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cheapshrimpysheep · 8 months

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Falling Asleep on Them

SUMMARY: How would they react to you falling asleep on them?

CHARACTERS: Demon Brothers (Lucifer; Mammon; Leviathan; Satan; Asmodeus; Beelzebub & Belphegor)

TAGS: Fluff; GN Reader; Bullet Points

WORD COUNT: An average of 240 words per character.

COMMENTS: I wanted to do Belphie's part like the others but it ended up being shorter and you'll see why. Just a little bullet points' list. But I hope you enjoy. ⭐️

⭐️ Falling Asleep on Them 2 - Side Characters

CONTEXT: This takes place in the original time-line of Obey Me! One master to rule them all! So you live with them in the House of Lamentation.

You were probably helping Lucifer with his paperwork in his office.

Taking a break to rest a little and drink tea, you sit down in one of the armchairs in front of the fireplace. He lets you sit on his lap if you want.

With so much paperwork, your head started to hurt a little and Lucifer suggests that you put your head on his shoulder and rest your head.

You were so comfortable that you ended up falling asleep.

When he notices, he smiles sweetly. He sees this as a way of showing how good you feel with him. Comfortable and safe.

He caresses your cheek. He thinks you're so cute. If you have long hair, he will stray it away from your face.

He will pick you up in his arms and take you to your bedroom.

If you are still dressed in your clothes, he will remove your shoes and accessories that you may have, leaving you with only your shirt and pants to make you more comfortable.

He leaves a note next to you saying "Don't worry, I'll finish the rest of the paperwork. Thank you. Good night, my love."

He kisses you on the forehead and leaves your bedroom.

After he finishes his work and before he goes to bed, he will stop by your room one last time to check on you. If you are awake and invite him to sleep with you, he will gladly accept.

You were watching a movie with Mammon in his bedroom. It was a calm film, perhaps even a little romantic.

You were snuggled up to each other. It was a calm film, perhaps even a little romantic. You were snuggled together, the lights were off, all the conditions were in place for you to fall asleep on him.

Me realizes you're asleep when he whispers something to you about the movie and you don't respond. He looks at you and listens carefully, your breathing is the slow breathing of someone who is sleeping.

If your head starts to fall forward, he will quickly catch it.

He'll be a little unsure of what to do, because he wants to take you to bed, but to do that he has to move, but he doesn't want to wake you up.

He manages to take you in his arms without waking you up and considers taking you to your bedroom. But he would have to go up those stairs in his bedroom and that could be dangerous.

He ends up laying you on his bed. You were already in your pajamas. He goes to lie down on the couch, but before that he admires you sleeping. He wants to kiss you so much, but he doesn't want to wake you up, so he gives you a light kiss on the cheek.

And he takes a photo (or a few) of you sleeping in his bed before going back to the couch.

He ends up sleeping on the couch. Unless you wake up in the middle of the night and invite him to sleep with you.

You were hanging out with Levi in his room, late at night, and ended up staying next to him watching him play a game.

It was a cute and very peaceful game. Then you laid your head on his shoulder, which already made him blush, and meanwhile you fell asleep.

He realizes you're asleep when he sees one of your hands slide lazily across your lap.

He panics a little. He needs to pick you up and take you to bed, but he can't wake you up. He needs a plan.

He does everything possible and impossible to hold you in his arms without waking you up. You look so cute when you sleep that waking you up now would be like breaking the most beautiful thing in the world.

He uses his tail to open and close his bedroom door and yours. He also uses it to adjust your bed.

He will put you in bed with the utmost care, and will slowly take a step back to make sure he didn't wake you up.

Seeing that you continue to sleep peacefully, he will watch you as if he idolizes you. And will take a bunch of photos to use as his wallpapers.

Maybe he fell asleep in your room while looking at you. You can always invite him to sleep with you if you wake up in the middle of the night.

You and Satan were reading books in his room. You were cuddled up to each other when you fell asleep.

He realized that you had fallen asleep when he saw the book you were holding slowly fall from your lap.

He quickly marked the page you were on with one of his fingers before the book closed for then place a kitten marker on it. He does the same with his book, trying not to move too much so as not to wake you.

The two of you were practically already lying on his bed and taking you to your room, at the risk of tripping over a book, would be dangerous. So instead, he tucks you into his bed.

As he has a single bed, he ends up leaving you alone in bed so you can be more comfortable.

But before he goes, he looks at you, appreciating you under the moonlight. You were so beautiful. He kisses your cheek softly and goes to the armchair.

He ends up falling asleep in the armchair, facing you because he was alternating between reading his book and looking at you sleeping.

You can always invite him to sleep with you if you wake up in the middle of the night. He will accept it for sure.

You and Asmo were having a super relaxing beauty treatment. Asmo almost fell asleep too, but managed to stop himself from doing so.

He notices that you are very still and silent and calls out to you in a sweet, low voice. He notices that you are very still and silent and calls out to you in a sweet, low voice. But you don't respond, and that's how he realizes you've fallen asleep.

He immediately jumps up from where he was sitting or lying down and approaches you to watch you for a bit. OMG you are so cute! he has to take some pics! Some just with you, others with him next to you and kissing you on the face softly, so as not to wake you up.

Well, he's not very strong, but he needs to get you to bed, or at least a bed. So the furthest he can take you without the risk of waking you up is to his bed.

Although his bed is large, it is a single bed. However, he has no other place to sleep. I mean, he won't sleep in a chair or armchair, that would ruin his beauty sleep. But he also doesn't want to sleep with you without knowing if you would accept it.

So, at great cost because he finds you adorable in your sleep, he wakes you up with soft kisses and saying your name sweetly. And he will ask you if he can sleep with you or if you prefer to go to sleep in your room.

You probably did a lot of physical exercise with Beel. Either you went for a walk in a place with steep terrain, or played a sports game together, something you liked or didn't mind doing with him.

Practicing this type of physical activity together can greatly strengthen a relationship, which is why he really wanted to do something with you. Whatever it was, it ended up being exhausting for you.

If your legs were sore, he carried you back home in his arms.

You two take a shower and go to his and Belphie's room to rest together. But your feet still feel sore, and when you mention this to Beel, he offers to give them a massage.

You two still chat a little, but your tiredness mixed with Beel's massage makes you relax until you fall asleep.

He realizes you've fallen asleep when you stop responding to him. He looks at you sleeping and smiles, thinking that you're really cute.

He easily picks you up and takes you to your bed. He's used to doing the same thing with Belphie, but in your case, he's much more careful not to wake you up.

He lays you down on the bed and really wants to kiss you goodnight on the forehead.

If he wakes you up with his kiss, he'll feel a little bad and apologize. And this will be your opportunity to invite him to sleep with you if you want.

I mean, how could you not fall asleep on Belphie? He loves to sleep and more than that he loves to snuggle and cuddle with you. So that's how you end up falling asleep most of the time and he just sleeps with you.

But if somehow, he's awake on the couch and you fall asleep on his shoulder while he's distracted on his D.D.D. or something, he will... lay you down on the couch and sleep with you.

He won't bother taking you to a bed and will definitely use the fact that you've already fallen asleep to sleep right there with you.

If you want to sleep in a bed, you will have to wake up and wake him up so you can go to your bed. And of course he will ask if he can continue sleeping with you in your bed.

No matter where you fall asleep, he will simply lie down next to you and sleep with you.

If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

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indigovigilance · 8 months

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A Nightingale Sang in 1941

This is my inaugural meta (yay!) Eventually I will learn how to add gifs and whatnot to make this more interesting but today, I give you a wall of text.

I need to give credit where credit is due to three existing metas that I’m drawing upon heavily here:

A speculative continuation of the 1941 story, which includes an almost-kiss while “A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square” plays on the gramophone,

A behavioral analysis of Aziraphale during the S2E6 finale (will find ref later if possible)

A meta-analysis of the way in which “coffee” is used as a symbolic equivalent for liberty and freedom of choice, a running theme of this show (will find ref later if possible)

I’m going to expand upon meta #2 and #3 and explain why I think there is are very compelling reasons to believe that #1 will be canonized.

At the end of S1E6, an instrumental version of “A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square” plays diegetically, but the lyrical version plays non-diegetically over the credits (we hear it but the protagonists don’t). So we the audience could plausibly say “that’s their song,” but as of the close of S1, we have no reason to believe that they know that it’s their song. Even Aziraphale’s S1E3 (1967) suggestion that they dine at the Ritz could be a reference that only he gets, or just a fancy restaurant suggestion.

So when I was watching S2E6 and Crowley said “no nightingales,” I was jarred. What does that even mean? We know it has something to do with dining at the Ritz, but what does it mean to them? The reference only works if they know it’s their song. But we’ve only ever seen them hear it together after the averted apocalypse; if this is the direct reference that Crowley is making, it leaves our 1967 reference contextless and twisting in the wind.

If we assume that there was a romantic story beat in 1941, wherein “A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square” (which, incidentally, was written in 1939 and saw the height of its popularity at the end of 1940, so timeline-wise it’s spot-on) became their song, then a lot of events get renewed interpretations through this lens, in a way that makes this story much more cohesive and the “no nightingales” comment even more soul-shattering than it already was.

Let’s presume that immediately after this became their song and just as they were discovering their romantic potential, they were forced back into hiding. Forever after, references to the song serve as a macro for “I’d like to pick up where we left off that night.”

The 1967 suggestion of “dining at the Ritz” now becomes a directly romantic suggestion. It also gives better context for “you go too fast for me.”

Actually going to the Ritz in 2019 is not simply a celebration or even a callback to 1967, it’s a callback to their almost-romance of 1941.

When Crowley says “no nightingales” in 2023, this isn’t to say “we’re not going to eat together at the Ritz anymore.” It’s saying that the romance that began that night, the precious, fragile romance, is over.

I’ll give you a moment to dry your eyes before we move on to metas #2 and #3.

In light that this is what has been going on - they know they want a romantic relationship but have gotten so used to hiding and denying it that they are more comfortable keeping the status quo static and quo-y then trying to achieve their ideal - a lot of S2 behavior can get a fresh view.

Crowley’s reaction to Nina isn’t a realization that he’s in love - he knew that already. You can only ask someone to run away with you so many times before you are forced to admit some things to yourself. No, he’s realizing that trying to hide it (which was justified by survival), hasn’t been working, but despite failing at being stealth nothing bad has happened. He’s realizing that it may finally be safe to show it.

Crowley’s confession, then, is not a revelation. It’s making the subtext text. He’s not telling Aziraphale anything he didn’t already know. He’s saying it now because he thinks he’s safe to do so. Pin in that.

