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the-case-book-of-fanfiction · 4 months

Text

Burns Like Rum

Ship: Astarion x female!human!reader/Tav

Summary: Astarion's hunger worsens every day and you don't have any blood to spare—but that doesn't stop you from inadvertently tempting him at every turn. Luckily for both of you, you've both got the same idea to cure him of his hunger.

Word Count: 7,840 words

Warnings: sexual content (18+), menstruating reader, hungry Astarion, mutual pining, possibly OOC dialogue, vampire feeding, soft Astarion, no particular timeline but Astarion hasn't told you anything yet

18+ Warnings: period sex, fingering, oral (f receiving), hand job, bite kink, blood kink, aftercare, use of the words cunt & cock

Note: For my usual readers, more Stranger Things content is coming, I promise! But this bitey boy currently owns my heart so I'm gonna show him some love :)

☟ Continue below the fold ☟

Astarion was hungry, and it was entirely your fault, for more than one reason.

The first was that, almost a month ago now, you had let Astarion drink from you. He'd been starving, and it didn't help that the others had given him strict rules about feeding, so when he flashed those sad but gorgeous red eyes at you, complaining of hunger, you'd all but gifted him your neck.

He'd practically drained you that night. You had been weak for days. Of course, the others, namely Gale and Lae'zel, were furious with you for letting him drink from you, but the sated, content look on his face after feeding made it all worth it to you. He'd become more comfortable around you after that, too, and you'd considered that an improvement.

It hadn't been all that bad, really, for him to sink his teeth into you and drink until your grip on him had grown so weak that he'd let up to check on you. In fact, it had been...rather pleasant. He'd been gentle, careful, his bite sharp but considerate. You knew then that you'd risk becoming anemic for a week just to feel the pleasure of his hand cradling your neck and head, his mouth against your neck, his tongue soothing the bite he'd left when he'd had his fill.

But in the weeks that followed, his hunger gradually returned, and with a vengeance. It was as if he'd never fed from you at all, suffering hunger pangs he hid from the others—but you noticed, recognizing them from the night he'd begged you to let him drink from you.

You'd offered him more of your blood since then, but he'd refused you every time. He could smell your guilt, your need to make him feel better simply because you felt responsible for his current pain.

"I won't accept blood from someone who feels obligated to give it to me," he'd said, and his tone made it difficult to tell if he was being snide or kind.

Sometimes, you simply didn't understand that man.

And then three days ago, you'd been injured in a fight. It was nothing fatal, the gash in your midsection missing any major muscles and not deep enough to jeopardize your organs, but it was bloody. You'd limped your way back to camp, your head swimming, the world around you growing darker around the edges with every step.

You'd fainted in Astarion's arms—although collapsed was a better word for it, according to Karlach—drenched in blood, some of which was yours and some of which that wasn't.

"You should have seen his face!" Karlach had laughed when you'd woken up the next morning, woozy but fine thanks to Shadowheart. The blood loss kept you off your feet for the day to recover, and Karlach had taken the time to visit you.

"What do you mean?" you asked, although you already had a good idea what might have happened after you passed out.

"You put him in a right pickle, collapsing on him like that, all covered in blood and losing more of it quickly," she said. "He didn't know what to do with you. It was— It was like he didn't want to drop you, but he really did want to drop you, because all he wanted to do was drink from you. Can't say as I blame him—he's not fed in weeks and you turn up with his next meal draining out of you." You hid your face in your hands with a groan. "Why'd you beeline for him anyway? Shadowheart's tent was just a few paces away!"

You glared at her through your fingers. "You know why I went to him, Karlach!" She, of all people, would understand. She had been the first person to find out that, as much as you flirted with them all, Astarion was the one you wanted.

"Well, obviously," she said, "but it didn't occur to you that he might...have an adverse reaction?"

Rolling your eyes, you snarked, "No, Karlach, it didn't, I was bleeding out and suffering from head trauma. I just...saw someone I trusted to keep me safe and ran to him."

She cocked her head to the side. "That's sweet, but stupid."

You snorted. "Yeah, I know—Shadowheart won't stop yelling at me for it."

You hadn't seen Astarion until that night, when the group of you had gathered at the campfire. It hadn't meant to be like that; you'd seen him and had wanted to talk to him, at least apologize for throwing your bloody body at him, but Shadowheart followed you closely to keep you safe and soon the others had gathered.

It had been like a very strange family dinner, made awkward by everyone dancing around exactly why you'd gone to Astarion, knowing a hungry vampire and fresh blood were not a good mix.

The final reason you were making his hunger unbearable made itself known at the end of the night, when it was just you, Astarion, and Shadowheart at the dying fire.

She must have caught sight of the way you kept looking at Astarion out of the corner of your eye, embarrassedly looking away or pretending to gaze into the trees behind him every time he caught you looking. She tapped your shoulder and told you she needed to get rest. The "you should, too" was implied, hanging in the air along with her worry about your healing.

"I'm fine, Shadowheart, really," you insisted. "I won't rip myself open again, I promise."

"I'll keep an eye on her," Astarion promised. "Nothing too...strenuous for her just yet." Something in his voice made you shiver.

She left the two of you alone. You looked first at the fire, then down at your hands, folded in your lap. Anywhere than at him.

You didn't even hear him move. You only knew he had when you felt him sit on the log beside you, one of his hands covering your own.

"Are you alright?" he asked, his voice soft. "I...am sorry I didn't visit you, it's just—"

"It's just that I threw myself at you when it looked like I'd taken a shower in blood and that made things a wee bit difficult?" you interrupted, the words spilling out before you had time to process that you were speaking. Embarrassed heat flushed through you instantly.

But Astarion only gave you that soft, slightly toothy smile. You drank it in, relishing his smile lines and the brief contentment on his face. "Something like that, yes," he said. "I was...worried I might hurt you if I saw you again and you still smelled so deliciously of your blood. I'm so hungry, darling, it's unbearable. All I wanted was to feast until there was nothing left of you, and I'd never forgive myself if I—"

"Stop." You held up your hand. "Please. I don't... Don't be so nice to me, it makes me feel like I'm on my deathbed."

Astarion laughed, throwing his head back. "I'd hardly call wanting to drain you nice, my love." Almost unconsciously, your gaze dipped to his exposed neck and you wondered idly what he would do if you were to bite him back.

Probably the strenuous activity Astarion had promised Shadowheart you wouldn't be doing.

He met your gaze, a sudden depth and seriousness in his crimson stare. "Stick with me, and you might soon be on your deathbed." Pointedly, he broke eye contact with you, letting his eyes drop first to your neck and then further down your body. You tingled, the feeling reminiscent of the anemia that had possessed your body in the hours and days after he'd drank from you.

You realized Astarion was waiting for a reaction from you, hoping for something more than your stunned silence. So you let your eyes drift across his body, resting on his mouth as you said, "Doesn't sound like a bad way to go out."

From the back of his throat came a sound that wasn't quite a growl or a groan, but somewhere in between, just as needy as either sound. "Don't tempt me, darling," he whispered. "I promised Shadowheart I'd keep you safe, and you certainly wouldn't be if I did everything I want."

Your heart skipped a beat. "Astarion..."

He closed his eyes, leaning toward you, releasing a tense breath. "Darling..."

"What if I want to tempt you?" You put your hand on his leg, sliding closer to him.

"Cheeky thing," he said, eyes opening in small slits. "But only when you're healed. I can still smell the blood on you." He sighed. "You have no idea how much restraint it takes not sink my teeth into that pretty neck of yours."

You frowned. "But I am healed," you said. "Just tender. Shadowheart wouldn't have let me leave her tent otherwise."

"I can't blame you for wanting me," Astarion teased, that familiar charm honeying his words, "but I've never been wrong." He cupped your cheek, his touch taking the bite out of his words. He offered you a small, sympathetic smile.

You put your hand to your abdomen, half-expecting to find that your wound had ripped open of its own accord. Your shirt and the bandage beneath it was dry—but a sudden twinge of pain, appearing only once it had been acknowledged, came from lower. You hissed.

Astarion sat up straighter. "What is it? Are you alright?"

"Shit. I think I've figured out why you still smell blood," you said through clenched teeth.

Astarion's eyes dipped to where your hand rested. "It's that time again already, is it?"

"It's early," you groaned. You stood slowly, regretting it instantly.

He tracked you as you moved, his gaze becoming dangerous and predatory. It was the look that had scared you when he drank from you, practically convincing you he wasn't going to stop. Still, his need for you burned through you like rum, its heat spreading through your belly.

"I didn't smell it before, not under all the blood you had on you," he said. His voice was deep, dark, dangerous. "But, oh, darling—I smell it now." He licked his lips and your stomach did flips that were neither pleasant or unpleasant. The hunger in his eyes was palpable

"I, ah, have to go. For your sake and mine. Um. So, uh, goodnight, Astarion. I...I'll see you when this is all over."

He stood up quickly. "Darling, do you need—" He cut himself off as you waved away his concern, crossing the camp to your own tent.

"No! Goodnight!" you called over your shoulder.

Astarion sighed. "...Night."

~❊~

You avoided Astarion like the plague. Well, perhaps not, because while you never wanted to see the disease, you were always on the lookout for your favorite vampire.

You caught glimpses of him through the open flaps of your tent, sauntering by with a swagger you found unfairly attractive. You saw him reading on his own when Shadowheart helped you changed your bandages, his handsome face fixed in concentration. A few hours later, you heard him arguing with Gale about the very same book, which had apparently gone missing, and you hated the flutter in your stomach at the growl in his angry voice.

"Stop that," Karlach said, glancing up at you as the pair of you cooked, Karlach helping you roast root vegetables evenly.

"Stop what?"

"Mooning over him," she said, jerking her head in Astarion's direction.

Your body flushed with heat. "I'm not—"

"You are, and we can all tell, and you should just get it over with, but only if you mean it."

You frowned, tearing your eyes away from the blessed sight that was Astarion basking in the sun. "Sorry, what?"

Karlach sighed. "If you sleep with him—" You spluttered. "—it had better be because you truly want him and not because you're bleeding."

You blinked at her. "Karlach, of course I want him, you've heard me talk about him before this!"

"I know, I know," she relented, "but I have a feeling there's more to our vampire than meets the eye." She glanced over at Astarion. "Just...be kind to him, dear. He's more fragile than he looks."

You followed her gaze over to him. He was stretching, his arms lifted high above his head, undoubtedly oblivious to the two of you watching him. Want and need bubbled up inside of you, both clamoring for Astarion, agreeing that he would fulfill them both. The deep-seated lust you'd had for him since he'd first put a knife to your neck burned even brighter as the breeze that had been kicking up dust all morning played with the silver hair curling around his ears.

His nostrils flared and you knew he'd smelled you. He looked over at you and Karlach and you froze. She waved cheerily, then frowned at you when you didn't move. You swallowed harshly and went back to removing the scales from the fish in your lap.

"He doesn't like not being around you either, you know," Karlach said, returning to the task at hand. "He's always looking at you when you're not looking. You're perfect for each other like that."

"I don't want to make this harder for him by being around him," you said, glancing back over at him. He was watching you as he poured himself a glass of wine. Had it been normal circumstances, when you weren't driving him insane simply by smelling like blood, you would have teased him for day-drinking. "He's already so hungry, I'd only make that worse. It was bad enough I threw myself at him covered in his favorite snack!"

Karlach snorted. The sound of a light laugh floated over to you and you looked up to find Astarion smirking into his goblet. He beckoned you over and your eyes grew wide.

"Excuse me for a moment, Karlach," you said, clearing your throat.

Karlach followed your gaze and giggled. "More than a moment, dear. I'll come back later to help you finish this." She left the log you'd been sharing and you waited until she was in her own tent again before you jumped to your feet and practically ran to Astarion.

"Hello, darling," he purred. "Care for a drink?"

"I could go for a little," you said.

Astarion smiled, that rakish charm summoning warmth that spread through your entire body. "I hope you like red," he said, and put his own goblet to your lips.

You held his gaze as you drank. You saw his nostrils flare, his pupils growing large. You knew he could hear how your heart was racing, could smell your arousal mixing with your blood.

He pulled the goblet away from your lips and took another swig. You licked the red wine off your lower lip and heard the breath catch in his chest.

"You're starving, aren't you?"

"You have no idea," he whispered.

"I might," you said. "Thought I'd say it's a hunger of a different kind."

Astarion's smirk was so wide you could see his fangs clearly. "Oh, really, darling?"

You nodded, taking a step closer to him. He breathed in deeply. "We could help each other, you know. Satiate our hungers."

His eyes grew dark, trained on yours. "Is that so?" He raised his hand, nearly brushing your cheek, but stopped himself just before he touched you. "You'd let me soothe your pain by..." His gaze dropped to your waistline. "...eating from you?"

A tremor passed through you at the sound of his voice, deeper than you'd ever heard it, laced with a danger and a seduction you were embarrassed to find attractive. Your body was tuned to it, his words seeming to drop like a stone from your ears to your core, spreading fire through your veins and melting your organs.

Astarion took a small step closer to you and took your chin in three gentle fingers, tilting your head up toward him. For a moment, you thought he might kiss you then and there. "I'm going to need an answer, darling."

"Yes." You couldn't get the word out fast enough. It came out breathy, nearly lost on the wind still swirling between you.

He chuckled. "Well, then. You asked for it." He dropped the hand on your chin back to his side. "Once everyone else is asleep, come find me. We'll find a quiet place and...have a little fun."

~❊~

Of all the nights, it had to be this one where everyone came to check on you before they went to sleep. Thanks to Astarion avoiding you like the plague when the two of you had become inseparable, your monthly bleed had become public knowledge. So practically everyone in camp came to you with solutions you declined, claiming to feel fine, even though your pain had worsened over the course of the day.

You watched Astarion slink off into the forest after the sun had gone down and waited until the others were sequestered in their tents, nearly an hour later, to pull your boots back on, stand on shaky feet, and follow the path you assumed he'd taken.

You had started to believe you'd taken a wrong turn somewhere when you heard his cool voice from behind you: "There you are. I've been waiting."

Astarion stepped out of the shadows. He ran his gaze over you, observing your slightly hunched stance, your hand on your lower abdomen. Your shoulders relaxed at the sight of him; he looked softer in the moonlight. The silver light fell across his curls and the statuesque panes of his face, somehow making that face that was so gaunt with hunger unbelievably beautiful.

He looked like a poet or a god, even in just the simple shirt he insisted on wearing around camp instead of the finer silks you knew he carried with him. Or perhaps it was the simplicity that made him so godly. You couldn't tell.

A frown graced his brow. "The pain is worse now, isn't it?"

You nodded. "Just a bit."

Astarion left the small hill he stood on and came closer to you. He offered you his hand. "Come on, dear, let me make you feel better."

You let him guide you away from the path you had taken and into a small clearing just a few feet away, conveniently hidden by thickets, trees, and tall grass. He stood aside, letting you take it in for a moment, as if waiting for your approval of the place. You looked down at the mossy ground and decided it would be soft enough.

"Well, this is nice," you said, seconds before you heard fabric rustling. You turned and blinked rapidly at what you saw: Astarion, his shirt now off and in his hands. You watched him lay it down where the ground was most level. Your breath caught horribly in your throat at the sight of the scar covering his back. You fought back the urge to ask, knowing it would only piss him off.

He turned back to you with a smile. "Your bed for the evening, my love," he said, gesturing to it.

"Oh, Astarion, I can't, I don't want to get blood on your shirt. What would the others—"

Astarion cupped your face in one hand. "The others will assume I hunted something and got messy," he said. "And I'll enjoy your scent while I have it."

Flutters in your stomach nearly brought you to your knees. You looked up at him, drawing in a tiny breath, and brought your hand up to hold the wrist that cradled your cheek.

"Please," you whispered, unsure of exactly what you were begging for but knowing what you wanted.

"Promise me you'll tell me if...I'm too much," Astarion said, and you got the sense he'd changed what he was going to say.

You nodded, whispering your promise, and wound your free hand into the hair at the nape of his neck, standing on your tiptoes to push your lips to his.

It was a messy first kiss. It was little more than teeth and spit, but it felt like heaven anyway, because his free arm was winding around your waist and pressing your bodies together, his leg sliding between yours. Bliss spread through you, starting at your core.

Astarion pulled away from you. "Someone's eager, isn't she?"

You whimpered and he stifled it with another kiss, softer than the first. He was gentle, more than you'd expected from a starving man. He cupped the back of your head and your hand dropped to his hip. You opened your mouth to him and reveled in the feeling of his tongue sliding against yours. He made a soft sound of satisfaction and pushed his leg up against your clothed core. You moaned loudly, your grip on him tightening. Need flooded you and your hips pushed down on his leg, finding relief in the pressure.

The two of you pressed your foreheads together, breathing heavily.

"Shh, darling, not too loud. You don't want the others to come investigate, do you?" His cheeky tone suggested he would love it if the others found the two of you like this—or, perhaps, further along.

You wrapped both arms around his neck and buried your head into his shoulder, heat burning through you, a mix of embarrassment and pleasure. You felt like there was a pendulum inside you, swinging constantly between wanting to slow down, afraid of coming off as too eager, and desperately needing him to get to it.

Astarion chuckled. "Don't hide, love." He smoothed his hand over your hair. "You do trust me, don't you?"

You kissed his shoulder and heard his breath catch. "With my life, Astarion."

"Are you ready?"

You nodded and he walked you over to his shirt and helped you to sit on it. He watched you lay down, his gaze falling your exposed neck. There was something more than hunger in his eyes; it made your breathing hitch.

Astarion crawled over you and placed his hand underneath your head before he kissed you. You draped your arm over his shoulders, holding him close to you, enjoying the soft touch of his lips against yours. It was chaste, as were the next few that followed it in quick succession, one after the other.

One hand slid down your body and stopped at the hem of your trousers. He tugged at the shirt tucked into them. "Darling? May I?"

"Please do," you said.

"Arms up."

He pulled the fabric over your head and tossed it to the side. He looked down at your torso from where he straddled your hips. His hands skimmed over you and he leaned down, pressing more gentle kisses to your neck and collarbones. Your body tingled with remembrance, practically yearning to feel his fangs sink into your neck, to feel your blood leave you with a burning that felt like intoxication.

"Astarion." His name was a breathy cry on your lips, and you saw how much he liked the sound of it when he looked up at you, a smile curving onto the lips still pressed to your skin.

"Yes, dear?"

You gently coaxed him back up to you with your hand on his chin. "Let me kiss you."

He smiled, brighter than the moonlight falling around you, and you pressed your mouth to his. He hummed happily into your mouth, a pleasant sensation that made you reluctant to break the kiss. But you did, kissing along his jaw and down his neck instead. You nipped gently at his neck, pulling a surprised laugh from him.

"Really, darling? Biting the vampire?" Astarion's eyes were sparkling with amusement. His face had relaxed into an easy smile. It was a good look on him; you liked it.

You giggled and placed another kiss over the bite. The pair of you rolled onto your sides and you peppered his chest with kisses, your arm wrapped loosely around his waist. You went back up to his neck and sucked lightly.

"So much for the others not knowing," he teased.

You looked at him through your lashes. "What if I want them to know?"

"Cheeky little thing," he whispered, dragging a finger down the side of your face. "As much as I love this—and believe me, I do love this—I can't wait any longer. I'm starving, darling. Let me taste you. Please."

Slightly subdued, you rolled onto your back. "Alright," you whispered, your chest tightening in anticipation.

Astarion climbed on top of you again. He undid the laces at the front of your trousers and slipped his hand inside them, moving slowly and keeping his eyes locked on yours.

The moment two of his fingers slid between your wet folds, your eyes fluttered shut and a happy sigh slipped from your lips.

"There she is," he whispered, his eyes half-lidded, as he worked you gently and slowly. You felt the blood and arousal gather on his fingers as he grew closer to your entrance. He dragged them back up to your clit and rubbed in a slow circle. You gasped, arching into his touch. Astarion giggled. "Oh, you like that, don't you?"

You wriggled underneath him, trying everything in your power to get more of his touch. He smiled down at you, kissing your cheek and cooing softly at you. If he spoke words, you didn't hear them, too lost in the pleasure he easily, skillfully, brought to you.

Without warning, Astarion plunged both fingers into your entrance. You moaned, grabbing at his hair. He chuckled, curling his fingers inside you. Whimpers slipped past your lips; you couldn't have controlled them if you tried, but you were by no means trying. His smile grew with every sound you made, and you wanted nothing more than to see that smile.

Just as suddenly as he'd pushed his fingers in, he pulled them out. You whined instantly but he shushed you and removed his hand from your pants. A small streak of blood was left on the skin of your stomach as he raised his hand to his mouth. You watched raptly as he licked your blood from his fingers, never once breaking eye contact with you.

He wasn't even touching you and the fire in your belly grew at the sight.

Astarion moaned softly around his fingers. You watched his deft tongue catch every drop of blood, thinned by your arousal, from his hand. He whispered your name in a whine and you let go of a long breath.

Once he'd licked his fingers clean, he bent down and yanked your trousers off your legs. You spread them automatically and he put one leg between them. He pulled off your undergarments and sat back, admiring your naked body with a satisfied smirk.

"Look at you," he whispered.

The need for him to touch you won out over the desire for him to keep staring at you. "Astarion." His name was a loud whine, emphasized by your writhing hips.

He chucked. "Needy girl." His hand returned to your cunt, his palm applying pressure to your clit while his fingers toyed with your bloody folds. His eyes practically rolled into the back of his head, the smell of blood so heady even you could smell it.

He teased your entrance for a moment and pulled his fingers back up, the tips of them coated in thick blood that looked black in the night. He sucked it from his fingers with a toothy smile, his fangs peeking out over his bottom lip.

You pushed your hips up enough to catch his eye. "Please," you whimpered.

"Alright, love, alright," he said. He put his hand back and slipped his fingers back inside you. Relief curled through you—as did his fingers. "I'll starve myself a bit longer for your pleasure."

You cupped his neck and brought his face to yours and kissed him fiercely. He made a surprised but pleased sound into your mouth and quickened his pace. You gasped against his lips and he ducked his head to your neck, kissing you quickly with every curl of his fingers.

You twisted your fingers through his hair, rapidly kissing the top of his head, pushing your hips up into his hand. He chuckled, his breath ghosting over your skin and raising goosebumps. You shuddered in his arms.

"I've got you," he murmured, sucking a light mark into your neck. You felt his teeth prick you and saw the shudder that passed through his body at the tiny droplets of blood that appeared.

He pulled away from your neck and curled his fingers just so. You groaned.

"Astarion!" you cried, throwing your head back.

He grinned and quickened his pace. You sucked in a deep breath, fighting back tears of pleasure.

"Let go, darling," he whispered. "I've got you."

Astarion looked back down at your neck. He locked eyes with you as he pressed his tongue to your skin, slowly licking up the droplets as they began to run down your neck. The combination of his intense stare and the movement of his fingers was all you needed; with a loud cry, you came on his fingers, your walls clenching so hard around him he could hardly keep moving them.

He chuckled. "That's it, dear, that's it." He cooed softly, helping you through it with his voice, his soft touch, and gentle kisses to your lips.

You were breathing hard when he finally pulled his fingers out of you. You whimpered at the slight pain but realized your cramps had all but disappeared.

Judging by the state of his hand, you didn't want to know how bloody his shirt was. It looked as though he'd reached into someone's chest and ripped their heart out; his hand was drenched and rivulets of blood ran all the way down to his elbow.

Astarion giggled at the sight while you burned with embarrassment. "Well, well, well. Someone's happy, isn't she?"

"So are you," you said, nodding to the bulge in his pants.

