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#I lost a lot of weight & my rings have been loose but I think my activity level didn't help
beastofwant · 1 year
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how have I lost my eye ring twice in one day???
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coffeeghoulie · 7 months
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Kinktober Day #28: Stupification
The Ghostober prompts were put together by @kroas-adtam, and divider made by @gothdaddyissues, thank you both so much!
Pairing: Cirrus/Mountain
Contains: 1.9k of Mountain getting Cirrus out of her head after a long, stressful day on tour.
Special thanks to @askingforthesun for letting me bounce ideas off of them, I may or may not have stolen that dialogue, sorry :).
Read under the cut or on AO3!
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Before they left for tour, Aether had taken Cirrus gently by the arm, smiling at her the way he had when she was fresh summoned, and asked her to watch over the pack the way he had in his absence. Cirrus was not one to say no, especially not to Aether.
She took her new role in the pack seriously, helping keep her mates in line, well behaved for Papa and the roadies. They listen to her, admire her, respect her.
But when things go wrong, they go very wrong, and Cirrus takes the weight of that on herself.
It's nearing the end of the tour, everyone at wit's end, when a particularly rough Ritual hits them. Equipment that had been reliable for weeks suddenly on the fritz, Swiss and Dew nearly unglamoured on stage, snapping and rutting and pissing each other off. The tipping point is when Papa does a headcount at the end of the night, and comes up one ghoul short.
It takes half an hour to find Aeon, who's managed to get lost in the identical winding corridors of the venue. Cirrus nearly scruffs him and drags him back to the bus, at the end of her rope, but he looks so genuinely disappointed in himself, she can't find the energy.
Her hands ache, her glamour feels too tight, and her head, oh her head. Even with earpieces in, her elevated ghoul hearing means her ears ring after every Ritual. And the thoughts. She didn't do enough to keep her mates behaving on stage. She didn't do enough to help the roadies with the equipment. She didn't keep a close enough eye on one of their newest pack members. It won't stop.
Cirrus realizes what she has to do to stop it by the time they finally get to the hotel.
She puts a hand on Rain's shoulder, clutching her duffle bag. He looks exhausted, ready to take a long bath and sleep. "Yeah, breeze? What's up?" he yawns.
"I know you're assigned a room with Mountain, gup, but would you like to room with Dew?" She asks, holding out her keycard. "I need to talk to Mounty."
Rain's eyes widen in understanding, and he leans in to press his forehead against hers reassuringly. "Of course, breeze. Get some sleep, okay?"
She nods, smiling with all the warmth she can muster, which isn't really a lot. "You too." Cirrus kisses him sweet on the cheek before swapping keycards with him. She slinks into the elevator, slumping against the back wall. She finds Rain's room number, and waits for a solid moment to try and collect herself before unlocking the door.
Mountain looks up from his bag as the door opens. He looks exhausted, still sweaty from the Ritual, and Cirrus feels her heart sink as his face falls from his normal easy smile. "Cir?" he asks, tossing aside the hoodie he had pulled out of his bag. "I thought Rain was rooming with me tonight, jasmine."
Cirrus's shoulders slump, feeling the cracks race up her fragile porcelain facade. "Mount," she whispers, hands shaking as she steps forward. "Mount, I need-"
The earth ghoul rises to his feet, slowly as not to startle her. "I know, jasmine," he breathes, cupping her face in one of his massive hands. "You need me to help you get out of your head?"
She nods, breathing a sigh of relief. "Please, nothing went right and it was my fault."
Mountain nods, eyes flicking up as he thinks. "Cirrus," he says, a devastating look in his eye. "Nothing that happened tonight was your fault."
Cirrus shakes her head, her dark hair falling in front of her face. "I know, Mount. My brain doesn't. Won't stop telling me it is."
"Alright," he nods firmly, pulling at a hair tie on his wrist and throwing his hair loosely up out of his face. "We'll get it to stop. I want you to strip for me, unglamour yourself, and kneel on the center of the bed."
Cirrus nods, eyes fluttering shut in relief. She tosses her bag onto the spare queen bed that they both know they won't be using, and she works at the buttons of her shirt. She can already feel the buzzing at the front of her mind start to quiet, and though it's not much, she could cry with relief.
Mountain takes a step back, arms crossed as he silently watches her undress. His tail sways slowly behind him, nodding as she climbs up onto the mattress, her own tail wrapped around her thigh.
"Tell me how to stop this," Mountain says, eyes raking heavily up and down her body. Cirrus shivers.
"Yellow to pause, red to stop. One snap for yellow, two for red," Cirrus recites, eyes focused on a point on the far wall.
"Good girl," Mountain says, running clawed fingers through her hair. He's tall enough that even though she's kneeling up on the mattress, he towers over her like she's on the floor. Cirrus leans into the touch, eyes fluttering shut.
"Ah," Mountain tuts, pushing her upright gently. "Stay still. Be good and do what you're told."
She opens her mouth to reply, but he tightens his grip in her hair. Not enough to hurt, but enough to get the message across that he doesn't want her to speak right now.
"Trust me, jasmine. I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you," he coos, rubbing his thumb against her jaw. "All you need to do is listen to me, kneel there and look pretty."
Cirrus nods, feeling the mattress dip behind her as Mountain settles. He rests a giant hand on the small of her back, sliding it upwards until it rests between her shoulder blades, pushing her down until she catches herself on her elbows.
She can't see what he's doing, and she can feel the weight of his gaze on the back of her head as he pushes her into the mattress.
"Shh, jasmine, turn off that brain. I can hear those gears turning, sweetheart," he says, voice so low it rumbles soothingly. Cirrus keens, craning her neck to look back at him. He's taken his shirt off, sweat slick chest shining in the lamplight.
She tries, damn it all she tries, but the more she focuses on not thinking, the more her brain wants to think. "Mount," she whines, tail beginning to thrash anxiously behind her. Waves of distress start to roll off of her, the air in the hotel room suddenly smelling stale.
"Oh, jas," he hums, hand still square between her shoulder blades. "Now. If I were Aeth, or maybe Aeon, I'd be able to go in there and turn it all off for you. I can still do that, but it's going to take a little bit of effort on my part. Color, sweet girl?"
"Green," she hums.
He nudges her knees apart, watching for any kind of reaction. She whines, tail beating against the mattress softly as she feels his gaze on her core. Mountain runs a long finger along her folds, just barely ghosting over her clit. "Already so wet for me, pretty girl. So eager to go brainless for me."
She nods into the mattress, feeling her head starting to go fuzzy as Mountain teases at her entrance.
"Just focus on what you're feeling. Get out of that pretty head and let yourself feel good," he hums, carefully pressing his middle finger inside of her. Cirrus keens at the stretch, her joints relaxing as she slumps into the mattress.
Mountain's other hand comes up to her hip, grabbing it tight enough to hold her up as he fingers her. "That's it. Good girl, jas. No thoughts in that pretty little head, good girls don't need thoughts, such a silly idea. Just let me do all the thinking, turn that useless brain right off. We'll turn it back on when we need it, okay, sweetheart?" he rambles, not expecting an answer.
Cirrus can't respond, whining into the mattress as she focuses on Mountain's fingers inside of her.
"Oh, is the pretty girl drooling for it?" Mountain asks, grinning as he sees the spit shining on her lips. "Oh, sweetheart, jasmine, I've barely gotten started." He ducks down, removing his fingers, and licks a stripe up from her clit to her entrance, moaning as he gets a taste of her.
She keens as his stubble scrapes against the insides of her thighs, rocking back on her knees to try and get more.
Mountain chuckles against her cunt, grabbing her gently by the ass, dimpling the flesh as he opens her to him. "That's it, baby, it's all quiet in there, isn't it?" He asks before diving in. He eats at her like he's fresh from the Pit and starving, lapping hungrily at her slick.
Cirrus shouts, and Mountain winces at the noise complaint they're bound to get, but shrugs it off, licking and sucking at her clit, a ghoul on a mission. But since he's no Rain, he pulls back, chest heaving as he catches his breath. "Cum whenever you like, sweet girl. Don't have to ask. You deserve to feel good." He dives back in, with fingers and tongue this time, determined to get her floating.
It doesn't take much longer until Cirrus is cumming over his tongue with a shriek, just barely aware enough not to rip through the bedding with her claws. Her limbs give out, collapsing onto her stomach as her entire body trembles.
"Good girl," Mountain coos, working her through it, rubbing her clit gently. "So good, sweetheart. Float as long as you need. Nice and quiet."
She doesn't know how long it takes until she's back in her body. Mountain's rearranged her so she's laying against the pillows on her back, drowning in his hoodie, long enough to be a thigh length dress on her. He's not there, but the light is on in the bathroom, and she can hear the sink running.
"Mount?" she asks, surprised at how hoarse her voice is.
"Just a sec, jasmine," Mountain calls from the bathroom. He comes back out with a glass of water and a clean face, sitting on the edge of the mattress next to her. He takes her hand, dwarfed by his, and helps her drink. Mountain sets the empty glass down on the nightstand, turning back to her and smoothing her dark navy hair off of her forehead, petting over her short horn. "How're you feeling, sweetheart?"
Cirrus hums, leaning into Mountain's touch. "Better," she whispers, shutting her eyes. "So much better, Mounty."
He smiles warmly down at her. "Cirrus," he says, leaning down to kiss right between her horns. "You did so good for me."
Cirrus smiles, trying her best to keep her eyes open. The adrenaline rush from the Ritual and then from the orgasm Mountain had wrung from her was starting to crash.
Mountain's observant enough to notice, laying down next to her, helping her roll onto her stomach and hooking one of her legs over his, cushioning her head on his bare chest. He starts to purr, a low rumble that buzzes soothingly through her. "You work so hard for our pack, Cir. You do so good, and yeah, sometimes things go wrong. But that's just how things are. It's not your fault, jasmine. Tomorrow will be better."
"Yeah," Cirrus whispers, warm and safe where's she's tucked against Mountain's stomach. "Tomorrow will be better."
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randomquietkid · 2 years
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"He always will"
𝗔 𝗝𝗝 𝘅 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗽𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘆 "𝗦𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗯𝗲" 𝗯𝘆 𝗧𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗠𝗰𝗥𝗮𝗲
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Lately you have been struggling with your body, and haven't been eating as much. You thought the pogues wouldn't notice but they did. And when JJ finally asks you about it you break down to him. (Hope you enjoy. I was listening to this song on repeat and got inspiration from it. This song for me hits a little close to home as I've always struggled with my body so more stories like this will be coming so look out. And remember if any of you think this I love you and you are enough ♡. And as always don't be afraid to send in requests there is a pinned post on my page with all the characters I would write about. And thank you for reading)
Enjoy <3
Trigger warnings: Ed's,cursing and emotional/ verbal abuse. If I missed any let me know :)
You have always struggled with your body. So many people in your life telling you you need to loose weight, that no one will want you if you look like that. And you believed them. You've been best friends with JJ since kindergarten when he helped you build a sandcastle at the beach. And you've had a crush on JJ since you were 10. Once you were older you saw the people JJ hooked up with and you knew what his type was, not you. You knew the looks JJ gave those skinny blond girls with big boobs and giant asses at the beach. Looks that he would never give you, that no one would ever give you.
𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘄𝗮𝗶𝘀𝘁
𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘀𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗲
𝗦𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼'𝘀 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗸 𝗱𝗮𝘆
𝗜𝗻 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗱𝗮𝗱'𝘀 𝗻𝗲𝘄 𝗰𝗮𝗿
Your mom has recently lost her job and has been taking her anger out on you. "YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT" she yelled "WHY DO YOU EAT EVERY GODDAMN THING" "CAN YOU STOP EATING FOR ONE SECOND FATASS" and so you did. JJ obviously took notice so you only ate around him and the pogues. And when you did it wasn't a lot.
𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝗲 𝗜 𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗼𝘂𝘁
𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗱
𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗜 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗴𝗼𝘁 𝗮 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻
𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗻 𝘂𝗴𝗹𝘆 𝘀𝗰𝗮𝗿
"Y/n" .... "Y/n" ..... "Y/N" JJ yelled "what" you asked as you flinched because of his yelling. Your mom had yelled at you right before you left for John B's and it's put you on edge. "I asked if you were gonna eat. You haven't been eating much lately" he asked again concern evident in his voice"Oh umm no I'm feeling a little nauseous" you said, a lie to make sure he didn't get suspicious.But JJ knew, he always knew. You haven't been eating the same for the past few months and even though you thought you were doing a good job at hiding it all of the pogues noticed it. "Are you okay, you've never gotten sea sick" Pope asked concerned finally being the first one to talk about this to you. The pogues have talked about this before and came to their own conclusions that scared them. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be" you said confused as you raised and eyebrow at Pope. "I mean you haven't eaten anything all day. You've kept your oversised t-shirt on and it's hot as hell out here" John B said now listing the things you didn't want them to notice.
𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝘀𝗵���'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗿𝘆 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁
𝗪𝗵𝘆'𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗲𝘆𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗮𝗶𝗱 𝗶𝘁 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝘂𝗱
"Yes I'm fine" you said sternly implying that you were done with the conversation. "John B I think it's time to go back" JJ said looking at you and giving him a look. John B nodded in agreement and started to turn the boat around. As you all got off the boat and onto the grass you went to check your phone and saw you had missed calls from your mom. 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵. 'Ring' 'ring' "OH NOW YOU ANSWER" your mom yells through the phone. "Umm sorry we went for a boat ride and I didn't see your missed calls till now. I'm sorry" you said fast so you didn't annoy her. What you didn't know was why you were busy talking to your mom the pogues could see and hear everything. "HA. YOU ON A BOAT IN A BATHING SUIT NOW I WOULD PAY MONEY TO SEE THAT" her words hurt as they were shout through the phone and tears prickled your eyes. You were thinking the exact same thing as she was when you looked at yourself in the mirror with your bikini on and that's why you wore your shirt over it the whole time. "I NEED YOU HOME RIGHT NOW. I WOULD TELL YOU TO BRING SOMETHING HOME FOR DINNER BUT WE DON'T NEED YOU BREAKING ANOTHER CHAIR" she laughed through the phone. Now tears were about to spill so you quickly said an okay and "I'll be there soon" and hung up. "My mom needs me home so I'm leaving" you said keeping your face down as you went to grab your backpack because you were pretty sure if tears haven't already slipped they definitely would when you look one of your friends in the eyes. "Hey, you okay?" JJ asked as he grabbe your arm. "Mhm" you said shakily. The rest of the pogues watched as you tried not to break down. You left as soon as JJ let go on you arm and on your way back home you broke down and cried.
𝗦𝘁𝘂𝗽𝗶𝗱 𝗯𝗼𝘆 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗲 𝘀𝗼 𝘀𝗮𝗱
𝗗𝗶𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗳𝗮𝘀𝘁
𝗦𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲
𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗜 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗲𝘁𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁
"OH THERE SHE IS" "FINALLY MAKING AN APPEARANCE YOUR HIGHNASS" she yells at you. "Sorry" you mumble. "WELL I'M GOING OUT AND WHEN I GET BACK THIS PLACE BETTER BE SPOTLESS" she yells out the door. You nod your head and make your way to the kitchen where the cleaning supplies is. "I know you'll go and change your mind. One day wake up and be bored with mine. She's got everything that I don't have. And she's all I wanna be. All I wanna be so bad. So bad. She's got everything that I don't have." Tate McRae sang through your earbuds as you scrubbed the counter and table. Someone tapping your shoulder cut you out of your cleaning trance. You hopped it wasn't your mom she was never home with early. "If you're someone here to kill me. Just do it now please." you said kinda desperate. As you turned around expecting to find a crazed murderer you instead found all the pogues with a worried expression throughout their faces. "Umm we're not a crazed murderer but we are worried about you" JJ said. "Oh um it's just I didn't do my chores before I left and my mom wanted me to do them so yeah. Sorry for leaving" JJ recognized that look of fear that someone would get suspicious of you. "Does your mom hit you" he said out right and no hesitation "what no" you stuttered, she didn't physically abuse you but words were definitely shared. "We heard her through the phone before you left" Pope said now joining in on the conversation.
𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝗼𝗳𝗳
𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝗼 𝗼𝘂𝘁
𝗦𝗵𝗲'𝗹𝗹 𝘄𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗮 𝘁𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗶 𝗯𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗱𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀
𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱
It was just too much anymore and you dropped to your knees but JJ caught you, He always does. "She-she says I eat too much. That no one will love me. I'm useless JJ" you cried into his shirt as all of your thoughts about yourself spilled out. You didn't care that JJ and the pogues would hear what you thought about yourself, you didn't care anymore. "I have stretch marks everywhere and my stomach rolls when I sit down. I'm not like those beautiful blond skinny girls on the beach that you flirt with or bring home. I'll never be good enough"
𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗹𝗹 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗯𝗮𝗯𝗹𝘆 𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗮𝘁
𝗛𝗲𝗿 𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝗯𝗶𝗴 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲
𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗯𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗜'𝗹𝗹 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲
𝗬𝗼𝘂'𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁
"Hey, hey shushhh" JJ soothed as you continued to cry into his shoulder. "Look at me" you didn't. So he made you. He grabbed the side of your face with his hands gently. "You are 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁 and 𝗯𝗲𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗳𝘂𝗹 and 𝗵𝗼𝘁 and 𝘀𝗲𝘅𝘆 and have an amazing 𝘀𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗲 okay? Don't even get me started on your 𝗹𝗮𝘂𝗴𝗵" he said listening all of the physical traits that he loves of you. " And your 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱 and 𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗲𝘁 and 𝗳𝘂𝗻𝗻𝘆 and so 𝗳𝘂𝗻 when your 𝗱𝗿𝘂𝗻𝗸 or 𝗵𝗶𝗴𝗵 off your ass" he continued. "You are 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 and 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗲 could ask for, so don't you dare believe what she says about you because it's not true" "it's not true baby, it's not true" he soothed as your cries became less "I'm sorry" you sniffled " don't be baby, just sit here and it will okay. You have nothing to apologize for." he rocked you two back and forth for a while. The pogues left after you fell asleep in JJ's arms and he told them to go back.
𝗦𝘁𝘂𝗼𝗶𝗱 𝗯𝗼𝘆 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝗲 𝘀𝗼 𝘀𝗮𝗱
𝗗𝗶𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗶𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗳𝗮𝘀𝘁
𝗦𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲
𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗜 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗲𝘁𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁
𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗹𝗹 𝗴𝗼 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗱
𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝘄𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘂𝗽 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗯𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗲
𝗦𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲
𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗯𝗲
When you woke up you were still in JJ's arms and he was still rocking you back and forth. "Thank you JJ for being there for me" you said softly "I always will be baby" he said. 𝙃𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚.
𝗦𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲
𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗯𝗲
𝗔𝗹𝗹 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗯𝗲
𝗦𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗮 𝗯𝗲 𝘀𝗼 𝗯𝗮𝗱
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wetbananapeel · 2 months
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I'm going to talk about my body in a vulnerable way because I've been having a lot of thoughts and just want to empty them out.
I've lost well over 110lbs and that is a wild concept to me because I don't always /feel/ like I have. I don't always notice the change in my body as I'm living in it. It's not until I see pictures from last year or if someone comments on it that it makes me realize how different I actually look. I still think I can fit into my old clothes; today even I tried a pair of old pants on cause my pair of fitting jeans had vomit on them (another story for another time) but it was absolutely redundant. There was no way I could have made them work. And that's so frustrating!!
I can't really afford to get an entirely new wardrobe, and I need an entirely new wardrobe because most of my things, including undergarments, don't fit. People treat me a lot differently now. They speak to me differently. There's been a noticeable shift and that one is really hard to get used to and sucks. People dear to me treat me differently and that hurts cause I've always been here. I've always existed in this frame.
My body visually looks and is shaped differently now in ways I wouldn't have predicted or expected. Some of the changes are hard to adjust to. I'm ripply with stretch marks covering most of me. I'm saggy also. Very saggy in many places. I have so much loose skin and sometimes that is a hindrance when I'm vigorously moving my body. Sometimes my loose skin hurts if I jump around too hard. I want to get compression clothing to help with that. I have a few varicose veins in my legs that are a tad lumpy and make me nervous when I run my fingers over them. My chest has gotten smaller and that makes me feel more proportionate and comfortable. My stomach skin droops down a few inches away from my body if I'm over someone. I'm frustrated cause I planned to get tattoos but some of the areas I wanted, I know ink wouldn't do well in because of saggy skin, stretch marks, and veins.
I've noticed I have my dad's body structure more than my mom's. I'm not sure how to feel about that one and feel many different things. I'm proportionally built like my father and have wider shoulders. My biceps look jacked now because I carry so much shit with me in the city all the time. I try to take all my groceries in one trip even when I have to park three blocks away from my apartment. I feel a lot stronger, and I like that. I like being strong because I can use that to help others. I was able to help a woman carry a metal bed frame up three flights of stairs. I can now take four flights of stairs without getting winded. I try to take six flights just in case I need to at some point.
I try to move my body in just about any way I can now. I like physical tasks for hours on end. I like to feel it and to get really sweaty and hot. I like to run in the city and try to dodge cars and people. I've noticed I have gained mobility in a few areas and that surprises me a lot sometimes. I love to dance. When I dance typically I approach multiple hours before I take a break. I want to get better at squats, but my knees are my weakest point now and I have more issues than I would like with them. They crunch and actually make sounds and hurt and so I try to take it easy on my knees.
Oughh. One thing that kills me about me losing weight is my rings don't fit and I'm so sad about that. They keep falling off and I have stopped wearing many of them for that reason. They were never anything valuable, so I can't even melt them down to resize them either, but I'm sad over the sentimental loss.
I get so cold all the time now. I think a deep chill has seeped into my bones from this winter, but indoors I still need jackets cause I'm cold. I think I want to get a heated blanket.
I know that change is inevitable, and my body will never stay static during my lifetime, especially as I age, but the change adjustments sometimes don't always feel great. There are good and bad things I've found from losing this amount of weight, I'm working on neutrality for the things I don't like.
Being fat, thin, gaining or losing weight, and having things like loose skin, stretch marks, and veins are all natural and neutral and human. I'm working to just accept my body as it appears to me. It's just hardddd. Losing weight doesn't make me accept my body, it just gives me other things to focus on. So the work is in acceptance. GAH!
I try to celebrate what my body can do for me and the ways in which I experience and feel it. I've noticed far more about what it can do now that I have been paying better attention to things. I don't feel invincible much these days and I'm coming to terms that this is the body I will reside in for the rest of my life. I have to work to preserve it. I feel like I'm returning home to myself.
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acethatlovesdinos · 5 months
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Tw: vent, female body dysmorphia? (Idk I don't have an official diagnosis). description of feminine anatomy (boobs). I'm not asking for pity, I'm just spitting words out because I feel the need to make them known. A confession, of sorts. And maybe it'll help some of you feel less alone in your own journey.
~~~~~~
I'm not pretty.
I'm aware of the fact. Never really have been. Not exactly the textbook definition of "attractive" when I look in the mirror.
I dont feel unloved, I think that's a different thing. I know i have caring friends and family who have my back, but it's still not quite what Im getting at.
I hate mirrors. Specifically the big ones in the bathroom before I shower. I look at myself, my eyes taking in every flaw.
I used to be bigger, you see, and I do feel much better having lost a significant amount of weight but that in itself brought upon an entirely new type of insecurity.
At least when I was a larger size my shape was "normal," per se, in that i expected and understood that physique well.
I had gotten a gastric sleeve surgery (make stomach smaller so you can absorb less food, thus losing weight in a more "natural" manner). Considering my morbidly obese state at the time, it was a necessary adjustment for the sake of my own health.
Dont get me wrong, I'm happy with what I've done. It's been a massive change and I feel so much better from both a physical and mental perspective.
but oh boy, I never could have expected the kind of insecurity that accompanied rapid weightloss.
it was incredible for a while, watching my clothes fit looser and feeling like I had more energy. my mental health improved drastically. truly, this was one of the best decisions I ever made, and I dont think Id change it if given the chance. I do want to make that clear, my current feelings are just a bit of a side effect.
quickly shedding pounds means that your body doesnt really get a chance to re-absorb that loose skin. what once was round, fatty pudge has now become loose, dangling flab. it hangs over my waist, accentuating my gut and making it still look larger than it is. Unfortunately, the weight I've lost isnt enough to properly constitute those surgeries to remove the loose skin that exists, so I'm sort of just...stuck with it. Im still certainly not skinny by any means, but I feel as though I'd be a size or two smaller if that extra flab wasn't there.
My hips and thighs didnt change a whole lot, so I remain with a bottom-heavy, pear shaped form with a waist several inches behind my hips. pants are a struggle to find a comfortable fit as a result.
It doesnt really strike much thought at first, but I was pretty quick to remember that breasts are composed mostly of fat and soft tissue. One of the first places to start showing a decrease in size? yeah. My chest wasn't particularly huge in proportion to my body anyway, and they only got smaller. that's a blow to the self-esteem if ive ever seen one. ever try shopping for a 40A bra? they aren't very common.
Oh, and what I said before about loose skin? that applies there too. there's no shape, it just sort of...sags pathetically. it could almost be compared to the "boobs" of an obese man with the way they sit, and the thought disgusts me.
all in all im sagging, loose, and not what someone would call a pretty sight...ever. It makes me fear the longevity and even possibility of future relationships, because who would want something like this?
my only saving grace is when I take a closer look at myself. Look closer in the mirror, look at my face. that seems to be the only part of myself im mostly okay with.
I've got a soft, round face, dusted with a natural blush and a gentle chin. my ears arent too big, and ive got a little dimple when my mouth moves the right way.
pale blue eyes provide the only pop of color on my otherwise pale, boring body, a cloudy shade of slate with a ring of green around the pupil. I dont want to sound basic, bit they really do seem to change under the sun. hooded eyelids occasionally cause makeup to be frustrating, but i only wear the stuff on special occasions anyway so it's not exactly a huge deal for me.
My glasses help to frame my face, a cute but necessary prop(bc i am blind lol), with the added bonus of helping to hide the tired circles under my eyes.
A lot of people seem insecure about their noses, but mine has been mostly unproblematic throughout my experience with it.
I've had a surprising number of people comment on my "perfect lips" (a few ladies who helped me with makeup), bringing up the defined Cupid's Bow and naturally plump shape, a soft pink hue that exists all on its own. I never really thought much of it until someone told me.
My hair has always been a fickle thing, and I've had a bit if a love-hate relationship with it until fairly recently. I've found that I like it bobbed at my chin, where its light enough that the natural curls can have a strong effect. the most product I tend to use is this nice-smelling leave-in conditioner, which just helps to tone down the frizziness. I love the way the curls frame my chin and jawline, and it coils into these thick, beautiful springs after it dries from a shower. it's so soft and I love to run my fingers through it when it's been freshly cleaned. The current color is a dark purple, that looks almost black indoors, but it nearly lights up when the sun hits it. its natural color is a deep brown, and i still do like it, I just thought a bit of color would be nice for once.