Lots of people have lots of theories about Aziraphale’s motivations in the S2 finale, which can more or less be divided into 4 camps: the genuinely held belief, the coffee theory, the lie theory, and the mutual trick theory (some version of the body-switching at the end of S1). Let me start by saying that I love all the fans and all their theories and I find their analyses to be insightful. The genuinely held belief theory, while I believe it to be erroneous, has been incredibly conducive to so many wonderful conversations and I love being in a community that has those conversations. But I’m going to explain why I think the lie theory finds the most support in canon.

Re-watch the finale (when you feel like you can) from 35:18 to 36:19 and then from 40:45 to the end, paying very close attention to Aziraphale’s words and his eyes. Michael Sheen is telling us a LOT with his eyes, and in the back half of the finale scene, with pacing.

For 60 seconds of footage, this setup is doing a lot of work. If Neil Gaiman wasn’t doing enough to beat us over the head with how evil the Metatron is, that glare at Crowley at the end with the non-diegetic ominous horns should convey the message. But again, focusing on Aziraphale. He initially refuses to talk to the Metatron; he’s made his position quite clear. There is no hint of regret or wavering; this is not someone who’s aching to return to the fold. The Metatron ignores his refusal and functionally forces him to accept a “cup of coffee.” The coffee isn’t spiked, but it is a metaphor. It is symbolic of choice. The Metatron is going to force Aziraphale to make a choice. Meta #3 does a great job of exploring the idea that a choice between anything and death is never really a choice. Hang onto that thought.

Notice I had you start up again 3 seconds before “The Conversation.” That’s because it’s important to note where the Metatron is right now. He is across the street, staring straight in through those giant windows to where our protagonists are about to have The Conversation. He is watching.

When Aziraphale returns, Crowley begins his “let me talk” riff. Aziraphale ought to be interested in what Crowley has to say, since the preamble is pretty compelling. You’ll notice that Aziraphale quickly turns to the window and back, through which he (but not we) can see the Metatron standing there, watching them. Aziraphale is then doing his best to get Crowley to STFU without raising the suspicion of the Metatron, eventually having to cut him off.

Because unfortunately, Crowley’s entire impetus for speaking up now is that it’s safe to do so. Only Aziraphale knows that they are in very real danger (or at least, Crowley is, but I’ll come back to that).

You might take something from the fact that he’s shaking his head while talking about “incredibly good news,” and seems to self-censor his criticism of Metatron (or more specifically, he takes ownership of any criticism of the Metatron, censoring out Crowley’s role in that, with the emphasis on I in “I might have misjudged him”).

Notice in the flashback that he begins the conversation reasonably relaxed. The Metatron also says a series of things about him that not only are false, but everyone, including the Metatron and Crowley, know are false: Aziraphale is not a leader, he’s a defector; he’s not honest, he lies all the time, in fact this entire season revolved around his one huge lie of hiding Gabriel. Not only does the justification not make sense coming from Metatron, but it shouldn’t make sense that Aziraphale would accept these reasons and it shouldn’t make sense to Crowley either. So is Aziraphale including these details in his recounting to Crowley so that he will get suspicious and figure out the jig? Maybe. Let’s continue.

Immediately upon being offered the job of Supreme Archangel, Aziraphale says “but I don’t want to go back to Heaven.” This is direct evidence against the genuinely held belief theory. If returning to Heaven and making a difference was a genuine motivation, we would have gotten a different response at this moment. But then we get something more.

“Where would I get my coffee?”

This is a beautiful response for a number of reasons; coffee should be trivial compared to the opportunity to be a Supreme Archangel, so it serves to highlight just how little interest Aziraphale has in returning. Taken at face value, it’s the Aziraphale equivalent of “not even at gunpoint.” But remember that coffee is a metaphor for liberty in this universe and this season. So what Aziraphale just said, in the language of Neil Gaiman metaphors, is:

I don’t want to go back to Heaven, I would rather have free will.

What does the Metatron do next?

He brings up Crowley.

Watch Aziraphale’s eyes before and after the mention of Crowley. He goes from confused to eye-flicking panic in the space of two syllables. Aziraphale already understands that his “no” is not being accepted, and that bringing Crowley into it can only possibly serve as a threat.

So the coffee, the choice, is a false choice. No one ever orders death. The Metatron has forced Aziraphale into a situation that looks an awful lot like a choice (it comes in a blue cup, after all) but it isn’t.

We definitely have some reliable narrator problems here. I’m going to presume for purposes of analysis that these cut-outs are accurate but incomplete, and that a more explicit threat about what would happen to Crowley if Aziraphale did not return to Heaven was made.

If we assume that Aziraphale has been made aware of a threat and is trying to hide that from Crowley, the rest of this scene reads very differently. Aziraphale cannot say, “you are in danger but you will be safe if you swear your allegiance to Heaven” or “I have to go, no matter what, and the only way we can be together is if you come with me,” but nonetheless he now has to convince Crowley to do the one thing he ought to know Crowley definitely doesn’t want to do all through subtext. Which we’ve spent an entire season establishing that they can’t communicate well when they are allowed to use their words. Disastrously, this is not a magic trick that Aziraphale can make work when it counts. Their failure to practice good communication means that, right now, when it counts most, they are not going to pull it off.

We see that Aziraphale is very hopeful that Crowley will pick up on his cues and play along. Obviously, he doesn’t.

If the whole riff about Hell being bad guys and Heaven being the side of truth and light is taken as genuine, it discards a massive amount of character development that we’ve witnessed in Job, Edinburgh, etc. (again, to all the genuine belief subscribers, I think it’s a compelling argument but it simply doesn’t account for the evidence). So if it’s not genuine, why say it? Again, to alert Crowley that something is Off, because Crowley should know that Aziraphale doesn’t actually believe that. They saved humanity from Heaven and Hell. They hid Gabriel from Heaven and Hell. Crowley knows that Aziraphale knows that Heaven and Hell are just two sides of the same coin. Notice again that Aziraphale glances out the window while he’s talking up Heaven; he knows the Metatron is watching, he can’t not defend the position of Heaven. I think it’s also worth noting that Aziraphale forcefully glances and gestures off to Crowley’s left (away from the window) when talking about Hell, and then turns his head to Crowley’s right (towards the window) to try to get him to realize that a representative of Heaven is literally standing right over there, just look out the window please dumbass!

When Crowley is asking Aziraphale if he said no, and we see the back of Aziraphale’s head, again we can see him turn his head to glance out the window. This is also when he changes strategies, and admits that Heaven could use a little reform. Because now there’s a problem almost as big as getting caught, which is that he won’t be able to get Crowley to go with him.

Which unfortunately makes the next part of this so much more heartbreaking. Because when Crowley begins his speech about being a team, Aziraphale wants to hear it. He can’t bring himself to shut down Crowley again, even though it could get them both in massive trouble. Notice that he glances out the window again during this, and the look of panic on his face. He begins to shake his head when Crowley mentions that Heaven and Hell are toxic; this can be taken a lot of ways but I’ll argue for the interpretation that he’s trying to get Crowley to STFU and stop saying shit that could get him destroyed.

After Crowley puts on his sunglasses we are in the “back half” and Sheen is doing a lot with phrasing here, specifically pregnant pauses.

“Come with me… to Heaven!”

“We can be together… as angels!”

Based on the pacing decision I am thoroughly convinced that the first half of each of these statements is intended to be the message to Crowley and the second half is always a qualifying statement to satisfy the Metatron.

Unfortunately, these pregnant pauses are completely backfiring in their effect on Crowley. The sentiment gives him hope and the qualifying statement crushes it again immediately. He is being taken on a horrible emotional rollercoaster with these declarations which are only further amping up his instinct to run away.

The only truly genuine, unaldulterated statement I think we get from Aziraphale is

“I need you!”

When it becomes clear to Aziraphale that there’s been an irreparable breakdown of communication between them and the subtext is not getting across, he says:

“I don’t think you understand what I’m offering you.”

He means this literally. Crowley has not understood that Aziraphale is offering him protection from whatever threat the Metatron has made.

Which makes this part extra-devastating and also absolutely in keeping with a major running theme of this season.

“I understand. I think I understand a whole lot better than you do.”

Your understanding and my understanding are different understandings.

Crowley views the offer to return to Heaven through the lens of his trauma. He understands what life in Heaven would be like. But he doesn’t understand that Aziraphale is offering him protection.

But Aziraphale just heard Crowley say that he understood everything, and he’s still going to leave. There might be a little suspense of disbelief here to believe that Aziraphale really interpreted the statement this way, but we know that Aziraphale isn’t always the brightest battery-operated candle in the drawer. So under the assumption that Crowley did understand him and is still rejecting the offer, rejecting him—

“Well, then there’s nothing more to say.”

Please pay very close attention to Aziraphale’s body language for the next part. He’s active, agitated, turning side to side, arms swinging. This is a very fidgety angel.

“No nightingales.”

Aziraphale is now completely still. He’s feeling that feeling. You know it. The one where your entire body is getting sucked into the pit of your stomach. The aching paralysis.

This is their song, the one that began their romance in 1941, the secret code for all other attempts at flirtation. Crowley has walked out on him before, Aziraphale has been stubborn and obstinate before. But they always came back together, sometimes with an apology dance or other rituals that belonged solely to them.

But now the song is over.

By saying this, Crowley has broken up with Aziraphale. We can see in Aziraphale’s sudden transition from fidgety to paralysis that he has understood it this way.

Then he turns away from the window so that the Metatron won’t see him cry.

The kiss was heart-wrenching already. But we’re not done with this analysis.

During the kiss, Aziraphale has a choice to make between two very compelling bad choices. This is the Job dilemma. But worse.

If he doesn’t kiss Crowley back, he will let Crowley think that he doesn’t love him. He will have missed out on this (maybe/probably their first kiss?) and regret it forever.

If he does kiss Crowley back, in full view of the Metatron, they are in deep trouble.

He seems to do his best to split the difference. I would even go so far to say that the awkward arm waving is Aziraphale acting for the Metatron’s benefit, to try to portray that he doesn’t want this even though he absolutely does (just not like this). The anguish when they break the kiss is absolutely real, and the first thing he does is glance out the window. Through all this he has remained painfully aware of their spectator.

He wants to say I love you. He mouths it. He breathes it.

But the Metatron is watching.

He can’t tell Crowley I love you. So he has to say the only other thing that has always unequivocally meant “I love you” when he said it to Crowley. He has to hope that Crowley understands him now, even though he never has before.

Spoiler alert: Crowley doesn’t.

My forgiveness and your forgiveness are not the same forgiveness.

One more point against the genuine belief fans (I love you): if the offer to let Crowley back in is what changed his mind, then Crowley declining removes that incentive. Aziraphale should/would have consequently retreated to his last stated position of “I don’t want to go back to Heaven, where would I get my Crowley—I mean, coffee?” [post-publication nod to @theonevoice for a great little meta] It simply doesn’t hold up to scrutiny.

