#when I get my own tower I am going to just have a teleportation circle on each floor

[rokacat]

Gleefully running to show my master that I learned a new spell but his tower is too tall and I get tired and have to sit on the steps and catch my breath halfway up

#wizards #wizardposting #wizardblr #when I get my own tower I am going to just have a teleportation circle on each floor #nobody needs this many stairs #he wasn’t even that impressed #it was a really cool spell you guys

[kazuhasbunny]

SORRY FOR .... POSSIBLY BAD WRITING English is not my first language and I am definitely not a writer 😭 I originally wrote this on my phone before going back one more time to revise and post it because I don’t have a beta or whatever LOL I just was thinking a bit too much about Foul Legacy ig 💔 I am sorry for destroying ur inbox with the horniest thing I’ve ever written it’s 6 am I have not slept in a day I’m gonna pass tf out now

There’s no said “yes” so ? Dubcon maybe ? Monsterfucking ofc but otherwise I’m not sure LMAO

Ah, Monday. Same as always, Childe invites you to the Golden House to battle...how many weeks in a row have you two been doing this? Who knows.

You swore, the more times you saw him, the more times you just wanted to slap him. He was a flirtatious annoying prick who had a boner for battle.

You teleported to the Golden House for what felt like 500th time in your life, and stood tentatively at the door before inhaling sharply and slamming the large doors open to greet the red-haired piece of shit named Childe. He stood against a pillar, admiring his own weapons carefully before looking up at you with a shit-eating grin. It made your blood boil.

Wait.

This...felt different. Your body was warm but not in a rage-filled way...no. Were you attracted to him? No. No. Never. A Fatui Harbinger? You’re out of your mind.

Childe yawned and stretched his back before bouncing off the pillar with his bow in hand. He tilted his head and reached his hand out playfully.

“We duel again.” He speaks, his voice echoing through the otherwise silent Golden House. You said nothing, tightening your grip on your weapon before dashing toward him, sword drawn, to swing a blow at his head. The man dodged swiftly, circling around you to push you over and slam you to the ground. He slammed his weapon beside your head to keep you in place. He had his knee on your stomach to completely constrict you as well.

Shit.

He chuckled, “Is that all you got? Are you going easy on me, dear? I know you can do better than that.” He teased, pushing his knee farther into your stomach, causing you to take in a sharp inhale. You reached out to grab your weapon before Childe used his Hydro abilities to throw your sword across the room. You slapped the man in the face, hard enough to cause him to slightly spit out blood. He stayed silent for a second before...smirking. He laughed again, shoving your hands above your head to further pin you to the ground, “are you distracted? Has my charm gotten to you~?” He tried to flirt. All it did was make you to want to punch the shit out of him, and he knew that, “cute.” He mumbled.

You scoffed, spitting at him. He stayed silent again, not before shoving his leg between your legs, “now now, don’t think I never noticed how red your face was when you stumbled in here.” The ginger smirked again, licking his lips. Childe leaned down to lick a wet stripe up your neck to the shell of your ear, before kissing your cheek softly, gazing into your eyes with his dangerous blue ones.

He continued to kiss and lick at your neck for a while. He slowly slid his hand down your body, tugging at your shirt to remove the piece of clothing from your body. He teased you relentlessly before he *finally* tore your top off to move his head off your neck so he could kiss and lick at your collarbone and chest instead. Childe ever so slowly moved from your collarbone to your abdomen, making sure to touch every single part of you. He wanted to make sure you know who you belong to, after all.

He grabbed your belt and quickly undid it, almost quite literally tearing your pants and underwear off. He looked up at you with pleading eyes...it was almost cute. You couldn’t seem to pull yourself together, he just kept teasing your body ever so carefully, kissing and nipping at your inner thighs, making sure to get so close to your sex to make you shiver, but never actually do anything to it.

He wants you to beg.

And so you did. This was getting too much for you, and you began to beg the man under you to touch you. He smiled at your pathetic pleads, making direct eye contact with you as he began to lick your hole, his soft wet tongue dipping in and out of you. He was fucking you with his tongue...this was not the plan. One by one, he began to add his fingers along with his tongue to your hole, stretching you nice and wide for him. You felt an orgasm coming up, and it seems Tartaglia felt it too. He stopped in his tracks once you began to tighten up, removing his fingers and his tongue from you...only for him to tower over you, unzipping his pants slowly to release his dick from his pants. He wasn’t huge, but he wasn’t small. He stroked himself a few times before quickly bottoming out completely into you without warning, causing you to gasp for air at the sudden intrusion. Tartaglia stopped for a second, but soon after began a rough, quick pace. He didn’t like to start slow, apparently. He didn’t care, he wanted to fuck you, and you were his hole to fuck at the moment. His pace was aggressive and rough, slamming into your g-spot every single thrust, due to the sheer power of his thrusts. His moans were almost...cute. Little whines and grunts every time he thrust in and out of you. The two of you felt your orgasms arriving, and he somehow began moving even faster before the two of you came at the same time, his warm seed filling your hole and coating your insides. You were both panting...but Childe wouldn’t pull out. He smirked before a low growl formed in his throat. You watched in disbelief as the Harbinger’s body practically doubled in size, his body covered in a robotic armor and his face concealed by a ‘mask’. You felt his dick get bigger too...a LOT bigger. You screamed at the feeling of the huge length inside of you, his dick was well over a foot long like this, and your body couldn’t take it. Foul Legacy.

Foul Legacy growled, LOUD, into your ear before he began moving again. Your eyes rolled back, and you could see and feel the obvious bulge in your stomach from the sheer size of Tartaglia in this form. Foul Legacy opened its ‘mouth’ to reveal a long, black, thick tongue. His tongue was uncomfortably slimy, but he shoved it down your throat anyways. He was thrusting into your mouth with his tongue...and with his cock. He was spitroasting you. Your vision went completely white as you came all over him again, probably the biggest orgasm you’ve ever had in your life...but he kept going. Foul Legacy was relentless like this. He kept thrusting and thrusting, abusing your prostate with his fat cock before he released again inside of you, this time cumming so much it drips and pools out of you onto the floor. He removed his tongue from your mouth and put you back down onto the hard, steel floor of the Golden House. He pulled his dick out of you and shifted back into the Childe you normally knew. Your head was dizzy, and your legs hurt like hell...you sure as fuck were not walking any time soon.

The taller man lay beside you, grabbing your chin to bring you closer to him, and he whispered.

“I win.”

- Foul Legacy Anon 💔

why is there liquid dripping down my legs

#eli.replies #eli.thirsts #foul legacy anon #👀.foul legacy #tw : monsterfucking #this made me

[poesparakeet-fics]

Read it here or on AO3!

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Critical Role (Web Series) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast, Beauregard Lionett & Caleb Widogast, The Mighty Nein & Caleb Widogast Characters: Caleb Widogast, Essek Thelyss, Beauregard Lionett, Jester Lavorre, Caduceus Clay Additional Tags: Shadogast - Freeform, dunamancy, Empire Siblings - Freeform, Prank Wars, Tickling, rib tickling Summary:

What happens to a ticklish wizard when he manages to piss off too many of the people who love him? Allies are made and lessons are learned.

FIC

“Caleb Widogast!” Caleb jumped as he walked into the kitchen of the Xorhaus, unsure of what he could have possibly done to upset anyone this early in the morning. He was even more surprised when he saw who. “Essek?” Caleb stammered, taken aback. The drow was perched on a large kitchen chair with a cup of Caduceus’ tea in his hands and a pinched look on his face. “Schatze, I’m sorry, were we to meet? I hope you weren’t waiting long, I--” “No.” Essek corrected him sharply. “I am here to have tea with Mr. Clay at his request, to discuss the situation in Savalierwood. But he just told me that he healed some pretty distinct injuries for you, yesterday?” Caleb felt a guilty cringe fold his stomach in half. He sighed, looking at Caduceus. “So that just came up, ja?” “Yeah,” Caduceus responded, “thought it might be why you slept in.” “Ja, I had a bit of a fall--” “A fall? From where?” Essek’s gaze was intense. Caleb dropped his eyes to the floor. “Oh just, you know, clumsy--” “Really? You clumsily practiced dunamantic phasing on your own and fell through the floor?” “I think it was three floors, actually…” Caduceus mused quietly. The cringe came to the surface and showed, unbidden on Caleb’s face. “Essek, I--” “I have never limited you. It was the one thing I asked.” “I know, I--” “Caleb.” He froze when Essek cut him off, meeting the elf’s gaze once more. Essek stared him down hard before continuing. “I had… better masters than you had, when I was a young wizard. Infinitely gentler, certainly. But they would have whipped me for practicing phasing magic by myself. Truly. You could have cut yourself in half, dismembered yourself, crushed yourself, suffocated in a wall--” Essek seemed to cut himself off with a wave of his hand. “The point… the point is it would cause me a great heartbreak if irresponsible use of the magic I taught you led to your demise. Please promise me again, and keep it this time.” Caleb ducked his head, feeling like a rightfully scolded school child. “I will, ja. I am sorry.” Essek gave him a look that said he didn't entirely believe him. “I do trust you. I do not trust your curiosity. It’s only a virtue if it doesn’t get you killed.” Caleb laughed softly, nodding as he sat down at the table with them and accepted a teacup from the still-silent Caduceus. He winked at Essek. “I think I could say the same to you, but fair enough. If I do it again, I’ll let you whip me.” Essek smiled back, but the doubt didn’t leave his expression. ... “CALEB!” Beau’s voice thundered from upstairs, and Caduceus almost dropped the knife he was using to prepare vegetables for dinner. He spun around to see the wizard in question with his hands in his component pouch, running as fast as he could through the kitchen and out the back door. Beau’s quick steps followed, but by the time she was in the kitchen they could both hear the familiar woosh of a misty step from outside. She stopped stock-still in the kitchen, hands clenched into fists, looking… different than Caduceus had ever seen her. What was it? “Uh… hey. Did you get some new clothes.?” Beau turned to him silently, eyes burning holes in his head. It was pretty scary, actually. “Oh! Uh… is that what this is about?” Beau’s clothes were bright magenta where they had once been her usual cobalt blue. She was still staring at Caduceus with her fists clenched. Veth and Fjord were creeping wearily into the kitchen behind her. “I think it looks nice--!” Veth offered, only to choke off in a scared squeak when Beau rounded to face her. Beau reached out to yank Fjord’s hat off his head and put it on. “Hey!’ Fjord protested, before clamping one hand over his mouth to hide a smile. “Oh. I see.” As it perched on Beau’s head, the hat instantly turned the same bright magenta of her robes. When she handed it back it returned to its usual color. The whole room was biting lips to keep an amused smile off their face, lest they become the new target for her fury. Beau took a deep breath before bellowing again. “CALEB!” She spoke into the air, her voice loud enough to hear throughout the house. “I KNOW THAT SPELL DOESN’T GO FAR. I KNOW YOU’RE HERE, AND I AM GOING TO FUCKING GET YOU, DO YOU HEAR ME? I AM GOING TO DO DOPE MONK SHIT TO YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM, TIE YOU UP AND FEED YOU TO A ROOM FULL OF TIEFLINGS. You will FUCKING SUFFER! THINK OF A NEW NAME, CAUSE CALEB WIDOGAST IS A FUCKING DEAD MAN! ” At the end of her tirade Beau took a deep breath and started to walk upstairs again, but not before spinning around and jabbing a finger at everyone in the kitchen. “ANYONE caught harboring the wizard will share his fucking fate!” … "...CALEB WIDOGAST IS A FUCKING DEAD MAN! ” Caleb was sitting cross-legged on the floor of his hiding place in Fjord’s empty bedroom when Beau finished her threats, but by the time she was climbing the stairs again he had disappeared with a crackling pop. When the disorienting suck of the teleport spell faded he was standing on a clay path in a dimly-lit garden next to a trio of small towers made of iridescent grey brick. An arcane weather-vane creaked in the darkness. He started toward the door. “Caleb?” A head of pale curls popped up over the top of a bush of dark purple flowers, a frown of concern on the face beneath. “Essek, hello. Ah… may I spend the night?” Essek walked toward him as he pulled floral gardening gloves off of his hands, eyes narrowed wearily. “Of course, I am always happy to have you...” He reached Caleb and placed a distracted kiss on his cheek. “... did something happen at home?” “Yes.” Caleb answered, only to stutter as Essek’s worry grew, “Oh, ah, nothing bad. Well, nothing very bad. I just need to avoid Beauregard for a bit.” Essek’s worry immediately evaporated to be replaced with amused annoyance. “I see. What did you do this time?” They both started to stroll through the garden toward Essek’s back door. “Oh, just some illusion work. It will go away by morning. She deserves it, after stealing my spellbook while I was sleeping.” “Mhmm.” Essek hummed, linking his arm with Caleb’s. “But wasn’t her stealing your spellbook revenge for…” “The magic spiders, ja, but I had to do that! She--” “--the disappearing ink, yes, I remember. Are you sensing a pattern here, chathtiu?” Caleb sniffed and turned his nose up. “I have no idea what you mean.” Essek’s smile turned indulgent as he pulled Caleb into his home. “I’m sure you don’t. Beauregard does have a way of pushing your buttons, hm?” “She is the expert.” “I should ask her for advice, one of these days.” Caleb only laughed, pulling the smaller man into his arms. “You have your own way of pushing my buttons, don’t you schatz?” Essek smiled back. “You’re right, of course. I do.” ... Caleb stalked through the library of the Xorhause, circling it room by room. While his books were sitting on the desk he’d been working at the night before, their holsters were missing. He shifted the papers on his desk, panic rising in his chest. Where were they? “Caleb?” Jester was standing in the doorway, his holsters dangling from one finger. Caleb let out a sigh of relief. “Jester! Danke! Where were they?” “Sorry, I think Sprinkle must have stolen them.” Caleb shook his head, the tension in his chest easing. “That’s alright. I’m just glad they are found.” He reached out for them, stopping short when another figure entered the room. It was Beau, her clothes now back to their normal deep blue. Their eyes met for a moment, but the monk just breezed past as though she didn’t even notice Caleb was there. It had been a week since the incident with her clothes with no revenge or further threats, and Caleb was starting to wonder if he’d finally won the war. He shrugged his holsters on as the two women sat down on the sofa. He missed Jester’s giggle until it was too late. “Hey Caleb?” Beau asked. “Uh, ja?” Caleb cringed a little, turning around. Beau’s look was positively predatory. “Fuck you.” Caleb was about to respond when the sensation of fingers digging into his ribs flushed all the air out of him in one squeal. He spun around clumsily, hands flapping, but nobody was near him. He craned his neck to look down, his arms helplessly hugging his own ribcage while his knees buckled. That’s when he realized where the sensation was coming from. “Wh-what? No, I-- ah! Please!” His fingers fumbled with the buckle of his holsters to try and escape the traitorous leather trap, but the buckle was trapped under a magical seal of iridescent purple wax with the image of a skeleton key pressed into its surface. “Fuck!” Beaureguard was grinning like a gnoll. “What’s that buddy? Fuck you?” “Aah!” Caleb’s whole body convulsed and hit the carpet as the tickling escalated, even more invisible fingers reaching out from the leather to stroke delicate bones under pale skin and plain cloth. “No no! Please!” “Can I try?” Jester asked, giggling. “Nein!” “Sure, go for it.” “Fuck yooooou Caleb!” Caleb couldn’t answer her with words, he could only wail wordlessly. He writhed on the ground, trying desperately to resist the currently useless instinct to lock his arms at his sides so he could try and pull the holsters off over his head, but it was no use. All he could do was paw uselessly at the leather before Beureguard hissed the trigger word again and all he could see was stars. “Uh… everything alright in here?” Fjord’s voice came from the direction of the door. Caleb couldn’t see him over the sofa. “Fjord!” Caleb screeched. “Plea-hee-se! Evil!” It was all he could get out before his voice cracked and his laughter turned silent, his head thrown back against the carpet. “Huh?” Beau answered in an exaggeratedly casual tone. “Yeah, everything’s fine. Just getting a little payback for my pink phase. Stole his holsters and Essek cursed ‘em.” A wave of betrayal strong enough to overpower his ticklishness gave Caleb just enough breath to shout “WHAT?!” before the laughter overtook him again, tears building in his eyes. “I helped with the ruse!” Jester piped up. “Uh-huh.” Fjord nodded, “can he breathe?” “Hmm? Oh, I guess we can check. Good boy, Caleb.” The sensation stopped all at once, and Caleb rolled flat on his back to gulp in air. “See? He’s fine.” Caleb sat up, hands held out in supplication even as he struggled to catch his breath. “Beau, please, I’m s-” “Fuck you and your apology.” Any strength Caleb had recovered melted away as he squealed and flopped back down on the carpet, limbs curling uselessly against his body. The tickling fingers coming from the inner panels of his holsters might as well have been sucking his very life-force out. Fjord lets out a sigh. “If you’re going to torture him for a prank, you at least have to let him apologise. Good boy?” Caleb didn’t get up this time, too scared to trigger someone’s wrath or sense of mischief. He was still giggling, partially from phantom sensation and partially from the panicky tension of knowing that any of them could trigger the curse at any moment. “I’m sorry! Bitte!” There was a beat of silence before Beau turned to Fjord again. “There, I let him apologise. Can we go back to the torture now?” “Wait!” Caleb squeaked, rising unsteadily to his knees. “Please Beau, we can talk about this--” “Oh, you wanna talk now? Cause when it happened you were happy to teleport away to your fucking boyfriend’s. So… you know,” she finished with a grin, “fuck you, fuck you, FUCK YOU.” “Nein!” Was all Caleb could manage before his laughter stole his voice away, only to crack and go silent once more a moment later. Tears leaked from his eyes to roll into the fluffy carpet beneath him as he crumpled. “Oh, he’s so cute when he cries, I love it!” Jester clapped her hands while she watched from the sofa. “This is the best curse ever.” Fjord made an agreeable sound. “I wonder if Essek could make something more remote? Then we could tickle him wherever we are. That would be fun.” Caleb couldn’t respond to the idea with anything more than pained wail through his hysterics. The others pretended not to notice. “Yeah, I do worry that he goes without when we’re gone.” Jester cooed. “Pfft. Yeah, I don’t think Essek is letting that happen.” Beau snorted. Caleb started to beat at the floor with one hand, hiccups punctuating his laughter. “Aw, alright. Good boy.” The sensation stopped again, but Caleb couldn’t stop his laughter. “Please, pleaheese, *hic* bitte--” “Focus on catching your breath.” Fjord suggested, “It’ll do you more good than begging will.” Caleb let out an exhausted little sob before obeying, his lungs working overtime to suck in air. He wiped the tears from his eyes and tried to make the hiccups go away with little success. When his breathing finally evened out Fjord gave him a reassuring smile. “See, that’s better.” Fjord soothed. Beau’s grin got wider. “Hey, Caleb?” “No!” “Fffffffffff…” “Mercy!” “...uuuuck you!” “Aaii!” Caleb let out a little yelp at the sound of the words, then… nothing. He’d clenched his eyes shut in anticipation, and when he slowly opened them Beau was glaring at him. “Hey! How come it didn’t work?” Caleb let out a huge sigh of relief. The curse must have expended all of its energy. “Is it done?” Jester questioned. Caleb was wondering the same thing. He tried to examine the buckle of his holsters as subtly as possible. The seal was still there, which meant whatever the curse was, it was not over. He needed to get out of earshot as quickly as he could. “I thought it was supposed to last longer than that. Can you message Essek?” “Sure!” Caleb started to cast for misty step as subtly as he could, hoping he was close enough to his lab to lock himself inside. “Hi Essek, it’s Jester! So, your awesome curse thingy is SO great, but like, but it ran out of tickles? Do you know why?” Whoosh. Caleb hit the stone floor of his lab with an oof, dragging himself to his feet and transmuting the door of the lab into stone for good measure. As he groaned he saw that the room looked quite different compared to how he had left it the night before. The large chalkboard he used for calculations had been moved into the centre of the room. In one corner someone had drawn a symbol-- a skeleton key, like the one on the seal trapping him in his holsters. Next to it someone had written in familiar, looping script: I will not practice phasing unsupervised. X100 Caleb whipped out the enchanted little book he and Essek used to send messages between them, only to find a new one waiting for him. You have 30 minutes. Caleb was glad nobody was there to watch him gape like a fish between the chalkboard and the book. Essek couldn’t be serious. He frowned and grabbed up a quill. You are a traitorous snake! There was only a single silent moment before the page shimmered and revealed another message under Caleb’s. Noted. Now you only have 25 minutes. Caleb took a moment to say every curse word in every language he knew. Then he stood up, snatched the chalk and started writing.

#caleb widogast #essek thelyss #Shadogast #Tickling #Tickle Fic #Critickle Role #beauregard lionett #Empire Siblings #Prank wars #Rib tickling #Ticklish Wizards #hot boi essek #TK fic

[anonymousfiction211]

I will make you a deal

Summary:

You are training to become an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., but are secretly afraid to go on missions. Loki who moves into the Avenger tower notices and makes you a deal.

Warning:

Swearing, smut, dub con

Word count:

2.193 words

You were training to become an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. who would also be a member of the Avengers. It still felt a little surreal to be living in the Avenger Towers. The training, while being extremely hard and tough, went well. You were not ready to go on missions yet, but you did not mind. The thought of going out there, after hearing some of the stories from the other Avengers, terrified you. You did not tell the rest of the team, because you were scared that they will replace you with another agent. You were determined to��get over your fear eventually. You just did not know how.

It did not help when Thor brought his brother to join the team last month. Loki was supposed to pay his debt for attacking the city of New York by joining the Avengers. How Fury ever agreed to this arrangement was beyond you. You were not with the team when the attacked happened, but heard all the stories, which fuelled your fear. You remembered when Thor introduced his brother Loki to you. ‘I’m not your brother’ was the only thing he said. And it broke your heart a little when you saw the sad expression on Thor’s face. So, when Thor told you that Loki’s room would be across yours, you wanted to protest but did not have the heart to make the situation worse for him. While you were scared by Loki’s presence because of him being well.. him, you also thought he was quite handsome. He had a certain grace and finesse. And especially his eye colour and intense gaze have had you in a trance the first time he looked at you. It was not something you would have expected from a god who tried to take over the world.

