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#i mentioned saying i havent made a plan but i have came up with something small which is going ice skating with
donghoonie-3 · 1 year
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Panicking rn 💀
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jaemified · 6 months
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I COULD NEVER LIE TO YOU.
“maybe i finally understood why you were the way you were. or maybe you just never tried to understand me.”
☆ pairing ; toxic bf lee chan x fem reader
☆ genre ; hurt, ANGST, no comfort, toxic relationship, y/n vents but she has no one, slightly suggestive content
☆ warnings ; swearing, drinking, implied substance abuse, mentions of cheating and sex, y/ns insecure af (and only cz he made her that way), chans a gaslight and manipulator but also very possessive !!
☆ wordcount ; 0.9k
☆ synopsis ; youve been struggling with a toxic relationship for years now, but you had no one to tell that to, or anyone thatd believe you at least. so while your boyfriend slips out for the night to god knows where, you use this time to write down and express everything youve bottled up all this time.
☆ kona speaks ! - i think its funny how i always start with swearing in cw when its not anywhere near the worst thing in the story LMAOAOAOA anyway sorry i havent uploaded in FOREVER.. college is so hard (+i love my new format! all my drafts from the past 2 months are written like this:))
!disclaimer!, this is a pure work of fiction and is not in any way related to chan and his personality! purely for entertainment purposes only, and for me to express some thoughts :)
READ BELOW THE CUT
OCTOBER 31, 2023
you had left me on my own yet again. its not like i had any true friends left to be with anyway, after you scared them all off, that is.
who knows where you couldve gone.
no, the real you.
my sweet, sweet channie i fell in love with all those years ago.
where could you have gone?
maybe i wasnt good enough, maybe i wasnt pretty enough.
or maybe you werent understanding enough.
i always thought it was me, but maybe it was you all this time.
i like to think back at when we were last happy, god. that mustve been ages ago, just about.
it was.. my 16th birthday?
-my 16th birthday-
it was.. the day we had to put my dog down. my puppy since i was young. i remember it all clearly now.
i was..
-i was..-
we, we were 17.
mmm, my dog was probably my best friend. the realest one in a while.
i remember how you were there for me, even took me to my favorite donut shop to distract me while you tried so hard to make me laugh.
it worked.
i wish you were still you when we were young.
my sweet channie.
where could you have gone?
i could care less about your whereabouts.
i could care less about how you told me i was lying and that you knew i loved you whenever i tried expressing how i felt about us now.
but maybe i just want to be loved again.
maybe i just want to feel something again.
and i know it cant be with you.
i remember the last time you brought me out we were at mingyus halloween party last year.
nobody could find you, so i went to look for you myself.
i noticed your location was still shared with me, and not any of your friends.
so i tracked you to our car.
-our-
i tracked you to your car.
(since nothing that was yours was mine anyway)
and there you were.
fucking some random girl in the backseat.
that was the last day i saw any of my friends.
you never let me out again.
“you cant go, youll just be in my way.” you said before you left for soonyoungs christmas party.
“you cant go, i cant bare to see you hurt again.” you told me before i was about to leave to my own birthday party planned by my friends.
“you cant go, youll just play victim in front of all my friends and cry about how i fucked another girl.” you told me before you left a few hours ago.
i never know with you. but, i know deep down you care.
somewhere.
its always how y/n cant go here, y/n cant do this. or, shes too busy, we have something planned, shes not home.
even in the way you always spoke over me i knew you were just trying to speak for me.
but what about you?
why cant i have a say in anything you do? why do i get everything taken from me? why did you scare off all my friends and even make your friends hate me too?
you always came home high or on something whenever a different girl each time, dropped you off after you came back from a different party.
i never missed the way theyd look at me.
as if you said something about me.
because you know i never forget the look on someones face
it wasnt till later when i found out from wonwoo that everything you did to me, you told those girls thats what i did to you.
i learned to be quiet though.
i learned to sit there and smile, and just take it.
there was nothing i could do though, theres nothing that couldve changed your actions.
i mean, i cant control you.
so why can you control me?
the channie i knew from when we were 20 wouldve consoled me and been there for me.
the channie i knew from when we were 15 wouldve just laughed about how mr seo accidentally buzzed his head in the boys locker room.
the channie i knew from when we first met in grade school wouldnt even have thought about doing half the things you do now.
so where did we go wrong?
i still think about that.
was it, when we hit puberty?
was it, when we moved out?
was it, when we graduated?
our first date?
the day i found out you cheated?
y/n scoffed as she looked at the giant brown teddy bear in the corner of the room that chan had won for her on their first date.
she let out an annoyed sigh, thinking back, looking back at whatever point in time that couldve even reflected a glimpse of this change in him.
it was too subtle, but too sudden, for her to even remember.
she took a sip of her ginger ale before picking up her pen and scribbling some more in her diary that only she had the key to.
who knows what he’d do if he saw all the things she said about him.
you really werent much help.
nevertheless, i still love you.
i really fucking love you.
i know you do too.
i know a part of you inside still cares for me.
i could even cry thinking about it.
yeah, i realize i dont get out much.
but you never hurt me.
physically, at least.
the emotional damage is beyond repair though.
but i know theres still a bit of the you from our youth left.
i see it in the way you look at me.
no matter how mad,
how upset,
how happy,
how sad you were,
whether you were high,
whether you were drunk,
even when we were younger too.
you always looked at me the same.
that softened gaze and warm eyes.
the eyes never change. the eyes dont lie.
i mean, you could deny it (which id only laugh if you tried), but your eyes tell.
maybe thats why im still holding on.
maybe im just waiting for the boy i first fell in love with to randomly come back.
the chances are slim.
but i still hope.
im holding on.
by a thread, at least.
not like you’d let me leave anyway.
i could say how theres still love left within us
probably, somewhere
but when was the last time we were genuinely happy?
what do you get out of this?
because it isnt happiness. it cant be. you wouldnt be here if you were.
we’re both miserable. i see it and feel it.
it’s like, im just here for you.
i can understand the pressure though.
everyone would ask “how did you make it through college?” “how did you make it through high school?”
they dont understand though. you kinda made me
-you kinda made me-
they dont understand though.
i mean,
maybe i finally understood why you were the way you were
or maybe you just never tried to understand me.
i could tell you all of these things.
but i couldnt.
because i could never ‘lie’ to you.
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writinandcrying · 1 year
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2007 TMNT Movie Review
ok so i watched 2007 movie for the first time (ive read about it and seen some scenes, but never watched the whole thing) anyways finally got a hold of myself and watched it! Specially bc of 3 reasons
1- i need to cuz to fr wtf
2- bc of a certain match up 👀 @melancholysway
3- aaaand I wanted to visualize better a 10 part scenario COF COF @melancholysway hi babe
i decided to write down my comments (i usually dont comment on movies but me and jas talked SO MUCH about it i wanted to do this lmao) basically if you have seen the film (and love it like a certain someone) you will be able to recognize the scenes from the my comments without detailed description, TW spoilers if you havent watched it!
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Leo’s voice is HOT. mmhhmmOHMYGOD
Raph's movements and bike scenes are so smooth I love it
“sir im not playing hard to get this is not that kind of phoneline” ON A CHILDRENS MOVIE???????? KHBADKNJLJ
Donnie with his huge ass googles he’s so cute
APRIL???? SHORT HAIR APRIL?? CHANNEL APRIL??? SUIT APRIL??? Move aside Casey im down on one knee
I love the entrance to the lair, also I love when tmnt versions mix like subway stations with he sewers you know? Gives a perception that it isn’t so gloomy where they live and all
“I can’t even sleep without the sound of the subway rumbling above my head, i guess that’s what you get when you grow up on a house full of brothers” soft king we love to see it
Leo jumping out of a plane - AGAIN - like on the bayverse movies, every version he’s an adrenaline rookie istg
Raph diving on the elevator was fucking badass ngtl
SPLINTER SINGING WHILE 1 SECOND AGO THEY WERE ALL BEEFING LMAO PEAK SIBLING REP
Leo mispronouncing nightwatcher like a 40 y/o
Thinking out loud here I kinda wanted to know how they defeated The Shredder tho 
im gonna be honest...... besides rottmnt April..... i dont usually dig her, i always thinks theres some spice laking to her character, (bayverse included, sorry Megan Fox my queen) idk it feels the writers always go for miss perfect with her which doesn't give the character some interesting characteristics besides being "the perfect girl who's also the only one in the group" its lazy writing and it pisses me off. but this April??? i kinda like it! and her 2 LIL BUNS WHILE SHES TRAINING JDNJLA SHES SO CUTE
- “WHAT WAS THAT?” ”did I mention we ran into a monster last night’?” “oh you forgot buddy, did you also forget I only have a WODEN BAT?” im loving this Casey lmao 
“And now we got walking statues??? You got a plan for those?””hey those are a first for me too” WHO WROTE THIS MOVIE
Thinking out loud here part 2 the comeback - Like the only thing I miss is a more mature mikey I think? Everyone sort of grew up and have more mature lines, and he still on the "Yo dude” teenage phase, like idk if feels they all are in their mid/late 20s and Mikey still a 16 y/o :/ I wish writers would give him more development, or more clever lines? like clever pun lines if he's gonna be the comedy relief. anyways the only show I’ve seen doing more than just "dumb funny guy"for mikey is rottmnt 
Warn me next time, I got allergies - Casey I love you fr 
I wish they kept the birthday cake scene cuz the interaction with donnie, splinter aaaand Mikey is priceless
April and Casey apartment tho oh my 
Leo didnt even tell April or Casey that he came back????? bro??
THE DRAMAAAAAA with Raph and Leo omg seriously its like me and my sister but 10 times worse lmao
I love the background music is like… so early 2000s teens movie fhnsjdinaouji I know its an early 2000s teen movie but the music they be listening in the radio IS like.. something you would listen to in “she's the man” soundtrack and it makes it more realistic to the era it was made u feel 
*Makes passive aggressive comment about Raph*” “ok Leo whatever you say no one was talking about him” it goes b u s t e d you are busted
ABSOLUTELY LOVE when the movie starts playing badass music with radio police talking in the background and raph turns to the camera like its the office and simply says “they are playing my song”
Raph being done that Leo first idea when meeting the night watcher was to give him a lecture LMAO
I hate that Leo won the fight but the “good night dark prince” took me ujnnaojnjkl shut up Leonardo oh my god u r annoying *tucks hair*
*un-tucks hair* Bro I SWEAR I hate when Leo on any tmnt say they are better than Raph SHUT UP OH MY GOD
“Dont do this raph” “im done taking orders” PRESIDENTIAL ALERT THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING 10 bucks on Raph 
MY MAN BROKE THE GODDAMN KATANAS YEEEEES RAPHAEEEEEL
*raphs eyes soften after winning* and it was in this moment, he knew he fucked up
*runs away crying after fucking up an argument due angry issues*
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Shut up Master Splinter speech to Raph made me emotional 
THE AMOUNT OF FOOT SOLDIERS THEY ARE FIGHTING ON THE PATIO THING 
April and Karai fighting (2 seconds) more culturally significant than the whole renaissance
Mikey and Casey having a special high five and APRIL PINCHING HIS ASS AAAAAAAAAAAA
“I presume this is the vortex for another dimension””cool. I want one” relatable 
Karai helping them - once again im in one knee
Leo did NOT say come to daddy oh my god that’s actually embarrassing
April driving poorly while arguing with Casey and karai + foot soldier in the back barely moving like its their emo children being forced into a family road trip gives me so much joy 
aaaaaand the movie is over! honestly there were some parts i didnt see it coming and udsjnounsoa like the little things they got away with it while being a children movie is surprising, sucks they couldnt make the other 3 movies :(
if you read all of this, first of all thank you and this for you:
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starpros-sunshine · 11 months
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OK FOLLOWING UP ON THE BARD THING i think eichi definitely invited wataru to perform at a noble party before. because they'd usually have musicians and so? so ok picture this. it's eichi's birthday so his parents want him to hold a ball and he usually thinks those are annoying but then he gets an idea. make it a masquerade (for the drama). invite wataru as both a performer And his partner for the ball. he's an actor! and everyone is of course impressed by wataru's performance but they're even more impressed because the always polite but unreachable tenshouin heir is expertly dancing with a masked stranger (i love the fact that eichi's specialty in his profile is ballroom dancing). and then they're annoying and overdramatic in public together but no one can figure out Who That Is
and also i know you said that shu was a tailor but i think it would be funny if he also were a noble (his family is also of high standing in canon i think) so he can be there to judge eichi. harshly. i havent figures out yet how to make him besties w wataru but ! it can work
!!!!
This got soooo long again so this is once more put under read more I am so sorry
The idea with the Masquerade comes up while Eichi complains to Wataru about his parents pretty much forcing him to throw a ball for his upcoming birthday (they already planned the whole thing and didn't reallly give him a choice in the matter) and how much of a hassle he thinks that is because of all the superficial politeness between people that everyone knows are gossipping about each other behind each others backs and how sick he is of the pretending to be well acquainted with these people he's talked to maybe once or twice and all the ladies that wish to dance with him and that want to suck up to him because of his families wealth and how really this is all just one big farce to "save face". So Wataru suggests "why not make it a masquerade ball" to spice things up a little bit maybe, take some of the stiffness out of it. And Eichi says he wants to invite Wataru because what's a public event without proper entertainment? Wataru agrees of course and they come up with all of these overly grandiose ideas and scenarios (most of them are utterly absurd. One they genuinely consider involves Wataru pretending to kidnap Eichi and causing a scandal (Eichi woud miraculously reappear the next day and they'd gaslight everyone into thinking that never even happened and all the people are just imagining things)).
Wataru mentions that he'll be gone for an evening to play at the noble's ball to the elderly inn-keeper couple over dinner and they make a really big fuss about it and tell him to dress nicely and to watch his manners because "Remember, you can't just drop from the ceiling with those high society people like we let you do it here they're very sensitive about manners you have to make sure to watch your manners!" and for a minute he wonders how it got to the point that his landlords started to treat him like they personally picked him up from the street when he was a child.
I like to think he met Shu when he was out on the street doing a little street performance to earn some extra money for himself and Shu, the way that he is, came by, looked him up and down, and then started a conversation with him about music as an art form and that somehow turned into a philosophical discussion and at the end of that they each went their own ways with the knowledge that there was a new friendship formed that day.
And maybe he's the one that sews Watarus clothes for the ball because if you spent most of your life as a traveling bard living hand to mouth from your music you won't really have the money for fancy clothes (Eichi still insists on paying for Wataru here because he wouldn't need to spend so much money on fancy ballgowns if it wasn't for him in the first place and also he just wants to treat Wataru to something nice and sees this as his chance seeing as Wataru declines most gift offers me made before). Wataru tells him about the entire thing and Shu scoffs because dislikes Eichi (still need to come up with a way to explain that disdain but I will come up with something trust me!) but his parents force him to be there too so "he might as well" (it's obvious he still puts in a lot of care "because of his pride as an artists" (because Wataru is his friend and he wants him to have something nice)).
Shu only has to be there because his family guilt trips him into going and he doesn't see the point in opening that can of worms again ("We already let you pursue your foolish dream of sewing clothes like a commoner this is the least you could do for your family.")
And then at the actual event he's in some secluded corner together with some other people who only attended as a mere formality because they also do not like the Tenshouin family but they have to be there because they're important and aristocrat politics are weird that way I suppose.
Meanwhile Wataru does his usual thing and charms everyone with his beautiful beautiful voice and his elegance and charm and oh he is so agreeable as a performer. Eichi has to handle the usual "pleasantries" (nothing pleasant about those tries) and he exchanges the one or the other suffering glance with Yuzuru when nobody pays attention that just screams "God when will it end". Yuzuru shoots him back a look that conveys the exact emotion of "my condolences" and then he goes on to look for Tori who's 1.53m figure has disappeared in the group of people and when he finds him he's talking to a gentleman that's about a head taller than him and the mask obscures his face but judging by the hair and the slight "animosity" between them he's talking to Tsukasa, so Yuzuru decides he's in good hands and leaves to do his own thing. (do they know they're talking to each other? Who knows! But they'd probably manage to start bickering either way.)
And eventually it gets to the actual Ball bit of the Birthday Ball Event where they actually dance (there's an actual orchestra there now and they play very lovely music). And almost everyone asks to dance with Eichi at least once. Eichi does not want to waste his time and energy on these people who are just interested in him for his money so he always makes up something about being preoccupied or a little tired or something that gives them no other choice but to back off. Suddenly Wataru appears behind him and does a little "boo!" and Eichi didn't expect that so he startles and almost drops his glass and tells Wataru not to do that anymore at public eventshas while Wataru has to stiffle a laugh because he thinks Eichi is cute when he pretends to try to be firm with him. After he's done with his "scolding" (you can barely call it that. he was very soft on Wataru.) Wataru asks him for a dance this time and he's very chivalrous about it - he goes all out really - he kisses his hand and offers him a rose while he does a little bow and asks if he "may have this dance with the lovely star of the evening" (and oh Eichi wants to kiss him so bad right then and there but in a room full of people that are worse than a committee of vultures that is very much not an option). Of course he agrees and they move to the dance floor and suddenly a Lot of eyes are on them because Eichi Tenshouin, whom a good chunk of pursuers have already given up on - because let us be real. It will never happen. The man hasn't shown interest in anyone at any moment in time and lives together with the Himemiya heir and his butler as far removed from the rest of the aristocracy as one would be able to - is waltzing with this masked stranger and it becomes very obvious very quickly that Eichis constant declining of dance offers was not for a lack of expertise because those two look breathtaking together.
