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#I actually don't know if this counts as a oc lol
jeannos · 6 months
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I'M CRINGE BUT I'M FREE.
every kid in this fandom MUST have their au phase where they make aus of this stupid skeleton, and I FINALLY got the courage to make one!!
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I lied actually... I have like 6 sans/skeleton ocs... and 2 of them are self inserts... BUT ANYWAY this guy is the only one I posting publicly atm
btw this reference specifically is really old (I started drawing this in like- 2021/2022 I guess?? Idk honestly) but I never actually finished it till recently bc, yeah, I got super lazy... ironic isn’t it? I don't even draw Sanses like this anymore -_-
SUPER AMAZING AU INTRO ↓
THIS HANDSOME FELLA IS- IS- is...
...
he does not have a actual name yet...
I mean- I call him Dreamer!Sans but I'm not really sure if I'm gonna set with that yet, since I don't actually have a story/plot for him besides his purpose in the multiverse, but I do have some other ideas ;]
Dreamer!Sans is basically a protector of dreams, he protects mostly the realities of dreams (or the Dreamscapes, is what I like to call them) to make sure everyone from his au and multiverse have sweet and safe dreams.
Theres this things called Night Spawns or Nightlings who feeds from peoples nightmares and trauma while they are asleep. They oddly look like spiders... Dreamer is responsible for defeating these pests.
"But why?" you may ask.
Well... the Nightlings "power" to manifest bad dreams in your sleep can cause you depression, anxiety, paranoia, and much more, if they stay too long attached to someone, AND since they are really hungry they are trying to consume the dreamscapes of the person they are attached to. If they succeeds, one may never dream again (or woke up, in other words)
"What are Dreamscapes?"
Every time someone dreams, that person's consciousness is "transported" to this place, and each person has their own dreamscapes!! They are directly connected to people's consciousness and that is why they are so important.
SILLY BILLY SKELE INFO ↓
Hes mostly like classic Sans, very lazy, laid back/relaxed, and he enjoys puns a lot
but it's a little more extreme-
• He is always tired and cannot stay awake for more than 20 minutes without falling asleep again
• He aways looks tired/sleepy
• Sometimes he sleepwalks, he can do unbelievable things while he's asleep, from knitting and cooking to physically fighting or writing a quantum science research, all unconscious!
• For some reason sometimes he sleeps in super specific and random places, once he slept for two whole days inside Nightmare!Sans' castle and no one ever noticed... strange right? He wasn't even in a room, he slept in the kitchen storage the entire time lol
• He has been in and out of so many people's dreams that he probably knows EVERYONE, he has an incredible memory too!
• Sometimes he can't tell if he's really awake or if he's still dreaming, so he doesn't usually take things around him seriously. Which can make other people upset or annoyed that they're not being taken seriously.
• He learned to never try to find meanings in dreams that don't make the LEAST sense, and since he cannot distinguish which reality he is in because he is almost always dreaming- he will always accept anything absurd you propose to him.
You wanna make a birthday party for a giant unicorn baby? sure sounds fun.
You think Shrek is upset and needs help? yeah lets cheer him up.
Several alternate versions of him are fighting for some bizarre reason he doesn't understand?? yeah ok he can help, he don't mind.
• He snores when he's having a really deep sleep, he won't believe it if you tell him that tho
THE END!?
Well thats it! These are my ideas and thoughts about this Sans I created, I might and probably will add more things about him and his story later in other posts, can't wait to finally see his au takes more shape hehe~
also I will make another post about his magic skills and possible weapon along with more illustrations of him, so keep a eye out for more~~
heres a old doodle I made of him before finishing his ref, bye bye!! :3
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ignore my old signature pls T-T
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blujayonthewing · 2 months
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Heartbreak, midnight, mistake for Mel if they haven’t been asked and actually can you dow them for Felix too, cause why not.
heartbreak: Have they ever had a relationship that ended badly? Experienced some other kind of heartbreak? What happened?
biting my fist I wish I had better answers for this because I love this question. The problem with both felix and mel is that they are in their 50s and 60s respectively, which isn't very many for a gnome but is still just A Lot Of Years for me, an idiot, to fill with life experiences and I've mostly been really bad about doing that kfgjhdgj.
Melliwyk has always been really bad at relationships in general; she's dated a little, mostly very casually, but especially once she was in the academy she fell pretty hard into 'yes yes yes I'll go socialize when I'm done working on this' chaining one project into the next ad infinitum, especially after the experiment backfire explosion that gave her a reputation as this sort of ruthless researcher and resulted in kind of a feedback loop of people assuming she preferred to be left alone, which meant fewer people bugging her into socializing once in awhile, which reinforced her perception as a loner, etc. I think she's been in at least a handful of relationships with people she really liked that could have been serious but just... sort of fell apart; more regrets than outright heartbreaks.
Honestly as of current canon, I think the worst outright heartbreak Mel's had that I know of was being attacked by, and then losing, her house's ghost as soon as she found out he was real the whole time; aside from Baxter, he was her only friend for years and years, even if only an 'imaginary' one, and it was a gut punch to, essentially, finally find him but then immediately lose him forever.
Felix has even less canon backstory I could tell you about right now, alas :') He's been in very few meaningful relationships; he's not good at putting himself out there, and having a brief encounter with a stranger is a lot easier to navigate than... well, someone else being disappointed with the way he is as a whole person. To be fair, I don't think he's been openly rejected a lot, but the way he sort of expects it shapes his behavior such that it makes it harder for others to get that close to him in the first place. I can very much see him having had his heart broken before, but I'd have to get back to you on specifics ^^; These days he mostly keeps to himself; he likes people, but it's easier for him to be around them than to be one of them.
I am incapable of brevity! The rest under the cut!
midnight: What keeps your OC up at night? Do they have nightmares? Fears? Anxieties? What do they do in the small hours of the morning when they should be sleeping?
Melliwyk is up working. She'd be up working anyway, but especially if she's upset-- working tirelessly, if not relentlessly. She's not good with emotions; she processes things by keeping busy, either looking for Solutions or just looking to throw herself into something productive rather than having to feel her feelings. This is overlapping really neatly with her current major source of stress, which is that everything she's working on is deeply important, and anything she neglects in order to work on those things is also deeply important, and other people are getting hurt and will continue to get hurt if she can't prioritize tasks correctly or do enough quickly enough and well enough. She doesn't have time for fears! Or anxieties! Or sleep! Or dinner! And it's great! After all, she loves her work! She's interested! Passionate! No downsides!! She doesn't have nightmares because the reason she wears that goofy hat at all times is literally to magically prevent nightmares, but I bet if she slept without it her nightmares would be real interesting right now :)
The facetious answer for Felix is: his sleep schedule is sort of unusual, so when he's up in the small hours it's normal and he's getting up to whatever his normal gnome business is, lol. But in the proper spirit of the question:
He lost a lot of sleep after the mysterious encounter that took a chunk of his memory and left a strange mark on his skin. In general, Felix is not immune to getting too invested in [area of interest] and staying up way too late, so he's certainly lost sleep working on/ thinking over really interesting mysteries before, but that situation has so many unknowns, has so many worrying or grim implications, has given him so much to think about and yet so little to actually work with...! The fact that he can't remember getting back to town is what upsets him the most. He's found himself (or put himself) in a lot of really dangerous situations, but he's always had control of his own mind and body before, even when he's been physically overpowered by others.
More generally, sometimes he'll learn something or uncover some secret that he ends up losing sleep over, especially if it's information about something bad that he doesn't feel like he can actually act on. The city he spends most of his time in is less-than-secretly controlled by a powerful criminal guild, so he has to maintain a really delicate balance between snooping around a lot just because that's what interests him anyway, helping others as much as he can, but also staying out of the way of the guild and the law enough that the worst either of them do is, you know, beat him up a little and/or throw him in jail for a couple days, rather than deciding it'd be better if he Just Disappeared.
If he's worried or anxious and can't sleep over it, he'll generally go for a walk, or go sit on a roof for awhile, or sit somewhere and draw if the weather's bad. He doesn't have a lot of nightmares, but when he does they're often about being trapped somewhere and being unable to call for help, or seeing people pass by who can't seem to see or hear him (all of which he stubbornly refuses to read into).
mistake: What’s the worst mistake your OC ever made? What led to them making it? Have they been able to fix it? How have they moved on?
A little while back, Melliwyk's party returned from a ground excursion to find our airship under attack by a powerful archmage, her personal bodyguard, a bunch of summoned fiends, and a crew of elite soldiers; as soon as she managed to get back on deck Melliwyk launched a fireball at the archmage and then moved toward the cabin looking to get cover inside, and the archmage returned with a massive flamestrike right on top of Mel, who... had just run directly to where most of the crew of the ship were, all of whom had already taken damage before we got there. Our first mate went down, and we managed to get him just inside the door to the stairs leading belowdecks, but before any healers could reach him a previously invisible imp stung him, killing him instantly, right at Melliwyk's feet.
And the thing is. Maybe it wouldn't have mattered whether she, personally, drew fire to him; he had already been pretty hurt, and it was a rough battle for everyone, and there's no reason to believe the archmage still wouldn't have dropped a big AOE on half the ship. And maybe it's perfectly reasonable that Melliwyk, a wizard, a transmutation wizard, didn't try to use her entire action in the middle of a pitched battle to try to stabilize him when there were no obvious enemies nearby, and an actual healer was literally feet away, running to help him. Maybe. But she can only think that it was so, so stupid of her, that if she'd just thought for one second, for once-- ... anyway. The next week or so were all 'Mel doesn't leave her room or speak to anyone' days. Working. Relentlessly. She'd already been working on figuring out a method to use her newly-learned insights into artificing to cast spells, but the first spells she actually programmed into the device she was working on were spare the dying, cure wounds, and revivify.
Felix bit off more than he could chew; he was following the trail of some weird rumors in a smaller town, hoping to find a connection to a string of recent petty thefts he'd been looking into, but he underestimated what kind of people he was dealing with-- both in terms of skills, and of how serious their operation actually was. He got caught pretty deep into their base of operations, way too deep for any attempt at plausible deniability, and after beating the shit out of him they opted to just tie him up and leave him in an abandoned and mostly blocked-off sewer passage to die, rather than kill him outright. He only escaped by convincing the rats to chew through the ropes, quickly made his way out of the city by staying belowground for as long as possible, and has never been back since-- there's a chance they forgot about him immediately, but there's also a very good chance that they'd be really upset if that guy who Knows Too Much is still just running around like a dangerous loose thread.
It was just-- well, maybe not cockiness, he's not exactly the cocky type, but certainly carelessness. He got sloppy, over-interested and under-cautious; he hadn't really expected to be dealing with people who'd be able to catch him so easily, much less that he'd be in any serious danger if they did. He was expecting, like, a gang of teenagers at worst-- not not a threat, but people he could maybe stand up to in a fight, or wriggle free from pretty easily, or who at the very least wouldn't try to fucking kill him. This would have been fairly early in his career (so to speak) of trying to tail people and break into places for actual, like, private investigation reasons rather than pure curiosity, so he didn't have a good handle on the risks, or the stakes; he's (usually) a lot more careful nowadays, although sometimes he still can't resist pushing his luck.
ask about my OCs?
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birthclod · 2 months
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I want to make a list on my blog of characters who are like my fictional siblings or whatnot but idk what to do for it. The term familial f/o makes nervous and im hesitant to use it but i don't know why
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sansaorgana · 1 month
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— THROWN TO THE WOLVES (IX)
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PART ONE || PART TWO || PART THREE PART FOUR || PART FIVE || PART SIX PART SEVEN || PART EIGHT || PART TEN
PAIRING — Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Reader // Atreides!OC
SUMMARY — Feyd-Rautha focuses on bringing back the spice production to full efficency while his wife plots against The Baron. The ghosts of her past are haunting her in the Arrakeen Palace where her family lived and died.
AUTHOR’S NOTE — It’s written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Reader’s looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is Paul Atreides’ half-sister. This chapter is quite long so I think the next one will be the last...? Of course I am open to write some additional chapters with these characters in the future 👀 Thank you everyone supporting my work 🙏🏻😭 I don't know when I'll post the next / last chapter. Next week I hope but it might take me more time than usual because I have to catch up with uni work finally lol
WARNINGS — arranged marriage, mentions of sexual activities (no actual smut), violent behaviour, death
WORD COUNT — 8,170
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
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THROWN TO THE WOLVES (IX)
Feyd-Rautha was barely able to hide his excitement on that day. Becoming the Governor of Arrakis was a huge deal – not only it proved that he was his uncle’s worthy successor if he was given such responsibility, but also Arrakis remained the most important planet under the Harkonnen rule due to the spice resources. Controlling this planet was like controlling the universe.
Before the official ceremony would begin, he had to deal with the formalities, all dressed up in the accurate black leather attire and pride on his face. Then his wife entered the throne room accompanied by the guards and from that moment he could only focus on her.
Her black leather dress’ design was mimicking his uniform’s one and her face was hidden by the veil made of chains and gemstones. She walked past him and bowed down in front of his uncle. Feyd knew that was the custom but it still made him clench his jaw and blood boil.
She straightened herself and fixed her dress on her abdomen as it was getting too tight in that area. Feyd smirked at the sight of her womb getting visibly swollen with his child. With his heir.
His wife signed the contract about him becoming the new Governor of Arrakis as the Atreides signet ring sparkled on her pinky finger. The truth was, her signature was not required there at all but the Baron loved to humiliate her in this way. However, she managed to do it with such dignity. Feyd wondered if she still felt like an Atreides. That signet ring wasn’t leaving her pinky finger at all ever since it had been adjusted to her size.
He wondered if it was a symbol of power for her or did she keep it for sentimental reasons.
Sentiment. That word was new in Feyd-Rautha’s dictionary. But now, when he watched his wife standing behind him with her hands clasped on her womb, he swore he could feel it.
He couldn’t explain most of the things happening inside his body at the sight of her. It was more than plain desire or sexual attraction. In fact, he had had lovers more adventurous than her and surely more experienced. But he had never met a woman like that.
She made him think of his mother, especially now, when she was expecting his child. He wondered what kind of mother she would be. Would she… love… his son? Or would he be another pawn in her court games…?
His mother was cold and distant but only recently Feyd had realised it was no reason to kill her. Was it possible that some part of him regretted it? His uncle had manipulated him into doing something he couldn’t truly understand back in the day – an act impossible to undo and sealing his murderous fate.
But even his mother had never touched him so gently like his wife. And he knew that it was weak to crave that but he did – he craved more from her and her only. He would kill anyone looking at her the wrong way but she could disrespect him in any way and he’d still be on his knees for her. He had never been as obedient to his uncle. He had feared him as a little boy and then he had hated him, waiting for his turn on the Harkonnen throne. The obedience to his wife was dictated by admiration and… sentiment.
Yes, that was a new word in his dictionary.
And his harpies… Well, he had been attached to them but killing them had felt cold – he hadn't even felt sorry.
The room slowly filled with people who were to witness his nomination for the Governor of Arrakis. Feyd stood proudly and already imagined the day he would be nominated The Baron Harkonnen.
And when his uncle officially named him the Governor, Feyd grabbed his face and brought it down for an angry kiss that was a mockery of gratitude. In that kiss there was a promise of the upcoming succession of the much more important title. In that kiss there was the Harkonnen poison and everyone cheered but the Baron knew.
He knew.
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You were laying on your bed on the ship inside your cabin and playing with the Atreides signet ring on your pinky finger. It felt surreal to realise that under different circumstances you would had made the same journey a few months earlier with your family when your father had been gifted Arrakis.
Your stream of thoughts was interrupted abruptly by Feyd walking inside the cabin.
“Apparently, Rabban has no idea we are coming,” he announced with a smirk and sat on the bed next to you, waiting for your approval like a little boy after telling his mother exciting news.
“Why do you hate him so?” You only asked and his smirk dropped in an instant. “Is he not your brother?”
“Do you love yours?” Feyd tilted his head a little as he watched you carefully.
“It doesn’t matter anymore,” you smiled sadly at him and caressed your bump. “He is dead and so is his older sister. But in that relationship, I was Rabban and Paul was you.”
“I am better than Rabban. He means nothing,” Feyd shrugged his arms, visibly annoyed at the fact that you scolded him and started asking questions instead of sharing his excitement.
“Do you think you will catch a tan on Arrakis?” You changed the subject and chuckled at the confused glance he gave you.
“I’m not going there for vacation,” he moved closer to you on the bed and placed his hand on your womb. You felt its warmth spreading all over your body. “And neither are you,” he reminded you.
“I know.”
“The medic says that the Arrakis might do you good. The sun and all,” Feyd explained, a bit awkwardly.
“Yes, I know. But it is also not a very pleasant environment. It is hot and dry,” you sighed. “And full of spice.”
“You will have everything you want and need there, my Baroness,” Feyd leaned in to suck on your neck – his idea of a romantic kiss. You leaned back and sighed at the pleasure.
“How big do you think he is now?” You caressed your husband’s hand gently and he moved away from the crook of your neck to look into your eyes. “Our son. Do you think he is still smaller than your hand?” You bit on your lower lip. “I like to imagine him so little that your hand covers him whole when you place it on my womb.”
“Do you think of him often?” Feyd asked and you furrowed your brows at his question.
“Of our son?” You wanted to make sure and he nodded. “All the time,” you answered with all honesty. “And you…?” You asked, carefully.
“All the time,” Feyd nodded and looked down at his hand caressing your bump.
“And what do you think?” You were scared to know the answer but you needed to know it.
“I’m proud to have a son. He will be the Baron one day and I will train his body to become even stronger than mine. And you will train his mind to be sharp like yours,” Feyd looked at you. He was serious but you chuckled at that as you caressed his cheek with your thumb.
“Just promise me that you won’t do to him what has been done to you,” you whispered as the smile disappeared from your face. “Please,” you pleaded.
“It has to be done,” was all he said as his jaw clenched.
“No, it doesn’t,” you shook your head. You could feel the tears forming in your eyes. Thinking of what your husband had gone through was painful enough but imagining your son going through the same thing was even worse.
“How else do you want him to be a great warrior?” Feyd laughed at you. “He will need discipline.”
“Discipline does not have to mean abuse. I want him to follow your steps out of admiration and respect. Do you want your own son to feel the same way towards you that you feel towards your uncle?” You raised an eyebrow at him. “Do you want your son to plot how to get rid of you? To wait impatiently for you to finally die and rot?”
“No, I do not,” he admitted after a short while of hesitation.
“Then we will do it my way,” you stated.
“I don’t want my children to be weaklings,” Feyd drawled as his hand squeezed your womb possessively.
“Neither do I,” you assured him. “And it insults me greatly that you think that I would raise them to be weak. I hate weakness,” you gave him a stern look.
“There’s your answer why I hate my brother,” he said and moved down to lay his head on your womb. You carefully caressed his temples in a soothing manner.
You still had to play little games with him sometimes, you assumed it would always be like this one way or another. But you loved him. Yes, you loved him.
Princess Atreides would rather die than admit that. For the Harkonnen na-baroness it was difficult to admit her feelings, too. But you didn’t mind giving up and finally allowing yourself to confess the truth. It was making you feel less lonely in the world. Perhaps it was love dictated by the fact you had no one else around. Perhaps you loved the way he worshipped you. Perhaps you loved him for the way he was making you feel so powerful and important. But at the end of the day, it was love. Not that you planned to say it out loud.
It was true that you hated weakness but Feyd-Rautha was yours. If he was to die, you’d die, too. You had no home to go to, no family member to turn to. All you had was him. Him and the dream of the life you two were supposed to live one day.
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You knew that the black colour was a bad choice for the planet like Arrakis. But you couldn’t imagine wearing anything else. As a Harkonnen you had to establish dominance in your House’s way. Your arrival dress had to be black and made of a flowy material with a semi-transparent veil to protect your skin from the hot rays of sunshine and the wind full of harsh sand and spice.
The very first step you took outside the ship nearly made you dizzy. It felt so odd after so many months to feel the sunlight on your skin and to see the colours while not being inside any building – even if the colours of Arrakis were not many.
“My Lady,” Astra and Cara followed you outside, both widening their big, black Harkonnen eyes at the sight of the desert, “are you alright?”
“Yes, my girls, I am,” you held their hands.
“Let’s go inside, na-baroness,” the medic joined you. “At this time of the day it is recommended not to go out,” he explained and you nodded before following him with your girls, guards and all the servants carrying your things. Feyd was already inside the palace with his uncle and dealing with an embarrassed and humiliated Rabban.
You looked up through your veil and examined the sight of the building in front of you. It was not much cosier than the Harkonnen fortress on Giedi Prime. On the inside the design was raw as well, but some part of you was already used to such an environment.
“My Lady,” one of the servants approached you. He had already been living there for quite some time now as he had come to Arrakis with Count Rabban. “Shall we prepare the rooms for you and na-baron or will you take the room that belonged to the previous Duke? Count Rabban did not take it, therefore we left it untouched,” he informed you and you froze for a second.
“My father’s room? It is left untouched?” You gasped.
“Yes, my Lady na-baroness, Duchess Atreides,” the man was bowing down so low you became concerned about his spine.
“Enough of the titles, take me there,” you ordered and then you turned around at your servants. “Wait here. I will let you know what room I am taking.”
“My Lady,” they all nodded as you followed the man alone. You didn’t want even Astra and Cara around you because you couldn’t tell what your reaction to your father’s chambers would be.
“Behind that door, na-baroness,” the servant bowed down and pointed at the doors. You pushed them and let them close behind you as your body trembled at the sight. You lifted the veil off of your face and looked around.
The room was arranged in a similar way as your father’s chamber back on Caladan. Duke Leto hated any form of mess and he had everything always put in its place. You wandered around and touched all the personal belongings – his chair, his desk… You froze at the sight of the pictures he had there. One picture was of him and Lady Jessica, the other one was of you and Paul. There was even a tiny picture from his wedding day with your mother. You remembered that picture very well as you had once asked him about it. He had told you he kept it out of respect for her and for you.
You had no idea he would still keep it even if you weren’t around.
You opened the desk. Someone had been rummaging inside – most likely to take the jewellery and the important documents. But the personal letters stayed. Personal letters and… a small doll.
You had given it to him at the age of four and asked him to take care of it. You didn’t expect he had been keeping it all these years.
“Oh, father…” you whispered and brought the doll close to your heart. “One day, it will be my daughter’s,” you decided and were about to walk away from the desk when you spotted an unfinished letter.
Carefully and curiously, you picked the paper up and read the few sentences that he had written down before taking a break and never being able to go back to it again.
Dear Daughter, I am aware of the anger and all the resentment you must be holding in your heart towards me. I am not asking for much but please, write back to us. If not for me, then do it for Paul. We both miss you dearly and we are worried when you are not answering our letters personally. All we want to know is if you are safe and…
Your eyes widened and your heart skipped a beat. So, they had been writing to you. All this time... And only Baron Harkonnen knew how many letters had been kept away from you. Of course he had lied to you. How could you be so stupid…?
You clenched your fist and then threw the crumpled paper back into the drawer. It didn’t change anything now. It brought you some peace, deep down, but it didn’t mean anything anymore. It wouldn't take back time.
You approached your father’s bed and spotted a robe laying there, discarded. He would wear that over his nightwear when he was leaving the room in the middle of the night due to an emergency. You assumed that the Harkonnen invasion was an emergency so sudden and violent that he had no time to put it on.
The robe was silk and dark green with the Atreides emblem on the chest. You sat on the edge of the bed and put the doll down on your lap before taking the robe in your hands and squeezing it as you brought it to your face. It still faintly smelled like him. It smelled like your father.
You buried your face in the silk and closed your eyes, remembering his embrace. For a short while it was almost as if he was still there, holding you and telling you it would be alright.
But it wasn’t alright. It hadn’t been alright and his daughter had died. You couldn’t tell when it happened exactly. Had Princess Atreides die in that cell on the night before her wedding? Or when she had been locked up after the Baron had told her about going to Arrakis and killing her family? Or maybe she had died somewhere in the meantime. Perhaps when she had seen Feyd taking an innocent life for the first time. It was really hard to tell but she was definitely gone now.
You startled at the sound of someone entering the room without knocking. It was Feyd – no one else would dare to do that.
“I’ve been looking for you,” he said and froze at the sight of you holding your father’s robe. “Are you alright?”
“Yes,” you stood up and threw the robe on the floor as you picked the doll up. “Burn it,” you ordered. “And we’ll take a different room. They can clean up this one,” you approached him and handed him the doll in your hands. He took it, confused.
“What is this?” He asked.
“Our next child will be a daughter and you will give it to her when she is born,” you told him sternly.
He snorted at first but then he realised that you had been dead serious. The doll held lots of significance and meaning to you and he didn’t even have any idea how much you trusted him with it.
Feyd nodded his head after a long while and he looked down at the doll, awkwardly holding her in his pale hands.
“My Lady, what is your decision?” The servant knocked upon the door and joined you.
“I don’t want this room, clean it up,” you told him.
“Do you want a room next to your husband’s, na-baroness?” He asked.
“No, we will share one room,” you told him and he bowed down before leaving you quietly. “Unless you want your own,” you laid your eyes on Feyd.
“I want what you want.”
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You were walking through the endless desert. It was like the oceans back on Caladan but instead of the water there was sand. The heat did not bother you and you did not feel tired at all. However, all this walking seemed pointless. You didn’t know where you were or where to go.
And then you spotted someone on the horizon. A tiny figure in a stillsuit and your heart skipped a beat. Was it one of the Fremen? You didn’t want to find out but your legs kept walking anyway as if you had no control over your body.
The figure remained motionless. After a while you spotted it was a man. You wondered why he was not reacting at all, seeing you walking towards him. Perhaps he was waiting for you. But why?
When you were close enough to see his face, you gasped. It was your brother, Paul Atreides, with his eyes blue from the spice, wearing a Fremen armour and he seemed to stare in the distance. Now you realised that he couldn’t see you even though you were facing him.
“Paul?” You asked as your body stopped walking with your face inches away from his. “Brother?”
He startled a little and furrowed his brows. Did he hear you…?
“Paul,” you said again and his eyes found yours.
“Sister,” his voice was different now. It was rough and held no affection. It made your blood run cold.
“What are we doing here?” You asked sadly. “Let’s go back home.”
“What is home now?”
“Caladan,” you explained.
“We cannot.”
You woke up abruptly and sat up, breathing heavily as you felt the sweat running down your spine and forehead. You had never experienced a dream so vivid and realistic as this one.
You assumed it was because of Arrakis. The heat could cause such a vision or perhaps it was all that buried deep down grief after losing your family. Being here now, in that palace where they had lived and died, it was making you feel odd.
Feyd woke up as well and you heard him reaching out for the knife underneath his pillow.
“It’s alright,” you told him. “I’ve just had a bad dream.”
“It’s your first night on Arrakis. Maybe it’s the spice messing with your head,” you felt his hand rubbing your back. “Lay down, come to me,” he whispered and you did.
You laid your head on his chest and hugged him tight like a scared child. Your heart was pounding and you felt dizzy. But you didn’t want to tell your husband what the dream was. He didn’t ask anyway.
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On the next day you were gathered in a conference room. Everyone was there, the Baron and Count Rabban, too. You hoped that they would go back to Giedi Prime but it seemed like they wanted to stay and ensure that the spice production would go back to normal. You tried not to make a face at that as you watched the hologram globe of Arrakis in front of you on display.
“Shouldn’t the Fremen delegation greet the new Governor of Arrakis?” You asked.
“The Fremen do not have negotiations with us anymore. We are in the state of war, na-baroness,” one of the engineers answered you with a nod of his head.
“Let it be war, then,” you nodded back.
“What is causing the biggest problems?” Your husband asked as he gave his brother a contemptuous look. “Apart from the bad governing of the resources.”
“The Fremen have a new leader, a mysterious Muad’Dib,” The Baron explained and for some reason a shiver went down your spine at the mention of the name. You didn’t know why because it didn’t sound sinister or dangerous.
“And what about him?” Feyd asked. You could hear he was bored of the meeting and wanted real action as soon as possible.
“They are destroying our machinery and killing our soldiers, slowing down the production. He is unstoppable. Like a shadow,” Rabban explained and Feyd snorted at him.
“My big scary brother failed to deal with one Fremen savage,” he drawled. “Instead of slaughtering them all.”
“And what would our Baroness do?” The Baron interrupted Feyd and stared at you with a smirk. Suddenly, the whole room laid their eyes on you and you blinked a few times, surprised.
“Why would you ask a woman that?” Rabban inquired and Feyd hissed at him for that remark.
“Because I want to know her insight. Our Baroness happens to have interesting ideas,” Baron teased, his squinted eyes never leaving yours.
“I would oppose slaughtering the Fremen,” you stated.
“I’ve told you, she’s just a woman,” Rabban laughed.
“She is the Governess of Arrakis and your na-baroness and you will respect her,” Feyd barked.
“Enough!” You banged the fist on the table and the sound echoed through the chamber full of the Harkonnen servants and engineers widening their eyes at you. “Both of you!” You snapped. “Acting like children,” you scolded. “I am not the Governess of Arrakis, Feyd,” you laid your eyes on him and he looked a bit taken aback by your outburst. “That title does not work that way. You’re the Governor and I am your wife. However,” you looked at the Baron again. He was smirking all that time. “I do not think slaughtering them will bring us profit. They know the desert and the spice more than we do. We need them as obedient allies. But in order to have them as allies, we have to defeat them and their will to fight. We need to hit them with aggression that they have not yet seen nor experienced in their worst nightmares,” you raised your chin up.
“And that aggression is Feyd-Rautha,” Baron nodded at your husband.
“If we have negotiations with the Fremen in the future, I’d like to be there,” you announced and Rabban snorted. You knew that he did not mean these things personally, he was just frustrated that he was being replaced by his brother and seeing that an off-world woman was holding more influence than him had to be rough for his ego.
“What’s so funny, brother?” Feyd asked him and you rolled your eyes. They were at it again. “The only thing I find funny is how my wife has more brains than you.”
“And why is that funny?” You asked him, irritated.
“That is enough indeed,” Baron raised his hand. “We all have better things to do,” he announced and everyone bowed their heads as he left the room.
You watched your husband and his brother leaving right behind him, still having an argument like little children. Then you took a deep breath in and stood up to go back to Astra and Cara.
However, when you left the room, Feyd grabbed his brother’s neck and pushed him down on the floor. He basically threw him at your feet and you were surprised that he had managed it so easily since Rabban was a big and strong man.
“You will kiss her shoe and show your na-baroness respect,” Feyd ordered, “as you beg for her forgiveness.”
You looked down as Rabban looked up, scared. As much as it brought you some satisfaction to have a big, strong Harkonnen count who was called Beast Rabban at your feet, you felt sorry for him, too. 
“Feyd, there is no need,” you looked at your husband.
“No, there is, because I say so,” he insisted and kicked his brother’s head. “He will kiss your shoe or die.”
“I said, there is no need,” you repeated, more sternly this time. “Your brother is not my enemy like he is not yours either,” you pointed out. “Stand up, Count Rabban,” you ordered the man.
Carefully and hesitantly he moved up, trying to avoid looking into your eyes.
“You shall remember the kindness I have given you,” you told him and he nodded. “Now, leave.”
You watched him walk away as fast as possible and then you looked at your husband. He wasn’t pleased but he was trying to hide it. You could tell when he was angry very easily from his facial expressions by now.
“Do not torment him. He might be useful,” you told him.
“He will do anything to keep his pathetic head on. He’s got no honour,” Feyd snorted at that. “He would kiss anyone’s shoe if his life depended on it.”
“Then he is more like me than I have expected,” you only said and walked past him, leaving him behind, surprised.
“You are not like him,” Feyd followed you as he grabbed your wrist. “You have honour.”
“Do I?” You chuckled and turned around to face him. “I did everything to survive. It had nothing to do with honour. I became a Harkonnen instead of doing what my Atreides pride was telling me to do and that was to kill myself before letting any of you hurt me or change me.”
“It is different,” he was trying to deny your words. You were confusing him now.
“You also do not have honour, Feyd-Rautha. The way you used to fight drugged warriors in the arena. It has nothing to do with honour,” you reminded him as his jaw clenched. “And you know what? I don’t care,” you shrugged your arms. “My father, he was an honourable man. And look where it has gotten him. We are too cunning for honour.”
“We?” Feyd asked.
“The Harkonnens,” you explained and cupped his face to pull his head down and place a kiss upon his forehead. “Now, go, weren’t you supposed to terrorise the poor Fremen?”
He smirked at you and leaned in to place a hungry kiss upon your lips as his hand caressed your womb.
“Be careful, my darling, come back to me in one piece from the treacherous desert,” you bid him farewell and kissed him one last time before going back to your chambers.
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Weeks had passed and the mysterious Muad’Dib remained uncaught, however the spice production came back to full efficiency. It was difficult to celebrate such victory, though, because you weren’t even sure if it was because of Feyd-Rautha being a good Governor or was it because of his uncle who still was present on Arrakis. Both him and Rabban. You wondered how things had been back on Giedi Prime – especially now, when all the important Harkonnens were on Arrakis.
You had your girls and your medic and much less nosy guards following you everywhere. The Arrakeen Palace was giving you lots of freedom and safety but it was also a much more boring place than the fortress on Giedi Prime. It was full of ghosts, too – you couldn’t stop thinking your family had been slayed in that very place.
You kept dreaming of Paul each and every night. It was making you feel weary and frustrated at this point. You didn’t want Feyd to know so you often would leave the bed quietly in the middle of the night and walk outside to sit on the balcony. There was something fascinating about the desert; it was so calm yet dangerous. By day it was too hot to just stare and admire but at night it was peaceful and with no one around to bother you.
Tonight you were standing and admiring the moon in your nightgown, with your hand caressing your swollen womb. It was getting bigger and bigger each day and you could feel the child move now. The medic assured you he was placed properly and growing healthy. You wondered if your son would be born on Arrakis.
“What’s wrong?” Feyd’s voice made you turn around. He was standing by the entrance to the balcony and staring at you.
“I can’t sleep,” you lied. You could but you didn’t want to. You didn’t want to dream of Paul.
“Again?” Feyd sighed and approached you. He stood behind you and leaned your body on his chest. It made you sigh out of relief and he placed his hands on your abdomen. “Perhaps the spice is doing you harm.”
“No, the medic would have noticed that,” you shook your head. “Perhaps it’s your son keeping me awake,” you made up a believable excuse and Feyd chuckled.
“And what are you doing here? Staring at the sand?”
“I don’t expect you to understand the beauty of the desert,” you teased. “But yes, the sand, the moon, everything.”
“When I will become the Baron, we will have a little tour and visit every planet under Harkonnen rule,” he whispered into your ear. “You will see many beautiful things, my darling pet.”
“And when will that be?” You snapped, frustrated. “In ten years? A hundred?” You snorted.
“What are you talking about?” Feyd took a step back and leaned on the railing to take a better look at your face but you remained staring in the distance.
“What is he still doing here? I thought Arrakis was ours. Yet, he is here and it feels as if we are being supervised. Meanwhile, Giedi Prime remains without protection,” you drawled through gritted teeth.
“If you were him, would you leave us two to each other?” Feyd asked.
“Are you by his side again?” You finally looked at him, angrily. “He gave you the planet to govern and you’re defending him again?”
“I am not defending him,” Feyd got angry, too, at your words. “But it is obvious why he stayed here. He knows we might be plotting. He needs to keep an eye on things.”
“I have already plotted,” you lowered your voice and went back to staring at the moon.
Feyd kept looking at you in silence for a while before he finally spoke up again.
“And what is that?”
“He shall be slayed by night alongside most of the guards and servants. We will say it was a nighttime assassination attack by Muad’Dib and his people. They targeted the Harkonnen nobility and you were too busy saving your pregnant wife to help your uncle,” you whispered.
“Everyone will know the truth, it's too obvious,” Feyd told you. “It's only giving us an alibi for those who want to believe in it.”
“Of course they will suspect what really happened but they will not care. You showed them your worth in the arena and you brought back the full efficiency of the spice production. The Harkonnen lords will give you a chance. I am sure they’ve already grown tired and weary of the Baron,” you kept convincing him.
“What if Muad’Dib suddenly decides to show up and deny?”
You sighed and looked at him again, furiously.
“Just admit that you don’t want him dead, because in some way I cannot understand… you love him,” you hissed at him.
“Love?” It was the first time you heard him use that word and it brought a chill down your spine. It sounded so off and scary when your husband said it out loud. “I don’t know what that pathetic feeling is,” he assured you.
“I can see that,” you raised an eyebrow at him and walked away to leave the balcony and go back to your bedroom.
You were hurt, angry and frustrated and it was starting to bring tears to your eyes but you didn’t want him to see that.
Your husband followed you to the bedroom. In the way his footsteps were even heavier than usual, you spotted his annoyance as well.
“What do you expect of me? You’re so impatient, woman,” he started once the doors closed behind him. “You want everything and you want it now. I said I’d do it, I swore I’d do it but you admitted yourself we have to wait longer. If he dies here at night, do you think the noble lords of Giedi Prime will accept that so easily?”
