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vaguely-concerned · 2 months

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Ever since watching The Wire for the first time, my brain has doggedly kept working away at the Especially the lies of it all, and specifically at how much the structure beneath the different stories Garak tells contributes to the overall meaning of what he’s trying to say. While the contradicting narratives of course expertly obscure the factual circumstances of his getting exiled, using them also allows him to tell aspects and facets of the emotional truth I don’t think he ever could have, if he’d simply told the actual story of what happened. (It’s very Varric-core of him honestly.)

The first story — the ‘oh, you think you know me?’ story — says I have done things that would sicken you if you knew any detail of it. It’s clearly meant to scare Bashir away so he’ll leave him to die shamefully in peace already lol. But it’s also one of his (probably much-needed lbr) little lessons to Julian that are so frequent in the beginning, given while Garak still has some hold on himself — “Don’t be so quick to forgive me if you don’t even know what I’ve done; what would you do if this really were the sum total of what I am?” (And Julian seems to surprise him by going ‘Well, exactly the same thing, because no matter who you are I am a doctor. But I sort of take your point.’)

The second story — the letting the orphans go story — says I have failed to smother my soul in its cradle when it was required of me, and I regret that more than anything I’ve done. To my ears this is the one most shot through with active self-loathing too, which is interesting. He’s officially lost the control he’s been clinging to and it’s about to get ugly. His TL;DR is ‘Sentiment is the greatest weakness of all’, even all the way back here. (Which is the one lesson Julian steadfastly refuses to learn, which I think in turn does some serious rearrangement of Garak’s soul over the course of the show haha. Get uno reversed into the process of loving and being loved without shame asshole.) This is also where he builds up to admitting to having any sort of need for companionship or closeness at all and — so much worse — that Julian’s role in his life actually has fulfilled some of that need, and he’s DRIPPING with defensive venom over it b/c well I get it Garak vulnerability is scary it can take a person like that.

(I also feel there’s something honest and forbidden in ‘Suddenly the whole exercise seemed utterly meaningless’. I suspect ‘actually… why the fuck are we even doing this???’ is not a welcome sentiment in an Obsidian Order water cooler environment, no matter what you’re saying it about lmao. The very first seeds of him deconstructing the things he’s been taught about Cardassia and his work might be hinted at here, though they of course take a looong time to come to any real fruition.)

The third story — the ‘Elim was my best friend’ story — says hey, remember that thing you said once, about how sometimes, you have to be loyal to yourself before you can be loyal to anything else? Well. guess what. I couldn’t even be that lmao. It also furthers that thread of being divided from yourself, split, that having ‘Elim’ as a separate person around in all versions of the story brings in. He’s in control of himself again, but he essentially hands his life and soul over to Julian to decide what should be done with them.

I’ve done horrible things and it finally caught up with me, I’m getting what I deserve → I let sentiment master me and the fact that I’m too weak to do what’s needed of me shames me more than the evil I’ve done → I fucked up. I betrayed myself and everything I held to, all for nothing, and I have no one to blame for it but myself. But it’s very nice that you’re here anyway, Doctor. (Wow. I didn’t realize quite how isolated and lonely that last one was before right now. The way Tain has shaped him really has just… locked him completely into himself, huh.) We can also see a movement through from a completely professional context in the first story, to an intensely interpersonal and internal context in the last one — even his fake stories spiral in towards intimacy, which I think is what he longs for here even if he can’t quite like. Touch that without the stories as a buffer yet, it’s clearly like touching a hot stove for him to interact with it too directly.

And you know what I find incredibly interesting the whole way through? Even on his deathbed, where he’s dying from the thing Tain had put in his head, he’s protecting Tain. He puts all the blame for where he is on himself (‘My future was limitless, until I threw it away’), even if he has to employ a strange twisty logic where he’s split himself into two to do it. Don’t get me wrong, Garak has done horrific things all on his own haha, but it’s notable that he almost isolates Tain from that. ‘Tain was the Obsidian Order. Not even the Central Command dared challenge him. And I was his right hand.’ Tain in Garak’s stories is this infallible implacable weirdly distant figure, even now. Indeed, as will make a lot of sense with the revelations further down the line, more than anything it seems the gaze of an abused child desperate for recognition looking up at an idealized (if not in any way nurturing) parent.‘He was retired at that point; he couldn't protect me’, Garak says, as if what he’d need protection from in the first place isn’t Tain himself lmao, as if Tain had no active part in any of this. He never lets blame touch Tain at all. At this stage he would rather consider himself a broken flawed tool than accept that the hands that have wrought and wielded him have ever had any fault in them. AND in the middle of it all, with plausible deniability, on death’s door and knocking meekly to be let in before he must finish the mortifying ordeal of being known and test the even more daunting possibility of being loved, Garak at the same time manages to drop the breadcrumb trail of clues to make it possible for Julian to find Tain if he so chooses and gets in the ‘sons of Tain’ thing too for future dramatic irony purposes. Truly he is the Michelangelo of lying. Every falsehood a multifaceted masterpiece. Elim ‘achieving a state of intertextuality in real life is possible if you work hard and believe in yourself’ Garak. I love him so much.

I think all of this is why “I forgive you. For whatever it is you did,” works so well, because it too works on a structural level. It’s such a deceptively multilayered response — it has the syntax of a joke, in a way, and it is kind of funny even under the circumstances, but delivered with such earnest warmth and fondness. It’s both recognition and acceptance (forgiveness!). It’s saying ‘I finally understand enough of what you’re trying to tell me beneath and through all that, in whatever way you’re capable of, I see you’ and ‘my answer hasn’t changed (bitch)’. The forgiveness Julian offers here is complete — on principle, and out of personal feeling and empathy (only one of which Garak deigns to respond to during the second story, where he calls it ‘smug Federation sympathy’, placing it more completely on the principle side than it probably is. ‘Dude you’re my friend please don’t just lie down and die in a completely avoidable way on me, who else is going to not only tolerate but actually gleefully enjoy me being annoying as fuck over lunch’ seems to be the subtext that’s a lot harder to acknowledge and invite in for both of them. And yet Tain seems perfectly clear on the fact that Julian is Garak’s friend, which, y’know. Must be fun living with the knowledge that Tain has eyes everywhere looming over you every day haha guess you’d just have to tune that out.)

Most of all — ’Don’t give up on me now, Doctor’... and he didn’t! He didn’t. Augh. Ow.

#garashir #elim garak #julian bashir #star trek ds9 #ds9 #star trek #ds9 meta #S2EP22 The Wire #alternate title: baby's first brush with unconditional love through unreliable narration lol #I'm not sure I got to say everything I want to in this/found the exact right words in places or hit all the nuances #but god help me I so desperately need this out of my brain to free up some disc space so go forth little meta haha be free #I'm sure I'll come back to you in time #meta #enabran tain #(derogatory)

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onlinekitsune · 1 year

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*playing uno with the brothers*

mammon: what is this game dude??

mammon: *continuously pulling cards*

mammon: ARE YOU SERIOUS? PLEASE...

*snickering from the other demon brothers*

mammon: *finally gets a red card*

mc: *hesitates placing their card, with a smug expression on their face*

mc: *places a red reverse card*

mammon: I DON'T HAVE A RED!!

mammon: *is back pulling cards, after pulling the third one he just lets out a scream*

*other brothers are just losing their shit at MC's cruel shenanigans*

no one is immune to mc's bullying (lovingly) i just think they all deserve to be bullied just a bit (again, lovingly!!) especially mammon.. :3 ☆post-divider by cafekitsune☆

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fairlyang · 4 months

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Para mi 🕷️

miguel wanting you to cum over and over again

w/c: 973

pairing: miguel o’hara x latina!reader

tags: 18+ smut. just a lil thought I had! porn no plot. overstimulation, fingering, praise, aftercare.

"Dame otra mami, tu puedes." Miguel murmured while he pumped three fingers into your poor fucked out cunt. (Give me another, you can do it)

You whimpered and closed your eyes shut, your body feeling so overwhelmed after already having three back to back orgasms. "Hazlo para mi, amor." He whispered making you moan and smile. (Do it for me, love)

He had wanted you to cum over and over him like usual, but this time he wanted to see if you could beat your highest score of three.

Not too much but only because he loved teasing you and edging you way before you get to cum for the first time.

Along with the amount of begging he wants to hear from you, every single time. He just couldn't help but want to hear your little pleads and the way your lips would form into a little pout with the most precious little doe eyes.

It was one of his favorite sights but right next to that were the lovely sounds that came out of your pretty mouth when he'd tease you while you were in the middle of pleading for him to let you cum.

All the little cries and moans always drove him insane. He swore he could cum just from hearing your moans while he ate you out or while he watched you ride him.

Just like he was so close to the edge right now while he was between your trembling legs as he fingered you and kissed along your thighs.

Your hands were gripping on his curls, not sure if you wanted him to stay put or push him away but it was definitely starting to feel overwhelming now as you had barely came for the third time less than five minutes ago.

"M-Miguel- es mucho-" you choked out and tried to move your hips back but his open arm quickly pulled them down assuring you won't move. (It's too much)

"Tu puedes bebé, ya casi." He whispers looking up into your eyes. (You can do it baby, almost there)

You gasped as he went in and started sucking on your clit earning himself whimpers from you. He groaned against you and pulled away still looking you directly in the eye when he licks his lips and all your slickness that was on them.