He grinned. "Well, what did you expect? You were quite vocal, my needy little thing." His eyes drifted back down to your cunt, lust curling through his gaze. "Tight and wet and utterly desperate for me."

He licked a stripe up his hand, his eyes fluttering shut. "Oh, darling, you taste good." He sucked your blood off of every finger, pleasure sliding over his face.

You smiled. "There's more where that came from."

Astarion raised one perfect brow. "Can you handle another little death?" he teased.

You nodded. "I can take a few more."

He chuckled and groaned at the same time. "Oh, my love, don't make promises you can't keep."

You met his gaze as he finished cleaning off his hand. "Believe me, I can keep it."

The vampire grinned. "Very well, then. I'll eat good tonight."

He kissed you chastely as he put his hand between your legs again.

Astarion brought you pleasure unlike anything you'd ever felt before as his fingers slid over your blood-slick skin, teasing your folds and entrance with a smirk, often just barely inserting the tip of his finger before pulling it out again and tracing over your clit and smearing blood across your skin. He kissed and sucked on your breasts, leaving darkening bruises and tiny scratches from his teeth, licking up the tiny beads of blood that sprung from each nick. He kissed along the line of scarring and stitches you had gotten from your injury, fading fast but still a reminder of what had gotten you on your back for him in the first place. Now that he'd eaten a little, he was intently focused on bringing you to the edge and pulling you back, again and again and again.

He worked another orgasm out of you and was on his way to coaxing out the third when you stopped him.

"Is it too much?" he asked, frowning. His unbloodied hand moved to rest on your hip, his thumb smoothing over your skin. His eyes searched your face, looking for anything to tell him why you'd stopped him.

You shook your head. "I need more, Astarion," you gasped, slurring his name into Astari. The unintended nickname made him blush. "I need more of you. Please. Please."

The smile returned to his face, cockier than before. "Oh, darling. I need more of you, too," he said, looking into your cunt and licking his lips. "I could just eat you up."

You spread your legs wider. He settled between them. "Please do."

He breathed in deep and his eyes practically rolled back into his head. "You're going to be the death of me— Ah. Well, you would be, if I was alive."

You frowned. "Would this even be happening if you were alive?"

Astarion thought for a moment. "Let's not think about the logistics," he decided and licked the drying blood from his fingers off your abdomen. Your body trembled. He lifted your legs over his shoulders. You squeaked and smiled at him.

"Lay back," he whispered. You obliged him.

Wet warmth touched your skin just above your clit and you glanced down at him, watching him slowly lick the drying blood from your skin. He kissed your skin as he cleaned it, leaving you covered in slowly darkening bruises.

You stared at the stars as he pressed a soft first kiss to your clit. You let out a slow breath and he began to suck, his lips closing around it, his tongue licking light stripes.

You pushed your hips against his mouth. "Circles," you whispered.

"As you wish," he said, his breath fanning over your cunt and making you tremble. He went back to his feast, licking in circles this time, and you let out a soft whimper. You reached down and he reached up, lacing your fingers together and squeezing your hand. You squeezed back.

He moved further down until his nose bumped your clit and his lips found your entrance. He moaned, the sound deep and guttural, at the taste of your blood. He lapped at your entrance, his tongue sweeping up the blood as soon as it collected there. You shuddered, your breaths coming in heaves.

Astarion kissed your entrance once before he dove in, pushing his tongue into your cunt. You gasped and he laughed and buried his face in you.

Through the pleasure, you wondered dimly how he was breathing (did he, as a vampire, need to breathe?), but the thought was pushed away the moment his splayed fingers on your hip dug into your flesh and pulled you even closer to his mouth.

The sounds you were making were obscene: your moans were loud and coarse, and your cunt squelched lewdly as he drank your blood and arousal. You felt filthy, aware that the mix was running down your legs and buttocks but knowing the vampire eating you out was enjoying you too much to care.

Astarion himself was quite vocal, moaning into you and making you shiver. He whimpered, whined, groaned, and keened, growing louder with every swallow of blood. He alternated between watching you writhe and squeezing his eyes shut in pleasure.

You watched his hand slide from your hip to his bulge. He palmed himself through his trousers, hissing in pleasure, and the sight was enough to send you over the edge for a third time.

But Astarion didn't let up. He lapped at you, sucking so harshly your pleasure bordered pain, until your legs stopped shaking and your breathing evened out.

He lifted his head with a grin. "How do I look?"

You looked at him and started laughing. He was the smiliest you had ever seen him, his eyes practically glowing, and the lower half of his face was covered in your blood. His teeth were stained red and sticky blood dripped slowly from his fangs. It ran down his chin in rivulets and splatters dotted his lower cheeks like freckles. Some of it was even in his hair.

"You're ridiculous," you giggled. "And a messy eater."

He snorted. "Excuse you!"

"It's all over your face!"

He sat up with a grin, licking his lips. "You mean you are all over my face."

Satisfaction curled through you. "Yes," you said, reaching for him. He took your hand again. "Yes I am."

He wiped his face with his hand and licked it clean once again. You reached up and wiped some off on your thumb, then held it out to him. He took your thumb into his mouth and sucked. Your heart stopped beating.

"Feeling better?" he asked you, lightly placing his palm over your abdomen, applying a little pressure, and rubbing gentle circles.

"Much better," you said. "Thank you. But, ah..." Your gaze drifted from his beautiful, if slightly pink, face and down to his bulge. It was just as, if not more, prominent now that he'd gone down on you. "What about you?"

Astarion smirked. "I like your enthusiasm, but don't worry about me. Not tonight, darling."

You frowned. "Why not? What if I want you inside of me?" You walked two fingers up his leg and slowly covered his crotch with your palm. When he didn't protest and his eyes fluttered shut, you gave him a gentle squeeze. He let out a soft moan through closed lips and tilted his head back. You kissed the column of his neck and bit down gently. You sucked—hard—and a rumbling moan came from his chest.

"Because," he said finally, drawing in a ragged breath. "Because that would be a terrible waste of your precious blood." He looked at you with half-lidded eyes. "When this is over, I promise you, you can have as much of me as you want." He pushed his hips into your hand and you gave him another gentle squeeze. He gasped.

You nuzzled into him and his arm wrapped around your shoulders, holding you there. "And what if I want all of you?"

The question hung in the air. He looked at you for a long time and suddenly you saw the fragility Karlach had mentioned this afternoon, which felt like years ago instead of mere hours. You reached up to cup his cheek and, though you were stark naked, the sexual desire in the air seemed to have disappeared.

"I want all of you, Astari," you whispered. The nickname made his eyes grow wide. "All of you, in every way, for as long as possible. If you'll let me. If you want me, too."

He whimpered, and the sound was broken. You hated hearing that pain coming from him. "I want you, I do, I just..." He closed his eyes and you were suddenly very sure there was a darkness, a secret, he was trying to hide from you. You were certain it had to do with his vampiric master he'd so often complained about. "I'll try, my darling, I'll try for you."

You sat up on your knees and cupped his face in both hands and kissed him. You didn't break the kiss once as you pressed your body against his and held him tightly. You felt the scar on his back and wanted to ask but didn't, letting him keep his secrets for now.

His arms came around you, cradling your back and holding you tight to him. The kiss became a long-lasting hug, the both of you burying your heads in each other's shoulders until Astarion pulled away from you, a smile on his face. You returned that smile and sat back on your heels.

His eyes trailed over your body again. There was a note of nervousness in his voice as he asked, "Darling, would you mind...touching me again? I could use some relief."

You grinned. "Of course, my love. All you had to do was ask."

Relief crossed his face. He leaned back as you trailed your hand from his shoulder, down his chest, and back to his bulge. You tipped his head back with your free hand and kissed his neck while you rubbed him. He pushed his hips into your hand, sighing blissfully, and your hand was in his trousers in seconds. He grew loud, thrusting his cock into your hand with a power that surprised you.

"Take what you need," you told him, your voice hushed, your lips directly next to his ear. "Help me give you what you want."

He whimpered, your name a broken cry from his lips, and he cuddled into you as he came. He buried his head into your neck, hiding his eyes and barely holding back grunts. As his thrusts grew weaker and you slowed your hand on him, you felt hot tears on your neck and wondered what this poor man had been through that he hadn't yet told you.

You removed your hand from his pants and he immediately wrapped you in another hug, one strong enough to knock you down and knock the breath of you. You held him as tightly as he held you.

When Astarion at last pulled away from you, his tears had stopped but his eyes still shone with them. He kissed you softly.

"Thank you," he whispered. "I... Thank you."

You brushed some of his hair from his face. "What's wrong?"

He shook his head. "Nothing. You were... It's just that no one has cared about me during sex in a very long time and...you did. So...thank you."

You took his hand and squeezed it. "Oh, Astarion," you cooed. "I always care about you. Like this or otherwise. You could stop this right now—or before it even began—and I wouldn't have stopped caring about you."

He smiled. "Oh, darling. I love the sentiment, but I'm not done with you yet."

Astarion kissed down your body and laid between your legs again. He licked another stripe up your cunt and you saw the coating of blood on his tongue before he swallowed. "Shall we try for a fourth? Or perhaps even a fifth?" He raised his brow, leaving the decision up to you.

You laid back. "We'll try for as many as you'd like," you said.

He bared his teeth in a feral grin. "All night it is!"

~❊~

You woke up the next morning sore and alone and with very little sleep.

Astarion had been relentless and stopped only when you simply couldn't take it anymore and he was practically drunk on your blood—all without making you bloodless and woozy. When you had finished for the final time, he had cleaned you up, helped you back into your clothes, picked up his own shirt, and walked you back to camp. He was so gentle that you didn't even mind the teasing about how you limped.

Dawn hadn't been far off as you each went back to your tents after exchanging a final, solid kiss. So you woke to the sound of everyone else beginning their day just a few hours later.

You felt the soreness in your core before you even moved. Biting back a sigh and not regretting it one bit as you pictured Astarion's happy, bloody face, you rolled over and hoped your recent injury would be enough for the others to let you sleep in.

You were wrong.

Shadowheart opened your tent a few minutes later with a urgency that made you jump.

"What? What's wrong?" you asked, blinking blearily in the bright sunlight.

"Are you alright? You never sleep in, you're always up making breakfast!"

You groaned. "Is that it? Are you just hungry?"

She peered at you. "Are you hurt? Did your wound reopen?"

"What? No! I'm fine, I'm just tired, that's all! I have lost a lot of blood recently, in case you forgot."

She sighed. "Oh. Alright. Well, just know the others are worried, too—Astarion especially."

You remembered how he'd checked in on you last night and had asked if he'd hurt you at all when you'd returned to camp and wondered if you had worried him by sleeping in. Suddenly you were grateful the others could chalk it up to his not-so-secret crush on you.

You dressed and hid the light bruises on your neck and collarbones in a high-collared shirt. You only noticed you were walking with a slight limp still after you'd left your tent and made your way across camp.

Karlach called your name and was at your side immediately. "You're limping! Are you hurt? Do you need me to fetch Shadowheart?"

You blinked at her. "What? No. I'm fine!"

"You don't look fine," Gale said, a few feet away, looking up from the book he'd been engrossed in for days. "Did you hurt your leg the other day? Or have your stitches ripped?"

"My, my," said a suave voice behind you. You turned and found Astarion grinning like a cat. "You do have quite the limp, there, darling. Are you sure you're alright?"

You huffed at him, your body remembering his touch immediately, his ghostly hands sliding across your skin. "I'm fine, I promise. Now hush and someone help me make breakfast."

Both Karlach and Astarion sat with you, Astarion very close to you and giving you a smile you couldn't help but return. Karlach stared at Astarion like he'd grown two heads, her gaze flickering between the two of you. She gasped very suddenly.

"Not a word," you hissed at her, knowing she'd figured it out.

Astarion smirked.

"And nothing from you, either," you added. "You're the reason I'm walking like this, you bastard."

He smiled sweetly at you, catching the fondness in the words. "And I gladly will be again." He took your hand and lifted it to his mouth, kissing it. Your eyes grew wide.

Karlach squeaked.

"You know nothing," you told her. "At least for a little while."

"Yes," Astarion agreed. "At the very least, tell Shadowheart nothing—I broke my promise to her to keep our dear girl from doing any strenuous activity."

You turned red and Karlach groaned, "Not before breakfast, please!"

Astarion opened his mouth—undoubtedly to say something about how you were technically his breakfast, based on the hour you'd returned to camp—but you moved quicker than he could speak. You grabbed him by the collar and yanked him toward you, kissing him heartily to shut him up.

A heavy silence settled over camp. You cracked one eye open and found the rest of your companions staring at the pair of you, mouths agape and eyes wide.

"Oops," Astarion muttered, sounding rather pleased.

You cleared your throat. "I, ah, I've been meaning to tell you all. Honestly."

Gale heaved a sigh. "How much do I owe you, Wyll?"

Your jaw dropped open. "You placed bets?!"

"Alright, you bloodsucker," Wyll said, holding his hand out and waiting for his payment from Gale. "You win."

"Yes," Astarion said, and you expected him to be wearing a smirk infused with his charm, his triumphant eyes on the others. But when you turned to him, he was staring at you, a dopey smile fixed on his face. "Yes, I did."

☞ ❊ ☜

Baldur's Gate 3 // Astarion Acunin

part 2 (Sweet Like Wine) {here}!

Taglist: {comment and let me know if you'd like to be added to the Astarion taglist!}

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bonny-kookoo · 6 months

Text

Jungkook

𝐇𝐨𝐭 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 🔞 | Oneshot

"Does he even pay you?"

Tags/Warnings: Idol!Jungkook, fuckboy!Jungkook, friends with benefits situation, major angst, mentions of sex work, smoking, smut, god so much filth, Dom!Jungkook, big dick JK but what's new, did I mention angst?, protected sex, multiple rounds, multiple positions, a brief thighjob, so many feelings

Length: 7k+ words

There is no taglist for this fic. This is a Oneshot.

♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

"How does it feel to be a celebrity and ending up with me?" You wonder at him over the music, making him frown before he shakes his head, pulling you in by your hands he's holding.

"What're you talking about babe?" He argues softly, letting go of your hands to hold your waist now. "I've got the prettiest girl at my side, in my opinion. Can't complain whatsoever." He tells you into your ear, voice raised a bit and slightly raspy from his last smoking break.

You just shrug, enjoying the music when some people approach you, talking to Jungkook about something you don't listen in on, even though he's still holding you close. It's none of your business, you really don't want to get too involved with his work and everything around it, but it's clear that he likes to do exactly that.

Jungkook wants you around all the time. Doesn't matter if it fits the scene and situation, if he can invite you or bring you along, he will.

Fans don't know your connection to him. They constantly battle it out in comment sections that you're just a translator, nothing else, that you're staff so of course you have to travel alongside him. And just how they can seem to connect everything to dating if it fits their 'ship' they've got inside their minds, they're also talented in finding thousands of (sometimes frankly ridiculous) reasons as to why it cannot possibly be true either.

While before, someone wearing the same jewelry as Jungkook was a confirmation of a relationship, with you its just pure coincidence. You're an adult woman, you can choose whatever necklace or ring you want, that doesn't mean you're dating him. You're wearing the same t-shirt he wore just a day ago? Maybe you just own the same, or he was nice enough to lend it to you for one reason or the other. Seen near his hotel room? Well of course, you're staff!

The truth is, that you're not even staff at all- but you're also not dating him.

Jungkook has become awfully… comfortable in his trust that fans will brush off every rumor floating around. It's why he's shamelessly grabbing your tits from behind right now just for the fun of it, lips kissing your neck as you slap them off to hold your waist instead. "They'll call it AI-generated or something." He laughs, but you can't shake off the feeling of doubt about that. "And there's no one here filming anyways. It's a private VIP zone, so relax baby." He chuckles, swaying you with him to the beat.

He's right that this is a secluded zone- but that's never stopped anything ever before, did it. One random Instagram live where you're both seen in the background and it's over. For both of you.

"Let's go back to the hotel though. I'm horny as fuck." He laughs, making you roll your eyes with red cheeks to go with.

Jungkook is a shameless person- he doesn't see anything wrong with the things he says or does if they're not hurting anybody. He's got his own opinions and he stands by them, only ever shifting his stance if there's undeniable evidence of him being wrong shown to him. And he also enjoys the more physical aspects of love.

Jungkook enjoys sex to its fullest.

He used to sleep around quite often, his charm and also wealth and status enough to make the act of finding someone willing fairly easy. Most wouldn't be believed anyways if they openly said he'd slept with them- he made sure they never took pictures or god forbid videos, and he also never stayed the night, most of the time preferred the security of his own home where he could politely tell them to leave after the deed was done, his reasoning always having to do something with his work.

'I'm sorry, I got called up to the studio.'

'Fuck I forgot I had a flight early morning tomorrow.'

'I'm really sorry, ah this is awkward, but my manager just told me to a live now, and I can't have you being seen.'

You knew he did this. You were staff at some point, after all, even if not hired by his company but rather outsourced during a particularly demanding schedule and many other employees sick due to a viral infection going around in the office building.

You'd been just another victim of his. But somehow, he ended up biting down too hard- making him taste blood, Primal hunger awakened at the mind-blowing experience he'd had, an odd need to keep you just for himself having blossomed from it all. You were a keeper, you still are- and while it's not really love, it's good enough for him. Close enough.

He reminds you, regularly, that it's not love, with how he never claims to love you, avoids the topic altogether, always tells others you're just very close even when it's obvious just like tonight that you're a little too close to just be something casual. But he enjoys your presence nonetheless. Like a dear friend, just with some deeper layers to it.

Some staff call you his personal prostitute. And in a way, you do sometimes feel like that.

Jungkook is that kind of man who could have sex first thing in the morning. Doesn't even have to wake up fully- if you touch him just a bit, he'll come to life in an instant, if he's not sporting a boner already. He enjoys the exhaustion he feels afterwards, always pushes you past your first and second O, keeps his own saved up for the very last stretch all the time. He draws it out to high heavens, has trouble calling it quits.

Shower sex he's mastered, knows exactly where to step and what position to get into to make it as safe as possible. He loves having you on his large sofa, leather easy to clean after you're both done. Sixty-nine is his favorite dinner for two, though he has to admit that lately, he's been enjoying the more closer positions a lot more. Spooning from behind, lotus, you name it- you've become more than just an outlet for him.

He doesn't know what they call you behind his back. What your unofficial status is. They'd never admit that to him, because why would they? No one wants to get on his bad side if they don't have to.

He's on his phone, free hand on your thigh as you both sit in the back of the car that's driving him back to his hotel. He's gonna get out first, make his way inside, while you'll get in later from the back entrance to not raise any suspicion. It's normal. Routine. You've mastered it by now.

"I'll see you in ten." He winks before he makes his way out the car, rushing past some fans who've found out his location, bodyguards already there to guide him inside the lobby.

"Does he pay you?" The driver chuckles, and you shake your head. "Damn." The elderly man clicks his tongue. "Go find yourself an actual man, dear." He tells you as he parks behind the hotel, watching you move, your phone vibrating in your pocket, before it stops suddenly. "You know what they call you, right?"

"I know." You admit quietly.

"And you're okay with that? You're too sweet to let yourself be used like that. Have some self-worth." The man tells you with a kind tone. "I've seen you around long enough to know that you're kind, and a nice person. Trust me, you can and will find a proper man to love you right. But this?" He shakes his head. "You know he just wants you because you've become routine."

"I know." You repeat again, sighing a little.

"You're not what they say you are. You're just a little soft at heart, hm?" The old guy smiles over his shoulder, watching you unbundled your seatbelt. "Trust me, he won't be sad if you call it quits. I've worked for guys like this for more than thirty years- they'll just jump to the next." He explains, and you smile to yourself, before you nod towards the man. "Never mess with entertainers, sweetheart. They'll always break your heart." he offers.

"I know." You say once more, before you exit the car, and get on your way to Jungkook's hotel room.

You don't officially share one, but he still keeps you around for most of the night. You leave whenever he has to do a livestream or if he wants to go to bed, and you come back if he wants you to- but most nights you sleep alone, because he deems it too intimate for you to stay.

Apparently, sleeping in the same bed is more intimate than spitting on your cunt. Interesting.

When you knock on the door, Jungkook opens. Something's off, you notice it right away, but you don't dwell on it, don't answer. It's none of your business, and he won't tell you anyways, so what's the point in just further inducing his bad mood.

It's quiet as he moves around, since he doesn't talk to you, and you don't know what to say. You wait for him to make his move, and when he doesn't, you get up to grab your sweater you forgot in his room earlier, just to have him stand behind you, hands on your hips. "I didn't forget about you." He chuckles, and you let the fabric slip out of your fingers and back onto the floor as he kisses the crook of your neck.

Maybe jungkook is indeed using you. But you've started to use him just as much, if only to even out the odds, and make yourself feel more than just cheap company.

He slips out of his shirt. You raise your arms to help him take off yours, your naked skin at this point almost a requirement for him every time he takes you. He used to be satisfied with just fucking you somewhere quiet quick and simple to quench his thirst, but over the course of time now nearing an entire year, he's become more and more hungry. Like he wants to crawl underneath your skin at some point, the Idol constantly pushes himself more and more inside your body, not just in a sexual sense. He buys you clothes he thinks will look good on you, has a playlist just for when you're at his place filled with somber lovesongs more about heartbreak than anything else. He claims he didn't look up the lyrics, but you know he's lying. He knows a lot more english than he admits, just so he can pull the 'I don't understand' card whenever he's asked a question he doesn't want to answer.

He lets you wear his clothes without much comment by now, has gifted you jewelry he's worn and liked, laughs any mention of that being 'such a sweet gesture' off if anyone around him mentions it. He's not your boyfriend, but he surely is starting to act like it- maybe the lines are blurring for him just as much as they do for you?

People around you have started betting. On when he's gonna have another one, when you'll be 'swapped out' for something else, or at what point he's gonna make it official that you're indeed more than just nightly company. You don't await that day. It's never gonna come anyways.

"Turn around." He commands, and you do, because that's the easiest way to get where you want to be down the line. Head empty, no thoughts left, fucked stupid by a man who keeps you around for just your body and the familiarity you provide. You don't really mind any longer, long having stopped caring about emotions that are fruitless, bound to rot and die because Jungkook won't ever nurture anything you'd try and plant in his heart. He doesn't want it, and doesn't need it either- if he wants to feel loved, he just has to show his face to his millions of fans always on edge for more content. That's where he gets his love from. Maybe you're just there to feed other desires he can't have fulfilled like that.

He licks his lips as he gazes over your naked upper body, bra long undone by his hands on your back, fingers trained in the routine by now. You remember the surprise he'd shown you when you'd worn one with the clasp up front, face so soft and round for just a second that it felt like you'd just slipped into a dream- but his hunger had quickly returned, because Jungkook is a beast never satisfied. He craves more and more, constantly aims for absolute euphoria, never soft, never gentle.

Jungkook bites. He claims, grips, holds and pushes- he's aware over the physical strength he holds over you, and plays around with the fact almost every night. From tugging on your leg to pushing your head down whenever you decide to please him with your mouth instead for once. Something about the way you swallow around him and swirl your tongue always makes him feral, thighs trembling as the muscles spasm beneath the skin from the force of his orgasm. Maybe that's why he keeps you around. Because you can keep up.

His own shirt is shed, and his hands make quick work of his belt before he helps you out of your pants as well. He'd told you he didn't want to use the bed tonight, because asking for new sheets is always awkward, but he does it anyways- picks you up just to let you fall onto the bed, crawling over you. "What do you want?" You ask out of breath, but he just tilts his head in familiar habit, until it shakes no.

