#done that- id fucking quit man like fuck this either pay me more or move me bc this is killing me

[bunnyb34r]

Working two 6-day work weeks back to back with two days off in between them is the epitome of hell

#im so burnt out bc holy fuck man #at least i dont work curbside bc the two ladies there worked 16 hours straight yesterday and this isnt the first time this MONTH theyve #done that- id fucking quit man like fuck this either pay me more or move me bc this is killing me #they need to hire people ONLY for curbside the next 20 people they hire bc jfc man #im so wound up/burnt out that i almost destroyed my garden the other day bc two plants flooded and it made me unreasonably angry #like i like having two days off back to back but 6 day work weeks aint working for me specially not back yo back #the amount of times ive considered taking up smoking or drinking since starting my job man... unreal #marquilla

[finelinevogue]

What if a security guard wouldn’t let you back in the arena if you went out to get something. And they didn’t believe that you were harrys gf and just thought you were a crazy fan

oooh it’s been done before but here’s my version!! ;

You were running late.

It was already 7pm and you were only getting out of your car in the car park. Harry was due to be on stage in an hour and you hadn’t even seen him yet. The traffic around Dallas today has been awful. Chocker block. You’d been with Harry all day, up until 3 hours ago when he had to leave the hotel to come to the stadium for rehearsals. Normally you’d go with him, but you were so tired that you wanted a little nap before coming. The problem here was you overslept.

There were no Ubers available and a taxi would be far too expensive at this time, so you drive in Harrys car instead. You’d been following Harry on tour in his car, so when you get to different destinations you can go out on ball day trips if you want to without the obscenity of a huge tour bus or paying for Ubers everywhere. It was the main reason you were so tired though, travelling across country and into different time zones. It would be so much easier if this was the UK.

You grabbed your purse and your jacket, locking the car as you got out and started running for the backstage entrance. It was easy to make it there and you noticed security guards already standing there.

“Hi!” You smiled, slightly short of breathe. You were about to move past them when one of them shoved your shoulder back, making you stumble back unbalanced. “Wha—”

“ID and backstage pass to get through here.” One of them said, looking you up and down as if you were nothing.

If anything, you were quite shocked on how they just treated and continued to treat you. Normally, Harry would show a picture of you to these backstage security guards to make sure you’d be able to get in no problem, but it seemed like today Harry might’ve forgotten to show that photo. This was going to be a problem for you, because you’d forgotten to bring your backstage pass.

“I normally just go through? I’m Harry’s girlfriend.” You tried talking your way around the situation, not appreciating behind held up so close to show-time.

“Oh you’re Harry’s girlfriend? You must be the 7th one we’ve met tonight.” The security guy laughed and so did his friend, making your blood boil with how annoying they were being. Harry would be so pissed if he heard the way they were treating you.

“No but I actually am.”

“Then, ID and backstage passes.” One of then held out his hand whilst the other crossed his arms over his chest to make him look intimidating. Dickheads.

“I have ID just not the backstage passes.” You answered honestly, holding out your ID for them to check. They collected it and asked you questions on it, you answering them all perfectly.

“Well you definitely know you, but you have no proof you’re supposed to be where you claim to be.” They handed you back your ID and you huffed in stress.

“Well what can I show you? Photos of me and Harry together? Text messages?” You waved your arms around, getting really pissed off that this was actually happening. You’d probably miss Jenny’s whole set because of this and then 15 minutes before show-time Harry gets transported under the stage. So you only really would have half and hour with him, and that’s just not enough time. You wanted a safe and warm hug off him. You wanted a kiss. You just wanted him.

“Everyone knows they can be photoshopped.” One of the guys scoffs at your notion.

“Listen. You either show us your backstage pass or we’ll escort you off site.” The other one says a lot more firmer this time. It made you quite anxious for what you’d do if they did that - or maybe when they did that.

“Well I don’t have the backstage passes.” You sighed, rolling your eyes at the way this was going to end.

“Then let’s go.” One of them pointed to where you came from and to the car park, stepping forwards as he did so.

“I’m not leaving until you let me through those doors. My boyfriend is waiting for me.” You answered, taking a step back in stress of what they might do.

“Harry ain’t your boyfriend. Now let’s go!” They stepped forwards again and reached for you.

You swung your bag at one of them, hitting him in his side and he grunted because of the impact of your water bottle with his chest. The other one grabbed your arm and you couldn’t shake him, since you were not trained in any way for situations like this at all. His fingers dig into your skin and it made you scream out a cry, trying to kick him in any way to escape. The other one recovered ever ordered the guy holding you to escort you away whilst he stayed and guarded the door. The one holding you tugged your arms behind your body and held them tight there, it really fucking hurting. He didn’t care though and continued to walk you, asking you where your car was so he could get you out of here.

Once you reached your car he let you go and you wrapped your arms around you as he walked away again, not verbally saying anything but his eyes saying enough. Stay away. You shakily got your keys out of your bags and unlocked your door, climbing in and just sitting there. You could feel your hands really shaky and achy. Looking down with tear clouded eyes, you saw the red marks over your arms and slight bruising already. Your arms and shoulders hurt from being bent in an uncomfortable position.

You cared less about the pain though and how much of a disappointment of a girlfriend you were going to be to Harry. He was going to think either the worst for you or the worst of you. You reached in your bag on your lap for your phone, throwing your bag on the seat next to you afterwards. You wiped your eyes with the sleeve of your t-shirt and unlocked your phone to text messages, sending Harry a quick text.

To Harry: Are you free to call? x

No response. You sat there for a few minutes in silence, still shook up and teary. That had been a really awful situation to be in and you hated that you were nowhere near Harry to fix it. Your phone vibrated 3 minutes later, finding a text message from Harry. You sighed and felt safe when you saw his icon light up your notifications, knowing he was in contact with you.

From Harry: Of course, you okay? xx

You didn’t open your phone because you didn’t know how to respond. How do you tell him you’re not okay, only 20 minutes before he’s meant to be ready to go on stage? You didn’t want to worry him, but you also didn’t want him thinking you were a terrible girlfriend either.

Another vibration.

From Harry: Lovie? xx

Your eyes watered at that simple word, meaning so much more to you than five letters. It made you feel so much comfort, you only wished you could get that hug and a kiss now.

Again.

From Harry: Love, you’re worrying me now.

From Harry: Let me face-time you, hang on.

His icon lit up the screen; Incoming…

You shakily accepted, wiping your eyes quickly before. When he answered you could tell he was still in his dressing room, sat on the sofa that you wish you were also sat on with him. He looked so beautiful. His hair was perfectly styled and he was wearing a pearl coloured silk shirt and you knew he was wearing white silk pants to co-ordinate. You thought he looked ethereal. A glowing beacon of hope and beauty.

He didn’t say anything to you at first and you nothing to him. He just looked at you and instantly knew something bad was up. He kept eye contact with you and it was as if he was having a telepathic conversation with you, understanding that you needed him and just him.

“Hey, Mitch man?” Harry asked, turning his head to somewhere else in the room. “Could y’just give me a minute. Please.”

“Sure, sure.” Mitch answered and all you could hear was the sound of shuffling and the door shut. As soon as he was gone you started crying all over again. You cupped your hand over your eyes and your body shook as you just cried. Harrys heart broke that you were alone and he couldn’t hug you close to his chest.

“Y/N, baby. Look at me.” He asked urgently and you just shook your head, embarrassed that this was happening to you. “You’ll be alright lovie, I promise. Just look at me, beautiful.” You moved your hand away from your face and wiped your eyes and nose to try and make you look slightly better - not that it helped. “There’s my pretty girl.”

You smiled. He smiled.

“I-i’m so-rry H.” You whispered, sniffling in between words because of how shaky you felt.

“Hey, no. None of that. It’ll be okay.” He reassured you, keeping eye contact with you to try and decipher what was wrong. “Where are you, lovie? You’re in the car, yeah?” Harry asked, recognising your surroundings but you could get anywhere. You could have been in an accident for all he knew, but he was remaining calm so he didn’t send you into a panic.

“Yeah. In the stadium car park.” You saw Harrys eyes momentarily light up at that, before he remembered that you weren’t okay.

“Okay. Tell me why you’re upset, love. Help me understand.” He sounded urgent, just wanting to know so he could help you out. He wanted you to be okay. He wanted you with him.

“The security guards wouldn’t let me in, backstage I mean. I didn’t have my backstage pass. But..” You choked on a sob and Harry told you to just breathe. You were okay. “One of them g-grabbed me and escorted m-me of sight.”

“Baby, are you hurt? Is that why you’re upset?” Harry asked, standing up now in panic. His face looked angry, but you could tell he was trying his best to be a comfort for you. “Y/N?”

“Y-yes. Yes Harry, yes.” You voice wobbled out and you let out an exasperated sob. “I’m s-sor—”

“No don’t you dare. Don’t apologise for this. Not ever. You understand me?” He made very clear he wasn’t messing around.

“Yes.” You nodded.

“Alright. Now, you gotta be strong for me okay?” He asked, before asking, still checking that you were okay. He knew you would be though, because you were his bravest girl ever - stronger than you knew.

“Okay.”

“You’re going to make your way back to the backstage entrance, alright? I am going to be there, before you get there. Those security guards won’t be there I promise. You’ll be okay. Can you do that for me?” He asked, moving around the room and then out of the door. He was walking down the corridors, ignoring the people shouting his name. He was only focused on you.

“Yes. Okay.” You nodded, wiping under your nose again.

“I love you.” He kissed the camera of his phone, looking like he was kissing you instead.

You returned the gesture, kissing him virtually back. “I love you.”

He told you that it’d be alright and then ended the call, explaining how you didn’t need to hear him get angry when he found these security guards. They would be fired even if they weren’t on his tour crew, he’d make sure of it. You made your way back to the backstage entrance again, slowing down before you rounded the corner. Taking a deep breathe you walked around and were met with exactly what Harry promised; him.

You smiled and broke out into a run to get to him, your bag weighing on your shoulder. Once you reached him your bag was thrown on the floor in front of him and you jumped into his arms. He lifted you up to sit you around his waist, keeping his arms tight around your waist and squeezing the biggest hug out of you. Your arms tightened around your boyfriends neck and you buried your face into his neck, and god he smelt like everything homely and sweet. He felt just like home.

“See, you’re alright now lovie.” He assured you, kissing your cheek that wasn’t quite buried into his neck.

“Th-ank you.” You muttered, kissing his neck in appreciation which made him hum in delight. He tasted so hot and lush. He was insatiable. You then felt him start kissing your arms, where the harsh red and purple marks were.

“Sorry y’had to go through this.” He kept kissing your arms, until you moved your head up and looked at him with furrowed eyebrows.

“If I can’t say sorry, then neither can you.” You shook your head, kissing his nose softly. You watched his eyes flutter close and felt so special that only you could do that to him.

“You’re so amazing Y/N. Truly.”

“You’re pretty special too, my love.”

He didn’t need to hear anything else from you, those words were enough, so he pressed his lips to yours softly, filling you with the love you’d been waiting to feel all day. You smiled into the kiss and he just felt so amazing. He was so soft and gentle with you - as smooth as the silk that dressed his body. He was so pretty to watch melt away under your spell and delicious tasting. Strawberries, was that?

He was everywhere. He was everything. He always would be.

#harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x y/n #finelinevogue #harry styles fanfiction #finelinevogue harry styles #harry blurb #harry oneshot #harry styles concept #hslot texas #hslot series finelinevogue #hslot concept night #hslot2 #hslot #love on tour harry styles #love on tour fanfic #love on tour blurbs #love on tour series #love kn tour #finelinevogue harry styles masterlist #finelinevogue blurbs #love on tour finelinevogue #harry styles backstage #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff

[nightshade-minho]

-Blue Book- (10)

Act 2

Warnings: angsty shit, future smut.

Wc: 1.8k (sorry for the short ass chapter-)

You blinked sleepily, a finger poking your arm and insistently pulling you out of your slumber.

A whine left your mouth as you opened your eyes slightly, Felix's face hovering over yours.

"Lix-" You groaned, pushing him away and casting a quick glance at the clock on your wall. " It's a Saturday morning, fucking let me sleep." You rolled over, burying your face in the pillow as Felix let out a deep sigh.

"Y/n, this is important. There's something I thought I should let you know-"

"Fuck. Off." You growled, voice muffled by the pillow.

Felix sat there for a moment, contemplating his life choices. Why exactly did he think it would be a good idea to try and wake you up at 8 am on a Saturday?

If he told you the news now, you'd be mad at him for having disturbed your precious sleep. If he tells you when it's too late- god, you'd be pissed beyond doubt.

Either way, he'd have to face your wrath. Deciding he didn't want such a pretty morning to be ruined, he put it off. Was it the right decision? Guess he had to wait and find out.

He cast one last glance at your sleeping face, heart beating. He hoped you’d take it well...he doesn’t want to see you devastated again. 

Mentions of him always managed to do exactly that, though. 

He really wasn’t prepared for another night of crying and excessive wine drinking, patting your back as you asked the same question, again and again.

He wished he could let you know you were more than enough, worthy of the world. And he’d be sure to protect you. 

He wasn’t going to hurt you. Not again.

***

When you finally woke up, courtesy of your alarm, you sat up and slid out of bed. Stumbling out of your room, you headed to the bathroom, which seemed to be locked.

"Lix! Come out, I really need to pee!"

"Just a second!"

You groaned and rested your head against the door, letting your eyes flutter closed again. Felix was definitely a wonderful roommate- you'd gotten lucky in that department- but he always hogged the bathroom, and it infuriated you.

You still remembered the day you met Felix again. You'd moved back to the town after about five years, no longer wanting to live with your mom and her insufferable boyfriend. As soon as you graduated, you took advantage of your newfound independence to go back to where it all began.

Running into Felix had been a pleasant surprise. The two of you had gone to a café to catch up. He mentioned his need for a roommate, and since then you'd been inseparable. He re-introduced you to the boys, including Minho who you’d already been in touch with. They’d all been friends even after high school and throughout college, their old group intact. Well, except for him.

Chan had moved away just a few weeks after you had, according to Felix. It had been quite sudden, and there were barely any goodbyes, just like with you. Half the guys had been relieved, apparently. Especially Minho. 

Everything that had happened back in high school seemed extremely childish, now that you were an adult with a job and bills to pay. However, you still couldn't exactly find it in your heart to forgive Chan. He was your first love, after all...and those tend to turn bittersweet. He'd betrayed your trust and played with your feelings. Yes, you were young and naïve, but you should have seen it coming- you'd always thought he was too perfect for you. Too good to be true...

You almost fell forward when the door suddenly opened, snapping out of your thoughts as Felix caught you, chuckling.

"Take a shower, sleepyhead." He chuckled, ruffling your hair as he let you go and walked over to the kitchen, presumably to make breakfast.

You smiled as he left, sleepily removing your sweatpants and shirt when you heard your phone ring from on top of the sink. Pausing, you inched closer and grabbed it as you shut the door, lifting the phone to your ear after a quick glance at the caller ID.

"Minho! I was just about to take a shower-"

A chuckle from the other end. "Sure, I was just calling to remind you."

"Remind me? Of what?"

"We were planning to go to the mall today!" His indignant voice came shooting into your ears. You winced and giggled, clutching the phone tighter as a loud sigh came through.

"Chill, I didn't forget."

A huff. "Good. I'll pick you up in a bit."

You ended the call, a faint smile lingering on your face. Your unlikely friendship with Minho was one the universe itself probably didn't see coming, in all honesty. 

You still remembered how vile he used to be. Yes, he had a reason, but that didn’t exactly erase all the pain and discomfort he’d put you through. 

He’d shown massive regret, though. Proved that he changed for the better. Besides, you couldn’t exactly push him away after finding out what connected the two of you. So, you’d forgiven him...

You wondered if you would ever find it in yourself to forgive Chan the same way- if you ever see him again, that is. The pain he’d caused was worse. You’d trusted him...loved him, only to find out he’d been using you all along. That he was in love with someone else, even as he hugged you and kissed you. As you brushed your teeth, your mind drifted, memories made with him replaying in your head. The feeling of his soft lips pressed against yours...intertwined fingers, his arms wrapped firmly around you as a storm raged on, a similar one swirling in your heart.

You shook your head, rinsing your mouth as you reminded yourself that it was all in the past. There was no point thinking about Chan anymore. You had Felix and Minho, your best friends and the only people that mattered, currently. It was all you needed.

***

Chan’s grip on the steering wheel was loose, his eyes half-open as he drove. He was way too tired, and it was probably dangerous to drive in his state. He was already close, though.

He briefly averted his eyes from the road to check the directions Felix had texted him. Yes, he’d arrive any minute now.

His heart was pounding. He couldn’t believe he was back here, years later. He’d missed this town, to be honest. And yet, at the time, his parents’ transfer had felt like a blessing. A way to escape from the pain he’d felt at your betrayal, as well as your sudden departure.

Felix had told him. You were his roommate. There was a lump in his throat, nervousness and anxiety at the thought of seeing you again brimming up. He didn’t know if he was ready.

The initial anger he’d felt when he saw you with Minho had faded away. All that was left now was disappointment, a faint sadness lingering in the back of his mind at all times. 

You’d been the one to show him what happiness felt like. He’d felt it when cuddling your small frame- skin pressed against skin, your radiant smile etching itself into his brain. He’d felt it when you took him to that museum, showing him what true beauty was. 

He couldn’t forget what you felt like. He’d tried to, with numerous people. And yet...all he could think about was you. Even now, as an adult. And here he was, mere minutes away from having to see your face again.

Just be quick. In, out. Greet Felix, catch up with him a little and that’s it. Come on, Chan. You can do this...

He parked the car, swallowing as he stepped out. This was it.

***

You pulled up your pants just as you heard the doorbell ring. “Coming!’ You shouted, zipping up as you ran over to the door, opening it and glaring.

"Ah, finally! You're late."

"I had to drop Dea at school." Minho shook his head, entering your apartment and heading straight to the kitchen, the enticing smells luring him in.

"Oh. How is she? It's been a while since I saw her."

"She's good. Misses you a little. She asked me when we're all going to hang out again."

"Soon." You assured, knowing you weren't that busy the following week. Following him into the kitchen, you watched Felix flip the pancakes, looking up as Minho entered.

"Hey, Min. Didn't know you were coming today. Want some?" He tilted his chin towards the pan.

Minho smirked and grabbed one of the strawberries Felix had set aside, popping into his mouth and shaking his head. "No, thanks. We've got a movie to catch, so we have to leave right away." You pouted at that, crossing your arms. "But I don't wanna be hungry! Want pancakes." You mumbled.

The two men looked at you, eyebrows raised at your sudden display. Felix cringed, chuckling as Minho cooed at you.

"You're so cute." He pinched your cheek, looking back at his watch. "Ah fuck, we really have to go now, Y/n."

"But-" You looked over at Felix, who flashed you an apologetic grin as Minho grabbed your hand, practically dragging you over to the door.

"Wait!" Felix suddenly called out, cursing under his breath as he remembered what he was supposed to tell you. Fuck, he’d almost forgot.

"There's no time to waste! We'll be back later, Lix-"

It was too late. Felix was secretly glad Minho was taking you away though. Maybe he could quickly get things done with Chan, and get him to leave before you come back? No...it would be unfair to keep the truth from you. He didn't want you to run into Chan on accident, and quite possibly murder him when you get home.

Calming down a little, he turned back to his pan, just as Minho opened the door.

Wait-

Your eyes widened as your eyes landed on the man standing in front of you.

No. It couldn't be...were you hallucinating? Or was that really Chan, frozen in place with his finger hovering over the doorbell?

Unfortunately, it wasn't a trick your brain was playing on you. Minho was staring at Chan too, shell-shocked as the latter's gaze drifted down to your intertwined hands.

A mass of uncomfortable feelings and emotions you'd repressed for years bubbled up to the surface, almost making you want to throw up. This couldn't be happening.

Chan felt the same way. So you were still with Minho? Fuck, the regret in him was raw, painful as it resurfaced. Suddenly, the anger was back.

The prolonged silence was suspicious to Felix. "Hey, guys...?" He frowned and left the kitchen, stopping in his tracks as he saw Chan and you, icy glares evident as you stared at each other.

"Fuck." He gulped, inching closer to the three. "Um. This was what I m-meant to tell you, Y/n. Surprise! Chan's back!" He giggled nervously, the anger in your eyes scaring him slightly as you turned to look at him.

Chan gritted his teeth, eyes still trained on your hands. “I’m back.” He repeated, glaring at you.

Fuck.

#chan angst #bang chan angst #chan smut #bang chan smut #minho fluff #felix fluff #skz angst #skz smut #skz fluff #stray kids angst #stray kids smut #stray kids fluff #minho smut #chan x reader #bang chan series

[yungidreamer]

Claimed

Summary: An intruder enters the territory of Chan and his pack, attacking people and causing havoc. Seemingly by chance he saves a victim that turns out to be his mate, but as fate would have it, he happens to be a wolf at the time. How will he protect her, come clean, and claim his mate?

Word count: 8.2k

Content warnings: slightly dark themes, a werewolf serial killer who is a vindictive asshole, impregnation kink, marking, minor descriptions of violence, sort of stalking, sort of possessive behavior. Some cursing.

Music: Come Out by Lenise Morales and War of Hearts by Ruelle

“Come on, boy,” she said, patting her leg and holding out the leash. “Let’s go on a walk before it gets too late.” Chan hopped up off his round dog bed near the couch, wagging his tail as he came to her. He sat patiently, turning his head to let her reach the leather collar she had put on his neck. Jesus, his pack mates would be in hysterics if they saw him like this, he thought to himself. But he could have endured the embarrassment for her.

How had he ended up like this? Really, it was a mix of destiny and bad luck on  both of their parts. He honestly never thought he would meet his mate when he was in his wolf form and hurt on top of it. Fights weren’t something he got into that often and something he avoided when he could, but that night three months ago he had caught that piece of shit lone wolf stalking her.

Why the loner had picked her, he had no idea, but Chan had to be grateful in some ways. How long would it have been before he ran across her if not for that? Jesus, what if he had gotten there too late? He didn’t want to think about it.

That night he had been sent to track the interloper that had been causing havoc in their territory. He was the first of the pack to actually find him, which must have been luck since Minho was generally the best tracker and Changbin a close second. They had taken the two days before and barely missed catching him at the no-tell motel he had been staying at and at some restaurant where he had mauled some poor woman heading home after her shift. Changbin had been furious with himself for not tracking him fast enough and had been the one to find her bloodied and crying near the back door of the restaurant. He had shifted back to human and called 911, telling them he had been passing by when he heard her crying, a plausible enough story not to raise any suspicion. Besides as far as anyone involved knew, it was a rabid dog attack… a massive rabid dog.

Tracking was exhausting work and got shared amongst all the members of the pack. The third night had been his job and he had taken a neighborhood near the one he had been stalking, suspecting he had moved his hunting grounds but not that far. His hunch had been right, but it was pure luck that he had come across the scent of the intruder as he patrolled, just hoping to catch some hint, some clue.

That whiff had pulled him down an alley and into the strip mall parking lot of the craft store. For the life of him, he could not figure out why on earth he would pick this sort of place. The parking lot was half empty since most of the stores were already closed… except the big hobby shop. The sodium orange lights of the parking lot had flickered and buzzed, bothering his sensitive senses and it must have done the same for the lone wolf… so why on earth would he choose to hunt here.

Chan had spotted him, in human form, leaning casually on a planter half a dozen meters from the entrance to the store taking a drag on a hand rolled cigarette. He had let out an involuntary huffing sneeze, hating the smell as it drifted to him. That had given him away. Even if he hadn’t been able to sense that he was a fellow werewolf, no dog would have been wandering around alone in a parking lot here, like this, at this hour.

“I’m surprised you found me, rover,” the loner had chuckled, self-satisfied and amused. “I would have let you guys be, but you couldn’t just let me hunt a little.” Chan had growled as he watched him stand up, letting the shadows and flickering lights obscure his face as he pulled himself into a standing position. He had moved fast, charging at Chan and drawing a knife just before he got within an arm's length of him. Chan dodged but not fast enough, and the knife caught him in the ribs, grazing over a couple of them before he could dig his teeth into the man’s arm.

“Fuck,” the man yelled, punching Chan in the jaw to force him to let go. Stars sparkled in his vision and pain sliced through him as the knife slid along his collarbone and upper leg. He had gotten one last swipe in before retreating, leaving Chan bloodied and limping.

A safe place to shift was what he had needed, there surely would have been someplace nearby, a little alcove or alley between a couple of the shops, but before he could get very far, she had stepped out of the store, locking up and leaving for the night.  Chan froze. He had been slinking away, slowly trying to get out of view, but was still very clearly in view when she had stepped out. His pain had blinded him to other sensations at first, but even before she turned and saw him, it hit him like a freight train.

Mine the sensation said with a ferocity he had never felt before. Why he had to find his mate like this, he had no idea. He wasn’t particularly unlucky. He didn’t spend tons of time as a wolf either. His pack was pretty chill and was pretty careful to stay below the radar. Their territory was safe and they were known for not being overly territorial, letting people pass through without a problem so long as they left and didn’t make problems. So how he ran across her while he was shifted and injured was just stupidly bad luck.

She had gasped when she finally turned around and saw him, but who wouldn’t when they turned around to see a massive dog behind them limping and bleeding. A moment’s fear had shot through her at the sight until Chan had whimpered, flattening himself on the pavement to look as unthreatening as possible.

“Hey puppy,��� she said softly, putting out her hand for him to sniff as she leaned down, slowly coming closer. “Can I take a look at you?”

Yes please, he thought, rolling gently onto his uninjured side.

“What on earth happened to you… boy?” She asked, catching sight of his belly. “I don’t suppose you are going to make this easy on me and would just get in my car if I brought it around?” She sighed and patted his head. Rubbing his head into her hand, he rolled back over and pulled himself up to stand again. “Maybe you can just come with me, hmmm?” Standing up, she started to move towards her car, keeping an eye on him as he slowly limped behind her. She opened the back door to her car and patted the seat, inviting him to hop in, which he did quite happily. “Well at least that was easy.” She observed, closing the door behind him as he laid down on the back seat. “Now we just have to go spend my whole paycheck at the emergency vets.”

Sorry, he said to her in his head. I’ll pay you back when I can. Pain pulsed through him as the city lights swished over him in the back seat. The emergency vet clinic was only a half an hour away but that was way longer than he would have ever wanted to have to lay bleeding in the backseat of a car. In fact, he really was sure he could have gone his whole damn life without knowing what that felt like.

He was tough, he was the alpha of the group, though he didn’t enforce a hard hierarchy like some did. They were more family than anything else. They looked out for each other, did their part, contributed in any way that they could. It worked well for them and everyone was pretty happy with the arrangement. It was just his job to be the final voice when decisions needed to be made or to speak for the group when dealing with outsiders.

“Can you get up, pup?” She asked when she opened the door in the parking lot of the vet’s office. Chan nodded, though it probably didn’t look like it, what with being a dog and all, and stood up on slightly shaky limbs. Thank god they were close, he thought to himself as he stepped out the door and onto the pavement.

“I need some help please,” she said as they stepped through the automatic sliding door of the clinic.

“Oh my god,” the woman behind the counter said when she caught sight of him, picking up the phone on the desk and hitting a couple of buttons. “Doctor West we need you in reception now please, and bring whoever is back there to help.” She hung up the phone and dashed out from behind the desk. “What on earth happened?”

“I don’t know,” she said looking down at Chan as she kept a hand on his head. “I was just coming out of work and found him like this in the parking lot. Maybe he got cut getting out of a yard or went through a window or something?”

The receptionist had shrugged, it seemed like as good an explanation as any. They had taken him back, stitched him up and scanned him for an ID chip, which, shocker, he didn’t have. With no one else seemingly accountable for him, she had decided to take him home, saying she would try and find his owners. For now, she would pay for the vet bills and she just had to hope whoever owned him would pay her back. Though honestly, given the shape he was in, she wasn’t holding out hope there was someone, or at least someone responsible.

That was how he had ended up here and stuck in his canine form way more than he was used to. The one upside was that he was with her. She had spent a couple of weeks hanging up posters with his picture, but eventually just decided to adopt him herself, leaving him in the weirdest bind he could imagine.

The first few days he had stayed just because everything hurt too much to do anything else. I’ll change back soon, he told himself, I just need the stitches to heal a little first. Then one evening when she came home he could smell him and cigarettes on her and his heart had clenched. The loner had been there for her? For his mate? At that moment, that realization he had a feeling he never would have thought possible. Thank god I was the one that got stabbed. That had settled it. He had to be there, he had to stay and protect her, at least until the intruder was caught.

Not long after that he had shifted when she was off at work, finally getting in touch with his pack. After the understandable chewing out he let Jisung give him since he had basically disappeared without a word for DAYS, he explained what had happened and told him to pick someone to shadow her while she was out or at work. Jisung agreed, letting out a low whistle at the story and the news that he had found his mate. Chan left the details to him and the others, still not feeling even 50% if he had to be honest. He trusted them and for now, he was stuck.

Now it had been three months and the loner was still on the loose and still in their territory. They had no idea why and he had only attacked one person since that night. Now and again, when she came home from work, he would smell him on her, and still other times, he would catch the smell of the loner when they walked through the neighborhood. But it was never enough, never that fresh, and he had no idea how he was flitting around so close yet so far.

Jisung had the brilliant idea of getting one of them hired to work with her at the craft store. Chan had to admit, it had been a good idea, it kept someone close, but it probably wouldn’t have been the solution he would have wanted. Smelling Changbin on her every night when she came home from work rankled him an unbelievable amount, despite the fact that he knew nothing was happening with them. But between smelling his pack mate and the loner on her, and being unable to do anything with her aside from pretending to be her pet was going to drive him mad.

How on earth was he supposed to tell her who he really was? Buck also couldn’t just disappear. And yes, she had named him after the dog in Call of the Wild which was both adorable and painful. She was attached to him...just the wrong him. He needed to come clean but, aside from breaking to her that werewolves existed at all, something that would most likely freak her out, saying, surprise (!) you know that dog you’ve been letting sleep in your bed and changing in front of… well, he’s actually a guy. Because, you know, that would go over really well.

So that was how he ended up on the end of her leash, heading out for a walk. If he didn’t have to do this as a dog and have to make a show of going to the bathroom on these walks, he would be far happier. It was nice being out with her, he just wanted to be able to do it as a person, maybe holding her hand, though he might have tolerated a collar and leash if she really liked it for some reason.

Chan walked ahead of her, scenting the air as they made their evening loop of the neighborhood. All seemed well and normal for the most part, at least for the first half of the walk. But as they made the turn that would head them back towards home the scent of the loner drifted across their path. Chan stopped, causing her to bump into him and make a little sound of surprise as she accidentally stepped on one of his back feet.

“What’s the matter, Buck?” She asked, looking in the direction he was looking. “Did you see something?” Unsurprisingly, he didn’t answer and, after pausing for a few seconds, she moved past him, trying to snap him into moving again. Chan stepped in front of her, preventing her from going as he tried to place where the scent was coming from. “Come on, boy, I want to go home.”

I know, he said mentally, willing for her to understand him. Trust me, me too. Suddenly he saw it, the shape of another of his kind skulking on the other side of a cinder block wall. It’s dark chestnut fur moved slightly in the breeze as the animal stayed stock still. In a split second, it dashed back behind the wall and Chan gave chase. He pulled his leash out of her hand, sending a mental apology to her, and immediately gave chase. He couldn’t let this just keep going on. She called out his name, well the name she had given him, as he disappeared behind the wall, giving chase.

Quick as a flash, he saw the tail disappear around the back of the house on the other side of the block wall. He skidded around the corner, keeping the scent trail of the intruder under his nose. The chase led him through alleys and back yards as they ran and dodged. Finally he saw him disappear over a high fence and Chan lept after him, feeling like he was finally gaining on him.

When he landed he heard a snap and knew immediately that he had made a mistake. A sharp pain shot through his front leg. It had all been a plan, been a trap to get him here, to get him trapped… and to leave her alone. He had never really felt as stupid as he did right now. He finally gathered the will to look down at his leg to see it clasped in a leg hold trap, cut and bleeding, but thankfully not broken, probably by sheer luck. He couldn’t run like this and he had to get back to her.

With a gulp, he changed back, needing the dexterity of human hands to get out of the contraption. It pinched harder, stinging his nerves as his leg turned into an arm, thickening in the vice like grip. It took him a moment to stop seeing stars and then another to figure out how to press down the sides of the trap to open it. When he was finally free, he looked around. He had to get out but running around naked and bleeding was a great way to get the cops called on him.