You moaned out in pure bliss from the pleasure he was giving you but also how he never failed to drive you crazy and always managed to make your cheeks a bright red, especially in moments like these.

"Mira que bonita te ves, preciosa." He says and motions to the mirror that was behind him from when he made you ride him reverse cowgirl in front of the mirror. (Look how pretty you look, beautiful)

He wanted you to watch as you took all of him, the way he held on to you, how he slammed his hips up and started fucking you when you looked too tired.

"Miguel-" you whimpered and felt your eyes getting hazy.

He started fucking you deeper at a faster speed which left you breathless. You finally felt your orgasm getting closer and closer as he continued and whispered the sweetest things. "Siempre tan hermosa." (Always so gorgeous)

"Mi amada siempre tan perfecta." (My beloved always so perfect)

"Tan bella." (So beautiful)

You cried out and started to grind your hips when he went back down to get another taste and suck on your clit again. Your legs began shaking more and you were clenching against his fingers as your juices were slipping out and down to your asshole. "Miguel ya voy-" (I'm gonna-)

He pulled away and curled his fingers up hitting that sweet spot oh so perfectly, "Ya se mami, hazlo. Uno más para mi." He murmured and moaned watching your body's reactions. (I know, do it. One more for me)

"Mírate en el espejo nena." He says and you nod, looking at your own reflection. (Look at yourself in the mirror baby girl)

You looked at how Miguel was on his knees and how breathtaking his body was, as if sculpted by Greek gods and sent down just for you.

His fingers worked their magic on you as they always do, when you then feel your entire body shake as you suddenly cum around his fingers, Miguel slowly down making sure you ride out your high. You let out a mixture of cries and moans all while Miguel himself realized he came against the comforter of your shared bed.

You laid back and closed your eyes, trying to calm your breathing down as Miguel slipped his fingers out of you slowly and gently.

You sighed and still felt your body shake involuntarily. You felt something warm against your skin and you open your eyes to see Miguel cleaning you up with a towel. You give him a small smile which he returns as he gently cleans you up.

He was always such a sweetheart after a night like this, always took care of you and made sure you were okay. He wanted to make sure he didn't overstep even if you didn't use your safe word, just wanted to ensure you were okay.

You feel a dent on the bed right next to you and you're softly moved to the top of the bed, now not on the edge of the bed. Miguel carefully wraps his arms around you and you immediately make yourself comfortable, melting into his loving touch.

He kissed your forehead and rubbed soft slow circles along your back as you finally calmed down. "Te amo tanto amor." He whispered and you hum, yet another blush growing on your cheeks. (I love you so much love)

"Te amo mas" you whisper back and feel yourself dozing off. (I love you more)

#miguel ohara #across the spiderverse #miguel ohara x reader #miguel ohara x y/n #miguel ohara imagine #miguel o hara #miguel ohara smut #atsv miguel #miguel ohara oneshot

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cabbagewithissues · 14 days

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Things I wrote down while watching this week’s Game Changer

- “I’m just, like, holding four separate realities right now”

- Zac!Grant O’Brien

- sidebar it would’ve been really funny for Brennan to fill in for that role as well

- The reveal of the schtick

- Sam Dalton??

- Siobhan’s “I’ve been here the whole time”

- Really bad paper cut

- Siobhan’s absolutely sick dab

- “Absolutely slathered in spaghetti and its meated balls”

- Trapp ordering a hit??

- The clown walk 🤢

- Ash joining in on the Wenis dance round 2

- “Hello, Sam 😑”

- Did the mic not closing set this whole matrix off?

- Sorry what was that glitch in Sam’s third intro??

- Sam will not be passing podium inspection

- Ify getting the HTML code 🫶🏻

- The equation switch-up

- Illegal Ladder

- Ify invents capitalism

- Bribing the inspector!

- Sam seemed genuinely delighted

- Loving the increasing numbers on the Wenis dance

- Corrupted footage slay

- What’s that? It’s Siobhan with boxes!

- Flashback baby Sam?!

- They truly will never forget the capital of Burkina Faso

- Trapp with the notebook!

- Twerk on ‘em, Ify

- Siobhan not being able to reach even with the boxes bc she is three apples tall

- “Dirty in your soul”

- I love the brain work of “how many more times will we have to bribe Sam and/or other cast members”

- How much spaghetti did they prep for Zac!Grant O’Brien’s bit

- Give me the Wenis dance rehearsal footage

- I’m desperate to know how long this shoot was

- Love the Dracula deep cut

- Is that a deep cut? Idk

- Ify claiming all the ducks is iconic

- Random ponytail inspection uno reverse

- Wenis Dance: Final Boss

- I’m deeply distrustful of this ending

#rain rambles #game changer #siobhan thompson #ify nwadiwe #mike trapp #sam reich #game changer spoilers

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anincompletelist · 2 months

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wip wednesday :D

HAPPY WEDNESDAY PEOPLE! this *might* be the earliest I have ever been for one of these..... which is fair given how atrociously LATE I've been the last two weeks jshdjksh

I'm trying to catch up on tags so I'll put them beneath the cut, along with the snippet I'm sharing to make up for the last line, six sentence sunday, AND wip wednesday tags. so, if you're tagged, I'm pulling an uno reverse and tagging you BACK again (pls tell me this makes sense it is 2am here ksjhdskjhd) ANYWAY THANK YOU ALL I ADORE YOU AND YOUR LOVELY WORDS AND THANK YOU ALWAYS FOR THINKING OF ME! xx

this snippet is from yet another new wip and is of the omegaverse / a/b/o variety, so if that's not your thing please feel free to skip and come back next week!

enjoy! <3

Alex doesn’t look all that much different even a couple of years later, still just as paradoxical as he’s always been— fearlessly confident and yet frenetically, undeniably unsettled. Pez had made a joke once that being around Alex was like touching static electricity, hair standing on end and shocks dancing along fingertips. Henry, for all his distaste, might be inclined to agree.

He watches as Alex strikes up a conversation with a pretty blonde woman at the bar beside him, can make out the curve of his grin and just barely hear the tones of his laugh from across the room. For a few minutes it seems like things are going well, but then the woman shakes her head with a muted smile and backs away, eventually disappearing into another group on the other side of the floor.

Henry’s second drink is empty by the time two others have come and gone, a taller man that Alex had approached himself and another person who’d come up to him to chat afterward. Despite Alex actively engaging in the conversations, Henry watches each of them leave after a few minutes like clockwork, glances down at his own wrist and knows the feeling.

After the third person excuses themselves, the confident line of Alex’s shoulders gradually begins to fade, curling in on himself just a little as he stirs the ice around in his drink with his straw. He’s raising it to his mouth, about to take a sip when he glances up to scan the room again and his eyes finally land on Henry.

He pauses, his mouth split open and drink still hovering in front of him as his cheeks and the sides of his neck darken lightly. Henry doesn’t look away. Alex does though, and he furrows a brow at the floor as if warring with himself before his eyes flick back up again, questioning.

Henry doesn’t break the contact as he steps sideways and slides into an unoccupied velvet, half-circled booth, the seat opposite him noticeably vacant. Alex’s chest rises and falls again as he takes yet another steadying breath, squeezes his eyes shut, then spins and marches over, crossing the floor and dropping down across from Henry sans the welcoming smile he'd offered everyone else.

“Alex,” Henry says in greeting.

He blinks, grumbling. “Henry.”

Clearing his throat, Henry leans back and spreads his knees just a bit underneath the table, leaving his wrist out openly on the table between them beside his drink. It’s obvious when Alex tries not to look, even more so when he does, the column of his throat shifting in the low light.

Then, carefully, Alex draws one hand out of his own lap to rest it at the edge of the table, the angle drawing his sleeve up just enough to expose the bands he’s chosen.

Alpha, which Henry’d been expecting, and Submissive, which he very much had not.

OK HERE'S THE RUNDOWN:

@kiwiana-writes @cricketnationrise @eusuntgratie @violetbaudelaire-quagmire @bigassbowlingballhead @wordsofhoneydew @zwiazdziarka @firenati0n @suseagull04 @onthewaytosomewhere @iboatedhere @junebugclaremontdiaz @sunnysideprince @priincebutt @inexplicablymine @heybuddy-drabbles @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @getmehighonmagic @sparklepocalypse @magicandarchery @oxfordslutphase @itsmaybitheway @ninzied @futureseaempress @captainjunglegym @nocoastposts AND I THINK THAT IS EVERYONE? IF I MISSED YOU PLS COME AND YELL AT ME THANKS <3333

(and also open tag as per usual)

I HOPE YOU ARE ALL HAVING A LOVELY WEEK SO FAR! :D xx

#wips

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wxnheart · 9 months

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𝙶𝚛𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝙰𝚏𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚜 - 𝐏𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐩 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

Make me remember you Like you remember me

He's the man you love to hate. Hate-fuck that is. Fucker is slicker than a can of oil.

What defines Graves beyond his ability to get under your skin is the fact that he does it with no effort at all. He can breathe and it'll piss you off. The fact that he knows that he gets under your skin and doesn't have to go out of his way to do it (but still chooses to) pisses you off even more.