Eichi actually dips Wataru once and some people wish they had hired an artist to paint the scene (because I'm a sap and wataei is beautiful I don't care I'm being self indulgent here)). And they talk but nobody can understand what because of the loud music and they curse the orchestra - which is still playing very lovely music (it's heavenly really) - for it.
After their dance is over Eichi goes back to declining every dance offer he gets with the excuse he's exhausted and needs to rest a little before he can dance again (the "I don't wish to dance with you" is implied and in the room but most people chose to ignore it to spare their ego and decide to take him at face value) and Wataru disappears to somewhere, nobody really knows where but somehow he's nowhere to be found. Until he sneaks up to Eichi a second time and does the whole "Boo!" thing again and Eichi almost drops his glass yet another time and as he turns around to "scold" Wataru again Wataru shushes him and takes Eichis, who is more confusedd than anything by now, hand and sneaks out of the ballroom with him.
Eichi asks where they are going and Wataru doesn't answer he just keeps walking and Eichi decides to just trust the process and suddenly they're on the Balcony again, not a cloud in the sky and the only sounds to be heard are the muffled instrumentals from the orchestra that started playing their next piece. The only lightsource being the moonlight reflected by the new years snow. And Wataru turns around, he's not wearing a mask anymore, and he does his little bow and kisses Eichis hand, hands him a rose he had appear from nowhere - a white one this time - and does his entire "May I have this dance with the lovely star of the evening" spiel again. It's the same routine really but it's different somehow. More intense. Because he says it with more sincerity than he did when they were around more people. And Eichi doesn't even have to reply before he finds himself whisked into this waltz yet again, somehow in the leading position. And then they dance and they dance and it's just the two of them, the stars as their only witnesses. And as the orchestra finishes their piece and the music fades out Eichi dips Wataru again and they kiss and it is so sappy and they are so so so so sappy.
They stay out on the balcony a little while longer but they retreat back inside rather timely seeing as it is still january and the night and as the following consequence of those two circumstances actually pretty cold and they'd both rather Eichi not get sick (he already got Watarus coat but then they'd also both like it very much if Wataru also didn't get sick either so they migrate back into the empty, dimly lit hallways of the mansion rather quickly)
(meanwhile at the actual ball people have noticed Eichi missing and started to ask questions, poor Yuzuru has to repeatedly tell people Eichi probably retreated into his quarters already, seeing as it is rather late and he was rather tired "Please excuse the young master for his failing in notifiying the other guests, he told me he didn't wish to interrupt the nice atmosphere and preferred to leave unnoticed".)
After the festivities died down Yuzuru and Tori go to check up on Eichis room because he's been gone without any notice and it would probably be useful to know if their kind-of-roommate just went away to fool around with that strange bard man they've been seeing sneaking around their mansion from time to time that Eichi seems to be oddly fond of or if the should actually be worried about his well-being. After they knock and get no reply Yuzuru just opens the door and he and Tori are both greeted with the view of Eichi asleep in his bed and next to him the also seemingly fast asleep figure of Wataru who's braid got considerably more lose during the course of the evening and who's also seemingly wearing some of Eichis sleepwear.
They both decide they have seen enough they do neither need nor wish to see more. Yuzuru, who has been in this situation before doesn't even have it in him anymore to react in a specific way. He just lets out this big sigh because he doesn't get paid enough for all of this as he directs Tori out of the room. Tori who has not been in this situation before has a Lot of questions now because he doesn't know this man but he's apparently closer to Eichi than most other people and he doesn't know how to feel about that but happy is probably not it.
(The following day Eichi has to listen to a (rightfully) disgruntled Yuzurus passive-agressive-yet-somehow-still-very-polite-sounding-Yuzuru-complaints about him just disappearing like that and leaving it to Yuzuru to take care of his mess (Eichi promises him to make up for it and that if Yuzuru has any favour to ask he's very welcome to come to Eichi about it). Tori really wants to ask about the strange man Eichi was so involved with but between not really getting a word in while Eichi and Yuzuru are talking and not really knowing how to take the exceedigly good mood Eichi is in (he's had "A very nice evening". With utmost certainty it was for reasons other than him actually enjoying the mingling witht the high society at social function he was obligated to host, Tori guesses), he kind of clinks out here and decides to simply take matters into his own hands when he gets the chance.)
#never let me write anything about them ever again#this got so long again I really just wrote my heart out huh#can you believe I actually researched flower language for this#in the middle I remembered that January is actually really cold at night so maybe I should switch up my approach a little#hm. did that work out? I have no idea#I kind of blacked out somewhere in the middle#Hiyori could've been in this idk he was there too somewhere with Jun or something#Eden attended the event but they're unimportant right now#can you tell I love fairytales by the way I feel like that got a little obvious throughout this entire AU#oh I should make a tag for this I'm actually rather fond of my embarrassing cringefail wataei au rambles#Btw when Wataru comes back home he's also in a very good mood and the elderly inn-keeper couple tease him about it#I've gotten very soft about that little thing that started as a side bit initially#those are his parents now they looked at this guy that has been occupiying this one room for a Long while#and that pays his rent by doing shows for the guests or helping in the kitchen or generally just helping around#some things are just easier when you're young and energetic#and they looked at him and his birds and went ''You're a little strange and off putting but you're part of the family now''#this is way less profound than the first one it's suuuper self indulgent and a little lame but I like indulging from time to time#head in hands i really like wataei#wataei#OH! wait there's symbolism in the dance scene (the second one)#the rest is just me being silly#yumefan🎼🌠#Wataru could wear Eichis clothes no problem I think thats so neat#because they're the same height and it's been said Wataru can pass perfectly for a woman so I assume he has more of a slim frame#chances are Eichis clothes sit loser on him than on Eichi i think that's a little funny#the possibility is there is all I'm saying#<- tag until i figure something out that sounds nicer#Märchen au
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clockworkslick · 7 months
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oh. its 10/16. so short summary before i talk about nothing for a bit too long: a year ago i came up with the idea to actually go through with taking one of my silly ideas and turning it into something that other people could read, so i started drafting the concept of providence, a webcomic i make and thats updating everyday. more talking under the whatever.
so ive always made little stories that i would run through in my head for like two or three months when i had mental downtime, and then move on to some other goofy idea. this is either a totally normal thing or im a freak, honestly i have no frame of reference for how other people act. anyways i was home from college last year and i had this idea for an rpg fantasy story, initially an idea for playing modded minecraft with some friends (god i wish that was a joke), but i started writing shit down in a google doc. i wrote out a handful generic slots for various fantasy classes: witch, dryad, ranger, knight, vampire(not a class but i dont give a fuck), blacksmith, etc. and then i named some of them. i finished naming and writing out plot nonsense in november and changed the name of the comic from "Drive-By" to "Liberty" to "Providence."
honestly i think that was the easy part because its totally non-commital. unfortunately after that i had to actually start making the pages. the original plan was to finish act one before may, which was an optimistic goal to say the least, but also maybe if i didnt have to do anything else it would have been totally possible. or if i was just faster in general. anyways i started drawing everything at the end of december and then didnt stop for 6 months. actually thats a lie, i started drawing pages and havent stopped since then, but what i meant is that i started uploading the comic in may. i had a backlog of about 75 pages and the art change just in that time was nuts. comparing act 2 art to act 1 is more nuts but im not about to redraw the 170 pages of a1 just so that its APPEALING and PALLETEABLE. i learned way more about web design from doing this comic than from my actual web design class. like insanely more. you have no idea how little that class helped me with anything aside from making friends through mutual hatred of being poorly taught.
sixo de mayo (may 6th) came and i started doing this thing for real, and its been so surreal having people actually talk to me about these guys that have been in my head for months. my sister recently asked if deacon was my self-insert, which is sort of true but only in the sense that we both have social issues and like to be dumb on sort-of-purpose, and then she told me that her favorite character was reagan. theres not really any deep meaning behind her telling me or that reagan is my favorite too, but its just so surreal to me that people can have a favorite, or any opinion, on these characters i obsess over.
alright i think im done for now, i just wanted to talk about the comic on its sort of birthday, and also the day that the gang got pulled into the story. i mentioned that vaguely in the story once already, but im cool with being more direct about it. ill probably go on another rant again about this sometime, maybe on sixo de mayo, but probably sooner because im obsessive and like to type. happy birthday comic, heres to a million more. or however many years it takes to make a 5 act story at a rate of like 200 pages in 10 months. hopefully that number will go up.
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corabbit · 3 years
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:)
A Tiny Burger
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CW: SAFE VORE
Notes: I really didn’t intend for this to be so long but it just kept going. Have some beeduo angsty noms for a treat, I hope y’all like it!
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“Quackity have you seen Tubbo?”
Immediately, the shorter man’s head shot up. His hands that had previously been tinkering with a few stray wires on a slot machine came to halt. His one working eye flashed with fear and worry before settling to a more neutral disposition.
Quackity’s distrust was just another warning. Ranboo knew he wasn’t supposed to be here.
Wilbur would kill him if he knew he had visited Las Nevadas without permission, but he couldn’t shake the worry that had been building up in him for days.
He hadn’t seen Tubbo for a whole week.
He knew they had been having their issues, but at the end of the day they always went back home together. Even though they worked on opposite sides they were still family…or at least Ranboo had thought so.
“No he hasn’t clocked in yet,” Quackity glared, clapping his hands together to get rid of the thin layer of black dust “What’s it to you?”
“Oh… nothing,” he sighed, his tail curling anxiously around his leg, “Just hadnt seen him around lately.”
For a split second Quackity eyes studied him suspiciously, searching for any mistruths. Ranboo could practically feel his skin crawl under the man’s gaze.
It wasn’t a lie though. At least not entirely.
He was looking for Tubbo. It had been almost a whole week of him being missing. And no matter how hard Ranboo tried he couldn’t remember what might’ve happened. No fight or conversation came to mind when he thought for where Tubbo might have gone.
It was like his husband had just vanished.
“Well,” Quackity cleared his throat, “You should probably leave my country yeah? I shouldn’t even be letting you here in the first place.”
Ranboo nodded sheepishly, hyper-aware of the shining axe strapped to the duck-hybrids back. Memories of sitting on the cookie store’s walls and the conversation about his planned execution flashed through his head.
“Yeah, no worries. I’ll be on my way,” Ranboo placated, “Um- just let me know if you see him okay. Please.”
Quackity stared at him again before letting his head fall to his chest with a scoff. The tips of his wings twitched in amusement before he turned back to his work.
“Say hi to Wilbur for me yeah.”
Ranboo nodded quickly before almost tripping on his own feet. The nervousness flooding his whole body made him feel like he was vibrating.
He had no idea where else to look for his husband.
He’d asked almost everyone, and no one had seen any signs of the tiny. Not even Tommy had seen him to Ranboo’s dismay. He knew he was probably fine, if anything they probably got into an argument he forgot about. Maybe he said something bad enough to make Tubbo finally leave him.
The thought made him cringe, but it was better than the other alternatives. He didn’t even want to consider if Tubbo had been injured. The tiny was already too careless especially with only one life left.
Ranboo’s thought finally stopped spinning once the burger van came into view. It stood proudly along the tree line bordering Las Nevadas, and smoke from the grills puckered out from the windows like steam. Even from so far he could smell the savoury scent of the burgers.
“Ranboo!” a loud voice called out, “What are you doing man?”
Immediately the enderman’s head snapped towards the sound of the voice, catching on the brown mop of hair peaking out of one of the van’s windows. The wind blew it across his face but even so he would know the man anywhere.
“Hey Wilbur,” he sighed as he jogged over to the van, “Sorry I’m late.”
“No fucking shit,” Wilbur glared, the cigarette between his fingers pointing straight at the enderman, “Where’ve you been. We’ve got a fucking business to run if you haven’t forgotten.”
Ranboo stuttered to find a response as he pulled himself through the van’s doorway. It was fairly clean even though he hadn’t been in in a few days much to his surprise; Wilbur was never one for cleaning.
“I- no no I didn’t,” Ranboo bent down to stand next to the human; the roof just barely scratched the top of his horns, “Just Uh, looking for something.”
Wilbur tilted his head in curiosity, “What kinda thing?”
“Uh well, not a thing per say,” he scrambled, “Just Uh…I don’t know, probably stupid, but have you seen Tubbo at all recently?”
At that Wilbur’s hands froze; his spatula still laying underneath a patty that needed to be flipped. And even though it was a simple question Ranboo couldn’t help but feel like he’d done something wrong. It was almost like he could see the discomfort emanating from the older man.
“No,” Wilbur frowned, “Havent seen him in a while…Did something happen?”
Ranboo’s fingers tapped against one of the counters nervously, “No, well maybe. Its like he just vanished.”
Wilbur’s hand brushed back through his hair as he put down his spatula on the counter. With his stern face Ranboo could clearly see the hints of Tommy’s expressions. It was easy to forget the two were brothers sometimes.
“Well, when was the last time you saw him?” Wilbur shrugged.
“I don’t know like…a week ago? Maybe more?” Ranboo’s eyes squinted in frustration, “The last time I remember was when you invited him.”
Wilbur froze and turned to Ranboo with a quirked lip, “That was the last time?”
“Yeah, why?” Ranboo frowned, “Whats wrong?”
“Oh nothing,” Wilbur hesitated, his attention flitting back towards the burgers on the grill, “Just thought you’d see him before that.”
Ranboo frowned and stepped closer to the shorter man.
“What do you mean by that?” he scowled.
“Huh?” Wilbur shrugged nonchalantly, “Just that I think that’s weird. You’re close and all.”
Wilbur turned back to the burgers but before he could flip them Ranboo’s hand shot out to grab his coat sleeve.
“Why’s it weird?” Ranboo growled, finally allowing himself to reach his whole height.
Even though he was so much younger he could tell it made Wilbur uncomfortable. As much as the revolutionary pretended he was above everyone he was scared. Ranboo knew how scared he was.
The man had seen death and had no wishes to go back.
“Well,” Wilbur shrugged with a familiar air of fake confidence, “I just played a little prank. Just kinda thought you’d have figured it out already.”
The thudding of Ranboo’s chest felt so loud he was sure Wilbur could hear it. And with every breath the overwhelming feeling that something was wrong made him dizzy.
“Will, what did you do?”
Wilbur laughed nervously, tilting his head to the side. His hands immediately sought out the comfort of his pockets.
“Well, just wanted to study a bit of your enderman biology yaknow?” Wilbur said nonchalantly, “Thought the idea of a second stomach was cool, wanted to see if you had one too.”
The moment the words left the older man’s lips Ranboo felt sickness swirl up in his chest. He tried to hide it by standing up taller, but he was sure Wilbur had already seen the disgust on his face.
“What do you mean?” Ranboo’s eyes narrowed.
Wilbur shrugged again, before a sick grin twisted his face, “Wanted to see if you could keep something alive in there. And Tubbo did say he wanted me to ‘make him a burger’.”
Ranboo was sure he must have been dreaming. It had to be a nightmare or some joke. His brain couldn’t even process the information- every thought stopping before they could reach their dreaded conclusion.
“You,” Ranboo stuttered, “You what?”
“You heard me Ranboo,” Wilbur waved his hand lazily, “You’re not stupid are you?”
The harsh words felt like a slap to his face, and all of a sudden the meaning of it crashed down on him like a wave. He almost wished it was so he wouldn’t have to think about what Wilbur- no, what he had done.
He barely processed as he ran out of the van; Wilbur’s laughter echoed in his eardrums. His feet dug into the muddy ground, still wet from the morning rain, but he just kept running. Even as the wet dirt burned into his skin.
It was only when the bubbling sounds of water hit his ears that his legs slowed.
He had no idea where he was.
He couldnt see the van anymore, or any landmark. There were just endless trees and a lazy blue stream racing through the woods.
Ranboo wheezed out an inhuman sound as his legs collapsed near the riverbank. Everything felt like it was too much. Part of him wanted to throw himself into the river so his enderwalk state could take over. At least then he wouldn’t have to think about what he’d done.
As his eyes stared daggers into the water all he could focus on was the small weight in his stomach that had become more and more obvious.
How had he not noticed?
“Tubbo I’m sorry,” he whispered painfully.
Carefully he pushed his palm against his stomach until he could just barely feel something solid behind his skin. Cursing himself under his breath he focused all his attention on the small boy tucked away in his gut.
He’d been there for too long
He’d swallowed Tubbo only once before, and it had been a mistake while he was enderwalking. He’d apologized profusely, but still Tubbo avoided his touch for almost a week. The enderman couldn’t even walk into their shared room without the tiny’s head shooting up in fear.
It was safe of course, like Wilbur had mentioned he did have a second stomach, but it didn’t help ease the fear that Tubbo had.
The idea that he had kept him there for almost a week made him want to curl up and disappear.