Ive got moles and marks everywhere, but that's never bothered me. the little brown spots are fun, and a few of them on my arm can even be traced into a perfect arch.
the most unique aspect of my appearance is this...little patch of tiny moles in the center of my throat. The patch is only about a centimeter in full area, and it's covered in little raised brown bumps. Oddly enough, this part of my body has never been something I felt ashamed of, as the little patch of marks were one of the many things that made me, me.
So maybe my body isnt perfect. it's not the ideal shape, nor size, nor whatever else, but I guess there's some things about it that I dont mind so much.
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bandit-prince · 1 year
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I’m thinking a LOT about my dnd character, Goose.
I think it’s because I put a lot of myself into him, but he’s by far one of my favorite characters I’ve ever made.
Raised in a noble family he was always made to believe that he would be some great hero, and do great things in the world. But, as he grew up, he found the weight of his parents expectations unbearable. He became the town fuck up. Trying desperately to prove himself, but keeping his guard up so much that he’d lash out at people, and often loose whatever job his mother had managed to get him.
So finally, he turns to his mother’s Order of Tymora, a group of paladins and clerics. And he takes an oath, as a paladin to Tymora, but his heart just isn’t in it. It’s just what he’s expected to do.
He was sent on a quest to cleanse an old church out in the wild lands beyond Waterdeep. And, just when he thinks he’s going to succeed, he dies. And something makes a bargain with him. Freedom, a new chance at life, in exchange for service.
And so, Goose returns. Different, but still under the guise as a Paladin. He starts getting dreams. He brushes them off as adjusting to his new job in the town guard.
And then he meets this group of adventurers. True adventures, going after a lost treasure. And he saves one of them from poison, on a whim.
He helps them out, goes with them when they have to fight a red dragon.
And he and a close friend are turned to ashes from the dragon’s final breath, while trying to protect their friends from the same fate.
They both arrive in Death’s realm, at a little bar in the snowy woods. And Death is very kind to both of them. He makes them feel at home, and tells them the rules: “You can stay as long as you’d like, but when you’re ready, tell me, and you can move on. But, if you’d like another chance at life, we can play a game. If you win, you return to the world of the Living. If you fail, you remain here. You only get this chance once, use it wisely.”
Goose, feeling downtrodden and lost, teeters back and forth on wether or not he should go back. No one would miss him, right? He was just some punk kid.
But, Death is much kinder then Life. And he takes the young paladin by the shoulders, and props him back up. “I see much strength in you. Your friends would be lost without you. You have proven your strength to others, now prove it to yourself.”
So, Goose decides to agree to a game. Hide and seek, he says, is a game he’s been good at for years. Death is quick to agree, as no one has ever asked for that game before. Death hands Goose his sword, and even though the dark wood mask covered Death’s face, Goose could tell he was intrigued.
“You can win in two ways. If I cannot find you before the time is up, you will win. And if you land a single blow on me, you will win. But if I find you, if I hit you with my scythe, that’s that.”
Goose was quick to learn that you cannot hide from Death. He will find you, eventually. And so, leaping from his hiding place, he landed a single blow on Death’s arm. And Death smiled.
“You have threads connected to you. When you return to the world of the Living the threads will fall, and you will start anew. No more bad dreams, eh?”
Goose didn’t know what to make of it.
“But, before you go, I have an offer to make.” And he extended a black ring to the paladin.
“I could be your patron. Rather then some unknown evil. There are some things that I will need done, but, it’s nothing evil. It just, needs to happen.”
Goose was quick to agree, taking the ring with a smile. “Thank you.” He says.
And Death smiled in return. “Thank you, for the good game.”
Just. Look, I find it so wonderful that both times, he was reborn through death. And both times someone looked at the stubborn, hard headed kid, and decided “Hm, you should live, actually.”
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wanderrlust0 · 2 years
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i lost like 5 lbs and i like it .. i think i can stay this weight for the summer and i can wear certain clothes without constantly looking down and feeling like i look fat. like today, i could tell that i felt more comfortable than i usually am in my outfit, like it felt great and i didn’t feel that insecure. sometimes im always making sure my shirt covers a certain amount of my stomach bc i’ll soon feel like im bloated. i love wearing high waisted shorts/skirts/pants; theyre like one of the best things to exist lol. i wasn’t trying to lose weight on purpose, it just sorta happened under certain circumstances. i also know that my body kind of loses weight easily, like if i eat any less than my normal at the moment, i will automatically see a difference. sometimes i just dont like my body proportions. like, my upper arms feel fat and i dont like that crease at the armpits. im always on and off about my calves bothering me. i do like my hips a lot; i like feeling my hip bone. i like my waist bc it curves in. im pretty neutral about my ass lol i think the size of it fits my body and im not really into having such a huge butt. i used to like hate my boobs so much. i just didnt like them. i didnt like how small they looked compared to other girls i would see. i felt like no guy would want a girl like me with small boobs. i pretty much fell for societys standards or the male gaze with what the “perfect” female body is and id look at my chest and it would feel so flat. foreal in high school i wanted a boob job in the future like your girl just wanted boobies. i still get insecure about them but defff not to the extent that i used to. i used to care so much and now ive gotten more comfortable, but i do sometimes think like damn why cant any gained fat just all go to my tits lol. when i had my after hs “glow up” and felt prettier, there were more guys liking me during college and i put myself more out there and that honestly helped. im just rambling now. anyways, my bf loves my boobs and whenever he’s admiring them and expressing how much he likes them it just makes me happy and my past self needed to hear that sooner. going deeper into it, i feel like this is the root of me being attracted to girls. like i would see a girl with my ideal body type and boobs just bigger than mine and i wanted that bc i felt like that was part of being pretty. ive been admiring girls for so long but i didnt even realize the extent of it and what it meant since i focused on boy crushes in school. i had a lot of female celebrities that i liked; i just thought they were perfect and i wanted to be them. omg on that note, im very glad that i no longer have thoughts where i wish i was white. i cant believe i even thought of what i wanted to look like. i hated my eyes, my nose, my side profile. i’ve gained more acceptance to my facial features (still not a fan of my side profile tho lol). ive embraced being asian and i dont feel any internal racism anymore. also, middle school/hs can really ruin your confidence and i feel like its inevitable for everyone. anyways, another thing i like are my collar bones and that whole part of my body. very minuscule, but i like my wrists. i would wrap my fingers around them and try each finger to figure out their size and go up my arm until my fingers couldnt touch. during college is when i noticed my body changing more. i was losing more fat and some to me felt like baby fat. so i noticed my wrists getting smaller and looking more dainty and flat, like how i wanted. even my fingers shrunk. towards the second half of college, i would put on rings id wear a lot and they became loose more often and like now, they completely slide on my finger. in hs i thought my fingers looked so chubby and my ring size felt too big. anyways, ill finish and stop rambling now but its kind of eye opening typing all of this out. ive also been writing my thoughts wayyy more often on here. years back i never posted a text post and i barely posted my own pics too, so ive been using my “blog” to write and post more original stuff // 7.22.22
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duskholland · 3 years
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Settle || Mob!Tom Smut
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summary ↠ distance may make the heart grow fonder, but you’d spend every day by tom’s side if you could. warnings ↠ a bit of angst, and this is just.... so fucking smutty.... pwp but make it 8k of smut... 18+ minors dni !!!!!!!!!!! extended nsfw warnings below the cut <3 word count ↠ 11.7k. a/n ↠ lads... lost my mind I’ve lost it. the mob!tom energy has been absolutely overwhelming for the last month, and this has been a long time coming. thank you esquire. thank you gq. thanks tom too, I guess, even though his handsomeness is a double-edged sword. also thanks to chloe for motivating me to write this lmao. this was a lot of fun!! softness sweetness debased animalistic crazy stuff. we love to see it. lmk what you think !! <3 ***this is a part of my mob!tom series – a collection of oneshots set within the same universe. you don’t need to read the other parts for this to make sense! 
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
extended warnings ↠ praise kink, breeding kink, cockwarming, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, crying, biting, spitting, oral + fingering (fem receiving), unprotected sex (the long-awaited return of cum-dumpster!reader), minor d/s dynamics ft soft!dom!tom, possessiveness in the dirty talk, and I wouldn’t say it’s degradation but there is some patronisation lmao. this is intense loving passionate consuming smut, esp the second section. pls practice safe sex irl x
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
✧ *:・゚SETTLE・゚:*✧
Tom is wrapped around you, his rich scent overpowering each one of your senses. He consumes you. He becomes you.
With your face buried in the crook of his neck and your legs swung either side of his thighs, you’re clinging tightly to him. One of his hands rests beneath the shirt on your back, the tips of his fingers slowly stroking up and down your spine, and you can feel the firm press of his nose against the side of your head. His face nestles against your hair as he holds you to the warm skin of his neck. Every few minutes, Tom pulls away from the documents and spreadsheets resting on his desk and litters the side of your temple with short kisses.
There’s a persistent throbbing between your legs, but it’s worth it. Tom’s cock is buried inside you, his length enveloped by your silky heat. You can feel him, bearing in on every intimate space of your cunt. In your aroused state, you swear you can make out the lines of his bulbous head and the curves of his veins as they press up against your sensitive walls. You’re pulsing—every slight movement made by either you or him causing you to gasp softly and cling closer to your boyfriend.
“God, darling,” Tom murmurs, accented voice hanging low and heavy. He strokes over your back again, and you hear him click his ballpoint pen. When he tosses the heavy metal object back onto the desk, he sits back in the wide office chair that the two of you are precariously balanced on. You aren’t scared of falling off—you’ve done this before, countless times. You know that he’s got you. “So fuckin’ snug, aren’t you?”
You pull away from your boyfriend’s neck, sucking in a rough breath as you sit up to face him and receive the lightest of friction against your g-spot. As your teeth dig into your lower lip, you take a few moments to admire his ensemble—light white shirt, unbuttoned and hanging open, a delicate silver chain dangling over the golden expanse of his chest. He’s got his rings stacked over his fingers, and the bright metal pieces catch in your hair as he smoothes a hand across your cheek.
Tom smirks at you, his deep brown eyes flooded with lusting appreciation. With one hand on your face, the other slowly slides down your back, drifting over the loose shirt that covers your figure until it disappears between your legs. You cry out as his index finger reaches down to play with your clit, still wet and sensitive from his exploration earlier. He’d opened you up on his tongue before sheathing himself inside you.
“You just got so tight, angel,” he murmurs, voice raspy. “Do you like when I show you a bit of attention?”
“Yeah,” you whimper. You can barely keep your eyes open as he continues to toy with your bud. It’s hard to push down the temptation to start riding him, but you know that’s not the point of this. As much as you crave release and the opportunity to fall apart whilst being encompassed by Tom, there are other objectives at play. “I’ll miss this,” you admit. “I’ll miss you.”
“I know, my darling.” Tom’s expression briefly clouds over, some of the heat leaving his eyes. He rolls the pad of his thumb across your cheekbone, a gentle pout curling across his lower lip. “I don’t want to leave you.”
You lick your lower lip, pushing back the hot lump of emotion that simmers in your chest. All week, you’ve felt apprehensive for his departure, anticipating today with unease. Tom is a good businessman, and usually he’s able to control his own empire from the comfort of his West London mansion. For so long, he’s been near you, lingering close, never trailing too far from your side. But there’s uncertainty in the air, and they need him out in Manchester for a few weeks to whip the boys back into shape. Until the supply issue is resolved, he’ll be away—away from you, and your bed, and the life that you’ve constructed so precariously together.
In this world of drugs and darkness, nothing is certain. You fall asleep beside Tom each night thankful that he’s safe, he’s here, he’s content. You know plenty of people who haven’t been afforded such a luxury. Your boyfriend has enemies who seek revenge and retribution, and their greedy eyes follow him from every direction. They’re like wolves, every single one of them—suppliers, rivals, the law—waiting in the shadows, preparing to pounce at the first sign of weakness.
You shouldn’t love him. He’s not a good man. Tom has told you as much repeatedly—in his deprecating words, in the underhanded dealings that go on around your dinner table, through his violent actions against opponents. But he loves you, and he is a good man, to you, and maybe that’s all that matters. Maybe you can take the pain and the darkness, because it affords you a glimmer of light in the form of your boyfriend. Tom holds you at the very centre of his universe, and as he cups your face in a gentle hand and coaxes you in for a sweet kiss, you know you wouldn’t have it any other way. Your life may be characterised by uncertainty, but there is no doubt in the way that he loves you, so recklessly and fiercely. He gives you everything that he has without hesitation.
The kiss grows deeper, and you moan into Tom as he presses his tongue into your mouth. He’s still rolling your clit beneath his thumb, and you reach up to grab fistfuls of his hair. When he’d pulled you into the office earlier and begged you to spend time with him, it’d come with the caveat that you need not distract him from his final pieces of work. He seems to have abandoned that decision now, as he ruts up into you when you groan into his mouth.
“Sweet love,” he purrs, voice darker. Tom squeezes your cheek, the cool metal of his ring pressing to your skin as he holds you tightly. He releases your face a moment later, fingers shifting to your waist as his lips grace over the tender part of your face. “God, I’ll miss you. Miss this fuckin’ cunt.” He kisses down from your cheek, shifting back and towards your ear. You release a wispy moan as he finds your tender spot, sucking harshly against the skin then soothing the ache with his hot tongue. “So perfect for me.”
“You’re perfect,” you murmur, mind slow. Tom holds your hip slowly and encourages you to move, and both of you release sounds of enjoyment as you begin to ride him. Your entrance aches, stretched wide around his girth, but as his finger rubs persistent circles across your bud, it soothes into pleasure. “Fuck, Tom… You fill me up completely. You’re in so deep.”
“I know, darling,” he murmurs. When you toss your head back and start to move faster, he’s quick to attach his lips to your neck. “Tightest little thing,” he adds, voice scalding against your ear. “I know I’ll be dreaming of you, angel. Every single night.”
You cry out as he helps you shift slightly to the side, optimising your pleasure. As the crown of Tom’s cock rubs up against your back wall, you shudder, breath hitching. The sounds of your heat, so wet and silky, being fucked repeatedly as you come down on him again and again spurs you on. It grows wild quickly, Tom leaving your neck and sitting back in his chair just to watch you ride him so perfectly. His eyes are dark and passionate, and his gaze so intense that it’s as if he’s trying to burn the memory to mind.
“I don’t think I can hold it,” you admit, eyes threatening to roll back. After sitting on his cock for fifteen minutes, you were already riled up. Now, you’re on cloud nine. Pleasure has your toes curling, the muscles in your thighs tensing and straining as you cling to the back of Tom’s head and tug on his curls. “T-Tom.”
“That’s it, gorgeous. Say my name.”
His ring digs into your side, spurring you on. As the cool metal nicks at your skin, the coil in your stomach tightens further.
“Oh,” you moan, eyes fluttering shut. No longer able to see Tom’s handsome face, you’re left only with the sensations, pulsing out from your centre. You’re on the verge, inching closer with every time Tom pulls you back onto his cock. He works you open, thrusts into you deep, leaves you gasping.
“C’mon, pretty baby,” he murmurs, hot lips moving forward to press at your neck. “Make me cum. I know you want it, don’t you?”
A throaty groan travels past your lips as you know exactly what he’s talking about. You’d stopped taking birth control a week ago, and though both of you know that the chances of you falling pregnant so soon after ending those hormones are slim, the possibility is there. Sex now feels dangerous, the extra weight to it filling you with arousal and excitement.
“Yes,” you whimper. “Please.”
Tom nips at your ear, the bite of pain making you moan.
“Go on,” he coos, voice sweet, sultry. “I’m going to fill you up, darling. Give you something to remember me by.” His hand slips from his waist and travels to your lower stomach, resting there. “Right here,” he adds. “Do you want it, love? You need to work for it. Cum on my cock, mm? Let me feel how desperate your tight little pussy is for my cum.”
Tom snaps his hips up to yours, and a few moments later, you peak. Your climax burns through you, your walls clamping down around his length in a way that makes him groan loudly. You open your eyes to watch his face seize up, freezing with pleasure and enjoyment as his jaw tenses and his eyes squeeze shut. You feel his cock pulsing as you continue to move over him, lost in the pleasure that spirals out from your cunt and your clit. His pants are laboured too.
When you come down from it, you settle in his lap, sweaty palms grasping at his face. Tom pulls you closer, wrapping you up in his arms as he presses his forehead to yours. His nose bumps against yours, tip warm. Every part of him is warm.
“I love you so much,” he says, voice serious. “More than you could ever imagine, Y/N.”
You smile. “I love you too,” you whisper.
Tom pulls back from you to pepper his lips across your face, dusting every inch of your skin with his mouth. You’re still connected at your centre, and you know the moment you stand, you’ll feel the evidence of his love dripping down your thighs.
“I—”
A rough knocking sound bursts into the room, hard knuckles drumming over the office door. You jump, and Tom’s brows crease. He brings both of his hands to cover your ears and kisses the tip of your nose before sitting up a little straighter.
“What the fuck do you want?” he hollers, voice terse. He’s muffling the volume with his palms, but you still wince, and he kisses your nose again in penance.
“Sir, we have to go. The men are waiting—”
Tom’s face ripples with irritation. You watch the vein stand out in his neck, fading only when his eyes sweep back to your face. He deflates as he brings his lips down across your forehead.
“I’ll be two minutes,” he barks back. “Now piss off. I’m with my girl.”
“Yes, sir.”
Tom peels his hands away from your ears, then rubs each one of your earlobes with the soft pads of his thumbs. “Sorry about that, my darling,” he mumbles, shadows covering his features. His teeth dig into his lower lip as he sighs. “I need to go.”
You feel your face fall, and break eye contact when the intensity of his gaze grows too much. “Okay,” you mumble.
“Hey.” Tom grasps your chin between his index and his middle finger. “I’ll come back to you,” he promises. You know he can feel your reluctance to let him go, can see it on your face without you having to verbalise it. You wonder if he’s been able to tell how unsettled you feel about the whole ordeal, and if maybe that’s why he’s let you be more clingy this week.
“What if you don’t?” you breathe out, unable to keep it in. You blink a few times, trying to hide the watery film of tears that shakes across your eyes. “What if something happens to you whilst you’re away, and you don’t come home?” You reach down and grab at his shirt, clenching your knuckles around the crisp material. “Tom, you are my home. I don’t know what I’ll do if—”
“I’ll come back, baby.” He kisses you softly, a few fingers brushing up beneath your chin and tilting you to him. “I always will. I promise. I’m a man of my word, so you know that’s true.”
You manage a thin smile, heart aching even as Tom cups your face in his hands. “I love you,” you say finally. “And I’ll be waiting for you to get back.”
Tom nods. His cheeks are still flushed, and his hair is a mess, but the fire in his eyes is undeniable. When he deposits a light kiss to your cheek and then lets his lips brush you against your earlobe, you know that he’ll be back. You know he’d never fail you.
“I’ll be back before you know it.”
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
A month passes. You miss Tom desperately.
For the first three weeks, you manage to control the sadness in your chest. Finding distraction in your job and your friends, you’re able to forget about the giant Tom-shaped hole in your heart. He lingers on, though, his love persistent even in his absence. Despite finding certain ways to limit your anguish, like daily calls, and soaking your wrists in his cologne each morning, the time only worsens your heartache. You’re miserable without him.
In the fourth week, it reaches the point where you can no longer pretend you aren’t aching for him. You miss him in a way you’ve never felt before, his absence from your home like a sharp spire ever-present in your chest, burrowing deeper every lonely morning. Tom can’t ease you, doesn’t know himself when he’ll be able to come home. The job he’s had to do has spiralled, with mutinous men and delayed shipments, and it’s in too precarious a position for him to leave and come back to you. When you’d suggested visiting, he’d immediately wiped that option from the table, citing the acts of violence and uneven atmosphere as too great a risk to take. You understand it, but you miss him, and it permeates every part of your life.
It’s late Tuesday night, and in a fitless trance, you find yourself walking up to the third floor of the mansion. When you’d moved in, almost a year ago, Tom had tried to make you feel as comfortable as possible. In his efforts, he’d installed an art studio for you to use. The gesture went in tandem with his greatest gift to you so far—your very own art gallery, right in the centre of London. The studio is a large room, framed with huge windows which overlook the sprawling estate. Tonight, all you can make out is the dim driveway and the crescent moon, hanging thinly in the sky.
After turning on some music and slipping on your painting apron, you take your place in front of your easel. As you stare at the blank canvas, your fingers shift up to absently run the line of Tom’s ring. It hangs on a chain around your neck, silver and bold. You hadn’t realised that he’d left it with you until you’d reached into your pocket the day of his departure and found it sitting there. You know the matching ring stays wrapped around his pinky finger, and it brings you a sense of comfort to trace the smooth band and feel connected to him, even in a small way.
You decide to paint Tom, trying to coax him to life from your memories. Shades of gold and brown take form over your canvas. With every brush stroke and flick of your wrist, you feel lighter, some of the ache lessening.
Hours pass, interrupted only by the ringing of your phone. Biting back a small curse word as you feel your concentration shatter, you put your paintbrush down and tug your phone from your back pocket. Your frown fades as you see Tom’s name, flashing on the screen besides an image of his face.
“T,” you greet, the relief in your voice obvious even to you. “Hey.”
There’s silence for a few moments, then his voice crackles down the line. “Hi, darling,” Tom speaks. “It’s not too late to talk, is it?”
You glance up at the ornate clock sitting on the wall. The feature is grand and solid gold, matching the themes of the rest of his house. Tom likes decadence. His luxurious touch is evident in the patterns of red, black, and metals that cling to each article of furniture. When you see that it’s 2am, you blink a few times, shaking off your surprise as you realise how much time has passed since you’d started to paint.
“It’s okay,” you reply. “I’m painting.”
“Ahhh.” You hear the rustling of sheets, and you imagine Tom in bed. He’s probably bundled up in sweats and a hoodie, sprawled out across his mattress. The house in Manchester always runs cold, and you’ve heard his complaints consistently for the last few weeks. The image of him resting up against the headboard, pouting from beneath a pile of blankets makes you smile. “What are you working on?”
You smile into your phone, stepping back to admire your handiwork. “You,” you tell him. “Just your eyes at the moment, and the outline of your hair.”
“Me again?” Tom speaks, and his tone is like soft velvet, gentle and crushing at the edges. “I’m flattered, darling.”
“Mmm.” You fiddle with his ring. “I’ll need to dedicate a wall to you in the gallery. You’re my favourite muse.”
Tom chuckles. “That’d be an honour,” he says, voice dropping in volume. “It’s a privilege to be loved by you.” His voice twangs sadly, and you feel yourself frowning.
“Are you okay, baby?”
He’s quiet for a few moments. You find yourself biting your lip.
“Yeah,” he says, voice thicker. “Long day.”
“What did you do?”
He sucks in a harsh breath, air catching on the back of his teeth. “Can we just talk about you for a minute?”
Worry furrows your brow. “Okay,” you say, drawing out the syllable as you scramble for words to fill the gap. “Today I visited your mother.”
“Oh?”
“She wanted me to show her how I made those biscuits, from your birthday last year?” You pause until he makes a noise of recognition. “Ended up staying there for a while, had some tea. Gossiped about you.”
Tom snorts. “Learn anything good?”
“Only that you were just as much of a terror as a child,” you reply. “She sent me photos. I’ll text them to you later.”
It’d been a sobering experience to see Tom so animated and innocent as a child, but you don’t tell him that. So much as changed since he was seven and running through a field with his brothers. He has lost more than you could ever fathom.
“Did she show you the one with my head half shaved?”
You laugh. “Yeah,” you say, smiling against the phone. You’re holding the device tightly in your fingers, clinging to it almost desperately. “I can’t believe Harry did that to you.”
“Well, I did piss him off,” Tom reasons. “I got him back, anyway.”
“Yeah?”
“Fuck yeah, darling. Put a bunch of, like, millipedes and creepy crawly things in his bed.” Tom pauses to laugh, his voice lighter. “He hated me for about a year after that. Tried to kill me with his eyes every time he saw me.”
You roll your eyes. “You’re a nightmare,” you respond. “I’m seeing him at the weekend, and Sam. I can’t wait to get their perspectives on the demon you used to be.”
“I’m still a demon now, darling.”
“Yeah.” You lick across your lower lip, mind briefly darkening. He can be particularly devilish, whenever the mood strikes. “Love you, though.”
“And I love you.” Tom’s quiet again for a few moments, and when he speaks, his voice is gentle, “I love how much you like my family. It’s really special to me that you get along with them.”
You suck on your lower lip. “Of course,” you reply. “I love them. They… They feel like my brothers too, sometimes. Is that weird?”
“No.” You hear rustling again, followed by a soft grunt as he tries to find a better position to lay in. “Darling, family is everything to me, you know that. It’s a joy to see you fit in with my family, and I know they love you like a sister, too. Mum’s always saying how she sees you like a daughter.”
You glance up at your canvas, the shapes blurring with unshed tears. “She said that today, actually,” you murmur.
“Exactly.” Tom’s voice is passionate, alight and engaged. You can feel his strain. “You’re family.”
The air between you stills, and you wonder if he knows that you’re on the verge of tears, if he knows how grateful you are to him for inviting you into his life and letting you touch each piece of him without hesitation. The intricacies of his soul have gone so long unfelt, but he’s let you handle them, let you dust them off and admire them.
“Show me your art?” Tom adds, voice slightly thicker. “Please?”
“One sec.” You swallow down the hot lump of emotions that press at the back of your throat and pull your phone away from your ear. After briefly tousling your hair, you tap at the screen and enable the video setting. You flip the camera so it’s facing out in front of you, the canvas being framed by your phone screen. “This is what I’ve been doing today… Over there are the ones from the last few weeks.”
Tom spends a few minutes on a virtual tour of your studio, cooing soft words of endearment as you talk him through each piece. He’s tired, his voice often interspersed with soft yawns and grunts of fatigue, but he blows away all suggestions of disconnecting. Your tour takes you all throughout the house, showing him the slight alterations you’ve made to a few pieces of furniture in his absence. You end up in your bedroom, showing him the new blanket you bought for your bed.
