#im living in peaceful bliss where everything is fine

[neutral-party]

i start thinkin abt them too much and suddenly my brain is going 🔁🔁🚨❗️⤴️↩️🚨↪️❗️🚨↕️

(click image for better quality!)

#the owl house #toh #raeda #eda clawthorne #raine whispers #yes i have seen the trailer and i am simply Not Looking at whats going on #im living in peaceful bliss where everything is fine #also rlly feeling this magenta..fuschia colour lately apologies if its rlly loud ahaha #my art

[aloneatpeace]

SHADOW OF THE PAST

Chapter one

┌───── •✧✧• ─────┐

New home

└───── •✧✧• ─────┘

    

.→✒️:★: ͜͡✿͜͡ →. So this is a fic as usual the main protagonist is reader along with Dean Winchester and Sam Winchester from supernatural. There will other characters as well .

Im hoping to write this fic as horror / paranormal au . Hopefully it come together like that .

So that's it enjoy the fic please please tell me what you think and i appreciate every single of you reading my all fics thank you ❤️

                             

           

𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ

The warm sunlight's glade through the open windows curtains as you and you and your love of your life lay peacefully. Never in million year you thought that you will get to live the dream life you always wanted with guy you hopelessly and enormously in love with, an energic dog that always love to steal your attention every time he waltzes in, a peaceful home where you don't have to worry about anything nor your family chewing on every breath you take or friends who always around when they only wanted something. This is all you wanted, needed and dreamed off.

"What is going on that pretty head of yours? "

you heard his in raspy morning voice, The voice that you would love to hear for all eternity. You glanced at him to see his mesmerizing green eyes staring back you.

" Just thinking about how life is awful back then "

You said with laughing following in behind he joins in with you. Seeing the pure happiness on your face making his heart flutters. He could help but put his arms around you and pulled you closer to his side and you both sigh at feeling of being in each other's arms. The pure blissful moment was interpreted when a golden fluffy ball come in between the two of you and made himself home in your chest.

" Sometimes, I wonder if he is trying to steal you from me "

Your husband says and you chuckle and rub your dog's ear.

"Aww but I love you babe, don't worry your still my favorite"

max who probably smarter than average dogs you looked at you with what you assume 'are you serious ' face  at you.

"I'm kidding" you whispered

"I heard that " comes from your husband who getting himself out of the bed and going to bathroom.

"So are you going to work today or are you going help unpack the boxes because there is a lot and i don't want to do it all by myself" the two of you moved in new house for fresh start leaving everything behind and having new start is what you always wanted and luckily your husband also happy about that idea.

" Trust me I don't want leave you alone especially when we are new in this area and doesn't really know how the people in here. But you know I have to go to the station".

It's true after all being with you where he felt more alive and happier and your happiness also what he gives importance to. Starting a relationship with you, falling in love with you, marrying you was the best things that happened to him and he wanted to give you everything and make you smile every day.

" It's okey Dean, I'm so thankful for what you done for me and love you so much "

You said coming behind him wrapping arms around his bare middle.

" I love you too sweetheart, you know I do anything for you my soul "

He turn around to see you lifting your chin up to look at him and he brushes his thump on your lower lip as he leans down to capture your lips in a kiss that rich in love and passion, one that makes your knees weak and heart to rush. his hands moving down your body desperately try get closer to as possible.

tugging on the shirt that he wore last night. his mind racing with last night's memory of how you looked up to him with the needy look on your face as he gives himself to you and how you tasted like fine dessert that still lingering in his tongue every time making him wanting more and take him on another level of ecstasy.

The bliss full moment where neither of you don't want to leave but with Shakey breathe you parts away from him. Before you can speak, he picks you up making you squeak as he continues to move a loud break the two of you as both turn to look at your dog who running towards you. You both look at each before laughing out loud.

"See every time he does this shit, man she is my wife. find someone else"

Dean put his head in neck as you still in his arms as you still laughing.

" Laugh all you want, wait till I get one puppy who loves me and I give all my love and attention to the puppy " he says with a challenging look as he puts you down.

you exit the bathroom to bedroom squeezing your dog in big hug as both make way your way to kitchen.

" Don't burn down the kitchen please we still new " He shouts form bathroom.

" No promise " you say back. You can hear his laugh as you made it to the kitchen.

You look around "That's a lot of boxes "

If your memory was correct, you put some milk and bread in the fridge with couples of things that you don't remember. As you open the fridge you hear sounds of running in living room

"Hey,no running around the room max"you say as you collect the things you need in hands and close the fridge with your foot. As you turn you see max standing in top of one of the boxes in the kitchen his ears sharp staring at living room and starts to bark.

" Hey boy, you want something " He turn to you and come towards you and lay down beside your foot looking up you with round eyes.

You crouch down next to him give him pat on his head.

" How about we have a walk around and how some fun time? How about that" He barks with enthusiasm.

" Good boy " You go back to making breakfast as dean comes wrapping his around your waist giving a kiss on your head.

" You didn't burn down the kitchen woah that's an improvement".

As you open your mouth to defend yourself he cuts you off with kiss" Don't say it's one time it still happened "He starts to take a sip of his coffee and hums.

"Okey I won't, hey I was thinking maybe taking max for a walk get know the place around "you said take a sip of your own coffee.

" Yeah, that good idea, but if you need anything don't hesitate to call okey " he said finishing his own coffee and having some breakfast.

You slap his butt when he gets up "are you assaulting a officer?'" he dramatically gasp at you

"Oh shut, up as if you don't like it "

He shakes his head at you before getting up to leave and as he passes, he rubs max on his back." Hey buddy take care of our girl will ya "and move to the front door.

" Good luck with work I really hope everything will work out I really likes this place" you said following behind him with files on hand.

You hand that him as you reach the front step

" Me too sweetheart, I love you, now give me a good luck kiss" he says pulling you towards him with a smile on his face.

You let out a small giggle and kiss him passionately.

He parts ways from you giving you cheeky wink and get in his car and look back at you mouthing 'I love you ' you repeat the same as drive away.

Both of you not seeing that shadow that watching you form the inside.

You make your way inside the house.Max was biting a box that labeled his name

" alright we unbox some and then we take a walk "a bark was all your answer.

Opening max's box first you give him his toys and move on to next and then to next.

You don't know how many hours passed but you are down to the last box.

You collect the wrapping and torn boxes into a trash bag and walk towards the trash can to dumb it.

"Are you the new resident of this house?" a female voice behind you said. You turn around seeing a woman standing there with a smile on her face.

"Yeah, we just moved here." You tell her feeling her presence only out of pure curiosity

"I'm Amy Peterson, I live down the street with my family. What's your name?"

You tell her your name "well, welcome to our neighborhood. It's a very quiet here but its peaceful. And you don't have worry about noisy neighbor since all the house are in a decent amount of distance"

Nodding your head at the it's also a main reason you and dean decided to move to her. "Yeah, it's nice..." before you can continue max comes running towards you when he saw you chatting with stranger abandoned his toy that he is chewing

You ruffle his hair beside his ears as he stands next you. "Oh, he is beautiful. is it you and this cute alone here?"

You shake your head with a smile on your face "no I'm with my husband."

"you're married, what does he do?" she asks

"Yeah, he is cop" you said proudly

She gives a wide smile "that's wonderful. Good thing now we have cop living here" she laughs. "See you soon, I have to go before my kids flip the house upside down the"

You sigh at her retrieving foam "well good to know we have nice neighbor. Isn't it."

Getting in shower you let the cold water pour down your head and shoulders washing away the soreness. You change into leggings and white sweater combing your hair until you're satisfied with a result. As you promised you took max out for a walk.

                                  

Dean was getting to know his co-workers at the station. He assigned with a man named Castiel. "So how you like in it here?" Castile, ask he shows the towns map and some report files with data of some local criminals. "Too early to answer that" he answers observing the file.

"I suppose it is, but our crime rate not that high aside from some random robberies other than that it's quite peaceful here."

"Yeah, my wife always wanted live in quite nice place" dean said "You have wife huh! Seems like those ladies don't know that yet" castile said making dean look up to see two females smiling at their direction dean and Castiel share a chuckle.

You were watching tv when dean came in, max run towards dean huffing demanding for pets from the man.

"You unpacked everything huh?" dean ask he take off his uniform

You nod without taking your eyes off the tv "yep, and I met one of our neighbors and took max out for a walk"

Finally taking off his uniform he pushes your legs apart and lay between them head laying on your chest you run your fingers through his hair making him groan. "Who is this neighbor?"

"Amy Peterson, just street down. How was your day?"

"It was great, apparently there aren't really much of crime here, so that a good thing. My partner also from here castile, seems like great guy" dean glance up at you with a serene look on his face "seems like everything is in favor, baby" he takes in your peaceful relaxed face, that was gone for a past couple of moths but its back now and he never felt so grateful for that.

Your eyes find his face a large grin on your face so it's transferred to his lips as he pulls himself towards you pressing his full lips on yours slowly knowing that he has all time in the world just savoring the feeling of you. You tilt your head side to get deeper hands gripping each other.

Dean hands grip your hip as he presses himself closer to you to feel you near him as close as possible, his grip get stronger as he starts to tug down the waistband of the leggings something fall down in the hallway.

"Shit something broke?" you get with dean as you both walk towards the hallway, a broken glass from the picture that you hung scattered on the floor.

Max walks towards it but dean held him back not wanting him to get hurt "hey you both stay there. I'll clean it up" he said

"You sure?" you ask he nods at you. Taking max with you, you both returns to couch max lie next you his eyes blinking up to you. You ruffle his hair cuddles to him. 

Series masterlist

#dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean x y/n #dean x you #sam winchester x reader #sam x reader #dean winchester #sam winchester #sam and dean #dean and sam #supernatural #horror au #x reader #cop dean #supernatural au #paranormal au #sam winchester x y/n #sam winchester x you #winchester x reader #the winchester brothers #winchester brothers #winchester boys #Winchester brothers x reader #fan fic #supernatural x reader #dean fanfic #sam fanfiction #sam winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fanfiction

[deancaskiss]

“I’m going outside,” Dean said, dropping a kiss to the top of Cas’ head as he walked past the ex-angel, who was sitting on the couch reading a book.

Cas’ eyes flickered up from the book to Dean’s face, and he smiled softly, tilting his head so Dean could peck him on the lips instead. When Cas pulled back, he took in Dean’s appearance. Red flannel shirt and jeans. He frowned, shifting his weight until he was angled more towards Dean. “You do know it’s snowing outside, right?”

“Mmhmm,” Dean hummed, sliding his fingers into Cas’ hair and slowly letting it glide between his fingertips. “We need some more wood for the fire,” Dean said with a shrug. And then, “I’ve never really been able to enjoy it. The snow, I mean. Even when we were kids we had to spend our time inside motel rooms instead of out in the snow. Just… want to enjoy nature.”

Cas cocked his head to the side, tilting until he could press a kiss to the inside of Dean’s wrist. “Who are you and what have you done with my husband?”

Dean tugged Cas’ hair; not hard, just playfully. “Knock it off. I’ll be back in twenty minutes with more wood,” Dean said, motioning with his free hand to the fireplace, where the fire was slowly dwindling, loud crackles replaced by soft pops as the last of the wood gently burned.

“Take a coat. You’ll get sick,” Cas said, catching Dean’s hand as it slipped from his hair and softly squeezing Dean’s palm.

“My jacket’s all the way upstairs,” Dean said, making a face before giving Cas’ hand a quick squeeze; bending down to grab his boots.

“Dean. Dean,” Cas repeated, soft and urgent. “Jacket. Now. I don’t have powers to heal you if you get sick from the cold.”

Dean stuck out his tongue, dropping another quick kiss onto Cas’ temple before darting to the back door. “I’ll be fine. Love you,” he called, yanking the door open and sucking in a breath as the cold air blasted him. He didn’t wait for Cas’ response, which he knew would either be something exasperated or an ‘I love you, too.’

Instead, he grabbed his axe from where he’d left it on the porch and he trudged into the woods the house was settled into. The snow crunched under his boots, and he sighed in content. It was peaceful. The snow felt good as it slipped down into his hair and clung to his eyelashes.

For a blissful second, he contemplated just sitting and enjoying the gentle snowfall, but they really did need more wood; especially if he wanted cuddles with Cas in front of the fireplace.

Finding his pile of larger wood from the tree he’d chopped down last week, Dean set about to cut some of the larger chunks into smaller logs for the fire, humming under his breath as the snow continued to fall. This right here, this is what retirement was meant to be. It was everything he’d ever wanted and nothing he thought he’d ever deserve. Peace and serenity in the mountains, his husband at his side, still lending a helping hand to the hunter community when need-be.

And with the snow floating down from the sky, Dean knew peace. This is what he’d been hoping for. A white winter. His first time shoveling snow, which had been quite disastrous but still fun, and cutting firewood. Feeling the warmth seep into his bones from the fire after a long day out in the freezing snow. It was good. So good.

Until it wasn’t. One large glob of snow fell from the nearest tree, soaking Dean’s back and trickling down the open collar of his shirt. Shit. Cas had been right. He should have spent the extra two minutes grabbing his jacket. But it was too late now. He was out here, and he was almost done chopping enough wood to last them a couple days.

By the time he was done, he could barely get his fingers to move as he attempted to pick up the logs. Damn. Next time he needed thicker gloves. Heaving the haul back to the back porch felt like a living hell, and when he fumbled his hand on the door handle and the warm air from inside washed over him, he actually let out a quiet cry.

Cas looked up from his book, expression torn between pity and sheer I told you so.

The former won out though, because Cas quickly got up, grabbed the logs from Dean’s hand, and he motioned to his spot on the couch he’d just been sitting on. “Sit. I’ll get the fire going again and then I’ll warm you up.”

Dean did as directed, kicking his boots off and curling up into the warm spot on the couch. A second later, Cas was back, hauling a blanket over Dean before settling himself down on the couch; dragging Dean into his lap. He wrapped his arms around Dean’s back, drawing the blanket firmly around them until Dean was cocooned in warmth.

“I told you to get your jacket,” Cas mumbled against Dean’s ear.

Dean shivered, tucking his cold hands under Cas’ armpits, causing the former-angel to hiss.

“And thicker gloves next time, too.”

“But then I wouldn’t get these cuddles,” Dean muttered, tucking his face into the crook of Cas’ neck. “And I really love your warm cuddles.”

Cas snorted, pressing feather-light kisses to Dean’s jaw. “You don’t need the excuse of being cold to cuddle with me, Dean.”

Dean hummed, letting his eyes flutter closed as the loud crackling from the fire lulled him into a sleepy haze. He could feel the heat from the fire creeping up his back, and the warmth from Cas seeping into his bones.

“Maybe next time you can come out with me and keep me warm while I work?” Dean said, voice slipping into a thick-drawl as sleep started to tug him down.

“And miss our cuddle session by the fire? Hard pass. I much prefer warming you up right here when you’re done being the hero,” Cas teased.

And Dean smiled, pressing his grin into Cas’ throat as he drifted off to sleep; Cas arms rubbing comforting circles across his back.

Tag List Part 1 Below- (please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed from the list!)

Tag List: @cas-deserved-so-much-more @hello-x-sunshine @bibelphegor @likepurplemuses @expectingtofly @neo-neo-neo @shadowywerewolfqueen @a-sweet-indisposition @feraladoration @xojo

@oganizediguana @paintdriesfaster @adsp-destielcockles @destielangst @im-your-huckle-berry @justa-crayon @dea-stiel @superduckbatrebel @destielfactory @miluiel-erynion

@y-yo-a-ti-cas67 @cockleslovesdestiel @toxic-nebula @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @enchantinghairdoherringwombat @proudace @galaxymysteryelephant @aelysianmuse @ramennoodles-dean-cas @you-changedmedean

@welcome-to-crowleys-hellhole @deansotherotherblog @trekkie24 @geo-val @dizzypinwheel @hermionevaldez9 @gimmeprozac @iamsherlockedondoctorwho @dickspeightjrs @imbiowaresbitch

@destielle @hopefuldreamers-world @organicpurplepants @dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you @shut-up-dean @sapphirecobalt-1 @eshaninjer @spnobsessed50 @mishka @holygoddessofvictory

@jayus-fandom-writer @2musiclover2 @rainbowscas @bennedict @cassiecasyl @jensenacklesruinedmylife @can-i-just-stay-in-the-corner @chaoticdean @destiel-trash-asf @tlakhtwritesdestiel

@bri-winchester @50shadesofcockles @trasherasswood @spittingpagan @castielstolemyheart @becky-srs @phoenix13 @jiminthestreets-bonesinthesheets @deancasology @top13zepptraxx

@love-neve-dies @good-things-do-happen-dean @tearsofgrace @thedirtytrenchcoat @a-porno-with-the-russian-mafia @on-a-bender @moi-the-bard @one-more-offbeat-anthem @naturallyathief @queen-rowenas

#destiel #dean winchester #castiel #inspired by jensen in the snow #jensen ackles #snow #fluff #married destiel

[valwentinefics]

Hello!! May I request a Helmut Zemo x Reader where he comforts them from a really bad nightmare? Maybe he whispers sweet phrases to them in his native language? The reader can be female or gender neutral, whichever one you feel most comfortable with!

