#That’s what Jersey does to a mf

[rooolt]

I appreciate Brian ”Gay Wrongs” Murphy so much. like hes like yes ill help my wife portray thus beautiful lesbian relationship and illustrate an intricately woven teen romance in the middle of war but also the skeleton and the vampire had a messy divorce and jens lyndelle fucks for all the wrong reasons

#How many posts on this blog are me talking about how much I love Murph? #Too many #but he’s my favoritest guy #That’s what Jersey does to a mf #Naddpod #not another d&d podcast #not another dnd podcast #jens lyndelle

[wlwill0w]

When the technology is there me and my gf will get each other pregnant and kill the babies with stones as a blood sacrifice for a million dollars

#what a shift at jersey mikes does to a mf #transfem #:3 #queer #trans #transgender #lesbian #t4t #blood sacrifice #jersey mikes

[devilofthepit]

van has a pride flag hanging up and a pride doormat and a rainbow thing outside her shop this is so cute

#what moving out of new jersey does to a mf #yellowjackets liveblog

[kdsburneraccount]

thinking about the time Beyoncé wore a no. 9 Bengals jersey in 2018

#this was pre burrow so it was a carson palmer jersey (sigh) #one could pretend it was prophetic. i guess. idk why it was worn #like he didn't really like the bengals last time i checked? it could've been 85 (for chad bc hes an icon) but whatever #probably the coolest thing that carson palmer has been involved in #sorry but not really #like when i think abt him i just have this fictional exchange he has w chad #where chad goes whaddup daddy long dick just landed in LA when they reunite in the middle of nowhere (idaho) #and carsons like 1. nobody calls you that 2. we are in idaho (tries to strangle chad) #so chad goes help i've been attacked and carson rolls his eyes so hard he gets a headache and is like <fuck im getting old> #(what being carson palmer does to a mf) and then chad laughs before getting him advil #would love to talk abt them (and their unwellness that i will only slightly embellish fictionally) #the 2000s bengals were an interesting squad (i say not being around during that time) #you got the fruity quirky wr (chad) and the sorta tall awkward golden boy qb in carson (kinda) #(more like suffering from emotional constipation but whatever the 2000s weren’t fun for uptight closet cases like him) #nfl #cincinnati bengals

[queenofallimagines]

Blue Lock boys and having a S/O who has a sex toy collection

A/N: This is extremely self indulgent and came to me while browsing the internet. Part one of 2 and These are also all real toys so if you know exactly what I’m talking about lmao kudos to you✌🏿

Isagi:

- lmao oh boy

- Brand new to this world

- Only has the blue flesh light you got him as a joke for Christmas

- He uses it more often than he’d like to admit…

- So when he comes to your place and he’s in the mood to get nasty

- You gotta hold his hand bc he’s gunna be a little nervous

- You ask him if he’s cool with toys and he’s like ofc

- Very excited to see what you use to make yourself feel good

- Then he is taken aback to see a box of sex toys ORGANIZED BY COLOR

- “We in for a more rough mood today or like a quick thing?”

- “YOU USE THEM FOR DIFFERENT SCENES??”

- Let him take a look through your treasure chest(pun intended)

- And he’s like 🙂 bc how does he use that

- “So whats this?? It’s like flat but it has silicone flowers on the top??”

- “Oh that’s a grinder you strap it to a pillow”

- “….and it’s supposed to be green and blue?”

- “The colors on this one were pretty 😤 aesthetic matters too!”

- Best way is to just dive in and let him test out each one

- His favorite so far is this pretty little one called CLAUDETTE and he likes grinding on it while he kisses you and fucking into it

- Likes how the colors look all funky and fun

- “Is that-“

- “A football colored one yes it is.”

- “…..you didn’t have this before you met me did you?”

- “Listen it’s not MY fault that you be away on games a lot and this just so happened to be in your girth!”

- He will indulge you and do those dick mold cast things and will demand to see videos of you fucking yourself with it when he’s away

- Nothing would make him rush home faster than seeing a video of you moaning all pretty in nothing but a spare jersey of his bounding up and down on an exact replica of his cock begging him to hurry home

- Fuck the game he’s on the first fight back to Japan IMMEDIATELY

- LOVES to use them in punishments!

- When you’re acting all bratty he’ll pretend he’s not on his very last nerve

- Not super good at controlling his true emotions but when he’s calling you pet names making you feel all flustered can you really tell he’s upset?

- So when he flips a switch and tells you to “hold fucking still or I’ll tie your hands to the headboard” and he’s in between your legs holding you down it’s definitely a surprise

- Has one of the vibes that are controlled by phone

- He’s not so cruel as take you for a stroll in public

- (Also he really doesn’t want to get slammed with a public indecency charge because you can’t keep quiet)

- He’ll make you wear it as he goes about his business in the house

- Ignoring you without a care in the world as he’s relaxing on the couch and you’re begging him to bend you over anything

- “Hm? I didn’t hear a ‘I’m sorry for being a brat Yoichi’ so all that crying ain’t doing nothing”

- He has really good control when he’s pissed

- Usually that glassy eyed look while begging him to ruin you would be enough to have him on you like a dog in heat

- Buuuuuy unfortunate for you upset yoichi is some cold

- He’s literally not even flinching as you grind in his thigh making a mess all over his pants

- Rolling his eyes before shooting you the most annoyed look

- “You gunna keep making a mess on my pants or you going to fucking apologize already?”

- “I-I’m sorry Yoichi… please I need you so bad.”