“I want to see your face,” you whine, finally settling in bed. You’re laying on his side, head resting on top of the pillow that smells of him. Tom had watched you change into pyjamas, witnessed you brushing your teeth and getting ready for bed. All you’ve had is a black screen. “How am I supposed to sleep without seeing you, Tommy?” You pout at the blank phone, trying really hard to get him to yield. It’s 3am now and you’re delirious with fatigue, but you’re craving him more than ever.
“I don’t look nice, though,” he complains. “I look ugly.”
You practically recoil at the words. You hope he can feel the ferocity in your gaze as you glare at your phone’s camera.
“You don’t,” you say. “You never look anything short of handsome.”
Tom chuckles. “You’re too kind,” he says, “but really. I got beat up a bit. My face is all…” He makes a sound of nonchalance. “Well.. It doesn’t matter. You don’t need to know the gory details.”
Your eyebrows shoot up your forehead at the word gory. “Show me,” you ask, voice softer. You snuggle further into bed, pulling the sheets further around your figure and trying to pretend you’re being hugged by your boyfriend instead of the feather down duvet. “Please, baby. I’m worried.”
Tom sighs. “Okay, but before I show you, you have to promise not to freak out.” As he sees your widening eyes, he adds. “Exactly! Don’t freak out! I’m fine. Can’t even feel it, the amount of painkillers I’m on. I’m alright.”
“...Okay.”
A few moments pass, and you hear him curse as he clumsily presses at the screen. When your phone lights up, showing a depiction of your boyfriend’s face, you have to bite back a gasp. Bruises cloud his left cheek, deep shades of red clinging to his cheekbone. There are scratches, too, riddled with scabs and lined with pink skin. The most obvious and upsetting sign of his injury however is his nose.
“Did you break your nose again?” you ask, voice soft. The skin beneath his eyes is bruising, and there’s a dark mark across the bridge of his nose.
“No, thank god,” Tom murmurs. “Just got hit on it.”
He’s laying in bed too, and you turn onto your side and prop him up on one of the pillows so it’s as if he’s laying beside you. With a dark burgundy hoodie pulled over his head, obscuring his curls, he looks pale and tepid. His cheeks are sunken, and it’s not just from the injury. Tom seems exhausted.
“Are you okay, apart from that?”
“Hm?”
“Are you okay, Tom?”
He offers a weak smile. “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” His voice fades with each iteration. You watch as Tom bites his lower lip, then reaches up to press his fingers into the tense lines of his pebbled forehead. “Just tired, darling. It’s been a busy week.”
“Come home,” you say, sleepy and wistful. “I’ll take care of you.”
“I can’t, my darling,” he mumbles. Tom’s eyes look at you sadly. “Things would fall apart.”
“You’re falling apart.”
“I’ll be fine.”
“Will you?”
Tom’s quiet for a while, and you watch him swallow. He gives you a tense nod, lips pulled into a frown. “I have to be.”
His words hurt you, but you know you shouldn’t push it further. Not with his eyes glassy and his chin twitching.
“You don’t,” you say softly. “Come home.”
Tom hums. His eyes are like two diamonds, holding the weight of the world, of a life so recklessly lived. His gaze skitters across your phone, and he arches a brow when he sees you stifle a yawn. “Goodnight, darling.”
You wish you could hold him, or touch him. You wish you could get anything more than the static and the empty bed.
“Night, Tom,” you whisper. “Sweet dreams.”
“Sweet dreams to you too, baby.” Tom puckers up his lips and blows you a kiss. You return it, lips tweaking into a soft smile. “Love you more than anything.”
Your voice feels thick as you echo the sentiments. “Talk tomorrow,” you murmur, tired. “Love you.”
“Bye, bye, bye.”
You’re the one to disconnect, unable to take the imminent heartache that comes with being the last to say goodbye. Tom fades, and you let your phone fall over.
The pain returns, pressing into your heart. It’s raw and cold, and it makes you shiver. A few tears soak into the pillow that smells of him, cool against your hairline.
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
You wake up the next morning, slowly at first, then all at once.
It’s light in your bedroom. Your sleepy mind wonders if you’d forgotten to draw the curtains when you’d crashed out last night. As you bemoan the bright light that hurts your closed eyes, you slowly twitch awake. Feeling an ache in your arm, you try to move, only to find something rendering you incapacitated. You frown in your tired haze, trying again to move, just to stay exactly where you are again. Your brows furrow next, and you slowly rouse to consciousness as you try to work out what’s going on.
Your heart rate spikes as you realise there are two arms wrapped around you. Warmth envelops you, pressing into your back, your legs, your waist. You jerk awake, panicking for a moment before you feel his lips on your shoulder, and smell the familiar scent of him.
“Shh, darling. It’s me.”
Immediately, you roll over, twisting in his arms until you’re looking at him. His eyes are soft, hair a mess, and he offers you the gentlest smile you’ve ever seen.
“Tom?!” you exclaim, voice catching in the back of your throat. “H-How— but—?”
Both of Tom’s hands go to your cheeks, and he pulls you in for a blinding morning kiss. You sigh as warmth fills every part of you, his lips washing away the angst and the sadness you’d felt just hours earlier. You moan into it, a soft rumble, and curl into him. As you run your hands over his bare form, you appreciate how his muscles are firm and supple beneath your fingertips. You map him out attentively, touch dipping into the shades of his muscles as you try to imprint him to your memory again.
When Tom breaks the kiss, he presses his lips to the tip of your nose. As his warm breath fans out across your face, he stares at you, eyes gentle. Keeping one hand on your cheek, Tom lets the other drift down. When he reaches your neck, he tugs at the chain you keep looped around your throat, his nimble fingers going to play with the ring on the end, still there, hanging between you.
“I couldn’t sleep,” he says slowly. He pulls on the chain and brings you in nearer, kissing you again, softly. “We said goodnight, and...”
Your hands are in his hair, gently stroking the mane from his face. It’s longer now, thicker and brighter than before. You push it away and look at his features. The bruises don’t seem as pronounced now, and you think he must’ve spent time in the sun. Light freckles dust the bridge of his nose, slanted and wonky but perfect nonetheless.
“Hmm?”
Tom licks his lips. “I couldn’t stay away any longer. I left it all to Haz.” Again, he steals your lips in a kiss. He follows up the action with several more, light dustings in quick succession. He tastes minty, and you wonder how long he’s been cuddling you. “I don’t care if we lose Manchester. I don’t care if we lose everything.” He swallows seriously. “I can’t lose you.”
“You were never going to lose me,” you whisper. You brush your thumb across his unscarred cheekbone. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“But I missed you,” Tom whines. He drops his face, lips drifting down to suckle at the base of your neck. You giggle as he leaves tickling kisses all over your skin, mouthing at all the spots that make you laugh until he’s found his way up to your lips. With a hand on your jaw, fingers on your chin, he guides your face to look at him. “Time away gave me a lot of time to think,” he adds, voice drifting lower. A shadow of a doubt passes over his face. “I spent a long time pondering.”
“Yeah?” If he wasn’t holding you so tightly, you’d be concerned. Instead, you continue to muss your thumb across his cheekbone, gazing at him adoringly. “What were you thinking about?”
“Hmm. Well…” Tom lies back, sitting up with his elbow digging into the pillow as he turns to rest on his side. You mirror his position, stretching out your legs beneath the covers as a small yawn slips past you. “I realised that you’re the only person who makes a nice cup of tea. Even I can’t make one as well as you.”
You smile softly. “Don’t let Harrison hear that.”
He chuckles. “He’d be a bitch about it.” Tom’s eyes slide over your figure, gaze soft. You hum in quiet agreement, and he sucks in another breath. “I realised that no one else loves my friends like you do, and the same with my family.” Tom reaches out, hand slithering beneath the duvet until he finds your waist. His fingers are smooth, without the jewelry that usually adorns them. His calloused fingertips roll across your hip, and everything about the moment feels bare and authentic. “I love you now, and I know that I’ll love you forever.”
Something inside your chest clicks, and you find yourself looking at him a little differently.
“Where’s this all coming from?” you ask, looking at him, eyes wide.
“My heart.” Tom pulls you a little closer, and you think you see him swallow nervously. “C’mere, angel.” He turns and lays on his back, gently coaxing you to straddle him.
You settle over him, laying on top of his bare chest. He’s in boxers, and they rub up against your shorts as you shift around on top of him. Tom’s hair presses into the white pillow, wild and messy, but not unlike a halo. With the late morning sun highlighting his worn face with golden stripes, he looks ethereal.
“Darling,” he murmurs. “Gimme a kiss.”
You bend over, and Tom greets you with a warm open-mouthed kiss. He doesn’t seem to care that you’re tired and groggy as he reaches out to cup your cheek, the other hand resting on your hip. You smile against his lips as his fingertips dip beneath the material of your shirt, rubbing light circles to your flesh as you sit up eagerly and press back in. His kisses feel like droplets of fire, setting off small chain reactions with each press of his lips to yours.
When you pull back to admire him, the chain around your neck goes swinging. Your eyes widen as you hear the thump of heavy metal colliding with Tom’s chin, followed by his soft grunt.
“Oh,” you exclaim, immediately feeling your face fall. “I’m sorry, baby. I always forget about the ring on the end.” You bend over to kiss his chin, then sit up straighter, hands absently travelling along the chain. The metal feels familiar beneath your fingertips, and you sigh softly. “I haven’t taken it off since you left,” you admit. “It was nice feeling connected to you, and the ring you left—”
The words die in the back of your throat when you reach for the ring and feel two instead of one, looped side by side on the chain. Confusion twitches across your face as you look down and inspect the piece of jewelry.
Tom’s ring is still on the chain, silver and bold, but sitting beside it is a dantier ring, the band thinner. It lacks the brash family crest that Tom’s harbours so proudly, and has a diamond as its centrepiece. Your fingers go to it immediately, and you find yourself trembling as you pull it closer to your face, inspecting the perfect cut of the sparkling diamond. It’s a large jewel, but it isn’t too flashy, and the ornate twisting of the band is beautiful.
You look back to Tom, who’s watching you with his lower lip pulled between his teeth. Nerves shadow every one of his features, and it’s such a rare look on him that it takes you off guard.
“Angel,” he says slowly, reaching out to take one of your hands. “I love you. I want us to spend the rest of our lives together… I want to grow old with you by my side, and wake up to you each morning. I want to watch our kids muck around in the back garden, and I know… I know I’m not supposed to want these things. I don’t deserve them, and I’m being incredibly selfish even having you here with me right now, but I love you, and nothing will ever change that.” Tom squeezes your hand. “You’re the only woman in the world that I’d ever be able to love like this, and it would be the greatest honour of my life if you married me.”
You’re quiet for a few moments, processing his words. Entranced, you shake off his hand and reach up, tugging off the chain that hangs so heavily from your neck. You unpick the clasp and the necklace falls open, depositing both of the rings into the palm of your hand. They sit there, side by side, and you feel a tear skate down your cheek.
“Tom,” you say, voice thick with tears. “I’d love to marry you.”
The rings press into your palm as he hurries up to kiss you, smiling against yours lips. Tom’s nose nuzzles against yours, and when he pulls back, you see his eyes are red too.
“Thank fuck,” he murmurs. “I was so worried for a second that you were going to say no.”
Your laugh is light and vibrant, and you hold out your hand for Tom to pick up the engagement ring. As he slides the engagement band up your finger, you take his ring, chunky and heavy, and tenderly press it up his finger, joining it with his fourth finger instead of his index. You bend over to kiss the rise of his knuckles, then pull back as you feel him do the same to yours. Through blurry eyes, you bring your hand towards you and admire the gem as it sparkles there.
“In what world would I ever say no to this?” you muse, after a few moments. “I want to be with you forever, Tom. You know that.” Tom’s still looking at his ring, at where it joins at his knuckle, but he glances up when you drift nearer. “I came off birth control.”
His eyes darken slightly. “I know.”
You hold his face in his hands. “You’re silly,” you say. You peck his cheek. “I need to brush my teeth,” you decide. You know exactly where this is going, and you want it to be perfect.
Tom pouts, but he helps you up from his lap. He watches you walk across the room, and his gaze stays on you as you keep the door to the en-suite open and start to brush your teeth. “Miss you, darling,” he calls out. You roll your eyes, but your heart beats a little faster. “You look ethereal.”
When you’re finished in the bathroom, you hurry back to bed. You find your way back into Tom’s lap, sinking into him to share a fresh kiss. “Tell me more about what you want with me,” you continue, voice darker.
With a determined smirk on his lips, Tom flips you. You release a huff of air as you find yourself laying on the mattress, head on the pillow, with him suspended above you. He plants a forearm on either side of your head and gazes down at you fondly.
“I want to settle down with you,” he says slowly. “Maybe start to divide my assets, give a little bit more power to Haz. I want to focus on you.” He pecks your lips before continuing. “I want to watch your gallery grow into the most successful place in London, and I want to be by your side at every opening. I want a big white wedding, with the cake, and the confetti, and the best honeymoon that’s ever been had. I am going to spoil you rotten.”
“You already do a very good job of that.”
“I’ll kick it up a level. I’ll have to. You’ll be my wife.” Tom’s face darkens. His hand shifts down to rest over your lower stomach. “We’ll need to wait for a lot of those things to happen, but there’s one thing that I want that we can start working on right now.”
Your mouth goes dry, and you feel the space between your legs throb. You tilt your head to the side as you stare up at his handsome face. “And what would that be?”
“Our heirs, darling.” He smirks when you whimper, warm fingers dipping beneath your shirt until he’s able to touch the flesh of your belly more directly. “I’m gonna fill you up with my babies, angel. Fuck you really good. ‘M gonna keep cumming until you’re full of me, then fuck you full again.”
You moan as he drops his face to your ear, suckling hard marks against your skin. “Fuck,” you murmur, burying your hands in his hair. “That sounds so obscene.”
“Yeah, but you like it, don’t you? You’re my dirty little thing, hm?” Tom bites at your neck, teeth nipping you and making you shiver. “I know you want me to cum in you so much that it drips down your thighs for hours after I’m gone. You want me to make a mess of your pretty cunt.”
“Please, Tom,” you whimper. You feel hot and bothered already.
“Eager, darling?” Tom sits back and gently reaches for the hem of your pyjama top. You bring your hands above your head as he gently tugs it up your arms, throwing it off to the side without thought. He crawls back over you and seizes your breasts in his hands, his metallic ring like a cool shock against your skin. When he nibbles at your nipple and follows up the action with a lap of his tongue, you whimper.
“Don’t be a tease,” you beg, squeezing your thighs together. “I need you, Tom. Haven’t been with you in so long.”
He looks up at you, tit held between his lips. Tom winks as he gives the bud a noisy suck, then pulls back to address the other. He keeps his thumbs busy, and as he moves away his mouth, he replaces his touch with the pad of his fingers, swirling his spit around your skin with ease.
“There’s no rush,” he announces. He keeps his hands on your breasts, kneading softly and stimulating your nipples as he knows you like, but his mouth starts to move. Tom trails light kisses down your form, keeping his eyes on yours. He observes you through darkened eyes. “Don’t whinge,” he adds, the tips of his teeth sparkling ravenously. “I’m going to fuck you so well you’ll cry, but not yet. Let me enjoy this.”
His promise makes you squirm, and Tom takes advantage of the fact your hips are off the bed and tugs your shorts and panties down your legs in one fell swoop. As you part your legs, you invite him closer, biting back a frown as Tom settles between your thighs but pays your legs attention instead of your centre. Your folds are slick already—you can feel them wet, hot, pulsing with more urgency the longer you spend watching your boyfriend’s muscles flex as he draws his lips across your figure.
Tom teases you, drawing out the moment until you’re quivering. His lips draw down to your shins, his whole body sliding down the bed until he’s just out of reach. You lean back against the pillow and try to enjoy it, revelling in the warmth that he dusts across your bare skin with each small kiss. Tom traces love hearts up your legs with his fingertips, drawing large ones over each one of your knees before tracing over the outline with his tongue. As his spittle cools over your skin, Tom finally parts your thighs.
“Such a pretty sight,” he moans, taking a moment to admire your glistening cunt. You think he’s going to dive straight in, but then he smirks, and you know that was just wishful thinking. Instead, Tom nuzzles his nose against the soft flesh of your inner thigh and goes back to kissing.
He’s needier now, moving with fervour. Sucking harshly, you know he’s marking your inner thighs, drawing an arrow towards your centre with a line of bruises. He delineates his journey, marking out the precise route he needs to take up to your sweet lips as if leaving instructions.
“Tom, please,” you moan. He’s so close to you that you can feel his hot breath coming out across you. He looks up at you and throws out a wild grin, his eyes bright and his smirk as bold as ever. “Please stop teasing me.”
He hums softly. “Okay, my darling,” Tom murmurs. You release a deep sigh of relief. “But only because I can’t go another second without tasting my pussy…” His thumbs gently move along your petals, light with his touch and teasing you until your cunt clenches around nothing. “You don’t mind if I’m a little rough, do you, angel?” He blinks up at you innocently. “I tend to get a little bit lost in you, but you know that by now, don’t you?”
“It’s okay,” you say. “Give me anything… ‘m aching for you.”
Tom’s devilish smirk makes you wonder if giving him complete control was a good idea, but the thought goes flying from your mind as he nuzzles his face closer and finally indulges himself. Moaning loudly as he tastes you, his lips gradually envelop your clit, hot tongue lightly glancing off the engorged rise of the bud as you cry out. He’s wet with you, letting his tongue make your slit all messy.
Tom brings two slender fingers to your lips and parts them in a V. His nose brushes up against your clit as he slowly moves down. As the thick muscle of his tongue presses against your dewy entrance, he emits a low-pitched moan.
“God, darling,” he purrs. “Tastes even sweeter than usual.” As the vibrations of his words thrum over your cunt, you shiver and grab at his hair. One of Tom’s hands grabs at your inner thigh, pushing it up and opening you wider until he’s able to move deeper. You gasp as both of his thumbs shift down to hold your lips apart, tender petals parting easily.
As Tom slides his tongue into you, your eyes roll back in your head. You squirm against the sheets as wetness drips between your cheeks, a mix of your heat and his spit as Tom devours you. He moans against you, dragging his tongue against your tender walls. The sensations of his smooth muscle twisting against your sensitive pussy makes you shiver, and when he adds a thumb to your clit, you cry out loudly.
“Tom, oh fuck.”
He traces around your bud with a light finger, teasing the edge of the bud with his fingernail. Impatient and needy, you rut down against him, a choked sob bubbling up in the back of your throat. Your chest is heaving, your nipples perked and erect, and your fingers shake as you hold him to your heat. Tom seems to go deeper with each thrust of his tongue, moaning as he makes you messy, leaving no part of you untouched.
You call out a quiet warning, blind with lust and on the verge of tears. “‘M gonna cum,” you mewl. “Feels too good.”
He hums aggressively against you and dives deeper with his tongue, touching your clit until you peak. The feeling of your walls clenching and contracting against his face makes you whine, rutting down against him as you ride it out. Tom takes it, stays pliant as you grind onto his tongue, continuing to stimulate your passage until your back arches from the bed and you break into a hot sweat. When Tom pulls back, he’s quick to replace his tongue with two fingers, and the moan you release is garbled and excessive.
“T-Tom,” you cry out. He curls his index and middle finger into you with ease, his fourth dropping down to rest between your cheeks. You can feel the metal of his heavy silver ring, cool against your skin. “S’too much.”
He finally looks up at you after an eternity admiring your heat. His eyes are wide and feral, his chin coated in your juices. You whimper as you see streaks of white cum clinging to the early morning shadow of his chin. Tom grins inquisitively as he thrusts his fingers faster, your heat so slick and open that the movement draws out loud noises.
“I don’t think it’s too much, darling,” he mumbles. “I think you’re being my good girl, hm? We’ve barely started.” He drops his lips and nuzzles further between your legs, looking up at you with your clit held loosely in his mouth. He gently laps across the rise before releasing it and pressing a light kiss to the engorged bud. “I’m going to make you cum so much you forget your name, lovie. Gonna show you how much I appreciate you today and for every other day of our lives.”
You like the sound of that, and your cunt throbs persistently as Tom curves his fingers up and his fingertips brush against your ridged g-spot. As your hips threaten to spasm from the bed again, Tom sits up and shifts his arm, so it weighs down your lower stomach. “More,” you decide, hearing your heat prickle as Tom speeds up his fingers.
He adds his ring finger, and you cry out as the smooth band of metal presses up against your entrance. The contrast of cold against the ravaging fire of your hole is almost orgasmic in itself.
“Pretty little pussy,” he muses. “Need to stretch you out for my cock, da’ling. Haven’t taken me in so long, I don’t want to hurt you when I stuff you full.”
You’re so wet. You can feel the flat of Tom’s hand coated in your arousal, hear your heat as he fucks you. You try to pay attention to him, but you find yourself slipping when he drops his lips back to your bud and starts to suck on it. As Tom traces incessant circles over your clit, he alternates between long laps of his tongue and more focused kitten licks. Your desperate fingers curl around the silky sheets as you recognise that he knows your cunt well, and he’s learnt the right angle and depth that he needs to travel to in order to get you to the edge. He’s persistent and ruthless in the pursuit of his objective.
You peak for the second time as he curls his fingertips up against your tender g-spot, moaning around your clit under you’re crying out. Your eyes burn with tears as you call out his name, voice clouded by curse words and desperate sounds of enjoyment. You’re loud, thrashing in the sheets until he has to reach up and press you into place, not moving as he continues to stimulate you through it. It feels unending—an eternal tunnel of throbbing pleasure, your cunt squeezing his digits until it’s almost too much.
When you grow too sensitive, you tell him as much, and Tom pulls back to reach blindly for your hand. He finds it, then separates from your mound. His fingers slowly slip from your aching cunt, causing you to gasp, but he softens it out by kissing over the knuckles of your other hand, then your lower stomach.
“Perfect, angel,” he coos. Tom pushes your legs shut again, being careful not to hurt you as he crawls on top of you. He squeezes your hand as he continues to kiss all over your stomach, hips and chest, retracing his tracks from earlier until he finds your nipples. You moan as he laps at both of them messily before moving up to your face and kissing you intensely. His tongue tastes of your juices, your arousal sticking to his tongue. The tangy hue sticks to your own mouth, and you moan as you taste it.
“God, I love kissing you,” he murmurs against you, voice rumbling into you. Tom gasps your face with his clean hand, holding you tightly. “Could do this for the rest of my life.”
You’re hungry as you chase him, body tired but craving more. As Tom starts to roll his hips against yours, the press of his length to your centre makes you excited.
“I can taste myself on your tongue,” you admit. The blend of you and him makes you feel ravenous.
“Really?” Tom sits up, his face flickering with enjoyment as you start to grind up against his hips. He circles his waist against yours, both of you enjoying the little pleasure until you find the capacity to nod. “You’re nice, aren’t you?”
You lick your lips, watching the way he stares at you. “Yeah,” you say. “Tastes of you, too.”
Tom reaches up, and with the hand still covered in your juices, he feeds three fingers into your mouth. You moan around them as he imitates thrusting motions, smearing your cum over your tongue. There’s a metallic twang as he pushes deeper, his ring brushing up against the tip of your tongue as he fucks towards your throat. The taste makes you shiver.
“There you go, clean me up,” he coaxes. He presses a soft kiss to the tip of your nose before hovering above you. Tom’s eyes, dark and hungry, shift down to your lips, and he raises a brow. “Such a pretty mouth. Wish I had time to fuck it, too, but shit… I need to be in you, darling.”
When he pulls his fingers from your mouth, you feel empty. Your tongue is light—too light. A pout settles over your lips.
“Why are you frowning?” Tom adds as he sits back on his shins. You sit up a little straighter, strength regained as you watch him move around and shed his boxers. You almost moan as you watch his cock spring free, tall and flushed red. You’ve missed it. You’ve missed him.
“Feel empty without you,” you respond.
Tom slides over you again, and you part your legs. With ease, he slots himself between your thighs, his throbbing crown resting against your clit as your wet lips envelop the rest of his member.
“Well, you’re going to be very full soon,” he murmurs, looking up to kiss your jaw. He waits above your lips, quirking a brow. “Open, then, if you’re so needy.”
Your teeth catch your gnawed lower lip before you follow instruction, opening your mouth for him. Tom presses one of his hands against your shoulder as he leans up. He rests a thumb to your chin and looks down at you, eyes glimmering with mischievousness as he puckers his lips and hums. A moment later, Tom spits into your mouth, his dirty spittle falling onto your tongue. He groans at the sight, and you reach up to grab at his broad shoulders as the heat of the possessiveness rolls over you. Tom chases his action with a deep kiss, his fingers rolling back down to pull up your thigh and open you for him.
As he enters you, it’s a smooth movement. Everything flows together—your tongues, your bodies, your hearts. Tom’s able to guide himself inside you almost seamlessly, and you’re so aroused already that the stretch is comfortable.
“Fuck,” you gasp, falling back from his lips.
“Oh, god,” Tom groans. “That’s it. Fuck yeah.” He kisses you again as he slowly pulls out, sliding back into you with ease. His lips are hot as they rest on yours, unmoving as he gets lost in the pleasure.
“You’re so big,” you whimper, eyes rolling back as he continues to thrust into you. Tom’s building it up slowly, rutting deeply against your heat as his member explores your walls. It’s a little clumsy before he establishes a rhythm, his groove coming back after a few weeks apart, but when he gets it right, it feels otherworldly.
“You’re gorgeous,” he says, dropping his face against your shoulder. You bury your hands in his hair, fingers tensing around his strands when he bites at your skin. “Love of my life,” he coos. “Love this pussy more than life itself. Love you more than anything.”
Overwhelmed, you hum, the sound twisting into a gasp as he grinds against you and the crown of his flushed length hits your sensitive spot. “God, yeah,” you agree. “Feels so good, Tom. Go deeper.”
He obliges you for a few moments before his rhythm fades, and he stills with his cock stuffed deep within you. Your fingers play with his hair as you feel him kiss your shoulder, then follow up the action with a lap of his tongue.
“I want you on top, darling,” Tom grunts, words smearing against your neck. He’s panting, hot breath making your skin wet. “Need to see my beautiful wife.” You clench around him, and you feel him chuckle into your shoulder.  “C’mere,” he coaxes. “I’ll help you up.”
It’s dizzying to readjust, but as soon as you’ve taken your place in Tom’s lap, you feel better. You’re impossibly close, able to watch his face constrict with pleasure every time you lower yourself on him. He’s got his head thrown back against the headboard, half-closed eyes watching you, ringed-fingers digging into your hips.