“Then slay the ones who refuse to accept you as the successor!” You turned around with the rage making your blood boil. “Slay everyone standing in our way, as you promised. Do you want our son to be born in a world that he is manipulating for his own gain? Do you want to be his dog following the orders for the next few years? I am tired of playing the games with him on his own chess board. I want to make my own game, my own rules, my own board!” You tried to keep your voice down in case someone would spy on you but it was difficult with all that anger pouring out of you.
In one swift move, Feyd grabbed your chin and squeezed your cheeks as he brought your face so close to his that your noses were rubbing each other. There was so much anger in his eyes that the old you would start trembling out of fear for her life but the new you didn’t even flinch.
“Keep your voice down, we will do it,” he spat out.
“No,” you mumbled. “You will do it. You’re the hand that slays,” you reminded him and he kissed you so hungrily that you became breathless.
“I still want to kill you sometimes,” he confessed between one kiss and another as he led you back to your bed and laid you down on the mattress. “Choke you, slit your pretty little throat, watch you squirm under me as you bleed to death.”
“Whatever turns you on, my darling,” you chuckled at him as he looked at you sternly.
“If I hurt you, I’d kill myself right after. I’m bound to you forever,” he confessed and you smiled gently.
You didn’t want to tease him that after all, he did know what love was. After all, he did feel it. But you knew that he’d hate being confronted with the truth.
“If something happened to you, I would want to die alongside you, too,” you told him. “You’re the only one I have and none of my ambitions matter without you by my side.”
It was true. You didn't want to rule alone. In fact, you didn't want to ever feel lonely in your life again.
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You were sitting next to Paul and watching the sunset in silence. In your dreams you would always meet him in the desert. Nothing else seemed to exist on Arrakis in the dreamworld – except for you and him.
“Why do you haunt me?” You asked and laid your eyes on his angry face. He was always so angry these days.
You hated Paul from your dreams. He was different. There was no kindness and gentleness about him anymore. If you were supposed to be haunted by his ghost, you’d rather be haunted by the brother you had remembered instead.
“I am not here for you,” Paul snorted and you furrowed your brows. Then he looked down at your swollen womb and you instinctively protected it with your hands.
“What do you mean?” You gasped.
“The spawn inside you shares my blood on both sides,” he answered mysteriously, which confused you greatly but you decided not to give it a second thought. After all, it was just a dream. “No, it is not,” Paul smirked viciously at you, as if he was able to read your thoughts.
“Get up,” you heard Feyd’s rough voice as his hand shook your arm. You woke up abruptly and sat up, trying to calm yourself after the dream.
“What’s going on?” You asked and looked around the dark room.
“Come with me,” your husband looked very pleased with himself as he pulled you out of the bed.
“What are you–”
“Shh,” he put his finger over his mouth as he led you outside.
You gasped at the sight of the bodies scattered all over the corridor of the palace. Servants and guards with their throats slit, laying in poodles of their own blood.
“Have you done that?” You asked quietly and Feyd nodded. “My girls…” you gasped.
“I haven’t touched your pets,” he assured you and stopped in front of the doors leading to the Baron’s chambers.
“Have you killed him…?” You were both excited and terrified of the outcome if the answer was yes. But, most importantly, you were in shock.
“Not yet,” Feyd answered as he pushed the doors open in front of you.
Not sure what his words meant, you entered the chamber carefully and spotted the Baron on his bed, letting out loud and raspy breaths. His life support machinery was no longer attached to him; you assumed Feyd had decided to give him a slow death.
You looked at your husband and spotted a sadistic sparkle in his eye as he was visibly enjoying the sounds and the view. He put his arm around you and walked you closer to the Baron’s bed.
That old and sick man looked pathetic at that moment and for a short while you even felt sorry for him. His eyes widened even further at the sight of you as he raised one of his hands towards you but you took a step back.
You didn’t know what to expect of him on his deathbed. Some part of you craved for him to admit his defeat and name you a worthy successor of the Harkonnen throne. Some other part of you expected him to curse you and your whole bloodline, which would be quite justified.
However, you certainly did not expect the sheer desperation and debasement.
“P-please…” He could barely speak. “Please, help me,” he tried to reach out for you.
You didn’t feel sorry for him anymore. You felt disgusted.
“You’re a weakling,” you smirked at him. “You called my father weak but I am sure that he did not beg like a dog on his deathbed. I am sure he died with dignity.”
“Please, help me…” He coughed out. “Help me and I will make your son an Emperor…”
“I do not need you to make my son an Emperor,” you laughed with contempt. “I am to become The Baroness Harkonnen; commanding the largest army and possessing the biggest wealth in the galaxy.”
“F-Feyd, I was like a father to you…” He searched for his nephew’s cruel eyes now, giving up on asking for your compassion and pity. “My boy…”
“Like a father, you say,” Feyd drawled. “I couldn’t wait to kill you for so many years now.”
“Please…”
“Oh, shut him up, how long will it take for him to die?” You sighed with an eye-roll as Feyd nodded his head at you and grabbed the short knife attached to his hip.
“Farewell, dear uncle,” he smiled smugly as he slit the Baron’s throat.
You watched mesmerised, without even blinking. It felt like a dream more than reality.
“The Arrakeen Palace will be considered cursed for all the Barons and Dukes from now on,” you only said.
Without a word, Feyd dropped the blade and fell on his knees in front of you, pulling you close by your hips and burying his face in the fabric of your nightgown right where your womb was. You knew what he wanted. A praise, an approval, a blessing.
“My Baroness,” he breathed out.
“Stand tall, my Baron,” you caressed his head and he looked up. His eyes sparkled in the moonlight and you cupped his chin to caress his full lips with your thumb. “You’ve made me proud and happy, my darling,” you assured him. 
He nodded at you and collected the discarded blade from the floor. It was important not to leave any trace. You both went back to your chambers and laid down in bed, pretending to be asleep – too excited to actually be able to drift off. This time you didn’t feel guilty even a little bit like after the death of the harpies. This time it didn’t even feel like murder or taking another human being’s life. This time it felt like nothing but relief.
You watched the sunrise through the window with your head on your husband’s chest and his hand rubbing your back, waiting for the remaining servants’ screams to signal the beginning of the new era.
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There were screams indeed. People were running, yelling, banging on your door. Both Feyd and you acted surprised and startled at the news but Astra and Cara had to be the only people in the palace who actually believed your story. The medic inspected the Baron’s body and started to wonder if it really had been Muad’Dib’s work since the cuts did not remind of the Fremen weapons. Feyd only hissed at him so the medic stopped any further insinuations.
Count Rabban’s behaviour surprised you the most as he was following his brother around and seeming to act like the most loyal and obedient subject. He had quickly realised it was the best chance of survival for him. He hadn’t questioned anything so far and simply followed every word leaving his younger brother’s mouth.
Everything was a mess and chaos on that day but it was mostly Feyd dealing with it, basking in his new title and glory, as you were sitting on your bed with terrified Astra and Cara, holding them both and assuring them of their safety.
“How can you not be worried, na-baroness? I mean, Baroness?” Astra widened her eyes. “If Muad’Dib was here last night… Oh, I don’t even want to imagine what would happen if he went inside your chambers instead…”
“My husband would defend me,” you kissed her forehead and then you kissed Cara’s.
“What if he comes back?” Cara was shaking out of fear and you felt bad for making them feel like this but you couldn’t tell them the truth. “Now, when they know that we have fewer guards around?”
“We will be prepared this time,” you squeezed their hands. “My girls, I am sorry for being insensitive but I shall get dressed in mourning attire now and finally join my husband to help him with the officialties.”
Every lady travelled with a mourning dress just in case. Yours was a combination of black silk and black armour pieces with chains, connected to the matching headpiece. It looked dignified and intimidating – exactly how you wanted it to look like. You had already dreamt of The Baron’s death while planning your trip. Therefore the mourning dress you had chosen was accurate to your new role of The Baroness.
It sounded so good. For the upcoming days you would get drunk on the way people would address you. And then, when you'd finally be back on Giedi Prime, there would be a lavish celebration and official event for you two becoming the new Baron and Baroness. You couldn't wait for that day.
You smiled to yourself in the mirror and fixed the headpiece for one last time as you adjusted the Atreides signet ring on your pinky finger. On your pointing finger there was a huge ring with the Harkonnen emblem. And hidden between the folds of your dress and attached to the armour piece on your hip was the blade your husband had given you on the day of his birthday. No one could see it but you could reach for it swiftly in the case of emergency.
You joined Feyd in the conference room and everyone straightened at the sight of you. They always would but this time it felt different. You were the one holding the power – and they respected you for you, not for the fact that you were under protection of The Baron.
“Baroness,” they bowed down and went back to work, avoiding your gaze.
“How are things going?” You approached Feyd as he looked you up and down with a smirk. You put your hand on his chest.
“I sent Rabban back on Giedi Prime with our uncle’s body,” he told you and held your hand to lay a kiss upon it. “He will take care of the affairs there until we finish our business on Arrakis. I want to take care of that Muad’Dib rat before returning home and finding someone worthy to replace me as the Governor here. Rabban will also send us more Harkonnen troops since we have lost many guards last night,” he informed you in an official manner.
“We must avenge our late Lord Baron,” you clenched your jaw as you nodded. His eyes sparkled with mockery as he pretended to look worried.
You were sure that most people in that room had known the truth but they kept their poker faces on and allowed you to play out this little scene.
“My Lord,” one of the engineers raised his voice, concerned. Feyd turned around and you both stared at the hologram of the Arrakis globe. Red dots started to appear on the orbit. “We have guests,” the engineer explained. “The ships are definitely not ours.”
“Who is it?” Feyd barked at him. “Find that out, we are not expecting anyone,” he looked at you, a little concerned.
You were not pleased with the idea of guests now, out of all times, either. 
“Who dares to interrupt our peace unannounced on the day after our late Lord Baron’s tragic death?” You asked out loud, playing your mourning role the best you could.
What a mockery it was that you had to be hiding all the grief after your actual family but had to display fake tears for the man you had hated with every fibre of your being.
“M-my Lord, my Lady…” the engineer turned around with his eyes widened, “it’s the Emperor himself… The whole imperial delegation.”
You and Feyd looked at each other.
“It took them days to get here. There is no way they are here because of last night’s incident,” Feyd pointed out. “Still, I do not understand. I have brought the spice production back to full efficiency. What could be the reason for his visit?”
You moved uncomfortably as your son kicked your rib. As if he too knew of the importance of this sudden imperial audience. It would be the first time you’d greet someone of such importance as The Harkonnen Baroness and it would be the first time you’d see the Emperor face to face. He had visited your father a few times on Caladan but children had not been allowed near their meetings.
“We have to greet him and find out,” you took a deep breath in, preparing yourself mentally for the first challenge in your new role.
You shot Feyd a glance and he nodded at you, reassuringly. With him by your side, it couldn’t go that bad, you tried to convince yourself. His presence was equipping you with courage and determination you had not known before.
Everything you were doing now, you were doing for the two of you and your future. Nothing else mattered.
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MASTERLIST
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ggukiepie · 9 months
Text
one of your girls (jungkook x reader) (part 1)
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we don't gotta be in love, no i don't wanna be the one, no i just wanna be one of your girls tonight ~ i wanna take your light inside dim me down, snuff me out ~ give me tough love leave me with nothin' when i come down
pairing: fwb!jk x oc, brief jimin x oc
tags: smut, angst, a little bit of fluff (like teeny tiny)
warnings: two smut scenes, kissing, marking (hickeys), fingering, brief handjob, protected sex, slight dom!jk, sub!oc, praise, dirty talk, grinding, edging, oral (f. & m. receiving), throat fucking, dacryphilia, spit kink, brief masturbation (m.), squirting, brief anal play, back shots, cum shot, multiple orgasms (you'll see), aftercare
word count: 5.8k
a/n: been in my feels lately i had to write it out lol; wrote this in one sitting my hands actually hurt omg; inspired by the song "one of your girls" (ik don't roast me idk why it's stuck in my head fml); if this gets taken down then bye bye i literally just wrote it here directly lmaooooo; anw enjoy !!!! part 2 / drabble i (flashback)
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
You knew what you were getting yourself into the night you said yes to Jungkook. You knew you'd fall for him, be under his spell. You knew you'd end up getting hurt. You prepared yourself, you really did, yet you were still surprised when you woke up each morning and he wasn't beside you in bed. You felt your heart break a little bit more when you saw him with another girl, whether she'd be one of your friends or a complete stranger to you.
You tried to guard your heart. Reminded yourself to prepare for the worst. Forced yourself not to fall, not to be blindsided. I'm just having a little fun, you told yourself for the nth time.
jk: u busy tonight?
you: not really! just writing a paper that's due next week
That was sent hours ago and you mentally cringe at your reply. You always find yourself oversharing to Jungkook when you didn't even need to. You wanted to make it seem like your whole situationship was just casual. Like you didn't care. He rarely shared much about his personal life and so should you. But that hardly happened. You didn't want him to think that you cared, that you were clingy or waiting for him to text. You didn't even wait five minutes before replying and he hasn't even texted back.
You know what his text means. He wants to fuck and that's it. But he doesn't say it outright. No, never. He wants to make it seem like he cares, that he wants to know how your night is going. But he just wants to know if you're free to fuck and once you reply, he'll keep that as a reminder in the back of his mind, like he has a mental list of girls he can sort through at the end of the night when he's bored or when he wants to have a little bit of fun.
You know you're just one of his girls on his roster and you're fine with that. You're not his girlfriend and he's not your boyfriend. Though it does seem like that on some days, which is when you get the courage to not reply to his texts. When you try to shut him out and move on. He usually shows up outside your lecture hall with a cup of coffee in hand, bunny smile on his face as he waits for you to walk into the hallway. Like he's waiting for you, picking you up from class like a good and loving boyfriend.
It's all for show and it's only to get himself on your good side again. It works every time. You don't question yourself anymore. Jungkook likes the chase, likes the adrenaline of going after girls and trying to get them to fall for him, or sleep with him, or whatever. It's all the same to him.
You sigh again as you check your phone, hoping for a reply but knowing he won't text back. It's a Friday night and he's probably at some party. You go through your texts and open the conversation with your best friend.
jihyo: see u later! im picking u up so u better be ready >:(
You can't help but laugh at her insistence. Jihyo knows what you're going through since you tell her everything. You tell her you don't care though, that you're not looking for a relationship right now and your "thing" with Jungkook is just casual. But you know she sees right through your lies. It's even more obvious when you ghost all your friends and lock yourself in your apartment every night. She's trying to make you forget and move on and have some actual fun so you indulge her every time.
You get ready in less than an hour and actually put some effort into your appearance. You're not sure which party you're going to but you won't be surprised if Jungkook will be there as well. Maybe if you look hot enough he'll choose you tonight.
You hear a knock on your door and open it immediately, finding Jihyo laughing at something her boyfriend has just said. Most of the time you end up hanging out with her and Mingyu because she's always dragging you with her to keep you from being lonely. You don't mind it though because they're fun people to be with. Even though Mingyu is Jungkook's roommate and best friend. But Mingyu isn't anything like Jungkook. He looks at Jihyo like she's hung up the stars and moon. Loves her with all his heart and doesn't leave her second guessing. You always wonder why him and Jungkook are friends when they're so different.
Jihyo turns to smile at you, but it's still the lovestruck smile she gave Mingyu just seconds ago. You know you have the same kind of smile reserved for Jungkook. You wish you didn't but at the same time you're glad you do, like you have a part of yourself only Jungkook can see. Even though he doesn't do the same.
"You look so hot tonight!" she squeals as she pulls you in a hug. You laugh and roll your eyes, making eye contact with Mingyu as he nods his head in greeting. Jihyo steps back and grabs your hand, dragging you out your apartment so fast you barely have time to lock the door behind you. "Let's go before all the good drinks are gone."
It's a short but fun walk to the house where the party is being held. You find yourself laughing with Jihyo and Mingyu the whole time. They're the type of couple that doesn't make third wheeling a bore.
Loud music blares in your ears the moment you step inside. You feel your heels sticking to the floor. A typical frat house throwing a typical Friday night party. You immediately take shots with Jihyo and Mingyu. You need it to be able to survive the night since you already feel yourself tensing up at the possibility of Jungkook being in the same place as you.
You spot your other friends and hangout with them for the rest of the night. It's when you're playing beer pong with Jimin as your partner do you see Jungkook at the other side of the room. He's talking to some girl which is nothing new. It shouldn't phase you but it does. You thought you were going to be his pick for the night since he texted you a while ago.
You feel your heart fall at the sight of them, your chest physically hurting that you make Jimin throw the ball twice for the both of you since you can't focus. You feel all the fun and happiness slowly leave your body. You feel your stomach churn at the way he's got her trapped against the wall, tattooed arm placed beside her head, mouth whispering right against her ear. She's smiling and giggling at whatever Jungkook is telling her. You wish that were you.
"Forget about him," Jimin mutters in your ear. He's watching your beer pong opponents take their turn as you're watching Jungkook and the girl.
You shake your head at Jimin, turning your head to smile at him just to make it seem like you're okay. Just like Jihyo, he sees right through you.
Jimin's another close friend of Jungkook. They're not so different. Jimin likes to sleep around but he makes it clear that he doesn't want anything serious. Always nice and gentle with the girls he sleeps with. Jungkook makes it seem like you're his and only his. You wonder again why they're friends.
"Seriously, Y/N," Jimin says, a little bit of urgency in his tone. It's probably the look of longing on your face that raises concern in your friend. Everyone sees how broken you look when you catch Jungkook with another girl.
"I know," you say after a while. You talk just a little bit loud enough to be heard over the music. "Jungkook and I just sleep with each other. It's casual and that's it."
You hear Jimin sigh. He nods his head and it's his turn to throw the dirty ping pong ball. You've had this conversation with him and Jihyo numerous times already, sometimes it's the both of them and sometimes it's on separate occasions. You say the same thing every time. You think your friends are starting to give up on you. Maybe you should as well.
You force yourself to have fun for the rest of the night, always trying to be in a room where Jungkook isn't. You're not sure if he's spotted you. You don't know which hurts more—him not spotting you because he doesn't even bother looking for you in the crowd, or him spotting you but not talking to you because you're not his choice for the night. Either way, he doesn't care. You know he doesn't but you wish you did. You thought you'd catch his attention with the black dress you're wearing. Or with the way your hair is styled. But it doesn't work and you tell yourself that it's okay. You always see him in your peripheral though, either talking to someone or flirting with that girl.
You decide to leave when you see Jungkook leaving as well, fingers tangled with the girl's. She looks like a giggling mess and you can't blame her. Everyone falls for Jungkook's charms. You try not to dwell on the fact that they're going to have sex.
It's Jimin who walks you home. He can tell you're sad so he talks about his day and his classes, avoiding Jungkook's name even though you're positive that they hung out today. Jungkook's intertwined in so many people's lives it's hard to leave him out. But Jimin makes an effort just to distract you. You're grateful for it though and he keeps up the act all the way to your apartment. He asks if he can use your bathroom and you say yes, mindlessly changing into your pajamas once the bathroom door closes behind you. You thought you'd have a little bit more time to finish changing but you suddenly hear Jimin swear behind you. You live in a little studio apartment so there's not much room to hide.
"Oh fuck— Shit," he says. You turn around laughing to see him with his hand over his eyes. "Sorry," he mumbles.
You're in your underwear but you don't mind. "It's not like you haven't seen me like this before," you chuckle.
"Still," he reasons.
Because you're stupid and heartbroken and hurt, you walk up to Jimin and gently grab his wrist, bringing his arm down to his side. You look at him looking at anywhere else but you. Eventually he looks down at your body for a split second and you laugh at him.
"We shouldn't," he whispers.
You shrug your shoulders. "Just a little bit of fun, right?" you ask with a smile on your face. "Like old times?" you giggle.
Jimin lets out a scoff but it's more of a laugh. Like he can't believe you're both doing this again. "You sure you're not drunk?" he asks as he makes eye contact with you. Bingo. You got him.
"Nope," you say sweetly.
"But Jungkook?"
You roll your eyes to mask the hurt. "Don't care."
Jimin looks at you intently to make sure you're not bluffing. While you wait for his answer you unclasp your bra and let it fall down your shoulders, exposing yourself to him. His eyes widen at the sight.
"Okay," he breathes out. He suddenly holds you by the waist to place you on the kitchen counter. It has you giggling at him.
"Eager?" you ask when he starts kissing your neck. You feel him drag his teeth across your skin, like he's thinking if he should mark you up or not. You stretch your neck out even more and feel him biting at your skin, sure to leave a bruise.
"Just excited," he mumbles against your neck. You feel him smile.
You unzip his pants while he's busy sucking your nipples. He's hard already when you start pumping your hand up and down his cock.
"Feels good, baby," he moans in your ear. You're still wearing your underwear but Jimin doesn't mind, just pushes it to the side to insert two of his fingers inside your pussy.
"Oh," you choke out. He finds your spot right away and rubs his fingers against it. He doesn't make you come, just fingers you to make sure you're prepped. It's quick when he takes his fingers out and grabs the condom in the back pocket of his jeans. You watch him tear the packet open and roll the condom down his length.
You both don't say anything else as he pushes his cock past your tight walls. Doesn't give you a moment before he starts pounding, his skin slapping against yours.
It's always like this with Jimin—just quick and easy and no feelings attached. You both don't do it much, it happens at the most random times. Usually when you want to forget or when he's stressed from school. And after this you're both back to being friends. It's never awkward. You wish it were like this with Jungkook instead.
"Jimin," you moan when he starts rubbing your clit. "Gonna come."
"Go ahead, baby," he breathes out, placing a soft kiss on your cheek and leaving his lips there. You push yourself to release and Jimin follows right after. You're both breathing heavily when he pulls out, taking off the condom and throwing it in the bin. He zips up his pants and starts looking for something on your bed. You're still trying to catch your breath when you feel a shirt being put over your head. Jimin's sweet like this—does aftercare in the most platonic way possible.
"There," he says after helping you wear the shirt he found. He doesn't know it belongs to Jungkook. You don't think he minds if he does though.
"Thank you," you say quietly and give him a small smile.
"Anytime. I'll see you around, okay?" He kisses your forehead and you watch him leave your apartment.
The silence engulfs you and you think you should feel disgusted with yourself—that you're pining over a guy but you just had sex with another. With his close friend out of all people. But you push the thought to the back of your mind as you jump down from the kitchen counter and walk into your bathroom. You're just like Jungkook, you tell yourself. Just casually sleeping around and nothing else. He doesn't care and you don't either. You feel a teeny bit better.
You take a warm shower to wash all the remnants from tonight. You actually take your time just to clear your jumbled up mind. It's almost 30 minutes later when you step out and check your phone while you're drying off, heartbeat stopping at a text you've received almost an hour ago.
jk: u up?
jk: hey reply to me :(
jk: coming over
Your eyes widen at the last text. It was sent just 10 minutes ago. You don't know where he's coming from but the campus isn't that big so he'll probably be here soon. You quickly finish drying off and change into comfortable clothes. You hear a knock on the door the moment you finish changing. You take a deep breath before walking to the door and opening it.
You notice Jungkook's wearing the same clothes from the party but his shirt is a bit wrinkled. You think he just came from the girl's place. Probably fucked her and is here now because he's not satisfied. You should feel disgusted and mad but you're not. You're no better. You just slept with his friend.
"Hi," you mutter.
He smiles at you and leans in to kiss you on the lips. "Hey, sweetheart." It has you swooning.
You step to the side to let him in and he walks straight to your bed, sitting down to take off his shoes before lying down comfortably. You follow him and sit down on your bed right by his waist. He stretches out his arm to drape it over your thighs and you start tracing his tattoos absentmindedly. This is your usual routine.
"Did you stay in all night?" he asks. Just a little bit of conversation before he does what he's really here for. At least he has a little bit of decency. You don't mind though, it makes you think that he cares about you when he asks things like this.
You shake your head and smile at him. "Nah, Jihyo and Mingyu dragged me to that frat party." You can tell he's trying to hide his surprise.
"Oh, I didn't see you there," he mumbles.
"It's okay." You shrug. "There were a lot of people."
"We could've played beer pong together, I know you like doing that every time you're out."
Your heart clenches at his remark. You're surprised and hurt every time he remembers little things about you. "I was with Jimin, don't worry." Jungkook doesn't know the double meaning to it.
He nods and runs his fingers across your thighs. "Missed you. Sorry I didn't reply to your text earlier, got caught up in something." You know that's a lie. "Just got back from the party too, that's why I came here late." Another lie.
You nod and smile as if you believe him. And you force yourself to because it's easier than knowing the truth. It's silent for a moment before he mumbles c'mere and brings you on top of his lap.
"Missed this," he says quietly as he squeezes your thighs. His hands trail up your waist till he's squeezing your tits beneath the shirt you're wearing. You start grinding on his cock, getting out of breath too quickly. You missed this too. It's been a week since you last had sex with Jungkook which is a long time for the both of you.
"Kook," you pant. He's pinching your nipples knowing that's where you're most sensitive.
"I know, sweetheart. Take your shirt off for me, hm?"
You nod your head dumbly and do as you're told, watching Jungkook stare at your body. He stops moving beneath you and you're about to ask what's wrong when he brings his hand up to touch the hickey on your neck that Jimin left.
"Who's this from?" he asks. You can't tell if he's mad or just curious. Jungkook isn't showing any emotions on his face and you're starting to get nervous.
"Just..." You think if you should tell him the truth. You look into his eyes and try to see if there's any semblance of care. You don't know. You really can't tell. Then your eyes trails down his body, to his neck and the wrinkly white shirt he's wearing. There's a red stain on the collar and you know it's lipstick. From the girl he slept with earlier. "Someone," you finally mumble.
"Someone?" He continues rubbing the spot gently until he presses down on it with his thumb. He doesn't press down too hard, but it's with enough force to have you hissing slightly.
"It's from Jimin," you finally say. He doesn't say anything but raise an eyebrow at your reply. You don't know if he already knows that you and Jimin have slept together. He doesn't look so surprised, or maybe he is and he's just really good at schooling his expressions.
He makes eye contact with you again and you feel his hand going to the back of your head, grabbing a handful of your hair to press your lips against his. The kiss feels urgent and rushed, his tongue instantly slipping in your mouth and tangling with yours. You're on top of him yet you feel defenseless as he holds you by your hair and kisses you hard. You let Jungkook do as he pleases and forget about the little conversation you just had. You start grinding on his cock again and he reciprocates this time, hips moving against yours.
Before you know it, he rolls you over and pins your arms above your head. You stare at him with wide eyes and he smirks at you in return. He holds your wrists with one hand and takes off your shorts and underwear with the other. He's fully dressed while you're not and you know you're at his mercy. He knows this too as he spreads your thighs apart with his hand.
"Keep your hands there," he whispers. You hold your bed frame for good measure. You just want to please him. He trails kisses down your body, from your neck to your nipples to your tummy. He stops by your thighs and you feel his breath against your skin. You squirm beneath Jungkook to get him to do something, to touch you and pleasure you. He shakes his head, still with that damn smirk on his face. He starts kissing your thighs, close to your pussy just to tease you.
"Didn't know you and Jimin have a thing going on," he says against your skin. You shiver at the vibrations his voice provides.
You feel Jungkook bite down on your inner thighs. "We don't," you choke out. He scoffs and starts kissing your pussy. Just light kisses that start making you crazy because you just want his mouth on you. "We're just friends," you say weakly.
He looks up from where he's laying between your legs. "Like us?"
Us.
You know what he means but at the same time you don't. You're friends with Jimin like you're friends with Jungkook. But you don't long for Jimin like you do for Jungkook. You don't yearn for Jimin the same way, don't look for him in every place you're at, don't pine for his affection or his touches. Jimin isn't like Jungkook and you both know that. You just don't know if you're different from the other girls Jungkook fucks.
"No," you say truthfully. It's said with defeat and desperation because you know he's not going to touch you till you answer him. "Not like us."
You know Jungkook won't pry anymore because he finally starts licking your pussy, starting with your outer lips until his tongue is inside your hole licking every crevice. Then he starts sucking your clit and that's when you truly lose it, legs going around his head to keep him against your cunt.
"Fuck," you almost scream. You're so close already that you should feel embarrassed but you're not. Jungkook knows your body too well. No one holds a candle to how good he eats you out. "Please," you whimper.
"Please what, sweetheart?"
"Please make me come!" you beg. "Need it, need it so much." You starting grinding your hips against his mouth.
"You're so desperate," he chuckles. It's said meanly but the comment flies over your head. You don't care anymore; you just want some sort of release. "But not yet."
You suddenly feel cold because Jungkook removes his mouth from you, standing up and getting out of the bed to remove his clothing. You continue holding the bed frame above you because you want to be good for him. You watch him strip his clothes off till he's naked just like you, tattooed hand wrapping around his cock.
It's long and thick and it splits you open every time he fucks you. You really don't know how you manage to take him every time.
Jungkook is so mean and unfair with the way he's teasing you right now, pleasuring himself while you lay on the bed. You're about to open your mouth to complain when he finally nods his head, motioning you to get up. "Kneel. Hands behind your back, okay?"
You nod your head and get in position on the bed, head tilting up to look at his cock. It's so hard and the tip is already leaking. You just want your mouth around him.
"Open," he says.
You open your mouth and stick your tongue out, just the way Jungkook likes. As expected, he spits directly into your mouth and you swallow right away.
"Good girl. Now suck."
He brings his cock to your lips and you immediately start sucking. You push your length all the way in till you feel him at the back of your throat.
"Gotta take all of me in, pretty. Or else I won't fuck your little pussy."
You know Jungkook takes his threats seriously so you back up a little to catch your breath before taking him in your mouth again. God, he's so big and thick your jaw is already starting to feel sore. But you power through and keep taking him in your mouth until your nose touches his tummy. You try not to gag around him but it's no use. You also feels your eyes tearing up.
Jungkook doesn't care you're struggling. In fact, he loves it because he's got that stupidly handsome smile on his face. He strokes your cheeks for a while and you try to even out your breathing.
"I wanna fuck your throat, sweetheart. Can you take it?" he asks sweetly.
You know it's a rhetorical question but you nod anyways, as much as you could with a dick down your throat.
"Let me in then."
You close your eyes and relax your throat even more. Jungkook holds your head then and pushes you towards him even deeper. You're helpless since your hands are behind your back. You gag again and start feeling lightheaded.
"There we go," he finally says once his whole length is in your mouth. You feel the tip down your throat. You're struggling so much but you try not to move. You just want to please him. "Gonna move now," he mumbles and starts moving his hips. You let him fuck your throat for God knows how long. You're full on crying when he stops and withdraws his length halfway out your mouth. You take the time to gasp for air and you even cough a little, head bowing down to regain your breathing. You faintly hear Jungkook laugh above you.
"I'm not yet done, love. Was just feeling nice enough to give you a little breather."
You nod your head and look up at him, mouth opening wide to let him know you're ready again.
"You just let me do whatever I want, huh?" he chuckles. You're not sure if he means something else but to you it does. You willingly let Jungkook do anything to you. Even if it results in heartbreak.
He stares at you for a while and spreads the spit and precum that's on your lips. "So messy." Then he's back to inserting his length inside your mouth. The glide is smoother this time since you're already prepped. "There we go," he groans out. He stays still and feels the imprint of his dick on your throat. "Look so pretty for me."
Jungkook starts moving again but thankfully his pace is slow this time. You're sure you'll have a sore throat by tomorrow.
"Keep your eyes open, okay? Wanna see you cry."
You look at him while he's fucking your mouth, looking at the way his cock moves in your throat. You're starting to lose your breath and you think Jungkook could tell as well because he grants you reprieve and steps back. You're coughing more this time, hands catching yourself in front of you. You barely get enough time to regain your breathing before you feel Jungkook grabbing your head and bringing your lips to his.
"Did so good for me," he says against your mouth.
You're trembling in his hold and you grab his arms to steady yourself. "Fuck me please," you try to say but your voice comes out hoarse and ragged.
He kisses your cheek and then your jaw. "I will, don't worry," he coos. "Always gonna give you what you want." Another lie. You know that's not true.
You're putty in his hands as he maneuvers you to the position he wants to fuck you in, which is on your hands and knees with your ass high in the air.
"Just like that," he whispers. He pushes down on your shoulders even more so that you're wide and open for him. He starts rubbing your pussy and you can't help but moan out loud. "You're so wet, sweetheart. All from sucking my cock?"
You nod wordlessly from your position on the bed. "Jungkook!" you scream as he plunges two fingers in your pussy. He's ruthless as he fucks his fingers fast and hard, hitting your g-spot right away. "Please," you cry out. You're so wound up and tense and you just want to come already but he won't let you.
You hear Jungkook chuckle from behind you. "Still so tight, baby. Thought Jimin stretched you out already." You're about to reply but you feel his thumb press against your rim and your senses go haywire, mind going blank because you're so overwhelmed.
"Please, please," you beg quietly. You're crying again and you'd do anything at this point to get Jungkook to fuck you. He withdraws his fingers from your holes and you hear the crinkling of plastic behind you. You turn your head slightly to see him slipping a condom on. Jungkook has never fucked you raw and you never asked why because you already know the answer. You'll get hurt hearing the truth anyway.
He holds your hips to steady you. He rubs the head of his cock up and down your folds. "You want this?" he asks roughly.
"Yes. Please."
Finally, finally, Jungkook pushes his cock in your pussy. It doesn't take long because you're so wet he slides right in to the hilt.
"You feel so good around me." He stills for a moment and you grab your ass to spread your cheeks even more.
"Please move, Kook."
You hear him groan. "God, baby, you're filthy." He starts fucking into you and your mind goes blank. You feel his thick cock slide in and out, the tip already kissing your cervix.
"Feels so good," you mumble incoherently. Jungkook fucks you quick and hard, holding your hips so tightly you know it's going to bruise. You feel his balls slap against your clit which adds even more pleasure. You feel yourself getting close again and arch your back.
"Can I please come?" you ask through your moans. "Please let me come, Jungkook. Please—"
"Come," he finally says. It's the only word you need to hear before you let go, that coil in you snapping and bringing pleasure all over your body. You don't know you're moaning so loudly you're almost screaming. You feel your pussy just gush and it gets so wet and sticky you're surprised Jungkook doesn't slip out. It's so filthy that you hear squelching noises as well. Your orgasm goes on for so long you don't know how you're still holding yourself up.
"You creamed my cock so much, baby," Jungkook says. He slows down his pace but he's still moving so you can ride out your high. "Got me wet and even your sheets."
You barely hear him and there's just a buzzing sound around your head. Your body feels so heavy and you just want to collapse but you arch your back even more for Jungkook.
He laughs. "Think I fucked you stupid." He increases his pace again and you just kneel there and take it. "Gonna make me fucking come," he growls as his hips snap against yours. "Fuck." He fucks you some more and you groan every time he hits your g-spot.
Suddenly, he pulls out so fast. "Don't move," he groans. You stay in place and watch him remove the condom off, hand going to stroke his cock as he brings himself to his release. You feel his come on you, right on your pussy and asshole. "Fuck, baby," he groans. You feel even stickier with his load on you. Then he bends down to kiss your neck, and then your cheek, and then a gentle one on your lips.
"You okay?" he asks quietly. His arm goes to wrap around your waist and you slowly start sinking onto the bed.
"Mhm," you mumble and try to keep your emotions at bay. You always feel so overwhelmed after sex with Jungkook. You let a few tears fall down your cheeks but it's the kind of tears of relief from an intense orgasm.
Jungkook presses his front against your back, not caring that his come is still on you. He starts kissing your face again then rubs his nose up and down your throat. "Just breathe, yeah?" he says quietly. You nod weakly against his hold and do just that. The both of you say nothing as you try to calm your racing heart.
You don't know how many minutes pass by until Jungkook stands up. You don't have the strength in you to move your position on the bed or ask where he's going. A few minutes later you feel a wet rag on your back. You let Jungkook clean you up while the both of you still don't say a thing. Then he's moving you on the bed again so your head is on the pillows and he's right behind you, lying down comfortably to be the big spoon. You feel him kissing your head.
"Sleep," he mumbles against your hair. With Jungkook holding you and with his steady breaths guiding yours, you fall asleep right away.
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
You don't know what time it is when you wake up but there's still sunlight peeking through your curtains so you suppose it's still morning. You turn to face the other side of the bed only to find it empty. You don't know what time Jungkook left, if he stayed the night or left the moment you fell asleep. You're used to it already but it doesn't mean you're not hurt. Your heart constricts at the empty space beside you. You move again to lay on your back and cover your face with yours hands, letting out shaky breaths while trying not to breakdown. God, maybe Jimin was right. Just forget about him.
But it's hard not to. It's hard to forget about him when you have sex constantly, when his touches are gentle but also rough. When he wants you to reply to his messages and when he wants you against his body. It's hard because he's friends with your friends. It's hard when he takes care of you after every intense orgasm. It's hard when he makes it seem like he wants you just as much as you want him.
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Jealousy, Jealousy... | Part 3
A/N: don't even have a summary for this. oc is in love with gyu and gyu is in love with another girl but both are virgin losers and gyu is a horndog who would let oc do what she wants to him just as long as he gets to cum.
Word count: 3.3k
Genre: Smut, angst
Warnings: fem!reader, semi-public sex, handjob, orgasm denial, cunnilingus, sub!beomgyu, dom!reader, sub!reader, dom!yeonjun.
