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yan-lorkai · 27 days

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.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ A/N: Was listening some horror stories while I finished some projects then got inspired by it and wrote this. Hope u guys like it <3

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Warnings: Platonic yandere content, kidnapping, murder. Probably typos too.

"Nuh-uh, dad!" You looked at the book Lilia carried with him. He had read this book for you a thousand times and a pout formed on your lips, already thinking how you would have to bear this torture again.

There was nothing wrong with the stories, per say. But they get a little old and boring when you had heard them this many times. And Lilia was quite forgetful so asking him to buy other books wasn't always a successful endeavor. Though when you asked him to create a story he told you he wans't creative enough either. You aren't having any of that. You were tired of hearing about snow white, rapunzel, ugly duckling and all the classics. You wanted something new and today you would have it.

"Tell me another story, please!" You asked, making your best puppy eyes at him. Those eyes worked on Silver and Sebek, so you wanted to try on him as well. His reaction was different from the one you were expecting though, Lilia smiled and patted your head.

You loved having him read to you - it was your favorite activity to bond with your father, where you solved mysteries with him and laughed at silly pickup lines, but Lilia was still fond of the classics. There was though another book, called The General Tales. The author was unknown and the cover was painted a dark red, it was strange. And you hadn't the chance to read it because your father was very conscious about it, hiding when you so much as glanced in its direction.

You could only suppose it was a horror book. But you were already quite grown up. You were almost 13 years old! You could sit through any story he read without having nightmares! He didn't seem to agree.

"What am I going to do with you, little batty?" Lilia mused to himself when you showed the book. There was an excited glee in his eyes whenever he looked at it, as if it contained his favorite memories; little did you know what was written on those pages and how much blood they had seen. How much blood Lilia used to write those same pages.

He smiled finally. Dangerously, like he did when you pranked him and he was plotting his revenge.

You make space in your bed for him to sit beside you and he opened those secret pages you had always wondered about. They were yellowed by the time and some were dog eared, written in a beautiful yet hushed cursive. You were fascinated.

Lilia waited till you made yourself comfortable, laying your head against his chest and body nestled into his side, so he turned some pages, humming to himself. You could only think what kind of story would he read to you. You could only hope it was scary. It wans't night time yet and even if you got scared then surely at night, when he put you to bed, you would have already forgotten all the gorey details. Right...?

"There was a couple who lived happily at the woods," Lilia's deep voice started its tale and you closed your eyes to fully immerse yourself in your imaginnation as you listened to him. "but then a plague started to poison the soil and their crops were destroyed. The walk to the nearest village used to take a whole day to go and another to come back. The husband tried to hunt animals to feed his lover and their one year old child but he failed each and every time. Without other options he started traveling to this village."

"Wait, what about the plague?" You asked fulled with curiosity. Then you through to yourself why they didn't tried to make it go away somehow.

Either they tried and didn't worked. Or they didn't even thought about it. Nonetheless, you brushed it off as they don't having this knowledgment. But this bugged you for a second. Humans and faes knew about plagues and how to get rid of them, they been doing this since they were brought to existence.

Your question made Lilia smile cheerfully, you observed. He must be proud of you for asking this, as he had homeschooled you and used to brag about how smart you was to anyone who wanted to listen - he'd brag even if they didn't want to hear. "Ah, you see, they were bad people. The soil knew this and rejected them, my dear."

Well... Growing in Briar Valley you knew this was probable to happen. Fae were internally linked to their florests and woods, and rivers and oceans, and everything nature could touch. That was also why Lilia raised both you and your older brother, Silver, in the woods. He used to take both of you to fish, and swim and watch the dawn all the time. Though time changed and life got busier, maybe you ask him to take you fishing again someday. Or to go camping somewhere.

"Makes sense, what happened to them then?"

"The man bought everything he needed, every last golden coin spent. But he had food for months to come, he was already imagining what his wife would cook on the way back when an incident happened."

Lilia turned the page and you could see a little drawing of a man horse riding into the horizon. Then he started reading again after taking in your expressions.

"A stag came running at him, the horse didn't react at time and both animals collided. Wounded, the animal couldn't walk and neither could the man who had fallen and sprained his ankle. Snow was falling, surrounding him like a veil, all the food he brought with their remaining gains lost there. He thought to himself 'I'm going to die certainly', rejected he was once, rejected he was at that moment. Lost and in pain, feeling miserable, he tried to stand but failed. Every attempt more painful than the other. A river was falling from his eyes when he finally gave up."

Your heart ached at this. But you hoped for the better. Freezing and being left hungry during winter sounded like hell. Lilia pinched your cheek when he noticed you frowning. He laughed at the face you make at him, annoyed at your father's antics.

Lilia smiled. "Nope. Nope, instead he had heard a voice from the woods, a hooded figure was suddenly standing in front of him. He could only see the figure's blood red eyes."

"Oh no, did he die?"

You looked at your father. "Your eyes are red!"

Lilia nodded, his leg bouncing with how excited he was from reading this story. "Do you think the hooded figure was me?"

"Well, it was?" You replied with another ask. Your father didn't respond.

Instead he continued reading. "If I save you, what can you get me in return? The hooded figure asked, crouching to be on the man height. Their touch was tender as they wiped his tears and looked at him, but there was something in them that make him tremble more than snow could. There was something truly evil behind those eyes, something terrible behind that smile. The man didn't answer nor said anything for various minutes. Though for him, hours seemed to have passed. Maybe even years as he looked at those eyes."

"Nah, I didn't think it was you," You thought out loud. "Your eyes are very beautiful and gentle."

Returning your little compliment, Lilia squeezed you in a side hug while laughing. "Oh, thank you sugar. Your eyes are beautiful too."

"But they aren't red as yours." You pouted.

"You wanted them to be?" You nodded. Nor you or Silver have his red eyes. But you wish you had. His eyes were unique, were cute but also intimidating. So intimidating when he wanted them to be that you were imagining that the hooded figure had those same eyes.

You both stayed in that hug before you remind him to read again. There were fewer pages to go now. And again there was a drawing, this time you could see the man with that figure chatting while snow pilled beside them, as if the cold didn't bothered them. Then on another page he stood up and a carriage had appeared, he held the wet food in his arms, saving whatever it was possible to save. He would go back home to his family.

But at what price? It wans't written. The author had keeped too vague.

"When he arrived home, with a new horse and a carriage, which the hooded figure told him to sell for its quality was impressive and he would gain even more gold than he had spended, he was his child running at him, happy that their, uh, father had finally returned. The entire time though, the man could still feel the figure's eyes on him, could see those eyes in his mind. But he pushed those thoughts out of his mind, held his child and whirled around with them to they laughed. He watched them disappear back inside when they got too cold. And then he explained what had happened to his wife, she deserved to know."

He explained this incident with the stag, about the hooded figure and the deal he made with it. And very lowly he whispered how he wouldn't follow his part of the deal - and lying to a fae is something one must never do. Something he shouldn't have done. But he did. And that's the soil reject them even more.

Beneath the earth it was possible to feel the tremors or the wind that pushed everything out of its way. Lilia read how the man dealed with each and every tribulation, how he passed the trials and went his way around the deal, doind the bare minimum to ensure only his and his family safety. He only forgotten that the figure could see him.

"Then one night the hooded figure came to pay him a visit. It knocked on the door and it smiled when it saw the wife holding her child, looking at it with clear fear in her eyes. Like her husband, the wife was trembling in its presence. She let it enter, if anything because she couldn't send him away, she didn't know with what she was dealing, she couldn't act wrong and jeopardize her child safety. Instead she played the role of a welcoming hostess."

Lilia paused a second to breathe then he smiled as if he too was imagining what happened next. Pressed against him you were still. Were it going to kill everyone?

"Please, you may sit here. Do you want to eat something or perhaps are you thirsty? She asked. The air around them was tense. Though her child was poking the stranger without fear, filled with innocent curiosity. The figure picked the child and looked at their eyes. A carnivorous smiled streched on it's face. 'This will be not necessary' the figure said.'"

Another dramatic pause. It was so silent you could hear the birds flying from a considerate distance. It was so silent that you could focus on the blood flowing on your veins. You were anxious to know what happened next. And your father seemed to take fun on this, delaying his narrative to look at the drawing of the figure and the child. This one was colored and you noticed that the child looked just like you. Same hairstyle and same color eye, even same skin color.