“Hey I’m going to get you out,” he whimpered, hoping for any response, “I’m so sorry.”
He tried to calm his breaths before focusing on the lump in his stomach. The stillness of it made fear curl up in his throat, but he had to get him out. He could worry about that later.
He coughed a couple times before he felt the weight rise to his throat. His throat tightened around it, and within seconds Tubbo’s tiny figure fell out onto his palm.
“Tubbo oh god,” he panicked, “God I’m so sorry please be okay.”
But the tiny didn’t move. He laid still in his hand almost like a doll, and he looked far too pale for Ranboo’s liking. His husband had never felt so small in his hands.
“Please Tubbo,” he frowned, carefully pressing ear against the tiny’s chest.
For a few terrible moments he couldn’t hear anything before a weak breath escaped the boy.
His instincts chirped in relief as he focused in on the tiny’s breathing. He still didn’t move, but he could slowly feel his husband’s body warm up under his touch.
Tubbo was still alive.
And even if he would probably hate him, Ranboo could live with that. As long as Tubbo was safe, he would find a way to move on.
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dr3amofagame · 3 years
Note
Dream tried to stop Wil from creating L'Manburg, Phil tried to stop him from blowing it up, BOTH value people over items and builds, Phil has said that they're replaceable but people aren't, Dream traded spirit for his best friends fishes (we kno he's not someone to talk abt feelings:[) BOTH were kind and selfless but used by almost if not everyone, BOTH were ready to be THE VILLAINS if it meant everyone else could live better after. ONE of them always had someone there, ONE didn't. Intentional?
aaaa sorry for the really inconsistent posts ,, im gonna try to post a little more in the next few days. i have a few things written up, so look out for them? maybe? for now, have this *gestures vaguely* thing ,, it’s kinda a mess but *shrug*
phil is such a fun character, anon, especially for all the reasons that you mentioned in the ask!! he’s a really fun character with a lot of complexities that go (sadly) overlooked by a large portion of the fandom, but he’s super cool even tho i havent analyzed him too much. hope you enjoy (and i hope my interpretation of c!phil isnt too ooc lmao) 
tw: mentioned blood, injury, implied torture/abuse, starvation, trauma, mentioned death, prison arc/pandora’s vault
When Techno first brings Dream back from the prison, Phil doesn’t quite know what to think.
“I don’t trust him either,” Techno assures him, but there’s a flickering anger in the backs of his eyes, one that had emerged ever since he came back from the prison with the other man in his arms, and Phil knows his friend well enough to know that the words are empty in the face of the piglin hybrid’s particular brand of to-the-death loyalty. He shakes his head in reply, refusing to voice his thoughts for Techno’s sake, at least, but the look that the other slants at him suggests that he’s caught onto them all the same.
At first, the work is thankfully mindless; even if Phil has reservations on the man that Techno has more or less dumped into his house, he would hardly wish the clear suffering he’s been through on anyone. The first few days pass in a flurry of brewing potions, wrapping and rewrapping dressings, stitching up cuts and setting broken bones straight. The damage is extensive; Phil has to take more than a few breaks to just leave the house and breathe - he’s far from a stranger to blood and carnage, had received the title of ‘Angel of Death’ for a reason, but even he had never been particularly familiar with this form of cruelty. Torture was a level of violence that extended beyond what even he was willing to bestow - his hands may have caused many deaths, and the weight of each one would continue to haunt him for the rest of his life, but even those had the mercy of being a quick end. The wounds and scars that ripple over Dream’s skin, thin and stretched tightly over his bones with little muscle and fat left to cushion them, speak of horrors that were anything but merciful.
“I didn’t know they were capable of all of this,” Techno says, once, as they huddle of Dream, wringing towels in cold water to wipe his feverish skin. Techno’s hand reaches for the ribboning gold-filled scars that remain from the execution - carefully, Phil raises his hand to let his fingertips brush over them as well. “I mean, I knew he was dangerous and all, but-”
“I know, mate,” Phil looks back at Dream’s face, tight even in unconsciousness, at the darkened, hand-shaped bruises that remain around his throat, at the scar that runs over his left eye, clearly meant to mirror the same one that makes its way down the duck hybrid’s own face. “You said that Quackity and Sam were working together?”
“Yeah,” Techno’s expression darkens, eyes focused somewhere on the wall, seemingly very far away. He said that nothing happened to him in the prison, and he seemed relatively unharmed when Phil activated the stasis chamber, but ever since he came back, sometimes he’ll have moments, and Phil can’t help but - wonder. “Quackity does the dirty work, Sam gives him the way in and out, probably also the tools to do it. It’s-” he huffs a short, self-recriminating laugh. “It’s bad, Phil.”
“Mate-”
Techno shoots him a look, and Phil cringes, knowing already that he’d used the wrong tone. Even with the execution, Techno had been adamant to hide all traces of his own terror and fear away from him, masking it all with fury for Phil’s own sake. He knows, just from the way his old friend looks at the ribboning scars that remain sometimes, that he is far from as over the whole ordeal as he acts, but Techno never wants to talk and Phil never knows the right time to ask and they smooth it all behind plans and explosions and hope that the TNT can blow apart the trauma, too. He’s got a sneaking suspicion that the same thing is going to happen, here.
“As soon as we can,” Techno starts again, pointedly shifting his eyes away from Phil’s face, “we’re calling a Syndicate meeting to figure out what we’re going to do about the prison. Like- come on, man, you couldn’t make a more transparent abuse of institutional power if you tried, really-” he looks over, uncharacteristic uncertainty warring over his features. “If you think that’s good, I mean-“
“Of course, mate.” Phil’s voice softens. “Whenever you’re ready.”
‘Whenever he’s ready,’ as it turns out, is easier said than done, becoming even more evident when their charge wakes up from his days long spell of unconsciousness. The worst of his injuries have, under their careful care and the benefit of many potions, healed enough to no longer directly threaten his life, but the vast majority have quite some time to go before being healed completely. Being as the goal was torture and not death, most of his injuries weren’t made to be life-threatening, but rather to cause as much pain as possible - from the grimace that twists Dream’s face when he struggles to force himself awake, they’re doing their jobs.
“Hey, mate, slow down,” Phil murmurs, pressing the man down by his shoulder when Dream weakly tries to push himself up and off the bed, and his struggling only lasts for a few more minutes before he gives up and slumps against his pillow, eyes cracking open and seeming surprisingly lucid.
“Where-“ his voice is wrecked, and Phil reaches for the glass of water at the bedside as Dream coughs. “Where am I?”
“You’re at Techno’s house,” Dream’s eyes widen and then slip closed as he processes the information, a wrinkle forming between his eyebrows as they knit together. “We broke you out, after Techno escaped with a stasis chamber with your book. Do you remember?”
Dream gnaws on his bottom lip. “Um- yeah. I think.” His head turns as his eyes crack open again- “Techno-“
“He’s out, right now. He’ll be back in a bit.”
“Oh.” Dream falls back into the bed, strength seemingly sapped from the short conversation. His breathing stutters, then steadies. “Okay.”
Recovery is slow. Phil doesn’t actually find himself seeing the man very often; now that he doesn’t need around-the-clock care anymore, he’s moved back into his own house, letting Techno do most of the work when it comes to rehabilitating the escaped convict crashing at his house. As he begins to spend more of his time awake and aware, he brings a whole slew of new problems; Phil catches him screaming one day, blurting harsh, angry words as Techno reads, unbothered from the other side of the room, and he stops in his tracks standing awkwardly in the doorway.
“Um-“ he winces when Dream curses, smashes something against the floor, and then curls into himself at the sound. Techno doesn’t even flinch. “Am I interrupting something?”
Dream stomps away, face flushed, arms wrapped around himself. Techno raises an eyebrow.
“You lookin’ for something, Phil?” he asks, and the unpleasant knot in Phil’s chest refuses to unwind.
The episodes, unfortunately, don’t seem to get much better. Though he’s rarely outright violent, Dream looks constantly murderous, usually muttering underneath his breath about something or another while he stalks the grounds of Techno’s house. It’s not too long before Techno sends him out to work around the house instead of just moping within the cottage, which also means that Phil sees him a lot more - tending to a small farm behind the house, feeding the dogs, hacking away at mobs, and usually complaining the entire time. It’s unnerving, even as injured and unarmored as the man is, to see him walking around like this; despite his rather pathetic appearance, swamped in sweaters that dwarf him thoroughly and thin enough to look like the slightest breeze will knock him over, his eyes are flinty and intelligent and bubble with promises of revenge.
“FUCK!” Phil turns to see him slamming a shovel into the snow, stomping away into the woods, and his hands tighten around his cup of tea. Next to him, Techno shrugs.
“Nerd’s got a few issues,” he drawls, and Phil laughs shortly.
“That seems like an understatement.”
“He’ll ease up in time,” Techno sounds surprisingly confident, completely content despite the muffled curses that come from the woods next to them. He’s probably used to it, with Chat and all, but Phil can’t quite seem to find the same calm.
“I just don’t know, mate,” Phil shakes his head. “You sure having him around is the best idea? He doesn’t seem...stable.”
Techno looks up at him over the rim of his cup of coffee. His head tilts, considering, but there’s a small smile on his face that tells Phil that Techno, inexplicably, doesn’t share the same sentiments. There was always a part of him that was, for the lack of a better word, softer than the rest of the server for his self-proclaimed rival, a sort of understanding that Phil could hardly hope (nor would really want to) understand.
“Don’t worry, Phil, if he tries anything I can always just tie him up in the attic or something,” Phil huffs a small laugh, amused, and nods to concede the point. “And- well, call it intuition. You could really try talkin’ to him, you know. He reminds me of you, sometimes.”
The words stick in his head despite his best efforts, rattling in his skull when he tries to sleep, lingering when he catches glimpses of the green-clothed man stalking around their properties. He can’t imagine what would’ve prompted his old friend to make the comparison, can’t think of a single thing (besides their affinity for the color green) that would mark him as similar to the - from what he’s heard - deranged menace with a particular penchant for destruction (not that his rants and fits of anger are doing anything to correct that impression). Even so, Techno had sounded so sure when he’d made the comparison, the words offhand like he’d thought them a million times before, like it was a simple observation that held no more weight than commenting on the color of the sky. Phil watches as Dream lugs a pile of logs behind him, huffing at one of Techno’s dogs that comes to chase and nip at his feet and grumbling loudly before faceplanting into the snow. He just...can’t see it.
Days later, Wilbur comes to visit, a grin on his lips as he dramatically recounts his newest exploit: a nation by Las Nevadas, a supposed safe haven away from the glitter and glory of Quackity’s city; it sounds brilliant, it sounds lovely, and more than anything it sounds stupid, and Phil tells him as such immediately.
“You’re being reckless,” he rants at his son, wings flaring outwards and only barely noticing Dream watching from the corner of his eye, “What are you doing- picking fights with Quackity? Starting another nation- didn’t you see what happened to the first two you made? You’re going to get yourself killed, Wil!”
“Well, I’ve already seen what’s on the other side of death, and it’s really not that bad-“
“You’re my son!” The words are angrier than Phil would’ve liked, and he knows that he looks ridiculous and overbearing, criticizing the actions of his fully grown son, but all he can see is Wilbur’s face, slack with pain and grief, stained with ash and soot as his eyes flutter to half-mast in the midst of the rubble of a country he loved and destroyed and destroyed him in turn. “I can’t lose you again, Wil!”
Wilbur doesn’t quite storm out, but it’s a near thing, leaving with a clipped goodbye and leaving Phil seething on his doorstep. He spends the rest of the night pacing around the house in a sort of mad frenzy, wings stretching and folding over and over. Not for the first time, he longs for the sky, to feel the air through his wings and let the world fall into pinpricks below him; it’s this that leads him to the roof of his house, staring stubbornly at the clouds as the sun sinks down to the horizon.
“Hey.”
Phil startles; there, down below him, is Dream. He rocks back on his heels, seeming awkward, before clambering up the wall (Phil rolls his eyes at the ease with which he scales it, the feeling in his chest almost fond) and settling himself on the shingles at Phil’s side.
“Hey, mate,” Phil shakes his head. The fondness leaves, and the irritation that had risen at Wilbur’s words, earlier, comes back full-force. “Sorry- Wil came to visit, we talked. I just needed some time to think.”
Dream hums in acknowledgement, and they fall into a comfortable silence, watching as the sun dipping down past the mountains in the distance.
“You know,” Dream starts, sudden, “I told him the same thing.” He looks up at Phil, eyes faraway with old memories. “Wilbur, I mean. When he made L’manburg- I told him he was being reckless.” He shrugs. “I guess he never listened.”
Phil pauses, Techno’s words ringing in his ears. He reminds me of you, sometimes.
Dream looks surprisingly normal up close - face no longer reddened with fever or pale from blood loss, even the scars fail to really take from the boyishness of his face. He bites his lips, eyes falling away at Phil’s scrutiny, golden blond hair flopping over his forehead, newly trimmed to be something a little closer to his old length, at least in the front, the back pulled into a small ponytail. He’s young, and shockingly awkward, teeth worrying his lip, hands fiddling with each other, shifting his weight from one foot to the other several times a minute. He looks like a kid.
“He never does,” Phil lets himself smile, watches as Dream smiles back, almost like they’re sharing a joke. He wonders how well he really knows the man behind the mask. “Want to come in for some tea?”
Dream smiles wider, and something old and worn in Phils chest, knocked loose ever since he felt his son fall limp in his arms with his own sword shoved between his ribs, falls back into place.
“That would be great,” Dream replies, the words almost hopeful, and they go inside.
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scarecrowmilkfog · 3 years
Text
♡My Prison Pen Pal♡
Helmut Zemo x reader
Word count: 1,802
Warnings: swearing, mentions of prison and crimes and slight angst to do with his family
A/N: its finally here! I havent writen a fic in a long time so hopefully you guys like this! I tried to avoid using idioms and things like that but message me if you need anything explained or reworded as I know most people aren't native English speakers
@sorcerersofnyc
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♡♡♡
His first letter came during the series finale of your favourite show. A rather inconvenient moment, you thought, so it stayed on the welcome mat until you passed through the hall on your way to bed. Picking it up, you figured you'd skim the first few lines then finish it and write a reply before work. Instead, you found yourself writing and rewriting a reply through the night. Somehow this man had managed to enthrall you with only a letter. Maybe it was the way he wrote as if he was some elegant poet whose sonnets would one day be hailed as classics. How he managed to be open and expressive, exuding a welcoming aura, and yet still seeming mysterious. Or perhaps it was simply fated by the stars that Helmut Zemo would capture your heart.
You waited anxiously for his second letter to arrive. After sending the first, you hadn't cared whether you got a response, the whole thing seemed like a bad idea to you. But your mother was insistent that you needed to meet new people and this way you wouldn't need to worry about awkward face to face conversations. Sending the first letter felt like any other chore you do in the day, done with much effort and resignment but forgotten within minutes. But the second? It felt like the most important thing you'd done in a long time. You'd even bought a first class stamp (not that it makes a difference).
You wanted to know more about this intriguing man. No, supervillain. Charged with international terrorism. Jesus christ what the fuck was wrong with you? Were you really falling in love with a supervillain after one letter? But he didn't seem evil to you. He wrote eloquently, somehow his simple and brief description of his day (he'd started reading a new psychology book, you'd have to send him some recommendations) sounded fascinating in his words.
Over time, you started to notice small things about Helmut. The way he crossed his t's, how he signed his name, but mainly that there was a romanticism to his writing. From the way he described his home, his wife, his son to his recipes for Sokovian dishes with small notes and doodles (your favourite was his shepherd's pie recipe where he helpfully noted his mother's assertion that you should always add more than you think you need). It was becoming clear to you that he wasn't the stoic and vengeful baron you expected but rather a soft, lonely and endearingly weird man who you couldn't imagine plotting to destroy the Avengers. Whilst it was his mystery that first captivated you, it was his sweet and sometimes awkward personality that convinced you to keep writing.
It took a while for Helmut to tell you about his family. You had heard on the news back when he first arrested about his motive, so you were interested to hear his perspective on his crimes. But that wasn't what you got. Instead, he told you about when he and his father used to play football when he was young and how they would play a match every time he visited, with Helmut playing against his father and son, who always wanted to play with grandfather. He told you of the songs his wife used to sing, how her voice was always loud and shaky and after years of singing somewhere over the rainbow she would still forget the lyrics and invent her own. He told you how his son was the best pianist he had ever heard. How he could play the greatest rendition of amazing grace and that he had just learnt the theme from swan lake. That he had been excited to practice it on his grandfathers grand piano the day Ultron attacked.
There was something so human about this man. His love for his family, his loss and grief, his plan to avenge his family, it was all so tragic and yet here he was sending you drawings of the flowers from his garden growing up. You wanted to hug him and yet sometimes you felt he wouldn't need it, wouldn't want it. You were wrong.
Helmut Zemo missed his family. He told you so in one of his most recent letters. He missed holding his son, brushing his wife's hair, going for long drives, waking up at 2am to comfort his son, early morning trips to the shops, cleaning up after dinner, helping with homework. Everything he listed seemed so trivial, so meaningless in the grand scheme of life and yet the memories meant so much to him.