A/N: so I have split the chapter into two to get it out faster and to give good time for events to sink in. sorry guys but also not very sorry because i like to torture you lol
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"The girl you've been obsessed with for years has invited you to her party but instead of trying to talk to her, you’re hiding in the closet getting jerked off with her right outside. This is why she never gave you the time of day. You’re such a pervert, Beommie." 
"Yes, baby. Whatever you say." Beomgyu breathes heavily, leaning into your touch. He always becomes so pliant once you have his dick in your hand.
"You've got nothing in your brain but sex, huh?" You ask, jerking him off and true to your words, he already looks so dumbed out.
“No.” He answers your rhetorical question, legs buckling when you drag your palm repeatedly over the head of his cock, precum sticking to your skin.  
“Careful, Beommie. Don’t fall.” You laugh, your breath causing goosebumps to erupt along his neck, and he lays his head back to give you more space, silently asking you to kiss his neck, and you do, hearing him let out the prettiest half-moans half-pants. 
“Can I cum?” 
“Hmm.” You pretend to think about it for a few tortuous seconds, letting one of your hands trail under his shirt to play with his nipples. 
“Baby!” He sputters, his nipples are just so sensitive. 
“You can’t. You’ll make a mess and everyone will know what you did. They’ll all know you came all over yourself like a big pervert.” You choose your words specifically to rile him up, feeling his cock twitch in your hand. 
“I don’t care. Just wanna cum.” 
“But she’ll see, baby. She’s going to be disgusted.” 
“I don’t care. I don’t c-care. Just need it.” He’s delirious, too gone to even think about her. Just the way you like him. You know he’s hanging by a thread and any second now he’s actually going to cum, and so regrettably, you let go of him, causing him to yell out. 
“No!” He cries and you immediately cover his mouth with your hand to quiet him. “Hush, Beomgyu! Someone will hear you.” 
“Why?” He cries out when you remove your hand. 
“I told you. I don’t want you to make a mess. You can cum when we get home.” 
It’s a lie, of course. Truthfully, you just wanted to punish him for once again openly salivating over her in front of you. 
“Then let's go home.” 
“Not yet. I wanna get a few drinks first. I’ll get out of the closet first. You wait a bit and come after me. You should probably wait a bit anyway for that to go down.” You grin, glancing at his poor red cock. 
“You’re evil.” 
“I know.” You put his dick back in his pants and zip them up. “Don’t touch yourself.”
You get out of the closet with a huge smile on your face. This evening started horribly with you having to sit beside Beomgyu and watch him tear through Haeun’s clothes with his gaze, openly lusting after her as if he doesn’t care who sees. But once you had enough alcohol in you, you decided to do something about it and whisper in Beomgyu’s ear to follow you to one of the closets. Being the horndog he is, he followed right after, finally interrupting his leering session. 
Okay, maybe getting him to pay attention to you by giving him a handjob at a party wasn’t your proudest moment but you did get him to stop caring about her. Maybe in time you’ll get him to forget about her completely. Maybe he’ll even start looking at you differently, and he’ll realize you’re the one who truly loves him…Oh, who are you kidding? He has been obsessed with her for–
Lost in your thoughts, you smack right into someone, the drinks they were holding spilling all over the both of you. 
"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, I'm such a drunk idiot." You immediately go into apologizing, not wanting to antagonize the person further, but when you look up, instead of an angry frown greeting you, you see him with his head cocked to the side and a grin on his face. "That’s okay, doll."
“Yeonjun!” You gasp, slightly relieved knowing the person isn’t going to fight you, but still horrified at the damage you’ve done to his white shirt.  “Your shirt is all ruined!"
"It's alright. It’s your dress I’m worried about."
You look down at your dress which was equally soaked and now clinging to your body uncomfortably. “Ah, shit. Let's go wash off before the stains will set." 
You drunkenly drag him to the nearest bathroom. Once you’re inside, you turn to him. "Take off your shirt."
“Oh, is this finally happening?” He wiggles his eyebrows at you and you roll your eyes. “Off.”
"Bossy. I like it." He takes his shirt off and hands it to you, and you bashfully look away from his half-naked body, taking the shirt and running it under water while he grabs a towel and wets it, washing off his stomach, or more accurately–his abs.
Still, you can’t help but to sneak not so subtle glances at him, drawn to the sight, before blushing and looking away when he catches you.
“Like what you see, doll?” He teases, winking at you. 
“Shut up.” You rub his shirt with some soap to get the last of the stain out. 
“I can guarantee you, he doesn’t look like that.” His voice is suddenly so close to you, and you look up to see him right next to you, cornering you between his body and the sink. 
“Stop it.” You put a hand to his chest, which you immediately come to regret as the skin on skin contact makes your treacherous heart flutter. 
“Why? Why are you so hung up on him? The idiot doesn’t even realize how much you love him. He’s too preoccupied with her.” You try to look away at the painful mention of Haeun but Yeonjun gently turns your face back towards him. “Give me a chance to make you forget him.”
“Yeonjun…” 
“Can I?” He leans forward, his face inches from yours. 
Should you really be doing this? Beomgyu had told you to stay away from Yeonjun specifically. He would be very pissed off if he found out that you let him kiss you… but then again, why? Why can’t you kiss Yeonjun? It’s not like you and Beomgyu are together. You’re free to kiss whoever you want, dammit!
‘To hell with it.’ You think, surging forward to close the distance between you and Yeonjun. 
His lips are the softest lips you’ve ever felt. Granted, you only kissed two other boys before, Beomgyu being one of them, but still. He was so confident with it too, guiding you and coaxing you to open up to him, letting him taste you and you him. It was slow, purposeful–so different from Beomgyu’s kisses. 
No. You need to stop thinking about Beomgyu. That was the whole point. Forget Beomgyu. 
“Get off her.” Beomgyu shouts. 
Beomgyu? 
Yeonjun moves away from you, or more accurately is pushed off you. 
“Beomgyu, what are you doing here?” You gasp, horrified at having been caught by him as if you were cheating on him or something. It didn’t help that his reaction made it seem like you are. 
“I was looking for you. I thought I told you to stay away from him.” He hisses, clearly angry which just pisses you off. Whatever fleeting sense of guilt you felt for kissing Yeonjun quickly dissipates in the face of his inexplicable wrath.  
“You don’t get to tell me what to do.” You snap back. “And if I want to kiss Yeonjun, I will.” 
“He’s my friend!” He shrieks, as if that means something.
“So? That doesn’t mean I can’t like him.” 
Beomgyu reels at that. “You like him?” 
Both boys stare at you expectantly, waiting for your answer, and you stammer under their gaze. “M-maybe I do.” 
Beomgyu’s face hardens and he turns his back on you and walks out the door without another word. 
What? What did you say? 
“Oh no, did I just fuck up?” You fret, moving to run after him, but Yeonjun grabs your hand, stopping you. “No. You stood up for yourself. If he doesn’t want to be with you then he doesn’t get to tell you who you can be with.” 
“You’re right. He’s not my boyfriend.” You try to assert, but quickly lose your confidence. “And now he will never be. He just saw me kissing his friend! That’s like incest!”
Yeonjun bursts out laughing at that. “What? That’s ridiculous. Do you even hear yourself?” 
You want to be mad at him for trivializing how you feel. This is serious! You may have just lost your chance with Beomgyu! This is no laughing matter!
So then why are you laughing like he’s just cracked the funniest joke you’ve ever heard? “Oh my god, you’re right. What am I even thinking? This is stupid.” You huff out between cackles, “I’m so stupid.” 
Yeonjun stops laughing first, gathering you in his arms and waiting for you to calm down. “You’re not stupid. You’re in love.” 
“Yeah.” You confirm, bitterly. 
“And he’s an ungrateful idiot.” 
“Maybe.” You fiddle with your fingers. “But if there is a one percent chance I can be with him, I don’t want to ruin it by having him think I’m fucking his best friend.” 
Yeonjun sighs, stepping back. “Fine, go to him. Explain what happened to him. But for the record, I think you’re making a huge mistake.” 
“I know.” 
______________________________
You scour the party looking for Beomgyu, but you can’t find him anywhere. Did he leave already? Is he that mad? 
You lament your poor choices as you open up another door, stumbling across yet another couple engaged in less than savory activities with the woman spread out on the edge of the bed and the man with his face buried between her legs. 
“Whoops, sorry!” You yelp, knee-jerk reaction to slam the door shut suddenly halted when the man kneeling on the floor turns towards you and you see an all too familiar face. 
Beomgyu?! 
They both stare at you, Haeun with her dress pushed up and Beomgyu with his lips glistening with something you don’t want to think about. He makes eye contact with you before he turns around and presses his face back between her legs. 
That fucking slut. 
You slam the door shut and storm off with another target in mind. When you spot the colorful haired man, you drag him behind you to one of the empty bedrooms you saw earlier. 
"Hey, what’s going on--" You cut Yeonjun off with a kiss which he doesn’t resist much, making use of the unexpected opportunity. But when you separate, he takes the chance to ask, "What happened to Beomgyu?"
"Fuck him. I want you.” You kiss him again, suddenly nervous about what you’re going to ask now that you’re right in front of him. Still, you push through, murmuring against his lips, eyes sealed shut, "Want you to eat me out."
Unfortunately, Yeonjun doesn’t immediately give in as you had been praying he would, and he pulls back to ask you, "Are you sure?"
"Yes." You answer, still refusing to open your eyes. But the asshole won’t accept that. 
“Look at me, doll.” He demands, cupping your face in his hands. You take a deep breath before opening them, looking him dead in the eyes. “I want it.” 
"It just seems–"
"Do it, Yeonjun!" You snap then immediately regret it, feeling mortified at the possible rejection. God, you didn’t think this through, did you? Just because he wanted to kiss you, doesn’t mean he wants to eat you out in the middle of a party. He’s not Beomgyu. "Unless you don't want to."
Yeonjun lifts you up and drops you on the bed, the breath whooshing out of you as you make impact with the mattress. You don’t even get the chance to ask him what the hell he’s doing before he spreads your legs and gets between them. "It's my pleasure, doll."
He starts by licking over your panties, and you’re so glad he is easing you through it because even that makes you tingle. His tongue moves up and down your slit in slow, deliberate strokes, turning you on until you’re not sure if your panties are soaked because of your arousal or his saliva. And once it’s completely see-through, he hooks his finger under it, pulling it to the side. 
The first direct touch of his hot tongue against your sensitive pussy has you jolting, your hands shooting out to grab at the sheets. But Yeonjun pulls away for a second, grabbing your hands and putting them on his head.
"You can hold onto my hair, doll." He grins, looking devastatingly handsome, “Pull on it when I do something you like.” 
That’s a dangerous ask because you’re pulling his hair as soon as he puts his mouth on you again. Not that he minds, you can see his smirk as he stares up at you, tongue teasingly swirling around your swollen clit. 
“Don’t tease.” You whimper, holding onto his hair tightly. 
“Why not? You’ve teased me long enough, pretty girl.” He purrs, pressing soft kisses against your pussy while his thumb rubs maddeningly around your entrance. 
“Yeonjun…” You whine, taking your hands away and trying to close your legs, but he pins your legs back down before returning your hands to his hair. “Keep your hands on me. I like it.” 
“Pull my hair harder. I like it when you’re rough with me."
Beomgyu’s words ricochet inside your skull, tearing up your brain. No. Don’t think about him. He’s in another room with another woman, probably fucking her by now. Focus on the man who actually wants you. 
“Did I lose you?” Yeonjun’s voice cuts through your tortured monologue. 
You look at him, embarrassed at having been caught. 
“Then let me make you forget about him.” He vows, wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking on it, making your brain short-circuit. 
“That’s it, doll. Just focus on me.” He flicks his tongue from side to side, causing electricity to shoot up to your belly. 
“Oh god, Yeonjun!” You gasp, pulling at his hair, which just makes him do it with more fervor, alternating between rapid flicks and long languid licks up the entire length of your pussy. You’d be embarrassed by how quickly he builds up your high, if he didn’t look like he was enjoying it so much, moaning into your pussy and staring up at you as if he wants to eat you whole. 
“Feels good?” He smirks, fingers finally breaching your empty pussy. 
“Yes, yes!” You groan, head thrown back as he pumps his fingers inside you, his full lips latching onto your clit once more. 
The feeling of his fingers filling you up, fucking you open, and the unrelenting attack on your clit from his mouth has you teetering on the edge in no time. But then an unwelcome image pops into your brain–Beomgyu with his messy hair and his lips swollen and glistening with arousal–and suddenly it wasn’t Yeonjun between your legs and it wasn’t Haeun Beomgyu was eating out…
No, it was you on the bed and Beomgyu between your legs, looking up at you with his big, brown eyes that seemed to beg you to cum, and you do. You have to bite down on your tongue to stop from screaming his name as you shudder and whine, thighs clamping around Yeonjun’s head. 
Yeonjun. 
You jerk up, orgasm still not quite passed, and blink the haziness away. God, you’re disgusting. 
But Yeonjun has no idea what is going through your head. He has a big smile on his face, proud of himself for making you lose it so easily. 
“You liked that, doll?” He climbs up your body to kiss you, and you hesitantly reciprocate, not wanting him to sense that anything is wrong. But when he starts getting handsy again and you feel his hard cock pressing against you, you quickly push him away. 
"Wait. I can't–I'm sorry.” You stammer nervously. 
“Oh. Are you okay?” 
“Yeah, I just…” Whatever lie you were thinking of dies on your tongue when you make eye contact with him. You can’t lie to him. “I just need to go home."
“Of course.” He backs away, but you can see the disappointment on his face. “Is it… because of Beomgyu?” 
You don’t reply, but that is all the answer he needed.
___________________________________
Still, he is gentleman enough to take you home. 
“You didn’t have to do this, you know.” You tell him for the tenth time, feeling guilty after basically rejecting him. 
“I know. I wanted to.” He reassures you once again, no hint of annoyance in his voice. “I know Beomgyu usually takes you home, but since he’s… occupied, I didn’t want you to walk home alone.”
“Right.” You mumble, staring at the ground as that painful image of Beomgyu between Haeun’s legs flashes in your mind. “Well, thank you… and I’m sorry. I just don’t think I’m ready yet.” 
“Hey,” He walks towards you, propping your chin up with his finger. “You don’t have to apologize. You don’t owe me anything.” 
“I know. I just wish things were different. I wish I wasn’t so pathetically in love with him that it feels wrong to even be with someone else. Which is stupid, I know. Beomgyu and I aren’t–” Your phone rings for the 10th time since you left the party, cutting you off, and you glare at the name flashing on the screen. 
“Beomgyu again?” 
“Yes.” You roll your eyes, silencing it. 
“Answer it.”
You stare at him as if he grew a second head, and he rolls his eyes. “He’s probably worried about you. We left without saying a word to him.” 
Damn it. You guess he’s right. You didn’t even think of that. 
"Hello?" You press the phone to your ear but quickly move it away slightly at the immediate shouting coming from it. 
"Where the fuck are you?" 
"Home." You answer unenthusiastically, which just pisses Beomgyu off more. "You went home by yourself?"
"No, Yeonjun took me home." You elaborate nervously, scared of how he’s going to react, and boy, does he not disappoint. "Well this is just fucking great. I've been looking all over for you, freaked out of my mind that something happened to you and you're back home fucking my friend."
His words reignite your anger all over again. “I didn’t think you’d come up from between her legs long enough to notice.” 
“So you’re getting back at me by fucking him?”
“I didn’t–you know what, Beomgyu. I can't deal with this right now. I'm going to bed."
"I’m not done–" You hang up on him, too exhausted to think about what any of this means. 
"He's not happy, huh?"
"Nope." You sigh. What a fucking terrible night. 
"I don't get him. If he's jealous, why doesn't he just ask you out?"
"He's not jealous. He's just–” Just what? Why is he even acting that way? What is he so angry about? Because you’re ‘fucking’ his friend? So what? “I don't know. It's complicated. We've been messing around and I guess he got annoyed when he saw us kissing."
“Well, are you guys dating?” Yeonjun asks and you almost laugh. “No. Nothing like that. Just… just messing around.”
"Then he has no right to be annoyed." He states simply, and he’s right. He doesn’t, and you can’t make sense of why he is so all you manage is to lamely mumble, "Well, he's protective of me."
To which Yeonjun snorts, "You mean possessive."
Is he? Why would he be? Is it because he is not used to you having a boyfriend before? Not that Yeonjun is your boyfriend.   
"My brain hurts. I need to sleep." You groan, pulling at your hair in frustration before your hands fall to your sides with a slap. “I’m sorry, Yeonjun.” 
“Don’t be.” He reassures you, “I’ll be here when that idiot inevitably does something to completely push you away.”
________________________________
A/N: as always I always love to hear feedback even if it's just how much you'd like to punch gyu lmao. currently i don't know how many parts the remaining plot will be divided into so it could be 2 or 3 more similar sized chapters to this.
just for fun, i'll do a poll every chapter to see if people change their minds on who they want oc to end up with. but i've already decided on what to do so the votes are just for fun
Taglist: @wonwooz1@yaorzu-blog@allylikesdabee@rkivezzs@malieno @leviathanlee26 @yomomas-stuff @kurisaiyunobara @girlwholovekpop @zuzuhasablog @viaaasdiary @ho3forkpop @skzvcr
904 notes · View notes
haechwrites · 1 year
Text
sugar, butter, & the royal crown - L.DH
prince!lee donghyuck x baker fem!OC (no name!)
synopsis: prince donghyuck only has one princess on his mind, but she's not actually a princess. she's just the royal baker's granddaughter.
wc: ~17.1k
warnings: pet names used only so i don't have to namedrop lol. no other warnings tho!
A/N: this is my second longest fic i've actually finished hehe i'm really happy with this one and now i wish i had a prince haechan lol
-- some things to note first:
THIS FIC IS WRITTEN IN FIRST PERSON. if you see ♔, that means it's in haechan's pov written in third person!
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
As a child, life is all about the simple pleasures. It didn’t matter that I’d come home to a dark house carrying the faint snores of my mother. I was still reeling from the sweet taste of mangoes on my tongue, the slight dusting of sugar in my hair, and the lingering soreness from laughing in my cheeks. I’d quickly wash up, give my mom a quick peck on the forehead, and tuck myself in bed. Before I know it, the sun greets me again and I meet my grandma outside as she leads me to the palace. This was my routine and for my young brain, there was nothing ever wrong with it.
My grandma is the head baker at the palace. Since the separation of my parents, I have spent my days with my grandma at work. It was all I knew and I was content with it. Every sunrise, I’d have 30 minutes before I had to meet her outside. Together, we’d walk to the palace’s servant entrance and my grandma would give our favorite guard, Doyun, a warm smile and a promise to slip an extra pastry in his meal for letting me tag along. I’d walk past him with a finger to my lips asking him to be sworn to secrecy. He’d always return it with a wink and a small laugh. It was our little promise, though I’m sure no one would actually mind an extra guest on the grounds – especially a mere 7-year-old. 
Once inside the kitchen, I strap on the apron that the palace’s tailor secretly made specifically for me. Grandma told me that the busiest times in the kitchen were the mornings, so I always sit in the corner to let her start the day. I occupy myself for at least an hour before my friend comes to play with me. His entrance is always the same: a secret knock on the side door and a gleaming smile when I open it for him. 
Today he’s dressed up in a super fancy garment, almost like a uniform. I had never seen him in anything other than his casual button-up and pants, typically covered by an extra adult-sized apron we’d find laying around.
“Donghyuck! What are you wearing?”
“Princess!,” He’d squeal, pulling me into a tight hug. “It’s my special outfit.”
“Is it your birthday?” My nose scrunches in confusion, looking him up and down. Even if it was his birthday, I can’t imagine his servant parents could afford such expensive fabric. 
Donghyuck laughs before yanking a spare apron off its hook and pulling it over his head. 
“Nooo. I have something important to do today. That’s why I’m wearing this,” He explains, looking a little nervous.
“Oh wow. You look like the King. Or like a prince,” I say jokingly, but Donghyuck freezes. His eyes are wide like the time he accidentally ate the last mango tart I was saving.
Then he breaks out into an awkward laugh and smiles wide at me, “I am a prince… because you’re my princess.” He says with utmost confidence, before grabbing my hands. We’re standing the way I position my two play dolls during a pretend wedding ceremony.
I quickly turn the shade of freshly baked cherry pies and I tear my hands out of his hold.
“Donghyuck-ah! How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that?” I huff, crossing my arms. 
He snickers, “Hmmm… maybe one hundred more times.”
“One hundred more times?!”
“Yes, if you can even count that high,” he smirks, instantly easing the tension from earlier. He plops down onto my stool and looks up at me. “So what are we playing today? Or should we read? Or does Baker Grandma need help?”
I aimlessly kick the leg of the stool, thinking about what we could do today as I can see him anxiously bounce around in his seat. He looks like he’s running on limited time today. Sometimes Donghyuck disappears on me in the middle of our hangouts or doesn’t show up at all. I just assume his parents need help with their tasks just like how Grandma often calls me to help her bake. He’s never told me where in the palace they work despite the years we’ve been hanging out. 
“What if we help your parents today?” The minute the question leaves my lips, I hear a snort from the kitchen staff and Donghyuck goes into a coughing fit as if the flour seeped into his lungs.
I begin to feel myself turn red again and wondering what was so wrong till I feel a familiar warm hand on my shoulder.
“Ah Donghyuck, you’re here today?” My grandma looks at his attire with a suspicious gaze. “Don’t you have somewhere else to be?” Her hands are on her hips and it feels similar to the times she’s caught me using the oven on my own.
Donghyuck starts shyly giggling while fiddling with the oversized apron my grandma is reaching to remove. I stand there in confusion as he looks like a puppy that was told he wasn’t allowed to play or have a treat. I want to help him but the look on grandma’s face is too scary to fight.
She’s slowly ushering him out the door and I’m holding his apron in my hands, watching him pout.
“Bye Hyuck,” I mutter, sad that our day was cut short before it even began. This was the quickest that one has ended.
“Byeee Princess,” He says with as much despair in his voice. He always has to be a little more dramatic than me. I giggle and wave him goodbye, spirits lifted by his antics. I see a smile grow on his face at the sound of my laugh before my grandma closes the door.
My loneliness returns as I stare at the wooden panels of the side door. 
“Did he have to go?” I ask, slumping back onto the stool he was just on.
My grandma turns to me with a quizzical look. I can’t tell if she’s angry, sad, or disappointed and then she’s crouched down in front of me. Her flour-coated hands are resting on my lap.
“Donghyuck got called by his parents. They’re very important people,” She starts slowly. Grandma has never talked about Donghyuck’s family or personal life before. It was never brought up in the past because I assumed he was just like me. Now that we’re finally beginning to talk about it, the hesitant look on her face makes me not want to know anymore. 
“Guards?,” I ask. To me, Doyun is the most important worker in the castle as he freely lets me in and out. Maybe guards earn enough to adorn such fancy clothes I saw Donghyuck wear.
“No, honey,” She glances back at her staff, and I notice they’ve been watching. They give me a reassuring smile, but there’s uneasiness quivering on their lips.
“Donghyuck… Donghyuck is the Prince.”
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
They found him. Donghyuck’s personal guards find him where they usually do when he escapes his tasks, and that would be at the palace kitchen. This time, they find him outside the door, rather than inside scarfing down mango tarts. 
Without any hesitation and with no room for him to trick them and run, they grab the tiny prince and bring him to the meeting he was meant to attend with the King. It was meant to be the first glimpse of his life as a future ruler, attending meetings with fellow diplomats and other boring princely things. Donghyuck does not understand why he can’t spend his day playing like a regular 7-year-old with his pretty friend from the kitchen. 
Despite having complained and whined his way out of most duties, Donghyuck had reached the level of maturity to know that this one he couldn’t fight. I mean, the tailor adjusted his royal attire just for this one-hour meeting. After having come to terms with sitting in boredom for an hour, Donghyuck did not expect to be dragged into more as he was about to skip his way over to the kitchen once the diplomats left.
“And where are you off to now, Donghyuck?”
He freezes in his tracks and a shiver ripples down his spine at the sound of her voice. He’s been caught again.
He spins around, plastering the biggest smile possible on his face. “Nowhere, Mother. Just strolling around until my tutoring session.” He hopes she doesn’t recognize this path to the kitchen.
“And is your tutoring session located in the kitchen today?” She asks, words dripping with a patronizing attitude. Nothing Donghyuck isn’t used to.
“Oh! I wanted to see if I could get a quick snack before. My brain needs food, right?” He hides his crossed fingers behind his back, praying she doesn’t call his bluff.
“And you’re not just going there to see that girl, are you?” She takes a step closer and Donghyuck is scared she can see the drip of sweat beginning to trickle down his forehead. How did she know about Princess? He wonders if his guard ratted him out… even after Donghyuck gave him half of his tart. The betrayal, he scoffs. 
“There’s no girl, Mother.” Donghyuck decides it's best to deny it and stare straight at his feet. 
“You are correct, there will never be a girl. Instead, there will be a future queen. A princess for now and you need to begin meeting our potential suitresses,” The queen firmly states, grabbing his shoulders to steer him towards the library. Before he could stop himself, his chest bubbles with heat, and his brain is fogged with confusion. He can’t imagine anyone by his side but her.
“Why can’t she be my princess?”
The words spill out from his royal lips before he could catch them. There’s no missing the instant look of rage and disgust on the Queen’s face when her son’s true desires are revealed. Desires of the heart, but a complete disgrace to his duties as the Prince. Her eyes grow colder and her skin pales till her blush is the brightest hue on her cheeks. 
Donghyuck feels his throat go dry and the crossed fingers behind his back unlock. No luck can help him now.
“No more kitchen visits, Prince Donghyuck.”
The queen’s words are final. His shoulders slump lower and his feet are heavy as he drags them across the cobblestone trailing toward the library. It feels like there was a wall that slammed into the ground behind him, forbidding him from seeing her again.
“Yes, ma’am. No more.”
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
^ FIFTEEN YEARS LATER ^
The only memory of my childhood that lingered was the heat of the oven. Like I did every day at the age of 7, I continued to bake to keep that fire alive. There were days where the warmth was cooler than normal and my urge to bake waivered. Days like when my grandma stopped showing up outside my house every day a half hour after sunrise. Days like when my mother decided I was too much to raise when I stopped spending my time at the palace. And days like the one when I moved out of the city to live with my dad. 
However, there were also days where the flame was ablaze. Days like when I got my own personal baking set. Days like when I got accepted into a baking school. And days like today, where I return to the city that pushed me out fifteen years ago to open a bakery. Despite the dismal circumstances of the day I left, I always felt the urge to return. It never felt right that I moved in the first place. Confusion still envelops my mind when I think about how my grandma stopped taking me to the palace for unsaid reasons and how my mother was incapable of taking care of me due to it. There had to be something more going on. 
Outside of this mystery of my childhood, my main goal was to return with my own bakery specializing in my soon-to-be infamous mango tarts. I had visited the city for the first time since my move before to scope out bakery locations. But today was the day that I officially move in, to both my home and bakery, and kickstart my business. My first task was to put up a sign displaying the bakery’s name.
“Oh my goodness… so it is true!”
Warmth blooms in my chest; I would recognize that voice anywhere. I flip around and I’m greeted with her same sugary sweet smile. My grandma looks just as she did before but her hair is dusted white like the flour she worked with. But she still smelled like spiced apple pie, my eyes watered in disbelief. 
“Grandma!” I ran into her open arms and I could feel her chuckle. 
“Oh honey, it’s been much too long. Look at you now… a beautiful woman before my eyes,” She’s smiling widely and I can see her eyes take in my features. Fifteen years worth of change and growth. 
“I’m sorry we haven’t been in contact much. I could barely find the time to tell you I was coming back.”
“It’s alright. All that matters is you’re here,” Grandma rubs my arms reassuringly. “And are you here alone? Or have you moved back with a lover?” The childish gleam on her face makes me giggle and I quickly correct her that I’m single and focusing on my baking.
“Ah, I see. In that case, you must have more time than I anticipated. You must come with me to work one of these days. Just like old times. Consider it research for your bakery.” The way she sways with excitement makes it hard for me to turn it down, and I can’t deny the flutter in my heart at the idea of stepping foot onto the palace grounds again. It was where it all started for me. I agreed with a smile.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
After a week of prepping the bakery, I decided to visit my grandma. To be completely honest, outside of the work I had to do, my nerves did play a role in keeping me from going earlier. But now that I’ve decided I’ve run out of excuses, I’m walking to the servant entrance of the palace a little before noon to give my grandmother the morning to solely focus on work. It makes me smile knowing I still remember the schedule of the palace kitchen. 
The streets surrounding the castle are quiet at this hour. I can still remember the hustle and commotion of the staff in the early morning, lining up to get inside to start their days. It was never daunting to be a young girl surrounded by a diverse array of people. It was thrilling and almost comforting and it was much better than staying home alone. 
When I reach the gates, I feel like I’ve traveled back in time because blocking my path is a young guard who looks eerily like Doyun, the guard I knew from before.
“How can I help you, miss?”
“Hi.” I’m inspecting his face. He has the same colored hair, but it’s parted differently. He has the same warm light brown eyes and his face is a little softer than Doyun’s. My mind can’t help but ask, “I’m sorry if this is a strange question but do you know Guard Doyun?”
His stiff demeanor drops like a curtain and the young guard’s eyes light up, “I’m his son, Yunseo! How do you know my father?” Suddenly I don’t see a guard in uniform, but instead a bright, inviting individual in his place.
“No wonder! I’m the granddaughter of the head baker. I used to greet your father every morning when I was a child.” 
“Oh yes! Yes, she told me you were coming. You can go right along in, just make sure she knows to sneak me an extra sweet treat.” He opens the gates for me.
“Ah like father, like son,” I giggle, slightly bowing to him as I enter.
“Do you remember how to get to the kitchen?”
I stare at the familiar worn cobblestone paths and nod, “I think so.”
The walk to the kitchen is shorter than I remember but the smell wafting from the windows is all the same. I reach the side door and I’m about to knock when I notice it’s creaked slightly open. I hear a voice above all the kitchen noise.
“Gran, please sneak something in my food today so I can get sick and stay in bed for the whole week. I do not want to court these women.” I peek my head in further to take a look at the man speaking. I let out a soft gasp when my eyes land on him.
Outside of his stunning beauty, he looks familiar. His tufts of chestnut brown hair are slightly waved as they curl around the nape of his neck. He often shakes his head to get the bangs out of his face, exposing his tan skin. If I look close enough, he has distinguishable moles on the plush curves of his cheeks. His rosy lips are wrapped around a piece of pastry and even when he’s talking with his mouth full, he’s still attractive. My eyes instantly widen when I notice his outfit: the royal attire.
A squeal escapes my mouth and before I could hide, the door is swung open by my grandma.
“You’re here!”
At the announcement of my arrival, the young man is dusting the crumbs off his hands, and looks like he’s about to make a quick escape. 
“Hi Grandma,” I give her a hug, not minding the flour sticking to my sweater. “I was just about to knock.” I let out a small laugh to hide the fact that I was definitely eavesdropping not moments ago.
“Grandma?” I hear the man say behind her. He decided to stay after realizing it wasn’t one of his guards coming to get him, but instead a pretty woman. An oddly, familiar, pretty woman. 
My grandma bites her lip to keep from smiling any bigger and she grabs my arm to present me to the man.
“Oh my. I forgot you guys know each other! It’s Donghyuck, do you remember, honey? You used to play with him every day as I worked.” The glint in her eyes is something more than just happy nostalgia and I give her a look.
“Pri-... Princess?” When the old nickname leaves his lips, I gasp and feel my cheeks bloom pink. The layers of the handsome man in front of me started to peel and I could see the little boy I spent my early life with. Most of my warmest days were spent with him. But I’m also brought back to one of the colder days of my childhood. The day I found out my childhood best friend was the Prince. 
At first, I didn’t understand why my grandma was so fearful of telling me who he really was. I was ecstatic to hear that Donghyuck was royalty. I was fascinated and curious to see what his life was like and how it compared to being the granddaughter of a palace worker. I soon learned that what I wanted to discover was not so glamorous. Because apparently, his life excluded me. I didn’t piece that together until a few years after my move. Why else did Donghyuck stop showing up and why else was I forbade from going to the palace with my grandma? When I came to the realization, I began to resent him and eventually, completely forgot about him.
“Prince Donghyuck,” I bowed, trying not to show any expression. He had his arm slightly raised like he was about to reach for me but his body stiffened at my curtness. My grandma even looks at me with confusion. “It’s… It’s nice to see you again.”
“Oh, there’s no need to be so polite. You guys were friends!” My grandma squeezes my arms, urging me to get closer. I stay in my place.
“He’s the Prince, Grandma,” I whisper through my teeth and I can tell he hears me by the dejected look on his face. I can’t get myself to look him in the eyes.
“It’s quite alright. I actually have to get going. Prin-... Sorry, It was lovely to see you,” The Prince ducks his head and leaves the way I came in. He looks back at my figure once more, thoughts churning, before he disappears.
My feet remain still and I’m staring at the place he stood. Staring at the pastry he bit into. He’s real and he’s back. And the door he walked through was the same one he used to leave me 15 years ago. The alarms rang in my brain and I quickly shook my head, grabbing a bowl and mixing whatever contents are in it. The faster I stirred, the more I begged my mind to stop thinking about Donghyuck.
“You’re overwhipping the cream.”
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
On every page he turned to, the words blurred and all Donghyuck could see was her. She was more beautiful than he remembered. She’s much taller now, and he naturally smiles remembering when she used to argue that he was only taller than her by a centimeter. Her hair was also longer and not bound in her classic two braids. Though he didn’t get to see her smile, he was sure that it’s brighter than before. After all, everything about her seemed to have grown more beautiful than before. Donghyuck wonders if he should be calling her “Queen” now with how wonderfully she’s aged. 
A delicate tap on his shoulder forces Donghyuck out of his lovestruck haze. “Prince Donghyuck, are you enjoying your book?”
He remembers that he’s in the library with one of his potential suitresses. He turns to her and almost wants to laugh. For the years that his childhood friend has been gone, it was the memory of her that invaded his mind whenever he was forced to go on these dates. But now that Donghyuck has seen her again in the flesh, he realizes how doomed he is and how these other princesses definitely don’t stand a chance.
During the fifteen years apart, Donghyuck’s gloom exacerbated the Queen’s determination to find him a future queen. Out of all his regular royal responsibilities, his courtships took the most time. He excels in all areas of his duties, but the one he can’t manage to succeed in is getting a wife. From playdates to formal dates, Donghyuck aged and remained single. And both he and the head baker knew why. 
Despite the Queen’s warnings to never enter the kitchen, Donghyuck found himself there every week whether it was to steal extra mango tarts or ask about the baker’s granddaughter. It was usually after failed dates when he’d trudge into the kitchen, completely drained of energy, and beg the baker to talk to him about his first love. Questions about where she is, how she’s doing, and whether she thinks of him spill from his mouth, and the baker would entertain him every time. Even if he only knew and could only remember the child version of her, Donghyuck still managed to compare her to every suitress he met. None of them stood a chance against his princess. And though with time he could recognize how silly this infatuation had gotten, he grew fatigued of courtship and this was the easiest way to go about it. The grandmother was wary of this long overrun connection as well, but at the same time commended him for his commitment to her granddaughter. She also didn’t have the heart to tell him to move on.
And now Donghyuck’s here, on another date and he actually has an image, a real person, to be thinking of. 
“I’m sorry. I don’t think this is going to work out.”
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
“So you are hiding from me?”
“Oh Jesus Christ,” I drop the bowl of frosting at my feet and scramble to pick it up. A pair of far too expensive shoes enter my vision. I shoot up and my heart races, knowing exactly who it is.
“My prince,” I bow, meeting the ground once more. I stand upright and give him a passing smile.
“I like hearing you say that,” The Prince smirks. He swiftly scoops a finger of frosting before popping it in his mouth.
“Formalities,” I respond and I move the bowl out of his reach.
He chuckles and he starts to fiddle with an apron left on the counter.
“So you’ve been visiting at nighttime. Are you actually avoiding me?” He looks at me like he’s challenging me to say no. 
Yes. “No, I just prefer the kitchen at night.” I clutch the frosting bowl tighter and focus my attention on what’s salvageable.
“You mean my kitchen… which you’ve been sneaking into with the help of my guard.” I can feel that he’s moved closer and I wince.
“Yes… I’m sorry. My grandma said it’d be okay and my kitchen at the bakery isn’t finished being built. If you’d like me to stop coming, I can.” I start to untie my apron and his hand catches my wrist.
“No,” He blurts out. “There’s no need. Feel free to use the kitchen.” The Prince raises his hands in the air as if to give me permission. I politely nod and go back to fixing my frosting, ignoring the tingling I feel on my wrist. 
He doesn’t make a move to leave. Instead, he puts on the apron from the counter and leans in to watch.
“Um, what are you doing?” The Prince is tapping the table and humming as he stares at me.
“Hanging out,” He says matter-of-factly. 
“I see,” And that’s all that I can say because who am I to kick the Prince out of his own kitchen? So I just mix and continue doing my thing.