To put the icing on the cake, you're a thousand percent sure that the root cause of your agitation is sexual. Because he makes it so.

He's not the gentle, encouraging lover that Price is. He's not the service sensualist that drives Alejandro. No... his sex is of a primal and teasing nature. You'll get yours. Eventually. After he's done with you.

Graves is the one who'll keep you sexually frustrated throughout the day. He's the one who'll hit you with a double entendre while in the middle of a seemingly innocent conversation; the third party in question would think nothing of it meanwhile you can't get away fast enough.

He's a crooner of the dangerous kind. You don't know if you want to choke his ass out or suck his dick. And his pet name for you? "Darlin'." Fuckkkk. The inflection never changes, not even when he's fucking you viciously or you're slurping on his dick something fierce. Always, always!— "Darlin'."

His foreplay is frustrating. Graves also leaves hickeys in very, VERY obvious places, and your lips are almost always swollen fucking with him and his searing kisses. Tongue and teeth, darlin'.

Has daredevil tendencies. Graves has no problem fucking you silly when there's nothing but the fucking door separating you from the rest of Shadow Company. You're doing everything in your power to keep from screaming the place down and all Graves does is smirk like the sleazy fuck he is. Careful now. Don't want to alert everybody now do you, darlin'?

Favors doggy and mating press; the former is all so he can make you come apart just by the way he whispers all kinds of filthy shit in your ear. The second is because he absolutely likes watching you come apart.

Orgasm denial while fucking you silly is another reason to hate him. Will always stop when you're close and then thrust back in like he didn't just ruin your high. Son of a bitch.

Is always in control even when you don't think he is. Goads you like a motherfucker. You think pulling a UNO Reverse and denying him is revenge? Think again. "That it, darlin'? And here I thought you were gonna surprise me." Yeah, it's that kinda ballgame. Wanna get yours? Gonna have to make him cum. Make it memorable for him, baby.

And when you're fucked out, catching your breath, here comes Phillip to goad you again. He's a little less smarmy this time, but you can't help but shiver at the way his eyes devour you as they trail up and down your body. "Tired already, darlin'? And here I thought you could last longer than that. Guess you can prove me wrong next time." Aw, fuck.

#cutie 𝓠.#phillip graves #phillip graves x reader #call of duty #call of duty modern warfare 2 #call of duty x reader #shadow company #nsfw.#fuckboy extraordinaire.

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rius-cave · 2 months

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I saw everyone bringing up angst and Adam's abadonment issues, and I've got a nice Uno reverse abadonment:

There's this apocryphal legend that Adam had a wife besides Lilith and Eve, an unnamed third one. God made her after Lilith left, but he created her organs and bones first. Adam saw the whole thing and it scared him so much that he didn't want her afterwards, he wouldn't even go near her. So she was sent away from Eden

So I imagine him bringing that up at the hotel (probably with Lucifer), either because he feels sorry that she was kicked out, all because he couldn't bring himself to accept her. Or he has repressed the whole thing. Badly. And now he's trying to figure out why he didn't want the gorgeus lady, despite her having huge tits and everything

Oh shit. These Eden and Adam legends are getting fucking crazy here LMFAO WOW

I like that you topped this off with "she has huge tits" yeah this is the information that Adam would give.

#hazbin hotel #adam #ask

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goldenblu · 2 months

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ohhh my gosh that whole mask sanji idea has me REELING. sanji gains emotions the hard way but he's constantly questioning if it's real or not, if it's still an act, if it has ever been an act, who is his loyalty to now, to his country or his crew? which family? and maybe stealth black has been a mask as well, maybe that cruel, apathetic assassin is a product of pretending for the vinsmokes- so is there anything left of him that is not hollow desire to play for affection?

even if there isn't. the strawhats will love every part of him they find. maybe it will be hard at first, maybe they will feel betrayed and lost and angry. but he is nakama, and a mask is still a product of skin and bone. he has always been capable of being sanji.

like no pressure to continue on this idea in fic form but my god, if you have any more thoughts on this or anything like it i would pay to see them <3 it's so beautiful

YOU. YOU GET IT.

asdksfja;lksjf sanji realizes that he’s come to see the strawhats as something more than a target, a tool to use and then cast away.

(he doesn’t dare to think the word family because that would be a betrayal of his real family, wouldn’t it? it would be an admission of his failure, and he refuses to be a failure.)

it’s all part of the act, he tells himself. it doesn’t mean anything. it won’t last.

but it doesn’t change the fact that he remembers all the strawhats’ favorite foods, that he knows how tell when chopper needs a little hot chocolate pick-me-up, that fighting back to back with zoro feels in sync and familiar in a way that it shouldn’t. all of these useless pieces of information and instincts that he shouldn’t have but does anyway.

so sanji panics—and isn’t that a new experience for him, panicking. every time the strawhats look at him, they see someone who doesn’t actually exist, shouldn’t exist. it makes him feel some emotion that he’s never felt before and can’t identify. it’s terrible; he can’t stand to be this person he’s not for any longer.

maybe he’s the one to reveal his true identity and goal to the strawhats. because he knows he’s in too deep; he needs to cut these ties himself and finish the mission he should have finished long ago.

or maybe it’s not up to him at all, maybe judge sends one of his brothers to find him because he’s taking too long. ichiji or whoever shows up on the sunny, gets a laugh out of sanji trying to play house on a boat, and then announces that sanji doesn’t need to pretend anymore, it’s time to deal the finishing blow and return home with whatever information he’s acquired.

however it happens, sanji does the whole “my name is vinsmoke sanji” speech from wci except it’s real this time, and that’s how the truth comes out. which is fine, it doesn’t matter what the strawhats think of him. it’s better this way, it’s better that they know where sanji’s true loyalties lie: with germa.

(right? this has always been an indisputable fact. so why does he feel so conflicted about it now?)

i don’t know how the plot would play out from here but later, when push comes to shove, sanji realizes at the very last minute that all he’s doing is exchanging one mask for another. he can’t go back to how things were before—his father won’t like that one of his perfect sons is compromised with such weaknesses, but more than that, sanji doesn’t want to be the emotionless third prince of germa anymore.

(the thought he won’t allow himself to think: maybe he never did.)

he never realized before that it was possible to have the freedom to choose, but he does now. so he pulls an uno reverse card and instead of betraying the strawhats, he betrays the only life he’s ever known and saves the strawhats instead, very publicly turning his back on the vinsmokes. the details of how exactly this happens escape me but let’s assume he’s successful in telling germa to fuck off. (for now, at least. i imagine this doesn’t last since judge would be unimaginably angry and go after him, but that’s a problem for later sanji.)

regardless, when it’s all said and done, sanji doesn’t expect the strawhats to allow him back onto the crew. he’s not a good person, he’s deceived and killed hundreds of people in cold blood. he lied to them, betrayed them, pretended to be someone he’s not. the strawhats know that now. by all rights, they should want to kill him. most people would. sanji would.

but they don’t. sanji doesn’t know what they see in him, but whatever it is, it’s enough for luffy accept him even after everything he’s done. admittedly, the rest of the crew still has their reservations; it’s clear enough that they’re hurt and angry and wary of him.

you broke our trust, nami tells him.

i know. sanji hesitates, and then says, i’m sorry.

it’s new to him, this feeling of guilt eating away at him, and he almost stumbles over the words. he’s never had to apologize before, not genuinely. stealth black doesn’t apologize. stealth black doesn’t feel regret.

but he’s not stealth black anymore. he’s someone else. he doesn’t know who, exactly, but he does know who he wants to be. black leg sanji, the man who only existed on this ship for these past few weeks/months, the man who was capable of caring and being cared for—sanji wants that to be real.

luffy’s giving you a chance to rebuild it, nami says. so don’t waste it.

it’s hard, at first. sanji has never not had to play a role before so now he’s confronted with the question: what parts of him are the result of the persona he puts on and what parts are truly sanji? he’s worn a mask in some form or another for so long—certain things are so ingrained in him that he can’t tell the difference anymore.

the next time he cooks dinner, he wonders: is this desire to feed his the crew real, or is it a leftover habit from black leg sanji? the next time he kills someone for going after the strawhats, he wonders: this ruthless capacity for violence, does that come from himself or from vinsmoke sanji?

but maybe it doesn’t matter where it came from because he can make it his. because nothing can take away the fact that for the first time, sanji is doing what he wants to do and not just what he’s told to do.

he says as much to luffy, who smiles and responds, i always knew you could do it.

and over time, the strawhats begin to trust him again. usopp stops being quite so nervous around him. nami starts working on her maps in the galley again, and this time sanji doesn’t have to lie when she asks him questions about the islands he’s been to. zoro tells him that he’d better not hold back during their spars, so sanji stops trying to hide it and lets his sharp edges stay sharp and dangerous and deadly. chopper learns the truth about sanji’s physical enhancements but it doesn’t stop him from worrying over him anyway, which makes sanji’s chest feel warm for some reason.