"Don't know yet." He answers. This is new.

Usually he always has a fixed scene set out, knows how he wants to take you right away, but this time he visibly seems unsure where to start. Almost like the first time.

He spits in his hand, doesn't bother taking off the rings, fingers working you up like it's second nature. He knows where to place them, how to move and what patterns to choose- and you don't bother thinking about the possible reason for it. Probably to get you wet and ready quick so he can get to the actual act itself, or maybe he just finds some sort of personal satisfaction from it. You're not sure- and neither do you really want to ask.

You're a little cold, but he'll warm you up soon. Hopefully you won't get sick like last time. Will he find someone else to fuck if you're unavailable?

Who knows. He surely has a lot to choose from, if he so much as asked.

He's got a question on his mind, but visibly contemplates on asking it. His teeth clamp down on his bottom lip, tongue playing with the twin piercings placed there for a second, before he leans in, kisses you. This is one of those things he does that are just outright cruel to you. His kisses full of fever and want feel so burning hot that you're sure you're marked by them for life. Like a signature he's inked underneath your skin almost he claims you again and again like this, with his tongue teasing yours, mouths open and ready to steal each other's breath.

He surely takes yours hostage, every time- and that's probably the smallest crime he commits.

"Have you eaten today?" He asks, and it catches you off guard, eyes opening again, painfully tugged back into reality where he lets his sticky hand run over your abdomen, just to settle on your hipbone. "Your stomach keeps growling." He teases, and you come crashing down. Of course. He'd never actually remember to ask that out of the blue if it wasn't for something reminding him about it.

"Not really." You respond, adjusting your position a little bit, legs trying to pull him closer. "Doesn't matter." You say, and he hums, leaning down again to mouth at your neck- probably marking his territory again, a joke made on a constant whenever you turn up with the blooming bruises on your skin, their origin more than obvious.

"Hm." He hums, almost dissatisfied, but you don't bother to think about it. He moves to lean off the side of the bed, pulling his suitcase closer to get himself a condom, opening the package easily before he rolls it over his length. He seems oddly soft tonight, in more ways than one. Is he still exhausted from the shooting? Could be. He never wants to admit himself that he has to take breaks, thinks that his body can just magically manifest strength from nothing but pure thought, and it used to irritate you, because you felt responsible, in a way. But that was when you still saw more in this than there actually was- nowadays, it's his business, not yours. He's got nutritionists and personal trainers who get paid for taking care of him. It's not your job.

What is your job, really?

Well, you're most certainly not working under his company any longer, and neither have you returned to your original agency either- simply because Jungkook's management deemed you too much of a danger in your position, after the idol had let it slip that you two were having sex on a regular basis. So you just signed an NDA, got paid for your silence, now earning a living by writing books. Modern fantasy novels, where the daydreams you once had can actually become reality, and your hopes and wishes can be dreamed of by other people who have the same.

It's good money. A hobby you cherish.

Jungkook has never asked you what you work as nowadays. He doesn't even visit your apartment, has never seen it before, and he doesn't know if you have family either. He just takes you as his, lets you live alongside him and entertains you whenever he's in the mood for it. And you let him, because these days, he's all you've got. There's not much else you can do than write all day at home or accompany him on his overseas schedules.

You're not sure why he always drags you along, when back home, he won't even call you for days. Maybe he doesn't have to? Maybe his bed at home is always warm. But if that's the case, why not take them on a trip once in a while? Does he have designated women for specific occasions?

Then who will the woman be he chooses to show to the public one day? Number three in his harem?

You can't even truly blame him. As someone he grew up in this industry, his view on the world is warped, shifted, not the same colors as yours. He doesn't feel the same worth in a simple banknote that you do, he can't understand the struggle of missing the bus or having to face an empty fridge.

"Sit up, baby." He tells you, chuckles when you struggle a little to do so- compared to him, flying around all the time actually does take a toll on you. And the petname doesn't make it any better in this moment, as his hands reach out to hold you steady, helping your legs over his thighs, before he guides the head of his cock into you. He wants you close tonight it seems like. Hopefully he keeps holding you, because you're not very energetic this time. "I've got you." He says, and you nod, resting your arms around his neck, hands faintly touching the skin of his back. "Are you cold?" He wonders.

"A bit." You respond. He's probably noticed your icy fingertips.

"I'll warm you up." He purrs, and you nod. You know he will. He always does- always hot hearted in everything he does, even in this. He holds you close, hands on your behind helping you move, your hips rolling a bit too slow for his liking, but he overlooks it for once. You're not sure what's up with him tonight. This isn't him. "You tired, baby?" He wonders, and you nod.

"Sorry." You tell him, but he shakes his head, moves to lay you down, knees pressed into the soft hotel bed mattress as he thrusts his hips forwards.

"It's alright." He brushes it off. "Flight was long as hell." He muses, lazily moving himself. You're enjoying this, even if it's odd for him to behave this way. "Wanna come over for breakfast tomorrow morning?" He asks, and you shake your head.

"Can't." You sigh, arms now moving to lay above your head, eyes closed in bliss. "I fly out back home at 8 tomorrow." You remind him, and you can't see the way his brows lower, face darkening as he realizes he didn't know that. You usually fly back after him. Why are you going home sooner this time?

"Why?" He huffs out, hands grabbing your legs as he pulls your thighs over his, pushing himself deeper now. "You always fly after me." He almost growls.

"I dunno.." You slur. "Management said." You just respond. Why does he seem so irritated by this? It's not a huge deal at all if you fly back sooner or later. He's not gonna call you up back home anyways, so why does it bother him so much.

"Management can go fuck themselves." He argues. "You fly after me. I'll book the flight myself if I have to." he demands practically, slight irritation causing him to have his energy boil up, position adjusted as he becomes more restless, balls smacking loudly against you cunt, pace a lot more ruthless now.

You're finally reaching it. Your head becomes fuzzy.

You don't notice Jungkook becoming almost.. satisfied from that sight of your tension finally leaving. You're nothing but whimpers of pleasure as he slips out of you, hands tugging and pushing your legs and body to have you on your side, the taller Idol now laying down on his side behind you to spoon you, dragging the head of his length through your soaked and slicked up folds. one hand holds up your thigh, helps in opening you up, though you're pretty much gaping from his girth stretching you out moments prior. His lips find your shoulder, your neck, as he pushes himself back inside with the help of your hands-

who suddenly do something new as well, tugging the condom from his cock, making him gasp out in sensitivity. "What're you doing?" He grows.

"IUD." You tell him. "Please-" You beg, and yet again he moves as if awakened from slumber, pushing you halfway on your stomach as he pushes the now bare head of his cock back inside you. This is most certainly new, and he knows for a fact, that he's never going back again.

"Fuck.." He almost laughs, leaning over you now, body covering yours as he just pushes himself in for a good moment, humming a sound of pleasure into your neck as he lets himself relish in the new sensation. "Ah-" He sighs out, before he clenches his jaw, thrusting hard as if to make sure your body will remember him for days to come.

It will. Sadly.

"God, fuck-!" He groans out, holding onto your body now, having turned you onto your side, hand reaching out adjust your arm so he can see your face. Your lips are parted, eyes closed in bliss, and he can't help but have his hand smack down onto your behind that's moving in a way that's way too inviting. He does it a second time, slap clearly heard as he smirks at the way you clench around his cock currently rearranging your insides. He moves your leg to rest over his shoulder, reaching even deeper, hand underneath your belly button pressing where he can faintly feel himself move.

No one can blame him for being absolutely obsessed with your body.

He can feel the way you begin to tighten, thighs shaking a little as you come undone, his hands moving your legs again to close them once more, holding them up, slipping out of your clenching cunt to push his cock right between your soft and wet thighs. it's enough for a moment, though you reach out to touch the tip poking through almost teasingly, making him laugh as he suddenly sighs out, groaning as he spills over your stomach and up your chest. You're breathing heavily, and don't notice you start to shiver, as he parts from you to turn on the light in the bathroom to clean up.

Aftercare is not really his thing- and you've come to accept that.

When you sit up, you stretch your arms in front of you, muscles slowly regaining strength as you wait for Jungkook to finish up, toilet flushing before he emerges again, shamelessly walking without underwear, gaze following you as you walk past him to use the bathroom yourself.

The moment you re-emerge to grab your clothes, he's sitting on the edge of the bed with his boxers back on, phone in his hand. "I booked the flight for you. Tomorrow at 12:30." He tells you as you slip back into your underwear, not bothering with the bra as you search for where he'd thrown your shirt. "Here." He offers- and you slip the garment on with a thanks, only noticing afterwards that that's not yours at all, oversized fabric reaching almost to your knees. "Cute." He comments way too quiet to be meant to be heard, so you don't mention it at all.

"Why is the flight-thing so important?" You wonder, slipping into your socks as he moves around to find the hotel room service menu.

"Because you always fly back after me." He repeats again, clearing his throat.

"…you already said that." You mumble to yourself, but he clearly hears you.

"Fuck alright, god damnit!" He whines in complaint, rolling his eyes. "If you were to fly back earlier, you'll run right into all the paparazzi and shit waiting for me. That's why you're meant to fly back later- so they're gone by the time you arrive." He explains, and you're stunned in the spot you're standing, watching him a bit confused.

So that's the reason?

"It's not like they know." You say, unsure why he's so adamant about it.

"Doesn't matter." He shakes his head. "I'm not having them jump you for whatever reason they might have." He denies, before he sits down in the seat near the window which blinds are shut. "Now what do you wanna eat?" He asks, and you shake your head.

"I'll eat something tomorrow morning." You deny, and he slumps back in his seat, eyes closed and tongue pushed against his cheek.

"What do you want to fucking eat, babe." He repeats, making sure to pronounce the petname before he looks at you with frustration.

"Nothing." You respond. "Are we done?" You ask him, and he shakes his head, setting the menu down before he crosses his arms.

"No." He denies. "What to they call you?" He asks, and you're not sure what he's getting at, shaking your head with brows furrowed in confusion.

"What're you talking about?" You ask, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"What do they call you?" He repeats. "I heard what you talked about in the car when I left."

"How?" You ask baffled.

"Telepathy." He jokes without humor, before he scoffs to himself. "I called you to actually ask you if you wanted to eat something- but you must've accidentally accepted the call without looking, because I clearly listened in on a convo I wasn't supposed to hear." He explains. "Either way, I want an answer. What. Do. They. Call. You." He demands, and you sigh.

"Why does it matter?" You argue, searching for your leggings in the room- finding them over the armrest of the chair he's currently sitting in. "I'm your personal prostitute, just without the pay." You tell him, and it takes him a second to realize that that's your answer.

Suddenly, he wants you out the room.

Not because he doesn't want you here any longer, but because the guilt is eating him alive with ever second he has to look at you. Because the more he think about it, the more it becomes obvious to him that this really must look like just that to everyone. After all, he's just taking you with him apparently for sex, and he's become so comfortable in it that he didn't think about it any longer. It's what you want too, right?

Jungkook has never really learned how to convey his emotions properly. He doesn't know what it's like to fall in love, has no idea what to look out for. He likes spending time with you, and enjoys the sex to the point that he's been monogamous with only you for the past year or so. It's nice to be in a relationship, even though he knows this one isn't normal. It's still okay, because down the line, you understand each other. He likes you, he just doesn't want people to use that against him or you at some point- so he keeps your status to himself. No one needs to know you're a couple. Only you and him. Because.. you know that, right?

"You know that's not what you are to me, right?" He asks, and you shrug.

"Does it matter?" You ask. "It's none of my business who I am to you, or whoever you screw apart from me." You say.

"What?" He asks, crossed arms unraveling. "I'm not fucking anyone but you." He says.

"Cool." You say.

"Cool? That's it?" He argues. "How can you be so calm about everyone else telling you I'm apparently cheating on you?" He worries, and you're yet again confused.

"What're you talking about?" You ask. "That's got nothing to do with cheating." You say.

"No no no no whoa there. Stop for a second." He holds his hands out as if to soothe a raging crowd of people, looking at the carpet. "You- you do know we're in a relationship, right?" He asks you, and your face tells him everything he needs to know. "Oh my fucking god are you kidding me…" He complains into his hands, covering his face in frustration.

"How the hell was I supposed to know?" You say, now with your own arms crossed. "Jungkook, you rarely even talk to me when we're back home. You only take me with you when you've got something up overseas, you constantly tell people we're just friends, you've never even asked me out in the first place!" You argue.

"We've been fucking each other for almost a year, I thought it was obvious I liked you?!" He whines, looking at you with what you realize are tears brimming on his waterline. Why is he so emotional now? "Have you- did you see anyone other than me?" He asks quietly, and you shake your head.

"No." You deny.

"Okay. Fuck- okay." He takes a deep breath, swallows down his panic. "I like you. I don't- I've got no clue if it's love or not because I don't know, alright? But I like you, a lot, to the point where I want us to be something permanent." He tries to explain. "Just us. You and me." He underlines, and you shrug.

"Jungkook, it's not that easy." You sigh. "If this has been what you think a relationship is like, then we won't work out."

"Alright, then what do you need me to do?" He argues, not letting go. "God- fuck, tell me what do I have to do to make you stay?" He asks, voice cracking.

"Jungkook, calm down-" You start, but he shakes his head, swallows thickly, bottom lip quivering for just a second before he licks over it, pulls it in between his teeth.

"I can't-! Not when it sounds like you're gonna leave me-" He worries.

"I'm not, don't worry. I'll stay. Just.. breathe for a second, alright?" You ask, getting up to walk closer, pushing his shoulders back to force him out of his slumped over position. "Hey- okay?" You ask, and he instead pulls you closer, sits you onto his lap, before he clings onto you, resting his forehead in your shoulder. "Why do you never reach out to me when we're home? You're confusing me." You gently tell him, and he shrugs.

"I'm scared they'll see you." He sniffles. "If they do- they'll tear you apart." He sighs. "When we're out here, like this- I can just.. claim you're staff, whatever. But at home- I can't.. I don't know how to protect you." He shakes his head.

"You should've told me." You sigh, leaning into him. "I was hurt, you know?" You tell him.

"I'm sorry. Fuck, I'm so sorry." He apologizes, pulls you just a bit closer. "I don't know what to do." He whines.

"What if you just visit me instead?" You offer. "They don't know where I live. And my windows are all mirrored so no one can look inside." You tell him.

"…since when?" he asks, leaning away from you a little so that you can finally see his face again, eyes red, a stray tear escaping him that you wipe off.

"Since a few months ago? Jungkook you don't even know my apartment in the first place. You've never visited me at all, ever!" You laugh, and he sighs.

"I know, and I.. always wanted to, you know, visit you.. spend time with you but.." He runs a hand over his face.

"You're okay. We talked about it now." You nod, an action he copies. "I'll come back tomorrow morning and we can have breakfast together, okay?" You ask, but he shakes his head.

"No, you gotta stay." He denies. "I don't care if you don't like that, but I need you close tonight." He says.

"Never said I don't." You say. "You just seemed uncomfortable with it." You wonder.

"Because I snore!" He whines, throwing his head back. "I snore, I move a lot, I might cling to you at night or I sweat, or whatever the fuck- I'm not as perfect as I'm made out to be." He complains.

"Jungkook sorry, but what the fuck." You laugh, and he can't help but smile at the sight and sound of you happy. "You can fart and burp like whatever, and I'd still stay. You're human, I'm not perfect either!" You explain, but he shakes his head, leaning forwards to kiss your already blossoming bruises on your neck.

"No, you are." He says. "You're absolutely perfect." He argues.

"Not really." You deny.

"Stop arguing." He complains, squeezes your waist a bit.

"What're you gonna do about it?" You tease, and he looks up at you with a heated gaze.

"Get me nice n' hard and I'll show you." He responds, making you giggle with eyes rolling, as you lean back to tug him out of his underwear, a hiss leaving him. "Fuck, baby your hands are icy!" He laughs, leaning back to hold your legs so you don't slip off of his thighs.

"That's cause it's cold in here!" You joke back, warming your hands up on his already heated length, skin already flushed and swelling as the blood rushes back. His hands travel beneath the shirt you wear, softly grabbing at the flesh of your chest, making you get up to shed your underwear and get back onto his lap.

"Think you can ride me on this thing?" He asks, talking about the seat he's sitting in. "Kinda tired right now, won't lie."

"Huh, making me do all the work now?" You raise your brows. "And here I thought you wanted to take us seriously.." You sigh, attempting to joke- but he clearly doesn't take it as such, face becoming serious again.

"Lift your hips a little." He demands, and you do so- unsure what he's trying to do, before he spits into his hand once more, feeling you up between your legs to check if you're ready. You are- quickly slicking up at the thought of him, and he guides his length inside of you again, stretching you out once more, but this time, it's not just sex.

He refuses to move. He just helps you settle on his lap, but holds onto your hips, keeping you from moving. "Jungkook-" You whine, but he shakes his head, and pulls your face closer to kiss you.

"No, I wanna stay like this for a bit." He denies.

"But I thought we wanted to eat something later?" You ask, making him roll his eyes.

"I'm trying to be romantic here." He complains.

"By putting your dick inside me?" You ask.

"Well I don't know what else to do!" He whines. "I.. I don't really know how else to properly express.." He falls deep into thought for a second or two, before he finally says it. "I don't know how else to make sure you can.."

"..feel how much I love you."

You're quiet for a good while, watching how he rather looks at your neck than at you in particular, avoiding eye contact as he continues to move his hands back to your sides underneath your shirt. "Jungkook…" You mumble, and he cringes.

"Don't-" He sighs, clicks his tongue in irritation. "-don't pity me or something-" He begins.

"No no no I'm not pitying you I just-" You cut him off, now your hands holding his cheeks to force him to look at you. Because you just realized something in the things he's said earlier. "Remember how you said.. you want me to fly back after you?" You ask, and he nods.

"Yeah." He answers, his way warmer palms now taking yours from his face, holding them in his. "Of course."

"That's.. something that also shows that you care about me." You say. "Because, you didn't say that you were worried about someone spotting me and putting your career on the line- but that you were worried about me being in danger." You remind him, and he nods. "Or how you noticed my stomach growling, and wondered if I ate today." You giggle.

"I already wondered if you didn't- cause I didn't see you eat anything." He shrugs.

"See?" You hum towards him, running your hand through his hair. "That shows you care, too." You say.

"But I want you to feel it." He complains stubbornly. "I want you to.. feel the same as I do when I'm around you." He offers.

"Horny?" You ask, and he rolls his eyes, throwing his head back.

"That too-" He laughs. "But mostly.. just, I don't know." He takes a deep breath. "It's hard to explain. It's like chest constricts when I'm not around you. Whenever I'm home, I miss you so bad that I sometimes go to sleep early just to avoid giving in and calling you. I have to distract myself just to not think about you- and yet I still do, almost all the time." He sighs, tucking your hair behind your ears. "When I wake up.." He hums, hands moving to your shoulders. "When I do my morning routine.." He explains, letting his fingers travel over the length of your arms. "When I work out.." He continues. "When I go to bed. It doesn't matter at all." He shakes his head.

"You know you don't have to make up something just to make me stay, right?" You ask him, and at that, his eyes immediately snap back up to you, panic returning.

"I'm not." He denies instantly. "I'm really not-" he urges. "-how can I prove it?" He worries.

"You.. listen, it's not something that you can just clear up in a moment." You sigh. "It's gonna take time. We're basically starting from scratch here." You explain, and he nods.

"Do you.. should we stop then?" He asks, glancing between your bodies for a second. "Until you believe me?" He wonders, and you shrug, before you shake your head.

"No." You deny. "I'd miss you too much-" You tell him, before you adjust your legs, arms around his neck. "-And you'd probably go insane without sex." You tease.

"Not without sex." He denies, watching how you begin to move your hips, letting him slip out until just the very tip remains inside you. "But without you." He clarifies. "It's not sex I want- that's a… I don't know. It's the closeness I feel, you know?" He sighs when you sink back down. "I just like touching you.. being inside you.." He hums, eyes fluttering closed as he leans back into the seat while your hands settle on his shoulders to keep you balanced, pace slow but fast enough to intensify the pleasure you both feel. "Just like that.." He sighs out in bliss.

"I have a really nice couch, you know?" You hum towards him, making him smile while his hands find your waist. "My bed is really big too.." You tell him, and he opens his eyes a little at that.

"Big enough for two?" He wonders, and you shrug.

"Guess we have to find out." You tease, and he nods, hands moving from your waist to your hips before one of them finds your heat between your legs where he can see his cock disappearing inside you.

"Is the couch sturdy?" He wonders, fingers playing with your clit now, making the muscles in your thighs twitch.

"Ah- yes!" You whine, picking up your pace.

"Hm, gonna fuck you on it then." He chuckles. "Stress-test it." He jokes, and you whimper as you come undone, your slick now coating his own legs, strings of the sticky fluid keeping you both connected, wet sounds echoing off the walls of the hotel room. "Break it." He growls, heels on the ground helping him in shifting his hips upwards into you, catching you off guard, your orgasm washing over you in a wave threatening to drown you.

You're shaking, but you still move, needing to feel him reach his high as well, and he does find his own release, spilling whatever he's got left to give, holding you close, kissing whatever skin he can reach from how you're hugging him now, breathing slowly easing again.

And he keeps you like this, uncaring of the food since it's by now too late to order any roomservice anyways.

And for the first time, he actually sleeps next to you, in the same bed-

promising himself to do everything he can to keep you this close, for now and as long as you'll have him.

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook imagine #jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook imagine #bts smut #bts jungkook imagine #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #bts jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook fanfic #bts jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook imagines #jungkook imagines

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mikaleialt · 6 months

Text

Secret Love Song

Bada Lee x Bebe!reader

Angst

"Why can't I hold you in the streets? Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor?"

Synopsis: being in a secret relationship is not easy, especially if you are hiding it to the whole world. — or — the heavy weight of the strained relationship you have with Bada has just become too overwhelming.

cw: major angst, mentions of breaking up, kinda toxic relationship,language, long ass story— i didn't count

When BeBe got invited by Mnet to compete for the second season Street Woman Fighter, all of us were ecstatic, especially our team leader and my girlfriend, Bada Lee.

I know just how much Bada wants to showcase each of her members talents to the whole world, and how important this is for her, especially for her career as a choreographer and dancer.

Before the day of the first filming, Bada and I had come to an agreement to keep our relationship in secret in order to keep a professional image in front of our opponents and to the viewers. I didn't mind it, its not like this the first time we are keeping our relationship a secret after all.

As a matter of fact, our relationship has always been kept private, as we are both professional dancers and choreographers, only a few close people knew about our relationship.

We kept our personal life separated from our work life which let us have a nice private and peaceful life as a couple, just in each others arms with no one trying to pry on our relationship or any personal matters.

Everything is perfect. Everything was perfect.

After the first episode had aired, Bada's popularity blossoms and soon had her own fan base. I was so proud that to see her grow in her career.

But as the team and Bada's popularity grew each day, the pressure to meet the people's expections also rises, and it had affect Bada the most.

After the Kpop Deathmatch Mission, Bada has pushed herself to be better, which means she also pushes the team to be better. She becomes more strict to us, but still kept her bubbly personality when it is appropriate to goof around.

But it all went down when we got the feedback of the other groups for the Mega Crew Mission. When we learned that all of our opponents predicted that our team will be the next to go home, Bada broked down into pieces. The negative feedback had causes her to lose her confident on herself and as her girlfriend, I tried to comfort her.

