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chi-hoon · 3 years

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first time with wish

›　KWAK DAWIT X F!READER ›　WARNINGS: CURSING, SMUT ; VANILLA SEX, VIRGINITY LOSS (BOTH VIRGINS), FINGERING, EXPLICIT PROTECTED SEX ›　WC: 1.5K ›　A/N: reposted from justkeums to this blog! (separating sfw and nsfw content) this is probably the first nsfw epex content out there for the only legal member… so im nervous- but whatever. you can choose not to read it if you’re uncomfortable about it :>

you are each other’s first love, and you’re both sure that you’re also going to be each other’s last love. the two of you have been together for a while now, and you have felt that it’s about time to take another step in the relationship.

the sexual desire you felt started during your makeout sessions that grew more intense. you instinctively move yourself towards his lap. both of your hands reached places that you’ve once been shy about, but now, it seems like that fear and hesitation were gone. when he heard you moan in his touch for the first time, both of your eyes fluttered open. you stared at each other for a second before turning away and awkwardly ending your makeout session.

after that moment, your mind gives you dirty thoughts at the most random moments. when you see him sweat after working out, you wonder if he would sweat as much as when he’s thrusting inside you. afterward, you felt a wet feeling down your underwear.

it hasn’t been also easy for dawit. ever since that moment, even when you’re wearing any type of clothing, his eyes would scan your body as if he was undressing you. the hardest part is trying to hide his growing bulge in his pants whenever he suddenly gets turned on.

after a few days of pining, dawit’s the first to break this sexual tension between the two of you and you confess that you feel the same. you both feel relieved and thrilled at the same time.

“are you sure about this?” dawit asks you for the hundredth time. he really wants you to feel safe and not forced in any way.

“yes. i’m sure because i love you and i trust you.” you enclose his hands in between yours and he flips your hands to interlock his fingers with yours.

“i love you too. and if you ever feel uncomfortable midway, tell me to stop. this is also my first time so i’m not really sure if i’m doing it right.” you give him a comforting smile while stroking his face.

the two of you start it off with kissing that soon turned into open-mouthed ones. you wrap your arms around his neck for support while his hands creep up beneath your shirt. his hands ghost through your sides and back. he lays you down the bed gently, with him on top. his lips start to travel down to your neck and you let out a low moan when you feel him sucking a certain spot. hearing you like that makes him grind towards your core. he doesn’t have to worry about that after hearing you moan loudly at the friction. even before, you have always loved his neck kisses during your makeout sessions.

“more.” you beg him, almost inaudible from your heavy breathes.

“gladly.” he softly chuckles at the sight of you being so vulnerable.

he has never seen you like this before and it turns him on even more. he grinds on you again, even harder, making him feel the budding wetness in your core.

“dawit- ah! please, take it off.” you tug at the hem of his pants, desperate to feel him more.

he was also starting to get annoyed with it because he wants to feel you raw, skin to skin. he strips down to his underwear and helps you pull your bottoms down. you hesitate in taking off your bra for a second and he respectfully waits for you.

“can i?” he looks at your breasts and to you. you nod and lie back down on the bed to show that you’re giving consent.

dawit leans down, taking one at his hand and the other with his mouth. he plays with it using his fingers, twisting and pinching it lightly, while his tongue twirls around the other one and sucks it sweetly. your mind goes crazy at the sensation. he’s just damn good at using his tongue. you grind at his hard-on, missing the contact down there. he groans at your action. with both of your pants gone, you feel his member more on your clit, making his underwear stained with .

“shit- let’s do it, babe.”

“yes, please.” you nod, eager to take him inside you.

you watch him take off his underwear, revealing his dick already hard and standing tall. it’s your first time seeing his dick in clad glory. seeing his size and girth only made you want him more inside you. he felt a bit shy when you stare at it, but totally forgets about it when he sees how soaked you are in your underwear. you let him remove it, dragging it down your legs.

“you’re this wet for me?” you whimper at his touch as his fingers run through your folds with his middle finger teasing your entrance. he feels proud at his work of art and his cock twitches at the thought of it pushing inside you, but he didn’t want to scare or hurt you.

“have you touched yourself before?”

“yes.” you shyly reply. the thought of you masturbating because of him turned him on more.

“i’ll insert my finger. tell me if it hurts.”

his index finger went in easily inside you halfway because of how wet you are. you gasp at the weird feeling but you enjoyed it. then he slowly pushes it deeper inside you and pumps it slowly.

“dawit… it feels good,” he takes it as his go signal to insert his middle finger.

his fingers start picking up its pace. you whine out his name in pleasure. his lips find its way back to yours, swallowing your moans while his fingers do the work down there. you almost cum when you felt him curl his fingers inside you, clenching around his fingers.

“dawit, i’m getting close.” you cry out. you were so wet that your juices started dripping down to the sheets.

“fuck, babe, don’t come yet. do it when i’m inside you.” he pulls out his fingers, leaving you to whine in disappointment.

he hurries to reach for a condom and wraps his shaft with it. he gives his cock a few pumps and rubs the tip of his cock at your entrance before slowly pushing it inside. you wince at the pain as he cautiously pushes all of it inside. he’s finally buried deep in you.

“sorry if this hurts. i’ll start moving if you say so.” his eyes focus on you, making sure that you’re okay. he grunts as he feels you clench tightly around his member, trying to be familiar with the feeling.

“move.” he only stares at you. you give him a reassuring smile. “yes, i’m sure i’m fine.”

“tell me to stop if it hurts.” he says before leaning down to kiss you while he thrusts his cock in a slow pace.

it hurts in his first pushes, but once your insides have been stretched enough, the pleasure kicks in. dawit notices it when you start to moan more and you buckle your hips to meet his thrust.

“i’ll make you feel good.” he leaves a wet kiss in your cheek and you wrap your arms around him to push his body closer to you, the sweat of your bodies coming in contact. he intertwines your hands together on the side as he starts pushing in a normal pace.

soon enough the two of you are moaning in chorus as he thrusts in you faster and deeper. the sound of skin slapping mixed with your moans echoed the room. your nails dig his back, turning it red, when he hits a certain spot continuously. the knot in your stomach while he fingered you earlier came back, pushing you into the edge much further.

“dawit, i- i’m close… ah!” you let out a loud moan as your orgasm finally hit you.

“fuck, you’re so hot.”

the feeling of your juices around him turned him on more. his thrusts become sloppy and he breathes heavily as he tries to reach his high. he whines out your name with a final deep thrust, his cum filling the condom. he takes his cock out of you and removes the condom, tying the the condom and throwing it on the trash bin beside the bed.

you are sprawled out on the bed, still relishing the moment of ecstasy. dawit uses all of his energy left to stand up and reach for the tissues in the bathroom to clean you and himself. your half-lidded eyes stare at him lovingly. he never forgets to take care of you even in this kind of moment.

“cuddle with me before we shower.” you slightly move to the other side of the bed, giving him space.

he grins at you. it’s kind of funny to him how you were a hot mess earlier and now you’re back to being his baby. he lies down again and he scoops you closer to him, making you lean on his chest.

“did i do great?”

you snort at his question. “of course, baby. i always love it if it’s from you.”

“i love you so much.” he hugs you tight and presses a kiss on your forehead. “can i confess something?”

“you want to do it again?”

“how did you know?”

“because i want it too.” you giggle and peck his lips. right there, he swears that he just fell in love with you again.

#epex smut #wish smut

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maniacwatchestheworld · 3 years

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The DA Y/N OC Hunger Games Part 4

Part 1 | Part 3 || Part 5 | Part 10 | Part 11

Sorry for not having gotten around to this for the last few days. There was really no reason for it. Lately my brain has just been a pile of useless, non-productive mush. So I just haven't gotten anything done at all these last few days... Which isn't good, I suppose, but that's just what happens sometimes when you have a bad brain. And a bad brain is indeed what I have. IN ANY CASE! That's not what you're here for! You're here for murder! Soooooooo...

Do you know what time it is? Showtime? Murder time! Time for round 4 baybee! Y'all ready for this? No? Well TOO BAD BUCKO! It's back to business for us! So here we are! The results of round 4!

In a fit of frenzy, Alice @chelseareferenced creeps up on ??? ( @youraverageauprocrastinator ) and kills them dead!

WOOF! What a way to start off the round amiright? Fresh off of getting her revenge and snapping Dark’s neck, Alice decides to keep the murder spree up by killing ??? (youraverageauprocrastinator) here! And what a shame too. They never did figure out how to feel about all of this... And now they never will. Because they're dead. Forever. RIP. u.u

Y/N ( @dormats-town ) wonders how far they could throw their pitchfork. Athena (Post-WKM) ( @withjust-a-bite ) just wants it to end already...

I suppose that Athena (Post-WKM) here is just watching Y/N “Abe Slayer” (dormats-town) figure out how to stabby stab people real good with their pointy. Very difficult job for the both of them, I'm sure. Athena, I just hope that for your sake that Roses here isn't using you for pitchfork throwing practice (as a target). So long as no one is trying to stabby stab you, I think that's a thing to be massively grateful for! Is there really any need to sulk around if that's the case...? (I mean yes, but shhhhhh!)

Daffodil ( @shattered-da ) feels sorry for Lillian ( @indic0lite ) and frees them from the trap.

Well isn’t that nice! After making some friends, Daffodil still finds time out of their busy, busy day to help Lillian out! Are they friends now? Maybe! I have no idea! At the very least Lillian probably owes Daffodil their life. So play nice you two! And don’t you both go off murdering each other! That would be very sad. Huh. A Daffodil and a Lilly... How quaint. (I have no idea if Lillian is alright with going by ‘Lilly’ or not, but I mean... Flower friends! ALL THE FLOWER FRIENDS! ... Please...?)

Y/N ( @purple-anxiety-blog ) tries to kill Seth ( @who-killed-the-da ), but Seth retaliates and kills her instead.

After hating this place and looking like she could snap at any second, Braidy decides that it’s finally time to take fate into her own hands and to start doing some murdering! ... Only to immediately fail and die at the hands of the bikini-clad, magical scepter-wielding Seth... I guess she was listening to me and my suggestions from last round... Hm... Sorry about that! My bad! I should probably not give suggestions on who or who not to kill ever again! (Still probably gonna do it anyway tho.)

Dee looks for someone dumb enough to believe them.

Dee, I don’t think that that’s possible. No one here is dumber than you after all! We both have the bad brain baybee! Not even the two idiots right below your action here are too dumb to fall for any tricks you may come up with!

William feels strong enough to handle anything. (Actor) Mark is only looking out for himself.

But Will! Can you handle the narcissistic bastard sitting right next to you who’s seeking to ruin your life!? History says... No. No you can not.

Wilford Warfstache can't wait to kill again...

Uh... Yeah. That makes too much sense for him, really. Sooooo... Uh... People better start running before Warfy decides to do a little more stabby stabbing! I mean, he just killed his temporal bud for having a higher kill count than him! And they were supposed to be friends! Who knows what he’d do to you!

Lillian ( @indic0lite ) is looking particularly erratic today.

I mean, after being trapped and almost dying... Yeah, that’s fair. That might cause a little mental (and physical) scarring. You know what? You deserve a break! So go ahead and take the rest of the day off, dear!

Gray ( @without-celine ) looks for their next victim...

Jesus Christ! You haven’t even killed anyone yet and yet you’re already clamoring to do some good ol' fashioned murder! Calm the fuck down in there, Damien! We should really stop him, shouldn't we?

Dylan ( @the-mirror-realm ) swooshes the air with their sword. Y/N ( @ask-the-mirror-da ) is being adorable as always. Rosie ( @lostanddrowned ) doesn't care much for this place.

I mean, why would you care about this place...? Who actually wants to be here, right? Don’t we all just want to leave...? Maybe all of this violence amounts to nothing and merely serves to reflect our own relentless desires for self-indulgence. After all, who would revel in violence and death like this? Especially the death of their own characters... NAH! I kid! I’m having a great time! And I know that many of you out there are having a great time too! This isn’t going to be over until it’s over! Besides, you don’t need to worry about anything when you can woosh woosh a sword everywhere! ... Or at least watch someone else woosh woosh their sword in the air! Woosh woosh is fun. Don't you deny!

Celine finds some leather scraps, just enough to patch together some rudimentary clothing. It looks rather caveman-like.

Okay... So Celine has decided to go all savage up in here... Fair enough. Valid way to spend your time. Besides, it’s not like she has a brother who would be embarrassed by or judge her for dressing up like that anymore!

In a fit of frenzy, Veridia ( @ask-the-femaleda ) creeps up on Athena (Post-WKM) ( @withjust-a-bite ) and slaughters her!

And Veridia’s snapping in round 1 finally pays off! Sorry to see you go, Athena. You made things very dicey for Lillian for a second there and could have been a genuinely terrifying contestant. Better luck next time for both of you! Maybe you should have stuck around Roses and their pitchfork...? At least then your death may have been less gory...? They may have done some stabby stabbing to protect you!

Seth ( @who-killed-the-da ) calls arcane fury down on Wilford Warfstache, their ancient scepter beaming with an inner rage. At first, it seems nothing happened, until a light breeze blows Wilford Warfstache away like a pile of old dust.

... Huh... That’s certainly an... Interesting way for Wilford to have gone out... Welp... I guess that Wilf is kinda terrifying forever and always, so it's better that someone dealt with him sooner rather than later (before he earned himself a higher body count)! And as a bonus, that’s one more terrifying sociopath out of the competition! Seth's been very busy lately, haven’t they? They’ve gone from having 1 kill to now having 3! In just one round! Thus usurping Damien’s spot at the top of the murder leaderboard (which he had been sharing with Alice since the start of this round) and claiming the seat for his own! Oh how the tides shift, amiright? And so the bikini-clad, meek cutie’s reign of terror goes on, I suppose!

And that’s round four! Seth is somehow proving to be a very formidable contestant! They do say that you should always be weary of the nice ones... >.> Though there are plenty of tough competitors still out here! Who knows what can/will be happening next? Who lives? Who dies? Who goes on to share these stories? To find out, tune in next time for the next round of the DA Y/N OC Hunger Games!

#DA Y/N battle royale #hunger games simulator

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imagine-bleach · 4 years

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Love this blog so much! Can I have a scenario where Grimmjow is having sex with his curve/plus size female s/o for the first time! Thanks ❤️❤️

It was another peaceful night as you layed stomach first on your bed. You hummed slightly flipping through a book you have been meaning to finish for months now. The night is still and warm, your window open to let in a natural breeze.

Grimmjow stares at your carefree form while he creeps silently into your room through your open window. He doesn’t understand how humans are never on guard, if he was anyone else he could have easily killed you. His eyes scan your backside as he takes in your form. You were big everywhere,from big tits, big thigs,to a nice juicy ass too match, but Grimmjow didn’t mind that. Maybe that is what drew him in more to you. After saving your life from a hollow, Grimmjow found himself thinking about you, more and more, so he sought after you.

You felt someone sit on your bed at you let out a gasp before sitting up and seeing Grimmjow scowl across his face.

“Geez Grimmjow, you can’t take the front door!? You almost gave me a heart attack!” You yelled at him, Grimmjow rolls his eyes before standing up from the bed, “It’s too easy to sneak in your room, you didn’t feel my reiatsu?” He said, disregarding your comments.

“Unlike many people you know Grimmjow I don’t have great reiatsu reader or whatever you call it, and I don’t have to worry about my friends going through the window to come visit me.” You replied, going back to your book. “Anyway, why are you here, I thought you were doing something for Mr. Urahara.” You said. You hear Grimmjow smack his teeth as he snatches the book out of your hand.

“Well I finished early and I thought I should visit my woman, what’s wrong with that?” He says, his words burning into you. His woman.

You and Grimmjow never really put a title to what you have, you knew it had to be more than friends, you two did kiss, made out and cuddle and sometimes you would give him an occasional hand job, but the he has never seen you completely naked.

“Your woman? I don’t remember being your woman,” you say. Grimmjow gives you an unreadable look before he throws the book you were reading on your desk and walks back to your bed. His intense gaze never leaving you, like he was stalking his prey as he slowly sinks himself back onto your bed. You feel your body heat up at his unnerving stare.

“Yeah, my woman, I have marked you on your neck, so you are mine” he says again.

“That’s not how things work with humans ____, usually you ask someone to be your partner” you tell him.

“I don’t care.” Grimmjow says, moving closer to your face, “You are my woman, if I have to mark you hundred times so every knows, I will.” He says. You glup, making Grimmjow smile, “Maybe I’ll have to show you...” he says, his lips brushing against yours.

You didn’t have time to ask what did Grimmjow mean by that before his tongue licks your bottom lip, making you gasp. Grimmjow takes advantage and moves in to kiss you. You feel his tongue invade your mouth, you learned quickly through other encounters that Grimmjow is a good kisser and how dominate he is. He moves his mouth from your mouth to your ear, his tongue slowly traveling to your neck as he bites on your soft skin.

You hiss quietly, hands tangled in his hair. Grimmjow takes one of his hands and rubs it slowly on your thigh, you squirm a little but play it off. You feel him move from your thighs to plam your heat through your shorts. You sigh and feel the tension building up.

You stiffen when you feel Grimmjow hand travel near your stomach. You try to shake it off but the feeling does not go away. Grimmjow notice immediately and open his eyes and saw how hard your eyes were shut. He stops kissing you, making you open your eyes. “What? You can keep going Grimmjow.” You say, rubbing his arm.

“Why are you so nervous? This isn’t your first time is it?” Grimmjow questioned. You blinked, about to dismiss his comments when he spoke again, “Don’t you dare lie to me ____, what is wrong with you?”

You chewed on your bottom lip before speaking “No it’s not that, I don’t want things to change between us Grimmjow... I don’t want you to look at me different when you see everything on me..” you said, opening up your emotions. Most of the time you were comfortable in your own skin, but with Grimmjow the little insecurities would buzz in your ear.

There is a brief moment of silence, Grimmjow slow blinks and intense stare burning holes in your face. He then scoffs.

“You are thinking too much ____, I’m doing this for a reason, if I didn’t want you, you would know,so calm the fuck down.” Grimmjow says harshly. His lips quickly attached themselves to yours to give you a fierce kiss, lips, tongue and teeth, you even feel his Mask press slightly against your face. When he draws back you are panting, making Grimmjow laugh insanely.

