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beardedjoel · 2 months

Text

oasis

dbf neighbor! joel miller x f!reader. one shot.

main masterlist | ao3 | kofi

summary: your dad's friend is tasked with looking after you while he's out of town. he ends up finding you somewhere you absolutely shouldn't be. blackmail ensues. 8.3k words.

for @iamasaddie's writing challenge! my genre was dark and the prompt was "please don't tell my dad!" thanks for the amazing challenge! 💌

warnings: 18+ MDNI! dark themes, joel is pervy and sleazy, age gap (reader is under drinking age but an adult so 18-20, joel's age unmentioned but he calls himself an old man and he's 50+ in my head), consensual but there are elements of coercion and blackmail so... (it's dark! okay!), unprotected piv, lap sitting, lap dance, thigh/crotch riding, orgasm denial, pussy pronouns, dirty diiiirty talk, cumshot?, reader has hair that can be pulled and wears lingerie but otherwise is undescribed.

a/n: this is less edited than my usual work but i hope i did it justice! it was very fun and silly to come up with this idea and i ended up loooving how crazy it got!

Keep an eye on her while we’re gone, eh?

The words from your father ring through Joel’s ears when he hears the start of an engine from where he sits in his living room, his view on the plush couch offering a perfect view through the large picture window on the front of the house. Right to where you live with your dad, where he can see the lights of your car come on. Bingo. He’s got you now.

Obsession felt like a strong word, but Joel could describe it no other way as soon as you’d moved in across the street - your dad was a longtime friend and neighbor, talk of his little girl rampant for years before he’d had the chance to meet you. You were going to be going to college nearby, so you moved from where you lived with your mom in California down to your father in Texas, right across the street from where he’d had the pleasure of laying eyes on you for the first time.

Young. Supple. Beautiful. And so damn shy.

He hated just how much it turned him on when your timid eyes would find his. The pervy old man who couldn’t keep his eyes off a young girl - what a god damned cliche he’d become. He kept tabs on you, at first not really realizing he was doing it, eyes peering out the windows to catch you on your way out the door or coming home soon escalated to trying to see into your bedroom window at the front of the house. His time with your father mysteriously seemed to double, then triple, any chance he could to get close to you, see you in your natural habitat, hoping to learn more about this special girl that had captured so much of his attention.

You dressed modestly, too - far too modestly for his liking - he knew your father was a strict man, and assumed just as much about your mother from the way your dad talked about his ex-wife. He never got to see enough of you, except for the few times you had on shorter dresses when the summer heat just got to be too much to bear, and those rare occasions burned themselves into his memory, a bank of images to pull from when he took a hand to his cock and thought of you.

He’s up in a flash, smiling softly to himself as he quickly slides on his shoes and swipes his keys from the front table, exiting the house and seeing your car still parked in the drive. You always sit there too long before driving off, probably playing on your phone, texting your friends, whatever the hell young girls like you do. All Joel knows is he’s grateful it gives him enough time to sneak to his truck before you can get too far, waiting until you pull out and start down the street before starting his own car.

Joel checks the time as he starts down his driveway and sees it’s well after 9:00 pm. Where the hell could you be going, you naughty thing? Your dad has a strict curfew for you, he knows, and if he’s tasked with keeping an eye on you, he might as well do it right.

So he follows you. You get on the highway, heading towards downtown, and Joel’s eyebrows raise as he turns up his music, cruising along behind you, so unaware as he sees the outline of your own head bopping along to your music when he can get a clear enough view.

When you finally park, the city streets bustling with people out late on a Friday night around you, Joel sits in his truck, eyes peeled as he watches you round a building, disappearing. Oasis, the glowing sign on the front says. It looks a bit seedy, this area of town, a bouncer on the outside that you’d given a curt wave to sending Joel’s expression into pure shock before a determined smirk crosses his lips.

It turns out it’s not as exclusive as having a bouncer would make it seem. Joel waits in line with the others, feeling a bit out of place but his appetite to bust you outweighs all of it. Not more than ten minutes later he’s inside, the dark hallway opening up to a massive room laid out in front of him. It’s busy - bodies everywhere, the smell of sweat, alcohol, and arousal permeating everything and Joel blinks to adjust his eyes to the dim mood lighting. A dance floor takes up most of the middle, crowded to the max as music bumps through the speakers, and two bars flank either side, fully packed as well. There are lounges everywhere - cushy leather couches with tables, and as Joel’s vision comes in in full, he sees more private spots along the edges of the room on a slightly elevated area, curtains closing them in.

Too busy taking everything in, he doesn’t even notice the most important detail right away - the waitresses. More specifically, the way they’re all dressed. Gorgeous bodies of all shapes and sizes, parading around in what is essentially lingerie - a lacy black bra paired with a matching set of panties, sheer black stockings and a garter trailing down their legs all the way to the heels that adorn their feet. Joel feels a twinge inside his belly, pulling low and taut when he spots one of the waitresses with thick thighs and a plush stomach grinding on a woman sitting on one of the couches, the receiver throwing her head back in teasing, pleased laughter before taking a long sip of her drink. He continues scanning the room, seeing another man closer to his age being straddled by a different waitress with one of the nicest pairs of tits Joel has ever seen in that same uniform, her hips swaying and grinding so close to his crotch as she gives him a lapdance.

Fuck.

His mind spins faster, blood going hot as it runs through his veins, his cock twitching under the denim of his jeans. It’s been too long - all the pining, the built up frustration, and he’s needy. He finds it hard to believe you’d just be out partying at a place like this, certainly not the neighborly girl he knows. Bringing over leftovers you’d cooked for you and your dad, always with a little treat on the side and a soft smile, your frilly socks and white tennis shoes, collars that never revealed much past the very top of your gorgeous tits. But it still made him fucking crazy, all of it. He wanted to be the one to ruin it, to see who you really are underneath all of the fluff and sweetness. Because at the end of the day, he knows he wasn’t imagining that glint in your eye that told him you had more to offer.

Joel shakes the distractions and his dirty, racing thoughts, eyes scanning the room for you, remembering his mission. He is about to internally ask himself the question when your appearance answers everything he needs to know. Slack jawed, he looks on as you step out from behind one of the bars, tossing a smile over your shoulder at one of the other workers as you start to move carrying a tray full of drinks.

When you emerge in full, strutting your way across the room, you’re wearing it. The outfit. The skimpy bra and panties to match all of the other servers. Your coworkers. Oh, he’s so thoroughly fucked right now, he thinks in a rising panic. But then again, so are you.

“Thank god you’re here! You’re seriously such a life saver,” Kristina says breathlessly as you breeze into the locker room. She’s one of the supervisors here at Oasis, the club you’ve been working at since the beginning of the summer. Sure, you were underage to serve alcohol, but the owners of this club seemed willing to turn a blind eye to a lot of things to gain good talent. Good pay, direct cash, and an insane amount in tips. Enough to pay your way through college, you hoped. Beyond all of that, once you’d gotten into the swing of things you found that you liked it, too. The power you felt in these heels, the way eyes followed you everywhere, you’d never felt so desired, so free or sexually open in your life. Although the only time you’d actually had sex was with your one ex-boyfriend, and it never felt like you do here - sexy, with raw desire filling the air, something so tangible you feel you can reach out and touch it sometimes.

You pull your shirt over your head, unclasping your regular bra and swapping it for the black, lacy one that lives inside your locker. Kristina stands nearby, unfazed by your bare chest as she thanks you. She’d called you about forty five minutes ago, begging for you to come in on your night off when another server, Rochelle, got sick right as things started to pick up. Friday night tips hadn’t sounded so bad when you had no plans apart from watching TV in your dad’s empty house, so it felt like a win.

“No problem,” you say, smiling at her. “Happy to help.”

“You’ve got section five tonight - Justin has Laura covering right now, just switch out when you’re ready, kay?”

You confirm, quickly finishing up your swap into your uniform, admiring yourself in the mirror with a soft smile, still getting used to the look of lingerie on you. You’d have been stupid to keep something like this in the house with either of your parents, not worth the risk if they found out about it.

The noise of the club blares, making you wince for a quick moment as you step out from the calmness of the locker room to the deafening noise beyond and get your bearings behind the bar. It really is busy, but all you can see is money when you glance around, admiring how full the place is tonight.

You’re stopped in the middle of your flow after swinging by the bar to pick up drinks for one of your tables. It’s an extra flirtatious group of men who are practically ready to feast on you, but for all the poorly managed things about this club, they at least have a strict no touching rule with the staff that is enforced by any number of the security guards around. So you get to have your fun, keep your distance, and hope they pay extra for a lapdance from you and tip you well for it.

“You’ve got a, uh, private request,” Justin says, speaking quietly but leaning close to your ear so you can hear him. You pull back, a look of surprise on your face, a questioning glance that he confirms with a nod. “We’ll cover your tables. Room seven.”

Your mind spins faster as you walk towards the room. The rooms aren’t fully private, just a halfway curtain that gives the impression you’re more alone than you are. That luxury doesn’t come cheap, so whoever booked this room and asked for you must mean business. In fact, management hasn’t even put you on serving private rooms regularly yet, reserving that right to the more tenured employees until you work your way up the ladder. You smile, wondering who it could even be that specifically requested you - a regular that loved the banter you’d offered? A new customer who was drawn to you from across the room? It makes your heart skip a little, anticipation and a hint of nervousness coursing through you as you reach the curtain, stepping beyond to see your mystery customer.

Holy shit.

The sultry smile you’d plastered on fades right off your face, replaced with a deep set frown, your mouth open but unable to speak. Your stomach is rapidly dropping to depths it's never known before as your face starts to burn hot, cheeks feeling like they’re on fire. Your arms fly up to your chest, crossing them over as some kind of futile cover of yourself, but his eyes are trained there unashamedly, seeing the way your arms have really just accentuated your cleavage. He’s spread out on one of the loveseats, completely alone, knees wide apart, lap open and desperately inviting when it absolutely should not be.

“M-Mr. Miller?”

Joel was having far too much fun with this. The priceless look on your face that had wiped off the pretty grin you’d had was worth every damn penny he’d spent on this ridiculous room just to get you alone. You think you can cover up, somehow, but it only really offers Joel a better view of your bottom half, the lacy shorts style panties a treat for his weary gaze, the garters sitting against your soft skin one of the most enticing things he’s ever seen. He instantly feels his cock getting hard as his eyes rake up and down your body, settling on where your tits are now pressed together against your crossed arms.

“Mr. Miller?” you stutter out after a long, dense silence between the two of you.

“Don’t cover up on account’a me, sweetheart,” Joel replies cooly, threading his hands together behind his head, looking even more relaxed than when you’d first walked in. Your arms seem to tighten around you, the complete opposite of Joel.

“Wh-what are you -” you start trying to ask, and Joel notices how you suddenly look unbalanced, legs shaking underneath you. You attempt a step forward, bringing yourself further into the room and it gives Joel an even closer look at you, and god damn you’re gorgeous. Your skin looks flawless, so smooth and soft looking - the apex of your thighs coming closer to eye level as you move forward, all adorned by that lace that’s making him wild. He’s never seen anything close to this much of your skin before, and he has half a mind to grab you right here and toss you over his lap, taking everything he wants from you.

“Could ask you the same thing, couldn’t I?” he questions you, enjoying the tease, the way he sees your face screw up a little tighter at the very valid point he was making. You’re caught, and there’s no way around it now, he thinks smugly.

Your face falls, eyes going to the ground and watching your feet shift nervously in your heels. “I-I get it. You made your point. I’ll go home, okay? I know I shouldn’t be here -” you stammer out, and the guilty look on your face tells Joel what he’d already suspected - your dad knows absolutely nothing about this job of yours.

“No, you shouldn’t,” Joel says, but he makes no move to get up, keeping a steady, unrelenting gaze on you. When you flick your eyes up to him, he sees they’re watery, and it makes his insides twinge with a strange mixture of regret and pleasure as he sees the tears brimming along the edges of your eyes, the subtle panic he can see growing.

“You’re bein’ very bad, ain’t ya? ” Joel tuts, and you seem to almost flinch at the words from where you awkwardly stand in front of him still, unsure of what to do, where to go. Joel feels that pleasure growing warm in his gut, knowing he has you right where he wants you. “I mean, look at that outfit, sweetheart -” Joel starts with a low whistle, sitting forward slightly so you can see just how much he’s admiring it, his eyes narrowed in inspection, the weathered lines in his face apparent with the way his brows are raised. “Thas’ a far cry from those clothes you wear on my doorstep, play actin’ a good little girl.”

“N-no! I don’t - I didn’t mean - I am good.” You’re more and more visibly flustered, your arms wrapping around yourself as Joel continues to tease you, intent on bringing you down a few more notches.

Joel gives you a condescending glare. “Darlin’, ain’t nothin’ good about this. Lemme tell you what I think…” He leans back again, staring up at you, not once inviting you to sit, and knowing you won’t unless he does - he wants to make you sweat. “You never got to have that rebellious streak w’ both your parents bein’ who they are, did ya? An’ you thought you deserved it, to have a little fun, didn’t you?”

Your lip quivers and you blink back another set of hot, embarrassed tears, eyes trained back on the dark, faux marble floors, refusing to speak.

“Didn’t you?” he asks again with more bite. Fucking brat. Good thing Joel had plenty of tactics up his sleeve to whip a wannabe brat back into a good girl, he thinks with a sly smile to himself.

“Y-yes! Okay? I wanted to do something… for me,” you finally admit, feeling yourself shake a little at his demanding words.

“Now was that so hard?” Joel asks, becoming acutely aware of just how hard he is, almost painfully so now that he’s been teasing you, fantasizing about this moment for far too long. You shake your head, still hung downwards in shame before bringing your eyes back to his. They look soft, youthful and desperate, and Joel has never felt so turned on in his goddamn life, all the power he’s feeling rushing right to his cock.

“J-just… please don’t tell my dad,” you say, almost quiet enough Joel can’t hear it over the distant bump of the music. But he made it out, the words he’d been hoping you’d say, the ones he knew you’d have to utter.

“I won’t,” Joel starts, seeing the relief flood your face, nearly laughing at how quickly you put stock in his words before even hearing what else he has to say. So naive. “But what’s in it for me, hm? Ain’t gonna keep a secret without a little… incentive.” Joel’s hands plant on his thighs, running up the length of them as he watches your emotions shift in real time, your jaw going slack, eyes widening and barely blinking. You just stutter, completely taken aback and Joel had expected as much - you’re too good of a girl to navigate a situation like this. Good thing he already has his next words planned and loaded up to help you along.

“Laps feelin’ mighty empty, y’know…” Joel muses, leaning back and spreading his palms out on the leather couch next to his thighs. You flash your eyes to his legs, then his face again, mouth gaping open, finally realizing just what he’s asking for.

You can’t believe this is happening to you. You should never have taken this job, kept such a big secret from your dad that you knew he’d absolutely kill you for if he found out. You were technically an adult now, but that didn’t mean you could just throw away his rules while you lived at home with him.

And now you were being blackmailed by his friend. His very handsome friend, but you’re trying hard not to think about that right now. There’s no way he’s serious about this, no way he could actually want this from you? The neighbor girl, his friend’s daughter? Mr. Miller had always been kind, just a bit of a grumpy edge to him but he loved to joke around with your dad. You often caught them laughing together, too shy to have inserted yourself enough with someone who made your skin grow hot just from glancing into his dark, chocolate brown eyes. But without that buffer of your dad, here alone in the dim lighting of the club, it was like he’d become another man.

“Y-you want me to…?” you say, blinking hard as you stare at his thick thighs and crotch, all spread wide open. It’s enticing - normally even with an attractive customer you find yourself thinking of it more as work - fun work, but still work. But with Joel… you’d felt heat pooling between your thighs as he observed you this entire conversation, the desire starting to outweigh the embarrassment you were feeling.

“Paid for it, didn’t I?” he remarks practically, a nip of impatience edging his voice as you swallow hard and step forward.

“Y-you don’t have to… we can get a refund if you don’t want me to do it…” you say, trying to remind yourself not to mumble, but your nerves are getting the best of you.

Joel’s head shakes slowly, his hand drifting out smoothly from his body towards you, tenderly locking on to where your wrist dangles at your side and pulls you closer. Closer. Closer, until he’s pulling you down so that you have to bend down, coming face to face with him. Your cheeks burn, breathing heavy and stunted as the tension in the air thickens, his lips so close to yours. You can’t help but glance at them, the inviting curve of his lips drawing you in, but Joel’s eyes are elsewhere, peering down right between your bodies where your tits are on such display for him, spilling out of the bra at this angle.

“Like I said,” he coos softly, eyes obviously drifting up towards your face, “I need a little incentive to not spill your dirty little secret, darlin’.” A smirk grows on his face before he lets go of your wrist, and you stumble backwards a little.

“Y-you -” you stutter again, trying to counter him, but you come up short. “O-okay…” you mutter with a sigh, taking a deep breath before you hesitantly turn around, facing your back to him.

Joel tuts immediately at your lack of enthusiasm. “None of that, gimme the full show, sweetheart, or the deal’s off.”

You huff quietly, taking a few steps away from Joel, readying yourself. He can see the change in your demeanor already, the more confident strides you take before turning around, facing him again. Then you begin your routine, practiced and ready, pacing towards him with a feline, graceful energy, heels clicking on the floor as you slip one leg in front of the other, heading towards him. You almost hesitate, pushing yourself through the doubt as your hand reaches out, grazing along his shoulder, moving inward towards his collarbone.

Your fingers drag along his chest, where one button of his flannel shirt is open, wishing you could delve your whole hand inside and feel the more than likely gorgeous planes of his chest. Christ, he’s so meaty, so thick everywhere you touch.

A soft rumble escapes his chest before you turn around, grinding your ass downwards and then back up, teasing him by getting a little lower each time. But it’s not enough, he knows you’re holding back, your movements a little stilted and awkward. His cell phone is out of his pocket before he can think much more about it, snapping a photo of the way your ass is grinding down towards him, just enough of your side profile in the photo that it’s undeniably you.

“Come on, know you can do better’n that.” Joel clicks his tongue, making you freeze, hovering awkwardly above him. “Do this for a livin’ lord knows how many nights a week. If you ain’t gonna give me what I paid my hard earned money for I can call your daddy right now… maybe jus’ text him this picture. What d’you think about that?” Joel asks, holding his cell phone forward and into your eyesight. You gasp, hands grabbing for it just as he snatches it away.

“D-delete that! Please!” you cry out, feeling panic squeeze at your chest. Fuckfuckfuck you are so thoroughly fucked right now if Joel has photo evidence.