I think a lot of fans were already making these assumptions about the use of the nightingale song so this meta may not feel revelatory, however, it isn’t canon (yet), and I’m sure I’ll find company that agree that canonization of this connection would strengthen a lot of these story points, as evidenced by how it is already assumed by many fans.

If you made it to the end - omg thank you! Please leave a note and tell me your thoughts!

Bonus: somebody already made the song connection here

~~~

if you liked this, you may also like:

Book of Life and what it means for Crowley

The Erasure of Human!Metatron

Baraqiel and Azazel

~~~

Recommended related (lie theory) metas by other people:

making the subtext text by @theonevoice

Aziraphale's Decision Matrix by @yowlthinks

Nothing Lasts Forever: META by @phoen1xr0se

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hatosaur · 4 months

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it's pretty implied that ellie never came out to joel in the proper sense. she lets him assume that she's into men, gives him the false satisfaction of "seeing" her "crush" on jesse, does not correct him. she's fairly confident in being gay in public for others to see and having others close to her know; so why not correct him? why dodge the topic?

was it out of fear? could it be that she never broached the topic despite being close to him in the early years because of the possibility of his reaction being negative? that she was afraid that out of all things that could force them apart (further apart after they split), him reacting badly to her being gay would be the worst?

what about at the dance? would she have been as wound up as she was if the moment hadn't been an encounter with a vicious homophobe? maybe she would've still snapped without this context, but why is she immediately on the defensive against joel after he sticks up for her?

what about the porch scene? why did she refute his question of dina being her girlfriend so insecurely, looking away, nervously and quietly stumbling over words? why isn't she mean about it? why doesn't she get defensive at the question? why did she lash out again when he expressed acceptance?

i think these scenes revolving around her queerness indicate it as such; that ellie never told joel for fear of a response, that she lets him think what he wants because that's the easiest way for it to be. then, when she's ready to face off against a homophobe, because that's the way things are, that's what she can expect, and joel defends her, she lashes out.

it's such a clear juxtaposition of support and hatred between joel and seth, and being faced with joel's acceptance is too much, makes her turn to the anger she'd been holding onto and reinforce what she thinks is true -- that she doesn't need him. and in the fallout, as her regret dawns on her, so too does the realization; he was protecting her, like always, without hesitation, over this thing she was always afraid he wouldn't accept her for.

in the porch scene, joel chooses his words wisely, and asks if dina is her girlfriend -- not "so you're gay?" or "why did you never tell me?" or "how long has this been a thing?" -- with such a casuality that it seems to throw her off. it's like ellie can hardly get the words out. she refutes the idea, fumbles for each following part of her response, is tense. she wasn't prepared for the question.

and when he finally asserts his support for her, in as explicit terms as he can, you can see ellie become emotional, touched for a moment but overcome, before she launches into the defensive again, exactly like at the dance scene -- meeting his kindness with hostility as a way to cope with her emotions.

and then, in response to her basically saying her life doesn't matter, he affirms that it does.

so he's now affirmed two things that ellie has doubted: that he accepts her being a lesbian, and that her life matters. a conflation of the two, in ellie's mind, may have come after; and after that, her olive branch.

and yeah, him affirming these things for her is fully in the context of his overwhelming parental love for her and her complex feelings about being the cure, but within a queer subtext, it means more. it's such a familiar thing to slink around loved ones and hide being gay/queer for fear of any type of response, and lying by omission in conversation just to keep that state of peace, of normalcy. ellie, with all her brutishness and bravery, falls into it like anyone else, because even while mad at him, she valued that response from him.

a lot of people seem to think that the approach to ellie's queerness is nonchalant, that it's just some unrelated thing about her, but i think that it holds more weight in the narrative that what is explicitly spelled out. it's subtle but it was a deliberate choice to place her queerness at the center of the confrontation. i think that's why ellie's relationship with dina took center stage in the story, and why so much time is devoted to just them -- because her being queer matters to her character, but in a way that perhaps only a queer person can see, analyze, and appreciate (without being blatant enough to anger certain other fans).

#i've been re-evaluating my long-conflicting feelings on the concept of coming out #tlou #the last of us #tlou2 #the last of us part 2 #this isn't an internet breaking take #i'm sure someone has said this before #but i'm just...thinking.#the meta of us #talkies #ellie williams #joel miller

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letters-to-lgbt-kids · 3 months

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My dear lgbt+ kids,

So, you have been in a relationship for a while and you’re ready and eager to take the next step - but your partner isn’t. What now?

The “next step” I’m referring to here could mean a lot of different things because relationships do not all follow one specific timeline (and also because my readers may be of wildly different ages and live in wildly different situations) but I am thinking of any “deepening our commitment” things here: for example introducing them to your friends or your family, moving in together or (if you are in a situation where that’s a legal possibility) even marriage or having a child together.

Whatever the step actually looks like, you may have this romantic idea of “If they’re right for you, you’ll always naturally want to take these steps at the same time”… but that’s not really how relationships work in real life. Even in the healthiest relationship and even if you absolutely feel like they’re your soulmate, you may still disagree on when to take those steps or even on whether you want to take these steps at all.

In fact, it’s uniquely frustrating if everything else is going well. If their refusal to meet your mom is just another point on the long list of behaviors that make you feel like they don’t really care about you, that’s also painful but it’s easier to give advice there: maybe you should think about breaking up. It’s tempting to believe that you can make them love you more if you move in with them or that they’ll treat you better once you get engaged, but that won’t work out. You can’t fix a broken relationship by deepening the commitment - commitment needs a stable foundation to grow. And this doesn’t only go for outright abusive relationships: they may be a wonderful person but you two just have entirely different goals and needs, and those won’t suddenly overlap more just because you moved in with them or married them.

With all that being said: if there IS a healthy and stable foundation, if you are happy in every other aspect and they’re just hesitant about this one specific step, then jumping straight to “break up with them” would obviously be pretty unhelpful advice. Differing opinions occur even in the most compatible couple, you are both whole people with your own individual feelings and those do not necessarily doom the whole relationship. It’s important to see this situation in the context of the relationship in general.

You may be able to guess that a big portion of the advice is just gonna be “Communicate with your partner” - but first of all, I’d advise you to have an open and honest conversation with yourself. Why is this step of commitment so important to you? What does it mean to you? Do you feel a sense of urgency in taking it and if so, why? Is this specific step the only possible path for your need to be met? Are you open to alternative approaches, are you open to waiting (and if so, for how long)? The purpose of these questions is definitely not to convince yourself to give up on your needs or to talk yourself into a compromise you’re not really happy with! The opposite of that, actually: It’s helpful to reflect on what exactly you want and why you want it, so you have the clarity you need to discuss it productively. You don’t want to agree to something that ultimately leaves you unsatisfied and bitter, but you also don’t want to push hard for something you later on realize doesn’t even mean that much to you.

When you feel confident enough about your own stance to discuss it with your partner, the most important thing to remember is: you’re on the same team. The goal here isn’t to “win” or to change their mind, but to see each others perspective better and find a solution you’re both happy with. Listen with an open mind. Try to understand before you try to influence. Remind yourself that your partner isn’t your enemy, they also want the best outcome for both of you - otherwise you (hopefully) wouldn’t want to commit to them!

Something you should get clarification on during your conversations: is it a hard no (do not want to do that at all ever), a soft no (open to alternatives or adjustments), a no for now (want to do it but not yet), a yes but (want to do it but only under certain circumstances or in a different way than your original plan) or a I don’t know? How does this affect your feelings on the situation? (I’m sure that even just while reading these different scenarios, some instinctively feel better or worse than others! But it’s still important to take some time to sit with any new information that comes up during those conversations. Neither of you should feel pressured or rushed here!)

You may find that they just never considered that there may be multiple approaches to that step (an example for this would be that they are not actually opposed to the idea of being married to you, just to the idea of a wedding, and didn’t consider yet that eloping is also a possibility) - but don’t set yourself up for disappointment by expecting the conversation to 100% go that way. It may also be a hard no, and that wouldn’t make them a horrible person. People can deeply, truly love someone and still do not want to take certain steps with them. It’s a good idea to remind yourself that you’re not “in the right” or “the better person” for wanting to take those steps. While certain steps may be a big part of your own future plans or even of your identity and self-image (and that’s valid!), they are just personal preferences. It’s not a moral obligation to want them, and your partner isn’t mean for not wanting them. But, of course, at this point we also need to say: if you can not imagine a life where you never get married, you are not a horrible person for breaking up with a partner who can not imagine to ever marry. “Irreconcilable differences” are a common breakup reason for a reason.

So, to summarize: Building a strong foundation is crucial before taking big steps. Communicate openly with yourself first - understand why you want to take this step and if there are alternatives. When talking to your partner, remember you're a team; it's not about winning but understanding each other. Be open to different responses, from a clear no to conditions on a yes. Do not pressure your partner but do not completely give up on your own happiness either.

The journey of commitment should be a shared adventure - not a battle or a competitive race!

With all my love,

Your Tumblr Dad

#lgbt #lgbt+

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imagine-silk · 5 months

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Hello! May I request fallout 4 companions (Nick especially) with Sole who shares the bare minimum of information about themselves? Not because Sole doesn’t trust them, they really enjoy theirs companions company. Perhaps they busy themselves so they don’t have to think about all the little and big things they miss. (I bet Codsworth would find pristine things that Sole would miss (like a favorite movie, vinyl, or comic?))

Sorry if its not something you’re interested in doing right now. The ask kinda came out as a ramble, I’m lacking sleep haha. Thanks again for considering my request!

》Honestly one of my favorite kinds of characters.

【Cait】 She doesn't appreciate it. Her contract was traded to some random weirdo who barely says anything. It took three days before the topic of your name came up. And two weeks to know what you were looking for, who. But in return you don't ask what she does on her own time or what she's done. It feels like you don't mind rather than you don't care and that makes her feel seen. It stays between you unsaid in her eyes.

♡If romanced she doesn't push for any information. You'll tell her if it's important. People think it's weird the two of you to not share about yourselves like normal people but you're happy, that's all that matters.

【Codsworth】 It's just like it was before. He, unlike the others, already knows you. He knows you very well. Not only did you do an intake for daily preferences but he also served you for a few years. While you're out and about you'll do something or say something that sounds like no information to others or out of context and he'll answer, "Just as I was thinking as well." While you camp with some of the other companions he does chores the way you like without needing to ask, making comment on recent events, which makes them jealous for sure. He digs up things from the house he preserved or found and fixes them up brand new before presenting it to you. Songs you liked or wanted to hear. Movies and shows and comics. Clothes pressed for you and the furniture is redone the way it used to be. He knows you and wants to keep it that way.

【Curie】 Low-key doesn't care. She has one thing on her mind and that's her own goal to better medicine. Finding things to do that is all she needs of you. When she goes to be a synth her feelings overwhelm her and you guide her through that. She's never ever asked about you. She'll tell you about what she's feeling but never thinks to ask what you feel. In her defense, is doesn't understand the nuance of social interactions. And to her credit, it works for the both of you.