When you broke away from his eyes and slightly inappropriate thoughts you decided the best thing to do was to avoid him as much as you could. You had to overcome one fear at the time. If someone found out you feared him, they might conclude that you would be scared to go on missions too and kick you out. So, for the next weeks you snuck out your room as quietly as possible and made sure you went to bed after Loki was already his room. To prevent you accidently bumping into him in the hall. It was not that difficult, because he was in his own room most of the time. If you were forced to be in the same room as him, for a team meeting, you could not help but to admire his figure. You thought about what a man, a god actually, like that could do to you. But after staring too long he always looked at you with such an intense gaze that your fear won and made you freeze in place or leave as fast as you could. You never exchanged a word with him, and it was not your intention to do that any time soon.

When you could not sleep thinking how to be less afraid, you decided to get up and get a glass of water. When you were almost in the kitchen you heard something break. With caution you looked inside to see what was happening. You saw Loki who is back was to you fixing the broken glass with his magic. Without turning around, you heard his deep voice: ‘And wat are you doing out of bed at this hour of the night?’ You felt a shiver run down your spine. He turned around and looked at you with his green eyes that almost seem to glow in the dark. Your thoughts were racing inside your head and you realized you soon had to answer something. ‘I- I was just getting a glass of water w-when I heard something break. But I am not thirsty anymore so, g-good night!’ Leaving as fast as possible was the best thing to do in this situation, you thought.

But after leaving the kitchen Loki grabbed your arm and spun you around. You were with you back against the walls of the hall, he had your hands pinned above your head with one hand. Your wanted was to scream, but before you could make a sound another large hand was covering your mouth. Loki looked at you and you froze. ‘Are you really that afraid of everything or just me?’. You saw the smirk on his face. He removed his hand from your mouth. Your heart started racing and you were trying to think of a way out of this situation. You were terrified but being so close to the handsome god did turn you on a little. You felt Loki’s breath against your ear, and he whispered: ‘Why would you want to get out of this situation when I can help you with both of your problems?’ You just stared at him, your mind had gone blank and you did not know what to say.

The thought hit you. He had been reading your mind this entire time and knew all about your fears. Worse, also all your inappropriate thoughts about him. ‘How long have you been reading my mind?’ You almost did not recognize your own voice, it sounded weak. ‘From the moment we met, and you decided it was best to avoid me’. You tried to push him off so you could run to your room and lock the door, but he had you pinned down hard. Then you heard him chuckle: ‘Such a scared girl. Don’t you want to know how I can help you, little one?’ With no way out you decided it was better to ask. ‘How?’ He crashed his lips against yours and you froze again, you did not expect him to kiss you. When you felt his tongue wanting to enter your mouth you let him. You felt him press his body closer to yours and a moan escaped from your mouth. This spurred him on as he began to kiss you more dominantly. He left your lips and kissed your neck and occasionally biting hard enough to leave a mark.

Your head was racing, and you began to breath faster. You could not hold back some of the moans and heard Loki chuckle at the sounds you made because of him. He then let go of your hands and lifted you up, so your legs were around his waist and his hands were supporting your butt. This time desire won, and you started to kiss him back while he was carrying you to his room. He closed the door behind him and threw you on his bed. You gasped as Loki ripped your shirt, unclipped your bra and took one of your already hardened nipples in his mouth. His tongue felt like nothing you ever felt before. You felt yourself grow wetter. Loki began to move down slowly, while his tongue traced your body and left goosebumps. He pulled down your pyjama bottoms and hummed in approval when he saw your thong. He undid that with his teeth, while his intense gaze never left your eyes. The eye contact alone could have had you cum right then and there.

He started to kiss your inner thighs as moans escaped your mouth. You felt his breath against your pussy. He did not do a thing and it was driving you crazy. You saw the smirk on his face, he had you where he wanted. ‘Still scared or are you going to let me help you with both your fears and desire?’ You then realized that this was Loki. The guy who could kill you with a snap of his finger. Your mind went blank. You could not quite remember how you got here. When you did not answer you felt his tongue slide against your fold, and you whimpered. ‘Answer me!’ he growled. The tone in his voice was so dominant it sends a strange sensation right to your core. ‘P- please Loki’ was all you could manage to say. He then circled his tongue around your clit. ‘Mm.. so scared, yet so wet for me and I’ve barely touched you’ he chuckled. You felt a finger slide inside hitting just the right spot. You arched your back while Loki’s tongue kept circling your clit. He was relentless in his attack and added another finger. He was pumping in and out of you faster and you felt your orgasm building up. ‘You want to cum, don’t you?’ All you could say was ‘Yes, Loki, oh my god yes!’. There was nothing you wanted more right now. But right before you could he stopped and pulled his fingers away. You whimpered at the empty feeling inside of you.

‘Stop your whimpering, I’m not done with you yet’ he said. He stood next to the bed and you sat up. You looked at him, confused why he would stop. Just before you could ask him that he spoke. ‘You’re not just scared of me, you’re also scared to go on missions and fear that if the rest find out, they will kick you off the team’. You wanted to deny it, but he was the god of lies and reading your mind for the past month. All you did was nod. He grinned ‘Good, I will make you a deal’. He stroked your hair, shimmered his clothes away so he was standing naked before you. You were waiting for him to speak again while gazing at his body. But he did not say anything. He grabbed your hair and forced your head to be in front of his cock. ‘But first be a good girl for me and suck it’. You immediately obeyed and took his cock as far in your mouth as you could. You began to bop your head up and down, slowly. You heard Loki beginning to moan. Feeling a little bolder you decided to go a little faster and tease him by sliding your tongue over his tip. He growled and pushed his cock so far down your throat you almost chocked. ‘You like that, don’t you? You like the feeling of my cock against the back of your throat. And you take it so well’. All you could do is moan while you pussy was aching to be filled by him.

He pushed you back on the bed. ‘Spread your legs’. His voice was so low that it was almost animalistic. He crawled on top of you and without warning pushed his cock inside of you. ‘Hmm.. so tight’ he hummed. He did not give you much time to adjust to his length. As he started pumping almost immediately. The sensation of being filled up by Loki was incredible. He truly was a god you thought. He moved his head closer to yours and whispered ‘Now the deal.. I can protect you on missions. Even if I am not on them, if you are ever in danger, I will teleport to you and kill everyone around you so fast, you would miss it if you blinked your eyes’ he grunted. He was pumping in and out of you faster and faster. You felt your orgasm build while you were trying to concentrate on what he said. ‘W- what do y-you want in return?’ your voice trembled. ‘In return you will give yourself to me whenever I please, to do whatever I want with you. Like let me let me fuck you until I am satisfied, and by your reaction this night I can guarantee that you will like it’. He started pumping faster hitting all the right spots. Your mind was racing, and you could not think straight. ‘Now if you will accept, I will let you cum, little one, so do we have a deal?’. Your need to cum was so high you answered immediately ‘Yes, yes Loki I’ll accept’. He put his thumb on your clit drawing circles which send you over the edge. Your orgasm hit you and your legs begin to shake. With a few more pumps you heard Loki growl and felt him cum inside of you.

He laid on top of you for a moment, before pulling out. You moaned at the feeling and heard him chuckle. He grabbed a towel and cleaned himself and you. You sat on his bed, watching him put on his underwear, thinking how you should act now. You did not fear him as much as you did earlier but did not want to anger him either. He must have read your mind again, because right when you decided to grab what was left of your clothes and leave, he shimmered your underwear and one of his shirts and gave them to you. He went to lay in his bed and once you were dressed, he pulled you in a tight embrace. ‘Now get some sleep little one, you’re mine now and I’ll protect what’s mine’. You strangely felt safe in his arms and cuddled him more closely while he kissed the top of your head. Sleep came easily that night.

Click here for chapter 2

#loki x you #loki #loki smut #loki laufeyson #loki odinson #loki x reader #loki mcu

[judyhopps934-mt-zd]

Thoughts on Gang of Secrets

Warning: Spoilers and intense emotions. Have fun!

Chat Noit sensed that something is wrong with Ladybug. Love how he can sense that based on what she doesn't say.

She almost didn't pound it and was distracted to do so. Oh boy.

BOIIII WHY DID YOU TAKE HER TO THE MOVIES???? THIS IS NOT THE TIME!!! AND LADYBUG KNOWS THIS AS SHOWN BY HER FACIAL EXPRESSION!!! I am SCREAMING because he took her to a movie ABOUT ROMANCE!!!

The civilians do not mind that superheroes are going to the movies. That is until...

Ladybug goes into this rant about romcoms and I agree with every word she says. There is no such thing as a happy ever after and things do not go perfectly. Go off Ladybug!!! There's a reason why I hate rom coms.

The civilians being shocked/annoyed from her rant just adds to it. I am guessing because this is literally freaking Paris and considering the couples there. Has the same vibes as Grunkle Stan from Gravity Falls when he approached a couple to say marriage is terrible in the second episode.

Hurts that the rant was the reflection of Marinette's dilemma.

Chat finds out that it was about heartbreak. He finally picks up about social cues! Good work Chat! Too bad that you learned that after your breakup with Kagami.

Ah, the swimming pool. A great place to go to forget your heartbreak go for a swim.

Realized that akumas cannot attack people if they are submerged under water, which is why she goes to the pool and a theory roaming online that she goes to the pool to cry makes a lot of sense.

I know this is a kids show and that logic gets thrown out the window, but does no one in Paris find it fishy that Ladybug in her swim suit enters the Dupain-Cheng household???? I feel like no one cares.

Ladybug might say that the board of pictures with Adrien and Luka and some of her friends might not bother her, but it seems to bother her somewhat as it is a reminder of the relationships that she can't have as long as she's Ladybug. It hurts badly though.

Unpopular opinion: The Kwamis can be good at providing comfort and probably make them laugh, but they are not the best therapists. Do not blame them though.

Marinette only detransforms for Tikki's wellbeing. She is at that point where the only reason she does something is because someone else is suffering, not for herself. It hurts seeing her suffer like this.

Tikki is fine despite being in the earrings for a long time. She is more concerned about Marinette though.

Meanwhile, the girls have their suspicions about Marinette as they did not know about her breakup with Luka until he told Juleka, which started a chain that I cannot remember, but do remember that it ended with Alya.

They call Marinette, but she does not answer because what will she tell them? The not answering part is a mood, but the reason hurts.

Alix being like "why not get orange juice with her and talk about her feelings" and everyone else staring at her as if she was the one with a crazy idea. I can't! Especially when she was like "*sigh* fine"

Also, Luka is not taking the breakup well either if Juleka's photo is anything to go by.

The bracelet idea is cute. I did something similar to that Junior year.

The scene from the ad that made us mad: Marinette transforming angrily after saying how her life as Marinette is complicated and prefers to be Ladybug all the time. It hurts to see this scene actually be in the 3rd episode as the guardianship and the breakup had consumed her so quickly.

Baby girl, we love you and we know as the audience how hard your life is now. This is why we are very concerned about you challenging ShadowMoth. Concerning.

But she breathes and goes back inside. Glad that you blew off some steam, but is everyone in Paris not aware that this just happened?!?!? Hello!?!?!?! Like Plagg said: People are blind. And a good thing too.

Just as this was happening, the girls come barging in. Good that they are great friends for being concerned, but have they ever heard of knocking?

Rose finds the dollhouse. Its a nice dollhouse, but isn't that too obvious that it will attract other people's attention? Not judging though, its a nice dollhouse and shows the expansion of Marinette's craft.

Originally, I thought they were coming after Marinette because of what happened in the episode "Ladybug", but glad to know her other friends cared about her too!

Alya comes up to find Marinette in the balcony just as she detransformed. That was WAYY too close.

Obviously, this made Marinette angry. Like who wouldn't be? They did barge into her room without asking and she was already stressed out as it is. And they were also snooping through her stuff.

In the heat of anger, Marinette said that she didn't want their friendship, which shocked everyone. So they left. But they weren't mad, they were just upset.

At least no friends means reduced amount to lying??? Yeah, but we need friends in life, so it is a lose-lose case.

Sabine asks of they are okay and no one says anything. I wonder if she will ask Marinette later on.

They go to the park and as they recall their pain, ShadowMoth akumatizes them in a link because of their emotional connection to the bracelet. They didn't even have to hold hands in a circle!

Finally, a safeguard for the Miracle Box that isn't obvious and is protected by a passcode. The record sonogram (or whatever is called) that Master Fu had!

Bruh, they couldn't come up with something different for the Gang of Secrets other than their former akumatized selves???

And then the girls (now the Gang of Secrets) barge into Marinette's room (again) to get her to spill her secrets.

Trixx using their power of illusion to lead the Gang of Secrets somewhere else. And Marinette was hidden.

Lady WiFi wondering how Marinette jumped 3 stories without superpowers was just that wholesome moment like girl you don't even know.

Every kwami using their powers without a holder has their own adverse affect. For Trixx, it was making the Eifel Tower dance (or at least I think it's dancing)

Plagg is like "this isn't a me thing, this is an everyone thing, but more importantly a Trixx thing." Adrien is like "M'Lady needs me!"

Ladybug and Marinette merge into one (figuratively speaking) when she tells Chat why the Gang of Secrets was there in the first place. Poor girl, we need to give her a hug.

Ladybug confronts Lady WiFi and tries to tell her that she is trusted and about Rena Rouge. Then...

SHE BREAKS OUT OF HER SIDE OF THE AKUMATIZATION!!!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! ALYA HAS BECOME THE FIRST PERSON TO BE AKUMATIZED AND BREAK OUT OF IT! AND SHE HURT SHADOWMOTH WHILE DOING SO! I'M HAPPY FOR MY GIRL.

Ladybug trusts Alya and gives her the Fox Miraculous again. Not complaining, but what about ShadowMoth knowing her secret identity??? Miracle Queen anyone??? You know, a chunk of the reason WHY MARINETTE IS SUFFERING IN THE FIRST PLACE?!?!?!?

Also, teleportation of the Miraculous from the Miracle Box to Ladybug's yoyo! (Well more like a direct connection!) Cool and smart!

Rena Rouge, THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING US MARICHAT STANS AND OUT #justice for Marichat CAMPAIGN STARTED BY SOME OF MY FOLLOWERS ASKING FOR MORE MARICHAT EVEN IF IT WAS FOR 3 SECONDS!!!! (Yes I notice your comments peoples, I am generally a tired and busy person to respond, but I eventually acknowledge everything)

Can we take a moment and point out how amazing it was that Chat was fighting three (four???) akumas ON HIS OWN WHILE ON THE CAT PHONE!!! ICONIC!

IT WAS ALL SO CLOSE! SHADOWMOTH ALMOST HAD THE MIRACULOUS IF IT WEREN'T FOR PERFECT TIMING!

The moment with Alya in the alley! Friendship goals.

Marinette comes to terms that the breakup upsetted her so much and finds that love is complicated and chose friendship at the very least. Their reunion was what they all needed after what happened.

Alya stays behind to say that she knows that there is more, but will not press further. Can we get an applause for character growth?

Marinette asks her to stay longer as she wanted to tell her something.

It really was hard for her to keep lying to everyone and how she had to break up with Luka for this reason while also fearing that it would be the same with Adrien (she does not know, so she has a right to fear, also Chat Blanc!) She really needs a hug and such.

The whole concern about things changing between them is relatable to be but on a different context. It hit hard for me.

My fellow peoples: the moment that we were (sort of) waiting for ages is here:

JE SUIS LADYBUG! MARI TOLD ALYA THAT SHE'S LADYBUG!!!!

And Alya GIVES HER A HUG AS IN SHE UNDERSTOOD WHAT THIS MEANT AND THE REALIZATION OF WHAT MARINETTE WENT THROUGH!

As sad as I am that it was not Chat that she said this to first, I am glad that it was Alya. As her best friend literally hours prior to becoming Ladybug, having stuck by her side unconditionally, and having the willpower to break out of her akumatization, Alya is a perfect choice. Now I look forward to see how Alya helps Marinette deal with this burden.

Overall, this is a top tier episode, aka the best episode in the entire series in my opinion! I love how we explore Marinette's feelings regarding everything that is going on in her life and the ramifications of her being a guardian. It hurts and at the same time, it is beautifully executed! It shows the evolution of the writing and of the characters!

My arm hurt from the vaccine yesterday and these posts are usually long, so that's why it's released today rather than yesterday. Anyways, I recommend watching this episode!

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous #ml #ml ladybug #miraculoustalesofladybugandcatnoir #mlb #934 posts #marinette dupain cheng #ml spoilers #ml season 4 spoilers #miraculous season 4 spoilers #miraculous spoilers #mlb season 4 #miraculous season 4 #ml season 4 #miraculous les aventures de ladybug et chat noir #miraculous lb #miraculous fandom #mlb fandom #mlb 2021 #mlb spoilers #poor mari she needs a hug this season #gang of secrets spoilers #ml gang of secrets #gang of secrets #934 miraculous thoughts

[rose7420]

Close Encounters

Hey!! For a story request, can you do one where Thor corners a tiny teen on the kitchen counter and Loki comes in because he hears Thor talking to someone? Once Loki sees that Thor is scaring a tiny mortal, his soft, protective side comes out and he pushes Thor away from the tiny and scoops them up, saying things to calm her down. Then Thor is kinda like “Well why do you get to hold her?” Thor goes to try and grab the tiny off of Loki, but Loki isn’t having it and starts fighting with Thor, all while the teen is clinging onto Loki’s shirt because she knows that Loki is protecting her. Loki just ends up teleporting to his room and apologizes to the teen for Thor’s actions and Loki can’t even get the teen to let go of her shirt cause she’s that scared😂🥺

This was a request from the talented @laurenandloki ! Hope you like it!

Y/N had super bad anxiety. Being a borrower she never had the proper amount of socialization and she always felt like an outsider when she would quietly observe humans from a distance. They never knew she was there, but it was nice to be in the company of another living creature. One that didn’t view her as food. She had only gotten caught spying once in her life, by none other than the God of Mischief himself. That was about a month ago and he had terrified her out of her wits when they first met, yet, she discovered he was a gentle person who cared immensely for others. However, she was still a borrower and he a human so there could be no sense of a friendship for them. And so she had retreated to live away on her own in the walls of the tower.

In the current moment she stood behind a container that held sugar, she would know since she had “borrowed” from it quite a few times. But today, she came needing other items that were a bit harder to retrieve. Magnets. It sounded bizarre, but they came in handy for scaling tall objects susceptible to the magnetic pull. Magnets were hard to get because they were stuck on the fridge(which was very tall), were half as big as her body, and extremely hard to pull off the fridge. She carried a coil of rope and a harness she had made herself and roped it around her body. Latching the hook attached to the end of the rope to the top of the fridge she, scaled down the side searching for a magnet that wouldn’t be missed. That was the thing about humans. When they lost something they blamed it on their own consciousness, not the doing of a two-inch tall chick who lived in the walls. She found the right one finally and made her way down to it. So focused in fact, that she didn’t even notice the vibrations of the gargantuan god of Thunder making his way to the fridge for his next snack of the day.

“What in the nine-realms are you little one?” A huge voice booms out, ringing Y/N’s ears and stilling her movements. She knows who it belongs to already, Thor. The god has a huge personality that matches his unwavering optimism. He is also very touchy as she has observed, which is why she is not at all prepared for what comes next. She forgets all about the magnet and tries to find a grip to haul herself up the fridge with.

“It’s not safe for you all the way up there, why it must be like a building up there.” Immediately, pressure is at her waist and enormous fingers lift her off the cool surface of the fridge. His powerful movements snap her rope, losing her only way of a safe escape.

His unshaven, but kind face fills her entire line of vision. The fingers still hold her waist and his eyes search her form intently. There are too many sensations around her and her mind is overwhelmed.

Breathing becomes difficult, her sight becomes a dark tunnel and lightheadedness is all she can feel. Thor is too busy filling his curiosity to notice the panic-attack she is currently having.

“Are you ill tiny one?” Thor questions but Y/N has not the mind to answer his question. Also believing that the answer is pretty obvious.

“Brother, what do you have there?” Thor swings around, facing the owner of the voice. The motion makes Y/N even sicker to her stomach. She however does recognize the person’s voice. Loki.

Suddenly she feels even dizzier, looking up she sees she is being passed around like a toy as Loki now has her in his grasp. She lays down on the surface of his palm relishing the feeling of having some sort of control over her body. Breathing becomes easier, not as if she is inhaling through a straw and her vision is no longer blurred as she can see clearly. She glances around at her surroundings and sees she is held up to a black, soft, and cotton wall. Loki’s chest. His breaths shift her up and down, yet, the movement is comforting. She finds herself fisting his shirt with her small hands trying to burrow her body further into his chest. A loud yell causes her to jump out of her skin and cling to Loki even tighter.

“Give her here brother, I am in no mood for your tricks!” Thor exclaims loudly, hurting Y/N’s ears.

“You were frightening her Thor. Just look at her.” The comforting darkness she was kept in for a brief amount of time vanished as Loki removes his other shielding hand to reveal her to Thor. Thor bends to her level looking her directly in the eyes. Anxiety spikes in her veins again sending an uncomfortable jolt of panic in her stomach and a tightness in her chest. She whimpers audibly and turns her face to Loki’s chest once again. Why must everything be so scary? She thinks to herself.

A soothing motion upon her back takes her out of her panicking thoughts. Her face leaves Loki’s shirt and sees that he is rubbing her back with a single finger. And that she had been transported to Loki’s bedroom.