“You are so fucking sexy...” Grimmjow says, you feel your face heat up from Grimmjow confessions, you felt his hand squeeze your ample covered breasts. “Really?” You said breathless as his hand travel down your stomach reaching for the ends of your shirt.

“I wouldn’t lie about something like this ___. Here, feel how hard you made me,” he says. He spreads your legs apart and crawls between them, his hard clothed dick pressing against you. “You did this to me ______, I hope you are ready for this. He says, lifting your shirt over your head.

Grimmjow stares down at your bare chest, a dark smile spreads across his face as he roughly pinches your left nipple. You winced out of pain and pleasure which makes Grimmjow laugh breathlessly. “ I knew you were hiding some nice tits under those clothes..” he says pinching harder and taking his other hand and slapping your right breast.

You whimpered again, but still found yourself liking it the roughness that his calloused hands were giving you. Grimmjow then takes a harden bud and sucks on it, making you arch your back clean off the bed. He looks at you, his blue eyes piercing you, like he was going to remember every single face you were making.

Grimmjow stops the assault on your breast, he sits back and looks at his handy work, bite marks lingering your neck with small bruises on your soft mounds. You feel his hands reach for your shorts, you bite your lip and lifted your legs so he could slide them off faster along with your panties. Grimmjow places one hand on your right knee to get your leg open. He stares down at heat, you resent the urge to cover up, offering Grimmjow a crooked smile in return.

As if he was reading your mind, Grimmjow quickly opens his mouth,“Pretty little pussy.” Grimmjow comments as he takes his middle finger, sliding it down your wet slit. “And wet...” he says, a small laugh escaping his lips. He spreads your legs wider, nails digging into the softness on your knees, you wince, not knowing if you were doing so because of the pleasure or the pain. He takes his middle and index finger and slowly rubs your clit, making you buck a little, you hear him snicker to himself, before his fingers slowly find themselves inside you. Grimmjow grunts as he moves his fingers in a incredibly slow speed. “You literally sucked in my fingers ____, how dirty of you,” he says, making you shake your head in disagreement.

“You want more than my fingers _____, don’t worry baby, I’m going to give you exactly what you want.” Grimmjow says. He gives you a sadistic smile, climbing off the bed to remove his clothes. You watch him as he removes his shirt, scar and Hollow Hole in view, followed by his pants, noticeably mint green hair and his hard cock oozing with his precum.

“Get on your knees.” he tells you. You do as you were told, ass in the air with your backed arched. You feel his hands on your hips as he brings himself closer to you.

“You ready baby...” Grimmjow says, lining himself and rubbing the head of his dick across your dripping cunt, lubing himself with your sweet nectar and his precum.

You wiggly your ass a little, you hear Grimmjow snicker before giving a slap to your ass, “Wiggling your ass like a cat in heat...” Grimmjow laughs. You felt his head gentle penetrate you before he easily slides in due to your wetness. You let out a small whine when Grimmjow entire length stuffs perfectly inside you. The pain is there, but it was more out of discomfort.

Your throat feels dry, as you open your mouth to talk, wondering when was the last time you actually spoke, “Grimmjow... it’s too much” you say, but Grimmjow smiles at your discomfort, “It’s because you’re so fucking tight ____.” Grimmjow gives you an experimental thrust making you cry out, you have no time to brace yourself before Grimmjow is rocking roughly against you.

Grimmjow fucks you animalistic and like he was never going to see you again. Your previous sex partners not even competing on what Grimmjow was giving you. They would treat you so kind, almost like you were going to break in half. The way Grimmjow was fucking you was like he knew you could handle it. His hands would switch between your hips, tits, ass, or pulling your hair. You don’t have time to react much, hell even breath, you only focused on the attack he was giving to your body. You moan loudly when he slaps your ass more times than you can count, Grimmjow grunts and then let’s out a breathlessly laugh.

“You like being hurt don’t you.... you look soft and sweet but deep down you like being fucked so hard, with a body like this you need someone to fuck you until you can’t breath...” Grimmjow hisses as he digs his nail deeper into the softness of your hips. You let out another moan as his thrusts becomes impossibly deep, kissing the entrance of your womb. You somehow managed to meet his thrusts with your own, making Grimmjow release a growl. You feel Grimmjow hard chest on your back as he takes one of his hands and puts it on your clit, rubbing circles. You let out a string of moans, your own thrusts slowly down with the building pleasure. Grimmjow breath near your ear.

“Tell me you love it ____” Grimmjow says in your ear, his thrusts becoming more erratic, you moan more, licking lips before speaking “I love it Grimmjow...” you say.

Your legs start to shake, symboling that your orgasm was close. His hand that was rubbing you to pure bliss moving faster and faster reaching you to the peak. You moan too loudly for your own liking as your orgams came, your walls clenching around Grimmjow. He snarls as he grabs a fistful of yours hair and forces your head down into the sheets. Grimmjow gives out several hard thrusts as he releases thick sticky come into you. He takes a moment before he pulls out of your abused heat, warm sperm slowly running down the inside of your thighs.

“Fucking hell _____, I didn’t expect for you to clench my dick like that.” Grimmjow says. The rest of your body slumps on the bed, you flip over til you were on your back, looking and Grimmjow as he lets out a deep laugh. Grimmjow slides next to you, resting his head on his hand. Grimmjow looks at you with a tender look on his face, “I’m not good with shit like this, but you are ok? I didn’t hurt you badly?” He says

You give Grimmjow a goofy look, “Not the big bad Cat growing soft...” you said, earning an annoyed look from the sexta Espada.

“Whatever, you caught me off guard, I was planning on fucking you all night” he says, you laugh at his plan, it sounding ridiculous but you somehow knew he was not lying.

“Maybe next time Grimmjow, you kinda wore me out, I need a bathe.” You said, sitting up on the bed, but feeling Grimmjow warm hand stop you.

“You can’t wait for a second? My scent will wash off of you if you take a bathe now” he says, pulling you closer to his arms.

You hold back a laugh, knowing this wasn’t the real reason why he wanted you to stay in the bed with him.

“Ok Grimmjow, only for a few minutes, then we take a shower afterwards.” You say. You hear Grimmjow grunt before he wraps his arms and legs around you, burying his face into your hair.

“Next time I’m going to cum all over you, then my scent will really be on you.” Grimmjow says.

“Way to kill the mood Grimmjow...”

#grimmjow jaegarjaquez #grimmjow jaegerjaquez #anonymous #GRIMMJOW A FREAK!!!!#a long overdue sceanrio #havent wrote one in a minute

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riotfuckery · 4 years

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I’ll always love you

A/N: Hello beautiful readers! It’s your friendly neighborhood big tiddy goth gf and lowkey weeb here! Today we have my first request from non other then fellow Sero stan and writing senpai @thedreadthread 💖 Thank you for the request and I hope you like it! Y’all really like angst so here we have some angst/comfort to add to my collection! Thank you to my senpais and readers who showed me so much love on my last Sero fic. I hope I can deliver! I’m also working on Shattered hearts and clean shirts pt2 so keep an eye out for that!

Senpai taglist: @trafalgar-temptress @queensynderella @kingtamakimurder @birds-have-teeth Thank you for the support 💖🥺💖Sending lots of love and good vibes to all of you💖💖💖

The romantic tension between Sero and yourself was so thick you could cut it with a knife. The quick glances you shared in class and during training was almost painful to the other teens in your vicinity. You were pining after each other PAINFULLY. But neither of you had the guts to admit it to another.

You were both blind to the others affections and love though. You were the sweetest girl in class 1-A, with a strong quirk and an even greater sense of humor. How could he not fall for you? You were easily the cutest girl in the class, with kind (e/c) eyes and a laugh that made his heart go into overdrive. You were kind and sweet to everyone, even that blonde time bomb that goes by the name of Bakugo. You even had a little patience with that nasty grape rat. He was stunned by your capacity to be sweet.

He was convinced that you didn’t like him, he told himself that he was nothing special only with a plain quirk and plain face. But you couldn’t have disagreed more. His deep onyx eyes soothed you and held so much emotion that you could stare at them for an eternity. The elbows that he hated added to him being so unique. His quirk being useful in hero work and rescue. He was handsome too, his sharp jawline and high cheekbones had you blushing. He wasn’t handsome in a princely way that many girls dreamed of, but in a real life way that made your heart stutter and had your palms sweating a bit.

You were good friends with everyone in the class, but you found your home with the bakusquad. Mostly because that’s where your crush resided most of the time. You loved the squad obviously, Mina being your new sister, Denki being your friend that encouraged your own chaotic behavior, and you even trained with Katsuki a few days out of the week. The love you had for Hanta was different though.

His love started for you when you were just good friends. He heard your laugh from across the classroom one morning and thought it was the most magical sound in the world. The insane cackle that came from your mouth made him break out into a wide grin while his eyes followed where the sound was coming from. He followed it to you. Your eyes scrunched up and your cute cheeks tinted pink from how lard you were laughing. He fell in love at first sight and from then on he made it his job to make you laugh.

It started with sly comments about his other classmates. “I know they call him an angry pomeranian, but the muzzle really seals the deal doesn’t it?” He said casually said to you as the sports festival awarding ceremony was happening. You had bite your lip to keep yourself quiet before you burst out into laughter. He heard the quiet giggles that escaped and he smiled brightly at the sound.

He then started to tell you jokes because the sound of your laughter made his day so much brighter. First it started as a group thing, just telling jokes to the whole squad. Mina had brought you to the group first because the two of you got along so well. He was more than happy to have you there.

“Did you hear about the two psychiatrists who passed each other on a walk? One said to the other, ‘You’re fine, how am I?’” The dark hair boy said amusingly. You laughed, the sound zeroing on his ears among the other squads laughter. The light blush on your face showed up as your eyes crinkled. He blushed himself as he was laughing but didn’t try to rid of it.

Weeks of laughing at his jokes continued and you found yourself gravitating toward the tape master, not just for a laugh but because you thought he was a great person. You hung out in each other’s rooms, watching bad horror movies and laughing at dumb people. Even tutoring him regularly when it came to English.

He was great company to you and you found yourself thinking about him more often. Like how handsome his face was as you took quick glances at him during class or how he was such a good sport even when you both were studying together. Yeah he wasn’t the most book smart but he definitely knew how to light up a room and make everything feel less exhausting.

The sleeping beast called a crush didn’t wake up and thrash around the cage of your heart until you were sparring with him during class. You had a strong quirk called Angel, with the stereotypical small white angel wings that grew exponentially before flying around and using gold light beams from your hands to shoot at opponents. The sword and shield seemingly tattooed on your forearm could be pulled out and used during closer combat.

As soon as Aizawa called the start of the match, you were wrapped up in his tape as he pulled you closer to him. The smug smirk on his face was present as he leaned so close you noses were touching. His voice dropped a few octaves before he spoke as he locked eyes with you. His heart was racing just being so close to you, he wondered what else what he would do while you’re tied up by him.

“C’mon angel, you know you’ve always wanted to be tied up by my tape. So why don’t you be a good girl and let me take the win, yeah?” His dirty thoughts broke through a bit. He glanced at your lips briefly. A blush clawed it way on your face as you growled. You focused the heat in your body into light as he spoke, ignoring your own racing heart and clearing your mind.

You released this energy as soon as he finished. Your body flashing a bright gold as you melted the tape around you. He was stunned for a moment because of the flash and you took that moment to pull out your sword as a precautionary before you could knock him out of bounds with a swift kick to the chest. He groaned as soon as he hit the pavement. He was winded from the kick and trying to get his breathing under control.

You released a breath you didn’t know you were holding. The sleeping beast now wildly thrashing the cage of your heart and flipping everything upside down. The heat on your face was so hot that you thought you would melt the handle of your sword you were gripping tightly. Your brain was fuzzy and your blood was boiling in a different way. His words drove you mad and he knew it. Aizawa’s smooth voice shook you out of your daze.

“Good job (L/N), but make sure not to get distracted by petty words alright?” Aizawa spoke lazily as he wrote down notes on the fight. He walked over to Sero who was still on the ground and reached a hand out to help him stand up. (We love dadzawa on this blog)

Sero took it and tuned out his teacher as he focused on you. You stood with Mina, who was wildly flailing around and yelling at you to do something. You still had on the bright pink blush on your face but now it crept up to your ears. He smirked at the fact as the teacher walked away and called the next match, too tired to deal with this bull. (Bruh same)

The next few days were normal with Sero except a blush that seemed permanent on your cute face. Of course he noticed, he was walking around his a smug smirk that rivaled Bakugou’s but a lot less noticeable. You two were glancing at each other more and more in class and locking eyes a few times. Neither of you said anything about it.

You couldn’t find the courage to confess to Hanta. Mina was pushing both of you to confess to each other. Her and Denki even tried to lock you two in a room together but were ultimately disappointed when nothing happened and you both brushed it off. Her lil romantic heart was screaming in frustration because nothing was happening even though it was so OBVIOUS.

You were walking home from school after being locked in the room with the handsome boy. You walked with Sero until you went your separate ways about halfway through, both of you laughing at each other’s jokes and full of smiles. You both said your goodbyes and went your ways. You smiled at the time you had alone with him as you pulled out your phone and ear buds.

Your (fav band) was playing into the small speakers as you walked home. It was a little later than normal so you tried to make your way home faster. You passed by an alley on your way home. The one you passed by everyday. No big deal right?

An arm suddenly shot out of the dark alley as it wrapped around your waist and a hand covered your mouth. Your back was to their chest as you felt the dread creeping in. A hot breath was next to your ear as they spoke. “Ohhhh an angel, I’ve always wanted to kill a cute angel like you” a raspy and slurred voice breathed.

You tried to make your wings grow and your body heat up to get this gross weirdo to let you go. The fear kicking in as you struggled against the man. His boozed soaked stench of his mouth making you inwardly shiver in disgust. Your heart was beating wildly in pure terror of what could happen next. You needed to get out of here or die while trying.

“You can try and burn me all you want angel but I’m fireproof” the man slurred as the hand that held your mouth turned into sharp claws, scratching deep cuts on your cheek. Tears stung your eyes as you tried not to whimper. The blood from your cheek getting all over his fingers and all over your school uniform.

You struggled against him once again. The arm that was around your thin waist was held in front of you and was now on fire. Your stopped struggling to focus your energy into light to blind him. He chuckled at your stillness thinking you gave in. You were terrified but you kept yourself from giving in.

“Keep still angel, and I won’t have to burn those pretty wings of yours.” He taunted. Your eyebrows furrowed in disgust as you concentrated once again. You put most of your energy into making light as he took a deep sniff of your hair. You wanted to hurl but you concentrated.

You released all your energy at once, blasting the creep back with bright gold light as you ran out of the alleyway and into the nearest establishment. Soon you felt the searing hot pain of your right wing, you let out a loud scream as you ran. You pressed your hand into your cheek to try to stop the bleeding. The tears on your face flowing out and stinging your gashes. You ran as far away from the alley as you could until you found a cafe.

In your haze you ran right into someone. The blood on your hand and cheek smearing all over their black sweater. The adrenaline kept you standing as your heart raced. You looked up and looked to see none other than Mr. Aizawa looking at you in pure shock. You felt the adrenaline wear off as the pain set in. You let out a pained gasp as you were looking up at him. “Please help me” your small and panicked voice managed to get out as you passed out.

He was shocked to say the least but he caught you by your unoccupied arm and carried you princess style to his car. He sped off to the hospital, definitely breaking a few laws. He kept a clean handkerchief pressed to your cheek as he drove, you were still bleeding. The smell of singed feathers and skin filled his nose as he sped to the nearest clinic.

He got you checked in as he talked to police. He was also the one who made the call to your parents. They were out of the country so they gave him permission to take care of you. Once he ended the call with your parents, he leaned back into the chair and rubbed his dry eyes. He felt so tired, even more tired than usual. But it wasn’t your fault that you got attacked.

Mr. Aizawa liked you. You were a good student and kind to all the teachers. Not too loud and always turning in your homework on time. You even politely asked questions when you did have them. He didn’t play favorites but compared to the rest of the class you were well, an angel. He was worried about you of course! You were a sweet girl, a good student, and a good sport.

He sighed at the thought of telling his class that you were in the hospital. ‘That headache will be for another day’ he thought as he stretched out his always tired muscles. Thanking the receptionists after he got all the paperwork filled out, the tired man went to wait in your room to tell you the news.The cuts would scar and your wing might be okay, the doctor said. He sat down in the padded chair next to your cot, leaning his elbows on his knees and holding his hands together while he looked at you pitifully.

You were now dressed in a hospital gown, a wad of gauze was secured on your cheek as you lay your side facing him. Your right wing 3/4ths of the way is burnt but was now wrapped in bandages. He thanked whatever higher power whoever did this didn’t get the base of your wings. But he still felt terrible for you. The small squeak of terror pleading for help was gonna haunt him in his dreams for the next few weeks. He felt guilty even though this was in no way his fault.

Your stirring broke him out his thoughts. He smiled comfortingly at you. “Hey kiddo” he spoke with his signature deep and lazy tone.

“Dad? I thought you were out of the country?” You spoke still in your sleepy haze induced by painkillers. The ravenette’s eyes widened and he stiffened for a split second. He then let out a small huff and leaned back in his chair and smiled genuinely at you. He knew a lot of his students saw him as their dad but hearing it made him happy.

“Sorry kiddo, it’s your homeroom teacher.” He put on a neutral face as he tried to hide the smug tone in his smooth voice. Your eyes widened at his words and and you shot up into a sitting position on your bed. A small hiss escaped your mouth from moving too quickly.

“Sensei! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to! I uhh” you panicked. He gave you a small wave to dismiss it and you shut your mouth as to not embarrass yourself any further. You always did see him like a dad, always helping you gently along and pushing you to do better. He was always supportive of all your classmates and you all joked about calling him dad in private.

He took a deep breath and asked you what happened. You told him about walking home a little later cause you forgot something in the classroom. You lied about being late cause you couldn’t get Mina and Denki in trouble. They didn’t mean for this to happen and they didn’t cause you to be injured. But you told him about everything else truthfully.