A/n: Thanks for the request I loved writing it, we need more soft Zemo in our lives. I did she/her pronouns because I feel more comfortable writing it (despite preferring they/them myself like what’s up with that??) I hope you’re fine with the addition of a lullaby at the end I just couldn’t help myself.

I never will be far away - Zemo x F!Reader

German is being used as Sokovian, translations are in the text. The song is Lullaby by Billy Joel.

Thank you to @grazessa for translation help!

The soft moonlight shone onto Y/n’s face as she awoke with a gasp, sitting up with heaving breaths. Her mind was filled with thoughts of her nightmare as she sat in the silent bedroom, the darkness consuming nearly everything but the body of her husband beside her. She brought her knees to her chest and buried her face in them, the tears flowing from her eyes easily as her muffled sobs filled the once quiet room. She didn’t notice the soft sound of sheets rustling as her husband Helmut Zemo awoke beside her, his soft brown eyes looking at her with concern as she cried into her hands.

Zemo sat up, reaching out his hand and placing it on her back, gently rubbing circles into it with his thumb. “Liebling (darling), what’s wrong?” He asked softly, his voice raspy and accent thick from just waking it.

 “It’s nothing important Helmut, go back to sleep, I’m sorry I woke you.” Y/n sniffled. 

“Hey, hey.” He said softly, grabbing Y/n’s hands gently and holding them in his own large warm ones. It was surprising how a man who had killed so many and ruined countless lives could be this soft and warm. “If it’s bothering you it’s important. Please, I want to help you through this, I don’t like seeing you upset.” 

Y/n let out a shuddering breath. “I’m just… I can’t bear the thought of you going back to prison. Every moment without you was painful, I felt as if I was suffocating on my own loneliness, and then I just had a nightmare of you being taken away from me again.” She clung onto Zemo, burying her face into his neck as sobs racked her body. He held her close silently, rocking her ever so slightly as his one hand played with the ends of her hair, the other rubbing her back soothingly.

“Schatz (sweetheart), I cannot promise I won’t be forced to leave you again, but I’ll do everything within my power to get back to you. You’re my wife, my true love, and it pains me to be away from you as much as it pains you.” He mumbled, eyes filling with tears. He wished to give her a better life. One where they could live in domestic bliss without the fear of the Dora or the government coming after him. A life where they could have a son and daughter running around cheerfully, lighting up rooms with their smiles. That was the kind of life Y/n deserved and it shattered Zemo’s heart that he wouldn’t be able to give her it. 

“I wish things were different Schatz (sweetheart), I wish I could give you the peaceful life you deserve, but what I can do is cherish and protect you and pray that is enough, that I am enough.” He continued.

Y/n lifted her head out of the crook of his neck, pressing her forehead against his. “That is enough Helmut, you are enough. I just can’t stand to lose you a second time.”

“Liebling (darling), I will fight my way through anything to see you. I promise you darling, even if I am taken, I will never be far away.” He said, cupping her cheeks. “Now get some rest meine Liebe (my love), and sleep well knowing I won’t leave your side.”

Y/n gave him a sleepy nod, shuffling under the covers, the tears no longer falling down her face.  Zemo sat beside her as she closed her eyes, his hands running through her hair while he began to softly sing. His voice wasn’t perfect and melodic, but to Y/n it was home, and led her to a peaceful sleep easily. 

“Goodnight, my angel, time to close your eyes, And save these questions for another day. I think I know what you've been asking me, I think you know what I've been trying to say. I promised I would never leave you, Then you should always know, Wherever you may go, no matter where you are, I never will be far away.” 

Zemo paused as he heard the gentle snoring come from his wife’s sleeping body. “Schatz, du schaffst es irgendwie, schön auszusehen, selbst wenn du im Mondlicht schläfst. Ich verspreche dir von ganzem Herzen, dass ich dich niemals verlassen werde, egal was uns im Weg steht. Ich werde immer zurückkommen, meine Liebe, du bist mein Licht, meine Luft, mein Herz.” (Honey, you somehow manage to look beautiful even when you sleep in the moonlight. I promise you with all my heart that I will never leave you no matter what stands in our way. I will always come back, my love, you are my light, my air, my heart.)

He gently pressed his lips against Y/n’s head, vowing to himself he would do everything in his power to give Y/n the life she deserved, free of turmoil and strife. A life where they could grow old together without fear of him dying or being taken away. A life of domestic bliss.

#baron zemo x reader #helmut zemo x reader #helmut zemo #zemo x reader #baron zemo #zemo #zemo imagine #tfatws #tfatws x reader

[junova]

↬ 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐥𝐮𝐞 | 𝐫. 𝐝𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐥𝐞

abstract — the one where ransom gets a taste of his own medicine, but you happen to be so much sweeter than he’s ever been. 

pairing — ooc!ransom drysdale x fem!reader 

wc — 4.1k+  im so sorry lmao 

warnings — cheating (if u squint its very vague), angst, fluff, slight self deprecation, ransom is kinda nice idk, i want a soft!ransom drysdale now pls, this is also very messy so read at ur own risk!

[m blabs] — howdy howdy! first time ransom fic. woot woot! still kinda finding my voice w writing so i hope you like it! <333 

His mouth set in a hard line as you continued to curl into his chest, the span of your confidence seemed to be wiped away with a nightmare from the past. Part of him was upset you hadn’t told him anything, the blind leading the blind, as you stepped foot into his family event. Seeing the last person you’d ever thought would be there. 

Surely by now, he thought you would trust him but it was more than evident you still didn’t. You persisted on hiding everything from him, anything you were sure might tick him off. 

Well, Ransom wasn’t necessarily known for biting his tongue.  Although, in your presence, he was learning what to say and where to say it. 

It really surprised him. Not one woman had been able to tame him, not since he’d be fucking everyone in sight. His desire was endless and not one single individual would be enough for his fill. 

Then, he found you drunk and sobbing on the concrete, right outside of the bar he was exiting. To this day, he still couldn’t tell you why he stopped for you. He never really paid attention to anyone if it wasn’t to his own benefit. Ultimately, meeting you was, even if he wouldn’t realize it then. 

You flinched from his touch when he patted your shoulder, gently asking if you were alright. If anyone asked him, Ransom would surely deny he felt you pull at the strings of his heart in an instant. 

He just knew. 

Maybe it’s why it took him so long to accept it, to believe in what he felt for you. Definitely not because you did nothing but be the most wonderful human he’d ever met. More had to do with him. 

Ransom dropped you off the first night you met in your small apartment downtown, definitely on the rougher side where he thought his Rolex sporting his wrist may get stolen. 

A cute little thing like you living in a neighborhood like this — didn’t make much sense to him. Then again, it certainly checked out with his privilege why he didn’t. 

Truly, Ransom didn’t realize how fortunate he truly was. Of course being a trust fund brat gave him the ignorance to live in an unmatched state of bliss. 

He still remembers the moment. 

Watching as you fumbled with your keys, finding it more than difficult to open your front door. It was cute, with your tongue poking out between your lips in concentration. Now, he wondered how he’d forgotten why he’d gone to get hammered at the bar in the first place. 

“Here, let me help.” New to Ransom, he offered a giving hand. Grabbing the key from your jittering fingertips before unlocking your door. He tried to hand you back your keys, but you pulled him so close, your chest touching his own. Dragging two rapid hearts through your apartment. 

“You smell like him.” A dopey smile on your face lighting every dark sight of Ransom, not that you’d know it did. “I smell like who?” 

“My ex-boyfriend.” Your hands cupping his cheek, but you were too drunk to realize how Ransom flinched from your touch. 

He didn’t push you away either. 

“But he definitely didn’t look this good.” Defying all laws of his own nature, Ransom let you stay in close proximity to him as you felt him up. Your hand resting on his chest, traveling lower stopping at his stomach. “Definitely didn’t feel this good.” 

He watched as you sighed, your puffy eyes were only slightly swollen and the mascara was still staining your skin with the rest of the makeup you wore. If anyone had asked him, you’d looked like a wreck but he still found you alluring. 

Ransom always liked his women looking more than fucked out, usually from gagging around his cock. Not crying over a broken heart. Nope. He definitely did not like dealing with a woman's sorrow. 

“He never let me touch him though. Guess that should have tipped me off.” You let your hands travel back up, wounding themselves around his neck before they applied more pressure — pulling him into you. 

Ransom found you pretty confident for not even knowing anything more than his first name and the car he drove you in. You were definitely craving attention and maybe he’d be more than happy to oblige but the little voice in his head Dr. Shoal told him to listen to was being a pestering, little bitch. 

What did Ransom want? 

Right now he wanted to drown himself in some sweet ass pussy. He knew you would give yourself easily to him, especially in your drunken state. Clinging onto him like he was a vine. 

The smaller part of him, the better part, knew you were drunk out of your mind. Absolutely plastered, but you had to stand there looking like a goddess. 

He didn’t really know why he was letting you touch him, maybe in hopes the deeper, darker side of him would win like it always did. Ransom knew better, even if he tried to hide it from everyone including himself. 

He liked you. From the very first moment, he knew he’d have to get you. Whether it cost your own sanity or his, Ransom didn’t care. 

It’s why he left you drunk and alone, safely tucked into the comfort of your sheets with his number left in your phone. Even taking the liberty of texting himself from it. 

He could never be too careful. Letting you slip through his fingers was simply not an option. 

Thanks to him, you didn’t forget about him. 

The next morning your memory only held vague images of a handsome stranger helping you home, thankfully he seemed to be nothing more than a doting gentlemen. The first for you to ever come across. 

Until later in the afternoon the following day, Ransom introduced himself and checked up on you, worming his presence into your life. 

Then he kept talking to you everyday, surprising even himself in the matter. Truly, he couldn’t help it. Part of him loved how gently you spoke to him on the phone. No one ever talked to him with such a level of care. 

He always warranted yelling, usually he was the one who stirred the pot. He enjoyed it, and thrived in a chaotic environment. It’s what he grew up in. Ransom was more than comfortable with his own family yelling and cursing him out until the sun came up. He did just the same. 

So, whenever you sweetly asked him how he was, it threw him off guard. 

Not a single soul even cared or bothered to ask him anything. Truth be told, Ransom was a sack of shit treating everyone like they were the gum beneath his shoe. It didn’t matter who talked to him — Ransom was simply more superior in every conceivable way. 

He would succumb to not a single soul. Paving his own way through life, with only the money from his trust fund of course. 

Then the two of you fell into each other and he could pinpoint the exact moment he did. 

The weeks and months blended together. He couldn’t really tell you why he was still lingering around, while he got nothing in return. You did get him off once or twice, but he wasn’t fucking you like he really wanted to. 

Maybe it was the innocence in your eyes pulling his soul into the very little good he still had left within him. Or maybe it was the way your thumb dragged over his cheek when you thought he was in slumber, blissfully unaware of your touch. 

More importantly his favorite thing, the way you let him hold you when the two of you cuddled. Your arms wrapped tightly around his waist, bouncy cheeks pressed into whatever knit sweater he decided to wear that day. 

It was all the little things, unknowingly making him fall in deep like he never had before. 

Unwelcoming to him, his mother came barreling in one Sunday afternoon, while you slept in his arms. Even as Linda screamed his name, you never jolted, out like a log. Safe in the peace he kept you in. 

Linda looked annoyed, irritated he even had company in the first place but not surprised. What truly shocked her was they both had clothes on.  Not truly believing Ransom was capable of such a sinless interaction. 

He knew what she wanted; he didn’t even have to move from his position to continue a private conversation. Not that it would get him off the couch, and out of your embrace in the first place. 

“I said no. Don’t know why you bothered coming here.” Linda angrily sighed. “You should at least show up.” 

Ransom didn’t notice, but subconsciously continued to run his fingertips up and down your spine. Linda did. She noticed that he didn’t even care she was judging him, but let you remain unbothered sleeping in her son’s embrace. 

“It’s for Walt. You need to be there.” She stepped closer, hoping the increase in her volume would wake you. “I expect you to grace us with your wonderful presence as does the rest of the family.” 

The sarcasm dripped, attempting to coax him out of the four walls he never seemed to leave. Not recently, anyhow. 

“I already told you, I can’t.” Now Ransom was irritated and he really wished she would calm the fuck down. It was one day, one event. There would always be another, that much wasn’t lost on him. “I have plans. Send him my best.” 

Assuming it was the rumbling of his chest when he spoke, you moved jolting yourself in his arms, before remaining still again. His heartbeat continues to soothe you. 

“You have plans? What else could be more important than your family?” The louder Linda’s voice grew the more you stirred, pissing him off. 

He really needed to change his locks. 

Even if he had no intention of going, he needed his mother to leave. Really for your own sake — trying to save you from Linda giving you a cold shoulder followed with a third degree burn. 

“Fine. I’ll go. Can you just leave?” She accepted Ransom’s submission, before looking at your figure. Sound asleep and clinging to her one and only, sinking your claws into him. 

She really didn’t like the way Ransom was looking at you. Linda was positive he would never be able to care about someone other than himself, but here he was, holding you close to his chest. 

Almost like his life depended on it. 

“Who is she to you?” With a raised eyebrow, eyes narrowing to you before meeting back with Ransom’s cerulean blues. 

“I don’t know yet.” Ransom paused looking down at you, so beautiful. Holding a light so pure, so radiant; he hoped no matter how cruel he could be, he’d never act like that towards you. “Maybe someone I don’t deserve, but want to be better for.” 

His rough, calloused fingers drawing mindless patterns on the exposed skin of your waist. He didn’t know what Linda said next or when she left. 

Time seemed to stand still, his confession hitting his chest fiercely. He let himself sit with it for a moment, before you woke up. Enjoying a moment where he didn’t have to deal with anything, he didn’t have to say a word. 

He could just enjoy the moment without eyes judging him or you questioning why his eyes seemed to shine just a bit brighter whenever you were around. 

It was the first of many. Moments where he felt small pieces of himself chipped away into your care. Planes of existences within him no one had ever scratched the surface of. 

Much like right now as you cried into his chest, begging for mercy. 

Because you were afraid. Terrified you had made the worst mistake, an unforgivable one. You lied about your past and to Ransom it felt like more than a betrayal. More accurately he felt a dagger in his heart placed strategically with your murderous hands. 

He’d never felt such empathy and pain at once. Maybe he’d never been empathetic a day in his life at all. 

Until now. 

To make matters worse, he knew his entire family was watching the whole scene from the window. It wasn’t from worry or concern for either one of you. Mainly all of them enjoying pain being inflicted on Ransom. 

Linda of course wallowing in her ego, he could practically see her bask in her own pride. Another thing she’d been right about checked off the list. 

The rest of the family watched the two of you fight with shiteating grins permanently stamped on their face. They’d never seen Ransom care about anyone but you. To watch the relationship he held so close to his heart blow up so publicly, only fueled the fire to Ransom’s rage. 

Except Harlan. 

Even through his hot, beating anger Ransom was trying his best to comfort you. To calm you down even if you had been the one to be caught red handed. Harlan couldn’t believe it, someone Ransom seemed to care about more than himself. 

More than any of his family. Not that Harlan was offended. Well, maybe a little, but more so he was thrilled his grandson finally found someone he had to grow up for. Someone he had to earn, not buy. 

No bribes. No schemes. No games. 

Just you. 

“Hugh, please talk to me.” How could he? It’s not like he had much to say. Maybe he did, he just wasn’t sure how to get the words out without hurting you or himself. 

“I know I lied and I fucked up, but please — we need to talk about it.” Soft hands reaching for his own, but he brushed them off, his hands snaked higher on your waist. “We should have talked about this the moment you met me.” 

Dead silence is all you were met with as he walked the fine line of pushing you away, leaving you behind and pulling you closer than he ever had. 

“You’re right. I should have told you the truth but can you blame me?” He met you with solemn eyes and his own heart beating rapidly. “Yes I can.” Ransom was trying to act cold and distant but the two windows to his soul told a different story. 

“That’s fair.” Even as he was holding you, Ransom still felt like he was a galaxy away. He was withholding himself from you like a turtle retracting into their own protection. A year ago, before he met you, he knew he would have never even recognized it. 

Now, you made it possible for him to be aware of just how much he had changed. He broke old habits of his own just to please you so when you disappointed him, this unreachable high standard he held you to, it shattered his sense of self. 

“Did you still love him?” Ransom questioned you. “I did. At the time, he’s all I ever really knew. I thought that’s what love felt like. The only image of love I had was the one he gave me. So, I ran with him and it crushed me.” 

Ransom had to pretend the words you were speaking didn’t split him into you two. The image of you falling in love with someone else was enough to make him wanna strangle your ex. 

His friend. 

“Then we just got into one really big blow out. Right in the bar in front of all of his friends I had met for the first time that night.” You reached for a chunk of his sweater, clenching the material in your hand, like you were trying to convince yourself to let the words fall from your mouth. 

“He told me how much I’d been irritating him and I couldn’t help but notice every girl he flirted with and touched right in front of me.” You tested the waters, placing both of your hands over his chest, the beat of his heart calming you down. 