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Loki couldn't stand seeing this small being panicking anymore. He remembered seeing the small one earlier before and letting her be, but today when she had been so vulnerable in front of his oaf for a brother, he couldn’t just stand by and watch. It was obvious that the small one was terror-struck by the presence of larger beings as himself. So he had teleported to his room to calm her down. Her entire body clung to his shirt like a lifeline and he had tried to pry her off his chest but she held strong, not willing to leave him just yet. He stopped trying to force her off him, afraid her tiny arms would break at his immense strength. Instead, he rubbed her back in soothing circles with the tip of his finger. He awed at the size difference. His entire finger dwarfed her body, it took not even a slight bend of his finger to caress her back. He shuddered at the fragility of this tiny being.

Not to mention she had put her trust in him to protect her from Thor. Even though he knew Thor was probably the only person on this earth that you would never need protection from because of his kind, generous heart. Sometimes his brother came off too strong to those he showed an intense interest with. And to this small girl, he would imagine the interaction between Thor and her would be very intense from her perspective.

Once the girl realized she was in no danger she slowly released herself from his person. He slowly raised her to his eye-level taking in the rare sight of an actual borrower. Loki had read about them in informational books on Asgard, there were not many factual books here on Earth, but they had plenty of fictional ones. From what he read, borrowers were on average around the height of three to four inches. But this girl seemed to be barely clearing two and a half. She was exceptionally small and this caused him to be even more cautious as he bore her in a palm.

She perched on her hands and knees, staring at him with big, round (Y/E/C) eyes. He had to practically bring her right on top of his nose to see her properly. He felt her anxiety rising under his close inspection and he lowered her down to his bedside table, kneeling to see her better. Awkwardness lingered at first but Loki broke the silence.

“Your exceptionally small, little one. What shall I call you?”

He watched her face scrunch up in anger, not responding to his question.

“Hmmm, let’s see… I can call you little one, of course, Thumbelina, Bite-Size, or-”

“Okay! Stop, just stop, call me Y/N.”She said with her arms crossed over her chest trying to be intimidating but failing.

“Y/N, what a delightful name. Are you alright now? I apologize for my brother’s actions.” Loki said being serious now.

Y/N nodded her head, “Y-yeah I’m okay now. I have really b-bad anxiety.” She admitted.

Loki smiled reassuringly, “I promise you to have nothing to fear from me or my brother.”

“Would you like me to assist you back to your quarters Y/N?”

“A-actually could I hang out with you for a little bit. I-I don’t really have many friends and I find your company...tolerable.” Y/N said with a bit of hesitation.

Loki laughed at her remark, “Just tolerable huh? Well, I must tell you that I find your company rather tolerable too Thumbelina.” He retorted with a smirk.

Y/N blushed and grinned, he offered a helpful palm to boost her to his shoulder.

“What should we do?” Loki asked.

“I don’t know, what do you have in mind?” Y/N asked, taking a comfortable seat where the dip in his collarbone lay.

Her little body tickled his neck and Loki laughed once again responding with, “I have a perfect idea,” with mischief coating his voice.

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Y/N watched with fascination as Loki illusioned a snake out of thin air. Snakes did terrify her as a borrower, but way up on Loki’s shoulder she had no fear of the serpent on the ground. Loki’s shoulder was pretty comfortable, she clung to his neck and could feel every movement that he made, and his voice thundered through her when he spoke even in a whisper. They were waiting for someone to walk and spot the snake. Finally, a passerby came, one she recognized to be Peter. As he walked he immediately spotted the snake and screamed loudly running away. Loki almost doubled over in laughter as did Y/N. He cupped her in his hands, holding her safely in his embrace. Y/N couldn't stop smiling for another reason. She had finally found a friend.

#gt loki #Loki #tiny reader #peter x borrower #Loki x borrower #loki x female reader #borrower #giant Loki #shrunk

[autumnslance]

would you be willing to make a masterpost of all your sharlayan research and headcanons? please please please and THANK YOU if you do

I can certainly try! A lot of my info is from what little we have so far, and my own fics are where a lot of my headcanons go to live, with little snippets about various characters here and there in my scattered lore posts, as well as stuff I’ve collected from other players.

Other Resources In Louisoix’s Wake - The twins’ official Calamity short story on the Lodestone. One Name, One Promise - Thancred’s backstory, from Limsa to Sharlayan training to his early assignment in Ul’dah and then early Shadowbringers. Mirke’s Menagerie - A compilation of lore info from in game, lorebooks, panels, interviews, short stories, etc. There are about 4 or 5 Sharlayan-specific posts @mirkemenagerie has made.

Encyclopaedia Eorzea - If you can get your hands on copies (physical officially; digitally is Unofficial so far as I know), I recommend it! They’re both good reads, though EE 1 is the one with a blurb on Sharlayan as a nation.

Posts by Other People - that I have collected Leveva Comment About Archon Loaf - Keeping in mind Sharlayan’s bad cuisine has been canonical for years per lorebook 1. They care more about ease of eating while studying, also seeing culinary arts as an academic field, not a practical daily exercise. Lorebook 1 Astrologian Lore - screencaps from the lorebook. Phaedra’s Teen Scion Sharlayan Antics fic - I am happy to take responsibility for inspiring @phaedra-mero to write this delightful scene.

My Own Posts Red Mage Research - Includes books from Gubal Library. Scion Ages - Pointing out the ages of the Scions, particularly the Archons.

My Fics - Sometimes there’s more HC musings in the Notes and Comments. I try to stay close to canon, at least as it is when the fic was written. Rogue’s Prelude - Multichapter, teen Thancred meets Louisoix, Yda, and Papalymo. Written a year prior to Thancred’s official ShB story above. Aetherology & Skulking Boots-Beginnings - Y’shtola agrees to tutor Thancred in how to speak properly as teenagers in the colony. Chin Up - Yda gives Thancred advice as youths in the colony. Dreams of Home-Lucubration - Yda, Lyse, and Thancred in the colony. Younger Sister - Thancred’s relationships with the Hext sisters over time. In Violet’s Wake-Louisoix’s Children - A Master Matoya PoV from StB patches. There’s a brief chapter with her and Y’mhitra in Dreams of Home, too. Excerpts from other posts - things that ended up as commentary on other threads, with some editing since.

From a thread that started off as about Thancred’s Gear from ARR to HW:

Sharlayan is a nation on an island NW of Eorzea proper; the Sharlayan everyone we know hails from was a colony that became a city-state a few hundred years back and part of the Eorzean Alliance, in the Dravanian Hinterlands, where Idyllshire is now. After the fall of Ala Mhigo and then the Battle of Silvertear Skies, the Forum (their ruling body) decided to abandon the city and return to the motherland, a process that took 5 years before they all just teleported out in a day. Except Matoya, and those archons that worked for Louisoix and that he asked to stay and go to the remaining 3 Alliance cities. This would have been 15 years before ARR/Heavensward.

The Students of Baldesion are also Sharlayan; the Isle of Val, their headquarters, being under that nation’s banner. Sons of St Coinach are another offshoot; Rammbroes (Crystal Tower raid story) was originally part of Louisoix’s Circle of Knowing (who eventually became the Scions), and Y’shtola’s sister Y’mhitra is one of the Sons and part of the Summoner storyline.

Thancred got involved as a youth–by trying to pick Louisoix’s pocket, and impressing the old man with his skills, and so Louisoix brought Thancred back with him to give the kid an opportunity for study. Yda and Lyse escaped Ala Mhigo, and with help from Papalymo, who was part of an effort to help refugees seeking shelter in Sharlayan, they ended up there, and Yda is the one who actually became an archon.

Most of the other senior Scions, so far as I know, are native to Sharlayan, either the motherland or the colony. The Leveilleur twins were born in the Hinterlands Sharlayan, but raised in the motherland, as they were less than a year old when the exodus happened. The university they and Krile attended is the Studium. Becoming an Archon seems to be a separate process not everyone goes through, and is a demonstration of mastery in chosen field(s) of study. That’s the significance of the tattoos some of the Scions have on their necks or faces.

Sharlayan is basically a nation particularly focused on academia; the trouble is, for the last couple decades, it’s been controlled by a faction of isolationists who would rather hoard knowledge and sit in the proverbial ivory tower looking down on non-Sharlayans, claiming others would abuse their knowledge, and that they should simply observe history and not try to affect it. Louisoix, Matoya, and the organizations they associate with (the Circle of Knowing/Scions; Sons of St Coinach, the Students of Baldesion, etc), think that viewpoint is stupid and go against it. A big part of the Astrologian storyline is dealing with Sharlayans who dislike Leveva’s family sharing Sharlayan astrology with outsiders, for example.

What sort of relationship Sharlayan and Ishgard had before the exodus isn’t really detailed much; both were pretty insular and focused on their own issues (like many of Eorzea’s city-states outside of crises), and the Dravanian threat at the time might have kept them pretty separated by land. Sharlayan was responsible for Eorzea’s aetherytes and keeping the aethernets working, though, and it’s suggested they still handle that post-Calamity to some degree. We pay fees for teleports because reconstruction and upkeep is pricey for all of the city-states.

Next post:

The Isle of Val was the headquarters of the Students of Baldesion, Krile’s family and order, and was a Sharlayan institution. It’s destruction/missing status happened during the ARR patches, and Krile was saved by Hydaelyn as she has the Echo (as an aside: you can hear Minfilia talking to Krile via linkpearl in the background on the Enterprise after rescuing the Scions from Castrum Centri before Ultima, and she constantly refers to and worries about Krile after the Isle of Val goes missing, but then plot happened to Minfilia so we never see them together as friends). The Ascians seemed to have a hand in the Isle’s disappearance…but there’s story about the fate of the Isle of Val and the Students of Baldesion in Stormblood’s Eureka plotline.

As for the Archon Marks, if they do confer social benefits, aside from being an easily seen status symbol for some highly skilled & educated folks, it hasn’t been mentioned yet in concrete terms, though we know the rank has benefits (like access to forbidden lore). Mostly they are a way to tell at a glance who has obtained the rank. It’s like if people with doctorates had a tattoo of their degree symbol on them so you knew just by looking.

As of Shadowbringers 5.4, we know that to become an Archon a thesis is required, and it’s a great deal more work than a Studium graduate’s final thesis. It strikes me that Studium (which some of the Scion Archons also attended) is like undergrad or Masters studies, while Archon is a Doctorate level.

I personally headcanon that the arcane marks confer some minor, slowed visible aging and other vague magical benefits befitting their rank in Sharlayan society. Really, that’s a way for the devs to avoid new models and add to the confusion in 1.0′s intros and the running joke about Y’shtola’s age, BUT let’s come up with an in-world thing, too. There has to be some explanation for Thancred’s perpetual baby face when he’s not RPing a Mountain Hobo ;) Also we really don’t know for sure how old Matoya is. Just old.

Lorebook 2 Notes:

Mikoto Jinba (Return to Ivalice, Save the Queen storylines) worked on aetheric siphon research with Moenbryda, and at 29 is the youngest Raen with the rank of Archon in recent history. It was Jessie’s connections that brought her to Cid’s attention and got her involved in the Return to Ivalice story.

Ejika Tsunjika (Eureka storyline) went to school at the same time as Krile and Leveilleur twins, endorsed by Galuf Baldesion, who Ejika later chose to work under. He’s resentful of Krile and the twins as Ejika himself is of humble origins and had to struggle to get to where he is, yet hides his Archon brands with high collars as he refuses to believe himself unique or exceptional.

#Final Fantasy XIV #Lore #Sharlayan #Archons #Scions of the Seventh Dawn #Anonymous

[fortunes-favor]

As if I Am Looking in a Mirror

Co-written with @nottthebest

Paring: Essek thelyss/Caleb Widogast 

Word Count: ~2.8k 

Rating: T Summary: Caleb Widogast and Essek Thelyss both have plans to facilitate spending their lives together. Yussa helps.

Read on Ao3

Caleb and Essek are together for years. And though time is his specialty, Essek finds it slipping through his grasp.

As the weeks and months go by, Essek starts to notice strands of grey hair among a sea of red. And then another. And another, until Caleb’s hair is a mess of orange and red and white and silver.

It hurts seeing Caleb get older when he stays much the same age, at least in appearance. While Caleb is far past middle-aged, Essek is still only barely halfway into his second century.

So one day, he makes up his mind. It comes to him as they sit and study together, Caleb leaning against Essek’s chest, with Essek’s fingers absentmindedly running through Caleb’s salted strands. Caleb’s reading a book, and Essek has his own, though he hasn’t been able to concentrate on it. His fingers come to a stop, catching Caleb’s attention. Caleb leans his head back to see Essek’s thousand-yard stare.

“What’s the matter, liebling? I know that look,” Caleb teases lightly, his voice more gravelly with age.

Essek smiles in return. “Lost in thought. My mind’s been drifting so much these days.”

“Where to?” Caleb puts down his book and shifts to get a better look at the man he loves, causing Perle, one of their three cats, to yowl in protest before jumping off of Caleb’s lap. Caleb mutters a soft apology at the white cat before turning back to look at Essek’s face.

“Oh, places. I wonder what our friends are up to.” He deflects.

If Caleb knew his real train of thought… Well, that conversation will happen later.

“I’ll be visiting Beauregard at the Soul tomorrow. I’ll give you a rundown on what she and Yasha are up to.”

And at that moment, an idea strikes Essek.

“Perhaps I will go pay a visit to Jester and Fjord then. I hear Veth could also use a hand with her summer camps. Maybe a day or two on the coast would be nice.”

Caleb places a quick gentle kiss on his temple. “That sounds lovely. Just, make sure to take your parasol. We don’t want a repeat of last time.”

Essek scoffs, unappreciative of the reminder of the sunburn incident, but gives Caleb a soft smile followed by a sweet kiss on his lips anyway.

The following day, Caleb packs his things and, with a kiss goodbye, teleports directly to the Cobalt Reserve.

Knowing now is his chance, Essek gathers his spellbook and some gem dust. He puts precisely hundred-and-twenty-seven pounds of clay in a vault of amber. And he teleports to Nicodranas.

Jester and the others receive a quick visit, just in case Caleb asks about it later. He’s sure Jester will have sent him a message the moment he walked out the door. But he has a mission for today. With an illusioned disguise—not of Dezran Thain, he never wants to be him again— he quickly makes his way to the monumental tower he knew a friend of a friend would be at. He only hopes he can convince the mage to help.

He greets the goblin servant at Tidepeak, introducing himself as Essek of the Mighty Nein. He says that he has a spell to share with the goblin’s master, one that he’s sure the mage will find fascinating. The goblin lets him in after some persuasion. Once inside, Essek drops the illusion.

“Um. One moment.” Wensforth politely gives a slight bow before scurrying up the stairs, leaving Essek in the foyer. After a few out-of-earshot comments are passed, Essek’s ears perk up.

“Essek Thelyss,” an amused sounding voice rings from somewhere above the entryway. “I’ve heard a lot about you. Come upstairs. Please.”

The mage looks different from when Essek last saw him, but the last time Essek saw him, his face was a void, and his soul was trapped by a living city, so it’s not surprising.

Now, Yussa Errenis sits with thinly-veiled interest on his very-much-there face. “What can I do for you?”

“I have a favour to ask of you.”

Yussa’s interested look turns to one of surprise. “And why would I do you a favour? Do you offer me anything in return?”

Essek grins. “I am a member of the Mighty Nein, as well as one of the people who helped save you from the Astral Sea. I’m sure we can work something out.”

He luckily convinces Yussa to perform the transmogrification ritual to turn him into a fifty-seven-year-old human. Same age as Caleb. Yussa doesn’t quite understand why he would give up the many centuries he has left to live, but it’s fascinating magic that Yussa hasn’t yet had the chance to test, and if the drow wants to be foolish, he’s not going to stop him.

An hour later, Essek is human, skin darker than Beauregard's but cooler in tone, and hair still snowy white. His facial structure is as similar as it can be without raising suspicion. He’s a little taller but not enough to make much of a difference. The wrinkles are new. His skin feeling too loose on his body is new. His ears are definitely going to take some getting used to, and he’s going to have to stop wearing some of his ear cuffs and caps, specifically ones meant to fit pointed elf ears.

At the end of it all, Essek is packing his belongings, still trying to get used to the new body. He is exhausted but also feels like he’s floating, content. He will be able to spend his life with Caleb.

He suddenly stands up straight. “One more thing.”

Yussa’s humoured sigh is not well hidden at all. “Yes, of course, I am at your service. what else?”

Essek hesitates for a moment. “Do not tell Caleb what we have done here today.”

That interested look from before returns to Yussa’s expression. “I hesitate to ask for clarification on that request.”

Essek gives him no clarity, and after a quick thanks, disappears in a show of teleportation magic.

Through the elation of practicing an advanced spell, a similar happiness comes with a thought.

He can grow old with Caleb now. Even if they have very little time left, their time is going to be spent together. And if there is an afterlife, one won’t have to wait long for the other to join him there.

*********

Not too long after, Yussa has yet another visitor. He’s fully expecting the drow––human?––to be back, regretting his decision and asking to work on a reversal of it, see if they can revert him back to an elf, without having to wait the one year. It surprises him to see, instead, a slightly nervous Caleb Widogast, shifting his weight lightly from one side to the other.

“What a coincidence, Mister Widogast. I was expecting-” He shakes his head faintly, remembering his promise. “Nevermind that. What can I do for you?”

Caleb looks skeptical for a second before his expression turns neutral. “I have a favour to ask of you.”

Deja vu is not something Yussa has experienced much in his 400 or so years of life, but then again, it's not often you befriend– no, become indebted to a group as unpredictable as the Mighty Nein.

“Of course.”

Further to Yussa’s surprise, Caleb is asking him much the same thing as his partner did. Except, Caleb is asking to be turned into an elf. Yussa doesn’t know why they wouldn’t have just done this in the first place, if the goal was to match the other’s life expectancy. Then it dawns on him.

He considers divulging Thelyss’ secret, but he did swear to him he wouldn’t tell Widogast about it. And the thought of them seeing each other's plans after they’ve been carried out is amusing, to say the very least. Plus, what’s the harm in watching the world burn just a little? He’s not beyond wasting someone else’s spell components to have a little fun, especially when that person is convinced that this is the thing to do. What’s another point of exhaustion compared to a good joke?

So he agrees. And the ritual begins and ends with expected success. Caleb’s silvering hair is now returned to its coppery brightness, the skin stretched more taught against his sharper, slimmer, ever so slightly more elegant features, his ears now pulled to fine points.

Oh, Yussa would very much enjoy seeing their reactions to each other’s new forms.

Yussa stifles laughter that’s building up at the thought. It really is too bad that both Thelyss and Widogast still wear the amulets that would keep him from Scrying on them. Oh, well, he will surely hear about it later, if not from the pair of knucklehead wizards then from their blue friend who is all too enthusiastic to Send to him.

He’s once again surprised that he’s looking forward to hearing from them.

*********

Essek returns to an empty home several hours later, having enjoyed the Nicodranas sun for the first time in his near-century-and-a-half for a while before returning. Faer, Perle and Fate filter into the room that houses their teleportation circle and all come to a confused halt upon seeing Essek. Essek is unsure of the reason for the change in behaviour for a moment before it hits him that he’s no longer in the body his cats are familiar with.

“Oh, it’s me,” he quickly says in Undercommon, kneeling down in front of the three cats with a hand reaching out to them. “I, ah, look––and smell I’m sure––a little different, but it’s me.”

Perle starts taking tentative steps toward Essek and cautiously sniffs his hand before gently nuzzling her head against Essek’s hand in a show of trust. Faer and Fate soon follow suit after being assured that Essek means them no harm, even if they don’t know it’s him.

Oh, gods, would they ever recognize him again? Would they think that Essek abandoned them if they never notice Essek’s human form to be the Essek that they know?

Essek shakes his head to dismiss the thoughts. Even if the cats never know it’s him, this will have been worth it to not have to live a life without Caleb at his side.

He feeds the cats before grabbing his book from the study and making his way to the bedroom. He trades his day clothing for his flowy pyjama pants, noting the slight difference in fit to his new, slightly less lithe body.

A while after he gets comfortable on the bed and starts reading, Faer jumps onto the bed and curls up at Essek’s side. Essek smiles softly to himself and lays a hand on Faer’s dark grey fur, petting him softly. Over the next couple of hours, while he reads, the other two cats join him on the bed. Perle making biscuits on Caleb’s pillow for a few minutes before settling on it, and Fate lies at the foot of the bed, almost at the very edge. Essek knows he will have to be careful not to kick him off the bed in the night.

Sleep takes him not long after he thinks; It seems there is hope for me with the cats after all.

*********

The next day, Essek hears Caleb come home before he sees him. Essek’s in the study, mulling over scenarios of how best to tell Caleb what he’s done when he hears his partner. Fate jumps off his spot on the desk next to the journal Essek’s jotting down ideas in, presumably to welcome Caleb home.

“I’m in the study, ussta che,” he calls out, standing up promptly. He dusts off imaginary lint from his leggings and wills his hands not to shake. “I, ah, have something to show you!”

“As do I,” Caleb says. Essek waits for rustling, the telltale noises of his wizard going through his bag in search of one thing or the other. It doesn’t come. Instead, Essek hears the approaching footfalls of Caleb.

When Caleb appears at the door, Essek is about to give Caleb a sheepish hello. However, he is shocked out of it the moment his eyes land on Caleb’s elven face. Caleb seems to be faring similarly as his mouth falls open in surprise and his long pointy elf ears twitch.

“Was..?” Caleb manages to get out weakly.

“It, ah, appears that we had a similar train of thought, chathtiu.”

Essek tentatively starts walking toward Caleb, never taking his eyes off the elf. Caleb Widogast is an elf.

“You’re human.”

“Oh,” Essek says, realizing the hilarity of the situation. He is a human now. And Caleb is an elf. Oh, gods. “Yes, I am,” he remembers to respond. “You’re an elf,” he adds immediately after.

“Is this one of your disguises?” There’s a trace of worry in his laugh.

