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finerllines · 2 years

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love, rory [bestfriend!h]

a/n: hiya thank you all for being patient and i hope this part gets you excited for the next part!! there's not too much harry in this one but i think it's still pretty fun!! please reblog and comment if you enjoyed the fic and if you wanna be tagged in the next part lmk :D

summary: richard is in his comeback era while harry has triggered his downfall

wc: 9.2k+

cw: none, a little angsty

prev part

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This is bad. This is beyond bad, this is terrible. Everything is terrible.

Charlie hopes that her efforts to keep her panic eyes at bay are working, because they are in a crowded park with lots of families around. The last thing she wants is to attract any attention from ‘normal’ couples.

She has no idea how this happened. How she let this happen. It was just supposed to be lunch with Richard. Just one lunch for Richard to say whatever he had planned to say, and then they would go their separate ways and she’d finally block his number, forgetting that the meeting ever happened.

Instead, however, she finds herself seated across Richard, for the second time, with Rory between her legs, hands circling her waist protectively. She’s on guard, of course she is. Her daughter is the most important thing in her life. Her top priority, her only priority. She must put Rory’s needs before her own, and if that means giving her an opportunity to know her father then so be it.

The repeated reminders to herself that everything Richard says is bullshit were useless.

“I know I’ve abandoned you, and her, but I want to make it right. She won’t remember all of this, and she’ll never have to know, because I’ll make up for all the lost time. It’s okay if you never forgive me but don’t give her a reason to need to forgive me. She doesn’t deserve it. Please don’t make me hurt her the way I hurt you.”

She forgets that they were at one point in a committed relationship, that they used to know everything about each other. The only good thing about your partner walking out of your relationship is that it’s easy to get over them, you are too blinded by rage to miss them or reminisce. But he keeps saying all the right things. And while her brain tells her to stay on guard, her heart is more than ready to trust again, eager to return to that confident and self-assured person she was before he left. More importantly, that’s how she wants Rory to view her mother, an accomplished and confident woman. Not someone who was abandoned by the people who were supposed to love her unconditionally.

So, when he asks to meet Rory ‘as a family’, all she can do is whisper a wary “okay, sure”, as if every other thought had fled her brain.

Her agreement brings them to the park, on a picnic mat next to the playground.

The wariness has subsided a little. Richard seems to be sticking true to his promise and letting her direct how this interaction would go. She doesn’t want to hand Rory to him and send them off to the playground assuming that the little girl would be okay with a stranger taking her away. Sure, Rory was comfortable with Harry almost instantly, but something in Charlie’s gut tells her that this isn’t the same. Maybe it’s because everyone knows Harry is good with kids, he is basically England’s most sought after godfather, and Richard happened to run away at the first inkling of a baby. Either way, she reminds herself to push her own skepticism away and take cues from Rory, who so far hasn’t really seemed to notice the new man sitting across from her, her attention fully occupied by the toy car in her grip.

How do you introduce a baby to a stranger, Charlie asks herself. It’s not like introducing a new pet to your home – Rory is not interested in climbing over Richard and giving him a good sniff to sus him out. The best she can do is try and help him get Rory’s attention by prying the car out of her hand and passing it to him. Sure enough, the little girl’s eyes follow the toy with confusion, but despite Richard’s waving and Charlie’s encouragements, all she does is crawl over to him to reach for the car, completely uninterested in reciprocating the greeting.

“Rory, you don’t wanna say ‘hi’ to mummy’s friend?” She holds Rory’s hand and waves at him, “Say ‘hi’ Richard.”

Rory’s arm falls limply in front of her when it’s let go off. She simply looks at him with wide eyes, not saying or doing anything.

Richard clears his throat. “Hi Rory, can I play with you?”

Lying down on his stomach, he peers up at her and slowly reaches for another toy car and starts driving it in front of her. After some hesitation, Rory joins him in pushing and pulling her car around on the mat. And as much as Charlie hates to admit it, the smile that emerges on Richard’s face is a little infectious. Relief and excitement are written all over his face. Having your daughter ignore you can’t be a good feeling.

While he doesn’t manage to go from zero to a hundred (like Harry managed to), he did get a wave back and a giggle out of her, and when he placed his hand palm up on the mat hoping for a high five, Rory did wrap her hand around his thumb instead.

When the playground got more crowded later in the afternoon, Charlie insisted on taking their leave. Richard walked them to the car and pulled silly faces over her shoulder as she buckled Rory into the car seat.

“Thanks for letting me do this. I had a great time with her, and I think she likes me.” His voice is soft, and his eyes portray a shyness that is not normally there.

Charlie lets him take a step towards her when she turns to face him. This is the closest they’ve been since … well since he left.

“You’re welcome. It went well I think.”

His eyes brightened. “Does that mean I can see her again? Does that mean I can see you again?”

She bites her lip. “We’ll see, we can text about it, I guess. But do not come to my house uninvited ever.”

“I promise I won’t. That was stupid of me, I’m sorry.” He shakes his head aggressively. “You can trust me. I made a mistake but I’m back to make it right.”

Unsure of what to say, she just nods. “Alright. See you next time, possibly.”

On the drive home, she replays the little playdate over in her head. Everything went fine. Father and daughter seemed to get along fine. But is fine enough? She can’t help but compare Richard to Harry, something she subconsciously did ever since meeting Richard. It’s a little hard to compare first interactions, Rory was groggy and hungry the first time she met Harry. But every time after that, she was more than happy to play with him. In fact, she was in Harry’s arms every day after that.

Maybe she’s being too harsh, Harry had the advantage of being in her home and being around them every day. Plus, a lukewarm reaction is definitely better than a negative one. She has to give Richard a fair shot, he is Rory’s father, and it won’t be fair to deny her of that relationship just because of some personal bias towards Harry. Giving her daughter a chance to grow up with both parents is more important than her own feelings, she could never take that away from Rory.

Just thinking about Rory growing up to realise that her father didn’t love her enough to stick around from the beginning, and that her mother didn’t love her enough to put her first made Charlie feel sick. She can protect Rory from feeling unloved and unwanted.

She will.

Somehow Charlie’s life has taken a sharp left turn in a span of a month. Not only is Richard not blocked, he is also one of the few people she texts semi-regularly. She has no clue how it happened. All she remembers is getting a text from him thanking her again when she was lying in bed after their little family reunion and scheduling another playdate together the next week.

She figured it couldn’t hurt, a little trip to Costa won’t hurt anyone. She was right, she and her daughter came back from the coffee shop unscathed. But it did lead to her agreeing to another meeting with Richard, and another, and another, and another. Now, as she sits on a towel watching Rory and Richard build a sandcastle, she sifts through every conversation, look, and gesture that brought her to the beach with her ex-boyfriend and her daughter.

The beach seemed harmless enough, it’s a public place and definitely child friendly, however the fact that he would be in a state of undress completely flew over her head. She either managed to overlook that fact somehow, or just took it for granted that she is incapable of being attracted to a man who made her feel small and insecure.

When he whipped off his shirt seconds after putting his stuff down, Charlie stood frozen, eyes glued to his chest for a good couple of seconds. He must have felt her eyes on him because when she fails to look away quick enough, he shoots her a boyish smirk, which sends a rush of heat up her neck and face, finally forcing her to snap out of it and look away.

Red flags immediately start waving in her head. This is dangerous territory, retreat. As much as she’d like to be rational and heed the warning, her heart is stubborn and won’t move on from how handsome he is. She hates to admit it but the time apart did his body good.

He was always a looker, that’s what drew her to him in the first place, but he somehow got more attractive. His body filled out a bit more, and the sun is doing him lots of favours by hitting his skin just right, making his eyes and smile brighter.

Annoyingly, Charlie finds herself sneaking glances at Richard throughout the day – when he holds Rory’s hand to slowly walk her down to the water, when he looks back at her for reassurance after making Rory laugh, and when he hands her an ice cream with a soft smile.

They sit around a cooler bag for lunch, picking at the sandwiches and fruit that Richard packed. He does up a little plate of foods she previously approved for Rory and guides her hands to encourage her to start eating. Charlie notes his movements are less timid. He still handles her watchfully, trying to gauge Rory’s reaction to being touched by him, except his movements no longer stutter.

Rory’s been exceptionally well behaved the whole morning, happily rolling around in the sand and kicking her feet up with excited shrieks when her feet get lowered into the sea. It’s been an action packed morning and she’s completely justified in whining and kicking up a big fuss, refusing to eat her food.

A long, high pitched whine escapes her lips as she pushes Richard’s hand away. Her lips form a deep pout, eyes widening to look at her mum as if pleading for something.

“What’s wrong? She hurt?”

Charlie smirks at Richard’s unease. “Nothing’s wrong, she’s just a baby, and this is what babies do. They whine and cry when they’re tired or hungry while also refusing to sleep or eat.”

His expression doesn’t relax.

She returns her daughter’s pout and opens her arms. Rory instantly takes the invitation and crawls over for a cuddle. “You’ll have to get used to it. Being a parent is more than giggles at the beach.”

“I’ll … have to keep that in mind then.”

The pair sit in silence as Rory drifts to sleep in Charlie’s rocking arms after stubbornly eating a couple of blueberries and a piece of bread.

Eventually, Richard gets bold enough to slide closer to them. He strokes Rory’s back once slowly. “She’s adorable.”

“I guess we did good.”

He chuckles lightly. “Yeah. Crazy to think that she’s half of me. Half of us.”

His words are weighty. They both know it.

When she doesn’t respond, he continues. “Is she like me?”

“A little. She’s quite outgoing, likes attention, likes to perform.”

“What are you trying to say then?” he asks playfully. It’s been a while since he joked around with her.

“You know I’m right. You’ve always loved telling your stories and getting a laugh from everyone and I liked watching from the side.”

“Hey,” he says, tucking a finger under Charlie’s chin to make their eyes meet, “I like hearing you talk about us, about what we used to be. We were good.”

She doesn’t know what reply would be appropriate, so she chooses to keep quiet. It has been a while since she’s properly looked into Richard’s eyes.

Maybe Richard isn’t as magnetic as Harry and doesn’t cause emotion to build and build in her chest, only to gently deflate the build back up again, but he’s familiar and comforting all the same. As much as she hates to admit it, it feels nice to see Richard shoot her flirty smirks and order her favourite ice cream without having to ask, it feels nice to have someone want to rebuild a relationship with her, even if it’s not a romantic one.

She decides to let herself lean in. They are just two adults trying to co-parent for the sake of their daughter, nothing more. So what if he makes her blush? Their daughter had to come from somewhere. This is good. Rory gets a chance to be raised by both parents, and maybe once she shirks off the abandoned single mother reputation her parents will see Rory as the blessing she is. Rory will get to have a full family, parents, grandparents, the works.

The only issue with committing to co-parenting with Richard is that she definitely can’t put off telling Harry about it now. No more secrets, she owes him that much.

Turns out the universe hates Charlie because again, the opportunity to deliver news to Harry is taken away from her.

“What’s this?” Harry asks as he holds his phone in front of his laptop camera. A grainy photo fills the screen.

“Good morning to you too.”

“Charlie.” His voice is short.

She squints trying to figure out what she is supposed to be looking at. Then, her jaw drops.

“Is that, is that …”

“You and Rory with Richard? Yeah.”

“Wh-what? H-how?” she stutters with bewilderment, “Who took that photo?”

“Some fan, I don’t know.”

“Why would they take a photo, you weren’t with us?”

Harry’s silent for the first time this conversation, seeming to have run out of answers. “H, why did they take a photo?” His hand holding up the photo starts to tremble ever so slightly. “H, what aren’t you telling me?”

“What aren’t you telling me?” he counters.

“Harry.” Her voice is stern now. “Look at me.”

With a huff, he lowers his hand to reveal his tense jaw and furrowed brows. Charlie doesn’t say anything. She’s run of words.

His hand drags down his face slowly. “Because people saw us at the park the last time, so they think monkey’s mine and you’re cheating on me.”

It’s Charlie’s turn to clench her jaw and furrow her brows. “What.”

“That day in the park, someone took a photo of us and we were holding hands and stuff so they think we’re together. You can’t make out Rory’s face they just, they recognise you, so they just assumed.”

“They?”

He clears his throat.

“The fans. The internet.”

The ground disappears beneath her feet. Every hair on her body stands up, her skin feeling cold and prickly. She hears Harry saying her name faintly, but she can’t make out his voice clearly over the ringing in her ears.

“When was this?” Charlie’s whispering now.

“I don’t under-“

“When did the park photos first get posted.”

“Um,” if she could get her eyes to focus through the tears, she would see the dread on his face, “the day after. The day I left.”

Harry could practically hear the wheels grinding in her head.

“You knew,” she finally says. “You told me to stay offline because of promo. That was right after you left.”

“Love, I –“

“You lied to me. How long did you think you could keep this up before I found out?”

Her tone is so flat that he isn’t sure whether she’s asking him a question or making a statement.

“I was trying to get the photos taken down, I didn’t want you to get scared for no reason.”

Charlie snaps out of her reverie.

“No reason?” Her gaze is piercing, ice cold. “You know damn well I have a good reason to be scared. I think you’re just fucking selfish.”

“Selfish?”

He has the nerve to look offended, she thinks.

“You don’t want me to keep Rory away from you, don’t want me to realise that Rory being seen with you is dangerous. I said over and over that we have to be careful, we can’t just make last minute trips to the park in the middle of the day, but you insisted. Turns out,” she’s close to shouting now, “we were fortunate enough to not be followed home, to not have you walking into my home holding my baby plastered all over the internet, for everyone to see and speculate.”

“That’s not true and you know it.”

“Do I?” she laughs humourlessly, “Because I think, no, I know that if you didn’t see the photos with Richard, you would never have told me that millions of people have photos of my daughter.”

“I’m sorry that I didn’t want to worry my best friend. And everyone would’ve forgotten about Rory if you weren’t seen parading around with Richard. Who the hell brings their baby on dates, with the man that walked out on them no less? You’ll just let anyone hold Rory then, huh? Have some self-respect, if not for yourself then for Rory.”

“Richard is Rory’s father, he has more of a right to hold Rory than you.” Harry’s jaw snaps shut. “And who I let be around my daughter is frankly none of your business. What, you spend two weeks with her and suddenly know what’s best for her? I am her mother. You do not have the right to tell me how to parent her. And it wasn’t a date, not that it matters. Heaven forbid that Richard had a change of heart and decided that Rory is someone worthy of love. At least he cares enough about Rory to suck up his pride and apologise, unlike you who doesn’t give a shit about her safety.”

He chooses to ignore the words directed at him, feeling too fired up to think rationally. He goes for the low hanging fruit instead. “C’mon, you can’t be stupid enough to think that Richard really changed that much in just one year. He obviously has some sort of motive and you’re dumb enough to fall for whatever bullshit he’s feeding you.”

A bitter taste fills his mouth the moment the words leave his lips. He opens his mouth to take it back, but he doesn’t get the chance.

“Fuck you.” All the bite in her voice is gone, reduced to something breathy and shaky.

She disconnects the call not trusting herself to keep it together any longer. Frankly, she’s surprised she’s still sitting up right because all she wants to do is curl up into a ball and will the ground to swallow her whole.

How the hell is she going to do literally anything else for the rest of the day.

Taking advantage of the lump in her throat, she calls work to take a sick day and cancels the sitter. Her head feels like it’s filled with static with her consciousness bouncing from one crisis to another.

But when she sees Rory smiling to herself as she plays in the playpen with the blissful obliviousness only a child can have, it seems like everything stands still. That smile is something special. Nothing else matters. Not her own feelings and definitely not Harry’s feelings.

“My sweet girl,” she coos, reaching to pick Rory up. Her cheeks are rosy and her little baby teeth are on display as she stares at her mother with an open mouthed grin.

The tension in Charlie’s body slowly dissipates as she rocks side to side, her daughter cuddled close to her chest. As if sensing her distress, Rory doesn’t wiggle or kick her legs, simply pressing her cheek firmly against her mother’s chest and reaching her little hand up to rest on Charlie’s neck, as if she’s trying to soothe. Charlie tries her best to repress the memory of what just happened, mindful to not squeeze her daughter too hard.

It’s only when Rory mumbles “mamama” that she breaks and starts to cry.

“Harry!”

“Huh? Sorry, I’m listening.”

Harry was in fact not listening, in fact he hasn’t been listening for the past couple of hours, or days really. It’s hard to be excited for a new era, new album, and new tour, when all he wants is to go home and grovel at Charlie’s feet until she forgives him. He can’t believe he was stupid enough to say all that shit to her. If he heard anyone disrespect her and her daughter like that, he would deck them immediately, cameras be damned. But he can’t punch himself silly, so he settles with mentally berating himself. It’s hard to absorb what everyone else is saying when every word he said to Charlie is constantly replaying in his head, only pausing when he does his daily internet browse to make sure no new photos of Charlie and Rory have surfaced.

Normally, he would tell himself to get lost in his work. It’s a little hard to do that this time when so much of the album is about the person he hurt, and it doesn’t help that there are a couple late additions that hit especially hard right now.

He reads through the prepared list of pointers on what to say to skilfully answer questions about the photos with Charlie and Rory yet say absolutely nothing. He sighs. He never wants to have to talk about them in public ever, especially not to Howard Stern.

“So, Harry, I want to talk about a couple of very interesting photos that have emerged over the past couple of weeks. This is, as your fans have deduced, your long time friend and who we presume to be her baby. This picture of the two of you holding hands looks particularly romantic.”

He schools his expression, trying to maintain his unbothered façade. “Sure,” he says simply, hoping that it comes across nonchalant rather than through gritted teeth.

The studio breaks out in polite giggles assuming that his reply is part of some bit he is doing. “Is that all you’re gonna give us I mean, the fans want to know.”

“Really? Well, like you said my fans know that the woman in the photos has been in my life since I was a kid, and they know that I care about the people in my life a lot.”

“Oh, so you’re confirming that the woman in the photos is your childhood best friend, Charlie? That’s good to know. For someone who’s been around you for so long we know very little about her.”

He hates that Stern knows her name. “Umm, well there isn’t much to know. She’s just a regular person, regular job, regular life. So, not much to talk about.” His non-statement is punctuated with a challenging eyebrow quirk as if daring Howard to say anything else about Charlie.

“Okay, I guess that is all Harry Styles wants to give us today everyone.”

Harry has never been so glad to talk about Sarah and Mitch. He’ll have to thank them for taking the heat off him later.

When he’s finally done with a long day of clenching his jaw and biting his tongue, he’s stopped in the carpark by his assistant. “Your apartment security needs you to pick up a package when you get back. They say it has to be by today.”

He assumed that it’s just a wardrobe item from Lambert that needs to be approved, so he’s fully confused by the bouquet of flowers awaiting him. He pulls out the little card.

Dear H,

Congrats on the new album! I know everyone will love it and love you just like we do. I’m proud of the star you’ve become, and Rory and I can’t wait for you to come home, she wants to celebrate with her Uncle Harry. xx

Love, Charlie and Rory

The fact that he made it into the lift before starting to cry is a feat. This wasn’t a breathy, body-wracking kind of cry. He doesn’t even realise he is crying until tears start falling onto the card that he can’t seem to peel his eyes from.

Friends fight all the time, but Harry and Charlie aren’t regular friends. She must have arranged for the delivery before the dreaded call because he isn’t convinced that she’s misses him right now. Why would she.

His heart plumets back to the bottom of his stomach. What is supposed to be a career milestone is now marred by his jealously and possessiveness over someone he has no right feeling that way towards.

He wants to celebrate with them, more than anything. He wants to dance around the living room with Rory in his arms while Charlie drinks in the album with his mum and sister on the sofa. Like a family.

With a restless heart, he squeezes his eyes shut and goes through the rollerdex of memories of the three of them to soothe himself to sleep.

Charlie feels like a terrible friend when she needs to be reminded that her best friend’s third album is dropping via an email invoice from a florist, a florist that she doesn’t even remember engaging.

She was excited for the release. The sitter has been booked for the night of the One Night Only show, where she intended to debut the Gucci flares Harry bought her to match with him a little, ever since the date got confirmed. Now, she supposes, it’d be stupid of her to assume that he even wants her there, tainting a celebratory night with memories of their falling out.

Was it just a falling out though? There was a finality about it that left a funny feeling in her chest. But there is no way she’s going to be the one to reach out and apologise first. Sure, she said some hurtful things, but so did he. After having forgiven Richard, a task she previously thought would be impossible, she’s frankly over being forgiving.

If she sits unoccupied in silence for too long, the fear that Fine Line may now be the last album release she gets to be a part of would creep in. If she had somehow foreseen this falling out, she would have made more of an effort to celebrate with him that year.

It doesn’t help that on the day of release, Charlie receives a package from LA addressed to her with no return address – not that it’s needed, there’s only one person who would send her stuff from LA. She’s hesitant to open it. Maybe he’s shipped her old books and things back, like an actual break up. That would hurt.

The offending package stays sealed on the coffee table all day, floating in the back of her mind as she moves through a long day of corporate work and mum work. When Rory waddles over and drags it onto the carpet with a thud, she knows that the package can’t be a coffee table fixture any longer.

“You want to see what Uncle Harry sent huh, lovie.”

Rory, wide-eyed and rosy cheeked, leans onto her shoulder for support as she mumbles, “Yummy.” That’s her new word of the week.

Sitting the package in her lap, she slices it open with shaky hands, pre-emptively wincing.

