#the soccer player who's there broke the wall and he's going to break them

[lovelytsunoda]

lovelytsunoda’s definitive motorsports fiction rec-list

because i am a bookworm and aspiring goodreads influencer. this is where i am going to fawn over fictional men and addictive storytelling.

part one/ ?

throttled - lauren asher ( dirty air #1 )*

rating: 4 stars

where to begin with this one? i have a whole pinterest board but that’s a story for another day. maya alatorre’s brother santiago just beame the secondary driver for bandini and she’s joining the team on the road for race season, where she meets ( and ultimatley falls in love with ) noah slade, formula one’s resident golden boy and legacy driver with daddy issues. featuring enemies to lovers, brother’s rival and secret romance.

collided - lauren asher ( dirty air #2 )*

rating: 4.5 stars

set in the same world as throttled, collided follws sophie mitchell, daughter of bandini team principal james mitchell as she spends the summer on the road with the team, and finds her way into the arms of german mccoy driver liam zander ( who is literally the PERFECT man, like he hits every single point on my trifecta: he’s german, he drives a formula one car and he reads books ). liam is mccoy’s resident bad boy, and his pr team has him on a dating ban after he sleeps with the team principals niece. sophie has a naughty ( vvv spicy ) bucket list, and liam offers to help her out, falling hopelesley in love along the way.

thunderstruck - roxanne st.clair ( harlequin nascar )

rating: 3.5 stars

shelby jackson is the co-owner of the last family owner team in the nascar nextel cup series. sadly, thunder racing is in a terrible financial position and they haven't won anything in years. something that british soccer player mick churchill wants to change when he offers to by the other half of the team. shelby is unimpressed, and keeps trying to push mick out of the business, ultimately falling in love with him in the process. shelby is a girlboss, who commands attention everywhere she goes. mick is a dumbass, match made in heaven. the cover on this one SUCKS but the book is pretty good for being written in 2007, however it lacks any sexy time scenes, as the scenes always cut before there is any real smut.

flash and bones - kathy reiches ( temperance brennan / bones #14 )

rating: 4.5 stars

a dead body is found in an oil drum in the waste processing facility behind the charlotte motor speedway ahead of nascar race week. forensic anthropologist temperance brennan lands the case, and begins looking into the disappearance of a seventeen year old girl and her older boyfriend twelve years prior at the behest of a nascar mechanic related to one of the missing. from there, it’s a rich mystery and vast conspiracy involving militia groups, the fbi, biotoxins and car racing. listen, i was already in love with detective andrew ryan from the other temperance brennan books, but to find out that he is a jacques villeneuve fan, i am swooning.

wrecked - lauren asher ( dirty air #3 )*

rating: 5 stars

this book broke me, i'm not even kidding. this book is forced proximity and enemies to lovers between driver jax kingston and elena gonzalez, his media rep. they both have torubled pasts, and i f i could just warp them both in bubble wrap and protect then from the rowld, i would. jax is dangerously self-destructive, and elena has a hard time letting people in, but once they break down their walls (and god does it take a while) they are truly made for each other.

yes i cried like a baby, no i will not elaborate.

taming zach - amy sparling ( team loco #1 )

rating: 3 stars even.

cute, wholesome but predicatable and a little lame. this book follows motocross racer zach pena who has lost his focus on the sport and this also lost his place at the summer classic. as he risks getting cut from the team, he heads back home to hopewell, where he falls in love with bree grayson, the daughter of the groundskeeper ath hopewell motocross park. it's calssic good girl-bad boy shit, and it's been done many times before. although it can get steamy, there's no smut.

currently undecided if im actually going to finish the series.

redeemed - lauren asher ( dirty air #4 )*

rating: 5 stars

santaigo motherfucking alatorre. santaigo is recovering from a crash at silverstone three years ago that resulted in the loss of his right leg. since the crash, he's sequestered himself inside his mansion on lake como and hidden himself away from the world. chole carter never knew who her father was. after her roomate buys her a drugstore dna kit, she finally has her father's identity and finds herself on a trip to lake como to find him.

what i really liked about this one was that as they fell in love with each other, they also learned how to love themselves more in the process.

the final ranking order i have for the dirty air series (and men) is as follows: 1. Redeemed (Santi), 2. Wrecked (Jax), 3. Collided (Liam), 4. Throttled (Noah).

*bonus chapters are available for all the dirty air books at lauren asher’s website!

#lovelytsunodas motorsports fiction reclist #books #lauren asher #i read stuff #like a lot of stuff

[peacerisendove]

“I'M THE WALL NOOOOOO!!!!” - Gavin Free

#rt extra life #extra life #rooster teeth #gavin free #rt extra life 2021 #extra life 2021 #yes that's gavin screaming NOOOOOOOO #after saying that I'm the wall #the soccer player who's there broke the wall and he's going to break them #there are 80 leet donations #team nice dynamite

[larrytimelines]

July 2021 complete timeline

July 1 (Thur): Robert Harvey posts a pic of Louis in the studio working on LT2 (link).

Holivia is seen by fans having drinks, walking and having dinner in Island of Giglio (pictures and videos here). Within 30 minutes of pictures dropping, there is an article about Holivia on a romantic Italian getaway (link). Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ pic of Holivia at dinner (link).

Deuxmoi mention Holivia’s Italian vacation in their weekly email newsletter, as well as recap Jason and Keeley going on romantic dates in NY on June 26th - further confirming them as a couple (link).

Jason & Keeley are papped on several dates in NY. Ted Lasso is deemed a strong Emmys contender.

July 2 (Fri): Louis is seen watching a EUROs game with Oli in London (videos and pictures here).

Not seen, but Holivia were taking the yacht pics in Monte Argentario (link).

Ted Lasso is expected to “sweep Emmy nominations”. And everyone loves Ted Lasso.

July 3 (Sat): Louis watching the England EUROs game with Calvin, Charlie Lightening, Ella (E’s bff), Ella’s boyfriend, Eleanor and friends (pics here, here; videos here, here).

Holivia in Rome, attending the England v Ukraine match, they are papped and fans take pictures with Harry (pics here, here, here, here, here, here, here and here; pap pics; videos here, here, here, here and here).

Lottie posted a picture of Freddie on her stories with the text “mini Louis” on it (link).

July 4 (Sun): No updates.

July 5 (Mon): Louis is papped and pictured with fans outside the studio (pics here, here, here, here, and here). 

Yachtgate pics from Backgrid of Holivia dancing, lounging and kissing on a yacht drop and Page 6 exclusive. Pics from Monte Argentario on July 2.

Page 6 exclusive about Jason being in NY with the kids and how he’ll go on a promo-tour for Ted Lasso soon. They talk about how Jolivia take turns taking care of the kids and that he’s dating Keeley.

Jul 6 (Tue): Article and pap pics of Louis debuting his long hair to the press and greeting fans while signing autographs outside the studio. Article is positive, light, and mentions his record-breaking livestream last December (link).

Articles about Holivia’s “romantic” Italian getaway & how well Jolivia are co-parenting

July 7 (Wed): Louis is seen watching the EURO games with friends, including Oli, Eleanor, hot Luke, Alana, Ella (E’s bff), Ella’s bf and more (videos here, here, here, and here, pics here, here, here and here).

Articles about Holivia’s “steamy” kiss and “romantic yacht dance” on their Italian vacation

July 8 (Thur): New pictures and Page 6 exclusive of Holivia on the yacht. They try to distort the timeline and say it’s a different day, when it’s all from the same day. Emphasis of articles is on how hot shirtless Harry Styles is kissing Olivia (link).

And another Page 6 exclusive about Holivia being “holed up at a romantic luxury resort in Porto Ercole”.

July 9 (Fri): Super Hi post a video of Louis recording LT2 at the studio (link). And a fan posts pictures with Louis outside the studio (pics here and here).

Louis posts a video for BSL “sign of the day” challenge (link). Isabella Signs says that all she did to get Louis to film the video of him signing “singer” in BSL was ask him (link).

More articles about hot shirtless Harry Styles kissing Olivia in Italy.

Articles about Jason throwing the 1st pitch at a baseball game with his kids come out.

July 10 (Sat): Louis is seen with Oli and hot Luke at a EURO soccer village in London drinking beer and having fun. A fan reports that he smelled gooooood (pics here, here, here, here, here, here and here; videos here, here and here).

Some articles about Holivia kissing in Italy and Jason with the kids at the baseball game.

July 11 (Sun): Louis is seen attending the EURO final at Wembley with Eleanor (pics), and spotted walking among fans in the streets of London (video and pics here).

Article about Jason and Keeley being a couple.

July 12 (Mon): Exclusive 369 merch is sent out to fans (link).

Articles about Ted Lasso’s “overwhelming” reception.

July 13 (Tue): Jason is the cover of GQ and he confirms he and Onlivia broke up in November 2020, that he hit rock bottom, but has “chosen to land like an Avanger” and is moving on and “not heartbroken”. He says he “still doesn’t have clarity” in regards to their breakup. He also got 20 Emmy nominations for Ted Lasso, which were announced today in a move of HIGHLY calculated timing and PR (link).

July 14 (Wed): Love On Tour is rescheduled to start September 2nd 2021 only in the US. Canada dates are cancelled (link here, and here).

Louis’ DC and NY tour dates are rescheduled (they had been rescheduled a long time ago but many fans didn’t notice) (link).

Articles about Jason’s GQ interview - focus is on his split from Olivia.

July 15 (Thur): Harry likes Gemma’s post on IG (link).

Article about Olivia being focused on co-parenting and how she’ll always do what’s best for her kids (link).

Jason attends the Ted Lasso premiere in LA.

July 16 (Fri): Olivia is papped going to the gym in NY (link).

Deuxmoi expands on trashy tabloid rumors that Holivia getting engaged/married in Italy is a real possibility (link).

Articles about the rumor that Harry and Olivia got married in Italy.

Articles about Jason attending Ted Lasso’s premiere on the 15th, wearing a shirt supporting black English soccer players who faced racist abuse after England’s EUROs loss (article link).

Articles about Jason wearing a bracelet his daughter made him that spells out “daddy” to the Ted Lasso premiere (article link).

July 17 (Sat): Harry is papped arriving in LA (video and pics here).

Jojo pics says a friend saw Harry getting his covid-19 vaccine in London (link).

Fans post a video of them meeting Louis at the beach (video and pics here and here). Another fan claims Louis was close to her work (link).

Eleanor posts picture where Louis’ leg can be seen at a rocky beach (link).

Olivia and her daughter get their nails done in NY  according to Deuxmoi (link). Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ post about Olivia being seen at the Fort Greene farmers market in NY (link).

Articles about Jason wearing a shirt supporting black English soccer players. 

July 18 (Sun): Articles about Ted Lasso.

July 19 (Mon): Olivia is papped arriving in LA, pics and video are released. In the video they ask her about ‘online rumors’ that her and Harry already got married, and what her ring size is. She replies that she isn’t “ever gonna talk to you guys” (link). Article is also released (link).

Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ post about Olivia with her daughter Daisy getting their nails done in NY allegedly on the 17th. They claim they could see both of them smile (even tho they were wearing masks) and dance to WS and her daughter mentions Harry (link).

Jason is papped arriving in NYC with an avocado plush toy after being away on a Ted Lasso press tour (article link). And more articles about Ted Lasso.

July 20 (Tue): Deuxmoi posts story claiming that Holivia “are very serious” and that “word is they’ve talked about” getting engaged/married. She also posted a story about Jeff Azoff (link).

Jason is papped wearing a tie-dye sweater in NY and goes on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert (link). More articles about Ted Lasso and Jason’s anti-racism support.

July 21 (Wed): Article drops clarifying Jason is not dating Keeley and is, in fact, single, and seen out at a bar with friends and model Irina Shayk (link). More articles about Ted Lasso and Jason’s anti-racism support, as well as articles about Jason playing with puppies on GQ.

Articles about Olivia “responding to Harry Styles marriage rumors”.

July 22 (Thur): Louis says on Twitter that he lost his phone during the EUROs, and tweets from an Iphone (link here and here).

Eleanor posts video of Bruce swimming at the pool in Louis’ public house and a picture of herself at the house (link).

Olivia is papped getting coffee in LA (link).

Articles about Olivia “responding to Harry Styles marriage rumors”.

Jason goes on the Today show. More articles about Ted Lasso and Jason’s anti-racism support.

July 23 (Fri): One Direction’s 11th anniversary! Louis thanks fans on twitter (link).

Unseen video of One Direction, shot by Cal Aurand in 2012 is released (video link).

Article about Olivia getting coffee in LA on the 22nd drops (link).

Olivia posts a picture on her IG story at the Dumbo Soho House and says that DWD is nearing the end of picture-lock (link). Picture is likely old.

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 24 (Sat): More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 25 (Sun): LTHQ announces a giveaway for Walls vinyls (link).

Fan posts screenshots of Harry’s knees in Italy likely between June 18-30th 2021 (link).

Deuxmoi posts a ‘spotted’ post about Olivia getting coffee in LA on the 22nd (link).

Olivia is papped alone in LA (link).

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 26 (Mon): Deuxmoi posts about Olivia facetiming Harry from a coffee shop in NYC using her back camera, calling her a “boomer” (link).

Article about Olivia being seen alone in LA, and how she’s working on coparenting with Jason, and that she’ll do whatever it takes for her kids. Pics likely from the 25th (link).

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 27 (Tue): “Article” exclusive with US Weekly about Holivia being so free and having an “ease” to their relationship - justifying them spending little time together (link).

Article calling Olivia a boomer for facetiming with her back camera.

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 28 (Wed): Louis drops his “summer drop” merch (link).

The Xfactor gets permanently cancelled (link).

More articles about Ted Lasso.

July 29 (Thur): Louis announces The Away from Home Festival in London (link). Articles about The Away From Home Festival (link, link).

July 30 (Fri): Louis liked tweets by bands ‘Johnny Took’ and ‘The Lathums’ (link).

Articles about The Away From Home Festival (link, link, link).

Walls reentered the Official Charts (link).

“Article” about Harry being “obsessed” with his relationship with Olivia and turning into her puppy dog who follows her everywhere (link).

Olivia is pictured in NY via her and her PA’s IG stories (pics).

July 31 (Sat): Harry is spotted in a coffee shop in LA in the morning. He is with his friends Reesh (srilankansunshine) and Al Shearer (pics and video links).

Deuxmoi reposts screenshot and video of Harry at the coffee shop. As well as a message from someone claiming that Harry was working on new music at a studio (link).

Deuxmoi posts (on Aug 1) a ‘spotted’ reel in which Olivia is seen with her kids at Empire Diner in Chelsea NY, as well as walking with her kids there (link). Jason was seen at a baseball game in NY. Dates are uncertain, alleged to be the 31st, but could be 26-31st.

#july 2021 timeline #larry july 2021 #holivia july 2021 timeline #elounor july 2021 timeline #holivia #eleano #harry july 2021 timeline #louis july 2021 timeline #jul 2021 #mine #jason sudeikis #jason july 2021 timeline #long post

[cherryatiny]

𝙲𝚑𝚎𝚎𝚛 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚞𝚜 - 𝙲.𝚂 & 𝚂.𝙼𝙶

⩥𝙿𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐: 𝚓𝚘𝚌𝚔!𝙲𝚑𝚘𝚒 𝚂𝚊𝚗 (𝙰𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚣) 𝚡 𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚏!𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚡 𝚓𝚘𝚌𝚔!𝚂𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝙼𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚒 (𝙰𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚣)

⩥𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎: 𝚜𝚖𝚞𝚝, 𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚐𝚎 𝙰𝚄

⩥𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝: 𝟸,𝟺𝚔

⩥𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢: 𝚆𝚑𝚊𝚝'𝚜 𝚊 𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚝𝚘 𝚌𝚎𝚕𝚎𝚋𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚖'𝚜 𝚟𝚒𝚌𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚊 𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚘𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚕𝚊𝚙 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚛𝚘𝚘𝚖𝚜?

⩥𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐: 𝚍𝚘𝚖!𝚜𝚊𝚗, 𝚍𝚘𝚖!𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚒, 𝚜𝚞𝚋!𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚎𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎, 𝚎𝚡𝚑𝚒𝚋𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚒𝚜𝚖, 𝚙𝚞𝚋𝚕𝚒𝚌 𝚜𝚎𝚡, 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚜𝚎𝚡, 𝚋𝚕𝚘𝚠𝚓𝚘𝚋, 𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚝 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚢, 𝚌𝚕𝚒𝚝 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚢, 𝚍𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚢 𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚔, 𝚗𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚍𝚎𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗/𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚚𝚞𝚒𝚗𝚝, 𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚗 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚜

⩥𝚃𝚊𝚐 𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝: @galaxteez @gyubaby @frankenstein852 @bobateastay @aurianaaaa

☆→★→☆→★→☆→★→☆→★→☆→★→☆→★→

„Wow, immaculate, Choi scored yet another goal, Choi is in his best form ever this season, to be honest, I'm kinda curious, what or who helped him develop such confidence on the field. Looks like the other team won't be able to score 3 or more goals to win, so we can be almost 100% sure that today's winner is the home team.”

Loud cheers and clapping sounds were hearable at the university's soccer field, where the team's sensation Choi, brought the team to yet another victory. Finishing the last 10 minutes of the game with the difference of two goals, all the team's members ran over to the aforementioned male, patting him on the back along with saying phrases that only boosted his confidence.

Choi San was the typical school athlete. The popular guy everyone knew when he walked through the school's corridors, the guy every girl wanted to date and every boy wanted to be. The type of guy to not really care about his academic results, because he knew his talent in sports would make him successful in life. If he didn't train on the soccer field, you would for sure catch him fucking random girls at his friends' parties.

But that changed slightly when the poor cheerleader caught his eyes.

Finishing the choreography off with a triple headspring, the girl in question stood there with her arms in high V, to match with other cheerleaders in her team that in the meanwhile did a pyramid. The fans that sat on the bleachers in front of them cheered, as the girl tried to catch her breath from the stunts they pulled while the team played. As she was about to finally leave the field and go home to prepare herself some tasty meal, two strong arms wrapped around her, picking her up into a hug. It was no one other than San who picked her up, as his beaning smile soon turned into a cocky smirk. „Put me the fuck down, Choi.”

„Aww, don't be so grumpy my little vixen, I'm the best player in our school's team and I won the game for us once again, shouldn't you be thrilled about such an amazing guy showing you affection?” Rolling her eyes at him, she grasped out of his embrace, falling back onto her feet on the ground, as she picked up the bag with her clothes to change into, since the cheerleading uniform that consisted of a top that hardly covered her chest and a short skirt, weren't the best option to go home dressed in.

„Not so fast Y/N, where are you going at this hour? The night is still young, besides, shouldn't we celebrate the victory? You know how much that little costume of yours riles me up. Fuck I'm not sure if I can wait any longer, should I fuck my little cheerleader behind the bleachers or in the changing room?” His arm wrapped around her waist pulling the cheerleader closer to him. Hand going lower, down her spine to her bare thighs, going under the skirt and groping her ass, San bent down to whisper into her ear.

„The guys will go celebrate right away, so the changing room will be there just for the two of us. Come in 15 minutes, you already know the way.“ The young jock left her standing there, in the middle of the soccer field that was slowly emptying itself. „Here we go again, he better buys me dinner after this.“ murmured the girl as she was making her way to the soccer team's changing room. It was always like this. The two of them fucked after every match or whenever they wanted to, but apart from that, they didn't even acknowledge each other in school and acted like they were strangers.

Going through the calm hallway, she opened the door to the changing room at the end of the hallway. The room was already emptied out of the team members. The wetness in the room from the usage of the shower and the odour of sweat immediately hit her nose. „You guys should try opening the windows sometimes, it stinks here.“ Complained Y/N as she approached the shirtless male who was sitting on the bench, staring at his locker. Standing up to look at her, Y/N was met with the sight of his sculpted abs, she loved that much. „Soon enough, it won't stink of sweat, but sex, babe.“ Said smirking San as he walked closer to her, not wanting to spend any more time, his lips attached to her bare neck right away.

„How many times do I have to remind you to stop calling me babe, San.“ declared Y/N in between her lustful moans. „I don't think I want to stop,...babe.“ not stopping the movement of his lips on her neck, he tugged her closer to him, walking backwards to the wooden bench he previously sat on. Pressing her back against the cold metal lockers. Y/N's arms roamed over his exposed stomach and chest, caressing his muscles with her fingertips.

San rolled the top that covered her chest up, her breasts being exposed to him. He broke the connection between his lips and her neck and attached them to her hardening nipples. Sucking on her right breast, his palm paying attention to the other one, as he covered her chest with purplish hickeys, that marked her as his. „Your tits are even prettier now that they are covered in my marks. You should walk like this, without a shirt around the school so everyone would see the marks and know who's fucking our main cheerleader, don't you think?“ Groping them and pressing them against each other, he observed his creation in amazement as the girl moaned under his touch. His hand went under her skirt, pulling her safety shorts down to her ankles, she stepped out of them.

San tugged her panties to the side, his fingers traced her entrance while he devoured her mouth. Pressing onto her clit with his thumb, he pushed two of his long fingers into her wet hole, stretching her as he spread them, to prep her. Breaking the deep kiss, they were breathing heavily, trying to catch their breath from the intense kiss. San opened his locker, searching for the box of condoms he kept there for situations like this.

Sitting down onto the bench, he stripped off his sweatpants and briefs, focused on rolling the condom on his length. Spreading his legs widely, he motioned with his fingers for her to come up to him. Turning her around, so her back faced him, he grasped her ass. His hands spreading her ass cheeks, looking at the wetness leaking out of her. „Looks like I've made your wet cunt waiting for too long, cuz you're dripping. Come and sit on this cock, after all, you know what to do, your slutty hole did it many times.“

Pulling her to him by her waist, he sat her down on his lap, positioning his tip leaking of precum to her entrance throbbing out of the arousal she felt. San never failed to arouse her with just a simple touch, she slept with some other people in her life, but it wasn't like this with them, San was just... different. Whether it was his team captain Hongjoong or his shy (not so shy in bed) teammate Yeosang, she always came back to San for more. He was the drug she got addicted to.

Without much warning, he slipped into her entrance with ease, forcing a couple of moans to leave her mouth from the delicate feeling of San's girth stretching her velvet walls. San let out a few quiet groans as he pushed her hips onto his length.