You didn't know how to feel about it. You was thinking about what the figure would do to that child. Coming from a horror book you had only one guess. Lilia though didn't share your apprehension as he started narrating again.

"'Call your husband and let's eat. Together. No lies this time or this cutie will pay the price.' The figure warned her. But it know what was fated to happen. The couple were liars and no good persons. Of course they were going to lie. When everyone was seated to eat, the wife served first her guest then her husband then her child and finally herself; though the figure was still holding the child. The wife looked like she wanted to ask something but held her tongue."

Lilia licked his fingers and turned the page. Your heart breaked at the drawing. It seemed painful and explicit but you keeped yourself from looking away, you asked for him to read and you wanted to hear and see everything.

"'Open wide, little one.' The figure told the child, holding Its own spoon of soup to feed the baby. The mother seemed alarmed by it as if she had just done something stupid. And she did, poisoned the figure's spoon and plate, and food too. She held its hand and looked at it with pleading eyes. She fell to her knees, afraid for her child's life and security, stuttering and mumbling. 'please, don't.' she asked it. And a laughed escaped the hooded figure's lips, so sweet, so dangerous, he looked at the child who made grabby hands at the food. 'I said no lies yet you lied to me, tried to deceit me when I've been nothing if good for the both of you. And what did I asked in return? Say it, word by word, to her, mighty husband.' The wife looked at her husband."

"But it was so vague... Dad, what did it said?" At this your father patted your hair, twirling his fingers in your hair to distract you. He almost never replied to you in these moments, wanting you to draw your own conclusions. Still you wished he answered you on this matter. You were too curious and inquisitive.

"'I want you to restore the crops with this insecticide I'm giving you, I want you to make house for the birds and for you to clean the rivers when they thaw. And... And I want your first-born, f-for them to take your place, a-a life for a lif...' The husband answered, without finding his wife's eyes. Though he didn't looked at her, he knew how the color vanished from her face and how she was stunned into silence. He had never mentioned the part where the figure wanted their child, had he done that she would killed him herself. Her pregnancy was problematic and painful but she was so happy that her child was here now, she was delighted to her their little laugh and see them starting to walk and talk. And he stole all this from her."

You gripped your father's arm, you aren't expecting this betrayal. You expected the hooded figure to be the killer who would slaughter everyone and then dance upon their corpses. But there was something intimately sad knowing that someone so close as a father to his own child, could be a liar. You felt a bad taste on your tongue. Though part of you was excited to see where things were going now. Would be possible for this story to have a happily after all? Part of you didn't know but you hoped so.

"'You lied to me? About this?' The poor wife was inconsolable, struggling even to stand still as her whole face burned with ire. She knew nothing could be done. Maybe it was her own fear, maybe it was the figure's presence who seemed to feed into her negative feelings, the next second she threw herself on top of her husband punching and screaming at him. Her chair had fallen to the ground with her plate, food flying everywhere. The hooded figure sighed but tucked the child's face in his neck for them to not see this. The couple flighted like two angry kittens, disjointed, clumsy, without really knowing where to hit to hurt more. It was pitiful to watch. It hummed while the scene unfolded before its eyes. They fought and screamed but the figure still soothed the scared child who gripped its clothes hard. It prevent them from turning around, holding them tightly against it. 'Just a second, little one.' it told them."

A knife fell from the table when the husband managed to kick his wife off him. She hitted her back at the wooded table's leg but took the knife and looked at him with bloodthirsty eyes. She tried to stab him but he dodge and evaded every attack, he laughed at it. And she was feeling angry, so angry she'd die if she could kill him and then the entity who watched them in silence. "I hate you. You ruined everything. You couldn't even do a thing right!"

Her words were words of a frightened woman and, above all, a mom who knew she had lost her child. The precious child who bringed so much life and happiness into her life. You felt sad at this. They were both bad. The husband for making the deal and then not following it, and the wife for trying to poison the hooded figure without trying to ask what it wanted. You wonder if things would have ended differently if they didn't lie.

"The husband could only smile and roll his eyes at this. Nothing he could say was going to be enough, nothing he could say was going to comfort her or save them from their demise. The fight ended when he twisted her own arm and stabbed her with the knife, twisting. She fell on the ground painfully, blood painting the carpet. The last thing she saw was her child sleeping on that creature's arms."

You sniffled, trying to stifle your cry so not get attention of your father. But he was perceptive, always was. He could know what you were doing even if he wasn't in the same room you were. It was a dad instinct kinda of thing, you thought once.

Lilia patted your head, letting you feel what you were feeling without commenting on the small tears that rolled down your chest or tease you. He had told you and Silver multiple times to not be ashamed to cry or feel freely, to not repress your emotions. And you weren't ashamed by it. But you did thought you were overreacting a little. It was just a story after all!

"The now armed man swinged at the hooded figure, tears falling from his eyes the same way they have fallen weeks before. This time though he had an ever more serious reason to cry, he had killed his wife. He lost the one he loved it and it was all that hooded figure fault. Or so he said to himself, still lying. Fighting though was futile, his effort was futile, he was no match for the figure, so agile and fast, even if it was holding a sleepy baby on its arms, it still could fight with ease as if battle and fight were it's old friends. It killed the man easily, with a swing of it's hands and a little magic, the man joined his wife in the afterlife where she would want him down eternally."

You jumped a little when he closed the book, looking at him in disbelief. The tears had dried on your eyes but they were still a little red from crying. "That's how it ends?"

Lilia nodded then added. "Though there's still a line. It goes like: the entity looked at the child affectionately, it had what it wanted, it had the child. The hooded figure finally lowered the hood from its face, revealing its young and yet deceitful appearance. It was a he and he looked at the child gently. 'I'm going to call you Yuu. Fufufu, how does that sound, Yuu?'"

You whined in surprise. It was your name! You liked to think that your name was unique and no one else had it, just so you could feel a little special, but at that moment you didn't know how you felt. There were so many plot twists in that story, your mind seemed to run a marathon by how hard you were thinking about everything. Only thing you could muster was. "They were dumbing, lying to a fae."

Though you wonder... Why there was a drawing of a child so similar to you and that also has your name? You searched for you father's eyes and found him him staring at you. But he wasn't staring how he used to stare, it was mischievous, evil. Dangerous. You found out that you couldn't move, paralyzed in fear while his eyes searched for something inside your soul. Whatever it was he seemed happy, his gaze softening as the minutes passed, his headpats returning slowly.

"How does tea sounds, little one?" He asked. It sounded like death coming from him, Lilia managed to even burn the water. You mumbled something, too busy thinking about the story to care that you were about to be poisoned by Lilia's tea. There was many puzzle pieces missing for you to complete the entire frame.

Maybe someday, Lilia thought with a smug smile.

#yandere twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland #yandere lilia #yandere lilia vanrouge #yandere lilia x yuu #yandere lilia x mc #yandere lilia x reader #lilia x mc #lilia x reader #lilia x yuu #lilia vanrouge #lilia vanrouge x reader #twst lilia #twst lilia vanrouge #tw yandere #platonic yandere #male yandere #gender neutral reader #lorkai oneshot

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ask-whitepearl-and-steven · 11 months

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Do you ever struggle not sharing details of your story / spoiling people? It's one of the hardest parts of writing for me! I always want to just divulge all of my ideas immediately!

The answer, weirdly enough... is no!

And a part of that is definitely due to me being a giant, secret-hoarding dragon in disguise. But another part of that is the fact that I largely suspect that...

Keeping secrets and avoiding spoilers is the reason this comic is still alive and updating.

Now, that may sound odd. Why would keeping secrets help me post? Sharing work is kind of the life-blood of a lot of creative endeavors. Storytelling is an inherently social activity. All humans, even the most introverted ones, thrive on peer recognition and feedback.

But over the years, I've come to realize something about myself. And this realization may be mostly stemming from me, but I suspect it's actually a pretty common factor for other creatives as well. So maybe I should talk about it (again).

Let me introduce you to something I call...

The Emperor's New Accomplishment.

Here's the thing. I'm an extremely introverted, non-social person. I can go for months without talking to friends easily, even if I love them a whole lot. That all being said, I'm still a human being, and my brain derives happy-social-animal chemicals from being recognized as A Person With Traits. Humans are built that way! We can't avoid it.