"Babe, don't mind what they said, they were probably doing this to messed us up, after all we won the last challenge right? We got this, okay? I believe in us." I tried to comfort the crying Bada on my lap that night and although it had seemed to work as Bada was now more determined to prove those people wrong about what they think about her and her team.

But, It just doesn't feel right at all, yes Bada have improved a lot and was now more motivated to do better, but the more she focuses on winning the challenges and mission, the more distant she becomes to me.

After that night, Bada never stopped talking about the routines she can think of for the upcoming missions and how it will be a new step for Bebe.

It was all that she talked about, to the point she even forgets that tonight is your anniversary night.

"...I'm thinking maybe Lusher or Tatter would be the center for the first part and then we will use the..." Bada kept mumbling about the dance choreo and other stuff related to the competition and as a great girlfriend, I tried to be understanding.

I really did try my best.

But it only gets worse from there, with Bada's fame grew more, people can't help but get attracted to her, which is understandable.

It was a typical fan behaviour, and I know that Bada has this charisma in her that just makes her more attractive. But, I drew the line when people starts shipping my girlfriend to other participants like Audrey or Kirsten, heck even Redy who used to have beef with Bada.

It was pathetic, I know. But the fact that Bada was becoming closer to Redy once again after the first battle made me feel insecure.

Maybe it was the additional stress from the already strained relationship I had with Bada that makes me more anxious and jealous when in reality it is just an fantasy fans and shippers had built to satisfy their delusions. But it is starting to get to me slowly and slowly.

And this night is the final straw...

Bada kept staying up late, busying herself with making choreos, too busy to even realize that I'm not even sleeping in the same bed, let alone the same room anymore as I had moved to the spare bedroom in our apartment a week ago.

And the fan edits of Bada with other girls and guys, occupy every single social media I have. Almost like it was taunting me.

I broke down that night. All the stress from the competition and my relationship with Bada is finally having an affect on me. That night I was restless, my eyes are puffy

The next day was Bebe's practice for the New Song Challenge, where we will be choreographing Hwasa's song 'Chile'.

There were cameras set up on the dance studio we were practicing on, documenting the progress of our team. Which also means that Bada and I won't be able to interact once again.

"Ok let's run that part one more time" Bada said as everyone went to their places and the song starts.

During the part of the hook where we are doing the '7' sign with our hands, I was at the wrong position making me bumped into Bada as we danced.

And my blood runs cold when I looked at the taller girl behind me who is glaring at me intensely. I mutter a quick sorry, to which she just ignored and replayed the part again.

I feel like breaking down once again. Everyone in the team Bebe noticed the red, puffy eyes that I tried to hide from the camera by wearing a hat, the dark cloud that looms over me at my sulken face. Everyone noticed that, except Bada.

"Y/n, go back to the first position!" I flinched when Bada raised her voice, she is obviously pissed off at me now.

I am trying so hard not to cry infront of the camera and my crew as I bit my lip hard enough for me to taste a bit of blood.

The practice continues as the tension between me and Bada thickens. Looks like the show found the highlighted drama they want for the next episode.

Once the practice was over and the cameras sre all turned off, I quickly made my way out of the room I was in, not even waiting for Bada as I made my way home, eventhough Bada drove the both of us here.

I stopped by a convenience store to buy an ice cream and some sour candies to shock my system and stop me from breaking down. Before making my way back to our apartment.

And just as I thought, Bada is already there, she has a car whilst I walked home for the most part, so it makes sense.

As soon as I stepped inside, Bada is sitting on the couch, her elbows are pressed on her knees, as her fingers are intertwined.

I can sense she is very angry, but I'm way too mentally and emotionally unstable for any confrontations as I walk passed her figure, attempting to go to my bedroom, which is the stupidest decision I ever think of since it just made Bada even more mad.

"Oh so now you're gonna ignore me? Gonna act like you didn't just walked out after practice and then going home late?" Bada glares at me as I stop on my tracks.

I stare back at her, but all I can see from her is how pissed she is. I can't even recognize her.

Just a few months ago, we were fine, we were happy. But now here we are, acting like we're not even in a relationship.

"Y/n!" I flinch again as Bada raises her voice once again, "What, are you just gonna stare at me like a deer in a headlights? Answer me goddamit? What is your problem? You are so off today, your performance is already way worse than before? Are you trying to sabotage the team—"

Bada's voice faded out in my mind, all I can think of is how we used to be. This is totally different from the secret relationship we had when we are at work.

Bada has become way to obsessed with the competition that I don't she recognize my role in her life anymore. I think she already forgot that I'm her girlfriend, all because of how often we restrain ourselves from showing affection in public.

A lone tear runs down my face as Bada keeps on rambling and nagging me about my performance today.

"Stop fucking crying and answer me. What is your problem—"

"MY FUCKING PROBLEM IS THAT YOU DON'T EVEN TREAT ME LIKE YOUR FUCKING GIRLFRIEND ANYMORE!"

Bada was shocked from my tone and by my answer. She stayed silent, feeling nervous as this is the first I got angry this bad.

"Eversince we kept our kept our relationship a secret from the whole world, you continued the act even when it's just the two of us." Fat tears are now rolling down my cheeks as my legs started to feel weak.

"I'm so sick and tired of hiding everything. I just want to be held by you in public. I mean you did it with Redy, heck you even kissed Kirsten on the cheek after you were both auditioned for the main dancer title on the first mission, why can't you do it to me?" My legs finally give out as I sat on the floor while Bada stood next to me.

"How can you flirt and be affectionate to everyone but your own girlfriend? Am I still even your girlfriend?" I looked up to her as Bada now have a hint of regret on her face.

Bada can't talk back, she was in deep thought as her mind fills with regrets.

"You forgot our anniversary last week, you talk about me leaving you behind earlier while you left me behind on everything you do. You are so obsessed with the competition that you pushed me and our relationship out from your thoughts. Honestly by now I'm justing waiting for you to break up with me." Bada's felt a pang on her chest as she kneels down next to me and hugged me, I let her but I didn't hug her back.

"I just want to stop hiding anymore..." my tone is much more softer now as I hear Bada's sobs. "You even forgot that today’s my birthday..." I tear up again as Bada starts muttering her apologies.

We both cry in silence, as we finally realize how much damage hiding did to our relationship.

"I'm sorry... It hurts me too when I can't hold you in front of many people. I'm sorry I didn't know how much I hurt you until now... I-It was stupid of me." Bada looks in to my eyes as she says those words.

"I'm sorry I forgot about you...I-" Bada chokes on her tears as she just squeeze my hands.

"I wanna get back from all I did the past few months since the competition... please give me a chance... I-I will be better." Bada looks at me desperately.

"Bada, what I want is for to us to stop hiding anymore..." I cup her cheeks. Bada contemplates at the mention of going public and it was very evident at the sudden change in her expression.

My heart breaks even more when I saw that Bada is having second-thoughts about my request.

"...so that's your answer, huh?" I sighed as I tried to stand up once again and walk to my bedroom. “Why is it so hard for you to tell the world that I’m yours?” I said before closing the door. Bada stumbles on her feet as she tries to follow me but I locked the door before she can even enter.

I broke down once again, seeing as there's no hope that Bada will ever agree to making our relationship public...

A/n: this is honestly really weird, I might revised it later but there might be a part two for this... I'm just too tired to finish it right now. Also, here you go, @badasgirlfriend ... anyway hope you enjoyed this—even if it's a bit trashy and incomplete

Requests are open

#Spotify #secret love song au #bada lee fanfic #bada lee x reader #bada lee x y/n #bada x reader #lee bada x reader #street woman fighter x reader #swf2 x reader #bebe #street woman fighter 2 #swf

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kai-anderson-whore · 8 months

Note

Hi!!! Could you do an imagine where y/n is the first serious girlfriend he’s had since Emma so she’s insecure and she gets hate because she’s a good bit younger and has to deal with the fact Evan and Emma still work together on AHS so their fans still want them together. Lots of fluff with a touch of smut? Thanks!!!

Insecure of the ex (Evan peters x fem reader slight smut)

Warnings: hate comments, doubting a relationship, being compared to an ex, smut, heavy kissing, p in v sex nothing too major, fluff

Word count: 1,4k

A/n: in my flop era xoxox

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The dim light lit up the room the coffee cup in your hand, your phone in the other. Evan your boyfriend of two years sat on the other side on the room watching tv. You had just posted a picture of you both on instagram it was a picture one of your friends took when out for dinner you were cuddling into Evan, his lips on your head hugging you close with the caption "here's to two whole years with you my love, and many more 💕💕".

You loved the picture one of your favourites. You received nice comments from your close friends and family congratulating you both on the milestone. But you couldn't help but notice the negative comments. "They won't last any longer", "I miss Emma", "he's probably going to go back with Emma", "she's so much more younger than him probably only with him for the money", "god I hate her #evan&emma". You knew you shouldn't have let it bother you but it did.

Sure you were a couple of years younger than Evan five years to be precise but you weren't with him for his money. You loved Evan you both met at a convention and hit it off from then on sure it wasn't too long after his split from Emma roberts. He still worked closely with her in ahs which did make you feel unsettled but you learned to get on with it since Evan loved working on the show despite his ex girlfriend being there too.

But the comments on each post didn't stop you from getting into your head. You wondered why he was with you, was he just using you to get over Emma and you were just sticking around to something that means nothing to him. You didn't know. Every time Evan was filming for ahs you knew Emma would be there and with their history you didn't know if there was still feelings or not between them. Their fan ship them more than you and Evan it was just something you learned to become accustomed with.

You glanced over at Evan his eyes focused on the screen in front of him. "What time is it?"you asked you already knew the time it was past midnight already but you wanted him to notice. "Twelve fifteen- oh happy anniversary babe" he says after pulling out his phone getting off his seat giving you a kiss on the lips. But you couldn't help but feel hurt at the fact you had to tell him.

"What's this?" Evan asked his eyes glued to your phone. 'Shit' you thought you forgot to lock out phone so he wouldn't see all the comments. "It's nothing Evan really" you tried to dismiss but Evan wasn't having it. "Come on let's see the post it's obviously us" he smiled taking your phone from your hand his smile grew at the picture remembering the day clearly.

With a short scroll of his thumb his boyish smile dropped seeing all the horrible hate comments you were receiving for the first time. Evan's brows scrunched in confusion reading all the comments. "How long has this been going on for?" He asked the tears pricked your eyes uncontrollably you felt like you couldn't breathe.

"Almost the whole of our relationship, I delete the comments so no one can see but there's so many of them" you started to sob. "Sometimes I think they're right what do you see in me Evan, they're obsessed with you and Emma I can never compare to her" you started to sob. Evan just placed your phone down engulfing you in his arms.

He smelled of your favourite cologne hints of wood, tobacco and citrus notes it was all so comforting to you. Your tears staining his white t-shirt but Evan didn't care about that all he cared was making you feel better and putting a stop to these comments. "Listen to me" he started cupping your chin so you can meet the gaze of his brown eyes.

"They might be obsessed with me and Emma and can't get it in their heads we're history. But I'm obsessed with you okay your the best thing that's happened to me what I see in you is a beautiful, smart, independent woman who loves me just as much as I love her and no dumb comments will change that you can't compare to Emma because your better and I mean that". His words made you cry more but a smile crept on your lips which Evan didn't hesitate to kiss.

"I love you so much Evan I'm sorry for-" you tried apologised which Evan placed his index finger to your lips shushing you. "Don't apologise you have nothing to be sorry for it's natural to get upset and let these comments get to your head and I know me working with Emma still isn't necessarily helping but your the only one for me". you could see the hurt in his eyes Evan hated seeing you upset. Nodding your head you whisper a small "I'll stop apologising" to him before burying yourself back into his arms.

"I'll put a stop to these comments I'll log back into my instagram account and say something I promise" he added kissing the top of your head. You still felt shitty these comments really have took it's toll on you. "Hey look at me" you looked up at Evan again who placed a kiss on your lips, "I - promise- I'll- sort- this" he said in between kisses. His lips continued to kiss you your hands roamed his hair. His body pushing you further down on the couch slotting himself between your legs.

A giggle escaped your lips Evan took those thoughts away a smile once again invaded your lips, "there's that beautiful smile" he sighed happily. His lips peppered themselves along your neck, your head moved to the side slightly giving him more access to you. "Happy anniversary babe" he mumbles against the hot skin of your neck. "Happy anniversary" you sigh in satisfaction completely forgetting about those comments you knew they shouldn't matter all that matters is you and Evan.

His hand roamed your body slipping under your sweater feeling every curve. His lips continued its work along your neck and collarbones. "Evan" you hummed desperately, Evan knew what you wanted and wasted no time in giving you it helping you out your sweater and sweatpants leaving you in just your undergarments. Evan then proceeded to remove the remaining articles of clothing from his body, you took the time on getting completely bare for him showing him every curve and shadow of your body.

"How did I get so Lucky with you" he smiles his eyes drinking all your beauty before him. He slotted himself back between your legs your arms wrapped around his neck, your legs hooking along his waist. Evan gave himself a few tugs before lining himself up with your entrance. Your body quivered as he started pushing into you slowly.

Your eyes rolled back in pleasure as evan thrusted into you in a slow passionate way. Your arms still wrapped around his neck bringing him down to meet your lips. Your lips moved in sync swallowing each others moans. Wanting to be more closer to him if that was even physically possible. “I love you so much” he whispered against your swollen lips bringing his back upon your own.

Soon enough you felt that knot form within you. Evan picked up the pace a little more bringing you closer to the edge. Your moans got louder as you came undone beneath Evan. He stopped for a moment drinking you in a smile forming on his lips, “god you so beautiful” he thought out loud coming down from your high Evan started to chase his own high coming undone on top of you.

You both felt limp laying on the couch not saying anything just trying to collect yourselves. Evan had his arm slung over your frame a small smile on your lips completely forgetting about the comments. “I’ll sort all that out I promise” he broke the silence nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck placing a lazy kiss there. “I know thank you Evan” you sighed tracing your fingertips along his back.

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writing-for-life · 15 days

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Right, okay, I’ve thought long and hard whether to write this:

A squick (even a strong one) is not the same as a trigger.

Emotional discomfort, even emotional discomfort that leads to low-level physical symptoms like e.g. mild nausea, is not trauma. Unfortunately, TikTok pop psych has done nothing to help people understand the difference, because the trend to perceive (even strong) emotional discomfort as equivalent to a trauma response is worrying and neither helps people with nor without PTSD. I don’t wish it on anyone to actually find out the difference if they haven’t yet (disclaimer, since this is unfortunately necessary these days because everything gets misconstrued: I am not talking about individual experiences, because only you can know about those. I’m talking about wider trends in an often young audience with not enough background info to be able to tell apart sound medical/psychological info and viral BS created by “influencers” for some kind of personal gain).

What people in the current fandom spat want to have tagged as “triggers” are overwhelmingly squicks. And we’re probably all guilty of quickly saying “that triggered me”, myself included (and I’m a licensed psychotherapist, shame on me). It has become somewhat of a shorthand for “extremely annoyed or grossed out”. But when it gets used in the context of tagging, it’s good to remember that no one owes us a tag list the length of our arm just because we don’t like certain things. Even if we strongly dislike them.

And even on the occasion someone else’s yuck or yum is an actual trigger for us, it is impossible to cover for every possible trigger, because in theory, EVERYTHING has the possibility to trigger someone somewhere.

E.g., a certain smell in a supermarket holds the rare possibility of triggering someone, but do you see disclaimers at the supermarket door that say, “May smell of 484 different things, which are in detail [list of 484 things] and might be different tomorrow. Plus, we might have a customer today who smells of that perfume that brings up your triggering childhood memories. Or maybe we won’t, but just on the odd chance we do, we thought we’d rather cover it”.

There might be one person with a very specific trigger that does literally nothing to the vast majority of people. Do we expect everyone on Tumblr to tag for “eyebrows” or “white T-Shirt” because of that? How about that person just puts “eyebrows” or “white T-Shirt” in their content filter instead?

Do we really suggest to put that type of responsibility on creators? More importantly: Who are we protecting that way? All we do is put people into bubble wrap and shift responsibility for our mental wellbeing away from ourselves to others.

We are trying to tell other people what to do for our own comfort. That’s controlling.

If we’re squicked out by something, there is a simple solution: we can stop looking or reading. We can use content (not tag) filters. In the worst case, we can block. We don’t have to put that type of responsibility for our personal sensitivities on creators (or people who reblog, for that matter).

We can tag for certain things as a courtesy, I’m all for it. I love being able to filter out stuff I’m not into, and I sometimes wish people would tag better or not tag a certain way (getting ship tags for a ship you’re not into slapped on your character-metas is annoying 🤣). But I don’t die, neither does it cause me unbearable distress, if I see cows where I don’t expect them. Scroll past or block. And if I’m worried about mature topics like nudity or violence: Tumblr has a community label for mature themes you can (and in my view should) use if in doubt. Funnily enough, many people don’t do that though—maybe because they worry about reach?

Of course we should include content warnings where they are due, no one says we shouldn’t. It’s also fair if a creator doesn’t wish to do that beyond general warnings (no specifics) though because they might give away, say, major plot points that way. In that case, general disclaimers like “contains depictions of violence”, or whatever it might be individually, are a good idea. And if that’s not specific enough for us despite knowing that “violence” in general might also contain our personal trigger, we might need to make the decision not to read it to stay safe, but we shouldn’t have a go at the writer for not tagging very specific things that might be considered spoilers.

Long story short: If we assume people are “triggered” by werewolves with vulvas or non-human characters, it might be worth thinking about whether we’re just talking about squicks that very much fall into the category of “personal responsibility”. And there are plenty solutions to that at our end—we don’t need to put that on creators…

#fandom problems #fandom entitlement #fandom stuff #squicks #vs #triggers #tagging #being grossed out or strongly disliking is uncomfortable #but it’s not the same as being triggered

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kidnappedbycartoons · 9 months

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Back on my Zutara tip again

You already know why I'm here. Zutara is on my mind. I know a lot of people talk about the Southern Raiders episode when it comes to them, and I get it. It's another one of their big moments. It's a pivotal point in their relationship. You cannot talk about them without talking about that episode, literally impossible. But, I want to focus on the little details after that episode. Because they are just as important to the ship as that episode is.

So, the next episode after is the Ember Island Players. Besides, what I find so funny about this episode is how, we are able to see how close Zuko and Katara have become, but at the same time we are seeing the distance between Katara and Aang. I laugh.

So, I'm trying to figure out why Zuko specifically wanted to sit next to Katara. No this might be small to some other people, but I see the interaction between Zuko and Aang about the whole seat thing, as a demonstration of the maturity difference between the two. At first, Aang tries to get Zuko to give up the seat ("I wanted to sit there"), but it's literally not a big deal. And Zuko tells him this ("Just sit next to me. What's the big deal?"). Like Aang, baby, you can handle not sitting next to Katara for a few hours. And then he sits down and he's sulking. Like...it's really not a big deal.

Besides that though, we are able to see just how comfortable they have become with each other. She's joking around with him, teasing him about the actor's portrayal of him. Katara even checks up on him after seeing the scene between him and Iroh. There's clearly no bad blood between either of them. And, I'm not going to comment on that stupid play, because we all know who the writers were targeting. And, I don't see anything wrong with the Zuko and Katara inching away from each other and being a bit uncomfortable with the actors romantic scene. Because, they just became friends, y'all. Let's give them time to chill. But you see, that's the beauty in this. We are seeing the two of them become more comfortable, more open, more friendly with each other as these episodes progress. There is such a clear development between them.

During Sozin's Comet, once again. Zuko and Katara have gotten closer, but Katara and Aang don't seem to be on the same page as much anymore. We see them arguing much more in the later half of book 3 than we ever did throughout the whole series. But funnily enough, while Zuko and Katara were on opposite sides for the majority of the series, they are closer than ever during the later half of book 3.

Anyway, I just love these episodes for these two, because we really see the trust between them. Like, it's in the little details. Katara is the one to invite Zuko into the group hug. Katara is the one that initiates teasing with Zuko, by bringing up the baby picture that she thought was him but it was actually Ozai. When Zuko tells Katara to let Aang go, she does. She listens to him. She trusts his advice. Katara is the one to ask him what to do after Aang dips out on everyone. You just know for a fact, that book two Katara would have never done any of this. That's what we call development. For some reason, after the Southern Raiders episode, there's this silent trust between the two that is just so amazing to watch. There was a bond built there. Really, the bond was built back in the catacombs, but then it got destroyed in the catacombs, but then it got rebuilt in the Southern Raiders episode. Love to see it.

We all know the scene where Katara reassures Zuko before he goes to talk to Iroh. But, like I said, it was give and take between these two. Zuko had Katara's back when she went to confront her mother's killer, she has his back when he's going to reunite with his uncle. We see the two of them have each other's backs, be each other's support. One person wasn't carrying all the emotional burden in this dynamic, both of them did. Also, I just love how the first person Zuko thought of to help him with Azula, was Katara. There was no hesitation at all. He knew what Azula was capable of, but he also knew what Katara was capable of too. He knew who to have by his side. And that's trust.

During the battle with Azula, not even, before that. Zuko could tell that Azula is not all the way there mentally, so he chooses to take her on by himself, instead of putting Katara at risk of being severely hurt. Zuko taking that lightning bolt for Katara was important. This has been said before, but it had to be her. It couldn't be anybody else on the team. It was her, she was the first one in the team that he connected with. She was the one that he had to work overtime to gain her trust. She was the one that felt the most betrayed by him after what happened in the catacombs. It could not be anybody else. It would not have had the same impact if it was anybody else. Literally, imagine somebody else on the team in Katara's position, would it really have hit the way that it needed to? No. Zuko literally risked his life to save her without even a second thought.

And after she healed him, the intimacy between them was something different. The softness in his voice as he thanks her, the tears in her eyes, the gentleness with which she held him. Do y'all see it? Something that's just very interesting with Zuko and Katara is the balance between them. Like, it's a clear cause and effect between them, if that makes sense?

Zuko apologizes to Katara and then she offers to heal his scar. Zuko betrays Katara's trust, she is rightfully upset with him, he works to earn her trust. Zuko has Katara's back as she goes to confront the source of her trauma, she has his back when he's preparing to go face Iroh. Zuko takes little lightning for my girl, Katara heals him. You see what I mean? Both of them are putting an effort in building this relationship. The bond between them is also an integral part of both of their stories. Now, I'm not saying that Avatar should have ended with the two of them getting together. I am on the side that says that the ending of the show should have been the team looking out at the sunset, not a make out session between a twelve and fourteen year old. But, what I am saying, is that the potential is there. The ingredients are there. There is something magical between these two. And if not just the fans, but the voice actors, and some of the writers could see it, I don't know what to tell you if you can't see it.

#atla #avatar: the last airbender #zutara #atla katara #atla zuko

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happyhauntt · 1 month

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stay, i pray you — nikolai lantsov.

series masterlist | writing masterlist | askbox

─── summary: nikolai has a decision to make. anya makes it for him.

─── pairing: nikolai lantsov & anya kamenev (original character.)

─── warnings: takes place during seige & storm just after sturmhond reveals himself to be nikolai. angst, hurt/no comfort, pre-established relationship. this one's gonna hurt.

─── word count: 2.1k.

"I've had an idea."

The military encampment at Kribirsk is as familiar to Anya as the freckles on Nikolai's nose, the garden of her father's estate, the brittle ache of her injured knee. Crashing the Hummingbird had not been part of the plan — and her body had certainly not appreciated the impromptu swim in the nearby lake — but the First Army officers had recognised her and Nikolai, affording them all the honours of their stations and escorting them to the commander's tent.

