#I want a place to be mine and to have an asset

[crimsonblackrose]

I’m absolutely fascinated that when I talk to friends, my aunt and uncle (not the ones I live with), my cousins, my aunt’s best friend about my next goal buying my own place everyone nods like this is a sage and smart decision and gives me advice. Meanwhile I visit my older sisters and ask for their advice and I get lectured on what a terrible idea it is. 💀

#mumblings #I'm tired of moving #I'm tired of not putting down roots #I want a place to be mine and to have an asset #my sisters want me to rent and not buy a place which just feels like a waste of money to me #but I don't know I think I'm disappointed that I came to them with all these plans of things I want to do and accomplish #that I thought was logical and every single one of them was shot down as if they were the dumbest decisions ever #and unrealistic #to be fair my sisters and I have not discussed finances #but damn this was disheartening #especially because the reasoning just doesn't feel...right #like I wasn't given a good reason not to just that I shouldn't...so I'm like ???? #it felt like they were trying to prepare me for disapointment but mostly like I was being lectured for no reason? #like you should rent first just to rent? #why? #that was the reason to rent just so I've rented #Like I have rented just not in the states #It's not like I missed out on that experience #ugh I just was hoping for some better advice related to whatever talk my aunt and uncle that I live with are going to have #and I feel like we just argued for no reason and didn't understand one another and it's frustrating #like at least my friends have warned me that interest rates are awful #but that's a logical warning you know #not just rent to have the experience of renting #or like get a car first how is that logical? I don't even know how to drive 😬💀 #I wish they'd just have been straight with me about why they thought it was a bad idea specifically #I feel like I didn't gain any advice just frustration

[itsharleystuff]

- ̥۪͙۪˚┊❛ 𝐌Í𝐀 ❜┊˚ ̥۪͙۪◌

Gif not mine!

— 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Javier Peña x afab!fem reader (implied hispanic/latina)

— 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.3k

— 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: After a major fight between the two of you, a month goes by in which you give each other the silent treatment, figuring out if you should start seeing different people. However, Javier has a problem: he can’t get his dick hard for anyone that isn’t you. So, when he sees how easily you can move on from him, he gets awfully jealous.

— 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 18+ content (minors dni!), sex, possessive/jealous behavior, unprotected sex, p in v, cuffs, slight dirty talk, semi-public sex, use of ‘slut’, pet names (sweetheart, corazón, cariño, hermosa, etc.), praise kink, come eating, oral sex (f! & m! receiving), mentions of drugs, smoking, a bit of angst, very little plot (mostly filth), weirdly structured plot. I think that’s it.

— a/n: there’s some phrases and words in Spanish, some are translated and some aren’t. Let me know if translations are needed :)

No use of y/n.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

Javier Peña has never been a jealous man.

It's simply never been in his nature, not even when he was a child playing around with toys that he loved to share. And nowadays? Well, he had other stuff in mind that didn't leave any room for those pedestrian feelings.

As of now, he -supposedly- didn't have anything to be worried about. Specially not women.

Everyone knew he fucked hookers so good that they'd spill all their secrets in his ear, and that he was attractive enough to leave a bar with company just after a couple of minutes from arriving there. But to anyone observant, it was obvious how bad he had it for you.

Still, that didn't stop him from being an asshole.

You remember the last time you two spoke and how it turned out to be a fucking disaster: basically, he didn't like the idea of exclusivity because it involved feelings that he wasn't ready to admit, so you had called him a slut (along with many other insults) and he'd said that you were childish and sensitive. So naturally, everything went downhill after that fight.

Currently, things were pretty tense with Javier, even at work. But things just got worse when the Colombian police sent you onto an undercover mission, nothing really extravagant but still quite dangerous. And apparently, the DEA knew nothing about it.

The task was rather simple: you'd go to one of Medellin's busiest nightclubs and find out if there was a cocaine distribution line working there. The problem was what the agent had overheard from Carrillo. Not only did he knew now that you were at the place, but he also had word that one of the cartel's most wanted sicarios was about to be there too. And knowing the Coronel as well as he did, you were right in the middle of a crossfire. He arrived at the club earlier than any of them, hoping to find you quickly and draw you out before the asset came in.

But, oh hell.

What he saw the minute he stepped in almost made him lose his shit.

⩇⩇:⩇⩇

You had no business being in there this late. You'd already passed down all the information needed to your boss and now you were just waiting for the cartel's member to arrive so you could call Carrillo and let him finish the job.

But in the meantime, you decided to at least try and have some fun. After everything that went on with Peña, you felt like you deserved a distraction.

The music was loud, reggaetón reverberating in your body as you danced, eyes wide awake in case the target decided to show up. The stranger you were dancing with had his hands all over your body, holding you close to him while you moved in synch. He was handsome in a boyish way, and a bit clumsy, but good enough to take your mind off from the irritating DEA agent. At least for now.

To be honest, you didn't lack any attention at the moment. Both men and women would come up to you, hoping to get a piece of what you had to offer. It came without saying that everything about you tonight resulted appealing to the kind of people that frequented the place, being an undercover assignment you did your best to blend in. And it seemed to work out wonderfully. The flashy makeup and short dress that only accentuated your figure made you stand out amongst the rest; nevertheless, what really attracted everyone's gaze wasn't any of that, but the confidence with which you'd walk around the place like you owned it.

"¿Qué tal si nos vamos pa' un lugar más oscurito, mamacita?" (How about we go to a more private place?) The guy, whose name you didn't even know, proposed. And though the idea sounded nice, your job wasn't quite finished.

"Not yet, papi. Dame un par de canciones más." (Let's dance a bit more). He hummed in response, his hands traveling from your lower back to grab your ass firmly.

"Usted manda." (You call the shots). The answer made you smile cheekily as you lean in to him, hoping to connect his lips with yours.

However, you definitely didn't expect to be abruptly pulled back with force instead, ripping you apart from the man's hold.

"What the hell..." you start to complain and twist in the strangers grasp, who started to drag you out the dance floor and keeping your wrists behind your back.

"Hombre, ¿pero qué diablo' le pasa?" (What's wrong with you, man?). Asked your poor companion, glancing over at the guy that took you away from him.

But you knew exactly who he was even before he spoke. You'd recognize that musky cologne anywhere, mixed with the scent of cigarette smoke. Damn, even your body recognized him so well that the way his fingertips dig on your skin flooded your mind with memories from the past.

"Peña." You mutter through gritted teeth, not bothering to turn your head towards him.

"It's agent Peña to you, sweetheart." He snarls, completely blowing off anyone that would try to get in his way to lug you outside.

A new, fueled up rage crept up your spine while he harshly pulls you to te entrance, right were you see the colonel's target going in.

"Let go of me, mierda!" You struggle against him, not wanting to actually put on a fight but just make him reason. "I have a fucking job to do, so let go of me or..."

"Or what?" Javier spins you around carelessly, leaving your face so close to his that your breaths merged with each other's, chest pressed against your own as he keeps you still, his hands gripping you so hard that it would certainly leave bruises.

"I need to call Carrillo. I'm working, even if you don't believe it." You tell him, letting your racing heartbeat start to settle.

The man's eyes were dark, covered by a shadow of anger that matched his stern expression. He was always handsome, but whenever he'd get mad, Javi was hot. Although it was unusual for you to see him like this, him being always attentive and careful, though still very passionate. He would never explode, not even when the stress and tension became too much to handle. But then, you realize...

"No way..." you scoff, keeping direct eye contact. "You're jealous, aren't you?"

His reaction is immediate, turning your body again and flushing your face against the trunk of his jeep Cherokee, bending you over the car. You gasp audibly, feeling the cold metal under your cheek and his body towering upon you while he holds you down by the back of your neck. Javier's lips brush the top of your ear when he leans down to you.

"The fuck do I need to be jealous about, cariño?" He whispers lowly, his hot breath giving you goosebumps and making your knees tremble. "Eres mía, you've always been."

Ah, fuck.

Despite all the shit that you went through with him, the effect he had on you remained the same. No matter what, the agent was aware of it, conscious of how you'd always melt under his touch, he just knew all your sweet spots by core memory and what'll have you squirming underneath him. Yeah, even if your mind tried it's best to erase Peña, your body would always betray you.

"You lost your chance." You mutter in a bittersweet tone. "Now get the hell off me so I can finish my task."

He doesn't instantly let go, but eventually loosens the grip on your nape. Though right when you thought he'd actually let you free, there's a cold metallic sensation brushing on your wrist and you suddenly can't move your arms from your back. The motherfucker had just cuffed you.

"Malparido, hijo de..." You ramble, straightening your back to glance at him in exasperation.

"Don't move." He growls, opening the driver's door and taking his radio out. The agent starts to talk through it, but you're way too outraged as to pay any attention, your vision going red when you catch your name, the words 'Carrillo', 'sicario' and the place were you're at, figuring out that he's doing the part of the job that corresponded to you.

"You're sick, Peña." There's no reply to the snarky comment as he simply shoves you in the back of his truck, rather carefully, considering the situation.

You watch intently while he gets back on his seat, analyzing every detail about him. It wasn't anything special, you had seen him quite often at work after your fight, and nonetheless, now... Something seemed off.

Javier was wearing a red button shirt under his black leather jacket, from which he drew out a pack of cigs and a lighter. He appeared the same, however, you could sense the tension on his shoulders and back, the kind you'd help him deal with before, and it almost felt like he was holding back from doing something. Heck, you hated it. You completely despised arguing with him, being apart from the man almost made you physically unwell.

But that was the root of this whole problem. You were able to admit it; how much you liked him and didn't want anyone else. Him on the other hand, wasn't ready for all that. Although, despite him implying that he couldn't fully commit or correspond to your feelings... Right now, his actions were very contradicting.

Because Javier Peña never got jealous.

And yet, there he was.

Perhaps, if you spurred him on just enough and cornered him in a trap... Perhaps then, he'd be able to admit it. 

"So what now, agent?" You wonder, laying your back flat on the leather sit, feeling the coldness of the material on your exposed skin and trying to find a comfortable position. "You mind explaining yourself?"

He looks at you through the rear-view mirror, brows furrowed and jaw clenched. A challenging fire shines in your eyes when you lock glances with him. But he doesn't say anything, simply starting the car and getting the windows down before lighting up a cigarette.

"What about you, sweetheart?" He asks, the fag hanging from between his lips as he starts driving away from the club. "Care for elaborating on your actions?"

You snort, gaze diverting towards the window. "I was just killing time."

The streets of Medellin were loud and busy, specially on the weekends. But at the moment, the paths were dark and quiet, as if everyone knew that there was a storm coming and they had to stay out of the hood.

"So that's your idea of 'killing time'?" He comes again, tapping the cigar out his window to leave the ashes behind. "Letting random men grope you in those wrenched bars?" You grin, still defying him with your attitude. "And yet, I'm the slut..."

"You must certainly are, Peña." You reply condescendingly, watching the road. "When I was with you, that was it. No one else even crossed my mind. But then, you? How many other women did you have besides me?"

He grunts, taking a long drag without looking back in your direction. You recognize certain spots and locals, but none of them were anywhere close to your apartment. Instead of asking were he was taking you to, the idea you previously had lingers on your mind.

Red light.

"You know, ever since we... Well, ghosted each other. I've actually had tons of fun." His eyes darkened, but no matter all the warning signs he was sending with his body, you just couldn't hold back anymore, starting to play a game that might get out of control. "Actually, you know that guy working with the CIA? Balcázar?"

Javier looked so gorgeous while driving. His big hands over the lever and muscles flexing whenever he'd make sudden moves. Even now, tense as an arrow an white-knuckling the wheel at your words, he was the hottest man you'd seen.

"Shit, he’s good..." you purr, slightly arching your back so he'll get a better view of your breasts, barely contained in that tiny dress you were wearing. "I really miss him. Hated it when he went back to New York."

His stormy glare was on you, watching closely every single move you made. Your legs were briefly parted, just enough for him to peek a sight of your laced underwear. The agent's breathing became ragged and he had to try his best to stay concentrated.

"Careful, cariño." You hear him rasp out with a hint of danger. "You really don't want to go there."

Green light.

He puts the cigarette out and throws the tail away carelessly.

"Ay, Peña." Your voice goes an octave lower, licking your lips. "Don't act like you haven't been to every brothel in the city trying to fill in my spot."

The man huffs a laugh, shaking his head in disapproval. "I know what you're doing." You look at him through your lashes, faking innocence and confusion. "But if you really want me to say it, there hasn't been anyone else."

"Yeah, right..." That mocking tone was really getting on his nerves.

"Not even when we were together." Javi sulks out.

"Then why was it so difficult for you to be serious with me?" You question grimly. "Do you not like me?"

His eyes bore back into yours somberly, as if you'd just said the stupidest thing in the world despite the graveness in your voice and expression, lazily scanning you head to toe.

"Like you?" It sounded like he was struggling not to come off sardonic, cocking an eyebrow at you. "I can't believe you just asked me that."

You lean in towards him when he takes an unexpected turn, inhaling his particular scent mixed with the leather and smoke. Suddenly, he parks the car someplace dark and empty that resembled an abandoned gas station. Kind of creepy, but you recognized the area now. It was a neighborhood located a couple of blocks away from his apartment.

"Why?" You coo, taunting, patiently testing how much he'd spill. But Javier won't meet your glance, focused on the nothingness ahead of him.

"Because I can't even get my dick hard for any other women, for fucks sake!" He howls, rubbing his face with his palm, clearly pissed.

At first, you thought he must've been joking. But the way he said it came out so frustrated that it made it hard to believe he was lying. His bold statement gave you a rush of power, knowing that you had him in mind and body, the man that made every woman he acquainted feel like a schoolgirl crushing on a senior. You understood why he was so mad right now; it wasn't only cause he was jealous, but because he hated seeing that you could easily move on to the next man while he remained stuck.

Though it was a lie. You only responded to him and you wanted to prove him that. But Javier had to acknowledge the mistake he made.

"Perhaps you're just old." You teased, "Have you tried pills for that?"

His reaction was so unexpected that you had barely any time to process the circumstances. He got out the car and opened the passenger's seat, tugging at your arm to get you out the jeep apprehensively.

"Take a guess, sweetheart." He grits next to your ear, his chest pressed to your back.

"Fucking hell..." you mewl at the feeling of Javier's hard boner firm against your ass. His hands hold your waist for a second before manhandling you to the edge of the back passenger's seat, hunching down in front of you with both hands gently gripping the exposed flesh of your thighs and looking up at you with fiery eyes.

"If you want me to say it, fine." He bites, giving up. "I made a mistake. It was stupid." Then his tone denotes the way he's struggling to contain anger. "I can't bear it. Seeing you with other men... It drives me insane. I can't even think straight- shit, I almost blew a whole ass operation tonight just because I saw you dancing with that guy." You gulp, remembering how furious he was just a few moments ago. "But let's not fool ourselves, cariño. We both know you haven't slept with anyone else either."

How he figured that out was a mystery to you. Maybe he truly was a very good agent.

There isn't a retort in your behalf. What could you possibly say anyway? He had you figured out already, he always did.

Back in the day, when you first started working with him, Javier acted like a complete shithead. Him an Murphy would give you a hard time with the DEA, always getting in trouble, messing up your schedules and bribing confidential information out of you. That's how you grew closer to him. Peña used to invite you for dinner or beers as an apology, granted that he always looked forward to take you back to his apartment, of course. Except you had heard the rumors regarding his reputation, and that was a well in which you weren't particularly eager to fall in, specially since he was a coworker.

Yet, it was all in vain. How could you ever say no to him if he'd look at you with those sparkly, deep brown eyes that resembled a lost puppy? You fell for Javi's smug smirk, the groovy hair, plus that confident and bite-back attitude of his, knowing how it would eventually end. Even so, no one could really blame you. He acted different around you, people were able to tell, brighter, more open and honest.

"See, I'm sorry about what I said..." you start, but he cuts you off.

"Don't be. I deserved that shit." The man stands up, taking a bunch of keys from the pocket of his jeans and going to take off the cuffs. "You should feel sorry for all those poor guys you toyed with while thinking about me the whole time."

You stretch your arms and massage your wrists, unwilling to meet his intense gaze, conscious that you'd fall for his charm immediately. He worked smarter, grabbing your chin to raise your face towards him.

"Did you enjoy it?" He hissed, fingertips digging on your jaw with moderate force. "Having other men grab your ass while everyone watches? Teasing the hell out of me in the office with those obscenely tight skirts and talking to Murphy as if I wasn't right beside him?" Your tongue darts out to lick your lower lip, not breaking eye contact. "Answer me, corazón."

"Yes," you respond cockily, "I enjoyed it." His face swiftly sobered, a muscle feathering in his jaw. "But I didn't think it had any effect on you, so it felt like a waste of time and effort."

Javier laughs huskily, bending forward. You close your eyes, thinking he's going in for a kiss, but instead his lips go to rest on your jawline, pressing open-mouthed kisses along your neck and all the way down to the valley of your breasts. As of now, you're a panting mess, already turned on by his adamant behavior. The fact that you were finally getting to feel him like this after a month or so of completely ignoring each other... It felt divine.

Your tug at his shoulder as he keeps nibbling the sensitive skin. The agent knew your body better than anyone else ever could, he'd memorized all the spots that would have you moaning and squirming underneath him, which was the case just now.

"Javi..." you sigh, running your hand through his hair.

"You're such a fucking brat." He reflects, kneeling between your parted legs. "A month ago I was merely a ghost to you, a few minutes prior I was simply 'Peña'. But when my lips are on you I'm suddenly 'Javi'?" He boasts with a devilish grin. "How convenient..."

"Mmm..." he laughs gruffly at your loss of words, his fingers hooking your underwear beneath the dress and slowly pulling it down.

At this point you're so wet it's embarrassing. It was probably due to the lack of sex you've had recently, or perhaps you were really growing fond of this new phase of his and the idea of Javier being possessive over you.

"Don't you dare look away." He warns roughly, peeling the fabric off you with a tad of your help. "Keep your eyes on me. I'll only tell you this once."

You nod eagerly. "Javi, are we- are we going to do it here?" It wouldn't be a new thing, you've done similar stuff in the past, though never in such an open space, despite appearing deserted. "Your place is barely a few blocks away..." His lips graze the soft skin of your upper leg, the feeling of his mustache raising goosebumps on your body.

"Can't wait." He stated, voice tinted with lust whilst his palm caresses your calf. "Need you now."

Somehow that made the pit of your stomach feel warmer. The rush of excitement coming from that desire he had for you had gave a thrill of control, completely ignoring how he was the one in charge of this situation. Javier carefully slips your dress upwards, taking in every single reaction you had to his touch and cursing at the sight of your throbbing pussy. The heat of his breath against your exposed core only increased your arousal, seemingly encouraging him.

"Shit, this cunt really did miss me, huh?" You nod again, basking in the contact of his nose brushing your clit, sending shivers down your spine.

In spite of your low whimpers of need, he deliberately denied you of his touch were you most needed him, simply roaming his lips and fingers over your inner thighs and pubic bone. Desperate, you scratch his scalp softly, pulling a groan from him.

"Javi, please..." he was definitely going to make you beg for it, regardless of how much he wanted it too. 

"Did you let anyone else do this to you?"

"No." You breathe out.

"Good." His thumb suddenly falls on your clit, rubbing slow circles. You squeal from the spontaneousness of the action, squeezing your eyes shut for a second. "This is mine." Then he slides down his finger to slightly part your swollen lips, coating it with your slick. "All mine."

"Sí, Javi."

"That's right, corazón." He murmurs, slipping two digits into you. "I'm going to fuck you so good that you won't ever think about anyone else." He sets a pace pretty quickly, pumping his fingers in and out, curling them to hit all the right spots. "I'm the only man for you. Understand that?"

"Yes, shit-" you choke down a moan when he mildly pinches your nub. "You are."

He makes a satisfied noise before diving in your pussy, starting to lick and kiss your clit without pulling out his fingers, maintaining a relentless pace and rejoicing himself in the sounds he'd pull from you.

"Fuck, that's good..." you manage to say, knowing how he likes the praise, your hand messing up his hair.

Javier pulls away for a second, grabbing your thighs to part them further and place your legs over his shoulders eagerly, hungrily looking up at you. You arch your back, ever so responsive to him while struggling to maintain a hold of yourself.

"So pretty." He whispers, admiring how your chest goes up and down from your rag breathing, your face contorted by pleasure as his fingers disappear in your cunt, the squelching sounds of your pussy and the moans spilling from your lips making him painfully hard. "Toda mía."

Your legs were already shaking, your body being so sensitive and needy. Specially for him. Always for him. But it wasn't enough and you both knew that. Though before you can beg him for more, his mouth takes place were his digits used to be, eating you out as if you were his favorite meal, lapping you up kind of selfishly, almost like he did it for his own pleasure.

"Javi, that's-" you can't even form coherent sentences without being interrupted by your cries of pleasure. "Too fucking good."

His tongue is hot and soft between your folds, licking up your slit as he rubs tight circles on your clit, fucking you greedily and moaning graciously against your slickness. Also, the image of him between your legs was always a sight to see, adding to the pool of arousal. You start seeing white spots and the knot in your lower stomach starts to loosen as the orgasm approaches, gripping the leather seat as if your life depended on it. It's a good thing that he's holding you, cause in a matter of seconds your whole body starts to tremble and his name leaves your lips repeatedly.

"I can't- shit!" You pull his hair involuntarily and he groans in response, the sound vibrating through your core and pushing you to the edge. "I'm gonna..."

You can't even finish speaking before you're coming undone in his mouth, feeling the hot waves of satisfaction wash over you. He doesn't pull away until you're practically whining from the overstimulation, trying to regain composure as he licks you clean. When he does, his eyes peer at you, intoxicated with desire as he starts to stand on his feet, towering over you.

"I missed that sweet taste of yours." He licks his glistening lips and you wish he'd finally kiss you. "Can't get enough of it."

Your hands reach his belt, trying to unbuckle it, but he takes your wrists to stop you.

"What's wrong?" You question, genuinely confused.

"I'm taking you to my apartment. I'm doing this properly." He retorts. However, you're too turned on now to care about the place.

"Please Javi, let me do something for you." One thing that made him go stupidly insane for you was the way you were never coy when asking for his cock, looking up at him with pleading eyes. As if having him on your throat gratified you. "I need you."

He almost caved in. Almost.

"Stop that or I'll cuff you again." He grumbles, only making you smile.

"Do it. I don't need hands, I can always take you in my mou-" Javier flips your body abruptly, pressing your face against the seat, and you can hear the familiar sound of metal clipping in.

"Such a greedy slut." He fixes your dress, not without subtly smacking your ass beforehand.

"Mm, can I at least get my panties back?" You ask in defeat, turning to face him, but he was already shutting the door.

"No." He quickly starts the car as you settle on the back, catching a glimpse of your reflection in the mirror. Your cheeks were flushed and lips plump from biting them, eyes still sparkling from the high post-orgasm.

"Do you like me like this?" You wonder as he begins driving. "All fucked out, cuffed and ready for you to take?"

Peña doesn't answer immediately, not daring to look back at you but desperately wanting to do it.

"I do." He answers, eyes on the road. "I like you naked. And dressed too, specially with those pretty skirts. I like it when you tell me how your day was, or when you're reading quietly." His words make your heart flutter, blushing harder. "I like listening to your voice, and the way your gaze always seems interested whenever I talk about me. Shit, I even like you when you're ignoring me." You can almost hear his smile, if that made any sense. "I like you all the damn time, hermosa."

Honestly, you weren't expecting such a straightforward answer, finding yourself at loss of words. Nonetheless, you didn't need to say anything, cause sooner than expected you were being taken out of the truck, flashes of the building he resided in passed right in front of your eyes while he dragged you through the dark, silent halls.

"Javi..." despite having limited mobility, you lean towards him, whispering in his ear. "Please kiss me."

He laughs dryly at your plea and struggles to open the door. "You want that, huh? ¿Quieres que te bese?" Then he takes your arm to drag you in, closing the door behind him.

"Yes, mi amor. I missed you so fucking much." You stay close to him, your face nuzzled on the crook of his neck. His hand brushes the hair out of your face and he presses his lips to your temple.

"Hm, is that right?" He hums and you can feel it against your nose. "Didn't seem so."

You back off swiftly, keeping your eyes locked with his. "I'm sorry, Javier. I really am."

Something shifts in his gaze, a possessive, deep emotion takes over him and he decides to take you up on your previous proposition.

"Prove it." He commands, voice hoarse. "Show me how much you missed me." The idea of getting what you wanted pursed your lips in a mischievous smirk. "I'll kiss you afterwards if I'm convinced."

Instead of responding, you start peppering kisses all over his jaw and neck, going as far along his chest as the buttons of his shirt would allow you. He lazily unbuckles his belt and pants while you lower yourself to your knees in front of him, but doesn't bother to go any further. It was going to be difficult, though nothing you haven't done before, nearly forgetting the cuffs as you craved his taste.

You rub the side of your face on his stiff erection, feeling how hard and hot he was under the tight fabric of his jeans and a low groan scratches his throat. You mouth at it before taking the zip between your teeth and sliding it down, eyes peering up at him at the same time. Javier observes every move attentively, his cock twitching at the sight of your lust-drunken gaze, breath starting to become unsteady when you kiss and lick the head of his dick over the thin fabric of his boxers. You taste the precum throughout it, salty and good, before pulling down his underwear by lightly biting the elastic.

Your mouth waters at the view, jaw going slack even before taking him in your mouth. His girth slaps against his clothed belly, tip red and leaking, just as big as you remember. Shit, you really had missed him. Javier's hand tangles in your hair, running his fingers in between the locks lovingly. He gasps when you press your lips to the slit, kitten licking the top and starting to spread wet kisses all over his length, running your tongue along the shaft, his musky scent getting to your head quite fast. He loved how every time you were on your knees for him it felt like you adored him, as much as Javier did you.

And it was true. Knowing how good you made him feel satisfied your senses, every expression and single noise he'd make could turn you on and push you to edge so easily. The man was simply delightful.

“Fuck, sweetheart…” he sighs, caressing your cheekbone with his thumb when you finally suck him in. “That’s it, wrap those gorgeous lips around my cock. So pretty…”

He lets out a gruffly moan as you take him further, watching as he screws his eyes shut and throws his head back, the sound so divine that it immediately makes your pussy clench around nothing. Javier is thick. And it’s always so hard to get him all in your mouth, but this time you make a double effort. You run your tongue against the veins on the underside of his dick, enjoying the weight of it in you, the taste and the admirable sight of him coming undone while he tries his best not to start fucking your face without warning, laying his palms flat on the wall behind you.