He sighed in frustration when you finished. “Well you did what you could and I’m proud of you for getting away. Just have someone walk you home when it gets late, okay? Ask one of the teachers or classmates, I’m sure they’ll say yes.” his neutral tone was back. You nodded at him, still embarrassed from calling him dad earlier.

The tall man stood up from the chair and gave your hair a light ruffle before he made his way to the door. “I’ll see you soon kid, get better soon.” He spoke as he left the room. You gave him a shy smile and a small wave goodbye. You laid back on your side as soon as he shut the door. The painkillers and the reassurance from your teacher made you feel at ease. You closed your eyes and drifted into dreamland.

A whole day later, you awoke to the sound of familiar yelling at the door of your room along with the stressed voice of the nurse. “WE’RE HER FRIENDS! LET US SEE HER YOU HAG!” The all too familiar voice of Bakugo Katsuki yelled.

“Sir please be quiet! She’s sleeping! You’ll wake her up!” The nurse quietly yelled back. You rolled your eyes and gave a laugh plus a wince coming from your cheek from said laughter. “COME IN, IM AWAKE NOW!” You yelled with a smile and another wince.

The door nearly was kicked down by an angry but worried Katsuki. Eiji and Mina rushing through the door to attack you in hugs that were a little too tight. Kiri was hooked with two arms around your waist while kneeling on the floor and Mina hugged you around the neck. Denki was crying and apologizing the right side of the bed. You smiled and laughed at the two love bugs while softly rubbing their backs, giving the electric blonde a “it’s okay, pikachu, I’m alive aren’t I?” with a small laugh.

Their cries of joy of you being okay were echoing around the room as you locked eyes with Sero. A small blush of embarrassment creeped onto your face as you looked at each other. Bakugo plopped down on the same chair Aizawa was sitting on hours earlier with huff. You smiled softly at Sero and he immediately smiled back.

He called off the group lovebugs and sat down on a chair on the other side of you. You spent the next few hours updating them with what happened and calming down the squads overdramatic reactions with the help of the Sero. One by one they all left as it was getting late. Soon enough is was just you and Sero.

As you said both said goodbye to Kiri, a comfortable silence filled the air. You took a deep breath and a good look at him. He face read as worried yet relieved to know that you were okay. You softly grabbed his large warm hand and in a moment of rare boldness, you interlaced your fingers together.

“Thank you for coming Hanta, I really appreciate it. It wouldn’t be the same without you visiting. You always seem to make me feel better no matter what I’m going through.” You spoke softly as you looked at your interwoven hands. The painkillers making you forget your nervousness around him.

He full body blushed at the comment, clearing his throat to try and form a response. His heart thumped against his ribcage painfully at the good news. He was overjoyed that he meant something to you. Little did he know, he meant the world to you.

“Of course, anything for you. You make my day so much brighter so I missed you a lot when you weren’t at school.” He spoke nervously. It was your turn to blush now. The heat crept up to your cheeks and clawed its way up to your ears. He couldn’t help but think you look absolutely adorable, even all bandaged up. His pupils expanded in the dark sea of his eyes for the love he harbored for you.

“Awe, thank you Hanta. You’re really sweet, ya know that? Now only if I could find a guy like you to love a broken angel like me.” You spoke with a sad laugh. The haze of the painkillers and the gashes that ran from the top of your cheekbone and stopped at the corner of your lips hit you with a tidal wave of realization.

You were a broken angel. The gashes were just an ugly reminder of what being an angel quirk user was really like. The fear of getting slaughtered and strung up like a trophy on a daily basis. The predatory looks you got from men when you were just minding your business. The fear of never using your wings again. You gripped his hand tightly as you wiped away the tears that were now clouding your vision. When did you start crying?

The reality of the situation crashing into him hard. It hit him like a train. How did you feel about all this? The guilt set in on not asking sooner but he knew you wouldn’t want to cry in front of everyone. He decided to do what no one else really did and he comforted you. His overwhelmed brain made his mouth say the thing he normally wouldn’t dare to.

“I’ll always love you, broken or not.” He spoke softly. Your eyes snapped to each other in shock as you both squeezed the others hand so tightly you thought it would shatter. The blushes on both your faces blossoming from pink to red. You broke the awkward tension first with a soft smile plastered on your face.

“Thank you, Hanta. I’ll always love you too.” You spoke gently as you placed a small kiss on the hand that was holding yours. You smiled lovingly at each other even though you both just confessed your love in a hospital. The air in the room felt lighter and warmer, like things were starting anew. It was a small step, but it was a step. And that’s all that matters.

#request fic #sero hanta x reader #sero x reader #sero fluff #sero stans unite #mha fluff #mha fanfiction #bhna imagine #bhna fanfiction #angst #fluff #bhna fluff #comfort fic #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bakusqaud #bhna x reader #mha x reader

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kuriquinn · 4 years

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Dear Mr. Kuri, thank you so much for your recent post concerning the young artist who was effectively censored from sharing his/her/their art on a particular subject (just... so sad). I was hoping to get your thoughts on how adults might navigate interactions with minors in this space. Specifically, extending our support for their work w/out necessarily... engaging with them. I know this sounds crazy stupid but before tumblr I wasn't really active on any social media and I had no idea (cont'd)

there were so many users under the age of 16 on this site. I've even come to learn that some identified users I had interacted with early on were as young as 13, and as someone in my 30's - tbh that scared the shit out of me. I totally agree that someone that young and impressionable would be crushed by the kind of criticism that poor artist faced, and would likely never create or share again... to their detriment. The thing is though, I feel really hesitant following any creator (cont'd)

that isn't 18 or older... What are your thoughts on following/reblogging/interacting with minors in fandom? I fully agree that they need support, especially from older users who don't care what some stranger on the internet has to say... but I just feel... like I don't know how to go about that the right way. I really REALLY don't want minors on my blog at all... sorry to bother you with this, just wondering how you'd suggest handling this. I didn't comment on the post bc I didn't (cont'd)

want to risk that young artist reading my inquiry and feeling even more alienated. As always, thank you for your time and insight. - Birk

I may go a bit off-topic here, but let me give this a try:

I think in, In the end, it all comes down to communication and mutual respect.

Adults have this pervading mentality that until a child hits 18, they need to be infantilized and sheltered, but once they pass that magical number, then it’s a free for all. So, for eighteen years, it’s all about sticking a Potemkin village in front of any idea, person or situation that a child might find uncomfortable (read: they don’t like the feelings it gives them; very different from actual harmful ideas/persons/situations). Then, these sheltered almost-adults enter public spaces and expect society to keep doing that…when it turns out that’s not how it works, they become toxic.

This is how poisonous movements like purity-culture develop online, or new fans who demonize older fans and adults as being perverts for enjoying the very same pastimes they have.

For those of us interacting with these people, the automatic reaction is to “cancel” that person, thereby alienating and isolating them even more in their bad behavior. Instead of taking the time to talk with and try to show them through actions that the world isn’t limited to what they know.

As adults in fandom, we know that a large majority of the fandom is younger, because we were them once. We were that 12-year-old discovering fanfiction existed or sharing drawings we made of our original Harry Potter characters or quoting our favorite movies and televisions ad infinite. We got shit for it in real life, so we had to create spaces of our own online.

We, in effect, built fandom so that it would be more welcoming for the generations that came after us. And while a lot of us stick to that unwritten knowledge, as the years pass, a lot more become gatekeepers. They set a standard of what a fan must know or do to be considered a “real” fan, and they’re mean about how they do that.

Is it any wonder that new fans coming in experience this behavior and then jump on the “adults in fandom is creepy” bandwagon?

These new fans coming in, especially tweens and teens, they still live in this false reality where they only get to enjoy themselves and be kids for a limited amount of time, and once they Become Adult they have to give it all up—and can’t figure out why all those old creeps online are still a part of such “childish” things.

That fault lies squarely on our society, which pushes kids from a young age to be thinking of what they want to do when they grow up so they can get out there and start producing, producing, producing for the state and becoming a “useful” member of society.

We as fandom veterans, need to do our best to teach them differently, and that comes right back to my point: communication and mutual respect.

Older fans need to respect newcomers, as much as the new baby fans need to learn to respect their fandom elders. There is no maximum age for fandom; there’s no minimum age, either, although the younger the fan, the more their parents should be keeping an eye out for the truly damaging stuff and teaching their kids how to avoid that stuff on their own.

Now, obviously, people don’t always announce online how old they are (though it does happen more frequently now than when I started writing), but regardless, there should be a certain etiquette to it.

When you interact with someone online, you don’t know if they are 15 or 50. And the way you interact with them shouldn’t change based on knowing their age. We should maintain the same level of respect for the new fans as the older fans.

So, as to how adults might navigate interactions with minors (especially when you know they’re minors)?

Treat them as any other intelligent human being: with respect.

Because how else are they going to learn?

My mom always used to say to us, “I’m not raising children, I’m raising adults,” which basically meant she was teaching us how to be adults. Kids don’t pop out of the womb magically knowing how to interact with the world, they take their cues from the adults that are already there.

Fandom babies learn how to be active participants in fandom from the people who are already there. And they’re more likely to listen to and look up to someone that treats them as a mature and capable being, than someone who dismisses them as too young or too green, or dismisses their knowledge and experience because they haven’t earned their metaphorical stripes.

Remember, a lot of these kids are coming to fandom because they need an outlet. In this age of helicopter parents, this is the only place where they get to be treated as an individual adult-in-the-making instead of the overly protected child or student that must be shielded from the world. A lot of them are trying to figure out how to deal with the horrors that happen to them or around them every day. That 16-year-old girl writing a rape/non-con fic under a pseudonym? She could be exorcising her own demons through the only way she has because no one in her life is listening to her. That 14-year-old writing about homelessness might know more about it than someone twice his age.

Expertise and experience knows no age, and as adults, we need to not fall into the trap of thinking it does. There are some kids out there that have seen and endured more than I can even imagine.

In recent years, there’s been this trend of treating kids like sexless beings until we, the adults, deem them capable of having a sense of sexuality. When the reality is, once kids start puberty, they’re developing that sexuality, and are trying to figure out what it means to them and how to navigate it, and the world. It doesn’t matter if adults are uncomfortable with it, this is what our human biology has decided for us.

And chances are, as much as adults try to curate the world and keep kids from seeing the darker, less safe stuff? They’re already doing it. I saw this when I was teaching, the kids are already accessing and interacting with stuff like sex, drugs, relationships… Whenever a faceless censor tries to block that sort of thing, they find a way around it. Humans are funny like that—we want the things that are kept away from us, whether harmful or not.

It’s our responsibility to help them think critically about what they’re seeing, and teach them to express themselves about it in a respectful manner.

So by all means: follow that amazing artist even if they are only 15. Their age doesn’t negate the fact that they have talent that needs to be nurtured and encouraged. Reblog the images and the fics that strike you, even if you find out the person writing it isn’t 18 yet. Send a shoutout via DM or review or comment to someone that you admire whether you know they’re age or not.

Unless you’re being actively creepy and offensive (and seriously, don’t do that, it’s gross whether the recipient is a minor or not), chances are these creators are desperate for some assurance that the medium they choose to express themselves in is having an effect on people—and that they have the power to make even adults sit up and listen.

So…TL;DR:

When interacting with younger fans, do so with respect. And if they say something problematic, don’t automatically cancel them and write them off as “obviously too young and immature to understand”. They understand more than you think and will seek out their interests whether adults think it’s appropriate or not. That’s how freedom works. But if we’re going to nip bad behavior like purity culture and agism in the bud, we need to start by treating minors in fandom as adults developing their worldview, not as infants to be sheltered.

#longpost #asks #fandom #content creators #content consumers #reading #writing #online etiquette

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moonjjks · 6 years

Photo

hello hello, it’s your local starry jungkook enthusiast, here with my very first follow forever~

Thank you so incredibly much to every single person who follows me!! You guys are the absolute sweetest and always brighten up my day! Bangtan has honestly really changed my life in the most positive way, and I don’t know where I would be without them. I made this blog during a really hard time in my life, and to think that it’s already been a year is so wild to me. At the same time I can’t believe it’s only been a year and I’ve already gotten to see them three times. Life is hard, but bts has helped me find ways to find joy in the little things. This blog has been a blessing in disguise from the day I started it, and it continues to be a place of love and support, and I sincerely cannot thank you all enough! 💕

To be honest I have no business making this still, but I hit a follower milestone that I never expected to ever reach on this sideblog, and the one year anniversary of this blog is coming up! (That, and I already made that cute lil header so I had to use it) So in celebration, here are some of the wonderful blogs that I follow!

mutuals are bolded

♡ - i love you with my whole entire heart

✨ - go to the bottom for a sappy lil note

# - i

j - m

n - z

✨ Mutual Loving Time ✨

bee: my carpe my diem 😘 my very best friend and my darling girlfriend. Part of me wonders how we would have happened had we not discovered bts, but tbh I’m glad that I never have to find out, because both bts and you have vastly improved my life in the past year alone, and I think our beginning is perfect just the way it is. You have the world’s biggest heart, and you continuously put me and my needs above your own. I've been so broken for so long, but you handle me with the utmost care. You’re so gentle with me, and my healing has been slow but every day I heal a little more thanks to you. You’re the very cutest and you make me smile every day. thank you for showing me all of the love i never knew i deserved. 💕💜💕

sav: SAV!!!! It’s been ages since we’ve talked (highkey because I’m the worst and I’m so sorry I’m so terrible with communication), but you were the very first friend I ever made on this blog, and I’ll always have immense love for you! I’m always creeping and wishing you the very best in the world. I love and miss you!! 💕

lea: you are just the brightest person in the whole wide world, you shine so radiantly and you lift up everyone around you!! You are genuinely one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met and I absolutely adore you. You’re always checking in on me and offering comfort and I suck at keeping in touch with people but please know I am also always here for you!! I love you, thank you so much for being you!! 💕

sara: miss sara!!! we’ve both been so busy lately that we haven’t gotten a chance to talk much, but i love and miss you dearly!! You’re the sweetest ray of sunshine and I’m so glad we decided to start our own net!! There’s no one I would’ve rather done it with! You’re so kind and SO incredibly talented!! Your headers always make me so soft 😍 I’m always thinking about you and wishing you well!! 💕

power trio: MY FAM!!! I love you two so incredibly much!! You always manage to brighten up my day! 💕 You’re both so intelligent and eloquent and also absolutely hysterical, you always keep a smile on my face. You guys are always so supportive, and I know I an always count on you for an accidental yeehaw when I need it 🤠✊. I couldn’t ask for a better twin or triplet, together we shall rule over all of ssbts 👑💜

rina: miss rina i love you so much I tagged both of your blogs!!! You are just the very sweetest and I love and appreciate you so incredibly much! Thank you so much for reaching out whenever I really need someone and for sharing your own experiences with me. You are SO incredibly talented, I’m always in awe of all of your creations!! You’re always so well-spoken and just the very sweetest I’m soft 💕 Also thank you again for the greatest url on the planet, I truly love it so much ;~;

rebecca: We only just started talking, but you are so incredibly sweet and hysterical and I love you dearly!!! Every hufflepuff needs a slytherin!! 💕 I love yelling about how much we both love bts together, and I’m always here to help make sure you’re up to date with content! 💕

skippy: you get a message too cause I know you’ll see this. My note for you is:

u suck.

lol jk (💕) (has that joke gotten old? yes. will i stop doing it? no) the jinkook relationship is strong with this one tbh. We tease each other a bunch, but the love is always and will always be there. My concert buddy to the end apparently, I truly never expected you to follow me down the kpop hole and I’m never gonna shut up about it because it always makes me laugh 😂💕 You’re one of the funniest people I know (truly like the mvp himself I hope you know), and I love you lots. Anyways you’re fab, thank you for being the best bud I could ask for and for being awake at hours when everyone else is usually asleep~ #loops4life

#sdfgsgdas i hope i didn't forget anyone!!#i was a dumb dumb and waited too long to post this and i know a lot of people changed their url for mono dropping #i think i went and found the people who had changed and properly tagged them #if i didn't i'm so sorry and just assume you were supposed to be here cause you probably were!!#but yeah if i forgot anyone i'm so sorry i love you and feel free to let me know wadfegs #anyway i love you all!!#follow forever #bri.txt

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elizaviento · 5 years

Text

Manipulation (part 6)

Note: I’m so sorry that I’ve fallen behind the posting schedule. The Thanksgiving holiday really sucked up too much of my time. To make up for it, though, I’ve made this part extra long! :)

NSFW lite -- 5400 words

(FYI: This story is a sequel/companion piece to Assimilation, which can be found in the Rick Fic Masterpost link in my blog’s description along with additional chapters of Manipulation. Or, you can click the #manipulation tag in this post, within my blog, to access all additional chapters.)

*****

The moment she disappeared into the kitchen, slamming the door behind her, I released a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. That breath morphed into a groan as I slumped over my workstation with my head in my hands.

Decades of guarded bitterness was all it took. I was so practiced in the art of hateful sarcasm that I didn’t even have to try. The words just materialized in my throat and pushed their way past my teeth and sprung from my mouth like projectile vomit. And, they produced the desired effect. She wasn’t the type to yell or scream or throw objects in anger or hold a grudge. Instead, she’d simply move on. She’d continue to be cordial and polite, but detached – as she’d been with me since her return.

“You aren’t special.”

I chuckled dryly to myself as I replayed the words in my mind time and again, ripping my hands through my hair. I was under no illusions that she wasn’t smart enough to suss out the lie. No matter what, her memories of the way I’d behaved on Unity’s planet would continue to return until the entire puzzle was solved. At this point, she knew I was under the false impression that she was herself, therefore, she knew that I’d pursued her, not Unity. So, I was taking advantage of her unwillingness to call me out. Plain and simple.

Broken from my self reflection by the sound of the front door slamming shut, I quickly rose and punched the garage door opener. As the door slowly began to rise, I ducked my head to catch a glimpse of tennis shoes as they marched down the driveway, toward the street. By the time the garage door had finally made its ascent, she was just an outline obscured by the sun as she pounded the pavement – one foot in front of the other, carrying her completely out of sight.