Making his way to the edge of the neighboring yard, he looked over the wall to see laundry hanging on a line outside. He hopped over the wall and took a t-shirt and some pants, promising to try to remember to bring them back when he could. Once he was dressed, he ran. He ran towards where he had left her; ran like his life depended on it. Ran because hers probably did. His feet barely touched the ground as he rushed back to where he had left her.

Suddenly he heard a scream rend the air and he felt his whole body go cold. So stupid, he berated himself as he willed his body to move faster. Turning the corner a couple of blocks from where he had left her alone, he saw her… and him. The loner had cornered her against a fence in the front yard of some house, a hand around her throat and a knife pressed against her ribs. Without a second thought, Chan rushed forward with a guttural growl. The loner heard him and turned. Momentarily distracted from her, he didn’t notice when she jerked herself down, loosening his grip enough on her neck to fall in the direction opposite the knife he held on her. With his attention torn between two people now, Chan had the upper hand and wrestled him away from her.

“Run,” Chan commanded her as he tackled the loner to the ground. They rolled and grappled like gladiators, vying for dominance, both ignoring her. Something that turned out to be a mistake on the part of the loner. Just as he rolled on top, pinning Chan by gripping his injured arm, she rushed toward them, picking up the dropped knife and driving it into his back. The loner let out a rage filled scream and rolled away from them both as he changed back into his wolf form. Running away as quickly as he could manage and disappearing into the neighborhood.

“Are you okay,” Chan asked, getting up and grasping her upper arms. Her face was a mask of shock, eyes wide and not really seeing anything. “Look at me. Tell me that you are okay.”

“I have to find my dog,” she said, her eyes flashing around them, yet she didn’t pull away. “I think he tried to chase that thing away. He ran off and I need to make sure he’s okay… he was already hurt and…”

“I’m okay,” Chan said to her, giving her a little shake to get her attention. “I’m Buck. You found me in a parking lot and saved me. It’s me.” Her eyes snapped to his face and she went white. “I was following him that night, trying to figure why he was here. That’s how I got hurt, but that’s how I found you.”

“You were looking for me, too?” She shrank back, her eyes searching for something in his face.

“No, but,” Chan sighed. He needed to come clean but this wasn’t the place. Not in the open, not in someone else’s yard. “Let’s go home. Please. Can we talk there?”

“Home?” She asked, looking at him suspiciously.

“Your home,” he corrected. “Just, let me explain. Give me a chance.”

She looked down at the arms that were holding her, finally noticing his cut arm. “You’re hurt.”

“It’s not that bad,” he let go of her arms, trying to hide his injury a little.

“Let me take care of it,” she offered timidly. “Then we can talk.” Chan let out a breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding. With a nod he led them both back to the house, keeping a gentle hand on her wrist as they walked. He needed the assurance that she was there, that she was safe.

She followed, letting him take the lead, slightly unsettled by how well he knew the way to her house. Part of her still didn’t believe him. But then again, she had just seen a man change into a dog or… wolf maybe, and she couldn’t explain that. She had never seen him before and yet he knew her dog, he knew where she lived, he had saved her. She wasn’t 100% sure, but something told her to trust him.

When they got to her house, she let them in and Chan pulled her inside, locking the door behind them before tucking her behind him as he scanned the room and tested the air inside the house for anything amiss. When he was satisfied that it was safe, he stepped further into the living room and headed towards the bathroom to care for his arm. He really knows where everything is, she thought as she watched him head there without hesitation. Stepping up to the sink he started running warm water, dipping his arm under the spigot to rinse it. He hissed as the water hit the wound, a tingling pain shooting outwards from it.

“Here,” she stepped up beside him, dampening her hands and lathering them so she could gently wash his wound. Chan sucked in a breath between his teeth at the sting. “Sorry,” she said softly.

“No, it’s okay,” he assured her. “I appreciate you helping me. I owe you my life twice over now.”

“Seems like both times it was because of me anyway so…” she didn’t meet his eyes, focusing on what her hands were doing.

“It’s not your fault,” Chan soothed. “We should have gotten him out of here long ago. He just… he keeps slipping away.”

“So what are you?” She asked as she patted his skin dry with a towel. 

“Werewolf,” he replied softly. “But I won’t hurt you.”

She nodded and pulled some gauze and tape out of the cabinet behind her. Kneeling down in front of him as he sat on the toilet, she spread some anti-infection cream over one of the wounds before putting gauze over it and taping it down. She did the same with the other side, then wrapped both with a sports wrap to keep it secure on his arm.

“What’s your name?” She asked, finally looking up at him.

“Chan,” he replied gently, reaching out to cup her cheek. “My name is Chan.”

“That fits better than Buck,” she gave him a nervous smile and laugh.

“God I love hearing my name on your lips,” he admitted. He leaned forward hesitantly, giving her a chance to pull away, taking her lips with a gentle firmness. She tasted like heaven, even better than he had dreamed those nights when he lay beside her in bed pretending to be her pet.

What am I doing, she asked herself, feeling a fuzzy, intoxication filling her brain as his lips pressed against hers. His tongue darted out against her bottom lip, begging her to open to him. Why did he taste so good, she wondered as she shivered under his touch. He was hardly the first guy she had kissed but he felt different and she didn’t understand it. She didn’t know him at all, despite the fact he seemed to have been living in her house for months.

“Love, I… I need,” Chan pulled back and stepped away from her. “We need to talk.”

“Sorry,” she leaned back, not meeting his eyes, wiping her lips to try and erase the distracting sensations.

“No, don’t apologize,” he soothed, reaching out to her. “I just need—” he broke off. “I need you to understand.”

“What do I need to understand?” she asked him, frustration coursing through her.

“You’re mine,” he said, taking her face in his hands. “I knew it the moment I saw you that you were supposed to be mine. I protect what’s mine. But I need you to choose me. I can wait. I can send someone else to stay here and protect you. Just… I need it to be your choice because once I have you. I’m not letting you go.”

She should have been afraid, she should have made him leave and run as far as she could as fast as she could. But something in her trusted him. No that wasn’t strong enough. Something said he was right, they were a part of each other.

“Okay,” she nodded as much as she could, still restricted by his hands on her face.

“What?” He asked, his eyes searching hers, trying to divine what she was saying.

“I understand,” Her hands came up to loosely grip his wrists, guiding his hands down from her face. She leaned forward, bringing her lips to his.

“Wait,” Chan took a step back, having to use all his willpower to do so. “You’re sure?” She nodded and his will broke. It had taken so much of him to pull away, to do the right thing. He hadn’t expected her to accept him and what he was. With a desperate hunger, he smashed his lips into hers as he lifted her and carried her to the bedroom. He already knew the place well enough he didn’t have to take his lips from hers as he took them both to her room. He tossed her onto the bed and crawled in over her, pressing her into the mattress with his body. He was pure muscle as he pressed himself against her, she could feel it even through the odd mismatched clothing he was still wearing.

“Chan,” she breathed when he shifted to kiss along her cheek.

“Say it again,” he groaned, grinding himself against her. “Say my name.”

“Chan,” her hand tangled in his hair, holding him close. He pulled back, only long enough to strip off the shirt and to slip the borrowed jeans off his hips. He covered her still clothed body with his, drawing her arms around his neck. She moaned underneath him, parting her thighs to let him settle between them.

“I think I’m a little overdressed,” she pointed out.

“I can fix that,” he grinned, rolling them both over. With hurried hands he pulled off her shirt and unhooked her bra before sliding it off her arms and tossing it across the room. His pupils widened as he took in her bare breasts. They looked soft and inviting and he couldn’t stop himself from reaching out to cup them. She giggled and covered his hands with hers. Sliding backwards off him, she unfastened her jeans and stepped out of them.

“God, you’re beautiful,” Chan propped himself up on his elbows and took all of her in with his gaze. Her hands lifted to cover herself and he sat up, grabbing her wrists to stop her. “Don’t hide…” he blushed slightly as he admitted it, “You’re so beautiful.” He pulled her down to straddle him, running his hand over her waist and thighs.

She leaned down, bringing her lips to his as his hands wandered over her body. He had thought about this moment for months. Being so near her and having her not notice him, not see him had been killing him. So close, yet so far. Every night when she changed for bed, he had done his best not to stare as she stripped and put on her pajamas, only peeking a few times. Everytime she wrapped her arms around him and cuddled into his fur as she went to sleep. He had wanted to change, to confess, to throw himself on her.

Now he had her holding him as his human hands wandered over her soft curves and it was even better than he had dreamed. She smelled like heaven. Like the forest in summer and fields of wildflowers. He wanted to take her in every way possible. Kissing along the side of her neck, he buried his face in her shoulder, pressing her body against his tightly. He wanted to taste her, to feel her flesh in his mouth, to see if she tasted as sweet as she smelled.

He knew why. It wasn’t that he wanted to eat her. The bite would mark her as his to any other wolf that might cross her path. It would meld them together according to their customs and the rules of the pack. The mark would claim her as his alone and give her the protection of the pack.

Breathing deeply, he fought the urge. He needed to do this right. I’m not an animal, he reminded himself, rolling over and moving them both to the center of the bed. Her pleasure had to come first.

“Close your eyes,” he commanded softly. “I just want you to feel me.” She looked into his eyes for a second before nodding and closing her eyes as she laid on the bed beside him. Kissing her lips, he tasted her with a slow and lazy sense of leisure, reminding them both they had all night. He licked and nibbled at her lower lip, letting out an involuntary whine as he asked her to open to him. She parted her lips and let him in, still allowing him to set the pace, to guide her. His tongue thrust into her mouth with a hungry confidence. He devoured her like a sweet dessert, enjoying her taste with a slow deliberation. As he did, one hand played lightly over her chest and collarbone. His touch was as light a feather, teasing her with the contrast of sensations.

Leaving her lips, he slid himself down her body, dragging his lips and tongue over her neck to the center of her chest. He could hear her heart beating under her delicate rib cage, fluttering like a wounded bird. The sound stirred the animal inside him. Was she afraid? Her scent tickled his nose telling him that she was mostly aroused but underneath it was a faint sliver of fear. It wasn’t a fear of him, or at least not a real fear of him. It was the type of fear that makes a rollercoaster fun or that tickles your stomach when you stand near the precipice of a mountain and take in the wonder of the view. That frisson of a potential danger that was entirely unlikely, but not impossible. Looking up her body, he saw her bite her lip in anticipation of… something, of him.

He slid between her legs and moved lower on her body. He kissed and nipped at the flesh of her belly; so soft and vulnerable. The wolf in him loved that she trusted his teeth there. His wolf could have ripped that flesh with such ease and the fact that she trusted him like this made pleasure rippled through him. Moving lower, he settled himself between her thighs, lifting her legs to rest on his shoulders.

“Can I taste you?” He asked, nuzzling against her inner thigh.

“Yes,” she nodded, squeezing her eyes tightly as her hands fisted around the blanket beneath her.

“Show me what you like,” he instructed, licking a line up the slit of her body. “Let me know how to please you.” She nodded, her hands fidgeting with anticipation. “Baby girl, you can look at me now.”

Opening her eyes, she looked down the line of her body to see his hungry eyes fixed on her. Chan’s hand reached up to take hers as he held her hips down with the other, keeping eye contact as he made a testing thrust of his tongue into her. She gasped and squeezed his hand. Satisfaction settled in his chest and he threw himself into pleasing her as he read her body. He licked and nipped and sucked at her until she came apart underneath him with a strangled cry. She was beautiful and he had never felt as powerful as he did in that moment.

He needed to take her, to fill her with his seed until he was sure she would bare his child. An image of her, round with child, floated through his mind. Yes, the wolf inside him growled, take her. Chan slid up her body and positioned himself at her entrance as he pulled her into a kiss. She could taste herself on him as he stole her breath.

“Are you ready for me, baby girl?” He asked, brushing hair off her face.

“Yes,” she nodded, eyes hazy as she looked up at him. “Please, I want you in me.”

“I would give you anything you asked for,” He admitted, coaxing her thighs around his hips. “Have you… done this before?”

“Yeah,” she assured him. “Don’t worry.”

“Okay,” he nodded, a little relieved he wouldn’t have to hold back. Holding her face in his hands, he looked into her eyes as he curled his hips into hers with a slow deliberation. He watched as her face filled with wonder at the feel of his invasion. When he was finally seated fully inside her, he paused, taking a moment to enjoy the way her body stretched to accommodate him. It was like she was built to hold him.

“Can I move?” He asked softly, running the pad of his thumb over her cheek.

“God, yes, please,” she nodded, digging her nails into the skin and muscles of his back. Smiling down at her and keeping eye contact, he pulled himself half way out before thrusting back inside her. She sighed at the delicious friction. His body felt so good inside her, felt like it belonged, or perhaps that they were becoming a part of each other. Chan moved slowly, relishing this moment. She shivered, her hands grasping at his wide shoulders as he moved.

“Please,” she said again. “I need more.”

“Anything for you,” he soothed, placing a few kisses across her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. He pulled his hips back and plunged inside her, going as deeply as he could. Setting a steady rhythm, Chan buried his face in her neck as he began to let go and lose himself in the feeling. She filled every sense of his. Her smell, her feel, and the taste of her skin under his lips. Even her pants and moans filled him as they teased his ears in the quiet of the room. Her limbs held him close, gripping him like he was the only thing keeping her from falling. 

Pleasure rose inside him and he knew there was only so long he would last like this. He wanted to feel her come around him, feel her body milk him as she came beneath his touch again. Her heels hooked around the back of his thighs as she arched against him. The slight change in angle let him brush the sensitive spot inside her, making her quiver and gasp.

“Harder, there,” she begged, a desperation growing inside her.

“Are you close,” he questioned, his face tucked in against her neck.

“So close,” she whimpered, her nails raking his spine.

“Cum for me, baby girl,” Chan panted. “I need to hear you cum.” She whined and moved restlessly against him as the warm pleasure pooled in her stomach. He put his lips to the thrumming pulse of her throat.

“Chan,” her voice was barely a whisper when the knot of delight finally snapped inside her. As her body gripped him, he bit the flesh where her neck and shoulders met marking her as his. The shock of pain melded with her orgasm sending a cascade of sensations through her. With a final thrust he came inside her, filling her body with his emissions. He stayed like that until he felt her move restlessly beneath him and only then, reluctantly pulled out and moved to curl up beside her on the bed.

Her hand went to the bite on her neck. It still stung slightly but not nearly as much as she thought it should. Chan splayed a hand over her stomach, rubbing it in small circles.

“Are… are you okay,” he asked, looking at her lovingly as he laid beside her.

“Yes,” she nodded, taking her hand from her neck. “I didn’t expect you to bite me.”

“Just this once,” he promised, pulling himself closer to her. “It marks you as mine, gives you the protection of my pack. You’ll carry a little of my scent now.”

“Oh,” she blushed and looked at him. “Am I supposed to feel different? I don’t feel any different.”

“No,” he chuckled and smiled at her. “It’s something only my kind would notice.” She nodded and laced her fingers with his where they laid on her stomach.

“Did you do it so that he, whoever he is, would know?” She questioned. “Was this all just to, I don’t know, put him off?”

“No, although I would be happy if it did,” He gave her an adoring look. “This was because you were meant to be mine. Meant to be the mother of my babies; to be by my side for as long as we live.”

“So you want children,” she laughed.

“I want to see you filled with my child,” he admitted, his eyes going to where his hand lay on her. “I want to see it grow inside you. I want to raise it with you, watch it grow into someone as beautiful as you are.”

“Someday,” she nodded. “But I’ve been on birth control, so I don’t think we could just yet.”

“The bond,” he explained. “When I claimed you with my mark, it sort of…” he paused, searching for the right wording. “It opens you to me.”

“Oh,” she blinked at him a few times, trying to process what he was saying. “Even if we just… this one time?”

“Maybe,” he furrowed his brow slightly. “If  you don’t want, at least not yet,” sitting up, he moved to help her walk to the bathroom. “We can try to clean you out, maybe prevent it.”

“No, it’s just a lot to adjust to,”  she explained. “A lot has sort of happened since this morning.”

“I know, baby girl,” he laid down again and pulled her into a spooning position against him. “Let’s go to sleep for now and figure out the rest in the morning.”

Over the next few days neither of them left the house. She called in sick to work, not wanting to put either of them in danger by going out to a place he could so easily find and potentially corner her. Even with Changbin there, with so many people and such a big space, it would be possible to miss him, or at the very least, to not notice him until it was too late. Instead his pack mates came over to plan their next move. Chan spent most of his time planning with Minho and Changbin, setting patrol schedules and scout missions for everyone. Hyunjin was assigned the duty to investigate at the hotel and talk to the woman who had been mauled. Maybe it wasn’t a random coincidence that he had picked her, Felix had suggested after their second meeting. After all, if he was just looking to hurt people and just stir up trouble here, why target her? Sure it could have been a coincidence if he had just been foiled and chosen another target, but he hadn’t.

The suggestion had made Chan go cold. It made sense, but what had made him target her? There wasn’t something particularly special about her, except that she was his mate, but even he hadn’t known that yet. Was it possible the loner had some way of knowing even before Chan did? As far as they knew, it wasn’t possible to know but, still the thought lingered.

As the meeting was drawing to a close, Chan’s phone rang. Hyunjin was calling him from the hospital where he had gone to talk to the other victim.

“Chan?” There was a slight edge of panic to Hyunjin’s voice as he spoke.

“What’s the matter?” Chan asked the other boy, worried immediately by his tone.

“She’s… she’s my mate,” Hyunjin whispered into the phone.

“What?” Chan had a sudden sinking feeling in his chest. He stood up, needing to see his mate, to touch her and know that she was there and fine. He found her sitting at the table in the kitchen, snacking on something as she read.

“I’ve never met her before,” Hyunjin started to explain. “But I felt it the moment I walked into her room. She was just lying there, still sleeping, so hurt, and it just hit me. Her scent and just her presence; I know she’s mine.”

“How did he know?” Chan asked, pulling his own mate against him as he spoke.

“I don’t know, but this can’t be a coincidence,” Hyunjin insisted.

“I know,” Chan agreed.

“Look,” Hyunjin sighed. “I can’t leave her alone here. I have to stay for now.” Chan understood, letting him stay with the promise to send someone else to keep watch over her tomorrow so he could get some rest and come back to discuss what to do next.

“I hate this,” Chan said, as he sat at the cafe a block away from the craft store.

“We can hear everything that is happening,” Jisung assured him. “She’ll be fine, but we need him to come out.”

“I know,” He shifted in his seat. “Doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

They spent the afternoon waiting, and waiting, and waiting. Over an open line, Chan, Jisung, Changbin and Jeongin listened as she went about her day like everything was fine and normal. She helped customers, stocked shelves, and worked at the register, all while Chan was on the edge of his chair, waiting for something to happen. But, it seemed, it was all for nothing. The sun set and the store closed and seemingly all was well. She locked the front door and set about closing everything down by herself.

Chan relaxed a little, hearing her calm humming as she closed down the register and counted out the money in the back of the store. After the money was counted and locked in the safe, she just had to make one last pass through of the store to make sure no one had left something behind or left a mess and then she could head home. Over the radio, Changbin and Jeongin started joking around, getting playful after a tense day. Everyone was relaxing, at least until a loud crack broke over the mic followed by her surprised squeal. The jokes stopped and everyone froze.

“I know you all are out there,” the loner’s self-satisfied voice cut through the silence. “Don’t worry. I won’t make her suffer, but sadly, you will.”

Before the words were even finished coming out of the loner’s mouth, Chan was up, running as fast as he could to the store. He had to get in, he had to protect her. Jisung was on his heels as they ran across the street and into the strip mall parking lot.

“Why?” She asked, her voice slightly strained.

“Why should he have you when my mate was stolen from me?” He growled.

“What did they have to do with that?” She asked, keeping him busy for as long as possible. If he was explaining things, he wasn’t killing her.

“Nothing,” he admitted, dragging her towards the back door. “But neither did anyone in the last three territories I went through. This one was the first one that figured out it was me though.”

“What the hell is the matter with you,” she spat. “You think you can take something from others just because it happened to you?”

“Why should I be the only one who has to be alone?” He demanded, pushing her against the wall by her neck.

“The only one,” she scoffed, realizing this was probably not the ideal way to handle this, but she couldn’t help it. “You know most people don’t have some beacon to tell them who they are supposed to be with. Even those who do, people lose the people they love all the time. Car accidents, illness, crime, no one needs your help suffering, you selfish, shitty person.”

“What do you know,” he hissed back. 

“I know that your mate was lucky not to have had to spend a lifetime with someone who would do this,” she challenged. “No one deserves that.”

Shock and rage vied for dominance in his expression as he stared at her. He made a sound of pure rage and pulled back a hand to strike her. Never having been the sort to just lay down and give up, she kicked out catching the side of his knee. It didn’t really hurt him, but it was enough to unbalance him and make him catch himself, giving her the chance to break out of his grip. She knew she wouldn’t get far, he was faster and stronger, so she just tried to get as close as she could to where Chan and the others were. They would come, she had faith.

The loner came up, grabbing her from behind. “I’m glad, even if this is the last thing I do, I’m not just denying him his mate, but I’ll take his child, too.”

On the other side of the glass door, Chan felt half a second of numbing terror. He had to get inside, for both of them. Changbin picked up a part of a broken concrete curb stop and smashed it against the window, cracking the safety glass into a million little pieces, still stuck together by the coating, but weakened. He hit it again, opening a hole the size of a fist, and again, until the tear in the inner plastic layer got bigger. Impatiently, and perhaps a little recklessly, Chan covered his hand with his jacket sleeve and tore at the shattered glass. Finally the hole was big enough and he crawled through onto the display on the other side of the glass. He had to find her.

Their scuffling was audible and he found them quickly, rolling on the floor a few aisles into the store. She had curled into a ball, only moving to thwart his attempts to move her or drag her further to the back of the store. They all leapt on him, pulling him off her and dragging him away before they made sure he could never hurt another person. Chan stayed with her, trying to get her off the floor where she lay. He needed to hold her, make sure she was okay, make sure the loner hadn’t done anything to her that needed an ambulance.

She peeked out from under her arm, checking who it was before throwing herself into his arms. Relief coursed through her like she had never felt before. She breathed his name and threw her hands around his neck. Pulling her to his chest, he held her close for a moment before pulling her back to get a better look at her. Bruises were blooming on her neck and wrists, but that seemed to be the most serious injuries inflicted upon her.

“Baby girl,” he looked into her eyes, trying to find the words to express how sorry he was he hadn’t been there.

“I knew you would come,” she assured him.

“I will always come for you,” he promised, his hand dropping to her stomach. “For both of you. I will always protect my loves with everything I have.” Over the past few days he had been so preoccupied with their hunt and their planning that he hadn’t noticed the subtle change in her scent.

“How do you know,” she shook her head. “I don’t feel any different.”

“Nothing much, just a little change in your scent… hormones and all that,” He smiled and shrugged. It wasn’t really something a person could sense themselves. “Are you happy? I know this has been… too much.”

“I am,” she nodded. “I may not have chosen this way to meet you and fall into your world, but I don’t think I can imagine ending up anywhere else.”

“You’re mine,” he assured her. “And there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do just to see you smile.”

Masterlist

#bang chan #stray kids smut #stray kids imagines #werewolf AU #chan #stray kids #kpop imagines #kpop smut #chan smut #bang chan smut

[icollectyoursins]

Hey there! Congrats on 10 followers, you deserve more!! 💕 Id like to send in a lil request! Reader has to wear a training mask like Joseph, except they're really not coping well at all. But they don't want to seem weak in front of others. Except Joseph and Caesar find them having a freak out one day, and reader feels embarrassed because, well, 2 super hot guys just found them panicking. 🥺 (but then th boys offer some comfort and lovin?)

Eek, thank you. I would gladly write that up for you. Kept it SFW, since there was no specification. Honestly, this kind of works with what’s happening today. I know a lot of people whose anxiety goes off the rails when wearing a face mask (medical or otherwise), so it’s nice to write some comfort for that! Might write some NSFW later for this. We love a Joseph-Caesar double team.

     You knew that your mask was important to your Hamon training, but there was something about it that just felt so... suffocating. Joseph and Caesar find you having a hard time and decide to make you feel a little bit better about yourself, setting aside their competitive sides for just a minute.

Have a character, but no idea? Prompt list here!

Looking for more? Master post here!

WARNINGS: slight panic/anxiety attack, slight claustrophobia, general shit feelings, not established relationships, more like platonic kisses on the head, wholesome friendly kisses.

Word Count: 1158

     This was supposed to be the easy part. Training. It was supposed to be easy! At least compared to the “final” battle you, Joseph Joestar and Caesar Zeppeli were destined to fight in, along with Lisa Lisa, your mentor and at the moment, the worst person in the world for putting on this stupid face mask on you. “It will help you control your breathing, (Y/N).” Yeah, fucking right.

     You were sat on the floor of your room, having fallen off your bed struggling to take this infernal thing off. Tears streamed down your face and off the mask, making a small puddle on the floor. You were so unbelievably done with this stupid training. You didn’t ask for this! You just happened to be one of Joseph’s friends and the absolute asshat dragged you into this. “You’ll do fine! If anyone can take down an army of vampires, it’s me and you!” Was what he said as well as a slew of other compliments that convinced you this would be a good idea. Though, if you had known you would have your breathing, a basic human function, taken away from you, you wouldn’t have done it!

     Oh, if he could see you now. He’d probably laugh and-

     Knock, knock, knock. 

     Great. Just great. Not only were you feeling completely like shit, now you have to somehow clean up the mess you’ve made and then answer the door, somehow making it look like you haven’t been crying since you walked into the room what felt like hours ago.

     “(Y/N)? Is everything alright?” It was Caesar. No. Anyone but Caesar. The last thing you needed was the absolute Adonis of a man pitying you. “Joseph said you rushed off to your room after training, we wanted to make sure you were okay.” We?! Fucking great. 

     “I’m fiiine-” fuck. Your voice cracked. Just what you needed on top of an already shit day. “Just tired, that’s all.” You could feel your face burning red. Why couldn’t there just be a nice, cold, dark hole for you to die in? A hole sounds really nice right about now.

     “(Y/N), I know you’re lying,” Joseph was talking now, “we’re coming in.”

     “No!!” You shouted, shocked by how broken you sounded. “I... I just want to be alone, please,” you shrunk into the side of the bed, “just leave me alone.”

     On the other side of the door Joseph and Caesar exchanged looks of concern. Caesar was about to walk away, thinking it’d be best to leave (Y/N) alone for now and bring it up later, but in typical JoJo fashion, he burst through the door.

     “Joseph!” Caesar snapped. He wasn’t paying attention, rushing over to your small, curled up form. Joseph was about to say some stupid one liner, when he saw your state, then he was on top of you in a minute, asking if you were okay, what happened, saying something about beating up whoever made you cry. Caesar rolled his eyes. “JoJo, stop. Is everything alright (Y/N)?”

     “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” you sniffled. “I just...” you were tempted to tell him what was wrong, but decided against it. You already felt like shit, you don’t need two very attractive men thinking you’re weak. “I needed some time alone.”

     “Are you sure?” Caesar knelt down next to you. You weakly nodded. He stared at you for a minute, considering his options. Then, he shook his head. “We’re not going anywhere, cara. Come here.” Your eyes widened.

     “No, no I’m fine! I don’t want-” Joseph sat on the other side of you, showing a softer side to him as he leans into you, wrapping an arm around you shoulders.

     “What’s wrong, (Y/N)? You can tell us anything,” Caesar pulled you in close to him, Joseph’s hand rubbed your back and you broke. Tears began pouring down your face with no intention of stopping. Caesar soothed you, whispering sweet words in your ear that couldn’t quite hear or understand. 

     Their warmth was calming to you. Joseph got comfortable, cradling you from behind, breath tickling your neck. The three of you sat there until one of them suggested moving to the bed to make you more comfortable. The two of them curled up on either side of you, rubbing the sore parts of your body, bring you back down to earth. 

     “(Y/N), tell us what happened, we’ll help,” Joseph whispers softly. After a deep sigh, you told them what had sent you into a crying frenzy.

     “It’s the mask. I hate it. I feel like I’m suffocating and the longer I wear it, the worse it gets. I just want it off!” New tears fell, you thought you had run out at this point. Caesar kissed your forehead, running his fingers through your hair. Joseph kissed your shoulder, nuzzling into you. If anyone understood how awful the masks were, it was them.

     “We understand,” Caesar said. Joseph nodded in agreement.

     “Yeah, those masks are the worst, it’ll come off soon, don’t worry.”

     “No, it’s not... it’s not like that! It’s different. You were both fine with it, but I... I can’t sleep, I can’t think straight with this thing on my face. I-” breath was suddenly hard to come by for you. 

     They both took a moment to think before Caesar spoke up. “(Y/N), are you perchance claustrophobic? Do you often get anxious when in tight spaces?”

     “No, not that I’ve noticed. It started with the mask, I think,” you said, wiping the tears from your face. “I thought I was doing so well with training, but... the more I train, the more I feel myself slipping and getting worse. I don’t think I’ll ever get the mask off at this point.”

     “(Y/N), there’s no way Lisa Lisa would leave that thing on you, she’s not that cruel.” Joseph sits up, making you miss the warmth on your back. “Besides, you wouldn’t be here if she thought you weren’t strong.” Caesar sat up, bringing you with him then pulling you into him. 

     “Joseph is right, you’re here for a reason. Use this in your training; turn it into a drive to prove to yourself you deserve to be here.” He cupped your face, rubbing your cheek. You leaned into the sweet gesture. Joseph wraps his arms around your waist, leaning his head on your shoulder. “You do deserve to be here, right?”

     You look into his beautiful green eyes, they were so full of love and praise. You nodded your head. They were right. You deserved this; you’re worthy of being here. They kissed your cheeks, a small reminder that you were surrounded by people you loved.

     “Why didn’t you want us here?” You felt yourself shrink again at Joseph’s question. “Were you embarrassed?”

     Meekly, you nodded your head again. They pulled you close, gently squishing you between them. The three of you stayed like this until you fell asleep, content and warm.

#this was really nice to write #caesar zeppeli #joseph joestar #caesar zeppeli x reader #joseph joestar x reader #caesar x reader x joseph #ask #answer #caesar prompts

[rjhpandapaws]

Strictly Professional Feelings

Ch 1: Midlife Change of Pace

There was a list of things Hank assumed he would do once his midlife crisis hit; going back to working a desk job wasn’t one of them. Cole had left for university and the empty house was starting to get to him. A bad case with the DPD a few years back had sent him into an early retirement and now that Cole was out of the house boredom was starting to set in. Not quite the best word for it, but it was the one he chose to use. It sounded better than stir crazy. He had applied to a few places, he needed something to keep him busy that wouldn’t fuck with his injuries. Arkait Medical Enterprises had been the one to respond. It was an office job in the business division, the pay was good and he would have full benefits. It wasn’t too far from the house which was an added bonus, less of his paycheck would be going into his gas tank. He hadn’t worked an office job since his college days, but he was relatively sure the biggest changes would be in the computers themselves. He was probably working for some guy his age that had gotten a lucky break. He would be surrounded by people in their thirties, maybe their forties, but he wouldn’t get his hopes up for that. The usual pecking order was probably still in place, so he would probably be the coffee runner until some unlucky intern was added to the team. He started work on Monday, so he had four days to figure out if he had office clothes. Perks of being a plain clothes detective he supposed.

Four days turned out not to be as much time as he had hoped. He went shopping and bought a few shirts that weren’t as loud as his usual choices and dark jeans. There was no amount of money that could get him into a pair of slacks. Sunday night he did what he could to calm his nerves, short of drinking of course, he didn’t want to be hungover at work tomorrow. Soberly calming his nerves amounted to relaxing with Sumo on the couch. He didn’t normally let the massive dog up on the couch, but tonight was an exception. Monday found him awake before his alarm. He knew he wouldn’t be getting a back to sleep so he rolled out of bade to start the coffee machine and then shower. The one nice thing about Cole being away at university was that he didn’t have to mind his volume all that much. There was no one else here to wake up. Hank took a quick a shower and then got dressed. He decided on glasses since he would be staring at a computer all day and tied his hair back in a loose ponytail to keep it out of his face. he scrolled through the news on his phone while he drank his coffee. He fed Sumo and then left a little earlier than he probably needed to but he wanted to miss the worst of the traffic. This was Detroit after all. The one thing you could count on was that there was going to be traffic, you either left early enough to miss it or you were going to be late. Hank was hoping for the former.

