#also to anyone that spots the song lyric: :3

[hannieehaee]

NO SONG WITHOUT YOU

18+ / mdi

summary: with zero experience or interest in the romantic aspect of his life, jihoon finds himself in an unexpected situation when his company decides on a collab between the two of you, not expecting the work-addicted producer to develop a bit of a crush on you.

content: idol!jihoon x idol!reader, afab reader, pining, jihoon's emotionally constipated, jihoon's pov, kinda inexperienced jihoon, smut, dry humping, oral (m receiving), penetrative sex, etc.

wc: 12.6k

a/n: this is probably my fave fic i've written so far!! love writing for jihoon aaaa anyways i hope u guys enjoy <3

masterlist

Jihoon was tired.

Beyond tired, actually. He couldn't remember the last time he'd left his studio at a reasonable time. He knew people on twitter made jokes about him being a bit of a hermit, with fans being able to spot his studio from outside the building, lights always on and indicating the producer was still inside.

He didn't have much of a valid excuse for this, other than being a 'workaholic', or at least that's the term Joshua had recently introduced him to, describing him as the prime example. Jihoon just couldn't help himself. He'd been like this ever since he could remember. If he had an idea, he had to work on it. And unfortunately for him, he was always full of new ideas. If Seventeen was releasing an album, that meant Jihoon already had enough material to fill up the next three albums backed up in a file somewhere in his computer.

Despite always having music prepared months in advance, - even having solo music up for grabs for whichever member desired it - he still found himself constantly working. It's not like anyone demanded this out of him either. It was quite the opposite, actually. From staff, to other producers, to members and even family, everyone always insisted that he took a break, maybe leave producing aside for a month or two. This was inconceivable to him, it was something that was simply out of his comfort zone.

The truth was, Jihoon felt lost. Any time he strayed away from work in some way or other, he didn't know what to do with himself. He felt like a failure in many other aspects of his life. Granted, he was a successful idol and producer, talented in every area necessary in his field, but past that, what did he really have to offer? He'd been stuck in a rut for a few years now. He had his members, his family, maybe some staff, but his social life didn't go much past that. He didn't have many hobbies outside of work either. Sure, he was avid when exercising, even being an overachiever in that area, but that was also kind of part of his job. He knew he needed to step out of his comfort zone at some point and live his life, but he kept making excuses for himself. He was 26 now, and was, quite frankly, beginning to lose hope in certain areas of his life due to his career, - although blaming his career was just an excuse, really - the romantic aspect of his life being one of them.

Jihoon had some experience, okay? It wasn't like he'd never liked a girl before. He'd had a few crushes in elementary, maybe even some up until high school. He'd kissed one of the female trainees back when Pledis was a smaller company (okay, it might've been on a dare, but to Jihoon it counted). A few years after debuting he'd even gone on a few dates with a former staff member from his company. He'd lost his virginity to that same girl, kind of rushing into it due to feeling pressured to just get it over with - something he didn't exactly regret, but wished had been more of a memorable moment. The point was, Jihoon had had a few romantic experiences in his past 26 years on this earth. But, he hadn't ever even gotten close to find that one great love he'd hoped he one day would. For someone who received constant accolades for his lyricism, he was never really able to relate to his own music. He'd never been heartbroken, never had an insane need for someone, never felt romantic love, never been in the throes of passion with a beautiful girl, even. It was all his imagination. His lyrics, that is. And maybe the rest, if he was being honest. He'd dreamt about it lately; the perfect girl who he'd find and sweep off her feet. But that was all it was, a dream.

So, Jihoon was tired. Tired of hauling himself up in his studio to make himself feel something. But that was where he now found himself; stuck and in a rut, hoping for something more.

He was once again in his studio, working on god knows what at this point. He had just finished a quick welive with carats, feeling like he'd accomplished his quota of socialization for the day (I mean, even if it was a one-way conversation, it still counted, right?) and decided to get to work on one of the many unfinished drafts in his hard drive. This was kind of routine by now. He would either get a quick meal with one of the members during their break from rehearsals, or would go back to his studio for a bit to work on music. This would've been fine and dandy if it wasn't for the fact that Jihoon would eventually have ended up right back at his stuido either way. It was the illusion of choice, truly.

He spent a few hours in there, messing around with his guitar and even working on some guides for the members to follow next time they had some time to stop by the Universe Factory. Today felt like a productive day for Jihoon. Granted, he did this literally every single day, but he hadn't felt stuck at any point today. Maybe he was on a lucky streak. He decided to cut the day short there, not wanting to ruin what had been arguably an uninterrupted day of working on music. However, his separation from his studio did not last long, as he received a call from his manager just as he was locking the door behind him. He picked up without much thought.

"What's up?"

"Hey? Jihoon-ah, are you still in the studio by any chance?", Jihoon almost vocalized his amusement at the question. Where else would he be?

"I was just locking up, but yeah, I'm here."

"Good! Stay right there! Gonna head up to talk to you for a bit," and with that he hung up, not leaving Jihoon any chance to respond.

Jihoon and his manager were quite close. This was the case with most idols and their managers, having to spend so much time together. Still, Jihoon found the interaction to be a bit odd. Usually his manager would be one of the many people to insist that Jihoon get his ass out of his studio every once in a while. He didn't mind his request, though, so he quickly reopened the door and sat himself back down on his chair, deciding to mess with a few things as he waited for his manager's arrival.

It took his manager about ten minutes to arrive, Hybe was quite a big building, after all. He knocked on his door, not knowing the access code to Jihoon's studio. The only people who knew his key code were Jihoon himself, and Soonyoung (who had learned it without Jihoon's knowledge, but he was too lazy to change it by now). He got up to open the door, simply expecting another one of his manager's short overviews of Jihoon's schedule for the week, which might've been correct, except that when he opened the door he was met with his manager accompanied by an unfamiliar face.

It was you. Jihoon didn't know exactly who you were, but you carried a familiar air to you. He hadn't really been interacting with many people as of late, so maybe you were just someone he'd seen in passing, he wasn't too sure. You and his manager walked in upon Jihoon's gesture to please come in, moving aside as to not be in your way. He closed the door behind you, accidentally closing the distance between the two of you for a second and becoming a bit flustered at the proximity. He wasn't sure why his manager would bring someone unknown into his studio, but if Jihoon was anything, he was a relaxed guy (or at least he tried to seem like it), so he just sat back down without making any questions, his manager would probably fill him in any moment now anyways.

"Okay, so this is Y/N! You've probably met before, right?"

Uh, not right. And now a little awkward. Was he supposed to lie?

"Oh! No, we haven't, actually. I know a few of his members, though, but this is our first time officially meeting," you spoke up for the first time. So you were friends with his members? That might be how he knew you. That didn't really narrow it down much, though. There were 12 of them, and Seungkwan alone was friends with practically the entire industry.

"Oh? My bad. Well, then I should introduce you, right? Jihoon, this is Y/N! Her group was just recently acquired by Hybe. They moved into the building just over a month ago, if I'm not mistaken," He turned to you as you nodded in affirmation before proceeding, "Y/N, this is Jihoon, producer and partial leader of Seventeen."

He wasn't too sure why he was introducing the two of you. If he got personally introduced to every group Hybe acquired in the past year, he'd probably be here all day. He'd stopped keeping track of who and which groups were now roaming the hallways, being too many for him to count. He wasn't complaining or anything, he was just confused as to why go out of his way.

"Woozi-nim. It's so nice to meet you! I've always been such a huge fan. Your work is .. it's insane. I've looked forward to meeting you for so long," the enthusiasm with which you said this made his lip quirk up a little. Sure, he received accolades on his work every day, but knowing that fellow juniors of his looked up to him always brought a smile to his face, although it still made him a little sheepish at receiving such a forward compliment.

"Oh, I- Thank you. And you can call me Jihoon. It's nice to meet you, too," he smiled shyly at you, not really knowing what to say past that. He felt a bit shy looking at you for some reason, as if he couldn't hold eye contact for too long or he'd burn.

He looked expectantly over at his manager, the instigator of this interaction.

"Oh! Right. Well, as I just said, Y/N's group just moved into the company. And the company's been pushing for some collaborations as of late, you know, in order to maximize all groups within Hybe all at once," Jihoon could kind of see where his manager was going with this, "So, I've brought Y/N along with me since you two will be working together for a feature."

Hold on. Rewind.

"Us? As in just us two?"

"Yeah. Hybe is dividing you guys into subdivisions. Mingyu will be collaborating with someone in BTS a few months from now, and Chan will be with Yeonjun from TXT. I think Seokmin is scheduled with a member of Lesserafim. Not too sure yet, but you're up first. I sent you an email about it a few days ago with the general idea. Did you not get it?"

Oh, right. Jihoon was always quite diligent about his work, but his work mostly entailed Seventeen only. Checking his email wasn't much of a habit of his when he could just call up the few producers that worked for Seventeen whenever he needed to. Collaborations and producer work for other people were not that common to him, so for the most part he would disregard anything that didn't entail his own group.

"Oh, I, uh. No, sorry," he felt slightly bad at having disregarded the person standing in front of him, specially when you had regarded him such such respect. He was giving off a terrible first impression.

"That's fine. Now you know. Well, just wanted to take advantage that you were here today - Hah, well, when aren't you here?", chuckled his manager before continuing, "Just wanted to introduce you just in case. Check the email I sent you when you can, I'll send you over more details of your schedule related to the feature first thing tomorrow, yeah? Y/N here is the main producer for her group too, so you'll be co-producing."

You produced? He didn't mean to sound like an asshole, but there were just so many groups who didn't make their own music. He could sometimes get a bit of an ego over knowing he was an anomaly in his industry, always having taken pivotal part in a good 90% of his group's discography. Still, he wasn't too happy about the concept of having to share the creative process with a producer he had never heard of, if he was quite honest. For the most part he would only work with Bumzu and a few other Hybe producers here and there. He didn't even know your group or the music you were credited for. Hell, he had only found out about this project two minutes ago, having had no voice in the matter. One of the down sides of joining such a huge company that fathered way too many groups at once, he guessed.

He decided to not show his slight discomfort towards the idea, simply offering a polite response before bidding his goodbyes to the two of you. You had stayed behind for a few extra seconds after his manager exited the room, once more voicing your admiration for Jihoon and letting him know you were looking forward to working together. Jihoon had to admit that your praise did something to him. He didn't mean to sound like a total loser when he said this, but he did not interact with girls too much. So receiving such direct praise on his music from a pretty girl who also happened to share a passion with him had his ears turning red. He quickly shook his head at the thought, deciding to just stay at the studio overnight once more and maybe finally go over the email his manager had sent him.

He had to admit, he was quite impressed. Shortly after your arrival he had decided to research you and your group. You were quite well known by then, having debuted the same year as Seventeen and now being one of the top girl groups in the game. Just like Jihoon, you were from a small company and had climbed your way up, eventually being acquired by Hybe just a few months prior. Your stories were quite similar, if he really thought about it. You had also taught yourself how to produce before debuting, taking on the official role of main producer upon making your debut.

He had found out an embarrassing amount of information about you very quickly. He couldn't help himself. He was immediately intrigued by you, even going as far as looking at online forums about you; places that would detail information about you that only a true fanatic would know. He was now privy to trivial information such as your birth year (one year after his), your favorite color (pink), how many moles you had (seven, total), when you joined your company (exactly two months before he joined pledis), your most popular fancam (the one were you wore that pretty purple top), and just general information he'd be embarrassed to relay he now had memorized. He could call himself a bit ... infatuated. He felt beyond creepy, despite all this being public information. He had just met you, why had he just spent the past three hours binging content about you?

Jihoon decided to shrug these thoughts away, instead opting to mentally prepare himself for tomorrow morning, which was apparently the first day in which you'd be meeting to talk over your future schedules together for the next month or so. He had finally checked the multiple emails his manager had sent him about the collaboration, realizing that he'd now have to spend most of his non-Seventeen allocated time with you.

From photoshoots for promo, to the actual producing of the song, the empty slots in his schedules seemed to have filled up on their own, now being occupied by your company, and much to his surprise, he was not annoyed at this sudden intrusion. He felt a weird feeling in his stomach, but it wasn't like the usual nerves he felt before going on an important stage, nor the grumbling he felt whenever he met an idol of his. He felt ... giddy? He was looking forward to it. He felt nervous to see you again, which was really strange considering that he felt completely normal upon meeting you just now. Yeah, you were very pretty (he had eyes, this was just a fact he couldn't deny), but he hadn't had much of a reaction to it. However, now, as he looked at pictures of you on his computer, he couldn't imagine holding eye contact again. He was going mad.

Tomorrow arrived sooner than he thought. Now he was now sitting in his studio, awaiting your arrival. He had impulsively tidied up the place, now embarrassed that you'd seen it a mess the day prior. He also tidied himself up. As he recalled, you were wearing a pretty dress yesterday, so he felt bad you'd caught him in sweats and a three-day-old shirt. He wasn't sure why he wanted to impress you, but he did. Jihoon had the hope of at least befriending you, now having formed some type of interest towards you.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door, making his heart accelerate at the thought of who was on the other side of it. Upon unlocking it, he found you on the other side, smile on your face as you carried in some bowls of .. his favorite meal? into his studio.

"Hi, Woozi-nim! I brought you food, is that's okay? I asked Seungkwan what you liked," oh, so it was Kwannie you were friends with. That made sense. It was touching that you'd gone out of your way to get him something you knew he'd like. Now he felt bad at being empty handed in his own studio.

"Oh, I- Thank you. You didn't have to do that."

"It's no problem! Wanted to thank you for doing this. I know you don't do collaborations that often. Felt kinda bad about imposing," by now the two of you had sat down in front of his desk, chairs slightly too close for comfort as you unwrapped the food in the bags you'd brought in.

"You-you're not. Sorry if I made it seem that way yesterday, hah, I was just caught off guard."

Jesus Christ, he felt so awkward. Your close proximity had him at a loss. He didn't know where to look or what to say. Your perfume was also not helping matters. The pretty scent had him extremely distracted, his mind suddenly being flooded with the thought that, shit, everything about you was pretty. What was wrong with him? Was this his first time interacting with a woman? He had never felt more out of place, except that despite any improper feelings he felt, he still wanted to be in your vicinity.

"-Woozi-nim?"

Shit, had you been talking this whole time?

"Oh, I'm sorry. What were you saying?"

You chuckled at him, clearly not taking offense to his distracted nature, "I was just asking if you had any drafts you wanted to use as a baseline? Or we could use one of my unused drafts? It's whatever you prefer, really. I'd love to work with something of yours, though. I love your style, it's so ... hah, I don't know. It's just so you."

Jihoon thanked god he had not cut his hair as some carats had begged, because now the length allowed him to cover the red of his ears. A single compliment from you had him heating up, clammy hands getting even clammier at the thought of you using his talent as a compliment. If you wanted to use his music, there was just no way for him to deny you. He wanted to hear more of your praise to him.

"Y-yeah? I have uh, a few that I could show you. They're just drafts, but you know."

You visibly perked up at this, scooting even closer to him as he began to fiddle with his computer, opening up some files to show you. Your excitement at his work had him swooning internally. The amount of interest you'd been showing since meeting yesterday was already getting the better of him.

"Woozi-nim, holy shit. These are hundreds of files. Are these all unfinished?"

"Uh, yeah. I uh, tend to have a few drafts saved for future projects."

"I get that. Me too, but these have to be over 300 unfinished songs," you were in clear shock (perhaps admiration?) of the endless tracks in front of you. Jihoon wasn't sure if he should feel ashamed at having so much unfinished work (which made bit feel like a bit of a loser), or be proud since you seemed to be impressed at the vast number.

"I like to be prepared. You know, just in case."

"It's .. wow. I knew you were good, but this is insane, Woozi-nim."

"I, you can call me Jihoon," he didn't really care much for the distinction between Woozi and Jihoon at this point; he was pretty used to both. But a part of him just wanted to hear you call him by his real name; the one only those close to him really used. He also wanted an out from the conversation, feeling too flustered at your compliments.

You chuckled, nodding at him, "Okay, Jihoon. Sorry, didn't really know what name to go for at first."

"No, it-it's fine. I'm only a year older. You can speak comfortably."

The rest of the conversation was filled with technicalities about the collaboration. Now that you two had established a, let's say, closer acquaintance, you were able to discuss your ideas more comfortably. Jihoon still had to put up with the endless compliments about his work as you two went through possible tracks for the song, but he tried his best to take them like a champ, simply chuckling shyly and shrugging them off. Your genuine admiration for his skill had him reeling inside, enamored with the tone of your voice any time you'd express excitement at hearing exclusive Universe Factory content. He hadn't felt butterflies in his stomach like this in, well, ever. He felt like he was a high school student with a silly crush.

The disappointment in his face as you parted ways must've been clear (which made him embarrassed beyond belief), as you pulled out your phone and asked him to put his contact in, letting him know you'd be seeing him soon. The possession of your contact info made him excited. He knew it was probably just for work purposes, but he held a stupid hope in the back of his head that you'd given it to him because you had interest in meeting again soon.

And you did see each other soon, consistently meeting in order to work on the song. A few of the times you were joined by Bumzu (who was also helping out with the song), or Soonyoung (who was just a nosy bastard who wouldn't leave Jihoon's studio), which made him curse out his two friends, wanting you all to himself. His crush had developed quickly after that second meeting. You were now all he thought about. Every morning when he got ready to start his day, he wondered which shirt you'd like him best in. Would you like if he trimmed his hair or did you like it long? What did you like in guys? (Except had already gone on incognito mode on his phone to search your ideal type, growing instantly embarrassed and exiting out of the tab). He thought of you as he exercised, wondering if you'd like his muscles and physique. His entire existence was surrounded by thoughts of you. And he hoped maybe he was also in your mind.

The first time he saw you outside his studio walls was at the Hybe gym as he worked out with Mingyu, Soonyoung and Joshua. He almost lost hold on the dumbbells in his hands upon spotting you, tight leggings and cropped shirt adorning your body. He had seen you in less clothing before (Only ever through a screen, in all the pretty concept photos your group had done, or in the occasional fancam he'd come across), but seeing your silhouette in the flesh had all thoughts leaving his mind. He felt ashamed at his way of thinking. He didn't want to objectify you like that, but the thoughts of your beauty had not left his mind for two weeks now, since the day he first met you.

But his eyes couldn't be helped, glued to your form as you walked into the place, paying extra attention to the parts that stood out most for him. He was like a depraved monster, his breath getting ragged as he watched you move around, licking his lips and sighing at every small movement you made. God, what was happening to him? Why was he so immediately aroused? Luckily, his thoughts were quickly interrupted by a cough from a very annoying Kim Mingyu, who had just been spotting him before his abrupt stop.

"Hyung .. You're too obvious."

"Wha-what are you talking about?", he did not like the smirk attached to Mingyu's face, nor the matching mocking smile in Soonyoung and Joshua's.

"You should see him when she's sitting in his studio. It's sad to watch," snickered the fellow 96-liner.

"Oh? She's the girl? Damn, hyung. She's really pretty."

"It's not- there's no girl. We're just working together," his feelings were already complicated enough, he didn't need the involvement of his members' teasing.

"C'mon, Hyung! It's okay if you like her. She's pretty, she's an idol-producer. She's perfect for you. I think you should go for it," encouraged Mingyu, in his optimistic Mingyu-fashion.

"Yeah, I mean. You were just about to cum in your pants at just seeing her in some leggings. I don't think you have anything to lose if you're already at the point of public indecency."

Yeah, this was exactly why he wanted to keep them as far away as possible.

"Soonyoung, I swear to g-"

"Jihoon? Oh my god, hi! I didn't realize you were here," it was you, now at a closer proximity and a slight sheen of sweat attached to your skin. Had Jihoon not been snapped out of his trance earlier, he probably would've been salivating by now.

"Oh. Hi Y/N. How are you?", he felt like he was being scrutinized for his every word and move by his members, which made him feel extremely awkward (more than usual).

"Good! I didn't know you used the company gym. I'd never seen you here before. You should've told me. We could've come together," you smiled before turning to his friends, "Hi! I'm Y/N, it's nice to meet you!"