Joel smiles down at his phone, peering at the image one last time before pocketing it. “No can do, sweetheart. Now, I don’t really wanna have to ask again, yeah?”

You only gape at him for a moment longer before snapping your mouth shut and positioning yourself above his lap again. “F-fine. Jesus,” you mutter angrily, finding that the irritation you’re feeling is starting to spur you on as you begin to move again, feeling yourself turned on by Joel’s musk in your space, the heat of his body radiating towards yours in this close proximity. Not to mention you can sense just how turned on he is, how much this is affecting him as you move with more conviction, hips delicately swinging in front of him. If he wants a show, you’ll give him your best yet, you think with determination.

“F-fuck… attagirl,” Joel lets slip when you brush his crotch with your ass. He’s barely holding it together with your curves swaying tantalizingly in front of him, something even his wildest dreams likely couldn’t have conjured up. He’d never think he’d see you like this - so sensual, so fucking gorgeously in control of your sexual aura that it could make a man lose control. Your customers were beyond lucky, he thinks with a pang of jealousy shooting through him, making his blood boil hotter, his possessive side come out. While he’d been at home pining over you, thinking about you with a hand stroking his own cock, you’d been here - rubbing your pretty ass on all those lucky fucks and their undeserving crotches.

The thought makes him insane, the image of you doing this to any other man, so when you lean back against him, pressing your back to his chest, your ass just beginning to grind on his jeans, his hands go to your hips instinctively trying to bring you down onto him, to claim you. You slow your movements to a stop, leaning your head back towards his ear so that you’re almost entirely pressed against him now.

“Not s-supposed to touch,” you say, you voice the only thing giving away just how nervous you still are.

“Don’t fuckin’ care, if I’m honest,” Joel huffs back quietly, his voice husky and breathless. You bite back a moan as his rough hands wrap around each side of your waist tightly and help guide you that last inch downwards, sending your ass fully rolling over his crotch.

“H-holy shit…” you whimper when you feel the rough denim brush along the outside of your panties. You feel a flush run through you, your skin burning hot as you realize you won’t be able to hide how wet you’ve gotten for very long. It began slowly, just with his brooding, questioning eyes on you, now reaching a fever pitch as you’re in his space and feeling the prominent bulge in his pants.

It’s been far too long since you were satisfied. Truly satisfied.

Your breath catches as Joel fingers wiggle inward a little after hearing how much you’re getting into it, even closer to the waistband of your panties, the two of you facilitating the grinding motion together as you bear down a little more on his lap. Joel lets out a pleased hum, still somehow giving you the sense that he’s the one holding back now. His hands still have an air of respect to them, like they’re vibrating with the need to wrap completely around you and pull you to him, to roam your skin and grab at all the forbidden parts of you.

When the thought flashes across your mind, you realize you want him to.

“T-touch me…” you whisper, immediately clamping your betraying mouth shut as the words float out into the air. You hold your breath, waiting to see if Joel heard you.

“What’s that, gorgeous? Couldn’t quite hear you,” Joel says, his tone a low, mocking sound that tells you he’s baiting you, that he wants to play with his food before eating it. Your eyes narrow before they shut completely, rolling back when he forces your ass to move along his bulge again.

“F-fu- touch me,” you spit out a bit louder. “Please.”

“You poor thing,” you hear him tut from behind you, forcing your hips upwards and away before grasping onto your hands, turning you around to face him. “Can’t get us in trouble now, can we?” he asks tauntingly, his eyes giving you a heated staredown as they widen, almost looking sympathetic if there wasn’t so much of an appetite behind them.

You whimper, visibly whining as your face screws up, squeezing his hands with yours. Joel tugs, so lightly that you’d almost think it was your own idea as you start to come back down towards him, pressing the warmth between your legs against his thigh. You sigh shakily, eyes fluttering shut as you slowly swing one leg over top of his and bear down a little more, straddling his thigh.

“We w-won’t… we won’t…” you breathe out, knowing it’s not the complete truth, but room seven is especially tucked back, hardly getting any traffic. In fact, it was known for bending the rules a bit.

“She’s so needy, huh? You all wet for me, sweetheart, that it? She need a little relief?” Joel taunts, and when you open your eyes to meet his gaze, he’s practically pouting. Your cheeks burn at how desperate he’s making you sound, but your hips twitch of their own accord, sending a zing of pleasure up your spine and you whimper quietly again, giving yourself away even further.

“Y-yes, Mr. Miller…”

“Keep on doin’ your little dance, pretty girl, jus’ right there,” Joel urges you, a hand finding the small of your back, the other locked onto your hip as you start to rock forward, then back again. Relief instantly floods you as your clit brushes against the ripples in the hard denim, making you move harder against him, mouth popped open in fresh ecstasy.

“Close that mouth before I shove somethin’ in it, you fuckin’ tease,” Joel grits out, his eyes burning wildly, finally giving you a glimpse at how affected he is as he keeps his stare on your face, starting to sheen with sweat. Your mouth snaps shut, a stifled moan pulling from your throat and behind your closed lips, threatening to burst out of you.

“This ain’t against the rules? Havin’ a pretty girl ride my thigh?” he asks in cruel teasing, flickering eyes glancing down to where your hips are shamelessly rocking on him.

“I- I don’t - know-“ you choke out, your legs starting to tremble as the pleasure slowly, steadily builds deep inside of you. “I d-don’t care…”

“Riiight, she’s on her rebellious streak now, ain’t she?” Joel mutters facetiously, smiling a devious grin as he watches your face screw up in concentration. You truly don’t care, you can’t care anymore when whatever the hell is going on feels so good. Damn this job, damn Joel’s games, you’re going to get what you need out of this right now, too. Your head is thrown back as your whines and moans escalate, showing Joel just how close you’re getting.

“That’s it, god you’re beggin’ for it, ain’t you? So dirty…” Joel’s hands grip tighter along your hips, starting to drag you inwards, towards his aching, clothed bulge. “Beggin’ for your daddy’s friend's cock while you make a mess all over his thigh, aren’t you? Who would’ve thought a good girl like you’d be wantin’ to get fucked by an old man?”

His words make you clench around nothing, the harsh tone making your insides twist in pleasure as you roll your hips a little faster. “F-fuck… I - I need to - Mr. Miller -” you plead aimlessly, feeling your core tightening, the obscene wetness driving you to full on madness as your pussy aches, cries out for Joel.

Your leg is being dragged over top of him, forcing you to fully straddle his lap, thighs stretched wide and burning at how wide you’re going to accommodate his huge frame. You’re in disbelief at the rough, needy noise Joel makes as soon as your cunt is pulled down onto him, Joel’s hands forcing your hips to start thrusting against him. You nearly lose your balance, wrapping your arms around his neck to hang on as he looks at you with determination. Hands planted firmly on your ass, squeezing hard as he relishes in the feel of finally having you like this, feeling your warm heat seeping through his denim right to where he’s desperate to have you most.

“Joel,” he corrects in his haze, stunting your hips to press down hard on his cock, sending a gasp flying out of your mouth at the sheer size of what’s to come. Your mouth is practically watering, so close to what your body craves now, what it needs. When your fingers graze the button of his jeans, he stiffens, seeming to snap out his lustful fog as he swats your hand away.

“Fuck… later,” Joel says suddenly, using every bit of self restraint to push you back, moving your heat from his bulge, the instantaneous lack of you devastating him to the core.

Your brows quickly knit in confusion at the sudden change in course. “W-why…?” you whisper breathlessly, bringing your lips near his neck, kissing the rough skin, working your way up to his patchy, gray flecked beard. His hand is at the back of your head, yanking you backwards by the hair, tearing your lips off of him in a brutal rush. He holds you there, the pull on your scalp starting to prickle harder as you sit staring at him like a tamed animal being held up by its scruff.

“Can’t fuck you properly in here. Too many fuckin’… people. Prying eyes wantin’ to see what all the fuss is about.”

“I-I can be quiet,” you retort, hating just how much it sounds like begging but the hold he has on you right now is so intense, so inexplicable that you’d say anything, you think.

Joel huffs, a tiny, incredulous snort coming out of his nose. “No, you can’t. Not if I’m doin’ what I plan on doin’ to you. We can’t have anyone come snoopin’, can we?”

You shake your head, suddenly wondering if he’s about to drag you out of here, take you home to his bed, or your bed, you think with a shudder. You feel a pull inside your belly, thinking you just might let him if you don’t get your head back on straight soon.

“An’ you still gotta work the rest of your shift, make your money, don’t you babydoll?” Joel says with a smirk growing, making your face fall completely into a deep frown. “Call it a little punishment for bein’ such a bad, naughty girl, yeah? Then you can finish up givin’ me my piece of the pie.”

You find yourself gaping at him for the umpteenth time tonight in disbelief. He wasn’t going to just leave you… like this? Was he? You can feel your clit pulsing against your panties, your body tense and wound up, on the precipice of coming so hard you saw stars only a few moments ago.

“Up, now,” Joel says, shifting his legs so that you’re forced to move, scrambling up onto your shaky legs, feeling like a newborn fawn getting your footing again.

“W-wait… I already - didn’t I… give you what you want?” you ask, suddenly feeling yourself snapping out of the heady, lust filled haze Joel had you in. This was insane, right? You can’t fuck him, you shouldn’t. It wasn’t right for either of you, and you’d been crazy to have just been this close to letting him stuff you full.

Joel’s head tilts, watching your slightly messy hair and smudged makeup for a few beats with a discerning gaze. “Nah, darlin’, you just gave me what I paid for. This is what I want.”

Your heart and stomach sink to new depths. “N-no. Joel! You said… if I gave you the lap dance you wouldn’t tell my dad. And I gave you a hell of a lot more than that -” Joel stands, interrupting you, coming forward and crowding your space, his hulking mass like a tower next to you, shadowing you with his commanding energy.

“Watch your mouth,” he snips, a hand gripping onto your wrist. “I’m the one callin’ the shots here, an’ I changed my mind once I saw just how pretty that sweet little pussy of yours can be. So here’s what’s gonna happen…” Joel’s fingers come up to ghost along your cheek, trailing down your neck, along the swells of your breasts as he speaks. You can’t help but shudder at the attention, how good it feels on your sensitive, needy skin.

“You go on out there, tell ‘em what a great job you did in here, work the rest of your shift like a good girl, thinkin’ about just how fuckin’ wet you got these pretty panties, how bad she needs a little help from Mr. Miller.”

Your breath is caught in your throat at his words, hitching further as his touch skates further down, sending your hips twitching forward.

“An’ I’ll be waitin’ for you after, darlin’, for what I’m owed.”

Your heart pounds as you slip out the side door and into the alleyway, pausing to let the cool night air wash over you as you gather your thoughts. Your mind is at war with itself, one half of you knowing this is a terrible idea, setting you up for complete disaster in the future. How could you ever face Joel again if you two took it that far? Then again, you weren’t sure how you’d be able to face him in the daylight already, anyways, without your cheeks burning so hot they caught fire. The other half of you was winning, had been winning as you worked the rest of your shift in a complete daze, hardly recognizing your own movements as your body burned hot and needy, mind completely scrambled by the conundrum of your father’s closest friend coming onto you and more.

You spent the rest of your shift coming to terms with the fact that you do want to fuck him. So badly. Even if it’s wrong, a complete mistake in every single way. You also know your mind isn’t to be trusted right now, running on pure horniness and desperation, never having been fucked in the way you know Joel could. His experience, his power, the way his lustful eyes had drank you in like the sweetest balm - it was all too hard to turn down. You turn, looking the opposite way down the alleyway from your car, starting to think you might be able to sneak around the block and get in your car and drive off without him noticing, wondering exactly where he’s waiting for you. You don’t see a soul, hear anyone else in this alley apart from the distant music from inside and chatter from along the main street which is a far cry from where the employee exit to Oasis dropped you.

You take the risk, heart thrumming wildly as you start down the alley, saying a silent apology to Joel in your head, and then yourself for letting this secret come out, knowing Joel was definitely not bluffing if you didn’t follow through on your end of the deal. Better to face punishment from your father than have to deal with the consequences of fucking his best friend and facing the feelings that would come after. You’re only halfway down the alleyway before a warm, rough hand is slapped against your mouth and an arm is draped around your middle and tugging you backwards. A wall of muscle meets you and you whimper loudly behind the hand, starting to yell.

“Shh, shh, no screamin’,” the voice coos, distinctly recognizable. Shit.

“Tryna sneak off on me, huh, pretty girl?” Joel says next to your ear, his neck craning down to breathe you in, groaning. It’s so feminine, so light and soft, the faded scent of your perfume and body wash makes him instantly mad with need for you. His hand slips down, giving your lips some room to answer now that you’ve stopped fighting him, leaning back into his hold a little more.

“N-no,” you choke out, lying. “S-swear.”

“Didn’t change your mind? Want me to send those pretty pictures to your daddy?” Joel coos, starting to walk you towards the brick wall of the building, pushing your body forwards until you’re pressed against the cool, scratchy surface. You hold back a moan when his body leans into you fully, completely dominating you as you’re at his mercy against the wall.

“I j-just d-don’t think we should -” you utter half heartedly, feeling heat rush to your cheeks, fearing what might come next after your suggestion.

“Why’s that?” he asks, dripping with condescension. “Seemed you couldn’t wait to get stuffed full of me not too long ago, yeah?”

“I-it’ll be weird after, w-won’t it? How can we… be around my dad? How can you?” You finally find your voice, your bravery, to ask him the question you’d been thinking the entire night.

A small chuckle blows past the side of your head from where Joel’s mouth sits against your head. “Think we both learned tonight I’m willin’ to keep a secret,” he says, his voice getting more harsh, a needy coarseness to it that sends goosebumps along your skin. Joel feels a frenzy overcoming him when he notices your thighs clenching, how shallow and wanting your breaths are becoming now. He can’t wait much longer… can’t stand the torture he’s endured at your sweet teasing for a second longer.

“I-I want it…” you finally say in a harsh whisper, your resolve faded within seconds. Your ass ruts back into his hardness, an ache that hadn’t subsided in the least in the last hours as he waited for you. Patiently. Like he had already been all of these months.

“You know I’m gonna ruin anyone else f’you, darlin’, don’t you?” he asks as his lips trace along your shoulder, now clad in a tank top that you’d changed back into. The bits of bare skin he touches taste like heaven, feel almost unbearably soft and inviting against his plush lips. He couldn’t possibly deserve any of this, but he couldn’t help but take it, anyhow. He could pay for his sins later. Your neck is next on his list, another supple spot of heaven to taste as he mutters the words again. “Don’t you?”

You just nod at first, dumbstruck by the feel of his lips, turning your head to try to meet them. “Yes,” you tell him softly, knowing it’s the truth, and there isn’t a turning back from this moment anymore. His lips are suddenly all there is, devouring your own whole as he takes in bounds, your tongues and teeth and mouths in a desperate clash, panting into one another as Joel starts to tug at your jeans, fingers flying desperately to tear them down.

You let him.

The second he’s pushing into you, you see bright white flash across your vision - that pulse of pain shooting through the very fabric of your being, your nerves lit up and screaming out from deep inside of you. Joel’s groan is barely audible through the ringing in your ears as he doesn’t stop, finding solace in your tight heat when he pushes himself into you in full. It’s heaven incarnate, you are heaven incarnate, he thinks, practically panting out the words as he feels your wet tightness pulling him in, walls pulsing as you adjust to the sheer volume that is Joel. Your cheek is crushed against the brick, mouth propped open in shock, the rough scrape on your face the only thing keeping you grounded as you whine out a long, wanton sound, something completely foreign to you.

“So… fuckin’... dumb on this cock,” Joel utters as he starts to move, a slow drag of his cock out and back in before he makes good on his promise to ruin anyone else for you, to never have a comparison to the blinding pleasure you feel rocking your entire universe as he quickly ruts into you. “Fuckin’ heaven.”

“J- fuck -” you stutter out, completely speechless. When one arm wraps around you, finding your clit, needy and puffy from hours of torturous edging, everything else melts away. The dark alley, the fact that you could be seen at any moment, the way you weren’t even sure you trusted Joel to keep your secret despite you following through on your end - none of it fucking mattered anymore.

“W-wanted this so bad, y’don’t know what you do to a man, sweetheart… Jesus fuck,” Joel says, uncharacteristically soft as his hips roll, sending your own bouncing onto his hurried fingers swirling along your clit. Desperation clings to the both of you now, hot and heavy air, hurried movements like this could be torn away from the two of you any second.

“Joel… I’m fu- I’m close, so close, please…” you rush out, feeling a pull of warmth at your center, his cock brushing along just the right spot to send you to that edge. You start to moan louder, the noise echoing in the open space around the two of you, your hand hurriedly slapping over your mouth to muffle it as the high starts to rock through you. His name screams from behind your hand, the sound still clear enough to send Joel to a state of crazed fervor, thrusting into you at an impossible pace, sending you bouncing harder against the wall. You twitch and shake, your eyes rolling back as you come harder than you have in months, maybe ever. Just like he’d promised, the absolute bastard.

“Fuckin’ creamin’ on this cock, shit, you’re so fuckin’ wet,” Joel marvels breathlessly as the obscene squelching of your bodies meeting only gets louder. “Oh, good girl, such a pretty, messy slut for a dirty old man, aren’t you?”

“G-god, yes, fuck… I am…” you whimper out with flustered nods, completely spent as you come down from your high, letting Joel use your cunt to chase his own now. You twitch at the overstimulation, your body still tingling pleasantly as he turns you into his own personal fuck toy, your body his for the taking.

“Pretty as a picture, all fucked out like this,” he says slyly one hand planted on the wall next to you now, the other playing lazily with your aching clit. “Never gonna be able to give me up now, are you?”

You shake your head, lost in the moment with your answers as you feel another orgasm washing over you, less intense but still pleasant waves of pleasure rolling through while you gasp for breath, completely full of Joel each time he thrusts heartily into you, stealing away your air.

“Please… c-can’t…” you mumble through your climax, hardly able to take the stimulation anymore but knowing the sick little part of your brain is happy to do it for him, let him use you until he’s completely spent himself.

You don’t have to wait much longer for your wish, hearing Joel grunting, almost whimpering when he’s suddenly gone from you with a wet, slick pop, leaving you cavernous empty. He barely makes it out of you before his hand grips his cock, twitching in his palm as he comes towards the ground right in between your legs, ropes of cum coating your pulled down jeans and underwear, the brick wall, the pavement below you. His forehead is pressed to your back, sticky and hot as he catches his breath for a silent beat.