“Tom,” you whimper. “Feels so good.” Your eyes are rolling back, your body trembling as he helps you move. With each bounce down, Tom ruts his hips up to meet you, and when you shift slightly to the side and lean forward, his tip brushes up against your spot. Arcs of electricity zing through your centre, adding layers to your enjoyment.
“The way that you look right now should be breaking the law,” he says, voice held tight. Tom grabs one of your tits in his palm, roughened thumb toying with the nipple until you squirm. “You’re stunning, angel. All mine…” he drops down to kiss at the base of your neck. “Mine forever.”
“Y-Yeah, ‘m yours,” you stammer, voice hitching as his index finger trails back down to your bud. It knocks you off balance how quickly your third high threatens to surge across you.
Tom sees it on your face, growls as he feels you clench around him. “Come on, darling. Give me another one.” His greedy fingers continue to move your hips as the others play around with your clit. The bud tingles, stimulated beyond anything you’ve felt before, but the ache makes it better. “Always the prettiest when you cum, angel. Make the prettiest sounds too. Go on, my love. Let me hear you sing for me.”
It takes a few moments for you to peak, and when you do, you go loose in Tom’s arms. It ripples over you like a blur, your limbs feeling equal parts boneless and taut. Everything fades, pulled back to the bare primal motions of orgasm, warmth spreading through your entire body until it consumes you.
No sooner have you finished your release does Tom scoop you up in his arms and press you back against the mattress. He continues to drill into you, moving roughly against you, grinding his hips into you. Both of you are sweaty, and the space between your legs is sticky from all the aroused fluids that you’ve released, but he doesn’t care. He buries himself in your heat, losing himself in the feelings as you claw at his back, unable to comprehend the pleasures of overstimulation on a scale as intense as this.
“You’re okay, yeah?” Tom says, pulling away from your neck to stare at you. You’re slack-jawed and panting, but you nod. He likes to push you, and you like being stretched to your limits, but he never does it cruelly. He’s always attentive as he picks you apart, slowly breaking you open until you’re shattered into pieces that only he can reassemble. There’s love behind everything he does with you.
“Yeah,” you manage, voice broken. Hot tears of enjoyment pool in your eyes, a muffled groan leaving you when Tom reaches for your thigh and tugs it open roughly. You curl your leg around his back, allowing him in completely, and as you gain that familiar friction back against your g-spot, you melt against the sheets.
“You know what I’m going to do, angel?” Tom grunts. He’s heavy on top of you, body a blur as he fucks you harder, faster, deeper. “I’m going to get your initials tattooed on my ring finger, so you’re there even without the ring.” He stares down at your face, love swirling in his frenzied eyes. “I’m going to—fuck, I’m gonna fuck you so good for the rest of your life, darling. I promise you that. Yeah.” He nuzzles at your cheek, hot breath panting across your skin as he drops his voice to a gritty whisper. “I’m gonna love you, cherish you, fucking adore you… Gonna put a baby in you.”
“Holy shit,” you mutter.
Tom slows his thrusts, his hips stammering in a way suggestive of the way he’s near a peak and wants to put it off. With an intensity that you’ve never seen before, he reaches down, balancing on his strong arms until he’s able to rest his hot palm against your lower stomach. He presses against your skin as he thrusts into you a few more times, slowing but burying himself deeper.
“Can you feel me?” he says. “I’m in so deep, darling. I can feel everything. Such a wet pussy. So greedy.”
“Yeah,” you whimper. “You’re so big, T. I can’t think about anything else.”
“Mmm, good, ‘cos you’re the only thing I’m thinking about right now.” He dances his fingers across the soft skin of your stomach, contrasting the gentleness as he drops his head to the crook of your neck and nips at your skin. “Can’t wait to fill you up,” he admits roughly. “Thought about it every night I was away.”
“Yeah?” You brush your hands through his sweaty hair, tugging as he drives a little deeper.
“Fuck yeah, baby. Go on, touch your clit.” Tom waits until you’ve done as instructed to continue with his musings. “Thought about how you’ll look, belly all swollen with my cum. I love those pretty whimpers you make when I pull out, and my seed pours down your thighs. Can’t wait to fuck it back into you until you’re crying.”
“—oh god,” you whine.
“Mm, yeah. I felt you clench then, darling. I know how much you like the idea of taking fuckin’ everything I give you.” Tom presses firmer against your lower stomach, accompanying the action with a particularly hard rut. “You’re gonna feel me here, lovie, right in your womb. Gonna stuff you to the fucking brim until there’s no chance you aren’t pregnant. Gonna fill you with my babies, give us the heirs we both deserve.”
“Please,” you beg, voice broken. It’s overwhelming in the best way, your bud rebelling as you toy with it. But you’re persistent, matching the deep rolls of Tom’s hips as you feel another climax stir in the pit of your stomach. Everything feels so fluid and wet that it’s hard to tell where you stop, and Tom begins. He’s tangled up so completely in you that he has become part of your existence. “Please, Tom, I want it.”
“What do you want?” Tom teases. He’s a devil, looks up to smirk at you. You can feel how badly he wants to snap into release just from the way he’s controlling his thrusts, but he isn’t going to cave until he gets exactly what he wants. “Use your words, gorgeous girl. I know you can do it.”
He’s in so close, lips on your cheeks, chin, nose, and lips. His heat envelopes you, clouding your brain. With each nudge of his tip deeper against your walls, you get closer to losing it, clinging to the firm muscles of his back like it’s your only lifeline.
“Give me it all,” you choke out. “I want it, Tom, deep in me. Want you to fill me up with your cum.” His curls are sweaty as you reach up to fist your trembling hands in them, entirely at his mercy. “Wanna feel you lose yourself in me.”
“Mmm, okay, baby,” he groans. His voice is broken, thick and tired from exertion. He kisses you roughly, all tongue and teeth, the noisy meshing sounds of your lips mingling with the chaos of his hips slapping down against yours. “Oh fuck,” he pulls away to say. “Oh fuck. Oh—”
With a heavy grunt, Tom finally spills. He releases a loud groan, hips snapping forwards with an animalistic force as he drives his cock deeper, shaft pulsing as your walls squeeze around him. You cry out, cumming for the fourth time. Your climax feels like the main attraction, as if every other orgasm has merely been part of the buildup. You push up against him, breasts pressing into Tom’s chest as your eyes screw shut, tears cascading down your cheeks as pleasure burns through you. His name pours past your lips like a prayer until it’s all that you know, all that you care to know.
It ends, and you’re trembling. Intense aftershocks rock through you, and you feel Tom kiss all over your cheeks as he coos soft words of endearment into your ear. His lips become wet, and you realise that blissful tears have skated down your face.
“Lovely girl... Best girl…” He’s gentle, tender. You jump, opening your eyes suddenly as Tom slips from you, causing your aching walls to spasm. He looks up at you, lifting a questioning brow as he reaches down towards your clit. “Finished?” he asks. When his fingertips lightly make contact with your bud, you wince. Everywhere aches, and it’s nice, but it’s enough.
“Definitely finished,” you choke out.
“Okay, okay… sorry, love.” Tom gently pulls back, flashing you an apologetic smile as he kisses your inner thigh. He shuffles around, eyeing the sight of his cum leaking from your hole, and you watch him shudder. “Fuck….” You can feel it slowly dripping from your entrance and clench your walls just to see his reaction. Tom groans, chewing his lips and continuing to stare until you shiver. He smoothes a hand over your thigh. “Sweet thing,” he whispers. “I’ll bring you some water.”
It only feels like he’s gone for a second, and you realise you’re drifting, ecstatic and loose-limbed. Tom is suddenly behind you, delicately hauling you into his arms. He sits against the headboard and pulls you into a tight hug from behind, kissing over your shoulders as you whimper softly. You can feel the soft fabric of his sweats as he settles you in his lap.
“Such a good girl,” he murmurs. He presses a glass of water into your hand and helps you take a sip. As the cool liquid soothes your throat, you relax into his hold. “Love you, love you… Love you so much.”
He’s so warm against you, holding you tight. Your eyes still feel wet.
“Love you too,” you say. Tom takes the glass from your hand and puts it down on the bedside table, and you turn in his arms to kiss him. Your lips feel puffy and sore, but the ache is worth the relief of feeling your fiancé’s mouth gently press to yours. You sigh as the tension leaves your shoulders, draining away as he loves you, and holds you.
“Am gonna clean you up, now,” Tom mumbles, voice soft. You look at him, curious until you feel a warm cloth pressing against your thighs. You part your legs, turning back in his arms and snuggling further into his grasp as he delicately runs the material over your centre. “Sorry, darling,” he says as you wince. He’s so gentle, but it still aches in a way that hurts.
“What time is it?” you ask, mind running slow.
Tom throws the cloth aside, then reaches out and grabs one of the thick furs that sits on top of your bed. “3pm.”
Your eyes widen. “What?” you murmur, brows creasing. “What time did we wake up?”
“Around midday.”
“Wow.” You smile softly as Tom tucks you both in, covering your shivering form with the blanket. You reach up, leaving your left arm above the fur and reaching out to take Tom’s hand. “Time flies when you’re having fun.”
He laughs and tangles your hands together. Tom’s palm is warm against yours, and his other hand curves around to fiddle with your new ring.
“Indeed it does, darling,” he coos. “I had a lot of fun. Did you?”
“Always.”
You watch him play with your ring for a while, his lips moving over your sweaty neck. You’re still hot and exhausted, but he doesn’t seem to mind. He holds you tight all the same, not caring that you’re messy and still quivering from the aftershocks. Soft sentences of adoration pour from his lips as he holds you.
“After this,” Tom says, voice slow, “I thought we could have a nice bath… maybe drink some champagne, have some dinner… then I want to hear everything you’ve been up to for the last month, and maybe we can celebrate some more.”
You nod softly. Turning in his arms, you sit up to face him properly, dragging the large blanket with you and draping it over you both as you straddle his lap and rest your arms over his shoulders. The bruising is still on Tom’s face, but he looks more handsome than you’ve ever seen him before. There’s a golden glow to his face, a certain lightness that you’ve never seen before. You reach down and take his hand, bringing it to your lips and ghosting your mouth over his ring.
“I love you so much,” you say, looking up at him from behind his hand. His smile is like the sunrise. “Thank you for everything you do for me.”
“Oh, darling.” Tom pauses to kiss you, smiling against your lips. “Don’t you know the pleasure is all mine?”
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
will i burn for this ? perhaps. but it’s worth it. thank u to my lord and saviour mr mob!tsh... i love u.
lmk what you think......? +++ if you want to see any more specific scenes from my mob!tom x reader universe?? any other milestones you’d like to see? lmk! <3
mlist + taglist are through the link in my bio <3
thank you for reading!! <3<3
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bucksfucks · 3 years
Text
  𝙘𝙡𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙚 ; 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝘃𝗲 𝗿𝗼𝗴𝗲𝗿𝘀
summary┃steve has always had his eyes on you, yours on him. catching you on the beach he finally gets a taste of what he’s missing. 
pairing┃achilles!steve x f!reader
word count┃1,721 words
warnings┃beach sex, semi-public sex, a lot of nudity, oral, fingering, skinny dipping, soft smut, light degradation, dirty talk, unprotected sex — 18+ ONLY//MINORS DNI
notes┃this is very loosely based off of the story of achilles, like...very loosely. the only similarity is the blonde hair and the fact that steve is a demi-god, other than that, it’s self-indulgent <3
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     He isn’t really sure when he first saw her. 
    All he knows is that he can’t keep his eyes off of her as she wanders through the cobbled street.
    She’s dressed in a simple gown, slightly weathered with loose strands floating above her feet as she wanders through the bazar. There’s an airiness to her, light and free as he sees light emanating from her. 
    He’s perched on top of a thick tree branch that’s able to hold his weight. Legs swinging and hair blowing in the summer air as he crunches down on the last slice of his clementine. 
    He wonders if she’d be sweeter than the sweet juice coating his tongue. 
    “If you stare at her any longer you’ll burn holes through her skull,” he feels a nudge against his right shoulder, pushing him slightly forward as someone joins him on the large branch. 
    He ignores the remark, scoffing as the bitter peel falls from his hand and other the grass below where it would be hoarded by squirrels and chipmunks. 
    Bucky’s legs dangle with Steve’s, touching but not connected as he continues to admire the way she picks a few apples into her woven basket. 
    He pays no attention to Bucky, the sound of his voice outweighed by the thoughts of her. 
    “Steve?” It’s a question as he finally snaps out of his haze, “what’s gotten into you?” Bucky asks, a genuine sense of wonderment in his tone as the younger of the two sighs. 
    “I think I’ve been struck by cupid himself.” He says aloud and Bucky can’t help but roll his eyes, but the smirk displayed on his lips makes him happy, happy that Steve has finally taken a liking to anything other than the bronzed shield he wields. 
    “I hear she has no lover,” Bucky whispers cheekily, the words catching Steve by surprise as he feels his heart leap towards her. 
    “Who told you that?” Steve asks, bewildered, amused, and hungry for more information. Bucky just laughs, jumping from the branch effortlessly before craning his head up to look at the golden haired man.
    “You’ll have to find out for yourself.” 
~
    The waves crashed against the shore, sand growing damp as you dug your toes into it. The sun was slowly fading, but still just as hot as you closed your eyes and let the sunshine was over you. 
    The beach was always a safe space, providing you with recluse when you wanted time with the most important person; yourself. 
    The woven basket you carried, now filled with fresh fruit and a jug of water, sat half buried in the tan sand, acting as a weight on the rag you lay for when you emerged from the water. 
    Shedding your clothes, you made your way beneath the waves, relishing in the cool water against your skin as your mind wandered back to the bazar. You saw him, perched atop a tree, lounging with his bow and arrow across his toned chest and back as he ate the sweet clementines you’d been trying to find. 
    Everyone knew of Steve, but vert few knew Steve. 
    He wasn’t like you or anyone else you knew, part God as his walked with a high head and a glimmer in his eye that made him shine. 
    When you made your way back onto the beach you were tired, taking you time to re-dress as you dig into the basket, an apple in hand before you’re biting down on it. 
    It’s sweet, quelling your hunger just enough, but it doesn’t satisfy you. 
    “Apples are sweet, but the summer is the season for clementines.” A sweet voice rings out from behind you, turning around to be met with none other than Steve.
    He was barefoot, buried in the sand, his bow and arrow still slung across his back and you couldn’t help but let your eyes wander across the vast expanse of his broad chest. 
    A smile stretches across your lips, tantalizing Steve as he takes a few steps closer until he’s at the edge of the rag you’re sat on. 
    “Perhaps I can entice you with one, instead?” He smirks, the orange fruit resting perfectly in the middle of his large hand as he sinks to his knees. You bite at your bottom lip, meeting his gaze. 
    “What is Steve, Son of Peleus doing talking to just a mere mortal?” You tease, craning your head slightly upward as Steve tosses the fruit upward, catching it with ease. 
    “Have you forgotten, my dear?” He muses, rolling the fruit towards you as you catch it in your own hand. “The sea is also my home, this is where I go when it calls me.” 
    His words are so soft, voice sweet like honey as it flows through the air and you feel the warm breeze surrounding you like a hug from Aeolus himself. You felt the familiar rush of butterflies you often felt when you thought about him, but here he was, in front of you with a beaming smile on his lips. 
    “Has it called you today?” You asked, a soft whisper and almost barely audible as he leans closer, “the sea amongst other things are calling me.” 
    Your heart is racing in your chest, he smells like lavender, almonds, and earth as he pulls back. He’s quick on his feet, marvelling at the muscles and strength he posses as he strips of the rest of his clothes. 
    It’s not hard to believe that he is part God, Adonis himself having competition as he flicks his eyes up at you. 
    “Join me,” he says gently, outstretching his hand before you’re stripping once again, clothes in a pile with his as you take his hand, submerging beneath the water. 
    He clearly belongs in the water, waves calming around him as he wraps his strong arms around you to bring you close to his warm body. You’re lost in the blue of his eyes, like the sky met the sea and you never want to look away. 
    “I have been dreaming of the day I can get my hands on you,” he admits faintly, your breath hitching in your throat as you can’t resist the urge to smile. 
    “The day that my lips get to meet yours,” your heart is now tumbling, core aching as you feel him stiffen against you. 
    “The day that I get to taste you.” There’s a glimmer in his eyes, mischievous, playful, and yearning as you tangle your fingers in the hair that rests at the nape of his neck. 
    Steve wastes no time in wrapping your legs around his waist before his lips are on yours, hungry and passionate as he steals the breath from your lungs until you’re dizzy. 
    Water sloshes around your bodies, breaths hot and heavy as wandering hands squeeze at your flesh and curves, Steve memorizing the way you feel. 
    Your eyes are closed, lips still on his as he carries you both onto the beach and onto the warm cloth lining the sand, gently setting you down. You take a moment to admire the way his wet hair hangs in front of you eyes, pieces of it seemingly glued down to his forehead. 
    “You are breathtaking, practically Aphrodite herself,” he mumbles against your neck, lips passing by your collarbone before he’s peeling the sweet fruit in front of your eyes. 
    “Open,” the command is gentle as you do so, parting your lips to welcome the fruit slice. You moan at the taste, relishing in the sweetness of it before Steve is running his thumb over your bottom lip. 
    His lips seal yours once again, body heavy on top of yours as you feel the weight of his cock between your thighs. It swells when you sink your teeth into his bottom lip. 
    “Mmm, so sweet, my dear,” he mumbles against your mouth, “but I can think of something sweeter.” He purrs, nose running between your breasts until he’s situated right above your hair decorated mound. 
    “Oh,” you gasp when he throws your legs over his broad shoulders, the sun just barely peeking over the horizon as Steve laps at your folds. 
    You’ve never experienced pleasure like this, every part of your body feeling as if it’s on fire as he groans against you, “so sweet.” He praises your legs beginning to tighten around his head. 
    “I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you,” he pants, emerging with wet lips as his fingers are still focused on you. You can’t keep your eyes open, back arching as you lose yourself to the pleasure; waves crashing in the background. 
    “I need to feel you, sweet. Feel all of you.” He whispers, low and raspy as he holds himself over you on his forearms. He smells like you, tastes like the sweet orange juice, and you’re hypnotized. 
    “Steve,” you can only croak out his name before he’s filling you. 
    He’s thick and it stretches you like no other as his low groans and grunts fill your ears. 
    “Feel so fuckin’ good,” the curse causes you to clench around him as he smirks. 
    “My sweet, sweet, sweet girl.” His voice is much lower this time around, tone slightly condescending as his hips rock against yours. 
    “Here I thought you were innocent,” he smirks, “but the sounds you’re makin’, oh they are anythin’ but innocent my filthy little girl.” 
    Steve’s words, combined with his deep thrusts have you digging your nails into his lightly tanned back, crescent shaped indents the only reminder of you.
    “Be mine,” he gasps, your eyes shooting open as those words leave his mouth. His lips are wet and parted, ragged breaths leaving them as he trains his eyes on you. 
    “Be mine and I will show you the world,” he promises as his hips stutter inside of you. You nod your head, “yes, yes!” 
    Your words are a double edged sword, a promise and a plea as you feel the white hot pleasure seeping through your bones for the second time that night as your name leaves through his mouth. 
    By the time you open your eyes next the waves have calmed and the moon is now showing her face, stars littering the sky as Steve’s eyes are a muted cerulean shade.  
    “You are my Clementine, sweet like the summer breeze.” 
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haik-choo · 3 years
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how the haikyuu boys confess to you (on valentines day)
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tsukishima:
For once, Tsukishima cares. He cares about your reaction, your words, your expression, your feelings (about him) -- just this once. It’s because of he pressure of your actions weighing down on his heart like an elephant on an orange that he plans. He made sure he got your favorite flowers, he has the specific type of desert that you like, he’s wearing the shirt he got when he thrifted with you for the first time -- the one that you said “makes him look really hot”-- and he’s at your door. He almost laughs at his reflection in windows of the shops he passed coming here, how pathetically in love he is, how hopelessly enraptured he is by you, a dork who bought him a mug with your face printed on it (”so you can see me every morning in college when you’re grumpy and won’t admit you miss me”). He rings the doorbell and knocks softly, hesitant, at the door. He hears a response come from inside the house and rapid foot steps approaching: He looks up while he’s waiting, pondering about if he’s really going to do this. He could always throw the bouquet of fragrant flowers and sweets down the railing and pretend he was bored and wanted to hang out; but when you fling open the door in your heart-pajamas, hair frizzy and sticking out everywhere, your face slack in shock at what he’s carrying, cheeks aflame and eyes glassy with a sheen of hope.... he decides it maybe isn’t such a bad idea to be so stupidly in love that he bought a bouquet the size of an elephants head.
“Do you wanna be my valentine, dumbass? If you say no this’ll be really fucking awkward. Please say yes.” 
atsumu:
He never planned on saying it. Hell, he never even wanted to hang out with you on valentines, afraid that the words he kept hidden within the trenches of his heart would surface, bubbling and tumbling clumsily out of his mouth. But your text at 9pm on february 14th ended with a little smiley face and he decided to throw his new year’s resolution of stopping hanging out with you everyday out the window. Your smile was too addicting. He knew what he was getting himself into: it was late at night and you were both laughing down the empty streets, the moon hidden and instead a sky freckled with stars hung above. It was too perfect. You were too perfect. All it took was a dumb joke (on his behalf) and your dumb, squawk-like laughter to cause his heart to freeze. He’d never experienced this feeling before, the feeling of his eyes catching onto one image, the image of your face contorted with happiness, his whole body stopping, arms loose by his side, pupils dilated so wide. The words never would have left his lips had he not been drunk on your laugh, for his sober conscious was much too afraid of the possibility of rejection, the fear that your eyes would flit uncomfortably to the side with stuttered words of a pathetic-apology filling the air, his ears, and his heart. But god, his stupid one-track-mind brain couldn’t stop his mouth from moving. He was too far gone, lost in you, that his stupid mouth just couldn’t keep still. 
“I love you, so much.”
sakusa: 
The countertops are littered with bowls of icing and leftover batter, to which sakusa scrunches his nose at. He forces you to clean them, and “clean them properly” while he finishes preparing the cookies to go into the oven. Sakusa feels content despite your loud voice and strange taste in music: for a long while he wondered why your presence both simultaneously calmed him down while sending his heart into a frenzy, but now he knows it’s because he’s caught in the web your love. He doesn’t really mind, honestly, in fact, it makes his heart warm and full. The amount of time he spends with you is shocking, and he does things with you that he does with no one else -- he thought his feelings were more than obvious. But when you glance at his cookie-shaping from your spot at the sink and laugh, saying “Sakusa! you’re really good at baking! your future lover is gonna be so happy” Sakusa can’t help but let his movements stop and eyes stare at you in disbelief. He doesn’t even bother to verbally reply, instead opting to reach over and flick your forehead and go back to putting the cookies in the oven. Your whine doesn’t go unnoticed (”what was that for?!”) but it goes unanswered. After the dishes are washed, and the cookies are living their last few moments in warmth, you and Sakusa lean against the counter, staring at the timer tick closer to 0:00. Out of the blue, your voice softly finds its way to his ears, “I’m so happy. I know you’re picky at who you let into your apartment -- i still don’t know why you let me in -- but, really, I’m so happy. Thanks for tolerating me!” Sakusa just stares. At your face, the curve of your eyelashes, the batter in your hair, the sad smile playing your lips -- and the words flow out effortlessly. Your head whips over to him, and he laughs. “You’re so hopeless, you know that?” and with that, the timer beeps.
“You know it’s you I’m in love with, right? Why else would I let you make a mess in my kitchen?”
sugawara:
He had made up his mind. It was a week before the day of love, and Sugawara had made up his mind. No longer could he pretend that what he was feeling was just friendship, no longer could he hide how he truly, genuinely felt. It makes him laugh, thinking about how he thought he could ignore his feelings and that ,miraculously, one day, they’d disappear into thin air. But now he’s at the rooftop on the school, a pink letter gripped tightly by his clammy hands, and he’s ready. Ready for your rejection, for your acceptance, for your tears, for anything. When he made up his mind a week ago about confessing, he’d also accepted all the possible outcomes. If loving you -- and telling you that he loved you -- meant that everything you two had would crumble right before his very eyes, then so be it. He couldn’t hold his heart back anymore. Every second of every minute of every hour of every day he spent wishing that you were his, and he was yours. Love was messy. Love could hurt. But the worst outcome of love is when you keep silent. Plus, if you shared his feelings, then he might just be the happiest man alive. So, when the heavy metal door of the rooftop opens, exposing your confused expression, and when the wind suddenly starts back up, flipping your hair all around like a dramatic scene from a romance film, Sugawara has his mind made up. Determinedly, swiftly, he stands up. His eyes are glazed with passion and confidence. Calmly, he sticks his hand out, the pink letter with drawn-on hearts and cursive handwriting filling the envelope. When you gently take the letter from him, realizing what this all means, and look back up at him, face flushed, his mouth opens. Sugawara had made up his mind.
“I can’t hide it anymore. I'm so in love with you, I think my heart might explode -- will you accept my feelings?” 
bokuto: 
Bokuto won’t lie -- it took him a while to understand what he was feeling was not normal. ‘Normal’ for friends is spending time together, laughing together, going over to one another’s house and drinking until late. It’s hugging each other sometimes (or a lot, if you’re Kuroo), it’s hoping you always have them by your side. But what he feels for you? it took Akaashi smacking him upside the head and explaining to him what his feelings meant for Bokuto to realize. What he felt for you, was not friendship. He wanted to wake up next to you, he wanted to be the only one who you went out on ‘friend-dates’ with, he wanted to feel your lips on his shoulder, cheeks, lips. He wanted to see you at the other end of an aisle someday, but he didn’t want to be the guest at the wedding. He wanted to protect you, even though you didn’t need protecting; he wanted to hold you, to  indulge in your warmth, to be the only one you held in his arms. He wanted to be buried next to you. “You’re in love with her, you dense idiot. God -- that’s not normal. I mean, do you want to kiss my cheek, be buried next to me?” Akaashi sighed out, Bokuto shook his head, no. “But you want to kiss them? Watch them grow old?” Bokuto shook his head, yes, but slowly. “Well, there’s your answer. Bokuto, you love them.” And that’s when everything clicked. That’s when the lightbulb flickered on, when his eyes widened. God, how dumb was he? And he’s letting you spend Valentine’s day alone? Without thinking, his hand reached for his phone, tapped on your contact (you were on speed-dial), and waited for your voice to ring through the speaker. “Yeah, what’s up, Ko?” He blurted out his words, almost insensitively, not realizing their true weight. The truth made his body feel light, and he couldn’t stop the bubbles of laughter that erupted from his throat -- he felt so stupid. How could he not have figured it out sooner? He didn’t even wait for your response before he started talking again (Akaashi nearly slammed his head on the table), which caused a small smile to break out on your face. Bokuto was so, so stupid. 
