#wanted to dive into some poetry and then ending up thinking about them

[arminsumi]

I want to kiss you / キスしたい

G. Satoru

NOTE: i recently started learning to write in japanese for not much reason other than to occupy my mind with something new. this little daydream came to me and i can't stop thinking about it, i think falling in love despite a language barrier is one of the purest and sweetest ways to fall in love.

WARNINGS — it might be fem reader idk, kissing 👍, ur married w him at the end, not proofread lol i'm snuggled up in bed ok

Satoru cant speak english and you cant speak japanese; Suguru is the translator friend. You met him online years ago, who knows how. But you hit it off, and four years of friendship rolled by.

Satoru heard all about Y/n and saw you many times when Suguru facetimed or called you. You and him had many cute, playful interactions, ranging from making hearthands at each other to flipping each other off and laughing about it. Sometimes Satoru would be sat off-camera, overloading Suguru with things to translate, because he had a lot to say to you. One time, Suguru left for a few minutes to get a pizza delivery, and then Satoru got very quiet and the two of you blinked at your screens.

"Hi."

"Hi."

And then you two for some reason started laughing with your whole chests, Suguru walked in with a confused smirk. He joked, "Sooo... what did you and Satoru talk about while I was gone?" He asked, gentle accent coming through in soft waves. "The mysteries of the universe." You replied. Satoru was already diving into the pizza box, but he still listened to you speak; he wondered what you had said, maybe you used some fancy words to say that you liked him? He'd be lying if he said he didn't memorize variations of "i like you" after that. He was paranoid that he could miss you saying that you liked him.

You managed a slow, meticulously-pronounced nice to meet you in Japanese when you finally visited Tokyo. It was at the airport. You and Suguru had shared many hugs — good grief, you'd seen height comparisons many times but none painted a real idea of just how big these boys were. But Satoru? He was loudmouthed on a screen and surprisingly shy in person. Eventually he hugged you and didn't let go. He even got so comfy as to hang and cling to your body like you saw him doing with Suguru in countless photos and videos.

Though you could barely pronounce the little Japanese that you picked up, Satoru felt giddy to hear your pretty voice in his language. He listened to you like you were reciting love poetry to him, fists under his chin and eyes starry. But you were just saying basic phrases, boring things — nothing that articulated your thoughts properly.

He was far too embarrassed to try and speak any English when he first met you, even though after developing a crush on you he did start learning some English on the side. He knew quite a bit, but listening was so impossibly difficult it frustrated him like nothing else. He was also self-conscious of his English accent, though Suguru tried to assure him that he sounded very cute and almost oddly British.

So often instead of attempting to speak tiny phrases to you, Satoru threw a lot of hand motions and signals your way which got the two of you and Suguru laughing — poor Sugie, he was always translating even the smallest things you said even if you muttered them under your breath, because Satoru was eager to know every little thought and expression you had, even if you were simply commenting on the weather.

Once you commented that it was so hot, you were visiting during a heatwave-filled summer. Satoru raised his brows at Suguru expectantly, and you heard a familiar translation;

暑い。

It's hot.

There was such a frustrating language barrier between the two of you, it became more evident when you had finally flown over the sea to meet them.

Yet you and satoru fell in love silently and beautifully, your love flowing like a river in the most unexpected directions. You felt his affection emanating from his irises. You and him joked around, and talked — though you had no idea what the other meant most of the time. Sometimes the two of you gave up and you talked in English, he responded with Japanese, and it went on like that very comedically until Suguru came back to bridge the gap.

Lots of time was spent putting your heads together over your phone, reading translations of what you wanted to say to each other.

One day, when Suguru left the two of you alone in his apartment kitchen so that he could hop to the convenience store, Satoru typed something into the translator and let you read it. Your face warmed up.

キスしたい。

I want to kiss you.

He looks at you expectantly.

You type back to him.

Then kiss me.

それからキスして。

He blushed and hesistated, the two of you making electric eye contact for a while before he boyishly pecked your lips to test if you liked his kiss, but oh that's all the two of you needed to realize just how much you liked each other. You melted into each other like your bodies were made for nothing else but to embrace and be one. He shook a little, tentatively gliding his lips over yours. His hands nervously cupped your cheeks. With the way he handled you so carefully, you'd think you were made of porcelain.

Your reciprocation meant everything to him. His confidence flourished. The soft smacking, wet sounds got louder when he kissed you more passionately. Those gentle hands found their way to the back of your neck, and he softly pressed you closer to him as if he was scared you would pull away. What if you changed your mind mid-kiss? He was overthinking and you wouldn't have even guessed it, because you thought he was in the same blissed out dream state as you were. So high on kissing that the world fell away.

The two of you started smiling embarrassedly, grinning so hard that you couldn't continue kissing. Then the two of you just giggled against each other's faces — a subconscious realization swept him; laughter and kissing are their own languages.

Yes as years passed and you visited time and time again, your Japanese improved and his English improved. When you moved to Japan, eventually you adopted a messy mix of Japanese and English with Satoru. He liked showing off how perfectly he could pronounce things, and you liked showing off that you could write very neat kana.

Years and years and years passed and when you and him were married in your own little apartment, starting a life together, a very fluent Satoru reminisced about how the two of you fell in love despite barely speaking to each other.

"It was your eyes for me." You said.

"Oh really? It was your voice for me. I didn't know what you were saying, but it sounded nice." He said.

"Mmm I liked your voice, too." You said, snuggling your head on his shoulder. He basked in the attention, though it was common, it always felt special for him. The smallest hand touches and wrist kisses made his heart lurch.

"Remember when I always nagged Suguru to translate every little thing you said?"

"Yeah, you worked him to the bone." You chuckled.

"I just wanted to know what you were saying. I had such a crush on you, looking back now it was even ridiculous how much I liked you considering the barrier and all."

"Ooh, did you?"

"How is this surprising? We're married??"

"Oh yeah."

#🗑️ — trash #♥️ 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔 — 五条悟 #gojo #gojo satoru #fluff #gojo fluff #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x fem reader #satoru x reader #gojou satoru x reader #jjk gojo #satoru gojo

[mossymandibles]

How did Kraw's mom and dad meet? What drew them together? What was their relationship like? What did they talk about? Wait, did she even speak the same language as him? She seems pretty wild and solitary from what we've seen of her...

I haven’t honestly thought about languages and linguistics yet, if I ever do. It seems very daunting and I don’t have the brain power for it right now. For a sort of lazy aside I’d like to think the primordials have some form of common tongue that they all understand, idk what to call it yet though.

Yuna ended up solitary but she used to have a pod/matriline where she stayed with her own mother, brothers and sisters and their families. Their hierarchies are kind of like most whales. She wasn’t able to have calves of her own because of a faulty uterus but she would often help hunt for the pod, at times helping the calves of other mothers in her pod, or protecting the pod from any threats, proving herself to be very ruthless when it came to anything threatening her family.

She met Sobehk much later in life, when he found her on his wanderings after being exiled from his Rook on Zenith.

He was a prince but most found him strange, a romantic somewhat detached from reality, even somewhat immature and full of himself. His mother, the matriarch/Empress, found him to be a bit of a disappointment in terms of running things. He didn’t express any type of desire to learn politics. If he wasn’t showing off his fighting skills He would often wander off on long flights by himself, exploring or…writing very bad poetry.

He had developed a sort of obsession/fixation with the ocean. He definitely feared it, but felt drawn to what was down there because of an experience he had happening upon a leviathan in the throes of death, lying on the shore of an islet. He would spend hours looking across shorelines in search of anything that would wash up, any indication of answers for his burning curiosity.

He’d never seen a creature like Yuna before, only hearing stories about sea serpents and drakes at the edges of the world.

She was in the midst fending off two ‘whaling’ boats(merhunters/poachers), unable to dive away from them as they had several harpoons hooked into her side. She seemed to be fine on her own but Sobehk took it upon himself to help her, raking through the two boats like they were paper. Yuna didn’t stay to say thank you, but instead swam away to the nearest shore she could find, leaving a foamy trail of blood in the water. Sobehk ended up following her. She thought he was looking to pick her apart once she was dead.

He actually did think she was feral at first. He mostly wanted to observe, finding her to be graceful as well as beautiful.

Yuna, of course, was snarling and snapping the moment he decided to approach her, calling him a vulture and telling him to fuck off. (Sea drakes don’t especially care for Furies or other flyers.)