(and that’s a whole other thing—now sanj has to figure out how the fuck he’s supposed to deal with having emotions because holy shit do you people feel this way all the time?? it’s so much, it’s overwhelming.

he keeps having to ask: what is this feeling or that feeling or that feeling?? and everyone teaches him: fear. sadness. happiness. all things that sanji once thought were impossible for him to feel.)

he still struggles to balance kindness and cruelty sometimes—though he’s capable of feeling compassion now, it’s mainly only ever for the strawhats, and he’s still merciless to anyone he considers an enemy. in any case, his crew is there to support him, to help him figure out: who is he in the absence of everything that’s defined the last nineteen years of his life?

the answer? the cook of the strawhat pirates, sanji. just sanji. that’s who he is and who he’ll always be.

#one piece #sanji #black leg sanji #vinsmoke sanji #stealth black sanji au #i need to come up with better au names lmao #got a bit sappy at the end there but it’s okay IN THIS HOUSE WE EMBRACE CRINGE #ask #mine #my writing #in a perfect world i would write a fic for this but alas it’s not gonna happen #don’t have the bandwidth and also #(slight spoiler warning for hold your fire)#i think it might overlap a bit with what i have planned for the second half of hyf hehe #WHICH I STILL HAVENT STARTED WRITING YET orz

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randomnameless · 3 months

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Reverse uno card : Jugdral edition

2014 : "yay, i can't wait for a Judgral remake, with updated graphics!!!"

2024 : "gods please no remake"

What happened in ten years to make me dread the remake I would have sold my soul for back in the days?

Well... IS's policies and new writing, mainly.

While I was joking about "Genealogy of the Holy Self Insert" in 2015, I still had faith in eventual Jugdral remakes. Sure, we were in the big Fateswakening era where the only things I could frown at IS were the "writings" worshipping self inserts (Ryoma being jealous of Corn's talents, when Corn was like, 5?) - but I still had hope for a more "serious" FE, and I first I was very delighted by FE15 - no self insert, a more "serious" setting, no hyperbolic time chambers to try to explain in watsonian words why second gens exist, etc...

But there was still something ringing dead wrong with FE15, which I only noticed thanks to FE16 and its years of discourse - at one point, IS's writing went in a certain direction that makes it impossible, imo, for us to have a "correct" Jugdral remake, as long as IS still follows this direction.

I'm not talking about uwufest - even if it is part of the larger problem - but back in FE15, I remember being really pissed at the schizophrenia of the plot : saying one thing and the inverse at the same time.

The narration reminds us of the classic Kaga lesson : whatever madness exists in dragon/gods, a greater madness/evil lurks in the heart of men.

And yet, we have the Hero (who was so cajoled by the plot that, at times, you have to wonder if Alm wasn't the devs's self insert, he's lavished with praises almost as extensively as Ike was!) saying nonsense - without being contradicted by characters at all (or when Celica does it, she admits later she's wrong) - like Duma being responsible, mainly, for the events that transpired in Valentia and, novelty that wouldn't have been in the original game since the character was made for the remake, Berkut's fall and madness.

By that point in the game, the player saw that Berkut hunts low class people for what he sees and perceives as sport, is the textbook classicist asshat noble, but has a lot of pression on his shoulders due to his role of being the heir of the Empire, pression that isn't alleviated at all by his Uncle who mocks him and refuses to give him a third chance... to fight against a person said uncle very well knows cannot be defeated by Berkut himself, especially as said Uncle pretended to "care" for him, only to pit him against his trueborn son whom he names his heir just before dying.

Point is : Berkut feels betrayed by Rudy and goes mad - because of this betrayal : Rudolph named him heir when he fully knew Alm was alive and was the true heir he always wanted, in Berkut's eyes, no matter what he did, it wouldn't have mattered to Rudolph since Rudolph planned on giving Alm his throne since day 1 - of course, without telling him a thing and making him believe he would one day become Emperor.

Is it Duma's fault that Berkut went off the deep-end in Part 4? Because Rudolph's shit gambit involved playing with the life of his nephew and crush it in a bid to have Alm unify the continent against Duma ? Or... it's just Rudolph being an asshole, not curbing the worst of his nephew tendencies (and in a larger part, of Rigel in general) ?

Now, Rinea. She too, is called one of Duma's victims, and yet, who pushed her in Duma's magic pyre that turns women in witches? Duma himself?

No.

Berkut, who already, when pissed tells her "silence woman" pushes his fiancée and love of his life in a pyre to sacrifice her, because in his grief and rage (caused by Rudy!!!) Rinea is only a pawn to be sacrificed to gain more power to kill Alm. Sure sure, Berkut is redeemed in death and Rinea - in a classic Kaga style writing that wasn't here made by Kaga since this plot is basically new so where the fuck does this sexism come from - forgives him and they both die and ascend to another plane of existence.

The point is, despite what Alm says, Berkut and Rinea's fates weren't caused by Duma's degeneration - but by Rudolph and Berkut's own actions.

Heck, I remember when I was sort of live-blogging my run back then, Desaix's greed and lust for power wasn't fueled by Mila's apathy : it wasn't Mila who burnt Celica's house and tried to cook Conrad, it was Desaix, and why Desaix did it? Because he wanted to become king. That's it, and that's all.

So why FE15 - while giving the Kaga message - still tries its hardest to pin the blame of everything "wrong that happened" on... dragon gods, refusing to acknowledge the own responsibilities of humans in their suffering?

I think we had that lunar dialogue at the end of FE15 (or in part 4?) where Clive (i think?) tells Alm without gods giving their blessings, people in Valentia will starve, and Alm saying that may be so, but ultimately Valentia will survive and work hard through those upcoming harsh times to demonstrate how humans, when they work together, can achieve things without needing to rely on Gods - basically, King Alm tells his people to starve now because Humanity will come out stronger afterwards, since they will have learnt to grow their own food without needing magic dragon blessings to make the ground fertile.

... yeah. That's definitely going to work.

FE15 took the Kaga lesson to try to hammer some "humanity fuck yeah!" Square JRPG message and it completely messed up what FE2 tried to say.

(I confess, retconning Duma'n'Mila in dragon gods like Naga from Archanea was a big part in this shitstorm - that was also retconned to explain Grima from FE13! - i mean Duma'n'Mila have to die because they're degenerating, but they didn't get the memo from Gotoh living overseas that degeneration can be stopped by using dragonstones, instead of being a fatality that must be dealt with death...)

Humans cannot be held responsible for what they did, everything BaD that happened is somehow due to the influence of dragon-gods : even if it means "suffering" and sacrificing a part of your population, this choice is a good one to get rid of the obviously nefarious influence of dragon-gods.

So, is it so surprising that FE16 - the most popular title in the franchise uwu - went in the same direction?

Even if it tried to mitigate the "gods BaD" spiel because the avatar - Billy - is the Goddess reborn, the thing is the CoS - aka the dragon - is blamed for humanity's mistakes through each route (AM dodges the question completely) and all routes end up with the dragon going away (her skull being cracked open, or she retires, or she dies off-screen, or she dies because the plot commands so unless you want, as the player, to shag her).

"But in VW, Claude reconsiders his initial stance!"

And yet, it is only off-screen that he seemingly becomes aware that Fodlan people are not superpals with Almyra because Almyra raids them, not because Rhea told them Almyrans are BaD, that's why he tries to negotiate - off-screen and post-game - some sort of ceasefire between the two parties, or at least make it so Almyra doesn't try to raid Fodlan every Thursday for their weekly dick measuring contest.

No matter the ending, Rhea retires and in the worst support, muses on her failings for "having turned a blind eye" to Fodlan and its people in her quest to resurrect Sothis : aka, Rhea (and the game, since Billy doesn't tell her anything) believes Fodlan's state is due to her inaction and not, you know, the action of the humans who lived in the continent and ruined it of their own volition.

Which is also what fuels the endless discourse about what kind of power she has - or not : Rhea BaD for using her power, but also BaD for not using it and letting humans to their own devices.

Supreme Leader's memetastic line from the trailers ring even more true : in Fodlan, Crusts are to blame for everything. For Adrestian being attracted to young women because otherwise without crests they surely wouldn't seek to bed a 12 years old Doro, for Miklan trying to murder his younger brother (and not because, at least FE16 wise, Miklan is a terrible person who is very jealous and not afraid to kill even a child to get what he feels like he deserves), and for people basically killing their wives/letting their daughters die to get a "suitable" heir.

Humanity/Humans can get a pass for doing horrible things (Berkut burning his fiancée alive) because those horrible things can sort of be linked to "dragon-gods", and so, the blame exclusively lays at their feet.

I am always reminded of that Obi-Wan reply to Anakin when Ani accuses him of having turned Padmé "against" him, Obi-Wan basically tells him he brought this upon himself.

Now, what would Obi-Wan tell a non-recruited Doro who blames the Goddess for the War, the leader she is actually protecting, started?

Billy is no Obi-Wan, so we are left in this limbo where characters are telling you everything wrong that happens in Fodlan is due to "dragon blood" aka their existence and presence, even dragons who blame themselves for "being blind" - but not once do we have the Kaga message, or an Obi-Wan reminding people that they have to take responsability for their own actions : Hanneman will blame crests (dragons) for having killed his sister, but not the man who forced her (marital abuse?) to bear him many heirs until one was "good enough" for him.

Claude blames dragons for creating, both literal and metaphorical walls between Fodlan and Almyra - and it's only in his best ending, after the game credits and off-screen that he seems to realise that those walls were built by Almyrans raiders.