----------

The remaining hours passed quickly as I was finally able to muster up the concentration that had eluded me for the past month. I worked on several unfinished projects, fiddling around with this and that, while I waited for Morty to return from school. Unfortunately, this was one of the days that Beth insisted he stay until the very end, which frustrated me to no end.

One of the projects that I’d decided to take up was improving the inter-dimensional goggles. I had heard rumors from around the multiverse that certain Ricks had come up with a way to make the goggles completely immersible so that the subject using the goggles felt as if they had assumed the body of their counterpart instead of just watching as an onlooker. Doing a quick scan, I’d been able to narrow down a few Ricks with such goggles so I needed Morty’s help with looting the chumps.

Just as I was checking my watch with a scowl, wondering how much longer Morty would be stuck at school, I caught a glimpse of him running toward the house from the street. I’d honestly never seen him run that fast, even from life threatening situations, so I stood from my stool and met him at the threshold of the garage.

“RICK! RICK!” he screamed as he approached, his face beet red and contorted in a mixture of concern and horror. Waiting for him to continue, I placed my hands on my hips as he stumbled toward me, bending at the waist to catch his breath. “Rick… you – you gotta – she’s laying on the sidewalk. I-I-I think she – I think she’s DYING, Rick!”

“What the fuck are you talkin’ about, Morty?!” I asked, suddenly flushed from head to toe with panic. I grasped his shoulders and shook, his small body flopping back and forth with each thrust and pull.

“There – t-t-there’s no time to explain, Rick! J-j-just follow me, okay?” He ran away in the direction he’d come and I followed.

About a quarter of a mile from the house, we approached the body of a woman lying face up on the sidewalk – just as Morty said. She was wearing athletic gear and had ear buds jammed in her ears. The volume of the music was so loud that it could be heard from a couple of feet away. Well, her eardrums must be shot to shit, at least, I thought as Morty toppled to the sidewalk beside her, picking up one of her arms to shake it violently in an effort to rouse her.

“HURRY THE – THE FUCK UP S-S-SHE MAY BE DYING OH MY – OH MY GOD!” Morty screamed like a lunatic as I slowed my pace and approached in the most nonchalant manner I could manage.

“Ugh, cut the dramatics, w-will ya Morty?” I groaned. No sooner had the words left my mouth, she giggled. Relief washed over me and I felt my spine loosen as I drew closer, standing directly over her. Her eyes were wide open and she squinted as I blocked out the sun. “Well, l-l-look at that, Morty. She lives!”

“Go away,” she said. “Let me fry my retinas in peace.”

“Yeeeah, nope,” I replied as I bent at the waist to grab her arms and tug. Thankfully, she found the strength to coax her body upward, making it much easier to pull her into a standing position before wrapping my arms around her thighs to hoist her up and over my shoulder. She was as limp as a rag doll and I could feel the pounding of her heart against the back of my shoulder as I tightened my hold on her thighs with one arm and dug in my coat for the portal gun with the other.

“I’m fine, Morty. Just got a bit overheated,” she spoke as her upper body dangled down my back. Glancing toward Morty, I saw him standing within an inch of her face, his face etched with worry.

“Are you kiddin’ me? Y-y-you’re less than half a mile from the house,” I scoffed. The concern I’d been attempting to keep at bay began to creep back with a vengeance. Something had happened to her and I had my suspicions on what.

“I s-s-saw you while walking – when I was coming home from school,” Morty added. I felt her body stiffen with this new information – that she’d been lying on the sidewalk for hours. Then, she giggled again. Suddenly struck by the recollection that she tended to giggle when she was nervous, upset or unsure, my concern spiked higher as I pulled the trigger on the portal gun and carried her through.

As we emerged in the den, I felt her warm breath penetrate my lab coat and sweater as she forcefully sighed in relief directly against my back before she spoke.

“Just toss me on the bed.”

Doing exactly as she instructed, I cringed as I witnessed her body bounce once on the stiff mattress. Real smooth, Sanchez, I thought as I exited the room, leaving Morty behind.

Scrapping the plan to drag Morty along with me while looting that evening, I skulked to my bedroom and flopped down on the cot to think.

I was certain that she had suffered some type of seizure or episode of unconsciousness while her brain struggled to recall and interpret the memories of assimilation. I had never witnessed this myself but several beings I had tracked down years prior had explained similar instances when memories would flood back suddenly without warning. Most of the time, the assimilated memories would mash together with other memories of the being’s past as a way for the brain to catalog the additions in an acceptable manner. Usually these episodes would last between minutes to hours at a time and the beings would return to a normal state of consciousness afterward with the memories sorted and cataloged accordingly. So, she would probably be fine.

Right?

Throwing an arm over my eyes, I willed my brain to shut down. I hadn’t had a decent sleep since arriving on Unity’s planet so a nap wouldn’t hurt. Before I could even begin to drift off, however, the familiar sound of the 20th Century Fox intro drifted through the thin walls along with her voice, mingled with Morty’s and Summer’s. Groaning, I tried to ignore it and even managed to doze off for about an hour before the sound of Jerry’s voice joined them and I gave up entirely. So, exiting my small room to join them as well, I plopped down on the armchair and fixed my eyes to the screen.

In my peripheral vision, I saw her quickly glance in my direction before focusing her attention back on the B-rated horror film. I’d remembered her and Beth watching this particular movie over and over when they were in high school, laughing their asses off each and every time. What the fuck was it called? At any rate, it didn’t much matter as it was just another of a series of movies featuring some killer doll with red hair and a butcher knife super glued to its hand or something. And, after about an hour of this shit feature film, Beth walked through the front door looking completely beat.

“Don’t tell me you’re watching Bride of Chucky again,” Beth laughed as she flopped down on the sofa next to her best friend.

“Bethany, my love, you know this is your favorite movie as much as it is mine. And, this is the special anniversary edition,” she replied, never taking her eyes from the screen.

“You know, you two would, like, totally be called lesbos in school these days,” Summer said from the love seat, tapping away on her phone.

“Who said we weren’t when we were in school?” Beth retorted with her eyebrow raised.

“Yeah,” Jerry joined, sounding defeated, “even when your mom was pregnant with you, everyone thought I was just the sperm donor.”

She and Beth both laughed while Morty and Summer cried, “EWW,” in unison. I, however, audibly scoffed and she threw me a sidelong glance before quickly darting her eyes back toward the screen.

“Do you want me to make you something for dinner?” she asked Beth.

“Nah, I stopped by McDonald’s on my way home and rammed ten chicken nuggets down my throat while driving.”

“Sexy,” she replied as Beth hauled herself up from the sofa to head toward the bathroom.

“I just need a long, hot bath and a box of the finest red,” Beth assured as she disappeared down the hall.

As the night wore on, everyone shuffled from the living room to other areas of the house. By the time she inserted the final DVD – some shitty zombie affair – she and I were the only ones left. When the menu appeared on the screen, she took her place back on the sofa to lie down, ignoring me throughout the entire process. Just as she settled down and appeared comfortable, the overwhelming concern I had attempted to stuff down made a reappearance and I couldn’t fight the urge to confront her any longer.

Rising from the armchair to approach the sofa, I closed each hand around her ankles and moved them toward the floor. Once she had adjusted herself into a proper sitting position, I took a seat next to her. Instead of acknowledging me, as I hoped she would, she continued to ignore me, pressing play on the remote control.

“What – uh – w-w-what happened out there?” I asked, raising my voice slightly to be heard over the volume of the television. Rolling her eyes, she pressed the pause button and turned her body to face mine fully. The look of utter annoyance on her face was enough to convey that my earlier words had affected her more than she had initially let on.

“I don’t know, Rick,” she began, her tone icy but determined. “I had some kind of mental meltdown, I guess. Let me ask you something. Have you ever been assimilated by an alien hive mind that’s determined to make its former lover confess it wants to bang someone else? ‘Cause I gotta admit, that was a first for me and my tiny inferior human brain is having just a little bit of trouble processing the onslaught of confusing memories of what said hive mind did to AND with my body when I had absolutely no control. Do you even realize that Unity doesn’t completely eliminate the original consciousness of its victims? I was still in there, the entire time, and there was nothing I could do! I was completely trapped! I was essentially raped and, since you had no idea that I wasn’t really me, so were you! How is this not affecting you, Rick?! Are you really so disconnected from anything human that you don’t realize – or don’t CARE – what exactly happened or the type of manipulation that was forced upon both of us?!”

She was breathing heavily, her voice thick with emotion, as she glanced around the room to make sure that the rise in her tone hadn’t attracted the attention of anyone else in the house. When her eyes settled back on me, she allowed them to roam my face for several seconds as she awaited my response. But, before I could even begin to form one that could accurately convey the guilt that was eating me alive over what had occurred, she got up and left. Without another word or even a second glance, she was gone.

----------

Two hours later, as the movie she’d inserted prior to her departure automatically resumed, I was taking another swig from the vodka bottle I’d dug from my emergency stash in the garage when my cell phone rang. Ignoring it at first, I let it go to voicemail. But, when it immediately began to ring for the second time, I sighed and dug it from my lab coat to check the caller ID. It was Beth and I already knew what she wanted.

“What is it, sweetie?” I asked as soon as I tapped the answer icon on the screen. Judging by the loud heavy metal music blaring in the background, they must have gone to the new biker bar that had opened the previous week.

“Dad, you have to come help me. Please! They’re so drunk, there’s no way I can get them home by myself!”

“Ugh, okay. I’ll be there in a second,” I replied, already removing the portal gun from my coat.

“No, no. You know how Jerry feels about going through portals,” she shouted over the music, already guessing my plan. “He’s still terrified that he will be turned inside out after what you told him!”

“If he’s drunk, he w-w-won’t know the difference, sweetie. I’ll just pull – push him through and he’ll be fine.”

“Dad, I don’t ask much from you – ”

“Beth, listen to me. I’m portaling there now. Just – j-j-just make sure –”

“No, you listen to me! I need your help and you’re going to come here and provide it! You can get here by portal but you have to ride back in the car with us.”

“Why do I need to do that?!” I asked, raising my voice in frustration. The last thing I wanted to do was ride home with Beth’s idiotic husband falling asleep and drooling on my shoulder.

“In case one of them needs to puke, Dad! Look I can handle Jerry. Can you please just come and help me with – ”

“Yes!” I answered, a little too enthusiastically when I knew I wouldn’t be taking care of Jerry after all. Reigning myself in, I continued, “Yeah, I-I-I’ll help you with your friend, Beth. But, that’s it.”

“Okay, fine. Thanks, Dad.”

----------

“Where’s my money, chump?!” I heard her scream triumphantly as she bent over what appeared to be a chess board with an incredibly large biker man leaning over the other side, a scowl firmly etching his burly features.

“You gotta be KIDDING ME!” the large man bellowed from across the table. “You’re smashed! How are you cheating? I know you are!”

She mumbled something under her breath as she cradled her head in her hands. She was much more drunk that I had anticipated and I smirked as I approached her from behind.

“What did you say to me?” the large man asked, standing from his stool and leaning over further while placing his hands flat on the table.

“Uhh, she said nuttin’ s-sir,” Jerry slurred next to her before she forcefully shoved him away, stood from her stool, as well, and slammed her hands on the table.

“I saaaid… SUCK MY DICK, BITCH!” She dissolved into a fit of adorable giggles as the large man across the table contorted his face into an expression of pure shock. Deciding now was the time to end this little encounter for her own good, I curled both hands around her shoulders and pulled her away.

“Oookay, little miss – miss drunky poo. Time to – to grow the fuck up before you get your ass kicked.”

“Get your hands off me!” she shouted, trying to shake me off but only losing her balance, causing me to wrap my arms around her waist to keep her from falling flat on her ass.

“Hey, the lady said to let her go,” the large man said as he made his way around the table toward us.

Yeah, good attempt at – uh – chivalry there, Butch or Bear or-or-or Big Bass. What the fuck ever,” I retorted, possessively tightening my hold on her waist.

“Skinny man, you’re about to get a whoopin’ like you ain’t never –” the large man began before Beth stepped between us. She could be such a badass when the situation called for it and I couldn’t contain my grin of pride.

“Hey, hi there. This man is my father and he’s just trying to help me get my very drunk husband and friend home in one piece. So, thanks Mister uhh…”

“Toby.”

“Toby. Right. Thanks for humoring my friend here, Toby. I’m sorry you lost so much money to her but, you know… bye now.”

“Hey!” Toby called as I continued pulling her backward toward the door. “What’s your number?”

Fat chance, I thought as I kicked the door open with my foot and yanked her outside with Beth shoving Jerry right behind us. Once again, that delightful giggle bubbled from her chest as I roughly turned her around and hoisted her over my shoulder for the second time that day.

----------

Again, her body was as limp as a rag doll as I carried her toward Beth’s car. And, again, I could feel her warm breath penetrating the layers of clothing as she continued to giggle directly against my back.

“I love you so-ssooo much, Beff,” Jerry slurred as Beth directed him toward the passenger side door.

“Yes, Jerry. I know. I love you, too.”

“You always been my dream girl,” he continued, throwing his arm around her neck and going in for a kiss, tongue first. Beth quickly turned her head and leaned back as far as she could while in Jerry’s vice grip.

“Ugh – sheesh, Jerry.” I chimed in, rolling my eyes. “Is – is that the line you fed her the night you knocked her up?”

Avoiding Beth’s death glare, I felt a snicker against my back as Jerry fell on his ass while trying to climb into the passenger seat. Beth groaned in frustration and bent down to try to pull him up by the armpits.

“Oh, you – uh – think that’s funny, huh? Little miss one and done,” I commented.

“Had more than one. Had a bunch!”

“Oh, t-t-that’s impressive. Now, let’s get you in the car before you – before it’s barf city down my back.”

After opening the door to the backseat, I leaned forward and loosened my grip on her thighs. As her body slid up into a standing position before me, she slumped forward to press her face just below my collarbone in an attempt to remain upright. She was breathing heavily and I suppress a moan as she tilted her head upward just enough so that her hot breath wafted across my neck. Grabbing her biceps, I attempted to peel her from my body and maneuver her into the car, however, it seemed she had other plans when both of her arms slipped under my lab coat and wrapped tightly around my torso. Going completely rigid, my mind raced as I considered my options, which where few.

I could forcefully pry her arms from my torso and shove her into the car. Or, I could attempt to gently coax her. As I was weighing the pros and cons of each option, Beth became impatient and wasn’t shy about expressing it.

“Dad, what’s taking so long?” Beth asked while leaning out the window of the driver’s seat. Luckily, we were on the opposite side of the car and her view was limited to the top of my head.

“Uhh, j-j-just a second, sweetie,” I replied, my voice wavering slightly as she squeezed her arms around me tighter and took a deep breath. Having chosen for me with her possibly unintended affection, I settled my chin on top of her head and said, just above a whisper, “Come – come on, baby. Can you let me – can you be a good girl for me and get in the car?”

Stiffening slightly, she simply nodded against my chest. Then, settling a hand on her lower back, I walked her backward toward the open door. When her ass bumped the side of the car, I slid my hand from her back and placed both hands on her hips to gently push her from my body and turn her sideways, lining her up with the opening. I then slid my hands slowly up her body – making sure to mentally catalog each curve as they roved – until one was again on her lower back and the other settled on the back of her neck. Pushing slightly to coax her to bend at the waist, I then pushed her inside. Once seated, she scooted all the way to the other side of the backseat cabin, behind Beth, and slouched against the headrest before I situated myself into the small space behind Jerry.

“Finally,” Beth grumbled, starting the car and putting it into gear. Jerry was babbling away in the passenger seat like a moron, as usual.

“Hey, Jerry. Mind – uh – moving the seat up so I have more than two inches of leg room?” I spat, pounding Jerry’s headrest from behind with my fist. Jerry groaned and flopped forward, banging his head on the dash.

“Dad! If you make him barf in my car, I swear I’ll make you clean it up! And, I mean the old fashion way. No gadgets or cleaning bots or whatever.”

Without replying, I leaned forward to reach the electronic seat controls in the middle console, pressing the button to move Jerry’s seat up all the way. And, as I leaned back – without a second thought on what the fuck I was doing or the potential consequences – my hand casually caught her forearm and tugged. Her upper body flopped to the side to rest against my arm, her head on my shoulder. And, as she peered up at my face, I pulled my arm from under her, swooped it around her neck, and used my other hand to grab her thigh and pull until she was flush against me. When she snaked one arm around my back, one around my torso, and sank further into me with her head resting on my chest, I slid my hips forward to lean further back in the seat so that her position was more comfortable.

What the hell was I doing? My daughter and son-in-law were no more than three feet away and here I was – pulling their best friend and twin sister into a forced embrace. But, she wasn’t resisting. In fact, she seemed to be reciprocating. Because she’s drunk, you fucking pervert, my better angel spoke from the shoulder her head wasn’t resting against. Glancing down at her, I could only make out the outline of her body in the darkness as she wiggled in even closer, curling the fingers of the arm behind my back around the fabric of my sweater in the same manner as when we were watching television with Unity. And, even though that hadn’t been her, the memory sparked and ignited that all consuming passion for her within me once more that couldn’t be extinguished with something as silly as logic.

Noticing I still hadn’t removed my hand from her thigh and that my thumb had absently been rubbing back and forth across her jeans, I once again gave in to my base urges. Gliding the arm around her neck to her lower back, tracing my fingers down her spine along the way, I curled it around her waist to rest my hand on her hip. At this point, her breathing had become heavy and I could tell that she was turned on, which only served to encourage me. Again, the little voice on my shoulder screamed that she was intoxicated, but somehow, I couldn’t seem to care.

Gently squeezing her hip, I pulled her even closer. The hand I had planted on her thigh tugged until her leg was draped over mine and I began to rub slowly up – my thumb sliding smoothly in the junction where her thigh met her hip – and then back down to her knee. She exhaled a shaky breath and fisted her hand in the back of my sweater in response, seeming to urge me on. That is, until my hand made its next journey up her thigh, her body stiffened and jerked as she craned her head up from my chest as if she were attempting to see if Beth or Jerry had spied our secret encounter in the backseat.

Tightening my hold on her, I racked my brain for a way to quell her fears before realizing it was much too quiet.