Moving Y/N by her hips up and down onto him with the pace of his liking, it was harder and harder for the girl to comprehend herself. Her knuckles turning white from clutching the edge of the wooden bench they were fucking on. Her skirt still covering the place where the two of them connected, as their skins continued to smack against each other. The arm wrapped around her body held her close to San, as he nibbled on her ear lobe. Hand roaming over her body and playing with her hard nipples.

Unaware of the pair of ears in the room that could hear them, San never stopped in his thrusts, knowing well what to do to make the cheerleader in his lap break from the pleasure he could give her. Mingi, who was in the changing room for the past few minutes, on the other hand, didn't know what to do at all. Should he leave before they see him and forget about the sweatshirt he forgot? Should he wait until they finish or should he approach them in the middle of their intercourse?

However, the solution to his dilemma was found when he accidentally bumped his foot into the tinplate material of the lockers. The sound resonating in the room and alerting the couple that was lost in their pleasure. „Who's there?!” asked San with an annoyed and somehow angry voice at the disturber of his victory's celebration. Rubbing his temple nervously, San's teammate Mingi came out of his previous spot behind the lockers.

As soon as he approached the two of them, his whole face flushed into a reddish tint, cheeks burning from the embarrassment. His eyes widened as he locked contact with Y/N's breasts covered in San's marks. Unable to comprehend any coherent sentence, he stood there, not knowing what to say, hoping the older teammate would say something instead. „Come on Mingi, I'm waiting for your explanation on why have you been eavesdropping on us. Did you forget something? Or have you decided to rather celebrate the victory with me and my little fucktoy?”

„I-I forg-got my sweatshirt...” murmured Mingi quietly, his head lowered down, so he doesn't have to face the exposed cheerleader he yearned for many endless nights spent with his dick in his hand, imagining it was her giving him a handjob. And now she was there, displayed for him. Unfortunately not for him, but for his friend and teammate San. „The look in your eyes told me that you were relieved to have forgotten your hoodie. Do you like how her tits look covered in my hickeys? I can see how you eye them..”

„I- no- I wasn't looking I swear I didn't know you and Y/N were a thing... I swear I wasn't looking at her, San.” San chuckled at how defensive Mingi was being, trying hard to deny everything. „You weren't looking? Then why don't you look? Don't you want to see her perfect tits? If I were you I would use the opportunity.” San only let out yet another chuckle when the male he was talking to, lifted his head lightly, looking at the girl's exposed breasts freely.

„Do you want to join us too? I'm sure my little vixen wouldn't mind having her mouth shut with your dick. Her slutty cunt is already taking my cock and it's such a pity I won't let you experience the amazing feeling of her wet hole clenching around you, but her mouth will gladly take you. I can feel her clenching around me because of that idea.”

Y/N didn't know why it was like that, but San talking about her as if she wasn't even there aroused her even more than she thought was possible. Normally, she would have been shy in a situation like this, but a flame of confidence sparked in her. „Yes Mingi, I need someone to shut my mouth, if you don't want to, I can look for another one of your teammates, I'm sure they'd be more grateful than you...“ Teasing him with her words, she tried to make him agree to this, and she knew he would, after all, the obvious stares he gave her when he passed their training didn't go unnoticed by her. „I- yes, I want to... I've been wanting to shut your pesky mouth so much.“

Approaching the two figures on the bench, Mingi with a particularly harsh tug gripped her hair into a makeshift ponytail, tugging on it to make her look at him, as she was still seated on San's lap, clenching around his length in her. Parting her lips for him obediently as he tugged down the same team sweatpants San previously had. Mingi and San locked eye contact, it was as if they communicated thanks to it since they started moving unexpectedly for her, in the same pace and rhythm, their movements synchronised. As San started thrusting from underneath her, his arms gripping around her to pull her back closer to his chest, hands fondling with her breasts, as he lightly pinched and twirled her purplish turning nipples. Mingi's grip tightened around her hair, allowing him to control her better as she bobbed her head on his dick at a rapid pace. Tears were forming in her eyes as he bucked his hips deeper into her, the tip of his dick hitting the back of her throat.

„Fuck, your mouth is taking me so well, should have fucked you sooner if I knew it'd be this easy. Such a good cock-sucker you are, I guess we should reward you with making you cum.“ Leaning closer to her, Mingi's hand reached to the place where Y/N and San connected. Parting her lips as she was sinking down on San's cock, his thumb played with her sensitive clit. Twirling and pinching the bundle of nerves between his fingers, he pressed onto it, adding to the pleasure Y/N was feeling. The moans that were meant to leave her mouth were muffled by Mingi's cock in her mouth, the vibration bringing him closer to his high as the bucking of his hips got irregular. The same goes for the twitching cock of the older boy in her core.

The both of them didn't stop their movements trying to reach the well-deserved orgasm. Y/N shaking uncontrollably on San's lap as the tip of his dick grazed against her g-spot and Mingi's work on her clit pulled an orgasm out of her. San emptied himself into the condom when Mingi filled Y/N's mouth full of his seed. Some droplets of it, leaking out of her mouth and running down her chin as she swallowed the rest of his cum. All three of them breathing heavily from the intense session they went through in the team's changing room.

San's cocky voice was the first one to break the comfortable silence. „Fuck, this was a hell of a celebration. Why don't we arrange something with the other boys next time? I think they'd love it. Maybe I should make you ride my abs and the I'll let the boys have as many rounds with you, as the number it takes you to get yourself off on my abs...“

#ateez #ateez san #ateez mingi #ateez smut #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez fanfiction #ateez san fanfic #ateez mingi fanfic #ateez san scenarios #ateez mingi scenarios #ateez san smut #ateez mingi smut #choi san imagines #song mingi imagines #choi san fanfic #song mingi fanfic #choi san scenarios #song mingi scenarios #choi san #song mingi #choi san fanfiction #song mingi fanfiction #choi san smut #song mingi smut

[kittydemon9000]

Alright so I know Literally Nobody asked for this but the idea of leaguers having differnt armor types, speeds, and strengths is so fascinating to me so here’s an entire post about my headcanons about it, staring the Main 7 since they’re the ones we see most and have the most evidence for. 

Also, please keep in mind that this is completely made based on memory alone and it’s been a bit since I last saw the show. If I missed something or remembered something wrong feel free to correct me or add your own thoughts.

Also also, I made a chart (the chart is based on the strongest for the leaguer, not out of all of them, ex: Top Joy’s strongest is different from GZ’s strongest)

First off, the leader of Silver Castle himself, Magnum Ace, a Baseball Leaguer. Right off the bat(hah puns) I immediately knew his arms would be the strongest points. He seems to have been created with him being a pitcher in mind and his 44 Sonic has clearly been shown to posses a lot of power which he would need the strength to handle. There’s also how he was shown to be a decent hitter in Gold Arm’s flashback, sending every ball into the outfield. As for his weakest points, they were also pretty easy. The joints are a bit of a constant with all of the leaguers I showed, but the fins are because they seem to be rather thin and probably can’t hold up very well under pressure. There’s also the shoulder joints, which I wasn’t able to put on the diagram, since as shown during the end of the series, if Magnum repeatedly pitches his 44 Sonic without rest the stress on his shoulders start to cause them to break down, to the point where he was forced to sit out for the next few days for repairs. Speed wise Magnum is nothing special and in my eyes pretty average amongst the team.

Next up, we have Mach Windy, a Soccer Leaguer. Similar to Magnum, I knew almost immediately his strongest point would be his legs since, y’know, soccer. Everything(physical) we see coming from Windy is almost always centered around his leg strength and speed. This is outright said when Silver Castle is resting after some baseball training and Magnum tells Windy(I shit you not) “We believe in your leg.” There’s also his Mach Spin which depends entirely on his ability to kick to ball at an extremely high speed. There’s also a scene when trying to help Gold Foot during the Forced Retirement Arc where his kicks a ball of solid rock without any issues. The scene also brings me to why his head is a strong point. Heading is also something Windy has been shown to be able to do, and referencing the Forced Retirement Arc again where he head butts the aforementioned ball of rock. For speed, as mentioned before, when it comes to running Windy seems to be the fastest amongst Silver Castle. The weakness I feel is pretty self explanatory since soccer doesn’t really require use of your arms unless you’re a goalie. There’s also how in the Jet Setter episode Bull sees Windy loose an arm wrestle almost immediatly with Ryuuken, but that might just be since Ryuuken is ridiculously powerful. As for durability, he seems to be not very strong, instead having lighter armor for more speed.

Speaking of Ryuuken, let’s talk about the Karate Leaguer. As you can see, his strongest part is his armor, aka almost all of him. As a karate leaguer, Ryuuken was probably created with the intent of being able to take a lot of hits. There’s also the running joke of a member of another team attacking him with all their power and him not budging and saying something along the lines of “I feel nothing.” Strength wise, we get a taste of his crazy power is during his first spotlight episode where he was practicing kicking with Windy, to which he accidentally broke the stone wall surrounding the field. He then unlocks more of his power when rescuing Ruri from the factory, but we don’t see his real power until the Forced Retirment arc. There we got to see when going to rescue Magnum, Windy, and the Gold Bros how he opened a literal chasm into the ground with a single punch, though I can’t remember if it was rock, metal, or both, but that’s still pretty impressive, and that was before he unlocked his Heart Kit in the Death Football Arc which only increased his power. And then during the OVA when the Fighter Brothers try to fight Windy’s new team and they use their pitch, a pitch that nobody had been able to hit before, Ryuuken straight up punches it with seemingly no backlash and getting a home run all because they made him mad.….maybe it’s a good thing Ryuuken is so innocent and calm. Speed wise, Ryuuken seems to be on the slower side of the team, however I do think Ryuuken(alongside Juurouta) would have the best reflexes. This one is completely headcanon and I don’t have much proof, it just makes sense to me.

Next up, we have Bull Armor, a Football Leaguer. His armor and helmet are easily his strongest parts, for mostly obvious reasons. Multiple times throughout the series he is seen tanking blows that would normally knock another leaguer to the ground, most notably when he’s Silver Castle’s goalkeeper in soccer and catcher in baseball. However, his durability seems to be different from Ryuuken’s since he is still moved by the attacks but can bounce back from more. His durability seems to be pretty tied to his strength too since he is one of the only leaguers who has been shown to catch Magnum’s 44 Sonic. There’s also how when he was first introduced he stopped and lifted a truck much larger than himself with relative ease in order to stop it from hitting a young boy. His speed however is admittedly a bit harder to figure out. He seems to be much larger and heavier, however as shown when he lost control in his past he still has the ability to charge down opponents at a speed in which they can’t properly evade, though it’s up for debate whether they were trying to properly evade or trying to reason with him.

Juurouta, a Kendo Leaguer, is next. His durability is more basic compared to the others, mostly focusing around his Armor Armor(no that was not a typo). Said Armor Armor also seems to be protecting the joints which may or may not be intentional, but I’m going with it. His fins share the same logic with Magnum, as do his joints with everyone else. His strength mostly seems to be localized in his arms, which makes sense since he is a kendo leaguer. His strength was first shown in comparison to the others when he was the first person to hit Gold Arm’s Genocide Screw with a hit(discounting Bull since he technically kicked it). There’s also how in the Arctic he was able to cut down the  blizzard machine, however that spent all his energy. Speed wise I think he’s in a similar i boat to Ryuuken: slow overall, but incredible reflexes.

Now, Top Joy, a Basketball Leaguer, was a fun one to do for no reason more than I like the character. Strength wise, nothing very impressive, he show much. Durability though….it’s not the best. The only points that seemed to be able to hold up were his arms(sort of) and feet, and they’re less based on actual proof and more on logical thinking but I digress. Hand and arms because he’ll need to be able to catch balls thrown his way, but they’re still relatively weak compared to other members of Silver Castle. I highlighted his feet because they would probably be needed to make they don’t break once Top Joy lands after jumping high. If they were weak the repeated slamming into the ground would cause them to break and then Top Joy(and any other basketball leaguer) would be relatively stuck. But where I think Top Joy shines is his speed and maneuverability. As he has demonstrated many times throughout baseball and soccer games alike, his spring legs can be used in a variety of situations, from avoiding attacking players to catching balls that would normally be too far out of reach. And there’s also the possibility of using the force from the spring to propel himself faster when running, thought it’s unclear if he does this already. However, they are not without weakness. As shown in the episode with Gebara, they are easily damaged when seemingly a single coil is damaged and prevents him from walking without assistance from his teammates. There’s also his recording equipment and speakers which, while functional, seem like they would also be damaged rather easily since as someone who has worked with recording/video equipment, I am all too aware of how fragile it can be. Also another note, Top Joy also seems to have an incredibly high pain tolerance. When the members of Section X give him a warning shock with the shock circuit, he pleads with them and says how he “doesn’t like punishment,” implying this has happened before. There’s also his questionable relationship with his past team and much later in the Death Football Arc when he flat out says “I’m used to pain,” which in concerning to say the least.

And finally, last but most certainly not least, we have GZ, a Hockey Leaguer. Similar to Ryuuken, GZ has been shown to be incredibly powerful and being able to take a lot. There are three times where his power is shown. First is barely a day after he joins their team when he defends his teammates from attacks that would normally knock them off their feet(sans Ryuuken). The second time is when he’s babysitting the kids and survives an avalanche that took out another group of hockey(?) leaguers with barely a scratch. And then in the OVA where he’s able to deflect almost all of Garret’s dive bomb attacks without took much trouble. This is undoubtedly a combination of some hockey leaguers being incredibly defensive(like Thunderbolt) and his reformatting which led him to be a mercenary. We don’t seem too much from GZ in terms of strength, so I’m going to say he’s just a little weaker than Magnum. Speed though, that one was a bit hard to figure out. Main because of his boosters. His boosters give him an enormous speed boost, fast enough to get ahead of Garret who was literally flying and dive bombing, and on the ice without as much friction it only increases his speed. However, the few times we see him running, he seems to be slower than the other Silver Castle members, likely because of his weight and how he was meant for ice, not land. 

TL:DR, From most to least

Durability: GZ, Ryuuken, Bull Armor, Juurouta, Magnum, Windy, Top Joy

Strength: Ryuuken, Bull Armor, Juurouta, Magnum, GZ, Top Joy, Windy

Speed: GZ(with boosters/on ice), Windy, Top Joy, Magnum, Bull Armor, Ryuuken, Juurouta, GZ(running), but Juurouta and Ryuuken have the best reflexes

#Shippu! Iron Leaguer #iron leaguer #magnum ace #mach windy #windy #ryuuken #Kiai Ryuuken #bull armor #juurouta #Kiwami Juurouta #topjoy #Top Joy #gz #info dump

[sweettomyhoney]

Soccer Team -Andre Burakovsky

Request: No.

Authors note: Another old writing 🙂

Warning: None

Ps: Request are open

—————————————

Since Hockey season was over for Andre this meant soccer season started for you. You were the coach for the boys’ pre teen soccer league that was part of the local high school. You played soccer from a young age but it was nothing too serious, just something you did for fun.

“ Hey Andre, I was going to head to the field early,” you said walking into yours and Andres shared bedroom.

“Oh Babe, I wanted to talk to you about that” Andre said darting in from the bathroom

“I was wondering if I could come with you today and maybe help you out” Andre continued

“I’m completely fine with you coming, but sorry to break this to you but you suck at soccer, ” you said laughing.

“I do not suck at soccer, I think I’m pretty good a juggling” he protested

“Yes you are good at juggling, but the last time we went to visit your family you got crossed up, and almost broke your ankle when you played with the neighborhood kids ” you responded.

“Hey, I have to admit that kid was pretty good,” he said wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Andre, the kid was your 6-year-old next door neighbor that started playing a week before we visited.” You said to bringing him in for a kiss.

“He was a natural,” Andre said walking over to the bed to put his shoes on.

“Anyway, I think the boys would enjoy having you around. We better get going or we are going to be late” you said looking at the clock on the wall.

It took about 15 minutes to get to the high school’s soccer field. Andre got the bags out of the car and helped you set up the cones for the first drill.

A few minutes later the boys started to show up.

“ Guys, what I want you to do is to gear up and then pop a squat on the 50-yard, line, I have a surprise for you guys.” You said to them

“ Coach y/l/n what’s the surprise,” one of your kids asked you.

“ Well, it would not be a surprise if I told you Jake know would it ?” You responded with a smile.

Andre was getting the final things out of the car when you finally got all of your players in a circle.

“ Boys settle down, I have something important to say,” you said over their talking

“ Today we have someone that will be joining us who is very important to you and to me, but first I have a question. how many of yall play hockey or watch hockey?” You asked.

Over half of the team raised their hands. You were about to continue speaking when you saw your team’s eyes get very wide and their mouths drop open. At this point, you knew that they were looking at Andre.

“ Coach y/l/n, I got the ball bag out of the car, can we start practicing now,” Andre said handing you the bag.

“Boys I would like you to meet Andre Burakovsky, he will be joining practice with you guys today, so start warming up,” you said containing your laughter.

“Bro your like so cool, I can’t believe this is happening” you hear Liam and Jake say while running with Andre.

“Burakovsky pick up the pace,” you said jokingly causing the rest of the boys to laugh.

Throughout practice, Andre did a pretty good job keeping up being that he was a pro athlete and all. The practice was almost over, so now it was time for the real challenge.

“Boys bring it in,” you said calling your team over.

“ We have 20 minutes left of practice so I was thinking we should play Power and Finesse.” You continued causing the kids to cheer with excitement.

“ What is power and Finesse?” Andre asked confused.

“ Power and Finesse is a shooting game. There is 2 goalies and 2 Captains. The captain will divide the team up by numbers then stand by the goal. They will roll you two balls, the first one you have to hit with power and the second one you have to finesse the goalie. Power and Finesse.” Luke explained.

“ Also, if you miss both of your attempts you are out and have to stand behind the goal. If you catch a ball that went over the net you can go back in.” You continued.

“ Don’t forget about the challenges, if you hit both of the balls into the net you get to challenge a player on the other team,” Tyler added.

You and one of the team captains Tyler divide up the players. Andre was, of course, on Tyler’s team and you were the captain of the opposite team. One by one you and Tyler’s teams flipped flopped turns going. When it was finally Andres turn to go. By surprise, Andre hit both balls into the net resulting in a challenge.

“ Captain Y/N, I challenge you” Andre screamed while pointing at you.

You only hit one ball into the goal causing your team to lose, by this time practice was over and the boys had taken their cool down lap.

“ Coach, how do you know Andre btw?” Tyler asked you

“ Well, me and coach y/l/n have been dating for about a year now,” Andre said kissing the top of your head.

“ Do you love each other? Are you guys going to get married?” Luke said wiggling his eyebrows

“ yes I love him very much ……..and maybe” you replied.

“ Well, I guess there goes my sister’s chances with you,” Jake said causing the whole team to laugh.

Soon the boys were gone and it was just you and Andre.

“ Did you mean it when you said you would marry me?” Andre asks while putting his head on your shoulder.

“ Yes the way you acted with them was amazing and made me realize even more how lucky I am to have you,” you said cuddling Andre in closer.

“ I love you vacker,” Andre said kissing you again.

“ Love you too goofball” you responded.

________________

vacker- Beautiful

#andre burakovsky imagine #washington capitals #Washington capitals imagines #nhl imagine #nhl smut #nhl blurbs #colorado avalanche #Colorado avalanche imagines #nhl imagines #andre burakovsky

[multi-fxndom446]

You’re Somebody Else

Atsumu Miya X Reader

Warning: possible trigger warning, cussing, assholes, and angst

Word count: 3.7k

Summary: you grew up with Atsumu but he changed getting into highschool and not for the better.

You’re Somebody Else pt2

~

I saw the part of you that only when you’re older you will see too.

You knew Miya Atsumu better then anyone. Sometimes you thought you even knew him better then his own twin. Growing up with him you learned pretty quickly that he liked to show off, but under it all he was a very kind person.

That proved correct whenever he would protect you from mean girls in middle school or when you were little and he shared his toys with you. He took care of you.

It shocked quite a few people on multiple occasions when they saw how he was with you.

I held the better cards but every stroke of luck has gotta bleed through. Its gotta bleed through.

You held the balance of the time that only blindly I could read you.

But I could read you.

“Atsumu come on. You’ve had enough for today.” He ignored you and continued to practice. He was getting ready to try out to be on the highschool volleyball team and for some reason he thought they would reject him.

You watched him for a few more minutes before you decided you had enough. When you grabbed the ball from his grasp he was shocked, he didn’t even notice you walk over to him. “Atsumu. You need to rest.”

“I’m not tired Y/n just a while longer.” He was lying and he knew that you could see right through him. He was like an open book when it came to you. “Please.”

“You won’t make it on the team if you injure yourself practicing.” He knew you only meant the best for him but what you were saying was striking a nerve.

When you walked away from him to clean up he finally snapped.

It’s like you told me go forward slowly it’s not a race to the end.

“Y/n! I’m fine!” His voice caused you to stop. You didn’t turn to him yet but he didn’t care. “If you don’t let me practice I won’t get on the team!”

“Atsumu!” His eyes widened in shock, you never raised your voice at him. “You will get on the team so I don’t know why you’re worried.”

The two of you stared at each other almost as if to challenge the other one to speak again. “You’re done for today. Your brother left hours ago and you should’ve gone with him so now I’m here telling you. You are done.”

He didn’t say anything after that, just watched you pick up the discarded volleyballs and put the cart away. You had been there so many times you knew exactly where the cart went and what got cleaned up everyday.

Finally he followed after you to grab the broom and help you clean up the rest of the gym. “I’m just worried.” He told you, half way through cleaning the gym.

“About what?”

“This could determine my career after highschool too. I need to get into a good school.” You paused your movements to look over at him. He stopped to but wouldn’t look you in the eyes so you dropped the broom you were holding to walk over to him.

You put your hand on his arm gently and he tightened his grip on the broom. “Atsumu,” your voice was soft, he loved your voice when it was soft. “You don’t need to think so far ahead.”

He finally looked down at you, even for a middle schooler he towered over you. “You’re an amazing volleyball player and you will go far but please think one step at a time. I don’t want you to hurt yourself by pushing yourself to hard.”

His eyes searched yours and like always he could only see the sincerity in them and the kindness you always showed him even when people told you he was a bad person. Finally he dropped the broom and wrapped his arms around you and you did the same, relishing in the warmth he gave off.