So what you gotta understand is - at all times, our brain is seeking social/peer recognition like it seeks out high-calorie foods. And it (largely) does not care what we have to do to get it.

Herein lies the problem.

Usually, creating stuff and thinking about stories and then sharing what we wrote with friends is a great way to get that happy chemical.

But it's time consuming. And difficult. And there's a shortcut.

What we seek when we create Scenarios and Characters and Conflicts is not hard work toiling away writing/drawing/constructing stuff. Many artists actively enjoy this process, but it's grueling.

And just telling our friends about our ideas actually accomplishes the end goal, as far as our brain is concerned! We made up ideas! We told people about it! We got the Good Feelings!

So when I tell people about my Plans to Write A Comic or Ideas To Make a Story, what I'm actually doing is tricking my brain into thinking 'wow, this feels great! We have accomplished the task we set out to do! No more effort necessary!'

And that motivation to actually draw/write/create?

It goes directly into the trashcan.

Now I'm not saying this to suggest people who do this/fall prey to this are lazy. They're not!

But our brains are. They're lazy, and they want to save energy. And they don't care if you WANTED to actually make the story. They will gladly rip the Motivation energy out of our grubby little hands when they no longer deem it necessary to the process.

So - why do I keep so many secrets? How do I stop myself from talking about what happens next in the story?

I'm doing it to keep my actual comic alive.

Disclaimer: Not everyone functions like this, obviously. Everyone has a different creative process. But this is how I've realized MY brain works, so I now take steps to trick my brain back into working. Ha! Take that, brain! Two can play at this--waitaminute.

#chekhov answers #the funny thing is #i am my brain #but damn am i just dangling a carrot in front of myself most of the time

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seventh-district · 6 months

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vent post pt. 2, the dreaded sequel

#Seven’s Public Diary #vent #vent post #cw vent #cw vent post #okay the ‘never ever wanted to die’ part isn’t exactly true. i just don’t count how i felt from the ages of 12-15 or so #because that was a very strange time where i’m honestly not sure how much of what i felt was even real or honest #and how much of it was really just a kid needing help and expressing it very poorly #but from 15/16 onward or whatever exact age i was when i had my whole ‘oh holy fuck i really really don’t want to die’ crisis/awakening #from then i’ve always been vehemently on the side of life and wanting to live as long as i possibly can #which is interesting because things have done nothing but get exponentially worse and more difficult for me ever since #but smthn shifted in me when i realized Oh Fuck I Actually Want To Live and that desire has yet to be defeated #but anyways enough bragging about how much i don’t want to die lmao #it really does feel like bragging since it’s obvious to me that so many other people don’t feel that way #and i hate that. i wish no one ever had to deal with feeling that bad and death being the only thing their mind jumps to as a solution #sigh. anyways #i regret to inform y’all so i’m making this little announcement in these tags where hopefully no one will even see it lmao #but uh. unfortunately i’ll probably be delaying all of my creative endeavors for the next little bit #until i take care of the pressing real life issues that are weighing me down and until i am in a better environment #that will actually be conducive to my creativity instead of me struggling to make things while also struggling to just. like… live. y’know #and i know it’s not like there’s really anyone out there on the edge of their seat to consume anything i make #but this little announcement is more for myself than anyone else i guess. i have to almost force myself/give myself permission #to stop working on my various projects. and instead work on getting all of my irl ducks in a row. and get to a place where i feel safe(er)#because i’m really working against myself right now. cart before the horse almost.#so caught up in personal projects and future dreams that i’m ignoring the current growing issues in my day to day life #and i’ve done good in the later half of this year at beginning to tackle them one by one #but driving and potentially moving out of things don’t change here are the two biggest ones that i’ve yet to face #so i really have to accept that i need to change those and as a byproduct of that- stop dividing my attention onto so many other things #so my usual snail-pace of writing and video making (even tho the video making has mostly been behind the scenes work thus far)#is going to screech to an almost-halt while i focus on personal stuff. and next year should be much better as a result

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kpopastrologys · 1 year

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💘✨✨💝💕💖 Venus aspects 💘✨✨💘

◾ Venus conjunct Ascendant

You have a charm and an appeal about you that others cannot resist. You draw people to you like a magnet and you have the uncanny knack of attracting anything and everything you need. You know how to tell people exactly what they want to hear, which is not always good. At times it is difficult for you to say no because you do not want to hurt anyone. Yet you do not see that many times you use people and think quite nothing of it. Remember that one day you will reap what you sow.

◾ Venus conjunct Jupiter

You are a generous, warm-hearted and open-handed person who shares every resource with others. You give of both yourself and your possessions to those whom you favor. You do not want to be limited in any way, either with your affections or with your personal possessions. You enjoy luxury and refinement and you desire to always be in comfortable, elegant surroundings. You hate having to get your hands dirty. You are charming, gracious and charitable and you are the model host or hostess. This aspect brings material good fortune, which has been earned from previous lives. If there is a negative here, then it is your tendency towards self-indulgence, over-extravagance and laziness. Sometimes things come to you so easily that you do not appreciate them. Things are most appreciated if one has to work hard for them. There may be a love of rich, sweet food as well as too much of it, hence a tendency to gain weight. You are a very gentle and social person who loves harmony, beauty and travel. There may be vulnerability through emotional, ethical or moral naivete.

◾ Venus conjunct Mars

You are extremely amorous and romantic and there are times when you find it difficult to control your passions. You seem to be a magnet to the opposite sex, regardless of whether most people would classify you as beautiful or attractive, although you may well be. You are simply fun and pleasant to be around and that is why you attract so much attention. When you are interested in someone, you tend to pursue them with all the fire within you. Of course, sometimes you come on just a little too strongly and that can cause difficulties. You have a strong desire for love and beauty and involving yourself in some type of creative activity, whether it be art, music, sculpture or poetry, would help to satisfy this inner craving. The more you channel your creativity into means such as these, the less problems you will have controlling your hormones.

This aspect brings a certain charisma and you seem to naturally draw people around you. You like to socialize and are perhaps happiest when surrounded by others. In fact, it may be hard for you to be alone in your own company. You have a great need to give and receive affection from others. Just be careful of where you place your affections. Not everyone feels the same as you do. It is sometimes difficult for you to take any relationship lightly, hence the need to be discriminating with where your heart is placed. This can be a difficult aspect at times because it tends to produce love-hate relationships with those you care about. There are hostile and affectionate feelings both at the same time towards the same person. Channel your energies into creative endeavors.

◾ Venus conjunct Neptune

You tend to be what some people call the hopeless romantic. You are very idealistic about love and romance and many times it isn't so much the case that you love someone or that you are in love with someone as it is that you are in love with love. You tend to put your loved one on a pedestal and this can bring problems because when the loved one eventually does something to "fall from grace", then huge disappointment and disillusionment set in and you are crushed. You need to stop looking at the world through rose-colored glasses and see things for how and what they really are.

There is danger of falling into the wrong type of relationship, a relationship of co-dependence. Either you or your partner may enjoy or feel obligated to play the role of martyr, victim or savior. Remember that no good relationship is unequal. Two equal partners who neither feel the need to save or be saved make the best couple.

◾ Venus conjunct Pluto

You have deep, compelling and sometimes irrational feelings of love and passion and you will not settle for a relationship that isn't intense. You are wildly passionate towards the ones you love, as well as being perhaps jealous and possessive of them as well. Whatever you feel, you want to feel it down to the deepest level of your existence. Of course this can cause problems with everyday life because no relationship can be that intense and that interesting all the time. At times you do not care whether the emotions you feel are good or bad as long as they are powerful. So agony and ecstasy are both okay with you, although you're not silly enough to prefer the agony. Well, maybe. These intense relationships, even if they do not last, have a way of transforming you and that is why you instinctively seek them out or why they seem to come to you.

You tend to have a certain emotional fanaticism about the things you care about. It's all or nothing — there are no half-way measures for you. There can be trouble through emotional excesses, misplaced passions or the loss of control of the sensual nature. Self-control and self-discipline are necessary or you may self-destruct. Channel your hormonal energies into things creative, such as art, music, poetry, sculpture, drama, etc. You must not allow yourself to become too self-indulgent or hedonistic. Feelings of jealousy, envy and possessiveness must be controlled or any relationship will be eventually destroyed. You need to develop your self-confidence so that feelings of insecurity do not drive you over the edge. All these experiences all meant to force you to reconsider and transform your values.