He made it to the office early enough to find a decent place to park. He got out and headed for the building, he had a guest code to use for today. He had a meeting with someone named Connor to get his ID card and such today then he’d be able to work. He has prior office experience, so it would only be a matter of learning his way around the programs they used. That shouldn’t take long, he wasn’t the best with technology, but he was a quick learner. He stepped inside and Stephanie, the receptionist from his interview day waved at him, “It’s good to see you again Hank. Mr. Arkait is in his office on the seventeenth floor. he should be ready for you, so head on up. Have a good day.” “You too Stephanie.” She waved to him as he headed for the bank of elevators. He wondered what Mr. Arkait was like. Those business types tended to be snobbish, or if they were younger, a bit odd. He hit the up button and waited. he supposed he would rather someone like Elijah Kamski, eccentric and somewhat self absorbed, but oddly pleasant. The elevator to his left was the one that opened he walked inside and hit the button for the seventeenth floor. He was on his own until the sixth floor when he was joined by a green eyed brunette who looked like he hadn’t slept a day in his life. He was in business clothes under a hoodie that had seen better days. He hit the button for the eleventh floor.

“You up to see Connor?” The man asked gruffly, “Tell him that twin brother of his is an asshole.” Hank raised an eyebrow but nodded, “If I get the chance I will.” He said with absolutely no intent to do so, “Who should I say is sending the message?” “He’ll know.” The man gruffed again before going quiet and scrolling through his phone. Hank leaned against the wall and did the same. He had no plans of giving Connor the message, he didn’t want to lose his job on the first day of it. Silence floated in the elevator until it chimed for the stranger’s floor. He left without a word and Hank was on his own for the rest of the ride. The elevator chimed for his floor and he put his phone away before he stepped out. He was in a hallway, to the right of him was a conference with glass walls, and on his right was a standard wall with a couple of unmarked doors and your usual scenery paintings. He continued down the hall, he was looking for an office and so far he hadn’t come across one yet. At the end of the hall he found what he was looking for. A closed door with Connor Arkait in plain white script on the outside. This was what he was looking for so he raised his hand and knocked firmly three times.

Hank had assumed ha knew what would be waiting for him on the other side of the door. The bright eyed, curly haired thirty something wasn’t what he had in mind. He was pretty attractive and Hank hadn’t been ready for that. He smiled pleasantly and beckoned him inside, Hank followed without giving it much thought. He was talking on the phone. “Look, Silas, I’ll try and talk to Gavin about not drinking so close to his computer; but your issue kind of lies with Richard. He’s the one that brings him all that coffee.” He sighed quietly, but it was very clear that it was a noise of frustration, “Hank is here, if it’s bothering you this much, you can come up when the meeting is done and we can try and figure something out.” Whatever his companion had said was satisfactory enough because he nodded and hung up before turning the rest of his attention toward Hank. He wasn’t ready to bear the the full wait of those deep brown eyes and did what he could to collect himself. “Sorry about that,” The brunette said as he held his hand out, “My name is Connor, it’s a pleasure to meet you Lieutenant.” “Just Hank is fine. My Lieutenant days are behind me now.” He said as he shook Connor’s hand. Connor gave him another friendly smile and gestured for him to take a seat. Once they were both seated Connor looked through the files on his desk until he came away with what he was looking for. A key card on a lanyard and a name tag that had a magnetic bar along the back of it. “Alright Hank.” He said as he handed them over. “These will get you into the building anytime. They both do the same things so just carry whichever one is easiest.”

Hank nodded as he took them from Connor. He stuck them in his jacket pocket for safe keeping, “Thanks.” Connor nodded and moved on, “You’re on the business office which is on the eleventh floor. You’re in an office rather than the bull pen, so hang a left once you leave the elevator. You’ll be the last door on the right.” Hank nodded along as Connor spoke, “They’ll have the name plate on your door by tomorrow. Silas should be down to help you with your computer in a half hour at most. Any questions?” Hank had a few. Mostly along the lines of how someone who couldn’t be any older than thirty-five at best was the spearhead of a medical company that was rivaled only by CyberLife; but he had the feeling Connor wouldn’t like that. He shook his head, “I’m good, thanks.” “Alright,” Connor said with a nod. “I’m just a call, email, or elevator ride away if you have any questions.” Hank nodded as he stood and made his way for the door, “Thanks for your time Connor.” “No problem Hank.” He got back to work as Hank left. He made his way back toward the bank of elevators again. He was one of three supervisors for the business floor. It would be a nice change of pace. He felt odd, he would be in charge of a group of people he hadn’t met. It didn’t feel like something he had earned, more like he had been slid into a place that wasn’t his. It  would pass soon enough.

The elevator to the far left of the bank opened up just when he was about to press the call button. Two near identical copies of Connor stepped out of it. He found it safe to assume that one of them was Silas, though Hank didn’t have enough confidence to venture a guess as to which one he was. He gave a polite nod as he passed and both of them returned it. He stepped into the elevator and hit the button for the eleventh floor. He figured he could get settled in and then make introductions if he remembered. Computers tended to give him trouble. He didn’t get any company on his ride down. Once he was on the right floor he made his way to his office. He didn’t have that much in the way of things to put on his desk yet. He would bring his bonsai tree tomorrow unless he forgot, and pictures of Cole and Sumo. Just some things to make it a little more comfortable. There wasn’t much for him to do until Silas came down so he opened the messages on his phone to see if he had anything from Cole. He had received several pictures from around the campus, but not much else. He sent back a picture of his office. It was maybe fifteen minutes later when there was a series of rapid knocks at his office door. He stood stiffly, he would need to make some adjustments to that chair, and opened the door. On the other side was one of the doppelgängers from the elevator. Hank stepped out of the way so he could come in. “You’re Hank right?” The Not-Connor asked as he stepped into the elevator.

“You’re Silas I’m guessing.” He responded trying his best to keep out of the way. Silas smiled, “You’re one of the few that can tell us apart?” “I’ll be honest with you, its only because I met with Connor this morning, and he wasn’t wearing glasses.” Hank admitted, “If I were to pass any of you in the hall way I don’t think I would be able to.” Silas laughed as he made his way to the desk, “I’ll take that. Now let’s get you set up. I’ll run you through the programs if you need it, but they’re pretty similar to Microsoft.” “I think I’ll be alright then.” He said as he came to stand beside Silas. “If you need anything I am down on floor six or you can email me.” He woke up the computer and then made room for Hank at the desk, “Your username is just your work email and your temporary password is the number on the back of your nametag. Once you’re logged in feel free to change your password.” Hank nodded and signed himself in. After he had changed his password Silas gave him a quick run through of the programs, it turned out they were a little more different than he had been expecting do he appreciated the help/ Which ones did what, the ones he would use the most, and how to fix common problems. He even wrote the fixes down and put the sticky note on the bottom right corner of his monitor. “That should be everything.” Silas said as he stood up and stretched. “Thanks Silas.” He said as the brunette left. He got a wave in return.

Other than the stranger in the elevator, everyone he had met so far had seemed nice enough. It was definitely a change of pace from the station, less chaotic, and a corner office was better than retirement. It was just a matter of adjusting.

#A Guide to Bad Business Practices #A Guide to Bad Business Practices AU #AGBBP #Strictly Professional Feelings #SPF #HankCon #dbh hank #dbh connor #dbh fic #dbh

[ladyanput]

Seeing Green Ch.11

I gave zero fucks this chapter. I promise I'll make up for it in the next one.

---

    Marinette stared down at her cell phone with a blank look, before she took in a deep breath, raising her gaze to Bruce, who was sitting across the table from her. She and the Waynes were seating in the dining hall, with the kwami from the Miraculous box flying around, exploring everything they could get their tiny hands on.

    “Mr. Wayn- um, Bruce? I was thinking, since you said you were going to get the Justice League in on the entire Paris situation, I want my team in on it too.” Marinette said firmly as Alfred set down a delicate china cup in front of her, filled with fragrant, flowery tea. 

    “You have a team? I thought you just had the pervy cat.” Jason rose a brow, his hand clenched tight around a mug of coffee. He had been tense ever since they had returned to the manor without Eva, but was holding himself together rather well. 

    “Oh, I have three other members in my team. Queen Bee, Viperion, and Ryuko.” Marinette sipped the tea, then hummed in approval. She motioned to Wayzz, who made his way down and indulged himself in some of the tea as well. “They are keeping Paris safe while I’m away. I find it odd, from what they’ve told me there has been no akuma attacks in the city since I left.”

    “Maybe the crazy butterfly man is taking a holiday?” Tim snorted as he downed his coffee as well, ignoring a glare from Damian. “Or maybe he left the country?”

    “Angel, are you sure Paris would be safe if you brought your team here and left the city unattended?” Damian reached over and gently took her hand, lacing their fingers gently. He smiled at her and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “I just mean that, I wouldn’t want anyone hurt.”

    “I’m sure. A lot of things need to be done now, thanks to all that’s happened.” Marinette got to her feet, a determined look on her face, her blue eyes sparking with a fierceness. “I need to find Hawkmoth, I need a stable team and I just want this all over. I mean, first I need to find a new Black Cat holder, then I need to introduce Lady Vixen to the team, and hopefully Alya won’t be akumatized, and-”

    “Miss Marinette.” Alfred quieted her by setting a hand on her shoulder when he noticed the girl had begun to tremble. The older gentleman gave her a kind smile and a gentle pat on the shoulder. “There is no need to fret for now. Just take a deep breath, your parents are on a flight over here, remember? They are due to arrive in a few hours, perhaps you should just take some time to collect yourself? You were just faced through many traumatic incidents in only a short week, so I suggest just laying low for at least a day?”

    “Alfred’s right. If you get too worked up right now, you’re going to overexert yourself, maybe even make rash decisions.” Bruce gave the girl a kind smile, then after a moment of silence, he nodded. “But once your parents are here and settled, you can bring your team here without issue, then we can contact the League. Hawkmoth has tormented Paris long enough and he needs to be dealt with before it gets too far out of control.”

    Marinette visibly relaxed, but then tensed when she heard the sound of someone running. Evangeline appeared in the doorway, clutching the Fox miraculous tightly in her hand and seeming visibly shaking.

    “Eva, what happened, are you okay?” Marinette took a step towards her, but Eva held a hand up, stopping her in her tracks. “Eva?”

    Evangeline was quiet as she went over and embraced Jason tightly, buried her face in his chest and trembled. Jason held her close, concern flickering across his features before he led her out of the room before anyone could say a word.

    Marinette stared after them before she hugged herself tightly. What on earth had happened?

    …

    When Marinette’s parents arrived and rushed to embrace her, the young girl let loose the tears she had been holding in. She wept and sobbed in her mother’s embrace, while her father talked quietly with Bruce, thanking the man for paying for their tickets to get to Gotham.

    “Well I know she would have wanted her family with her after facing such an experience. And the two of you must have been worried sick when you heard that Marinette had gone missing.” Bruce shook Tom’s hand, exchanging a look with Damian as a confused look crossed the parents’ faces.

    “We were never informed. We only heard about it when you called us, Mr. Wayne.” Sabine admitted, fury brimming at the edge of her tone as she spoke. She held her daughter tighter as realization settled in. “We had never been told about the incident with the other villain either.”

    “I-I’m so sorry, Mama, I should have called, I’m so so sorry..” Marinette hiccuped as she tried to wipe away her tears, her nose and eyes red from crying.

    “You mean to tell me Caline never called you? She never once informed anyone of what happened in Gotham?” Evangeline, in a much better state now, looked ready to take something heavy and go beat up one Miss Caline Bustier. “She should have called you the moment she realized Marinette was missing! The moment she knew that your daughter was being held captive with a gun to her head! Tom, Sabine, I’m sorry that I didn’t call.”

    “That’s enough, both of you” Sabine’s firm tone made any more apologies die off both ladies’ lips. “What matters is that Marinette is safe and that horrible boy is in jail. Honestly, I hope his foolish father doesn’t try to turn this around on her.”

    “Knowing Gabriel Agreste, he’ll get his secretary to handle everything while he stays back in his mansion and cries about his missing wife.” Eva commented dryly, crossing her arms and grinning when she heard a giggle leave Marinette’s lips. “Okay, enough of this sappy stuff. I am starving and I think we’ve all cried enough for one day. No one is dead, so let’s get some dinner and talk about our course of action from here, such as getting Marinette home.”

    “But the Wayne Gala!” Marinette blurted out the words before she could stop herself. She suddenly looked sheepish at all of the stares being sent her way, and shifted uncomfortably. “I-it’s in a few days and I was really looking forward to attending. Please? I made Eva and I dresses and everything.”

    “I don’t know…” Tom’s brow furrowed as he didn’t quite grasp why his daughter didn’t want to leave the city where she had faced such horrible things. But when he caught sight of how one of the Wayne boys and his daughter were looking at each other, it clicked, it was the same look he always gave Sabine. The two of them were in love, even if they didn’t realize it yet. “Well… One or two days couldn’t hurt, but afterwards we’re going straight home and contacting the school board about this entire incident. It wouldn’t have happened in the first place if your teacher had been more careful.”

    There were many hums of agreement and Marinette hugged her father tightly, squealing in excitement. She’d get the dream night, one last perfect night with Damian before she had to go home to Paris and deal with the headache that is her class and the torment that is one Lila Rossi.

…

Gabriel frowned as he entered the filthy, disgusting Gotham police station with Natalie. This is why he hated going out in public, people were so disgusting, so sloppy and uncouth. He had to get his son out of here before they all corrupted him.

"Pardon me." Natalie stepped forward towards the reception desk, her face a perfect blank slate as she gazed the woman at the desk now. "We are here to take Adrien Agreste home."

"Are you his legal guardian?" The woman behind the glass rose a brow, before Gabriel stepped forward and showed his ID. The receptionist nodded and pushed a button on the com. "Commissioner, Adrien Agreste's legal guardians are here."

Gabriel felt an irk of irritation as a gruff looking cop stepped through the doors, eyeing the duo before holding out his hand.

"Commissioner Gordon. I take it you're Gabriel Agreste? Sorry that we had to meet under these circumstances." Gordon kept his hand held out, but when he got none in return, he dropped his hand and guided the man back towards the cells, where Adrien was being kept. 

Adrien was found curled up in a corner, looking dazed, his left cheek covered in scratches from Lady Vixen's sharp claws.

"Son, what have you done this time?" Gabriel stepped forward, barely hidden fury being heard in his tone. Adrien raised his gaze and met his father's, allowing Gabriel to see the madness in his eyes.

"Father, I had my Miraculous taken away."

…

Marinette sighed as she stepped into the library and saw Eva sitting in one of the comfy chairs, staring down at her Miraculous with Trixx on her shoulder.

"Evangeline, what happened today?" Marinette stepped forward and nearly froze when Trixx's and Eva's eyes snapped up, both pairs of eyes the same shade of unearthly purple.

"I don't deserve this Miraculous." Eva blurted out, moving to unclasp the necklace, but Marinette quickly moved to stop her, her gut clenching at the sight of the shakiness in Eva's eyes. "Marinette, I'm a loose cannon, I attacked Adrien so easily, I-"

"Why did you, though? I've seen you angry, but never so ready to cause physical harm like that. I mean, it was so out of left field for you." She hugged her friend, giving her back a few gentle pats.

"... My ex boyfriend said the same thing to me. I was trapped because he had me in this horrible abusive relationship and I didn't ever leave because… Because he kept threatening to kill himself." Eva stared down at her trembling hands, before letting out a shaky whimper. "One day I did. And as I was shoving my bags into my car, he came out of the house with a gun. He called me name, put the barrel in his mouth, and-"

Marinette didn't need to know the rest.

"But I saw a therapist and I worked through that shit. He did that to hurt me, to spite me. It wasn't my fault, he would have done anything to control me or to hurt me. So that's why I'm so adamant on you seeing a therapist, sugar cookie." Eva took her hand gently, giving it a squeeze. "It wasn't your fault. It was never your fault, Adrien was bound to do this because no one ever told him no, no one ever taught him right. Yes, like Plagg explained, the Miraculous may have corrupted him, but that shouldn't excuse him from what he did."

Marinette was quiet for a long time, trying to digest those words as she left the library, allowing Trixx to talk to her newfound kit in peace.

Marinette wandered the halls of Wayne Manor, her mind just… Gone. Off trying to process all that had happened to her in only a few days. When she finally came out of her senses, she found herself standing in front of Damian's bedroom door. With a small smile, she knocked.

Damian answered the door, his eyes lit with concern as soon as he realized who it was. But before he could get a word out, Marinette reached up and pulled him down for a soft kiss.

"Thank you. Thank you so much for respecting me." 

"Angel, where did this come from?" Damian let out a surprised laugh as he gathered Marinette close, giving her forehead a soft kiss.

"Today just made me realize that if you find shut that treats you right, you should never let him go." Mari shrugged and smiled, pulling him in for another kiss.

Tim, who decided to exit his bedroom just at that very moment, made a gagging noise and went off to discuss with his brothers that he needed to stop coming across random make out sessions. It was getting utterly ridiculous.

…

Marinette set the Miraculous box down on the coffee table, as the Wayne family watched. She pulled out what looked like a pair of glasses, and smiled as Kaalki gave her a muzzle, then opened up a portal.

Out of the portal stepped Chloé Bourgeois, Luka Couffaine, and Kagami Tsurugi. The trio brightened at the sight of Marinette and rushed forward, old friends hugging onto each other for dear life.

"Are you sure the League will listen this time?" Kagami took a step back, wearily eyeing Bruce Wayne. "They've been ignoring our calls for years."

"They'll listen, we'll make them listen if it's the last thing we do." Marinette said firmly.

Soon the entire team was down in the Bat cave, facing the monitor. Ladybug stood with Ryuko, Queen Bee, Viperion, and Lady Vixen as the Justice League came onto the screen.

She forced a smile as she introduced herself, and fought back tears as she thought of the partner that would never be introduced.

If only she had been stronger, she could have saved him.

Taglist: @realrandomposts @interobanginyourmom @ladybug-182 @ladylb @zalladane @mochinek0 @persephonebutkore @urbanpineapplefarmer @vixen-uchiha @angelofmusickaterinapetrova @thewheezingbubbledragon @northernbluetongue @violatiger8 @thequestionablyhuman @ginamarie1512 @maude-zarella @2sunchild2 @saphiraazure2708 @ayuchan07 @virgil-is-a-cutie @thepeacetea

#Seeing Green #miraculous fic #marinette deserves better

[dazed--xx]

Alone

REQUEST: *Hi see you mentioned about story requests. I'm having a hard time since I'm currently pregnant and my partner walked out on me, so could you do one when Jungkook where I meet Jungkook and he helps me raise the baby please*

Summary:  “I'm pregnant Jungkook.” the line goes dead silent “look before you say anything, no I wasn’t hiding this from you and I completely understand if you don’t want to talk to me shit I wouldn’t want to talk to me and move on to someone who is not pregnant and going to be having this type of responsibilities-” “Y/N-”

GENRE: Mild-Angst, Fluff

Member: Jungkook x Pregnant!reader

Word count: 2,132 

A/N: so this is literally my first fanfic ever and i hope you guys like it. and to the person that requested this I wanted to tag you because i did post it but i didnt want to kind of call you out online especially since this was based on something you have personally happening to you, trust me pregnancy is scary let alone having to go it alone so if you need someone to talk to im here btw.. but hopefully you guys like this it was pretty good i wanna post a couple of requests a day since i banged this out as quickly as i did im taking more requests just inbox me or go to my ask let me know if you want your name attached to the request and i will send everyone that i know requested a specific story i will tag and send it to you so you know it is done but without further ado ALONE

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“Where are you going? Do you really expect me to do this alone?” I shouted to the already abandoned house. A swell in my throat rises and I can't breathe. My body shakes as the tears take over. I fall to my knees running my hand over my stomach. “Don’t you worry baby; Daddy will be back he loves you I promise” I say to the life growing within my womb. 

The warmth from the comforter consumes me as I awaken with dried tears in my eyes. My heart aches as I remember the events from the past 12 hours. The thick silence takes hold of my heart and it begins racing. My heart beat sounding as if it is being played on a speaker the size of a skyscraper. Feeling the bile rise in my throat, rushing to the bathroom, I empty out the contents of my stomach. Tears escape my eyes as I reach out to the void. I'm alone truly.  

My first OBGYN appointment rolls around and my heart is in my stomach. The nurse escorts me in, slowly my feet turn into lead as I drag myself onto the cot in the room and lay back facing the monitor. Once I feel that cool gel upon my stomach, my heart settles and the most beautiful BUMP BUMP BUMP is heard throughout the room. My eyes focus on the image in front of me. “well congrats sweetie you're about 10 weeks, Due September 27. Remember no stress and make sure to take your prenatal. We’ll see you next week” My ultrasound technician announces excitedly. I smile anxious as to what I should do next.  

I make my way to a small café after my appointment wanting a small tea to calm my nerves. Looking around the coffee shop I notice quite the crowd and my panic begins to set in. It feels like I can't breathe while the crowds begin to grow as the café reaches the brink of rush. More and More people pour through the door as my anxiety takes over and I feel the bile rising again, I abandon my spot in line trying to make it to the restroom before I release the contents of my stomach all over the café floor. The restroom door becomes the only thing in sight to me as I dash for it. I reach for the handle and the door opens and I slam into a hard chest and soon I am on the floor.

“HOLY CRAP!!! IM SO SORRY I WAS NOT PAYING ATTENTION” A angelic voice apologized above me. My eyes drift from the floor up to see the most amazing man I've ever seen in my life with his hand out and my voice gets caught in my throat. I stare at him for a while capturing every detail of his face and take his hand. I nod quickly and mutter a fast “Sorry” and dash around the beautiful man and lose myself behind the safety of the door. I was dreading walking back out into the craziness of the café, but excited to see if I could once again get a glimpse of the gorgeous man from before.  

Soon I am back in line and order my tea, when a familiar voice sounds from next to me “You know.... you should let me pay you back for your drink you know...since I hurt you” Shocked I turn my head to see the same beautiful man from before. “Oh, please don’t worry about it I really wasn’t paying attention either it's not a big deal” I smile shyly. “Besides I'm sure you have better things to do with your time than to buy a stranger a drink” He laughs “Honestly, Beautiful, I don’t really have anything to do with my time that doesn’t involve getting to know you” Heat creeps up to my face and I lower my gaze and smile. “I don’t need you to pay me back for my tea for you to be able to get to know me, but unfortunately I gotta go” I say slowly moving past him. “At least let me get your number...please” He asked “You don’t even know my name and you want my number?” “Hey I know what I want and I feel like me knowing your name won't matter much cause I probably won't be calling you anything other than mine” I let out a small giggle “ that was super corny but since you're trying so hard give me your phone” I put my number in his phone and hand it back to him and walk toward the door “By the way my name is Y/N” as I make my exit I hear him shout back “Jungkook!”  

As the weeks pass, I find myself talking more and more to Jungkook. He still hasn’t stopped flirted with me as much as he did that day in the café but we talk everyday about almost everything and I can't help but feel scared to tell him I am having a baby. What would he say? Will he not want to talk to me anymore? Would he not like me as much? A loud RING pulls me out of my thoughts as my phone lights up with Jungkook's name and photo comes up on my screen.  

“Hey, what's up cutie?” He says excitedly  

“Not much, just lying in bed not feeling too good today” I respond pouty  

“Aw, do you need anything? Medicine? I can bring you soup it'll make you feel better I know you said you went out with your friend last night are you hungover?” The worry evident in his voice.

“Um honestly no um I can't drink so I'm definitely not hungover just different I know what it is though I'll be fine” the nervousness in my voice is evident

“what's wrong then beautiful? Is everything okay?” Oh no... not that question. He’s worried and I know he is but I don’t know what to say. I can't stop it the words just rush out of my mouth like the bile I throw up every morning  

“I'm pregnant Jungkook....I'm 14 weeks pregnant” the line goes dead silent “look before you say anything, no I wasn’t hiding this from you and I completely understand if you don’t want to talk to me shit I wouldn’t want to talk to me and move on to someone who is not pregnant and going to be having this type of responsibilities-” “Y/N-” No listen Kookie cause I really like you and I didn’t mean to keep this from you I was just scared that you would hate me” “Y/N-” “I mean I know you just met me a couple weeks ago and it wouldn’t mean much for you to just walk away from this because let's be honest who wants to deal with that-” “Y/N! JUST STOP AND LISTEN PLEASE!” The words stop flowing as quickly as they began.

“Do you think id stop liking you because of the simple fact that you're pregnant, I mean yeah it does suck that you're going to have someone else's baby but I don’t care about that... WAIT! Is that why your ex left?” I stay silent

“Baby....are you there?” He asks worried.

“Baby girl???”  

“Beautiful are you okay? Hello?”

I sniffle “Yeah I’m here sorry” my voice cracks at every word.

“Baby are you crying? Do you need me to get you anything?”  

“No, I'm fine I promise I'm going to go to bed okay? Goodnight handsome I'll talk to you in the morning” “wait what no I'm com-” I cut him off to end the already overwhelming call. My vision blurs as the tears cascade down my face and I let out a harsh sob. I was scared for nothing or he's just too optimistic. A loud knock on the door grabs my attention.  

“who is it?” fear leaking out in my tone. “Baby it's me open up” I hear Jungkook's melodic voice through the door. Quickly I swing the door open to be greeted with the man I've grown so accustomed to in the past few weeks. Taking in the sight of him my heart begins to race as the tears began to no longer form. He reaches his arms around me and pulls me against him. “Baby girl, why didn’t you tell me sooner? You really thought that would make me just leave. How could I do that when in the past few weeks, you’ve stolen my heart” He looks at me and there's a hunger in his eyes as they shift down to my lips. “aww fuck it” he exclaims as his lips capture mine. His arms wrap around my waits as my hands get lost in his soft midnight hair. After a while he pulls away and a small whimper is released from my mouth. “Do you know HOW long I've wanted to do that” he exclaims excitedly with a smile plastered across his face.

After that night Jungkook never left my side, everything I craved he got, Anytime I felt nauseous Jungkook was there.  It became routine with him his calls became more frequent on days he knew I had appointments and he went to every ultrasound. His excitement for my baby was shown one day when I came home from work and my whole apartment was filled top to bottom with diapers bottles and wipes. Jungkook was still too nervous to buy much because he felt he was taking part of the experience from me and the fact that we still don’t know what the baby is yet. As the date rolls around to the appointment it's all Jungkook can talk about. He wants a girl every five seconds he reminds me it's always “Baby do you think the princess will like me? I mean I want her to know I care and that I love you” which is why he was so heartbroken when he could not make it to the gender reveal appointment because of a last-minute practice session. “Please promise to call me right after you find out okay baby?” He begs sadly before he left for the morning.  

After the appointment my heart swelled with joy as I turned into my driveway to see Jungkook's car sitting there. As soon as I unlocked the door, I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around my waist and feel kisses peppered up my neck “Hey, Baby how did your appointment go? How are you feeling?” he says in-between kisses. A blush creeps up onto my face “Yeah, it went great baby is a growing good and healthy, so I have to tell you something” I state biting my bottom lip and looking toward the ground.

“Oh god what's wrong? Is our princess okay?” his use of the word our makes my heart skip a beat “OUR? And the baby is fine....” I look at him pointedly and his hand runs through his hair as his face turns beet red as he slowly stutters out “I mean....um... I'm sorry I didn’t mean to just assume that you wanted me involved but it's so hard not to be when I'm so in love with you that I don’t care if I wasn’t the one that got you pregnant that’s my baby and you’re my girl so yeah our.... so, what is you have to tell me?” I kiss him softly at his words. I beam at him “You're literally so amazing I can't believe you would even consider any of this I know it's a lot to ask for someone to be involved with someone who is pregnant and all I appreciate it baby BUT unfortunately it's not a princess we got blessed with, handsome” as I put his hand on my stomach and his face twists into confusion “what do you-WAIT! IT’S A BOY? FORREAL? IT’S A BOY?” the smile cannot be contained on his face as he comes to the realization.

"Yes, it’s a boy” I state as Jungkook lifts and twirls me around I laugh.

Jungkook happily exclaims “Oh my god, I'm gonna have a son.” Jungkook drops to his knees and places his hand on my stomach and softly speaks “Hey handsome, its daddy, no I'm not your real daddy baby but I'm going to love you and your mommy like I am. I can't imagine a world without you I can't wait to meet you”

I stand there smiling knowing.......Jungkook won’t ever leave me alone  

#bts imagines #btsjungkook #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #bts angst #bts fluff #bts request #bts x reader

[ashintheairlikesnow]

He Could Scream: Kauri

CW: Electric shock treatment, lab whump dehumanization, pet whump, referenced past dubcon/noncon, referenced drugging, abusive relationship (from abused person’s POV)

Immediately follows The Surgery

Tagging: @maybeawhumpblog, @pepperonyscience, @haro-whumps, @burtlederp, @18-toe-beans, @finder-of-rings, @whump-chains, @giggly-evil-puppy, @whimpers-and-whumpers @whump-it, @lumpofwhump, @pumpkinthefangirl​

“Okay, little man,” Tyler says, a bright, pleased smile on his face. He isn’t wearing his long white coat, today, just a simple button-up shirt with a starched collar and nice dress pants. There’s a little ID card hanging on a metal clip off his shirt pocket, a tiny little rectangular photo of Tyler smiling bright and cheerful against a plain blue background.

The smile is always the same.

Kauri spent four days in the recovery room - he could track days in there, the nurse named Bobbie checked on him five times every day every few hours, and Kauri had grasped onto that much control and information and held tight - and then it was back to the same place, white walls and 162 white tiles. Irregular feedings, 

Except in moments like this one, when they bring him out to test the product.

“Hey.” Fingers snap just under his nose and Kauri jumps, blinking rapidly, pulled from his thoughts. “Hey, bud, you need to pay attention.”

Kauri stares at him with red-rimmed eyes, feeling emptied out, like a cup full of water that they had poured and poured - and still they searched for one more drop. After a second, he slowly nods. “I’m, I’m paying attention, sir,” He says softly, sitting on the examination table feeling the little paper crackle underneath him as he shifts around.

“Hey, I’m not a handler, man. You can just call me Tyler.” 

“Um…” 

Tyler smiles at him expectantly, and Kauri still fights the urge to smile back automatically. Tyler is always smiling - sometimes bright and cheerful and proud like now, sometimes nervous and like he’s hiding fear, sometimes a smile that is blank and empty when the Director comes to see how the tests are going.

When the Director comes, she puts on those blue gloves and touches the red, irritated healing skin around the new things they’ve put into him. Sometimes she pushes hard into the stitches and nearly breaks them, and he sees Del wincing just behind her, but no one says a word to the Director.

When he cries out, she presses harder. If Kauri takes all her pressing and prodding without a flinch, she pulls back and praises him. 

He is starting to hate the words good boy. 

“Try it for me,” Tyler encourages him, soothingly. He puts a hand on either side of Kauri’s face and shakes his head a little, back and forth. “Come on, kiddo.”

“... Okay,” Kauri says, finally, wanting to cringe back and away but he can’t. “Um. Tyler.” 

“Good, great. I know this part’s not much fun, ‘898, I get it, but you’ve done so well up until now.” Tyler ruffles his hair and Kauri’s eyes flutter closed involuntarily - it feels good, he can’t help it. He doesn’t want the touch to feel good, but it does.

Because of them. It’s because of people like Tyler - because people like Tyler used other people like me, a long time ago, to find out how to make us different people than we used to be. They took all those things they learned and put them into me, to make me like this.

Tyler’s wide bright smile, flashing teeth, his long hair pulled back in its usual bun against the nape of his neck, the way he’s rubbing his hands together - it’s all a blur of things Kauri can’t quite focus on. His shoulders keep jumping, jerking him forwards without his consent. Fingers twitch and when they try to have him hold a pen it just drops, again and again and again.

When he was trained the first time, they trained him to be scared of holding pens - his hands shook when he tried, he couldn’t get a good grip.

It’s worse now. 

Kauri wonders if the shaking will ever fully stop.

 “We’re going to take things nice and slow today. This is all going on record for the Director, so you really need to work hard for me. Got it?” Tyler tilts his chin up and Kauri blinks at him, nodding slowly, his eyes skimming to the camera fixed in the corner near the ceiling, the big black circle that hangs down from the ceiling tiles. Staring, staring, staring.

They will tape his screaming. People like Tyler will study it. And then they’ll do it to someone else, too - some other Box Boy - over and over and over again-

Stop thinking. Get through this and go home. Once they’re done with tests, Owen will take you home, you’ll go home. 

Thinking of Owen brings new pain, different pain - a twist inside him because going home isn’t any better, is it? If he goes home, Owen will have the little button they push to hurt him. Owen, who put his hands on his neck and pushed him onto his stomach on the floor next to the couch… he’ll have a new way to hurt him when he’s angry, and he had promised to never, ever hurt him like this.