Soonyoung made a show of stretching his hand out to you, bowing way too low for such a casual setting (probably just to peeve Jihoon). He was followed by Joshua, who held onto your hand in a way that had Jihoon fuming to himself.

"Hello, Y/N. I think we might've met before. You're Kwannie's friend, right?"

"Oh, right! Yeah, I've been to your guys' practice room before, but Jihoon didn't recognize me when we first met, so I wanted to re-introduce myself just in case," you giggled in Jihoon's direction.

"Don't mind him. That's just Jihoon. He's too distracted for his own good. I'm Kim Mingyu, by the way," the youngest shot you a flirtatious smile.

He needed all of them to keep the flirting as toned down as humanly possible. Although jealousy was not an emotion he felt often, the thought of his best friends even looking at you had his ears turning red in anger. But in very expected fashion, they all continued to take turns flirting with you for the next twenty minutes, completely shrugging off any intention of working out they might've had before having spotted you. Luckily (and surprisingly) for him, you were not reciprocating the flirting, nor where your eyes ever off of Jihoon for too long, always including him in your responses to his members one way or another.

You were somehow immune to the charms of Kwon Soonyoung, which, yeah, Jihoon didn't blame you for. You were also unaffected by Jisoo, which was a little more rare from Jihoon's experience. What shocked him most, though, was that your eyes still stayed on him even while one Kim Mingyu blatantly flirted with you. He'd known one too many girls who had fallen victim to his flirting (whether it be intentional or not), and to see you fully shrug him off in favor of looking to Jihoon instead had his heart going at an inhuman speed.

The interaction ended not too much time later, leaving Jihoon's ears red, but now from embarrassment at his friends slyly suggesting his interest at you multiple times throughout the conversation. Despite them being subtle about it, he was still mortified, specially when by the end of it, they'd pushed him to walk you back to your practice room while they wandered off on their own.

"I'm so sorry about them. They can be a bit much."

"It's fine, Jihoon. Don't worry about it. They were really fun. I can see how you're all so close."

"Ah, yeah. You know how it is .. Uh, sorry they kept hitting on you like that,"

he knew he was a bit of an idiot for bringing it up, but he wanted to gauge your feelings on it. He needed to know if he at least held a chance against his members or if you'd just been being nice by not reciprocating in front of him.

You chuckled as you responded, "I know they weren't being serious about it, Jihoon. Don't sweat it. It's not them I'm interested in anyways."

Oh, great. That was good to hear .. Wait. What?

"W-What?l"

"Oh. We're here. This is my group's practice room. Sorry I made you walk all the way here, I know your practice room is like five floors up," you apologized sheepishly, completely disregarding what you'd just said.

"I-it's fine. I'll see you on Thursday, then?"

"Thursday? We have a shoot tomorrow, Jihoon. Remember? We need a jacket shoot for the collab. It was on the schedule."

Oh, fuck. He had completely blanked on that. You guys were almost done recording the finishing touches to the song, but he forgot you guys also needed to do the shoot for the promo and learn the choreo as soon as you gave the choreographers the finalized version for the single. There was still so much to be done, which only meant even more time spent with you.

"Yeah, right. Sorry, hah, completely spaced out on that. I'll see you tomo-"

"Come pick me up?"

"Huh?"

"I mean, stop by my practice room so we can walk together? Is that okay?"

Did you- did you want to spend even more time with him? He wasn't complaining. He wanted all his time to be consumed by you, but .. was the feeling mutual?

"Yes," he paused, realizing his answer had been too short and mechanical, "I mean, yeah, sure, I don't mind. I'll see you here tomorrow morning."

You giggled at him before bidding your goodbye once more, but this time offering him a quick side hug before disappearing through the door to your practice room. Jihoon was glad you were gone, because this time it wasn't just his ears that were red, but his whole face had begun to resemble a tomato.

It was time to admit to himself that he was down bad tremendously for you.

Jihoon had not at any moment stopped to wonder what type of vibe the collaboration was meant to follow. Yeah, he was working on the song (which was almost finalized by now), so he knew it was pretty much a pop-rock-ish vibe that they were going for, but he didn't know what the rest of the equation would look like, which was something he wished he'd prepared a bit better for.

He had walked you over this morning, even being enticed by Seungkwan into bringing you your favorite drink as a nice gesture (which worked perfectly, as it won him over yet another side hug). The two of you arrived to the designated area for photoshoots located in one of the lower floors of the Hybe building, then went your separate ways to head over to hair and makeup in order to get your outfits situated. He had to admit he liked his outfit. It was a little more provocative than usual, with it being mostly black leather and the top being unbuttoned enough to show off most of his abdomen. It was your outfit, however, that had him reeling.

Nothing could have prepared him for the moment he stepped out and spotted you doing a few solo shots in preparation, your outfit and makeup already perfectly in place. He had no words to express how he felt upon seeing you. You looked so ... gorgeous. Unsure of how to react at the sight in front of him, he stood there staring, almost as if he'd seen an apparition. It wasn't until one of the photographers called him over that he managed to regain sense of self and join you.

The entirety of the photoshoot was absolute hell for Jihoon. This was the closest he'd ever been to you (sans the now two quick side hugs you'd given him in the past day). The shoot was a bit .. sensual in nature. The first set of outfits were edgier, so the shoot was the basic scenario you'd picture for a punk-rock pictorial. The second set of outfits had been the issue, because they went in the complete opposite direction. You were in a beaten down motel room setting, wearing very simple outfits, although they were both very skimpy and thin, almost as if to signify the simplicity of the concept. You two posed together on the bed, with your poses getting more and more intimate by the minute. At some point he had been directed to embrace you as he looked into your lips, with the proximity being way too close for comfort (or at least that's what he tried to tell himself). At another point he was kneeling on the bed as he looked up at you, your eyes simulating lust as you looked down on him, hand on his chin, lifting his gaze to yours.

The shoot had been an experience, to say the least. Jihoon wasn't sure how he survived it without breaking. He thanked the gods for the years of preparation with all types of shoots he'd done with the members over the years. However, completion of the shoot did not mean he was unaffected. He had no idea how he'd get the image of your lips so close to his out of his mind. Despite knowing it'd all been professional and strictly fake, he could've sworn he felt something every time your eyes would meet when at such a close distance. He wanted it to be real so badly, but once again he chalked it up to being wishful thinking. At least the worst of it was over, and he could now get back to sitting next to you in his studio at a respectable distance.

~

Jihoon had been an idiot to ever believe that the shoot had been the worst of it.

It had now been a week since the dreaded photoshoot (The one that had him up at night imagining what it would've been like if he had just closed the gap between your lips, damning anyone else in the room), and now it had been a few days since the song had finally been completed. He had thoroughly enjoyed co-producing with you, geeking at your ability to compliment each other perfectly. Your voice was yet another thing he had fallen in love with during the process, fully enamored by every single take you did. It had actually slowed down the process, as Jihoon green-lit every single one of your takes due to the rose-colored glasses that prevented him from catching mistakes you swore you'd committed during a few of the takes. You seemed to be similar, however, as you continued to shower him in compliments (even at the shoot, where you had complimented him with his hard work at the gym - a moment he chose to disregard or else he would've lost his mind at the implications), refusing to admit any faults of his while recording.

Now, however, he found himself in very difficult and unchartered waters. Any other time in which he'd produced a song, he'd never been involved further than that. He'd done duo shoots before, with women at that, but what he'd never done was share a choreography with someone who wasn't a member of Seventeen. He had danced with women before, of course, even having participated in more sensual dances, but this felt different. All previous times had been with nameless backup dancers he had never known too well. This was you. He now had to work through an entire choreo with you as the two of you danced around each other (physically and figuratively, he believed).

Most of the song involved a very casual choreo, as the two of you danced mostly separately but complimented one another. The kicker was the bridge of the song, where the melody mellowed out a bit and allowed for a quick dance break of sorts. It was very sensual in nature, and required you and Jihoon to tangle against each other as you used the other's body to complete the dance. Going over it had been full of shy smiles and eyes that couldn't seem to meet. It almost made him believe that you'd felt just as flustered as he did. When you actually began to dance over that part, however, you left Jihoon's mouth watering at how easy it was for you to meld your body to his; how you would guide his shy hands to place them in all the correct places. The feeling of your body against his was new and unfamiliar, but it felt so right to him. He wanted nothing more than to leave his mark on your skin, signaling that he was the only one meant to touch there. He was truly going mad.

It had now been about two months since Jihoon had first met you. The song hadn't been released yet, but most preparations for it had been done. All that was left was a quick music video shoot plus a few music show appearances that would come after the actual release of the song. Thus far, the song had been announced, with a pending release date of a month from now. Jihoon had enjoyed public reaction to the unexpected collab, with people even going as far as calling you a dynamic duo due to your respective reputations as the main producers of your groups.

You seemed to also enjoy knowing the news had finally broken to the public, even going as far as mentioning Jihoon in some of your lives. He specifically recalled a moment he'd seen as he watched it live, one that had him blushing and kicking his feet. You'd been asked about what it was like working with Jihoon, to which you responded with a whole paragraph of compliments directed at his work ethic, along with a short quip about how cute you found Jihoon to be, deeming it 'difficult to focus with him around.' He felt like he was on cloud nine at the comment, despite how lightheartedly you had delivered it.

After that (and a few more instances of you shooting compliments his way), he had decided he wanted to see you outside of a work-related schedule. He had begun making excuses to find himself on your group's floor, going as far as using Seungkwan and Soonyoung (who you'd unfortunately befriended due to his constant unwanted presence as you two worked on your song) as pawns in order to not be as obvious whenever he went to see you. Despite your usually outgoing demeanor, you seemed a bit more reserved whenever it was only you and Jihoon. He wondered if it was because of his quiet demeanor, or because you might've maybe returned his feelings and felt too shy to be too expressive around your crush - he knew damn well that was his case, at least.

Today the two of you were working out together at the gym - a huge feat for Jihoon, who could not help but ogle at you whenever you weren't paying attention - with him playing the role of your spotter. He had extensive knowledge of weightlifting, which he had been proud to impress you with. Right now, you were working on your arms, which required Jihoon at a close proximity in order to make sure you didn't get hurt. He enjoyed this way more than he could admit to anyone or himself.

"Is this okay? Is this the right position to do it?", you questioned as you made eye contact with him through the mirror. Your arms were lifted above your shoulders, with dumbbells on each of them as you attempted to lift them both at once.

"Yeah. That's perfect. Is it too heavy? Do you need to stop?"

"No, I'm fine, Ji, I promise. Just stand a little closer, yeah? I don't wanna drop them. And put your arms under mine?", he followed your instructions, now towering over you from behind as you sat in front of him.

The two of you had grown more comfortable in the past two weeks or so, seeing each other almost every day while outside of official schedules. He'd learned that, unlike him, you didn't have any issues with personal space, often allowing him to stand too close for comfort. He couldn't complain, though, as he was always too hypnotized by the proximity.

"Shit!", you yelped, almost dropping the dumbbell before Jihoon managed to intercept it. You had begun to do a set before the one minute mark passed, deeming you too weak to lift the dumbbell all the way up. Luckily, you had instructed Jihoon to stand close to you in order to prevent any actual damage.

"Are you okay?", he asked as he placed the dumbbells on the ground, rounding the seat in order to stand in front of your sitting form.

It was mind-numbing, really. The angle in which he was looking down at you, with your pretty eyes looking back at him with a semi-worried expression on your face at the shock of almost dropping such a heavy weight on yourself. The incident left his mind immediately at the sight of you, a layer of sweat covering your skin as you panted while looking up at him. He pulled you up by your arms, helping you stand in front of him. In very cliche fashion, you tripped a bit, almost landing on him before he caught you by your forearms. The classic 'falling-atop-your-crush' trope did not happen, but he still ended up at even a closer proximity to you. Just when he had finally begun to forget the sight of your lips right in front of his from back when you did the jacket shoot together.

He did not move back, and neither did you, allowing the small distance between you to fog both of your minds.

"T-thanks, Hoonie. Could've really hurt myself," this was the first time he'd ever heard a stutter out of you, with your eyes not looking into his as they usually did. Your closeness still not diminishing even when the danger of the situation had already dissipated.

"'Course. Uh, I .. Maybe we should go back to a lighter weight?"

It took you a moment to respond, eventually choosing to look back at him with your pretty eyes, a seemingly empty head to match. He liked the look on you. He could've sworn he saw your eyes lower to his lips, but his mind was too clouded to confirm.

"Uh, actually, I think im done for the day. Is that okay? I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?"

"Oh, right. Yeah. I'll meet you in front of your practice room?", he was confused at your sudden departure, dreading the separation, but he figured one of you would have to break the spell eventually.

"Yeah. See you there, Hoonie. I'll text you later, okay?", you gave him a quick peck on his cheek before turning to the exit, leaving behind a beet-red Jihoon as he tried to get his heartbeat to slow to a healthy rhythm.

He was left standing there, in the cold and empty company gym as he pondered as to whether or not his feelings may be mutual.

~

The next day the two of you met again, no mention of yesterday at all. What would there be to mention anyways? That you two stood close to each other? Jihoon felt like such a loser even having considered it anything. He was just inexperienced at this, and very much touch starved, so any small suggestive interaction had him overthinking. Like right now, as you hooked your arm on his to walk along the Hybe building together, not a care in the world about anyone who would see you.

"Did you see the outline for the music video?", you spoke up once the two of you had reached the cafeteria, picking a secluded table to sit at - not that many people wandered there anyway.

"Hmm. No, what is it?", he still hadn't managed to beat the habit of not checking his emails.

You giggled, seeming a little flustered, "Uh, we're playing a couple. Very Bonnie and Clyde but with a grudge twist. Seems pretty cool, actually."

"Oh. We-we're playing a couple?"

"Yeah. I think we can pull it off. You did really good at the shoot. Did you see the finished product? Okay, never mind. I know you didn't. They look really good, though. We look very convincing."

He knew you didn't mean anything by it, but you constantly had him wondering. If you liked him you wouldn't be this direct, right? This must've all been very lighthearted to you. Sure, you were friends, but that's where it all ended for you. Jihoon was the complete opposite. Every single interaction you had had him falling deeper and deeper into a hole of infatuation for you. There was nothing about you he wasn't obsessed with. It had begun to manifest in all areas of his life, even his work. He had never had more unfinished love songs in his hard drive.

Unbeknownst to you, he had purposely avoided taking a look at those pictures, knowing his mind would go blank at the image of you looking at him with those lustful eyes from a third-person perspective. Living through it already had him in agony night after night as he thought of nothing but you.

"Y-yeah. I saw them," he lied, "You did amazing."

"Really?", you were always giddy at his compliments (which didn't come often due to his shy demeanor towards you), "I've never done a more provocative concept like this before. It's fun. It suits you a lot, Jihoon. I'm glad I got to do it with you of all people."

And you had no idea how glad he was too.

Shooting the music video had somehow been even more agonizing than the photoshoot. It was two grueling days of constant time spent together. He loved your company, but the stylists kept insisting on dressing you in the most provocative outfits imaginable to man. He couldn't think while he looked at you. You were like a siren. Even the strongest of men wouldn't be able to resist you.

The worst of it came in the form of the director instructing you two to act like two lovers against the world. Word for word. It wasn't difficult for Jihoon to pretend he was enamored by you, but he was truly at a loss of words over how well you also played your role. By now he had become numb to your touch, having run through the choreography with you multiple times by now, and with you having become increasingly touchier through the time you'd known each other.

He thanked god under his breath as soon as the two days came to a close, knowing that now he could at least keep his feelings under wraps for a while. It was now about two weeks until the release of the song. According to the schedule, all that was left was one pre-recorded Studio Choom performance, two comeback shows after the release of the song, and two variety show appearances together. It was all pretty straightforward from now on. There was no way Jihoon wouldn't be able to put up with what was left. He had this in the bag.

The worst thing imaginable happened after that. Jihoon had not planned for this, nor had you, apparently.

It was very sudden and came completely out of left field. It pertained to you, but had affected Jihoon more than anyone involved.

Dispatch had released an article just a week before the official release of the song. Promotions had only begun, but had been slightly disrupted by this sudden interruption.

The article featured you, and an unknown man. They were clearly pictures taken off-guard, from a distance. You were in front of some building, ignorant to any cameras nearby. You were too close for Jihoon's comfort. He knew there was some type of relationship there. The caption to the picture didn't help matters either. Something about an estranged lover you'd been keeping secret from the media. There were too many pictures for Jihoon to process. In some you were embracing, while in others you were sharing a low-quality peck from what he could tell.

Seeing that article had been an absolute punch in the gut. There was no argument against it. There was clearly something between you and that guy. He was standing too close to you, even holding onto you in most of the pictures. You could barely tell it was you, but to Jihoon it was obvious. He had never felt heartbreak like this before. The two of you had never dated or even insinuated actual interest in the other, but it still felt like betrayal to him, as irrational as that thought was. It was all his fault, really. Had he told you about his feelings, maybe things would've been different.

Jihoon felt like an idiot. Of course this had all been just a business transaction to you. You were assigned to work with him, just as he was you. Even if he had led himself to believe that the feelings might've somehow been mutual, it had all just been in his head. What would you see in him anyways? Yeah, sure, you had a few things in common, but who in their right mind would ever want to be with the empty-hearted producer who cared for nothing but work. Hell, the day he met you was yet another day in which he had been willingly locked in his studio all day. That was what you would've been signing up for, had you looked his way. He didn't wish such a loveless relationship to anyone. He knew by now that he did- he did love you, but he knew he was probably unable to love you in the way you deserved. He was incapable of that. At 26, he'd had no experience with love. Why would someone as beautiful and amazing as you want to be with someone like him?

He was in love with you. That was something he could now full-heartedly admit to himself. Within these two months he had fallen deeply in love with you. Nothing could change that by now, not even knowing that you were already taken. He couldn't help himself in locking himself in his house after that, ignoring and all messages from both you and his manager regarding the few rehearsals he had skipped over.

Hybe did their damage control, making the situation go away as soon as it arose, but to Jihoon the damage had been done. He felt like an irrational idiot being hurt by this, but he needed to be away from you for a few days. You hadn't done anything to him, but he couldn't see you right now without feeling pain. He was punishing you with no proper justification, but his feelings were too strong for him to put up with.

A little over an entire day went on like this, with no communication from Jihoon to anyone. He was surprised no one had come looking for him until now, the moment in which bangs against his front door could be heard all the way from his room. Whoever was looking for him had made liberal use of the doorbell too, not giving him a single break from its constant ringing as he tried to ignore it. He finally grew too tired of it, deciding to give up his moping and going downstairs to beg that person to leave him alone to his misery. He still needed a few days before he could go face his reality. He couldn't face you just yet.

Except the choice had been made for him. His first mistake had been not checking the doorbell camera, which would've made him privy on who exactly was knocking on his door. He felt bad at thinking this, but had he known it was you, he never would've opened it.

He was beyond embarrassed at his appearance, once more wearing a three-day-old shirt and his cheeks damp with the tears he hadn't yet wiped away. You, on the other hand, looked as beautiful as ever. You carried a worried look on your face, lips pouty and eyebrows furrowed as you looked at him. He was not given time to welcome you in before you barged in for yourself, launching yourself at him in a tight hug before he could say anything. He wasn't an idiot, and he was too weak for his liking, so he held you back just as tight, enjoying a good three or so minutes of silence as you held each other.

You pulled away too soon for his liking, unhooking your face from the crook of his neck as you spoke up, still holding onto him, "Jihoon ... I'm so sorry. It's- it's not what you think, I swear. Please believe me."

He wasn't sure why you were so apologetic. You didn't owe him anything. He felt like even more of a loser at making you feel like you had to apologize for having a boyfriend. He knew that by now there was no way you didn't know about his crush on you, which made him feel even more humiliated at the situation. He separated himself from you for the first time ever, creating some distance as he refused to look at you. He took this chance to close the door he had left open when you had attacked him with your embrace.

"You don't have to ..."