◾ Venus conjunct Saturn

Intimacy with another does not come easy for you. You have been hurt in the past and you are reluctant to open up to others because you fear being hurt again. It is painful to relive bad experiences and you have sort of resolved within yourself that if you do not get involved, then you won't get hurt. As Simon and Garfunkle once said, "I am a rock, I am an island". As a result of your experiences, people may think you are cold, aloof, unfeeling and uncaring. The challenge here is for you to learn to open up and warm up to people, regardless of the possible consequences. You need to remember that you cannot find true love if you are unwilling to first give love, regardless of the results. Love is not barter and you cannot expect everyone you love to love you back. That is not how it works. This aspect is trying to teach you that love is universal, all-encompassing and should be doled out with no strings attached.

You find it difficult to trust people because of past painful experiences, so it takes time for you to take down all your barriers and defenses. You perhaps feel that you are unworthy of love and you cannot think of many reasons why someone should be able to love you. But, that type of thinking is an illusion. You are entitled to as much love as the next person, but love does carry responsibilities. You are worthy of love and there is a lot to love about you, but you must change your attitudes before you can experience the truth of what I have said. People do care about you, but they will tend to leave you alone if they feel that you are trying to shut them out. Open up your emotions and take your chances. It won't kill you, unless you let it. And that would then be your fault.

So, here it is. You need to learn to value and love yourself more and to express your appreciation for others more openly. Not with material gifts, but with honest and true emotion. You have a complex emotional nature and it needs to be examined. You are very loyal and steadfast towards those you love once your emotional needs are understood and that is an admirable trait. You tend to be very serious and responsible in relationships. You may involve yourself with noticeably older or younger partners. Try to be less sensitive and more forgiving when you think a loved one has slighted you. You have a need to feel secure and if you do not, then that tends to throw you for a loop. All manner of negative emotions surface then.

You find it difficult to show love physically. Stop being such a miser with your affections as well as with your possessions. You have a stingy streak in you that does not serve you well. After all, you can't take it with you when you go. So use some of it now in order to spread a little happiness. You may have a tendency to equate having things to having security. This is another illusion. You don't really become less secure by giving away possessions. In fact, the only true wealth you have and retain is that which you give away to others. This is another lesson for you to learn. To end on the bright side, you are a reliable friend who can be trusted.

◾Venus conjunct Uranus

You are excitable, spontaneous, and easily aroused emotionally and sexually. You tend to fall in and out of love very quickly and have little self-restraint or concern for propriety when your feelings have been stirred. You are unique, a bit eccentric and unconventional and you don't mind experimenting. You love and crave excitement, especially in your emotional life. You enjoy the thrill of the chase and you split when things start to get boring. Your strong suit is not in hanging around for the long haul. You prefer non-traditional relationships, ones that give you plenty of freedom and independence as you do not like to feel tied down. You like playing the field and settling down in a permanent, one-to-one relationship may be asking too much from you. In fact, you may intentionally choose partners who are otherwise unavailable because it helps keep things from getting too close and involved. You don't like strings attached to relationships and you prefer to remain rather detached with it all.

You have a highly unusual and explosive emotional nature. You change emotionally as easily as the wind changes direction. You are troubled with the emotional ups and downs which you do not understand and you have the tendency to blame whoever is handy for your emotional lows. The crazy emotional tides which you feel are coming from within and they are because your creativity cannot find a decent outward expression. Use your wonderful creativity ability and your fine intuition in the pursuit of something artistically or musically creative. Then you won't be quite so at the mercy of your erratic emotions.

You have a lot of personal magnetism and sex appeal. Others find you very alluring, exciting and interesting. Being restless by nature, travel would be good for you as it would give you an opportunity to satisfy your curiosity and your wanderlust. Change is necessary for you and one way or another your life will be filled with it. In general, you do not care what people think of you or the ways in which you relate to the world and to others. You will do what you want. You need to exercise self-control over your sensual nature.

◾ Venus sextile Ascendant; Venus Trine Ascendant

You are cheerful, fun-loving, charming, easy-going and have a pleasant personality. You love beauty and harmony and you are happiest when things are going smoothly. You do not like discord and you do not go out of your way to make waves. You may have artistic talent.

◾ Venus sextile Jupiter; Venus trine Jupiter

You are a generous, warm-hearted and open-handed person who shares every resource with others. You give of both yourself and your possessions to those whom you favor, although you will rarely put yourself out too much in order to do so. You enjoy luxury and refinement and you desire to always be in comfortable, elegant surroundings. You hate having to get your hands dirty. You are charming, gracious and charitable and you are the model host or hostess. This aspect brings material good fortune, which has been earned from previous lives. If there is a negative here, then it is your tendency towards self-indulgence, over-extravagance and laziness. Sometimes things come to you so easily that you do not appreciate them. Things are most appreciated if one has to work hard for them. There may be a love of rich, sweet food as well as too much of it, hence a tendency to gain weight. You are a very gentle and social person who loves harmony, beauty and travel. Be careful not to take things too much for granted or take the easy way out.

◾ Venus trine Mars; Venus sextile Mars

You are warmly romantic and openly express your affection, appreciation and love of the opposite sex, though rarely in a crude or insensitive manner. You seem to be a magnet to the opposite sex, regardless of whether most people would classify you as beautiful or attractive, although you may well be. You are simply fun and pleasant to be around and that is why you attract so much attention. You have sex appeal and others like and appreciate your easy-going emotional nature. You like getting people together and if it were up to you, you would have the whole world paired off, living happily ever after.

You have a strong desire for love and beauty and involving yourself in some type of creative activity, whether it be art, music, sculpture or poetry, would help to satisfy this inner craving. This aspect brings a certain charisma and you seem to naturally draw people around you. You like to socialize and are happiest when surrounded by others. You have a great need to give and receive affection from others. You are warm and demonstrative in your affection for others. You are very much alive and others find this very appealing. Fulfillment and harmony in love is likely for you because you know what you want and need in a romantic sense and you express those desires honestly and openly. You have no hidden agendas. You are a non-combative individual who likes peace and serenity. You put a lot of energy into your emotions.

◾ Venus sextile Neptune; Venus trine Neptune

You are a sensitive person with a lot of artistic imagination and a flair for creating beautiful things or environments. You find peace in listening to good music and many times it will be the catalyst for your trips of fantasy. You are romantic and would like to have a story-book kind of life where you live in bliss with your one and only soulmate. These are indeed high ideals, but it's okay for you to dream because at the same time you are dreaming, you are able to keep your feet on the ground and not get carried away by it all. You are compassionate and seek to help others who are in need. You are a natural "giver" and it makes you happy to serve. You want what's best for all concerned and you do not have a problem with your ego getting in the way. You find it difficult to be too assertive as you like peace and harmony, without making waves. You are capable of great sacrifice for those you love and you do not necessarily need to be recognized for that or receive anything in return. You have a mystical side to you and you like being around artistic or mystical people. Church music stirs your soul and is as a breath of fresh air from your true home, the heaven worlds. You may have real talent with music or singing. You are devoted and devotional. You generally root for the underdog and can sometimes be a sucker for a sob story. You will attract people in this lifetime who will help you continue the soul growth you started in previous lives.

◾Venus sextile Pluto; Venus trine Pluto

You put everything you have into your emotions. Because you feel and love so deeply, so passionately and wholeheartedly, others may find your intensity either extremely attractive or very threatening. You are charismatic, with sex appeal and a certain amount of animal magnetism which can't help but be noticed by the opposite sex. You have the ability to use your attractiveness and charm to manipulate others, oftentimes without even realizing it. This aspect gives you the opportunity to transform your values or to be the catalyst to help others transform theirs. There is artistic ability along with a desire to create beauty, harmony and comfort. You have an understanding and an empathy for the problems of others and you are always looking for ways in which to help them or at least find the good that is in them.