The first thing that greets her is a folded piece of lined paper, clearly ripped out of a notebook. Setting that under her thigh – she’ll tackle that later when she is at liberty to sob into her blanket – item after item gets pulled out of the deceptively small box. Unfolding the pieces of clothing reveals a hoodie with ‘Harry’s House’ printed on the right corner and a shirt with an upside down flowerpot plastered on the front. Accompanying them is a Rory-sized sweat set with the same branding, packed with a note saying, ‘Maybe seeing my name written on her pants will help her learn my name xx’.

A wave of emotion washes over her, breath hitching. She’s confused. He writes as if nothing had happened between them, as if certain he’ll be back to cuddle Rory the moment her bottom lip turns downward.

Leaning to the side to release the note, she unfolds it, which takes an embarrassing amount of tries because she is full on shaking now. Her chest is tight. Her lungs don’t fill fully with air.

Dear Charlie,

I promise to apologise for what I said but I want to do that in person. I understand if you don’t want to see or hear from me, so while I’ll miss you at the shows (you also have Manchester tickets if you change your mind), it won’t feel right if you’re not part of this release. It probably makes me even more of a prick to send you stuff with my face and name all over it but it’s a good thing that being a prick comes naturally to me.

I want you to have something from this release because a piece (a big piece) of the album is yours, just like all the previous albums. You’re my muse always, and now monkey is too. So many of these songs are for you. I’m not going to embarrass you, and me, by telling you which songs were inspired by you and the life we’ve shared. If you can bring yourself to, I want you to listen to the album knowing that there’s no Harry without Charlie, and there are a few songs that I wrote after spending those weeks with the both of you. They were too good to be true and I needed to immortalise those feelings somehow.

I’ll earn your trust again, swear on my life. I want to be in monkey’s life forever, even if it means sharing her with someone else. You can scream and hit me, send me a Christmas list every year, or make me play nice with Richard every day. I’ll do anything. Call if you or monkey need me, and I’ll be right there.

Please let me see the both of you again. I love you. Both of you.

Love,

H xxx

Charlie blinks furiously to try and hold the tears back, eyes stinging from how hard she’s been staring at the letter, reading his words over and over, only forcing herself to look away when her vision gets too blurry.

There’s a good couple of hours before midnight when the album comes out. Hopefully the nightly chores are enough to occupy her mind. She doesn’t know if she’ll make it to midnight if she has to sit in her thoughts for more than a minute.

You’re my muse always. There’s no Harry without Charlie.

That’s all she hears in the back of her head in between each song as she makes her way down the track list, back resting against her headboard. Her mind inadvertently scans each title and lyric for something, anything; anything to help her make sense of what Harry meant.

As It Was lulls her into a false sense of security. That must be the one about her, a song about childhood and change – she ticks all the boxes. A subconscious sigh of relief escapes her lips when the next track starts.

Honestly, Charlie’s not sure what she’s so scared of, this isn’t the first time he’s revealed that she’s inspired songs. He did tell her flat out that he started writing Falling after he woke up from their phone call during an extremely drunk and emotional night. Yet, none of that quite compares to the intimacy of being deemed someone’s muse, a prominent enough source of inspiration for this album to somehow belong to her despite having said or heard nothing. Like she lives in his thoughts, through the flings and the sold out shows, still lingering.

The next two songs are easier pills to swallow. She doesn’t love being reminded that Harry loves love and has good sex, but the years have taught her how to switch off the possessive part of her brain and just enjoy the good music. Needless to say, she’s a little blindsided by the chorus of Matilda.

It’s definitely not subtle. Vague, yes. But not subtle. Doesn’t help that he sent Rory a Matilda picture book like month ago.

It’s like a slap in the face.

She wants to dig up her anger towards Harry and feel offended and hurt, be mad at him for harbouring these feelings about her life as if she didn’t deserve to know. But she knows she can’t, the emotional turmoil and confusion wasn’t enough to turn off the rational part of her brain.

She remembers what he told her: you’re doing such a good job raising her, she’s such a happy baby.

She is starting her own family, with her, Rory, and maybe Richard. Richard probably doesn’t love Rory yet, but he must be on his way. So, Harry’s right, she is starting a family that will be full of love.

This new rush of motivation builds within her until the croon of Boyfriends registers and knocks all it down. She’s sitting up now, eyes narrowed and face scrunched as if the song is a nuanced piece of poetry filled with metaphors and symbolism, instead of a pop song that blatantly slags off shitty boyfriends and relationships.

It just seems a little too on the nose. He did call her stupid, and if she hadn’t hung up on him, he might have called her a fool as well.

Squeezing her eyes shut and pinching the bridge of her nose, she wills the creeping feeling that this song is about her and Richard away. He only found out about Richard a couple weeks ago, she reassures herself, there’s no way he wrote, recorded, and produced this song in time.

Unfortunately, one of the other possible explanations might be even worse – he wrote this before Richard was back in the picture, meaning, again, that he has felt this way for more than a month and he just failed to tell her, for whatever reason.

If Harry really thinks that she’s an idiot for letting Richard back in and wanting to be part of a loving family, then she’s crushed. Especially because that would make Rory a clumsy mistake. Collateral damage. A product of her stupidity.

A shiver shoots up her body as she jolts out of her reverie, finger hastily pausing the album.

No, there’s no way. How could she even think that? This is Harry, her Harry. All he’s done is love her, and the tenderness in his eyes whenever he looked at Rory simply cannot be faked. Also, he would never air his disapproval to millions before speaking to her about it. Despite how shitty his words were, he’s not that scummy.

Tilting her head back to rest against the headboard, she shakily gasps through her mouth as if crying silently. Soon, her breaths quicken, chest rising and falling dramatically. She’s sobbing, but there are no tears. A pathetic sight, truly.

She hates herself. Truly. Turns out being abandoned doesn’t make you more independent. Just desperate for love and approval.

She feels alone and admonished, like she should have known better than to have her hopes pinned on two men. And when she feels like this, the only thing her heart craves is Harry. Her Harry. The Harry who begged her parents to let her come along with Anne to his X Factor audition because having her backstage would make him sing better.

Before she can second guess herself, she reaching for her phone and sends a quick message, not even thinking before pressing send.

It’s good.

With a sigh of resignation, she locks her phone and slides under the covers, ready for the day to end. She turns away from the side table before the screen awakes with a notification.

I’m glad. xx

“You wanna dance, Rory?”

Charlie’s making her morning coffee with a smiley baby standing by her on a little babyproof stool.

“Yay!” Rory wears a bright open-mouthed grin, showing off her growing teeth. She’s swaying back and forth, smacking her hands on the countertop.

She’s such a happy baby.

“Hey Google, play Late Night Talking by Harry Styles on Spotify.”

Gripping the safety bar in front of her, Rory starts giggling and bouncing along.

Another weekend, another play date with Richard. They’re going to farmers market to let Rory do some arts and crafts with the other local children. It’ll be their first time being co-parents in front of others. Charlie spent all night trying to decide how much of a couple they should be. Most of the other parents would know that they had separated, and because of that stupid photograph, everyone knows that they have reunited in some capacity.

She’s not looking forward to the watchful eyes.

Just when she thinks enough time has passed for the town to no longer find her little scandal exciting, fucking Richard comes back into the picture to invite another season of viewers.

“I’m going to get her cleaned up and changed. Make yourself comfortable, or … reacquainted I guess.”

It’s the first time Richard has made it through the doorway since leaving. He didn’t officially move in when they were together because he insisted on keeping his house as a ‘creative getaway’. In hindsight, that should have been a glaring red flag, especially since ‘creative’ is not how anyone would describe Richard. But it all worked out, in a way. Now that she trusts him to carry her daughter, she figures that he can be trusted to wait in the living room.

When Charlie returns to the living room, Richard is studying the coffee table book about photography she bought as home décor after he left, appearing to be midway through a lap around the living room.

Charlie checked every romance cliché after being abandoned. Cut and dyed her hair, blocked Richard and any mutual friends (or more accurately, his friends that later became ‘their’ friends), and did a deep clean of their previously shared house before redecorating everything – she tried looking at the bright side by constantly telling herself that being alone meant that she could finally decorate how she wanted, without having to accommodate his ‘boy junk’.

The easy to clean, minimalist aesthetic was swapped for a more eclectic one, one that felt her own and cosy. A mustard yellow footstool to accompany a burnt orange rug in the living room, a pair of cow mugs as ornaments on the shelf, and a High School Musical poster she found in at the bottom of her drawer. It’s not like she has one night stands to impress, so why not do her morning skincare next to a Troy Bolton poster blu-tacked next to the dresser. In hindsight, the minimalist living room would be easier to babyproof, but growing up surrounded by colour can’t be a bad thing for a baby.

As much as she hates to admit it, the romcom heroines were right.

Changing these things did feel like she was ridding herself of the past, ridding herself of the Charlie that people were okay leaving behind, the Charlie that was pitiful. It marked the start of a new life for herself.

Seeing a piece of her ‘old life’ in her new living room does feel strange. She can tell he feels strange too. Out of place. From the kitchen, she watches Richard move about as if he’s in a museum, inspecting and observing, occasionally picking things up to get a closer look, hands returning to their place behind his back every time. She tries to get a read on his expression. The coffee table book gets no reaction, his mouth staying in a straight, tight line. Her CD collection, however, gets a brow quirk and a scoff, the latter in response to the Harry’s House CD that accompanied the clothing.

Guess their little man rivalry is still not over.

He doesn’t comment about what she’s done to her house. In fact, he doesn’t say much to her the whole morning. He played nice in front of the other parents at the market, cracking jokes and skilfully skirting around questions about their relationship. He also did well with his daughter, who seemed to finally start to recognise him, helping her reach for markers and stickers, and giving her little high fives. His odd lukewarm energy was only directed at Rory when the radio playing throughout the market started playing a familiar song.

It took a couple seconds for the little girl to register and recognise the synth, but when she did, she turned to look at her mother, as if for confirmation that she is hearing one of the Uncle Harry’s songs. Rory shared a smile with Charlie and used the crafts table to stabilise herself as she bounces along to the music.

“Yeah Rory, it’s Uncle Harry. You like this song, don’t you? My clever girl.” Charlie pushed Rory’s hair away from her eyes. In her periphery, she saw Richard’s face drop into something unpleasant.

It was like his mask slipped for a split second, the change in expression so sudden and abrupt. By the time Rory turned to face him, hoping to dance with him, his features evened back out.

Despite how closely they were being watched, Charlie doesn’t think, or at least she hoped, that anyone else sensed that change in Richard. If not, the rumour mill would not stop turning, spinning some sort of story about a rivalry about these two men competing over her daughter.

Charlie decides to say something once they get back and has Rory’s lunch settled.

“Is something going on? You’ve been kind of quiet today, and at the market you became a little strange.”

“Oh?” He raises his eyebrows. There is something in his tone that makes Charlie feel like she’s being challenged. “Yeah, you think?”

She fights hard not to roll her eyes. She doesn’t want this to escalate. “We were together for two years. I think I can tell when you’re a little off.”

“Okay, tell me then.”

“You have just been more quiet than usual and when Rory wanted to dance with you, you didn’t try to engage with her like I expected. On any other day I’d think you would have jumped at the opportunity to -”

“- jumped at the opportunity to what? Gain your approval? Win you over? Seems a bit too late for that.”

She’s confused by his sudden animosity. “No, not mine. Rory’s.”

“Hah. Seems like its too late for that too.”

“Okay, what’s going on?”

He leans against the kitchen counter and folds his arms. “Nothing, nothing.” He takes a sip of water. “I’ve just realised that Harry fucking Styles is always going to be one step ahead of me and I don’t know why I try.”

“Harry?” she asks. After a beat of silence, she asks again. “What does Harry have to do with anything?”

“You tell me because for some reason, even when it comes to my daughter, he wins. I thought that a couple weeks head start can’t be that much, I’m her father. Yet for some reason, he’s managed to win her over before I could get a fair shot.” He rolls his eyes then mumbles, “She must get that from you.”

Charlie takes a beat to stew over his words. There’s something about what he said that makes her stomach turn. At first, she thinks it’s his tone, that mix of condescension and arrogance, as if he was robbed of something, as if she robbed him of something.

“Richard, if something is bothering you just tell me what it is and stop speaking in code. Whatever weird competition you think you have with –“

She freezes midsentence, unblinking.

“What?” he asks.

Her head snaps to face the man in her kitchen. Rory, who appears to be oblivious to the tension in the air, continues to fist smushed blueberries into her mouth.

“How did you know Harry met Rory before you?”

He thinks for a second, then says, “Because you have his album lying around and photos with him on the fridge. And c’mon, one of his new songs play and Rory is somehow able to recognise it.”

“No, you specifically said that he met her a couple weeks before you.” A beat of silence passes. Then, the lump in her throat grows so large that she has to physically swallow before she can speak again. “I think,” she pauses to steady her voice, “I think you lied to me. You lied to me about not knowing that I kept the baby.”

“Woah, lied is a bit of a strong word Charles,” he says, still trying to keep his tone casual.

Charlie’s having none of it. She’s over being lied to and made to look the fool.

She goes straight in, sounding nothing short of accusatory. “Why did you come back, Richard? Because of some sick game you think you have with Harry, some sick game that you’ve decided to drag me and my daughter into?”

“Oh, so now she’s back to being your daughter is she?”

“Please, you don’t have to act like you care about her anymore. Tell me the truth. Now.”

“Fine,” he throws his hands up like he’s being accosted, “do you know how humiliating it is to find out about your daughter from everyone else? How much it sucks to be sent link after link of Daily Mail articles because your daughter has apparently been photographed with Harry Styles? For fuck’s sake.”

“Do you know how humiliating it is to have basically the whole town know that your long term partner doesn’t love you enough to stay and raise a child with you? You didn’t even stay long enough to talk about it, ask whether I wanted to keep or abort it. The minute you heard I was pregnant you took off spouting some bullshit excuse.”

“Look, I’m sorry, okay. Is that what you want to hear? But I spent years being compared to Harry. Your friends, family, neighbours, everyone. All they talked about was how sweet Harry is, how successful Harry is. He may have managed to charm everyone else in this town, but he has not fooled me. I see him for the cocky douche he is. I tried to be nice to him because he’s your best friend or whatever, but I’m tired of being the bigger person and ignoring his stupid smirks and snide comments. And because you decided to go parading around with him and Rory, all I’ll ever hear is how good he looks with her. I can’t let that fucker haunt me even after I’ve washed my hands off of you.”

“Well, I hate to break it to you,” she goes to pick Rory out of the highchair and hugs her protectively to her chest, “but doesn’t just look good with her, he is good with her. And whatever perceived rivalry you have with Harry doesn’t justify anything. I’m sorry your male ego is hurt but all of that is in your head, and if you thought that you could be a good father by being fuelled by your pride, then you’re more of an idiot than I thought.

“You lied to me, and you lied to my daughter. What was your plan? To play the role of a doting father until you got Rory more attached to you than to Harry, then disappear from her life again once you felt satisfied? Get a grip Richard, you’re almost 30. No one is playing these stupid games but you.

“I know those years meant nothing to you, but it meant something to me, and I’d appreciate it if you’d think about someone else for once and never come near me or my daughter ever again.”

Richard scoffs, face straining so hard that he’s almost vibrating. “Fine. Don’t come crawling back to me for help when Mr. Popstar gets too busy for the both of you. If you want to be delusional and think that he’s going to stick around this little town for you, you are more than welcome.”

His gaze on them as he leaves is so piercing that she instinctively cups the back of Rory’s head to shield her.

When the door slams shut, her daughter flinches in her arms a little. The silence is deafening, ringing in her ears as the weight of what just happened slowly sinks in.

Mindlessly, her body moves to wash the dried food on Rory’s face and seats her in the middle of the play area. Charlie’s body all but crumples onto the sofa, eyes staring straight ahead. Feeling tears start to well, she tips her head back to look up at the ceiling, willing them back into her eyes. She refuses to cry over that piece of shit ever again.

At least she managed to keep herself from screaming. The last thing she wants is to scare her daughter.

She’s such a happy baby.

She feels like she’s underwater. Everything around her is blurry, head filled with muffled voices. Her head feels like it’s rocking, being pushed and pulled by the rolling of waves as she slowly floats to the surface. Like the sharpness of taking a deep gasp of air, there is a pinch in her chest that forces her to come to her senses and digest the intensity of the last fifteen minutes.

Apparently, she is incapable of keeping people from walking out of her life. Even with her best efforts and best intentions, she managed to push away two people from Rory’s life - one person twice - all before she turns two. That has to be some kind of record.

It’s funny, she feels raw and wounded. Richard came and plugged this hole in her heart, the hole that he happened to leave behind. And yet now, she is in no hurry to mend that hole, to rebuild those walls and go back to not needing anyone else. Making amends is admitting defeat, admitting that Richard had the power to hurt her; trying to undo the damage means acknowledging that there is damage, and wearing her weakness on her sleeve.

She’s tired.

So what if people know that she’s unwanted goods? You can’t break what’s already broken. If people want to come in and out of her life, so be it. The only person she needs to protect is Rory. People can use her until they lose interest for all she cares. They just can’t use Rory. She’s more than happy to be an emotional punching bag if it means that she keeps her daughter sheltered from it all.

Harry was right. She is stupid. Stupid to think that Richard had a change of heart and stupid to be so ready to let people into Rory’s life. Good thing Richard left as soon as he came. Rory didn’t get a chance to get attached to him, unlike with Harry.

Harry. She needs to apologise to Harry.

Charlie is a coward. A coward and a pushover.

All the pink cowboy hats and feather boas in the train carriage are mocking her. She keeps her head tipped downwards, staring down at her phone, hoping that none of the fans recognise her.

She knew this was a bad idea. But when Anne calls telling you how excited she is to finally be going to a concert with you again, how do you say no. She can’t exactly tell Anne that her son called her stupid and a crap mother, so she’s still too hurt to see him, but turns out he was right so she is also embarrassed.

The train to London was nerve wrecking. All she could think about was what to say to him when they finally met, if she should apologise first, and if they should talk then and there. Some higher power must have been working in her favour because the train got delayed just enough to allow her to make it for the concert while skipping the pre-show socialising in the friends and family area where Harry was sure to have made an appearance.

Leaning against the train window, the roughness of the tracks causes her head to jostle around. It’s a welcomed disturbance. It keeps her anchored to reality, stopping her from getting too lost in the mental image of Harry’s face when he spotted her in the crowd. If she had blinked, she would have missed it. Just the quickest flash of realisation, brows falling for a split second, almost impossible to read from so far away. She has no idea if it was relief or disappointment. It didn’t help that he proceeded to avoid eye contact with her for the rest of the concert.

So, she fled. Using Rory as an excuse, as per usual. She told Anne and Gemma she had to catch the next train home and couldn’t stick around to wait to see Harry. After smiling apologetically when Anne half-heartedly scolded her for not bringing Rory with her, she wedged her purse securely under her arm and legged it, making her way to the station amidst the swarm of fans who were still screaming and crying from the experience.

It is only when she locks the front door behind the babysitter that she lets her guard down, shoulders slouching and face falling, exhausted from contorting her face and body to hopefully emanate the vibe that she was happy to be there. She was, truly. She loves supporting him. Supporting him just becomes ten times more exhausting when you are constantly self-conscious about how you are being perceived by the thousands of people in the arena, and worried that you are unwanted.

Despite how drained she is, sleep does not come easy. She is restless, her head refusing to stop going a hundred miles an hour. She isn’t even thinking about anything really, it’s just white noise, refusing to go away.

Finally, she reaches for her phone. Squinting at the sudden brightness, the text is typed and sent in less than a minute.

Sorry I couldn’t stay, but I’m proud of you. Electric as always.

Her heart settles when the small ‘delivered’ sign appears.

When she wakes up, there is no reply.

taglist (lmk if you wanna be tagged in the next part): @harrysfolklore @behindmygreyeyes @suspectedstyles @celestial-holland @xcaitlin101x @outofthisworl-d @haz-nn @zaynshoes @lissymarie22

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfic #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #harry styles fluff #bestfriend!harry #harry styles writing

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ketchupkio · 4 months

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I was reading ASAU, and while it is an awesome work (as are the AUs like Faction), its big impact on me were the gender conversations. If someone wanted to further investigate gender and being genderqueer/non-binary, what would you recommend for them? Thank you and I can't wait to see more of these fics soon!

omg thank you????????? omg omg omg????

first (but hardest) part is trying to dissect your feelings a little. it's a complicated process and the results can change over time, but it's worth it to have a good understanding of yourself!!

second, RESEARCH SO MUCH!!!! nonbinary wikis were invaluable to me when i was figuring stuff out. just seeing what other people call gender identities and define them as might be enough to open a door you didn't know existed.

a little background... at 17, i started identifying as non binary bc it was a blanket term that i thought fit best over the complicated feelings i was sorting out, and now at almost 25 i identify with both that AND being a trans man. it was a slow process letting go of femininity bc i was still attached to it, and i was leaving for college and wanted to express myself!! i still find myself in how i dressed then, but now it's more about striking a balance of what i want to present as, what's comfortable, and what's practical for my situation. just go into your gender self discovery journey with the knowledge that you can do whatever you want forever. queer history is full of complicated and contradictory reasoning for gender shenanigans, so pick whatever feels best to you (unless it's like.... being two spirit, which is an indigenous thing and has its own history that i'm not qualified to talk about. but other than closed/cultural things like that, go off!)

third, speak to other trans people!!!! not just people your age either, but old queers! they'll have valuable info and experiences that you cant get anywhere else. and i find reading/watching things about queer history fascinating. all in all, worth the effort for the wealth of knowledge you gain.

fourth, find a good support group that will be gentle and patient with you (and most importantly, AFFIRMATIVE!!!) if you wanna try out new names and pronouns too. ppl need to use your pronouns around you for u to know if you like them. i found the pronoun dressing room super helpful when i was trying to find a neopronoun set that worked for me too!! (i'm very happy with ce/cer, it feels nice, but they/ce/he are all equally me so i encourage ppl to just pick a set if they have trouble switching lol. may not work for you but it does for me!)

have fun and good luck! i hope you have an awesome experience! the road that a trans person walks isn't really easy, but there are a lot of good people to take solace with.