“Then I just cracked. It was only one of the many fights we’d been having over the course of the past few months. Everyone single argument pushed me closer to the edge, until the last one actually did.” You sighed, watching as he frowned. 

“I ended things that night, before getting thoroughly plastered and soon enough crying on the cement. Wasted and lonely out of my mind, until I met you.” You moved your hand from his heart, cupping his clean shaven face. 

“You made me realize I never knew what love really meant or felt like.” This piqued Ransom’s interest. 

You said love. 

Could a tragedy bring out the words Ransom craved to hear more than anything in the world? 

Maybe you cared about him, more than anyone ever showed him. But loved him? How could someone be as hateful as him be worthy of someone like you? 

Even if you had broken his heart, he’d done far worse to more people than he could count. He wasn’t really in a place to judge but it didn’t change the fact it still hurt. A lot. 

“Hugh.” You heard him gulp rather loudly. “Yes?” His tone came out as more of a question than a response. 

The silence he gifted you was unsettling at the very least. “You've barely said a word.” He was surprised he didn’t scurry off in his beamer the second he saw the guilt reach your eyes. 

He was surprised he hadn’t let his anger take over and let the rage he felt inside body take it all out on you. 

He was surprised he somehow couldn’t inflict a single hateful word towards you, even as you sat with his heart in your hands. 

In pure bliss of just how much you owned him. 

“I hate it. This fucking corner you’ve back me into. Not to mention for the prying eyes of my entire family to watch the show.” The sharp tone he uses sensoring you. “You used me just to get back at him.” 

“Like I was some pawn in your game and I really even shouldn’t be mad.” He paused, trying to choose his words as carefully as he can. “I’ve done the same thing to so many different women. Used them and threw them out at my earliest inconvenience.” To your surprise, even Ransom’s, a single tear left his eye showing you how much you really meant to him. 

You hated yourself for letting it get to this point. 

“But you? I could never even think about hurting you. I could never live with myself if I treated you like everyone else because you’re so much more than that to me.” The tears continued to roll. The dame Ransom kept shut his entire life, opened because of you and he just wanted to make it stop. 

He would give anything — even you. 

He just wanted to not feel like a piece of shit for once in his life. For a moment, he thought he might have a chance to be something more than the picture he portrayed in everyone’s mind. You showed him maybe it was more complex than it seemed. 

“I just assumed I was that for you.” You sighed in frustration, softly wiping his tears away. “You are, though. You are more than that.” 

“Then how could you be so okay with lying to me?” The crease between his eyebrows only created more of an indention as he felt the anger trying to escape out of him. 

You let the tension get to you first. 

“Because I-I was scared if I told you the truth, you’d never tell me.” You puzzled him once again. You softly reach up between his furrowed eyebrows, the pad of your thumb smoothing it out. 

“Tell you what?” His mind was clouded with the possibilities of what he could have missed. 

“I can’t spell this one out for you.” You were tired of being the one to do everything first. Even if your intentions weren’t free from fault once you realized who he was, your feelings for him were anything but. 

“I don’t know what you want from me. You only let me fall for you because you knew how much it would hurt him.” He bit back, growing impatient and tired. “Any other time, I would have cared. Probably would have been more than happy to assist. But you made me-” 

Then Ransom cut himself off, jumping out of the swing and away from you. 

“I’m sorry. I can’t do this. I thought I could.” He literally sprinted to his beamer, but you chased him. 

You were hell bent and just as crazy as he was. Maybe it’s why it worked for as long as it did. 

“Hugh! Get back here.” You were running, thankful you’d gone for a more casual outfit today, the sneakers supporting your feet far better than the heels you’d usually wear. 

Maybe if it was someone with a normal childhood upbringing you would have just cut your losses but this was someone who chose to be called Ransom. 

This was someone who chose to run away from love and care because the only affectionate way he knew how to treat someone was to throw money at them. 

This was someone who had the communication of a ten year old because that’s when his own mother didn’t bother to mess with him anymore before sending him off to boarding school. 

This was someone who didn’t know how to love — and to be loved. 

By the time you caught up to him his was digging for his keys, but he couldn’t fucking find them. 

“Hugh Ransom Drysdale.” Your tone was sharp and he knew you meant business. “For once in your life, stop running away.” 

“Why not? What good has it ever done for me to stay?” His back was facing you, his broad shoulders stilled with the rest of his body. Almost like he was ashamed of what he was hiding. 

“I can’t speak for everyone else. I can’t speak for your mother or for Richard. For Harlan or for anyone else you thought might abandon you and really did.” You inched you way closer until you knew he felt how close you were to him.

“I can only speak for me.” Giving yourself, the final piece of you to a man who might run away from it. 

You were so close he felt your breath on his back, and it made him tremble. He was shaking, terrified of it all. You didn’t let him be for long. 

Intertwining your fingers with his, as he kept them at his sides, rubbing your thumb along the palm of his hand. 

“I’m sorry for the way I hurt you. Lied to you. You never deserved it. Never.” You thought it would be easier if he didn’t have to look at you while pouring your heart out to him. A theory proved to be right as he gave your hand a squeeze. 

“You’ve done nothing but treat me like a princess. You’ve done right by me, more than anyone else I’ve ever met in my life. It made me feel inadequate. My dark secret, always looming over us like a dark cloud of my own personal doing.” 

“I’m sorry I haven’t done the proper thing by us and made you feel like I used you. You had every right to feel it because I did.” You took a deep breath, mustering up the courage to face whatever the future held for the two of you. 

“I never expected to fall in love with a trust fund, playboy brat.” You felt him take a deep breath, like a breath he’d be holding all his life could finally be set free. 

“I love you, Hugh.” The next thing you knew he had you pushed up against the car, lips hungrily attacking your own. 

All forgiven because you love him. You actually were in love with him. 

He couldn’t fathom it really because you’d been the first. To accept him just as he was. The first to refuse to call him Ransom because you like the way Hugh rolled off your tongue better. 

You liked how he felt on your tongue, too. 

The first to tell him Fran and Marta should call him Hugh because you wanted to be the only one who got to. The first woman to cook for him, willingly and not attached to the Thrombey payroll. 

The first woman he had ever fallen in love with. 

The first one he’d stick around and not run away for. 

So, he kissed you. Hard. Softly whispering how much he loved you into the kiss, because maybe he wasn’t ready to say it outright. Loud and proud. 

Yet, he felt it with every bone of his body — no longer lost in the blues.

taglist: @tonystankschild @parkastoria @tinylumpiaa @brattycherubwrites

#im so anxious to post this #bc i dont really love it but....... #here we go folks. #i rewrote it too many times sksksk 💀 #not doing it again #ransom drysdale #ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale smut #ransom drysdale fluff #ransom drysdale fic #ransom drysdale one shot #ransom drysdale fanfiction #chris evans #chris evans x reader #m.writes

[crackcrocs]

DEATH WILL ONLY BE THE BEGINNING #3

3. Transformation Central

the entities of my personalities would like to come together in one voice that speaks through me, we or I call this collection of words from the mustiest corners of my brain to this note page to voice something that might come close to what I feel underneath the skin I wear. In all my unorganised words- I might even go as far as to call this a poem, titled:

‘TRANSFORMATION CENTRAL’

sub characters in my head would appreciate if this could be visualised & understood through as deep a lens as humanly possible. even I confuse myself so if you can decode or relate to any of this, wonderful. If not, I’m locked in my own mind, swallowed the keys to my soul.

SIMILARITIES & INTERCONNECTEDNESS BETWEEN HUMAN & PLANT CONSCIOUSNESS EXIST! if you look closely at my nose freckles you’ll see the resemblance of the constellations above. if you look at the human veins & the layout of a tree, this is further proof.

{VISUALS THROUGH A SEPIA WINDOW STARING @ THE AUTUMN LEAFS; IMAGINING THE SEEDS UNDERNEATH, THROUGH NUMB ROOT VESSELS THAT PERMEATE THROUGH EVERY MEMBRANE OF MY EXTERNAL TO INTERNAL ENVIRONMENT}

~FEATURING THE VICIOUS CYCLE OF DEPRESSION & PERFECTIONISM.

here goes:

What is this part of my mind ?

If you want; delve inside-

I may look sweet like Alice,

but underneath it all

I deteste looking in the mirror

-cos I see the mad hatter.

my inner child needs a platter-

full of care not distortion & abuse pls.

less fibbin would’ve been a breeze.

now following the dead fish in the stream!

HOW on EARTH do I fit with the cod & the Haddock?

I’m the rainbow fish- beat & battered.

dim my own light cos I’m too afraid to shine.

alone.

thieves tried to steal my shiny scales.

I sat and watched them grow.

In the sea realm they were mean gargantuan selfish whales, with poisonous shark fangs & alligator tails. scorpion hands. (gremlins)

and still they make me feel like the alien-

I cant take it.

Make it make sense ?

I can’t.

controller in my hand-

Off balance stance.  

anxiously I move round like a wobbly jelly.

where’s the button to balance my chi & shut out the ego ?

the teLLIE telling lies to our vision!

change the channel aura terracotta orange- daily dosage of vitamin D & C.

catch me sun gazing by the sea

head buzzin like a bee.

speaking from a dusty box

stuck on top of a forbidden shelf

cos I dunno how else.

I’m tryna delve deep but forgot how to dive

How can i visualise? scenery foggy-

the establishment man with the glue gun got me xD

inner monk burning but at peace

Cos I refuse to believe

If the only way is the American dream

Interconnected; like the frog in science -let’s dissect it!

down to every floating atom spirit neighbouring your door

subcategories & divisions, it’s more!

than the rich and the poor -prism that’s been built

do we all feel like a performance monkey on stilts?

will my data be extracted & used to mould a robots personality some day?

well obviously not.

does the price of our lives all amount down to slave ways?

LABOUR YAY!

but morals & values it seems we’ve forgot.

sO If i don’t speak its cos I’m lost.

or maybe i’m enlightened-

Standing at the edge of the porch;

watching TRYING to understand how the flowers grow.

questioning eVERYTHING man made!

I’ve stepped out of the perfect picture frame

I can see the coal pollute the sky

I need to hop on the train-

but I’m comfortable

Sunset to sunrise statue standing still.

what’s the ingredients to life’s yucky pie?

I’ve exceeded mental lotteries.

Sanity n universal peace would be a trophy.

TIL then I’ll be crafting & shaping a solid pottery reality,

with a few pence, gum, and a bandana of belongings tied to stick.

thinking one day I’ll be laying the bricks

& building a kingdom of bliss.

guess for now I’ll use the intricate delicate materials in my tool box- that’s all I’ve got.

might have a long way- maybe worth a shot.

I observe, cruisin in the sky.

dunno why..

I jus look @ the hills.

Only time & history reveals.

no thanks mr men-

I don’t want your prescription pills.

there’s enough propaganda as it is.

I won’t jump on the merry go round-

til my core trusts & envisions we’ll actually feel safe!

I don’t want to take part in this faux fur, sweet nothings & a jack in a box punching blur, so called future.

oh and genuinely thanks quarantine-for once again, I can hear bird sounds!

guess this is me tryna speak out loud!!!...

it’s not thrilling

system  time killing everything-

mother nature’s oxygen

everything is nauseating

clock ticking, I better start creating.

they should write a book on how to be free when the system set us up to believe that we’re tied to the cut down trees that gives them a currency of greed that they breed.

If blindfolded, I don’t wanna eat what they feed.

Whilst they profit of us -tell us smile and the bandits don’t wanna see us happy.

they’re too busy robbing all our hoods.

In exchange for the silence, they’ve granted us with a 21’st century fashion garment of a slave muzzle! labelled conform.

More delusion to add to the already desensitised norm.

zootonic diseases, welcome covid 19 to your plastic kiddy tea party!- apologies for questioning your motive!

Been handed too many hot plates with a post it note saying HOLD THIS.

we’ll be okay just hush.

Same Shan message told to every generational seed.

If we don’t TRY overpower-

we’ll never succeed!

it’s getting even more scary.

Artificial intelligence.

Societal negligence..

my canvas isn’t clear-dunno am I schizo ?

finger painting, cos it makes more sense.

struggling to blend.

borderline conspiracist pretending to be fine;

moving the goal post, hovering above the race line.

who made the chalk? who set the lanes?

I wanna know it all, maybe¿ far past insane.

I can fit all I need in the palm of my hand,

Maybe even less! cut a finger off not sure it’ll even add stress.

hi from personality Peter, even sober- always away with the fairies.

Pass the pixie dust, I’m in a rush

Found shelter in the comfort of pan physicists timer, no not the one on your phone!

Ring ring, skeptical! is it my demon or my mommy on the phone?

I’m stuck in the airspace of an infinite glass filled with beach particles trying to form myself standing up still attempting not to slip through the hands of my very own discovery.

time is running out & ill go when I go.

I’m sitting inside the fly trap -

stardust, chakras can you feel the sensation colors like a starburst.

deep emotion is a curse.

still entrapped in the sand dune of nothingness-

flipping a domino monopoly of solidified thoughts as I sway with the wind.

I’m the trapped sandbox in the playground & the slipping sand in my own hands.

Inhale chronic but I wanna enter the quiet realm of white noise

-color of a wife beater vest, calmer than the ease in ignorance of a red neck.

sadomasochistic, messes.

but oblivion, seems like less stress.

Unfortunately I can see, with all eyes

empathetic paralysis, gets me vexed.

Punching truth into the core of your chest!

It’s not funny, neither is the one on the receiving end..

My limbs are numb

& im done playing octopus alchemy.

I want minimalism & life can be simple,

Evil entities have made it hard.

Maybe I’ve got stars above my head like an old cartoon character.

But I can’t make it make sense, are they out to get me. worse all of us? Or have I bottled myself tryna re mesh the broken shards,

I feel glued to the floor cos there’s a pretty price to pay if you want more.

I see life through a different lense, maybe born downside up, Benjamin button I came out the back door-

Outside looking in, digesting confusion.

Is to be a product of environment a sin?

rummage through my messy brain.

personalities sardine packed in this tin

I’m the wizard of my mania

Scaring & attracting the black crows-

they’re my friends.

Sometimes still a cowardly lion

Roaring pain & true riddles at the wrenching wicked witch posse of the west.

will my voice ever be loud enough to shed light wit my words and grate the sweet zest

In to the cake i’m baking?

Probably not.

Got more thoughts than the autumn leaves collected by the garden rake. alone.

gathering & storing the pains of yesterday.

sometimes I stay in line

Other times in my head Im on my hands juggling out of time.

but I really don’t mind if I lose or win.

we all have a pace

I jus don’t want the 1% to win the race.

It’s unfair!

Humanity does anyone care ??

Half lady

half fairy

Good  MOOrning-

from my anagrams.

no I’m not a cow.

twister fidget spinner brain in the flesh-

form of expression this time around lyrics.

feel I’m jus a silly rubix

& still mourning

I don’t like dairy

pass the oat milk.

Are you aware the industry are sabotaging our diets?

we want peace!

the powerful elite-

perceive & deceive

the scene they want us to be.

chuck the narcissistic psychopathic pie back in our face-

every time we almost found & addressed the Programme & Control man in the maze.

evil & extroverted- he said that the anarchists have to be the cause of riots.

working isn’t class. I said let’s switch roles- he said pass.

It’s piss! Who’s got the bomb & the guns?

Who got the land? off wit OUR heads 4 fun!

it’s pure scary.

Pharmaceutics handshake.

with the cooked up suppliers, also crooked wack liars.

I’d rather shot a gallon of bloody blubbery infused slaughter house milk

If it meant we didn’t use cocoons for silk.

why not add a drizzle of bleach to the concoction & maybe that’s a reach.

every time I guzzle fakeness, it taste peak.

I want real fruit, what next-

a seedless peach ???

what’s the difference between a weirdo & a freak?

layers & levels to the shit.

Magnifying tapping the window of society, I’ll be puffing green til I get to the land of Oz.

sponge soaked soaking up emotions

Suffocated by deduction of care in life

feel entrapped in this paradigm

what am I thinking ?

got the verbs & a cuppa tea

It’s mixed with torment & desire to be free.

I’d rather be awake than asleep

When I get too comfy I feel weak

Demons they reap

underneath

rip the seems as I bleed

Concrete

Solid

Emotions

Is all you’re getting

It’s all sad scenes in the imagery I’m setting

people need care we seem to be forgetting

why are we in debt wit

a posse of clowns

pay the price so we can get a frown

here’s some seratonin

quit ya moaning

life is all sound

aw yeh¿  if you’re not an over thinker!

product of environment- Sirius flickers

theyve done a ritual like it’s Wicca

now here’s your gold sticker..

for managing to co operate.

In this world fuelled off of evil n hate

waking ups a bloody disgrace

I am not amazed.

Man I love my fam n my friends

Just hate this part of my brain that feels the need to play pretend

sometimes I feel insane

but I’m calm

need to escape so I don’t do harm

Gold lioness in the sky by the sea

with puff the magic dragon

fire out my mouth, fuel helps me breathe

I will shine bright

Promise imma be alright

even tho I’m not sure why

I function like this

I wanna be myself

It’s just hard to find the comfortability

To feel happy and pretty

Lay me down on a bed of roses

Ring around sing about overdose emotions

Sorry dunno how to communicate

Heads in a constant debate

Should I go or should I stay

My head clashes

Burnin the next ciggy as my thoughts become ashes.