“Now let’s finish cleaning I’m sure your mom is wondering where you are.” You joked lightly, smiling to yourself when he chuckled. He pulled away from you and picked up his broom as you went back to yours, he watched you go before he continued on.

Well you look like yourself but you’re somebody else only it ain’t on the surface

“Atsumu. How did we get here?” You both were outside the gym just right by the doors while his team was stretching inside. There were a few passerby’s but they ignored you both.

“What do you mean?” He always tried to push this off. Every time you brought up what was wrong he deflected it or just left.

You almost felt like crying, he didn’t even look like he cared at all. “You know what I mean! How did we end up here?!” He couldn’t look you in the eyes especially when you yelled. You seemed to do that more after you both got into highschool. He hated it. He hated it even more that he was the reason why.

Both of your first years in highschool was okay. He made the volleyball team like you knew he would but he changed just a little bit. You ignored it but by the end of your first year he was an awful cocky ass just like everyone told you, the difference this time though was that you couldn’t see where they were wrong.

He got caught into a bad group of friends a bunch of the cocky athletes that played different sports none of them from volleyball. Even though he was friends with his volleyball team he was with these other guys all the time and starting your second year he was always with them.

“I knew growing up where I stood. I was your best friend. But now we’re here and I don’t know what you want from me!” You hissed, shoving his shoulder slightly. “You make me feel like you like me as more, then you treat me like shit, then you act as if I’m just a side piece.”

He was still silent and finally the tears were rolling down your cheeks and you shoved him again but he grabbed your shoulders to stop you from doing it again. “Say something!”

Your head fell on his chest and it muffled your sobs as you clutched onto his shirt. He could see how white your knuckles were turning just from how tight you were holding onto him. He opened his mouth to say something but stopped short when he heard familiar laughing coming his way.

Well you talk like yourself no, I hear someone else though now you’re making me nervous.

He pushed you away and even he was almost saddened when he saw you weren’t even that shocked. When your eyes saw the group of athletes you knew you should’ve left right then but you didn’t.

“Atsumu!” One of them called out to him and he waved back at them. You stared at him, seeing his demeanor completely change. “Whoa what’s happening here?”

“Oh nothing she was just crying cause I broke up with her.” Broke up with you? You looked at him in disbelief, you weren’t even dating to begin with.

“She didn’t even know she was the side?” A guy, you didn’t care to know, laughed. He was from the soccer team and that’s all you knew. He turned to you a cocky grin in place, “are you clueless?”

You looked at him in disbelief before you turned to Atsumu, who you thought would defend you but when you saw his smirk you scoffed at your own self. “I don’t know what I expected out of you. I hope you have a great life.” Then you started walking.

“Don’t come crawling back when you need someone to hook up with.” Atsumu called out to you and you didn’t even stop walking, just turned around and walked backwards.

“Don’t worry. I won’t. Especially not to you.” Then you were gone and he watched you go. His heart hurt when he couldn’t see you in his sight anymore but he pretended it didn’t get to him.

“Atsumu let’s go practice is starting.” Osamu was the one to grab him, narrowing his eyes at the guys his brother called his friends. Atsumu nodded and said his goodbyes before leaving, believing the next day you’d be by his side again.

You were the better part of every bit of beating heart that I had. Whatever I had.

When you said you weren’t crawling back you didn’t lie. He hoped that like the other times he was cruel that you would come back to him because you did it every time.

But when the next day you didn’t he didn’t think anything of it until two weeks later when he finally saw you in the hallways. You weren’t outwardly avoiding him anymore but you treated him as if you never knew him.

That hurt him more then he expected it too.

He was with his group of friends when you walked past him one day. He missed you more then anything so when your eyes connected he even tried to smile at you but you simply looked towards you friend standing next to you and continued your conversation with her.

“You okay?” Erin, one of the guys from the basketball team, had asked when he noticed Atsumu seemed out of it.

“Yeah fine.” He wasn’t though but it’s not like they noticed or cared. He looked around at the guys as they all continued to joke around. They were teasing girls that passed by them and usually he’d laugh along but today he cringed. Why was he friends with these guys again?

The girls were obviously uncomfortable as most of them walked away. He was going to leave when he heard them start to talk about you. One of them must’ve seen you walk by or maybe they were thinking about you for longer then he’d like.

“So that y/n, she’s up for grabs then?” One of them muttered to someone else. Obviously they didn’t want him to hear and they thought he wouldn’t either.

“I don’t know man ask him.” The other one motioned to Atsumu. “But the break down she had after he broke it off I wouldn’t advice it.”

“Maybe I could make her cry in bed.” He smirked at himself, he definitely thought he was some hot shit and Atsumu was over it. Before anyone could stop him Atsumu grabbed onto the guys shirt and shoved him against the wall.

“If you ever go near her or touch her I will bury you in the ground dick head.” His voice was low and threatening. The guy in front of him was shaking, he’d never seen Atsumu like this.

“Dude come on it was a joke.” Someone said, grabbing his shoulder. Atsumu shoved the guy against the wall one more time before he dropped him and shoved whoever had there hand on him.

“Fuck off.” He spat and stormed off. The entire hall was silent as they watched the scene in front of them but you weren’t one of them. You were sitting in class completely oblivious to what occurred in the hall.

I finally sat alone. Pitch black flesh and bone. Couldn’t believe that you were gone.

It was lunch time the same day but he didn’t feel like eating. You were in the classroom down the hall and he knew it. He wanted to get as far away as he could while still being in the school.

The group of friends he had didn’t sit with him that day but he couldnt care less he was sure they wouldn’t talk to him after what happened earlier.

So finally he went to the one place he knew he could think, the gym. No one was there so he grabbed the volleyballs from the closet and started serving them.

He missed you and it was slowly driving him crazy. It hasn’t even been that long since you confronted him and he couldn’t stop running the whole conversation in his head.

The more he thought about you and everything he did wrong the harsher the serves became. He was grunting as he smacked the volleyballs with as much force as he could that he was becoming sweaty. He went to grab another one when he found the basket empty.

He sighed in annoyance before running his hand through his hair. He paced back and forth not really knowing what he could do now but as he looked over to the basket he gritted his teeth.

He walked over to the basket and pushed it over. It slid across the ground with how much force he used to push it over.

He grabbed the closest ball before he chucked it at the closest wall. He felt like he wanted to scream but he knew he’d get in trouble with a teacher.

His grabbed another ball and held onto it tightly with one hand while the other balled up into a fist. He looked out at the gym before he walked closer to the net. He looked the net over before he sat down, his legs crossed and the volleyball still in his clutch.

He grabbed the ball with both hands before leaning his head down on it and finally letting all his frustration get to him. His eyes watered but he looked up at the ceiling, not wanting them to fall.

He ended up staying there the rest of the school day. Osamu was the first one to find him. He looked around at the mess his brother was and the mess he made and sighed before he walked over and helped Atsumu up and helped him clean up before the other players got there and found out he ditched.

“Y/n?” Osamu asked him while they stretched but Atsumu didn’t respond and continued to stretch his arms. Osamu and Atsumu were stretching off by themselves so they could talk about what Osamu walked in on. But Atsumu obviously didn’t want to talk so he dropped it.

Well you look like yourself but you’re somebody else only it ain’t on the surface. Well you talk like yourself, no I hear someone else though now you’re making me nervous.

It had been a few more weeks since what had happened and you still weren’t talking to Atsumu. You saw him around school but you made no move to make it up with him.

“Y/n?” You jumped out of fright when you heard someone right behind you. You turned to towards the person and sighed in relief when you saw Osamu. “I didn’t know you still came to watch us play?”

You didn’t. You didn’t even know why you were here but this was a huge deal for them and you wanted to be there to watch them play. “Oh this is the first game I’ve been to since uh, you know.

“Have you talked to him? He’s been pretty bad.” He told you and the timing couldn’t have been any worse because as soon as he asked you that you caught sight of Atsumu flirting with a few girls in the distance. You knew you didn’t have any right to be upset but it still hurt to see that he really didn’t change.

“No I haven’t but he seems to be doing just fine.” Osamu looked behind him towards where you were looking and he sighed. Of course Atsumu would do that right now. “Look I have to go but good luck out there okay?”

“Are you staying?” He called out to you as you went to walk away and you went silent for a moment as if thinking about if you should or not. “I would like you to stay.” He could see you thinking and he knew it would help his brother if you did.

You opened your mouth but closed it. You looked up at him before nodding softly with a small smile. You turned and walked away from him after that.

Osamu watched you go before you were lost in the crowd and then he turned towards his brother who was still oblivious to what just happened.

“You’re joking right?” Osamu asked him when he walked over to him. The two girls looked between the two twins and almost swooned at the sight of them. They would’ve if Osamu didn’t grab his brother and drag him away from the girls.

“What now? I was talking to those girls.” Osamu narrowed his eyes at his brothers stupidity. Atsumu crossed his arms, waiting for him to say something but he wasn’t expecting for the next sentence.

“Y/ns here you know.” Atsumus heart stopped and immediately he dropped his arms to his sides and started looking around. “She told me good luck. Don’t know if she stayed though.”

“Well did you tell her too? Did she just leave? Osamu I need to talk to her!” Atsumu was panicking he hadn’t talked to you in over four weeks and he needed to see you again.

“I told her I’d like her to stay. I don’t know if she will.” Osamu shrugged, watching his brother continue to look around. “But after what she just saw who knows.”

“She saw me talking to those girls?” Atsumu asked but he already knew, Osamu didn’t even have to answer him. “They didn’t mean anything!”

Atsumu motioned behind him to where he was talking to those girls, unaware of the fact that those girls were still there. They looked over in confusion and Osamu offered them a small wave before dragging his brother further away and out of sight of the girls.

“I know they didn’t. But if she’s here then win this game then go talk to her and make it right.” Osamu didn’t leave room to argue as he walked away to meet up with the team.

Well you look like yourself but you’re somebody else only it ain’t on the surface.

They lost the game. Inarizaki was quick to pack up and leave while the volleyball team trudged there way off the court. You watched them leave, all of them looking defeated.

Atsumus usual cockiness was long gone and it hurt you to see him so upset. But you didn’t stay to long to ponder on how you could help him.

They were getting there stuff put away when he caught a glimpse of you. He almost ran over to you right then but Osamu grabbed his arm. “Not now.”

“Then when?” Atsumu was frustrated and Osamu could see that. “I need to see her.”

“Talk to her when we finish up tonight. They’re staying to watch more games so you should too.” Osamu explained and Atsumu was going to argue but when he looked back to where you were, you were gone.

Atsumu sighed before following after his brother.

He was there to watch the games but he couldn’t really focus on them. He was devastated and without you there to comfort him and tell him he’d still go pro he felt even worse. So when his team finally decided to leave he made up his mind about what he would do next.

As soon as he and Osamu got home Atsumu said hello to there mother and left right after that. His mother was calling after him when Osamu told her where he was going and she left it alone.

He biked to your house, you didn’t live to far away. The sun was setting so he knew he needed to do this now and as soon as he stopped in front of your house his heart felt like it was beating out of his chest.

He walked up to your front door and knocked, anxiously waiting for someone to open the door. He could hear muffled voices inside before the door swung open and your face was the one in front of him.

His heart felt like it dropped. You were smiling before you saw him and soon it fell into a confused frown. “Atsumu what are you doing here?”

“Y/n I’m sorry.” He was breathless and even as he said that he was trying to regain his breaths.

You shifted slightly, looking him up and down. Had he come just to tell you that? “Okay” you said, crossing your arms.

Well you talk like yourself no, I hear someone else though now you’re making me nervous.

“Okay that’s it?” He asked you and immediately regretted if when you narrowed your eyes at him so he changed the subject. “you were at the game?”

You nodded your head a little, “I was.”

“And you saw us lose?”

“I did.” There was a hint of sympathy in your tone but he could see through your eyes that you did feel bad for them. Even if you couldn’t read him anymore he could still read you. “Atsumu. Why are you here?” You asked again.

He looked down at the ground, trying to find his words before he looked up at you. “I wanted to say I’m sorry. For everything I did and the way I treated you weeks ago.”

“Weeks ago? Is that all you think you did wrong?” The sympathy was gone and was being replaced by anger now. “You’ve been treating me like shit since the end of last year.”

“It wasn’t bad.” He tried, his anger was getting the best of him too.

“Wasn’t bad?” You scoffed “Atsumu! You played with my feelings! You treated me like I was an easy girl that you could pass around. Like I was a girl that would give you anything you wanted.”

He was silent.

“Atsumu, I was the only one who stood by you through everything. People told me you were an asshole when we were younger but it wasn’t until this year that I started thinking they were right. Growing up I saw a part of you that only when you’re older you will see too.” Your voice got softer and softer as you finally got your frustration out after weeks of not talking.

“So what happens now?” He asked, your eyes saddening when you saw his gloss over. “Is this really it?”

“For now.” His jaw clenched as you closed your door and he was left standing there, willing the tears away. He took another moment before he walked back to his bike and it wasn’t until he got there that the tears finally fell.

He lost you and he didn’t know if he could get you back.

~~

#haikyuu #haikyu #haikyuu!! #haikyu!! #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagine #atsumu miya #miya atsumu #miya twins #osamu miya #atsumu x reader #atsumu miya x reader #atsumu imagine #atsumu miya imagine

[yourdeepestfathoms]

chasing pegasus (part two)

part one

[horse racing au]

tw: there’s some discussions of unhealthy dieting in this one, so watch out!

------------------------------------------------------

a lap around the yard

The Trainer

Four days later, the sound of hoofsteps came crunching up the driveway of the Netherworld. It was a wet, early morning, the sun not even up yet. Animals were still asleep, as were Barbara and Adam- not even Lydia had showed up for work.

And yet, there were hoofsteps coming from the street.

It had taken little persuasion to convince Presley Lind’s parents into allowing Beetlejuice to be her new trainer once they found out he was associated with the Maitland’s. Their bored expressions lit up instantly, and Beetlejuice easily saw the greed shining inside of their eyes. He had managed to bite back a laugh in the moment, not wanting to ruin this opportunity.

As a child, horses were Beetlejuice’s entire world. Despite his mother working in politics, he lived on a farm, where the plains rolled out to him every morning like green carpets and the air was fresh and clean. There was so much space, and absolutely nothing to fill it.

Lawrence “Beetlejuice” Shoggoth longed for a pony of his own more than anything. Almost every day, he would watch the neighbors ride around on their horses, practically radiating smugness like, “Hahaha! Look at us! We got horses and you don’t! Hahaha!”

He tried to get a horse. Every single Christmas, every single birthday, he would ask his mother for a pony of his own. And every single time he was shot down. She would say that his wonder towards the animals was just a “phase,” that he would lose interest in the beast and leave her to take care of it, but Beetlejuice knew the real reason she said no was because she didn’t like when he got anything he wanted.

It wasn’t until he was seventeen that he finally got the horse he had been dreaming about.

She was a little black-and-white thoroughbred filly that Beetlejuice nursed himself after her mother was killed by a pack of hungry coyotes. His mother had been furious when he carried the foal into the house that dark evening, but he managed to convince her into letting him keep the animal, as long as he paid for everything and didn’t come running to her when he needed help. He was ecstatic.

That little black-and-white thoroughbred filly was the same large black-and-white thoroughbred mare standing beside him at five-thirty in the morning before the sun had even risen, waiting for their pupils.

Sandy, aka It’s Showtime, was the highlight of Beetlejuice’s life. She was fast, full of energy, and had more of a personality than most people Beetlejuice had met. She was everything he dreamed about and more. He didn’t know what he would do without her.  

 “Good morning, student!” Beetlejuice greeted Presley animatedly when she finally finished her walk down the driveway. Strangely enough, she wasn’t riding her horse, instead guiding him by a halter. She didn’t seem to have been on his back at all that morning, deciding to make the whole trip on foot.

 “Good morning, Mr. Shoggoth,” Presley greeted back. In the faint glow from the light attached to the wall of the nearby barn, he saw that she was dressed in a soft-looking flannel, a tank top underneath that, leggings, and boots. Her helmet and goggles were hanging from the side of her saddle. She had her crop with her and she kept fidgeting with it as some sort of nervous tic.

Beetlejuice couldn’t help but laugh at her insistence in formality. She truly was the epitome of a Southern Belle, even up in Connecticut.

 “You can call me Beetlejuice, kiddo, it’s okay.”

Presley wrinkled her nose, but nodded anyway. Beetlejuice was sure that was going to last for maybe an hour, and then she would be back to referring to him like he was the president of the United States or something.

 “So, are you ready for our first day of training?” Beetlejuice asked, hoping he didn’t sound too much like an excited child on Christmas. He had been waiting for the perfect protégé for what felt like forever and he finally found someone who showed real promise. He couldn’t wait to teach her about everything he knew.

 “Yes, sir!” Presley answered. She matched his energy, so Beetlejuice decided to ignore the fact that she replied to him like he was a drill sergeant and she was a wannabe soldier preparing for war.

 “That’s what I like to hear!” Beetlejuice clapped her on the back. “Let’s get out to the track.”

--- --- ---

The first hour and a half, they didn’t even touch the horses.

Sandy and Presley’s stallion, a scraggly grey thoroughbred stallion named Peril, were put into the carousel to get their muscles warmed up for later riding--

--except Peril attempted to physically fight the equipment the moment it turned on and tried to guide him around the circle, which he did not like at all. Beetlejuice and Presley both had to rush to calm him down before he could break something or hurt himself or worse: wake up Barbara. After a few moments of resistance, he finally gave into the tug of the machine and relented to following its pull.

By the time the sun had finally come up, Presley was soaked in a fine layer of sweat. They spent those first few hours exercising; or, rather, Presley was exercising. Beetlejuice watched over her with a hose at the ready if he caught her slacking off.

Being a jockey was a lot harder than anyone initially thought. Despite being small in stature, easily half the size of any NFL player most of the time, they were required to guide twelve hundred pounds of pure flesh and muscle at speeds of up to forty miles per hour. Strength was needed to stay on the backs of the sprinting beasts, hence why the training regimen for jockeys were so intense.

After the initial stretches, Beetlejuice had Presley do a myriad of exercises- squats, lunges, jumping lunges, flutter kicks, bear crawls, burpees, and one-leg deadlifts, and even after finishing all of that she still wasn’t done. He told her to run a mile around the track, and she went without complaining.

 “Lawrence, you better not be killing our jockey. We just got her.”

A voice like a songbird’s sweet chirping broke through the silence of the morning. Beetlejuice turned to see Barbara and Adam walking over, both of them smiling. He perked up.

By then, the sun had come up, bathing the Netherworld in soft golden rays. Horses emerged from the stables, moseying out into the pasture to graze, though some of them stopped to peer curiously at Peril. He and Sandy were mulling in a nearby holding pen after they finished their own exercise on the carousel. When Peril caught the stares he was getting from the other horses, he lifted his head, grass hanging from his mouth, and flicked his ears at them in some kind of silent, equine gesture, then went back to eating.

 “I’m not!” Beetlejuice said, laughing. “She’s fine. Doing great, actually!”

With impeccable comedic timing, Presley skidded to a halt at the fencing in front of them, kicking up a plume of dirt, which only furthered to dirty her even more than she already was: head-to-toe, she was completely covered in silt from the track, turning her pale skin a faint orangey color. It effectively stuck to the sweat already coating her body, making her look like she had tried to test the dust baths the horses sometimes took.

She raised her head, face red from exertion and orange-brown from dirt, and squinted through the morning sun at Barbara and Adam.

 “Good morning, Mrs. Maitland. Good morning, Mr. Maitland,” She greeted the couple with her trademarked politeness, even as she was doubled over and heaving her breaths.

 “Morning, Presley,” Adam said.

 “Good morning, dear. How are you?” Barbara asked.

 “Good,” Presley answered. “You?”

 “I’m doing very well.”

Presley nodded. She shook herself out, though it did little to remove the dirt clinging to her frame, then stood up straight, hands pressed against her lower back like she was trying to pop her spine.

 “BJ isn’t working you too hard, is he?” Adam asked, looking at her, then squinting at Beetlejuice in playful suspiciousness.

 “No, sir,” Presley answered. “I’m okay.” She dragged her feet through the dirt, brewing up another storm around her, as she walked over to the fence and braced herself against the wood.

 “Rude,” Beetlejuice poked Adam in the ribs. “You’re acting like I’m gonna torture her or something! I’m a great teacher! Right, kid?”

 “I got sand in my boots,” Presley said distractedly, kicking the heel of one of her musty boots against a small rock.

 “See!” Beetlejuice said, and Adam and Barbara laughed.

 “Before you continue your teachings, I want you both to eat breakfast,” Barbara said, for all the world sounding like a mother to a soccer team. She looked at Presley. “Do you like danishes?”

��“Oh, uhh,” Presley shuffled her feet awkwardly, then scrunched her face up like a disturbed bunny when the sand must have scratched around in her boots. “I don’t eat breakfast.”

Barbara and Adam stared at her. She blinked back at them, then glanced up at Beetlejuice with a worried expression that said, “Did I do something wrong?”

 “Ever?” Adam asked.

 “No,” Presley shook her head. “Sometimes I’ll have a shake. Maybe an apple. That’s usually it, though.”

 “Honey, you have to eat,” Barbara said, sounding concerned.

 “I’m on a diet,” Presley said back, as if that justified her skipping meals all the time. “It’s kinda strict, so…” She kicked at a pebble, avoiding their gazes.

 “Diet for what?” Adam probed. “You’re already so thin!”

 “We have to be thin,” Presley reprimanded. “Jockeys, I mean. There’s a weight restriction for a reason. And if I slack off one day, then I’ll snowball, and you know how easy it is to regain weight?”

 “How much do you weigh right now?” Beetlejuice joined in on the questioning. He hoped nobody could hear the curl of concerned sickness edging his voice.

 “Uhhh,” Presley had the audacity to count on her fingers, which made Adam’s eyes practically bulge out of his skull, as if he were expecting her to say some absurd number like seven or ten. Though, in his defense, what she actually ended up saying was equally as concerning.

 “If I remember correctly from the last time I checked… I think ninety-nine pounds?”

 “Ninety--” Adam sputtered, cutting himself off. “NINETY-NINE?!”

Presley scrunched her face up at him again. “Yeah…” She said slowly. “Usually I’m ninety-four, though.”

 “NINETY-FOUR?!”