Finding out she could talk, he became even more enamored and interested and was determined to help her despite her reservations. He felt that “something as beautiful as her shouldn’t die like a hunted fox at the hands of whalers and their rusty harpoons” in his own words.

She was amused by this, and told him if he could fetch a specific kind of blood clotting kelp for her she would allow him to help. Even more amusing to her was finding out Sobehk was essentially afraid to go into the ocean despite his professed love of it.

Since they were closer to some populated islands, he ended up taking a fungal nymph doctor hostage from a nearby island village, close to where Yuna’s sea cave was. He was able to help Yuna and safely cut out the harpoons albeit nearly shitting himself the entire time.

During her recovery she stayed in her sea cave. Sobhek continued to hang around and made the mistake of impeding on her territory. There were several time that she actively tried to kill him when he would hunt for her and bring her live fish he stole from fishermen nets. Even in her weakened state she came very close to biting his head off. She distrusted him but Sobehk still seemed determined to help. Eventually he would leave the fish at the mouth of the cave and wait, safely perched nearby where he could still speak to her without being swiped or snapped at. He realized she just wanted her space/privacy. Long story short, during her recovery, Yuna eventually began to find Sobehk’s presence tolerable, realizing it was nice to have someone to converse with after so many years of keeping to herself. Where he was such a different archetype to her, she found it somewhat entertaining. His insistence to adorn and flatter her was a change of pace for sure. She did not care to be fawned over.

Yuna had never really had any lovers. Most prospects would end up avoiding her because she couldn’t bear any young and seemed cold/short tempered. After a few miscarries she would end up forgetting the whole mating thing altogether, finding it draining and redundant. I’d say her relationship with Sohbek was a sign of her settling down tbh, not that she didn’t end up caring for him in the end ofc.

I’d say they would mostly talk about their past lives, their separate cultures etc. Sobehk had thought sea drakes were just wild beasts so he was very interested to learn about her, even if she seemed reluctant to talk about herself. He would often ask tons of questions about what it was like whenever she’d make dives for hunting. (which is coincidentally what non-aquatic partners would ask Kraw a lot) the ocean was another world to him.

It wouldn’t be until towards the end of their relationship that he’d bring up eating the celestial’s flesh. Then things kind of ehhhh. Went to shit ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

But hey, then comes Kraw.

I’ve wanted to draw out their meeting for a while but you know how that goes. Here’s a wip of one of the pages. I’ve been having fun drawing Yuna’s expressions and such.

He’s so smitten over this giant mean dragon lady. “You come from the ocean?? I’m a HUGE fan.”

#asks #yuna #sobehk #lore #wahoo! lopsided romance #i get it’s probably tropey but idc #I’ve been starting to design Yuna with more seal-like features because it makes sense to me #its not as visible in this page tho

[annlillyjose]

WRITEBLR REINTRO – ANN LILLY JOSE

hello there!

following through with my tradition of posting a new writeblr intro every single year, here we go – a brand new reintro where i talk a little bit about myself and my current writing projects. so, here we go, onto all that good stuff!

about me

i'm ann, a twenty-year-old writer from kerala, currently based in kochi

i live with my husband, who is a musician, and lead a very creative life of sorts

i'm an infp, enneagram type 2

i write literary fiction and poetry

i'm a discovery writer and have a thing for sad stories with traumatised characters

i work as a content writer and social media manager for a wedding company

you can find all my published work on my linktree

my aesthetics: wilted flowers, fallen leaves, silhouettes, shadows, gentle friendships, indie music, unplanned trips, birds, fireflies, annotated books, old libraries and buildings, post-colonial literature, voids, romance

my wips

i recently finished a litfic novel called dairy whiskey and am editing it right now, hoping to get it ready for agent submissions in a month or two. i put my heart and soul and blood and bones into it, so if you’d like to dive into the story and read a few excerpts, you can check out the intro here and every other excerpt here!

rock salt is my main wip since finishing dairy whiskey. it is the story of identical twins rain and norah as they move out for college and navigate their lives on their own, which ends up in them growing apart. if you like complicated sibling relationships and the struggles of growing up, you’ll love this book!

i so badly want to start writing it, but i don’t think i’ll be able to until dairy whiskey is in a more secure position. so, there probably won’t be any updates for a few months, but you can read the wip intro here.

this is a gay vignette novel that i started writing back in 2021 as a source of personal joy. this is the story of how a singer-songwriter desperate for normalcy meets a boy with a heart heavy with guilt. this is the story of how they fall in love and it’s honestly quite wholesome <3

i haven’t worked on this book in so long and i’ve been trying to sneak some words in, but it feels like the book needs a fresh start. i don’t know, i just might start it all over again. but until then, here’s an outdated wip intro.

green room is a literary/experimental memoir documenting my teenage years as a writer. it is a deep dive into craft and how it affects life, particularly how it moulds you as a person. i haven’t started drafting this yet, but here’s a wip intro for now.

so, that’s about it!

if you’d like to be pinged when i drop a new publication or a wip update, just send me an ask to be added to my general taglist and i’ll tag you in those posts.

thank you so much for reading. i hope writing has been going well for you. if not, here’s some strength, some kindness, and some caffeine to keep going!

– love, ann.

general taglist (ask to be added or removed)

@shaonsim @heartfullkings @vnsmiles @dallonwrites @wannabeauthorclive @sienna-writes @violetpeso @flip-phones @silassghost @ambidextrousarcher @zoe-louvre @writing-with-l @magic-is-something-we-create @femmeniism @frozenstillicide @wizardfromthesea @rose-bookblood @coffeeandcalligraphy @rodentwrites @saltwaterbells @snehithiye @at-thezenith @subtlefires

#writeblr reintro #writeblr reintroduction #writeblr intro #writeblr #writer on Tumblr #literary fiction writer #my wips #my writing projects #navigation page #aljwrites

[fereldanwench]

Questions for Writers

I was tagged by @corpocyborg! Thank you, bb!! ♡

Last book I read: I still haven't finished There's No Such Thing as an Easy Job Kikuko Tsumura I started back in January, lmao. Not for any reason other than I just haven't been in the right headspace to sit down and read for the past few months--What I have read of it is great, so hopefully, I can make the time to pick it up again.

Greatest literary inspirations: I like the female protags in Karin Slaughter novels, and I love Tanya Huff's Torin Kerr from her Confederation series--I'm sure they've inspired me on some level. Oh, and Phedre from Jacqueline Carey's Kushiel books, too, although it's been ages since I read those. But I think most of my inspiration actually comes from other forms of media. I love the action babes of the late 90s/early 00s: Lara Croft is the number one inspo here, and pretty much all of Michael Turner's comic girls but especially Sara from Witchblade. And I think Better Call Saul is easily one of the best-written shows ever made--That's one I always go back to when I feel like I need to refill the inspo well.

Things in my current fandoms I want to read but I don't want to write: I have a confession: I usually only read a ton of fic when I first get into a fandom and I can't get enough and I just want to soak it all up, but after a certain point, I just don't have a lot of headspace for other people's stories. 😬 I feel bad about it sometimes, and it's not like I never read anything after that point, but 90% of the time, what I wanna write is what I wanna read. It's kind of a closed loop, I guess.

Things in my current fandoms I want to write but I think nobody would be interested in them but me: Well, I'm not at all deterred by being the only person interested in something I write, haha. One of my favorite one-shots I've ever written is between my Cousland and Hawke meeting briefly at Ostagar, and it's probably my least popular fic on AO3 by a big margin. But I do like deep-diving into my own OCs, and it generally is harder to get an audience for fic that doesn't have canon characters. Ain't gonna stop me, though!

You can recognize my writing by: Lots of pining and banter; obvious thesaurus abuse

My most controversial take (current fandom): Yeah, no, not gonna be sharing my actual most controversial takes, lmao.

But I do also love the Devil ending! I don't think there's one objectively "best" ending--What's good for one V isn't necessarily good for another--But for my Valerie, it suited her story the best. I love the poetry of her going back to Arasaka after getting fired by them, I love storming Arasaka Tower with Goro, I love the conflict with Johnny, I love making Goro confront how fucked up the Arasakas are, I love the possibilities of Mikoshi--The only way it would have been better for me is if this nixed idea had actually been put into action.