"No, Jihoon. Listen to me. Please."

Your eyes were glossy now, and Jihoon felt bad at causing you any distress, so he signaled at you to continue.

"It's not- it isn't what you think. Yeah, I ... I did have a ... a thing with that guy. I know Hybe denied it being me, but you know- you know it's me. But it's not how it looks!"

"Then ... what is it?", he couldn't believe he was even letting himself ask that question, as if you had to explain yourself to him. But part of him really wanted to know. He wanted to somehow hear you say that it wasn't true, that you would never look at anyone but him.

"It's an old picture. He- he used to work for our group, as staff. We had a thing. It ended badly. Haven't really dated since then. This was before I met you, Jihoon, please, I need you to know that."

"You .. Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you need me to know that?", he hoped against all hope that you'd answer with what he'd been wanting to hear since he met you, but he knew he was playing with the devil when asking you that. He knew there was a very logical chance that you'd just confirm your platonic feelings for him, or straight up reject him.

"You know, Jihoon. I know you know. I- I'd never do that to you. I'd never look at anyone but you."

"Do you-"

"Yes', you paused, 'I like you, Jihoon."

And then his heart stopped beating.

"So much. Since we met. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since the day we met. I like you so fucking much. I can't think of anything else. I thought it was just because I've always been a fan of yours, but ... being around you just made me feel so happy. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. Fuck, I'm sorry I made you feel like there was someone else in the picture."

He didn't know what to say. You'd said everything he had wanted to hear for the past two months. You liked him. It wasn't one-sided. There was nothing stopping him from making you his now. Those feelings he thought had been fake for the portrayal of your song's concept had been genuine all along. He'd never felt such relief.

"Jihoon? Is it not ...? Fuck. Did I misread everything? Shit, I'm sorry. I should, uh, I should go-"

Fuck. No! He needed to reciprocate, he just had no idea how. He couldn't have you thinking he wasn't equally (if not more) obsessed with you. So he did the one thing he could think of in that moment. Something he had imagined time and time again, but never had the courage to do.

You yelped against him as he pulled his lips to yours, but immediately began kissing him back. There was nothing tender about the kiss as Jihoon would've expected. It was a complete mess from the start. The kiss was a testament to how badly you'd both wanted each other this whole time.

Jihoon felt lightheaded at the feeling of your tongue sneaking its way into his mouth, and the moans that accompanied it. He couldn't help but feel immediate arousal at your touch. He wasn't sure how to kiss you. He'd never shared such a passionate exchange before, but he wanted to give you everything in him with his kiss.

You only pulled away when you were out of breath, still keeping yourself as close to him as possible as you breathed into each other's mouths, your lips lightly closing over his as you regained your breath.

"Hoonie ..." the sound of your breathless voice muttering his name did shameful things to him. There was no way he could handle a conversation right now.

"Tell me- tell me you like me. I need to know. Please ..." the sheer lust and desperation in your voice were things that would never leave Jihoon's mind.

"So much. I li- I love you. You have no idea. Every day was agony not acting on it. I'm sorry if it's too much, but it's true. I've never felt this way before. I'm in love with you. The thought of you with someone else made me wanna give everything up. It's ... God, I just love you."

You didn't seem to need any more words before closing the gap again, this time backing him up against the nearest wall as you kissed him with all your might. You took full control of the kiss, grabbing his cheeks and angling him so you could play with his lips as you saw fit. He moaned and writhed against you, shyly attempting to hold onto your waist but not actually daring to. You must've caught wind of his intentions, grabbing onto his hands and forcing them on your waist, pressing your chest up against his. He began to caress your waist, falling in love with the slope of your back in the process. He was still shy with his movements, but his lips were nothing but. He adored your soft sighs against his lips any time his tongue would suckle on yours, or any time his teeth nibbled on your bottom lip.

You must've eventually grown tired of his shy demeanor, grabbing onto his arms and pining them above his head, beginning to softly grind against him as you began to lick and suck at his neck. Jihoon was on cloud nine. His body was unsure of how to react to such pleasure from someone he had already grown so addicted to.

"Hoonie ... want you so bad ... please," his knees buckled at your begging, your warm breath hitting against his ear as he groaned out at the thought of you in his bed.

He was simply a shell of himself at that point, so it had been your responsibility to drag the both of you in the direction he pointed his bedroom was at, but as soon as you were there, you pushed him to lay on the bed. He was ready for whatever you were willing to give him. He had no chance against you anyway.

"Hoonie, shit. Been wanting you for so long. Can I, please?", you'd begun to straddle him, leaning over him as you ghosted over his lips. He swore he wasn't going to make it, body heating up at the mere suggestion of you touching him.

"P-please ..."

You began kissing him again, running your hands up and down his torso, eventually landing on his crotch, softly caressing it as he whined into your mouth.

"Oh? Jihoonie ... You're so hard. Want me to help you?"

"Fuck ... Need you so bad, please ..."

"But we haven't even started to have fun," you moved your hand away, now sitting up a bit to begin grinding against his crotch, deep movements making his eyes roll back as his arms laid limp on his sides.

"Won't you touch me, Hoonie? Don't be shy. You already know how much I want you," you guided his hands to your hips, making him clamp his fingers on the clothed flesh while you moaned out at the feeling of his hard cock gracing your most delicate parts.

You were both beginning to heat up, which led you to throw your shirt off, now only in a bra and some sweats. He audibly moaned at the view, only causing you to play it up for him as you caressed your own covered breasts, "Want me to take my bra off, baby? Hmm?"

"Y-yes. Wanna see you so bad. You're so beautiful."

That was enough for you to wiggle your way out of your pants, throwing off your bra right after. The sight had his cock squirming under you. No amount of lonely nights thinking about you could have ever prepared him for the sight before him. Your soft skin shining under the soft light of the half drawn blinds. He wanted to memorize your body, leave his mark on every inch of it, but his arms would not move from your hips. He knew that the moment he got his hands on you he would finally face insanity. There was not a single detail he wasn't already obsessed with. He wanted you so badly, but he didn't know what to do with himself. His cock was extremely swollen under his sweats, begging to find comfort in any crevice of your body you would allow. The fleeting thought of fucking your pretty tits flew through his mind, making him shudder as he continued to pant at the beautiful girl sitting on him.

"Touch me?", you asked, already guiding his hands to your breasts, making him sit up to be face to face with you.

"Holy fuck ..." he moaned at the warmth of your breasts in his hands. He couldn't help himself in getting his fill of you, hands squeezing and running all over your chest. The moment he dared to pinch at your nipples he truly saw heaven, hearing you whine his name in the prettiest sound he'd ever heard.

"Hoo-Hoonie ... Please. Touch me more. Just like that," you let your head fall back, sighing at the soft touch of his fingers pinching at your nipples, "Your mouth, Hoonie ..."

That was all he needed to lower his head and begin licking at your nipples, biting lightly as he pulled at them, dick twitching desperately at the pretty sounds leaving your lips. He could've sworn he'd cum just from how beautiful you sounded. His ears were ringing by now, only able to process the feeling of your hand pressing his face against your chest and your hips suddenly restarting their movements against his own.

You let him make out with your tits for a bit before pulling him off, much to his dismay. You giggled at his reaction, but began to pout at him to get him to remove his top.

"Shit. God, Hoonie, you're so gorgeous," you breathed out upon seeing his bare chest, running your hands up and down the blank canvas. You let your own fingers pull and pinch at his nipples a bit, slow in your movements as he whined at you. He understood now, how fucking good such a light touch in such a sensitive area felt. He was beginning to lose all air in his brain, mind foggy as you gave him all types of pleasure.

He needed you now. Needed attention in his nether area so bad. He could feel how wet you were through his sweats, softly begging you to please let him have you. The whisper against your ear had you pulling your hands away from his chest, separating yourself enough to look into his eyes.

"Want you too. Can I have it, Hoonie? Fuck ... Will you judge me if I beg? I just ... Want you in my mouth so bad, Hoonie, please."

He felt embarrassed by his reaction, but he couldn't help but moan loudly at that simple sentence, nodding like crazy at the proposition. The last time he'd been in someone's mouth had been years ago. He had felt intimate touch before, but only a handful of times total. He was fully unprepared for what your mouth encompassing him would feel like.

Before he knew it, you had thrown off both his pants and boxers, enticing him to sit at the edge of the bed as you knelt in front of him. You were looking at his cock as if it were your last meal, eyes crossed and a moan leaving your mouth at the sight. He couldn't believe a gorgeous thing like yourself would ever show so much thirst for him. His soul left his body the moment you lowered your tongue onto his tip, kitten-licking at it as you looked up into his eyes. What truly made him lose his mind, however, was the moment you began to bob your head up and down his cock, with your hands playing and scratching at his balls. His hands clutched at the sheets, unable to hold himself in a sat up position due to the unimaginable pleasure. He was unsure how he didn't cum the moment you put your mouth on him (or the moment you kissed him, if he was being honest).

"So- fuck ... So fucking good. You're perfect. Please ..." he wasn't sure what he was begging for. The pleasure was clouding his mind. And then you did something that had him gasping for air. You unglued your mouth from gagging on his cock in favor of licking and sucking at his balls. His eyes rolled all the way back into his brain, back arching against the bed as you took turns licking his balls and worshiping his cock.

Unsurprisingly, he came in your mouth moments later, almost blacking out at the feeling. He was unable to catch his breath for a good minute, all the while you swallowed his seed and sat back on him. Before he was able to resume his breathing, you had already shoved your tongue back in his mouth, making him whine at the mixture of your saliva and his cum twirling in your tongue. He couldn't help his hands running all over your body, hugging and squeezing at every curve he could reach.

"Baby, I-"

"Taste so good, Hoonie, fuck. You have no idea how much I thought about that. Every time you wore those tiny little shorts to dance practice all I wanted to do was kick everyone out and beg you to fuck my mouth."

Jesus Christ. He hated how outspoken you were sometimes. He felt himself begin to harden again at just the simple thought of you wanting him as much as he did you (even though he was 99% sure that was impossible). He felt bad, but he was a bit sad he had cum in your mouth. He had thought of the feeling of your cunt wrapping around him almost every night for the past month. He knew he'd get it sooner or later, but a sinister part of his brain was begging him to flip you around and go to town on you. He might've been inexperienced, but he knew that his body would take him there if he needed it.

"W-wanna ..."

"Hmm? Yeah, baby?", you softly caressed his cheek, looking at him with so much love in your eyes.

"Please ..." he couldn't bring himself to say it. He felt too ashamed at asking for even more out of you when he'd already made you do all the work to confess and even made him have the best orgasm of his life.

"Yeah, Hoonie? Want me? Want you too. You have no idea ..." he thanked god the moment you started grinding against his bare dick yet again, leaning down to lick at his lips, "Can I ride you, baby? Please ... Been dreaming about it."

All he could do was whine and nod as his hands squeezed at your ass, trying to entice you into lifting your hips so you could finally sit on his now hardened dick.

No words left his mouth as you finally lowered on him, all his focus on the pretty expression on your face as you moaned out at the feeling of being impaled by him. His back arched, head digging back into the mattress at the feeling of your cunt tightening around him. He felt your back arch too as you leaned down to kiss him, mouths open as you whined and mewled at each other.

You began humping him with no proper rhythm, causing him to thrust upwards to meet your own grinds. He was so desperate for you. Nothing compared to how good he felt in that moment. Your body was drawing all types of pleasure out of him.

"F-feel so good. Hoonie ... You're so- Ah! So fucking good for me."

"Me? You ... Shit. Never felt this good. You're perfect," you tightened at his words, making him plant his feet on the bed and begin to frantically fuck upwards, leading you to scream and whine his name for all his neighbors to hear.

"Love you so much- Fuck! Been wanting you forever. Didn't know how hard I'd fall for you that day, shit. You're everything to me," he couldn't help himself in rambling yet another confession in your ear as you attempted to match the animalistic pace of his thrusts.

"Love you too, Hoonie. You have n-no idea. Never letting you go. You- you're mine now," and yours he wanted to be forever.

Jihoon had never imagined he'd feel love like this as long as he was alive. He had lost hope in finding the perfect girl many years ago, assuming his lifestyle to be too difficult for him to find someone to love him so strongly, but now he had you. Now he had you in his arms as you professed your love for one another. He had never felt such happiness. His ability to think left him soon after, however, as you clamped down on him with yet another scream of his name as you found your end, taking him with you in his own.

After the two minutes or so that it took you to regain your breaths, you managed to cuddle up against each other, unable to stop caressing each other in one way or another. The smiles wouldn't leave your faces. Jihoon couldn't help but think of his life; how he had everything a man could ever want, and now he had you on top of all that, and you'd quickly become his favorite thing. You spent the rest of the day in his bed, making love and waxing poetic at one another. You completely disregarded any collab preparations for the day, opting instead to finally give into each other to the fullest extent.

Soon after, all promotions finally ended. You and Jihoon received equal accolades on your ability to mix both your styles, achieving a successful collaboration between two monster producers. The praise over being all rounders was also endless, as people commended you both for the production, vocals, dance, visuals and chemistry demonstrated all throughout the promotional period.

People noticed how comfortable you were around each other, despite having never publicly interacted before the release date of the single. People believed it was simply amazing work ethic being showcased by the two of you, but what didn't meet the public eye was the genuine love and enjoyment behind every interaction. The two of you had made it a point to begin appearing publicly together often from then on (strictly as friends to anyone who asked, of course), which allowed you to hide your relationship in plain sight.

Jihoon had never been happier, now having you as yet another companion to visit him at his Universe Factory any time he would lock himself in there to work, a habit that began to diminish as he grew more and more addicted to your company outside the confinement of those four walls.

Today was yet another one of those occasions, as you were sharing yet another meal together at the Hybe cafeteria. Staff was mostly unaware of the nature of your relationship, but you two liked it that way.

"Hey," you called out to him as you played around with his phone.

"Hmm?"

"Did you see this email from Bumzu?", he shook his head in denial, "He said Hybe's requesting your help producing for Gyu's collab with Jungkook. Cause of how well ours did."

"Yeah?", he chuckled, "Gonna have to talk to him. Not doing it without you."

"Oh, really?", you grinned at him, "Wanna team up again?", you leaned closer to him, but not too close to draw suspicion from the few other idols and staff around who were eating there.

"Mhm. You did most of the work. Couldn't've done it without you."

He knew that to be completely true, as he would've remained in his slump had you not come out of left field to make his life do a 180.

"Wanna team up with you for the rest of my life."

You smiled at him. He could see in your eyes you wanted to show some sort of affection towards him, but could not due to the public setting. All it took was one look between you for him to know you felt the same. You held his hand under the table, going back to conversation about your next possible collaboration together with your other labelmates, happy to have found a soulmate in one another.

a/n: idk how other writers are putting out 20k+ words monsters jesus christ. anyways i rlly hope u enjoyed <33 this concept had been plaguing my mind for a while so im rlly happy to have finally finished it!!

#seventeen fanfic #seventeen x reader #svt fanfic #seventeen #svt #svt x reader #seventeen imagine #seventeen oneshot #seventeen smut #svt smut #seventeen scenarios #svt scenarios #seventeen angst #svt angst #jihoon angst #jihoon fanfic #jihoon x reader #jihoon smut #woozi scenarios #woozi fanfic #woozi x reader #woozi smut #woozi imagines

[1onelypoet]

sweet tooth (for you) || lando norris smau

a/n: we're backkkkkk!!! making this took way more time than I expected but hopefully it's better quality?? also I have an actual plan for how the story will unfold so (ik, shocking) 😍

pairing: lando norris x singer! ex-leclerc! reader

fc: reneé rapp

warnings: cursing

disclaimer: this is completely fictional. no hate meant towards anyone mentioned.

part two, part three, part four

popculture August 7

liked by f1gossip, user1, user2 and others

tagged yourusername, charles_leclerc

popculture Singer Y/n L/n's boyfriend of 3 years, Charles Leclerc, has been spotted with another woman.

The Ferrari driver was seen spending his summer break in Corsica on a boat with the unamed woman yesterday. He was pictured talking to her and kissing her, leading us to wonder: where is Y/n? The singer was last spotted in Monaco, where she and Charles share an apartment.

Neither party has said anything about the situation as of now.

view all comments

user3 WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK THOS ODNT REAL I CANNOT DO THIS JOW COULD HE MP

user3 CHALRES LECELREC WHEN I SEE UOU

user4 poor y/n :(

user5 ikr, hope she's doing okay :( ↳ user4 also if we assume that she found out via ig :(

user6 if THE y/n l/n gets cheated on there's no hope for us

user7 love isn't real.

user8 the new album is going to slap

yourusername added to their story August 7

seen by carlossainz55, yukitsunoda0511, gracieabrams and others

replies have been disabled

yourusername August 9

liked by charlottesiine, lilymhe, sabrinacarpenter and others

yourusername maybe i should try religion cus jesus ur hard 2 rely on

view all comments

yourbff my love <3

yourusername <3

carmenmmundt sending love 🫶🏼

user9 HE DOESNT DESERVE U BAE

addisonraee main character.

user10 NEW MUSIC HELLO???

user11 ITS GONNA BE FUCKING FIRE OMG ↳ user10 THE WAY ITS BEEN 2 DAYS AND SHES ALREADY IN THE STUDIO IS SO ICONIC MOTHER IS MOTHERING

lilymhe love u babe ❤️

yourusername love u too lils❤️

user12 are those song lyrics i see in the caption 🤨

f1gossip August 9

liked by manonsworld, user14, user15 and others

tagged charles_leclerc

f1gossip More unseen photos of Charles and his unamed beau

view all comments

user16 this is actually really sad

user17 Charles, I just want to have a chat! 🤗

user17 🔪🔪

user18 bro imagine being y/n and just seeing ur bf publicly cheat on u

user19 someone HAS to know who she is, like 🤨

user20 i bet the twitter stans are already on it

yourbff added to their story August 11

seen by yourusername, anasainzvdec, landonorris and others

f1gossipgirl August 12

liked by f1gossip, user21, user22 and others

tagged charles_leclerc, manonsworld

f1gossipgirl Paparazzi photos taken of Charles Leclerc and Manon Bernardi enjoying their holiday

view all comments

user23 oh thats not...

user24 I mean she's really pretty but um

user25 Cute couple!

user26 bffr ↳ user27 HELP

user28 how r u guys getting these pics what???

yourusername August 15

liked by luisinhaoliveira99, landonorris, spotify and others

tagged charlottesiine, isahernaez, itselenaberri, katerinaberezhna, luisinhaoliveira99

yourusername girls night out 🥂

view all comments

luisinhaoliveira99 ❤️❤️❤️

charlottesiine had so much fun 💓

user29 the ex wags supporting eachother is so precious 🥹

user30 they're such cuties 🥹🥹

itselenaberri 👯🏼‍♀️👯🏼‍♀️

user31 THIS IS ICONIC OMG

isahernaez my fav girls 🫶🏼

katerinaberezhna ❤️‍🔥💋

yourusername August 19

liked by landonorris, lizzymcalpine, yourbff and others

tagged yukitsunoda0511, yourbff

yourusername surprise coming soon yay

view all comments

yukitsunoda0511 who dat boi 😎​

yourusername pls never say that again u sound like a frat boy ↳ yukitsunoda0511 maybe i am a frat boy ↳ yourusername ...no ❤️

yourbff loveeee the crying pics!

yourusername ty pookie

user32 THE HIS LOSS CAKE QUEEN BEHAVIOR

user33 AND THE SHIRT?? IM DECEASED

user34 it's an album announcement it's an album announcement it's an album announcement it's an album announcement it's an album announcement it's an album announcement it's an album announcement it's

yourusername added to their story August 21

seen by yourbff, landonorris, f1gossip and others

yourusername August 22

liked by gracieabrams, conangray, lilymhe and others

yourusername i was originally planning on making an ep, most likely called talk too much, with somewhat final drafts of pretty girls, 23, i wish, willow, talk too much, and gemini moon for the tracklist. but, as some of you guys know, my life took a drastic turn in august. in the past month i have tried to distract myself as much as possible, constantly on the move, whether it was actually moving out of my apartment or hanging out with my friends. but when i worked on my music i let myself really feel. feel the pain and the betrayal. and so, after way too many late night runs to mcdonalds, mental breakdowns, calls with my therapist, and movie marathons, i had six more songs.

and so snow angel was born.

even though i know this isn't going to get rid of the pain, which will probably linger in the depths of my insecurities for years to come, snow angel is the step i needed to take to reach acceptance.

thank you to everyone who made this album possible: my fans, friends, producers, family -- i truly could not have done this without you.

i love you all.

view all comments

lilymhe MOTHER IS MOTHERING

landonorris Great album!

yourusername tysm lando 🤗

user35 UM??

oliviarodrigo not okay rn

yukitsunoda0511 slayyyy 🔥💅🌈

user36 yuki, babe, what is this... ↳ yourusername we'd all like to know 😔

yourbff I LOVE YOU POOKIE BEAR 😻😻

yourusername I LOVE YOU TOO CUDDLEMUFFIN 😘

carla.brocker Talented, Brilliant, Incredible, Amazing, Showstopping, Spectacular, Never The Same, Totally Unique, Completely Not Ever Been Done Before, Unafraid To Reference Or Not Reference

leclerc_pascale ❤️❤️❤️

yourusername 💗💗

danielricciardo pop offff (did I use that right?)

yourusername thanks! (yes but it sounded cringe) ↳ landonorris hm (y/n's being nice, it was atrocious)

spotify on repeat.

rachelzegler omg

#f1 #f1 smau #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 social media au #smau #lando norris #lando x reader #lando norris social media au #lando norris smau #ln4 x reader

[beomiracles]

Can i ask for a txt reacting to reader having one of their lyrics tattooed? :)

WHEN YOU HAVE THEIR LYRICS TATTOOED

pairings: txt x gn!neutral reader (EXCEPT Beomgyu's, reader is implied to wear a skirt, take it however you want ofc!) warnings: marking in yeonjun's + kissing/making out, beomgyu's is suggestive/makeout, taehyun's is also suggestive.