♡If she's romanced she realizes she wants to know what you feel and if it's the same as her. She's mostly interested in what you feel now rather than what your opinion is in the past or isn't currently relevant.

【Danse】 Right away he doesn't care for it. A mercenary who talks very little can be dangerous. But you followed orders well and are a damn good shot. The way he asks is more like demanding. It was all for a vetting process but still rude. After the intake he didn't care about your lack of openness. Didn't matter to him personally. After BB he suddenly regrets not knowing you. He was so rude and dismissed you as another faceless soldier and you saved him, from the Brotherhood and himself. Now he wants to know you.

♡If romanced he makes effort to know you, like really know you. For a long time he refused individuality so his own sense of self is not great. But you know yourself and make no attempt to hide it. You are so sure of yourself you don't need to explain. That's one of the things he loves about you.

【Deacon】 He thinks you're like him, that you want to hide in plain sight. As much as he gives that to you he's nosy as fuck and takes every chance to learn about you, mostly from afar. It doesn't take any time at all for him to realize you'll just tell him. Most of them are one word answers. It takes him even less time after that to realize you'll comment on things from before the war especially.

♡If romanced he goes out of his way to show you stuff. Old posters and toys. If you follow my headcanon that he's pre-war, he makes old references and generally adds comments on things to bait your answers.

【Hancock】 He thinks it's pretty cool. "Oh, tall, dark, and handsome/beautiful." He does play twenty questions with you 24/7 and is very happy with your half-answers because an answer is still an answer. Plus he knows at least two other people like you. He is the one who figures out that you just don't have the time or think about talking about yourself rather than purposely keeping secrets the fastest. He knows people so he knows better.

♡If romanced he plays with it. You want a kiss? Tell him what's your favorite color. He'll get on his knees if you tell him what you like about your new home. But honestly he'll do it anyways. All he needs to know is that you want him like he wants you.

【MacCready】 He was more concerned about you putting a bullet in his head while his back was turned. Everyone in the Commonwealth was looking out for number one. So imagine his surprise when you were looking out for your number one and it wasn't you. Not only were you looking for your son but you stopped to help every person who asked for help. Your actions spoke to him in a way your words, he figured, couldn't. You didn't need to help him but you did. You didn't take the caps back. And you killed the gunners the second they turned their guns on him even when they said their beef wasn't with you. It was what you did, not what you told him.

♡If romanced he will ask things. Basic ones are like, "How was your day?" Normal questions that are the peak of domestic life. Then the more personal things. Some sound silly, "What's your favorite color?" But most build off of a quick thing you said in passing, "Wait, you've been to California? What was it like?" He trusts you'll tell him the truth.

【Nick】 As a private detective this simply won't do. He gets it at first, you just need him to find your son, it's business. However, you want him to stay with you after that. It confuses him because you made no indication you like him in the slightest way. He's the second fastest to realize you're not keeping to yourself on purpose. As one of the only ones who are pre-war he's able to get things the others can't. He'll talk about things and give his options and bait you into answering it. That was a common way to get people to talk back then when you were trying to be polite and keep up the conversation, even if the conversation stays a bit thin.

♡If he's romanced he makes fun of the fact you forget to say things about yourself. Don't get it wrong, he makes it clear you don't need to share. He's just poking fun.

【Piper】 This simply won't do. She asks as many question as they come up but she gets depressing short answers. You either give one word answers or say you're not really in the mood, on some occasions you admit you don't know, you never thought about it. It takes a long time for her to stop and that's only because the questions start getting old. And you still feel like a mystery even though you've told her everything.

♡If she's romanced she realizes how much you've told her and pushes it. What is your type? How do your lips feel? Why do you look so good? It becomes playful and light, never serious.

【Preston】 In the beginning he didn't realize he didn't know much about you. He took your help selfishly to get him and his people back on stable ground but you told him you were happy to help. So he takes time to learn about you and give you everything he could possibly help you with. In hopes you would share by yourself he gives things to you without any prompt. It doesn't really work most of the time.

♡If romanced he asks things with hearts in his eyes. He is so lovesick he takes all of your half-answers and files it away in his mind. It hardly matters at that point.

【X6】 It wasn't his mission so he didn't care. You owed him no explanation or justification. Doesn't mean he doesn't question you. He asks why you helped someone, why you stopped for a distraction. And of course you give short answers like, "They needed help." or "I wanted to." Later, after the Institute is gone, he sees how you carry yourself and tries to copy it. Obviously he can't so you help him too. You showed him he can figure himself out by himself and he didn't need you. So he held the same opinion; he doesn't need to know you like that.

♡If romanced he's still comfortable with you keeping things to yourself. It's only after months of being together do you realize he's never asked you a personal question, that you've never shared anything that personal. When you bring that to him he tells you that hardly matters. But seeing you make the effort after that gives him a feeling he can't describe. It's a good feeling he thinks.

#ask and you shall receive #fallout 4 #fallout imagines #fallout x reader #companions react #gender neutral reader #cait #curie #codsworth #danse #deacon fo4 #hancock #maccready #nick valentine #piper wright #preston garvey #x6 88

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daisukitoo · 11 months

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I am 15% of the way through Harrow the Ninth. There are no plot spoilers below.

"Second person, past tense" is a really weird choice for a novel's narration, and I will be disappointed if this does not pay off mightily.

Most pieces I see in second person POV are short stories. The goal is to establish intimacy and immediacy, and they are most commonly in the present tense. The notion is that the action is happening to you, right now, and you are finding out about it as you the reader go through the story. Occasionally you see such a story in the future tense, suggesting someone is prophesying to you.

Second person, past tense is someone telling you your own history. This is kind of weird. One assumes a Memento story with an amnesia premise, or similarly Merlin living backwards in time. The second person here raises the question of who is telling you the story. The past tense raise the question of why you need someone to tell you your own story.

That our protagonist is explicitly and demonstrably insane gives us a lot of "why," although the particular "why" depends on the "who." The most obvious "who" is that Harrow is telling herself her own story. We have already seen Harrow telling herself her own story within this story, so adding another layer of recursion seems obvious and later adding multiple seems fun.

But here we reach a fork that we cannot resolve this early in the book. Is Harrow in a moment of lucidity telling herself what she should already know? Is Harrow in a moment of insanity hallucinating a new history? Is Harrow just lying to herself because the ending of Gideon the Ninth was too painful?

Harrow the Ninth is sometimes described as gaslighting the reader about Gideon the Ninth. Someone is not telling the truth about something here. One character seems to have noticed, but it is hard to be sure when our narrator is unreliable and may be hallucinating and/or lying.

Gideon was a somewhat unreliable narrator not in the sense that she lied (except perhaps about her emotions, except perhaps mostly to herself) but in that she was not paying attention, like the meme post in circulation about a movie showing the start of World War I from the perspective of a pet pigeon. You can probably identify all the important plot points of Gideon the Ninth by how boring Gideon finds them.

Harrow is more classically unreliable. She has a skewed perspective, and within that perspective she hallucinates, and on top of those hallucinations she will deceive herself and others. This early in the book, we already have many examples of Harrow seeing things that aren't there. She tends to realize within a page or two that she is hallucinating. The big news at some point should be that those little hallucinations were within the context of a larger hallucination and/or lie.

And now I need to go finish the book so I can check my Tumblr notifications without worrying about spoilers in the notes.

#harrow the ninth #tlt #the locked tomb #tamsyn muir #harrowhark nonagesimus

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ohara-n-brown · 4 months

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I feel like people don't want to accept personality disorders as neurodivergencies because doing so would make us face the fact that they deserve accomodations too.

People with PDs need Accomodations too!!!

Like, yes. People with BPD do legitimately have a different style, context, and understanding of socialization. Just like Autism.

And just like Autism, PWBPD deserve relationship accomodations and their unique socialization style respected.

They may need more attention, or more verbal assurance. Thats accomodation!!

Some people with BPD cannot read nonverbal affection or affirmation. They need it said to them. And being extra clear with them - is accomdation.

Yes, people with NPD may need support, or affirmation, or for you to be clear with your approval, or acknowledge their accomplishments instead of acting like their behavior is expected.

THAT'S ACCOMODATION!!

Like we can understand that Autism and ADHD comes with different patterns of socialization that makes our relationships look different than those of neurotypicals-

So why wouldn't that be the same with them????

I feel like denying people with BPD or NPD or people who are Bipolar their neurodivergency denies them the accomodations they so desperately need.

People with PDs get punished and scrutinized for the way they communicate and their needs in relationships - JUST LIKE AUTISM AND ADHD

Instead of trying to get them to 100% conform to the idea and image of neurotypical relationships can we realize that the people around them will have to meet them halfway in understanding their CURRENT communication style

And that these people are NOT a burden because they require so.

The same as us. Coming to understand an autistic family member or friend means understanding you may need to be clearer, or more direct than with others.

Coming to understand a family member with BPD for instance means understanding you need to direct with affection, motives, and your feelings.

The same is true for all of Cluster B including Antisocial Personality Disorder.

Call them neurodivergent - so we can accommodate them. That way they aren't forced to use coping mechanisms when others around them refuse to acknowledge their needs.

For the love of god stop expecting them to conform 24/7. Stop expecting them to understand everyone else's communication skills when no one does the same for them STOP

GOSH

Like.... Can we give them accomodations now. Can we.

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letstalkaboutfandomsbaby · 10 months

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I couldn’t find your rules so I’m sorry if it isn’t ok to do requests but plsss elaborate on secret chubby chaser iida

My only rules for this blog are to be nice and have a good time 💕

CW: chubby fem reader, "fat" used in a nonderogatory way, mentions of porn and masturbating, Iida is emotionally underdeveloped and doesn't realize that liking big girls is a normal thing

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Okok but listen. Imagine Tenya Iida growing up thinking he has to fit a certain mold. His family has expectations for him and he wants to meet those expectations, including those that they have for relationships. His family never specifies what kind of partner they want for him, but based on his observations with media, he believes that he's supposed to find and pursue a certain type of girl. Based on movies, books, TV, etc, Iida has come to the conclusion that he needs to pursue a skinny girl, because that's what all the love interests look like in the media he consumes.

But Iida finds himself drawn to other women, women with soft bodies, curves, ones with plush arms and legs and tummies. He thinks he's weird for liking fat women since the only time he's seen them in media is in a negative context, he thinks he's abnormal for liking bigger women. I mean, big women are a porn category, not people you settle down and have a life with... right?

He thinks he has a fetish for plus size women because he's never been taught that his attraction for bigger people is normal regardless of how they look like. So, he keeps his feelings a secret, indulging in porn of larger women but never going out of his way to date bigger women. He dates a few women, all fit and skinny, but he doesn't find himself attracted to these women. He thinks all of this is normal for a long time.