“Just like the old days. You do remember, right?” I make the mistake of looking up and meeting his eyes. He’s looking at me like his question meant more than just a test of my memory.
“Vaguely… It was a long, long time ago.” A time I don’t wish to relive.
There’s a short pause before The Prince replies.
“Well, I remember. I think I’ll always remember. You were my best friend… And those were probably the best days of my life.” He doesn’t look at me when he says this. In fact, he looks nervous to be admitting it in the first place. 
All I can do is nod, not knowing what to say to his confession. Especially when the feeling I get when I look back on those times is not as positive.
“Anyway… I’m planning on recreating those times.” Without thinking, I meet his eyes and he’s smiling hopefully. “So don’t try to hide from me next time. I’ll be here whenever you are. Think of it as your payment for using the kitchen.” 
The uneasiness and warmth in my stomach are hard to decipher. The thought of spending more time with him is thrilling and terrifying at the same time. I try to ease my nerves by mixing even harder and he notices before laughing. 
With my unspoken agreement, we spend the rest of the night in silence, just in each other’s presence. Every now and then he steals a bite of my makings and tries to lighten the air with a poorly made joke. And I don’t hold my laughter back.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
“And then, once the frosting is on, you can add the strawberries.” I demonstrate by putting the nicely sliced strawberries on in a thin layer. 
“When are you going to teach me how to make the mango tart?” The Prince pouts and bites the strawberries instead of putting them on the cake. I scowl and move the bowl away from him. 
“When are you going to stop eating my ingredients?”
He smirks and taps the counter, “When are you going to stop using my kitchen?” He tilts his head to the side to goad me.
I roll my lips into my mouth and stuff another strawberry in his face when he laughs. 
“Eat up,” I say sickeningly sweet.
Completely out of my control, my hangouts with Prince Donghyuck have returned. However, this time, I know he’s the prince and instead of every day in the morning, it’s 2 to 3 times a week at night. My excuse is that my kitchen in the bakery isn’t done being built, but to be completely honest, I could have it done by the end of the week. Maybe it’s because I enjoy my time with the Prince or maybe it’s because I actually do want the extra amenities I asked to be installed last minute… who knows? The end conclusion is that I find myself in the palace’s kitchen more often than I intended, and I find myself enjoying the Prince’s company more than I intended.
“Okay, your highness. Do you think you can stack these layers evenly?” 
He gives me a playful salute, mouth full of cream, as he hops off the kitchen counter. He stands by my side and takes the cake from my hands.
“You know… as much as I like hearing you call me ‘your highness,’ why don’t you ever call me by my name anymore?” 
“Because now I know you’re the Prince.” And I don’t know how it feels to have your name roll off my tongue as it did before, I think to myself.
The Prince lets out a low whistle. “Do you see me differently?” He trains his eyes to the level of the cake to get it precisely right. I watch him from above.
“It’s been fifteen years… so yes, I do see you differently.” I move to mix more frosting to coat the cake with.
“Okay,” He nods, thinking about my response. “So me being the Prince isn’t part of it?” He glances at me quickly with what I can assume is worry before he goes to add another layer of cake.
“Mmm… It is. Not a big part, but definitely a part. I think it’s mainly because you’ve grown up, We’ve both grown up. Maybe me more than you,” I tease. He sticks his tongue out at me and I make a face back. “Example number one.”
He finishes putting on the last layer and stands up straight to admire his work.
“What makes me different than before?” He takes the frosting bowl from my hands and begins icing the cake like I’ve taught him a couple of days ago. I take this as a break and I lift myself up to sit on the counter, dangling my feet.
“You’re taller than me, for one,” he gasps in fake shock and I hit him on the shoulder. 
“You’re dressed nicer.”
“That’s not a compliment for me, that’s a compliment for my stylist,” He corrects me.
“True, okay. You’re smarter than before, I can see you’re not skipping your tutoring sessions. And… you’re not as cute.”
At that, he perks up, frosting is long forgotten. “What do you mean I’m not as cute?” And with the face he’s making, I almost take back my words.
“Well, your highness, you were a boy before. Of course, you’re not cute now. You’re a man.” I roll my eyes as if that were the most obvious thing.
“If I’m not cute, then what am I?” He squints at me and I can tell I’ve fallen into a trap.
“You’re… You’re handsome. Now,” I mutter out. I quickly clear my throat and point to a bald spot on the cake. “Hey, you missed a spot.”
Without even looking at him, I know he’s smiling. “You think I’m handsome.”
“Alright,” I drag out the word. “You’re the Prince. Aren’t you supposed to be handsome so you can woo and marry a pretty princess?”
“Not exactly. Being ridiculously handsome isn’t a royal requirement.”
I let out a scoff, “When did I say ‘ridiculously handsome’?”
“You didn’t have to, I see it on your face.” He taps my cheek and I suddenly notice how close our faces have gotten. Before I know it, my face is blooming pink again and I can feel the warmth shoot from my head to the rest of my body. I launch myself back and adjust my apron. And he stares at me like he’s won.
“Okay, your turn. What’s different about me?” I look around the kitchen to get my heart to settle down. What is happening?
The Prince doesn’t hesitate. “Well, you’re just as beautiful as you were before. Maybe even more.”
I gasp at his words and look him in the eyes. There’s no hint of his typical teasing attitude; he looks completely genuine. My mind goes blank and my ability to respond is rendered useless. He seems to notice that so he brushes off his comment quickly, thinking he’s overstepped.
“Anyways, since we’ve discovered that the only thing that makes me different from before is that I’m exceptionally more handsome-”
“Didn’t say that.”
“-Then why don’t you just call me ‘Donghyuck.’ Like you did before.”
Maybe it’s because he called me beautiful. Maybe it’s because I like the idea of exclusively calling him ‘Donghyuck.’ Or maybe I’m excited to eat the cake we just made, but my heart is fluttering quicker than it ever has.
“Okay. Donghyuck.”
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
“FIRE! DONGHYUCK! FIRE, FIRE!”
“OH SHIT!”
Watching the medium sized fire bursting from the top of the pot, I run to the fire extinguisher. I’m scrambling to grab it, swift to squeeze the white dust all over the burning stove, despite the dough covering my hands. I hear Donghyuck’s screams in the back and he’s grabbing my shoulders to hide. Once I see the last flame get coated, I drop the extinguisher on the ground, exhausted.
I feel his hands digging into my shoulder blades and I grab him by the jacket, turning him to face me. Knowing how to cover his ass, he smiles in shame, rubbing my arm.
“I swear I was watching the stove,” He whips out his baby voice and try my best not to smack the side of his head. He’s the Prince. He’s the Prince. He’s the Prince, I repeat to myself. 
“Your looks distracted me.” I slap him anyways.
He groans in pain, even though I could’ve slapped harder and I cross my arms to look as threatening as possible. 
“You burnt the caramel,” I whine, staring at the black tar in my brand new pot. “And my pot!”
He immediately attacks me with a hug, shaking me around, mumbling apologies. “I’ll buy you a new one, I promise! I’ll buy you three! Four? Seven!”
“Make it eight,” I huff, tearing his arms off me, only to weirdly miss them.
He gasps, hands against his head in shock. “You definitely dressed prettier today just so I could set your pot on fire and buy you twenty more… You’re evil,” He looks at me like I’ve masterminded the biggest robbery of the century. 
I narrow my eyes at him, lifting my hand to smack him again. “And you’re on timeout. No more baking today.” I start putting away the dishes I had ready.
“Hey! Who’s older here?” Donghyuck begins helping me sort the supplies into the pantry.
“I’m pretty sure I am,” I say, trying to remember if we told each other our birthdays back then.
“When were you born?”
“May.”
“Shit,” He mutters. He tosses the burnt pot into the trashcan, wincing at the char. “Okay, let’s keep the ball rolling. What’s your favorite color?”
I laugh, “Really? Also should I save this dough for tomorrow when we try again?” I hold it up to show him and inspects it.
“Yeah, why not? Just wear a trashbag or something tomorrow.” I kick him in the foot and he chuckles. “But yes, really. What’s your favorite color? I like red.”
“Purple,” I play along while saran wrapping the dough. “Favorite food?”
“Kimchi jjigae,” he spits out, with no hesitation. I nod along, remembering all the times he’s requested it as a midnight snack while we bake. “What do you like to do besides baking?”
“I like to go on walks. When I moved out of the city and with my dad, we lived near the beach. It was nice to just walk on the shore only five minutes away from me. I miss it sometimes. I should probably visit soon.” I tap the bowl mindlessly, trying to figure out my schedule.
“You should take me,” Donghyuck says. He’s right next to me now. “I always wondered where you went after I stopped seeing you. I assumed you were still in the city, until your grandma told me you moved-moved.”
“Ohh, no, yeah. I moved. It was hard leaving everything I knew, but at the same time, I learned so much when I was there with my dad. Come with me next time, and we can hangout on the beach. Nothing should be too flammable there.” I tease, bumping his hip with mine. He laughs with me, but I can tell his mind is somewhere else. His eyebrows are furrowed, and he looks almost guilty.
“You know, when I found out you were the Prince, I wrote down a list of questions. I was so excited to see what your life is like.” 
This grabbed his attention and my heart eased seeing his eyes light up a little more. The kitchen was relatively clean now, so I decided to prop myself up on the counter. Donghyuck always gets mad at the sudden height difference, but I can tell he loves it when he naturally wedges himself between my thighs like he does right now.
“Yeah? Do you remember any?” His hands were pinned on either side of my hips, forearms pressed against my outer thighs. It’s comfortable. I’m not sure when we got so comfortable. “This is kind of like ‘Princess and The Pauper.’”
I snort trying to remember my list. “I think I wanted to know how many crowns you had.”
“Classic question. I’m pretty sure I have three. My head’s kinda small, so it actually takes awhile for them to make it.”
I hum, investigating his head. “I can tell.”
“Mean.” He lightly pinches my thigh and I stop staring at his skull.
“I also wanted to know if you had any royal pets.”
“A cute, small, white dog. Yep.” He nods, like he’s impressed with himself for having such a basic dog and I have to laugh. 
“Any cool cars?”
“Tons,” He brags. “Okay, what does ‘Adult You’ want to know?”
There’s always been a question I wanted to ask him since I started hanging out with him again. It nagged in the back of my mind as I watched him, always happy, always cheering everyone on. Despite his bright facial expressions and body language, I could tell it was tiring, it must be. I never imagined the royal life to be hard, or as hard as my own, until I met him again.
I look at his face, checking for any signs that I shouldn’t be asking him. But he looks at me with such softness and openness, that I don’t hesitate to ask.
“Are you happy? Like… do you like being the Prince?”
His eyes widened at my question and he looks down at my lap to think. He takes longer than I expect, and I assume no one has ever bothered to ask. His silence is telling.
“Hey…,” I reach for his face to lift his chin up. “It’s okay to say you’re not. You don’t have to be all the time.”
He flinches like this was a concept he couldn’t accept for himself. I grab his face a little tighter so he really hears me.
“As long as you’re at least looking for your happiness, that’s all that matters,” I stroke his cheek with my thumb. “You deserve all the happiness, Hyuck.”
I can see his mind slowly wrapping around my words as something in his face shifts. He looks hesitant for a different reason.
“And what if I find my happiness in you?” I gasp, instinctively letting go of his face slightly. He’s fast to bring his hand up to keep mine there. His fingers slot between my gaps. He looks desperate to keep me here.
Knowing my words hold immense weight, I still don’t stop myself from saying, “Then I’ll be that for you, in whatever way I can.”
Despite me being vague, Donghyuck takes all that he can. His face blooms into a smile and I return it, knowing it was cause of me. He holds my hand this time and brings it down to my lap, sighing happily.
“Thank you.”
And for a split second, I’m scared for what I’ve promised. After all, he’s the prince and I’m the pauper.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Donghyuck is the happiest he has ever been. Unlike how it was when he was a kid, he’s attending his classes, his meetings, and even having lunches with the princesses the Queen sends over. However, he can’t promise that these dates are leading up to a potential marriage. He’s doing just enough so that his mother doesn’t get suspicious. Best of all, for most nights, he gets to sneak into the kitchen and talk, bake, and laugh for hours.
The secret hangouts are going amazingly. He can tell she’s warming up to him as she did back then or maybe it’s just the fire from the oven heating up the place. Last week, the kitchen at her new bakery finally finished being built and he knows this because he hired his staff to make sure the job was done well without telling her. That day he expected her to come in and tell him that she had to stop seeing him, but she still showed up like clockwork – two to three times a week. 
Next week, her bakery is set to have its grand opening and Donghyuck hopes this isn’t what actually stops her from coming to see him. He’s even practiced his baking skills on his own and eaten less of the fruit while they’re together in hopes it doesn’t make her want to leave again. And so for the following week, Donghyuck is treading carefully.
“Do you need help with that, Princess?”
“Should I preheat the oven for you?”
“Here, let me tie your apron.”
“I’ll carry that for you.”
All of these mini acts of chivalry are met with a suspicious gaze and a light dusting of red on her cheeks. Donghyuck feels a sense of achievement whenever she accepts his help. And this all leads up to the night before her grand opening.
Donghyuck is lighting the last candle when the sound of keys unlocking the side kitchen door is heard. He quickly blows out the match before scurrying behind the table to greet her with a “Surprise!”
“Donghyuck! Don’t do that! God, I thought I was caught for sneaking in.”
He rolls his eyes at her lackluster reaction and reorients himself. 
“I said… Surprise!” He dramatically waves his arms around to show all the work he put into decorating the kitchen. She finally notices her surroundings and her eyes light up. Donghyuck can feel his heart soften, compared to how it was racing earlier trying to set all of this up without his staff.
“What… what is all of this?” Her hands are covering her mouth in disbelief. There are streamers and fairy lights gracing the walls and candles are littered all around the room. Donghyuck is standing in the center with a single cupcake in his hands.
“Congrats. I heard from the grapevine that your bakery opens tomorrow.” She laughs at his theatrics and sets her bag down to look at the cupcake he’s made. In messy red font, the top of the treat reads the name of her bakery. She almost wants to tear up.
“Only one? Are we sharing?” She takes the cupcake from his hands and he tries not to think too hard about her fingers touching his.
“Well, I made that myself, and I personally don’t trust that I didn’t mess up the recipe in some way. So if anyone’s getting food poisoning tonight, it’d be you.” He taps her nose. “Eat up!”
At that, her jaw drops and she keeps the cupcake at a distance as if it’s some nuclear substance.
“Do you secretly want me dead?” She laughs.
“Hey, when it comes down to a royal and a baker. The baker’s going.” Donghyuck mimics his throat being slit and bites his lip to stop himself from smiling too hard. He loves to mess with her.
“You are the worst. Way to look out for your people, your highness.” She begins to unwrap the cupcake, taking a sniff out of precaution.
“‘Your Highness’? Aw, Princess, don’t be like that.” He moves closer to her and she shifts back, tutting.
“Nope. As a baker under your kingdom, I will gladly sacrifice myself by eating this cupcake. Alone.” She dramatically curtsies before going in for a hesitant bite.
Donghyuck swiftly beats her to it and takes a large bite out of the other end as her lips touch the cupcake. Her eyes widen in shock and he sends her a wink before brushing the crumbs off his mouth.
“Now you can’t tell me I don’t care about my people,” He says while chewing the weird texture of his creation. Donghyuck smirks at the deer-in-headlights reaction she has on her face. 
She gulps, shaking her head so that her hair hides her blush. She sets the cupcake down, not wanting a reminder of how close his face just was.
“Well, it’s edible,” She jokes. Donghyuck’s tongue prods the inside of his mouth as he takes in what was supposedly a compliment.
“Says the one who took the smallest bite known to man,” He accuses, pointing at the cupcake.
“How was I supposed to take a bigger one when you practically shoved your face into it and devoured half?” Once again, she’s reminded of what just transpired and feels her cheeks growing warm.
“Ooo, did I make you flustered? Scared your lips were about to touch mine?” Donghyuck takes a step closer and brushes a nonexistent crumb off her lip with his thumb. He hopes she doesn’t feel his heart pounding like fireworks.
Like she can sense his fake confidence, she grabs his wrist. “Is that what you were thinking about when you took a bite? Kissing me?” She tilts her head to the side and his whole body buzzes.
Before he could crumble even further, he tears his hand out of hers. “Please. Like I’d let anyone touch these royal lips.” He turns around to calm himself down and pretends to busy himself with something on the fridge.
He hears her laugh behind him. “I bet they’re not as sweet as a baker’s.”
He turns around and narrows his eyes at her. “How did this grand opening celebration turn into you messing with me?” Accepting defeat, he resorts to fake anger and his signature pout.
“You started it,” She playfully rolled her eyes. “Anyways…”
With the softest smile, she says, “Thank you, Hyuck. I really appreciate you.”
He returns it, “Always.”
The rest of the night is filled with laughter and playful bickering as the two avoid finishing the mysteriously textured cupcake. Donghyuck makes multiple attempts to pit the blame on her as the teacher, and the soon-to-be bakery owner fails to leave and sleep early at the expense of the Prince’s whines. To be honest, the lack of sleep was worth it if she got to spend more time with him.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Now that the bakery is well past its grand opening and flourishing greatly, I’ve gotten my days back. My employees are well-trained and seasoned and I feel comfortable taking days off when I need to. Oddly, my new opened-up schedule was somehow sensed by Donghyuck and I was invited to the palace during the daytime for the first time ever. I was nervous at first to be sneaking in in broad daylight, but he assured me that if I followed the steps he gave me exactly, I’d be fine – not that reassuring. 
As written in his note, I greeted Yunseo, the guard, as usual, and he gave me weird looks, going back and forth between the sun and my face.
“You know the sun is out, right?” He asked, still looking at me funny.
I gave him the most incredulous look. “You’re joking? It’s not nighttime?” I made an effort to crazily look around and he sighed.
“Alright, alright, I get it,” He shook his head. “What are you doing here?”
“Thought I’d switch things up,” I shrugged, not wanting to reveal who I was meeting.
Yunseo nodded, “Fair… okay, be careful, okay? The palace feels a little frantic today.” With that, he opened the gates for me and I gave him a smile.
“You’re the best. Make sure to stop by sometime this week, I have pastries for you.” I waved goodbye as he promised to come. 
Following Donghyuck’s poorly drawn-out map, I realized our meeting point isn’t the kitchen and that he’s taking me on an obscure path that the Queen and King definitely are not aware exists. As I walk through centuries-old, dimly lit stone walls, I think about how many times Donghyuck has used these secret passageways and if little Donghyuck used these when he snuck out to see me, 15 years ago. I can imagine 7-year-old Donghyuck discovering these routes within the castle’s walls.
“Stop right there!” A voice echoes through the abandoned hallway.
My heart spazzes and as loud as my brain is yelling at me to run, my feet don’t budge. I curse under my breath and crumple Donghyuck’s map in my hands, remembering to kill him unless I die right here. And if I do happen to die here, then I have to make sure I return as a ghost, haunting that man for life. I turn around slowly, eyes half closed, to see who’s behind me, but there’s no one there. There’s no one in the passageway at all. I whip around a few more times to confirm and I notice a crack in the wall to my right. It’s a peephole overlooking the actual palace hallways.
Out of curiosity, I look through and I see the Queen, face as red as the beautiful gown she adorns.
“Prince Lee Donghyuck,” his name is spat out like bile. “You will follow my orders.”
Coming into view, I see Donghyuck. He and the Queen are in the middle of a heated argument. His head is hung low and I can see him playing with his sleeves like he does when he gets anxious. I wish to reach for him, but then I remember the wall separating us.
“Your majesty, I… I can’t. I don’t want to,” He hiccups, and if I can’t see the tears on his face, I can hear them. “I never did.”
The space in my chest feels as tight and narrow as the walkway I’m in and I want to look away, but I can’t.
“It doesn’t matter what you want. You are the Prince and you are expected to marry a Princess. How dare you fool me for all these years?” As the Queen, she still carries her natural elegance, but her words burn like acid. She’s speaking to him at a normal volume, but her tone pierces your ears. 
“I-I didn’t mean to fool you. I tried my best, but I don’t love them. I don’t love the suitresses you send. And I need you to understand that I never will.” Donghyuck finally looks up and I can see the desperation in his eyes from where I stand. 
“Love?,” The Queen laughs bitterly. “I don’t need you to love them. You just need to marry one. As the Prince, what makes you think you have the privilege of being in love? Not when you have a country to rule.” There’s less anger in her words and more disappointment. 
Donghyuck winces, looking like he’s fighting back what he wants to say. His bottom lip is trembling and the grip he has on his sleeves is tight. His whole body practically shakes. Eventually, he lets go.
“If I’m not meant to love someone, then explain to me why I already do. Explain to me why I love her? Explain to me why I can’t have her?!” 
Tears are rolling down his cheeks like heavy rainfall. “I never asked for this!” He screams, and I wonder to which he’s referring to. 
My body is sweaty like I ran a mile and I feel like my breathing can be heard through the wall. He never mentions my name, but I know, I can feel, that he’s talking about me. My whole body is buzzing and I don’t know whether to feel ecstatic or sad. Despite my confusion, one feeling is clear: fear. Before I can hear what the Queen has to say, I run. 
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
“Oh God. Sorry, I was supposed to get here before you. I was supposed to be part of the surprise,” He smiles meekly, praying the puffiness from crying doesn’t make him look strange. He accidentally sniffles and hopes she blames it on the flowers and his chronic allergies.
She’s sitting in the garden chair next to the tea table Donghyuck had set up an hour ago. He scoped out a secluded spot in the royal garden and slowly put everything together. He moves to sit down across from her and she’s staring intently at the cup in front of her. 
“I asked Gran what your favorite tea is and brewed some for us. I know I don’t have your baking skills, but if we get hungry, we can sneak back to the kitchen,” he playfully winks, trying to hide the fact that he was in the worst state five minutes ago. Although he can’t bake, he can definitely make a good batch of tea. He hopes it hasn’t gone cold. 
He waits for a response, but she’s still frozen, chewing the inside of her cheek. Maybe he’s still on edge from his argument with the Queen, but she doesn’t look happy. This is definitely not the reaction he was expecting.
“Do you wanna try the tea? I bet it’ll amaze you so much, you’ll beg me for the recipe,” he teases. The teapot hovers over her cup, but she makes no move to accept it.
“Okay, no tea. That’s fine,” Donghyuck chooses to laugh it off. “Do you wanna walk around? Most of the garden is secluded so we don’t have to worry about someone catching us.”
“Would that be so bad?” The first words she whispers strike him with confusion. Her voice is dry like she just strained it.
“Huh?” He tilts his head, scooting his chair in closer to hear her.
“Would that be so bad?” She says, unable to bate her anger. “Being caught with me? Would his royal highness hate being found walking with me?”
“Hey,” Donghyuck grabs her hand from her lap, interlocking his fingers. “What’s going on?” She tears her hand out from his hold like it stung and he feels like he’s making mistake after mistake.
“I-I’m sorry, is this too much? I wanted to do something nice for our first date outside of the kitchen. Was this a mistake?” He starts to stack the plates, quickly discarding his work. “I usually don’t plan these myself, so I’m sorry if this is bad. I-”
Donghyuck sees her wince in his peripheral and feels her hand on his wrist as he’s about to haphazardly dump the tea in the bushes. Her hands are cold today.
“Date?” The word leaves her mouth as if it made her sick.
The alarms go off in Donghyuck’s mind. “Date? Did I say date? Sorry, I actually mean-”
“Donghyuck,” she cuts him off. He can see her harshly swallow. “Why are you doing this?”
He blinks. “I… I wanted to do something nice for us. It doesn’t have to be romantic if you don’t want it to be. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” Donghyuck can feel himself beginning to ramble.
“No. Why have you been hanging out with me? If it’s because you feel guilty about ditching me all those years ago, forget about it. I don’t care anymore.” She looks at him with so much intensity, not only trying to convince him, but convince herself that none of this matters.
“Princess, please. No, it’s not out of pity. You know that.” He shakes his head almost violently, begging her to believe his honest intentions. He was shocked he had to convince her in the first place, always assuming she knew his heart better than him.
Completely ignoring him, she continues, “And why aren’t you married yet?”
“W-what?” Similar to whiplash, Donghyuck feels like his brain has just been jostled. Are his ears tricking him and forcing him to relive the traumatic conversation he just had with his mother? Why is this topic being brought up?
“You’re the Prince,” she says like it’s an unwavering fact. “You’re meeting with princesses weekly. You’re meant to rule side by side as King and Queen. Why… why aren’t you married yet?” She asks and her eyes are ice cold like her hands. 
She too closely resembles the older woman who was just yelling at him moments ago. The casing around his heart begins to harden and the feeling he gets from the girl in front of him is now anger. The same bitter taste returns in his mouth.
“Are you serious?” He looks at her and the Donghyuck she knows has washed away. Betrayal, rage, and sorrow are painted across his face. It was like she was looking through the peephole again.
“Don’t ask stupid questions you know the answers to,” he mutters, words barely making it past his tight lips. He’s breathing much harder than before.
“Answer me. Why. Aren’t. You. Married.” Her hands are gripping the edge of her knees to stop them from shaking. 
Donghyuck stares at her for a long time, eyes flittering over every facial feature, confirming that she actually wants to hear the answer. Her face is firm and her question is set. He takes a deep, pained breath and leans back slightly.
“It’s because I love you.” Not like the confession he imagined in his head, Donghyuck reveals his long-term feelings like this was their end and not their new beginning. The period at the end of a sentence. The last page of a hardcover book. The last second on a timer.
She simply nods, stiff in the neck. She excuses herself before standing up, bowing, and walking away.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
“That’ll be $6.06. Would you like your receipt?”
The cash register dings with another purchase and I slump back in my chair as the customer leaves. It was a slow and agonizing shift with only two more hours till closing. It’s also been a slow and agonizing two weeks. 
I’m haunted by what went down at the royal garden almost every hour of the day. At first, I was using every chance I could get to skip work and wallow at home. But suddenly the plants in my room reminded me of him and the teacups in my cabinets smelled like the tea he prepared for us. So for the second week, I decided to dedicate myself to work. I’ve been coming in every single day and overworking myself to the point where my employees don’t know what to do but stand around. I debate whether or not to let them leave early when a familiar head of brown hair walks in. My heart picks up its pace and it’s like the teacups all over again.
“Donghyu- oh. Hi, welcome!” I smile wide, trying to hide the previous disappointment drawn on my face. The customer gives me an awkward smile back and begins browsing the pastry racks as I mentally slap myself.
I slump down to the floor behind the counter and silently groan in my hands. Why does every male brunette customer these past two weeks remind me of him? And why are there so many of them? Like every other time I’ve confused a customer with Donghyuck, the guilt begins to creep back into my system and I get flashbacks of our last conversation. 
“Why aren’t you married?,” I mock my own voice. “Are you stupid?” I repeatedly hit my palms against my head when I hear a ding from the counter bell. I quickly shoot up and brush the bangs out of my face, hoping the customer thinks I’m at least slightly normal.
“Hi, how can I hel- Grandma!” On instinct, I glance behind her, foolishly hoping he’s hiding behind her tiny frame, and my shoulders slump when I’m met with no one. So now I’m really imagining him.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, composing myself.
“Just checking in on you. I notice you haven’t been coming to the kitchen because when I come in in the mornings, my counter is actually clean,” she jokes. I smile sheepishly and nervously adjust the apron string around my neck. 
“Sorry, it’s usually Donghyuck’s fault,” I quickly clear my throat, answering a little too fast. “The Prince, I mean.”
Grandma’s eyebrows shoot up at the mention of his name and she looks down at her feet, suddenly fidgety. I notice her change in demeanor instantly. 
“Speaking of him…”
“We don’t need to,” I cut her off. “Speak about him, I mean.” I wince at how suspicious my words sound.
“If you don’t want to, that’s okay. I’m just curious… if anything happened between you two.” She whispers the last part, looking back at the customer to make sure he can’t hear. She clears her throat and steps behind the counter with me, naturally rearranging the bread in the display case. She busies herself while encouraging me to speak.
I gnaw on my lip, tapping the counter, debating if I should finally talk it out with someone. I’ve only been talking to my employees about bread starters and yeast.
“We fought.” I admit.
“About?” Grandma loads the case with more bread. I start passing them to her one by one. 
“He told me… he told me he loved me.” I press my lips together and I hear her head hit the top of the display case and the bread hit the floor. “Grandma! Are you okay?”
I crouch down, grabbing the top of her head to inspect, and she’s giving me the most incredulous look.
“He told you he loved you?!” She squealed at an embarrassingly non-discrete volume, making the customer drop the pastry in his hands. He’s looking around, frazzled, and I can see him debate whether or not he should pick it back up.
“Don’t worry about it! I’ll clean it up!” I screamed from behind the counter. 
“Grandma, keep it down,” I curse through my teeth.
She’s rubbing her head and shaking it in either pain or confusion.
“I know, I know. A Prince saying he’s in love with the baker’s granddaughter is farfetched and unrealistic. I get it.” It’s what has been circling through my brain every day.
“That’s not what I’m confused about, dear.” She looks like she’s debating what to say next. “Did you not hear?”
“Hear what?” At the end of my question, and like a universal sign, the door jingles and the mailman is rushing in, hair swept back by the wind. 
“Sorry! I forgot to drop this off this morning. It’s urgent mail.” He salutes and is out the door as quickly as he enters. 
On the counter is a letter with the royal stamp. My stomach feels queasy assuming this is the first contact I’ve had from Donghyuck since our fight, but I can’t help the naive smile that breaks out on my face. I rush to open it, not worrying about the papercuts. Every doubt that was just in my head disappeared and my grandma interjects, hoping to bring me back down from my high.
“Sweetie, wait. I need to tell you that-”
To the owner of Princess Bakery,
Prince Lee Donghyuck will be celebrating his union with Princess Nam Soohae on 26 May, 2023 at the royal garden grounds. The royal family requests a wedding cake to be made with your expertise and culinary skills. 
Please accept this royal assignment with details soon to come.
Signed,
The Lees
The words on the page silenced me and my thoughts, my breaths barely leaving my lips. My eyes kept darting across the paper; the calligraphed words are being repeated over and over again in my brain. 
Prince Lee Donghyuck.
His union.
Wedding cake.
Realization finally dawns that this isn’t the love letter or apology I was expecting from Prince Donghyuck. A breath finally escapes and it’s shaky as it wavers in the air like an offkey music note. A heart-stopping pain envelopes my chest and it seizes up to my eyes. The whites of the paper burn my irises. I catch a teardrop splattering onto the parchment. I’m haunted with images of Donghyuck at the altar with someone else. And then I’m thinking about the garden. And us. 
Surprise.
Our first date.
Because I love you.
Because he loves me? Because Prince Lee Donghyuck loves me? Prince Lee Donghyuck who is getting married to an actual princess in a week? Suddenly, it feels like the floor’s unsteady and the oven temperature was turned up to the highest. The letter wrinkles between my fingers and the ink smudges with salty tears. 
This is what I was afraid of. And yet this is what I set myself up for. I knew I should have stopped seeing him. I knew it the moment mango tarts began to remind me of him. The moment my secret ingredient of love found in every bake was powered by him and his place in my heart. Even though I meant to stop this from happening during our talk in the royal garden, that small teaspoon of hope was still sprinkled in my mind. That hope stayed every time I saw a plant, a teacup, or a brunette. But now it’s dissolved.
A new feeling washes over me. One that I haven’t felt once these past two weeks. Not false hope. Not heartbreak. And not regret.
Anger. 
“Don’t blame him.” 
My grandma’s words slice through the red and her hands on my arms attempt to calm me down. I look up through wet lashes, lips trembling.
“Donghyuck… Prince Donghyuck had no say. The royals… they never do.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be my grandma?” I clench my jaw to stop the shaking, slightly regretting my bitter words. 
Her grip is softer. “Oh honey, I am. And that’s why I’m telling you not to waste this energy on being mad at him. What you guys share is beautiful, don’t let this taint it.” She takes the letter out of my hands and physically turns me to face her.
“Shared,” I corrected her.
“Share,” She corrects me. “Your love for each other is seen by everyone. I know it can’t flourish the way love is supposed to, but at least cherish it for what it was.”
Her words reintroduce more feelings. Sorrow. Frustration. 
“I was really hoping this time it works out…” She voices my thoughts.
At this point, I’m hiccupping between breaths, caught between reliving the past and hearing these explanations. The world was never meant to have us together it seems. But at least I was told this time we had an ending.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
The next royal letter came two days after the first, and I was called to spend a week in the royal palace to test out different wedding cakes. I essentially had no choice but to say yes as the royal chauffeurs picked me up every morning to take me there. It felt like those sunrises with my grandma when I was seven but the butterflies in my stomach turned into bees. Unlike the past, I prayed I wouldn’t run into Prince Donghyuck, but with him having requested I make his cake, I’m sure he knows I’m here.
My grandma designated a portion of the kitchen to me as the head baker and it mimicked the old days as much as it could. That was until I got a visitor on the second day.
“Good morning! I’m Princess Nam Soohae.”
My eyes widened and my whisk fell out of my grasp as I took in her presence. She’s beautiful. She’s an actual princess. Her bright, toothy smile would’ve made anyone smitten if it weren’t for the fact that she was about to marry the man I loved. The pretty pink dress she wore was tinted green through my eyes. I shook my head, trying to remind myself of my place. 
“Good morning,” I bowed. “I’m the baker in charge of your wedding cake.” My smile faltered only slightly with the mention of the union.
She giggles and I almost want to laugh with her. “I know that, silly. I was sent by the Queen to sample some. Or should I say my future mother-in-law.” She bites her perfectly manicured nail with excitement.
Soohae leans her hands on the counter and peers at the bowl in my hand.
“Is there any to try right now?” Her head surveys the kitchen like a kid looking for cookies. It’s genuinely hard to dislike her.
“Um, I have a few cakes placed to the side to cool right now. There’s no frosting on it yet, but I’m sure it’d be good to try the base first!” I move to grab one of the trays and she flutters to follow me.
“Ooooh!” She gushes. “I’m so excited to try it. My own wedding cake, can you believe it?”
“No.” I almost drop the cake. “I mean, yes? Sorry. Getting married to the one you love is… it’s a crazy thing.” I cut a piece of cake and place it on a plate for her.
She doesn’t hesitate to take a bite and as she chews, she thinks. 
“I don’t love him yet, to be honest. This cake is really good, by the way.” I start cutting a slice from the other cake to sample. “But I know I will love him eventually. I already get butterflies when I look at him. I trust that he’s the one for me, I mean have you seen him?”
Before I can agree, and thank god she doesn’t give me a second to, she continues, “I know it’s silly for a person in my position to believe in the one. But I really, really do think it could be him. The other day he brought me my favorite flowers, like how did he know?!” She pops a bite of the other cake in and her eyes light up.
“Oh this is the one! Don’t even think about giving me another,” The Princess reaches for another bite and applauds me.
I laugh and make sure to note to go with the lemon base and not the mango one. As my hands are about to toss the mango cake away, my mind stops me and I consider whether Donghyuck would prefer this instead. The clanking of the Princess’s fork on the plate, finishing the lemon cake slice till it’s crumbs, reels me back and I let the cake fall into the garbage. It feels eerily like a metaphor.
For the rest of the week, Princess Soohae visits me and taste tests the frosting, fondant, and other things she wants. With every passing day, I hear more about Haechan and I can feel that her words have turned fonder. Coincidentally, her sweet tooth has gotten worse and the final components of the wedding cake are a complete sugar bomb like her personality.
On my final day, the Queen joins her. The last time I saw her majesty, she was berating the Prince as I secretly watched. It felt like I was in that hidden passageway again as she watches me prepare a slice of the wedding cake for her. My hands shake, placing the plate down in front of her and her gaze is sharp. It’s interesting how harsh her energy is when her facial features are as soft as the Prince’s. She looks like she’s been through a lot and I wonder if Donghyuck will experience the same thing when he fulfills his role as King. Like she can tell I’m thinking about him, The Queen’s eyes narrow. 
“I hope you enjoy,” I bow, and she doesn’t say a word. Princess Soohae on the other hand is completely bubbling over how good it turned out and how her guests are sure to love it too. 
The Queen simply nibbles on a piece and nods along. The black and white vibes almost give me whiplash as I stand there, watching the two of them. A sweat forms on my hairline and I’m internally glad this is my last day. I can’t go through this any longer. 
And like a karmic jinx, the kitchen door opens and a familiar brunette walks in. This time, it is him.
“Oh my! Prince Donghyuck!” Princess Soohae scrambles off her chair and bows both gracefully and clumsily. I bow as well, trying hard to hide the immediate blush on my face I get whenever I see him. I wonder if I can stay bowing so I don’t have to meet his face. The last time we saw each other was when we talked at the royal garden, and as much as I prayed I wouldn’t run into him here, truthfully, a part of me also hoped I would.
As soon as I force myself to stand up straight, we lock eyes and the strain in my chest loosens like a snapped thread. I can feel my lungs fill with air and it’s relieving to see him again after so long. It hurts in the best way as I’m overwhelmed by his presence. That familiar brown waved hair, the sunkissed tan skin, and the plump smiley cheeks. Everything is how I left it but his expression is not one I expected. He’s in complete shock and I don’t know what to do but look around the room to find something that would cause such surprise. I quickly glance at the Queen, and for the first time since she sat down, there’s a small lift in the corner of her mouth. Is she smirking?