A/N ─ really did not intend for it to get as smutty as it did but here we are :3

YEONJUN 

will literally think it’s the sexiest thing ever. 

wants you to always show it off. 

kisses it a lot. 

most likely has something that reminds him of you tattooed in as well. 

Heavy breaths fill the room as Yeonjun presses hot open mouthed kisses to your jaw and neck. Your hands rake through his hair, tugging at the ends slightly, pulling a groan from your boyfriend. His hands find their way under your shirt as he draws circles on the skin above your hips. 

His head makes its way down your chest as he hikes your shirt up only to freeze in his tracks. Thumb dragging along the cursive text on your right rib, “holy fuck, babe..” he murmurs as he stares at the tattoo. Propping yourself up on your elbows you give him a teasing smile, “you like it?” 

Yeonjun leans down to press yet another hungry kiss, this time to your tattoo. “It’s the sexiest fucking thing anyone has ever done for me”, he breathes out as his tongue drags across the text. He spends the next thirty minutes biting and sucking at the spot, leaving you sore and bruised, though he makes it up immediately by giving you exactly what you crave. 

SOOBIN 

not a tattoo guy himself, so he will be very surprised to see that you got one. 

asks over and over again if it hurt. 

when you reassure him that it didn’t he’ll feel at ease and actually appreciate the fact that you got a tattoo of his lyrics. 

very shy to admit that he thinks it’s extremely sexy that you got it. 

Soobin is lounged on the sofa in the living room of your shared apartment when you call for him from the shower. “Could you bring me an extra towel, Binnie?” your voice carries through the hallway and your boyfriend is quick to get up. 

Upon entering the bathroom, a towel in his hand he finds you by the mirror, towel wrapped around your body as you run your hands through your wet hair. “Oh thanks, babe”, you take the towel from him and run it through your hair. Soobin doesn’t reply as his gaze is stuck on your left forearm. 

“What’s that?”, he asks and points at your arm. Smiling, you stretch your arm out to show him the small quote of his lyrics engraved on your forearm. Your boyfriend’s eyes widen as he stares at the tattoo. Immediately he takes your arm in his large hands, gently caressing the tattoo, “didn’t it hurt?” he asks worriedly. You shake your head, “got it for you, Binnie”, you smile at the way his ears turn pink. “I love it..”, he whispers as he bites his bottom lip gently. 

BEOMGYU

absolutely loves it, bonus points if it’s tattooed on your thigh. 

always touching it, though he doesn’t care if you choose to show it off or not. 

“shoulda gotten my name tattooed as well, babe” 

probably thought it was a little cheesy when he first saw it, though he quickly grew to love it. 

Beomgyu places you down on the kitchen counter as he claims your lips in a feverish kiss. His hands push your legs apart as they travel beneath your skirt. Grazing over your thighs they stutter as they come in contact with the unfamiliar feel of plastic. "What's that?” he moans against your lips. 

Hands pushing your skirt up, Beomgyu breaks the kiss to glance down at your thigh, wrapped in a thin layer of plastic are the lyrics of his own song staring right back up at him. You bite your bottom lip as you search his eyes with your own, “thought you’d like it…”, you say as you play with the strands of your hair. 

Beomgyu raises an eyebrow as he flashes you a smirk, “my shit that good, huh?”. You grin and roll your eyes as he reattaches his lips with yours. The kiss is hot and messy, teeth clashing with each other as Beomgyu’s hands gently grope at the fresh tattoo. Pulling your lip between his teeth before letting it go, “get one of my name next, yeah?” 

TAEHYUN

the most chill about it out of all of them. 

literally thinks you look good in anything so a tattoo he would definitely fancy. 

the fact that it’s his lyrics definitely is a huge turn on for him. 

probably wouldn’t tell you but he likes when you have it on display for others to see as it shows that you’re his. 

The door locks click as you shut it behind you, quickly shaking off your shoes as you call out for your boyfriend. Upon entering his work room you’re a giggling mess, immediately drawing his attention toward you. Taehyun gives you a questioning look as your eyes meet his, he sighs, “what have you been up to this time?”. 

You roll your eyes, “nothing much, just…” you pull the neckline of your shirt to the side, revealing a brand new tattoo on your collarbone. Not just any tattoo though. Taehyun’s eyes widen every so slightly as he eyes the tattoo, a small smirk tugging at his lips, he pulls you onto his lap. 

Wrapping your arms around his neck as you practically push your chest into his face. “How’s it look?” you ask sweetly. Taehyun presses a kiss to your neck as he groans against your skin, “it looks like you’re fucking mine”. 

HUENINGKAI

would so so so love it. thinks it’s a huge commitment on your part and it makes him feel special. 

the type to trace the letters of the lyrics on your skin any chance he gets, or just hum along to the song. 

asks if the two of you can get matching ones next. 

lots of kisses to it as well. 

Your boyfriend was a huge cuddle lover, so it wasn’t unusual for the two of you to be sprawled out on the sofa with his head on your stomach as you lazily play with his soft locks. Huening was half asleep as he drew small circles on your hip. Letting out a yawn as you stretch, causes your shirt to ride up ever so slightly, just enough to reveal the small outline of a tattoo. 

Your boyfriend immediately wakes up fully as he pushes your shirt up further to reveal a short fragment of lyrics engraved in your skin, his lyrics. “Baby what’s…”, he begins as his fingers softly trace the letters. “Hm?” you ask still not realizing entirely what he was talking about, when your eyes follow his they land on the tattoo you’d gotten of his song. 

“The lyrics really spoke to me, much like you do”, you smile upon seeing the pink blush dusting your boyfriend’s cheeks. “Really..? This is…wow..”, he says as his fingers glide along the lyrics, he gently leans forward and presses a soft kiss to it, making you giggle. “It tickles”, you protest but your boyfriend doesn’t seem to hear you as he continues showing his newfound love for your tattoo.

→ want to get notified whenever a new dream is published? join my TAGLIST ★ all rights reserved ─ @beomiracles 2024

#txt #txt fanfic #kang taehyun #choi beomgyu #choi yeonjun #choi soobin #huening kai #beomgyu x reader #taehyun x reader #soobin x reader #yeonjun x reader #hueningkai x reader #txt smut #txt fluff #beomiracles ₊˚⊹ ᰔ #txt post #beomiracles soft thoughts ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 #beomiracles hard thoughts ✧˖ #kpop imagines #txt imagines #idk what to tag anymore

[formula1blog]

Bust the windows out your car

Part 1 - Traitor

Part 2- Take me back to the night we met

Part 3- You are here

EX Charles Leclerc x Singer Fem!reader

Summary: You publish a new album dedicated to your ex. And maybe let yourself get a little crazy.

Wc: 824

A/N: All the songs belong to their right full owners.

Tag list: @loloekie @callsignwidow

It had been a couple days since everything took place. There had been lots of breakdowns, calls from Charles, hating yourself and more break downs. There wasn't a day when Charles wouldn't text you. Messages were flowing in and you let them all read. You knew that if you spoke to him, you forget everything that happens the moment you see his green eyes. You jump right back into his arms.

Right now you were sitting on the couch, talking about your new album. "I don't know if it is a good idea," Pierre pointed out. "It is still illegaal and you probably have to pay for a new one." He had listened to your idea of shooting a video clip for your new single "Bust the window out of your car." Your idea was to go back to his apartment and look for his Ferrari in the garage. It would be great to let your anger out.

"I don't care about having to buy a new one. It is about sending a message and having a great clip for the single. He needs to know about the pain I go trough. This wasn't just some game for me. " Kika had cheered you on. She had gone with you to buy some baseball bats to hit the windows in. It was a red one to match the car and all of Charles's red flags.

You had written two songs about smashing his car. The other one was called 'Before you cheat'. You wanted to have prove by your lyrics.

The next day you found yourself back in Monaco. Everywhere you looked it reminded you of him. You knew Charles would be away at this time, still knowing his calendar by heart.

Walking inside the garage it didn't take long to spot the red Ferrari. Deep down it did hurt knowing your were going to ruin a piece of art, but it was the consequences he had to deal with. "There you are. I want to apolise for what is going to happen." You spoke to it like it understood you.

Pierre stood at the entrance looking out if no one was coming down stairs. He didn't like this. He knew that Charles wouldn't report you to the police, at least he hoped he wouldn't, that thought calmed him down a bit. But then Charles is also hurt. You never know what comes out of that.

The camera was pointing right at the car, which was gladly standing alone with no other cars around it. You didn't want to accidentally ruin someone else car.

Before you knew it you had hit in one of the windows and glass was flying everywhere. You grabbed one of your keys to leave a puncture in the tyre. Doing some poses on the hood of the red car and laying on top of it. You mounted the lyrics of the song pointing your head to the camera. 

Time went by and you had all of the material you needed for the clip. The car was ruined, but he deserved it. He can afford a new one. Just like he can afford a new girlfriend. You look around hoping no one spotted you/ "Where is Pierre?" You ask as you cannot find him anymore. Kika looked at you with a pity face. "Charles was here. Pierre went after him. " Your eyes widens at the mention of Charles. He was here? He didn't stop you? Kika shrugs her shoulders as if she knew what you were thinking. "Don't pay attention to him." You gathered up your stuff and left behind all the pieces of your broken heart. 

Y/N!L/N: New album out!!!! Stream ' Sixteen' on all platforms.

Y/N!L/N

I want to thank to people who helped me get trough a hard time. I love you all.<3

-----

KiKaGomez: 🩷🩷🩷

KikaGomez: Absolute great music as always

-> Y/N!L/N: Thank you, gorgeous

Pierregasly: bonne musique, Y/n

-> Y/N!L/N: Merci Beaucoup Pierre

LoveYn: Mother is mothering

ILoveYN: Did anyone see that video clip by "bust the window out your cars??????????????????

-> f1b1tch: Yess, it looks a lot like his own car

-> carsf1: She ruined a ferarri

Totwolfflove: Charles is in the likes

-> Slutforyn: This is not a drill

SlayYn: Finally, new song. I love them all

F1Yn: Did they really break uo??

-> ClYn: I think. Pretty sure the album is about Charles and it are not nice songs.

-> F1addict: He is still in the likes

MaxVerstappen1: great album

-> User729: Max?????

-> mvetcl: Arianna, what are you doing here?

-> Y/N!LN: Thank you Max

Charlesleclerc: ❤️

-> User92: The audacity this man has

->ynlovw: Delulu much

-> Pierregasly: Mate, wtf

-> F1yn: Even Pierre is confused

Do you want another part?

#Charles leclerc #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc 16 #charles leclerc x reader #f1 #formula 1 #charles leclerc imagine #pierre gasly #kika gomes

[sage-green-matcha]

MIRRORBALL - ETHAN LANDRY 🪩

“I want you to know, I’m a mirrorball. I’ll show you every version of yourself tonight.” - Taylor Swift

Content includes: fluff, awkward singing at the end, kissing, low key awkward, light smut! Lots of Taylor Swift references ;)

Swiftie Reader x Ethan Landry!

<3

<3

<3

You stood uncomfortably at the side of the party, your heels were wet with alcohol, the shining silver being hit by the artificial rainbow lights. You took off your headband, playing with the disco balls that stuck out the top. The light reflected onto you and you wondered why no one talked to you, or came up to you to dance. It was always you that had to do it.

You were shining, glistening. And Ethan was one of the only people that noticed. The way you shined pulled his eyes in like a deer with headlights. He couldn't stop looking at you, and he wondered why others didn't look at you at all.

You decided to suck it up, looking for anyone to pull out to dance. Your eyes lit up when you spotted Ethan, you knew he was chads roommate and he was also in your Econ class, you also may or may not have a small, flourishing crush on him. "Hey, Ethan" The music got quieter as you approached him, your dress making a tassel sound as you walked. "Hi...what are you?" "Oh, I'm a mirrorball...well I'm a disco ball...It's a Taylor Swift thing" "Oh, I don't know that much about her but cool, you...you look pretty" he could get a closer look at your face. Your eyes were gently patted with silver and white eyeshadow, small gems around your eyes.

"Thanks...I mean thank you, you wanna dance?" You hid your face, blushing at his words "I'm not very good at it" You smiled, your eyes creasing up when you did. "Me either" you shrugged. "Uh, alright then" you took him by the hand, pulling him into the living room. A new song started up, a smile on your face as soon as you recognized the melody. "This is Taylor isn't it?" He'd seen you get excited about a song once or twice before, going home and looking up the songs. He actually enjoyed them, learning the lyrics just for you.

You spun him around, a laugh escaping your mouth since he spun the wrong way. "I think you can do the spinning" he blushed. You stood on your tiptoes, heels gliding you on the wooden floor. The light hit your dress and the shatters of silver light hit Ethan's skin. He was mesmerized by you. You were more than underrated. He didn't understand how no one took you into consideration. It upset him, almost making him mad.

You were such a good person, yet you were always dragged around or left behind. It's like the two of you were tied together with an Invisible string. You were like him, and you didn't make him feel bad about it, unlike Mindy or Sam. "You're shining" You'd never seen someone look at you like that before. It made you feel special. "Just for you" he paused at your words, pulling you closer.

You pressed your hand against his chest, looking up to meet eyes."It's rude to stare, Landry" You barely had time to think before you felt his lips pressed onto yours. He was fearless as he kissed you, making you melt deep into him, closing your eyes. The cherry alcohol seeped from your mouth into his, the taste addicting just like the soft feel of his lips.

His hands were placed on your hips as you pulled away, going back for air. You rested your arms on his shoulders, pulling him back in for another, deeper kiss. "What is happening here? Uhm are we just gonna ignore the fact that these two are practically fucking each other right now?" Mindy's eyes were wide, Chad with a smile on his face.

"Ethan! And that's how you get the girl!! My man!" Chad smiled excitedly. You pulled away, looking at them confused."Mindy shut up, you and Anika are always all up on each other" Chad patted Ethan on the back, standing awkwardly. "Uhm, I think we're gonna head out but I'll see you newlyweds later" Anika joined Mindy's side, waving at you with a small smile.

"Should uhm, we also go?" "We can go to my apartment" his eyes beamed and he nodded, following you out. The walk to your apartment was quiet, small chatter from time to time. You were both too nervous thinking about what might happen tonight to talk. "Do you live far from here?" You shook your head. "I rent a place on Cornelia Street, so only about a 10-minute walk" You were wonderstruck as you walked alongside him, blushing with each step.

You felt your heart race as you unlocked the door, closing it behind him. It smelled just like you, the sweet vanilla chai fragrance filling his nose. He noticed you taking your shoes off, leaving them by the door. "Oh uh, do you want me to take them off?" "If you want" you shrugged. You wrapped around your kitchen, going over to the fridge. "You want something to drink?" "I'm fine. Thank you" he smiled sweetly before looking back down, your cat sitting down on his feet.

"That's Toby, he can be a bit dumb sometimes but he's really friendly" You took a drink of your water, Toby scurrying over to you in a hurry. You picked up the kitten, throwing him over your shoulder as Ethan followed you into your bedroom.

He was in awe, the room was covered in string lights, vines, and curtails hanging from your ceilings. The posters on your wall were messy but also organized, and a record shelf in the corner of your room. Your room smelled different than the rest of your house, the incense on your shelf creating a deep, burned scent. "I don't think I've ever seen one of these" he spun the side of your record gently. He glanced to another corner of your room, noticing a small piano with books piled up on the side. Two guitars hung on the wall.

You came up behind him, wrapping your arm around his waist, taking his hand in the direction of the needle. "Pick it up...and place it on the disc" You guided his hand as he let it drop carefully, the first track from the vinyl playing. "You have all her albums?" "Yea..." you sat on the bed, taking him with you.

The soft sound of "My Tears ricochet" spilled into your room, your head on his shoulder as your kitten sat in his lap. "He likes you" you giggled, Ethan's hand gently petting him. You liked that about Ethan, he was shy and gentle, with you and your friends, with classmates and teachers. He could do no harm.

He was the kind of boy that would bring you flowers, handing one to your little sister to make her feel special too. He took everyone into thought, he wasn't like the regulars, and he didn't engage in revelry or try to go out of his way to impress girls. His grades and perfect hundreds didn't impress you, they kinda intimidated you. He reminded you so much of yourself if you hadn't been curved and bent under the pressure of your parents and teachers.

"You know...I listened to all of Taylor's albums because I wanted to bring it up with you. But I've been too shy to say anything...I've actually grown to really like her...her music is a bit too relatable" Your face was flooded in a maroon color. "You did that for me?" His smile began to look like a smirk, making you roll your eyes.

You looked over at the clock on your nightstand, it was already midnight. "I'm assuming I'm allowed to stay over?" You nodded. He knew you'd want him to stay, he had already made himself at home. You watched as Toby wobbled out of the room, a small adoring smile on both of your faces. "He's really cute, takes after his mom" "You're really cute too" You pressed your forehead against his, your thumb lightly swiping his bottom lip.

He placed his hand on your neck, thumb rubbing your jawline softly as he pulled you closer. It's like he was doing it on purpose, teasing you knowing you would break first. You didn't care, falling on top of him, the material of your dress falling on his skin. Your lips were desperate for more, your hand running up under his shirt. You were sure Ethan was just skinny and lanky, but with the way those collared shirts hugged his biceps, you should've known better.

He let out a small whimper, your thumb matching the same pattern he did on your jawline. His warm hands climbed up your back, lips continuing to kiss you, slowly pulling away to give attention to your neck. You were surprised about how good he was, it's like he already knew everything that would make you feel good. "Can I take it off?" He pulled away, waiting for your response. You nodded and he didn't hesitate, pulling down the zipper slowly.

You sat up, peeling the silver dress off of yourself. His eyes widened when he realized you didn't have a bra on underneath. You placed it gently to the side since it was kinda expensive. You bought it with this exact scenario in mind, you bought it so he could take it off of you. "I would've taken that off much sooner if I'd known you didn't have anything underneath" you chuckled, collapsing into him with another kiss. You became hungry for his lips, his skin. You wanted him so badly. Your stomach was overflowing with butterflies, you'd never had someone so close to you before.