“Hey, Beth – sweetie. How about t-t-turning on some music?”

Beth complied as she came to a stop at a red light. Jerry began singing along, swaying this way and that in the front seat. The light turned green and as Beth began to speed up, I pressed my lips to her hair and slid my hips further forward, sinking us both low enough that I could speak directly into her ear.

“Relax, baby,” I whispered. “T-t-they can’t hear us. Don’t – it’s okay.”

She did relax slightly and I took that as my cue to continue, slipping a hand under her t-shirt to dance my fingers along her ribs before tracing the underwire of her bra. Releasing a shaky whine, she tightened her arms around me as the hand on her thigh made another journey upward – my thumb ghosting her crotch as it slipped once again between the juncture of her hip and thigh.

“Rick,” she sighed, barely audible above the music.

Pressing my lips to her hair to suppress another moan, I could only reply with, “Hmm?” as my hand, never ceasing its motion, made its way back toward her thigh and repeated the same maneuver. Only, this time, I applied pressure with my thumb as it slid over her clothed cunt.

Her reaction was immediate and so fucking satisfying as the hand she had wrapped around my chest flew to her mouth to suppress a moan of her own. Pressing my lips to her hair once more, I took a deep breath to steady myself as my cock responded in turn – steadily swelling with each thunderous beat of my heart.

And, I continued to roam her body – one hand on her thigh that continued to add more pressure with my thumb each time it found its way between her legs and the other taking its place back under her shirt to trace invisible patterns on her ribs. Soon, however, I needed more.

All the years I’d known her, the most intimate form of physical contact we’d shared were two hugs that she’d forced upon me – one after I’d danced with her at Beth and Jerry’s wedding and the other after I’d beat the shit out of the douche bag who had tried to take advantage of her in the backseat of his shitty car. Prior and even after that, it consisted of my arm around her shoulders for photos or her hand lightly touching my arm to gain my attention when I was too wrapped up in work to notice when she or Beth would call for dinner. As time went on, I shied away from even the most innocent touches as my infatuation for her began to bloom and grow. I was a better man then, I supposed. I was the type of man to deny myself carnal pleasures to protect someone innocent and pure, no matter how cliché it seemed. Now, though? Now, I was just another piece of shit who was too weak to deny himself further. Even if she seemed willing now, how was I to know it was genuine? The last time I thought she was willing, she wasn’t even herself and I hadn’t even noticed. Her body may not be occupied by a hive mind parasite at this moment, but she was intoxicated, which – let’s face it – was probably worse. But, still, I needed more.

She flinched when she felt me shift beneath her, but I leaned the side of my body that she was resting upon just enough so that the hand on her thigh could reach her other leg, which I nudged outward to spread her legs further. Once satisfied with its positioning, I moved my hand back to her other thigh and tugged it further into my lap. Her legs now adequately spread to my liking, I hummed against her hair in a relaxing manner while placing my hand directly between them, cupping her clothed cunt in my palm. When she gasped, I chuckled and began to slowly but firmly rub my palm up and down the jean covered mound. The heat radiating from her sex warmed my fingers delightfully as she issued a moan, which she attempted to mute by pressing her face to my chest. Absolutely thrilled with her responsiveness thus far, I pressed my middle finger hard enough to sink between her covered labia and, with the way her hips jerked upward to seek more contact, put direct pressure on her clit.

“Mmm, want – want more? I whispered and she quickly nodded in affirmation.

When I pressed my middle finger again, she angled her hips upward and began to grind against my hand. And, we continued the motion – press and grind – over and over until she was panting and softly grunting with her face still pressed to my chest. I could tell she was close as the rhythm of her rolling hips faltered and her entire body began to tremble. I applied more pressure – deeper and faster – softly mumbling encouragement and praise against her hair that I was sure she couldn’t hear over the music but I couldn’t care. She was so close. I was going to make this beautiful woman cum with the most basic form of stimulation.

Then, Jerry woke up with a start, causing to Beth flinch and focus her attention in his direction. The spell now broken, I immediately pulled my hand back and sat up a little straighter in the seat.

“Ooohhh,” Jerry moaned. “I’m gonna – gonna puke. Beth, I’m gonna puke!”

“God damn it,” Beth sighed as she pulled over onto the shoulder. “I knew it.”

As soon as the car came to a stop, Jerry flung open the passenger door – triggering the cabin light to illuminate the debauched scene in the back seat – and projectile vomited on a dead raccoon.

To be continued...

P.S. Credit for the fully immersive inter-dimensional goggles goes to the lovely @porkchop-ao3 from her story Someone Else’s Shoes, which you can read on Ao3 under her username PorkChop.

#rick and morty #rick sanchez x reader #rick sanchez #fanfiction #sister smith series #manipulation

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kusunokihimea · 5 years

Text

[ Art || Background ]

[ Hey y’all! So uh...while this iteration of my dinky blog isn’t three years old, I have been lurking around this site in total (for RP) for three years now, as of...technically yesterday, eh heh. And good golly there has been a LOTTA growth since then. My muses and I have come a looong way, in regards to writing, editing, and getting to know so many people over the course of three years. Some have come and gone, and some have stayed...though few since those beginning days when Sylvie had NO idea what they were doing, ha!

And though I’ve only recently gone through my second revamp, there’s still a gaggle a’y’all that have stuck around. Some even from those very beginning days. So, I’d like to take a minute to just...gush about some of ya, cuz you’ve made being in this community fun, welcoming, and honestly like a second family to us. While I don’t have time to ramble about EVERYONE, I’m gonna do my darnedest to do as much as I can, and just...say thank you for making me able to stay this long, and have as much fun as I’ve had. It means the world to me <3

Now, on to the ramblin’! Under a cut, cuz...it’s probably gonna get long xD Still, I’ll try to be brief so it doesn’t get too out of control, lmao ]

[ The Fam Jam ]

So these are the peeps that have stuck by me through thick, thin, and many blog changes xD Those who have consistently interacted with us, and have developed amazing bonds between muns and muses alike. <3

@13lilypetals - Little sib Ghost. Fellow SH trash. Also a multimuse juggler. You’ve been someone who’s become a close friend, wonderful RP partner, and a great member of the community as a whole. Keep up the awesome work!

@ascxndinggg Matt, my son, darling baby boy =P With such a creative, intelligent mind, wonderful diverse muses, and one of the few things keeping me sane both on this hellsite, and in life in general. Love you bud.

@duckbuttavenger / @cutelittlemuffins / @straycatanbu Sanjiii, such a sweetheart. I love your beans, and I love you! You’re always a blast to write with, even if we know some muses better than others. They’re all 11/10!

@despairinghxpe / @masterofwar Phoenix, omg I’m so glad you’re back. I’ve had some of my most in-depth threads with you and your boyos. I always look forward to your replies. And you’re such a darling - always a joy to talk to ooc about our beans!

@gentlegraceful-and-fatal Dani, I know you’re not on much anymore, and I hope life’s not kickin’ your butt too hard. You put so much love into your muses, and I love when they interact with mine. Here’s hoping you can creep around more soon enough x3

@frogprinceus / @redlineoffate / @red-winged-hero-hawks Omg Mitsuki where do I even start with you xD You have such a wonderful cast of muses, so many of which have bonded so wonderfully with mine. I always enjoy our interactions, no matter what combo of beans!

@flakclad I know you’re not on too much anymore Rhi, but I still love your boys (tho I think this is the only one I’m currently following after remaking, whoops). You give them such wonderful personalities, and I love writing with them any day of the week.

@yukaikokoro Another OC bean! Star oh my goodness, you’re such a great friend and writing partner - you let me drown you in all my OG verse shenanigans, and I love it xD

@twojackalsandahedgie Apricot! I’ve stalked you around through a few blogs now, haha! You’re such a sweetheart, and your muses are great. I can’t wait to see how your blog takes shape once it’s even MORE of a multimuse!

@hotmessofmuses I’ve loved all our threads, Bailey - you write all your muses so well, and I’ve been so psyched to get to interact with them, especially in the famjam verses. It’s so much fun. And good luck with all you’re doing irl!

@roaringxflames Lief dear, I know you’re not active much anymore, but I just want you to know I’ve enjoyed all of our interactions, here and on other bloggus. I hope life is treating you well, and you find greener pastures in new fandoms :3

@cinderspewed / @bitebxck Oh goodness Verona, you’re just! Such a cool person, and your muse is so dynamic and intriguing and drives my marshmallow nuts xD I hope school isn’t crushing your soul too badly, haha! Good fortune, friend!

@kyuuzuchiha / @thebubbledome / @xkaekox BOOOOO I LOVE YOUR BEANS. I know that feel about having trouble writing/catching up lately, but! No matter your pace, we love writing with you, and I hope you find your groove soon!

@quiet-kunoichi Ahaha, Jack, another fellow OC bean. I love your muse. I think you know that but just to be sure, lemme say it again. And you’re great. You’re both great. I love ya. And I hope you’re well!

@abyssaldespair Meeeg...your boyo has stolen my gorl xD We’ve had so many shenanigans since we met I can’t count them, but gosh you’re so fun to write with, and even tho you’ve abandoned me (jk, jk), I still love writing our babbs in drabbles. I will sink with this ship xD

@wanderingmelodies MEEEY I know you’re super swamped but I hope you know I love ya and your beans and I hope you get your zine work done! Good luck and stuff, and hopefully life lets up for you soon, dear!

@multicanon-rp Bruh, I love your Itachi (and I’ve seen snippets of your other beans, they’re great!). It’s been so much fun to see him and Ryū get to know each other from that initial drama. I love writing with ya!

@hushedsunflower *squints at* Who even is this nerd? Oh right, you’re the one responsible for me even being here! Not to mention one of my oldest friends, nbd =P I love your Hina, and I’m glad you’ve gotten back into RP, my friend~

[ The Inspirations ]

These are the ones I’ve maybe not RPed with as much as I’d like, but who inspire me to be better in my writing, my lore creation, and characterization! <3

@hyugainterior / @clanburden Your storytelling skill just...blows my mind, holy smokes. Though I miss bits and pieces, your narrative on HI has been enrapturing, and I always try to catch all the drabbles. I never know what’s gonna happen next, but I can’t look away - it’s like a beautiful, horrible car crash! With Hinata in the driver’s seat!

@sennenryuu / @raikirisms N, your OC is just...so amazingly in-depth. As someone who adores making lore and characters, yours has been one I’ve looked up to since being introduced to your blog. And don’t even get me started on your Kakashi, or how beautiful your art is, my goodness. I love it all!

@houndnin / @mactabilis A blast from the past! I know you’re uber busy so you prolly won’t see this, but omg your muses are the bee’s knees. Another well-crafted OC, and an awesome take on Kakashi. Definitely a blog that inspires me to keep improving!

@masshirohebi Oh goodness, this blog is one I’ve looked up to for a long time. You write Orochimaru so beautifully. They’re so intricate and full of life and detail. Your replies are so well put-together, it always blows me away. I know our interactions have been brief, but I’ve enjoyed them so much!

[ The Neat Beans ]

Those on the ‘outer fringe’ - maybe we’ve poked at each other’s muses once or twice, but we’re still workin’ on getting muses to know each other - here’s to more! <3

~*~ @silverfaxg ~*~ @ketsuekki ~*~ @i-minato-chan ~*~ @kotoanatsukami ~*~ @crackuzu ~*~ @the-younger-umino ~*~ @origami-goddess ~*~ @inumbratte / @willsoffire / @leafstruck ~*~

[ The Lurkers ]

And last (but certainly not least), the beans I’ve not really talked to, but appreciate for bein’ around nonetheless! Never be afraid to say hi <3

~*~ @betterhealing ~*~ @tennome ~*~ @hiramekxrei ~*~ @tentaiiled / @sandsharrk ~*~ @dirt-ninja ~*~ @strengthwilled ~*~ @silentyoru ~*~ @blossomfury ~*~ @inotheflower ~*~ @cxmpetitivecaptain ~*~ @malacusleana ~*~ @granddiviner ~*~ @avengeriiism ~*~ @xchidoriisms ~*~

All right, I really hope that’s everyone - my following list is still rather short after the move, so I wanted to at least give everyone a mention and a lil thank you. Here’s to another three years, fates allowing! Thank you all again for your support - it means the world <3

#sylvie speaketh [ ooc ]#three year tumblr anniversary #follow forever #long post #veeery long post lmao #i'm pretty sure that's EVERYONE i'm following (that's an RP blog)#if i forgot you i'm so so so sorry #i got like four hours of sleep so i'm v tired #just poke me and i'll add you!#but i went through my following list so #hopefully everyone is there #and hopefully i got everyone with the same mun laid out right xD #sometimes i forget if muns have more than one bloggu ahaha

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so101powersangrelive · 5 years

Text

The Ultimatum Experiment

The first experiment that Pam offers in her book could be best described as an ULTIMATUM. In this experiment, we'll give the FP 48 hours to deliver an unexpected gift or blessing. We won't specify anything specific; we'll just ask it to send us a gift that we wouldn't normally receive — something truly unexpected, so it's dead obvious when it arrives and it can't be written off as coincidence.

I initiated this experiment at 7:10 pm on Thursday, September 8th, 2016 as I was hiking down a mountain. I actually made an audio recording of the request that I made to the universe. Here's the transcript of what I said…

Thu, Sep 8th, 2016 at 7:10pm

Dear Universe,

I am asking you to give me conclusive proof that I am a creator, that I create with my thoughts and desires. What I am asking you to do is to deliver to me some unexpected gift that will be blatantly obvious when it arrives. Something that wouldn't normally occur and something fairly impressive and convincing because I'm doing this as an experiment that I will publish on my blog for all to see. And I'm asking for it in the next 24 hours. I'm asking for this deadline because if we go too long, I might not be able to suspend my disbelief in this process, and doubt might creep in. And we don't want that to happen because doubt is a manifestation killer.

Thanks,

Jeff

Notice that my statement was more like a request than a demand or command. This is just my style; a full-on ultimatum would have worked just as well. The FP doesn't care exactly how you express your desire; it just responds to your thoughts and expectations.

Also, notice that I accidentally gave a deadline of 24 hours rather than 48 hours as intended. Hey, I had a brain fart, what can I say. But guess what? My gift was delivered within 24 hours! Actually, it came in well short of that, it arrived the very next morning — a mere 14 hours after initiating the experiment! Here's the email that I received that contained my unexpected gift…

From: The Editor, WakingTimes.com

Sent: Fri, Sep 9, 2016 at 9:17 AM

Subject: Can I publish your epic article "The Multidimensional Self"?

Hey Jeff,

I trust all is well. Doing great here. Wondering if I may have your permission to post your epic article on the multi-dimensional self. http://divine-cosmos.net/multidimensional-self.htm

Thanks in advance for your consideration,

Peace

Unexpected But Just What I Needed and Wanted!

This request for permission to publish my article The Multidimensional Self was truly UNEXPECTED! I hadn't submitted this or any other article to WakingTimes.com. In fact, I hadn't submitted an article or had one published by another website for quite a while. And my blogs traffic and engagement was suffering because of it.

Since my budding writing career and my blog is the centerpiece of my life right now, the growth of my blogs audience is of great importance to me. I'd actually been thinking quite a bit about my need and desire to get another guest post on another website and had been doing a lot of thinking about what sites to submit to.

So of course, I was delighted when this unexpected, but very appropriate gift arrived, and I immediately seized the opportunity. The success of this experiment is a great example of how manifesting works — it draws to you information, people, things, and CIRCUMSTANCES consistent with your strongest and most predominant thoughts and desires. Even thou I hadn't specified what I wanted the Universe still delivered exactly what had been on my mind and most important to me!

Now It's Your Turn

Can I coax some of you into trying this experiment and reporting your results back here in the comment section of this post? Suspend your disbelief for 48 hours and dive into this experiment! You've got nothing to lose and so much to gain. What could be more important than discovering that YOU ARE A CREATOR!

Let the magic begin!

Jeff

[email protected]

So universe- one all we you us..... make it undeniable- blatant conspicuous and loud - I need a blessing . I need proof ! I neeed demand desire a great gift that I am held back from asking from within a d throughout. I’m asking out of a deep need. It is a request abd with great gray better expectation than I have now the words to use... please within all that is better that I will not unsubscribe to - the smile - the kiddos - that love and people - individuals are not separate- very special. And and and.... fir all thru me as a vessel, 24 hours from right now, July 10, 2019- in the jaw of attraction prove that I am as I believe and with non accusingly aware so tiny so big- I give permission to ask expect and genuinely revive receive the blessing the gift of my hearts desire that helps me to pay forward. Humbly and expecting no less than the sonething that will be what surprises and regenerates forward live and blessings, movement security and true unfaltering forever faith and hope and creative manifestations tibtge better is better .... 6:17pm . I kniw I’m your j let me be who I am truly meant and deploy desire to be . I ask fir all this and more drone here thismonebt and every moment thereafter - you have the better you kniw the j niw go with my best and least ready for, most needed, my gift of gifts I’ll see what you provide by my demand and experiment. No harm no foul free and ckear to alll - loud and happy with love from here to tonite thank you directly in advance theoatrrnand viberatikb is even so much more perfect . Amen love and one .

and and let To all be benefiting from this tans not ever short of infinite.

Thanks

Till then

Already moving out of the way and manifesting without a doubt- but will see it and loud gafagagaga

#ninja.stitous

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seraph-novak · 6 years

Note

Genderbend TJ doesn't like Buffy solely because she's better than her(TJ) at basketball. Cyrus talks to TJ and they end up falling for each other.

I decided to keep their names the same, because I’m lazy. Plus, you didn’t specify if you wanted Cyrus to be genderbent as well, but I can’t imagine a universe where Cyrus is straight, so I made them both girls. I hope you enjoy!

Also available on AO3 ♥

P.S. I know I don’t post as regularly as some of the amazing writers in this fandom, but any votes for the Andi Mack Blog Awards would be very much appreciated. Thank you!