◾Venus trine Saturn; Venus sextile Saturn

You are loyal and steadfast in matters of love and affection. The feelings of others are a serious matter to you and you don't play games with people's affections. Fidelity is highly valued and you don't want to settle for less. Security plays an important part in your life and you have a fine enough opinion about yourself and your own self-worth that problems with insecurity don't cause you much aggravation or upset. Still, you are somewhat reserved in showing your affections as you want to be sure you can trust whomever you are involved with. Your tastes and needs are simple and although you appreciate beauty and luxury, you do not need every luxury and convenience in the world in order to be happy. A person's character and inner nature matter more to you than their appearance. Casual or superficial relationships are not what you want and you aren't looking for them. You understand that the best kind of love takes time to develop and real love only gets better, deeper and more satisfying with age. The friendships you form are generally solid and long-lasting. Stability of emotions is one of your hallmarks. You have an innate sense of duty and responsibility towards your loved ones. Self-control is relatively easy for you to practice. You wouldn't be considered a party animal as your outlook on life is a little more serious and reserved than that. Still, others appreciate the fine qualities you have spent lifetimes developing. You have an inborn strength and courage to face life's difficulties.

◾ Venus sextile Uranus; Venus trine Uranus

You are very creative, intuitive, original, outspoken, and open in thought and emotion. You have a magnetic charm and sex appeal that attracts others to you. You enjoy surprises and anything that provides excitement to your life, including your relationships. You are independent and want a good deal of personal freedom in your involvements with others. Your ideas about love and romance are open and progressive and you are willing to try almost anything. You make and are drawn into unusual friendships with unusual sorts of people. Many people come and go into and out of your life and they are all there to test or challenge your values and your ability to change and to be flexible. They somehow fill unique needs within you. Same with friends — they come, but they go out of your life when they no longer fulfill a need. You have quite unusual ways of looking at things and you always seem to come up with clever solutions to the problems that are presented to you. Things happen to you quite suddenly, very much out of the blue. You cannot anticipate these events, you can only merely react to them. This is particularly true with love relationships. You will constantly receive exciting, unusual and unexpected events in your life which are of considerable assistance in your achieving both personal and soul growth.

◾ Venus opposite Ascendant; Venus square Ascendant

You seem to need the approval of others in order to feel good about yourself. You may lack self-assurance and self-confidence. You attract things you need with virtually no effort on your part. You like to be with warm, sociable people. You have a charming and pleasant personality but you may be insincere. There is also a tendency to take things for granted and to be somewhat lazy at times.

◾ Venus opposite Jupiter; Venus square Jupiter

There are many possibilities with this aspect. Perhaps you will try to have a relationship with one who has completely different interests than you. Perhaps your devotion to some pet cause is annoying to the one who is nearest and dearest to you. Or you may be financially wasteful or extravagant, or perhaps bombastic in your appearance. There are tendencies here for self-indulgence and over-extravagance and your love or cravings for rich, sweet food can cause you trouble with your health in the form of circulation and weight problems due to excess. Perhaps you do not value what you own because it has all come too easily. Maybe you never really had to work all that hard to accumulate it, since you seem to have the ability to effortlessly attract most everything you need. The challenge here is to balance your desires for material things with your desires for philosophic ideals. Your values will be called into question and you may need to rearrange your priorities. You have an expansive emotional nature and you have the tendency to become involved with that type of love that is commonly referred to as "blind" love. Perhaps your feelings of love are motivated by considerations of money, property or social status.

But in spite of all that is said above, you are basically a warm-hearted and generous person who will come to the aid of friends if they are in need. People know they can count on your emotional and material help without your judging them in the process. You tolerate and accept other people's shortcomings and this goes a long way in keeping harmony, which is something that is really important to you and necessary for your well-being. At times, though, you avoid confronting difficult issues because you don't want to make waves or upset people's feelings. At times you need to be more self-assertive, though, not only because it is right to stand up for your beliefs but also because your needs have to met in order for you to retain a healthy balance. You are a lover of social situations and you like to be surrounded by people. You know how to handle people and still be liked. Being alone with yourself makes you somewhat uncomfortable. You need to learn self-restraint.

◾ Venus opposite Mars; Venus square Mars

Amongst various possible tendencies are these: Your need to satisfy your own desires before considering other people's needs causes anger and frustration. You suppress your own desires in order to maintain peace, which causes internal conflict within you. Sex and love can cause problems because either you run hot and cold alternately, or you don't know the difference between the two or perhaps you simply have love-hate types of relationships. Your high sex drive can lead you to squander your creative force through sexual excess and sensuality. Perhaps you "fall" into love easily with whoever pays you the slightest bit of attention and affection.

You are intensely amorous and attractive to the opposite sex and are not inclined to simple, friendly platonic relationships. There is a lot of tension in your love life because you often put your own needs ahead of your partner's or you are impatient when it comes to having your own needs met. You tend to run hot and cold in your relationships. If your partner is hot to trot, then you are not, and when you are ready for action, then your partner is not in the mood. You probably find yourself releasing your "hate" through verbal or physical fights when there are differences of opinion with your partner and after your hostility is released, then you once again feel "love" for that person. Of course, while your emotions might be back to normal, you partner is still trying to figure out just what happened and what hit them. You are ready to go again, but they are not and you can't understand why. This can create a great deal of frustration and disappointment that you do not easily shrug off because you cannot understand what the other person's "problem" is. If you are not in a love relationship, then you want to be in one and if you are, then you don't want to be. Your emotions are not stable and you have problems dealing with them. You are indecisive and your values and standards of behavior change from one moment to the next. You need to learn how to compromise with others so that your anger does not erupt when you do not get your way. Blowing off steam is fine, and perhaps you need to buy yourself a punching bag so you can spar with it when you are upset, but it is not right to use other people, especially loved ones, as verbal punching bags or as objects of your assault tactics. Additionally, you need to overcome your feelings of love and hate toward the people you care about.

◾ Venus opposite Neptune; Venus square Neptune

Another facet of this aspect is that you may have such an ideal mate built up in your own imagination that no real person could ever come close to your fantasy. You may spend your entire lifetime looking for Mr. or Ms. Perfect such that you miss Mr. or Ms. Right. You become very disillusioned when you discover that no real, flesh-and-blood person ever quite lives up to your dream image of the perfect mate. Come down to earth and realize that no one is perfect and there are no white knights ready to come dashing along to save you. Stop the dreaming but don't give up the dream. Although you frequently fantasize about love and romance, you may avoid becoming intimately involved with anyone or making definite commitments. You can be evasive and dishonest with yourself and others when it comes to love.

You are a sensitive person who enjoys the finer, aesthetic things in life. You desire harmony and beauty and are probably attracted to the arts in some way, either painting, music, dance, theater or drama. You are perhaps attracted to those with artistic or mystical inclinations. There is a certain charm about you that others find unworldly. The unusual and the intuitive, the sensual and the explorative appeal to you. You are insecure in matters of love. Simply remember that you have human frailty, but do the best you can as that is all the Universe asks of you. Recognize, too, that human weakness exists even in those you love. Sometimes others cannot live up to your expectations, which may be quite unrealistic at times. You may be unrealistic in matters of love. You may believe that if someone loves you enough that they can read your mind. This will set you up for many disappointments because that is just not true. You need to tell people what you want and how you feel. They cannot read your mind no matter how much they love and care about you.

You need to transform your material values into spiritual values and to turn personal desires into universal desires. Personal property and possessions may disappear in strange, mysterious ways in order to teach you that material possessions are easily replaced and therefore are of limited value. The only thing you can take with you when you die are your spiritual and personal growth, your experiences. You need to learn to love without expecting love in return. You must learn to forgive and thus release inner resentments. You need to learn how to turn the other cheek while not becoming a doormat for all to walk on. One last thing, do not turn to drugs or alcohol when you feel sorrow or when you feel like escaping from the world. Life must be faced head-on if you are to get anywhere and resorting to drugs or alcohol will only make things much worse.

◾ Venus opposite Pluto; Venus square Pluto

You are drawn to powerful and compelling emotional and sexual attractions and experiences that you may feel you have little choice or control over. You crave intensity and these incidents provide you with the opportunity to satisfy your wanton desires. You feel an overwhelming need for love and you may be emotionally or sexually greedy, insatiable, obsessive or compulsive. You tend to be very jealous of and possessive of the objects of your desires and although you keep tight reins on your partners, you do not want them to question or control you in any way. This makes for very one-sided types of relationships. You need to become aware that your jealous and possessive traits will drive away those you profess to love. Power struggles are likely in your relationships as you want to wear the pants, yet you continually attract that same sort of person for a partner. Your love life is passionate and often explosive and painful, but you don't seem to mind because the intensity helps make you feel that you are alive.

