#a choice that isnt really a choice that also causes about as much harm as it does help? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

transmutationisms · 4 months

Note

is it unfair for me to hold anger at individuals, or criticize individuals, if covid minimization is not the result of individualized choices but mass messaging and systems at work? im not really sure what to say to leftists who ive spoonfed information who have still decided to “move on” from it, including in their activism. on one hand i understand how they got here, on the other it feels like theyre enacting violence, in the same vein as like misgendering or supporting “blue lives matter” but with the added bonus of them maybe also harming someone directly by refusal to do infection control. i really need to shift my perspective away from a heavily trauma-informed one and start living in the real world where i cant expect anyone to advocate for me, and have to find more systems-based ways to advocate for myself, and releasing some of that anger might need to be a part of moving on from that pov, but a lot of that trauma *is* individualized and resulted from the way people have responded to me, which varies from lukewarm apathy to actively telling me my life isnt worth anything to them. at the same time, it’s impossible for me to feel like i’m not the one in the wrong, when it’s very few people left who care about any of this. sorry for dumping this on *you*, im aware you’re some guy online, but the only ppl i see who still talk about covid are ppl in the same situation as me and are too close to it to assess, or think about it purely on an individual level

i don't think there's anything wrong, bad, or unfair about feeling this type of anger or betrayal. i just also think that this is one of those situations where a (completely understandable) emotional reaction does not form the basis of an effective political platform. both of these things can be true at once; your ethical considerations when navigating interpersonal relationships are not the same as the ethical considerations for someone who wants to style themselves a public health communicator. in an epidemiological sense, a person who reluctantly masks because orgs and public spaces have mask mandates is accomplishing the same thing, materially, as a person who happily masks because they care about their disabled comrades. in that sense there's no need for a public health strategy to focus on 'changing minds' and doing so often just makes people dig in their heels more. but, on a personal level, of course it matters to you whether someone actually cares for you and protects you voluntarily! figuring out how to interact with people in your own life is just not the same as figuring out the most effective mass communication and public policy strategies; what irritates me about many of the twitter-sphere covid communicators is the elision between these two things. having said that, if i can just soapbox for a second:

i try to give these people the benefit of the doubt; i do think many of them mean well and think they are doing what's right. however, the strategy that many of them have coalesced around seems to go something like this: assume that others are not covid-cautious because they are insufficiently frightened; assume this is a failure of individual intelligence-slash-awareness; using the same datasets as the applicable public health agency, interpret all data with any number of assumptions, predictions, and modelling heuristics built in; generate very terrifying infographic, post it, and wring hands when doing so doesn't change anyone's behaviour or state policy.

even in the best of cases i simply think this is ineffective; i would say public attitudes about the seriousness of covid are much more a result of state and public health inaction, ambivalence, and denialism than they are a cause. additionally, interpreting data and making predictions based on them is woolly, and a lack of transparency about their methodology, plus the overconfident desire to present themselves as authorities on the internet, means that this strategy can and does end up producing its own distortions. see, for example, recent 'med twitter' claims that "covid is airborne aids", an attempt to scare people into taking it more seriously that relies on poor and overconfident interpretations of current immunological knowledge; that ends up distorting what we do actually know about covid and the immune system (which is already fucking scary! no lies needed!); and which, as far as i can tell, actually started picking up steam in early 2020 as a right-wing conspiracy theory centred around the claims of dr (not an md) leonard g. horowitz, who argues that covid is a laboratory-engineered virus and uses it in his efforts to sell "resonating silver hydrosol" supplements to you (and your pets!) as "an effective alternative to risky vaccinations and deadly antibiotics".

getting into bed with these people is patently dangerous for obvious reasons. i really do not blame people who are trying to find reliable covid information, and are rightfully wary of state and official sources that have been downplaying this virus for its entire existence, for getting sucked in by twitter doctors when those people are often the only ones who seem to be both posting statistics and taking the virus seriously. however, what i have observed leads me to believe that, firstly, many of these people are motivated by a desire for renown and fame as much as by altruism (welcome to social media). secondly, virtually all of them are fundamentally very liberal in their politics, and this shows in the way they interpret the current state of affairs as a result of individual actions and psychological failures, rather than capitalist policy. this is absurd and leads to absolutely pointless (if not often counterproductive) narrativisation of political action as some kind of magical field where everybody just needs to change their minds and believe in the correct things really hard and then things will change: it's the liberal democratic fantasy that aggregated attitudes create policy out of thin air, no organisation or class analysis or principled communism necessary.

thirdly, a multitude of factors (incl. the paywalling and gatekeeping of knowledge) means that, although state and official interpretations of their datasets are often misleading or outright dishonest because they want to minimise risk, too often the self-styled 'covid communicators' online are not a solution to this and are prone to their own fallacious assumptions, conspiratorial thinking (see again: understanding politics as the product of many individuals believing something really hard, with no analysis of structural factors), poor data analysis, issues with comprehensive data collection in the first place (same as state sources. because they are usually using the same datasets), and a particular rhetorical emphasis on "listening to the science" that often manifests practically as a failure to actually engage with scientific methodology or to questionor improve it where it is lacking, incomplete, or bias-reproducing.

so. these are my issues with the state of covid communication; to me the question of how to navigate interpersonal relationships with people who don't value your life enough to protect it is just very different and the emotional engagement there is also quite different.

#covid

87 notes · View notes

alicentsgf · 1 year

Note

When it comes to choice or illusions of choice with Rhaenyra, I am very conflicted because she is in this political shitstorm and etc because of her own bad choices. But a sametime the one who enabled her (Viserys) allowed to is to happen and should have stop this a long time ago. So I’m stuck between Rhaenyea made her own bad and her father utterly failed her as parent and King. So bit of both.

yeah i feel like the truth that she harmed her own cause by being politically inept, and that it was her fathers fault, as well as the idea she had no real choice can all sort of co-exist?

she is politically a total mess, no doubt about that. you can easily argue that was the root of her spectacular downfall and i would agree she allowed for the extent of the bloodshed with her poor decisions. but its also true that she would have faced opposition and derision either way. and thats the point of the story.

i get so annoyed with her over her decisions because she does undermine herself, but ultimately otto and the rest were attempting to take that crown either way. and though i think she could have won the crown back if she'd been a better political agent... that doesnt mean her choices werent somewhat illusions; we see this in alicent - being the very antithesis of rhaenyra doesnt work either. the world still would have torn into her somehow like it does alicent for being everything that rhaenyra isnt.

its the whole madonna/whore thing. women are shamed for sex. or shamed for not having it. shamed for their interests. or for not having any. shamed for engaging. shamed if they dont. you can only ever be one of two things, and whichever you choose you cant win. i'd argue that rhaenyra would have been demonised by history even if she were the best possible ruler just for displaying attributes necessary in a monarch, but considered ugly in a woman. she would have been held to an impossible standard.

so would rhaenyra's story have ended well if she'd been all duty and sacrifice instead? probably not imo. i think the result would have been less bloody but who knows by how much. eventually the nature of the world would have caught up to her in some way. one particularly bad misstep and she could have seen rebellion or the like (one reason alicents fears for her sons are valid - they would have been a rallying point for inevitable dissenters and rhaenyra/her supporters might have felt it necessary to remove them as figureheads). and this is such a double standard because with Viserys (who has a very similar attitude to ruling) everyone just let him do as he pleased, the lords were happy to make things easy for him, and there were no consequences for that he experienced personally. (think of how men get to move on from whatever public scandal they were part of whilst the women are forced to lie in the festering remnants for the rest of their natural lives. we all know its true.)

thats what i mean about the illusion of choice - i will continue to point out how stupid some of rhaenyras decisions were because i think they led to the bloodiest possible outcome, but she really was set up to fail in many ways. she could never truly win, no matter her choices.

#rhaenyra targaryen #hotd #ask #anon #hotd meta #hotd thoughts

30 notes · View notes

ecoamerica · 22 days

Text

youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

6K notes · View notes

sanfielle · 1 year

Note

5, 8, 17 for a character of your choice; 38 for at least 5 prolegomenon characters, and 44 for tryxie

a grab bag.... hmm.... world is my oyster...!! i tihnk for the first 3 ill random gen soemone. smile. ok i got sa!ytk so ill do this i guess forrrrr dusty? the protag. the killer.

5. On an average day, what can be found in your character’s pockets?

pretty mcuh a handful of useful stuff. defintiely has a swiss army knife, a pack of gum, a spare band-aid... his wallet with like 3 diff identities on drivers licenses or smth. he ususally likes to be prepared for stuff ykwim.

8. Has your character ever fired a gun? If so, what was their first target?

LOL he is a former hitman...!! i havent really thoufht about his past hits though. i think maybe his first was jsut some random person in debt to whoever hired him... thats probsbly usually what these things are about after all.

17. What was your character’s favorite toy as a child?

in my head dusty used to have thsi old firetruck that he loved so much adn carried around everywhere. and it barely works because its so aged and the plastics all brittle adn the paints faded but it was so important to him. his son has it now

ok gd. prolegomenon time. lets see...

38. Is your character more likely to remove a problem/threat, or remove themselves from a problem/threat?

REMOVE THE PROBLEM:

yua. in her head tehre are no problems or threats that cant be overcome so she will throw herself with gusto at things, though strategically... she wont just do this blindly. she knwos everything has a soft spot though.

cherry. mew cannot conceptualize the fact taht there are threats and problems mew cannot solve by mewself, or at all even with friends' help. mew is unkillable. mew is unstoppable. mew is cherry freakin' thaxton. etc.

sofie. everythinf in the world can be solved by being annoying enough and a little luck. aslo now that bud can explode stuff bud is like Well ill just fucking blow it up? and buds right. most stuff can be solved by blwoing it up. bud IS the threat in this scenario...

dina. dina is similar to yua inthe way that itll back off to approach things strategically adn see what other avenues can be taken, though it also isnt scared to get a little dirty in there. it will take advatnage of every tool at its disposal to do wahtever has to be done.

diego. unmovable object, once it's mind is latched onto soemthing it will not let go until the roadblock is removed or it is bascislly dead. its a very stubborn person who works at something until stuff goes its way.

rhett. hes like diego but worse in every way. there is only one problem/threat on earth wehre he conceded and removed hismelf and his brother from it but ithink if he were ever faced with that same issue today he would beat it to death with a rock.

aldrich. everything in the world is a puzzle to them and they have the key in their head, ifthey can just think it through. sure it will take a few tries adn some failrue but at the end of the day theywill unlock the key factor to make it work. or theyll die. either or

REMOVE THEMSELF:

roy. he is a pretty straightforward kind of guy who can recognize when hes in over his head. also wehn faced with an issue he cant handle he usually just has a little upset about it.

jesse. theyre like water in the way taht theyll always take the path of least resistance, mostly becasue they dont like to be challenged in a lot of ways (isnt life challenging enough!?)...

amada. she gets overwhelmed easy and isnt very confident in herself and her ability to tackle stuff. if she has friends by her side MAYBE its a different story but mostly... she will just back down when stuff gets too hard.

isa. it kind of depends on the issue becasue if its something they feel can be handled wiht minimal issue/harm, theyll do it, but generally most thinfs cannot be handled this way lol. if stuff looks a little too big for them to chew theyll back off as far as they ccan.

julio. he doesnt like to cause any sort of fuss over stuff, so if he cant handle something (esp by himself), hell just walk away and try something esle. theres always anotehr safer/easier avenue to take!

reed: i mean theyll TRY. theyll chew on it and think it through but generally theyd prefer to go around stuff if possible. tehy dont really like to pushthemself to overcome anything or whatever, they think thats an easy road to hurting yourself....