“Shit- that’s…” he grumbles, head spinning from pleasure, unable to make up any thought or manifest anything into words. You start bobbing your head up and down his length, hollowing your cheeks to provide more warmth.

You’re dripping, feeling the slick run down your thighs and the ache becoming unbearable. You squeeze your legs together in order to release some of that need, letting out a whine that vibrates through him and makes his hips jolt into your mouth.

“Fucking hell…” Javier’s hand snakes to the back of your neck, massaging the soft skin. “Does it turn you on to get me off like this, hermosa?”

You hum in response and the feeling sends him to oblivion, letting out a coarse moan that shocks another wave of hotness between your legs.

“What a nasty girl you are.” He mumbles breathily, “My girl.” He’s practically shaking at this point, the head of his cock hitting the back of your throat and your nose pressed against his pubic bone.

Air wasn’t a necessity at the moment, your ears ringing and the corners of your eyes watering. He warned you he was close but you didn’t back out, letting him hold you for support. He gasps out a raspy ‘fuck’ when he releases, hips stuttering and back arching slightly as his cum hits your tongue. You pull apart just enough to lap at the tip while he rides it out, feeling him throb in your mouth while you savor him until he’s completely spent, soft moans barely audible.

You wait until he opens his eyes again, brown gaze meeting yours between shaky breaths. “Will you uncuff me now, agent?”

He huffs a laugh, tugging himself back in his jeans before helping you get up and taking the metal cuffs off. For a second, none of you say a thing, simply staring back at each other with a swirl of emotions between you. But then he says your name, merely a whisper that makes you crumble.

“Don’t do that, Peña.” You scold, turning your back to him and walking towards the couch, taking a seat and listening to the leather crack under your weight.

“What do you mean?” He turns to you, hands on his hips, pants unbuttoned and hair messy.

“When you say my name like you need me and give me those puppy-dog eyes, I actually believe that you want me for anything other than sex.” He seems disappointed, mostly on himself. “So can we just fuck and get this over with?”

“Is that what you think I…?” Javier shakes his head and follows your direction, but only observes from above. “It’s not like that.”

You take off the heels, your feet starting to hurt. “Then how is it?”

His hand goes to your chin, urging you to look up at him. “I’m not good with this… I screwed up back in Texas and I did it again with you.” You gulp, your hands tightly gripping your knees. “I don’t know how to handle this sort of things, and it’s been a while since I felt like this for anyone…”

He takes the jacket off and sits on the edge of his coffee table in front of the sofa, cupping your face in his hands.

“All I know is that every time we’re together, nothing else matters. Things feel right. But when you’re not with me… Shit. Life becomes insufrible. I can’t sleep, can’t think, fuck, I can’t even have sex!” He looks genuinely irritated. “Everything’s about you when you’re away. And I can’t tolerate to see you with anyone else. It’s like someone just took a shot at me.”

You inhale sharply, taking his hand in yours without breaking eye contact. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve came back to you.”

“Precisely. I tried not to be selfish and let you go, but I can’t. It hurts too much.” He pouts, as if the mere thought made him sick. “And you deserve better.”

Inevitably, you roll your eyes. “Don’t bullshit me, Peña.” He furrows his brows at your reply, his palm falling from your cheek to his lap. “That’s crap! You think you know what’s best for me?”

“Well shit, I’m sorry for trying to look out for you.” Javier snarls back.

“I don’t need you to do that, you idiot.” You grab his jaw, taking him by surprise. “I know what I want and I was straightforward about it,” His heart starts thumping against his ribs. “So, if you want me, take me. Cause if you don’t… Someone else might.”

Your statement stirs his pot and his expression shifts. “Fuck no. You’re mine and I’m yours. That’s how this is going to work.”

“Yeah?” He lets out a throaty growl and leans down towards you.

“Yeah.” His mustache tickles your upper lip when he crashes his lips to yours and you whine into his mouth.

It was desperate and demanding, ripping all the emotions from you. Javier tasted like cigarettes, a hint of mint and of you. And you tasted like tequila, honey and of him. His cologne was a little faded, but you could still smell it.

“Say you’re mine, corazón.” He mumbles when he pulls back for air, forehead pressed to yours. “I don’t care if you’re lying, I need to hear it.”

You take him by the collar of his shirt so that he’s sitting down next to you, snaking your hand to press the palm against his bare chest.

“Soy tuya, Javi.” You tell him, laying a small kiss to his lips. “I mean it.”

He smiles cheekily as he pulls you on top of him, spreading your knees to each side of his thighs, your dress slipping upwards. Javier tugs a strand of hair behind your ear and his fingers roam your face as if he wanted to memorize every edge of it by tact alone. His thumb sweeps over your bottom lip carefully, parting your lips briefly before going to kiss you again. This time he does it slowly, taking his time with your lips prior to sliding his tongue past your teeth and relishing on your taste, almost like he wanted to lose himself in you.

To him, the world meant nothing if you weren’t by his side. And now that you were here, he intended to make the most of it.

His hands are everywhere: your waist, hips, lower back and butt, grabbing every bit of your flesh that he could, keeping you close. So close that it almost seemed like he wished to merge into you. You made out for what it appeared to be hours, until the kisses got sloppier but never less passionate, and you started grinding against him. You hold his shoulders for support, creating that delicious friction between your naked cunt and his stiff boner tucked in his pants. He jolts his hips up, making you release a whimper in his mouth.

He backed off, his lips now scrape your jawline, neck and collarbones. You arch your back when his hand slithers to pull down the zipper of your dress, granting him a better view of your tits close to his face.

“My room?” He asks, biting your earlobe mildly.

“Thought you’d never ask.”

Javi carries you to the bedroom with your legs wrapped around his waist, still finding a way to keep his lips on you in the meantime. Clothes disappear in the blink of an eye and you sit at the end of the sheets to help him take off his pants, kissing his abdomen, your dress now discarded somewhere on the floor.

“Eres preciosa.” The way he says it makes you blush, skin burning under his chocolate gaze. “I’m all yours, mi amor.”

You bring his face close to yours, infatuated with his beauty. “All mine…”

“Yes, corazón.”

You lay down on the mattress, Javier starting to play with your hard nipples, nibbling at them, sucking and kissing with his attention focused on all your reactions. You’re so aroused that you’re quite literally dripping into his sheets, legs trembling from every light stimulation and skin scorching from desire, already spurred on by the make out and giving him head.

“Please, Javi… I- need you inside.”

He wastes no time to compel, maneuvering a hand to your lower back and aligning himself to your entrance, keeping your legs spread. You feel him inside, splitting you open with no previous warning and the tight grip of your cunt feels like homecoming to him. You hold your breath until he bottoms out, enjoying the sweet stretch he provided. Then your whole body quivers, a sheen layer of sweat covering both his golden skin and yours, a couple of curly locks sticking to his temples from it.

You watch him from below through hooded eyes, every inch of him inside you making you feel so full and complete, the outline of his fingers dig in your waist to keep you angled. You bear down on his cock, enveloping him in the warm, welcoming grasp of your body. He holds your hand above your head and leans down to kiss you again, drowning his own moans in your mouth as he draws out slowly to set a pace with his hips, the wet sounds of you pussy and skin clapping against skin sending a thrill of excitement down his spine.

You get it then, as he pours out all sentiment into you, overcome by passion. He is yours. Even though he just said it, only now does it become evident to you. This is Javier’s way of proving it.

He grabs one of your thighs and lifts your knee to the crook of his elbow, the new angle spreading you further open and allowing him to hit deeper. The impact of his tip hitting every right spot relentlessly forces you to break apart from his lips, your head thrown back into his pillows while practically screaming for more, his face nuzzled in your chest as he melts into you.

“Shit baby, I won’t last.” He warns, sinking his teeth to leave a mark between your breasts. You can feel it too, hot shots of ecstasy creeping up the pit of your stomach every time his cock jumps inside you.

You tug at his hair, a strangled moan escaping his lips. “Do it in me- Please, fill me up.”

Your request sends him right to the edge, his thrusts becoming careless as he starts grinding into you, Javi’s fingers quickly finding your swollen clit. The sole touch made you writhe and reach your high in absolute bliss, clenching your walls around him and crying out from raw pleasure. He fucks you through it, overwhelmed by the sensation. You feel dizzy, barely conscious when he finds his own release, your name spilling from his lips like it was the only word he knew, coming in warm spurts inside you. His spend is dripping from your pussy and thighs when he pulls out and sits up to admire the absolute mess he just made of you.

“Well…” he says, guiding his finger to push his seed back into you, making you whine from the overstimulation. “Hope that made it clear.”

You smile, every muscle in your body weeping from exhaustion. “Yeah… I’ll have to make you jealous more often.”

He groans in annoyance and you pull him back on top of you, spreading tender kisses all over his face, laughing in the meantime.

“Not funny.” He grumbles, despite the grin forming on his lips. Javier rolls to your side, coming to lay down next to you and immediately holding you against his sturdy chest, wrapping his arms around your waist to spoon you. “Stay with me.”

His plead is barely a murmur that filters through your ears and you’re too tired to figure out what those words actually mean. You simply let your eyelids drop and retort with a hardly audible ‘always’.

#javier peña #javier pena x reader #javier pena narcos #javier pena x you #javier pena one shot #javier pena x y/n #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena smut #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction

[skzdarlings]

i do ; skz ; felix x reader

requested by anonymous: ' I would love if you could use these prompts...on Felix x fem reader:❛ i love that no one else has seen you like this, that no one else has felt you before, been inside you. they don't get to have you, but i do. ❜❛ you're mine. you've always been mine. ❜I love possessive Felix, istg i would give amything to have him' plus two anonymous requests for: 'i'd say you need someone to put you in your place' for felix.

pairing: lee felix/reader content info: look this request was for possessive!felix and so possessive!felix i delivered. he is a little weirdo in this tbh. but i think after all my anti-rich-guy stories, i have earned the right for one problematic possessive mafia boss who throws his money and his dick around hahaha. so yes, possessive!felix, virgin!reader, wedding night, arranged marriage, felix being a criminal boss, insta-love. reader's backstory involves a verbally abusive/neglectful family. explicit sexual content. word count: 4000 words.

masterlist. part of the valentine’s day stories series. credit to prompts. requests are closed.

enjoy <3

-

Your new husband is astoundingly pretty.   You expected a different face to be waiting at the end of the wedding aisle: harsh, old, scarred.  Maybe, if you let yourself fantasize, he would be handsome in a rugged way. 

You were not expecting Felix.  Slender, delicate Felix with his high cheekbones and freckles, his dark eyes and feather-soft blonde hair.  He smiled a dimpled smile as your father surrendered your hand. 

That surrender was a visual representation of a literal transaction.  You were a bartering tool to save your father’s business.  You knew an arranged marriage was inevitable when a few trades went sour and the company went bankrupt.  The family could only maintain relevancy and safety through a match to someone more powerful. 

Lee Felix is the heir to a very dirty criminal syndicate that blends in high society.  Everyone knows their money is blood-spattered, but they throw a good party and the jewels sparkle the same.

You knew his name long before the wedding.  Of course you knew his name.  But you did not know his face.  You expected a devil, not a vision of divinity, resplendent in white and gold. 

Your heart has not stopped racing since he first lifted your veil and kissed you with lips softer and gentler than your grandest fantasies. 

Now you are perched on a lavish bed in a beautiful penthouse suite.  The walls are windows, externally tinted but offering you a glorious view of the glittering cityscape at night.  You wonder how much of the city your new husband owns. 

Would that be an impertinent question?  It is not as though there is any real charade to play; this is not a love match and there is no sense pretending otherwise.  Enquiring after financial assets is arguably appropriate insofar as business goes. 

Then the door opens and your new husband enters.  All thoughts of business flitter into nothing, an insignificant detail next to your wedding night.  A night with this powerful and beautiful stranger.

“Are you nervous?” he asks in a voice so deep it keeps surprising you.  It suits his angelic appearance in a way, something so captivating about its low tones, effortlessly melodic.  But that melody is coloured darkly in its depth, scratching a shiver up your spine.  When he speaks, it feels like he is trailing his fingers up your back in a curious, searching touch. 

He looks at you with as much depth, dark eyes penetrating as he circles the bed.  He has been nothing but polite, but you can’t help but feel like prey being circled by a predator. 

Even more concerning, you can’t help but like it.  Since the moment he took your hand, his eyes have not left you.  It is almost overwhelming.  You have been invisible your whole life.  No one ever looked at you.  No one ever wanted you.  Your father scared off anyone who tried. 

Felix is not just anyone.  Anyone sensible would be scared of him.

You are also not just anyone. 

“No,” you answer.

“Really?”  He lifts a curious eyebrow. 

You are both in your wedding clothes, all white and gold.  Your veil is draped over a chair in the corner.  He puts his coat there too. 

He never looks away from you, rolling his shirtsleeves up his forearms as he approaches the bed.

“May I ask, why not?” he asks.  It’s a funny question, so polite but only posed because he knows his own reputation.  He knows what you must think of him.  The bloodshed, the ruthlessness, the merciless command he holds over his family’s legacy.  He might look unassuming, but he is not to be trifled with.  That gentle exterior could be unnerving to some people, even more than an outward brute. 

But you have dealt with those brutes your whole life.  An abusive father, cruel brother, an uncaring mother.  Hurt, neglected, ignored. 

Tonight, while you circled the reception to greet everyone, your father and brother pulled you aside.  Your mother had already berated you on the details of your appearance, but they were reprimanding you for every other misstep.

You almost burst into tears, tired and frightened.  You were so afraid you would never escape them.  Even at your wedding, on the cusp of a new life, they were dragging you around, kicking and screaming.

Then you felt a tap on your shoulder.  Bang Chan, one of Felix’s most trusted agents, stood there with a forced but cordial smile.  He looked at you and not your family. 

“Sorry to interrupt,” he said.  “Your husband is asking for you.  Please, come with me.”

Your father sputtered indignantly, unaccustomed to such blatant disrespect for his authority.  Chan said nothing to him, simply offered you his arm.  He also opened his jacket to flash the gun in his chest holster.  Your family had their weapons stripped before entering the reception.  It was a subtle reminder of who was really in charge. 

So your father and brother were left sputtering helplessly as Chan escorted you across the room.  Felix was sitting with some of his men, smiling his bright smile and looking like any happy young groom. 

That sunny face faltered when he saw your morose expression.  His glance passed to your family, a flicker of anger in his gaze.  Then he smiled at you and held out a welcoming arm. 

“Come here,” he said.  “Sit with me a bit.  Please.” That deep voice.  You felt it like a touch inside you. He had recited the scripted vows earlier.  This invitation was his first real address. 

You nodded.  Your legs were shaky from the confrontation, never mind the wobble from your heels.  Your feet hurt.  Sitting would be a relief if nothing else. 

There was an empty seat behind Felix.  It was the type of seat you were usually given: at the back where you could be forgotten. 

Once you were within reach, Felix grabbed you around the waist.  Your breath caught as you stumbled towards him.  He caught you and held you.  Then you were sitting in his lap, your dress draped everywhere, a glittering ivory prize perched safe and pretty on his knee.  He wrapped a possessive arm around your middle. 

It was more than a power play.  It was one thing to put you on his lap and show your family that he owned you now, but it was another for him to frown as he touched the painfully tight pearl belt around your waist. 

“Why is this so tight?” he asked, looking at you with concern.     

“I’m sorry,” you said automatically, in the habit of grovelling whenever someone took a disappointed tone.  “My mother,” you spoke softly, not wanting the rest of the table to hear. 

He leaned closer to you, offering you his ear directly.  A whisper was all you managed, unaccustomed to such attention.

“They’re real pearls,” you whispered.  “Very expensive.  Very fine.  Too fine for me.  My mother had the belt made small so I would remember to act worthy of them.  Sit straight.  Not over-eat.  You know.”

He frowned, his brow furrowing.  Instinct compelled you to soothe that displeasure, laughing like you were not upset.

“It’s all right,” you said.  “She’s right.  They are very fine pearls.”

“It’s not all right,” Felix said.  He looked at you, held your gaze in his own.  You found yourself counting his freckles.  “Do you like it?” he asked. 

Maybe it was his display of power.  Maybe it was his arm around you.  Maybe it was the freckles.  He looked so sweet, so sincere.  You could not bring yourself to lie.  Though you had defended your cruel family all your life, the truth fell from your lips in a rough exhale. 

“No.”  You felt tears in your eyes.  “I know it’s expensive.  I know it’s beautiful.  But I’ve never hated anything more.” 

He held your gaze, your watery eyes in the dark depths of his own.

Then he grabbed the belt by a thin material strand and yanked.  A couple pearls popped right off and scattered.  The rest dangled on the belt, an absurd amount of wealth in his hand. 

Felix tossed it over his shoulder like it was garbage. Then he wrapped his arm around your waist and held you against him. 

You chanced a look at your family.  They were scandalized.  Horrified.  And you breathed easier for the first time in a long time. You have long suffered the oppressive strangle of control masquerading as love.  His protective arm felt nothing like that pearl belt.

So you look at him now.  You strive to articulate all these feelings.  You are not used to speaking and having someone listen. 

“I can’t explain it,” you say.  “Maybe it’s foolish.  But I… I just feel like I was meant to be here.  With you.  Like this.”

Your heart jumps at his expression, a luminous pleasure that brightens this dimly lit room. 

“That’s funny,” he says.  “I feel the same way.”

You swallow as he sits beside you.  Slowly, touch by touch, breath by breath, he is bringing your bodies together.  His knee touches yours, his arm your arm.  He folds his hands in his lap but he is close enough you can count his freckles again. 

“I need to be honest with you,” he says.  “I’ve wanted you since I first saw you.  A year ago.  At the winter masquerade.”

You look at him with surprise.  All at once, his eyes come back to you, gazing at you behind a golden bird mask at the annual winter social.  You couldn’t place the handsome stranger at the time.  His hair was dark then, his face in a mask.  He did not speak.  His distinctive voice would have given him away. 

He danced one dance with you, the only person who danced with you all night.  You were later reprimanded for behaving like a slut, even though he touched your waist and nothing more.

“You were very kind,” he says.  “I watched you with the staff.  You were the only one in that whole room to say please and thank you to them – did you know that?”  He sighs and looks away, thoughts travelling beyond this room.  “I came from nothing,” he says.  “My family… we fought to get where we are now.  But I remember, you know.  What it feels like to be the smallest and least important person in the room.”

You sit straighter when he looks at you.  Oh, your heart has not slowed its thunder.  Excitement and affection swirl together in a motley tempest of sensation, touched by his words and yearning for more.  You thought you had been sold to an uncaring bidder, but Felix touches you slowly, like he would a very fine work of art.  His knuckles caress your cheek, the slope of your jaw. 

“I thought…” He looks at you reverently.  “I thought… I would do anything to preserve that goodness.  I would protect it.  Like your family wasn’t.”  His brow furrows now, a shadow of his face.  “They would have ruined you.” 

His hand continues, knuckles skimming down your throat, your shoulder, your arm.  You shiver.   He has a terrible scar, scoring the whole back of his hand.  A stark difference to your unblemished hand, your manicured nails against his calloused fingers. 

He says, “I know what it’s like to be ruined.”

You look from your hands to his face, his handsome profile, the slope of his nose and his soft lips.  He is still looking at your joined hands. 

“I wasn’t always like this,” he says.  “I’d give anything to have my innocence back.  But I can’t.”

He lifts your hand, cradles it between both of his like something precious.  Your breath catches when he kisses your palm, lips soft against your skin.  

“So I told myself, I would do anything to save yours,” he says.  He looks almost… afraid.  An expression you never expected to see on this man.   “So I destroyed your father’s business,” he says.  “It was all me.  I knew he would never give you to a man like me unless he had no choice.  He would have given you away to one of his friends and they would have broken you.  But you were already mine.  So I left him no choice but to see things my way.” 

“Oh,” you say, surprised beyond all words. 

“I wanted you to know before anything… happens… between us,” he says.  “But I understand if your feeling are complicated.  Or if you… fear me.”

Your father has often boasted how many men fear him.  It does not sound like a boast from Felix, rather something lamentable.  His face is shadowed in shame. 

“My feelings are not complicated,” you say.  He is still holding your hand in both of his.  You lay your other hand there, a complete joining. 

He meets your gaze, an intense and imploring stare.

“I’m not my father’s daughter anymore,” you say.  “I’m my husband’s wife.  My loyalty is to you.  My place is with you.”

“Yes,” he says, spoken on a breath.  His smile returns.  “Your place.  I’d say you need someone to put you in your place.  Your rightful place.” 

He springs off the bed like there is lightning under his feet.  He is all smiles and sunlight again, a beacon in the blue dark of this room.  You cannot help but bask in his warmth, bereft in the chill when he leaves your side. 

He takes something from his discarded coat pocket, a case swathed in velvet, soft to the touch.  You hold it, admiring the texture.

He kneels behind you on the bed while you open it.   Inside is the most breathtaking necklace you have ever seen in your life.  When you lift it, the chain is long, designed to sit low, loose around your neck.  No more chokers.  No more pearls. 

“Oh, Felix,” you say, breathless and amazed, then very embarrassed.  You are not used to such lovely gifts.  Even the pearls were a punishment.  “I can’t accept this…” you say, stunned.

“You can,” he says. 

He takes the clasp then strings the necklace around you.  His fingers on the nape of your neck have you shivering.  The necklace clasps in place, then his lips are on your neck, a chaste press that nonetheless lights fire under your skin.  “It was made for you,” he says.  “Like you were made for me.” 

He takes the zipper of your gown between two careful fingers, so slowly lowering it.  It feels like you are unravelling with it.  The zipper reaches the base of your spine and his fingertips dance across your bare skin. 

He steps off the bed.  He looks down at you, his eyes intense but his smile soft.  He touches your cheek, strokes his thumb across it lovingly. 

Then he is sinking to his knees in front of you.  You already feel weak as jelly, but your whole body goes soft and pliant when he gently grasps your ankle, when he slides your painful shoe off your foot and tosses it aside.  He somehow finds every sore spot and rubs it better. 

“This is how it works,” he says.  He is on his knees but somehow his presence looms bigger than you.  You cannot look away from the thrall of his gaze.  “You are my wife.  And when we are out there, I am your servant.”  He takes your other foot and removes that shoe as well.  He massages you gently.  “I will never deny you anything,” he says.  “You can ask me for anything. All right?  I will give you the whole world.  I will give you my whole heart.  In return, I only want one thing.”

“What’s that?” you ask, already breathless.

“I am your husband,” he says, “and in here, you are my servant.  Only I can touch you.  Only I will have you.  All of you.  In every way.  Always, starting from today.  Starting from right now.”    

“Yes.  Yes.  But I – I’ve never done this before,” you say, aching to surrender but fearful he will regret this.  Though you are knowledgeable, you are lacking in experience from years of isolation.  “I’ve been alone for so long,” you say.  “I don’t want to disappoint you.” 

“You don’t,” he says.  He lifts your leg, swoops down to kiss your calf, then higher: your knee, your thigh.  “You could never,” he says, guiding your leg to rest on his shoulder.  He gathers the volume of your wedding dress in his hands and pushes it up, up. 

You almost forget to breathe.  He kisses higher on your thigh.  Then he grabs the thin material of your white tights and rips them open.

“You’re mine,” he says.  “You’ve always been mine.” 

You fall back on your elbows, limbs already quivering as he tears through your underclothes as if impatiently ripping open a prettily wrapped gift.   With your expensive lace panties shredded and your tights in tatters, he pushes your skirts up and out of his way.  You hold them while he kisses up your thigh.  He runs his tongue along the seam between your thigh and somewhere much more sensitive. 

“No one else has done this to you?” he asks.  He already looks flushed.  Desperate.      

“No,” you answer.  You swallow hard.  “Never.”  You know some men do not enjoy providing this type of pleasure to their wives, so you are about to tell him that you have no expectations in that regard—

But then he is on you like a starving man, eyes closed and mouth open and licking through all that wet desire.  You fall on your back, pressing your heel into his back.  He groans, pressing deeper, tongue seeking, swiping, stroking. 

He grips your thighs possessively, holding you in place as he ravages you with his mouth.  He takes you up and over a blissful crest.  It leaves you a drenched and panting mess. 

He stands, wiping his arm across his wet mouth.  He does not look satisfied, eyes still hungry as he climbs on top of you. 

“My wife,” he says, like the word is sacred and impossible, like he thought a man like him could never say it.  “All mine,” he says, running his hands up your thighs, up your waist, touching every inch of you until he is cradling your face delicately in his careful but calloused hands.   

It makes your whole body clench up tightly, your breath stuttering as he kisses you.  You melt into the kiss, so different from the chaste peck of your ceremony.  It is a claiming kiss, the taste of you still on his lips, his moan in your mouth, his chest against yours as those sounds of pleasure rumble through him. 

He tugs down your bodice, then he is ripping through your underclothes again.   When your bodice is around your waist and your chest is bare except for his necklace, you find yourself covering your breasts instinctively.  He takes your hands, not forcefully but firmly, holding your gaze.  His mouth is already so pink and raw from kissing.  You wonder if you look as ravished.  Maybe more.  It makes you whimper, surrendering when he pins your hands on either side of your head. 

“This is mine,” he says, kissing your jaw, your throat, then lower.  “All mine, sweetheart.”

He wraps his lips around a pointed nipple and you feel the reaction between your legs, as if connected by a thread.  Your legs try to close around his hips but he presses down.  The crumpled skirt of your dress is between you, but he feels your thighs clenching, feels you desperately bucking. 

Even his chuckle is a deep sound.  He smiles at you, batting his eyelashes as he licks the curve of your breast.  Your whole body twitches again. 

“Mm,” he says.  “You feel that?  You getting all tight… and hot… just for me…”

“Felix,” you say, you beg.

He sits back on his heels to get your wedding dress off.  It is a flurry of ivory and silk, earning some laughter, then it is gone and your husband is staring down at you.   Again, you feel like prey, like a meal spread out helplessly for some predatory creature.  Again, you like it. 

He is just as impatient with his own clothes.  He does not look away from you while tearing his shirt open.  Buttons fly, forgotten, and he rips the material down his arms and off.  His belt is next, leather whistling through the air then joining the heap on the floor.  He grabs your hand and guides it to the hard shape in his white pants, groaning deep in his chest as your palm curves around it. 

You are so captivated him, by the way he feels, by the sounds he makes, that you are surprised when he touches you too.  Your legs part instinctively, then your thighs twitch to close when you are embarrassed by your eagerness. 