Kauri swallows back the noise he wants to make, low and broken. 

“Okay.” Tyler turns back to look up at the camera, holding up one hand to count down from five. Kauri watches, feeling dull and far away from himself. 

Five… four… three… two… one…

“Disciplinary implant with electrical output,” Tyler says to the camera, his voice dropping from its usual good cheer to serious, and Kauri stares at the neatly twisted bun of hair on the back of his neck. “This is subject eight to receive the implants and the first to show success afterward. Subject is number Six-Four-Five-Eight-Nine-Eight, known by owner as Kauri, spelled K-A-U-R-I.” Tyler glances back at him. “Remind me to tell your owner sometime that ‘kauri’ is actually a whole word with a pronunciation, and what he calls you ain’t it.”

Kauri doesn’t say anything - just drops his eyes down to the ground - and after a beat, Tyler shrugs and turns back to the camera. 

“Guess the owner’s never spent time ‘Down Undah’,” Tyler says with a cheerful, absolutely awful accent that Kauri doesn’t recognize and can’t place. Then he pauses. “Wait. Is New Zealand still Down Under? Shit. Aren’t those two places close to each other? I feel like… Australia’s probably pretty close… oh shit, I have no fucking clue what distance is like over there. Huh. I probably should have paid more attention in, like, geography or whatever. I’m guessing watching that show with the hot mermaids doesn’t count as studying New Zealand…” His voice trails off. Then snaps back up at the camera. “Well, shit, that’s a bad take. Okay. One more time.” Tyler sighs, holds up five fingers to the camera, starts counting again.

Kauri wonders exactly how Tyler became a scientist - or if he’s really something else entirely, and they put a white coat on him and called him a scientist to hide what he really is, what he really does, in his work on Kauri and the others like him.

Five… four… three… two… one…

“Disciplinary implant with electrical output,” Tyler repeats, in the same serious, professional voice, and Kauri doesn’t move - doesn’t even swing his legs - he just stares down at the floor and waits for his little speech to finish, for the pain to start again. 

“We’ve been working with this subject during post-op and currently to set the parameters of the implant as per the owner’s instructions,” Tyler says, moving back to stand right next to where Kauri sits on the examination table even as he pitches his voice for the camera in the ceiling, giving it the occasional glance with his head slightly tilted. Angled, Kauri thinks - he wants to look good on the camera.

“Main parameter is successfully set. Example #1 is prepared. 645898, please give your attention to the board on the wall.”

Kauri tenses, blue eyes flaring just a little.

He hates this test.

“Come on, little man,” Tyler says softly, encouragingly, and puts a hand on Kauri’s back, rubbing soothing circles that make his skin crawl and wish for more all at once. “You can do this for us, okay? Just be really good for me. I really need this promotion.”

I really need you to have not torn my skin open and made me watch you do it, but here we are.

The wall is crumbling inside Kauri’s mind, and he doesn’t even try to put the pieces back in any longer. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter if he remembers things, if he gets angry inside, if Owen notices. He’s controlled, now. Owen will make sure he can’t read, or send a message, ever… ever again. 

They don’t even care enough to erase it all any longer, because they don’t have to. He can be angry all he wants - he’ll still be helpless.

Tyler’s hand slides up to the back of his neck, lays heavy there and clammy. His thumb presses into the side of Kauri’s neck and Kauri shudders and raises his eyes.

“Good boy, ‘898,” Tyler murmurs, and Kauri bites down on his lower lip until it hurts.

There’s a large white dry-erase board with black letters written on it hung on the wall opposite from the exam table Kauri is sitting on. When they’d brought him in here, Tyler and Delevigne had talked about how the computer had chosen randomized words based on Kauri’s life before. 

What was my life before? Why does a computer get to know and I don’t?

Kauri’s eyes land on the whiteboard, try briefly to focus on METAPHOR in Tyler’s thick scrawl. As soon as the black marks coalesced into a word, the fire lit his nerves again.

Kauri jerked forwards, crying out helplessly - it never mattered how many times they practiced, he always cried out - and Tyler’s hand tightened on the back of his neck, pulling him back.

Kauri went rigid, tears in his eyes. “Pl-please,” He breathes, in the stammer, the shock-speech the handlers call it and laugh at him. “Please, m-make it, make it st-stop, Tyler, please-”

“Look away from the word, buddy,” Tyler says, unperturbed, watching Kauri’s face. “That’s all you have to do, is drop your eyes.”

Kauri tries but he can’t, every muscle is locked against the electricity. His whimpers become choked-off sobs as tears flood his eyes, until finally the words blur enough to be unrecognizable.

The pain stops, and Kauri can finally lower his eyes. He tries to breathe through the aftershocks, curling his hands into fists to keep them from twitching and shaking too much. Tyler’s hand never leaves his neck, presses against it like a weight.

“Subject is exposed to shock as soon as focus on words is registered,” Tyler says to the camera, and the smile is hinting at the corners of his mouth again. “Subject shows marked reluctance to engage with text even when given a direct order, as the subject is aware of the consequences if he does so. We’ll do one more, 645898.”

Kauri jerks in a breath and nods quickly, feeling his curls starting to stick to the cold sweat that’s broken out across his body, the way his thin white trainee T-shirt sticks to the sweat on his back. The recirculated air washes across his arms, his bare legs and feet, and he starts to shiver. He can hardly tell the difference between the shivers from cold and the muscle shakes from the electric shock.

The little circles - the shock implants - feel hot, like when he would sit on Owen’s balcony in the sunlight too long and the warmth of the sun turned to an uncomfortable, prickling burn. When he looks down, he can just see them, glowing slightly at the bottom of his vision. Can see the stitches, the skin around them red and irritated, that travel in a perfect line from his right shoulder to the center of his chest.

Tyler steps away from him and walks across the room. Kauri keeps his head down and watches from under his dark eyelashes as the word Tyler had written is erased with the little black eraser. Tyler checks a card he pulls from his pocket and writes something new. Kauri drops his eyes so he won’t look at the word a single second longer than he has to - aware, with a twist of disgusted fear inside of him, that that’s the response he’s supposed to have.

The headaches come and go, as memories break free or sink back under the fog in his head, but they don’t care about the memories anymore. 

They don’t care what he knows.

Because they know that Kauri is controlled.

“Shit, she’s gonna be so happy,” Tyler murmurs as he goes back to Kauri’s side. “She wanted us to make sure her poor sad sack kid can do this without a memory wipe, and we’re gonna give her a fucking work of art, little man. Okay. Look up.”

They put the implants under his skin.

They record the pain he feels.

They record when he screams.

They will use it to hurt someone after him.

And Tyler will be rewarded for it.

Kauri swallows hard. Tyler slides an arm around his shoulder, leans in close, and takes him by the chin. His sweaty fingers tilt Kauri’s chin up and up and up.

“I said look up, bud,” Tyler says, more forcefully this time.

Kauri’s eyes land on HERO’S JOURNEY but don’t take in that the individual letters even form words before the burn lights him up again and he starts to shake. 

His eyes locked with the pain like every other part of him, and when he sees the words all Kauri can do is wail, half-choked as his muscles are forced into rigidity, a pressure that seems like it might snap bones. He can’t stop looking, he can’t stop, and it won’t stop hurting until he stops looking.

Finally Tyler grabs him by the hair and pushes down, forces his gaze back down to the floor to break his eye contact with the letters. Kauri sobs, tears sliding down his cheeks as he shakes and shakes in Tyler’s arms. His hands won’t close, the fingers keep moving, twitching, jerking little nonsense movements he can’t control. 

“Success,” Tyler says loudly, happily, for the camera. Then he pets through Kauri’s hair, holding him close. Kauri leans against him automatically, eyes blank and unfocused, sobbing hoarsely through a throat that aches from screaming. “End recording. There we go, buddy, there we go. All done for now. All done, little man, all done… there we go, just let it out, there you go… God, I am so grateful for you. You're so lucky, man, we're going to be written into those fucking brochures now, you and me… you’ve done so well and the Director is gonna give me one fuck of a bonus for this, you’ve been so, so good for me, little man, so good…”

Tyler’s fingers card through black curls, scratch just a little into his scalp, run down his neck and then back up again, and Kauri shudders against something new - not the simple I-want-this he has to every touch, but the old disgust he used to feel, used to be able to access. He doesn’t want Tyler to touch him, he doesn’t want to be his very good boy and help him design something terrible to do to someone else, he doesn’t want he doesn’t want he doesn’t want.

He keeps crying, but the tears begin to change. He can feel the sick lurch in his stomach, the way his mouth wanted to pull his lips back into a snarl. He can feel the fight he’d had, a long time ago, before it was all gone. The version of him that had said you can’t take my name from me - but they did… they took his name and they took the fight, too.

They didn’t care if he remembered, any longer. Owen didn’t care what he felt - that he might feel hurt Owen broke his promise, that he might be angry about it. Owen didn’t care.

All Owen cared about was that Kauri could be controlled. 

Punished. Disciplined, for thinking for himself. For having a thought Owen wasn’t in charge of. For doing one single thing just for himself.

Why didn’t you just tie me to the bed? 

Kauri sniffled, and Tyler misunderstood the reason, tightening his arms around him, shushing him in a low soft sincere voice. He thought Kauri was sad - and he was - but the tears weren’t from sadness.

The tears were from anger.

“Take your time,” Tyler whispers into his ear, petting him gently. “Take your time, ‘898. Just breathe, little guy, you’re doing great. We’re going to bring in the computer next, okay?”

Kauri shivers, clenching his eyes shut, feeling a ghost of electricity just thinking about looking at the keyboard again. And they’ll make him - make him look, make him try to type, try to read, and they’ll hurt him every time he does. 

Because he can’t be allowed to read or write, or think for himself, or think at all. Because he has to be locked up, closed up in Owen’s condo, kept like the cat the neighbors owned next door. Because he has to be empty, and pretty. 

Because Owen is jealous of every thought Kauri has that isn’t about him.

“I know it sucks, little dude, I totally get it,” Tyler says, and Kauri wants to spit no you don’t, you don’t understand anything about me, but all he does is miserably nod, allow himself to be held, try to ignore the way his body wants to react even now, even to this, the way it was trained to. “I know. But look - once the Director is happy with the recordings, we’ll get you back home, and your owner will be so happy to see you, right? Because you’ll be totally perfect for him, exactly how he wants you now.”

Why don’t I get to choose how I want me to be? What did I do to deserve having that choice taken away? Why won’t you let me be a person anymore? 

Why can’t Owen just love me back?

Kauri cries in the arms of a scientist who will not stop hurting him and he’s so hurt, and scared, and sad, and mostly he’s so angry he could scream.

#whump #erase to control #lab whump #medical whump #science whump #tw: shock treatment #tw: shock discipline #tw: referenced dubcon #tw: referenced noncon #tw: torture #torture #shock treatment #electroshock #conditioning #conditioned whumpee #touch starved #defiant whumpee #broken whumpee #but also fuck yeah Kauri is starting to get defiance back if you're paying attention #captivity #tw: abusive relationship

[butterbeeryuta]

the ikea guy

ikea employee!yangyang x uni student!reader | oneshot series | fluff, CRACK| 1.9 k

Fuck Kim Doyoung. Fuck his boyfriend. Fuck the weak ass tv rack you bought. Fuck the human’s Id taking control over people. Fuck humanity.

The last thing you wanted to see was your roommate and his boyfriend, who were both barely clothed by the way, trying to fix the already broken tv rack you bought 2 years ago when you moved out of the dorms to a new apartment 8 minutes away from your university. Short story short, the two men were busy doing their shit— which you honestly did not mind since you yourself bring home some guys to, you know, have fun with. But what you could not understand was why they had to do in your living room, against the tv rack. All you could remember was screaming at Doyoung, while Taeyong was there apologising, but you knew that the little devil was internally laughing, finding the entire situation hilarious. Your roommate, on the other hand, was not giving a shit about what you were saying, which was normal for the two of you. Ever since he moved in with you in your second year, both of you had an interesting relationship. Despite your arguments with one another and ‘uncaringness,’ assuming that is a word, the two of you still looked after another. A month or so ago, Doyoung kept you up all night since he was busy having a little drinking party in his room, and his friends were loud. Especially that Jaehyun guy; his laugh alone could honestly wake up the entire neighbourhood. Then again, Doyoung’s laugh is pretty ugly too considering he literally laughs like, ‘ha ha ha ha ha ha.’ I swear, you love Doyoung. Anyways, Doyoung nicely mailed all of your professors the next day that you were feeling unwell, allowing you to stay in and sleep a bit more. Except, he told you about it while you were rushing to the door to run to your lessons. You two were interesting.

Eventually, Doyoung apologised and gave you the money to purchase a better tv rack. You were expecting him to buy it for you, then again, he was Kim fucking Doyoung. He just ain’t like that. So here you were, at motherfucking Ikea. Every child’s nightmare, including yours. Your aim was to find the cheapest tv rack, yet still pretty good in quality. You were not the type to give a damn about the aesthetics and things; if it’s going to help you store your shit, that’s all you needed. Which is probably why you hated furniture shopping, you could never appreciate the so-called ‘beauty’ of it. Following the arrows printed on the grey floor, buying the tv rack was more complex than you thought. There was black, white, yellow, brown, wooden, grey— more colours than you could have ever imagined. You honestly just wanted the cheapest one at this point, forget quality. Everything else was giving you a headache. Without wanting to use more of your brain cells, perhaps for now, socialising will make it less painful, even if you really hated people as of this moment. Looking around for a person wearing the yellow and blue striped shirt with a name tag on, you eventually found the person you were looking for. Not too tall, but he wasn’t short either. Well, at least he won’t be intimidating.

‘Um, excuse me—‘

‘Ma’am the hotdogs and ice cream are available after you purchase your materials at the cashier.’

What. What the fuck?

‘What?’ The guy turned to look towards you, unamused with whatever you currently had to say. Your eyes slightly widened by his appearance, but you swear to your kneecaps if he remains to be like this, you’re going to bite.

‘You’re looking for the food right? Just pay for whatever stuff you have now and—‘

‘Why the hell would I want to buy food here, I just want to know the cheapest tv rack you have in this store’ you interrupted, not willing to hear any of his bullshit, despite him having a pretty face. Now it was his turn to be taken back by what you said. Goodness, how long has this imbecile been working here?

‘Oh um… yeah I don’t know. Maybe if you’ll look around you’ll know?’ Oh you’ve got to be kidding. Not wanting to waste more time on this pretty idiot, you looked at his name-tag to tell off to another Ikea employee. You were not having it today. See you later Yangyang.

—————————————————————————————————

Okay. Apparently people who work in this nightmare of a furniture store take their shit seriously. You just went to another person to complain about Yangyang, and here you are, at the manager’s office. Literally, what the fuck.

‘I would like to apologise on his behalf again, he’s new here. He does not know what exactly he is doing, but I can assure you the rest of the staff here are kind and willing to help. I sincerely apologise that you had to experience such unacceptable behaviour from our staff’ the manager said, bowing his head for the nth time. You honestly wanted to leave and just purchase the tv rack online; you wanted that Ikea guy to not be a dick— that’s why you complained. What you didn’t want is the poor guy to be fired from his job.

‘No, no, please don’t worry. I’m pretty sure he is a good natured person, probably just had a bad day—‘

‘No, that is utter nonsense! We will get this settled now. Please take a seat Ms. ________’ he said, moving his rather puffy face towards the black microphone, pressing the green button with his stubby fingers. Oh no.

‘Liu Yangyang please come to Mr. Park Yoobin’s office. Liu Yangyang please come to Mr. Park Yoobin’s office, now.’ What have I done.

—————————————————————————————————

You were annoyed that you put yourself into this mess. But the guy beside you, if looks could kill, you would have probably woken up in hell by now. You felt bad, you didn’t want this to happen at all. Like you said, you just complained about Yangyang being ‘not helpful’ when you asked him a question to another man that was slightly shorter than you. You expected no reaction at all, you just did it cause you were in a bad mood thanks to Doyoung and his boyfriend. That was of course, until the older man gasped loudly, shocked to hear the words that came out of your mouth. Today was a really bad day.

‘Mr. Liu, I know that this is your second week working here, but that gives no excuse to treat a lovely customer like Ms. ________ poorly. Even if you didn’t know where a certain furniture piece is, you could have made the effort to look for it with her.’ Mr. Park said, his eyebrows furrowing even more as he spoke. It was quite a funny sight from where you were sitting. Then again, this was not a funny situation, you hated every minute of it because not only is it wasting your time, but you could possibly be the reason why this Ikea guy will lose his job.

Yangyang felt pretty guilty for assuming in an instance that you were wanting to ask for food, when you actually had a pretty genuine question. He also felt useless for not helping you effectively, but he didn’t want this job at all. He wanted to work at the cafe near his university, instead of travelling for another 30 minutes just to be in the corner and see people search for furniture to build their so-called ‘dream home.’ Although he did not exactly have anything against an aesthetic appeal or such, he did judge people like that. And little did he know, so were you. Then again, he didn’t exactly care about that at this point. He wanted to stay away from you as soon as possible for putting him in such a position. He already felt bad for not helping you properly, and maybe he somewhat understood why he was sitting in the manager’s office, but literally, what the fuck.

‘Mr. Park, I honestly did not mean to show such disrespect to the customer. I do admit that I was being a know-it-all, thinking that she— what’s your name again?’ He asks me, actually talking to me for the first time since he walked into the room.

‘Um, ________—‘

‘Ms. ________ wanted to go to the food court. And as you said, I have only been here for 2 weeks. I am still unsure of where certain things are, and I perhaps should have helped Ms. ________, so yes, I do sincerely apologise.’ My, my, was he good at saying bullshit.

‘Mr. Liu I appreciate your honesty, and you should really be grateful for Ms. ________ for being so kind, wanting to make sure that nothing happens to you’ the man in front of you said, both his hands interlocking one another as he looks at his employee. And although you were looking at Mr. Park, you certainly did not miss the widening of Yangyang’s eyes. He must be thinking that I was a hypocritical psycho bitch. He isn’t wrong with that at all though.

‘Um, Mr. Park. If you really want to make it up for me, I just really need the tv rack. My roommate is paying for it, so considering that, it really urgent for me to go soon. I’m sure Yangyang was just having a bad day, so please, give the boy a second chance.’ You began packing your things, eventually standing up, not wanting to hear any more rebuttals from the Ikea manager. You had enough.

‘Ms. ________ hold on—‘ And you closed the door. Fucking rat, why couldn’t he leave me alone and deal with his employee privately?

—————————————————————————————————

You finally got the cheapest tv rack available from Ikea, completely contradicting yourself earlier when you said you would’ve rather shopped online. With the amount of cash Doyoung gave you, Ikea was probably a better choice.

‘Hey, you!’ What the fuck?

You turned around, and of course, it was the Ikea guy, but he wasn’t wearing his uniform. And he looked so much more attractive, no matter how much you didn’t want to admit it. With his dyed hair swept to the side and his oversized knit turtle neck, he looked so much… softer and calmer. Well that contrasted with his character. You crossed your arms, waiting for the man to come closer.

‘What was that about? Look, I know I didn’t help you and I do feel quite guilty about it, but was it really that necessary to—‘

‘Before you act like a dick again, I didn’t want it to happen either. I’m a petty ass person, and though it wasn’t mandatory to tell on you, which I’m sorry for by the way, you annoyed me despite how pretty you look. I’m pretty sure you still have your job, and I got my tv rack. So let’s just forget all of this happened, and move on with our petty lives— are you okay? Did I say something wrong’ Why is he looking at me like that?  He just smiled at me, tilting his head slightly, and it’s making you feel warm for some reason.

‘Well since you said that we both live petty lives, and called me pretty so thank you for that, let me take this—‘ he says, tearing the tv rack box open, grabbing one of the rack’s legs, which only made you stand in complete astonishment; what the mcfucking hell was he doing? ‘—and well, somehow find me babe!’ Yangyang shouts, walking away from you quicker and quicker.

‘GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE, AND RETURN MY FUCKING LEG!’

‘By the way, I also think you look pretty!’ He’s worse than Kim Doyoung. He is actually so much worse than Kim Doyoung.

#wayv #liu yangyang #yangyang #hendery #wong kunhang #lucas #wong yukhei #ten #chittaphon leechaiyapornkul #kun #qian kun #winwin is a part of nct #dong sicheng #kim doyoung #doyoung #lee taeyong #taeyong #nct #nct 127 #nct dream #nct u #fluff #crack #a lot of swearing #yangyang x reader #yangyang fic #wayv fic #reader #reader is kinda mean #and reader is also quite an asshole

[sero-sphere]

Fucked Up Love ‘Triangle’

so, i started working on this thing back in april ( hence bakugous birthday and the cherry blossoms ) it just took me a while to edit it. srry

anyways, this is like so self indulgent but w.e, still figured id share!

(f reader x kami x sero, seroxmina) it aint a threesome tho

Word count: 3k

Warnings: Slight angst, finger banging, weed, idk im bad at tagging (also were saying everyone is aged up so y’all can relax. like you were so innocent in h.s)

You were currently huddled up on the hammock with your favorite blanket, as Kaminari gently pushed you back and forth. There was music playing in the background, and a video game that had long been forgotten still displayed on the T.V. It was Friday night, and as usual, you and your friends were all in Seros room smoking together. Bakugou, and Kirishima had already retired to their rooms for the night, so it left just you, Kaminari, Sero, and Mina. The relaxing atmosphere was abruptly interrupted by Mina, who jumped up and startled everyone.

"BITCH, don't forget we’re getting our nails done tomorrow! I'm going to head back to take off my nail polish so it’s easier for them. They always claim they don’t charge extra for that, but I swear I think they do.”

"Ok! Text me!!! I probably will need a wakeup call after tonight!"

"Oh, I bet you will!" Kaminari said with a giggle. 

 "Hush, I'll see you tomorrow cutie!" You said to Mina with a wink. You couldn’t even bat an eyelash before she was skipping down the hall, off to her room for the night.

 "Why don’t you call me cutie?" Kaminari said as he got off from his position on the floor, and motioned for Sero to slide over, so he could claim Mina’s old spot on the bed.

"Because dipshit seems to suit you…"

 "Well she’s not wrong" Sero added, laughing just as hard as you were.

 Kaminari leaned back and sighed. “Whatever, I won’t be such a dipshit after my next study sesh with Yaoyorozu….when was that again?”

 “Tomorrow morning……she literally just texted you like an hour ago to make sure you wouldn’t forget? You’re not helping your case man.” Sero replied as he lit up another blunt and passed it to Kaminari.

 “Oh fuck! You’re right dude. I’m good for tonight I guess, I should head back so that way I don’t oversleep tomorrow…I might not make it in time for tea.” Kaminari was sporting his best puppy dog eyes, and pout. He motioned for you to sit down on the bed, and take his spot. He took one last hit, before he passed it to you and left, ( peering around the corner for Aizawa first ) heading to his room for the night, leaving just you, and Sero behind. 

You were seated over by him on the bed at this point passing the blunt back and forth. Both of you completely zoned out in your own little worlds. Sero leaned over to grab his water that was on the floor beside you. At first you didn’t really notice how close he was, but as he leaned over you again to put it back, his eyes caught yours. His face was so close, moving closer and closer, until it was like the two of you were moving in slow motion. Your body was just moving on its own at this point, and the next thing you knew you were in the middle of a heated makeout session. His hands started to caress your thighs, and you could feel the ever growing situation happening between his legs, his jeans were growing tighter and tighter. Your mouths were still too preoccupied to speak, and your hands still wandered up and down his body. Your fingers moved from underneath his shirt, back towards the straining bulge in his pants. You felt as his fingers moved your panties to the side, and he started to stroke you.

“You’re already so wet….is this ok?”

 You barely managed to mumble back that yes, it was indeed ok, before his mouth was on you again, kissing your neck ever so slowly. You couldn’t tell if it was the weed, or if Sero was really that skilled because not too soon after he got to work, you could feel your body start to tense in pleasure. After you reached your peak you pulled away to speak.

“Thank you Sero…let me…” You reached for the zipper to his jeans when you were both interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Y/N, it's past curfew and I can already smell what you guys have been doing. Go to your room for the night please, and next time you want to indulge in these types of activities, make sure it’s after I've already made my rounds. I’m giving you both the benefit of the doubt by not expelling you.” 

 ------

The next morning you groaned as you heard your phone ringing. You forgot you told Mina you needed a wakeup call.

"Hey. Cutie...dream about me?" You answered as you rolled out of bed to get ready.

"Heh, maybe, you dream about me?"

Your eyes widened, and you pulled your phone away to make sure you heard correctly. The voice on the other end was definitely not Mina. 

"What...Kaminari?"

"Yeah! I figured I'd call and wake you up. You and Mina have a thing and I didn’t want you to oversleep...."

"Thanks! I’m glad you called. I’m assuming you got up in time to study today?" 

"Yup, bright and early! Oh, and Sero told me what happened last night, you got lucky… "

“Wait Sero told you what happened last night?” You were definitely confused. You hadn’t even had a chance to talk to him about it yet and he had already told Kaminari? With your luck the whole class knew by now.

“Yeah, he said you ended up staying for a while, and Aizwawa caught you two smoking while he was making his rounds.”

You were relieved, maybe he didn’t say anything about it after all. You decided to ask just to be sure. “Oh, yeah…that’s all he said?”

Kaminari giggled. “Mhmm, guess we’ll just have to make sure we have Bakubro’s birthday thing a little later tonight.”

"Oh fuck. I completely forgot about his birthday!"

“Well, I didn’t get him anything yet either. Wanna come with me after you have your nails done with Mina? We can get some ice cream from that place you like on the way back?”

"Are you trying to ask me out on a date Kaminari?"

“Maybe…”

 “Took you long enough...”

 ---

By the time you had made your way down stairs after getting ready Mina was already waiting for you.

“Jeez took you forever!” She gave you a once over before she licked her lips and chirped “Wow, you look cute, whose is all that for?” You shot her a look and bumped your hip into hers, as she grasped your arms, and you both made your way out of the dorms.

“Yeah, I uh…. I'm going out with Kaminari after this, I'm a shit friend and forgot it was Bakugous birthday.” She knew just by your lack of eye contact something more was up.

She decided to test the waters. “So Kaminari huh? I knew you liked him, you were low-key jealous when he asked Ibara out at the sports festival.”

“Uhm, I was not!!” By the blush on your cheeks you both knew you were full of shit. “But in the meantime I have a lot to tell you about last night…..”

“Oh yeah, I heard that Aizawa caught you and Sero. You’re lucky you’re not expelled, girl.”

 “Yeah. Well about that……”

You explained everything that had happened to Mina on your walk to the salon. There was a lot to tell. You were so confused. You really had never thought of Sero that way before. Honestly, you really did have a huge crush on Kaminari, but you were sick of him never asking you out. He would flirt with everyone all the time, you were no different, but he never actually asked you out before. You figured there was no way he actually meant it this time. You weren’t sure if it was all just a joke to him. 

Sero was hot adamantly, and clearly you didn’t regret what happened between the two of you, it was just that, even after all that, you still didn’t think you liked him...at least not in a romantic sort of way.

“I think I was just horny more than anything else..” 

Mina laughed. “Yeah, Seros weed has a tendency to do that. That’s how Bakugou and Kirishima finally got together after all…”

 ---

 You and Mina arrived back at the dorms just in time for Kaminaris' study session to be over. Mina caught you as you licked your lips, watching as Denki winked and headed over to greet you.

“Oh, girl, you got it bad...I'll leave you too it..”

“Mina, I swear I'm never going to tell you anything again!”

--

Your ‘date’ with Kaminari went well. He walked you to a nearby shopping center, stopping for drinks along the way, and you both successfully managed to find Bakugou something he wouldn't blow up. On the walk back, Kaminari insisted you both take the long route, which ended up being the best choice. It lead straight through a park where you just so happened to catch the last of the blooming cherry blossom trees.

“Oh, Kami! I’ve never seen the cherry blossoms before...this is amazing!!”

“I told you the extra mile would be worth it!”

With him paying for your drink, and the walk through the park, it was actually starting to feel like a real date. Before you got your hopes up, you decided to ask him. You wanted things to be cleared up between the two of you, so you could then figure out the whole Sero thing.

“Uhm, Kami...is this like…. a real date? I know you said it was, but I didn't know if you were joking or not…”

“I know I joke around alot, but this is real...I mean, it's real to me! Why would you think it wasn't?”

“I dont know, you've just never asked me out before...you've asked plenty of girls...just not me…”

“Yeah, I get it. With them it was easy… I didn't really care if they said no or not...with you, I was nervous….”

So Kaminari did indeed ask you on a real date? You tried to push the whole Sero thing to the back of your brain and forget about it for the time being. You were having a great time with your longtime crush and didn’t want to face the aftermath of last night quite yet.

---

That only worked for so long. As you and Kaminari made your way back into the dorms, you both rounded the corner and ran smack dab into Sero. Who looked like he had seen a ghost. Your memories came flooding back and you immediately glanced down at your feet, hoping Kaminari wouldn’t sense the awkwardness lingering in the air.

 "Hey dude, whats up?"

"Oh hey whats up?" Sero wouldn't even glance in your direction. He seemed to be ignoring you completely.

“Nothing, me and y/n  just went out and got Bakubro some sweet gifts for tonight!”

 “Oh...yeah I forgot about Bakugous birthday...I better go find him something...peace”  Sero chucked up the peace sign and fucked out of there faster than humanly possible.

 “Well that was awkward….I wonder what's up with him?”

 “Yeah I wonder” You managed to mumble back.

---

All night at the party Sero was actively trying to avoid you. All you two did was get a little touchy touchy...it's not like friends weren't allowed to do that or anything. Hell, you and Mina even kissed before. Even you and Kirishima. (maybe that was just on the cheek but still) At one point he went out to smoke on the balcony, you took that as your chance.

"Wow, so I must really be a terrible kisser huh? You've been avoiding me like I have covid or something?"

“Yeah sorry...it's just…” He was cut off by the sound of the sliding door opening.

Mina went to follow you out there, but realized Sero was out there, and turned right back around. He waited awhile to make sure there were going to no more interruptions before he continued.

“It’s just... that shouldn't have happened last night and I'm sorry.”

“It's OK. It’s not like I wasn't willing...you don't have to feel guilty or anything. We're friends Sero I don’t want this to change anything....” You moved closer, and he actually looked at you for the first time all night. You could tell he was feeling guilty about something.

 “That’s the thing...”

 “What's the thing?”

“That we’re friends....”

“Yeah and??”

“And....I have a "friend" who really likes you and I should have been a bro, and fucking respected that. Fuck.” Sero hung his head low, and put out his joint, glancing out into the night sky over the balcony.

“Oh....” The two of you stood there in awkward silence. “Yeah...is that friend Kaminari?”

Sero looked back at you “Maybe….”

 “Well I really like him too...we went out today, and I kinda realized he's even sweeter then I thought.”

 “Oh, then what about last night?” 

“Just because I like him doesn't mean I regret what happened.  Ya know? I can't take it back. I get why it sucks for us though....I didn't really think about what he would say if he found out.” Now it was your turn to sulk.

 “Yeah me either. I don't want to hurt his feelings, or break up the squad.”

The two of you were too wrapped up in your conversation to hear the door open this time. You both jumped when you heard another voice coming from behind you.

“Damn...break up the squad, this sound pretty serious!” It was Denki, as if right on queue, he joined you both outside.

With a quick glance to Sero, the two of you decided it would be best to tell him together. At first he just stood there silent.

 “Denki?” You waved your hand in front of him. With no immediate response, you thought you broke him, your heart fell right into your stomach.

 “You like me?....” He finally managed to mumble out.

“Uhm, yes...I went out on a date with you today didn’t I?”

“But, you also made out with Sero…”

“Uhm...Yes.” You dropped your head low, too afraid to look him in the eyes for this. 

“And he fingered you?” Denki took a step closer to you at this point.

“Mhmm….” You felt so stupid, right when Kaminari decided to finally ask you out, you had to go and do something dumb like hookup with his friend. You were utterly defeated. Until he stepped closer to you and grabbed your chin, making it so you were looking him in the eyes.

“OK.”

 “OK what??” You were confused.

He smiled, and moved a stray strand of hair from your face.“Just OK…” 

Sero decided to speak up. “Uhm Denki? I don't think that's a valid response bro..”

Kaminari turned back towards Sero while you still stood there silent, feeling like you were hit with Todorokis ice. 

“Well ok, it happened...You guys are just friends and I know you wouldn't try to date her or anything.  You like mina anyway…”

“Wait Sero...You like mina???” Hearing that broke you right out of your trance.