His hand cupped one of your boobs, thumb lightly flicking your hard nipple. You frowned when he pulled away, instead his hands now grabbing your waist, pulling you onto his lap. You looked down at him, a smile on your lips. He looked so good from here. You ran your hands through his hair, sitting yourself on top of him as his hands roamed your body. He was addicted to the soft feel of your skin, the way it smelled, and the small marks that were sprinkled all over it. He wanted to make more on you, on your neck, your chest. He wanted everyone to know that you were his.

You felt him grow hard underneath you, a small gasp escaping your lips. He closed the space between you, kissing and licking at your neck. Sucking on your skin with just enough pressure to make it enjoyable but to also leave a mark. Boldness flooded him as he saw the first hickey he made. Now anyone that saw that would know you were his, only his.

☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆

You cuddled up to the blanket, body bare beside the panties that you managed to get on. Your eyes were glued to Ethan's face, his soft breaths mixing in with the sound of the end of your record. It put the two of you to sleep, waking up to the repeating sound of static.

You watched as he fluttered his eyes open, smiling once he caught you staring. "Creep" "Don't act like you don't like it" You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling yourself into his chest. Your warmth mixed, bare boobs on his chest as you played with his hair, Ethan's eyes never coming off of you.

You combed your hands through his brown curls, pulling out face-framing pieces that tickled his forehead. He smiled, closing his eyes. "Stop acting so sweet" you scoffed. "Acting? I'm so sweet Y/n, what do you mean?" He teased, pulling you into a kiss with his hands on your back.

He looked over you, eyes back on the corner of instruments he saw when he came in. "You can play all of those?" You turned to see what he was talking about, forgetting the own layout of your room. "Yea" you got out from under the covers, Ethan frowning at the loss of contact. He watched you as you walked to your closest, pulling an oversized tee over your body.

"You look better topless" you mocked his words, grabbing your guitar from off the wall. You tuned it up a little, Ethan watching you with curiosity. You plucked the first couple of strings and he was taken back. He didn't want to say he thought you'd suck...but he really thought you were gonna suck.  He watched as your fingers glided along the neck of the guitar, fingers on the strings as your other hand plucked them carefully.

"Yea I showed up at your party, will you have me? Will you love me?"

Your head rested on the guitar, smiling at Ethan as he watched you with awe. Your soft voice filled his ears, his heart melting with your voice.

"Will you kiss me on the porch in front of all your stupid friends?"

You exaggerated your expression, Ethan biting back his lip with his his hand on his jaw, holding up his head as you sang. You were really perfect at everything. He couldn’t think of anything better that he could be doing, well besides you. But he already did that. His admiration for you only grew with each second, a hot feeling in his stomach. He felt like a little schoolboy with a crush, except he actually had a chance.

"If you kiss me, will it be just like I dreamed it? Will it patch your broken wings?" I'm only 17, I don't know anything but I know I miss you"

#cute #fanfic #celebrities #ethan landry #scream #avatar #ethan landry smut #jack champion #jack champion x reader #romantic killer #jack champion scream #ethan landry oneshot #ethan landry x you #jack champion x y/n #Jackchampionxreader #ethan landry x y/n #EthanLandryxyou #ethan landry x reader #scream 6 smut #scream smut #taylor swift #idk lol #light smut #folklore #mirrorball

[lnfours]

nonsense | t.h

summary -> inspired by ‘nonsense’ by sabrina carpenter. dedicated to @darling-im-wonderstruck and @kate-bishopss <3

au -> tom holland x singer!reader

wc -> 1.6k

warnings -> unedited, fluff, tom being bf material, a little bit of language and sexual innuendos

masterlist | listen

                        ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

you sighed softly as you sat in the interview chair, tapping your fingers against your leg as your hairstylist and makeup artist applied some last minute touches before the camera turned on.

your new single had been on top charts for the past couple months, your album was coming out in a few short weeks, a tour was on the agenda for later this year. everything felt like it was finally slotting into place.

your fans had shown an insane amount of support from the number of streams and pre-saves for your new music, everything career wise made you feel on top of the world.

personal life wise, not so much.

you had met tom awhile back, the two of you had instantly connected while he was filming the latest spider-man movie. you two had gone out on a couple dates, hooked up a few times, the usual.

he checked all the boxes. he was caring and sweet, he made you feel like a queen, and he made sure you knew just how special you were to him.

however, whenever he was around, you felt knots in your stomach. the nervousness would set in whenever he was near. whenever you talk, you’d feel like you were speaking nonsense. all the nervousness is what kept you from jumping into something with him, but he was adamant about waiting for you. he didn’t want anyone else but you.

he didn’t care if it made him sound desperate, didn’t care about the girls in his dms or the ones who would text him and ask if he was seeing anyone. he only wanted you.

the camera started rolling and the interviewer introduced herself, smiling to the camera before introducing you. you smiled and thanked her for having you on before she asked her first question.

“so, ‘nonsense’ has been a huge hit,” she started, “you sing some very, risqué, lyrics, while also talking about how this certain someone makes you feel. did you pull inspiration from real life to write this?”

you nodded, “yeah, i did. i mean, you know that feeling you get when you talk to your crush? the kind of feeling that makes your insides melt? that's kind of how i feel with this person, every time.”

she smiled, “do they know they make you feel that way?”

you nodded, letting out a soft chuckle, “they do, yeah.”

she continued with the next question, “so, fans have speculated that the song is about tom holland, and you guys have been spotted out and about over the past couple months. are they right?”

you shook your head, palms sweating as you thought out your answer, “they’re all so creative with their speculations, but no, it’s not. tom and i are just friends.”

she tilted her head, “really? i mean, so many people have put compilations together of the two of you together and it seems like there’s some real chemistry brewing there.”

you smiled politely, “yeah, no. he’s really sweet, but we’re just friends.”

you felt the knots in your stomach again as you talked about him. just the thought of him made your stomach erupt in butterflies, how were you supposed to be together?

the interview was over after some more questions about the album and tour. you walked back to the dressing room, grabbing your things. as you scrolled through the missed texts on your phone, only one stood out to you the most.

tom: you were great ❤️

you smiled softly, going to reply, but your thought were interrupted when your manager walked in the door.

“the cars here,” she smiled, “ready?”

you tucked your phone back into your purse, “yeah,”

you walked outside of the building, saying hi and greeting some fans who waited outside. you took pictures, signed autographs, but the only thing on your mind was that text.

you pulled your phone back out as you got into the car, the driver heading back to your apartment building.

y/n: thank you ❤️

your fingers hovered over the keyboard, contemplating sending what you were thinking. you didn't understand why you were so nervous around him, why everything he did made your heart race or why he made your tongue go numb like all of a sudden you’re speaking gibberish.

none of it made sense, but then again, did it really have to? wasn’t the whole point of falling in love with someone about risks and growing together?

it was, right?

wanna get dinner tonight?

you locked your phone as soon as the ‘read’ popped up at the bottom of your message. you nervously bounced your leg, trying to fight back the urge to say ‘never mind’ as you watched the city life outside the dark tinted window.

your phone buzzed twice in your hand and you hesitated before looking down at the message on your lockscreen.

thought you’d never ask

meet at your place around 7?

you smiled down at your phone, your manager looking over at you as she spoke up, “nice job dodging those questions about tom earlier. i know how important your private life is, we want to keep it that way.”

you nodded, typing back your response before looking back at her. desperately trying to steady your heartbeat.

sounds good, spider-boy ❤️

“yeah,” you sighed, “i mean its not like i completely lied to them. we are just friends.”

“friends who hook up and get dinner on sunset?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. you sighed as she giggled, “i mean, i know there’s something brewing, anyone with eyes does, but why wait?”

you shrugged, “he just makes me nervous, almost like he’s too good to be true.”

“for as long as i’ve known you, if anyone deserves the ‘it’s too good to be true’, it’s you.”

you nodded, a soft smile on your face as the driver pulled up in front of your apartment building. you said your goodbyes, heading into the building and making your way into the elevator. you sighed, pressing the button for your floor.

maybe she was right. she almost always was.

the next few hours felt like the longest ever as you got ready. your hair was still styled almost perfectly from before, you touched up your makeup, and slipped on one of your favorite dresses. you felt good, and you looked good.

you were in the bathroom, applying some lip gloss in the mirror when you heard the knock on the door. you ruffled your hair one last time before making your way down the stairs and to the door, the clicking of your heels echoing throughout the penthouse.

you opened the door, smiling as tom stood in a dress shirt and dress pants. his sunglasses pushed back the curls that would normally fall in front of his forehead.

he looked so damn good.

he could say the same about you, though. his eyes traveled down your body as soon as you opened the door. he smiled as he handed you the bouquet of flowers from his grasp.

you thanked him and let him inside. he closed the door behind him and followed you into the kitchen where you were adding the new bouquet to the vase on the island.

“you look gorgeous, love,” he smiled as he took your hand. you laughed as he spun you around in a small circle, pulling you into his chest.

the smell of his cologne was embedded in your brain. after many nights of rolling over and smelling it on the pillows on the other side of your bed, or on one of the blankets on the couch he claimed was his, it smelled familiar. the feeling it gave you almost felt like home.

“so do you,” you grinned, “where are you taking me tonight, holland?”

“mm,” he hummed, “i booked a reservation for that italian place you like.”

you felt your heartbeat quicken as his nose brushed up against yours, “the key to my heart.”

he laughed softly, “seems you figured out what the key to mine is.”

you sent him a questioning look, “what’s that?”

“writing a song about me,” he smiled, “or, as you say, ‘about you and me’.”

you let out a chuckle, “you listened to it?”

“of course,” he playfully rolled his eyes, “it’s an honor to have a pop hit written about me, y’know.”

you hit his arm playfully, “stop.”

“stop what?”

“being so,” you trailed off for a second, “perfect.”

“you deserve nothing less, y/n.”

you felt the heat rise to your cheeks, and if he wasn’t holding you by the waist, you probably would’ve toppled over.

“you just make me so nervous,” you breathed out, “i’ve never felt this way about anyone else before.”

he smiled, “me either,” you returned the smile, “i know i’ve said it before, but i want it all with you. all the nervous jitters, the pillow talks, the dancing in the kitchen, all of it.”

in that moment, you put your nerves aside and let yourself give in.

“i want it all with you, too,” you mumbled, leaning closer to his lips. he smiled against yours as he kissed you sweetly, the both of you pulling away and erupting into soft chuckles.

your laugh grew louder when he picked you up, ignoring your protesting as he started up the stairs to your bedroom.

“what about our dinner reservation?” you laughed, fingers hooking into the waistband of his pants.

“you asked how quickly i can take my clothes off,” he said as he laid you down on your bed, “and there’s only one way to find out, love.”

                        ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

💌 beings my tagged list has gotten so long that tumblr literally won't let me add it, the tagged list is temporarily closed until i can figure it out. in the meantime, be sure to follow and turn on notifications for @toms-gf to be notified whenever i post imagines :)

xoxo,

jordan <3

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland imagine #spiderman #spider-man #spider-man: homecoming #tom holland x fem!reader #tom holland fluff #tom holland x you #tom holland x singer!reader #tom holland au #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland fic #tom holland x y/n #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader fluff #singer!reader #singer!au #the format might be shitty bc i uploaded it on mobile #oh well #idc #like #reblog #marvel #mcu #imagine #tholland imagines

[luvghostie]

Slashers reaction to S/o singing WAP and dancing

I love requests like this!! You just made my day<3

╰┈➤𝐒𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐒/𝐎

𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐀𝐏 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆.ೃ࿐

{𝘎𝘕 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘴𝘦𝘮𝘪 𝘕𝘚𝘍𝘞, + 𝘓𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘨𝘦}

*ೃ༄ 𝐌𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐞𝐥 𝐌𝐲𝐞𝐫𝐬

Michael was cleaning his knife when he heard music. He looked around the whole house before spotting you dancing in the room you shared. That's when the lyrics hit him- “wet what now?” he thought.

Michael is very old so a song that says wet ass pussy a lot will be very new to him. Don't think he doesn't find your dancing sexy as hell though. It's just, who the fuck made the song?

It takes you a while before noticing he's behind you. Good thing you aren't a victim, your ass would've been dead. Now, two things could happen. He'll either walk away like he didn't see anything or he'll put them hips to work;)

*ೃ༄ 𝐁𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐲

Baby will be dancing with you no matter where it's at. She didn't know WAP previously, however, it's now her favorite song. Mother Firefly will even encourage you guys on dancing and having fun together. Granted, she doesn't know the song but go for it kiddos!!

You definitely have danced together in the shower before. With and without clothes on. Tiny had to mop up the water you dripped getting out (he still hasn't gotten over it, like how do clothes hold that much water?!)

Baby also spends most of her money on dancing outfits for you and her. There is a stage baby usually has her special performance on. Now, it's for the two of you and whatever unique thing you come up with as a couple.

*ೃ༄ 𝐎𝐭𝐢𝐬 𝐃𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐝

When he hears the song it causes him to laugh harder than ever. People make songs about anything nowadays huh?

Otis watches you dance for hours on end. Just know you'll be having to show him your moves in the bedroom as well. If it helps he'll turn on music for you to get the rhythm and courage going again.

Whenever Baby or you play WAP now he forever thinks of messing up your insides. Yes, Baby knows all the lyrics to that song now. The Firefly house has many rooms but thin walls.

*ೃ༄ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠

Spaulding can be pissed at times but other times he's a really fun guy. It's not your fault though, he just hates his job. If you catch him in a good mood he'll watch you dance for a bit. Soon enough he'll try to copy some of the moves to make you giggle.

If you catch him at a bad time though he'll make fun of you for personal gain.

Later that night when he's had time to cool off just ask him about it. It'll mean a lot to him to have someone interested about his feelings and his day.

*ೃ༄ 𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐡𝐦𝐬 𝐇𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐞

Brahms has no idea about what WAP means. Honestly, it's better if you don't tell him anyways. He still likes the way you dance and match the beat. It makes him feel funny... which basically means he wants that ass.

Brahms will get shy and try to hide his face from you. You caught him staring and now he's embarrassed. Give him a kiss though and everything will be A-okay.

*ೃ༄ 𝐓𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞

Tiffany loves when you participate in the little things she does. You guys steal together, kill together, sleep together, all the fun makings of every good couple. Seeing you smiling and dancing, she knew she must join in.

You'll have to teach Tiff the moves and some of the lyrics first. She loves to learn new things from you and is a hands-on learner.

Once you finish the song and are done with choreography she'll confess something. “I found dancing together kinda hot actually” she's now thought of a great new foreplay.

*ೃ༄ 𝐃𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞

Dollface will support you 100% when you dance to any song. She'll even throw dollar bills at you. It's one thing when she does it, but if someone else chimes in she'll cut their throat open. No fucks with her S/o.

When the funhouse opens up you can have your own room to dance in if you wish. Anyone that touches or makes crude remarks just let Doll know!!

*ೃ༄ 𝐀𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐧

When art saw you dancing he pushed you aside. He's been waiting for so long to bust these moves and teach you how to truly dance. Don't make fun of him trying to twerk though he'll give the silent treatment. Not like he can talk anyways... but still.

If you don't mind Art popping his clownussy then go ahead and start dancing with him. I promise, he won't push you aside this time. Just don't steal his spotlight or he'll pout.

*ೃ༄ 𝐃𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝

Just like Otis, he'll watch you dance for hours. Doomhead finds you very beautiful and your body is something he desires all the time. Seeing you dancing, shit, he couldn't control himself.

From now on doom will have you dance/strip for him before having sex. Night, day, outside, inside, he'll fuck you senseless.

Doom also carries a photo of your body in his wallet. He doesn't show anyone the picture since your his and it's not their business.

#reqs open #ask me anything #headcanon #reader x character #slashers #art the clown #art the clown x reader #baby firefly x reader #baby firefly #captain spaulding #doomhead #doomhead x reader #michael myers x reader #tiffany valentine x reader #dollface #brahms heelsire x reader #otis driftwood x reader #horror slashers #horror community #love you guys #loveyourself #slasher x you #gn reader

[redhairedwolfwitch]

f you for ruining barcelona for me - Aitana Bonmatí x Reader - Part 2

A/n: here's the link to part 1 - Secret Love Song + here is the anger that follows the heartbreak

Barcelona was the first place where you had ever fallen in love, right up until the day you left, needing to escape the ghosts of the past. The nature of the secret relationship, hiding from the world, it ruined a lot of things for you, even in the sweet moments, you two were so desperate to hide. 

You couldn’t watch certain tv shows because you’d watched them with her in a blanket fort in her home or your former one. Certain songs made you grimace because you’d danced the night away with her in your kitchen or hers. You almost cried at the movie being shown on the plane because it was one you’d watched alone, on an evening that she had something more important to do.

You hid out in England with a few acquaintances you’d met during international duty, having been called up for some friendlies after showing your skills at Barcelona had grown. Nobody knew you’d gone from fuelling yourself with desperation for Aitana’s attention, to fuelling yourself with anger, because you deserved better.

You were hiding out in England when the summer transfer window opened, and your free transfer to Wolfsburg was announced. You’d become a free agent when choosing not to renew with Barcelona, much to the team’s disappointment as time ran out for your renewal to be announced like they were hoping. Only Jana, Mapi and Ingrid knew you weren’t going to stay, eventually the captains found out too, but nobody really knew you had left Barcelona at first.

Until you posted on your stories, a mirror selfie with a chosen audio that left Aitana’s skin crawling, and nearly everyone else who saw it confused. Jana replied to the story saying she missed you, whilst Mapi spotted the new tattoo you’d gotten, then enquired about the music, and the lyrics on the screen with the selfie.

‘I heard you’re better off and you’re doing fine, I heard that you’re in love, good fucking try. Did it even hurt, ‘cause you didn’t cry, I know we said forever but I guess we lied…’ the music sampling another of the artist’s that Aitana had heard before, playing in your home back in Barcelona. She hoped you weren’t calling her out, but then your farewell to Barcelona post came up on her Instagram feed.

‘Barcelona, the city and the club, it’s time for me to say farewell. You have been with me since the start and watched me grow as a player, and as a person. But it’s time for me to move on, the city is haunted with ghosts, but I will never forget anyone, you all taught me so much. You taught me what I really deserve, and I will take that with me in my next adventure. Barcelona, you saw me fall in love, but you also saw my heartbreak, and how I lost myself. I am finding myself again, and I know what I deserve. Wolfsburg, you will not know what is going to hit you, but first up is the World Cup. Te amo, Barcelona siempre<3’

You weren’t exactly subtle with your farewell message, a mix of sadness and passive aggressiveness that made it clear that you were nursing a heartbreak, and it was because of that, that you decided to leave.

The post was from days ago, but somehow she had only just seen it now, spotting that you had posted something onto your story too, from hours ago. She almost smiled as the video showed you singing along to a song on the radio, before realising what the song was, making her heart ache. ‘You made me hate this city!’ your voice echoed in her ears, making her close instagram and wipe away the tears. She had convinced herself you deserved better, better than her.

It didn’t help that your leaving had become gossip around the Barcelona team, wondering what the hell had happened to drive you to leave, or in some cases, who the hell had driven you to want to leave, because they all thought you would stay.

None of them knew you were in a relationship, but Mapi and Ingrid admitted they both thought you had something going on. Jana knew the truth, even though you had never told her who it was, she figured it out.

“I was there. She would cancel plans on them, string them along, refuse to be seen together in public, even in a cinema in the dark! They smiled less, just wanting her to look at them during training, to celebrate their goals together, but my best friend was not a priority to her, not like her career. She made my best friend her dirty little secret, then walked away! She ruined Barcelona for them!” Jana didn’t mean to rant, going from calm to angry too quickly, but the song playing over the stereo didn’t help, knowing the song had been one you had listened to in the car to the airport. Crash and Burn by Maggie Lindemann.

“When-”

“Día de San Valentín.” Jana sighed, feeling tears prickle in her eyes but she ignored them in favour of her phone buzzing with a message from you.

“Where are they now?” Irene enquired, knowing that you were definitely not in Spain after seeing some videos of you hanging out in England with some WSL players, then some photos of you exploring Germany with some of your new teammates.