“Don’t be shy,” he says.  “Not with me.” His fingers feel divine inside you, gliding as if through silk, pressing at your walls and making you whimper.  “Yeah, my baby.  So nice… ‘n wet… for me…” he murmurs, more to himself than you. It still makes you clench, like your body wants him deeper, pulling tight around him.   “God.  Perfect.” 

“Aren’t we g-gonna—”  Your eyes drop to his waistband, then up to his eyes again. 

He smiles, laughs, and withdraws his fingers slowly. 

“Oh yeah, sweetheart,” he says, unbuttoning his pants.  “We are.  Be patient.  You’re gonna enjoy this.  Gonna remember this night forever.”  He leans down so his body is over yours.  He kisses you, presses you into the pillows.  When he pulls back, he traces a finger along the necklace, smiling brightly. “The first time I made you mine,” he says, speaking low and soft against your lips.   “I’m going to do everything with you,” he says.  “And you’re gonna want it.  All of it and more.” 

He has you begging for more already.  When he finally is pushing inside you, after so much torturous build-up, you are a breathless, sweaty tangle of limbs.  It feels like he is pinning you to the mattress, taking you so deep and so hard, like your whole body is changing to fit him.   There is a long, slow burn, but you are so wet and he is so careful; it is an ache that gives way to pleasure. 

His arms are around you, holding him above you, making you feel so completely shielded and enveloped.  He starts a slow pace that turns more frantic.  Your hands move all over his chest and shoulders to find a grip. 

“I love that no one else has seen you like this,” he says, grabbing your searching hand.  He brings it to his mouth, kisses your palm, your fingers.  He puts your hand on his shoulder, then he slides his hand under your head to cup your neck, holding you steady while he rolls his hips into yours.  “That no one else has felt you before,” he says.  “Been inside you. They don't get to have you, but I do.“

“Yes,” you say.  “Always.  My husband.” 

“Mm.”  He drops his forehead to yours.  “My wife.” 

You come again but it feels different, starting deep inside you and rolling outward, a full-body spasm that has you crying out his name.  He comes too, holding you against him, his lips on your neck as he says your name. 

Then he kisses you.  Then he lays you down.  He wraps you in his arms and squeezes. 

“Sleep for now,” he says.  “It’s been a long day.  And I want you again.”

“You have me,” you say, nestling in his arms, your head under his chin. 

“Yes,” he says with a smile.  He looks so sweet even while his wicked hands hold your body in a strong, possessive grip.  “I do.”      

#lee felix x reader #felix x reader #lee felix smut #felix smut #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz smut #stray kids smut #lee felix x you #felix x you #valentinesdaystories

[halfrican-heat]

ALL MINE (Ony)

"You come here, I'll knock your pussy out the damn frame. Remember the last time I made you miss your damn plane? Remember the last time I wet you down with champagne?"

A/N: Hey! I'm down bad for this man rn, lol. I've got lots of ideas for him though, so yay! Happy reading :) Inspired by @lingeriae and this post! Requests are open, too! Get at your girl.

Warning(s): Explicit Sexual Content; Penetrative Sex (p in v), Oral Sex (F receiving), Cursing, Public Sex (Outdoors), Cervix kissing, Wedding details, N Word Used, Black reader in mind, AAVE/Dialogue with Dialect, Dominant!Ony (when tf is he not in my mind), Depiction of marijuana usage, Depictions of alcohol consumption, Mild Dubious Consent; Beta'd by my besties <3

Pairing: Ony x Wedding Planner!Reader

Song Inspo: All Mine - Brent Faiyaz

His eyes drilled into the side of your head, trailing the curves of your body.

As maid of honor, your dress was a little different from the other bridesmaids. Make no mistake, your girls looked good with a t on the end. You made sure of that, but you all agreed upon something more…tailored for the lady making the most moves. So, your dress was designed to your tastes and fit you like a glove. It accentuated all your assets and Onyankopon was taking stock. 

The two of you had only fucked once but there was this heightened tension ever since.

During the entire wedding process, Ony had been a pain in your ass. Because he was the best man, the two of you had to collaborate on many of the joint events-- like the Engagement Party and Bridal Party mixers. He was a terrible flirt and spent most of his time trying to get in your pants. Then, if it wasn’t you, he was flirting with any lady he could. And they would swoon just as soon as Ony flashed that handsome, megawatt smile of his. 

But for some reason, Ony liked the challenge you posed. The way you were resistant to his charms. Unfortunately for you, Ony was interested in you. He liked you.

You dealt with his bullshit for a good while, putting in a valiant effort because you were doing your best friend and fellow soror, Kendra, a favor. Y’all went back to diapers and stuck together through everything. You were a celebrity event coordinator, specializing in weddings, so you were doing double duty by being her maid of honor and planning the entire wedding. But shit hit the fan between you and Ony the night of the final Bridal Party mixer. The two of you got into a huge blowout fight that ended with your cute little cocktail dress torn and strewn about the floor of Ony’s hotel room, his tongue licking champagne from places it shouldn’t have been. 

“You doing so good, ma.” He had whispered, fucking you into his sheets. 

You ended up missing your damn plane the next morning. Needless to say, he moved up on your list of people you wouldn’t mind spending time with. But he quickly moved back down the list after he ghosted you the next day. During the rehearsal dinner, you found him talking up some girl in the hotel lounge. He made eye contact with you as he flirted with her, looking away to give her his full attention. 

So, you kept it cordial and cute after that. You acted like it didn’t bother you. Did he have amazing, life-changing dick that made you want to murder him and the bitch from the hotel lounge? Yes, yes he did. But were you a classy, sophisticated bitch who successfully planned a destination wedding while being the maid of honor and dealing with Ony’s shiesty ass? Yes, yes the fuck you were. 

And no nigga was gonna make you second guess that shit. 

The “Lounge Incident”, as your friends lovingly dubbed it, had happened a week ago. Fast forward to the present and there you were, watching your best friend dance and act a fool with the love of her life. You were happy for her, of course, but it did make you feel a little wistful.

The wedding ceremony wrapped up two hours prior and you found yourself nursing a glass of champagne at the reception. You were pretending to be unfazed by the looks Ony was sending you from across the room. You stole a glance at him when you felt like he wasn’t watching you and…dear Lord. 

His white dress shirt was tucked into his green slacks, suit jacket long forgotten, with a few of the top buttons opened. His gold chain shined at you, almost winking, as it matched the gold Rollie on his wrist. He flashed a smile to one of his homeboys and you felt your knees wobble a little. You looked away quickly and crossed the room to find your girls. They were standing around one of the reception tables talking.

“Aht, don’t bring that energy over here, ma’am!” Your friend, Chelsea, said. “That man look like he ‘bout to jump your ass.”

“Please tell me y’all not about to fuck at this wedding,” Liyah groaned.

Your girls laughed loudly and you hid a smile behind your champagne glass as you took a sip. You risked a glance back at Ony, finding his gaze already on you. He didn’t care to hide the fact he was staring at you, not even giving the young lady in front of him a glance as she spoke to him. You whipped around, clearing your throat. 

“Bye, girl. It ain’t even like that.”

The table went quiet, all the girls looking over your shoulder. A shit-eating grin spread across Chelsea’s face as she raised her hand, waving playfully. 

“Hey, Ony.”

Your eyes widened as his chest pressed against your back, his warmth surrounding you. You tried to pretend to be unbothered as your friends gawked with wide eyes and smirks. 

“Hey, ladies.”

The smile was evident in his voice, sending chills down your spine. But you took a sip of your champagne with a neutral face, not acknowledging him. In truth, you didn’t need to. He leaned down so that his mouth was close to your ear, hands braced on the table as he trapped you against his chest. His chain brushed your neck, not helping the goosebumps erupting all over your skin. His words, low so only you could hear them, didn’t help either. 

“Say bye to your lil friends so I can eat your pussy.”

He paused as you turned your head slightly, your faces close to touching. 

“And stop playing with me.”

His eyebrow arched at you as he pulled back, taking a sip from his whiskey glass. He addressed your friends again, setting the glass down. 

“Ladies,” He said with a charming smile. 

With that, he left you standing there as you slowly looked back to your friends who gaped back at you. 

“Bye.” You said finally, scurrying from the reception hall as fast as your legs would carry you.

You found Ony outside the building, perched against the wall. A blunt hung from his lips as he gazed at you sidelong. You approached slowly, hips swaying with each step. His eyes never left yours as he sparked up and inhaled, exhaling the smoke slowly. You felt dizzy with need but you weren’t down that bad. Not yet. 

You took the blunt as he passed it to you. You let the smoke soothe you before you exhaled. You took a few more pulls before passing it back to him. 

“Take your panties off,” He said finally, after a long draw. 

You tutted, crossing your arms. 

“You just gon’ act like you ain’t ghost me, Ony?”

“I was wrong for that. But I'm here now, ain't it?” He said casually. 

You rolled your eyes, turning to go back inside. He grabbed your arm and pulled you back to him, his lips pressing firmly against yours. His mouth teased yours, opening it as smoke billowed between the two of you. His arm slid down to your waist as you exhaled the smoke he gave you. 

He took another pull, exhaling, before he looked back down at you. 

“I told you stop playing with me.”

“Maybe I'm done with you," You bluffed. "Maybe I got me another nigga to fuck on now.”

Ony scoffed, tucking the rest of his blunt away for later.

“Aight, that’s enough of that shit,” He mumbled, grabbing your hand as he pulled you to the side of the building. 

It was a more hidden spot, behind large bushes that wrapped around the front of the building and off to the side. From there, you could see guests entering and exiting but they couldn’t see you unless they were looking hard enough. Your eyes widened as he kneeled in front of you and shoved your dress up your legs. You swatted at his hands, panicking as your eyes darted around. Ony stilled, his gaze hard as he grabbed your hands and looked up at you.

“Don’t piss me off.”

Now, you were down bad. 

You took a shaky breath as he released your hands, going back to bunching up your dress. 

“Hold that,” He said, tossing your leg over his shoulder. 

You did as he asked, taking the garment in your hands. Your body flushed with heat as he shamelessly nuzzled his nose against your soaked core, smelling your needy scent. He kissed your clothed core and pushed your panties aside, holding them in one hand as he slipped a finger into your dripping cunt. He moved the digit in and out, brushing against that soft spot inside you. 

“Oh, fuck,” You whined, your head falling against the wall. 

“Yeah, say that shit you was sayin’ now,” Ony taunted, sliding another digit inside. “This pussy all mine.”

You panted, bracing yourself with a hand on his shoulder, as you forced out your next question.

“What about that bitch from the lounge, Ony?”

“I was gonna try what she was offering, but she wasn’t you,” He said easily, his eyes glued to his fingers moving in and out of you. “Damn, ma. You sucking that shit in.”

“Ony,” You whimpered. “I don’t want to play no games with you--”

“I’m not. That shit not an offer to me when you’re around,” He said firmly. “Now, you gon’ keep complainin’ or you gonna let daddy eat his pussy?”

“Ony--”

Any rebuttal you had became a wanton moan as he didn’t wait for a response, his mouth descending on your clit as his fingers continued to move inside you. You covered your mouth with your hand, trying in vain to stifle the sounds of pleasure he was snatching from you. He pulled his fingers from you gently, spreading your sopping pussy wider as he fucked his tongue in and out of you. 

He ate you out messily, drinking up your juices like sweet nectar. The slurping noises were lewd as he sucked on your clit, teasing it with his tongue before dipping it back into your weeping hole. His performance was drawing pathetic whines from your throat as you tried to keep the two of you from getting caught. Heat pooled in your belly as his mouth on your core drove you toward a heated finish. 

Then, he stopped completely. You let out a confused moan as the pleasure waned, your orgasm evading you. The confusion didn’t last long, however, as you heard his belt coming undone. He pulled himself from his pants as he tore your panties. He hiked your leg around his waist and slid home without warning.

“Hold on to me,” He grunted, his other hand supporting your back.

You wrapped your arms around him, your head resting on his shoulder as he thrust into you. His pace was rough and deep, fucking you like he owned you. Maybe he did. Maybe you wanted him to. You muffled a scream into his shoulder as his length kissed your cervix, unrelenting as the drag of his cock against your tight walls sent you into oblivion.

“Fuck, baby,” He groaned. “You so tight f’me. Takin’ me so good.”

You choked back a sob as his tip brushed that soft spongy spot, bringing back the pool of pleasure from before. Ony noticed your reaction, angling his hips to hit it over and over again. Your whimpers and moans were his own private mixtape as you keened and cried in his ear. He stretched you so good, the feeling of being this full something new and foreign to you. Ony was a bad habit, and he was making sure you wouldn’t be able to kick him any time soon.

That pool of pleasure warmed further with each snap of his hips into yours. Your quiet, open-mouthed cries built in intensity as the temperature inside you began to rise, swirling like a tsunami. You felt yourself teetering on that delicate edge and so could Ony. He picked up the pace. 

“You gonna cum on your dick?” He taunted, egging you on. “You gon’ show me who this dick belong to?”

Your climax crashed over you as you slapped a hand to your mouth, muffling the sob that broke free. He fucked you through your orgasm, prolonging it as your body seized around him. He could barely pull out, opting for shallow thrusts as you came down from your high.

You sagged against the wall, trying to catch your breath as Ony pulled out. He fixed your dress and smoothed it down around the hips. He tucked himself back into his pants and dug his wallet from his pocket, fishing out his room key. 

He flashed it in front of your dazed face before placing it in your hand. He pulled you off the wall, making sure you looked good before nudging you in the direction of the front doors. 

“Go to my room. Third floor, 303. I’ll be there in a minute.”

You looked down at the key card in your hand then back to him. He sparked up his blunt again, blowing out smoke as he smacked your ass. 

“Go ‘head, ma. I’m coming.”

You jumped slightly from the impact and found your feet moving you out of the bushes. You stumbled back into the hotel lobby, walking on wobbly legs to the elevators with his room key clutched in your hand. Your girl, Chelsea, was coming from the restrooms as the two of you made eye-contact. She smirked, her eyes trailing over you. She subtly adjusted the top of her dress, nodding at you.

You took the hint, fixing yours. 

She went back into the reception hall without a word as you fumbled to press the elevator button. 

Your night was not over yet.

#onyankopon x reader #onyankopon x black y/n #ony x reader #onyankopon smut #onyankopon x black reader #onyankopon #aot onyankopon #black writer #black reader #my writing #Lyv's Library #Ony's Observatory #Fanfiction for black women #Black women #smut #Onyankopon x black!reader #Potential Series ;) #Wedding Planner!Reader

[antiquatedplumbobs]

The Soddy

A CC Free Prairie Homestead

Lot size: 40x30 Price: §37,341 Lot type: Residential Location: Biscuit's Bastion, Chestnut Ridge

Homesteading and the settlement of the American west has always been a particular interest of mine and recently I've become very interested in sod houses! I toyed with the idea of recreating one in Sims but never had a good world or assets to work with. When I fell into my little building bender a few weeks ago I realized Chestnut Ridge was perfect for it and promptly hyperfixated.

This home is ideal for a couple or small family just trying to make their way in the prairie of Chestnut Ridge. The house can fit up to three sims and a baby or toddler, perhaps a bit snug for our modern standards but perfectly alright for the nineteenth century. Also comes complete with fertile fields, an empty chicken coop, a slightly decrepit horse barn, and a well stocked root cellar.

More info and download under the cut:

This house is heavily inspired by Prairie Homestead in South Dakota. When I started kicking around the idea of this build I started googling for reference photos and discovered this very cool historic site. I tried to match this build to its real life counterpart more than I usually do, as the interior that they have set up for that house was just so fun and unique feeling. The exterior is inspired by it, but sim lot constraints required more creative license. I highly recommend you look at some photos, it really is such an interesting place.

Sod houses, which were constructed by cutting hunks of the top layer of the grasslands (which were held together by the strong roots of the native grasses) were common throughout the latter part of the nineteenth century and began to peter out in the early part of the twentieth century. They weren't the most luxurious accommodations, but did have the virtue of being warm in the winter and cool in the summer.

Unfortunately as the walls were made from the earth, bugs could be an issue and I've given this lot the creepy crawlies bug challenge for ~realism~. It's also off-the-grid, and has a functional root cellar (meaning I put the fridge down there, have fun in thunderstorms).

This lot is fully playtested (might have been the most I've played in a while actually, I wanted to make sure the crib worked). Please please enjoy this build. I know I always say it but this one is actually my favorite, and making this work with the constraints of Sims 4 terrain tools was quite the undertaking and I'm so pleased with it.

If you use it please tag me in any photos, I love seeing what y'all get up to with my builds!!

Gallery ID: antiqueplumbobs

SFS | Google Drive

@publicvanillabuilds @twentiethcenturysims @maxismatchccworld @mmoutfitters

#ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 build #sims 4 build #ts4 vanilla #sims 4 vanilla #sims 4 cc free #ts4 cc free #cc free build #vanilla builds #ts4 historical #sims 4 decades challenge #decades challenge #ts4 decades challenge #antiquatedresidential

[saradika]

—HOW TO USE CANVA TO MAKE MOODBOARDS

I got a kind message asking how I make moodboards in Canva, so I wanted to do a little tutorial! Canva is a free graphic design app/website, and I use it for everything.

To start - open the app/page and use the search bar at the top to search for a template. I usually use: photo collage, scrapbook, aesthetic moodboard - all of these will pull up pre-made templates for you to use.

[I have a couple linked below that I’ve used and liked, or have bookmarked to try:]

one | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight

Anything with a crown is for Canva Pro members - you used to be able to use the templates as a free member (just not the paid assets) but that changed recently. The linked templates above are all free ones that you can use right away.

PHOTOS:

Once you’re in the template, you can press the + in the bottom corner to bring up the menus. The Elements tab have items you can add in (more on that later) - for now you want to go to Uploads, and add the photos you want to use. I mostly get mine from Pinterest and Google Images.

[If you are writing an x reader fic and are looking for tips for creating an inclusive moodboard, there are some awesome resources here: one | two !]

After that, go back to your template and click on the different photo frames, and use the Replace button in the toolbar - it will let you replace the template photos with your own. Double tap to move and resize your image within the frame, (and there are also filters you can use if you want!)

When working on moodboards, I like to move things around. You can replace the frames they use by clicking on the item and then clicking the Trashcan. Then go back to the + menu, and then Elements, and scroll down to Frames. You can scroll through them all, but my fave keywords to use in the search bar is: polaroid, torn, and ripped.

Once they’re added, you can move them wherever you want. There’s a button on the toolbar that says Position, and you can shift the object forward/back between the items around it.

DETAILS:

Once you add your photos, then comes the details! You can change the background color and add/change the fonts (or upload your fave font to use!) Try out all the tools on the toolbar to see what you can do, there’s a lot of options.

I love love layering with my moodboard, so I will go back to the + / Elements tab, and then search for things to layer in. My fave searches for Graphics recently are: ripped paper, grunge patterns (to use in the background), star patterns, dried flowers, and dried leaves.

You can use the Position tool on them to fit them in-between or in front of your photos. I usually use them to hide harsh edges or in places that look a little empty.

I also like adding fabric texture to the backgrounds, to fill the space between the photo frames. There isn’t an easy way to do this - the best way I figured out is to find an image of the texture you want, and then to add a photo frame with a torn or jagged edge in the very back (and then use your new texture there). You can duplicate and move it, to cover the space (you can see some examples below - the beige flower pattern in the Din one, the black velvet for Alfred).

Here are some examples of the original templates, and then what my finished ones look like. You can see what I swapped out, moved, and added:

original image | my moodboard

EDITING:

Once I am happy with the design I download it, and then edit. I love this part - pop it into your fave editing app, and play around with the exposure/contrast/hues/sharpness. I will mess with the color balance & vibrancy as well - this can really take a moodboard I like, to one I love.

Here’s some gifs I made showing before /after editing - both are pretty before but I think the after has an oomph that I really appreciate.

[When you finish with one and want to use the same template, you can click Make a Copy, and it will duplicate it. I began with templates but everything I do now are copies of heavily/edited templates or ones I’ve made from scratch. But for starting off, I think a template is the way to go!]

And that’s it!! I would really suggest just opening it up and seeing what you can do. Not all of mine turn out great, but each time I think I get a better handle on all the different options and what my moodboard style is.

I really hope this helps! And feel free to tag me if you post any you make, I’d love to see them (or drop me an ask if you have any questions!) 💖💕

#please give this a reblog if it was helpful! 💖 #and just a note the 4th example is an OC x Character fic moodboard #moodboards #graphics #tutorials #aesthetic moodboard #resources #fic moodboard #fan fic meta #fic writing #writing resources

[oizysian]

Part III. Irreplaceable

I Set the World on Fire masterlist

Word count: 1.6k

“Why haven’t you sent Maximoff your demands yet, Natasha?”

“I know that Wanda is suffering. Right now, that’s enough.”

“How is that enough?” Yelena snapped. “You could have all of her assets, her businesses - all of her power.”

“I have what matters most.”

“To her! Not to you!”

Natasha finally raised her head to acknowledge her sister, her expression unchanging.

“Y/N matters more to me than owning everything Wanda has.”

“And what about owning Wanda? That was your goal. That was the whole point of this!”

“Owning Wanda would be a bonus.” Natasha admitted. “But having Y/N and knowing Wanda is suffering, unable to do anything for her, is enough for now.”

Natasha walked over to her sister and placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing slightly in assurance.

“We will have her in time. We’ll have it all. Then the Romanoff’s will be the most powerful family in New York.”

Natasha began to walk off, but Yelena’s words stopped her in her tracks.

“I can’t wait to get my hands on her for what she did to us.” She growled.

“And for what she did to Clint. I haven’t forgotten.” Natasha said softly.

“It seems that with Y/N you’ve disregarded everything else.”

“Not everything, sestra. Wanda and the empire she’s built will be mine.”

•

Wanda couldn’t control it for another minute longer.

She threw her glass against the wall, watching as it smashed into tiny bits and the contents spilled all along the now damaged surface.

In a rage, she grabbed armfuls of paperwork scattered among her desk and tossed it all on the ground.

She kicked and punched and scratched at everything she could get her hands on, not only destroying everything around her, but slowly destroying herself.

“If I hadn’t been such a bitch …” she grumbled to herself, her fingers trailing along the bloodstain on the wall from her self-inflicted injuries. “Now I lost her. Just like …” she let out a sob. “Just like Pietro.”

She slid down the wall, sitting amongst her scattered papers and broken furniture. What had she done? What would become of Y/N now?

Tears stained her cheeks, the bags under her eyes evidence that she hadn’t been sleeping or taking care of herself in the slightest. She searched day and night for Y/N, never having any luck, always a step behind Natasha.

She brought her hands up to her face, blood mixing with her tears as she rubbed her eyes.

Her men had done what they thought they should’ve; they destroyed, robbed, and even burned down numerous of Natasha’s well known owned establishments. Wanda hadn’t ordered it, but she certainly didn’t tell them to stop. So it had been weeks, months even that they were out destroying things and she was searching fruitlessly for Y/N.

“I need to pull myself together.” She said softly, looking down at her wounded hands. “I have to - for Y/N.”

Her knuckles were scraped and bruised, her nails left half moon cuts on her palms, and she suspected she might’ve even broken one of her fingers while she went around destroying the room.

“Y/N needs me … she needs me to be strong.”

With a groan, she lifted herself up, bracing her weight on whatever was left of her desk. She panted softly, her tears still staining her pink cheeks as she calmed herself down. She would find Y/N and she would get her back.

A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts.

“Wanda?” Dimitri opened the door slightly, peeking in before stepping fully inside.

“What is it, Dimi?” Her voice was low and her accent was thick. She was tired.

“Your proof.” He said, holding up his phone. “I got it.”

She looked up at him, her eyes glistening with hope.

“Get him.”

•

“Why won’t you eat, detka? Are you sick?”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You have to eat.”

I looked away from her. I didn’t want to eat. I didn’t want to live. I had given myself to a monster to save the woman I loved and I was in hell. Natasha wasn’t cruel to me, not really. As a matter of fact, sometimes she was rather … loving. She seemed to care about me but I couldn’t trust her. She was only keeping me here to hurt Wanda.

She reached over to me and grabbed my chin gently, turning my face to look at her.

“When will you stop thinking about her? Haven’t I treated you right? Taken care of you?”

“Yes,” my voice was small. “But …”

She moved herself closer to me, mere inches of space between our faces as she looked into my eyes.

“Wanda didn’t treat you right. I do. All you did was fight and say hateful things towards each other. Why do you yearn for that?”

How could she know that? Her words swam around in my head, the reality of the situation hitting me like a ton of bricks. How did she know so much about our relationship?

The door burst open and I turned my attention to whoever just entered the room like a bat out of hell. She continued to stare at me, uncaring about the intrusion.

“They know.”

When I realized who had entered the room, I went pale, my body stiffening with realization.

“That sounds like a personal problem, doesn’t it, Leo?”

He looked panicked, and I had never seen such a look on his face in my life. But what was he doing here? What was going on?

“They know everything. She’ll kill me -”

“Maybe you should’ve thought about that,” she turned her head to face him. “Before you helped me kidnap her girlfriend, hm?”

“Leo…” I whispered, unable to accept what I was hearing.

He looked at me, flinching slightly at the look of betrayal on my face, and turned his attention back to Natasha.

“You have to protect me!”

“I don’t have to do anything.” She said with a smile.

I pulled my knees up to my chest, resting my head on them as I tried to accept what I had just been thrust into. Leo had betrayed me, betrayed Wanda. No, she wouldn’t hesitate to kill him.

Natasha ran her hand up and down my back, the sound of the fabric of my shirt ruffling the only sound in the silent room.

“Why don’t we let Y/N decide what happens to you?”

I could almost hear the grin that was plastered on her face at the situation. I didn’t even bother to look up at them. I shook my head.

“What was that?” She asked tauntingly, stroking my hair.

“Send him to Wanda.” I whispered softly and she returned her attention to Leo.

“Looks like your time is up, buddy. You were a great help.”

“You-you can’t do this to me! Not after what I’ve done!”

“Your usefulness has come and gone. Maybe you should’ve thought this through.”

I finally looked up at him, his face completely white and his body shaking. He feared Wanda - as he should. He had been one of her most trusted men, one of her oldest friends, and he betrayed her. Wanda had killed people for less.

Without another word, he turned and ran out, probably planning his escape from both women if he was smart. I stared at the opened door as Natasha continued to touch me mindlessly, stroking my hair, caressing my back. She always had to be touching me in some way.

“I’ll let Wanda take care of him. He’s nothing to me.”

“Why did you let him believe differently?”

I shifted my eyes towards her and she was still smiling.

