#juju bakery

[seakicker]

☆ My Next-Door Neighbor is an Annoying Older Woman Who Constantly Bothers Me

☆ between: college au!scaramouche x milf!reader

☆ synopsis: scaramouche insists he doesn’t want to fuck the milf living next door, but all his friends think he doth protest too much.

☆ word count: 10.5K words

☆ a/n: like with my venti x milf!reader fic over on ao3, this is supposed to give a sort of doujinshi vibe, hence the embarrassing title and the lunacy of some ideas like milf!reader going outside in a super sheer shirt. hopefully you feel the doujinshi vibe i was going for as i have a lot of fun trying to replicate the style, themes, and flow of doujinshis using only text!

☆ contents: fem + plus-sized reader (reader is explicitly described as chubby, busty, and taller than scaramouche), age gap obviously; scaramouche is a senior in college and reader is in her early 40s, degradation, a couple insults (such as scaramouche calling you a hag/loose/etc.), degradation, exhibitionism (scaramouche fucks you in front of a glass sliding door), sexual frustration, and unprotected sex + scaramouche pulls out

also posted to ao3 with the same title and under the same username!

Scaramouche has a problem.

Well, a problem slightly more irritating than the approximately nine hundred other problems he deals with on a daily basis. These issues include, but are not limited to, the consistent problems he has with the hot water heater in his apartment, his obnoxious group project teammate Ajax who insisted upon being the group’s leader despite his complete and utter lack of intellect, his annoying circle of friends that always seem to find ways to poke their noses into Scaramouche’s business, his frustratingly-dull history professor that always goes off on tangents completely unrelated to the class’ subject matter… and so on and so forth. It’s one issue after another; there’s always something when it comes to Scaramouche.

A matter more pressing than all of those other nine hundred issues put together, however, comes in the form of his next-door neighbor— you.

You’re a divorced woman in your early forties who lives by herself, works during the daytime while Scaramouche is on campus, and always seems to leave and return home at the same times he does. He moved in next door to you a few months ago at the start of his junior year, but you’ve never really gotten the chance to get to know him beyond the curt responses he gives you when you ask how he’s doing or what he did over the weekend. His coldness towards you doesn’t make too much sense— have you somehow offended him without knowing? You like to consider yourself a good neighbor: you don’t party (like a woman your age would ever do such a thing), you don’t blast loud music long into the night (or at all), you take good care of your things and avoid causing trouble for Scaramouche or your other neighbors, and you’re very, very tidy. When you’re in the mood to brag a little, you’ll say that you have the nicest balcony in the entire apartment complex.

…Avoid causing trouble for Scaramouche, huh? He’d beg to differ.

If Scaramouche has nine hundred problems in his life, then maybe it’d be more accurate to claim that you’re the cause of at least seven hundred of those problems rather than claiming that you’re one single, self-contained issue separate from all of those other problems. Maybe it’s the way you insist upon butting your way into his life and, in what must be your way of expressing it, “taking care” of him that irritates him more than anything else. Really, if he had to sum up your advances in one word, he’d have to go with aggravating.

At first, he bitterly wondered if you’re just some senile old hag using him as a replacement for your son, who’s surely moved out by now given your age. All you are is a woman looking to cure her empty nest syndrome by doting on someone her son’s age according to Scaramouche— he viewed your kindness as underhanded and delusional because he can take care of himself, you know. He’s an adult man living on his own; he knows how to navigate the trials and tribulations of young adulthood without some old lady insisting upon knocking on his door and gifting him home-cooked meals, bringing up his mail from the first-floor mailroom, or helping him with chores where you can. It’s not like Scaramouche would ever let you into his apartment, but that hasn’t stopped you from finding ways to help outside by sweeping outside his front door or washing the outside of his front window while he’s not home.

Okay, maybe it’s a little creepy to wash your neighbor’s windows without him asking you to help out, but it’s not like he’s going to do it. You would know— you had once waited a week to see if he’d clean up a spilled drink stain on the walkway in front of his door. As you expected, he never got around to it, so you happily cleaned it up on his behalf. Cleaning up for him doesn’t really put you out of your way either— whenever you sweep his doorway, it’s because you were already outside tidying up in front of your place; why not help out your neighbor in the process?

When you bring him meals you prepared yourself, it’s out of the goodness of your heart and because you can’t help but worry about a college boy’s diet— fast food, pizza, frozen microwave meals, and instant ramen don’t have all the nutrients a hardworking man needs. When you bring him his mail, it’s because he has a tendency to forget about it until his mailbox is, quite literally, overflowing. Whereas you check your mailbox every single day, Scaramouche seems to forget about his until the end of the week, which is certainly no way to live— what if he misses an important bill or notice? As a result, you took it upon yourself to check his mailbox for him whenever you go to retrieve your own mail.

Again, maybe it’s a little creepy to gather your neighbor’s mail, but it’s not like you’re hurting anyone, right? You certainly don’t root through his mail or open any of it. Even though Scaramouche rolls his eyes and mumbles a halfhearted little “thanks” every time you hand him his mail, he doesn’t really seem to mind. Despite his initial reluctance to accept any of it, he still eats the food you prepare for him if the empty containers he returns to you a few days later are any indication of that fact. You figure maybe he’s just a little shy or tired from his long day on campus— it does your heart well to know that he’s working so very hard.

On the flip side of things, Scaramouche considers your… activities a total inconvenience. He’ll admit that your meals taste very good— though he’d never say it to your face— but he doesn’t like feeling indebted to you or thinking that he owes you something even though you’ve told him multiple times that your favors don’t need any payback. You’re just happy to cook for someone other than yourself, you had told him once, confirming Scaramouche’s suspicion that you live alone. It’s not his fault you’re bored enough to make food for someone you barely know, so do you have to rope him into your wiles? He already has groceries and though he doesn’t really know how to cook, what’s wrong with having a bowl of cereal for dinner? It’s none of your business, is it?

Between your constant insistence on involving yourself in his life and the fact that he’s never seen anyone else leaving or entering your apartment, Scaramouche was able to correctly guess that you live alone… a realization that can’t help but annoy him. He figures that if you had someone, anyone else in your life like a spouse or another child living with you, you’d stop pestering him and stick to involving yourself in the lives of your family instead of your neighbor.

Would a pet do? Should he find some stray kitten and leave it on your doorstep? Is that what it’d take to make you mind your own business?

“Hey, Kuni, tell me about your little neighbor lady again,” Venti coos, accidentally knocking over his—thankfully— empty beer bottle when he leans forward to grab his phone. He’s drunk, but that barely makes a difference; he’d still make this request sober.

Glowering around the mouth of his own bottle, Scaramouche rolls his eyes in Venti’s general direction. “Why? If you want to know that hag so badly, go talk to her yourself.”

Venti busts out laughing, an action that his drunken body clearly can’t handle seeing as he falls sideways into Aether’s shoulder, making the latter grimace in response. Venti’s already a handful sober, but when he drinks… it takes the entire friend group to get him home and/or in bed safely. “Don’t threaten me with that, ‘cuz I really will do it— I’ll go steal your hot older girlfriend.”

Glaring up at him from his spot on the rug, Scaramouche has half a mind to shove that empty beer bottle into Venti’s eye for suggesting such a thing. Hey, wait a minute— why is Scaramouche the one sitting on the floor when this is his damn apartment?

“She’s not my fucking girlfriend,” he barks, turning to direct his glare at Kazuha too when he hears him chuckle.

“The more you deny it, the less convincing you are— you talk about her all the time, so I’m inclined to believe you really are dating,” Venti chirps, reaching for a bottle of beer that is most certainly not his.

“That’s mine,” Aether protests, watching as Venti takes a sip from his bottle anyways.

“Oops, my bad.” He doesn’t sound sincere.

“Well… get me another whenever you stand up.”

Venti waves his hand dismissively before redirecting his attention back to the more important matter at hand— Scaramouche’s complete and utter inability to just admit that he has the hots for his hot MILF of a neighbor and that any protest otherwise is a feeble attempt at hiding the truth.

“They say you’re attracted to things that make you mad,” Venti says. “…Cuteness aggression. Yeah. I saw a video about it once.”

“That’s not what cuteness aggression is, and ‘they’ say that you attract the things you fear,” Kazuha corrects him from his spot in the nearby armchair— again, why is Scaramouche the one sitting on the floor?— before he goes to take another hit off his blunt.

Venti repeats what Kazuha said in a nasally voice in an attempt to mock him, but the gesture only makes Kazuha chuckle again. It’ll be hard to draw any response more eloquent than a single laugh or a sigh out of him for the rest of the night— it’s a very, very stark difference from how he usually is.

“Why the fuck do I ever invite any of you over here?” Scaramouche sighs, taking a long swig from his own bottle. He doesn’t even really like the taste; it’s something Venti found on sale and decided to bring over, but Scaramouche has decided it’s better than spending his Friday night sober. Besides, it’ll take at least four more of these to deal with the impending conversation that he’s been trying so hard to pivot away from since Venti first brought it up.

“Because we’re best friends forever, next question. Why do you deny how much you wanna fuck your sexy neighbor, Kuni?” Venti asks again, pouting when Aether snatches the bottle Venti stole from him. “It’s super obvious. Xiao and Heizou agree with me, and I’m not just saying that because they’re not here tonight and can’t contest me on it. It’s true.”

Kazuha nods, and Aether simply shrugs. Christ alive, do they all think the same thing?

“And why on Earth do I— in theory— want to fuck her? She’s probably loose or something,” Scaramouche argues.

Venti busts out laughing again.

“It’s the opposite, really,” he starts, glancing between Aether and Kazuha when neither of them laugh along with him. “What, have you guys seriously never been with an older lady? They’re the best; the reason I know Kuni wants to get with that lady next door is because I got with the lady next door to me a couple months ago. It takes one to know one, or something. Trust me, Kuni, I know what you’re going through and we are seriously gonna get through this together.” Why is he making it sound like a relative died or something?

“They’re experienced,” Venti sighs longingly, blindly reaching out again for the bottle Aether’s holding, who moves it further away and out of Venti’s reach. “They feel really, really good. They actually know what they’re doing… sometimes the girls—and guys, mind you, I’ve gotten with plenty of both— our age clearly don’t know they’re supposed to be doing, but getting with somebody’s mom…”

“You’re gross!” Aether gasps, though his pink cheeks tell a different story.

“Not as gross as the guy who’s told us the same story about seeing his neighbor lady braless like four times now,” Venti replies, glancing over at Scaramouche with a grin. “Really left an impression on you, huh, Kuni?”

Just like that, Scaramouche finds himself instantly reminded of, well, the time he saw you braless first thing in the morning. A few months ago on some random Saturday morning, Scaramouche was out smoking a cigarette on his porch when you stepped outside to water the plants you keep on your balcony. There were so many of them: a small tomato plant, a pot overflowing with basil that you took to trimming after you finished watering everything, a couple of hanging baskets field with flowers, and a few other vegetable plants and potted succulents. More glaringly obvious than the abundance of plants occupying your balcony was your complete and utter shamelessness— even a quick glance in your direction was enough to draw Scaramouche’s attention to the distractingly sheer fabric of your white camisole.

It’s not like Scaramouche was actively staring at your tits— really, he wasn’t, he swears— because anyone would notice something that egregious. The low, low sweep of your camisole around your ample bust, your nipples beading up against the thin fabric, the constant fucking movement of the top as you shifted and bent over to water the plants sitting on the ground, moved, and walked, all of it. He complained to his friends about your complete and utter shamelessness— What kind of woman steps outside practically naked? he spat, much to the amusement of Venti, who had said that wearing a thin shirt does not, in fact, make one naked.

Worst of all, you had actually fucking caught Scaramouche staring, an action that made you grin wickedly and run your hands down the sides of your soft, plump body as if to try and draw his eyes down along with your hands. Instead, Scaramouche had only whipped his head to the other side, busying himself with tapping the ash off his cigarette as if it were the most important task he’d ever complete in his life. Jesus Christ, he was only staring because he couldn’t believe you’d be so shameless as to wear something like that outside, not because he was genuinely aroused by how low your camisole sat on your chest, how big your tits are, how soft they look…

He thinks he shuddered then, and he insisted to his friends that it was because of a sudden chilly breeze and absolutely nothing more. It was either that or because he was just so shocked by your display that a shiver went down his spine— he can’t even remember the exact reason he gave anymore.

Either way, none of them really believed him.

“Ah, he seems distracted,” Kazuha notes simply, raising a hand to point at Scaramouche before grinning. His words pull Scaramouche from his little daydream, and he groans at the realization that, yes, he spaced out remembering yet another instance of your abhorrent shamelessness and perversion.

“Spaced out thinking about cute MILF boobs, I get it,” Venti affirms, nodding. “Nobody gets that more than me. Not only that, but you’ve also, uh, ‘complained’ to us about seeing her in her swimsuit. Really, Kuni, it’s like you’re biding your time and waiting for her to take her clothes off so you can tell us about it.”

…That’s a story for another time. Scaramouche has had enough of thinking about you for one day; it’s bad enough that you brought him his mail today just mere moments before Venti, Kazuha, and Aether arrived to hang out— what if they saw you?— but to be reminded of the image of your tits underneath that pathetic excuse for a top…

He shakes his head and takes a long, long sip from his bottle.

“And they’re so soft, Kuni,” Venti says, slumping over further into Aether for support. “They feel like absolutely nothing else. I feel like firmness or perkiness or whatever is really, really overrated— the softness of a cute MILF’s boobs is unrivaled!”

“Can you not say things like that right into my ear?” Aether mumbles bashfully, making Venti laugh.

“Why? Am I gonna put the mental image of MILF boobs in your brain, too? Are we gonna become an entire friend group full of MILF chasers? That’d be hilarous. I already know about Xiao’s little crush on his English professor.”

Jesus, Scaramouche has got to steer this conversation somewhere else or he’ll go mad. “Anyways,” he beings, “Where is that pizza you ordered ages ago?”

“I thought Kazuha was taking care of it,” Aether remarks, glancing over at him. Kazuha goes to reply, but nothing comes out— yep, he’s gone for the night. He won’t be able to get out any more than four words max until morning.

As if the universe heard their request, the doorbell rings to signify the arrival of dinner. Before Scaramouche can go to pull himself up off the floor—he really should make Venti move; it’s his couch in his apartment— Venti’s already in the process of skipping towards the door. Aether takes the opportunity to kick his feet up over the other couch cushion, making Scaramouche wonder if the three of them formed some secret pact to ensure that he stays on the floor the entire evening.

However, what stands on the other side of the door is not, in fact, the pizza delivery boy. It’s you, aluminum foil-covered glass casserole dish in hand, leading Scaramouche to believe that while the universe did hear their request for food, the devil answered by sending you to his doorstep while he has three of his friends over.

“Oh! You’re not the pizza guy,” Venti beams, putting on his best ‘polite’ voice possible. Scaramouche groans and looks over towards his other two friends just so he doesn’t accidentally make eye contact with you, but neither Aether nor Kazuha look back at him. They’re looking at you.

Christ, he’ll never live this down. Not only do they know who you are, they now know what you look like.

“I’m not,” you giggle. “I live next door; I bring food to Scaramouche sometimes whenever I get a little too excited in the kitchen and make too much. I can’t eat the leftovers fast enough before they go bad, and I would hate to waste food, you know?”

“You can call him Kuni,” Venti offers. “We all do. It’s less of a mouthful, don’t you think?”

Scaramouche decides that Venti will be leaving his apartment in a body bag tonight.

His cheeks burn with equal parts humiliation and anger, and the realization that his friends’ teasing is only about to get worse now that they know who you are and what you look like more than motivates Scaramouche to devise a plot to kill the three of them.

After introducing yourself to Venti, he smiles and replies that “the pleasure is all his” when you tell him it’s nice to meet some of Scaramouche’s friends. Venti has half a mind to invite you inside for a moment, but he decides that’d be unnecessary— he figures he’s already done more than enough to inspire Scaramouche into action. If Scaramouche won’t act on his feelings himself, then maybe a little shove from his friends will help him along.

“That’s sweet of you!” Venti praises, taking the dish from your hands. “I’m glad Kuni’s eating properly these days. One time, he told us that the only thing he survived off of during finals week was a sleeve of Saltines and some peanut butter. You’re so kind, miss.”

You giggle sheepishly, a sound that Scaramouche would like to claim grates his ears. Miss? Can’t Venti see that you’re, well, old? “Well, I’m glad that he has such kind friends to support him. You all take care, okay? You too, Scara— Kuni!” You call out past Venti’s shoulder, making both Aether and Kazuha chuckle.

After bidding farewell to the four in what has to be the most mortifying moment of Scaramouche’s entire life, you leave, allowing Venti to close the door behind you and make his way back to the others. “Those boobs are huge,” he sighs dreamily, looking up at the ceiling. “If I got suffocated between those, I would die a fully satisfied man.”

“Then go die,” Scaramouche mutters in agreement, cheeks still burning with humiliation. Why does the universe insist upon tormenting him so?

Eyeing the dish in Venti’s hands, Aether pipes up too “She cooks for you? Kuni, you have it so good.”

Scaramouche is amazed that, after all this time, his friends still find it in them to be jealous of him despite all of his attempts at framing you as annoying, invasive, and overbearing. Can’t they see that you’re doing this on purpose?! Scaramouche has half a mind to wonder if you’re psychic— what other explanation is there for your obnoxiously perfect timing? He asks about food and suddenly you appear on his doorstep, dish in hand as if you had heard him through the walls. There’s no way they’re that thin, are they?

Venti moves to set the dish down on the kitchen countertop before turning around to look Scaramouche square in the eye. “Kuni, I’m saying this because I respect you as my longtime friend,” he asserts, tone and gaze both deathly serious in a way that’s genuinely almost out of character for someone as flippant and carefree as Venti. “But you better fuck that lady the first chance you get because, if you don’t, I’m taking her for myself.” That should do it.