Anya hadn't felt all that comfortable with it. She may have been Lieutenant Corporal before her discharge, but it has become increasingly difficult to love the army that raised her while it serves the country that abandoned her. General Raevsky had once been her commanding officer. She and Nikolai had served under him on the northern border, oh, how many years ago now?

They'd both been green as grass, infantry grunts who'd never handled a rifle, never fired a shot or seen a battlefield begin to bleed. Raevsky greeted her like an old friend when they stumbled onto shore, asked how she was fairing as if he hadn't seen her only a few months ago, before she helped the Sun Summoner flee Ravka by smuggling her onto a ship bound for Novyi Zem.

The tent Anya finds herself in is small but serviceable, with clean, fresh clothes laid out on the bed and a small plate of food waiting on the table. Nikolai disappeared shortly after their arrival, most likely to offer up an explanation to the commanders, but when he finally reappears, he finds Anya combing out the knots of her damp hair with her fingers, changed into a clean, loose shirt and army-issue trousers. She feels as if she never left the army and the thought makes her nauseous.

"You have an idea?" She raises an eyebrow at him as he steps tentatively inside, allowing the tent flap to fall closed behind him. A playful smirk dances over her face. "Given that your last idea sent us crash-landing into a lake, I must admit I feel a little apprehensive."

He huffs at her, an almost-chuckle that sends alarm bells ringing in her mind. A jibe like that would usually send him on a ranting spiral, fussing all about how his invention hadn’t been the reason they crashed and had, actually, worked exactly as intended for the majority of their journey.

Teasing him is easy, and the way he smiles when she does sends warmth pouring through her. Seeing him so subdued is… troubling, to say the least. He hangs up his sword and crosses the tent to perch on the edge of her bed. His eyes remain fixed on the floor the whole time.

Kneeling in front of him, she allows her fingers to graze over the bruise blossoming on his cheek. His eyes fall closed for a moment. "She really got you, didn't she? Our dear Sun Summoner has a mean right hook."

"Believe me, I know. Scrappy little thing." Nikolai flexes his jaw and opens his eyes, and all once, Anya knows. It's written in the tiny lines between his brows and the quirk of his mouth and the ache in his eyes.

"What is it?" she murmurs. Her fingers linger on his face, and he leans into the warmth of her, just slightly. Her knee protests, but she doesn't dare try to stand up. "What's happened?"

He swallows roughly. "I've told you before, haven't I, about coming back here and helping Ravka. About fixing it before it's too late."

Whispered conversations in a dimly-lit cabin flutter through her mind. Wishes pressed against her skin with kisses, hopes and dreams caught up in a lover's embrace. I could be better than Vasily, he'd said, and she had believed that, the way she believed the sun would rise in the morning. I could save Ravka.

She hadn't told him the truth, then. She'd taken his dreams and folded them up into her own chest, to keep safe beside her heart, but she hadn't wanted it the way he did. Anya would sooner see Ravka burn. She cannot bring herself to feel mercy, not where this Saints-forsaken country is concerned. Not after it abandoned her when she needed it most.

Now, she nods. A damp tendril of hair falls past her eyes. "I remember. You said you... you would find a way to convince Vasily to step aside, and your father would make you the heir. But it wasn't a plan. You said you didn't know how you'd do it, yet. Just that you wished you could."

She may never forget it. The panic that struck her, bone-deep. The way his ambitions have haunted her ever since. He may not have known it then, but a ticking clock had been set that day. Anya never knew when their time would run out. Only that she would never be ready for it.

He smiles, now. A rueful thing. There is no need to hide with her, no need to put on that winsome devil-may-care act he wears like armour. She is not a politician he can sway to his side, nor a danger he can charm his way out of, and yet he smiles at her. She is so beautiful, and soft, and she's not wearing her armour, either. Not here, not with him. There is nothing to smile about, and in a few moments it will all be different, but right now she is his, so he has to smile. He has to.

He may weep, otherwise.

"Kolya." Her voice is so quiet, barely more than a whisper, and he is so sure that she knows, already, without him having to breathe a word.

His throat goes horribly tight, an invisible hand wrapped tight around his windpipe, as if that will stop his confession. His eyes flit to the roof for a moment. They start to sting.

"Alina's power is the key to Ravka's survival," he says. Every word feels like lead on his tongue. "The Apparat has turned her into a living Saint, and the people love her. If I'm to make a bid for the throne and convince Vasily to step aside, it can't just be that I'm the best man for the job. That won't matter. But an alliance with the Sun Summoner might sway the odds in my favour."

Anya watches him for a long moment. He holds his breath as time stretches, and eternity seems to pass before she even blinks. She withdraws her hand, allowing it to rest lightly on his thigh. The absence of her touch lingering in his face burns like a fresh bullet wound.

He wonders if you can die from missing someone who hasn't gone anywhere yet.

"An alliance with Alina." Anya narrows her eyes as the pieces click together in her mind." You mean—"

"I'm going to ask her to marry me." His throat feels rough as sandpaper. "A political marriage, in name only. The game has changed and Alina is the only one who can level the playing field."

He keeps talking, but Anya can hardly hear him. Her brain began to buzz with white noise the moment she heard the word marriage, as if her skull is home to a thousand angry wasps and someone suddenly decided to shake the nest. She can feel her blood rushing in her ears, her heartbeat thudding in her throat, but she doesn't dare give herself away.

Anya Kamenev is a soldier, but she is also a future duchess. Her mother would be proud to learn that all those etiquette lessons didn't go to waste. Summoning a decade of training, her old governess' instructions rattling through her mind, her face remains delicate and empty. Not a muscle twitch or a quiver of her lip, not a hint of sorrow flashing in her eyes. She might as well be carved from marble. Her heart sits in her chest like a stone.

"Nastya." The nickname he gave her in their army days is salt in an open wound. Nikolai reaches for her, grasps her hands in his as if she is all that can anchor him to this world. "I don't know what to do."

"Of course you do." Somehow her voice is gentle, even though she feels jagged at the edges, like touching her might make him bleed. An instinct tugs at her, to curl her fingers around his own and hold him just as tight, but she can't bring herself to move. "You wouldn't bring it up to me if you hadn't already thought it through. You're a clever man, Nikolai. The cleverest I know, and don't let that go to your head. You know what you have to do now. You just want my permission to do it."

Is it crueller, somehow, to ask for permission? To hand over her heart, and the knife too, as if that will make it hurt less when he carves it from her chest?

A wet laugh bubbles out of him. "Trust you to keep my ego in check even now, Anya."

"Someone has to," she says. She heaves herself into a standing position, wincing as her knee cracks and tiny bolts of lightning spike up her leg. "Although I think Alina will do a brilliant job. I don't mind handing over that responsibility to her."

"Don't." Nikolai is on his feet in a moment. One hand remains in hers, his grip tight as a vice, but the other curls around the back of her neck. His thumb brushes softly over her cheek. The warmth of it makes her shudder. "Don't say that like you're going anywhere. I'm not sure I can do any of this without you."

"Of course you can," Anya murmurs. Saints, she isn't sure the torture she endured at the hands of Shu Han's scientists hurt this much. If she closes her eyes, she can almost believe he's taken a blade and gutted her right here, like a fish on the deck of his ship.

A ragged breath tears out of him as he says, "Alright, perhaps I can. But I don't want to."

When he kisses her, it doesn't feel like a kiss goodbye. It doesn't feel like their last kiss in a thousand. There's a ferocity to him as he clutches her, teeth clashing, but that doesn't change the truth of it. He can hold her as tightly as he wants, but they both know she has always been smoke in his hands.

“I would give you anything,” he says against her mouth, pressed together like hands in prayer. She feels his breath stutter against her tongue, hitched with a sob he will not set free. “Name it. Palaces and jewels, the moon, a temple built in your name, the heads of every man who ever harmed you served on a silver platter. Name it and it’s yours. Just stay.”

Your heart. The tear slides down her cheek unbidden, and he kisses it away as he has done a thousand times before. She catches his lips with her own and kisses him again, fingers tangled in tendrils of his hair, still rough with saltwater no matter how many times he washes it. Your heart, your hand, a life with you away from this Saints-forsaken country.

She’ll stay. She will, because Anya is a soldier, and though she no longer has any loyalty to Ravka, she still believes in him. And there is no pain in the world that could hurt more than abandoning him now, no matter how much she wishes she could.

“Anything.” His voice, barely a whisper, a plea to those forgotten saints who have never seen fit to bestow a miracle upon them. “Anything, my darling.”

He sinks to his knees before her, presses his forehead to her stomach. She leans and kisses the crown of his scalp, lingering a moment to breathe in the salt and sea of him. Ravka will never know how lucky it is to have a prince so loyal. She doesn’t know what they’d done to earn such devotion.

“I know.” Despite the tears, her voice is deceptively still. Your heart. But he had already sworn it to his country, long before he ever loved her. “I want the same as you, Nikolai; peace and prosperity for Ravka.”

He snorts against her stomach. His arms wrap tightly around her middle. “Liar.”

“Always.” Pushing him away would not be the worst torture she has endured, but she worries it will scar her far longer than any blade could.

#nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai lantsov fanfiction #nikolai lantsov fanfic #nikolai lantsov oc #grishaverse fanfic #shadow and bone fanfic #shadow and bone oc #six of crows fanfic #* fic: gold rush.#* chapter update.

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littleleelee · 4 months

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New years kiss

Bro why the fuck aint there ANY for mihawks so far- im pissed.

so I'll do it for yall xd i have sum drafts for other characters, but i have shit to do so u get mihawk for now.

this is also kinda my first actual fic.. please spare me (┬┬﹏┬┬)

tw: Alcohol consumption (wine, ofc), Kissing (also ofc......) Sappy somewhat? overstimulated reader! *Loud sounds*, major fluff n cuddles bc ya buds touch starved, but also angsty? Gn reader ~being lover, dearest, partner, S/O, reader, and You/your

Word count: 1370! Damn-

It had been... a year, for the Dracule's. Mostly with the formation of The Cross Guild. When the warlords where disbanded, Mihawk had considered leaving his lover at a completely different island somewhere, to keep them away from what problems the Guild could bring them. However convincingly, reader got to tag along Mihawks side. Reader reminded Mihawk of his vows to his S/O,

"Through water and blood, I vow that I shall do whatever it takes, to keep you by my side. Even if the world truly turns upside down, you are not leaving my side".

Reader wasn't entirely expecting... buggy of all people. Reader preferred to stay away from buggy at all costs if Mihawk wasn't around (which mihawk greatly used as an excuse when he could). The both of them agreed to try and stay away from the... rowdier parts of the Big top ship. Which sadly was everywhere. The year was coming to an end and every breathing thing on the ship was screaming. Mihawk and reader had settled in the not small, but decent sized room they were given when they had arrived. Mihawk was enjoying a vintage, he had already drunk half of his bottle without realizing, and when he did finally notice, his attention had flicked to his lover, who was laying net to him on their bed.

Mihawk thought you were asleep, however his Haki told him otherwise. You were most definitely not asleep as you looked. He couldn't decide whether to say something, or to gently touch you, till you said something. "I can feel you staring, you a-also haven't flipped a page; for a w-while." reader said, tone shaken an unfocused. Which was HIGHLY, unlike your character. Mihawk looked to his book, which was now on the nightstand then back to his lover next to him. Sighing, he placed the empty wine class on his nightstand, and turned over to place a gentle grasp at your hip.

You flinched, swiftly bringing your hands to your ears before you stopped, Mihawk didn't take his hand away, instead turning you to your other side to meet him face to face. Your eyes were red from rubbing them, making them heavily glassy with unshed tears. "My Dearest, what has you so riled up like this?" his tone softer than normally, his face as flat as ever, tho you could notice the subtle differences that made his question genuine.

You meet his gaze has his hand moved from your hip, softly rubbing up and down your arm. Your voice shaky, "I-... it's the-" before you could finish a series of loud pops had echoed through the ship all the way to your shared room. You flinched once more, however much stronger than before. Your hands completely holding your ears down, with your knees now completely at your torso. Mihawks eyes slightly widened, his expression shifting slightly as a vein curved itself in his hairline, clenching his jaw he breathed through his noise and pulled himself closer to you wrapping himself tightly around you.

Reader first shifted at this, unsure. However, quickly they clung around their Husbands neck, burying their face into his pulse point. Their heavy breathing becoming more noticeable, and uneven. Mihawk brought a hand to caressing the back of their head, running his fingers through their hair. Shushing them, holding them as reader had done for him. He thought back thought the year, how many times reader had held and stayed by his side when he was drained or wasn't in the mood for anything. His S/O had always been there, but he couldn't recall a time where he was the one comforting reader, he could remember moments where they would seem off, however. Voice cracked, eyes red and puffy. These thoughts were interrupted by another loud crash, causing the reader in mihawks arms to startle.

"Hush.... my love, they won't last much longer." Mihawk stated as he held you tighter. You just nodded, still pressed against his neck. Mihawk honestly... had no clue how to approach you, he had so many questions he wanted to ask you. However, it didn't seem an appropriate time for such questions. he could hear a rough countdown happening outside...

"30.. 29.. 28!!"

Mihawks hand that was in your hair was now perched on your chin, tilting you too meet his golden stare as his other hand pulled you slightly away, you sniffled as you tilted your head in confusion.

"24,, 23,, 22"

"My dearest. I may not be... the most emotional human, I may not be as affectionate either. But it doesn't mean I don't know what they are, and I can tell somethings bothering you, and it has been for a while, am I correct?"

"20,, 19,, 18!!"

you stared at him, face red and puffy, you didn't know how to respond, yes, he was right, but what- why bring it up? Mihawk had just nodded, lips slightly tearing from their straight line, to a very small, unnoticeable to an untrained eye frown.

"16,, 15,, 14"

"For years, not even just this one, you have seen every bit of me. Even the parts I didn't entirely know I could express, you've been there for me, yet you have-not allowed me to aid you in your moments of distress, of need". God, his emphasis and tone on the last word. Youd think he was angry with you. or maybe even drunk...

"12,, 11, 10!!!"

Everything got so much louder. your unshed tears started to pour out, " And that isn't even the start. You act like everything is fine, never letting me help. You can't keep this up, not with what's going on around us now." he won't let up, his voice is starting to speed up. He doesn't do that.

"8,, 7,, 6"!!

"My fire and flood, love and dearest, I will not allow you to shed your tears alone, to carry this burden and mine on your shoulders alone. We vowed, to share these burdens together, had we not?" he's speaking even faster now, face lax, but concerned. You have been just staring at him, unable to form words at this. How easily, he could read you like his usual books.

"5, ,, 4 ,, , 3!!"

your tears were like rivers, pouring from your eyes, down your cheek to the sheets below you. Mihawks grip on you had tightened so significantly that you thought he was going to leave a bruise in the morning.

"If I could have just one wish, for another year with you, my dearest. Please. allow me to hold and sooth you, as you have me for years on end." His voice was cracked, he leaned in and stole whatever words you were going to say.

"2, , 1!!"

"HAPp-"

All the noise was drowned out. Mihawks lips pressed to yours, unlike the swift and soft ones he usually gave you. No, this one was different. As his tounge prodded at your lower lip, the kiss developed into a passionate, deep, loving one. The conjoining of lips locking was so different than what you were used too, but you didn't care. you craved love like this for so long, your not letting this go so fast.

Mihawk finally lets reader and him breath, placing his forehead against his lovers. "i-im sorry..." reader squeaked out, again... again... and again. Mihawk pulled them back against his chest. but they wouldn't stop saying it. Sorry, sorry, S o r r y. Why was his dearest sorry? "You have done nothing wrong, love;" he assures the babbling wreck in his neck. "; but please... can you promise me, you'll let me closer? let me help... when I can." he pleads with his reader.

Reader doesn't let up, they refuse to take their face out of mihawks neck, arms tightly around his torso. "I. c-can't promise, bu-ut I can Try." That was more than enough for Mihawk, he would have to plan accordingly for situations in the morning. but for now....

He and his dearest reader deserved some rest tonight. For Tomorrow was the start of a new day, a new year. one of unknown pain. So tonight, while they can, they enjoy the peace they do have.

~Fin~

YAHHHOOOOOOO my damn its 3am currently- i just had to get this out xd i hope it suffices as a good fic- ive never written one b4 so im just babbling qwp Headers found on google, thank you so much for reading <3

if there are any pronoun mistakes lmk.. im pretty sure there aint tho..

#mihawk x reader #dracule mihawk x reader #one piece x reader #gn reader

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daisymylove · 1 year

Text

I sincerely don't know if Im alone on this one, so I want to know what yall think. Again, I may get some heat for this, but it’s my honest opinion.

Something I noticed in my reread is that I grew a slight dislike for lucie in chot, and as someone who had always previously rooted for her, I’m currently annoyed at myself.The thing is, Lucie IS a very privileged and sheltered girl.She was born into a wealthy, loving family and, because of her apparent “normalcy”, never suffered the brunt of the shadowhunter prejudice like Tessa and James.

None of this is a problem in itself, but my point here is that there were always other people protecting, thinking and worrying for her, so I think not only she never realized how precarious her family’s position actually was, but also has no true understanding of consequences and how the “real world” works.She knew in some level that what she was doing regarding jesse was dangerous, but was never truly afraid of repercussions, bc unconsciously she knows there will be someone to catch her . And while I do like to see a character become aware of its own privileges along the narrative, there’s no growing here.She finished the book without ever realizing it, because everything was just SO easy and convenient, and that bothers me greatly.

In all fairness, how could she? she does whatever she wants with no consequences.

I feel so conflicted bc while I actually cheered when she brought jesse back in choi, and always shipped them, I find the outcome of her actions to be low-key infuriating.Lucie wasn’t willing to give Jesse up, but also never seriously considered giving up her comfortable life to start over with him somewhere.That ludicrous and set to fail jeremy blackthorn plan wasn’t even her idea, it was the people around her finding a way to fix her “mistakes” to save all of their asses from jail.

Lucie could’ve had her marks stripped, her father could’ve lost the institute, it could’ve costed Tessa’s life.Those guys had been waiting 25 years for the slightest opportunity to pounce on her, does anyone seriously believe they wouldn’t all automatically think the warlock mother was involved? How come there was some major necromancy going on under her roof and she had no idea? we know she didnt, but still All of this was severely downplayed and there was little to no conflict regarding it, and anyone can correct me if im wrong, but none of that ever dawned on lucie.She never fully thought about how her family would be implicated, and nobody brought that up to her.Zero confict just chill, I guess this is our life now .Dont get me wrong, I dont want that shitstorm to actually happen,I just wanted her to become AWARE of it

she literally brought home this complete stranger to them all (we know jesse, the characters dont) that was 8 years her senior (it doesnt matter his body was frozen for 7 years, mentally jesse is 24), Tatiana’s son, and had been dead up until last tuesday, but nobody save perhaps jessamine, and god it pains me to agree with jessamine had a problem with that.Instant acceptance, no resistance, no objections at all.All it would take for that lie to crumble would be ONE trial by the sword at any point of their lives and everybody was as chill as chicken joe from surfs up

Her fight with Cordelia pissed me off too. Lucie meddled on something she had no right and no knowledge of,and demanded things of Cordelia without even being willing to hear her out. ”oh the poor thing is suffering so much bc of you, why can’t you just take him back?” GIRL, FOR ALL SHE KNOWS, UNTIL A WEEK AGO, HOME BOY WAS SWEARING UNDYING LOVE AND BURNING DOWN MANORS FOR GRACE BLACKTHORN.

WE know poor james was ensorcelled and fighting it, but what was cordelia supposed to think of it? How dare she assume that Cordelia “took advantage of James going to Cornwal to run away with matthew”?

The demon of secrets in edom scene was plain ridiculous.”yo I had a childhood crush on your brother, sorry for never telling you, I was embarrassed” is not a big deal.The fact that they needed demonic intervention for THAT so late in the book baffles me

While I do think most characters were severely nerfed on this book and behaved ooc on several occasions (swear to god I have some mild ptsd from all the times cordelia ran and did unhinged things) , my conclusion about Lucie’s arc is that she took her good life for granted, endangered her entire family, didnt grow from the experience, but still got everything she wanted with no consequences or sacrifices.She lost a cousin along the way, but who cares about that guy? what was his name again? Its my understanding that Lucie never even faced a trial.Thats unrealistic and bad writing, if you ask me.When I think it over, the word that comes to me is...spoiled.

And dont get me started on the fact that she found out Malcom was planning on doing full blown necromancy and didnt do anything about it.How that had no repercussions AT ALL still blows my mind.

The worst part for me is that I genuinely believe Lucie deserved better you know?

If lucie and cordelia hadnt been allowed to become parabatai, and jesse had received some other minor yet life changing punishment, and we had seen a trial scene I would’ve been satisfied, because at least it wouldn’t have been nothing.

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tapiocasaturn404 · 3 months

Text

⇢ ˗ˏˋ Relationship to other members࿐ ྂ 🍓ɞ

⤷ Effy and Bang Chan

SHIP NAME: Cheffy

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: Lizzie☕(Mom)

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: Chris🦘(Dad)

Effy and Chan know each other since their trainee days. They have danced together prior and also produced songs. Chan thinks that she has immense talent and fought for her to be the new 9th member of Stray Kids.

Effy and Bang Chan take on the roles of organizers and schedulers for the group. Because of that, they get called "Mom and Dad" by the other members.

They work seamlessly together, balancing each other's strengths to ensure the group functions smoothly.

He fully supports her in the decision to study alongside being an idol. Went to visit universities with her and they looked together at possible courses she could master in.

Very proud producer Chan when she told him she wants to major in music and science (to incorporate it into their production).

Effy becomes a source of comfort for Bang Chan, especially when he overworks himself. She does not scold him for staying too long at the studio or forgetting to eat, instead she will just stop by and bring his favourite food to eat with him. Will give him shoulder rubs and encourage him when he feels low. He is so so grateful to have her.

When Chan notices that Effy is stressed, he plans a day off for her and they spend it outside the dorm or the entertaiment. He also gives her extra breaks where they sit down and talk about what stresses her and how they can change that.

Lizzie often spends the night with him (and 3Racha) in the studio producing songs, especially when its shortly before a come back.

Effy tends to zone out when she is too tired and Chan is showing her something

"Sweetheart, Pay attention to me. Should we add that 808 or not?"

Chan affectionately calls Effy "sweethart."

Effy playfully calls Chan "oppa" .

Like any close relationship, they have occasional disagreements, often related to group decisions or creative choices.

However, even when they fight, they quickly make up afterwards.

Chan shows up at Effys room with her favourite snack or Effy just finishes all of Chans paperwork and hands it to him.

"Hey. Here is your paperwork. Finished. I am sorry for how I behaved earlier today Chris"

He will smile at her, accepting the apology and pull her close to his chest.

"It´s okay sweetheart. I already forgot"

Effy and Chan have a collaborative playlist. It become the soundtrack of their shared moments, from late night drives and road trips to discussions about music.

Everyone says Chan gives the best hugs and to be honest Effy just can´t get enough of them.

Stays go crazy when Chris hugs Lizzie from behind.

Chan may give Effy a gentle forehead kiss when she is sleepy and falls asleep next to him when in the stuido or when they are spending their evening on the couch.

Carries her to bed and tucks her in.

Or gives her a quick kiss on the cheek when he is leaving to the studio and is in a rush.

"Oppa, taking care of you is not worrying too much. You're the best leader, but you're human too. Get some rest!"

"Alright, alright, "Mom". I'll take a break, but only because you said so."

⤷ Effy and Lee Know

SHIP NAME: Minlee

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: Menace 🙄

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: Bully🤦🏻‍♀️

Minho was initially skeptical about having a girl join the group, especially given the close-knit brotherhood they had. He was strict and critical during Effy's early dance training, pushing her to prove herself.