“I just realized i love you. Like, really, really, love you. Hold up -- is there a place we can meet up so I can tell you this face-to-face? Wait, where are you? I’ll meet you there! Oh, happy Valentine’s day, by the way!” 
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The Man That Is Wilbur Soot [Wilbur Soot x reader]
Paring: c!Wilbur Soot x Gender neutral!reader
Summary: Inspired by the Song Honey Honey by ABBA aka I took the line "I'd heard about you before I wanted to know some more"
Warnings: Fluff?
Words: 3.4K
Masterlist: Wilbur’s Masterlist - Event Masterlist - Full Masterlist
A/N: This was made for my ABBA event. Check it out here! (Also requests are still open! Click here!) btw, this was supposed to be like 1k
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
You had heard about Wilbur Soot before. Everyone had heard about Wilbur Soot the President of L’Manberg. The guy who stood up to the Tyrant Dream of the SMP. And came out victorious, unlike the others whose life has been lost to the Tyrant, and their names to the passage of time.
You can’t say, he didn’t intrigue you enough, for you to set out on the dangerous journey that is crossing the SMP. Because he did. His country did. The ideals that you’ve heard about did. Everything intrigued you enough to leave your village behind and track into the world.
So that’s what you did, backpack on your shoulders, map in hand. You set into the big world, on the tracks to the dangerous country that the SMP is. You barely get out of the village before you are able to hitch a ride.
It’s a merchant that is headed for one of the villages closer to the border. It’s a bigger village than your own. The name rings a bell, maybe a traveller has mentioned it when passing by. So you hitch the ride, he tells you about his trades. He’s a merchant of fabrics, listing many places you haven’t even heard of. But there is one that catches your attention.
“You’ve been to L’Manberg?”
“Before it became independent yes.”
“Tell me about it!”
And the merchant does, for the entirety of the ride. He talks about the few people that resided there when he passed through the back then settlement. You beg him to tell each detail he can remember. And he happily provides. You take note of every you hear in your notebook. Your travel journal. Your… well diary.
He’s a good man, you note to yourself when he pulls into the bigger villages. The sun on the horizon.
You’re much further than you thought you would be on your first day.
This is going to be a good trip.
---
This is going to be a horrible trip.
You’ve been wandering for days, the closer to the border of the SMP, the fewer carts had come by, and even fewer willing to take a traveller with them.
You sigh as you watch the sun starting to set, and you are forced to make camp once more. It has been days since you last slept in a bed. To be exact 16 days. You had only managed to stay in an inn for the first night, realising your small amount of money wouldn’t get you far if you spent it all on beds.
You are reminded of the people whom you met that first night, a girl who talked about how President Soot had come by the town in his own travels to the SMP, and she had met him. No not just met him. She had spent the night with him.
And you just couldn’t help yourself, you had to quill your curiosity somehow, so you had once again asked for details, and she had provided.
The fire you get going is better than the last one. Not that the last one had ever turned into a fire. It had rained in the morning, and most of the wood you could find yesterday was still wet by the time you wanted to settle down.
But today, you had been lucky, it had been sunny all day, leading to being able to find dry sticks and a couple of pieces of logs. That you could make into a fire.
A clear stary night over your head as you turn in for the night. Hoping to get at least a couple of hours out of the fire to keep you warm. And to keep the mobs away. Knowing you still have a couple of days of wandering left before you will reach the borders of the SMP. You sigh as you jolt down the few interesting pieces of the day in your notebook.
Not that anything of importance actually happened. But maybe out there someone would read your notebook and find the fact that you saw a parrot in a birch forest be found interesting.
---
You have under half a day of walking left when a cart is willing to pick you up. Turning the hours of walking into a mere hour in the cart. You can feel yourself squirm in your seat as the silence falls upon you and the woman who picked you up.
“…So… Why are you heading to the border?”
She lets you sit in silence.
Rude much?
But… You can’t really call her rude, she was nice enough to pick you up and take you to the border. Where she very unceremoniously dropped you off, and headed off east, seemingly following the border never crossing it. She was… weird.
You instead tighten your back, and head over to the guarded tollbooth. A man looking bored out of his mind and close to sleep sits there. Not even having registered the cart that was there moments ago.
How often do people come through here?
The thought crosses your mind. You know it isn’t one of the main border entrances. You know of one that lies further west. But still, a good 2 to 3 days travel away. Besides you’re pretty sure someone told you the toll at the busy entrances is higher than the ones people rarely use.
But now that you are here and can read the price yourself. It seems the person had either lied to you, or the price at the main entrances are a lot higher than you could ever think about paying.
An idea strikes you, maybe… Just maybe… The guard will fall asleep. Just maybe. You linger on the side of the road. Seemingly interested in the plants nearby. You start jotting down stuff in your notebook. Taking note of the size of the leaves, the colour. You mumble the information to yourself.
Your eyes keep glancing over, as his head slumps down further and further.
It barely takes you a few more minutes of stalling before the guard is full-on snoring. You barely catch yourself nearly letting out a sound in victory.
Silent. Right. No noise.
You can do this. You can sneak past him. You can be silent.
You suck in a breath, as you start moving as slowly as you’ve ever done in your life. Hoping to the sky gods the slowness helps you with being silent. And it does, to some extent. But your backpack still rustles around, and the loose stones on the pathway still skirt across the dirt.
But he keeps sleeping, and before you know it, you’ve managed to sneak past him. Sneak into a country. You did it!
You decide your celebration is best celebrated far from here, and you make your way on the now stone path.
---
It takes you a couple of days before you hit your first village. You’re surprised by this. Normally there is a city around half a days’ time from most border crossings. But this is the SMP. The fact that its citizens aren’t exactly allowed to leave. Is more than public knowledge in other countries. They are under the rule of a Tyrant after all.
You figure it’s time to sleep in a real bed, you deserve it.
You head straight into the in, it’s barely past lunch, but there is a plentiful of people in there already. You stumble a bit at the sight, you had expected a couple of patrons, not a room full of people. But nonetheless, you make your way to the bar.
Conversations bustling around you, a waiter running around, and either the innkeeper themselves behind the bar, or just a barkeeper. You aren’t exactly sure. But you wave them down anyway. Maybe she can help you find the innkeeper and ask for a room.
“Well, hello there, you look exhausted.” Your shoulders sink further down at the comment. Did you really look that bad?
“I was wondering if you had a room I could rent?” you ignore the rude comment and stick to politeness.
“I figured.”
“… So um… Do you have a room free?” You try once again.
“Sorry hun, but if you hadn’t noticed we are full right now.” You completely deflate at the answer. In return, she takes pity on you. “But if you ask around over at the stables, someone might let you on as a passenger and take you to the next city. It’s half a day by cart, so you might just catch one if you’re fast.”
You beam up that answer, profusely thanking her, before running back into the street. Before realising you have no clue where the stables are.
It takes you two people, and three wrong turns to find the stables. And nobody is preparing any carts when you get there. Just a guy saddling his own horse.
Ah well, it never hurts to ask.
You approach the guy.
“Hi!”
He looks a bit confused when you stand across from him, on the other side of the horse.
“Um… good evening?”
You smile at him.
“Can I help you?” He speaks slowly.
“Ah yes! Sorry! I’m a bit out of it. I’m trying to get to the next town over.” You happily tell him.
“And you’re telling me this because…” He trails off. Leaving time for you to answer, instead, you leave him hanging. Until he coughs.
“Because…” He repeats.
“Because I was thinking, maybe you were heading that way.”
He raises an eyebrow.
“I can pay…” You try.
“Well then, why didn’t you start with that.” He looks you and your baggage up and down twice before clicking his tongue. “We can make this work. Do you know how to hold on?”
You nod, and he settles onto his horse, waiting for you to do the same. You manage to hoist yourself up and onto the horse. It doesn’t even flinch at the added weight. You’re thankful to the sky gods for that.
He rides the two of you out of town and onto the road for the next town.
“What’s someone like you this far out in the country?”
“I’m a traveller.” You tell him.
“To the border? So you could look at it and head home?” He snorts.
“No no, I’m not from the SMP, I’m just travelling through. I’m headed to L’Manberg.” He snorts once more.
“L’Manberg? That bunch of spoiled brats.”
“Spoiled brats?”
He laughs this time.
“Don’t you know?”
“Know what?”
“You truly aren’t from these parts.” He comments, and let the conversation fade out after that.
You don’t question the man, instead just pays him as the sun starts to set, and you are once again in an unfamiliar village. At this point, you barely remember the route you used to take in your home from your house to the baker.
Okay, that’s a lie, that is a route that is embedded into your mind, that you could sleepwalk it. For the sole reason that the route had you pass the library. Which was a place you spent a lot of time. Especially after finding out about the interesting man of Wilbur Soot.
Some books portrayed him as a traitor of the SMP, others the hero of the folk. But every single depiction had one thing in common. That he was an interesting enough man for people to want to write about him.
And that made you interested in him. He had started a revolution in a country that wasn’t his. You weren’t sure where he was from. None of the books in your village had mentioned that.
You head into the inn, this time, it’s bustling from evening patrons, but nowhere as lively as the one in the previous town. The reception this time has a separate table. Which you welcome happily. This means you don’t have to cross another sea of half-drunken people you don’t know.
However once again, the inn is full.
What’s going on here?
This one is even larger than the other one and seemingly has fewer patrons. But you take the rejection with a head held high. Thank them for their time, as you head into the now dark streets.
You sit now on a couple of steps, you’re tired, exhausted, and just want to sleep in a bed.
The door opens.
You nearly leave your skin in shock. You had expected the owner to be asleep. Instead, an elderly lady stands there.
“Would you look at that? It seems I have a guest.” She speaks.
“No no, I’m just passing through, I’m sorry I just needed to rest for a moment. I’m sorry. I’ll be on my way!” You ramble on as you scramble from the stone step.
“Nonsense.” She tsks at you. “Come in you poor child.”
She steps back into the house, leaving the door open.
“You coming? Close the door after you, it gets so terrible cold at night.”
You find yourself following her. Closing the door after yourself. You carefully put down your backpack as she ushers you into a seat in the kitchen. Setting a plate of hot steaming soup in front of you. You nearly drool at the sight. You can’t remember the last time you had warm food. Especially not warm homemade food.
You are quick to dig in, and she laughs warmly at you. You feel comfortable here.
“Why were you out in the street this late? That’s no safe place to be.”
You stop the spoon still in your mouth. She laughs once again, but the kind air around her never leaves. You swallow and pull out the spoon.
“I’m making my way to L’Manberg.” You tell her.
“Ah, L’Manberg. I’ve heard about that place. President Soot right?”
“Yes, yes.” You nod at her. “Wilbur Soot.”
“Ah, the Antarctic prince.”
You stop once again.
“The what?”
“The Antarctic Prince?”
You hum.
“Ah my dear, President Soot is the second born of King Philza from the Antarctic Empire.”
You stare at her; this was new information. She laughs once more. You are quick to grab your notebook and write down the new information. How had something this important not been mentioned before? This explains so much to you. And it eagers you even more to continue the trip.
The man of Wilbur Soot only seems to keep getting more and more interesting as each day passes.
The kind lady offers you a bed and a bath.
You are more than happy to receive both. Although you would never admit that to anyone that you could barely recognise yourself in the mirror. And for the second realisation that night. You understood why the innkeepers didn’t want you around.
You’ve never slept as good as you did that night during your travels.
---
You stretch as you can feel the scorching heat of the sun above you. It has been three weeks since you left the kind lady. She had asked for her son to help you move deeper into the country, so you were closer to the border you are desperately trying to reach.
You had travelled with her son for about a week, when he had to start heading more west than south, you had thanked him as much as his mother. But he had brushed you off that having a travelling partner was nice, and that you if came back through he would love to hear stories of the famous L’Manberg and its citizens.
The map you had brought seems to not be well mapped in the SMP. It wasn’t something you were unprepared for, but it did surprise you how little it truly resembled the mapping of the roads.
But a map is a map, and a destination is a destination. So you head onwards.
And onwards…
And onwards…
And onwards…
Sometimes meeting other travellers now that you are deeper in the countries. The nights where you aren’t alone passes faster than the ones where you are.
You hear stories of L’Manberg you have never heard before, and retellings of events but in other perspectives.
It seems a lot of people have a lot of opinions on the small country. But you understand, you too would have a lot of opinions if a city suddenly started wanting independence from its country.
It takes you weeks before you start coming across people who have been near L’Manberg regularly. It gives you a sign of hope. You’re getting closer, your journey is reaching its destination.
---
It’s storming the day you spot the country on the horizon. It’s still storming by the time you reach the country. The SMP toll guard is seemingly nowhere nearby and you pass the border with ease this time. Luckily for you. Or else you would have to explain why a traveller like you didn’t have travel papers.
You had expected to be met with one of the cities of the small country immediately. But it seems they are further from the border. And by further, it takes you an hour at foot-travel to meet the capital of the small country.
The streets are bustling.
That’s when it hits you.
You’ve made it.
You’ve actually made it.
You might look mad, but you let out a laugh right then and there. A laugh of relief. A laugh of victory. A laugh of … being alive.
“Having fun there?”
You turn around, to be met with the eyes of a stranger. A tall brown-haired stranger, nonetheless.
“Yeah, I just… Yeah.” You trail off. You eye him up and down, he’s cute. You put your hand out to present yourself, your name, the country you came from, and the name of the village you used to live in.
“Wilbur Soot, President of L’Manberg.” He returns with a smile. You barely listen to his words. Too captured by his smile. When…
Oh.
Oh, sky gods.
This is the man.
This beautiful human being of a man is the man.
“You alright there?” He asks as he watches you falter for a moment.
“Yes, yes, everything is fine. More than fine actually.” You tell him.
“Are you sure?”
“Absolutely.” You smile at him, and he smiles back.
“So, what are you doing here? You are an awful long way from home.”
He starts walking, and you fall in step with him.
“I’m here to see the country. I’ve heard a lot about it.” Leaving out the unsaid, I’ve heard a lot about you. He didn’t need to know yet, just how intriguing you found him.
You follow him down the street as he points a couple of things out, a couple of buildings, a couple of people. You listen and stop to note something down a couple of times, and he waits, patiently. Until he leads you to the local inn.
He holds the door open.
“A drink?”
“Yes please.”
He finds the two of you a booth, and you easily fall into conversation.
He asks you about your hometown, you about his.
He asks about your journey, you ask about the revolution.
You continue this game of ping pong. And the further down your drinks you get, the more personal the conversation gets. The less you note down. Yet, the man himself never falters from being the most interesting thing you’ve ever encountered.
And the night moves along, your conversation following.
You don’t really know when his hand landed on your thigh. Or when your lips met his. But suddenly you’re stumbling into a room together.
His touch setting you on fire, and your touch egging him on.
Your head is spinning as your back hits the bed.
Your notebook is lying tucked away safely in your backpack, staying there all the way into midday when you finally wake up. Disorientated, confused, and hungover.
Sitting there in that bed, you can’t help but remember the words of the girl you met the first night. And you can’t help but agree with her. Wilbur Soot surely is a love machine.
You hear rustling beside you, and you turn your head.
He’s awake.
He’s watching.
He’s watching you.
You lazily smile at him.
And at that moment, there is nowhere else you would rather be.
You had heard about him before, and you wanted to know some more.
People later down the line found your meeting story anywhere from boring to fate. But one thing was sure, you entered L’Manberg with one goal in mind. And never left again.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
211 notes · View notes
eternalsimp · 3 years
Text
Cursed Fears (pt 3)
Genre: Hurt/comfort, smut
Word Count: 5117
Warnings: NSFW 18+, aged up Megumi, swearing, use of female pronouns and anatomy, very jealous Megumi, rough sex, praise kink, overstimulation, slight orgasm denial, some degradation, spanking if you squint, oral sex (m. receiving), marking. Minors DNI.
Author Note: This is the final (?) part of a JJK mini-series I did but it can be read as a stand-alone. Parts 1 & 2 are up on my blog (IDK how to make links)
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You were pulled from sleep with the sound of your phone vibrating on the bedside table next to you. You crack your eyes open to take in your surroundings for a minute and try to ignore the insistent buzzing of your phone. Mid Morning sunlight is streaming through the open window, casting a blanket of warmth in the otherwise cold room. Megumi's divine dog has moved off the bed and is laying under the window where it can’t be disturbed by the light. Megumi has his face buried in your neck, arms still wrapped tightly around your torso, and you can feel his warm breath fan out against your skin.
Your phone starts to ring again and you carefully move to grab it, trying not to disturb your sleeping boyfriend. You turn it to see Nobara’s name and picture displayed across your screen and debate sending her to voicemail. You decide against it, knowing she would just call you again.
“Hello?” You stifle a yawn and hear Megumi grumble incoherently behind you.
“Y/n! I’ve been trying to get a hold of you all morning! Are you avoiding us?” You pull the phone away from your ear to try and escape her scolding. You turn your attention to the clock on the bedside table showing that it was a little after 10 am.
“I was sleeping, I’m not avoiding you, psycho. And who is us?”
“Oh yeah, Itadori and I are hanging out. We are actually pretty close to where you and Fushiguro live which is why I was calling. Wait, didn’t you have class this morning?”
“I’m kinda playing hooky, Megumi, and I didn’t go to bed until pretty late and I wanted to sleep in.” Out of annoyance, Megumi grabs your phone out of your hand and rolls onto his back before pressing it to his own ear.
“What do you want Kugisaki?” His voice is still heavy with sleep, and you would normally swoon from how deep it was, but you were too distracted by him interrupting your conversation. You roll over to lay your head on his chest and nudge the phone away from his face to click the ‘speaker’ button so you can hear what Nobara is saying.
“... and you’ve been hogging all of my best friends' time lately so what I’m thinking is you and Itadori can hang out so her and I can have a girls day.” You can hear Yuji in the background correcting that you were both of their friends and he wants to hang out too.
“Well seeing as how we are both still in bed, it’s probably gonna be a while,” Megumi says flatly, probably hoping she’ll drop it and be content with just Yuji’s company.
“Ooohh, am I interrupting something fun?” You can hear her words dripping in sarcasm, wanting to fluster you and Megumi. Your boyfriend however decides he has other plans.
He cocks an eyebrow down at you, “yeah actually you are,” and pinches your thigh to elicit a sharp gasp from you. You bolt into a sitting position and feel your face heat up with embarrassment. Nobara is sputtering on the other side of the line and you swat his hand away from you as he sits up too and tries to pull you back against him.
“Megumi Fushiguro! Give me that!” You snatch your phone back and shove him off the bed, his body landing with a hard thud on the floor. “Sorry, he woke up in a bratty mood apparently.”
“Fushiguro? Being playful? I never thought I’d see the day!” Nobara snickered over the phone. You leaned over the side of the bed to see Megumi pouting at you and you stick your tongue out at him childishly.
“It’s a blessing and a curse. Anyways, give me like an hour and we can all meet up for lunch or something.”
“Yay! Let me know when you leave and we can find somewhere to meet in the middle!”
You hang up the phone and Megumi lunges off the floor and tackles you onto the bed. He rolls the two of you so he is laying on top of you and you are effectively pinned under his body weight. He lays his head on your chest and wraps his arms around your waist as you struggle to push him off of you. “I just wanna spend like ten more minutes in bed with my beautiful girlfriend.” He turns his face up to give you a pleading look and you sigh in defeat.
He grins triumphantly and rests his head back on your chest. You run your fingers through his dark hair to smooth it out as much as you can where it had been ruffled from sleep. After you feel satisfied with the strands you can reach you start tracing over the contours of his face, appreciating how angelic the light from the window makes him look.
Feeling your movements still, he cracks an eye open to see you staring at him. He narrows his eyes accusingly at you, “why are you staring? Weirdo.”
“Cause you’re pretty,” you hum contently and kiss his forehead. He buries his face into your shoulder and groans.
“You make me sound like such a girl.”
“Boys can be pretty,” you pull his face between your hands and kiss his face. “You’ve got pretty eyes, and pretty lashes, and a pretty mouth, even if there's a lot of sass coming out of it.” He rolls his eyes, moves to lay higher up on your body, and stuffs his face into the pillow next to your head. You laugh at the way the tips of his ears turn pink with embarrassment and decide to let up on your teasing.
After a lot of pouting and complaining from your boyfriend, you finally pull him out of bed and convince him to get dressed to go to lunch. You tuck a loose burgundy sweater into a pair of black high-waisted leggings, smirking at the way you catch Megumi staring at how the pants hug your curves. He layers a dark blue windbreaker over a grey hoodie and a pair of jeans. Both of you opted for sneakers since you figured you’d probably be walking around a lot.
He pulls you into a hug and makes his last attempt at talking you into staying home and watching a movie instead. You notice he gags slightly at the smell of your perfume before quickly trying to cover it with a cough. You make a mental note to buy a new one while out with Nobara before denying his request to ditch your friends. He rolls his eyes, gives you a firm peck on the lips, and leads you out the door of your home.
The ramen house Nobara and Yuji decided they wanted to try is in a large shopping district walking distance from your apartment, so you and Megumi decided to enjoy the nice weather after the storm. You barely register the sound of Yuji's voice before you are being spun around by your overexcited friend. “Be careful before you break her!” You can't help but laugh at how Nobara scolds him before he plants you firmly back on the ground but still holds you in a bruising hug.
“Yuji, I just talked to you last night!”
“Okay, but I still haven’t seen you in what feels like forever cause you’re always at school.” Yuji pushes his lip out in a pout before finally releasing you so you can hug Nobara too.
“Well, I’m sorry I have to go to stupid, normal person university cause I’m not cool enough to be a cursed energy user.” You reach out and pinch Yuji's arm causing him to flinch back away from you and pout harder.
“Trust me, I’d kill to be at a normal school.” Nobara pipes in and lightly pushes your arm jokingly. You laugh her off and turn to notice Megumi is tense and lost in thought. You tug at his sleeve to regain his attention and motion to continue your walk. He laces your fingers together and pulls you closer to him.
On your way to the ramen house, you and Nobara stop in a few shops to look around and you pick up a few things here and there. The boys mostly stayed outside in the sun and talked amongst themselves. After ducking inside one of the stores you quietly warn Nobara not to tease the boys too much today. “Nightmares again?”
“Yeah, it’s the first one in a few months but it was a bad one, just keep that between us though.”
“Of course, it’s good that he’s getting better.”
“Yeah, I’m trying to help as much as I can, but I don’t know if it's actually effective. I know they’ll never fully go away but it just hurts to see him in pain like that, you know?” Nobara nods and links your arms together as you move through the little shop.
“It’ll keep getting better, don’t let the bad nights get you down.” You smile at your friend before paying for your items and heading back outside.
When you and Nobara rejoin the boys outside, you find them complaining about being hungry and decide to actually go get your lunch. You’re all seated at a booth, you and Nobara are sitting next to each other and since Yuji insisted that he wanted to sit next to the window, he is across from you, leaving Megumi to sit across from Nobara. You smile at him apologetically but he shrugs it off and texts you from under the table to say that it doesn’t bother him.
It felt good to laugh and catch up with your friends until an old classmate of theirs showed up halfway through your meal. Megumi's eyes widen at the figure that slides into the booth next to Nobara. “Zenin? What are you doing here?” You eye her suspiciously but say nothing and continue eating your food.
“I told you, call me Mai. You make me sound the same as Maki,” she pouted at your boyfriend. You roll your eyes and Nobara huffs next to you. Mai turns to glare and notices Yuji trying to engage you in a conversation again. “Well, this is cute. Did the half-cursed monster and the normie finally get together?” You whip your head to her to ask what she's talking about, but she's speaking again before you can open your mouth.
“I mean it would make sense, you did like her first. Why did you never say anything?”
The table goes deadly quiet. Megumi is staring at Mai in horror, Yuji is shifting uncomfortably in his seat. Mai smirks at the tension she created and you can’t help but look back and forth between the two boys.
“Did you feel bad and let poor little Fushiguro have her?” She shifts her attention back to the man in front of her and continues. “Must be scary knowing he could probably take her back with a snap of his fingers, not that she’d last very long. I’d give it a week until Sukuna kills her.” Megumi lowers his eyes to the table but stays silent.
“Food for thought kids, I gotta go.” She winks at you and Nobara before making her exit. You try to reach for Megumi's hand across the table but he pulls away from you quickly.
“Megumi, she’s wrong,” you tell him gently.
“It’s fine, I’m fine.” He’s shaking his head and trying to brush you off. “I’m okay, it’s nothing.”
The air around the table is awkward for the rest of lunch, but you try to continue your small talk. Things take a turn for the worse when the waitress brings two separate checks. One for Nobara and Megumi, one for you and Yuji. Nobara flags her down to tell her that a mistake has been made with the check and can you split it differently. She apologizes and says she mistook your group for two couples. You all pay for your food, Megumi quickly snatching your individual check and paying for your lunch, before you start sliding out of the table.
When you get to the edge of the booth, Megumi is yanking you to your feet by your elbow. “I don’t feel good, I wanna go home.” He says shortly before turning to walk out of the restaurant. Yuji is avoiding eye contact and hanging his head in either shame or embarrassment. You can’t quite tell. You mumble a quick apology to Yuji and Nobara before following your boyfriend outside. He grabs your wrist tightly to lead you back to your apartment.
You’d seen him get mildly jealous, but never quite this bad. The walk was fast-paced, you were having a hard time keeping up with his tall frame. You were certain that the grip he had on your wrist was going to leave bruises. You tried to catch his attention a few times and pull your hand out of his. “‘Gumi please, you're hurting me.”
That sentence finally catches his attention, but only a little. He lets go of your arm and mutters a quiet “sorry” before shoving his hands into his pockets. The rest of your walk is doused in an uncomfortable silence before you finally get back to your apartment. Megumi pulls the keys to your front door out of his pocket before stepping aside to let you in first, you can almost feel his anger rolling off of him in waves. You slip off your shoes and place your purse and shopping bag on a countertop before you are roughly grabbed and pinned against the door.
Megumi squeezes your jaw firmly, his mouth crashing against yours brutally. You tug at his wrist with one hand, he loosens his grip, but never removes his hand from your face. His other hand is fixed on your waist as he continues using his body weight to keep you pressed against the door. Your brain feels fuzzy from his sudden attack and you struggle to get your head to catch up with your body. Out of pure instinct you tilt your face up towards his to deepen the kiss and just as you think you’ve gained some ground he’s pulling away.