“Well now that the cats out of the bag….” Sero sighed.

“What a fucked up love triangle..” Denki muttered.

“More like a square but...” Sero seemed relieved.

You glanced over at Kaminari who seemed a little confused. You leaned in closer to him and whispered  “because they have four sides…”

It was like a lightbulb went off inside his head. “Yeah so, like you guys kissed, and finger banged. No big deal.”

 “You’re not mad?”

 “No...just as long as I get to do that tonight?” He smirked and  walked forward to wrap his arms around you in a hug. “ I just want my turn is all…”

You returned his hug, and shouted as Sero was about to go back inside and leave the two of you there alone.

“Wait!!!I have another problem?” 

Sero stopped. “What’s that?”

“I kinda already told Mina what we did...but she’s not dumb, she knew I liked Kaminari before i even realized it.”

“OK....” Kaminari chimed in, not following where this was going at all.

“OK, so now I know Sero likes her!....And she knows what we did, I don't want her to think he's like off limits or anything…”

 “Oh yeah fuck!” Sero stomped his foot to the ground in frustration.

 “Why is your weed too dank dude? Swear it makes everyone horny as fuck.”

 The two boys stood there smirking at each other while you actually put your brain to work. “Let me think…”

---

 After a few drinks you ran up to Mina. "Hey! So I don't want you to think I'm a total slut or anything… but..."

 "Never girl! You do you!...You and Sero " She stuck her tongue in her cheek and motioned with her hand to make it look like she was doing something else.

“Oh my god Mina! No! So that’s the thing….I like Kami…” 

“I fucking knew you did girl!”

“I told him that, and I told him about me and Sero and he's cool with it.”

 “Oh... So now you're going to get finger banged by sparky?” She took another sip of her drink and looked at you expectantly...she was not going easy on your love life huh?

“That's besides the point..” You joined her in taking another sip.

 “What is your point then chick?”

You decided to finish off your drink before answering her. “I'm not trying give you my seconds or anything... Cause I swear the whole me and Sero was like an unexpected thing....But…”

 “But what!?”

“But I've been told that Sero might have a thing for a certain someone…”

 “Who?”

“You! You dumb ass!”

 “Sero...He likes me?” Mina looked like Kaminari did when he overused his quirk. 

“Yeah! I hope you don't mind. I didn't know that when he had his tongue all up in me yesterday or I wouldn't have done it.”

She thought for a bit before whispering “This is one fucked up love triangle!” 

You just rolled your eyes and watched as she downed the rest of her drink and bounced up off the couch.

 "Where you off to?"

 "Uhm? Do you expect me to just sit here after what you told me? Imma go get me some tape face action!"

 You flopped to the couch laughing "Oh my god Miina...So you're not mad?"

 "You didn't know. Plus you're hot, can't say I wouldn't makeout with you."

 “I’d pay to watch that…” The two of you turned towards the voice that rudely interrupted you. 

“Mineta!! Go away!” You and Mina shouted in unison. 

 Yep this really was just one giant fucked up love “triangle”

#sero x mina #sero x reader #kaminari x reader #bnha x reader #sero hanta #denki kaminari #mina ashido

[the-observant-frisbeetarian]

Chapter 6 - Live Game

Catch Perfect by George deValier

CHAPTER SIX

LIVE GAME: A game with a lot of action, usually with unskilled players, especially maniacs.

Berwald turned to Tino with a silent plea to explain the situation. Party? Tino just mouthed an apology before Iceland hauled him to his feet. "Come on, Fin, let's get ready."

Tino sighed, resigned to his fate. "All right, you want to party. Where are we going?"

Denmark jumped from his chair, pointed at Tino, and started singing. "You! I wanna take you to a gay bar!"

Tino closed his eyes. "Oh, God."

"I wanna take you to a gay bar!"

"Please stop," Tino groaned, putting his hand to his head.

"I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar…"

"What's he on about?" Berwald's eyes narrowed in irritated confusion.

Faeroe looked up from the couch. "I believe he wishes to take you to an all-gentleman's drinking establishment."

"Do ya? A do ya have any money? I wanna spend all your money! At the gay bar, gay bar, gay bar!"

"YES I GET IT!" Tino shouted. "But Ice and I aren't old enough to actually get into a bar, gay or otherwise."

Iceland scoffed dismissively. "Den made us fake IDs months ago. Besides, once I'm done with you, you'll get in anywhere."

Tino edged apprehensively away from Iceland. "What exactly does that mean?"

"I swear," said Norway as he crossed the room, "If either of you say the word 'makeover' I will evict you this second on the grounds of being excessively homosexual."

Denmark grinned manically and directed his demented singing to Norway. "I've got something to put in y-AARGH!"

Norway flexed his fist as Denmark rubbed his arm. "Sweden. You don't need a fake ID, do you." It wasn't a question.

"'course not." Berwald didn't mention that he had not needed to show ID since he was fifteen.

All eyes turned to Berwald. Iceland, Tino, and Denmark leant forward, expectant. Berwald was just confused. "What?"

"All right." Norway narrowed his eyes and folded his arms. "How old are you, Sweden?"

"Tw'nty-three."

Denmark punched the air. "Yes! Under twenty-five, told you! Pay up."

Norway practically growled as he tossed a coin to Denmark. "You got lucky."

Iceland groaned and placed a coin in Denmark's outstretched palm. "Would've sworn thirty, at least."

Berwald frowned. Thirty? Tino grinned delightedly. "Ha! I told you guys he wasn't a middle-aged pervert… Uh, sorry, Berwald."

Berwald just shrugged. His housemates had been taking bets on his age. He wasn't really surprised.

"All right, break it up, move it along," Denmark barked, placing the coins in his pocket. "Sweden, go get changed, you're covered in dirt, it's disgusting. Seriously."

Berwald shook his head. In his idea of a good time, going out on the town with Denmark ranked somewhere between repeatedly smashing his head against the wall and being forced to watch those awful reality shows Greenland and Faeroe lived off. "Thanks, but… I'll give it a miss."

Denmark waved a hand and followed the others up the stairs. "Whatev, you'd cramp my style anyway. Oi Iceland, get back here, you are so not having the bathroom first, you take a fucking month!"

Berwald escaped into the kitchen, which was quickly becoming a sort of hideout for him. At least, it was a safe place to wait until everyone left and he could make his way to his bedroom unhindered. He spent twenty minutes dealing with the mess which only accumulated the minute he finished cleaning it, then decided to busy himself making coffee. He took out a mug, put the jug on the boil, opened the fridge to get the milk, then looked up when Tino walked into the kitchen.

Berwald dropped the milk carton.

"Iceland," Tino explained, his expression slightly bewildered.

"I, um…" Berwald's brain would not work. Tino was dressed… if 'dressed' was even the right word… in a tight purple shirt, Iceland's white boots, and quite possibly the smallest pair of shorts Berwald had ever seen. "I, um… I, um…" Berwald paused, breathed deeply, and focused really, really hard on getting the next sentence out correctly. "I… um." He barely noticed the milk pooling around his feet.

"Come on, Finland!"

Tino looked in the direction of Denmark's voice then back at Berwald pleadingly. "Please come with me!"

"I…" Berwald had absolutely no choice. "Okay."

It took Berwald five minutes to get ready. When he descended into the living room, Tino still looked helplessly lost, Norway stood tapping his foot, Iceland was fussing with Tino's hair, and Greenland and Faroe looked about as stunned as Berwald.

Greenland blinked incredulously up at Tino. "Who did this thing to you?"

Tino looked helplessly down at himself. "I know! I can't go out like this!"

Iceland rolled his eyes. He was dressed practically identical to Tino, though with a blue shirt, and a hell of a lot more eyeliner. "The hell you can't, you're our ticket into the hottest club in town."

"But I... but I look..."

"Fucking perfect, sweetie."

"Come on Ice, can't you do this?"

"I always do it. It's time to pass on my knowledge. Now remember what I told you to say?"

Tino took a deep breath. "Um... can my friends come in too?"

Iceland nodded. "Just like that, with that little tilt of the head. Now bite your lip that way you do. Beautiful."

Just as Berwald was trying to sort out his wildly oscillating and self-sabotaging emotions, he was thrown off guard by Denmark sauntering into the room, wearing a garish red suit and a little hat. Norway sneered at him. "You look like a pimp."

"Yeah, baby." Denmark placed an arm each around Norway and Iceland and grinned widely. "Sup, bitches." Norway stomped on his foot.

Denmark barely noticed. "Gentleman. And now we embark upon the age-old tradition of getting raging drunk in order to forget our problems. Shall we?"

.

The line of people waiting to enter the club stretched halfway down the street. Berwald and his housemates stood in a cluster off to the side, eyeing the security discreetly. "That one," said Iceland, pointing to a bouncer and pushing Tino towards the crowd. "Go, Fin."

Tino, looking slightly confused and a little terrified, pushed his way hesitantly through the crowd to the bouncers on the door. Berwald watched, the back of his neck boiling, as Tino spoke a few inaudible words. Not that he should worry, really; there was no way this was going to work.

But then Tino tilted his head. The bouncer nodded and Tino turned back to the group, smiling and beckoning them forward.

"All riiight!" Denmark cheered, pushing his way through the crowd to the door. "Move it, peasants. Nice one, Fin."

Berwald shot the bouncer a glare as he walked past. The man took a step backwards.

An hour later and Berwald could not remember the last time he had felt so uncomfortable. He was surrounded by a swarming, sweating, undulating mass of humanity, all at varying degrees of intoxication, all reminding Berwald why he absolutely hated nightclubs. He almost found himself looking around for a dirty, discreet back door somewhere - most of these places had games going on if you knew where to find them - but he quelled that notion the second he thought it. What would he even bet with?

Berwald glanced around for his housemates, who were having no problems making themselves at home in the blaring club. Norway had found his way to the bar and was currently knocking back his fourth straight shot of gin. Iceland had found a pole and an appreciative audience. Denmark had found the dance floor - and glowsticks. Only Tino seemed as much at a loss as Berwald, pushing through the massing sea of people around the bar. Almost everyone stared as he passed by, some even whistling, some getting so dangerously close that Berwald had to restrain himself from starting a few stupid, testosterone-laden barroom brawls.

Tino eventually made his way through the thronging mass and laughed up at Berwald. "Gosh, wow. Have you ever seen so many people pressed up like this? We had a dance at my school last year but only like thirty people turned up because everyone went and hung out at the empty lot to drink vodka and make out and look at cars. I would have gone, but I'm just not that interested in cars."

Berwald could not do this. He could not stand here while the most perfect person in the world stood right beside him and laughed like that and came out with those crazy, perfect things he always said. Berwald took a long sip of his beer and focused again on Denmark on the dance floor. Tino followed his gaze, a puzzled expression on his face. "What is he doing?"

"Think he's dancin'," Berwald replied, hoping Tino could hear him over the deafening electronics and thumping beat. He was not good at yelling. "Or, uh... tryin' to."

"He looks like he's having a fit."

"Thought he was," said Berwald. "Was gettin' ready to do CPR. Then he started wavin' the glowsticks so I thought he must be all right."

Tino giggled loudly. "That was funny."

"I was serious." This just made Tino burst into another fit of laughter. Berwald looked at him in confusion.

"Sorry," laughed Tino.

"Y'all right, Tino?" asked Berwald carefully. Tino was acting a little different - he certainly did not seem as nervous as usual.

"Of course! Norway gave me one of these!" Tino grinned, holding up an almost empty bottle of some brightly coloured hideous vodka concoction.

"Ah." Well, that explained it. "Ye should go easy on that."

"Why?"

"It's stronger than it tastes."

Tino waved a hand dismissively. "I'm Finnish, remember? I come from a long line of proud people who can hold their vodka and shoot Russians and sit in saunas for a really, really long time." Tino finished his drink, stumbled, and Berwald almost unconsciously reached out and took his arm. He led him through the crowd to a few couches centred around a low table; Berwald glared at the two men sitting there and they quickly left. Tino barely noticed, just falling heavily onto the couch. Iceland passed by on his way back from the bar and passed Tino a bright purple bottle.

"Ooh." Tino immediately started on the next sugary vodka mixture. Berwald closed his eyes, searched for inner strength, then sat down beside him.

Two drinks later and it was becoming quite clear that Tino was not the best drinker in the world. Berwald was only on his second beer, but used to much stronger. He watched with a mixture of amusement and complete, utter infatuation as Tino waved a bright blue bottle in the air in time with his words. He seemed to be making his way through every colour of the rainbow in vodka form. "And so then, get this, the teacher says that I was totally wrong in my entire interpretation and that there is no way that 'Romeo and Juliet' would ever work during a zombie apocalypse. So, d'you know what I said?"

"No."

Tino raised his drink. "I said, 'screw you!'"

"Really?"

Tino took a sip of vodka and shook his head. "No, not really, but I thought it. I actually said 'okay' and then I just, sort of, sat back down."

Berwald actually had to hold back a burst of laughter. "Well, at least ye thought it."

Tino leant forward with wide, bright, earnest eyes. "Don't you just wish sometimes that you could say what you're really thinking? I always worry that I'm going to upset someone, or make a fool of myself, or that it's going to come out wrong, which it usually does anyway because my brain just never seems to keep up with my mouth, you know what I mean?"

Berwald nodded. He wasn't actually sure he'd even heard Tino, too captivated by those violet eyes. "Sure."

Tino smiled softly. "Berwald, you're a really, really good listener."

"'kay."

"Do you think we're going to lose the house?"

Oh. That Berwald understood. How to answer… Berwald did the way he always did; the only way he really knew how. Honestly. "I don't know."

Tino flopped back against the couch despairingly. "Berwald, what will I do if we get kicked out? I won't have anywhere to go. I'll end up living on the street in a cardboard box. I don't want to live in a cardboard box, Berwald. How will I ever decorate it, nothing goes with that horrible brown colour. Oh my God, and I'll have to wear one of those beanie things with the bobbles on the side! Please don't let that happen to me, Berwald!"

Berwald did not think he could handle this. Tino was so adorable it was killing him. "I won't. Pr'mise I won't."

Tino gave a happy sigh and laid his head on Berwald's shoulder. Berwald took a very long gulp of beer. "That's so nice. You're so nice. What am I going to do with my life, Berwald?

Berwald froze. Oh, no. Drunk talk already. "I'm sure you'll think'f somethin'."

"I'm eighteen, I graduate in a month, and I have no idea what I want to do. Isn't that stupid?"

Berwald was all too aware of Tino's face so close to his. He could almost feel his breath. "No."

Tino waved his drink again as he spoke. "Eduard is going to be a computer whatsit… thing… guy. And Feliks and Toris are both already at college, and… and I just have no idea. I'm not the best at anything. I mean, I can play the piano, but I'm no musical genius. I'm in the soccer team, but I'm no athlete. I get good grades, but I'm never the top of the class. I'm just normal, boring, average."

Berwald scoffed quietly at that. Tino, average? He'd never heard anything so untrue in his entire life. But he did not know how to give compliments, or reassure people, so he simply asked, "Well… what's yer dream?"

Tino was silent for a moment. Berwald started to worry he had been inappropriate, but then Tino hummed thoughtfully. "My dream…"

"Yeah. If ye could have anythin', be anythin'."

"No, that's embarrassing!"

"I won't tell."

Tino lifted his head, looking up with narrow, wary eyes, and Berwald realised that he actually really, really wanted to know. "Promise?"

Berwald nodded. "Pr'mise."

"Well…" Tino seemed to think about answering for a moment. He bit his lip, took a deep breath, then spoke in a rush. "I just want a nice little house with a kid and a fluffy, white dog and a garden and the man of my dreams. I even want the white picket fence." Tino shrugged and looked into his hands. "Pathetic, huh."

Berwald's heart flipped almost painfully in his chest. He really could not handle this. "No. Not't all. Honest. And sweet."

Tino took another long sip of vodka, then pressed his finger to Berwald's lips. "But ssh, I'm not supposed to say that, or want that, because Eduard says that's, like, gender stereotypes and we shouldn't subscribe to those because that just sets our cause back fifty years but I don't even have a cause, I don't even really know what that means, but I think it means I'm supposed to be a lumberjack or something."

Berwald almost laughed again. "A lumb'rjack?"

"Yeah, you know. Tough, rugged. Eats pancakes, I believe. Red flannel is involved."

This time Berwald could not stop it. Tino was too cute, and too random, and Berwald laughed. He quickly broke off when Tino gasped and grabbed his arm. "Berwald!"

"Uh, what?"

"That's the first time I've heard you laugh!"

Berwald wasn't sure whether to feel embarrassed. "Oh."

Tino smiled. "You should do that more often, you're not so scary when you laugh. That was probably a silly thing to say, though, about the lumberjack. I'm glad Denmark didn't hear me say that..."

"Hear you say what?" Berwald was almost knocked sideways as Denmark vaulted the back of the couch and sat heavily between them. "House rule eleven, Sweden."

Berwald had to force himself not to punch Denmark in the jaw. "We're not in th'house," he grunted through gritted teeth.

Denmark eyed him disdainfully. "They still count."

Berwald held Denmark's steely gaze easily. "Is that explicitly stated?"

"I'm sure I could amend the rules to state it." Denmark scornfully articulated every word.

Berwald sneered. "Ye'd have to get a majority vote, wouldn't ye?"

Denmark narrowed his eyes and leant forward until his nose was almost touching Berwald's. "Sometimes, Sweden, I really don't like you very much."

Berwald was about to respond that the feeling was pretty damn mutual when Tino suddenly gasped and bounced on the couch. The music blasted even louder. "Oh, oh! I LOVE this song! Someone dance with me!"

Tino jumped up excitedly and almost ran into Iceland walking back from the bar. Tino took the drinks from Ice, placed them on the small table, and dragged him insistently towards the dance floor.

The song sounded like a thousand Berwald had heard before. But the second Ice and Tino started dancing, the entire club stopped to watch. Berwald had to admit – it was unlike anything he had ever seen. Iceland danced like he was born to do it. He moved effortlessly with the music; arms rising and falling gracefully, hips swaying tightly, his entire body perfectly in tune with the thumping bass and the flowing melody. His eyes, dark and lidded, took in the entire room as he moved with the beat.

But Tino – well. To be fair, impartial, and completely honest – Tino was quite possibly the worst dancer Berwald had ever seen. He started with some strange sort of epileptic shuffle, then moved on to a quite terrifying mixture of line dancing and flamenco, and once the beat started to get going, he simply jumped and down. People were avoiding him on the dance floor. Berwald, however, could not tear his eyes away from the perfect Finn.

"Sweden, you're pretty clueless, aren't you."

Berwald blinked at the intrusion on his thoughts, then practically choked on the audacity of Denmark saying those words to anyone. "Me?"

"Yes, do you see another freakishly tall, clinically pissed off looking Scandinavian nation around here anywhere?"

Berwald was really starting to wonder. "You've got s'rious pr'blems, Denmark."

"And you've got a serious speech impediment, honestly, I don't know what you are saying! No, don't try and repeat it, you'll only hurt yourself. As I was saying, you're clueless. Do you not see how glaringly obvious it is that you are in love with Finland?"

Berwald felt rather ill. How did everyone seem to know this? He was supposed to be good at hiding his emotions, damn it! Why was this the only one he could not hide? He glanced up at Tino, now attempting some kind of Broadway-inspired break-dancing, and realised – he had never felt anything like this. So how could he know how to hide it? Berwald glared at Denmark, calling upon his most intimidating expression. "Don't know what yer talkin' 'bout."

"Sweden, I'll make it simple." Denmark suddenly looked more serious than Berwald had ever seen him. It was jarring. "I've already seen one of my friends hurt. I will not see it happen again. So I swear to you, if you ever do anything to hurt Fin - I will break your fucking teeth."

Berwald paused for a moment. Denmark was serious about this. Maybe, somewhere beneath that mad, bizarre exterior, there really were things that he cared about. Again, Berwald looked up at Tino dancing. He was laughing wildly, jumping like he was in a mosh pit, completely oblivious to Iceland's perfectly smooth technique beside him. His blond hair flew in his beautiful face, his violet eyes flashed brightly; he was a fresh breeze of green grass and brilliant sunshine in a dank, booze-smelling pit.

Berwald glared at Denmark evenly, and replied honestly. "If I ever did anythin' to hurt 'im – I'd let you break more than m'teeth."

Denmark looked taken aback. Just then, Norway fell into the chair opposite. "This place is bullshit. The bastard behind the bar tried to stop serving me."

Denmark leant back and smiled brightly. "What'd you say to that?"

"I looked him in the eye and strongly suggested he reconsider."

"And?"

Norway held up a bottle. "Free drink."

Denmark giggled. "That's my boy."

Berwald again fixed his attention on Tino and Iceland on the dance floor. His view, however, was suddenly obstructed by three young men. The young, bespectacled blond sneered down with folded arms. "Why hello, Denmark! I didn't think the asylum let you out after nightfall!"

It took Berwald only a second to recognise them. Eduard, who had spoken and now looked down disdainfully at Denmark; Feliks, who was paying more attention to his cell phone than anything; and Toris, who looked distinctly uncomfortable. Tino seemed to have noticed at the same time, as he suddenly charged over and shrieked before Denmark had a chance to respond. Berwald winced.

"Oi, Finland!" shouted Denmark, placing a hand to his ear. "I need both my eardrums, you know!"

Tino ignored Denmark and threw his arms around the small group. "My friends! Yay, my friends are here!"

"Hey, Tino," said Eduard. Berwald glared at the boy's arm around Tino's waist. "How did you get in here oh great look your terrifying new housemate is here too…"

Tino laughed and pushed Eduard's shoulder. "Eduard, this is Berwald. Don't be mean."

Eduard smiled very carefully, but it did not reach his eyes. "It's nice to meet you properly, Berwald."

Berwald gritted his teeth and tried to be polite. "Hi." Eduard looked at him as though expecting him to go on. Berwald had no idea what else he was supposed to say.

Thankfully Denmark broke the awkward pause. "Well, well, so Mother Bear has let the Russian cubs out to play!"

Toris clenched his fists and growled angrily. "I. Am. Lithuanian!"

"That's what I said. Russian."

Toris looked like he was going to explode. "I... you... I… I need to go away."

Denmark threw a leg onto the coffee table to prevent Toris' escape, but his eyes were fixed on Eduard. "Estonia! I've told you a hundred times, you can't join Scandinavia, we're full. Go hang out with your Baltic brothers where you belong."

Eduard shook his head in disbelief. "Denmark, I wouldn't live with you if you paid me a thousand bucks a week and worked as my personal slave."

Norway downed the remainder of his drink. "He's broke, and he works for me."

Eduard's lip twisted. "I swear you're just as…"

Denmark sighed loudly. "Estonia, stop begging, please, you're embarrassing yourself."

Eduard pressed his lips together, breathed deeply through his nose, and turned to Tino. "How do you live with him?"

"How d'ye live with Ivan?" No one spoke. It took Berwald a few moments to be sure he was the one who had.

"Yeah," said Denmark finally, realising. He leant forward on the couch and glared indignantly at the three young men. "Yeah! I'm far better than that creepy Russian, at least I'm only fucking one of my minions!"

Despite the thumping music, the atmosphere turned cold and deathly silent. "Excuse me?" Feliks finally looked up from his phone, his hand on his hip and his expression deadly. "But, like, what the shit is that supposed to mean?"

Denmark smirked. "Come off it, Poland. Everyone knows Russia keeps your sweet little asses from being deported, and does what he wants with them in return."

Feliks lost it. Eduard and Toris barely managed to restrain the wild-eyed Pole as he charged. "I'll kill you, Denmark!" Feliks screamed. "I'll totally scratch your fucking eyes out!"

"Try it, sweetheart." Norway stood smoothly and stepped between Feliks and Denmark. "Try it and I will, like, totally rip that pretty little ponytail out of your scalp."

Berwald felt his shoulders tense as he prepared for some sort of eye-scratching, hair-ripping showdown. The tension broke, however, when Tino stumbled over and threw his arm around Norway. "Hey, hey!" Everyone stared as Tino laughed and gestured wildly. "Why can't we all just get along? It's like that song, you know. You know, that song. Berwald, tell them the song."

Berwald tried to sink into the couch. "Um, I… don't know what…"

"Yeah, that one." Tino started to sing tunelessly. "Why can't we all… just get along…" He trailed off, stopped, then glared intently at Eduard. "I don't like you guys fighting. You shouldn't fight, because you're all my friends, and…"

Eduard narrowed his eyes. "Tino, how much have you had to drink?"

Before Tino managed to respond, Iceland walked over and fixed Toris with a deep, bitter glare. Toris took an unsteady step backwards, turned red, and quickly looked away. "This place is tired," said Iceland calmly. "Let's go."

Berwald did not need to be told twice. He grabbed Denmark by the arm, pulled him off the couch, then pushed between Norway, Tino and his friends, sweeping his two housemates towards the exit. Iceland followed of his own accord. Tino shouted back as he was herded towards the door. "I'll call you guys tomorrow! Hey, hey, Feliks bro, tag me on Facebook!"

.

Berwald had learnt, many years earlier, that when some people reached a certain level of intoxication, it was impossible to stop them seeking further chemical stimulation and social interaction. Berwald now realised, as he and his housemates walked down the loud, busy, neon-lit inner city street, that he was currently with four of those people.

"What is their problem? I mean, what is their problem? Do you know what I mean, though? What is their problem?"

"Their problem is you, Den, you stupid bastard."

"No, baby, no, I mean besides me, what is their problem? Ice, man, you got any idea?"

"Their problem is that Ivan has convinced them they're something important and precious and beautiful but what they don't know yet is that one day he is going to rip their hearts out before their eyes, laugh in their faces, and force them to watch as he devours their very souls from a silver platter before washing it down with a glass of their own bitter tears."

"Ooh! Karaoke!"

Berwald turned his stunned gaze from Iceland's rather horrifying monologue, followed Tino's jumpy, excited gesture, then barely had time to keep up as the bouncing Finn took off across the street. The others seemed more than happy to follow Tino into the dark doorway, passing under a brightly flashing sign that read that most evil of all Japanese words: Karaoke. Berwald let out a long, resigned sigh, but had no choice but to follow.

The 'karaoke' bar was nothing but a fairly small, dodgy looking pub, filled with middle aged men who all stopped, turned, and stared at the five new arrivals. The music broke off, the housemates paused, and someone whistled. Denmark raised his fist in a salute. "Rock on." He nudged Iceland. "Hey, Ice, go dance on the bar."

Norway grabbed Iceland by a belt loop when he started to hurry off. "No, Ice." Norway glanced at Berwald. "He has a little trouble with sarcasm when he's drunk."

"Who's being sarcastic?" asked Denmark. Berwald raised his eyes to the ceiling, put a hand to his forehead, and wondered again just what the hell he was doing here.

"Hello!" cried Tino, waving cheerfully at the room in general.

Of course. That's why. Berwald took Tino's arm, put on his intimidation face, and led him to the bar. The music started again - some boring sounding ballad - followed moments later by a bored looking man on stage mumbling into the microphone. The men clustered around the tall tables went back to their drinks. The bartender looked over the bar and eyed the newcomers suspiciously. "You boys lose your way?"

Norway slammed a fifty down on the counter. "Not paying you to talk, bar bitch. Five shots of your strongest."

Denmark leant over Norway's shoulder. "And five beers."

"And five beers," added Norway.

"And some peanuts."

The bartender raised one dark, bushy eyebrow. Norway leant further over the bar. "You heard the man. Peanuts."

The bartender rolled his eyes, spread five shot glasses on the table, and reached for a tall, green bottle. Berwald's eyebrows shot up – this was the last thing any of his housemates needed at this stage. "Maybe that's not th'best…" It was too late. The others reached for the shots and downed them. Denmark cheered, Iceland coughed, and Norway slammed the glass back down on the bar before glaring at the bartender.

"Beer."

"Peanuts!"

Tino stared into his shot glass. "What is this? It tastes like burning liquorice."

"Abs'nthe," said Berwald.

Tino's face brightened "Oh! Like the French poets drank! I've seen the old pictures, I'm supposed to start seeing fairies now, aren't I?"

Iceland snorted. "Been seeing 'em all night, Fin. Here." Iceland passed Tino a beer and Berwald wondered if it would incredibly inappropriate to take it off him. He decided it would be, but was relieved when Tino took one sip and made a face.

"Eurgh, that's horrible. Here, Berwald, you can have it. Hey Norway, Norge, buy me another of those purple ones." Norway did so, and Berwald gritted his teeth.

"Hey Sweden," grinned Denmark, leaning back against the bar. "Why haven't we seen you dance yet? All Swedish men can dance. Get up on the bar with Iceland."

Norway again had to grab Iceland by a belt loop. "Sarcasm, Ice."

Berwald raised an eyebrow. "Is that th'same as all Danish men are unwashed alc'holics?"

Denmark threw back his head and laughed. "And Swedes all talk like this -" Denmark waved his hands in the air. "'I em freekeeshly tall und hef-a noo sense-a ooff hoomuoor. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp!'"

Berwald tried not to roll his eyes. It was only a matter of time before the Swedish Chef jokes. "Sure, 'kay, and Danes're obsessed with bicyclin' and pornography."

"Hey, hey." Denmark raised a finger, a stern expression on his face. "I have never ridden a bicycle in my life. And at least my furniture doesn't all come from IKEA."

"No, it all comes from th'side of th'road."

Iceland whistled. "Ooh, snap." He elbowed Norway. "Isn't this kind of hot?"

"More absinthe!" shouted Norway. "By God, more absinthe."

Berwald shook his head and turned away, only to find that Tino was nowhere to be seen. His stomach dropped to his feet. "Where's Tino?"

Iceland took a sip of beer and pointed. Berwald scanned the crowd before spotting Tino standing near the stage, looking over the karaoke song list and talking animatedly with three large, hairy men dressed in head to toe leather. One looked like Crocodile Dundee in bondage gear, one had a sheepskin collar on his jacket, and one had gravity-defying hair and was smoking something that looked suspiciously like a joint.

Denmark laughed raucously, noticing at the same time. "Well, if it isn't Goldilocks and the three bears!"

Berwald's eyes flashed and he rushed over. Tino looked up from the plastic song book and broke into a delighted smile.

"Berwald! This is Oz, Ned, and…" Tino turned to the smallest, blond man. "I'm sorry, your name was?"

"You can call me Kiwi, love."

"Isn't his accent awesome?" breathed Tino."He's from New Zealand. Oz is from Australia, and Ned is from Holland, and they're all helping me find a song to sing!"

"Berwald!" cried Oz cheerfully. "Your boyfriend's adorable!" Berwald glared, but Oz just laughed. "Settle down, sweetheart, this one's mine." Oz leant over and kissed Ned on the cheek. Ned just blew out a mouthful of smoke. Yep – definitely a joint. "So, mate, you gonna sing a duet with this adorable boyfriend of yours?"

Tino burst into laughter. "Oh, no, he's not my boyfriend, Oz!"

Oz looked Berwald up and down, his dark eyes perceptive beneath even darker brows, his lips twisted in a smirk beneath a moustache worthy of the Village People. "Why not? He's gorgeous. He's got that strong, silent, kills things with his bare hands look going for him."

Tino just giggled again. "Berwald doesn't kill things, Oz! Berwald's really nice. He's never hurt anyone, ever, have you Berwald?"

Berwald lowered his eyes. He was thankfully saved from having to answer that awkward question when a familiar Euro-pop tune blasted from the stage, followed by Tino gasping, jumping, and crying out, "Oh my GOD! I LOVE this song!" Then he disappeared. Berwald blinked and spun around frantically.

"Good luck, mate." Berwald turned back to see Oz, Ned and Kiwi grinning at him. Well, Oz and Kiwi, anyway – Ned just sort of scowled. Oz continued, "This is the bit where you, ya know, run after the bloke or something."

"You do make a very cute couple, love," said Kiwi, winking.

Ned blew out a mouthful of smoke and asked smoothly, "Have you ever considered leather, Berwald?"

Berwald paused for only a moment. "Not rec'ntly," he answered, before pushing into the crowd in search for one very drunk, very happy, very still-damn-perfect Finn. It was only seconds before that familiar, though slightly slurred voice blasted through the pub.

"I LOVE THIS SONG!"

Berwald looked up to see Tino standing on stage with his shining violet eyes, his messy golden hair, his brilliant smile, and his tiny, tiny shorts. The room cheered in response and Tino started singing... or rather, shouting... just in time for the chorus.

"Waterloo - I was defeated you won the war." Tino grinned into the microphone, apparently attempting to sing as loud as humanly possible. A few shouts rang out from the crowd. "Waterloo – promise to love you forever more!"