#LCZABIBU #deathwillonlybethebeginning

[wildgeese2017]

You: what makes you happy?

Stranger: His smile

You: thats so nie

You: nice

Stranger: But I haven’t seen in in a while

You: :(

Stranger: What makes you happy?

You: i like lying down and feeling the earth cradling my whole physical body i like listening to music by myself

You: but i feel like its all sucks bc it never lasts

You: like his smile

You: i dont know how to make sense of it all

Stranger: I feel you

Stranger: Seems like nothing lasts

You: it scares me

Stranger: And you never know when the last time is going to be the last time

Stranger: You always think you will have more

Stranger: Until you don’t

You: i feel like an animal i feel so blind to what fate has planned for me

You: i want to believe in something to sort of see everything through the right lens but i just dont know whether i cud

You: like i dont know what gods means to me

You: what does it mean to you?

Stranger: I try to trust in him

Stranger: But the faith is being tested

Stranger: I feel like so much unfairness couldn’t come from god

You: i used to know so surely that the whole point of this suffering was that it was a test or an inevitabilty but i worry that my conclusion was false

You: im scared that my faith is just learned helpessness

You: do you have anything you wanted to say

You: like why you are on this platform

Stranger: I just hope you get enough motivation to hold on

Stranger: Even if it’s the bare minimum

You: thanks im fine i just feel so confused

Stranger: I am pretty sure that someday something will come that will make it worth it

You: im doing well im being nice to my loved ones im going to work im having fun im just existentially terrified

Stranger: For everyone

You: yeh i think so too

You: i kno u dont kno me but im rooting for you

Stranger: How old are you ? Sorry if that’s too personal

You: im 20

Stranger: I’m rooting for you too!!! 😄

You: thx

Stranger: The confusion starts at the twenty’s

Stranger: I’m 25 and haven’t figured it out

You: lol ive been confused 4 so long tho

You: i think being confused is the whole point

Stranger: Maybe the meaning of life isn’t to find it purpose

Stranger: But to live and live while it lasts

Stranger: Love*

You: like its all just fluctuations of energy and the universe is just reminding itself that it exists bc being is the point of being like a perfect circle of belief and truth

You: yes i think so too

You: but it leads me to chasing empty bliss

Stranger: You should write a book about it

Stranger: Or poems

You: i want to feel more purpose but i dont know how im scared of nit finding peace and my vulnerability being exploited

You: i write poetry but i feel as tho i havent developed craft

Stranger: You must be brave to feel extraordinary :)

You: how do u express urself?

You: :)

Stranger: I dance

You: <3

Stranger: I’m a dancer

You: thats so wonderful

Stranger: Not good with words

You: does it make you feel free? i can only dance with the lights off

Stranger: Sometimes I turn the music up and close my eyes and just dance whatever I feel inside

You: that sounds nice

You: what kind of music do u like?

Stranger: And most of the times it feels like breaking my own heart

You: :(

Stranger: But it flies itself back together right after

You: in a good or bad way?

Stranger: Glues*

You: sometimes i wish i cud crack open my heart and show people

Stranger: I feel like a slightly cracked heart must fall apart to be build up again

You: i always paraphrase kafka when he said the reason for everything he did is to try and express the unexpressable

Stranger: People tend to ignore small cracks

Stranger: But take it serious when it’s all in pieces

You: :( i wish we cud all b more gentle with each other

Stranger: Same

You: i wish i had more energy to see everyones breaking hearts and fill up the cracks with my own love

Stranger: And I wish we would only fall in love with people who fall for us back

You: are you in love with him?

Stranger: I am

You: i dont kno whether ive ever been in love love what is it like?

Stranger: I’ve been in love once before

Stranger: And I swore I’d never open myself up for anyone

Stranger: And my best friend convinced me to go on this date with this guy

Stranger: And when he kissed me I just knew

You: that must hav been terrifying

Stranger: Took me 5years tho

Stranger: To fall like this again

Stranger: It was

Stranger: In it’s ironic way

Stranger: And it still is

You: i can tget close to anyone like that bc ive got all this stuff i cant let anyone see its brave for you to let someone in even if it hurts

Stranger: You know what?

Stranger: It wasn’t a decision I made !!

You: huh i never thought of it that way

You: maybe it was god

Stranger: Im fact the decision I took was to not let him in before we went on that date

Stranger: It wasn’t something I was in control of

Stranger: And it took him 5 hours to kiss me 😄

Stranger: And when he did time stopped

Stranger: And so did my senses except for feeling

You: what makes him so special? is it just the way he makes you feel or is there a big reason in your mind?

Stranger: It’s …

Stranger: How can I say this

Stranger: He was a surprise

Stranger: I didn’t expect him to be that good

You: did you feel like you had met before?

Stranger: I thought he’d be just another mediocre guy

You: so he suprised you

Stranger: But when I saw his smile and eyes I just knew I was screwed

Stranger: Yeah

Stranger: Feel good to finally talk about all this haha

You: ive never felt that way about way about anyone it sounds so confusing

You: is he kind?

Stranger: He was

You: is he not anymore?

Stranger: Sadly no

You: :(

Stranger: He decided to take a step back from me

You: what did he do to make you feel this way (if you dont mind me askin)

You: oh

Stranger: I remember when he called me to tell me he’s not ready for a relationship

You: what are you going to do? i cant imagine never seeing anyone i care about like that again

Stranger: Last time I saw him was three weeks ago

Stranger: And last time I heard from him was one week bwfore

You: did you know him long before ?

Stranger: Three months

Stranger: Not that long

Stranger: But I knew what he would mean to me when I first saw him

Stranger: So it felt like a smaller eternity

You: that sound so difficult

Stranger: I miss him terribly:)

You: i cant imagine feeling that way it wud really scare me everyone i talk to ive known for like 8years i cant give so much of myself to someone new

Stranger: You don’t have to give yourself to someone all at once

Stranger: Be protective of your energy

Stranger: And never trust the other person to not hurt you!

Stranger: But trust yourself and how you will react to it

Stranger: Trust that’s you would be strong enough to handle it

You: do you think he saw the real you? its so weird to think that everyone percieves you differently and out of your own control i worry that i focus too much on an idea of a person that i cud be

Stranger: Yea and no

Stranger: What I showed him was the real me but I also know that I didn’t show him everything that I am

Stranger: I feel your fear ! You got to know who you are as a person first

Stranger: And you got to be authentic with the people around you

You: i think it takes so long to show a clear picture of urself and its always moving and running away from the person you were when you last talked to that person who you want to really see you

Stranger: Exactly!

Stranger: That’s probably the most genuine talk I ever had

You: im so tired of trying to be a person i wish i cud just melt into everyone around me but theres so much i dislike about those around me and its not possible anyway. its just hard knowing the reason for everything is human connection and not living in a way that respects that truth

Stranger: Thank you

You: thank you too

You: i really appreciate your sharing its so scar to be honest out loud

You: *scary

Stranger: True

Stranger: I guess being anonymous makes it easier

You: yeh i just i was going to see a friend today who i feel like understands me but i couldnt in the end and i needed to express a part of myself u kno even tho im talking to other people who know me and care its not the same

You: i hope ou feel better soon regardless of what he chooses for himself

Stranger: I know exactly what you mean

Stranger: After all I have to choose myself over him as well :)

Stranger: Sometimes love isn’t enough

Stranger: Who am I fooling… most of the times it’s not enough

You: i have so many kind lovely friends and family who is trying but i cant let go of this heavy thing its like theres always some invisible chain wrapped around me

You: yeh :(

You: why cant we all help each other more

Stranger: Not many people are spiritual enough to say love is enough and all that matters f*ck the rest

You: i know so many people in pain and im too tired to be there all the time

You: its easy for me to say love is enough when i dont hav so many real problems that cant b solved with love alone

Stranger: I really pray for you to break out of those chains

Stranger: You seem like an amazing loving and caring person

Stranger: You deserve happiness

You: thanks i dont kno whether my hope has any power to reach you but i really hope you get some relief from your pain too

You: you too

You: i think we all do but i cant know that im so lucky to not meet people who are cruel enough to take that belief away from me

Stranger: And if you ever do meet people like that do me the favor of removing them immediately

Stranger: If it costs you your peace it’s too exoenz

You: i guess but i always think what happens to them when im gone?

Stranger: Expensive *

You: where do they go?

Stranger: ALWAYS !

You: what do they feel?

Stranger: That’s none of your business

Stranger: Let them find their own way

You: yeh i think we all need to respect ourselves to let go of toxicity

Stranger: You don’t have to guide them

You: i just feel like i want to care more i want to love more but i dont and that makes me feel small and selfish i wish we cud all connect our love its so scary not being able to reach each other

You: im scared to change and become better it sounds so hard i feel so selfish

Stranger: You’re not selfish if it means protecting your energy

Stranger: But don’t stand in your own way

Stranger: Be brave

Stranger: Can’t stress that enough

You: thanks i think i do need to be braver i try and look more people in the eye but maybe i need to be brave against myself more than against other people

Stranger: Have you ever watched greys anatomy?

You: since they arent in my control

You: no but all my friends love it

You: its on my list loll

Stranger: So Meredith grey said something like :

Stranger: Maybe she wasn’t opening up to people not because she was scared of the love she would receive

Stranger: But scared of what would happen when they took this live away from her someday

Stranger: Once you get a taste of love

Stranger: It’s like a drug

Stranger: Love*

You: like you and him, i find it hard to accept it when people choose me over someone else so i push them away to other people and i get upset that they replaced me

You: love is so scary

You: its too much

Stranger: Me and him …

Stranger: I feel like this story is not over yet

Stranger: :)

Stranger: And that calms me

You: i think if you have so much love inside you, u will succeed and find yourself in a good place if you focus on that love

Stranger: Yeah

Stranger: I literally believe in love because of the way I know I am capable to love

You: sometimes i worry that im not capable of love like that like i have something inside me that puts people off even though on a surface level i seem nice and passionate or sweet or whatever

You: like i worry im just playing a part and soon ill get tired of acting and i wont be what people need anymore

Stranger: Don’t worry too much

Stranger: Just truly be yourself

You: thanks i will try too

You: its so weird loving life this much and still not being happy

Stranger: Damn

You: like im so happy but its never enough

You: its not the right kind of joy it wont fit

Stranger: And this whole convo started with this simple question

You: loll

Stranger: What makes you happy

Stranger: Lol

Stranger: You know what I just realized

You: wot :0

Stranger: My answer was wrong in so many ways

Stranger: Your happiness shouldn’t be depending on someone else

Stranger: Cause you can’t control other peoples behavior

You: thats so real

You: its so scary tho since you cant b alone but you cant rely purely on others

Stranger: Your happiness should only be in your hands

Stranger: So controversial

Stranger: It’s a daily risk lol

You: like other people are all that matters but to them you are the other people so we all need to be kind to ourselves to be kind to each toher but we're all to hurt and scared to do all of it in the right way

You: we're all walking around with a piece of the happy puzzle and we have'nt figured out how to put it together

Stranger: sometimes we forget that all people are vulnerable and maybe hurting too

Stranger: When someone hurts your feelings you tend to forget you might have hurt theirs too

You: i always remember but i dont always respect it and that makes me dislike the kind of person i let myself be

Stranger: You will learn to

You: i hope so

You: i think thats the point

Stranger: Don’t pressure yourself

You: like we live and we all learn the same lesson

You: but it seems like its always repeating

You: like why haven't we learned it yet

You: like we're all one soul

You: and we can't reach the end of this problem or is the point how good we feel at points of it? i cant just chase joy if its fleeting iworry that even love is fleeting

You: idk i know we only hav the present

You: like all the advice uve given me i trust it

You: i just freak out thinking of the big picture

Stranger: Relax 😄

Stranger: It’s not all that serious

Stranger: Don’t forget to live along the way

Stranger: Love was never meant to be safe or measured!

Stranger: You got to be brave and love irritationally

You: i think that that is fair i just i go long stretches living and then i remember the whole question of why and how shud i live and i get all tangled up again

Stranger: And instead of being scared, trusting yourself with it

You: i think i need to trust more and i think faith is trust

Stranger: Grow and learn to trust yourself

You: i want to have more faith in myself in others in the future i just worry the way i acheive this will only be a bandaid i want more than blind faith i want to see the world and see it as it is and still feel love and joy and trust the universe and myself to experience it correctly and even let go of the whole concept of correct.

Stranger: I also think I might fall asleep soon lol

You: thanks for listening i think i will too lol good luck i wish you all the best <£

You: <3

Stranger: That’s what I wish you too

Stranger: From the bottom of my heart

You: :-)

Stranger: Take care strangee

You: u 2 :-)

Stranger: Stranger*

[mothercetrion]

Safety

Summary:  A walk in the woods and a mild injury leads to a newfound closeness.

Characters: Erron Black, Kotal Kahn 

Word Count: 2012

Request: “How about some Kotalblack where, while out in the wilderness, Erron gets a leg injury. Nothing major, just enough to make walking difficult. Basically, I just want a fic where Koyal sweetly carries Erron around the entire time.” - anonymous

this is for you anon!! im sorry its many months late. i feel bad but it’s here!!! enjoy :) warning for really mild injury [crossposted to AO3]

---

“Thank you for offering to walk with me this evening, Erron.”

“Ain’t anythin’ big, Kotal. Just like the extra time with ya… I know you’re busy a lot.”

Kotal gently squeezed at Erron’s hand as they stepped over a fallen tree. “I am. That is why I am extra glad that you are here.”

Beneath Erron’s bandana, he was smiling.

The two of them had decided to embark on Kotal’s weekly walk in the Outworld jungle together one evening. It was the first time that both Kotal and Erron were free; endless new alliances between Outworld and other realms led to Kotal being a very busy man. He had little time to spend with his love.

Fortunately, their schedules had cleared up, and both of them were more than glad to walk together.

“Have you kept busy?” Kotal asked as they walked through a clearing.

“Here and there, making errands. Spending more time in Earthrealm than I would like to.” Erron sighed deeply. “Lots of Special Forces stuff. Lots of Cage and Cage Jr.”

Kotal chuckled to himself. “Those two are often a handful. A good amount of jokes between them.”

“Too many. They’re why I like it here more.” Erron looked up to Kotal. “Well, that, and… you’re here.”

Kotal smiled. He was glad that Erron was becoming more open with his compliments. It had taken a while of going out for Erron to drop his worries of it ending as quickly as it had started. It had been eons since Erron had been in a steady relationship (if he had ever been in one at all); he wasn’t used to the stability. Kotal was more than happy to hear him be more open.

They continued to walk for a while longer before stopping in a vast clearing of grass and trees. Kotal sat on the ground next to a tree and patted the ground next to him, and Erron sat down next to him, leaning back against the tree with a content sigh.

It was nice for them to be able to just take a break. Their lives had been so hectic for so long. They hadn’t even really a chance to breathe in days. It was nice to them to just sit in serenity, with one another and no one else to bother them. It was nice.

Erron leaned his head to rest on the side of Kotal’s arm. He wasn’t tall enough to reach his shoulder. “I’m glad that things are easing up.”

“As am I.” Kotal reached over a hand and placed it on Erron’s knee. “Perhaps you can finally spend more than a day in Outworld… We can just be with one another, like right now. Nothing sounds as blissful.”

Erron tugged at his bandana and pulled it off, and a small smile was on his face. “I would really like that… I really would.”

Kotal leaned down and pressed a tender kiss to his forehead. Erron lifted his head to kiss along his jaw, then the two met halfway and kissed properly. They pulled away quickly and smiled at one another, then they both leaned against the tree and rested their eyes. They had no intention of sleeping, but… it was so peaceful among those trees. Closing your eyes was the greatest way to take it in.

After a while, Erron moved to stand up with a grunt. “Hope you don’t mind… Need to use the restroom real quick,” he said quietly.

Kotal nodded with a smile. “Of course not, my sun. I understand.”

Erron walked off behind some bushes a good distance away from Kotal. Kotal continued to enjoy the peacefulness of the area around him while Erron was occupied. He adored nature, if he were to be honest. If he were stressed or needed some time to himself, he could step into nature for a while and just… take it all in. Breathe in the scent of the grass and the leaves, listen to the chirp of Outworldian birds, and perhaps even swim in a creek or lake or pond if he were to travel deep enough. He always took time to dedicate himself, his mind and his body, to the natural world around him.

His dedication was interrupted when he heard the snapping of several branches, followed by a very loud, “Fuck!”

Kotal immediately rose to his feet and hurried over to where Erron was located, being careful so he didn’t disturb him if he was still using the restroom. Much to his surprise, he saw Erron laying on the ground, his left foot stuck in a deep hole. He looked vastly uncomfortable and in pain… and pissed.

“These fuckin’ animals in these woods, diggin’ damn holes,” he grumbled. He looked up at Kotal. “I’m fine, honey. Just… Just fell down.”

“Do you need help getting up?” Kotal asked, squatting down so Erron did not have to strain his neck to see him. “You appear to be in pain.”