#transgender #replies #kio talks #hormones and everything is a whole other topic and it's highly regional #so if thats something you wanna do in the future there's research that you can do for your area #it might not even be as hard to get as you think!!!#but this is an introductory course lol #as always think about it real hard before you start telling a lot of people and/or doing permanent things #i waited like a year to come out and i still havent legally changed my name #(tho thats a not wanting to appear in court or pay the fee kind of thing)#ALSO U CAN TOTALLY START HORMONES AND THEN STOP THEM!!! DONT LET PPL SCARE U!!! UR STILL TRANS!!!#u dont have to do anything chemical or surgical either!! all up to u #u can do whatever u want forever #ageless soul au #sure it can go in the asau tag

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wincestation · 1 year

Text

Ultraviolence

Read on AO3: Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3

Squares Filled (Chapter 1): Free Space - Possession (not the demonic type) for @spnkinkbingo, Psychologist!Dean for @spnaubingo, and Childhood Trauma for @badthingshappenbingo

Ship: Sam/Dean

Overall Rating: Explicit

Summary: When did I turn into this? Dean thought, staring at the blank page on his screen. More importantly, how do I make sure that Sammy gets out okay from this mess? That was a rhetorical question, of course. The answer was the same as it has always been: by keeping him close.

Current Word Count: 3428

A/N: The approaching deadline for @spnkinkbingo finally made me come back here. I really hoped to write more this year (I remember being so excited for this bingo, and then I kinda went... poof.), but nonetheless, I hope you enjoy this one. This project is the only long fic I've written, and I'm actually still working on it, so I might need your encouragement and patience.

Warnings: Sam is going through some heavy emotional traumas, childhood abuse and nervous breakdowns. Dean is not helpful, and definitely doesn't fulfill his mural and ethical duties as a therapist. This is obviously not how any person who's taking care of you and your health should act. (tldr: Dean is Gaslighting-Gatekeeping-Girlbossing his way into Sam's mind/heart/pants.)

Chapter 1 under the cut || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3

The sirens were getting closer. With the flashes of the red and blue lights painting the motel room through its windows, it was clear: they were going to be there any moment now.

“They’re going to take me away,” Sam sobbed, his little face glistening with tears, and Dean’s heart clenched with agony.

“They are, Sammy.” He brushed the tears away from Sam’s cheeks. “Do you remember what I told you?” He asked, “Can you repeat it for me?”

“You love me more than anyone ever could.” Sam mumbled, sniffing his nose.

“And I always will.” Dean added softly.

“Please, De, I don’t wanna go with them!”

In the cacophony of light and sound, Dean felt as if they were in another dimension, one where no one could ever take Sam away from him. The footsteps from outside and the banging on the door took that fantasy away from him, killing it before it could take its first breath. Their father was passed out on the couch, blissfully unaware of the looming presence outside that was about to tear their lives apart.

“It’s okay, Sammy.” Dean squeezed his brother’s hand tightly and let him cry into his shoulder. All the while Dean stroked his hair, his back, his bruised arms. “No matter where you are - “

“ - I’ll always be yours,” Sam finished, a broken little whisper into Dean’s shoulder, just when the police broke in.

The boy sitting in front of him was visibly crying, and Dr. Smith handed over another tissue as he did his best pulling an empathetic smile. He let his patient ball his eyes out for a few minutes, sneaking discreet glances at the clock, wishing he could make it go faster using the sheer power of his will. He had a new patient coming at 4 o’clock and all he could manage was a brief look into his file, which was completely unprofessional. However, that wasn’t the reason why his fingers were itching for it; why his mind was a thousand miles away, anchored to the present only by the painfully normal-looking casefile and the information within it.

The clock finally reached its destination and Dean let his pen drop on his pad of paper. It was embarrassingly empty, because he didn’t hear a word the boy in front of him said for the entirety of his session. “See you next week. Remember practising the breathing technique I taught you, it works wonders.”

The boy nodded and left, looking a little less troubled than when he arrived, and Dean sighed with relief. Thank god he was one of the easier cases - those who just needed to vent - because Dean really couldn’t provide any more than that at the moment.

With a sip from his fresh, hot cup of coffee, Dr. Smith nodded thankfully at his secretary, who knew the schedule of his caffeine addiction better than himself, and opened the file to start reading:

Patient name: Wesson, Samuel.

Patient Age: 24.

Dean took out the man’s picture - a graduation picture, probably from high school - and stared into those hazel eyes, gaze moving along the strands of his shaggy brown hair. The boy in the photo was smiling at the camera, yet the smile didn’t quite reach his eyes - as if there was something stopping him from being truly happy. Dean stared at the picture for a few long moments before he had to force himself to put it down and continue reading. He usually wrote down bullet points from his patient’s files, things he wanted to bring up during their sessions, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it this time. A foreboding feeling took hold of him, stopping him from doing anything rational.

Taken from an abusive and neglectful household at the age of 8.

Several physical injuries (bruises, cuts, broken bones).

Father diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, substance abuse, and has shown a concerning obsession with weapons and army training (PTSD?).

Social services estimate the child suffered from severe trauma and emotional abuse by the hands of his father, as well as his older brother (age 12).

Dean closed the file and pushed it away from him. His mouth was dry, his heart racing, coffee already cold and forgotten. He didn’t need to continue reading. After all, he already knew what it was going to say.

The Smith in him knew what must be done. He should pick up the phone, call his secretary and tell her to transfer his next patient to one of his colleagues. His hand was hovering over the receiver, but it was the other part of him, the Winchester part that was denied and held back and left to rot in a dark corner of his mind, which had decided to show its ugly face and refused to let him pick up the phone.

The knock on the door came too soon. It was already 4 o’clock, and when Dean looked up, he knew which side won.

The young man in front of him cleared his throat nervously. “May I - ?”

“O-Oh, yes. Of course.” Dean gathered himself, quickly regaining his composure, but his eyes couldn’t stray from the young man’s face. “Please, have a seat.”

When the young man did, Dean added, “My apologies. You look a lot like someone I used to know.” He let the shy embarrassment into his voice intentionally, and it worked.

The tense shoulders slouched and the young man flashed a little smile. “Yeah, actually, I… thought that too for a second. Like I knew you from somewhere.” He sounded casual, but there was a trace of longing audible in his voice, making Dean hold onto his pen and paper even tighter, knuckles turning white and heart constantly pounding.

“So,” Dean started. “Samuel - ”

“It’s - you can call me Sam.”

“Okay,” Dean smiled faintly, “Sam.” The name felt ancient on his tongue, like it forgot how to properly say it. “What brings you here to see me?”

“I, uh.” Sam paused, only to let out a short laugh. “Where do I even begin?” He avoided Dean’s gaze, nervously scanning the room, playing with the hem of his jacket. Dean waited patiently.

“I mean… in that file,” Sam tried again, gesturing at the casefile that was laying on Dean’s desk, “There’s plenty of information about me, right?”

“Yes,” Dean examined him closely, almost hypnotised by each little movement, every nervous tic and twitch that shaped this weird, brother-looking creature sitting right in front of him. “That’s your history, though. I am more interested in how you are doing nowadays.”

Sam swallowed hard. “I needed to take care of a few… problems that I realised I had.”

Dean put his pen to the paper. “Problems?”

Sam smiled, but only with the right corner of his mouth. If Dean had any doubts, this half-smile wiped them all. “I met this… Girl.” Of course he did. “And, well, It was going pretty great - until it was time to say ‘I love you’.”

Fear of commitment , Dean noted on the paper. “Did you not love her back?” He asked, studying Sam’s expression that turned surprised.

“Well, no. It was more like…” He paused, contemplating. “... I couldn’t believe it. I knew, in my head, that she probably meant it. But I couldn’t feel… Like it was enough. Does that make sense?”

Dean thought for a moment before responding. He had a feeling he knew where this was going, but he asked anyway. “Did you love her?”

Sam dropped his head and stared at his lap. Dean could see him blinking rapidly; he noticed everything about him, attention undivided even for a fraction of a second. “I know I should have,” He said eventually. “Loved her, I mean. But I couldn’t say it and genuinely mean it. I knew it would hurt her, when I didn’t say it back, but I didn’t want to lie.”

Morals , Dean jotted down, pausing momentarily before adding: Honesty . Sam continued.

“And then I started thinking, do I know what love really is? Did I ever actually feel it? And that’s when I knew… You know. That I needed to talk to someone professional.” He seemed ashamed, and Dean saw this as an opportunity.

“That’s very sensitive of you, Sam.” Dean said, clicking his pen several times. “Most people won’t admit they need help, even to themselves. By doing that, well, it’s very brave of you.”

Sam looked at him, a tiny smile stretching those thin lips of his, hazel eyes catching the light between shades of green and gold and Dean’s breath hitched as he almost forgot how to breathe. “Thank you for saying that.”

Dean needed a moment to regain his self control, the silence was just on the edge of lingering too long. He tapped on Sam’s folder. “Is your childhood something you want to talk about?” He tried to sound as innocent as possible. “How much of it do you remember?” If it was too much, too soon, Sam could simply say “Not much” and they would change the subject. But when Sam parted his lips to answer, Dean realised he was on the edge of his seat, eager to hear his reply.

“Probably more than is good for me,” Sam admitted. “I know I’m not supposed to remember that much, but I do.” He looked at Dean. “Is that normal?”

Dean shifted in his chair. “The mind has many different ways to cope. Each person is different.” He scribbled down: Desire for normality . “Why do you think those memories aren’t good for you?”

Sam stared at him vacantly. “You read it, right?”

Dean paused for a moment. Note to self: do not hint that his trauma is a good thing. “I did.”

“Well,” Sam seemed uneasy, but not enough for Dean to interfere. “I remember my biological father made us fist fight, then take care of each other afterwards. I would clean the blood and mud, and my brother…” He fell silent. Dean’s heart threatened to burst out his chest. “My brother would stitch us up if it came to that,” Sam finished, almost whispering. The hollow expression turned into a frown, and he clenched a fist as he spoke. “I just realised how sick that is. I mean, I was eight, but he was a kid too, you know?”

Dean could only nod, afraid he would say too much if he dared to speak. The man in front of him, this… Sam; he was sensitive, intelligent. Awfully handsome, too, but in a humble, oblivious kind of way. Dean was mesmerised.

“When I think about it now,” Sam said after a pause, heaving a breath, looking pensive as he continued, “I know I should hate these memories. I should want them gone, but I don’t. I… I even miss them, in a way.” He looked down, staring at the floor. “The only thing I wish I could forget is when I was taken away.”

“Can you describe how you felt that day?” Dean’s voice was low and hoarse and he cleared his throat. “Again, you don’t have to go into details, if you don’t want to.” He quickly added.

Sam’s lips tugged a smile of small gratitude, which was gone in a flash as soon as he started talking again. “It’s funny. All these years and the one thing I remember most clearly is the sirens. It’s like I can still hear them.” He lifted his head and closed his eyes, and they were glistening as they opened. “I remember knowing what was going to happen. I cried, and my brother said it was okay, because no matter what he’ll always love me and I’ll always be his brother.” He said quietly, his eyes wet.

Dean wasn’t usually quick to tear up, but he had to expel some wetness from his eyes too. “I imagine it was hard, being torn away from him like that.” It took all his self control not to let his voice break. A part of him wanted to leap above the desk, embrace his little brother and fall apart around him; but there was another part, that wanted more than that, that instructed him to wait.

“I think about him all the time,” Sam admitted, “What his life is like, who he grew up to be. When they told me I couldn’t see him anymore, that he was bad for me - I didn’t understand it. I still don’t, really.” He looked at Dean as if he was expecting him to have an answer.

Dean put down his pen and paper and leaned his elbows on the desk. “It’s natural that you feel confused about him. You grew up adoring him, from what it sounds like. But staying around him was most likely going to hurt you, Sam.” It already did . It was the Smith in him talking, and he almost felt relieved. Maybe this was a battle he could win. He could still help Sam, could still do the right thing.

“Why?” Sam asked simply. Dean opened his mouth to answer, and then Sam added, quietly, almost to himself: “Dean would never hurt me.”

And something inside Dean clicked, like some part of him was being set free. “I know he wouldn’t.”

Sam was determined. “I mean it. He’d never. Even when he hit me, it - it felt like - “ Sam put his head in his palm. “God, I’m so fucking messed up.” He then blushed. “Sorry about that, Doctor.”

The “You can call me Dean” was about to escape his lips, and although he was dying to hear him say his name again, Dean stopped it just in time. Every ethics course and medical oath he ever took were thrown out the window, and the Smith in him was long gone, faded away to make room for something else, dark and twisted. “Tell me, Sam,” Dean said, and there was only Winchester in his voice. “When he hit you, how did that feel?”

Sam looked distressed. Tears were forming in his eyelashes.

When he finally spoke, his voice was like a song to Dean’s ears. “It felt like love,” He said, and Dean almost screamed in victory. That’s my boy , he thought, and let a wolfish smile spread across his face.

#my writing #wincest fanfiction #bad things happen bingo #badthingshappenbingo #spnkinkbingo #spnaubingo #sam wesson x dean smith #sam x dean

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sandersgrey · 2 years

Note

Hiiiii I’m the person who constantly update you on my shitty volunteer job almost every single week! I think we could come to a consensus here, regarding the crazy bitches I have to deal with in a weekly basis! I think, if Mr. Bilbo Baggins is given my job, he would’ve lost his shit a long long time ago! I wish I could share the stories with a wider audience, just because it really taught me a lot about humanity and humility. But due to the nature of the job, it’ll be quite hard for me to remain anonymous, and I don’t wanna lose my anonymity.

But I just wanna use this opportunity, to encourage everyone to appreciate volunteers! And to know that, everything we do we do it out of the kindness of our heart.

So please! Be a little bit patient with us, stopped antagonizing us, when you don’t get your own way! The reason why this organization is using volunteers, is because there isn’t enough staff. So stop asking to speak to my Manager!

Just so you know, your the reason why we are shortstaffed in the first place!

Most importantly, stop thinking that I’m replaceable! There are some jobs your local high school kids, looking for extra credit can’t do!

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk!

PS Alex! Thank you so much for listening to me!

Of course!! Volunteer work is extremely important, and we should appreciate volunteers more. Im sorry people aren't as mindful and thoughtful as they should be when interacting with you guys

#alex wont shut up #i do actually wanna do some volunteering eventually if i manage to gather the energy

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katsukikitten · 3 years

Text

Time spent with Todoroki.

Warnings: This is a Pro Hero aged up AU, think late twenties. Adult themes such as sex are to follow. Please enjoy

Shoto was by far your favorite sugar daddy. He showered you in lavish gifts and gave you the pipe often. He checked your bank account and made sure it never fell below a certain amount and paraded you around town like the Princess you were. But most importantly he was stoic. Doing nothing more than wiping you up with a warm rag once the two of you were finished, never clinging to you with desperate hands like many other sugar daddies had. Hoping their money would make you giddy and buy your love. Maybe it would have, had you not already run out of love for people. Your heart broken one too many times by a long term relationship causing you to vow that money was your only love.

People were just too disappointing.

Your contracts with Shoto were medium in length, anywhere between three to five months mostly because he likes to keep his "options open." Which filled you with pure lust for him, knowing you could get away with your kinks without worrying over some man falling for you.

Still, it was difficult for the Pro hero not to fall for you, at first he had no interest in love. Having sworn it off mostly for fear of failure thanks to his dysfunctional family. It was the main reason he started looking into sugar baby websites, he saw your profile picture and your bolded No strings attached. He liked the idea of that, loved it really and yet, he became tangled in you after the renewal of your second contract. He tried to suppress the warm feeling in his chest, he found it difficult more times than not.

Especially now, with you on your knees with his guicci jacket spread out on the tile of the bathroom floor as your lipstick clad lips wrap around his cock. Your cheeks hollowed and your eyes looking up at him with enchanting lust. He fists your hair shoving you further on his cock. Your eyes water as you gag softly and Todoroki is just thankful your makeup is waterproof.

The sight and the sounds make him groan while your manicured nails dig into his bare thigh. You rub your thighs for friction, moaning around his cock, it's enough to send Shoto over the edge. Hot ropes of cum hit the back of your throat as his grip on your styled hair tightens.

"Fuck Princess…." He moans bucking into your mouth, sharp eyes look down at you. Seeing a powerful man come undone for you is enough to keep you content for now.

"Sir will take care of you after the gala okay?" His cheeks are still a little red as he runs his hand over your hair. Lifting you off the floor before fixing himself. He gives you a light spin, making sure nothing scuffed your gorgeous designer dress before he exits the stall. Pushing back his long hair while you retouch your lipstick with a knowing smirk.

The two of you waltz back to the party, sans his jacket, abandoning the designer garment without a second thought. The price of it was barely a drop in his bucket. It could have been half of his bucket for all he cared, his mind always swimming with thoughts of you. He places his hand on the small of your back as he guides you back to the table, dinner half forgotten once your hand wandered towards his crotch for a tease.

"F...find the bar okay?' Izuku asks as you take your seat, your sly hand going for your wine. Uraraka blushes when you give her a wink.

"Just fine." Shoto says sipping his whisky.

"So who's won awards so far?" You ask with gleaming eyes, Izuku smiles.

"Kaachan for most villains caught. Kirishima for the safest feeling hero, myself for rescue ratio." He holds up his small little trophy, "And you, Shouto, for most mysterious."

"What about the rankings? Did we miss that?"

"No they are about to announce it!" Uraraka exclaims, eyes glittering with excitement and wine. Her chestnut eyes slide over to her emerald eye date, hoping for the best for him.

The announcer steps to the stage, his sapphire blue suit catching everyone's eye as he takes the center.

"Ladies and gentlemen, it has been a night filled with congratulations and cheer but now is the moment you've been waiting for, tonight we will reveal the top three heroes. Voted in by a strenuous board appointed by the fans, we finally present the BIG THREE!"

Some tables erupt in cheers while the host takes his dramatic pause, when the sound dies down the host brandishes the golden envelope.

As he announces your hand wanders again, playing with your favorite toy, Shouto's face gives way nothing as the host drags out the awards. Explaining how long the winner's speeches should be. Soon Shouto cannot ignore your hands creeping on his clothed cock that throbs beneath your fingers. He knows he can't wait through what's bound to be a half an hour. He rises excusing himself dragging you with him before you're being cornered against a wall in some random closet.

"So impatient, princess." He bites out, kissing your throat, sliding down to your exposed collar bone while his hand ventures between your thighs. Calloused pads circling your puffy clit as you let out a loud moan that's swallowed by the cheering of the gala room. Impatient himself he undoes his pants, stroking himself with his free hand while you cum on his fingers.

After the coil in your stomach snaps for a third time he's satisfied, kissing you as he aligns the tip of his dick to your quivering entrance.

"Fuck, Shouto. Fuck me please, sir!" You beg, making his head spin, alcohol mingling in the small dark space.

"Be patient kitten. Sir will fuck you right baby." He grunts, sheathing himself into your soaking core. You cry out, clawing at his back through his shirt. The smell of biting cold hair mingling with the hearty smoke of a bonfire engulfs you as you press your face into his chest. He lifts both of your legs, strong hands grabbing onto thick thighs as he fucks into you with a deadly pace. Slapping skin and lewd wet sounds echo back to the two of you, encouraging his pistoning hips.

"Listen to those sounds Princess, your pussy sounds so pretty." He bites at your ear as you endlessly moan and whimper into his chest. Cunt clenching as he drives over your spongy spot, the head of his cock going deeper with each thrust. Soon it all becomes too much, your vision spots panting as you cry out in ecstasy, body ridged and arching to meet him.

"Cumming on my cock already?" He coos, fucking you through your next orgasim as your legs shake around him. Toes pointed in your red bottoms as you attempt to hold onto him for dear life.

"S..sir! You cry out, "I'm gonna...nnngghhh."

He ruts into you, pressing you further into the wall as he frees up one hand to play with your throbbing clit. Rubbing harsh circles as he loses focus on his precise thrusts that turn sloppy. His eyes too focused on you as you cum, milking his cock. Your eyes flutter, desperately attempting to hold eye contact as one hand palms your breast and the other scratches at the skin at the nape of his neck. Your tongue lulls out just a bit as your mouth makes a sinful O shape, a few tears of over stimulation fall down your cheeks as he continues to fuck into your wet cunt. The sight makes him explode into you, warm spurts of cum causing you to whimper and clench in delight as he ruts until he is done. He sets his sweaty forehead against yours, panting as words claw up his throat.

"I love..." He whispers, catching himself just in time, "Your tight cunt."

He kisses you, hoping you don't think anything more of it.

After a few minutes, and Shouto's cock softens, he withdraws. Wiping you up with a wipe from your purse as the two of you check the other for fluids. A drunken cat smile plastered on your lips as you reapply your lipstick, wiping away the stains on his dark grey shirt and collar.

The two of you step into the hall just in time as the doors start to open. Quickly and calmly you grab for your pack of cigarettes, your normal alabi, placing the stick in your mouth. Shouto, much like a gentleman, lights it as you inhale to keep the tip a burning ember. Gently blowing the smoke over his clothes, careful to avoid his face as you waft the burning stick around yourself as if it were an incense. Knowing good and well the smell of smoke always hides the salty smell of sex. Quickly you extinguish it on an ice cube that Todoroki provides, you toss the cube in the closet and the half of a smoke into your burkin slamming it shut just as a small group of sidekicks approach.