- “Fucking finally.”

- Throws your legs over his shoulders but he’s still mad so he’s gunna edge and then overstimulate you before he even pulls his cock out

Nagi:

- oh he’s so silly

- Like he’s definitely like??

- Probably accidentally finds your stash before YOU show him

- “Oi, what’s this thing over here?”

- And you walk in and he’s messing w a silicone octopus cockring

- Boy if you don’t stay out my mf closet-

- Wants you to show him all the cool weird stuff you have

- “How do you even use this?”

- “Like any other toy???”

- “This tentacle is NOT like a regular sex toy.”

- Does it again by laying down on some of your stuffies and sees one w a obvious zipper

- Opens it to see a dildo inside

- “Why is this IN here?”

- “So nosey mfs like YOU don’t just come in my room and find my shit.”

- “…..that’s fair.”

- His fav for you to use on him is this gold and grey silicone stroker that has skin like texture

- When he’s too lazy to move he likes you being on top of him kissing and biting his neck while you slowly move the toy on his cock

- Will have him squirming and moaning loud as hell like you’ve never seen before

- Nagi isn’t the most vocal but he’s moaning like a pornstar

- “Ohhhh fuuuck pretty keep stroking me like that.”

- No better way to get him to fuck you like you want then to slow stroke him with a fleshlight or stroker

- Asks you to make a cast of your pussy

- When you actually make him one it’s like never brought up again until one night you get a text around 2am a few hours before nagi is set to touchdown back in Japan

- Of him fucking it like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do

- Not sure who the fuck recorded that for him🤨 bc it’s too good and so are the angles to be a shaky one handed quick video

- Moans about how he can’t wait to feel you cream on his cock

- As the most obscene noises play from your speakers with the image of seishiro fucking into a fleshlight of your likeness all messy with lube and cum

- From the way the video starts off he had to have been at it for a while already

- You catch a glimpse of his hazy eyes as he’s mercilessly pounding into the toy

- When the video ends you get another text from him

- ‘Just got out the airport be home in 25’

Hiori:

- you’d think he’d be like weirded out

- Or confused

- Nah

- He’s seen all the gamer porn there is to see

- Monster and fantasy themed sex toys are a walk in the park

- “Woah, they like make dragon dicks that you can actually ride?”

- Favorites are Ophiuchus the Forgotten, Spyro Slim, and the twilight Moon

- He likes textures so anything with more ridges and bumps the better!

- Likes ones that seem normal. He’s a sneaky fucker so hidden in plain sight is great

- Like oh you thought this was a regular lipstick? Nope! A bullet vibe

- Has like 6 of these in your purse at all times

- Annoying as will pull a “hey can I talk to ya for a sec?”

- And then lead you into a secluded area and shove a toy in you while having his mouth do the heavy lifting

- “Mmm~ taste better when you’re this scared.”

- Someone get his ass 🙄😒

- Let’s you fuck him but like you’re a service top at most

- Not very try willing to give up power because that means he looses the game

- Will tie you up and ride you

- Puts on his most slutty performance and really lets himself get whiny

- As soon as he unties you it’s a chance to get him

- Like oh so anyway we’re not done🥰 now you can’t touch

- Will send you links to stores asking you what you think

- “Check out this dark souls one”

- “Yo, baby who the FUCK is that going to fit inside”

- “:((( but it glows in the dark”

#my writing #x black reader #blue lock #bllk #bllk x reader #bllk scenarios #bllk smut #hiori yo #hiori yo x reader #isagi yoichi #isagi x reader #isagi smut #nsft #nagi x reader #nagi seishiro #nagi seishiro x reader #blue lock smut #blue lock headcanons #anime who asked for rin and Sea I got you next!

[stawpny]

more ny/ca hc’s, as another treat for you heathens

- I feel like Yorks that type of guy who would give cal his umbrella like if it was pouring in NYC, since I’ve heard it doesn’t rain in California. He would just stand there, watching Cal be obsessed with this city while he’s fucking drenched, but who cares? If Cal’s happy then he’s mildly content. He’s a wet angry cat in NYC.

-New York used to sit in the Northeast area between Mass and Jersey, but ever since he’s fell in love with the golden boy, he sits right next to him. He had to kick Oregon out of the seat though, and also forced everyone to move over a chair. Cal was clueless.

-York loves sitting ontop of skyscrapers in NYC. He finds it calm and peaceful up there. Cal, not so much. He just usually plays with the pigeons that nest up there to calm his nerves.

-I deadass believe York feeds the pigeons, and when they all flock up around him, eating all of the food, he just snatches one and adds it to his collection. Rats too.

-this adorable mf can only sleep with Cal by his side or he will panic and stay up the whole night. He needs his glowing golden boy, his nightlight 😭.

-Cal calls York when he misses him, and york always answers to reassure him that he could live without him. Cal gets upset and says it’s not true, hangs up the phone out of anger, then totally forget about the situation and call him back to say he misses him again. Cycle repeats.

-York smiles every time Cal does something stupid. Not a smirk, nor a grin, a full blown smile, which is weird for him. Don’t tell York that Cal sometimes does it on purpose to make his partner smile and laugh.

-(not CA/NY) I swear Gov has a board for each and everyone of the states that have OLD pictures of them and adds the most recent one and the oldest one. He changes it every time they get a new look.

-California is a helicopter mom. New Yorks like that dad who is there for you but doesn’t give a shit what you do outside. He might even join you.