Presley blinked at him. She seemed innocently oblivious to how worrying what she said was…or maybe she did know how worrying it was and was just acting like she didn’t in a way to convince herself that what she was doing was okay and perfectly healthy.

She didn’t look emaciated. To be honest, Beetlejuice used to think that anyone under a hundred pounds were like those people in the sad pictures of Africa, the ones that stated that everyone on the continent were starving to death and tried to convince you to do some twenty-four hour fasting thing to “see how they lived” or something like that instead of doing something useful like asking for donations to help those people. You know- drum-tight skin, ribs showing, stomachs sunken into empty caverns, every detail of the hip bone being perfectly highlighted, limbs like matchsticks, more skeleton than human.

But Presley looked like the exact opposite of that. Her skin wasn’t pulled tight over her bones, her bones weren’t showing at all, even, and she definitely was not a skeleton.

But Beetlejuice also knew firsthand that the effects of “jockey dieting” weren’t always physical. Sometimes it all on the inside- throat eroded from constant purging, muscles weak with no energy, stomach cannibalizing itself in a desperate attempt to get nutrients.

He knew because he, too, had slaved himself over the jockey diet before eventually accepting that he would never meet the weight restriction and get to race in a real derby.

Seeing his new pupil torture herself with such a hellish thing did not make him happy.

 “Presley, you have to eat,” Barbara said gently before Beetlejuice could blow his top and scold his new student.

 “I do,” Presley tried to assure her. “I eat dinner. One meal per day; that’s what the regimen says. I have to follow it if I want to be a jockey. Those are, like, the rules.”

 “Well, I don’t see any rule book around here,” Adam said.

 “It’s an unspoken one.”

 “Presley, Barbara is right,” Beetlejuice spoke up. “You have to eat. I get the whole ‘staying in shape to stay in the weight requirement’ thing, I do, but you’ll be no use in a race if you’re too weak to ride.”

Presley seemed to be getting flustered. She opened her mouth, then closed it and ducked her head. Her boot scuffed at the grass.

 “Danishes sound nice. Thank you, Mrs. Maitland.”

--- --- ---

After a breakfast of danishes, scrambled eggs, grilled ham, and orange juice, Beetlejuice and his student were back outside. Now that it was light out, he decided to let her muscles rest a little longer and give her a tour. Lydia, who had been dropped off by her father, joined them.

Most of the horses were out in the pasture, as were the other farm animals the Maitland’s kept, but most of the broodmares spent their time inside the stables, a breezy building that smelled like hay and dirt. The pregnant horses rumbled and huffed to each other, and Beetlejuice recognized the low-level threat in those sounds. Foaling mares were often aggressive. They were kept separately from each other, in large stalls with heavy wooden walls and thick layers of rushes on the floor.

Six mothers filled the stables. Barbara and Adam were encouraging more breeding to replace the three mares they had recently lost, and to fill the orders they had gotten from richer racers that were seeking out a good horse. Lydia pointed out all the foaling horses as they went by, and Presley listened with great interest.

The first was Bullseye aka Target’s Grand Splash, a solid black Arabian with a single white spot around her left eye and pure white socks. She was fierce and standoffish.

The next was Sky aka Up, Up, and Away, a pure white standardbred with hints of pink around her dark eyes. She was the restless type, constantly resetting her bedding because it wasn’t good enough for her liking.

Then there was Flicker aka Light The Night, a buckskin paint horse with white splotches all across her body and a constant need for playing. As they passed by, she was throwing her hay up into the air with her teeth.

After her was Pisces aka The Zodiac Killer, a dark chestnut thoroughbred with even darker socks around her hooves. Her ears were pinned back and she glared as they walked by her pen.

Fifth was Magi aka Blaze of Enchantment, a blonde quarter horse with a silky brown mane and tail. Her gentle nature made her easy to care for.

Finally, there was Sneeze-Breeze aka It’s A Long Story, a second thoroughbred, this one with a coat of red roan. Upon hearing her name, Presley gave Lydia a confused look, to which Lydia replied with, “It’s a long story.”

Presley laughed.

 “And then that’s my horse!” Lydia said, pointing to a black abyss that was a Tennessee walker gelding. Its dark coat really fit Lydia’s aesthetic. “Well, he’s my favorite horse, but I still like to call him my horse. His name is Gloom!”

Gloom lifted his head from his stall and blinked big blue eyes at Lydia. She patted his large cheek.

 “His show name is The Moon Man,” Lydia further informed.

 “He’s so handsome,” Presley said in awe, staring up at the void.

Beetlejuice allowed the two teenagers to chat a little longer before pulling Presley back out to begin training. It was good that Lydia talked to girls her age. She usually just made conversation with the horses ever since the recent passing of her mother. Maybe a human friend would be good for her.

 “Alright, kiddo,” Beetlejuice said once they were all back outside. Presley had Peril by his halter for an inspection. “Let’s see what you got.”

Beetlejuice, for one, knew a pretty horse when he saw one, and Peril was the epitome of thoroughbred beauty. His coat was a glossy steel grey, rippling rays of light when the sun hit the fur, and his mane and tail were the color of storm clouds. He had four black stockings up each of his legs as if he had crawled out from the shadows. There was a freckling of grey on his snout and his eyes were a bright flame blue. Beetlejuice could see why Presley liked him so much.

Unfortunately, outward looks were just about the only thing Peril had going for him.

Although he was huge, easily twice, maybe three times the size of his tiny jockey, he was gangly and awkward. His legs were stalky, knees knobby, and his tail was bushy. His ears were moving constantly, like spirits were whispering in them, telling him secrets, and his eyes were always looking around.

Peril twitched when Beetlejuice laid hands on him. He lifted one of his back legs, scraping the dirt with the edge of his hoof, but seemed to decide against kicking for the moment, though he still leered at Beetlejuice out from the corner of his eyes, silently warning him.

Beetlejuice went on.

Peril quickly proved to be the exact opposite of the phrase “gentle giant.” He was a stubborn thing, bearing enough tenaciousness to fill all of Connecticut. Even Adam’s mule wasn’t as hard headed as this beast.

The stallion refused to lift his hooves for Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice had to wrestle with his leg just to be able to check his feet, though he decided to let the attitude slide because it made Lydia and Presley giggle.

Peril had thoroughbred-typical shitty feet. Thin soles. Too flat. Underrun heels. Typical racer. Best to get the farrier down to the farm to start drawing the toe back into something that would at least be considered a little healthy.

He dropped the foot. The joints flexed cleanly. Peril had muscle, Beetlejuice could see, but it was hidden beneath his bulk and awkward girth. At least his ribs weren’t showing.

Beetlejuice stole a glance at Presley, who was holding Peril steady by his halter and chatting avidly with Lydia. Her horse ate better than she did.

Dropping the subject from his mind for now, Beetlejuice began to check Peril’s withers and back. Peril humored his touch, keeping his hindquarters cocked for the moment, not ready to kick just yet. Beetlejuice eyed them wryly. As lanky as his legs were, he could knock someone’s brains out with those hooves.

Beetlejuice ran his hands over Peril’s soft hide. Peril shifted beneath his palms, letting out an impatient huff. He looked at Presley, who looked back with a nervous expression.

 “How often do you train with him?” Beetlejuice asked.

 “Six days a week,” Presley answered, and Beetlejuice caught the anxious tremors in her voice. “Sundays are our off days.”

Beetlejuice nodded. “It’s good that you both have time to relax.” He stroked Peril’s broad neck, and the muscles bunched and released beneath his fingers. “What is his diet like?”

 “I give him two to three meals a day of grain and hay,” Presley told him. She was whiteknuckling the halter leash nervously, as if she fed Peril baby heads or something and didn’t want to reveal her bloody secret. “He gets carrot and apple slices in the evenings. Sometimes other fruits and vegetables I have at home. And if he’s good I give him peppermints.”

At the sound of the treat, Peril’s ears flicked to alertness and he began to lip at Presley’s hand. Presley laughed and fished out a mint she had in her pocket. Peril devoured it instantly.

Beetlejuice began to rattle off several questions, and Presley answered them with little hesitation, though her anxiety remained.

 “Does he receive yearly vaccinations?”

 “Yes, sir.”

 “When was he last seen by a vet?”

 “Two months ago, I believe.”

 “Who grooms him?”

 “I do.”

 “Has he ever had colic?”

 “No, sir.”

 “What kind of bit do you use?”

 “Usually a D-ring snaffle, but sometimes I use an eggbutt snaffle. They’re both easiest on his mouth and he gets cranky if it isn’t comfortable.”

 “Where did you get him?”

 “My neighbor gave him to me.”

 “For how much?”

 “For free.”

Beetlejuice raised an eyebrow at Presley. “Really?”

 “Yes, sir,” Presley said, and Beetlejuice was sure he had been called ‘sir’ more times in one day than he had in his entire life. “He really didn’t want him anymore and just gave him to me.”

 “Huh,” Beetlejuice looked up at Peril. “Well, let’s see how he rides, shall we?”

The four of them walked to the hooded paddock. Presley looked supremely uneasy. She wouldn’t stop fidgeting for some reason.

 “Be safe,” Presley whispered.

Beetlejuice couldn’t help but give her a weird look as he climbed onto Peril’s back.

Oh, Beetlejuice thought as he was being bucked off mere moments after sitting down. THAT’S why he was given away for free.

--- --- ---

 “He’s certainly an…opinionated horse.”

Several hours later, Beetlejuice and Presley were sitting on white picket fence together: Beetlejuice nursing a half-empty bottle of bitter apple cider, Presley sipping lukewarm water. In the enclosed field they were balanced before, Peril trotted the length of his pasture, tail flagged, head snaking in front of him.

 “He’s not bad.”

 “Never said he was, kid.”

Presley ducked her head. She looked guilty. Beetlejuice hadn’t realized someone could say sorry so much in one breath, and yet Presley had. Even though he only had a minor bruise on his side from being bucked off, she still wasn’t over what happened.

 “Doesn’t like doors very much,” Beetlejuice observed.

Presley winced. He was referring to when Peril had viciously fought the door to a small pen she had tried to put him into earlier that afternoon.

 “He’s not-- I mean, he doesn’t usually--” Presley was fumbling. She was pale, hands clenched in her flannel. She looked like she was about to spiral into a full blown anxiety attack.

Beetlejuice put a hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay,” He said. “Horses have their quirks. Sandy used to snort sand all the time.”

Presley blinked big doe eyes at him. “Really?”

 “You didn’t think she was named because of her colors, did you?” Beetlejuice tipped his head at her, looking amused.

 “There’s black sand! That exists!” Presley tried to argue in an attempt to save face.

Beetlejuice laughed. “When she was a filly, she used to stick her nose in EVERYTHING. Always these big mounds of dirt, and then she would sneeze, knock herself backwards, and look at me indignantly, to which I would say, ‘Then stop sticking sand up your nose!’ She never listened.”

Presley giggled.

They both watched Peril for a minute. His head was still in the air, neck arched, ears pointed at some unknown distant object he deemed worthy of his attention. Then, he caught them staring and took off in a dead sprint around the corner of the yard, ripping up chunks of turf with his hooves. He stopped abruptly, glanced to make sure they were still looking at him, and then trotted away regally.

 “I like this horse,” Beetlejuice said, breaking the silence. “I want him to win.”

 “Everyone wants their horse to win, Mr. Shoggoth,” Presley mumbled, shoulders slumped like they were being weighed down by some unruly sin.

Guilt, Beetlejuice rationalized.

He gave Presley a look.

 “Beetlejuice,” She corrected herself. “Mr. Beetlejuice.”

 “That’s Mr. Juice to you,” Beetlejuice said, poking her in the side, and she nearly squirmed right off of the fencepost. She giggled again. It didn’t last long.

 “I want him to win, too,” Presley whispered.

As awkward and ill-tempered as Peril was, he could.

Beetlejuice had met a lot of horses. He had run his eyes and his hands over champions. Hundreds from afar, and dozens up close. A.P. Indy, The Strawman, Stay Thirsty. Even Ocean Liner, though he’d been long retired by that time. There had been Sweet Devil, getting roses draped around his mud-spattered neck; Slipstream, bounding around the winners circle; Permafrost, head held up in haughty pride as he passed by other horses.

Beside The Dying Fire could outrun them all.

 “I just don’t know if I’m enough for him.”

The comment caught Beetlejuice off guard. He looked down at Presley, and he could see it now: the self-doubt, the worry, the fear, the painful anxiety raking up and down her insides like jagged horse hooves.

Presley “Jeopardy” Lind wasn’t just timid, she was fragile, too. Much too fragile for the awful things spiraling in her head.

Beetlejuice set a hand on her shoulder. “We chose you for a reason. You rode that beast and got third. You have skill, Presley. You’re exactly what he needs.”

Presley’s eyes were sparkling up at him. Beetlejuice smiled.

 “You’re our jockey.”

Presley looked out at Peril. He looked back at her. A thousand plus pounds of muscle, and even heavier than that, the weight of all the dreams each one of these beasts carried. A dark, sharp look in his eye that was either intelligence or haughty pride, or maybe just the hope of his human creators reflecting back at them.

She looked up at Beetlejuice again and, buried beneath the fear and anxiety and doubt, there was confidence.

 “I’m your jockey.”

#horse racing au #beetlejuice the musical #beetlejuice the broadway musical #beetlejuice au #beetlejuice fanfiction #beetlejuice fic #beetlejuice fanfic #beetlejuice #lawrence beetlejuice shoggoth #barbara maitland #adam maitland #lydia deetz #the jockey #beetlelands #tw: eating problems

[writerfangirlbooks]

Bobby’s Daughter Part 1

Dean x Y/N

Prompt: Imagine flirting with Dean Winchester before he finds out you're Bobby's daughter.

A/N: I know Bobby never had children, but let's imagine for now. I've got a cool idea, for the most part, to go with this prompt. As always, feel free to request any ideas you would like me to write! I've had quite a few Dean ones recently and even more coming up soon. Thanks for sticking with me. Also, I just can't write a story without a backstory, I just need it desperately haha, so enjoy this midnight mess. And uhh, this one gets a little steamier than the others, just a heads up. Also this one is getting multiple parts! Word Count: 1800

Credit to gif owner!

It took you long enough to convince your dad to so much as let you hunt by yourself.

You heard the story of your mom once, and only once. Your dad hated discussing what happened to her. It broke his heart, losing the love of his life. Bobby often declared he didn't know what he would do without you, that you being born was a blessing and miracle tied into one burst of joy in this miserable man's life. That was quite a bit to live up to. Fortunately, you weren't stuck with him all of the time. Once he stopped homeschooling you, you were able to have real interactions and get to know the real world.

Every once and a while, a friend of your father would drop his sons off at the doorsteps to watch for endless amounts of time. Sure, the boys were a couple of years younger, but at least they never said you had cooties. They were excited to be with Uncle Bobby, though they weren't related. It occasionally made you doubt your place in his heart, wondering if he wished you had been born a son instead. However, it was nice to not be made fun of not having a mom and having a drunkard for a father. You saw the brothers young and at one point, hadn't seen them since. It wasn't uncommon for traveling hunters to occasionally leave their children for a weekend or two, so you didn't easily remember all of their names.

Growing up a female was tricky in small-town Iowa, even more so as a hunter. Your father spent some time away hunting when things began to go awry in nearby towns. You started public middle school around age eleven, but your father feared you were simply too young to spend nights by yourself, and you didn't exactly have a bunch of friends to spend the nights at. That ended up causing extra frustration and stress on his plate before you suggested an idea you watched on television: private school.

In a way, Bobby was a better father after you went away. You became more outgoing, learned what it meant to be a lady, and more importantly, how to use that to your advantage. You were encouraged to learn other languages, try extracurriculars. So you did, studying Spanish and French for the rest of your education. You joined the photography club, acted in theatre, and played soccer. You went home on holiday breaks, summer being your favorite as it meant spending more time with your dad. He did his best to be home as often as possible. You got excited to fix cars if it meant spending time with him. Despite his protests, you felt encouraged to hunt, so he gave you pointers. It was years before around age sixteen, he finally allowed your first solo hunt. It was thrilling and unsurprisingly, it went great. He preferred playing board games and watching television with you, making him overall pretty chill.

The one thing he was not a cool dad came to your dating life. You tried getting a boyfriend young and Bobby insisted on meeting him before your first dance. Let's just say the two of you didn't leave together by the end of the night. He was more lenient toward regular, mediocre guys. His one rule was the most adamant: don't date hunters. Fortunately enough for you, most hunters were around your dad's age, so, very much not your type.

That could lead to some very lonely tonights as you became an adult, leading to one night stands in apartments. Of course, you skipped past the whole college scene. Far too expensive and not something you seemed interested in, anyway. Despite your father's protests, you decided to spend time traveling rather than staying with him. You had gotten used to your independence and was somehow nearing thirty way too quickly. You considered yourself content in life. You were a darn good hunter, a woman that could hold her alcohol, and a successful freelance photographer. You weren't sure where your dad's income came from and you decided it best not to ask, sticking to making an honest living while hunting as often as possible.

It was late summer and Bobby's birthday was coming up soon. Although he hated celebrating, you made sure to be around during this time. It just so happened to coincide with a case you were tracking. You figured you would surprise him tomorrow evening and make his favorite dinner. For now, though, you rented a small apartment half an hour away. You felt motels were dirty and a bit pathetic. You did have some class, after all.

Tonight you were looking for a good time, clothed in one of your favorite dresses, with matching heels and handbag. You headed to the bar, pulled up a chair, and ordered your favorite margarita. Soon enough, a man's build and shadow blocked your view of the door. He cleared his throat and you turned your head, taking in the view of messy brown hair and mischievous green eyes attached to a face full of sun-kissed freckles. The man wore nothing special, just regular jeans and a plaid shirt layered with a hunter-green jacket. It was a look that fits well in Iowa, but his voice showed quickly he was not raised here.

"Not a beer girl, huh?" He asked, raising an eyebrow towards your bright colored drink. You did a quick assessment and deemed this man as not a threat. He could be just what you were looking for. As you began to speak, you watched his attentive gaze dip from your eyes to your lips then back again.

"Not quite my style. I like something a little sweeter," you said with a small smile. Leaning back in your chair, you aimlessly twirled the straw around in your drink as you looked back up to the handsome stranger.

He draped an arm around your chair, his fingers lightly brushing your shoulders in the process. "Then feel free to call me sugar, sweetheart," he said. His eyes crinkled with the flirty grin. You wanted to laugh at what a bad line it was but figured his looks could make up for a lacking game. You bit back your smile by licking your lips and tacking a long sip of your drink.

"Well, I don't know about that, but you can call me Y/N," you offered.

The conversation quickly led into basic first date questions, leading you and the man who later introduced himself as Dean to realize you had quite a few similarities, such as bands, landmarks, and even pies. Neither of you was able to persuade the other to change interest in alcohol. Once you got to the topic of cars, you had lost track of time. Dean claimed to have an older Impala and was eager to show you. You were used to the ploys of cool cars to get a woman outside, but you weren't objecting to where the night was headed. You were left intrigued and somewhat shocked that someone this good looking was actually telling the truth about having such a well kept and beautiful vehicle. You were hoping to get the chance to impress him with your own knowledge about cars at some point if things actually made it past three am leavings, which was typically not likely.

When Dean proposed the invitation, he noticed your response was less than immediate. You didn't mean to hesitate but was trying to work out to tell him how you did not feel comfortable leaving your own car in the bar parking lot. His shoulders sagged ever so slightly. It typically wouldn't have been that noticeable except behavior change was something you studied in school when taught how to create poses for your photos. His green eyes were bright and eager, reflecting from the yellow lights outside of the bar.

"I, uh, if you're not interested... we don't have to..." Dean began stuttering, changing pace. He must not be used to rejection, you decided. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable."

You took one of Dean's hands, finding the new change endearing. Although it could've been funny to turn down someone that seemed like a player and innate flirter, that was not your plan for tonight. "Dean, I'm fine. I just don't like to leave my car, so if you want to follow, or go with me, back to my place?" You offered. You tilted your head, waiting for an answer.

He nodded. His grin had returned widely and he used his other hand to indicate for me to lead the way. And off Dean and you went. The two of you stumbled into your apartment in half the time it should have taken you to get back. Dean's chatter filled your ears up until you unlocked the door to your room.

Your keys were tossed onto the television stand while shoes were being kicked off against the closet door. Heat filled the room as your bodies filled the bed, disregarding your clothes and newness to one another. You felt much more connected as Dean kissed you, a sense of familiarity in his warmth and scent. It began with an intense and heavy makeout before his lips left yours, and began to trail down your neck, continuing further as time ticked away. The clock on the wall was the only sound you could hear besides your ragged breathing and the squeaks of the bed. The sheets were too weak for your grip, so you moved your nails into his back. You could feel his smiles trace your skin. You couldn't help but shudder when Dean whispered into your ear. It was a beautifully messy sight, watching Dean and you move as one, clinging to one another. Your eyelids fluttered, unsure of where to focus as the sensations grew stronger. Arching your head back to allow more room elsewhere, you thought you had lost your voice before one simple movement reminded you how to speak, urging you to call out Dean's name.

The night carried on for much longer.

Wattpad/Pinterest: writerfangirlbooks

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Tags: @akshi8278​ 

#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fandom #spn imagine #SPN #spn fic #spn fanfiction #spnfandom #dean winchester #dean #flirting with disaster #flirting with dean #the winchesters #winchesters #winchester boys #bobby singer #dean x y/n #dean x reader

[haikyuu-philia]

Can we have a Tsukki scenario where the reader is just as sarcastic as him? I mostly see the reader being overly sensitive and stuff. Also, I'm new here and look forward to reading your works

This ended up being longer than it was supposed to, but now it’s too late anyways XD

As in introverted and overly polite person, I had my struggles writing two sarcastic people at the same time. Yet, here we are, with this piece filled with not-so classical romance!

Also a very late welcome to the blog - I’m happy to have you here :3

Another Love Language | A Tsukishima x fem! Reader Scenario

Words: 1336

-----

People were gathered all over the place. Even though this hall had been reserved for participating teams only, there was nearly no empty spot to be found. Boys and girls wearing jerseys in all colours of the rainbow had taken over, creating a noise by simply talking to each other that could be compared to an earthquake. 

As most of his own teammates had been awake way too early this morning, Tsukishima was now able to call himself one of the few lucky ones with an actual corner to sit at. He taped his fingers in advance while Yamaguchi tried not to stare at the crowd, which would sent his heart rate up to unknown heights.