"Shouto! Wow! I can't believe it was a three way tie this year! Congrats to you, Deku and Dynamight!" They drunkenly cheer, "It's crazy how that happened."

"You're so secretive, your manager accepted the award on your behalf even though you were here tonight!"

A stream of people dot on your date as you cling to his muscular arm while you harbor a secret of your own. Cum dribbles between your thighs as you think of his sweaty head against yours. It feels good to be a Pro hero sugar baby.

"You staying the night again?" Shouto asks as he presses a cold water bottle to your palm, your body covered in a sheen of post sex sweat from a week's worth of fun. You give him a small smile as you sit up, tits bouncing as you readjust entirely. You can feel his icy hot gaze as it rakes over your body, feeling the goose flesh prick along your skin as it does with the threat of an oncoming summer storm.

"I wanna discuss the renewal of our contract. Plus we have a final date per the expiring one." He says as he rises, heading towards the luxurious ensuite to start a shower for you both.

"Hmmm guess I could. How much longer do we have left?" You never really paid attention to this things, always being satisfied with whatever Shouto gave you.

"Two weeks." He returns back from the bathroom, grabbing his wallet from his bedside table. Pulling out his onyx black card, he places it in your hand. His eyes holding yours, you give a devilish grin.

"Sir has a lot of paperwork for the agency to do today. Buy a dress I want to fuck you in and anything else you want to match okay baby girl?" He leans down to give your forehead a kiss while you giggle. Unable to hide the giddy that bubbles beneath your skin, you wrap your arms around him.

"Thank you sir!" You exclaim, pepper his cheeks with kisses as you pull back, "Do I get to pick the date again?"

"Mmhmm." He encourages, running his hand up your bare bare as you squeal with delight. You rush to the bathroom before he slowly follows behind. While under the hot stream the two of you make out for far too long, tongues fighting as the two of you exchange laughs before you add a playful statement that stays with the two toned hair man as he sits in his boring home office.

"I'm going to get a dress so classy and sinful you'll fuck me on the spot!"

His eyes wander to the photo on his desk, the one of your first date. The one you insisted the two of you take after a month of late booty calls since he paid for the "girlfriend" package. The two of you are bundled in warm coats, you cling to his firey side as you laugh and he just barely smirks.

Looking back he thinks this is when he started to fall for you. You had never been ice skating before and insisted on going while the two of you were in NYC for important PR interviews for the cold and mysterious hero. Because that's what people did in the movies while in NYC, put on their skates at the Rockefeller rink to glide along the ice beneath the sparkling lights of the giant Christmas tree. It was busy, he opted for no skates, as he did better without but he helped you lace yours. Being ginger for the first time in his life as he helped you onto the ice, after demanding a moment of independence you had fallen straight onto your ass. Giving Shouto second hand embarrassment but instead of yelling, crying out or giving up, you laughed. Genuinely laughed as you reached for his steady hand, captivating the whole rink for a moment. It felt like magic had washed over the ice, as snow slowly danced into your hair and the colorful lights danced across your eyes. Just like that the spell was broken with a flash of light. A stranger approached to give you a small tip on how to skate and the polaroid he had taken. You thanked them with a smile placing the photo into your coat pocket leaning into Shoto to share a secret.

"Now we have our first 'date' immortalized!" You had giggled, gliding across the ice as if you were ethereal, hands outstretched for Shoto to join you.

He wonders how you're doing at the shops. He occasionally gets a text or two from you. Sexy pictures of you in the changing room as you obviously buy lingerie as well.

He fists his cock enough times he gets no work done and by the time he convinces himself enough is enough you come home.

Wearing that damned devilish smirk.

And so another week passes in the four walls of his bedroom. Your bank account as stuffed as your pussy as you bounce on his heating and cooling cock.

"Fuck, baby fuck." Is all Todoroki can say as you chase your own high. His blunt nails clawing at your thighs as your tits bounce. Your mouth opens into that gorgeous O as you seek out that delicious friction on your clit. The coil in your stomach snaps as your humping becomes erratic and sloppy but still enough for your tight cunt to spasm wonderfully over Todoroki. So nice is the sight, sound and smell of you that Todoroki pumps his hips up into you twice before he paints your velvety walls, his eyes focused on you.

"Fuck." He presses his sweaty head into the silk of his pillow case. Two toned hair clinging to his forehead. You lean over and kiss his cheek.

"Thanks for the ride Pro hero." You wink before you dismount. Stretching towards the sky once your feet hit the warmed hardwoods, you begin to make your way towards the bathroom. Phone in hand.

"I wanted to talk about extending your contract." Todoroki says, staring after you, "At dinner tonight."

"It expired tonight right?" You say, looking over your shoulder while your phone lights up with an alert, "No need for dinner."

"What do you mean?" He calls to you as you start the shower.

"I mean, I think we should let the contract expire. Keep things fresh you know? Keep our options open?"

He jumps to his feet and begs the urgency to die in his step. Calmly with somber steps making his way to the ensuite. He finds you already in the shower, water washes away the smell of sweat. The smell of him as your phone glares up at him. He taps the screen and your recent notifications wave at him as he stares down.

Reading one of them in horror.

Todoroki isn't sure why he feels this way as he looks at your phone on his vanity. As if the world fell from beneath his feet. His throat burns as he stares at the illuminated glass, spiraling as steam clouds his vision that begins to blur. He knew what he signed up for, he wanted this.

This detached, heart hidden exchange in hopes of choking down the loneliness

But he never expected that when this ended it would feel as if his heart had been ripped out, stepped on and crushed beneath the heel of one of your red bottomed shoes.

"Come on aren't you joining me for our last shower iced cutie?"

"Uh yes I'm coming." He steps into the shower as the push alert on your phone burns into his brain.

"Kirishima Eijirou has put in an offer."

#todoroki x reader #todoroki sugar daddy #bnha au #aged up au

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stargazing-dreamer-girl · 4 years

Text

This Next Chapter

Part 3 to Nothing Breaks Like a Heart

This is the third and final part. I hope you guys enjoy it!

Not here. Not now. He couldn’t be. She shouldn’t be.

Your first instinct was to go and embrace Jughead. A year’s conditioning kicking in. But you contained yourself and pressed the urge down. That wasn’t something you could do anymore. You were left silently wondering what Jughead was doing there. Had you missed something when you were still together? But then again, you had missed that he had fallen in love with someone else.

Did she know that Jughead was here? Did she know things about his South Side life that he never entrusted you with? Where was she? Maybe she was a Serpent and that was why he was there.

Either way, you couldn’t deal with him right now. Your heart broke a little more at the sight of him. You didn’t even know that was still possible. Just as you started to feel better, he had to pop back up and bring back the memories of that evening.

Jughead was still looking at you. His mind was racing with possible explanations as to why you were at the Whyte Wyrm which was exactly what he had tried to keep from happening. Somewhere deep inside he was happy to see you. His heart had jumped when he first laid eyes on you in that booth, but the more rational part inside him wouldn’t take it. He went through the heartbreak as well. He felt the pain as well. And now what? It was all for nothing! You were here when you were supposed to be on the North Side continuing on with your life!

He had tried to protect you and you apparently had just calmly walked straight into the lion’s den. It was quite infuriating. The plan was to keep you as far as possible from this place and these people.

He couldn’t help but wonder though how it came to be. You sitting next to Sweet Pea. You in the Whyte Wyrm. With Sweet Pea. A surge of jealousy overcame him which he had no right to feel. You were not with him anymore. But you being with Sweet Pea didn’t sit right with him.

There was no other choice. He had to talk to you, even though he didn’t know what he would say. He had to get you away from this place, this life. Ignoring the people who were asking him if he was alright after he had been standing in the same spot for a while staring into seemingly nothing he only had eyes for you as he made his way through the crowd.

“I can’t be here!” you exclaimed as you saw that Jughead was moving towards your booth. You weren’t ready for a confrontation. Not yet. You would break, if you talked to him now, you knew. The voices of the people around you moved into the background as you hastily grabbed your phone and wallet.

He watched you scrambling for your stuff before you jumped up and ran out of the bar. He looked at the door for several more seconds after you had already disappeared again. Maybe, if he just hoped enough, you would appear back through it. But you never did. It was a rather strange encounter, but it left him longing for your company and touch. If he hadn’t realized before how much he missed you, it was clear to him now. With an ache in his chest he could almost feel your skin under his fingertips and your smell in his nose.

You were standing outside, just around the corner where Sweet Pea had parked his bike. The cold evening air sent shivers all over your body. You rubbed your arms in an attempt to produce some warmth that your jacket would offer if you hadn’t forgotten it in your rush to get out of the building.

At the sound of footsteps you squeezed your eyes shut praying that it wasn’t Jughead who had come after you. Anybody would be better. You looked up to the sky and took deep breaths before allowing yourself to look at who had come after you.

To your relief it was Toni who came stepping around the corner, your jacket in her hand, which you gladly took and put on, and a cautious smile on her face. She didn’t even have to ask for you to understand her question.

“Not here. Okay?”

She agreed immediately and offered to take you to her trailer where you could also spend the night. You hadn’t expected this kindness from an almost stranger but were thankful that you received it. Some people seemed to actually care about you after all.

So, you told Toni about everything that had happened between you and Jughead, from your first meeting over the beginning of your relationship to the breakup. Toni listened in silence. Sometimes, when you couldn’t talk anymore or choked on your sobs she took your hand and tried to comfort you. Weirdly enough, her encouragements and talking about it helped. You realized that before today you hadn’t talked to anyone about what happened. You kept it all inside, let it build up until you cracked. That’s why talking about it now was so hard on you. You opened the floodgates you had sealed shut for so long.

But Toni didn’t judge. Not when you needed to stop to get some air, not when you were a sobbing mess on her bed. On the contrary, she made you a hot chocolate and waited patiently for you to tell your story. It’s been a while since you’ve felt that heard.

“When did it happen?” She cautiously asked.

“About two months ago,” you replied, wiping the last tear off your cheek. You assumed you looked much disheveled right now, big red eyes, red cheeks, your hair a royal mess from all the times you went through it while talking. “Why?”

Toni shrugged. She didn’t want to tell you that that was just about the time Jughead had joined the Serpents, that he had never talked about a girl or that he always had this sadness in his eyes she hadn’t known where it came from. She wouldn’t tell you that now. The girl before her was broken and if Toni was wrong in her assumption and told her, she couldn’t forgive herself.

Instead, she kept it to herself and offered you some clothes to sleep in. After all the crying you fell asleep quickly and dreamt about bars and bikes and snakes.

When you woke up the next morning, Toni wasn’t there. You looked around the trailer, if maybe she left a note but there was nothing to be found apart from some clothes that were laid out on the bed. You assumed they were meant for you, so you got dressed and checked your phone. A notification from a few minutes ago was dancing on your screen. It was a text from Sweet Pea who would pick you up in a bit. As you were about to type in a reply, you already heard the roar of his bike outside the trailer.

You grabbed your stuff and left the trailer to be greeted by a smiling Sweet Pea. “Let’s go eat something!” He didn’t allow you to protest, so you got on behind him and he drove away.

That was how you ended up at Pop’s, at your wish. It was never too early for fries and milkshakes.

“You wanna talk about what happened last night?” He asked before he stole one of your fries with a cheeky grin.

You let out a deep sigh but told him what you told Toni yesterday, just a little shorter. It didn’t feel as bad this time. Having talked about it at least once before saw to it that you didn’t end up in tears again. It made you realize that it really would get easier with time and with friends to talk to.

After your tale a heavy feeling laid upon the both of you as you sat in silence but Sweet Pea was quick to dissolve it.

For the rest of the day you drove around with Sweet Pea, joking around and having a great day all around. When he dropped you off at your house in the evening he told you he’d be back in the morning to drive you to school. You tried to convince him that it wasn’t necessary, but he knew that you barely went and wanted to change it. You reluctantly gave in, but when you saw him the next morning you were quite happy that you didn’t have to do this yourself, that he was there for you, figuratively and literally.

That went on for a month. He would pick you up at your house, drive you to school, get you from there again in the afternoon and then you would spend the rest of the day together doing homework, eating at Pop’s, sometimes hanging out with Toni and Fangs. If for some reason he couldn’t be there, one of the others was. You always asked Sweet Pea if you weren’t a burden, if it wasn’t a nuisance driving to the North Side each day for her, but he shook her off every time assuring her that he liked to spend the time with her.

It was Friday evening. Sweet Pea had come over after your mom had left. Now you were sprawled out over the couch, the giant Sweet Pea taking up most of the space, but you fought for your spot in the corner. His head was turned towards the TV where a movie was running that you hadn’t paid any attention to from the start. He noticed that your mind was not on the movie, so he grabbed the remote and paused it. Before he could ask what was going on you already voiced your thoughts.

“I want to talk to Jughead!”

“Wh- why? What? Why now?”

“I think, I’m ready. I need to speak with him. I need closure.” You tried to explain. “Can you set something up? I… don’t want to text him.” You added quietly. The thought of opening up your old chats with Jugheads scared you. More importantly, the memories and old feelings that might come with it. Sweet Pea asked again if you were certain you wanted to do this, but you weren’t about to back out now. This was what you needed.

So, Sweet Pea set it up and on Sunday afternoon you were seated in a booth at the Whyte Wyrm waiting for Jughead. Your leg wouldn’t stop shaking.

“Hey! You can do this! I’ll be right over by the bar. Just call if you need me!” Sweet Pea assured you. But when Jughead walked through the door and Sweet Pea left you didn’t feel so sure anymore.

Jughead looked like he wanted to go in for a hug when he got to the table but thought better of it, so instead he quietly sat down.

None of you said anything at first. The tension between you felt unfamiliar, unreal, but it was there, painfully sitting upon your shoulders, reminding you of what was and what had happened. You were grasping for the words you had prepared, everything you wanted to say to him but your mind was blank now that he actually sat in front of you.

He spoke your name, making you look up at him. “What are you doing here?” The question threw you off. Wasn’t it obvious what you were doing here?

“I wanted to talk to you after how-” “I don’t mean that! I mean, what are you doing at the Whyte Wyrm? What are you doing with Sweet Pea? This is not your crowd!”

“Well, it is now! Sweet Pea is my friend. He helped me out of… a mess I was in after our breakup.” Talking about it, you just wanted to cry, but you wouldn’t do that now. You would be strong and keep a straight face. Don’t let him know how hard it was for you! Don’t let him know how much it broke you!

“No, you don’t understand!” He took his beanie off in frustration tucking at his dark hair. “You can’t be here! It’s dangerous!”

“I’m not gonna let you tell me where I can or can’t be! This is my life! I can be where I want. I can be with whomever I want. I can be who I want!” You declared. “And I’m not stupid! I’d say I can assess the danger I’m in.”

Jughead groaned and slammed a hand on the table making the people around you turn their heads towards the two of you. At the bar, Sweet Pea already got up from his chair to intervene at any moment, but you gestured to him that you had it handled.

“You just don’t get it! I had to join, but I wanted you out of all of this! I broke up with you to protect you! Do you know what I’ve been through to keep you away from this place? I had to pretend that there’s someone else when I’ve only over loved you!”

“What you’ve been through?” You snapped. “Jughead, for two months after you broke up with me, I was nothing! I was lost! I drank and smoked and took whatever pills people offered me. You broke me! I really thought that I couldn’t live without you, but then Sweet Pea came into my life and he helped me. He made me realize that I don’t need the alcohol or the drugs to live happily, but most importantly, I don’t need you, Jughead! I asked you here, so that maybe we could talk about it, to get some closure, but you know what I realized? I don’t need anything from you anymore, Jug! You might actually have been the greatest mistake of my life. Goodbye!”

You stood and walked over to Sweet Pea. Everything that just happened replayed in your mind. “Fuck, I just did that, didn’t I?” You were surprised by yourself.

“Hell yeah, you did!” Sweet Pea affirmed and pulled you into a much needed hug. “Let’s get out of here!”

You left the bar hand in hand with Sweet Pea leaving Jughead and that chapter of your story behind you.

That night you kept thinking about the Serpents and Sweet Pea and your life in Riverdale and you came to a conclusion. You had to leave. Start fresh somewhere far away from here. As soon as the thought manifested in your mind you knew it was the right thing to do. You were not running away, no. You were walking towards a new, better life for yourself. Without toxic people and bad habits. It was a chance to start anew, make better choices and think more carefully about who you let into your life and heart.

Telling Sweet Pea might have been the hardest thing you’ve ever done, but he was understanding and supportive. His offer for you to join the Serpents was nice and thoughtful, but it would also mean being around Jughead a lot which wasn’t good for your mental health.

So, when it was time, Sweet Pea brought you to the bus station to see you off into your new adventure. It was only fitting that the guy who pulled you out of the dumps and who you’ve been relying on as a clutch would be there when you took that next step on your own two feet.

#riverdale #jughead x reader #jughead jones x reader #riverdale fanfiction #part 3 #nothing breaks like a heart #my reason for this #x reader #x you #platonic!sweet pea x reader

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rainydaysofspring · 4 years

Text

My first ever fic on here...

Prompt: She had a bad day and just needed something to make it better. Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x MC (Dr. Liliana Summers) Trigger warnings: mentions of death, poorly written medical procedures, Angst and fluff

Word Count: 1.6k

All Liliana wanted was, for this day to be finally over. Ever since she got up this morning in her bedroom, the day has just been getting worse and worse. It seemed like every minute, something went wrong.

It all started with her favorite light blue pair of scrubs, with her name embroidered, getting stained when she spilled her coffee this morning and her, not having enough time on her hands to get changed again. When she left her apartment, she noticed she had forgotten her keys, but of course, after she closed the door. Her only option was to go home with one of her roommates later on or to get there after either Aurora or Sienna went to their flat since both of them had shorter shifts today. The T was hopelessly overcrowded, the guy behind her eyeing her as if she would be a raw slice of meat. If only he knew she had a boyfriend much, much better than him. The thought of Ethan, already at work, made her grumpy state a little bit better, the thought of seeing him in a few minutes even more. She left the train and walked to the hospital, however it started pouring rain the second she stepped off the roofed area. She had the choice between being late and staying dry. If Zaid ever found out, she was late, he would be chewing her out again. So, she took option b: Getting soaked, but being on time.Steeping foot in the atrium of Edenbrook, Liliana was completely drenched in water, her scrubs ruined even more. She somehow got to the locker room without drawing too much attention to her by waiting patients and their families and changed into a fresh and, more importantly, dry pair of scrubs.

Luckily the resident survived rounds, without any further disturbances, so she almost thought her bad day would take a turn for the better. That thought was made way to early, how she noticed later.Liliana saw, that all her regular patients were stable and taken care of, she decided to put in a few hours at the free clinic. The halls were full, as always. When she got to one of the nurses, she assigned a few patients to her, the first one was a nice kid with a high fever. The child's mother also described that the toddler couldn't keep any food down. Liliana quickly diagnosed the girl with the stomach flu and was on her way to the next patient. That's how the hours went by, stepping from one patient to another, nothing majorly dramatic.

But then, her last patient proved again, what this day was: horrible.As Liliana entered the room and introduced herself, she wasn't greeted with the patient telling her what's wrong, instead, he complained about almost everything." I came here three hours ago, I'm an emergency, I need to be taken care of immediately." Liliana tried to reason with him and to explain to him, that their nurses decide who sees a Doctor first based on the severity of the case, not on the time the patients have spent waiting. "Then your nurses are either blind or didn't get proper education! Don't you see that I'm an emergency?" The resident remembered Mr. Platt, the giant PITA she had to treat in her intern year. The man in front of her had a great resemblance to him, in how he spoke to her. When asked, what his symptoms were, her patient just showed her his hand, where she saw a light burn. So much for the emergency, she thought. While treating the injury, the man complained several times more, either about how something the Doctor did wasn't to his liking or how Liliana didn't look like a doctor, more than a nurse. When he brought that up, in combination with the words "hot" and "sexy" she was disappointed that Ethan was not around, his response might have made the patient shut up and learn some respect for the work of both, nurses and doctors. She finally finished his treatment and left the free clinic for today.

Walking up to the diagnostics floor, she thought about Ethan and how she hadn't seen him the whole day long. That fact alone made her mood go down a few inches more. After she checked all of her other patients again, she decided she would visit someone.She eventually made it to the pediatric wing to see on one of her former patients who she formed a bond with, a 9-year old girl named Amelia. Liliana diagnosed her a while ago with cancer, staying with her through her first chemotherapy was certainly the start of a great friendship with the little girl. Anytime she swung by, even just to say hello, a smile formed on the lips of the 9-year-old, she was happy to see her favorite doctor in the hospital. Liliana's main goal was, to cheer her up a bit since hospitals and chemotherapy were certainly scary for a girl that age.She went to her usual room, Number 159, just to find the bed empty. An uneasy feeling crept up her spine on her way to the nurse's station. She asked Lynn, her favorite nurse on the pediatric team, about Amelia and the answer could've made her cry right there, in the middle of the ward."Amelia died last night. She fought so hard, but the cancer was too strong, poor thing." Crushed, Liliana quickly thanked Lynn and excused herself.