The challenge here is to transform your values. Important psychological problems are being worked out because of and through your relationships with others. Because of this you may attract people and friends who act destructively towards you. The reason this happens is because these people are mirroring the same type of acts you yourself have done in former lives. You are now reaping what you have sown previously. You are being given the chance to wipe your slate clean if you do not respond to evil with evil. Release all thoughts of revenge and learn to turn the other cheek. When your debts are paid and your lessons are learned, then destructive people will no longer be part of your life. This aspect shows a readiness on your part to atone for past mistakes and cruelties.

In matters of health, this aspect tends to interfere with the magnetic forces in the veins and prevents proper drainage of toxins and waste material from the tissues. It can also hinder the filtering process in the kidneys. This leads to improper cleansing of the blood, with the result that toxins and waste material seek exit through the lungs and skin in the form of lung congestions and skin eruptions. The spiritual lesson here is to let go of ill feelings (emotional toxins) and forgive (elimination, transformation), rather than trying to get even or seeking revenge.

On the positive side, you do have the emotional power and unusual creativity to bring about beneficial and healing changes into the lives of others if you can focus on other's needs instead of your own.

◾ Venus opposite Saturn; Venus square Saturn

Your emotional development may have been delayed or it may simply be inadequate. You find it difficult to be warm and loving towards people because you have been hurt in the past and you fear it may happen again. You are stingy with material resources and with affection. You believe that everything must be earned and paid for — there are no free lunches. Because you find it difficult to express your feelings, you tend to show people how you feel by buying them gifts as a substitute for you and your feelings. If they reject your gift, then this is easier to take than if they reject you. Though you crave love and affection, intimacy is difficult for you. You have a shallow opinion of yourself and your own worth and talents. You do not understand why anyone could possibly love you. You feel that you are unlovable. This is something you need to strongly work on as your life will continue to be miserable if you do not learn to change your attitude. You are as worthy of love as anyone else, but you must come to realize that for yourself. Do not let past experiences govern your actions and feelings for the rest of your life.

You are a serious and reserved person who appears to others as cold, aloof, unfeeling and uncaring. You are not necessarily these things, it's just that you are very cautious in letting anyone see the real you or in letting people get close to you. You want to love and be loved, but you find this very difficult. You need to remember that you first have to give love to get love. And you can't buy real love. It doesn't work that way. You find it difficult to enjoy yourself in a light-hearted, open and playful way. You understand work, duty and responsibility a lot better than you understand feelings, affection and love. Rarely do you do anything for pleasure. If something involves work or getting something done, then that is pleasure for you. Other people do not understand that about you. There are times, though, when you procrastinate and put off attending to necessities with the result that duties tend to pile up. You need to learn how to balance the seriousness with life and the enjoyment of life.

You may become romantically involved with people who do not value you or treat you well. You need to learn to love and value yourself before you will find happiness in love. Security is very important to you, yet you do not know how to feel secure. Your fear of loss, of money, property, loved ones, etc., makes you very insecure. This negativity colors all your relationships for the worse. You must learn how to trust again. You must learn how to face your fears, even if it is painful. This is the only way you will ever overcome them.

You have the tendency to lose your faith and your optimism when life presents problems with which you must cope. It's fine to have a well-developed sense of responsibility, but you must also learn to trust in divine wisdom which has attracted these difficulties to you to help you develop personal and soul growth. You better than most can understand that the purpose of life is not happiness, but experience. Yet that does not mean you have to live your entire life feeling miserable. You may feel lonely, but this is because you are unwilling or unable to see that people really do love you. As I have mentioned previously, the problem may lie in your own opinion of yourself. You must first become a loving person yourself in order to attract love.

You may become defensive about expressing your real likes and dislikes for fear of being criticized or put down. You may have a jealous and possessive streak in you such that when you are in a relationship, you do anything and everything in your power to try to hold on to what you have. Of course this makes your partner feel as though they are in prison and they will try to escape the first chance they get, which is what you are fearful of in the first place. You must realize that you can never hold on to anything that doesn't want to be held on to. Love is free and there should be no contingencies placed upon it. You need to accept the difficulties you experience in life as spiritual lessons. These lessons are attempting to help you establish better values.

◾ Venus opposite Uranus; Venus square Uranus

You are excitable, spontaneous, and easily aroused emotionally and sexually. You crave emotional excitement and you tend to fall in and out of love very quickly, having little self-restraint or concern for propriety when your feelings have been stirred. Relationships begin with sudden, electric attraction, but they often end abruptly. You are unique, a bit eccentric and unconventional in your tastes and you don't mind experimenting. You love adventure, especially in your emotional life. You enjoy the thrill of the chase and you split when things start to get boring. You tend to be faithless in love — your strong suit is not in hanging around for the long haul. You prefer non-traditional relationships, ones that give you plenty of freedom and independence as you do not like to feel tied down. You like playing the field and settling down in a permanent, one-to-one relationship may be asking too much from you. In fact, you may intentionally choose partners who are otherwise unavailable because it helps keep things from getting too close and involved. You don't like strings attached to relationships and you prefer to remain rather detached with it all. There is the possibility of clandestine relationships.

You have a highly unusual and explosive emotional nature. You are temperamental and change emotionally as easily as the wind changes direction. You are troubled with the emotional ups and downs which you don't understand and you have the tendency to blame whoever is handy for your emotional lows. The crazy emotional tides which you feel are coming from within and they are because your creativity cannot find a decent outward expression. Use your wonderful creativity ability and your fine intuition in the pursuit of something artistically or musically creative. Then you won't be quite so at the mercy of your erratic emotions.

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highpriestessarchives · 2 months

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A Philosophy Behind Writer's Block: Valuing Despair

Unfortunately, it happened again where I went a little over a month without writing anything I was happy with. I would attempt to get some words down, remembering that even a little bit is progress; but, no matter what I did, everything just felt so dry and dull. Not only that, my stories felt like they were boring or just not worth it anymore. It was awful.

I tried everything that normally helped with getting over writer’s block. I’d try out different times to write, read other books for inspiration, focus on another hobby—still, it all felt like I was banging on a brick wall. That’s when I turned to my philosophy studies, as if there was some sort of deeper consciousness of an answer that would aid my issues.

Well, there was. The infamous Kierkegaardian Despair.

The Sickness unto Death

The Sickness unto Death is a book written by Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard in 1849 under the pseudonym Anti-Climacus. A work of Christian existentialism, the book is about Kierkegaard’s concept of despair, which he equates with the Christian concept of sin, which he terms “the sin of despair.”

In Kierkegaard's work, despair arises from a fundamental disconnection from one’s true self and from God. He distinguishes between different forms of despair, including the despair of having a self and the despair of not wanting to be oneself.

Now, take what you will from the Christian existentialism part (I’m pagan, so I already had mixed opinions on many classic texts on God), but it doesn’t erase how the concept of despair can shed light on the underlying struggles that writers—at least, myself—may face.

It’s Never Just a Phase

Writer’s block can be seen as a manifestation of existential despair in which we feel disconnected from our creative essence or authentic self. This disconnection may stem from various sources, such as self-doubt, fear of failure, or a sense of alienation from one’s creative impulses. We may experience a profound sense of emptiness or meaninglessness, unable to access the inspiration and clarity needed to write.

Moreover, Kierkegaard’s notion of despair as a failure to align with one’s true self suggests that writer’s block may arise when our creative endeavors are driven by external motives or expectations rather than genuine inner inspiration. The pressure to produce work that meets societal standards or fulfills commercial demands can lead to a sense of existential disorientation and paralysis.

Don’t Just Overcome it. Value it.

If you resonate with Kierkegaard’s work, you will agree with his observation that we are always going to despair over something. It’s not about waiting for the tide to roll over or for the dry spell to ease up, but to examine our own self’s relation to what we are lamenting over. He writes:

“Despair is an aspect of the spirit, it has to do with the eternal in a person. But the eternal is something he cannot be rid of, not in all eternity… If there were nothing eternal in a man, he would simply be unable to despair… Having a self, being a self, is the greatest, the infinite, concession that has been made to man, but also eternity’s claim on him.”

Let’s break down the quote and explore how it can inform our approach to overcoming writer’s block:

Despair as an Aspect of the Spirit: Kierkegaard suggests that despair is not merely a psychological state but an aspect of the spirit, rooted in the eternal dimension of human existence. Kierkegaard’s conception of despair invites us to recognize the creative process as a site of existential tension and struggle.