Scowling in response, Scaramouche crosses his arms over his chest and sighs bitterly. “Why would I stop you? I don’t care what you do with her. For the last fucking time, I’m not into her.” Despite his words, Scaramouche can’t deny that there’s something… unsettling about the idea of Venti getting with you. Does he really want to watch his friend take four A.M. booty calls in order to fuck the woman living right next door to him? Can Scaramouche truly stomach the idea of his friend fucking the brains out of someone just a few walls away from where he lives? It’s hard to put his finger on why, but something about Venti getting with Scaramouche’s neighbor, despite his insistence that there truly is nothing between the two of them, really, really irks him.

Well, it’s probably just because a lot of Venti’s behavior tends to irritate Scaramouche in the first place, right? Yeah, it’s probably just that. He doesn’t need to hear every last gritty detail of his friend’s sexual trysts.

That characteristically smug grin of his finds its way back to Venti’s face as he reaches over Aether’s shoulder and snatches his beer bottle again. “Fine, I guess I’ll have to take your word for it. How about we forget the pizza and eat what she brought over?”

“Oh, I see now,” Kazuha interjects after having been silent for the past twenty minutes. He turns his phone around to show Scaramouche, Venti, and Aether the check-out screen on the pizza chain’s website. “It seems I failed actually submit the order; it was still waiting for me to pay.”

Scaramouche doesn’t have a hangover the next morning, a blessing he owes to the fact that he only ended up drinking two beers last night. He probably would’ve consumed more if he had the chance to, but Venti blew through the rest of the box quicker than the other three could try to stop him. It took both Kazuha and Aether supporting Venti’s hardly-conscious body to get him down the stairs to the parking lot so they can drive him home— there’s no way Venti would be able to safely get himself home amidst such an awful hangover.

As he pokes through his apartment scooping up empty beer bottles and stained paper plates to toss into a trash bag, the glass casserole dish sitting out on the kitchen counter catches Scaramouche’s eye. Save for a few scraps shoved into the rounded corners of the pan, it’s practically been picked clean— the four boys tore through it easily with Venti, Kazuha, and Aether all fawning over just how good a home-cooked meal tastes after months of campus cafeteria food, fast food, and instant ramen. Venti mentioned that there’s just something about a MILF’s cooking that makes it so much better, leading to a conversation about how, in Venti’s educated opinion, older women just do everything better: sex, cooking, cleaning, caretaking, all of it.

Scaramouche scoffs at the memory. “She’s nothing special,” he mutters to himself, still failing to understand Venti’s obsession with somebody he’s never even met until last night. Scaramouche is the one who’s actually been living next door to her for months now— as his friends know by now, he has plenty more to say about her than Venti does.

Shouldn’t he be the one to comment on things like the size of your bust, the softness of your legs, the plumpness of your ass and belly, and the flavor of your cooking? He’s the one who’s actually seen you lounging in tiny string bikinis by the apartment complex’s pool, watering the plants out on your balcony in a pair of shorts that certainly break publicly decency laws, and retrieving your mail in a shirt so thin he can make out the little bumps of your nipples up against the fabric.

“Christ, what am I thinking?” Scaramouche stops himself and second-guesses whether or not he’s actually hungover. There’s no way his sober mind would drift to thoughts of you, right? Clearly something must be wrong with him— he blames Venti for putting all these thoughts in his head with his never-ending discussion of what makes older women so utterly sexy.

He’s then reminded of what Venti told him right before they all sat down to eat your cooking: that if Scaramouche won’t hurry up and fuck his neighbor, Venti will do it for him. Even now, the idea still bothers him for reasons he just can’t quite put his finger on— Venti’s been with tons and tons of people; why does he want Scaramouche’s neighbor too? Can’t Venti see how awkward that would be?

Setting the trash bag down on the floor, Scaramouche takes to the sink to wash out the casserole dish you brought over for them last night. His mind concocts disgustingly vivid images of you as he scrubs at a particularly stubborn piece of dried cheese, and maybe he’d be shocked by how little effort he’s putting into warding those thoughts away if he weren’t so utterly immersed in them. His mind conjures up the image of you in that tiny black bikini he saw you wearing by the pool while he was out smoking on his balcony— he remembers the little number being so small that you had to readjust it every single time you simply sat up or lied down because every last motion was enough to threaten a nipslip. It makes him wonder if you dress like that on purpose or because you’ve deluded yourself into thinking that clothes and swimsuits you used to wear still fit you despite clear evidence otherwise— are you actively vying for the attention of any man who’ll give it to you, or are you brainless enough to throw something on without caring about how poorly or not it fits?

It’s probably a mix of both; you’re just that shameless.

Scaramouche grits his teeth at the mental image of you straddling him while adorned in that tiny little bikini that seems to only get tinier and tinier the longer he allows his imagination to run wild. Of all the fucking things to imagine you doing…

He pictures what you’d look like with your thick, plump thighs enveloping either side of his hips as you run your hands up and down your ample chest and soft stomach. God, he can see it all now: the little bumps of your nipples beading up against the thin fabric of your swimsuit, the soft hang of your tummy spilling over the tiny, flimsy string keeping your bottoms secured around your wide hips, the way your tits would bounce as you ride him…

“Something’s wrong with me,” he grumbles, shaking his head and squeezing his eyes shut. The clump of cheese he’d been scraping at finally separates from the pan, and he realizes that if he wants to rid you from his mind for good, he should take matters into his own hands before Venti does.

No, wait, this has nothing to do with Venti— this isn’t about staking claim over you before any of his friends can, this is solely about him finding ways to release the grip you have on him as if you’re some kind of wicked succubus. Scaramouche glances downwards after setting the dish aside to dry and, much to his chagrin, finds that the mere thought of you was enough to fucking get him hard. The eager press of his cock against the confines of his briefs moritifies him solely because of the very reason why he’s like this in the first place; how the fuck did the thought of you in a bikini so tiny your areolas peek around the sides reduce him to such a state? He’d like to believe that he’s only this hard because it’s been a while since he’s jerked off, but that would be an excuse less believable than any of the ones he’s ever given his friends.

He knows that he’s too dignified to jerk off to the thought of you— if he’s feeling horny, then surely he can find things more deserving of his attention than some hag next door. He refuses to give you that kind of satisfaction (despite the fact that you’d never even know unless he told you, so how could you be smug about it?), so he decides that an ice-cold shower is in order before venturing out to settle things with you.

After a shower so cold Scaramouche swears he saw his fingers begin to turn purple, he dries off, gets dressed in something other than the clothes he fell asleep in last night, grabs your clean casserole dish, and leaves to go to the one place he wouldn’t have ever imagined himself stepping foot in— your apartment. If this is what it takes to sever the connection between you and his mind…

God, this is going to be annoying, Scaramouche thinks as he knocks on your door using his foot, casserole dish supported safely by both of his hands. He feels the need to steel himself because he just knows you’ll answer the door in something sheer, skimpy, or some combination of the two and he needs to be ready for that.

Why? Are you hoping for that to happen, Kuni? Venti’s voice whispers from the back of Scaramouche’s mind.

He really is losing it.

“Good morning— oh, Kuni! This is a surprise,” you greet him upon opening the door, flashing him a smile so bright it nearly makes him cringe. Can you spare him the pleasantries so he can just get to the point?

Fucking Venti— why teach her that nickname? Turning his head to look at a faraway bird instead of you, Scaramouche scoffs. “I need to talk to you.” Straight to the point, emotionless, and rude, it’s all so in-character for your neighbor that you can’t help but giggle.

You grin wider. “Of course. Come in; I’ll put a pot of coffee on.”

Scaramouche waits until you’re a good few steps ahead of him before following you inside, glancing around the living room of your apartment as he makes his way to the kitchen table. Your apartment’s clean, impeccably so at that— every book on your bookshelf faces the same direction, the blanket draped over the back of your couch doesn’t have a single crease, and he can’t see even an ounce of dust on any inch of your tables and countertops.

He snorts a little. Rather than viewing the cleanliness as impressive or inspiring, he bitterly interprets it as a testament to your overabundance of free time and lack of other hobbies or pastimes.

“I’m not sure how strong you like your coffee, so I’ll just make it how I normally do,” you pipe up from the kitchen, pulling Scaramouche away from scrutinizing the titles of the books on your shelf. Restless Summer Nights? The Devil’s Mistress? They all sound like bargain bin erotica novels.

It was a mistake to direct his attention away from your novels and to you instead, he figures, because only now does he get a look at what you’re wearing— if one could even call that clothing. You’re dressed in something he wants to call a workout outfit, but anyone leaving the house in an outfit like that surely has goals other than simply exercising— they want to attract attention. A sports bra that sits so low on your chest that a single bounce on an exercise ball would expose you combines with a pair of spandex leggings so tight they reveal the lines of your panties to comprise your “workout outfit,” and to say that Scaramouche is mortified would be an understatement. He can’t help but find the combination of your manner of dress and your collection of novels completely pathetic.

And despite his apparent disgust… he’s been staring at you long enough to pick up the most minute details about your outfit. The indifferent passerby likely wouldn’t notice your pantylines— a certain amount of staring is required to actually notice them; they’re really not obvious from a quick glance. Actually, why can’t he stop looking at you? He writes it off as a simple morbid curiosity at how someone can be so completely and utterly shameless— one could almost liken his sick, cynical fascination with your ample curves and soft body to rubbernecking.

Scaramouche instead stares down into the cup of coffee you’ve set in front of him like it’s the most fascinating object in the entire world. He’s half-inclined to just close his eyes entirely, seeing as the slightest glimpse of your bust still occupies the uppermost part of his peripheral eyesight when you sit down in the chair opposite of him.

“So,” you start, sliding a porcelain dish with a small bowl of sugar cubes and a saucer of creamer his way. “What can I help you with? It’s rare for you to talk to me first, Kuni.”

He adds “drop that nickname” to his mental list of topics to bring up with you. Scaramouche plucks a few sugar cubes from the bowl before him and drops them into his coffee before absentmindedly stirring the liquid with a serving spoon.

“Last night,” He clears his throat. “Why did you come over to talk to V— to my friends?” Why are you always in my business? he really wants to ask, but he feels like you’ll start crying if he presses you too firmly.

And that’d just be obnoxious.

You giggle. “That makes it sound like I came over on purpose because I knew you had people over, and that’s not true. Haven’t we been in the habit of food delivery and acceptance for months now?” Scaramouche’s eyes follow yours to the squeaky-clean casserole dish he placed on your counter.

“I’m glad your friends seemed to enjoy the food just as much as you do,” you add sweetly, pursing your lips and blowing on your coffee to help it cool down.

“It was humiliating,” Scaramouche counters, a statement that prompts you to look up from your coffee and make eye contact with him. “They wouldn’t— they wouldn’t stop fucking talking about you after you left.”

Wait, that’s not the point here, is it? Surely Scaramouche’s main complaint isn’t that Venti practically sweet-talked you right into his bed, it’s that Scaramouche is tired of you invading his business and his space, right? He doesn’t care about Venti’s comments about your soft tits or your wide hips, he doesn’t care about Aether’s bashful confession that he exclusively jerks off to older women, he doesn’t care that he has competition because there’s nothing to compete over and he’s really, actually, truly angry that you always find a way to worm your way into his days and his mind and his free time and his wet dreams and his—

“Oh, I’m flattered,” you reply simply, sipping your coffee and smiling around the rim of the cup. “They’re such nice boys. I’m glad you have such sweet friends, dear.”

What’s warmer: the tips of Scaramouche’s ears or his untouched cup of coffee?

“That’s not— what? That’s not the point I’m making and you know that,” he grimaces, clearing his throat again. “My friends shouldn’t have to put up with a shameless old hag the way I have to.”

You set your cup down. “That’s not very nice. I look good for my age— that charming boy down at the corner mart always asks for my ID whenever I pick up some wine!”

Scaramouche rolls his eyes. “That’s his job. Anyways, I’m telling you to mind your own business.”

“Oh, is that all? Of course I can do that for you.” Your reply comes without a single skipped beat.

“I mean it, that means don’t touch my mail and— what?” Wait, there’s no way you’re making this this easy. A shameless, conniving, lustful, lewd seductress of a woman like you agreeing to just… fuck off at the first request? Scaramouche doesn’t buy it— this is just another phase of your plan to throw him off guard and pull the rug out from under him so you can sink your claws deeper and deeper into him.

“I like cooking for you and cleaning for you, and I was very happy to meet your friends yesterday, but if you want me to stop, of course I will,” you explain. “I wonder who’ll help me eat my leftovers now… your friend from last night gave me his phone number; does he like potato soup? I’m making that tonight.”

Scaramouche almost, almost feels a shiver tear down his spine. He’s starting to believe that Venti’s just as much an antagonist in this situation as you are.

“Why the fuck did you accept his number? Delete it,” he grumbles, crossing his arms and glaring over at you. His coffee’s surely gone cold by now, but that’s alright— he was never much of a coffee drinker anyways.

You shrug, a sly smile forming on your lips. “Oh, I don’t know. He was so sweet I didn’t want to say no… it’d give me someone new to talk to, if nothing else.” Why do you need to talk to Venti when he barely knows you and I’m right fucking here?

“It’s not like you talk to me much despite all my best efforts, Kuni,” you offer him the subtlest of pouts, an action that would look out of place on the face of a woman your age if you weren’t so… if you weren’t so…

Forget it, he’s not saying anything about you that could be interpreted as a compliment. “…Especially now that you and I have agreed to leave each other alone.”

Oh, Scaramouche doesn’t like this feeling. He hates feeling like a situation has spun out of his control, and that’s, unfortunately, exactly what he feels is happening here. You’ve agreed to his terms and you’ve promised to stay out of his way, so why does he feel so… angry?

Yeah, you must have some underhanded motive here. Why else would you be making this so… easy? That’s not like you at all— he was expecting you to fan your eyelashes, pout your lips, push your tits forward, and whimper that you’re sorry and that you’d love to keep talking to him, so will he please give you a second chance?

I’ll do anything, he was sure you’d say.

You clear your throat. “Well, is there anything else you’d like to discuss now? If not, I’ll get back to my yoga. It’s good to be active, right?”

What the hell? You’re ending the conversation? No way, no how— this ends on Scaramouche’s terms, not yours. Who do you think you are?

“No, that’s not it, actually,” he blurts, crossing his arms over his chest. “Staying out of my business means staying away from Venti— from any of my friends. Don’t talk to them, don’t text them, don’t— I don’t know. Don’t be around them.”

You smile a little wider. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you sound jealous, Kuni.”

He scoffs, staring you directly in the eye as if to challenge you. “Seriously? Shit joke.”

Of all the adjectives you could have picked to describe him… “It’s just that the thought of you getting with Venti is nauseating, alright?”

You hum. “And why him specifically, hm? You had other friends over last night— are they single?” Jesus Christ, what is this, an interrogation? And where the hell are these sorts of questions coming from— did you already send Venti an invitation to hook up?

Sneering so hard his nose scrunches up, Scaramouche can’t help but feel appalled. “Did you decide I’m not good enough or something? Who do you think you are?”

You go silent.

Scaramouche, somehow, goes even quieter than silent when the weight of his words finally sets in. There it is— the culmination of your grand plan to humiliate, embarrass, and utterly demean him in your own home. You had this outcome planned from the start, didn’t you?

“I didn’t say that,” you stammer, attempting to correct yourself. “Why do you think I’ve been vying for your attention all this time? Of course I like you, Kuni.”

God, how you piss him off. Who do you think you are— some bashful schoolgirl confessing to her first crush?

“I know that I’m just an old woman and that you could certainly find a cute, young, perky college girl whenever you’d like to, but if you’d ever like me…”

Of course Scaramouche could get someone his age from one of his classes— he doesn’t need to settle for some loose old hag— and yet… the thought of you getting with anyone else, Venti or not, pisses him off in a way he can’t quite describe. Maybe he views himself as some kind of hero protecting everyone else from your shamelessness, maybe he views himself as the only one worthy of your attention as the one who has to put up with you the most, maybe he views you as someone actually, genuinely worth being with…

He sits up a little straighter. “You have no idea how obnoxious you are,” he mutters. “Taking up my time and attention even when you’re not around.”

“What a forked tongue,” you reply, leaning forward and, much to Scaramouche’s chagrin, pushing your breasts together with your hands. “You know that’s why I like you, right? Mean boys have always been my favorite— ever since high school.”

“You’re not worth the time,” he spits. So fucking annoying. So fucking shameless. What kind of woman your age behaves this way, anyway? So obnoxious, so pathetic, so intoxicating, so impossible-to-keep-out-of-his-mind—

“Venti sure seems to think I am,” you offer with a smug, self-satisfied smile as you rise from your seat. Hooking your thumbs up under the straps of your sports bra, you quickly snap the elastic fabric back against your shoulders to give your tits a little bounce, an action that, of course, does not go unnoticed. Slapping his hands down flat against the perfectly-ironed lacy tablecloth covering your dining room table and standing up so quickly he nearly knocks his knees against the table’s hardwood underside, Scaramouche laughs.

What a time to finally, finally accept that he has the hots for his neighbor— the same neighbor who’s supposedly the cause of so many of his bad days and sour moods. You’ve prompted many a disdainful mutter from Scaramouche after catching a glimpse of you through your drawn curtains, you’ve been the subject of many a snide comment made in the presence of his friends, and, most frustratingly of all, you’ve inspired countless, countless inappropriate thoughts that he cannot believe you’ve been the subject of.

And all it took was one of his friends hitting on you for him to realize that.

“Constantly flaunting a body like this,” he chides in a way that he wants to come off as insulting and condescending rather than sadistically flattering, but the little grin you offer in response gives him reason to believe you interpreted it as the latter. Seriously?

“Other boys your age seem to enjoy the flaunting,” you counter, slipping your thumbs into the waistband of your spandex leggings. As if to tease the act of pulling them all the way down your legs, you flip the fabric of your waistband over its seam to expose the majority of your soft lower belly.

Anger burns hot behind his pale cheeks. “Is this some kind of pathetic hobby of yours? Fucking guys half your age?”