She eventually reached the locker room and was relieved, when she found it empty. Enough time to calm down a bit and then finally go home and lay in her bed. The moment she sat down on the bench, her pager went off. "What on earth now? I wanna go home!" she exclaimed. The message on the pager read: "Car Crash, multiple vehicles. All hands on deck." With a groan, Liliana stepped out in the halls again and made her way down the pit. When she arrived, all she found was controlled chaos. Paramedics wheeling new patients in, many of them in critical condition. She sprung into action and commanded her intern, Esme, to do triage, just like she had to last year.

The resident took a patient herself, a woman in her late 30s, with a shard of glass stuck in her abdomen. She was unconscious, intubated, but stable, for the moment. The resident, along with several other doctors begun to treat her, when suddenly, she heard a loud beeping sound echo through the room. Someone yelled "CODE BLUE, CODE BLUE!" ´, while Liliana already sprung into action and began chest compressions on the woman. Another doctor grabbed paddles, in the team they tried to get her heart back to beating.After 62 Minutes of doing CPR and trying to bring the patient back, they gave up. Someone called the dreadful words "Time of Death: 10.17 p.m.” and slowly, the room got emptier until it was just her in there.

The second loss this day hit her hard. Harder, then it should, she knew that herself.She heard the door open but didn't care who entered. Ines' voice spun her out of her trance, slowly getting her back to reality. "Liliana, how long have you been here? You look tired." Her voice, filled with concern rang out. Liliana did not answer, she just shook her head. "Go home. We've got the situation under control, you can end the day." Ines told her. While muttering a quick "Thank you", Liliana left the room and didn't even care to change out of her work clothes, just grabbing her things and getting on the T.She drove a few stops further, then she needed to for her apartment, since the only thing she wanted after this day, was to see Ethan.

While getting off the T and walking to Ethans Home, Liliana couldn't hold her tears in anymore.She finally reached the apartment complex he lived in and rang the bell. A confused voice answered, but when he was greeted with your sobs only and a quiet "It's me.", he opened up immediately. Liliana took the stairs and finally stood in front of the man she loved, whos presence she needed so much after the day she has had. "Lili. What happened?" Hearing the nickname only made her cry more, her sobs limiting her ability to breathe. Liliana stepped into the flat, being greeted by a happy Jenner, who jumped at her legs. Ethan closed the door, approaching his girlfriend cautiously, he didn't want to startle her. After Jenner was done with his greeting, Ethan slowly came nearer and just engulfed Liliana in a hug.

On that feeling, the young doctor in his arms almost crumbled. They both fell to the ground, when Liliana's legs gave out under her, the exhaustion and sadness of this day taking over her body completely. Ethan pressed her head against his shoulder, stroking her hair gently, muttering things like "It's gonna be okay." When she didn't seem to calm down and started hyperventilating, even more, he picked her head up from his shoulder and cupped it with his hands, forcing her to look at him. "Lili. Calm down, breathe with me, okay? I need you to take a deep breath." As she tried her best, Ethan continued to encourage her, watching her slowly calming down. A while later, when the tears stopped cascading down Liliana's Cheeks, he picked her up bridal style and carried her over, into his bedroom, slowly laying her down on the soft mattress. The feeling of the soft fabric under her made her realize how tired she was. Ethan got into bed next to her, watching his girl as she drifted away, into a peaceful sleep she desperately needed.

So, what do you think? My first upload with my own writing, I finally did it. I apologize if any grammar errors are in there, I tried my best and English is not my native language.

Love, Lili

#open heart #ethan ramsey #ethan x mc #ethan ramsey x mc #ethan jonah ramsey #mc #prompt #angst #fluff #romance

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gt-fluffy-vore · 4 years

Text

Mindtrapped Chapter two: Adrenaline

Sanders Sides fanfiction

Warnings: GT, tricking people into being afraid, major panic attack, almost vore but nothing actually happens?, accidental self-harm, people turning into animals, mention of violent images

2541 words

It had been three weeks since they’d gotten stuck, and in that time Logan had done nothing but study. He performed countless experiments on the four Sides individually and wrote down absolutely everything. It turns out the room they woke up in was part of a facility of some kind. It was the farthest room on the east side of the building. Weirder yet, the facility was… seemingly there for them. They each had a bedroom, there was a living room, a kitchen, bathroom, and quite a few other miscellaneous rooms, one of which was a lab, which contained a large desk and all the paper Logan could ever need.

The first thing they discovered was that the involuntary size-shifting applied to all of them and was most likely triggered by adrenaline, according to Logan’s notes. Although, no one had ever actually seen Logan involuntarily change size or form, so as far as they knew, it only applied to the other three.

They never did find Remus or Janus, which meant that, thankfully, wherever they were, those two weren’t stuck with them. But that worried Logan more than anything as to what that could mean for Thomas, which only brought up more questions and less answers…

Another thing they discovered almost immediately, was… for some reason, stuck in this place, unable to use their own abilities correctly, they also had taken on normal, real-world, human functions. They had to learn to share a bathroom, to cook, to establish proper sleep schedules, but most importantly they had to learn how to keep themselves from getting hurt in the process. Now that they couldn’t manipulate themselves at will, they couldn’t repair themselves if they got burned, or cut, ect. Currently Logan was examining Virgil’s arm, where he’d cut himself open trying to use a kitchen knife the day before. “I believe these samples should be sufficient.”

“What are you trying to find with this anyway?”

“I am trying to decipher exactly how our DNA structure has changed, and… why we have them at all, being figments of Thomas’s imagination.”

“Well, tell me if you figure it out.” Virgil turned to leave, but before he could, Patton came bounding around the corner towards the door.

“Logan! Have you figured out anything new?” Wham! He fell face-first over a cord laying over the doorway and… suddenly his massive form filled half of the lab, stuck half-in and half-out of the room, his waist filling every inch of the doorway. “Uh, we got a big problem… again.”

“And... a really small one.”

Logan looked down at the now two inch tall Virgil. “Oooh…” He took a deep breath and looked between the giant Patton and shrunken Virgil. They waited patiently until he flung a hand up in a way that clearly said ‘duh!’. “These involuntary changes are triggered by adrenaline. So if we can force a rush of adrenaline it should cause another dramatic change, hopefully in our favor.”

“Hopefully?!”

“Well, we can’t be entirely certain that it will elicit the opposite effect, but with any luck… Virgil, may I speak with you privately for a moment?”

“Uh, I guess…”

Nodding, Logan crouched down and held a hand down to him. Virgil flinched back and looked up at him like he was crazy. “It will only be for a moment.” Groaning, Virgil climbed on his palm and found himself completely frozen, clinging to Logan’s pinky finger desperately, eyes squeezed shut. As Logan carefully set him on the desk and sat down, Patton got the hint and started humming to keep himself from hearing them. Even so, Logan leaned down and whispered. “I apologize.” Virgil looked confused, so he explained. “You were unsettled, were you not?”

“Oh…”

He nodded slightly, then moved on. “I think I know how to raise Patton’s adrenaline enough to cause a sufficient reaction. But, it will involve some… acting…”

A few minutes later, Patton stopped humming abruptly as Logan turned around, holding Virgil up by the hood with one hand and holding an open pair of scissors around him with the other. “Uh, watcha got there, uh… L-Logan?” His breathing was already strained.

Logan narrowed his eyes and forced a grin over his face. “Have you ever wondered what one of us would look like if we were just a half?”

Patton’s giant face twisted with horror. “L-Logan, let’s t-talk about this!”

“What’s there to talk about, Patton? Why don’t we just see?”

Logan closed the scissors just slightly and Virgil thrashed violently. “Patton, please!”

Patton was looking desperate, eyes darting madly, breathing heavy. “Please, Logan, put him down!”

“What if I don’t… want to?”

“Logan, please! I… I don’t wanna have to hurt you!”

“Patton, you don’t have to.” Suddenly his expression had returned completely to normal and he set Virgil down in his palm and set the scissors back on his desk. Virgil did, once again, cling to Logan’s finger — he didn’t like being that high up, and he hated being that small. “I’m not going to do anything to Virgil.”

He sniffled and wiped at some tears that were starting to form. “Wh-What?”

“I’m not going to hurt Virgil. How tall are you right now?”

He looked down at himself, then realized he was standing up in the doorway and squealed. “You never were going to… I’m sorry I thought you’d do something like that. So you both faked that… for me? To fix my size? How’d you do it?!”

“As I have said before, these changes are triggered by adrenaline. So we simply had to cause a large enough rush of adrenaline, and that caused another involuntary shift, luckily one that was to our preference.”

“So whenever that happens we just gotta get me worked up and it’ll fix it?”

“No. Causing a rush of adrenaline triggers an involuntary shift. When we caused you to get a rush of adrenaline it triggered an involuntary shift that… shrunk you. And since you were already larger than your normal height, it counteracted your size and returned you to normal. The only reason I attempted something so dangerous is because you were blocking the only exit to this room, and now that we all have real-world bodily functions one of us would eventually need a restroom or the kitchen. We were very lucky this time, but in the future please do not try to raise your adrenaline levels, as it could just as easily have simply exaggerated your size further.”

“So… don’t get worked up on purpose.”

“Please do not.”

“Okay. But, uh, how do we fix the other little problem we got on our hands? Or, on your hands.”

“Oh, of course! I apologize, Virgil, I forgot for a moment I was still holding you.”

“Comforting…” Logan crouched down and moved to set him back on the floor. “Um, actually!” Logan froze. “Before you put me back down…”

“What’s up, kiddo? Ya alright down there?” Patton crouched down in front of Logan.

“Uh… I’m hungry. That still feels weird to say…”

“Now that you mention it, I am too!”

They both stood back up and Logan held out the hand containing Virgil. “I will let the two of you go, then. I have yet to examine the samples I extracted from Virgil’s wound.”

“Oh!” Patton reached out awkwardly, then pulled his hand back before finally setting it flat against Logan’s and waited for Virgil to crawl over. “Ya alright?” Virgil nodded hesitantly — which wasn’t entirely true, but if he answered any other way Patton would just freak out. “Well, see you later. Thanks, Logan!”

“Of course.”

There was one more thing they’d discovered about this place — the cupboards and the fridge in the kitchen never depleted. They could eat as much as they wanted and nothing ever ran out, which was very useful. Once they got to the kitchen, the first thing they noticed was a snow white cat sitting on the kitchen counter directly opposite the door. At seeing them, it immediately started meowing loudly to get their attention. “Where’d you come from, little guy?” The cat batted at his hand, then turned, showing off the golden streak on it’s shoulder, before balancing on it’s back feet and holding a single paw above it’s head. Patton gasped. “Roman?!” The cat nodded firmly, then started pacing the counter, meowing angrily. “Okay, I get you’re upset, but there are worse things to be stuck as, right? I mean, Virgil’s just tiny.” He lowered his cupped hands so Roman could see the two inch Virgil resting in them, and they both stared at each other in shock until finally Roman snickered and flicked his head.

“Well you’re not exactly show ready either!”

“Guys!” Patton cupped his other hand around Virgil and spun him away. “Let’s try and remember we’re all friends here!” They both turned their heads away and Roman flicked his tail angrily. “Come on, guys! This is happening to all of us, let’s try to support and encourage each other!” Virgil sighed, and Roman decided being angry at Virgil was less important than freaking out about the fact the fact that he was a cat and continued to pace. “Um, well… we were just gonna find something to eat, but I’m sure Logan could try to help you turn back! He’s in the lab still. He actually just helped me get back to normal size! Isn’t that cool?!” Roman hung his head and hopped off the counter, then trudged out of the room. “Good luck!” He waited until Roman was gone, then turned and set Virgil on the counter. “Lucky. I wanna be a kitty too… Maybe next time!”

“Right… Lucky…”

“Whatcha want?”

Virgil shrugged. “I really don’t care, I just don’t want to be hungry. And nothing sweet.”

Patton slowly slid the box of cupcakes back to the back of the counter and moved to the fridge. “What about some of that rice stuff we had last night?”

He shrugged again. “Sure.”

Smiling, Patton got out the container and closed it in the microwave, then opened a cupboard for the dishes and gasped. “Oh my gosh, tiny bowl!” He took out the miniature dish with two fingers and grinned. “Do you see this?!”

“Yeah. I do. It’s the same one that’s been here the past three weeks. Same mini silverware too.”

Gasping, he pulled open the silverware drawer and squealed. “Tiny silverware!”

“Yeah. I know.”

“It’s so cuuute!”

“Uh-huh. The microwave’s done.”

It was, in fact, beeping, and Virgil jumped down into the drawer to retrieve his silverware as Patton took it out. But when he tried to climb back out, he realized… he was too short to reach the edge of the counter. His heart raced as his mind jumped to a million worse-case-scenarios, throwing images of himself getting trapped and starving to death, or growing while in the drawer, or worse yet getting caught in the rotating wheel at the end of the drawer’s groove and being crushed like he was pushed through a meat grinder! Or what if he tried to climb out on the side of the drawer and it closed on him and his top half got caught against the countertop but the bottom was still caught against in the drawer and… and… He took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, and let it out slowly. He wasn’t alone. Patton was here. But he would have to ask for his help. The thought made him shudder. Patton could be pretty clumsy sometimes, anything could go wrong! What if he dropped him?! Hands shaking, he took a deep breath and swallowed hard. “Virgil? Oh, hey! There ya are! What are ya doin’ in there, kiddo? Virgil?”

Virgil flinched out of his thoughts and looked up at him. “Uh…” He looked nervously down at himself, then up at the countertop. “Uh…” Why was it so hard to just say it?! Patton wouldn’t think any worse of him for asking for his help! Would he…? “I…”

“Oh, oh! You got stuck in there, huh?” Virgil breathed a sigh of relief. “You should’a just said somethin’!” Patton reached down a single finger and held it out to him like a step stool.

Shaking, Virgil climbed on, then jumped to the countertop. “Th-Thanks.”

“That’s what friends are for! Oh, duh!” He slid the tiny bowl over to him, then got up to find himself a chair.

Virgil watched him leave, then got up and stepped over to Patton’s bowl. Now that he had to eat, Patton had quickly gotten a terrible sweet tooth and almost couldn’t eat anything that wasn’t coated in sugar. He climbed a spare eraser Logan had left, then realized it wasn’t tall enough and turned it on end before climbing it again and peering into the giant bowl. He was genuinely surprised for a moment. He was actually… eating the same thing as Virgil. Nothing sweet about it at all. He was trying to climb back down when the eraser tipped back over on it’s side and in an attempt to try and stay standing, Virgil rammed his thighs into the edge of the bowl and was sent tumbling head first into the bowl. Before he could even sit up properly, he heard Patton set down his chair and froze. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no, oh no! He would see him, right? He was suddenly having an incredibly difficult time breathing. Right?! Virgil scrambled at the side of the bowl desperately, only to slip and tumble further into the bowl. Oh, no. He saw a ginormous silver spoon dig into the rice under him and fell on his back, beginning to hyperventilate. He stared up at the huge face, barely able to breath, and tears ran down his face as Patton started opening his mouth. He tried, and failed, and tried, and failed again, and finally he was able to muster out some sort of half-word just before the spoon passed his lips. “P-P-P-PATTON!”

Clang! The spoon went clattering to the counter and Patton shrieked and shot his hands to his mouth. “VIRGIL?!” Virgil landed roughly on the countertop, then rolled and slammed into Patton’s bowl, where he immediately collapsed and started sobbing. “Are you okay?!” Patton had both hands over his mouth, and tears were beginning to form in his eyes. “Oh my gosh, Virgil! I-I’m so sorry! I-I - I h-had no idea! I’m so sorry, Virgil! Are you okay?! Virgil?!” He carefully slid his bowl to the side so he could see him and noticed he was breathing heavy and rapidly — not hyperventilating now, but close. “Oh, Virgil! I-I’m so sorry!” He finally uncovered his mouth again to wipe the rest of his face dry, but he couldn’t stop crying. “I’m really, really sorry! Virgil? Can you hear me? Are y-you hurt anywhere?” Virgil turned to lay on his back and shook his head in answer, and Patton let out a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness!” He sniffled. “I thought - I thought-! You-!” He hiccuped, then sniffled, then hiccuped again. “I’m so sorry!”

“What on earth is going on here?!” Patton looked over and there, standing in the doorway, cat-Roman sitting beside him, was Logan.

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fuckyeahalexjo · 5 years

Note

Could you please write something about Alex visiting the jo while she’s hospitalized? I miss the show but I think I miss your writing more!

Alex took a deep breath as the buzzing sound indicated he had been granted access through the final barrier to the locked ward. He hesitated before taking a step forward, a million thoughts racing through his mind. Looking side to side unsure of where he should go next, he rubbed his sweaty palms against his jeans, hoping he looked calmer than he felt. No matter how many times he had been placed in this position, it never got any easier. A moment later, a staff member came and ushered him along with the others present for visiting hours into a common area. Alex stood back, unsure of what to do and watched as the others scattered about the room, sliding into white plastic chairs surrounding matching white plastic tables, leaving enough space between them to allow for conversations to remain somewhat private.

He made his way to the far wall and slid into a seat where he could observe the whole room and, more importantly, watch for Jo to arrive. He leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees and tried to relax as much as possible, the fear he would say or do the wrong thing already starting to overwhelm him. He wasn’t even sure if she would be excited to see him. Would she even want to see him at all? Would it set her back? As the minutes ticked by, he leaned back and rubbed his face, wondering how time seemed to go even slower the closer he got to seeing Jo.

The sound of the door opening to the common area made him sit up straighter, his eyes scanning the handful of patients for Jo and becoming anxious when she did not come in. He sighed, almost feeling foolish, that he had come too soon, deciding she must not have made any progress yet and was unable to get out of the bed to visit. The thought worried him more, causing him to rub his hands across his knees. He was about to get up to ask a staff member about her when the door opened again, and she appeared tentatively. Alex rose slowly, willing himself not to run to her and wrap her in his arms. Jo gave a shy smile as she made her way through the tables towards him, her eyes never leaving his. Despite the faded jogging capris and oversized sweatshirt she wore without a stitch of makeup and her hair in a messy bun, she still looked incredibly gorgeous to him. She stopped and stared at him for a moment before reaching up to rub his face, “I’m gone for all of forty-eight hours and you go and lose your razor?”

Alex bowed his head slightly and gave a faint chuckle before reaching up and cupping her hand to bring it to his mouth to kiss her palm, deciding to completely ignore the staff’s suggestion regarding limiting physical contact during the visit, “God I’ve missed you.”

She smiled softly at him as she sat down, “Sorry I’m late, I was in with the therapist and it went a little long.”

“That’s a good thing, right?” his voice much higher than he had wanted, but he couldn’t help the immediate feeling of hope that sentence caused to rush over him.

Nodding with an easy smile, she agreed, “A really good thing. I’m surprised how much we’ve covered so far. And she…she has crazy insight into what’s going on inside my head.” Jo reached forward and tugged on the insulated vest he wore, “What’s this about?”

“Webber took me fishing, don’t change the subject. I wanna hear what’s been going on with you.”

Jo looked at him, her eyebrows cocked in contemplation, “Fishing? You went fishing?”

“He offered and I had some time off,” Alex gave with a weak shrug, hoping she wouldn’t read anything troubling into it. The last thing he wanted to do was cause her more anxiety.

“Jackson put him up to it?”

Alex couldn’t help but chuckle, “Maybe. It was nice though. If you want to go, I’m sure he’ll take us both.”

Jo’s lips turned up slightly as she gave a breath of laughter, “I’m starting to wonder if you should be in here too.” He wagged his eyebrows suggestively, causing her to roll her eyes and push on his shoulder lightly.

Alex reveled in her smile, feeling more at ease since she made the decision to leave for Pittsburg, “You really do seem to be doing well. It’s great to see you smile.”

Jo immediately sobered up, “You know I’m not better, right?”

Alex made sure to catch her gaze, “You’re not well, I know that. But you are better. I can see it. I don’t know if you can yet, but I know you. And you’re….you’re making progress. Quick progress. It’s not just me that thinks so, the team here thinks so too.” Jo bit her lip and looked away, causing Alex to lower his voice and lean in closer, “And I don’t think I’ve ever been more proud of you.”

Jo’s looked up as her eyes quickly filled with tears, “I can’t tell you how good it is to see you. I’ve missed you so much.” They sat for a moment, just holding hands and allowing the silence to comfort them both. When it seemed like her tears were coming faster, Alex reached down and rubbed her thigh comfortingly, focusing on the motion to try to keep himself from getting upset at her tears. He willed himself to be strong for her, he could always break down later in the car or after he made it back home. “Did they give you my rings and watch?”

“Yeah,” he gave as he cleared his throat. “I got them before I went home the day you were admitted. They’re on your bedside table waiting for you.”

“I know why they don’t want us keeping things like that. Liability and blah, blah, blah. But I think not having a watch makes the time go slower and I really miss my wedding set. I don’t think I realized how much I fiddle with it until it wasn’t on my finger anymore.”

“Here,” Alex offered as he started to take off his watch, “Just keep mine, it’s worthless so who cares if someone steals it. I don’t think my ring will fit though, but I can bring one of your others from home if you like…if you tell me which one to bring.”

“Alex, I can’t, you need your watch,” she protested weakly as he placed the band on her wrist and adjusted it to the smallest option available. “I’ll be okay.”

He smiled as his fingers lingered on her soft skin, “Trust me, you need it more than I do. Besides, I can stop at a dollar store on my way home and get another one.” He leaned back again, not wanting to cause staff to have a bad impression of him on his first official visit to the unit, but he couldn’t stop himself from touching her. “It will make me feel better knowing you have it.”

“Thank you,” she whispered as she bit her lip and looked away, her fingers now fidgeting with the watchband that was still much too large for her tiny wrist.

Alex watched her anxiously as her mood changed, “You okay?”