Berwald felt his mouth drop open and his limbs turn rigid with shock. "Oh, m'God…"

"Waterloo – couldn't escape if I wanted to." The crowd started to clap along. "Waterloo – knowing my fate is to be with you!" Tino sang almost as badly as he danced. He also looked euphoric as he shouted into the microphone, and drew the attention of every person in the room. "Whoa oh oh oh, Waterloo - Finally facing my Waterloo!"

Berwald tried to rush for the stage but was stopped by a familiar, iron grip on his shoulder. Norway waved his beer. "And now you understand the 'No ABBA' rule."

Tino raised a hand above his head and lurched into the next verse. "My, my! I tried to hold you back but you were stronger!"

Denmark appeared beside them, cheering loudly and moving in some sort of mad, animated dance. "Woo yeah! Work it baby!"

"Oh yeah! And now it seems my only chance is giving up the fight."

Iceland threw an arm over Norway's shoulders, tilted his head to the side, and hummed thoughtfully. "I am never lending him my boots again, they look way too good on him."

Tino swung his hips in time with the music. "And how could I ever refuse?"

Berwald shook his head, partly transfixed and partly horrified. "We have to stop him!"

"I feel like I win when I lose!"

Denmark grabbed Berwald by the arm as he tried again to charge for the stage. "Are you kidding me? This is gold! Ooh, wait, I gotta get this on film…" Denmark took his phone from his pocket and started filming.

"Waterloo - I was defeated you won the war." All Tino's insecurities seemed to have melted away as he stood on this silly little stage in this silly little bar, singing his heart out to a brilliantly cliché Swedish pop tune. "Waterloo - promise to love you forever more!"

The crowd was cheering now, everyone in the pub caught up as Tino sang wildly into the microphone, waving his hand in the air and attempting some strange kind of clothed striptease. Berwald was caught between cheering along and wanting to beat down every man in the place.

"Waterloo - couldn't escape if I wanted to. Waterloo – knowing my fate is to be with you."

And finally Berwald stopped, thought clearly, and calmed down. Because Tino was adorable, and a little odd, and yes, he was drunk as hell, but he was also having the time of his life. Denmark raised his beer in the air, cheering; Iceland put his fingers to his mouth and whistled; and even Norway almost cracked a smile. Berwald just put his hand to his head and watched as Tino tried to sing, tried to dance, and succeeded in drawing the entire room to their feet.

"Whoa oh oh oh, Waterloo – finally facing my Waterloo!"

And when Tino's eyes met his, violet and wild and joyful, Berwald felt the next words he sang fire through his ears and make mad, perfect sense. "So how could I ever refuse? I feel like I win when I lose!"

Well, Berwald laughed inwardly. Wasn't that the truth.

"Waterloo – couldn't escape if I wanted to. Waterloo – knowing my fate is to be with you!"

.

"Greenland! Faeroe! Man, you guys missed the most amazing night! Tell them, Berwald, tell them what an amazing night they missed. Oh, they're asleep. Night, Greenland! Night, Faeroe! No but Berwald, wouldn't you totally go and see ABBA if they reformed? You'd have to, you're, like, culturally obligated or something. Is it just me or is this staircase moving? It's like Hogwarts! I saw 'Mamma Mia' last year and it was fabulous and I'm not just saying that because you're Swedish and night, Den! Night, Norge! Don't stay up too late, hur hur. Ice, I swear, if you don't put that phone down and go to bed I will throw this traffic cone at you. How did I get this traffic cone? Oh look, Berwald, we're in my bedroom." Berwald let out a very deep breath, silently cursed Iceland for giving Tino that last shot of Jägermeister, then lowered Tino from his shoulder and set him on his feet.

"You're not scary at all, are you Berwald, not really… you're actually really nice." Tino smiled as he fell forward. Berwald caught him and set him back straight. "You're reeeally nice, Berwald."

Berwald waited until Tino was standing steadily, then reluctantly took his hands from Tino's shoulders. "'kay. Time fer bed."

Tino smiled again, softer this time, and tilted his head. "Do you think I'm nice?"

"Yes." Berwald really hoped he would not have to deal with more drunk talk. Tino's drunk talk was too endearingly senseless to take much more of.

"Oh, good. And you're cute too! Oops I wasn't supposed to say that out loud." Tino reached up and pressed his finger to Berwald's lips. "Ssh, don't tell anyone. You know, Berwald…" Tino pulled up straight and fixed Berwald with a focused glare. "I really, really like you."

"Oh," said Berwald. "Good."

"Do you…" Tino dropped his hand to Berwald's shoulder, lowered his gaze, and paused. "… like me?" Tino looked up slowly, entrancingly, with alluring eyes through long, dark lashes.

Berwald's throat turned dry and the room began to spin. He blinked a few times, his mind blank, his body frozen. He couldn't… he didn't… No, Berwald told himself firmly. Tino was drunk, and in no way actually interested in him. But Berwald still answered his question honestly. "Yes. V'ry much."

Tino giggled happily and started playing absently with Berwald's collar. "Do you think I'm sexy?"

Oh shit oh shit oh shit… Berwald could barely breathe. An inferno fired from the touch of Tino's hands, across Berwald's skin and into his veins, flooding his chest and his gut and spreading lower and… "Think yer sexy." Berwald summoned every ounce of strength in his possession, took Tino's warm, soft hands in his, and pushed them away. "Also think yer drunk." Tino did not take the hint. He flattened his hand on Berwald's chest and met his gaze earnestly.

"Berwald, that Australian in the bar, Oz, it's so funny, he thought you were my boyfriend, isn't that funny?"

Berwald again tried to push Tino gently away, fighting the treacherous desire flooding his veins. "H'larious."

"Berwald?"

"Yes?"

"I... I..." Tino's expression went blank and he turned white. "I think I'm going to throw up." Tino promptly bent at the waist and vomited on Berwald's shoes. Neither moved. After a few very long, very silent moments, Tino looked up slowly, his face distraught. "I think I need to go to bed," he whispered.

Berwald actually had to stop himself from laughing. No one but Tino could look so perfectly adorable at a moment like this. Berwald nodded and attempted to smile kindly – not an expression he was used to, and he wasn't sure he managed it. But when Tino looked at him with those wide, helpless violet eyes, Berwald's heart melted. And he'd really thought he couldn't fall any further. "Yes. I'll help you."

Berwald practically carried Tino to the bed, pulled off the ridiculous white boots, and drew the covers up to his chest. Tino was asleep the second his head hit the pillow. Berwald could not stop himself staring silently at Tino's sleeping face. His eyelashes dark against pale skin; his lips stained blue from coloured vodka.

And Berwald found himself wondering, for the first time, if Tino might ever feel something for him. But even as he thought it, Berwald knew it was impossible. Tino was pure and strange and beautiful; he wanted gardens and family and white picket fences. What did Berwald have? Crippling debt and a criminal history. He was not worthy of someone as good as Tino.

Berwald allowed himself to very briefly brush a lock of hair from Tino's warm forehead before turning and leaving the room. "G, night Tino."

.

Next Chapter

Disclaimer: This story belongs to George deValier. Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. I own nothing.

#catch perfect chapter 6

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #233

lalala song lyrics i’m about to go home so copy/pasting time.

What subject do you seem to struggle with the most? Various forms of mathematics. Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube? Noooo. I don't have that dedication. What’s the worst feeling in the world? Specifically? Giving someone everything you have physically and emotionally with full force and finding out you weren't enough. Who do you think is the easiest to talk to? Sara, probably. What is your favorite genre of movie? Horror, probably. What’s the best thing that happened to you today? Being told I don't have strep throat. Do you have a favorite metal band or do you not like metal? Metal is my favorite genre. I claim a lot as "favorites," but the reigning king will always be Ozzy Osbourne. What’s your favorite kind of science? Genetics. What’s your homeroom? We don't have those in college. If you had to move, where would you move to? Well, my only choice would be to move in with my dad, his wife, and her son. I'm not financially independent. Who did you last go to the movies with? Dad. I think. Have you ever read anything written by Shakespeare? I'm not going to include things assigned in schools because everyone had to read like, Beowulf or something similar at some point. I once started to read the full Macbeth (we read a condensed version in school) during a hospital stay, but I didn't finish it. Who’s the cutest person you know? Have you fuckin SEEN Sara when she's excited because- How about the funniest? Girt's funny as fuck. What is your current desktop picture? An adorable meerkat pup looking at the camera al;sdjfal;kjwerads If you could be reincarnated into anything you wanted, what would it be? I don't know if I'd even want that, but let's just say I was. Maybe... I was gonna say a lioness, because they're high on the food chain, beautiful, and social animals, but yeah I'd prefer to not be poached. Perhaps a house cat. What talent would you like to have? I wish I could draw hyperrealistically. What New Year’s resolutions did you make? I don't make those. What are three songs that mean the most to you? "Pretty Woman" by Van Halen, "The Only Exception" by Paramore, and probably "It's Alright" by Mother Mother. What do you think of your parents? I love them. What is one thing you would do to make the world better? I wish with a snap of my fingers I could just make all litter disappear or something like that. If you could be invisible for a day, what would you do? ... Wow. I actually thought about it, and the first thing my mind drifted to was "go to Jason's just to see he's okay," and I don't like that. We pass his house every day to go to school and come back, and I think it's only natural that I get curious, particularly when his car is there, but I don't want to care. How much cash do you have on you right now? Just a few dollars from Mom to get something from the snack or drink machine from school if I need to. What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do in your life? Move on. Let go of people. Forgive. How do you measure intelligence? I dunno, how do you? Define the *type* of intelligence. What cartoons do you watch? None actively. Have you ever used drugs? Not illicit ones. Are you into tattoos? *blinks* Do you like photography? I fucking read this as "pornography" first aslkjweoaider. But yeah, I love love love photography. What’s the biggest celebrity you’ve ever seen in real life? The only celebrity I think I've ever seen is Alice Cooper, and it was at a concert. What person in history do you admire most? I don't know enough about any historical figure to really answer this with passion. What is the most daring thing that you have done in public? I don't know considering I'm not that daring. Probably a kiss momentarily going too far or something. Are you afraid of anything that most people are not afraid of? Whale sharks lmao. But pregnancy is the biggie. Well, maybe most are to a mild degree at least, idk. Have you ever watched someone struggle with addiction? Yeah. Who do you look up to for your style? I don't look up to a certain person. If you were to invent something, what would it be? I don't know off the top of my head and I don't feel like sitting here- OH NO WAIT! Remember that one year deviantART's April Fools prank was that it produced some sort of technology where you could visualize a drawing, and by scanning your finger or some weird shit while you envisioned it, it could produce it on the screen? Yeah, something like that. I'd pay big bucks for something that could put my ideas on paper. Who would you like to get to know better? One of my RP partners that I've known since childhood. She's just extremely private online. What’s your favorite thing to order at a Chinese food restaurant? Pork fried rice is my jam. In your opinion, what is the greatest challenge the world faces today? Greed, probably. What have you achieved that you once thought was impossible? Getting over Jason. What have you tried to quit, but weren’t able to? Meat. Not for lack of motivation, but health needs. What was the last rumor that you heard? I don't know. What country star would you most like to meet and why? I'm not interested in meeting any. Have you ever been in a car accident? Yeah. What is the most dangerous thing you have ever done? Overdose. What is the meaning of life? I don't pretend to know anymore. I think everyone gives their life its own meaning based on values, goals, beliefs, etc. Do you prefer cupcakes or muffins? That's hard, man. Depends on the kind, I guess. What is the funniest movie you’ve seen in your whole entire lifetime? White Chicks never fails to get me. What’s the worst nightmare you’ve ever had? My dad about to molest me. What’s your favorite amusement park ride? Merry-go-rounds lmao. Who are your musical influences? This seems like a question for an aspiring musician, which I'm not. What’s the best pick-up line that’s ever been tried on you? I don't know if anyone's ever tried one on me. How many drinks can you handle? I wouldn't really know as I've never reached the point of being drunk, but seemingly quite a few. Weak ones, anyway. If it has a high alcohol concentration, I'm not drinking that shit. What was the longest phone conversation you’ve ever had? Idk, most of the afternoon or evening. I think one occasion with an old best friend went past five hours. Do you know where you want to go to college? I'm happy at my current college. They care a lot about their students. Are you satisfied with the picture on your ID card? Permit, fuck no. School ID, it's alright. What fruit did you last eat? An apple. Aside from yourself, who was the last person to see you naked? My mom. How many classes are you taking? Four, currently. Jumping up to six next semester... though not really by choice. My adviser wants me to have like a safety net by having two classes I CAN drop if I need to, but she's realistic in pointing out that the school path I visualize doable for me will be a VERY slow one and ultimately cost so, so much more money, so she wants to nudge me along as best she can while keeping my limitations in mind. I'm definitely going to try the best I can to do this in four years, but yeah... unlikely. But that's okay to me, so long I get there in not TOO long of a time. Have you ever lost anything down a toilet? I don't think so... but I do recall when my older sister was tiny she flushed a little toy truck down the toilet. We had to get a plumber to save it lmao. I think my mom has kept the truck. Are you someone’s best friend? One of hers. Do you have any goldfishes? No. Have you ever had a pet that you disliked? I absolutely hate my sister's dog that for whatever fucking reason lives with Mom and me. Why we keep a dog that does nothing but annoy us and piss us off is a subject of more than frequent arguing. When was the last time you saw hail? I don't know, a long time ago. What color eyes do you prefer: Green or Brown? Green. Have you ever given a nickname to your pet(s)? Oh yeah. Of my living ones, I call Venus "Miss Venus" and "pretty girl" a whole lot, while Teddy has a whole lot, but mostly "booga," "bub(by)," "boogie," and "Teddy-boo." I just call Roman "butt" a lot, lmao. I don't really have a common one for Mitsu, but I sometimes use "baby girl," I think. Ever been on a boat before? Like, fishing boats. Which is better: Skiing or Snowboarding? I wouldn't know, never tried either. Can you change the oil on a car? I have no clue how. Ever ran out of gas? Not while I myself was driving. I don't even know if I've ever been in the car while that's happened. Favorite kind of sandwich? Most of the time just an 'ole pb&j. Best thing to eat for breakfast? mmmmmmm cinnamon rolls are the GOOD SHIT. Are you horny? Nah. Do you have any magazine subscriptions? Nope. Which are better legos or lincoln logs? Lincoln logs or GET OUT. Are you stubborn? Yeah, most of the time. Are you afraid of heights? YEAH. Ever used a gun? Nooooo and I don't want to. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? Idk if the guy who did my school ID card was an actual photographer? I dunno? Ever eat a pierogi? I hate those goddamn pockets of disgust. Favorite type of fruit pie? I dun like pie. I used to be okay with apple, though. Do you believe in ghosts? 110%. Ever have a deja-vu feeling? Yes because our world is just a simulation and it's a glitch- (I'm only semi-kidding btw idk I kinda believe it) Why do you think others get deja-vu? Because our world is just a simulation and it's a glitch- Take a vitamin daily? No. I need to, though. Wear a bath robe? No, I get dressed right after the shower. What do you wear to bed? Pajama pants and a tank top. First concert? Alice Cooper. Outside. During a thunderstorm. Shit was badass. Peanuts or sunflower seeds? Both are ew. I can handle a little bit of peanut better, though. Ever take dance lessons? I grew up taking a lot through middle school and some of high school. I tooook... clogging (I was embarrassingly good at that omg), jazz, modern (my fave), lyrical very briefly 'cuz I am NOT graceful, and hip hop. I always hated the music, but the dancing itself is fun. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? No. They can do whatever they aspire to. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Yeah. Own any record albums? Not anymore, Mom sold them. I wish I had them now, ahhhh. I love 'em. Own a record player? No. Who would you like to see in concert? I am seeing Ozzy next year or I will fucking riot, Metallica, and Rammstein. Many others would be cool, but those are the biggies. I'd love to see Manson and Otep, but their shows are... yeah. They do gross and/or really disrespectful shit. Hot tea or cold tea? THERE ARE SO MANY TEA OR COFFEE QUESTIONS IN SURVEYS but they tend to be different so I just keep them in alsdjf;awe. The usual: I hate tea. Can you swim well? I guess I swim fine? DJ or band, at a wedding? DJ. I want a variety of music. Ever won a contest? A few, don't feel like trying to remember 'em. Ever have plastic surgery? No. Which are better black or green olives? Olives are fucking gross. Best room for a fireplace? Living room. Who was your high school crush? My first was either Sebastian or Kyle. Or Girt. Then Juan, though that crush was questionable if it was serious or not. He really flattered me a lot, but I've told the story before plenty. Idk if the emotion was romantically reciprocated, though honestly I think it was mostly because of his reputation? I only knew him as extremely sweet. BUT ANYWAY, after that, do I even need to say "Jason?" When he came along, whether or not I really liked Juan was totally forgotten. What do you believe happens to us after death? Hell if I know. Have you ever cheated on someone? No. Does the thought of growing old frighten you? More like the thought of my body deteriorating does. Have you ever hurt someone for your own entertainment? um the fuck. I've done it out of heartbreak and pain, but never for my entertainment. What is your favorite song of all time? Of all time, probably "False Flags" by Massive Attack. Has anyone you’ve known died on a holiday? Possibly, idk. If you could write a book, what would it be about? Sometimes I wish I could make a series out of the meerkat RP I engage in, but I don't have the motivation or dedication for that. And I wouldn't be comfortable revising our "tribute" characters for the sake of legality and just respect in general. What are some lyrics that speak to your soul? "For such a little thing, you sure are in your own way" from a Mother Mother song. I'm not exactly small for a human ha ha, but in the scope of the universe perspective, we're all less than microscopic. Have you ever been in love with more than one person at the same time? Not in love, not. Attracted to, yeah. What is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to you? I remember, though it's a tad blurry, the occasion I was having a serious "grieving session" for Jason at Colleen's house, and her sister was there alone with me. She was talking me through it and grabbed my shoulders at one point, looked me dead in the eye, and told me so firmly yet gently how beautiful a person I was and that I deserved the world and more. I won't forget that, like ever. Do you have any taboo fetishes or preferences? No. What is the thing you are most ashamed of? I've talked about this enough. Well, that or just being a general "this is all your goddamn fault and I am the only victim here" cunt to Jason following the breakup. Actually, yeah, I'm probably more ashamed of that. What is the emotion you seem to feel most strongly? Hm. Embarrassment? Heartbreak? Love? Idk. Do you think of yourself as a unique person? Yeah, honestly. I mean not incredibly, but unique, yeah. What is a movie from childhood that you loved? I've talked about TLK and Finding Nemo and that kinda stuff a lot, so here's a STUPIDLY underrated one: Spirit: Stallion of the Cimmaron. That movie is fuckin beautiful wtf. Are you afraid of death? Aren't we all at least to a small degree? What are your top three biggest fears, actually? Losing my mom, being raped, and all those I love just abandoning me. Do you have an accent of any kind? You can detect a Southern one sometimes. What do you want to be remembered for? Sending a message of love, especially to animals. Are you currently sad about anything? I am literally permanently sad about my weight, though it's not like, an *active* sadness at this very moment? Have you ever changed your spiritual beliefs? Three times now. Catholic to Christian to theist. What is your favorite alcoholic drink? MARGARITAS gotDAMN Do you ever talk to yourself? Sure. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep in your adult life? Oh yeah. What do you think is the meanest thing you’ve ever said to someone? "Thanks for sending me to the ER again." Fucking bitch. Do you have a favorite book? If so, how many times have you read it? Johnny Got His Gun and The Outsiders. Only read both once. I almost never read a book more than that. Have you ever wished you were from another country? Half the time, especially as an adult, I wish I lived in Canada. What are you thinking about currently? My throat is absolutely killing me and I'm ready to leave school. What is a subject that makes you uncomfortable to speak about? I'm more uncomfortable talking about sex than I used to think. Do you have anything you are extremely particular about? When I'm in the passenger seat controlling the music? Oh my god, Mom, DON'T turn the volume down manually. I can do that on my iPod myself, but can only turn it back UP but so loud as it gets lower by the car itself. She knows I turn it down when we're talking, she is, or we slow down, but she does it anyway sometimes and I get unreasonably annoyed by it. Have you ever seen the ocean? Only the Atlantic. What is your most fond memory of your current S.O, if applicable? THE FIRST KISS Y'ALL it was fuckin CHEESY but I LOVE IT Do you find yourself confused often? Oh hell yeah. What was the best time of your life? It's so funny to me how I can answer "2017," the very same year I OD'd. That's rapid growth, my friend. Have you ever been on a cruise? No. Do you miss any of your exes? I only miss the memories of him. Are you religious? I mean I believe in some ultimate creator, but I don't really like calling myself "religious" anymore. I don't worship it, I don't pray to it. I'm thankful to exist, but that's. It, I guess. ANY entity I would respect wouldn't demand me to kiss its feet. Do you think you are attractive? HELL NO. How many people have you slept with? Do you mean like, as in having sex? One. Slightly fooled around with, two, including the previously-mentioned guy. Do you consider yourself a catch? Besides my looks, I do think I'm a good girlfriend. What kind of sauce do you eat your chicken nuggets with? Honey mustard, actual mustard... that kinda stuff. What do you think you could do to improve your life? Get a goddamn job, I'm just really not capable right now. What song is playing right now? "Hag" by Otep. What is your LJ name? I don't have a LiveJournal. I don't even want to EXIST on the same site with a particular fat-headed, bigoted fuck of a bitch. Holy shit I've nearly made an account multiple times JUST to talk that cunt back to Earth. What was the most recent movie you watched? UHHHHHHHH I don't remember actually. How many times have you got stitches? UHHHH twice or thrice? What are your pets’ species and names? I'm excluding the dog I hate because he's not even "mine." Teddy is a beagle/cocker spaniel/probably something else mix. Roman is a cat mix; he seems to have Siamese or something similar in 'im. Mitsu is a fancy rat. Venus is a champagne ball python. What is your most recent musical crush? Mark is a fucking singer, DON'T EVEN @ ME ABOUT IT. Which is better; immense heat or extreme coldness? God, the latter. I literally can't handle like anything above 70 for even like 10 minutes. It's not just that I find heat uncomfortable, but I sweat to a disgusting degree and get extremely weak, dizzy, and sometimes nauseous. Do you have a disease? Just mental ones. I have at least one physical disorder, but not a disease. Do you like gore? BITCH yes. Especially in art. It's the smell irl I can't really handle, as well as seeing like, human gore, but also exclusively in the real world. It feels too personal and close to home, y'know? Do you stutter? YEP. Name a cool person you have lost touch with? Megan, particularly. Who was the friendliest person you have met on the internet? MAN, I don't know if I could pick!! Maybe uhhhh... Megan again? She was nice to like... everyone. Or Connie for the same reason, and she's also chill as hell. I really don't know, I've met a load of great people. Name a song that is overplayed. I don't listen to the radio, so. What websites do you visit frequently? Kalahari Manor, deviantART, YouTube, Facebook, the Silent Hill wiki to make sure it's not exploding from mental cases again to not make it to fucking video game and horror sites/blogs again, and especially lately, Tumblr. There's more, but those are the regularly frequent ones. Does counting sheep help you fall asleep? Never tried. What is the biggest mystery? Where the universe came from and why.

#survey #questions #quiz #random #bored

[frywen-babbles]

Sounds of Silence pt6

"They shouldn't send you messages like that. You've done nothing wrong."

"It's okay. It'll die out soon enough when they realise I won't make any of this public. I just want to move on with my life." She shoved some cake into her mouth before she continued. "Enough about me. How have you been?"

"Studying," he replied before he thought of something. "I'll visit mother tomorrow... I thought... maybe you'd..."

"I'd love to come. Just tell me when and where and I'll be there."

He nodded in response and took a sip of his tea. Why was the situation suddenly so... awkward. What did people talk about in dates... non-dates anyway?

"Um... What's the new job you got?"

"The same old. Shelving in a grocery store, just in a different one than before."

"That must be... interesting."

"Please, it's boring as fuck. But it's a job."

Mitsunari regarded her carefully. Once she had talked about wanting to become a teacher and he couldn't but wonder what had become of those dreams. Now she seemed content at working in a grocery store, her dreams seemingly forgotten. Not that there was anything wrong with that, but he remembered how fondly she had talked about her dream. Had she given up on it completely? She wouldn't, would she? He worked so hard to achieve his dream and proving himself it seemed almost unthinkable someone would just give up.

"Earth to Manju-boy, are you even paying attention to me?" Mitsunari was woken from his thoughts when she tapped his arm gently.

"Just thinking about my studies."

"How are they going anyways?"

*****

Miraculously, their non-date had ended well and way less awkwardly than he had feared. They had ended up talking about his studies for way longer than he had planned, but she hadn't seemed to mind.

He was just about to go to sleep when his phone blinged with a message.

<i wntd 2 apologise> <i hd no rght 2 b that mean 2 u>    <What do you mean?> <thse mssgs i swd u> <i thgt ud say th same> <thnk u> <it rly mns a lot ur on my side>    <Of course I am.>

She didn't reply so he put his phone down and closed his eyes ready to sleep. But just as he had drifted off his phone blinged with a new message waking him up.

<it tk me 2 long 2 admit wht ws gng on. nd aftr thn i wnted 2 stay bc i lved him. i blievd it ws nly once. twice. i thght if id jst chnge myslf he didnt hve any rson 2 gt angry at me. i trd so hrd 2 be the prfct wife i feel like i lost myself. Ths isnt how I thght my life wld be.> <im scred> <i have no1 I cn rely on> <im sorry im blathering u must be thinking abt ur mom> <i shldnt cmplain evrythng is fine im sry>    <No, it's okay. It's understandable to be scared.> <sry> <im jst so lost> <nd scard> <all of ths is nw 2 me> <we gt mrried whn i finishd hgh school. i rlied 2 hm on evrthng> <nd nw its jst all gne> <sry 2 nght evrthng jist cmes rshing dwn> <ill go 2 bed now night>    <Don't apologise. Being scared of the unknown is part of human nature.>    <Good night.>

***

The next day he waited for her in front of the hospital. He had come way too early so his thoughts turned into the previous day and to his... non-date. She had looked very pretty. Beautiful. He looked at his watch when he felt a light tap on his arm and turned around to find her standing next to him.

"Are you sure you want to come?" he asked.

"Of course! I wouldn't have said yes if I didn't want to."

Mitsunari sneaked into the first bathroom in the ward and a moment later when he emerged he expected her to laugh or... something. Instead, she looked at him earnestly, her expression serious.

"Are you ready?" she asked before she reached to straighten out a hair on his wig. He gave a firm nod before he headed out towards his mother's room.

"Mitsunari!" He stopped when he heard his name and sighed before he turned around to greet one of the nurses. "I see you brought your girlfriend today, how nice of you. Why haven't you told us before you have a girlfriend?" the nurse winked at him and he resisted the urge to either roll his eyes or facepalm.

"We're friends," he said at the same time she bowed.

"Thank you for taking care of Mitsunari," she said aloud. It was the first time Mitsunari had heard her speak. He missed completely when she introduced herself, his mind focused only on the sound of her voice, on the way she slowly pronounced each word, on the melody of her voice and he couldn't help but want to hear her voice again and again. He wanted to hear what she sounded like when she was happy, when she was excited, when she was sad. He felt selfish in his want, but still, he wanted her to show all sides of herself to him.

Mitsunari tugged on her arm and bowed to the nurse, repeating his earlier words of them being just friends, but it didn't wipe the knowing smile from the nurse's lips.

Just when he was about to knock on the door of his mother's room, he felt her take a hold of his hand and give it a firm squeeze. He held her hand a bit tighter too and knocked on the door.

"Mother? It's me, Saki."

"Saki! My beautiful, darling Saki!" He heard her voice before he saw her.

"Mother, I brought a friend with me." He stepped inside and gently pulled her in with him and introduced her.

"It is nice to meet you, Mrs Ishida." She bowed and his mother beamed at them. He didn't even remember when he had seen her looking so happy.

"I'm so happy Saki brought a friend with her! Come here, sit." His mother patted the bed beside her. She glanced at him and when he nodded she sat beside her.

"Thank you."

She paid close attention to his mother, turning every now and then to him for clarification. He felt like his mother recited every embarrassing thing he had ever done, his face burning hot with embarrassment under the makeup. A small (well, a big) consolation was hearing her laugh aloud, something he hadn't heard since the day after he had rescued her from her ex.

When his mother started to look tired he got up and nudged her arm.

"I think we should go now, mother. I'll come back soon."

"Please bring your lovely friend again too! It warms my heart to know you have such a good friend."

"I'll have to ask her..." he mumbled giving his mother a hug.

When he took her hand to lead her outside he could feel her hand tremble. He glanced at her, but her expression was a calm, calculated mask. As soon as they were outside of the door he let go of her hand.

"Your hands are trembling."

"You're imagining things," she replied with a smile which didn't quite reach her eyes.

"But-" he started, but was cut off when she turned away from him.

"Excuse me..." she hurried to the nearest bathroom leaving him to stare after her. He was still staring at the door when she emerged a moment later her eyes red and puffy.

“Sorry...” she forced a smile and as much as he wanted to ask, he decided not to pry was probably the best option.

“I’ll go change. We could... You could come for tea... if you want.” How did people ask others to hang out? It was apparent he was terrible at it.

“I’d love to.” This time the smile she gave him was genuine.

Their trip at his place was mostly filled with comfortable silence. She leaned against his shoulder on the train, dozing off every now and then. He concluded she must be tired but didn’t want to pry the reason why. She would tell him if she wanted to.

When they reached his apartment, Hideyoshi was already there, half asleep watching YouTube videos in the living room.

“Oh, heeey... I didn’t think you’d be back yet, you okay?” he mumbled waving his hand at his general direction without turning around.

“We came to make some food.”

“We? I thought you went to- oh hi!” Hideyoshi turned around to look at them and as soon as he saw her he waved at them awkwardly.

He laid over the handrest of the sofa looking at them while they unloaded the groceries and prepared the food.

Mitsunari sighed and turned to look at Hideyoshi, who had a bright smile on his lips as soon as he looked at him. “Do you want something? If you don’t, stop staring like a starved puppy. The mutt next door does a good enough job on that already without your help.”

"I thought you'd never ask me to join! It smells so good."

Hideyoshi made the table and they sat down to eat.

"So, what were you up today?" Hideyoshi asked filling his bowl with food.

"None of your business."

"So it was a secret date!"

Mitsunari was just about to reply when she coughed and reached for a glass of water her face starting to turn an adorable shade of red.

"Are you okay?" he asked her when she managed to gulp down some water her face still bright red.

"Why does Monkey think we went on a secret date?"

Mitsunari felt his cheeks start to burn out of embarrassment too, her embarrassment only increasing his own.

"I don't know! Stop inventing stupid nicknames to my friends."

"Shut it Manju-boy! You better tell Monkey-boy he has it all wrong. We are friends, nothing else."

Mitsunari translated her words to Hideyoshi who had been grinning knowingly at their mutual blushing, but he couldn't help the pang in his heart at her flat out refusal of them being on a date.

It must be so terrible to her to even think him as a man after what she had seen of him today. After all, she knew of him.

She would never see him in any other way than as a friend and realising that hurt way more than he thought it would. It hurt so much for a while he couldn't even think straight, yet alone be a part of the conversation.

"Mitsunari, did you hear what I said?" Hideyoshi's words brought him back to himself and when he glanced at her, even she was staring at him with a small frown between her (very beautiful) brows.

"No, my mind was elsewhere."

"In the gutter, I imagine?" Hideyoshi winked at him but all he could do was roll his eyes.

"You had *something* to say, so spit it out."

"Um, yeah, Nobu wants us to go play Wii next Sunday, why don't you two come too?"

"And he expects us just happily spend a Sunday dealing with utter torture?"

"There will be free food! Nothing beats free food."

"Fine..." he grumbled and turned to her, but her eyes were already sparkling. "A friend of ours wants us to go play Wii at his place on Sunday. Do you want to come?"

"Only if I get the promised free food you were talking about!"

***

The next Sunday they found themselves in front of a grand downtown building where Nobunaga's personal apartment was. She was staring at it her mouth agape.

"Your friend lives here?"

"Yeah."

"Wow..."

She held onto his sleeve when they entered the building, her eyes wide at the sight of the doorman and the security.

When the doors opened at the top floor she was stunned. He had to nearly drag her forward to meet their host.

Not that that went any better. As soon as she saw Nobunaga, she yanked at his sleeve until he was sure it would rip off.

"That's- that's O-da No-bu-na-ga!"

"I know. Now stop pulling my sleeve!"

"But... how?"

"Blame Hi-de-yo-shi, he always wants to drag me along..."