“My ankle’s hurtin’ but I doubt it’s anything bad.” Erron lifted his torso up so he was sitting on the ground, and he went to pull his leg from the hole but grunted in pain. He pushed past it and pulled it completely out of the hole, gritting his teeth and crying out. “Fuck… That hurt.”

“Let me assist you.” Kotal rose to his feet and grabbed at Erron’s arms, pulling him to his feet and helping him stand. Putting even a little weight on his foot caused Erron to wince, and Kotal immediately lifted him up by his elbows. “You are wounded. Sit down for a moment.”

He ushered Erron back over to the tree and helped him sit down, and he knelt in front of him and gently grabbed as his left foot. He went to remove Erron’s boot and stopped when the gunslinger winced. “I apologize… I must remove it to make sure that it is not broken,” he said quietly, offering Erron an encouraging smile. “I hate that it is distressing you.”

“It’s fine… No need to make a big fuss. It’s probably just sprained,” Erron replied hurriedly. “Just pull it off. I’ll be fine.”

Without much more of a warning, Kotal pulled the boot completely off of his foot and tossed it to the side. Erron could not help but cry out loudly, and he covered his mouth with his hand to hide his anguish. Kotal quietly apologized and removed his sock, investigating his ankle with furrowed brows. It was already beginning to swell, but it wasn’t severely disfigured.

“You were right. I believe it is sprained,” Kotal said quietly, “but it is a bad sprain nonetheless. It must be immobilized for a few days. Therefore… you cannot make the walk back home.”

Erron shook his head as Kotal worked to put his sock and shoe back on. “I’m making the walk. It just needs… It needs to be worked out. A little weight won’t kill it.”

Kotal looked up at him with a faint smile. “You are not a little man, my sun,” he teased.

Erron rolled his eyes and grabbed onto Kotal’s arm, pulling himself onto his good foot. “I promise, honey, I’ll be okay walking. You can hold my hand in case I fall, if that makes you feel any better.”

That’s exactly what Kotal did. Gripping tightly onto his hand, Kotal led Erron through the woods, allowing him to walk slowly as to not injure his ankle any further. Every step for Erron was painful, as evidenced by him tightening his hold on Kotal’s hand every time his foot touched the ground, in addition to his occasional whimper.

After nearly ten minutes of struggling, Kotal finally stepped in front of Erron and held out a hand to him, stopping him in place. “My sun, please stop. I cannot stand to see you hurt yourself further.”

Erron looked up at Kotal with furrowed brows. “I’m fine, Kotal. We’re gonna go home, and I’ll elevate it and ice it and everything. Swear on it.”

“I know you will,” Kotal said, “but you have been struggling to walk since we began our trek home. I know you are in pain.”

Before Erron could protest, Kotal leaned down and lifted Erron into his arms by his legs, settling him in his arms bridal style so he was comfortable. Erron immediately began pushing against his chest, trying to fight his way down. “Kotal, put me down. I can walk on my—”

“You are not allowed to walk until you rest your ankle,” Kotal said seriously. “Until then, I will carry you. Do not fight this.”

Erron let his head fall back as he groaned. But he didn’t complain further as Kotal began to carry him through the woods, walking gently as to not hurt his ankle. Erron eventually rested his head against his shoulder, taking in the scenery around them as they went on their way.

After a while, Erron closed his eyes and yawned heavily. Kotal looked at him and chuckled. “Are you tired?”

“You’re so warm,” Erron admitted, keeping his eyes closed, “and I ain’t having to walk… I ain’t gonna fall asleep though.”

“You’ve been very busy lately. I know you are exhausted, no matter what you say.” Kotal looked back to the pathway with a smile. “If you sleep, that is fine. I will take care of you upon our return.”

“I might catch a wink or two… if you insist.”

It didn’t take long for Kotal to look down and see Erron dozed off against his arm. For once, he did not look intense or on edge or anything. He looked… peaceful. Serene. Relaxed. More handsome than ever. 

Kotal walked even more slowly to be sure that Erron got his proper rest. He cared very deeply about the man he loved; every ounce of him wanted him to be safe and happy. Never in his life did he love a man so strongly. He wondered how he became so lucky as to have someone like him in his life.

Soon enough, Kotal had carried Erron completely through the woods and back to their living quarters. Upon entering their shared room, Kotal placed Erron down on their bed as gently as he could manage. He kneeled next to the bed and began removing his boot a second time, working carefully as to not disturb his ankle. 

But Erron was awakened just as his sock slipped off of his foot. He grimaced slightly and looked over at Kotal, and he smiled softly. “Hey,” he greeted.

“Hello.” Kotal turned his ankle and took note of its increased swelling. “I apologize for waking you. How do you feel?”

“Sore,” Erron replied truthfully. “Maybe, just maybe, I should’ve listened to you.”

Kotal let out a deep chuckle. “If only.” He gently rolled his ankle over and inspected it fully. “I still believe it is a bad sprain. I worry that my aid will not be enough to allow it to properly heal. You may need a medic.”

Erron shook his head hurriedly. “Not necessary. A few days of rest and ice will do me fine.”

Kotal lifted a brow in concern. “If you are sure, then I will not push it. But you must rest it. Promise me.”

Erron reached forward a hand towards Kotal. “Shake on it. You have my word.”

Kotal grabbed his hand and shook it gently. “Good. If you break your promise, I will not be pleased,” Kotal warned. Anyone could hear the joke in his voice.

Erron raised his hands. “Oh no, I’ll be in trouble if I break my promise? Scary,” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Kotal laughed loudly then. He climbed to his feet and sat on the edge of the bed, grabbing Erron’s hand. “I am glad that you are well, my sun. I must admit that I was worried.”

“No need to be.” Erron waved his free hand. “I’ve hurt myself worse. I, um… I appreciate it though. It means a lot.”

Kotal smiled at him. “Anytime, Erron.”

#kotal kahn #erron black #kotalblack #mortal kombat 11 #mortal kombat #fic #my fic #mine

[rogsclogs]

Some Day One Day (Brian May x Reader); part 11

Here’s a sweet and cheesy chapter for you all :) feedback is always welcomed  tag list: @brighter-thanthe-sky @im-a-sheerheartattack @fruityfreddie @discodeakygotmorerhythm @killer-queen-xo @destiel-stucky4ever-loki-queen @alfinaldelarcoiriss @warren-lauren @kazzish @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @avengerraven1023 @imgonnabeyourslave If you want to be added, please message me

Enjoy!

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part 1  part 2  part 3  part 4  part 5  part 6  part 7  part 8  part 9  part 10 

Neither of them remember exactly how things evolved from there, but at some point they found themselves tangled up in Brian’s silky sheets, with most of their clothes scattered all over his bedroom floor and their hands all over each other, like they depended on them to live. It was the first time they let things escalate, they were usually quick to fight the sexual tension between them that would often spark itself at the most inappropriate of times. But this time around it was just the two of them and a whole lotta love in the air, so there was no reason to stop, even though Brian asked Y/N about it multiple times, just wanting to make sure everything they did she was okay with.

She had obviously appreciated the thoughtfulness and caring side of Brian that always seemed to show when she needed it the most, but she was so head over heels for the man that she couldn't find a reason to wait any longer to let him have her.

She wanted him to have everything, her body and soul considering her mind had been his from the moment they'd first met. She wanted to feel his skin on her own and his lips gently caressing each inch of her figure, and somehow Brian knew exactly what she wanted and what she needed. It was the most passionate he’d ever been towards anyone, he wanted to be delicate yet rough when it was okay for him to be. 

It had been a while since the both of them had been intimate with anyone else, making things between them even more special and worthwhile. What Y/N loved the most was how simple everything seemed to be when he was around, she wasn't scared that she would mess something up, move the wrong way or say the wrong thing, he would love her no matter what and it was unusual for her to feel so secure in any relationship, but it came naturally with him.

It was always him and it would always be him to her, him consuming her every thought and every fantasy.

That was the best night of both their lives, they were completely consumed in each other, letting their bodies intertwine, their breaths mix and their hands shake together in pleasure. She had had dreams about that moment for a very long time, so the fact that she was living it in real life was kind of mind-blowing and so incredibly exciting. Neither of them could believe how far their relationship had come, but they were so grateful for it.

She swore she’d never felt as great as the moment she felt him inside her for the first time filling her up in a way she could only describe as heavenly, especially when he let out such sweet moans and sounds from his throat as he slipped into her.

They had spent the whole afternoon and most of the night like that, switching positions every once in a while and only taking short breaks in between. They were both on cloud nine, but Y/N was the one needing the love and pleasure the most after the mess her life had been in the last few months.

The only thing that sort of worried her wasn't the night of love making itself, but rather the morning after it.

How was she supposed to act around Brian? Would things be the same or would he act distant? But most importantly, did he want to seal the deal and actually be with her for good? It certainly seemed like it from the way he’d treated her in bed, but she didn't want to assume anything in order to avoid being hurt in case that's not what he wanted.

She was the first one to wake up the next morning as the light came in from the curtains.

She slowly turned her head around, finding Brian’s lanky figure right beside her, with his arms spread over the bedsheets in weird positions. He had fallen asleep holding her the previous night, but they had both moved around quite a while in their sleep, especially Y/N since her mind was sort of troubled and agitated. 

She tried to get the covers off her body without waking him up, he looked so peaceful and soft in the yellow morning light that she wanted to admire him for the rest of her life, but she also wanted to get up before him to make him some well deserved breakfast after how hard he’d worked to pleasure her the previous night.

He had done everything right, putting her needs and wants before his own like the real gentleman he was. He had gone down on her over and over again to make her see more stars than he had ever studied in his whole career, and he claimed it was his favorite thing to do in bed, as looking up at her in such a vulnerable state with her eyes closed and her mouth parted open in fulfillment was better than any orgasm of his life. Except probably the one he’d had inside her, nothing in the world could beat that feeling, even though they were careful and used protection. The last thing he wanted was to risk getting her pregnant now that her life seemed to be going exactly where she wanted it to go.

He had done so much for her that the least she could do to show how grateful she was, was to fix him breakfast.

So she stole the shirt he had been wearing the previous day, which still held onto his sweet cologne, and put her panties back on, after looking for them for quite some time. She couldn't remember where Brian had thrown them, she just remembered the hunger and desire in his eyes when he did so. 

The kitchen table was full of toasted bread, fresh fruit, steaming coffee and homemade croissants when Brian joined Y/N at around 9 am. He wouldn't have to be at school until around one in the afternoon so he had all the time in the world to enjoy both his breakfast and his girlfriend, and Y/N knew it.

“You didn't have to do all of this, my love” where some of the first words he spoke to her, which also calmed her nerves a lot. Maybe he did want to be with her still, after all. He seemed to be very relaxed and in a great mood, so why was Y/N still a bit skeptical about his feelings for her? Why wasn't she able to accept that someone truly loved her? 

“I wanted to, last night was one of the best of my life” she said, making a cheeky grin appear on Brian’s unshaved face. She loved a bit of facial hair on him, and she loved it even more when his head was between her legs. It was pure ecstasy.

“Oh yeah, was it now? I’m very glad to hear that baby, the feeling is mutual”.

He couldn't keep his eyes off her body for long, she just looked magnificent with bare legs and his shirt to cover the top half of her incredible body that he already wanted to have another round. She also looked well fucked, which was incredibly sexy and definitely something he could get used to waking up to.

“You look amazing this morning love, I should keep you up all night more often” her already swollen and reddened cheeks got even darker from embarrassment, making Brian let out a soft laugh and pull her in to sit on his lap from the back of her warm thighs. 

She was just the most beautiful person he’s ever laid his eyes on, and even while they ate he always kept a hand somewhere on her body, to remind both her and himself that they belonged together. 

Still, he could sense that there was something going on inside her mind, she was a little tense as she sat on his boney knees and he couldn't figure out what could possibly be making her behave like that after the night they’d just shared.

“Everything okay Y/N? You seem a bit off”

“I’m fine, I just... this is gonna sound so stupid”

“Nothing you say could ever be stupid” he said encouragingly 

“Well, I.. I just, I’m not sure how to act around you right now” she said, making a dumbfounded look appear on Brian’s only half awake face.

“What do you mean?” He asked as he slowly started rubbing her right arm in a comforting way, the last thing he wanted was to spark another discussion between them, and he was willing to do everything in his power to make her happy.

“I don’t know what last night meant to you Brian, but it seriously meant the world to me. You mean the world to me, and I guess I am just scared that you won’t be interested in actually being with me, I don't even know why I feel this way, it’s just-”

“Hey, hey, Y/N, calm down, okay? Breathe” he lightly joked to ease some of the anxiety building up in her head.

He went to massage her shoulders with his big hands, making the girl gently moan in pleasure and throw her head back to lay on his chest.

“I don't know what brought these thoughts into your pretty head, but you gotta tell them to shut up, okay? Stop doubting my feelings for you, I know you don't mean to do that, but still. You need to trust me baby girl, I love you and yes, I want to be with you, day and night and the day after that and then the night after that and so on. I love you, I love you, I love you. Believe my words and my action, don't trust your intrusive thoughts, alright?”

His words left her speechless, no one had ever taken into account her overbearing intrusive thoughts when talking to her, but Brian understood as he always did. He knew she didn't mean to doubt him or his feelings, and he knew that she didn't mean to come off as unloving when she distanced herself from him, it was all in her head and she didn't know how to stop those thoughts. But she didn't need to, because Brian fully understood.

All she did after that was turn around on his lap so she could hug him tightly, then she placed her forehead on his shoulder and closed her eyes as his extremely warm hands worked their way under her (his) shirt to rub her back reassuringly.

That morning was pure bliss for them, especially because right after breakfast Brian carried Y/N straight back into his bedroom and they spent the next two hours fucking each other recklessly once again.

Their bliss lasted pretty much until the last available minute, until Brian really had to leave if he wanted to make it to school on time. Y/N was able to stay behind, finally being done with the test meant not having any more classes for a couple of weeks at least, so Brian had told her to take it easy and make herself at home, then he had promised to be home early, before Emily was done at daycare, so that they could have some more alone time. 

As she walked around his apartment by herself for the first time, Y/N felt the happiest she had ever been: she was spending most of her time with a man she loved in their little safe nest, her academic career was finally taking off and there wasn't a single burden in her life, which was a new and strange feeling to her, but definitely something she was starting to let herself take in.

The afternoon flew by relatively quickly, after all she only stayed by herself for a little over four hours so it wasn't a big deal.

She cooked herself some pasta with vegetables for lunch and poured herself a glass of wine to go with it, then she sat in Brian’s studio for a while to read one of the many books he had written that she knew she would have to study once her master program would begin. It was all about the Milky Way formation and evolution, and she was once again blown away by how incredibly smart and well spoken Brian really was, even in written form. She suddenly felt a wave of pride run over her, which she had never felt before, but all of a sudden she cared more about his accomplishments than she did her own. He really was the best part of her.

After a while, she got bored of reading so she put away his book and grabbed his guitar instead, the one she’d admired from afar many times before. Brian had been very clear that she was more than welcomed to play it if she so desired, but it had been so long since the last time she’d even handled a guitar that she didn't feel like making a fool out of herself in front of him, who she knew very well was a sort of guitar god.

However, in that moment she was alone, so she decided to give in to her urges and place the instrument on her lap, gently stroking the strings with her fingers and humming a song by Bob Dylan, one of her favorite songwriters of all times.

She must have lost track of time from there, because when Brian finally got back home, he found her in that very same position, on his bed with her legs tucked beneath her body and softly playing his beloved guitar while only wearing his oversized shirt.

That sight made his heart so happy that he felt like he could start crying.

He swiftly placed his bag on the floor and started undressing himself, making the girl giggle in the most adorable way.

“Well, someone’s eager” Brian couldn't even find it in himself to reply with a witty comment like he normally would have, he simply pulled all bis clothes off except his underwear, then took the guitar from Y/N’s lap and placed it on the floor so he could safely push her back into his mattress and climb over her body with his own, kissing her deeply and making her feeling how needy he was and how much he’d missed her during the day.

#Some Day One Day #Brian May #Brian May x reader #brian harold may #brian may imagine #Queen #queen fandom #queen x reader #queen fic #queen imagines #queen band #imagine #borhap #borhap fandom #writeblr #fan fiction writer #fan fiction

[ohmyuqi]

Ｗｈｅｎ Ｉ ｗａｓ ｙｏｕｒ ｍａｎ

 When I was you man (Lucas x Reader)

genre: Angst, sad fluff

summary: “I was fool with the delusion of deserving a love like yours.”

an: im so sorry.

playlist: “when I was your man” - bruno mars

“y si fuera ella?” - alejandro sanz

“it will rain” - bruno mars

“talking to the moon” - bruno mars 

“photograph” - ed sheeran 

“chasing cars” - snow patrol

“cuando me enamoro” - enrique iglesias y juan luis guerra

“just give me a reason” - pink 

(order doesn’t matter)

________________________________________________________________

While lucas is moving out your shared apartment he finds a polaroid of you two and decides to write you a letter.

________________________________________________________________

Empty, desolate, different.

Lucas couldn’t believe his eyes, once an apartment full of life, love and a promising future turned into well, this. 