And I wish we could roleplay a V that is actually more "pro"-corpo in the game, especially if we had the corpo lifepath. Sticking it to the man is sexy and all, but I just love delving into characters that align themselves with shitty institutions and exploring different motivations (I personally like cynical pragmatism/self-preservation and delusional idealism) that lead a person there.

Top three favorite tropes: 1) Rivals to friends to lovers 2) Mutual pining 3) Forced proximity

What’s your current writing mood (10 – super motivated and churning out words like crazy, 0 – in a complete rut): Like, 0.5, lmao. I've been rereading and organizing my WIPS, so there's some effort being put in there, but I'm very much in one of my "ummmm, how do I even write fiction?" phases.

Share a random frustration: I have ZERO discipline when it comes to writing. I need to be in a fully feral, totally isolated from distractions place or I just can't get shit done. When I'm in the zone, I'm in the fuckin' zone, but I get like 3 months of that every 5 years, lmao.

Tagging (with no pressure, as always) @ur-friendly-nbhd-cardassian, @dread-red-queen, @vorchagirl, and @aceghosts <333

#t: wench.txt #tumblr: dash games

[ostrichmonkey-games]

Fractal Romance Design Dive

Finally writing about Fractal Romance!

Fractal Romance began life as an entry for the Record Collection Jam, inspired by the album Swimmer by Tennis (still one of my all time favorite albums). At the time, I wanted to try my hand at some rough Belonging Outside Belonging style design - and Fractal Romance is what ended up emerging from that experiment!

One of my favorite things about BOB (and/or No Dice No Masters) design is the use of different tokens to activate moves, rather than relying on dice rolls and bonuses. To summarize the gist of it, to use Strong Moves you have to spend tokens, and when you use Weak Moves you gain tokens. There are also sometimes Neutral Moves, which are things your playbook/character can always do.

This token economy, move, and playbook design was really the focus in Fractal Romance. Mechanics like setting elements I ended up playing around with in other projects like Extracausal: Monolith.

I also wanted to experiment with different "procedural elements" - or as I consider them, game mechanics that rely on some level of random procedural generation (great examples are dungeon crawls based on random tables, or the faction/heat/entanglements mechanics in Blades in the Dark). There wasn't going to be any dice in Fractal Romance, so I decided on another pretty standard procedural tool: playing cards.

This decision also gave me a great token to use - the cards themselves. Players would gain cards by making Weak Moves and spend cards to use Strong Moves. Cards are also used to randomly generate the setting of the game, the Fractal Palace - an infinite and abstract environment (but we'll get to tone and aesthetic a little later). So in addition to spending cards to make Strong Moves, cards could be played from your hand to generate the rooms you travel through, the NPCs you encounter, and to manifest solutions to obstacles.

This forms the mechanical backbone of the game. Wander around, see what you find, spend your cards and gain new cards.

So what is the game actually about? I call it a "surreal hangout" because that's what it is. It's as much a game to play, as it is an excuse to chill out somewhere weird with your friends. The main "goal" or "motivation" of the player characters is to learn more about yourself through experiencing the Fractal Palace.

Players take on different Forms aka playbooks. There's nothing explicit about what each Form is about, but the way they're written let players fill in that space themselves, with, what I think is minimal effort.

The Forms are relatively simple, and writing them was really more about channeling the vibe of the album (each Form is roughly based on a particular song, but I don't remember which is which woops). Mechanically, there's not a ton I can say about my approach to writing them! It was as much poetry as it was game design. Sometimes you just have to write something and see what emerges.

It took some noodling on word choice (and having Swimmer on on repeat) to create the different Forms. For the moves, it was about balancing metaphor and poetry with something that still feels tangible enough to actually do.

The Fractal Palace, players' Forms, and the various denizens of the palace have been described as vaporwave-adjacent and compared to the aesthetic of Paradise Killer, which is kind of the goal. I wanted to create a slightly neon, hazy, misty, and strange setting for the game so mission accomplished.

Remember how you can use cards in your hand to create rooms of the Fractal Palace and the denizens that live their? Here's how that works;

Each suit in the deck as a set of moves that either can happen within a Room or be performed by a denizen.

Each card value (faces and numerals) have a set of tones and aesthetics that can be attributed to that Room or Denizen.

Each specific card in the deck also has its own individual aesthetic.

Put together multiple cards and you end up with a fully fleshed out Room or Denizen.

Here's some examples of what that can create;

A soft glow from flickering overhead lamps that swing in a source less breeze. A phone rings in a booth filled with teal potted plants. Someone sits in a red diner booth across the room. White marble floor is run with gold veins. The ceiling fades into infinity above. A fountain burbles with splashes of tie-dye color. Jack of Diamonds: white suit, head is a moth, wears gloves • Wants; interesting conversation • Needs; lasting relationships • Fears; losing themself when opening up Queen of Clubs: alabaster skull, black glass crown, Hawaiian shirt • Wants; new experiences, new perceptions • Needs; to really see their reflection • Fears; stagnancy and complacency

As far as layout and graphical design, this was a jam project so I didn't spend too much time on it. The gradients and font choices were inspired by Swimmer, which has the sort of hazy, quasi-80s vibe to it. This was also my first time playing around a little bit with collaging. Fun fact though, the dimensions of the pages are the same size as a CD insert, and I stuck to a page limit that an insert could reasonable have.

If you're interested in exploring the Fractal Palace yourself, you can check out the game here and the first expansion of seven new playbooks here.

Fractal Romance is also currently part of the TTRPGs for Trans Rights in Florida bundle over on itch along with a slew of stellar games, which runs until April 8th 2023!

#fractal romance #design dive #indie ttrpgs #ttrpgs

[queerfictionwriter]

It’s Here!

So, I’ve mentioned recently that I was going to be launching a Patreon page, and here it is! It’s been a little nerve-wracking to figure out—what can I offer? How much should I offer? What’s a reasonable, sustainable amount for me? What’s a fair price to ask for? 

So, in short: I’ve launched a page that’s specifically about helping writers. Writers of fanfiction and original fiction, mostly, but there’ll be some stuff in there about poetry and non-fiction, too. The overall tone is “tools, not rules”, because good writing isn’t so much about Right and Wrong as it is using all the different elements—word choice and punctuation, grammar and tone, pace and symbols and motifs—in a way that’s effective, that helps you achieve whatever your goal is with what you’re writing. 

And I picked this particular topic for a couple of reasons: firstly, because I have a lot of thoughts about this, and have been very willing to help my fellow writers by sharing those thoughts, as anyone who’s ever shared a Discord DM with me can tell you. Secondly, because I think a lot of professional writing programs and books and courses have their methods, and those methods are often rigid and don’t work well for a lot of us, to say nothing of the fact that I’ve heard of a heartbreaking number of people who come out of MFA programs having lost their words. And I think that’s both a tragedy and a crime. I’m a writer, and I want to help other writers along their journeys and move towards their goals—and I want to do it in such a way that feels helpful and encouraging, but also, above all else, constructive. Discouraging someone from putting words on the page is the exact opposite of my goal, here. 

The other reason I picked this topic is that I’ve come to realize I have some knowledge that isn’t necessarily common, and that would probably be beneficial to a lot of writers: specifically of English grammar, but in layman’s terms. And also some advice on how to approach and structure sex scenes. Because English is a bastard language that chooses violence, and its grammar is an ouroboros that seems to require knowledge and understanding of every other English grammar concept in order to grasp This One Thing. And also because sex scenes are tricksy fuckers (heh) to write, and I know it can feel intimidating to just dive into the deep end with them, because “failing” at them can feel very vulnerable and very discouraging in ways that “failing” at an action scene or piece of dialogue often doesn’t. 

Which leads into those final points, about sustainability and price. I’ve noticed a tendency to want to help and support as many writers as I possibly can, and it’s meant I’ve overextended myself in the past. To say nothing of the fact that I can only provide so much in-depth, one-on-one help because of time constraints, and also because I only personally know so many people who are both interested in and open to that kind of help. A Patreon page, where it’s more widely available, where the tools I want to provide can be lined up and amassed like some kind of writerly gardening shed, is a more sensible, sustainable way to offer those tools, and might feel more comfortable for writers who don’t want to share their writing with me personally but do want to pick my brain for useful bits. I won’t lie, it also feels weird to monetize those skills, especially when I know that a lot of useful knowledge and tools for writers are inaccessible due to high costs and paywalls. 