“Princess?” He tilts his head, still staring at me before he realizes what he just called me. “Princess! Princess Soohae! I came to get you.” He runs over to grab her hand and the lifted cheekbones on her face tells me she’s grinning. 
“What- uh- what’s going on?” I’m fixated on the way he fiddles with her hand as he looks around the room for answers. 
“Cake testing? How did you forget, silly?” Princess Soohae laughs as she playfully pats his cheeks. Everyone in the room can tell she’s head over heels and my stomach hurts. As I’m clutching my stomach and the Prince stares at me quizzically, there’s one person in the room watching all of this go down.
“She’s the wedding cake baker we outsourced, Prince Donghyuck.” The Queen says calmly, gesturing to me. She tells him like it’s his first time hearing this and I’m taken aback, my movements making the utensils on the table quiver slightly.
“He didn’t know?” My mouth was too quick to voice my thoughts. “His highness, I mean.” I bow in apology.
“No. No, I didn’t.” His hands are at his side now, gripping the fabric of his sleeves. The shock left his face and now he’s staring at me with pity and then silent anger when his head turns towards the Queen. My eyes follow his and she returns his look as if to challenge him to say more. 
Completely obvious to the shift in atmosphere, Princess Soohae raves about the final wedding cake decisions and begs the Prince to try a bite. He turns her down without sparing a glance and asks her to leave with him. He doesn’t give me a second thought as he breaks eye contact with the Queen and drags his future wife away. There’s no stopping the ache that fills my chest again, slow but strong like the rising tide.
“So he still likes you.”
Snapped out of my haze, my ears don’t believe the words I hear coming from the Queen’s lips.
“Pardon?” She’s looking at me now and it’s a mixture of disappointment and disinterest etched on her face. The warmth on her face has depleted. 
“My son. Prince Donghyuck. He still likes you,” she laughs dryly. “After all these years…” 
My eyebrows furrow and I feel myself getting dizzy. Maybe this is all some sort of hallucination and the Queen isn’t talking to me right now. I grip the counter for support, and she doesn’t wait for me to respond.
“You know, I thought I handled the issue 15 years ago when I asked the head baker to stop bringing you here. I was stupid to think it would be that easy when he purposely sabotaged every date I set up for him the years after.”
She’s twirling the fork on the plate now and the scrapes make me flinch. The kitchen no longer feels like a safe space for me right now as her words slowly suffocate me. 
“And when he started to actually go on these dates this year and report back to me that they’re going well? I was foolish to think it was him beginning to try. I saw you one day, back in this kitchen. Back in his life. It all made sense and it made me so angry.” Her hands grip the fork handle. They’re dainty, but if you look close, they’re calloused, indicating years of work. Her face appears the same. If it weren’t for the terrifying state I was in, I would’ve wanted to comfort her. She looks up at me, and I felt tinier than I did before, her eyes piercing into me. 
“Do you not understand the life I’m trying to set up for Donghyuck? He’s the future king. He needs a queen, a real queen to survive in this world. As the queen, I know firsthand what he needs. My king wouldn’t be anywhere without me and his mother who set me up with him. You’re not fit for this role and you never will be.” She finally sets the fork down with a clatter. 
“Listen to me, and let him go. It’s what’s best.” Her threatening nature fades as quickly as it came and she gracefully stands up, brushing the nonexistent debris on her gown. The Queen gives me one final look, waiting for me to bow and essentially agree, before leaving the kitchen. 
The air returns and I grasp my chest to let myself breathe. Tears prick the corner of my eyes as I choke back sobs.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
“Remember, it’s the room on the right hallway. Third door. And if anyone sees you, don’t tell them I sent you. I’ll get in trouble.” My grandma hammers in the details one more time, waiting for me to nod in confirmation.
It’s the end of my final day and she asked me to deliver pastries to a room in the palace before I leave, saying her workload is too large to be going herself. I figured it’s one more thing I could do before I never step foot in the palace again. I almost turned her down earlier in fear of running into the Queen. Just the thought of that happening makes me feel sick, but I know I won’t be seeing her again after this anyways.
I scoff, “So you’d rather I get sent to the guillotine?” I tease her with an exaggerated horrified look. 
She easily flicks my forehead, despite our height difference, and I grab it wincing. “You’re lucky I don’t chop off your head myself with that attitude of yours.” She sneers at me and I giggle.
“Fair…,” I playfully mutter, soothing the area between my brows.
Her directions sent me to a room with beautiful brown double doors. I smile at the two ladies standing outside of it and I’m about to explain why I’m here before they cut me off.
“Pastry delivery for the Prince?” They say in unison.
Like a horror movie, my jaw drops and I lose my instinct to run. One thing I do know is to make sure I yell at my grandma later as I nod and tell them they’re correct. She completely set me up.
On another occasion, I would’ve appreciated the doors to Prince Donghyuck’s bedroom more, but right now, they look like the gates of Hell. I attempt to swallow whatever saliva was left in my suddenly dry mouth as I brushed my hair out of my face. The ladies allow me to knock on the door. My palms are sweaty as I shakily knock on the varnished wood, hearing it echo into the space on the other side. His room must be huge.
No responses are heard. This was my out, but my body was telling me not to leave, even though my mind was screaming to run. Instead of knocking again, I turn the knob and almost wish it wasn’t unlocked, but it was.
There he is on the other side, scribbling at his desk. His back is facing me and I watch the muscles in them move with vigor. I haven’t seen him work this hard since he convinced me to teach him how to make a creme brulée and accidentally made scrambled eggs with the yolks.
I shut the door behind me and hope it catches his attention, but it doesn’t. I gulp, realizing how very real this situation is and I almost want to throw up knowing I have to speak.
“Hyuck.”
I hear him inhale and he spins quickly out of his chair to look at me. Different to how it felt seeing him in the kitchen earlier today, his face is softer, accepting my presence. My heart floats in my chest, wondering why I was so nervous to see him when just the sight of him oozes comfort. He looks at me like he’s feeling the same way. I see the longing in his eyes and the way they warm, I close my own to stop myself from giving in too much.
“Princess.”
His voice is fragile and his choice of words makes me shut my eyes harder, scared that I’d lose all my resilience and run straight into his arms. He doesn’t correct himself this time, and he says it again with more confidence.
I finally peel them open and force myself to act cold. Just an hour ago I was finishing his wedding cake; this fire has to be extinguished.
“Princess Soohae will make a great queen.” I move to set the pastry basket down on a table near me.
“It’s not what you think. I was going to-“ He turns around in a frenzy and grabs the paper he was just writing on. The Prince takes a step closer and it takes all my strength to recoil. It takes all of me not to be swayed by the obvious hurt on his face. This will be good for us, I have to remind myself.
My hand is up, drawing the line. “You don’t have to explain. It’s not what I’m here for.”
He hesitantly puts his arm down, eyebrow twitched in confusion. The paper is still in his hands.
“I got you a gift,” I partly smile. “A wedding gift and I guess, also… a goodbye gift.” With that statement, I break away from his stare, fixating on a corner in his grand room. 
I hear paper wrinkling. “A goodbye gift?” His voice gets lower and it causes me to wince. It feels like all the tension in the room gathered in the small vacancy in my chest and the overwhelming pressure makes my eyes sting. I can already feel the tears build up as I play with the hem of my shirt. 
“Mhm,” I painfully affirm. “The wedding cake. It’s both my gift and my goodbye. I thought you requested it when I first got the royal letter,” I laugh at the situation, trying to stop myself from letting him see me cry.
“Turns out it wasn’t you, but regardless. You’re getting married and I can’t be here anymore. So I left it in the kitchen. Obviously, it’s not a goodbye-goodbye, since I’ll still be living here in the city, but… No. Yeah, it’s a goodbye,” I nod to myself, trying to unravel the knot in my throat. “I guess you took my advice, huh? Congratulations, your highness.”
The silence from him is thick and it leaves a sour feeling in my stomach. It calls me to look up at him, and his eyes are icy cold. The sweet honey brown is as dark as coal.
“This is your response?” His words are robotic, I can feel the venom on his tongue as it pricks at my heart.
“S-sorry?” I tilt my head, not understanding him. It felt terrifying to make him repeat himself in the state he’s in.
“I told you I loved you. I’m assuming this is your response.” My eyes flicker to the paper in his fist, no longer readable. Neither is his face as he gives me the blankest look. It makes me want to cry more knowing this is how I will remember our last moments.
This time, I do take a step towards him but he’s shaking his head aggressively, lower back pressed against the edge of his desk. Now I know how he felt.
“If you want to hear me say ‘I love you’, you know I can’t do that.” Just having those three words leave my lips causes a tear to roll down my cheek. 
“Because I’m the Prince?” This time, his expression changes to match mine. I can feel the frustration and pain radiating off of him, and all I want to do is to tell him what he needs to hear. But I just nod, forcing a distance.
“So it always mattered. What if… what if it was 7-year-old Donghyuck asking his princess? What would you have said? You didn’t know who I was back then. I was just… just Donghyuck.” He sighs, his body is limp as he settles onto his desk. I notice his frail build, worried that he’s been eating less.
I smile, fondly remembering the ignorant bliss from 15 years ago. But then I’m forced to remember our situation now, our ugly situation where our hearts are demanded to stay silent. 
“I would’ve told him I loved him too.”
And with that, all strength is gone as I sob into my palm. I’m trying to force the wails in, but my body is shaking. My legs feel weak and he’s over here and his arms are wrapped tightly around me in a second. I can feel his heart beating against my arm trapped between our bodies and his breath shakily blowing on the top of my head. One hand is holding me tight and the other is brushing through my hair as he shushes me. 
“I love you. I love you. I love you,” He repeats. A part of me thinks this is to calm himself down too. 
I know I’m right when I slowly pull myself back and see the red in his eyes and on the tip of his nose. My hand flinches as I’m about to caress his cheek. His breath is steadier as it now fans across my face and his eyes are lidded like they’ve finally got some rest. My hesitation vanishes as I let myself cup his face, trace the constellation painted on his cheek, and feel the sweetness of his lips on mine. The warm sensation that envelops my body makes me gasp and Donghyuck tightens his embrace on me, refusing to let go. He tasted better than every sweet treat I’ve had combined. He was intoxicating and my whole body buzzed like a sugar rush. 
I close my eyes tighter, savoring the feeling of his lips, wanting to remember every trace — letting myself be selfish this last time. He’s sugary, cozy, and soothing like the afternoon sun on my back. His mouth moves with such ease against mine and it feels like I’ve been kissing him my whole life. The feeling of his tongue gently nudging my bottom lip jolts me back to reality and I push away, seized by the cold air of his big room again. 
I bring my hands to my face, hoping to cool down the flush. The Prince is breathing as heavily and in sync with me, and all I can hear is our matching breaths and the ringing in my ears. I have to end it here. 
“Um. Congratulations on your wedding,” I say in one breath. I don’t dare look at him as I quickly bow, scrambling to his door. 
“Princess! Wait,” He grabs my wrist, almost too tight. “I can’t go through with this. Please, I-I only want to marry you.”
“Your highness…”
“Don’t. Don’t call me that. Say my name, please. Call me Hyuck. Call me Donghyuck. Anything but that. Just don’t-“ His teeth are chattering and he blinks away the tears. “Don’t leave me again.”
Without a second thought, I’m shaking my head ‘no.’ Even with tears blurring my vision, I can see the hurt on his face and I feel a part of my heart rot. It pains me just as much to reject him, but the Queen’s words swirl around in my head, unrelentless. I’m forced to leave him and my heart here and I want to scream, but I can’t. He notices that. It reminds him of himself.
Letting the finality of my decision settle in, he lets go of me, taking in a shaky breath. This was our end.
I restrain myself from taking any steps towards him as I reach for the door behind me. The wooden panel swings open, gliding past my extended fingers as I’m met with the face of the Queen.
That same hand shoots up to touch my lips, remembering what just happened in here and I bow till my hair grazes the tiled floors. 
“Your Majesty,” I squeak. She looks at me with a million emotions and plants her glare at the Prince. Like pieces of a puzzle coming together, her face twists into anger, dissecting the situation. I take this as my cue to leave but the Queen shuts the door behind the both of us. I don’t hear the Prince make any moves to save me.
“What were you doing in there?” She angrily whispers between clenched teeth. Not sure what comes over me, but the fear I felt before is gone. Instead, I’m left feeling numb.
“Don’t worry. I was just saying goodbye.” I swallow, bracing myself for her reprimands. 
A beat passes, before she speaks, this time in a normal tone. “Are you done?” 
I nod, “Yes, and I’d like to be excused from attending the wedding to serve the cake.” The Queen’s eyebrows quirk up, shocked that I’ve made a request. I look her straight in the eyes so she knows I mean it.
“I can’t… I can’t be there for that. I believe I’ve done all the preparation I can and I am not needed to actually attend.” My confidence waivers, and I draw my attention back to the ground.
“Fair enough. You don’t have to attend. I’ll tell the other bakers to serve it.” I take my chance to meet her eyes again and I can almost see concern on her face. I shake my head of that ridiculous thought, and offer her my best smile.
“Thank you, your majesty.” I bow before dragging my feet off the palace grounds. Hoping to never set foot in here ever again.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Bells. I plan to remove all bells from my bakery. The royal wedding bells have been ringing all morning and I don’t need any more reminders moving forward. 
I spent the whole night crying after leaving the palace and then my anxiety kicked in, trying to get me to map out my life without him. Naturally, I planned to pour myself into work and here I am, out of bed, manning the shop by myself on his wedding day. I may have cried into a batch of dough in the morning, but baby steps are important. This is only day one anyways.
I realized I made a mistake leaving the house when I overheard everyone in town talk about the wedding of the century. I even let my employees off for the day, mainly to have my space to wallow alone. Practically everyone was outside the palace gates, waiting to get a glimpse of the couple. The streets were currently empty and I wonder if I should just close up shop. 
Right when I was about to count up the cash and close out the register, the bell on the door jingles. I’m halfway into the one dollar bills when I roll my eyes at the sound, pressing my lips together to stop a groan. I make a mental note to remove the bell before I leave.
I look up to check on the customer and I see a man with, of course, brown hair surveying the bread on the back wall. All I can see is the back of his head as he peruses. I scoff to myself at the instant fluttering of my chest at yet another brunette customer. Is no one blond anymore? Are gingers that rare for me to never encounter one in my bakery?
I finish counting the ones and I move onto the fives when I realize he’s still standing in the same spot. I’m organizing the bills in my hands as I examine him. Normal guy. Black hoodie. Jeans. 
Maybe he’s just really indecisive. I can see him tapping his foot from the counter. I decide to offer help after I finish counting the five dollar bills.
With the last dollar to count, I place it in the tray and slowly walk over to the man. As I get closer, my stranger danger instincts kick in and I suddenly regret my decision. His foot is still shaking and from this close, I can see him fidgeting with his sleeves in front of him. I grab a pair of tongs from the closest case and approach him.
“Excuse me, sir? Can I help you find something?” I have the tongs gripped with both hands, discreetly but ready to swing. 
I see his body tense and my breath hitches, thinking I’m really going to have to hit this man with my makeshift weapon.
He turns around painstakingly slow and I raise the tongs instinctively to block my face, before letting out a squeal.
But then I see his face. And different bells go off.
“Oh my god. Hyuck?”
The bags under his eyes are prominent and I finally notice the way his hair has been pulled in different directions. His lips are dry as he cracks a sheepish smile. He’s rubbing the back of his neck and notices the kitchen utensil in my hands.
“Were you gonna hit me?!” His mouth is open in surprise and he’s taking the tongs from my hands. I let him and put my hands up in defense.
“You were standing there for so long, all fidgety! I’m alone in here, what was I supposed to think?” I fight back, taking the tongs back and clutching it close to my chest.
He lets out a long sigh, seemingly frustrated with himself as he runs his hands through his hair. I hate that I find it attractive.
“Wait.” He looks up at me through his lashes, swallowing. “What are you doing here?” I ask. He blinks, knowing that question was coming. 
I expected to feel sick awaiting his answer, but instead my heart is racing, anticipating his next words. I almost feel that false hope I felt a week ago, and I try hard to deny it. But the way he’s looking at me leaves me with no doubts. 
I’m about to push him out the door when he digs a hand into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper. The wrinkled piece of paper from yesterday. He plays with it in his hands as he thinks about his next move.
“I was drafting a request to get the law changed.”
His words peak my interest. I set the tongs down and let him continue. Wrapping my arms around my waist for security, I’m fearful of what he has to say next.
“I’ve actually been working on it for the past two months.” He flattens the paper out in his hands. “You caught me finishing the final draft yesterday. I didn’t expect it to take up until my wedding day…” He laughs, unhumored by the situation. 
He hands it to me. “This is an old copy now, but it’s actually already being reviewed by the King. Right now. Being who I am, I fled just in case.” 
He looks at me anxiously as I read the top of the page, the words in bold:
Formal Petition to Repeal the Royal Marriage Ordinance 
Written By Prince Lee Donghyuck
My eyes don’t believe what’s written, like the royal letter I received not too long ago, requesting I bake the royal wedding cake. The same royal stamp and all rests in the top left corner. 
This time, I can read the words clearly. They settle into my chest, leaving me with such a funny feeling. I read the text and I can tell it’s written by him. I imagine him staying up every night after we meet in the kitchen, working by himself on this proposal. All of his hard work for the past couple months was printed on this very paper. All this work… for us. 
I feel my cheeks wet from pure joy and I cover the smile straining my mouth. A rush unfurls through my body like sweet, sweet sugar and I look up to share it with him. 
“Donghyuck… You-?”
“Marry me.” 
He gets down on one knee, holding my free hand. He’s rubbing that one spot on my ring finger and it feels unreal. The gleam in his eyes reminds me of the toasty fires in the oven, the glistening mangos on his favorite tart. His smile matches mine, nervous just slightly, and I want to paint this memory in my brain forever. The love and desperation in his eyes are begging me to think of him. Think of us. Every fear that had been eating away at me the past month was overcome by his pleas. This paper and his actions are proof that we can happen.
He continues, 
“Princess, please marry me. I’ve only wanted to marry you almost my entire life. I know that sounds crazy, but how can I doubt my obvious soulmate? You always come back to me, but I still don’t want another reason for you to have to leave. So please, trust me and trust us. Forget everything and everyone else and say you’ll marry me. If this petition doesn’t pass, I’ll continue to fight. Just…
Say you’ll be my princess forever.”
I tug his hand softly to get him to stand up. He obliges and I free my hands to hold his face. He finally breathes and closes his eyes, leaning into my touch. I can feel him relax and his hands rest on my hips, drawn like a magnet. My mind is bouncing back and forth trying to contain the frenzy in my heart and the steady warmth of my core. I tap his eyelid lightly with my thumb and ask him to look at me. He opens them slowly, fear still trickling in his irises. I smile at him.
“My Prince,” His breath hitches. “I love you too.”
Donghyuck wastes no time tucking his head into my neck and lifting me against his body. He spins me around between the cases of bread and I giggle, feeling his heart beat erratically against mine. He softly lets my feet touch the ground and we’re looking at each other again, tears adding sparkles to his eyes. I wipe them away instantly.
“Thank you for coming back,” he whispers, but it feels like he said it with his whole being.
“Always.” I say with just as much commitment.
We’re cherishing the moment together, laughing at how happy we get to be, when the wedding bells go off once more. I look at him with confusion and he shrugs, just as lost.
“I can’t believe my wedding cake is going to waste,” I pout, remembering all my hardwork. And he squeezes my hip at my choice to be silly, snickering.
“I can’t believe you went with a lemon cake. Do you even know me?” He teases, pretending to be hurt. I gasp, slapping his chest.
“I’ll make sure to go with the mango tarts for ours.” I press a soft kiss on his lips and he smiles with me, pulling me unbelievably closer. 
“I like the sound of that,” Donghyuck hums.
“I’m sure you do.” I laugh.
Donghyuck and I stand there in each other’s arms for as long as our legs allow. We talk about the past, how it felt to leave each other. We talk about the garden and I admit to catching him talk to his mom, which explains everything he needs to know. Even as I’m profusely apologizing, he’s doing the same, saying sorry for putting me in such a situation. I choose to ask about Princess Soohae and he bites his lip nervously, telling me he hasn’t handled that predicament yet. I almost drag him out of the bakery at the sound of that. We even go over his repeal proposal and I call him out for some typos.
Eventually we move to the kitchen, doing what we do best, and what we’ve done for years, waiting for someone to find him. The Prince and his Princess.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
A/N: i hope you enjoyed!! pls like, reblog, reply, whatever!! if u want hehe
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bones-of-a-rabbit · 3 months
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the babbit masterpost
HELLO welcome to the Babbit's Blog masterpost!!! On this post you'll find some fun facts about yours allegedly (me <33), some ref's for my different 'sona's, and a couple links to my fics and whatnot! Are you ready? No?? Excellent neither am i let's do this
Meet the Babbits!: the self-inserts/personas
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the first ref is for my general/most commonly used persona, Babbit! They aren't really an anthro/furry as much as they are a humanoid with the head of a rabbit. I like to think of this one as the 'me' that's in my head- the purest form of my thoughts and feelings, but not the solid real-life me. The second ref is my self-insert persona, Rabbit, the one i picture using most often when i'm reading a fic or imagining a self-insert scenario lol. This one is like the me that people see and meet and speak to in real actual life, if that makes sense. It's the way I come across to people and all of the things I wish I could iron out of my crumpled up real-self <3 The third is a much more specific 'sona, Hazel, who started off as a FNaF:SB animatronic self-insert. She does have a backstory and lore now, which i think makes her more of an OC than a self-insert, but a lot of her is still me and a lot of what she experiences in her backstory is from my life/instills the same feelings that were taken away from things that happened to me, so I think she kinda counts enough to put a ref for her here sdkjfsdhfj (Why the different names?: makes things a little easier, and they hold meaning to me symbolically, I guess!)
Content!: Here's a short list of my various fics that will get updated as I create more! (it was, in reality, not fine.): FNaF Sun/Moon x Reader fanfic, gender neutral, for general audiences, fluff-fest, idiots to lovers "You're the new tech/repairman at the Fazbear Mega Pizzaplex, unfortunately. Your first task? To make the Daycare Attendant into two separate animatronics. It's an amazing opportunity, really, and there is nothing you love more than getting a chance to really work with such tech! The only bad part is that you don't know how to tell anyone that you just might be in over your head. (You are extremely in over your head.)" After Everything Was Fixed (but you were still broken): AU FNaF Sun/Moon x (Animatronic) Reader, gender neutral, read with caution, angst, harm to sentient robots, traumatized main character, hurt/comfort slow burn, romance slow burn "The virus was gone. Everyone was fixed. You had been put back together. It's a time for a new beginning, to do things right this time, to wash away the past and paint a better future. Their memories of the infection had- mercifully- been taken away from them. Yours had not. He doesn't understand why you try to avoid him. Even if you could tell him, you're not sure you would. You want to be his friend, but it's difficult; every time you see him, you remember the hundreds of times he killed you." A fic where you are a repairman-themed STAFFbot, taking place post-virus. In the past, Moon, infected by the virus, took delight in attacking and dismantling the reader during the night. Now, in the present, you find yourself burdened by the memories of the past while everyone around you has no recollection of the events. It gets more complicated as Sun and Moon, both now cleared of the virus, grow curious of you. This fic will follow a series of arcs, presently on arc one. For anyone curious, feel free to send an ask about the arcs in 'After Everything Was Fixed'! The Sun, the Moon, and the Blazing Comet (title subject to change): AU FNaF Sun/Moon/Eclipse x Reader, gender neutral, teen and up audiences, travel/journey, betrayal, hurt/comfort slowburn, reconciling, themes of breaking the mold, found family (TBA) Hold My Broken Hands (title subject to change): AU FNaF Sun/Moon x Reader, gender neutral, mature audiences, dark romance, dark comedy, severe bodily harm, mutilation, murder, obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, lovesick (TBA)
My AU's!: i'm going to make a Babbit-AUs-Masterpost and then put the link here i swear, i just have so many im sorry jdfhsjdfhs (like more than twenty)
Fandoms!: I enjoy, have been in, made or make content for: Pokemon Undertale FNaF Creepypasta (YEAH I KNOW LET ME LIVE OKAY) My Little Pony (I KNOW OKAY LEAVE ME ALONE) Steven Universe Star Trek Warrior Cats i'm sure theres more but i just forgot everything i have ever liked wheeeeeze
Whomst the hell?: HI I'm Rabbit! Or Bones! Or Babbit! Or Avarice/Ava, if you want to go for a more legitimate-sounding name. I'm 24 years old, prefer to use they/them pronouns, and so, so incredibly ace. I've been drawing as long as I've had the ability to hold a pen, writing since I was in grade school, and being a plague to the ones around me since the beginning of time! If you've seen my art, its probably from the absolute mountain of fluffy-wuffy love-dovey (y/n) x Sundrop/Moondrop/Eclipse doodles I've been sharing for several years now sdfjhsdj. If you've heard of my fics, it was probably the one I made just for fun that's now turned into an actual fanfiction that I enjoy writing, the silly-lovey-fluff incarnate (it was, in reality, not fine.) !
Likes n Dislikes!: I'm a sucker for sap, fluff, and lots and lots of love-dovey bullshit! I also like stories about finding oneself and monsters being befriended or loved. I like space, aliens, robots, the odd and strange, injecting humanity into things not human, monsters, creatures, animals, the fae, concepts of spirits and karma and the afterlife, and more! I dislike 'fanservice', most anime tbh LOL it's not personal I just don't enjoy it im srry, FLY BABIES i know they have an actual name but i hate that word too pls just dont i will scream, sexually aggressive/forceful content/characters, being made to feel small, dumb, or trapped,
Other!: I have a pretty high gross-out tolerance! I also have a pretty high 'wow that's messed up huh' tolerance, in that sometimes I will just say stuff that's super grim or dark or messed up and not realize it lmao. I am full of random facts and anecdotes, especially weird or gross ones! sometimes i get on tangents that can go for actual hours so pls forgive that lol
WARNINGS: THIS BLOG MAY FEATURE CONTENT BASED ON/RELATED TO THEMES OF GUILT, CHILDHOOD LOSS, GRIEF, SELF HATRED, DISCONNECTION FROM REALITY/SELF, TRAUMA, AND SEVERE DEPRESSION/ANXIETY. YES I AM GETTING HELP. YES I AM OKAY. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE AND UNDERSTANDING.
bonus persona: crybaby
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ahgasegotarmy116 · 9 days
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Do it for Him | Do You Even Love Me? | Jeon Jungkook
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Summary: Voicing the thoughts that had been on your mind for so long leaves you broken and regretting every decision you've ever made. Pairing: Daughter in law reader x Father in Law Jungkook (Yändere) Word Count: 1.1k~ Warnings: An argument and some explicit language (kinda but not really) a/n: This is a hypothetical situation and is NOT what happens in the story. Oc and Jungkook don't end up together and I'll be writing another bonus chapter about how everything ends but this is simply a longer drabble that I just decided to make into a bonus chapter since I think some of you would be interested in reading it 😁 P.s. Requested by an annon 💜 (also written in one sitting so ignore any mistakes lol) Series Masterlist
"How was your day today?" I ask half heartedly, wondering if he'll actually speak to me like a human being today or skip to having sex again like he's done almost every time he's come to visit lately.
"It was fine but I don't want to talk about work since it looks like someone's been missing me huh?" he taunts, taking my want for interaction with him as a sign of an insatiable hunger he wishes I shared.
"I did miss you but I missed being with you, not just sex" I say, pressing on his chest to keep some space between us to show I'm serious and want to talk about this.
He stops and waits for me to continue but his eyes don't leave my body for a second.
"When I told you I loved you I didn't mean for our life to end up like this" I say, referring to the way we've been living for the past year.
"What's wrong? Did you need something else? You have my credit card and I told you before that you didn't have to ask me for anything. If you want it then get it. It's the least I could do for my beautiful Angel" he says while caressing my face but I take a step back, not letting him put me under his spell again.
"I'm not talking about money Jungkook. I'm talking about how I told you I didn't want to live as 'The other woman'. You told me you were going to get a divorce and let the children and I move in with you. Not just have you pop by at this separate house you have us living in" I say. 
He turns around and heads to the kitchen, gulping down a glass of water and placing the cup down on the counter. "I told you I would take care of it" he growls out while leaning both hands against the sink, clearly not appreciating the topic of conversation when all he had been looking for was a quick fuck.
"You told me that a year ago and from what I've seen you've been lying to me this whole time. Have you even filed the papers? You know that neither of you love each other so what's the point of keeping this whole charade going?" I say, following after him and standing my ground, not letting him drop this.
He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to center himself so he won't blow up on me like he has in the past. "These things take time Angel, plus going through a divorce would make my company take a big hit and might ruin some of the relationships I've built" he tries to explain but I'm not having it.
"If your company is all you care about then maybe all of this was a mistake" I say, turning around to walk into my bedroom with him following lazily behind me.
"You know I care about you too Angel" he says, leaning in the doorway while I've decided to plot down on the bed, running my fingers through my hair and trying to figure out if any of this was a good idea.
From the looks of it to any outsider this whole relationship was bound to go up in flames sooner or later. My life wasn't supposed to be like this. Was I really that naïve to think that somehow things would change if we were actually together? Did I really think that he was capable of loving me too?
"No I don't know that. I know that you love my body and that you love having sex with me and the idea of being with me and stealing me away from your son but I don't even know if you actually love me. Y/n. Not Angel, not the mother of your children, not the daughter in law that you took advantage of, just me" I spout off everything that's been on my mind and I can see that he starts to more or less assess our relationship and I really hope I'm going to get the answer I'm hoping for.
"You knew who I was when you first met me. You knew who I was when you married my son and you definitely knew what you were getting yourself into when you left him to be with me. I'm not this loving and kind husband that you want me to be and deep down you know that too. Do I care about you? Yes, I do. Do I love you? I don't know. I don't know if I do and I don't know if I ever will and if that's not good enough for you then be my guest, say the word and we can end this right now" he says and every condescending word that falls from his lips is like a knife through my heart.
I choke back a sob as my eyes glass over leaving him rolling his eyes, clearly not having the patience to deal with this today. 
"Seems like you've got some stuff to think about and from the looks of it I've got some business to attend to" he says, hinting at the headache it's going to be for him to go through with this divorce. 
He strides over to the bed where I'm sat with my head down, trying and failing to hold back my tears and picks up my chin. "Just remember who you're dealing with Angel okay? It will make all of ours lives so much easier if you stop thinking that you can change me" he says, caressing my face again, driving the knife deeper. 
"I am who I am and if you can't accept that then I think we have some hard decisions we'll need to make here" he says a wipes away a few of my tears before tapping underneath my chin twice and walking away. 
"Where are you going?" I ask, getting up and following him out, my vision going glossy. "It seems you're not in the mood that I thought you might be in so I think it's best if I go. Give my love to the children" he says over his shoulder and walks out, leaving me speechless and beyond heart broken, mourning the life I had with his son all over again and missing the feeling of loving someone and being loved in return. 
"What have I done?" I whimper, sinking to the floor and sobbing, wishing that I could take it all back. That I could start over and never get mixed up with this family no matter how in love I was with his son. I never knew that a love that was once so pure would be traded for one that is so devastatingly one sided, wrecking my life beyond compare and stealing what little pieces of me I had left. 
Read series from the beginning
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misc-obeyme · 2 months
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OBEY ME ZODIAC SIGNS
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I mentioned in this post that I had opinions about this & @impish-ivy left a tag saying she’d like to know my thoughts on it. And as we all know, a single tag is all it takes! So here I am!
Lemme start by giving you my qualifications… I have none. Unless you count growing up with a hippie for a mom who was really into the zodiac & astrology so I spent all my life hearing about it. And I mean she’d read books to me on the topic. She also taught me quite a bit about the tarot and I could get into some symbolism there, too, but let's save that for a different post. (Not me assigning each character a card from the Major Arcana.)
Nowadays I mostly use it to help me remember the birthdays I choose for my OCs lol. It's fun to think about for character creation. But in the end, this is all just my opinion based on what I know of the zodiac! It's all just for fun~
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For quick reference, I am going to list the zodiac signs, their symbols, their associated element, and their date ranges.
Aries | The Ram | Fire | March 21 - April 19
Taurus | The Bull | Earth | April 20 - May 20
Gemini | The Twins | Air | May 21 - June 20
Cancer | The Crab | Water | June 21 - July 22
Leo | The Lion | Fire | July 23 - August 22
Virgo | The Virgin | Earth | August 23 - September 22
Libra | The Scales | Air | September 23 - October 22
Scorpio | The Scorpion | Water | October 23 - November 21
Sagittarius | The Archer | Fire | November 22 - December 21
Capricorn | The Goat | Earth | December 22 - January 19
Aquarius | The Water Bearer | Air | January 20 - February 18
Pisces | The Fish | Water | February 19 - March 20
Please Note: I do take the cusp into consideration. When someone is born on the cusp, it means they were born on a day that is on the cusp of two signs. For example, someone born on April 19 would be considered on the cusp of Aries and Taurus. This means they can have some traits of the sign they're on the cusp of. I think of it as a date range. So in the above example, I would consider April 17 - April 22 the cusp range of Aries and Taurus. The Aries traits would be stronger on the Aries side and the Taurus traits are strong on the Taurus side. I will sometimes refer to this as being a "cuspie" because lol it's cute, right?
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Okay let’s get into it because I can tell they did not consider the characters' astrological signs at all when they chose their birthdays.
LUCIFER: JUNE 6 - GEMINI
Now obviously his birthday was meant to be a reference to 666. Since it's 6/6 and all. But that cute little reference also makes him a Gemini. A GEMINI. (Hi hello, actual Gemini here, there is just no way.) Gemini is an air sign that's known for being good at communication, artistic, flighty, and easily bored. Does any of that sound like Lucifer to you? There is no way a Gemini would ever be caught dead at a factory tour, okay? (I would, but I'm also a cuspie so I got just enough Taurus in me to be interested in a factory tour lol.)
I say he should have been a Cancer. Now before you come at me and say what Lucifer as a weepy Cancer you can't be serious, don't you mean he should've been a prideful Leo? No. Because Leos also like being the center of attention. If Lucifer was a Leo, he would absolutely thrive on Diavolo's constant compliments. Lucifer is a crab and we all know it! Hard exterior, putting on that prideful and competent persona, but soft and squishy inside. Only weepy in private, but secretly longs to weep. LOL. Also? Intense mood swings because of overwhelming feelings. And also also? Family obsessed. Will kill for those they love.
MAMMON: SEPTEMBER 10 - VIRGO
As hilarious as it is to consider that Mammon is the Virgin, there is no way. Mammon as an earth sign at all is silly enough, but add in the fact that Virgos are practical and perfectionists and I'm just like… not this guy lol. I think Virgos can also be a bit shy at first too. And like you could say Mammon acts like he doesn't like you at first because he's secretly shy, but I think it's more about damaging his cool guy rep.
No, I think Mammon should've been a Gemini. Flighty air sign. Easily bored. But with a wild imagination that can come up with, you guessed it, schemes. In his case money making schemes. They also like to be aware of the trends, always looking at the new shiny things. Geminis are smart, but not always good at applying their smarts. The other thing about Geminis? They're deeply emotionally intelligent, but you can't always tell right away. This is why they're kinda known for the whole "two faced" thing (which is not really accurate tbh). They have a light and airy and fun personality on top, but underneath they can be serious and understand the needs of others. And once you befriend them, they are ride or die.
LEVIATHAN: APRIL 9 - ARIES
Absolutely not. An Aries is a bold fire sign, they're courageous, assertive, and a natural leader. That is like the exact opposite of Levi.
I honestly had a difficult time deciding what I think Levi's sign should be. But in the end, I settled on Virgo. Mostly because Virgos can be neurotic and end up worrying themselves into disorder and that sounds more like Levi than anything else. I also think the practicality and perfection can apply when considering how carefully Levi pursues his hobbies. He's always on top of when things are happening, displays his merch meticulously, and cares about all the little details.
SATAN: OCTOBER 20 - LIBRA
Uhhh sooooo I mean…. listen, the main thing about Libras, in my opinion, is that they are super friendly. They like having a large group of friends. And like Satan has connections, but I'm not sure if that's really the same thing. He's been known to isolate himself for days just to read without stopping. Like that does not seem like the social butterfly type to me. He's also a cuspie, so there could be elements of Scorpio mucking up those Libra sensibilities. But I still don't really think that makes a lot of sense.
I'm kinda feeling Capricorn for Satan. Someone who cares about rules and regulations. Someone who's willing to help family and friends at the drop of a hat. Ambitious and successful and willing to put in the work, including in relationships. Even better if you give him December 23 or 24, so he's juuuuust on the cusp of Sagittarius. Thus giving him the Sag's pursuit of knowledge quality and a lil dash of childlike wonder ('cause of how he is with cats lol).
ASMODEUS: MAY 16 - TAURUS
Truly an affront to all things astrological. Do you really expect me to believe that Asmo is a Bull? Please. Like yeah, a Taurus can be passionate, but they're also stubborn and stable and kiiinda set in their ways. And yo that ain't Asmo, friends.