You realised then you had never pitied him before. Not that he wasn't deserving of it, just that he didn't seem to need it. But overtime you realised that what Helmut had really needed wasn't revenge or to make a world free from superhumans, it was someone to talk to. Someone to trust. Someone who would understand his pain and not judge it. Perhaps, you thought to yourself, you could be that person.
Fuck.
You couldn't think of how to cope with this. No one you knew had ever mentioned falling in love with a criminal through letters. And as hard as you tried you hadn't been able to find a single romcom with this plot line. You couldn't tell him. You imagined with his seemingly fragile state of mind receiving from basically a stranger professing their love would at best cause him to ghost you. Especially after he confided in you, shared his thoughts and memories.
So instead you continued as normal. You sent him pressed flowers and pictures of your favourite places. Eventually, he asked what looked like, and you spent an hour trying to decide whether you should send a picture of yourself or to just vaguely describe your features. After deciding to send a picture of yourself on holiday a few months before the blip, you found yourself wondering what he'd do with it. Would he throw it away as soon as he got the letter or would he keep it, tuck it away in some book to look at whilst thinking of you?
You also found yourself wondering what he looked like in the real world. You had found pictures of him online, but they didn't feel real. He was never rarely happy. The pictures pre Ultron were clearly taken by paparazzi, so you weren't surprised he rarely looked anything other than annoyed. There were a few though, ones with his wife and son, where he clearly hadn't noticed, and some from when he was much younger and seemed to enjoy the attention. Then were those taken after his arrest.
And so you continued to wonder he looked like. How he looked in the morning, with flowers in his hair or in summer with the sun lighting his face. You wondered what his hair looked like wet, if he ever scrunched his nose in disgust. You wondered what his smile was like.
Over time, you told him more about yourself. The stress of returning home after the blip to no job, no house and your friends 5 years older. Your ex was married with kids and your sister had moved abroad. It was as if you blinked and your whole life had changed. You mentioned how it was your mum who had suggested getting a pen pal, so you could talk to someone new, who was living a different life to you, although she had meant someone in a different country not jail. Since coming back you'd been isolated and stressed with starting a new job, recovering lost information and personal belongings and moving house, so you had thought it might be good to speak to someone who didn't know you, who couldn't judge you. You told Helmut how it had been good, how writing to him had helped you, how he had helped you more than he could ever know.
No, that sounded creepy. How you appreciated his letters.
Too formal. How you hadn't expected to become his friend, but you were glad to be able to say you were.
Helmut was comforting. You knew in your head that your meeting on Friday was nothing to worry about but seeing him say it felt so reassuring. Each one of his letters made you feel relaxed, feel safe. You wanted to make him feel the same. So, as a way to repay his kindness you had told him that no matter what happened, he could always trust you. And it was true. You couldn't imagine a world where you wouldn't do anything for Helmut and although you knew he would never need it, you still wanted him to know you would always care about him, even if no one else did.
Writing to him had become as easy as talking to someone you'd known all your life. You had fallen into an easy routine, you knew when to expect his letters and you knew when you'd send a reply. The routine felt so natural that you even knew what the envelope would look like, always the same off-white with a square edged flap. The address was always the same too. Except on his last letter. Which was strange.
At first, you thought Helmut had been moved to a different prison but after frantically typing the address into Google Maps you realised it was not a prison. Fuck you had no idea what it was, but it wasn't a prison. It also wasn't in Germany.
You sat still, staring at the unopened letter for a few minutes.
You looked up at the door. You thought you heard someone knock. The post had already come and you weren't expecting people. Hell, there wasn't anyone other than your parents who would visit anyway and they would have called first. Now you were sat still, staring at the front door.
"I know you're in there, the lights are on."
It was as if you were a marionette, being moved by some strange force that was slowly pulling you out of your seat and towards the door. You didn't even register that you moved until you felt the door handle on your fingertips. The cold metal caused you to stop, as if broken out of a trance. There was a sudden realisation that if you opened the door your life would never be the same. It was sickening, a mixture of dread and excitement; it reminded you of the moment before a roller coaster drops. You repeated that thought in your head. "Your life would never be the same". Your life hadn't been the same in almost a year. What would be the harm in one more big change. So you did it. You opened the door.
His smile was beautiful.
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lacieabyss · 3 years
Text
dazai and the book theory !!
Ok so im pretty sure most ppl have heard abt this theory. But if u havent its simple.
There are two possibilities of this theory:
1. Dazai is a product of the book ( somewhat like sigma )
2. Dazai himself is the book.
Now I will just give my own thoughts abt why I believe in this theory.
Again most of this is just my assumptions I dont have any hard proof to back this up but I just wanted to talk abt it lmao.
so first thing first why do I believe this theory ??
Lets just look at Dazai for a second and think abt him. He is a character who is written with a mysterious aura. When we first meet him we think he is just a second lead who is goofy and likes to commit suicide. But then we are given the fact that he was a former port mafia member and slowly we get to know more abt him like that. Dazai's so called past right now is completely just about the mafia, any piece of info we know abt him is just related to the mafia. From the light novel 15 we get to know that mori picked up dazai when he was 14, from where ??? it was never stated. Thats the furthers we know of Dazai's past he started to assist Mori in a plan to kill the former port mafia boss in exchange of Mori helping him to die. Thats all after that we know nothing abt how ?? why ?? where ?? did Dazai come to meet Mori. We dont know ! Not Dazai not anyone has ever mentioned anything abt him before he came to know Mori.
Weird ?? dont u think ??
Now lets take a min to think abt other characters, most ppl's past stories have been abt when they were kids and has actually shown a lot of how they came to be who they are like now. But Dazai ??? there is nothing, why is Dazai suicidal ??? we dont know anything abt it. Now some might argue and say he is just like that. But do u really think someone would be so crazy behind suicide just like that with no reason ??? i will admit i could be wrong abt this but still.
In a short it just feels Dazai just seems to appear out of literally no where, its just like he was born one day as a 14 yr old and Mori found him. Thats literally all of Dazai's so called origin till now.
1. Dazai is a product of the book.
THIS !! this theory becomes more believable everyday i think abt it. With all the things i mentioned above, u can kind of see where im going. Dazai being a product of a book is a excellent theory, for starters he just seems to have no past prior to the incidents of 15. Now again maybe Dazai has kept his past so secretive that no one really can find out but thats again a possibility like many others. Now lets try to tie up his suicidal tendencies with this theory. Now lets say u were to be created from a book and you know abt it, wont u feel deep down not like a human ???? Thats what i think is happening with Dazai, he feels his existence is wrong and against the rule of this world cuz he was just made up one day as a 14 years old. His existence to him maybe feels wrong in a way and inhuman. Now usually life is always connected with death. Death is something only a living being can feel. So what if the reason he does all this suicidal things its to feel close to death, so he can feel at least a bit human. And also in dark era Dazai clearly states that he desires death cuz he think keeping oneself near to raw emotions like those will help him find a reason to live.
I might make another post to cover the rest but thats all for today thank you for reading bye !!
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fanficsrusz · 3 years
Text
POWER - Henry Cavill Smut
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Warnings: Smut.
Pairing: Y/n x Henry cavill
Summary: Y/n's plan to seduce Henry backfires but in a wondrous way.
Word Cound: 7.7k
A/N: Its been a while since I've posted anything and I feel a little nervous 😅. However I've missed the thrill of creating a world all of my own. I also apologise for any spelling/grammatical mistakes. I havent edited anything for a long time so yeahhh. 
Please comment/reblog if you enjoyed ❤️
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"You're drunk" 
The accusation, issued through Henry's teeth, was an angered hiss and Henry's reaction was everything that Y/n could have wished for… And more. 
Y/n forced a little hiccup, feeling it bubble its way through her body before it made its escape out of her mouth, and almost laughed at the thin set of lips across from her that stayed in a straight line. 
He looked positively prim - just like he always did. 
"No-" she defended, "-I'm happy". The correction came with a sly smile, her upper body leaning towards him across the bar, her inner amusement increasing as she watched his body stiffen in annoyance.
 Henry was keeping a distance between their bodies, as if he thought her intoxication may be infectious. 
The hold he quickly took to her waist was more of a brace rather than an intention as she swayed forward and then backwards. 
"Don't you want me to be happy, Henry?" 
Y/n pouted, tilting her head back and looking at him with what she hoped would be a sultry invitation. She laughed, a bold, wicked sound that drew a few glances from others in the bar. Henry stared stiffly over her head, swallowing the lump in his throat that had seemed to form as he grew more irritated with the woman's involuntary outbursts. 
 "For God's sake, Y/n, control yourself", he whispered tightly. 
Was he embarrassed by her lack of inhibition? No. It was quite the opposite. He felt… lost. As if he had no idea how to act in the situation he had found himself in. 
It was normal for him, the playboy, to taunt her with his fancy words, to distract her with his sinfully dark looks and honeyed phrases, but turn the tables and he wasn't quite so poised himself and Y/n felt a delicious thrill of power at the knowledge that she had him off balance. 
She deliberately let herself go  limp in his arms, and, when his grip relaxed in relief at the stability her body found, she quickly slipped under his guard, pressing the entirety of her body sinfully against him. 
Her tactics immediately threatened to backfire as Henry's coldly rigid body seemed to be generating an incredible amount of heat and that in itself was enough for her to lose focus of her goal. 
She rested her check against his chest and willed away her trembling response even as she measured his annoyance by the wildly uneven thump of his heart. 
"You'll regret this tomorrow," he told her sternly, his hands tightening painfully on her waist.
"'Why in hell did you drink all that champagne? Do you want to make a total fool of yourself, jeopardise a deal with Dere-?" 
"Rubbish. Derek thought I was as graceful as ever; he told me so," y/n said airily, thinking that it was too late to regret drinking at a business meeting with her boss and other potential clients. 
Y/n moved steadily in his arms to prove it, brushing her breasts against his chest, hoping that the crushed velvet of her dress would hide the multitude of her sins that had seemed to accumulate quickly throughout the night and not to mention the past year that she had worked beside Henry, every single dirty thought she ever had about him portraying itself as nothing more than a red stain upon her cheeks and chest. 
She had never been sinful before, always a dutiful daughter, just as she had later been a faithful business partner to Henry but there was only so much a woman could take before she had to take drastic measures. Now she was neither a daughter nor a business partner. She was Y/n Y/l/n. Herself. A woman before anything else and more specifically a woman with needs. 
"You're the only one who thought I was wrong for declining the partnership" , she drawled mockingly, too caught up in her reckless self-absorption to monitor his surfacing awareness. "Chill out, Henry. If you can't fix it with a snap of your fingers, you might as well lie back and enjoy the open bar…" 
The thud of his heart had settled down to a swift, arrhythmic beat that set up a sympathetic vibration throughout her body from her scalp to the soles of her restless feet.
There was a small pause as he manoeuvred her pliant body away from another couple that wanted to get to the bar. Then he tilted his head to look down at her.
 "Chill out?" Amusement leaked through his iron control as he suppressed the grin he held in tight. " wow- I never thought I'd hear street-slang from that elegant, business-lady mouth of yours…". 
For a second Y/n gulped, thinking she had lost all control of the situation that she had perfectly built up all evening but then Y/n moved dreamily against him, fully immersed in her ideal scenario. 
She linked her arms round his back and arched her neck slightly so that she could see his expression. 
"But I'm not a lady tonight, Henry, I'm a woman," she said huskily.
 "Should I lie back and enjoy that too?" he enquired cynically. 
That conjured up indecent images that for a moment left Y/n shocked, breathless even and if it wasn't for the distant sound of a glass breaking somewhere in the bar then she would have stayed in her trance like manner. 
Her lips parted as she tried to say something sophisticated in response but she couldn't think of a thing and for a moment she feared that she had lost the edge. Y/n bit her lower lip and suddenly he had control over her again, his voice rough with threat, as he gave her a small shake.
"Behave yourself, Y/n. Stop being so fucking provocative. You should go home" 
"I'm not ready to go home yet" she mewled, eyes darting over to the dance floor that served as a pick up ground. 
Henry sighed, his eyes following her gaze
"One dance, that's all you get. Then I'm getting you out of here before you start leaping onto table-tops and doing the can-can!" 
"What a killjoy you're turning out to be, Henry" with fresh fury, she suddenly spun out of his arms and danced freely for a few moments before cutting mischievously in on another couple. Soon Henry was glaring murderously over the shoulder of a blonde woman while Y/n languished in the sweaty grasp of a nervous young man who was very aware of the hovering blue-eyed menace.
 When Henry cut back in a short time later, Y/n was relinquished with ill concealed relief. 
"You're playing with fire, Y/n" , Henry warned, his firm hand taking hold of her again. This time he held her so captively close that she could feel the lines of his suit being imprinted on her velvet dress. 
She had the feeling that if he had been able to shackle both her wrists behind her back without attracting attention he would. He wanted to cage her, tame her, but tonight, surrounded by the security of a crowd, she was determined to be untamable, just to see how far she could push him. 
"Mmmm, I know, and I feel so gloriously toasty and warm," she murmured wickedly, waggling her eyebrows at a passing male. 
Henry swore under his breath and pulled her flirtatious eyes away from any male that passed by capturing her gaze before she could perform some similar impropriety. He quickly brought his own hand to his mouth to mask his aggression in the pretence of courtesy. She had been right about the shackling. 
"You're drunk", he repeated raggedly, more as if he was telling himself than her. She rather liked the hint of desperation that seeped into every word he spoke. It was almost as satisfying as having him grovel at her feet. 
Y/n laughed, a sensuous 'cat-with-the-cream' look of satisfaction on her face as she widened her eyes and purred, "But not incapable, darling…".
She tamed a deliberate misstep as she spoke so that her leg slid caressingly between his thighs as they turned. 
Henry almost stumbled as she lifted her knee, briefly applying the pivoting pressure of her thigh firmly to the juncture of his. Her provocation had an immediate effect and she drew back instantly, finally aware that her teasing had gone too far. But it was too late. Henry had reached the end of his tether. 
"Fine -" he seethed, "-we'll do this the hard way then" 
Five minutes later Y/n  was belted roughly into the passenger-seat of her own car. 
" I'm perfectly fit to drive, Henry" she raged at the man who slid angrily behind the steering wheel before inserting her keys into the ignition. 
"I'm as sober as you are!"
" For your sake, I hope that's a lie, Y/n". 
His voice was nothing but a growl and y/n felt the shiver that started in her groin slowly rise up through her spine. 
"But if it is true then maybe you've done me a favour. If you were teasing me deliberately I don't have to feel guilty for what I'm about to do." his eyes stayed focused on whatever he was staring at, his fists curling tightly around the steering wheel until his knuckles turned pale. 
"Do?" Y/n asked faintly as the car sprang into motion with far more power than she ever managed to coax from under the unimpressive bonnet.
"Did you think I would calmly walk away like an obedient lap-dog when you got tired of your little game ?"
 "I...I... didn't think-" she began to splutter. 
"No? Just instinct, was it? Trap the beast, then rattle his cage until he howls? Wasn't that your goal?" 
"Henry!" 
He hadn't looked at her since they had got in the car, driving with a narrow-eyed concentration, but now he slipped a grim sideways glance at her shocked expression and what he saw there seemed to ease his ferocious tension but the wolfish twitch of his mouth wasn't reassuring
"You did, didn't you? You really thought I'd let you get away with it. You didn't think I'd have the guts to drag you kicking and screaming out of there" 
Y/n swallowed the dry lump in her throat. She had definitely underestimated her victim and definitely forgot to plan this far ahead. 
"'I wasn't kicking and screaming," she protested weakly, avoiding the obvious answers he wanted.
 "Not on the outside maybe. But your innocent act never did cut any ice with me" Henry's eyes glanced over at Y/n
Y/n clenched her fists tightly, until her nails dug into the palm of her hand, but she barely noticed. The only thing she was really aware of, was the sound of her heart throbbing against the cage of her chest. 
It wasn't until she looked up into the rear view mirror, that she noticed she had been biting her lip so much so that they were almost as red as the lipstick that had wiped off hours ago. 
"Scared, Y/n?" Henry jeered softly as she swallowed again, this time audibly. "You should be." he said lowly
"What about your own car?" she began weakly, hoping that practicalities might prevail where argument hadn't. 
"I'll pick it up tomorrow." Y/n went quiet. This fantasy was easier to plot when she didn't have to concentrate on parrying his verbal thrusts and she tried to calm her nervous actions with whatever had made her think that she could best him at his own game. 
She wished she were drunk but all she could do was hope that the drive would cool down that scorched male pride. All she could do momentarily was create another plan. 
When they would finally get back to her apartment building she would placate him, contrive to convince him that it had all been a silly mistake. For all his threatening manner, she knew instinctively that he wouldn't use violence to enforce his threats. He didn't have to... all he had to do to seduce her was to take her in his arms and then she would be at his mercy. But once she had bolted her door on him she would be safe from her own wicked urges. 
He could rage and huff and puff all he liked but he wouldn't be able to get in. The irony was rather quaint. All the security locks that he had insisted she have installed on her doors and windows when he first found out she lived alone in a not so friendly neighbourhood would ensure that her virtue remained unassailable - well for tonight at least. 
