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#i belive in you

I think something people don’t get about growing as a person is that your just trying to rewire your brain.

Everytime I used to get a lactose induced stomach ache my anxiety would spike through the roof and stay there until I went to bed. Now it only spikes for like, 5 minutes until I realize why and I start to calm down.

It’s just slowly working on your immediate reaction to situations and making them good ones and not bad ones

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Sou de dualidade, de sinceridade, de amor e de coração. Mas não mente pra mim, não tenta me fazer de otária,sei ser precisa, objetiva e necessária. Meu coração é meu, mas pode ser nosso, só não pode ser só seu; pois não confio em ninguém à ponto de arriscar meu coração. Sou filha do amor e amante da razão quando é preciso… Posso te mostrar meu céu, ou criar um paraíso pra você, só não me machuque propositalmente, nem eu conheço completamente a minha mente, posso te amar, mas se me magoar, sou capaz de te esquecer de um jeito diferente. Sou de amor, mas antes de amar qualquer um, me amo, e se me irrito quando zombam do meu amor é porque exijo respeito por ele. Sou de dualidade, mas em minhas metades não ofereço maldade naturalmente, se brotar maldade da minha mente é reflexo de sua atitude comigo, aí é problema teu amigo (a). Fora minha necessidade de ser tratada com delicadeza, me ter ao lado é uma dádiva, uma riqueza, um presente da natureza!

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✨2020 Lesson✨

Now that it’s 2020, I think it’s time for a reminder that everyone has the ability and right to grow. Remaining the same person your entire life constricts you from becoming a better version of yourself. If you’re unhappy about something in your life, change it. If you don’t have control over it, change something you can control. I came into 2020 with a haircut and a tattoo because I’m stressed out about my future, and honestly it felt really good. So get spontaneous. Take charge of yourself. Do the things you want simply because they make you happy. “New year, new me” is completely unrealistic, but changing parts of yourself to conform to the person you’re growing into is important. The ability to change is a power we were gifted, not an affliction we were plagued with.

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I’m just an angel who likes to wear black things. But that was not me before I was a lost child who did not know what to do with life. But I just keep watching and then I find out I’m an angel who loves black stuff. I love to help people. I do not want to see her sad. I want to see a smile. And I know it’s okay to be sad or angry, but that does not mean we should finish it. I love my friends and the best that I know they are gone. But I know that one day I can see her and enjoy the time we spent together. I love one of my best friends. I want to see her happy that I know she is not gone. Because I do not really know what to do without her, she is the main reason why I’m still alive. (If you’re reading this princess, I love you so much and I do not want to lose you, I’ll be there for you if you need me.) So somehow I have a crazy Story, but I’ll later tell maybe to all the people who sad, depression i love you people and i believe in you can do it and be proud as i can survive the worst times.

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I literally feel like shit right now. For breakfast I ate an apple (~80) and a Yogurt (~60). Then we drove to a city at the Loire. Of course we had to go to a restaurant for lunch! And they had no kid meals! So I ate raw Salmon with a baked potato and a little bit of salad (~450). BUT THEN WE HAD TO GO TO A PATISSERIE!

And I couldn’t not eat because my mum already bought it while I was waiting outside…

So I ate it. And then I looked it up.

~450 calories and it was so small!

Then we were back in the holiday home and we ate dinner. And I ate a lot. But after dinner I always throw up so yeah, I don’t count it…

And then I ate the apple I bought for tomorrow morning! So another 80 calories!

I feel like shit and do you know this feeling when you just sit and you feel all the fat on your stomach and on your legs. It’s awful. I hope I’m not the only fat weirdo.

Stay save and if you haven’t heard it already:

I know it’s hard to believe for yourself but I think you look gorgeous just the way you are. Yes, you too! But I also understand that you want to change. If it’s for you or for others. Just try to stay safe! Much, much love to ya’ll! <3

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