With all of that in mind—and that I also have bills to pay, and that what I’m offering is, in fact, of value—I tried to set a fair price point for what I’m offering, which will be a couple of posts a month, in addition to the handful that are currently up to kick things off with. I have a list of topics I want to cover, and if anyone is curious about what’s on that list, or has other questions about how it’s going or what I’m doing over there, feel free to send me an ask about it! 

#K speaks #writing #my writing #Patreon #writing community #writers #writing is hard #non-fiction #shameless self-promotion

[crestapex]

Hello! I saw a post saying COD matchups are open! If not, please ignore this ^^ Also, I haven't fone a matchup ask in forever, so sorry if I'm rusty...

I'm punk and it really shows in my appearance. I got a red mohawk, and some piercings and tattoos. I like to customise my clothes as much as possible, so battle jackets, studs, chains, pins and patches with slogans and band icons/names are my daily wardrobe.

I'm nonbinary, panromantic asexual and I go by they them pronouns. I'm trilingual and I love learning about stuff, mostly languages and time zones. I am very probably autistic, so I have issues with social interactions as well as sensory issues and I have tics, motoric and vocal. Usually I just chirp, repeat phrases or wave my hands around, twist my neck etc. But sometimes, when I'm anxious, my tics get more violent and I often punch/pinch myself. I struggle with depression a lot as well as some unhealthy coping mechanisms that involve pain, to put it lightly.

I love art, I consider myself a poet, I got one book published and I like to attend poetry competitions. I also draw a lot and paint. I like crafting as well, I have tons of little projects either going on or in my head. I have to journal a lot, because if I don't write it down you can bet I'll forget it :D I also like cooking :)

I love animals, I used to have pet rats and would want them in the future.

I think I'm kind, maybe a bit too much, I would do anything for my loved ones. My MBTI type is INFJ if that helps. I try to make others laugh and feel comfortable, I'm kind of a mix between the parent friend and the clown friend. My love language is words of affirmation and quality time. I tend to get into arguments, because a) people usually take me seriously when I'm being sarcastic or playful (another tism trait), b) because when it comes to things I'm passionate about, I always think I'm right and I have the need to convince the other person that my opinion is better. Also because I get frustrated when people don't get what I mean exactly.

My special interests are horror, in all forms, horror movies, horror books, video essays, deep dives...I like true crime as well and I like to collect bones and other things people often deem creepy (I have a bird skeleton/mummy in a jar).

I think that's it, take as much time as you need, and again, if matchups aren't open, feel free to just delete this <3

You’re all good 👍 (I’m not too familiar with the whole MBTI type of stuff, so I tried my best to look into it, lol.)

I match you with: Rodolfo ‘Rudy’ Parra!

I think he’d be pretty into watching video essays and deep dives with you. Rudy would have no problem setting himself on the couch right beside you, claiming that it keeps him educated and his mind sharp. But really he’d end up passing out in 30 minutes, one of his arms wrapped tightly around you as if you were to magically grow wings and fly away from him. The other resting gently on your arm or thigh if you find yourself sitting practically in his lap. It’s one of the few times he finds himself at true peace and serenity.

Having any shared friends means you guys are definitely referred to as the parents of the group. Drama at the grocery store? Off to go gossip with the two of you! Looking for relationship advice? Once again, off to you and Rudy. And when you guys get into a small, tiny even, slight disagreement in front of your friends? All of sudden it’s the end of the world and everyone is talking about having two christmases. 😐

But also most likely to be the one to bring you down from confrontation or arguments. He will tell you when it’s time to take a step back and calm down, and he’ll continue to talk you down from it and put a comforting hand on your lower back. And if you want to take a moment to continue ranting about it? Go for it, he’ll listen, only to voice his opinion on the situation if you ask for it and/or after you’ve come back down to earth. He’s pretty level headed (especially compared to someone like Alejandro… *side eye*…) and tends to have good judgment like that, so I think that would balance out your relationship, especially if you’re more on the temperamental side.

I can picture him as some sort of gift giver, which I’d imagine would go pretty well with someone who has strong collector tendencies. And they wouldn’t always be the most elaborate and luxurious gifts—though it’s not out of the question—it be something small or something he just found interesting and made him think of you. Think of a gem or crystal he found be sold at a little gift stand, or a small drawstring bag full of bottle caps from all around the world and from all kinds of bottles (that, or he’d be the one to gift you the bottle caps to add a collection, lol).

Loves your artistic side, especially your poetry. Write him little pieces of poetry on a sticky note or torn corner of a piece of paper and he will most definitely keep it in his pocket, only pulling it out to read when he’s alone and missing you—“Oh, mi cielo…” he’d whisper to himself and bring the piece of paper right over his chest, on top his beating heart. He’d close his eyes and let himself be overrun with thoughts of you, even if it’s just for a quick minute before he would have to return back to work. And while you may not believe it’s your best work, Rudy will think it’s one of the most beautiful things he’s ever read.

mi cielo = “my sky” or “my Heaven”

#december 2023

[petzel]

15 questions, 15 mutuals

tagged by: @yellowjckets THANK U I LOVE UUUU!!!!

1. are you named after anyone?

nope! well, actually one of my middle names is my grandpa's name, so i'm named for my grandpa!

2. when was the last time you cried?

last night, because cam bought me a necklace at target that hit me in a very emotionally vulnerable spot. i cry just about every single day though (i am a weeper from a long line of weepers and all that)

3. do you have kids?

i do not, but cam and i desperately want them. we are currently planning for one about 5 yrs 🫣 which is frightening but also very exciting. we're crazy too, like we already have a lot of baby clothes and cam's mom is handing down her cloth diapers and stuff. all very exciting!

4. do you use sarcasm a lot?

i don't, but i am someone who struggles to understand sarcasm haha so i also struggle to use it properly.

5. what sports do you play/have you played?

i have never played sports lol. i wanted to play hockey very badly as a child (and still now), but it's expensive so i couldn't. i was told i should do track & field (specifically shotput) but i didn't want to. now i have a mild interest in dogsports, haha. i like LGRA, dock diving, rally o, and treibball.

6. what's the first thing you notice about people?

i agree with emmy about vibes, i feel like the first thing i notice is whether someone like. SEEMS nice or not.

7. what is your eye color?

like a t15/t17 on that 1998 eye color chart thing

8. scary movies or happy endings?

oh i loveee scary movies. i actually love both but horror is forever my angel

9. any special talents?

ehhh i have near limitless patience and have a decent beginner's mind? don't really think those are special talents, but hey. i can also touch my nose to my tongue i guess haha

10. where were you born?

my hometown is ann arbor, michigan. love that place forever and ever.

11. what are your hobbies?

drawing, cooking, (doing hw is not a hobby but i was in college for 4 semesters in a row and had no time for anything), dog training, photography (analog & digital), reading poetry, listening to the radio, spending time with my husband.

12. do you have pets?

yes! i have a 15 year old orange cat named buggy, and a 1 year old black and white spaniel mix named winston!

13. how tall are you?

5'4 🤫

14. favorite subject?

in grade school it was english and history, but in college, i loveee any of my classes that are actually about my major, fish & wildlife. i loved my lab last fall semester, and i'm really excited for horticulture lab this fall.

15. dream job?

mannnn who knows. i currently work at a botanical garden, which is good enough for me in the meantime! i'd like maybe some sort of labwork about birds, bc i liked working in the fish lab so much, but i also really enjoy my current staff team and i like more public facing work, so it's very up in the air rn.