Y/n had almost convinced herself that she had already outwitted him when she noticed the unfamiliarity of their route.
"This isn't the way to my home!" 
He ignored her. The moving light thrown by the passing street-lights illuminated his shadowed expression. It was a hard mask of satisfaction.
 "Dammit, Henry, where are you taking me?" 
"I told you. Home." 
"This isn't where I live." 
"I never said I would take you to your home. I simply said 'home'. It's not my fault that you assumed I meant your home." 
Henry turned into a steep, dark, curving driveway that seemed to drop away directly into the deep black glitter of a Lake that Y/n didn't even know existed in the area. 
 Y/n's heart was in her mouth as the car swooped towards the water, but when they reached the lower curve into darkness, security lights suddenly flickered on and she saw the brick paved courtyard clearly for an instant before the car was swallowed by the lower level of the house.
The garage door closed automatically after them, and for a moment after Henry cut the engine, the only sound in the softly lit enclosed space was the faint ringing echo of the metal door. Y/n was irresistibly reminded of the metallic springing of a trap. One that she had baited herself into.
"Welcome home, Y/n." Henry leaned towards her and she flinched, but he was merely flicking open her seatbelt.
She couldn't see him smile but she could hear the amusement in his voice as he continued, "No, not here in the car. I'm not so crude as to take up your generous invitation without due ceremony and at least a few comforts." 
Henry leaned even further, reaching across her to push open her door, this time dragging his arm deliberately against her rapidly rising breasts as he withdrew. 
"Get out. I'd prefer to go inside" he purred dangerously, pointedly placing her car keys out of reach in the inside pocket of his jacket.  
" but If you can't restrain your wild passion and don't mind a little discomfort I'm quite ready and willing to make love to you against the dashboard" 
Y/n was up and out of the car with as much alacrity as her fumbling apprehension would allow. His mocking laugh as he followed suit had her searching for the door, but he was there before her, opening it with a flourish and a small bow.
" After you. " 
All the way up the narrow, spotlight staircase, Y/n was aware of the movement of her hips and legs, the breathless difficulty in her chest and, most of all, the steady, inexorable masculine tread that stalked her. 
The room at the top of the stairs was shrouded in darkness, relieved by vague glimmering white shapes that made her gasp. 
"Afraid of ghosts, too, Y/n? What a timid little thing you're turning out to be…". The murmured words smoked across the small area of vulnerable skin between her shoulder-blades, exposed by the discreet scoop of her gown, whispering across her sensitised nerves. There was a faint click and the room sprang into light. 
The white shapes were sheets, draped over bulky objects. 
Even the floor was covered by a dark green sheet, and the reason was obvious. The walls were stripped and primed, but had not yet had their first coat. 
They were in the kitchen, Y/n guessed from the positioning of the shrouded fittings. Scattered about were cans of paint and rolls of wallpaper, brushes soaking in paint and the odd ladder or two. The only ghosts here were those of the tradesmen. 
Yet,  Y/n's heart continued to flutter with a deliciously disconcerting fear, an excited apprehension.
 Without a word Henry took her by the elbow and ushered her impatiently through several more similarly dust-shrouded rooms with the unswerving instinct of a guided missile, not bothering to turn on any more lights. 
The place seemed huge, and as silent and brooding as the explosively primed man beside her.
 "You-you're redecorating!" Y/n grabbed at the chance to divert him from his relentless intention. Honestly it surprised her that she had known him for so long and yet had never seen his home, he didn't even talk of it much. 
Henry didn't answer and she fell quiet. 
He let her resistance slow him but he didn't let his grip ease. He had already been taken by surprise once too often that night.
"Have you been feeling hunted, Y/n?" Her answer was in her uneasy sidelong look. He smiled secretively. "Now you know how I felt this evening: like the helpless prey to your brazen huntress…" Y/n flushed, her whole body heating at his words. She had been brazen, utterly so, and she had enjoyed it far too obviously to try to deny it now. 
Henry let her dwell on her folly for a moment before he murmured, "The answer to your question is…" his slow smile drew out the suspense for a wickedly long second "...perhaps." 
His eyelids drooped, not quite hiding the predatory gleam that smouldered in the darkness. He was still very, very angry and he wanted her to know it.
  "Certainly it turned out to be very convenient for you…"
 His free hand came up under her other elbow and he stepped around to face her, forcing her backwards and into the realisation that while he had held her enmeshed with his equivocating words he had been slowly backing her to the wall.
"I'm no one's convenience," she spat, determined not to see the effect his calculated menace was having on her already chaotic nervous system.
"You have to admit you qualify in one or two forms of the dictionary meaning, Y/n," he drawled, driven to foment her the way that she had tormented him. "You're certainly suitable for my purposes and needs and you're close by... but no, I don't suppose you could be considered "easy to use"...
The fear that had inhibited her flared into an open temper at his overt mockery. 
"If you think I'll let you-" "-Challenging me, y/n?" he interrupted softly, and watched her hesitate as she realised the certain consequences of goading him from her very vulnerable position.
"Actually," he continued almost kindly, "it's a little late for second thoughts. You've led me this far with your little game. Now it's time to pay the piper…" He dipped his head and to her tingling shock bit her gently on the side of her satiny throat. She reared back, but there was nowhere to go, no escape that didn't involve going through that broad-shouldered, lean-hipped wall of male arrogance!
"led you! You're the one who practically kidnapped me" She was appalled to hear the breathy lightness in her words when she had meant them to be firm. 
"Mmm. Exciting, isn't it?" He bit the other side of her throat. "Just think how thoroughly helpless you are right at this minute. You're in a strange house, while I know every nook and cranny. All the exits are deadlocked. Even if you ran, where would you run to? I'm stronger than you are. bigger, harder, faster. You can't get away, no matter how hard you try. I can do anything I want with you. And there's nothing you can do about it, except…" 
" Except what?" The mouth skimming her throat was having as violent an effect as his taunting words, arousing the deeply buried desires that she had tried to deny. 
" accept what you caused" She felt the curve of his lips against her smooth skin, heard the amusement in the sensuous rumble.
 He was laughing at her. 
He wasn't content with merely seducing her. No, he wanted to humiliate her, too.
Sudden panic struck and with a fierce surge of strength she shoved at his solid chest. To both their surprise, he staggered back, far enough for her to dart away. With a roaring curse he gave chase.
Y/n's heart hammered as she scuttled from the safety of one covered piece of furniture to the next. She froze, listening for the direction of his pursuit, but Henry had also stilled. He was out there somewhere, crouched and aware, listening, just as she was, waiting to pounce. Her skin prickled hotly and she could feel the blood pulsing heavily through her veins. Y/n shivered with a strangely febrile excitement. She peered around what appeared to be a small table and saw a graduation of the blackness - A doorway!, 
Taking a deep breath, she took to a low crouch and ran for it. As she did so she felt a rush of air as close as a blow and a throaty growl. He had only just missed her! She couldn't help letting out a little scream as she abandoned stealth and bolted, darting breathlessly to the darkened room.
Henry was never far behind and at first she was grateful that he didn't switch on the lights, the better to find her, but as his taunting laughter infiltrated the night she realised that he was revelling in the chase...and so was she! 
Her inner certainty that Henry would never physically hurt her, even in genuine rage, gave an added piquancy to the situation. 
She had challenged him in the most clemental way possible and he was responding in a way that was as different and exciting as he was. 
The panic which had precipitated her flight became a delicious terror as the teasing game of hide-and-seek continued. 
Sexual tension flourished in the shrouded silence like a living thing. He was no longer in a hurry to catch her, whispering silky-voiced threats into the night that curled her toes and dampened her palms, describing in sensual detail what was going to happen when he found her.
 It didn't take Y/n very long to break. When Henry suddenly went quiet her imagination ran riot. She pressed herself even more tightly against the reassuring solidarity of what appeared to be a sideboard and quavered, "Henry?". 
There was no answer and she tried hard to sound convincingly calm. 
"Henry, this is ridiculous. Why don't you turn on the light and we'll talk about it sensibly?" Sensible was the last thing she felt but she couldn't stand the waiting no longer. 
Y/n was just close enough to the edge of her self control to try shameless grovelling.
" All right, so I acted foolishly this evening. Now you've got your revenge and now we're even aren't we?" 
Silence 
"okay fine , yes, I admit it!" she cried. "I pretended to be drunk to tease you but…" 
Silence,
"I did it because... because I didn't expect you to respond." And may God not strike her down for that awful lie!
 "I wanted to annoy you, that's all. It was wrong of me. Childish. I'm sorry. I just wanted to give you a taste of your own medicine. You always seem to have this - control over me. I just wanted to get under your skin for once."
Silence 
"Henry? Henry!' Her placatory tone slipped badly. 
" Fuck!, stop it. Henry, this isn't funny anymore!"
A soft chuckle floated out of the darkness. Y/n was too disorientated to guess its direction and she whirled a full circle. 
" I'm not playing your stupid game any more, Henry, so you may as well come out. I won't try and run away again. I promise."
Silence. 
Y/n began to tremble, not from fear but from helpless desire. Dammit, why didn't he come out and finish what she had started already. There was a soft sound to her left, a tiny echoing click that acted like a trigger on her taut nerves, catapulting her automatically to the other wall of the room, where she backed hastily between two tented objects that provided her with a solid sense of security. A false sense, she discovered, when a hand suddenly whipped across her mouth from behind, smothering her scream.
 "So much for your promises, Y/n," came the clipped murmur in her ear. "That was only my cuff-link. You ran straight into my arms."
 The hand across her mouth tightened as she tried to protest, and an arm lashed around her waist, drawing her back against a hard, familiar body. He hadn't lied in his silken whispers. He was just as aroused as she was by their foolish game. 
She stood there for a moment, her head against his shoulder, trembling and breathless. She tried to speak and tasted the sweat of his palm. Instead of dropping his hand he trailed it deliberately across her lips, his fingers curving into her parted mouth, stroking the inner surface of her mouth and fondling her tongue with an intimacy that was far more shocking than any explicit sexual caress.
Her heart thundered in her breast as he softly probed her moistness, scaling the breath from her lungs, as he whispered, "Do you like this, Y/n? Your mouth is like wet satin, wrapping around my fingers. Use your tongue, tell me if you like the taste of me…" The sheer intoxication of his husky plea made her moan and he quickly let his hand drop. 
"Am I hurting you?"
 She couldn't answer and his hand continued to fall, until it settled on the firm roundness of her left breast, his palm cupping her, feeling the pounding tumult within.
" You...frighten me," she managed to say, her taste buds tingling with each word, drowning in the full flavour of him. 
"This isn't fright, Y/n…" His hand tightened and then released, to flatten and move against her in soft rotation, compressing the flesh in a way that made her tremble even more. 
"This is excitement. You wanted to be caught, didn't you? You're as curious about me as I am about you, only you wouldn't let yourself admit it. Tell me now if this is not what you want, Y/n, because from here on in I can't guarantee my control…"
As he issued his rough command his hand moved to explore her other breast. The hand around her waist strayed, fingers splaying against her velvet belly, digging into her softness, reaching for the ache that was forming in the pit of her stomach. His mouth was moving against her shining cap of hair, seeking the sensitive hollows at the nape of her neck. 
 He was handing control to her because she made him feel wildly out of control. She had never driven a man so wild with desire that he didn't know what he was doing...
"Henry, God, -" 
"don't say no, Y/n. Not now." He spun her tightly in his arms and she made a discovery that drenched her with sensuous delight. 
"Your clothes…" 
He had taken off his jacket and tie some time during his dark pursuit and unbuttoned his shirt so that it hung free from his broad shoulders. The hands that she had placed against his chest met with bare skin- hot, damp, satiny skin covered with thick, soft hair. His heart was almost leaping from his chest and he shuddered as she pressed her palm harder against him, marveling at the strength and power rippling beneath the skin.
"I got hot, chasing you," he said.  "I still am. Wanting you makes me that way. Hot and so ready that I can hardly stand!" 
He made a subtle movement with his hips and groaned as he brushed against the thick velvet folds of her dress. She felt a fresh moisture break out on his skin and in an instinctive gesture of acceptance leaned forward to nuzzle it from his chest, her mouth inadvertently brushing against one of his large, flat nipples in his nest of hair.
He made a choking sound in his throat, arching back to give her free access to his upper body and in the process ground his swollen hardness against the juncture of her thighs
"do it" 
Y/n barely heard his ragged plea. Henry was so exquisitely responsive to every tiny movement she made, even to the very breath from her lips upon his skin, that he was soon deep in the toils of a dreamy delirium. 
She  wasn't aware of the rip he made in the back of her dress when his shaking hands wrenched the zip down, only of the molten sensuality of his gaze as he steered her into a shaft of light near the window and studied her breasts. nestled in their cups of pure white lace. 
"Did you wear this for me?" he asked thickly, roughly tracing the outline of the lace across the curving swells. "Did you want me to take off your dress tonight, Y/n? To admire you like this?" 
 His arousal was so flatteringly intense that she couldn't deny him the truth.
 "Yes…" 
She closed her eyes, gasping as she felt the stroke of his thumbs across the seams, finding the rigid tips that were evidence of her own desire. He made a sound and she felt him kneel to pull her velvet gown over her hips, revealing the white panties and suspender belt in the same simple lace design as the bra, demure yet sexy in their essential femininity.
 He made another sound, this time deep and guttural, his hands running up the backs of her thighs, pulling them closer and parting them slightly. 
She opened her eyes, clutching at his naked shoulders as he moved his mouth hotly against the lacy front panel of her panties and pressed a string of kisses from the soft skin at the tops of her stockings to the deep, frantic pulse at the hollow of her hip. 
Y/n could feel the cool air along her pussy as warmth settled there. Rough hands sent a shiver through her body as they ran the length of her thighs, kneading her ass before finding their way back to her pussy, and pushing her panties to the side  for a better look at what she had to offer. Y/n shook and he purred in approval of her reaction.
Henry pressed forward until Y/n felt his lips along her folds, teasing her before delving deeper. Y/n gasped at the first taste, the tip of his tongue poking at her entrance, her arousal spilling forth. Henry ran the length of her pussy until he flicked her clit, the twitch it brought forth made him snicker into her skin. He dragged his tongue along her clit again, grazing it over and over as her pelvis flinched unwillingly.
“shit,” she hissed, trying not to moan though it felt so good.
Y/n clung onto his shoulders, the buzz she felt in her stomach coming closer to finding its release. Her thighs trembled as he grew more persistent, his tongue agile as it drew forth an orgasm but just before she could relish in the exquisite feeling, he pulled away. It had been almost a year since you had been pleasured by anything other than her own hands and this was starting to drive her mad. 
The sight of his dark head moving against her and the sensations he was creating made her cry out in helpless need and he looked up, a dark blush crossing his face when he saw her starlit expression. 
He stood and kissed her on the mouth until they were both breathless. Then, still holding her, he reached behind him, dragging the sheet off the nearest object.
It was a smooth, polished mahogany dining table, it's dark surface reflecting the muted lights from the moon.
Y/n imagined him laying her down on that smooth hardness and leaning over her, feeling the melting pleasure of his touch. 
Henry turned her, pressing her hips against the carved mahogany edge.
"I've never made love on a table before," she whispered raggedly, hoping that she wouldn't disappoint him with her relative inexperience. No doubt he was used to women who were terribly adventurous and sexually sophisticated. She thrusted the jealous thought away and linked her arms around his neck, reminding herself that she could make him shake with passionate need. She could make up with enthusiasm for what she lacked in experience and he would never know the difference. 
He stilled and she was afraid that she had destroyed the moment with her naive little confidence. Henry lifted his head and looked at the table behind her. Then he stopped and swept her off her feet, lifting her into his strong arms.
 "No, not here," he said hoarsely. "The first time should be in a bed.." He began to move with Y/n in his arms and she turned her hot face against his broad chest, adoring him for caring enough to make this exactly right for them. 
"I don't want to wait." She told him shyly of her need and his arms tightened, the muscles of his shoulders and neck bunching into prominence as his stride quickened.
 "You won't have to." He turned into another doorway, dipping an elbow against the wall until twin lamps glowed, their light filtered into a soft, golden delicacy by the cloths that swathed them. 
Henry didn't let her go as he removed the covering over the bed and stripped back the dark feather quilt. When he finally put her down it was on to crisp white sheets that released a lavender fragrance to mingle with the heated scent of arousal that perfumed their bodies.
Henry stood by the bedside, looking down at her. Then he spread his hands, revealing the light tremor that shook his hand ever so gently. 
 "Look what you do to me. You make me weak. No one has ever had that effect on me"  Y/n reached out a hand and touched his trident stomach. 
"You're the strongest man I know," her hand ran down his stomach and over the muscle underneath as she moved down to his belt. She tugged at it gently
"I want you" she purred. 
The knowledge of their mutual desire flared in his hungry eyes, hardening the planes and angles of his face until it looked as rigid as his body under her exploring hand. He caught her wrist before she would have touched him intimately, folding her arm back into the pillow behind her head he knelt beside her.
 "Say it again. Say my name." 
"I want you to make love to me, Henry." Her words were a promise to give him all that he wanted and more. 