OK. that waseverything i cared to say. whatever. tryxie.

44. How easy or difficult is it for your character to say “I love you?” Can they say it without meaning it?

i think... tryxie is a very deeply self obsessed persson. it doesnt say 'love you!' very easiky this is thekind of thing resevred for wehn it thinks it will never see this person again or soemthign onthat level of importance. even for family and stuff. its said that only once before when not meaning itt and it ledto so much drama taht it has vowed never to say that without meaning it ever again. normal guy x

oc questions!

#smile.#sa!ytk #prolegomenon #ttrpg #whatevws..

0 notes

spectral-honey · 3 years

Text

/rp

Guys it just really kills me how badly tubbo needs support and how little he gets it.

He didn't ever ask to be the president, and when he gave his acceptance speech he asked tommy to be his VP, to support him, to stand by his side because it was them against the world.

He needed the support of his best friend, he needed the support quackity and Fundy as his cabinet. He was always asking for their opinions and what they thought should happen and he kept saying he was trusting them to have his back, to help him make decisions too hard for him on his own.

And then when they were negotiating with dream everyone just kept comparing him to schlatt. The dictator. The guy who made Tubbo decorate his own execution. The guy who forced him to turn on his friends.

When he made a decision (that was, arguably I suppose, the only option that wouldn't put them in an equally bad if not worse situation) no one supported him in it, quackity and Fundy both actively told him he was wrong and were pissed at him for it.

Quackity is caught up in his own things with el rapids. After today's stream Fundy seems to be leaving for a 'long long time' as well. Besides Ranboo, who is doing his damnedest to be literally everyone's emotional support boi and therefore can't always be around, tubbo doesn't really have anyone backing him up.

In the end, it really is almost like Dream's been the most present support for Tubbo. And he's actively manipulating him for his own gain.

Tubbo's situation is as bad as Tommy's is, and no one seems to see it.

#dream smp #tubbo #im not trying to character bash at all or anything like that!#its just so sad to see tubbo constantly reaching out in little ways and yet never really getting a response :(#its like. he and tommy have so many parallels with their situation right now and i think its very obvious that tommys not doing well but i #--think its not acknowledged nearly enough how this is affecting tubbo terribly as well #i guess its sort of that people are like 'canonically tubbos the evil one for kicking out tommy!!' and i mean. creative freedom always its.#i just very much think its not canon at all and you are wrong? in the nicest way possible #tubbo has agency of course but hes in a pretty impossible situation too!! hes trying so hard please be sympathetic to the boy :(#ive been thinking about this for a while but the fact that fundy is going off with nikki and possibly ranboo as well (?) thats like.#literally almost everyone whose been allied with tubbo???#im so distressed about the boy #also like!! with the decision to exile tommy #they had a trade yknow? tommy exiled & dream having this invisible control over everyone being solidified #in exchange for the (at least for now) safety freedom and a solidification of tubbo as the leader of an independent nation #which like. it was NOT a good option but it was sort of the /only/ option besides being trapped inside lmanburg or everyone inside lmanbur-#-g getting killed.#which. i mean isnt this exactly what you would expect with this sort of political power struggle??#a choice that isnt really a choice that also causes about as much harm as it does help?#i guess i just feel like tubbos doing his BEST and he needs help too but no one is :(

781 notes · View notes

merakiui · 3 years

Note

Hello! I come with an odd request, its smth i just thought of out of the blue, but can you write something for Diluc, Kaeya and Xiao's reaction to a GN!reader who has a soft spot for slimes? :")

Like they actually get followed by slimes but they dont hurt them or anything, theyre like their personal bodyguards of sorts ahhaha

I just find the slimes so cute, but if this isnt too interesting to write for its okay ;;3;; Thank you for your time!

Diluc, Kaeya, and Xiao with an S/O who Likes Slimes

note - awww this was a very cute ask, anon!! also, I hit the 900 followers milestone! omgomgomg thank you all so, so much!!!!! your support and nice messages are what keeps me going! :D <3 <3

🔥 Diluc 🔥

Diluc always thought slimes were annoying and troublesome. They’d get into his vineyards and bother his workers with their aggressive nature.

So he’s isn’t amused when he watches you walk up the winery steps, a group of slimes hopping behind you. He has to stop his work because he’s just so confused. Why aren’t you using your weapon to take them down? Why are they following you?

Maybe you’ve got some sort of attractant on you that’s enticing the slimes. Whatever it is, he doesn’t exactly care. He just wants those slimes off of his property.

Diluc stands out in the open, expecting an explanation as his workers look on in mild worry and bewilderment. It’s not exactly common to see so many slimes peacefully mingling with a person.

Even though he tries to dislike the fact that all of these slimes are bothersome, it’s hard to deny the fact that you’re so happy around them. You’ll tell him that one just started following you and suddenly it became an entire fan club of slimes, all of whom seemed to find comfort in your presence.

Diluc doesn’t really understand the logic or reason behind that, but as long as you’re safe and the slimes don’t wreak havoc he supposes it wouldn’t hurt to let them stay for a little bit.

Your cheery mood definitely influences this choice and he finds the sight to be endearing.

But that doesn’t mean the slimes get to stay forever. Diluc doesn’t want to risk losing business as a result of the slimes, so you’ll have to either spend time with them away from his property or on specific days.

Maybe the two of you have a small picnic in the forest and the slimes join you!

He doesn’t want to admit it, but whenever the slimes surround you like enthusiastic puppies he thinks it’s quite adorable.

🧊 Kaeya 🧊

He considers it to be charming in its own unique way. At first he assumes the slimes are up to no good, but when you hold him back from attacking he’s very confused.

And then the slimes hop over to you and they don’t even try to hurt you. He’s even more surprised when you go over and pat one of them, as if they’re your friends.

Once you explain that the slimes have taken a liking to you ever since you saved one of them, you’ve made it your goal to never harm them. So they’ve become your little guardians.

Kaeya thinks that’s absolutely adorable. His sweet, lovely partner surrounded by slimes… It’s a strangely cute sight!

Under the guise of a flirt, he’ll say how the slimes resemble overprotective children shielding their parent. And he slyly says something about how he could be the father. The lot of you can be one happy family!

But then the slimes turn on him, threatening him with their own elemental abilities. You can’t help but laugh as they surround you in their attempts to drive Kaeya away.

Whenever he tries to come within touching distance of you, your new friends are quick to lash out. Kaeya pouts about it, somewhat jealous that you’re giving the slimes all of your attention.

“I just want to hug you, my dear,” he says. “Perhaps even kiss you, but those slimes are quite tricky…”

Once you’ve had your fun, you’ll find a way to show the slimes that Kaeya means well. He is your lover, after all, and he’s not going to hurt the slimes. At least, you make him promise not to hurt them.

He doesn’t mind the slimes as long as they’re not going to cause any harm to Mondstadt and its people. And, of course, no harm to you!

The slimes have always looked cute, so he supposes he’d rather have small, cute things fawn over you rather than aggressive hilichurls.

☁️ Xiao ☁️

He probably noticed it when he was watching you from Wangshu Inn. You were coming back from a long day of commissions and a trail of slimes were following you.

He thinks it’s strange at first and then even stranger when they aren’t attacking. But there aren’t any signs of demonic influence and the slimes don’t appear agitated, so it’s really none of his business.

Maybe it’s safe? Xiao can’t be sure, so he meets you outside just in case. It’s a surprise to see him out in the open, but he just wants to know why you’re bringing dangerous monsters back to a public space.

You’ll have to assure him that they won’t cause anyone trouble. After all, the slimes are your friends! They helped you out when you were struggling during one of your commissions.

He’s a little relieved to know they don’t harbor any ill intent towards you, but he still has his doubts. Xiao doesn’t really think the slimes mean well; they’re always so quick to attack anyone within their proximity so it’s very weird to see so many gathered around you, peaceful and unbothered.

But you’re absolutely positive that they’re safe and won’t disturb anyone. They’ve started treating you like a friend and you think it’s only fair if you reciprocate those feelings.

Eventually, Xiao warms up to the slimes. It’s cute…in a weird way. He likes seeing you so happy whenever the slimes come hopping over to you.

As long as they don’t try to use their elemental powers against you, he’s fine with them crowding around you. Although he will get annoyed if they continuously prevent him from spending some alone time with you.

It’s a silly sight to watch him chase away the slimes as if they were stray cats.

At some point, though, he is going to want them to leave you alone. It can be tricky to have so many slimes near you when you’re trying to go on dates with him or relax after a long day of work.