You’ve never felt anything like this, this satisfaction, this pure unadulterated filthiness and pleasure. The addiction already grips you, your poor, sore cunt already anticipating the next time he could ruin you.

But then it hits you like a train, pulling you out of your reverent little bubble - this can’t happen again. It’s out of your system, out of his, and now you both have a secret to keep. You start to pull your pants up, the movement seeming to bring Joel to his senses, reaching down along with you.

“Sh-shit, here, let me,” he says in a rasp, tugging your jeans up, the immediate feeling of wetness sticking to your body and making you cringe. “Little souvenir for ya,” he comments cockily, knowing his cum is now sticking to your skin, knowing that thought will sustain him for at least the next few hours. But that’s wishful thinking, he realizes, knowing that he could find himself buried in you the entire night, over and over again, considering hauling you away to do just that when you interrupt his thinking.

“I- I’m sorry…” you mutter, not even fully sure of why you even say it. For some reason, you are sorry that you put the two of you in this position, even if it ended in something so incredible that you have a hard time even putting it into words.

Joel spins you to face him, thumbing your chin and pinching it, bringing your face to look him in the eyes. They look a little softer than they had inside the club, more like the neighbor you’ve come to know. So charming and disarming when he wants to be.

“Don’t be,” he says, leaning down to kiss you more gently than he had before, something tender and sweet that you find yourself immediately falling for, body melting into his as you hang your arms around his neck, wondering when along the way you started feeling so comfortable with this.

“Besides,” Joel adds, a devious smirk pulling his lips upwards. “Your daddy ain’t home for a few more days. Think we can find a few more ways to convince me to keep your little secret.”

#joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x you #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fanfiction #pedro pascal x reader #x reader

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808airsoftbros · 7 months

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Tight Pants Pt.II (Kim Sohee/Giselle/Karina) (BXG) (S)

Author: Part II of my original Tight Pants smut oneshot. Hope you enjoy it and if you want to check out my Masterlist for more oneshots :)

Y/N's POV

"Ah~. Come on, Y/N, can you please just go out with me for once~?" Sohee-Noona bugged and I groaned.

For the last ten minutes, I was in the middle of a gaming session with the boys, it was all going peaceful and well until my Noona barged into my room uninvited and won't stop begging me to come hangout with her friends.

Despite my efforts to focus on the game and ignore her obnoxious antics, she takes off my headset and steals my controller.

"Hey! Give that back!" I demanded and she smiled.

"Only if you agree to hangout with me~," She replied and I sighed.

"Promise?" I hesitantly asked.

"Promise," She answered after nodding.

She hands me back the controller and headset before throwing me one of my outfits and telling me to put it on.

Changing into the clothes that Sohee-Noona gave me, I went down the stairs and she took my head leading me into her expensive ass mercedes benz AMG.

Did I forget to mention that she's an idol? That's why she can afford all the luxury products she wants and my closet is full of Gucci and Louis Vuitton clothes that she gifted me in the past.

Anyway, she drives me over to wherever the meeting location is, which is a fancy restaurant.

"We're here, little bro," She nudged.

We get out of the car, and there were too other girls waving at us and I assumed it was Sohee's friends.

"Hey, Sohee~!" One of them greeted.

"Sup, Rina! How have you been~?" Sohee greeted and they hugged each other.

"Eh, nothing much," She answered and her other friend eyed me.

"Is this your step bro that you mentioned?" She asked and she nodded.

"Yep, this is Kim Y/N, my step brother," Sohee answered and she nodded.

"I see, well, Y/N, my name is Giselle and this here is Karina. It's nice to finally see you~," Giselle introduced herself and I chuckled.

Sohee locked arms with me, I followed her lead into the restaurant, and we checked in with the waiter. He leads us into a private dining room full of fancy silverware and plates.

"Please have a seat, ladies," The waiter insisted.

I sat across from Giselle with Karina sitting next to her and I sat next to Sohee-Noona. The waiter pours water into our glasses.

"I'll give you all time to decide what you wish to order," He said before leaving the room.

Looking through the menu, the prices were ridiculously expensive with steak and lobster being over $50 each but I knew it wouldn't even put a dent on Sohee's account.

"I think I want to try the salmon," Karina mentioned.

"Mind as well get the salmon too," Giselle replied.

Examining the seafood selections I felt something rubbing my ankle and I looked down to see it was Karina responsible. I peeked over the menu and she was acting all natural.

Rolling my eyes, I decide I'll go with the medium-rare wagyu steak, and Sohee-Noona goes with the lobster tails.

"So, Y/N, what do you do for a living?" Giselle curiously asked.

"Uhm, for now, college," I answered.

"Ah, what are you studying?" She asked.

"Engineering," I simply replied and she nodded.

Still feeling the sensation of Karina's bare feet rubbing on my feet, I felt her move up to my leg and my thigh making me nervous.

Sohee-Noona gave me a look of concern and asked what was wrong but I asssured everything was fine and Karina was still playing the innocent one.

"Do you have a girlfriend by any chance~?" Karina asked and I shook my head.

"No, not interested in finding one yet," I answered and she smiled.

"I see, well, I'm always available if you're interested," She teasingly suggested and I blushed making her giggle.

It didn't help that Karina was starting to spice things up, she moved her foot to my crotch and I grinned resisting her temptations.

Thankfully, they didn't pay any mind to me as the waiter comes in to write down our orders. Once we finished making our orders he exits the room and I sighed in relief.

"I must say, bestie, your little bro is cute~," Giselle butted in.

"I know right~?" Sohee replied before ruffling my hair.

"Aish, stop it Noona!" I annoyingly said and pushed her hand off my head.

"Awww~. Look at the cutie~," Giselle teased.

Excusing myself to go to the restroom, Sohee grabbed my hand asking if I needed help but I refused her offer. I walked out the room, easily found the restroom.

Right when I was about to enter the bathroom, my hand was grabbed and I was forced into the woman's bathroom.

Before I could figure out who snatched me, a finger was placed on my lips telling me to keep quiet and I was shocked to see it was Karina who had a smirk plastered on her face.

"W-What are you doing...?" I nervously asked.

Without saying a word, she drags me into an empty stall, locks the door, and gets on her knees rubbing my dick.

"Oh, baby boy~. You've had my attention the moment I've laid eyes on you and you know how idols always get what they want... Right?" She asked and I nodded.

"Well, do you know what I want right now~?" She seductively asked and I gulped as she came up to my ear before whispering... "You,"

Before I knew it, she unbuckles my belt, pulls down my pants and underwear revealing my monsterous cock making her drool at the size.

"Good, I never knew you had such a big cock, baby~," She moaned before jerking it off slowly.

Flinching at her delicate touch, my cock hardens and grows and she eventually takes it into her warm mouth and I moaned.

Bobbing up and down, I was nervous that someone could walk in here and catch us.

"N-Noona, what if someone catches us?" I asked and she takes my cock out of my mouth.

"You let me worry about that~," She answered before going back to blow me.

She kept going for the next ten minutes and I couldn't resist to cum inside her mouth and she swallowed every bit of it with delight.

"Mmmm~. So tasty~. Mommy will have more of you later~," She said before helping me put my pants back up.

We quietly come out of the bathroom, rejoin the others at the dining room and they wondered what took us so long? Karina lied saying that she came to check on me and had a little accident.

As embarrassing as it is, they bought it, and the waiter comes in with a tray of mouth watering dishes.

The food was the best I've ever tasted in my life, the steak was juicy and tender, and my Noona's enjoyred their food as much as I did.

After we finished eating, my Noona's paid the pill and left the waiter a generous tip before leaving the restuarant.

Looking up at the sky, it was cloudy as hell meaning it was gonna rain soon-

Well I spoke too soon didn't I? Out of nowhere, the rain came pouring in and everyone immediately seeked shelter in the restuarant, took out their umbrellas, and rushed to their cars.

Unfortunately, I had nothing to protect me from the rain and in no time I was soaking wet. I've never in my life felt so miserable. My socks were wet. My feet are wet.

"Omo~. Come on, let's go~!" Sohee-Noona said and we rushed back to the car.

Karina and Giselle ran back to their respective sports cars and we met up at Aespa's dorm. Since Winter and Ningning are away visiting friends and family, it would be just us four.

We hurried back to their dorm, I was soaking wet, I was cold as shit and felt like I bathed in snow fully naked.

We entered their dorm, Karina guides me to the bathroom and Giselle places a spare change of clothes on the counter.

"Mind giving me some privacy Noona?" I asked and she gave me a devious smirk.

"Are you sure you don't need any help?" She asked and I shook my head.

"No, Noona, I'm fine," I assured and she pouted before leaving me alone.

Taking off my drenched clothes, I hop inside the shower, turn the knob for the warm water. Feeling the water flowing through my skin felt euphoric as ever and the coldess immediately faded away.

However, I cannot help but feel as if I'm being watched, I looked out the shower glass and I was surprised to see someone's phone camera recording me.

"Yah! What the hell?!" I called out and whoever it was ran off.

I could only guess it was one of my Noona's trying to get a peak at me and use the footage to rub their pussies later.

Anyway, I finished taking my shower, I put on the spare change of clothes but they were tight as shit as they were made for girls and it didn't help that the sweatpants were showing my bulge.

Thinking of a way to cover it up, I grabbed one of the towels on the rack, warpped it around me. I looked rediculous but it was only for one night.

I walk down the stairs, I got lots of looks from the girls wondering why I was still wearing a towel around my waist.

"Uhm, Y/N, is the pants I gave you too small?" Giselle asked.

"Huh? Oh, it's fine," I answered with a reassuring smile.

"Okay then...?" She awkwardly muttered before going back to watch her shows.

Looks like they bought it for now... I sit on the couch along with Sohee-Noona and she wraps her arm around my neck. Slowly pulling my head to lay her shoulder.

"Noona when can we leave?" I quietly asked.

"As soon as the storm passes," She answered and I nodded.

While finding peace and solace laying on Sohee-Noona's shoulder, I felt a tug on the towel and I opened my eyes seeing Karina with a rather curious look on her face.

"Yah, Noona what are you doing?" I asked and she gave me a skeptical look.

"What's the towel for?" She asked and I gulped.

Suddenly, the show began playing an errotic scene making me slightly erected. Giselle was all too focus on the show and Sohee-Noona was fast asleep while Karina went on the assault on my pants.

I signalled her to stop but she didn't take the hint so I quietly tried to get her hands off the towel.

"I just want a look!" She quietly said and I shook my head.

"What is going on...?" Sohee-Noona asked before yawning and when saw what was going on.

"Yah! Rina! What are you doing?!" She angrily asked and Karina-Noona huffed.

"I just want to know why Y/N's wearing a towel for..." She answered before crossing her arms.

Then Giselle turned her attention toward us, she asked what was wrong and I explained the situation. She rolled her eyes in amusement and demanded to take my towel off.

At first, I refused but I didn't have a say as Giselle forcefully took the towel away from my waist and their jaws dropped seeing the massive bulge in my tight sweatpants.

"Now what do we have here...?" Giselle asked as she examined my dick poking out my sweatpants.

"U-Uhhhh..." I muttered as I was too flustered to say anything.

Sohee-Noona smirked and nodded to the others, Giselle and Karina nodded back with an devious smile. It was obvious they were up to something.

"W-What's going on?" I nervously asked and they giggled.

"Oh, you're so silly you know that~? We planned this whole thing all along~," Karina answered and my eyes widened.

"W-What?!" I exclaimed.

"You weren't exactly paying attention to the weather forecast so we planned this hangout. We knew you'd be drenched in no time so we figured it'd be convenient to bring you to our dorm," Giselle explained and I was speechless.

"N-Noona? Why?" I asked and she giggled.

"Remember that lost bet a while back? If you don't get a girlfriend by this year, will take you ourselves," She asked and I nodded.

"Y-Yes, but I thought you all were just joking!" I replied and they laughed.

"Oh, you innocent child, you should know better that we don't play around with such things. Now you belong to us~," Sohee-Noona whispered the last part sending chills down my spine.

I was pinned to the bed with Giselle and Sohee-Noona holding my arms down, my pants along with my underwear were pulled down revealing my ten inch monter cock.

"So yummy and delicate, what a beautiful cock your little baby has~," Giselle admired.

"I know~," Sohee-Noona replied before licking her lips.

"We're going to make sure your balls are drained tonight~," Giselle whispered in my ear.

Not wasting a moment, Karina and Giselle switched places, she takes my cock in her warm mouth, and she was tighter than Karina's mouth and it felt amazing.

"Does her mouth feel good baby~," Karina asked and I viciously nodded.

Giselle encouraged by my words of compelation, she bobs her head faster and I moaned loader before Karina shuts me up placing her lips onto mine.

Slipping her tongue inside of my mouth, I easily lost the battle for domination as she was more experienced than I am. My mind was also occupied being sucked off by Giselle and I was starting to edge.

"I-I'm going to cum!" I warned and but she kept going so I came in her mouth.

"Mmm~. What a delicious treat that was~," Giselle moaned out after licking her lips after eating a scrumptious meal.

"Let's get into the main show now~. I already tasted my little brother a many times before, am I right~?" She sedutively asked and I slowly nodded.

Yep, Sohee-Noona and I did do it sometimes whenever she felt horny besides we're not even blood related and I didn't have a say in anything.

"Alrighty then," Giselle replied before stripping naked revealing her delicate and thicc figure.

"Let's not keep our baby waiting then~," Karina said before also stripping naked and I drool at her massive tits.

"Aww~. Is my baby boo a tit guy~?" She teasingly asked and I nervously nodded.

"There's no need to be ashamed in that~," Sohee-Noona assured before taking off her clothes.

To my surprise all together, they did their best to wrap their boobs around my dick and it was the most amazing feeling ever. My mind and body was going to be broken if these sexy girls made me came.

My dick drowning in these girls titties and it didn't take long for me to squirt out my cum all over their bodies and faces.

"Wow, you came a lot for us, baby~. You must really love our tits~," Giselle pointed out.

Exhausted out, I panted to catch my breath as these girls were made me go through nothing but pure ecstasy and pleasure but they were far from done with me.

Without warning, Karina slams her pussy onto my dick making me yelp and she began riding me like an angry bull.

"Oh fuck yes~!" She screamed while riding me and I loudly moan.

Then, I was smothered by Sohee-Noona's and Giselle's tits forcing me to suck them and play with them at the same time. I tried my best to multi-task between the three ladies.

"Mmm~. You're doing such a good job, baby~," Sohee-Noona complemented before moaning.

About ten minutes in, Karina was already close to cumming and I put my hands on her hips to thrust into her and she squirted all over my dick.

"That was great..." Karina muttered before climbing off.

"Me next~!" Giselle announced and inserts my cock into her pussy.

Hardly believing how tight as hell she was, I clenched my face as she slowly began riding me. Giselle could only scream out of pleasure as she picked up the pace.

I was about to cum deep inside of her womb until she squirted all over my dick making me nearly blue ball.

"Well now, guess those two weren't enough, and you were edged twice, right?" Sohee-Noona asked and I nodded.

"Hehe~. Allow me to help you with that~," She said and got on all fours. She lightly shakes her plum ass signalling me to fuck her and I did so with delight.

Going in and out as fast and hard as I can, Sohee-Noona kept moaning out my name and I gave her ass a few spankings making her yelp.

I grabbed her tits and played with it adding to the pleasure as I pounded the living daylights out of her.

"H-How... Ah! C-Close?" She stuttered.

"Very close, Noona!" I warned.

"Then fuck me like it's the last thing you'll ever do on this planet! Breed me!" She demanded.

Giving into her demands, I picked up the pace and went slammed my dick into her in and out making her a moaning mess. About ten seconds later, we came at the same time and I sighed in relief as my balls are now drained.

I collapsed onto the couch, I could barely feel my hip or my legs or even my cock. Then, the three sexy girls slowly climbed up and hurdled up to me.

"You were amazing, baby~," Giselle said before pecking my cheek.

"We should do this everyday~," Karina suggested and pecked my other cheek.

"If you ever feel fustrated, horny, or needy, just ask one of us and will be more than happy to help you as long as you help us," Sohee-Noona said and I thanked her before pecking her lips.

Right after that stormy night, my life changed 360 with mostly pleasing the girl's needs. We did it in the changing room, the bathrooms, our cars, and hell even in public places when no one is looking.

But all I cared about was that I could be with them and grateful that I have such graceful and beautiful girls to look after me.

#kpop #kpop idol #kpop gg #bxg #x male reader #kpopidol #alice sohee #kim sohee #aespa #aespa karina #aespa yoo jimin #yoo jimin #giselle #aespa aeri #girl group smut #kpop smut

693 notes · View notes

slut4sugu · 11 months

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— 𝐌𝐘 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋, 𝐃𝐎𝐍𝐓 𝐂𝐑𝐘 [𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜] 𝐄!𝟒𝟐 𝐌𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬

Miles x Fem!Black reader

Including: miles scaring reader, comfort fluff, slight angst to fluff, bro I almost cried 3 times while writing this I can’t make this shit up bro

Genre: angst-fluff

🎸: 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐔𝐬- 𝐋𝐚𝐛𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐡 𝐟𝐭. 𝐙𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐚

It was the weekend and you were hoping that you would be able to see miles if you stayed up long enough, you knew he hated the fact that you would stay up to such an ungodly hour just to see him check up on you, but you couldn’t help it this time. You haven’t seen him since early this week and you really missed him, FaceTime calls and texts helped but you wanted him. You wanted to feel his touch or his weirdly comforting dark presence, you wanted to know if he was okay- wait what time was it? You looked at your clock digital white clock to see it was almost 2 am. You quickly sat up and searched for your phone underneath the bedsheets before finding it, unlocking it only to find no new text messages from miles. Your heart sank, what if he was hurt? What if he got shot? What if he never comes home?

So many what-ifs ran through your mind you didn’t even feel the the tears that blurred your vision and ran down your cheeks, you grabbed the plushie that Miles had gotten for you on your birthday and held it close too your chest. It still smelt like him, tears streamed down your face as you worried for your boyfriends safety. You heard your heartbeat in your ears, only wanting to hear his to calm you down- “Ma?” Your head quickly shot up and looked to your window, “Miles?” You froze, just staring at him in the dark making out every feature you could to verify it indeed was our boyfriend, who climbed into your apartment and walked towards your side of the bed. “Why are you cryin? Did someone threaten you mami?” His tone serious as he cupped your face, wiping away your tears with his thumb. You slowly shook your head no, “I..I thought something happened to you. You didn’t text me it was late I thought-“ You couldn’t fathom the mere idea of miles being dead and broke down in tears. “Hey hey mami, I’m here. I got held up and had to take care of sum bullshit, but I’m sorry.” He sitting down on your bed, he lifted you into his lap. One arm going under your knees and the other one on your upper back, you instantly buried your face into the crook of his neck.