“My offer to him was money, a position of power … respect. If he believed that he was irreplaceable, that was his own mistake.” I finally turned to face her. “Nobody is safe in this business.”

“You used him. Just like you’re using me.”

“I’m not using you, printsessa. If I was, would I have kept you alive this long?”

Fear struck me harder than any blow ever could. She was right. If she was just using me as bait or as a tool of revenge, this would’ve been over long ago. This was something else, and that scared me more than anything.

“I take care of what’s mine.” She took one of my hands in hers and brought it up to her lips, kissing my knuckles. “He was never part of my family. Never would be.”

“What am I to you?” I asked shakily, watching her with wide eyes.

“You … are what’s left of my humanity.”

The questions burned my throat but before I could ask she continued to speak.

“Do you know how many there were before you?” I shook my head. “Four. None of them lasted more than a month. But you …” she spoke as she pressed my hand against her cheek. “You’re different. I know now why Wanda kept you so secret.”

“She was ashamed of me. Ashamed to love me.” I said sadly.

“She knew you were special and wanted to keep you all for herself.”

I looked her up and down for a moment before blinking wordlessly. She was being raw and honest with me. Why?

“What do you want from Wanda?”

She licked her lips, her eyes searching mine.

“I want everything. I want everything that she is. I want her.”

I flinched at her words and pulled away from her. Me giving into her meant nothing. It was just another victory for her. She was still going to go after Wanda for whatever reason and my choice to give in or not meant nothing to her.

“You were her everything and now you’re mine. If you had resisted me, this may have been a more painful experience for you.” She laughed. “But definitely not for me.”

She picked up the plate of food that had been completely ignored and stood from the bed.

“I wouldn’t want to hurt you, but I will if I have to. Remember that, printsessa.”

•

@marvelogic @casquinhaa @mathxa @oh-thats-cute @ornorr @milkeeteaa @souanick @nothanksbye07 @romanoff101 @dracarys8287 @marvelwomen-simp @tigerlillyruiz @lzzysfreak @whatdoyoudo12 @mrsrushman

#oizysian writes #wanda maximoff x female reader #natasha romanoff x female reader #mafia!au #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda maximoff #natasha romanoff x you #wanda maximoff x y/n #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #Natasha Romanoff x y/n

[faerievampling]

An Unexpected Visitor

Summary: Ascended!Astarion and Tav have been together for thousands of years. One day, an unexpected visitor shows up, reminding them of their past and offering them a new adventure.

Word Count: 4k

Here's the link to AO3!

Pairing: (soft) Ascended!Astarion x Female Tav

Warning: 18+, Explicit. PiV. Oral Sex. Light bondage. Light dom/sub.

A/N: This is going to be a multi-chapter story I will be posting here and on AO3. Largely but not entirely based on my headcanons for Ascended!Astarion that you can read here: Part 1. Part 2. (Not necessary to read first!!)

I hope you enjoy!

You wake up with a strong sense of unease. Astarion, your creator and husband, picks up on it immediately, of course. The two of you are so profoundly connected, your minds nestled together; he knows that you do not know the ‘why’ for these feelings.

Astarion kisses and cuddles you good morning, as he always does, but he holds you a bit longer this time, not wanting to get out of bed with his consort feeling this way. His hold on you is tight as he buries his nose in your hair.

Alas, Astarion has work to do, including ensuring the protection of his territories and assets, especially at a time like this.

The war, my darling. The war. Astarion reminds you again. You hadn’t been affected by it at all, and didn't really care. And Astarion really didn’t care that you didn’t care. He only wanted your happiness and wellbeing, and had worked hard to keep you away from it all.

But he feared that maybe you could sense it, or were beginning to. His weariness, his stress; those feelings he did his best to guard you from. 

Astarion cradled you to his chest, one arm on your naked back and the other nestled in the root of your hair, giving you gentle massages as you listen to the thump of his ever-beating heart. After a while, Astarion repositions the two of you so that he may offer his neck to you. He knows this is your (second) favorite place to feed, because you can feel the beat of his heart and drink in his scent.

He also knows you’d rather like to feed from the inside of his thigh, but now was not the time for that. Well, maybe it was, but the two of you were already late for court.

As you sup of his blood, you moan with pleasure - there is nothing better to a bride than the blood of her creator, and Astarion was a very generous master. 

“Your master adores you, my little darling,” Astarion whispers in your ear as you feed, his hand moving to caress the back of your head. His teasing words cause you to grind into his hips, and you can feel him beginning to get hard. 

“Enough, my pet,” Astarion says as he pulls you away, detaching your fangs from his ivory skin. As he meets your gaze, the memories of your days of madness wash over him like the shock of ice cold water. 

Long ago, Astarion insisted you feed on him and only him. There was danger in this, a bride feeding too much from her Master. This, Astarion knew, but his mind was shrouded with paranoia. 

In another land, one of the brides of vampire master Geldon Moth was poisoned and killed. Once Astarion heard the news, he came to a quick decision. 

Believing his blood to be the safest for you, you were to feed on him and only on him. After months of letting you gorge, Astarion saw the bridal madness for the first time. 

Astarion is quick to push the memory away. Before he does, you catch a glimpse of the scene: you’re inconsolable, starving, horny as a bitch in heat, and as violent as ever. Astarion is crying, begging you to come back to yourself. 

Astarion no longer remains your only food source. He is your primary one, indeed, but the essence of others is to be drunk from a goblet, not from lips to skin. That is reserved for you and your creator. 

Thou art mine. A thought rings in your head.

You help Astarion dress, as you have for the past…so many years. Astarion dismissed his footman so long ago, preferring to do the work himself with the help of his consort. His aversion to touch, anyone’s but your own, was an ever-growing symptom of the choices the both of you made so long ago.

Astarion plants a tender kiss on your lips before he goes, and your own maid comes in to help you dress and take care of your hair. She wants to put it in an updo of some kind, so that you match with the other ladies of the court. 

But you’ve been feeling rather rebellious, and Astarion sat on the throne, so you could do whatever you wanted. And so you did.

You keep it long, like a curtain, and now that Astarion had finally moved on from his insistence that you wear something low cut, you choose a dress that is modest, comfortable, but regal enough. You ditch the shoes. You’ve been alive for nearly two millenniums. You know your beauty is already unmatched, and you needn’t worry yourself with discomfort. Your feet rarely touch the floor, anyways. 

But your current maid doesn’t seem to agree, and always argues with you about the fucking shoes. Before she even begins, you hiss at her.

This maid, Bethild, is one you’ve had for a while now. First joining your service as a young woman, Bethild was now rather old and round, you think. She tuts at you for hissing before crossing her arms, ready to give you a lecture. 

“It’s not befitting of a Lady in your position to be hissing,” Bethild addressed you in ways others would die for, but you rather liked her, and Astarion did too.

But before she could continue, you use your vampiric telepathy to force your way in. THE DRESS IS LONG ENOUGH. NOBODY WILL SEE. You scream this into her mind, trying to cause her a bit of pain, maybe some nausea.

Bethild knows when she’s lost a battle, and she murmurs something about your Master hearing about this as she bumbles her way out of your room.

You roll your eyes at her as she leaves. Why must we do this everyday? You reach out to your husband. But he doesn’t immediately respond, because he already knows your grief: it is simply becoming increasingly difficult for you to tolerate mortals.

We can get you a new maid, my consort. Or we can get rid of them all together. Whatever it is you want, it will be yours. Astarion reaching into your mind is always comfortable, and the contact sends a shiver to your core.

You didn’t understand how Astarion could handle it so well. So much better than you. You were thankful that he could, of course, but you just didn’t understand. 

You’re perfect the way you are, my consort. You don’t need to be like me. You are mine, and I will always take care of you.

Once you’re ready, you float to your throne, making a bit of a scene because of your tardiness. Astarion doesn’t care; the subjects can wait, especially for you.

As you take your seat, Astarion holds your hand, idly (and a bit anxiously) playing with your fingers as he handles business. He likes to look at them as he mulls over the proceedings in his mind; he plays with your rings, twisting them around your fingers and sometimes switching them between digits. Every day, he looks forward to seeing what choice of jewelry you will make. It makes him feel tremendous pride to see the beauty of your soft and smooth hands, and to see the decadent jewels on your pretty fingers.

Whatever business Astarion is handling today is, frankly, totally lost on you. If something important happens, something you need to know, Astarion will tell you. 

So, you lose yourself in the folds of you and your eternal lover’s mind. You always enter this vampiric trance during court. You needn’t speak, because you trust your beloved creator to speak for you. 

After a few hours and a few dealings later, something briskly breaks you out of this trance. That unease. 

Astarion squeezes your hand to draw your attention to him. You meet his gaze, and you see a lot there: love, need, possession, inquiry, frustration. You’re having a hard time parsing through it, but what you gather is you are making Astarion extremely uncomfortable. 

We’re almost done here. After court, you will be sequestered away until I know you are safe. Is all he communicates with you.

It’s just a sense of unease, my love. Please just stay with me, you are all the protection I need. Don’t lock me away. You are practically begging at this point, but your face gives nothing away. You are dampened by your curse. Rather it be the vampiric curse or the curse of time, you aren’t sure. You are still you, but your light shines dimmer.

Astarion narrows his eyes at you. Your foresight has been right before. 

You shake your head at him. Now, you’re both starting to lose your poker faces. The mortals murmur around you, but the two of you exist only with each other at this moment, and the rest of the world is diminished. 

This is different. It’s just a feeling, nothing more. I’ve had no visions, Master. You call him this to soften him up; it makes Astarion’s cock twitch just to hear you say the word. 

As Astarion’s thoughts turn lewd, a servant approaches him, informing him of the next visitor to be heard. You feel Astarion’s mind slip away from yours as he focuses on the world around him. 

But the words of the servant are tumbling around in his head. Scary, strange looking elf. 

What? You ask, probing into Astarion’s mind.

He looks over to you, his handsome features and lustful eyes (he’s still having some lewd thoughts) causes your breath to catch and sends your second heartbeat to race. He said the visitor knew us, and was a terrifying, strange looking elf.

A picture has already formed in Astarion’s mind of a strange green egg that was briefly in your possession during your adventuring days. Still holding each other’s gaze, you both silently acknowledge that the ‘strange elf’ is in fact, not an elf. 

The two of you further slip into each other's minds, a feeling so familiar by now yet no less pleasurable. The folds of your waking mind are fondled by his, and as he is weaving through you, he finds a memory he cannot ignore: that pretty clearing. His own version of the memory rises within him, meeting yours halfway. He is focused on that first kiss, that first taste of you, your folds, the taste of your sweat…

You can’t help but smile as you hear Astarion’s heart racing. The passage of time is cruel and has taken many things from you and Astarion both. But neither of you could ever forget that first night.

Focus, my lover. You poke at him. 

Astarion smirks. It must be a githyanki. We fought many of them, remember, little love?

You remember, only vaguely. Astarion’s memory was much sharper than yours, due to his ascended state. 

Deciding to give it no more thought, you drift off into your trance again, and Astarion lets you. You needn’t care about this mysterious visitor; you had other things to worry about, like drinking blood, striking fear into the hearts of mortals, and how you were going to convince your darling husband to get on his knees and put his pretty lips on your glistening, swollen sex later tonight.

You glance at Astarion as he’s listening to one of the servants. You focus on his pretty lips, and how perfect they look around your nipple, or your clit.

You think you’ll start by wearing a low cut dress to dinner - yes, that would be the right move. He wouldn’t be able to keep his eyes off the plush curve of your breasts, especially if you could manage to wear a corset. You’re also thinking you’ll skip the panties, because surely you can goad him into putting a hand up your skirts. Maybe you’ll invite him to feed on your inner thigh; he loves that tender spot so much, he likely wouldn't be able to help himself to having a taste of you —

“I see your union has stood the test of time,” The sound of the woman’s voice snaps you back into the present with a whirl. You know her voice. You know her face, even: pretty, green skin, orange hair, she even looks rather young, still. 

“It is good to see you both. You look….well.” The githyanki says. She is wearing armor, and has a long sword sheathed on her back. She looks at you uneasily, but you see a fondness in her eyes and a comfortable sense of familiarity.

Lae’zel. Astarion tells you. She was once your lover. You can feel Astarion seething at the reminder that once, you were not his. You don’t really know how to respond to him, because you do remember your time with Lae’zel, but it was so long ago it is literally ancient history.

You knit your brows together as you take her in. Her coming must be that feeling of unease. And Astarion tells you as much as he converses with Lae’zel. She wants something, he tells you. Despite his broiling jealousy, Astarion keeps a cordial, straight face as he converses with Lae’zel. 

She has been in the Astral Plane, a place outside of time and space, fighting a seemingly never ending war with Vlaakith. And she has come to her only living allies on the mortal plane, the Ancunins, for help.

Lae’zel and Astarion come to an agreement for a private meeting on the morrow. Astarion’s emotions are all over the place; he ends court early, deciding to sequester you to the bedchamber early.

As he marches you to the boudoir, hand on your wrist as you’re barely keeping up with him, Astarion is stopped by a servant. Whatever message Astarion receives leaves him feeling desperate - his mind was disarranged, his face twisted in grief.

Parsing through his mind, you can’t even manage to make out a few words - whatever has happened, Astarion is either hiding it from you or still trying to process it himself. Likely a bit of both, you decide.

But once the two of you reach your bed chambers, he becomes a single minded man.

Astarion grabs both of your wrists with one hand and has you bent over the bed before you can even register your own movement. With his other hand, he is pushing up your skirts, finding his way to your naked sex. 

“How ignorant of me to believe all of your past lovers were dead,” His voice escapes through gritted teeth, low and raspy. Astarion maneuvers you on the bed so that you are now on your knees with your ass in the air, hands still being held behind your back. With no way to support yourself, your head rests on the bed. 

So much for your plan of getting Astarion on his knees for you.

Astarion’s grip on your wrists tighten as his other hand grazes your exposed labia, caressing the lips of your cunt with his dexterous fingers before sliding a finger inside of you until he is knuckle deep.

“Do you remember your time with her, my consort?” The sensation of his finger being dragged against your slick, spongy walls send you rolling your hips into his hand, desperate for more.

Yes, you think desperately, even though he already knows the answer. He’s surely searched your mind already, probably long ago. 

“Say it. Use your words,” His tone is harsh, but his fingers gentle as he slides another into you with little resistance. 

“Yes, I remember,” You say, the words feeling odd in your mouth. You realized you hadn’t spoken aloud in quite a while.

Astarion lets go of your hands and brings his arm around your front, a hand gripping your neck and bringing you upright, so that your back is to his chest. His two fingers are still buried inside you. 

“I am forever yours, Astarion,” His grip on your neck is gentle, and you’re able to turn your head to look at him. His ruby eyes bore into you, such a perfect reflection of your own. 

His own eyes are pleading. Tell me. Please.

You brace yourself. Not because you don’t mean it, but because you know you will never hear the reciprocation spoken aloud.

“I love you, Astarion,” You supplicate.

His eyes are wet, just for a moment, and then his lips crash into yours, his hand trailing up to grab your jaw, to guide you to him. He relinquishes you from his fingers and quickly removes his clothing, not wasting any time to put himself between your legs. 

Your dress is long gone by the time Astarion lines his cock up with your entrance, eyes locked with yours in an intense gaze. 

“Say it again. For your Master, spawn,” He growls. You knew this was merely just a part he wanted you to play sometimes, but it hurt all the same. He knew this. But he needed this from you.

“I love you eternally, Master,” You speak with a soft voice barely above a whisper as Astarion rubs his swollen tip against your puffy folds.

His ruby eyes bore into you as he pushes into you slowly; a moan escaping his pretty lips once he’s bottomed out, balls deep inside of you. He leans over and plants a kiss on your forehead before meeting your gaze again.

“You are my everything, Tav.” His voice is raw, and this is all he can manage before his lips meet yours again. You clench around his cock as he begins to set a slow, steady pace. 

That tiny longing inside of you vanishes, and you know that you are his everything. You tangle your hand in his hair and deepen your kisses; Astarion whimpers at this, and when he quickened his pace, your cunt is making lewd, squelching noises at the power of his thrusts.

“Gods above,“ Astarion breathes against your lips. He begins to play with you, adjusting his pace until he finds the perfect rhythm to exuberate the lewd sounds of your desperation.

Bringing himself upright, Astarion watches you; your lips are parted, showing off your beautiful fangs, which he loves so much. He admires your smooth, unmarred skin, as he was careful not to leave any scars on your body. Sure, he had wanted to permanently mark you, but he thought it cruel and pointless: you are his, and nothing will ever change that.

As Astarion slides his cock along your walls, you can’t help but clench around him as you eye your gorgeous husband.

Astarion’s beauty was that of literal legends; as you eye his disheveled curls, the cut of his muscles and jaw, and you know that every ballad, every poem, every story of the beauty of Astarion the Decadent, Hero of Baldur’s Gate, is true. 

Astarion needs to taste you now, and he slowly pulls his cock out from your desperate cunt, causing you to whimper from the loss. Astarion lowers himself between your legs before examining your sex.

“I’ve made a sloppy little mess of you, haven’t I?” Astarion smirks at you, his pupils blown with lust. With his fingers, he spreads your folds, eyeing you as your anticipation grows. He swipes his tongue from your entrance to your clit before he wraps his lips around your swollen, glistening clit and begins to suck; his tongue is so soft, so gentle, and the steady circles he is making with his tongue have you trembling beneath him.

“Perfect…” He murmurs against your sex, the vibration of his silky voice causing you to whimper. “You’re so…” He can’t even finish his sentence as he begins to devour you, and he is desperate to taste you as you come. He has you screaming his name in mere seconds, and you are putty in his hands as he brings himself back up to his knees and rams his cock in you.

You’re so wet, and to your surprise, Astarion inserts two fingers inside you along with his cock; the stretch makes you groan, and he smiles wildly as his other hand grasps your jaw, pulling your head aside to expose your neck to him.

Mine. Mine. Mine. To do with as I please. Body, blood, and soul. You’re mine to fuck, to stretch out, to eat, to use, and you can never leave me. This scares you, but you can’t deny your increasing wetness for him. And you can’t deny the truth of his words.

Astarion slides his fangs into you, making you shudder as he moans loudly; he is so deep inside you, you can feel his swollen tip hitting your cervix, and you claw at his scalp and his back as he drinks you in.

After just a few sips, Astarion is coming undone, and his arms are around you now, holding you so tightly to him that you can’t breathe. You can feel his balls contracting against the curve of your ass as he spills his seed inside you. He trails mindless kisses on your skin as he comes down from the high of his orgasm.

He holds you to him for a while, cock still inside of you, and you can feel the decreasing thump of his heart against your chest. Eventually, he rolls over, and when you’re released from his cock, you feel his seed spilling out of you, dripping down your slick folds and pooling at your pert asshole. 

“I’m going to commission a painting of you, just like this.” He says as he examines the damage. “I’d have to gouge their eyes out after, of course.”

Of course. You reach out in agreement with a smile on your face.

“Speak, my darling. I want to hear your pretty voice.” Astarion gathers you between his legs, your back to his chest as he wraps his arms around you and cradles you to him. He’s still trailing kisses wherever he can: your neck, your shoulder, your cheek, your ear.

“Sorry. Habit.” It was a habit, but nowadays, it was more of a preference.

“You needn’t apologize, lover,” Astarion rests his head on your shoulder, breathing in the scent of your skin. “I’d like you to attend the meeting with Lae’zel with me.”

You needn’t be anywhere but right by my side. Lord Moth’s estate was attacked again. A few of his spawn were killed.

Well, that is far better than being locked in the boudoir, you think. “Of course I’ll come with you.” 

After a moment, you speak again. “I can’t believe she’s still alive. I thought all our past friends were dead.”

“Me too. From what I can recall about Lae’zel, it was ignorant of us to think that woman could ever die.” The two of you giggle as you reminisce on old adventures, the ones Astarion is willing to dwell on, to enjoy. 

Astarion doesn’t mention his jealous feelings about Lae’zel’s sudden reappearance, but you feel it in his actions as the two of you spend the rest of the day in bed; he takes you again, biting you in places he had never before, coming in every hole of yours that he could, until you were well and truly taken and used.

Eventually, the two of you drift off in each other's arms, as you always did. But your lasting thoughts are not on blood, fear, or Astarion’s cock (well maybe a little bit), but on the ‘why’ of Lae’zel’s return. Astarion shares in your anxiety, but assures you to be patient, as all will be revealed on the morrow. 

Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5. Chapter 6.

Masterlist

#ascended!astarion #astarion smut #astarion bg3 #Ascended Astarion x reader #Ascended Astarion x tav #Ascended Astarion x you #astarion x female tav #lae'zel is also here lol #soft ascended astarion #lord astarion #spawn tav #astarion #vampire tav #ascended!astarion x tav #astarion x female reader #astarion x tav #astarion x you #astarion x reader #Killing Time

[blighted-elf]

Baldur’s Gate 3 Modding Tutorial - How to Swap Your Character’s Head Preset Mid-game

Got a bunch of messages asking how I did this without restarting, so I thought I’d write out a quick tutorial.

1 - Extract the Models.pak file from your game directory's Data folder somewhere using the lslib tool. I don't recommend extracting it to your game directory because you won't need all the files, it can get kinda messy, and it might cause issues in future updates. Just put them in a random folder on your desktop for now or something. I'll refer to this folder as the extracted folder for now.

2 - Figure out which preset your character is currently using (mine was the Elf Female A), and which one you'd like to swap it out for. Keep in mind, you can’t use one from a different gender/race without issues.

*I used one from the “New Character Creation Presets WIP” mod. If also using this mod, you need to install it as normal, then extract the mod's own .pak file before continuing.

3 - Find the .gr2 file of the new preset you want, and copy it into your game's directory. For me, it goes to C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Baldurs Gate 3\Data\Generated\Public\Shared\Assets\Characters\_Anims\Elves\_Female\Resources The exact directory will vary depending on your race/gender (refer to the extracted folders for help). If you don’t have the folders needed inside your game directory, then create them.

4 - Rename the .gr2 file you just moved to be what the old preset was named. For me, Kaari.gr2 became ELF_F_NKD_Head_A.gr2

Optional:

5 - If you want to also use the new head’s skin texture (and/or edit the skin yourself), just copy the three .dds files from your extracted Data\Generated\Public\Shared\Assets\Characters\_Models etc folder, then place them in your game directory. For me, I put them in Data\Generated\Public\Shared\Assets\Characters\_Models\Elves\ELF_F_NKD\ELF_F_Head_A\Resources

6 - Rename accordingly, just like with the .gr2 files. For me, Kaari_CLEA.dds became ELF_F_NKD_Head_A_CLEA.dds and so on. Do this for the other two .dds files as well.

Load your game and that's it! It should now replace the previous head with the new one. Your character's icon will still look like the old one unfortunately. I'll try to find out how to fix it.

#Baldur's Gate #Baldur's Gate 3 #Baldur's Gate 3 Modding #BG3 #BG3 modding #Blighted mods #Blighted modding #Hope this makes sense!

[sinnerdolly]

Good loser—Nagi Seishiro

Minors do not interact. Nsfw/Smut.

word counter—1160.

Plot—Nagi's just lost a game, so now he wants to claim his consolation prize... you.

warning— stable relationship, soft!dom Nagi, kinda public sex. Y/n has a bit of a pedantic personality with everybody except Nagi.

English isn't my mother language, if you see any error you're welcome to correct me.

People are complex, attraction even more so, added to attraction we have monogamy, which we want to make independent as well. Because holding someone else is a symbol of little commitment, but the separation of assets is logical.

Toxicity is quite abundant these days, or so I see walking the university hallways. Fights between boys over some bimbo with a nice ass, a primate situation; hippie allies philosophizing to fuck her "friend", plot twist she's going to fuck the biggest idiot of all. Because, I repeat, instinct chooses.

And, unfortunately, I found myself in the same situation. My eyes went to one boy in particular, Nagi Seishiro, my recent boyfriend. Five months of relationship, thanks to my desire to sleep at a party and him playing video games in the same room when I woke up.

For a prejudiced critic like me, not deciphering him made me interested in knowing him. Nagi was such an odd chap. At first glance he was lazy and listless, but losing somehow highlighted a passionate fire in his eyes that made me wet.

Like this moment, he had just lost to Ryusei Shidou on penalties, and he was heading towards my place in the stands, his gray eyes focused on me, sweaty and frustrated, desperate to claim me as a consolation prize, knowing how much I love to be it.

He stood out in the crowd, the imposing manner of his walking causing people to step out of the way. Pretty funny since he's the gentlest person I know.

“I want you right now”

I nodded like a fool, hypnotized by that aura of a caged beast that his pores gave off. The heat in my belly spread to the inside of my legs, the desire awakening in anticipation. The words he had just said meant one thing... he was going to fuck me in the first lonely corner he saw. So I went down the steps, taking him by his narrow wrist and we disappeared through the doors of the main bedrooms.

When the door closed, I couldn't continue on my way, Nagi grabbed me by the left thigh, and carried me only with the strength of one hand. Our noses touched, and his eyelids were no longer half-closed from laziness, but from desire. My mouth was watering from kissing him.

With each step the kisses became more intense, the touch had a purely carnal objective. My hand went under his shirt, feeling the smooth sculpted skin on his abs, while he dryly rubbed his erection against me. Sighs and ragged breaths, interspersed between lips and tongues.

The laundry room didn't have a key, so Nagi soon slammed the door to lock us inside. My feet met the ground again, while his hands caressed my buttocks in search of the condom that I always bring to his games.

I threw my blouse somewhere in the room, unbuttoning the fly of my pants afterwards. With impatience consuming him, Seishiro lifted me by the waist and sat me on one of the washing machines, finishing the job on my jeans.

Now with complete freedom of my joints, he placed me like a rag doll around his hips, pressing me against his chest. The warmth that his skin gave off took away the cold of that humid room.

He opened the condom with a slight tug between his teeth. And he scattered desperate kisses along my neck and collarbones, while he spread the latex along his cock. My fingers tugged at his white hair a little, drawing a few gasps from him.

It was enough to move my panties aside a little for him to slide between my rubbery walls, so lubricated that they didn't even need prior stretching. Of course, with or without games, it's always hard to take Nagi, if it weren't for his softdom nature, I probably wouldn't be able to handle him.

His thrusts were deep, as were his lips devouring mine. My body was pressed against his immense figure, while my legs were held in place by those large hands.

It didn't take long for the moans to spill out into the darkness, our gazes connected, expressing the sated lust for the other. I could feel his racing heart pounding against my chest.