Asmo should've been a Leo. The type of person who turns heads just by existing. They're unapologetically themselves and they know how enticing they are to others. A bright, bold, fire sign that'll blaze into a room, full of confidence and ready to start the party. Can be a little too into themselves, but they're also full of generosity and a warmth that attracts people. I would also have been okay with Libra, but I think Leo is more accurate.
BEELZEBUB & BELPHEGOR: MARCH 11 - PISCES
This one fits. Beel really is a Pisces. Emotional, caring, highly family oriented. Maybe a little weepy. Pisces is a good choice for the twins. Not only do you have the dual fish as their symbol, but I think Belphie is what you get when a sweet Pisces suffers from intense trauma. Zodiac signs only really take into consideration general characteristics. People change how they act from life experience, too, and no amount of being born under the fish is going to change that for Belphie. Inside, he's got that caring and emotional state that Beel wears on his sleeve. Belphie just had to build armor around it because that's how he has reacted to being hurt. So I actually think this sign works for both of them.
DIAVOLO: OCTOBER 31 - SCORPIO
Well, he's got the passion anyway. I dunno I feel like Scorpios are also overly dramatic, tend to hold grudges, and kinda do whatever they want. Like they give in to their emotions a lot. Diavolo just doesn't feel like a Scorpio to me. Maybe if he was a little more devious than he is.
I think Diavolo should have been an Aries. The fire symbolism is nice and the fact that it's a ram is also funny (MC being a sheep right), but straight up an Aries is a good leader, they're courageous and adventurous. They love new experiences, kinda like Dia being obsessed with human world stuff he's never experienced before. They rush into things sometimes - anyone remember a baby!Dia trapping Barbatos? This is like he gets an idea in his head and he's like that's the best solution! But it isn't always and I kinda think Barb's influence has mellowed that out over the years. So yeah, Aries for this guy. Though I would have accepted Leo, too, I just don't think Diavolo is as self-obsessed as a Leo usually is.
BARBATOS: AUGUST 22 - LEO
You know, in true CC fashion, I really spent a lot of time considering what would make the most sense for Barbatos. My initial reaction to him being a Leo was no fucking way. Leos like attention too much and we all know Barb is a lurker. However, he's also on the cusp with Virgo. And I kinda think that Virgo's practicality mixed with Leo's charisma could equal out to one Barbatos. Virgos are known for being proficient and efficient and always getting the job done right. They're also known for wanting to be of service to others. Leos, on the other hand, are magnetic and generous. However, they're also really flashy and tend to be hung up on what others think of them and that's not Barb at all.
So while I think the Virgo/Leo cusp could work, they'd need to put him on the other side of it. More Virgo less Leo. Like maybe August 25. That being said, I also initially gave Barb the sign of Capricorn. If I wasn't going with a cusp situation, this is what I'd choose. It's the restraint and meticulousness. Capricorns can be taskmasters, especially when it comes to themselves. In a human this leads to burnout. Since Barbatos is a demon he seems to be able to work hard all day every day and still be okay, but he's not exactly good at resting. A Capricorn is also someone other people come to for advice because they're known for being good at everything they do.
SIMEON: FEBRUARY 10 - AQUARIUS
Aquarius is a weird sign. Like no offense to Aquarians but the symbol here is literally called the Water Bearer and yet it's an air sign? What does it mean? It means that this sign is full of super unique individuals. And yeah okay Simeon is pretty unique. I'm not like there's absolutely no way. But I do think there's a better sign for him.
Should've been a Cancer. Yes, like Lucifer. Think about it: emotional, caring, family oriented, but where Lucifer has the armored crab shell, Simeon has learned to allow some of his soft squishy to show. Both can be very mothering, they just show it in different ways. Trust me on this. HOWEVER. I actually think Simeon should have been a cuspie. Like me, but on the other side. So on the cusp of Cancer and Gemini. Mostly mothering and emotional Cancer, but with the creativity and airiness of Gemini. You know what Geminis are good at? Writing. So I think Simeon has traits from both Cancer and Gemini and would be best on the cusp. (Give him June 21.)
SOLOMON: DECEMBER 9 - SAGITTARIUS
They got this one right. Solomon is absolutely a Sagittarius. The symbol of this sign is the Archer - a centaur with an extended bow. It represents the duality of a Sagittarian's personality. An old soul with childlike wonder. Able to get excited about new things, but also full of experience and wisdom. If that's not Solomon, I don't know what is. Someone who likes to be free, enjoys exploring the unknown, is dedicated to learning but also to teaching - yeah, this one is accurate.
LUKE: JULY 15 - CANCER
Due to the fact that Luke is supposed to be a child, it's important to consider how his sign manifests in someone younger. It can be different from how an adult would be described, but the general idea is usually still the same. I kinda think Luke could in fact be a Cancer. He cares a lot about his friends and family, he's dedicated to them in a way that causes him to defend them at any perceived insult. He can be emotional, but that's also kinda just… he's a kid, you know?
And I think Luke is a Libra. He cares about everybody as mentioned, but he also likes when people get along. If we looked at who he is when he's not worrying about a demon's questionable influence, such as how he is with MC, he's thoughtful and kind, friendly. See how he is with Barbatos and Simeon. He likes learning from them and spending time with them and I think that's the sort of social butterfly Libra quality. I see Luke growing up into someone who has a lot of friends, but also likes to keep things balanced as evidenced by the Libra scales.
MEPHISTOPHELES: NOVEMBER 11 - SCORPIO
It's kinda funny that Mephisto and Diavolo have the same zodiac sign. But it also doesn't mean anything, I just find it humorous. However, Mephisto could actually be a Scorpio, more so than Diavolo, in my opinion. We have seen mostly the negative traits of a Scorpio displayed in Mephisto - jealously, the tendency to hold a grudge, possessive and resentful. But a Scorpio can also be passionate and fearless and perceptive. Mephisto has the grudge thing going on with Lucifer. And he's a little closed off to MC at first. But his perception allows him to consider how MC feels and thus makes it easier for him to understand them. Not to mention how dedicated he becomes once he is friends with someone. While I think there are probably other signs that would work for him too, I don't have a problem with him being a Scorpio.
RAPHAEL: SEPTEMBER 29 - LIBRA
What. There is no way. NO. WAY. I refuse to accept Raphael as a Libra, I'm sorry. It's just not possible.
So what is he, then? A Taurus. The Bull. Quiet, stubborn, no nonsense. Patient, well grounded, likes to feel secure, determined. While a human Taurean would be interested in establishing their career, Raphael had a different goal due to being an angel. But I think we can equate the climb to the top, becoming the youngest angel ever to be a seraph, as obtaining financial stability. It's stability, but in a different way. Secured by the rank rather than the monetary value. Only investing time in what they believe is worth the effort, but once decided they become loyal to a fault. Good at standing up for their principles, but less likely to mess with things that threaten their stability. There might be others he could be, but this one feels right to me.
THIRTEEN: JANUARY 13 - CAPRICORN
Seeing as how I made Satan and Barbatos Capricorns, I don't really feel like Thirteen fits this sign all that well. She's not restrained at all and I don't think she's overly ambitious, either. Not a taskmaster for herself or anyone else.
Thirteen is an Aquarius. A rebel, someone who sets trends, someone who doesn't care about rules. Thirteen is a reaper who wears a school uniform that she completely modified because she likes it and she never even had any intention of attending said school. You gonna try to tell me that person isn't a rebel? Unique, quirky, and independent. That is so totally Thirteen. They also tend to fight for the collective good and while I haven't exactly seen Thirteen joining protests or anything, I don't know that I would discount this quality entirely. She's just definitely leaning more toward the quirky unique part as well as innovation (thinking up different traps for instance).
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masterlist | Thank you for reading!
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blue-slxt · 3 months
Text
The Game
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🔞Minors Do Not Interact🔞
A/N: So this was inspired by crazy, horny ramblings from discord. I just love my man and threesomes are pretty fun (even if they are a monster to actually write lol). All characters are aged up.
Pairing: Neteyam x Fem!Na'vi!Reader x Fem!Na'vi!OC
Warnings: Smut, P in V, Threesome, Oral (M and F receiving), Face Riding, Sapphic Kissing/Touching, Creampie
Word Count: 2.6k
Summary: Neteyam gets caught up in you and your friend's "game".
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Everything about this whole situation was just so unusual. Neteyam couldn't believe he found himself in this scenario. It was so unlike him to get caught up. But he had been distracted. It was supposed to be another regular trip through the forest. But something was different tonight. He got careless; he got distracted. He smelled a scent he wasn't familiar with. As many times as he's walked through this forest, he knew it inside and out and he knew that whatever this scent was, it didn't belong here.
He hushed his own breath and lightened his footsteps as he moved closer to the unfamiliar smell. It was floral, but with a hint of some type of fruit that he couldn't quite put his finger on. Peeking through the bushes, he noticed your crouched form next to the river. Your back was turned towards him and it seemed you hadn't noticed him approaching you.
He almost called out to you, but when he saw your face, his voice was lost to him. To say he thought you were beautiful was an understatement. Your features were soft and round, but there was a hardened edge to your expression. Clearly a gentle and nurturing soul, but a heart made of steel and no fear.
That's where he fucked up. He got so lost in his musings about you that he let his guard down and didn't notice the second presence coming up behind him until a strong hand grabbed ahold of his kuru and a cool blade was pressed against his throat.
"Move slowly..." the second voice speaks lowly to him.
She stands to her feet and brings Neteyam with her and moves both of them through the bushes into the clearing. "Who did you find this time, Ìze?" you say brushing your braids out of your face.
With a sly grin, she walks him closer to you, "We got a big catch this time. None other than the prince of the Omatikaya himself."
"What is this?" Neteyam asks, trying to piece together the unfolding situation.
"Why don't you tell us? You were the one watching me, weren't you?" you say walking up to him and trailing your fingers over his broad chest.
His ears pin themselves to his head feeling embarrassed at being caught and called out. "Fine. So what do you want?"
Ìze chuckles behind him, "Same thing that you want, pretty boy." Her hand on his kuru eases its grip and starts to lightly stroke the base making Neteyam's breath grow heavy.
"It's okay, Nete~..." you say his name with a sweet tease. "We just want to play with you a little bit..."
"How do you know my name?" he asks, trying to not let the quiver in his voice show.
"Oh, you are famous even among other clans, Mr. future olo'eyktan." Ìze answers finally lowering her knife from his throat. And yet, Neteyam still makes no attempt to escape.
"I've been dying to find out if the Omatikaya prince tastes as good as he looks", you continue letting your fingers dance along the waist of his tewng.
Ìze slowly circles around to his front letting his kuru slide sensually through her hand before letting it fall. Now that Neteyam could clearly see her face, he could see that she was beautiful too, but in an entirely different way. Where your beauty radiated nurturing warmth and hidden power, Ìze was beautiful in an intimidating way. She was clearly the hunter type and everything from her posture to her voice commanded respect.
"So take your pick, Nete~" Ìze teases the nickname.
Neteyam tries desperately to quickly rework his malfunctioning brain to come up with some kind of a response. But any words that come to mind, die in his throat before they ever make it to his lips. His eyes just flicker back and forth between the two of you trying to make sense of at least some part of this.
"What's the matter?" you ask, stepping closer and running your hand along his perfectly chiseled jaw. "Yerik got your tongue?"
Neteyam's not sure why he did what he did next. Maybe it was how sweet you smelled or the shiver he felt all the way down to his tail when you touched him. Regardless of why, he grabs you by the waist and pulls you in close against him.
Your eyes go wide with excitement and a devilish grin plasters itself on your face. Ìze's expression mimics your own at the unfolding situation in front of you both. You're not quite done having your fun yet, though. You lift up on your toes and press light kisses to his cheeks, his nose, the corners of his mouth, his chin, everywhere except where he really wants you. When his patience runs thin, Neteyam uses two fingers to hold your chin and keep you in place so that he can properly place a firm kiss on your lips. 
His lips are in perfect sync moving against yours, but before you can fully comprehend anything, his tongue is swiping at your lower lip begging to be let in. You eagerly grant him entrance just as you feel another set of hands wrap around you and cup your breasts. Neteyam’s tongue dances with yours where he clearly sets the tone and takes the lead and you’re more than happy to submit to him. You sigh into the kiss feeling Ìze give your earlobe a playful nip. You finally pull back from the kiss leaving a thin string of saliva connecting your lips together. 
“My turn” Ìze says still groping at your body that was thoroughly trapped between the two of them. 
She leans in over your shoulder pressing her lips to Neteyam’s and the kiss is a fierce battle of wills between the two of them. Their tongues fight for dominance as you let your hands trail lower down his toned body and you feel the outline of his dick through his tewng. Feeling how big and stiff he is right now has your breath growing heavy with anticipation. Your eagerness clearly overtakes you when your fingers get busy untying his loincloth. 
When they finally break their kiss, both of their chests are heaving for air. Neteyam locks eyes with you and his blown pupils and half lidded eyes match your own. He lets you continue on your mission to rid him of the offensive cloth until it falls while he licks and nips at your neck. He breathes in deep, heady breaths of your intoxicating scent and you make no attempt to stop him from scenting you. Ìze says in your ear, “looks like the prince has taken a liking to you” with a giggle in her voice. 
“It would seem so. I’ll take the first round and then we’ll switch?” you suggest with a slight moan escaping when his tongue glides just below your ear. 
“Sounds good to me.”
Neteyam is so lost in leaving little marks on your otherwise perfect skin that he doesn’t even hear the two of you scheming. It’s not until you push him away by his chest that he finally breaks out of his trance. Neteyam focuses on the two pairs of eyes trained on him. More specifically, on his thick cock standing tall and proud in front of him. 
“Lay down” Ìze instructs. 
His ears twitch back and forth signaling that he heard her, but his tail sways in hesitation. 
“Relax, your highness. Let us take care of everything.” you say tail practically thrashing behind you with excitement.
Neteyam feels like he’s having an out of body experience, watching himself follow your instructions as he lays down on the soft, glowy moss.
He watches on in curiosity and amazement when you and Ìze strip off your own tewngs in front of him leaving the three of you bare together. You approach him from the bottom while Ìze walks around to the top of Neteyam’s head. Getting down on your hands and knees, you crawl over to him and settle yourself between his thighs that twitch and jump under the gentle caress of your fingertips. It feels like you could start drooling when you finally hold him in your hand. He’s so thick and heavy in your grasp, your fingers can just barely fit all the way around. 
Dragging the flat of your tongue up his length, you can see Neteyam’s abs tremble with the shuddering breath he releases. Your tongue travels up his whole length and then you take his tip into your mouth. Beads of tangy precum coat your tongue and you hum around him in satisfaction at the flavor. 
The beads in his braids clink together as Neteyam’s head falls back to the ground. When he looks up, Ìze is crouched over him grinning like a devil at him. 
“Ah ah ah, eyes forward, pretty boy.” She says, grabbing his face and pointing his eyes back at you. You hold searing eye contact with him while you slide him all the way into your mouth, making small gagging sounds when he brushes the back of your tongue. 
“She’s doing such a good job for you, isn’t she? Doesn’t she just look so gorgeous swallowing your cock?” 
If your lips weren’t currently occupied, they would be tugging into a smirk watching the prince’s composure crumble. Ìze always loved taking the lead in these situations. Meanwhile, you were more of a pleaser. Nothing compared to the rush you felt when you would watch a strong warrior or proficient hunter melt under you. 
Neteyam finally can’t hold your gaze any more when you shoot a wink his way. It’s more than he can handle. His eyes squeeze close while you continue to bob your head up and down on his length. Ìze takes the opportunity to turn his face back to her and capture his lips in another heated kiss. 
Neteyam moans into her mouth when you hollow out your cheeks and he swallows the small chuckles she lets out. 
When you and Ìze lock eyes, a silent understanding is shared between you. You pull off of Neteyam with an audible ‘pop’ and Ìze pulls back from their kiss and Neteyam is left with his head still spinning figuring out what’s happening. 
“Time to see if the prince lives up to his reputation. What do you think?” Ìze teases.
“Oh, I’m sure that he won’t disappoint us” you muse, stalking closer to him and stealing a quick kiss. His lips try to chase after you when you pull away. He watches you intensely when you straddle his hips and hover right above when he really wants you to be. His hips buck beneath you trying to chase your heat. Every time he comes close, you lift your hips a little higher, keeping him from fully getting what he wants out of you just yet. He lets out a low growl of frustration, but it only amuses the two of you. 
“Now, now, don’t be such a tease. I think we’ve made him wait long enough, don’t you?”, Ìze purrs walking behind you and placing her hands on your hips.You let her help guide you to finally sit down on Neteyam’s stiff cock. The stretch is even better than you imagined. 
“Mmf!”
Every curve and ridge seems to fit perfectly inside of you. Neteyam can’t help but watch you sit down on it and watching the way his jaw falls to his chest is the exact sight that you love to see every time. 
You move your hips up and down at a steady pace, coaxing small groans of pleasure from the man under you. Ìze takes her hands off you and makes her way to Neteyam’s face.
“Don’t forget about me just yet, prince.”
She uses two fingers on Neteyam’s forehead to gently push his head down for her to straddle his face. Neteyam wastes no time having his fill of her. 
“Ahh…”
Both of you roll your hips in perfect time with each other on top of him. Your walls clench and hug around his thick cock while Ìze covers his face in her slick that he’s steadily lapping at. 
“Ahn~! Nete!” you cry out when his hips snap up to meet yours. One of his hands holds on to your hip for more leverage to rut up into you. His other hand holds Ìze in place for his tongue to reach all the right spots. 
“Haah…ah, right there!” she croons. 
“Ìze…” you breathe out, reaching your hand towards her. A smirk crosses her lips already knowing what you wanted. She leans forward towards you and uses her fingers under your chin to tilt your face up to hers and press her lips to yours. Her tongue invades your mouth, muffling the sweet moans you make from every buck of Neteyam’s hips. 
The night air is filled with the various sounds of wet skin slapping against skin and muffled sounds of pleasure from all three of you. 
Your head is swirling with all the stimulation that almost borders on being too much. The smell of arousal thick in your noose, Neteyam’s tip knocking against your cervix, and Ìze playfully licking into your mouth has you quickly approaching your peak. 
You finally break the kiss to catch your breath and notice Ìze’s glazed over eyes. It’s a look you’re all too familiar with from having done this so many times. It’s the look she gets when she’s close. She pants against your lips; the two of you practically sharing the breath. Below her, Neteyam attaches his lips around her clit and sucks on it lightly sending shock waves through her body. Her normally hardened, confident expression has melted away into something needy and wanting. Thankfully, you knew exactly what she needed. 
Your hand reaches around the back of her head and grabs ahold of her kuru. Gently stroking the base of it, you lightly purr to her “let go for us, Ìze”. 
As if you had directly spoken to oher core, her hips twitch and her thighs shake with her release that coats Neteyam’s face and runs down the sides of his mouth. Her pussy desperately clenches around nothing as she continues to ride out her high until she can come down.
Watching her like this always riled you up more. Made you go harder, faster, deeper. It was beautiful to watch every time. She was beautiful. 
Her body relaxes and she drops her full weight down. Neteyam lightly taps her thigh to signal to her that he finally needs to come up for a breath and she climbs off of his face. 
“Have fun~” she says with a slightly tired lilt to her voice, leaving the two of you to finish. 
In one fluid motion, Neteyam sits up and lays you on your back on the ground. He throws your legs over his shoulders and ruts into you with more force than before. Lightning flashes through your body. Without even realizing it, your tail coils around his bicep in a subconscious attempt to help keep your mind grounded. 
“Ah! Mm! Haah…Nete!” 
“Cum for me, tanhì” he quietly commands you, knowing that he’s probably just as close as you are. 
Your toes curl and your nails dig into his skin when your release rips through you.Your walls vice grip around him and Neteyam can’t hold back anymore. His hips stutter and lose their previously steady pace as thick ropes of white spill into you making warmth spread in your lower belly. 
His lips crash into yours, still fresh with the taste of Ìze on them. It’s disorienting and addicting in the way it seems to drag out your high and make you see stars. When he breaks the kiss, you’re both trying to catch your breath. 
“So?” Ìze inquires from somewhere behind you.
A smile spreads on your lips and you simply respond, “I told you he wouldn’t disappoint us”.
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callofdudes · 11 months
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I'm crazy and this is mainly based off my oc, but yn is prices adopted daughter that works with him, and the read is like 22-24 and price is supposed to be 45, and he kept it a secret because he's want to protect yn. I wanna see how the 141/könig reaction, can be romantic or platonic don't care lol, yes i know it's stupidly specific, but I'm stupidly specific.
You um... You have no idea, I love this. Me and a friend actually have a story plot where y/n is adopted by Price and they are y/n Price. And I will die on that hill. I'm so glad other people are in the same boat.
Let's be honest it was either Ghost or Gaz who found out first. Ghost because he's a lieutenant and he knows everything so what would you expect?? Gaz because he sits in the filing room in the basements and reads other people's files he can get his hands on for a pass time.
Ghost 💀
Wouldn't say anything at first. When you'd insisted on bringing him back home with you he really didn't fight it that much. You'd dragged him out to the airport and he was honestly just tired and annoyed by the people at that point.
But when you got your tickets and Simon saw the name said Y/n Price, he hadn't entirely registered it. It kind of went in one way and shot out the other.
You both had boarded the plane and you were a load of smiles. Roughly halfway through Simon slowly leaned over as casual as ever. "So you're Price's daughter."
Your eyes widened. "I-what!?" You looked over at him but he didn't really seemed fazed by any part of your reaction. "I'm presuming you're adopted, your biological parents names are on your file."
Your jaw dropped. "And how do you supposedly know this!?"
Simon leaned over slowly and pointed down at the ticket you still had in your hand. The top corner said the purchaser was Y/n Price.
"Oh..." You looked back at him.
"Don't tell anyone, ok?"
"Wasn't planning to." Simon shrugs.
It honestly wasn't a huge surprise to him. Considering Price was caring to all of them, but seemed to coddle you more than the average soldier. And Price just wasn't that type of guy usually.
"So... What now?" You ask, not sure why he brought it up.
"We go wherever the hell you're taking us. Misses Price."
"Simon."
"Mhm, fine fine, I'll stop."
Well, his reaction wasn't nearly as bad as you thought it would be. So you relaxed in your seat again.
Simon now knew, but he didn't bring it up often. Sometimes he'd have a small joke about it in private with you, but other than that he didn't bring it up. What was secret was secret.
He did however let Price know he knew, just in case something went astray in the future and he needed someone he could count on with that information.
Gaz 🧢
Gaz went to Price first to confirm before bringing it up to you. You'd accidentally signed one of your assessments as Y/n Price.
Price was slightly mortified when Gaz asked if it was a mistake on your part. He could have said it was a mistake but his second child is probably too smart for that.
"That's correct. Y/n Price."
Gaz hummed. "Is she your child then?? I didn't know."
"Adopted. I kept her biological parents on her file to protect her."
Gaz nodded in understanding. He was low-key jealous. He was BIG jealous. You were Price's kid?? He wanted to be Price's kid.... This was unfair.
He huffed as he walked to your office.
"Hey Gaz, everything alright??" You ask, still working on paperwork.
"Your father has your assessment."
"Oh thanks-" you paused and looked up at him. "What??"
"Your father has your assessment." He said again, somewhat eerily this time. "Make sure to sign your paperwork differently next time." And he slowly backed away to the door.
"Wait, Gaz!" You called after him, scrambling to get up. "don't tell anyone!"
Gaz was slinking our of your office, closing the door just closed enough you could only see his face. "Your father told me everything."
"Kyle Garrick get back here!"
He slammed the door and bolted down the hallway. You opened it again and ran after him. "Gaz!!"
"You won't catch me!"
You chased him around base but ultimately you couldn't catch up to him.
Gaz understands it's a secret and is very professional about it. But sometimes when you're alone he'll sneak by your bedroom door and your office and whisper something that has to do with Price bring your father. It creeps you out so he keeps doing it.
Price thinks it's funny and doesn't get to stop him so long as he tells no one else about what he knows. And Gaz keeps that promise.
Soap 🧼
He's a little slow, give him some time. There are things that have been shoved in his face that are glaringly obvious. Like one time he found you and Price alone in the gym and he was helping you lift, and Price isn't that loving to anyone I'll tell you that.
Encouraging words and everything. He just assumed it was a rough day since all of them needed some encouragement from Price.
Or that time you accidentally signed something as Y/n Price and he looked over it a million times to make sure everything was correct.
It just... It took him a bit is all.
Everyone else knows by this point so it's one day after a long mission and you all come back you hug Price tightly. "You did so amazing kiddo." He praised.
"Thank you dad."
Loud gasp. Very loud, drawn out gasp.
Soap's jaw drops as he looks at you all wide eyed. "did you just call him dad!???"
You all look at Soap a bit confused and the you nod. "Yeah..? I thought you knew?"
"What!? I never knew this!" Soap exclaims.
"Well... I'm adopted, but it's a bit of a secret so-"
"YOURE ADOPTED BY CAPTAIN-"
Ghost slaps his hand over Soap's mouth and glares at him. "Don't tell the whole base will ya?"
Soap looked over at you when Ghost let's go of him and starts to bounce a little. "This is exciting! I didn't know about it."
You couldn't help but chuckle. "Why am I not surprised??"
"Glad we're all in the know now, but it's a secret Soap, so no going around and telling everyone you see, do you understand!?" Price addressed him.
"Me?? Telling secrets- pfft, Price do you even know who you're talking to?? I won't say a word."
Once he learns it is to keep you safe, he will try his hardest not to say anything. Sometimes in meets he's still so stoked he'll just randomly... "woah... Y/n is Price's kid..."
And then you all look at him weirdly. Like, yes Soap, you've known this for six months now.
König 🐙
Didn't think too hard on how this could go at all
König did not know much about you. He didn't know a whole lot considering that was kept under lock and key by the 141.
It was a huge shock. But now that he looks back on it he can kind of see it... Yeah.
"Hey König?" You asked him while the two of you were sitting on a few empty ammo crates in a dusty old compound waiting for your pickup.
"What is it?" He replied, looking at you curiously under the hood.
"Can I tell you a secret?? You can't tell anyone else though, promise?"
He raised an eyebrow, sitting in silence for a moment before nodding. "Deal. What is this secret?"
You sighed. You trusted him a lot, so surely he'd keep this secret to himself right? There wasn't any real harm in telling him.
"My full name is Y/n Price."
König sat on this thought for a moment before he replied. "You're Price's daughter??"
"Adopted."
He hums. "Alright. Thanks for telling me then??"
You shrug. "You're welcome."
König was shocked. He wasn't expected it at all, especially so out of the blue like that. But he was good at hiding it. He was having a mini crisis inside. You were adopted by the Captain John Price!? What was home life like? Probably really fucking good.
You probably got respected a lot. If anyone other than himself knew. And he wouldn't tell anyone. He had to promise himself that. So it was a lot of pressure keeping this secret that you so very well hid.
But he's honored you told him.
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Welcome + Rules
Welcome to the Tumblr Found Family Adoption Agency! Here, we present your blorbos to the masses to have them vote upon whether they should be added to the collective tumblr found family or ditched on the roadside. Submit your blorbos here:
See which blorbos have already joined the found family HERE! To avoid seeing the results posts, mute "ffaa results" The rules are: 1. Play nice; be respectful to others 2. Blorbos can be of any age, since a found family can be just that. So feel free to submit a one-day old infant or a ten thousand year old tree, if those are your blorbos 3. No Harry Potter 4. No real people (might make an exception if it's funny) 5. "No real people" includes no individual tumblr users, youtubers or streamers (this might seem obvious, but there were still a lot of them submitted) 6. No OCs. All your OCs are great and I'd feel sad if they got rejected from the found family F.A.Q. under readmore:
(No one has actually asked any questions, but these are the ones I'm anticipating) Some of these questions have been asked now lol Q. How does this work? A. A post featuring a blorbo shall be made, stating who they are and their source material. A poll will be attached set to one week, asking if we should "adopt" or "ditch" the blorbo. At the end of the week, based on the result, I will announce if they blorbo has been adopted into the tumblr found family or ditched on the roadside Q. What is a found family? A. A found family is a family you find for yourself. It is a term often used in fandom to describe a group of characters who aren't related by blood (although a few members might be) but have come to think of each other as a family through circumstance. Alternatively, they might not be officially recognised as a found family in canon, but wider fanon regards them as such Q. Is this a tournament bracket? A. Nope, blorbos aren't competing against each other, they're only here to be judged by you. We are here enternally submitting blorbos (at least until I run out of steam or pass away lol) Q. I'm not sure if my blorbo counts because of ___ reason? A. If it's not any of the reasons mentioned in the rules, then feel free to send an ask. Or just submit them anyway and I'll decide Q. I submitted a blorbo and they haven't been posted. Did you get them? A. Again, feel free to send an ask. I don't have a regular schedule for posting these. Somedays there'll be batches of polls, others there'll be one or none Q. My blorbos are a duo/trio/etc., who cannot be separated. Can I submit them as a group? A. While I would prefer to stick to individual characters, if you have some who absolutely cannot be separated, I might make exceptions. Most likely, I'll make a poll asking if they should be judged as a group or individually, since there's a lot of media I won't be familiar with Q. My blorbo got ditched on the roadside! Fuck you! A. Friend, as a fan of Theseus from Hades Game, I understand what it's like to have your fave hated by fandom. Anything decided on this blog can never affect your personal headcanons, so go in peace with your middle finger held high Q. What are your icon and header? A. The icon is of the Pokemon Bouffalant and Natu, based on a series of trading card art where Bouffalant finds two Natu and rescues them - the true spirit of found family. The header is a group of characters called the Black Ravens from the Professor Layton series - a group of ragtag working-class kids who make a black market together Q. I wrote some propaganda on the submission form, can you post it or send it back to me? A. Submissions are deleted as the polls are posted, so I can keep track of how many I have left to post, which means I can't do this. Please save your propaganda for the post and not the submissions form Q. Did you know you used fan art on ___ poll? A. Unless I'd mentioned getting permission from the artist, then please assume that I did not know and let me know. I hate art theft and wouldn't want to partake in that, but I'm just not familiar with a good 80% of the series submitted, so sometimes it might slip through the cracks Q. Can I submit a character who isn't my blorbo? A. Also fine! I enjoy it when people submit controversial characters to see how they'll do Q. What happens if there's a tie? A. The blorbo in question becomes an occassional family member who appears with our found family for some important cutscenes, but isn't officially considered part of the found family
Q. No, but seriously, my blorbo got ditched. Do they get another chance? A. At the beginning of each year we host a Redemption Event, where any past blorbos who were submitted get another chance. Because of the high volume of ditched characters, to be included in the event your character will need to be submitted with propaganda via a form that will be released a month before the event Q. I think the image used is a big reason why my blorbo got ditched. Why did you use that image? A. If an image hasn't been submitted, I will just grab one from an image search result in most cases. You know your blorbos best, so if you have a specific (non-fan art) image that you think shows them in their best light, please do submit it when you submit them Q. Did you mean the book version or movie version of that character? A. Whichever version of the blorbo that gets submitted, that'll be the one I use. If no specific version is mentioned, I'll just post that blorbo in general and use whatever image is most common when I look them up, unless an image has been submitted or a book cover has been requested to be used Q. My blorbo is a character played by a youtuber and/or streamer, not the youtuber or streamer themselves, is that okay? A. If it's a character, then it's fine. But please mention this on the submission. Because if I look them up and the result looks to be just some real person, that won't be included Q. What counts as a "sweep"? A. Any character who gets 90% or higher in either adopt or ditch is counted as a sweep. This doesn't give them anything extra, it's just for bragging rights Q. What counts as a "close call"? A. Any character who's poll results are within the 49%-51% range for adopt/ditch is counted as a close call Q. How many characters can I submit at a time? A. There's no hard rule, since the form doesn't track emails, but please be considerate to others and try not to submit more than 10 characters per submission period. See next question for more details Q. How many characters from the same series can I submit at a time? A. Four (4) characters per series per submission period. I'll be lenient for if they've been submitted by multiple people, but from my experience running this blog, it's only the current Hot New Thing that'll be submitted by multiple people and anything else is usually one person submitting one character after another. I used to allow more, but people took this for granted and submitted 50+ from the same series, so now 4 is the cap Q. You missed a tag from that poll! Can it be added? A. Sure! Tags are either provided by the submitter or where left blank, I'll use my best guess. At minimum, you'll get the name of the character and series as they've been submitted. If you know more, let me know and I'll add them to the post during the voting period. Please note: The polls themselves cannot be edited after being posted, only the tags Q. I don't understand what this blog is A. Don't worry about it, friend. Just keep driving and whatever you do, don't wind down the window. We'll be safe soon :)
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zirobitches · 6 months
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One Piece: Soulmate AU
Always in this twilight - Crocodile x GN!Reader
Summary: Soulmates are incapable of hurting each other. As a pirate, this leads to some tragic moments midst battles. You thought you were prepared for when it might happen to you, but damn you were wrong.
Gn! Reader, Angst no comfort, no beta we die like Roger, Reader is Croc's First Mate and a former Roger pirate (Shanks/Buggy's age) but it doesnt really matter, also former slave background, congrats you are now in the place of my self insert OC, no promises on not being cringe this is literally a /reader fic, also had to make a fake crew bc we dont know enough crocs backstory HAND IT OVER ODA
Word count: 4500+
Also first fic on tumblr, idk what im doing here, lmk ur opinions. It is now 2:03am and i have class at 10:30. Might have to skip lmao
EDITS: grammar check lol. also cross posted it on ao3 - same name as my blog
-----------
Soulmates weren't as common as you'd might assume when you first hear about it. There's an easy way to prove someone is your soulmate, but when that method is to harm them, well, it doesn't make it easy to find that person. And society gets a bit weird when you know your soulmate is out there.
you've known that some people carry around little needles to poke into strangers hoping to find the one. But that was in decent society; among pirates you more often heard tales of bullets suddenly dropping to the ground after they hit their target, or swords stopping on someone's skin as though it just hit steel. A battlefield is a hell of a place to meet the person fate had decided for you, but for pirates it had become a norm.
Not that long ago, some genius named Vegapunk did a study on how many people meet their soulmate - 1 in a 100. And that's just how many people find them. It never accounts for how many actually happily end up together. You had chosen to live your life as a pirate, so a happy ending with your supposed soulmate wasn't something you foresaw in your future.
You were always grateful most of your current crew felt the same. There was a small group among pirates that were always on the lookout to find their soulmate and then immediately retire. Your crew however like to joke that if they found them in battle, they would move out of the way so someone else could finish them off. It was a grim reality, but it was your reality.
However, on nights like these where you drank the night away, some romantic always had to bring it up.
"C'mon, did old Roger really make you so cold hearted that you don't believe in true love?"
"Pfft, you're fucking joking right?" You scoffed back. You always argued with Tink about this, but you understood your young navigator still had hope. Too bad you were the pessimist of the crew.
"It's not that I don't believe in true love," you continued. "Soulmates are real, I don't really see another explanation for not being able to harm only one other person in the world. But why limit yourself to waiting for a person you might never meet? So many are denying themselves to fall in love with someone else and then end up dying alone because they never found their soulmate."
Tink pouted in front of you. This was a tired conversation, one that was repeated every few weeks much to the chagrin of your other crewmates. But a controversial topic was always a great topic for a group such as yourselves.
"I'm not denying myself the chance to fall in love! I'm denying ever feeling heartbroken over someone who doesn't matter!" Tink tried to argue back, but you just groaned in response.
"And if you never meet the one? You'll just live and die without ever letting yourself even get a taste of what it is you're chasing." Tink glared, knowing it was futile to keep going, but the pink of her cheeks told you that the grog in her system was trying to get her to keep fighting.
It was then that a familiar tall figure caught your eye. There was your beloved captain Crocodile, trying to sneak behind everyone's back to grab another bottle for himself.
Crocodile was never much one for festivities, at least not one 'undeserved' as he might put it. While there was no battle won to celebrate, the night sky was clear and the waters calm; in the Grand Line, shouldn't that be enough to be happy about?
However tonight you weren't going to let him sneak booze and hide from the crew.
"Cap'n!" Apparently the grog was getting to you as well. "Come over here and help me crush Tink's dream of a soulmate!" You laughed as Tink gasped at your audacity. The rest of your company seemed more or less happy with how the night was going, but your captain was still less than enthused to join.
"If this is the same soulmate debate you've been going on about for the past 3 years, I will pass again. You already know my feelings on the matter." Crocodile's deep voice reverberated across the deck of the ship. Even if he wasn't giving orders, he still commanded the attention of everyone within earshot.
He gave a long drag of the bottle in his hand, and then turned to walk away. However you felt it was your duty as first mate to pester your captain into spending casual time with his crew.
"I may know your opinion, but would you be so kind and gracious to remind the rest of the crew? Perhaps?" You called out to the dark coat trying to run from the party, and saw him pause, then turn to walk back.
You could see some of the newer additions to the crew cower. You didn't blame them, Crocodile was an imposing figure, and was developing a infamous reputation as a pirate on the Grand Line. But he was your captain, and he would never hurt his crew, this you knew.