Songs I think represent this ship:

Somethin’ Stupid by Frank Sinatra (Both)

Delicate by Taylor Swift (both)

From the Start by Laufey (CA pov)

Hell N Back by Bakar (I can’t decide)

VALENTINE BY LAUFEY (THIS ONE) (NY pov cause he’s new to this kinda stuff)

Paper Rings by Taylor Swift (CA POV)

Mastermind by Taylor Swift (NY POV)

Wonderland by Taylor Swift (both maybe)

Maroon/Paris also by Taylor Swift (I don’t know honestly 😭)

—

they’re so silly

I had to stop with the songs there or I would start connecting songs to them even if it was only one lyric that sounded like them in that song

im sick rn.

I was forced to take a covid test and I now have Covid?? I dunno the test expired in February 😭

anyways, I hope u liked them

ILY byeee!!

#wttt new york #wttsh #welcome to the statehouse #wttsh new york #wttt headcanons #wttt california #wttt shipping #wttsh headcanons #wttt #wttt gov #wttsh gov #wttt caliyork #the sillies are back ⁉️⁉️

[cleostoohot]

So as y’all know I did the 3 days or less challenge along with my ROE technique. Well the 3 days are over and here are my results <3 (I’m feeling pink today)

ᥫ᭡ | MY CRUSH TO TALK TO ME MORE (less than 24h)

Little back story: We were always partners in Spanish class because of our seating chart. He was literally the finest boy I seen in a long time whew😮‍💨. Chocolate skin, tall, he wasn’t the best in basketball but his sexc lips made up for that. We had each others number incase we wanted to exchange work but never texted on some friends shit until Friday. He randomly just hmu saying “yo” & tried to act like he didn’t know who number he was hitting but nahhh boy you know what you doing lolllll. We ended up just joking and reminiscing about school moments & I told him I’m taking culinary class again next year and he said he want me to cook for him 🌚 it never gave personal chef but I damn sure said I would lmfao

My main affirmations:

“Regardless of everything SP always finds a way to talk to me”

“Regardless of everything SP is always communicating with me”

“Regardless of everything SP loves talking to me”

ᥫ᭡ | RESEMBLING MY DESIRED FACE (more everyday)

I’m not going to say who my desired face is since I’m basically gonna end up looking like her completely (but 10x better). But since I wanted to resemble her like 50%, I had an idea of how that was going to look and I look exactly like that now. She has doe eyes and my eyes got rounder, her chin is kinda sorta boxy and mines got more squared, my lips got got bigger and wider and my nose is more pointy. I also love the way her mouth moves when she talks and my mouth has been moving the same. Plus when I talk mostly my bottom teeth would show but now you can see more of my top teeth like hers. I’ve only been around family since school been out and none of them knows who my df is (she’s only has over 100k on TikTok) so I’m guessing that’s why nobody said I look like her but my sister definitely said every morning I look different.

My main affirmations:

“Regardless of everything I be looking like DF”

“Regardless of everything me and DF look alike”

ᥫ᭡ | MY DAD GIVING ME MONEY OUT OF THE BLUE (2 days)

I’m going to visit New York and New Jersey in 2 weeks and what I look like spending my own money? My mom asked my dad to give me money for clothes, food, and just spending money but for some reason he acted like he didn’t want to. But, he ended up sending my mom 500 DOLLARS for me and said he might give me more when the trip comes closer. As you should mf. The hell.

My main affirmations:

“Regardless of everything my dad always gives me money”

“Regardless of everything I always receive money out of the blue”

ᥫ᭡ | RED VELVET CHEESECAKE (2 days)

Me and my sister was walking to Starbucks (and btw it was my first time having a drink from there! i got this drink i seen on Pinterest shit was so good i damn near chewed the cup). Anyways, otw there it was literally somebody selling cake pops. He has so many flavors but guess which one in particular he had… red motha fuckin velvet cheesecake!! My sister thought it was sus that some random man was selling cake pops so she wasn’t gonna get it at first but I KNEW it was my manifestation and that it was safe so I insisted. He actually gave us each one free (pretty privilege maybe 😗) but it was 100000/10 so we bought 4 more each lmfaooo.

funny side note: those cake pops been on my mind since i had them so i tried to make my own today and they’re not doing so good lmfao. but hopefully the last step will bring it all together idk🌚

My main affirmations:

“Regardless of everything I always get red velvet cheesecake”

“Regardless of everything I have red velvet cheesecake right now”

ᥫ᭡ | LOSING 5LBS (3 days)

There’s no story behind this one. I just lost weight lol. I mostly affirmed when I was eating. Before I was 133.?lbs and now I’m 126.2lbs. I didn’t check my weight until the 3rd day so idk which day it manifested exactly but that doesn’t matter fr.

My main affirmations:

“Regardless of everything I always lose weight”

“Regardless of everything I lost 5lbs”

“Regardless of everything food doesn’t make me gain weight”

#law of assumption #manifesation #manifesting #neville goddard #success story

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

Really long headcanon post for the stuff that I’ve posted on Wattpad :3

Massachusetts:

-Mans is my height, 5'6, and he hates being bullied about being the shortest of his brothers lmao

-Is twins with New Jersey, though Jersey makes fun of him cuz he's five minutes younger

-he has reddish brown shoulder-length wavy hair and hazel eyes

-mf is built like the Dwayne Johnson though he's just missing the height

-TRANSMASC MASS SUPREMACY 🛐🛐

-this man acts all tough until the cramps come along. Then he's dead.