The moment was so intimate that it was difficult not to come from the pleasure, Nagi blinded my senses, the chemistry between us makes the most ridiculous situations passionate, like now, fucking on a washing machine; but at this moment, with his member stimulating every erogenous zone inside me, it seemed like a scene worthy of a Shakespearean novel.

Nagi twitched between my walls, signaling that he was close. I let out a little cry of surprise when I was in the air again, holding on tightly to Sei's shoulders, who, with just the strength of his arms, began to fuck me with fervor again.

My moans turned into a kind of hiccup between jumps that made him put his hands on my butt. Stunned by my boyfriend's actions, I looked into his eyes, to find that obsessed look that only appears on the court focused on me... tss and I thought I couldn't get any hornier.

My lungs were suffocating, and my eyes were watering from the pleasure. I think my lower lip was bleeding from how hard I bit it, trying to reduce the screams. Almost impossible when his sturdy tip hit so deep, and his thickness stretched me so well.

"Sei..." I gasped desperately, tightly wrinkling the collar of his t-shirt. “I'm going... I'm coming”

He kissed my lips one last time, before convulsions shattered my stability and pleasure exploded throughout my body. My eyelids closed, and the waves of heat seemed eternal along with his attacks against my center.

I was so sensitive that I could feel the condom being filled inside me. Now still, Nagi held me while we caught our breath, still hit by the intensity of the orgasm. A minute or two later, he placed me on the washing machine again.

And, with a somewhat cooler head, we managed to talk.

“I'm sorry you lost, are you okay?”

I caressed his cheeks gently, while he replicated the action on my thighs. He gave me one of his taciturn smiles, Nagi is one of those people who smiles with his eyes and barely moves the corner of his mouth, an adorable detail from my perspective.

“Good? I couldn’t be better”

Sei pushed his weight forward, ready to kiss me. Apparently during our intimate time we pressed several buttons by accident, because the machine below me started to move, scaring the shit out of me.

Nagi laughed when he saw me clinging to his chest like a terrified kitten. I hit his shoulder, feigning offense, but he continued laughing... so I had no choice but to kiss him while laughing.

What can I tell? The other couples are shit next to us.

#blue lock #nagi seishiro smut #nagi seishiro #reo mikage #reo smut #blue lock smut #bachira smut #bachira meguru #kunigami rensuke #kunigami smut #bl smut

[escha-evenstar]

I Lost Everything (In Monopoly)

Pairing: Azul Ashengrotto x GN!Reader

Summary: Azul sees you come home in tears, saying you lost everything (unaware you were referring to Monopoly). What happens?

Word Count: 800+

Notes:

Established relationship.

Suggestive themes ahead.

A/N:

Okay. So me and my cousin bought a Monopoly board game and we started playing every weekend. I suggested we make a scoreboard and have a competition. Like a championship! I won the first round which made me really happy. But, as usual, for me the first round is always a beginner's luck thing. Because after that, on the second round.. I got third place. And the third round, I was in last place! Uhuhuhu I cry TT And I'm such a competitive person. I do not like to lose!! >< And so this idea hit my mind, like, what if I say those things to Azul?

Azul was sitting on top of the bed, casually scrolling through and reading economic news on his tablet. You were currently out of the house for business, as per your words, though Azul knew you were just going to hang out for a bit with your friends.

When he heard the soft click of the door open, he turned off the screen and looked up from his tablet to greet you with a warm smile.

"Welcome back, sweet-"

Azul didn't get to finish his greeting as he was cut off with your anguished cry.

"Zuuuul!!" You wailed at him as you immediately rushed to your lover, holding him in a tight hug while burying your face on his chest.

Azul was shocked for a second before he wrapped his arms around you while rubbing your back to comfort you.

"What's wrong, my love? What's with the sad face? Did someone hurt you? Who do you want me to rope into a contract?" His voice laced with worry and slight anger to whoever made you cry.

You didn't respond right away. He could hear your sniffles before he felt you raise your head to look him in the eyes.

"It's my fault," you said.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"I lost everything. Our house. Our properties. Our money. Everything! All of our assets!!" You cried.

That got Azul confused. Did you really go out for business-business?

"I.. sniff.. I took a risk. I thought I would get back the money eventually and earn at least twice the amount I spent. Or maybe even more than that! But.." your voice faltered and your head bowed down in dejection. "Instead, I lost everything. And now, they're going to take me away."

Wait. Someone is going to take you away? Away from him?! Azul internally scoffed. As if he'd let that happen.

"That's not going to happen, sweetheart. Not while I'm here," he said to reassure you. In his head, Azul was already thinking of plans on how to punish that person that dare try to take you away from him.

"I wish that was the case. But.. We can't change what happened. Those are the rules. That's the reality. I lost. So they have the right to take me away," you said sadly.

Azul started to feel furious.

"No one has that right!" He held your chin with his fingers and made you look up at him, staring intensely in your eyes. "You're mine! Mine, and mine alone. Not a single person can take you away from me." Azul felt his blood boil. "Who is this person, Y/N? Tell me and I'll make sure they regret everything they did to you and for even daring to try take you away from me."

The sad expression on your face contorted into confusion. "Wait. What?"

"You said they'd take you away from me. I'm not letting that happen."

"Well, I said they'd take me away." You blinked, still confused. "As in.. take me away from the championship."

Azul was at a loss for words as his anger dissipated. He was back to being confused again.

"Championship?"

"Yeah. For Monopoly!"

Silence.

There was only silence as the two of you stared at each other.

You could see the gears in his head turning.

"So, when you said you lost everything.. you literally mean you lost everything.. because you went bankrupt? In Monopoly?" Azul said, trying to summarize what just happened to you.

You nodded.

"And if they're taking you away from the championship, so I assume it means you lost in the preliminary matches?"

"Well, yes. You don't have to say it out loud. You're going to make me cry again. You know I don't like to lose," you pouted. "I was really hoping to win."

There was another moment of silence before Azul broke into laughter.

"What?" You said, still pouting.

"You're really cute, you know that?" He said before stealing your lips for a kiss. "I thought someone was going to take you away from me. But it turned out they were just taking you away from the crown because you lost." He continued to give you kisses in-between.

"You're.. supposed to-" His kisses kept interrupting you. "-comfort me."

"And that's why I'm kissing you. To make you feel better." His kisses were starting to feel hot. "Is this not enough, sweetheart?" He stopped attacking your lips to gaze at your blushing face. From there, his blue eyes shined with a mischievous glint.

"Should I.. do more than just kissing? I can think of other ways to comfort you," he said while smirking at you.

You knew exactly what he was thinking.

"No teasing!!" You instantly covered his face, not wanting him to see the intense blush on your face.

Azul only chuckled at your actions before taking hold of your wrists away from his face and capturing your lips.

He kissed you.

Again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

Your mind started to forget about losing the game.

Because at this moment, all you could think about was him and the feeling of his lips against yours.

And that was a win.

#escha writes🩷 #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland #azul ashengrotto x reader #azul ashengrotto

[thepenultimateword]

Secret Santa 2023

For this year’s secret Santa I got @watercolorfreckles (I know you got mine too, but I promise I used a randomizer!) I’m sorry this is late, I’ve been traveling and just writing every chance I can get. I got a little overambitious and wrote several scenes instead of just one, so hopefully it doesn’t feel choppy and you like it!

"Hero's shy medic is the unsung and unappreciated glue that keeps the team together, magically repairing their every injury with her power to heal. What happens when Villain finds out how the hero's broken bones are always so quickly mending, and kidnaps the medic to utilize himself?"

Henchman was waiting in baggage claim when Villain arrived. His violet-dyed hair, thick mess of scars, and tall stature made him stand out against the crowd, but he still waved his whole arm over his head as Villain came through the doors.

Villain's glove creaked feelingless against his suitcase handle. This was getting tiresome. Probably for Henchman too. It was ridiculous that he insisted on picking him up from the airport every trip instead of looking for a new employer.

"Any luck?" Henchman said, seamlessly transferring Villain's bag into his own hand.

Villain's insides twisted. Maybe he should fire Henchman. That would force the underling to think about himself. Though Villain couldn't deny his reluctance to lose such loyalty. He wasn't sure he actually had the strength to enforce his own abandonment.

"Nah." He rubbed his numb hands together and forced a lighthearted tone. "Just another waste of money. I spent three weeks meditating away the damage, only for the so-called "power guru" to say I don't want to be healed. Apparently, if I did, I would have been able to banish the "bile" from my body."

Henchman gave the suitcase wheels a little bang against the ground. "Morons and scam artists.”

"Yes, well, it was a 50/50 shot in the first place. How's my bird?"

Henchman grimaced. "Still eating very little. She has stopped beating against her cage, but now she's very lethargic and despondent."

"You've tried cheering her up? Good food, nice things?"

"Yes, but she's not very chatty. Maybe we should have waited to get her until after your trip. This would have gone better with...some stability."

The automatic door swooshed open, and they stepped out into the chill winter air. Villain blew out a long cloudy breath and watched it disappear into the dreary, gray city landscape. Everything was so temporary. Here one moment, gone the next.

"The opportunity was too good," he said. "Besides, we couldn't leave her with our friend."

Hero had enough of an advantage without also having a decent healer on his side. No matter how many hits Villain divvied out, the heroic team always got back up unscathed. Perhaps without their golden goose, Villain could actually turn the tide. And maybe... Villain didn't want to get his hopes up, but maybe she could do something more too. He knew that Henchman knew that was the main reason he’d stolen her away in the first place. By this point he was just pretending to himself that there was a bigger purpose behind it all.

The crosswalk sign beeped its permission to cross the street, and Villain scanned the lot for Henchman's car, spotting its orangey paint job near the front.

"I am concerned she's been doing poorly this whole time. Why don't we stop by her enclosure first."

Henchman nodded and very kindly played along with the act that this was truly concern over an asset and not another cowardly excuse for himself. “I don’t think she’ll be very pleased to see you.”

She’s not going to help you.

“That’s alright.” Villain slid into the passenger seat. As Henchman loaded his suitcase into the trunk, he muttered under his breath, “I don’t have much left to lose.”

***

Villain called her Birdie.

Of course he knew her real title as Hero’s medic, but the nickname just encapsulated her so well.

So small. So skittish. Always flitting around the outskirts of a fight, the great folds of her medic’s cloak flapping at her sides like wings as she lighted briefly at each fallen party. The color was supposed to mark her as a noncombatant, take any targets of her back, but she had the instincts to remain wary always. Most villains didn’t follow the rules, and the gray was as likely to get her killed as not.

So why continue to wear it? Villain wondered, watching her through the one way glass of her cell's wall mirror. It was really more of a mini apartment than a cell--sitting room, bedroom, bathroom. The sitting room was the only room Villain could view into, but he doubted whether Medic knew that. Perhaps it was riskier to give a hostage so much blind space, but anyone worth keeping around couldn't be kept like any regular prisoner. Though, from the looks of it, Medic wasn't exactly grateful for the thoughtful accommodations.

She sat with her face buried in her knees, grey cloak nearly swallowing her little curled up body whole. He'd asked Henchman to prepare daily clothes changes, and the peeking green edge of sleeve implied she'd been taking them, but the cloak remained the same.

Villain moved around to the front of the cell and drew back the bolt on the otherwise regular door, taking a breath before swinging it open with a flourish. “Hello, Birdie.”

The woman leaped a little, head shooting up and fixing him in the inky black pools that were her eyes.

“Sorry for the delay." He locked the door behind him as casually as he could manage. "I’ve been out of town. But now we can finally chat."

Medic blinked then turned her chin into her shoulder.

Villain plopped down on the couch a couple feet away from her place on the rug. "Apparently you haven't been eating properly. Is the food not up to standard? Can I get you something else? Any favorite meals or treats?"

Medic didn't turn or respond.

"Hmm...what do birdies like. Worms?"

The healer's lip curled a little but still nothing.

"How about chocolate? Steak? Fruit tarts?"

Medic only tucked her chin tighter.

"Alright, I get it. The nice treatment doesn't work on you. Unfortunately, I don't have a mean treatment. Not for you at least. I can't asks favors from someone by relying on fear."

That got her attention. She still didn't unfold, but her eyes watched him sideways. Wary but curious. What could a villain need from a healer. He must have his own, so why her? She didn't need to speak for her thoughts to clutter the air.

"No, I can't just tell you," Villain said with a loud sigh. "You might go tell that precious hero team. I know you're quiet, but I don't believe for a second you're that quiet."

Medic swiveled her shoulders ever so slightly. "How...?"

Her voice was not so birdlike. Short yes, but like a rasped breath than a chirp. Still...

Villain grinned. "The very best of ways: by pretending I knew what you were thinking. Throw out a guess and you'll be right 80% percent of the time. That's also a guess by the way, I haven't actually researched the subject."

Medic retreated back into her cloak.

Darn.

Either he was totally unhumorous, or Medic was just that hard to entertain. Then again, she'd seemed interested by the prospect of a supernatural ability. She'd only clammed up again once she got the simple explanation for her question. She should've already known his Gift from the fights she'd witnessed, though he had held bad considerably this last year.

"You're not like other medics," he said, redirecting the conversation. "You have a Gift, don't you? And don't deny it, I've seen the recovery your patients. Scarless, rapid, perfect. One fight I saw a hero putting full weight on what, minutes previously, had been broken femur."

"And that's why you want me?" Medic squeezed her hands together, nails digging into the back of her knuckles like each word spoken aloud pained her. "Because I'm better than your medics? You want me to turncoat?"

"Not entirely. I took you because your good, yes. So good you've kept that ragtag trash hero team up and running way longer than it should have ever been allowed to go. Hero needs to be stopped."

Nothing.

"I'm going to the statue unveiling tonight." He watched her face closely. "I'm going to break it. And while I'm at it, break him."

"He's not that fragile," Medic said, her voice hushing a little further, and her brow furrowing.

"Ah, you know because you've tried?"

"I know because I' m his medic and I know how much treatment each fight requires." It came out quite a bit snappier than Villain expected and Medic must have realized it too because she set her jaw and looked away again. "I can't help you."

Villain pushed himself back to his feet. The declaration was firm, but hardly the denial of a truly devoted team member. Or maybe he was just reading to hard into things. Medic was shy. Maybe she wanted to make herself clear in as few words as possible. But if there was a chance only her fear was holding her back...

"I'll let you know how it goes," Villain said. With that, he made his way back outside the cell, bolting the door behind him with fumbling fingers. He flexed his hands a couple times, as if to warm them back to full function, but they felt as clumsy and disconnected as always. He shoved them gloved into his coat pockets.

Don't think about that. You have a hero to fight.

***

Villain couldn't feel his shoulders. He'd definitely overdone it. He'd overestimated his ability to fight with his arms as damaged as they were and he had relied too much on the power he'd been so careful to conserve.

He stumbled hard against Medic's door, sliding weakly to his knees. He didn't know why he came here. Henchman was probably having a fit searching for him after he'd bolted. Most of those heroes laid in shattered pieces at the scene. Or at least, parts of them did. Villain had found long ago that his Gift--the power to turn whatever he willed to stone--could be used strategically. The loss of limbs was usually enough to make a hero retire, no need to end a whole life. He wouldn't have minded ending Hero, but once again, the leader was the only one who escaped unscathed. Too this day Villain had only ever managed to take a pinky. It was a wonder no one found that suspicious.

Villain slammed his fist against the cell door, or more like tapped. He stifled a sob. “I don’t want to die.”

Not yet. Not without bringing down Hero’s deceit.

Villain strained to reach the bolt, fumbling it twice before finally jostling it outward. He practically collapsed onto Medic’s rug.

Dark spots clouded his vision but suddenly cool hands were running trails down his face.

“Villain?”

Medic?

No wait, the door…he needed to close…why was she still here?

“Uuughh…” Villain rolled into her knees. “It did not go well.”

“What did he do?”

“Besides use every other person as a shield?”

“I mean to your face.”

Villain squinted up into Medic’s dark eyes, so deep and concerned and…and infinite.

“My face,” he mumbled.

“Are these bruises?” Her fingers trailed a second time down his cheek. “It looks painful.”

“It’s in my face?” Villain barely restrained a wail.

“Villain,” Medic said firmly, her quiet rasp getting almost loud. “What happened? Do you need healing?”

Villain’s throat felt thick and swollen, too sticky to get out words. Of course he needed healing. But if she couldn’t help him…he didn’t know if he could take another failure. He didn’t know if his body could take it.

He extended his hand. When Medic only stared, he nodded at the black, fitted glove.

Medic’s thumb worked under the edge. Villain felt nothing but he imagined her fingers felt just as gentle as they had on his cheek.

She gasped.

Villain glanced at the bare skin for only a moment. The once caramel colored palm now a deep ebony. Like something rotten. Like something dead.

“Villain?”

Villain cleared his throat, fighting the words upward. “All powers have a price.” He forced himself to look at blighted appendage. “Mine’s is killing me.”

Medic turned his hand over in her own. “How long?”

“Always. It used to just be a little. Nails. Hair. Parts I could cut off. Then it hit skin…and it won’t stop. I can’t feel; I can hardly move. And no one…” He choked. “I’m going to die. All from trying too hard to rid the world of Hero, and I couldn’t even finish him tonight.”

Medic rested her fingers on the cuff of Villain’s sleeve, eyes meeting Villain's with some unspoken request for permission.

Villain nodded.

Medic's nimble fingers gently picked at the button, freeing the fabric and rolling it up to his elbow. Villain’s eyes widened along with hers. What had once had been dark veins was now as pitch black his hands. From the nothingness in his shoulders it was probably no different above the elbow.

Medic felt gently at the half-petrifaction. Most people, even his most loyal were afraid of the blight. Henchman was unfazed, but the previous medic had quit rather than admit they didn't want anywhere near Villain. And yet Medic touched him willingly.

“You can’t fix it, can you?” Villain said, practically plead. He didn’t care anymore. Even with the doubt in his gut and in his voice. He just needed help.

“I…I might…” Medic said.

“But Hero wouldn’t like it.”

Medic ducked her head. “It’s not that. Well, no…you’re right, he wouldn’t, but he wouldn’t have to know. And there are no specific rules that say I can’t heal a villain, it’s just…”

Villain blinked groggily up at her as she chewed her bottom lip.

“Like you said, all powers have a price.”

“And this one is too much,” Villain said.

“Yes, well, no. I don’t know.” She glanced toward the open door. “Maybe there’s a better healer…”

Villain closed his eyes, practically sinking with resignation. “No. Already tried. I don’t think I have the energy to search anymore.” He clasped numb fingers around his numb arm. “Or the time.”

A long silence stretched between them.

“It’s alright, Birdie. Fly away.”

It didn’t matter who she told now.

Medic pushed him carefully off her lap, clothes rustling as she rose. Two steps sounded toward the door way and then stopped.

“I’m not supposed to…but I’ll do it.”

Villains eyes shot open. “You will?”

Medic sucked in her lips but nodded. “Just…don’t tell.”

She knelt beside him, long gray cloak fanning out around her. The second glove peeled off easier than the first, and she held both hands in hers.

He’d always wondered what it felt it like to experience one of her gifted healings.

It was warm. Like drinking something hot. It spread from head to toe, and the numbness leeched out little by little. The skin lightened from black to charcoal from charcoal to heather grey from grey to brown.

Medic’s hands turned soft in his grip. He squeezed them lightly, his mouth parting in disbelief at the feeling of pressure of warmth of regular mobility. When he sat up, it came easy. Tears sprang to his eyes.

“You did it! You actually did it! Medic, you are—“

He stopped at the sight of her slumping figure. Sweat rolled down her temples, her face was flushed, and her teeth were grit as if in agony.

“Birdie?”

Medic only shivered.

“Birdie. Birdie, are you alright?”

Villain reached out, but she lurched back, stumbling toward the back corner. Veiny blackness spread from her fingertips, trailing up the creases in her skin. Her shoulders trembled. A small vein popped out of from her forehead. And she glared at the blight. Not like someone afraid of it, but like someone who’d like to peel it off and throw it away. Or burn it.

“No!” she cried and slammed both palms against the wall mirror with a feral cry. Immediately the glass crackled and, like a rolling wave, turned to cold, hard stone.

The black faded from dark ebony to a tan spot only

A few shades darker than her skin. She still glared.

Villain gaped. “You… That’s what I do. How did you do what I do? Did I…? Did you…?”

Medic’s eyes darted toward the door.

Villain jumped in front of it first. “Hey hey hey! I’m not going to tell!”

Another guess but apparently the right one because Medic’s shouldered untensed a fraction.

“I’m not going to tell,” Villain repeated. “I just… How?”

Medic wrapped her cloak tighter around herself. Her eyes had taken on a glazed shine suspiciously alike to unshed tears.

“It’s not exactly healing,” she murmured. “More like stealing. Taking injuries and making them mine.”

“The price.”

She nodded. “But this sort of injury…made from a Gift, it doesn’t work the same. It’s more like a build up of power concentrated in one place. And now that it’s mine…I can do what I like with it.”

Villain cocked his head. “And that’s…bad?”

“I don’t work for Hero,” Medic said. “I’m on the team because he’s supposed to watch me. Stop me from doing things like this.”

“Becoming too powerful?”

“Becoming a villain.”

Villain might have laughed if she didn’t actually look so scared. He took her hands carefully, savoring the sensation of skin on skin warmth once again. He fixed her with a hard stare that she seemed uncertain to hold or shy away from. He smiled, the first real one in a long time.

“What’s wrong with villains?”

Medic swallowed, looking away but not pulling back her hands. Her voice came out very quiet. “I guess…not everything.”

#villain x medic #villain x civilian #hero x villain #heroes and villains #creative writing #writblr #writeblr #secret santa #agggh I couldn’t figure out how to end it #and I’ve been in a bit of a block #so it was a bit tough #but ah well #it was a fun premise to explore!

[sugurusluts]

Zuko x mercenary!reader -part one

Do people still read Zuko x reader fics?

Mostly for my own amusement bc Zukos adorable- longer than my usual stuff! ♡︎

Warnings: none

————————————————————————

They had followed our little gang around the world, so it wasn’t hard to imagine they’d track Aang here, but they didn’t seem in any mood to strike.

I couldn’t help but feel defensive of the kingdom, even if the two were doing nothing but serving tea. I worked as a mercenary for whatever town seemed to need assistance. Despite not knowing any form of bending, I had connections, and that made me an asset.

Having worked around this place more times than I could count, I knew almost everyone. Most of everyone around town were good people, the type to invite you over for dinner just for giving them a hand in the fields.

Knowing someone like Zuko was around them made me uneasy, that was until Iroh approached me.

“Ah, a mercenary! What mercenary wouldn’t want to help a poor frail old man?” He whined dramatically, from behind me.

“Iroh” my hand tightened on my sword, I assumed there was an unspoken rule that neither group would bother eachother if they truly wanted to live in peace. Maybe I misread this dynamic?

“Good to see you too Y/N, you can losen your grip, im not here to fight you. I couldn’t care less about the Avatar, you know that”

I tilted my head in confusion, what else would he be here for? I couldn’t bring myself to believe he was now a hard working humble business man.

“Would you mind talking to me for just a minute, I’ll make it worth your while” he grinned, holding out a few gold coins he scrounged out of his pockets.

I caved from curiosity, following him as he walked me through a crowd, far away from his new little shop, leading me to a small alley.

“So..why did we have to go to an alleyway for this? Are you gonna mug me?”

“No such thing, I actually have a job for you”

I scoffed, the fuck made him think I’d want to take work from him? I turned on my heel, disappointed at the lack of information he gave me.

“Zuko’s lonely!”

I stopped in my tracks, turning back to Iroh, dumbfounded.

“Zuko’s lonely?”

“Painfully so, you know how hard it is to watch my nephew be such an introvert at his age?”

I rolled my eyes, “what does any of this have to do with me exactly?”

“Well, you could possibly help the poor boy out, couldn’t you?”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m asking you to ask him on a date”

“…”

“…”

Jesus fucking Christ he can’t be serious right now.

“You want me to ask the guy who’s tried to kill my friend more times than I can count on a date?”

“Precisely!”

“…Iroh, I’m not a prostitute, I’m not asking Zuko out for cash. He wouldn’t even agree to it either, he’d recognize me.”

The man sighed, pulling out a fabric bag filled to the brim with gold coins. God Zuko was a lost cause.

“Lay on the charm, and maybe he will!”

He dropped the bag in my hand, holy shit was it heavy..

“…fine”

I never thought I’d end up asking Zuko, the fire lords son out on a date, but here we are.

I sauntered into the tea shop, greeting locals as I made my way to where Zuko was pouring.

Carefully filling the cup, he didn’t notice as I leaned against the counter he was behind. I rested my chin in my hands, looking him up and down.

It has been quite a while since I saw him last, longer hair suited him.

When he finally noticed me, he took a double take, stumbling while trying to hold the cup steady.

“…Y/N..?” He asked almost timidly, as if he didn’t want to believe I was standing infront of him.

“Hey, you remember my name, aren’t you sweet?”

He went quiet, still staring at me as if he was seeing a ghost. He pushed past me, going to deliver tea to a table. What a good little worker.

He returned to where I was standing, starting to wash dishes, ignoring my presence.

“What’s your name?”

“..what?”

“Your name, you’re not still going by Zuko here are you?”

He flinched as I used his real name, his eyes flicking between mine and his dishes.

“..Lee. Why are you here?”

“Can’t I visit my favorite prince?”

He stiffened at the praise. “…are you planning on fighting me?”

“No, the opposite actually”

He furrowed his eyebrows in a surprisingly cute fashion.

“Going from Avatar hunter to waiter must be a real boring change of pace for you, huh?”

He didn’t answer, still washing dishes.

“How about you let me make it more interesting for you?”

“..what?”

“I’m asking you out Lee”

He didn’t say anything to that. He simply blinked comedically, his eyes wide.

I gave him time, I wasn’t going to rush him. Iroh did not have the same curtsy.

“Ah welcome to our Shop miss, what tea do you fancy?”

“..I’m not the biggest fan of tea, I’m here because I fancy something else”

Zukos face turned an impossible shade of red, I thought steam may come out of ears if I kept this up.

“Oh? And what are you referring to?” Iroh couldn’t keep the smile off his face.

“Your nephew of course”

“Oh! Well a night out couldn’t hurt, right Lee?”

He whipped his head back and forth between his uncle and I in disbelief.

“Uncle, you know who this is don’t you?!”

Iroh studied me up and down.

“A humble mercenary looking for a date?”

“You’re exactly right” I smiled knowingly at Iroh, despite him technically being my enemy this exchange was a little fun.