“Waiting on a plane for the World Cup.” Jana replied, sending you a reply for a safe trip, even if that was in the hands of the plane and the pilot, more than yourself.

“You mentioned training and goals… someone on the team? And none of us noticed?” 

Jana caught Aitana’s gaze for a moment, but she didn’t drop Aitana in it and tell them everything she knew.

“So desperate to hide, my best friend hid everything, but they wore their heart on their sleeve, before it was ripped out when she walked away on Día de San Valentín… it was bad, but they loved her, so they never talked shit about her, even if it was deserved. You were a terrible girlfriend, you ruined Barcelona for them, and you ruined love too.” Jana’s voice was quiet, but stern, not realising she was holding Aitana’s gaze for a little too long, until Mapi was frowning, and Ingrid turned to see if Mapi was thinking what she was thinking.

“Wait a second-” Mapi was about to call out what she saw, but her phone lit up with a notification of your close friend stories, where there were several recent updates, including a close-up selfie of you at the airport, sat at the gate waiting, and looking half asleep as you stuck up a peace sign.

Another photo showed one of your national teammates curled up asleep in the uncomfortable airport chair, then you had a video of the view of the tarmac, with a fragment of your reflection in the glass, headphones in and a song attached to the video. Fletcher’s ‘fuck you for ruining new york city for me’ but you had added a note ‘*barcelona’.

Clearly you were still healing…

#woso x reader #woso imagine #woso imagines #aitana bonmati x reader #barcelona femeni x reader #aitana bonmati imagine #aitana bonmati imagines #barcelona femeni imagine #barcelona femeni imagines

[screechingkingdomhottub]

DEFENDING NPMD

Time to defend nerdy prudes must die to some of you for not appreciating the utter masterpiece it is as my current hyperfixation.

"These teens aren't realistic they're caricatures" - Sure that could easily be true, and say it is true then it's a high school piece based on cliques/stereotypes that people don't necessarily fit into in reality? That doesn't make it bad, heathers and mean girls are classics at this point. But also I was 3 of these people in secondary. I had an anime phase and I was friends with weebs, they act exactly like richie, like...I told so many people "Believe It!" with a thumbs up. I even played a naruto song to classmates and talked about how he was my idol as a 13 year old...I cringe about that to this day but it's a REAL PHASE. Then we have Ruth who is so horny and desperate for love...literally my teenage life are you kidding? Especially with the theatre reenactments thinking I could do things if I didn't get anxious like...poor girl. I'd like to think I was Peter at one point, I have low blood sugar and like pokemon cards and got decent grades and had a bit of a need to prove myself? But I was probably closer to Grace like ya boi has religious suppressions but I'm catholic so clearly not a person of faith in Grace's eyes haha.

"There's too many rhymes - class of twenty twenty worn"

I think this was intentional? Well not really but also like it makes sense, Jeff said the reason for the snapping being wrong in bully the bully is because they're nerds and that's uncool in jazz which kinda leads me to believe this theory. Also the original lyric was "There's no way to fix the class of 2026" but had to change cause year. One of the songs that doesn't rhyme obsessively is "The Summoning" which is sang primarily by the lords in black as opposed to the high school kids. Now, I don't want to offend anyone but high schoolers are idiots. Everyone is an idiot but high schoolers tend to be egotistical idiots. My theory is the rhyming is sort of a meta commentary of the ages of these characters, believing that things should be rhyming because that's what they've been taught. It keeps the norm of the school also, it shows it fits the standard representation of schools in media and then symbolises this through the representation of a standard song. Whereas the lords in black have some off lyrics, off rhymes, especially here: "Nibbly wants a sacrifice And Wiggly wants his wrath We dancе around the pentagram And take all our kingdoms back" It doesn't fit the other rhymes that happen earlier on sang by the high schoolers. This could represent the lords in black are interfering with the norm, they're older and wiser and follow their own rules. "But screech what about hatchet town" they don't have the same power as the lords in black, the chaos and paranoia is getting to them but there is still more off rhymes than in others. "What are off rhymes what are you doing" A rhyme is like fart and smart. An off-rhyme is like fart "monster" and "Gone sir" it doesn't entirely rhyme but it has that feeling. There's probably a lot more fascinating things that you can get into with this "BUUUT Heathers did it without them sounding so cheesy and unaware" my answer to that is, heathers is fILLED WITH EMOS. Have you spoken to an emo? They'll go like "Even the roaring waves of the sea cannot mimic the immense drowning I feel by my emotions" like dude chill. NPMD doesn't have emos in it really...Everyone is really happy considering the situation.

"Who says cool beans anymore?" - This is the funniest criticism to me like, do you think Grace Chasity is supposed to represent a modern day view? She's the one who says it first! "Shoot and shinola", "tickle on my mommy spot" all that is fine by you but cool beans is outdated??? "But why do the others join herrr" ok well the obvious reason there is they're INSIDE A HAUNTED HOUSE WITH SOMEONE WHO IS VERY SUS AND THEIR WORST BULLY IS COMING AND ALSO GRACE IS THE ONLY ONE WITH THE KEY LIKE I WOULD JUST GO WITH THAT. But if not, nerds quote outdated memes all the time. "Excellent" reminded me of naruto the abridged series, like that's from 2008 but im still there. Or like the phandom are still simping for glabellas and onomatopoeic microwaves. The starkid fandom would never reference an old musical, the medallion said that was dumb so we're not doing that...wait Most valid stuff I've seen is about steph's characterisation which I can do a whole post about like mariah is phenomenal as always but there's a lot of telling not showing.

Also I'm back into starkid

#team starkid #starkid #nerdy prudes must die #npmd #npmd spoilers #starkid npmd

[winterwhisperz-blog]

Hey hey hey! This is just a part two to complete the Ask for: The Main LI reacting to an mc who serenades/sings them a love song.

These are a bit shorter, with only one style MC since I didn’t want to make it too long :,3 but I hope you still enjoy em!!

How The Li React To An MC Who Serenades/Sings Them A Love Song(P2)

Warnings: probably ooc, a lot of creative liberty, one small nearly suggestive comment—but that’s just imo, mean old ladies ):<

Notes: Gender neutral mc, fluff.

ALR LES GO

Mhin

OKAY OKAY SO, you know that one photo of that guy playing for a bunch of kittens? This is what inspired this.

Early morning light washes down the murky streets of Eridia, you let out a small yawn, rubbing the remaining tiredness from your eyes.

“Do you really do this every patrol?” You ask Mhin, who strides beside you, a basket of food carried in their arms.

You found out about their little secret awhile ago, but this was the first time they allowed you to go with them.

They nod, shifting the basket to get a better grip. “If i don’t feed them, they’d be on their own. And unlike most people in this place, they deserve my help.”

You smile, tapping on the case holding your instrument. “Unlike most people? Does that mean I’m an exemption?”

Mhin pauses, cheeks going a pink that matches the rosy dawn. “I didn’t say that.”

“Aww, I knew you liked me.”

Mhin quickens their pace, leaving you behind in almost comical speed. Laughing, you make sure your instrument is secure before chasing after them.

The street gets more coated in grime as you follow them, until finally you stop at a certain alleyway. Your heart sinks at the sight, the knowledge that so many animals rest in such a place is enough for you to feel a crush of sympathy. Mhin crouches down, setting the basket of food on the street.

You follow their example, making yourself smaller as you gently place down your case, unlatching the lid. Eventually, cats slowly emerge from their spots of shadow, sniffing at Mhin’s offered hand before the hunter reaches inside the basket, gathering the food. They spread it out evenly, giving each cat the same amount.

A few cats dubiously regard you, hissing when you hesitantly reach out a hand. “Give them time, they’ll find you trustworthy once they get comfortable with you being here.” Mhin advises, a slender hand petting a sleek black cat.

You chuckle lightly, “Almost like someone else I know.”

They furrow a brow in confusion for a moment before scoffing, looking away as a paint of pink crosses their cheeks.

As the cats continue to eat, you get out your instrument, finding a clean enough spot to settle as you tune it. Once you play a few notes, a few small heads pop up from their food, curious eyes sticking to the sound.

When you play an actual song, fluffy balls of fur wander near your feet—kittens. You try out the song you’ve been writing—a song for Mhin. It was meant to be a surprise, and for a different occasion—but as you watch Mhin’s face slowly register the lyrics, matching the descriptions to themself, it was worth playing it now.

Also Mhin’s definitely in love with you now. I don’t know how anyone wouldn’t be after watching you play for kittens.

AWWWWWWWW

Okay but can we take this moment to appreciate how cute Mhin is? Like they’re so cool but also so cute and I just GAHHHHHHH

Okay okay okay okay now unto Vere

Vere

Vere—oh vere oh vere. Alright- he’s probably gonna be rlly outta character because he’s so flirty and I don’t know how to even come up with flirts 😭 so UHM

I will try my best, but forgive me if I fail you

(I also took creative liberty here because like—I know he hinted at having ‘shows’ in the game but idk what they actually ARE— and in this you trash one before Vere has to go so you can spend time with him—idk if you could actually do that—but for this snippet, you can)

ALR LES GO

You finally manage to spot Vere in the crowd of the Wet Wick—he’s been coming more often ever since you’ve gotten closer. You can’t keep from feeling utterly smug over it. You’re a little out of breath from your…recent adventure. But it was worth it, you’ve been planning this ‘date’ for ages now. And with Vere’s busy schedule, you had no choice but to er…intervene.

You left no traces that you were the one responsible anyway, you’re fine.

Fixing up your hair and dusting off your clothes, you make your way toward Vere, his ears twitching in your direction—and by the subtle pout to his lips you’re guessing he knew you were arriving before you even entered—and he’s upset. Aww, poor little horny Fox man.

You settle next to where he sits, propping your chin on your palms as you bat your pretty lashes at him. He’s not impressed. “Where have you been?” He whispers harshly, eyes roaming over your figure. Eyes squinting as he then sniffs the air, catching a scent on your clothes. His expression sours, and before he can ask any questions, you leap to your feet.

“Nuh uh uh, questions can be for later. I’ve got something for you—“ you glance around at the tavern, mostly for dramatic effect. “—It’s a secret. Follow me.”

You stride out of the tavern, Vere—hopefully at your tail.

He probably would’ve stayed out of spite, but maybe he knew I was writing this snippet and have to make this short—and out of ooc mercy—he did indeed follow you outside the tavern and out into the winding alleyways.

As you walk, Vere gives you another searching look. “Make this quick, I have a show—“

“What show?” You blink innocently at him, and a small smirk slowly lifts his lips.

He definitely knows that look. “What have you been up to?” Another question, but now in an utterly different tone.

“Oh you know, been there and there. Doing this and that. The point is, don’t you want to know what I got you?”

Vere lifts a finger, tapping on his chin as he lightly hums. “Better be something good. That way I may just forgive you for making me wait so long.”

“Aww, you were waiting for me?”

His eyes darken into a glare and you chuckle. “Sorry, sorry. Here—“ you stop at a shadowed area around a cliffside, where you had set up a table with a one dancing flame on a tall candle, and a jar of bloody red roses that reminded you of Vere’s hair.

He regards the scene with at first, a bit of shock, before his eyes glimmer with amusement. “Ah, is this a date? Or a lovely place for you to relax after you push me off the cliff?”

Snickering, you make your way to the table, gesturing for him to sit. “Do you want to find out?”

Watching you carefully, Vere sits, and you begin the very worth it plan you had been scheming.

Thankfully, you never throw Vere off the cliff—not tonight at least. Instead, you treat him to a lovely dinner, before shocking him for the second time by proceeding to serenade him with a love song you had found was his favorite. (vere has a favorite love song?? In this snippet he does 😇)

He tried to make fun of you, but he has to suck it because you’re TOO DANG good at singing for him to come up with any teases. And now he has you sing for him every night you get to spend together. You sing for him while he brushes his tail, while he does skincare, and while he naps cuddled to your side.

Soft vere headcanon is my favorite <3 even though it’s probably way off.

ALR

Now unto the last— *sniffle sniffle* Kuras 😭 the way I love this man is probably unhealthy

Kuras

You’re in the streets of the Amaryllis district, instrument case open and at your feet while you tune. You’re hoping to somehow make some money with your voice and musical skill, instead of doing something like Soulless hunting—or whatever job you may find hidden in the mysterious city.

It’s a flimsy hope, but it’s worth a shot. You first tried out Lowtown, propping yourself by the closest walls and singing the songs that you already knew were crowd pleasers—long story short…they didn’t please -that- crowd.

So now you’re here, giving it another go. The clouds are deep blue with restrained thunder and rain, making you a little nervous before you remember that’s just how weather is like here. Sometimes the clouds just warned of a storm, without actually following through.

You start with your first song, your voice coming out a tad shakier than preferable, anxiety tickling your throat. But you carry on, lyrics lifting in strength as you get comfortable.

Eyes sometimes glance your way, some offering you a pity pause in their steps before strutting off. Disinterested. Others send you annoyed glares, scoffs that make you feel a sting of irritation.

What are they scoffing at? What, have they not heard music before?

An old woman with smoke crawling around her meaty neck stops in her tracks as her watery gaze falls on you—smiling crudely when you cough, putting an erupt end to your performance. “Take a tip from me dear, people don’t pay to only listen to music here. If you want a good coin in your purse, you’ve got to—“

“My apologies, grandma, but I don’t need your tip—unless you’re planning to put one here.” You bump your instrument case with your shoe.

The old woman’s face instantly scowls, a dark whirl of smoke matching the angry clouds above. “Take your shitty show somewhere else, pigeon, if you know what’s good for you.”

With that, the old woman struts away, coughing in her own smoke.

Definitely more annoyed now, you reach down to slam your case shut. “Sparrow, now pigeon, why does everyone insist on calling me some kind of bird?” Before you can close the case, a slender finger plops a bright golden coin into the center. A wave of warmth grazing your cheeks.

Craning your neck, your eyes meet those of pure shining gold. Kuras is crouched in front of you—while still managing to be tall as frick. His lips lift in a small smile. “I hope you aren’t planning to cancel your show so early.”

You blink, instantly getting back to you feet, leaving the case open. “Kuras! Hi! I…hope you didn’t see that.”

His eyes slide to where the old lady walked off, a displeased frown wandering onto his mouth. “Unfortunately, I did.”

You cringe, fiddling with your instrument. “She might be right. No one’s even really paid me attention—I doubt they’ll offer anything more.”

Kuras lightly shakes his head. “Don’t give up on yourself so easily. Many might not appreciate music on the street…” his eyes find yours again, his smile warming your chest. “But I do. Please, continue.”

Feeling both confident and shy under his gaze, you nod before clearing your throat. As you sing, you find yourself replaying a love song you would only mutter to yourself.

It takes you a while to notice that it has started raining. But not on either of you—instead, gentle rays of light cover your heads. Keeping you warm in the midst of otherwise cold rain.

Oh, and by the way, the old lady got utterly drenched. Hah, take that grandma.

ALR WE HAVE REACHED THE END!!

Ty again for the person who asked for this, I had a lot of fun 😭 and I hope you did too! Ty for reading!!

I hope you have an amazing night/day, win at a card game, find the perfect video to watch while you eat, and love yourself 🫶

#virtual novel #touchstarved x reader #touchstarved headcanons #touchstarved game #touchstarved mhin #touchstarved vere #touchstarved kuras #thanks for the ask! #answered asks #WOOO

[ransprang]

thank you to anon for your support <3

if anyone else wants a match up this is our ko-fi

your dmc 5 match up is..... V!!

SFW

V is as unique as they get being that the others find him a bit weird and mysterious. He’ll spit out haikus randomly. Like once you both went to an archery range and before starting he goes, “The eye sees target. Breathe, let the mind feel the shot. Arrow flies to spot”

Your foreign accent is very attractive to V. He gazes at your lips often as you speak (which is a rarity he cherishes) and gives you kisses when you’re done.

Partakes in all of your hobbies with you happily since they are peaceful. Many of your dates together will be relaxing and calming, be it walking around and taking in the landscape or painting.

V was walking around when he was drawn to a lovely street performer, playing a melancholic song. The lyrics spoke to him and he stopped by to listen. You were nearby, and were intrigued by this performer’s song as well. When the song ended, you both went to tip the musician. Your eyes met briefly, and he smiled. “Beautiful song, who is it by?” He asked, looking towards the musician. You blurted out the answer before the singer could, thanks to your wide expertise. V nodded appreciatively, and walked with you as you both turned away from the musician, engaging you in conversation about music. You found it easy to talk to him since the topic was of your interest but soon the conversation flowed to personal topics and you became fast friends with the man. After a few months of hanging out as friends, neither of you could deny your budding feelings for each other and soon began dating.

V would appreciate your art, he is introspective and a poet. You would be inspired by his poetry and he would be inspired by your art. 

"Your art captures the essence of the shadows, Y/N," V sometimes remarked while you were deep in thought sketching, his eyes fixed on your drawing. You were caught off guard by the unexpected compliment, blushed but managed a shy grin. "Th-thank you, V. I, uh, try my best." Leaning against the bookshelf with an air of nonchalant elegance, V responded with a dry chuckle. "Well, your 'best' is quite the masterpiece, a symphony of shadows and silence. Almost as poetic as my familiars." More at ease now, you laughed softly. "I'll take that as a compliment, considering your familiars are the embodiment of your aesthetic."

You and V are both quiet. You both would spend hours listening to music together, while you draw and he sits by you with his head buried in a book, lifting his head once in a while to make a witty remark on the music choice, gently enjoying each other’s companionship.

V is a tall boy although not a strong boy. When he would misplace his walking stick, he would use your head as a handrest for balance since its the perfect height.

V gives off a mystical vibe, he would definitely burn some sage and light some candles with you while wearing his little hippie sandals.

V would advise you to not bottle up your emotions too much and try to deal with them as they come and go. He is an introspective man with the wisdom of the poets. He knows to appreciate the beauty of emotions as a part of his humanity.

NSFW

At first, V would not be that amazing at painting, but he is talented for sure. As you both paint, he keeps getting better. He’d totally paint you naked and hang it in your shared bedroom as a memento.

You can always tell V is horny by how heavy his breathing gets, you can watch his chest rise and fall rapidly. His pants also visibly grow tighter as he trembles to stand, that man is after a part of Vergil waiting to go feral.

⁠He puts your pleasure first before his, and loves eating you out. He eats you like he’s never had a meal before, he loves licking your clit and sucking on your folds with his thick lips.

V loves restraining you using his walking stick, he pulls you closer unexpectedly using it. And sometimes teases your entrance with it by positioning it between your legs when you’re standing next to him.

V likes it when you trace his tattoos after sex, the beads of sweat along with the thick lines of the patterns on his body. It soothes him, as he would subtly place your hand on his flaccid cock leading to a handjob.

V cums a lot, he always pulls out and likes to cum on your chest. He doesn’t want to risk having children, especially with his weak state. He enjoys watching strings of semen land on your breasts and stomach.

Sometimes V would make Griffon scout an area before getting down on his knee to ask you to have sex with him in public. It probably be a park behind a tree where you ride him and he humps you from beneath, to not put stress on his legs.

V loves to suck on your breasts and kiss you during sex. It brings him a sense of intimacy and he gets to be close to you aside from his cock penetrating. 

He can feel very weak and tired after ejaculating. The strenuous activity itself leaves him feeling like he’s fading, so he relies on you to cuddle him and get him up and about again. 

V loves it when you moan his name out loud and in pleasure, it makes him feel remembered knowing he is going to be gone soon and become one with his other half. But even then he reassures you that as Vergil he will never forget you and your memories and will come back.