A weak sound of protest comes from your throat and you open your eyes to see his own morphed into a dark midnight blue. You feel him tighten his grip on your face as he leans in just enough that you can feel his breath on your lips. Your focus is pulled away by his other hand slowly snaking its way from your waist into the waistband of your leggings. You feel your breath catch at the feeling of his fingertips making their way further down to your core. You hear him chuckle darkly.
“Look at you, I hadn’t even touched you and you’re already soaking. Could Yuji make you this wet from just kissing you?” You could barely hold yourself up, let alone form a word, all you could do was shake your head. Normally he would find that endearing, but he obviously wasn’t in the mood for silence tonight. He nipped your bottom lip almost painfully. “I need words pretty girl.”
“No, just you.” You were tugging at the front of his shirt, desperately trying to ground yourself.
He smirks dangerously and bit down on your bottom lip again, earning a sharp gasp from you. “I didn’t think so.”
You try to close the gap between your lips but he pulls back and shoves your face to the side so he has access to your throat. He latches on to the weak spot behind your ear and sucks like his life depends on it. He proceeds to cover your neck with dark bruising marks before pushing your sweater down your shoulder so he can continue to mark his territory.
“‘Gumi,” you try to reach him but he’s in his own headspace. You barely have time to brace yourself as he suddenly breaks himself away from you body and yanks you up over his shoulder. You land roughly, clinging to the back of his shirt to keep from falling, and it feels like the air has been knocked from your lungs.
He doesn't give you time to catch your breath before he’s striding into your bedroom and throwing you down onto the bed. Your body bounces at the impact and he’s climbing over you before your body can settle. He grabs your hands and pins them above your head and stares you straight in the eyes.
All that can be heard in the apartment was the whipping wind outside the window and the deep breaths emitting from both of your parted lips. You take advantage of the moment to fully take in his face. Your normally gentle and loving boyfriend was nowhere to be found. In his place was a man riddled with jealousy and intent on taking his frustration out on you.
The moment is broken when he drops one of his hands from your wrists to pull up at your sweater. You do your best in this position to arch your back up so he can pull it off. He momentarily lets go of your hands so he can fling your sweater onto the floor before his hands resume their post.
You close your eyes at the feeling of his lips kissing their way down your chest. He takes one of your nipples between his teeth and bites down lightly. Your body rises from the bed in an attempt to bring him closer to you. One of his hands comes down to shove your waist back down into the mattress and once he’s done assaulting one of your nipples he moves to the other. He leaves bruising marks everywhere his lips go and you feel as they make their way further down your waist. Everything feels heightened with your eyes squeezed closed.
“Megumi please,” you breathe out. He leans back up so his face is level with yours.
“Please what? Tell me what you want.” You feel the hand on your waist move down to your thigh. You can barely make an audible sound as he rubs his thumb roughly into the skin of your inner thigh. All you can manage is a weak whine and he scoffs at your feeble attempt at speaking. “Are you suddenly mute, use your fucking words.”
He smacks your thigh sharply trying to get you to focus on him and get out of your head. You let out a small whimper and he rubs his hand soothingly over your warm skin. “You can do it love, tell me what you want.”
How quickly he can switch between how sweet and how mean his words are has your head spinning. You blink a few times before your head clears. “I want to taste you.”
“That's my girl.” He practically purrs.
He releases the hand that was holding yours in place and moves backward to let you climb off the bed. The second you stand up he is tangling his fingers into your hair and shoving you to your knees in front of him. You don’t hesitate to reach up and quickly pull his jeans and boxers down to his knees. You run your hands up his thighs to grab his half-hard dick, giving it a few lazy strokes before taking the tip in your mouth. His hand tightens in your hair and he groans out in pleasure.
You slowly move your head and start taking him deeper into your mouth. Earning a string of small moans from him. “Fuck baby, you’re being such a good girl for me.”
The tip of his cock brushes the back of your throat causing you to gag and push at his thighs. He pulls you off of him to let you take a breath, admiring all the pretty bruises he left across your skin. It takes all his self-control to not cum right then as he works himself back into your mouth. “Just relax baby, I know you can take it.”
The sweet praise that was so familiar to your bedroom activities sends a rush of arousal through you and has you squeezing your thighs together to create the tiniest bit of friction. He continues pushing into your mouth until your nose is flush with his pelvis. Your whine of protest is muffled by him as he holds you against him, not letting you move your head back. Your eyes water at the sensation as you struggle to swallow around him.
“Awe, does my baby keep forgetting to breathe through her nose?” He pouts mockingly at you. You look up at him with tears rimming your eyes and he smirks again. “You just look so pretty like this princess.”
He moves the hand that was gripping your hair to run his thumb against your temple gently before drawing his hips back. You force yourself to relax as much as you can as he starts thrusting into your mouth. You ball your fists tightly, digging your nails into your palms to distract from the achy feeling in your jaw. You flush in embarrassment and the obscene amount of spit collecting at the corner of your lips as he keeps fucking into you like his own personal toy.
Tears are streaming down your face and he cums with a loud groan. You swallow and stick your tongue out to show him. He hummed contently and you leaned back against the bed. You lay your head back and try to catch your breath. Megumi strips the rest of his clothes off and tugs you to stand up.
“Did you think we were done, princess?” He crashes his mouth against yours again and nudges you back onto the bed. “I’m not done until my name is the only thing you can say for weeks.”
Megumi reaches down to thrust two fingers into you, causing you to cry out. His mouth latches onto your skin and starts leaving dark marks everywhere he can reach again. His hand is pumping into you at a brutal pace and you’re trying your best to bite back your moans. He looks up at your face and scoffs.
“No holding back those beautiful sounds baby.” He reaches his free hand up to squeeze the sides of your throat. “I want you to use that pretty mouth to tell me just how good I’m fucking you,” he growls. You nod frantically and he nips at your jaw. Your moans and whines grow increasingly louder and Megumi starts rutting his cock against your thigh for friction.
“Gumi, I’m close,”
“Hold it,” he growls. You look up at him in panic and he grinds the heel of his hand into your clit. “I want to see if you can be good and follow a simple order. If you don’t behave, I will leave you here with nothing.”
You press your face into his shoulder and let out a small whimper. Just when you thought his challenge was hard enough, he slips a third finger into you and purposely crooks them to hit your sweet spot over and over.
“Please baby, I’m sorry. I’ll be good, please just let me cum.” Tears threaten to spill again and he laughs darkly, but says nothing else as he keeps thrusting his fingers into you. He turned his face so his breath could tickle your ear.
“I think my princess just needed a reminder of who she fucking belongs to, isn’t that right?” You nodded frantically against his shoulder. “If you really wanted to get fucked like a whore this bad then you could have just asked me nicely princess.”
Both of your hands were gripping his biceps so hard you thought that you might leave bruises on him. Your climax was so close you could almost taste it, but Megumi's threat loomed in the back of your mind. Not wanting to anger him more you keep behaving and pushing back your orgasm to the point where it’s almost painful. Seeing you struggle to follow his orders underneath him ignited something feral inside your boyfriend, as if he wasn’t dancing on the edge of it already.
“Okay princess, you can cum now.” Your climax ripped through you violently, and you couldn’t help the broken cries it pulled from your mouth.
Before you could ride out your high he is flipping you onto your stomach and yanking your hips up. You scramble to push yourself up onto your hands before he is shoving your face into the blankets.
“No baby, I want you bent over nice and pretty for me. This way I can fuck you exactly how I like.” He pushes himself all the way into you with one fluid motion and sets a hard and fast pace. You are gasping out for him and reaching back to squeeze his wrist. Overstimulation is wracking through your body and you can see black dotting your vision.
You whimper as you feel your next orgasm approaching quickly, and Megumi can sense it too. “Are you gonna be a good girl and cum again?” You nodded your head, and he slapped your thigh, eliciting a cry from you. “I asked you a question, and I want you to use your words like a big girl.”
“I’m close, please let me come again baby.” He smiles and angles his hips to start hitting your sweet spot till you’re seeing stars. Your second climax is less intense than the first, but it still has you feeling completely exhausted. Your head is hazy and you can feel your legs beginning to tremble underneath you. If not for Megumi's firm grip on your hips, you’re sure they would have given out by now.
He reaches around and pulls you up so one hand is wrapped around your throat and the other is wrapped around your waist. His hips never falter their rough pace and your back is pressed to his chest. You can hear and feel him panting in your ear with every one of his movements. Your head is too hazy to focus on anything except him and you let your head loll back onto his shoulder. He turns his head to look at you and smirks. “Look at that, my poor baby got fucked out too hard. I know you have one more in you princess.”
You whine at the promise of another orgasm while he once again latches his mouth on to your neck and shoulders. He lets the fingers on your waist trail down to where you are connected and circles your clit several times. You jolt at the stimulation and weakly try to push his hand away. He smirks and decides to take his taunting a step further. “I wonder what sweet Yuji would think if he saw you like this? Fucked dumb on my cock.”
You barely process his words, but you don’t have the energy to respond. He nips at your jaw as he pushes you closer to the edge. You can tell he’s close with how his pace begins to stutter. With a particularly hard thrust and a pinch of your clit you are coming undone for the final time that night. He cums right after you and gently lays you back down on the bed.
You’re sniffling from overstimulation and pushing his hips away from yours until he pulls out of you completely. You’re finally able to find your words as you curl further into the blankets. “Please baby no more, it hurts.”
You can’t see the guilt that washes over his face as he leans forward to kiss your temple lovingly. “It’s okay pretty girl, you did so well for me.”
He leaves you in bed to move to the bathroom and you think you can vaguely hear water running. After a few minutes he comes back and scoops you into his arms and carries you to the bathroom. He slowly eases you into the warm water of the bathtub before he's running back out.
You lean your head against the wall and let tears continue to stream down your face. A small portion of it is from the dull throb coming from your lower body, but mostly it’s from sadness clawing at your heart. You hate pushing him on his emotions and prying at things he doesn’t want to talk about, however something seemed to really push him over the edge tonight.
He quietly comes back into the bathroom and sets the book you're currently reading on the bench next to the tub, along with a hot tea in one of your favorite mugs. He had pulled on a pair of sweatpants, and was turning to leave again. You reach out and gently wrap your fingers around his wrist. “I know that I’ve asked you to share so much in the last 24 hours, but can we please talk about what happened tonight?”
A look of confusion crosses his face and you sink further into the water. “I just want us to be okay, and I can’t shake the feeling that you’re mad at me.” Your voice begins to falter and he curses at himself. He pulls his sweatpants off and slides into the water behind you and rubs your shoulders.
“I’m not mad at you baby, Mai just hit a deep seated insecurity, and the thing with the waitress just kinda pushed me past my limit. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you like that, I’m sorry.”
You turn to lean your head on his shoulder and let your fingertips trace the water droplets that gathered on his chest. “Why would you listen to anything Mai says? She loves to piss you and Maki off.”
He tucks his chin on top of your head and hugs your shoulders. “Because she wasn’t wrong about Yuji. He liked you first, I always felt like a charity case. And every time you guys hang out, it nags at me at how much better of a boyfriend he would be for you.”
You roll your eyes and flick his nose. “I knew that he liked me, he isn’t exactly the king of subtlety. But you need to remember, Yuji is your best friend, he’d never hurt you like that.”
“I know, I’m sorry.”
You shift to cup his face in your hands. “If I liked Yuji, I wouldn’t have dated you. You’re the one I wanted to be with, not him. I love you.”
He leans his face into your hand and lets you pull him in for a kiss. “I love you too princess.”
355 notes · View notes
orionwhispers · 3 years
Text
Bravado // Tommy Shelby Imagine
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(A/N - its been a long ass time and i wanted to ease myself back into writing but this ended up being long and also super super angsty. sorry that this illness imagine came during covid idk whats going on with my imagination lol. love you guys SO much thank you for always being there. reblogs, comments and likes mean everything to me.)
trigger warnings - LOTS of angst. fluff. implied smut. my hc that tommy has a fear of illness, bad descriptions of hospitals. 
He knew something wasn’t right the minute his car pulled into the driveway and you weren’t waiting for him under the great concrete arch, with that smile on your face that made his knees buckle and heart race like he was a love struck teenager.
You were always there as soon as he came home. Barefoot in a broderie dress in the summer with tousled hair and baby pink toenails. Wrapped in a hand knit blanket with fire flushed cheeks and woollen socks in the winter - even running across the gravel and into his arms in the middle of a storm, the ice cold rain whipping across both of your faces as you kissed under the light of the moon.
No matter how shit his day or week or month was, no matter what stained his hands or darkened his heart, no matter what lay heavy and hard deep in his gut, seeing you made everything vanish in the night air like wisps of smoke. You made everything worth it.
He refused to give into fear, he wasn’t that kind of man, so he swallowed all of the nagging thoughts and apprehensions as he came up to the dark foggy windows and the iron cast door. It felt strange turning his key in the lock without the weight of you in his arms or the sticky peach kisses you left down his jaw and neck, the smell of the vanilla in your hair and lavender on your skin.
The second thing that sent a jolt of white hot electricity down his spine was Mary, watching him anxiously and wringing her hands in the hallway. Usually, she was calm and collected, taking his jacket and leather travel bag with her signature placid smile and gentle fingers. Usually she would return to the kitchen and finish up whatever she was making - a hearty roast lamb with rosemary and garlic and glazed potatoes or a pheasant pie with honeyed carrots, always followed by a three layer chocolate ganache cake that was so thick and rich you practically had to saw through the sponge. She would always have dinner piping hot and dripping with gravy by the time the two of you returned downstairs, no matter how many hours it took for you to get... reacquainted.
Now she looked sheepish and pale, her skin almost translucent under the syrupy yellow lights. There was something about the way she stood, as still as a wraith, that made his blood run cold.
“Mary. Where is she?”
“Mr Shelby, I - ” Her voice was strained and hesitant, like a slowly fraying rope.
“Where is my wife?”
She moved forward, creases forming around her eyes. “We tried ringing you in Liverpool but the hotel said that you had already left, so we...”
“You rang me? Why? What’s happened?” He couldn’t hold back the desperation in his voice, and it lingered and festered around them both like a poisonous gas.
“Mrs Shelby came down with something a few days ago, we thought that it was just a common cold but unfortunately she seems to be getting worse.”
He tore upstairs before he could even think, his shoes leaving perfect muddy footprints on the cream carpet. He almost slipped at the top, and he lurched forward, his hands reaching out and holding onto the portrait hanging above the stairs for stability.
It was the oil of the two of you. A soft, personal picture that revealed more than he ever possibly could. The love in your gazes, the hint of a soft, drunk smile on the dangerous gangsters face as you leaned into him, melting into him like butter, him holding onto you as though he couldn’t bear to let you go. It was his favourite photo, one that always washed a sense of calmness over him, a reminder of the woman that he loved and the way he felt around you. But now he felt as if was riding out a terrible storm.
He lived his life with no fear, he was capable and practical and used to the sound of bullets and the copper sweet smell of blood. There was really only one thing, one terrible thing that he couldn’t control, and that was what drove him crazy.
Sickness.
It gnawed at his insides like a rabid dog, clawed under his skin and settled behind his ribs. Losing someone he loved was like ripping out a piece of his heart straight from his chest, and he knew better than anyone what it was like to lose somebody to a violent, quick death - the pull of a trigger or the smack of a fist. At least in those moments he could lock them away in his mind, he could leap in front of a bullet or crack the neck of any man who dared to get too close to you, but there was almost nothing he could do to stop sickness, and the devastation it caused.
When you first met him it had been a surprise, almost amusing, that this powerful God of a man had these small little quirks. His house was always sparkling clean and smelling of Lysol, his fruit bowls were filled with citrus fruits and round, plump blueberries. He always made sure you were wrapped up warm in the winter, always placing his coat around your shoulders and bringing an extra pair of gloves in case you forgot yours. It was adorable, the way he took care of you,
It wasn’t till a little bit later when you learnt of those he had lost. His mother and his childhood sweetheart taken away from him much too soon. It broke your heart when he told you late one night of the sallow tint of their skin and the way he could almost see them vanishing from earth, the way that illness had moulded and changed those he loved the most.
You understood.
Your best friends older sister had died of tuberculosis when you were young. The elderly woman across the street from your first flat had passed away from a bout of horrendous smallpox. Your brother lost his first child to pneumonia. Times were changing but the fear of disease was ever present. Medicine was improving and so was knowledge, but still there remained a huge, dark cloud of what could happen, one that always hung around your husbands head.
——————————————-
All Tommy could think was the worst as he ran through the landing. His heart was in his ears and his bones felt loose, like the sweet liquorice the two of you would share at the pictures. He came to a stop by the bedroom door, tentatively pressing his palm onto the wood and ever so slightly pushing it open, listening to the gentle creak it made.
The room was warm. The lace curtains were pulled shut, and your favourite lavender candles were flickering on your vanity, casting syrupy shadows against the wall. He exhaled loudly as he saw you, bundled up under a mountain of satin sheets and hand crocheted blankets, your hair splayed across the pillows.
He moved to your bedside, pretending not to notice the large, untouched jug of water and the tissue box next to you, hoping and silently praying that you weren’t sick - just asleep and waiting for him, ready to wrap your arms around his neck.
You were silent, your lips parting every so often as you breathed, your chest rising and falling. He reached out gently, as though he was picking up shards of glass, and brushed his fingers against your cheek. Your forehead was beading with sweat, your cheeks flushed, and yet your skin was ice cold to the touch. He recoiled quickly, his heart dropping like a weight into his gut, and he inhaled a shaky, deep breath.
He saw something curled up beside your hands, a fluffy white cloud with sparkling emerald green eyes trained on him. Despite everything, he smiled. He thought of your birthday - of strawberry cheesecake and champagne, and surprising you with a ribbon wrapped little kitten as you woke up. He thought of that day often. How you smiled and leapt onto him with tears in your eyes, his whole world blissfully quiet as he spent the day in bed with you and your new best friend.
He would have preferred a big dog, one with sharp teeth and a menacing gaze to ward of visitors whilst he was away. But you were drawn to the tiny, malnourished runt of the litter who was scared of his own shadow. A kitten no bigger than the size of his clenched fist. A little white hairball who only ate and drank from fine pink saucers. A cat that had a very frustrating habit of crawling in the bedroom right as Tommy’s hand was up your skirt and his lips on the sweet spot of your neck, the tiny thing mewling and crying until you picked him up and nuzzled him into your chest.
He was a horse lover through and through, and never saw himself having time for any other pets. But in the summer when you saw the litter from one of John’s barn cats and fell in love with the sweet baby who mewled and cried and crawled right into your lap - he knew that he would give you anything and everything you wanted.
Including a cat who refused to accept that Tommy was the man of the house.
“Hello, boy.” He said, leaning over to scratch Comet under the chin, using a voice he only reserved for the two of you. “Have you been looking after my girl whilst I’ve been gone?”The cat meowed loudly in reply, pressing his head into Tommy’s palm but not moving from his spot beside you.
Tommy suddenly felt you shift under him and his heart lurched into his throat. He turned to face you, cupping the side of your clammy face as your eyelids fluttered open, blinking under the candlelight. A rush of red hot heat built up in his belly as you registered him, that angelic smile growing on your face, your tired eyes glimmering with recognition of the man you loved.
“Tommy?”
“Hi, Princess.”
You smiled sadly. “You’ve been gone for weeks - I missed you.”
He felt his brows crease as he rubbed along your jawline softly, trying to stop you from falling back asleep. He felt panic in his throat as sour as vomit, and he tried to bite back the nagging feeling that something was very wrong.
“No, sweetheart, I’m early. It’s only Thursday. I left on Monday.”
“Oh.” You said softly, your voice as gentle as the breeze rustling through the trees outside. “Well let me welcome you back properly - let me make you a lemon drizzle or a...” You lifted your head from the pillow and shuffled under your blanket, but he pressed his hands against your shoulder and held you down.
“No. You’re staying right here.”
“But - ”
“No.”
“Hmm. Don’t leave me, Tommy.”
“Never.” He said, his tone firm and cast like stone. He stroked your hair softly as your breathing slowed, but it didn’t nothing to quell the hard thump of his heart in his chest.
——————————-
Tommy left the room as quietly as he could after you had fallen asleep in his arms. He hadn’t wanted to move, not when you were pressed against his chest, looking ethereal but vacant, sweat beading under your brow and your face lacking colour. He wanted to stay with you, curled up by his side, his fingers laced through yours, the sound of your heart thumping in his ears.
But he was a man of action, and seeing you there - your lips cracked and dry, shudders passing through your body and goosebumps raised over your skin - he couldn’t fight the fiery urge to do everything in his power to make you feel alright again.
He found Mary waiting outside the door, chewing on the skin of her lips and swaying on the balls of her feet in anticipation. He grabbed her by the arm, harder than he meant to and something he would apologise for later, and pulled her downstairs, determined to let you rest whilst he got some answers. As soon as they reached the drawing room he spun her around, clenching his jaw and pointing a finger at the anxious maid.
“Where the fuck is the doctor? Why isn’t he here?”
“Mr Shelby.” She said, stepping forward calmly. “We phoned Doctor Moore and he came on Tuesday to see her.”
“Tuesday?” He seethed. “My wife has been ill since Tuesday and no one called me?”
Mary raised her hands in defeat, making it clear that the decision wasn’t hers to make. “He said it was nothing of concern . He gave her some antibiotics and told her to rest. She asked us herself not to call you, she knows how you.. worry.”
He ignored her sugar coated attempt to quell his anger, but if anything it made his vision darken. “When it’s my wife, It is always my concern.”
“Mr Shelby, we were just doing what we were told. As soon as we noticed she wasn’t getting better we phoned the surgery again, but Doctor Thomas was out for the day and said he didn’t think it was necessary to come round again, so we -”
“I don’t give a fuck. My wife is the number one priority. Ring every doctor in England if you have to, get somebody out here now to see my wife.”
He stormed away, anger pulsating through his veins, but he stopped suddenly, and threw out over his shoulder:
“And call Doctor Moore’s ’office. Tell him to expect a visit from the blinders soon.”
———————————————————
Once, when you were first dating, you found Tommy at the door to your flat at midnight, with scraped knuckles and blood dripping from his nose. You let him in, cleaned him up and sat with him in the bath until his skin was clear and his breathing was even. He knew that night, as you were pressed against his chest and his lips were pressed to your scalp that he was truly, madly and completely in love with you.
He remembered waking up the next morning, love drunk and blissful, and finding the bed beside him empty. He found you in the kitchen, wincing slightly and pressing a hot water bottle to your belly as you buttered a few pieces of toast. He rushed to your side with eyes as wide as saucers, concern lacing the features that were usually ice cold and hard as stone. You were completely baffled as he held you at arms length, his bright cerulean eyes trailing up and down your body for any signs of injury he might have missed. You were bewildered at the sight of the powerful man practically on his knees as he made sure you were alright, and you bit back a giggle as his warm palms spread over your abdomen.
“What is it? Whats wrong?”
“Tommy. Sweetheart.” You said softly, bringing his gaze level to yours. “It’s just - you know - that time of the month.”
He brushed off your embarrassment and ran his fingers through your hair, pressing a uncharacteristically gentle kiss to your forehead, sending a swarm of butterflies around the pain in your stomach.
“Do you need anything?” He asked, half ready to run down to the corner shop and buy any amount of painkillers or chocolate bars or your favourite lavender tea that you might need; not caring who saw the seemingly terrifying gang leader in the street with an armful of strawberry laces and salt water fudges.
You smiled like the summer sun and he melted, pulling you close as you whispered in the shell of his ear that you only needed him, and that was all you ever needed.
That was the first time you fully saw the extent of Tommy’s fear, but it definitely wasn’t the last. He knew he wanted you forever and always, and it took only six months of neck kisses and pillow talk, red hot jealousy and possessive hands across your skin and dancing in the rain and falling asleep under the pale yellow moon for him to put a ring on your finger. You were both consumed by your love, as though it was the only thing that mattered, it was insatiable and powerful - the wonderful mix of the devil and his sweet little angel.
And with that, came the good and the bad.
Like when you got food poisoning after Arthur cooked you a Sunday lunch to cheer you up whilst Tommy was gone. He came home to you retching over the toilet bowl with Mary holding back your hair, and swore that he would kill his brother with his own hands. Or when you slipped on ice and broke your arm while out with friends in London, and Tommy went ballistic and tried to ban you from ever leaving the house. It was just in his nature, how he always made sure you walked on the side furthest from the road, kept an arm slung around you whenever you were together, kept his eyes alert and vigilant no matter where you were - always looking out for his girl.
But he had never been like this.
———————————————————-
You were falling in and out of sleep. Waking up drowsy and heavy headed, squinting under bright lights, an ache in your skull and a burning in your throat. Every so often you felt a pinch in your upper arm, a squeeze on your palm, a kiss on your forehead - but you always drifted back into unconsciousness.
You weren’t sure how much time had passed when you woke up. The room was dark and you could hear the wind howling and whipping rain across the windows. You felt all too hot and all too cold at the same time, and the bed was damp with sweat. You struggled and tried to sit up, your head swaying and feeling as heavy as one of Tommy’s marble statues; as if you had been carved up and moulded. You could hear voices out in the hall, and unsteadily got to your feet, moving towards the noises.
“Pneumonia?” You heard through the thick wooden door, instantly recognising your husbands voice. “That’s impossible.”
“Sir...”
“Fucking. Impossible.” You knew his teeth were clenched.
The other man cleared his throat.“I know that it’s hard to hear, Mr Shelby, but your wife is very sick.”
“Just...” You felt your heart flutter and clench in your chest as the sound of his broken words, could practically feel his desperation and you wanted nothing more than to hold him. “Just tell me how to make her better.”
The second man spoke again, his voice softening and lowering, something you knew Tommy would hate. “Mr Shelby, the first round of antibiotics didn’t work and that means that it’s time for something stronger. Usually I would suggest the Birmingham hospital but I don’t think it’s equipped for...” He paused, trying to think over his words carefully. He wanted to convey the severity of the situation but also didn’t want to risk getting a bullet in his head from your very protective husband. “...This kind of reaction. I recommend we send her down to London for extra testing.”
“London? That’ll take two fucking hours. How the fuck can you recommend letting my wife travel that far? Are you out of your fucking mind?”
“I’m my opinion this is the wisest choice to make, but unfortunately that could mean your wife might get worse before she gets better.”
“Worse than she already is? That’s not an option.”
The man you assumed was the doctor was insistent, trying his best to portray the severity of the situation but failing as your hardheaded husband had already come to a decision.
“I’ll look after her here. She’s safest with me.”