Jo quickly turned back at him, her eyes wide, “It’s just….” She lifted her wrist in the air, “This just makes me think of something the therapist said to me in both sessions.”

He waited for a minute for her to continue before jutting his face forward and widening his eyes in question, “Which was?”

She smiled briefly before looking at her shoes then back up at him, “She seems to think the reason this whole thing with my mother and the rape and all of it…the reason it all hit me so hard is because of you.” Alex sat back quickly, not prepared for that statement from her. He nodded slowly as he willed himself not to react further. “Oh shit, that came out wrong, that’s not how I should have said it….It’s not your fault. I would never ever think that, cause you did everything you could and I…”

“Jo, Jo, Jo…just take a breath and try again,” he waited until she looked up to meet his eyes before nodding encouragingly, “It’s okay, Jo.”

After a long pause with Jo picking at her fingers and his watchband, she looked up. “My therapist, Kristine, we’ve been talking about why this rattled me so. I mean, of all the crap I’ve had dealt to me over my entire lifespan, why did this break me and send me into a spiral. And part we both think is because of the magnitude of what I learned and the weight of that on anyone, but on the other hand, I’ve had a lifetime of shitty things…I mean, I’m used to bad stuff. So that can’t be all.”

Alex sat silently, nodding at times as she tried to piece things together. He tried to make his voice as soft and encouraging as he could, “So what else have you come up with?”

Jo looked up to meet his eyes, “Well, for starters, my number one coping mechanism was taken away from me last year.”

Alex’s eyebrows furrowed in thought as he tried to follow her, “Which was?”

“Running. I’ve always just ran.” She gave a small half grin at his dumbfounded expression, “And now I can’t. I could never run from you so I’m stuck having to actually deal with my crap. And that’s brand new to me. Before I would just pick up and leave and start a new life. That’s what foster care taught me and I just carried that into adulthood. Whenever times got hard, I took off.”

When the silence stretched into unease, Alex ventured softly, “Not to be an ass and minimize what’s happened before….but I’m glad you ran to me.” Jo’s tearful eyes met his as he pressed on, “And I’m glad you’re hanging around to deal with this. It was bound to catch up with you eventually.”

She nodded her head quickly and reached up to wipe her eyes as she looked out the window, “Kristine also thinks now that I know what unconditional love is supposed to look like, it makes it harder to accept rejection. That you’ve made it impossible for me to just be hardened by people that can’t love and accept me like I’ve been able to do in the past.”

Alex’s eyes widened as he took in all she was saying, and started feeling overwhelmed. “I think Kristine is giving me too much credit,” he said with as much levity as he could muster, suddenly wanting to lighten the mood.

Jo looked back at him, giving an expression he couldn’t quite read. She stared at him for a while before giving softly, “I don’t.”

The sound of a staff member opening the door to indicate visiting hours were over caused both to glance up quickly, both instantly filling with regret that they had to say goodbye. Jo stood first and wrapped Alex in a hug before he had stood up all the way. She kissed his cheek quickly and whispered, “Thank you for coming.”

Alex hugged her tightly, rubbing his hands along her back, “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

Jo pulled back and studied him with a mischievous grin, her eyes still glistening with unshed tears, “Now who sounds crazy?”

He chose to ignore her, knowing she was feeling anxious about him leaving, “I’ll be back tomorrow, okay?”

She nodded and turned to quickly walk out, leaving him feeling more alone than ever.

#jolex #fanfiction #alex karev #jo wilson #grey's anatomy #ask #anonymous

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nerdypinupcrystal · 5 years

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Every Breath You Take Chapter 9: Girls Night

I’m BAAAAACK! I’m so sorry for taking forever to update, guys. I had so much going on; school and work back to back, I seriously get no days off! My aunt was in the hospital for a month, but she’s okay now. And I was also hit with the dreaded writers block. But I’m finally here with a new chapter, it’s a fun lengthy one, I hope you guys enjoy it!

Masterlist

Chapter 9: Girls Night

After our talk in Matt’s apartment, he walked me back to my place to rest, obviously noticing how drained the talk left me. With one more lingering, spine tingling kiss, he walked back to his apartment with the promise to see me later.

I called Lucy to invite her to have a sleepover with me. This day of honesty has encouraged me to want to open up to my new “best friend” as Lucy fondly titled herself.

I slept the day away until a knock on the door woke me up. I reached for my phone to check the time. My eyes widened with disbelief at reading the large bright numbers on the screen. 6:15 PM

Holy shit that talk really did drain me!

The knocking continued until I heard a familiar voice through the door.

“Iris, open up! The strippers are getting restless!” Lucy yelled impatiently.

I let out a snort of laughter as I made my way towards the door, opening it to reveal my quirky best friend wearing a yellow dress and carrying a green stuffed animal with little tentacles in its face.

“Good evening, Miss. Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior Cthulhu?” Lucy asked, sounding every bit like a missionary.

“I was under the impression you brought strippers with you.” I replied, arching one brow up as I patiently waited for her response.

“They got impatient and went back to Chippendales. Now you get Cthulhu.” She responded as she thrust the green stuffed Cthulhu doll into my hands. “He like praises, occasional human sacrifices, and cuddles.”

I giggled as I held the stuffed monster like a baby. “Thank you, I’ll do my best.” I opened the door wider for her, “You may enter if you dare.”

“Thank you, kind gentlewoman.” Lucy replied with a curtsy. She stepped inside carrying a medium sized overnight bag on her shoulder, but surprised me with the tall pink train case she rolled in behind her.

“Please don’t tell me you have luggage for Cthulhu.” I pleaded, my brows furrowed in slight worry.

Lucy was quick to respond. “Nope! I came prepared with some essentials.”

She unlocked each compartment of the large case and proceeded to open and separate the case. Each compartment, to my amazement, revealed an assortment of pastries and desserts from the bakery. The top compartment had a protective container filled with a variety of cupcakes; the second compartment held a wide selection of French macarons, truffles,and fruit tarts; and the third compartment held various cronuts, puff pastry treats, and dulce de leche cookies.

My eyes nearly bugged out of my head at all the sweets. “Holy shit, Luce! There’s no way we’re gonna finish all of this tonight!”

“Oh don’t be silly!” She replied as she started handing me the desserts to put in the fridge. “Some of this can be our breakfast too. Maybe you can even take some over to Matt.” Lucy wiggled her eyebrows at me with a smirk.

I blushed at the thought of Matt, my lips still tingling from our kiss this morning.

“And besides,” Lucy continued, interrupting my thoughts. “You haven’t seen the best part. Guaranteed to hype up that appetite.”

With that, she opened the bottom largest compartment. Revealing six bottles of Stella Rosa wine.

“Three for you, three for me!” Lucy exclaimed in excitement as she pulled out the bottles and set them on the counter.

“Holy shit.” I said, too speechless to say anything else. But then I realized to my dismay, “I don’t have a corkscrew.”

Lucy, being the ultimate problem solver replied. “No worries, I have one on my keychain.” She held up said keychain in all its pink bedazzled glory.

“Always prepared.” I spoke with admiration.

“Never know when you’re gonna need it. My sister and I learned that in Girl Scouts.” Lucy replied as she uncorked one of the bottles.

My eyebrows raised in surprise, “They taught you about corkscrews?”

“My mom was our scout leader, she insisted. But enough about that,” She thrust the open bottle to my hands as she opened a second bottle. “Let’s drink.”

“Shouldn’t we get some wine glasses?” I asked perplexed.

Lucy scoffed. “Sweetie, please. We’re ladies. We drink straight from the bottle.” I let out a laugh as I put the rest of the bottles in the fridge to chill. “Now let’s sit down, drink up, and talk about what’s going on with you.”

We got to the couch, I took a healthy gulp of the wine and told her everything.

She took it pretty well.

“I’m gonna fuckin kill him.” Lucy growled as we both wiped our tears. “I’m gonna fly out to Miami, and kill him to death!”

I let out a snort of laughter. “How do you kill someone to death?”

“Oh there are ways.” Lucy was quick to reply. “I can get quite creative when the inspiration hits me.”

“I don’t doubt that for a second,” I chuckled. “But I just got away from him and I hate the idea of you being in the same room as him. What he did to me was horrible enough. The thought of him doing anything to you or anyone else I care about terrifies me.” I felt a chill of fear go up my spine just saying it.

Lucy frowned in sympathy and pulled me into a comforting embrace. “Hey now, get that thought out of your mind. He’s thousands of miles away back in Miami. We’re in New York. You changed your look, it’s a huge city, and he thinks you’re dead. And most importantly, you’re not alone anymore. You have me, and two adorable kick ass lawyers that will fight for you. Especially Matt.” Lucy finished with a wink.

My cheeks reddened at the thought of my sweet, gorgeous neighbor. “That’s a pretty valid point.”

“Does he know?” Lucy asked.

I nodded. “Yeah, I told him this morning before I called you.”

“How did he take it?”

I hesitated before I answered. “Better than I thought. At first, though, he was silent. I guess he was processing everything, but I was so sure he hated me.” Lucy looked confused before I elaborated. “For lying. For running away from my problems like a coward.”

“Oh sweetie, you’re not a coward!” Lucy exclaimed, her eyes meeting mine. “You were being abused, you were alone and scared! You said yourself that cops couldn’t help you. It would’ve gotten even worse the longer you stayed. You did what you had to do, and on top of that, you snuck out to move your mom and faked her death to protect her even though you knew that you were gonna get hurt for disappearing like that. That took a lot of guts, you must know that by now.”

I nodded shakily, fighting the tears threatening to shed. “I do now. Matt said as much himself.”

Lucy’s face brightened. “See? That man is as smart as he is gorgeous...”

“And kissable.” I muttered as I took a sip of my wine.

Lucy continued, “Just like my Foggy- time the fuck out!”

My eyes widened at the sudden outburst. “What?”

“You kissed Matt?!” She asked excitedly.

“Oh, yeah, I did.” I replied with a timid smile, my cheeks flushing into a rosy pink.

Lucy could barely contain her composure, her hands were flailing and her body jumping from excitement. She shot up off the couch and rushed to the fridge, returning with the container of cupcakes before going back to the fridge to grab two more bottles of wine. She gingerly sat back on the couch, her legs folded like a kid eager for story time.

“Okay, I’m ready! Tell me everything.” She begged with glee.

Exasperated, I shook my head and replied. “Luce, there isn’t that much to tell. It wasn’t hot and heavy, it was sweet and tender during a vulnerable moment.”

“You say there isn’t much to tell, but I don’t care. Tell me about it anyway!” Lucy exclaimed impatiently. “Finish your first bottle and we can share all the dirty fantasies about our guys.” Her eyebrows wiggled suggestively as she nudged my open bottle towards me.

“Luce!” I laughed out. “I don’t really talk about this kind of stuff.”

“Oh you will,” Lucy stated. “Now sip sip.”

30 minutes, one and a half bottles of wine later….

“Matt’s so fuckin beautiful, it’s unfair!” I cried out dramatically, fully feeling the effects of the sweet wine. Lucy giggling like a drunk hyena as I continued.

“Like, he’s so sweet and precious with that smile made of sunshine, but he’s also sexy as fuck with that body- oh God, that body! I’ve bumped into him like a billion times, he even caught me in his arms once, and sweet baby Jesus that man is pure muscle! I wanna play with it like a jungle gym. Like every time I look at him...I feel it in my bones,” My eyes welled up with drunk tears, “I know his dick is big, I know it! I know it’s big! Oh God, my heart hurts!”

I was full on sobbing as I bit into my fifth or tenth cupcake.

Lucy was no better off than I was. She was on the brink of tears as she hugged me sympathetically. “My poor, sweet, thirsty flower child needs to get Murdocked so bad.”

“I really do!” I replied as I wiped my tears. “I’ve never had an orgasm and I really really wanna know what one feels like before I die of old age or something.”

“You what?!” Lucy exclaimed with and inhuman sounding gasp of breath. “How have you never had an orgasm?!”

I rolled my eyes and took a huge gulp of wine. “I was a virgin when I met Paul. He insisted we wait until after the wedding to make it more ‘special’. And the whole time during our honeymoon, it was uncomfortable and kinda hurt like hell, but he was a little gentle with me.” My mood began to dampen as I went on, “When he showed his true colors, he stopped being gentle. He took what he wanted and I just laid there and let him. It was better if I didn’t fight.”

I took another gulp of wine as Lucy processed everything. “Could he be any more of an asshole?!” She yelled in disgust. “If he has to be so controlling that he doesn’t care whether or not you cum, then he’s probably shit in bed anyway.”

I nodded in agreement, “That actually makes so much sense. He’s…..” I hesitated for a second.

Come on, girl. Say what you want about him. He’s not here to stop you.

I stood up on the couch, holding my bottle up high and proudly cried out, “Paul Burney is a fuckin asshole! I hate him with every inch of my body, and I deserve a better man that will give me all the love and orgasms I want!”

“Fuckin A, babydoll!” Lucy cheered as she clumsily stood up on the couch alongside me, holding her own bottle up high as she pledged, “Love and orgasms for us! A lifetime of STDs and...um...unlubed anal for Paul!”

I laughed so hard, I couldn’t control the sudden spray of wine from my mouth. I collapsed onto the couch, struggling to breathe through my drunken laughter.

“What the fuck?” I managed to ask.

Lucy hopped off the couch to sit back down. “It’ll be my birthday present to you.”

“My birthday isn’t until October.” I replied.

Lucy’s eyes widened in excitement. “Ooh only two months away then! What day? I wanna start planning now.”

I snorted in amusement as I replied. “The 31st. “

Lucy looked almost ready to have a heart attack. “NO WAY!!! Your birthday is on Halloween?!” She waved her hands ecstatically. “Halloween is my Christmas! And you get to have it for your birthday! That’s so cool!! It must’ve been so fun celebrating it.”

My smile dimmed. “It was when I was with my mom. When I got married, I didn’t get to celebrate either holiday anymore. Paul doesn’t like celebrating holidays, especially Halloween. He finds them childish.”

I looked down at my feet in shame, hating myself for letting him control me for so long. Lucy’s smile dropped; her face turned red, either from anger or the wine, or possibly both. She shook her head in disgust, relaxing her face back into a smile.

“Well he’s not here, and this is a new start for you, right?” I nodded for her to continue. “So it’s decided. I’m throwing you the spookiest, most epic Halloween birthday party ever! Costumes, Halloween themed birthday cake, booze, candy, the works! What do you say, birthday ghoul?”

Lucy wasn’t prepared for me to pounce onto her into an attack hug, she let out a yelp as the impact caused us to fall off the couch and onto the floor. She giggled hysterically as I peppered her face with drunken kisses.

“I take that as a yes?” She asked with excitement.

“Can we make jack-o-lanterns?” I asked, my eyes widened with childlike glee.

“Are you kidding? That’s gonna be the first thing we do, of course we can make them!” Lucy replied happily. “We’ll have a day at the pumpkin patch, ooh and I’m sure there’s a corn maze out there too. This is gonna be so much fun!” She clapped with excitement.

I was too drunk to keep any ounce of composure, l squealed and kicked my feet in the air like I just didn’t care. Then a thought occurred to me.

“Do you think Matt and Foggy would wanna join us? Would they even be into that sort of thing?” I asked, starting to feel a smidge of doubt.

Lucy gave my hair a gentle tug. “If they’re as into us as I’m pretty positive they are, then they’ll totally wanna join in. You can find out when you see Matt tomorrow.” She replied with a wink. “Besides, you pretty much have to be a soulless asshole to not wanna celebrate Halloween- let alone someone’s birthday!”

“Well, that explains Paul.”

Lucy scoffed. “Fuck that dumpster fire of a human being with something hard and sandpapery.”

I let out a snort of laughter, “Oh Luce, you have such a way with words.”

Lucy grinned with pride. “It’s a talent. However speaking of assholes…”

I caught her finger before it had the chance to poke at my bruised cheek.

“Who’s the asshole that hurt your cheek? What the Hell happened? Tell me everything!”

My clouded brain didn’t understand what she was talking about, until a certain sexy vigilante in black pajamas flashed through my mind.

“Oh my god, I totally forgot about that!” I exclaimed. “I had a crazy night last night.”

“Well don’t leave me in suspense, Woman! What happened???” Lucy asked impatiently.

I sat up before I started my tale of the night before. “So, I didn’t go home after seeing you. I needed to go somewhere to breathe. And while I was out, I made some new friends. Like this nurse who I ended up spilling my guts to about my situation, and she gave me a checkup. Her name’s Claire, very cool chick, she gets a free treat from the bakery, I can’t wait for you to meet her. Oh and I met this super cool group of musicians and jammed with them at Guitar Center, they’re my own band of gypsies, you’ll love them!” Focus, girl. “Anywho, I was walking home and it was dark. Then this dirty creepy guy dragged me down an alley. My dumb ass thought it was Paul, but nope, I was just being mugged. I tried to get away, but he threw me against the wall, which caused this,” I gestured to the bruised scrape in my cheek. “He started groping me and wanted to do other stuff to me,” I shivered at the memory. “But then, out of nowhere, this guy shows up, throws the mugger off me, and beats the mad shit out of him!”

“No way!” Lucy exclaimed as she sat up facing me. “Who was it?! Ooh was it one of the Avengers?”

I shrugged, “I don’t think so. Do any of the Avengers dress in head to toe black and fight like some kind of sexy acrobatic ninja?”

Lucy let out a dramatic gasp. “Oh my god, you lucky bitch! You got rescued by Daredevil!”

“Who?” I asked, not familiar with the name.

“Oh that’s right, you haven’t lived here long enough to be familiar with him. He’s our local vigilante, also known as the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. He’s been around for about a year now, I think, trying to clean the streets of criminals and scumbags with some epic ass kicking from what I’ve heard. And you got rescued by him!” Lucy finished excitedly.

I sat there in disbelief. I couldn’t believe that not only did someone care enough to save my life, but that it was by an apparently famous crime fighter.

“What happened after that?” Lucy asked. “Did he talk to you? Or did he disappear mysteriously into the night?” She finished with a dramatic whisper.

I blushed as I remembered how close and intimate my moment with the masked man felt.

“He spoke to me…” I trailed off.

“And????” Lucy asked impatiently.

She wasn’t going to let it go until I told her, so I let out a sigh and continued. “He asked me if I was okay. He got really close to me, he touched my cheek…” I felt my heart race remembering his touch. “It felt so intimate. Like he really genuinely cared about me. Like he wanted to hold me, you know?” Lucy dreamily nodded as I continued. “He told me to go home and be safe. I thanked him, and then he was gone.”

Lucy sighed. “That sounds so romantic. Having your own superhero to keep you safe. What a dream!”

I couldn’t help but agree. “He certainly got my heart racing, that’s for sure.”

“I heard he has a killer body under those black pajamas.” Lucy pointed out. “How did it look? And most importantly, did you check out his ass?” She asked, causing me to almost choke on my wine.

“Oh my god, Luce, warn a girl next time!” She simply shrugged. “And seriously? I was in danger. I saw him beat up that creep who wanted to hurt me!”

Lucy’s excitement deflated , “You’re right, I’m sorry-”

“Of course I checked out his ass!” I cut her off. “I’m not stupid! If my life was about to end, I needed something good to look at.”

Lucy let out an excited giggle. “And how was it?”

“Round and juicy, like a perfect peach. If I were to rate it, I’d give it two palms up.” I replied, holding my hands palm side up with a grabbing motion; causing Lucy and I to burst into hysterical laughter.

“You’ll have to get a good grip on that peach the next time you see him.” Lucy wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

I snorted, “Groping a vigilante? Oh yeah, I see that working out well. He’ll probably have me arrested!”

Lucy shrugged, “You know a couple hot lawyers that’ll defend you.”

Matt.

The thought of him instantly sobered me up.

“Fuck, how could I have forgotten about Matt? I shouldn’t be thinking these things about some masked stranger! What’s wrong with me?” I asked, frustrated with myself.

Lucy seemed unfazed by my thoughts. “Don’t worry about that. He won’t mind.”

“What makes you say that?” I looked at her in slight confusion.

Lucy’s eyes widened as she took a huge gulp of wine. She hesitated for a second before replying. “Maybe...he’s into kinky shit and would be open to a sexy three way. Then you really would be the luckiest bitch in the world!”

I just barely swallowed my wine before cracking up. “I don’t think Matt and I are at that stage of our relationship to talk about that kind of stuff yet. We haven’t even really talked about what we are yet. And besides, I doubt he’s into threesomes and stuff like that anyway.”

Don’t act like the thought didn’t cross your mind. I shrugged at my thoughts.

“Hey, don’t rule it out,” Lucy insisted. “Just because he’s blind and catholic, doesn’t mean he’s not kinky as hell. In fact, he’s probably very adventurous indeed.” She finished with a wink.

I rolled my eyes and replied, “I’ll keep that in mind, you weirdo.”

“Dancing!” Lucy exclaimed out of nowhere, immediately changing the subject. “We have to have dancing at your party! Ooh the Time Warp is a must, remind me that we seriously need to go out for a Rocky Horror night, by the way. Ooh we can do the rockabilly stroll! That’ll be a fun and easy dance to do.”

“What’s the rockabilly stroll?” I asked once Luce stopped to take a breath.

She immediately jumped up and ran for her bag. She pulled out a portable speaker and her phone. A moment later, rockabilly music filled the air. Lucy grabbed my hands, yanking me to my feet.

“You’re gonna learn today.” She declared before my new dance lessons began.

The rest of the night was spent dancing, eating, drinking, and leaving all my troubles behind.