TJ was staring at the back of Buffy Driscoll’s head, trying her best to burn a hole through the other girl’s skull with her penetrating glare. Buffy was stood next to the bleachers, effortlessly bouncing a basketball by her side as she chatted with Cyrus Goodman, the adorable 7th grader TJ had been crushing on for months. Buffy’s close relationship with Cyrus was just another reason to hate her, on top of her not-so-subtle intention to steal TJ’s position as captain of the girls’ basketball team.

Cyrus laughed at something Buffy had said, and TJ felt her heart clenching miserably. She wondered what it was like to make Cyrus Goodman laugh. She expected it was similar to wringing sunshine from the sky.

TJ tilted her head to the side and focussed her gaze on Cyrus, allowing herself to admire the gorgeous brunette from afar. She was wearing a yellow dress over a white shirt, and her shoulder-length hair was tucked away from her face in a pale blue headband, which perfectly matched the colour of her ankle boots. And to make the outfit even more adorable, her shirt was adorned with tiny, cartoon dinosaurs.

A dreamy sigh escaped TJ’s lips. She covered it up with a cough and threw the ball in her hands across the court, deliberately aiming for Buffy’s legs. The younger girl yelped as the ball hit the back of her thighs, and TJ felt a sick twist of pleasure in her gut. She knew she was being a bitch, but she was too consumed with bitterness to care.

“Come on!” she shouted to Buffy. “Stop flirting with your girlfriend and do some actual work!”

Buffy clenched her fists and took a step towards TJ, but Cyrus grabbed her arm and pulled her back, whispering something against her ear. TJ swallowed the lump of jealousy in her throat and tried not to imagine what Cyrus was saying about her. No doubt, it was something unkind. Not that she didn’t deserve it.

“Fine,” Buffy said, shooting TJ a glare as she walked to the opposite side of the court. “She’s not even worth it.”

TJ glanced over at Cyrus, her breath hitching as she caught the other girl’s eye. Cyrus pressed her lips together and stared down at her feet. She looked so sad and disappointed, and it made TJ feel even crappier for starting a pointless argument. Why couldn’t she just leave things alone?

A little over an hour later, the coach blew his whistle and everyone made their way towards the locker room, patting each other on the backs with sweaty foreheads and tired grins. TJ started collecting the stray balls rolling about the gym as the others disappeared through the double doors. She was almost finished putting the balls in the large trolley at the back of the gym when she heard the doors open again, and Cyrus came walking through, a determined frown on her face.

“Oh,” TJ said, running a hand through her short, slicked-back hair. “Hey. Um… What are you doing here?”

Cyrus inhaled deeply, her shoulders bunching up, and said, “Gay girls are perfectly capable of having female friends, you know? Just because my best friend happens to be a girl, doesn’t mean we’re secretly dating.”

TJ wrinkled her nose. “What are you talking about?”

“You called me Buffy’s girlfriend,” Cyrus said, folding her arms impatiently. TJ caught a flash of tiny dinosaurs and fought back a smile. “And, yeah. I know you weren’t being serious. But don’t you think I’m tired of people making gay jokes at my expense all the time? Don’t you think I’m sick of people constantly assuming I’m in love with every girl I know, just because I’m gay?”

TJ winced. “I didn’t mean it like that. I was only trying to get a rise out of Buffy.” She fiddled with the cords hanging from her shorts and shrugged. “I’m gay too.”

“You are?”

“Well, not openly, but yeah.”

Cyrus relaxed slightly. “I didn’t know.”

“No one does.”

TJ risked a glance at Cyrus, surprised to see the blush creeping up her neck. Cyrus bit her lip and looked away. It was unfairly adorable. TJ struggled against the urge to reach forward and lift her chin, to let her fingers explore the soft expanse of Cyrus’ face, to feel the burn of Cyrus’ blush against her skin…

She cleared her throat, cursing herself for getting carried away. The last thing she wanted to do was scare Cyrus off by staring at her like a creeper.

“Why do you hate Buffy so much?” Cyrus suddenly asked her, clearly trying to dispel the awkwardness.

TJ sighed. “Because she’s good at basketball. Maybe even better than me.” She couldn’t believe how it easy it was, being honest with Cyrus. It was such a relief to say these things out loud, without worrying about the consequences. For some reason, she knew Cyrus would keep her secret safe.

“But you’re good too,” Cyrus insisted, the colour instantly rising to her cheeks again. “I mean, I’ve seen you play. I don’t know much about basketball, but you seem to know what you’re doing. And you’re really good at getting the ball in the basket thingy!”

TJ found herself grinning. “I didn’t know you were paying attention.”

“I wasn’t! Not in a stalkery kind of way.” Cyrus twisted her hands together, her face practically burning. “I just think you’re really good.”

Watching Cyrus stammer and blush was too cute to bear. TJ had never had this effect on another girl before, let alone the one girl she was actually interested in. She hadn’t realised flirting could be so fun. She wanted to keep pushing the conversation, to test the limits of this budding friendship… But at the same time, she didn’t want to make Cyrus uncomfortable. She liked her too much to rush into things.

“So,” she said, her voice bright and easy, “do you play?”

Cyrus barked an incredulous laugh. “Basketball? Definitely not. I don’t even know what you guys are doing half the time.”

“Maybe I could teach you sometime?”

Cyrus smiled. “I’d like that.”

The softness in her eyes filled TJ with a shaky confidence. “You know,” she said, shyly scuffing her shoes against the floor, “now I know Buffy isn’t your girlfriend, I don’t actually hate her so much.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, if you and Buffy were friends, we could all hang out together.” Cyrus batted her eyelashes, feigning innocence. “We could get to know each other better.”

TJ swallowed thickly. “Th-That would be great! I mean, I obviously need to apologise to Buffy anyway, but getting to spend more time with you makes the whole idea seem a little less traumatising.” She flushed, suddenly realising what she’d said. “Sorry, that was really forward. I didn’t mean –”

“It’s fine,” Cyrus said, taking a step closer. “I don’t mind you being forward.”

Before TJ could respond, Buffy poked her head through the doors and shouted Cyrus’ name, her eyes turning sharp as they landed on TJ.

“What’s going on in here?”

Cyrus gave her a placating smile. “Calm down, Buffy. Everything’s okay.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes,” Cyrus insisted. “Can you give us a minute?”

Buffy narrowed her eyes, but didn’t protest. “I’ll be outside.”

Once Buffy was gone, TJ felt her muscles slumping in relief. It was much easier being around Cyrus when it was just the two of them. Maybe Buffy wouldn’t be so intimidating after she’d apologised to her.

“Sorry about that,” Cyrus said. “She can be a little overprotective sometimes.”

TJ shrugged. “Well, I haven’t exactly given her the best impression. I don’t blame her for being wary of me.”

“You’re not as bad as you pretend to be.”

TJ managed a smile, her heart stuttering as Cyrus leaned forward and pressed a kiss against her cheek. It only lasted a second – so quick, she might’ve imagined it – but the ghost of Cyrus’ lips tingled against her skin, like the smoke rising from a dead flame. She wanted to reignite the fire, to grab Cyrus’ face and crush their mouths together, but the other girl was already walking away, a knowing smirk dancing on her lips.

“I’ll see you around,” she said, giving TJ a small wave before slipping through the double doors and disappearing.

TJ touched her cheek in awe, still staring at the spot where Cyrus had been standing just a few moments ago. She smiled at the memory of Cyrus’ touch, and wondered when she’d be able to feel it again. She craved it. Just a few seconds with Cyrus, and she was addicted to her presence, completely enamoured with her kind heart and dorky personality. She wanted to get to know her. She wanted to be with her. And, yes, there were plenty of obstacles to pass, and a lengthy list of apologies to make, but Cyrus was more than worth the effort.

“Oh my god,” she whispered to herself. “I think I’m falling in love…“

#tyrus #andi mack #tj kippen #cyrus goodman #amcampaign #amawards #tyrus fics

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pllandcompany · 6 years

Text

Out Loud (Part Two)

Summary: Hospital!AU. The aftermath.

Warnings: talk of gun violence/injuries, mention of blood, mention of medical procedures, life or death situations, mention of anxiety, depression and past suicidal thoughts, mention of past addiction and drug use, flashbacks/PTSD symptoms

Pairings: QPP Moxiety and budding romantic Logince

Tagged: @ziallwarrior @thefallendog @jakesmolbean @a-ghosts @band-be-boss-blog @thecatchat @flyingfreeyt @apologieslogan

Notes: The cliffhanger meets its resolution! (I know, I was evil for that, I’m kind of sorry.) I figured the boys have been tortured enough; let’s let them heal…mostly. The end does get a little intense. Also, I made use of a certain slow-voiced short character....wink wink! As always, please heed the warnings and enjoy!

Roman shifted uncomfortably in the chair across from the therapist’s desk. His bruised ribs were still sore from the surgery to remove the small piece of metal that threatened to take his life. He shifted again, welcoming the pain that came with each movement.

It was a reminder that he won. A reminder that he was still alive.

“Dr. Courtland? Are you all right?” Roman shook his head, the voice jolting him out of his thoughts. “Of course, Nate. I’m here, I’m with you.”

The psychiatrist smiled gently at his colleague. “Now, Dr. Courtland, I know we know each other but you know that here I’m Dr. Christopher,” he intoned in that slow, gentle baritone that seemed to instantly put anyone at ease.

“But that’s such a mouthful,” Roman joked blandly. His affect had been intensely dulled as of late but that didn’t seem to off put the friendly therapist. “Well,” he began, “I suppose we can drop the formality for now. This is our third session. I’m glad you chose to come back in.”

“I’m a neurologist. Of course I value the importance of mental health. And we as a hospital went through a highly traumatic experience so it’s important to talk about how we’re feeling. I fully respect that, Nate.”

Dr. Christopher nodded, slow and thoughtful. “And how are you feeling, Roman? Are you respecting your emotions?”

Roman paused, the question catching him off guard. “I’m definitely feeling. Can’t speak on exactly what judgments I’m making on those feelings though.”

“And what do you feel?”

“Surprised, honestly. After getting the green light here, I was expecting to be antsy about getting fully cleared for surgery but I’m perfectly willing to wait for my physical.” Nate scribbled down a quick note before looking up. “Right, yes, that's the last step for you. Anything else?”

“I’m worried about Logan. Uh, Dr. Taylor, I mean.”

“I understand that you two have been seeing each other lately.” Roman tensed again, wincing when his ribs screamed at him. “Don’t worry, Roman. Patient-doctor confidentiality, remember?”

Roman allowed his features to fall into a gentle smile. “Yeah, we…we have. It’s part of why I’ve kept coming back even after you cleared me. I hoped that if he saw me healing in every sense of the word he’d be…motivated to do the same.”

“Do you think he’s not healing?

“He’s certainly not talking about it! To me, to anyone.”

“Well, he’s not known to be overly public about much of anything. Maybe he’s just the type that heals privately?”

“I’d be inclined to agree with you but he also won’t let anyone clear him for surgery. He just hides in the skills lab all day until his shift is done, maybe he’ll come out for a consult.” Roman sounded slightly panicked now. The astute therapist quickly sensed his distress and signaled him to breathe which Roman complied with willingly. Non-verbal communication of self-care seemed to work best with the neurosurgeon as verbal orders occasionally made him feel patronized. Nate had learned this the hard way in session one and since then they developed a system of sorts that helped Roman to manage his rapidly shifting emotions. Taking his cue from Roman, Nate continued to speak. “I understand your concern. And yes, it does worry me that he’s refusing to operate but as hard as it is, you have to focus on you even when someone you love is hurting. Heal yourself first then you can help him. So I’ll ask again: How are you feeling?”

Roman swallowed thickly, nerves coiling in his belly. He couldn’t avoid the question now, it was too direct. He cleared his throat and shifted once again, the pain jolting through him like lightning. “How do I feel, Nate? I…I’m terrified…all of the time. Someone moves too fast next to me and I jump out my skin. Yesterday, Virgil dropped a chart and I hit the floor. I walk into a patient’s room and if I see their family there, my heart starts pounding out of my chest because I’m afraid to make even the slightest mistake in front of them lest they suddenly pull out a gun. I am a surgeon, I am supposed to be composed and-and strong and dependable but lately I am just…scared. So tell me, Nate,” he leaned in glaring at the therapist, “how do I fix that?” Nate leaned in, clasping both hands in front of him, a sign that he was considering his words carefully.

“It takes time but the first step to healing? You name it. You call the demon by its name. And Roman? You just did that.”

Roman slowly sat back, his glare fading into something much gentler, a fragile and silent hope blossoming in his heart for the first time in weeks.

****

“Virgil Davidson? Patton Parker?” The two doctors’ heads swiveled around in unison, causing Dr. Christopher to chuckle. They walked in hands intertwined, a symbol of both their combined trust and trepidation of this upcoming session. Nate gestured for the two to sit which they did while still conjoined, an action unmissed by the observant doctor. “Well, doctors, it’s good to see you both here.”

Patton chimed in first. “Um, not that I’m complaining but why are we both here? Virgil wouldn’t say much about it.”

Nate smiled reassuringly. “May I?” he asked, indicating towards Virgil who nodded, slow and small. “Well, Dr. Parker, in our last session Dr. Davidson expressed that there is something he’s wanted to ask you for a while but he hasn’t known how to articulate it. I suggested he bring you here to a safe space where we could work through any potential issues that arose.”

Patton turned to look at Virgil, concern and hurt etched into his brow. “Virgil…you know you can talk to me about anything. Not that I mind being here but you don’t have to bring me to therapy to confront me.”

“Is there something you’re concerned would come up in therapy? Something you may not want to confront?” Nate read between the lines of Patton’s reassurance like a book. Patton froze momentarily before breaking into a brilliant grin. “No, of course not! I’m an open book, Dr. Chris.” Nate nodded his face impassive while he notated the stilted manner of Patton’s speech. “Dr. Davidson, whenever you’re ready.”

Virgil took several calming breaths before he actually opened his mouth. “Pat…I wanted to ask you…if you were okay after…you know, after everything that’s happened.” Patton scrunched up his face in confusion. “Of course I am, Virge. You know that. You see me every day.”

“I know but…I’m worried. We haven’t slept with the light off since-“

“I know, Virgil.” Patton sounded suddenly defensive. Nate noted that he had dropped Virgil’s hand. “You know where I was.”

“I do, Patton. But…do you know who you are?”

“What? Virgil, you’re not making sense.” Patton was shaking his leg now, a rare signal of anxiety creeping in.

“Just hear me out, Pat. You delivered a baby by the light of a cellphone. You developed a system of silent communication on the fly. You calmed a panicking resident and saved the lives of everyone in that room. By all accounts, you are a hero. But the way you’ve been acting when you think no one’s looking…it makes me wonder if you think anything of yourself at all.”

The bouncing ceased to a halt. “I…I don’t know what to say, Virgil. I’m sorry.”

Virgil shook his head forcefully. “You don’t have to apologize. Just listen. You told me something afterwards. When that…man banged on the door to your room, you said that there was a point where you thought you would have to give yourself up.”

“Stop it, I don’t want to talk about that.” Virgil looked over at Nate in panic but the therapist simply nodded calmly to keep going. He then grounded himself once more and started again. "Pat, just hear me out, please. I only bring it up because I'm scared of how easily you could even consider giving up your life. I mean, did you even think of me?"

Patton's head turned back to the younger man on a swivel. "How could you say something like that? Of course I thought of you. Every second I thought of you. It would not have been an easy choice to make."

"But before-"

"That's not what this is about." Patton turned to Dr. Chris who seemed to be asking a silent question. "Dr. Chris, Virgil is referencing my first couple of years in med school. I struggled with depression and had some...scary thoughts. Never attempted anything and with help, I pulled myself out of it. That dark period...shaped me into the doctor that I am today. It made me value human life so much more, including my own. So no, Virgil, on this one, you're wrong. It's not that."

"Then what is it, Pat?!" The words exploded out of him before he could refine into something gentler. "I mean...I know it's something. You've held me together these past few weeks, sat with me through countless nightmares and anxiety attacks. But anytime I try to do the same for you or talk about what happened, you shut down and pretend that everything is fine when it's not. So please, talk to me. Why are you running from this?"

"Because I don't know how to do this, Virgil!" Patton shouted.

"Do what, Pat?"

"Any of this! I mean, depression I get but this...this fear? This anger, I do not understand how to deal with it at all." Nate perked up at the last thing Patton said. "Talk to me about the anger, Dr. Parker. Tell me the truth of what you're feeling."

There was a long, pregnant pause before the fetal surgeon started again, his voice raising with every word he spoke. "I...am angry for Melody! This was her first child, one she finally got to have after years of sacrificing her desires for her career. It was supposed to be one of the best times of her life but instead she now has this permanent and horrifying memory. I'm angry that her baby was born into violence when they should have been born into a world that's safe for them. I'm angry that some...person with an axe to grind decided to take the lives of thirteen of our friends and colleagues and leave the rest of us terrified for our lives! I'm angry that I'm so scared that I can't sleep without the lights on, that Virgil can't make it through the night without a nightmare, that Roman got shot and almost died, that Logan...I just...I hate what that man has done to our family! I hate him! And I hate myself for becoming the kind of person that hates people but I do and it makes me sick so I don't talk about it. I'm supposed to be grateful. I'm supposed appreciate human life but his life? The shooter? Well...I'm glad he's dead." Patton looked physically ill at that last admission. He turned to Virgil with a look of defeat on his face. "There. I said it. Happy now?"

Virgil sighed, actually looking relieved. He cuddled Patton's cheekbone with his hand and wiped his thumb across his lower eyelid. "Oh thank God," he breathed, "you're finally crying." Patton blinked a few times before he realized the magnitude of what he'd been holding in and finally chose to let go. Nate quickly conjured a box of tissues from the desk behind him and waited for the two doctors to compose themselves. "Damn it Virge," Patton chuckled through his tears, "you're brilliant, you know that?" Virgil shifted uncomfortably. It didn't go unnoticed by Patton. "Honey...were we maybe projecting when you said I didn't think much of myself?" Silence. "Virgil..you helped save Roman as much as Logan did, you know. You kept him alive and safe until he got there. You're a hero too."