TAGGING: @pepprs @centralpark1981 @romansmartini @dubwoofer @starw1sh @spelldealer @riskrov @snartled @evilsufjanstevens - all with absolutely zero pressure, i just see you all in my notifs and love you dearly be well dear mutuals

#YAYYYY this was so fun :DDDD i miss doing stuff like this on tumblr mannn this website used to be so fun and social ckfkskjfkw #salad dad #tfm #correspondence

[enarmor]

deep dive character sheet

stolen from: ree and everyone else tagging: every. last. one of you

NAME: SAIN

BODY

height: 188cm / 6′ 2

strength ★★★★☆ (he's pretty big as far as knights go, trained under wallace, and likes to flaunt his build)

dexterity ★★☆☆☆ (the lower of the two skl stats for this christmas cav pair. he's also just got more of a wild style that relies on strength and charging to overwhelm foes as opposed to deft lancemanship)

health ★★★☆☆ (reckless, but not neglectful of his health. has put himself in harm's way to use as an icebreaker with women)

energy ★★★★★ (he literally makes genki noises. c'mon.)

beauty ★★★★★ (ugliness is almost never among a lady's complaints about him)

style ★☆☆☆☆ (caelin moment. i will say he's getting somewhere with the scarf but there's an entire support chain that talks about how uncool lycians dress)

hygiene ★★★★★ (uses cosmetic product and almost always smells like flowers)

SKILLS

perception ★★★★☆ (can be willfully ignorant if he wants to be, but generally very perceptive. especially in social scenarios)

communication ★★★★☆ (can and will talk your ear off but faces a boy who cried wolf scenario with regards to his actual feelings. they are so pronounced at times that nobody believes him when they really get serious)

persuasion ★★☆☆☆ (kind of a tough one because sain gets a lot of no's but he is damn persistent and can excel in other areas. docking one star for being in an unpaired ending)

mediation ★★★★★ (he's so annoying that any would-be quarrelers will drop their fight in favor of ganging up on him)

literacy ★★★★☆ (not a scholar by any means but poetry counts for a lot)

creativity ★★★★★ (always trying a new angle. always improvising)

cooking ★★★☆☆ (i'm pegging this as a budding talent. he's got it in him but hasn't had the upbringing to bring it out)

tech savvy ★★☆☆☆ (a little simple-minded plus prefers the natural world)

combat ★★★★☆ (he was named subcommander for a reason, and this is postgame sain who participated in battles against nergal and a dragon so. pretty good)

survival ★☆☆☆☆ (his one star is earned by thinking thoughts like "what would kent say")

stealth ☆☆☆☆☆ (loud + clunky armor + doesn't like staying quiet)

street smarts ★★★★☆ (as one who mingles with the townfolk a lot, sain has to be streetwise or else fall into some pretty dangerous traps. this is also his only claim to being a mentor to anyone)

seduction ★★★☆☆ (HE SUCCEEDS OCCASIONALLY)

luck ★★★★☆ (his series of life events is pretty fortunate if you look at it all in hindsight. also has the higher lck base + growth out of his cav duo)

handling animals ★★★☆☆ (his horse bears the unfortunate tragedy of having watched him develop into a womanizer and does nawt like him for it)

pacifying children ★★★★★ (he is like a storybook character to them and also a funny fool)

MIND

intelligence ★★☆☆☆ (his reputation as a dunce is definitely a little bit intentional but there is something seriously wrong with his emotional intelligence)

happiness ★★★☆☆ (subject to change as threads progress. presents as a 5 though)

spirituality ★☆☆☆☆ (isn't really big on either of elibe's major religious systems but knows enough to make allusions while flirting)

confidence ���★★★★ (yeah.)

humor ★★★★★ (yeah...)

anxiety ★★☆☆☆(something that gets a little worse with each rejection but has yet to make any impact on anything)

patience ★★★☆☆ (definitely more of a 'this needs to happen NOW' kinda guy, though that naturally changes when waiting for his beloved to say yes to him)

passion ★★★★★ (he hails from caelin canton, home to men of passion and fire)

nice         ☆★☆☆☆ mean (can rag on people and can be a snide ass if you're mean first (or boss him around too much; though kent is immune) but generally very pleasant)

brave       ★☆☆☆☆ cowardly (you will never hear the end of this quality)

pacifist   ☆☆☆★☆ violent (sain is a man of war at the end of the day, even if he appreciates peace)

thoughtful ☆☆☆★☆ impulsive (schemes sometimes and thinks when it is desperately required of him)

agreeable ☆☆★☆☆ contrary (this one depends on who you ask)

idealistic   ★☆☆☆☆ pragmatic (lost in a world of fantasy~)

frugal        ☆☆☆☆★ big spender (very prone to spending money. very.)

extrovert   ★☆☆☆☆ introvert (going out into town is how he recharges)

collected   ☆☆☆☆★ wild (it's part of his charm, or so he'll have you believe)

ambitious / possessive / stubborn / jealous / decisive / perfectionist

SOCIAL

charisma ★★★★★ (i know we all like to point and laugh at him but he is genuinely charming and funny. "much beloved by the citizenry" to quote fe7 directly)

empathy ★★★☆☆ (the sylvain forging bonds really made me rethink this one. sain has his moments)

generosity ★★★★☆ (goes hand-in-hand with his money-spending, though he is more vocal about his generosity being ultimately selfish)

wealth ★★★☆☆ (was paid pretty well as subcommander, though sain's accumulated funds quickly dwindled when he went rogue)

honest  ☆☆★☆☆ deceptive (not deceptive for malicious reasons but he is quick to bury any feelings that aren't pleasant)

leader   ☆☆★☆☆ follower (he was second in command so lead but followed at the same time. marches to the beat of his own drum but that drum is also simping for lyn)

polite    ☆☆★☆☆  rude (he can be either and it depends who you ask)

political ☆☆☆★☆ indifferent (pretty much holds the "all politicians are stupid and corrupt" belief. has lycia proven him wrong?)

BELIEFS

higher power ★★☆☆☆ (saint elimine exists sure but the only time he's kneeling and invoking her name is to flirt with a lady)

fate/destiny ★★★★★ (this is one of the cornerstones of fe7 and also a thing that gets brought up in numerous sain interactions. even if it sounds like he's just using fate as a sweet nothing i think a big part of him genuinely believes in every woman he happens across. hence why the letdown is always so great)

magic ★★★★★ (spells aside, sain bears witness to morphs, draconic resurrection, legendary weapons, and now--elementals)

soulmates ★★★★★ (everyone can be The One unless proven otherwise)

good and evil ★★★★★ (in a poetic justice sort of sense. knights are good, scoundrels are evil)

luck ★★★★☆ (personifying her as a woman is very on-brand of him)

PRIORITIES

family ☆☆☆☆☆ (i headcanon that he killed his father, and if he had any siblings or a mother in his life we would have heard about them by now. they do not matter to sain)

friends ★★★★★ (the lyndis legion are who sain lives and dies for. nothing comes before them...)

love ★★★★★ (...except maybe this one)

home ★☆☆☆☆ (now that it's been abdicated there's not much of a home to prioritize. one star for keeping its memory alive)

health ★★★☆☆ (he's reckless but he eats, exercises, and sleeps right)

praise ★★★★★ (especially from ladies. especially from lyn.)

justice ★★★★★ (he is a knight, after all)

truth ★★☆☆☆ (cares about honesty until doing so requires admitting to some ugly things)

power ★☆☆☆☆ (wants to look big and strong but actual power interests him little if the results aren't tangible)

fame ★★★☆☆ (sort of goes hand-in-hand with praise, but he doesn't care for infamy even if it seems to follow him)

wealth ★☆☆☆☆ (as long as he can live comfortably)

others' opinions ★★☆☆☆ (sort of. he's very aware of his reputation and doesn't change but he would care if his loyalty was questioned)

#OOC #HEADCANONS #//behold

[kamelpferd]

I Am Writing A Book

For the past year I have been writing a book. A Book Of Poetry And Short Stories. It's almost finished and I will put 10 Stories into it. They are all thought through and a lot of them have already been written.

And I am so proud of myself.

Anyways, here I have a few pictures and short descriptions of the stories that will be in the book, to give you all a little idea of what is coming to you if you think you want to give my little project a closer look. I hope you can find something that is of your interest.

From brutality to sex over fantasy up to historical gay romance. I covered a lot.

I think I have done a pretty good job so far, and it will not take long until it is done. :)

The Men I've Had

She has had enough. Enough of their ego, them wanting to be better, them thinking they have the right. The right to do whatever they want with whoever they feel like. Grace Dennehy knows that everyone just looks away and lets them do as they please. She knows nothing will ever change unless somebody takes matters into their own hands. And so she does.

The Nun And The Nurse

The bible says it is a sin. God says it is a sin. They says she will go to hell for it. Burn eternally. For feeling the purest and most beautiful kind of love. The love for another woman.