Next Morning

I woke up the next morning expecting a killer hangover despite Lucy making me take some aspirin and orange juice before passing out, but no such hangover occurred. I wanted to go back to sleep, sure, but thankfully there was no splitting headache from all that wine.

The smell of coffee brewing prevented me from falling back asleep. I slowly started to rise up from the scattered pillows and tangled blanket on the...floor?

I guess we were too tired or too hammered to make it to the bed.

“Rise and shine, Ginger!” Lucy called out from the kitchen.

I forced myself up and clumsily stumbled towards the kitchen. Lucy stood at the counter wide awake and perked full of energy.

“How are you so full of energy?” I groggily asked her.

“High metabolism and an iron liver. I get that from my mama.” Lucy replied with a cheeky grin. “How do you take your coffee, my sleepy ginger snap?”

“Sweeter than Matt’s smile.” I replied dreamily, still half asleep.

“What was that?” Lucy replied with a chuckle.

“More cream and sugar than coffee.” I clarified, blushing at the realization of what I said.

Lucy complied, handing me my fresh cup. “One sweet ass coffee for one thirsty ass lady.”

“Thanks, darling.” I replied, drinking the coffee. “So what time are we opening the bakery today?”

“Well I think we can get away with opening up shop a little later today. The boss is pretty lenient.” She winked. “So we can take our time getting more awake and ready for the day.”

“Sounds like a great plan.” I readily agreed. “I love my boss.”

“Love ya too, doll.” Lucy replied with a wink. “But first thing’s first.” She made her way to the fridge. “You’re gonna brush your teeth, get dressed, and take some goodies over to the handsome Mr. Murdock.”

“You don’t mind if I leave you behind for a few minutes?” I asked, not wanting to be rude to my friend.

Lucy put that worry to rest. “Don’t worry about me. I might take advantage of your shower if you don’t mind?”

“Knock yourself out. I’m just gonna freshen up real quick.” I replied as I raced to my room to change and brush my teeth as well as my birds nest-looking hair.

I was ready in no time; I rushed over to the kitchen where Lucy had just finished putting together a container full of pastries for me to take.

Lucy looked at me knowingly. “Wow, someone is eager to get Murdocked.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, you perv.” I replied innocently as I reached for the container. “Thanks for putting this together, Luce. I think I’ll bring him some coffee too. I think he’ll appreciate that.”

“Aww that’s so sweet!” Lucy gushed. She grabbed her overnight bag and pulled out a small stack of to-go coffee cups and lids. “Here, take one of these. Last thing we need is a coffee accident.”

“Thanks, Mary Poppins. You seem to carry everything!” I exclaimed.

Lucy scoffed. “Sweetie, Mary Poppins has nothing on me. Now go get your Murdock fix!” She started nudging me out the door. “I want details!” She finished with a slam of the door.

I shook my head with a giggle as I walked over next door. I could feel the butterflies in my stomach as I raised my hand to knock on Matt’s door.

The door opened after the first knock, revealing Matt, who was looking absolutely sinful in a black suit and tie. His beautiful eyes were already covered by those familiar red sunglasses.

“Morning, Matt!” I greeted cheerfully, feeling more awake in his presence.

“Good morning to you too, Iris.” He replied, flashing that gorgeous smile I love so much. “You sound better today.”

“I feel better today.” I replied, the memory of our kiss causing me to blush.

Matt opened the door wider. “Would you like to come in? I have to leave soon, but I can definitely spare a few minutes for you.” He finished with a wink, causing my organs to bounce.

I cleared my throat before I could get lost in my dirty thoughts.

“Why thank you, don’t mind if I do.” I replied with a slight curtsy before entering the apartment. Matt smirked as if he could see my gesture.

“How are you?” He asked as he closed the door, moving towards me. “I know yesterday had taken a lot out of you. Are you okay?”

He lifted his hand to my shoulder, giving me instant warmth at his thoughtfulness.

“I am.” I replied with a smile. “For the first time in a long time, I really am.” I leaned up to kiss those sweet lips of his, which he eagerly and gently gave back in kind. “Thank you for listening. And for accepting me and the truth.”

Matt smiled as he caressed my cheek. “Anytime. Thank you for trusting me. I know it wasn’t easy.”

“It wasn’t.” I agreed. “But it feels better to not have to keep this to myself anymore. I even called Lucy over to tell her.”

I looked down at the goodies in my hands and remembered the initial reason I was there.

“And speaking of which, she brought over practically half the treats from the bakery, and I thought you might like some for breakfast. You can maybe share some with Foggy if you want.” I gently nudged the container into his hands.

Matt’s smile was priceless. “Thank you so much, Iris. That’s so thoughtful of you. Foggy will appreciate this for sure.” He then sniffed the air. “Is that coffee I smell?”

“Yup!” I replied, carefully placing the hot cup in his hands. “I thought you could use a pick-me-up.”

“Wow, thank you! You’re a goddess.” He sighed appreciatively as he smelled the coffee.

I blushed at the comment, “It’s no problem. I don’t remember how you take your coffee, so I left it black.”

“I actually do take it black, so you did perfectly.” He praised. He took a sip, letting out a soft moan, giving me goosebumps. “Thank you so much, you saved me from having to make some myself.”

“Anytime.” I replied. “I’m happy to help.”

Matt smiled back; he was about to speak, but he was cut off by a robotic voice calling out “Foggy. Foggy. Foggy.”

Letting out a huff he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “I’m sorry, Iris, can you give me just a second?”

“Of course, go ahead.” I assured him as he answered the phone.

“Hey, Foggy.” Matt greeted.

I couldn’t hear what Foggy was saying, but from Matt’s expression, I would guess Foggy was getting impatient.

“I know, I’m sorry I’m running late. I overslept.” He explained. “I’ll be there as soon as I can.” He tightened his grip on the container of pastries in his hand. He continued with a smirk, “And I’m even bringing breakfast. Courtesy of our favorite ladies.”

I felt my face flush even redder at the comment. Matt had to have known how he was affecting me, his smirk grew with a chuckle. Either at me or at what Foggy was saying, I have no idea.

“Okay. I’ll be there soon.” He finished before hanging up.

“I take it this is your cue to go?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

Matt nodded apologetically. “Yeah. I’d rather stay, to be honest, but we’re meeting a client today, and we have to prepare for that.”

I immediately felt guilty. “Oh god, Matt, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you late.”

Matt tilted my chin up to look at him. “Hey, don’t ever apologize for coming by. You’re a very welcome distraction.”

Our noses touched oh so softly, only a breath between our lips. My heart pounded in my ears, I think even Matt could hear it.

This man will be the death of me. But what a way to go.

The logical part of me should back away before we get carried away. But the aroused part of me wanted to keep going.

I gave in and eagerly pressed my lips against his, feeling lighter than air. I could feel Matt’s hand lightly grasp the back of my neck, his fingers combed through my hair as he held me closer to him. My hands clawed at his back, trying to get him even closer.

I felt the tip of Matt’s tongue at the seam of my lips, begging for entry. I let out an eager gasp in response, I softly began to greet his tongue with mine….

“Foggy. Foggy. Foggy. Fog-”

Letting out a groan of frustration, Matt broke apart from our kiss and answered the phone while still holding me close to him.

“What, Foggy?” Matt asked through clenched teeth.

The deep growl sent thrilling chills up my spine. Why does it sound so familiar?

“I knew it!” Foggy yelled on the other end, which I could hear loud and clear this time. “Get your tongue out of Iris’s throat, and get your ass over here!”

Foggy hung up before Matt could even respond.

We both let out a sigh of disappointment, Matt leaning his forehead against mine.

“I guess you really have to go this time, huh?” I asked dejectedly.

“I don’t want to, but he’ll hunt me down if I don’t.” He replied with a half hearted chuckle. “May I walk you back to your door?”

I giggled back, “Of course. Don’t forget the container. You’re gonna need those pastries to calm him down.”

Matt chuckled again, “You might be right about that. Though I think we’ll have to stop by the bakery so he can see Lucy in order for him to forgive me.”

“That can be arranged.” I replied as we made our way out the door.

He locked the door just as I noticed something was missing. “Oh Matt, you forgot your coffee.”

He turned to me with a smirk. “It’s okay. I already had my pick-me-up.”

Damn he’s smooth.

“You’re incorrigible.” I responded, flushing as red as a tomato.

“And you’re irresistible.” Matt replied with a wink as he held my hand.

“And you’re running late.” I replied back, trying to control my racing heart.

Our short walk ended as we stopped in front of my door, our hands still clasped together.

“You’re right,” He said, sounding disappointed once again about leaving. “Thank you for stopping by. It really made my morning.”

I grinned. “Anytime.” Then I decided to continue my bold streak. “In fact, would you like to come over for dinner tonight? We could whip something up in the kitchen together, it’ll be fun.”

I felt unreasonably nervous waiting for his answer.

You just soft core made out with the man in his apartment. I don’t think he’s gonna say “no”.

Matt smiled sweetly and replied, “I’d love to. What time should I come over?”

“How about 6:00?” I asked. Lucy won’t mind letting me off before then.

“Perfect.” He replied. “Want me to bring anything?”

“Just yourself.” I said, not wanting to let go of his hand. “Are you craving for anything in particular?”

I know what I’m craving for.

Matt smirked as if he heard my thoughts and replied, “How about we bake some dessert for dinner?” His calloused fingers lightly caressed my hand. “I’m suddenly craving for something sweet.”

I suddenly felt hot enough to break a sweat, and my rapidly beating heart certainly didn’t help. Keep it together.

“Okay,” Why did I sound so breathless? I cleared my throat before continuing. “I’ll think of something for us to make. I’ll see you tonight?”

“Looking forward to it.” He said as he leaned down to leave a soft, lingering kiss on my lips. “See you tonight.”

“Bye.” I whispered, biting my lip to try to hold back my bashful grin.

I could faintly hear Lucy’s footsteps shuffling quickly away from the other side of the door. Matt had an amused grin on his face as he turned away and walked towards the elevator.

I drifted through the doorway of my apartment like I was floating on a cloud. Even Lucy’s knowing smirk couldn’t distract me from the excitement tonight will surely bring.

------------------------------------------------------

A/N: And that was chapter 9!!! I hope it was worth the wait and that you loved the bonding between Iris and Lucy. I love them so much! And Matt...*sigh* he makes my heart sing! I hope y’all liked it, please be sure to follow me, reblog and leave a comment telling me what you think. Your comments truly make my day! Well that’s all for now and I’ll do my best not to take forever on the next chapter. Until next time...*kiss noise*

@jobean12-blog @cametobuyplums @tomhollandeu @writeyourmindaway @annavega333 @lullabylike @persephone-of-tartaros @emilymarie0422 @andrasta14

#Every Breath You Take #Daredevil #daredevil fanfiction #Matt Murdock #matt murdock x iris #matt murdock x oc #matt murdock x reader #daredevil au

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99centthoughts · 5 years

Note

i keep reading 'orion' as 'onion' so thats. who they are to me now

ONION……………………….. now im picturing orion as onion from steven universe and i am very stressed out by the thought

MORE ASKS UNDER THE CUT!!! (a lot of asks im sorry)

1) D..DONT DIE YET ANON……….. SOON!!! I have a break coming up and i wanna do more comics stuff 😭

2) LOL omg IM SORRY !!!! I Messed up the layout a couple of times while editing it so it must have been weird 😨

1) Hiya! Honestly I think it would be best to get comfortable with more realistic proportions before you branch out into cartoon/anime style! I did it the other way round and I regret it a lot, bc I think it made my foundations really shaky and inconsistent. THAT’S NOT TO SAY u have to master the traditional art style before u start drawing any cartoons though!! I think it’s fine to do them together, just don’t neglect traditional anatomy and all that, bc it will help you a lot in the future regardless of the style you eventually choose to stick to!

2) LKMKLDS ANON STOP NOW IM GOING TO THINK OF THE STORE WHENEVER I THINK OF JC ………… he would be Mr penney???? MR..PENNEY..

thank YOU for enjoying my drawings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ahhhh thank you so much for such a sweet message oh gosh ANON YOU’RE MAKING MY HEART GROW 3 SIZES!!! Messages like this make me want to share everything with everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M HONESTLY SO HAPPY that my silly little tips and stuff can make drawing fun for you BC THERE IS NOTHING BETTER THAN HAVING FUN WHILE DRAWING!!! MAY YOU INSPIRE LOTS AND LOTS OF PEOPLE and most importantly I hope you always find joy in your own art!!!! THIS MESSAGE MEANS THE WORLD TO ME AND YOU DO TOO ILU ANON!!! IM GONNA KEEP THIS FOREVER

1) A NERD AND A PUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2) omg I have thought about basically every combination o f my ocs at least once anon lKMDLskdlj they would be cute!!!!!!! and a very calm couple… I feel like emmett would be patient enough to handle fay though it would take a lot to get there bc rn emmett is low key terrified of fay LOL

1) IM NOT SURE U WOULD WANT TO MARRY THEM ¾ OF THEM ARE A MESS!!!!!!!

2) OH I googled around a bit bc tbh I have no idea what they are called too, and I think it’s called the terminator/ half tone?? it’s basically the bit of colour between the light and the core shadow (the darkest part of where the shadow starts)

THe coloured outline of shadows that alot of artists do is an exaggeration of how it looks in rl but it is pretty neat bc it makes the object look like it’s glowing haha

1) AW THANK YOU ANON!!!!!!!!! it’s so sweet that you’ve stuck around for so long and that you take the time to do that!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HOPE I’LL KEEP DRAWING AND MAKING ART THAT YOU ENJOY FOR YEARS TO COME!!!!

2) OH no that plant is a random plant that I made up hahhaaa

1) HELLO AGAIN AND thank you ahhh it means a lot to me that you take the time to interpret and think about my art in such a thoughtful manner😭😭😭 It’s really sweet and it makes me look at my art in a different way? I was thinking that the redrawn version seems more stiff and I wasn’t sure if I liked them more than the old ones, but after seeing this message I was like ohhh that is true I did try different things with the new versions and that is something I should appreciate and be proud of !! so thank YOU for the lovely words, it is my absolute pleasure to share my art with u!!

2) HE IS YOURS PLEASE TAKE CARE OF THIS WHIRLWIND

1) I like using poses from magazines to study anatomy!! I either follow blogs that post magazine scans or I buy them myself when i can! Another thing I’ve found rly helpful was using fitness books/ videos as references… like those for muscle-building/ weight lifters, where there are diagrams of which muscles are working for a specific exercise. YOUTUBE has a lot of fitness videos, just type xxx workout, pause the video at any random frame, and u should be able to get a nice reference to study muscles with!! If u want references for the muscles themselves, some good books I’ve found helpful are: Strength training Anatomy and Anatomy for sculptors (I can give them to you off anon if you’d like)!

2) I HOPE YOU ARE enjoying the brushes !!! NO WORRIES AT ALL I’m happy to share my brushes with anyone who might want to try using htem!! SENDS YOU ALL OF MY LOVE BACK I HOPE YOU ARE ALWAYS HAPPY AND INSPIRED ❤❤

1) omg this is so hard bc there are 213213 options and I could picture them as more than 1 type of fantasy creature tbh ……… BUT FIRST ONES THAT COME TO MIND WOULD BE : some kind faerie for fay haha, werewolf for tyler, centaur for emmett, vampire for jc, some kinda elemental spirit for cyrus, an orc for wade, and UHH some kind of wise gate guarding creature for parisi LOL

ILY TOO AND thank YOU for loving my silly boys!!!!!!!!!

2) AHHHH thank u anon I WISH YOU ALL tHE BEST AND I HOPE YOU KEEP DRAWING AS WELL ALWAYS 💞💞💞💞

1) OR PERHAPS PARISI IS JUST ENORMOUS but also yes it’s true baby tyler is a tiny baby bean

2) LSKMDLKSM HOW CAN I NOT SAY I LOVE YOU BACK TO YOU THE SWEETEST ANON OF ALL TIME 💖💖💖💖💖

1) omg anon this is a lie I am terrible at drawing anything symmetrically and if I somehow produced anything to make u think so, it’s probably because I spent 10 hours on getting it to look ok LOL I.. TRY TO USE GUIDELINES and flip my canvas to check that things are balanced… that helps me out a lot :’D

2) thank u anon for this ask it is beautiful and I will frame it and keep it in my room to encourage myself to start drawing batfam art again

1) HEY ANON and thank u! I have a list of resources that I’ve found helpful here (at the bottom of the page) !! I hope some of that might be useful for you and feel free to drop me another msg if u need more/ want something more specific!!!!!!! ALL THE BEST

2) omg I havent replied to asks in so long that I didnt even rmb what picture this was referring to and I had to go back and look LOL HE’S TRYING HIS BEST ANON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE CANT HELP BEING AN AVERAGE MAN SURROUNDED BY MODELS HOW RIDICULOUS OF THEM !!!!

#thank u for ur patience i will try to be better with replying ..#ILU ALL #sometimes i wish i knew who theese anons are so that i can befriend them #kelno #Anonymous

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im-a-goner-foryou · 5 years

Text

Idk I just want inexperienced! Peter having no idea how to masturbate, and he's so sexually frustrated that he resorts to calling his family doctor and pleading with the astounded man for some advice on how to get off. Having always encouraged the young patient that he should come forward if he encountered a problem of any sort, Tony can't exactly refuse; and sue him, but he's always had a particularly soft spot for the Parkers' son. So he agrees to guide the boy through it, beginning with the tentative instruction for him to "most importantly get comfortable, prop some pillows under your back..." and listening raptly to the shuffling on the other end, coupled by the sloppy sounds of Peter sucking noisily on his own fingers-- the kid not owning any lube and thus having no other option but to use his own spit.

And God help him, but Peter makes the most alluring sounds, muffled though they are falling from the speaker; heartbeat thrumming in his ears and phone clutched tightly in his hand, Tony listens on, utterly riveted, as the familiar stirrings to heat begin to coil tightly in his gut, a barely suppressed groan escaping against his will when Peter asks breathily, "w-what next Doctor Stark?"

So Tony describes in detail, trying-- and failing-- to remain professionally clinical in his gruffly uttered words for the boy to keep a rhythmic upstroke movement of his fist, to maintain a firm yet careful grip; Peter's incredibly receptive, squeaking out little affirmative noises every once in a while before falling quiet yet again save for the harshness of his breaths... and try as he might to give the kid as much privacy as possible, Tony can't help but imagine in his mind's eye the pretty little picture his patient's making right now, huddled on his small twin bed with a hand under his pajamas. Surely, Peter will be blushing the rosiest pink, rolling his hips upward to met the downward strokes of his hand and with those gangly legs kicking out at his sheets as he does so; perhaps even biting down on the corner of a pillow to muffle his cries from his aunt sleeping just next door.

"Oh, o-oh god, Doctor," the boy mewls from the other end, and Tony's eyes flutter shut from the effort it takes to gather whatever last shreds of his self-restraint. "It... it feels so good," he sighs, sweet voice laced with unmistakable pleasure; the man just barely manages a strangled sound in response. For a few moments he lies there in his own empty bed, tortured by the slick sounds of skin on skin and bitten-off moans and the vivid visual that comes along with them, then a pause-- when Peter speaks up again he sounds more wrecked than ever.

"Doctor Stark--" he says meekly, always such a polite kid. "I wanna, please... c-can you teach me how, how to touch myself? Down... there?"

Jesus fucking Christ. How could Peter still sound so innocent while basically asking how to finger his tight little hole? And why the fuck does his patient's utter naivety turn him on this much?

Swallowing hard, Tony determinedly presses the heel of his palm into the bulge tenting at his crotch and, feeling more like a dirty old pervert than ever, grates out into the receiver: "you mean, how to achieve prostate orgasm?"

"Y-yes... that," Peter huffs into his ear; seeming to sense his hesitation the boy adds on pleadingly, "please, Doctor? I need it, feel em- empty inside." And well, Tony had sworn a doctor's oath to help out the needy after all, hadn't he?

"Start with your index finger, sink in all the way to your knuckle," he mutters, and from the sudden cry on the other end Peter had followed his instructions without preamble; so the man grows bolder, now languidly palming at his rock-hard cock as he coaxes further in a low baritone, "curl your digits upwards now... yeah, does that feel good?" and "add another finger, there you go. Stretch yourself out a little."

When the incessant keening whines of "unhh, oh- ah, ah"'s from Peter pitch impossibly higher to an abrupt scream, Tony knows that the boy's probing fingers has finally found those sweet bundle of nerves-- and sure enough soon the most desperate little sobs can be heard distinctly from the speakers, choked off cries of "yes, fuck yes!" and "oh, Doctor!" so loud that Tony worries for the kid that his aunt would wake-- hell, he wouldn't be surprised if his patient hadn't awoken all the occupants of his apartment up with those cries.

"Shh, be quiet, that's a good boy," Tony utters, but his words achieve the opposite effect, for instead of keeping it down Peter's wailing "ah, wanna be good for you Doctor Stark!" from the end of his receiver is louder than ever; the man actually hears the squelching sound of Peter's fingers twisting deeper into his spasming hole-- Christ, wasn't that a beautiful image?-- and the splattering of come hitting skin.

"Fuck, Pete... oh," Tony groans, barely managing to cut off the 'baby' at the end of his sentence at the last minute. The teen's now breathing harshly down the line, soft pants that Tony swears he can feel against his ear; gripping the stiff length of his cock and pumping it hastily through his slacks, the man looks down and realises the grey cotton of the material is now stained dark from all his pre-come. "Christ," he grunts.