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact hcs #genshin impact diluc #diluc x reader #diluc headcanons #diluc hcs #diluc #genshin impact kaeya #kaeya x reader #kaeya headcanons #kaeya hcs #kaeya #genshin impact xiao #xiao x reader #xiao headcanons #xiao hcs #xiao

2K notes · View notes

clitfisto · 3 years

Note

wait omg what do u mean the narrative in wwdits is out for blood? the narrative in wwdits isnt locked in the trunk but rather alive and on the prowl???

thank you SO much for asking, this might not make much sense but i am Convinced that the narrative is specifically out for nandor's blood, possibly nadja and laszlo too, spilled by guillermo's hands

(disclaimer im not caught up with s3 so this might be blatantly bullshit but bear with me for a second)

so like. the narrative in wwdits is slow at best cause each episode focuses on one scenario and how the characters react to it because that's how sitcoms work, but when you break down the overall story it seems to have a pretty clear trajectory? cause like. it's all driven by guillermo killing vampires.

so the first thing to note is that guillermo is not a vampire hunter by choice, he's a hunter by fate. he's descended from van helsing, which makes him really fucking good at it, but he only ever kills vampires in situations where his hand was forced (killing accidentally, self defense, to save his vampires, etc). he doesn't actively seek out vampires to kill them, he just keeps ending up in situations where someone has to die. even the time he joined a vampire hunting group and went out to intentionally kill vampires he joined accidentally and only went along to try and sabotage their mission. he's not trying to be a vampire slayer, he spends most of s2 trying to avoid it, but he can't help it! the dude just keeps killing! it's not his fault the narrative puts him there!

second thing: the idea of guillermo killing his vampires has been foreshadowed repeatedly. from the van helsing reveal the idea of guillermo killing them is fucking everywhere, things like when he buys wooden stakes for laszlo's topiaries or when he puts out the fire on nandor with holy water and they both immediately accuse him of trying to kill them, or that bit where he throws 3 stakes away from him and they just happen to stab perfectly into portraits of the vampires. after the vampires find out guillermo has been killing other vampires they immediately become afraid of him (which is fair), eg. when nandor finds out about carol and guillermo accidentally presses the sharp broom handle to nandor's chest and there's that tense moment, then later nandor asks "why are you so interested in how vampires die", and also s3ep1 where guillermo's locked in the basement n shit and nadja wants to kill him and then they try to hypnotize him into not harming any of them (which! doesn't work! and i'm pretty sure that's a surprise tool that will hurt us later!)

so BASICALLY the idea of guillermo killing nandor + the others has been brought up multiple times by other characters, and it's also established that guillermo regularly ends up in situations where he has to kill vampires whether he likes it or not, and is fully capable of hurting nandor if he wanted to. do you see why i think it's just a matter of time.

the reason i think guillermo will kill nandor specifically is because they've always had the closest relationship so it would be the most emotionally effective, but also because nandor holds the power to turn guillermo into a vampire, which is the key to guillermo's character arc. if nandor chooses to turn him then the fated vampire slayer thing probably isn't a thing anymore (they're just kinda antithetical, i don't see a way for both things to coexist), but the longer he holds off the more guillermo will resent him for it and the more opportunity he has, like. there's this perfect tension in guillermo's character between wanting to be a vampire but slowly coming into his own as a vampire killer, and the question of which one wins out all hangs on who breaks first.

tldr: guillermo regularly has to kill vampires whether he wants to or not, the idea of him killing nandor nadja and laszlo has been foreshadowed for a while, and him killing nandor specifically would be a dramatically satisfying end to his character arc

#this is..barely coherent but i pray someone gets what i mean cause this has been taking up my brain all fucking day #wwdits Will Be A Tragedy i am Convinced #long post #wwdits spoilers #maybe? idk #please i beg of you someone understand this

34 notes · View notes

wanderingwomanwondering · 3 years

Text

911 Eddie/Buddie Thoughts, eps 413-501

*a long post and no gifs, I’m so sorry*

Can we talk abt the fact that in 413 bathena have an argument about not being partners and how that parallels eddie’s tendency to be an emotional loner, not revealing his heart until his feelings bubble over? He struggles to trust/confide in others bc he struggles to trust/be honest with himself abt how he feels/what he needs. His reasons are diff than athena’s but it’s still a parallel behavior.

Also in 413 eddie is helping a kid who’s mom is hurting him. That feels parallel at least partially to shannon abandoning christopher which caused harm. Eddie is focused on the kid/christopher, focused on helping him…to the complete exclusion of himself and his needs. This is why he chose to continue with ana supposedly for chris’s sake despite carla’s golden advice. Tho we all suspect that chris doesn’t like ana as much as he lets on/as much as eddie wants to believe. But that’s a side note rn.

Then cut to the end of 413, the gunshot scene. Knowing what we know now from 501, basically eddie taking that bullet is a catalyst. The beginning of the end of loner, partner-averse eddie. It’s the start of him needing to reckon with his own wants needs and desires. He’s not going to stop considering chris obviously but he does need to look at himself his life his heart and what makes him happy. Remember Shannon’s complaint in their marriage was that she needed a partner, and now he’s reckoning with the fact that he wants/needs one too, and not just at work.

There are one or two very grounded non-clown ways to read that gsw scene bc dude was just shot out of the blue and there was plenty of shock and fear to go around. But through the clowning glass, we can also see it as a reiteration that buck and eddie are in fact partners in a big way. They just rescued a kid together just like they’ve worked tirelessly together to save countless other people before him. They are partners. At work. I would argue also in life but I’ll get to that later.

Eddie’s prolonged eye contact with buck, reaching for him. Buck’s shock and terror, staring deeply into Eddie’s eyes and watching him bleed. That whole scene begged the question “now who’s going to save eddie?” Literally and figuratively.

The show starts with the literal answer. buck. It’s finally buck. In 414 he hauled him up, dressed his wound, begged him to stay with him and to live. In Eddie Begins, buck was an onlooker, eddie saved himself in true eddie fashion, but in 414 buck ran point on saving him. Buck dragged him to safety, buck lifted him up, buck stopped the bleeding, and buck served as his lifeline begging him to stay/live.

The other interesting thing I noticed about the scene in 414 in the fire truck on the way to the hospital is that *eddie is not wearing his saint christopher medal*. Buck rips open his shirt to stop the bleeding and the medal is not there. It’s absence is loud af. I squinted to see if it had just slid to the side when buck laid him down but i couldn’t see it at all! Please correct me if I’m wrong.

Anyway that choice, to have the medal not be there or not be visible in that particular scene is huge bc that entire sequence from gunshot to arrival at the hospital is just abt eddie (and buck). In a way, in those scenes at least, buck is wo his armor (firefighter uniform) and eddie is wo his armor (the medal). They are vulnerable in those scenes physically (out in the open, exposed to the shooter) and emotionally (not shielded by their personally meaningful protective items). Combined with the staring and the reaching it’s a big indication that things are abt to get deeper between them (fingers crossed).

Back to 501. remember eddie’s been shot before, in combat. I think what makes the sniper situation important is not just that he could have died (he’s been there done that got the silver star) but that he’s not who he was the last time he almost died by gsw. He’s in LA now, he’s not in the military, chris is growing up, he has the fire fam, he has buck, he’s a widower. Eddie is growing, changing. starting to recognize his emotional needs bc for the first time in his life there’s room/opportunity to do that in a big way and not necessarily have it implode his marriage, piss off his family, hurt chris, or ruin his career. IF he actually confronts himself head on and deals with all the stuff beneath the surface. Repressed. This gunshot isn’t exactly abt his mortality but his quality of life. asking him what’s his life abt and more importantly how can he be his whole authentic self complete with his very own emotions needs and desires embracing love care and support leaning on others. Remember in that one therapy session he had those are the things he wants for chris. Now he has to find and choose those same things for himself.

In 414 by the time eddie is in the hospital, the medal is back and prominent in every scene. He’s back to framing his relationship with buck in terms of chris. But he’s the one making decisions for chris. What he wants for himself and for buck isnt irrelevant here. If it was all abt chris and only chris i think eddie would have told buck abt the will ages ago. If it was all about chris and only chris eddie maybe wouldn’t have struggled so much to say that he made buck chris’s legal guardian if he dies. Nah. I think eddie sees buck as his partner in life too on some level but he couldn’t accept/say that plainly. He had to make it abt only chris in his head in order to be okay with linking their trio of lives together forever through the guardian decision. I mean eddie didn’t even tell buck abt the legal guardian decision bc he was shot, he told him bc buck thought he was expendable! Instead of shaking him and saying you are not and never will be expendable to me, he chose to disclose the will. It was effective for sure. Evan heard him loud and clear. But wow you gave buck a whole ass person, like the person most important to you in the world?? And didn’t say anything until you survived a sniper an effing year later?? That’s a hell of a choice!

Anyway i really hope eddie and buck are on their way to being together bc i can’t take much more of this. Before they get there tho my dude eddie has a lot of work to do this season!

I reference 408 and go into more thoughts on 501 here. I blab abt the heart transplant metaphor in 501 as well as my spec abt parts of 502 by extension here. I am dying to talk abt these arcs y’all like srsly so feel free to rb/comment.

#911 fox #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #episode 413 #episode 414 #episode 501 #911 meta #911 speculation

22 notes · View notes

creacherkeeper · 3 years

Text

im getting a little too in my family feels today and so INSTEAD of feeling those im just going to ramble for a second about why i fucking love paladin!aelwyn because. im. just like this i guess im coping leave me alone

cw for discussions of child abuse, maladaptive coping, drugs and alcohol, self harm, destructive tendencies, basically everything we see in canon and the implications

aelwyn is ... SO interesting to me because for as much of her interiority as we see, as much of her as we think we understand, as much as i could ramble about her character for hours, we know ALMOST NOTHING about her in actuality?? (besides ... one key thing)

(this is like 2k and probably incoherent someone please stop me)

okay. listen. almost everything we see aelwyn do in s1 is maladaptive rebellion against her parents and home life. the drinking, the drugs, the partying, perhaps some of kalvaxus (though i dont think we fully understand how much of that was forced on her as well, kalina WAS watching her when she was talking to adaine about it). you can say like, oh aelwyn is a party animal, she's impulsive, she makes risky decisions, she's bitchy and rude, and its like. okay but IS SHE ACTUALLY. because under her parents thumb she had an EXTREMELY limited amount of freedom, and usually when people are suffering from very little control over their life, they WILL act destructively over the tiny bit they can, either harming themselves or their environment or people lower than them in the pecking order, because in a way, that feels like a reclamation of autonomy. saying "you have so much power over me but can you stop me from hurting myself and destroying what you havent managed to claim yet?". its just like, kind of what human brains do and frequently has little to do with a persons actual personality or impulses, its just. desperate brains trying to control SOMETHING because autonomy is a fundamental human need and when thats taken away we get. very bad off. (this is one big reason eating disorders are SO common with abused kids.) so i think a lot of the s1 aelwyn we see is like. this is a very desperate, abused teenager "acting out" in the only way it is possibly somewhat safe for her to do so because, on a psychological level, the self destruction is weirdly the only emotional tether and its either this or just dissociate all the time (something we do see she has problems with in canon)

and yes, she did treat adaine horribly in s1. she fully did. obviously what we get in canon is what happens but a moment thats interesting to me is in episode 1 where adaine has attacked aelwyn several times, who either does nothing or just bounces it back, when she says "i never cast spells at you" and siobhan immediately retcons it and says "yes you do, all the time" (i havent gone back and watched this bit so i might be wording this wrong). obviously its an improv show and the canon is built between performers as they go, but that was interesting to me. that brennan hadnt intended for her to have fought back in that way. she definitely feeds into the emotional abuse from their parents and participates in all the toxicity there, but we know in canon that she did that because of overwhelming fear and self preservation. and that her self hatred because of it just fed back into the cycle and made her feel like she wasnt good enough to even try to break free from it. this is very common in golden child/scapegoat sibling relationships where the golden child SEES what the parents are capable of and becomes a participant in the abuse out of fear for their own standing. in any way siding with the scapegoat child not only directs abuse at themselves as well, but frequently makes things WORSE for the scapegoat because the parents will take out the challenge to their power on them even more. so, if aelwyn DID ever try to defend or help adaine when they were small, she would have VERY QUICKLY learned that made things worse for everyone. and just. sectioned that part of her brain off, as she's done with so many other things. (and i dont think im reading too much into the forest scene with the abernants to say their parents were VERY QUICK to turn abuse towards aelwyn if she stepped out of line even a little. like, you dont flinch when a hand moves unless. you know. dont need to say it just something to think about. as far as we saw in canon, she had done everything they asked of her leading up to the forest, and we DONT KNOW what happened in it but we do know brennan specifically called out how in broken spirits she was when adaine was summoned, even though they did the ritual to avoid all of the nightmare bullshit)