"No, you´re doing that wrong. Aish, can´t you do anything right?"

Over time, Minho witnessed Effy's dedication and fast learning. He gained respect for her work ethic and talent, realizing that gender had no bearing on her ability to contribute to the group.

Despite their initial clashes, Minho and Effy developed a unique dynamic filled with bantering, teasing and (playful) bullying.

Effy teaches him english, since he is not as good at it. She teaches him british slang words and expressions, leaving the other members confused when they start talking in english.

"Hey Felix, uh, fancy a cuppa?"

Felix: *Confused in Australian*

The duo often goes shopping together, exchanging fashion tips and opinions. They also share a love for watching shows and not being able to go to sleep without at least clicking "Next" five times in a row.

Has made it his mission to disturb her while she studies. Whether through annoying questions or things on his phone that he shows her. At some point Effy becomes unfocused and annoyed by him and gets upset. He just grins because he has achieved his goal and leaves.

"Lino, can you just stop?! I´m seriously trying to concentrate!"

"What, I didn´t do anything kitten"

Minho calls Effy "kitten" as suggested by Stay (Stay = 👀). He said it once to her out of fun and Stays noticed that it make her blush. It became a constant nickname, adding a touch of sweetness to their dynamic.

Whenever Effy shows him affection through hugs or cuddles, he acts as if he is disgusted.

“If you're waiting for me to care, I hope you brought something to eat, 'cause it's gonna be a really long time“.

"Clingy, much huh?“.

However, when no one looks, Minho returns it. Often it is the way he rests his hand on her knee when they are sitting next to each other or his hand being on her lower back when walking. However not even he can resist pulling her into a bone crushing hug sometimes.

"Ah, let's go shopping this weekend. I need to make sure you don't ruin our group's image with questionable fashion choices"

"Whatever. But yeah, lets go shopping"

⤷ Effy and Changbin

SHIP NAME: Changbeth

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: Pilates Princess👑

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: Gym Bro 🏅

Changbin was intrigued but slightly skeptical when Effy joined Stray Kids. He quickly noticed her determination and work ethic, especially in maintaining her fitness routine.

They got along quickly when they noticed that they go to the same gym. He works out and she does Pilates.

Effy admires Changbin's rap skills and initially took his critiques as an opportunity to learn and grow. She always tries to rap his parts but fails horribly. He teaches her how to do it right.

Effy likes to teach Changbin girl group dances when they have time between schedules. Whenever she learned a new dance from Itzy or Twice, she seeks him as her dance partner.

Changbin shows her how to play pool.

Simply steals all her books and revision sheets when he is of the opinion that she studies too much. Does not listen to her complaints

"But I have an exam next week!"

"You need breaks too, princess"

Princess and princess protector duo!!

He protects her at all costs. Shields her whenever they are walking through a crowd or at fansigns. Carries her when it started to rain suddenly and she is wearing heels or nice shoes. Will threaten everyone that that makes her feel uncomfortable.

If she gets hurt while working out he immediately worries.

“Ouch, that looked like it hurts. You okay, princess?“

“I’m okay, it’s just a scratch Binnie“

Effy becomes a confidante for Changbin, and he becomes a reliable pillar of support for her. Their dynamic evolves into a sibling-like relationship, where they can share their concerns, dreams, and daily experiences without judgment.

Changbin becomes Effy's personal pillow. No matter if it is while watching a movie or during a break after dancing. His broad shoulders become a comfortable resting spot for her.

"Oh, princess said you liked sour gummies , so I bought this for you"

“Binnie I’m so unmotivated today, can we go to the gym together?“ “Sure princess“

⤷ Effy and Hyunjin

SHIP NAME: Lizjin

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: Muse 💫

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: Artist🎨

Effy appreciates Hyunjin's artistic talents and sees him as the "Artist" who brings her visions to life.

Her presence sparks his artistic imagination.

Hyunjin appreciates Effy's input on his drawings and welcomes her suggestions. He does not like input from everyone, but he feels like she always has the best ideas.

Will paint together and switch canvas every ten minutes. It ends in a disaster because Effy has no idea how to paint and creates the most weirldy looking faces.

"Ahh what have you done, you have disfigured him!"

"Well, no, it's just all a matter of interpretation-"

Hyunjin tries to teach her basic drawing anatomy but its hopeless.

They are the aesthetic duo!!

Productive time together is so important to them. Lizzie drags him with her to her unis library so she can study in peace (away from the boys in the dorm) and he sketches in the mean time/reads books about famous painters.

Taking pretty pictures while going on coffee or museum/art gallery dates together.

Effy and Hyunjin indulge in skincare routines together, sharing tips and trying out new products. It's a relaxing time for them to unwind. They do face masks when they go live and gossip about the newest scandals on the internet or about shows/movies they have watched.

Effy sometimes takes on the role of Hyunjin's hairstylist, experimenting with different hair colors and hairstyles (She gets scolded by the stylists the next day because the makeover did not fit into the look schedule).

Play fighting and tickling are common occurrences between them, adding a light-hearted and playful element to their relationship.

Effy comes to him when she feels drained and exhausted.

Rather than skinship, Hyunjin mostly offers words of encouragement, reminding Effy of her strengths and accomplishments. He emphasizes that struggles are a natural part of life and reassures her that he's there to support her through any challenges.

Hyunjin often affectionately pats Effy's head, especially when he wants to reassure or congratulate her.

Hyunjin is Effys dramatic counterpart.

Will whine and complain when she does not have time for him because she is busy with her schedule.

"But Muse, you promiseeedd"

Lizzie will buy him art supplies as reparation which leaves him satisfied.

Steals his hoodies and shirts. When Stays notice it, she just huffs and says something like

"He is the ambassador of Versace, a few shirts less wont hurt him"

"I brought you coffee!"

"Oh, good. Is it americano?"

"Yeah, Hyune. Otherwise you would send me back"

"Wanna go on a coffee date today, my Muse? I need some inspiration. Lets go to the new little Cafe that opened next to the company!"

"Yeah and after that we can visit the art gallery!"

⤷ Effy and Jisung

SHIP NAME: Jiffy

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: Owl 🦉

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: Quokka🦦

British duo and chaotic duo

He is her certified british brother and keeps teaching him how to improve his accent to sound even more british.

"Yeah, but, you have to say it like that. Ah mate im so knackered"

Jisung and Effy often find themselves in humorous and mischievous situations. Jisung appreciates Effy's quick thinking and resourcefulness when they get into trouble.

Calls her Jagi/Jagiya

Calls him Hannie or Ji

Effy holds her "mom privilege" to bail Jisung out of trouble, especially when he's in hot water with Bang Chan. Jisung playfully complains but secretly relies on Effy's rescue missions.

“Uhhh Jagi, we have a problem“

“No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps getting into one“

Jisung and Effy have established anime marathon nights, where they binge-watch their favorite series together. The shared enthusiasm for the characters and storylines becomes a bonding experience.

Effy and Jisung's love for horror movies leads to amusing reactions. Jisung, pretending to be brave, ends up jumping at the scary scenes, and Effy can't help but tease him mercilessly.

"Who is the brave one now, huh?“

Will eventually scare him at night.

Whenever Effy is sad Jisung does his Doraemon voice impression. She always has to laugh because she thinks it is so cute and it maker her sadness dissappear in seconds.

Effy bakes cheescake for them to eat it while watching movies. She often tries different variations, e.g. strawberry cheescakes and makes Han try it.

They go on winter strolls together when snow fell. Almost always building a snow man or having a snow ball fight, which ends up into them wrestling each other in the snow.

They would come home totaly frozen and shivering. When they changed they quickly cuddle up under a blanket on the couch to heat themselves up and start watching something on TV while drinking hot chocolate.

Effy likes to show her affection to Jisung thrugh squishing his cheeks together or hugging him.

He, too, shows his affection through skinship. He plays with her hair when she is nervous to calm her down.

Tries new hairstyles on her when she is studying. Braids her hair, decorates it with little colorfull hair clips or just plays with it to help her stay focused.

“Jagi your hair is so soft“

Rubs her back when she needs encouragement. Holds her hand when they go through crowds.

“Hold on tight so we don’t get lost, okay Jagi?“

"Mom, Chan's giving me that 'disappointed dad' look again. Any chance you could save me from another lecture?"

"Ahh, Ji, you're lucky to have me. But seriously, what did you do this time?!?!"

⤷ Effy and Felix

SHIP NAME: Efflix

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: My rainy day ☔

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: My sunshine ☀️

When they first met, they instantly clicked. Felix feels an instant connection with Effy

Like sunshine breaking through the clouds

He cherishes the warmth and positivity she brings into his life.

Says she is like a rainy summer day

In the beginning, Felix found Korean to be a challenging language to grasp. Effy had the same problem.

They talk most of the time in english because it just became a habit.

They enjoy baking together. Most of the time, they are making Felix famous brownies.

They try other recipes too like pastries or cakes.

Felix tries introducing Lizzie to of League of Legends and Genshin Impact.

He explaines the intricate mechanics, strategies, and lore behind these games.

However Effy enjoys more quiet games like Minecraft and Animal Crossing.

They decided to compromise and make gaming "date" nights.

Felix patiently taught Lizzie the basics of League of Legends, emphasizing teamwork and strategy.

On the flip side, Lizzie forced the charm of Animal Crossing onto Felix, trying to teach him how to farm Tarantulas and Scorpions to sell.

Whenever Felix feels sad or everything just gets overwhelming, he comes to Lizzie.

Will probably silently just hug her and burst out into tears.

Lizzie does not want to pressure him into talking or anything, so she just comforts him.

"Take your time, Lixie. It is okay, I’m here"

There are nights when Effy finds herself tossing and turning, unable to find the solace of sleep.

Knowing she can always turn to Felix, Effy often quietly slips into his room.

Might just state a simple "Can't sleep," and Felix responds with a comforting and sleepy smile.

Will scoot over immediately for her to slip under the blanket and gently rubs her back or soothingly strokes her hair.

Holds her in his arms for the whole night.

Warms her up. Sometimes he sings to her quietly if she can’t fall asleep again.

"Why cant you sleep honey, hm? Tell me about it“

“Is this calming you down? Should I stop?“

Their "love language" is skinship.

Their close-knit relationship often sparks rumors among Stays, constanly speculating if they are dating or not.

Lizzie quickly debunks any dating rumors that circulate. She clarifies that their affectionate interactions stem from a deep friendship and a shared understanding.

Effy finds comfort and security in physical contact. She can count herself happy that Felix is the same.

Sends her sweet messages throughout the day

"Hey honey. I hope you have a great day! I baked brownies and saved some for you. Did you eat enough today?"

Scolds Felix because he spends too much time on TikTok. He is like one of those 12 year old boys.

He forces her to do TikToks with him and spams her with videos that are funny (in his opinion).

"Yah, Yongbok stop sending me that unfunny TikToks I beg you"

"Only if you promise we can play Genshin tonight, pleaseeee"

⤷ Effy and Seungmin

SHIP NAME: Seungbeth

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: Ms. Sensitive ✨

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: Meanie 🤚🏻

Was the first one she met (besides Chan). She couldn’t find their record studio and asked him for the way. He looked at her weirdly and asked what she want to do there. She explained that she is joining the group. Somehow he did not get the memo that there will be a new 9th member and had to call Chris to confirm.

Seungmin is meanie number two!! Teases Effy in a different way than Minho but certainly knows how to push her buttons (But it's all in good fun).

At first Lizzie thought he was serious about it, but quickly noticed that he did not mean it in a bad way at all. Effy decided to turn the tables and engage in some teasing of her own.

“I‘m too old to keep up with this shit“

“Then die, Grandpa“

Seungmin helps Effy with singing and training her voice. When she first joined Stray Kids, they spent hours and hours in the recording room practicing. He teached her different techniques and always was patient with her. From time to time she manages to sing his high notes, making him proud.

Effy and Seungmin are in charge of making breakfast at the dorm. Whether they’re making pancakes, eggs, or avocado toast, the kitchen is always filled with laughter and the delicious aroma of breakfast.

Earning praise from the other members for it like

"Ahh its sooo delicious, you’re treating us so well!“

While Effy takes charge of the creativity in the kitchen, Seungmin ensures everything is spotless afterwards. He is the most clean member and it shows. Effy might experiment with new recipes, and Seungmin is there to assist.

Seungmin always tries to get Effy to like baseball. Seungmin takes the time to explain the rules, strategies, and the excitement of the game to Effy. However, most of the times she will just sit there confused and proceed to ask him what they are doing.

“Huh? Why is he running now, I thought he was supposed to hit the ball!“

When Lizzie is studying, Seungmin might make some snippy remarks about it.

“Why are you even trying? Its not like you have a brain“

“Were you dropped on your head as a child? Even a second grader could understand it!“

But will bring her snacks, water, a blanket or coffee without being asked and make not a comment about it. Keeps Effy energized and comfortable while studying. It's his way of showing car.

Seungmin, while not as openly affectionate as some of the other members, has his own subtle and caring ways of showing how much he adores he.

Occasionally holds Effy by the waist when they are on stage/she is singing and gets a little anxious about messing up.

Recognizing when Effy is stressed or tense, Seungmin gives her gentle shoulder rubs.

“Remember when I asked for your opinion? Me neither.“

“You have your entire life to be a jerk. Why not take today off?“

⤷ Effy and I.N.

SHIP NAME: Effyin

HAS HER SAVED IN HIS PHONE AS: Maknae Noona 🐞

HAS HIM SAVED IN HER PHONE AS: Desert Fox🦊🌵

When Effy first joined Stray Kids, there were several cultural differences and the new environment posed a challenge for her to fully acclimate to the group.

It was Jeongin, the youngest member who took it upon himself to ensure Effy felt welcomed and comfortable.

He said that in some way she also was a Maknae, even if she is older than him.

"I´ll just call you Maknae Noona, how does that sound?"

Jeongin became her unofficial orientation guide. He showed her around the dorm, introduced her to the members, and explained the group's dynamics.

Jeongin organized team-building activities within the group.

Whether it was playing games or going out.

These activities helped Effy integrate.

Lizzie and Jeongin have a mother-son relationship.

When Effy and Chris are fighting, he sends messages to the groupchat like

"Attention! Stay away from the dorm, Mom and Dad are fighting again!"

Jeongin finds comfort in confiding in Effy about his concerns and experiences. Whether it's about the pressures of being the maknae or personal matters, Effy becomes a trusted confidante.

"Innie, your dancing has improved so much. You have nothing to worry about okay?"

Both being music enthusiasts, Effy and Jeongin enjoy exploring record shops together, discovering new albums and sharing their favorite tracks.

Everywhere IN goes, a series of trips and stumbles follow him.

Effy has become a pro at predicting when he's about to take a tumble and subtly offers a helping hand.

"You´re more zombie than human the way you run against everything"

Effy and Jeongin often indulge in late-night mukbang sessions on vlive, trying out various snacks and sharing their favorites.

Jeongin tends to get excited about trying spicy foods, and Effy is always there with a glass of milk to save the day when he underestimates the heat.

"Ahhh Noona you were right it´s too hot it´s too hot!!!"

Thinks Effy is cute when she is angry and teases her with it.

"You´re cute when youre angry"

"Ohh so you think I´m cute when I´m angry? Well get ready because I´m about to be gorgeous!"

IN is the one who wakes up first in the dorm and obviously needs to disturb Effys sleep.

Will go to her room and play loud music until she wakes up.

If that does not work, he will start jumping on her bed.

"Innie I swear! Go away! Let me sleep in peace"

Eventually will lay down with her, softly talk and caress her face while she is half asleep.

"What did you dream last night? I had a dream where I was floating in a sea of bubble tea!"

"Noona, I heard there's a new escape room in town. Let's give it a try! Pleaseee"

"We'll escape in record time!"

#stray kids 9th member #stray kids #stray kids scenarios #skz #changbin #seungmin #lee know #han jisung #bang chan #stray kids x reader #stray kids imagines #skz 9th member #jeongin #hyunjin #stray kids au #skz au #stray kids fanfic

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jarofstyles · 11 months

Text

Reaper 8

Reaper is a dark story with dark and mature subject matter. 18+ NSFW

another lovely update for you, a little more background, a little more drama

Check out our Patreon for early access and exclusive writing!

warnings: reaper's explicit rage, kinda fluffy tbh, age gap talks, she calls him daddy once, smut

wc: 12.5k

-------------------

The stillness of the morning was something Harry had grown to love. Growing up in London, he was used to the sound of sirens and raindrops against the window panes of his council flat. It was opposite to the serenity of his desert oasis. Sure the heat took some getting used to at first, but there was nowhere in the world he’d rather be.

When his mum shipped him off to his aunt’s house in the States at 13, he thought he’d never forgive her for taking away everything he knew. He was left to fend for himself out here, but it seems the fresh start was a blessing in disguise. A blessing that saved his miserable, twisted life.

Harry tried his best not to move as he shifted awake, not wanting to wake the sweet sleeping Bunny in his arms. She was snuggled so comfortably against his chest, arms, and legs clinging to him. The longer she slept the more time she spent away from this reality where she didn’t feel entirely safe. Harry wasn’t sure how he slept at night knowing that.

His lips brushed her forehead as she shifted in her sleep, a sweet little sigh leaving her swollen lips as she sunk further into his warmth. His throat tightened as he realized just how comfortable she was with him.

He still felt the guilt coursing through him. The fact he had made himself stay far, far away from her and pushed her away because he had been worried about caving and giving into this exact want? To the point where she probably didn’t feel comfortable enough to tell him someone was bothering her? It stung. His intentions in staying a respectable distance had been good but he had hurt her in the long run.

She had always been a favorite of his, long before the feelings had changed and things had shifted to a romantic gaze. It was more so on her side admittedly at first, but at age 19 when she had come back from her second year of college and he had seen her again, seen the woman she had become instead of sweet little Bunny who drew with chalk and showed him the cupcakes she decorated? It had spooked him entirely and he had taken major steps back. He knew it had hurt her back then and he had tried to keep the big brother type of thing but it was never like that for her.

For her, she saw him as a friend. Someone she looked up to and loved. And then it was more. He knew she had a little crush but never imagined it had actually flourished into the feelings she was expressing now.

He was being selfish now. Hogging her and indulging in the fantasy of laying in bed with her like she was his girlfriend. Pressing a few kisses to the crown of her head as her nude back was stroked by his hand, her peaceful expression reminding him exactly why he needed to be careful.

Each and every day he felt the anger in him brew. The anger towards himself and this stalker, this man who thought he had any claim in the woman he wanted to keep.

Whilst Harry was deep in thought Bunny had long since woken up, far too busy enjoying the tenderness he was offering her. She at first thought it was reserved for special occasions, during their most intimate moments. Though once it came, it never faded. He was tender even when it wasn’t necessary and to her, that meant far more.

Harry noticed a shift in her breathing but chose to keep quiet. He really shouldn’t indulge like this.

It was too late. It’s been too late.

“You trying to trick me, bun?” Harry rasped, breaking through the silence a few moments later. He placed another gentle kiss on her forehead, resting his cheek against the top of her head. “You must be tired, why don’t you sleep a little more?” His words were met immediately with a shake of her head.

“Don’t wanna,” Y/N mumbled against his chest, “Not when you’re awake.” Bunny knew how cheesy it sounded. She couldn’t help how she felt. Her body pushed forward against his, asking him to lay flat on his back so she could climb to lay on top of him.

“What do you wanna do today?” She asked, letting out a tiny yawn before resting her cheek back against his chest. “Cause I’m guessing I’m not going to class.”

His smile could be felt on her head as she melted into him. It wasn’t fair. It really wasn’t. Harry made her heart beat so hard and her stomach clench with the giddy swirls and he always seemed so… calm. Collected. Even when he was being sweet. She wished sometimes she had more control over her reactions with him because it was almost embarrassing.

“Mm.. as much as I want to keep you locked in here and in this bed?” He laid back and placed his arm back around her, fingers tangling with the ends of her hair. “I think I should let you go back. It isn’t… I don’t want him to think he’s won. That he’s backing you into a corner. Y’know?” He felt her nod against his chest.

“Yeah. I’m just getting spoiled spending the days with you.” Her tired voice made him want to pull her up for a kiss, but she was seemingly comfortable so he settled on a squeeze to her hip.

“Me too, baby. Me too.” The pet name had slipped out again, not in the context of sex, and it had her reeling. Hearing him call her such soft things had her feeling giddy.

“So I can go to classes? Are… you’re gonna be sitting out there?” She hoped he would. Harry made her feel the safest she had ever felt in her life.

“Yeah. And Kid is going to go inside with you. I talked to Viper about it and he’s a good one. A little younger than you, but he’s never pulled any bullshit.”

“Kid huh?” She giggled, “No, I shouldn’t judge based on the nickname. I’m sure he’s dangerous.” Y/N said more to herself than to Harry. She let her eyes fall closed again with a sigh, focusing in on Harry’s heartbeat to ground her. It had quickly become one of her favorite things to do.

“Okay, so that means I have to get up like…. Now.” She whined towards the end of the sentence, expressing clear distress on her face. She didn’t want to get up, but she’d do it. Y/N really did love going to her classes. Turning her head, she pressed a few kisses to his chest with a sweet hum. “Not yet though.”

Their morning kiss was far more important at the moment.

The two of them had felt undeniably closer after last night. Feelings on high, there were no hesitations anymore. At least not from Y/N. If she didn’t think it’d freak him out she would have told him she loved him by now.

“I’m going to shower. Do NOT,” She pressed a finger to his nose, “because I will give in and I will be late and please don’t make it hard for me.” Bunny pouted, pecking his lips a few more times before lifting herself out of bed.

“I was about to come with you, so you’re very lucky you gave me that warning.” He said with a snicker, sitting up and stretching as he watched her walk to the bathroom and shut the door.

God damn. He was in so much fucking trouble with her. He could see himself having this view every single morning, except following her inside the bathroom and holding her there for quite a while. Making her late.

One of the good things about the reputation of the club was that people didn’t fuck with its members or their women. Their lovers. Whatever. They had privileges and connections and weren’t afraid to get their hands dirty. Harry was happy that would extend to Y/N.

The black tee shirt was lazily thrown on his shirtless form, going to his dresser and putting his rings back on the allotted finger.

He hoped that she would be out of the shower soon. She really would be late if she didn’t hurry.

—————————

“Can you grab me a banana or something please!” Y/N called to him as she hurriedly tugged on some jeans. Although Harry did make a face at the thought of her not having a proper meal in her belly, he knew they didn’t have time for a real breakfast.

“I have a break at 12, I’ll come out and bring you some of whatever we make, okay? I don’t want you to be hungry waiting for me either.” It was a perk of culinary school, there was always something to eat if you were hungry. Of course, she wanted to make sure he had something in his system to keep him alert.

“I’m ready, just need to put on my shoes.” Bunny checked the clock, 8:32 am. Class started at 9. “Okay, we need to go!” She pulled her tote bag over her shoulder, opening the door only to be met with a sinister surprise.

A bag from the shop they were at yesterday.

“Harry,” Y/N's voice did nothing to hide her shock. She knew for a fact he had not put it there, hell, how could anyone have put it there?

Harry knew by her voice that something was wrong. His alarms hackled, grabbing his gun and unlocking the safety, shoving her away from the door and raising the gun.

There was no one there but a familiar shopping bag, the hair on the back of his neck standing up as he pushed Bunny back and kicked the bag. Just in case something was explosive, he covered the door frame with his body but there were no movement- only fabric spilling out of the bag.