Your arms clinging onto him tight as your tears continued to fall, your body now leaning fully on him. The sight of you so broken and scared made miles rethink the idea of being the prowler, if it meant that there was a 50/50 chance of something like this happening again he wanted out. He hated seeing you like this. Miles’s hands now shifted one on your lower back, the other on the back of your head. “I’m sorry princesa,” He whispered into your ear, his tone soft as he pressed a kiss to your cheek. You looked up at him with happy and yet sad eyes before looking back down and nuzzling your head further into his neck. Then a hand that was gripping the collar loosened and went down to hug his torso, “Promise me something miles, please.” “Anything amor.” “Always keep me updated, I don’t want to assume th-that your-“ Your voice started to waver before miles shushed you and rubbed soothing circles into your waist with his thumb. “I promise, and that won’t ever fuckin happen ma.” You inhaled his scent, the smell of expensive cologne and rain making you feel safe. “Please stay the night.” You asked, your voice sounding small seeming as though you thought he would say he couldn’t “I will mi amor.” He pressed another kiss to your forehead and his grip on you tightened, “I won’t leave you alone.”

Miles knew he would get lectured for not reporting back to uncle Aron that night, but he didn’t care. At that moment at 2:23 am, all he could possibly care about is you. The angel he held in his arms.

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natsukishinomiyaswife · 24 days

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Hi Sheepy!!!! Congratulations for all the followers 🎉🎉!! Your writings are amazing, so you totally deserve them all!!! This event sounds so fun, especially with the special orders, I was super excited about it!!

On that note, I'd like to order a baked pear (shocker) with rosewater, please!! The 50/50 chance and it being listed as a special enticed me aha. I hope the Cathie Cafe goes well!!! Good luck and congrats again!!

Hello Kris! ☆

Ahhh thank you so much for your order! ♡ And oh my gosh Kris you are too sweet!! Thank you so much for your kind words! ♡ I wonder if Jack will get a happy ending, or an angsty ending? Let's find out, shall we? ♡ I hope you enjoy! ♡

This is part of an event I'm doing where people can request stories by placing orders! For more information, please refer to this post! ♡

⋆ 𝓙𝓪𝓬𝓴 𝓗𝓸𝔀𝓵: 𝓣𝓻𝓾𝓮 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮'𝓼 𝓚𝓲𝓼𝓼 ⋆

One order of baked pears and a glass of rosewater, coming right up! ♡

⋆ No one was quite sure what had happened, whether it be a potion gone wrong or a curse someone cast on you. Everyone was scrambling trying to wake you, laying in your bed unaware of the chaos transpiring. You look so delicate, so fragile as you laid there fast asleep. Jack couldn't help but sit there, staying by your bedside while the others looked for a solution.

⋆ He couldn't help but blame himself, wondering if there was something he could have done to prevent this. He looked around to make sure no one was looking before stroking your cheek, longing for you to wake up. Things just weren't the same without you, your voice, your smile. Seeing your face in the morning as he ran by always gave him the boost he needed for the day, taking the same path out of habit. He realized his mistake when he looked in the direction where you would usually be waiting and saw no one there, remembering what happened. You wouldn't be standing there, waving at him as he passed by anytime soon. The thought made his chest hurt.

⋆ There was so much unsaid between you both, so much unspoken. He knows he's not the best at showing it, but surely you knew how he felt...right? A few hours later Vil came with some of the others, informing everyone of what they found. Apparently you had interacted with a cursed object, putting you into a deep sleep. The only way you would wake up is with true love's kiss, unless they tried to find a different cure, though their efforts would be in vain.

⋆ The idea of true love's kiss made his heart pound in his chest, though he didn't let it show. As a wolf beastman, he knows people of his kind usually have one mate they keep for the rest of their lives, with himself already considering having that type of life with you. So the idea of him being your true love, of him waking you up with his kiss, made his tail wag at the thought.

⋆ The others looked at him expectantly, already assuming he would be the one to kiss you. It made the tips of his ears turn red to have everyone stare, bending down so he was leaning a few inches away from your face. There was doubt in the back of his mind, the idea that perhaps his kiss won't wake you up, that he isn't your true love. He ignored it as he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, a quick peck that lasted only a second. He didn't want to linger without your consent, wanting your first kiss to be more special than this one. He waited with baited breath as he looked for any of sign of movement on your face, his heart sinking as time passed.

⋆ His ears perked up as he noticed your eyes slowly flutter open, taking a moment before turning towards him. Your eyes were half lidded as you looked at him, confused as to where you were. His tail started wagging rapidly behind him as his body began to shake, pulling you into a bone crushing hug. He couldn't believe it worked, that his kiss woke you up. You, his true love, his mate. He looked forward to seeing what the future had in store for you both ♡

I hope you enjoyed your meal, and thank you for visiting the Cathie Cafe! ♡

𝓣𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓴 𝔂𝓸𝓾! ♡

#♡.sheep writes #♡.kris #♡.twst #♡.jack howl #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #jack howl #jack howl x reader #jack x reader

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thesparklingwriter · 1 year

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𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒘𝒊𝒄𝒆

tags: zhongli x gn!reader, fluff, angst, reader is the sibling of guizhong, themes of loss (please lmk if I've missed any important tags)

word count: 1.6k

notes: before you read, i recommend taking a quick look at the ask this request came from! i may have possibly missed out some scene setting as a result of assuming every knows the context. I had so much fun doing this :) don't tell anyone but i actually shed one or two tears, but i was listening to the ballad of jane doe as i wrote it so can i truly be blamed? @cheezybell , i hope this lives up to your expectations <3 if there's anything formatting-wise that I've forgotten about tell me tomorrow cause it's now past midnight and i'm going to bed :)

Masterlist | taglist form

The world had been silent since you died. The god of war was accustomed to loss, but none had worn on him so heavily but yours. Of course, you weren't his only acquaintance, but the uncertainty of your well-being weighed heavily on him. The others were lost to the winds, their memories infused into fields of lilies and violent sunrises, all of which he observes with a detached melancholy.

To protect yourself after sustaining an almost fatal blow, you'd employed a tactic Morax himself had taught you—a tactic that had a 50 per cent success rate, a tactic for a worst-case scenario, a tactic shared with you because he couldn't bear the thought of you leaving him forever. If he'd have known that he'd be here now, seated beside your lifeless body, quietly begging someone, something, to save you, his friend, his companion, his… It doesn't matter now.

He wouldn't indulge himself in such thoughts. It was selfish. You'd tried to protect yourself for his sake, and here he was, wishing that you'd died so he would have had the chance to find your reincarnated soul in the faces of those in the harbour. You'd sworn you'd always be with him, regardless of the circumstances, irrespective of the fact that you loved him and he didn't–couldn't ever know. You'd watch him from a distance, how he brought smiles to people's faces and how the people of Liyue worshipped the ground he walked on. What would he want with you? The forgotten kin of a well-known adeptus—adept at nothing much but fading into the mist. What could you offer him that thousands of being on Teyvat couldn't?

"If I'm the reason why you aren't returning," Morax says softly, his voice permeating the silence of the cave he hides you in. "Please rest assured that I expect nothing of you upon your return. Simply focus on yourself. That's all I ask."

As long as he knew you were alive, Morax would accept being apart from you. But until he was aware of your recovery, he'd keep visiting.

And so he did.

Millenia go by before there's even a slight change in your appearance. He visits you at the end of every era he finds himself in—the end of the archon war, Liyue's sudden economic boost, his 'death' at the hands of the Fatui… He keeps you up to speed on it all. Of course, if you want to survive in this world once you awaken, you have to know what's going on, do you not?

This time, when he sits beside you to tell you about how Liyue no longer has an archon and the new life he hopes to pursue, his heart swells with hope. In the dim light of the almost freezing cave, Morax is almost convinced that he spies the condensation of your breath in the air. But simultaneously, the years of hoping and praying for your return have hardened his heart to hope. It's a selfish emotion, one he should know better than to entertain. But though there's a voice in the back of his head, telling him that he's hoping and praying and waiting for nothing, it's you he's waiting for. The one who always made him laugh, listened to him as he mused aloud about the wonders of Teyvat, and helped him mediate arguments between Cloud Retainer and Guizhong. He can't let you go.

"Change is constant in this world," He says to you, noting the slight colour in your cheeks and the flicker of your eyelids. "But I will continue to wait for you, to cultivate your memory such that nothing can dull its shine."

It was a promise to a friend, a declaration of love, an acceptance of defeat. He strokes your hair lightly, an intimate gesture he always longed for when you were alive, one he indulges himself in, in case it wakes you up. And the contact shocks you. You can feel it and hear him, but you can't reach out. You can't hold him in your arms and tell him that it's okay, that you loved him then, and you love him now, and nothing he could ever say or do could ever change that.

But you never had the will to do so when you were awake, and now, as you cling onto his voice to drag yourself back into reality, your resolve is too much for your body to bear, and you explode into fine mist, impossible to catch or hold, or trap. Morax realises that, and though his heart disappeared with you, he accepts his fate—forever longing for a being he might never see again.

✧

Finding yourself in Liyue after the years passed is nothing short of a learning curve. You learn early on that Morax was killed by the Fatui in an act of cold cruelty, a discovery that leaves you fuelled with rage. But casting your mind back to past conversations with Morax himself reminds you of a hypothetical game you and Guizhong used to play with him to pass the hours. Morax always had a fascination with the idea of faking his demise if it was what was necessary for Liyue's survival. Or course, that kind of morbid practicality makes Morax who he is, and you struggle to believe that he'd leave Liyue without a fight. He'd waited millennia for your return, but you're supposed to believe that he'd abandon his nation without so much as a second thought? Impossible.

So you set to finding him. Regardless of what form he's taken on or the lies he's employed to stay under the radar, you will find him. It starts with assimilating into Liyue's society, working hard to establish yourself as an upstanding member of the harbour, always found helping with a smile on your face. You'd smile innocently when asked what you charged for your help and services. "I'm something of a history buff," you'd say. "I'm researching Morax's death—undoubtedly this is an important date in the history of Liyue and i'd like to hear more about it from those who experienced it."

Of course, locals were more than happy to help—to share stories of their valiant archon, who left too soon, but left his nation in such good stead for the future. Most, if not all, the leads you were given were dead ends, an impressive mix of decorated truths and half lies. That was, until a passing traveller mentioned a certain Zhongli of the Wangsheng funeral parlour. According to them, he was the man for any kind of Liyuean history, regardless of the era.

You wasted no time hurrying to the funeral parlour with newfound hope. Would this Zhongli know where Morax is? Would he know of you, Guizhong or any other Adepti that were lost to the brutality of the war? Or would he send you away, accusing you of insanity or espionage?

You didn't know, and frankly, you didn't care. When you arrive at the parlour, you're met by a young woman who greets you with a melancholy smile. "How may I help you?"

"I was hoping to speak with a Mr Zhongli? If that's possible, that is."

The woman's expression changes, relaxing from its state of melancholy. "Of course. I can get him for you. Feel free to take a seat."

The seconds seem to drag by as you sit and wait for this man to arrive. Is this yet another dead end? Your mind begins to wander before the woman returns, asking you to follow her to his office. She seems slightly surprised by the words coming out of her mouth—admitting that this isn't something the man often does. The walk to his office is almost stifling. You're silent, your heart pounding helplessly in your chest as you walk.

The woman opens a heavy mahogany door, smiling encouragingly at you as you walk in.

The man before you nods at the woman before turning his attention to you, and you're surprised by his reaction. Years of analysing Morax's stoic face have taught you to pick up on micro reactions like the one Zhongli displays as he looks at you.

His eyes soften as he stands up, bracing himself on the desk as he rises. "I'm afraid I didn't catch your name," he says slowly. You tell him your name, and he chuckles lightly to himself. Of course, you'd find him. Or course you would. You look the same as the day you fell asleep, your eyes wide and excited, a gentle smile playing on your lips despite the absurdity of the situation you find yourself in. He extends his hand to you, and you shake it firmly, muttering the necessary pleasantries.

Zhongli can't believe it. You're real, not a figment of his desperate imagination. You're real, and perfect, and standing right in front of him on your own two feet. Do you know who he is? Is this some cruel joke Celestia is playing on him as punishment for going through with the Fatui's plan? His eyes are familiar to you—they shine with gold as you stare at him, your mind trying to grasp where you remember him from.

"How can I help you?" Zhongli asks. He can't bear to look away from you, the one he's loved since before he could quantify the feeling. The one who listened to him with such care and kindness. The one who made the millennia of duties and solitude worth it. It's you. You've returned to him. And regardless of whether you remember him or not, he swears that he'll express his love for you. He won't make the same mistake twice.

taglist: @ainescribe

#zhongli #zhongli genshin impact #zhongli fluff #zhongli angst #zhongli fanfic #genshin fluff #genshin impact #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin impact angst #genshin impact fluff #zhongli x reader #zhongli x you #genshin x reader #genshin x you

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zepskies · 4 months

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Hi!! Fanfic question here! So in Break Me Down, were you inspired by anything in particular that made you set a portion of the story in SB’s compound? I always thought that was an interesting choice as that setting felt like it was its own character and was pivotal for their relationship to develop. The isolation setting has always been a favorite of mine to get into character development and was curious what made you want to go there for this first half of the story? Apologies in advance for the nerdy writing question 😂

Hey, lovely friend!!

Omg I love it, please don't apologize. Nerdy writing questions are my favorites -- especially for Break Me Down! 💚💚

And your observations are so very interesting (and accurate)!!

I knew making South America the main setting was a bit risky in a sense. It takes readers out of the canon setting of New York, but I wanted a home base for Soldier Boy/Ben, assuming he defeated Homelander and was able to escape the U.S. -- a place for him to regroup, build himself back up, and do whatever he wanted, really.

And I knew I wanted a place where Ben and the reader would essentially be trapped together, like you said, isolated away from the rest of the Boys, thereby forced to either bond or kill each other. 😂 (That's also the reason I set the mansion on a cliffside/waterfall.)

Ben going South America seemed right, drawing narrative lines back to Nicaragua (sort of), where it all went to shit for him. I thought of Rio and Medellin being party destinations for a lot of celebrities, and that this guy would definitely be the type to have a party mansion back in his hay day. Like the Rat pack used to vacation in Cuba back in the '50s and '60s.

I listened to a lot of Frank Sinatra to get into Ben's headspace ("My Way" for instance lol), Tony Bennett, Mel Torme's "You're Getting to Be a Habit With Me," and of course, "If I Didn't Care." I also had scenes from Casablanca, with how they meet in the Prologue/Part 2 in my head, for sure.

Putting Ben and the reader in that first Spanish-style mansion also gave me the chance to explore both his character and the reader as individuals. How Ben felt as empty as that mansion, and the gradual nature of him realizing that.

And how the reader explores the house the same way she tries to figure out what makes him tick.

She also discovers places like the garden, where she finds comfort and peace; the same way she starts to find comfort in Ben, the more she risks confiding in him. They find common ground in the kitchen, often the center of a home, even if this house isn't a home for either of them...

Now that I think about it, I really found so much of them (and the side characters around them) in that house. So thank you so much for this question!! It really made me think. I hope I wasn't too long-winded though. 😂💕💕

#ask me stuff #lovely mutuals #break me down questions #feel free to ask me story or writing questions!#BMD verse #soldier boy #break me down #soldier boy x reader #the boys #soldier boy x female reader #soldier boy x you #soldier boy/ben #zepskies answers

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midnightrings · 5 months

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Still trying to collect my thoughts after watching the final episode, but here’s some stuff I’ve been thinking about while watching it.

(spoilers, obviously)

I really, really loved Hawk and Tim’s dynamic in the 50s scenes (and 80s scenes too, of course, but we’ll get to that). I feel like this was also a point in their lives where there was at least a slight chance that they could’ve made it work – until Hawk screwed it up again. They’ve both clearly grown (especially Tim), their relationship appears quite well-balanced and there wasn’t that much baggage between them yet.

Looks like they kept a good amount from the book. Hawk did report Tim, preventing him from getting his dream job as well as barring him from government work altogether. Similar to what I suspected, Lucy was pregnant and Hawk realized that he needed Tim out of his life. It was overall awful but not as bad as I expected – though maybe only because I already knew it would happen.

It’s heartbreaking how Tim has realized time and time again that he needs to let Hawk go – including writing that letter to him, which I guess Hawk never found out about. Tim even told him that there were no expectations on his part, yet Hawk desperately wanted him in his life, only to push him away in the most horrible way shortly after it.

At least Tim did know the truth and, surprisingly, Hawk let him know himself (through Mary). I really thought Tim would find out about it sometime before ’86. It makes a lot of sense though, considering the scene of Tim in the hospital, watching baby Jackson. Tim clearly realized himself that he doesn’t have a place in Hawk’s life. This explains why Tim was constantly urging Hawk to be there for his family, but also why he wasn’t as hostile towards Hawk as he should have been. I mean, there was definitely some resentment on Tim’s part after ’57, but it wasn’t as big as I expected it to be after Hawk’s betrayal – which is why I always assumed Tim didn’t know the truth. But while Tim might have felt betrayed by Hawk’s actions, he probably did understand his reasoning in the end. Which makes it even sadder, because Hawk could have easily talked to him – perhaps Tim would’ve left by himself, realizing that working together would not end well for either of them.

Now, the 80s … I really love how we finally saw more affection between Hawk and Tim. I got teary eyed (while simultaneously having the biggest smile on my face) when Hawk lay down next to him in the hospital bed – this was so sweet and I was hoping for a moment like this. As I said before, I don’t mind that Hawk never told Tim that he loved him – even though I’ve been hoping it would happen at some point. But I feel like there wasn’t a point where a love declaration like this would have fit in, and Hawk kissing Tim publicly was a way better confession of his feelings than any “I love you” could have been. Tim was clearly at peace with himself, and I also believe that he knew that Hawk loved him – which is the only thing that matters in the end.

I guess that Tim’s “wrenching decision” really was a red herring of sorts. Love that they had him fight until the end, and also that we never really saw his death. We all knew that he would die, and letting the audience know through the AIDS quilt and Hawk telling his daughter that he loved Tim was perfect.

Also, Jerome? My sweet baby … that scene between him and Marcus in the gym made me bawl my eyes out. “You’re innocent” – “I’m innocent” … kill me now please.