#v x reader #dmc #dmc 5 #dmc x reader #dmc 5 x reader #vergil dmc #dmc nero #dmc dante #dmc5 #dmc5 x reader #dmc v #dmc5 v #dmc 5 v

[vinvantae]

hi lovey! id love to request a dr one-shot/fic ;)

the reader and him are teammates in f1. and at first they hit it off well, but daniel slowly finds himself being jealous of the reader getting close to the other drivers, especially the paddock playboy (iyk who ;) ) bc he caught feelings for the reader.

the ending is up to you! angst or not, im down for any ending. let your mind run free <3

Of course I can, thank you so much for the request 💜 hopefully this will get me re-inspired to write the final chapter of Baby Steps Cus I’ve hit a wall 🫠

Hooked

Warnings - angst, unrequited pining, reader is a bit of an asshole, Pierre is also an asshole

There’s now a part two! It can be found here

******************************************************

The paddock was bustling with life as the race weekend continued- it was qualifying day and you were eager to get some good laps in. You pulled your race suit up and threw a playful smile to your teammate as he walked past your side of the garage.

You and Daniel had become fast friends when you both joined Mclaren the same year, Andreas the mastermind finding the best teammate on the grid for you after you moved up from F2 as reigning 2-time champ. Not only did you work well on the track together but your friendship was a fan-favourite. What they didn’t realise was that Australian had found himself feeling a little jealous of his track mates.

The way Carlos had you doubling over with laughter, the way Lewis always found a way to be standing with you in group photos and Pierre…

The Alpha Tauri driver’s interactions with you made him want to put his head through a wall. He knew Pierre’s intentions were far from innocent but you were both single, so what could he do? Daniel tried to draw his eyes away but anytime the Frenchman’s hands lingered a little too long or his gaze ran over your body in your unfairly tight fireproofs; Dan could feel his hands balling up into fists.

But he could tell it was something different when it came to Pierre. If anyone else touched you like that then you’d have their head, but when Pierre’s large hand splayed across the small of your back when he ‘had to’ squeeze past, you didn’t even flinch. In fact, Dan was sure he’d caught you blushing.

So the Australian knew it was not only unprofessional to admit how he was feeling, but it was a bad idea. Catching feelings for a fellow driver? His teammate of all people. Could only end badly… right? He had to tell himself that or he was sure he’d do something stupid.

But when your eyes fell on him, your lips curving up into the prettiest smile, his heart skipped a beat. You seemed to seek him out in crowds and your entire posture seemed to shift once you’d spotted your teammate. Going from a little tense, on edge even, to relaxed. He couldn’t mess that up for you. It would be unfair to take your feeling of safety by telling you how much you meant to him. Especially when he was sure your heart was elsewhere.

“Daniel!”

The driver was broken out of his thoughts as you stepped into the garage, helmet tucked underneath your arm. “Hey, y/n, you okay?”

“Starting to think you’ve forgotten about our pre-drive ritual.” You pouted softly, placing your helmet down on one of the desks, pulling a pair of headphones out of your pocket.

He rolled his eyes playfully. “I honestly don’t know why you think this helps.”

“Just does!” Your smile was so charming as you plugged the earphones into your phone and offered him one. “You ready?”

Your eyes bore into his and Daniel could feel his cheeks heating up. There was no way you were oblivious to his crush, the small raise of your eyebrow proved it, but yet you said nothing. The pair of you sat against the wall of his garage, an earphone each.

“Michael picked the song today.”

The ritual was something you’d come up with unintentionally one day after finding Daniel was listening to the same song as you. You would both listen to a song together and whoever could memorise the most lyrics after you got out of the cars won. The older driver never bothered paying attention to the song as it played through - during your time together he’d always let you win. Instead he just took the time to enjoy the private moment with you, one that remained uninterrupted as the garage knew the ritual well.

When your eyes met his, for a brief moment he could’ve sworn they flickered to his lips but then you reached up to touch his face and the world seemed to stop.

“Eyelash.” You hummed, holding it out in front of him. “Make a wish.”

I wish you’d look at me like you look at him.

He blew the eyelash away, but it was almost as if someone out there was trying to stamp out any hope he had because almost as soon as the wish left your fingertip - a thick French accent called your name and your attention was drawn away. You practically scrambled off of the floor.

You brushed your finger under his chin. “See you, Danny.”

As he watched you practically ran to Pierre, the Frenchman’s arm wrapping around you. It pained him to watch but he couldn’t look away - he could almost see your heart skip a beat as Pierre lent in, for a second he thought he was going to kiss you and clearly so did you, but then at the last second he dipped to the side and whispered something in your ear.

Daniel cringed at the sight, even though you had your hook in him - Pierre definitely had his hook deeper in you.

And as his gaze locked with the icy blues of the Frenchman, the latter’s lips curving up into a devilish smirk, he knew there was no way he’d ever win this war.

******************************************************

Oof sorry, hope you enjoyed it though! Thank you for the request. I def need to get back into writing

#daniel ricciardo #f1 fic #f1 x reader #f1 x you #daniel ricciardo x reader #ricciardo x reader #Pierre Gasly #pierre gasly x you #pierre gasly x reader

[artiststarme]

What If Steve Were To Leave Hawkins? Part 20 (Epilogue)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19

The series is finished! Thank you for everyone that read it and stuck with me through the 20 parts, I know it was a lot and ended up being much longer than I anticipated for my first fic. Thank you very much for your kind comments. I plan on posting my next fic sometime in the next couple of days, if you'd like to be tagged in that, let me know!

~*~*~*~

The trio were thriving in Chicago. It had been roughly a month since they had all three moved into a two-bedroom apartment a few blocks from the coffee shop and a little longer than that since they’d all moved away from Hawkins. All three of them were having the time of their lives. 

Steve had been picking up extra hours at the coffee shop with Betty to try and make some extra money. He loved working as a barista and being challenged to make the most asinine of orders. What he loved even more is when he looked up on boring weekday shifts to see Eddie and Robin pouring over their notebooks. Steve could watch them scribble song lyrics and math equations, respectively, all day. And whenever Eddie looked up to meet his eyes with a beaming smile on his face? That was nice too. 

Eddie had accepted a full time job at the record store that they had passed their first day in the city. He could finally work a job he enjoyed without threat of violence from high school jocks or cruel words from middle-aged churchgoers. He’d also joined the band that the cashier, now known as Justin, had invited him to. They sounded way better than the high school Corroded Coffin did and with Eddie’s guitar skills? The new and improved Corroded Coffin was getting more than five drunks whenever they played in the bars. Steve was there at every ‘concert’ and cheered the band, especially Eddie, on after every song. What Eddie especially looked forward to on those nights though wasn’t the full crowd. Oh no, he looked forward to the possessive kisses that Steve would give him once they were away from prying eyes. 

Robin loved Chicago. She had started taking Gen Ed classes at UIC for the fall semester and working at an LGBT+ bookstore on the weekends. While she was currently single after breaking up with Vickie, she was happy. They parted on good terms and they both agreed that long distance at their age wasn’t the answer. Robin spent most of her free time working at the bookstore or making friends at school. However, she also devoted a healthy amount of time to third wheeling Steve and Eddie. It was easy really. Especially since everyone turned into a third wheel around them, whether they knew it or not. Anytime anyone sees them, they’re hanging off of one another, giving each other heart eyes, and being disgustingly lovey-dovey in general. 

~*~*~*~

By far the best part of moving in together in the city for Steve was waking up to Eddie in the morning on their days off. They would lie in bed for hours just talking or kissing or talking and kissing. Today, they were talking about their future in Chicago. 

Steve was watching the sunlight from the windows hit Eddie’s contours and accentuate his messy bedhead. “Are you happy here?”

Eddie closed his eyes and yawned before giving Steve the biggest smile his tired face could muster. “Stevie, baby, I’ve never been happier. I didn’t even know I could be this happy!”

His eyes danced across Steve’s face before his smile widened upon spotting the hickey he had left the night before. “What about you?”

Steve hummed as he thought about his answer. He was still having trouble putting his happiness into words. He felt like he was living within a dream, one that he never wanted to wake up from. He looked back to Eddie, his glorious boyfriend. The man that had shown him what it was like to be cared for by someone and the one who had picked up the broken pieces everyone else had left behind. “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. And I wouldn’t be if it weren’t for you. You make me really fucking happy, Eds. Even if you did eat the last of my Rocky Road cereal last night.”

Eddie’s smile turned into an overexaggerated pout as he fell backwards from his place hovering over Steve’s face onto the pillow. “I said I was sorry! I’ll pick up some more on my way home from work tomorrow. I can’t believe you ended your love confession with that, Jesus fucking Christ.”

Steve laughed and dragged Eddie back over to him, letting his frizzy curls curtain both of them. “I really love you Eddie.”

Eddie pressed a soft kiss to the tip of his nose and whispered, “I really love you too Steve.”

They kissed each other for a couple of minutes before Steve pulled away and nervously licked his bottom lip before speaking, “hey Eds, I’ve been thinking about something.”

Eddie gently shook his head, “I’m flattered, Stevie, but gay marriage isn’t legal yet so-”

“What?”

Eddie’s eyebrows furrowed, “oh, was that not what you were… oh. My bad, carry on.”

Steve shook his head, he’d poke that bear later. He cleared his throat before continuing, “I’ve been thinking… maybe I could go back to school? I know Robin is really enjoying it and if I just went on a part-time basis then I could still afford it. And I know I want to get a degree eventually so maybe I could take some classes and decide what I want. What do you think?”

“I think that’s a great idea! We’ll figure out the money later. If you think going to school and getting your degree will make you happy, I say go for it,” Eddie said, rubbing his hand down Steve’s arm. 

Steve nodded, “I think it would. My parents always pushed me to go into business but I think if I did something I really liked, I would have a really good time.”

“What do you want to do, then? Not thinking about anything else, what would make you happy?” Eddie asked. 

Steve bit his lip. He had an idea but he’d never shared it with anyone else. He knew though that if there was one person who wouldn’t make fun of his interests, it was Eddie. “I want to be an author. If I could, I’d write stories that kids could look up to and be inspired by.”

Eddie smiled and grabbed the back of Steve’s head, dragging him into the most gentle of kisses. “I think that’s a great idea, Stevie. Neither one of us will have some normal, nine to five job. When I’m a famous rockstar and you’re a big, hotshot author on the New York Times Best Sellers list, we can tour together and see the world.”

Steve nodded, that was quite the dream. But it was missing something, one small aspect that wasn’t coming to mind. One thing would make their dream even more perfect. Eddie also seemed to notice and after a thoughtful hum added, “with Robin.” 

Steve’s smile stretched and with a small laugh he agreed, “oh yeah, with Robin. That’s the dream, baby.”

And with that, they kissed.

Updated Taglist: @nickavalens @conversesweetheart @themostunoriginalpersonever @swimmingbirdrunningrock @eddiethegreatteddybear @harrumphingtons @call-me-big-eyes @moonshadows-13 @glittergluekintsugi @cpidcupk @doubleb11 @mentalcyborg @amoris-no-smut-allowed @purple-lemonade @labels-are-for-the-weak @thebrazilianatheist @rajumat @livelaughlexa @5ammi90 @colorful565 @marvelousforlife @chaoticcoffeequeen @gregre369 @suddenlyinlove @thegreatmistake @stillfullofshit @nburkhardt @batxsignalsx @newunknowns @thosemessyvibes @tailsfromthecrypt @luciana-rowan @bird-with-pencils @adaed5 @lolawon @flustratedcas @iwillfindmyneverland @messrs-weasley @skoomy-doompy

@yearningagain @forest-fogg @bitchysunflower @stardust-era @newtstabber @bobatrash-queen @notjasontxdd @ohlook-afrog @00biscuit @grtwdsmwhr @oxidantdreamboat @the-witch-forever-lives @estrellami-1 @whatthemeepever @a-simple-gaywitch @imzadidragonfly @freddykicksasses @krimsonsimp @whatthefuccck @delta-piscium @anaibis @tinynebula @darkwitchoferie @evix-syne666 @tawghasa @pyrohonk @lillys-weird-world @superduckmilkshake @paintsplatteredandimperfect @tiny-enthusiast @whalesharksart @krazyperson @username-i-guess @ilikechocolatemilkh @awkwardgravity1 @romanticdestruction @espressopatronum454 @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit

#would you guys like me to post the snippets of this story that didn't make the Final Cut? #this had so many parts but feels like it went by really quick lol #we love a happy ending #thanks for reading my first fic! I hope you guys liked it #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #steddie #fanfic #stranger things #feel free to ask me questions or send messages!

[tokyokookmin]

MY FAVOURITE JIKOOK VOCALS

I'd like to grab a chance when my new love, Letter is out. This a post dedicated to all of my favourite jikook vocals be it on or off stage. This post will highlight their "two shades of tender in a tug of war". Please be prepared to reminisce about the old jikookery days. Don't say I didn't warn you! Let's get it~~

ALSO! I am not ranking the vocals. What song comes up to my mind first grabs the top spot.

LETTER FT. JUNGKOOK

There's no official MV for this lovely song and won't likely have one as it is meant to be a hidden track. Just putting this lovely cover by Elisssa here. Check it out!

MY UNIVERSE

Like the tweet says, their raw vocals are absolutely beautiful. Their voices hits different, you know? 😭❤️

RUN

Yes, you're hearing it right, it's not that run bts song, but the hyhh era song. My forever favourite song, run. A song that makes me so energetic whenever I feel down. It enlightens me so much. For jikook? Good lord save me! They are wild 😂.

1. Seoul Final 2019

Psst, you saw this coming, didn't you?

Yes yes, you're still hearing me rambling about my favourite moment of 2019 (I say this "favourite moment" thing for everything 😭 I just can't choose!!)

2. BTS HONG KONG 190321

This moment is so underrated. I'll be sure to create a post just for this day and song. Highlighting all the pictures.

STAY GOLD

A beautifully written song by bangtan. Soulful lyrics and heartwarming meaning.

1. BTS STAY GOLD CDTV LIVE

Stay gold outro has got to be one of my favs. Just jikook staring at each other while ending the song. Pure comfort.

2. BTS STAY GOLD LIVE

BAD DECISIONS

A super cool and hip song. Dedicated to the fans. JM's and JK's voice blend in so nicely!

FOR YOUTH

A song which never fails to capture the feelings in my heart. Forever fav. An intimate song released before the hiatus, it depicted our journey together of both army and BTS.

1. BTS FOR YOUTH LIVE COMEBACK

2. BTS FOR YOUTH KBS LIVE COMEBACK

3. BTS FOR YOUTH TMA MUSIC AWARDS

WHO

(LAUV, FT JIMIN AND JUNGKOOK FROM BTS)

"Feeling hypnotized by the words that you say"🎶

A collaboration between Lauv and JIKOOK.

THE TRUTH UNTOLD

TTU is a song that carries a lot of emotions and it's very well executed by BTS. The vocal line surely knows how to change their mood during songs and I applaud them for their professionalism. Ok okay, but I'm still not gonna deny that jk cracked up when Jin didn't hit his note well 😭💜 (my JINKOOK heart)

Do you remember the time where they changed the lyrics from "and I still want you" to "But I still want you" while facing eachother, still not breaking their locked gazes when the lights went out?

SEOUL FINAL 2019

I lost track of the source, if anyone of you knows where it's from, please let me know! For now, enjoy their harmonious vocals!

WE DONT TALK ANYMORE PT.2

Nothing to say. Just embrace their vocals.

LIGHTS

Something about this song makes me feel it's meant for jikook. I'm not saying the lyrics but their body language here is......

RUN BTS

A MASTERPIECE.

HONNE'S "YOU COME TO ME"

Jikook's cover, ya know?

Happy 7 years to this cover~

FILM OUT

I briefly started blogging on this platform around this era. Film out contains a lot of emotions. I love the beat.

BTS SOWOZOO

2. BTS CDTV LIVE

This post was long due and it took me a long time to get all the materials. My drafts got deleted and I got upset. That's why it took a while to be redone, lol. Anyways, please enjoy and support this post since it took a really long time to get it back on track. ENJOYYY~

Sincerely, tokyokookmin.

#Youtube #jikook #koomin #kookminers #kookmin #jkkrs #jkk #mingguk #minkook #jimin bts #jungkook bts #JJK #PJM #JM #JK #jungkook jimin #bts park jimin #bts jeon jungkook

[denim-mixtapes]

Showstopper - The Christmas Special

Pairing: Eddie Munson/Fem!Reader Word Count: 7.1k Summary: It's Christmas break and you're headed to Hawkins to spend it with Eddie, now your boyfriend. Over the first few days of break, you get to meet his uncle Wayne and learn more about his history, and enjoy the holiday so much more than you ever would have if you went to your own family's celebration. You agreed on no presents, but that doesn't mean he can't unwrap you on Christmas Eve. Warnings: NSFW 18+ SMUT, Minors DNI or I’ll put coal in your stocking. Brief mentions of tense family dynamics, VERY brief mentions of death in Eddie's past, Wayne being the best parent around, cute holiday fluff, but then also -- oral (f & m receiving), rough oral sex/face fucking, face sitting, 69 position, VERY very brief mention of anal play in passing like blink and you miss it, a stupid amount of pet names (baby, sweetheart, princess, sweet thing) instead of y/n. I think that covers it but don't hesitate to lemme know if I missed something!

[Part 1] [Part 2] [AO3] -- Part 4 COMING SOON

A/N: Sorry that this took literally forever but also I'm not going to apologize TOO much because I'm trying really hard to not be so hard on myself about deadlines. Anyway, split this into two parts to get it posted quicker, so keep an eye out for the New Year half of the holiday special sometime soon! Thanks for your patience and sticking with me! <;3 <3

The offer for you to stay in Hawkins for Christmas came as naturally to Eddie as the lyrics to his favorite song, he hadn’t even realized it slipped past his lips until you were staring at him incredulously. 

“What?” He asks through a chuckle, fingers stilling where he was once scratching between your shoulder blades, soothing you after a call from home. 

Dropping your head back into your hands with a groan, you reply, “I can’t do that, Eddie.”

His voice is warm, devoid of judgment when he simply asks, “why not? I went to your hometown for Thanksgiving.” 

You can’t help but laugh, sitting up from your hunched position to lean heavily on his shoulder and look at him through your lashes, the slightest pout on your lips. He would deny it if anyone asked him, but he thought the purse of your lips and concern-etched brow only made you that much more endearing. 

“We weren’t actually a couple then, though,” you sigh. With a curious look, he silently urges you to continue, still not seeing the problem you are. “Last I checked, you don’t go home to spend the holidays with your boyfriend’s family after literally less than one month of dating,” you press, “I couldn’t intrude like that, it’s your time with Wayne.” 

“Sweetheart,” he murmurs against your crown, placing a kiss in the very same spot before pulling back to fix you with a hard stare. “You clearly don’t want to go home over the break, and I don’t blame you after seeing how they make you feel first hand. I don’t blame you at all. And I see that old fart every day, Christmas is no different. It wouldn’t be an intrusion, hell, he’s been practically begging me to bring you ‘round so he can meet you,” 

You swear you can feel your chest start to crack open at the thought of Eddie talking about you to his Uncle. It’s a sentiment that might have been obvious or inevitable, but still one that tugs at your heart strings and further deepens the pinch between your brow and the sentimental look on your face. 

“You’re sure?” You ask quietly. 

“Positive.” 

So it was decided. You’ve been officially dating for three weeks and are about to spend your second holiday together. It would be a lie if you said you were surprised, Eddie has never really been one for traditions or societal convention after all.

Robin is thrilled when you tell her, insisting that the both of you make an appearance at her family’s big New Year party, and Steve even makes a point to suggest a few things the four of you (and their gaggle of teenage friends) can do over the course of the week. It seems like everyone is excited that you’ll be spending the Holidays in Hawkins. 

Well, almost everyone. 

“What do you mean you won’t be making it!?” 

You can feel your mother’s rage through the phone, as much as she tries to conceal it. You’re already shaking, twirling the phone cord around your fingers nervously, fidgeting. 

“Exactly what it sounds like,” you sigh, “I won’t be coming home for the holidays, I’ll be spending the break in Indiana with Eddie and his family. It’s only fair, we visited you for Thanksgiving, and considering how well that went, I’m assuming he wouldn’t be welcome back.” The silence on the other line is deafening. “Exactly. So I’ll be going somewhere where we’re both welcome.” 