(the house party is literally a whole separate post but i think its fair to point out that 1) she was super under the influence when that was happening which DEFINITELY is in no way an excuse for her behavior but worth remembering when trying to analyze that 2) her losing that fight did canonically have DRASTIC consequences for her and even if she didnt know exactly how that was going to turn out, i think she knew how bad it might be. and she did not know adaine or any of the bad kids were going to be there in the first place)

all that said, it feels in some ways counterproductive to say that aelwyn is an extremely devoted and protective person (yes we're getting to the paladin shit i know i've been rambling a while) but i think that thats strangely ALL WE ACTUALLY KNOW ABOUT HER. because we've established that her self-destructive and abusive behavior in s1 is almost entirely psychologically scripted for her by her parents, we dont know how much of her villain shit in s1 was LITERALLY UNDER THREAT OF DEATH because we know at least killing the oracle was and we dont know how much of the rest of it was mandated by either her parents or kalina other than that she probably was under orders not to tell adaine the truth, and we know participating in all of this caused extreme self loathing in her that she refused to show to anybody and was too terrified to act on in any way

so, like. what does that actually leave us?

here's what we do know about aelwyn:

- of all the schools of magic, she went into abjuration

- the entire bbeg plan from season 1 hinged on aelwyn's complete faith that her level 1 sister was the most prodigious diviner in the world

- right after (?) the house party, she locked her memories where only adaine could find it with a note basically saying "theres so much bad blood between us but i know only you could find this"

- she desperately wanted to protect adaine and the fact that she was too afraid to do so made her hate herself (and her knowing that adaine now knows this is the turning point in their relationship)

- despite everything, even in the nmk forest, she still loved her parents

- the SECOND she is shown genuine love and affection and care from adaine, and adaine says whatever you do, i am here with you, all her actions from there forward are just about protecting adaine from their father, very nearly at the cost of her own life

- with what she probably thought were her last words (and would have been if adaine hadnt given her the tincture), all she wanted to communicate was how to help adaine and the bad kids, and how despite everything she had always believed in her

- at five levels of exhaustion, unconscious, she used her first spell slot after nine months of torture to build a shield around adaine

NOW we get to paladin!aelwyn. because, once everything is stripped away, the abuse and the control and the maladaption and the threats and the torture, EVERYTHING we ACTUALLY can glean about aelwyn's personality and inner core is that she's protective and devoted. and of course classes arent locked by personality, but that just screams paladin to me. its her WHOLE THING. adaine even says "wizards dont have heals, we dont care about other people" and of COURSE that isnt true for either of them, but? mechanically? aelwyn chose the wizard school that DID let her protect, and DID let her help, but i dont think, at this point, going forward, thats really going to be enough for her (and we could also talk about the parallels between them, how often adaine uses her portents to help other people)

i think a lot of the different reads on aelwyn come from this fundamental disconnect between her actions and displayed personality vs who she actually is and what she actually wants. and i think there are very different interpretations of what thats going to look like for her going forward. but i think, for a girl who's most hated characteristic about herself was her self preservation at the detriment of others, her perceived selfishness, and her fear ... isn't choosing to be braver and more selfless and more protective and shedding that self-preserving instinct for the betterment of others ... and MECHANICALLY being able to act on all those things ... the logical next step? i think its going to be a LONG TIME before aelwyn can love herself, but what other way is there to try? if adaine loves her, and adaine believes she can be better, isnt being better because she trusts adaine kind of a form of self love? saying, i dont believe in myself, but i believe in the person who believes in me, and maybe, in a roundabout way, thats the same thing. she was never able to TRY to be better before, because trying to improve even a little, even when people arent watching, when a harmful force has so much power over you and your actions ... like, the mental dissonance is honestly TOO much to even try, thats WAY more terrifying than letting yourself be bad, to the point where thats psychologically impossible for a lot of people. but now she actually has space and freedom and CHOICE and she CAN embrace the instincts she always had to shove down, she CAN be the person she knows her sister needed her to be

i dont know, i think theres an inherent love letter to yourself in wanting to be better and wanting to improve, even if you justify it by saying its for someone else. and now aelwyn actually CAN improve, and thats probably going to be extremely awkward and scary and there will be set backs and backslides for sure. but. i dont know. i think she wants to make up for lost time. because she never wanted the time to be lost in the first place. and if a protector is who she always wanted to be, whats stopping her from being that now?

#fantasy high #dimension 20 #aelwyn abernant #WHO LET ME WRITE ALL THIS #does this even. fucking. make sense. who knows.#THE BRAINROT THE BRAINROT THE BRAINROT

40 notes · View notes

xoxo-ren-xoxo · 3 years

Text

Tommy’s (and Tubbo’s) Character /rp /dSMP

This is a bit of a rant so like be warned. I have nothing against any CCs mentioned in this, this is all roleplay, lighthearted, and just a bit of fun analysis. Mostly this is a ramble about how I see certain people analysing Tommy’s character on tumblr and twt, and why I think they’re wrong. This isn’t directed at anyone specific, just a trend I’ve been seeing that kinda irks me. I don’t dislike the fandom, just a few ‘takes’ have been really weird for me.

TW for everything below: analysing the effects of trauma, abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, and lack of therapy.

I’m not really liking how victim-blamey everyone is getting currently in the dSMP, both in fandom and canon. In canon with certain characters but especially in fan analysis posts and especially about Tommy and Tubbo. People legitimately celebrating that Tommy might start ‘apologising’ for his actions more and 'growing as a person' somehow don’t realise that hes been made this way through a tonne of negative reinforcement. abuse, and gaslighting. And people blaming Tubbo for actions he had no choice in, rather than the actions he did choose.

Currently, as I see it, Tommy is so scared that anyone would find a reason to be pissed off at him that his fighting spirit has been completely crushed. He was exiled and abused when he should have been helped and given an understanding figure to guide him and teach him how to deal with things non-violently. In everyone’s eyes, the problem was that Tommy was creating violence with no real reason, acting recklessly and commiting crimes. Tubbo, having made him a part of his cabinet, knew that this would only harm the country. So instead of talking to him reasonably, he got angry, put him on trial, and punished him with the logbook (humiliating him by making him report back to Fundy, which he obviously hated). Tommy’s actions were, of course, bad, but did he deserve everyone ganging up on him? No. Especially when Tubbo was supposed to be in his corner, helping him out like he always said he would (”It’s me and you vs Dream” etc). This is the first betrayal of trust from Tommy’s POV. He doesn’t understand what he did wrong to its full extent, and no one can explain it to him.

However, Tubbo was under a lot of pressure from Dream and George, and he’s a literal child President, so his ‘safety over friendship’ actions are understandable. I don’t believe Tubbo is solely to blame for anything he’s done in season 2, but it can’t all be excused. If you are to blame Tommy for his recklessness, you have to blame Tubbo, at least partially, for his disregard for Tommy’s feelings and mental state. There were other ways to go about the entire thing, including the trial, which was just horrible to watch, and agreeing to give Dream the disc, something Tommy gave him in pure confidence that it would be safe with Tubbo. Yikes moment.

At that time, Tubbo knew a lot of things about Tommy. In fact, he probably knew the most about Tommy out of anyone on the server. He knew the discs were incredibly important and a comfort item for Tommy. He knew Tommy had trauma from being exiled in the past. He knew Tommy was abused, or at least manipulated by Wilbur, in addition to growing up in war. Wilbur once told Tommy to stop being reckless, and Tommy listened, changing his attitude because he looked up to Wilbur so much. Then Wilbur said ‘let’s be the bad guys’ and stopped trying to mentor Tommy. There’s a conflict here, because Tommy was told by Wilbur that he wasn’t good enough to be President (links to the idea of ‘not being strong enough’) but he knows that Wilbur was a bad person. But Tommy is never given the chance to reconsile his feelings surrounding Wilbur, both because of Ghostbur and because of the conflict he starts with George. So he is harbouring a mixture of emotions about his mentor and brother, not understanding how to untangle the ‘real Tommy’ from the manipulated boy he became.

What was going through his head when he stole from George and griefed him? Perhaps the thought that he needed to show he was still the same old Tommy. Maybe the need to ‘prove himself’ as a strong person? It could have just been an outlet for his trauma. He’s grown up in a world where everyone is either a friend or an enemy. George isn’t a friend. How was he supposed to know that hurting him was bad?

Tubbo was pressured into the actions he took against Tommy, but he was pressured far too easily. There is no moment where Tubbo turns to Tommy and makes sure he’s okay, he views him as ‘selfish’ and overdramatic, and sees his actions that way. This makes sense from Tubbo’s POV, he’s struggling to be President in ways that Wilbur *knew* he would, but in Tommy’s eyes this is the worst betrayal he’s ever known. The moment Tubbo (rightfully, but poorly executed) defies Tommy’s plan to hire Technoblade (ahem, seeing Techno as a weapon again) and exiles Tommy is the moment their friendship shatters. They’re two people who don’t understand each other anymore. Two people who are technically in the right, but only hurt each other.

What Tommy needed was a therapist, instead he had Dream, who put out the fire of rebellion that made him so strong, and Techno, who was trying to help but doing it in the wrong way.

People see tommy's change post-exile as a good thing because he's not as rebellious anymore and he’s thinking things through a lot before he does them, but they will soon realise that his rebellion was one of his best traits and the fact that no one saw it as anything but a problem really shows. He now second-guesses himself so much and is so scared of being wrong that everything seems too difficult and too dangerous. Every trait can have a positive and negative side. Tommy's defiant nature would have made him the perfect negotiator with a little practise. In fact, he had plenty of good ideas before he was exiled (using spirit against Dream, though it didnt work in the end, for example). The negative side of this was recklessness and the desire to cause problems on purpose, but what he needed was a friend (looking at you Tubbo) who understood that hes been through several wars, was manipulated by Wilbur, and hasnt known a time of peace where everyone who wasnt on his side was out to kill him. Now that ‘fight’ is gone he's just become easier to manipulate.