“I like to consider it a lifestyle,” you reply, shimmying your leggings further and further down your thick thighs until your thong’s completely exposed. A black lace thong— how becoming of a nymphomanic like yourself. “I’m fine with trading experience for virility and stamina; do you know how many men my age finish in thirty seconds and call it there because they’re ‘just so tired’? College boys either go until they can’t hold themselves upright or until they have nothing left to pump into me.”

There’s that vulgar nature that’s both irritated and (subconciously) aroused him for months. He wants to believe that your disgusting nature doesn’t make his cock twitch, but the time for pretending has clearly passed. You don’t believe he finds you ugly or unappealing and neither does he anymore.

“And do you find this… lifestyle fulfilling?” Scaramouche challenges, grimacing at the pressure building in the frontside of his tight jeans.

You laugh. “Is that your way of saying you don’t? Are you a virgin, sweetheart?”

“Of course not. Just because some of us don’t fuck everything with two legs and a pulse doesn’t mean we’re virgins.” His clumsy escapades are none of your business— his high school girlfriend and that guy from the concert Venti dragged him to over the summer don’t concern you.

Bending forward to push your leggings down to your knees, you gaze up at Scaramouche through your eyelashes and giggle. “Don’t make it sound like I don’t savor every last cock or strap I ride. You could put every last one of them in front of me and I’d be able to tell you who they belong to with my eyes shut.”

Venti mentioned something about experience, didn’t he? What a sanitized way of calling older women complete and total whores.

The inferiority complex in Scaramouche wants to prove that he’s the best thing a whore like you will ever experience, that he can make you feel better than any of the other bumbling college morons he probably knows can, and that you’ll give up your ways of fucking everyone that looks at you in order to devote yourself to him and him alone. That’d be some nice payback for all the pain and humiliation you’ve subjected him to these past couple of months, right?

No, he has a better idea.

“If you want to show yourself off that badly,” Scaramouche huffs, doing his damndest to ignore the nearly-painful throbbing in his jeans. “Then I’m sure you’d be fine with doing it in front of that glass door, right?”

With your hands still bunched in the fabric of your leggings, you look back at the glass sliding door that leads to your balcony and bite your lip. It’s not likely anyone would actually see you— you and Scaramouche live on the third floor— but it’s still a possibility and an exciting thought nonetheless. Maybe you could give that nice redheaded quarterback boy you fucked a few months ago a nice show; he lives just across the parking lot in the building parallel to yours.

“Now who’s the deviant one? I’ve never fucked anywhere more public than a nightclub’s bathroom stall,” you tease, finally pushing your leggings all the way down and off your legs. He doesn’t believe you, but Christ, those thighs of yours look soft…

You accept his offer nonetheless and make your way over to the balcony door, your thong riding high on your wide hips and your hardened nipples pressing into the flimsy fabric of your pathetic excuse of a sports bra. “You’re helping me wipe off all the fingerprints afterwards,” you scold, inviting him over with a wiggle of your hips and a glance back over your shoulder.

Now, rationally, Scaramouche would never propose the idea of fucking in a place as public as right in front of an apartment complex parking lot. He’s never considered himself an exhbitionist and he’s always been somewhat obsessed with his image, and people who care about their image generally don’t have sex in the potential presence of others. Additionally, there’s probably something to be said about him potentially getting caught fucking the same woman he’s spent the better half of this past year complaining about, but the current irrational, horny, angry Scaramouche wouldn’t listen to better judgement or rationality anyways.

The relief that comes with unbuttoning his jeans and giving his almost painfully-hard cock room to breathe is so euphoric he can’t help but sigh, the throbbing in his crotch more aggravating than any pounding headache he’s ever experienced after an evening drinking with his friends.

“I can’t fucking believe it,” he laughs, incredulous. “To think the hag living next door to me is the reason I’m like this.” Jamming the weight of his bulge into the plumpness of your soft ass, Scaramouche seizes hold of your hips in both of his hands and gives the fat of your love handles a painful squeeze just to hear you suck the air in through your teeth.

“I thought you’d never come around, you know,” you breathe, beyond eager at the prospect of finally, finally getting to fuck the neighbor boy you’ve been actively working at breaking for months upon months now. A guy this mean, this arrogant, and this demeaning doesn’t come around that often, especially when so many of the guys you get with take the polite route by calling you “ma’am” and complimenting you over and over again— which certainly isn’t a bad thing, but cruel has always satisfied you in ways that kind cannot.

The height difference between the two of you means that Scaramouche has to stand up a little straighter than he normally does in order to press his hips against yours, a realization that’s only slightly humiliating. Granted, it could never compare to how humiliating it was for you to show up at his apartment in front of all his friends.

God, does it feel good to put you in your place.

“Spread,” Scaramouche mutters, knocking one of his feet against both of your ankles. He doesn’t tell you that he needs you to spread your legs so your hips will lower a bit, allowing him to reach them a little more easily since you’re a bit taller than he is.

You would tease him for skipping the foreplay and just jamming himself right into you, but you know that you’ve been plenty wet enough ever since your discussion with him first wandered to sex and masturbation. Well, that, and if you had to wait another minute to get the cock you’ve been so desperate for for so long now, you very well may go crazy. It’s taken months, but you can already tell that it was all so, so worth it.

Running his knuckles down the center of your thong, Scaramouche relishes in the smug satisfaction that comes with realizing that you’re wet. It’s equal parts arousing and equal parts pathetic— just how desperate are you for any cock you can get your hands on?

“You’ve already kept me waiting for months,” you say with a pout cast back at him from over your shoulder. “Why make me wait even longer when I’m right here?”

“Shameless and impatient,” he remarks with a frustrated huff. “Can’t you do something good with your life or yourself for once and just be quiet?”

As tempting as it is to make a teasing quip in return to only further rile up your angsty neighbor boy, a frenzied giggle is the only sound you can muster up when you feel the firm press of a cock against your clothed pussy. Even through your flimsy thong, you can tell that he’s hard, which is a reward in its own right. It’s what you’ve wanted to achieve since the very first time he caught you half-naked watering plants on your balcony— is it so wrong for you to want to rile up the cutie next door?

Scaramouche roughly yanks your thong down to hang around your lower thighs, leaving you entirely on display for him when you follow suit by tugging your sports bra up to your collarbone. The cool, smooth glass against your bare tits is an unfamiliar sensation, but it’s certainly not an unwelcome one— especially when you remember that anyone could look up from across the parking lot and get an eyeful of your bare tits squished up against the glass door.

“I wish I could watch you sink it in for the first time,” you hum, reaching down between your legs to part the outer lips of your cunt for him a little wider. “In front of a mirror or something maybe. Wouldn’t that be romantic?”

Scaramouche rolls his eyes. “Yeah, because you’re the spitting image of the romantic type.” There’s no way you consider him the romantic type, is there? He’s not going to hold your hands and whisper in your ear about how cute you are, you know.

Damn it, you’ve got him actually wanting you more than he’s ever wanted you before— this makes all his filthy fantasies about taking you bent over your kitchen counter or being underneath you while you ride him into oblivion look like a cheap, budget porno from a video rental store. His desire has always been real—albeit subconscious, sure—but it feels so much more genuine now that it’s been realized.

“Don’t say a word about this to anyone,” he mumbles in a brief moment of humiliation, biting into his bottom lip as he finally, finally sinks the full length of his cock into you.

Jesus Christ, if there’s anything Venti’s ever been right about, it’s how good a mature pussy feels. You’re soaked all the way down to your inner thighs, you’re so warm Scaramouche nearly feels his knees give out from underneath him, and you squeeze him so well he can feel your pussy gripping the sensitive underside of his tip.

“Why not? I can invite your friend next time,” you propose, squealing with delight when Scaramouche slaps a hand down against the side of your ass. “Venti, right? It’d feel so good to have my ass used while you—“

“Just shut up,” he hisses bitterly, glaring at you hard enough to give himself a stress headache. “Don’t talk about other guys right now. Especially not ones I know.”

“You’re right, it’s rude to talk about other men when I have such a good one right here with me already,” you feign sympathy, pushing your hips back flat against the front of his thighs. “Oh, Kuni.”

There’s that damn nickname again. As much as he hates the idea of you using it to tease him or fluster him, he can’t deny the way his dick twitches whenever you coo it in that soft, sultry tone of yours. It’s like you were custom-made to gobble men up or something— just how many of his classmates have you fucked?

Oh, it doesn’t matter. Not when he knows he can establish himself as the best of the whole damn lot of them. Not when he knows that he gets the privilege of seeing you every single day and nobody, nobody else does. Not when he’s seen your cute nipples peeking at him through that tiny, flimsy pajama top he caught you in all those months ago. Not when he gets to peruse on over to your apartment whenever he wants because you’re right fucking there and nobody, nobody is physically closer to you than he is.

Jesus, this is all starting to sound like some kind of crush.

“How’s that?” Scaramouche taunts, slapping his hips against you so wildly the sound of skin smacking on skin almost drowns out his voice. He’d like to claim that this sort of pace is supposed to be punishing, and he’d be right if he were to say that, but he wants it hard and rough just as much as you surely do. He couldn’t stop his hips even if he wanted to because he knows there’s nothing he’s wanted to do more than fuck your brains out for months upon months now.

You don’t answer him, too preoccupied with relishing in the feeling of his cock pounding into you with everything he’s got. How befitting of Scaramouche to fuck you like he’s angry at you— if he could even claim to be mad anymore. The combined sensations of his hips hammering against yours, his fingernails digging into your soft, plump love handles, and his balls slapping against your ass on each thrust are all far too overwhelming to even attempt a reply.

“Seriously? You run your mouth for ages and now you shut up when I ask you a question?” You’re doing this on purpose— Jesus, you’re insatiable.

Your back arches when Scaramouche digs the tip of his cock into a particularly sensitive spot inside of you, a broken whine leaving your lips instead when you attempt to reply with a dirty quip. He laughs when he realizes what’s just happened— that’s certainly one way to get you to shut that filthy mouth of yours.

“I hope somebody’s watching you, actually,” he admits despite all the jealousy even a single mention of his friend stirred up in him. “That way they can see you’re not worth their time because you don’t value yourself whatsoever. Why would anyone want someone who’s happy to just give themselves away like this and get fucked in a place so public?”

Maybe that’s just a weird, roundabout way of saying I want someone to watch me fuck you so they know a whore like you has been whipped into shape and that you only want me now. Who’s to say?

“You don’t care about getting caught yourself?” You finally pipe up with a grin.

Scaramouche snorts. “Getting caught with the likes of you? I’d transfer universities.”

You pout. “Would I still get to see you?”

For whatever reason, the question catches him off guard. How many times does he need to remind you that you’re not his girlfriend, that you’re not some sweetheart with an innocent crush, that you’re just his fucking neighbor who just so happens to have a hot body and just so happens to feel so, so good around him like this and just so happens to be the subject of his wet dreams and fantasies and—

He’s only able to spit out one word. “Obnoxious.”

His hands reclaim a firm grasp on your ample hips before he takes to fucking into you at a whole new angle— one that’ll surely hit that spot that got you to shut the fuck up moments ago. Your hands clamor for anything you could possibly grab onto to steel yourself, but there’s nothing except for the cool, flat glass beneath your palms.

“Kuni,” you rasp in a broken voice, beyond impressed with his ability to have found your most sensitive spot and target it specially. Call it sheer dumb luck or a testament to how perfectly compatible your bodies are, it doesn’t matter. He won’t let up on it until you’ve collapsed— maybe it’ll be a nice change of pace from your partners being the ones to collapse after an evening with you.

With the task of finding something to hold onto having proven fruitless, you instead slip a hand back between your legs to rub at your clit. Scaramouche snickers at your apparent desperation to orgasm, but he’s not letting you off that easily.

“What a pathetic display,” he remarks, pounding into you so quickly you can barely register the full length of his cock before he’s pulling it all the way out of you again. With your legs trembling and your knees buckling, the possibility of actually collapsing underneath him is becoming increasingly likely— these wild, frenzied thrusts of his prove exactly why you’re so into college guys.

Looking down from the fuzzy reflection of your face in the glass, Scaramouche watches each sink of his cock into your tight, dripping cunt with all the intensity and attention of a virgin. It may as well be his first time— you feel so fucking good he’s starting to lose his train of thought. You take him all the way to the hilt on each thrust so easily that he’d absolutely call you a common whore if he were able to form even a single word.

Despite his inability to form a coherent sentence, Scaramouche finds that he has just enough rationality left to pull out mere seconds before coming all over the swell of your ass, his cock twitching in his hand as he bites back moans. Here he is, coming all over the soft ass of his obnoxious older neighbor lady after spending so many months convincing his friends that he does not, in fact, want to fuck her.

You laugh breathlessly, the hand between your legs still rubbing frantic circles over your clit as you attempt to reach your own orgasm as well. “What’s wrong with coming inside? I’m hurt.”

Scaramouche rolls his eyes. That’d be irresponsible.

“Well, that’s alright,” you chirp, standing upright and turning around to face him. “I can always wring it out of you myself, right?”

“You’re insatiable,” he replies, inching backwards towards the couch as you step forward in time with his footsteps.

“Pot, kettle. You’re still hard, Kuni.”

With the realization that he’ll need some kind of excuse to offer his friends when he inevitably returns to a slew of unread messages a few hours from now, he falls backwards onto the couch just before you make yourself comfortable in his lap.

Well, not that any of them have ever believed any vague, half-baked excuse Scaramouche gives.

#hiiiii #juju bakery #scaramouche smut #scaramouche x reader #genshin smut #genshin impact smut #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #scaramouche x y/n #kunikuzushi smut #fem reader

[yoma198]

7️⃣x🍞

#jjk anime #jujutsu kaisen #nanami kento #jujuプラス #じゅじゅプラス #ナナミン #七海建人 #kento nanami #headcanon nanami #nanami au #nanami x bakery lady #yuji itadori #gojo satoru #sukuna #nanami kento jjk

[charlietheepicwriter7]

Ghost Brother Au resurrecting just like our best boy Danny

Le Phantome

My Brain: Okay, so the exact timeline is-- Me: Shut up about the timeline, shut up about the timeline!!

Danny was a member of the Casper High French class when he was in Amity Park. he wasn’t good at it, but it got him by. unfortunately for Danny, he forgot about the Annual Senior Year Trip to Paris.

Danny is working with his parents when Valerie of all people walks into the bakery.

Que spiderman meme

Marinette watches them interact; this is the first person from Danny’s past to ever find him and she’s curious. Is she a friend? An ex-girlfriend? She’s nosy.

They’re thrilled to see each other again, even though Danny is hiding that they know each other from the Dupain-Chengs. Valerie spent the last three years thinking Danny was dead He says that he ran bc he was hiding from the ghost that killed his family, which is true from a certain point of view. They exchange numbers.

Valerie gives his number to Vlad.

Valerie has basically become a full-blown employee of Vlad at this point, still not knowing he’s a half-ghost. Ghosts are still in Amity Park, just not as much in number, probably left over juju from the Fenton portal. Obviously she’s going to report that the boy he’s been looking for for years is in Paris.

Vlad, still a fruitloop and having next to no idea on what actually happened during Ultimate Enemies, is determined to get his soon-to-be son.

What happened from Vlad’s PoV: Danny got caught cheating and the entire family, friends, and teacher met at the Nasty Burger. A ghost--identity unknown--attacks and Danny fights him, but the nasty burger blows up in the process. Everyone dies (and for a while, Vlad thinks Danny died too) and the mysterious ghost is in the wind.

he knows a vague description of the mystery ghost/dan. White flaming hair, black and white suit with a cape, green skin and pointed ears. whoever vlad interrogated didn’t see the phantom symbol on Dan’s chest though

Vlad, instead of being happy that Danny’s been found, is furious. Instead of coming to him after his family died, Danny ran away across the ocean, and even allowed some random people to adopt him!? Even though Vlad’s been trying to find him, even though Vlad was there the entire time!?

He wants his son. Now.

Vlad calls Danny, scaring him, threatening his family. Danny is horrified and furious, but manages to negotiate a meeting, telling Vlad that he’d explain everything. Vlad has reservations at Le Grand Paris at lunch. Danny agrees to go.

Danny tells his parents that he can’t work around noon, he’s eating lunch with someone. Alya is there (sleepover?) and tries to interrogate him about where he’s going and who he’s going with, but Danny shuts it down.

Marinette thinks that he’s going to eat out with Valerie from the other day. Danny’s never dated before (to her knowledge) or even had a crush (again to her knowledge), so Alya convinces her to follow Danny.

Danny dresses himself to the nines, due to the location of their meeting, but takes the time to slip on one of the first bracelets Marinette made for him when he moved it. It’s made of yarn and clay beads, but he loves it. It’s from his new life.

Danny arrives at the restaurant at Le Grand Paris, though he’s there early and takes a seat inside. Alya and Marinette can’t get in at first, but because her mom’s the chef, they get a table nearby.

they’re wearing comically bad disguises, but Danny’s so distracted that he doesn’t notice them.

Chloe spots them and tries to throw a fit, but they fill her in on the deets---aka, Danny’s on a date and they’re spying. I’ve decided that Chloe has a crush on both Danny and Kaitou LeBlanc (non-reciprocated of course), so she’s immediately down to clown with the other girls.

Imagine their confusion when some middle-aged man sits down at the table.

Danny fully intended to tell Vlad what happened. It’s been years, he’s had therapy, but when he tries to tell Vlad... he chokes.

It doesn’t help that Vlad is being a total a-hole about this. Insulting the hotel, the city, Danny’s grasp on the French language (which has improved dramatically, he’s proud to report). Vlad doesn’t particularly care about answers, he wants the son he was promised.

Vlad gives an ultimatum; Danny comes with him willingly and Vlad won’t destroy his family. He’s a powerful man; he can shut down one little bakery, get one girl expelled from school, get two parents arrested for kidnapping. Vlad can ruin them.

It should be noted that Vlad didn’t know about the current situation in Paris. The Mayor had been keeping it quiet. If he’d known, he would have arranged for their conversation to occur outside the boards of the city.