“No.” He laughs in return, trying to ease the weird tension. “I paid our friend Yussa a visit. Something I assume you may have done as well?”

“Ja,” Caleb confirms and cradles his face with a smaller-than-Essek-is-used-to hand. “Schatz… You did this... You would have given your centuries away for me? You have such a long life to live.”

“No,” Essek says, wrapping his arms around Caleb’s neck. “Centuries without you would not have been living.”

“You didn’t think that I might also want to spend centuries with you?”

“I know you wouldn’t want to make your parents wait for you that long, Caleb. I also do not wish for you to have to watch the rest of the Nein die one after the other. I would never ask that of you.”

“I am offering, mein sternenlicht. You would need only accept,” He says, pressing a kiss at Essek’s temple.

“Caleb,” Essek protests softly and lets his eyes fall shut with a deep sigh.

“Unless that is, you find yourself not wanting to spend an elf’s lifespan with me,” Caleb amends, pulling back from Essek. Caleb doesn’t go too far, but Essek feels his warmth pull away anyway and snaps his eyes open.

“Caleb, you know I would stay with you through everything. But elves grow up knowing that they are going to be alive for hundreds and hundreds of years. Humans… You… I fear that you cannot fathom just how long those centuries are.” He runs a loving hand through his partner’s once-again-fully-copper hair and causes his hair tie to come undone, letting down strands as bright as the sun. “I do not want you to grow to regret your decision, chathtiu.”

“It’s good to know that you don’t have enough faith in me and our relationship that you would believe I might regret you if I am given more time,” Caleb teases, but Essek can still feel his hurt through the playful tone.

Essek rubs his temple and carefully chooses his next words to avoid any further miscommunication-related hurt. “Caleb, my love, that is not what I am implying. I trust in us enough to know that you will love me through the remainder of your days. I simply mean that I do not want you to regret this decision.” He gestures at Caleb’s elven body. “You will be the last of the Nein; even Caduceus will have a shorter life than us. Perhaps it is selfish of me, but I do not want to see you go through that.”

Caleb’s face softens. “We,” he says.

Essek tilts his head in question.

“We would be the last of the Nein,” Caleb says, punctuating his words with a kiss on Essek’s lips. “Even still, I see your point, schatz. As much as I would love to spend centuries with you, I did not think about how lonely we both would be without our friends.”

“We could turn them into elves too,” Essek says, joking.

“That is a tempting idea.” Caleb smiles. “But maybe we could meet in the middle.”

“What did you have in mind?”

*********

About a year after he helped an elf become human and a human an elf, Yussa watches two half-elves walk towards the entrance of his tower, one with bright red hair and fair skin, the other with white hair and ashen brown skin. He tells Wensforth to go put some tea on and that he will greet their guests himself, before making his way down to the door.

“Mr. Widogast, Mr. Thelyss, I see you’ve worked something out.”

#shadowgast #fic #shadowgast fic #my fics #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #yussa errenis

[maydaymadier]

Time

[Disclaimer: I’m currently slightly more than halfway through the c2 finale and I’m going to try and avoid spoilers since well, there’s still like 3hrs of content to get spoiled on.  Will likely crosspost to my ao3]

“Time, it takes time, not days or weeks or years.  Time.”

Caleb Widogast was right, though to be precise it takes 100 consecutive days of inscribing a teleportation circle in the same place to make it permanent.  Nicodranas was the first teleportation circle Essek Thelyss finished.  100 days of pounding sun and coastal heat felt fitting to start his time.  He had his trepidations about better acquainting himself with Yussa, less so with Ms. Lavorre.  The Nein asked why he needed to make a teleportation circle in Nicodranas, they already had access to Tidepeak Tower’s.  ‘Yes, however, we will not have to give anyone advance notice to use our own.’  

Jester made something of a habit of bringing him a new parasol or sunhat each time she visited, even brought him tinted glasses she found once.  If he knew she was coming he’d make sure to wear one of them.  

Each time he ran out of chalk he’d wrap himself in illusion and teleport himself to Zadash.  Meanwhile, the stores in his towers grew dust-laden, his absence from the Dynasty more suspicious, and he bought his chalk from Enchanter Sol.  The Mighty Nein were a family, regardless of any distance, and he had the means to make distance mean nothing.  So Essek Thelyss carried on.  And on the hundredth day, he stepped into a circle in Nicodranas and stepped out in the Blooming Grove.

He was invited in for tea, as expected, and accepted as was polite.  The next day he found the spot behind the temple where the grass had been flattened by the circle delivering him and started his next hundred days.  He ‘compensated’ for his intrusion with his floating meditative guard each night.  Caduceus seemed to pick up on what he was doing faster than Jester had, by a thin margin.  The remaining Clay children would poke their noses in once and a while, curious about their drow visitor they’d only met briefly before but they remembered him helping garden after Ikithon set the temple ablaze.  They would offer him a plate at meals, he insisted on using his own rations in a strange dance of hospitality and being a polite guest.  

At one point, after finishing the day’s circle he considered venturing through the Savalirwood to Glory Run Road, find Mollymauk’s grave.  But it felt disrespectful to Kingsley somehow in a way he couldn’t articulate.  If he were to be more dramatic it felt like an invasion of privacy to the rest of the Nein as a whole, intruding on a moment on a place where they were unknowing adversaries.  So he kept inscribing circles in the grass and sometimes he found fresh chalk in his component pouch.  On occasion, Caduceus found saplings and cuttings of Xorhasian plants on his windowsill.

On the hundredth day he stepped into the circle in the Blooming Grove and came out under Caduceus’s tree in the Xorhaus.  He was far more careful with this one.  The Xorhaus was sparsely used, bordering on abandoned at this point, more than ready for the Nein to inhabit it once again.  Beauregard, oft accompanied by Yasha, used it the most for when they visited Rosohna on Cobalt Soul business.  The Bright Queen had been more than amenable to working with the Soul once she knew they were dismantling the organization that had stolen the beacons.  

Though it took three days before Beau realized he was working on making a circle on the roof, pruning away his extra time by trying to tame the garden, clad in his rose-patterned gardening gloves, what with his lackluster previous experience.  She offered to go bring him chalk from his towers, anything else he might need that he’d left behind when he was posted in Eiselcross.  He accepted the offer, to eschew suspicion, asking for some simple components that filled any wizard’s pouch.  Sooner than later, soon enough Beau couldn’t knock the truth out of him (not that she needed to do that or would, he was growing increasingly susceptible to disappointed stares from his friends) he stepped into the circle in Rosohna and stepped out in Rexxentrum.

His skin crawled and felt like it would slough off with each passing day.  He wasn’t so bold at this point to attempt and make a circle on Soltryce’s grounds but he did take pleasure in chipping away the next hundred days in the courtyard of Trent Ikithon’s now abandoned tower.  It was a joy, absolutely cathartic tearing apart what little remained hidden away of the bastard’s stores.  The most valuable and precious artifacts and components were hidden in ways only an archmage would even know about or know how to unlock.  Malicious clumsiness might have gotten him to break an important, now inert, magical tool or two as he rummaged through the tower for chalk.  

Though one day, he noticed an owl perched in a tree, watch him for an hour, disappear for a few minutes, reappear, so on and so forth for the whole day.  He had a good idea who the owl was but she never watched him again after that.  If she wanted to know what he was doing here, fine.  It wasn’t like either could rat out the other without drawing unwanted attention to them both.  So on the hundredth day, what little remained of Trent Ikithon’s personal study even more thoroughly destroyed, he stepped into the circle in Rosohna and stepped out.

Essek chipped away at the for now final circle under the watchful light of Pelor.  Passively, the part of him that absorbed every ounce of knowledge, regardless if he cared or not, wondered what the connection may be between whatever the Luxon is and the Dawnfather.  Just a fun little thought experiment to occupy him while he worked through the next hundred days.

By the end of Brussendar, with Highsummer fast approaching, he’d decided that he ought to have brought at least one of Jester’s hats.  Though more importantly he’d decided that the thought was silly and any connection between the two deities must be entirely aesthetic.  Nothing he didn’t already know but what else can a wizard do but overthink?

It wasn’t the same level of festivities he’d heard about with Harvest’s Close but Highsummer seemed to be the close second in Blumenthal.  He sat, disguised in the shade of an oak probably as old as he was and simply watched from afar.  Somewhere in the crowd, he saw a flash of copper.  Tried not to think to much of it.  Red hair seemed slightly more common in this corner of the empire.  He caught the sweeping arc of a long, striped scarf being tossed over a shoulder.  A leather coat dusting at the ground (though he had looked so good in purple).

Caleb Widogast stepped out of the crowd and sat under the oak with him, “I suppose a criminal always returns to the scene of the crime.” “I suppose I have,” Essek stared at his feet. Caleb offered him some sort of sweet roll wrapped in paper, “I was not talking about you.” He ignored the comment, “How long has it been?  Since we last spoke.” “Four hundred and eighty-six days.  About a year and a half to be informal,” he just set down the roll next to his hand when he didn’t move to take it. “I keep thinking one day it will have been enough time.” “Looking for the specific number will drive you mad.  Are you just going to keep making circles across Wildemount until you feel that you’ve atoned?” Essek took the roll but only held it,  “I know that I cannot make up for everything.  What are you doing here, anyways?” “I have been trying to convince myself to visit.  Maybe try to pay my respects if I can stomach it.  The others had already told me what you were doing, but Astrid told me where you were going.  Figured now was good a time as any,” his expression darkened, the reality beyond the afterglow of a hard-won victory whispering into both their ears. “I-,” Essek started. “Did you know I was from here before you picked it or did you just want to taunt Rexxentrum by hiding in their breadbasket for a while?” Caleb stared him down. “I knew.” “Alright then.” “I hope I have not intruded in some way by coming here.” “I suppose we were both curious about the echo.  It’s right up your alley, prodigious dunamancer and whatnot,” Caleb glanced back up at the revelers before turning his attention back to him “I would not discount your own skill, you’ve picked up dunamancy quite quickly and with a level of skill I have rarely seen.”  Maybe they can just talk about magic. “Danke.” There was an uncomfortable pause in the conversation.

“When do you think-?” Essek tried asking. “I don’t.  I will not pretend to know when enough time will have passed for the past not to hurt us anymore, Essek.  And counting it in teleportation circles will not make it go any faster,” he said, though with the crushing sadness to his eyes of a man who wished he were wrong. “I am trying to make it easier for us to see each other,” he said with easy authority. “It is much easier to see each other when we don’t run off to the four corners,” Caleb added on with a tired chuckle. “What are you implying?”  Something caught between excitement and unease hit him. “I can stay.  Help you finish the circle here, we can leave, make another.  As many circles as we want.  We can have the continent at our fingertips.  Maybe even go back to what remains of Aeor in Eiselcross.  Devexian couldn’t have been the only mechanical inhabitant.  For all we know there is a city of automatons underneath the ice now,” Caleb got more excited and dreamy as he went on, the unbridled excitement of a mage faced with knowledge. “That sounds...nice...,” Essek trailed off, trying to sound as neutral as he could manage. “Do you want that, Essek?”

It felt like the word was tearing its way out of him, “Yes.”

#my post #critical role #mighty nein #cr fic #cr fanfic #essek thelyss #shadowgast #just a sprinkling of shadowgast there at the end #post-canon #Essek is Coping

[sodone-withlife]

enough

yay this is my first fic in over a month, and as per usual, there's not much proofreading. all mistakes are my own. also, this isn't as whump-y as my past works and includes a number of my headcanons

@yourlocalheartbreaker here's over 2k words of a rather OOC Criminal Minds fanfic based on your post :) I've intentionally made the ending a bit ambiguous, so let your imagination run wild. the case is also based on what happened in Boston.

here’s a post that clarifies some ambiguities

warnings: alcohol, mentioned character death, mentioned canon typical violence. also, I love all of the characters, but for the purposes of this story, this will come across as everyone (except Hotch, Morgan, and Strauss) slander. don't like it, don't read it.

word count: 2.2k words

“I really am sorry I couldn’t do more,” Strauss said quietly.

Hotch shook his head, staring into his whiskey. “You’ve already done so much,” he said equally quietly. He hesitated, wondering if he should give voice to the thought that had been nagging at him since the last in a week-long series of grueling questioning and testimony.

Fuck it, he thought, dowing the last of his whiskey.

“I think we both knew it was coming,” he said, looking at his now-former boss unflinchingly. To her credit, Strauss didn’t try to hide that she shared his thoughts as they shared a knowing look. “Too many minor bureaucratic infractions, a few major fiascos,” he continued, shaking his head ruefully, “it was only a matter of when.”

Strauss remained silent, swirling the last of her own drink in her glass. It was a longstanding tradition between the two of them to go out for drinks after especially taxing cases and bureaucratic nightmares, one that started weeks after Gideon stepped down and went on leave.

Finally, she broke the silence. “Why did you lie? You and I know very well you had nothing to do with it.” She turned to face Hotch fully, a hint of confusion appearing in her expression. “Why take the fall?”

The answer easily came to Hotch, but it didn’t erase the bitterness with which the words came out. “The leader is replaceable, but the team isn’t.” He looked pained, avoiding her incredulous stare. “Same reason as always.”

He could understand her exasperation; it wasn’t the first time he had discussed the issues within the team with her. Over the years, she tried again and again to get him out, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he did. She eventually accepted his refusal to leave, but it didn’t stop her from dropping hints of disapproval here and there—and they both knew some secret part of him agreed with her disparaging comments, much as he tried to ignore it.

The team dynamics had never truly recovered from Boston and Adrian Bale, and that had carried over to the newer members of the team who joined after the fiasco. His standoffish, laconic nature certainly didn’t help. Eventually, even Gideon was ignoring the cracks in the foundation of the team,

Out of all of his coworkers, only Strauss and Morgan remembered (and still sometimes saw) the less-guarded agent with surprising idealism that he had been before everything went to shit.

Now, after years of leadership under his belt, he didn’t know how to be anyone else but the sharp, authoritative unit chief.

Especially after Haley.

(As he had stood in front of the freshly dug grave, he swore that his family would never meet SSA Hotchner, Unit Chief, Agent No-Smile Hardass, if he could help it.)

(The moment he stepped through the front door, he would only be Dad.)

(And in front of a select group of people, he would be Aaron, the man who was just barely toeing the line between profiler and unsub in his jaggedly broken, near-unhinged protectiveness.)

And so he received each act of insubordination from the team, no matter the magnitude, with unflappable calmness, even as he stayed late and went to work hours early to deal with the towering stacks of paperwork that joined the already existing piles of budget expansion requests and case consults.

He trusted their judgment, even if that trust didn’t go both ways.

“You’re very respected, you know that?” Strauss suddenly commented. “It’s the only reason you’ve been able to cover for your team for so long.”

That was something Hotch knew very well. Much as he hated it, he often found himself in the midst of political maneuverings that embroiled his higher-ups, aided especially by his upbringing and law school education. In these circles, where everyone knew everyone wore masks to hide unsavory secrets, there was some degree of grudging respect for everyone, no matter their placement on either side of the aisle. Even those who came from money had to have special acumen in order to make it this far in the cutthroat world of DC politics.

Hotch had gained quite the reputation as a prosecutor in DC, and not just because his father had been a well-known attorney with high-profile clients. Coupled with his meteoric rise through the ranks of the bureau, helping out the right people and collecting numerous contacts and favors along the way, it was no wonder that he had managed to keep the team out of the line of fire for so long.

More and more often, however, he was questioning his decisions to reject each opportunity to move up the chain of command, to instead stay with the team as a field agent. Even though he could almost always understand the reasoning behind each act of insubordination—hell, he even encouraged it sometimes—he couldn’t help but want for things to be different, especially with every night he went home too late and every time he pulled out the concealer he had always had near him since childhood to cover up the bruise-like eyebags that found a permanent home on his face.

But in the end, Hotch didn’t even have a choice.

(But a small part of him knew that this was always how he was going to go.)

Really, he understood why they did what they did. Ten years ago, he would have done the same thing himself.

Now, however, he couldn’t afford to put Jack’s safety and wellbeing on the line.

Some might say that Jack was his weak spot, and they wouldn’t be wrong—he would wholeheartedly agree with them.

He couldn't find it in him to feel guilty about putting his family ahead of all else, but what JJ said when he called them into his office after the fiasco had cut deeply.

You of all people should understand, JJ had spat in his face, and every harsh word he was about to say himself, reprimanding them for callous insubordination to the highest degree, died on his lips. He wasn’t sure how much time passed as he just stood there in silent, pained shock, but it didn’t take long for JJ, Prentiss, and Reid to leave his office with an air of vindication, not sparing him another glance.

Hotch had spent the rest of the day fielding call after call, trying to piece together the exact course of events and fending off the sharks smelling blood in the water.

The bloody chunks of flesh of the three agents who died immediately in the blast, the two who didn’t even make it into the operating room, and the one adult hostage who couldn’t far enough away in time.

Now, sitting across from Strauss and staring into his empty glass, he wondered if things would have been different if he had gotten there faster, adding his own input in formulating a negotiation strategy that factored in the variables he only knew to take into account because of his combined years in prosecution and SWAT and because of Boston.

Especially Boston.

(He already considered all of the what-ifs. He knew that short of suddenly gaining time travel or teleportation abilities, he couldn’t have done anything.)

But maybe he foresaw his current situation the moment he saw Strauss’s emailed request for an urgent meeting the morning after he worked late into the night trying to control the fallout.

Just budget meetings with the higher up of higher-ups, he reassured Morgan when they bumped into each other as Hotch and Strauss made their way out of the Academy offices towards the parking garage. He knew Morgan didn’t believe him—he was wearing the suit that he reserved for black tie events and meetings on the Hill, for one—but there was a reluctant acceptance and a hint of knowing in his eyes.

(Of course, Morgan had an idea of what was going on. No one in the country was ignorant of what had happened yesterday afternoon. As he was looking through the news coverage, confused and horrified as to how something like this could have happened, memories of Boston rose to the forefront of his mind, and he knew that this would end in blood.)

(Then Hotch called him in a frenzy, apologizing profusely for bothering him on his weekend off while all but begging for him to look after Jack for the rest of the day. It was an easy decision. Morgan took Jack to the movie theater, helped him with biking, took him out for ice cream, whatever it took to keep Jack happy and occupied while he himself worried over the state of things at the office.)

(It was well past midnight when Hotch finally fell into a restless sleep in bed next to Morgan, who had a standing invitation to stay overnight and was trying to help him loosen up his tensed muscles.)

“I’m coming into the office tomorrow to tie up loose ends,” Hotch suddenly told Strauss. “I’m not going to pull a Gideon. They don’t deserve that.”

He said as much next day as he stood in the bullpen, looking out at the agents he had worked with for years as he made his announcement.

“After careful consideration, I have decided to retire from the BAU,” he ignored the sounds of shock that rippled through the crowd, “and with my retirement, I am cutting all official ties with the Bureau.”

He carefully avoided looking at the team as he continued. “Please respect that I would prefer to not discuss the details of my retirement at this time, but I will say that this recent case had a lot to do with my decision,” he swept a stern gaze around the room, ignoring the pang in his heart and sudden burning in his eyes when he accidentally made eye contact with a devastated-looking Garcia.

Hotch quickly looked away and continued with his goodbyes before he managed to find an out to retreat to his office, where he picked up the last box of his belongings. It’s surprisingly light, he thought distantly as he took in the stripped office for the last time.

Oh, right, Strauss had helped me pack everything else and bring home the law books and framed certificates after we went out for drinks last night.

There was a knock on the door.

“Come in.”

The door opened, and Strauss stepped inside, shutting the door behind her and closing the blinds to give them some modicum of privacy from the profilers waiting in the bullpen with their barrage of questions.

“This is it, then,” she commented, eyes on the badge and gun that was left on the expansive desk.

Hotch nodded. “I’m sure the suits will be sweeping through my reports and cases soon enough. The team will find out then.” He turned to meet her gaze, an unreadable glint in his eyes, “But I daresay we will be seeing each other quite soon, however.”

They grasped each other’s hand firmly, something unspoken passing between them. There was a beat of stillness, then Hotch let go. He opened the office door and swept past her, past the team, and into the elevator with his phone already next to his ear, his professional mask back as he left this part of his life behind.

Strauss walked out onto the catwalk, looking out into the bullpen at the profilers sitting at their desks, shell-shocked at the man’s sudden (and all-too-final) departure.

Truthfully, Strauss didn’t know what he meant when he hinted that he would be seeing her (and presumably the team) again soon, but she assumed it had to do with the closed meeting he was pulled into the moment he arrived at the office this morning. She may not be trained to notice the details in human behavior, but she could tell there was a peaceful ease to Hotch’s goodbye that shouldn’t have been there, in addition to the strange lack of the bitterness she knew had been there last night when they went out for drinks.

“Erin, what the hell was that about?” Rossi’s voice shook her out of her thoughts. She turned to the approaching agent, game face back on and preparing to finally unleash the full scope of what had happened over a week ago onto the remaining profilers, who had been shielded from the consequences by Hotch’s presence and tireless negotiations alone.

Whatever Rossi was about to say next was suddenly cut off by an outraged “What?” coming from Morgan, who had been all but interrogating Prentiss, JJ, and Reid about the guilt was practically painted all over their expressions. Now, he ran out of the bullpen, chasing after Hotch and ignoring the calls of his name behind him.

Strauss watched all of this calmly; Hotch had asked that one of the team be made unit chief after his departure, but there was no way she was letting that happen on her watch. Especially based on Morgan’s determined chase after the now-former unit chief, she imagined she would be having two open positions to fill.

It was about time those two got their heads out of their asses, she thought, smiling internally.

May you find your peace, Aaron Hotchner.