Nishinoya and Tanaka had left several minutes ago to meet some friend from a girls’ team. With every announcement Asahi seemed more pale, Kageyama fiddled with his fingers to properly stretch them. The trio of Daichi, Sugawara and Ennoshita was casually chatting with each other. And Hinata was absolutely nowhere to be seen, probably causing a ruckus at the toilettes as usual. 

What a time to be a member of Karasuno.

A glance at his phone told Tsukishima that the first match would start in an hour. So the warm-up would be due in about thirty minutes. Actually he had been checking his messages, but nothing new popped up in his inbox. 

Positively speaking this meant that Akiteru had found his way to Tokyo without any issues and was most likely sitting at his assigned seat by now. Tsukishima rested his back against the wall as he starred at his feet. 

The room might be crowded and loud, but he still managed to understand many parts of different conversations. Some people were standing pretty close to the area of his team anyways, closer than he appreciated. He rolled his eyes at their behaviour. 

„Aren’t these boys from Karasuno? The team that was known as the fallen crows?“ He heard a boy whisper from a few meters away.

Not only had this guy attracted Tsukishima’s attention, seemingly the rest of his teammates was listening as well. No one made eye contact as the stranger continued to speak without noticing that the victims of his theories were already planning their comeback. 

„Do you really think that they are strong enough to beat someone here?“

In absolute sync all member of Karasuno present were looking up to stare at the culprit with a blank expression on their faces. Once he had understood that their eyes were directed towards him, he froze immediately. He broke out of his paralysis by jumping when another person approached him from behind.

„Yeah, because I would totally think of the team that kicked Shiratorizawa, the current champion, out off the competition as weak," a female voice commented on his question from earlier. 

Yamaguchi and Tsukishima changed their mimics by the time the sarcastic remarks had reached their ears. The latter couldn’t decide whether to sigh or to hold his breath, though a smirk appeared on his face nevertheless. Of course he would recognise the voice of his own girlfriend from miles away or in the middle of a thousand people. 

Supporting his upper body with his hand he rose from his place, becoming the target of his team members’ curiosity.

In the meantime the boy, who had been called out by you, had retreated into the ocean of unknown faces. Obviously yours stood out even more to him. On the contrary spotting a tall blond guy in a black-orange jersey hadn’t been the hardest task for you to fulfil either.

When Tsukishima and you walked towards each other, the eyes of the other Karasuno players were practically pinned to your boyfriend’s back. Only Yamaguchi happened to know what exactly they were witnessing. For the rest it looked like the first-year approached a random girl who had just roasted someone for them.

„I thought I told you that you didn’t have to come,“ he said with one of his eyebrows raised. „What are you doing here?“

„Playing soccer, of course,“ you shot back with a grin wrinkling your cheeks.

So far you had only seen him in his volleyball attire on pictures, not in reality. On the ride to the stadium his older brother Akiteru had shown you plenty of them and had been blabbering endlessly about Kei’s career as a middle blocker. 

But nothing could have prepared you for the moment when you actually got to see him in his jersey. Number 11 of Karasuno, a regular. 

„Hellooooooo Tsukishima! Would you mind to introduce us to this lovely girl you are talking to?“

Suddenly Sugawara had popped up next to the two of you, starling your boyfriend for the minority of a second. Not much to Tsukishima’s surprise Daichi stood right behind the setter, eyeing you with an innocent smile. 

„Ah, you must be Kei's teammates. Nice to meet you! I won’t occupy him for long, just making sure that he is in usually high spirits.“ You proceeded with telling them your name, school and grade. 

After that you looked at your boyfriend to finish your introduction as you certainly didn’t know how much his team was involved in his love life. 

„She is my stalker in disguise of a fan," he responded to your nonverbal plea.

A chuckle left your mouth while you crossed your arms in front of your chest and leaned onto your lamppost of a significant other. Even with your body putting weight on him, he didn’t move in inch. So you stood securely.

„Nah, I am more of his personal reminder that his heart of stone is able to feel love.“

Sugawara and Daichi introduced themselves, exchanging glances with one another in between sending approving looks your way. Together with you Tsukishima returned to his former resting spot where Yamaguchi greeted you as well. Out of the Karasuno bunch he had been the only person to officially have been told about the change of his best friend’s relationship status.

Though, Sugawara had to admit that he had indeed had a suspicions until today. 

Sitting next to each other with your backs facing the wall, you more or less leaning onto him again, the missing boys of the team returned one by one.

At first Nishinoya and Tanaka did not believe their eyes that a third girl had found their way to them before Tsukishima clicked his tongue at them. They went on with jumping up and down, probably attracting Hinata in the end. 

Not less excited, the orange-haired boy had sparkles in his eyes as he cooed, „I didn’t know you had a girlfriend, Tsukishima! Please teach me your methods, please, PLEASE!“ 

Time went by in the speed of a spiked volleyball, so the announcement to prepare for the first match came faster than expected. Several parts of the crowd inside the room started moving, gathering or walking out to the gym already. 

Tsukishima put on his sports glasses, you did your best to distract Yamaguchi from the upcoming adrenaline. Not that it really worked, but internally he was glad to have someone that was talking to him about something else than facing strong teams. In this case how your boyfriend would look stunning in glasses with a pink frame.

„You should go back to your seat. Akiteru is probably waiting for you,“ he advised you once Coach Ukai had told the team to get together. 

Now was your moment to leave - In the battles he was about to fight on court you couldn’t do anything but watch from afar. For sure you were intending to clap and scream until your hands and throat would be sore, maybe annoying a specific middle blocker of Karasuno in the process.

One last time Tsukishima turned around to send you off.

„Break a finger, Kei!“

He gave you a thumbs up, the corners of his lips slightly poking towards the ceiling. Then he switched back to his serious mode in order to crush their opponents. 

-----

Posted: April 9th 2020 | Requests: Open | Match-ups: Closed

#haikyuu!! #haikyuu writing #haikyuu scenario #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu tsukishima #tsukishima kei #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima kei x reader

[liljungie]

MVP | Jeon Jungkook | part 4

Pairing: [soccer player] jungkook x reader

Warnings: angst SO MUCH ANGST

Parts:

One / two / three

Masterlist

A/N: let me know if you like what happened in this part Please.

_

After you shut your bedroom door behind you, you heard him sigh loudly then his footsteps walked away from your door.

Without another word, without a fight, without a last kiss, he didn't try to reassure you..tell you you're the one he'll be with, he didn't prove you how wrong you were about him and his intentions and that he actually wanted you and is willing to fight the world for you.

Your heart shattered completely, you wanted him to argue with you, you wanted to hear him say I love you and mean it whole heartedly you wanted him to be yours so desperately because you couldn't escape the way you loved him, you wanted him to burst right through your door and argue or talk until the two of you made up again.

Loving him is starting to hurt,

How much your heart is full of love for him but his is far from your reach, it made the heat crawl up on your skin, you hated yourself for loving him this deep and this much, you hated how crazy he made you feel, you hated how no matter what happens he will always have your heart.

With a shaky breath you gathered the bit of energy you had left in you and started to clean your room from the shattered glass, even though you were out of your mind when you were collecting the pieces, all you could think of was him, the way he laughs and his captivating smile and those chocolate eyes of his.

You could picture him, looking at you with those eyes, if you only knew the lies and everything he hid behind them maybe you wouldn't have fallen for him.

3 days later and your roommate was still not back yet...

You figured hoped if jungkook actually broke up with her she'd be back by morning that night crying her heart out..but she didn't so he didn't..he didn't do anything.

you knew he wouldn't.

You thought if he had the least bit of interest in you he'd do anything to prove how wrong you are about him, but him leaving without putting up a fight proved the biggest point of all; If he wanted you your roommate would be here instead of being with him at God knows where.

You didn't bother to call her and ask about her whereabouts you actually didn't care about her or him or anything anymore you just were trying to pass your life by without any drama. You've had enough.

You decided to go on with your life, waiting for him would only break you more because deep down in you, you knew he'll never be yours. surely playing pretend for awhile was nice but now it's not and you hate to admit it but you regret it all.

You didn't regret loving him it was out of your control and anyone would fall between the cracks if they had that level of intimacy with someone.

Although you just wished things were different, you wish he didn't belong to anybody else, it would have been easier but nothing ever comes easy, not for you it seems. feeding your high hopes only made you drown in the disappointment of them not happening so you pushed all thoughts of them, of him happening aside and moved on with your life.

It was a hell lot easier, even though that was a lie you told yourself every day.

///

You walk towards the cafeteria to get something to eat, your stomach hurting you and it was making noises at this point which embarrassed you.

you rarely ate the past few days thanks to Jungkook.

Even though he was out of your sight he wasn't out of your mind,the minute you wanted to do or focus on something the thought of him would steal all of your attention.

Your brain wasn't cooperating with you anymore, you didn't even cry over him which hurt more, your heart felt heavy with sorrow and you wanted nothing more than to cry but you couldn't.

You didn't know which would hurt more crying it out or holding it all in and hoping it would vanish without causing you any harm...

You tried to walk faster so no one you knew could stop you to say hello because you really needed to eat before you went in this one class that drained you, even on your best days.

You jumped out of your skin when you felt a hand smack your books out of your grip, making them all fall around your feet you sigh in annoyance and turn your head to glare at a very satisfied jimin, you knew it, "good morning _____!" He cheerfully greets you and you want nothing more than to slap him.

"Morning," you sigh again and drop to your knees to gather your books "and jimin I'm not in the mood please leave me be" you tell him softly as you stand up fixing yourself.

At that he frowns that's not like you, you'd slap him or yell at him or hit him back.

"You okay?" He asks trying to look at your face that was hiding behind your hair he see you hum and nod biting your lip "I'm fine don't worry"you say quickly trying to end the conversation as soon as possible so you don't have to face jungkook who might be trailing behind jimin. You didn't want to look behind jimin to make sure either you just want to flee.

"Bye now" you say behind you, picking up your walking pace which makes jimin raise his eyebrows and frown this definitely wasn't like you at all.

He walked faster to catch up with you holding your wrist and turing you around to face him "not so fast!", you stare at him shocked "jimin seriously?" You ask furious now.

Why is he all of the sudden the caring jimin you used to know before he joined the football team.

You wished he could just take a hint and leave you be but jimin was dense and stubborn.

"Yes seriously what is wrong with you?!" He asks loudly and you thank the heavens that there's no one in the hallway you place your hand over his plump lips to shush him slamming him against the wall "are you trying to get us expelled? Classes are in session!" You whisper shouted at him his eyes were wide at the way you pressed him to the wall.

"I'm okay, okay? Stop annoying me can you do that? Just for today at least" You ask your hand still on top of his lips his eyes staring into yours as he nods furiously so you let him go, a smile form on your face.

"Good boy!" You pat his hair letting your hands fall to your sides, you decided to tease him a bit before you leave and placed a kiss on his cheek near enough to his lips but not quite, he stood still not believing what's happening but not minding it either, you giggle at how stiff and flustered he is and walk away leaving him speechless.

He places his hand where you kissed him and looks at you disappear in the crowd.

You actually kissed him, you really did. he thought. he couldn't help but let out a light hearted laugh and walked back to his class.

Both of you didn't notice jungkook staring at you two from afar watching the whole encounter wishing he was where jimin stood. In your arms, face to face with you just how he always wanted.

Feeling bitter; he dialed a number and walked away biting the inside of his cheek waiting for the other line to pick up, he's not losing you.

Not to jimin!

Jealousy ate him up bit by bit.

Just the thought alone made him furious wishing he showed you how much he wanted you how much he craved you, all of you. he wished he had devoured you like he originally planned to do before you broke down crying.

You and your 'moods' always got in his plans and that always frustrated him, he wasn't going to lie; he didn't know how to handle you sometimes which made him like having you around.

Everything about you frustrated him but not everything about you was his favorite kind of frustration, if you would only loosened up he might have been yours.

Yet, he did not want jimin to have you.

He loves you, yes.

Would he ever tell you? Probably not.

And he wants to keep it this way until he figures things out with his girlfriend, if he ever does.

[4:55 pm]

Before you reached your apartment you could hear voices inside, you didn't think much of it and swinged the door open, not noticing jungkook who was standing in front of the door his back facing you but when he heard the door open he slightly turned to see who it was.

he knew it was you, which made him more excited to steal a glance at you, coming through.

Your breath got stuck in your throat when your eyes finally landed on his figure near the door, your heart froze, he was so close but so far away, suddenly every wall you built up started to break apart the more you look at him.

"Oh hey _____!" Your roommate, who was very much still his girlfriend, peaked from the living room greeting you way too cheerfully.

"Hey" you smiled at her walking past jungkook, not even sparing him another glance your arms brush against each other making the hair on his skin stand up, all he wanted to do was grab you and hold you in his arms and he tried his hardest not to.

"What are you doing?" You asked when you see all of her stuff, mostly clothes, on the couch, "I'm moving out!" Your eyes at that widen "why?" You ask thinking of the reasons before she uttered a word

'Is she and jungkook moving in together?'

'Is she moving into jungkook's dorm instead? But jungkook already had a roommate!'

'Was she pregnant with his child?!'

She let out a laugh "I'm messing with you, I'm going to busan for the holidays with kook" she told you making another bang hit your heart, you tried to seem unfazed "oh really" You say your face drained of color, you didn't know why you were disappointed but you were.

She glances at her boyfriend before she turns to you and whispers "He wants me to meet his parents!" she squealed silently

She's joking.

There's no way.

No!

You wanted to scream at him then and there but you couldn't, you felt your blood boil and your heart was beating uncontrollably.

Meeting his parents meant he was serious about her and their relationship which made your world collapse.

You were right about him, he was only using you.

You felt tears start in your eyes at the realization that was far more painful than seeing them smile at each other "I'm happy for you" you tell her holding the strap of your bag tightly around your shoulder, trying not to break then and there infront of the couple.

"_____? You don't look too good" you hear her whisper, at that jungkook ears perk up and concern was written on his face he steps closer to the two of you wanting to look at you to see what's wrong but decided not to, he stood his ground. close enough to you.

You let out a forced laugh wipping away the tears that escaped from your eyes "oh I'm fine!" You giggle "today was just a busy day no worries I'm gonna go wash up, have fun at busan!" you say carefully walking away from the living room trying not to brush against him again.

she shrugged her shoulders and continued to fold her clothes in the bag, you could feel his eyes on you as you walked away, you made sure to glare him when you turned to close your bedroom door your eyes pierce through him like lazier, your face was stone cold as you slammed the door shut in his face, sliding down against it crying softly placing your hands on your mouth to muffle your sobs.

It was all your fault, this was your doing, you could have said no you could have ran away, you knew how bad it is to want something you couldn't have.

This was your karma for what you did in the past,you thought. this was your karma for rejecting jimin, a year ago.

You didn't believe in it until your turn came and tasted just how awful rejection is.

[ December ]

You didn't like how jimin behaved lately he was acting closed off and quite.

Which wasn't him at all, every time you'd touch him or step closer to him he'd be stiff or he'd push you away lightly but you knew he didn't want you near him.

You've had enough on Christmas day when you and him were hanging the ornaments on the tree the only thing that was left was the big gold star on top.

Usually jimin would lift you up and you'd put it on top the tree with ease and he'd gently put you down both of you would smile after, his arms around you holding you tight telling you that you did a great job.

The last Christmas though was odd,he wasn't singing Christmas songs with you while he helped you decorate the tree, he wasn't joking around with you with the mistletoe, he used to hang it above you and tell you to kiss him only for you to shove him off laughing your heart out.

it was time for you to put the gold star on top, you turned to him smiling as the star dangle from your fingers "it's time jimine" he avoided your eyes "I'll go grab the ladder" he told you walking away you frowned, ladder? He always carried you.

All you could see was red you slammed the star on the table, it even left a mark on your palm and marched your way to him stopping him from walking further, you were furious "what is wrong with you?" You yelled not caring that his parents were sound asleep upstairs his eyes were wide staring at you "nothing!" He responded trying to push past you, to avoid you"you just got fat I don't want to be crushed" you gasped, your hand smacked his cheek.

"You know what jimin" you angrily sighed "fuck you!" You spat watching his face fall "ever since you joined that stupid football team you became the biggest douch ever worse than that jeon guy!" Your lips trembling trying to keep yourself from crying.

He laughed "but he sure knows how to get your pants wet" you shoved him "he doesn't even love you like that!" He said again glaring you "grow up _____! When are you going to realize that he'll never love you the way you love him!" Jimin screamed at you.

Your heart was hammering against your ribcage making it hard to breath as you just stared at your best friend break you apart, your tears fell helplessly.

Jimin was heartbroken to hurt you like this, he knew he crossed the line but he just couldn't take it anymore, he loved you, he adored you and he just didn't want to continue living like this, seeing you; the love of his life, be in love someone like jungkook!

"The crush you have on him is going to kill you!" He cried "I hate to break it to you but jungkook is in a relationship! He can't and won't be with you!"

You knew that. you knew your roommate was his girlfriend. but you couldn't stop your feelings and you knew jungkook felt the same, you both didn't act on it back then but he felt something for you, you knew he did, because he constantly was over and he'd talk to you more than his girlfriend and flirt with you when she wasn't around.

"Why are you saying this?" You cry "why would you say that you basterd!" You shove him again but this time he held both of your hands that were ready to claw his eyes out if you could and pulled you closer "because I'm the one who loves you!" He shouted

You froze at his words, your heart beats slowed down,your body went cold "what?" You asked shaking, if it wasn't for him holding you tightly surely your legs would have given up on you.

"I love you" he paused to swallow " I always have and I always will" he told you as he stared at you with admiration he moved your hair out of your face then you felt his fingers trace your lips and move down to hold your chin, you shake your head pushing him away.

"Is this one of your pranks?" You said wiping away your tears as his heart broke into a million pieces his hands were still in air from the shock "because it's not funny!" You shouted, his parents were now on top of the stairs watching you both silently.

His chest was heaving up and down, he was trying his best to stay calm and not smash your head against the wall, why couldn't you understand?

'Why were you so naive?! did it really not cross your mind at all? All the hints he'd drop really went unnoticed?' he thought.

Why couldn't you understand that he isn't jungkook! Why couldn't you understand that other people are capable of loving you, yet you only cared about jungkook's love for you, tossing everything and everyone else aside, it tore him apart and he couldn't take it anymore.

"For fuck sake _____ I'm not joking!" He stepped closer to you "look at me, do I look like I'm joking?..is any of this funny to you?" He asked trapping you between him and the wall behind you.

The realization hit you like a brick to the head, his eyes bore into yours waiting for an answer.

If only eyes could speak, his eyes would scream how much he loved you and count all the reasons why he loved you.

But yours were empty, you couldn't say anything you just cried and pushed him away lightly which made him cry too as he looks at you with dispare "I don't jimin" you whispered choking on your tears..

With that being said you ran out of his house, not caring about the snow that started to fall, not caring that you were only in your pajamas and your fuzzy slippers in the winter, running in the streets like a maniac.

That Christmas was surely one to remember...

[Present Day]

Day turned into night and your apartment was dead silent, you checked her room and surely she was gone.

You were left all alone with your thoughts, your painful thoughts.

You couldn't get him off of your mind, you couldn't shake away the feeling of his arm brushing against yours, that spot burned you constantly. You love him and hate him at once and it drove you insane.

You hated how much of a coward he is, you hated how he used you over and over again and when he knew deep down you're not the one he wanted. you hated how he had the heart to continue his relationship with her even though he cheated on her and who knows if you were the only one... maybe there's a whole group of girls who were used and tossed to the side.

It was so stupid of you to ever think he'll want you enough to break up with the hottest girl he ever laid eyes on.

Ever since highschool.

Every guy had his eyes on her and because everything to jungkook was a competition he took it upon himself to 'score' her, you and your friends had a bet that she'd last two weeks,tops. but here you are, years later and they're still together.

Going over all of that in your mind you're not sure if jungkook is a guy you'd love for all your life, you're not sure he's even worth it, if he had the heart to lie straight to her face he surely lied to you.

Once a cheater always a cheater.

Although you hate to admit it but jimin was right all along, he called it before it even happened.

guess you should have trusted him, he was his best friend after all so of course he knew jungkook like the back of his hand, sure this year jimin acted just like jungkook at times but you knew who jimin was deep down and you hated yourself for breaking him the way you did.

instead of spending your holidays depressed wasting away in your dorm room alone,you started getting ready, knowing someone that would welcome you warmly despite everything that happened; Jimin.

You bumped into taehyung a few hours ago and he mentioned that jimin went to busan to visit his parents, so you prepared a bag filled with clothes and a few snacks for the long car ride and off you went.

[ 10:30 pm ]

You tossed your bag in the small hotel room, locking the door shut and walking back to your car.

Your fingers hover over jimin's contact in your phone, still debating whether to call him or not but it's now or never you're already here and his house is a few minutes away from the hotel.

The same hotel you crashed in the night you ranaway from rejected him.

You decide not to call him and just show up unannounced so you drove off to his house, hoping you still remember his neighborhood and hoping that his parents don't kick you out from their porch.

Your hands on the steering wheel were shaking as you practiced what you wanted to say over a thousand times, the nervousness overwhelmed you and you just hope to God his parents accept your apology and that jimin forgives you.

Because after that night jimin didn't talk about what happened and you were too embarrassed to dig into it so it just slipped, and you continued your friendship with jimin.even though it wasn't the same, you still were friends.

And no matter how much you pushed the thought of that night away you still owe jimin an apology more than his parents who also deserved an apology, not only you ruined their christmas but you also broke their son's heart.

_

Jungkook was miserable.

He hated how much his girlfriend kept nagging the whole car ride, nothing could shut her up.

He tried to hold her hand, stroke her thigh, sing to her, he bought her favourite snacks to munch on...nothing worked!

She kept crying about how much her feet killed her from sitting down for hours in the car and how she wanted to lay down because her back started to hurt.

Only then he realized what a huge mistake he had made, he only wanted to make you jealous he wanted you to break and come running into his arms but that's not what you did and it made him go mad.

With another whine from her he stopped the car in a halt,he sighed loudly rubbing  his face "why did you stop kook?" She asked looking at him with worry he glanced at her and sighed "I'm so sorry babe it completely slipped my mind...I-" he sighed again trying to come up with a lie"my parents are visiting my brother in Rome" he lied, he had enough, this is not the girl he wanted his parents to meet.