Once Tommy had spoken that was the final result, and the doctor slinked away into the darkness and shook his head. You remained peering from behind the door, your tongue between your teeth and your heart hammering.
Tommy took one look at you and frowned, scooping you in his arms like a baby despite your protests. He ignored you, acting playfully and cheerful but you could feel his heated skin and the see flare of his nostrils. You wanted to help him but didn’t know how, and let him tuck you under the covers once again. He kissed your crown and stroked your hair and you wanted to speak but no words would leave your mouth.
“You stay there this time. You know I have no problem with tying you to the bed.”
You rolled your eyes as he left, and his clenched fists and tightened shoulders told you all you needed to know.
————————————————-
Comet watched from his spot beside you as Tommy wrestled with the fire. He had noticed you shivering despite your high temperature, and bundled you up in blankets whilst sparking matches beside the fireplace. There were raindrops across his shoulders, evidence that he had been outside and to the log store right at the end of the property - a job that had always been for the Groundskeeper. Your precious cat nudged the tips of your fingers as you sighed and watched your husband throw kindling onto the coal, a deep unease settling over your gut.
“Tommy, my love, I’m fine.” It wasn’t exactly true but you felt he needed to hear it. But you could practically see your words wash over him and evaporate like ocean spray.
He was shaking a metal tin in his palm as he worked, and you groaned and let your head hit the pillow as he pulled out two round chalky tablets. You winced as he placed them beside your glass, your mouth already tasting like the sour talc medicine you had come to loathe. He raised his eyebrows and shot you a look that told you he wasn’t far off plugging your nose with his fingers to force you to swallow, and you childishly stuck up two fingers as you took them.
Your stomach rumbled with nausea and you bit back the bile in your throat as you settled into the pillows. You watched your husband as he pulled off his crisp white shirt, revealing his taut tan stomach and the deep ink tattoos that you loved to trace with your fingertips and your lips. There was something about him standing there, with those damn cerulean eyes and hidden muscles, that boyish hair and slender fingers that you wanted desperately around your throat, that made a million tiny fireworks spark inside of you.
But instead you pushed him away from you despite your body wanting nothing but him wrapped all around you. “Don’t get too close. I might have something contagious. I can’t have you getting sick.”
He ignored you, smiling inwardly at the way you always put others before yourself. It was one of the million reasons he had fallen for you. You were sweating out a high fever and shivering in pain, and yet you always thought of him first. He pressed his lips to your temple and pulled you closer, knowing that skin to skin was a way to bring down a fever - even if it meant he had to restrain himself from tugging off your pretty little white nightgown and whatever frilly things you had on underneath.
“I’m not going anywhere. Fuck it if I catch anything.”
“That’s easy for you to say. I’m the one who will have to dote on you hand and foot, you big baby.” You teased, pressing yourself into him playfully, finally giving in.
He held you like a child, trying to hard to soften despite the way you felt underneath him. Everything on him was running a mile a minute, and he couldn’t help but want to try everything and everything to make you feel better. His hand was pressed against your temple to always try and measure your fever, his other palm across your chest to try and count your heart rate.
He could hear Mary treading across the landing carpet but he ignored his anxious maid, instead letting himself be completely consumed by the only thing that mattered - you.
This was something he had to do by himself. He was the only one who could care for you he reminded himself. And he let the words tumble over and over in his skull until they were all he could hear.
—————————————————————-
You had been asleep for a long time.
Every hour, after pacing the length of the hall and sanitising his hands and wiping the beads of sweat above your brow and above your breasts he woke you up and held a cool glass to your lips. You mumbled and moaned and pushed him away but he kept his fingers across your wrist - harsher than he ever had before - and kept you as close to him as possible.
He couldn’t remember the last time he had cooked. Perhaps it was last valentines when the two of you had camped out under the stars, drinking icy white wine and sharing stolen, day drunk kisses. That night he had roasted a chicken over the fire and it had burnt to a crisp as the two of you rolled around the grass, his head buried in your neck as you giggled at the poultry going up in flames.
He was trying now though, easy, plain substantial meals that wouldn’t upset your stomach. Boiled egg and dippy soldiers. Crackers with smooth cheese. Bubbly water and ginger biscuits. Each time he went upstairs you pushed him away, your whole body shuddering and almost retching, and he felt like smashing the plates against the wall at his defeat.
It had been almost thirty six hours since he had come home and it had been almost as long since you had eaten something, and his heart thundered and shattered in his chest when he found you gasping and wheezing over the toilet bowl when you had taken a bite of toast to calm him. He rarely left you alone, only for a few minutes to put the still full dishes in the sink, to ring Lizzie and tell her that he wouldn’t be coming for reasons that he refused to disclose, to smoke a cigarette under the grey stone archway, his shaking hands and bitten fingernails barely visible through the sleepy rolling fog.
He had grabbed handfuls of papers and the brass ink pen you had got him for your anniversary and broke his own rule - bringing work into your bedroom. It had always been a sacred space. For candlelight and soft laughter, aching hands and heart shaped bruises, a sanctuary for him to breathe and to love and to be loved fully in return. But he was afraid if he didn’t have a distraction, he might just completely lose it, and he had to be there for you.
So he sat squinting in his glasses, the room almost completely dark save for a few candles because of the migraines that had started to spread throughout your skull, and let himself be drawn into the mess of squiggly lines and numbers that suddenly didn’t add up, with you still centre stage in his peripheral.
After about forty minutes of rereading the same sentence a dozen times to try and make some sense of it, he heard your voice, like a small crack spreading across a sheet of ice, coming from the bed.
“Tom?” You sounded so weak, he practically flipped your cream vanity as he got to his feet and darted towards you. “I don’t feel well.”
He lifted you as you reached your arms up at him like a child. He almost gasped at the sweat pouring from your body but didn’t want to scare you, and instead held your shaking, shivering body against his own. How could you be so hot, yet so cold at the same time? Your skin was prickled with goosebumps yet you were burning with a fever, and for the first time in a long time, he had no fucking idea what to do.
He left you propped up against the headboard and he entered the bathroom. He ran over to the claw foot tub you loved, twisting the faucet and trying to find the perfect medium between boiling hot and freezing cold. He didn’t want to overwhelm you, just try and soothe your raging fever, and he ignored the shelves of expensive bath oils and scented soaps that you coveted, instead opting for a handful of something meant to ease tension - praying to whoever was listening that it would help you somehow.
There was a brutal, awful moment as he lifted you from the bed, limp as a rag doll, where he imagined what would happen if your heart were to stop. He couldn’t comprehend what it would be like to miss the weight of you in his arms, the smell of your skin, the feeling of your lips against him, the shovels stopping and fading into nothing. It hit him square in the chest, as merciless as a bullet, and he had to lean against the doorframe to stop the two of you from plummeting to the ground.
He undressed himself first. Tugging his white shirt off, sliding off his slacks and his underwear, keeping you as close to his chest as he could. Then he pulled your nightgown up and over your head. He gathered your hair and secured it up with a claw clip so that it was away from your face, the heat radiating off your neck as fierce as the fire now burnt down to ash in the bedroom.
He lowered the two of you into the bath, sinking down beneath the eucalyptus smelling lukewarm water, letting it wash over you both. Your teeth were chattering and you were barely awake. He gathered handfuls of water, letting it drip over your shoulders and pulse points, grabbing a washcloth and running it over your raised skin, hating how you barely registered his touch. As he scrubbed over your collarbones and up to your face he saw your lips had turned to an awful, silvery blue, as vibrant as a fresh bruise. He hissed and tugged on the plug, now determined to get you wrapped up in a fresh towel and tucked back into bed.
You were soft and placid and he helped you out, lacking the usual fire that he adored. Your eyes were glassy and missing their vibrance, like the vanishing spark of a lighter - and he felt miles and miles of invisible distance between the two of you. You were unsteady on your feet and he used his body to prop you up as he warmed your arms with a fluffy white towel. You suddenly stopped, lifting your hand to your mouth as you started to cough - a horrible, dry, gasping cough.
He noticed it almost immediately. His eyes darting to the splatter of red against the white, a smudge of crimson that was as loud and commanding as a siren, a warning signal that something was definitely not right. A bead of scarlet that would linger long behind his closed eyelids.
He managed to get you back into bed, remaining calm as he stroked your hair and kissed your temple. He tucked you under the duvet and waited for your breathing to even before he ran downstairs, his heart thumping in his ears as he practically ripped the phone off of the wall.
“Pol? Fuck. I think - I think I need help.”
—————————————————————-
The room smelt like bleach and metal. Unfamiliar and clinical. There was something hard on your chest and covering your mouth, it tasted like wet pennies and was as heavy as a hand over your throat, but for the first time in days you could finally breathe. You tried to sit up, but there was a needle in your chest, a gown you didn’t recognise cut straight down the middle to accommodate it. You struggled and lifted the thin bedsheet above your shivering torso, trying to look around the cold room.
“Careful!”
It was Polly, dressed immaculately despite her surroundings. She reached out and placed a manicured hand across yours, and you smiled at the woman who had always been a calming influence when you had joined the circus of a family. There was concern in her eyes, rimmed with black eyeliner and lifted lashes but still swimming deep around her pupils. That made you frown, and you moved as much as you could to face her.
“What happened?”
She ran her tongue over her teeth, choosing her words. “You gave us quite a fright, love.”
“I did?” Your memories of the past few days were much like a fever dream, blurry and distorted snapshots were all you could really remember.
“Your pneumonia got worse. A lot worse.” She paused, looking over to the door and you followed her gaze. “They found fluid in your lungs.”
“So...” You started, gesturing to the needle in your abdomen and the breathing apparatus around your head.
She nodded. “Yes. You were in surgery. It was touch and go for a little bit.”
“Really?” You were bewildered. You couldn’t remember anything, let alone having major surgery. You looked her straight in the eye, asking her the questions that had been on the tip of your tongue since you had woken up. “Where is he? Where’s Tommy?”
“He’s outside.” She clicked her tongue, reaching deep into her purse and pulling out some hand cream, gently rubbing your dry hands like she was your mother. You leant into her touch despite all of your questions.
“What? Why?”
“I think he blames himself. God knows what goes on in that mans head. All I really know is he was bloody terrified.” She paused, looking over in the distance. “I’ve never seen him so scared, not even on his wedding day.” She smiled sadly, trying to lighten the mood, but it soon faded. “He didn’t leave your side the whole time you were asleep.”
Your heart thumped in your chest, a soft aching that you knew all too well. “I want to see him.”
“I know you do. But right now...” She stopped right as a handful of nurses entered, clad in long blue dresses with white aprons, hair tied back and smelling of strong soap and disinfectant. You lost Polly in the bustle as one spoke softly to you before tugging on the needle right beside your ribs, your eyes just catching hers as she left, a promise to see you soon on her lips.
It wasn’t her you saw next, but Tommy.
The nurses had cleaned you up with wet flannels and bowls of warm soapy water. Your hair had been braided and your face washed, and walked you arm in arm over to the bathroom so you could relieve yourself. A skittish doctor followed after, his eyes darting across you and his touch gentle as he changed your dressings and took your blood - obviously under strict instructions from your husband, and despite everything, you smiled.
You were sat listening to the clock tick. A romance novel you had been given was dangling dangerously close to the end of the bed, but you were too tired to focus on it. You heard the door squeal softly, and the sound of familiar footsteps across the tiling, each small thud sending shockwaves across your spine.
“Tommy.”
He looked tired. Exhausted rather, as though he had been awake all the hours that you had been asleep. His eyes were bloodshot and his skin was sallow and bruised. His clean shaven face was dark with stubble and his hair was ruffled and unwashed. You longed to reach out to him and cradle him against you, but he stood in the doorway, lingering like a ghost.
“Tommy?” You repeated, your voice almost a whisper, breaking his already shattered heart once again.
“How are you feeling, my love?”
You smiled softly, like spun sugar and sweet honey. No hospital bed or itchy gown could dull your infectious light. “Better now.”
He approached you almost cautiously. He settled down on the hard chair beside your bed and stroked a line down from your temple to your lips, his touch setting you alight like an electrical storm. There was a sadness in his eyes that reminded you of how he got when things were bad, and you willed him to come back to you. His touch was tentative and he inhaled shakily as you cupped his hand with yours, pressing a tender kiss to the inside of his palm.
“Don’t scare me like that. Ever.” He was stern, as though hoping his words would make it true. “I mean it.” He kept his gaze on your pretty face, trying his best not to stare at the harsh bruising on your delicate flesh or the sickly tone of your skin.
“Tommy I’m going to get sick, even you can’t stop that.” You teased gently.
“I can bloody well try.” His hands cradled your face, pulling you into him and kissing you fiercely, still mindful of the wires and tubes taped to your body. There was something about the tenderness and deep longing in the kiss that when mixed with your total exhaustion and love for your husband prompted tears to start falling from your eyes. You sniffled as he pulled away, concern dripping from his beautiful features, his powerful mind wanting to do everything and anything to stop your hurting.
“Hey, hey.” He said, running his calloused fingertips under your eyes and wiping your tears away. You leant into his touch and he kissed your temple, squeezing you even tighter into him. “You know I hate it when you cry.” He toyed with your hair and winked playfully. “Besides, all you need to focus on is getting better. You’re going to have to take care of me when we get home, this week has given me a fucking stroke.”
You rolled your eyes, kissing the inside of his wrist. “You’re a idiot, Thomas Shelby.” You blinked at the clock looming above you both, wanting to stay in your blissful bubble but also knowing that Aunt Pol would probably be in the vicinity harassing a poor nurse over your results. “You should go and find Polly, let her know that everything’s alright.”
He shook his head and nuzzled his nose across yours, an act so innocent that your heart dipped and swooped in your chest. “Later.” He said, breathless and consumed by you. Everything had been too much. Almost losing you had been harrowing, it had punctured him completely and he just needed to feel his girl safe and warm around him. He needed to know that you weren’t found anywhere.
“I just want to stay here for a while. Just me and you.”
You grinned. “Always.”
691 notes · View notes
shushiyuii · 3 years
Note
A giant going out to eat with their friends and getting a tiny in their food that looks more appetizing then the meal.,, (crimeboys??)
ITS TAKEN A WHILE BUT I DID IT, OVER 2K FUCKING WORDS TOO. I REWROTE THIS ONCE ADNJADNAJD AND I HOPE IT WAS WORTH IT LOL /s
Warnings: Soft vore, choking and maybe mentions of fatal? (It's not as bad as it sounds i promise)
Words: 2K+
There was one restaurant known worldwide, known for its delicious recipes from a world-renowned chef, Philza Minecraft. It’s not only known for its mouth-watering meals but also its delightful sweets from their baker, Kristin Minecraft.
Phil and Kristin had met back in their college days in one of the most famous schools for culinary with everyone going there being talented individuals and exceeding expectations of taste tasters across the world, the school’s purpose was to help drive those expectations even further.
Phil was a fine-dining chef whilst Kristin was studying in the baking course. Both had run into each other in coincidence and continued to run into each other since. And well, the two had simply fallen in love fairly quickly, they became the school’s admirable couple. It was love at first sight.
So, you couldn’t be surprised that Phil purposed so quickly after graduation, it was a simple picnic date where Phil attempted to bake a special cupcake for his beloved Kristin. And in the middle of that cupcake was an engagement ring.
They got married soon after, then settled down, started a restaurant together which became known as Tasty Treats. Then came their two little bundles of joy. Wilbur and Techno, they grew up in the restaurant, showing their own cooking talents. But not as much as their parents.
Techno had a particular interest in potatoes, any food he made with his parents had to be made with the ingredients, not that his parents minded this interest. It was just they had no idea why he had an interest in such things.
Techno was more like his father than his mother, and it was the opposite for Wilbur, more like his mother than his father. Although talented with his baking it wasn’t really his main interest, he just helped his mother where he could. His interest was music.
He was often just playing music for the restaurant, his own songs or general music. People noted that Wilbur did have a lot of musical talent, one that was similar to a siren’s lullaby. It was hypnotic, if you heard it, you’d be leered to the restaurant without a choice.
That’s how they met their third bundle of joy.
It was known that Borrowers lived amongst Humans, some being known as family or friends, they were known to live in Human’s walls or under floorboards and such. They weren’t eaten commonly as they used to be since Borrowers had evolved to be resistant to digestive acids.
Tommy had been a young Borrower, a kid living in the restaurant’s walls. He was abandoned by his parents and had grown to be somewhat independent on his own. He definitely wasn’t sneaky or cautious, but he got the job done.
Many of the customers and the owners were aware of a Borrower amidst their walls but they didn’t mind them, since well, the Borrower wasn’t doing any harm to them.
Now how did Wilbur’s music come into play? Well, Tommy would often listen to Wilbur’s music above a loose vent covering in the room. Wilbur was just a teenager and Tommy was just a child at the time.
Tommy was allured to the boy’s music, he found joy and comfort in Wilbur’s music, many had seen him at this point, but he had just become a part of the restaurant at this point, he had yet to be caught yet though.
Wilbur was just happily singing but got called over to help his mom with baking, to which he happily agreed and put his guitar aside by the chair, much to Tommy’s disappointment. Tommy stood up and was about to go back to his little space in the walls when he felt the rumbling in his stomach.
Right, he needed food.
So, he made his way to the kitchen. He stealthily entered the kitchen (as much as he could) and made his way over to the counter, he scanned around for anything to eat and a particular mixing bowl caught his eye and he made his way over to it, without the humans noticing him.
Once he saw the mixing bowl, he was delighted to see that it was a cookie dough mixture, the chocolate chips already in place, all they needed was to be cut into shape and baked. So, before the inevitable happens, he may have helped himself a bit.
But big mistake, “Wilbur! Could you pass me the cookie dough mixture, please? Darling?”, “Yeah! Course Mom!”. The sounds of the humans scared Tommy to a point he fell into the mixing bowl and when he looked up, a wide-eyed human stood above him…
“Mom! There’s a Borrower in the mixture!” Wilbur yelled out in confusion. “What?! Bring it here!”. Wilbur then brought the bowl to the other side of the room where his mother was. He placed the bowl down with Tommy struggling to get out of the mixture.
Kristin peered down into the bowl, her eyes widened as she immediately pulled out the Borrower, it scared Tommy. Was he going to be killed for stealing their food?! Was this his end? Tears stung into the boy’s eyes as he looked away from the human who was holding him in between her fingers.
“Wilbur, pass me a cloth, will you?” The hold then changed to a much comfortable one as he now laid on the human’s hand, “Awe you poor guy, you’re just a kid”. Tommy looked up angrily and with fear, he managed to speak up. “I’m not a little kid! I’m a big man!”.
Kristin's eyes softened and she smiled at the Borrower, “A big strong man, huh?” she asked with playful curiosity as Wilbur handed her the cloth, “Mhm!”. “Well, big strong man. Could you tell me your name?”.
“Tommy…”, “Nice to meet you, Tommy, I’m Kristin”. Tommy looked to Kristin to see a comforting face, it assured Tommy it was safe. Then, Kristin used the cloth to wipe over Tommy and clean him up. And once he was, he got another smile.
“You hungry, Tommy?”. To which Tommy nodded, he was then handed multiple chocolate chips to eat. Whilst he ate, he listened to the two humans’ conversation. “You think this is the borrower living in the restaurant?” asked Wilbur, “I think so”.
The two continued to talk as they worked, Tommy answering questions he was asked and that was show they met.
Now years later, Tommy was a teenager himself helping out in the restaurant. Multiple changes had been made to the restaurant to become a lot more Borrower friendly so their new son Tommy could easily move around.
Yep, Tommy had been adopted by the Minecraft’s so he was now Tommy Innit Minecraft. And he couldn’t be happier with his family.
“Tommy hun, mind taking this over to your father please?”. It was a small pot of seasoning his mother had prepped for his father’s latest recipe. “Yep, Will do Mom!”. He yelled as he grabbed the seasoning from his mother’s hands. He almost lost his balance from the weight of the seasoning but managed.
He made his way over to the kitchen, where his father was with Techno, “Dad! Seasoning!”. He yelled as he almost toppled over from the weight of the seasoning. His father noticed and immediately put everything aside, running over to catch his son.
Tommy landed in his hand and the seasoning in his father's hands. “Thank you, Toms”. Tommy then regained his balance, “Where’s Wilbur?”.
“Dunno”. Techno responded as he stirred the potato stew he was making. “It’s been forever since we’ve seen him! When’s he coming?!”. Wilbur’s musical talent had been recognised and had been offered a scholarship at one of the world's most prestigious music colleges.
He didn’t want to miss out on seeing Wilbur again.
“Tommy! A little help please!”. His mother called which snapped him out of his thoughts, he then ran over to the front to his mom and carried out the tasks given to him.
Now he was stirring a bowl for his mom as the day was almost finished, as they were closing his mind began to wander. Then, the bell before the door rang, it caught Tommy off guard to a point to which he fell into the bowl. “Sorry we’re-“ His mom cut herself off.
“Wilbur!”, She suddenly yelled. Running over to her son and embracing him into a tight hug. “Hi, mom! I missed you!”, he hugged back. “I missed you too, honey!”, he placed a kiss upon his forehead.
Then, Techno and Phil entered the room, “Wil!” his father said enthusiastically as he joined the hug of the two. “Hi dad!”, Wilbur laughed. The hug then broke apart and then he got a ruffle of his hair from Techno.
The four of them laughed, “How’s college been for you, mate?”, “Tiring, but great! I’m having a lot of fun!”. “Good!”. The four continued to converse until silence overcame them, they were all wondering the same thing. “Where’s Tommy?”.
The four then agreed to split up and find the Borrower, Wilbur searched the front kitchen, Techno in the back, Techno the storage and Kristin the serving area.
“Tommy! Where are you!?”, yelled Wilbur as he lifted the lids of pots to try and see if the Borrower was hiding in ingredients again. “Tommy!?”, he yelled again then noticed the out of place whisk in a mixing bowl, with Tommy struggling to breach the surface.
He then picked up Tommy, carefully yet playfully lifted him by the leg. “Well, well, well. What do we have here?” he said with a playful tone. Tommy then began to spit out curses. “Fuck you! Lemme go dickhead!”.
“That’s how you greet your brother after not seeing him for months, Tommy?”. Tommy then stopped his struggles and looked to his brother, “No- I-“. Wilbur then laughed, “Calm down Toms- I’m just messing with you!”.
“Dickhead!”.
“Be quiet Gremlin since you’re covered in batter. I suppose we better get you cleaned up, huh?”.
“Don’t you fucking dare!”
Wilbur then lifted the boy above his mouth, smirking at his brother’s struggles. He then open his mouth, bringing his tongue out to taste him, he licked at the batter covering him, “Chocolate pudding? That’s always been one of my favourites!”.
He then carefully dropped Tommy into his mouth, feeling no struggle, he knew he had permission. So, he closed his mouth and poked his tongue at Tommy. To which his tongue got attacked by the playful struggles and hugs.
He then pinned Tommy to the top of his mouth, swallowing the chocolate pudding. He then opened his mouth to bring Tommy back out as his fingers carefully picked up the boy. Tommy complained as he was brought out of the mouth.
“What, you want to be swallowed?”. Tommy’s poutful expression was enough of an answer. “Alright! Alright!”. Then put the borrower back into his mouth. The once Chocolate pudding turning into a taste of Strawberry and Vanilla.
Soon, after tasting the borrower, he tilted his head back and was about to swallow. When the bang of the door scared the fuck out of Wilbur. “Wilbur!” Techno yelled, “We can’t find Tommy!”. His family soon joined the room.
The family stood as Wilbur almost toppled over, holding his throat and stomach. Tilting his head upwards as he began to choke. “Wilbur?!”, his father then ran over to Wilbur. He grabbed his son’s shoulders.
“T-tom-“. Wilbur choked out, Phil’s eyes widened as he realised what was happening. “Techno! Go grab water!”. Techno ran over to the sink, filling the cup to the brim and running over, handing the cup to Wilbur.
Wilbur gulped the water down, the lump in his throat moving as it finally made its way to his stomach. Wilbur panted as he finally got air into his lungs. “J-Jesus…”. Phil patted his back gently to soothe his son.
“Are you okay?”, he asked. “I-I’m fine”. Wilbur’s hand then suddenly moved down to his stomach, and he stared down at it. “Are you okay, Toms?”. “I almost died! Dickhead!”. Wilbur’s then rubbed his stomach in circles and sighed.
“Tommy’s fine too”. Then, he stood up with the help of his family and made their way home. Once he was in his room he put a hand to his stomach, feeling Tommy comfortably sleeping. ‘Yeah, sleep sounds good’. Then laid back, falling asleep himself.
114 notes · View notes
seoulwhat · 3 years
Text
Wedding OR Not (#12)
Summary: Loving your best friend is a stupid and hard thing to do. Would you be able to allow yourself to let your best friend marry the one he loves so he can be happy?
Pairing: Rowoon x female reader
Genre: slight angst, fluff
Warnings: heartbreak
Word Count: 3.9k
He’s your best friend in the whole world. You love him with all your heart and your whole soul.
Yet…
He has never really seen how much you loved him. You tried to show him through your actions, but all he did was see you as a “friend”. It’s not like you didn’t want to be his friend. Of course, you did. You had known him since you were six years old and were neighbors. You remembered when he would ring your doorbell in the middle of the afternoon, and he would be crying because his dad yelled at him, or his older brother didn’t let him play with his toy car. You remembered in elementary school, he hated the school lunch, so you would always make an extra peanut butter and jelly sandwich and bring it for him. You remembered in middle school when he was bullied for not cutting his hair and everyone called him names, but you were there to hug him during his sad moments, and you were there to make him happy again. You remembered you told him in high school that you loved him and all he said was “I love you too. I hope we’re friends forever”.
So yeah, it did break your heart when he told you that he had been dating this girl and he thought that “she was the one”. But you two are best friends, so it’s a must to smile and be happy for him, right?
But you weren’t.
“I’m so happy for you. How long have you two been dating now?” You asked during a lunch that he kept rain checking. He took a sip of his water and began to speak.
“Actually, I’ve been dating her for a year and a half now.”
You almost spit your own food out and your eyes turned into the size of golf balls. “A year and a half!? Why haven’t you told me?”
All he did was shrug his shoulders and continued to eat his salad as he stared at you while you talked.
“What do you mean, you don’t know? We’ve been friends for how long now. Like forever? Rowoon, we’re best friends.”
Rowoon continued stabbing at his food with his fork and all you did was stare at him, waiting for an answer.
“She’s a jealous person.” He said quickly.
“Jealous? She doesn’t have to be jealous of me.”