Good Night, Little Kimmy

He has known her since she was a little child - But she is not a child anymore. She is a woman. A beautiful young woman who has yet to learn what the world can bring. And he wants to show her. Show her everything he can, but is it right? Is it acceptable? It can't be.

Prince Of Blood - Fate Of The Undead

What would happen if a Vampire Hunter got captured? What if she got captured by the man she was looking forward to kill? What if it turned into a game of fetch between cat and mouse? And what if he showed her what eternal life actually meant?

The Day I Died

She has to kill her. It is her fate, her role, her prophecy - but does she even want to? Does she have to? Because what if she loves her? What if she would rather die than harm her? What if she will?

In My Room

She threw up; every morning she threw up. She saw him in her dreams, night after night after night - and it wouldn't end. He wouldn't go away. He couldn't. He was dead.

Hunting Season

A chance. A chance she took and ran but then it hit her. She wouldn't get away. So she forgot and forgave. She could never escape. She was trapped. Inside his house, his basement, her own delusions. She couldn't leave, she didn't want to.

Silent Night - You Can Run But You Cannot Hide

Lilly and Billly have always been good. One December night, their mother tells them about a creature who visits those whose names are on the naughty list. He comes on christmas eve. And the two children learn about what happens to kids that don't behave.

Bonnie And Her Bride

Elizabeth Hyde's dearest friend is fed up with a life as housewife, under the resistant hand of a sweetheart, a boss and a father. So she takes Bonnie Parker with her, leaves their lives behind, along with everything they were used to and runs away, jumping right into gunfire. Little did she know how much trouble her decisions would bring.

Visitors

"We are writing the year 1983 and just outside my house, Bakerstreet 985, there is a U.F.O. It crashed in my backyard and I think there is something inside-" "Peter what the fuck are you doing?"

Alright, alright. I spent a hell of a time to create this ass post, just for my own satisfaction and to make it a little easier for myself to dive into my stories. I mean, it indeed is easier if you can see something, instead of just reading (even tho reading is also seeing something...)

Anyways, I hope could catch some of you for the one or the other story. I have been working on this book for about a year now, and it is almost done (Jesus, never decide to write a book. It kills you. Really.) But there is still a lot of work to do, so I suppose I could be done in like a year. But then I have to find a publisher... or publish it myself... which I am scared of i mean imagine it doesn't work. 0-0

ANYWAYS lets not think about this right now, haha.

There is a bunch of work ahead of me, but I am willing to do whatever it takes.

-Spencer C. Belford

#books #original story #i am wirting a book #christmas horror #period drama #unsolved mysteries #true crime #greek mythology #aliens #ufo #scifi #sapphic #wlw #lesbian pride #fantasy #vampire #christianity #author #writer #fiction

[featherquillpen]

Dear Yuletide Author

I hope more than anything that my prompts help you have fun and be creative. That's what Yuletide is all about.

In general, I like cultural worldbuilding, character study, friendship, taking small canon details and running with them, and Yuletide experimentation and weirdness. If you want to try something Different for Yuletide, consider this your opportunity.

I tend not to like pure fluff, fix-its, strongly divergent AUs, and fics that totally avoid/erase prejudice and bigotry found in canon.

On to the fandoms!

Nampeshiweisit Series - Moniquill Blackgoose

I love this book so much for its complex characters and intriguing worldbuilding. I have requested fic about Sander Jansen, because I loved him and I would absolutely adore a fic from his point of view. Some prompts:

My favorite part of the book was the chapters titled "This is the Story That ____ Told." I would love to see a take on "This is the Story That Sander Told."

What is the relationship like between Sander and his dragon Inga? They seem to relate to each other differently than the other dragon-bonded.

In the book, Sander is shown to adjust fairly easily to Anequs's radically different culture. I would love a missing scene of a moment where Sander and Anequs aren't quite on the same page.

And any kind of missing scene from the academy would be great!

Camp Damascus - Chuck Tingle

I loved this book for its deep dive into what it's like to live in a fringe Christian sect as a queer person, and the way the brainwashing gets its claws in. I requested fic about Saul because he's a cool character with some intriguing gaps in his story. Saul&Willow friendship as a theme is VERY much encouraged. Also, given the content of this book, feel free to get fucked up and disturbing in your fic if you want. Some prompts:

Who is Saul's lost love he doesn't dare to think about anymore? Does Saul seek him out after the events of the book?

How did Saul end up becoming a counselor at Camp Damascus?

What was Saul and Willow's relationship like back when he was her counselor at Camp Damascus? Do they ever end up remembering more about that time?

Anything delving into Saul's unique relationship with religion and any missing scene from the time when Willow lived at Saul's house would be great.

Babel - R.F. Kuang

WOW this book rewired my brain. I loved the emphasis on the ways language and translation can be used for colonialism and violence. I chose worldbuilding as my tag for this fandom because as a multilingual person I found the translation magic fascinating. Some prompts:

Empires always think that they were the ones to invent everything they have, but much more commonly, they stole it from somewhere else. In my mind, there must be translation magics that exist outside the scope of the British Empire. What are they? How are they different from the Oxford approach?

Along similar lines: how do Victoire and her revolutionaries use their knowledge of translation magic toward their own radical ends? What is their vision for the role of magic in a more just world?

Think outside the box on translation. What kind of translation magic could you do with Polari? ASL? Would the changes in writing systems in Korea and Japan change anything?

Happy Yuletide!

Poetry

#yuletide

[wild-houseplant]

romanticism asks, 5 10 15 for Rhodri!!

Hi hello thank you for stopping by!! :D :D Ok let's see!

5. What character from myth or fairytale best represents them? I'm going to be honest here: I couldn't find anything especially close to Rhod, either from memory or scouring the oul' internet. Honestly, the best I could get was the Tolkien legendarium. While, on a technicality, it wasn't intended as mythology, two characters strike me as very similar to her: Elrond, who is quite a firm but kind sort who's forever got his head in a book; and Glorfindel, ageless and joyful. And, it must be said, someone who might come across as a bit flippant and devil-may-care to onlookers. >_>

10. What piece of moody poetry or novel quote best encompasses your character? I don't think a moody anything encompasses Rhodri very well tbh, because she's got a pretty sunny sort of personality when all's said and done. But to encompass the moody/sad bit of her, I'll dive into the autism angst and stick in a snippet from the short story "Flowers for Algernon." In this particular part, the intellectually disabled protagonist, Charlie Gordon, has been recently made aware that people he thought were being kind to him were, in fact, mocking him. Rhodri, though not intellectually disabled, has had quite a few occasions where she thought she was fitting in, only to find out the hard way that she absolutely wasn't, and it panned out quite similarly to this. cw for emetophobia

"I didn't know what to do or where to turn. Everyone was looking at me and laughing and I felt naked. I wanted to hide myself. I ran out into the street and I threw up. Then I walked home. It's a funny thing I never knew that Joe and Frank and the others liked to have me around all the time to make fun of me. Now I know what it means when they say "to pull a Charlie Gordon." I'm ashamed."

15. What is a common misconception about your OC? (Alternatively, what do people assume about them which is either incorrect or misconstrued?)

Gosh, that's a good question. I won't rehash the whole resting bitch face/Terrifying Vint thing, because lord knows I do that often enough in the longfic.

One thing I do think people might get wrong about her is that she's inflexible to the point of going to pieces when even the smallest thing is out of order, but I personally don't think that's true. Not entirely, anyway. Rhodri's got a handful of things that should be done in a certain order, but really, if some of those things are mixed around (dinner before washing, for example), she'll keep her discomfort to herself and power through it. Hell, she'll even enjoy herself once she's a few bites in.

It's only when everything else is going terribly wrong that she insists on having order over how she does things. Sensory overwhelm, the rest of the day's plans have gone to shit, had some terrible news... and really, when anyone has a day like that, they need something to bring them a little comfort. Getting things back in the right order is soothing for her because in such an unpredictable world, having control over her schedule means she at least knows how the rest of her shitty day will go.

At the end of the day, I really think Rhod's a rather live-and-let-live person. She won't force anyone to keep to her schedule. She'll even help people goof off-- and do it with a smile. I don't thinks he asks much of people, really.