Oh but then he meets you. He saves you from a villain and carries you to the medic and oh god, you're so soft, so warm, so plump and squishy, he wants to melt into you and sleep for a thousand years. He somehow gets your number, maybe because you bonded over something, but you keep in contact after the attack.

Iida starts having a crisis. He likes you: you're brilliant, funny, cute, gorgeous beyond compare, but he's worried he just wants to fuck you. His only experience with plus size women has been one sided through porn, he genuinely does not know how to approach you or gain your favor. Be patient with him because he will fumble for a long time, he just doesn't know what to do.

I imagine he still casually dates a few women, none of which look like you, because he's trying to train himself to like "normal" women, but he just can't. No matter how hard he tries, he can't get you out of his head. He's even started masturbating to the thought of you and he feels like such a perv because of it, but he can't help himself. To him, you're walking temptation, your curves making him go crazy. He wants to touch you, to kiss you, to treat you like a queen, but he thinks he's expected to like other women so he thinks he can't have you! He is a stupid stupid guy sksksk

You'll probably have to make the first move, because knowing him, he'll never approach you first. He will be confused but overjoyed, agreeing to whatever you want to do for your first date. He'll be stiff and awkward because he's not sure what to do, but just give him time. Eventually he will get the hang of things and initiate holding your hand, putting his arm around your shoulders or waist, he'll even kiss your hand after a date! He'll become more comfortable as time goes on so expect him to get more and more confident.

It will take him a long time to accept his feelings for you as normal because he doesn't know any better. Please don't hold it against him. He will never treat you bad or hide your relationship, but he will voice his concerns that his family won't accept you (this isn't true, he just assumes this) which may make you feel bad. I can see things getting a little angsty at some points because you may think he doesn't fully accept you as a partner. But he does, he just doesn't know how to show it. You two probably have a big fight about it and you leave him and he shows up at your door like a sad wet kitten and you take him back when he tells you that he made dinner reservations to introduce you to his family. Then it's happily ever after from then on sksksk

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#ask #smut #☀️ asks #tenya iida #chubby fem reader #chubby reader #this ending feels abrupt 😬 my bad

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linnorabeifong · 5 months

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I Physically Can’t Get This Idea Out of My Head

How many people actually know Lin got her scars from Su ? I was rewatching the Zafou episodes and I don’t think Lin ever explicitly mentioned Su giving her the scars. So none of the krew knows. So I get why her anger doesn’t look justified to them and why they would pressure her to make up without that context. But I so badly want them to discover it. I want to see their reactions . I want them to see photos of Lin before she was scarred. How would their perceptions of Su and Lin change ? Would they be more empathetic towards Lin ?

Additionally I don’t think Su’s kids know the truth. Opal really loves her aunt I imagine she would be quite angry if she found out and while Lin’s bond with her nephews isn’t explored in the show ( which it should’ve been I want to see her play power disk with Wei and Wing, and praise Huan’s art and have a heart to heart with Baatar) I think they’re also attached to her and would be upset.

Further how about the air kids, Lin seems quite close to them and they’re all very curious. They’ve probably asked her several times before. Did she lie to them to protect her sister ? Does she give up and tell the truth one day ?

How about Kya, Bumi and Izumi ? Were any of them actually there when it all went down ? Did she tell them ? ( I don’t think she would it seems painful for her to talk about ) How would they react to the truth thirty years later?

Also I think Toph has the capacity for empathy. I think she’s ignorant to the full extent of Lin’s injury and that’s why she was so apathetic about it and just wants to move on. She’s blind. She never saw the bandages or saw how deep the scars ran, how large they were but if she did would she have acted differently? I think so. Sure she’s neglectful but she’s not a monster. If she actually felt the scars I think she would’ve comforted her daughter. She would’ve been more mad at Su. In her eyes Lin has a little scratch and Su was an accomplice in a crime. So if course she thinks Lin is overreacting. In her eyes sending Su away for being an accomplice is a crime is proportional to the harm done. She thinks Lin’s anger is just her being a square and normal sibling bickering. If she knew the whole truth maybe she would’ve punished Su more and made her make it up to Lin somehow.

( does she even know that Lin has a scar afterwards? Does anyone mention them in front of her ?)

and Lin would never let anyone touch her scars ever so how is Toph supposed to understand? How can she without feeling them ?

More thoughts about Toph: Raising both of the girls while being blind must’ve been difficult. Think about it she can’t see if their clothes get stained, can’t see if they have a bruise or see if they’re crying. So much of communication and understanding is nonverbal. She misses out on so many social cues and so much visual information. On top of being blind both her and Lin dislike physical affection.So all they really have left is verbal communication and both of them are too emotionally stunted and prone to bottling things up to ever say what they need to. Let’s be honest Toph isn’t a great listener either so she probably doesn’t fully realize/respond to what Lin is trying to say. Lin may be better at writing out or drawing her emotions but Toph wouldn’t be able to read what she wrote or see her visual work. Lin would have to learn braille and sit down and write in it to get her mother to understand which I honestly don’t believe she has the patience or desire to do. Nor do I believe Toph has the patience or desire to sit down and read all of that. ( Does Toph know braille ?) They can’t communicate with each other properly. There are so many barriers. Of course their relationship is strained. While it may not be wholly Toph’s fault it has produced a huge impact on both of her daughters that none of them can address.

An epiphany : LIN IS A SILENT CRIER. She doesn’t sob. Are you following me? Rewatch the Zafou episode if you don’t believe me . Nonverbal - audio communication ( I don’t know if there’s an actual word for this) doesn’t happen between them. Lin isn’t vocally expressive. She doesn’t cry out loud or scream or make any other vocalizations when she is in physical or emotional pain. She may grunt in some of the fight scenes but she isn’t loud. Think about when she got her bending taken. Probably one of the most physically and emotionally painful moments of her entire life. In that scene she didn’t make a single sound. Or the reverse she got her bending restored a huge moment of relief she didn’t laugh or make any other sounds of joy. She just thanked Korra. Lin is silent . Toph can’t hear her.

In conclusion communication is everything and everyone of them needs therapy.

#legend of korra #lin beifong #fan theory #toph beifong

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snowy-equinox · 1 month

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Revisiting Rahdue's Wheel

Rahdue’s Wheel is a much-larger-than-average tarot spread that originated from Eileen Connolly’s 1987 book, Tarot: The Handbook for the Journeyman. It’s difficult to find detailed information outside of the book, as its size makes it unpopular among most tarot readers. Hell, Connolly herself needs 28 pages to explain it all. Rahdue’s Wheel shows up occasionally on Tumblr or Reddit, but its reputation has mostly become a kind of “Eat the Pig Trough and Get Your Picture on the Wall” for diviners.

It’s when you get past the size that you start to realize the spread itself has some problems.

Tackling the ‘Size’ Premise

Let’s get the premise out of the way: Rahdue’s Wheel does not use all 78 cards. When you look at the spread in detail, it’s broken down into 7 sections:

Inner Wheel - Present

Center Wheel - Future

Outer Wheel - Past

Dagim Block - Past life

Taleh Pillar (right side) - Past life relationships

Shor Pillar (left side) - Past life memories/experiences

Malkuth Block - Answers the 9 questions you are supposed to have asked before the reading

The last section, the Malkuth Block, is optional. Even if you choose to use it, you may not pull the rest of your deck. Connolly says “Any cards that have not been used are left face down and are not to be read. They do not pertain to the reading and leaving them face down retains the original energy of the spread. If you turn them over, you break the esoteric structure of the entire spread.” At most, this spread requires 69 cards, not 78.

The Popular Criticisms

While its gimmick is an exaggeration, it is still a behemoth of a spread. Many believe it is unwieldy and bogged down with too much information. This is a common criticism of larger spreads; the more information you pull, the easier it is to get lost. The continual energy drain of pulling, followed by the mental drain of interpreting, can leave you with inaccurate results.

However, this is assuming that you have to do your tarot readings in one sitting. I don’t hold with that idea. You can take on the Wheel in parts, doing a section a day for a week. Or, you can pull all the cards one day, write down what you got, and then do the interpreting the next day. Personally, I think if you have the time, dedication, and skill to parse through all the information, you should be able to get good information out of a large reading.

The Information

In my opinion, Rahdue’s Wheel’s failure is not due to its size, but the quality of information it gives you.

While I approached this spread with the assumption that most people will read it for themselves, Connolly goes back and forth on the role of her readers. In most of the section dedicated to Rahdue’s Wheel, she talks exclusively about “the client”, implying she is writing for a professional tarot reader and the reading is meant to be between two people (reader & querent). However, at one point, she advises the reader to do the Rahdue’s Wheel for themself four times a year, and there are a couple of “for yourself or the client”’s sprinkled throughout the section.

I bring this up because this spread is not very good if you’re reading for yourself. The three wheels are the exact same questions; the only thing that changes is the tense. I know what my current health concerns are, and likely I know what my past ones were. The entire past wheel is redundant, as you’re just reliving everything without added context or commentary. Pulling a Three of Swords for past relationships tells me a break-up really hurt me, but it doesn’t tell me how that’s still affecting me. There’s no new information given to the querent beyond “this is how your life and philosophies have changed”.

The redundancy cuts both ways in the reader/querent question. If you read for yourself, you’re wasting time and energy on things you already know. On the other hand, if you’re reading for someone else, you’re not giving the querent new information that can solve their problems. If anything, it’s spiritual junk food; the reader gets to come off as intuitive and knowledgeable (assuming the cards are all accurate), while not giving any real advice. The querent will leave feeling fulfilled from their amazing connection with the reader without any new ideas on how to fix their situation.

The Past Life Issue

The other issue that becomes apparent right away is the focus on past lives. The wheels total 39 cards, while the past life sections total 30. This makes the past lives sections nearly half of the spread. Connolly believes that our actions and mindsets are influenced by the hidden memories and traumas of our past lives. She rationalizes that knowing about these lives is a good way to look deeper into the querent’s psychology. This gives us context for the previous problem: The reason we’re looking at every aspect of a person’s life is to find patterns stemming from the past lives. If we find your past life was betrayed by a lover, we know the root cause of your commitment issues. The wheels and the past lives sections work together to illuminate the overarching themes of the querent’s karmic life.

This creates multiple barriers in order to make this spread work:

You must believe in past lives as a concept

You must believe you personally have at least one past life

You must believe that issues from your past life can affect your current life

If you have all three beliefs, then this spread can do amazing things for you! But many people don’t have all three. I can’t get past the third one myself; I think it’s possible to connect with and learn from your past lives, but I don’t think their traumas become ours. For many, they don’t have the necessary beliefs to bridge the gap between the two halves of the spread.