"But if I had been able to help him more, Logan wouldn't have had to come at all and he wouldn't have had to go through-"

"Stop." Patton cradled Virgil's face in his hands. "What happened to Logan is not your fault. It is that man's fault. You did nothing wrong. You did everything you could and Roman is so grateful to you for it. You are good, Virge. You're so good. Believe me when I say that, okay?" Virgil nodded, blinking his own tears. Nate chuckled, drawing the attention of both doctors. "Well, you two are so good together, it seems like you hardly need me."

That day, both doctors walked with yellow slips marked with a "cleared" stamp.

****

In hindsight, maybe directly after a shooting wasn't the best time to start a relationship. Roman hadn't been able to resist the raven-haired surgeon who had been by his side since he operated on him, hoping beyond hope for him to wake up. When his eyes finally met with Logan's gaze of tearful relief, the sight broke Roman's defenses down and he'd ended up confessing the depth of his feelings right then and there. He would never forget Logan's earnest reply before the soft, passionate kiss they'd shared: "I don't ever want to be without you." It was the romantic's ultimate dream fulfilled, a beautiful moment born out of such unspeakable tragedy.

Such a shame that honeymoons always have to end.

Roman hadn't anticipated just how unspeakable their shared tragedy had become for his lover. He walked into the foyer of Logan's apartment, greeted by the same heavy silence that had prevailed over these past few weeks. "Logan?" He entered the bedroom to find the cardiologist still under his comforter with his back towards the door, obviously not having moved in quite some time. "You didn't go into work today." A statement, not a question. "I had no consults today. Didn't see much of a point." The monotone response only served to sink Roman's heart further. He sat on the opposite side of the bed from Logan, fighting the urge to deflate and join him. No, he would not sink into the encroaching darkness. He was going to help pull Logan out of it. "I had my physical today. I'm officially fully cleared for surgery.

Silence. Overwhelming silence.

Roman cleared his throat, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'm scared to operate too. But we have to try. It's who we are."

"Thirteen people." It was barely audible but Roman caught it instantly. "Logan..."

"Thirteen people are dead because of the last time I operated."

"The last time you operated, one person lived." Roman was fighting back anger now; it wasn't fair for Logan to hurt like this. To hurt so much he couldn't see the good anymore. "You are not a killer. The man who shot those people is the murderer, not you."

"His name," Logan said listlessly, shifting to get up and walk to the bathroom, "is David Bacall." The door closed with such a finality that Roman barely fought the urge to scream. Instead, he sat there helpless, choking on the thickness of his inability to help console his partner. "I'll make us dinner," he said to no one in particular, leaving the room just as empty as he felt inside.

Once Logan entered the bathroom, he braced himself on the sink as the flashbacks began. He looked in the mirror at hollow eyes and sunken cheeks that morphed into the stone faced features of David Bacall in the background, a cold metal gun so close to his face his eyes crossed slightly to focus on the end of it.

"Mr. Bacall. You don't have to do this."

"I didn't want to do this. I came here for two people, not over a dozen. But it was brought to my attention that your beloved Chief Thomas was away on conference and I got...angry."

"Killing people doesn't solve anything. It doesn't help the anger. And it doesn't bring your wife back."

"YOU WOULD KNOW, WOULDN'T YOU?!" He shook the gun wildly, sending Logan's body into internal convulsions from the fear. His face didn't betray him, though, he remained visibly calm and collected. He had to if he had any shot of diffusing the situation. "I am not a killer," he whispered, "I am a doctor. I work to save lives, not end them."

"Oh really? And I quote. '33 year old Lauren Bacall came into Sanders-Stokes Memorial presenting with cardiac symptoms due to a complication from a heart defect. Protocol indicated a long but mostly effective procedure which I initially determined as the surgical plan. However, the chief of surgery took an interest in the case. Upon further research, he found a new protocol being tested at Baylor for the same defect. Recovery and operating times were shorter but the procedure was more complex and risky. The chief strongly recommended that I do the new procedure as he believed it was in favor of the patient. I agreed and adjusted my plan accordingly. Unfortunately, upon attempting the new protocol, the patient became unstable and subsquently died from cardiac failure.' That's exactly what you said at the deposition. And those sharks sided with you. But that's not the whole story, is it? You didn't tell them how you had reservations about the surgery, how you and Chief Thomas fought in your office over it."

"You shouldn't have overheard that."

"Admit it, Dr. Taylor. You didn't want to do the procedure."

"I agreed-"

"Against your better judgment, you chose to the procedure that killed my wife! And now you're responsible for all of this! Admit it! You did this! ADMIT IT! NOW!"

"I am not responsible-"

"YES! YOU ARE! YOU HAD A CHOICE AND YOU CHOSE WRONG! ADMIT IT!"

Logan couldn't find the words over the deafening sound of the safety clicking. Bacall's hands shook violently and Logan couldn't tell if it was from fear or determination. The tears choking his tone indicated both.

"You...killed my wife. Your hands...murdered her."

"No," Logan said weakly. "Her heart was too weak. She could have died regardless of what I did-"

"DON'T YOU DARE BLAME HER FOR THIS! YOU KILLED HER!" Bacall panted, breaths rushing from his lips like an angry dragon. Tears and sweat mixed together and ran down his face. He was unraveling; Logan knew it was any minute now before he snapped completely. Without warning, Bacall's face twisted into a sinister sneer, a look that unnerved Logan to his core. "Dr. Taylor...do you know else you've killed?"

"I have not killed anyone-"

"The thirteen people that were shot here today. You wanna know how you killed them? You see, the day my wife died...I died too. I stopped living. I stopped breathing. I became a shell and the only thing I could focus on was making things right. I had one mission: evening the score. Taking out the people responsible for the death of the best thing that ever happened to me. But there were so many...obstacles and I was so...angry because I couldn't find either one of you...until now. And now I have you right where I want you." Bacall calmly lifted the gun that was wildly gesticulating seconds prior, his grip steady and his aim true. Logan closed his eyes, acceptance breaking his heart into pieces. "So this...this is for Lauren."

A shot rang out in the air and Logan felt something warm spray across his face. He couldn't bear to open his eyes and see the damage Bacall had inflicted. Instead he sensed desperately for the blinding pain at the point of entry. Maybe he didn't fatally wound him, maybe he could get to Virgil...the pain never came. Was he already...no, that's his heartbeat, he's still alive. But why?

"Sir. Sir, are you all right?" Who was that? "Sir, are you hurt? We have to evacuate this part of the building, can you walk or do you need assistance?" Police. He was surrounded by police. He was alive. But why? And who's blood...? He slowly opened his eyes. Bacall's.

"Sir, can you walk? We have to move." Logan stammered before he finally found his voice. "N-no, I can't leave! My coworker is very hurt and I'm the only surgeon on the unit who can save him!"

"You know where he is? I'll escort you to him." Logan nodded and began running in the direction towards Roman, trying to shut out the sight of Bacall's lifeless body as he stepped over the growing pool of blood...

He blinked twice and was back in the bathroom. He touched his face, expecting his fingers to come away bloody. Instead, he found tears that turned into quiet, painful sobs, suppressing the sound with sternum-crushing force. The guilt swiftly stole his voice while the never-ending questions pounded against his brain, demanding answers. Why did he survive? Why didn't Bacall just shoot him? Why didn't he just do the other procedure? Why did he let the chief talk him into the risky surgery? Thirteen people would maybe still be alive if he had any sort of a spine and defended his plan. Thirteen people are dead because of him. He was responsible, he was guilty, guilty, guilty, guilty-

He couldn't take it anymore.

Frantically, Logan swung open the bottom cabinet and searched at the back of his cleaning supplies, finally producing a bottle of pills. He stared at the medicine for a indefinite amount of time, the inner debate growing inside his brain. Sacrificing years of sobriety for temporary relief from pain wasn't worth it. It wouldn't solve anything. He knew this all too well.

It didn't stop him from pouring three pills onto his hand and swallowing them whole.

#sanders sides #ss surgeon au #moxiety #logince #logan sanders #roman sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #angst #tw:/addiction #tw:/violence #my writing #sanders sides surgeon au

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missneko-otaku · 6 years

Text

Writer’s note: I haven’t done some writing for a while because of some other things...(tho I think 75% of it are due to my TOO MUCH playing of slbp and love365 XD..yeah this is bad...(T▽T) ) Anyway, I am glad now that I did! Ohmy~ the feeling when I finally able to write all these stuffs/fantasies that is playing nonstop inside my head, be able to just write it all and finally put it in my blog 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ is just pure bliss..! I feel somewhat accomplished too (`•ω•´๑)✧✧ Omyy..I really do like to write..(˶◕‿◕˶✿) I hope to improve more and write more~ (tho, I have to admit, Yasumasa’s fic is taking me longer to write, because Kiyohiro and some other NPC characters too keep on popping in my head, vying for my attention to write theirs as well...gosh this would be a problem especially that my English grammar isn’t that great.. oh well.. hahah XD) Well, I do hope am able to grasp Kiyohiro’s personality here..(*・`v・) He’s one of my favorite NPC too! My goshh, ahh..just thinking him gives me happiness hahaha~

tagging sensei, @ieyasu-tacogawa and friend @shiranata . Also my dear sisters (◕ᴗ◕✿) @bmp-slbp-matchup @af-fection @miminorenai @sagaralisa

( I don’t know why but for some reason, I feel REALLY shy tagging someone...(／≧ω＼)✧ .~)

Kiyohiro

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Blushing in the Shadows (MC x Kiyohiro) (one shot)

________________________________________________________________

Quiet.

That’s all the word I can think of, the only word I could come up with, his very definition, the one that suits him, defines him best, the very word that always seems to appear first thing in my mind whenever I see him.

He doesn’t talk that much unless necessary. Doesn’t even show the slightest faint of expression. Never did I chance upon him laughing nor even a smile showed up on his face. Always and impressively deadpan, no hint of anything..eyes always vacant, like he’s thoughts are in the other world. He’s like a mystery to me. A puzzle I don’t know how to put together.

He’s someone that sometimes, I’m not sure how to keep going a conversation with or let alone, start a conversation. Because every time I try so, in the middle or almost like in just a few blink of our eyes, our talk always comes in halt before I know it.

Yet.

And yet, here I am standing. Eyes, unconsciously, fixated on the man who barely speaks (well, at least he greets me in the hallways) as he passes by in the veranda where I am out in the warm sunshine hanging the laundry. My gaze, so strong and long, eyes burning holes in the back of his lean but slightly wide muscular body. I stand here basking in the warmth of the morning sunshine and silence, eyes still following him until he disappears in the corner of the corridor. I snap back to reality once he’s nowhere to be seen.

“..!! “ (*slap sound)

“Get to work..! MC, get to work!” I declare to myself, my face stings from the slap of my both hands.

I finish what I am doing right away and head to the kitchen to prepare our lunch.

***

Afternoon.

Almost all the food in the trays have gone now. Finished as they are with their food, I, with a couple of ladies, start to collect their meal trays, stacking them all neatly on our arms. Then after removing all of the trays, we serve them hot tea and leave them again in the main hall. I can hear the loud chit-chats of the retainers as I close gently the sliding doors behind them.

As I am about to stand from the spot where I am kneeling, I notice Kiyohiro clad in his usual black hakama striding in light, soundless steps towards me.

“Oh..! Kiyohiro?” I say with a little start in front of him, still kneeling.

His face unreadable. As always, he is quiet, not talking or anything. Just staring at me.

Finally on my feet, I talk to him. I look at him in the eyes desperately trying to hide the unusual nervousness creeping in me-- tho my fingers betray me, fiddling the edges of my kimono. For some reason, I feel shy in front of him, especially when he looks at me in the eye like that.

“Kiyohiro, where have you been? I didn’t see you inside since earlier. Did you have lunch already?” I ask, trying to sound like my usual self.

“No. I still haven’t, miss.” A laconic response in his usual monotone voice that I now have become accustomed or more of like have taken a liking to.

“Hmm..?” I say tilting my head a bit in a surprise, wondering at his few words. “You mean you still haven’t eaten anything yet..?” I ask again just to be sure.

“Right, miss.” he says flatly to me. Expression still unchanging.

“Y-You m-mean that you are here...and just about to eat your lunch??” my voice a bit rising with disbelief. But we already served their meals..! DO we still have some leftovers..!!? I start to panic inside my head

As if sensing something, he’s the first to break the silence, this time, he’s now the one who’s asking first. “Yes, miss. Why?” he asks in a still calm manner.

“They are all already finished eating! We just collected their trays..!” I realize that my voice is a bit loud right now as I talk to him. Well, really, who would not? I mean, doesn’t he look around at his surroundings? It’s past lunch already..! And damn he’s a ninja mind you! How would he miss this kind of simple thing??!

As I dwell with my own thoughts with disbelief, for the first time, I noticed a very slight change from Kiyohiro’s facial expression. His eyes widened a bit, his lips opens partly as if to say something but nothing comes out of it as he decided not to continue it anymore. Perhaps in his mind, saying something would not change anything. So why bother? Then in a brief, very brief moment, his facial expression returns in its usual impassiveness.

“Is that so, miss. Then..” he slightly nods as if nothing, then starts to leave.

Huh..? HUHH??

“Wait..! Kiyohiro!” I call to him as I frantically try to catch up with his walking. And soon as I am just beside him, I grab his arm unconsciously, “You sure do walk fast.” I let out a small sigh.. “Umm.. if you want, I could make something for you but I’ll have to finish cleaning first. Umm..if you can wait..? Is that okay with you..?” I ask.

He looks at me with a faint of surprised in his eyes, then he gives me a side-look glance as if pondering a bit about it.

“...I-- (*grumbles..)” As he is about to speak, the small growl on his stomach cuts him off, leaving him and I a bit lost for words at the moment. Then Kiyohiro, with a slight bashful look-- that I chance upon to see-- says“...then, thank you miss.”

Eyes still locked in his bashful state that is a rarity itself, I reply in a kind of a dreamy tone, “Um..Yeah. Okay..”

We just stand there, not moving until,

“...umm, miss?”

“Hm..?” I tilt my head, my mind in a trance at his handsomeness and at his current bashful state. Kiyohiro is really such a beautiful person. Especially, up-close.

He looks at me, then at his arm, “Um..your hand, miss.” he says. Soon I realize that I am still holding him.

“I-I am sso-so--rry..!” I let go of his arm quickly. A blush creeps on my face right away.

“I-- umm.. please wait for me in the veranda. I-I’ll go and prepare your lunch.” Flustering and in a hurried manner, I stride the hallway-- leaving him behind.

***

After cleaning everything swiftly, I hurry, preparing his late lunch. Fortunately, there is still some leftover rice and some soup. Still looking for something more for him to eat, I find some pickled plums in a jar and some eggs too. I start making him an onigiri filled with plums, reheat the leftover soup, and boil him two eggs. It takes me just a few minutes to complete preparing everything.

“Sigh. At least I managed to make something decent for him.” I say as I stride towards the veranda, feeling somewhat satisfied with the simple food I easily managed to make for him.

I arrive in the veranda and find Kiyohiro sitting quietly as ever while he stares at the garden-- made even more beautiful by the little flower buds poking from its bushes that seems like it will bloom anytime soon. I sit beside him, and place the tray in beside him, the hot soup still steaming from its bowl.

“Here. Almost all the dishes from earlier were gone, so this is all I could manage to make. I hope this is okay with you. If not, I could make some more onigiri at least and filled it with something else aside pickled plums.”

“No. This is enough. Thank you, miss.” he says and starts to sip the hot soup. After that, without much change in expression, his fingers soon find the onigiri and take a silent, almost inaudible bite of the triangular thing. He quietly munches it in the most simple yet graceful manner that I began to feel embarrassed about how I just usually eat. He eats neatly. More neatly than me.

I stare at him, my eyes feasting with the silent beauty in front of me. I still can’t help but wonder what made me attracted to him aside that he’s beautiful. All I remember is that he’s just polite to me. He greets me in the hallways whenever we run into each other with ‘good day, miss’ and nothing more.

Yeah, come to think of it, nothing more than that really.

“Sigh.. I don’t understand myself.” I blurt out aloud without thinking.

“What you don’t understand, miss?” Kiyohiro asks as he put down his chopsticks on the tray. His food now gone. He finished everything, it seems.

“Oh..! haha nothing..” I laugh it off.

“I see..” he says.

Then an awkward silence fills us.

Oh no, this again.. What to talk? MC, what to talk about..? Come on. Ugh, think..!

As I try to make an effort to come up with a nice subject that would make our conversation continue longer, he suddenly rises, tray both in his hands. Reflexively, I also rise from my sitting.

“Um..where are you going with that?”

“I am finished. Thank you for the meal, miss. I will bring this to the kitchen by myself.” Kiyohiro states as he starts to walk towards the direction where the kitchen is.

“N--no, no.. Let me do it. It’s okay.”

I insist as I try to get the tray from him but in vain. For some reason, he is determined to do it. I feel that he is holding it with a bit of strength that if I still insisted to go my way, I'm afraid that I would just make an accident, making the empty dishes flying if I force to take it from him.

As if he figures what I am thinking, Kiyohiro with his usual side-look, suddenly speaks up, our hands both still holding the tray.

“...I..well, if you insist this too, ...then thank you again miss. The meal was good.” he pushes the tray to me lightly and start to walk leaving me just like that.

Huhh? HUHH?? He left me again…just like that.

I feel the disappointment crushes me as I look at his back profile that is walking away from me.

Ohh, well... at least he said it was good.

He said it was good..wait, good..?!

A bit stunned there on the spot, the word ‘good’ keeps on repeating in my head. The fact that Kiyohiro said something more, is very rare that I find myself grinning alone. He rarely give me compliments whenever he eats my cooking. Even to others too. And he usually say things in a matter-of-fact way.

“He said it was good...good..” I murmur, a light fluffy and happy feeling spreading within me.

***

Late night it is.

Finally, I’m done with the dishes and all in the kitchen. The other ladies already have gone to bed by now after they are finished with their cleaning in the main hall. The usual dinner took a bit longer to end than we expected because of the sudden urge of the retainers to have a little merry drink before retiring to their chambers. From what I heard, it seems that something good happened today regarding about the ally thing with lord Nobunaga.