He started wistfully at the leather couch he would have to call Mark to help him move. The same couch where you guys had you first kiss.

The same couch you guys would spend hours cuddling and watching tv together, enjoying life for what it was. What you made it to be. 

The same couch where you would discuss how you guys would spend the rest of your lives together. Where you lay when your future kids frolicked in your future house. 

What you and Lucas had was ethereal, special. Unlike anything either of you had felt before. 

His love felt new and exciting but comforting and familiar. 

He felt different and new, albeit it also felt you knew him all your life. 

You both used to spend every living moment with each other. You could never get tired of him just like he could never get tired of you. At least that’s what you thought up until a couple months ago. 

When you realized that his smile didn’t light up when he saw you like it used to. He didn’t hold you like he used to, things were shifting. 

The dawn would flow into your room through your windows and he wasn’t there. 

When you talked you didn’t talk, just reassurances of love. 

Friday nights you would end up all alone, talking to the moon and your bedroom walls. The ones where you hung pictures of both of you actually in love. 

Friday nights where Lucas was hanging out with his “friends”, then later coming home smelling like a French Whore. 

You felt like were going mad without him, life felt so dull and different. You were alone. At times it felt like Lucas was all you had, now even he was slipping through your frail hands. 

You would spend nights on end wondering what you were doing wrong. 

You tried so hard to satisfy him. You loved him unconditionally, you tried to make him feel better on the days when life would beat him up. You supported him through all his decisions, whether you agreed or not. You even dressed yourself up to try to impress him. 

After a while you knew it was useless, in the beginning you could be in a stained hoodie with your hair a mess and he wouldn’t care. All he could see was that blinding smile and those charming eyes. 

One day you decided to let all trust out the window and test him, to this day a little part of you wishes you hadn’t. 

You shoved your keys in your purse making sure everything you needed was there. Your eyes trailed to Lucas, standing at the door. A juicebox and a pb and j sandwich in a paper bag securely held by his sure hands. 

You walked over to him and gave him a big great hug. It was painful, you knew this would be the last one. You stayed in his comforting arms for longer than usual, relishing its bitter sweetness. 

He handed you the small bag and took your crumbling face in his hands. “Don’t cry, princess. Your interview will be fine. If they reject you they don’t deserve the little jem they let slip through their hands.” He placed a light kiss on your head. 

How hypocritical of you, Lucas. 

You told him the interview would be very tedious process and you would probably be home very late. Late enough for him to speak his truths.

You waited a couple hours, oh how long those hours. Waited ‘till it felt right. 

You left your car as quietly as possible, opening the door knob, fingers trembling. 

All you could hear were your painful heart beats and lingering doubts troubling your heart. 

You looked around in the messy apartment, its appearance reflecting your peace of mind. 

You kept looking, nothing seemed out of place. Not a sound was heard either. 

A little bud of hope flourished in your tearing heart, just waiting to put you back together. 

You walked to the room that you and Lucas shared, once a place of love corrupted by ignorance. 

You stopped, fingers inches away at the knob. You were itching to know the truth, but at the same time you knew your ignorance was bliss. 

But you couldn’t live on like this, your heart wouldn’t be able to take it. 

You pulled open the door and their it was, the truth was staring blankly back at you. Yet, for some reason, you couldn’t believe it. You didn’t want to. 

In that second in time, Lucas didn’t break your heart. He took it, crushed it, stepped on it and spit on it. 

Dark oceans of regret stared back you, not a word. 

The silence was deafening, you wished he said something. Anything, any excuse to keep you. 

The part that truly broke you was the fact that he didn’t even try. He didn’t try to keep you, he didn’t do anything. 

Your eyes brimming with tears, you yelled at the top of your lungs. 

“SAY SOMETHING, ANYTHING.”  You grabbed him by his broad shoulders, waking up the woman laying soundly next to him. 

You yelled at him until your voice broke and your throat burned with all the truths you wished you spoken earlier. You pushed and slapped him weakly. 

You went crazy, you quite literally snapped. 

You stared at the woman next to him, she watched you both with guilty eyes. You didn’t know who she was and you didn’t care. 

“Get out of my house.” 

She stared at you for a second, clearing her throat and her eyes trailing to her bare body covered by sin and a thin, white sheet. 

“I said get out of my house.” This time you made sure you put all the pain and hatred in your command. Poison seething through your trembling lips. 

She took the sheet and made sure she was covered. Taking her purse and her last sliver of dignity out the door. 

You picked a red thong from the floor. Making sure you didn’t actually touch the filthy garment. 

“Is this some kind of cruel joke?” Unlike the unknown mistress, he had no dignity to spare. There was quite literally nothing he could say to fix this. 

He couldn’t lie his way out of this one, he couldn’t kiss it and make it better. 

You threw the dirty thing at him. “You’re a piece of literal dog shit, rot in hell.” 

That’s when he burst at the seams, all this wrongdoing and guilt getting to his decrepit mind. 

He watched as you rushed out the door, hair trailing like the fiery burning in your heart. 

He knew in him what he did was wrong, but he was blinded by lust and lies. 

How utterly cruel of you to blame him for his big heart. How absolutely wicked of you to hate him for blaming him for something he can’t control. How terrible of you for leaving him and not accepting that he is human and makes mistakes.

Anything, he clawed for reasons to hate you. He had all these ‘reasons’, yet he couldn’t find it in him to hate you. 

Walking into the room everything came back to him. It wreaked of alcohol and regret. 

The bed was bare and the old bed sheets were ashes in a near by forest. 

He looked around in the vacant shell of a home. He looked to his left and there it was, just like he remembered. It was a Polaroid of your first date at the amusement park. Even if it was your first date both of you knew it was love. But just like anything, love dies in negligence. 

He had a big cheesy smile, oozing with love. While you were lightly pecking his sun kissed cheek. A small droplet landed on the picture, rubbing salt in the wound. 

He picked a pen of your coffee table and took out a sheet of paper.  

 Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now.

When our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down

'Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name 

Mm, too young, too dumb to realize That I should have bought you flowers And held your hand Should have gave you all my hours When I had the chance Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life Now I never, never get to clean up the mess I made.  And it haunts me every time I close my eyes. Although it hurts

I'll be the first to say that I was wrong. 

I know I'm probably much too late

To try and apologize for my mistakes But I just want you to know, 

hope he buys you flowers I hope he holds your hand Give you all his hours When he has the chance Take you to every party 'Cause I remember how much you loved to dance Do all the things I should have done When I was your man Do all the things I should have done When I was your man. 

Ps. I don’t deserve you, don’t come back to me. 

Attaching the picture to the letter after snapping a picture of it on his phone, signing off the past to you. Letting go and accepting his mistakes. 

“I was fool with the delusion of deserving a love like yours.”  

#lucas #nct lucas #lucas nct #lucas x reader #lucas wong #lucas angst #wong yukhei #lucas fluff #lucas smut #nct #nct 127 #nct u #nct dream #nct imagines #nct mark #mark lee #mark x reader #johnny seo #johnny x reader #jungwoo #jungwoo x reader #lucas icon #lucas imagines #nct icons #jaehyun #jaehyun x reader #taeyong #nct taeyong #taeyong x reader

[stateofgrace-acoustic]

lover - first song ranking & thoughts

first of all i just need to say i legitimately don’t feel ‘meh’ about a single song on this album. on any other album. i always had one or two songs i was just kind of ‘take it or leave it’ about. but Lover really did that - they’re all amazing and wonderful. but here’s an attempt at an order of how much i love them!

18. it’s nice to have a friend

this really reminds me of you are in love in the way it recounts all the small gestures and steps involved in becoming close to somebody. it’s really cute and at the perfect space on the album, leading to daylight. not a mindblowing song or anything, but the vibe fits onto lover really well. i’m glad that it’s here 

17. you need to calm down

yeah, i cooled down on this one a little bit. it’s fun and the message is important, but me! is the better single tbh. still though, the feeling of empowerment this gives me over my nonexistent online haters is wonderful. and i love the attitude of the song of just looking at the assholes who live their entire lives putting energy into hating people and just being like....why are you like this. it’s pathetic. calm the hell down. so needed in our current debate culture

16. me!

a real grower! taylor and brendon urie have such good chemistry, tbh that’s really the backbone of the song. it’s just a really nice carefree spring/summertime self love song, a perfect soundtrack for when you feel happy and content with yourself. 

15. the man

just dropping the complete truth on us with this one. i’ve wanted taylor to make this song for years (and i know she said she’s been wanting to but just never found the right words!) the bridge really elevates this too. and it’s sad how relatable the entire song is in literally every aspect of professional (and personal) life for women. i don’t think it’s quite as strong as it could have been, but still really solid

14. i think he knows

this is like the fun version of dress. that’s all i got to say. just as explicit, but this time around it’s super cheeky and i love it. also goals of self confidence if i’ve ever seen them

13. paper rings

the joyful energy this has!! just makes you smile and want to dance immediately, a wonderful wholesome happy bop

12. false god

listen.....this is special. i absolutely think this is the most experimental song on the album, both in terms of the music (is that a saxophone in the bg?? it’s almost got a jazzy vibe? completely uncomparable to anything she’s ever done and still so distinctly Taylor), but also with the lyrics, where she goes into the love = religion theme which honestly....as a Florence + the Machine and Hozier fan, i don’t even need to go into how much of a vibe that is. I couldn’t have imagined it working so well for Taylor though, but honestly, this song feels perfectly brooding, summertimey, melancholy, - it’s almost like taking the darker underside of Cruel Summer and exploring it in depth! this is very much a song i need to be in a Specific Mood to really appreciate, but it’s damn well made

11. afterglow

i love the maturity of this. not just the apologizing for picking a fight, but explaining how it came to be - at the end, from a place deep seated anxiety. ‘it’s all me, in my head’ (those high notes are beautiful) you can really feel how sorry she is. at the same time, the song sounds like something bigger, like an anthem - almost like that place high above that she’s trying to elevate them to.

10. i forgot that you existed

SO MUCH FUN i keep repeating that but that’s just the mood of this album tbh, playful and mature at the same time. this song is just like, when you’re over someone but you just can’t help yourself and have to throw shade one last time before moving on. i love the bouncy beat!!

9. lover

this song is literally the feeling of ‘home’ in music. so cozy, comfortable, blissful. dreamy. perfect title track. also completely timeless - i think this is one of those songs that we will look back on in years as a classic in her catalogue, a song you will always want to play again

8. the archer

this was my definite favorite of the pre released songs. anxiety, doubts, the way they all just keep coming back and eating at you, it’s described so perfectly and painfully. and the production really makes it sound like you’re in a separate space from reality, just stuck in your head trying to find a way forward, to soothe yourself. the ‘they see right through me / i see right through me’ transition in the bridge is fantastic and keeps giving me chills. so much personal connection to this one

7. soon you’ll get better

feels weird to even rank this but......just wow. the harmonies with the dixie chicks are so beautiful, and the way the lyrics talk about the feeling between denial and desperate hope, the transition from “because you have to” to “because I have to” - I have to cling to this hope, or i won’t make i - it completely broke my heart. and the fact that Taylor can conjure all these complex emotions with just a guitar and a few words is incredible. i’m so so sorry for them and i wish all the best for Andrea with my entire heart. 

6. london boy

i already see people underappreciating this, what is going on??? there are multiple cute bouncy joyful songs on this album but this is my favorite because it’s just got a fantastic flow and melody, and i love all of the references to places and dialect specific words and it’s just so wholesome?? but what really makes this is (once again) the bridge. stick with ME im your QUEEN like a tennessEE stella mccartNEY, just the energy!! the fun!! excuse me while i listen to this every day for the rest of my life

5. miss americana & the heartbreak prince

okay, taylor’s brain in this one. i made a post talking about how this song has three layers - at first there’s the high school setting, then it references the ‘cancelling’ of Taylor’s public persona, but then it can also be seen as a comment on US politics and the whole climate of society right now. and it’s all tied together perfectly because high school is the perfect metaphor for this!! she’s basically saying we’re all behaving like immature school children, bullying each other for the stupidest reasons, mob mentality, stupid contests, fabricated stories made up to tear people down, and the feeling of loneliness but also fear and horror that comes with all that for the people who are the victims of it.....it’s literally all like high school in the worst way. i just love this concept, and the melody and production give me a little bit of a reputation vibe almost? which is perfect for the song, the dark dramatic vibe shows the feeling of fear most of all and that’s just....too real. 

4. death by a thousand cuts

........listen, i surely didn’t think that Taylor would write one of her best breakup songs in the year of our lord 2019, but here we are. it’s once again, the small moments she recounts. taking the long way home. the uncertainty if it will ever be fine again. and the bridge/second verse / whatever that part is but that entire part. ‘paper cuts from my paper thin plans’, excuse me. the fact that she wrote this about a movie where a couple breaks up after years really shows tbh, because it’s especially that kind of....not being able to find a part of yourself that isn’t influenced by the other person, that’s so horrible and makes moving on so painful. i also love the production which makes this sound so uptempo, contrasting the lyrics! idk the entire song just clicks into place for me

3. daylight

this is like a summary of the entire album (and with the reference to the past and especially red, it’s even connecting her entire discography together). it’s like the clean of this album, except this time around it feels more complex - all the subtle references to past mistakes, ghosts, that might not be so easy to wash away. i’ve already mentioned that i love about the album (and this song especially) how it doesn’t gloss over negative experiences but addresses them directly, like looking them in the eye and then saying ‘you don’t have the power to define me’. that’s what this song feels like - it’s not unabashedly celebratory, it’s actually quite melancholic, but also full of real healing, a feeling of peace and reconciliation. and the ‘i once believed love would be black and white / burning red, but it’s golden’.....excuse me.....how dare she

2. cornelia street

god, what a magical song. the kind of episodic buildup that Taylor excels at. the vibrancy of the production matching the vibrancy of the relationship as it develops, revolving around this one place in its multiple stages, and then the repeated, deep seated fear of losing all that. it’s just. ugh. what can i even say. and so so catchy. the “listen..” killed me. just like delicate, the vibe between fear and being drunk on happiness is so so well done.

1. cruel summer

oh yes. and here we have an absolute perfection of a pop song. incredible catchiness. smart, clever lyrics but also that underlying vibe of sadness and anxiety. seriously, the complexity this has?? and then that soaring bridge, the chaotic but beautiful but painful reality of all of it coming together. ‘i love you, ain’t that the worst thing you ever heard?’ idk this song just transcends everything for me friends. it’s like the vibe of out of the woods or maybe even style but the lyrics are even more sharp, they cut a little deeper, literally ‘summer’s a knife’. this is a song she only could’ve written influenced by reputation: there’s happiness but there’s that edge in it too. idk if anything i’m saying makes sense. i love this song so so so much. 

#lover #taylor swift #vanessa talks #lowkey an album review lmao

[courtorderedcake]

Hi! Thanks for tagging me in the WiP game. Your titles look quite interesting. Im curious about: A Crown of Buttercups, A Curse of Wings. Is it an EF AU?

Is it an EF AU?

Not exactly. 

This piece was written as part of my HALLOW anthology series that I originally intended to post for CSSNS, but ended up leaving on the back burner due to work, life, and stress. It is a retelling of the Six Swans from fairytale lore, where Emma is the singled out child tasked with the curse of breaking the curse on her siblings. 

An excerpt from my outline :

The only way to save them is to sew six shirts of buttercups (ORIGINALLY ASTERS) over six years without speaking. She sings instead.She climbs into a tree in the forest and begins to knit/craft these shirts together. ((Goes to a tree or meadow everyday to knit?))One day, the king of this kingdom ((Killian)) is hunting in the forest. His hunters find the girl in the tree and ask her who she is.  ((Maybe instead, he courts her? And visits everyday, much to her annoyance?)) 

((Family: August, Robin, Snow, Ruby, Will, Merida )) ((Henry as the son or possibly a fae counterpart, page?))

((Royalty: Killian, Liam (dead), Cora as the Evil Queen (killed the Queen/Liam to usurp the throne), David, Jefferson, Graham = Hunters, Belle as Emma’s handmaiden, Mulan as her guard, Princess Regina as Killian’s close (And jealous) childhood friend who eventually warms to Emma. ))

EXCERPT I: Intro

Once upon a time, as so many stories begin, there was a man and his wife who loved each other very much. They could not have their own children, much to their deep regret, and set to living in the deep woods to live a quiet life. Every evening they’d walk together hand in hand, a tried and true path through the wood and around the streams and ponds that unseen creatures called home. The couple knew the woods were as old as time, and respected them as such; they left gifts of sweets, bread, and any other offerings they could spare.

The wrath of the wood and what lived within was not a kind.

One night, as evening fell with its profound grace, they returned to their cabin to find a wailing child on their step. Pale as milk and beautiful, they took him in as their own. When it happened again after 2 years, their beautiful son toddling along the path to the squall of another child, they celebrated further. The husband was so overjoyed that he built on to the small house, and the wife extended her garden. They left more gifts to appease those in the wood.

Another child, and another, and another and then one more appeared at their door and their house grew with the many smiling faces they raised. Though they did not suckle at the woman’s breast, she was there’s in everything but blood. She would fight for her children to a bitter end.