He looked up at her with furrowed brows, deciding it was safe to grab the bag and bring it inside. There were no good moves at this point. No one ordered anything here and the sick feeling in his stomach had him aware of just who this was from.

“Bunny, back up.” He ordered, taking the bag and opening it up to see the pink fabric was… an older worn pair of panties? With a white piece of paper attached to it with scratchy writing.

“Did you forget my invite? I thought we were going to have fun together, but it seems you’re too busy being a whore for that scum. I can hear you right now. He’s not a good man, Y/N. I will get rid of him for you.”

For once, Harry felt blindsided.

How could this happen? He brought her here because it was secure and safe. He had made sure of that when he moved in. Someone was getting fired today if not murdered. He needed to control himself, he couldn’t act on these feelings now. His priority was Bunny.

“We are going now.” Harry spoke calmly, locking his apartment though at this point, he might as well leave it open. Ridiculous that he even had to do this, had to fix this, had to think on his feet so much when she should be safe here. He didn’t want to bark orders at her, but he was livid. Anything could set him off right now and he didn’t have time for the rage.

Harry kept her close to his body as they made their way to his bike. The bag was still in his hand, he didn’t think it was something Y/N should see. Not yet anyway. He folded the bag in half and shoved it into the compartment under his seat. Everything was moving so fast, he didn’t realize he was barely saying a word to Y/N.

“Here.” He mumbled, helping her with the helmet as usual. “Hold on tight, bun.”

————————

“I need everyone to open their ears and listen very fucking closely— this fucking roach got into my building!” Harry could not hold back his anger anymore, not in the comfort of the clubhouse.

Everyone had heard his bike roar as they pulled into the lot. It was still early in the morning, they weren’t expecting anyone till at least midday. They knew it could only mean one thing.

Viper had been the first to greet them, immediately looking to Bunny to see how she was handling it. To his surprise, she seemed calm and relatively relaxed. It definitely hadn’t hit her yet.

“How?” Wiz asked with a raised brow. “You live at a pretty secure place.”

Harry shot him a look. “If I fucking knew, I’d have the thing dismembered by now.” His voice was a low growl. Harry’s whole body screamed danger, he was on edge and his stance was tight. “I’m not keeping her there when he could bypass the guard at the front. Which- I hope someone has a shovel ready because that one needs a shallow grave too, later.

Anyone who allowed this to happen would die. He could see the blood now. It would be the only thing that could make him feel better.

“How do you know it was him?” Viper tried to be reasonable, knowing that despite Harry being normally rational in those terms- he was paranoid when it came to Bunny. Anyone with eyes could see he cared for her.

“I have proof.” He yanked the bag out of his pocket and handed it to him. “That’s from a store we went to yesterday. The son of a bitch was following us. Don’t open that out here.” He warned. Anyone else seeing those panties would make him start screaming.

Viper’s brows flashed up when he saw the name of the shop on the bag. He’d bought his wife a few things from there before, this wasn’t a minor offense.

“I’m guessing it’s the underwear he took from her house the first time, it’s in there with another note.” Harry nodded towards the bag, “I’ll skin him alive. He thinks he can threaten me?” It’s that part of the note that really got to him. There was no doubt that he would be able to kill the fucker, but to have Bunny see it? To think she wasn’t safe with him? It’d be the death of him he was sure.

“You two are welcome to stay here in the meantime. You aren’t going back there anytime soon, little rabbit.” Viper turned to Bunny, he didn’t hesitate to offer them their guest room. It was Harry’s room at first anyway. “I’ll have Mia sort it out for you, Wiz? I think you and Reaper should head back there… bring Kid with you, he’s got a good eye. Get whatever you need for the week and bring it back here. You know she’s safe here.”

Bunny knew better than to comment, this wasn’t the time. Harry was rightfully fuming, he was not in the headspace to be there for her now and she knew that. In fact, this time she wasn’t as spacey— it’s as if she knew something would happen to taint the wonderful mood she’d been in. The awareness of having a full-time stalker had fully settled in.

Harry turned to her. He was trying, that was what mattered. She could see on his face he remembered last time, his solid body stalking up to her and taking her chin in his hand.

“I’m going to take care of it, Bunny.” He said quietly. His eyes still weren’t all there- she could tell his brain was still not really able to fully be there for her but the attempt was there. “M’gonna kill him.”

His lips covered hers roughly, kissing her hard. In front of all the brothers, it was very telling where they stood now. Harry wouldn’t just kiss anyone, his grip on her possessive as he let it linger on the only sweetness he could focus on.

“Text me what you need, yeah? I’ll grab your school shit. We’re taking a truck to grab some shit. Wiz will look at the security systems and we’ll install better ones later but… you’re safe here.” He thumbed over her cheek. “Viper will introduce you to Mia. I’ve got to go.”

“Be safe, okay?” Y/N wrapped her hand around his wrist, dragging her thumb over the back of his hand that was on her cheek. She leaned into his touch some more, turning her head to press a kiss to the palm of his hand. “I’ll see you later. I’m okay, I promise.” And she really was. She was surprising herself, though it was definitely just a trauma response. Thankfully, she had Viper here to help.

—————————

“Man, he’s a fucking nerd,” Wiz grumbled with annoyance as he searched through the footage, noticing how clean the time cuts had been. There was only a certain time frame it could have been if he’d heard them fucking. “It was still light outside— he’s got some balls I give him that.”

“I’ll feed them to Rover if he even thinks of coming back here again.” Harry spat, not in the mood for jokes. This creep was getting on Harry’s last nerve and he didn’t have many, to begin with.

“Look— you said you got back around 4, yeah? There is a cut from 4:38 to 5. Either he was here for a while or he’s trying to throw us off.” Wiz explained, wanting to see if he had forgotten any cameras.

“He has to be insane. Because there’s no way he knows of us… knows of Reaper’s reputation and is still choosing to go after his girl.” Kid said quietly, pushing his sunglasses up.

The man’s rage could be felt in the place, his body nearly vibrating with anger. Harry knew it was better to have left her there. He didn’t like how this situation was making him feel. It was worrying him a bit. Yes- he snapped many times, he was bloodthirsty and he killed people, he did it without a second thought if the conditions were right, the crime was bad enough. But this was slow burning. Edging. Boiling his rage more and more each day.

He hoped Bunny wasn’t there when he found the guy. No one would be able to stop him from killing him with his bare hands. Nothing could. He wouldn’t stop until he was sure the thing was dead.

“I mean… hacking into security cameras isn’t difficult for a novice once you’ve got access to the deck. But my question is… who let him into the security booth? Because there’s no way an amateur could do this from their own computer.” Wiz looked at him.

“When do your security switch shifts?” Kid piped up. “If he’s watching Bunny it’s possible that he’s been watching this place for a while and knows the shifts. He could have worked it to a way where he messed with a guard or became familiar with them.”

“Kid, how about you go down there and do some investigating.“ Harry would do it himself had he been in a calmer state of mind. Kid was younger and had a kind face, they wouldn’t think anything of it. At the minute Harry was packing Bunny’s essentials, trying to ground himself through the sound of Wiz clicking away on his laptop. He couldn’t trust himself to do anything else, not when he was so on edge.

“Gotcha!” Wiz smacked the desk with delight, zooming in on the one place he knew the guy wouldn’t think to look. “Parking garage cams, how I love you so!” Wiz sing songed, “Come here, both of you.” He stopped Kid in his tracks to the door.

The footage wasn’t the best quality, but it was obvious that someone had stopped to look in Harry’s car. The figure had a toolbox with him, a hat covering his head. Maintenance, a believable disguise.

“This fucker— He did the same thing with his hand when he checked Bunny’s car in the lot.” Wiz pulled up the footage side by side. The hand going up, the way his back hunched.

Harry was deadly silent as he watched, his hands gripping the tabletop so hard that his knuckles were white. The son of a bitch. He didn’t have enough degrading words for him.

There was unfiltered audacity from this motherfucker. He had no fear. None at all, and it made Harry so angry that he could spit. He could maim. He was going to ruin this man and wipe him off this earth. “I’ve never looked forward to ending a life so much in my lifetime.” He murmured quietly, letting the anger fester. It would fuel him later.

Wiz looked at Harry with concern. “Brother… I know it’s hard right now. We’re going to get him. We won’t let him get Bunny.”

“I know,” Harry said simply. “I’m going to track down this fucker the moment I get even a hint of a lead.” He turned and went back to their bedroom. Theirs. It really was at this point, with her stuff all over. Hair ties on his dresser and her makeup in his bathroom. Her slippers were next to his house shoes, her cardigan over his armchair in the corner. Her fake lashes on her nightstand that sometimes he got spooked by and thought were spiders. It made her crack up the time she had caught his jump. She had become a staple in his home and now it felt unsafe.

He hated this.

“I know you will. Without a doubt, we always do. Bunny is a special girl, she gets you, bro. Gotta make sure you keep yourself calm for her. When you do see him? Do what you do best, but right now… We gotta focus.” Wiz had seen Harry in far worse states, though he’d never heard him say he looked forward to killing someone.

Was this the Reaper in love? Even he was afraid to get in his way. The only thing letting Wiz know he was still sane and not too far gone was his tone of voice. He had never seen him so focused while feeling his rage. What spell had the little Bunny put on him?

Harry took a few deep breaths, Wiz was right. He knew he was, but Harry’s anger knew no bounds. He’d spent his whole life trying to control it, trying to find ways to release it. First, it was sex, then it was drugs, and now it was killing.

“Man, I need a fat fucking spliff.”

——————————

Bunny was in her own head, smiling softly at Mia as she chatted to her while they set up Harry’s old room at the clubhouse.

“So I had one of the guys run to Target to grab some fresh sheets and pillows for you guys. I don’t want you to sleep on the gross ones.” She wrinkled her nose. Her hand was going inside the drawers, wiping out the surfaces with disinfectant wipes. The clubhouse was raunchy and not suitable for couple living, but she was doing her best to help Bunny adjust.

She nodded. “Thank you, Mia. Really. I’m usually a lot more talkative, I promise. I’m just a little shaken up.” She felt bad she wasn’t meeting her at her best. It wasn’t personal and her fear was the girl thinks of her as rude or standoffish but she only really wanted Harry right now.

“Please.” She scoffed. “I didn’t mutter more than a yes or no for the first 2 months I was here. If anyone understands being overwhelmed... it’s me. It’s not something I’ve been through myself, your situation… but I know how scary it is to feel out of control of your life and that someone else is pulling the strings. You’re really lucky you’ve got Reaper.” Mia threw the last wipe in the trash bag.

“He’s scary, really, but he’s nice. He isn’t… he doesn’t harass women, he is the first one to put someone in line if they’re being disrespectful to a woman here. The guys here are decent to me but they still are a bit… insensitive at times.”

“Yeah, I can imagine.” Y/N let out a sad chuckle, knowing how difficult it must be to be surrounded by these men all the time. Her comment about Harry did warm her heart, she knew this fact about him, but to hear it confirmed by someone who had no motive was comforting.

“He um… he told me about you, that my brother and my dad were on the mission of helping you.” Bunny knew she didn’t have to say anything else, Mia would know exactly what she had been referencing. “I know you weren’t in the state to meet them properly before things all went to shit, but I’ve known Harry a long time. He’s always been a nice guy at heart.” It was still odd for her to call him Reaper. She didn’t think she ever could. “Don’t tell him I said that though!”

Mia let out a giggle at her last statement, taking a look around the room to see what she could do next.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” She offered a warm smile, “I heard you were a chef.” Mia enjoyed cooking, but the girls in the kitchen were far more skilled than she was. “You have to teach me!”

“I’d love to. Do you have stuff here?” She asked curiously. She was hungry. Her banana had been abandoned in her bag and she could go for some real food.

Shit. She had to email her professors, too.

“I think we should. I’ll go and check.” The knock at the door was Viper, his charming smile making Y/N feel a bit more at ease.

“Delivery.” He opened the door with the three target bags overstuffed, Y/N crossing the room to grab one of them. “I’m glad you two are getting along. Reaper texted me saying he’s on his way back and to have a joint set up for him because he needs it.” He chuckled, placing a few prerolls down on the nightstand. “He used to stay in here when he was younger. It’s his story to tell but after he fell into some shit that was going to actually get him killed, he came here for a while. I saved it and made sure it was blocked off from recreational use.”

The nasty sex that happened in the clubhouse.

“Thank you so much.” Bunny smiled up at him, starting to search through the bag. “Oooo you got me fudge stripes?!” They were Sterling’s favorite, but everyone knew that Bunny was the one who introduced them to him. “You’re the best!” She went to give him a quick hug before moving to make the bed.

“No problem, little rabbit. Listen,” Viper started, “I’m sure you know he’s pissed right now. You seem to know just how to handle him, but he’s very unpredictable at times and I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“He’d never hurt me.” Bunny defended instantly, she had full confidence in the fact.

“I’m not saying he will. I’m saying, if you ever feel unsafe, don’t stay quiet.” Viper’s tone was serious. He had known Harry for a very long time and he admittedly had never seen him so enamored. Anger, much like lust and love, were strong emotions that Reaper didn’t have much experience with containing. “Remember, I’m here to protect you too.” It’s what her father had asked of him.

“Hey, sorry to interrupt but the kitchen is just about to start making lunch so if you wanna take over, now is the time,” Mia confirmed as she stepped into the room. She thought it looked rather charming now that she’d cleaned it up a bit. Not the best, but better than it’s looked in years.

“Right well, duty calls. Tell Harry I’ll be in the kitchen. I’m sure he’ll want some time on his own.” Y/N walked past Viper with a closed lipped smile, still feeling strange after his warning.

—-

Harry walked inside and immediately searched for her. The only person that could keep him remotely sane at the moment.

“Where’s my girl?” He grunted at the group playing cards.

“In the kitchen with Mia. The girl knows where she belong-” Harry had his gun out and the safety clicked off before he could finish the sentence.

“Watch your fucking mouth when you talk about her.” He growled. One wrong move and Harry could snap. Today was not the day, not in the slightest. “I’ll make sure you don’t get any of the shit she’s making.” He knocked the gun against his temple before putting the safety back on and stalking towards the kitchen, hearing an offhand comment about him being pussy whipped. He didn’t care. Maybe he was.

It was good fucking pussy.

He felt a little sliver of relaxation when he saw her in her element. She had an old apron on as she bustled across the kitchen. It was an industrial kitchen that they’d invested in for the large clubhouse parties they had, and his Bunny was obviously loving it. A happy smile on her face as she had her phone connected to a playlist and she chatted with Mia. A bit of cocoa powder was on her neck, the smell of some sort of baked good in the air.

“Told you! It’s not that bad. You taught me tacos and I taught you Lava cupcakes that won’t deflate.” Mia grinned, bumping her hip against Y/N. Harry watched as his girl turned back towards the stove to stir, his body gravitating towards her without any accord of his mind.

Arms wrapped around her from behind, his face hiding in her neck as he engulfed her in a hold. “Smells good.” Was all he was able to say, pressing a kiss to her neck as she stood frozen for a moment. She only relaxed when she realized who it was.

“How do you move so quietly?” Y/N asked as she placed her hands over his biceps. They were her favorite, so smooth and strong and covered in tattoos. She waited a few moments for him to pull his head from her neck but he didn’t budge. It seems he really needed it.

Y/N continued to stir the raspberry compote on the stove, moving it off the heat so it wouldn’t burn while she was loving on her man.

“You okay, baby?” She cooed, taking the moment to turn around and wrap her arms around him in a tight hug. Y/N knew he’d feel comfortable stepping out of his Reaper headspace in the confines of the kitchen. The women were happy to see the man so love-struck.

“Mia cleaned up your old room for us. Fresh sheets, everything’s been wiped down… Viper left some pre-rolls on the bedside table for us.” Bunny felt a sense of relief wash over her now that he was back and safe with her. “Lunch is just about ready, but we don’t have to eat with everyone if you’d rather have some quiet time.”

“Yeah, I’d like to eat just with you. If that’s okay with you.” He didn’t want to cut off her social time but he needed to be alone with her. To just observe her for a bit. Last time he had shut off from her, made her upset and this time he didn’t want even a tiny sliver of that happening. He was trying his best.

There was no such thing as good company for Reaper when he was in this sort of mood. His head was a wreck of nerves because… well, his girl was in trouble. A girl he didn’t deserve, one he had entangled himself with so deeply that he knew he was going to be in a lot of damn trouble with later in. But for now? He was going to take every little moment, every little ‘baby’ whispered just to him and hold it as close as he could.

“Okay.” She said with her best reassuring smile. As much as she was terrified, she knew Harry had it covered. Perhaps it was a bit naive of her, but seeing how fired up he got in regard to her own safety made her feel even more connected to the man. He cared, he was going to take care of it. Even with the residual stomach ache she had of the dumbass daring to break into their safe spot, no matter how disgusting she felt about the fact he was watching…. She felt safe with Harry.

She turned her head up and pressed a kiss to his jaw, rubbing her nose against him. “Let me make us a few plates. Mia can handle the rest.”

Hesitantly, Harry let her pull away from him to get their food. Only a few more minutes and they could retreat to their room for some peace and quiet. Just how Harry liked it. He couldn’t believe he was back to staying at this hell hole. That she would have to stay here after finally settling in at his place.

He felt like he was doing a terrible job at keeping her safe and secure and it was wearing down on him a bit. Is this what the fucker wanted? He was so tired of thinking about him. He just wanted her.

“Almost done, one second baby.” Bunny’s voice tore him from his thoughts, thank fuck for her. Honestly. “Okay, Viper said he put a little fridge in there for us so we have drinks. Do you need anything else while we are here?”

Y/N had a feeling that once they were in that room they wouldn’t want to come back out unless it was completely necessary. The two of them needed to decompress for a few hours at the very least.

Choosing not to speak, Harry nodded his head no and instead took the plates from her hands.

“I’ll see you later Mia, thanks so much for everything! I’ll see you later, enjoy your lunch!” Y/N grabbed a few cupcakes, utensils, and napkins allowing Harry to lead the way back to their room.

—--

The room was a blast from the past. Sure, he had crashed here a few times since getting his own places but to be staying here for a bit…. It was a weird feeling.

Sitting on the edge of the bed after they finished their food, he watched Y/N go through her bags that he had brought. He didn’t know how long it would take to get the new security system in but he knew that he needed to prepare for anything.

“Did I get everything?” He rasped, her head popping to the side as she nodded. Standing back up and walking over to stand between his legs. Her hands raked through his hair as he rested his head on her breasts, hands settling on her hips as he took a deep breath. He had seemingly forgotten to do that all day, but her touch reminded him that he needed to calm down a little bit.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered into the air. “My place should have been a place to be safe and instead, it was somewhere else he had gotten close. I got too distracted with you and I just….” He shook his head against her. “It makes me so angry.”

“Shhh… listen to me,” Y/N let her nails scratch against his scalp to calm him. “Don’t blame yourself for this, it’s not your fault… you had a security system and seemingly good guards for years, how could you have known this would happen?” This was all obvious to her, but he was not thinking clearly. He was blaming himself because he had promised to protect her and he had control issues.

“I know you’re angry, very angry. As you should be, it’s fucked up that he managed to get into your building and we had to go elsewhere. But I’m safe, I’m with you… we can’t let him think he can get away with this.” Bunny leaned her head down to kiss the crown of his head.

“We knew things would start happening once we provoked him, we can’t act surprised that he’s responding… it’s just, scary that he’s so persistent. I don’t think it’s smart to doubt him. He could really do anything. I’m the one he wants, so as long as someone is with me, I can’t get hurt.”

“You’re always safe with me. As soon as I get my hands on him, he’s going to die, Y/N.” He used her full name, making her blink a few times. He didn’t use it all that often and this was a serious use, making her tilt her head down at him.

“I’m telling you… the moment I get my hands on this man, turn the other way. Run. Do not stand and watch or try and pull me off. Okay? I won’t….” He swallows the lump in his throat. “I can’t be stopped when I get the chance. I’ve killed people before, but I want to watch the life drain from his eyes. I want to watch his fear. Make him beg for mercy and not give it to him because that’s what he deserves.” His breathing picked up, Harry stood up and moved away from her.

“I’m going to tear him apart. I don’t want you to see me like that because it’s… I won’t stop. He’s threatened you, scared you, stalked you? He’s hiding behind cowardly notes, he’s trying to act like he’s smarter than us… I want to burn him alive but that’s too easy of a fucking death. I want to gut him.” He was getting worked up again. “And you’re not going to want to be with me after that. I get that. I’m not easy to be around. I won’t let him get to you. I can’t. I’d rather get shot than let him be alone with you.”

It was clear that once Harry got wrapped up in his own thoughts it was hard for him to calm down. Spending so much time with him, she’d learned some of his triggers and ways to get him to relax.

“You don’t have to justify yourself, Harry. I know what you’re going to do to him, you have been very vocal about it… I haven’t stopped you.” Any sane person would be terrified of him, but it seemed Y/N was too desensitized to all of it. It didn’t phase her that he wanted to kill this man, she felt his anger was justified. Was that fucked up? If she was strong enough to do it herself, she probably would.

“Why are you so sure I’m not going to want to be with you after he’s gone?” Bunny took a few steps closer to him, letting her hands slip under his shirt some skin to skin contact. “Are you forgetting how long I’ve been waiting for this? How long I’ve known that you’re dangerous? Harry, if I didn’t want to be here and if I didn’t want you, I would not be kissing you the way that I do when I do.”

Harry felt himself calm a bit with her hands on his skin, taking a breath as she rubbed his body gently. Her reassurance that she wouldn’t want to leave after he killed him was nice but he didn’t fully believe it. Thank god she was here. She handled things miles better than anyone else would.

“I suppose so.” He replied, responding to her touch by pulling her in and hugging her body to his own. It was easier with her to express things physically. He let out a sigh, trying to collect himself from his outburst.

He didn’t want to explain all the other reasons she would leave to her at the moment. He didn’t want to ruin any time he could have with her. “Remind me…. How long you’ve wanted me?” His lips pecked hers, wanting to be reminded and soaked back in that glow of knowing he wasn’t the only one with pining issues. “Tell me about that. We never talked about it and I need my mind off of this other stuff… I have been neglecting you and we should just relax.” He felt so scattered, so uncontrolled it was infuriating. He needed to focus on her to pull it all in.

She noted the switch up and chose not to say anything, instead melting into the kisses he was giving her. He was right, now wasn’t the time to worry about the future. Right now, they needed to focus on the moment. Y/N could definitely do that.

“Mhmmm,” She hummed against his lips, “Why don’t we get comfy and smoke those j’s and talk about it? I’ll tell you anything you want to know.” Bunny seemed to know the way to his heart, the smile on his face made her giggle. He was really that easy.

“God, could you get any more perfect?” She was right, this would do just the trick.

Bunny took this time to strip down out of the outfit she put on this morning, deciding to stay nude rather than put on a shirt. Sure, it could lead to other things, but she mostly just wanted to be able to feel him.

Y/N climbed into the fresh sheets, humming to herself in relief. Sure it wasn’t as cozy as his bedroom, but it didn’t matter where they were as long as she was with him.

“Baby.” His mouth dried as he turned around, seeing her naked body crawl into the bed. He was quick to make sure the door was locked before giving her a brow, his cock twitching pathetically.

He was a fool. A fool for her, as strange as it may seem. Just a mere flash of her body had him ready to go- but it wasn’t time for that yet. He needed to relax for a moment. Chill out.

“I will be taking advantage of your nakedness in a little while.” He warned, stripping his shirt off and climbing in with her. The lighter sparked up as he lit up, taking a drag and exhaling heavily.