-doctor of the statehouse, along with Texas. He deals with sickness/illness whilst Texas deals with injuries. Though he can do both cuz we love that.

-tried learning how to make flower crowns cuz NY would always make them for everyone when they were younger. He tried his best, and he's actually kinda okay at it, so him and any will just hang out and make flower crowns.

-^he has put a spell on every single flower crown that he's ever given or received so that they never shrivel up and die

-OCD, autism, and ADHD

-loves rock, metal, and punk music. Especially FFDP (THEY HAVE NO BUSINESS BEING THAT FRICKIN' GOOD LIKE WHAT-)

-friends with the OG13 (no dip Sherlock-), Maine, Texas, and Louisiana.

-REFUSES TO ADMIT HE HAS A SOFT SPOT FOR NEW YORK. EVEN IF HE'S ACTIVELY HUGGING HIM. HE WILL DENY IT TILL THE DAY HE DIES. HE WILL DO ANYTHING FOR THIS DAMN KID.

-^the moment he met New York, he was filled with the urge to take him away from England immediately. He does pick favorite brothers btw. And it's New York.

-sharp lil canines like he's a friggin vampire smh

Sippi:

-he is a squishy boy and we love that <3 it just makes him better for cuddling

-he's not short, not tall, he's only 5'8.

-he's a pathetic loser tbh but we still love him

-sippi loves stuffed animals, but his favorite is a teddy bear that was given to him by New York (fun fact, teddy bears were invented in Brooklyn, and were named after the president that refused to shoot a bear!).

-he named it Mr. Cuddles, and it is the most beat up stuffed animal that he owns (as in, its ear had to be sewn back on, one of its eyes has been replaced by a button, and it has random stitches and patches all over) but he still loves it and cherishes it to this day.

-friends with (omg he has friends????) Texas, Louisiana, Florida, New York, South Carolina and Georgia

-yes yes he is but a cuddly marshmallow. Until you hurt someone he loves. Then you're dead.

-he SCREAMS whenever there's a bug. Strangely though, he likes ants, moths, and butterflies.

-mans is colorblind

-he doesn't like his squishy-ness and has tried to starve himself on numerous occasions :(

-I think that the fact that he's been owned by 3 different countries is grounds to give him abandonment issues right? Okay.

-if it weren't for his friends just simply existing, he would've been long gone by now. (same tho- I mean what?)

-I'm not gonna say he's hurt himself before, but I'm not gonna say he hasn't either 👁️👁️

-bro thinks that anybody he gets close to is gonna leave him :[

-if he gets hurt, he's not gonna bother telling anyone cuz he doesn't wanna feel like a failure for not being able to defend himself

Texas:

-this man is T A L L- he's 6'5 (not as tall as Alaska though so HA-)

-I imagine him to be very slim and fit, but he has a tiny bit of pudge around his lower stomach and hips and thighs.

-he LOVES animals so, so much. More than humans tbh.

-he has a horse (Ranger), 5 dogs (Rosco, Daisy, Cassy, Billie, and Maria. Rosco and Cassy are German Shepherds, Daisy and Billie are heelers, and Maria is a demonic chihuahua), 3 cats (Mittens, Sassy, and Milo), and 2 snakes (Spot and Harvey).

-^thats just at the statehouse. Back home, he has an animal sanctuary where he takes care of animals, takes them in, nurses them back to health, ect... It's very adorable and I love it.

-speaking of animals, he cannot, I repeat, CANNOT keep it together if an animal dies or gets hurt in a movie. Homeward Bound? Mans was not okay. Hachi? He wasn't ballin', he was bawling 😔.

-I BELIEVE IN TRANSMASC TEXAS SUPREMACY 🛐

-he still wears a binder cuz he doesn't trust the doctors to perform top surgery on him.

-ADHD for DAYS- don't give him an energy drink unless you want a 6'5 chihuahua on cocaine to be following you around.

-ADHD, autism, ocd, depression, anxiety, and ptsd. Idk if daddy issues counts, but he has those for sure.

-this bitch has fallen off of so many things that he no longer takes fall damage

-Mexico was such an asshole to poor Texas...... I wanna skin him alive :)

-Texas CANNOT handle someone raising their hand or voice at him. He can't. He will flinch and/or cry. Which he hates. Cuz he's supposed to have this reputation as the big strong Lone Star State.

-he has SH scars on his wrists, sides, and thighs. They vary from blade marks, to cigarette burns, to even scratches.

-he hates all of his scars so, so much and sees them as nothing but a sign of his weakness and inability to defend himself.

-Texas is also kinda insecure about the little bit of pudge on his lower belly, hips, and thighs. What makes it worse is that he can't really help it. Especially the stomach pudge cuz that's just where his uterus is. Does he know this? Yes. Is he still insecure? Yes.

-he often binds too long or forgets that he has his binder on until it's too late and there is severe bruising and even minor bleeding underneath the band. Along with breathing difficulties.

-^to make the breathing difficulties thing worse, he has asthma :)

——————

#welcome to the table #welcome to the statehouse #ben brainard #wttt #wttsh #wttt massachusetts #wttsh massachusetts #wttt mississippi #wttsh mississippi #wttt texas #wttsh texas

[ff7-has-taken-me-over]

(Au where Daniel comes to West Valley a year or two before he does in the movie)

After the beach the guys give Daniel a chance because he’s stubborn as shit and they find he’s not into Ali. Not even into girls but that’s nothing new around their part of the country. They find he’s actually really funny and annoyingly nice and loyal. Daniel gets so fucking worked up and angry when people say shit about them, even if it is true and the guys find it both amusing and kinda nice to have another one of them.