"Wait how does Monkey know him?"

He was about to reply when Nobunaga seemed to get bored of not being a part of the conversation.

"The least you could do was to introduce her."

As soon has he had managed to introduce her, Hideyoshi, who had come at the same time with them leant towards Nobunaga with a conspirational grin.

"You know, she's Mitsunari's 'special friend'"

"Oh, is she now?" Nobunaga had an amused smile on his lips when he eyed her.

"Stop making it sound so dirty," he huffed at them and took her hand to lead her away from the two men determined to misunderstand their relationship.

They found Hanbei huddled at a corner already, his nose deep in a book. He didn't pay any attention to them so they sat on the sofa next to him. She was tense, eying her surroundings like a caged animal before she turned to him.

"Just... how? You do know he's very famous, right?"

"Yes. But Hi-de-yo-shi keeps dragging me along every time..."

"You're playing Wii with the famous O-da No-bu-na-ga..." she repeated it to herself as if to make sure she understood correctly. Suddenly, she lifted her head and grasped his arm. "How did he know who I was?"

"It was him who offered to let you stay in the guestroom in the house. It's only used when someone in the Oda family has important guests over."

"Wait what? I thought that was where miss Oichi lives?"

"No, she was just staying over so you wouldn't have to be alone."

She buried her head in her hands for a while before she looked at him again, a hints of despair in her expression.

"How can I ever repay them?"

"You don't have to. Everyone wanted to help."

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

Even though it ate him alive he’d had to ask for their help there was no way he would tell her that. He would repay them as soon as possible.

The atmosphere relaxed as more people showed up. She didn’t leave his side until her gaze shifted to all of the snacks Nobunaga had brought out.

"What a nasty little piggy you have found for yourself."

There were people he’d be glad if he never had to see ever again. Tokugawa Ieyasu was one of them. Even the existence of him made Mitsunari’s skin crawl with disgust, let alone hearing whatever hideous thing he had to say. Why Nobunaga kept inviting the man was beyond him.

"Shut your mouth, filthy tanuki!" he spat back at Ieyasu, his eyes on her. She kept happily showing a snack after snack into her mouth until she glanced at him.

She froze, her eyes travelling from him to Hideyoshi and back at him.

"What happened?"

"It's nothing."

"Why won't you tell me?" She looked around the room, at everyone staring at them and she shrank back, averting her eyes to the floor. She made a quick bow and fled the room.

He followed her to the entrance hall, where she was desperately hitting the button to call the elevator, her face turned away from him so he couldn't see her expression. She cast a quick glance at him before she averted her eyes again and dug out her phone.

<i dnt blong hre ill jst go> <tll evry1 im sry>

The doors slid open and she took a step towards the elevator, but he took a hold of her arm to stop her. He needed... wanted to know what was wrong with her. Why did she suddenly decide to run away from him.

She froze, standing completely still. He slowly let go of her arm and she quickly hugged herself. He was at loss at what to do. He followed her to the elevator, but she kept her eyes on the door, completely ignoring his presence.

Had he done something wrong? If he had, he had no idea what it might be or why had she reacted the way she had.

When they reached the ground floor he followed her out of the elevator but reached for her arm again, this time just to gently touch her. She turned to look at him, tears glistening on her cheeks, but she quickly wiped them away, her lips pursed to stop the quiver of her lower lip.

"What happened?" he asked. She took her phone and fiddled with it for a moment and soon he heard his phone alert him of a new message.

<i dnt blng>

She turned around to walk out of the door, but he reached for her again.

"What do you mean? Explain." She was just about to look at her phone again when he tapped on her arm again. "Talk to me."

She turned her head away from him and he was just about to reach for her arm again when the security guard interrupted them.

"Is everything alrigh, miss?" he asked. She jumped a bit and looked at his face, a small frown between her brows.

"...sorry...?" she whispered.

"Is everything alright, miss? Is this man bothering you? Do you need a taxi to get you home?"

"Thank you, we're fine," Mitsunari interrupted.

"I was talking to the young lady, sir." The security guard gave him a stern look. She looked from him to the security guard, her expression guarded.

"...fine... no... taxi..." she mumbled.

"Could we talk somewhere a bit more private?" Mitsunari asked the security guard, who pointed them at a bench at the side of the entrance hall, hidden from the view by a large plant. He guided her to sit down and sat next to her touching her hand gently to get her to look at him.

"Talk to me, please?"

"This... everything was a bad idea. I should have listened to Yoshi, I’ll never fit in..."

@masamunesmistress @han-pan @you-mass-effect-my-dragon-age @honeybeelily @dreamfar628

#slbp #slbp fanfic #ishida mitsunari #toyotomi hideyoshi #voltage fanfic #frywen writes #sounds of silence fic

[vernonfielding]

Life Writes Its Own Stories

Chapter 11. (AO3!)

Jake walked home in a daze. As he unlocked his front door, he couldn’t recall quite how he’d gotten there, as though his brain had shut off for a while, and his feet had just carried him somewhere safe and familiar.

He shrugged off his coat and kicked off his shoes. He sat hard on the end of his bed and brought his hands to his face, digging his palms into his eyes to keep himself from crying. He could feel the tears in his throat and burning behind his eyes and he knew it was only a matter of time, but he was afraid that once he started he wouldn’t know how to stop.

His cell phone buzzed in his pocket, and Jake yanked it out, didn’t even bother to look before turning it off. It could be Amy, or it could be Rosa or Scully or fucking Pembroke telling him he was fired. He didn’t want to talk to any of them – or anyone at all. He tossed the phone onto his couch, then pulled out his keys and threw them hard across the room. They left a satisfying dent in the wall beneath his Die Hard poster.

“Fuck,” he said, under his breath, then yelled out, “Fuck!” He fell back on his bed and stared at the ceiling.

It seemed impossible that he’d been in perhaps the best mood of his life just that morning – less than an hour ago, maybe. He had just bought them breakfast, was thinking about where to stop for coffee on the way back, when he spotted the Bulletin in a newsrack near the bodega entrance. He couldn’t have said what caught his eye first, except that he’d gotten in the habit of glancing at the front page to look for Amy’s name. But the word “vulture” had made him stop in his tracks, right in the doorway. A woman had jostled him and muttered a “fuck you” as she pushed by. He’d barely noticed.

He’d picked up the paper and looked back at the man behind the counter, who knew Jake was a regular. The man had nodded and waved him out, and Jake had left without paying. He’d stopped just outside and read Gina’s column, his heart in his throat the whole way through.

The column had Amy all over it. Everything in there had come from him, had been shared with her over late-night dinners as they pored over documents, or later, while they lay in bed together or cuddled on her sofa or took walks around Fort Greene.

He’d stalked back to her apartment, angrier than he could recently recall. Righteous fury had carried him all the way to her building, but as he’d climbed the stairs to her door it burned down to embers, replaced by something far worse: hurt.

Then seeing her, wide-eyed with worry, still so beautiful to him, he’d deflated. And he’d wanted so badly to believe her when she said she’d done nothing wrong, when she said she would never hurt him like that. Maybe she hadn’t meant to, he reasoned. Maybe she’d said some things she shouldn’t have weeks ago, before they were even dating, and Gina had somehow come up with the rest herself. Or maybe Amy had been drunk and didn’t remember talking. Or maybe she had handed it all to Gina knowingly and regretted it only later, when faced with the consequences. Maybe Jake hadn’t known her at all.

He didn’t really think that, even now. But he didn’t know what to think or who to believe. He just had facts: Gina had written a column that had the potential to destroy his career, and the only person who could have given her that column was Amy. And he’d trusted her. She’d made the short list. She’d maybe even been at the top.

Alone in his apartment, Jake stared at the ceiling until the spidery cracks in the paint began to blur. He didn’t fight the tears when they finally came.

+++

Despite everything, Amy still managed to get to work 10 minutes early. She knew she was looking rough as she flashed the press pass that doubled as her Bulletin ID at Doug behind the security desk. But she was still caught off guard when he said, “Ms. Santiago, are you okay?” Which of course made her immediately tear up again, so after she brushed him off with a quivery “Mondays, am I right?” she spent a good 20 minutes in the ladies’ room getting herself under control.

That was how she actually ended up 10 minutes late, feeling off-balance and shaky and annoyed with herself and angry with everyone else. She took her seat across from Gina, and Gina looked up and did a double-take.

“Damn, girl.”

An image flashed in Amy’s mind, of her launching herself over their two desks and tackling Gina to the floor and strangling her, just a little.

Instead she stood up again and slapped her palms on her desk, hard enough to rattle her keyboard. “What the hell, Gina?”

“Whoa, I was just going to say you looked like you had the best and/or worst night of your life but if you’re going to get all murdery about it-”

“We need to talk.” Amy leaned over their desks and practically growled. “Now.”

She stalked to the break room and didn’t look to make sure Gina was following. (She didn’t honestly think she had intimidated Gina, but she knew Gina would come if only for the drama.)

The day before – and all last night, when she should have been sleeping – Amy’s thoughts had spiraled, twisting and throttling around her brain like a tornado she was powerless to control, much less stop. The confrontation with Jake had played on an endless loop, and sometimes she got to keep talking, keep trying to explain, but it always ended the same – with him walking out. She’d cried off and on all day, until she felt wilted from it, her body and mind spent. A dozen times she’d picked up her phone to call or text him, but she didn’t know what she could, or wanted to, say. She couldn’t apologize, she couldn’t ask forgiveness – she’d done nothing wrong. But what else was there?

In her saner moments, she’d imagined this: talking to Gina. Eventually she’d crafted a speech, in which she firmly but delicately inquired as to how Gina got that column. Technically it was on Amy’s beat after all – she had every right to ask. In a calm, work-appropriate way.

When they got into the breakroom Amy closed the door and yelled, “What the fuck were you thinking?”

“I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about, but I can tell you what I’m thinking right now, which is that you are cray-cray.”

Gina planted her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow. Amy took a deep breath, let it out slowly. Then she did it three more times. Gina just watched.

“Fine,” Amy said coolly. “I’m talking about your column yesterday. About the 99th Precinct.”

“You’re mad about that?” Gina frowned. “I mean, I know it’s a cop thing and that’s your turf, but it was such a throwaway. I thought that gossipy crap was beneath you.”

“It is,” Amy said, “but you had to know this wasn’t going to look good for Jake. Did you even think about him? About his career?”

“Jake who?”

“Peralta.”

Amy’s slip-up hit her the moment Gina’s face lit up.

“Jake Peralta. Oh my god – Jake is your source?”

“Was my source,” Amy said. She bit her lip, unsure what else she could say – what she was allowed to say. Gina was Jake’s friend first, but he wasn’t here now. And Amy realized suddenly that she needed someone to know what had happened – and Gina was responsible, after all.

She took a deep breath. “We were dating. But I think we’re maybe broken up now.”

“Okay, wow. Did not see that coming.” Gina sat on the breakroom couch. She stared up at Amy, her brows turned down in bemusement. “We’re talking about the same Jake Peralta, right? Plaid shirts, basically lives off gummy worms and pizza pockets, has maybe only ever seen one movie in his life?”

“Well, technically it’s a franchise, so, like, five movies-” Amy closed her eyes and stopped herself. Then she nodded morosely, and dropped onto the couch beside Gina.

Gina tucked one leg under herself and turned to face her. “How did you even meet?”

“You just said it yourself,” Amy said, rolling her eyes. “He was my source. He works in the Nine-Nine?”

“Oh right – is it weird that I can never remember he’s a cop?”

“It’s very weird,” Amy said. She slumped into the couch, tipping her head back on the cushions and staring up at the ceiling tiles. “Do you have any idea what you did with that column?”

“Yeah, I’m still not following why this is an issue,” Gina said.

“The Vulture is Jake’s boss.”

“And,” Gina said, gesturing for her to go on.

Amy sighed. “And Jake talks to me about him all the time. And the Vulture’s already suspicious about Jake being my source.”

“So, you’re afraid this Vulture dude is going to think that Jake was my source for the column,” Gina said.

Amy hummed a yes, and then added, “And Jake thinks I was your source.”

“He- what?” Gina sat up and gaped at Amy. “He actually said that?”

“He did,” Amy said, the grief hitting her all over again. She blinked hard against the familiar pinpricks in the corners of her eyes.

“God, he’s such an idiot,” Gina said. “Look, I can’t tell you who my source is, because- okay, actually because I don’t know his name.”

“Gina!” Amy stared at her, appalled. It was one thing to use anonymous sources for a story, but reporters at least had to know who they were talking to, even if they never revealed the name publicly. It was too easy to be lied to and misled otherwise.

“It was just gossip,” Gina said, throwing her hands up. “I ran it by a couple of my own sources and they said it was legit, so I went with it.”

“And now Jake thinks I blew his cover all for some dumb gossip column and we’re basically broken up.” Amy groaned and slid onto her side, curling up in a corner of the couch.

There was a brief silence and then Gina said, “Not that I would do it, because I don’t think I care that much – but do you want me to call Jake and explain it wasn’t you?”

Amy thought over the offer for a moment before shaking her head. “It doesn’t matter. He either trusts me or he doesn’t. And I guess he doesn’t.”

She felt Gina patting her ankle. It was hesitant and awkward and Amy was deeply moved, and she felt the tears run fresh down her cheeks. They sat quietly for a few minutes, Amy crying into the disgusting couch while Gina almost certainly played on her phone.

Amy was just about ready to get up, wipe her face, and make another attempt at facing the world when Gina said, “Are you sure Jake’s a cop in the Nine-Nine? I feel like I would remember that.”

Amy rolled onto her back and stared at Gina in wonder. “Jake has the weirdest friends.”

+++

Jake realized he was clutching at the arms of his chair hard enough to turn his knuckles white, and he let go and rubbed his sweaty palms on his pants legs. On the wall across from him was a framed poster of Officer Pepper O’Pigeon, hanging behind the commissioner’s secretary’s desk. For such a goofy mascot it was oddly threatening – Jake thought it had something to do with the shirt sleeves being cut off to accommodate the bird’s arms, or wings. Like it was too buff to be constrained by a normal police uniform. But the long pink legs were also upsetting.

He tore his gaze away and straightened his tie, again, and avoided looking at the man sitting in the chair next to his. Jake couldn’t ignore the staccato of snips, though, as the Vulture trimmed his nails while they waited. The man was truly the most disgusting person Jake knew.

“A tie’s not gonna save your ass, Peralta,” Pembroke said with a cheerful snicker.

Jake just barely stopped himself from telling Pembroke to go fuck himself.

Jake had honestly been surprised when he’d gotten the call that morning to come to the commissioner’s office for a meeting – he’d expected Pembroke to handle the punishment himself, or at worst take it a step or two up the chain of command. That Jake was being hauled down to One Police Plaza meant that the brass were taking Gina’s column more seriously than he’d expected, and also that he could be in seriously deep trouble. 

Sure, in his lowest moments the day and night before he had imagined losing his job and ending up homeless and alone and living off of dog food and cheese puffs for the rest of his life, but he hadn’t really believed that would happen. Now his gut churned with real fear. They could take away his detective badge. He could lose everything.

The secretary’s phone rang and Jake’s anxiety spiked. The secretary picked up the call, hung up without saying a word, and announced, “The commissioner’s ready for you.”

Pembroke brushed off his pants and stood, gesturing for Jake to go before him. When Jake got up and moved toward the office, Pembroke nudged him aside and jumped in front, smirking over his shoulder. The guy was seriously the worst.

Jake hadn’t been in the commissioner’s office since Wuntch won the job a couple of years before. It looked basically the same as the previous commissioner’s office had, with framed commendations hanging on the walls and a few photos of Wuntch with random politicians and celebrities lined up on the bookcase adjacent to the desk. He paused on a shot of Wuntch with an irritated-looking Michelle Obama; both of their hair was slightly mussed up in the photo.

“Have a seat,” Wuntch said. She was already behind her desk, hands folded on top of a copy of the Bulletin.

Jake put a hand to his chest to keep his badge in place as he sat, feeling suddenly self-conscious in his cargo pants and plaid shirt and leather jacket. Even with the tie he felt sloppy and unprofessional next to two high-ranking cops in full uniform. He wished for a moment that he’d at least picked out a clean shirt for his funeral, but then, he’d had a lot on his mind when he’d gotten dressed that morning.

“Peralta should be fired,” Pembroke said without preamble. Jake felt his heart clench.

“Now, let’s not be hasty,” Wuntch said. She looked between them, narrowing her eyes. “Captain Pembroke – or should I call you Captain Vulture?”

Pembroke sneered at Jake.

“Captain,” Wuntch went on, “you asked for this meeting. It’s my understanding that you believe Detective Peralta is responsible for this rather enlightening article in the Bulletin?”

She pushed the newspaper across her desk, and Pembroke jabbed a finger at the top of the page. Jake was reminded uncomfortably of his own reaction the day before.

“He was Santiago’s source and now he’s obviously started leaking to Linetti,” Pembroke said. “If that’s not cause for dismissal-”

Wuntch held up a hand. “Do you know he was their source?”

“Yeah, I know,” Pembroke said. “Santiago wrote several stories that obviously came from Peralta.”

“But do you have proof?” Wuntch said.

Pembroke bristled. “He was the only person who could have talked to her.”

“That’s circumstantial, Captain. Do you have proof?”

Pembroke opened his mouth, closed it, and finally scowled at the commissioner.

“I’ll take that as a no,” Wuntch said. She turned to Jake. “Did you leak the material in this column to the Bulletin?”

Jake shook his head. “No, ma’am.”

“And did you leak any other stories to Ms. Santiago?”

Jake swallowed, and shook his head again. “I don’t even know her.”

“Very well.”

“You’ve got to be friggin’ kidding me,” Pembroke said. “He’s lying.”

“You have no proof that Detective Peralta had anything to do with this,” Wuntch said, tapping the newspaper. “Peralta, thank you for your time. Dismissed.”

Jake sat dazed for a second, then stood and nodded sharply at her. “Thank you, commissioner.”

Pembroke groaned and rose with him, but as they turned to walk out, Wuntch said, “Captain Pembroke, you’ll stay. We need to talk about this Vulture thing…”

If Jake hadn’t been so miserable, he would have been struggling to keep himself from grinning and high-fiving the commissioner’s secretary as he walked out, letting the door swing shut behind him.

As it was, he simply pulled out his cell phone and texted Rosa: “Shaw’s in 30. We’re day drinking. No talking.”

Rosa texted back a thumbs up immediately.

+++

They couldn’t actually drink while they were on duty, so Jake bought them Shirley Temples. They grabbed a table at the back of the bar and he told Rosa what had gone down with the commissioner, and she tapped her glass against his.

“That’s great, man.” She eyed him as he stared into the pink depths of his drink. “Or, it’s not great.”

“Amy and I broke up. I think.”

Rosa blew out a breath, and Jake prepared for the told-you-so. He figured he deserved it. He was even sort of looking forward to it, in a masochistic but weirdly reassuring way. He’d been cycling through so many emotions over the past 24 hours, shifting from anger to grief to fear to guilt, to feelings he couldn’t even identify but made his skin crawl and his stomach hurt.

In the center of them all was Amy, and the question he somehow couldn’t stop asking himself: Did he trust her? Every time he tried to answer it head on, it was like the spin cycle picked up speed, everything a blur until his mind sort of shut down and moved on.

Rosa, though – she knew the answer. She’d warned him.

Rosa was twirling her plastic straw around her drink, creating a small cyclone of her own. “You broke up with her because you think she leaked the Vulture stuff to Gina Linetti.”

Jake nodded, then shrugged. “I guess I left before we broke up, so we’re technically still together? I’m not sure.”

Rosa took a sip of her drink through the straw and scowled. She pushed the glass away, and she looked Jake straight in the eye. Jake braced himself.

“Are you sure she did it? Because it doesn’t really sound like something Amy would do.”

Jake’s stomach dropped to his feet, and he stared at her in disbelief. “You said it was a mistake to trust her. You said she only wanted to sell newspapers and that I’d regret dating her.”

“I did not say that last thing,” Rosa said, pointing a finger at him.

“But the trust part! You said that, like, so many times.”

Rosa leaned back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest. “Yes, but I meant over something important. Like, the mayor is shot and you know who the prime suspect is and you tell Amy after you guys have really great sex, and she’s like, do I betray Jake and write about the guy who tried to kill the mayor? And she decides she has to because she believes people have a right to know or some bullshit. I didn’t mean, like, some dumb gossip column about the fucking Vulture.”

Jake threw his arms up and tried very hard not to yell. “Rosa! You were never that specific!”

“I didn’t think I had to be.” Rosa cocked her head to the side, studying him. “My thoughts on Amy’s trustworthiness had nothing to do with you assuming she betrayed you. That’s not on me, Jake.”

Jake groaned and folded himself over the table, knocking his forehead against the hard surface. He picked his head up and hit it again, with a little more force. The table top was sticky. He felt Rosa awkwardly pat his shoulder a couple of times and then they said nothing for a while.

“I’m just saying, maybe you should call her,” Rosa said.

Jake moaned into the table. “I liked you better when we went for drinks and didn’t talk.”

“Same.” Rosa rapped him on the back of the head with her knuckles. “Now sit up and drink your Shirley Temple in silence like a woman.”

+++

Pembroke was still gone when they got back to the precinct an hour later. Jake sat at his desk and tugged off his tie, preparing to embrace an afternoon of apathy-slash-despondency, perhaps first by putting his head down and just ignoring the world for a while.

He frowned when three post-it notes stuck to his computer monitor caught his attention. They were all phone messages taken by the admin assistant (because Jake had never set up his office voicemail, because voicemail was annoying and people shouldn’t be encouraged to use it).

The first message was from his CI.

“Fuck,” Jake said under his breath, as he tore off the note. He’d completely forgotten that Leo had arranged for a meet that morning. Jake pulled out his cell phone and yes – there was a text too, from over an hour ago.

The second post-it note was another message from his CI. The third was from Kings County Hospital. Jake plucked off that note and stared at the neatly printed letters for a beat, then picked up his desk phone and called.

He was on hold for a while, which gave him plenty of time to beat himself up for flaking on Leo. He’d never skipped out on a CI, not once since becoming a detective and building up a loose network of informants. What if Leo had been calling for help, and was now in the morgue?

And as he kept waiting, Jake wondered if maybe the call from the hospital wasn’t about his CI at all. What if it was Amy? She could have been hit by a bus or fallen through a rusted manhole cover or been mauled by a pack of aggressive pigeons or rats. Would anyone even think to call him? What if he never saw her again?

“Hello, Detective Peralta?”

“Yes!” Jake’s voice was about three pitches higher than usual. He closed his eyes briefly and coughed. “Yes, speaking.”

“Okay, um- I’m Officer Robbins.” There was a flapping sound, of papers being flipped around. “Right, here we go. We picked up a Leo James about an hour ago.”

Jake breathed out slowly, hating himself a little for the weight that lifted off his shoulders. “Is he okay?”

“He’s going to be. He got beat up pretty bad, and he was overdosing when we found him.”

Jake frowned. Leo was a fringe associate with one of the rougher drug rings in Brooklyn, but he wasn’t really a user himself. Or he hadn’t been. “But you got him in time?”

“Yeah, gave him two hits of Narcan and he came around,” Robbins said. “We followed him over to the hospital, thought we’d see if we could get anything out of him about the beating. But he said he’d only talk to you.”

“Right, okay. Thanks.” Jake sank back in his chair and ran a hand over his face, hit by a new wave of fatigue.

“It’s actually pretty lucky we were able to revive him,” Robbins was going on. “I’ve heard Narcan doesn’t always work well with that new drug, what’s it called-?”

“Jazzy Pants?” Jake sat up straight, on instinct reaching for a notepad and a pen.

“Yeah, dumbass name for a fucked-up drug.”

“Are you sure it was Jazzy Pants?” Jake said.

“That’s what your guy told us when we got him back.”

Jake thanked Robbins again and hung up, frowning to himself. That was two of his CIs overdosing on the new drug in a couple of months. It could be entirely coincidental – overdoses were hardly uncommon among informants – but something felt off, and he’d learned to not ignore certain instincts.

He picked up the phone again to call the Seven-Eight. He didn’t actually have many good contacts over there, so when the admin picked up he asked for the first person who came to mind.

“Peralta,” said Manny Santiago. The cheer in his voice was not exactly unexpected, but it still caught Jake off guard.

“Hey, Manny, look-”

“We missed you at Thanksgiving, man.” Manny rolled right over him. “Dad had a binder on you, you know. He was not impressed with your credit score but your closure rates are fantastic. His words, not mine.”

“I- that’s weird but good?” Jake shook his head, tried to focus on why he had called and not the highs and lows of having pleased and disappointed the father of his maybe-ex-girlfriend. “Manny-”

“Oh man, what was up with that column in Amy’s paper yesterday? I’ve heard stories about Pembroke – or Captain Vul-”

“Manny!” Jake interrupted sharply. “As much as I’d love to rehash the column, and trust me, I would not, I’m actually working a case.”

“Oh sure, sorry,” Manny said. “What can I do for you?”

“I just needed to talk to someone on your Jazzy Pants task force,” Jake said. “One of my CIs OD’d today and I want to know how the investigation’s playing out, maybe there’s something we can do out of the Nine-Nine-”

“Jazzy Pants task force?” Manny said.

“Yeah, Pembroke said you guys are running it.”

“Hold on.” Jake heard muffled voices, the thump of the phone headset being set down, then finally Manny came back on. “Yeah, we don’t have a task force.”

Jake felt a weird chill, and he pressed the phone a little harder to his ear.

“Peralta?”

“I’ve gotta go,” Jake said. “Thanks, Manny.”

He hung up without waiting for a reply. Jake got up and crossed to Rosa’s desk. She was typing, but her fingers stopped when she glanced up and saw his face.

“We need to go talk to someone at Kings County,” he said.

Rosa grabbed her gun and her badge. “Let’s go.”

CHAPTER 12

#b99 fic #peraltiago #jake and amy au #newspaper au #life writes its own stories

[loopy-owl-thing]

Our side of the Story

So, we didn’t want to go public with this information. But quite frankly We’ve gotten annoyed that whilst Myself and Twi have tried to move past this whole incident quietly and maturely like adults. All this did was leave Kit to run around telling anyone who will listen to him that he has been a victim and that his partner cheated on him and ran away for no reason, etc.. We’ve gotten a bit fucking tired of it so I’m going to clear the air a bit.

A bit of background information for everyone who doesn’t know anyone mentioned here: Hi, I’m Loopy. I’m a woman in the UK who’s also extremely new to participating in the furry community, only started making furry type stuff late last year, but quietly lurked about since 2017.

Kitsune-Youkai  is a male “Popufur” artist from Florida, and popular on a furry site called Inkbunny. I discovered his art while hopping art streams one day. He was colouring a SFW picture on Picarto so I sat and watched for a while. That’s how I found his art, and spoke to Twi briefly for the first time.

Twilight AKA Twi was Kit’s writer and “girlfriend” of seven years, who lives in Oregon. Twi identified as female for a few years, but since the start of 2018 he’s been back to being his birth gender and only goes by male pronouns, with no desire to ever transition in the future. Nor did he start transitioning in the past. Any references to being called “she” in this article or screenshots are due to Kit refusing to accept his partner was male, because that’d make Kit not straight.

And he really, really hated that idea for a while.

What prompted me to start writing this the most is the surge of comment’s we’ve gotten recently of people saying things like “Gee I wish you’d get back with Kit :/” or “Things won’t be the same without Kit!” in Twi’s PM’s or comments. I got a Private Message I since deleted from a throw-away account calling me a “Home Wrecker”. But the tipping point is the fact one of my friends showed me this message they got from him after they left a vague comment on his art back in December. At first we tried to ignore it, but we’ve found Kit has been sending similar messages over the past couple months to people, some even forwarding them to Twi:

(Twi hadn’t spoken a word of his abuse to my friend, she just made an edgy comment and Kit sent this)

This is the message my friend has sent me, and the only one I will show off since she is the only one who has given me consent to show this off. Now, this is the only message I’ve seen that Kit has sent someone that’s got a grain of truth in it. Which was that he smacked Twi hard in the back of the head. But since then I’ve seen him send messages out since to people where he’s claiming “It was a small soft slap!“ or  "I didn’t hurt anyone! Honest!”

So I’m going to lay it all out in the open for people. Because it’s honestly disgusted me that he’s gotten away with this because we tried to simply move on with our lives without making a scene.

Onwards with the point of this long post then eh?

(I’m going to provide people with all the screenshots I can, I don’t have a lot of the Group Chat ones anymore after my computer crashed a while ago. It was a Discord server I ended up closing after the "big fallout" happened, And I didn’t think to archive messages via a bot at the time. Names will be blurred out if I don’t have consent for their names to be used, or my personal discord name)

((Also just clearing this up right now since I’ve seen this theory ‘cause of Kit being adamant he’s straight: Twi never catfished Kit. Kit has always known Twi was biologically a man. They lived together since the second year of their relationship, so unless Twi could tuck it in like a champion drag queen, there was no way of not knowing.

So I’m going to separate this post into a timeline of events for people since that gets muddled up the most.

May 31st 2018: I saw Twi’s ‘journal’ he made explaining his situation about how Kit refused to even care for him and found him hideous for being male.   Despite reaching out I had no intention of being his “fling”. I was at the time, happy with my own boyfriend irl that’d id been with for almost four years, and I don’t do the ‘poly’ thing, and most of all, I live in the UK. I wanted to check if things were okay between him and Kit. Because no relationship would do something like this if it was fine. I sent him a quick PM basically just saying Hi, we’ve chatted before once or twice in a live stream and if he needs to talk to someone I can probably lend an ear.

June 1st: Twi sends me a message back, saying he’d love to talk more with me, and he’d add me on discord whenever he got the chance, but currently he and Kit were getting ready to travel across the USA back to Kit’s house. I sent a couple PM’s back and forth over the next couple of nights, chatting about games and anime we liked.

June 4th: I speak to Twi on discord for the first time, we become good friends fast because we liked a lot of the same unpopular characters and played a lot of the same platformer games growing up. I meet Kit for the first time, he was talking to me using Twi’s laptop with him. He is pretty rude to me, tells me that if we’re going to “Yiff” (Had to look that one up lmao, was very new to furry terminology stuff) we had to use condoms so he could jerk off to it and enjoy the cuckoldry, and that my bird sona is ugly but it’d do if it was anthro. I was immediately grossed out by that, and I proceeded to ignore this strange conversation he was trying to have with me, and kept talking to and only responding to Twi. Kit stormed out of his and Twi’s room. Twi left a few minutes later found him attempting to break his nose and he kept screaming that we had to stop talking to one another or he’ll kill himself. Twi quickly apologized to me, saying he had to go and left the chat. I didn't know he had done this until the next day, and I soon found this was normal behavior for him when Twi did something that displeased him.

Over the next week or so they were still on the road, traveling to Kit’s house for Summer in a long car ride across the states. So I’d have very short conversations for a few minutes a night, these contained Twi on the verge of a breakdown, as Kit constantly threatening to throw himself out of a moving car because I started talking to Twi and he didn’t like it.

At one point Twi had to pull over his car because Kit took his seat belt off and swung the door open. He refused to set off driving again because he didn’t want Kit to kill himself. Their argument went on for several hours, when it was finally over Kit then blamed Twi for making the conversation last for hours without going anywhere.

I got a private message from Kit on the 11th of June, where he was angry at everyone. Saying that I had stolen his “wife” and chance of a happy future. He also claimed that Twi told him that if Kit asked him to stop speaking to me, he’d end his relationship with him. I was pretty alarmed at the idea that their marriage was falling apart but… I found out a day later that they, in fact, were not married, and he had never approached or asked Twi to marry him either. Their relationship was more akin to roommates who just barely got along but had no one better to move in with. From what I understand, Kit has only ever been “Married” to Firecat. Regardless, I apologized for everything that had been going on, because I truly felt bad for this. But I also understood what Twi had been saying, we were just friends talking and there was no reason for Kit to be this extreme. but I knew to point this out to him would not end well. So I just blindly agreed to keep the peace. This is also when I found out what he was doing about beating himself in the face.

I’ve lined areas I want to argue points on now that I know inconsistencies with what he’s saying I didn’t when he first messaged me, and the tiny black bits are my former boyfriend's name being blacked out.

Purple: Kit knew Twi was writing the Ad. He read through it, approved it and said Twi could post it. And didn’t object at all that day, or the day after, if he had Twi would have took it down instantly. It was only after Twi made friends with me and my boyfriend did this suddenly become a problem. Also! “with toys” would imply they never had to touch ever, which is alarming and fits with the fact Kit hates contact with anything. This is one of Kits biggest fetishes and its the only way he would have “physical contact“ with him. I find it deeply concerning Kit was willing to spend thousands of Patreon dollars he tells fans he needs to pay his bills, on fursuits (or more likely Twis money) just to go near his own partner that he found no attraction to, to pretend he's fucking him. What's the point in that?