He wasn't gonna go through with it in the first place he just hoped it worked long enough to fool you.

"What!" She yelled, his ears started to buzz from her tone "and you decided to tell me that halfway there? god jungkook!" She rolled her eyes at him while he shrugged his shoulders "I can drive to Rome if you still want to go" he joked making a U turn and driving at the fastest speed he could to return her home and to see you.

"Take me home Jeon!" She said with gritted teeth making him snort, a smirk playing on his face "as you wish princess" she roll her eyes at him.

And oh boy this ride felt so much lighter not only she was disappointed but she stayed silent, jungkook's heart was at ease knowing he's on his way back to you.

This time he'll make it right.

This time he'll do it right.

This time he won't let you go until you're his.

_

#jeon jungguk #jungkook #jungkook imagine #jungkook smut #jeon jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x jimin #jimin x you #jimin x reader #jimin x y/n #bts imagines #bts fanfic #bts smut #jeon jungkook imagine #jeon jungkook smut #jeon jungkook scenarios #jungkook scenarios #jeongguk #jungkook imagines #jeon jungkook au #jeon jungkook angst #bts au

[basiccortez]

Defenseless Ch. 2

synopsis: CJ Jackson, looks like she has it all. Fancy car, fancy house, name  brand clothing. Her parents, top boosters to Beverly, with money to make all sorts of situations go away. As well as the Jackson family looks put together, past secrets haunt them. With the new transfer student catching the eye of CJ Jackson, can old friendships be fixed. Or are somethings just meant to stay broken. "I told you, as long as I live, no one would know."

word count: 5.2k 

pairing: Jordan Baker x OC (CJ Jackson) 

warnings: talk of drugs, talk of addiction, talk of a juvenile being in trouble, teen drinking, language, high school boys being high school boys. 

"Maybe, we shouldn't have kept her in that school."

"Chris, we talked about this. The best way for her to contain a normal life is by staying there."

"You didn't hear her cry today, Pauline." She could hear his heavy sigh, "That baby has lost everything, and you know how teenagers can be. I don't want to lose her anymore than we already have."

"I can email Mrs. Riley, and tell the boys to be on the lookout for her. You know Colton won't let anything slip."

CJ heard her dad's loud laughter from the spot she sat. She sat on the dark staircase behind the kitchen wall listening to her parents talk. After she had come home from her terrible dance rehearsal, she had hid in her room all night doing homework and listening to music.

"Oh I know," Her dad said, "Cobe won't let anything slip either. Carver has some pull with the football boys. Roman will help too."

"What more of an Army does one girl need." Her mother said.

CJ smiled weakly, thinking of all the boys in her life. Cobe, the eldest Jackson boy, was a senior, and a soccer star. He ruled the field much like he ruled the school being the student body preside. And, holds the title like if he were the king. Every booster presentation, he wore his best suit and tie, cleaned his shoes, and had his waves done perfectly. The whole Jackson family thought he would go to Stanford or Yale, his dream colleges, but he caught them all off guard by joining the Army when he turned 18. Their mother was pissed, and didn't talk to him for 2 days. Pauline sat down with her oldest, scolded him for not telling her, but listened to his side, and supported him.

Colton and CJ were twins. Colton being the older one, and not letting CJ live that down, at all. They both had the biggest brown eyes, ones that looked like pools of honey when the sunlight caught them. Colton's main focus was basketball, and everything basketball. There were times that he wished he was named after the great Kobe Bryant. But Cobe always reminded that he should've been born first. Colton was yet to commit anywhere, wanting to wait until after his junior year. He was praying for UCLA or LSU.

Carver was the youngest Jackson sibling, being a sophomore, and an amazing tight-end, getting his dad's football talent. Even as a sophomore, he had offers already, but much like Colton, he was waiting until senior year. Carver, even though as athletic as the other brothers, was also involved in other things. Music was his passion, growing up with old "cook-out" music- as their father would say- lead him to wanting to be a music major. Carver's room was littered with vinyl records, concert posters, and 8-tracks. CJ and Carver could spend hours arguing about the main message behind Tupac's Dear Mama.

Roman was the last boy in CJ's life. He, unlike the other boys, was not related to CJ. Roman was also on the football team, and played defensive end. He was a junior like CJ and Colton. Roman had basically lived in the Jackson house, being best friends with Colton, and dating Carver. Roman and Carver had been dating for almost 2 years now, and no one knew besides the Jackson family.

Carver was out to the school, and everyone couldn't be prouder of him. Carver wasn't afraid to be who he was. The boys on the football team accepted him. But Roman, was fearful of what his parents would do. He grew up in church, and hearing his mother curse about the pride parade every year in Beverly Hills. He was terrified about what his football friends would say. Yeah, they accepted Carver, but that didn't stop the whispers in the locker room when Carver would leave.

"He was totally starring at your junk," "If he tackles you, he might get hard" "Don't catch the ball like a fairy" "I don't wanna be the only one in the showers with him," "We should get rainbow uniforms" "Maybe he would do better on the cheer team"

All the siblings had heard the whispers and rallied around Carver. CJ was Carver's biggest fan, and biggest fighter. She had taken Carver to his first pride parade when he was in 8th grade. It broke Carver when CJ was sent away. He would visit her every weekend, and send letters nonstop. He was thrilled when she came home early. But like everyone else, he had a reputation to uphold. So even he turned his back on her at school today.

"It'll all work out for her, she's too strong to let anything break her." Pauline said coming up to her husband. She wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her cheek to his back, "Where are they anyway? It's too quiet."

"CJ is around the corner." Chris said and CJ froze. "You've been sitting on those stairs since you were a little girl. Can't believe there's no ass print in the wood yet."

"Chris!" Pauline said laughing. CJ let out a laugh and stood up from the stairs. She walked into the kitchen in her baggy basketball shorts and a loose t-shirt, that was probably one of her brothers, "Hey baby girl." Pauline kissed CJ's forehead, as she walked over to the oven to get dinner out, "Cauliflower steaks- request from Cobe, with  asparagus, zucchini, mushroom sauce. Pasta salad and mac n cheese for a side. Apple pie for dessert, request from-"

"Me! Ain't no more goofy ass fake ass-"

"Finish that sentence, Colton, I dare you." Mom said giving Colton her famous glare. Colton shut his mouth real quick and kissed his mom's cheek as he came and grabbed a water out of the fridge, "Boy! Go shower too! You stank!"

"Smell of success, momma!" Colton said lifting his arms up, and showing off the pit stains on his red t-shirt.

"Ugh! Who the hell let the skunk in?" Cobe said coming down the stairs and smelling Colton.

"You think you got jokes, Pres?" Colton said walking over to his older brother.

"At least he don't smell like an onion." Carver said, Roman tagging along behind him, coming into the kitchen.

"Y'all all smell!" CJ said laughing. All the boys looked at each other, before all running over to CJ.

The girl squealed and took off running from her brothers. She ran towards the opening to the living room, but Cobe ran around the other side and blocked her. She quickly turned towards the dinning room, where Carver was waiting for her. Carver ran towards her, and CJ turned around running towards the kitchen again, where her dad was ready to catch her. She dodged past her dad, and was quickly picked up in strong arms. She fought against them until she was thrown into the pool.

"Ah!" She screamed as she hit the cold water. She came up from the water splashing, and laughed as she saw all 4 men, plus Roman laughing on the pool side, "Y'all think y'all funny?"

"Oh we real funny." Colton said.

"You children!" Pauline laughed coming out of the kitchen. She threw her dish towel over her shoulder and crossed her arms. All 5 males turned towards her and froze, "Y'all done with the games?"

"Yes ma'am." They all answered at the same time.

"Good. Cobe, you're gym bag does not live by the front door, pick it up. Colton, I know I didn't raise you to smell like a garbage can, hit the shower. Carver, see that table in there, set it. Roman, you can help him. Mr. Jackson, that  salad ain't gonna make itself." Pauline said, and all the boys went their instructed ways, "And you," She said looking at her daughter who was soaking wet in the pool, "Dry off and get clean."

The next day, The Jackson siblings all arrived together in their shiny white Jeep Wrangler. Colton parked the car next to Roman's black Tahoe. CJ used to joke that Roman looked like security detail for a famous person driving that black SUV around.

"Morning, Jacksons." Roman said to the bunch as they got out of the car. Roman gave a head nod to Carver. Carver rolled his eyes and slammed the door shut.

"You going to Mrs. Riley first?" Colton asked his younger sister.

"Have to every day." CJ answered and Colton sighed, "Go on, I'll be fine."

"Mom said to look-"

"I know what mom said," CJ cut off Cobe, "But I can handle myself."

"You can eat lunch with me and Alana." Cobe offered to his sister, who just scrunched her nose up.

"If there's anyone that I hate more than Emily Pierce, it's Alana Kadee." CJ said and pulled her bag over her loose t-shirt, "I'll be fine. Besides, I have him." CJ smiled seeing Spencer waiting behind her group of brothers, "Bye."

The boys watched as CJ pushed through them and over to Spencer James, who greeted the Jackson girl with a wide smile. The two of them walked into school together, and could fell all eyes on them.

"We trust him?" Colton asked the guys.

"He a good guy, little rough on the team player shit, but he's good." Roman said.

"As long as he don't do pull a Jordan Baker on her, I'm fine with it." Cobe said and the guys agreed. "Ain't no man gonna hurt my sister again."

CJ had battled her way through Anatomy, composition, and physics by the time the lunch bell had rang. Spencer waited outside of the girl's classroom and walked with her to lunch. Spencer talked about practice and a pool party at the Baker household. CJ was quiet and let Spencer vent practice and how it went.

"So how was it hanging out with the steroid set?" CJ asked, as she picked up a piece of her sushi.

"Are you serious?" Spencer asked the girl.

CJ laughed and shook her head, "I'm kidding. I used to mess with them and say that."

Spencer laughed and studied the girl before asking, "What happened between you and them? They know you, but they act like they don't wanna know you."

CJ took a deep breath, she knew this would come up sooner or later, "We used to be close, and then things happened. They became football stars and I became the. . .social pariah of Beverly High school."

"Man, shut up you're cool." Spencer said.

"Okay, yeah, says the new guy." CJ joked, "It's shocking, I know, but no one is eager to hang out with juvie girl, post detention center."

"Juvie? Elaborate."

"I just went down a bad path, things happened out of my control." CJ shrugged, "Parents paid a big time lawyer to help me out, and here I am. 75k and 90 days later. I'm fine now, just 90 days of parole."

"Is it?" Spencer asked, looking into her honey brown eyes.

CJ was about to answer, when a tray was placed loudly down on the table. The Jackson girl looked up and saw Cobe swinging his leg over the lunch table bench. Before CJ could protest him sitting there, Roman pulled up next to her. Carver sat his stuff down on the other side of Spencer, and Colton decided to nestle himself right in between CJ and Spencer. CJ rolled her eyes and leaned forward to still talk to Spencer.

"Spencer, meet the other, uglier versions of me. Cobe, Colton, Carver, and Roman- the adopted brother." CJ said introducing the boys.

"Nice to meet you," Spencer said politely, greeting all of the boys.

"Welcome to Beverly, I'm Colton, older twin, basketball star, black belt."

"He's lying." "I'm not lying." The twins said at the same time. CJ glared at her twin brother, as a familiar female voice started speaking.

"Spencer?" The voice asked, "Oh hey Jackson brothers, and Roman."

"Hey Layla," Carver answered the light-skinned girl.

"I'm throwing a party at my place tonight. It's just a small team thing, to celebrate the start of the season, and I was hoping you could make it." Layla spoke. CJ looked down at her food and picked at it as she was talking. Cobe could feel the tension rolling off of his younger sister's body, and wanted to yell at Layla for even approaching them.

"Yeah, for sure. We'll try to come by for a bit." Roman answered for the boys. Layla smiled at him and looked at CJ.

"Great," Layla said to the table, "Bye CJ." CJ looked up at Layla as she walked away and didn't say anything. The boys all looked at CJ who just rolled her eyes. Colton watched Spencer, as his head followed Layla as she walked away, and gave him a look.

"What?" Spencer asked.

"A, she's taken. That's Asher's girlfriend, okay?" Colton said.

"And B, those parties, I'd stay clear." CJ spoke up.

Spencer agreed, but there was a look in his eye that gave away his true intentions. The lunch bell rang, dismissing the teens back to class. CJ said goodbye to the boys before heading to Mrs. Riley's room for a check in and get her community service project.  Her project was based out of Crenshaw Community Center. She'd be tutoring elementary and middle school children in Science.

When dance practice rolled around, CJ was determined to take her spot back. CJ was the first one dressed and in the gym for practice. It gave her enough time to turn her phone on and go over the Countdown dance, like it was supposed to be done.

Jordan could hear the music from down the hall as he walked Hadley to the locker room, "Are you late?" He asked his girlfriend.

"No. . . it must be Emily practicing. No matter how hard she tries, she will never be CJ good. That girl is amazing, the way she can move. Looks just like her mom when she's dancing." Hadley spoke.

"Yeah. I remember all those dance awards on her walls." Jordan smiled remembering going to her competitions, "I should get going," Jordan kissed Hadley goodbye before walking down the hallway towards the music coming from the gym.

Jordan stood in the doorway in awe, watching the way CJ flawlessly moved around the space. She was completely lost in the tempo of the song playing. Her body was telling a story, and so was the song she chose. Jordan could see the pain that was coming across in her movements. The way it looked like she couldn't catch the beat, but she was perfectly on time.

"Just don't give up, I am working it out. Please don't give in, I won't let you down. It messed me up, need a second to breathe. Just keep coming around. Hey, whataya want from me. Whataya want from me?"

Jordan couldn't help but feel guilt listening to the words. The song was picked for a reason, and CJ knew it. He watched as she flawlessly leaped into the air, and land it perfectly. Her turns were executed without any hesitation and with full control. When the music finished, she ended on her knees, her chest moving up and down rapidly as her eyes were closed, trying to slow her heart rate.

Jordan didn't know if he should clap or say something, before he could move he heard clapping from the other side of the gym. CJ opened her eyes and briefly glanced at Jordan before looking to where the sound was coming. Spencer James walked into the gym, a wide smile on his face, and CJ stood up from the ground. Jordan left as Spencer started talking to the girl. He headed down to the football locker room, trying even harder to forget about CJ Jackson.

"That was. . . amazing." Spencer spoke to the light skin girl.

"Thanks. I listened to a lot of music in juvie, and this was one of my favorite songs. It spoke to me." CJ said and her eyes drifted over to where Jordan was standing.

"Well it was amazing." Spencer said.

"It was," The pair was cut off by a familiar annoying voice breaking into the gym, "Excuse me, Spencer is it? You need to leave, closed practice. And CJ, next time you want extra ''practice'' run it by the captain first." Emily said to the two.

"Show more later?" Spencer asked CJ and the girl smiled, watching Spencer walk off.

"I don't know what you're trying to do, but you will never hold the captain spot again. You might have been the best dancer in the conference, but not anymore." Emily sneered to CJ. CJ took one step getting in Emily's face, and could feel the girl uncomfortable by the sudden conforntation.

"The only person who won't be holding a captain spot anymore is you. And trust me sis, it's not me who needs the extra practice. The mess you call a dance, is a shit show and you know it. It's a Beyonce song, and you ain't it sweetie.  You are more like. . ." CJ paused looking the ginger girl up and down, "Chanel West Coast, and I'm Nicki Minaj. No competition at all."

CJ pushed past Emily, and grabbed her water bottle as the rest of the dance team started filling in the gym. Emily walked over to a group of girls and yelled at them to start stretching. Mrs. Williams came into the gym and set down her clipboard and called all the girls together.

"We are learning a new dance today, and CJ will be teaching it." Mrs. Williams said. CJ smirked as she felt Emily's glare on her back, "So let's get ready. Spread out."

"Chrisy?" Her mother spoke, knocking on her bedroom door. CJ sat up from the blankets she was buried under and paused the Twilight movie she was watching, "No plans tonight? It's a Friday night."

"These are my plans." CJ said pointing to a half naked Taylor Lautner on her TV screen.

"Half naked werewolf boys aren't a plan." Pauline laughed and walked over to sit on her daughter's bed, "I know that there is a team party at Layla's tonight."

"I know. I knew I probably couldn't go anyway."

"Your curfew is midnight, on the dot, no later. Colton will drive you and Dad will pick you up."

"Mom, are you say. . ."

"You have been through enough. Your Dad, Mrs. Riley, and I talked, we agreed that going to a team party with your brothers was okay. As long as you promise you can pass a drug test tomorrow morning."

CJ jumped up from her bed and hugged her mother tightly. Pauline smiled and hugged her daughter back. It was the first time in months that the two have hugged each other like this, in a happy moment.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" CJ squealed.

"You're welcome. Now get dress, child, you look a mess. And no Jackson child of mine will be looking a mess." Pauline said smiling at her daughter. CJ smiled at her mother and then jumped up towards her closet. CJ invited her mother to stay and help her get ready for the party.

Pauline, her mother, was a retired Dallas Cowgirl dancer, and now an editor for Vogue. Pauline had met Chris Jackson after the Chiefs had played the Cowboys, and it was love at first sight. She had grown up in east Oakland, and had come from nothing. She danced to put herself through college, which she ended up getting her degree in Dance. She worked hard for what she wanted, and wanted people to know that. She expected the best out of her kids, and wanted them to always put their best foot forward.

CJ let her mom fix her box braids, pulling them half up, half down. She wore a baggy black Aliyah t-shirt with a stripped long sleeve underneath it. Her jeans were loose with more hole then there were jean. She pulled on her crisp white air forces and smiled at herself.

"Beautiful." Pauline smiled and kissed her daughter's forehead, "Remember, midnight. Colton's downstairs waiting for you."

CJ nodded and headed downstairs where her twin was waiting. CJ and Colton made their way to the lime green 1972 camaro, which was Colton's baby. He only brought it out for important events such as parties, homecoming, dates, and prom.

"Scratch the paint, and you're dead." He told his twin as she opened the door to the car.

The party was in full swing when they arrived. The door to the Keating household was wide open, and you could hear the music from down the street. Teens were on couches doing bong hits, shots, making out. Red solo cups were in almost every teen hand. Splashes could be seen as the glass doors to the outside were pulled back.

"Hey Colt!" A half naked JJ said as he came up to the twins, "CJ, my girl." JJ tried to hug the twins but they both pushed him back seeing as he was soaking wet.

"Leave it to JJ to make me feel somewhat welcome." CJ said to her brother. He smirked and threw his arm over her shoulder.

"You are welcome, you always have been. If they don't accept you, you don't need them. Now come on, I guarantee there is a Sprite tropic berry with your name on it."

At some point during the party, the siblings had broken away from each other. Colton was probably in some room with one of the many girls at the party. And CJ sat alone, her feet swinging over the side of the deck, as looked at the California hills. It was peaceful for her, she hadn't seen the lights of the city like this in a long time. The view of Layla's house had been one of the many things she liked about it.

"You lost?" Jordan Baker said standing behind her. CJ sighed and didn't say anything, but swing her legs back to the side of the deck, and stand up. She brushed herself off and started walking away from Jordan, "Where are you going?"

"Away. I know when I'm not wanted somewhere." She said to the QB. Jordan sighed and grabbed her arm stopping her in her tracks. CJ tore her arm away from his grasp and looked at him, "You dumb or had one too many concussions?"

"CJ. . ."

"Your parents made it pretty damn clear what they expect from you and Olivia. And that's to stay away from me. So why don't you do that." CJ sneered.

"CJ, Jesus Christ, would you just stop!" Jordan said trying to stop her again, "I wanted to say sorry, and just talk to you."

"Sorry? You wanted to say 'sorry'? Sorry isn't going to suffice. What would've been the epic sorry would've been telling the truth that day, but you couldn't do that."

"CJ I-"

"It's fine, Jordan. Now leave me alone." CJ said and turned on her heel, and trying to get as far away from that party as possible. She knew she shouldn't have been there, but she thought, maybe if they were all drunk they'd forget about the mistakes that were made last year.

CJ woke up with the worst possible headache that she could have. And she hadn't even been drinking. Her parents had woken her up bright in early to go to the scrimmage game. The boosters were invited, meaning her parents. So CJ sat on the cold bleachers with her green cardigan on, shivering in the cool morning. She watched her mother hand Carver and Roman each a water bottle and a snack. Cobe was busy introducing the boosters to the football coaches and showing them the additions to the football stadium.

"Why am I here?" CJ asked her mother.

"Learning how to be a football wife." Pauline joked, causing the young girl to laugh, "I will never understand why women spend so much on botox and fake boobs." Pauline glanced over at JJ's mother, who had just gotten her 2nd boob job done.

"Cause black don't crack, but white sure do." CJ said and Pauline shoved her shoulder laughing, "Let's go Carvy!" CJ cheered watching her younger brother run on to the field.

"That number 11 looks rough." Her dad pointed out, coming to sit by his wife and daughter, "Thought that was supposed to be wonder boy, looks like under boy to me."

CJ looked at Spencer, who was getting the snot beat out of him. He looked awful, and completely out of it. CJ wondered what had happened when she left the party last night. Every play that was made to Spencer, he messed it up in some way. Each time the offense would walk off the field, he looked beat and tired. At the end of the scrimmage, Spencer walked off the field looking defeated. Carver had made his way over to were his parents and sister were standing.

"Nice work, young man." Chris said patting his son on the shoulders, "Almost as good as me."

"I am as good as you."

"What's up with that James kid?" Pauline asked her youngest.

"No clue, but dude reeks like a party bus. Him and JJ must've had a competition last night." Carver said looking over at where Spencer was now talking to Jordan and Asher, "Or those two did something."

The Jackson family turned and watched a heated argument breakout. Spencer threw his helmet down and lunged towards Asher. CJ gasped and took a step forward, but Chris put his arm out in front of her, stopping her movement. The family watched Billy Baker came and controlled Spencer, and the assistant coach take Jordan and Asher away from the spectacle. CJ looked at the rest of the boosters who were also looking at the show in front of them. Cobe was quick to catch CJ's pleading glance to get them out of here, and somewhere else.

"Alright, let's go see where the best team, my team, the soccer team is practicing." Cobe said and the boosters followed him out of the football stadium.