“I told her you were my best friend and showed her a picture of you. She got upset and told me that she didn’t want me to see you again. I told her I couldn’t do that. So, we made a negotiation and I promised her that if I ever went out to see you, I would turn on the GPS on my phone.”
You furrowed your eyebrows. Why would he want to be with someone like that? You became aware that your best friend was in a controlling relationship. But why was he still being with her?
“Do you love her?” The question popped out quicker than you could even think.
Rowoon was quiet and he hesitated to answer. “I do,” he nodded. “I think I want to marry her.”
You had imagined that if hearts were made of glass, yours would have shattered to a million pieces. Unfixable.
“Are-are you sure? Shouldn’t you think this through?” You asked, trying to delay his thoughts. You didn’t want him to get married. Well, you did, but you wanted him to marry you.
He shook his head. “I already did. I want to ask her tonight actually. What do you think?”
What I think is that you should get out of this relationship before it turns worse. You should leave her before she becomes more controlling and starts to decide what kind of underwear you can wear and cannot wear. You should leave her because she’s not me. You should leave her because I love you. You should leave her because I would make you so happy and I would never let you go.
“I think that’s a good idea,” was all that you were able to say. You regretted bringing this up in your conversation. It was making you uncomfortable and you were already on a verge of tears. Your throat was burning from holding back all your tears.
Your lunch came to an end, and you were thankful that the conversation did as well. You weren’t sure how much longer you could take listening to him brag about how much he loved this girl. You hugged him goodbye, and he promised to call you to let you know what she said. You weren’t looking forward to the call because honestly, you were already devastated as is.
Once you were home, you made sure to put your phone on sound so you wouldn’t miss Rowoon’s call.
A year had passed and the only thing that kept your mind thinking about things, other than Rowoon, was jogging twice a day and taking daily walks throughout the park. You stopped waiting for his phone call a month after he promised he would call you. You tried calling him, but he changed his phone number, and you had no other way to reach him. You used to know where he lived, until the day you went to his door and an Asian couple opened the door.
At first, you didn’t want him to call you to tell you that she agreed to marry him. Then after the second and third day and so on, you impatiently waited for him to call and say something.
Maybe she said no? Or maybe he just never asked her and broke up with her.
You thought so many things, but a call never came your way to satisfy your curiosity. Like always, you woke up in the morning and put on some comfortable jogging clothes and went for your morning run. On your way back home, you checked your mail and noticed a nice red and white envelope underneath all the junk mail that piled up over the course of two weeks.
To: Y/F/N Y/L/N From: Soon to be Mr. And Mrs. Kim
You knew what it was as soon as you seen the sender. You couldn’t believe it. A year later and you’re barely hearing about this. You ripped open the envelope and took out a folded paper that let loose a couple of I Doconfetti that was inside. The paper was written in beautiful cursive writing, and you wondered who wrote it for them.
We would like to officially invite you to the wedding of Lee Mina and Kim Rowoon.
Please call the number below to RSVP your seat.
This was it. This was it. Tears began falling from your eyes. You felt like you were being dramatic, crying at your mailbox, but you couldn’t hold it in. He went through with it, and she said yes. He’s going to go through with it and marry this girl. You realized that he didn’t love you and you don’t think he ever did and ever will.
You grabbed the rest of your mail and ran inside your home. You slid against your door, your crying continuing. You tried to stop crying, but years of held back tears came spilling out of your eyes. You felt like you were never going to be able to stop.
But you did. A few hours later. You missed your walk in the park and your second jog for the day. But you didn’t care.
You read the invite repeatedly. You didn’t know if you did it to torture yourself or to make sure that the invite itself was even real. Either way, you decided to RSVP. You grabbed your cell phone and dialed the number. Two rings later, a female answers the phone.
“Hi, I wanted to RSVP a seat for the,” you looked at the invite to make sure you got her name right. “Mina and Rowoon wedding.”
“Okay, and can I ask who is calling and how many extra guests will you be bringing.” The female voice was so happy and squeaky, she was beginning to give you a headache.
“It’s for Y/F/N Y/L/N, and I’m not bringing anyone. Just bringing myself,” you said simply.
“Y/N?” The female repeated your name.
“Yes?” You weren’t sure if she was simply repeating your name or if she was going to ask you something.
“As in Rowoon’s best friend?” She said even more squeakier than before.
All you did was laugh. “Uh, I’m not so sure about that. I haven’t spoken to him in about a year. So more like an acquaintance.”
The phone went silent for a few seconds, and you can hear a muffled voice yelling in the background.
“I thought I told you not to invite her!”
“Of course, I’m inviting her! She is my best friend!”
A few yells later and the female began to speak on the phone again. This time, you knew you were talking to Mina.
“Okay, well your seat is officially RSVPed,” Mina said and then hung up. You didn’t even get a chance to say thank you, but you didn’t care if you didn’t anyway.
::
Two months later, spring had the flowers blooming and the cold air was now a warm breeze that you enjoyed. Today was the wedding and you were so happy you went dress shopping a month in advance.
You found a beautiful red dress, since the wedding is red and white themed, and found a nice pair of white pumps to go with it. You drove yourself to where the wedding was taking place and you didn’t know the wedding was going to take place at someone’s rich home until you got there.
So many people whom you didn’t obviously know were there and you felt so out of place. All you did was stand there awkwardly, hoping you would see someone you knew.
“Hey little red,” a familiar deep voice said from behind you. You turned around and was faced with a man dressed nicely in a tuxedo.
“Jaewook?! Oh my goodness, you got tall from the last time I seen you! Which was what? When you were fifteen?” You walked up to him and hugged him. He was now taller than you and smelled a lot better.
“Yeah. Look at you,” he said looking you up and down. “You lost weight and you look so good. Like, you look hot.”
He winked at you, and you swatted his shoulder. Same ol’ Jae.
“So, are you Rowoon’s best man?” You asked him.
He shook his head and gave me an angry look. “No. He chose Mina’s brother instead of me. Who does that?”
That surprised you. Rowoon used to be all about his family and he just ditched Jaewook out of his wedding like that, but all you did was shrug your shoulders.
“I honestly thought Rowoon was going to end up marrying you. You guys were like those two popsicles that come joined together. It was always hard to split you two apart.”
You smiled at the memories that came into your mind, but then frowned. “Yeah, but I haven’t spoken to Rowoon in over a year. He hasn’t called me and when I tried calling him, he changed his number. Then when I tried going to his house, he no longer lived there.”
Jaewook shook his head in disbelief. “This man is so hung up on getting married that he ignored his best friend, moved in with his fiancée, and has her brother as his best man just so he can marry her.”
“Not to mention that he loves her. He’s not just doing this to marry her,” you mentioned. Jaewook wrinkled his forehead and shook his head again.
“I don’t know why he does. Have you met the woman? She is fifty shades of crazy.” Both you and Jaewook laughed and continued making jokes about Rowoon ‘s soon to be wife.
“So that’s what you two do when I’m not around?” Rowoon ‘s voice sounded behind you and your heart began to crash against your ribcage.
“Aw come on Rowoon. We’re just having some fun,” Jaewook said. You still hadn’t turned around yet, scared of your actions and words when you do.
“I don’t consider making fun of my fiancée fun,” Rowoon said angrily. You turned around and made eye contact with him. His face seemed more chiseled, and his hair grew so much longer.
“Hello to you too. Long time no talk, don’t you think?” You said annoyed.
Rowoon ‘s tense shoulders relaxed at your words and his eyes changed from angry to worried. “I’m sorry I never called you.”
You put your hand up as if to cut him off. “I don’t want to hear it. I’m just here to see you marry the one you love, and then I’m out of here.”
“Y/N, hear me out please. I actually really need to tell you something in private,” Rowoon said lowly.
You looked at Jaewook and he raised his eyebrows and walked away.
“What do you want Rowoon?”
“Let’s take this somewhere more private.”
He grabbed your hand and dragged you to the inside of the home. He pulled you up the three-story spiraled staircase and pulled you into a room that looked as if he was getting dressed in it.
You crossed your arms and waited for him to speak as he locked the door. He turned around and ran up to you and hugged you. His body crashed into yours and he knocked the wind out of you. All you did was hug back until he let go.
“What was that for?”
“I haven’t seen you in such a long time. I missed you so much, Y/N. You have no idea.”
“Why didn’t you ever come see me then? Or call me?” You said stepping away from him.
“I couldn’t. She didn’t let me. She threatened to leave me if I didn’t change my number and move in with her. Not to mention, she threatened to leave me if I spoke to you. She even told me not to invite you, but I just had to. It’s not like she would cancel the wedding after the invites went out anyway.”
All you did was place your fingers on your forehead and shake your head in disbelief.
“What? Speak to me please. Tell me what’s wrong,” he begged. He walked up to you and grabbed your hand, but the feeling was too intimate for you, so you pulled away. “What did I do?”
You let him have it.
“What did you do? It’s more like what you didn’t do. Two years ago, you began drifting away from me and always making up excuses as to why we couldn’t hang out. Why? Because of Mina. You promised me you would call me about your good news, and I waited for a month before I realized you weren’t going to call. Why? Because of Mina. I tried calling you numerous times only to find out that you changed your number. Why? Once again because of Mina. You moved and didn’t tell me because of her. I cried myself to sleep, most nights, because of how much I love you. I began bawling my eyes out like a hormonal teenager in front of my mailbox when I received your wedding invite and didn’t stop crying until that evening. All because of Mina. Mina, the woman who made you change your number, made you move, made you have her brother as your best man, made you lose contact with your best friend because why exactly? Because she’s controlling. I don’t understand how you cannot see that if a person loved you, they wouldn’t put you through those things.”
Hot tears were burning down your face and you knew your makeup was ruined. But you didn’t care. You had to let it out. Rowoon just stood there gaping at you. You tried to clean the runny makeup on your cheeks, making your hands black from your eyeliner and mascara. The silence in the room didn’t bother you because you knew it would take Rowoon some time to process.
“You love me?” He asked. You weren’t sure if he was confused or if he was worried that you love him.
“All of that and the only thing you managed to process was that I loved you,” you laughed at him and grabbed a tissue from the dresser that was in the room. You turned your back to him and faced towards the mirror that was connected to the dresser and began wiping your face.
“Yes. I do. I have since high school. I even told you, but you took it the wrong way. I’m not expecting some pity party here. So please, spare me.”
You continued wiping your makeup, doing a pretty good job at making it look like you weren’t crying. When you were done and you turned around, Rowoon was gone, but you weren’t surprised.
The wedding began and you were seated at the worse table ever. You couldn’t see the bride walk down the aisle and you could barely see anything going on. You were, however, able to see Rowoon, which was enough for you.
“Dearly beloveds and honored guests, we are gathered here today to witness the giving and receiving of the marriage vows. Marriage is an institution ordained of God and is not to be entered into lightly or in jest and only after much consideration.”
The man began to speak, and you were already bored. You always thought that the best part about weddings was the end. The man continued talking, even reading some scriptures from the bible, and you almost fell asleep. The man continued to speak, but you knew it wasn’t straight from the bible because he was speaking in the English that you understood.
“Do you, Lee Mina, take this man, Kim Rowoon, to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and health, to love, honor and obey, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto him for as long as you both shall live? If so, answer ‘I DO.’”
She squealed and laughed as she said her I Do. You cringed as she continued to laugh and rolled your eyes when she mentioned out loud how excited she was.
The man began to speak to Rowoon. Not that you could physically see, but by the vows he was saying, you assumed he was. “Do you, Kim Rowoon, take this woman, Lee Mina, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in heath, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto her for as long as you both shall live? If so, answer 'I DO.’”
Rowoon quickly said I Do, but you didn’t see a smile on his face.
The man began to state, “If there be anyone present who may show just and lawful cause why this couple may not be legally wed, let him speak now or forever hold his peace.”
It was quiet for a few seconds before a voice boomed unexpectedly. It was none other than Jaewook’s.
“Rowoon, you know you can’t marry her,” Jaewook began. Jaewook was wobbling down the aisle and you knew he went straight to the bar when he left earlier. You quickly got up and ran to him, making a huge scene as you tried to pull him away, but he was too strong. “You’re marrying the wrong girl!” Jaewook continued to yell.
“Jae, be quiet. Let’s go,” you said hushing him and trying to pull him away from the wedding arbor. He pulled himself away from you and tried to steady himself.
“No! He has to marry you!”
The whole crowed gasped and turned towards you, and you didn’t move at all. You couldn’t believe Jaewook just said that in front of everyone.
“She loves you, Rowoon. How can you not see that she loves you and Mina doesn’t?” Jaewook slurred his words and began losing his balance and you ran to him and caught him on time before he fell unconscious to the ground.
“Get them out of here,” Mina demanded to Rowoon. You looked to Rowoon, and he had a sad expression on his face.
“I’m so sorry, Rowoon. I had no idea he was going to do this,” you told him. You were on the floor trying to pick Jaewook up, but he was just too heavy.
Mina walked up to you and pointed her scrawny skinny finger at you. “You! You’re the reason why I even started having problems in my relationship! Then you had to come here and ruin my wedding as well!?”
Almost instantly, she quickly drew her hand back and brought her hand against your cheek, burning your face as you quickly grabbed your cheek with your hand.
“Homewrecker!” She screamed and walked back to Rowoon and held his hands again. Rowoon continued to look at you and Jaewook with a doleful look and Mina dismissed you and Jaewook. “Ignore them. Please continue.”
But the man didn’t continue the vows. Rowoon dropped his hands from Mina and walked up to you and Jaewook. He brought his hand to your stinging cheek and softly caressed your face. You closed your eyes as his soft hand began to cease the pain and you felt like you were going to spontaneously combust when his lips crashed onto yours. You pulled back because you were surprised but Rowoon just pushed his kiss in deeper. That really made the crowd gasp and whisper.
His hand was still on your cheek as he slowly pulled away from your lips. “I love you, Y/N.”
“What?!” Mina yelled. “You love me! You cannot do this to me! This is my day!”
Rowoon looked back at her and laughed. “Not anymore it isn’t. I don’t love you anymore and I would never marry a rotten person like you.”
Rowoon turned his back on her and helped you and Jaewook off the floor. The three of you walked out, you and Rowoon both feeling relieved. You could still hear Mina screaming and crying, and when you looked back, she dramatically dropped herself to the floor, her face in her hands.
“And so, a week later you and dad got married?” Your daughter, June, asked. You nodded and continued to hug her as you both scrolled through the photo album of your wedding day. There was a picture of Rowoon smiling and laughing, which made you smile as well. You remembered how happy the both of you were and how happy Jaewook was to finally be Rowoon ‘s best man.
“What are my two favorite girls doing?” Rowoon asked as he walked in and plopped himself on the couch right next to you.
“Mom was telling me about the drama you two had when Mina was your girlfriend,” June said.
Rowoon just laughed. “Yeah, those were two crazy years. But I’m happy that your Uncle Jaewook objected during the wedding, otherwise I probably wouldn’t have noticed what a terrible person Mina was.”
“I heard my name,” Jaewook said walking into the living room with a beer. “I told your dad numerous times that she was one crazy chick.”
Rowoon rolled his eyes and smiled. He placed a kiss on your head and entwined his fingers with yours.
“I love you so much,” he said as you placed your head on his shoulder.
“I love you, Rowoon.”
106 notes · View notes
ddarker-dreams · 3 years
Note
A concept from a dream I had: Hisoka wants Chrollo's darling for himself and tries to steal her from him. Darling gets injured in the ensuing fight and has to get patched up afterwards by Machi. Then, a bit of fluff, darling seeks out Chrollo and hugs him for comfort because the whole thing has her a bit shaken. (Love your writing btw, it's super well written and captivating!)
Tunnel Vision. Yan Chrollo x Reader
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Warnings: Implied amnesia.  Word count: 2.2k. Note: thank you very much!! i made some minor changes, where darling is a member of the phantom troupe, and not yet aware of chrollo’s obsession. i hope you enjoy! i’ve had a lot of ideas for this specific darling with nen abilities and this idea seemed to fit her very well...
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Sharp, pointed nails digging into your skin. The sickeningly sweet fragrance of bubblegum blended with metallic blood. Black dots obscuring your vision, the world growing further away with each miserable second. Through labored breathing, a tense dialogue is exchanged between both parties, the ringing from your ears making it impossible to know for sure what they’re saying. Falling in and out of consciousness, you pick up on a few phrases. 
“Just admit it, you’re no worse than I am. Look what you did to the poor girl. ♥” 
“Maybe so, but that’s inconsequential. Your judgment means nothing.” 
...
“Ah… what… a shame, that I didn’t... get to play with her as much as you did--” 
“Hmm… to think your voice has never bothered me this much until now. This should silence you permanently.”
“--So you shouldn’t move around much until it fully heals,” Machi instructs, her voice clear and direct. At your lack of immediate response, she frowns, snapping her fingers to pull you from your trance-like state. “Oi, [First]. Are you even listening?” 
You blink, her voice cutting through your clouded mind like a knife. “My bad, I wasn’t paying attention.” 
Machi sighs and places a hand on her hip. Sapphire eyes glance over your person, not even bothering to hide her intentions, stopping every time she reaches your healed wounds. Even though your inebriated state, you can tell she’s deep in thought. You doubt she’d tell you what’s on her mind if you asked. So you sit there in silence, politely waiting for her to repeat what you missed. 
“I could tell. Just take it easy, you’re going to need a few days of rest.” Machi walks to her bag, rustling through its contents. She picks up a bottle of pills and places it on your nightstand. The same medicine that she had given you before treatment, to dull the pain. You fight back the urge to smile at the small gesture. Had you been any other customer of Machi’s, she would’ve left by now without a word, indifferent to your condition. Despite your best efforts, she catches onto your softened expression and clicks her tongue.
“Don’t look at me like that,” she deadpans, shooting you a glare. You give an apologetic smile. “Take one a day until it’s gone.”
“Thank you, Machi. I appreciate it.” 
“As you should,” Machi throws her bag over her shoulder and goes to the door. Before she can turn the nob, she turns back at you. “I forgot to mention, but you have a visitor. The boss has been waiting here since he brought you in.” 
An unknown emotion stirs in the depths of your soul. Any playful retaliation you had for Machi’s previous comment dies on your tongue, your eyebrows furrowing. Why do you feel troubled by this revelation? You fight back the anxiety that bubbles up in your stomach. There’s no time to linger on this newfound unease, as Chrollo enters the room after exchanging pleasantries with Machi. Despite your efforts to suppress your discomfort, your body does as it pleases, heart palpitating and throat feeling tight.
He shuts the door behind him quietly and leans against the wall.
Chrollo Lucilfer. You consider your relationship to be a strictly professional one -- maybe a touch of reverence on your behalf -- never feeling as friendly with him as with the other members. He stands before you now in casual attire. Jet black hair frames his face, loose and fine, proudly showcasing the unusual tattoo on his forehead. It’s strange to see him without his trademark leather coat. Instead, he wears jeans and a navy blue undershirt. Immediately, you pick up on the bloodstains on his shirt, assuming he had shed his coat before coming in.
He smiles at your staring, not commenting as you glance away. “How are you feeling?” 
“The medicine hasn’t worn off, so not too bad,” you struggle to exhale, your breathing ragged. Why does it feel so warm in here all of a sudden? “Machi told me you, uh, carried me here. Thank you. I’m sorry about your shirt… I’ll buy you a replacement.” 
Chrollo puts a hand up to stop you. “There’s no need.” 
Being one on one with your mysterious boss is as awkward as you imagined it would be. You still don’t know why he’s here. In between jobs, Chrollo would disappear into thin air, untraceable until calling the Troupe back together. So him being the one to find you on the verge of death hasn’t made sense. Machi gave noncommittal answers whenever you brought this up or told you to ask him yourself. Which you intended to at the time, but now that you’re in his intimidating presence, the words die on your tongue before they can begin. 
He pushes himself off the wall and sits on the edge of your bed. The proximity feels strangely intimate, your face flushing at how familiar the act seems to him. Chrollo’s close enough now where you can pick up on his rich cologne. Dry wood with hints of leather. The scent increases your heart rate, anxiety at a new peak. You bite your lip and ball your hands into a fist to try and cope with the all-encompassing unease. To appear weak in front of him would be an insult to your tattered pride. 
“Machi informed me about your memory,” Chrollo leans forward as if to inspect you. Grey eyes bore deep into your soul, searching for something. “She said you thought it was July when you regained consciousness.” 
You swallow thickly at his questioning. How humiliating is this? Whatever it was that had happened to injure you already felt degrading enough. your pride as a competent Nen user in shambles. The most plausible explanation is that Chrollo discovered you after you had lost a fight, but the remaining details are fuzzy at best. Theorizing is all you can do. The unexplained amnesia is frustrating, but it’s only a few months, so you figure it could’ve been worse. 
“That’s correct.”
Chrollo closes his eyes, as if in deep reflection. “So that’s how it is. I’m sorry to disturb you while you’re trying to recover, but can I ask a few questions?” 
“Ah, of course. I’m sorry if I’m forgetting something important…” 
This catches his attention, his posture tensing ever so slightly. You notice how his jaw tightens and assume your guess was correct. Your desire for answers on these missing four months strengthens and you feel hopeful that Chrollo holds some of the answers. It’s frustrating how both Machi and Chrollo seem to know more than you do but are refusing to give solid answers. Maybe they’re being considerate of your health? You’re not so fragile that you need to be coddled by your fellow Troupe members. 
Chrollo looks down at you through thick eyelashes. “Do you think that you are?” 
“I… I think so, yes.” 
He sits silently for a moment, running a hand through his hair and giving a bittersweet smile. “We’re in a relationship.” 
Wait, what? This would explain why Chrollo was with you at a time when the Troupe wasn’t gathered and his casual demeanor. Your expression must not be as schooled as you intended, as he gives a humorless chuckle to your wide eyes and parted lips.  You… were in a relationship with The Phantom Troupe’s boss? Your boss? When did that happen? How did that happen? Did the others know? Ah, the teasing that would come with that. It’s not that you don’t find him attractive, your eyes work just fine, but the revelation still takes you back. Cheeks burning, you break eye contact and play with your hair. Feeling overwhelmingly self-conscious, you pull your blanket up further to cover your bare shoulders. 
“There’s no need to be so embarrassed, [First],” Chrollo chastises with a playful tilt of his head. “I’ve seen all of it many times before.” 
He’s not making this easier on you. You’re desperate to move on from the subject and decide to bring up another troublesome topic. Though you have an idea of what the answer will be, you’d still prefer that he’d confirm it for peace of mind. 
“I was wondering, boss--” you cut yourself off with an apologetic smile when he furrows his eyebrows, “--I mean, Chrollo, about my Hatsu. I can tell I don’t have it now. Are you ‘borrowing’ it?” 
There’s no other plausible explanation. In what other scenarios would you lose a fight that horrendously? You can’t picture anything else, your abilities have been enough to earn you Chrollo’s recognition and subsequent invitation to the Troupe years ago. It’s not uncommon that your boss will ask to borrow other Troupe member’s abilities. Sometime during the months that you’ve forgotten, this must’ve happened, or so you assume. 
Chrollo nods his head. “I am, yes. Why do you ask? Would you like it back?” 
“It does feel like a part of me is missing,” you admit sheepishly, scratching your cheek. “So, if it isn’t too much trouble…” 
“I had to delay the job I borrowed it for due to what happened to you. Is it alright if I hold onto it for just a bit longer?” He’s moving even closer to you now than before. The bed shifts underneath his weight, Chrollo delicately taking your face into his hands. Your mind has trouble scrounging together a comprehensible response. How can you focus when the pads of his thumbs rub soothing circles against your cheek, his deep eyes hypnotizing. You swallow thickly when his pointer finger drags slowly against your bottom lip. Chrollo told you that you’re together, you remind yourself, assuming he has just missed touching you. It’s impossible to not notice the hungry gleam in his eyes.
“Oh, well, in that case, it’s fine.” You only manage to relax when he pulls away from you, content with your response. This has been a draining series of events. Chrollo’s one-sided familiarity isn’t easy to keep up with, you still view him as your boss and he views you as a lover. Sensing your apprehension, he takes your hand in his and places it over your pounding heart. 
“Do you feel this?” He hums, to which you nod, speechless at the bold action. “Even if you don’t remember your love for me, your body hasn’t forgotten a thing from our time together.” 
Is that what this feeling is? Love? You want to trust him, to take his word for it, but something still doesn’t feel right. Chrollo’s presence has kept you on edge ever since he entered your room. Even now, your skin is covered in goosebumps, hair standing on the back of your neck. What else are you forgetting? This is the question that reverberates in your mind, threatening to consume you entirely. Softly, as not to offend him, you take his hand off you. Chrollo’s expression is unreadable as you do so.
“I’m sorry, Chrollo, I’m just not sure I’m ready for... this yet.” You admit in truth, guilt washing over you at how his flirtatious demeanor changes to a calculating one. This is the version of Chrollo that you’re most familiar with. Your mysterious boss, who coldly issues orders and relishes in thrill of thievery, someone not as personal as he’s been acting like. Chrollo moves back and you’re grateful for the room to gather your bearings.
“Of course,” his aloof tone sends shivers down your spine, a distant gleam in his eyes. “I hope you don’t mind, but I have every intention of watching over you until you recover. It wouldn’t sit well with me otherwise.” 
Chrollo motions to your closet door, which is slightly ajar. Inside you recognize some of his clothes that are hanging next to yours. “And I do live here, but I’ll sleep on the couch for tonight. How does that sound?” 
So the two of you were so close that you had invited him to move in? How fast was this relationship going, anyway? It doesn’t feel like you to get that intimate with someone else in such a short time. The way Chrollo phrased it makes it sound like you used to sleep in the same bed too, how embarrassing… God, his comments are going to be the end of you. You need time to think. To let all this information that’s been thrust onto you sink in. 
“If it’s not too much for an inconvenience. I feel awful… about forgetting as much as I have. Machi said she didn’t see any notable head injuries, so I can only assume it was a Nen ability.” 
“That could be it,” Chrollo responds more flippantly than you expected, standing from your bed. You thought he’d be eager to explore the avenues of returning your memory. Maybe it’s too painful to think about? “You haven’t eaten since this morning, so I’ll get us some dinner. Keep resting up.” 
“Thank you. I’m sorry for all this trouble.” 
Chrollo waves away your apology without concern. He does, however, acknowledge you before leaving your shared bedroom. There’s a smile on his face that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. You hope you’re imagining it. 
“By the way, [First]... I want you to know this. I’ll have you fall in love with me again. That’s a promise.” 
Then he’s gone without another word.
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