Red: He was constantly talking about the abuse he sustained… To himself, by himself. In hopes that you’d stop everything and cradle him like a child. It’s one of the most noticeable things about him. He’ll shoot himself in the foot but be convinced you did it to him because you didn’t stop him. Regardless I didn’t know this at the time, so I was deeply concerned about it.

Blue: He was constantly trying to convince me and Twi himself, that Twi was broken mentally in every way. And only Kit could look after him properly. When in the short time I had spent talking to them I could clearly see which one of these two adults was... well, an adult.  It’s the only reason I’ve highlighted this.

This was my response. I apologized profusely for causing problems that I believed I had caused. I tried not to push any buttons, I did, however, point out he was refusing to speak to any of us about what had been going on, and that if he joined us to talk we could all resolve this issue he was having. This being he believed Twi was going to run off with me somehow. Despite this issue, I still really tried to be friendly towards Kit. I wanted to believe that there was something nice about this guy. I sent him my Discord username and said he should add me on that and said we could all chat in a server together, and I’d add my boyfriend too so he could see there wasn’t any “threat”. He adamantly refused every time I suggested it, insisting that he didn’t care about speaking to anyone because he hates people. He then decided to tell me about his dick instead when I tried to get him to talk about himself. (Yet he knew I had a boyfriend, I kept having to mention this to him because he kept accusing Twi of making that up.) I was a bit grossed out but still tried to be friendly as I could bring myself to be.

But in the end just left him to it, I couldn’t do much with someone who refused to talk. But I assured him my inbox was always open and my discord always on.

((This “Love’s everyone equally” thing confused me rereading it, and when I asked Twi about this he explained that Kit doesn’t believe that you can love anyone but your partner. Even in a friendship way, that’s not “love” apparently.))

So this went on for about 10 days, I spoke with Twi every day, making sure he was doing alright and trying to find things for him to focus on that weren’t causing him any more stress than what he had to deal with.  I know this all happened on the 21st because I still have these messages that shocked me:

Looking over these screenshots I’ve realized I apologized profusely even when I had not done anything. In this case, I came home from work and opened my inbox, and I felt so sorry for these guys I just said “I’m sorry” and I didn’t want it to happen because I felt put on the spot and I did still feel sorry for Kit at this point

Now  If I recall correctly, this all started because Twi wanted to send a fully clothed, normal selfie of himself to me, to show me that he’s started to look after himself again and was losing weight, I’d dare say he was taking pride in who he was finally. When he asked Kit if he could do this, and showed him this perfectly normal, ordinary selfie, all hell broke loose. He got incredibly angry, threatened to kick him out, telling him to never come back… Then quickly started “apologizing” when Twi went to leave. Spamming Twi over and over and over with things like “I’m sorry you made me get angry at you!” and that he’s the only person he ever truly loved. I kept messaging Twi during this period, who was now in a separate room because I now was extremely worried for him. I talked him down from doing anything rash to himself in frustration and said that he should probably walk away from Kit at this point. As there had not been a single day since I started speaking to Twi that Kit hadn’t blown his temper at him. Calling the relationship toxic, was an understatement.

Kit then added me on Discord, just to demand I stop speaking with Twi because I’m interfering with the breakup? :l I tried to keep this interaction light-hearted.  However. What he was actually doing, was threatening to stop making art if Twi leaves, and started telling Twi that if he stopped making art, he’d end up homeless with no money, and would have to kill himself and it’d all be on Twi! Twi got scared and stayed with him

(Screenshots say 22nd because this went on ‘till the early hours of the morning since I’m in the UK)

After that I was afraid for Twi, I felt this guy was going to start beating Twi any day now. I added both of them to a chat on Discord because I thought maybe Kit just needed to see that I’m not a bad person, and he’d relax.

So I put Kit, Twi, Myself and my partner in a chat.

Things were…Not great. Kit instantly took a disliking to my partner -who actually really enjoyed his art and was a big fan - solely for being a man and talking to Twi. He was also repulsed by one incident where my boyfriend said that he loved everyone in the chat, especially Kit despite his faults. Leading Kit to go into a long tirade about how love is an extremely strong term and that he wasn't gay and/or sexually in men... When my boyfriend had meant it platonically.

I also had to constantly explain to Kit

every, single day

that no, no one is running off with anyone. We’re all just friends and that’s how it’s gonna be. And that no, Twi isn’t going to run away to England and catch a flight to suddenly try and marry me or something.

If I had to sum up what dealing with Kit was like... It was like dealing with the spoilt, weird kid in High School. The one who never took part in anything and seemed to treat life like it was an early 80's anime, and he was the protagonist or anti-hero of said anime... And if the spoilt kid was almost ten years your senior. Every day I’d come home from work or education to see Kit yelling at or berating Twi (Over messages by the way, not in person. Kit only spoke in person if he had to, even in the same room..) over the slightest of things. Once I distinctly remember a whole argument kicking off because Twi didn’t open a window right away after he woke up, that was near Kit in their office, when he’d been up for two hours already. When I shouted at him for being childish, Kit presumed I was actually just talking about Twi, and still refused to go open this window and made Twi do it.

I started to chat to Twi in private again, often sending him jokes or just trying to calm him down in general. Anytime I called Kit out on his behavior in my chat it only escalated things. If I spoke to Twi in private about things it helped us all cope with him.

Another week passes. And Kit noticed Twi and I often spoke privately, and got very angry about this. Determined that we were gonna run off together into the sunset (Weird ‘cause as I’ve mentioned and kept mentioning to him: I'm in the UK and was still taken. He’d even met my partner now….) I constantly told him things were fine, he needs to chill out. Nothing bad is going on, just not everything has to be in a group chat. He then got really angry and tried to say he was going to “yiff” Twi in my group chat because he decided “There should be no private chats between anyone anymore.” when I calmly inquired it’s funny he’s decided that, because did he really need to know what kind of tampons I was going to ask my boyfriend to pick up for me later, he quickly took back his request for every chat everyone had to be put in the channel.

More to the point on this yiff thing and why I wouldn’t allow it. Aside from the fact it's really fucking weird to do… NSFW content was banned in there for the longest time because my boyfriend had a family computer and couldn’t look at that stuff in front of his family. I made a NSFW channel in the server and asked Kit to post art there if he wanted us to see it. So my partners family wouldn’t see anything. But he then got disgusted when we started posting other peoples art in there too and called us all gross because we weren’t allowing him to be the center of attention. In the end, he went back to posting in the main channel until I banned all NSFW stuff permanently and threatened to kick Kit out. He stopped only because he wanted to see everything me and Twi spoke about. This ban didn’t stop him from starting to send private messages to us over and over with his art in them. Later resulting in my partner having to block him because he wouldn’t stop.

So the 3rd of July: Kit and I tried talking for a while when Twi was fast asleep, and he seemed in an okay mood. As soon as Twi woke up and the two of them started arguing about the day prior. As Twi went and got dressed, I tried to calm Kit down and we chatted for a while, all seemed to be going okay. When I voiced that Twi is worried that one day he thinks Kit’s anger would get the best of him and he might attack someone, he confessed if he wanted to punch anyone it would be me. I was shocked at this and tried to turn it into a joke. He seemed miffed I didn’t take his threat seriously and went outside.

He was determined still when he got back, and said that Twi had been telling people that he would “Sacrifice” Kit for me. I presume in a figurative way and not the literal one with goats and stuff, but he never elaborated and Twi has no memory of saying this (And its not how he talked about Kit ever to me..) and went off again. Not before making himself into the victim again though.

Kit in typing this second message revealed to me he had read a private conversation Twi and I had the day previously. That he could only have possibly read by logging into Twi’s account.

For context: Yet again Kit had refused to listen to any problems Twi had been having that day with him, so I talked Twi down from being so upset and frustrated with Kit. After this I made a joke saying something like “Once again the day is saved by me!” I explained it was much easier to “save” him than it was Kit. Twi said it was much easier to “Save” me too, and preferred doing so than trying to save Kit because he knew I  wouldn’t scream at him if he suggested anything. Before Kit left again he sent me this which I guess he thought was a clever “fuck you” to me but uhhh… I’ve no idea?

I thought it was a mean spirited joke, so I just sort of said if he’s insulting me it doesn’t upset me.  Kit then said the joke was offensive to him (So why’d you fucking make it then??). I told him Twi isn’t gonna fuck anyone unless Kit was okay with it. (Not that I had plans to do so, it was a joke in response to his joke… self insult thing..) and told him to lighten up or I’d poison the KFC as an even more obvious joke. I got no response.

Twi and Kit went out to eat food, Twi gave Kit his phone to hold while at KFC because he often would forget or lose it in public places. Thing’s seemed fine, they got back however and started arguing in the car on the way back. Whatever it was about, Kit refused to back down as usual so Twi got extremely frustrated with him.

Twi got out and left Kit in the car, as he said he wanted to listen to music/something on the station he said he wanted to listen to. Twi went into the office, and sat down and told me what had happened over PM's. He was very frustrated and distressed, as he was starting to understand Kit didn't love him.

So I tried to cheer Twi up and made some jokes about how uptight Kit was. Things like how he really needed to stop acting like a wind-up toy with the key lodged in its ass, that sort of thing. What neither of us knew is that Kit had kept ahold of Twi’s phone, and logged into Twi’s discord on the phonewithout permission to do so, and watched us talking, saw these jokes I made, and that I had said me and my boyfriend were getting annoyed with how he’s being shitty and childish to everyone and expecting everyone to be nice in return, no consequences for his actions in sight. I suggested that he should try and take Kit to therapy.

He then snapped when Twi laughed at some of my jokes, he stormed into the house and accused Twi of cheating, and then started screaming that no one loves him. Twi attempted to tell him this wasn’t true, and Kit continued to yell and berate Twi for being “a whore.” (I thought Kit liked those though since that’s all he ever portrays women as ) Twi laughed in shock, and gave up, turned his back on him to go back into the office, and that’s when Kit smacked him in the back of the head, making his glasses fly off and onto the floor, the glass of one of his lenses popped out on the floor, and this caused his vision to go funny for a few seconds:

He blamed everyone else for what he just did, then demanded that Twi leave forever this time and that he’d never ever make art again and close his Patreon this is where this journal came from:

Sorry, it’s struck out, hopefully, you can still read this tantrum he had.

The rest of the chat me and Kit had that day is right here. He quickly started to do suicide baiting with me. Any attempts I made to point out the seriousness of what he just did aka physical assault was ignored. Then started implying Twi might have killed themselves to make me upset:

(I’ve lost close friends to suicide, so has Twi. It’s not a fucking joke or something you yell at your loved ones to scare them into obeying you. Anyone who does that is garbage. I was at a complete loss of what to say to this guy.)

(Rereading these, it honestly horrifies me anyone could talk so coldly about their partner of 7 years..)

So Twi left, apparently, this was him picking “Me over Kit” and not because he had just been assaulted and thrown out by Kit and his family, no that can’t be right, can it? Nah, obviously it was all of us who abused poor Kit.

Twi got shoved out the house late at night/early morning, and his screen monitor got cracked in the process. Twi went to a hotel to spend the night, crying and confused. I pulled an all-nighter to stay up and talk to him, advising him to be careful with his head and maybe stay up a bit later than normal to avoid concussion, and started to help him figure out the best journey home.

Kit, realized there was a good chance Twi was going to actually leave. Which meant he’d be alone with no one to beat up anymore.

He started messaging his discord frantically, saying that Twi needs to come back right now or he’ll kill himself and the fans will never get art ever again. Exploiting Twi's weakness of always wanting to please people. Twi caved in because he really thought he’d do it this time, and didn't want fans to hate him, and went back to him. All this did was cement in Kit’s head he could do whatever he wanted from here on out. He’d got to bully and abuse his partner and got away with it all. And I couldn’t do a thing about it.

Kit then made the new journal, demanding a ton of pity from all the fans, making it seem like it was just a little hiccup everyone! Nothing bad happened ever! Twi’s just soooo silly for trying to leave him for no reason, I really love him her! teehee! Kit and Twi are the best nothings wrong BTW thanks for giving me more money on patreon. I cried all night because of you guuuys. Feel free to blame Twi and speculate uwu

I'm never going to forget that day.

All while he played the victim to his fans, he bitched and moaned in private to us all, not even 12 hours later how he had to replace this monitor he just broke.

Honestly, I cried myself to sleep that night Twi went back, most of the day too. I was so worried for Twi’s safety every single day after that, I’d rush home from work and education to make sure he hadn’t been hit again. Or Worse. After this incident, I got in touch with one of Twi and Kits mutual friends, and they joined the chat and would more or less stop them fighting best he could while I wasn’t there.

Oh and you want to know what Kit told Twi, as to why he hit him? That he believed he had brain cancer that was making him violent because he got headaches a lot.

(Blocked out a bit of text that seemed far too personal and not public information I don’t think, so I wasn't sharing that)

I explained to Twi that its convenient he suddenly has Brain Cancer and has no side effects of hair loss, weight loss, vomiting, or any other of the horrifying side effect of this being left untreated for years. Just a nasty fucking temper. Twi quickly dropped it when he agreed that I was right but didn’t want to say in front of Kit. Weirdly enough, Kit never brought this up again to me after this day. Almost like he made it all up… (Twi has since corrected me that Kit has claimed on and off for years he had brain cancer because of the headaches he would get from staring at screens all day… It was the only reason he could come up with as to why he’d get head pain doing that…)

Twi said in the middle of an argument one day that he bet Kit would be happy if something happened to me. Kit agreed that he wished I’d just drop dead or die in a plane crash. Then got angry Twi was disgusted by that reaction, and angrier after that when he told me.

I just said “Thank’s for telling me” because I was just so shocked by this whole situation,  I had no idea what else to say, and anything I did say would have resulted in a bad situation for Twi to deal with. He then tried to claim Twi said this to justify wanting me dead:

(Found these two screenshots in a folder when digging to see if I still had any, hence why they have current-ish dates on them) It got to the point I stopped being able to post my own art in my own server because just seeing anything I posted in there, even terrible anatomy practice scribbles or terrible first attempts at sprite art would cause him to get upset, and he’d tell Twi to leave him because in a couple of years my art would surpass his, then he’d stop making art and you can all guess what he’d say would happen after that by now. :l

Kits behavior got worse and worse towards everyone, not even his friend was safe from being treated like shit.

On the 31st of July I got home from work to get messages from Kit insisting that Twi had been trying to “fingerfuck“ him and didn’t allow him, but then kept saying that Twi was so mentally unstable he believed that Kit’s left hand was "Firecat" and uh... Well... No idea if it is anywhere else in the world. But Finger Fucking is slang for Fingering in the UK. So, here’s me at the late hours of the night thinking I’d just read some sexual assault claim about Kit’s ass and Twi having gone crazy on him.

Kit was adamant that he felt violated over these events too and wouldn’t shut up about it in my group chat, and Twi was so fed up with this childish behavior, he wasn’t talking in the group chat. So I spent my afternoon attempting to sort this out in PM’s.

“Autistic Robot Mode” is how Kit would describe Twi any time Twi got upset with Kit, and would attempt to ignore his temper tantrums while trying to calm down. I asked Twi to explain to me what had happened, he sent me this chat log that the two of them had an hour or so before I answered my messages. Twi attempted to talk to Kit about him taking things too far over him doing hand gestures with him, and Kit had “Firecat” to speak to him about rape.

I like how Kit's ignoring all Twi's points and trying to make this about consent.... Over hands touching. After being with him for seven years.

Never in my life, even from the most abused of people I’ve met over the years, have I ever. EVER heard of someone trying to tell people holding hands and doing silly gestures was similar to sexual assault. Twi brought up his understandable and valid concerns about Kit constantly pretending to be Firecat to justify his own actions. (And I’ve had one other person who’s known him IRL has also confided to me they said to him the best thing Kit could do for himself is stopping what he’s doing with Firecat, but he refuses to each time insisting it’d “Kill” Firecat. )

Finally one day after work on the 14th of August I’d had enough and stopped being nice back.

Kit got really angry at me over the stupidest fucking thing. I told him you can’t sell porn games on Steam. He tried to argue Hunie Pop was just porn. I explained that no, it was a game and it sold really, really well because it was an addictive puzzle game with cutesy anime girls in it doing lewd things and attractive Youtubers played it and pretending it was just like porn so dumb little 13-year-olds would buy it.

(Just incase anyone didn’t know what this was, here ya go)

He got madder because he couldn’t accept the game sold really well because it got taken down for a short period of time… Which happened years after it came out after it made its majority sales… I explained if it didn’t do really well it wouldn’t have gotten a spin-off game and a sequel in the works. Twi agreed with me, as did their friend and my boyfriend. This made his temper worse and worse. Because if you aren't with Kit, you are clearly against him.

Things soon escalated into Kit saying it was Twi and the friend’s fault that he would never get anywhere in life because a project fell through. (Which he never paid any of them to work on..) and that they were both useless and he hates the fact he even has to pay a tiny fraction of his earnings for Twi to write for him…  Which I just found out he never did anyway! 

Sorry for this interjection. But Twi has been reading and fact-checking this post for me before I post it, and he has explained to me that didn’t get paid once for working on the comics.

(Kit used to have a donation goal on his Patreon, and it said at around $300 he could then afford to pay Twi $50 a month. When this donation goal was met, Kit would go to pay Twi. But instead of just transfer money to his bank account and that’d be that, he’d go up in person then say things like “B-but remember I’m down on money this month, and/or I need it to pay for x and y. but if you really have to take it I  guess.. I can go without... even though you have money..."  basically, guilting him out of accepting money.  Money that Twi had more than earned, and Twi didn’t have much money either but it didn't stop Kit pulling this. So Twi would refuse to take this money because he didn’t want Kit to suffer over bills because he genuinely loved him.)

So after Kit’s outburst, I’d had enough. I told Kit I was sick of him abusing everyone around him yet somehow still being the victim. And that how he treats everyone is disgusting. Especially Twi. His partner he apparently loves and treasures, but in reality, he only keeps him around for free slave labor. This is the only screenshot I have left of the chat, taken after we all told him to stop being an asshole to everyone and victimizing himself

(This resulted in this chat going down. This is the only screenshot I have left of the group chat, as my pc hard crashed a few months back, and I lost screenshots of logs I’d kept that I hadn’t backed up. The only reason I still had access to this was that it was in a folder I back up every month. (Black is the friend who joined the chat, Brown is me. Small bit blacked out is ex’s username.)

After this Kit lost it again with Twi.

Demanding again Twi stops speaking to me for a few months so they could “repair their relationship” Twi didn’t want to agree to this but felt he had to because Kit was in such a violent rage again. It lasted a couple of days before Twi fell into a deep depression. He was having panic attacks as frequent as five a day. And it dawned on him that this was his final attempt to isolate Twi from getting better and seeking help. Kit made no effort in this time to try and repair things with him either, and if anything ignored him even more.

Twi unblocked me around three days later and apologized for feeling he had to shut me out. I forgave him of course and we went back to talking like normal. Kit refused to join a new chat I offered to make and blocked me. He’d then spend his time getting angry whenever he saw Twi talking to anyone on discord. Even if it wasn’t me. He’d lose his temper if he so much as heard Twi typing. He’d blare loud music constantly at him or yell at him when he did something Kit didn’t like and would constantly watch him typing when he could, then claim innocence if Twi caught him out reading his messages.

If he was feeling particularly more abusive than normal, he’d lock Twi out of the office after screaming he was going to end it all, forcing Twi to sit and panic in the hall for hours on end before he’d emerge, perfectly fine and demand food.

This became Twi’s life for the next month, until near the end of September. Twi finally understood what a terrible situation he was in, and as he no longer had any feelings for Kit and hadn’t for a long time, only staying out of fear that Kit would do something to himself, and he had to leave no matter what Kit threatened to do.

So on September 21st Twi left Kit for good, walked out of his life and made his way back home. However, he still tried to speak to Kit as friends in hopes this would help him. Kit refused to acknowledge they had broken up at all for many days.

On the 24th When Twi tried to ignore him and keep making his travel across the US home, Kit then unblocked me and started to hound me. He lied about Twi wanting us to now “be friends.” I figured this was a lie and wasn’t having any of this behavior anymore. So I didn’t respond happily to him, and he quickly stopped pretending to be nice back. I was pretty rude, but also… I didn’t care at this point. Not after this shit I knew my friend was going through.

He accused us all of lying to him because Twi left him. Sorry “is Leaving” him. I guess him packing up and going three days ago and saying they had broken up isn’t clear enough.  He also refused to apologize for anything he has said or done to anyone in my chat. He thinks saying sorry for hitting Twi was acceptable when he shows no remorse for it, only remorse that Twi left him.  He got it into his head that I had abandoned my boyfriend for Twi too no matter what I’d said. We went round in a loop for a couple hours.

(I didn’t ask him to feel sorry for me. He just decided to talk about himself and explain how NOT sorry he is for anything he’s done.)

Twi woke up and came online, and confirmed what I had suspected.

I assured Twi everything was fine, and I didn’t want him to worry about me finally giving Kit a proper piece of my mind. But all while I was doing this, I gave Kit multiple chances to at least admit that he didn’t want to change or do things out of his comfort zone, because while I can’t stand lazy, partner abusing assholes. I can at the very least then go. “Well, at least you were honest about this.” But he never did, hence why in some screenshots here I am saying “You did it again.” because I kept telling him to stop making excuses for his actions and pinning everything on Twi or Depression.

So I brought up something that had been on my mind the whole duration I knew the two of them. If Kit was so deeply concerned about Twi’s mental state as he said he was. And was worried about his apparent inability to care from himself, or tell reality apart from fiction. Which he clearly thought after that whole ordeal about finger fucking... Why was he still parading Firecat around, and pretending she was his real girlfriend after all these years? Why would you do this if you really believed your partner of almost a decade had a psychotic break and needed constant care because they couldn’t consent to anything? (terrible spelling because I was trying to juggle five chats at once.)

Well because my friends, here’s a Spoiler Alert: He was the one with the delusions that needed feeding, and he never gave a rats ass about Twi’s mental health like he claims he did. He can argue all he wants about that. He insists he knows Firecat isn’t real, and fair enough, that much is obvious. But he still treats her like she is.. And that's my point to him. No one would give a rats ass about her if he didn't treat her better than those in reality. But no whenever I brought up a good point to him, he immediately deflected it and tried to blame Twi.

(Just asked Twi who all these 12+ people are in his head he apparently has. He explained they are characters he's told me about. Who he doesn't treat as real people nor have had verbal conversations with them, or anything similar to what Kit does with Firecat and I've never seen him do it. He just thinks and writes about them when stressed. Which he frequently was with Kit.)

Also, sorry anyone who’s ever jerked off to Firecat porn... But Kit finds it way creepier that any of you have ever openly lusted over Firecat, than the fact he treats his imaginary fuckbuddy better than real people. Again showing he cares more about fiction than anything else.

1. The previous context for this is that he thinks I’m the creepy human being because I dont call myself a furry, (I merely produce art for the community and thats as far as my involvement gets) and he tried to say that if Twi’s character is a Yoshi and mine is an anthro bird that’s creepy because...?

Keep in mind we weren’t together at this point either! He was trying to do more deflecting

I was gonna gloss over this. But after rereading this screenshot a few times, It’s really fucking hilarious and hypocritical him blurting this out as a desperate attempt to annoy me somehow, since Kit, I know that your current Condom Crusader comic is currently about a feral dog turning anthros into ferals and fucking them. Now I can only show small parts because I don’t want readers to vomit, (and in every panel there's weird dicks and gross looking wound looking pussies so I tried to crop best I could) but here we go, under the cut:

And your previous comics are either you and your dragsona fucking “feral” yoshis, or having THE Yoshi from Mario games fuck Princess Peach. Y’know a human on an animal?

“B-but Loopy! Thats just firecat! Shes not real. Kit would never do it himself-”

As well as art of yourself and Firecat as ferals, or one of you as a feral and the other anthro.

“Am I... PREGANTE?!“

Also fantastic art here if I must say my good buddy Kit, it’s been my reaction image of choice when someone mentions you this past week.

And I know around 70% of your Patrons and fans like ferals too. I spoke to a few of them to make this post. So tell me Kit, are they all creepy too? Oh and there is stuff I'm not gonna post here for legal reasons, but the stuff with Shippo? That stuff with Lilo and Stitch? Remind me who draws that? Those are clearly children getting done by or fucking animals Kit. Is that not creepy either? Lemme guess it’s only creepy unless you draw it or do it. Then it's perfectly fine, right? You never do wrong am I right? All this hatred and these names, this couldn’t be projecting...Could it?... Nah that's crazy.

(E621 is your friend if anyone really has to see proof, don't blame me if the FBI kicks down your door.)

2..Twi was only “Okay” with Firecat, because he thought it was some harmless fantasy and wouldn’t affect you negatively as a person, and wouldn't affect reality, because Twi is chill like that. (Kit’s only started being open that she's not real very recently from what I've seen. Again saying “Me and Cat” though...)

Anyway, In the end, I got so tired of this I blocked Kit, so he went back to harassing Twi.

He told Twi he was throwing up blood, he was going to die alone thanks to Twi if he didn’t get back here right fucking now. When he had given himself a stomach ulcer from constantly screaming and shouting after Twi left. He then started telling Twi frantically that his family were going to have him live with family friends until he calmed down, claiming "I was depressing them." so he ““needed”” Twi to come back and look after him, acting like that would be the end of him and he'd go homeless.

When this didn’t happen, Kit then started making alts to previous pictures of Firecat dressed as a Pink Yoshi's in some bizarre attempt to show he still loved Twi… This also didn’t work. Kit then went out of his way to draw a picture and send it to Twi, in an even bigger, creepier attempt to woo him back. All this did was frustrate Twi, as it was the last thing he wanted to see at this point.

Kit continued to pester and prod at Twi over the week, trying to find something that’d make him cave in and crawl back to him. Still refusing to acknowledge Twi had left him several days after the fact Twi told him REPEATEDLY that it was over:

(As you can see this screenshot I took of us talking was on the 26th of September. Five days later from the break-up. And two days after He spoke to me, determined Twi and I were now “mates” :l)

Kit directly after this, all while Twi was heading home, tried begging Twi to do sexual RP’s with him, insisting that he’d never get an erection again without him or something. And was disgusting and confused when every time Twi refused. Twi explained they are no longer together, and he doesn’t want to do them anymore.

So he started telling Twi that he’ll always love him. This pissed Twi off, but he refused to stop, often saying it hurt him too much to not say it. :l

Twi eventually got home with his family and tried to distance himself from Kit as much as he could while still working on that god-awful comic we still cringe at when we are reminded of its existence.

I almost left this out, but Twi mentioned it in his journal and should be elaborated on: He was often made to work on these comics after Kit was done screaming at him and verbally abusing him for long periods of time, often hours on end. Then after a rough plot was finally agreed on, scripts would be written out, then it was up to Kit to do the art. But Kit would then demand last-minute re-writes for minor or fabricated reasons after he’d drawn the pages. So if the comics ever read like a jumbled mess, now you know why. See, He’d always leave the faces ‘till last. You could see him do this on live streams, so at the last minute, he could then accuse Twi of being a shit writer because now the art didn’t match the script. It got so bad the last few months before he left, that Twi often was made to rewrite the whole script over, even if the first couple of pages had just been produced. These rewrites would take five to six hours each time he was made to redo it. The only comic I know this didn’t happen on was that Spike and Rarity comic he was paid to work on and it had been fully planned out before he could draw the pages, as it was a commission.  

On this comic in particular, he was writing while still stuck with Kit, was the “Condom Crusader” prequel. Problems arose because Twi didn’t make the totes lovable Kitsune and Firecat more likable than Twi.

When in reality, what happened was Kit would draw the characters differently from the script and layout that was agreed on, on purpose because he wanted Firecat and Kit to always be rude to Twi because he loved that stupid love triangle plot where he was worshipped and seen as the cool cocky hero, and Twi got shat on for existing and bullied by him for no reason. A perfect reflection of their real relationship actually… Kit got really confused that no one found him likable in the comics after the changes he made, so he kept demanding worse and worse things happen to Twi as punishment, which only made fans sympathize with Twi more, thoroughly pissing Kit off. That’s not an exaggeration, that’s really why that comic got as dark as it did, go look at the earlier pages and comments. It was supposed to be the Eggmaker back story, but he demanded it became about Firecat five pages in because he always cared more about his fictional life and wife than his real partner, and was mad people were worried about Eggmaker.

So he made his real partner out to be a jealous psychotic rapist while he never did anything wrong ever.

Here’s one example I found, of him publicly getting annoyed and trying to nudge his fans into arguing with Twi.

Here is another making it into a joke that he fights with Twi, which I'm sorry, but when you have a fanbase that’s not okay to do. You are painting a colleague as the bad guy/idiot, and many people do latch onto that and take it seriously (a good example would be the “Goddamnit Ross” thing from GameGrumps, and how fans quickly took that too far.):

(I just noticed he posted that on the 27th of June. 6 Days later he hit Twi… )

Around the start of October of this constant bullshit Twi was enduring still from Kit whenever he was awake, I started to notice a difference in Twi. Whenever Kit wasn’t hounding him on Discord and it was just us talking, Twi was outgoing and happy. But the second Kit was awake and pestering him, Twi was always twitchy and aggressive, scared still even though he was on the other side of the country. But I couldn’t blame Twi when Kit was constantly sending him messages like this:

After that, I told Twi he needs to block Kit, because this wasn’t doing anyone any good. Not Kit, not Twi, not me, not their friends, not either of anyone’s family around them. At first, Twi argued against doing this and tried to speak to Kit one more time, but whatever was said in that conversation made Twi see the light, that Kit couldn’t be helped by Twi. That Kit wasn’t the prey in this situation, but a skilled predator luring anyone in he could. So Twi said his goodbyes and blocked him on Discord. A week later he blocked him on other sites too. Then took a step back from most of his social media because he knew the fallout would be immense if he stayed. Kit had all the fans, he could tell what he wanted. So he hoped if he was quiet he’d stop and leave us alone.

The change in Twi’s mood and mental state was almost instantaneous, he was still very anxious, abuse victims always are. But he was no longer looking around when in video calls like he was going to be hit or in danger anymore.

October 23rd I broke up with my boyfriend. Things weren’t working out with him anymore and I wanted to move forward with new experiences and start a new career path, etc. After a few hours of late night talking with Twi, Twi suggested that we try an online relationship together due to how close we’d gotten after he became single, and if it didn’t work out it’d be no big deal for either of us to walk away. I was concerned because I was fresh out of a relationship, and I didn’t know how a long distance thing would even work. So I thought about it for a couple nights.

On October 27th I decided to see if a long distance relationship with him could work. And we’ve been together since. We met for the first time in person on May 11th. We have our ups and downs, but we are very happy together, and slowly working on making things work in the future.

My Final words on this:

Kit, Twi does not want anything to do with you ever again. He doesn’t want to talk to you, be your friend, etc. Ever. Period.

Stop running around telling people you were justified for hitting Twi. It’s fucked up and laying a hand on anyone is never justified. Oh and Yes, I’m aware of that one time he pulled your headphones off of your head after you completely ignored him, then you stood up and shoved him into your desk as a response. Just because you made Twi say it was a justified reaction, doesn’t mean it’s true.

Please just leave us alone, we tried to leave you alone and mind our own business for over six months now, and make our own art in peace. You’ve gone around messaging people that you’re the victim, and how everyone betrayed you, and we’ve had enough.

I really hope that one day you seek out anger management classes or therapy for your problems, and then you can grow as an adult and have people around you.

My advice to start would be that it is best for you if you give up this whole thing with Firecat. Stop acting like she’s real, stop treating her better than how you treat real people. And yes, you do that, we all know it, because both people I know who know you In real life have told me that too, as well as a third person Twi informed me you met who you immediately got hostile with because they were his friend.  They know how you would have conversations out loud with her. Among other things… Just give her up, and move on with your life. Go out and meet people in the real world. At a gaming convention or something, it’s fun and you wouldn’t stand out there.

If anyone still wants to support Kit, after all this then so fucking be it. I simply wanted people to be aware what he’s done to us and other people, because when people stay silent on these kinds of incidents, all it does is allow predators to do this again and again.

#kitsune youkai #firecat #kit #condom crusader #furry #artist beware #furries beware #f no furries #not safe for life #kitsune-youkai #18+ #furries #furry drama #tw abuse #tw assault #inkbunny