and disappears in that frustrating, echoey way they all do. Em’s never far behind him, but Tubbo dispairingly turns to her at the kitchen counter anyway, for his own comfort. To her credit, she does offer him a smile, but at best it’s pitying, and at worst it’s amused. Tubbo thinks it might be both.

“I’d say I’m sorry, but I think we both know it’s going to take more than that to get him to sign those papers,” Em says, and Tubbo groans.

“Why don’t you tell him?” Tubbo asks, desperate, but knowing the answer anyway.

“Because this way, it’s—”

“One thousand times funnier,” Tubbo finishes for her. He lacks the energy to even attempt to mock Tommy’s tone, but Tubbo hears his voice ringing in his head anyway. Em laughs, and then she disappears too. Tubbo squints at the place where they both were, like if he stares for long enough they will both reappear as reasonable, normal, willing-to-sign-the-divorce-papers sort of people. They don’t, because God hates Tubbo, and the world hates Tubbo, and the universe hates Tubbo.

The only thing that the universe did right was make sure that Tommy didn’t have the foresight to make him sign a prenup. At least Tubbo can get Tommy’s money when he finally signs the divorce papers.

If he ever signs the divorce papers.

Tubbo slams his head against the wall again.

Tubbo_: never get married

pactw: ?

Tubbo_: dont do it pac

pactw: ???????

#sorry i think im Really funny #also this has been stuck in my head all day bc i think marriage fraud tommy & tubbo is so fucking funny to me #like yea. tommy conned that man into getting married.#nothing better than that #tommyinnit #tubbo #qsmp #clingy duo #fanfic #fanfiction #.writing

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