"Thank you, thank you so so much," Peter babbles as soon as he's finally caught his breath, his voice light with undeniable happiness; blissfully unaware of his doctor's predicament on the other end of the line. "That was incredible--"

"Hey, it's no problem kiddo," Tony cuts off before the boy could go onto another round of thanks again-- in other normal circumstances he wouldn't have minded, but at this moment all he can think about is jacking off. "I promised to always help, remember? Now go to bed, it's late... yes, goodnight kid. Sleep well."

As soon as Peter hangs up the doctor practically flings his phone to the side; shoving his slacks down urgently to finally wrap a hand around his leaking, painful erection. Biting down harshly on his lip and jerking his grip viciously, the imagery of a certain brown-eyed patient squirming underneath him plays unbidden behind his closed lids along with breathy little gasps of "harder, Doctor, please"-- it doesn't take long before Tony's hips are bucking off the bed and he's spilling hot and wet into his closed fist.

And if he comes with a deep groan of "Peter" under his breath, well, no one would ever have to know.

#starker #peter x tony #drabble #family unfriendly #doctor! tony can fuck me up tbh #inexperienced! peter #phone sex sorta #idea dump #accept the filth #concept

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thorne93 · 5 years

Text

Stan Lee University (Part 15)

Prompt: What would the Avengers be like in college, more importantly, what would they be like if Y/N existed around them?

Word Count: 1715

Warnings: drama, language, welcome to fluff town

Notes: This is based on a HC from @carryonmyswansong. They helped brainstorm and write part of this series. In this AU, no one will have powers, everyone is a normal human. Beta’d by @carryonmyswansong

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Aww it’s so good to see you too!” you said to your dad’s youngest sister as she came in. Christmas this year would be at your home.

So that meant your parents’ parents were there, your Aunt Jane and Uncle Ted, with their baby Belle. Your mom’s siblings, so that was five aunt and uncles, with four cousins on that side. Your sister and her boyfriend Alex.

It was a total madhouse, but you actually enjoyed it. All of you had Christmas dinner earlier in the day, and in an hour, you’d start opening presents. So far, your family had started to ask around about your new beau and you were happy to indulge them.

Until that started though, you wanted to chat with Stephen real quick. You two had agreed to open your presents over video chat to see each other’s expressions. It was time to do that. You’d gotten his gift three days ago and it sat in the corner of your room, like a neon light. You wanted to peek at it so badly, but you waited.

The wrapping paper was immaculate, shiny, and perfectly done. It made yours look like a hot mess, and you pride yourself on wrapping gifts.

You called him, setting up your laptop on your desk, your gift in your lap. As soon as his face appeared, you grinned and waved like an idiot.

“Merry Christmas!” you greeted happily.

“Merry Christmas,” he returned with a laugh, clearly amused at your cheer. “Did you get my gift?”

“I did. It’s taken a lot of restraint not to tear it open,” you admitted.

“I didn’t take half an hour to wrap that perfectly for you to destroy it in seconds,” he warned.

“What about you? Did you get mine?”

“Is that the one with a speedo in it?” he questioned with a slight frown.

“Aww, you weren’t supposed to open it yet!” you fake cried out, before smiling.

He grinned at you. “Yes, I got it. This shamble of a box you call a gift?” He held it up and you glared at him.

“Alright, so go ahead,” you encouraged.

“Me? Why do I have to go first?”

“Because I’m so excited for you to open it! I can’t wait to see your face! Please?”

He rolled his eyes, exaggerating his frustration. “Fine.” He began to tear at the paper, then cut open the box with his letter opener. “Alright, let’s see what we have he-- Oh my god,” he said, laughing so hard you thought he’d cry. “You got me Physics for Dummies?” he asked, holding up the book. “Really?”

“Hey, I figured you needed it,” you teased, shrugging your shoulders.

“Is that it? Or did you actually put thought into a gift for me?” he asked, leaning back over to look in the box. “Okay, looks like we’ve got Interview With A Vampire…”

“That’s the first movie I showed you. The first one you said you hadn’t seen,” you reminded.

“I know, I remember,” he said gently. “I still think you only watch that for the pretty faces in the film.”

“Why I watch a film is not important,” you retorted, stone faced.

He just chuckled before digging into the box again. “M&M’s, popcorn, and starburst?” He frowned, looking at you.

You nodded. “Mhm. Your favorites.”

“And… a pillow?” he questioned, clearly confused. He pulled it out and held it in his hands, examining it.

“Not just any pillow. Your pillow, from your room. I remembered you saying you wished you had your pillow from your house, because the ones there sucked. So I went and got it. I hope that’s okay?”

“That’s… no, yeah, that’s great. What’s all the other stuff for?”

“A movie night. You’ve been working so hard, I thought it might be nice to send you all your favorites to snuggle up for a little movie night. Plus, maybe watching Interview With A Vampire will help you think of me.”

“I don’t need any help thinking about you,” he said matter-of-factly as he looked into the camera. “This was all very thoughtful and sweet, thank you.”

“You’re welcome. I’m so glad you like it.”

“Alright, your turn. Come on,” he urged.

You grinned, excited to see him so enthusiastic. You slowly opened the paper. “Oh, would you look at that? Good paper, much wow. So impressed,” you teased, smiling.

“Just open the damned thing,” he ordered, shaking his head.

“Jeez, Scrooge, where’s your holiday spirit?”

“Wrapped up in that box, so you better open it fast before it dies,” he encouraged.

Quickly, you made your way through the paper. The box beneath was sealed. You grabbed scissors and cut the tape. Inside was a bundle of envelopes, a simple white and blue string tied around them. You slowly lifted them out, dropping the box to the floor beside you.

“What… what is this?” you asked, curious.

“They’re letters.”

“Thank you, Captain Obvious.”

“Well you seemed to be struggling to understand what they were, so I thought I’d help out.”

“Jackass, what are they for?” you said, giving him a bitch face, making him chuckle.

“They’re from me, to you. I, uh, wrote you a letter every day since I’ve been here.”

Immediately, one hand went to your mouth, to hide the fact that you just got hit in the gut with sentiment.

“I was going to send them, but I really want to get better at expressing myself to you, so I thought I’d start there. But I thought, until I got back, they might be a nice thing for you to have.”

Happy tears started to roll down your cheeks. No one had ever done anything so sweet, or thoughtful, or heartwarming as this for you before.

“I’m sorry if you were expecting an expensive gift or some souvenir from London. I just thought this might be nic--”

“Stephen, it’s perfect. Oh my god. Thank you. This is… I can’t wait to read them.”

You started to open the first one, your eyes skimming the first few lines, more tears flowing.

“I really didn’t mean to make you cry,” he said, unease and confusion wrapping his voice.

You shook your head. “No, no this is great. I love it. Thank you. I’ll read them all tonight.”

“I’m glad you like them,” he said with a smile.

Suddenly, your bedroom door opened and you wiped your face before putting the letters on your desk. You turned to see who came in. It was Belle.

“Hey, sugar! What are you doing? Where are your mommy and daddy?” you asked.

“Kiffen,” she said, toddling in, donning her pink camo shirt and little jeans.

“Well watcha doin?” you wondered.

“Seein’ you,” she informed. She walked up and tried to peek over your desk. “Who dat?”

You laughed, picking her up and putting her on your lap. “This, is Stephen. He’s my boyfriend. You want to say hi?”

She nodded and waved. “Hi!”

“Hello there,” Stephen greeted. “What’s your name?”

“Belle,” she said, kicking her feet.

“How old are you?”

“Three!” she proudly stated.

“Wow! That’s a big number.”

“Nuh-uh, five is.”

He chuckled. “I suppose it is bigger than three. What did you get for Christmas?”

She shrugged. “Don’t know.”

“We haven’t opened yet,” you explained to him.

“Ah, well are you excited?”

She nodded vigorously. “Yeah! I’m ‘posed to get a pony.”

“That’s pretty exciting. What else?”

“Finger paints! But mama said I can’t have finger paints cause I draw on walls. I just like pretty pictures.”

“I do too. I bet you make very pretty pictures.”

“Yeah! And mama says I can have a new Jeep.”

“Didn’t know you were old enough to drive,” he noted with delight in his voice.

For the next half hour those two talked and talked, about what, you weren’t totally sure. You got lost after ten minutes but Stephen seemed to be keeping up with the nonsense your cousin was spewing.

And it was incredibly sweet how patient he was. He never once seemed annoyed or like he wanted you to get rid of her. He just spoke to her, kindly. He didn’t patronize her or seem upset with her. Somewhere between talking about braiding hair and the newest doll that came out, you were swept off your feet all over again.

“Y/N, have you seen-- Oh there she is,” your Aunt Jane said, sliding into your room. “Sorry about that. I was helping your mom with that last dessert and she got away from me.”

“Not a problem. I always love seeing my Belle.” You tickled her foot as her mom picked her up.

“Is this Stephen?” Jane asked as she looked back at your laptop.

You nodded. “Yep. We were just exchanging gifts over video chat.”

“Oh. I won’t interrupt. But I just wanna say hi.” She leaned down and waved. “Hi, I’m her aunt Jane. We heard a lot of great things about you.”

“Well thank you. I’ve heard about you as well. It’s nice to meet you. Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas to you too.” She straightened back up and turned away from the monitor mouthing, “He’s hot.” She winked at you and patted your shoulder then walked out.

“Sorry about...well… all of that,” you said, laughing.

“Y/N, don’t apologize for having a family that loves and cares about you. I think it’s nice.”

“Alright.” You checked the time. “Ah, shit. I need to go. We’re opening presents in like ten minutes. I should probably help set the snacks out.”

“Alright. Yeah, I need to hit the hay.”

“Yeah… Thank you again for my gift. I love it, so much.”

“Sure thing. Thanks for my pillow. Now maybe I won’t wake up feeling like I slept on a cinder block.”

“Let’s hope not,” you said with a slight laugh.

“I love you. Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, love. I love you.”

You blew him a kiss and he smiled, waving to you before you got offline.

After that, you spent the rest of the time with your family, anticipating reading the first gift. One at a time, everyone opened and shared their presents. It was heartwarming, being around everyone, basking in everyone’s joy, anticipation, and excitement.

This was a very merry Christmas indeed….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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#stan lee university #stephen strange #stephen strange x reader #stephen strange fic

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buckgasms · 6 years

Text

Request - A Buzzing Relationship

Anonymous said:

Hey could you maybe write a Bucky x shy reader smut where the reader usually doesn't dress revealingly but decides to one day to tease Bucky. However Dom Bucky sees this as a challenge and teases her by constantly trying to make the reader all hot and bothered before then stopping his advances when they get past kissing. But after a while he stops being so self restrained and they have very kinky sex. Idk if you want such a detailed request but I adore your writing so much xxx ☺

Anonymous said:

hi would you do a Bucky reader where he finds your vibrator and then teases her about it and then uses it on her??

Hey beautiful followers! I have been a bit cheeky and combined these two requests, but they just sparked a lot of.....thoughts when I read them together. I hope you guys enjoy and I will hopefully be updating soon!

Also I just wanted to say that all the little messages, requests and reblogs really have made me smile recently, especially when I’v had a bad day so thank you all so much for being so kind and being so patient with my slow ass! xxx

If you would like to be tagged or make a request just let me know bb :)

Warnings: I mean...if the requests aren’t dirty enough for you, you might wanna look away now, or get yaself somewhere private

Taking a deep breath you quickly smoothed your hands over your ass, making sure the short skirt you were wearing wasn’t showing off too much. Paired with the sheer shirt you had on, you were feeling slightly exposed. This wasn’t your usual choice of outfit, but today you had big plans for your man.

Bucky was scribbling notes in a journal when you walked into the meeting room he was sat in, with some of the other Avengers. He didn’t see you come in and looked up suddenly when he heard Natasha wolf-whistle at you. You rolled your eyes and her, before locking eyes with Bucky, and noticed with some glee, his jaw clench and his hand instinctively grip tighter on the pen he was holding, the metal plates of his arm whirring in the quiet space between you.

“Mind if I sit here?” you grinned, gesturing at the seat next to him and he nodded, pulling the seat out for you, perhaps a little too roughly in his haste to get you next to him. When you sat down he leaned in close, and whispered in your ear. “You look very pretty baby…that’s a nice bra”. He eyed you up once more before planting a kiss to your cheek. You felt heat spread all over you, from your cheeks to a slight rush to your core, which was only fuelled by his hand gently gripping onto your thigh under the desk.

Bucky and you had been dating for a while, but more importantly you had established a very slow moving Dom/sub relationship with him that was still in the early stages. Your love for each other had ensured complete trust, and he had never pushed you too far (although sometimes you wished he might push a little bit more). You had recently discovered what happened if you teased Bucky and you had rather enjoyed the being laid out over his lap as he spanked you, so you were excited to see where today might lead.

As Steve began the meeting about some mission or another, you focused on your own mini-mission under the table. Slowly you moved your arm under the table until your hand was resting on Bucky’s thigh, and you gently squeezed at his thick muscle, making him shift slightly in his seat. As Steve turned to point at the screen, Bucky gripped your thigh tighter and pulled you towards him. He leaned back over to you and growled in your ear. “That’s a rocky road princess…don’t think this ain’t gonna sting later.”

You squirmed in your chair, but forced yourself to stare right into his eyes as your hand made contact with his crotch, a flicker of pride as you felt a definite stiffness there. Encouraged by his reaction you leaned in even closer, squeezing gently and moaning just a little. Bucky smirked.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn ya”.

————

As Bucky made his way to your bedroom, he couldn’t help rethink about the morning’s events. He knew you would try something like this eventually, he was actually quite proud you had managed to last this long. But Bucky was a cautious Dom. He didn’t want to ever push you around, so he would have to take it slow with you until he was satisfied you were ready for all the kinky things he had in mind for you.

Walking in, in that outfit was pretty ballsy, and he knew it wasn’t an outfit you would have picked normally. He normally found you wrapped up in cosy jumpers, fluffy socks and leggings. Not that he minded that, but he definitely appreciated your actions this morning. Maybe you were ready after all?

He let himself in to your room. You had borrowed/stolen one of his favourite sweaters and he was on a mission to retrieve it. He headed over to your big chest of drawers, admiring the photos of the two of you together that you had framed. He fiddled with your little kitten-ear headband and thought that you were just perfect in every way. Even when you misbehaved.

Opening the top drawer he rummaged through until he found what he was looking for, a small smirk on his lips. As he pulled the jumper out, he heard a clunk as something hit the bottom of the drawer. Reaching in his hands wrapped around a hard plastic object. As he pulled it out into the light, his smirk spread into a wider grin.

—————

When Bucky returned to the dinner table he was wearing your (his) favourite sweater and a strange grin on his face. You decided to ignore it when he came up behind you, stroking your hair and planting a kiss on your lips.

“Nice sweater” you chuckle as he takes a seat next to you, his hand taking its usual spot on your thigh. His grins a little too wide for your lame joke, but you are suddenly engaged in conversation with Wanda, so you guess it would have to wait.

By the time dessert was served you were positive something was up with Bucky. You were doing your best to maintain a conversation with the rest of the gang, but the fingers creeping under your skirt, it was proving a challenge.

After a lull in conversation you focused your attention on the man in question. His fingers didn’t stop their movements as he pushed your panties aside.

“Now who’s misbehaving sir?” you whispered, just for him to hear

“I think you should excuse yourself now Kitten…we need to discuss you behaviour from this morning.”

You blushed and did as you were told, making your excuses to the group and heading off to ‘bed’.

Once you returned to your room your eyes were immediately drawn to your bed. Crisply made but with one addition. Your vibrator. Sitting there in all it’s glory.

Suddenly things were starting to make sense.

The door behind you shut with a click and you spun to see Bucky grinning like a wolf at you. “You always act so shy baby… but you’re a dirty little kitten aren’t you?” You couldn’t think of any words as he cupped your cheeks, his thumbs rubbing your cheeks softly. His softness and dirty talk was always something you couldn’t resist, and you leaned forward, stealing a kiss from him.

He returned the kiss, and walked you backwards until your legs hit the mattress. He unzipped your skirt, and it fell to the floor as you walked back. You broke the kiss and looked up at him. “What am I going to do with you kitten? Hmm, being such a bad girl…” You felt your heart pound in your chest, but you knew what you wanted.

“Maybe you should…punish me sir?” you whispered

He grinned at you then pushed you abruptly so you fell with a shriek onto the bed. You recovered quickly and managed to prop yourself up on your elbows. He motioned at your shirt and you quickly removed it, as he began to take his own shirt off.

As you lay there, waiting for his instruction he started to crawl over you, his larger frame covering your body, his thigh planting firmly against your core, only a thin slip of lace covering you. As he kissed you, you couldn’t help but grind against him, a low moan slipping passed your lips.

Bucky chuckled. “I was thinking Princess…since you like teasing so much…maybe that should be your punishment tonight?” He sat up a little, looking down at your swollen lips, huffing as you waited for his decision. He held up your vibrator and waved it at you, “and since you’ve been hiding this like a dirty girl, it seems to make sense…what do you think baby?”

You were so turned on, you weren’t quite sure you knew how to answer other than to nod your head. Your body relaxed, opening yourself up to him, letting him remove your bra. He guided your hands up to the headboard. “Don’t let go, or I’ll make it harder for you baby” he warned and you gripped tight, hoping you weren’t going to find out what that meant.

With a swift rip he tore your panties apart, leaving you completely exposed. You fought the urge to cover yourself, but remembering Bucky’s warning, not to mention the way his eyes raked over you, made you keep still.

“Good girl” he growled, as his hands traced all over your soft skin. You felt hot all over, your pussy already soaked and he had barely started with you. You watched as he flicked on the vibrator, the low buzzing sound filling the room. He hovered over your thigh, dragging the head across your skin. He travelled across your stomach, making you wriggle a little. When he pressed the vibrator to you breast you couldn’t stop your moan.

“Enjoying yourself kitten? You like that?”

You moaned a yes in response as he travelled back down to your throbbing pussy. As soon as it made contact with your clit your legs clamped shut, or at least they tried, but Bucky pried them apart. Your grip on the headboard made your knuckles white as he upped the pressure and flicked through some of the different settings, just to test your reaction.

When the vibrator hit it’s fastest setting you squealed in pleasure. He wiggled it against you and you felt yourself coming close to the edge.

“Bucky?” You whined as he pressed harder, moved faster. His hand pressed your stomach down firmly, keeping you as still as possible. “Can I come please? Pretty please?” you moaned and he looked up at you.

“Not yet baby”

And with that he removed the vibrator.

Uh oh.

———————-

Almost an hour later you were a shivering, sweaty mess. You had been brought to the edge more times than you could count but Bucky had never let you, not once. Not even when he combined his fingers with the vibrator, brushing your g-spot mercilessly. Not even when he used his mouth to suck on your clit as the vibrator travelled over your entrance, over your nipples and certainly not when he adjusted to have you sucking on his cock while he tortured you. Several times you had accidentally let go of the headboard, to grab at Bucky’s arm, which had just extended your punishment.

Eventually he realised he couldn’t keep you still so you were now perched in his lap, his arm wrapped around your thigh, keeping you open to him. You were clinging to his arm, holding on for dear life, eyes glassy as he continued to play with you.

He turned to look at you, his possessiveness making him cling to you tighter. He leaned over and kissed you, hard, biting and bruising. You mumbled and moaned as you felt your climax draw closer for the millionth time.

“Have you learnt your lesson now baby? You gonna be a good girl from now on?” he whispered as he peppered kisses over your cheek. As he waited for your answer he dragged his teeth across your throat.

“Yes sir…please, please…I’ll be a good girl, I promise”

He gave you another, softer kiss and pushed you back slowly. You fell back on the bed, your legs wide, the vibrator still pressed against your clit, thrumming slowly against you. You sobbed with desire as his cock pressed against your sensitive folds.

“Please daddy, please?” you begged. With your eyes squeezed shut you missed the look of pride and arousal on his face, and he pushed his cock all the way inside. You moaned loudly, clawing at his chest as he growled at you. He managed to stay still for a moment, to relish the feel of you already fluttering around him.

He took the opportunity to cover your neck and chest in bites, kisses and hickies. All you could do was cling to him as he began pounding into you. Every stroke of his cock brushed your most sensitive spot and his pace was relentless. You could no longer control your voice, constantly begging him for release, not sure you could hold on for much longer.

Looking at your beautiful face, he could barely contain himself. He figured you had probably learnt your lesson by now…but even if you hadn’t he could just do this again right? “Come for me baby girl…come for me kitten”

He continued fucking you and placed the vibrator back onto your clit and that was all you could take. Your orgasm ripped through you like a storm. Every part of your body felt like it was going to burst with raw pleasure. In the distant part of your mind you could hear Bucky give a low roar in your ear as his teeth sank down onto your shoulder. Your fingers dug into the thick muscles in his back and by the time he came, you were shaking with pleasure.

Your body took a little while to readjust, but Bucky gathered you up in his arms and pulled you close to him, wrapping a blanket around you both. He tucked you under his chin as you came back to reality, very slowly. He peppered your faces with soft kisses and whispered softly how good you were, how beautiful and how perfect you were.

When you finally came back to him, you felt warm, cosy and very satisfied. As you lay in his arms he checked you were ok. Gently he stroked at the different bruises and marks he’d left on you, checking each one, making sure you were ok. The ache between your legs brought firm fingers massaging at your thighs until they began to feel much, much better.

“So? You learned your lesson baby?” he mumbled against your skin, you could actually feel the smile on his lips.

“Yeah I guess so….might need a reminder at some point in the future”

Tags: Tags: @rodkrake @starkxpotts @moni-poloni @reniescarlett @nolaimagines@youreahandsomedevil @sergeipoluninfans

#request #fic #bucky #bucky x reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barns x reader #bucky fanfic

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