“I don’t see why not Lee! Aren’t they cute?” Iroh gestured to me as if this was completely normal.

“Yeah Lee, aren’t I cute?” *i lean over the counter, invading his personal space.

Poor thing was absolutely floored as he whipped his head between me and Iroh trying to figure out if he was the weird one for being suspicious.

“If this is some sort of ploy to-“ he glares me, but it’s hard to take him seriously with such a red face.

“-I’ll pay for dinner, alright? All you have to do is have fun and look pretty. How about I come back at 7?” I didn’t know I had this much game until now. Why wasn’t I using this power for good before?

“The Shop will be closed by then, no reason to decline” Iroh looks up at his flustered nephew. How long would it take for the poor boy to crack?

“..fine..if you’re not here by exactly seven, I’m not going”

What a brat.. this was going to be an interesting date.

“I’ll be on time, don’t worry your pretty little head. I have business to attend to, I’ll be seeing you Lee” I wink at him, amused at how..affection starved he seemed.

He spun back around, his back facing me, but I could see the blush on his face starting to reach his neck..

Iroh was going to owe me much more than a bag of coins for this.

#zuko #zuko avatar #zuko smut #zuko x reader #avatar #avatar the last airbender #atla #general iroh #fem reader #male reader #nb reader #x reader

[paleprincessturtle]

The Sorrow of Tomorrow

Part 1

Note: I actually got this idea from a request. I won't attach the request here because I don't wanna spoil the ending as I'm making this into a 2 parts story. But I will definitely attach the request once I finish the second part.

Pairing: Harvey Specter x Female Character (she) Warning: Curse words, blood.

It was a little over a year ago when Jessica called Harvey to his office. Her face was unreadable as usual. “You wanted to see me?” Jessica nodded and motioned for him to sit on the couch. “Here,” Jessica handed him the blue folder. Harvey flipped it open and on the first page, he sighed. “You know I’m not a divorce attorney. I took Esther’s case because of Louis,” he closed the folder and placed it on the table. “She’s a close friend of mine,” Jessica said quietly. “This divorce is messy, I need you on it.” Jessica gave her a hard look. “I helped Esther with her divorce because she’s Louis’ sister. I won’t handle another divorce case, Jessica,” Harvey said, jaw clenched. Harvey was ready to leave when Jessica said, “She was my shrink,” Jessica said quietly as if someone might hear. “Psychiatrist?” “Psychologist.”

“How was she your psychologist and a close friend of yours? Us and them, we have the same code.” Jessica nodded, ready to explain herself. “It started around a year ago. I couldn’t sleep at night, nightmares,” Jessica paused and Harvey gave her a small smile of encouragement. After dealing with panic attacks himself, Harvey knew how hard shits like this might get. “I went to over a dozen psychiatrists and psychologists. I saw no improvements. All I saw was how much they wanted to keep me in their pockets. Then my sister recommended a psychologist, she promised me she would be different. So I went to see her. It all went well. I started to see real improvements and 3 months ago, she terminated our agreement. She told me I could walk on my own. She didn’t keep me in her pocket, Harvey. She actually cared for me.” She sighed and leaned back. “Since then we have seen each other a lot. I confided in her as a friend. And 2 weeks ago she told me her husband was cheating. She filed for divorce and her husband wanted to take all their marital assets. Including a clinic she owned. She asked me to be her lawyer but I cared too much about her, my judgment won’t be as clear as yours. So please, Harvey. I owe this woman the peace I have right now.” Harvey nodded as he took the folder with him.

2 days later, Harvey prepared himself to meet with his client for the first time. Harvey went to the conference room before he opened the door, he saw a woman standing by the window. Harvey opened the door and she turned around to see whoever entered the room. Harvey was taken aback. She was younger than he expected her to be. Her hair was long and flowy and her smile was bright, despite the circumstances. Harvey shook his head, a bright smile? He must not have gotten enough sleep last night to have thought about a smile that can be bright. “Mrs. Seward,” Harvey extended his hand. She scoffed but shook his hand. “Harvey Specter,” she nodded, then again smiled. “Please don’t call me Mrs. Seward. And nice to finally meet the source of Jessica’s headache.” Harvey raised an eyebrow at her snarky comment as he watched her sit herself in one of the chairs. Harvey shook the thought of how attractive this woman was. “Okay, so tell me more about this scumbag of a soon-to-be ex-husband of yours.”

3 months after that, they were sitting in a fancy restaurant. It was indeed a nasty divorce and took 3 months to finalize. And they were celebrating the long-awaited win. “Harvey, I really would like to thank you. You really worked hard on this,” Harvey scoffed. “Don’t mention it, it’s my job.” She shook her head, “I want to thank you still.” For a few minutes, they were just sitting there in silence. Enjoying the mere presence of each other. “However,” Harvey started, having her full attention. “I think I couldn’t be your lawyer anymore.” Her eyebrows knitted in confusion. “Am I not paying you enough?” She joked but earned not even a smile from Harvey. “I couldn’t be your lawyer anymore because I want to date you,” Harvey said nonchalantly as if the piece of information he just shared wasn’t even important. “Come again?” she asked in disbelief. “I want to date you. And I can’t date you if you’re still my client. The last thing I need is to get disbarred over a pretty girl,” Harvey smirked as he took her hand and earned the brightest smile from her.

Around 8 months later, Harvey got his ex-client to be his girlfriend. Who would have thought?

Donna was wiping the sweat on her forehead from following Harvey’s order. Harvey’s been barking orders left and right. He was especially on edge today. God knows what pissed him off this time. Donna’s best guess was that Judge Campbell wasn’t cooperating with Harvey’s plan and now he had to whip out a new one. But, Donna had also whipped out a plan to tame Harvey. Donna kept looking over her table. Couldn’t wait for one more second for her plan to arrive. “Donna!” Harvey called again as she sighed and was about to walk over to her boss’ office. That was when she saw her plan arriving. Donna thanked all the Gods above. Donna’s plan scurried to her in her red bottoms. “You’re a lifesaver! I’m sorry to have called you on working hours. But Harvey has been unexpectedly mean today. He just barked my name not 2 seconds ago.” Donna faked a pout. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of Harvey. And sorry he was mean all day.” Donna smiled and told her not to worry about it. Donna’s plan walked quietly to Harvey’s office. Harvey was facing the window, clearly deep in thought. She didn’t even knock, just invited herself in. “Donna, I called you minutes ago. Is it that damn hard to come here when I called?” Harvey swiveled in his chair and his face instantly softened at the sight of his girlfriend. “If that’s how you talked to Donna, you should give her a raise,” she smiled as she sat across from him. “You’re definitely not on my schedule today,” Harvey joked as he flipped through his calendar. “Should I call the security?” Harvey smirked. He watched her and she stood up from the chair. Harvey moved his chair back, away from his desk. She sat on Harvey’s lap as the both of them stared at each other. She brought her thumb to the crease between his eyebrows and smoothed it. “I’m sorry, today must be hard. Plan didn’t go well with Campbell?” Harvey nodded as he closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment. “It’s 6. Let’s leave. A tired mind is not a good mind. We can stop to have dinner,” she stopped the movement of her thumb and Harvey opened his eyes. Looked longingly at his girlfriend. She leaned in and whispered in his ear, “And then, you could do whatever you wanna do to me,” she left a soft kiss just behind his ear before abruptly standing up. Harvey shivered from the kiss. He closed his laptop so fast and was ready to leave. He saw that his girlfriend already standing by Donna’s desk and he heard Donna vaguely thanked her over something. “Come on,” Harvey said as he put his hand on the small of her back. “Thanks, Donna. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Donna nodded and the two women hugged as they shared farewell. Harvey took her hand as he walked a bit faster than usual. “Easy tiger,” she laughed as Harvey followed. “Hey, guys!” Harvey sighed at the sound of the familiar woman that stopped the both of them.

“Jessica!” Harvey sighed once again as his girlfriend let go of his hand and walked in the opposite direction of the elevator. Harvey reluctantly followed her. They were hugging when Harvey reached the two of them. “Been so long since I saw you!” she said to Jessica. “If anything you’re the one busy with Harvey,” Jessica smirked at her as her face reddened. Harvey also smirked at the sight of his girl’s reddened face. The three of them were in a conversation when they heard the elevator door open and then close.

“WHERE IS HARVEY SPECTER?”

The loud shout startled the three of them if not everyone nearby. Harvey stiffened at the sight of his girlfriend’s ex-husband. Harvey instinctively moved her girlfriend behind him. “Jeffry”, she whispered in disbelief. Jessica ran inside her office to call security as all of them knew, he meant harm. Upon seeing Harvey and his ex-wife, Jeffry walked really fast over them. “So what I heard was right. You are having an affair with your lawyer. I always knew you are a bitch,” Jeffry was ready to lunge at her when Harvey stopped him. He towered over him. “Leave and I’ll pretend this never happened.” Although Harvey’s voice was low, it was laced with venom. “Don’t you dare tell me what I should do when you helped her ruin my life.” They were standing nose to nose. Both were seething. “You are nothing but a bastard,” Jeffry said before he punched his jaw. Harvey fell to the floor, followed by the shriek of his girlfriend. “Jeffry, please. Just leave,” she tried to reason with him. Stalling time until the security arrived. Harvey was about to get back on his feet when he saw it. The knife. He heard nothing but the blood-curdling scream of the woman he loved more than life. He saw everything in slow motion. The white shirt his girlfriend wore turned a sickening shade of red. The security tackled Jeffry. Jessica got beside her, now lying on the floor barely conscious. Harvey couldn’t really hear anything, everything got blurry. He felt like he tried to breathe underwater. He tried to move, to get to his girlfriend. But he felt like his limbs were chained. Suddenly it was Mike’s face he saw in front of him, with a glass of water. “Harvey, drink!” Mike was half screaming. “Snap out of it, Harvey. You can’t have the panic attack now, she needs you,” Harvey took a generous gulp of the water as he brought himself back to reality. Then everything slowly became clear. Jessica got his girlfriend’s head on her lap. Mike watched him, making sure he was okay now. The pool of blood underneath her was the one that snapped Harvey. He quickly got beside her and took her in his arms. “Oh God, Jessica. She’s going to die,” Harvey said as he pulled his girlfriend closer as if she might fade away. “Harvey, calm down. We’ve called the 911.” Harvey barely listened to Jessica as he removed whatever clothing was put on top of the wound to stop the bleeding. He took off his suit jacket and pressed hard on her wound. Harvey watched her face, he saw colors draining from her face. He felt her skin getting cold. He heard her quiet, labored breathing. “I…” Harvey’s voice trailed off. “I lo- love you so much, baby. Please, please don’t leave me, please. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Frustrated tears flow because Harvey knew, there was nothing he could do.

Part 2 here.

MASTERLIST

#harvey specter #harvey specter imagine #harvey specter fan fiction #harvey specter x reader #harvey specter imagines #suits harvey specter #harvey specter fanfic #suits tv

[pinchofhoney]

You know I can't stay away from your writing for long so here I am againnn....angst prompt 5 and fluff promt 10. Besties to loverss plsssss.....with either Sirius Black or Kaz I can't choose

No angst...I can't take it rnnnn 😭

take a hint # 200 followers special event

» prompt event » special events masterlist

angst prompt five: “please leave before i lose myself to madness and beg you to stay”

fluff prompt ten: and it was when A watched B look at someone else the way they wanted to be looked at. does A realize how much in love with their best friend they were?

gif is not mine, credit to the owner

kaz brekker x fem!reader

word count: 3.8k

warning: kaz has no romantic feelings for inej in this one, it doesn't have a specific time in the canon, i made up one of the characters, best friends to lovers (between the lines), mention of murder

summary: It seems that Kaz always expects you to read between the lines, even though you are a thief and not an expert in interpreting written texts.

a/n: whenever i see notifications from you, i feel like a happy golden retriever puppy, hello!!<33 i feel that writing anything with sirius would be easier for me in almost every way, especially since that character has been my favorite since childhood, but i wanted to try something new and i was thrilled with the chance to do so! (it's a mess)

pages that may interest you: masterlist ♡ taglist ♡ who i write for

As you stepped out into the gloomy, rain-soaked streets of Ketterdam, you could felt the weight of the city's bearing down upon you. It was a place where danger lurked around every corner, where crime and corruption were the norm, and where only the strongest and most cunning survived. The city's winding, labyrinthine streets were treacherous and difficult to navigate, with slimy cobblestones that seemed to shift and writhe beneath your feet. The stench of sewage and decay hanged heavy in the air, a reminder of the filth and squalor that permeated every inch of the city.

The people of Ketterdam were a rough and ragged bunch, with sharp tongues and even sharper knives. Every interaction was a potential threat, every stranger a possible enemy. It was a place where trust was hard to come by, and betrayal was always just a heartbeat away. And yet, despite all of this, you couldn't help but feel drawn to the city. It was the only place where you've ever felt truly at home, where you could be yourself without fear of judgment or rejection. It was a feeling that both comforted and terrified you, and you knew that you'll never be able to escape it, no matter how hard you try.

You hated Ketterdam with a passion, yet you found yourself unable to imagine living anywhere else. Maybe it was because you hated yourself too, the mere thought of being ordinary filled you with a deep-seated loathing. You had no talents, no skills that could make others look at you with admiration, and to make matters worse, you weren't your parents' favorite child either. That distinction belonged to your older sister, the Grisha who had always been showered with adoration and affection, even when she was away in the Little Palace, thousands of miles from home.

Your parents had always compared you to her, highlighting your shortcomings and making you feel like a disappointment. Even when she was gone, they treated you worse than they ever had before, as if you brought them shame just by existing.

Yet, in Ketterdam, your ordinariness was a blessing. As a member of a gang of thieves, you were the perfect fit. Your lack of beauty and grace made you unremarkable, allowing you to blend into the shadows and avoid attention. You moved with ease through the convoluted streets of the city, navigating its twists and turns, always keeping your wits about you. Of course, there were a times of doubts, where you couldn't help but think that perhaps being strikingly beautiful would be an asset to your profession, especially when robbing wealthy merchants who came to Ketterdam seeking to indulge in its illicit pleasures. But even then, you knew that such a gift would come with its own set of complications, and in Ketterdam, complications were the last thing you needed.

You pulled the hood of your dark cloak over your head, lowering it slightly to obscure your face. You didn't want to be recognized by anyone, but at the same time, you needed to keep an eye on your surroundings and react quickly if needed.

You hastily tucked your frozen hands into the pockets of your coat and quickened your step as you saw two men who were part of the Dime Lions. Your heart skipped a beat as you recognized them. Lately, you had been avoiding these people more than usual, ever since you got into an unnecessary street fight with several members of the gang. They had made it clear that they weren't happy with you, and you knew that they wouldn't hesitate to attack you if given the chance.

But it wasn't just the Dime Lions that you were avoiding. Some people in Ketterdam knew about things they shouldn’t. It was no secret that rumors spread like wildfire in this city, and often found their way into the hands of those who would use them for their own gain. But in a world full of terrible people, you had to be worse.

You walked with no clear destination in mind, driven by the need to distance yourself as much as possible from the Crow Club. It was only moments ago that you had found yourself in a heated argument with the one person who mattered the most to you. His stubborn pride had come between you once again, making you curse his name to the heavens above.

The tension in the hallway was thick enough to cut with a knife as you and Kaz stood facing each other, both seething with frustration. His eyes glinted in the dim light, anger etched deep into the lines of his face. What had started as a minor disagreement had quickly escalated into a full-blown argument, fueled by the unspoken feelings that both tried to hide.

“You don't understand, Y/N,” Kaz growled, his voice low and scratchy. “You never do. You're always off on your own, thinking you know what's best for everyone. You can't keep taking unnecessary risks. It's not just your life on the line.”

“I know that,” you snapped back, your eyes flashing with anger. “But we can’t just sit back and do nothing. We need to take action if we want to survive.”

“Of course we need to take action,” Kaz shot back, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “I'm not saying we should do nothing. But we need to be smart about it. We can't rush in blindly. That's why I'm in charge. I know what I'm doing.”

You rolled your eyes, exasperated. “Sometimes being smart means taking risks. That's how we get ahead.”

A heavy silence hung in the air between you, filled only by the sound of your breathing and the rustle of your clothes. Kaz's gaze bore into you with an intensity that made your skin crawl.

His jaw tightened, and he spoke through gritted teeth. “Fine,” he said, his voice icy. “Do whatever you want. But don't expect me to follow you blindly into danger.”

You took a step closer to Kaz, your eyes blazing. “I don't need you to follow me, Kaz. I can take care of myself.”

His eyes narrowed, and he took a step back, his hand on his cane for support. “Then go ahead and do that. But please, leave before I lose myself to madness and beg you to stay.”

Your chest tightened with hope as Kaz's words registered in your mind. Could it be that he actually wanted you to stay? But your hopes were dashed as you saw him turn his back and begin walking away. The urge to call out to him, to make him admit his feelings, consumed you, but you knew it was pointless. Kaz Brekker was not one to bare his soul.

With a frustrated growl, you clenched your fists so tightly that your nails dug painfully into your palms. Without another word, you turned and stormed down the stairs. Ignoring Jesper's questioning gaze and Wylan's confused expression, you burst out into the rain-soaked streets of the Barrel, letting the cool droplets wash away your anger and frustration.

Your mind was a chaotic mess of emotions as you walked, all directed towards the one man who had the power to make you feel so much. Kaz's words echoed in your head, spoken in his rough voice, which usually sounded like the most beautiful melody to your ears, but now it was a curse that tormented you and did not allow you to find peace.

“I don't need you, Kaz. You're the last person I want,” you muttered under your breath, and as if fate was playing a game, you bumped into the very person with whom the whole argument began. What a coincidence.

You lifted your gaze, and your eyes met with the one who infamously called himself Ketterdam's most dangerous person. Although he didn't know you, you were familiar with him well enough to know that he would want to have you with him despite your undistinguished appearance and lack of special skills.

In a rush of panic, you lowered your head, feigning humility to mask your face. “I apologize, sir,” you began, trying to hide the hint of fear you could sense in your voice. “I should be more careful.”

The man smirked, his eyes scanning over your form. “It's no problem, sweetheart,” he said, his voice oozing with arrogance and entitlement. “But you should watch where you're going. It's not safe to be wandering around these parts alone.” His hand brushed against your arm, sending shivers down your spine.

You flinched at the touch, trying to pull away from him, but then he grabbed you. You knew what type of man he was, and the last thing you wanted was to be alone with him in a dark alley. You tried to think of an excuse to leave, but before you could say anything, the gravelly rasp of a familiar voice interrupted.

“Is there a problem here, gentlemen?” Kaz's voice was calm and controlled, but there was an underlying threat that made the man release his grip on you and take a step back.

“None at all,” the man replied smoothly.

Kaz stepped closer, his eyes narrowing. “I suggest you leave the lady alone then.”

The man scoffed. “I suggest you mind your own business, boy.”

Kaz's hand, covered with a leather glove, tightened on the crow's head ornamenting his cane. “I'll make it my business if I see someone harassing a woman in my city.”

The man sneered, clearly not intimidated by Kaz's threat. “Your city?” he asked with a hint of derision, studying Kaz more thoughtfully. Suddenly, as if he had just connected the dots, he added, “Last time I checked, it was still called Ketterdam, not Dirtyhands's kingdom.”

Kaz's expression didn't change, but you could sense the tension in the air. “Believe what you want, but if you don't leave now, I'll make sure you regret it.”

The man seemed to consider his options for a moment before finally releasing a grunt of annoyance and walking away, oblivious to the inevitable fate that awaited him regardless of his decision. Death was the only possible outcome and the only variable was who would carry out the execution.

Finally, the man was out of sight, and you released a breath you didn't even realize you were holding. Kaz turned to you, and you met his gaze with a mixture of gratitude and anger. Despite feeling indebted to him for his intervention, you couldn't help but feel frustrated by his interference. “I didn't need your help,” you said, trying to sound confident.

Kaz raised an eyebrow. “It sure looked like you did.”

You glared at him, feeling embarrassed and exposed. He had seen you in a moment of vulnerability, and you hated yourself for it. “I could have handled it,” you insisted, although you knew it was a lie. You couldn't have handled the situation on your own. You were a skilled thief, but you lacked the physical strength to overpower a man twice your size. You were not armed with revolvers, nor did you possess the abilities of a Corpsewitch. You were just an average person, with quick fingers and the ability to pick locks, nothing more.

“How did you know where to find me?” you added.

“Did you think I wouldn't follow you? I had a feeling you'd get yourself into trouble, but I didn't expect it to happen so soon.”

You rolled your eyes, but a small part of you was grateful that Kaz had your back. “And what about-”

“Inej will take care of him,” he said, cutting you off, signaling that he didn't want to discuss the matter any further. “Let's head back to the Slat. You're soaked.”

Kaz started walking away, disappearing into a dark alley without waiting for you. You sighed and followed him, feeling the dampness of your clothes sticking to your skin.

The walk back to the Slat was silent, with only the sound of raindrops hitting the cobblestones to fill the air. As you entered the place, you immediately noticed the curious looks of your crewmates. Jesper was there, even though he usually preferred gambling at the Crows Cub and Matthias stood at the top of the stairs, watching you with his arms crossed. It seemed like everyone was waiting for you to return, and you couldn't help but feel uneasy.

Ignoring the greetings, Kaz announced, “You'll never guess who Y/N met.” The room fell silent, and Kaz removed his hat as if to emphasize his point. “Antoon Beudeker.”

A hum of surprised sounds ran through the room, and all eyes turned to you. You felt uncomfortable being the center of attention. You had been trying to track down Beudeker for weeks, but he always managed to slip away from you, as if someone in the Dregs was tipping him off about your plans.

Nina spoke up, breaking the silence. “What do you mean by that?”

Kaz looked at you, not bothering to hide his annoyance. “A talent for stealing isn't Y/N's only skill. As you can see, the talent for trouble far outweighs it.”

You shifted uncomfortably under Kaz's gaze, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and frustration. You knew you had made a mistake by bumping into Beudeker, but it wasn't even your fault. All you wanted was to cut yourself off after the argument with Kaz, and now he was the one who was right again.

Wylan's voice carried through the quiet room, breaking the tension. “What are we do with him now?” he asked, but no one answered, assuming that it was up to their missing Wraith to handle the situation.

Jesper's frustration boiled over, and he jumped up from his seat. “It's not fair!” he exclaimed, pointing his revolver at the wall. “I was the one who wanted to put a bullet between his eyes.”

Matthias stepped forward, before anyone reacted to sharpshooter's words, his expression serious. “We need to figure out who's been leaking our plans to Antoon. This could be dangerous for all of us.”

“I agree,” Nina added. “We need to find out who's been betraying us and deal with them.”

Wylan's voice piped up, “What if we set a trap?”

Kaz nodded, considering the idea.

“We could feed different information to each member of the Dregs and see which version gets back to someone who will claim to be Beudeker now. That way, we'll know who we can trust and who we can't,” you suggested.

Nina grinned. “I like it. And if we catch the traitor, we can make an example out of them.”

Jesper's eyes gleamed with anticipation. “I'll provide the entertainment.”

Matthias shook his head. “No, Jesper. We can't take the law into our own hands. We'll handle the traitor according to our own rules, but we won't kill them.”

Jesper shrugged, disappointed but not arguing. “But killing is our rule, Helvar.”

Matthias's expression darkened, but before he could reply, Kaz spoke up. “That's enough. We're not discussing this any further. We need to focus on finding the leak first, not arguing about how to deal with them.”

Jesper and Matthias both looked at Kaz, but neither of them said anything. The silence in the room was heavy with tension, and you could sense the frustration emanating from Jesper and the anger radiating from Matthias. Kaz's tone had effectively shut down the conversation, but you knew that it was far from over.

“We'll start investigating tomorrow,” Kaz's voice filled the room again. “For now, let's all get some rest. We have a long day ahead of us.”

As Kaz's words faded away, the tension in the room dissipated, and everyone began to go their separate ways. You hesitated, still reeling from the events of the evening, unsure of what to do next.

Sensing your unease, Kaz approached you, his expression serious but not unkind. “I know this is a lot to take in,” he said, his voice low. “But we have a job to do, and we can't afford to let our emotions cloud our judgment. I need you to be focused tomorrow, do you understand?”

You nodded, feeling a bit guilty for today’s argument. “Yes. I'll be ready,” you replied, determined to not let him down.

Kaz gave you a small nod of approval before turning to leave. You watched him go, listening to the rhythmic tapping of his cane on the panels. The weight of his words settling on your shoulders. It was true that you couldn't afford to let your emotions get in the way of the investigation, but it was easier said than done. The events of the evening had shaken you to your core, and you weren't sure if you could push them aside so easily. Life in Ketterdam has been hard, but never before has such danger reached you directly.

With a heavy sigh, you made your way back to your room, hoping that a good night's rest would help clear your mind.

You were surprised to find the Antoon's spy so easily, feeling foolish for not discovering it sooner. Despite the setback, the mood in the Crow Club remained peaceful as the days passed. The seventh of you sat together, planning your next move and gossiping about Ketterdam's richest people. Kaz seemed more relaxed than usual, and even Jesper and Matthias were on their best behavior, seemingly content to simply enjoy the moment of peace.

As the night wore on and the group's conversation continued to flow, you couldn't help but notice Kaz's eyes on you. You caught his gaze a few times, and each time you felt a jolt of electricity run through you. It was a feeling you had been trying to ignore for a while now, but it was becoming increasingly difficult with each passing day.

As you turned to look at Jesper, who was recounting a funny story, you noticed Kaz's expression change slightly. It was a subtle shift, but you could tell he was suddenly distant, lost in thought.

After a few minutes, Kaz stood up and motioned for you to follow him. You looked around at the others, confused, but they simply shrugged and continued their conversation. You followed Kaz up the dimly lit hallway to his office.

Once inside, Kaz closed the door and motioned for you to take a seat. You sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, feeling a bit nervous. Kaz took a seat opposite you, resting his cane on the desk, right next to the chair and leaned forward, his elbows on his desk.

His expression was serious, but not unkind. “I wanted to talk to you about something,” he began, his voice low. “I've noticed that things between us have been a bit... different lately.”

You shifted in your seat, suddenly feeling self-conscious. “Different how?” you asked, not sure if you really wanted to know the answer.

Kaz leaned back in his chair and folded his arms across his chest. “I think you know what I mean,” he replied, his gaze fixed on yours.

Your heart skipped a beat as you realized what he was talking about. “Kaz, I...” you began, but he cut you off with a wave of his hand.