#thank you for the asks cool bean!! These were great and I really had to think for a while!! #Askin' games #Rhodri Amell

[ninja-muse]

June felt like a really good reading month, though my Storygraph stats say I’m pretty much even on book count and seriously down on page count. Maybe it’s because I read some really good books and managed to finish three books over the last four days? Or because I managed to read “The Angel of Khan el-Khalili” by P. Djèlí Clark and a Seanan McGuire novella on top of everything*? Or because I’m really liking the history book I’ve just started so am ending the month on a high? I’ll go with a mix of those, I think.

*which I’m not counting here because neither was a physical book

I managed two books off my physical TBR this month—Stardust Thief, Rat Queens—and I only acquired one book, as long as you don’t count reading copies! We got remaindered copies of The Bookstore Cat this month and I couldn’t resist. He’s seriously the best cat and I love him. My ARC pile, on the other hand, is up by 5 books….

And now, my total books read in order of how glad I am to have read them:

Katzenjammer - Francesca Zappia Cat’s trapped in high school, her eyes have disappeared, her classmates are mutating and dying in the halls, and she doesn’t remember how any of this happened. - 🏳️‍🌈 secondary characters - warning: body horror, gore, blood, murder, bullying

Rosebud - Paul Cornell Five AI discover a strange ship. The Company wouldn’t want them to investigate, except maybe if they go anyway, they will be Heroes. Douglas Adams, but angry. - 🏳️‍🌈 secondary characters - warning: in-universe transphobia

Shadows of Berlin - David R. Gillham A woman in New York is torn between honouring her heritage and her dead, being a good 1950s housewife to escape her past, and being true to herself. - Jewish cast, mentally ill main character, Black secondary character - warning: the Holocaust, PTSD, child neglect and abuse, misogyny

Trailed - Kathryn Miles In 1995, a sapphic couple were brutally killed in a national park. Now a journalist does a deep dive into the investigation to understand where it went wrong. - 🏳️‍🌈 subjects - warning: murder, violence against women, dead queer women

Minique - Anna Maxymiw A girl in colonial Montreal witnesses the world around her and decides to pursue an independent life no matter what. - 🇨🇦 - warning: misogyny, sexual assault, rape

Rosaline Palmer Takes the Cake - Alexis Hall Rosaline hopes to win on Bake Expectations and fix her life. Unfortunately, the first co-contestant she meets, she lies to about everything. But that’ll be okay, right? - 🏳️‍🌈 protagonist, South Asian secondary character, 🏳️‍🌈 author - warning: sexual assault

Elder Race - Adrian Tchaikovsky A princess seeks a wizard’s help in defeating a demon. The wizard is an isolated anthropologist who’s only meant to observe the locals—but he goes on the quest anyway.

Legends & Lattes - Travis Baldree Viv has retired from adventuring to start a coffee shop, but she can’t (and doesn’t want to) do it alone. - 🏳️‍🌈 protagonist, 🏳️‍🌈 secondary character

The Stardust Thief - Chelsea Abdullah A dealer in illegal magical artifacts is blackmailed into a search for a lamp containing a djinn king. Nobody travelling with her is quite who they seem, and neither is the mission. - Arab cast, Arab author, #ownvoices

The Monsters We Defy - Leslye Penelope A woman who can speak to ghosts gathers a crew to steal a ring. If they don’t, they’ll neither save the poorest people in 1920s DC, or themselves. - Black cast, 🏳️‍🌈 secondary character, albino secondary character, Black author, #ownvoices

The Collected Poetry of Dorothy Parker - Dorothy Parker Surprisingly relatable 100-year-old poetry. - warning: suicidal ideation

Rat Queens, Vol. 4: High Fantasies - Kurtis J. Wiebe, Owen Gieni (Illustrator) The Rat Queens are getting back into the questing biz, but now they have some serious competition. - Black main character, 🏳️‍🌈 main characters, 🇨🇦 author

Spellbound - Allie Therin Rory can read an object’s past and is trying to keep his head down. Arthur’s tracking magical artifacts and looking for someone with Rory’s talent. Neither expects sparks to fly when they meet. - 🏳️‍🌈 main characters, Black secondary character, Chinese-American secondary character

Currently reading:

Let's Do It - Bob Stanley A history of Anglo-Western pop music, from the early 1900s. - warning: racism, including slurs

Death by Bubble Tea - Jennifer J. Chow When her cousin comes to town, Yale finds herself drafted into co-running a stall at the LA Night Market. Then one of their customers turns up dead. - Chinese-American cast, Chinese-American author, #ownvoices The Penguin Complete Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle Victorian detective stories - major disabled character



Stats


Monthly total: 13 
Yearly total: 79 + 1
 Queer books: 3.5
 Authors of colour: 2
 Books by women: 7
 Canadian authors: 2
 Off the TBR shelves: 2


January February March April May

#reading wrap-ups #read in 2022 #books #booklr #bookblr #book covers #book photography #my photos #book reviews

[ceramicdove]

DEAR DOVE (explodes u in a mircowave) i was reading a nonfiction collection of articles on psychiatry and i was wondering if u liked reading nonfiction urself!

personally i love writing nonfiction the most because its easy to write about the world and argue about things but fiction requires a lot more of u thinking and having to unpack stuff! in fact as a child i rlly enjoyed reading encyclopedias, although i rarely absorbed it proper.

anyways enough of me,, do u have a favourite non fiction topic of interest or whatever!

DEAR LAB (explodes into a massive pile of glitter and confetti, subsequently setting the countertop on fire)

I do read non-fiction! I generally take more to other types of writing, but I did also grow up perusing encyclopedias, magazines, history books, textbooks, etcetera. so I regard it fondly in one way or another. I sometimes enjoy deep-diving for obscure academic papers when I'm in a brunt and want information on a specific subject, though it usually takes more time to digest due to higher-level technical language that I'm not familiar with as a high-schooler. I still find that it's worth it.

it's almost like a game when I hunt for things sometimes because it's interesting to see how obscure of a topic I can find: I start at something relatively basic and end up at papers specific enough that I'm not even sure how they exist (but I'm grateful). A recent example of this is a paper I found called "Exploring post-irony through narratives of love and suffering in VRChat" and, well, it's exactly what the titles says it is. I've yet to finish reading it, but I went crazy the moment I even saw that somebody would write such a deep article on a Steam VR game where people with 3D anime girl avatars go to scream at each other.

I occasionally dabble in reading self-help, but I interact with academic non-fiction the most.

I'm not sure if I can say I have a particular topic of interest, though in recent times I've been occasionally reading papers on cultural norms, traditions, historical evolutions and differences, and I have taken a liking to it. I also started (and need to continue) reading up on philosophy, death, mourning and other similar concepts (and especially how we as humans have interacted with death across time and space). It's not even just non-fiction, one of the recent books I picked up is a poetry collection about death from a local writer. This is something I made myself do due to two projects I have that both follow death as relevant themes: I wanted to make sure I can cover it in a way that goes beyond the surface level. I don't know if I can call this a Favourite Topic Of Interest, though, because it's actually quite an upsetting and suffocating thing to read about, at least for me, but I know I have to do it. Maybe this is exposure therapy of some sort.

And I like journalism! Before my English exam I actually forced myself to read a lot of British journalists just to pick up new language and get more used to Their Way of writing, since we study British English and therefore have to utilise it during exams (yuck). But it was fun, and I appreciate how certain journalists and researchers have a very fascinating way with words that almost feels narrative.

Regarding actually writing it, it's fun in its own way. I used to do it back when I was doing debate and had to write notes, reports, speeches and case files. It required me to read anything from entry-level articles on Google to more advanced papers and official government documents depending on the motion. It was fun compiling and sourcing all of that information! And it was fun gaining new knowledge. Nowadays a chunk of my classmates rely on me to guide them in writing non-fiction for our classes because they deem me to be good at it and think I have a solid vocabulary, so maybe it paid off a bit.

But ultimately, I'll always lean towards creative forms of writing. I can't sustain writing non-fiction for too long without feeling like my brain is shriveling up into a raisin.

#🕊️📬 #thank you for asking :-] and I'm curious about the psychiatry papers you're reading

[classicallokirose]

It Doesn’t Smell Like Gommie’s House Anymore

I wrote this poem a little less than a year ago, and it's about my experience with my first time going into my aunt's house since she had been diagnosed with glioblastoma. It was the first poem I wrote to cope with my grief. My aunt was affectionately called Gommie by me and my sister. It’s also important to note that at one point in the poem I say how Gommie is drifting to the right. This is because my aunt’s tumor was on the right side of her brain, and it affected her vision out of her left eye. She compensated for her partial blindness by drifiting right, so she wouldn’t hit anything she couldn’t see. This poem is very centered around normal grief because of my aunt's diagnosis, as well as anticipatory grief because we knew what to expect (avereage survival time after a diagnosis of glioblastoma is 15 months. At this point it had been 5 months).