"Billy was pulling for this kid and I have no reason why." Chris said watching Billy talk to his son.

"Maybe the Bakers should worry about they're own kids, seems like they can't control them." Pauline said and Chris nodded in agreement, "Let's go, the boys should be about done."

"I'll meet you guys at the car." CJ said and her parents agreed. CJ waited a moment and then walked over to where Jordan was. He was the only football player left on the field, "You do that to every new player?"

Jordan looked over at the Jackson girl and shrugged, "You don't get it."

"Oh I don't?" CJ questioned and walked over to Jordan, "Cause it looks like. . . you're being a huge dick."

Jordan sighed and set his helmet down on the bench, "You don't see the way he looks at Spencer. Like. . .he's the son he's always wanted."

"J, you know that's not true." CJ said using the nickname she had given him. Jordan couldn't help the butterflies that arose in his stomach when she said that, "Look where you are at, right now. Beverly Hills High School. Where do you live? In the Hills. What car do you drive? A 2019 camaro convertible. What does Spencer have?"

"I know. . ." Jordan says hanging his head in shame, "You're right."

"Your dad is trying to give a kid a chance. Your dad was much like Spencer, growing up in Crenshaw and someone gave him a chance. He is doing that to Spencer. You don't get it, because you have always had that chance."

"When did you get like this?" Jordan said looking at the girl.

"Like what?" CJ asked.

"Reasonable." Jordan simply said.

"I spent 90 days in a detention center. I was lucky, someone gave me a chance. If someone who's dad wasn't a retired football player and who's mother wasn't a editor for vogue who couldn't hire the best attorney in their county did the same thing I did. . . they would've gotten jail time instead of 90 days in juvie." CJ answered.

"Why didn't you take the plea? Why didn't you want a defense?" Jordan asked her but CJ just turned her head, "Why did you even take the blame anyway?"

CJ sighed and looked in Jordan's brown eyes, "You know why."

"But do I really? CJ, you wouldn't have been sent to-"

"Jordan." The two teens looked over to where the call came from. Laura Baker stood off the side, her arms folded in front of her. CJ took a step back from Jordan and looked down at her feet. She could feel the hate radiating off of Laura Baker. If looks could kill, CJ would be dead by now, "Why don't you go hit the showers. Now."

Jordan nodded and grabbed his helmet before walking off the field. CJ watched him leave and turned on her heel to head to her parents' car. Laura stepped in front of CJ, cutting off her path and looked down at the teen.

"What are you doing here? Do you needed reminded about the terms of your parole, Miss Jackson?" Laura asked the teen.

Before CJ spoke her mother spoke for her, "No, she doesn't, Laura. The best thing you can do is stop talking to my daughter before we have another issue on your hands."

Laura looked at the Jacksons before moving out of the way. Pauline led her daughter to the waiting black range rover, and where her husband stood. Chris opened the door for CJ and his wife. CJ looked at Laura one last time before her dad pulled out of the parking lot.

#all american #all american cw #all american imagine #jordan baker #jordan baker imagine #jordan baker x reader #spencer james #olivia baker #asher adams

[cmagines]

Fell Over and For You

Summary: Following season one episodes (“Broken Mirror,” “What Fresh Hell?,” “Somebody’s Watching,” and “The Fisher King: Part 2”), the BAU’s newest and youngest agents fall in love.

Pairing: Spencer Reid/Reader

Word Count: 2,379

           You literally ran into him. You smacked right into his chest and fell against the wall, which was luckily right there to break your fall. It was your fault, really; you’d had your nose so far into a Harry Potter book that you wouldn’t have seen a mob with pitchforks and torches stalking your way.

           Your glasses were skewed on your face. You fixed them anxiously. “I- I’m so sorry,” you apologized profusely, blushing heavily with so much heat in your face you were amazed you weren’t on fire. “I’m not usually so clumsy, I swear-“

           The man was tall, but all you saw of his head was his brown hair when he bent down to pick your book up for you. You turned an even brighter color as he looked at the cover. I’ve done it now, you’d thought, mortified. The newest agent’s literary interests are comparable to a twelve-year-old’s. How long would it take to get through the halls?

           Instead of picking on you, he broke into a wide smile and beamed, brushing his hair back behind his ears and looking up to grin. His sweater vest made him look skinny and his lack of a gun made him look unthreatening. He looked more like a student from the college you’d just left than a suited agent prepared to take on killers, so you relaxed slightly. Maybe he wasn’t as rigid in the status quo you assumed existed.

           “I loved this one,” he told you with a big grin, turning it so the cover faced you as he handed it back over. “Let me know when you get to page 286. That one has some important foreshadowing; I hope you notice.” His face flushed, and suddenly he was just as embarrassed as you. “Well, I mean, not that you wouldn’t have on your own; although now that I’ve pointed it out and you know it’s there, it’s not like you’re reading it on your own-“

           “It’s okay,” you interrupted him, smiling nervously. Your heart still beat in your chest. “I’ve read them all at least a dozen times.” Your hands felt clammy and you held your book tightly. The man was cute, and nice, and you already shared an interest.

           You were quiet and soft-spoken. Spencer was… well, not always loud, but he certainly seemed to have trouble shutting up at times! That was okay, though. You were patient, and you liked when someone else would talk with you, even when you weren’t the most engaging partner. Spencer more than made up for your shyness, and you bonded quickly. He was adept at reading when you were having a particular bout of timidity and was always happy to help you out, whether it meant relaying a message to someone from the local department for you or asking what he assumed you were questioning.

           Elle and Derek took the two of you to restaurant to celebrate the successful capture of an unsub who’d been tormenting two twin sisters, going as far as to capture one and attack Derek to get to the other. Derek kept rubbing his chest where he’d been hit with a taser, but he insisted he was okay.

           Your handsome waiter came back over after you’d finished up your entrees. He looked like he could’ve stepped right out of a men’s health magazine. The shirt he wore was tucked into his pants, but pulled so tight to his body that you could see the defined tones of his abdomen. When he came over to ask for dessert, he took the orders from Elle and Derek, and when he looked to your side of the table, he winked.

           “And for you, gorgeous?” He flirted. He wasn’t lewd, but you’d become the center of attention, just like that, even from the people at the table across from you, who started to giggle at your deer-in-headlights expression.

           Spencer had come to your rescue. “She’d like the crème silk pie,” he said politely, setting his hand down near yours on the table. You quickly moved yours to hover over his and looked like you were holding his hand, staring down at the table in front of you and waiting for the waiter to go away. “And a refill of water,” Spencer added for himself as an afterthought.

           A little girl was kidnapped and your leads of finding her looked like they were all going nowhere. You’d broken into the suspect’s house, and couldn’t find her. Where were you supposed to look next? Everyone else had checked out with firm alibis, and the one person who didn’t had been excluded by the profile.

           You went and stood on the porch, wrapped your arms around yourself, and shivered. When you’d been recruited, the pitch had been that you’d work to bring justice for the families of victims, save lives and rescue the next victims – ‘when you stop a killer, you save their next victim.’ It had sounded nice, until now you were facing down a bleak prospect of telling a heartbroken mother and a father slowly falling to cancer that their daughter was nowhere to be found. You couldn’t even imagine how terrified the little soccer player must have been, if she was even still alive.

           “Are you okay?” Spencer’s voice made you look up. He stepped over the threshold and into the open air with you, hands in his pockets. He looked like the shy one for once, worried about approaching.

           You contemplated nodding. You had to be able to do the job. Everyone else seemed like they could handle it, even Hotch, who had his own child and could relate to the family more than you could. Then again, you’d known Spencer for six months and not once had he ever invalidated your feelings or treated you like he expected you to be tough. He had shown you his sensitive side the month before, confiding in you that he’d been having trouble sleeping from nightmares.

           You shook your head and covered your mouth before you could start crying. Spencer frowned, shuffling his feet, unsure what to do.

           “This always happens,” he told you quietly, looking up and scanning down the street of the residential neighborhood. “Something like this, I mean. We always do our best, but sometimes… we just can’t.” His voice broke. “But we won’t give up until we find who took her, even if we have to stay and work on our own time.”

           That was when you heard the most beautiful sound you thought you had ever bore witness to. “I’ve got her!” Gideon shouted from inside the house. “Hotch, she’s alive!”

           “A group of employees in a hospital in Las Vegas were actually fired because they had a betting pool on when certain patients with terminal illnesses would die,” Spencer told Elle, who listened intently, nodding her head. You suspected she was thinking about something else and just indulging him. “That was in 1981, but since then-“

           “1980,” you corrected quietly, and then froze.

           Elle, Spencer, and Hotch all turned to look at you.

           For a second, you couldn’t breathe. “I – I’m sorry,” you stammered, trying to look at Spencer’s eyes but unable to make contact. You flushed and looked down, feeling your stomach twist. “I shouldn’t’ve interrupted…”

           “It’s okay,” Spencer promised. You chanced a peek back up. He was beaming at you proudly. “You’re absolutely right, Y/N. I was distracted.”

           “By what?” Elle snorted, not believing that the boy genius was distracted by anything when it came to his trivia.

           “It’s possible,” he said defensively, sending her a betrayed look. “And I’m not the only traditionally-labeled genius on the team anymore.” The smile he sent you was encouraging and warm, and you looked down with a slight smile.

           You realized you liked Spencer when you saw the magazine cover that was printed the morning after you closed a case in Hollywood. It was of Spencer swimming in a pool with Lila Archer, a gorgeous, up-and-coming TV actress. He was holding his head up away from hers, while she tugged on his tie.

           It was a slow realization that took you a while to come to. After all, Spencer was just your friend, right? Sure, you liked spending time with him, and he helped you out when you were uncomfortable in social situations, and he comforted you when you were upset, but those were all things your best friend had done in college. Except – you’d never wanted to hug your best friend as frequently as you wanted to hug Spencer. You’d never wanted to kiss them before. It was just the scarily clever doctor whom made you want that romantic companionship. You’d fallen, and it was possibly you’d been falling since you bumped into him and fell into the wall.

           You showed him the magazine before you got on the jet to go back to Quantico, smirking shyly behind the safety of the paper. “You made a friend,” you said, disguising your subtle question behind an observation.

           For once, you weren’t the one turning scarlet. Spencer took the magazine from you with wide eyes and stared at the cover, cheeks going all rosy. “She wanted to kiss me,” he explained, justifying why he was in her backyard pool with all of his clothes on, gun holster included. “She dragged me into the pool and-“

           “Why didn’t you kiss her?” You couldn’t help your curiosity, although you thought you might have blown your secret.

           Spencer paused, tilted his head, and frowned thoughtfully down at the high-definition photograph. “I guess I had someone else on my mind,” he admitted to you, his voice small and quiet. You bit your lip and nodded, taking the diversion of Derek calling for you to hurry up.

           So Spencer liked someone. That was… it was fine. He was a coworker, and it was a crush. You would get over it.

           Except you didn’t get over it, and a few months later, after Rebecca Bryant had been rescued from her insane and apparently suicidal father, you stayed late to finish up your statements on the case so you could sleep in the next morning. You were getting ready to leave when you noticed the light in the kitchenette turning on. Investigative, you crept over to see who was in at the late hour.

           “Spence,” you said quietly. He jumped skittishly and “accidentally” dumped some more sugar into his coffee. “What are you doing here? You should be with your mom.”

           His mother had come to the FBI to help, and that was how you’d met her, offering to help the woman who looked lost without realizing that she was your best friend’s mother. Spencer had taken you aside and carefully explained to you with a frightened expression that his mom was schizophrenic. You’d smiled sadly at him and said that you were there for him if he ever needed help, or even just to talk, and then had kindly excused yourself to let him talk to his parent.

           Spencer turned around to lean back against the counter, leaving his coffee mug on the table. “She’s at the hotel,” he said, matching your low volume. You felt a little bit of a thrill, like you were being secretive by being so quiet. “I wanted… I wanted to see if you were still in.”

           Sympathetically, you smiled at him and held your hands behind your back unobtrusively. “I’m here. What do you need?”

           Spencer held his arms out, sucking on his lower lip. He was nervous and tentative. He wasn’t a very touchy person, so you knew it was special… you reached out for his waist, putting your hands on his sides, and slid your hands around to your back as he leaned over, tugging you to his slim form and holding you carefully, like you would change your mind and scamper away if he was too firm.

           “This always happens,” you told him softly, standing on your toes to rest your chin gingerly on his shoulder. His hair tickled your nose. You breathed in his shampoo and soap and shut your eyes, feeling him shaking slightly in your arms. “Something like this, I mean. We always do our best, but sometimes… we just can’t.”

           Spencer stilled as he recognized the words you were reciting to him.

           “But we won’t give up until we find who took her, even if we have to stay and work on our own time. … This time we don’t have to. We already found her. Her father chose to end his own life, but we saved her. This was a victory, Spence.”

           He sniffled. “I told you that.”

           “Yeah.”

           “You know… the reason I didn’t want to kiss Lila…”

           “The girl you have a thing for?” You asked, disappointed that the conversation was going back to the mystery girl you were definitely jealous of. Still, you couldn’t be too upset. He’d come back to you while he was upset, instead of going to her. That had to mean something.

           Spencer nodded against you while you embraced, his cheek rubbing against yours. “I want to tell her how I feel,” he whispered nervously, his long fingers dancing nervously as he loosely held onto the back of your shirt.

           “So tell her,” you gently urged, putting him before yourself. You were a genius, sure. According to every IQ measurement test you’d ever taken, at least. The one thing you weren’t able to do, though… the one problem you weren’t able to solve… was to tell him how you felt.

           Spencer pulled back from you. You sank back onto your feet and looked up at him tiredly. There were dark shadows under his eyes, just like there were under yours. He held your waist in his hands, reluctant to let go, and leaned down. You held your breath, internally panicking, as he closed the distance and touched his forehead to yours, the warm heat of his breath rushing gently over your face.

           “I am,” he answered, just as carefully.

           For once in your life, you did the bold thing and confronted your shyness head-on, reaching up to the back of his neck and pulling him down to kiss his lips, feeling the last year of friendship finally come to full fruition.

~~~

~~~

A/N: Welcome! This is my new side blog dedicated to Criminal Minds fanfic. This is a repost from my main blog because I want to show that I write pretty well. If you want to commission specific content, please consider buying me a low-priced Ko-Fi.

#cmagines #oneshot #plot-based #hotch #hotchner #daughter reader #reader #reader insert #spencer reid #reid x reader #spencer x reader #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #cm #cm x reader #criminal minds x reader #fic

[obliteratethefrog]

Pregnant Headcanon

-getting pregnant and your ex bf leaving you, so you have the boys(+lucy, bri, and rog) help you through your pregnancy.

A/N: I’ve seen so many people do “getting pregnant by this cast member and that) but like...what if they didn’t impregnate you and you were just their friend you were helping through a pregnancy? So here it is, enjoy!

 TAGS: @darlingyourebeingabore @vuhlereea @wearethechampionsblog

@ursoself-satisfying

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Positive.

-That’s what the little stick read, right in front of your own eyes. Positive!

-You were ecstatic! You’ve always wanted to be a mom, and now’s your chance.

-When your BF got home that night, you told him over dinner. His whole demeanor dropped right then and there.

-He broke up with you not even a minute later, saying, “I’m not ready to be a dad! I knew I should’ve used a condom the last time we had sex.”

-He packed up his bags and left right then and there.

-You were an emotional wreck after that, calling Rami to tell him the news while sobbing hysterically, asking if he could come to your house.

-Rami was out with the guys(Joe, Gwil, and Ben), but he told them the situation, and all of them decided that they were going to go and comfort you.

-When they arrived, each one of them brought you into a hug.

-Rami held you tight, Joe rubbed your shoulders as he hugged you, Gwil ran his hand through your hair while whispering sweet words, and Ben let you sit in his lap as you all sat in your living room of your apartment.

-You told them that they didn’t have to come, and that you were sorry for disturbing their night before filming, but Rami shushed you and said you were more important at the moment.

-They let you come to the filming set with them throughout your pregnancy.

-The first month was hell.

-Your breasts were super tender, you couldn’t leave the bathroom floor if you tried, you were always tired, your moods were off the wall, and so were your cravings. The boys brought you whatever you wanted when they had a chance to get away from set, but usually it was their assistant that was helping the most.

-You mostly camped out in Rami’s trailer while they were filming, and even Lucy was helping you through the more extreme portions (aka helping you take off your bra when your tits felt like they were being rubbed raw, holding your hair back as your puked, or even bringing a hot water bottle for when you got cramps.)

-5 months into production and also into your pregnancy, and the boys couldn’t help but be excited for the due date that was slowly, but surely approach.

-Even Brian and Roger were excited. Roger would always sit beside you when the boys were filming, as well as Brian. (hell they even gave you your own chair with your damn name on it!)

-Uncle Bri would bring a ukulele and play soft tunes close to your belly while humming lyrics to Queen songs (usually ‘39, Under Pressure, and Radio GaGa).

-Uncle Rog would always ask if he could warm his chilled hands on your belly, and when he did, he would feel your baby start to kick around at the familiar hands. He would smile like a kid in a candy store, reminiscing over each one of his children and how he felt when he did this in his youth.

-Rami would come over in full costume, hair, and makeup just to make sure you were comfortable. When the director would give them a 5 minute break, he’d come over and rub circles along your stomach, reassuring you of any insecurities you had throughout your pregnancy.

“Rami, I’m about the size of a whale, I can’t even see my feet!” “Don’t say that, (Y/N). You still look beautiful. Now c’mon, show me that smile.”

-Usually when he’d say this he’d start to tickle you furiously, but today he just rubbed circles along your bloated belly, causing a giant grin to span over your face.

-Joe would let you mess around with each one of the multiple hair styles he had throughout the movies, whether it be the long ass wig he had to wear or the curly perm he “hated”.

“I think you should keep your hair like this, it looks great!” “You’re just saying that because you like messing with the curls.” “You’re not wrong..”

-Gwilym would always come over to lay his head on your stomach, with you permission of course! He loved feeling your baby move around and kick at his cheek. It somehow always made him relax enough to get back into the mood to finish filming.

“(Y/N)! I felt the baby kick my cheek again! It was a good kick at that, do you think the baby would be a football(soccer) player?” “Maybe Gwil, maybe.”

-Ben wouldn’t really want to interact with the baby at the beginning, but about halfway through filming, he wouldn’t leave your side, making sure you weren’t in any pain or anything.

“Ben. BEN! I’m fine, really I am.” “I know you are, (Y/N), but I just wanna make sure. Do you want a shoulder massage?” “Actually...yes, I’d love one.”

-Being treated like a porcelain doll by the entire cast of BoRhap. Allen would always bring you a big bottle of water from the nearest convenience store or gas station he could find.

“Here you are, (Y/N), dear. Oh, and I brought you a snack” he would say, holding out your favorite bag of chips. He had noticed that usually right whenever you got to set that you would be craving these chips. “Thanks, Allen. That’s really sweet of you!”

-Aaron would always let you cuddle up to him when it was cold during the later shoots. His plush body always made your baby calm down.

“Ah, I felt the little bugger kick my stomach a bit, (Y/N).” “You’ve gotten the baby excited then. They love having you close, you’re warm and familiar.”

-9 months later and here you were, sitting in the hospital. Earlier that day, on set, you thought you were just having excruciating cramps, but oh nnnoononon, this baby was coming, and I mean NOW.

-You waddled your way over to Lucy, who immediately notices the pool of liquid that trailed behind you. She raced away to get the others, who rushed out of the makeup trailer, still in costume, before ushering you into Joe’s car.

-Thank God Joe’s from New York, and he knew his way around traffic.

-You were rushed in a wheelchair by a group of nurses, who immediately took you into a room that you had reserved earlier that month.(upon Rami’s request of course. He knew you wouldn’t want to be rushed off to the hospital with no room to stay in)

-Labor was a bitch. The nurse gave you your epidural shot about 3 hours before you were meant to begin pushing, but this baby was being really stubborn.

-Joe was kind enough to bring you a cup of water when you had just finished a really bad contraction.

-When the actually pushing came, they only allowed one person in the room, which obviously was Rami.

-He didn’t even complain when you gripped his hand with as much strength as an anaconda (me:*plays the nicki minaj song* lol sorry)

-30 minutes into pushing and you were greeted by the cries of your baby.

-IT’S A BOY!!

-Rami stared at the newborn that was resting on your chest after he was cleaned and taken care of.

“So, what’re you gonna name him?” “I think I’m gonna name him...Micah Fletcher (L/N).”

-Uncle Gwil, Joe, and Ben couldn’t keep their greedy little hands off of baby Micah.

-Uncle Bri and Uncle Roger swung by later, and they already had little toys and clothes for when you could take him home.

-You remember posting a video of all the boys holding Micah.

-Gwil was sitting at the edge of the bed, letting the baby boy grip onto his finger.

“He’s got such a strong grip, (Y/N). That’s good.”

-Joe couldn’t help but copy Micah’s actions. If he yawned with his tongue sticking out then joe would follow, smiling wide when Micah smiled back at him.

“Ah, he’s about to do it again...ahhhhhhhh hahah hey there..oh (Y/N) he’s got your nose and eyes!”

-Ben would let the sleepy Micah cuddled up to his buff chest(me:dem titties...oops sorry tumblr). Micah would rest his head on the middle of his chest while looking around the room with curious (e/c) eyes.

“You better try not to feed off me, I’m not your mum..” “BEN! HAHA”

-Rami was obviously given the honor of being his godfather, and he couldn’t have been happier. He already loved Micah like he was his own son.

“I’m fine, (Y/N). No, I am not crying..okay I am a little bit..but I mean you just made me his godfather and that makes me so happy..” “C’mere Rami, give me a hug.”

-Brian sits in the rocking chair in the room to get Micah to sleep when you were recovering. He could let Micah play with a few strands of his gray curls.

“No, No Micah, that doesn’t go in your mouth...awe now don’t give me that look. I said no; I don’t want (Y/N) griping about how you’re obsessed with putting hair in your mouth when you’re older.”

-Roger would fall asleep with Micah in his secure grip. He would be snoring away until Micah wakes up and takes a whole handful of his beard and tugs.

“Oi, squirt! Don’t tug on that, I’m already losing hair on me head!”

-THE CAST CAN’T STOP SPOILING YOU AND MICAH. Whether it be a pair of house slippers you’ve been eyeing or some new blanket for Micah.