"No more running?" he raised his eyebrow jokingly and Y/n shook her head, unable to speak as he unclipped the front fastening of her bra, sensing that he wanted her to lie quiescently as he bared the last secrets of her body. 
She felt shy, like a precious gift being gloatingly unwrapped, but she didn't resent his moment of purely masculine triumph. The glory of the moment was also hers, this beautiful man that she had known for so long finally hers. He was giving himself to her and asking nothing but what she was willing to give in return. For tonight and perhaps for many nights to come she would let him satisfy the hunger in her soul, colour the cold grey corners of her world with a warmth and vibrant life that would dispel, at least for a time, the loneliness she had come to accept many years ago. 
"I want you, too…" she whispered as she welcomed the joy of his touch. 
Henry undressed himself with a fumbling haste that she found inexpressibly exciting and when he came down on to her she gasped at the violent energy of his enthusiasm. Y/n stared up at him, his cock hanging out for all to see. 
The controlled, disciplined man she had grown to know vanished completely. In his place was a greedy, intemperate, ardent and impetuous male, urgently intent with plundering each and every lavish pleasure of flesh. 
Henry smirked, his hand slowly pumping his dick a few times before he bent down and slid the tip over her slit and pushed inside roughly, allowing her no resistance as he filled her entirely.
This moment when he took her would live vividly in her memory forever.
 The shocking reality of his first thrust stilled them both but then he stilled, chest shaking, half across her body, his head buried in the curve of her neck. 
'Surely he's not going to stop now,'  y/n thought hysterically as her body slowly adjusted to the agonising fullness, and she felt the involuntary ripples of tension begin to absorb him even more deeply into her being. 
 Y/n dropped her head back as she let out a low growl as he thrusted sharply, allowing a moment between each as they were jolted into the bed. His hands were on her hips, holding her down as he slid in and out. 
Relax and enjoy was about all Y/n was capable of doing as his sensual onslaught built towards a fiery climax. He devoured her, feasting on her body with blind hunger, biting lushly into her skin, sipping and suckling the sweetness from her achingly swollen breasts as his hands adjusted her body around his, moaning and shuddering so violently when she even lightly caressed his body with her own that she  resorted to merely riding the exquisite storm as he sank deeper than before. 
Henry groaned and y/n felt a sudden burst of warmth, his cum leaking down her legs as she let the feeling of her own orgasm near
She plunged a hand into his sweat-drenched hair, and pulled his head back.
"Henry-" 
The moan came quickly and she hardly recognised him as she gawked up at him. His mouth was full, reddened, the skin drawn tightly over the bones of his face giving him a lean, hollowed-checked wildness, his deep set eyes open but blank with inner turbulence. He looked almost totally insensate. 
Y/n felt shaken by a sudden wave of tenderness as his cock slid over a soft spot inside her, her fingers curling tightly into silky-damp hair.
"Henry--" 
The tenderness flooded her being and was just swiftly followed by another wave of intense feeling as Henry stiffened and pulled back slightly, the pupils of his eyes contracting, his jaw clenching as he fought the blind instinct that was relentlessly driving him. 
"I hurt you, didn't i." he gritted. "I went too fast for you. I'm sorry." He moved up on his braced arms and tried to withdraw further but she stopped him, almost sobbing.
"No... oh, no" 
Henry hesitated and she moaned again, this time a bitter protest, "No, please, no, not yet…" 
Y/n's pussy tightened and she murmured in delight as he slowly thrusted against her again, her sensitive walls sending a thrill up her spine.
She was fighting to hold on, and he watched, puzzled and then fascinated, as she moaned, her eyes wide with a strange fear and confusion. Her fingers slid laxly out of his hair to clench and unclench helplessly on the pillow. A deep rosy flush spread up from her damp, heaving breasts to mantle her throat and face. He realised then what was happening to her and waited, afraid to move again for fear of breaking the wondrous spell, watching hotly as the inexorable momentum built swiftly to a flashpoint.
 Only when she rolled her flushed cheek sideways into the pillow did he move, cupping her face with his strong hand, forcing her to look at him.
 "No, let me see... let me watch it happen to you...I want to watch" 
Her eyelids fluttered at his husky command, her blush deepened, but she was too enraptured to feel embarrassed, too stunned by the speed of it all to deny him anything he asked. Her mouth trembled and parted and she began to gasp in light, shallow breaths that made her flushed breasts quiver deliciously, invitingly. 
He bent and touched a stiff pink nipple experimentally with his mouth, very gently. She jerked and cried out, exploding beneath him in a series of violent convulsions that almost unseated him. He gripped her thighs and held her steady while she sobbed and moaned and poured herself into him, and then, as she melted lovingly around him he at last began to move, uncertainly echoing her undulating movements until he established his own powerful rhythm, this time driving her with him, until his raw shout of exuberant satisfaction signalled that the whirlwind was spent. 
~
In the morning Y/n  was grateful for the resilience of her relative youth. Even after a long hot shower, her muscles ached with the extravagance of her strenuous exercise. She felt as if she had been battered, not by one whirlwind, but several. And she had. If she had thought that Henry's incandescent passion would swiftly burn them both out she discovered, through the ravishing reaches of the night, that she was marvellously mistaken.
 His desire, like his curiosity about her body, had proved insatiable. And, although the second and third time they made love it was not with the stunning speed of the first, it was still fiercely, gloriously energetic. He encouraged a boldness in her that she hadn't known she possessed. 
He made her feel unutterably sexy, as if she was the only woman in the world who could satisfy his lavish appetite for lovemaking, and he devoted and demanded the same kind of single-minded commitment to creating pleasure that he did to his more worldly objectives. In short, he was every bit the fantastic lover she had imagined he was.
Y/n smiled to herself as she sipped her coffee. Was this a case of being hoist by her own petard? If so, everyone should have such a virile executioner! 
"You look quite disgustingly smug." 
 Henry had showered, brought her coffee and toast in bed and casually dressed in front of her with the ease of a man who was thoroughly satisfied with himself and the world in general.
"You're looking fairly smug yourself," she answered boldly. 
"Making love in the morning obviously suits us both and in the evening, and at night. By the way, what are you doing at lunchtime?" Y/n couldn't stop blushing and Henry smirked.
 She wasn't that bold - yet.
 If she and Henry were lovers for long she didn't doubt that she could become very, very brazen. 
"Eating," she said repressively. 
Henry refused to be repressed. "you're a wicked, decadent woman." He leaned over and tugged at the sheet that was tucked over her breasts and down to her waist. Y/n squeaked and held out her cup, afraid she would spill some of the hot liquid as he bent to lightly kiss her rosy softness. 
" is all of you on the menu, or just selected divine parts?" 
"You're a glutton!" Y/n murmured weakly, closing her eyes, shivering at the tingling pleasure his delicately teasing tongue evoked. 
"Ouch!" Henry winched, The coffee having splashed onto his cheek as y/n unconsciously let the coffee cup slip.
"Serves you right." She didn't pull up the sheet, sitting primly among the crumbs and cotton sheets, deliciously aware of the contrast between her nudity and his dark, formal suit as he moved away. 
He had told her he had an early meeting --one reason for the necessity to rouse her just after dawn by making love to her sleepy, languorous body. 
Waking up to find Henry inside her was just one of the new, fresh pleasures of life! 
"Will you meet me for lunch? This meeting should be over by then." He straightened his tie in front of the mirror then walked back to her.
"If you want me to…" He cupped her chin, reminding her of the way he had refused to allow her to hide from him last night.
 "I want you to. Make no mistake about that, y/n. I have no regrets. None." 
"Good." She lifted her chin and tried for a little of the sophistication he was no doubt used to. "I wouldn't like to think that I had disappointed you." 
To her annoyance, he laughed. He straightened, letting his fingers trail down her throat. "There wasn't much chance of that, believe me." 
"Oh, are you so confident of your prowess?" she snapped defensively, feeling suddenly restless and mentative. "You can turn any woman into your personal love machine?" 
He seemed unruffled by her irritable crudity, a strange smile still playing around his lips.
 "On the contrary. I'm afraid I have no basis for comparison." 
"What?" Y/n stared at him blankly.
He scooped up a slice of toast and bit into it. "Couldn't you tell, Y/n? Was my gift such a paltry thing? I thought one's partner could always tell." 
What was he talking about? To her horror, Y/n suddenly realised that, although he had used protection afterwards, that first, rough coming-together had been utterly spontaneous and Henry certainly hadn't held back. Did he purposely try to get her pregnant? Was he not really the man she thought he was? No- that couldn't be it. 
 "What gift? T-tell- me. what?" she stammered, raising her cup to hide the quiver of her mouth, hoping he wasn't going to prove as selfishly arrogant as she suspected!
" Why, that it was my first time, of course." And, as she continued to stare at him uncomprehendingly over the top of the cup, his smile gentled into a tender warmth. "You were my initiation, Y/n. I gave you my virginity, you gave me my manhood." 
And, leaving her gasping and choking with shocked disbelief, a pool of hot coffee soaking into the sheets around her, he calmly turned and walked out of the house, a new found pride in his stomach and so much more to be discovered.
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Taglist (added in reblog ❤️)
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cherryfinolahobbes · 2 years
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Sleepless
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Disclaimer: I do not own anything other than Cherry. All superheroes and such are owned by Marvel and Sony and whoever else. This is just a slice of fangirl pie.
A/N: I've been surprised to find out how much I enjoy writing Wong's pov. It's been fun finding a muse in the new Sorcerer Supreme.
Also, I've headcanoned that Kamar Taj is one of the Kingdoms of Heaven that was mentioned in the comics. They are pocket dimensions parallel to our universe, imbued with power to protect from outer dimensional threats and also include Ta Lo and K'un Lun.
Warnings/Spoilers: None, unless you havent seen any of Infinity War/End Game. This takes place during the five year blip.
Tags: @silvergryphon @kakashibabe02 @diaryofawriter
(If you would like to be tagged in my future stories please let me know)
Thank the Elder Scrolls for gateways, Wong thought as he laid the envelope, fat with cash on the wooden table. At least he didn’t have to take a bus or gods forbid, an Uber, home where people would gawk at his face. He would have to remember the girl’s name who had given him the injuries, he would certainly remember her severe hair cut and round house kick.
The Sorcerer Supreme rooted around in the freezer before coming across a bag of peas. He had intentions of making soup with it at some point, but for now he needed something for the gash above his eye and his throbbing split lip. He didn’t feel like wasting the energy on fussing with a spell. He placed the frozen bag of vegetables on his face with a groan of relief before shuffling back over to the table. He eyed the envelope of cash with mixed feelings. He had pride that he was able to go out and “bring home the bacon” as he’d heard someone say. The fights had started for money to keep the doors of the Sanctum opened, then he was finding he wanted to fight more. There was so much inside of him; so much anger, rage, loss, hurt, and fear since the Blip. Mediation didn’t help, furthering his studies didn’t help, but fighting. Yes, the fighting did help take the edge off.
Wong was debating on hobbling his ass down to the corner deli for an egg sandwich or putting in a grub hub order when a breeze moved through the still air of the Sanctum. The ancient place was letting him know that someone was here…
Grabbing up the envelope, Wong walked over to the counter and stuffed the money into a jar and made his way towards the grand foyer.
Who was it? An Avenger? Some Agent? Perhaps another Sorcerer or even an ambassador from one of the Heavenly Kingdoms?
Wong’s steps slowed in disbelief as he came into the foyer, lowering the bag of peas from his face, to see the Sanctum had allowed in a young woman that seemed to be popping up at every turn he took.
Cherry Hobbes.
The dark haired woman currently didn’t see him as he was approaching to her left. She was dressed in a champagne colored cardigan and blue woolen skirt to ward off the chilly spring evening. She had what appeared to be a casserole dish in her hands and his nose told him it had herbs, cheese and tomatoes in it. It smelled rich and guessing that she was holding it with two potholders, was still hot. His stomach growled so loud he thought he would betray him.
“Miss Hobbes…” He spoke up before approaching any closer, alerting her to his presence. Her head swiveling to him and he was a little surprised to see the lines around her otherwise bright eyes. It was late. Nearly midnight. “This…is a surprise…”
“I…” She seemed to have lost her voice a moment as perhaps whatever she had planned to say seemed to crumble as even she realized how ridiculous it seemed that she was here at this hour or maybe it was because she was getting a good look at his split face. “I know this is pretty irregular…”
“That is an understatement,” He agreed, his voice a little flatter than he intended, but his eye and lip were killing him. Still, if something was wrong, he didn’t want to chase her away. “Is everything okay…do you need something?”
“No,” Cherry shook her head, her eyes lingering on his wounds. He still had the bag of peas in his hand, his fingers going numb with it. “No, actually…um..this is going to sound silly,” She paused, waiting he supposed to see if he’d stop her, but he didn’t. He found most of the time, the best way to get people out of his hair was to let them prattle themselves out rather than him rushing through their story. “But…I’d come by to see if you needed something,”
That. That was new. The Sorcerer was quick to build up his stonewall, to keep his expression deftly composed, so as to not let his curiosity come through. Pink entered her cheeks as he didn’t give her any new ground and she continued. “Just…I…I-I’ve come to the realization that I came out of the blip relatively…okay. I lost people and…and it hurt..a lot, but I still have my family…” She turned towards him now, taking a few small steps in his direction. “I had the chance to defend my family thanks to you and…I I know that Doctor Strange was snapped. It didn’t feel right to not check in on you after everything-although I know um..maybe I should have waited until morning,” She smiled sheepishly as she went quiet.
The Snap had happened nearly a year ago. He had just been at Stark’s wedding earlier in the month. Although he didn’t know Cherry well, the Sanctum wouldn’t have let her in if it perceived her to be threat, and he had never known her to be anything but genuine.
“Perhaps…but I suppose your dish would be cold in the morning,” He observed, and she looked down as if she forgot she was holding the glass casserole.
“I cook when I can’t sleep,” She admitted, “I thought to leave it on the stoop if you didn’t answer the door,”
“You couldn’t sleep?”
She shrugged her shoulders. It would explain the lines around her eyes, “Who can anymore?” She said softly which was a true enough statement. The world had been turned upside down and it’s population cut in half. They were all suffering even after all this time.
“You’re very kind,” He said, the words feeling a little stiff on his tongue. Not because he didn’t believe them, it was just an alien feeling to have someone check in on him. Wong wasn’t exactly sure what to say other than, “Thank you,” He stepped forward finally, bridging the gap between them, hands extended to accept the pan from her. “Let me take this so you can be on your way. I’d imagine Stark will worry if he finds you gone,”
He could smell her perfume as he started the exchange, his hands bumping into her overly warm fingers, as she transferred the dish to his grasp. His memory was suddenly back at the wedding with her laughing in his arms. Wong chased away the silly images, blaming himself for getting hit in the head too often, only to find when he looked back at Cherry she hadn’t taken any steps back. She was still very much in his personal circle, eyes scrutinizing the gash on his brow bone and his fat lip.
“Those look painful,” She said, her voice soft with concern. Her eyes flitting from the wounds to his own face, dark brows knitting together. “Do you need help with them? I’ve gotten pretty good at patching Tony and the guys up…”
He was going to tell her no. He was going to say no and send her back home. She didnt need to be here. She was going to be a distraction and he had so much work to do still. There was so much that needed his attention as the laws of the arcane were still horribly out of balance from the Blip even after a year.
But he was tired.
And lonely, if he admitted it. Going back to Kamar - Taj was not the same now that he was Sorcerer Supreme.
He also didn’t want to admit that maybe…he liked the smell of her perfume too. He thought it might be nice if the scent lingered just a little longer.
“I won’t say no to a helping hand, but only if you eat a little with me, Miss Hobbes,” he said in compromise, still wondering if the lines under her eyes were strictly from lack of sleep.
“That sounds like a deal, Wong…and please, call me Cherry,”
“This way then, Cherry,” He said and turning, started to lead her down the hall.
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You said not to ask so please ignore this if you don't want to explain, but could you elaborate on your March 19th / May 1st theory? thanks!
ahfkafhksfh yeah no problem. its not a theory its just ... brain worms that have taken a specific shape but thats not new this is just the latest form. under a cut because i hate like. getting peoples hopes up over something ive entirely made up
greentext format but make it wordy
> i think frank has been like. suspicious lately. i dont know how to explain it beyond that. he’s done a LOT of press-but-not-press in the last month or so. sure, he’s definitely bored and stuck in his house like the rest of us, and he had a new EP come out, and the EP is technically the reason for the press. but it also ... isnt. like the bulk of it has been AFTER the EP came out, and none of it has been wholly focused on the EP. and to me, at least, it feels like, i dont know, easing the band back into public consciousness thru a press circuit without the band ACTUALLY doing a press circuit because MCR been pretty hard and fast about the ‘we dont need or want ur press’ when it comes to the reunion. 
> continuing off the last one, in the ... jim ward interview he did, i think? one of the more recent ones, at least - he got asked about his writing process and mentioned working with gerard in present tense. very very likely it meant nothing at all, but also like ... i dont trust him LOL part of me thinks it was on purpose. Im just suspicious of him after the broken clock thing. 
> not only did frank mention working with gerard in the present tense, for Months now, but especially during his recent mini press tour, frank has been really vague but consistent in talking about working with people on music remotely. id have to go looking for it and i dont feel like it, but it’s been something along the lines of ‘working with new people And people you know���. suspitcheous. 