I had never really written poetry before, so be kind if it's not very good! Please enjoy, and feel free to like, reblog, add notes, and share with friends, family, or therapists! Please do not post my work on any other sites however, unless it is simply a link back to this post. 

It doesn't smell like Gommie's house anymore

I stand behind my cousin As she pushes in the door. 

I’d forgotten how tightly that door sealed How heavy it was for my small frame as a child.

We enter the house. I take a deep breath, like I always have the second we enter.

That smell soothes me. It comforts me. It is always the same, steady and unwavering.

It smells like clean soap. Warm hugs. Chicken nuggets by the pool and cinnamon bread for a bedtime snack.

But…

It doesn’t smell like Gommie’s house anymore.

It smells wrong. But everything is wrong anymore.

I look at the mirror, filled with hats… And stories.

This house is a graveyard of stories.

We move to the garage, to let in my mother and Gommie. Gommie moves slowly. She drifts to the right.

It’s a painful reminder of why we’re at the house. At least the garage still smells the same.

Eventually, we make our way to the dining room.  We go through the hutch, divying up what we want.

Pulling things out, we realize we’ll need boxes. We’ll go to the attic to get those.

We move on to the computer room next, grabbing some photo albums. Then the guest room, then the master. All for photos.

My sister and I, our smiles frozen in time. I find a picture of myself with braces. That picture goes at the bottom of the pile. 

We all laugh, my cousin and I, our mothers.  We think back to happier times, when we weren’t sorting through this graveyard. 

A graveyard of stories. 

There are stories in every room of this house.  Childhood summers spent here, playing with Legos in the computer room. Playing house in the guest room.

We move onto the living room and the kitchen. Gommie sits for a bit, too tired to continue.

I look around the chile pepper filled kitchen. I take photos of the peppers on the wall.

Gommie’s hand painted those. The hand that now shakes, weak from chemo and radiation.

I want those peppers on my skin. I should show them to the tattoo artist. I go back and take a picture of the stained glass door.  That would be a nice tattoo too.

By now we are laden with dishes and photos. Memories. Stories.

We need boxes.

We take the trek to the attic. I stood at the bottom of those stairs as a child. Who knows how many times I’ve run up and down these stairs My sister close behind.

I take a deep breath.

It smells the same up here. This scent, of musty safeness, remains.

Maybe it can protect me from the hell I will be forced to endure. I wish I could live in this attic forever.

I follow my cousin, gathering boxes. We only find three.  We go back downstairs. 

As my mom and cousin pack the dishes I look into the backyard.

That pool. It is the essence of my summers here. Waiting for sunscreen to dry. Eating chicken nuggets at the picnic table. Learning to dive. Learning how much a belly flop hurts. Racing from one end to the other. Getting good enough at swimming to go to the deep end.

I used to drop dive sticks in the deep end.  Once you get to a certain point under the water, it feels like the pressure is crushing you.  You want to go up. It would be so easy to go up. But you have to get that damned dive stick.

That feels like my life now.  Being crushed. Wanting to swim up, back to safety. Where I don’t have a sick aunt. 

But I keep swimming down. Because no matter what, I want that dive stick. I want my aunt safe. Back with me. I won’t leave her in the deep end alone.

I go help with the dishes.

Once they are done, I look around at the chile pepper stuff.  I want some of this for my own house someday.

We pack that up too.

I notice how the knobs on the cabinets have been changed. They no longer have small peppers on them.

Stupid changing knobs. I wish they had stayed the same.

I grab some magnets off the fridge, ones that remind me of my childhood.

We’re almost done now. 

We all go back to the computer room, and start looking at pictures. I see photos of my grandfather that I’ve never seen before.

He’s smiling in them. He looks happy.  Someday, photos will be all I have left of Gommie. 

The battery on her treatment machine starts to die.

It’s time to leave.

Put the ghosts to rest in this graveyard.

We gather up the boxes.

I find espresso cups at the last second.  I have to have them, they’re so damn cute.

As we take the last load out,  I know I’m leaving this house for good. 

I don’t take that one last breath like I always do. The last breath of pool chemicals and sunburns. Sugar and spice. Laughter and love.

Because this house no longer smells like Gommie anymore.

#poems #poem #poetry #young poets #poet #hashtags for poets #words #poem society #writing #writer #write #poets #my poetry #my poem #original poem #original poetry #original writing #gommie #poetic #creative corner #creative writing #writers corner #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #glioblastoma #gbm #glioblastomamultiforme #death #grief #grief poetry

[vital-information]

“When it comes to Jane, so many images have been danced before us, so rich, so vivid, so prettily presented. They’ve been seared onto our retinas in the sweaty darkness of a cinema, and the aftereffect remains, a shadow on top of everything we look at subsequently.

It’s hard; it requires an effort for most readers to blink those images away, to be able to see Edward Ferrars cutting up a scissor case (a scene that arguably carries a strong suggestion of sexual violence) rather than the 1990s heartthrob Hugh Grant nervously rearranging the china ornaments on the mantelpiece. By the time you’ve seen Colin-Firth-as-Mr.-Darcy poised to dive into a lake 50 times, it’s made a synaptic pathway in your brain. Indeed, I’d question whether we can get away from that, certainly how we do.

And this ought to concern us, because a lot of the images—like the images on the banknote—are simplistic, and some of them are plain wrong. Pemberley isn’t on the scale of the great ducal mansion at Chatsworth; Captain Wentworth doesn’t buy Kellynch Hall for Anne as a wedding present at the end of Persuasion; the environs of Highbury, the setting for Emma, aren’t a golden pastoral idyll. We have, really, very little reason to believe that Jane was in love with Tom Lefroy. But each image colors our understanding in some way or another, from Henry Austen’s careful portrait of his sister as an accidental author to Curtis Sittenfeld’s updated Pride and Prejudice, set in suburban Cincinnati.

The effect of all of them together is to make us read novels that aren’t actually there.

In the run-up to the invasion of Iraq, the then secretary of defense, Donald Rumsfeld, famously suggested that there were three classes of knowledge. There were known knowns—things you know you know. There were known unknowns—things you know you don’t know. And there were unknown unknowns—things you don’t know you don’t know. I would suggest that when dealing with someone like Jane Austen, we could add another, and more dangerous, class of knowledge; what might be termed the unknown knowns—things we don’t actually know but think we do.

*

If we want to be the best readers of Jane’s novels that we can be, the readers that she hoped for, then we have to take her seriously. We can’t make the mistake that the publisher Crosby made and let our eyes slide over what doesn’t seem to be important. We can’t shrug off apparent contradictions or look only for confirmation of what we think we already know. We have to read, and we have to read carefully, because Jane had to write carefully, because she was a woman and because she was living through a time when ideas both scared and excited people.

And once we read like this, we start to see her novels in an entirely new light. Not an undifferentiated procession of witty, ironical stories about romance and drawing rooms, but books in which an authoress reflects back to her readers their world as it really is—complicated, messy, filled with error and injustice. This is a world in which parents and guardians can be stupid and selfish; in which the Church ignores the needs of the faithful; in which landowners and magistrates—the people with local power—are eager to enrich themselves even when that means driving the poorest into criminality. Jane’s novels, in truth, are as revolutionary, at their heart, as anything that Wollstonecraft or Tom Paine wrote. But by and large, they’re so cleverly crafted that unless readers are looking in the right places—reading them in the right way—they simply won’t understand.

Jane wasn’t a genius—inspired, unthinking; she was an artist. She compared herself to a miniature painter; in her work every stroke of the brush, every word, every character name and every line of poetry quoted, every location, matters.

It’s here, in the novels, that we find Jane—what there is of her to find, after all these years, after all her family’s efforts at concealment. It’s here we find a clever woman, clear-sighted, a woman “of information,” who knew what was going on in the world and what she thought about it.”

— Helena Kelly, “The Many Ways in Which We Are Wrong about Jane Austen: Lies, Damn Lies, and Literary Scholarship”

#jane austen