Neither man nor teen notice the butterfly landing on his bracelet.

“Le Phantome, I am Hawkmoth. I will grant you the power to retaliate against the man threatening your family. In return, all I ask is for Ladybug and Chat Noir’s Miraculous.”

Danny knew he should say no. He should fight. But two words slipped out instead. “Yes, Hawkmoth.”

A black, bubbling ooze overtook Danny. In his place was a man with green skin and pointed ears, flaming white hair, and a black and white supersuit with a cape. Almost exactly like Dan.

Taglist: @bee-a-garbage-shipper @cell113 @burningprincesssuit @tgfangirl4eva @winter-rose-wolf @princertain @bean2342 @obnoxious-avian-personal @nillajinx @imspectralboiii @readlikereblogrepeat @iglowinggemma28 @letterlust @lysslovsanime @pinkcc1 @darkthunder1589 @jdc1717 @henloamkitty @theauthorandtheartist @spinatelle @murlinmouse @arken-99 @mango-mush

#ghost brother au #mlb crossover #danny phantom crossover #danny fenton #marinette dupain cheng #valerie grey #vlad masters #Kaitou LeBlanc #ultimate enemy au #season 3 au

[yunalinwrites]

jjk fics i'll never write (but maybe you will!)

i have a bunch of fic ideas i dont think i'll ever get to bc saved by the bell is taking rlly long and i don't have a lot of time (╥﹏╥)

i still wanna see them come to life tho so i think im just gonna throw them out there for anyone who wants to use lol

idk maybe ill write these eventually but even in that case im not gonna stop anyone else from using them as well

go ahead and alter however u like, but tag me if u use!! im letting u peek in my brain >:)

and even if ur not a writer these can just b like imagination prompts for when u go to bed LMAO

"love is work" - nanami kento x reader

summary: title is self-explanatory tbh--the idea that nanami kento views love as work could be applied to any scenario. but, i think it would be interesting for the reader to be the person he meets at the bakery. maybe the bakery is a family business, so the reader's work is literally driven by familial love. although, im not sure if that means they agree or disagree with nanami about love being work.

alternatively, the reader could be a co-worker of nanami's.

conflicts/themes:

serving oneself vs. serving others

what makes love/work worth it?

"meet cute" - fushiguro megumi x reader

there are so many canon strangers to lovers opportunities with megumi lol.

like, being the person "hitting on" (asking for directions from) fushiguro during that one juju stroll.

or the person getting robbed and saved by the 1st year crew, also from juju stroll. (also applicable for yuji and nobara x reader)

there's also the light novel chapter where megumi and yuji stalk gojo at a maid cafe, so maybe the reader works at the maid cafe, and the very stoic but handsome megumi catches their eye. this scenario could also be applicable to yuji x reader or gojo x reader.

there's also an original scenario i was thinking of cuz megumi likes reading (specifically non fiction) so what if the reader was a worker at a book store or a librarian. maybe they know about sorcery already because they read a non-fic book about it and recognize his uniform when he walks in.

also i haven't seen a megumi x tsumiki's friend!reader, esp considering that one girl when tsumiki is confronting megumi about bullying lol. this one could have an interesting conflict bc that girl urged tsumiki to do the test of courage that ended up getting her cursed! so then how would megumi deal with his love interest (the reader) also being the person somewhat at fault for his sister's demise?

not a meet-cute prompt but generally i think it would b interesting in any megumi fic for gojo to be a conflict. like, as megumi's father figure, he doesn't want megumi to end up like him and suguru, so he's very hesitant about letting megumi fall in love with someone since "love is the most twisted curse of them all." but i think in the end, he might realize that love/the reader is exactly what will stop megumi from turning into suguru, so gojo ends up giving the reader his blessing.

"sugar makes blood thicker" - geto suguru x reader

tw: spoilers for gojo's past/hidden inventory/star plasma vessel/premature death arc, angst, DARK CONTENT, self-destructive behaviors, self-harm, eating disorders

summary: reader is a student at jujutsu high in 2006, alongside geto and gojo. reader is from the kamo clan and uses blood manipulation. they've been taught to keep a very strict diet to optimize the viscosity of their blood. just like how geto hates the taste of cursed spirits, reader hates the taste of their diet. they fall in love with each other, because they've finally met someone that makes them feel understood.

if you want to go even darker, the reader's technique may involve cutting (kind of like marie from gen v)

conflicts/themes:

what's the point of fighting for a world that's done nothing for you in return? ("what has the world done for me lately?")

sugar makes blood thicker, which i can imagine is harder to control for a blood manipulation user

gojo satoru is the opposite of the reader: he eats however he pleases, which includes lots of sweets, so it's hard for the reader to be around him/doesn't like him. as a result, it's also hard for geto to have to pick sides between his best friend and the reader

ending: canon ending; geto chooses reader over gojo; they turn evil and run away together with nanako and mimiko. although it could also be interesting for geto to choose gojo over the reader, or if there's somehow a happy ending for everyone here.

I have no title for this one but gojo x megumi's older sister reader

self-explanatory. during the 2006 arc, after gojo kills toji. they raise megumi together <3

"if only i could go back" - any character x reader

summary: this is pretty self-indulgent lol this one's for everyone who wants to heal everyone's trauma and just have a happy ending lmao. i had this idea of the reader either being a sorcerer or a curse who has the power to grant one wish but in doing so sacrifices themselves (they die). so, obviously, they're in high demand by everyone:

megumi wants to heal his sister

gojo wants to bring suguru back

geto wants to rid the world of non-sorcerers

toji wants his wife back

shoko wants her friends back

etc

some situations the reader may find themselves in are being held at the school so that nobody can use their power unless absolutely necessary. or maybe they were captured by the curse users.

technicalities about the reader's power: they can't grant their own wish, but they have full autonomy over whose wish they can grant, meaning the only way that someone could get their wish granted is through befriending and persuading the reader.

conflicts/themes:

characters having to choose between their wish (which kills the reader) and their fondness of the reader (wanting the reader to stay)

will they truly be happy if their wishes are granted?

how does the reader feel about being the method of people's desires but not actually being the desire?

***

alr im done yapping

#jjk x reader #jjk #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #fanfic #my writing #writing #jjk fanfic #jjk x you #geto suguru #geto x reader #geto x y/n #suguru #geto x you #nanami kento #jjk nanami #nanami x reader #kento nanami #suguru geto #jjk megumi #megumi fushiguro #megumi x reader

[uptoolateart]

Some Love Square holiday snaps from Paris - Part 2:

Visiting the Eiffel Tower - some weird juju happened to make Marinette and Ladybug appear at the same time:

At the Musee d'Orsay:

At the Grevin Wax Museum:

If you look reeeeeaaally hard at the bottom, you'll see Marinette outside her bakery:

A full moon over Paris:

#mlb #ml fandom #miraculous ladybug #mlb fandom #adrien agreste #chat noir #cat noir #marichat #ladrien #ladynoir #adrinette #adrienette #ml adrien #marinette dupain cheng #ml marinette #paris photos

[promptseverlark]

The Photograph - 10th Letter

A letter from Finnick. Some bromance from the person who always has Peeta's back.

AO3  FFN

.....

1 June

  Dear Peeta,

What's up, brother? I haven't heard from you in ages. How's the small town in South Dakota treating you? You're not turning into a cattle nurse, are you? I heard there is more livestock in your small district there than people. It might be interesting to move there for a while because we're getting slammed here in town. There are so many clumsy and crazy tourists flocking the district for the summer, and we get all sorts of cases. You name it, we got it! From sprained ankles to leeches on the ear, to weird insect bites, to broken pinkies, and to many car-related accidents. Drunk drivers need to be jailed longer, I tell you. Seriously, they should monitor the highways better this time because collisions have been happening left and right -- it's like the roads are cursed. We need a more experienced staff of your caliber now than ever. The research department had to slow down its studies because we have too many patients daily.

But hey, don't worry, Peet. I won't ask you to come back to the hospital. I know you're much better there staying away from here.

Annie is a whole different story, though. She's asking for you, brother. You know her due date is in the next two weeks. She wants you here, Peet. I kind of agree with her too. As much as I don't want to admit it, you have that calming juju about you that relaxes my Annie. You two understand each other on another level. So file that leave for three weeks, and help me out with my very pregnant wife and future son. I need a babysitter, an alternate, and my best friend -- basically my brother. You know I only have you, Peet. Shit, this has turned to me asking for you because of Annie to me asking for you too! So, you got to do this for me, brother. My first baby is giving me all the wiggles.

Can I count on you, Peeta? I know you love me, man. Come on, don’t make me beg.

  xoxo,

Finnick

  P.S. Bring some of those honey salt walnut brownies that Annie loves when you come here, okay? She's been craving it like crazy and bugging the local bakery to make them. She's turning into a grinch -- she is adorably scary! This is my Annie right here. She needs her fix of deliciousness STAT!

P.P.S. Did you see the cover of Capitol Magazine last month? Katniss did it! She photographed that Amur snow leopard hybrid. The small column about her at the end of the article said that she's out to get the next elusive animal in the wild. A jabberjay and a mockingbird hybrid or something. Mockingjay, I think, is what she called it. I guess your girl's moving on with her life. That's good, right? So stop downing yourself about her. You've done your time, Peet. There's no point in shaming yourself with the mistakes of your past forever. You have changed so much from that bitter, angry, and lonely young man. That's no longer you. You worked hard to better yourself all these years. Don't throw it all away or downplay all your efforts. Allow yourself to heal. You did your time and paid your dues if you want to look at it that way. 

Time to move on and find your piece of happiness in the world, brother. I know you will never find another girl like Katniss. She really meant so much to you. You truly did love her, I know you did. You shouldn’t be mad at yourself for finding her love. Don't let this guilt consume you. All you wanted was to make her happy.

Peeta, you do deserve love in your life again. Think about it, okay? See you soon, my brother.

.....

#prompt filled

[crimsonxveil]

LOCATION: JUJU DELIGHTS BAKERY MUSE: BETH GREENE

Beth was settling into her new normal but didn't mean she didn't miss her family, miss her children and the community she had built but on the plus size in this world there was no zombies. She didn't have to always lose people to death or see the ones she loved get torn apart. She didn't always have to worry how many supplies she had or anything like that but she just wished there was another familiar face in the city. She was standing in line at the bakery wanting to get some donuts to bring to the little ones at the daycare.

#ohqstarter #︱beth︱· opens

[imaginethreehouses]

Hi !Can i have a male match up please ? Physically: I’m a 5.2 chubby french girl  with long light copper wavy hair mostly tied up in a bun.I have really dark brown eyes and glasses,really pale skin with freckles(my pfp is me) Personnality: I am an ISFJ,libra and I have a mom energy if we listen to my 3 older brothers,nephews. With my loved one I am affectionate,clumsy and I love teasing and cracks jokes but I am also quite sarcastic,blunt if needed.In public I will be calm and a little less expressive but towards my loved ones my behavior remains the same Besides, I get angry pretty quickly when I'm faced with disrespect or injustice. Nevertheless, I'm always careful not to raise my voice. Hobby: I like listening to music,reading,singing,baking,cooking.I am also a smoker.I play a lot of video games and watch anime. Fun fact: I am very spirituaI. I love wearing many jewelry (rings almost at all finger,double necklace). I never wear my glasses. I live on coffee,tea and energy drink (It's okay for me but not for you take care of yourself ahah). My signature scent is Rose.I always wear red lipstick and black nailpolish I have many nicknames and it can be confusing for people(Ju,Juju,mum,Rose).And my name is Julie-Rose ! I work on a bakery where I sell Croissant,baguette,pain au chocolat,many others pastries and good things.And I also know the gossip but that’s another thing ahah. I’m 20 btw. I have a dog didi (and she’s the custest and I don’t take criticism). I hope that you’re okay !

Hi!! Thank you for sending in the request 🥰 Sorry it took so long to get to, the heatwave that hit my city turned my brain into a puddle of slime for a couple of weeks LMAO. I hope you like the match!

I match you with... Jeritza! ❤

Sorry, I know I'm taking a bit of a risk here because most people don't like him. But hear me out!

Right off the bat, thematically, well, he has a rose motif and your lipstick/nail polish color match with his own choices of color so well? You just look like you fit together to me 🥰

Also, Jeritza loves sweets, so you working at a bakery and baking as a hobby would make him so happy. He would always be trying everything you bake and be so appreciative of it. He would also love it if you teach him to bake!

Speaking of sweets, when you get to know him, he is so, so sweet. Hopefully with time and some encouragement your dog would warm up to him as well. He loves animals so he will be so happy when it happens!

In the meantime, he would show your love for both you and your dog through letters and gifts. He would also do all your chores for you, if you let him.

He would try to gently encourage you to take better care of yourself, wear your glasses when you need them and be careful not to drink too much coffee and energy drinks... 🤭

After all that happened with his family, he has probably never even thought of having children. But seeing you be cute and happy arounds kids would start putting ideas in his mind.

If things ever came to it (and in the world of fe3h, let's face it, they might), you'd have a personal knight at your beck and call to fight for your ideals, on your behalf.

He's been dealing with a lot so fighting for justice has not really been a thing that's on his mind. But seeing you be passionate about your beliefs would inspire him a lot.

When it comes to getting intimate, Jeritza is incredibly soft and gentle with his caresses and kisses and the like. He's scared that he will hurt you, even if it's been years since he last turned into the death knight.

He may be in a difficult situation but he's actually the sweetest if you give him a chance?? He would worship you and give you the world.

He would suck at video games and likely not get most anime but I promise, he would try 🤣

❤ Other possibilities: Sylvain, Dedue, Hubert.

#fe3h matchups #fe3h matches #jeritza von hyrm

[nate-the-bee]

Home's Honey Bee Bakery Menu!

A list of confections, sweets, and baked treats you can buy at the Honey Bee Bakery! Prices vary from blown kisses, warm hugs, and kind compliments!

Cakes (heart-shaped cakes in a variety of flavours like chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, red velvet, marshmallow, rose, and milk-and-honey) Price: 3 kisses, 1 extra-long hug, or 4 compliments.

Petit fours (small, heart-shaped cakes of various flavours and icings, usually pink, red, white, and chocolate brown) Price each: 1 kiss, 1 short hug, or 1 sweet word.

Smackarons (delicate macarons shaped like hearts and honeycombs): 1 kiss or 1 warm hug

Snickerdoodles (heart-shaped, sugar-cinnamon cookies that make you smile and giggle) Price: 1 funny story or 1 compliment

Jollypops (heart-shaped lollipops that come in a variety of flavours like strawberry, cherry, raspberry, rosehip, and honey) Price: 1 funny joke or 2 kisses

Ginger-bread (heart-shaped pastries that make you feel more lively and happy) Price: 2 compliments or 1 funny story

Honeybuns (swirly bakery buns with a pink honey icing) Price: 3 hugs or 2 compliments

Royal Jelly (rose and strawberry panna cotta drizzled in chocolate sauce) Price: 2 kisses or 1 hug

Pink Honey (rose-and-strawberry flavoured honey in a pink jar. Home made!) Price: 1 long, warm hug, or 1 kiss

Juju Bees (pink, red, white, and brown gumdrops in strawberry, cherry, vanilla, and chocolate flavours) Price: 3 compliments or 2 kisses

Pretzels (heart-shaped soft pretzels that can come covered in various kinds of chocolate or pink yogurt) Price: 1 tongue twister

Cotton Candy (pink and white sugar spun until it's as fluffy as a cloud in the sky! It comes in strawberry and vanilla flavours) Price: a cute story/a spun yarn

Laughy Taffy (hand-pulled taffy guaranteed to make you giggle. Comes in strawberry, cherry, raspberry, and vanilla) Price: a cute joke or riddle

Nice Cream (ice cream with compliments on the wrapper; it's as sweet as can bee!) Price: 2 compliments

Chocolates (a variety of assorted chocolates that come ribbon-wrapped in a heart-shaped box) Price: 3 kisses

Beignets (puffy donuts filled with chocolate, hazelnut cream, strawberry jam, or rose jelly. Topped with powdered sugar and a drizzle of pink honey) Price each: 1 long, warm hug

Crêpes (thin pancakes rolled up around sweet cream and fruit) Price: 3 hugs

Éclairs (long, round pastries iced with chocolate and filled with cream) Price each: 2 kisses, 1 hug, or 2 compliments

Palmiers (bee-shaped, buttery, flakey cookies) Price each: 1 kind word

Angel wings (thin, twisty ribbons of fried dough, powdered sugar, and cinnamon) Price each: 1 compliment, 1 kiss

Bumble Gum (balls of sugary gum in a candy pink colour that make heart-shaped bubbles) Price each: 1 peck on the cheek

#welcome home oc #welcome home #nate the bee

[seakicker]

M-maybe pierro with fertility goddess...? Pls hear me out! Since he's from khaen'riah he propably didn't believe in gods too, but after the cataclysm that left his country a ruin and killed his people, pierro found himself to be completely alone for centuries with no one to turn to

He was already old and he felt that the weariness of endless travel was getting the best of him, he wasn't the young warrior anymore that could endure everything that was thrown at him, he knew that if he continued on like this he'd die an honorless death by the hands of cold, some beast or even a bandit

And so he continued onwards until finally strength left him and he collapsed under a strangely green tree, almost heavy with its fruit but he was too weak already to even reach out to it before finally accepting his embarrassing fate

Except that when he woke up there wasn't the endless darkness he expected, there wasn't cries and flames of the abyss, no, there he was laying on something soft and warm, somethijg that was caressing his beard and sickly pale face as he groggily took everything in; he saw a bountiful lush green garden, filled with exotic greenery and animals, the soft glow of multiple candles and floating orbs of light giving the place an eternal glow in the starry night, and pierro finally looked up to see you, the most beautiful girl he ever saw and he quickly realised that the warm soft thing he was laying in was your fluffy warm lap and you were caressing his face with a soft smile on your full lips

Pierro swore that he died and this is afterlife he most certainly didn't deserve but your lovely voice assured him that no, he didn't die but when you found him under one of your shrines, the tree, he was close to it so you, as the goddess of fertility and life took the dying man in and nursed him back to health