On the full moon that rose over the summer swell, the wife felt the sharp pain of labor in her back, her body bowing to its need to push. Her husband and her surprise at the child that had grown unknown in her belly caught them unaware as they tried to keep both baby and mother alive. There was only one survivor.

The baby was a beautiful child, a girl with bright eyes the color of moss and clover.

The husband buried his wife, becoming the father.

His family became his world, watching his children grow into beautiful children, and then almost adults. The children would soon have to leave the nest. On their long evening walk, the Father made a wish most Fathers make:

I wish my children would not leave the nest.

The wood listens. The wood and those within it listen well.

They returned to their home, all but one falling asleep. The youngest child climbed high, out of the loft and the haphazard but cozy add ons of their home, out into fresh air and a blanket of midnight silk and twinkling diamonds. She sat and watched like she liked to, the quiet blissful and serene. It was hard being the youngest in some ways, the small voice under the loud cacophony of her siblings.

She heard them even now, their shouts breaking the silence. Something was wrong.

She climbed back down into the house, down to where her siblings and father were yelling and light was shining brighter than any candle.

A woman stood, wings spread and body swathed in spider silk. Her voice boomed through the house like thunder and the light pulsed brighter.

“Your wish has been granted, they will remain.”“NO! No this is not what I meant!” The Father cried, but the gift had been given, the children given by fae taking fae form. The woman looked at him with bewilderment.

“You do not like my gift? Is this not what you wished for?”

“No, I wish there was a way to fix this!”

“A gift given cannot be undone by the giver. And you are the one who wished it.”

The youngest child, with bright green eyes and golden hair, jumped from her perch to stand before the woman. She was without fear, brash fury and courage.

“You were silent as a mouse, little one! To you I will give this task, but be warned, to take back my gift for siblings 6 will take great effort.”

The child did not falter, her eyes gleaming emeralds.

“Then you, little one, quiet swan on still waters, you will be silent, unless in song, until my gift is returned.”

The child felt something taken from her, and she grasped her throat. No sound came out when she opened her mouth.

“My sweet soundless child, your task is not done. To save your siblings from their fate, you must sew them garments of buttercups. You must swim in my spring with a stranger to you. Finally, you must dance with every full blue moon.”

A bright glow filled the room once more, a buttercup appearing on the child’s wrist.

The winged woman disappeared in a silver mist.

And so a gift was given, or a curse was cast, the tasks set to return her siblings to normal. For only at night did they retain a semblance of their human form, in the day’s sun they flew.

So she sewed. Buttercup after buttercup sewn into small rows,held tight with soft thread. Days went by as she weaved yellow flowers together in silence, only broken in the still of the night, when her family changed to their true forms. Their Father passed, filled with guilt over his mistake. They did all to assure him he was forgiven and loved. Pain filled their house for many months.

One night she found that she could sing and started humming to her family’s delight. In the lonely sunshine of the next day, she raised her voice, surrounding herself in songs that her father had sang to her, and her mother had sung before that. Days turned into months, months turned into years, with only a shirt and a half to show for it.

Her family changed. They all grew taller, with skin the color of cream and pale cheeks with the slightest blush. The girls were full of grace, a soft sway in their movements now. The boys grew unafraid and brash, used to fighting air currents and diving into dark waters to bring Emma gifts. They learned languages from different cultures, observed storytellers in markets, saw new foods being made, and listened to lectures in the monasteries on the sciences.

There were more somber silences as they discussed a future, but they told Emma stories of their flights over the many lands she could not see. Over time, her silence became a language they could understand, her looks or dismissive body language a code they easily cracked.

Occasionally, Emma would find her fingers bleeding or her eyes tired from making minute stitches. Her siblings would fuss over her.

“Emma,” Snow whispered, quietly rubbing a salve Will had made on her bleeding fingers. ”You don’t have to do this. You could go live your life, we would understand.”

Emma sighed, and gave her a look. I’d never do that. You are my family, and this is my home.

Emma changed. Gone was the girl. She grew taller, her hair flowed out in sun bleached strands of gold. Her days spent sewing under the canopy of the forest left her subtly kissed with peach, in contrast to her pale siblings. She was lean muscle, quiet, serious, focused drive, with one goal in sight: Save her family.

EXCERPT II :

Prince Killian hated hunting. He went out of duty and tradition, but found himself bored the entire time. This trip was an exception, however. With his closest friends in tow, he was heading out to celebrate his last days of freedom before meeting his betrothed and his coronation. The forest that sprawled across the west of his kingdom was full of life: deer, rabbits, pheasant, grouse, wild turkeys, boar, and other various game animals. They were relatively untouched in the old woods, the animals fattened and unaware of the threat of hunters. Not only was hunting not a challenge, but it felt almost too easy.

He was joined by David, one of his very good friends and a lord of Southernmost Barrens; Jefferson, a court musician well known for his flamboyant nature; and Graham, a friend of Killian’s for years who was one of the best hunters the land was blessed with. Only Graham and David seemed excited by the prospect of catching anything. Jefferson was content to enjoy fine wine and get away from the ladies of the court, and Killian… the only consolation of this excursion was a reprieve from castle life, and his step mother.

After his brute of a father’s sudden death, peace had been held by his brother, Liam. When Liam had died unexpectedly, Killian had been given the crown, but being unmarried, the Queen Mother helped him rule with an iron fist. A few weeks away from her and her revulsion for commoners felt well deserved.

He held his face up to the forest sky, it’s green leaves creating a canopy over them, and leaned back in the saddle. It was warm out, an early spring after a cold and long winter. Color was a welcome relief to his eyes. They came to a small glen where towering oaks broke to shower a glade with sunlight. They were deep in the forest, the trees ancient and tall. When his mother was alive, she had warned him this was the type of place the Wee Folk hid, witches lived, and the spirits of the wood moved between realms.

“Here looks good,” David said, hopping off his mount. There were some low lying berry bushes, a small stream, and a dogwood that dropped petals like snow. They undid the saddle bags of their horses, stretching after the ride. After a camp was roughly set, they separated, drawing their bows and arrows. They would meet back in the clearing after a successful hunt, or if unsuccessful would gather firewood, water, mushrooms, sweet onion, or young shoots to use later. Graham was insistent that no hunt or trek was truly unsuccessful. Killian set off following the stream as it widened into a creek.

He hadn’t walked long before he heard it. A song lilting on the breeze, rustling through boughs and thicket. The beautiful tune was not familiar to his ears; sad and mournful, but somehow full of hope. Following the melody to a small pond the creek emptied into, sunlight gleamed and sparkled off of its surface, and the tune mixed with the babble of the water took his breath away. He could vaguely make out the words:

‘Fire, earth, water, air,I did have 6 siblings fair,now they glide through the sky,and left all alone am I’

Stepping closer to the water, the song stopped abruptly.

Looking around he could find no source of the beautiful music. A siren or fae creature, maybe? He began to wash his face in the pond, one hand reaching for a dagger in his boot. If a creature hunted him he was prepared. As he touched the handle a flicker of movement caught his eye on the water’s surface. Killian was shocked to see green eyes and a tangle of blonde hair in the reflection of the crystal pool staring at him. He turned, staring at the blonde woman holding a bundle of buttercups, her lithe form almost entirely concealed by the canopy of the tree.

They stared at each other and she tensed, curling her body into the tree with her head peeking out to watch him warily.

”Who are you?”

She didn’t answer and simply stared at him with eyes the color of the forest.

“What are you doing here?” He had to be hallucinating, or this was a Fae creature using it’s beauty to trick him or steal his soul. He continued to press her, knowing Fae were compelled to answer. “Are you all right?”

Her gaze blew through him, a flicker of something in her face as she cocked her head slowly to the right. Killian’s mother had told him Fae were compelled to answer riddles, should he ever need to face one.

“No one can see me or catch me in their palms. I spread the noisy sound of my voice quickly through the world; I can break to pieces the oak with my loud, crashing strength, as I beat against the high poles of the sky and traverse the fields.” He said, reciting from memory his tutor’s favorite riddle. The woman looked confused for a short moment, then narrowed her eyes. She stepped back, completely covered by leaves and out of sight.

Killian shouted after her, “Wait! I’m sorry -” Shock radiated through him as he watched her swing her body easily to a higher branch, staring down at him from her perch.

Her silence chilled him. She shifted, letting her legs hang, her dress far shorter than he was used to in the courts. He could feel his face flush. She tugged at the hem when she saw where his gaze fell, and her face and chest flushed pink. She looked away from him, chewing her lip.

”Do you need help getting down…?” That caused her gaze to snap back at him, and she shook her head no furiously. She opened her mouth to say something, but after a long pause, pursed her lips with a sigh. He moved under the tree, his hand pressed against the bark. She was still far above him, but he could see her well worn dress was a faded jade, bleached to mint. It was decades out of fashion, and looked to be made for a child. Her hair was tangled gold with curls springing wildly.

“I didn’t mean to frighten you.” He said softly.

She gave him a sad, pleading look, and made a shooing motion. Her face almost looked pained.

”Can’t you speak?” Her gaze was green fire, sunlight through a piece of sea glass. She shook her head no, and glared at him. “Alright, look, I’ll leave you be then. I just… We’re staying in the clearing over at the mouth of the stream. If you want to be left alone, stay clear of us. We’ll give you a wide berth.”

Her face softened, and she cocked her head to the side again, moving forward. He watched her slowly climb down the tree, until she stood only a few feet in front of him.

“I’m…” He hesitated. She would know who he was if he said his name. “Jones.” He said reaching out a hand. She didn’t take it, and shrank away at his movement. He noticed that she clutched a garment made of flowers to her protectively. Maybe she was one of the Drue, or a Nymph?

EXCERPT III :

David stood as she stepped into the moonlight. Her eyes flashed under a shock of long brown hair dusted in silver, and a white slip of a gown stuck to her body. A flash of silver shined in her hand, as two tall men crept out of the wood to support her. They were all graceful in their movements, gliding towards him. David began to believe he was dreaming as they glistened, somehow dusted in silvers and opalescent mother of pearl on their skin and hair.The point of a dagger rested under his chin, the stunning woman before him staring up at him.

“You owe a debt to me. Help me. I need medicine.” Her voice was lilting, and he felt his mouth go dry as long lashed eyes glinted blue green. David’s heart skipped, and he remembered Killian’s words in shock.

“Who… Who are you?” it came out in a stutter. She smiled, and the men behind her shifted uncomfortably.

“Call me… Blanche.” she whispered, lowering the dagger and cocking her head slightly. “It’s nice to finally meet you David.”

His name from her lips electrified him, and he understood. He would do anything for this woman.

She extended a hand, and he took it with wonder.

As she lead him away, he didn’t notice her companions move towards their palace.

#WIP #aloha-4-ever #WIP game #Courtorderedcake #My writing #A Crown of buttercups #A Curse of Wings #send me an ask #These are all like #23k one shots #send halp #I need someone to finish what I start

[sinners0prayer]

hatterized

lmao you know i love negan but i feel i can bring forth my salt to you so i just gotta say I agree that something went wrong with negan, and it was them doing the typical tv show thing of having to make each villain bigger and badder. Except...negan was never more evil than the governor. the gov is objectively the WORST kind of bad guy in the comics and they (thankfully) toned him down in the show

First of all salt is a welcome addition to any meal. 

Second, I can’t really pinpoint what went wrong. I was always fine with the changes, making him more evil, like that was fine. But all the ways they went about it, while still trying to point us towards his fate in the comics, it’s like, you can’t have your cake and eat it too. 

Either you make Negan a villain unable to be redeemed, or you give him just enough to redeem him. And I’m sorry, Negan’s little chitchat with Gabriel didn’t tug on the mercy strings for me. (Don’t get me wrong, I want Jail Cell Negan like right NOW, but I want it to make sense) 

I’m just VERY confused at what they’re doing. If Chandler is leaving the show, and they kill Carl, I just don’t see HOW IT’S POSSIBLE Rick would still spare Negan. I’m not even a Carl stan but Carl is really the point of this show, in my opinion. (Rick is the heart and soul but anyway) Carl is what this world is about, saving it for the kids. Carl is Rick’s everything. (Or he should be) I really don’t see how Carl could die, and Rick wouldn’t go fucking berserk. 

I’m just so confused at what they’re planning here. It’s chaos, and I’m hoping that’s the point, like the “how is the gang gonna get out of this jam” sort of thing. Because otherwise there’s a cleanup on Aisle 8 and I’m not picking it up. 

IM SO TIRED OF DARYL. That was unrelated but needed to be screamed. 

The below is what I wish would happen

If I was in charge of this thing, I would have laid out Negan and the war VERY carefully. Season 8 would end with Negan in the cell, we’d have the two year time jump, things would look grand and we’d have the Whisperers introduced subtly. 

Season 9 and 10 would be it. Season 9 would be fast paced, covering Negan’s redemption arc, the whisperers, and from there I’d probably change things because this show is gonna be wrapped up in a bow at the end of season 10.

After the whisperers, I’d probably have a lot of communication developed between the main crew and towns and maybe even states. We didn’t lead people on for 10 years for nothing. Season 10 would be about rebuilding, about characters creating lives. 

Season 10/Series Finale:

It’s like at least four years after the war. Negan lives on the outskirts of a town, Maggie is still leader of Hilltop, Carol and Ezekiel rule the Kingdom (yes, Ezekiel is still alive bitch! Shiva would have been too but whatever), and Rick and Michonne ‘rule’ Alexandria, but not really because Rick is done with that shit! But Michonne is still a queen so. 

Anyway Judith is like 6 or something, Carl is an adult living at Hilltop with Enid, she’s pregnant. Rick and Michonne are in bliss. Judith is going to school. 

And we see conflict, but it’s all ordinary life conflict, like broken horse and buggies, or bad crops, things bad enough to cause worry, but you know theyre gonna figure this shit out!

It ends with the main cast getting together in a way and talking, but not too hokey. Reminiscing. Over their voices we see clips of their life, Negan is chopping wood outside his house, alone, LITTLE HERSHEL IS RUNNING AROUND HILLTOP, all sorts of hopeful “Look where we got” things. But it’s not as cheesy as it sounds, somehow. 

Anyway here is my rough draft vision its dumb, I dont write for TV, but you get the gist

Series Finale Final Scenes: Title: New Life

Final Scene A. 

[Rick, Michonne, Carl, Maggie, Carol, and Daryl sit around a bonfire in Alexandria]

Maggie: I saw Negan today. Out in Concord ... it’s strange. I don’t feel that anger anymore. I don’t really feel anything. I guess I’ve moved on. -- It all seems so barbaric now. 

Michonne: It does. 

Maggie: And unfair. Sometimes I wonder why my daddy had to have that happen to him, when in only a few years, we’d be a little more civilized. 

Rick: It was the world then. No rhyme or reason for it. It just was. 

Maggie: But we fought, so that they [kids] didn’t have to deal with it like we did. 

Rick: It just took us a little longer than I would have liked. [Rick looks at Carl]

Carl: That’s not anything you could have helped. I’m proud to have helped make this world what it is now. It wasn’t your fault any of it happened. We all had to do what we felt was right. It didn’t work out for everybody. 

Maggie: No it didn’t. And he gets to live out the rest of his life in a peace he knows he doesn’t deserve. He can hold on to that pain. Not me. Not anymore. 

Rick: Glenn would be proud of you. 

Maggie: Yes, he would be. [soft smile]

Carol: Sometimes I think, Sophia should be here to see this. But the more I go back, the more I think about everything that’s happened...is it wrong that I’m glad she didn’t have to go through it?

Michonne: No. I feel the same way. 

Carol: It’s painful, isn’t it?

Michonne: Very. But we made it here so that no one else has to know our pain. Or Sophia’s, or Andre’s. 

Carl: And Andrea, Hershel, Dale...Tyreese, Abraham, Sasha. Glenn. No one else has to feel that. 

Maggie: Or Beth’s.

Rick: Or Shane’s. 

Daryl: The world didn’t make monsters out of us. 

Rick: No. But it tried. 

Carol: ...It did. At times. 

Rick: But we came back. Because we can always come back. We’re not too far gone. 

Maggie: And we never will be.

Final Scene B

Scene transition, Rick and Michonne walk home. 

Michonne: Do you ever feel like you could have done more? Looking back?

Rick: All the time. 

Michonne: Well, we could’ve done worse. [smirk]

Rick: We did alright, all things considered. [returned smirk]

[flirting ensues]

Michonne: You made one good decision, at the very least. 

Rick: What’s that?

Michonne: Us. 

Rick: Oh, I didn’t decide that. That just happened. 

Michonne: Mmhmm. 

Rick smiles. 

Michonne smiles, closes her eyes and looks away. 

Rick: What?

Michonne: I’ll just never get tired of that. 

Rick: What?

Michonne: Your elusive smile. 

Rick: Well, the feeling goes both ways. You’re the only reason I’m here. 

Michonne: Not the only reason. 

Rick: No, you are. I would have given up without you. 

Michonne: Well, in that case, I’m really glad you let me into the prison. 

Rick: Feels like a lifetime ago, doesn’t it? 