Writer’s block is not merely a technical or practical obstacle to be overcome but a profound existential challenge that confronts us with the limitations of our finite selves and the aspirations of their creative spirit.

The Eternal in a Person: Kierkegaard asserts that despair is linked to the eternal within individuals, suggesting that it arises from a tension between the finite and the infinite aspects of human nature. The finite aspects encompass the temporal, material, and contingent dimensions of life, while the infinite aspects involve the eternal, transcendent, and spiritual dimensions. This tension is inherent in human consciousness and manifests in various forms of despair, such as the despair of weakness, the despair of defiance, and the despair of not willing to be oneself.

This tension between the finite and the infinite can be understood as the conflict between the limitations of our creative faculties and the boundless possibilities of imagination and expression. Writer’s block often emerges when the writer feels constrained by external pressures, self-doubt, or perfectionism, inhibiting their ability to access the infinite reservoir of creative inspiration within them.

Moreover, Kierkegaard’s concept of the finite and the infinite highlights the paradoxical nature of creativity. While the creative process involves the manipulation of finite materials—words, images, sounds—it also taps into something transcendent and ineffable, something that exceeds the boundaries of ordinary experience. Writer’s block can be seen as a manifestation of our struggle to bridge this gap between the finite and the infinite, to give form to the formless, and to articulate the inarticulable.

Having a Self as Eternity’s Claim: In Kierkegaard’s philosophy, the concept of “having a self” refers to the capacity for self-consciousness, self-reflection, and moral agency that distinguishes human beings from other creatures. It involves the awareness of one’s own existence as a distinct individual with thoughts, feelings, desires, and responsibilities. “Eternity’s claim” suggests that the existence of the self is not merely a temporal or transient phenomenon but is imbued with profound significance that extends beyond the confines of earthly life. The self, according to Kierkegaard, is intimately connected to the eternal dimension of human existence, reflecting the divine spark within each individual.

“Having a self as eternity’s claim” suggests that the act of creative expression is not merely a personal endeavor but is also a manifestation of the eternal striving for meaning and significance. Writers, as self-aware and self-conscious beings, bear a profound responsibility to give voice to their innermost thoughts and feelings, to explore the depths of human experience, and to contribute to the ongoing dialogue of humanity.

Embracing Existential Depth

So how do we value despair and overcome writer’s block in light of Kierkegaard’s insights? Writer’s block often extends beyond mere technical or practical challenges and can be rooted in deeper existential concerns. This involves grappling with questions of identity, purpose, and meaning in the creative process. By recognizing writer’s block as a reflection of these existential concerns, we can approach it as an opportunity for self-exploration and growth. Rather than viewing it solely as a barrier to productivity, we can use writer’s block as a catalyst for deeper introspection and self-discovery. This might involve journaling, meditation, or engaging in conversations with fellow writers or mentors to uncover underlying psychological or philosophical issues that may be contributing to the blockage. I have previously posted a blog on writing soliloquies. Embracing existential depth allows us to transform our struggles into sources of insight and inspiration, ultimately enriching our creative work.

There is a large aspect of accepting what you cannot control, another widely-known philosophical concept. Swimming against the current, after all, may prove to be more tiring than it’s worth. Instead, be kind to yourself and practice self-compassion during these moments. Understand that experiencing creative struggles is a normal part of the writing process and treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a friend facing similar challenges.

Seek social support. Reach out to fellow writers, friends, or mentors for support and encouragement. Sharing your struggles with others can help you gain perspective and feel less isolated in your creative journey, because, trust me, we have all been there.

Ensure that you are also setting realistic goals. All I would want to do was upkeep my 3k word/day momentum, but I would feel even worse about myself for being unable to do so. Break down your writing goals into smaller, more manageable tasks and set realistic deadlines for yourself. Celebrate small victories along the way to maintain motivation.

Finally, what has helped me the most, is to read widely. Immersing myself in diverse genres, styles, and voices provided so much insight into what I could be missing in my own work; or, it simply sparked my love of story-telling all over again.

Closing Words

Remember that writer’s block is a temporary obstacle that can be overcome with patience, persistence, and, apparently, a bit of philosophy. Where there is frustration, we will find insight.

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welcomehomediscordserver · 1 year

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(joking) CW: AGGRESSIVE SUPPORT AND LOVE FOR CLOWN FROM THE MOD TEAM AND MEMBERS OVER AT OUR DISCORD SERVER !!

I have found joy in your little show that I rarely find in things. The overwhelming love and care I have not just for these specific characters but for your art and talent as a whole is astounding. I want you to know that your community, the good parts of it, support you in any endeavor you choose to take. Although this project may have blasted your popularity you are 3-dimensional, you are much more than the creator of welcome home. You are a multi-medial, skilled, talented, and strong artistic being. Throughout all of this I have had nothing but the utmost respect for you. I will continue to no matter what. Just know we over at The Welcome Home discord server have been following your art closely and appreciating every detail! Do what is best for you clown, and continue to do so! -Reggie

It's been a while since something has grabbed me like this... Welcome Home is one of the most precious things I have ever seen, the creation has and will it always have a place in my heart. Thank You creator for sharing this piece of you heart with us. But your safety is more important, I hope that you'll be safe. -Jax

"dear clown, from the heart of one fan to many others, i find so much comfort in your project that i hope that even when things just like now are awful, you know that there's people simultaneously supporting you in every step of the way! We can wait however long you believe is necessary, you deserve to feel respected with your own passion project! And with that to a close, i wish you well! Thank you for giving us a grand welcome home!" -gremints

dear clown, you don't know me. i don't know you either. but everything you've been working on? it's changed my life. and i know that sounds cliche and silly, but it's true. you've inspired me to keep working on my own passion projects, to keep going. because of you, i have found a little community to call home. because of you, i have rekindled my love of silliness and color and creativity. i cannot thank you enough. without you, i would not have found the friends i have now. whatever you do, i want you to know that we're here to support it. and i hope that wherever you go, you also find home. - moth

Hi you dont know me but im Bug, one of the mods^^, I just want to start my message with this, Before I found welcome home, everything for me was going downhill, I had lost so much that was important to me in less than 2 weeks, I couldn't get out of bed and I wasn't doing my favorite things anymore. I couldn't even smile, My eyes were tired and heavy from crying. But thanks to you, Clown. Wonderful you..and your beautiful vibrant creation. With characters I saw and adored right away. I've smiled, danced, sang my favorite songs again, met new and amazing friends & began to draw again. I felt happiness faster than I thought I would again. A peace from your life helped heal some of mine and I'm grateful. Your creations bring me and so many others joy, But even then it as not as important as you. Yes It brings many smiles to people and i hope that doesn't sound to overwhelming.. But although we can't fix the issue people have caused you, we can't apologize for those who don't respect the boundaries you've set and we can't take back what others have done we want you to know that no matter what, the good of the community will always Have what's best for you in mind, in our server we make sure all rules are followed and you're privacy and mental health is respected. Take as much time as you need to take it all in, relax, do what's best for clown. 💚 take care of yourself before aything else. We thank you for all you've done already. -Boogerbug

EVERYTHING BELOW WAS SUBMITTED BY MEMBERS !!

Hi Clown! Just another rando passing through! While I have known about your artwork for a few years now, I never dove into it until Welcome Home became popular, and I genuinely love the vision you have. Your other artwork is also phenominal and genuinely inspires me, and it always has, even before I discovered the Welcome Home website. Your character designs are impeccable, the way you portray the muppets is genuinely awesome and brings back a lot of good memories, as I grew up watching puppet shows. Explains one reason I enjoy your work doesn't it?Despite making godly artwork, people forget that you are a human like the rest of us. Most people who become famous or popular because of something they have done experience this and it is unfortunate, but there are some of us that know you have a life and are already struggling. Take the time you need to rejuvinate yourself and try not to let these people get to you, as hard as it is to do, as even I still struggle with this daily. These are your creations, and you deserve to have control over what happens with them, and the disrespect this slowly growing fanbase has for your requests is terrible. Hoping that things eventually improve on your end, especially since you already aren't in a safe environment, something I also understand. I've already planned on throwing some bucks at you through Ko-Fi once I open my new bank account, and even if I cant, I still want to help prove that you are worthy and deserve better than this. You are incredibly talented and I hope to see Welcome Home and all of your other works of art flourish over time! - Sunnie/Mizo

Now onto the big reveal....