"enough about the fodlan rant, what about jugdral?"

Jugdral was sort of unique for not having a giant eldritch abomination as a boss, unlike the later FE8, we never fight Loptyr in his "original" form, Loptyr is fought through his host, Julius.

And I love Jugdral because unlike Fodlan, the local evil death cult might stage a few skirmishes and manipulations here and there, but Jugdral people are... asses, in general.

Elliot will mount an army to seduce Raquie while Eldie is away - and it's not because Manfroy told him to seduce her, no, Elliot does it from his own will.

Reptor'n'Langobalt'n'Andrei rebel against Kurth and Azmur? Sure, Arvis is pulling some of their strings, but Reptor'n'Langobalt are ambitious, even without Manfroy whispering anything.

Arvis pulls out his gambit... with Manfroy's help (and blackmail?), but also because he genuinely thinks he can sacrifice lives to make HIS world a reality because HE has great ideas about how the world should be and will torch anyone who opposes him.

F!Lewyn, as much as I dislike the character, reminds the cast that while Travant's actions might seem justified to him and to the Thracian people, he is still a man who assaulted a bunch of randoms + non-combattants in a desert, amushed them and slaughtered them : no matter his reasons and how justified he was, Travant is still a criminal to Jugdral people.

In Jugdral, people do things and have to take responsability for it - Oldvis basically dies after losing everything he had - by Seliph's hand (and with his own participation!!) because Oldvis has to take responsability for what he did in Barhara. Ditto for Travant, who accepts to die if it means the peninsula will be united (tfw his son doesn't understand what he meant !).

Dragon blood and Dragon people are never blamed for the shitty state Jugdral is in in the 1st or even 2nd gen, if Danan turned Isaach in giant brothel, it's not Julius-Loptyr who asked him to do so, nor Manfroy.

At least, that was the case for the pre FE15/FEH/FE16 Jugdral.

Now...

While I want to blame FE16 for this shift, I know the roots are more ancient (FE15?), IS's writing seems to favour a certain narrative, aka people having sad and or complicated fates because of their brands and Holy Blood - when the ONLY case of having a fate tied to Holy Blood was the Curse of the Gae Bolg, aka a sibling quarrel between Dain and Noba that will eventually "curse" Noba descendants, but through the events of the game we know that curse is more like a prophecy : Quan doesn't die because he had Noba Holy Blood, Quan dies because Travant kills him in Yied. Why Travant kills him? FE5 reveals Quan and his forefathers are basically letting Thracians starve and refuse to "give" them arable lands, or even export food.

Now, did Travant kill Quan because Quan had major Noba Holy Blood, or because Quan (and his forefather)'s policies made Thracians so desperate that their king feels like he has to resort to murder to "save" his people?

The issue is more complicated than "he has Noba HB so I had to kill him".

Come FEH and we had, in 2018 (before FE16 but after FE15) this :

My blood has granted me gifts, it's true. I have expended every effort to be worthy of those gifts. That same blood makes it impossible for me to live a peaceful life. That's a lesson I learned from my mother...

Now, even if I was dissecting and hc'ing and posting about Saias a lot for 5 years, I fully understand Saias is a character with maybe 20 lines in FE5, so you can only dissect the script and theorise and read between invisible lines to get something about the character.

But this?

It might be a reference to Cowen's last words who basically tells him his job is to "pass on" his Fjalar HB, and how having major Fjalar HB was the reason why Manfroy tried to kill him when he was younger (his mother Aida died to protect him).

And yet, FEH here seems to imply Aida died because Saias had Fjalar HB, and not, y'know, died because Manfroy wanted to kill him due to this HB.

It wasn't HB who killed Aida, but Manfroy!

FE5 never reveals why - but if Fjalar HB was the reason why Manfroy targeted Saias, then why the fuck wasn't Oldvis iced earlier, since he has the same brand and blood?

In a way, Saias blaming HB here as the "reason" why his mother died and why he cannot live a "peaceful life" is similar to a Leif who would blame Quan'n'Ethlyn for being the reason why Travant and the Empire were after his life : what is to blame, their "blood" that makes people want to kill them, or the fuckers who want to kill them?

Granted those lines from FEH completely miss the point of Saias as a character - FE5!wise Saias is in a class that cannot use fire magic, when his HB automatically gives him the highest rank in fire magic, and he is funnily enough the only character who "retreats" in his death quote -> Saias doesn't "expend" every effort to be worthy of HB, he hides and doesn't use the abilities given by said HB!

We can say, mkay, this was just FEH trying to fit their "gods and their influence BaD" narrative and missing the real culprits, aka humans themselves (Manfroy is one!) - from FE15 - in Jugdral, even if it meant retconning a character no one cares about.

But then, last year, we had Galzus' FB :

You speak of the blood of the Sword Saint Od. Perhaps. Is that the reason you have been set on a path of violence and bloodshed?

Nyx says Galzus' "curse" isn't tied to his HB, but it's basically his regret at not having been able to save his daughter.

So far, it's completely the inverse of what I decried, so this was a good FB, right?

There is no doubt that the blood within you compels you to lead a cruel life. However, the loss of your daughter was the wedge that split your life into pieces and let the curse in.

Damn it Nyx, why???

Why Galzus's brand "compels him" to lead a cruel life - when it was just established that Galzus fell to despair and became a mercenary who kills for money after the loss of his daughter?

Before losing Mareeta, Galzus, at least per this FB, wasn't killing people right and left as the merc he now is (or was in FE5).

Now, much like Saias...

Why was Galzus left to roam around Jugdral with a toddler to begin with?

I had a daughter. When my wife died, I brought my daughter with me as I traveled around Jugdral.

This FB establishes that Galzus settled with Mareeta's biomom for a while, but when she died he "traveled around". Why Galzus couldn't return "home" and had to "travel around"?

You know the Ribaut family was devastated by our own House Isaach.

Timeline wise : Ribaut is already demolished during the prologue of FE4, and Mareeta is no older than Leif himself, which means she was born after Galzus' grandfather and Ayra's brother, aka, his uncle, beheaded his dad and demolished his kingdom. Galzus, in exile, had Mareeta, and then had to "travel around" Jugdral because his home had already been demolished by "House Isaach" -

Note how Ayra talks about the Ribaut (i prefer rivough but meh) family when she talks about her very own sister - Galzus' mother. Jugdral family trees being what they are, Shanan, Larcei, Scatach and Galzus are actually cousins, Galzus is Ayra's own nephew, just like Shanan!

Anyways, in FE4, the reason given behind Ribaut's destruction is their attack on Darna, so the Isaachian royals killed them.

Galzus' "cruel life" wasn't compelled by his HB, Galzus' life took a turn for the worst when his Uncle and Grandpa knocked at his door and slaughtered his entire family, destroying their Kingdom.

So why FEH tried to fit his backstory in some sort of "dragon blood is to blame" Fodlan narrative?? They at least acknowledge the bad blood (lel) between Isaach's royal family and Ribaut's, hell, Ayra even wants to say Mareeta is a part of Isaach's royal family in her FB with her son, so it's not to whitewash the Isaachian royal family because their units are more popular and would sell more...

Contrary to Saias, Galzus's writing and his FB seem to have been made by people who cared and didn't completely ignore what the character was about so... why this emphasis on his HB ??

Are we bound in post FE16 releases to have, at least with the current writing team, the excuse of "dragon blood is to blame" ? Galzus cannot blame the Isaachian Royal Family or even the slavers for his (and his daugher's!) fate, but he can blame his HB, aka, a non-entity?

Will HB be now used as a "responsibility free" card, because the fate a character suffers or their actions are only tied to said HB? Arvis will get a pass because his HB compelled him to save the world (tfw Victor prefered to "seduce" women instead), Lewyn will be lightly chided by his mom instead of receiving the beatdown he has in FE4 because his HB now makes him unable to stay in place? Ditto for Ced, Karin won't chew him out for abandoning his mother and sister because his HB compelled him to travel around, so in the end, dragons are to blame for him abandoning his sister and mother?

That's what I'm the most afraid in future Jugdral remakes, that had humans characters with human flaws in a crapsack/shitty verse, the insertion in a future remake of a very Squenix "but aksuhally gods and church bad" when Jugdral is the pinnacle of "the world sucks because people living in this world suck". No need for secret sects manipulating everything in the shadows like FE16's Agarthans, Chagall is a horrible person without needing Manfroy's help, and Hilda will not say "Holy Blood is to blame" when she tortures Tailte to death.

When Tailte is caught and Hilda'd, it's because she participated (or even commited) in parricide, and because her camp/army lost the battle. She doesn't die because of her HB, she dies because Hilda kills her, most likely, for having killed Reptor (Hilda wants to avenge her "father" when fought, i'm pretty sure she means her father in law aka Reptor!).

As befits a game called "Genealogy of the Holy War", people aren't targeted because of their HB, but they are targeted because they are part of a genealogy - see the Leif comparison earlier on : Leif is hunted because he is Quan's son, even if he doesn't have Noba major blood. Seliph is hunted because he is Siggy'n'Deedee's son, not because of his Baldo HB.