Also, I’m so glad that I was right about Lucy leaving Hawk. She deserves to find happiness.

Hawk’s storyline was definitely something I was looking forward to the most (and I could probably write entire essays about his character). But I like that they still have him trying to protect his family, ready to leave if Lucy wanted him to. It just makes more sense for his character than to have him suddenly blindly choose Tim. At the same time, he did everything he could for Tim. I never expected Hawk to come out, but I love how he clearly found comfort within his love for Tim – getting him into that gala, confronting that guy (forgot his name, I think it was Dave?), kissing Tim publicly and confessing his love for Tim to his daughter. It was all a bit too late, but also not really – Hawk making the decision to fly to San Francisco and to then stay with Tim definitely helped him grow for the better. He lost everything in the end, but maybe he can finally find peace as well. Perhaps it even needed Tim’s death for Hawk to come to terms with his love for Tim. It’s sad but their story was always meant to end this way.

I’ll probably make a million posts about this show – I have so many thoughts and can’t wait to rewatch it all.

#fellow travelers #i need some time to process this episode but damn that show is amazing #can't wait to overanalyze every second of it!#meta

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phenomenalgirl9 · 1 year

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Jeon Jungkook x Reader: Dirty (🔞Minors DNI🚫)

A/n: 🔞Minors DNI🚫 mention of explicit stuff. I wrote the whole thing in one go. Literally poured my feelings out. Lol, its my first time writing such smut. So, enjoy! P.s: This is not read over.

Summary: It's your 3rd Year Anniversary and your boyfriend has a surprise planned.

----------------------------------------------------

Jungkook remembers very well how he had once heard you talk about liking 50 shades, and he knew, what he wanted to do, for your 3rd Anniversary. Well, it was tomorrow, but he planned on giving you the best treatment from tonight. He looked at the clock and he knew you were about to arrive any moment now. He quickly rechecked everything to make sure everything was in place. To say he was excited was an understatement.

Soon the sound of the door opening was heard and you came in. You met with your bunny of a boyfriend who immediately attached himself to you.

"Come wash your hands and sit, the food will get cold. Change later" he instructed and you complied.

"Wow. Someone went all in" you said with the biggest smile.

"It's just the start" he said with a wink. But as he always flirted with you, you didn't mind much.

Soon the room was filled with the smell of your (favourite food) and you tasted it to find it was delicious. You praised him, as he ate with you followed by your favourite dessert, from this certain place you liked. This was really thoughtful of Jungkook and you really appreciated it.

Then he came up behind you with a blind fold and whispered "The night has just started" by your ears sending chills down your spine. He guided you to what you assumed was your room as you soon felt him push you onto the soft surface of the bed. Suddenly you felt him tug on one of your arm and then the other and then it dawned at you. You were tied to the bed and you could not move. Right that moment he opened you blind fold.

"Hey babe" he said coming painfully close to your lips, as he came closer to the point where you breaths mingled with each other's becoming one. Yes a bit closer! And you tried to lean in when he pulled away with a smirk. As he reached for you neck and instantly attached his lips there. "Ughh" you moaned as he left marks after marks on your neck. He kissed all over your jaws and at the corner of your mouth but not where you wanted his lips to be. He then pulled away completely.

He slowly started moving, well moving his hips to some imaginary beat and thrusting just the way you liked. You tried to move but it was useless. Jungkook slowly started unbuttoning the dress shirt that he wore. He was painfully slow and with the sway of his hips you could see his half hard member underneath the fabric. Damn, the bunny was half excited just seeing you tied up.

Finally he was at the last buttons when he unbuckled his pants and dropped it, leaving him in just boxers. When he came to you, sitting over you feeling you up as he literally tore off the fabric of your shirt.

"Ah Jungkook!" You tried to say, but found his fingers in your lips "sssshh" he said and the look in his eyes told you dare not mess with him right now. As the shirt was taken off, your boobs with your bra came to vision and you noticed how the boy's eyes turned darker. He grabbed your hips and dipped his head over your chest giving you multiple hickies until he heard you moan and knew your sweet spot and concentrated on that giving it a nice hickey that you knew would bruise.

He moved his tongue along your jaw getting a "fuck!" from you until he roughly crashed his lips to yours. He knew he was in control so when he tried to enter his tongue into your mouth and you didn't he gave a hard squeeze to your ass that led for you to gasp giving him the proper chance to enter your mouth and explore every corner of it. He bit your lower lip as he pulled away and you were left in a daze.

He then pulled down your lowers, slowly and discarded it towards a corner. He then sharply pulled your legs so that you're now lying on the bed with your arms tied. Be climbed over you and tore off your bra in one swift motion. "God" you exclaimed.

"Don't say that baby there'll be nothing holy tonight" he almost growled. He looked at your boobs and the look he gave showed how much he loved you all over. You would never get over that look which says all he wants is just right there, in you. He immediately attached his lip to your right nipple, nibbling and sucking at it, oh how you wanted to grab his hair right now. The way he used his hand to assault the other just left you in an oozzing and squirming mess.

"Ah Babe" you moaned. As he changed to now suck on the other boob and assault this one. He pinched and flicked your hard nipple and you squealed. He liked the sound of that. His hand then traveled down to your panties and it wouldn't need an expert to know that it was wasted and wet with your juices. He put some pressure over your covered clit while still sucking on your boob. Poor you, all you could do was try to free your arms which was of no use. "Aaah Jungkookie~" you whined.

"Yes baby?" He asked looking at you in the yes.

"Fuck me, please." You asked

"Oh Baby I will. But, all in good time" he said and went to kiss the area between your boobs and came down leaving kisses and occasional bites on your stomach as he blew into your belly button causing your body to jerk as he gave an evil smirk as you closed your legs and thighs tighter.

He finally took off your panties, and went back to kiss you on the mouth. An open-mouthed kiss. It told you how much he wanted, needed and craved you. "Look at you all wet and punny. Tell me who it's for?" He demanded looking at you.

"You! It's only for you, Jungkookie" you said and he opened your legs wide as he dived in to kiss your inner thighs, relishing the skin, every time coming achingly close to your core but never touching it. You tried to throw your legs in frustration but he was too strong.

"Stop teasing me!" You whined and he immediately latched his mouth to your core. Giving straight licks from up to down as you moaned his name, again and again as that was all you could think of at that moment. "Jungkook"

He kept licking and sucking at your clit vigorously, and he then entered two fingers inside you. "Ah" you squealed, toes already curling as to grip the head board of the bed to anchor yourself. What he did to you just left you in a moaning mess, brain in a haze.

"Ah ah, Jungkook" you moaned and he knew. You could feel the knot inside your stomach growing and growing "Yes Jungkookie! Yess" you said and finally it all broke as you cursed "fuck!" And came undone on his tongue. You saw him lap up all your juices and lick you up.

He then did his favourite part, kiss you on the mouth right after so you can have the lingering taste of yourself on his tongue. You could barely catch your breath when you felt him lined at your entrance, as he teased it. Getting an incoherent whine, as he just shoved the full thing inside you and you jolted and gasped.

"Ah Y/n, baby" he groaned. And he started moving, starting slowly but with an increasing pace hitching both his and your breath. You held yours and bit your lip as you found him ram into your hole. He consecutively opened your hands in one pull as he said "Don't silence that pretty mouth of yours, I swear I won't stop until all our neighbours know who makes you feel this good"

You finally have your arms open and you pulled him down with his hair to kiss him roughly. As he again threw you back and pulled out. He turned you around in one swift move and pulled you up, entering you from behind. As he pinned you to him, squeezing you boobs that were almost sore.

"Ju-jung-" you tried to make words but it was difficult as you had your boyfriend thump into you mercilessly, fucking your brains out.

"I know baby, me too" he said and bit your shoulder and he groaned when you clenched around him.

And you couldn't hold it any longer you came again letting out everything in you and you'd certainly fall if it wasn't Jungkook who was holding you, who also then groaned "Fuck! Y/n" and came painting your insides, mentally thanking god that you were on birth control as you each rode through your high. And he laid you and calmed both of you down.

He then lied down, face to face with you, "Happy Anniversary my heart" he said.

"Happy Anniversary my Jungkookie" you said holding his face in your hands as he smiled a bright bunny smile. He then got up to clean your and his intimate area with tissues, discarding them and finally holding you close as the two of you had a good night's sleep.

----------------------------------------------------

Other Works

Thank you for reading

Taglist: @jung-nika-hoseok @bbl32 @cherryblossom-2004

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walviemort · 1 year

Photo

true love grows

[A/N: just a brief little idea for Captain Charming Friday I had that @sancocnutclub made me run with. enjoy!]

Emma and Killian had always known parenthood would be an adventure. They just hadn’t expected it to go this way once they were, well, expecting. Even several months later, Emma laughed to think of that conversation with her mom that was just the start of their world turning on its head.

They’d met for lunch and been discussing their hopes of adding to their families—though in very little detail, for Emma’s sake.

“I’m a little nervous to be pregnant again,” she’d admitted. “But I know it’ll be worth it.”

“Well, there’s always the chance it’s not you,” Snow offered in a helpful tone, but it just left Emma confused.

“Uh, why wouldn’t it be me?” she asked. “Who else would it be?”

“Oh no—you don’t know,” Snow said, aghast.

“Know what?”

“When you have True Love, it’s pure chance whether the man or woman carries the baby. Literally 50-50 odds. It’s just luck that I had both you and Neal.” Then she tilted her head, confused. “I thought Killian would have told you that?”

“He would have if he knew, so I’m assuming he doesn’t,” Emma replied. “Oh—oh crap. And he’s been fighting a stomach bug lately.”

Snow just raised her eyebrows, curious.

And now, 30-some weeks later, Killian was the one on the cusp of delivering their baby (a girl!) into the world. He’d been just as shocked as she was at the revelation, having been previously ignorant of that bit of lore, but once he’d accepted it, it had been smooth sailing—though he groaned each day at the increasing size of his waistline as their baby grew.

To add to the joy (or chaos), it turned out that David was also expecting; Emma’s new little sister was due just a couple weeks later. He’d had a few more gripes than Killian but was otherwise taking it well.

Killian had confessed to her around the start of the third trimester that he was glad David had ended up pregnant, too; it made him feel less odd, even if their neighbors didn’t find it out of the ordinary, and he appreciated being able to share the experience with his best friend.

The guys were constantly swapping stories and advice, while also not-so-subtly competing with each other—first to see who lasted longer in their regular clothes (David, ever the fan of forgiving cotton knits), then to see who would end up with the biggest bump (Killian, who carried it all out front). They also had each other to commiserate with when the babies wouldn’t stop kicking them at all hours of the night, or when their cravings got weird, or when they got a glance of their stretch marks in the mirror.

Killian was always a step ahead of David, though, which was good for the prince as a preview of what was to come, but meant that Killian was on his own for a few things—most dramatically, being the first to wear maternity jeans and a belly band, but most painfully, Braxton-Hicks and the day his belly finally dropped. (At least they both had their wives for those moments.)

It was odd for both the girls to be on the other side of being an expectant parent, but having been through it previously made them more adept at helping their husbands. However, they also got some giggles out of certain situations—like when Killian insisted his old tshirts still fit, exposing his belly for all the world to see, or when David attempted to milk the cows into his third trimester. The ladies also insisted on weekly pictures of the boys side-by-side; Snow already had a scrapbook going—because what were the odds of them ever being in this situation again?

So here they were—at 38 weeks for Killian and 36 for David—posing for their photos; Killian was feeling tired and over it, though looking forward to the end result, while David was still feeling great (of which Killian was both jealous and incapable of comprehending).

Killian waddled over to their sofa and collapsed on it once they were done, legs spread to let his belly rest between them, letting out a long sigh and resting his hand on the apex of his generous bump as he felt his daughter move within.

“That bad, huh?” David asked as he sat (much more gracefully) next to him; his belly still sait fairly high on his frame, but was beginning to drift lower.

“Aye,” Killian told him. “Give it a couple weeks and you’ll know.”

“I dunno,” David countered. “Even at 40 weeks, I’m not sure I’ll be that big—hey!” He was promptly punched in the arm.

“Boys? Stop it,” Snow scolded from the kitchen.

“Yeah, stop it,” Killian parroted, then stuck out his tongue.

David rolled his eyes. “Must be why that kid is so big—she’s already full of sass.”

He promptly got hit again, but then hissed with a different kind of pain and his hands rushed to his belly.

“I swear, if you go into labor before me…” Killian grumbled.

David relaxed a minute later. “No, it was a practice one,” he waved off. “There’s no way you’ll outlast me, not at that size.”

(Emma was the one to smack him upside the head that time.)

(However, he was right, but only just: it was three more hormonal weeks before Killian finally went into labor—only a few hours before David did, because why wouldn’t that happen in Storybrooke?

Both delivered healthy daughters—Alice Margaret Jones and Ruth Hope Nolan—in the wee early hours of the morning. And they eventually discovered the other perk of being pregnant at the same time: raising their babies together.)

-----------------------------------------------------

source: x x

thank you so much for reading! tagging a few: @wyntereyez @jennjenn615 @superadam54 @ashley-knightingale @justsomewhump @teamhook @mathiaskejseren @88infinity88

#captain charming friday #mpreg #killian mpreg #cs f #snowing ff #captain charming ff #my ff #my manip

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twicecussed-crosshair · 1 year

Text

Bad Batch .x. Artist S/O HC’s

So, this was spontaneously requested by @PocketKaleesh

Let’s see where I can take these! A little bonus added for their reactions to being the unknowing volunteer/muse of the drawn piece! Since these are for Shipping Purposes, I may add Omega onto another post, all together. I don’t want to give off the wrong message at all.

Hunter

Hunter looks like the guy who wants to be around Y/N when his rebellious schedule isn’t in the way of socializing. Watching his S/O draw seems like it’s a nice bout of serotonin for the stressed Batcher’.

Sketching on traditional parchment (paper) seems to be easier than paints or heavy alcohol-based products for him to be around. He enjoys watching the strategic steps and measures it takes to build a figure from a stick frame, and then move on to the building of body mass and all of the other added features. He sometimes falls asleep around Y/N when he’s deeply focused on the relaxed and easy-going vibes Y/N gives off.

+Bonus: Hunter finds it comforting and all, until he realizes you are referencing his face and drawing very familiar features onto the poised skeleton/frame. He’s especially flustered that he’s posed in a very gallant and proud posture. The chiseled muscles and poise were extremely flattering to him. He was blushing and flustered by the end of S/O’s drawing session.

Wrecker

Oh boy when he does find out Y/N is an artist. He’d work every way, each day even, that he can to assist when Y/N say you need inspiration or a muse or an exercise! He’d even volunteer for it! Of course, he’d even ask if Y/N would draw Lula for him now and again.

Offer him a chance to draw with Y/N! Y/N would have a drawing buddy every second of every drawing session! Even if his talents weren’t the best (his words), Surely, Y/N would praise him to boost his morale.

+Bonus: Wrecker would be taken aback for sure! He’d be excited and very enthused, even, but then again, he may also have a few occasions where he’s self-conscious about his overall appearance. Rest assured, Y/N would always be very loving and very nurturing when he needed a hug. Always giving him the best confidence boost-and art collective for his viewing, of course!

Tech

He is surprised to see that Y/N has a very eclectic talent in drawing from memory and even without a reference at times! Of course, he’d want to express the logistics behind it and the probability of where Y/N obtained the talent. He’s always mesmerized, and when he isn’t face deep in his holopad or research, he’s staring-while attempting to be inconspicuous-at your paper or holopad.

He always has moments where some of his comments here and there focus on what he guesses Y/N is drawing. It quickly becomes a normal game when the sketching starts. He’s sometimes 50/50 on guessing right, then again, how can he assume when some last-minute alterations change the art completely!

+Bonus: Upon sketching the signature goggles on the drawing, he knew upon immediate recognition that it was him that was the focal point of that drawing session. Boy did he feel special!... and especially flustered! He was very flattered and smiled a little more than usual that day, as a result. Most of them were reserved for Y/N, of course.

Echo

Echo enjoys a quiet buddy to sit next to on long shuttle rides and hyperspace jumps. He scoots a little bit closer with every amount of extra detail added. His expression and eyes never waver... that is until Y/N looks up from the drawing and notices he’s focused intently on the drawing in question. His flustered reaction seems adorable.

He seems as though he’d give pretty good advice about softer critiques. Since his brother, Fives, was quite artistically talented, who better to give a nice and heartfelt compliment or encouraging critique. His vibes are quite soft and kind.

+Bonus: Much like Wrecker, Echo may-at first-seem a little taken aback by the fact Y/N chose to draw him out of the other Batchers’. He doesn’t outwardly ask, but his expression is a tell-all. Kind reassurance and confidence boosts coated in gentle, sweet reminders would always be the best medicine. (Even drawing him with or a piece of just Fives...that’s another story to unfold </3)

Crosshair (Why not? ,,ԾㅂԾ,,)

Of course, as stoic as he may be 99% of the time, he would be considerably chill in Y/N’s presence especially since your focus is more so on the drawing than being loud or disruptive. He probably enjoys watching the process of some pieces-much like Hunter-but won’t admit it openly, either.

He seems like he’d offer to purchase sketch pads or some other supplies Y/N may need, especially if short of a few credits. It’s the least he could do for someone with a very dear passion. Plus, if Y/N offered to get him toothpicks on supply runs every so often, of course he’d oblige and pay back in kind.

+Bonus: He would be flustered and a little touchy about it. He seems like the kind of guy who gets a little passive aggressive about some flirty gestures. Even if they weren’t how was he supposed to know? He’d be, however, very flattered. Over time, his gratitude would be apparent, as he would do what he could to express his thanks... especially if he were drawn in a bad*$$ sniping pose and all.

#The Bad Batch #headcanons #clone force 99 #the bad batch x reader #echo #tech #Crosshair #Hunter #Wrecker #crosshair my beloved #pocketkaleesh

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sorcerous-caress · 5 months

Note

How does Sol get along with their companions/ what do the companions think about them? 👀 If you don’t mind talking about it!

I re-attach wings to angels each time someone asks me about Sol <3 don't worry about the abundance of wingless angels it's unrelated.

This was written assuming Sol is not Tav and is just another companion. Also it's...mostly negtive, Sol isn't easy to get along with, and they don't make it easy for others to like them.

Sol with the companions

Astarion

Act 1: they start indifferent to him. They're not the brightest when it comes to people lying, so his horrible acting and shady backstory flies over their head. During the vampire reveal, they try to pretend that they knew all along. You can pass an insight dice check of 5 to very easily tell they didn't know shit.