Michonne: Yeah. We’re in a new life now. -- I’m going to walk Carl to the gate, I have to give him that basket. 

Rick: Right, I’ll see you inside then. 

Final Scene C

Scene transition. Rick is in their bedroom, he gets ready for bed, and lies in the bed, waiting for Michonne to come back. 

The camera is at a birds eye view, on Rick’s face. His eyes go back and forth like he’s thinking and envisioning things, remembering. It zooms out, slowly. Rick smiles. Camera stops as it gets past the ceiling. The scene is reminiscent of the first episode. Rick is awake now, but in a better world. Zooming out, but he’s not trapped.

A voice, right before fading to black. 

Hey you. Dumbass. Yeah, you in the tank. Cozy in there?

End Series.

#yes i disappeared for two hours writing this

[alabastertouch]

Masterlist

Hello! In this post, everything that I have written so far will be compiled. It will be updated from time to time.

✦ Mark Tuan 

One Hundred Ways 

⚾︎ In which Mark is unaware of how to show his love.

Are They? Are They Not? (ft. Jackson and cameo by the other members)

⚾︎ Jackson wonders why Mark is suddenly affectionate towards Y/N, and to further find out, he escalates a plan.

Where Are We?

⚾︎ Mark’s not sure where things between the two of you lie… But maybe between the zone of being friends and being lovers.

Broken Discs and Hidden Cams

⚾︎ You test your boyfriend’s patience and love for you through a broken disc and a hidden camera.

Baby Steps

⚾︎ Mark always keeps his promises, and you shouldn’t have to worry.

✦ Im Jaebum (JB)

Can I Purr-ease Have Your Number?

⚾︎ When Jaebum began looking for his missing cat, he didn’t expect to find something more.

Not a Joking Matter

⚾︎ Jaebum is usually carefree with your jokes, but when you take it too far, a cold war impends between you two.

Searching For The Truth - The Prologue | Part I | Part II | Part III

⚾︎ You are assigned for the investigation of the sudden disappearance of Kim Jisoo, and someone wants to tag along as you look for her whereabouts.

✦ Jackson Wang

Candy

⚾︎ The boys try to win your heart, but of course your boyfriend Jackson will never ever let that happen. Not even in a variety show.

✦ Park Jinyoung

Withered Red Rose

⚾︎ She fell in love with him at eight, and her innocent heart began to grew molds because of his dreary coldness.

The Boyfriend and the Bestfriend (ft. Kim Hanbin of iKON)

⚾︎ Your friendship with your guy best friend goes awry when you introduce your new boyfriend to him.

✦ Kim Yugyeom

Trash Talks

⚾︎ There had always been an unspoken rivalry between you and your apartment neighbor Kim Yugyeom. When he decided to finally move out, you thought your life will finally be at peace. But would it really?

✦ All members

Reaction: Seeing you with other men (when you’re in a “some” relationship)

✦ Byun Baekhyun

Behind the Closet

✻ It’s Jongin and Sehun’s fault, all Jongin and Sehun’s. But somehow, you’re thankful for having to participate in their stupid games and pointless dares that indeed proved something.

✦ Park Chanyeol

Learning How To Let Go

✻ Maybe it was meant to be, maybe it was not. But you know that what you and Chanyeol had has reached its ending.

Idle (with Oh Sehun)

✻ Okay, so you are hopelessly in love with your best friend… Guess it’s not a bad thing that there’s an enormously handsome guy quietly waiting?

It’s Not Me (Mini Masterlist)

✻ After a songwriter broke your heart, you swore you would never do anything that involves music. But when a desperate composer asks for your kind help, will you change your mind?

✦ Kim Jongin (Kai)

My Home

✻ You’ve been independent for long, and your parents are proud of you for that. What they’re not aware of is that you’ve been keeping something from them.

Facing The Beast

✻ As you see your old friends, Jongin stays by your side and helps you face your fears.

✦ Oh Sehun

Idle (with Park Chanyeol)

✻ Okay, so you are hopelessly in love with your best friend… Guess it’s not a bad thing that there’s an enormously handsome guy quietly waiting?

✦ Jung Jaehyun

From Paris, With Love

☁︎ The City of Love guarantees a long lasting bliss for the two of them, even if they’ve gone back to Seoul.

Catching the Right Time

☁︎ Love chooses the right time, and by right time, meaning you are ready to face the bittersweet reality.

Documented Feelings - Part I | Part II | Epilogue

☁︎ Your class requires a documentation of you being in a relationship with someone until death do you part. It didn’t require you to fall in love, though.

✦ All members

Reaction: Hearing you speak Spanish for the first time

Reaction: Knows your shy, then sees you dancing at a party

Reaction: Living with a fan for three months

✦ Kim Jiwon (Bobby)

Better Than Pooh

☼ Bobby begins acting weird around you, and you’re steadfast to know the reason behind it.

Perfect In My Arms

☼ You never cared about your height, but when people sneered about it with Bobby involved, you do not know what to say.

My Prince in Ripped Jeans

☼ Like black and white, your exterior and Bobby’s look a lot opposing, but your heart says otherwise.

✦ Kim Hanbin (B.I.)

The Boyfriend and the Bestfriend (ft. Park Jinyoung of GOT7)

☼ Your friendship with your guy best friend goes awry when you introduce your new boyfriend to him.

Spitting Fire

☼ When you showed Hanbin everything you got, he loathed you… Not only are you the best, but because he’s undeniably attracted to you.

✦ Koo Junhoe (Ju-ne)

Cheetos and Chill

☼ Junhoe is rarely a charmer, but you see how he really is one fine day.

Just For A Little While?

☼ You don’t want Junhoe to leave, and he does not want to go either.

Extraordinarily Normal

☼ Junhoe wonders why after all this time, you’re still loving him unconditionally.

Stay

☼ “Before the dark night traps me in, don’t leave me. Do you still love me? If you feel the same, don’t leave today. Don’t ask why it has to be you… just stay with me.” Blackpink - Stay

✦ Park Jaehyung (Jae)

Trust

☂ Jaehyung hates to feel like he’s controlling you, and you realize you’ve been taking advantage of this fear of his

✦ Kang Younghyun (YoungK)

When You Love Someone

☂ Younghyun is unaware of how he makes people feel, and you are unaware of how you make Younghyun feel.

✦ Choi Seunghyun (T.O.P.)

The Gap Between Us

♕ Your young age never bothered Seunghyun, but word travels fast and he’s become a victim of it.

#masterlist #got7 scenarios #nct scenarios #ikon scenarios #exo scenarios #big bang scenarios #day6 scenarios #to be updated

[ellynefics]

Here With You

genre;; Realistic, Idol Minhyuk x Civilian reader

pairing;; Minhyuk x Male!Reader -- Mentions of Showhyuk

warnings;; fluff, angst

words;; 2175 (2k)

this work is experimental !! I decided to write something within the span of 12 hours, and this is what came out. It hasn’t gone through the million or so revisions that I usually put my work through (lol), so please forgive any mistakes! Inspired in part by Here With You by Lost Frequencies and Netsky

"Hello, Lee Minhyuk? Um--my name is Ahn Seungyoun; (Y/FL/N) and I are housemates and I got your number from his phone. I’m so sorry to bother you, I know you’re an idol, and might not even be in Korea right now. But I’m scared for him. I don’t think he’s moved from his spot in bed for the whole weekend, except to do absolutely necessary things--go to the bathroom, mostly...he whimpers and cries in the night, and I’ve tried to get him to eat, to drink, and he won’t. Please, I don’t know what else to do. He won’t talk to me. You’re so important to him, maybe he’ll listen to you. Call me back at--”

Minhyuk’s heart dropped deep into the pit of his stomach, and he brushed back the purple-blue hair on his brow. He hadn’t known what to expect as he had stepped out in the hall to listen to his voicemail, but this was definitely a shock.

It was a fine summer day at Starship HQ. As usual, Lee Minhyuk was lounging in a chair in the studio, watching Jooheon and Changkyun record something and drawing a little cartoon on a piece of paper. He was taken by surprise when phone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled it out to an unfamiliar--but local--phonecall. Not thinking much of it, he let it ring through, and a minute later, the cell buzzed again, letting him know that someone had left a message.

“Jooheonie, Changkyunie,” Minhyuk poked his head back in and quietly called to his friends. “I’m sorry to bolt like this, but there’s something I need to take care of.”

Minutes later, Minhyuk was calling your housemate to let him know that he was on his way, and hopping onto the nine o’clock bus at the same time, mask pulled full width over his face. No one paid much attention to him, which he appreciated because it gave him a moment to think.

Minhyuk didn’t keep in touch with many of his old friends from before he became an idol, but you were an exception. The two of you had been best buds in High School and through his turbulent audition days. When Seungyoun had said that Minhyuk was so important to you, he wasn’t wrong. Likewise, you had meant the entire world to Minhyuk--for a while. The tall, beautiful boy remembered everything: long, loving gazes; passionate kisses. Warmth and close heartbeats under the sheets; the feel of your rough fingers laced in his own. How handsome and beautiful you looked when you were locked in hot embrace; the contentment that pooled and settled in his heart when he woke up at your side.

But then Minhyuk had started training, and you were accepted into Seoul National University’s Engineering program. These were dreams come true for both of you, but paths that differed greatly from one another. Together, you decided that once he moved out and into the dorms with the other trainees, that would be the end of your love life, and it would be back to good friends. Now, the only contact you kept was the occasional text and/or phone call. You lived your life, and he lived his. Still, he cared enough that he’d drop everything in your moment of need. 

Seungyoun’s news troubled Minhyuk deeply. He had seen you at your lowest points before, but never had anything been this bad. It almost felt like his heart was being torn from his chest. Guilt, shame, and sadness washed over him as he chastised himself for not seeing this coming earlier. You had been going through a rough patch lately. The last time you had called, you sounded weak and less confident than usual. Minhyuk heard straight from your lips that your passion for engineering, the one that had carried you through your younger years, was gone. After spending a few months floundering to find something to replace it, you had dropped out of school, expanding to full time hours at a menial job. This was temporary, so you claimed, as you decided what the fuck you were going to do now.

Half an hour later, Minhyuk was knocking quietly on the door of your apartment, and a skinny boy with dark circles under his eyes opened it. He stood up straighter and bowed, almost in disbelief, as he registered who it was. “Hello, Minhyuk, come in. I’m Seungyoun, it’s good to meet you.”

“You as well,” the idol replied distractedly. “Where is he...?”

“Still in bed. Down the hall, to the left.”

Of course Minhyuk knew where your room was, but that wasn’t important right now. The taller boy just nodded and kicked off his shoes at the doormat before making a beeline for there.

The room was dark when he turned the knob and let himself in. The stuffy, hopeless air hit him like a tidal wave. Just barely, he could see you huddled under your gray comforter, a rock-like lump except for your gentle breaths. They were too rapid for you to be asleep; you must be brewing in your own disappointment and discontent. Minhyuk’s already-broken heart shattered further.

“(Y/N)?” He said, lowly, and came over to seat himself on the edge of your mattress, grabbing your shoulder and shaking it a little. “It’s Minhyuk. What’s wrong? Your housemate told me that you’ve been like this all weekend.”

No reply, not even a muscle twitch. Minhyuk’s brow furrowed, mouth pressing into a line and his lip corners twitching down. He reached over to tap the base of the little gray lamp on your nightstand. Soft light illuminated the room. 

“(Y/N)?” He queried, again. 

Nothing.

“Please, You should get up and get some food to eat. It’ll make you feel so much better. Go outside, breathe the fresh air.”

Silence.

“Even I remember to eat. (Y/N)--remember when I announced that I was going to become a trainee at Starship? You smiled and said that you’d be happy as long as I didn’t starve myself. I think about that every day.”

He finally got a deep sigh out of you, but nothing else.

“You shouldn’t starve yourself, either. Come on.” Attaching himself to your arm, he hauled up and managed to pull you onto your back. Suddenly, however, you retaliated, jerking yourself out of his grasp and pushing him away, making him fall off the bed and onto the floor with an umph. Minhyuk felt a flash of anger rip through him, and his cheeks heated up. “Fine, if that’s how you want it to be. I care about you, (Y/N), I was just trying to help but I guess I’ll leave now.”

“Good.”

Your small, weak voice cracked, and immediately the other boy regretted his frustrated words. In the low light, he saw that fresh drops were retracing the old tear streaks on your cheeks. Minhyuk gave a sigh. “Ugh--I’m sorry. Just--please tell me what the matter is. I might be an idol now, but I’m still Lee Minhyuk, your friend, confidante, and former lover. I don’t like seeing you like this.”

You couldn’t do anything but sob for a few minutes. Minhyuk got back up on the mattress and laid down next to you. Almost instantly, you were pressed into his chest, hands clutching at his shirt. 

“I’m such a failure,” You managed to gasp at last. “I left my job, applied for another I actually was excited about--after feeling like shit for months and months--but I didn’t get it, and I hate myself. I have an incomplete degree and crushing college debt. I don’t hang out with anyone anymore, except--Seungyoun, and I push even him away when I’m drunk and angry. I just want to die here.”

“Shh, shh.” Minhyuk ran a hand through your hair, and your breathing gradually slowed. “You’re not a failure. You have your whole life ahead of you. You can pick yourself back up and find happiness, I believe in you.”

“Wh--why are you still my friend, Minhyuk?”

“Because you’re my friend, too. We’ve known each other for so long, and when we talk, we still understand each other, though we can’t see each other often. I still have love in my heart for you.”

There was a long silence.

“Sometimes I wish that you’d hold me like you used to, my sexy boy.” The quiet whisper flowed from your lips before you could stop it.

Minhyuk smiled gently, and leaned forward to give you a peck on the forehead. “You know I can’t, baby.”

You sighed. Wet filled your eyes, and Minhyuk’s chest tightened as he imagined how maybe you were remembering the disappointment you felt when during your last phone call, he told you that he had fallen in love again. “Yeah. Hyunwoo, right?” 

“Yes.” Minhyuk and Hyunwoo had started dating about two months ago, and it was bliss. Minhyuk hadn’t felt anything so strong for anyone since--well, you.

“I’m happy for you, really. He seems like such a caring person, and definitely a much better boyfriend than I ever was.”

“Yah, don’t you dare say that,” Minhyuk’s eyes widened and he scolded you harshly, more so than he really wanted. “You were the perfect boyfriend. I’m frankly jealous of the person that I know is out there, waiting for you.”

“I don’t think there’s anyone, Minhyuk-ah, but--thank you. You always say the right things.”

“There is, there is. Don’t doubt me. You know I’m always right.” Minhyuk started to cry as well, as he squeezed you tight to him. “I’m sorry, I regret not--not talking to you more. I just don’t think about it enough. I’m always so tired from everything we do--I’m living my dream but I shouldn’t forget the past and how you helped bring me to this point.”

“It’s ok, Minhyuk.” Your hand stroke his side, soothing his sudden weariness. “I haven’t been calling you, either. I’ll try to do it more, too.”

Silence reigned again for a little while, but now it was understanding, peaceful silence. Minhyuk took that moment to clear his mind of his worries, unload himself of the things that had been cluttering his thoughts. 

Finally he asked, “(Y/N), you mentioned...a job you were excited about? What was it, maybe there are other places that are hiring similar positions.”

You chuckled, an unexpected sound against his breast. “You’ll laugh at me, Minhyuk-ah.”

“Try me.”

“It was--a kid’s sports camp.”

Minhyuk’s jaw went slack. “Why would I laugh at you for that? I’ll tell you a secret, I’ve always wanted kids.”

“That’s not a secret. You’ve said it in interviews, and what was that thing you did--Monsta X-Ray?”

A sunshine smile spread across Minhyuk’s face. “I didn’t know you followed me that closely, (Y/N)-(y)ah.”

“I do.” Your face went a little red. “My family and friends all think I’m crazy, but I still support you.”

“Ahh--You have no idea how much that means to me.” Minhyuk could barely continue through his tears. “And it is a secret. No one knows that I’ve always wanted to--even since the time I was with you.”

You smiled. Minhyuk wondered if you were thinking about all those times when the two of you would see a cute baby or toddler, and Minhyuk’s face would light up.

“Anyways, come on, let’s get you some food. Your stomach is growling like an angry tiger. Also, I think you’ve got a very worried housemate to apologize to and make up to.”

“Right.”

The two of you untangled yourselves, and you shakily got up, following Minhyuk out to the kitchen. Seungyoun was there waiting, finishing a bowl of ramyun. His eyes widened when he saw you, and how terrible you looked, tear stains running down your face, hair dishevelled, face pale like a ghost. Yet, he brightened too. “Oh my God, (Y/N)! I was so scared, I thought I’d have to call a hotline and the emergency room and everything--let me make you something to eat--nice and gentle on the stomach. And water! You need a glass of water!”

He dashed around, preparing things. You sat in a chair, and while Seungyoun’s back was turned, Minhyuk took your hand one last time. “Promise me you’ll take care of yourself. Next time I call, I also want to hear that you’ve been looking for a counselor or psychiatrist or something. That’s the most important thing. For me, ok?”

You nodded, smiled, and gave his slender hand a squeeze. “For you, Minhyukie.”

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