Daniel sort of becomes the baby of the group, both because he’s the youngest (both in age and in terms of being apart of their group) and because the guys all think he’s adorable. Not that they tell him or each other that, because that’s kinda gay.

It’s not until there’s this match, they’re all competing and Daniel’s there to cheer them on. He didn’t have much interest in participating but he enjoyed watching the guys compete, found it fun and liked the post victory high they all held.

Johnny wins (again) but Dutch comes second this year and he’s absolutely glowing with pride. He usually gets disqualified after round 2, too hopped up on adrenaline and ready to fight anything that breathes funny.

The guys all come out to the parking lot, looking for Daniel so they can all head to their favourite diner and celebrate. Thoughts came to an abrupt stop when they find him in the parking lot, leaning against Johnny’s car with a scowl and some big guy from the tournament standing in front of him. He’s got his arms crossed, the guy leaning with one arm up by his head while the other keeps trying to tug at Daniel’s arm.

The Jersey kid keeps pulling away, glaring as he says something or other. The big guy laughs, hand coming up to cup Daniel’s cheek.

The guys don’t need to know what happens next since their all running forward. Dutch is the fastest and loudest, pulling the guys attention toward them before he’s tackling him to the ground. Daniel’s eyes go wide but he doesn’t get the chance to react much, Tommy and Bobby coming up to him and dragging him away as Johnny, Dutch and Jimmy square off with the guy.

So maybe they care for Daniel a little more than they were willing to admit to themselves. And maybe Daniel’s been crushing on them since he met them all a year ago. And maybe they all turn out to be a bunch of possessive, jealous assholes when literally anyone tries hitting on their baby. And maybe! They take him home to Johnny’s (cause the guys parents are gone again) and take their turns and their sweet ass times showing him exactly who he belongs to now that they’ve gotten their heads out of their asses.

Daniel shows up to school Monday, limping like a mf, sporting a shit ton of hickies (some of them just barely hidden under his clothes) and with the widest smile anyone has ever seen on him. The Cobras don’t really act any different, nor does Daniel honestly, but everybody knows there’s a change in their dynamic.

It’s in the way Dutch gives up his food even though he’s the most possessive over it. It’s how Bobby smiles at the mere mention of Daniel. How Tommy snuggles in close to Daniel in the halls or at lunch. How Jimmy quiets near instantly when Daniel places a hand on his arm or smiles his way. How Johnny hovers constantly and glares at everyone who looks a moment too long.

Even Daniel has changed around them. He’s a little softer (more tame some would even dare say) has these little tells with each Cobra Kai member to get them to do whatever he wants. It’s kinda adorable to see the baddest kids in school wrapped around his little finger.

#fic prompt #prompt #fic #karate kid #cobra kai #80's lawrusso #lawrusso #cobra kai x daniel #johnny lawrence #bobby brown #dutch karate kid #jimmy karate kid #tommy karate kid #daniel larusso #au #the cobras bring daniel in #and then proceed to fall head over heels for him #soft cobras #soft daniel #to a degree #they'll still fuck someone up if they want #reverse harem #they're a bunch of idiots

[hibiscuslynx]

hi it’s me again. (the anon who said i liked seeing you on my dash) i love hockey and baseball (really any sport atp), and have noticed you do as well, so do you have any New Jersey and New York sports headcanons?

HI! WELCOME BACK! AND OH BROTHER (or sibling/sister) DO I EVER !!!!!!

when that hudson river rivalry hits >>>>>>>>>>>>>

devils/rangers rivalry goes fucking crazzyyyyy in the statehouse yeah its not buffalo but tables are still being broken alright. noses too. you shouldve SEEN the shit that hudson river rivalry was getting up to in the 2010s . nj/ny r the same fucking way btw. fighting ur long-esteemed rival every time your teams meet >>>>>>>>>. i like to think this extends to devils/islanders and devils/sabres matches too bc thats all still new york even tho the rivalry isnt as strong there in the actual sport but i want these goofers to have fun soooo. i say they get really into those matches too. they use sports as a way to ✨bond✨ even though they would kill me if i said that.

nj does not have a baseball team so i imagine he isnt the biggest baseball fan in the world. definitely a hockey, football, and (college) basketball guy to me. new york, on the other hand, may quite possibly be the biggest baseball fan you have ever seen.

did you guys know. that the new york jets and the new york giants play in the same stadium. THE SAME STADIUM!!!! they literally live in the same fucking house. thats crazy. and you know where that stadium is? IN NEW JERSEY. new york is just leeching off of new jersey atp. maybe thats why he’s such a ride or die for the bills actually bc its the one team he has that actually you know is in new york.

i also think they actually play sports yk . the NE has some damn good hockey matches . nj & ny both play forward, nj more of a gritty(ha) fiery guy who does the tough work and quite frankly a little bit of a pest. likes to get under your skin. sneaky good shot. winger, plays either side. ny, on the other hand, is a two-way forward, center, plays damn good defensive and offensive hockey, can double as an offensive defenseman too. u can find him all over the ice, in the right spots, doing what he needs to be doing. not known for his hits but lays good ones.

they also play football too !! i know jackshit about football though so i could not tell you what positions they play. all i know is quarterback 😭 is it basic of me to say ny quarterback? who knows. i dont!