Fuck, he needed this shit.

“Get to puffing and talking, little girl. I want to hear about you pining after me.”

“Okay okay so,” Y/N took a few pulls from the joint as he passed it to her, “I um… I don’t really know when it started to be completely honest.” She tried to think back to a time before she had a crush on him, but it seemed it was instant. “I think at first I was just being the shy little sister, I thought you were handsome and cool and I was obviously younger so I was embarrassed.”

She was 10 years old when she first met Harry. The 16 year old was getting into all kinds of trouble around town, it was a blessing that Viper took him in as an early prospect. It was there at the clubhouse that he had met Sterling and the two hit it off instantly.

“It was just a crush, I genuinely thought it would go away… but as I got older it was harder to ignore. Especially because you were always so nice to me and you just, you didn’t treat me like Sterling did? You always listened even if you thought what I was saying was silly, I never felt like I was annoying you. Maybe I was but—” Bunny began tracing shapes on his chest, only pausing when it was her turn to take a hit.

“But there was this one day I remember, I was 17, I was so horny— I purposely put on a tiny little bikini and laid out by the pool just so you’d look. I think that was the first time I actually planned to try and seduce you.” She laughed thinking back, but he wanted the truth. Didn’t he? “I was so embarrassed after that, I tried to forget about it so it wouldn’t haunt me in college, but it did.”

Harry laughed with her, wincing at her admission. God, it was a little hard to hear only because he certainly wasn’t looking at her back then- but it felt good to know he had been the object of her affections for quite a long time.

“I have to admit… I wasn’t looking at you that way. I think I ended up telling you to cover up because you were close to flashing us.” He shook his head, feeling bad now knowing how she had felt.

“I could tell you had a bit of a crush but I didn’t know it went to that level. I thought you were trying to mess around and make fun of me for that stuff.” He took the joint from her, inhaling his own before letting go. He watched the smoke billow above their heads. “So how long did it last, that crush? Did it get worse or just kind of stay the same?”

Obviously, she had to have felt something for him again now that they were doing… this. Whatever this was. A relationship, maybe? He wasn’t positive. He wanted that, sure, but he didn’t want to be assuming of it and make a fool out of himself. “I remember that one time when you were 19, turning 20 and you crawled into my lap and were really close to me. I thought you were fucking around because you kept giggling but now I’m thinking maybe you weren’t.” She had played off his rejection well if she wasn’t serious.

“Oh, that?” She remembered that night very vividly despite the alcohol in her system. She only remembered because it involved him. How he had shut her down with hunger in his eyes. “I definitely wasn’t fucking with you then… the way you were looking at me I thought you wanted me to, it’s actually why I had the balls to do it in the first place.”

Her in her tiny dress, feeling nervous as ever even with the liquid courage in her system. He looked so good sitting on the couch, he hadn’t stopped watching her all night with those eyes.

“I was really embarrassed after that too, I swore I wouldn’t do it again. But I still had feelings for you.” Y/N tapped the spliff against the ashtray, taking another puff before continuing.

“Do you remember that night when you picked me up from work at the ice cream place?” That was the night that changed everything.

-four years prior-

She had been wincing at the tight grip Josh had on her, his stronger hand tugging her towards his car. “You need to just fucking listen to me, Y/N. Fuck. You’re supposed to be good.” He huffed, eyes dark.

3 years her senior, the 20 year old preyed upon a freshly 17 year old Y/N from their part time job. She was eager to please people and make them happy, bending to their whims as a newly formed adult usually was.

“You’re hurting me, Josh. Stop.” She said weakly, trying to dig her heels in the ground but he yanked again causing her to whimper. His grip burned, twisting the skin- and then it was gone.

A thud of a body hitting metal and a dark growl of a voice filled the air instead, her throbbing wrist cradled to her chest as wide eyes took in Harry’s taller form holding her boyfriend by the neck.

“Like to prey on young girls, huh? Like to abuse them? You piece of shit.” He spit, fist cocking back and nailing him right in the cheek. A yelp sounded from the weaker man, a pathetic ‘stop’ coming from him lips.

“Stop? Stop?” He laughed maliciously, hitting him again. “Don’t think you listened when she asked. So why should I?” He jostled him again. “Huh? Scum of the earth.”

Sterling had texted Harry to pick Bunny up from work that evening. It was a standard procedure, but he’d been running late on an assignment Viper sent him on. So of course, he called the only other person he’d trust with his sister.

Harry himself was running late having just closed shop on the other side of town, but you better believe he was going to make it to get her in time. Or so was the plan.

He hadn’t expected this.

“No—!” Josh’s words were silenced as Harry shoved his face against the hood of the car. He was angry. He’d seen the bruises on her arms before, thought she was just clumsy, but now he’d seen proof that wasn’t the case. It was worse.

“Shut the fuck up,” Harry growled, his grip so tight he swore he could have cracked his skull with his bare hands. “You’re gonna listen to me closely, yeah? Gonna quit this job, gonna stay the fuck away from Y/N, and if I ever hear you’ve done anything to hurt her or any other girls again— I will not hesitate to make you disappear.”

“You can’t d-do this!” The guy tried, but Harry lifted his knee up to nail him in the testicles. A real sob came out of the piece of shit making him roll his eyes.

“I can and I will. I’ll dismember your body piece by piece and have your hand delivered to your family and the rest scattered around town. No one will find you, and if they do? They won’t say shit. You think you’re strong and manly for putting your hands on a woman?” He slammed his face further into the car. “You’re not. You’re a pathetic, worthless piece of shit that doesn’t deserve even a second of a girl like her’s time. If I see you around her, there is no second warning. The only reason you aren’t dead right now is because I don’t have time to clean up the mess.”

He released him and watched him fall to the ground, kicking his side before going to Y/N. “C’mon, Bunny. You won’t see this sad excuse of a boy again.” He placed his hand on her back and lead her toward his truck. “You okay?”

For a second Bunny didn’t move.

She couldn’t believe what she had witnessed. It all happened so quickly but as always, Harry was there at the right time. Y/N never really thought much of Josh’s aggression, but tonight she had seen a side of him she felt terrified of.

Josh, insisting she come over to his house after work despite it being a school night, was not taking no for an answer. The poor girl was tired and honestly just wanted to go to bed, but Josh had other plans for them. Plans Harry had thankfully cut short.

“Y-yeah. I’m okay,” Bunny nodded, taking in deep breaths as she walked to the car. She didn’t want to seem weak, didn’t want to admit she was wrong for previously defending her boyfriend who was so ready to ignore her boundaries. They’d all warned her about him before.

It was then in that moment that Bunny came to the realization she wasn’t quite over her crush on Harry. If anything it just got so much more intense.

He stood up for her, protected her, told her she deserved better, told her she was a good girl. She had always felt safest and most comfortable with Harry, in ways she could never be with Sterling. Sterling was tough on her, had expectations, at times he wasn’t so kind about it— but he meant well.

Harry was patient with her, Harry always made sure she was okay and read between the lines. He took the time to compliment her on things that she cared about. He made her feel seen and valued.

“Thank you,” Was all she could think to say. “Thank you for coming to help me and thank you for um… getting rid of him.” Y/N looked at him with a slightly pained gaze. She wasn’t the object of his affection as much as she made herself out to be in her head. She’d never find anyone else like him, but she could try.

-end of flashback-

“I do. I should have killed him then.” He grunted, messing with the ends of her hair as she smoked. “I hated all your boyfriends. They weren’t good enough for you. Wasn’t even jealousy, though now I could make them disappear for having touched you at all. They simply weren’t.”

Bunny had terrible taste in men but she also got taken advantage of for her sweet nature. They thought of her as a pushover. And she sort of was until she decided to grow a backbone and was dumped for it, leaving her single for quite a bit.

“I thought of you as a kid for quite a while. You were. I watched you grow up. Didn’t start seeing you as a woman until around that time anyway. You coming home from uni and you were about to turn 20… such a pretty little thing. You developed and held yourself differently… you just blossomed. I’d always been fond of you but never like this.”

“Yeah?” Y/N couldn’t stop her smile, a giggle erupting the more his words settled in. “I’d just broken up with Ian. I was so pissed off he just up and decided to move and didn’t even bother telling me.” She rolled her eyes, “But I was in my revenge era when I came back… I honestly didn’t think that’s what would work.”

Years of trying to get him to see her in the way she’d seen him and the moment she let go he was on to her. A light bulb went off in her mind, letting him finish the joint, before deciding to recreate the evening they were discussing now.

“Was sitting like this,” Bunny trailed off as she straddled his lap, her hands resting against his bare chest. He still had boxers on, but the thin fabric was doing very little for them.

Good.

He rose his brow as she straddled his lap. God, he was sexy. Y/N looked down at him as his head was propped up, his long hair pushed out of his face and smoke leaving his lips as he put the rest of the joint into the ashtray.

“Yeah… you caught me off guard back then.” His voice was raspier from smoking, his hands laying on her thighs as she perched herself on top of him. Her nude body exposed to him was a sight to see. His nails gently ran down the skin of her upper thighs, watching as she checked him out.

“What was your plan that night, princess?” He questioned. “You seemed so determined. Played it off as a joke but it wasn’t. And you certainly weren’t naked but… almost. Slutty little dress you had on. I like this view better.”

“Was gonna kiss you,” Y/N hummed at the thought, moving her arms around his neck to lean in closer. “Wanted to ask you why you were looking at me like that… but you stopped me before I even got to.” The girl pouted a bit.

“I was hoping if I got really lucky, you’d take me to my room and fuck me.” Y/N’s eyes were glossy, both from the weed and the lust. Bunny could never quite explain how strongly attracted she was to him, but surely he could tell with how touchy she was with him. “I would have taken your cock right on that couch if you let me… you looked so good too.” Her mouth watered as she remembered the silky white button up contrasting against his sun kissed skin.

Bunny leaned down to kiss his jaw, dipping down to kiss at his neck. It was then that she had the confidence to bite down, giving him a taste of his own medicine and marking him.

“Wanted everyone to know you were mine…” She remembered how her friends kept asking her who he was. How she had to remind them of her crush and how she barely trusted her one friend after the stunt she wanted to pull.

“Hmm… was I?” He questioned, sliding his hands up over her hips, letting out a pleased sigh as she kissed on him. This was hot. The guilt had been too much that day, the idea of his best friend’s little sister being a grown woman and being attracted to her having taken up too much space in his brain… but now? Now he didn’t care anymore.

His hands burned a trail on her body, finding her ass and cupping each side in his palms as her lips crawled over his skin. “Was I yours? Naughty fucking girl. You’ve been filthy this whole time… talking about taking my cock right on that couch. In front of everyone?” He pulled a hand away from the hot flesh, flattening his palm and bringing it down to spank her. He felt her jolt, his hand coming back down to soothe the sting.

“Can’t believe you’ve been gagging for my cock for this long.” He chuckled, the heat of her cunt felt through the fabric of his briefs. “Slut. Jealous, silly little slut.”

She gasped against his skin, settling back into his rough touch as he began to knead the stinging skin. Bunny could only groan, pulling away from his neck with a pop.

“You got me that bracelet…” Y/N licked the string of spit her mouth had left, admiring the mark she’d created. Bunny was proud of herself, he looked so handsome like this. Covered in ink and her bites. “I still have it you know? It’s my favorite.”

The bracelet was hard to miss, she wore it every day and took it off whenever it was time to cook. He noticed it of course but figured she just really liked the style or something.

“Only thing better than that is having your hand as a necklace.” Y/N loved whenever he touched her neck and stomach. It made her whole body tingle, his warm grip always made her melt right into him.

It was a weird combination of fondness and arousal that hit him when she spoke about it. The bracelet had been something to mark her as his? That hadn’t been the intended use but he wasn’t mad about it. If anything; it soothed the possessive beast that was being fed by how much she loved to say she was his.

He removed one of his hands from her ass and pressed his fingers to the sides of her neck, applying just s little pressure to it to make her gasp. “My sweet little Bunny.” He sighed, sitting up with her still snug on his lap. “You’re driving me crazy, y’know that? You love my hand around your neck... being claimed? Marking my neck up like that too, I’ve got to wonder if you’re just as bad as I am.” He pecked her lips, pulling apart and keeping himself an inch apart. She tried to lean forward for more but he shook his head, smiling at the neediness.

“You’re already making a mess on me. Can’t give you too many kisses or you’ll soak straight through.”

“You’re enjoying this? Hmm?” Bunny gave him a massive stroke to the ego, she wondered what else she could get him to reveal. “Tell me more about that night… what did you want to do?” She couldn’t have been the only one thinking about it.

“Kept telling me you’ve been holding yourself back, wanna hear all about it.” Y/N needed to know just what he’d been thinking. It was still a mystery just what he liked, he’d kept things tame with her and followed her lead. It made her wonder what things were tucked away in his mind. The fantasies specifically reserved for her.

Y/N continued melting into his touch, slowly and painfully moving her hips over him to tease them both. It was unspoken the way they were both trying to see who would break first. She hoped neither of them did.

“What do you think, Pet? Think I didn’t want to steal you away and take you right in your bedroom, hold your mouth quiet while I fucked you? I did. It made me feel so fucking guilty. You’re younger than me. Legal for a few years but made me feel so bad about wanting to find out how you taste.”

He had the moral dilemma for a while now, finally giving in and breaking when she stayed with him. She was a grown woman now and she had initiated, she was keeping herself as his girl, wearing the title proudly whenever and wherever she could.

“Then you’d show up to these things in those tiny little shorts and those bra tops… acted like a brat in front of me. Flirting with men you shouldn’t have. Calling me for a ride. You think I wasn’t two seconds away from spanking your ass until it was sore the next morning?” He grit his teeth as he remembered her lacy little tops and her shorts that drove him mad. “Now look at you. Naked in my lap, grinding on me. Letting me smoke you up. You’re a big girl now, aren’t you darling?” His thumb stroked over the side of her throat, pulling her face back towards him. “I’ve barely done half of what I want to do with you.”

The thought made her shiver with need, she couldn’t wait for him to feel comfortable enough to take her whenever he wanted. She loved his needy streaks, the way his hands wrapped around her as a form of comfort. How his breathing was more controlled and his body went limp in her hold.

“Mmmm, perfect for you no? I know just what you like.” She teased, attempting to push forward to kiss him again. “Like that I like to tease, you like me being a good girl, but you love that I’m bad hmm?” Y/N always gave Harry just the perfect amount of pushback. She wasn’t exactly a pushover but submitted to him nicely.

“Are you gonna let me fuck you how I want one day?” She asked curiously, this position on top of him was rather comfortable. Bunny knew she could show him just how good she could make the both of them feel.

“I’ll make you feel so good, Daddy.”

“Of course, I am, baby.” He swallowed, stroking over her bare skin. “M’gonna let you do what you want one day. I love when you’re a bad girl just for me. My sweet little Angel turned a bit filthy.”

Their kiss was wet as he felt her rub on him, the heat of her cunt directly over his cock. It felt really fucking good. Just having her on his lap, rocking on him as he stroked her and played with her body, tasting her tongue… he could do this forever.

It was such a stark difference from how he was with anyone else. It was just an in and out. With his girl, though? He wanted to savor each and everything. Sure, he rushed sometimes… but times like this, he savored each and every little bit as she spoke to him with her raspy sex voice.

“What’s the way you want, baby? How do you want to fuck? Don’t be shy.” He bit on her lip, making her gasp at the slight sting. “Tell me.”

“You’re so impatient, baby.” She cooed, pushing his hair back behind his ear. Bunny loved that she had something to grip on to, tugging at the hair by the nape of his neck. “I wanted so long for this, why would I spoil my fun?” Her bratty side was often out around him.

She felt safe enough to challenge him, knew deep down he could never really deny her. It had always been this way when she used to hang around him when her father was mentoring him in mechanics.

“I do, however,” She trailed off, placing wet kisses on his neck. “Want to use your cock to the fullest, ride you to my heart's content, keep you deep inside me…”

Her skin was on fire at his touch, hips still moving agonizingly slow. She could take this, tease them both till they snapped.

“Use me?”

Harry had been aware of the fact that she dirty minded since they’d started this whole thing. She had been eager and needy, always giving him what he wanted. It wasn’t a shock she was waiting on her own turn to use him. He loved how she touched him, how she raked her nails down his neck and sucked bruises onto the most sensitive parts of his skin. He had met his match in a lot of ways with Bunny.

“Fuck.” He grunted, hand gripping her hip as she rocked her cunt over his clothed cock. Over and over again, teasing him with each brush. He could feel her begin to seep through the fabric, the slickness of her cunt making a mess of his briefs and he didn’t give a single fuck about it. In fact, he encouraged it. “You can have it. Can have me whenever you want. I’ll give you what you want.”

She didn’t even know the extent that went to.

“Whenever I want?” Bunny smiled against his skin, nipping another bite to match so it matched the other side. “You’ll let me do whatever I want?” Y/N pulled back to look at him, her hand still gripping at his hair. Her eyes searched his, breathing heavily from the torturous hip movements.

Harry’s eyes were glossy, mind a bit hazy from the joint, he was so focused on his pleasure that he truly didn’t care how he got it. He wasn’t one to feel shy, especially not around her. Not when she opened herself up to him so well, the sweet thing.

“Whatever you want.” His hand gripped her skin tighter, forcing her to further down onto his cock. The weight of his hand was guiding her hips to speed up. A steady pace, but nothing too fast.

“Would you beg for me?” She countered, “Just how much self-control do you have?” Y/N created enough resistance with her hips to make him whine. She only felt like she could get away with this because he was so relaxed in this moment. He was truly free of thought and focused entirely on her and her alone.

“Fuck, yeah.” He groaned as he felt her move harder on top of him. It was a bit odd, how good it felt. Anything with Y/N felt incredible, but he hadn’t done this sort of thing in so long. He certainly didn’t remember it feeling this good.

Maybe it was just her.

Her fingers tugged at his hair a bit and her cunt rubbed over his prick, the added friction of the fabric made him weak. He was so far gone for her as it was, mix the intoxication and her naked body with the feelings he had been growing for her? It was a recipe for his devotion.

“I’ll do whatever y’want, baby. You’re perfect.” He slurred, lifting his knees a bit as she rocked on him, the hips moving at a faster pace and making his cock twitch against her. “Please, baby. My pretty girl…. Keep talkin’. You sound so hot.” His eyes hooded as she gripped his hair tighter, moving his face up as she pinned him with her eyes.

God, that did something to him.

A smug smile appeared on her face as she stared down at him, leaning forward to sponge a few loving kisses to his lips. The big and scary Reaper was melting in her hands, giving in to her in ways she’s positive no one else had experienced. He was so malleable for her.

“You look so good for me right now, so hard too… It’s taking everything in me not to sink down and fully soak your cock.” The time would come for that, but right now she was enjoying the little bubble of tension. She had never been so horny that she could cum with dry sex alone, not since she was a teenager anyway.

“And how would you feel if I….” She trailed off, her hand moving to cradle his neck the way he had always done with her. “S’ that alright?” She leaned forward for a kiss once again. “Just like you own me, I own you. Don’t forget that.” While her grip was much more gentle, she kept her tone firm.

By no means did she see him ever submitting to her, but she’d hoped she could get him to a space where he could let go. Fully. Where he could relax into her grip and let her love on him and his body the way he had always done for her.

“So handsome, so strong.” She cooed, “You’re so fucking sexy. Even when you’re mad.”

“Fuck.” His eyes rolled back as he felt the hand wrap around his throat. Anyone else would be pinned to the ground if they tried it- but she was right. She did own him. Heart, soul, and apparently, his cock. He loved how she wasn’t afraid of him. Harry knew he would do anything in his power to prevent her from ever fearing him. It may be hard, but he was motivated to keep it.

Her words of praise were whispered against his skin as she kissed over his jaw, his hands helping her move. The fingertips dug into her waist and she loved the slight sting of it, how he groaned and she could feel it against her palm.

“Just keep rubbing like that. Shit, it’ll make me cum if you don’t stop.” It was almost embarrassing. He hadn’t had dry sex, dry humped, in ages. But he supposed this wasn’t so dry. Her cunt was keeping the fabric damp.

“I intend to.” Bunny wanted nothing more than to feel his cum leak through his boxers. Of course, she would rather it be inside of her, but this had become hotter than she had ever imagined.

“Can you get it all wet for me? Want it to be sticky, said you liked it messy hmm?” Y/N was on a roll, grinding down a bit harder now as she felt her own pleasure begin to stir. “God, love how you fall apart for me. Only me.” She moaned out, “Wanna see your face when you make your mess.”

Y/N wasn’t sure where this was coming from but she couldn’t seem to get her mind off of the idea. She loved the sounds he made for her, the way his eyes looked so far gone, he was desperate for her to give him this release. She wanted nothing more than to give it to him. To please him.

Harry was pretty positive he couldn’t deny her of much of anything. Not when she spoke in that pretty little croon, grinding her wet cunt right up on him and making him feel a bit out of control all over again. She was the only one capable of getting him to this state.

“You’re….” He grunted, not finishing his sentence as she moved on him, her fingers squeezing just a bit on the sides of his neck. It made it a bit more difficult to breathe, a rush hitting him as her lips brushed his jaw and her rolling hips hit him just right, it sent him over the edge.

“Fuck.” He rasped, a deep moan erupting from his throat as he began to make a mess of his briefs. Sticky cum coating the fabric as she continued to grind on him. It wasn’t something he would have suggested himself- but fuck, did it feel good.

The mix of shame and pleasure was oddly satisfying. She had wanted him to do this but he had been insistent on making her cum first most of the time. He wanted to take care of her, make Bunny feel like a priority.

“That’s it,” Bunny wasn’t quite done with him, feeling the wetness on his boxers every time she pushed up. “Perfect.” He really was. The way his lips parted, head lulling back against the rusty bed frame. “Sound so good. I’m so close.”

Y/N felt her cunt twitch, his panting was music to her ears. His skin was covered in a thin layer of sweat, body limp and relaxed. It was so hot to see him like this, completely in his element with no guard up. Just Harry, raw and pure.

“I’m close, baby,” Bunny whined, moving her thumb over his lips just before kissing them. “Just watching you— fuck.” Her hips snapped up sharply as a wave of pleasure hit. “Does it feel good? Looks like it does, tell me what you like.” Bunny was insistent.

“Feels fucking great.” He laughed, eyes glazed as he watched her rock over him. He was a bit sensitive but he didn’t care, watching her pleasure. Bunny deserved to cum.

“Like when you get desperate for me… when you beg. Rubbing that clit all over my cock. Love watching you fall apart.” His voice was raspy, hands gripping her sides and helping her move a bit harder on him. “S’sensitive but I love it. Love feeling you rub on me, taking your pleasure. You do it for me…‘I want t’do it for you, baby.”

Y/N hadn’t heard him talk like this before. Being kind of whimpery and sweet and feeling his desperation for her orgasm. She loved every single bit, eating it up.

“We’re making such a mess. I want you to clean it with your tongue, want you t’suck it. Don’t want you to waste a bit of my cum. It should be inside of you.”

“I will— I wanna,” Bunny was so close she could barely think straight. A delicious feeling was bubbling in her tummy, urging her to keep grinding over him. The patch she had created had doubled in size, every movement bringing the fabric down just enough to see the slickness beneath his waistband.

“Ah fuck,” She squeezed her eyes shut, holding her breath as the pleasure erupted. As if her nickname had been chosen for this very moment, she felt like a bunny the way she was desperately chasing for more.

It was overwhelming, but she couldn’t stop. The feeling was far too good and the look in his eyes was one she wanted etched into her memory forever.

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