Our server members as well as a few mods all banded to together to create a collage showing our appreciation and support for Clown during these rough times. I hope this can serve as a reminder that despite the shitty people out there, there is a large community who still very much respects and enjoys every aspect of Clowns artwork.

An art collage put together by the moderators with art submitted by members.

Below are more signages as well as the usernames of everyone who participated:

Micah

Maximus

Beans

Wynn

Avery

Global

Vinnzhe

- and lastly, the rest of the welcome home discord server 🩷

@partycoffin

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ariesmoontarot · 1 month

Text

♡Come into the Light♡

This reading is to help you gain clarity on what you aren't seeing, understanding, or accepting.

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘗𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘴:

𝘊𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘏𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘛𝘰 𝘉𝘰𝘰𝘬:

𝘗𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘖𝘯𝘦:

Hey pile one. What you aren’t seeing right now is that things are a bit unstable and you are feeling insecure about your relationships and family life because of a lack of financial support or stability. I see that you are feeling unaccomplished and like you do not have enough of what it takes in some way. Some of you could be feeling insecure about many things. I feel like there is someone who is creative, rational, and idealistic about their endeavors and what they set their mind to and they are someone who is going to help you overcome what you are feeling right now. You might be feeling scared to take action or make any decisions because of your fears and I feel like being impulsive and risky isn’t the way to go about things at this time. If you’ve been feeling very possessive or holding onto control in some way, I feel like the best thing to do is let go and surrender to change. Accept things for what they are in this moment and only focus on what you can control, especially financially & romantically. Be patient and perseverant at this time. I feel like whatever imbalance and instability you are dealing with is only temporary and is going to soon be restored. Learning from your past decisions and choices is going to help you navigate your way making decisions moving forward and you are aware that these old, impulsive, immature ways of doing things isn’t the way to do them forever. I feel like you may be in fear of taking any action or making serious decisions in a situation because of the past, and it’s leaving you feeling indecisive. I see that you’re second guessing your thoughts because things did not go as well before, so you’re trying to listen deeply to how you feel. You are healing from betrayal and a heavy feeling of disappointment for others of you. I feel like listening to others peoples ideas and opinions may help you gain some hindsight over your feelings. You are feeling a little apathetic and unhappy because of secrets or painful realizations you may have had and I feel like you aren’t seeing how your attitude is affecting opportunities you have in this very moment. Things are moving gradually at their own pace and it’s the type of progress that lasts long term. I feel like you are having a hard time seeing how things actually are progressing, I see that it’s because it’s happening in energy first, beneath the surface of what you can physically see. You have to allow yourself to feel open and optimistic. Allow new feelings to flow through you instead of focusing on disappointment and sadness. You are not a failure, and your relationships and goals aren’t going to be the way that they were forever. It’s all about your perception and how you choose to see things, especially when they seem challenging. Ask yourself if the challenge or situation that’s happened is actually negative or if there can be a positive result. Ask yourself if you can find a way to turn the situation into something you can use as fuel and motivation, instead of discouragement. I feel like what you’ve been trying to build and invest your time and energy in is going to pay off soon enough. You may not see it in this moment but it’s happening. Allow yourself to let go of any fear and negative emotions that are weighing you down and keeping you in an unhappy place. You don’t have to be sad forever. You can let go of control and allow things to flow more freely. Allow yourself to be happy even when you feel like you don’t have all the things you want. I feel like for a lot of you, there is a relationship you really want to work out and emotional immaturity is getting in the way of you being able to fully open up and feel confident in this connection. I feel like you’re feeling discouragement because of pain you’ve experienced in terms of love. The best thing to do right now is to keep focusing on moving forward mentally. You don’t have to replay the past in your mind. If you’re focusing on positive things, this will create feelings of optimism and joy rather than wanting to just sit and sulk in your sadness.

Positive things are happening for you, but you have to trust that they are. It is safe to love and be yourself. It may take you time to open up, but trying makes the biggest difference. I feel like the love and joy is going to be reciprocated. Even when you least expect it to be. I also see that in your career positive changes are coming and already happening in this moment. Try to approach things with more excitement and enthusiasm.

𝘗𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘛𝘸𝘰:

Hey pile two. I feel like you want to walk away from something you feel like isn't serving you anymore. You could feel happiness exists elsewhere or that you just aren't happy in this situation. I feel like right now you feel tired and not wanting to fight for what you want anymore. It's this energy of you just giving up and maybe even being a bit non-compliant. I feel like this is because you are holding onto past experiences. Maybe you're feeling stuck in the past, overthinking, and having a hard time moving on from what happened. I feel like there is a truth that was revealed to you a while back and it's something you are still holding onto in this moment. I see you are trying to balance out your energy with more productive things, but it's been difficult for you. You've been pushed to have patience, and I feel like that is good for you right now. Especially because you're working through things you are having a hard time with leaving in the past. There is no need to rush. I see an opportunity is presenting itself to you and this is something you've been wanting for a long time. I feel like this is what you're ready to walk away from, but just when you feel like giving up, I see something happening unexpectedly for you. I feel like for a lot of you, you've been overwhelmed by things that are outside of your control and I feel like an important message for you is to be brave. Have confidence and face these hard times head on. Try your best not to be pessimistic and unenthusiastic. I feel like self-criticism and self-doubt holds you back from growing in the way that you know you need to. Maybe even other people's opinions and what they've done or said to you has gotten the best of you as well. Try your best to block these negative things out and use it to better yourself instead. It's always easier said than done, but you need more compassion towards yourself. Love and nurture you in the ways you love and care for others. For those of you who have been wanting a long-term relationship with someone who is genuine and not super high maintenance, I see this coming in for you. You may love the simple things and being able to just be real with someone and all that materialistic, superficial stuff does not serve you. I feel like some of you met someone unexpectedly and you never knew things would ever go the way they did with them. You may have not even expected to feel as deeply as you do towards them, but you do. Things are a bit of a mystery for you right now, but you are going to be seeing much clearer very soon.

𝘗𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘛𝘩𝘳𝘦𝘦:

Hello pile three! I see multiple people in your energy. I feel like you're carrying this burden right now that feels overwhelming and it could be responsibilities, feelings, literally other people's energy, or whatever could be draining you right now. I see you've been dealing with some trouble in relationships (familial, platonic, romantic), finances, or in terms of your career and work. I feel like you've expressed how overwhelmed and exhausted you are to someone you trust; however, you still feel burnt out. I feel like you're letting go of bad habits, addictions, fears, and anything that keeps you in an egotistical energy. Things feel stagnant and a bit hard to understand right now because there are so many things clouding your perception you don't really know what is good and what isn't or what's temporary or long term. Especially in terms of love and friendships. I feel like you have options or multiple people you are feeling for, and you don't really understand your feelings for them or what they mean. I feel like right now you're just in a phase of your life where you're still figuring out what you need and what's best for you, so of course there are going to be many options and things to choose from generally speaking. Right now, isn't necessarily the time to act on any impulses or emotions. I feel like some of you have been trying to escape your feelings and you may be feeling all over the place emotionally. There is something you are trying to ignore emotionally, and it obviously does not feel good. It could literally be what's draining you. You could be giving time and energy to people who don't benefit you and you know it's time to change, but you ignore it. I feel like this attitude and way of living is not going to benefit you in any way. It could be that you're in your ego and pride is blocking you from accepting how you feel and not resisting it anymore. I feel like you resist it by continuing to do things in order to distract yourself, instead of actually facing it. You have been hurt many times, but you cannot control how you feel by avoiding it. You can only control the way you perceive things, who you allow to influence you, and the decisions you make. Maybe spend time alone, not allowing others to interfere with your growth. You don't have to give yourself to everyone who comes to you. Set emotional boundaries with yourself and others. Things are hard right now, but they won't be forever, this is only temporary. You are not obligated to be there for everyone, even if you love them. Loving can sometimes become detrimental to our own health in draining situations. At times we may feel like our love ties us to a specific thing or person, but be aware that it does not. We must be selective and wise when it comes to who what really invest our time and energy in. Things are going to get better when you allow them to. Have faith and trust that no matter who or what you let go of, life is going to get better. Even if you feel like it could never ever get better for you, it will!!

#spirituality #healing #spiritualjourney #positive vibes #tarot #tarotcommunity #spiritual #love readings #love #pick a card #intuitive reading #love reading #personal healing #tarot reading #pac reading #pac

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