The only thing they bond over is being vain. He mentions not seeing his own reflection and they're concerned about how he does his eyebrows then. He fully agrees that it is a struggle and don't get him started on the mess that is styling his own hair.

He'd probably approve of the fact they sacrifice defence and movement for beauty, the whole pain is beauty thing. Honestly both of them are bad influences on each others and just enablers when it comes to bad habits.

I mean he could try to talk them into letting him bite them, if he convinced them that it'd make their skin clearer, it's a 50/50 chance if it'd work or he ends up microwaved.

Act 2: You know how people in cults don't realise they're in one? Sol didn't think their upbringing was that bad or what their family did was that extreme until Astarion started talking about what Cazador did to him and how he loathes him for it, how much he wants revenge. It made Sol think if they too should be seeking revenge, if they too should be loathinh their family. They go from indifferent to curious.

Act 3: they haven't made up their own mind on whether it's a good idea for him to seize the power from Cazador or not. By that point they also need to make a similar choice about their magic, but instead of remaining the way the are like Astarion, they need to pick between losing it all or taking it all. They've grown fond of him by that point as a friend, he points out when someone is clearly lying or manipulating them and they appreciate that. Likewise they are always blunt to him with no ulterior motives.

Shadowheart

Act 1: Sol would be annoyed by the fact she's keeping secrets, and I can see Shadowheart disliking them because of it, and because of their clear appreciation of Lae'zel. Both of them unpolitely avoid each other, a few jabs every now and then, a few trashy comments thrown during party chatter, but nothing major, really. At the end of the day, it's annoyance and not hate.

Act 2: By that point when her and Lae'zel made amends, Sol slowly grows closer to Shadowheart as well. They still do their jabbing and nickpicking each other's flaws but it's more in good humour by now, mean banter is just Sol's way of being playful or showing affectionate and Shadowheart is a champion at it. During her Dame Aylin choice, they say it's best to let Shadowheart decide her own fate and not interfer, both Tav and Shar.

Act 3: When the hard truth downs on them that Shadowheart wasn't keeping secrets but had her memory fully wiped, they find themselves actually feeling guilty for their actions at the start. Guilt is something Sol rarely does ever feel. It's new, raw, and all-consuming, and they can't deal with it. If you have them romanced they'd confide in you with it, maybe you can go tell it to Shadowheart on your own and they'll get annoyed that you did that without their permission, but also thank you for doing it for them.

Gale

Act 1: full on bullying. They absolutely see him as a joke. Especially the Mystra part oh they never shut up about it and how stupid it was of him to try and appease a god back into a relationship, how naive he is for thinking gods ever see mortals as anything more than toys to play with and discard. Digs at him being a wizard, at how he is just borrowing magic while they were born with it, how his view is so narrow-minded. The thing about their "bullying" is that half of the criticism against him is valid and actually make sense, which makes Gale can't stand them because of it, he knows some of their words are right even when the rest is exaggerated bullshit.

Act 2: If you romance him, then Sol tells you to reconsider, that jumping into a relationship with someone who was obsessed with their ex is never a good idea. That Gale isn't who he seems to be, they might be bad at telling lairs apart but there are some things a person can't hide. Then the news from Elminster comes, and they're speechless when Gale actually seems on board to sacrifice his life. To blow himself up for something as stupid as the future of the world or a goddess. They think it's absolutely the dumbest idea he has ever had, and if he thinks their opinion of him was low before, then it just got even lower if he actually goes on with this plan. They tell you that you should never let that happen, they themselves don't know why they feel so strongly about this when they wouldn't have cared if he died in that portal before.

Act 3: they finally know why. They want him to die for himself, not die for someone else, not die for forgiveness. He should get a normal stupid death like all wizards do, he should blow himself up in a silly experiment or something not go on a suicide mission for a goddess who couldn't bother to get off her own ass to see him or a world that doesn't even know his name. They have a serious talk with him if he somehow can siphon their own magic to feed his orb. If you ask if that means they'll lose their magic, then they just stay silent. They aren't surprise when he becomes obsessed with the crown of Karsus. They claim they predicted it happening eventually, be it the crown or another magical artifact. You can pass an insight check to find out they're telling the truth.

Lae'zel

Act 1: probably the only companion they actually liked from the start. There is something about her so familiar. Her sharp mean words feel like home, and her bluntness is a breath of fresh air. They are absolutely vibing with her through the whole journey, keep introducing her to Faerun concepts and human traditions. Make a joke about how they're a descendent of a red dragon, and she's a githyanki, so this must be fate.

Act 2: they didn't think they could respect her even more, and yet when she stood in front of Vlaakith and faced her, her courage almost stunned them. They genuinely admire her, start looking up to her in a way they deem embarrassing to admit, and try to hide it. Start hinting at how they'd love her as a friend.

Act 3: The way she manages her emotions so well and doesn't hide from them but faces them instead is something they thought was impossible to do. How can she do it so easily? Why did no one ever teach them this? How can she accept her new fate just like that when everyone in camp knew how dedicated she was to her cause and peoppe? And how did she manage to find a new cause to fight for do it quickly? Lae'zel to them is the kind of hero you read about in history books. She is the closest thing they'll ever have to a role model. What started as an easy friendship because Sol felt at home around "rude" people quickly became Sol's first ever actual genuine friendship. In a way...maybe it was Lae'zel's too.

At the end of the game, they're very against the idea of Lae'zel turning into a mindflayer if it's brought up. If you're playing Lae'zel origin, then they'd offer themselves instead, something they'd never do for the others or Tav. For their only and first ever friend, they're willing to give up their life.

Wyll

Act 1: is a bit suspicious at the fact he is too charming and nice, at least Astarion has his very clear personality flaws which made his lie fly over their head. But with Wyll he feels too true to be good and they tell him that which he brushes off with a laugh. Then the whole Mizora fiasco is discovered and they're like "Ha, I knew it!"

Act 2: they thought he'd be delighted to her about his father being imprisoned, it means the power will rightfully be his now, right? So why is he putting so much effort into searching for a parent who abandoned him, why does he forgive his father and still care? They don't understand Wyll.

Despite the three of them being humans, Wyll and Gale are the two companions Sol would never understand no matter how much they try. If anything Sol felt left out, as if none of them could relate to one another's struggles. Being human clearly was never enough to build a bond between them.

Act 3: They see the reunion between Wyll and his father and bitterness fills their mouth, realising their own family wouldn't have gone through the same effort. Jealousy, envy at Wyll having something they desperately wanted. Sol is clearly more powerful than him wasn't it for his pact with a devil so why should they feel inferior to him? They shouldn't...but he has so many friends, so many fans and he seems...content, happy.

How dare he be happy when he is this weak, how dare he forgive his father for casting him out, how dare he learn from his past mistakes and aim to better himself rather into crumble into self loathing for being a fraud. Wyll is everything Sol wasn't and couldn't be. Weak and happy.

Karlach

Act 1: she doesn't seem surprised by their attitude but she never banters back with them, they're aren't sure what to make of it. Her skin is thicker than they expected, probably because nothing Sol could ever say or do hasn't been said and done by the devils in hell in a way that's ten times as hurtful. Karlach went through a lot and Sol is barely a scratch on her surface. But what really takes them back is the fact she is still kind to them? It fully weirds them out how nice she is to them, how one time she asked if their draconic lineage gave them enough fire resistance to hug her. Sol didn't know what to say, they just shook their head. If anything they too can't remember the last time they were hugged, the last time someone even touched them in a non threatening way.

Act 2: when her engine gets fixed, Sol curiously asked her if hugging was as much of a disappointment as they knew it would be for her. Instead she hugged them and they remained speechless for the rest of the day. Couldn't even pretend it didn't effect them, hugs are actually nice, they found out.

Act 3: she calls them her friend and Sol wonders how the fuck did they get to that point? Even their morality is as grey as their a rainstorm but Karlach somehow looked past that, past their insults, past their fits of jealousy and past their unstable emotions and saw a person. Sol never considered her a friend so why did she? It can't be that easy to make a friend, yes they can't be the one in the wrong no. Karlach is definitely the one in the wrong here, she should raise her standards for friends and not just throw the word around, she might give someone the wrong idea.

She's dying, they watch her struggling against the flames of her heart and they wonder if this is the same fate awaiting them. If this is why their training was so brutal, why their family was so stern, why their life was so ruthless. Just so they can live? So they remain alive and not succumb to a death like Karlach's.

So why did she seem happy. Why did world life seem so much more colorful than Sol's. Why did she go out with a smile as they remained alive but miserable. For once Sol wonders maybe if the dragon heart inside their chest didn't belong to them, wonders if their own heart was too stolen from them before birth. They feel like they failed her as a friend, like they never appreciated her enough. That by the time they were ready to call her a friend, she was already gone. Left back to the hells or left the world of the living.

By the act 3, like the other companions they soften up and start considering friendship. Start paying them actual compliment and stand by them

Tell me if you want me to do Halsin and Minthara too because this was really fun <3 thanks so much for letting me gush about my unlovable little fireball.

#♡sol #♡mytavs

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qqueenofhades · 2 years

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I feel more and more like this portrayal of extreme violence against women and also the idea that people in the middle ages were dumb/didn't know what they were doing (of which imo horrific childbirth gore is an example--I know it happened but also it still does!) is very much in line with the idea that history is an always linear progression upwards (dumb to smart, no human rights to many of them you get the drill) so in a way these "realistic" depictions make sense to most people probably because they assume that whatever is happening to women now, it must have been Worse for them back then, and because they're aware women didn't have too many rights until recently (a d even that is debatable) that has only ever been worse in the past too unless they were Joan of Arc

And this is why primary and secondary school history education needs a complete overhaul

*same anon, I just wanted to add to the linear history thing real quick. It also writes off the men as idiots who don't know morals, and humanity in general as stupid, rather than a complex evolved system of thinking which simply is different from contemporary white western civilisation. It just... Feels a lot like the way colonialists looked at the people they called savages.

I mean, yeah. I've written (and ranted) extensively about all of this in the past (as I said, this whole conversation is like being dead-fish-slapped in the face with approximately-2014 Tumblr). I have too many posts on this subject to possibly link and/or remember them all, but my medieval history and women in history tags both come to mind as places where some of that stuff can be found.

Also, either the makers of HOTD or the people writing the Hollywood Reporter article actually used the overturn of Roe v. Wade as a "reason" for it being "important" for the show to depict the "fact!!!" that premodern women "often" died in childbirth (one of the showrunners even came out with some imaginary-but-weirdly-specific statistic about it being a "50-50 chance" for a woman to survive giving birth. Thanks for that, Noted Medieval History Expert, Guy Who Makes Television Shows For HBO!) And like... does any woman in America right now think that what they really need is some mediocre-white-man entertainment executive making a high-budget infomercial about why childbirth is dangerous? Like they suddenly discovered that fact three seconds ago and are like ZOMGZ MORE PEOPLE SHOULD KNOW THIS? When the possibility of women dying in preventable ways due to pregnancy complications has once more become a grim reality, like... we also really need to see this in entertainment now? Because something something realism!!!?

Either way, the overturn of Roe alone should put paid to any serious attempt to argue that things have only gotten "better" for women throughout history, have never gotten worse, and that "human rights" only proceed forward on a chronologically based idea of liberal morality. If the "progress" of history is real, why do we have a literal fascist movement in America that is mouthing all the old and supposedly discredited tenets of fascist thought? Why is that happening again, if we learned back in the 1940s that racist nationalist fascism was bad, fought a pretty major war over it, and then supposedly moved past it for good? Etc etc. People create social attitudes and legal rules according to what they find useful at the time and in response to their needs and fears. As I have said, they also don't live long enough to have any real historical memory or sense of just repeating what has been done in the past, because a) they don't learn history, b) they don't believe it, and c) it hasn't happened to them, they treat history as only the parts of it that they like and which support their point of view, and therefore just go around and around in circles and never actually learn their lesson. Blah.

Anyway, conservatives and the alt-right like the idea that there was supposedly a time when women "knew their place" and weren't treated like people and had no rights and only existed to please their menfolk and Serve God, because that lends "weight" to their attempt to do the exact same thing right now. Liberals like the idea that the Past Was Always Bad For Women because it implies that modern liberalism happily solved that problem and provides them with endless ways to disparagingly call the fascists "medieval," which isn't helpful either and distracts from how modernity has developed and nurtured these toxic ideas for its own purposes. So. Yeah.

#anonymous #ask #history #women in history

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aziraphales-library · 2 years

Note

Hello mods! I'm not sure if I've already sent this ask. Found it in my notes but didn't cross it off, so I'm assuming I never sent it. If I did, you're free to ignore this :)

Hi mods!

Whenever I find a human au fic with queer themes, I go in hoping for something not set in modern era and try not to be disappointed every time I'm mistaken. So, do you know of any fic set in the past (could be 1700s, could be 1950s, hell could even be the 80s. Don't mind just as long as it's not set in the 21st century or ancient times) in which A&C are queer in some way and have to deal, at least a bit, with the consequences of being that in that time? Could be gay, trans, or whatever. I just really want to read about them being queer in a world against them and finding comfort in each other. So a happy or at least hopeful ending would be appreciated too.

Thanks in advance! The work you guys do is fantastic <3

Hello! Try the Historical AUmens Collection! There are also tags on AO3 for particular eras like Victorian, Regency, Medieval etc.

Here is an ask with long list of historical recs.

Some more:

Moonlight Serenade (Extended) by TawnyOwl95 [E]

That night the bombers flew out from Tadfield Airbase. They always woke Crowley up, set the dogs barking but tonight they disturbed him long after the night had fallen silent again.

He couldn't sleep until he heard them come back, until he knew if there was a chance Aziraphale was still alive.

Called Up by cassieoh, Liquid_Lyrium [T]

"Bit of a chilly day to go without a jacket," he points out stupidly. He tries not to stare openly at the braces that attractively frame the other man’s chest. Then he remembers his shades are in place, and he feels some tension leave his shoulders.

Fell (terribly ominous name for a pilot, that) goes a little pink in the cheeks, and isn't that something?

"Gave it away," he mumbles under his breath, and it's like a trap door drops out from under Crowley's feet.

Once More, With Feeling by saretton, TawnyOwl95 [E]

1950s. The research continues, but Aziraphale is determined to shake things up.

If only he can find the courage to let Crowley know.

The things one does for science.

All My Heart Is Yours by FeralTuxedo [E]

1847. Aziraphale Fell arrives at Eden Hall to take up his new position as tutor to the young heir. The house is enormous, remote, and its occupants rather strange — but none more so than its master, the ill-mannered but inconveniently handsome Mr Crowley.

Mr Crowley’s gaze lingered on him.

‘Now I see you in broad daylight, I can tell you’re no gentleman.’

Aziraphale bristled. He was wearing his best ensemble, and it was of fine enough quality, if a little rumpled from the luggage.

‘Whereas you certainly look the part, even if your manners suggest otherwise.’

A Victorian human AU loosely inspired by Jane Eyre, but with 50% less angst and 100% less spousal incarceration.

As Time Goes By by teatales [M]

Mr Anthony Crowley was fine with being alone. He had his car and his plants and his career as a travelling salesman, and it was fine. Even with his awful new bosses, he had no plans to quit selling watches anytime soon. What else would he do?

Mrs Aziraphale Ingels had been stuck in Tadfield ever since her husband passed away a year ago. She tried her best not to dwell on how lonely she felt as she filled her days with books and baking while waiting for the inheritance to be finalised. Only then could she consider what she wanted to do with the rest of her life.

A chance meeting, a blossoming friendship, and Aziraphale and Crowley soon find themselves falling in love with the stranger they met only a few months ago. But neither believe the other could ever love them back, and both have things they're terrified to share.

As Time Goes By is a timeless romance set in the 1950s about acceptance, being less alone than you think, and watch-related puns.

~Mod N

#good omens #ineffable husbands #historical #historical au #mod n #human au #adult omens

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englishstrawbie · 2 years

Text

Serendipity (37/?)

Fandom: Station 19, Grey’s Anatomy

Characters: Maya Bishop & Carina DeLuca

Summary: A chance meeting at a bar leads to these two idiots falling in love. Follows canon and fills in the gaps of their relationship that we didn’t get to see on screen.

Note: I merged this chapter with Beyond The Door There’s Peace, which I wrote back in March 2021, just after the episode aired. It’s not a complete copy and paste of that fic, but I didn’t edit as much as I thought I would because I realised that I couldn’t write it any better. If you read that story, I hope it doesn’t detract from this chapter. It’s long and full of grief and emotion, so hang in there!

Also @ AO3.

* * * * * * * * * *

22:50

A thousand moments I had taken for granted, mostly because I assumed there would be a thousand more. - Morgan Matson

She doesn’t notice the walk from the pit to her office. She doesn’t see the familiar halls and the familiar faces that greet her every day at work, it is all a blur. All she knows is that her hand is safe in Maya’s as she leads her through the hospital. If anyone speaks to her along the way, she doesn’t hear it. Her brain is fuzzy and there is a buzzing in her ears that drowns out any thoughts she might have. It hurts her head but she is grateful for it because it stops her from thinking about Andrew, from seeing the fear and pain on his face as they wheeled him out of the trauma room.

It can’t be real, she thinks to herself. Someone is going to wake her up any moment and tell her she is having a nightmare. Because it can’t be real.

Carina is a doctor and, okay, she’s an OBGYN but she has seen her fair share of traumas. This feels different. It is personal, it is her baby brother about to be on that operating table, the victim of a horrific act of violence that she couldn’t stop from happening. They had so many chances to walk away and they didn’t, they kept going, and now Andrew is fighting for his life.

She remembers the day their mama collapsed, how she found her on the floor of the kitchen in her tiny apartment, pale and still, with barely a pulse. She called out for help then too, but no-one had come. She had fumbled for her phone and called for an ambulance, but she already knew it was hopeless, that Mama was gone.

Is she going to lose someone else she loves today?

Her body aches, full of tension, and she feels prickly, like she is on the edge of snapping. She hears Maya tell her to take off her coat but her limbs don’t follow what her brain is telling them to do and she sighs with frustration.

“I’ll do it,” Maya says softly.

She is gentle with her movements as she slips her hands inside the lapels of Carina’s coat and pushes it off her shoulders. She slides it onto the wire coat hanger that hangs on the back of the door. Carina’s sweater follows and she obediently raises her arms so that Maya can pull it over her head. She watches as Maya folds it neatly, knowing that Carina always takes care of her clothes, complaining when she drops hers haphazardly on the floor after a twenty-four hour shift when all she wants to do is fall into bed and sleep.