I'm sorry for this monster but just the thought of a most revered and loved fertility goddess reader taking in cold, stoic old man pierro and saving him from death and the jester himself warming up to you and your kindness and eventually deciding that if he really was to spend eternity as an immortal there was no better place than with you, the most beautiful softest being, and even he couldn't help but desire you, eventually desperately wanting to father your babies and be the best husband/protector of his new family💕💔

I’M HEARING YOU LOUD AND CLEAR I ADOREEEE THIS OMFG don't apologize for the length of ur asks, i loooove long asks i analyze them like a school textbook fr. oh this is so good...

fem reader, reader is described as busty, curvy, and chubby, breeding, pregnancy, and lactation below! let me know if i missed a warning.

word count: 2.2K

i like to imagine fertility archon as the spitting image of so many things— aside from the obvious, of course. i feel like she just has this certain air about her that encourages comfort and absolves you of all your worries and anxieties, y'know? being around her is like sitting in front of a fireplace or wrapping a blanket around yourself; it's instant comfort and safety and it just feels like... home. you all know the phrase "they feel like home"— that's the kind of vibe i want for fertility archon reader. she just feels like home.

nobody can attest to that fact more than a man who has, quite literally, lost his home— sure, you could make the claim that a man who has no home would consider just about anything a suitable replacement, but it's not like that. it's not about clinging to a semblance of safety and security after wandering aimlessly for so long, it's not about the ol' "taking what you can get" nor is it about beggars not being able to be choosers, and it's not about desperation. amidst all his exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and delirium, there's one thought that stands out clear as day in pierro's mind— that you're home.

that's what he felt the moment he first looked up at you from your lap, and it's what he's felt ever since. to be met with the sight of a sweet, almost... angelic (which is very high praise coming from someone from khaenri'ah, mind you) being looking down at him rather than the sight of destruction, ruin, and war came as a great relief for pierro. better yet, it's like all the pain he previously felt in his weary body has completely vanished... his joints were no longer stiff, his back no longer aching, and his head no longer pounding upon waking up again after passing out. fascinating... did you perhaps administer some first aid while he was out?

no, that doesn't seem right— there'd certainly be a bitter, medicinal taste in his mouth if that were the case, and not just from dehydration following his aimless travels and days spent with very little water available to quench his thirst. nor does he feel the stiffness of any splints supporting his weary joints— it's like he suddenly magically recovered despite being so miserable before.

well. this certainly beats being killed and looted by some common treasure hoarder taking advantage of his weary, sickly state.

most soothing and reassuring of all, however, is not the feeling of a body freed from injury and sickness, it's the hand gently caressing his face paired with the gentle humming filling his ears. a sweet lullaby, he'd imagine— though it's not one he's ever heard before, the sudden sleepiness it stirs in him (yes, despite the fact that he just woke up again) inclines him to believe it's meant to calm racing thoughts and soothe weary bodies.

"it's okay," a voice gently interrupts that humming from before. "get some more rest; i'll still be here when you wake up."

without so much as a "who are you?" mumbled from pierro, he falls asleep once more, your soft, thick thighs serving as his pillow while your deft fingers gently untangle the knots in his long, gray hair and brush softly against his cheeks. he almost seemed to be running a fever when you first found him collapsed under a tree... heatstroke, perhaps? infection? all it took was a gentle wave of your hand to free him from any and all potential diseases— such an act is child's play for the archon of fertility, prosperity, and new life. you took it upon yourself to carefully, carefully slip sips of water past his dry lips as he looked up at you deliriously, clearly on the verge of passing right out... it's a good thing your lap was there to serve as a pillow and your body as a support, otherwise he would have fallen backwards into the trunk of the tree behind him.

his broad, strong build made you hesitant to pity him as one would pity a wounded animal—clearly this man was a seasoned warrior and a veteran fighter, he doesn't need your pity even if he has seem to fallen on hard times— but even then... you couldn't stop your heart from twisting at the way he immediately melted into your lap and surrendered himself to your care. how horrible... how long has he been alone, you wondered? how long without anyone to provide him with care and love? you're thankful you found him before it proved to be too late for this mysterious man.

when pierro comes to (again), he feels even better than the first time he had awoken on your lap. as promised, you didn't move an inch, waiting for him to wake up while you continued to hum to him in his sleep and gently caress his face.

"good morning," you whisper sweetly, giggling slightly. "how do you feel?"

speech comes surprisingly easy— he would have thought that his throat would be too hoarse to speak properly, but he has no issues. "i feel well," pierro replies, glancing up at his mysterious... protector? doctor? caretaker? "and you are...?"

when you tell him your name, he's instantly reminded of all the tales he's heard of teyvat's many archons— and what a relief it would be to anyone to get discovered by the archon of fertility and not any of the rest of them... the majority of them aren't exactly known for being kind, graceful people, but you? the stories putting you as the protagonist depict you as nothing but generous, loving, and doting, providing bountiful harvests for your people, ensuring the health of families and their newborns, and staving off plague and famine with your own divine protection.

hm. it seems khaenri'ah was wrong about gods... or maybe you're the exception that proves the rule; the reason your kindness stands out so fiercely is simply because the rest of the archons just aren't kind themselves.

"—and i'll take care of you until i feel confident that you've recovered fully," you finish your introduction, smiling at him and offering him a piece of fruit from the tree above— the very same fruit he was too weak to reach up and grab at when he first stumbled upon the tree. it was so delicious and rich that it nearly caught him off guard... is this the power of the fertility archon?

days became weeks and weeks became months. sure, you believed he was well enough to venture out on his own again ages ago, but he didn't seem too concerned with leaving— where would he even go? look at where wandering around aimlessly for years on end got him last time... he would have died were it not for you, and now he's in your debt. helping out around the fields and keeping you company was the least he could do... and, if he's being honest with himself (a rarity indeed), he's come to enjoy your company. you tell fascinating stories and sing beautiful tunes he's never heard before, you prepare the most delicious food anyone alive has ever laid a lip to, and you've done so much for him out of the goodness of your heart... what a welcome change from the centuries of isolation and pain.

one thing you've noticed about pierro is that he doesn't seem to be much of a talker. you're not the type to pry into one's past or private life to begin with, but when he stiffens and presses his lips into a thin line whenever you try to ask about how he found himself collapsed and nearly on the verge of death beneath one of your trees, you drop the conversation there. it's better to mind your own business than attempt to tear up the floorboards hiding someone else's pain. all that matters is that he's safe now... and he won't have to experience that overwhelming loneliness again.

however, it seems he's stumbled upon a new conflict. no, this isn't necessarily related to the aforementioned loneliness, but perhaps that's just the point— this new conflict comes as damage control to ensure that he'll never experience that again. somewhere along the line, pierro began to view you a little less as a savior and a little more as... a woman. he knows you're an archon, truly, but to finally be in the company of someone else after so long, and someone as loving and kind as you... well. no man alive would be able to resist developing feelings. the way you sing to yourself as you stir a pot of soup cooking over a fire, the way you bring him a bowl while smiling and encouraging him to enjoy as much as he'd like, the way your hips swish so invitingly as you walk, and the memory of the way you helped him wash up when you first rescued him, too worried about his safety to leave him alone by a body of water... it's no wonder he began to desire you.

how fitting is it, then, that he first makes a move on you one day while you two are taking a walk by the very tree you first found him by? that was decades ago now; time passes so quickly for immortals... what feels like a single year the immortal is surely a century in mortal's time. the intensity of his gaze nearly made you shrink back into yourself, something no other partner you were with prior to pierro has been able to achieve. wordlessly, pierro cornered you back against the tree with a serious, sincere expression on his face— making an archon his lover? how ambitious. well, it's not like he'd be willing to let anyone else have you; in a world as vile and cruel as this one— and he's witnesses his fair share of evil and cruelty— anyone else may just take your kindness for granted. what if you saved a wandering bandit instead and he attempted to hurt you? sure, he wouldn't actually stand a chance against a literal archon, but it's about the principle of someone failing to appreciate your kindness.

and who better to appreciate it than a man who you gave everything to when he had nothing?

you instantly melt against pierro when he steals your lips in a searing kiss, gently-but-firmly pinning your wrists above your head with one of his large hands. your voice sounds just as sweet as a breathless moan of his name than it does while you're singing to him or humming a little tune to yourself— you pant and moan against his lips so invitingly it makes him wish he took you for himself sooner so he could have been hearing those sounds all this time. when he moves to lick hot lines down your neck, you gasp and press yourself harder against him— it's been a long, long time since you've had a lover; you haven't been with anyone since meeting pierro... maybe it's because you found it hard to find the time for external relationships between all the time you spent with pierro, showing him how to tend to the fields and how to prepare food, maybe it's because you didn't need anyone else, maybe it's because you knew deep down he was the perfect lover all along.

who's to say?

his hand loses its grip on your wrists as his mouth continues to travel southwards, his fingers instead finding a use by tugging the front of your dress down to expose your soft, full tits— ripe and luscious like the very fruit hanging just overhead, they fill his palms and then some just perfectly as he nips along your collarbone. even your skin tastes sweet like fresh fruit...

speaking of taste, absolutely nothing could have prepared pierro for the taste that filled his mouth once he closed his lips around one of your nipples. milk, it's milk— and it's the most delicious thing he's ever tasted. he would never say this out of concern of upsetting you, but your milk is even tastier than your cooking... which is absolutely saying a lot. you whimper and moan as he continues to drink and drink and drink from your ample breasts, periodically switching between the two to show both nipples equal amount of attention. he's not even sure why he's so surprised that you lactate— you're the archon of fertility, isn't such a thing to be expected?

the only thing that would further your image as the most beautiful and perfect depiction of fertility in all of teyvat would be the sight of you pregnant, belly round and swollen with a child while your ample, milky breasts rest on your tummy like a shelf. luckily for him, that's exactly what pierro's new plan is... to put his baby in you and finally, finally have a family of his own again. you already gave him a home, so the next logical step is to provide him a few children to help fill up the spare bedrooms, right?

you've already taken such good care of him. allow him to return the favor by taking care of you and the family you two created together.

#this ask is so overdue i sincerely apologize #genshin smut #genshin impact smut #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #fatui smut #fatui x reader #pierro x reader #pierro smut #fem reader #fertility archon reader #juju bakery #pierro x you #pierro x y/n #genshin imagines #genshin impact imagines

[bangtansmauyeondan]

MOONSTRUCK | Part 7 - Unwanted (Text in between images.)

Pairing: Seokjin x Fem Reader | Namjoon x Fem Reader

Genre: F2L, social media au, soulmates au, office au, slow burn, fluff, implied smut, angst, slight crack, and drama. (Inspired by BTS - Moon)

Summary: You don’t know what the world looks like without Seokjin. Growing up in the same neighborhood, a low iron fence separating your family home and his, your lives have always been tangled up with each other. So much so, that after graduating college and securing your respective jobs, you decided to pack everything up and move to the same apartment building in the city— him, sharing a unit with his younger brother and his college bestfriend; you, sharing a unit with your younger brother and his equally chaotic bestfriend. Eternal neighbors thing, right? Or is that all there is to it?

A/N : Things will feel a bit… different. Taglist is open! Let me know if you want to be added! 🌙

PS - 24/7 Heaven Bakery is a nod to @bts-reveries The Most Beautiful Moment in Life series which I love so much. 💜

Taglist: @bts-reveries @tan-dulset @persphonesorchid @joonjoonsmiles @jayhope88 @thatbangtanjagiya @anaceciliaxr @justinetingball @halesandy @yoongleskitten @onemanbandarmi @juju-227592 @ephyra1230 @somelazysundays

••••••••••••

A stark contrast from the sound your every step made on the marble floor outside of your boyfriend’s office, no clacking of heels could be heard as you walked the carpeted floor towards Namjoon’s desk.

“… but the site in Itaewon is already 1200 people stronger than the previous month. They had a solid hiring plan in place at the beginning of December and so far, they’re ranking higher than most of our existing sites.” He’s on a video conference with one of the executives and despite the positive news he just stated, you could nitpick the frustrated lilt to his voice. He lifted a forefinger signaling you to wait without even glancing your way. The person on the other end of the video call said something inaudible to you, considering your distance from Namjoon. “Alright, James. I’m gonna have to review this again, and I’ll get back to you with the conclusion. Give me until tomorrow morning, yeah? I have to jump on another meeting in 15 minutes.” He ended the call before heaving a heavy sigh.

“Everything alright?” you asked as you approached him. Seeing the way he closed his eyes and massaged the bridge of his nose, you couldn’t help but reach out and give his shoulders a light massage.

“These morons don’t know how to read numbers,” he answered curtly, shrugging your hands off in the process. “What are you doing here?”

You were taken aback by how harsh his words were, but considering he’s stressed from work, you let it slide. “I wanted to have lunch with you. You missed our coffee date this morning. Are you not happy to see me?” you pouted playfully before landing a small peck on his lips.

“If you’re hungry, I don’t know, ask Yejin to have lunch with you. Or Hoseok. I have another meeting in about ten minutes and trust me, lunch is the last thing on my mind right now,” he straightened up on his chair and went back to his computer, as if you’re not standing dumbfounded right behind him.

“Well…” unconsciously, you fiddled with the pendant of your necklace, “I can stay and make you tea or coffee if you’re not hungry. I can—“

“Babe… please. I’m quite busy,” he clicked his tongue, obviously displeased.

You’re starting to get irritated and insecure as well, but you tried to ignore it. “You need something to nibble on, babe. The meeting—“

“Yn, what part of ‘I’m busy’ do you not understand?” he tilt his head to the direction of the door and that’s when you lost it.

“Wow. Thank you, Namjoon. I just wanted to see you and have lunch with you, but you’re busy. I understand that. That’s why I wanted to make you something if you’re gonna miss lunch, you know, to keep you focused and alert during your meetings, but yes, you know what? Forget it.”

Namjoon did not have to answer. The way he buried his face in his two hands in frustration told you everything you needed to know— you’re not wanted. Again. A frequent occurrence ever since he got the promotion for the senior manager post and basically had to run a much bigger circus than you do.

If he even took one glance at you when you left and slammed the door right behind you, you have no idea.

“Jin?” you whispered as you crouched down beside his bed, trying to peer into his face that’s partially covered by the alpaca pillow you gave him for his birthday. “Seokjinnie…” you gently brushed his hair back with your fingers, revealing his forehead, and tried to feel his temperature with the back of your hand. Warm to the touch, but not burning. “How are you feeling?”

“Like hell…” he whined, but kept his eyes shut.

“Have you taken your meds? You need to eat something before you could take your meds, Jin,” you continued brushing his hair back to soothe him.

He reached out for your hand on his head and snuggled his cheek against it, not letting go, before he ratted his younger brother out, “Taehyungie fed me cup ramyeon when I asked for lobster chowder. That kid. How dare he trick his older brother like that? I was the one who helped mom change his diapers— I was only 3 back then!” he pouted. “Then he made me take two tablets and said ‘hyung it will help with your fever,’ but I know I don’t have fever. I know it, it’s my body. Scold him for me, Yn.”

You couldn’t help the giggle that escaped your mouth hearing Jin complain about Taehyung— whiny, pouty, sneezy, and maybe the rest of Snow White’s seven dwarfs. “Aww, don’t worry, I’m gonna whack his little bum bum later.”

“Thank you,” how he managed to give you his killer wink despite being woozy, you’ll never know.

“So you’re not sick?”

“Nope,” he replied with a pop on the ‘p.’

“Well then scoot over and give me some room. I want to lie down.” The panic that flashed on Jin’s face and the way his eyes widen told you he knew how much shit he’s talking about. He’s always been in denial whenever he gets ill, simply because he didn’t want to burden anybody.

“No, the bed is too small… and you… uh, you might, um… you might get sick.”

“But you’re not sick, right? COME ON. Scoot over,” you climbed on the bed and wiggled your way beside him. Jin was quick to shove the pillow between the two of you and partially cover his face again.

“Go away, Yn. Why are you even here?” as soon as the words were out of his mouth, he wanted to kick himself, because not only did he see how your expression changed, but it also couldn’t be further from the truth. He wanted you close, in more ways than you could ever imagine.

“I see I’m not wanted here either…” you began to move, but before you knew it, Jin was already encircling his arms around your waist and pulling you close. So close that your back ended up flushed against his chest and you could feel his hot breath at the back of your neck.

“Stay, I’m sorry, I was just messing with you,” he whispered before burying his face in your hair and taking a deep breath.

And for some reason you couldn’t explain, you felt your heart flutter.

#bts smau #kim seokjin #bts ff #bts imagines #bangtansmauyeondan #moonstruck au #jin moonstruck

[keylimeimagines]

Hi !Can i have a male match up for genshin or persona (one you prefer,both,none you choose ! X) ) please ? Physically:

I’m a 5.2 chubby french girl  with long light copper wavy hair I have  brown eyes loke chocolate and glasses,really pale skin with freckles(my pp is me)

Personnality:

I am an INFJ,libra,ravenclaw and I have cat and mom energy if we listen to my 3 older brothers,nephews.I am affectionate,quiet,clumsy.With my loved one I love teasing and cracks jokes but I am also quite  sarcastic,blunt if needed.

Hobby:

I like listening to music,reading,singing,baking,cooking.I am also a smoker.I play a lot of video games and watch anime. I am an INFJ,libra,ravenclaw and I have cat and mom energy if we listen to my 3 older olders brothers and nephew.

Fun fact:

I’m doing an degree in Science education and work as a student job at a bakery.

I am also very spirituaI

I love wearing many jewelry (rings almost at all finger,double necklace)

I never wear my glasses

I live on coffee,tea and energy drink (It's okay for me but not for you take care of yourself ahah)

My signature smell is a mix between coton candy and Black currant

I have many nicknames and it can be confusing for people(Ju,Juju,mum,Rose)

I hope that you’re okay !

CELESIA HAS SPOKEN, AND THE ONE CHOSEN FOR YOU IS....