He may be getting better (see: telling Dream to go fuck himself) but there hasn't been any long-term growth because he was never told what kind of rebellion was good and what was bad. He was just told it was all bad. By Dream (and by Tubbo). Who he doesn't trust. So he's just going to revert back to his old ways because no one told him what was bad in a way that didn't make him feel like everyone was against him. Dream is the enemy (though Tommy’s feelings towards him are complicated, they make his brain go all ‘flippy floppy’) and Dream told him that rebellion was bad, so rebellion must be good always, right?

And then there's Techno. Techno did nothing wrong except for when he did. Techno is 100% right except for when he isn’t. He doesn't understand Tommy because Tommy was never fully open about what Dream had done and how it affected him. That's not Tommys fault though, because who the fuck openly talks about their trauma? So neither of them are to blame for pretty much anything up until the confrontation at the community house.

However, Techno's methods and ideology were not what Tommy needed. He was thrown from one extreme to another over and over again, from complete subservience to total rebellion. Neither of these inforce good attitudes in Tommy. One, as stated before, makes it so that he will regain his negative traits again. The other reinforces those violent traits as good, just like Wilbur did. The only difference is that Techno had good intentions, he wasnt trying to use Tommy, which is why he feels so used when Tommy 'betrays' him (Techno doesnt realise that he himself betrayed Tommy by teaming with Dream, he sees it more as a transaction than a personal thing). Techno feels so hurt by Tommy ‘viewing him as a weapon’ that he goes on with his no-mercy attack, completely dropping Tommy at his lowest point.

Tommy says he doesn't want to be like everyone he's hated. In fact, he say's he is 'worse' than all the villains. This is very obviously untrue, though he was clearly going down a dangerous path with Techno's influence (see: bullying Fundy, spawning wither, kidnapping Connor, and saying that the discs are more important than Tubbo, more on that later). He's not a villain but who exactly has said he's not a villain. Dream? Techno? Neither of them can be trusted in his eyes. They say he's a good guy, Wilbur wanted to be the bad guy, who's right? He doesn't know. He has a crisis of morality.

And? Some people want to point at that and say 'aha! Character development! He's finally realising his actions have a negative affect on others!' OH GOD NO??? He's a *child* who thinks that he is worse than his abuser. Does that sound like positive character growth to you?

Lastly, the discs. We know theyre a comfort item blahblahblah. He hates himself for valuing them more than he values Tubbo. He's literally innocent in this. He’s been horribly manipulated by Dream to believe that the discs are worth anything. Theyre really not worth anything if they are being used as tools rather than, yknow, discs. My poor boy. He doesnt trust people, so what can he trust? The discs. But then he says it out loud and realises he misses Tubbo and he wants to be with his best friend again and and and WAHHHH. This also isnt really character growth its just fucking sad leave me alone.

Anyways what the fuck guys. @ Niki and Jack what the fuck. Yeah we get it it’s miscommunication but wtf. Kinda worried that the actual lore will make Niki and Jack’s hatred of Tommy justified in some way and take on a big victim-blamey vibe, but I’m hoping that everyone is smart enough to not do that. I cannot praise Tommy enough for how he’s portrayed his character. I’m currently hoping that he himself understands the true complexity of it all. I’m sure he does.

Mostly though im actually pissed off at all the people praising tommy's character for 'maturing' when hes literally just got trauma. Nice one, tumblr and twt users. Thanks. Great job. He hasnt 'learnt his lesson', he’s traumatised. What the fuck.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk, leave your responses in the reblogs and comments.

#dreamsmp #dream smp #character analysis #dreamsmp analysis #analysis #critical #tommyinnit #tubbo #dream #technoblade #wilbur soot #tw trauma #tw abuse #tw gaslighting #tw manipulation

92 notes · View notes

basketcasemp3 · 3 years

Note

Hi can you please give your thoughts on ep4 and what you think about the last, like, 10 minutes of the episode?

I loved Allison taking charge and also taking care of Patty and also coming clean about what the drugs were for and telling Patty off and telling her what kind of person Kevin really is and. God it’s so good and so sad.

My theory is that Patty didn’t know the depths of Kevin and what he’s capable of, partially because she wasn’t close to Allison and didn’t know her side until that night. I thought her “it seemed harmless” was more her realizing what exactly was going on all this time.

i feel the same way! i loved that they basically spent the whole episode having all these characters say or imply that patty was more "street smart" and therefore "stronger" than allison because she has this sweet housewife vibe to her but when there was an actual situation that needed someone to take control of, it was her instead of patty. this reaction is probably a preview of whats to come for allison, in terms of being able to take control of her own life, as well as how she might possibly handle it if she does actually kill kevin

as for patty, im really glad that allison came clean to her about how she feels. patty is supposed to be this representation of the "one-of-the-guys" girls where we're supposed to think that shes happier hanging with neil & kevin than allison and she represents the toxicity that can come with that. in the 3rd ep, we basically have confirmation that shes not happier that way and would actually prefer to be with allison than dealing with whatever stupid shit neil & keving were doing, which i find very interesting for her. patty only had her brother & dad growing up, so i think we're supposed to take that for her being comfortable with men, but theres a reason she was so quick to let allison be her friend. her saying "it seemed harmless" was, for me, her realizing that the stupid shit kevin was doing wasnt funny because it was hurtful. and it wasnt harmless because it did actual harm. i dont think she ever really considered before that allison has to face consequences for the things that kevin does, and that her alignment with kevin before the show started was an encouragement of his behavior. obviously, im not blaming patty for any of the things kevin does but i loveee that shes seeing where allison is coming from and realizes that her own behavior was hurting someone else. the through-line in the episode of allisons anxiety over not answering her phone when kevin called ending with kevin literally calling the cops on them was, imo, what opened pattys eyes to kevins childish behavior actually being like. at the very least, unhealthy. its hard to find out that someone you like is actually a really shitty person and that line of "he was harmless" is clinging onto this idea that hes a good person, but after saying it, she pretty much knows that her friend actually sucks! the shows told us that shes a good person, so i think she understands that "jokes" arent funny when theyre hurtful and she probably feels some shame from participating in something that caused allison pain

pattys seen allisons behavior up until this point, and i think their conversation at the end of the episode makes her add up all the little things in her own head. shes intuitive enough to understand that allisons desperation wasnt from trying to get away from a stalker, it was from trying to get away from kevin. its not just that he called her hundreds of times in 1 day because he simply couldnt handle being on his own or how he called the cops or the anecdote about allisons former job, its all of it plus the in-between "shenanigans" that we havent even seen, stacked up on top of each other with a nice big label of "selfish pattern of destructive behavior thats ruining allisons life." this conversation happened wayy before i thought it would but im glad it did because its a turning point in allison & pattys friendship, now that allisons true motives are revealed. i find it so interesting that allison just. told her what she wanted to do, instead of other shows that would probably have patty find out in some convoluted murder mystery way. the show is about allison wanting to murder kevin but its not! the point isnt whether or not shes gonna do it/get away with it, its about how and why shes planning it in the first place. and i certainly dont think that pattys gonna be on-board for murder in the next episode, so i hope they spend awhile having these 2 women exploring the choices that allison actually has to escape her life and what both of them are willing to live with

#kevin can f**k himself #kcfh spoilers #ik from pattys pov she doesnt know this but kevin doing an escape room from marriage #and being annoyed at the nice thing allison did for him (preparing his dinner) while also calling her a bunch of times #and then when allison finally called him upset abt the cops and he was like 'aw what if someone had stolen my car :(' 🔪🔪🔪#ask #the problem is im coherent in my head but once i try writing it down it all becomes a jumble #so i hope this is what you were looking for?#anyway thank you for asking me smth that i could think abt at work all day #text

17 notes · View notes

finelythreadedsky · 4 years

Note

hiya!! i know that this is basically your whole blog jsnsjxnjd but do ya have more thoughts on the whole "retroactively grantin agency to female characters isnt always the best thing" thing?

I think this is a three-pronged thing and the points are Lavinia, Helen, and Persephone:

I talked about Ursula Le Guin’s Lavinia some here and specifically responded to that idea, because Le Guin does something really interesting in terms of agency. Lots of retellings function to resist the culture of the myth, a culture in which women, mythical or real, are not supposed to have power or agency or ability to make their own choices or take action. So they give the character the agency to stand outside of the text and chafe against those shackles. And Le Guin says that’s impossible, the character only exists within the text. She’s not imprisoned by the text that denies her agency, she IS the text. It’s not that Lavinia has no agency because she’s a woman, it’s that she has no agency because she’s a character. Aeneas equally has no agency. (I think this approach works specifically well with Vergil because the Aeneid is just Like That in terms of fate and the power of the author and the gods, not sure how it would go to come at Homer like that, although Helen in the Iliad does seem strikingly similar to Vergil’s Aeneas and Le Guin’s Lavinia in that regard, simultaneously able to look at the text as if from the outside and unable to separate herself from it and aware of her inability to escape it.)

And Helen really embodies how agency is sometimes equivalent to blame. Someone in this story did something wrong. Either Paris (and/or Aphrodite, by forcing Helen to fall in love with him) committed the wrong by abducting a woman against her will, in which case Helen did nothing wrong and was merely a passive figure and it’s Paris (and/or Aphrodite) on whom the blame for the Trojan War rests, or Helen went willingly with him and thus committed the wrong herself and is therefore to be blamed for all the men who died at Troy. To say that Helen has agency, has the ability to make her own choices, is to say that she actively, freely, and knowingly made the wrong choice and is to blame for it. And this is a conversation that has been happening since antiquity! Gorgias argues that Helen possesses neither agency nor blame. Stesichorus comes to the same conclusion, denying that she was in possession of agency or is deserving of blame. His denial that she has agency is an assertion that she is not the villain in this story. Agency doesn’t do much when you cannot change what happens in the story and who is harmed by those happenings and the only thing you can really ascribe is blame when you decide who wanted those things to happen as they did or who caused them.