In FE4, Manfroy tells Julius Arvis was a thorn at their side because "Fjalar's ways" ran too strong in him - implying he had some moral fiber that would make him oppose the return of Loptyr (but those same "ways" didn't prevent him from torching his own brother and conquering the world...) - I will have to check the translation and og script, but was Saias targeted because he had Fjalar HB, or because he could develop the same moral fiber Arvis does in his later years, or just, because he is Arvis's son? Cowen seems to suggest it is FB, but we know Fjalar HB cannot harm Loptyr so... what was the true reason?

Blaming dragon-gods reduces the complexity of Jugdral's setting and characters - and in a post FEH world where tropes win character contests and sell a lot of alts if they are flanderised enough + a post FE15/16 world where characters, to be likeable enough, have to ditch their responsibilities or at least have the plot elude them to pin them instead on vague and non-important (gacha wise) gods, what is going to happen to Jugdral?

Fanfics are fanfics and people are free to write whatever they want - but I wonder (especially after Nopes and the plethora of 'golden endings' fics that ended up with the CoS as the big bad lol) if fics where Mareeta and Ced blaming their HB for their various hardships is going to become the new canon...

I seriously hope it will never, and it if happens then...

I guess I'll still yell at cloud and nerd about the 1990s versions of those games, completely ignoring the new releases (save for maybe updated artwork).

Tl;Dr : FEH makes me afraid Judgral remakes will borrow the "humanity fuck yeah" page from FE15 and FE16 and put the blame of Jugdral's shitty situation from Jugdralians to... Holy Blood and "dragon-gods", completely missing and rewritting the point of those games. IS already said "fig" to Kaga once or thrice, but this might become the most contentious "fig" they ever give him if they decided to write a Jugdral remake this way.

#rant #heroes salt #fe series salt #at least the few last games #FE17 is a breath of fresh air #will it become the new standard or will we have more and more shit like those FBs?#jugdral stuff #at this point i'm afraid of that fandom syndrome #where you put much more thoughts and love and care about a setting than its own authors #so when said authors develop it you're disappointed #because you feel like it's a downgrade to what it was before #like star wars maybe?#i'm very worried about the writing of future games especially since the faux issues raised in Fodlan games apparently #made people want more writting as consistent as pudding #as long as has a veneer of being solid and realistic

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thebroccolination · 1 year

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Back in January of 2021, I made a thread on Twitter praising SOTUS S, so I'm gonna post it here for safekeeping (with some inclusions and edits – there's no character limit here yay) because it's still one of my favorite threads.

SOTUS S - One of My Favorite Series in Terms of Writing and Why I Love It as Much as I Do

One of my favorite aspects of SOTUS S is also something I see it widely critiqued for, so lemme heap some well-deserved praise on my beloved series.

I think Arthit's awkward, uncomfortable, and almost cold behavior is realistic, because That's the Point.

Allow me to explain.

Okay, so here's the timeline as I understand it:

• SOTUS takes place during Kongphob's first year and Arthit's third • The special scenes at the end of SOTUS S episodes are during Kongphob's first/second year and Arthit's third/fourth year • The main storyline of SOTUS S is set during Kongphob's third year as head hazer and Arthit's post-graduation entry into the working world

The reason I start by outlining that is to highlight a brilliant thing SOTUS S does with two timelines compared to SOTUS, which only has one:

SOTUS S shows us two very different stages of their relationship.

When they were in university together and part of the same world:

and

2. After they've been separated into different worlds:

That difference fuels and contextualizes the central conflict of SOTUS S: Arthit closeting himself and his relationship from his coworkers.

So why does he do that?

Well, Arthit is two years older than Kongphob, and when they start dating, he already has an established level of status at their university. He has a close circle of friends who stand up for him and sacrifice for him, he has the respect of his juniors and seniors, and he also maintains a high academic standing. It tracks that Arthit at this stage of his life is at his most open and confident with his relationship with Kongphob. Everyone knows, and he's fine.

At the end of SOTUS, he happily tells everyone that they're dating. This is immediately after they've publicly exchanged a matching set of bracelets that Arthit bought to replace the SOTUS string.

When Kongphob's car breaks down, Arthit shuttles Kongphob to his next class on the back of his bike. Kongphob asks if he can hold onto him, Arthit says no, and then he only smirks and shakes his head when Kongphob cheekily holds onto him anyway. (It's what they're into, don't kinkshame them.)

While talking about an upcoming meteor shower, Arthit's immediate reaction to Kongphob telling him they won't be able to see it in Bangkok is to earnestly suggest they take a trip to see one together.

And when Kongphob is absolutely delighted, this delights Arthit.

When Kongphob keeps up his "but I wanna see the meteor shower" bit, Arthit offers to take him to the planetarium.

At which point, Kongphob just goes in for the move he intended from the start:

This is why Arthit's reluctant to ever give in: there's no game of chicken Kongphob would ever lose at.

Then Arthit actually gets his own extremely rare Uno Reverse moment:

I fuckin' love this scene. Look at Kongphob's face. This is, like, the thousandth time he's envisioning their engagement, wedding, and honeymoon simultaneously.

(Did I have to go through that whole scene to prove any kind of point? NOPE. I just really like it. They're idiots. <3)

In another scene that I interpret as shortly following SOTUS and the start of their relationship, Kongphob hurts his foot and Arthit offers to carry him on his back. The way Kongphob looks up at him is like a knife in my heart; and then when Arthit actually follows through and carries him, he's so happy.

He also surprises Kongphob with a gift on Valentine's Day in the middle of campus in broad daylight. He finished his work early purely to see Kongphob. I think he's genuinely one of the most devoted boyfriends we see in all of Thai BL.

While they're at university together, Arthit's never closed off about their relationship. Everyone knows they're dating, and Arthit does not mind. (I mean, he was the first to approach Kongphob when Kongphob was visiting their university, after all. He also initiated their first kiss. Grabbed him by the tie, even.)

The thing is, Arthit is also shy. He's pretty well-established as an introvert who intellectually understands the SOTUS system, but he isn't naturally good with people, and it leads to all the issues with the system that we see in SOTUS. In his defense, though, we do find out that it was even worse when he was a first-year, and he is actively trying to do a better job. He's just, y'know, obsessed with 0062 and probably doesn't know anyone else's name. (I kid, but…do I though. Do you, Arthit. Speak up.)

In the main storyline of SOTUS S, though, Arthit is closed off. He does mind. He's afraid. So much more than he ever was before. And why?

Because he's left the world where he was known and respected and loved. That's the world Kongphob still lives in. When Arthit comes back to campus for the string-tying ceremony to support Kongphob, he's in Kongphob's safe space, not his. It isn't where Arthit belongs anymore, and it's clear from his body language that he knows it.

His new world, his new community, is at work. In sales. As an introvert. It's a department where he doesn't feel comfortable, one he actively wants to transfer out of. In this series, he's not an introvert in a position of power like he was in SOTUS; instead, he's an introvert on the bottom rung of a company. He came from a world where cogs are treasures that represent the heart to a world where cogs are cheap and replaceable because they're a dime a dozen.

This is why SOTUS S is mostly from Arthit's perspective: in SOTUS, Kongphob was the one in a new world figuring out his place there. By taking away Arthit's comfort zone, he's the one who has to confront his flaws and improve.

One of my favorite scenes is in episode one. Arthit is out to dinner with his new coworkers, and he's only given ONE opportunity to talk about his boyfriend naturally. His coworker asks indirectly if he has a significant other, and he's nervous but ready to say yes—and then just as he starts to speak, he's cut off, and the courage visibly drains out of him.

That's it. He's pressured himself back into the closet.

No one at that table said anything negative about queer people. No one gave him even a hint that they would be prejudiced against him, but he's in a new place and he's already so shy he's made faster friends with Bonus, the office fish. That's the flaw he has to overcome: he overthinks, and then he spirals. (He does it in Our Skyy too, which I love because fears often manifest in different ways, and it can take years to fully overcome them. Arthit does grow and change over time, but he's still inherently shy and anxious, and he's never framed by the narrative as in the wrong for that. He's only ever framed to be wrong for the harmful decisions he makes as a result of his fear.)

We saw him spiral in SOTUS when he admitted to Knot his fears about a potential future relationship with Kongphob. Kongphob absently mentioned his niece to Arthit one time and Arthit sent himself into a tailspin thinking he'd never be enough for Kongphob because they'd never be able to have biological kids so obviously Kongphob would resent him for it so why even start anything when their relationship would inevitably end in a fiery plane crash at the base of a smallish mountain in the Himalayas.

You can almost hear Arthit's mind working during that restaurant scene: he's new in a department he doesn't feel suited to, he's on the bottom rung, he doesn't understand certain office protocols that have already gotten him yelled at by a very senior supervisor, and his senior John is actively taking advantage of his kindness and politeness using the excuse of sharing the same alma mater (the memories of which Arthit loves and cherishes, and where he met the person he loves most). Now, because he didn't speak up when it was natural to, he feels he has to hide his relationship, too. And why not? What if they are bigoted? What if they do think less of him? What if he never gets a place in the production department? What if what if what if.