"If I ever met my soulmate," Crocodile began, "I assume it would be when I attempt to kill them." He took another sip from his bottle. This was one of the rare moments he was not puffing a cigar you suddenly realize. It made his face look younger, as though he was actually a man in his 20s as he claimed he was.
As though he knew you were thinking of him, Crocodile made eye contact with you. "When I realize I can't kill them, I'll call out for you." You felt your heart skip a beat. "Then you can finish them for me."
It was purely the grog's fault for making your face warm. The lack of a sea breeze was also suddenly apparent. But you couldn't be flustered, not when you were the one who asked for this answer.
You smiled, doing your best to brush off the tension. You were still maintaining eye contact with him after all. "Well there you have it. Not exactly the opinion I remember, but I hope I can live up to your expectations, Cap'n."
Crocodile nodded, then told you all to start to sober up or get to bed. "I don't need a crew of drunks on the Grand Line, or else we will never make it to the New World."
Your crew began to disperse and you went below deck to your cabin. You really hadn't had much to drink that night, yet your chest felt tight.
You thought you had learned your lesson, but no. Even after promising yourself you wouldn't, you became attached to your crew. Even after your last one fell apart. Even after you watched your first captain, your savior, be executed, you fucked up and dove straight into a different crew expecting it to be different.
You laid down in your bed, staring at the ceiling, the world slightly spinning. Suddenly all you can think about is when you met Croc.
-
It was little more than 3 years ago now, wasn't it? A whole 3 years since Roger died. The weight is still heavy in your chest, but not nearly as devastating as it was in Logue Town that day. You were a wreck, physically and emotionally.
After watching the execution, you were too heartbroken to join the others in pursuit of the One Piece. Your world has just officially ended, the crew was technically already disbanded, but now there was no hope of getting it back.
You ended up in some local bar. No one recognized you, and in the haze of all the excitement following Roger's death, why would they? You had just been some nobody apprentice who happened to stick on his ship after Roger saved your life.
But your sorrow did catch someone's eye.
You sat at the counter of this dive bar in Logue Town, mindlessly stirring whatever number drink sat in front of you now. You had run out of tears, and sat stuck in some frozen state of grief.
However, this sad portrait of yourself did not seem to deter someone from sitting next to you.
You paid them no mind, just staring into empty space, not enough energy to even remember you were still alive.
"You were a member of the Pirate King's crew weren't you?"
A deep voice rattled from the stranger, but it was his words that really caught your attention.
"How'd you figure?" You had paused your stirring at first, but now focused on your drink to avoid eye contact. You were a mess, you could feel your puffy eyes, and were still sniffling every so often.
"There's no reason anyone in this town should be sad that someone like him died. So, you must have known him, right?" The deep voice continued, and you could feel their eyes staring, but didn't have the strength to meet them.
"Well, you caught me. Going to take me in and see if you can get a reward? I'm afraid you won't find any posters of me though. I tended to get lost in the crowd, you could say." After that statement you finally grasped the glass in front of you and decided to knock back what was left. If this was the end of your little pirating career, so be it. It can die with Roger.
"Will you join my crew?"
Your head snapped up at that, and you finally looked up at the stranger.
Long black hair was slicked back to show all the sharp features of the man's face. A strong square jaw, a prominent, perfect nose, and pale, piercing eyes, hooded by thin black eyebrows. Undoubtedly, even in your drunken haze, you were sure sober you would agree the man was handsome.
After a moment to take in this stranger all you could manage was a "Excuse me?"
He smiled - no, smirked - and pulled a cigar out from his coat. "I could use someone with your experience on my crew." He carried on, as if you were discussing the weather outside. He lit the cigar with a lighter you hadn't noticed him pull out. Perhaps it was the booze, but looking at this guy, he almost seemed… fuzzy, around the edges.
"Having someone who once worked for the Pirate King should help me become the next Pirate King."
The stranger took a long drag from his cigar, then exhaled over the counter. You didn't know where the barkeep was now, but at the moment, it felt like you and him were the only people in the building.
You should be mad. Enraged at the audacity of someone to come up to you on the worst day of your life, and to ask you to work for them. But you felt nothing.
No. That wasn't right. You did feel something.
You chuckled. Giggled even. A small laugh that built up till you were laughing, nearly hysterically. You hadn't felt like this sort of light headed elation in a long time, and it was nice.
After taking a moment to catch your breath you finally looked back at the stranger. He didn't look upset at your reaction. He just kept smoking his cigar, waiting for an answer.
"I'm afraid I didn't catch your name."
"I am Sir Crocodile, captain of the Neverland Pirates."
"Hmmm. Well, Sir Crocodile, I can tell you now that you have no chance of being Pirate King." You smirked back at him, propping your head up on your hand as you leaned against the counter.
This response still didn't bother the man. If anything, you swore he almost seemed… satisfied by your answer. Perhaps he knows what's coming next.
"I can help you out on the Grand Line and maybe help you get to the New World, but I promise," you leaned in towards this captain, staring him down. "You will never be the man Roger was. No one will."
Yet Crocodile was unperturbed.
"So you'll join my crew?"
You leaned back and reassessed your empty glass. You cast a quick glance at the bar and then back at the other pirate.
"Sure. I don't have anything better to do anyways."
-
You thought back in Logue Town you could never feel the same way about Crocodile's crew that you felt with Roger's, but you were always the fool. Now you are attached.
Now you need a reason to leave.
You couldn't waste your time or your heart with them. You had already died once with Roger, and if you stayed any longer you know you could never leave alive. You got up from bed - still plenty tipsy you swayed over - to your dresser.
Middle drawer, back left, underneath some no longer worn t-shirts was a small box. You opened it.
There were several small scraps of paper. Vivre cards.
As a child on Roger's boat, you were ecstatic to learn about vivre cards. A simple way to know the people you loved were alive and safe, and be able to find their exact location? It was too good to be true.
When you remember the feeling of Roger's paper burning in your hands at his execution, you knew the reality of vivre cards.
Your fingertips gently sorted through the papers you had made for some of Roger's crew. Each had a tiny name written in a corner. Shanks, Buggy, Ray, Gaban, Oden, and a few others of people who had been most important to you.
Maybe you could leave this crew and seek out the others. Rayleigh had always said he would retire at Sabaody, and your crew was bound to get there soon, hopefully in a couple months. The ache in your chest; you missed your old family. This could be the excuse you needed.
With a heavy sigh you closed the box and hid it away again. Sleeping on it would be good. Sleeping away the booze would also be nice.
Maybe then the tears would stop silently slipping down your face.
-
It turns out the excuse of seeing your old crew was unneeded. The news coo was kind enough to drop a reason to leave directly in your lap.
You stared at the newspaper for a long moment. The sinking feeling in your gut still did not go away.
You walked up to the bow where Crocodile was standing. He stared at the horizon as you approached the next island, Water 7.
"Captain."
Crocodile turned to look at you, face neutral, signature cigar in his mouth.
"Morning. The news any good?"
"They want to make you a Warlord."
Your own feelings were swept under the rug as your crewmates overheard. Instantly the deck was buzzing, the news spreading and making the once sleepy, slightly hungover crew come back to life.
"This is perfect!" The helmsman Diat yelled, a grin wide on his face. "Not only do we get the Marines off our back, it's recognition that we are some of the strongest pirates on the Grand Line!"
You would have laughed at him if not for the ice in your chest. Similar celebratory remarks were made all around you, but you didn't have the strength to pretend this was good news to you.
All you could feel was an icy feeling on your back, right where you had a large scar that tore up a long faded tattoo. But time could not get rid of the mark you could never forget about, no matter how much you wanted to.
Amid the spontaneous party you finally turned back to Crocodile. Amidst it all, he was still only looking at you.
Your words were quiet compared to the raucous around you, but your captain heard you just fine.
"If you become a Warlord I'm leaving the crew."
A couple of nearby crew gasped, heads whipped in your direction and murmurs quickly took place of all the yells.
Instantly protests, people yelling your name, yelling their arguments, but it all fell on deaf ears as you stared down your captain.
Tink of all people knew it was futile to argue with you, and turned to the man of the hour. "Captain! You can't just let your first mate leave!"
Before she could continue, Crocodile interjected. "You never planned on making me King of the Pirates, right? So you never planned on staying on this ship anyways."
This evoked even more protests from the crowd. Many of them weren't sure what you two were talking about, and some had begun to yell again.
The sounds were starting to be overwhelming, and this was not a conversation that required the whole crew anyways.
"That's enough from everyone!" You yelled over the cacophony. The crew went quiet. "This is a conversation for me and the captain, the rest of you need to beat it! Do something useful, we will make a port soon."
The crowd was not placated in the least, but it was true the ship would be docked soon, and there were things that needed to be prepared beforehand.
"You heard them. Get back to work." Crocodile finished your command, and the crowd dispersed. You knew they would still be listening, but it didn't stop you.
"I refuse to be part of a crew that works alongside the Marines. If you become a Warlord you automatically become their dog - then you may as well be a dog of the celestial dragons." Your tongue burned even at the mention of the world nobles.
Crocodile took a long drag of his cigar. He looked away from you and sighed an exhale of smoke, then dragged his line of sight back to you.
"I haven't decided yet."
You bristled at this. "Are you suggesting they already offered this to you? And I had to find out through a newspaper?"
Crocodile took yet another drag, and you lost your patience with his nicotine addiction. "Answer me Crocodile."
Your captain sighed through his nose this time, some of the smoke reaching you, a familiar smell after all these years. It once may have been a nice fragrance, knowing your captain was near, but now it blinded you and stoked your anger.
"We are almost to Water 7. Let's save it for there."
-
Tensions were high, especially between you and Crocodile, when your mood worsened when he disappeared while you oversaw the docking. But you docked. You got the crew into a hotel. During this time the crew began splitting into sides, which was not something you had anticipated. But you ignored it all until finally, Crocodile returned and you cornered him into in a room alone with you.
He had no cigar, and you had no drink in hand. It was a painfully sober room.
Crocodile sighed and slumped into an armchair. He dragged his eyes across the room till they met yours. You refused to look away this time, jaw set with determination to stand your ground.
"I don't want to be the Marine's dog," Croc began. "But they offered me a deal."
"The deal that our crimes are excused? Big whoop, as long as we don't get caught it's almost the same."
"No," he sighed, a large ring covered hand dragging down his face in exasperation. "A deal to help take down Whitebeard."
That got you silent. For a moment, as you recalled every time you saw Roger and Whitebeard exchange blows and fight for days on end.
"You? Take down Whitebeard?" You laughed, but it was a dry and bitter thing. "Your bounty is $81 million berries. Your devil fruit is great and all, but it is by no means fight and beat Whitebeard good. Even if Newgate was without his crew, our entire crew would be wiped off the map. You've lost it if you truly believe that this is achieveable."
Crocodile glared from across the room. Not his usual, perpetual glare, but a genuine, freeze you in your tracks ice cold glare.
He stood up, all 8 feet imposing over you as he stalked across the room. "I have let you say plenty of cruel things to me, but this may cross the line."
But you were his first mate and you couldn't fear him if you were supposed to talk sense into him. "Cross the line? I'm not the one who is making deals with the Navy so I can sail us to our deaths at the hands of Whitebeard!" You were yelling now, no, roaring at your foolish headstrong captain.
"If you take that ship and that crew as it is now to the New World to fight Whitebeard and his sons, no one will come back alive!" Your heart was on fire with rage and frozen in fear. Rage at your captain, who is very much overestimating his abilities. Fear for your crewmates who have no idea what sort of danger their captain was going to put them in.
Crocodile was now truly enraged on the same level as you. He sneered down at you as he suddenly grabbed you by the neck - much to your shock. "I wanted you there to see me become the next Pirate King. But if you can't support me for this, one of the biggest moments in my life since I've been a pirate, then I have no need for you anymore."
With his free hand he opened the door that was behind you. A group of Marines walked in with cuffs ready. "To sweeten the deal, what better than to give a former Roger pirate to the Navy?"
You felt all the blood drain from your face, as fear for your own well being finally pierced your heart. You looked up at Crocodile, and you could feel tears begin to creep at the corner of your eyes. "You never fail to surprise me, Captain."
"Well done Sir Crocodile." One of the Marines spoke, and you could tell from their uniform it was a Vice Admiral, though you didn't recognize them.
"A public execution of a Roger's pirate should be a grand way to ring in your instatement as Warlord."
You felt the world slow down around you and felt Crocodile's grip on your neck slip at the Marine's sentencing.
Crocodile began to speak, "That was not what we agreed on," But your ears had begun to ring.
Growing up on the Oro Jackson, you had picked up some neat tricks. You found out you were hopeless with the color of observation haki, but had a special knack for color of arms. Perfect against those darn logia fruit users.
In a blink of an eye you ripped Crocodile's arm away from your neck and you made a mad dash past him. And jumped straight through a window, glass and all.
You could vaguely hear a commotion behind you as Marines ran after you, but it was lost with the ringing in your ears.
You could hear and feel your heartbeat, pounding throughout your body as you ran through the endless alleys and canals of Water 7. You could feel tears pierce through the wind rushing past your face as you ran, desperately with no objective.
All you could think about was the way the heat of Crocodile's hand felt on your neck, the cold metal of the rings that had pressed against your pulse.
Have you ever really touched Crocodile before?
You missed him. You didn't understand why. He had just betrayed you - fucking hell, he was just handing you over to the Navy as part of his deal to become a warlord, but god. You wanted to be with him anyways. You're not sure how long you've been in love with him; his sharp eyes, the smell of his cigars, the rings on his hands, but gods above.
You had fallen in love with Crocodile.
In your realization you slowed down. Your legs and lungs burned, you were gasping for air and not just because you had been running.
Has it always been this dark? When did the day leave you behind?
You now stood in some nondescript alley, dimly lit a golden hue by windows that lined it. It was a long alley, each end blocked by canals. How you arrived there you weren't certain. But you weren't alone.
At one end sand had appeared. And from it stepped your dear, awful captain Crocodile. You both stared at each other, both of you panting for breath.
"I didn't want it to be like this." Crocodile's voice cuts through the air to you. You knew you should run. But for some reason you couldn't find the strength.
"I didn't know they would execute you. I imagined they would send you to Impel Down." Crocodile continued to speak. You just stood there and listened as he walked towards you.
As you watched him, there was a strange look on his face. You've seen it before but still didn't know what it meant.
He stopped walking ten feet in front of you. The light was still too dim to see him clearly, but it was fine. You knew his face well enough.
"I won't let the Navy kill you. Not after what the nobles did to you, it feels wrong." You had never told Crocodile what the scar on your back was. It didn't feel like it mattered anymore.
"I think I'll feel better about this if I'm the one who kills you."
You knew this was coming. The second you saw him at the end of the alley. But you agreed with him. If you had to die at someone's hands, you would pick Crocodile over anyone else. Even if it meant he didn't feel the same about you, it didn't matter anymore. You were so tired.
It would be nice to see Roger again.
But then Rayleigh's face flashed in your mind. You still had to pay him a visit. You still had to visit Wano to see Oden. You wanted to see Shanks and Buggy find the One Piece.
You couldn't see Roger just yet.
So, in a sudden scramble, you turned around and ran.
The ground where you had been standing suddenly crumbled. You felt a gasp finally escape your lungs as you realized you almost gave up. But not yet. You had to save your crew too.
Then you finally ran out of luck. The dim light hid a hole in the cobblestones and you fell to the alley ground. You quickly twisted your body just in time to see Crocodile's scythe of sand arc straight towards you.
It hits you right in the chest, and crumbles to dust.
Confused, you run your hands through the sand that has landed on your lap. You're not cut in half - instead you just have sand all over you.
Crocodile change his mind? He was letting you go? Thoughts and heart still racing, you looked up at him.
Oh.
Oh no.
The horror on his face was plain to see - that was supposed to be a killing blow.
But he didn't hurt you.
Your hand jumped to your neck from when he grabbed you earlier. But in retrospect, you had just been shocked by the action, he hadn't harmed you.
Crocodile didn't hurt you.
No.
Crocodile couldn't hurt you.
Because he was your soulmate.
It was the look on his face that hurt you the most. The disgust, anger, horror - this man did not want a soulmate. He did not want you. So why bother sticking around?
You scrambled back to your feet. Even if he couldn't hurt you, the Marines still could.
So, with blurry eyes and a heavy heart, you ran away.
Faintly, you heard a painfully familiar voice call your name, but then all that was left was the wind as you ran.
pt. 2 (if you want, but this might be better as a one shot)
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concreteburialplot · 1 month
Text
Cool About It // 01
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01 - Breaking & Entering
pairing: noah sebastian x fem!oc
masterlist: here | crossposted: ao3 | word count: 6.3k
summary; Noah runs into an old friend while visiting his hometown for the holidays. Noah convinces Amelia to meet him on the playground they grew up on to catch up. Reminiscing leads them to a midnight adventure that reminds them all too much of the past.
warnings; alcohol consumption, breaking & entering? stealing? kinda?, hallmark-y, nostalgic, talks of family trauma, cops (acab!), vaguely sad & distraught Noah, uses 'Sebastian' as his last name, 18+ MDNI
disclaimer; welcome to my new short series! reminder that this is hallmark-y bc i began writing it in December lol i decided to challenge myself w this fic in multiple ways, one of the biggest ones was writing it in 3rd person vs my comfy world of 1st or 2nd person. I’ve never written in 3rd person so, if it’s not my best, i apologize, i’m sure it will improve lol
a/n: this is au and follows no actual timelines/events, and uses oc's for family members.
don't like it don't read it. don’t be mean for no reason & let others enjoy things thnx :)
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It had been quite a busy morning, and Amelia was slowly making her way through the longest line she’d had in a while. She finished heating up a cinnamon roll and snapped a lid on what felt like the 75th peppermint mocha she’d made that day.
“Thanks.” Mumbled the distracted patron and stepped off to the side to grab extra napkins.
“Next.” She said while shuffling dollar bills into the clangy register, then looked up motioning to the last customer. Her hazel eyes landed on a man covered in tattoos pre-occupied on his phone. “Next!” Her call was louder than before and this time edged with impatient annoyance.
A familiar pair of dark brown eyes snapped up at her, his gaze more startled than angry.
Amelia’s brows furrowed together and as if on cue, the register dinged closed in time with her realization.
She’d recognize those eyes anywhere.
“Noah?”
The soft velvet of her voice yanked each edge of Noah’s mouth into a wide toothy smile. “Scout?” He asked in the same caught-off-guard tone. His voice was much deeper than she remembered, and he seemed taller, if that was even possible.
She chuckled at the fact that he used his old nickname for her and felt a tinge of warmth bloom on her cheeks. The ends of her pink lips curled up into an adorably genuine smile. “What are you doing here?” She pressed her palms flat against the cold counter leaning forward and letting soft chocolate curls spill over her shoulder.
“Oh, uh, I’m here with Nicholas.” He thumbed over his shoulder towards the town. “He’s here visiting his family, I just tagged along.”
Tagged along.
She should’ve known, of course Noah would be down here with Nick’s family for Christmas. Where else would he be?
“Oh,” She smiled tenderly at his words and nodded. “Of course.”
Every now and then she’d run into Nicholas whenever he came back to town or ran into his parents while out and about, but it was never anything of significance. Whenever it was Nicholas, she wanted more than anything to inquire about Noah or the band but always kept the interactions short, sweet and reserved. The last thing she wanted was to come off as wanting to “catch up” after they gained a larger audience for clout.
He grinned back at her and there was a quiet moment shared between them, as if they both didn’t know what to say. The feeling in the air swung from having nothing to say to having so many words that it was overwhelming to speak.
The gentle moment was broken by the bell dinging above the door as a new customer walked in.
Her first impulse was to make his usual but stopped herself. “Oh um, whatcha want?” She asked, realizing that his tastes had probably changed since he was 16.
“Just a vanilla cold brew is fine, thank you.” He said with a tight-lipped smile, feeling awkward that she was serving him.
She went ahead and filled his cup with the dark amber liquid. “Do you want a snickerdoodle cookie? They’re freshly baked.”
He nods enthusiastically, “Yes please, they’re my favorite.”
She remembered.
Of course, she did.
How could one forget staying up til 2 am at Nick’s house baking cookies and having Top Chef-level trials trying to achieve the perfect spice mixture for what Noah called, “The Most Snick-of-Doodles that could ever Doodle.”
“You got it.” She smiled placing some pastries into a brown paper bag before handing it to him. “I threw in a cinnamon roll for Nicholas, I made sure to give him the one with the most icing.”
“Oh, he’ll love that.” He chuckled gently taking the bag along with his drink. “We should um, catch up soon?”
“Sure.” She pressed her lips together to keep her grin from growing too wide.
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Cold fallen leaves crunched beneath Amelia’s feet as she navigated through a park that she hadn’t stepped foot on in a good ten years. A cool chill made her tug her thick knit cardigan tight around her thin frame.
“Noah?” She delicately whisper-yelled into the darkness, the meet-up destination barely lit by the full ivory moon. She should’ve known that Noah wouldn’t be content with catching up at a restaurant or at her house or anywhere normal.
“Scout!” He replied from the swings a bit to her left. A chuckle left his lips, and he quickly clicked the flashlight on his phone, waving it in the air like a search light.
A deep shade of embarrassment coated her pale cheeks, “There’s no streetlights over here!” She walked over and lightly smacked his arm. “It’s dangerous you know.” The weight of her body creaked the metal frame when she fell into the blue swing seat.
“Or you’re just getting old and need glasses.” He teased with a slight slur riding the end of his words.
“Ha-ha, very funny.” She responded with a playful glare.
She looked over at him thinking how funny it was seeing him so large and full grown in such a tiny, low swing. It looked extremely disproportionate and goofy, like a Great Dane in a shopping cart.
He handed her a bottle of cheap red wine, half drank already.
“Oh, got started without me huh?” She sassed before stealing the bottle from his fingers. “Couldn’t have done beer?” She tips the glass bottle until bitter, dry alcohol infiltrates every tastebud, reminding her why she’d switched to martinis or seltzers in her later years.
He waved her off with a tsk, “Too much hassle. Wine was easier. And you took fuckin’ forever!”
“Right.” She rolled her eyes playfully, it wasn’t like she was all that upset over the wine over beer, just that he drank so much of it already. She pressed the mouth of the bottle to her lips once more taking another hefty swig and handed it back to him. “Where’s Nick?”
“Ah,” He swiped the bottle back and took a long gulp. “You know, family stuff.” He wiped the back of hand across his mouth. “I can only handle – so much of it.” His hands motion off his words. “They mean well I just… can’t do too much of it at once.”
Growing up with parents that were as dismissive and absent, then gone all at once like his, knowing how to “family” was odd and foreign to him. As Noah got older, he began to realize that basic family etiquette was a trait he fundamentally lacked, as if he played hooky on some Family 101 course in his formative years. It wasn’t something he inherently prioritized and, at least when he was younger, it would irritate him when friends or colleagues put family above things that he deemed more important, like band related obligations. He never had to deal with family of his own, put it on his schedule or allot energy for it. He simply didn’t understand it.
Sure, he came off as rude at times, leaving friend’s family events early or mentally checking out mid-day. It wasn’t his fault that it was exhausting and overstimulating for him. To him it seemed natural, as if everyone felt that way, something akin to the universal experience of trying to escape school or work. It never crossed his mind that people might actually enjoy their families, nor could he comprehend the necessity for it.
It depended on who, what and when but for the most part it was exhausting to him. Some groups were better than others, like Nick’s family. Over the years they’d housed him for weeks at a time, months even sometimes. As far as Noah was concerned, the Ruffilo’s were his family. He always came and went as he pleased, always an open-door policy to the Ruffilo refuge. But that didn’t exclude Nick’s family from his unintended ignorance and tendency to run. He just could only take so much at once. Lucky for him, they never seemed to mind his behavior much. They never batted an eye; they understood him for who he was and why. Their house was one of the only places he felt comfortable, one of the only places he ever called home.
“I know.” She nodded, wrapping her hands around the thick swing chains. “I remember.”
“Right.” He replies solemnly, taking another sip before swapping it back.
Vivid memories filled Amelia’s brain of 14-year-old Noah tapping on her window like a freshly escaped felon looking for asylum. The heavy, panicked breathing and glassy eyes never matched the mischievous grin plastered across his face. Holidays were the worst; she recalls keeping her window unlocked during the winter months, so he’d always have an alternative escape. The Ruffilo’s were a festive bunch that took any excuse to celebrate. Naturally, Nicholas also only possessed so much adolescent tolerance to endure so many familial festivities so, he too would sneak away with Noah at times but, for the most part it was just him and Amelia celebrating holidays together on her bedroom floor.  
The air was still between them while she took a couple sips of sanguine liquid trying to catch up to him.
“So, you’re a big ol’ rockstar now huh?” The girl smiled, nudging him with her elbow trying to lighten the mood. Even though the words are positive and light, they tasted so sad on her tongue.
He laughed, something she hadn’t heard in what felt like a lifetime. She nearly forgot what it sounded like, but it hadn’t changed really, just a little deeper now. His now tattooed hands grasped both metal swing chains and leaned back a little, using the tension to suspend his body while he observed the stars above them. “Not big. Just opening for some real bands now. Finally able to headline our own little tour soon. Fuckin’ took long enough.” He dismissed the compliment immediately, snuffing it into the ground like a shriveled-up cigarette butt.
She couldn’t help but roll her eyes at his response. He might’ve not seen it as notable accomplishments, but she knew better than to place the validity of success in the hands of someone riddled with imposter syndrome.
“Well, for what it’s worth, I think it’s pretty fucking cool.” She leaned against the chain closest to the long-haired boy.
His lips pulled to a smile while his eyes stayed focused on the sky. “Thanks.”
She followed his gaze and chuckled, “Sky’s pretty interesting huh?” She teased.
“It is when you barely get to see stars. I never really get to see them in LA. Sometimes I forget they’re even up there.” He replied sadly before sitting back up.
Amelia took another sip of the almost empty bottle, starting to feel the warmth of alcohol spread through her body. Something about the stars and Noah made a memory cross her mind that made her burst out into a cackle. “Do you remember when you put SO much work into your astronomy project for the science fair and fucking Nicholas won with his fucking-”
“Moldy bread!” They said loudly in unison before erupting into booming laughter.
“God I was so pissed.” Noah shook his head, “And then I had to eat his fucking moldy bread.”
“Oh yeah because you lost the bet! I forgot all about that!” Laughter filled her ribcage in a way it hadn’t in years, and it felt really fucking good.
“I was so fucking sure I’d win! I should’ve known, Nick has always been the golden boy. Teacher’s-pet swindling ass.” He kicked the sand just as he would’ve at 8 years old. It’s funny how people’s mannerisms don’t really change all that much as they age. Being there with him on their old playground felt like being in a time machine. “Worst food poisoning I ever had.”
“Didn’t you borrow the telescope you used from Nick too?” She questioned, wondering if she just made that part up in her head.
“Yeah, yeah I think I did actually.” His brows furrowed as he dug through his memories. “You know what? It’s probably still in their garage!”
“Really? Maybe you can find it tomorrow.” She poured the rest of the wine into her mouth, savoring the cheap bitterness of it pooling on her tongue.
“But the stars are so pretty tonight!” He whined in classic Noah fashion.
“Yeah so? What are you gonna do? Break into their garage?” She chuckled jokingly.
He straightened up and looked over at her with wide eyes like a lightbulb just lit above his head - a look she remembered all too well.
“No.” She warned, just like she would’ve back then at whatever scheme Noah concocted in his devious little brain.
He gave her a familiar mischievous toothy grin before pushing harshly off the swing.
“No, no, no.” She sighed as he already left his seat swinging and made his way towards the street.
“Noah!” She called after him. When he showed no sign of stopping, she let out a long sigh, questioning how she ended up having to stop a 6’4 man from breaking into houses in the middle of the night. She pushed off the swing, leaving it clanging and swaying behind her.
“Noah I’m not br-“ Her yell dulled down to a hush when she caught up to him. “I’m not breaking into the Ruffilo house at midnight!” Her words were stern but to Noah they just sounded like a child’s warning against curse words.
“We’re not breaking in ‘melia.” He didn’t match her whisper, his voice was loud and proud for anyone in the night to hear. “I remember the garage code.” He announced with drunken pride.
She scoffed, “And what if someone hears the garage, Noah? Then what?”
He shrugged, “Nick is staying there, we’ll just say we were trying to see him or something. You know I have free reign there anyway.”
“This is a really shitty plan, Noah.” She crossed her arms over her chest with a displeased frown.
“It’s a great plan.” He stated confidently, walking in long strides that she could barely keep up with. “You know all my plans are great.”
“Hmm.” She hummed skeptically. “Statistically, I don’t think that’s true.”
Walking down the street with Noah to Nick’s family home in the dead of the night felt so… familiar, as if she was walking in the same exact footsteps as 15-year-old Amelia had, like her memories were tangible in her hands again. She tightened her fists slightly to remind herself that the past was not solid in her hands again. She wasn’t 15 again on some spontaneous, teenage adventure – but the alcohol-fueled adrenaline prickling at her fingertips begged to differ.
Even past midnight, the small neighborhood’s Christmas lights shined bright. Normally, she’d find them obnoxious, but tonight they seemed much sweeter, only adding to the nostalgia.
“Oh no? All of my plans worked out one way or another.” He defended as if it was factual with a straightened back and pointed finger. “All but one.”
Her brows knitted tightly together at his words, because in her memory, there was a good chunk of her life spent stuck in detention because of his schemes.
“And which one would that be?” She sassed back, watching as his speed picked up even more after her question.
“Not important.” He waved the brunette off, “C’mon, we’re here.”
Unexpectedly, his hand slips around her wrist, and it wraps tingly electricity up her arm then across her entire body. All at once the butterflies that used to be so perpetually embedded in her stomach returned in a rampant flurry. Her gaze slowly snapped up to meet his face. His smile hadn’t changed in the near 10 years apart and neither did the bright glint in his espresso eyes. Time seemed to slow around them for that split second where the electricity sizzled beneath both their fingertips and their eyes found each other’s just as easily as they used to. In that brief moment she could’ve sworn she was looking into the eyes of rail thin, tattooless teenage Noah.
“I know they got a Ring doorbell, so we gotta hide between the cars.” He whispered and ducked them both down as he weaved her through the vehicles in the driveway.
“I can’t fucking believe you talked me into this Noah!” She whisper-yelled at him, wanting nothing more than to properly reprimand him.
“Sh!”
They finally found themselves in front of the garage keypad conveniently out of view of the doorbell camera. Noah blinked blankly at plastic number pad without moving. His inked fingers tapped on his own crossed arm while his tongue stayed lodged between his lips in thought.
“Well? Go ahead! Get it over with.” She insisted, motioning urgently to the garage wanting it to be over as fast as possible. She tucked her hands across her body and into her sides giving her some semblance of comfort. The last thing she wanted was for their childish midnight antics to wake up the entire house.
“Hey! Give me time.” He rushed back, lifting a finger in her direction to shush her.
“Time? I thought you said you remembered it!”
“I do! …I think… if they haven’t changed it.” His tone much less confident than before.
“Noah!”
“Hush!” He pressed a finger to his lips at her and took a hesitant step towards the keypad. With a couple semi-sure clicks, the garage door slid open slowly. Amelia exhaled in relief at how the metal clangs of the garage were much quieter than she remembered. Still though, they creaked too loud for her liking, feeling embarrassment and anxiety flood her body.
“Yes!” Noah squeezed his fists up in victory. “See, told you I remembered.”
“Lucky guess.” She rolled her eyes with a smile.
Her eyes widened as the garage door unveiled a gorgeous white car. It was by no means a luxury car, not a Lexus or anything of the sort, but a high enough model to make you look twice. “Damn Mama Ruffilo, ridin’ in style now.”
Noah grinned as he scoots around the car. His smile was reserved, like she had discovered some award he was keeping hidden out of modesty. “Yeah, that’s the one we got her for Mother’s Day.”
“We?” She questioned, her head cocking to the side a bit.
“Yeah, Nick and me. We each paid half.”
“Oh wow, that’s really nice of you.” She replied softly. It didn’t take a genius to calculate just how much it would cost two broke DIY touring bandmates to pay for a new car, even in halves. The vehicle was shiny and spotless, evidently well taken care of – the type of care you’d put into a possession you never thought you’d own, the type of care that came from deep gratitude.
“It’s the least I could do for ya know… everything she’s done for me.”
Amelia nodded knowing exactly what he meant. It was no secret that he was more than a family friend to them, but it was nice to see that he recognized it too. While Noah might not have attended every family event or stayed for long, he showed his love and appreciation in his own small ways. Gifts were one of his favorite ways of doing so. Yeah, Noah might’ve only stayed at a Thanksgiving for an hour or two for food, but he was there long enough to make mental notes for next year, to bring extra cranberry sauce because Nick’s abuela loves it or extra croutons since Nick’s mom tends to snack on them while she cooks. He paid attention and he loved deeply, even if it didn’t seem that way on the surface.
He rustled around some miscellaneous garage junk in the corner, making more noise than Amelia felt comfortable with. She stood up on her tip toes to watch carefully him over the pristine car with her heart beating in her chest begging to rush him again.
“Ah! I knew it’d be here!” He said a little too loud out of excitement and promptly covered his mouth. His wide brown eyes met hers in a silent ‘oops, shit, sorry!’ plea.
In desperate need to escape the anxiety inducing mission, Amelia ran to the end of the driveway the second she saw the telescope in Noah’s hand. It took him longer than it should’ve just to snatch the item, but she didn’t question it or investigate much when he sped right past her after the garage began squeaking closed.
They made it out in record time, holding in their laughter until they reached the end of the street. It only took one look at each other to send them into a cackling fit. Amelia’s delicate hands found his thin arm and used him for stability, while the laughter shook her entire frame.
When they make it back to the park, he set down the telescope and unravels something she somehow didn’t notice he was carrying before.
“Did you steal that from their garage?!”
He grinned and proudly pulled another bottle of wine, white this time, from the blanket he also borrowed. “Yeah? And I’ll just replace them when I bring the telescope back tomorrow.” He carefully sat the wine down at her feet and spread out the buffalo-print blanket over the grass.
“You are so bad!” She chuckled, smacking him playfully with the excess of her long cardigan sleeve.
“Isn’t that what girls want? A bad boy?” He smirked jokingly, getting down on his knees to angle the telescope just right so that they didn’t need to stand up to use it.
She pressed her lips together as she watched him. Sure, that’s what some girls want, but not her. Even when he was landing them in detention every other day and keeping them out way past curfew – even when everyone else considered him a “bad boy” – she knew he wasn’t, not really.
Even now, whenever he got on stage, covered in ink, growling like a demon – she knew he wasn’t, and has never been, “bad”. Not the way she knew him. Amelia had a talent for seeing through people and she always saw right through Noah, from the first time she ever saw him in the back of her 3rd grade class. And all through adolescence, she saw him clearly through all his stormy confliction and thick brick walls.
Noah never saw it of course; how could he believe that someone as sugary sweet as Amelia could possibly ever see him as anything more than comical the social mask he wore with friends. In fact, he would even go as far to believe his mask was thickest and most opaque around her. Whether or not that was factual, didn’t lessen her ability to see him, really see him.
Being told you’re so wrong for so long, makes you believe that no one could ever see you as right. No matter how many friends Noah had at his parties, or fans in his crowds or girls in his bed, he never felt as though anyone saw him as enough. He got so exhausted from constantly trying to outdo himself that sometimes he forgot what exactly he was trying to accomplish.
Amelia never once believed the “bad influence, bad boy” propaganda their parents or teachers ever accused him of. To her, he was just Noah; the weird emo kid in the back of her classes, the neighbor down the street, the other older “brother” of the youngest girl scout in her troop. Amelia knew Noah at his core.
“Ah, bad boys are overrated.” She waved off his words casually.
He turned and gave her an unconvinced look, “Yeah, sure.” he glared playfully before sitting back on his legs. “Well, it’s ready if you wanna look.”
Amelia crawled across the blanket to meet him and peered through the telescope. Billions of tiny stars flooded the glass lens with twinkles and glimmers you’d never be able to see normally. Fluffy white clouds interrupted the view every so often, but it didn’t take away from the breathtaking scene.
“Whoa.” She mouthed quietly, just taking in the sight. “It’s so beautiful.”
“Sure is.” Noah agreed quietly, bringing his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them while he watched her.
They took some turns looking out of the telescope and passing the wine bottle back and forth before finally resting side by side on the picnic fabric. The air around them both was full of dwindling laughter over Noah telling silly stories about him and Nicholas and their roommates in LA. At surface level, he seemed to be doing well, despite claiming to hate LA, he appeared to be thriving there. Perhaps it was just the roommates that he enjoyed living with. Noah was never one to enjoy solitude, at least not for long periods of time. When he lived in their hometown, he was rarely wherever he was staying at the time. Getting comfortable anywhere was never his goal or motive. For the most part, it seemed like he enjoyed the constant change, the running. However, the way he talked about their home in California, all the stories he shared that brought the grandest smile to his face or the loudest boom from his chest all took place at their home. Amelia wondered what it must feel like for him to be back in their dreary little town, and if he rattled off all those stories was because he was homesick.