ARATAKI ITTO [ESFP]!!

chose him bc ESFP x _NFJ supremacy <33

ANYWHO, i feel like Itto would LOVE freckles!! he thinks they look so cool!!

this man is the most Gryffindor you'll ever meet!! and he's PROUD

itto is also very affectionate!! and too confident at times if im honest, but it's okay we love him <3

this man is LOUD and VERY dumb, but it's fine because it perfectly contrasts your quietness

he loves to lightly tease his friends and especially his loved ones, but he'll never take it too far!!

he can't cook for shit, but he loves literally everything you cook or bake (unless it has beans in it obviously)

i can't exactly pinpoint what Itto's smell would be like, but i imagine it to be like mahogany or some type of "wood" smell for some reason

he already gives many nicknames to many things (including but not limited to his onikabuto, the traveler, kujou sara, and many more), so he would NOT hesitate to give you even MORE nicknames that may or may not make any sense whatsoever <33

big dumb oni himbo <33 i lovm him sm!!!!

#i was gonna match you up with ryuji but im not sure if i wanna write for persona rn so i just chose itto!! #arataki itto #itto arataki #arataki itto x you #arataki itto x reader #x reader #f/o imagines #genshin impact #headcanons #vee's headcanons #vee's imagines #f/o #genshin impact x reader #💖love across teyvat💖(matchup series)

[serede986]

Hi! Absolutely loved your Juju and ties post! Can you write Jumin x MC where she works for him and she finds him "lost in the wild" (commoner's neighborhood, I don't know why he can't just call Driver Kim) and she feels in the obligation of looking out for him because he is so clueless and easy to trick? (and she reluctantly falls in love because he is so adorable?) Thanks!

Lost and Confused (Jumin)

Hi nonny san! So glad you liked the HC 🥰This honestly is a very cute request cause clueless and confused Jumin is the cutest thing in the world fjfjjdsofks I mean imagine him being just a little nervous and looking around and playing with the cufflinks and hhhhhhhhhh

Okay enough fangirling fjfdkanfn. Hope you enjoy. Please feel free to ask for a rewrite.

~

Closing the door behind you, you walked down the street towards the bakery with the intention of buying some macarons to treat yourself for the week. While on the way, you spot a very familiar man, eyeing the area with much suspicion in his eyes.

His fingers fidgeted with his sleeves, feet tapping the ground in a pattern of impatience. Is he lost?

"Greetings Mr. Han, never thought I'd see you here.."

"Ahh Ms. MC, glad to see you," his eyes appeared brighter, a subtle frown replaced with small red on his cheeks, a smile that could ever be ignored. The red on his cheeks instantly mirrored on yours, you instantly diverged your vision at anything but his eyes.

"Do you need some assistance, Mr. Han?"

"Oh! Yes, actually I'm searching for the meow cafe, I heard it's quite a famous cafe in the town, although I couldn't locate it's whereabouts anywhere in the area.." looking around he couldn't spot anything else other than apartment complexes and houses.

Oh this poor soul.

The confused innocence reflects beautifully on his face, daylight shimmering through the trees, dancing as the breeze goes by.

There had been a few instances where he had called you into a meeting even when you didn't have any work related to the meeting. You tried not to think much of it, considering it was just a part of your training but, now that I think of it...

"I want you to be beside me.."

"Huh?!" That almost scared you, embarrassed to zone out on him.

He raised his eyebrows before speaking "Aren't you leading the way?"

"S-sure am Mr. Han.." you nodded, smiling sheepishly.

You walked with him to a small cat cafe, tucked behind the plants, beside an alleyway, currently being resided by a black cat, staring at both of you while you entered the cafe. A small 'ding' echoed, signalling your presence. Small meows and chatter surrounded the room.

A ginger cat walked towards the both of you, rubbing herself through your legs.

Jumin proceeded to pick her up, rubbing her head slowly, making her purr almost instantly.

This.. somehow feels like something out of your imagination, something you never imagined him to look like. So soft, and so utterly precious. Something you could never imagine while working together with him. Something you'd be running your mind for, wishing to see that precious every day.

After playing with the cats for a while, you both took a table, tucked in the corner, ordering your beverages on the way.

"There's another cat cafe that I'd like to visit in some other area, would you be interested in visiting it with me, MC?" He looked into your eyes, his demeanor even more confident than before, but somehow holding a soft smile.

You gasped lowly, looking away as your cheeks heated up. There was a certain excitement in your chest, jumping to get out.

"Yes" you muttered low, your fingers fidgeting under the table.

"I hope Saturday afternoon doesn't interfere with your schedule," he said, quickly making your blush return to your cheeks.

Goddamit Jumin, what's with that fucking smile?!

"Ahh ugh! N-no, no it does not. Or rather, I'd be glad to!"

His eyes widened, before settling back into a smile.

Do.. you think of me just as often as I think about you, Mr. Han?

~

(^._.^)ﾉ

I really hope you enjoyed, have a good day!

#mystic messenger #jumin han #mysme jumin #mm jumin #mm jaehee #jumin imagine #cheritz #mm zen #jaehee kang #jumin fanfic #jumi #hyun ryu #mm 707 #mm ray #mysme #jumin fluff #jumin x mc #jumin #mm drabble #jumin dlc #mysme drabble #mysme rika #mm v #mystic messenger yoosung #cat #mm fanfic

[littlemessyjessi]

Mun Joo: In Depth Profile: BTS 8th Member Series “Dreamy”

BTS Eight Member Character Profile: Pastel "Cute" Version

This will go along with imagines, headcanons and fake social media posts.  I have a more punk alt version of this type of thing with a completely different character and story.  Her name is Mae Jae and it is a Jimin pairing story.  But I had someone message me about doing something with a kawaii theme.  So here we go! Btw if you want to read Jae’s story, just scroll to the bottom.  The BTS masterlist is always linked there! There you will find the link for Jae’s mini masterlist! 

---

Name:  Mun Joo

Meaning:  Mun means Moon and Joo means Gem.   So in theory, Gem Moon.

Nicknames:  JooJoo, Juju Bean, Princess, Treasure, Gem, Gemstone, Sometimes Princess Moon Gem , Pipsqueak , Lil Nugget, Tiny, Lil Bit, various other names used to poke fun of her height.

Other nicknames/terms of endearment that are more common for lots of people: Babydoll, Doll, Unnie and also Noona (from a lot of the fans who are younger than her), Dongsaeng (From older fans sometimes when referring to her)

BT21 character:  A little pink piglet named Pipsqueak.

Some statistics:

Age: 27

Date of Birth:  November 14, 1993

Sign: Scorpio

Born in: Seorae Village, Seoul, South Korea Also, known as Korea's Little France, Seorae Village

Height and general body idea: 4'9"-4'11" (Around 124 cm) making her the shortest member of the group .  Joo is a very small person in general.  Quite petite.  She often jokes that she has the figure of a nine year boy.  She is flat as a board. President of the itty bitty titty committee.   She used to be incredibly insecure about it but she came to love her body.   However, she do actually have some booty on that frame of hers.   Most of that comes from the rigorous dance routines that is part of her job.  She got criticized for being so small, in every sense of the word.  The whole 'eat a cheeseburger' thing really caused some major issues for her.  Beauty standards are shit and K Beauty standards, thin is in... but only the right kind of thin.  Same thing goes for when 'thicc is sexy but only when it's the right kind of thicc.'  It's all bullshit honestly.  You're perfect the way you are, no ifs, ands or buts.  

Anyway, moving on.

Hair:  Originally black but it has changed a lot as is common in Kpop. She tends to keep it dark now though as she discovered it is much healthier for it.  She does love the instant satisfaction of a wig though.   Her signature hair style is space buns.  

Eyes: Very dark but she wears colored contacts sometimes which again is common in Kpop . She does have glasses that she wears whenever she's not required to wear contacts for work.   Because Joo is blind as a fucking bat.   Good god.... not even sure she should be allowed to navigate by herself without her glasses. She was given custom glittery ones for Christmas.  She cried. 

Marks/Defining features:  Probably her most defining feature are her lips.  She and Jimin definitely fall into the Bratz Doll lips category.   She also has very chubby cheeks and has been compared to a chipmunk or hamster on more than one occasion.  

Tattoos/Piercings:  Joo doesn't have any tattoos at the moment though she is interested in them and would like one.  She loves piercings though and has stacked ear piercings and a nose piercing.  She went rogue and got a tongue piercing but unfortunately it did blow up in her face when her body rejected it and her tongue swelled.  She had to let that dream die.... for now.  To be fair, her friend had done it and she hadn't actually been to a professional piercer.

There is no face claim for her but rather a collage of inspiration pictures.  Feel free to use your imagination, loves.

Family:

Mother- Mun Ahnjong *Ahnjong means tranquil Her mother owns a a small bakery in Seoul and is a very talented pastry chef.  The bakery is called Batter Up and it has a baseball theme inside because Ahnjong is a massive baseball fan as much as she is one of baking.  There is baseball memorabilia everywhere.  

Sister- Mun Cho-Hee who is two years younger than her. *Cho-Hee means beautiful joy Her sister is a teacher.

Stepfather- Mun Hye *Hye means wisdom He is a carpenter.

*Her mother relocated the girls to Seorae Village not long after Cho-Hee was born. This was after some rather toxic behavior on their birth father's part.  She later met Hye and they married after a while.  Hye also officially adopted the girls.

Languages:   Korean, obviously.   English and French which she learned during her growing up in Seorae Village.   Limited Russian and Arabic just enough for a bit of a song.   This will be explained further down.   Also, broken Japanese which she truthfully only learned from watching countless hours of Japanese anime.  She could probably communicate enough to get her point across but it would be chaotic and terrible.  

Education:

The French School of Seoul where she spent most of all her schooling

College - Global Cyber University

Degrees : Entertainment and Media. Literature and Language.

Voice Claims/Inspirations: She has a nice range but generally has a high, sweet tone to her voice.  Tae's voice is so deep and her's so high.  So it was that whole duality that really created excitement. She does have a nice range though, as does Tae, and so she can produce lower notes and has worked to improve it over the years.

There is no one voice claim but rather a mixture of inspiration.  There will be song titles through this whole series.  Some actual songs that exist.  Other just titles for songs that don't exist.  

Voice Claim Inspirations:

Anne Marie, Ava Max, Ariana Grande, Zara Larsson, Georgia Merry, Meghan Trainor, Amanda Seyfried, Salem Ilese, Sia, Christina Perri

Discovery story:

She auditioned and competed for Korea Sings (a south Korean singing contest).  It was her performance of "Once Upon A December" from the movie Anastasia that really got her noticed.  She played into her strengths by singing it in five different languages: Korean, French, English, Russian and Arabic and played piano.  

* Bang Si-hyuk (Mr. Hitman Bang himself) happened to be watching the program during her performance.  He was very impressed and intrigued and so the company reached out to her to contact her about an audition.

So vaguely similiar in how Jungkook was discovered by audtioning for Superstar K. 

She auditioned when she was fifteen and began the training process while she was still attending school.

She trained for a year with the idea that she would either go solo or be with a girl group but an opportunity became available and she eventually began training along since several others, including those who would later go on to become BTS.  

She debuted as an official member on June 13, 2013 with everyone else.  

There was a lot of criticism in the beginning and truthfully she still deals with her fair share.

There was a lot of talk of her just being the 'token girl' in the group and even for quite a long time accusations of her sleeping with all of them.

Her appearance was also visciously torn apart constantly.  Too small, too thin, not the right kind of thin, got called fat because of her chubby cheeks, not sexy enough, too childlike, the list goes on and on.  

She quickly reached a point where she wanted to quit so many times.   And she almost did when she got attacked once because a crazy saesang accused her of sleeping with Jungkook.    Regardless of the fact, that he was like her brother and also very much underage at this point.   This incident is what sparked the hashtag "Bunnyguard".   It is rare that JK ever leaves her side when they are in public as a group now.  He is like her personal body guard and he will glare into anyone's soul who even gets close to her.  

They're all very protective of her honestly and Yoongi is like the glaring demon just a few paces behind her but truthfully it scared the shit out of Jungkook to think something could've gone wrong so quickly.  So he just sticks by her because it gives him some sense of peace to know that if it did happen again, at least he'd be right there.  

Anyway, moving on.  

Other Musical Credits: 

She has produced some solo content in the form of two albums/mixtapes.

(For the songs that are actual songs I will put it in parenthesis what they are.)

The first one, released in 2015- The "Wanderlust" Album

Album art: 

Tracks include:

⦁ Tiger Lily ft. Kim Taehyung ⦁ Wanderlust ⦁ Crown of Daisies ⦁ Whisper ft. Kim Seokjin ⦁ Like I'm Gonna Lose You (this is the Meghan Trainor / John Legend Song) ft. Jeon Jungkook ⦁ Perfect To Me (by Anne Marie) ⦁ Pretty Girl ( by Maggie Lindemann) ⦁ Beautiful (by Anne Marie) ⦁ Ride Away With Me Ft. J-Hope

Her second solo album was released in 2019- The "Skinship" Album

Album art: 

Tracks Include:

⦁ Skinship ⦁ Sweater Paws ⦁ Pouty Lips ⦁ Hot Chocolate ft. Kim Taehyung ⦁ Let Me ⦁ Just Hold Me ft. Min Yoongi ⦁ Puppy Dog Eyes ft. Park Jimin ⦁ Fish in the Sea ⦁ I Like You So Much, You'll Know It (By Ysabelle Cuevas) ⦁ Death Bed (by Powfu) ft. Kim Namjoon ⦁ Lakeside ft. Kim Seokjin

The first album was more of her introducing her solo content into the world.

There is some happy stuff on there, some self love stuff, some stuff about how it was to be fresh and new into the entertainment industry.   That album was a 'stars in your eyes' kind of album.

The second album, she's older.  She's lived more, experienced more.  She's also had some heartbreak in her life at this point but she's also fallen in love.   There are several songs on there inspired by one person who she's hopeless for but she's terrified to tell him.

Other Singing Credits:

  "Ultraluminary" for the movie Over the Moon (By Phillipa Soo)

  "Beauty and the Beast" for the live action version of the movie ft. Kim Taehyung (By Ariana Grande and John Legend) Both English and Korean version.

*There are also other various writer and producer credits.

Acting Credits: Obviously music video or BTS related project that requires it.

Additionally, more than willing to be an extra for any of the guys solo stuff in music videos.

Most notably is her silent extra role in Yoongi's "Daechwita" where she had a small appearance as a pouty woman in the background trying to smack someone with a piece of bread.  

Voice Acting:

"Zootopia"- Unnamed kitten character singing to herself in the background of a scene between Nick Wilde and Judy Hopps

"Barbie Starlight Adventure" - Characters Sheena and Kareena

"My Little Pony" Series- Spike the dragon's long lost cousin Gemma (just one episode)

"Ever After High"- Kitty Cheshire

Live Action Acting:

Cameo in Disney Descendants as the daughter of the Witch in Hansel and Gretel

Author Credits: 

She has a few books published at this point in her life.  They are somewhat small works but she is quite proud of them all the same.

"Ukiyo" *which means living in the moment, detached from the bothers of life

This is an interactive coloring book.  Each page includes an original drawing from her in black and white so that you can color it as you see fit.  On the opposite page each drawing has a little message along with it.  

This comes from her love *ahem* obsession with coloring books.

"Meraki" *which means to do something with  soul, creativity, or love -- when you put "something of yourself" into what you're doing, whatever it may be

This book is somewhat of a pep talk book.  It features words of wisdom in the form of her favorite quotes, things her family told her as a kid, words from management, inspiring song lyrics and even talks with other members.

"Eunoia" *which means beautiful thinking, a well mind

This book was probably the hardest for her to put out and share with the world because she's very candid in it about her struggles with anxiety and depression.  In this book, she kind of bares all in a lot of ways talking about real life experiences.  However, she also includes things like playlists that put her in a better mood, recipes that make her happy, activities that boost her seratonin, ways that she copes.   It's sort of a : Hey, I know that this stuff kinda sucks but you're not alone.  I feel it too and these are some things that help me.  So I hope they help you do.   Which is exactly what she said when she was interviewed about it.

"Quaintrelle" *which means a woman who emphasizes a life of passion expressed through personal style, leisurely pastimes, charm, and cultivation of life's pleasures

This is a book cowritten with her mother and sister.  Each of them has a chapter in the book under the title of their name.   It includes what that word means to them and how they try to live their life by it.

She is extremely proud of the book and cries whenever someone asks her about it, lol.

"Panda and Piglet" This is a children's book about a mother pig who moves her two piglets to a new village after they've been through something awful and they meet their neighbor, Mr. Panda.

It's a love story about how Mr. Panda and Mama Pig fall in love but it is told through the eyes of the little piglet named Diamond.

It's less of a story between Mama Pig and Mr. Panda and more about how Mr. Panda steps into the lives of the three of them and becomes someone they can trust and depend on.   It shows him comforting Diamond and showing her how to do things like a father would and eventually in the story we see how Mr. Panda asks Mama Pig to be his wife.  But also how he 'proposes' to Diamond and her baby sister, Quartz, by asking them if they would accept him into their family.  

It's a family story, a father daughter story.  A story about chosen love which honestly is some of the best kind.

It features Joo's original artwork which is quite colorful and kawaii with heavy focus on exaggerated jewels and gems through out the story as a nod to her name.

Joo gave him the first draft on father's day and it was published on his birthday.

She tries to read it at children's libraries when she can... but she inevitably cries every time.  She's very emotional about it, lol.

The book did very well and has sold many copies.  It now has it's own set of plushies to go along with the characters.  Joo donates a bunch of copies to the school her sister works at every year and signs them all.  

Some of Joo's likes and Dislikes:

Likes:

- She is addicted to strawberry milk.  While Kookie has banana milk, she has strawberry.  It's a thing that fans love to comment amount.   There are often posts of strawberry and banana items together with the hashtag #jookie #strawnana #gemkook

- She has a major sweet tooth.  Loves anything sweet.  She's not excessively picky anyway. She'll eat just about anything. Unless it's brussel sprouts.  She'd rather die.   But she loves sweets.