“I just wanted you to know that I'm aware of the situation,” he said, his tone even, then he paused for a moment. “You know, Y/N. I've been thinking a lot lately about what it means to care for someone. To really care for someone,” he looked directly at you, his eyes intense, emphasizing the weight of his words. “And I've come to the conclusion that there's no one I care for more than you.”

You were completely taken aback by Kaz's words. You had never heard him express his feelings so openly before. Your heart raced as you searched his face for any sign of insincerity, but you found none. You were overcome with a mixture of shock, disbelief, and joy.

His heart sank as he watched you gaze at Jesper with a look of admiration and affection earlier, even if you two were just friends. It was then that he realized how deeply in love with you he truly was. He had been trying to ignore his feelings for you for so long, but seeing you look at someone else with such tenderness was too much to bear.

Kaz carefully chose his words, wanting to express his feelings without being too direct. “I've been thinking about our friendship,” he said, his voice low and serious. “I value our bond more than anything else in the world, and I want to make sure that nothing ever comes between us.”

“Why are you bringing this up now?” you asked genuinely confused by Kaz's sudden openness.

He shifted in his seat, looking almost uncomfortable, “Well, I just wanted to make sure that you know how much you mean to me,” Kaz said, his eyes meeting yours. “There's no one else I trust or care for more than you, Y/N.”

You could feel the weight of his words, the sincerity and depth of emotion behind them. You knew that he was a man of few words, and when he spoke, it was always with a purpose. It was hard to reconcile this Kaz with the cold and distant one you had grown accustomed to over the years.

You couldn't help but feel that there was an underlying message in Kaz's words, something that he wasn't explicitly stating. Your intuition was telling you that there was more to the story than what he had let on. You couldn't ignore the nagging feeling that something was amiss.

“Kaz,” you began, your voice hesitant. “Is there something else you want to tell me? Something that you're not saying?”

Kaz's expression remained neutral, but you could sense a hint of discomfort in his demeanor. You knew that he wasn't one to wear his heart on his sleeve, so you weren't surprised that he was hesitant to open up to you completely.

“I've said what I needed to say,” Kaz replied, his voice flat. “There's nothing more to it.”

His reply felt like a dead end, and you couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment. You knew that he was a complex person, with layers that even you couldn't fully comprehend, but you couldn't shake off the sense that he was still holding something back. Nonetheless, you tried to put on a brave face and show your gratitude for his honesty.

“Okay,” you said, rising from your seat. “I appreciate you telling me how you feel. Our friendship means the world to me too, Kaz.” You couldn't help but wonder what his true intentions were, but you knew that you needed to be patient and let him come to you when he was ready.

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[jpmarvel90]

All for the mission

Masterlist Nat Masterlist

Relationship: Sister Nat, Sister Yelena x Sister Reader. Wanda x Reader

Summary: Growing up in the Red Room with Natasha and Yelena, Y/n was hurt when she woke up one morning to find them gone. Her life is forever changed by this moment and their reunion doesn't look like it'll bring any chance to fixing things.

Word Count: 12364

Y/n's POV:

I grew up in the red room. It was hell, but the one shining light was my sisters. Natasha and Yelena. I was the youngest, but we looked out for each other, doing what we could to make the others lives easier. We used to whisper to each other at night about our plans to leave. We had hopes for a better life. And that happened, for Yelena and Nat at least.

Early one morning I was dragged in front of Dreykov and was told about how my sisters had escaped together, left in the middle of the night. I was just 15 at the time but that didn't stop the brutality that was to follow. Although we had talked many times about escaping, I knew nothing about their attempt that night. Not that Dreykov or his dogs believed me. As they had lost their two greatest assets, I was to pay the price.

For a whole month, I was locked away in a cell where bright lights were never turned off and loud music played. The only release I would get was the brief walk to the "Interrogation room." But then a new hell would be inflicted on me as I was beaten and tortured. Initially for any information they could get. When they realised, I did in fact know nothing, they did it to punish me. I had a cup or water and two slices of mouldy bread a day. Barely enough to keep me alive. My body is now covered in scars from that brutal month. A reminder that I was expendable to my sisters. Not even worth a second thought as they escaped to start their new lives.

After that month, I was put back into the training programme. I worked my ass off. Not because I wanted to do well for the red room, but because I wanted to be as strong as possible and trusted to go out on missions. I had to escape, and I knew that was my only option.

It took four years before I got my opportunity. A part of me wanted to run as soon as I got my first solo mission, but I had to plan it all perfectly. It couldn't be a mission in the middle of nowhere, I had to have a means to not just escape but find a place to hide. Over those four years, I learnt every way in which they monitored the widows that went on missions. I then worked a way to make sure I could stop all of it to give me the best chance of getting away.

I was meticulous in my planning and finally the perfect opportunity came up. The mission was in the middle of Rome. I would have plenty of opportunity to escape. I just needed to make sure I got rid of all means of tracking me. I was so nervous as they dropped me in. I had to spend a week in Rome first to stakeout my target. This worked perfectly for me as it meant that I had money. I could buy clothes that I knew were clean of any tracking devices. I stuck to the shops near the target to not arouse suspicion. To the red room, I was just keeping up appearances. Blending in.

I ate as little as possible that week, knowing I would need the money to ensure my escape. Once I made my move, I had to be quick, and I wouldn't have time to be begging for help. It was the day I had to take out the target. I had found the most advantageous spot to carry out the assassination. It wasn't practical to their mission, but it was to mine. It provided me with an easy escape to the metro.

So as the time came, I set up my position before starting my daring escape. I was on the metro before they even noticed that I had left my position. Seems it was to my advantage that they had an idiot on comms that day! I got off when I knew they had noticed and found a bathroom to change. I then had the hardest part, cutting out the tracked from the back of my neck. It hurt and bled like a bitch, but I didn't have time to worry about that. I patched it up and jumped back on the metro to my next stop.

I had found a hair salon near Roma Termini. If I had this right, I would have time to cut and dye my hair before getting on the first train out of Rome. Every time I moved, I was careful to keep my face hidden, either wearing a cap or keeping the hood of my jacket up. It all seemed too easy and before I knew it, I was in France. I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it didn't. It just was that easy. My four years of planning had paid off and I was finally free.

I spent the next year moving around mainland Europe, keeping a low profile. But by my 22nd birthday, I was settled in London. I had a job in a bar and a small crappy apartment. To most people, it wouldn't have been great. But to me it was everything. I was free.

I had no desire to follow in my sister's footsteps in become a superhero. I wanted a normal life. Yes, the horrible things I had done still haunt me, but I couldn't risk being caught. If I was, I knew that it would not end well, and I would either be tortured and killed or tortured and back to being a widow. My ledger would only grow.

Unfortunately, fate had other plans. I was happily walking home one evening and it felt like someone was watching me. I took the long way home, turning at the last minute or dipping down alleyways. The presence felt closer than ever, and I knew it was time to fight. Before the hand could even reach my shoulder, I had grabbed it and flipped the shadow over my shoulder, avoiding their attempts to fight me off. I had them pinned under me and I saw a familiar smirk. "You've grown mladshaya sestra. (Little sister)"

Anger rages within me and the next thing I know, my fist is connecting with her nose. "Fuck! Ok, I deserve that." Nat says, grabbing at her nose as I stepped off her. I don't want to see her or have anything to do with her. She left me and I'm going to do the same now. I turn and walk away. "Y/n, wait!" Nat calls after me but I ignore her, taking a short cut through the park to my apartment. "Please!" She shouts. "Deep breaths Y/n. Just keep walking and she'll go." I tell myself. "I'm sorry!" She shouts in a desperate attempt to get me to stop.

It works and I stop in my tracks. I turn around to face her, a fire inside of me. "You're sorry?!" I shout at her as she reaches me. She flinches at my voice. "You left me in that hell hole. That was bad enough, but did you even consider that there might be consequences for those that you left behind?!" I yell at her. She doesn't answer me. "Of course, you didn't. We talked about escaping for years and when it finally came to it, you left me." I say in a much quieter tone, the hurt winning out.

"You were just a kid Y/n. You were safer there than if you came with us." She tries to convince me, but I just scoff. "You have no idea what happened to me when they found you gone. But I'll tell you one thing, I certainly wasn't safer." I turn to walk away again, wanting this conversation to end. "We were planning to come back for you!" She calls after me. It makes me stop again as I let out a loud laugh. "Really?! I was there for over 4 years. No sign of you." I chuckle sadly. "But I guess you had other priorities right. Like being an Avenger, keeping up your reputation." I seethe.

"I was coming back for you now. It's how I found out that you had escaped. We want to help you." Nat tries to reach out to take my hand, but I snatch it away. "I got out of that hell hole all on my own and I certainly don't need any help now. Especially from you!" I fumed. "Please pauchok. (Baby spider.)" She pleads with me. "Don't call me that. I don't need you and I don't ever want to see you again!" The pain in her eyes doesn't go unnoticed. But I really don't care. She hasn't been my sister in years.

Turns out, I would have to see her again. Every evening in fact. She found out where I worked, and she would come into the bar every day. The only interaction we would have, was me serving her drink. She would try to start conversations, but I ignored her. I wasn't going to let her in.

One night, to my surprise, she brought Yelena with her. Her body collided with mine as she pulled me into a hug. "I missed you pauchok." I peeled her off me and pushed her away. She frowns at my actions as I don't say a word to her. "Y/n?" She questions, as I return behind the bar. "What can I get you?" I ask her without making eye contact. I notice Yelena look to Nat with sad eyes. "Vodka." She replies taking her seat next to her sister. I place the glass in front of her and pour. Then turning my attention to other customers.

This goes on for weeks. Neither of them getting the picture that I don't want to talk to or see them. After a month, a new face is with them. I don't recognise her, but she is beautiful. It takes me a moment to compose myself before I take their order. "Y/n, this is Wanda. Wanda, this is Y/n our little sister." Nat introduces us. "We're not sisters. We just grew up together." I correct Nat, a wave of hurt flashes across her face. "But it's nice to meet you Wanda what can I get you?" I ask. "Uh, just a pinot please." She speaks quietly, but her accent is familiar. "Sokovian?" I question as I place the glass down in front of her, to which she nods. "Ah. Sorry about what happened there." I say and she shrugs. Getting the sense, she doesn't want to talk anymore, I go back to my job, and more importantly ignoring my sisters.

Wanda started to come in more with Nat and Yelena. I knew what they were trying to do. It was my weakest area. I'm a sucker for love and Wanda was exactly my type. I was always pleasant and nice to Wanda, whilst my "sisters" still got the cold shoulder treatment. She became more comfortable around me, and we hit it off.

She started to come in on her own and then one day asked if I would go on a walk with her. I happily agreed and we went around Hyde Park, getting to know each other. She was so easy to talk to and I felt safe around her. "I know that you're only here because of my sisters." I tell her as we take a seat on the bench. She looks up at me and her mouth opens and shuts a couple of times before she finds her words.

"I'm not actually. They were always talking about this amazing sister they had and showed me pictures. When Nat found you, she showed me a photo she had and there was something about you that I was drawn to. I had to get to know you. So, I asked Nat if I could come with her to meet you one time. She reluctantly agreed and here we are. This is all me Y/n." She reassures me, taking my hand in hers.

And that's how things went for the next month. We spent every day together and I was quickly falling for her. "You know, you really should talk to your sisters. They just want to make sure you're safe and help to get you back on your feet." Wanda says as we snuggle in my apartment. "But I am on my feet. I was never happier until they came back in my life. I've never felt freer." I defend. She adjusts herself so she can look at me better. "They really are sorry. Is there really no way you can forgive them?" She asks with her puppy dog eyes.

I sigh and roll out from underneath her, sitting on the edge of the bed, my head in my hands. "It's not that simple Wanda. They just left. One day they were there and the next they were gone. And as their sister. I was the one who had to pay for it. I went through hell, and it was directly caused by their actions." I say, my voice muffled by my hands.

I feel my hands slowly being pulled away as my eyes land on the red head on her knees in front of me. "Tell me what they did to you." She whispers. "You don't want to hear it." I tell her, not wanting to burden her with any of it. "Please?" She asks, cupping my face. Her eyes bore into me, and I knew I was done for. So, I told her. I shared with her what I faced in the month after they left. The different ways they caused me pain and the way they used me as their own toy. Her eyes were red the whole time I spoke. Her anger no longer able to be supressed.

"Show me." She whispers when I finish baring my soul. "What?" I question. "Show me your scars. I want to see all of you." Her words are soft and full of love. I slowly undid the buttons of my shirt and let her push it off my shoulders. She gasps when she sees my torso littered with scars. Her hands slowly running over each one. I can't look at her. Ashamed of the monster they made me. "I'll kill them." She says quietly but there is a venom to her voice.

When she's finished taking in my form, she puts her finger under my chin and lifts my head so I'm looking at her. Her eyes are glossy and full of pain. "These are proof of the strong woman that you are. They show the fight you had to come through to get to where you are today. Never, be ashamed of them." She tells me firmly. I nod slowly, fighting my own tears. She leans in and captures my lips in a soft kiss. We've kissed before, but this one felt different. Like she was showing me that I was accepted and loved. It was the kiss that made me realise I would do anything to stay with her.

That was a decision that came sooner than I thought. The next week she came into the bar, her face showing that she had been crying. She told me how she had to go back to New York. She begged me to go with her, that I could live with her in the compound. I wasn't sure at first. I still wasn't on talking terms with my sisters, but my heart was breaking knowing that if I didn't go with her, I didn't know when I'd see Wanda again.

So, I agreed. I packed up what little I had in my apartment and followed her to New York. I was given my own room in the compound and shown all the facilities that I could use. Turns out they were expecting me. Apparently, Natasha and Yelena had talked to both Tony and Fury about me moving in way back when they found out that I had escaped. They wanted to keep me safe there. I must admit, I could feel the anger towards them starting to thaw, but I knew it would be a long time before I could truly forgive them.

Not wanting to just live off the Avengers, I got myself a job in a local bar and I really was having such a great time. Wanda and I were stronger than ever. Slowly, I was engaging more with my sisters. I had even started to train again. It was nice to have an outlet for my anger. Though it did become a bit of a showcase as I was one of the few that could take down Nat. Which was a surprise to a lot of them.

I formed a quick bond with Tony. I loved being in his lab and I helped him as much as I could. Most days I was with him, he was trying to convince me to join them. But it wasn't for me. Not now at least. But I promised him I would never completely rule out the offer.

Which for him worked out, because he was persistent. I guess you could say I became a part time Avenger. I still wanted to do my job in the bar. It gave me a normality I had craved all those years in the red room. But I also I found a newfound enjoyment in helping out on missions. It was a good balance.

I had been living at the compound for about 8 months now. I was meant to be at work today, but one of the pipes burst so they had to close up and they sent us all home. I was excited to get home as it meant more time with Wanda. She had only just gotten back from a mission at the weekend, so it was a blessing to get some unexpected time together.

When I got to the compound, I heard shouting coming from the common room. I made my way in that direction when I heard my name. Being the nosy person I am, I stayed back, not making my presence known. "I can't do it anymore. It's not fair. It's been 9 months of lying and doing something that I never wanted to do in the first place." Wanda complained. What is she on about? "Maximoff, you knew what you were getting into when you agreed to be part of the mission. You knew that you would have to keep up the rouse with Y/n until we knew for sure that she wasn't under the red room influence."

What the fuck?! Was I just a mission to her? "Wanda he's right. We're so close to the end. You just need to hang in there." The voice of my sister feels like a burning knife to my chest. Was this all just a mission. Did they even want to come and find me? I knew I should have stuck to my instinct and not trust them.

"Maximoff, you will continue on with this mission for one more month. That's all I ask. Romanoff, Belova. Keep up what you're doing. We're not far from defeating the red room now." Fury's order ring around the room as my heart completely shatters. I decide now is the best time to make my presence known. I step out into view, and I see all of their faces drop. "I'm glad to know that I'm just a mission." I say as they all stand speechless. "But at least now I know, you don't to keep up the façade anymore Wanda." I say turning my back to leave.

"Y/n! Wait!" Wanda calls after me, grabbing my arm. "Let go of me." I growl, but she doesn't listen. "It's not what it looks like. Please, don't go." She begs but I shake my head. "In the park, when you said this wasn't my sisters doing. I guess you didn't lie. I just got the wrong person. It was Fury. God, I'm so stupid. I can't believe I actually fell for it and even fell in love with you!" I ranted. "No, no. Please." Wanda pleads again. "Answer me one question and I'll consider staying." I say to her, and she nods frantically. "When you came into the bar that first night. Were you there because you truly did want to meet me, or was it part of the mission?" Her head instantly drops, and her gaze is fixated on the floor. "I guess that gives me my answer." I slowly peel her hand from around my arm and walk away. Only this time to be stopped by my sister.

"Y/n." Nat says, moving in front of me, blocking my exit. Yelena by her side. "No. You know, I thought that leaving me in that hell was bad enough. But this. This hurts more than any pain I've been through." I trembled, trying to fight the tears threatening to fall. "You spent all that time trying to get me to forgive you, but it was all lies!" I cry out. "Tell me. Was it all a mission for you too? Were you actually trying to find me?" I can read the answer across their faces, but I want to hear it from them. "ANSWER ME!" I yell, causing both of them to flinch. "We weren't looking for you. Fury had learnt about you and when he found out you were our sister, he gave us the information to find you and to see if you were working for the red room. But we were so happy...." I hold my hand up stopping her straight away.

"You don't trust me. You have spent all this time trying to get me to forgive and trust you, but it was all a lie, because you don't even trust me. After you left, I was tortured and raped all because you were my sisters and had managed to escape their clutches. For four years, I had to fight to stay alive and keep my sanity so I could get out myself. Which I did! I had a normal fucking life. Something I had never thought I would get. But no! I'm the one that can't be trusted! Fuck you!" I scream at them.

I push past them and run to my room before anyone can come after me. "FRIDAY, don't anyone in." I instruct the AI. "Of course, Miss Y/l/n." I start throwing as much as I can in a rucksack. Luckily, I had saved as much money as I could, so I didn't need to worry about that. After a few minutes there is banging at my door. "Y/n, please! Let us just talk." Yelena begs from behind the locked door. I ignore everything they say until Wanda's voice pipes up. "Y/n, baby. Please open the door. It wasn't just a mission. I-I love you!" She cries. "STOP LYING TO ME!" I shout, I can't take listening to it anymore. "FRIDAY open the door please." Nat as, but the AI declines. "Miss Y/l/n has requested the door remains locked. Only Mr Stark can override it." I can hear her sigh. "Yelena, go and get Tony." Nat instructs our sister.

I know that I don't have long to get out of here before Tony gets here. I also don't know who else in the compound was in on this mission. But I'm not sticking around to find out. I leave the promise ring that Wanda had given me on the bedside table. Yanking it off my finger as it felt like it was burning my skin. Knowing the door is a no go, I make my way to the window and take a look down. Luckily, I'm only two stories up. It'll hurt a bit, but if I land it properly, I should be able to get away uninjured.

I push my bag out first and then I'm quick to follow it, just as I hear Tony's voice in the corridor. I sprint as fast as I can to the edge of the compound, not wanting to be seen. I can't believe this is my life again. On the run, but this time, I've got to watch my back from both sides, as it seems I can't even trust my own family.

Nat's POV:

Well, we have royally screwed up. When we finally get Tony to override FRIDAY to let us into Y/n's room, she's already gone. Her window open and my little sister fled. I go to the window in the hopes to see her, but there's nothing but darkness. I'm so stupid to have agreed to this. I'm so scared of the red room beating us that I couldn't even trust my own sister.

We made the worst decision when we decided to leave Y/n behind. We thought she was too young and would be a burden to us as we tried to escape. We did always plan on going back to her, but we go so caught up in proving our loyalty to SHIELD, that it kind of fell to the wayside. Once our loyalty was proven, we spent so much time on missions, we didn't have the chance to think about getting our sister back. It is and will forever be my greatest regret. Well, this moment may come a close second.

When Fury came to Yelena and me to say that he had information on our sister, I couldn't believe it. We hadn't long heard rumours about Y/n being killed in the red room. We mourned her, even though we knew that the rumours were unlikely true. But seeing the picture of her behind a bar, it was clearly her. I may not have seen her since she was 15, but she's not changed, she just looked older and more jaded.

We had no info on when she actually managed to escape. It was part of the reason why Fury was suspicious of her. Instead of trusting my gut and Y/n, we played along with him. Wanting to make sure there was no way that Y/n was under the influence of the red room.

It hurt Yelena and I when she ignored us. She was hurt and I can't blame her. But her words were as sharp as knives and each one hurt. It was so obvious we had let her down and although this was a mission. I was determined to make sure that she was safe, and I could do that best from New York. It was Fury's idea to bring in Wanda.

I had questioned it at first, I knew that Y/n falls hard. It was one thing to do what we were doing, but this felt like it was crossing a line. Wanda was happy to do it and Fury's mind was set. So, I watched as my sister fell in love with one of my closest friends. Knowing if she ever found out, it would break her heart. What took me by complete surprise, was the fact that it was obvious that Wanda felt the same. She too was falling for Y/n. That is how we came to be in an argument with Fury.

Wanda wanted to stop and tell Y/n the truth. She knew that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with Y/n and she couldn't do that on a foundation of lies. But we still couldn't confirm Y/n wasn't working for the red room. Had I not let my desire to clear my ledger and the fear of what the red room could do, I would have seen how Y/n was just living her best life. She was free, something she had always dreamt of. Of course, she would have had no loyalty to the red room. Instead, I make her believe that I have no trust in her and that I never wanted her back in the first place. Which is a complete lie.

Once she moved into the compound, Yelena and I worked so hard to show her how sorry we were and how much we wanted her in our lives. Slowly but surely, she was coming around to us and we started to have a positive relationship. It was the happiest I had been since the red room. Being back with both of my sisters safe. I naively thought that if we could just take down the red room, Y/n would never need to know about the betrayal. Everything would have worked out. But that damn pipe at her work screwed everything up for us. Ok, that's a lie. We screwed everything up.

Seeing the hurt on Y/n's face caused me physical pain. I hated that once again I had let her down. But what hurt the most. What felt like I had just had my heart ripped out, was hearing that she was tortured and raped as a punishment for us escaping. We genuinely thought she would be safe. She was better than both of us and we knew she was an asset to them. We never thought they would go that far with her. But we completely got that wrong and I'll never forgive myself. She's my little sister, my pauchok and it's my fault that she is hurting.

Y/n had been gone for a week and we had no luck in tracing her. Tony and the others were not happy when they found out what we had been doing. They were non the wiser and had been fed the same line as Y/n. She was moving here to be safe from the red room. The only thing now is I think we've made the target on her back even bigger. She was helping us on mission, and it will have just put her back on their radar. Maybe we should have left her in London, she was safe there. I should never have listened to Fury.

Wanda was a mess. She shut herself away. When she saw the promise ring on Y/n's table, it broke her. Yelena and I would spend time with her but she'd just cry and plead for us to find Y/n so she could apologise. I don't think she thought she would fall for Y/n when this started and I'm sure she only agreed to do it because she feels like she still has to prove herself after everything that happened with Ultron. But here we are, the three of us completely broken and it's all our fault.

I spend my nights awake, wondering if we'll ever find her, and if we do, if she could ever forgive us. I wouldn't blame her. We don't deserve it. But I pray to a God that I don't believe in, that she would give us a slither of a chance and we'll do the rest.

I'm still spending every minute away from missions, looking for Y/n. I think I've found her in Reykjavik. But I don't want to go and risk losing her. I need to be 100% sure before I go in. So, I monitor the situation as best I can whilst following up on other leads. But that all stops with the receipt of a video. A video that makes my world completely stop.

I call the whole team into the briefing room, too scared to the play the video on my own. If this is what I think it is, I'm going to need the teams help. When I press play, I instantly hear a choked-up sob come from Wanda as a beaten and bloodied Y/n appears on the screen. Her hands are tied up and attached to a butcher's hook above her head. She's just in a sports bra and shorts, exposing all of the wounds that they have inflicted on her, both old and new.

I look to Yelena, and she has a look of horror on her face, which probably matches my own. That's our little sister and once again, she's being tortured at the hands of Dreykov because of us! "Hello Natalia and Yelena. We found your little sister here. We've been monitoring her since she started fighting on the wrong side. It was a surprise to us when we found her, she must have gotten too comfortable in her western ways!" The face of the man I loathed filled the screen and I wish I could reach through and strangle him, inflict all the pain that he was causing to Y/n.

"Wake her up!" He snaps, to one of his little guards. He grabs a taser and it jolts Y/n awake. "Welcome back Y/l/n." He sneers. Y/n's one eye, that isn't swollen shut, looks up at the camera. "Oh goody! A camera, who knew you were kinky!" She jokes. God, she's going to get herself killed! With her words, a swift punch is landed on Y/n's face. But she just spits out the blood and laughs. It seems to irritate Dreykov and he starts his interrogation. "Tell us, what is Fury's grand plan?" He snarls in Y/n's face. "Urgh, someone needs a breath mint!" Y/n scrunches up her face in disgust. That comment earns another swift punch to her gut, making us all finch at the cracking sound of a rib.

Dreykov carries on in asking her lots of question which he gets a sarcastic comment in return to. Which inevitably follows by some form of pain infliction. Each time, I flinch as Y/n tries so hard to not show the pain. Considering that we betrayed her, she's not giving anything away. She could easily answer all the questions she is being asked, but she doesn't. Once again just proving how wrong we got this. How wrong I go it!

I feel a hand clamp on to mine. I look to the source only to see Yelena, teary eyes fixed on the screen as our little sister gets a knife gash across her shoulder. I squeeze her hand back, trying to give her some form of reassurance, but I don't have much belief myself.

Wanda is sobbing as she watches her love being tortured in front of her, completely helpless to do anything. "Tony, can we do anything to trace this?" I ask, pleading in my head we can. "FRIDAY's working on it. Seems like they're not so smart and left a gateway through the telnet port. Hopefully through that we'll be able to triangulate a rough location." He explains. That seems to give me a sense of hope. Maybe we can find her.

After what seems like hours, Dreykov stops his attack and turns to the camera. "Natalia, you can see what we can do. If you want to save your sister, you know what you have to do." He threatens. Y/n's laugh breaks through the tension. This causes Dreykov's head to snap around to face her. "And what are you laughing at pauchok?" The use of the pet name has me fuming, the anger I thought was already at it's limit still growing.

"They're not there. They don't care." She sadly chuckles. The confusion on Dreykov's face doesn't go unnoticed. "You took a dead end. Wasted your time." She adds on, lifting her head to make direct eye contact with him. "You still don't get it do you. I wasn't lying all those years ago when you hung me to this same hook. I knew nothing about their escape. They didn't want a kid like me following them around." She explains and I can see as the realisation hits Dreykov. "But you fought with them. Lived with them." He questions back.