And Persephone is the other side of what it means to add agency when you cannot change what happens in the story but you can change who wants it to happen. Because to give Persephone agency in her story is to turn a story of rape into a story of romance. The only way you can have it so that she is in control of her own story is to say that actually she wanted her rape and abduction to happen. And I have said a LOT on here about that at this point but what I want to emphasize is that it’s okay to tell a story about a woman who does not have agency. It may even be a more important story to tell. @chthonic-cassandra talks some about agency here and @teashoesandhair makes a corollary point that I think is important: that to insist that Persephone is the agent of her own descent into the Underworld “sends the message that a strong woman always has agency”— that a loss of agency is permanent, that to have one’s personhood and autonomy violated at one time permanently strips a woman of them, that once a woman has been raped she can never again truly be the arbiter of her own decisions. And to insist that Persephone must have agency and be an active agent in her relationship to Hades and descent into the Underworld ignores the fact that real women historically were and still are stripped of their agency and ability to make decisions about their own lives and bodies. Is it not also important to tell those stories? Is it not important to acknowledge the reality that rape and assault and abuse and forced marriage happen, and that the women to whom those things happen are still people and still have futures and personhood and autonomy and still deserve stories? Do we not owe it to the ancient women whose experiences went into this story and Persephone’s lack of agency in it, and to the women today who are still reflected in that? It’s the “retroactively” part I want to get into— there’s a reason she doesn’t have agency already. I want to resist the pressure to add agency to this story and insist that Persephone’s LACK of agency does speak directly to a cultural reality in the society from which that story comes, and that same reality still exists in the cultures that read and receive the story today, and that’s important.

(Louise Gluck’s Persephone the Wanderer has, I think, a very interesting and complex reading of the story in terms of agency and where we want to see it and how and why we read for agency or a lack of agency)

#i really need to reread averno i keep coming back to individual poems but it is a full cycle as a whole #also i REALLY need to finally read that aimee hinds eidolon article #it is only an 11 minute read!#but something about eidolon giving a time estimate makes it very hard for me to start any article no matter how short #mine #ask #anonymous #retellings #persephoneposting #this is a torch song #Anonymous

332 notes · View notes

ecoamerica · 22 days

Text

youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

6K notes · View notes

yellowbluemoonshine · 4 years

Note

There is always the idea that villains need to be punished for what they did but... when you see someone like Shigaraki, what could be more of a punishment than what he suffered? And more than that, how could the society jugde him when they are for a big part responsable of what he has become? When Shigaraki says that he can't forgive anyone, I can't help but agree: how could he forgive when nobody recognise they have wronged him, when they don't admit he is THEIR victim?

Definitely agreed, anon.

First, this role is literally forced on him by people around him.

Even when he was 5 years old, he wasnt allowed to be the person he wants to be. He wanted to be a hero but his father punished him for it.

After his family’s tragic death, he became a tool of manipulative, selfish man. AFO literally groomed him to be force of destruction, he made him believe that this is the only way for him.

AFO literally punished Shigaraki when he cried and hold his feelings (calling him pathetic to make him feel guilty for being a disappointing is also punihsment too) and praised him when he killed people.

Then, every hero and villain he met dehumanized him again and again. For everyone, Shigaraki is someone who enjoys from destruction, empty, cruel guy, he is not even a person. Again and again, Shigaraki is not allowed to be his own person.

Heroes dont listen to him cause Shigaraki has to be bad guy so that heroes can be good guys. If Shigaraki is monster, they can justify their violence. This is how villains are treated in society. And Shigaraki is one of the biggest examples of it. Even though, heroes have many proofs to believe that Shigaraki is victim.

Everyone around Shigaraki already decided the role Shigaraki play for him, his life, his narrative is always controlled by others. He himself even believes that he is monster cause everyone around him says so.

Not only this role forced on him but also his biggest motivation and desire literally relate to what happened to him.

Shigaraki’s biggest motivation is comes from his pain, death of his family, like how he will never feel okay. This is why he is doing what he is doing cause he literally have no idea how to handle his pain.

Shigaraki’s life is full of pain. He was traumatized againd and again. He was groomed in very unstable and dangerous environment. Treated as monster that needs to be destroyed. When he finally a little far away from his abuser AFO, he still did what he wants him to do and eventually came back to him to surgery, he almost loose his humanity and his will.

And Shigaraki’s biggest desire is freedom cause his life and his choices taken away from him. Shigaraki again and again chose freedom cause he doesnt want the role everyone forced on him. He feels trapped and full of anger cause he is completely not okay with his current life.

Shigaraki is trapped in cycle of abuse.

Step 1;

He holds his negative feelings inside of him, until he reaches his breaking point. He hold himself cause he hasnt taught how to handle those emotions healthy way.

Step 2;

He reaches his breaking point and lashing his feeling out to other people. Killing them, harming them, destroy things etc. He is lashing out cause thats how he has been taught. After lashing out, he somehow reliefs a little and feel empty.

Step 3;

After remember what he did to others, he feels exteremely guilty and starts punishing himself. He is harming himself, thats the way of Shigaraki punishing himself. Punishment is always part of Shigaraki’s character.

Step 4;

Harming himself eventually led him to feel unfair and he starts to feel angry again, he hold those feelings so basically we returned back to step 1, again.

Shigaraki is literally trapped with this cycle and cant get rid of it. This is why he almost always contracting with himself.

First, someone/something hurts him and Shigaraki fights back,

he fights back to get rid of this cycle cause he wants this pain to be over. He wants freedom thats why he rejects giving his will to AFO, this is why he get rid of hands.

But eventually, he still thanking AFO, doing what he wants

and taking hands with him again cause he doesnt believe he deserves freedom.

Basically, Shigaraki wants freedom, he wants to be saved but he cant fight for his freedom cause he himself believes he doesnt deserves to be saved, to feel okay. This is the biggest proof of that he feels exteremly guilty from what he did/does.

He literally escapes from cage to another cage, in this picture.

Shigaraki is trying to escape from his cage but he doesnt believe he deserves to feel good, this is why he turns back to the cage. Thats the reason he accept the surgery of Ujiko. So basically, his mindset is already like a prison and it harms him a lot. And as long as he believes he doesnt deserve anytihng good, he cant get out that prison. But Shigaraki feels guilty, this is why he believes that. Shigaraki doesnt even see himself as victim cause noone else does.

This is why Shigaraki cant get out of this cycle, this prison and this is why it so important that someone reaching out to him. He is a victim, a person and he needs to be seen as like that by someone.

And Shigaraki’s story is all about how different his life would be, if only someone reach out to him. Again and again, theme of his story is there were people who could’ve helped him but they still didnt do anything for him. Shigaraki can be saved but everyone already believes that he is irredemable, they wont even try to reach out to him.

How can Shigaraki forgive those people when they constantly turned a blind eye to him?

Even when Shigaraki show his true face to them, trying to talk and reach out to them, they still ignored him. Shigaraki is trying to explain himself to heroes cause he still waits for heroes to save him in his deep.

The biggest proof of that there is a hope for Shigaraki is that despite his background, the way he treats league and he tries to break this cycle. The way Shigaraki treats his comprades literally turned league to found family for people like them. Shigaraki was raised to destroy but he is the reason that people in league are slowly healing from their trauma. He also fight against the unfair society that let them fall at first place.

Shigaraki is blowback of society. Though, AFO would kidnap Shigaraki anyway but he is still failure of heroes. If Allmight didnt make society ignorance, people wouldnt ignore Shigaraki. If society was designed to rehabilite villains, then they would understand his victim and try to reach out to him. They could’ve do that easily in USJ arc. If Nana never abandoned his son or Gran Torino and Allmight tried to check him out, AFO wouldnt capture Tenko. etc etc etc. Society and heroes failed Shigaraki and let him fall from the cracks of society

If Shigaraki is victim of society, heroes, then, society,heroes should take responsibilty for the victims, not just destroying them.

And Shigaraki isnt just blowback of society, his actions also waking people up. Story made it clear, society is not good the way it is and heroes dont even try to change it. Yeah, destruction isnt really solution and murder is bad but at least, Shigaraki’s actions will change things. Society wil start to change for better cause Shigaraki, the shadow of society is calling them out.

And again;

if society is the one who is responsible for Shigaraki became who he is, then how they can have a right to not forgive him?

(Though, Deku doesnt really know things here but hope, he will eventually understand.)

The one who made a choice wasnt really Shigaraki, it was people around him. First, he was outcasted and became their victim. Then, they forced a role for him. When he played his role, they punished him for it. Shigaraki was put in an impossible sitution and he was expected to handle that sitution. Who is the one really at fault here?

Everyone blames Shigaraki cause thats easiest way. Even though, Shigaraki didnt have much choices in his life but somehow its still his fault and the ones who could’ve helped him, the one who can help him chose to not help have a right to not forgive him.

So basically;

Society and heroes already failed Shigaraki and directly responsible from his fall. There is something they could do, there is something they still can do about Shigaraki but they constantly choosing to dehumanize him.

Shigaraki constantly fights against the people who dehumanize him for his humanity. At least, he is doing his best cause he doesnt want to stay like this.

He is trying to change things to break this broken cycle, both for himself and in his deep, society can be better place for people like him, victims, outcasts.

There is no point of killing Shigaraki since society creates its own villains, then they would create another Shigaraki anyway.

Shigaraki already feels exteremely guilty from what he does. (This is the reason he is so suicidal cause he sees no worth about his life.)

Shigaraki’ s life is full of pain and trauma. He is already treated as monster in his current sitution.

So whats the point of killing him or sending him the place like Tartarus? When society is the one responsible for him the way he is? When he already feels guilty? When he already live his life like a prisoner? When he already have a life full of pain and treated as thing? There is literally no point here.

So what i am hoping is in the end;

He should live cause he deserves to healing and living his life as an invidual. He should be in a place more like mental hospital cause he has severe mental illness and he definitely needs help. He also needs/deserves to live in healthy environment so he can finally heal. Even in the end, if he stays in prison, prison should be pretty human place. It would be better, if he is with with league cause those people are healing when they are together.

Though, i still hate the idea of him being in prison, even though he killed many people cause his life is already like a prison but i dont know author would do that.

Also, i also believe that more than Shigaraki, society is the one that owes him apology, not really other way around. Since he is their victim. Though he is really kind and forgiving person in deep, he might forgive them but i dont want what happenned to him to be ignored so i truly hope heroes, society, story pays him well cause its just so sad and unfair. He deserves better.

Also, i truly believe Shigaraki can help Deku and heroes a lot about outcasts since he can reach out to people who wasnt saved by heroes. So if they work together, Deku can be a hero who saves everyone and Shigaraki’s dream of becoming hero can happen since he is helping outcasts. Also this can be another a way of paying his crimes too.

Shigaraki would willing to do this cause all he wants is better society, just like Deku, in his deep. And also his biggest desire is to be an invidual. To be the person who he wants to be. He still wants to be a hero cause in his deep, he cares about greater good too.

Shigaraki is always a character who is meant to be saved and there is a reason that he is parallel with Deku. I hope he also gets the happy ending he truly deserves. We will see. It kinda became messy post cause i am kinda tired. Well, just my opinions, :))).