As the space between them flooded with a silence that was equally comfortable and uncomfortable, a question bubbled up that had been eating at Amelia from the moment she laid eyes on the tired darkness hanging beneath Noah’s eyes. His grin for most of the night was wide and toothy but she knew him better than that.
“So,” She turned her head towards him. “How are you, really?”
His eyes stayed transfixed on the stars above and he let a dense quiet settle over them before speaking.
“It must get so exhausting.” He stated, ignoring her question all together.
Her brows furrowed at his words, “What does?”
“Being so bright all the time.” He stated flatly, with a low dejected tone lacing his words.
“The stars?” She questioned with her brows still knitted.
“Sure. The Moon, the cosmos, all of it.” He brought his hands to interlace over his tummy. “Sure, the moon gets a break during the day and gets to disappear for a bit every month. And the stars get to die eventually.
“Right…?”
“But a star’s entire existence is to be bright - they only exist to be bright and then die. The moon works every night to serve as a giant nightlight and to shift some waves around. It must be so exhausting, all of it – being so bright all the time just to burn out into nothing.”
Noah had always been good at avoiding both his feelings and Amelia’s prying questions. It seemed age and time hadn’t changed that specific skill set. Maybe it’s true what they say, people never really change. It worried her that he might’ve not changed at all in that way.
“I mean,” She shifted her head to face the stars again trying to find the answers in the same place he was getting the questions. “You’re not wrong… but, think about the good that they do. The moon does so much on its own for us, you know the tides, the earth’s axis and all that. But we wouldn’t even be here staring at the sky without it all. They’re pretty and,” She shrugs. “And maybe, sometimes, that’s enough.”
“Right.” He responded curtly, pausing a long while before speaking again. “If the moon had consciousness… do you think it would care that most people know it for being pretty and not for being good at its job?” He pondered, not once looking over at the girl, perhaps afraid that his façade would crumble, and he’d spill the truth if he met her eyes.
Amelia’s brows furrowed together once more as she processed his words, doing mental gymnastics to decipher the underlying meaning. Another skill set Noah possessed was being dramatically cryptic, especially when it came to his internal turmoil. Whenever he had some battle waging within him, he suddenly transformed into a makeshift philosopher.
Looking the way he does, it’s fair to assume that his band had garnered recent attention due to his looks – most men would revel in the fleeting female attention, but not Noah. At least not enough to keep him from being contemplative on the lawn of their old park.
Girls or not, Noah had always been particular about his craft. He was lucky he found Nicholas first since he really let Noah take reigns of the entire operation. Like a true perfectionist, Noah carefully curated every song, every show, every rehearsal – even back when they were just playing in Nick’s garage with shitty amps.
Amelia analyzed his words, thinking over her response carefully. “I think the moon would be grateful for the attention either way.” She commented gently. “As long as she’s doing the job she’s meant to do, her beauty getting noticed is just a bonus. As long as she’s doing what she’s destined to do, I think she’d be content doing whatever she needs to, regardless of the affection towards her.”
“Yeah, I guess she would.”
Looking up at the sky, Amelia noticed just how round the moon was that night and how perfectly it was centered in the sky. It looked like the inside of a circus tent, like the star littered sky was just a patterned fabric pierced right in the middle by a giant moon-shaped hole. It felt like it too – as if they were the only ones in some carnival tent far away from anything bad. Below such a vast cosmos, they were just tiny specs of dust in the universe, and she was grateful for the temporary solitude. After years of not even being around Noah, he still made her feel the same. He had a knack for dissolving any real-life problems when they were alone together. When she was with him, she was in a world of their own making. She wondered if she did the same for him, and for his sake, she really hoped she did.
But alas, the bubble they created together that night was not one that could exist forever, and the big top tent must come down after a grand show.
Amelia and Noah ran out of words, at least ones meant to be said that night. They laid side by side with her right hand and his left not even a centimeter apart.
Noah was unaware of whether it was fear, nerves or sadness that fueled the drumming beneath his brittle ribs, but that same force also tugged an invisible string to lift his pinky.
Amelia’s eyes rounded and every muscle in her body tensed up the millisecond she felt him move up and hover over her own pinky.
But before he got the chance to lock over her finger, there was a frightening rustling behind some playground equipment followed by a bright light aimed right at them, blinding the pair.
“Hey! You kids aren’t allowed in here!” Boomed a deep, authoritative voice.
Amelia propped herself up on an elbow and immediately used her arm as a shield to keep the blinding light from burning her retinas any further.
Noah closed his eyes and let out a deep breath through his nose. It was one of the many familiar sounds from the town Noah hoped to never hear again.
“Sebastian? What an unpleasant surprise.” The voice taunted with a vicious edge.
“Officer Hawke.” The eyeroll was thick in Noah’s voice. “So great to see you.”
The big burly man shifted the flashlight beam to Noah directly. “Not shocking that the first time I see you back in town you’re up to no good.” He moved the light back to Amelia’s face. “Also, not shocking that you’ve reunited with your old partner in crime. Corrupting Miss. Alastor again, are we?”
“Officer, we just fell asleep earlier, we didn’t mean to be here so late.” Amelia lied for Noah like she always had. Her and Nick had been the goodie-two-shoes that were always bailing or covering for the long-haired boy. Well, Amelia was truly good, Nick was just skilled at masking his deviant tendencies, using his sweet golden-boy allure to fool everyone. As much as she hated breaking the rules, she secretly loved when Noah enabled it. Her teenage years wouldn’t have been nearly as fun or memorable without the two mischievous boys. Even just lying in the park with Noah after dark made her feel the most alive she’d had in years. It was exhilarating, no matter how much she reprimanded the boy for his reckless rebellion.
“Mhm. Sounds about right, you covering for Mr. Sebastian here, for god knows why.” He speculated, unconvinced. “It’s like I stepped back in time. It seems you both haven’t changed much.”
While the cop had been berating the two, Noah had already began packing up the picnic trying to end the interaction as quickly as possible.
“Sorry officer, it won’t happen again.” She lied.
“Sure.” He retorted. “Get you and your boyfriend out of here. Don’t let me catch you in here again.”
With that he turned and headed back to his vehicle. It was surprising that he just left the pair– not surprising that he just sat and watched them from the comfort of his cop car across the street.
Amelia helped Noah pack everything up before they made their escape from the park. Shortly after they were down the street, the cop car finally drove off. She walked in the direction of her house, thinking that Noah would part ways to maybe head towards Nick’s house to return the stolen items or to Vince’s where he was staying for the time being, but he stayed walking alongside her. He was quiet, which for Noah was strange, especially with her.
“You know, you don’t have to walk me home? I know you’re staying in the opposite direction.” She said, stuffing her cold hands in her pockets.
“I want to. It’s dangerous for you to walk alone.” He replied flatly, kicking a pebble across the sidewalk concrete.
Her house wasn’t particularly far from the other two’s, nothing in the tiny town was necessarily far from each other. With a town as small as theirs, a night walk home wouldn’t usually be considered dangerous.
“Well, thanks.” She replied cautiously.
She let her mind wander to the interaction they had at the park with Officer Hawke. Noah’s mood had been fairly consistent all night up until then. She mentally scolded herself for not realizing that running into the overly familiar cop would affect his demeanor. Maybe she just assumed that after so many years into adulthood he’d be over it, but evidently, it was foolish and incredibly mindless for her to believe so.
The rest of the walk was silent, just filled with the sounds of nature in the winter. The crisp cool air zipping with the wind, crashing into every solid object available while owls coo-ed into the darkness.
Finally, they arrived at the chain-link gate of Amelia’s small home. She rested her arm atop the pointy wires of the fence. Any other night she’d probably invite him in, but it was so late and all of the night’s events had already been enough to overfill her tummy with static-y nerves.
“Well, I-“ They fumble over each other’s words. Warmth blooms across Amelia’s cheeks at the joint misstep.
“You go.” She urged.
“No, you go.” He pushed back with a sheepish grin.
A small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth and dropped her attention down to her feet. “I was just gonna say that this was… nice.” Her teeth dug into her bottom lip. “It was really nice to see you again Noah.” Her tone soft and genuine, as her eyes meet his again.
He was unprepared for how her eyes looked with the moonlight shining directly into them. He couldn’t remember the last time he looked into them so clearly. He forgot how different they were from each other, well, they weren’t really – but they were when one spent looking at them as intently as Noah had since he was 8 years old. Her eyes were both a hazel but one much more brown while the other had a pretty emerald hue.
“Yeah, it was really nice.” His words sounded true, but his voice was still strained by the sadness from the walk there. “I’m really happy I went into the shop this morning.”
Her lips worked overtime to keep from pulling into a giant grin and suddenly she was grateful for the darkness hiding the red staining her cheeks. “Yeah, me too.”
Noah sucked in a breath to speak but pauses, before returning again, “Um - Nick’s family is throwing their annual Christmas party this weekend, I’m sure he and the Ruffilo clan would love to see you.” He stated with his words moving slightly faster than normal almost like he was nervous to even ask, which is silly isn’t it? Being anxious to invite an old friend to a holiday party you both attended every year growing up? It shouldn’t be that nerve wreaking, right? He scratched the back of his neck. “If you want that is.”
Her eyes nearly light up enough to cut through the darkness. “Yeah,” She beamed a sweet smile up at him.  “I think I’d really like that.”
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taglist; @lma1986 @alastriaa @missduffsblog @xxkittenkissesxx @ladyveronikawrites @baddestomens @measuredingold @jilliemiw86
[comment to be added to taglist<3]
A/N; thank you so much for reading - again this is my first time writing in 3rd person so i hope it was decent! i hope you enjoyed even though it is definitely not christmas time lmao - lmk what you think! 💗
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hwaslayer · 8 months
Text
project: make you love me (jyh) | four.
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♣︎ spotify playlist | series masterlist
—summary: yunho can’t stand how you’re so wrapped up in the notorious campus fuckboy, park seonghwa. he would gladly love you the way you deserve, despite being shy, awkward and the complete opposite of seonghwa. thus, when he finds himself spending more time with you over literature reviews and random study sessions, he decides to take on the challenge to win you over.
—pairing: jeong yunho x f. reader x park seonghwa
—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers/friends to lovers, college au | fluff, angst, smut
—word count: 5.6k
—chapter content/warnings: cussing/mature language, chaery being bold per usual lol (but shes a cutie and we love her), oc and yunho get to know each other more, mentions of sickness/being ill (not oc or yunho), yunho's mom is a single mom, hwa gets a little 😕 but oc knows how to put her foot down, say hello to mingi!!, mingi brings something up and it kinda rubs yunho the wrong way but boy has patience
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"We're getting lunch with Jongho and them. Coming?" You shake your head as you walk alongside Soobin, with Seungmin and Chaery trailing behind.
"Nope, no can do." You say. "I'm taking Yunho to lunch to repay him for the ni—" Seungmin looks at you and you pause. Right. Soobin and Chaery don't know Seonghwa left you stranded. "Foooor his help with my reviews." You backtrack a bit, hoping the two didn't catch on.
"Oh, that's sweet of you." Chaery says. "You definitely should! We won't be home 'till later either, soo.. " She giggles and you shake your head at her forwardness.
"So.. what, Chaery?" You glare at her.
"Yeah, what is wrong with you?" Seungmin laughs a bit. "You'll scare him away."
"I will not! I'm just saying, the option is there." She puckers her lips and wiggles her brows.
"Anyway, I'm just going to grab lunch with him at the cute, new brunch place downtown. Let me know if you want anything?" You stop in your tracks, realizing you've walked farther than you should've. Yunho mentioned he was going to be at the Engineering Center, which is in the opposite direction.
"Sounds good." Soobin gives you a small, pursed smile; dimples dotting his cheeks as he sends an animated wave. "See you? Have fun, be safe!"
"Thanks." You wave to your friends as you watch them walk off without. You turn on your heel to walk back towards the building that Yunho just ended class in, picking up your pace when you realize you're running a little late compared to the time you promised to meet him. As you close in on the building, you catch sight of the tall boy and his fluffy black hair.
"Yunho!" Yunho whips his head around to see you walking towards him. He smiles a bit and stops, waiting for you to catch up. "Hey! I was just about to text you. You still free to grab brunch with me, right?"
"Yeah, I was waiting." He teases, making you chuckle.
"I know, I'm too slow. Sorry." You joke back. "Let's go." You look up at him and he nods.
"How was class?"
"Mm, same old. What about you?"
"It was okay. Another small project I gotta work on."
"Sounds fun." You gently nudge him with your elbow. "Computer Science right?" He nods.
"Public Health?"
"Wow, a point for Jeong Yunho." He laughs.
"Y/N, it's not an entirely huge school. You know a lot of people, and people know you."
"For the wrong reasons, most likely."
"No. Just for being you." He says with a soft smile on his face.
"Are you always this smooth talking to girls?" He laughs and shakes his head.
"Quite the opposite actually. It's just.. easy to talk to you, I guess." He looks down at his feet timidly.
"I'm glad." You chuckle. "So, I'm thinking of taking you to Cafe 24. Does that sound okay?"
"The new brunch place?" He smiles, and it adds a rosy tint to his cheeks. "Cool. I've heard good things about it already."
"Yeah?" You ask in an animated, questioning tone. "Nice. I'm excited."
"Your friends didn't wanna come?" You finally get to your car and toss your bag in the trunk, signaling for Yunho to put his things down as well.
"Hell no. Or else, they'll order everything expecting me to pay." You sigh. "So, nope! This is just for you, especially as my small token of appreciation." Yunho doesn't say anything besides let out a small laugh before hopping into your car and settling in. "By the way, I drive as safely as possible, so please don't make fun of me."
"I won't." Yunho watches as you adjust your seat closer to the wheel. Once you feel content, you start the car and double check your mirrors before pulling out of the spot and driving off.
Luckily, the drive isn't far or else Yunho wasn't sure what he'd do. It's not that he was uncomfortable around you, but he's not used to keeping the small talk alive— let alone engaging and being the first to break the silence.
You seem to understand him well though, because besides the few questions you ask him about the week, you don't push the conversation. 
And it's nice.
He listens to the music you have on, hearing you softly hum in the driver's seat as you carefully navigate the narrow downtown roads and find a spot near the café.
"Sweeeet." He hears you giggle as you pull into a parking spot that just opened up. "We're here!"
"There's not too many people?" Yunho says in a questioning tone as he unbuckles his seatbelt and peeks at the front door. It's busy, but not enough for a wait. You check your phone and take note of the fact that it's still earlier than noon— you and Yunho barely missing the lunch rush. 
"Still early, I guess." You greet one of the staff members and she immediately brings you and Yunho to a table in the back corner. She lays out the menu in front of you, giving you a moment to glaze over the options while she heads to the back to grab water. "Everything looks so good." Yunho chuckles.
"Anything you've been craving for?"
"Something sweet?" Your eyes widen at the sight of 'matcha mochi waffles' on the menu, pondering whether or not you should give in to your sweet tooth or get something a little more filling on the savory side. "But now, I'm torn. I kinda wanna taste the omurice." 
"You can have some of mine?" Yunho was eyeing the omurice anyway, and he doesn't mind sharing some with you.
"Really?" Your eyes sparkle and it makes Yunho's ears turn red. He's feeling shy now because yes, really. Yes, you're cute.
"Yeah, I don't mind." You smile.
"Hm, okay. You can have some of my mochi waffle and bacon?" He shakes his head.
"It's alright, Y/N. It's not a big deal."
"Yes, it is. It's a new brunch place and who knows when we'll be back. You should taste it." He doesn't respond, just simply smiles back at your argument. At this point, the waitress is back with two waters and asks if you two would like anything to drink. Yunho declines, but you happily order a vanilla latte. She asks if you're ready to order, eyes darting to Yunho for some kind of acknowledgement— which he gives to you in the form of a simple nod. She takes down your orders and lets you know that she'll be back with your latte, taking your menus before she's off to the kitchen. "So." Yunho looks at you after he's been people-watching through the window.
"Hm?" He hums.
"Tell me about yourself, Yunho." You say softly. Typically, Yunho hates these kinda things. He'll usually respond very vaguely to cut it off at a certain point. He just doesn't think people need to know much about him, nor does he really find himself interesting. But for now, he'll dive in a little more. He doesn't seem to find the harm in it when it comes to you.
"I don't even know where to start?" He laughs a bit. "I'm not sure what you want to know."
"Anything." The waitress brings your latte and you immediately start blowing at it to cool it down. "Tell me anything."
"I'm an only child?" He starts off with an unsure tone, but you nod in response to reassure him. "Home is two hours away at my aunt's house."
"Sweet. If you don't mind me asking.. have you always lived with your aunt?" 
"Yeah, I have. She's my mom's sister, and my mom is sick." Your eyes soften. "She has kidney issues so she's on dialysis. She's still strong and all, but it's nice that my aunt is there. She helps take care of her and bring her to appointments, especially while I'm away most of the time." You nod quietly.
"What about your dad?" He shrugs.
"Uh, he left when I was young, so I don't really know much about him."
"Shoot. I'm so sorry, Yunho. I didn't mean to—"
"Nah, it's okay. I don't mind talking about it, but I also can't give better responses since I don't know much myself." 
"You must be very close to your mom." Yunho thinks about his mom for a second, taking mental note that he needs to call her later. She has always been so strong, and she's always been Yunho's driving force. Even though he didn't have his dad around, he never felt like he lacked love or support because he mom did a fantastic job covering all of those bases no matter what. 
She never let Yunho down. And he only hopes he can do the same in return.
"I am."
"I can only imagine how tough it is."
"Yeah." He lets out a breath. "But, she's doing well. She's been well for a long time. All I can ask for." You give him a tiny toothless smile.
"I'm glad to hear that."
"W-what about you?" He clears is throat to try and brush off the slight nervousness he feels asking these questions. Surely, you asked about him. But, you wouldn't mind sharing your own facts, right?
"I have an older sister who works in finance. She's 4 years older than me. My parents split up, but my dad still comes around to hang out. They're better this way, I think. Their relationship is much healthier." You also start thinking about your parents, reminiscing about the tough times when they used to fight for days on end. Luckily, you and your sister were close— you could lean onto her like you do with your bestfriends. She tried to protect you and keep you safe as much as possible, tried to shield you from the negativity even though it was hard to. Eventually, your parents had enough and split; though, you'd like to think this was their silver lining since they're much better around each other now.
"I see." Yunho sips his water. "It's nice he's still around."
"Mhm." You tilt your head. "Do you have a lot of friends back home?"
"I wouldn't say lots. A few people that I grew up with still live around my area, but most people have moved."
"That's cool to still see some childhood friends, though." It's your turn to sip. "How do you know Mingi so well?"
"We went to the same high school. We have some common interests, but that's it? We just hang out with different crowds." Yunho shrugs. "Mingi finds certain people and certain things fun that I don't necessarily find fun. He's a big social butterfly."
"Yeah, I see that." You chuckle.
"You and your friends seem really close. Did you meet here?"
"We did." You smile. "Chaery and I were roommates and Soobin and Seungmin lived across the hall from us."
"Did you meet Chaery before you two moved in?"
"Nope. Just that day." You laugh. "Believe it or not. We clicked really well and got close easily. I got lucky with her." At this point, the waitress comes with your plate and tells Yunho she'll be back with his as they're just finishing up in the kitchen. "Then we met Soobin and Seungmin. And they slowly started coming into our room more often. Turned into going to the cafeteria together, to hanging out and studying in our room together."
"That's good. It's always nice to have solid, good friends around."
"Yeah." You look at him. He notices that you aren't eating your food, and he feels bad that you are waiting for him. So, he clears his throat again and mutters out a quick—
"Oh, you don't have to wait for me." He looks at you, then down at your food.
"No, it's okay Yunho. I'll wait." You nod. "Speaking of roommates, are you close to Yeosang?"
"Uh, we're cool, I guess?" He shyly laughs. "We randomly got paired up because we're in the same major." The waitress sets his plate down and he pauses for a brief moment to thank her and asks for an extra plate. When she leaves, he returns his attention back to you. "Anyway. One day, he asked if I knew anyone who needed a roommate. At the time, I was renting a room in this couple's home. I didn't mind it, and they were super friendly. But, I figured having more space would be nice instead of being confined to a room and feeling shy about going into the shared kitchen and bathroom." You laugh.
"I get that, totally understandable." Yunho is splitting some of his omurice [a bit more than you expected] and placing it neatly on the extra plate before scooting it your way. "Wait. Yunho, that's a lot." You look at him worriedly and he shakes his head, continuing to edge the plate towards you.
"No, it's not." You look at him and he gives you a small smile. "Promise."
"Thank you." You say, cutting him a good chunk of your waffle and placing it on the edge of his plate. "I know you said you and Yeosang are cool so.. do you hang out often at home?"
"We'll talk and have dinner sometimes, but most of the time, we're in our rooms playing games." You giggle and Yunho's ears turn red. "Wow, I probably sounded ridiculous saying that."
"No, no. Soobin and Seungmin have a tendency to do that too. As long as it makes you happy and content, right?"
"Mmyeah."
"How often do you go home?"
"Hm, I try to go every other weekend? But, sometimes plans don't work out that way. I just try to go as soon as I can."
"I see." You continue to hold a conversation in between bites, with topics ranging from school, your majors, things your friends have gotten into.
Dancing.
Yunho observes you as you talk about your dance team and how much you enjoy it, and he loves the way your eyes twinkle; the way you animatedly move your hands while describing the team and its accomplishments, the way you giggle in between. He can tell you really enjoy it, and he's truly happy you have something to fall onto when times get rough, something to help celebrate when you're having good days.
He just can't understand how Seonghwa fits in this mix. He doesn't, he shouldn't. You are too good for him, and you have way more to offer.
"So.. yeah, that's us. We're small, but we're fun. And I think people on campus enjoy our pieces." Yunho laughs a bit before finishing up his food. He feels bad since he's never really gone out of his way to watch any of your performances, but maybe he should.
"Let me know when your next one is?"
"You'll come?" You ask with so much hope in your eyes. Yeah, maybe he should this time.
"Yeah, if I don't have anything planned."
"Oh, so we're the backup plan." You tease and Yunho shakes his head.
"No, not like that. You know what I mean. If I'm around and not at home."
"Of course." You tilt your head and smile at him. "I'll text you details later." You set aside your plate and sit back in your seat, feeling stuffed but content with your meal. You call for the waitress to bring over the check, instantly handing off your card in fear of Yunho trying to swoop in. "Oof, I'm full. But, that was so good. I really liked it."
"It was." Yunho sets his own plate aside and sips on some water. "Thanks again, you really didn't have to."
"I did. Small token of appreciation for the help you've been giving me. I've always struggled with these things so having someone patiently explain and walk me through improvements means a lot." You say before getting up and grabbing your things. "Ready?" Yunho nods before following you out. "Are you going to work in the library until class?"
"Probably."
"Do you mind if I join you?" Yunho looks down at you with a small smile.
"Not at all."
You make the trek back to school comfortably, parking in the lot near the library so that you and Yunho won't have to do too heavy of a walk. The both of you are engaging in more small talk, with Yunho feeling a bit more comfortable to joke around with you. He doesn't dare bring up Seonghwa because he knows it isn't his business, but also because he'd hate to see your mood shift.
You look good happy.
Getting back to the library, you scoot yourself into the opposite side of the booth and face Yunho. He immediately pulls out his laptop to do some work, not really saying much as his focus is redirected on trying to understand the new project they were just assigned. He glances over the edge of his laptop from time to time though, and you don't really catch it because you're too immersed in the note-taking you're doing. You write so precisely, so neatly; switching from one colored pen to the next before highlighting in a super straight line. His eyes glance up to your face, your features, before shifting his attention back down to his assignments.
Cutie.
"What's up, Yunho?" Yunho is pulled out of his thoughts when he hears that familiar deep voice. Seonghwa smirks at him before his eyes land on you. You don't look too happy to see him right now, but Yunho knows Seonghwa still has the upper hand here, and honestly, it sucks. "Hey Y/N, can I talk to you?"
"Why?"
"Cause, it's important." He licks his lips when his smile fades. "Please?" Your eyes dart from Yunho, back to Seonghwa. Yunho just quietly glances at you though, trying his best to mind his own business and let you decide on your own. But he's begging, pleading, in his mind that you don't leave with Seonghwa. Not after he left you in the cold the way he did.
Too bad it was a wishful thought.
"Fine." You huff before packing up your things and start to slide out of the booth. "Talk to you later? Thanks for today." You give Yunho a soft, apologetic smile, and he can only nod in acknowledgment before you're walking off next to that asshole. He continues to watch as you two walk down and into a random aisle of books. You can't help but scoff at Seonghwa again when you realize he's hiding because of course he doesn't want too many people in his business and to see you two so close. Of course he needs to do this in the fucking history aisle of the library. "This is your idea of talking?" All he does is chuckle a bit before he's tucking a piece of your hair behind the ear.
"Baby, seriously? Why are you hanging around Yunho so much?"
"Because we're friends?" He snorts.
"Since when? I don't ever recall Yunho being in your little circle."
"Oh my god, Seonghwa. He's been helping me with some assignments. What is this really about?" He shrugs.
"Nothing, I already told you. I'm not trying to share, not with him." You furrow your brows.
"Share?" You scoff. Clearly, you were just a possession to him. "We aren't dating. You made that very loud and clear from the beginning."
"Still. The dude can't even pull his own girl—"
"Stop." You put your hand out and shake your head. "If you're just gonna talk shit, let me get back to doing homework with Yunho. I don't have time for it." He sighs heavily and tries to pull you into him by the elbows.
"Okay, I'm sorry. I just got worried because you didn't answer my text last night."
"Worried over me, or because you weren't getting any?"
"Come on, Y/N. Cut that shit out."
"No, you cut that shit out. It was freezing last night. I fucking waited for you at the spot for an hour."
"And I said I was sorry. I wanted to make it up to you last night but you didn't respond. I feel really bad about it, but what am I supposed to do when you won't even talk to me?"
"Seriously?" You let out a sigh. "Whatever you say." He sucks his teeth and lifts your chin with his finger.
"Baby, I'm trying here. If I didn't care about you, I wouldn't be doing this." You simply stare at him. You know he's lying, and you know he genuinely doesn't care about you. There is not one honest bone in his body that actually gives a damn about you. He's telling you what you wanna hear because he knows it'll work every—single—time. 
"I don't know—"
"I'll wait for you until you're done with practice tonight, how about that? You can just shower at my place so we can hang out all night."
"That's the issue, you're never there after practice."
"I will be. I promise." He pouts a bit. "I'll be there waiting for you." He laces your hand with his and kisses the surface. "Walk with me to class?" You look at him, but all you can think about is leaving Yunho. You let out a sigh knowing all you want to do is avoid conflict, shrugging at his question.
"Fine."
"That's my girl." He leads the way out of the aisle, giving Yunho the pettiest nod you've ever seen. You try to avoid eye contact since you felt bad for leaving.
But, fuck. You just needed to get through the day in one peace. 
He swings an arm around you for a second before he sees his friends on the way to class. He gives you a quick peck on the cheek just as he reaches his classroom, leaving you to finish up work at the nearby student center.
The day goes on [peacefully], and you're off to dance practice with your friends. You forget about everything for a moment while you're with them, enjoying the time that you get to spend all together even if it's through dance. They invite you to hang out with the group afterwards, but you politely decline especially when you actually see Seonghwa waiting outside in his car. You give your friends big hugs before waving goodbye, and settle yourself into Seonghwa's car.
He talks about his day for a bit, even as you walk into his apartment and see San eating his dinner. He doesn't really ask about yours, nor does he care enough to. He does ask if you've eaten and if you want some food, but you shake your head and tell him you'll be off to shower and finish your homework in his room. Throughout your shower, you can hear him and San laughing loudly in the dining area before they're going at each other's necks while playing FIFA.
You feel like you're just.. there.
You silently sit against the wall as you type away on your laptop, sighing as Seonghwa and San continue to yell over their last game. You find that you aren't really in the mood to be here, but you hang on to see what Seonghwa's version of 'making it up to you' means.
Should've known it wasn't shit.
Especially when he barges into his room and shuts the door, immediately kissing you before trailing a few soft kisses down your neck. He thinks you're enjoying it, so he keeps peppering your neck even as you gently try to pry him off.
"Hwa." You call his name and he ignores it, fingers slightly fiddling with the waistband of his sweats that you're wearing. "Seonghwa, stop." You say, pushing him back. "Stop." You repeat with a harder push when he almost dips his hand into your sweats.
"W-what? What's wrong?" He furrows his brows when he backs up to read your expression, your body language. Suddenly, you feel out of place, feeling like you wanna go home and be in your own peace.
You did not wanna be here. Not with him.
"I'm just.. not in the mood. Can you take me home?"
"Not in the mood?" He repeats. "What, should I have gone slower? Did I do something—"
"Seonghwa, please just take me home. I'm not asking twice." You say and he lets out a scoff as he hops off the bed and grabs his keys. 
"Alright, whatever." He says, digging his hands into his pockets while walking out of his room. You change into the extra clothes you brought in your duffle bag, setting his clothes neatly into his laundry hamper. You quietly trail behind him as you tug on your bag and watch your feet drag you to his car. You hop in and Seonghwa doesn't say a word, instantly starting up the car and driving off. You can tell he's upset by the way his jaw is clenched, the way his hand tightly wraps around the wheel.
The way he drives.
A rather quick drive becomes even quicker, and you're glad you don't live far from his apartment. This entire ride feels suffocating and you can't wait to leave entirely. He pulls into your lot and brakes near the curb, giving you time to step out of his car. He doesn't give you another look, nor does he say anything— you simply slam the door shut and he races off, leaving before paying you any mind.
Perfect.
This wasn't anything new, but tonight feels awful. You start to feel guilty for whatever happened, though you shouldn't.
You shouldn't feel guilty.
You let out a shaky sigh as you step into your apartment, your roommates not being home since they're out with the dance group. You set your things aside and quickly take a shower before plopping onto your bed and doing.. nothing.
You want to do nothing.
You scroll through your phone as you try your hardest not to let any tears fall. They shouldn't, you did nothing wrong. But everything feels wrong, suffocating.
You hate feeling this way.
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Yunho is getting ready to wrap up his work for the day when he sees a body slide into the booth he's currently occupying.
"Sup dude." Mingi says.
"Yo." Yunho responds. "What are you still doing here?" He asks, unfamiliar with Mingi's presence during these evening hours in the library.
"I had to work on a group project." Yunho continues to draft out some notes for his project while Mingi sits back and lets out a breath. "Another project?"
"Yup. How'd your group project go?"
"Eh. It's alright, but we're done. Just need to present." Mingi scrolls through his phone. "I saw you with Y/N earlier." Yunho pauses to briefly look at him before returning his attention back to his notebook. "I didn't know you two knew each other." He chuckles.
"We have literature class together, and I was helping her with some reviews."
"You seem close, though? Have you always been close?" Yunho shrugs at two things— one, he definitely can't say you two are close, and two, how nosy Mingi is being. It must be for Seonghwa.
"Not really. She's cool, though."
"Hm." Mingi hums before putting his phone down on the table. "Yeah, she is. I don't know what Hwa's deal is sometimes."
"Mm, but you would never mention it to him." Yunho teases with a small chuckle, but he means it. He absolutely means it.
"I just feel like it isn't my place to. Me and San have both told him to chill, but can't force someone to act a certain way if they don't want to." Yunho shrugs.
Fine, he thinks. But, Mingi could at least tell the guy when he's wrong and what he's done wrong, right? He would at least hope that's part of their conversations, and he knows Mingi is aware of right vs. wrong. 
No better way than letting someone know the truth. 
Seonghwa is wrong damn near more than half of the time.
"Yeah, I guess." Is all Yunho responds with.
"He does like her, though." Yunho looks at him with tightly-knit brows. What does he mean Seonghwa likes you? That's his way of showing his feelings for you? And it must be obvious that Yunho is feeling a certain way about that statement because Mingi instantly backs it up with a— "I mean like, I know he has some kind of feelings for her. He does more for her than I've seen him do for anyone else. I just don't know why he's stringing her along and not being more serious." 
"Like.. what? Leave her in the cold until he's ready to pick her up? Really shows his feelings." Yunho sarcastically responds. "Anyway, sure. It's not really my business."
"Are you sure?"
"What?"
"You seem interested in her."
"Because we hung out?" Yunho shrugs. "Okay, Mingi."
"I only bring it up because he's mentioned it. Hwa can get pretty protective and jealous. I don't want him to start shit with you—"
"He doesn't need to." Yunho responds. "Not really on me anyway, I'm not the one in the wrong."
"Right, I guess."
"I know he's your friend, but she deserves way better. You can tell me all of this, and it still won't change my mind." Yunho chimes in one last time, completely over the conversation. "If she isn't happy, he shouldn't be selfish enough to continue trapping her." He finishes up his notes before closing his notebook and packing up.
"You're right." Is all Mingi replies with while watching Yunho pack up. Because what can he say? Of course, he agrees. But he has this weird obligation, this loyalty, to Seonghwa because of their friendship.
"I'm gonna head out." Yunho slides to the end of the booth before throwing his bag over his shoulder. "Gonna stay behind?"
"Nah, I'll come with. Wasn't planning on staying any longer." Yunho nods, allowing Mingi to walk alongside of him. He's a little annoyed, but in a weird and unconventional way, he knows Mingi didn't mean any harm. He knows he didn't mean to intentionally attack him. 
Still, though. His point about Park Seonghwa stands.
Yunho continues his walk to the car with Mingi, the topic of discussion now being new game releases and a party that's coming up soon at one of the athlete's homes. Mingi extends the invite to Yunho, but Yunho shakes his head and tells him he doesn't think he'd end up going. He might change his mind if he feels better about it when the time gets closer, but as of now— it feels like a hard no.
Once Yunho and Mingi finally part ways, Yunho climbs into his car and begins his silent drive home. He starts pondering about his day and how he actually really enjoyed it. He feels comfortable enough to be himself around you, and he can't say that for many people.
You are enticing to him.
When he gets home, everything feels still— quiet. The night sky is dotted with stars, while the crickets chirp.
"Mom." He says, parking his car off to the curb and grabbing his things.
"Yunho, baby." She says a bit lowly. "How are you? How was your day?"
"I'm alright, just hanging in there. Had lunch with a friend before working on a few projects." He begins to walk to his apartment. "How are you feeling?"
"Good! Your aunt and I went out for a walk, then shopped for a few things today." Yunho chuckles. 
"Cute. Weather's been nice. Glad you guys have been getting out."
"Yeah, enough about that though. A friend, hm?" She chuckles.
"Yeah." Yunho smiles. "We have the same class together. I've been helping her with some of the assignments."
"So, it's a her." Yunho can hear his aunt giggling in the background, making him roll his eyes.
"Uh huh—" Before he can start lecturing his mom and aunt about how you two are merely friends, classmates, another call comes through on the line. He stops in his tracks and quickly removes the phone from his ear to see who's calling. "Mom, can I call you back in a second? I just got home."
"Okay, get settled. I love you!" She says in a sing-song manner and Yunho laughs a bit.
"Love you too." He responds before ending that call and switching to the next. "Hey. Is everything okay?"
You chuckle on the other line before responding with a shaky: "Why wouldn't things be, Yunho?"
"I don't know. Just wasn't expecting your call, is all."
"I'm sorry, are you busy? I'm so dumb, I really shouldn't have—"
"It's okay, Y/N. Seriously. I just got home from the library." He steps inside his apartment finding that Yeosang is in his beloved cave, yelling at his computer screen per usual. He walks into his room and places his things down, settling onto his computer chair with a soft sigh.
"Okay." You haven't said much and it's obvious to Yunho that something is indeed wrong. You needed someone and you turned to Yunho for comfort.
God, he sucks at this. But, he wants to be there for you.
"What's going on?"
"Huh? Nothing. I just wanted to check on you." He chuckles.
"I don't get very far, Y/N. Don't worry." Silence. "What's bothering you?"
"How do you know something's bothering me?"
"I can practically hear you thinking from here." You giggle and it warms Yunho's heart. At least his effort is somewhat working.
"I.. was at Seonghwa's not too long ago. And I just didn't wanna be there. I asked him to take me home and he was upset. I don't know why I feel bad about it."
"Feel bad? What is there to feel bad about?"
"Maybe I should've asked him in a better way, I don't know. I felt suffocated and demanded rather than politely telling him."
"Y/N, you don't owe him anything. You don't need to explain anything to him. He doesn't need to be upset about you going home because that's your own choice. He's mad because he didn't get his way for once. Still not your problem." You let out a shaky sigh and a tear manages to slide down your cheek. This was so dumb, you shouldn't have called Yunho to vent about this.
"This must sound so dumb, I'm sorry Yunho—"
"It's not dumb. Don't be sorry." Silence, again. "I hope you know that if things don't get better, you were never in the wrong. You don't need him."
"I know." Yunho doesn't say much because he doesn't wanna attack you or make you feel worse. So, he sits there. Listening to you breathe.
Listening to you sigh, be upset.
"Yunho?"
"Mhm?"
"I'm sorry for leaving you behind earlier."
"It's okay, you don't have to apologize."
"Mind if I join you at the library again tomorrow?" He softly smiles to himself and nods as if you can see him.
"You're always welcome to join me."
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