They don’t talk about the blood stains that have started to dry into the soft cashmere, that will be a bitch to get out.

Maya finds a Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital hoodie in one of the cupboards and Carina slips it on. Her fingers fumble with the zipper and Maya steps in front of her to do it for her.

“Thank you,” Carina says in barely more than a whisper.

Her eyelids feel heavy as the pounding headache gets worse and she squeezes them shut briefly, leaning against the edge of her desk to keep her steady.

“Do you want some Tylenol?” Maya asks.

Carina nods her head. Maya retrieves a half-empty packet from her top drawer and passes them to her. She has to swallow them dry, gulping several times until she can’t feel them stuck in her throat any more.

“What do you need?”

It is not an easy question to answer. She needs for this day not to have happened, she needs for her brother not to be on his way to an operating room right now. There is nothing that Maya can do to make either of these things happen.

“I think… I need to pray.”

She doesn’t go to church much any more, except at Christmas and on her Mama’s birthday, but her belief in God hasn’t wavered. Even with all the grief and loss she has suffered over these last few months, when others might question His plan, she has kept her faith. She needs to believe more than ever that He will make sure that Andrew gets through this – even if she does hate Him a little bit right now for putting her through this again.

“Okay. How about we go and wait in the hospital chapel?”

Carina nods. Before they can leave, there is a knock on the door and they turn to see Ben in the doorway.

“Hey, I just came to see how you’re doing?”

‘How do you think I’m doing?’ Carina wants to snap back at him, to point out how stupid his question is, but she doesn’t. Instead, she says nothing.

She feels Maya slip her hand around hers and squeeze it gently.

“We’re just about to go the chapel,” Maya says. “Are you heading back to the station?”

“No. Gibson’s on his way there now with the aid car, but I was gonna hang around here for a bit,” Ben says. “If that’s okay with you, Captain?”

“Of course,” Maya says. She offers him a small smile. “Thank you – for today, for being there.”

He glances at Carina, perturbed by her silence, then back to Maya. “If there’s anything else you need, just shout.”

With a short nod goodbye, he backs out of the office, closing the door quietly behind him.

“I should be with him,” Carina says suddenly. “Andrea, I… I should be with him.”

It feels wrong that she is not by his side, holding his hand. She doesn’t care what he said, what Owen said, she should be with him. She shouldn’t be here.

She pushes herself away from the desk, but her hand is still in Maya’s and she holds her back.

“Carina…”

“No!”

Her voice grows louder, the fear and frustrations bottled within threatening to spill out. She steals her hand away from Maya.

“They wouldn’t let me go with him. You wouldn’t let me go with him.”

“Babe…”

“And now he’s alone.”

“Hey, hey,” Maya says, placing a hand on each of Carina’s arms. She struggles against her; she doesn’t want to be calm and still, she needs to rage, but Maya doesn’t back down. She gently guides her to face her. “He’s not alone.”

Carina’s eyes point downwards at Maya’s pristine white starched collar, stubbornly refusing to meet her eyes. Maya tucks her fingers under her chin, encouraging her to look up.

“He’s not alone,” she repeats. “Owen is there with him. And I bet that everyone in that OR is someone who knows him and cares about him. Because that’s who he is, he’s someone that people care so much about.” She runs the back of her fingers across Carina’s cheek. “He knows you’re here. He’s not alone.”

“What if he needs me?” Carina says quietly. “What if…”

“Don’t think like that,” Maya interrupts, knowing what she is about to say. “We have to stay positive, right? We have to believe that he’s going to be okay.”

She says it with so much surety that Carina starts to believe it. Her shoulders sag as Maya draws her into her body, wrapping her arms around her. Her arms are warm and comforting, and she leans into the hug, letting Maya support her body weight for a moment. She doesn’t want to fall apart, she needs to stay strong for Andrew – until he is better.

“Come on,” Maya says softly in her ear. “Let’s go to the chapel.”

Carina’s hand is back in the safety of Maya’s as they walk through the hospital. She keeps her head down as they go, avoiding the curious looks and sympathetic glances from her colleagues. Some of them offer kind words of hope and best wishes, and Maya thanks them but doesn’t stop moving.

The chapel is empty when they get there, which isn’t unusual these days because of the lack of visitors during the Covid restrictions. Maya holds the door open and lets Carina walk in first. The room is cold and she shivers, wrapping her arms around her body as if it will do some good. Maya comes up beside her and puts her hand on her back, but it is too soft and she steps away from her, walking up to the candles.

People have been here before them, flames already burning. Carina closes her eyes and prays to God – begs Him – to make sure Andrew is okay. She picks up the box of matches to light her own candle, a gift to God for hearing her, except her hands are shaking and she has to strike it several times before it catches fire. She lights the first candle, then discards the match before it can burn her fingers, taking another out of the box – this time to light a candle for her Mama. Only her hands won’t stop shaking and the match scrapes against the side of the box without catching fire. She keeps trying to no avail, getting more and more frustrated with each stroke.

Over her shoulder, she hears Maya’s phone buzz.

“Warren got called to a four-alarm downtown.”

It irritates her – that someone is trying to call her away, that she bothered to check her phone in the first place.

“Do you have to go?” Carina asks gruffly.

The match in her hand refuses to light and she huffs.

“Carina, I'm not going anywhere,” Maya tells her and she feels relief washing over her. She can’t do this without Maya.

And then Maya is by her side, a hand on her wrist to stop her from striking the match any more.

“Hey, hey.”

Maya takes the match and the box from Carina, leaving her hands empty but still shaking, so she stuffs them into her pockets, clenching them into fists. The match lights up on the first strike and Carina watches as Maya lights a candle.

She wishes Mama was still alive and there to tell her that everything will be okay, to give her reassurance like only a parent can do. They were such a unit when she was younger – Mama, Andrew and her. With Papa’s focus on work so much, and his mood swings becoming unpredictable, the time spent just the three of them are some of her happiest memories.

“Before she died, Mama called us two halves of one whole,” Carina says. Maya looks at her curiously and she smiles. “It loses something in translation. My dad, he thought we were completely different, but my mom knew that we could not breathe without the other.”

“One year, when Dad was too manic to talk sense to, he, um, spent all our Christmas money on stuff he didn't need…” She turns and walks over to the front pew, sitting down. Maya follows, listening to her story. “…but Mom saved up and she surprised us with one gift. A pair of roller skates.”

She can’t help but smile at the memory. They had spent the day moping about the lack of presents and she remembers Mama sitting them down on the couch, persuading them to close their eyes and putting the gift in front of them, waiting with her camera to capture the moment they saw her surprise.

She should find that photo.

“Andrea tried to give them to me, but I put on the left and he put on the right, and we held the other two legs up like flamingos and skated around the house.”

She can still see the way Andrew’s face lit up, can still feel the joy of knowing how much Mama loved them. She can still hear the squeals that echoed around the house as they skated – well, tried to skate. They weren’t very co-ordinated and kept bumping into things. One of Mama’s vases had crashed to the floor, breaking into tiny pieces; but instead of being angry, Mama had tipped her head back and laughed.

Andrew does the same thing when he laughs and he looks just like her. She has always envied him for that.

Her eyes fill with tears again when she thinks about Andrew on the operating table and the fear of losing him washes over her once again.

“Two parts, one whole.”

She joins her palms together and waves them through the air, like Mama used to do, then drops her head into her hands to cry again. Maya slips a hand around her waist and slides in closer, her free hand running over her hair and pulling her closer. Carina rests her head on Maya’s shoulder and burrows her face into her neck. Her sobs fill the room, echoing off the white-washed walls. Her chest heaves, her breath catching in her throat, and she feels Maya gently rubbing her back.

She doesn’t let go until she feels Carina’s body still against her. Even then, she keeps her arm wrapped around her waist as Carina straightens up.

“I’m sorry,” Carina says, drying her cheeks with the sleeve of her hoodie.

“Hey, you’re allowed to be upset,” Maya scolds her lightly. She leans in and presses her lips against Carina’s temple, kissing her softly.

Carina smiles as the gesture. “Thank you. I know today – the inspection – was important to you…”

“You’re more important,” Maya says, cutting her off.

Carina knows what it means to hear Maya say that – a woman who is so focussed on her job, so determined to climb the career ladder, that she won’t let anything get in her way.

“No wonder you’re Andrea’s favourite,” Carina teases her, enjoying the sound of the small laugh that escapes from Maya’s lips. “You’re mine too.”

They lean into one another, resting their foreheads against each other. It is going to be hours before they get an update and Carina already feels exhausted from the waiting. Her mind goes to unspeakable places and she tries so hard to stop it, to put good thoughts into her head, but they are overshadowed by all the bad ones. The pandemic, the losses she has seen – both personally and professionally – have all chipped away at her, knocking her optimism and zeal for life off kilter. She feels a weight bearing down on her, the load only lightened by Maya’s presence.

The minutes tick by slowly. Maya tries to fill the silence sometimes, but Carina barely engages. The only way to get through this is to keep her mind blank, to numb the fear as much as possible. Carina stays in her seat, while Maya paces up and down the pews sometimes, unable to sit still for too long.

Carina finds herself humming at one point, the song she used to sing to Andrea when he was little.

Avrai sorrisi sul tuo viso come ad agosto grilli e stelle…

It is a song that Nonna taught her, that she would sing to Papa when he was a little boy – passed down the generations, she always told Carina that she hoped she would one day sing it to her own children.

“Merda!”

Maya stops her pacing and looks at her. “What?”

“Papa,” Carina says slowly. “I haven’t told Papa yet.”

“Can you imagine Papa's reaction to this right now?” she had asked Andrew earlier that day on the train. She thought it was cute, that they would tell him of their adventure racing around the city. How stupid that was in hindsight. Her stomach flips and she worries for a moment that she is going to throw up. She swallows thickly.

Maya walks across the chapel and sits beside her. “Do you want to call him now?”

“I… don’t know,” Carina says. She looks at Maya with pleading eyes, needing her to make the decision for her.

Maya sees it in her face. “Maybe you should wait until you get an update from Owen?” she suggests. “There’s nothing your dad can do from Italy and he’s only going to worry while he waits for news.”

Carina nods. It makes sense. She can’t cope with her father’s erratic emotions on top of her own right now.

A knock on the door interrupts them and they turn in unison, expecting to see a doctor or nurse and are instead surprised to see a police officer stepping into the chapel. Maya recognises him immediately, despite the black mask on his face.

“Officer Patterson,” she greets him, standing up and putting her own mask on. Beside her, Carina does the same. “Is everything okay?”

He nods. “I wanted to let you know that the suspect, Opal, has been arrested and charged,” he says. “We were also able to identify the man responsible for stabbing your friend.”

“My brother,” Carina points out. “Andrea is my brother.”

Patterson looks sympathetically at her. “We have his name. Opal gave him up pretty quickly when she thought it would do her some good.”

Maya raises her eyebrows. “She’s trying to cut a deal?”

Carina turns rigid, angry at the thought. They both notice the change in her body language and Maya puts a calming hand on her arm.

“Don’t worry, it won’t get her very far,” Patterson assures them. “I spoke with Captain Rendon and we’re expecting them both to get a decent amount of jail time. I thought you’d want to know.”

“Thank you,” Maya says. “We appreciate it.”

Patterson turns to Carina, his face softening underneath his mask. “I’m very sorry about your brother. I hope he’s okay.”

Carina nods. “Thank you.”

They watch as Patterson turns and leaves, the heavy door swinging shut behind him. Once they are alone again, Carina removes her mask and shoves it back in her pocket, exhaling slowly.

He had done it. This whole day of running around the city on Opal’s heels had ended the way that Andrew wanted – with Opal behind bars.

She just hopes he didn’t sacrifice himself for it.

Carina’s body slumps as she feels a wave of grief rush through her again and her body sways gently, until Maya’s hand is on her back, leading her back towards the pews to sit down.

“Deep breaths, okay?” she says softly.

Carina nods, her shoulders sagging. Her hands won’t stop shaking and she shoves them back into her pockets. Maya reaches out and puts a hand on her knee, squeezing it in comfort. She doesn’t say anything, like she knows that Carina is tired of making small talk. All she wants is to know her baby brother is okay.

Please God, just tell me he’s okay.

As if God is listening, the doors to the chapel open and they turn to see Owen and Teddy step inside. Carina is on her feet immediately, desperate for good news. She hooks her mask over her ears and waits for one of them to speak.

“The wound was more severe than we'd hoped, but he's pulled through,” Owen says.

It takes a moment for his words to make sense in her head. “Oh my God,” she murmurs.

“He's alive,” Teddy says in the simplest terms. “Your brother's alive.”

“Oh my God!” Carina cries, louder this time, the relief and joy flowing from her. She reaches out to them, though still keeps a distance. “Oh, it hurts not to hug you right now.”

They laugh and Carina feels the tension dropping from her body. Of course he will have a long recovery ahead of him, but he’s alive and she had been so frightened that she had lost him.

“Hey, look at them while you hug me,” Maya says, sliding her hands around her waist.

Carina practically falls into her arms, crying with relief, holding Maya as tightly as she can.

“Thank you,” she says over her shoulder to Teddy and Owen, who smile at her underneath their masks.

They turn, leaving Carina in Maya’s arms.

“He’s alive!” Maya says gleefully in her ear.

Carina nods against her shoulder. Maya’s arms are strong around her and she leans into her, letting her embrace hold her steady. Her hands finally feel like they have stopped shaking and she grasps at Maya’s jacket.

When they finally pull back, Carina removes her mask for a moment to wipe the – this time happy – tears from her cheeks. Maya lifts one hand to help her, the tips of her fingers soft against her dry cheeks. Her own cheeks are wet with tears, happy and relieved herself that Andrew has made it through his surgery okay.

“He’s alive,” Carina repeats.

“Yeah, he is,” Maya says. “He’s gonna be okay. And he’ll be back to annoying you like a little brother does before you know it.”

Carina pulls Maya into another hug, holding her tightly as she laughs again. She can’t wait.

“I want him to come and live with us.”

Maya pulls back and looks at her quizzically.

“Just for a bit,” Carina clarifies. “While he gets better. I want… I need to be the one to take care of him.”

She knows it is a big thing to ask when they have only just moved in together, but Maya is quick to agree. “Of course, whatever you want” She smiles. “You wanna go see him?”

Carina nods, yes. She needs to tell him that she loves him, that she’s mad at him for being so stubborn and big hearted, and that she will never let him do anything like this ever again.

Slipping her mask back on, they walk hand-in-hand through the hospital towards the surgical recovery ward. A sign on the door reminds them that only hospital personnel are permitted inside – Covid rules. Rules that can’t be broken, not even by a local fire captain.

Carina hesitates. Maya has been her side all day.

“It’s okay, you go,” Maya says.

“Are you sure? I know he’d love to see you too,” Carina says.

Maya’s eyes twinkle playfully. “Because I’m his favourite? You know I’m going to make him tell me about all the girlfriends who came before me,” she teases.

“He needs his rest,” Carina jokes back. “He shouldn’t be talking a lot.”

“Oh, so there’s a lot to talk about, is there?” Maya laughs.

Carina smiles as she steps towards her, taking her hands as she closes the gap between their bodies.

“I’m so glad you were with me today,” she says quietly.

“There’s nowhere else I would have been but with you.”

Carina leans down and presses her forehead against Maya’s, closing her eyes and breathing in the mix her scent. They stand there for a minute, maybe two, until Maya’s cell phone buzzes in her back pocket.

Maya pulls it out and reads the screen. “It’s an update on the four alarm fire,” she says. “The team are on their way back to the station.”

“Why don’t you go and check up on them?” Carina suggests. “And get an update on the inspection.”

“No,” Maya objects. “I told you, I’m not going anywhere.”

Carina smiles. “It’s okay. It’s probably going to be a while before Andrew wakes up. Besides…” her hand rests on the front of Maya’s shirt where Andrew’s blood has stained it red. “…you should get changed.”

Maya looks up at her. “Are you sure?”

Carina nods. “I’m sure.”

“Okay,” Maya agrees, although still reluctantly. “I’ll be back within an hour. I’ll grab some food on the way back, I bet you haven’t eaten all day?”

The mention of food makes Carina’s stomach grumble.

“Food would be good,” she says. She looks around to make sure no-one is too close, then pulls her mask down over her chin. She does the same to Maya’s mask and leans down to kiss her softly.

“I love you.”

Maya smiles. “I love you too.” She lifts her mask back up over her mask. “Say hi to Andrew for me, okay?”

Carina watches her retreat back down the corridor, then turns and pushes the double doors open, walking into the surgical recovery ward. Owen is stood by the nurses’ station.

“Hey Carina,” he greets her.

“How’s he doing?” Carina asks.

Owen gestures towards a room nearby and she falls into step beside him.

“We’ve taken him off sedation,” Owen tells her. “He suffered a lot of bleeding, but his vitals are stable.”

Andrew lays still, a tube down his throat to help him breath and wires linking him to the various machines that are monitoring him. Despite being taller and broader than she is, he looks small.

“Oh, Andrea,” Carina says softly.

As if he knows that his big sister is nearby, Andrew starts to stir. His eyes open and he looks around the room, momentarily confused by his surroundings.

“Hey, hey,” Carina calls out to him, rushing into the room and perching on his bed. She picks up his hand and rubs it between hers. “Hey. Easy, easy, don't try to talk.”

He looks towards her, his eyes slowly focussing on her. His face softens in recognition.

“You did it,” she tells him. “It's over. They arrested the woman, they arrested the man who stabbed you. You saved so many children, Andrea.” She smiles through her tears. “But I’m still mad at you.” She points her finger at him playfully and he smiles back at her. “Now, blink once for morphine and twice for "I'm a dummy who will never ignore his sister ever again”."

He blinks once, knowing it will make her laugh – which it does.

“You’re such a dummy,” she says. “But I love you. And I’m so proud of what you did today.”

She runs the back of her hand over his cheek.

“Maya says hello,” she remembers to tell him. “She’s checking on her team, but she’ll be back later. I’ll try and sneak her in to see you.”

Andrew gives a small nod of his head, a sign that he will be happy to see her too. It is not long before his eyes start to droop already, just being awake too much effort for him right now.

“Get some rest, okay,” she tells him. She climbs off the bed and pulls a stool close, keeping hold of his hand the whole time. “I’m going to stay right here.”

He frowns and she knows it is his way of telling her to go and get some rest, but exhaustion wins and he drifts off. Carina sits with his hand in hers, watching his chest rise and fall with each breath. The song they sang on the train comes back into her head and she finds herself singing softly to him, like she did when he was a little boy.