And that's on top of what Kongphob says to M at the start of the series: that they hardly see each other because of Arthit's job and Kongphob's hazing activities. We see in a shot that's framed through Kongphob's perspective that Arthit seems tired and disheartened even when he's with his friends after work. This is why I love the writing in SOTUS S: it's a Big Fish in a Small Pond Becomes Small Fish in a Big Ocean story. (His company is even called Ocean Electric, which is probably a coincidence but still amuses me. And again, he makes friends with a small fish in a bowl.)

It's also at its core a story about how an openly queer character loses their confidence when they enter the working world. And boy do I have experience with that, so this series hits a very deep chord for me.

Okay, back to SOTUS S. To Kongphob, specifically.

We're shown that Kongphob doesn't realize how much things between them are changing. He still lives in the safety of their university where he's head hazer, where Arthit was his boyfriend and a senior he and everyone else admired. Through no fault of his own, Kongphob probably can't conceive of Arthit feeling afraid the way he is.

When he shows up at Arthit's office, this is probably no different in his mind to meeting Arthit somewhere on campus after class. And thanks to the post-episode scenes of their past, we see how close they were before Arthit graduated, how much time they spent together. For Arthit to panic and tell him with annoyance, "You should have told me before you came here," it's no wonder Kongphob is taken aback and obviously hurt.

But because Arthit is still near the start of his character arc, Arthit won't tell him what he's feeling. I'd venture a guess that it's mostly pride. He's two years older than Kongphob, and while Arthit repeatedly makes the choice to use polite Thai pronouns with Kongphob that equalize them more and put them on more even ground with each other, he still feels responsible for him and their relationship. (It isn't made clear in the series, but the SOTUS S novel explains that the biggest part of why he's dismayed when he sees the portrait of Kongphob's family is that, again, he spirals and panics about their relationship potentially hurting Kongphob, who in Arthit's eyes now has much more to lose through bigotry than he does.)

Instead of confiding in Kongphob, Arthit asks for advance warning in the future. Not because he's afraid of being outed—his actual fear—but for practical reasons that don't sound unreasonable (he might be out or meeting with a client), so Kongphob accepts his explanation and doesn't question him.

The scene after this is crucial, because it shows that while Arthit's taken a hit in how he acts publicly, he's still devoted and affectionate privately. They have dinner together, Arthit gives Kongphob head hazer advice, accepts Kongphob's invitation to attend a hazer event and visibly just enjoys goofing off with him. Arthit adores Kongphob, and he shows him in his own way where he's comfortable.

And of course, Kongphob isn't perfect, either. He has his own communication issues, he oversteps Arthit's boundaries just like he did in SOTUS, and he considers everything thoroughly before he ever brings it up to Arthit. He's gone from an upstart first-year who questioned everything Arthit did, to the one who's holding their relationship together by taking on every obstacle for both of them, which ends in his emotional collapse later. He even refuses to cry in front of Arthit (in ALL THREE iterations of SOTUS).

That's what makes their relationship feel so authentic to me. They're both at fault by not talking about what's going wrong, and it's relatable and painful because we're shown that they're just trying to protect themselves and each other. In every iteration of SOTUS, Arthit's biggest fear is that their relationship will negatively affect Kongphob, and Kongphob's is…losing Arthit.

The problem has never been that Kongphob and Arthit don't love each other enough.

The problem is that both of them keep trying to take the lead from each other until their biggest fears bring out their worst flaws: Kongphob pushes, and Arthit runs.

It's why their resolution at the office party is so perfect, even if it had to give lethal doses of secondhand embarrassment to some members the audience. (Good job, Arthit, no one'll even remember the beach photo now.) This scene addresses both of their fears simultaneously, because they're intertwined: Arthit chooses to prioritize his relationship above all else, and by doing so, he proves to Kongphob that he won't lose him. He doesn't just apologize and say he'll do better: he takes a bat to the emergency glass and says, "There. Now we're public again."

And luckily Kongphob's, y'know. Very into that.

Arthit reclaims that confidence he had back in university in a scene that parallels the rooftop party in SOTUS, but now it's not just in front of their peers: it's before the world.

#kiranokira meta #sotus meta #sotus the series #kongart #kongarthit #krist perawat #singto prachaya #i always wanted to add more to the thread but twitter doesn't work like that #ahhhh i could talk about kongart all day i love them so much #sotus sotus sotus [cheerful chanting]

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wreckham · 19 days

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weird person: *vibing*

bitch: ew stop being weird, ew its so fucked up to be weird like that

weird person: no bc its not hurting anyone and it makes me happy

bitch: ew fuck you, ew go to therapy

weird person: i do. my therapist knows i'm weird and doesn't care on account of it not hurting anyone and making me happy

bitch: ew what the fuck, ew get a better therapist, ew what is wrong with everyone in todays society

weird person: okay look. i think maybe you're working under the assumption that any behavior you don't personally relate to is a symptom of some sort of problem, but it's not. there's no DSM entry for being bizarre in ways that cannot functionally cause harm to the self or to others. or perhaps it's just that you've been taught to view that which is transgressive as intrinsically harmful, annoying, or otherwise negative, but the fact is that human beings are strange, complex animals who drench everything in symbolism, including our most basic emotional needs, bc of our capacity for intrigue and creativity. in other words, we are all weirdos, we house weirdness inside our most basic, benign thoughts. i am no weirder then anyone else, i just don't hide it as most others do. and even if i was to be uniquely bizarre, that shouldn't be considered a moral failing until i choose to make it into one by enacting violence or causing damage, as in real damage that extends beyond mild discomfort from unrelated third parties who neither know nor regularly interact with me anyway. i would encourage you to seek compassion for the kinds of people you scoff at and write off as freaks as i fear this is the sort of reaction you have towards all other people who deviate from what you personally define as acceptable. i think it's genuinely, functionally, actually harmful for someone to be meanspirited towards what will inevitably be the majority of people who expose any vulnerabilities or deeply human experiences to them. please do not repeat this behavior with other people, and also uno reverse card maybe get a therapist of your own

bitch: ew no lol *commits a hate crime*

#beck yammers #jus finkin

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untitlednerd · 11 months

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Sore Loser

Bradley Bradshaw x reader, Jake Seresin x reader (platonic) drabble/one-shot

Warnings: none, other than the fact that there was no spelling or grammar checks.

Though short and sweet, I thought the last one was a little depressing - so here! Coming up with this scenario in my head was fun :)

“Draw four and change color to blue, my turn, skip you, and – four! I win!” You smiled innocently at Jake, as if you weren’t about to threaten him five minutes ago when you thought he was about to win.

The two of you were sitting and playing Uno while Bradley watched. At first, you asked who wanted to play, and though Jake thought that Bradley would be the one to volunteer right away, he actually volunteered Jake instead. And with a smirk, he accepted.

He was about to beat you, only having a yellow three and a red draw two left. Jake used the red draw two, and you got the cards you needed to win, and even though he drew a card after that, he still couldn’t go, which led you to make your winning move in the end.

“How the hell – you’re cheating!” Jake furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at you, only glancing at Bradley when he heard a snicker from the direction he was in. “What are you laughing at, Bradshaw?”

“Nothing, nothing. Just enjoying the fact that there’s finally a game you can’t win at.” With a proud grin on his face, he walked over to you, leaning down and kissing you on the head. “That’s the third time you two have played now, isn’t it? I thought you said the third time’s a charm?”

“No one ever said that four wasn’t a lucky number.” Jake grumbled – well, it was more of a pout – as he shuffled the deck of Uno cards, dealing you and himself seven each. Then, he laid one facing up, a green six. “Me first.” He said as he placed his first card down.

“As you wish, your highness.” You said with a small chuckle, putting a card down after him. Bradley was smiling as he stood behind your chair, the whole ordeal amusing him. All he knew is that he hoped you would win this round as well. He knew that if you didn’t, then Hangman would brag about beating you one time before it could even be pointed out that you beat him three other times first.

The fourth game actually went on longer than your first three. Ten minutes later and you had two cards while Jake had one. It was your turn, and the color was red, the number being four. Jake couldn’t go, and so he drew another card, and got a blue four, placing it down. When it was your turn again, you decided to sigh, acting as if he had you stumped. This resulted in a big grin on his face before you eventually placed down your blue reverse, and your blue two. You had never seen a grin fall so fast on Jake’s face in all of the time you had known him. But knowing that you caused that by finally beating him in a game made you smile. He was always one to brag about how good he was at games. Whether it was a sport, a board game, or even a game like tic tac toe. He always seemed to win. You decided that sometime you would have to challenge him at rock paper scissors, considering the fact that the game is purely based on statistics and chance, and not skill.

With a huff of annoyance mixed with pouting, Jake looked at you, and held his hand out for a handshake. You complied, and shook his hand. “Good game, Lieutenant.” You said with a small smile. Bradley was just grinning proudly in the background again.

“What now, Bradshaw?” Hangman questioned, looking up at him from where he sat.

“Oh, nothing still. I’m happy to see you lost again, especially considering the fact that she is as competitive as you – if not more. The difference is that she doesn’t mind losing. But she’s very adorable when she is happy about winning.” Bradley replied, leaning down and capturing your lips in a soft kiss while you were still grinning from your victory.

“And I thought being in planes almost daily would make me barf-” Jake gagged before shaking his head and standing up from the chair, heading to the front door.

“Leaving so soon? What, no five time’s a charm?” Bradley joked as he watched Hangman leave.