#aaron hotchner #criminal minds #derek morgan #erin strauss #emily prentiss #jennifer jareau #penelope garcia #spencer reid #david rossi #jj slander #emily slander #reid slander #probably #bau #tw alcohol #tw violence #tw death

[buoyantsaturn]

So Come On, Talk it Out (your voice brought me back from the dead) (1/1)

summary: A relaxing date between Nico and Will the spring before Tower of Nero.

word count: 2616

read on ao3

The air was finally warming up late that spring. The snow had all melted a few weeks back, but it had still been too cold to stay outside for more than an hour or two. It definitely hadn’t been warm enough for a pseudo-picnic under the shade of a tree, but now it finally was. And it would probably be their only chance to do so before summer rolled in and brought a hundred kids back to camp. 

Nico had kicked off his shoes and socks before laying his head down in Will’s lap as the son of Apollo sat upright against the trunk of the tree. Nico planted his feet firmly in the grass, and Will cringed at the sight. 

“You’re just going to stick your feet in the grass like that?” he asked.

Nico shrugged as best he could in his current position. “Yeah, so what? It makes me feel more...grounded, more connected to everything.” 

Will snorted. “Yeah, connected to feeling like you’ve got bugs crawling over your feet.” 

“That doesn’t even make sense.” 

Will poked him in the forehead. “You don’t make sense.” Nico snatched Will’s hand away and brought it toward his mouth, biting down gently on the side of Will’s hand before Will could rip it away. “Hey! I thought we agreed on a nice, relaxing date! Relaxing does not include biting.”

Nico reached up and squished the tip of Will’s nose down with a single finger. “No, you agreed on a relaxing date. I already took you on one last week.” 

Will scoffed, and swatted at Nico’s hand. “Almost dropping me in a vat of Cheez Whiz in Venezuela is not relaxing! And I ran out of KitKats, so you couldn’t even get your energy up enough to bring us back here!” 

A smile started to creep its way onto Nico’s face, and he started to brush his fingers across Will’s cheek. “I still can’t believe you committed a crime for me.” 

“Well, what was I supposed to do?” Will demanded, waving his arms frantically. “They wouldn’t accept my drachmas and didn’t speak English, and you--! You couldn’t even open your eyes long enough to see where we were! What was I supposed to do, not steal a few KitKats?”

Nico’s smile was full blown as he gazed up at Will with hearts in his eyes. “So you agree: best date ever, and I win.” 

Will started to laugh - a little bit in shock that Nico would even think that, but also finding it hard not to crack up at the absurdity of their conversation. What other fifteen year old had ever stolen KitKats from some shop in Venezuela to restore his significant other’s magic powers so that they could teleport back home? He almost sounded crazy!

“No,” Will told him, still laughing. “Not the best date ever! And definitely not relaxing! I wanted to, like, sit together like this, and maybe share some snacks and play twenty questions. Not run from cops in Venezuela.”

Nico’s nose scrunched up - something Will had recently learned his did when he was confused - and Will wanted to kiss the wrinkles away. “Why would we play twenty questions?”

“To get to know each other. Duh.” 

Nico tipped his head back and met Will’s eyes, frowning slightly. “Do we...not already know each other?” 

“Well, we do,” Will replied, his head tipping to the side, “but not everything. I don’t even know your middle name.” 

“Yeah, so? I don’t know yours either.” 

Will grinned. “And that’s why we play! Tell me your middle name.” 

Nico rolled his eyes, but answered, “Vincenzo.” 

Will hummed. “Nico Vincenzo di Angelo… I know you’re Italian, Death Boy, but that’s a lot of o’s.”

Nico pursed his lips and turned his head away, gazing out toward the lake. After a moment, he said, “Actually it’s… Niccolo Vincenzo di Angelo.” 

“Your name is Niccolo? That’s so cute!” Will repeated the name to himself a few times in his head, and then gasped. “Like piccolo! Oh my gods, Nico, can I call you piccolo?” 

Nico leveled him with a glare so strong that it could’ve made flowers wilt on the spot, but Will didn’t so much as flinch. “Absolutely not.” 

Will lifted a hand and started to brush his fingers through Nico’s hair. He leaned into the touch, despite how angry he was pretending to be. “Okay, so only in private, then.” 

“No! Never!” 

Will simply continued to smile down at him, carding his fingers through Nico’s hair and gently releasing tangles in the curls. He wondered if Nico’s hair would curl up even more if it was shorter, but they’d both gotten fond of the length. “It’s your turn to ask,” Will reminded him softly after a few short moments of silence. 

Nico crossed his arms with a huff, and looked away again - though only with his eyes this time, as though not to dislodge Will’s hand from his head. “Same question.” 

Will hesitated. “Can you call me piccolo?”

At least Will’s brief moment of stupidity brought a smile back to Nico’s face. “No, your middle name.” 

“Oh! It’s Andrew. William Andrew Solace.” 

Nico repeated the name, whispering it to himself, and Will felt his heart skip a beat at the sound. Then, Nico’s hand searched out Will’s - the one that wasn’t twirling curls around his fingers - and laced their fingers together. He met Will’s eyes as he said, “William Andrew Solace, I want you to know that if you ever betray me, I will use your full name to embarrass you as payback.” 

Will’s smile only brightened. “Why would I ever betray you?” 

Nico shrugged again. “You might not even realize it when it happens. I’m not talking about any big stakes. I mean, like… Like if Sherman’s on the lava course, and you don’t tell me so I can avenge my loss against him. That’s a betrayal.” 

“You really are kind of a sore loser, huh.” 

“I am not!”

Will nodded. “Uh huh. Okay, Piccolo.” 

Nico ripped his hand out of Will’s and used it to smack at his arm. “Shut up!”

With his hand now free, Will was able to reach into the backpack he’d brought with him, and pulled out a clementine. He took away his other hand, causing Nico to sigh in disappointment, though Will didn’t tease him for it. If the sudden blush on his face was anything to go by, then Nico hadn’t intended to make a sound at all. Will laid one arm across Nico’s chest, the other held over Nico’s head as he reached around him to peel the clementine. 

“Where was the first place you shadow traveled to?” Will asked. 

Nico paused to think, one of his hands coming up almost subconsciously to curl his fingers around Will’s arm. “Uh, China, I think? I don’t really remember. I kinda...jumped, and then immediately passed out. I think Minos said I was out for, like, three days, and then I just jumped back.” 

“You went all the way to China? And you didn’t bring any KitKats?” 

Nico pinched his arm. “We just learned about the KitKat thing a month ago, Will. Whatever. Um, did you have any pets before you came to camp?” 

Will grinned at the change of subject. “I did! I had a golden retriever, and her name was Sandy.” He dropped the clementine peel into the grass and broke the fruit into pieces. He took one small piece and held it out for Nico.

“No thanks,” Nico told him.

“You haven’t eaten since yesterday,” Will reminded him.

“I went without eating for a week when I was in that jar.” 

“Yeah, and I wish you would stop reminding me of that, because it just makes me want to feed you even more. So, open up!” 

Nico rolled his eyes, but allowed his mouth to drop open so that Will could feed him the slice of clementine. Nico’s face scrunched up as he chewed. “It’s kinda sour.” 

Will ate his own slice, and shrugged. “Not really. You just haven’t eaten a fruit in over a year and forgot what it’s supposed to taste like.”

“Uh, pomegranates are fruit, and I--”

“Ate those in the jar, I know,” Will cut in, “but you were in a trance and probably didn’t even taste them, so that doesn’t count.” 

Nico huffed. “Whatever.” Still, he opened his mouth when Will placed another slice of clementine at his lips. 

“Have you ever thought about getting a tattoo?” Will asked.

Nico shook his head, gently rolling it back and forth over Will’s thigh. “Nah, I’ve been stabbed with a knife before and that wasn’t great, so I don’t think I need to get stabbed with a thousand tiny needles. Why, have you?” 

Will frowned. “Okay, we’re going to circle back to that later, but yes, I have.”

“What were you thinking of getting?” 

Will moved the few remaining clementine pieces into one hand, and placed the other on Nico’s chest. He drew a circle with his finger directly over Nico’s heart and said, “Right here, I want to get a sun.” 

“Why’s that? Are you afraid people won’t think you’re sunshiney enough because of the...everything about you?” 

Will flicked him in the chest, right in the center of the circle he’d drawn. He smiled as he lifted his gaze out toward the lake - he was worried about something, Nico could tell that much just by looking at him.

“I’ve been thinking about my dad a lot recently,” Will started, his voice hushed as though he was sharing a secret. “I haven’t heard from him in so long and I’m...worried about what’s going to happen if he doesn’t make it. I’m worried about the state of the world, first and foremost, don’t get me wrong, but… What about me? Do I lose everything? Will I still be able to heal? Or use any of my other powers?” 

He dropped his gaze again, eyes focused on the spot on Nico’s chest where his fingers had started to circle again. “So I want that tattoo as, like, a way to remember him, and a way to remember that part of myself, just in case things don’t go as planned.” 

Nico covered Will’s hand with his own, and brought it up to his lips so that he could press a kiss to his knuckles. “Whatever happens, you’ll always be my sunshine.” 

Will smiled at him sweetly and said, “Who are you, and what have you done with my significant annoyance?”

Nico huffed and threw Will’s hand away. “Way to ruin the moment.” 

“Just ask me another question, would you?” Will asked, and popped another piece of clementine into his mouth. There was just one left - he’d give it to Nico.

“It’s not my turn,” Nico told him.

“Oh, yeah.” Will fed him the clementine and tipped his head back against the tree as he thought. “What’s your favorite movie?” 

“I dunno, I don’t watch a lot of movies,” Nico replied. “I don’t really have the attention span for that, so I haven’t seen...any?” 

Will’s jaw dropped. “You haven’t seen Star Wars?”

Nico hesitated. “Uh, no? I think Percy said I didn’t need to see it anyway, because there’s apparently some other Star-something movies that are better.” 

“Star Trek?” Will shrieked. “Absolutely not! The Apollo cabin is a Star Wars family, and I will not stand for this kind of slander. For our next date, we’re watching the original trilogy.” 

“Woah, hang on a second!” Nico held up his thumb between them. “First of all, I get to pick our next date.” He raised his index finger. “Second, I just said I can’t even sit through one movie, and you want me to watch three? I don’t think so.” He added his middle finger. “And third-- Uh, no actually, I don’t think I have a third point.” 

“Okay, then two dates from now, we’ll watch Episode Four, and then another two dates later, we’ll watch Episode Five--”

“Why wouldn’t we start with the first episode?” Nico asked. “Wait, and I thought these were movies. Actually, no, never mind. Whatever, as long as it makes you happy.” 

Will smiled. “It will.” 

“So, I assume that’s your favorite movie.” 

Will hummed an affirmative. He started to stroke Nico’s hair once again, and Nico’s eyes slipped shut at the feeling. “You gotta ask me another question,” Will whispered. 

Nico cracked one eye open. “I just did.” 

“That wasn’t a question, it was an assumption. And besides, I can’t think of another one, so you go.” 

Nico rolled his eyes. “Oh, like I can? This game was your idea, Solace.” He let his eyes fall shut again, though there was a tiny wrinkle between his brows that let Will know he was trying to think. “What other powers do you have?”

Will tapped his fingers against Nico’s skull a few times, and then resumed playing with his hair. “Well, you know about the healing, and my sonic whistle. And, uh, I don’t know if this is a power, really, but I’m good at calming people down. And I can, um.” He cleared his throat, and Nico opened his eyes to see that Will was looking everywhere and anywhere that wasn’t at Nico. “Glow. So what other powers do you have?” 

Nico sat up instantly. “Hang on, did you just say you can glow?” He turned to face Will, clutching his hands in his own and demanding, “Show me!” 

Will’s cheeks were turning pink, and he still wouldn’t meet Nico’s eyes. “It’s-- I can’t, it’s too bright out here, so you wouldn’t be able to see it anyway, and… I dunno, it’s embarrassing.” 

“No way, it’s not embarrassing, it’s cool. Just show me!” 

Will sighed, and his eyes flickered up to meet Nico’s for just a second before he looked away again. “Fine, but only for a second. Can you try to make it a bit darker? It’ll show up better that way.” 

Nico released Will’s hands and dropped his own to the ground. The shadow of the tree they sat under stretched and darkened, and the air around them grew cold enough that Nico wished he had a jacket. Will started to take off his flannel shirt, and Nico was half-tempted to reach out for it and put it on himself when he saw Will hold out his arms and close his eyes. A moment later, his skin turned from bronze to gold, each of his freckles acting as little flashlights to let the light escape from beneath Will’s skin.

Nico grinned. “That’s so cool!” 

Will let the glow fade, and he pulled his flannel back on as Nico released his hold on the shadow. “It’s really nothing special,” Will muttered.

“Yes it is!” Nico insisted, waving his arms around for emphasis. “I have my own personal glow-in-the-dark boyfriend!” 

Will’s head snapped up, his eyes locking on Nico’s as his jaw dropped open again. “Did you… Did you just say boyfriend?”

Nico’s cheeks had developed a bit of their own blush, but he refused to look away. “I… Yeah, I did. Is that okay?” 

Will beamed, reaching out for one of Nico’s hands to lace their fingers together. “That’s so okay. That’s more than okay! Does that mean I can start calling you my boyfriend now, too?”

Nico let a smile creep onto his lips. “Nah, you’re my boyfriend, but I’m still your significant annoyance.” 

Will rolled his eyes, but nothing would be able to take that smile off his face. He tugged on Nico’s hand to pull him close and press a kiss to his cheek. “You got that right.” 

thanks for reading!!

buy me a coffee | come talk to me if you need a distraction!

#solangelo #will solace #nico di angelo #mine #my writing #ton spoilers

[tenmillionwhumperflies]

Cloudwalker Series Part 29

Alright, part 29 is done, and you can have some cheeky Rhix whump.

Warnings: Mentions/brief descriptions of murder, brief part on previous eye whump and descriptions of it, mentions of nsfw and a non-con assumption, but it does not happen.

Approx WC: 3500

Taglist: @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi, @thegreathowdini Seeing the castle of Everblood come into view, the enormous towers and mighty walls, the ragged eerie flags that hung lifelessly in the cold air, seeing the old battle scars where the castle had survived attack after attack didn't quite give Avizon the comfort he'd expected it to have despite longing to return- and it wasn't because he was out in the open. He didn't feel like he could be safe anymore. He feared an attack from unseen enemies at any moment. He willed the metal gates to open until he was through and then slam shut behind him. He doubted it would be enough anymore. Maybe Orrien was right; he'd become too dependent on walls and stone despite his claims he was the most powerful in the land.

He set to work on unloading the supplies and tending to Secret, brushing her coat, feeding her and getting her settled for the evening. He smiled at his birds once the work was done and let them do as they wished for a while until dinner. He'd hunted some rabbit along the way so their dinners were sorted. He didn't really feel like eating after killing that man. He'd deserved it for causing such pain, but Avizon still felt like a monster, he still felt out of control. He did wish he could give up his power, but he just didn't have the courage. He knew what he was with that power, but what would he be without it...

He sighed, thinking back to the time where he'd returned to this castle years ago after his wounds eventually healed, after he'd lost Ro and been found after weeks of torture. He'd kidnapped the king with ease, teleporting in, grabbing him from his bed, and teleporting out. It had been that simple. He'd forced him down on the stone altar despite his cowardly begging and pleading.

Oh, the riches and powers he had promised him, wealth beyond measure, the ability to pick any man in the land to replace Ro and Halve would make sure he was able to have him as he wished, fine steeds, castles and servants to command. As if Ro was some cheap toy! As if everything he'd suffered through was so quickly washed away. He'd stared him in the eyes and stabbed him clean through the heart, giving him the sacrifice he'd needed to be able to inherit the dark powers that had soon controlled him.

That had been the easy part, but the sacrifice he had to personally give in exchange had been his eye. That pain had been unlike anything he'd ever felt, the heavy rotting, burning sensation. He didn't like taking off his patch. He hated seeing his eye, how it was black as coal, weepy and so painful whenever light reached it. It did nothing to stop him feeling like a monster. Sometimes it still hurt, the heavy burning withering feeling returned and nothing could ease the pain…

He'd taken over the palace in a rage after that. He'd given the innocents the chance to leave, Orrien helped see to that. Avizon had been left with the scum, and their screams still echoed in his mind. He didn't fully regret what he'd done. Especially to the princess. Eriona had deserved it and so much more. Not just because of what she did to him, but to her two cloudwalkers. Fluffy and Flutter had suffered just as much as he had, perhaps worse at times.

He wanted to find them as soon as he could. Now he was finding himself again, he wanted to give them a chance at happiness. He should have remembered them, he should have cared more. He'd remembered to save Rhix before he drowned in darkness, but he hadn't been able to remember the birds. Back then he was a different man and didn't view them as well as he should have. He'd hated their suffering of course, but he hadn't considered them to be so human… but things were different now.

If they were out there. He would find them and give them the chance to be safe from harm.

Avizon sighed, thoughts wandering to Rhix. Rhix had been a good friend before he'd taken over the castle. Avizon had been the only one Rhix had dared tell about how the King, Kellis, treated him, how he suffered and was constantly being humiliated, treated like some common entertainer. His castle had been almost as bad as Avizon's. Avizon had saved him from that, giving him the chance to grow into a more confident young man. He'd saved him, and it hurt to think all the circle saw him as a truly evil. But Orrien's words gave him hope. Maybe Rhix hadn't completely given up on him…

-----

Avizon struggled within his own skin as he sat on the throne in the gallery. Sometimes twirling a small parchment around in his fingers, other times scrunching it up, waiting impatiently for his 'guests' to arrive. He'd sent a message days ago, a message to the neighboring kingdom where Rhix 'served'. In his hand he held their cowardly answer.

Surrender your sorcerer, Rhixius, to me, alive and well. If you do not bring him, your kingdom will be next to fall. It is my one and only demand.

It was no surprise when a message had been returned quickly. They'd given him up, without even thinking about the possibilities of what Avizon could do with dark magic and a sorcerer with containment talent. Fortunately for them he wasn't interested in that, though the darkness inside certainly was. For now Avizon could only wait for them to bring him. He'd managed to fight the dark part of him that wanted to tell the king he knew his secrets, how they treated Rhix, and send all his rage at him. But he feared that they would harm him for telling someone. Avizon wanted Rhix alive and well and there was no point in risking that.

He felt the presence of men in his domain. He could feel Rhix was with them, but his powers were… weak, incredibly so. As if he'd been sapped of all his energy. He crushed the paper in his hand. If they'd leeched him then so help him…

The men carefully made their way to the throne room. Avizon barely managed to tuck away his shock. He'd expected for Rhix to have resisted, to be bound, but this was different.

Rhixius had been a pitiful sight, his hands were bound in front of him with rough ropes and he was shirtless, covered with shining jewelry and silky baggy pants. His body was littered in bruises and scratches. Avizon wondered how much he'd struggled on the way here. They really thought he wanted Rhix as a partner. No doubt Rhix was terrified. He didn't suppress the growl that rose in his throat, seeing Rhix's pale skin, the old scars and signs of torment, new and old.

He'd been gagged and blindfolded, and was so unaware of what was going on around him. He swayed, but Avizon wasn't sure if that was because of the blindfold or not. Rhix whimpered when they forced him to a halt and shoved him down on his knees. He groaned and struggled not to fall forward. A hand in his hair ensured he couldn't.

"We brought your whore," one man sneered. Avizon brought fire to his hands and glared. "Repeat those words." The man gulped and let go of Rhix, backing away and bowing. "I… I.I thought that you- I didn't- I beg your forgiveness-"

Avizon had already hurdled a ball of fire at him, hitting him hard in the shoulder. The man screamed and rolled around the floor, trying to put out the flames. The flames tore through the clothes quickly and chewed at his skin until he managed to put the last if it out, panting, sobbing. Avizon didn't care.

Rhix tensed up, bracing for pain. Avizon saw how he ducked his head down, trying to seem as small as possible. Avizon didn't want to scare him too. He'd clearly been through enough. The others deserved to suffer. He clenched his fists.

"Do not speak of this man as though he were nothing," Avizon snarled. "One word from him seeking revenge and I will destroy every last brick of your kingdom!” "B.but we have your word you will not attack our kingdom or any other?" The leader spoke up carefully.

"It's true I have what I wanted. But I will not deny Rhixius the chance of revenge if his heart desires. You'd best pray he is far more forgiving than I. If I am left alone and Rhixius chooses peace, then you've nothing to fear. But if I ever hear-" Avizon summoned a wave of dark magic, the deepest he could feel at the time which engulfed the room in darkness.

From the shadows, hands reached out and grabbed all the men, restraining them. He brought fire to his hands and approached the leader slowly, bringing the fire closer and closer to his sweating face. "-that the king is using another man and hurts him as he did Rhix I will not hesitate." Avizon clenched his fists again to put the fire out, ignoring how his hands went numb for now.

"I… I will inform him of your conditions, my Lord." The men bowed, fear radiated off their bodies. Avizon stood and snatched the rope from him that was connected to a collar around Rhix's neck. He let the magic disappear in the blink of an eye and his body felt so heavy from it. His eye throbbed, but he let the pain fuel his anger for now.

"Out."

That had been enough for them to flee, as if they'd never even been there.

Avizon's attention turned to Rhixius. He struggled with his dark side, he could feel it churning inside him. He circled his trembling form. Part of him wanted to savour the sight, but the rest of him was appalled at the thought, yet unable to stop himself. He felt like a puppet. He grabbed Rhix by the chin and made him look up. Rhixius whimpered. Avizon groaned trying to beat his urges back. He let go and Rhix's head dropped forward limply.

He wanted him. He wanted a pet, a servant, something to be dependent on him and to have complete control over. Rhix would be perfect- He was able to break out of it when he saw Rhix sway badly. He slumped forward with a groan and Avizon's body acted without his mind. He caught him and pulled him close to his chest protectively. No. Rhix was a friend. He would not hurt him! He had to protect him, even from himself.