There are many fan videos along the lines of.

"Mun Joo's sweet tooth for her Kookie"

"Mun Joo's sweet tooth for her Suga"

She can not be trusted to do the grocery shopping alone.  She will only buy snacks.  

-  She has a very kawaii aesthetic.  She loves anything pastel and cute. And loves a good sparkly moment.    She also feels the compulsive need to coo at anything that is even remotely adorable.  Hence why she does it to Yoongi and he gives her a death stare before he eventually cracks because he's soft for her. (like he is for all for them truthfully)   Jimin, however, loves it.

-She loves craft stuff.  Anything that she can make cute and glittery.  Definitely keeps a scrapbook. Likes to make keychains with pictures and glitter in them. - She loves video games and will play for hours on end if left unchecked.   She has the sweetest most dreamy pastel gaming set up and gets scolded often for buying cute gaming stuff when what she has is perfectly fine

-  She loves shopping.  It doesn't matter what it is, as long as it's cute.  It can be the Dollar Tree or it can be Gucci.  Tae is usually her favorite shopping buddy because they make a day out of it.  She also feels very safe with Tae and knows she won't be bothered or hit on when he is with her because the two of them are so cuddly and always have been.  And also, let's be real while TaeTae is a precious puppy,  Kim Taehyung can be intimidating as fuck.  

-  She is extremely forgetful.  Even to the point of forgetting that she put it in her notes on her phone.  She is definitely part of the Planner Group.  She is someone who needs to write it down.  If she doesn't, it might as well have went in one ear and out the other.  Forgets that her glasses are on her head or her pen is stuck in her space bun.   Calls a member to ask if they've seen her phone... while she's literally using it to call them.  House keys are a joke.  

- She is very cold natured and also absolutely hates being this way.   She usually has something fluffy and cozy near her at all times to keep her warm.  Whether this is a hoodie, or a faux fur blanket or a Jimin to hold her when she's freezing to death. - She loves hygiene, beauty and skincare to a point that it's almost a little concerning.   She likes makeup and nails too but she often feels like she ruins it before she can even really enjoy it. Still has a drawer full of lip gloss and lip balm and way too many highlighters to even be considered healthy.   Gets it on everything.  Not sorry about it at all. -Only paints her nails either silver, gold or a glittery white because she claims that it goes with everything.  Same for toes, lol. In reality, it's just b/c she likes how it sparkles. - she loves arcade games and if not supervised she will spend an unspeakable about of time playing with the claw machine because 'Just a little longer, Hobi.   I need that little octopus.  He needs to come home with me."

- She is very affectionate.  Skinship is a big thing with her.  She's a cuddle person.  Touch is very much her love language. - She does have tiny feet and hands just due to her being very small in general.  She used to hate this when she was a teenager because no one took her seriously.  But then she discovered that she could buy name brand shoes in the kid sizes for half price and it was a game changer. - She likes fitness but hates the gym.  Jungkook tries to get her to go with him and she will but only for him.  She'd much prefer to roller skate or something like that.   - She loves vintage pastel books.  It's one of her favorite activities to hunt down hidden treasures. She loves the idea of being able to pass them on to someone in the future.  Whether that's a child of her own, a neice/nephew or a friend's child, that part isn't relevant. - She loves plushies and she has a collection.  It's honestly a problem.   "But hyung, I need it.  Look at her all alone on that shelf.  We can't just leave her, Yoongi. That's nonsense.  Cruel nonsense and you should be ashamed for ever even thinking of abandoning her.  For shame." - She loves collecting magical girl items.  Big sailor moon fan - Also loves Jigglypuff. If she sees something Jigglypuff, she can't let it go. "You have that one in your room." "No I dont! This one is different!" "It's literally exactly the same." "How dare you, Jungkook?! How dare you!" -She's also very much into Care Bears, Strawberry Shortcake, Hello Kitty and My Little Pony.  Basically, she just loves cute stuff. - She's not great at cooking but she's a decent baker.  Give credit to her Mama for that.   She doesn't get to see her family a lot just due to her job but she absolute adores being able to bake cookies with her mother when she can.  Sometimes they do it over video call when she's really missing her -Is actually a really good pitcher (baseball)with a strong, fast pitch.   Her mother loves baseball.  There's no way she didn't have some type of skill in that area.  She played softball as a kid but it was never really her thing so she quit by the time she was a teenager. -Jimin's pinky.  There are many comp videos that literally just consist of her grabbing his hand and sticking it in her pocket. - really loves the Disney character Stich from Lilo and Stitch.  Can do the Stitch voice and that's how her and her adoptive father say I love you to one another - it makes her cry

Dislikes:

- she hates brussel sprouts . She thinks it was grown in the gardens of hell. - she strongly dislikes boring ways to work out.   She tells Jungkook that the treadmill was created to make her cry - She hates crying but she can't help it because she's sensitive - is actually a crybaby - Won't tolerate anyone being a bully.  She just about loses her mind. -especially if someone says something rude to one of the guys - tiny dragon on the loose - She's not a huge fan of heights as she claims she was made this close to the ground for a reason.  She has a love/hate relationship rollercoasters because of this. - When Hobi won't share her lollipop with her, lol.   "Oh, you can't share with me now? Do I have cooties, Hoseok? Am I not good enough for you?" "I am not licking that." "Joonie, Hobi doesn't love me!" "Not enough to share a sucker with you. You and Jimin are so weird!" - So offended -When Jin won't let her touch his feeiiissss "Not my face." "But Jinnie..." "Quit whining and listen to your hyung." "I'm telling Namjoonie." -Secretly Jin loves when she touches his face and holds his jaw, stroking her thumbs over his cheeks *he's weak for her* But he teases her anyway because he thinks it's cute when she pouts. All chubby cheeks and pouts and furrowed eyebrows over angry little eyes. Like a tiny adorably angry hamster or something. - When Yoongi won't let her cuddle him "Come on, Lil Meow Meow" "Get out." "Yoongi!" "I'm gonna throw something at you." "You would never!" *throws a pillow at her but it never even connects* "Jin!!!" Literally, five seconds later you will find him with his arm around her because he can't actually deny her anything for very long. - When Taehyung won't let her get up to pee when they fall asleep at night "Tae, I have to pee. Let go." *Tae snuggles deeper, crushing her into the mattress.* "Tae, I'm gonna pee all over you." "Do it." "Ewwwwww!!!!!!!" - When Namjoon scolds her, which to be fair, isn't often.   "I'm sorry, Joonie.." *cue long suffering sigh from Namjoon before he pulls her into his arms and holds the sensitive little bean. - She's older than him but Joo is honestly like Joon's tiny baby sister.   - when Jimin ignores her as a prank You would think she was dying. She tries to give it back to him but she cracks and clings to his leg. Cue Jimin trying to walk around with her stuck to his leg like a koala bear. "I'm sorry, Jiminie.  I don't know what I did but I'm sorry.  Please love me again." - he cracks because he can't continue when she's looking like that -When Jungkook pushes himself too hard and then refuses to let her baby him "Get off. I'm fine." "Listen to your noona." "Well my noona is almost a foot shorter than me so kinda hard to take you seriously." "I have never been more offended in my life and just for that, you will watch Sailor Moon with me for rest of the night and let me put butterfly clips in your hair." "No the fuck -" "Yoongi!!! Jungkook is being mean to me and he said he doesn't love me anymore!" "You are such a fucking brat." - Yoongi acts tough but he'll murder anyone who upsets her.  He will also glare at anyone else until they do what she wants. *she kinda spoiled AF - this is a double edged sword when it comes down to Joo and Koo because we all know how soft Yoongi is for Kookie.   So he's like having an internal panic attack and they're both looking at him with puppy eyes.  Finally, he just makes them hug it out because there's no way he's choosing.  Fuck. that.   - she doesn't like cigarettes but she has tried vaping because she heard the nicotine could help with the nerves. -however she liked the lecture she got from Namjoon even less so she just let it go and found other ways of dealing with it. - she absolutely hates how low her alcohol tolerance is. One or two drinks and she's fucked to the point that she can't even enjoy herself.  She just orders sugary non alcoholic drinks with Tae now and enjoys watching everyone else turn into fools while she rides her sugar high -and also the evil bliss that comes the next morning when she has no hangover and everyone else (except Tae) is miserable

Ships and Relationships with the Members:

Jin Shipnames: Seokjoo, Seokgem, JinJoo

Ok, so it's kinda half and half with the fandom.  Part of the time, they're shipped as a bro/sis bond.  The other is very romantic.

She can annoy the ever living hell out of him sometimes but he'd do anything for her.   He lets her get away with a lot more than most.   He definitely gives her piggy back rides.

Fan videos are usually along the lines of.

"Jin giving Joo piggy back rides for 8 minutes straight."

"Jin feeding tiny chubby hamster for 10 minutes."

Sidenote: Joo ends up crashing EatJin a lot because she can smell the food and Jin can't tell her and her cute hamster cheeks no.  Also, he loves the way she eats, so there's that.

"Princess Joo convincing her Jin-hyung to let her do anything."

However, that percent of people who ship them romantically usually fall into the Daddy Dom category.   Joo saw a video once and she was tramautized by the edit.

It wasn't that she was upset by the pairing because , ahem, not so much of a secret that Joo literally thinks Jin is Prince Charming and she'd jump at the chance to be with him.

It was just the shocking way the video was edited.  It was raunchy as hell and she wasn't expecting it.

The video was something like "Daddy  Jin and Babygirl Joo moments 18+ edition"

She never expected that to be what it was.  

She had never felt so assaulted by videos of Jin's hip thrusts before in her life.

She had some mixed feelings about it to be honest and didn't touch her computer for like three days after that.

Yoongi Ship names: Joongi, SugaGem, MinMun This is kind of half and half as far as what the fans ship.   Some of them seems to really play into this whole opposites attract thing.  Tsundere like if you will for Yoongi.  

The other half is just the fandom being like:

"Baby Joo running to Yoongi every time she's scared"

Which is accurate.  If something frightens her, the first response she has is to locate Yoongi and cling to him.  

"SugaGem: A collection of Yoongi unable to say no to his hyperactive piglet"

"Sugar being soft for JuJu Bean for fifteen minutes straight"

It's honestly precious.

JHope: Ship Names: JooHope, Jooseok, GemHope

Again, this is kind of half and half.  

One the one hand, you have fans who are hardcore, 'JooHope is real and if you don't believe it, you're stupid'

Many a compiliation video of Hobi's hip thrusts and Joo's iconic shocked face when she gets surprised.

And then the other half is just so soft.  

Videos like:

"Hobi and Joo being sunshine babies for 6 minutes"

"Joo dying over Hobi for 9 minutes"

"GemHope Moments that make you want to cry from happiness"

"JooHope pamper  legends appreciation"

"Jooseok: A compiliation of Joo and Hobi skateboarding and rollerskating for 12 minutes"

"GemHope making friendship bracelets in tiny"

It's honestly very wholesome and the fandom is extremely well fed.

Namjoon Ship Names:  NamJoo, NamGem, RGem, Gemjoon, Joojoon, RMGEM

This is like 3/4 romantic with like a fourth being platonic family for most of the fandom.

The part that views them as family is honestly so sweet.  

Videos like:

"Namjoon looking after Baby Joo"

"RM looking at Baby Gem when she's not looking"

"NamGem sibling goals"

But the other half of the fandom.  Or should I say 3/4 actually.  Namjesus, get the hobi water.

Because while part of them are soft with their-

"NamJoo being the sweetest couple ever for four minutes"

"RM protecting his little lady at all costs"

"Joo giving Namjoon heart eyes for eight minutes straight"

... the other half of them... good god.

For example:

"NamGem: Joon's deep rap and Joo's whistle notes... we see you NamGem."

"RGem: RGem having sexual tension for 7 minutes straight"

"RMGEM: Gemjoon making everyone else uncomfortable with their chemistry for 10 minutes"

It's editing though because there is nothing there but love, friendship and a brother sister bond between Joon and Joo.

Joo does stare at Joon with stars in her eyes but it's because she really looks up to him and is wildly fascinated at how elegantly he handles things all the time when she knows first hand how stressful their life is.

Also, sidenote... Joo is actually a little and Joon is very much a Daddy.  And while it's not romantic between them, just him being around does put her at ease.  He's very good with her like that.  He's also the only one who knows this about her and is very understanding about the whole thing.  Yoongi knows but he hasn't told her.  Jimin feels like he knows but again, he won't tell her because he feels like it'll upset her.  Tae gets a vibe but he's not totally sure if it's anything or if that's just Joo.

Taehyung: Ship Names:  TaeJoo, Joohyung, TaeGem, DualityDuo

This ship is mostly platonic/family/BFF because it's always been very obvious that that was all that it was.

There is a small portion of the fandom that secretly wants them to date because they are so close, they cuddle all the time.

It's also a cute pairing with Tae being all tall and lanky and deep voice and Joo being little and cuddly and high voice.  It's a juxtaposition and it's cute.

But most of the fandom really ships them as the hyper besties.

Videos like:

"TaeJoo being hyper AF for six minutes"

"TaeGem being cuties"

"TaeJoo cuddling for 9 minutes"

"TaeGem going shopping"

It's honestly very sweet.  Very wholesome and pretty cute.

Jimin Ship Names:  Gemmin, Joomin, JimGem

Ok, so a lot of the fandom ships these two together to be honest.

There was this whole Tiny King and Queen vibe going around for a while but it eventually tapered off because it became apparent that it was making Jimin feel self conscious about his height.

However, Joo is quite tiny, tiny hands, tiny feet, shit, she's just a smol little person.

And there are so many videos like:

"Gemmin being the most iconic adorable little couple in the world for five minutes straight"

"JimGem being our tiny, precious babies in love for 9 minutes"

"Joomin being clingy AF with each other for 3 minutes"

But then... get the hobi water again.

There are saucy edits where you see the different sides of each of them.

There are a lot 'sexual chemistry' videos and that kind of thing.  

But honestly, again, it couldn't be more platonic.   There was a brief period in the beginning where Jimin did have a crush on her but she brother zoned him hard.  

That wasn't unique to him though.  They all got brother zoned.  She acknowledges that they're all very handsome fellas but that they are family.  Like brothers.  Well, except for Jin.  Joo was just doing her best not to hyperventilate around him because jesus christ, how could someone be that cute?

And there was a huge stir when there was that whole talk about Jimin's ideal type would be someone smaller than him and very into the whole pastel aesthetic.   Joo just happened to fit that bill and people went wild.  But it's very much not like that.  

Jungkook:   Jookie, JooKook, Jungjoo, Gemkook, JungGem, Joo and Koo

So this can go a couple of ways.  Even though Joo is actually among the oldest members in the group after Jin and Yoongi, she is often linked with the maknaes.   This is no doubt just due to her small stature and youthful appearance, only enhanced by her love of pastels and anything cute.  

There are a lot of things like:

"Baby Bunny and Baby Piglet being cute."

"Hyungs unable to say no to Kookie and JuJu Bean for six minutes straight"

"Jookie squabbling like children for 7 minutes"

But it's mostly stuff like:

"GemKook endlessly snacking"

"JungGem stealing each other's food"

"Hyungs spoiling Gemkook for 10 minutes"

It's honestly pretty sweet most of the time.

As well as the crack head videos like:

"Jookie: Milk Friends: A Strawnana Saga"

"Jookie: Baby Piglet and Baby Bunny being competitive over a bowl of noodles"

"Jookie: Joo and Koo chasing each other around stage"

"Jookie: Joo's flying hugs to Jungkook"

#jookie is the hashtag often used for when they are being absolute crackheads.

This crackhead energy was only made worse by the fact that for the longest time those two were roomates. So imagine that chaos. They still try and room together if the members are supposed to be paired up for whatever reason.  They usually get separated, lol. And also sneak back to one another. 

Which, to be fair, is quite often.  

-

Now, this is not to say at all that their relationships with each other have always been perfect.   Because they haven't. They still aren't.  Shit, they're human and people have arguments and disaggreements.  

That's normal.

But that's just a brief glimpse into it and also an in depth profile for Joo.

I'm very excited to release this series!

I already have one for Mae Jae in the Untamed series but Joo and Jae couldn't be more different, lol.  Also... I'm exciting for the new pairing! Yas!

-

Hey loves! 

 I love you and I would love to know your thoughts, my loves!

If you’re interested in any of my other BTS works you can find the masterlist HERE

Love,

Mama Kennysaurus

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——- Also, just a reminder that I am open for commissions! Additionally, the only tag list I have is my permanent tag list but if you ever want to be added all you have to do is just go to the ask box and request to be added! It’s that simple and you’re in! I love you all!

#bts #bts 8th member #bts 8th member ff #bts 8th member imagine #bts 8th member series #bts 8th member series dreamy #dreamy series #mun joo #kim seokjin #kim seokjin x mun joo

[bvckleydiaz]

400 Follower Celebration 🍾

I’m finally getting around to do this post (hold for the applause 👏🏼 ) I’m currently at 423 ha. I’ve been trying to figure out what to say and what to post about this.. I mean it’s taken me almost a week to finish it. That being said, I think I’m going to take a page out of @burzekbrettsey’s book and share some of my favorite blogs who’ve helped me get to where I am and ones that you should be following too!