“Nope, but the idea of beating Coyote at darts is making me feel better already.” Jake said, tipping his non-existent hat to you as a goodbye before he left, closing the front door. Right as the door closed, Bradley let out a laugh.

“He is such a sore loser.”

“Do you want to play a round with me?” You asked, looking up at him.

“No-” He answered right away.

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want to lose.”

“Who’s the sore loser now?” You asked with a grin. Bradley only raised an eyebrow. “Uh Oh-” You said before getting up from your chair, and running out of the room, down the hall.

“Get back here!” You laughed as he chased you throughout the house, back and forth between different rooms.

“You’ll never catch me alive!” You ran into your shared bedroom, forgetting that there was only one way in and out. You looked like a deer in headlights when Bradley ran in, his arms folded with a smirk on his face as he looked over at you.

“Never say never, sweetheart.” He tackled you onto the bed, careful not to hurt you before he started tickling you, making you laugh. You sometimes hated how you were still ticklish, but Bradley loved it, especially when you had fun little moments like this.

“You win, you win! You’re not a sore loser!” After that, he finally stopped tickling you, leaning down to place a kiss on your cheek while using his fingers to brush through your hair, fixing it since tackling you messed it up a little. Not that he minded, but he knew you would. You laughed softly, your expression turning to relaxed as he did so. “Maybe next time, all of us should play. We could convince Nat and Bob to team up with us beforehand. If we convinced the others as well it would be suspicious.” You suggested, turning your head to look at him.

“I love your ideas, especially when they inevitably crush Hangman’s ego.” He replied with a proud smile before turning the TV on, the two of you deciding to relax for the rest of the day.

#bradley bradshaw top gun #bradley bradshaw fluff #bradley bradshaw fic #bradley bradsaw x reader #bradley bradshaw #rooster bradshaw fic #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster top gun #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin #I can just imagine the uno wars

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owlf45 · 13 days

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Was gonna leave this as a comment but wasn't sure you'd see it there SO I am putting it here (sorry if it's a bother)

I'm on ch3 right now and Izuku's first interaction with Sixth just hits me in the chest with hindsight like:

"Uno reverse card,” [sixth] drawls

Did Sixth whip this out on the spot or has he been talking like this the entire time, and just how much has Second been dying internally in the brief brief time he's know Sixth. What does Fifth make of it?

"But, to me, it's[representation: see] more than that. It always has been. It’s about looking around you [...] and seeing what the world has to offer. It’s about opening up your eyes, and taking the opportunity to open your arms wide and experience the life that takes place everywhere you look [...] It’s about what you can’t see, not physically—the possibilities for yourself, your future. It’s about seeing the potential that resides right in front of your nose, if only you can look down and see it and open yourself and grasp it. [...] it’s about your bonds, all the possible friendships and relationships—if only you open your eyes to see that they can exist.”

I'm 90% sure you've answered this before but this is what Sixth *wishes* it meant right? What he's going to make it mean on his second chance. Because knowing his backstory, he was the opposite of what he describes here and maybe he regrets it a bit. And maybe he's thinking about mistakes he doesn't want to make again, doesn't want izuku to make?

It makes me sad is all. He was just a kid. A kid who gave up his life and forgot he was allowed to be happy, and he missed the potential. I want to give him a hug

Sixth had been pretty quiet up until this point, barely talkative at all. So this is the first Second has heard him joke. Fifth mistakenly believes that perhaps, after his death, Sixth found his way with his own generation and maybe even befriended Nana.

I think what separates Sixth from Third (who doesn't understand how to fulfill his purpose) and Second (who understands his purpose shallowly, but refuses to examine its deeper meaning) and Fifth (who has always understood what his purpose is) is that Sixth's isn't something he's practiced his whole life, but it's the one he died with. You're on the nose that it's something that he regrets, it is something that he wants Izuku to stray from. But it's not like Sixth never practiced what he's preaching here. It's more that Sixth never got the opportunity to do more than just 'see'. Here, in this moment, he's not lying or wishing or hoping. He did see the world's possibilities. He did see what he was depriving of himself. He just ran out of time to do anything about it.

#my asks #imaginary #sweet (shay)berry

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koddyroddy · 4 months

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Funhouse Speculation on DFF

I love horror, and I absolutely love guessing who the unknown killers could be in a horror story. Dead Friend Forever is perfect for this type of diversion!!!

I have to share my wild speculations on this wonderful little show, even if I'm proven wrong later (that's part of the fun). Heeheeheeheehee.

I'll start my speculations assuming there's only human killers (for now).

Who is a killer? My guess at the Episode 4 mark--

Jin!!!!!!

(plus Top for obvious reasons)

Hear me out!

We are one third of the way through the series, and there's so much more story to tell. Per horror film tropes--the first third we often get red herrings (that may or may not end up being true).

First, let's deal with the two most suspicious characters.

Phi and Tan: Are they the killers? Options:

Phi and Tan are the killers, perhaps as revenge for Non's death and/or they are working with Non.

Phi and Tan are red herrings to make people think they are the killers when they just aren't.

(Variant of #2) Phi and Tan are not the killers, but they were friends with Non and wanted to learn about what happened to him. Still not the killers.

Phi and Tan are red herrings at first but one or both end up being one of the killers as a reverse uno later in the show. In this situation, at some point in the show's middle third it will be revealed that they are not the killers in some "decisive" way. The reverse uno comes in the last third with the final twist revealing No, He (They) Is (Are) the Killers!

At this point, they're just too obvious, so I'm skeptical of them as the killers. That said, Tan seems the more suspicious of the two.

Next, Por: Is he a victim or one of the killers? Thoughts:

In many horror films, one of the killers often ends up "dead" earlier in the story only to reveal themselves to be very much alive at the story's climax. I mean Por did basically impale himself on that tree branch. I admit the stomach wounds seem real, so who knows. The thing I'm looking for now is whether or not his body gets moved to an out-of-way place. If they move the body, then the chances of him being a killer increases. After all, he'd be able to freely move about if no one is watching his body.

Question though--who exactly would be his primary target? Hmmm.

On to Tee and Fluke: Killers or the primary targets? Thoughts:

These two are breaking under the pressure! They both seem more likely to become killers in the mania of the situation than to be the original killers. Tee seems like a primary target, if he actually was Non's main bully, but I'm not 100% sold on that.

For Fluke, it's interesting that this entire situation seems almost designed to push his buttons. That said, if Por is one of the killers, then Fluke would be the obvious accomplice. Who would be their primary target?

Now, let's discuss Top: Top, Top, Top. Thoughts:

I think he's faking the crazy.

Consider this--Top when he gets off the bike outside the house:

He looks pretty clearheaded to me. What's unclear is the state of his shirt. Speaking of...

The shirt doesn't look as green in the first picture as it does in the second when he's come into the house and is starting to "seizure." Plus he doesn't have the traces of green vomit on his face in the first picture (which is easier to see when you watch the show as opposed to looking at my crappy screenshot).

As I said--he's totally faking it.

Of course, I'm currently speculating on the killers being wholly human. All the supernatural stuff I'll save for another post. At this point, he's "killed" Por, so the question really becomes Who Is His Accomplice? Por and Fluke? Seems a little unlikely, but you never know. Also, if he's the first killer revealed, then he's not the mastermind.

Regarding his primary targets--hold on that.

At last, we have Jin and White: Final boys or the ultimate masterminds? Thoughts:

What a juxtaposition these two make. Honestly, it's hard to tell which is more suspicious.

With White, as the story progresses, he seems more and more like the final boy. BUT! Why would the killers target him? He wasn't a part of the original group who knew Non. Often in horror, the final girl/boy is someone that the killer saves to the end because they are the primary target. Why would anyone target White?

That said, the main person I can think of is Top. In the first episode, there was that joke about Top joining Tee and White in a threesome. Is there tension there that has yet to be revealed? Is White Top's primary target for taking Tee?

To flip it, is Top helping White get revenge for his--I don't know--big brother Non? I could totally see that. Maybe it's White that Top wants, and so he's helping him exact revenge. It is Top's freakout that lead to Tee freaking out, after all. I like White as the final boy more than him being a killer, so the question is who is the second (or third killer?) and who is he targeting?

Then we come to Jin.

At the beginning, Jin had more markings of being the final boy, but over time, he's proven to not be that helpful. I have no memory of him contributing anything positive to their situation. With his dislocated shoulder, he's now turned into a damsel in distress. There's potential backstory per the show's trailer that Jin liked Non. Could he secretly be the one planning revenge?

Also, so much of his story seems to revolve around Phi, almost as if they're trajectory is separate from everyone else's. With so much more story to tell (two thirds of the show!), I wonder how they're return to the group will go.

With horror tropes in mind, Jin seems the least likely candidate, which is why he's the most suspicious to me right now. This is totally just gut feeling, with barely any logic around it. I fully admit it.

But wait, what about Non? I need more information. He could be the red herring.

...

I have many more thoughts as I speculate away, so I'll likely post further once I collect them. There's a lot to think about regarding the supernatural aspects (are we going to get a Blair Witch ending?) and the sexual dynamics (are we going to get a Captivity ending!?!?). Now that's a thought.

#dead friend forever #dff #dff the series #be on cloud

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