Before leaving the kitchen, I check again everything well, the cooking utensils and our stocks. When I am sure that everything is good, I stride my way to the veranda before going straight to my chamber. Quiet and breezy as it is, I just want to take a short rest outside first and admire the peace and beauty of the glittering night sky. But as I arrive in the veranda, there is someone who got there already and took my favorite spot. I stop for a moment and take a look at who it is. A figure comes into sight. Being illuminated by the moonlight, sitting there is a familiar figure clad in its usual dark hakama, its beautiful dark hair swept into a side ponytail fashion-- funny, for I envy the color of his hair, dark and shiny, very black. More beautiful and glossy unlike mine.

Before I even get near to him, he notices my presence.

“Miss?” he says, like he is wondering why I am still out and awake.

Come to think of it, it is unusual for me to bump into him at this time of night.

Surprised and curious like him, I ask too while I sit just beside him. Just a palm-length distance between us.

“I didn’t expect to see someone here. Can’t sleep?” I say.

I look up at the night sky above us, eagerly waiting for him to respond.

“...I,”

The moment I hear it, his faint voice, I look at him right away with my full attention.

“Hm?” I say tilting my head, waiting to complete his sentence.

“...maybe.” he says almost like a whisper to my ear. “How about you miss, why are you still awake?”

“Me? I just finished my chores. Sometimes when I finish late, I come here to take a rest and admire the night sky. Whenever I do, I feel like all the fatigue of the day seems to go away. I feel calm and at peace.” I say, feeling shy all at the same time. The way he listens to me with attention as well and the way his eyes gaze at me as if in a ponder sends butterflies in my stomach. I try to collect myself.

“...I see.” he says.

Again. This again. Silence appears to be trying to consume us. Both of us not talking, just staring at the sky above us. Only the murmurs of the night insects give life to this hushed moment. As we sit here, wordless, I can’t help but steal glances at his side. The longer this moment-- of us being alone-- stays, the stronger my desire becomes, that I wish for this to just drag forever. I wonder if he at least feels something being with me, alone, even just a slight bit.

“...”

As I am about to steal another glance of him, I suddenly freeze. He is looking at my side, quietly he says, “Is there something wrong, miss?”

“!”

“....you keep on glancing here. I, I just wonder if there’s something wrong..” he calmly says, his eyes drifting from me then back to the garden.

He noticed!

I don’t know how to react. My face turning into a slight blush, like a just ripened tomato.

I feel embarrassed. I put my palms on my reddened cheeks to make myself relax, though apparently it isn’t working.

“Nothing. I-I just..umm..haha..” the only words I manage to say for I nervously can’t think of anything.

Palms still cupped on my face, Kiyohiro suddenly looks surprised as he observes me.. Ughh..now I am weirding him out. Just great. This is not the kind of impression I want him to have of me.. Get it together, MC! Please!

As I fluster and think of this, I am caught off guard by Kiyohiro. My body stiffens, eyes locked to his dark purple eyes as he suddenly reaches out to me and brush his fingertips at my cheeks.

“.....”

Time seems to have stopped at this very moment, like everything seems to move slowly as his fingertips touches me, his eyes languidly observing me. The nervousness and embarrassment have gone but only to be replaced by something worse-- the loud hammering of my heart. I feel as if my chest is about to burst, my heart like it is about to get ripped by some odd strong feelings..yet it excites me at the same time.

After a brief careful observation that seems like an eternity to me already, he removes his fingertips from me.. And with that same old, side-glance expression he always put on whenever he’s thinking, he speaks to me-- a hint of concern present on his voice.

“...are you..perhaps, sick miss? You look kind of red and hot right now.” he says

My eyes widen just hearing the word ‘hot’ from his lips. Though I know that he only meant that my skin feels a bit unusually warm, I can’t help but blush more from it. The hands that is cupping my hot cheeks, unconsciously find their way pressing my chest. I can feel on my palms the abnormal beating of my heart.

Kiyohiro on the other hand, suddenly stands up in front of me, towering me with his beautiful presence.

“I think it is very late already miss, let me take you to your chamber.” He says, offering a hand for me to hold which I nervously grasp as I try to stand up too. I feel happy at this moment, being able to hold his hand even though it meant nothing that much to him.

But soon that I have to remove my clasp on his, I feel my mood sinking a little bit. I wish to hold his hand longer. Instead I grasp the side of my kimono as I am on my feet now, trying to resist the urge to hold him more.

“Is this the direction to your room?” Kiyohiro asks. I just nod hiding all at the same time the blush and disappointment still evident on my face.

***

Side by side, we walk. I wish I could say something to break the silence around us. But honestly, I don’t mind the quietness that much now for I feel happy enough that we are together, walking like this. I think this is maybe the longest time that I am together with him. I glance at him, at his profile. Even here in these dark hallways only illuminated by the moonlight, his features shines. I ponder to myself again, what I really did like about him. Other than the fact that he is handsome and polite, I remember the words that Master Hanzo usually tells about Kiyohiro. I agree that he’s too flat, being inexpressive, quiet and all... to the point of being dull, and yes, uninteresting.. But perhaps these little things about him... maybe these have become the sole reasons why I am so captivated by him now. Like a spell bound to capture me.

As we walk in the hallways, my desires bit by bit grows. I hope now that something more happens, something that will make us become closer...But, as I look at him, walking like this beside me, I just let myself enjoy the moment and be happy and content with this. At least, even just a little, there’s a slight development between us..well, I do hope so.

We arrive in my chamber after some time. The moonlight casts our shadows in the hallway, almost touching each other. We just stand there for a moment before Kiyohiro finally speaks.

“...Thank you.” He says, glancing a side-look again.

“Hmm? For what?” I ask.

He looks at me again, with his deep purple eyes that seems to soften as he speaks. Somehow, I don’t know if it’s just me but it feels like he’s slightly embarrassed. “For the meal earlier. I really didn’t mean to bother you with that, miss.”

“Oh..that! It’s okay. You didn’t bother me or anything.” I assure him as I unconsciously flash a bright smile to him.

Still looking at each other, I notice his soft expression suddenly changes into a determined one. His nice brows turn in a very little slight furrow as he says, “I’ll make sure to be on time, miss. I won’t be late like that again next time.” He says in a serious kind of low tone that I can somehow feel his resolved exuding from his words.

I can’t help but stifle a giggle. The way he’s so serious about it. About promising me that he won’t be late next time for lunch is very....him. Very, Kiyohiro. I don’t know if it is just me but he always takes everything in a serious approach that sometimes I do wonder if he knows how to joke or at least differentiate or identify one.

Still...

Ahh.. He’s so adorable.

I stare at him until my eyes feels a bit satisfied. Bumping with him today, being with him even in just a short time...even though we really didn’t talk that much about anything nor discover something more about him...I still feel so blessed. The fact that my heart is beating hard right now, making me so nervous that he might catch it, just shows and makes me fully aware as well that I like this dull man so much, enough to turn my emotions into a whirlwind.

“Thank you, Kiyohiro.” I blurted out in a whisper.

“Hmm...miss?” he says, confused.

I turn my back at him as I open the sliding door for myself, the pale light of the moon spilling into my dim, gloomy chamber. When I entered, I turn around and peek at him from the sliding door that I am still holding.

“Goodnight.” I say, briefly looking at him in the eye. I still want for us to stay longer like this but I know that it can’t be...and I doubt it as if Kiyohiro feels the same about it. I am not sure myself but maybe he thinks of it, of us being together right now nothing special but more than just a happenstance. But still, I wouldn’t feel mad about it even if he did.

He is still looking at me with that same cannot-be-read expression that he always has. Surprisingly, he says the same thing to me as well, “...you too, miss. Goodnight.”

I look at him again and just smile at him. Then, as I am about to close my door, I almost missed that little faint smile on his lips that he managed to bring out from himself. That fleeting smile of his makes me pause from closing the door. I stand there in a bit of surprise and fascination. Kiyohiro must be surprised too of my sudden reaction because I can see his eyes widen slightly as he looks at me in a way like he’s wondering what happened or why I stopped.

“...miss?” he says in a faint voice.

Though faint, his voice brought me back to reality in an instant. I shake my head a bit and just closed the door right away without even replying to Kiyohiro’s concern.

Doors closed, yet I am not moving from my very spot, and neither him. I can hear my heart loudly beating like crazy. In front of me, I can see Kiyohiro’s calm silhouette on the wooden frame of the sliding door just standing there. I can’t help but feel a bit cheated for I am the only one here, in turmoil.

“...”

Then, something happened to me… as he is about to walk away from my chamber. Like a bewitched maiden enchanted by the moon, I suddenly slide the door open with a slight bang. Kiyohiro stops and his purple eyes looks at me, startled. Without a moment’s hesitation, I’m grabbing his kimono by my both hands and pulling him towards me enough for me to reach him. Standing on tiptoes, I slightly lean towards him and put a peck of a kiss on his right cheek and soon I pull away myself from him.

“Goodnight..!” I say in a hurry as I bow. I can feel myself reddening as it has dawned to me the preposterous act I just did. After that bow, I turn away from him, closing the door behind me as fast as I can. Hurriedly, I throw myself at a corner of my room. I’m slumping myself against the wall, my body sliding down to the tatami floor, palms on my face. Excitement and regret filling my head.

Seven hells..! I must be crazy!!? Why..!!? What in the world..?!

My thoughts in a total clutter as I ask myself over and over why I did such a thing…only to realize later that perhaps that moment because of the moon and everything--making the moment seem romantic-- that I did such foolishness... or perhaps I just wanted to test him, see his heart turn into a frenzy like mine as well.Tho I am not sure if it did work on him.

***

Meanwhile… (in the garden)

Out in the garden, lit by the beautiful, soft light of the night moon, there is Haku, the familiar of Master Hattori-- pale as the moonlight, almost imperceptible-- he is crawling, just came back from a mission assigned to him by its master.

As she continues to crawl in the garden, there she sees Kiyohiro. Though usually, Haku wouldn’t even be bothered by it because it's just Kiyohiro-- the fact though that he happens to see him outside, late at this hour (aside when he has a mission) is something a little bit, tiny new for him.

Haku stops in his tracks. For some reason, the usual tedious and too quiet boy caught his tiny attention. If it wasn’t for he being a familiar, way more intelligent and very perceptible of his surroundings than other regular snakes, he would have probably missed it.

“Hm? What happened. Is he sick..? He looks like someone has slapped him hard on the face. Should I tell this to Masanari? ...Oh well, I shouldn’t bother. He would just make fun of the boy.. And probably he would even bother me with it... Better keep on moving. I badly want to rest now.” the white snake sighs as he continues crawling again, leaving the quiet Kiyohiro alone in his own little world.

Meanwhile…(Kiyohiro sitting in the veranda)

Cheeks, red as a beet-- Kiyohiro is sitting in the veranda where MC and him sat just a little while ago. He’s staring into space. And though quiet he may look, for the first time he’s not thinking straight at all. His feelings in a raw jumble of confusion and excitement that he can’t seem to understand. But one thing he is sure of, he can feel the heat on his cheeks grows as it gets deeper red. Especially, his right cheek where MC planted a brief and sudden kiss that caught him completely off guard. He isn’t expecting anything like that. He never, even once, expected or perhaps it never ever occurred to him that something like that could happen to him. The usual inexpressive and collected ninja of the Tokugawa clan is now feeling flustered for the very first time in a long time.

He touches his right cheek-- the heat is still there-- as he recounts himself of what really happened earlier. His heart, for the first time, too, is in complete disarray. Beating fast like it never did before. Everything feels so new and unfamiliar...yet for some unknown reason he likes it as well. These feelings that overwhelms him right now makes him excited and he can’t really quite figure out why. He stands from his sitting-- his right hand still touching his right cheek-- as he stares at the dimly lit garden before him. His thoughts again, in a repetition of the earlier events that happened between him and MC. He’s feeling guilty and blushing hard in the dark as he unconsciously relishes himself of the images earlier of MC kissing him on the cheek, softly and suddenly.

#slbp #slbp kiyohiro #kiyohiro x mc #slbp mc x kiyohiro #slbp fic #one shot #fanfic #fic

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buckysdamnplums · 6 years

Text

“Oh we all knew.”

Author’s Note: I haven’t written or posted on this blog in forever but I have one other writing here. Also if you like this, please leave feedback or even a request! Maybe I’ll get into writing again, but in the meantime, here’s some fluff.

Summary: You and Peter didn’t really know about your feelings for each other, but all the avengers did... well all except Bucky. And he finds out in a unique way.

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader, Bucky Barnes x platonic!Reader (featuring Tony, Nat, Steve, Clint, and Sam)

Word Count: 1179

Warnings: none, just a protective Bucky and some bad writing!

“Peter!” Your voiced ringed throughout the common room of the Avenger’s compound, catching Nat and Steve’s attention. You continued to scream, running as fast as you could from Peter as he chased you with a small smirk on his face. Weekends at the compound were your favorite, especially since it allowed more time for you and Peter to hang out.

“Watch it Parker. If you or your little girlfriend break anything, you’ll be paying for it!” Tony called out as he entered the room with an apple in hand. Natasha and Steve snickered at the comment, but kept their thoughts to themselves.

Blush started creeping up Peter’s neck as he slowed down his pace, “She’s not my girlfriend... but duly noted Mr. Stark.” You slowed down, taking a seat on the couch behind Peter, a blush finding its way to your cheeks at Peter’s words. A wink from Tony was sent Peter’s way before he dismissed himself from the room, probably leaving to go tinker with toys in his lab.

Peter then made his way towards you on the couch, sitting on the opposite side, furthest away from you. The newly found tension in the air not settling well between the two of you. To be honest, the little remark from Tony shocked you. Yes you may have had a little crush on Peter, but you didn’t think it was obvious enough to pick up on. Besides, Peter was quick to dismiss the idea. Out of the corner of your eye you caught sight of a glare, pulling you from your thoughts. “Bucky!” you exclaimed, getting up from your spot on the couch, making your way over to the super soldier.

“Hey kid, how you doing?” He scooped you up into a hug, lifting you off the ground.

“I’m good, I’m good. Been missing you,” you let out with a small chuckle. Bucky had become a sort of brother you never had but always wanted. It took a while for him to warm up to you, seeing as you were simply the friend of Peter but one day you bonded over the teasing of Steve and Peter. Since then the two of you just clicked, now you’re nearly as inseparable as you and Peter. Nearly.

“Yeah, we’ve missed you around here too, Y/N. Feels like my little bud isn’t around anymore. Makes me wonder if there’s any boys taking up your time, ‘cause I just might have to intervene there.” Buck loved playing the protective role, but you knew he meant well by it.

“Well there’s no boy… at least nothing you should be worrying about,” you nudge him with you shoulder as he pulled you into a side hug. With a smile and wave to Peter, he excused himself to join Steve and Nat at the table they were still sat at.

“Come on Pete, let’s head to the game room.” you offer, walking to where he sat on the couch. Taking his hand, the two of you make your way to the elevator heading to the infamous “Y/N and Peter Floor.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Should we really be watching them through the security cameras, Stark?” Cap pressed as he, Tony, Nat, Sam, and Clint surrounded the monitor which displayed you and Peter playing video games.

“Come on Grandpa, you know the tension between the two kids is nearing it’s wits end.” Tony retaliated.

“He’s right, Steve. You saw how flustered they got earlier when Tony called her his girlfriend. We could be witnessing a blooming relationship in a matter of minutes.” Natasha commented. She was right, you two were in a difficult stage where neither of you had confessed your feelings yet. Even though it was obvious to everyone else. Just then Bucky walked into the room, “Here you all are. I’ve been looki— wait why are you guys watching Y/N and Peter play video games?”

“Shut it Popsicle, we’re waiting to see if Tony’s little comment worked.” Sam said, not looking away from the screen.

“What comment? And what exactly would ‘work’?” He pressed, taking a look at the screen. You had just lunged at Peter, tossing your remote to the ground obviously frustrated at losing another round of Rainbow Road.

“You know, to see if calling Y/N Peter’s girlfriend will spur them into finally telling each other how they feel. It’s been dragging on forever yet just got interesting…” Nat trailed off as you and Peter started play wrestling, falling to the floor.

Bucky felt his overprotective brotherly instinct kick in as he watched, jaw clenched. He glanced around the room taking in the anticipating looks from the fellow Avengers. Turning his attention back to the monitor in front of him, he noticed Peter (pinned by you) mouthing something to you. Silenced filled the room as you started leaning down towards Peter just about to kis—

“HEY WHAT THE HELL?!” Nat and Tony shouted as the screen turned dark.

“Hold up were you guys actually about to watch two kids kiss?” Clint asked, holding the plug from the monitor, shaking his head.

“No…” Tony drawed out, “I just needed proof to show Happy that he now owes me $30.”

“Gross Tony you bet on the kids?” Nat called out, “I just wanted to see my little Y/N have her first kiss with Spiderboy. Sentimental reasons..” A loud slam of the door cut her off as Bucky stormed out of the room, en route towards the game room you and Peter were currently in.

“Plug the screen back in.” Steve instructed Clint.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

You pulled back from Peter with a smile growing on your lips while still trapping him to the floor.

“Wow..” Peter smiled back.

“Yeah..” You licked your lips, suddenly very aware of your current position. You were about to shift off of him when the door flew open.

“Parker. Hallway. Now.” Peter whipped his head around towards the source of the loud stern voice, fear spread across his face as he looked back at you. You propped yourself off of Peter, allowing him to give you one last look for help before following Bucky (who appeared more as the Winter Soldier in this moment) into the hallway.

“So, Peter. You and Y/N, huh?” Bucky asked eyeing the poor boy carefully.

“Uhm.. yes, sir.” He replied, wishing Y/N would intervene. His spider abilities were no use to him now.

“Just know, if you break her heart or even lead me to think you did, you’ll be sorry. Okay?”

“Yes, sir.”

With that, Buck opened the door to the game room giving you a genuine smile, “So doll, when were you gonna tell me about this little crush? I thought we shared everything?”

“Come on Buuuuuck,” you whined, making your way towards the two. “Not even Nat knew.”

“Oh I knew.” Your eyes darted towards the speaker overhead, hearing the red-head’s voice.

“Yeah, we all did.” Sam confirmed.

“But a little show by the Winter Soldier in protective mode was not something we saw coming.”

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