Avizon was stunned at just how cold he was. He reached for his blindfold. Rhix yelped and flinched away. "Shhh, be at ease." Avizon continued, sliding the white material up, revealing what really were beautiful iridescent eyes. Rhix blinked hard to adjust before he stared up in shock. Avizon ignored him and carefully eased the gag out of his mouth. He cupped his cheek to support his jaw.

"There… I always swore to you that I would save you from that place. I have done so."

"A.Avizon… why…" tears shone in his eyes. "Why did you turn to the shadows… y.you were free…" "Because I wasn't strong enough," his voice harsh like sandpaper. "I couldn't protect him."

"Ro? Avizon, that wasn't your fault…" Avizon shook his head. "I don't expect you to understand. I'm not important. Where is your power?.. Did they use a leech?" "N.No… I. I breathed in powder… they found a way of blocking it for hours at a time… I… I don't know how it's made."

Avizon took a deep breath. He felt better, being closer to him, closer to light magic. It was easier to think clearly, but it made his eye hurt more. Avizon hissed and covered it with a hand.

"Let's get you a bath, a meal, and bed," he managed.

Avizon started to free his hands but Rhix whimpered "Is that why I'm here? What the other man said, what they've all been saying…"

"No." His voice was firm. Solid. "I swore I would free you and I found a way of doing so. It's true that I… I want you to stay, as a friend, so I can protect you but… I already know you wouldn't want that. I'm dangerous now, and the best way to keep you safe would be if you weren't here. Once your powers have returned, I can only beg of you to go to the spire. They should be able to do what I cannot."

Rhix's expression was hard to read. Relief, worry, shock. Avizon gave up trying to understand it. He sighed. "Can you walk?" Rhixius nodded hesitantly. "I think so?"

Avizon managed to put his own pain aside and carefully helped him up, teleporting him upstairs. Using his powers, keeping the darkness flowing, made it easier to control the urges. He sat Rhix down on the side of a bed for now. Rhix only frowned and reached up slowly for Avizon's face. "What happened to your eye?"

Avizon turned his face away. "It… was sacrificed, let's say. It's not a pretty sight. Hopefully time will ease the pain." "May I see? Perhaps I can help?" "I doubt it…"

He let Rhix reach up with trembling fingers and ease the eyepatch away. He winced at the sight. It was dark magic for sure. The eye was pitch black, weepy, and looked almost like stone or charred wood. The surrounding skin was practically purple as the darkness had made its way into the surrounding capillaries. It was a terrible mess, and Avizon despised it.

"Avizon…" but words would not come to him. "Please let go of this magic before it's too late. Let go of it a.and I'll stay. I swear it. You'll have enough power to stay safe with me. You don't need it."

Avizon shook his head and moved Rhix's hands away, feeling another wave of darkness. "I can't. I am sorry…" "But it could kill-"

Avizon's mind slipped. He grabbed Rhix by the throat before he could stop himself. Rhix tried to bring magic to his hands on instinct, but nothing happened. Fear glowed in his eyes. 

"The magic stays," Avizon hissed. "Unless you care for a share of it too? We could rule together, be unstoppable, and reshape the world in our image."

Rhix brought his elbow down hard to force Avizon to let go. He coughed hard and shook his head. "I. I don't want that. Take a look at yourself! You can't control it! It's not meant to be controlled. Avizon, please do not go down this path, I'll do anything. Let me help you, let me at least stop it from destroying my friend!" Tears pooled in his eyes.

Avizon groaned and fell back against the wall, clutching his head. He looked up at him and whimpered. "I am so sorry. I.I'll go before I really hurt you… I'm sorry, Rhix. I never wanted this." Avizon rushed away, keeping his hands close to his body. What had he done?!

---

Avizon wished he'd taken Rhix up on that offer. Maybe he'd have been happy with a friend by his side, but there was no point thinking about it. He'd made his decision and had been miserable and alone.

Avizon finished up at the stables and found Dyan's dreamcatcher still hanging up in the cart where he'd first stored it. He'd have to put it up for him before night fell. He sighed, took it down, and went to the birds' room.

He found Dyan laying glumly in bed. He sighed softly. "What's wrong, Dyan?" "Nothing really. Just… I miss Blue. This place is so big that it makes me feel more lonely…" "I understand that feeling all too well. You can stay in the tower today with me if you like?"

Dyan nodded and rubbed his eyes. He watched Avizon put the dreamcatcher up in the window. "There, that ought to help you," Avizon smiled.

"Thank you, master, for doing so much for me a.and buying me nice things. I'm the luckiest cloudwalker in the world to be by your side." That caught Avizon off guard a little. He smiled softly and ruffled his hair. "Thank you, Dyan. Now let's get going. I need to study the venom I collected from Tashka."

Dyan sat sleepily beside Avizon, resting against his knee, drifting off to sleep with his head against him. Avizon smiled and left him to rest, for now focusing on his work. He needed to know what had happened, to know just what Borgurk was planning. Tashka had certainly been right. The magic he could feel in the venom certainly belonged to Borgurk. That scum had lingered in the shadows unsupervised for far too long, ever since Avizon had fought him. In truth, Avizon wished and had even thought him dead. It scared him to know he could come back. He had loved ones he could lose again…

He was still working when Dyan woke up from his rather long nap. He startled awake with a loud cheep before flopping back down against his master's leg. "It's alright, little bird. Bad dream?" "I'm not sure.. I think I was being chased."

"Are you well enough for me to ask for a little of your venom, for comparison?"

Dyan gulped but nodded and got up on his knees. He opened his mouth and waited. Avizon was patient as he massaged behind his ear, sometimes a little rougher than what was relaxing, but it worked. Venom dripped and Avizon collected it. Avizon had what he needed. He patted Dyan's hair and invited him to lie down again.

Dyan peeked over the top of the table to see what his master was doing. He was surprised by all the bottles and tools and devices.

"I don't like this at all…" Avizon mumbled. "Borgurk's up to something terrible… Dyan, I don't want you or Ihuka leaving the magic circle that surrounds this castle, you understand? Something dark and dangerous is afoot."

"Yes, master."

Avizon wished he knew what but until Borgurk played his hand he feared he wouldn't know. Of course he realised Borgurk was interfering with cloudwalker magic, probably to make himself stronger but… Then what? Did he have a target in mind? A goal? That's where he was less sure. He needed to prepare, take measures to protect everyone…

"Master?" Dyan said softly, breaking Avizon out of his thoughts. "Are… are you alright? Can I help?..." Avizon looked down and smiled at him. He stroked his hair lovingly. "You already are helping. Good bird. Are you feeling better?"

Dyan nodded and decided to hug Avizon's leg.

"I wonder where Ihuka wandered off to… its almost dinner time. This can wait a little while, I need time to think. Come, let's go find him." Dyan let go and waited for his master to stand before he rose up off the floor. "Maybe he's at his favourite window?"

"You go search there and then your room. I'll wander until I can sense him."

And so he wandered, Dyan returned without Ihuka and Avizon frowned in mild confusion. He knew Ihuka was still in the grounds. He wasn't worried, just curious.

He didn't expect to find him sitting at the top of one of the towers, looking out at the immense view, hugging his knees with the stuffed toy Avizon had bought him.

Avizon approached noisily so as to not startle him. Ihuka turned quickly, likely not sure if he was in trouble or not. "Good bird," Avizon said softly, hoping to ease that anxiety as soon as he could. Ihuka visibly relaxed and went back to looking at the view.

"It's dinner time… Ihuka? Anyone in there?" Ihuka seemed lost in thought, in emotion. He stared out into the world and… longed? Grieved perhaps?

Ihuka flinched when Avizon carefully touched his shoulder. "You miss your brother?" "Sorry, master," Ihuka said quickly. Avizon hushed him softly. "We'll find him. Let's get you fed now, alright? Dinner time."

Avizon ruffled his hair gently and then made his way down for a meal. Ihuka hugged Dyan when he saw him sitting at the table. Avizon was glad they had each other since they couldn't find much comfort with him. He really did wish he could do more, but as Orrien said, they needed time.

He hoped giving them some time back home away from everything would help all three of them. He knew fate was in motion, conflict was nearing and they needed the time to rest. If it didn't work, he didn't know what else he could do. 

#Cloudwalker series #whump #my writing #whump writing #Avizon #Rhix #Dyan #Ihuka #note to self #whump Rhix more

[darkpoisonouslove]

Shine a Light on Your Romance

Summary: Everything blooms in the Alfea greenhouse except for privacy as it turns out when Griffin and Faragonda try to take a moment to talk about the growth of their relationship.

This got a little crackish towards the end. I am just not good at writing light-hearted stuff.

“What did you want to show me?” Griffin’s golden eyes finally found her after she’d been gracing the translucent blue petals of a flower with their light for at least ten minutes now. Faragonda could have sworn she’d been trying to hypnotize it into hopping out of the ground and abandoning Alfea to walk into Cloud Tower instead. An awful lot of effort instead of just asking for it. As if Faragonda wouldn’t give her any and all of the plants surrounding them.

“That we can, in fact, have privacy here at Alfea.” Gardening was not the purpose of their visit to the greenhouse as much as it was a dream come true for both of them to stroll through the rich assortment of plants that could never be found together outside her doors. She’d been after the secluded atmosphere of that green paradise that hardly anyone visited and it’d be impossible to find them amidst the lush flora even if an entire class of students came looking for them.

“Really?” Griffin’s amused smile didn’t match the reactions she’d had to the people interrupting them during most of her visits to Alfea. “Are you sure?” her arched brow was much more subtle than the pokes of her questions.

“The chances of interference are very low.” Griselda was the only one that could find her. Luckily for them, she was also the only one that didn’t need her except for technicalities that Griselda never put off until the last moment. They had as much privacy as could be.

“Okay then,” Griffin circled her slowly to make her way to the pink lilies the shade of her hair a couple decades ago. “Is there anything else you wanted to tell me?” she stroked a petal languidly but her movements were deliberate, almost predatory with their seductiveness luring Faragonda to the honey of her eyes. And her smile made Faragonda’s heart race like a battle no longer could, nor any kind of fear. It wasn’t running from something, but rushing home.

“Yes.” She’d only spun less than a hundred and eighty degrees to keep Griffin in her sights, yet everything else was swirling around her in unfocused green spirals as if no other life existed except the soul in front of her. “I was infinitely grateful for having you back in my life as a friend, and I still am.” Griffin was still grounded in their shared garden but the playfulness was gone now to leave her eyes glimmering with anticipation and Faragonda had to be careful not to root out anything else. “I’ve never thought that I could want anything more because you’ve always been everything to me.” She offered her hand to melt in the warmth of Griffin taking it despite the fabric of her gloves in the way. “But I do want more. I want more time to spend with you and more chances to show you my love for you.”

Griffin’s eyes welled up with tears like Faragonda had poured an ocean on her. “Faragonda...” her voice fell through a crack in her wholeness that still persisted despite the fullness spilling from her.

Faragonda caught the water drops on her fingers before they could touch Griffin’s tender skin with any ugliness that might have spilled in the moment from the well Griffin kept buried in her mind. “You’re not just enough for me, Griffin. You are more than I could have imagined a person could be and I want all of you just as you are. All of the good and-”

“Just kiss me while I still have any air left,” Griffin’s words rasped through the atmosphere with desire instead of the suggested lack of breath.

“You sound fine to me but I’m here to give you everything you need.” Faragonda grinned at the theatric pout falling away from Griffin’s lips as fast as it had taken hold. It couldn’t have robbed them of their allure but seeing them parted to welcome her instead of oxygen was an unparalleled sight that no other beauty of nature could top. She had all the proof right there to frame how much she didn’t care about anything besides Griffin.

There were a couple inches left between her lips and the softness she’d imagined of Griffin’s that she could see melting away as the rush of Griffin’s breath swept her off her feet when a pulse of magic stung her senses to rip her out of the moment. The magical bond for tracking her in emergency situations was like a noose tightening around her neck with every pull on the other end.

Griselda.

She materialized a few feet away from the remains of the severed kiss deep in containment mode for whatever crisis had sent her after Faragonda’s whereabouts. “Faragonda...” she didn’t get further than a step forward when she looked up and took note of the surroundings as well as Faragonda’s company.

“What is it, Griselda?” she asked with little control over her own annoyance while she kept her gaze on Griffin out of the corner of her eye. She’d turned away, her gaze running over the greenery – whether to let it soothe her annoyance or to avoid eye contact after the intrusion on their intimacy.

“Never mind,” Griselda backed away, the movement drawing to her Griffin’s trademark death glare. So it hadn’t been embarrassment diverting her gaze. Good. “I’ll handle it. Sorry for that. Pretend it never happened,” Griselda had done the math as well.

“Are you sure?” The indignant energy of Griffin’s stare boring a hole in her now was the better option over her kicking Griselda out of the greenhouse. Literally.

“Of course. I can fix the time anomalies Alice and Clarice caused in class on my own, don’t worry.”

“What?” That was an emergency. But so was Griselda’s survival at the moment even if she was practically out of sight already.

“I have it under control. Go back to kissing Griffin. See you at breakfast, Griffin.”

“You’re still in my range,” Griffin half yelled after her and Griselda had the decency to let it go even though the bluff was easy to call. “I am done with your school,” Griffin grabbed Faragonda’s hand before she could defend Alfea’s good name and teleported them both out of there.

#winx club #winx faragonda #winx griffin #griffin x faragonda #fanfiction #my fanfiction #my writing #200fc

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 16

First time reader click here

Summary/TWs: Trouble is brewing. Canon-typical violence, graphic descriptions of wounds and Clint whump. Bad, terrible, no-good medical accuracy. Aliens. Reader is an anxious genius with low self-esteem and PTSD. ✨spicy sadness✨

From now on, chapters will be posted un-beta-ed. She's taking a lil break. 💖💝✨

I liked to think I had made peace with the fact that my boys and girls had one hell of a dangerous job. Natasha, Clint, Steve and Bucky frequently left for missions and while I missed their usual bickering in the background, it wasn't like the tower's common room became absolutely quiet. The fact that they mostly did recon-only missions helped, too, as they would come home unharmed and in one piece. The worry was there but subtle - like setting the table and including silverware for the people who were gone on a mission.

Peter's patrols went less smoothly, usually. He was small and even in his spider-suit, the boy was frequently underestimated by common thugs. Apparently, they didn't know how to read the news - it was blatantly obvious the hero was enhanced. And yet somehow, Pete more often than not sported all sorts of bruises, scratches and tears.

Tony and I routinely tore out our hair over the spiderboy's carelessness. The engineer had a funny way of showing he cared for Peter. Once I got to know him better, my brain dubbed them as Irondad and Spiderson. And it wasn't weird at all, somehow, that I was basically fucking my best friend's dad. Tony never made me uncomfortable, if anything, he went to great lengths to accommodate my whims. Tony continuously found time for me, answered my dumb questions and soldiered through the shenanigans I got up to after having too much caffeine and too little sleep.

Sitting in the quiet, empty common room was unnerving. It was shortly after dinner time - the evening news skipped their usual political debate in favour of the battle that was raging downtown, the reason for my headache and wrung hands.

I missed Tony's running mouth. The aliens the team was fighting looked quite hilarious, murderous intentions aside, and I could only imagine the way Tony and Clint would mock them. Hentai rejects. Tentacle porn knock-offs. The aliens were squid-like, about half the size of a human and very, very slippery, from what I spied on the TV.

An irritated-looking Stephen had me equal parts apprehensive and drooling - one after another, he conjured up a series of small portals, teleporting the aggressive octopods only god knew where. It would have looked incredibly badass if not for the exhausted sheen of sweat I could see on his brow, even despite the camera footage being shaky and grainy.

The news footage showed Tony - Iron Man, soaring contentedly through the darkening skies and taking out the squirmy mass of tentacles with his plasma beam repulsors. Steve and Bucky and Loki appeared too, sporadically, being well-oiled murder machines. Nothing new.

Yet, I worried. The little worm of doubt was squirming full-force. I tried to ignore it, yet pacing, sitting and playing Candy Crush got me nowhere. I pestered Friday to order pizza, the team's usual post-mission order plus a large one for me - stress-eating was better than stress-popping-molly in a tower full of superheroes. It took some courage to admit to myself I'd gotten attached enough to be this much from running away from all that in a blind panic.

And it would be the best option for them, really, because they had much sensible things to worry about than me. Yet every time, my selfishness won against even the most logical arguments I presented. I hated fighting myself but it was all I did - not only I was in love with Tony, I loved him.

Even when he forgot about my existence for five days, to emerge from his workshop with a new piece of tech that revolutionised one or another or something else. I loved him when he annoyed the ever living fuck out of everybody, me included, because I knew that it was hilarious to see people getting riled up over totally trivial shit. I loved Tony Stark when he ran away from his feelings, and everybody else's, because he never managed to run far enough. Or he didn't want to. I loved him, because he was like a multilayered puzzle, complex and captivating and beautiful.

I thought a lot about it, more than people would have noticed. For someone as selfish and goal-oriented as me, Tony lived in my head rent-free most of the time. And nobody would find out if I had the choice because let's face it, I'm a short cameo in his life. I'm a fuckin' catch and even then, I can't expect to hold his attention forever. His genius is too brilliant to settle for one when he could easily have the whole damn world.

Another hour consisted of me pacing and accompanying the pizza delivery boys to the common floor. It was hilarious - they were obviously star-struck about walking the same carpet as their heroes. I could see the faint hope of meeting one of the Avengers in their eyes, their posture. All they got was me - in my sweatpants, Tony's tee and no bra. My tits got the attention they deserved, at least.

My lounging was interrupted by a golden circle noisily appearing in the middle of the room, followed by Clint abruptly falling through it with a pained moan. I froze, the pizza in my mouth turning to ash - Strange poked his head through the hole in space, finding my eyes. He looked exhausted.

"Help him, I don't have much time," He breathed and disappeared, closing the portal behind himself.

The pizza piece flew back in the box as I stumbled, jumped over the headrest, kneeling beside Clint in no time. "Bird, tell me what hurts," I demanded. Not that I had a clue what to do. I mean, I knew basic first aid and...

"My leg," He gritted out, curling in on himself. Fear flooded me, limbs turning to lead. Hawk had a good pain tolerance, I knew he could break an arm and not utter a single syllable until he thought it safe to showcase his vulnerability. "That squid motherfucker stung me, I don't know. My whole body is on fire," His speech was slurred.

I nodded, deciding to limit the touching to only the necessary actions. The leg of his pants was torn and the wound itself was shaped like a whip mark, thin and red and angry. It oozed a yellowish pus-like substance, it smelled bitter, almost like stale water and seaweed salad. I didn't know much about aliens but jellyfish stings, I could work with. A short Google check later, I had an approximate plan.

"Friday, run diagnostics." I ordered, taking a deep breath and filing away the fear, the panic and anxiety for later.

"Mr. Barton has a wound that appears to be contaminated with an unknown chemical that is causing an adverse reaction. The elevated body temperature suggests that his immune system is fighting it. I would suggest a blood test to examine the offending specimens."

A blood draw? I could do that. I definitely, absolutely, could do that.

"Bird, Clint, did you hear that?" I gently touched his shoulder only for him to recoil from my hand, muttering unintelligibly. "Pretty bird, I'm going to help you. Let me." My bedside manner needed improvement - with brain running a mile a minute, I babbled utter nonsense as Friday directed me to the needed supplies. Getting the blood was a feat on it's own - I had to physically sit on top of Clint to get but a tiny vial of the red liquid.

A few tears escaped the emotional fortress I had to build within myself. Clint was in so, so much pain - pain I was inadvertently making worse by touching him. I sprinted to Bruce's lab, feeding the sample to be analysed by Friday, tearing through the room in a hurricane. First aid kit, IV, saline, antibiotics. Restraints, too, just in case.

"Analysis complete. The contaminant appears to be acting similarly to a parasitic infection with a short life-span. Primarily feeds on copper, iron and various metals contained in the human body. Does not appear to reproduce or multiply, my algorithms cannot determine the cause of said behaviour. Calculating..." Friday's mechanical voice paused. "I have calculated the approximate duration of Mr. Barton's symptoms. Onset of critical stage in one to three hours. Complete extinction of parasitic organisms in approximately sixty hours."

"Fri, do you think I have a chance of saving Clint before he goes crazy from pain? And have you figured out what's causing it?" My brain was all over the place.

"I have the best faith in you, miss." The AI sounded almost... Comforting? "I am still running multiple diagnostics. My algorithms suggest the organisms may be attacking the nerve endings - reason unclear."

An idea struck me. A crazy, brash, absurd idea. The pathogen was alien and we didn't have antibiotics to kill it. Even if I gave Clint some sort of medicine, it could go awry really really quickly. Besides, wasn't there a medical team for this..?

"Friday, alert the medical suite."

"Request denied. Per Mr. Stark's protocols, only Sir himself and Dr. Banner are authorized to request medical assistance in case of alien pathogen contamination."

"Fuck. Fuck, that makes no fuckin' sense!" I yelled helplessly. "Okay, do you have blood matching Clint's type laying around?" I asked sarcastically. This protocol pissed me off. What was Tony scared of? That someone would steal alien germs? Too late for that, there were plenty of samples all over the sidewalks downtown.

"A-positive, blue refrigerator, top shelf." Friday's answer was curt.

My hands shook. My whole body shook. Clint was laying in fetal position right where I'd left him and the man wasn't looking better - he became paler, dark circles under his eyes, clammy sweat breaking on every exposed part of his skin. Moving him was out of the question - Clint violently recoiled from me once I tried to touch him.

Reluctantly, I dragged the dining room chairs and piled up whatever heavy things I could on top of them, praying to every god that they would hold a trained man trash around in pain. Then, came the restraints. Belts with clips unlike one could see in a movie with a psych ward. I fumbled with them, then with Clint - very slowly, but I got both of his arms fastened and the man rolled onto his back.

"Wwhat... S'appening..?" Hawk finally slurred, cracking his eyes to see my (probably) disheveled and panicked face.