looping back to hockey. theyre both diehard proponents that you should not take fighting out of hockey . mfs r projecting over here. new jersey threatens suicide every time his team does badly. he alternates between being mad at his team for sucking and then muttering “im gonna fucking kill myself” afterwards. (i know you didnt ask abt PA but he does the same. there’s this tweet thats like ‘every person ive ever met from philadelphia is a lovely person who casually expresses suicidal ideation within 2 minutes of talking anout their sports team’ and its the funniest thing in the world to me. does this tie into new jersey hcs? technically, yes, bc i hc theyre brothers ^_^ enough of that tangent) new york does not do that . i just dont feel like hes that kinda guy! he is very passionate about his teams tho. they both are tbh!

this is kind of all over the place but i hope you enjoy anon ^_^ and anyone who happens to read this. this is mostly about hockey SORRY thats what i know and love LMAO

#lynx rambles #wttt hockeyposting #asks #suicide joke #<- idk if i need to tag that but better safe than sorry #i dont watch baseball at all tbh. but the dodgers just landed ohtani and i dunno guys i may have to tune in #i just find baseball boring but shhhh #big devils fan. loathe the rangers. dislike the islanders. sabres are the only valid ny team #wttt new jersey #wttt new york #<- I ALMOST FORGOT THEIR TAGS LMAO #i would also like to add that if gov was into sports he would threaten suicide everytime his team did bad too #(un)fortunately i dont hc him as really into sports because i think it would actually kill him #he’s a casual fan. but he’s also got that philly blood in him so #District & IDC are SUPER into sports on the other hand #mmm thinkin bout caps/pens rivalry. district & pa . rahhhh

[heyyallitsbeth]

What the fuck is up with New Jersey in horror?

We have our own cryptid, and every fuvking slasher villain is from here.

Friday the 13th? Camp Crystal lake is a real place here in Jersey.

Halloween? Haddonfield is a real place in Jersey.

Nightmare on Elm Street? I’m like 70% sure Badham is also in Jersey.

Basically: what Jersey does to a mf:

#horror #nj #New Jersey #jason voorhees #michael myers

[wlwill0w]

Closing so horrible I'd rather sit in this damn freezer

#what a shift at jersey mikes does to a mf #jersey mikes #transfem #:3 #queer #trans #transgender #lesbian #wageslave

[jerseymuppet]

Love when all the streams are ass quality but we still pass around impressionist paintings of our weed smoking gfs, what new jersey pussy does to a mf

#we all down bad #my chemical romance #mcr #mcr return #gerard way #ray toro #frank iero #mikey way #jude.txt

[panicatthesocialmedia]

any music recommendations?

I‘m glad to you asked.

I was intact tempted to send you my 250k utterly specific playlists that have the weirdest names, but instead I handpicked a few that just won‘t get out of my head.

Welcome to the colour of my Rainbow eerrr music taste post.

(If I am a good girl I might even add playable audios to this or whatever... so yeah Click the song title to be redirected to THE YouTube)

• Intergalactic by the Beastie Boys or „How to make people go crazy while you wobble on the floor bc this slaps“

• Young and Doomed by Frank Iero and The Future Violents or „Oh wow the second one already is by the jersey motherfukxer gremlin“

• Honey by Halsey or „How does that godesss write amazing songs without intending to write an actual song“

• Hollywood by Lewis Capaldi or „why does this hit into the feels, but not like the others?“

• Le parole lontane by Måneskin or „the band that has the intention to make everyone horny“

• Dasher by Gerard Way or „the story behind this song makes my wanna pick their brain and eat a piece“/„oh look a mother jersey motherfukxer“

• Vampire Money by My Chemical Romance or „The song by the Jersey motherfukxers that makes me go wild immediately and dance like a mf”

• Back and White by Niall Horan or “do I wanna dance or happily cry in a corner?”

• Impossible by Nothing but Thieves or “Will I ever get over this stupid song?”

• charity by YUNGBLUD or “why does this speak the truth?”

• Wildflower by 5 Seconds of Summer or “sending horny vibes”

• Again by grandson & Zero 9:36 or “can I eat this song?”

• All Star by Smash Mouth or “no, don’t ask - I have no clue”

• Blood // Water by grandson or “why do I walkways turn back to this song?”

• Bloodline by Luke Hemmings or “Softly whispering feels, that stab you 100%”

• Break My Stride by Matthew Wilder or “yeah idk”

• Bury Me Face Down by grandson or “JuSt dO IT”

• Centerfold by The J. Grips Band or “this slaps”

• Champagne Supernova by Oasis or “do all heur. Songs basically sound the same but somehow still slap?”

• Changes by David Bowie or “did she once saw this song performed by ballet dancers and since then it’s meaning has exploded to level 10001?”

• Creep by Radiohead or “does she know other Radiohead songs?”

• Dear Maria, Count Me In by All Time Low or “ I got your picture, I’m coming with you”

• die without u by LØLØ or “sometimes I wish I could bury you alive”

• Encore 2: One Day More by The Les Miserables 10th Anniversary cast or “why does my leg hair stand up?”

• Everybody Talks by Neon Trees or “One hit wonder?”

• Fluorescent Adolescent by Arctic Monkeys or “Why is this not a candle name?”

• Footloose by Kenny Loggins or “Yes I’m queer leave me alone”

• Four Letter Words by K.Flay or “Yes”

• How the World Works by Bo Burnham or “why isn’t this played for educational purposes in school?”

• I’m with You by Avril Lavigne or “how does this still slap like the first time listening to it?”

• Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls or “*cries*”

• Kein Liebeslied by Kraftklub or “I’m dumb”

• Killer Queen by Queen or “should this be played at my funeral”

• Kokomo by The Beach Boys or “ja”

• Lemon Tree by Fool’s Garden or “wait that’s a German artist and I like it?”

• Love race by Machine Gun Kelly feat. Kellin Quinn or “what?”

• Parasite Eve by Bring Me The Horizon or “??? Oh ya!”

• Violence by Frank Iero and the Future Violents or “can someone tattoo the guitar intro into my fucking brain?”

• Take it Easy by the Eagles or “this should be my mantra”

• I Was Made for Lovin’You by Kiss or “This goes to my blorbos”

• Summer of ‘69 by Bryan Adams or “I wasn’t even born yet”

• Africa by Toto or “is this a choir song made to be sung by entire stadiums?”

• Paranoid by Black Sabbath or “can you help me occupy my brain?”

• Smoke on the Water by Deep Purple or “another guitar intro to tattoo on my brain”

• The Boys Are Back in Town by Thin Lizzy or “oh boy”

• Paint it Black by The Rolling Stones or “Just Paint it all Black Mf”

• Smooth Criminal performed by Alien Ant Farm or “yes they were right this song is rad and screamed reeeedo me”

• Bulls on Parade by Rage Against the Machine or “have ya read the lyrics?”

• Love Buzz by Nirvana or “shit”

• What’s Up? by 4 Non Blondes or “this just has to be included motherfuckers”

• Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley or “let’s not just do it for the memes”

• Time In a Bottle by Jim Croce or “ohhhh”

• If I Could See the World (Through the Eyes of a Child) by Patsy Cline or “I wish”

• I’m Still Standing by Elton John or “get up cowards and dance bc yes you are still standing”

• Hooked On a Feeling by Blue Swede or “nah not that angelic voice Swede from the gay pirate show”

• Everybody wants to Rule the World by Tears for Fears or “nothing ever lasts forever”

• Go Your Own Way by Fleetwood Mac or “just play it mf”

• Burnin’ for You by Blue Öyster Cult or “these names are so cool lol”

• December, 1963 (Oh, What a Night) by The Four Seasons or “is that a hotel or a garden centre?”

• Sweet Emotion by Aerosmith or “they just know how it goes”

• Kickstart my Heart by Mötley Crüe or “this name is fraught out of a fantasy novel and they just found out about dots over letters”

• 9 To 5 by Dolly Parton or “idk I can’t explain why this slaps so hard but it does”

• Wanted Dead or Alive by Bon Jovi or “yes”

• Tainted Love by Soft Cell or “yes yes”

• That’s All by Genesis or “it’s always the same”

• You Shook me All Night Long by AC/DC or “are they sure it isn’t AD/AC?”

• Life is a Highway by Rascal Flatts or “yes this is the Car soundtrack”

• Dancing Queen by ABBA or “all their songs slap let’s be real so why not choose the one everyone knows?”

• Girls Just Want to Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper or “it’s the truth!”

• (Don’t Fear) The Reaper by Blue Öyster Cult or “Romeo and Juliet”

• On my Way by Phil Collins or “brother bear soundtrack”

• I’m on Fire by Bruce Springsteen or “🔥”

• I Won’t Back Down by Tom Petty or “pep talk”

• Major Tom (Völlig Losgelöst) by Peter Schilling or “why didn’t they use the og version, but instead the one translated for the masses”

• Deutsche Bahn by Wise Guys

• Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd or “did I miss a nyrd”

• Drift Away by Dobie Gray or “if you don’t think this slaps unfollow me”

• September by Earth, Wind & Fire or “🔥”

• What a Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong or “this was my grannies fave”

• Make it Stop (September’s Children) by Rise Against

• Nothin’ But a Good Time by Poison

• Fade into You by Mazzy Star ⭐️

• The Whole “Bein Dead” Thing from Beetlejuice

• Desolation Row performed by My Chemical Romance

• Ambulance by My Chemical Romance

• Letters to The Lost by COUNTERFEIT.

• Midnight by Creeper

• Cyanide by Creeper

• Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash

• Foundations of Decay by My Chemical Romance or "the jersey motherfuckers are back in town"

• I Walk the Line by Johnny Cash

• Fire Away by Chris Stapleton

• Stranger by Jesper Munk

• Self Esteem by The Offspring

• Heaven Help Us by My Chemical Romance

• Sabotage by the Beastie Boys or “Start and Finish line”

I know this might seem excessive, but I couldn’t cut it down further. And I cut it down like A LOT. Basically all the songs by the each of the jersey motherfukxers had to go. And then I had to cut it down even further and it’s still a long list lol.

#music recommendation #song recommendation #music #I'm such a stupid bitch I swear ... #I hate this soooo much #this took sooooo long so if you do not appreciate this I will eat you alive #mood #I'm a stupid cow #If Any of the links does not work or is the wrong one hit me up I'm tired as fuck

[kguhle]

alright y’all what do you buy your mom for her birthday when she continuously tells you she doesn’t want anything

#i’ve been considering a leafs jersey bc mfs a big fan #what are some of y’all’s go tos?? #or what does your mom love to get

[maizumis]

— HAIKYUU BOYS AND MAKE OUT SESSIONS

ft. timeskip!iwaizumi hajime, osamu miya, bokuto koutaro, suna rintaro, atsumu miya

note: fem!Reader and suggestive‼️y'all I'm not sorry, thanks to @shoyotime for talking me about a morning make out with iwa, also finally a post to get out of the baby fever <3