#anon #shigaraki tomura #hero society #i wanna talk about character analysis and my favorite ships #ahhh i am really tired #bnha analysis #mha meta #shigaraki deserves better

106 notes · View notes

unambiguouslybi · 3 years

Note

I am bisexual and have known for a very long time. At the moment I am dating a boy, who I have been dating for over two years now.

He does not accept that I'm bisexual. Recently he asked me; "Can you please be normal? Can't you try for me? I just want you to be normal." Him saying this broke my heart. He really hurt my feelings and made me think about our relationship a lot. He told me he "loves me but doesn't accept what I am".

Is there anything I can do to make him change his mind about my sexuality? To make him accept me? Everything he has said has made me feel really bad about myself and has also made me think about my sexuality a lot more than if he would have just been acceptant. (Ironic isn't it)

Are there any people who have experience with this and how to handle it?

hi!!! to be blunt, i think you should dump your boyfriend.

to actually answer your question though, theres not much you can do to make him change his mind. you can do your best to educate him you can show and explain to him that being bisexual is normal and that theres nothing wrong with you for being bisexual but at the end of the day if hes not willing to accept it or your identity than theres nothing you can do to make him see things your way. really it sounds like he biphobic, im not sure if he lives with the mindset that bisexual people are more likely to cheat or what or why he feels the way he does. finding out why he thinks the way he does will help you to address the issue and talk to him more.

but more than anything i encourage you to realize that you deserve better than this, you shouldnt have to expend extra energy to convince your partner that theres nothing wrong with you and honestly the more i type up this reply the more and more i worry that other things of a similar nature might occur. if hes unwilling to accept your identity and is already harassing you for it when it doesnt effect your relationship at all then what else will he have a problem about? what other aspects of you and your life will he try and control or change? do you see where im going with this, anon?

if you think talking with him will honestly help and fix up everything than go ahead but honestly this could just be a sign that this boy isnt right for you, id hate for your relationship with him to turn into something toxic and harmful and as things are right now it's already causing you distress. you are deserving of a partner who will love, accept and respect you for who you are no matter what. love shouldnt come with such arbitrary conditions. you deserve a partner who wont imply that you are abnormal simply for being yourself. your partner should think that you are wonderful and perfect for just being yourself.

no matter which you choose though, whether you talk to him or leave him for someone who will actually treat you properly, just be sure that the choice is yours and yours alone. dont let anyone force you to make a decision okay?

please take good care of yourself 💖

-Mod Ky

#ask #answered #tw biphobia #slight abuse ment #i think #please ask to tag #because im not sure im tagging right #advice

11 notes · View notes

tinysatansierra-blog · 3 years

Text

Markiplier manor is toxic here’s why

So Markiplier manor (Markipliers official discord server) has gotten a surplus of new people in it, this happened a few weeks ago the manor itself though has been up for awhile. originally a members only server it was eventually opened up for everyone and yes there are alot of genuinely good people and the mods are alright but unfortunately its becoming a toxic environment.

SO EDIT i have discussed with the mods that being said ... im keeping this up as a reminder of we can do better we can help people who are struggling through something instead of shutting them down we can listen to people who are being oppressed and bravely point out new media that only worsens that oppression and stigmatization and not just the mods who i was kind of harsh towards but who are human everyone as a community can do better and this is a large community think of the work we can do just doing the basics like boycotting problematic content and helping those who cry out for it who need it (and noticing and shutting down manipulative/toxic behaviors) ... i dont know if im going to go back to the manor yet tho im going to let this sit give it a week yall can agree or disagree but know that if you try to be an ass your going to get shut down and your feelings are going to get hurt

lets start with the basics “triggering topics” triggering topics can be anything in particular but it generally means a topic that relates to another persons trauma. Now while it is important to acknowledge a persons trigger words and try to keep the conversation respectable ive also noticed people use it to shut down people who come on freaking out because their dealing with a stressful situation/something traumatic just happened. This has happened to me personally and to a friend with me it was about being pro choice and having to in short make that actual choice. i was discussing this in the bathroom because i (like anyone else who comes in with baggage) did not know about any pro choice discords at that moment and was afraid of being stigmatized or going onto a discord that says its a safe space only for it to be filled with trolls. Mark manor is labeled as a safe space and many people come on there looking for support with me no one told me that the topic was triggering to them (which apparently it was because a friend of theirs had to make the choice not her herself think what you will) they just went to a mod early on when i just found the server as a member a friend (who i wont name) had gotten.... assaulted majority of her werent online and as someone who has been there and yes when she told me it did trigger my own trauma she needed moral support... the mod shut her down and deleted her comments and didnt give her a pointer to any other discord where she could discuss the topic openly and get moral support and be pointed to resources (it actually took me ten minutes to find and confirm a lgbtq therapy chat earlier this year for another individual discussing mental health) this was before i had gotten on for that day but i noticed those messages and i contacted her when she told me what was up yea it triggered my memories and its not fun but I FUCKING HELPED HER i made sure she went to the police to atleast file a statement (while the police dont always help it is good to have it on file) i even made her a plush and shipped it out to her and i would do it again and again because its not good to basically tell another person to shut up because it triggers others not without atleast trying to help them find another fucking place and making sure their actually ok and in a physical safe place next is them claiming the manor is a “safe space” a safe space is by definition “ a place or environment in which a person or category of people can feel confident that they will not be exposed to discrimination, criticism, harassment, or any other emotional or physical harm.” you would also think that the manor would be a safe space in the fact that marginalized and oppressed groups of people would be able to point out problematic content and have an open and free discussion about it and how it makes them uncomfortable. especially people of lgbtq community which alot of people in that chat are. yesterday (and this was what caused me to officially turn away from the server) in the patio (which is the members only chat) a Transgender individual pointed out the problematic content that is huniepop and how it fetishizes trans people as well as other minorities now this game i hear tries to make itself out as a “parody” .... its not its a sexual dating sim what would make it a parody is if sex noises were replaced with donkey sounds and the lewd pictures were replaced with poorly drawn doodles of tits or what have you its a game for incels marks hilarious when he plays it because he doesnt take the game seriously my issue isnt with him its with the developer. and if you did not know (which apparently people dont) the character poli is described as “a girl with a dick” the individual pointed this out because they felt like it dehumanizes them and paints them as nothing more than a fetish... and also apparently you can “choose” is poli is trans which kind of gives off the message that people can ignore trans peoples identity if it makes them uncomfortable... or if they dont sexualize them. and the muslim community is more or less in the same boat i come from the bible belt in usa im not muslim i am not trans but i do have a reason for standing with both and i will get to that in a bit so i was raised in a christian household in a christian setting like muslim women were basically told we cannot have sex and any sexual thought is sinful and we will be punished blah blah blah your even more closeted if your gay or bi because then you can face ... violence that being said to make the woman from the middle east hyper sexual like they did is kind of shitty even for a incel pleasing sex game. the individual who thought it would be ok to discuss this in the server because its labeled as a safe space and is generally “lgbtq” friendly thus believing he would have people agree and discuss ... was unceremoniously shut down by their peers and a mod was notified this person was not hostile maybe a bit frustrated because he wanted to talk about it and thought he would have this genuinely helpful conversation and people would listen and spread the word because to have problematic content be popular can isolate the oppressed group even more so WHEN NO ONE WANTS TO LISTEN TO THEM. if a group of marginalized people notice something problematic with content and you claim to be an ally of said group then you need to acknowledge and support what they say. they told him to go to twitter where he could potentially be bullied and written off ... because again its an INCEL PLEASING SEX GAME.(which means incels if you ever dealt with them will go and say anything to justify the game even using slurs and bullying) and to put the icing on the cake to change the topic they brought up robin ... i actually dont know who robin is as i dont really focus much on youtube creators personal stuff (it feels off for me to not personally know an individual but know their personal stuff without having actually talking to them its weird i know its a thing i have in my head) but apparently they recently came out as female and good for them im super proud of him and the patio members were discussing how they were proud of him as well for beginning to wear makeup and making themselves more feminine which would be great if they werent trying so hard to shut down the trans male who was trying to spread awareness on problematic stuff .... something he pointed out ... and something they gaslighted and said he was being hostile. really its almost as if they only care about trans issues when its someone famous discussing them so what can we possibly do about huniepop being transphobic and the answer is very easy BOYCOTT IT like... yall were up in arms and boycotted jk rowling with snap and a turn do we only cancel the old and ugly? do we only cancel those who we dont think is funny? mark is not at fault he probably doesnt realize it and any comments made on the issue are talked down upon or drowned amongst other comments im not saying to cancel him im saying to cancel the game HARD. ignore the posts bitch at the dev demand refunds for your game. like consumers have infinitely more power than corps want to admit. so you basically have a community that claims to be a safe space but only if you want to talk about sunshine and rainbows and its highly hypocritical of them to claim safety. another thing is emotionally abusive/manipulative people hide in the server and the mods dont ever seem to acknowledge it. i cannot tell you how many times ive gotten into arguments with people who seems nice then turn into assholes then claim to be the victim when i or others go off on them. if you recognize my name you know i dont stand down when it comes to having a snarky or rude comment thrown at me if your going to be an ass were fighting i dont care how nice you seemed beforehand and you dont get to call a mod just because i actually stood up for myself or others sorry not sorry dont be a bitch nuff said. now why would i care so much about problematic content? why would i care and stand by the transgender and muslim people (aside from being ya know... an actual ally and not someone who claims it for sympathy and brownie points?) its because i am autistic i am also able to function well on my own but there is a movie created by the famous singer sia it is called music it is a movie frowned upon by the autisitic community because infantizes and dehumanizes non verbal autistic people i am fortunate and unfortunate in not having to deal with much stigma unfortunate because i wasnt diagnosed until i was 17 alot of answers about my behavior could have been answered if i had been diagnosed earlier but considering society loves the quiet timid female and i functioned “well” for neurotypicals i was ignored. so yea you bet your ass im standing with them and raising awareness about huniepop and their was this one person when i mentioned this point i cant remember there name nor to do i give a shit about them because when i mentioned how autistic people ... how i was in the same boat with music by sia (again i advise that no one target the actress who was under contract target sia and please boycott her so she knows she cant get brownie points or money for a movie that stigmatizes who she claims she wants to “help” (*cough* profit off of *cough cough*) and only serves as a feel good movie for neurotypicals and ignorant people) they said “i heard people who hated the movie i heard people who found it alright people are ALLOWED to like problematic content” ... and like ... does anyone else see the problem here? its not hard at all to boycott celebrities for making content and im going to repeat this point IF A GROUP OF MARGINALIZED, STIGMITIZED AND OPPRESSED PEOPLE CALL OUT SOMETHING FOR BEING PROBLEMATIC AND YOU CLAIM TO BE AN ALLY YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO THEM AND DONT SHUT THEM DOWN I DONT GIVE A SHIT YOU DONT HAVE A FUCKING EXCUSE. if you cant bring yourself to boycott a piece of media and replace it with the infinitely more suitable forms that supports the group you claim to be for your not an ally your a fucking hypocrite and that is why i left markiplier manor i am still a youtube special ... thingy member and i will continue to be a member to support mark i want people to overall listen to those who speak up against a creator and a piece of media and listen to us all no matter how “good” something seems. .. also there is a video called listen it was created by nonverbal autistic people and communicationFIRST a group that sia apparently communicated with for her movie... and then ignored https://youtu.be/H7dca7U7GI8