“Avrai sorrisi sul tuo viso come ad agosto grilli e stelle,

Storie fotografate dentro un album rilegato in pelle,

I tuoni di aerei supersonici che fanno alzar la testa,

E il buio all'alba che si fa d'argento alla finestra.”

As she sits and waits, Carina realises how much she hurts – not just mentally, but physically as well. Her whole body feels heavy from the grief and exhaustion that it carries. She straightens her spine every now and again, rolling her shoulders back and trying to soothe her aching muscles, everything feeling tight. What she wouldn’t give for a glass of wine and hot bath right now.

Her cell phone pings at one point, a message from Maya, letting her know that she is about to leave the station. Carina sends a message back to tell her that Andrew had woken up for a moment and asking her to swing by Little Roma for her favourite fettucine dish, craving some comfort food right now.

Andrew stirs every now and again, giving Carina the chance to talk to him a little – reciting some Italian poems and telling stories from their childhood, something soothing to help keep him calm. The tube down his throat means he can’t talk back to her, but his eyes let her know that he is grateful she is there.

As he sleeps again, Carina leans back in her chair and reaches her arms above her head, stretching and yawning at the same time. It is almost nine p.m. but she feels like she hasn’t slept in days.

“You look exhausted,” comes a voice from behind her. She turns to see Owen in the doorway.

“I’m okay,” she lies. She looks back at Andrew. “I don’t want to go home and leave him here alone.”

“You want me to get you some coffee?” Owen offers.

She realises that coffee would do her some good right now – even if it is the crappy cafeteria kind.

“I think I’ll stretch my legs, go grab a cup,” Carina says. “You’ll be here?”

“Of course,” Owen says. “I’m just catching up with charts out by the nurses desk.”

Carina stands and makes her way to the door, pausing when she is next to him and reaching out to place her hand on his arm. “Thank you, Owen. For everything.”

“You’re welcome, Carina,” Owen says with a nod of his head.

She walks slowly through the hospital, her body too tired to rush. Andrew will be drifting in and out of consciousness for a while, and she knows he is in safe hands with Owen nearby. She avoids the vending machines and heads to the cafeteria, ordering an extra shot in her coffee. There are only two other people in there, those on a late night shift who are taking a much-needed break. Carina occupies a table by the window, looking out at the people below. She can see the admissions tent lit up in the dark, still a line of people waiting to be seen.

It is hard to believe that it was only fourteen hours ago that she bumped into Andrew in the parking lot. So much has happened since then.

She runs her hand through her matted hair. Maybe she should have asked Maya to bring her a hairbrush. Her bag is still in the trunk of her car, abandoned outside the train station, no doubt covered in parking tickets by now. She’ll have to ask Maya to retrieve it for her tomorrow.

She rubs her tired eyes as she waits for the caffeine to kick in. Her cell phone buzzes with messages from colleagues who have heard about Andrew, offering get well wishes. Everyone is so kind and thoughtful, and her heart is warmed by the way they all care so deeply about him. She has never worked at a hospital like Grey Sloan. Before she moved to Seattle, Andrew would tell her that they were like a big family and she had always scoffed disbelievingly. It turns out he was right, just like he was right about a lot of things.

Like Opal. Why hadn’t she listened to him instead of brushing off his concerns as another manic episode? He had been adamant all those months ago that Opal was abusing the girl she had brought to the hospital but Carina hadn’t believed him. No-one had believed him. Well, that would change from now on.

Once her coffee cup is empty, she makes her way back to the surgical recovery ward. The nurses’ station is empty and Carina looks across to the other side of the floor where everyone is piled into another room. She can hear the familiar beeping of the machines that tell her a patient is coding and she says a silent prayer, as she always does, before slipping into Andrew’s room.

Her blood runs cold when she sees the horror before her. Andrew is gone, a space where his bed should be. Wires that once connected him to the machines now hang loose and the screens that once told her that his heart was still beating in his chest are blank.

And the blood – there is so much blood.

It is smeared across the pale tiles where the wheels of the bed have rolled. Footprints of all shapes and sizes have been left behind, a trail of breadcrumbs leading out of the room and towards the elevator that she didn’t see before, too caught up in her thoughts to notice it.

“Oh Dio, no…”

She becomes aware of someone by her side, talking in her ear, but she doesn’t hear what they are saying. Their voice becomes distant and there is a whistling in her ears as she starts to run down the corridor and towards the operating rooms. Her eyes quickly scour the surgery board and she spies her brother’s name against OR 3. People call out to her and she ignores them, making her way towards the gallery. She only stops when someone grabs her arm, a firm hand resting just about her elbow.

“Carina, no.”

Her head whips around angrily.

“Let go of me!”

Richard loosens his grip but doesn’t let go entirely. “You can’t go in there, you know the rules.”

‘Fuck the rules,’ she thinks, but even in her despair she remembers her manners.

She looks at him desperately, her eyes pleading for empathy. “I should be with him,” she says. “He needs me.”

“Hunt and Altman are with him,” Richard says. “They need to focus on what they’re doing. There’s a reason why we don’t allow family members in the OR, you know that.”

He oozes sympathy towards her. Carina’s body trembles with fear and anger, and she shakes him off, can’t bear his touch, but she doesn’t disobey him.

“D.I.C.?”

She already knows the answer. She knew when she saw the lumps of coagulated blood on the floor of his room. She has seen it before, a complication from childbirth sometimes.

“Yes,” Richard says sombrely. “They had to open him back up, they’re transfusing him now.”

“Is…” she can barely ask the question but she needs to know, "…is he going to make it?”

Richard pauses before he answers and she knows why. “I don’t know,” he answers honestly.

Carina feels her body convulse and there is a sharp metallic taste in the back of her throat as bile rises up from her stomach. Her hand flies to her mouth and she finds the wall behind her, using it to keep her upright. She fixes her eyes on a black mark on the opposite wall, filling her lungs with air and exhaling slowly, desperate to stop the contents of her stomach from ending up on the floor.

Richard stays by her side. “Let’s get you somewhere quieter,” he says softly.

She nods and lets him lead her away to a private room, blocking out the stares and whispers that follow her as they walk. He calls for Helm and tells her that he is going to check for an update, asks the young woman to stay and sit with her while he is gone.

Taryn is a sweet, kind, smart resident, if a little naïve about the world, and Carina usually has time for her but not today. Her sad face and trembling lips and wide eyes are too much for Carina to bear right now, so she mostly ignores her.

“Car-“ Taryn changes her mind, deciding she doesn’t know her well enough to ignore formalities in the current circumstances. “Doctor DeLuca, is there anything I can get you?”

Carina has only one answer. “Maya.”

She doesn’t know how much time has passed since her last message but she figures Maya must be close to the hospital by now and she is the only person Carina wants with her.

“I can try and call her?”

Carina reaches for her cell phone. Her hands won’t stop shaking and it takes her a moment to open the screen before she passes it to Helm. Taryn stands up and moves to the far corner of the room, as far out of earshot as she can to make the call. Before she has the chance, the door swings open.

“Carina?”

Maya rushes into the room and is by her side in seconds, the takeout container in her hands flung to one side. Her arm is tight around Carina’s back, her breath warm on her neck as she leans in close. “I’m here.”

Carina sits in a stunned silence, her eyes glazing over as she stares at a scuff on the tiled floor.

“We have to stay positive, okay?” Maya says, although her voice wobbles and she doesn’t sound as sure as she did a few hours ago.

Carina shakes her head. Maya didn’t see the room or the blood that was left behind. She doesn’t know what it means to go into D.I.C. or to have your chest ripped open for a second time in a matter of hours.

“He must be so scared,” is all she can think and say.

“What can I do?” Maya asks. “What do you need?”

Carina shakes her head. She doesn’t know what she needs.

Maya understands her silence. She leans forwards and places a kiss on her temple, then leans her forehead against hers. Carina reaches for Maya’s jacket, grasping it tightly, desperate to do something with her hands to stop them from shaking. She squeezes her eyes shut and takes a deep breath, taking in the heady scent of Maya’s perfume, newly sprayed as she had freshened up at the station.

She pleads with God to save her brother, promises to do anything He wants if only He will make sure that Andrew lives.

They stay like this until a quiet knock at the door captures their attention. Carina’s head jerks upwards just as Owen and Teddy walk into the room. She knows without them having to say a word that her prayers have been ignored. They are wearing it all over their faces: their sorrow and grief at the loss.

“Carina…”

“No, don’t,” Carina puts her hands up to stops Owen from speaking. If he doesn’t say it, it isn’t true.

Owen looks to Teddy for help.

“I’m sorry, Carina,” Teddy says, her voice shaking. “We did everything we could, we tried for forty minutes, but his heart was too badly damaged and…”

“Stop!”

“Carina,” Maya says soothingly, her arm tight around her waist. It is a cold comfort right now and Carina pushes her away.

“No!” She turns back towards Owen and Teddy. “You were supposed to fix him! You’re trauma surgeons, you’ve fixed people in the middle of a war zone! You can’t… you can’t give up! You have to go back in there and save him! Please, you have to save him!”

They stare at her blankly as she yells at them and she slowly realises that she has slipped into Italian. She falls silent and just stares back at them as she tries to comprehend what is happening.

Andrew is dead. Her sweet baby brother is gone forever. She’ll never see his smile, never hear his laugh, never feel his big strong arms around her. It doesn’t feel real and yet she knows it is true because every inch of her body is screaming with pain.

Carina feels as if time has stopped still. The room is shrinking, the walls are closing in on her. It is quiet, the only noise coming from the corridor outside. She feels Maya’s hand slip into hers and a gentle squeeze around her fingers.

The moment is interrupted by a wail that pierces her ears and Carina wants to tell whoever it is to shut up, except she can’t because the sound is coming from her. It is a shrill, animalistic cry like one might hear in the wild, as grief rips her apart. Her whole body is trembling and the room starts to spin, and Carina loses her balance, falling to the ground. Her knees hit the hard floor and pain jolts through her, yet it is nothing in comparison to the way her heart hurts.

“Maya…” she cries out desperately, her arm flailing as it reaches for her girlfriend.

Maya drops down next to her and wraps her arms around her, pulls her close and whispers words of comfort. Carina doesn’t listen to what she is saying, but lets the sound of her voice fill her ears. She leans into Maya’s body and buries her head into her chest, blocking out everything and everyone around her as her tears fall down her cheeks and soak into Maya’s shirt. Her chest feels tight and she struggles to catch her breath.

“Breathe, Carina. Just breathe,” Maya murmurs. “In…” she says as she inhales; “…and out.”

Carina concentrates on Maya’s chest moving up and down and tries to mimic her breath in and out.

“That’s it,” Maya says as Carina’s body starts to calm. “That’s it, in and out.”

When she feels calmer, Carina pulls back. Her face is clammy and her hair sticks to the side of her face, her eyes red and her cheeks pinched. Maya strokes her skin gently and gives her the time she needs to collect her thoughts.

“I want to see him,” Carina says eventually.

Maya looks uncertain, so Carina shifts her gaze over her shoulder to where Teddy is now sat on a chair on one side of the room.

“Please. I need to see him.”

“Carina, he’s not ready. We need to…”

“I know,” she interjects.

She’s a doctor, she knows what she will find in that OR. He’ll be lying on an operating table, tubes and wires still hanging from him. His chest will gape open and blood will stain the sheets, the table and the floor. He won’t look like her brother, not the sweet kind face that she sees in her head when she closes her eyes. He’ll be pale, every last ounce of life drained from him. But she needs to see him, she needs the chance to say goodbye.

He won’t get a proper funeral, not while they are in the middle of a pandemic. He won’t get the flow of visitors paying their respects as he rests, he won’t get the collective prayers, they won’t be able to celebrate his life in the way that he deserves. He’s a hero and his death will be buried amongst the thousands of victims of the virus that continues to plague the world.

Carina stands. She is a little wobbly on her feet and she is grateful for Maya’s steady hand.

“Are you sure?” Maya asks tentatively.

Carina nods resolutely.

Maya reaches out and wipes the mascara that pools under her eyes, her touch tender. Carina closes her eyes for a moment, drawing strength from Maya’s gesture before she looks back at Teddy.

“I’m ready.”

Maya keeps one arm wrapped around Carina’s waist and the other grasps her hands as she guides her down the corridor behind Teddy and Owen. Owen steps inside OR 3 without them and Carina knows that he is doing his best to clean up some of the mess that is bound to have been left behind. Her hands still shake and she holds on to Maya a little tighter, doesn’t want to let go of someone else she loves.

Owen appears in the doorway. Carina knows from the look on his face that he thinks this is a bad idea but she can’t feel any worse than she already does. She turns towards Maya.

“Will you stay with me?”

She knows she is asking a lot, to ask Maya to see her brother’s broken body like this, but the truth is that she doesn’t think she can do it without her.

“Of course I will,” Maya says.

Owen steps to one side and they walk into the operating room. Only Bokhee is there. She is sitting at the top of the table, a bowl of water next to her and a wet cloth in her hands. She wipes the blood and trauma from Andrew’s face, her movements slow and gentle and taken with such care.

Carina thought that the sight of the OR would be traumatic, but she doesn’t take in the chaos of the room. Her eyes focus only on Andrew. She walks up to the table slowly, finally letting go of Maya’s hand as she rests one hand on his shoulder and the other on the top of his head, his dark hair as unruly as it always is.

“Oh, Andrea,” she says as she lowers her head and leaves a kiss on his forehead.

His body is already turning cold, but his skin is soft and damp from where Bokhee has been cleaning his face. She looks over at the nurse.

“Thank you, Bokhee.”

Bokhee nods. “I’ll come back later,” she says, gliding backwards on her stool and standing up. Before she leaves, she pauses and reaches out, placing a hand on Carina’s arm. “I prayed for him.”

Carina’s eyes prick with tears at the act of kindness and she nods her thanks, before turning back to Andrew. She takes in his whole body this time, her eyes sweeping over the thick blue sheets that cover his chest. She knows what they hide. She moves her eyes back to his face. The breathing tube has been removed from his mouth and he almost looks like he is wearing a smile.

Perhaps he is, she thinks. All he had cared about on their way to the hospital was knowing that they had caught Opal and stopped her from harming any more young girls, and she had seen the relief wash over him when he learned that the police had taken her away.

She thinks about the train ride they took together and how she had finally told him the truth about why they had been separated as children. She has never regretted her decision, always believing that it was right that he had been able to grow up without the burden of their father’s illness resting on his shoulders, but she mourns all those lost years that they will never get back – even more now.

She reaches for the stool that Bokhee left behind and sits down beside him, running the back of her hand over his stubbled cheek as she starts to sing quietly.

“Avrai sorrisi sul tuo viso come ad agosto grilli e stelle,

Storie fotografate dentro un album rilegato in pelle,

I tuoni di aerei supersonici che fanno alzar la testa,

E il buio all'alba che si fa d'argento alla finestra.”

She only gets through the first few lines before her throat closes up and the words get stuck.

“I heard you singing that in the aid car, it’s beautiful,” Maya’s voice breaks the silence. “What is it?”

“It’s a song I used to sing him when he was little and couldn’t sleep,” Carina explains. She curls her fingers into his thick hair. She leans into Maya’s body, resting her head under the crook of her arm. “I should have stopped him.”

“Carina, no…”

“I knew that it was messy, I knew that we should have waited for the police, but he was so adamant that he was going to stop her. I didn’t believe him the first time and I wanted him to know that I believed him this time.”

A tear trickles down her face, the guilt overwhelming her.

Maya rolls a stool closer and sits down beside her, hooking her finger under Carina’s chin and encouraging her to look at her for a moment.

“Don’t do this. Don’t blame yourself, it is not your fault,” Maya says vehemently. Carina looks at her with such sadness that Maya feels her heart aching in her chest. “He was going to follow Opal no matter what. And you stayed with him like any good sister would do. You were with him; when it mattered the most you were with him. And when he called your name, you were there.”

Carina’s face crumples and Maya gathers her up in another tight embrace. Carina didn’t think she had any tears left in her but they just keep coming and there is nothing she can do to stop them. She buries her face into Maya’s neck. Her head hurts, her body dehydrated, and she doesn’t think she will ever feel normal again. How can she when her brother is dead?

They are two halves of one whole, and without him she is incomplete.

“We should get you home,” Maya says, her voice soft and low as she rubs Carina’s back soothingly.

“I can’t leave him,” is Carina’s muffled reply.

“I know,” Maya says sympathetically. “I know, but we can’t stay here forever. You have to say goodbye.”

Carina pulls back and shakes her head, her voice cracking. “I don’t want to leave him on his own.”

There is a beat before a new but familiar voice enters the room. “He won’t be alone.”

Carina looks over her shoulder and blinks away the tears that blur her vision until Bailey comes into view, flanked by Richard and Bokhee. Bailey walks towards her, a gentle hand resting on her back while the other smooths the curls on Andrew’s forehead.

“We’re going to clean him up now,” Bailey says gently.

Carina tips her head and smiles gratefully, a momentary break of the grief that is painted on her face.

“It’s not your job,” she says.

“Well, today it is.”

Bailey’s tone is kind, but firm, and Carina knows that she will not be dissuaded from the unwanted task. She looks back at her brother lying peacefully on the table.

“I don’t know how to do it,” she says.

She is aware of the puzzled faces around her, the shared look of confusion between Maya and Miranda.

“Do what?” Maya asks gently.

“Say goodbye,” Carina says. She looks over to Maya, her hands outstretched between them. “Two halves, one whole.” She holds her palms together, like she had in the chapel earlier that day.

Maya takes her hands and squeezes them gently. “Do you want a moment alone with him?”

Carina nods. As Maya stands, she leans forward and plants a kiss on the top of her head. Carina leans into her for a moment, her body feeling cold once Maya is gone from her side. She spins to face her brother, leaning closer to whisper in his ear.

“I love you and I’m so proud of you,” she says, tears falling from her eyes and dropping on to his cheeks. “I’ll miss you always. Give Mama big kiss from me when you see her, okay?” She chokes back a sob. “I love you, il mio fratellino.”

Carina drops down to kiss his cheek. “Addio.”

She pulls back slowly and stands up. The moment she turns away from him, she feels herself reaching for Maya, falling into her arms and sobbing as the grief spills out of her.

Her heart is broken, shattered into a million pieces, and she doesn’t know how she will ever be able to put it back together. She knows for certain that it will never be whole again, it can’t be.

They are two halves forever separated.

#station 19 #grey's anatomy #maya bishop #carina deluca #andrew deluca #station 19 fanfiction #my fanfiction #serendipity

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