-We all know Brian’s gonna be the one to decorate his nursery like a damn planetarium and you love it.

#bohemian rhapsody x reader #headcanon #okay this made me tear up a lot #joe mazzello #rami malek #ben hardy #gwilym lee #brian may #roger taylor #this snatched my wig and took all my uwus

[inazumine]

Sameness in Difference: EnKi Things

Okay, so like, hear me out for a second.

There’s one pairing in Inazuma Eleven that I think codifies the “enemy turned rival turned friend” dynamic, and was the first in the series to do so. From the start, these two have been defined by their similarities despite coming from vastly different worlds, and are equals that understand each other in a way no one else quite does, and grow to support each other on every front. That pairing, is EnKi (Endou x Kidou)

(WARNING: Another long ass post, even longer than the first one and straight trash.)

To begin an analysis of EnKi worth its salt, I feel as though we have to first understand who Kidou is, and the context through which he operates in the beginning of the series before the Teikoku v. Raimon match, then compare it to who Kidou becomes by the end of the series. Endou fundamentally changes Kidou’s world view and helps him reconcile the divide between his role as a soccer player and his feelings as a person.

Kidou begins the series as “Teikoku’s Commander” and “Kageyama’s Protégé”, our first taste of the level of soccer that Inazuma puts on full display, and a demonstration of the level of cruelty that can come out of the sport. Kidou only explicitly says it far later in season 3, but as viewers we see that his origin as a soccer player, at least through his eyes, begins with Kageyama and his teachings, and that’s something he struggles to separate himself from as the series continues. Kidou and Kageyama both see Kidou as someone who stands above others, with other weaker schools and even his Teikoku teammates on a level below him to be subjugated. Until a certain point, that worldview was never called in to question. That is, until the first game with Raimon.

God Hand shocked everyone on the field and in the audience, but it was Endou’s determination that broke expectations, and that’s what Kidou latched on to in his interest. It’s Endou’s tenacity and simple mindedness that breaks Kidou’s calculated expectations. Just the way Endou interacts with Kidou, with pure enthusiasm as an equal without formalities and without restraint, is why Kidou’s barriers start to come down and he starts calling the role of ”Kageyama’s Protégé” in to question: Rather than the Commander’s soccer, what is Kidou Yuuto’s soccer? Kidou is constantly in Kageyama’s shadow, and it’s Endou that starts to pull him out of it.

Initially, Kidou and Endou looked like completely opposite sides of the spectrum, but once Kidou starts to shed some of Kageyama’s influence, he returns to Kidou Yuuto’s values. Like Endou, Kidou loves to be challenged and he wants to play soccer giving everything he has on an equal playing field, because soccer is now again something fun, and not just something to win and dominate. And Endou knows this, he knows that despite how Kidou initially seemed, that Kidou is more than Kageyama’s copy and has his own way of doing things. Outside of Teikoku, Endou is the first person to truly trust in Kidou for what he is past “Teikoku’s Commander” and “Kageyama’s Protégé”.

After Teikoku’s defeat, Kidou seems to develop a strong amount of trust in Endou as a rival, and then as a friend. Kidou seems to continuously marvel at how Endou is able to answer to Kidou’s worldview with his simplicity, and after a while it’s something he’s able to confide in.

(Okay sidebar gonna talk about episode 17 now it’s liKE MY FAVORITE ONE IN THE WHOLE SHOW)

In episode 17, Kidou really puts on full display how much Endou affects him. I don’t know how many people have actually visited Kidou’s home, something’s telling me not many if any, and it’s telling that Kidou invites Endou on the spot without even having known him for what at that point must’ve been a few weeks maybe? He also divulges his family situation, which he says he explicitly hasn’t told anyone before. When Endou says that Kidou and he are the same, it’s a big moment because until that point Kidou had acknowledged that distance between himself and others, and had started to envy Endou and his soccer where there is no concept of it, just pure hearted feelings for the fun of the game. It brings Kidou to a point where he can start to engage with the world differently, and as he says later, begin looking for the soccer that fit him over the one Kageyama prescribed all this time. Endou continuously ignores the distance that Kidou seems to have put between himself, his soccer, and other people, and strips him of anything that isn’t explicitly Kidou Yuuto.  

Gouenji goes on to tell Kidou that he’s only ever looked at Endou from the front, which means as an enemy but also has the implied meaning of “at a distance”, and asks him to let Endou look after his back. Letting him look after his back means so much, because it means not just joining the team, but Kidou learning to let his walls down and be looked after. You can clearly see Teikoku is supportive and works together as a well-oiled unit, but at Raimon there’s an emphasis on covering for each other’s weaknesses, and it’s Kidou admitting to himself that he has weaknesses that’s a big step in learning how to play alongside others, and not just in front of them. Endou is a captain but he’s also a friend, and that’s what Kidou needs.

(LMAO Gouenji stop trying to be cool)

Fast forward a bit to season 2 where Endou and Raimon are up against a threat they can’t even conceive of. They’re getting battered and beat up left and right, teammates are starting to break down and leave, and Endou is beginning to grow weary and question himself and his decisions. Yet still, there’s one person who continues to hold fast and completely trust in him and his world view, who stays until the end and beyond and never once stops supporting Endou and his vision, and it’s not even Endou himself, it’s Kidou.

Throughout season 2, we see Kidou continue to change in this same way, where he stops distancing himself from others and grows closer to Endou and Raimon as a whole. There’s more moments of Kidou goofing off with everyone, loosening up and being dorky, and just smiling and acting like, y’know he’s 14 and not 30. Here more than ever is where Kidou and Endou truly seem like close friends and equals, when Endou starts getting down on himself and can’t really find anyone else to talk to, especially about Gouenji’s departure.

I really wish we saw more of Kidou and Teikoku interacting, especially him and Sakuma/Genda so I could have a little more to go off when trying to analyze how Kidou is with them vs how Kidou is with Raimon, but for now I can say I think it’s because it’s Endou that Kidou doesn’t have to posture or act like a commander, and this is even supported by Sakuma during the training for Death Zone 2: “You’re more yourself at Raimon.”

(He’s looking at Endou oh god WHAT A SOFT SMILE)

Speaking of Teikoku, we all remember the nightmare that was Shin Teikoku in season 2. At this point in the series, Kidou’s been removed from Kageyama and is given space to breathe, but it hasn’t even been close to long enough for the trauma to subside, which is why seeing Fudou, Sakuma, and Genda like this is such a big hit to his psyche.

Kageyama seeks control, and his obsession with Kidou leads him to hurting his friends as collateral damage, because people like Sakuma and Genda are expendable if it means getting Kidou to realize where he belongs. This is straight up emotional abuse and midst Kidou trying to fight against Kageyama’s grip, he in turn loses control of himself and is caught between trying to protect his friends from destroying their futures, win the game for Raimon’s sake, and beat Kageyama for his own sanity to reaffirm why he walked away in the first place. Alas, things don’t end cleanly, and Kidou is forced to push it all aside for the sake of beating Aliea… until season 3.

Season 3 is truly a test of Kidou’s and Endou’s mental strength, and moving forward to be better leaders for Inazuma Japan, and this is where we really see how parallel Endou and Kidou’s stories become. Endou has to deal with growing out of his his grandfather’s shadow, and Kidou has to deal with growing out of Kageyama’s shadow, seeing if Endou Daisuke’s grandson and Kageyama’s protégé live up to and can progress past their legacies.

Kidou thinks Kageyama is well and gone by this point, and even still just the thought of Fudou being a national team member sends Kidou back in to questioning if he’ll ever really be free of Kageyama and all the progress he’d thought he’d made in spite of his origins as Kageyama’s protégé. It only gets worse as we see that Kageyama is still alive and influencing the events of the FFI to get rid of Inazuma Japan and control soccer for good. Kidou plunges back right in to Kageyama’s clutches and goes forward futilely struggling against him with no direction, forgetting about how much of himself he’s become since he broke away from Kageyama all those months ago.

For Endou, if his reason was to take down Kageyama for his grandfather’s suffering, it would be understandable, but it isn’t. He knows how Kidou is struggling and what Kageyama does to him, and he wants to be there for him more than anything else. Endou moved past Kageyama’s hold over him way back in season 1, and whereas Endou is able to move on and focus on playing his soccer that lies ahead, Kidou is stuck in his past. It takes a kick in the face (metaphorically) from Fudou for Kidou to realize this, and it’s none other than Endou who’s literally next to him for Kidou to finally get the push he needs to reject Kageyama’s influence over him for good. It’s Endou’s influence that has pushed Kidou forward all this time, and he wants to keep going that way, with Endou and Inazuma Japan right next to him helping him walk his own path. Endou helps pull Kidou away from his past and focus on the present, what he can do for now over contemplating what he couldn’t do because of yesterday.

As always, I have to state that this isn’t a one-sided ship. Like I said earlier, Kidou is the first and longest-lasting rival (in terms of episodes anyway) that Endou has in the series, and Endou returns that trust and confidence in Kidou almost immediately and ten times over. Endou sees Kidou as a close friend that has stayed beside him since the beginning, and is beyond grateful for his support in leading Raimon and Inazuma Japan, especially in season 3. He may not be able to wax poetic like Kidou can, but there have been more than enough occasions where Endou has gone starry-eyed over how cool Kidou is, or explodes at the thought that Kidou is anything less than amazing.

(I’M NOT CRYING, YOU ARE)

As captains Endou and Kidou share a bond that not many in the series can lay claim to, and they understand each other in so many ways even though they have almost completely opposite personalities and upbringings. Both Endou and Kidou know the burden of being a captain, and Kidou knows exactly when Endou’s frustrated or troubled, and often for what reason (ie. Before and after the Kidokawa match, Aphrodi’s sudden visit, during like the entire second season.)

Kidou plays a support role to Endou’s captainship, being the brains behind Raimon’s success, and laying out plans of attack to supplement Endou’s motivational role. For someone like Kidou, who’s been so used to leading his entire life, I can’t imagine that wasn’t hard to get used to, but he does it wholeheartedly because he trusts Endou and is there to back him up, not usurp him. Endou in turn knows most intimately about what kind of things Kidou struggles with, and fights him whenever he starts to get self-deprecating because, in his words, Kidou is amazing. He sticks to Kidou’s side when he needs him and does his best as one of his closest friends.

For Endou, Kidou has been a friend and an amazing guy since the beginning, something that never changes, and for Kidou, Endou goes from Raimon’s idiot captain to his best friend, and his captain that he’ll follow no matter what.

That’s because he’s Endou Mamoru!

I think the best thing about EnKi is just how much Kidou adores Endou and how much he tries to be his support after he joins Raimon. I mean, Kidou legit says the sweetest things, like how “pure-hearted and straightforward” Endou is, and you can see how much he explicitly trusts Endou, not just his skills, but that because it’s Endou he’ll do everything in his power to help his friends and win with them all. There’s so many times where Endou’s capability and prowess as a goalkeeper and a captain get called in to question, especially in the second season where Endou goes through some of the toughest times in the series, and Kidou will usually be the first person to be like “nope, you’re wrong” and state his unwavering confidence in Endou. It’s almost like Endou’s modified Kidou’s internal logic: Endou’s drive and optimism have broken down Kidou’s calculated expectations so many times that as soon as you introduce Endou in to the equation, Kidou’s like “ah, of course” and knows Endou will move them toward the best case scenario.

(HE’S SMITTEN, LOOKING AT THE SUN)

ANYWAY, I think this has gotten long enough. Tl;dr, Endou and Kidou are almost two sides of the same coin even if they don’t seem like it in the very beginning. Endou and Kidou both think the other is the best thing since sliced bread, and they help and support each other through being captain’s and trying to handle more stress than I feel like middle schooler’s should ever have to. They mirror each other in a lot of ways, and through their differences make up for where the other can’t to help themselves and their teams move forward, going from enemies to best friends. 

As always, whether or not you ship them romantically or platonically or none at all, I feel like their relationship is important and I hope you guys do too! 

#Inazuma Eleven #ie11 #enki #endou mamoru #kidou yuuto #oh shit here we go #have you ever just written 2000 words and you're like #wow i've said absolutely nothing oh joy #i started this MONTHS AGO #and college got in the way and screwed up my post schedule #This should've been posted on 1/14 #*cries* #anyway I'm sorry for this and everything #ugh i hope you guys don't hate my thoughts I just had to get them out

[morningfears]

Dear Stranger

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Sort of inspired by The Perks of Being A Wallflower? Basically, reader and Calum have a sort of relationship. Things don’t work out. She writes a letter to get explain her feelings. (This isn’t connected to my Letters AU! That’s a separate thing and it’s going to be for Shawn. I just felt like doing this one.)

Word Count: 2.2k

*Note: This is written a little differently. So, let me know what you think?

Dear Stranger,

If I’m being honest, I don’t know why I’m writing this letter. I don’t think that anyone will read this but the thought that someone could makes me anxious. Even though you don’t know me, I’m writing this letter to release some of my deepest thoughts and that vulnerability terrifies me. But I guess that fear of vulnerability is why I’m in this situation in the first place.

I won’t bore you with every single detail, hypothetical reader. I’ll just give you enough information to understand why I feel the way that I do (which is like shit, in case you were wondering). I need you to know two things before you continue reading, though: I never meant for things to turn out this way and I do, truly and with every fiber of my being, love Calum. Even if, throughout this letter, you doubt everything else I say, don’t doubt that.

Calum and I met our freshman year of college. We were in the same group for orientation and got stuck being buddies for the weird camp experience they made us go through. I’m not sure if you’ve ever been to a college orientation or if yours was anything like that, just know that it was the worst and none of us wanted to be there. Anyway, we were in the middle of the woods for hours and we got stuck on a zip-line platform because the kid before us got stuck in the middle and we were already clipped in and couldn’t move.

Calum was quiet, I was shy. We said, maybe, five words to one another the entire experience. But I had a massive crush on him immediately. He didn’t say much but he stood close to me on the platform (after overhearing that I was terrified of heights) and made sure that I was alright when we got to the other side. He didn’t really ask, he just kind of guided me to the table his friends (the ones he knew from high school) were sitting at during dinner and had me sit beside him.

His friends made me feel welcome, they included me in the conversation (even if I didn’t really have much to contribute other than a nod or a laugh), and they became my first friends in college.

I expected the relationship to taper off over the course of the semester but Calum and I grew closer and closer. We started talking to one another and, let me tell you. The moment he opened his mouth, my crush grew exponentially. Calum is the funniest, sweetest, most intelligent person I’ve ever met. We can talk about any topic there is and it’s the best conversation I’ve ever had. Calum plays bass and, although I’m musically challenged, I could listen to him talk about bass lines for hours because he’s so passionate and makes it sound so interesting.

Over winter break, we kept in touch and even sent one another gifts (I got him custom guitar picks, he got me a record I’d been looking for for ages). But there was always that fear in the back of my mind. I was always afraid that Calum would find someone better, someone more fun to hang out with. I was always afraid that I wasn’t enough for anyone (but, most importantly, him).

And I think that fear of not being good enough made me hold myself back. It made me hide parts of myself from him, made me keep my heart guarded. I figured that if I didn’t let him in, it wouldn’t hurt so bad when he left.

For a while, that was okay. Calum knew that I was shy and that I didn’t open up easily. But he kept chipping away at my walls and I felt my resolve crumbling more and more each day. He was managing to do something no one else had ever done; he was managing to make himself at home in my heart.

Sophomore year, nothing interesting happened between Calum and I. I got involved in philanthropy and those stereotypical college activism groups, Calum walked on to the university’s soccer team and quickly became the best player we had. We were both busy but we made time for one another.

I moved off campus that year and we cooked dinner together once a month. We watched movies sometimes, texted as often as possible, but face-to-face interaction was nearly impossible.

Somehow, though, we made it through.

Junior year is where things start getting complicated. Calum started dating this girl, Anna. She was nice, I guess. I always got the feeling that she didn’t like me but I never wanted to be that person, you know? I didn’t want to think that she was jealous of our friendship or that she felt threatened by me. Because, honestly, what was threatening about me? Calum never looked at me that way (or, at least, I didn’t think he did).

Calum and I stopped seeing each other as often as we had before. He spent his weekends with her, I spent mine with my textbooks. It sucked, suddenly going from having someone to hang out with and call on to being alone, but I managed. As long as he was happy, that was all that mattered.

Junior year is also when I realized that I was in love with Calum. 

I always thought that my crush was based on the fact that he was one of the first guys to pay attention to me. But the longer he was out of my life, the more I missed him. I missed his conversations and his jokes. I missed listening to him play bass at three in the morning over FaceTime when neither of us could sleep. I missed seeing him struggle to hold back a smile when I told a stupid joke. I missed calling him just because I wanted to hear his voice.

And when I really reflected on all of  those feelings of longing and loneliness, I came to the conclusion that I was in love with Calum.

It was a blow to the stomach, really, realizing that I was in love with someone who would never love me back. And, stupidly, I thought that the best way to get over my feelings was to just let him go. He was already blowing me (and most of his other friends!) off to hang out with Anna. So, I decided that enough was enough and let him go.

I started hanging out with new friends, friends that he didn’t know, and I even spent my breaks with them. Calum fell out of my life completely and it was the hardest thing that I’ve ever gone through. I would catch myself staring at old pictures, smiling at my phone in the middle of the night. Or I would open up our old message thread and type up a message when I got good news before I remembered and deleted it.

But the hardest part of it all was that he didn’t even try to keep me around. He didn’t try to chase me.

I didn’t expect him to. I was just a friend, after all. But it still hurt, you know?

Anyway, the summer between senior year and junior year is where shit really hit the fan. (Also, sorry if you’re offended by swearing. I never know if it’s cool to do or not.)

Calum and Anna broke up just before everyone went home for summer. She had a guy back home that was waiting for her and she wanted to be with him, not have a long distance relationship with Calum. I only know this because Calum showed up at my apartment (I stayed in town for my internship), drunk off his ass.

As his only friend left in town, I became his therapist. He spent the night on my couch, telling me everything. We shared a bottle of Jack.

From there, it was a slippery slope. I want to believe that Calum kissed me first but, honestly, I don’t think I’ll ever know. We were both drunk, he was out of his mind with heartbreak and I was the first person he saw. It could’ve been anyone that he hooked up with that night.

But it wasn’t.

And the next morning, we woke up to the sun pouring into my living room, both of us naked and hungover. We didn’t talk about it. Just pretended it hadn’t happened and he left.

We didn’t talk much after that but the sex continued.

He would come over, we would get drunk, we would sleep together. Sometimes we woke up together; others, he was gone before I even thought about opening my eyes.

His heart was on the mend but mine was breaking all over again.

The summer went by way too quickly. Between the thirty hours I was working each week for my internship, the twenty five at the diner, and the off time I was spending with Calum, I don’t know how I didn’t have a mental breakdown. But by the time August rolled around, I was exhausted.

Senior year passed in a blur. Calum and I kept up our relationship (if that’s what you want to call it) but I think he could tell that it was taking a toll on me because one morning, right before our winter finals, I woke up to find a note instead of him in my bed.

He told me that he was sorry, that he should’ve seen what he was doing to me. He said that he loved me and that he’d never meant to hurt me and I believed him. He also said that he wanted to be friends again.

So, we tried it. After winter break, we went out for coffee for the first time in a long time and it was nice. It was awkward, there was a lot of unspoken tension, but it was nice, just the same. And, honestly, that’s how our friendship was afterwards. Awkward, but nice.

If our friends caught on, they didn’t say anything. They just let us be and I think that’s the best thing they could’ve done. It’s hard enough explaining here. I can’t imagine having to tell any of them.

Now, you may be thinking that we’re friends, the story’s over. But, unfortunately, it’s not. There’s still a little bit left to my story with Calum.

Over the rest of senior year, we were okay. And, until a few weeks ago, I thought we’d graduate and move on with our lives as friends. But at a party, Calum got drunk. He ended up at my apartment and he told me that he loved me. He told me that he’d dated Anna to get over me and that he wanted to actually be with me now.

But I couldn’t believe him.

I wanted to. I desperately wanted to believe that this person I’ve been in love with for nearly four years loves me back but I couldn’t. Every bone in my body was telling me that he was just drunk and that I couldn’t spill my guts to him only to have him reject me when he sobered up.

So, I asked him to leave. 

I lied to him that night. I told him that I didn’t love him in that way, that I never saw us as anything but friends with benefits. I told him that I couldn’t see a relationship with him when he pressed. And the look on his face broke my heart.

Seeing his eyes, that’s when I knew I made a mistake. But the thought of letting him in, letting him break my heart for a third time, made me panic. Those walls that he’d knocked down years ago had already been rebuilt and I couldn’t allow him to see through the cracks.

So, I let him go.

He didn’t walk at graduation. I’m not sure if that was his plan all along or if he didn’t come because of me. I wanted to apologize to him but he’s blocked my number and broke his lease the day of graduation. Our friends have promised to pass on a message to him, have promised to tell him that I’m sorry for lying to him, but I’m not sure that they will. Or if he’ll believe me.

I don’t know if I’ll ever see Calum again and that scares me. I was afraid to have my heart broken again, this time intentionally, but it’s true what they say. It’s better to have loved and lost. I wish I could’ve loved Calum the way I wanted and had him love me back.

I can only imagine it would’ve been a beautiful love.

I’m sorry for rambling, Stranger. And I’m sorry for cluttering your mailbox with this. I’m hoping this will become a dead letter, one that no one will ever read. But, if you do get this, take a chance today. Tell someone you love them. Live without fear.

Be well, Stranger.

Love,

The One with the Broken Heart

Author’s Note: This isn’t the start of my letters series. This is something else entirely. But this is the format the letters will take? They just won’t be this long. I don’t know. I was in my feelings. I wanted to do something different. How do you feel about this? I know it’s in first person and I usually hate that but it’s a letter so. I couldn’t really do it any other way.

#calum hood imagines #calum hood smut #calum hood imagine #calum hood blurbs #calum hood fanfiction #5sos imagine #5sos imagines #5sos smut #5sos fanfiction #5sos fanfic #5sos preference #5 seconds of summer imagine #5 seconds of summer smut #5 seconds of summer preferences #5 seconds of summer preference #5 seconds of summer imagines #5 seconds of summer fanfic #calum hood blurb #5sos blurb #5sos blurbs #5 seconds of summer blurb #5 seconds of summer blurbs #calum hood x reader #calum hood x you #mine