Even if you do believe past lives can affect our current lives, this spread still runs into the problem we discussed earlier: there is no advice given. At best, the reader will probably say to do “past life work” before sending you on your way. Knowing where your issues stem from can be helpful, but the knowledge itself won’t change anything. Ultimately, to see change you need a direction to go in. This spread will not give that to you.

Finally Answering the Questions

Let’s revisit the Malkuth Block, the tarot reading within the tarot reading. Once the diviner has exhausted themselves sorting through every facet of your lives (present and past), it’s time to actually answer those questions you had that brought you to a reader in the first place. Connolly leaves it up to the reader to determine how many cards should be pulled per question. As I mentioned earlier, she says not every card will be flipped over and read, but then she goes on to say that if the querent only has one question, you must read all 9 cards in the Block. She does not give an explanation for this; I assume something to do with the “esoteric structure” but who knows.

At this point, you’re doing a basic tarot reading. Surprisingly, many tarot readers are able to do “here’s the answer to your question” readings without knowing every single thing about you. If you’re just trying to get questions answered, the majority of this spread is unnecessary. It’s also incredibly damaging; by putting the questions at the end of the marathon spread, you get to the important part of the reading when the diviner is exhausted.

Conclusion

Rahdue’s Wheel works well for very specific situations, like when you want to do past life work and don’t know what to focus on. But for the average reader this spread is too bloated. Not only is the size too large for most people to read accurately in one sitting, but the information it gives you is useless. You’re better off finding a smaller spread.

While some use Rahdue’s Wheel as practice, I think most people bookmark it purely as a challenge spread to do “some day”. But this spread does work if you use it within the beliefs and framework Connolly created it for. I would bet there are a lot of people out there looking for just this kind of spread to help them with their past lives. They’ve probably heard the name before, but pass over it because no one talks about it as a past life spread or a karmic spread. They only talk about it as “The Ultimate Spread”. It’s become clickbait, in tarot form.

#rahdue's wheel #tarot #tarot readings #tarot spread #divination

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eternal-honeyy · 3 months

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Clawing Ever Upward A Luminary Oneshot

Astarion Ancunin x fReader!

Synopsis: In Smallest Star; Unknown we learned that Tav and Astarion have spent a few accidental nights together after he's finished feeding, but what exactly does a sleepover between them entail? Well, for Astarion, much more than he initially anticipated.

Or, alternatively: How to give comfort to one who seeks it simply by being, in 700 words or less.

Note: This fic takes place within the Luminary storyline, an Astarion x f!Reader oneshot-based series that you can read here if you'd like some additional context, though this can also be read as a oneshot :)

Luminary Masterlist

Two hands reach outward into the darkness, seeking, scrambling, and grasping for purchase upon something sturdy, something to anchor on to, almost as if they belong to some drowning, floundering body being pulled beneath a heavy current.

The night is quiet, the gentle breeze and the buzzing of bugs the only sounds to be heard, and yet, Astarion's eyes flutter open, his pale eyelashes briefly brushing over his cheeks as he takes in his surroundings, seeking that which may have removed him from his trance even on a peaceful evening such as this one.

The answer to his curiosities comes in the form of a warm hand pressing against his cool chest, and of dull fingernails scraping at his skin weakly before the appendage falls away once more. At this, he sits up on his forearms, upper body rising slightly and pale skin meeting cool air as his gaze darts about his tent.

He looks down to the left of him and finds you lying there, exactly where he had last seen you before he'd slipped into his trance for the evening, that favorite spot of his upon your neck still slightly red from his most recent feeding.

Though, as much as he adores admiring the not so subtle marks made upon your flesh by his fangs, he finds his attention slipping instead to your expression, noting with no small sense of alarm the discomfort that can be found there, your nose scrunched up and your eyes squeezed shut so tightly that there's wrinkles forming around them from your efforts.

He looks around, searching for the cause of your obvious unease, eyes roving endlessly for some unseen light and ears perked for some unheard sound, when suddenly he hears you let out a whimper so pitiful that it has his undead heart lurching within his chest.

His eyes flit back toward you again, and he finds that your expression has only grown all the more tense since he had last seen it, and your hands have started to reach out into the darkness, the tips of your fingers so close to his side that he can feel the disturbed air left in their wake.

Your fearful whines have turned into choked gasps now, and as Astarion watches on, uncertainty coloring his thoughts, he realizes with a start that you must be dreaming, your "waking" hands emulating those found within your slumber as you almost certainly scrambled to find something, anything to hold onto.

He knows this feeling well, or at least thinks so, the desperation of trying to claw ones way forward, upward, against all odds, against all hope, and he feels his chest tighten at the realization that whatever frightens you so might not be so different from what horrifying fates he's suffered.

And Gods, your face is just so twisted up in fear, and the sounds you're making are so very desperate in the absolute worst way, in a way he had never hoped to hear, and before he can think he's reaching out to you, allowing your grasping hands to find purchase upon the cold and solid flesh of his forearm even as your nails dig in and your grip grows impossibly tight.

He allows you to ground yourself beside him over the next few minutes, his eyes never fully leaving your face as he waits for all of the fear that was once so present there to fade, some softened part of him needing to see your ease before he can lay down once more.

And he would never admit it, not to himself and certainly not aloud, but there is a level of comfort he had never anticipated in the feeling of your warm hands resting upon his skin, especially as your grip loosens and your wave of fear passes, leaving him with only the weight of two soft hands to serve as a reminder of what had just occurred.

And oh, what a mighty weight they bear,

What a permanent mark they leave in their wake.

#astarion x female reader #astarion x you #astarion scenario #astarion x f!tav #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #astarion x f!reader #astarion x female tav #astarion x mc

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cheapshrimpysheep · 9 months

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Taking Care of You - Younger Demon Brothers

This is the continuation of Taking Care of You - Older Demon Brothers

SUMMARY: What would a week with them taking care of you be like when you are sick? They taking turns to each take care of you for an entire day.

CHARACTERS: Younger Demon Brothers (Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub & Belphegor)

TAGS: Fluff; GN Reader, Kissing, Comfort

WORD COUNT: An average of 980 words per character. A total of 3.950 words. (in this part)

COMMENTS: This was supposed to be shorter. So much so that this was supposed to be a post with all 7 demon brothers. But I think I got too inspired and ended up writing a lot, so I decided to separate it into two parts: the first with the 3 older brothers and the second with the 4 younger brothers.

I hope you enjoy ;)

CONTEXT: This is the continuation of Taking Care of You - Older Demon Brothers

This happens in the original time line, not in the Nightbringer one. So, you live with the Brothers in the House of Lamentation.

You got too sick to go to RAD. You need to rest in your room. Fortunately, it's a human exclusive illness, which means it doesn't affect demons whatsoever. So they can take care of you without any problems. The doctor said you would have to rest for a week, so everyone will take turns taking care of you for a day.

Shortly after midnight you receive a message from Satan: “Today it's my turn to take care of you. If you need anything, even if it's in the middle of the night, just let me know. I'll stay with you all night if you need me.”

You take this chance to ask him if sleeping with you counts, and he responds to you with, "Of course. I'll bring a new book I bought that I think you'll like. I can read it to you if you want.”

A few minutes later Satan knocks on your door and you let him in. To your surprise, not only does he bring a book with him, he also has a cup of tea. He sits on the bed next to you. “I've been reading about your illness and found this tea that can help you sleep better and soothe any aches and pains you may have. Do you want to try it?”

You sit on the bed and accept the tea. Maybe it's not the kind of flavour you like the most, but after drinking it you feel more relaxed. You say that to him and he gives you a sweet smile, glad that he could help you a little.

He shows you the book he brought, it’s a book of trivia. Some Devildom fun facts you can learn while listening to Satan's voice reading them to you in a voice you can fall asleep to.

You give him space to lie in bed with you, and he pulls his arm away so you can lay your head on his chest. He'll use one hand (and if necessary a little magic) to hold the book and turn the pages, while stroking your head with the other. You wish you could have cherished that moment longer, but being there with him was so comfortable, his hand so tender and his voice so soft, you fell asleep in no time.

When you wake up, you see him still by your side, but reading a book that wasn't that trivia one. When he feels you move and realizes you're awake, he places a bookmark you gift him in the book, closes it and sets it down. “Good morning” he says in a whisper and kisses your forehead “Did you sleep well?” You show him that you did, either in words or in murmurs as you smile at him.

You two snuggle for a bit. “Don't you want breakfast?” he asks you. You say yes, but that it’s very good to be with him like that. He chuckles “Don't worry, I can stay like this with you all day if you want. “But we should eat something. Especially you.” you agree in a murmur, he gives you one more kiss on the forehead and gets up from the bed.

He returns with a tray and the two of you sit at the table in your room. Cat face pancakes! With eyes, nose, mouth and whiskers drawn in chocolate. You tell him how cute they look and kiss him on the cheek. He kisses you on the cheek back and offers to feed you the pancake. You accept if he lets you feed him back.

He won't leave your room if he doesn't have to. If you're awake, he'll chat with you, read books with you, and watch a movie if you want. If you feel able to walk around the house, he can lead you to the Common Room where the fireplace is lit, to snuggle and cuddle with you. And he will try to attract some cats for you two to pet outside. Big chances he'll take a picture of you playing with the cats. Two of the things he loves most together!

If you need to rest and take a nap, he will stay in your room with you, sitting in a chair reading a book, right next to you. And if you let him, he will hold your hand in the meantime. Maybe he'll even ask you if you want to lay your head in his lap. And he can pet your head while you sleep. As he would do with a cat?... Maybe...

At lunch, he’ll cook for you whatever you want. And even if you want something he doesn't know how to cook yet or something complex, he won't deny your request. He will do everything possible to cook the dish you ask for. Even if he has to read and reread every cookbook he can find. Part of that is because he wants to be able to make you happy. The other part is a mixture of pride and stubbornness.

At dinner, it’s his and Asmo’s turn to swap sits at the table with the twins. And that’s okay. He already spent a whole day with you, he can give up that place by your side this time. Lucifer is on the opposite side of you and Mammon and Levi are at your feet.

At night, and before his turn ends, he returns to your room. He sits next to you on the bed. “How are you feeling?” he asks you. You tell him you feel fine, still a little sick, but fine. “I hope it was as pleasant for you to spend the day with me as it was for me to spend it with you.” You tell him it was, and he should make those cat pancakes more often. “For you, of course. But don't tell my brothers about them. I don't want to make those pancakes for anyone else, much less for them.”

“I also wanted to ask you if you would like me to read you some more from that book to help you fall asleep better.” You accept the offer, but this time he can't sleep with you because his turn is running out. So you ask if you can thank him for taking care of you that day, before you fall asleep and he leaves.

“As if I would deny such a request.” he says with a smile. You sit on the bed and kiss his lips. You feel his hands land on your face, as if he's asking you to let the kiss last a little longer.