"This is going to hurt, I won't lie. A lot," I rambled, setting up the tools needed for both a blood draw and a blood transfusion. "I'm not a doctor. I'm not a scientist. You have alien parasites in your blood. I'm going to get rid of em," I announced, not mentioning the fact that I had to Google all the things I was going to do to him.

"S'okay, I trust you," Clint slurred again, moving about much more weakly than before. The tips of his fingers began to turn blue and the blood vessels on his face stood out in a pink-purple web. Not good.

My finest thinking moment: laying out some tarp around the archer and putting on gloves and a mask to minimize the possibility of getting infected. I started with the wound first, carefully wiping away the yellowish goop and immediately sealing it into a biohazard container. Some alcohol around the edges, the wound began emanating a faint wisp of smoke as Clint yelled hoarsely. I didn't even react - man, aliens and their germs were fuckin' weird.

Another biohazard container traveled next to Clint's arm. I had a disposable scalpel in one hand and my courage in another - it was now or never. The vein I was cutting was a minor one, but with Clint's body in total disarray, it was an ugly fountain of pinkish-purple liquid that spurted from it. I was no doctor but blood shouldn't have looked like that.

I stared at the timer on my phone. Twenty seconds, thirty, fifty. Eighty seconds, the blood was beginning to have more of a red hue. Clint's breathing slowed, tremors subsiding by a smidgen. One hundred and eighty seconds, the stream was a healthy deep red colour. With a swift motion, I wrapped up the wound, folded his arm, tied off the blood flow higher up his arm with a spare restraint. Clint wasn't moving much anymore; my hand that periodically checked his pulse shook but dutifully did it's job. His heart was working steady.

Compared to having to drain a friend of his blood, setting up the IV with a transfusion was a walk in the park. My mind was empty of any thoughts but for the actions needed to complete the process.

The container with contaminated blood, closed, sealed and put in a plastic bag, along with the gloves and the tarp. My own exposed flesh, meticulously scrubbed with alcohol until the skin became red and raw. All the instruments, Clint's pants, my clothes - in the bag.

The archer himself was laying still, his breathing steady and calm, face no longer looking like he was one step away from the grave. After undoing the restraints, I wiped down every surface we touched with Tony's vodka - rubbing alcohol had run out and I was too emotionally drained to go downstairs and leave Clint for too long. Whenever the booze collided with a stray drop of blood, a wispy smoke emerged. Such an interesting reaction. Part of me couldn't wait to examine the phenomena together with Bruce. The other part was considering the possibility of having a panic attack in a seafood restaurant.

"Fri, keep an eye- a sensor on Clint for me, will ya? I need a shower and some pants," I denounced tiredly, padding to the communal shower. I found respite, however brief, under the steam for a few minutes. Then I found Tony's old tee and a pair of someone's sweats - I didn't care whose. Post-stress adrenaline shivers had me feeling stark naked in the middle of Alaska despite the room being a toasty, comfortable temperature according to the digital thermostat.

Now I just had to think about what to tell the team.

Propping Clint's head on a decorative pillow and covering him with a soft fleece blanket was the least I could have done for the long suffering archer. The floor was hard but I sat next to him, running a hand through his matted hair, my brain an incomprehensible mess.

✨ TAGLIST OF MY LOVELIES (OPEN) ✨

@another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit @littlegasps ​ @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway @softie-socks @schemefrenzy @letsby

#party favours #bun writes #tony stark x y/n #tony stark x reader #tony stark x you #bruce banner x you #bruce banner x reader #bruce banner x y/n #stephen strange x y/n #stephen strange x you #stephen strange x reader

[iatethepomegranate]

We are not alone in the dark with our demons, Chapter 12

In which Caleb buys a house in Rexxentrum with Beau and Yasha, becomes a professor, learns how to be a person, and grapples with how to help the other Volstrucker survivors, and his students, in a way he had never been helped.

Content warnings: References to Caleb's backstory, depression, poverty

Chapter summary: Caleb and the Nein meet up in Nicodranas, and he can no longer delay telling them of his failure to protect someone who desperately needed him. But, as it turns out, he was not the only person keeping secrets about that day.

Chapter notes: This is a somewhat chaotic chapter. Enjoy and let chaos reign, I guess! Chapter title is from Three by Sleeping At Last

****

Chapter 12: A mess of a story I'm ashamed to tell but I'm slowly learning how to break this spell

Essek teleported the four of them to the Blooming Grove the following morning to pick up Caduceus, who offered to message Wensforth to save the wizards the spell. They had breakfast in the Grove with the Clays, and got their hands dirty in the garden for a while, until Caleb rolled the aches from his shoulders and began to draw the teleportation circle to Tidepeak Tower.

“I might have to go back earlier than the rest of you,” said Beauregard. “Dairon’s guiding the monks on the Nico hunt for now, but they’re super busy.”

“We can send you back whenever you need,” said Essek.

Caleb’s next few chalk strokes were a bit more aggressive than they needed to be. It was hard not to feel guilty for leaving Rexxentrum while Nico was out on his own and people were searching for him. Essek sat on the floor by his side, knocking their knees together. He felt better, and no one made any mention of his silent outburst.

He completed the final stroke and the five of them rushed through, landing in a familiar tower, where Wensforth waited in the doorway.

“Welcome, welcome.” Wensforth guided them down the stairs. “The master is eager to speak with you.”

Yussa was already arranged on a couch in the sitting area on the ground floor, delicate fingers holding a teacup. Once borderline inscrutable, the man smiled at them as he often did these days. Especially to Caleb, on whom Jester thought Yussa had a crush. Caleb was more of the mind that Yussa saw him as little more than a precocious child, given their respective ages, but his particular fondness was evident all the same.

“Oremid tells me you are teaching at the Soltryce Academy now,” Yussa said. “Sit. We should talk.”

“Hi, Yussa,” Beauregard said, a little pointedly. “How’ve you been?”

“I am well, Beauregard. It is good to see you. All of you.”

They arranged themselves on the soft couches in the space, Caleb sitting across Yussa for ease of conversation, given the man clearly had things to say today. Essek was at Caleb’s side, slightly further than he would be just around the Nein, but close enough to be a comfort whenever Caleb’s anxiety spiked nonetheless.

Essek had been to Yussa’s tower a few times in Caleb’s company before. Given everything the Nein had put Yussa through already, the man had taken the presence of a fugitive of the Kryn Dynasty in his stride.

With a gesture from Yussa, his teapot lifted and poured itself into the other five cups on the little table in the centre of the room. Then, in turn, each cup floated into the hands of his visitors. Caleb accepted his with a soft thanks, slipping into Zemnian out of habit. He had spoken more Zemnian in the last few weeks than he had in years. It was always the little words, the pleases and thank yous, the hellos and goodbyes, that stuck the hardest.

“So…” Yussa honed in on him again. “Teaching. A step down from the original job they offered you, I hear.”

“Teaching is a better use of my time than spying.” There were more things Caleb could say about the Archmage of Civil Influence as a position, and most of them were far less polite. “Astrid always wanted that position more than I did anyway.”

“Good. You might survive to old age after all, for a human.”

Essek flinched a little at the reminder of Caleb’s shorter lifespan. Yussa’s eyes tracked the movement, but he let it pass without comment.

“Are we third-wheeling for you guys again?” Beau asked, but it wasn’t really a question. “Because we can, like, go.”

Caduceus placed a package on Yussa’s table. “Here, I brought that tea you liked last time.”

“Yes, thank you. You are all welcome to stay if you like.”

Beauregard was already standing up. “Nah, I think we’re good. Cool to see you again with your face where it belongs.” She awkwardly finger-gunned in Yussa’s direction, backing towards the door.

She, Yasha and Caduceus left the tower.

Yussa watched them go with amusement. “It seems my social graces are rather rusty.”

“They don’t mind,” said Caleb. “They have met too many wizards to be offended.” Essek snickered into his hand, finally relaxing a bit. “So, you were saying?”

“Teaching is good work, if you can tolerate the children,” said Yussa. “I did it myself for a time. For one to turn down an archmage position… you must have a goal.”

“Leave the Empire better than I found it,” Caleb said. That encompassed all his knotted up feelings about it.

Yussa raised a single well-kept eyebrow. “Interesting. What is your definition of ‘better’, if I may ask?”

Caleb did have a vision for this, and the situation with Felix and Nico had thrown into sharp, painful relief how far there was to go, and how much pain he would never be able to prevent. “No more children thrown on the pyre. No more stolen childhoods. No more abuse. A government and its mages who choose to consider simple human cost, before they consider their own selfish ambitions.” Caleb was typically more reserved with Yussa, but the more he spoke of this, the harder it became to restrain his emotions. “No more wizards with a god complex who think themselves above basic compassion and ethics. No more butchering the innocent to grease the wheels of war. Just… no more.”

“A lofty goal,” Yussa said, quiet. “One that would take the remainder of my lifetime, or even young Essek’s lifetime, let alone yours.”

“I know. Hence the importance of teaching these things to those who will come after me.”

Yussa hummed thoughtfully. “I wish you luck. More powerful men than yourself have tried, and been consumed.”

“Been there, done that. Have the trauma.” Caleb wasn’t sure where he found the capacity to joke, even flatly, about all of this. Sometimes it was easier to get the point across if he allowed for a bit of sarcasm. “In my experience, the children put at the mercy of these people may need the most help. And that is something I can do.”

“I will watch your progress.” Yussa finished his tea, setting the cup aside. “Now, enough of mundane matters. I have been tinkering with Willi some more. Would you like to see the results?”

“Always.” Caleb missed that golem terribly.

They lost a few hours discussing the golems of the Happy Fun Ball, and comparing notes about the pre-Calamity Aeormatons the Nein had encountered. Caleb and Essek had run across Devexian a few times in their travels since. It was a good use of time, and it settled Caleb’s nerves. He felt better.

***

Once they left Tidepeak Tower, Essek disguised as a blonde half-elf, they headed over to Veth’s place. Caleb was somewhat nervous about this, because he knew she would see through any of his bullshit and know he was going through something. And then he would have to explain everything to the rest of the Nein. And, of course, Jester already had an inkling thanks to Astrid.

There was no getting out of this. And it wasn’t that Caleb didn’t want them to know, exactly. He had just grown tired of explaining it. And he knew what little equilibrium he had managed to find would fall away as soon as Veth said or did anything in response, and he would break all over again.

Nevertheless, he messaged Veth as soon as they stepped out of the tower. “Hallo, Veth. Essek and I are on our way to your place. Be there soon.” Then, for old time’s sake: “You can reply to this message.”

The first sound that came through was Veth’s trademark screech. “Caleb! We made lunch. Get over here!” A split-second’s pause. “Good shot! Oh, sorry Lebby. Luc shot Beau in the ass. Like mother, like son.”

Luc was going to be a menace as a teenager. Caleb intended to be around to see it. And probably try to save a little bit of Yeza’s sanity if possible.

Caleb and Essek took their time wandering through Nicodranas. The streets were filled with people out for lunch, enticing scents curling through the air. Caleb and Essek stopped by a bakery to grab some pastries for the group (mostly Jester)--there had evidently been some Zemnian influence on Nicodranas, or the other way around, as treats such as bee stings could be found in both areas. Nicodranas made them a touch sweeter and stickier.

Caleb also grabbed a fresh loaf of bread, though he did not shove his hands into it this time. He hadn’t known that was a poverty thing until Beau and Jester had reacted so strongly to him doing it that one time. He still thought it was a useful trick, but it apparently unnerved people. Bread mittens had kept him warm many times in the freezing cold when he had no one to look out for him, and had to choose between food and something as simple as mittens.

Anyway, bread was wonderful.

They wound through the streets until they reached Veth’s place. There was an unpleasant feeling in the pit of Caleb’s stomach that he couldn’t quite describe. Unease or dread felt too uncharitable, but the feeling was somewhere in that neighbourhood. Essek slipped his hand into Caleb’s, gently leading him to the door. Essek knocked, and it was thrown open in seconds and Veth had already thrown herself at Caleb’s abdomen, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist.

Caleb almost broke then and there. He carefully rested a hand on the top of her head, sliding his fingers through her hair, looking ahead but not really seeing anything. Veth gave him a final squeeze and stepped back, grabbing his hand on the way. It took Caleb a second too long to lock eyes with her, by which time whatever joy had been on her face had been replaced with worry.

“Hi, Lebby,” she said, in a careful soft tone she used whenever he was teetering on the brink of crashing down. “What’s the matter?”

Caleb took a careful breath, and spoke in a measured tone. “I will tell you, but we should eat first. I may not be able to later.”

Veth tugged him inside, Essek taking care of the door and following them through the house. The rest of the Nein were already crammed into the kitchen, stuffing their faces with a simple stew that smelled delightful. It must have been one of the recipes Veth remembered from Felderwin.

Jester leapt upon him with a hug, dragging Essek in with her. “You’re here! It’s so good to see you! We got chased by a dragon turtle again and I turned it into a sea slug like last time, and we got away!”

“This happened at sea, I assume?” asked Caleb, who knew enough about Jester to take nothing at face value.

“Of course, Caleb. Don’t be silly!” Jester let him go, and booped his nose. He managed not to flinch.

Caleb wordlessly held out the pastries and bread. Jester squealed and grabbed them off him, shoving them into the centre of the table. Veth grabbed an enormous knife and began to cut the bread while the rest of the Nein shuffled around to make room for two more chairs. It was a tight fit, and Caleb was firmly sandwiched between Essek and Beauregard, but it felt somewhat akin to Essek’s nighttime pressure on his back and sometimes chest that crushed his soul back into his body. Their thighs were jammed together now, and it was easy to hook his ankle around Essek’s and keep himself grounded. For now.

A bowl was shoved in his direction and he ate mechanically, dimly aware of the chatter around him. Luc’s voice was among the loudest, and it was good to hear his voice. After everything the boy had been through, on Caleb’s account no less. No matter what anyone else said.

Caleb was going to spiral if he didn’t get a hold of himself. And he wanted to have a good time in Nicodranas; he didn’t know when he would be back here. Not to mention he would prefer not to retraumatise the already traumatised toddler by having a breakdown in the middle of lunch.

So he ate. Slowly. Methodically. He silently counted each mouthful, because he needed to count something. And when he had finished the stew, he felt more present in his surroundings. Veth distributed slices of bread with little pots of spiced olive oil and balsamic vinegar, and the Nein continued to chatter away as they tore off pieces of bread, dunked them into the oil, and finished off the loaf. Caleb was glad they liked it. And that Veth had been here long enough to have picked up a local bread tradition to share with them all.

“This is good bread, Caleb,” said Jester.

“I went to the bakery you recommended,” Caleb replied.

“That was months ago! You remembered!”

Caleb tapped his temple.

“Caleb has a very good memory,” Veth said warmly, as if everyone at the table wasn’t already keenly aware.

“I’m a bit curious about that,” said Kingsley, his tail smacking Beauregard in the arm, ignoring her as she slapped it off her. “Have you always been like that?”

“My memory was always good, ja,” said Caleb. It was rare for Kingsley to ask about someone’s past; very Molly-esque, not that Caleb would ever tell him that. “I could count things very well, especially time, and naturally had good recall. I did develop it further at school, but it was always there.”

Most people who found out about Caleb’s memory either saw it as an interesting party trick, or a useful tool if they were more like Trent. He did not speak of the downsides of having a near-infallible memory very often.

But Kingsley was looking at him with sharpness in his eyes behind the easy smile. “Maybe I’m biased since I barely remember anything that this body did before a few months ago, but that sounds feckin’ awful.” He said it lightly, but Caleb could hear the edge in his voice. Kingsley had been around when Caleb had told his story to Beauregard in the Grove; he had the context, and his own experiences, to put things together.

“A blessing and a curse, ja.”

The mood at the table threatened to darken, but Luc was thankfully oblivious to it, and instead started babbling about a huge bug the Brenattos had found in the garden yesterday. And that his father had screamed very loudly. Caleb sat back from the conversation, but was pleased when the tension broke.

“It really was adorable,” Veth was saying.

Yeza rolled his eyes good-naturedly. “Yes, and you were my valiant saviour once again.”

But lunch was just about wrapping up at this point, and Veth would soon turn her focus back onto Caleb and his problems. Caleb’s lunch sat like a stone in his stomach, and maybe he shouldn’t have eaten quite that much. But it was hard to say no to a home-cooked meal surrounded by the people he loved most in this world. Those who were still alive, anyway.

Veth, charitably, let Caleb have a few extra minutes while she and Yeza cleared the table before she sat back down with a sigh, and turned her eyes to him. “All right. What’s the matter?”

Yeza picked Luc up. “I think we’ll go for a walk.” He didn’t know every little thing about Caleb’s shit, but he knew enough to understand whatever they were about to discuss was not something Luc needed to hear. “We’ll be back in an hour.”

As soon as they were gone, Jester spoke up. “Astrid said some stuff happened, but she wouldn’t tell me what.”

Caleb sighed deeply. “All right. I will tell you. Some of you already know what happened. I would appreciate your assistance.”

Beauregard knocked her knee against his. “We’ll help. But you should start.”

So he did. Caleb told the Nein that Astrid had been reaching out to the Volstrucker, and that two boys had been unaccounted for. He led most of the explanation of how they had come to understand what this probably meant, and to make plans for it. Beauregard began to speak up a bit when he spoke of finding Felix and convincing him to speak to them, of bringing in Caduceus to lift the modified memory. Caduceus began to add pieces where relevant, of the things he saw. Of scrying on Nico, and learning where he was.

Beauregard led the discussion of rushing after him and finding the house ablaze, and Caleb very briefly spoke of his experience on the upper floor, and finding the bodies of Nico’s parents. The memories were too vivid, and choked him up a bit, so Beauregard took over once again, and then Caduceus after they had traded places to help Caleb try to save the Baumanns.

“I do have a confession to make,” said Caduceus.

“Oh?” said Caleb, who couldn’t say much else at the moment.

“I was still scrying when Nico lit the fire,” Caduceus admitted. “I saw how he reacted to it. I chose not to inform you, because I feared leaving the scry before your arrival, in case something else happened. I… in the moment, I did not think telling you would have helped, but I wanted to apologise. I wanted to explain all this earlier, but...” Caduceus didn’t finish--maybe he had realised that would be jumping a bit ahead in the story. But Caleb understood.

There had been a small shred of curiosity in the back of Caleb’s mind, but he had been too preoccupied to give it much thought. But Caduceus’s explanation made sense; he had weighed up the benefits of both options and chosen the one he thought best in the moment. Leaving the scry to tell Caleb the house was already ablaze probably wouldn’t have made much difference. The Baumanns had already been long dead by the time he reached them. So Caleb harboured no ill will towards Caduceus for the difficult choice he had made, nor did he resent Caduceus for not telling him sooner, when Caleb had been far too unwell.

“There is no need to apologise,” Caleb told him. “You made a hard decision. Thank you for telling me now, when I am better able to handle it. Are you all right?”

Caduceus smiled sadly at him. “I understand you better now. Not in the way either of us wanted, but I’m all right now that I’ve told you.” He straightened, clearing his throat. “Anyway, where were we?”

They briefly talked about the night they had Nico, and that it had been a bad one for Caleb, and then Essek chipped in to describe the Greater Restoration spell the following morning. And the chaos that had ensued. Caleb spoke briefly about the chase on his side of things, with Beau and Yasha contributing theirs.

“We didn’t find him,” said Beauregard. “Monks and Volstrucker are still on the lookout. Caleb thinks the kid probably ran for the woods to get some cover. He taught Felix the Sending spell and took him back home to his parents.”

“Felix and I message Nico regularly,” said Caleb. “No responses yet.” And, because he was with the Nein, and because they loved him, he said, “I… feel a bit useless, at the moment.”

Jester reached across the table, tears in her eyes, and squeezed his hand. “You’re not useless, Caleb. You’re really smart, and really cool.”

“You’ve done a lot for those kids,” said Fjord. “I’m sure they both appreciate it, even if Nico isn’t talking to you. He’ll find you when he’s ready.”

“Maybe,” Caleb murmured. He was tired.

Veth was watching him, mouth downturned at the corners. “Caleb. Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve come over.”

Caleb didn’t know what to say to her. An apology wasn’t enough. And he didn’t know if he could explain it right now. He looked away from her, down at the table, and tried not to crack apart with guilt. He was not doing a very good job.

A flash of movement, and Veth had launched herself across the table and into his lap. “Oh, Cay Cay, honey. No. Shh.” She squished his cheeks, which he only now realised were wet. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.” She flung her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. Caleb buried his face in her shoulder. “I’m so sorry. I’m not angry, and I don’t blame you for not wanting to talk about it. It’s okay.”

That only made him feel worse. Breathing was hard. Two hands, belonging to two different people, found their way to his back, rubbing slow circles. The more delicate hand--Essek’s--applied a little more pressure than the other. Probably Beauregard. She was next to him.

“You’re all right, Caleb,” said Caduceus. “We’ve got you.”

Caleb laughed wetly, remembering those exact words from Fjord as they had guided him home after a panic attack behind the coffee shop. Maybe this was a thing now. Or at least a thing from the Wildmother devotees of the Nein.

The rest of the day was quiet. Caleb composed himself after a while, and set up his lesson plans and speech notes on the floor of the Brenattos’ living room. A cup of dead people tea at his side. Surrounded by the chatter of his friends, and Essek’s head on his shoulder as he worked through a book written in Undercommon.

Yeza and Luc returned after a while, and Luc napped on the couch at Caleb’s back. Breathing loudly into his ear. It should have been annoying, but really wasn’t. The boy woke up some time later and wriggled his way onto the floor, peppering Caleb with questions about what he was doing. Caleb was more than happy to answer, hoping he had simplified it enough for the boy. Luc was very clever, but he was also very young.

Most of the Nein drifted away once Caleb seemed more stable. Jester, Fjord and Kingsley went off to check on their crew (including Vandran), and hang out with Marion. Caleb expected he would see her at the Chateau in the evening for dinner. Beau and Yasha had wandered off to the fish market.