@kelly-severide: Nikki! Oh my sweet sunshine. I could go on and on for hours talking about her. You are the definition of a soulmate best friend. She’s been such a supportive person from the very beginning. She doesn’t believe it, but she’s an artist is every aspect of the word. The content she makes continues to blow me away every time something new gets put out. She’s legit one of my favorite people on this planet. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I love you🧡

@loveyourownsmiilee: Juju! Oh lord where do i even start. I swear you are my other half. She has the “oliver sense” that comes into play whenever Oliver posts something and deletes it. I mean she snatches those ig stories like it’s her job! We constantly talk about Oli and Ryan. Those are our boys and no one can say any different. She has one of the most positive blogs out there! She has such a bright, beautiful, and kind soul. I’m so glad we found each other 🤍

@burzekbrettsey: Sky! My bestie. We haven’t known each other for long, but I feel like it’s been ages! You are my favorite person to freak out with over Jay Halstead and his thigh holster. I mean that’s such a beautiful sight! Secondly, you are an AMAZING baker!! Have y’all seen the things she can make?!! When she opens her own bakery later in life I’m going to be her number one supporter! I have a feeling it’s always going to be you, nikki and I against the world. Forever homies 🧁

@matan4il: Alice! First off, if you aren’t following her, you are MISSING OUT! Her stories are everything! Since day one I’ve called her the smut queen and she has never disappointed. Her friendship is something I cherish so much in life. She’s the absolute sweetest. If I’m ever having a bad day, she somehow knows it, and helps talk me through it. I’m so grateful for you! ❤️

@fernnette: Fern! We go WAY back! You’ve seen me at my worst (aka the twitter fandom) and yet you still wanna be friends with me.. I don’t know why, but I’m grateful! I can’t even put into words how awesome you are. I’m so glad you made the discord when you did. I feel we’ve grown closer and we’ve made some amazing friends out of it. You are SUCH A TALENTED WRITER. I’m forever stuck on you and your writings. legit the first thing that comes to my mind when i think of you is #horny-jail. Also, as I’m typing this up you are in the discord writing your ass off and it’s v inspirational. like i wanna hop on over and write some. i can’t wait to see what’s coming up next from you 💛

@kenroczen: Jamie! My twin. Eddie Diaz simps unite! Although we get sad when we get someone new in the discord and we lose them to the evan buckley simps, Im glad we got each other! I love being able to talk all things ryan and eddie with you. Oh and don’t even get me started on the big bird gif! I die of laughter every single time someone is talking eddie/ryan with me and you come in out of nowhere. You are the best! ❣️

@doctornineandthreequarters: Jaime! My GGG buddy!! I never would’ve thought I’d bond with someone over buddie and that lead me to bonding over Guy’s Grocery Games. You’re writings are phenomenal! I don’t know how you do it, but you get those fics out so easily. You put so much into your fics and it shows! You’re such a talent! 🖤

@ineedapuppyandsomevodka: Mikayla! I truly didn’t think I’d ever find someone else who has the same inappropriate mindset like me, but here you are! You are relatable in every aspect. Your writings are some of my absolute favorite! Even the same drabbles have me weak. You’re so supportive of me in the discords and I hope I’m at least half as helpful as you are. I’m super grateful for you 💙

@buddie-buddie: Ella! First off, if you don’t know Ella, she’s the mastermind behind the White House AU universe!! She’s BRILLIANT! Whenever I see you in my notifications I can’t believe it. I’m sorry but this amazing writer and human being is in my notifs?!! What even? I know we’ve only become mutuals recently, but I’ve been following your writings since the beginning. I can’t tell you how excited I get when I see an email saying you updated. You are the absolute best! I hope we get to know each other more in the future! 💗

@sneetchestoo: You are so freaking supportive! I can always count on you to be in my notifications. You give me opinions, advice, and help me through hard time. You’re such a sweetheart 💚

@woodchoc-magnum: Felicity! We don’t get to interact very often, but let me tell you when you followed me?!! OH MY LORD I WENT OFF THE WALL. You are in my top 3 favorite writers of all time. You are such a glorious writer. Like all props to you my love! I swear I fangirl a tad bit whenever I see you in my notifs. Thank you for sharing your talents with us 🤎

and the honorable mentions: there’s so many others that I’m grateful for. I say it often, but i don’t know how I have this many followers! Thank you all for being so kind and supporting this, all over the place, blog 💝

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[killalluchihas]

good vibes/bad juju - 36

While on a mission overseas, Gojo gets K-O’d by an unknown person. Within a week, every sorcerer in Japan has heard about it. (A JJK OC story - Rated M)

[Chapter One] [Ao3 link] [Previous] [Next]

—/—/—/—

chapter thirty-six: love and hate, give and take It's a metaphor, Gojo. FFS.

A/N: For this chapter, we're back in gossip-central, Queens, so assume that all the dialogue is spoken in English.

“Pick whatever you want,” Gojo grumbles, resting against the display case of pastries. “I’m getting a cinnamon bun. And a coffee with three pumps of vanilla syrup,” he adds to the shop worker.

“You’re paying for me?” Wendy narrows her eyes in suspicion.

“Yes,” Gojo rolls his eyes. “Make sure you get a receipt for the tax write-off.”

“What tax write-off?” she frowns, puzzled.

“Feeding the poor,” he clarifies with a cheeky grin. “This counts as a charitable donation, doesn’t it?”

Her jaw drops, and Gojo laughs at the affronted look on her face.

“You’re such a dick,” Wendy hisses to him, and then she turns back to the shop worker to order a few items from the display case in the most unnaturally sweet voice Gojo has ever heard.

“I’m like this to everyone,” Gojo points out once she’s done ordering. He can see clearly over the bakery counter; the shop worker is adding an extra cookie to Wendy’s order. And a phone number, scrawled on the bag. “But you’re fake. You’re only nice when it benefits you,” he notes, amused.

Wendy scoffs. “Oh, so should I be nice to everyone, even jerks like you?”

“No,” he chuckles. “Be a jerk to everyone. Be real.” He nods absently to the cashier, swiping his card without checking the total.

“But then,” Wendy argues as they leave the store, “I won’t get free cookies.” She holds up her prize. “Of course I’m nice when it benefits me. I put in effort when it matters. Don’t you like it when people are nice to you?”

“Only if they mean it.” He shrugs, thinking fondly of the blue-haired student from Kyoto that asked for a selfie with him. Miwa is genuinely a nice person, and he likes that. “I prefer honesty over politeness,” Gojo concludes.

This time it’s Wendy that’s laughing. “You’re full of crap!” She scoops up her order and smiles at the bakery workers before leaving. “If I were completely honest to every person I ever met, I’d get nowhere and have no one.” She snaps her fingers and points to Gojo. “Like you!”

He laughs in disbelief. “Me? Where’d you get the idea I’m some loser?”

“Because you are,” she says, earnest as ever. Gojo cannot believe the nerve of this tiny woman.

The problem is that they both know that Gojo would never hurt her—and Wendy isn’t the least bit intimidated by someone who can’t follow through. Maybe her silly magic earrings have something to do with it too. The way she saw right through Itadori, the instant trust she put in Nanami; her reliance on Yoshi’s talisman earrings is something he’s never seen before. Everything about Yoshi and Wendy is so unprecedented. And it makes Yoshi unbearably fascinating, but Wendy? She’s just… some girl with earrings.

Wendy continues blithely, completely unconcerned. “You’re so strong, Gojo, but you’re hated. Curse-users, other sorcerers, your council… no one gives you free cookies, do they?” she teases.

Gojo tilts his head, considering it. There is some truth to that point. Among jujutsu sorcerers, he isn’t well-loved by many. Even fewer that could hold their own and liked Gojo. He only knows a handful of people he trusts implicitly, and even then, he pisses off Nanami and Yaga on a regular basis.

He is hated and feared more than he is loved and respected. But that’s nothing new.

“You’re forgetting something, though,” Gojo replies, looming over Wendy. “You’re a useless little non-sorcerer, and I’m still the strongest sorcerer in the world.” Before Wendy can so much as blink, Gojo snatches her free cookie away and crams the whole thing into his mouth.

“Hey!” She gasps, face flushing with surprise and anger.

Speaking through chocolate chips, he says to her, “I can jus’ take th’ cookies, swee’heart.”

—/—/—/—

“So, whaddya wanna ask me?” Wendy prompts, sipping idly on the slushied remains of her iced latte. “Something about Yoshi, I’m sure. Unless this is a real date. You’re not my type, unfortunately.”

Gojo slouches forward on the table. They’ve relocated to a smaller park near the bakery, and now the two of them are sitting across from each other at a table bolted into the cement. All the food has been eaten, the drinks finished, the napkins used and crumpled between them.

“I have a bunch of questions,” he says honestly, ignoring her jokes. “But I don’t know where to start. I’m so confused about Mariko.”

Wendy nods, humming in vague amusement. “Yeah, you’re kind of clueless.”

“What happened to faking niceties for free food?” Gojo wags a finger at her. “He's out of your league, by the way. I’m gonna write down a list of your red flags for Nanamin.”

“Try it,” Wendy dares him with a toothy grin. “I’m no expert on you and Nanami, but I think that if you hate me, it’ll only make him like me more.”

It’s a lovely, sunny morning in Queens. Wendy’s hair shines like liquid copper, and her pink shirt is tight and low-cut enough to give him a tease anytime she leans forward. And yet, the longer Gojo talks to Wendy, the less cute she gets.

“You have some gunk between your teeth,” Gojo lies.

“Huh?” Her mouth instinctively closes, smile vanishing. Then Gojo gives it away by snorting and Wendy rolls her eyes. “You’re mad ‘cause I’m right!” she exclaims, petulant.

“Shh, I’m thinking,” he waves a hand at her, stretching back against his chair. There’s plenty of mysteries to unravel. Gojo wants to know about the deal with Junpei, but he would rather hear it from Yoshi… even if she’s impossible to talk to without getting wildly off-track, it’s more fun than talking to Wendy…

Wendy sucks loudly on her drink and then smacks it down on the table. “You took too long! Let’s talk about the future." She rests her elbows on the table and laces her fingers together, staring him down like a businessman in a one-on-one meeting. "Where do you see yourself in five years?”

Gojo smiles benignly. “I’m the one that’s supposed to ask questions.”

“Then ask! I already thought of another one: what’s your relationship like with your father?” Wendy probes.

“Perfect. He’s dead,” Gojo indulges her this time, since it’s an easy question. “What about Yoshi’s dad?”

“He died when we were seven,” she replies nonchalantly. “Yoshi can’t remember him.”

His grin fades. “Can’t?” he repeats.

“You already know why. Next question,” Wendy says, resting her head on one hand and gazing at him coolly.

Gojo rolls his eyes. “Way to kill the mood. How did he die?” Hopefully it wasn't a sorcerer-related incident, though that would explain some of Yoshi's hatred of jujutsu...

“Complications from cancer," Wendy says dismissively. "My turn. If you were a worm what would you do?”

“I—” He hesitates, wondering if he misheard her. They’re speaking in English, so it’s possible. “A worm? Like a little—?” He wiggles his index finger to mimic an earthworm.

“Yes. Eh, mimizu, right? That kind.” Wendy confirms, not batting an eye.

“You’re so fucking weird,” Gojo laughs. “Alright, I need context. Was I born a worm, or was I turned into one? Do I have a worm-mind now?” he asks eagerly.

Wendy grins back. “Turned into one. It’s permanent. You keep your mind.”

“Oh, that’s terrible,” he pouts. He sure hopes Yoshi doesn’t have a talisman that would turn him into a worm. “Do I still have Limitless and the Six Eyes, at least?”

“How is that relevant? You’re a worm now.”

“Of course it matters!” he insists. “If you want me to answer, I need all the context.”

“Fine! You can’t use sorcery as a worm.”

He sighs loudly, dissatisfied by this scenario. It would’ve been cool if he could still terrorize the jujutsu council in worm-form. “Boooring! If I don’t have that, I’m basically dead. The world would be thrown out of balance. It’d be total chaos, people would die, so on and so forth.”

Wendy scoffs. “Excuse me, I didn’t ask what the world would do, I asked what you would do as a worm. Answer the question!”

“It’s a stupid question!” he argues. “If I’m a worm, and I can’t change it, I’d be super fucking bored all the time. I’d—wiggle my way up to the surface and let a bird eat me,” he decides, swiping a hand over his throat firmly. "End the mundanity."

This does not mollify Wendy in the slightest.

“WHAT? You’d kill yourself?!” she demands, horrified. “What the fuck, man?”

Her sudden vehemence takes him off-guard. “What else would I do?!” Gojo says defensively. “I’m a worm! That sucks!"

“You got turned into a worm and suddenly you just give up on life? What would your students say, huh?!” Wendy gestures wildly as she says this, more upset by the minute.

Gojo glares at her with genuine bafflement. “You were just telling me how everyone hates me, you know.” Though to be fair, he hadn’t thought about his students in this scenario. “Make up your mind, lady.”

“That’s different!” Wendy whines. “You’re not supposed to die, you’re just a worm!”

“I don’t want to be a worm!”

“That’s not the same as not wanting to live!” she exclaims. “That’s so sad!”

“But what would I do as a worm?!” he asks, frazzled by how frazzled Wendy looks. “Worms are useless!”

“Worms are useful! They fertilize and aerate soil!” she says immediately. Like she’s rehearsed this argument in order to trap him. “They’re a crucial part of the cycle of life and the food chain!”

“Gojo Satoru is also crucial to the world! As a sorcerer!” He points to himself emphatically, not knowing what else to do.

“That’s a little subjective!”

Gojo actually gets to his feet, he’s so shocked. “HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT?!”

“Don’t yell at me!” she wails.

“You started it!” he exclaims, too worked up to sit back down. “I don’t like this question!”

“You don’t have a choice! You’re a worm!”

“I’m not!”

For a lack of a better idea, Gojo snatches up all of Wendy’s extra napkins and paces away to the nearest trash can. She’s so passionate about all this, he couldn’t help but get roped into her argument and match that energy. Gojo can’t remember the last time someone’s gotten him to yell like that, and over something so inconsequential. A worm! Why would she ask me about being a freaking earthworm of all things?

When he’s not looking at Wendy’s pissed-off face, it’s easier to think. And when he thinks about it logically instead of taking her so literally, there’s a chance he may have misunderstood the question.

Maybe she’s not actually talking about worms...

Gojo drops back into his seat and crosses his arms over his chest. Wendy pouts. “I was still using the napkins. And you left the trash behind!”

“Yeah,” Gojo agrees. “I’m an asshole like that.”

She hums a low tone, in both agreement and disappointment.

“I would spell out the word ‘help’ in my slime and hope one of my friends picked me up,” he says after a moment, thinking of how the various people in his life would react to a Gojo-worm. “And if I made it that far without getting squashed, I’d say I'm very fortunate. I don’t have a plan after that.”

With a soft, smug smile, Wendy sits back in her seat. “Okay. Your turn.”

“Good,” he sits up and leans one elbow on the table. “Tell me—as a worm, what will you do when someone tries to step on you?”

“Hope that the soil is soft enough to wiggle away,” Wendy answers calmly.

Gojo is unconvinced. “Sure… And if you get squashed anyway, what do you think Yoshi would do?”

Wendy’s mouth twitches downward. “I don’t control Yoshi. What she chooses to do is up to her.”

“No, it isn’t,” Gojo says, overly sweet. “Because we both know she’d be wrecked if she lost her little worm friend.” He is definitely not talking about worms anymore. “She would get emotional, and desperate, and those are dangerous things for a sorcerer. Your pain will hurt her. Your death would curse her.”

That’s the real crux of Gojo’s problem with Wendy. It’s what truly separates Yoshi from any normal sorcerer, beyond her talisman knowledge and upbringing in New York. She is attached to a non-sorcerer that could die at any moment. She is attached to a defenseless civilian that knows too much.

Wendy could die, she could be tortured into betraying Yoshi, she could be used as bait… Gojo can think of a thousand ways in which this weakness could be exploited.

“Ah,” Wendy sighs, her expression softening in comprehension. “I get it, Gojo.”

“Do you?” he mutters, skeptical. “Because you’re doing it to Nanami too. It’s dangerous for sorcerers to get so emotional, and you’re all emotion, aren’t you? You shouldn’t be involved with any sorcerers at all. There’s no way that this ends well for you.”

Frown deepening, Wendy huffs. “You think I haven’t thought of that before? That’s why we have the mirror sutra—“ Wendy pulls back her hair to show him the small tattoo behind her ear. “I’m not an idiot—“

“In this scenario, you’re a worm that can’t fight back,” he interrupts impatiently. “What happens to everyone after you die? Or do you not care?”

Her eyes narrow. “Everyone knows there’s a good chance that a worm will get squashed, or eaten, or dried out in the sun. That’s worm life for you. Mortal.”

“And you don’t feel the least bit responsible for what you’ll leave behind?” Gojo presses. “You’re a hypocrite, Wendy Matherson. If you cared about Yoshi at all, you wouldn’t get in her way so often.”

“I love my friends too much to let them go. It’s not hypocrisy, I’m just selfish for wanting more than I can give,” she tells him coldly. “That’s my red flag, Gojo. I’m emotional, I’m clingy, I’m greedy. So be it.”

The edge of the table begins to creak under the pressure from his fingertips. Gojo doesn’t know why he even bothered coming here. Wendy knew, she’s always known that what she’s doing to Yoshi is dangerous. And Yoshi seems perfectly fine with accepting it, too. Gojo knows can’t save those that run head-first towards death, but it’s frustrating—no, it’s insulting—to see it happen right in front of him.

He exhales slowly, not taking his eyes off her. “So that’s it then, hm?” Gojo mutters, seeing the impasse they’ve come to. “I’m an asshole, you’re a narcissist. Glad we’re on the same page.”

Wendy gives him a brief, insincere smile. “You take cookies your way, and I’ll do it my way.”

Gojo groans loudly, dropping his head. “Shut up already. The worm thing confused me enough,” he gripes. “Is this what you do with that English degree? You confuse men with weird allegories?”

“Absolutely,” Wendy nods fervently. “By the way, don’t do that. It’s very creepy that you already know I have a degree in English.”

“Thanks, I try.”

—/—/—/—

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A/N: thank you @nadiecomoyo for beta reading! mimizu, or ミミズ, is the Japanese word for earthworm. I'm making up things about Gojo's family, no idea if his dad is alive or not. Seems like the Gojo family is irrelevant to Gege Akutami, so I'm making them irrelevant to this story for now, too. me @ me: THIS CHAPTER IS JUST ALL TALKING UGHH I'M SO TIRED OF THESE JERKS!! STFU ABOUT WORMS 🤬🤬

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