After you break away from the kiss, you lie back down. He caress your cheek and starts reading that trivia book in that soft voice that makes you fall asleep in no time.

You wake up with a message from Asmo. It’s 00:24am. “Hi hon~ It's your darling's turn to take care of you~! If you're awake, what some company~?” You reply that now you are awake. “*shocked emoji* Did I wake you up? I'm so sorry! Please let me redeem myself. Let me treat you. I have wonderful things to help you sleep and even improve your skin. Please~?” You surrender and tell him he can come to your room.

He knocks at your door, you let him in and he walks in slowly, as if already apologizing. “Hi hon...” he speaks in his softest, cutest voice. “Sowwy~” he goes to your bed and sits next to you “I didn't want to wake you up, but I wanted so much to enjoy these twenty-four hours with you. I brought some of my skincare products. Will you let me take care of your pretty face? It's very relaxing.”

You accept his offer and settle in bed. He didn't want to make you get up to wash your face, so he used a spell he usually uses when he's feeling a little lazy. Allow him to do all your skincare in bed. He massages your face with such gentleness and care that it doesn't take long for you to fall asleep again.

When you wake up, you see Asmo sleeping next to you with an eye masks. You know he doesn't like to have his beauty sleep interrupted, but it was time to wake up and you guys need to eat breakfast. So you try to wake him up as sweetly as you can.

You whisper his name in that voice of yours that you know he loves so much. And if that's not enough, you start kissing his cheeks as well. He smiles and takes off his eye mask. He looks at you and then proceeds to attack you with kisses. As if he was thanking you for the best wake-up anyone could give him.

“Good morning~” He says, hugging you on the bed. “How do you feel, hon?”

“Loved” is what you answer him with a smile.

“Awww, you're so cute!” he kisses you again “I'm glad, but do you feel well?” You say yes, still a little sick, but fine. And hungry. “Ha ha, you sounded like Beel now. But I'm also getting hungry. I'll prepare breakfast for us.” he kisses you one more time and get out of bed.

When he returns, he brings out a tray with two plates of rainbow waffles and whipped cream hearts. “(Y/N)! Look! Didn't they look so beautiful? I made them! Am I not so beautifully talented?” The waffles really were beautiful and you tell him so. Before you eat, he asks you to take a picture with them together.

It doesn't matter if you are sick, Asmo can still make you beautiful. He'll give you a spa day at home. He'll even take you to his bathroom for a better experience. He'll use his scented candles, fill the bathtub with bubbles (you can get in in a bathing suit), put on relaxing music, and give you all the spa treatments he knows.

If you fall asleep, no problem. He probably fell asleep in the middle of all this relaxation too.

At lunch, if you feel able to walk around the house, he will take you with him to make lunch together and he will teach you how to make more beautiful dishes. And, of course, take pictures with them.

And since you feel better and the two of you are having fun cooking all those beautiful dishes, you ask Asmo if he would like to make them for dinner for all to see. “That's a great idea!” he says excitedly “We can show them the beautiful things we can do together. But, are you sure you feel well enough to do it?” You say yes, at least for now. “If you start to feel too tired just let me know, I can finish the dishes. Don't try too hard okay? You're still sick after all.”

You two surprise the others with your dinner. Everyone else starts asking about you, if you haven't tried too hard. But you assure them that you are fine and that when you feel tired, Asmo finished the dinner. They also compliment your appearance and especially your skin.

You felt able to eat in the Dining Room, so that's where everyone had dinner. No need for Mammon and Levi eat at your feet. Although Asmo started to use it to tease them and say that maybe they liking to be at your feet, say something. Mammon protests and Levi turns red as a tomato.

Before his day is over, he returns to your room. “Hi hon~ How are you? Feeling better?” You tell him that you are feeling better than you did at the start of the week, but that you’re still not fully healed. You still feel a little jaded. “This means that next week you will be healed, right?” he had a hopeful smile on his face.

You ask him if he misses you at RAD. “Of course I do! It feels like ages waiting for you to get well again. Nobody loves me like you do.” He was making puppy dog eyes at you, a mix of pity and sadness.

You tell him that. for missing you so much and taking such good care of you, he deserves a thank you kiss. His smile lights up his face and he hugs you, both of you sitting on the bed. You start by kissing his cheek, before he sulks a little, impatiently. And then you kiss his lips. It isn’t a lustful kiss, but a loving kiss, showing how much he misses you.

He is sad to have to part from kissing you, but his turn is ending. He gives you a bunch of goodnight kisses before he leaves, almost at midnight. He wanted to be with you as long as possible.

You fell asleep shortly after Asmo left your room. But you woke up a few minutes later, hungry. At that moment, you receive a message from Beel: “I came into the kitchen to get some midnight snacks. Do you want some? If you're awake.” You say yes, that you had just woken up hungry. “Okay, I'll get some more things and go to your room.”

He knocks at the door and you let him in. “I didn't wake you up did I?” he asks you, with a bunch of snacks in his arms “You know, with the message?” You say no, that in fact he even sent the right message at the right time. “I'm glad.” he smiles like a happy Shiba inu “I brought all your favourite snacks. I didn't know which one you wanted.”

With only 10% of what he brought, you were full. Beel ate the rest of the 90% of the snacks.

“Today is my day to take care of you.” he remembers “Is there anything else you need?” You take advantage of his question to ask him if he would like to sleep with you. You would sleep much better with him. He blushes a little. “I always sleep better with you by my side too. I'll just text Belphie to let him know I'm sleeping in your room. He might be worried if he can't find me anywhere.”

He texts his twin and then joins you in bed. However, the bed is a little small for the two of you. You take the liberty of snuggling up to him and resting your head on his chest. He smiles at you, he wanted to snuggle with you too. He puts his arms around you “Goodnight (Y/N)” and feeling protected by him you fall asleep in his arms.

You wake up with Beel's soft lower voice whispering your name. You open your eyes slowly and look at him, slightly sleepy, but you feel like you slept well, and enough. “Good morning” he whispers to you with a cute smile on his face. And before you could say good morning back to him, you heard a snort. His belly.

“Sorry. I'm hungry.” he apologizes, both with his words and his expression. You ask why he hasn't gone for breakfast yet if he was already hungry. “I wanted to have breakfast together with you. And I didn't want you to wake up without me by your side. You're very cute when you're sleeping, you know?”

You smile flattered and thank him for being so thoughtful of you. You tell him that he can go get breakfast for the two of you now, but remind him not to overdo your part. Despite it being Saturday, the other brothers are not at home, because they had to take care of some RAD related things at Diavolo's request.

He returns with two towers of pancakes, one in each hand, and pancake syrup in his coat pocket. He had a huge smile on his face, he loves to eat with you. “I overdid your part, didn't I?” he asks, seeing your surprised face. You say maybe, but surely they must be delicious and he can eat whatever you can't.

Unfortunately, you woke up a little nauseous from your illness, so you ate less than usual, which alarmed Beel a little. “Are the pancakes not good? Did I put too much sugar?” You tell him that he doesn't need to worry, that the pancakes are great and that you would like to eat more, but you can't at the moment because you're nauseous. “I can make more when you feel better if you want. I don't mind.” You ask if he's sure. “Of course. It’ll be hard to resist the urge to eat them right there. But it's to make you happy, so I'll do my best.” You thank him with a passionate kiss on the cheek, which makes him smile even wider. He will gladly feed you if you want.

If at any time during the day you need to get some sleep, he will respect that and not leave your room in case you need something when you wake up.

Fortunately, you feel physically better and he suggests that the two of you take a short walk around the garden to get some air, since you haven't left the house in a week. You will walk hand in hand. If you feel cold, he will give you his coat or hug you. And if you feel tired, even just a little, he will carry you back to your room if you let him.

If at lunch you want his pancakes, he'll make them, if not, he'll make whatever you feel like eating. And at dinner, the usual, since you can already eat with them at the dining room table. And at night, before his day is over, he comes back to your room.

“Your appetite returned at lunch and dinner. I'm glad.” he tells you with his cute smile “How are you feeling?” You tell him that the walk in the garden did you a lot of good, and you thank him for the idea and for taking the walk with you. His smile only grows when hearing that he helped you like that. “I'm glad you're feeling better now. I've been miss you so much.” You tell him that you felt the same way and that you were very happy to spend that day with him, only him.

“Me too. I love Belphie, and spending time with you two, but I like spending time with you like this more.” he sits with you on the bed and hugs you. You take advantage of this to cup his face and kiss him. His kiss is sweet and tender.

He'll stay there with you, holding you, until his twin brother knocks on the door shortly after midnight.

Belphie knocks on your bedroom door and Beel opens it. They talk for a while before Beel bids you both good night and leaves to go to their room.

“You're going to let me sleep with you right?” Belphie says, with that cute little brother smile he uses to get what he wants. “It's been a week since I've only seen you at dinner. And today is already my day to take care of you. So...”

You lie down, giving Belphie space to lie down next to you. As he does and hugs you like you're his favourite pillow, which you probably are. “I've been dreaming about you.” he whispers, sleepy and close to your neck “Which only makes it sadder to wake up without you with me. You really are mean doing that to me, you know?” And in an instant he falls asleep in your arms. And you in his.

When you wake up, he's still fast asleep and clinging to you. You try to wake him up, whispering his name, poking him... But he just complains in sleepy moans. “Belphie, I'm starting to get hungry.” you tell him, what makes him answer: “Then wake me up with a good morning kiss.”

You kiss his forehead, but apparently that's not enough. Then you start kissing his cheek several times until you suddenly stop. He complains lazily and you tell him you can continue after he brings breakfast. “Mmmm... Fine...” And he kisses your cheek before getting up and, somewhat reluctantly, leave your room.

Whatever was the matter at RAD, the others had to go to the Demon Lord's Castle that Sunday to finish things off. And because of that, you're alone with Belphie.

He comes back with a basic breakfast, like toast, but they taste pretty good. Even if you already feel healed, remember that we are talking about the Avatar of Sloth. So, if it's up to him, the two of you will spend all day in bed or on the sofa in the living room, just chilling and cuddling, sleeping or watching something. Or at least, that's how you spend your morning.

At lunch, knowing that you already feel practically healed, he will convince you to cook with him. Especially since cooking alone for two people is a lot more work and doing anything with you is better. At some point while you are cooking he will hug you from behind and rest his chin on your shoulder. But if you still don't feel well enough to cook, don't worry, he'll cook everything if he sees you're still not well.

Since you haven't left the House of Lamentation for a week, he asks if you'd like to spend the afternoon in the garden, under the stars (Since in the Devildoom it was always night). The weather was even nice. You agree, and Belphie gets you a picnic blanket to lie outside. In the middle of the afternoon, if you're hungry, he'll go into the house to get you two some snacks, but only after you convince him with a few kisses.