> ONTO GERARD. Gerard like never uses social media. but then a couple days ago he pops up to mention franks EP (which is sweet) and makes sure to sign it so its like, obviously not something his social media manager wrote up for him. and in that post he mentions being down in the lab. and LORD KNOWS WHAT THE FUCK THAT MEANS besides the fact that he’s working on something. but hey, its gerard, when isnt he. 
> But Gerard’s also doing that charity stream on the 2nd. and we havent seen gerard in MONTHS. since august, maybe? and he’s not just speaking, hes PERFORMING. besides the shrine show, the last time he performed was for the muppet charity thing with ray in 2016, and before that, it was the last hes alien leg in 2015. None of us even expected him to perform when it got announced - it had to be confirmed by the event organizers. and that just ... pings something in my brain, same as franks little press tour. It’s gerard emerging from his cave, Being A Musician, you know? 
> SPEAKING of the last time we saw gerard, he teased us back in the summer by mentioning that he has something he’s been working on thats not comic book related that he cant talk about. maybe its a fucking line of hot sauces or a tripp collaboration. 
> Or maybe its music. 
> this is where we depart from reality a little bit more: 
> this has been trotted out again and again on here as a talking point, and i dither between agreeing with it or not, but: MCR spent two years planning their return. they had a plan, for whatever the fuck was supposed to happen - even if all that was supposed to happen was the tour. 
> and their plan got pissed on, doused in gasoline, set on fire, extinguished, and thrown into the mouth of a lion. But They Had A Plan. And theyve been fucking radio silent except the hipdot collab, and before that, rescheduling shows. I ASSUME their almost-year of silence has been them, in part, reformulating their plan. Changing whatever it was going to be to fit the new timeline, or making a back up plan in case things get worse. 
> But the original plan had them all free - as far as we know - after november of 2020. so they wouldnt have had active MCR stuff happening for the national anthem comic book release, the electric century album + comic release, the you look like death tua comic release. But those things still happened, because they didnt require having to be in the real world where the plague is. 
> so, what the worms hinge on, is that whatever the New Plan Is, Whatever They Are Doing Now, it involves waiting until all their obligations and projects that SHOULDNT have interfered with MCR stuff - but had to the potential to because of covid - ended. 
> and thats now. thats the next couple weeks. you look like death just finished up, mikeys album and comic are out, and national anthem finishes up in like a week in a half. 
> and then theres nothing (that we know of) until the rescheduled shows happen, or *knocks thrice on wood* they have to reschedule again. 
> and this is where we really enter crazy town:
> so i was thinking about all of these things, and the imagery / themeing for the return (what little we got of it) and how a year ago everybody was pulling out the wheel of the year trying to figure out what they would do next, and when. 
> and March 20th (i know i said march 19th originally, i’ll get into that) is Ostara. 
> if youre not vaguely witchy, its basically a festival for the spring equinox. light and dark are in balance, yadda yadda yadda. and i could go into full on insane depth about the black and white aspects of the return, the witchiness of an offering + a summoning but i wont. it boils down to: its the closest festival to when all of MCR’s calendars are clear as far as we know, and its almost a year to date of when they had to reschedule the shows. 
> and March 19th is a Friday. which is new music release day. Ostara / the equinox are technically on saturday, but its at 5am on saturday morning so ... technicalities. 
> so the worms in my brain say new single on march 19th. or Something on march 19th. or 20th. one of those days. 
> and the worms in my brain also say MCR are a bunch of cruel little shits, and theyre gonna make us wait before they give us anything substantial. 
> so we move to May 1st. 
> May 1st is also known as May Day, also known as Beltane. (We’re back to the wheel of the year for this one) Its the halfway point between the spring equinox and the summer solstice. And its a Saturday. which is NOT new music release day - but hey, its close enough. 
> may day is also like, similar to halloween / samhain in that the veil is supposed to be thinner on those days, and i think theres a connection the imagery and over-all plan wise between coming back on halloween, and possibly doing something on mayday. i dont think they just came back on halloween as a birthday present to frank. 
> so second single on may day, or album? or announcement that theres gonna BE an album? maybe they wont give us a single on ostara but just tease us with something. i dont know. but i think theres something here. 
> im aware this was a lot of words and i basically gave you nothing, but i can only give you what the worms give to me. 
> sorry for being the way i am. hope this helped. 
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wheelsupnthirty · 3 years
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talk too much || f.w.
x slytherin fem!reader
hi all! this is my first whole length fic i've written, but i simp so hard for fred weasley. its based loosely on the song "talk too much" by COIN (i suggest listening half way through!) anyway, hope you enjoy!
tw: swearing, kissing, mention of violence (playfully)
studying in the hogwarts library used to be a peaceful experience. that is, until a certain red-haired duo decided that the library was to be their new prank-planning office.
"you know who we should hit next fred?" the first asked.
"i bet i do brother" returned the second
"snape!" they shouted in unison.
you groan and turn yourself around to face the ginger pair that had made your last two weeks a living hell. "will you two shut it?"
they laugh at your way-too-serious remark and george decides to speak first.
"oh! look who's getting feisty, eh brother?"
"indeed she is, george, shall we shut it?"
"hmm i don't think so"
"well will you gits at least use a silencing charm or something? merlin you weasleys talk too much"
"alright alright y/l/n we'll keep it down, all in good fun"
good fun. right. it's always good fun when you fail your o.w.l.s because you had nowhere to study in peace. you'd tried the slytherin common room, but malfoy and his crew ruined that quite quickly. the great hall was packed constantly, and the room of requirement felt cold compared to the welcoming walls filled with old books and warm lighting that the library gave you. the worst part about it all was that you had begun to fancy the very boy who caused you so much frustration. you guess he wasn't too horrible in terms of looks, but that mouth never stopped running.
on the way to your potions class, your favorite, but filled with people who ticked you off the most, you almost had a heart attack, courtesy of one frederick weasley. he had been developing a new "device" that spit out mini fireworks out of thin air. his lab rat? you.
"what the fuck weasley? what in the bloody hell is wrong with you?"
in between fits of laughter he managed to get out "new project" and "havent-(hahaha)-name-(snort)-yet"
"i swear to merlin fred, one more prank and i swear i'll shove a firework up your arse" you spat out, gathered your books and silently cursed all past, present and any future weasleys.
"today, students, we will be making amortentia, i'm sure you're all familiar, so get busy" echoed the nasally voice of one severus snape. of course, you listened and began reading the directions that were neatly inked onto the parchment in front of you. to no one's surprise at all, you were the first to finish, and you had made it perfectly. the only problem was that snape decided to "suggest" that those who had successfully brewed their amortentia should share with the rest of the class what their's smelled like. you weren't worried at first, until you smelled yours.
"miss y/l/n, you will go first"
"erm," you wafted the mist to your nose, "smoke" specifically from a firework, but you were not about to say that out loud. "sweets, and cinnamon." you stepped back from your cauldron and tried not to think about the smell that you first identified. it was just from earlier. there was no way that fred weasley was going to be your soulmate. your stupid crush on him was simply a coping mechanism for his idiotic pranks that plagued you..right?
"thank you, miss y/l/n. mister weasley- not you george- since you think this class is so hilarious, you will go next"
you shot up and looked at fred, hoping that what he'd smell wasn't you, but he noticed your gaze. "no problem professor!" he said cheerfully with a smirk, and a wink tossed at you. "mine smells of mint and-" he took a bigger, more dramatic sniff, "lavender" he said, a tad more serious than just a second before. only you seemed to notice, though, as no one else seemed to think anything of it.
fred sat back down next to his counterpart and put on his usual jovial personality for everyone to see. you can't stop thinking about your potion, though. it was just your robes. just leftover from his prank. suddenly, a paper airplane hits the side of your head. you sigh and roll your eyes, because you know just who it came from.
gryffindor common room, 11:00 tonight. please. we need to talk. f.w.
no way in hell you were meeting him there. it was probably just another prank. you want him to know that you know what he's up to, so you crumble the piece of parchment right in front of him.
later that evening, you escape to the library, but only when you've made sure there were no freckled, ginger men infesting it. studying, however, proved extremely difficult. you wanted to know what fred wanted. your curiosity seemed to take control of your actions as you stood up and made your way to the gryffindor common room. you snuck up to the fat lady and she looked at you, eyebrow raised, and very plainly asked, "password?" shit you didn't even think about needing a password. before you could utter a gibberish guess, the painting opened and fred crept out from behind it.
"you came, good" he said, genuinely relieved that you had showed up.
"what is it you want, weasley?" you whispered, slightly annoyed with yourself for ending up here in the first place.
"amortentia. mint and lavender. d'you know who that is?" he asked you.
"why would i know who your soulmate is, fred? and why do you care anyway? it's not like you're gonna find them tonight."
"and here i though you were brilliant, y/n" you were shocked, that was the first time he had ever called you by your first name.
"if you wanted to annoy me, you could have just pulled another dumb prank. shoved some fizzing whizbees in my coffee or something. you didn't have to call me here" with that, he had given up, putting on his normal persona.
"you're right, thanks for the idea y/l/n i'll have to try it on you sometime. i'm sure george will get a kick out of it as well. d'you think whizbees or puking pastilles? you know what, i'll surprise you instead!" he smiled. he loved riling you up, you're cute when you're angry.
"you talk too much" you said, and with a turn of your heel, you were on your way back to your dorm.
"and you study too much! you can't take a joke to save your life, y/l/n, maybe one of these days you'll come over here and shut me up yourse-" he was cut off by your lips being newly placed on his. it was all in a feat of shutting him up. then you realized what you had done.
stay cool, it's just a kiss
"why you gotta be so talkative?" you said, impressively keeping your composure. fred, on the other hand, was completely shellshocked, frozen. "what's the matter weasley? never been kissed before?" your words went in one ear and out the other for him. he couldn't care less what your lips said when they weren't on his.
he grabbed your wrist and pulled you back to him, earning a gasp from you, which he used to his advantage. he slipped his tongue in your mouth and savored every inch of you. you had forgotten everything you had been mad about before. your hands found his hair and tangled themselves in it. he melted into you, moving his hands to your legs, and hoisting you up around his waist. he carried you to the couch in the middle of the common room, and laid you down quick. amidst all the snogging, you remembered your anger from before and promptly pulled away.
"i.. i have to go. this was a mistake." you said quietly, trying to compose yourself enough to leave the couch.
"was it? it was you i smelled, y/n. the mint from your toothpaste? the lavender from your perfume? it's always been you." he sounded so sincere, something you'd never thought in a million years you'd hear. "stay, please"
he leaned toward you again and cupped your cheek in his hand. he pulled you just close enough that you would have to close the gap between you. you hesitated for a moment, but kissed him again. he seemed to mimic your every move with complete perfection. he linked his fingers with yours and deepened the kiss until you had to come up for air. you stared into his cinnamon eyes for what seemed like eternity until you noticed movement in the corner of the room. fred followed your eyes and said,
"george what the hell mate? how long you been standin' there?"
"oi don't let me get in the way of your snogging, simply left my books down here." he replied, with the cheekiest wink you had quite possibly ever seen. your face grew hot and you shuffled out from under fred, making your way quickly out of the common room. fred wasn't letting you get away that easy, though.
"same time tomorrow?" he asked slyly.
"in your dreams, weasley." you half-jokingly replied. you knew he'd be in yours tonight.
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perksofhs · 4 years
Text
‘So... the weather?’
This is a little AU piece that was requested! The prompt: Hey could you do a one shot where harry and famous reader are in a talk show and he has a crush on her. Maybe he accidentally hurts her while playing a game and he feels awful about it orrr maybe the host put a video where harry says that the reader is his crush and he gets nervous and embarrassed.
Promoting a movie was all but glamourous. It was a constant string of 14 hour days, 5am wake up calls and repetitive questions about working with this person or that person with very little time spent discussing the actual plot of the film. The savior of press tours was any interview where you werent alone, whether it was a joint interview with cast mates or a full couch talk show.
You’d been on the Late Late Show once in the past and you had to be honest, it was so much fun. Your first appearance included a 7 minute long musical medley involving fifteen quick changes and you very nearly faceplanting the floor.
By this point you were sitting in the dressing room, your hair being tugged one way or another by David your hairdresser, with your make up artist Cam working his magic on your noticabley exhausted face. “Who am I on with tonight Maggie?” you ask your manager, realising no one had actually told you. Maggie looked up from her laptop, a smirk on her lips. “James told me not to tell you so you’ll have to wait!” she said smugly. You rolled your eyes, “Of course he said that, that man has to stop trying to set me up”. James was a good friend, the two of you having met a number of times through industry parties award shows. He’d always try and find the mosyty eligible bachelor in the room and push you towards them just to shit you. Suffice to say none of them worked out.
Once your hair and makeup were done and you were dressed in a cute but entirely impractical and kind of uncortable outfit, a crew member came to get you and walk you down to the stage. “Ok so once we get to the stage, you’ll hear James announce your name, walk down the steps through the audience, wave or high five whatever you feel like. Then greet James and take a seat, then he’ll then announce the next guest”. You nodded along politely, already knowing the drill. “By chance, do you know who the other guest is?” you say shooting Maggie a smug look. “Yeah its Harry Styles” with that your heart skipped a beat, you’d always found him attractive and incredibly charming which is something you had stupidly mentioned to James once or twice. “That bastard” you say under your breath, you didnt have much time to think about it though because not even 30 seconds later you rounded a corner and there he was.
He was a gorgeous as ever, wearing what you could only assume with a gucci knitted jumper with a delicate lacy collared shirt beneath it, his signature pearls hanging perfectly around his neck, and a pair of cream flared pants. The outfit was quintessentially Harry. He was chatting to another random crew member who seemed to be giving him the same speech. You could hear James wrapping up whatever he was talking about, you were too distracted to follow it, you couldnt look away from the man 8 feet away from you. “You good?” Maggie says, pulls you from your bewildered state, Maggie’s words also caught the attention of Harry who finally looked in your direction.
Harry’s eyes landed on you and unbeknownst to you he was just as taken by the sight of you. Realising his gaze was lingering, Harry snapped himself out of it “Hey i’m Harry, nice to meet you” he said, taking a few steps towards you, his hand awkwardly out for a hand shake, something Harry was already kicking himself for doing. You took his ring clad hand in yours briefly “Hey I’m-” before you could finish you could hear James announce your name, you let out a laugh “that’s my queue”. It was probably a good thing that James has inadvertently introduced you, who knows whether you could have actually remebered your own name in that moment.
You descend the stairs, meeting James at the bottom with a friendly hug before taking your place on the couch. “Can you also put your hands together for the incredible Harry Styles!” James proclaims, the audience erupting once more, you watch Harry interact with the audience effortlessly as he makes his way down the stairs, having a bromance moment with James before he plops down next to you, sitting closer than you had expected him to. “So have you guys met before?” James says, knowing full well the answer is “No we haven’t, we met briefly backstage” Harry says. He couldnt stop thinking about how awkward he’d made the initial encounter but he couldnt help it.
Throughout the interview it was all too clear that sparks were flying bewteen the two of you. Harry had talked about his new music, you’d talked about your new film, an anecdote or two thrown in from the both of you. all was going smoothly until about 15 minutes in when James began to look very smug. “Now Harry, I know you two hadn’t met before but from what I hear you have quite the crush huh?” Harry’s cheek went bright red knowing exactly what was about to happen. You on the other hand had zero idea what was going on. “And how would you know that James?” Harry says trying to pretend he has no clue what James was referring to. “Funny you should ask my friend, this clip might just answer that for you!”
Your eyes darted to the nearest screen as the clip rolled, it was an interview from the press tour of the movie Harry had been in last year. The interviewer had asked the cast who they’d love to work with on future projects and to your surprise, Harry’s pick was you. The interviewer then asked why you were his choice, Harry’s response was “she’s just so talented, every time I watch her in something I’m just profoundly captivated. Her on screen presence is incredible.” One of his castmates laughed, playfully poking Harry in the shoulder adding "If it wasn’t already obvious he’s got quite the crush! He made us watch like 4 of her films during our set downtime” before the clip ended.
Harry dramtically buried his head in his hands out of sheer embarrassment as the audience let out a series of ‘oooohs’ and whistles and James burst out laughing. You let out an laugh as you awkwardly fiddled with your fingers, not entirely sure what you were menat to say or do in that moment. "Well then Harold, go on, ask her out. Nows your chance!” James goaded. Harry was utterly mortified but wasnt the least bit surprised. “So... the weather?” the audience laughed at Harry’s miserable attempt at changing the subject. “Alright alright i’l drop it but you can’t say I didnt try! Just remember this moment when you get married ok?” James said, throwing his hands up in defeat as he got in one last playful jab.
The rest of the interview went awkwardly by, although you were a little distracted. Did he really have a crush on you? How could he have a crush on you? You’re the one who had the crush on him, surely he didn’t feel the same?  James wrapped up the interview and once the cameras had cut both you and Harry made your way backstage.