#markiplier #transphobia #trans pride #lgbtq #muslim #huniepop #markiplier manor #pro choice #toxic groups #toxic fanbase #sia #music the movie #problematic content #huniepop2 #albeism #hypocrisy #hypocrites #discord

17 notes · View notes

scripttorture · 3 years

Note

I have a weird scenario and i want to ask about its implications, mostly focusing on soliditary confinement aspects. So I am writing about this all powerful being who is immortal+eternally youthful (with a human like mind) who gets trapped in basically a big snowglobe created by his powers. Its a big mostly open space set inside a forest with a magic mansion to occupy him and provide him basic needs and the limits of the globe are very defined. {1/4}

{Weird anon} After some time alone he comes to create a friend to accompany him and make sure everything goes well during his absence using his powers. This friend can and does leave for periods of time to fullfill his duties but comes back. The being also realises during his imprisonment his powers dwindle with time and the globe starts to get smaller as he starts to age, meaning he will either die from old age or the globe shrinking. {2/4} {WA}After what he thinks must be a long time, his graying hair biggest indication, kids who knew about his legend come to discover him. They then bring him their older sibling, then their parents to talk and after some plot he gets to get some of his powers back and be free. (Posting my questions in the last part) {3/4} {WA} I was wondering if the confinement area being comfy and big, him having this friend would help during confinement? How could he react to aging/idea of dying? Although this isnt very possible in RL, could the fact he had to create this friend ,but mostly the fact he would have no one else if he didnt, get to him? How could he interract with kids/people who found him, i know people tend to have difficulty with interractions after time. Ty for your help! {4/4} {WA EXTRA} Forgot to mention these but 3 kids are 10 to 12, older sibling is 14-15, parents are mid thirties . Again, thank you for your time.

That’s an interesting fantasy scenario (and not even close to the weirdest thing I’ve been asked) thank you for sharing it :)

I think the first thing to grasp is that this character isn’t constantly in solitary confinement here and that’s a smart writing choice. You’ve got the character creating at least one companion and even though that companion isn’t always present that means it’s likely they’re both getting at least 1-2 hours of contact most of the time.

That doesn’t mean this isn’t a stressful situation and it doesn’t mean there are no periods of solitary confinement.

But it gives you leeway to make the effects of this fairly realistic even with the fantasy concept.

Having a big, comfortable space doesn’t really make a difference to how well people deal with isolation. Socialising is a physical need for social species like humans. But the presence of a companion makes the world of difference.

I think the first thing to decide is exactly how long it takes him to make his companion. A lot of people really overestimate the time we can withstand isolation.

For reference the safe period is about a week. After that most people will start to show symptoms and the symptoms are a lot more likely to persist after release. A month is more then enough time for the character to be seriously effected. A year is a really extreme amount of time. And by the time you start getting to multiple years the chances of suicide attempts are… significant.

With the kind of story you’re describing I get the impression you want long term effects but don’t want symptoms etc to take over the story. I think 1-3 months is a perfect time frame for that. The character would develop long term symptoms but it’s still in the realm where it’s survivable. Which means it’s less likely to take over the whole narrative.

You’ve probably seen my masterpost on solitary confinement but here it is again just in case :) I really recommend Shalev’s Sourcebook on Solitary Confinement which is linked as one of the sources on the post.

As with the symptoms of torture more generally you’ve got some scope to choose symptoms because not everyone will experience every single symptom. There’s still some debate about how common individual symptoms are. However broadly depression and anxiety seem to be very common and hallucinations are less common (though they seem to become more likely the longer someone is confined). It’s a good idea to pick a mix of physical and psychological symptoms.

If you choose insomnia as a symptom remember that sleep deprivation also causes problems which you can read about in the masterpost here.

If this is your first time writing something like this then picking out symptoms can be daunting. I try to think of it in terms of what adds to the story. I try to consider the characters, plot and overall themes. Symptoms that give you opportunities to show aspects of the character’s personality, change their relationship with other characters, highlight themes in the story and/or create interesting problems in the plot later on are all good picks.

It’s also important to consider what you’re comfortable writing and what you feel able to write. If you don’t want to write self harm for example that’s a perfectly good reason for ruling out that symptom.

I have a post that outlines my process for picking symptoms that might be helpful for you. :)

I think that brings us round to the more fantasy side of the questions.

I’ll be honest and say that I don’t know how people generally deal with the idea that they’re going to die soon. I suspect that there’d be a lot of individual variation. I think you’ll get the best answers by looking up charities that support people with terminal illnesses.

I found a couple of links at Marie Curie that might serve as a starting point. There’s this page on palliative care. This general page (with lots of links and first hand accounts) of living with a terminal illness. You might find this page about emotionally processing a terminal diagnosis helpful.

I would treat the emotional issues around the created companion the same as a character who is reliant on only one person for their social needs. Which can put a lot of weird strains on a relationship.

I’m not a psychologist and what I say here is based on impressions I gained from interviews with people who are very isolated. If you see a mental health professional or someone who studies isolation more seriously saying something different take their word over mine. Because my reading and knowledge is broad rather then deep.

Relying on one person for all your social needs isn’t healthy. We all have different needs and it’s a lot easier for those needs to be met when we’re interacting with more then one person. Being entirely reliant on one person puts a lot of pressure on that person. It can make it seem like any problems or issues the more isolated person has are the other person’s fault.

Because they’re not magically meeting all of someone’s needs. And I say ‘magically’ because it’s almost impossible for one person to do the ‘job’ of a dozen people.

There can be a lot of guilt, resentment and anger floating around in this sort of dependant relationship. Even when both parties are genuinely trying their best and trying to be healthy.

Any depressive period or severe mood swing on the part of the reliant character might be interpreted as failure by the companion. As if it’s their job to ‘fix’ the mental health problems he has. And that can lead to a lot of internalised guilt and shame.

Conversely being aware of how dependant he is could make the confined character resent the comparative freedom of his companion. They get to leave. They’ll survive the end of this snow-globe. They’ve never had to be alone as he was.

The companion has a lot of power in this scenario because the confined character is entirely reliant on them. They also have the power to leave. Knowing that can breed resentment, whether it’s rational or not. And if it’s irrational and ‘undeserved’ that can lead to a degree of self hatred and guilt.

For both parties anger at each other and the situation seems likely. Not necessarily all the time but I think it’s likely to come up over and over again.

The companion has their own desires and wants. But the confined character is entirely dependant on them and may well expect them to drop everything to help him/meet his socialisation needs. And the thing is that’s unfair on both of them, because the situation is unfair.

That’s not a critique of the story. It’s unfair for the confined character to expect the companion to be able to meet all his needs and to drop everything to help him. But it’s also not unreasonable for the confined character to grasp at his only option for fulfilling a fundamental need.

I think that if you wanted to treat this ‘realistically’ then it would lead to a pretty unhealthy co-dependant relationship however much both characters tried to avoid that.

But you do have the ability to reduce or avoid that in your story. Because you choose the rules for how this companion feels, acts and behaves.

The confined character may be human-like but in a lot of ways the companion does not have to be. A realistic human-like person would not be able to support all the social needs of another person. But there’s no reason the companion has to be that human.

If you do choose to deviate from a more human-like character I think my advice would be to think through any changes you make logically. And be consistent. If for instance the character can’t feel angry or resentful towards their creator think through what that might mean.

Which leaves the final question about interacting with others and how difficult that can be after periods of isolation.

The exact way this effects interactions depends chiefly on the symptoms you pick out and the character’s personality.

Generally mentally ill people do not want to be assholes or upset other people. But we do tend to have greater difficulties interacting with people and our social interactions can go badly in ways that healthy people don’t tend to experience.

For instance say we have a character who has a severe anxiety disorder and this disorder is often set off by noises they don’t expect. That’s a fairly common symptom and a fairly common trigger for it.

That means that kids running around, shouting or just talking loudly about something that excites them, could set off an anxiety attack.

Some people would get angry in that situation. Because they’re in pain and, even though they did not mean to, those kids ‘caused’ that pain.

Some people would abruptly remove themselves from the situation. Which could leave the kids wondering why/how they upset their new friend so much.

Some people would stick around and not blame the kids. But they might have visible signs of their anxiety attack that could be very frightening for a child who doesn’t understand what’s going on. If an adult they care about suddenly starts shaking and breathing hard and needs to sit down and looks pale- Well worry is natural. And it’s difficult to explain triggers/mental health problems while you’re in the middle of an anxiety attack.

So there’s a set of issues that are symptom driven and around the extra difficulties interacting while mentally ill. There’s also a set of issues around… basically forgetting how to socialise.

This doesn’t necessarily mean being age in-appropriate.

I think the best way to think about it is a combination of finding it harder to interpret other people’s emotional cues and being less aware of the cues they’re sending out themselves. It might take longer for the character to realise they’ve upset someone or they might misidentify the other person’s emotional response.

They might also think less before they speak. Which can mean things like- I guess not moderating what they say to account for other people’s feelings? They might come across as blunt or thoughtless or scatter brained as they jump from one topic to another. They might also have less of a grasp of when to give the other person space and let them speak.

The biggest thing I see survivors of solitary report is that normal social interaction makes them much more anxious/nervous then it did before they were confined. Socialising has a bigger ‘cost’ then before, in terms of energy and emotional impact.

And this often means they withdraw from it more quickly. They need to take breaks. Or they start getting more stressed and frustrated.

I think the main thing to navigate here would be how to explain these conditions and needs to children in a way that doesn’t seem like it’s blaming the kids. Which is certainly possible, but can take some time and care to get right.

I think I’ll leave it there and if you’ve got any further questions drop them in when the ask box reopens. I hope that helps :)

Available on Wordpress.

Disclaimer

#writing advice #tw torture #tw suicide #tw self harm #tw cancer #fantasy ask #solitary confinement #effects of solitary confinement #isolation #writing survivors #torture survivors and relationships #unhealthy relationships #terminal illness #writing symptoms

32 notes · View notes