When the others arrive home, they get worried for not finding you or Belphie anywhere, until Beel decides to look in the garden and finds you two. The others start complaining about Belphie taking you outside, because if you were still sick it could be worst for you. But you explain that you already felt better and that getting some air after spending so much time in bed was doing you a lot of good. Lucifer even praises Belphie for the idea, until Belphie said that Beel had already taken a walk with you the day before which extended Lucifer's praise to him as well.

Dinner felt like the usual with the brothers, but you could tell by their good mood that everyone was very happy that it was the last day you need to stay home and rest. Everything will be back to normal the next day. Even though the next day was a Monday, they were happy.

Like the others, Belphie came to your room before his day of taking care of you was over. “Hi how are you? Completely healed, right?” he asks, and you nod “Great. So where is my compensation?” His compensation? “Yes. I was away from you for a week, I think I deserve an apology for the emotional damage. Oh! And I still took care of you all day today, you even made me wake up in the morning to bring you breakfast, I deserve a reward for that too, don't you think?”

You smile and sigh, gesturing for him to sit on the bed with you. You hug him and start kissing him on the cheek before getting to his lips. He hugs you tighter and leans over to make you lie down on the bed, as he lays down next to you.

After the kiss he continues lying down and hugging you. “You're not going to sleep here again tonight, are you?” you ask him

“Why? Don't tell me you want me to go away?” he says with sad puppy dog eyes. He knows perfectly well that your answer is no. You sigh, and snuggle into him. He gives you a few kisses on your cheek and around your neck, lazy, loving kisses, until you both fall asleep.

If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

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rhiaarrow · 2 months

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Hello, hello! The Ghostie with the penchant for long rambling walls of text here to give her unwarranted two cents on the current disagreement between the Tubblings and the Crows!

I'm offering my take as a purely unbiased outsider

(Yes, us Ghosties may be married to the Tubblings but when I first joined the Qsmp Fandom I was a Crow and a Crow only, before I died and became a Ghostie. Thus, while I like both qTubbo and qPhil I don't watch either of them often, ergo unbiased :D )

who has no real reason to attempt to villainise or place either character on a pedestal because to put it bluntly, they are not my cubito.

Without further ado I will begin my ramble.

Today's ramble of course comes with the disclaimer that with me not being a qTubbo or qPhil main there may be areas of their character that I'm not aware of since I don't watch every single one of their streams! Feel free to correct me on literally anything you think I've mischaracterized about your main just please be understanding that nothing is done with malicious intent! :)

I'm not attempting to paint either character as a villain in this ramble, I'm just publishing this in hopes to allow each community to understand that neither cubito is perfect and that's okay!

Okay! For anyone missing context; the current disagreement began when Tubblings expressed feeling happy that Chay was able to be a kid around qTubbo as opposed to being serious with qPhil then the Crows reminded the Tubblings that qTubbo is also attributing to Chay's hero complex through him acting as Chay's egg and asking Chay to protect him. Which has caused both sides to instinctively protect their cubito and is causing arguments within their communities.

As a Ghostie who is more than willing to write 1000 words to raise awareness, and is frankly sick of infighting within the QSMP fandom (it's why I left twitter, please don't bring it here 🫠) I figured I'd try to help 'squash the beef' if you will.

Polite discussions about cubito conflict is fine, going for each other's throats over character takes...yeah let's not do that! :D

Firstly, everyone has to recognize that Chayanne has an almost toxic hero complex. He's had it since the beginning of the server and while neither qPhil or qTubbo is doing it on purpose they are BOTH feeding into it!

He has an overwhelming urge to protect others with no regard for his own safety or wellbeing at times. In the beginning it only extended to eggs. As the older sibling he had a sense of responsibility over them, which was cute! But now it's borderline toxic although it's become so normalized as such a core part of Chayanne's character that no one recognizes it's no longer a healthy mindset.

Now Tubblings can make the defense that qTubbo isn't being entirely serious or that he doesn't truly expect Chay to put his life on the line for him but I watched him look Chayanne in the eyes and BLAME HIM FOR NOT PROTECTING 'HIS EGG'.

Even if that was immediately reincarnated qTubbo who was a little fucked up in the head, even if he no longer fully blames him, even if qTubbo was joking at the time, he looked that kid dead in the eyes and told him it was his fault. Tell me again how qTubbo isn't unintentionally feeding his complex?

Yes qTubbo allows Chay a more carefree space away from his overwhelming need to protect his younger sister and a space to be more relaxed.

Yes qTubbo is joking about a lot of things and a lot of the out of pocket shit he says isn't intended to be taken completely seriously.

BUT you cannot fully disagree with the Crows when they say that qTubbo feeds the complex too. BECAUSE HE DOES, JUST NOT ON PURPOSE THE SAME AS qPHIL!

qPhil is so used to his son being the strong warrior that he doesn't realize that that character trait is actively damaging his son's mental state. His attention is divided between Chay and Tallulah and since Tallulah is more open to talking about her issues he often isn't as attentive to Chay.

Is that a bad thing? Yes!

Is it intentional on qPhil's part? No!

Is it something the Crows need to recognize that qPhil does which unintentionally allows his son to continue to struggle with his hero complex? Yes!

qPhil loves his son unconditionally AND qPhil feeds Chayanne's hero complex are two statements that can and do coexist

qTubbo let's Chay be more of a child AND qTubbo feeds Chayanne's hero complex are two statements that can and do coexist

And as long as both the Crows and Tubblings are willing to understand that neither cubito is perfect and THERE'S NO USE FIGHTING OVER PIXELS then we're good!

- Sincerely a Ghostie who just wants to try to bring understanding between the two fandoms by utilizing her rambling skills!

AGAIN, any severe mischaracterization you feel I may have included is unintentional and feel free to correct anything you feel like I'm misconstruing, they're not my main cubitos so there may be somethings that qTubbo or qPhil mains find to be untrue to the source

HOWEVER if you're gonna call me out for mischaracterizing a character simply because I'm bringing up their flaws and you can't accept a character has flaws, kindly fuck right off :D

#qsmp #qsmp analysis #qsmp lore #qsmp tubbo #qsmp philza #philza #tubbo #qsmp chayanne #chayanne the egg #qsmp crit #tubbo crit #philza crit #fandom neg #fandom crit #qsmp fandom #rhia rambles

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lu-is-not-ok · 10 months

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horrid thought i had: if your theory on k corp hong lu being semi-conscious during stasis is right, does that not mirror carmen during lobotomy corporation?

...

Wait. Hold on. Wait. Wait hold on.

Ok, so here's the thing: For a while now I've already had a suspicion that Hong Lu's deal is like, way more important than he lets on.

This might sound like a conspiracy Game Theory Matpat rant, but here me out.

First of all, Hong Lu has this weird tendency to break patterns in much less obvious ways than the other suspicious Sinners, to the point it's been driving me insane?

Like.

Okay.

First.

Remember those promo PVs of each Sinner? And how each of them ended on a glimpse of their trauma and All of them either directly referenced a potentially traumatic event or had the Sinner sound distraught? Except for Hong Lu, who doesn't sound in any way distressed like the others did, and then after the game logo is revealed he asks if something he said was weird.

Like, sure, it does make sense for him to say that in context of what he says during that video, but isn't it so fucking weird that the one Sinner with a section in his promo that seems slightly off is also the one who asks if anything he said during that section was weird?

Second.

You know those intro segments during the prologue, that are also on the official limbuscompany.com website? The ones that offer managerial instructions for each Sinner?

Pay close attention to those. For every Sinner, these instructions specify how to deal with that specific Sinner's eccentricities.

Don't show Gregor your disgust. Wait for Rodya's bad mood to pass. Give Sinclair positive reinforcement. Wait patiently for Yi Sang to finish thinking. Look Ishmael's way for sound advice, but don't break her trust. Understand Heathcliff is simple-minded and contact HR if he causes problems. Play along with Don's Fixer act. Don't make Ryoshu breed personal resentment towards you. Give clear and concise commands to Meursault. Give Outis short replies of agreement but keep an eye on her. Simply nod and get it over with when conversing with Faust.

...But then there's Hong Lu's. Which says nothing how to deal with his eccentricities, but rather to not let Other Sinners get physical with him over them. It's not about keeping him in line, it's about keeping other people's reactions to him in line.

I want to note this especially because several other Sinners break patterns in their introductions as well. Meursault's is one sentence. Ryoshu and Outis have a warning. Don Quixote's particulars include a [REDACTED] on the website. Faust's directly asks the manager to fuck around and find out. However, the way Hong Lu's intro instructions break the pattern is the most subtle out of all of them, to the point I genuinely did not realize that was the case until I had read all of them over multiple times.

Third.

Hong Lu's Base E.G.O animation. If you watch all of the Base E.G.O animations in a row, you'll notice that for all of them, the Sinners start already in frame... Except for Hong Lu, who visibly jumps into the frame from off-screen.

Now, you could argue that, technically, Don runs into her animation from off-screen as well, however I think there is a bit of a difference here. Don's animation is too quick to see her actually run in. We see she's not there for maybe a frame, before she pops with an animation that implies she had just run in and needs to break her momentum. This is unlike Hong Lu's, whom we Actively See descend from Off-Screen.

Now, I know what some of you may be thinking.

That I am coping. That these are coincidences. That I'm looking too deeply into things.

However. Here's a connection that I just recently realized, that has been Fucking Me Up.

Mild spoilers for Canto IV and like the first two chapters or so of Dream of the Red Chamber, if anyone cares.

You know how Limbus Company has this... fixation on stars? There's the whole thing with Dante following a star, stars granting wishes, people turning into weird beings from wishing to be stars, and there's this general connection to the sky and space because of Demian also doubling as a reference to The Little Prince.

And then something weird hit me.

See, Dream of the Red Chamber starts with a bit of a backstory to the jade that would later be reincarnated into Bao-yu. You see, it was one of the many stones used by a godess to create the sky. However, this one specific jadestone ended up being the only one not used in that creation, which then led to it feeling horrible about itself, which then led to a monk and a taoist deciding to have that stone reincarnate as a human and live through a human life, kickstarting the rest of the novel.

I'm like, heavily simplifying this, but that's the gist of how that whole thing starts.

Which. Made me think. A jadestone that was part of the ones meant to build the sky, but ended up being left unused. The sky. Stars. Hong Lu being seemingly named after the jade rather than Bao-yu directly.

Holy shit there's no way they won't reference this in some way, right? Right?

So, now imagine me, at my fucking wit's end, having the biggest crackpot theory brewing in my mind.

And you send this ask comparing K Corp Hong Lu to Carmen.

I am going insane.

#limbus company #limbus company project moon #hong lu #hong lu lcb #lcb analysis #lcb speculation #lcb canto iv #lcb spoilers #ask #mulberriesandtea #lu speaketh #no i'm not normal thanks for asking

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