“Well that was sufficiently awkward and I apologise for how uncomfortable I’m sure that made you. I’m honestly gonna fucking kill James for that” Harry said, you could only giggle in response. “He has no idea what’s coming the next time we catch up. In all fairness, despite how uncomfortable that whole ordeal was, it was lovely to meet you” the two of you smiled at each other. “It was lovely meeting you too Harry, no need to apologise, I bloody knew he was up to something. anyway, I have to head back to my dressing room, I’ll see you around” you say before starting to walk away. You only make it a few steps before Harry stops you “Hey wait! What are you doing this afternoon? This was my last interview for the day and I was gonna head from here to get some food. Wanna come along?” You pause for a moment to think about what the rest your day looked like before smiling back at him “Well, I had planned to go home and eat some left over chinese in front of a film... but I like your idea better. Swing by my dressing room on your way out?” Harry could conseal his happiness with your response, a giddy grin now plastered on his face “It’s a date, but we have to make a deal that neither of us tell James ok? You know how smug he’d be. Deal?” Harry said with a wink, reaching his hand out to seal the deal. You laughed as you shook his hand once more, this time a little less awkard than the first encounter. “My lips are sealed. Now you better not take too long, I’m starving!” you say as you walk away with a smirk and as they say, the rest was history.
Hey lovelies, I hope you enjoyed this one! And I hope the anon who requested it thinks I did an ok job! I havent done many request pieces. Also I know its not super long but I still think its pretty adorable.  Requests are open, just shoot me a message and I’ll see what I can do! xx
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gracelessfighters · 4 years
Text
i fall apart
JJ Maybank x female reader
Masterlist
Summary: kinda like a quick little travel through the relationship between reader and JJ as things get progressively worse (shit summary sorry)
Word count: 1.5k
Warnings: hella angsty, cheating, thats it? im mentioning angst again 
A/N: i’ve had a really bad day today and i wasn’t originally going to write anything because i wasn’t in the mood, but i had this idea and have literally been crying whilst writing it hence the ANGST (not that this situation applies to me tho i’m just emotional) also havent really read through this so ignore the mistakes
~ italics are flashbacks
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“Hi, I seem to have lost my phone number, can I have yours instead?” The blue eyed boy said, distracting you from the large crowd around you, the music fading in the distance as you looked at him and laughed.
“I think that’s the worst pick up line I’ve ever heard,” you say, still smiling at him, “but I suppose I can give you credit for trying, why don’t we start off with names blondie.”
“I’m JJ.”
“I’m Y/N, nice to meet you.” You beamed at him, taking his hand and leading him away from all the people on the beach.
That was the night you met JJ, the night your life became so much better and so much worse in the blink of an eye. If you could, you would make it so you never met him, that way at least you wouldn’t be feeling so empty, so broken and in the most pain you’d ever experienced right now.
You sagged back against the sofa, tears welling in your eyes as another memory of your time with JJ hits you without warning.
“Do you two ever stop with the PDA?” Pope scowled at the two of you, you were sprawled across JJ’s lap, his hand intertwined in yours, your lips still a little swollen from the long kisses JJ would steal from you whenever he caught your eye.
“You’re just jealous man,” JJ grinned at Pope, moving to stroke your leg, “jealous that I have an incredible girl on my lap who loves me.”
Your heart flutters as JJ talks about you, this sound too loud for you to hear the small voice in the back of your head notice that he only said you loved him, not the other way around.
But it didn’t matter, you did love him, he was currently one of the only good things in your life, and even if you felt a little wary about his feelings towards you, you knew that was probably just him struggling to admit them, not because they weren’t there.
If only you hadn’t been so naive, so ready to love a troubled boy whose smile and jokes melted your heart, and whose body made you feel faint. Even though you felt he did love you in his own way, he was not the type of boy to commit - to love forever and without fear. Not like you wanted.
You balled your hands into fists, anything to try and calm the shaking that travelled through your body as you began sobbing once again.
You pulled up to the chateau, hoping JJ was there as he hadn’t showed up to your date. You had waited for hours at the table you were meant to share a meal at, both staff and customers looking at you pitifully, not understanding why you refused to order anything because “he was coming, he just must have gotten caught up with something.”
It had taken closing time of the restaurant to lift the hopeful fog from your eyes, as you got into your car, one lonely tear fell down your face. You had been planning this date for months, something special for your four month anniversary - not that four months was a long time in the scheme of things but as the rest of the pogues said, JJ wasn’t one to commit for more than one night normally, so it should be celebrated.
And you thought he wanted to celebrate it too, even answering your text earlier confirming the details of tonight with an excited reply, as if he loved you - he obviously didn’t though.
The chateau seemed quiet from outside, the only sound were the bugs that appeared at night and the soft sniffles from you as you composed yourself, ready to see why JJ hadn’t shown up. You prayed that he had drank too much, that would be the only time you’d be happy if he had, as it meant the answer you feared wasn’t the correct one.
An overwhelming sense of dread came over you as you opened the door and entered the messy but homely place John B lived in. The door to the guest bedroom was closed, maybe he was just sleeping? He might’ve worked too hard today in all the kook’s gardens. Yes that was probably it.
You took a deep breath in and opened the door, wishing you had prepared more for the likely reality, as that was what you were met with. You could feel your heart break as JJ’s eyes opened at the sudden noise, quickly removing himself from the grip of the naked girl beside him when he realised it was you.
You didn’t want to be here, but you couldn’t move or breathe, all you could do was mutter a small “oh”, as your mind caught up to what your eyes were seeing. JJ already scrambling out of the bed, rushing to get his shorts on so he could try and talk his way out of this.
Your body finally moved, your feet carrying you away from the worst thing you’d ever seen, trying to help you escape before you broke completely.
You knew that image was going to forever live in your mind, hell it was there right now - the sleeping girls face so calm and content, and JJ’s was panicked as he realised he hadn’t gotten away with it. Did that girl have something you didn’t? Was she prettier? Or did JJ just never feel the way you did, instead using you as a placeholder until he could use a stupid pick up line on the next girl to walk past him?
That had happened yesterday, and you had barely stopped crying since, your whole body was now weak from the pain you were feeling, the dehydration from the tears that had been shed and from barely moving off your sofa.
Ten missed calls, that was all the effort JJ had put in trying to talk to you, you had seen his name and face appear on your screen each of these times, but you couldn’t bare to hear his excuses right now, couldn’t bare to hear the voice you loved. It hurt a little that he had stopped at ten, not even a text of ‘I’m sorry’ had been sent, just a few calls. And without you answering he must’ve given up, no longer caring about you and even if you hated to admit it he was probably with the pretty blonde girl.
That was until he knocked at your door, shouting for you to let him in to ‘explain.’ You knew he wouldn’t leave if you refused to open it, and honestly you would rather get this over with so you can go to bed, hold a pillow to your chest and cry.
His face was full of guilt when you opened the door, almost enough for you to forgive him then and there, almost.
“Y/N, please it was a moment of weakness I’m sorry.” He said as he walked past you, turning to face you once he reached the lounge.
“It was our anniversary date tonight JJ.” You hated how small your voice sounded, but the pain in your chest had muted any of the fiery emotions you wanted to feel right now.
“Oh shit,” he mumbled, “we can reschedule it, do it next week instead, put this whole thing behind us.”
You shook your head, “No, we can’t just put it behind us. You betrayed me JJ, I loved you and I know now you never loved me, I just wish you had given me the courtesy of telling me before I found you in bed with someone else.”
You wanted to shout or scream, anything to express how hurt you were, but all that came out was a small voice, one that had been broken like never before, and you weren’t sure if it would ever go back to normal.
“I do love you Y/N,” he moved to grab your hand, only for you to step back, “please, I really do love you.”
“No you don’t, I’m not even sure you can love me. At least not the way I want.” You took a breath before continuing, “I want someone I can melt around. I want someone who melts around me too… I don’t want this standoffish, unromantic love that you’re offering. I want more than that and I think I deserve more too.”
He couldn’t look into your sad eyes that contained only the truth, so he walked away, away from you and your relationship until he was out of your house and on his bike, heading somewhere you didn’t care about.
As soon as the door shut, you collapsed, the breath leaving you body. And as you sobbed, all you could think about was how you wished you had never met JJ Maybank.
----
tags: @outerbankslut​
this is highkey really bad but oh well 
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davidpastrsnack · 3 years
Text
buckle up besties, roommate anon is about to make you literally cry with this recap
(1) ok so. tyler’s family were scary but they ended up being so nice. when we first got there his brother asked me how much tyler paid me to be there 💀 tyler nudged him and said knock it off. then his brother said “well tyler, glad youre finally bringing a girl home” and his mom had come in just then. and scolded ty’s brother lol. his sister just said hi from the couch and ty went up to her and whispered something. and then they did a handshake which was so cute 🥺 i asked ty’s mom if she needed help with dinner. she took me up on that. it was nice talking to her. she was really sweet. we talked and even got to joking around. so thats good. ty’s dad came home in the meantime and said hi. he talked to me a bit too. ty’s sister was still a bit standoff-ish at dinner. she wasnt mean. just didnt really interact with me. she was the hardest to win over. but she did compliment my outfit. i appreciated that i changed three times she mentioned she needed new clothes for when school starts. i told her if she needed a shopping buddy to let me know. and she was like “really? can we go tomorrow?” and i looked at ty bc i had no clue what he had planned. and he sighed and was like “well i had plans to show her around tomorrow” and i gave him a look and he goes “but i guess we can do that after you guys get back” so next day i woke up before ty and got ready. then just sat there until he was up bc i was too scared to go downstairs alone lol. when we did go it was just his parents awake. his mom had me sit with them while ty made coffees lol. his mom told me they enjoyed having me here. and that tyler hasnt brought a girl over since his hs gf. who wasnt allowed to spend the night lol. and she told me he seemed really happy and…in l-word with me 🙈🙈🙈 oh and she said to not pay too much attention to his sister’s behavior bc she’s just jealous she’s not getting all of ty’s attention lmao. then later i took his sister shopping. we found a pair of earrings we both thought were cute so i bought myself and her a pair. she was really thankful and sweet. we ended up talking and she warmed up to me. especially when i said “you know youre just as amazing as tyler says” and she was like “what?” and i said “he talks about you all the time. i was really excited to meet you because he always says youre his best friend” i think she started to like me more after that. idk i tried to show her that im not stealing her brother from her lol. oh and me and her talked about boys and she mentioned this one guy. i was like oh is he cute and she blushed. i go omg do you have a crush on him. she was so red and told me i couldnt tell ty lol. when we got back though, ty’s brother had friends over. they were asking his sister who her friend was. she rolled her eyes lol. so sassy. then they were introducing themselves to me and ty’s brother was like “she’s not interested. she’s in college and is my brother’s girlfriend” i had to hold myself back from laughing that im in college came first and then ty’s gf. but in their introductions i learned that the boy ty’s sister has a crush on is her brother’s friend 🙈 oh girl. i gave her a look. she ran upstairs to put her stuff away lol.
(2) oh and during all this ty was at the store bc his mom sent him to run errands lol. so i chilled with her. helped her get some stuff ready since we were doing a cookout for dinner that night. ty finally came back. his mom shooed us out of the kitchen and told us to go have fun and then when we were putting on our shoes to go she yells “not too much fun though” 🙈 ty’s brother and his friends were snickering. high schoolers smh 🙈 so ty drove us and showed me around. it was fun. it was cute hearing his stories and memories and seeing how excited he got at some things. tbh i think i was giving him heart eyes more than i was looking around 🙈🙈 idk if i can explain it. just seeing him in his element. and a whole new level of relaxed and at home and domestic. idk. maybe youll get it 🙈 he also asked me how shopping with his sister went. so i told him about that minus her crush i aint a snitch. and i told him about his brothers comment lol. he goes “he’s so ridiculous he literally told his friend there was gonna be a college girl at his house. and he told me that you were too hot for me” that one made me giggle. ty said he smacked his brother for that one lol. i said “well i think you’re too hot for me. i mean look at you” he said “what the fuck are you talking about. i’m the luckiest guy in the world for managing to snag you” which 🥺🥺🥺 he was driving so i leaned over and kissed his cheek. bc it was so cute. and kate🙈🙈🙈 bestie 🙈🙈🙈 im only telling you this (and my other anon friends) bc i trust you guys. i havent told anyone else 🙈 but… i was really close to saying the three words to him 🙈🙈 really really close. but i got scared 🙈 it feels too soon. or that maybe its just in my head bc of what his mom said. idk.
(3) i maybe repeated some of this bc i forgot where i left off. we drove around some more. parked and walked around at a few stops. i maybe asked him about his hs gf 🙈 he said they werent really compatible and she was nice but they were better as friends and dated more bc of the pressure of dating. he was very open and honest about it though and that just made me more 🥺 we went to a park with a really nice overlook. then you have to walk through a forest and theres another more secluded one. we were going to kiss but i said “did you take all the girls here” and he said “no, i actually only ever came here alone. youre the only one” and i gave him a 🥺 look. he was a little pink. and i really really wanted to say it again 🙈 but i just kissed him instead. and then we made out 🙈🙈 for a decent amount of time actually. it felt like we were the ones in hs lol. then we were gonna go back. but our lips were a little swollen and red 🙈 so we went to get ice cream instead. then we went back to ty’s. his brother made a comment about us being gone for a while and was smirking. ty flicked him😭 oh and omg kate this was so cute 🥺 so they have these really cute lights in their backyard. his mom is super trendy lol. and they had music playing the whole time. eventually everyone went inside. they refused to let me help bc i had helped enough. i told ty i wanted to sit outside some more. it was so cute out there. the music was playing softly and i was cuddled up with ty and wearing his sweatshirt. it was a good vibe and i wanted to enjoy it.
(4) so we were sitting there quietly. he was just rubbing my shoulder with his thumb since his arm was around my shoulders. and then omg kate 🙈 this is so cheesy 🙈 thinking out loud by ed sheeran came on. ty got up and held his hand out. and asked “dance with me?” i had the biggest grin on my face and nodded. so we danced in his backyard 🙈 just like swayed back and forth nothing fancy. he was spinning me around and i was laughing. eventually we weren’t even dancing just laughing and swaying and trying to get each other to spin 🙈🙈🙈 until he finally pulled me in and we swayed again. i really almost said it again 🙈 but then he leaned down and kissed me. it was soft and sweet. we didnt stay out too long after that. but then we got ready for bed and stuff and he ran downstairs bc his brother used his phone charger and left it downstairs. and when he came back up he was so red. and i was like “are you good? did you just run a marathon or something?” and he flopped down on the bed next to me and groaned. he goes “my whole family saw that” and i said “saw what” and he goes “us dancing and the kiss. i just got hardcore roasted” and then i was like “oh” and he goes “my mom and sister think were adorable. my dad said i need to learn how to dance” which made me laugh. and then he goes “my brother told me my kissing game was weak and my mom glared at him and said it was respectful, which is how you should treat girls.” i hid my face in his chest and said ty this is so embarrassing. he said “your fault for laughing so hard it got their attention” but he said it jokingly lol. i said “maybe take your dads advice and learn to dance so i dont have to laugh” which made him laugh and squeeze my side. that made me squeal and i go oh no that was so loud. tyler was cracking up. but then he got serious and told me he was glad i was getting along with his family 🥺 he told me i fit with them well and that hes glad i was able to bond with his siblings, especially his sister 🥺🥺🥺
(4? 5? fuck i forgot again) and then today i woke up first before anyone else. so i threw on tyler’s sweatshirt and went and sat outside again. just enjoyed the morning. ty’s mom came out and asked me how i slept and all that. then told me she saw us two dancing last night. and she told me her son was clearly in l-word with me and then she smirked over her coffee mug and said “i think the feelings mutual” and took a sip of her drink. SHES SUCH A SAVAGE 🙈🙈🙈 i took a sip of my coffee just so i didnt have to respond and i could feel my whole face was on fire. but then she goes “you two are really sweet and im glad you make him so happy” and i said “he makes me happy too. you raised a great guy” and she smiled at me. then she told me stories about her and her husband meeting and stuff. and also about raising tyler. then his dad came out and brought breakfast. he also added in some stories. oh and his mom asked for my number and she sent me a few pictures she took of me and ty when we were sitting outside and when we were dancing 🙈🙈 idk how neither of us noticed them watching us through the window. but the pictures were cute. ty and his brother came downstairs and also ate with us. then ty and i went on a walk around their neighborhood which was nice and peaceful. when we got back we chilled with his family some more. his sister was awake too and asked me to help her with makeup. so we went to her room. and she was like “you and my brother are cute” 🥺 and she goes “that kiss was like a movie kiss” and i blushed 🙈 she told me how she hasnt had her first kiss and asked me about mine and stuff. it was kinda cute that she trusted me to like ask questions and be open. she was more open about her crush too and told me how he talked to her yesterday and gushed about how cute he was. i just let her go with it lol. and then she told me it was nice having a girl to talk to like a sister bc she cant talk to her brothers about that stuff 🥺🥺 so i told her if she ever wanted to talk she could reach out to me. so now she follows me on insta and has my number lol. then we sat with the fam again and had lunch and then it was time for ty and i to leave. everyone in his family gave me a hug 🥺 and they told me i should visit again 🥺 so it started off really scary but his family dynamic is so cute and they were all nice.
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