#IWAIZUMI HAJIME

— istg mans can't keep his hand for himself, make outs with hajime could be slow and sensual or super rough full of need. he needs to feel you, his mind is just in you. when is slow and pretty he will make sure to make you feel loved and appreciated because that's what he feels from you but when is not... expect mans to pick you up by your legs and push your back to the nearest wall he has in sight

his hands holding both your legs, arms muscles flexing so you wouldn't fall "fuck, I love you so much" it came more breather and desperate that he intended but that didn't stop him from keep kissing you. your back practically craving holes in the wall from how hard he was picking you, that didn't matter in the moment, you needed to feel him "h-haji, I love you to—" his tongue was in you, again, not letting you finish your sentence; at this point you didn't even figth for dominance, iwaizumi's aura was per se dominant, it's a game you didn't try to play and you already loosed. mouths moving vigorously with each other, you pulled out to catch your breath, followed by iwaizumi pecking your lips before letting you down on the floor "hehe, I really could kiss you all day"

#ATSUMU MIYA

— no one can convince me otherwise, this man lives for making out with you, he waits for the end of the day so he can have you sitted on his lap, on the couch, a forgotten movie in the background while you two are so into the kiss, not only mouth moving together but bodies, both your hips and his at the same rhythm. his hands maybe on your ass or your neck to push you even further into him, he needed more. he is a starved man and he is gonna get his food

"f-fuck ma baby a missed you" your hands playing with the hair of his undercut, looking at his eyes before going in again " ‘tsumu, missed you too" it was less than a day that you two didn't saw each other in reality, both work and practice were at the same time. his hands on both cheeks of your ass, gripping them, from time to time slapping it, his and your tongue exploring every place they could, even after so many years of relationship, the two of you couldn't see to get enough. the amount of grunts that left his body thru the kiss where unbelievable "ugh— wan’ ya closer, need ya closer’ baby" now his hands on your lower back pushing even more closer to his body, you were in for long today

#OSAMU MIYA

— he is gonna take his time with you, don't pressure him :< but for real, he wants to worship you every chance he has, I'm thinking about slow and living make out sessions like giggling and sharing little pecks between yk? he lives to see your smile everytime you pull out to catch your breath, you hand in the back of his neck while you rest your forehead in his

saying good morning to a cooking osamu always ended in you hugging him from behind while he ended breakfast, but not today, the sweet peck you gave him leaded to the moment you were now, up in the kitchen counter osamu between your legs with his hands behind your knees so he could put your body on his, sleepy smiles between kisses "umm a love ya so much angel" with your hands around his neck, you bring him closer so both your noses could be touching, chest going up and down from the lack of air "I love you, samu" he started kissing all over your face, nose, temples, cheeks, brows, eyes, everywhere until a weird smell started bothering him "samu! the food!" "fuck!"

#BOKUTO KOUTARO

— he doesn't gives a single fuck of who is seeing<33 if he wants to kiss you, he is gonna do it without holding back, he really doesn't care of people around, he just want his tongue down your throat lmao<3 everything happens so fast, like his movements are fast, he doesn't have times to elaborate words, he is literally drunk in your kisses<3 we live for a excited boy

he dragged you to the locker room after the MSBY match, he just needed to kiss you after seeing you cheering for him, in his jersey, with his last name, soon to be yours too as he said "come here baby, sit on my lap" you obligated and started playing with the baby hairs of his neck "you did so well kou, as always" "yeah? I think I deserve a kiss then" and you were in, making out in the bench of the locker room after a match, the team could enter anytime but who cares when you have the bonito koutaro sucking your soul out of your body? "a-ah, kou I'm so proud of you" he grunted, loudly his hands gripping your ass even more tighter than before "ah, what a lovely sight to see after a match, right guys?" atsumu cocky, as always, you got up from your boyfriends lap and give him a last kiss " ‘m gonna be waiting in the car baby, I love you" bokuto gave you a smile before angrily glaring at the blonder twin for interrupting his after game kiss "sleep with an eye open, Miya"

#SUNA RINTARO

— he lives for slow make out session, lmao you grinding on him while his hands are in your waist? bitch count him in! and mf is so cocky about it teasing you about how badly you want to kiss him, as if he wasn't dying to kiss you too. man's wouldn't let you breath literally, it may be slow but your lungs are crying for help—

the two of you were on his bed, suna's back resting on the headboard while both your legs straddled his lap, your hands in either side of his neck and trying to kiss him "Rin, come one, you want it" no response, you gave up and attempted to get you legs out of him until a squish in your waist made you freeze on the spot "now, where are we going? I thought you wanted to kiss me?" next thing he does is put his mouth on yours, lips hungrily moving together until he bitted your bottom lip to enter your mouth, the kiss got headed from there, your pants and suna's grunts could be heated from outside the room, his hands up and down your waist sometimes going back and forth so he could grab your ass, you tried to pull out to catch your breath, the fact is that he didn't let you "you wanted this doll, don't go giving up on me now"

#mai’s!works #iwaizumi hajime #atsumu miya #osamu miya #bokuto koutarou #suna rintarou #iwaizumi x reader #atsumu x reader #osamu x reader #bokuto x reader #suna x reader #iwaizumi fluff #atsumu fluff #osamu fluff #bokuto fluff #suna fluff #haikyuu #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu!! #haikyuu!! fluff #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu!! imagines #haikyuu!! scenarios #hq #hq!! #hq fluff #hq!! fluff