Once again, she laughs, but I can see the pain in her eyes as she speaks. "They may help the ordinary person, but they're no better than you, using people for their own gains. They just give you a comfy room whilst they do it." My head drops at her words. She's right, how can we preach about being the good guys when we've treated her like this. "My own sisters didn't trust me. Believed I was still working for you. I just wanted a NORMAL FUCKING LIFE!" She shouts, tears now falling down her bloodied cheeks.

"I was safe and happy. But they manipulated that. Used my weaknesses against me. I always used to think you'd never beat me because I still loved with everything I had. But now I see it, you're right. Love really is just for children. It gets you nothing but heartache and makes you weak and vulnerable." I look over to Wanda at this point and, if it's possible, I think I just saw her heart break even more.

That was something Yelena and I always admired about Y/n. Through all of the hell we went through, she still loved and cared for people. She never let them break that. The irony that her very family were the ones to actually make her give up.

"Tony, please say you have something. We don't have much time." I beg, knowing that Y/n's life is very much on the line right now. "I'm dispensable. No one really knows who I am. There is no one who will mourn me. But you've shown your hand. I'll die today but you won't win." I can't bare to hear her talk like she is. I'd mourn her. All those years we were apart, I felt like a part of me was missing. Then when we got her back, even when she was giving us the cold shoulder, I felt like I was whole again.

My eyes don't leave the screen as I see Dreykov step towards Y/n. "You always disappointed me. Always in the shadows of your sisters, never quite able to match their ability. And here you are, still disappointing me. You know what I do with lose ends?" He growls. "Cut them." And with those words he plunges a knife into Y/n's torso and twists it. "NO!" Yelena and I both shoot up from our seats. "You'll never win." Y/n whispers with a smirk, bloody starting to drip from her mouth.

"I've got a location! They're in Mexico. Suit up and in the Quinjet now!" Tony shouts, but I'm still staring at the screen. "She's no use to us now. She's not got long. Do as you please with her then leave." Dreykov coldly speaks as he wipes the blood from his hand. Forgetting the video, it carries on playing as his goons take turns in hitting Y/n like a punch bag. "Natasha, come on. We have to go now if we've got any chance of saving our mladshaya sestra." Yelena's voice pulls me back to the room, and I instantly run out to change and get ready to kill the son of a bitch.

The flight on the quinjet thankfully didn't take too long. Which was good as every minute counts. Who knows what they're doing to her right now. I just pray that she's still alive, clinging one. But I could see it, she had given up, accepted her fate of dying. "We need a plan for when we get there." Steve says looking to me. "Yelena, Wanda and I will go to Y/n. The rest of you, clear the building and get Dreykov. Then leave him for us." I order. Nice and simple.

Everyone agrees and as soon as the jet touches the floor, we are running out and heading in. There weren't many guards, clearly this was just a holding place. That works to our benefit. I pushed down every feeling I had to focus on getting to Y/n. I couldn't let my fear of losing her overpower me right now or I'd be no help to anyone. "Over here Natasha!" I hear Yelena shout. With one swift kick, I take out the last guard and rush over to her, Wanda not far behind. "It's locked, but I can hear those assholes in there!" She says as I grab the handle and try it for myself. "I'll deal with it." Wanda states, pushing us back out of the way.

Red whisps come from her hands and within seconds the door is off it's hinges. I gasp as I see Y/n's bloodied form. She's almost unrecognisable. The pool of blood under her body shows that she doesn't have much time. The guards in the room have a smug look on their faces as they turn to see us. "The boss will be so happy when we turn up will all three of them!" One of them sneers. With one swift movement the same red whisps wrap around his body and that smirk is soon replaced with fear.

"I saw you in the video. You enjoyed this the most." Wanda growls, her eyes completely red now as she stalks towards him. "I'll be sure to enjoy this, and with those words she snaps his neck, his body falling to the floor. Yelena and I fight off the three remaining men. As soon as the last body hits the floor I rush over to Y/n.

"Oh my God. What have they done to you?" I whisper. "Yelena, help me get her down." I order. We carefully lift her, but the movement jolts her awake and has her crying out in pain. "Y/n, it's Nat. We're here to take you home." I speak softly, slowly moving some of her hair out of her face. Yelena has taken off her jacket and is using it to try and stop the bleeding from the stab wound that Dreykov inflicted. "I don't have a home." Y/n struggles to say as her eyes flutter close. "No! Keep those eyes open pauchok. Yell at me, tell me you hate me, just don't go to sleep." I beg. Hearing how much she hates me would be better than this silence as she falls into unconsciousness.

"Let's get her to Bruce." I say, slipping my arms under her and lifting her into me. "We have Y/n. Bruce we're on our way to you." I shout into the comms before rushing out as quickly as we can. Yelena doesn't let up on the pressure to Y/n's stomach and Wanda's eyes only leave Y/n to open a door or take out the last few guards. "We have Dreykov." Tony announces through the comms. But right now, it's the last thing on my mind. I just want Y/n to be ok.

Bruce is waiting for us in the medical area on the jet. I gently place Y/n's body down onto the table and step back allowing Bruce and his team to get to work. My arms reach out to grasp around Yelena. I need her close to me and I know she does too. I notice Wanda looking lost, so I hold my hand out to her, which she easily takes. The three of us watch as Bruce fights to save Y/n. Minutes slowly ticking by.

"She's crashing! I need more blood, adrenaline and atropine." Bruce shouts his orders and the team react instantly. It feels like my own heart has stopped as we watch Bruce start compressions. With each jolt of electricity that is used to try to restart her heart, we collectively flinch. Tears are streaming down my eyes as I watch our sister slowly fade away and it's all our fault.

Bruce looks over to us and I see the pain in his own eyes. The short time Y/n had been with us, she had made close friends. Everyone loved her. I'm waiting for him to tell us that he's done all he can. That Y/n, my sister who I was meant to protect, is dead. He goes to open his mouth but it's like he second guesses what he wants to say. He simply turns on the spot and returns to working on Y/n.

He refuses to give up and I couldn't be more grateful when the heart monitor starts to beep. We all let out a collective sigh of relief. But it doesn't last long. "Aw, your pauchok is still alive. I guess I'll have to try harder to squish her next time!" I storm over to Dreykov who has his arms handcuffed behind his back. My fist connects with his smug face, knocking his body to the floor. Yelena is quickly by my side delivering a swift kick to his stomach.

"I'll get out. A prison won't hold me. I have friends in high places." He taunts from the floor. "That won't be a problem if we kill you." I snarl back to him. "You're not a killer anymore Natalia. You've done soft. The Avengers have tainted you." He's so sure of his words. Looking up I see the Avengers, my friends, my family, looking at me. Steve gives me a nod and turns his back, walking towards the jet. It's his silent way of telling me to do what I have to do. The others soon fall in line and it's just Yelena, Wanda and I left.

"You know. I hated my life in the red room. I've spent my whole time trying to make up for the horrible things I did whilst I was under your control. I lost sight of the fact that I gained two of the most important things to me whilst in that hell. My sisters." I tell him, connecting my boot to his face. "She'll never forgive you." He smirks through bloodied teeth. "You're right. I don't think she will. But I won't make the same mistake twice in not protecting her." I tell him, crouching down in front of him. "You two can go. You don't need to be a part of this." I say to Yelena and Wanda. But neither of them move.

"I want to watch this man die after everything he's done." Yelena hisses. "And I want to see him pay for the hurt he's caused to Y/n." Wanda adds on. "You're no different than us if you kill me." He speaks from the floor. I can see he's panicking now. "The only difference is, as much as I want to drag this out and cause you as much pain as possible. I won't. I'll make this quick." I stand up and take my gun from my holster, pointing it to his head. "Wait! No please..." I don't give him a chance before I pull the trigger. The bullet lodging in his skull.

Without giving him another look, I walk away, Yelena and Wanda following behind. When we get to the jet, we all go straight to Y/n. "She's stable for now, but she'll need surgery as soon as we're back at the compound. I've called Cho and she'll be waiting for us." Bruce informs us. "Thank you for saving her Bruce." Yelena says, taking Y/n's hand in her own. "She's not out of the woods yet. But she's strong." He replies, placing his hand on Yelena's shoulder.

The journey back to the compound is much calmer than when we left. The three of us never leave Y/n's side as we make the journey home. Just as Bruce said, Cho and her team are waiting for us and take Y/n straight to the medical wing. "You three should go and clean up. Y/n will be in surgery for a while. I promise I'll update you if anything changes before you get back." Tony tells us. None of us have the energy to fight and I can't bare to have Y/n's blood on my hands for much longer.

After Y/n's surgery, she falls into a coma. Her body had extensive injuries and it's a miracle that she is even alive. But we have no idea if or when she might wake up. Even if she does, she'll have a lot of recovery to go through. Between Yelena, Wanda and I, one of us is always with her. A lot of the time all three of us just sit with her, telling her how sorry we are, begging her to wake up. But nothing changes.

3 weeks. That's how long she's been led in this bed unconscious. Each day I'm losing hope that she'll ever wake up. But I won't give up on her. I have to be there for her as much as I can. Even if she has no clue that we're here. It's a Tuesday lunch time and the three of us are eating our salad around Y/n's bed. Filling her in on the latest stupid thing Tony did. Wanda suddenly grabs at her head in pain. "Are you ok Wands?" I ask, placing my hand on her back. "It's not me." She groans. I instantly turn my head to see Y/n's eyes flicking. "Y/n. pauchok? Can you hear us?" I say, gently running my hand through her hair.

I turn to tell Yelena to get Bruce but she's already out of the door calling for him. When her eyes eventually open, they dart around the room, trying to identify where she is. "You're ok Y/n. You're at the compound you're safe. Bruce is on his way." I try to reassure her. Having her awake, all I want to do is tell her how sorry I am and beg her for forgiveness. But I can't.

Wanda is by her side, her hand interlocked with Y/n's. But we all step back when Bruce enters the room and let him do his thing. She's not very responsive but Bruce looks somewhat happy. "She'll probably be in and out of consciousness for a while, but she seems to be doing ok. I'll do more test when she's more with it and I'll have a better idea at what we're dealing with." He explains before leaving us to it.

Over the next few hours, she goes in and out of consciousness, but we never leave her side. She becomes move communicative as she does, giving us the bare minimum to show she's awake. "Why are you here?" She asks when she's more with it. "I know you have no reason to believe or trust us, but we wanted to be here for you." She looks around the room at all of us but doesn't offer a response.

"Good to see you're awake. Would you mind giving us the room so I can run some tests?" Bruce asks us, taking Y/n's chart. We slip out of the room and stand by the window observing as Bruce carries out his checks. "Do you think she'll ever forgive us?" Yelena asks, the sadness evident in her voice. I sigh knowing I can't really give her the answer she wants. "I'm not sure she will. It was so hard to get her forgiveness when she came back in our lives. As much as that was real to us, it was based off of lies." I reply, giving no reassurance at all. But it doesn't pay to live off false hope.

Wanda stands there quietly, lost in her thoughts. "Are you ok?" I ask her, reaching out to place a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I love her so much. I know it started as a mission, but I fell for her, hard. I can't bare to think that I've lost her. I know it's all on me, but I have to at least fight for her. You should do the same." She says before walking out and leaving us.

Over the next week, Y/n was starting to heal. Bruce had warned us that she would have to go through extensive physio to even have a chance at a full recovery. The beating gave her a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) and there is damage to her spin, which at the moment has resulted in paralysis from her waist down. Something Bruce is hopefully will be temporary with the help of physio.

Much to Y/n's dismay, we all stuck around. After what happened, Fury agreed to allow us all an extended leave of absence, only to be called upon for world saving missions. It meant that we could dedicate our time to helping Y/n recover. We are determined to show her that we're being completely honest and want to be there for her. I just don't know if she'll accept it.

Y/n's POV:

Well, that whole experience was hell. I thought I was going to die after Dreykov stabbed me. I had come to terms and accepted my fate. In my mind, I genuinely thought that I was alone. After everything that had happened with my sisters and Wanda, there was not one part of me that thought they would come for me. Especially as it risked opening them up to the risk of being capture by the red room again.

I'm not sure how I feel about that. I'm so unbelievably hurt by it all, but they were there for me when I thought I was alone. But that doesn't make up for everything they did does it? It makes it harder to know what I'm feeling when they're around me all day being sickly sweet. When I heard they had all taken a leave of absence, I was shocked. Nat has always been so focused on making up for her wrongs, missions have become her life.

Seeing Wanda is the hardest. I still love her. That isn't going away any time soon, especially when I wake up to her, my hand clenched in hers, her beautiful red hair splayed over my legs. The pining looks she gives me don't help either. I know exactly how I feel, but I don't have a clue what is real and what is fake anymore. My trust radar is completely out of whack so I've gone completely on the defensive and built up my walls as high as I can.

On top of all this emotional stress, my body is broken. I'm stuck in a hospital bed having to rely on other people to help me do basic things. What makes it worse, is it's the people that I don't want to be around that are doing them. They've managed to scare off every nurse that Tony and Bruce have brought in to help and it's getting frustrating. Everything is just getting too much. I know even if I make ground in rehab, I'm not ever going to be back to where I was. I'll be no use to them for missions, so it won't be long until I'm back on my own anyway. I have sisters I can't trust and who don't seem to trust me and I woman I'm madly in love with but so incredibly hurt by. I just don't know what to do.

Sensing my frustration, Tony was able to convince the others to let him take me to my physio appointment. I was trying to get the use of my legs back. I can stand but walking is proving difficult. It was a relief to not have apologetic and pitying eyes on me the whole session. "Come on Y/n, you've got this. Just one step that's all." The physio, Mark, encourages. I frown as I have failed at every attempt to do this today.

I have a sheen of sweat on my forehead as I hold my body weight up on the two support poles beside me. If Dreykov could see me now, he'd laugh at what he had turned me into. I shake my head, trying to fight off the intrusive thoughts. I manage to get my leg to move forward in an awkward step, but I smile as it's the furthest I've got so far. "Amazing work Y/n!" Tony encourages me from the side. I place my foot down but I get the weight wrong and I'm tumbling to the floor, Tony's arms just catching my head before it could bounce off the padded base.

"You did great today Y/n. Let's get you up and try again." Mark says in an annoyingly enthusiastic voice. "I think she needs a rest." Tony suggests, already seeing my anger. "But she's so close, just one more try...." "No." I growl lowly. "No?" He questions me. "I can't do this anymore! I'm just useless! Leave me alone! Just get out!" I yell, tears forming in my eyes. Mark doesn't need telling twice as she scurries out of the room. But Tony doesn't listen to me. He just sits there holding me as I'm still in a heap on the floor.

My chest is heaving as I breathe heavily from the anger and effort I had put into today. "Talk to me." Tony says softly. "I look between his eyes, my own full of tears. I don't see pity. I just see care. "I'm scared." I admit quietly, afraid of my own voice. Tony doesn't respond, he just lets me reach the words I need in my own time. "I know I'll never be back to how I was. Which means when I leave here, I can't guarantee my safety. Before when I was on my own, I knew I could fight out of most situations. But now I'll be hindered. Dreykov may be dead, but there will be others in his place and my head will still have a bounty on it." I express.

He frowns as I talk but lets me finish. "Why would you leave here?" He questions a little surprised. "I can't bring anything to the team. I know the only reason that you let me stay before was because you were trying to work out if you could trust me enough to be in this team. As soon as my recovery is done, I'll have to leave." I reply but he just scoffs. "You have value without your fighting skills. Do you know how much work you help me do in the last 8 months? You'd be such an asset for me in my lab. But even if you didn't want to do that and just work in a bar. I pay for this place, and I'll decide who lives here and you're one of them. You're not going anywhere unless it's because you want to." He tells me firmly.

I smile at him, appreciating his support. "But I know that's only half the issue Y/n. The other three have refused to leave your side these last few weeks. I sigh, knowing ultimately the main reason for this conflict in my head. "I learnt to trust and forgive them again after everything they did when they left the red room. I can't be angry at them for leaving for a better life." I admit and he nods. "But I feel betrayed that everything was a mission to them these last few months. Did they actually want me to be back in their lives? Was I still an inconvenience to them? Then there's the whole Wanda situation. I don't even know if what she felt for me was real. And that terrifies me. Because I gave everything to her, I was vulnerable, and my walls were completely down. But now? Now I feel like that love was just used and abused all for SHIELD's benefit."

Saying this all out loud is actually helping. I feel a weight lifting off my chest sharing with someone, that I do actually trust, how I'm really feeling. "Y/n. I know what they did was inexcusable. But I can tell you now that Nat and Yelena were so excited for you to come to New York. I've never seen Nat like it before. She was soft. When we were waiting for your arrival, they couldn't sit still. They had spent time trying to make sure you had everything you'd need in your room. It wasn't just obligation." I think over his words, still unsure how it makes me feel.

"And Wanda. That girl has never been able to hide her feelings. The amount of times I would catch her just staring at you with eyes full of love, a smile on her face. You could be doing the simplest of things and she would be there watching you as if you were hanging the moon and the stars." He smirks at me as he remembers. "But she, all of them, hurt me." I state and he nods. "I know. I'm not saying forgive them. I just wanted you to know, that yes, maybe this was all a mission, but I truly believe that they care and love you. Maybe it'll help you get the closure you'll need."

I instantly pull Tony into a hug, even in our awkward position on the floor. He hugs back within a heartbeat and chuckles. "You're already getting your strength back I see." He says, pretending to choke. "Sorry." I say, letting go of my death grip. He helps me up off the floor and takes me back into the hospital room.

I get about 20 minutes of peace before two assassins darken my doorway. "Can we come in?" They ask. "You've never asked permission before." I snap back to them. "We realise that we've been a bit over the top these last few days and weeks." Nat admits shyly. It's very unusual to see her like this, the confidence drained from her. I nod and they both enter, taking a seat to the side of my bed. "How was physio?" Yelena asks when an awkward silence fills the room. "Ok. I took a step..." "That's great!" Nat interrupted but I shook my head. "Then fell on my ass." I add on and see them both frown.

"I told you I didn't like that, Mark. He's a fraud." Yelena huffs to Nat. "He's a physio Yelena, he's just trying to help." Nat defends. "Then why did our sister end up on the floor?!" Yelena shoots right back. I find it quite amusing seeing their little back and forth. It used to entertain me greatly back in the red room. It was some of the only humour I got.

After their bickering ends, Nat has been able to convince Yelena to not kick Mark's ass. "Did you just come in here to argue or was there something else you wanted?" I say when they finally stop their fight. The two of them look between each other and sit up straighter. "We would like to talk. But we'd also appreciate if you would let us finish before you say anything." Nat answers. I sigh but wave my hand for them to continue.

"I'm, we're both so sorry. I know that's not enough. We have let you down and betrayed you twice now. There are no excuses for how we acted this time around. But please know that we are both so happy that you are back in our lives. When Fury told us that he found you, we were so happy. We had heard rumours you were dead and that broke us because we thought we missed our chance to make things right. But when we got the chance to do that, we royally fucked up." Nat starts, Yelena nodding along the whole time.

"We have always trusted you. Although it may not seem like it. We were scared we'd lose you and wanted to do everything in our power to keep you safe and with us. So, we listened to Fury and agreed to this stupid mission. But it back fired and you ended up getting more hurt than either of us thought possible." Yelena now takes her turn to speak. I've never seen her talk with such sincerity before. No sarcasm or snarky comments.

"You died. We watch you die and then watched as Bruce fought so hard to bring you back to us. It was all our fault, if we had just been honest from the start, you'd be fine now. Not having to learn to walk and do basic things all over again." Nat takes a breath before looking at Yelena, who gives her a sad nod. "We know that you probably won't be able to forgive us and, as much as it hurts, we're ok with that. We just wanted you to know, that it was real to us. All of it." She finished her little speech and I let the words sink in.

They both give me a smile and stand up to leave. I watch as they get closer to the door. I'm sure they're walking slowly, hoping I call after them. "Oh, I'm going to regret this." I mumble to myself. "Wait!" I call after them. They both spin around to face me again. Expectant looks on their faces. "You're right. I'm not sure if I can forgive you. Not easily anyway." Their faces drop at my words, and I notice Yelena reach out to Nat's hand, seeking comfort. "You know, I worshipped the ground you walked on when we were in the red room. I would go to bed every night and dream of what we'd be like when we would finally escape and be free. This is far from that dream." I share and they both nod.

"I'm willing to try to, you know, maybe work things out." I say almost at a whisper. Both eyes suddenly lock on to me, but I can't meet theirs. "But there can't be anymore lies and you need to be patient with me. I don't think we can fall back to how we were." I explain, finally lifting my head to see my two sisters, who's eyes have tears brimming in them. "Really?" Nat whispers and I nod. "oh pauchok. I promise, we'll do everything you ask. We won't fuck this up this time." She replies through a cry.

"Can we hug you?" Yelena asks timidly. I nod hesitantly, but the moment both of them wrap their arms around me, I feel safe again. There is a part of me that hates that I feel like that so easily. I still want to be mad and angry at them. But I'll take this moment, this feeling. It's a long way, but I hope maybe we can get some resemblance of the relationship we used to have.

The next few days are like the others, though the tension with my sisters is a little less. I thought that after our talk they would be back to working and backing off a little. But they don't, they promised me there were here until I was fully recovered, and they were sticking by it but promised to respect my boundaries. I really appreciated it.

I had noticed that Wanda had been around less. I thought it wouldn't bother me, but I guess I found comfort in her presence. But I can't blame her, I haven't been the nicest person to anyone recently, and regardless of what happened between us, it's no excuse for me to be a dick.

Today I was having a rough day. Physio was hard, although I'm getting a couple of steps at a time now, the frustration that it's not progressing quicker really hindered me today. I fell, a lot, and I'm hurting. My mood is low and I'm really just not in the mood to see anyone. But tonight, my sisters decided they didn't want to respect my boundaries.

"Come on! Up in the chair, you're getting out of this room and getting some fresh air." Nat orders with a big smile on her face whilst Yelena is fighting with me to put a coat on. "I'm quite comfortable in here. Please just take your cheeriness away from my dark cloud today!" I complain. Both of them just laugh at me. "Oh, mladshaya sestra. Let us help to cheer you up." Nat cooed. I reluctantly agree, knowing that it'll be easier than fighting. Besides, I've barely been outside since I ended up in the medical wing.

They help me up into my chair and roll me to the small lake in the grounds of the compound. As I get closer, I see a familiar red head, standing awkwardly, picking at the skin around her finger nails. It's then I notice the picnic blanket and food dotted around. "Well, have a nice evening." Yelena says, letting go of my chair, which carries on rolling as it's on a slope. "Hey, what?! Wait!" I call after them. "You didn't need to push her." Nat scolds as they run off. "What, the witch will catch her." I hear Yelena defend.

And she's right. As I turn around to stop the chair, Wanda is already there, her hands on the arm rest to stop me going any further. "Hi." She squeaks when our eyes meet. "What's this?" I ask, pointing towards the little set up. She rolls me closer and offers to help me out of the chair, still not offering an explanation. I raise my eyebrow at her not letting her help until I get some idea of why we're here. "Can you please just sit with me, and I'll explain?" She pleads. Against my better judgement I agree.

She helps to lift me out of the chair and onto the blanket. She is then quickly throwing another over my lap to keep me warm. My eyes are firmly on the ground, embarrassed that I still need help to even get in and out of this damn chair. "You shouldn't be ashamed of it." Wanda's voice breaks through my thoughts. "It's not weak to need help." She adds on. I sigh and look at her. "I'm sure you didn't bring me here to talk about my wheelchair." I say, a hint of frustration in my voice.

She quickly shakes her head. "I love you." She blurts out and it takes me by surprise. I can tell by her body language there is no lies, but I still find it hard to believe. "Yes, it started as a mission, but it very quickly stopped being one for me. All the feelings I had, have, for you are real. I never should have agreed to the mission in the first place, but I was desperate to prove myself to Fury. I didn't even stop to think about feelings through it all. But once I started to fall for you, it was all I could think about."

She rambles on as all her feelings come tumbling out. "I hated lying to you. I should have ignored Fury and just told you the truth. I know that you still probably would have left me, but at least I could have explained it all to you. I'm so sorry Y/n. I really am, I'll regret what I did for the rest of my life." She's crying as she speaks "I wouldn't have left you." I say quietly. "What?" She questions. "If you had told me. I would have been really mad, but I wouldn't have left you." I tell her but that seems to make things worse. I guess it just reiterated for her that she made the wrong decision.

"But you have to understand how hard it is to trust what you're saying right now." I say with more confidence. "I do. But let me show you. Let me show you that everything I felt was real. You can do with it as you please, but at least you'll know the truth." She suggests. I think for a moment before nodding. She raises her hand to my head and red whisps appear before my vision is clouded. I see flashes of all the times that we're together and how she was feeling. It's almost overwhelming how much love she feels towards me. She also shows me the sorrow and pain she felt when I was gone. As my vision starts to return, she's looking at me with tears falling down her face.

"You don't have to forgive me or take me back. I just had to let you know that it was all true. I couldn't bare you thinking that I manipulated it in anyway." I really appreciate her doing that. It helps to bring me the closure that I need. "I'm not sure what to do with this." I admit and she scootches forward a little and rests her hand on mine. "You don't have to do anything. But if you don't push me away, I'd like to try and make things up to you. Maybe we can get back to being friends at least. Maybe one day you might find it in you to forgive me." She replies. "But for now. Just sit and enjoy this picnic with me?" She says but it comes out as a question. I nod and reach out for the plate on the blanket. It's a nice evening and there is no pressure.

It takes time, but I can feel the relationships between my sisters and Wanda starting to mend. They stick by my side through my recovery, along with Tony, and I didn't realise how much I needed that. All of their actions went to show how much they care for me.

A year after the kidnapping, I'm finally up and walking, with the help of walking sticks, but I'm not reliant on the wheelchair anymore. I'm helping Tony out in his lab, as he suggested, and I'm really enjoying it. Problem solving and building tech that helps people is really rewarding to me.

Nat and Yelena are slowly starting to go back on missions but are around a lot more. It took me a while, but I think I'm finally there in trusting and forgiving them. I feel like I have my sisters back. Along with it I gained a family with the Avengers. Something I never thought that I would get.

And Wanda you ask? Well, our friendship really started to flourish and became really important to me. But tonight, I think that friendship could be ruined. But in all the best possible ways as we're going out on our first official date.

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