Caduceus was still around, and Caleb suspected he actually felt much worse than he was letting on. But he seemed content to chat with Yeza and Veth over tea in the kitchen. Caleb caught snatches of the conversation; it seemed they were trying to explain some alchemical concepts to him. There was a good chance that Caduceus did have some knowledge in the area, but not in the same scientific way. Which made such a conversation all the more entertaining, as fragments of it drifted into the living room as the Brenattos and Caduceus tried to reconcile their wildly different experiences of very similar things.

Luc had just finished asking Caleb what a cantrip was, drawn from his lesson notes for Beginner’s Transmutation. The boy climbed into his lap, resting his head against Caleb’s collarbone. At first, Caleb thought he was still groggy from his nap. Then:

“Uncle Caleb?”

“Ja?”

“Are you having a bad day?”

That was a far cry from most of Caleb’s interactions with Luc, where he was mostly playing the part of the fun uncle with cool magic tricks. Essek hadn’t spent as much time with Luc, and was still phenomenally awkward around both him and Yeza, and even he seemed to notice the shift. Essek froze, his eyes glued to the one spot on the page.

“What do you mean?” Caleb asked Luc.

Luc shrugged. “Your eyes are puffy.”

Caleb chuckled at that; trust a small child to have no filter. “Ja, okay. I cried a bit earlier. Your mother and our friends took good care of me, though.” He thought back to Luc’s question. “We all have bad days, ja?”

Luc nodded, face pressed against Caleb’s shirt. “I had a bad day yesterday.”

“Oh?”

“I was remembering something that hurt a lot. And sometimes when I remember it, I get really sad and can’t think about anything else.”

Caleb, unfortunately, knew exactly what Luc was remembering. Veth didn’t bring it up often, but she had occasionally mentioned that Luc would have entire days after waking from nightmares of fire where he was just… out of sorts. Not wanting to play. Or even shoot his crossbow. Caleb could relate to the feeling.

So he set his pen aside and wrapped his arms around Luc. “Ja, that happens to me, too. Shall we stick together for today? We can cheer each other up.”

Luc just nodded, and Caleb rocked him side-to-side. The boy was probably still recovering, both from his disturbed sleep and the depressive episode.

“You’re good with him,” Essek said later, when Luc had fallen asleep against his chest.

Yeza ducked his head out of the kitchen, probably concerned that Luc was up to mischief in his silence, but his expression cleared when he saw the boy was sleeping. “Thank you, Caleb.”

Luc was not only a child, but also a halfling child, so it was a simple matter for even Caleb to hold him throughout the day. He felt better having someone else to care for, and Luc seemed to find comfort in Caleb’s attention.

***

That evening, they all visited the Lavish Chateau for dinner. Essek was in his blonde half-elf disguise again while the group ate on the ground floor. Luc was still clingy with Caleb, but he genuinely didn’t mind. He balanced the boy in his lap while they ate dinner. The chef had prepared a mildly spiced rice dish for the table that was easy for both of them to eat in this situation.

Marion joined them, graceful and lovely as ever. Like Yeza, she had not held ill will for what had befallen her during Trent’s pursuit. In fact, on more than one occasion, she had joked that she should thank “that horrible man” for forcing her to spend time with Babenon while in hiding. The situation was still complicated between the pair, and Caleb understood those kinds of complications better than most of the Nein. But she seemed happier than she had been in a long time.

Jester had apparently updated Marion with every shred of information she had gleaned from the Nein, so Marion was already aware of Caleb’s new job, and that he and the lesbians had a house together in Rexxentrum.

“It’s quite the change, I imagine,” she said.

“Oh, ja. I still wake up sometimes and have to pinch myself.”

“If you ever find yourself in Rexxentrum,” said Beauregard, “we’d love to have you.” She even managed not to look constipated or aggressive while saying it, which was a far cry from the prickly woman Caleb had met in Trostenwald all that time ago.

Marion smiled warmly. “Unlikely, but I will be sure to take you up on the offer if the need arises. How is your work, Beauregard?”

She glanced at Caleb, and sighed. “Complicated. But Caleb’s ex is the new archmage in the Assembly, and she’s actually not a shitty person most of the time. So that helps.”

Marion looked to Caleb, amused. “How does she feel about your new partner?”

Gods, Caleb had never gotten to have this kind of conversation with his own mother. So, even though the reminder hurt a bit, he indulged her. “Oh. Uh. Well, you see…”

“Caleb’s had a threesome,” Jester supplied helpfully.

“I see.” Now Marion looked very entertained. “We all have hidden depths. The two people who came to warn us about your teacher?”

“Ja.” Caleb’s face was hot, and probably as red as his hair. “They are… respectful of us. But they also told me they would, ah…” He remembered there was a small child on his lap who absolutely did not need to go around telling people he would cut off their balls. “They would cut off an important part of his anatomy if he ever hurt me. So, I think they approve.”

Essek made a choked sound. “You did not tell me this.”

“I was preoccupied.” Caleb didn’t need to elaborate; Essek would figure out what he meant.

Essek relaxed marginally, and knocked their knees together. “Right.” He wasn’t the type for public displays of affection, even if he didn’t have to worry about drawing attention to himself.

Marion looked to Essek. “Good luck.”

He laughed nervously. “Thank you. I will need it.”

“You’ll be fine,” Caleb said. Astrid and Wulf cared too much for Caleb to hurt him, now that they were no longer in a situation where it was required of them.

“Moral of the story,” Beauregard said, already three cups in. “Caleb’s got game.”

“I really do not,” Caleb said flatly.

“Real recognises real, Caleb, and you’re lookin’ real familiar.”

Caleb sighed, relieved that Luc was preoccupied with a puzzle cube he had brought the Brenattos last time he was in town. “We have talked about this before.”

“Yeah, but it’s different in front of Marion. She knows what I’m talking about.”

Marion chuckled softly behind her hand. “Indeed I do.”

“Caleb’s a loving guy, if you know what I mean,” said Jester, and her eyebrow waggle was too much for him to bear. Caleb did not stop loving people, and while it was easier to deal with his feelings for Jester now they were both in stable, happy relationships, there would always be an edge for Caleb. A point where he had to step back.

Kingsley, also quite drunk at this point, was biting his lip while he watched Caleb. “Oh, really?” The flirting from Kingsley was far easier to handle, even if the ghost of Molly made any joy bittersweet.

“That’s quite enough, I think,” said Essek. Gods, Caleb was both relieved and terrified by how well the man could read him these days.

Kingsley and Jester both pouted, and Caleb pounded back his glass of wine so he didn’t have to look at them.

Later, as Caleb carried Luc through the nighttime streets alongside Essek, Veth and Yeza, Essek tugged gently on his sleeve.

“Maybe this is a bad time,” Essek said quietly, tilting his head to check that Luc was asleep. He was. “And I do not expect answers you do not wish to give. But, may I ask you something?”

Caleb glanced ahead, where Veth had grabbed Yeza’s ass; they weren’t listening to this conversation. “All right.”

“I know the nature of our circumstances means we cannot be together all the time,” Essek said quietly. “I had a… proposal, I suppose. I don’t know how to word it, or if you will be insulted. But I notice you are very…” He cleared his throat. “What the fuck am I saying? You are a sexual person, and I enjoy that very much about you. And while we are together, I am happy for us both to fulfill our needs with each other.”

“But?” Caleb had not fully recovered from Jester and Kingsley at the Chateau.

“Well, I was wondering. You know I do not experience attraction as often as you do. That I need to be close to someone, and I am close to very few people. You are the first in many years to have caught my interest in this way. But I know it’s not the same for you.”

“Essek, I love you, but please get to the point.”

“Right.” Essek chuckled, and it was out of sheer discomfort. “I just wanted to say, that if you choose to scratch that, ah, itch while I am not around, I would be okay with that.”

Caleb didn’t know what he had expected from Essek, but certainly not that. “Oh. Um. Good to know.”

Essek glanced around in the dark, evidently found nothing of concern, and kissed Caleb’s cheek. “You are still my priority in that department. And I want to remain yours as well.”

“You are.”

“Good. There will be times when we are apart for a long time. You are still mine, through all of it, but I don’t mind if you, ah, take your pleasures as you need them.”

“That is… generous.” Caleb’s mind was not coping with this conversation at all. “I will… think about it.”

The Brenatto home came into view at that point, and Caleb was relieved that it effectively ended this discussion. Caleb had never really talked about it, but he had also never hidden from Essek the fact he had a lot of feelings for many people going at any one time. Essek came first. Always. And he wasn’t sure if he would ever take Essek up on the offer to invite someone else into his bed in Essek’s absence. But it was good of him to say.

He felt seen, in a strange way. Even though Essek was firmly monogamous, and extremely demisexual, he understood Caleb better than most.

So, as long as Essek wasn’t being self-sacrificing by offering this, Caleb was grateful for it. Even if he never acted on it. He couldn’t think about it right now. Probably wouldn’t for a long time. And if he did think about it, he certainly would not be doing that while Essek was very much within his reach, rendering the offer irrelevant.

They stepped inside the house after Veth and Yeza, and offered to watch Luc for a while. Though no one said anything explicitly for fear of Luc waking and hearing the conversation, it had evidently been some time since Veth and Yeza had been intimate together.

So Caleb and Essek sat in the sitting room for a while, quietly working on their respective studies, with Luc napping in Caleb’s arms.

#caleb widogast #essek thelyss #shadowgast #critical role #cr2 #fanfiction #my fics #the pomegranate's professor widogast fic

[rainbowcaleb]

throw me a lifeline

(warning: angst, those eye tattoos, and major spoilers for episode 122) (edit: also available on ao3 for easier reading!)

There’s an itch in his head he can’t shake out, a voice in his mind like an echo, and something new, terrible and new, resting on his shoulder.

Caleb was awake. (He pinched the skin around the intrusion on his shoulder. The tattoo was flat, eerily smooth like undamaged skin. The pinch was sharp, grounding. Yes, he was awake.) He looked at Beau, they looked at each other, both of their own gazes flitting to the red eyes and back. They had pried too far into the unknown, delved in the ocean without asking the right questions, and now the weight of water was crashing back in.

Fjord was scrambling forward from where he was keeping watch, his brow furrowed, questions about to spring from his lips.

Caleb held up a hand. “Wait, can you-” he gestured towards the sword and then around in the air.

Fjord shook his head, his shoulders slumped. “Not now,” he murmured. “Not yet.”

“You think we’re-” Beau pointed at her eyes, her real ones, not the red one.

Caleb nodded. “Lucien’s trust does not extend very far, it is safe to assume we are being observed.” Caleb tried to keep his sight line steady, not letting his eyes look down towards the new watchful symbol on Beau’s hand.

Fjord was shaking the others awake, pressing his fingers to his lips, hushed whispers and conversations growing like wind around them, but Beau and Caleb continued looking at one another.

With a twist of emotion in her face, Beau broke the quiet. “What can we do?”

“I don’t know.”

“What does it mean?!”

“I don’t know.” Caleb wished he had another answer.

Then there was a hand on his shoulder, on the other one, the unmarked one. “We can’t stay here!” Jester looked between her friends, anguish on her face. “What if it keeps happening? What if it gets worse?”

“Let’s kill him.” Veth was already digging through her bag for who-knows-what. “Maybe he’s the source, maybe if we get rid of him, it’ll-” her voice broke. “I don’t want you to-”

Yasha was quieter than her usual, but everyone in the room could feel the rage rolling from the tight set of her jaw and the grip on her sword.

“Wait-” Fjord looked around the room, uselessly squinting in the corners, at the ceiling, finding no peace of mind hidden there. “How can we leave? He’ll know the second the tower disappears and the cold hits him.”

“He may already know.” Caduceus said, letting the truth strike the room like ice.

“We have...our friend.” Jester looked around at them all.

Beau looked confused. “Uh, the one outside? What can he do-”

“No, no, no.” Jester went up on her tiptoes. “The floating one? He wants to help, he asked us how he can help.”

“I don’t trust him.” Beau grimaced. “But...”

“But.” Caleb met her gaze. “Beauregard, I...I don’t know what this means. I am unsure if it's in my power to…it came from the dream, Beau. Manifested from the dream.”

“If we weren’t all so exhausted…” This was a wobble in Jester’s voice. “I’m a cleric, I can heal, I can heal! And I could try, or Caduceus, but it's the middle of the night, and I just can’t. I can’t.”

“Oh, Jester-” Yasha’s rage had simmered down into the background for now, and she let go of her sword to place a hand on Jester’s arm. Yasha reached her other hand out to hold Beau’s.

“Making plans or involving other people can wait until we’re not-” Fjord glanced upwards again, nerves tensing his body like a coiled spring. He lowered his voice again. “We can’t plan anything if we stay here. Caleb, can you take us away somewhere?”

Caleb was looking down at his arms, a map of scars he knew intimately, intrusions healed but never gone, but at least he knew how and why. This tattoo, this eye, this-

“-did you hear me?”

Caleb’s head lifted. Fjord was leaning towards him, repeating his question. Caleb tried to focus. “Depends on the somewhere. There is risky, and then there is dangerous.”

“We have to go to him.” Jester’s voice was pleading, but steady. Trying to get her friends to see reason. “We need to go somewhere safer, we need help, we need his magic. And he’s smart!” Jester tacked it on almost as an afterthought, a small smile on her face. “He’s really smart. He reads all those books, Caleb you know this, you said he was super intelligent and really handsome.”

Caleb knew what she was doing and he let his face form some mimic of a smile. “We do not know where he is, all we have is a mere scrap of a description...teleporting is flirting with death. I do not think I can take us to him.”

“We may need to hurry.” Caduceus was looking out towards the center of the tower, his eyes focused on the bronze aperture in the ceiling.

“We need to leave.” Veth’s voice was sharp. “We just need to get out.”

“He can meet us halfway, I’ll call him.” Jester stood up, determination bright on her face.

“Wait, what-” Fjord said.

“If Lucien is listening right now-” Beau started.

Jester waved her fingers in the air. “Hi, mama! Checking in to say our snowy trip isn’t going as planned. We got kinda lost...and hurt, but coming home to you soon!”

Beau smiled, a real one. “Jester you mad genius.”

Jester curtsied. “Our friend will at least know something is happening.”

“Caleb-” Caduceus turned to him sharply, his usual soft demeanor gone.

He got on his knees and rushed to get the right components from his bag. “Gather close!” He didn’t glance up to see if his friends had followed orders, he kept sketching the familiar runes on the ground. “I have been gathering stones while we walked, as a precaution. I will take us backwards on our journey, far enough that they cannot quickly find us again, but not too far. It will be cold. Get ready.”

Jester’s hand was back on his shoulder. Veth’s on the other. A circle of friends holding hands around him. Caleb’s chalk snapped in his grip as he rushed through the last rune. Then whoosh.

It felt thrice as cold compared to the tower’s warmth a second ago. Everyone stepped closer together, huddling against the sudden wind.

“We’re probably still being watched.” Beau looked around, squinting against the bluster of snow, but they had been dropped in pitch black.

“Perhaps.” Caleb tugged his scarf closer around himself. “But I have bought us time.”

“Jester, has he replied?” Fjord asked.

She frowned. “No, not yet at least, maybe he’s sleeping? Should I try again?”

“Can you?”

She bit her lip. “I’m running low on spells, especially since we haven’t rested in so long.”

“You said you took us backwards,” Beau turned to Caleb. “If we tried walking to Aeor, would we be retracing our steps right back to the Tomb Takers?”

Caleb nodded, then dragged a rough hand over his face. Reckless, stupidly reckless and ambitious. It was obvious, he should have known. He knew what knowledge meant. He had seen Vess. He had seen Lucien. He had seen the trail of dead bodies. He should have known.  

“Yes.” He spat out bitterly. “We’d return right to them.”

Fjord peered out against the darkness. “Somewhere east...our friend said he’s somewhere east of here.”

“Great load of good that does,” Veth grumbled. “If he’s stuck where he is, and we’re stuck where we are, how the hell are we supposed to get help?”

Jester shot up, practically dancing on her tiptoes. “Oh!” Her expression sped through reactions, relief and confusion and happiness. “He heard me, he’s awake now, he’s…”

“What did he say?” Caleb wanted to cling to her, the hope of her message a lifeline against this chaos.

“He’s not ‘supposed‘ to leave.” Jester frowned. “He sounded really frustrated, I think there’s some story there that we don’t know and the word limit, well, he didn’t say anything more about that. But he said he will find a way to us. He needs more information. Caleb, how? What can I tell him?”

His friends looked towards him for a response, but it just felt like more eyes. More eyes. Caleb didn’t have the answer, his mind was racing, they were in the middle of snowy nowhere with no landmarks. Even the sharpest magician couldn’t find a single pebble in the ocean like this.

“Unless…”

“Unless what?” Beau asked.

Caleb hadn’t noticed he had spoken the thought aloud. It felt suddenly like the breaking of a promise, even though no such words had been exchanged between them. It was a small moment, so delicate. He had handed this to Caleb at the end of one study session, telling Caleb he had done so well, that he was learning so fast. Essek had smiled. Caleb remembered that clearly, that smile, that brush of hands as he dropped it into Caleb’s palm.

“He gave me something, a gift.” Caleb could sense a raised eyebrow and an incoming question but he rushed past that. “If you message him and remind him, he could use it as a focus to find me. To find us.”

“What is it?” Jester asked. “In case he doesn’t remember?”

“It is just a bit of obsidian.” He shrugged. “A spell component.”

There was a weight to his words that made Jester give him a long look, but Caleb didn’t explain further.

Jester ran her fingers through the air again. “Us again, mama! Very snowy outside tonight, remember that obsidian you gave Caleb? When you see us again, maybe he can give it back?” She paused, then smiled. Essek’s response was much faster that time. “He is coming. He told us to try and find a way to stay warm, it may take him some time.”

 “‘Some time’?” Beau frowned. “Bastard.”

“He did say he was going to ‘sneak out’, whatever that means.” Jester grinned. “Ooh, I can’t wait to see him, that sounds like some juicy story.”

“Can we dome it up?” Fjord looked to Caleb, but his face fell when he saw Caleb’s dark expression. “Okay guys, looks like we need to huddle.”

“Let’s move some snow,” Caduceus started sweeping at the ground with his staff. “We can at least make a little dry spot.”

It was painful work. Not because it was hard, but because in the silence of gloved hands pushing against the ice and dirt, it was too easy to get trapped in thought. Whispers from the echo of his dream still ran wildly through Caleb’s mind, unsettling him in their reminder of what now sat on his shoulder. It was part of him now, whatever it was. Embedded, ingrained, intertwined. It had not asked; it just became.

Ten minutes passed, then twenty. They risked a small fire from Caleb’s hands, pressing shoulder to shoulder to block the light and keep the heat. Another ten minutes, and Veth had begun complaining about a lack of common decency from Essek, with Beau joining in as well.

“-a lack of punctuality, put that in the column of things you can’t trust about him.” She was saying. Then she stopped. Beau looked out towards the dark. “I swear to Ioun if that’s a wolf, or yeti, or anything other than Essek, I will-”

She didn’t finish her thought. There was a voice calling on the wind.

“It’s Essek.” Caduceus smiled. “That’s him.”

It was hard to see the cloaked figure against the night sky. He carried no light and his dark cloak melded in with his surroundings. He made nearly no sound, his feet never touching the ground. It was Essek.

Jester was the first to stand up, walking towards him, then running. They didn’t know anything for sure, if he could help, but his presence felt like a new hope breaking through the storm. She tackled his side in a messy hug, forcing him to drop to the ground to stand.

“Jester!” Caleb didn’t have to see him to know he was smiling despite circumstances; he could hear it in Essek’s voice. “I apologize for the wait, it was difficult to get away. I am glad to see you're all here, you’re all...alive. I feared the worst, your messages, they were...hard to decipher.”

“Sorry I called you mama, Essek! We were afraid we were being spied on. Actually-” she looked around horrified. “Oh no, if he’s looking at us right now, he’ll see you too. He might memorize your face to scry on later, I think he can do that, he seems able to do anything.”

“Who?” Essek looked startled.

“Where are you stationed, can you take us there?” Beau stood up quickly.

“We don’t have a lot of time.” Fjord explained.

“Yes, I can.” Essek looked around at them all, quickly taking stock of their expressions and posture. “We can go right now. The fire-”

Caleb had already snuffed it out and was walking towards him. He had a sudden impulse to follow Jester’s example, to run towards Essek and pull him into a hug, craving the solid touch of the friend he had not seen in months, although he was so often in his thoughts. But he couldn’t. It was a wall he had built himself. He couldn’t.

They gathered in a circle again, holding hands despite the spell not asking of this component. It was familiar and comforting, things that seemed so lacking in this journey. Caleb reached for Essek’s hand, he would allow himself this gesture (he was only so strong against the tide of what he felt).

There was something cold and small in Essek’s palm.

“Oh,” Essek looked down when Caleb drew his hand a few inches back. “Apologies, I forgot I was still holding…”

Caleb recognized the object, as it was the other half of Caleb’s own obsidian piece. Two parts, one whole. Caleb grasped his hand, uncaring of the object between them. He tried to smile, it was a grimace, but it would do.

“Thank you.” His voice was low, a whisper. He did not know why, but he didn’t want to be overheard. Caleb squeezed his hand, letting the obsidian dig into them both, the pain grounding him to the moment. Essek did not pull away, but held on. “Thank you.” He repeated.

“Go time.” Beau said.

Essek pulled himself away from Caleb’s eyes and nodded. The swirl of magic around them blended with the snow, grey and white like a dust storm, and then they were off.

Hope and fear clamoring in their hearts.

#shadowgast #critical role fic #shadowgast fic #essek thelyss #caleb #mighty nein #it isn't HEAVY shadowgast but very implied #i wrote this in a rush on friday morning after the episode and then forgot to post it #my fic