“Honey you know we would love to have you, I don’t want you to think–”

“The decision has been made, Mom.” 

“Well,” She sputters, trying to find some way to convince you to come…alone. “What do you expect us to do with all your gifts? Return them?” 

“I guess?” You can’t stop the comment from coming out as a laugh. “It’ll save me the trip to the return counter at the mall, myself.” 

She manages to get out half of a scoff before you’re slamming the phone back onto the receiver, hands balling into fists at your sides. 

From her side of the room, Robin shoots you a sympathetic look, closing the textbook she was studying and shuffling to the edge of her bed. “That bad, huh?” 

“I don’t even want to talk about it,” you groan, pinching the bridge of your nose. Desperate for a distraction, you thrust your thumb toward the door. “You still got some shopping to finish up? Want to tag along to the mall?” 

With a signature Robin Buckley toothy smile, she hops off the elevated bed with a thump. “Thought you’d never ask.”

— 

You’ve been at it for hours, traipsing the overcrowded holly jolly halls of a shopping mall during the holiday season, arms weighted down with shopping bags that contained some presents, but mostly gifts for yourselves. Robin is happily slurping on the Icee you’re sharing, while you break off bits of the world’s biggest pretzel and pop them into your mouth. 

All in all, it’s been a successful day. You managed to snag a couple of records that Eddie was having trouble getting his hands on, as well as a new strap and a couple packs of strings for his Warlock. You agreed on no presents, since your relationship was so fresh, but you had the feeling he was going to break the rules just as much as you have, so you somehow keep finding little things here and there to add to the gift. Robin crossed off the last name on her list, her dad, with a fancy bar tool set and a too-expensive bottle of scotch scored with a fake ID. In the same store, you plucked a middle shelf bottle of whiskey from the wall of names, hoping it would make do as a host gift for Wayne. Based on Eddie’s description of the man, you figured it would do just fine, especially when you pair it with a nice insulated flannel. You even managed to sneak away from Robin for just a few minutes to purchase her gift in secret, a book that she picked up and put down several times, debating on if she should buy it for herself or not. You made the decision for her. 

You’ve just fed her a bit of pretzel, causing both of you to burst into a fit of giggles, when she mumbles around the bite, “any other stops?” 

“No, no, I think I’ve spent more than enough money today,” you laugh, steering both of you around a corner and down a corridor that you hope leads back to the parking lot. 

Halfway back to the exit, you pass a Spencer Gifts window display that catches your eye. It’s awful, cheesy as hell, and you’re honestly surprised it’s allowed to be displayed so plainly to the public. Under two neon signs labeled “nice” and “naughty” are two mannequins dressed in scant lingerie. The nice set is Santa themed, all bright red fabric and faux fur trim, with a neat little bow and one jingle bell dangling between the cups. The naughty stops you in your tracks, black, strappy, mesh, downright salacious. 

Robin notices your abrupt stop and follows your line of sight, another laugh bubbling behind her words, “you wanna go in there, don’t you?” 

“I– yes…shut up. I’ll be quick.” 

—

Unlike the drive to your hometown last month, the drive to Hawkins is quick and pleasant. Back seat was loaded down heavily with gifts and a larger suitcase than the last time. You take it a little slower, but the half hour still beats four hours any day. Also unlike last time, you’re making this trip alone. 

Without Eddie there to distract you with conversation, you’re allowed more time for your mind to wander, to race with anxiety. Your fingers tap at the steering wheel, stomach doing flips as you think about the ten days ahead of you. Excitement and nerves battle it out to be your dominant emotion. On one hand, you’re more than excited to get some time with Eddie, uninterrupted by your class schedule or work, looking forward to surprising him with your gifts and seeing him in his natural habitat, meeting his uncle. On the other, you’re scared shitless that with all this access to you, forced to spend ten days in a row together, cooped up in his little hometown…well you’re not worried you'll get tired of each other. You’re convinced you’ll never tire of Eddie Munson. What you’re really worried about is that all that time together could burst the content little bubble you’ve been in, that he might realize you’re not all that exciting at the end of the day. You’re worried he’ll get tired of you. 

Stop. 

You scold yourself for thinking like that as you pull into Forest Hills Trailer Park, gravel crunching under your tires when you roll to a stop in front of the Munson trailer. Gathering as much as you can carry into your arms, you make your way to knock on the door.

When Eddie answers, you’re a sight to behold. Nothing more than a forehead behind a stack of colorfully wrapped boxes, your line of sight obscured by the frilly bow on top of Wayne’s gift. 

“So much for no gifts,” he chides, ducking down to scoop the mess of presents from your grip. Once he’s sure he has a good handle on them, he ducks to kiss your cheek in greeting and then clumsily leads you inside. “Leave the rest,” he urges, “I’ll go get it once I set Santa’s entire workshop under the tree.”

Your cheeks heat at his tease, looking down at your shoes as you mumble, “it isn’t that much.” 

Eddie responds with a hearty laugh, full and genuine, and it blooms more confidence in your chest. When you look up, you see that the ‘tree’ isn’t much more than a string of garland wrapped around a coat rack, but there are handmade and sentimental ornaments strung from it proudly. He dusts off his hands animatedly and turns to you with a proud smile, “I know, I know, but we did say no gifts.” 

The only response you give is a glare toward one of the boxes that was already there, wrapped in butcher paper and labeled with a bold scrawl of your name in permanent marker.

“Only two of those are for you,” you finally say, biting back a laugh at your lie, “okay, three.” 

“Good thing I managed to shove more than one thing in that poorly wrapped box, then.” He makes his way around the pile of gifts and comes to a stop in front of you, finally properly greeting you. With both hands on your cheeks he kisses you fully, an eager, hungry little thing that’s fit to say hello after a few days apart. “Hi.” 

“Hi honey,” you smile into his lips. 

“‘M glad you’re here.” 

—

It’s not until the next morning, the 23rd, that you end up meeting Wayne. 

When you wake, Eddie is still sound asleep and looking at the time you expect him to still be out for at least another hour or so, but the light filtering in through the threadbare curtains is bright enough to rouse you and you know you won’t be able to fall back asleep, so you carefully get out of bed and tiptoe out into the main room of the trailer. 

Once the door is closed tightly behind you in an attempt to muffle any sounds you may make, you begin your search through the cabinets to find coffee and filters. It takes a few moments, but eventually you find them and set the pot to start brewing, perusing the many mugs hanging from the wall while you wait. You pick one blind, a participation trophy from some bowling league in ‘78, and are about to pour yourself a cup when the trailer door rattles open, making you jump. 

Wayne Munson is exactly what you pictured, a tall, tired looking man with sparse salt and pepper hair, white scruff in need of a trim, dressed in work rags and toting a soot stained lunchbox that he drops on the tiny kitchen counter when he enters. His flat features soften as soon as he notices you in the kitchen, his exhaustion melting away into a kind smile. His eyes sparkle just like Eddie’s when he does. 

“Sorry, kiddo,” he says, voice rough with age and a years-long smoking habit. “Didn’t mean to scare you. You must be the girl that’s been taking up all of Ed’s time lately.” He reaches out a hand to shake yours, which you happily accept and offer him your name. Using your handshake as an anchor he pulls you toward him to pat your shoulder affectionately, a kind of half-hug that isn’t much of an embrace. It’s clear he’s a hugger, but realized halfway through that he shouldn’t overstep. Softer now that you’re close, he jokes, “thanks for taking him off my hands.” 

“‘Course,” you laugh, leaning into the charade, “you owe me, though. He’s a handful.” 

“Don’t I know it.”

You point to the coffee pot with raised brows, silently offering him a cup, even though it’s his coffee and you’re in his house.

The man thinks for a long moment, “you know I should be gettin’ to sleep, it’s been a long night…but what the hell. Can’t pass up the opportunity to talk about my nephew with you while he can’t defend himself, right?” 

So you pour him a cup and you chat.

The pair of you spend the better part of an hour talking. He shows an interest in you, asks about school, about what you’re studying and how you and Robin are faring in the dorms and living off of cafeteria food. Eventually the conversation turns toward you and Eddie. Apparently, the boy couldn’t shut up about you, and for quite some time before the infamous Thanksgiving trip. Wayne seemed reluctant to divulge the information, but it came out too easily. You clearly make his kid happy and he just can’t stop himself from asking how he ‘finally locked you down.’ (His words, not yours.) You consider telling him the story you manufactured for your own family, the one about your first date at the Hideout and how you’ve been together for some time now, but there’s signs of life in the bedroom and the door is creaking open.

A slow smile cracks onto your face when you catch sight of Eddie, still soft with sleep and eyes half closed.  

“We’ll have to tell you the full story later,” you say to Wayne, though your gaze is trained only on Eddie. “It’s a wild one.” 

“Yeah, old man, isn’t it past your bedtime?” Eddie jokes from his spot leaning on the counter. Nodding toward the bedroom once more he adds, “c’mon baby, get dressed in something warm, we’ve got plans today.” 

—

“This is stupid, this is fucking stupid, this is so dumb!!”

You’re surrounded by raucous laughter, both of Eddie’s hands clutched tightly in your own as he leads you across the frozen pond on wobbly legs. You’re both giggling, barely even moving, and Robin and Dustin are loudly contributing to the ruckus, their laughter the loudest as she skates circles around you and Dustin trails slowly behind. 

“C’mon, you just gotta trust me,” Eddie insists, unable to hide the jest in his voice. “I won’t let you fall, I swear!” 

For someone so rough around the edges, Eddie is surprisingly nimble on skates. He’s patient with you as you get more sure footing beneath you, leading you around the perimeter of the pond a couple more times. You’re starting to get more confident on your feet when Robin blows by you again, shouting hello to the rest of the teenagers that just arrived, and throws you off your balance, sending you tumbling toward the ground. 

A chill runs up your spine, icy water soaking through your gloves and the seat of your pants when you land with a soft “oof.” Unsure of whether you’re more hurt from the fall or embarrassed that it happened, in the end the only thing that takes over is another weak laugh of disbelief that it happened at all.

“Whoa, hey there–” Eddie comes to a stop in front of you, his own laughter soft and unsure, he wants to make sure you’re okay before fully busting out. You wave off his concern and allow him to help you back up. “How about we take a break from this,” he suggests through his continued fit of giggles, “c’mon.” He leads you slowly over to the small collection of picnic tables, and when you’re firmly in place on one of the benches, tells you to stay put. 

You take in your surroundings as he retreats. It really is a scene ripped right from a Christmas movie. The pond itself is naturally occuring, jagged and lopsided shoreline frozen over in the Indiana winter, but it’s surrounded by food carts and temporary structures. There’s a tent for skate rental, a coffee and cocoa truck surrounded by picnic tables, and even one of the large evergreen trees surrounding the pond is decorated with lights and ornaments for the holiday. It’s bustling with life, small children on wobbly legs (most of them doing better than you had been) lead their parents across the pond happily, a group of carolers walks by serenading you with Joy to the World, and across the way, you spot Robin and Steve with the kids. Steve is play-fighting with one of them you don’t recognize, a feisty redhead giving him a run for his money, as they walk toward you. 

Eddie returns from the skate rental quickly with your shoes tucked under his arm and two festive, steaming paper cups in his hands. Offering you one, he sits on the bench beside you. You take the drink happily, but wrap your hands around his own on the cup so tight that he can’t pull away. 

“What’re you up to, Sweetheart?” He breathes, leaning forward on the bench to kiss your cold nose. You don’t let him go far, chasing his lips for a real kiss, humming contentedly when he doesn’t resist. 

“Nothin’,'' A cheeky smile, another hurried kiss. “Your fingers are freezing. Just tryin’ to keep you warm.” 

“You sure you’re not just trying to hold my hand?” 

You gasp, all drama and playfulness, snatching your cup of cocoa away and leaving his hand hanging in the cold. “I would never.” 

He fixes you with an honest-to-God pout and there’s something on the tip of the tongue when he’s cut off with a shout from the group. 

“Quit making eyes at your girl, Munson!” Dustin shouts, hurling a snowball your way. It misses, narrowly, and lands with a splat on the plastic covered picnic table. “Come on!” 

Eddie’s nose wrinkles in the way that it does when he’s trying to force down a smile, and he leans in toward you to knock your forehead with his own. “My girl,” he mumbles, his voice thick and warm with emotion. 

It’s not the first time he or anyone has referred to you as such, but that doesn’t stop it from making your heart race anyway. Any time Eddie refers to you as his has you grinning from ear to ear.

“Go on,” you urge, then kiss the apple of his cheek affectionately. “Go have fun, I’ll hang out here where I’m not a danger to myself.” 

It’s with another dramatic, smacking kiss that he makes his exit, skating away with a little too much finesse – even for him. You watch him circle his younger friends, taunting them with a wide smile and a boisterous laugh. He tugs on the girl’s braid, lunging away with exaggerated fear when she reaches for him in retaliation, throws handfuls of loose snow at Mike and Dustin, cowers behind Steve when they try to get him back. He’s happy here, in his element, and it starts to make a little more sense how he got on so well with your younger cousins back at Thanksgiving. 

You’re so enraptured watching him gently bully his friends that you don’t notice Robin joining you on the bench until she speaks up. 

“I like this look on you.” She hums, a shit-eating smirk on her usually delicate face, “it suits you.” 

In the distance, Eddie has wrestled Dustin off the pond, the two of them squabbling in the snow banks surrounding it. The sight of his joyous smile warms you from the inside out, your chest tingling with it when you try to hide your smile behind another sip of your cocoa. “What look is that?” You finally snark back, reaching out a hand to wiggle your pink-tipped fingers sarcastically, “the Michelin Man coat? Or the frostbite from wet gloves?” 

“No,” bumping your shoulder with hers, she just grins. “Happy.” 

Shoving at her, you hope that the bite of the cold outside has turned your cheeks red enough already, hiding your furious blush at her comment. “Shut up.” 

Denying it is easy, trying to save face in front of your friend’s blatant told-you-so face, but she’s right. You’re happy.

So happy it wells up in your chest and eeks out your tear ducts. Luckily this time you can blame it on the cold as you round everyone up to head back to the warmth of the trailer. 

—

You wake on Christmas Eve to warm lips caressing your forehead and the weight of Eddie’s palm on your hip. You grumble, curling further into his embrace to shield your eyes from the light filtering in the curtain, pressing your face into the crook of his neck. His arms wrap tighter around you, pulling you snug against him. 

“C’mon baby,” he murmurs into your hair. “Wayne’s home, we gotta do Christmas.” 

Furrowing your brows in confusion, you pull away from his embrace to fix him with a confused stare. “Did I sleep through the whole 24th?” 

His responding chuckle is thick and fond, lashes kissing with the force of his smile, and he shakes his head. “No, sweetheart, but we do celebrate early in this house.” 

You hum thoughtfully in response, cuddling further into his hold, nosing sleepily at his collarbone and pressing soft kisses to the skin there. “Jus’ wanna stay in bed,” you mumble, breath damp against his skin, eyes drooping. 

Eddie’s hand trails up and down the side of your waist, bunching up your sleep shirt in its wake, fingertips leaving a trail of goosebumps behind them, squeezing at the round of your hip before making its way back up. “Suppose we could stay a little while longer.” 

Both of you are quiet for a few moments, the only sounds in the room are your slow, even breaths and the tick of a clock on the wall. Eddie starts to think you may have fallen asleep again when you ask, “why Christmas Eve?” It’s soft, devoid of judgment and keenly curious. Just another question you ask solely for the purpose of learning about him, and the sound of it makes him giddy. 

His fingers brush through your hair gently, pushing a lock of it away from your face and behind your ear before he answers. “It’s just always been that way, I guess,” he huffs, shuffling down the bed so that you’re face to face, eyes heavy with sleep and the weight of the memories he’s about to share. “Ever since my old man got locked up, my mom and I came here for Christmas Eve, back then Wayne worked at a job that didn’t close for Christmas, and he always took advantage of the double time on Christmas Day. But we had to celebrate together somehow, she always said Christmas was for families and that Wayne was the best we had. Didn’t know how true that was till we lost her.” His voice tightens as he recounts the tale, and you want to tell him he doesn’t have to share, not if it’s hard, but he pushes on so you choose to soothe him instead. With a hand on his cheek, you lean up to kiss the wrinkle that’s deepening between his brows, hoping that all his worries go with it when it flattens away. Still, his eyes shine with the hint of tears as he continues, despite the soft smile that your act evokes. “When I came to live with him, he said it didn’t feel right to change the tradition, so it just kinda…stuck. So now our Christmas morning is on the 24th when he gets home from work. It’s a little odd but it’s what we know, I dunno…I guess it’s kind of stupid.” 

“Never!” You scold. Your angry brow and harsh tone is a dizzying contrast to the gentle caress of your thumb against the soft skin of his cheek, and he revels in the comfort, letting his eyes drift shut and leaning into your touch. “It’s not stupid at all, it’s a part of your story, a part of you.” You wait for him to look at you again before you tack on a soft, “thank you for sharing it with me.” 

The peace that takes over his face is the best gift you could ask for. 

Eventually, Wayne comes knocking, saying you have to get the show on the road before he falls asleep after such a long night. You and Eddie join him in the living room, still dressed in sleep clothes and messy hair, Wayne still in his greasy coveralls and work boots. With fresh cups of coffee, he passes around a flask of brandy while Eddie distributes presents and winks when you nervously accept Wayne’s offer. 

It’s refreshing, getting to spend this holiday in such a comfortable, relaxed state. All smiles and laughs, warmth, memories being made. Spending time with the Munsons makes your family holidays feel sterile in comparison, everyone dressed in church clothes, gift giving for the sake of showing off. You can’t remember the last Christmas that you enjoyed being at, but this beats it by far. Eddie’s hand seldom leaves you, always touching, always seeking contact with the swell of your thigh or the small of your back. Even when opening his gifts, he shifted closer to you on the couch so that your shoulders were touching. 

He glares at you each time he opens one of yours, his upturned lips betraying the false anger he’s trying to portray, following each present with sarcastic commentary about how nice of a gift it might have been if you agreed to give gifts. He also follows each one with a quick stolen kiss and a quiet word of thanks murmured so only you can hear. 

You spend the day just like that. Laughing in the living room, cheeks warm from the liquor and from your boyfriend’s flattery, passing around snacks and a polaroid instant camera wasting too much film. Eventually sleep comes for Wayne while you’re watching It’s a Wonderful Life, and you and Eddie sneak away to the bedroom to give him some privacy. 

Later, long after the excitement died down and Wayne had gone to work, you’re sitting on opposite sides of the couch with your feet tucked up under Eddie’s thighs for warmth. He has one hand resting on your calf, thumb distractedly stroking at the soft flannel of your pajama pants, the other holds open a well-loved and worn book that he hasn’t glanced at in about an hour. The trailer is quiet except for Black Christmas playing low on the TV and the sounds of traffic on the main road. You wiggle your toes to get his attention, but only offer a cheeky smile when he looks up at you. 

 “What’s that look for?” He asks, dog-earing the book and tossing it to the floor. His own expression mirrors yours, playful, knowing. 

“You have one more present to unwrap, I was waiting ‘till it got later to give it to you.” 

“Oh really?” He asks, lips stretching taut in a sinister smile. He can tell you’re up to no good, he can hear it in the honey of your voice, feel it in the warmth of your gaze. Making a point to look around, playing dumb as he searches the open room, he turns back to you and ducks his head ever so slightly to fix you with a dark stare. “I don’t see anything else. Where might this last present be?” 

Turning on the couch to stand up, you reach into the pile of torn wrapping paper on the floor that has yet to be cleaned up and produce a discarded sticky bow, placing it on the top of your head. Biting your lip, you can’t stop the mischievous giggle that follows as the boy’s eyes widen infinitesimally and you start to make your way to his bedroom.  

He crosses the room quickly, catching up to you as soon as you cross the threshold and wrapping you up in his arms from behind, his chin hooked over your shoulder. “Fuck all the other shit,” he mumbles against your skin between sloppy, eager presses of his lips, “this is the only gift I need.” 

You lean into his embrace with a soft, pleased sound and grab at the hands around your waist until they loosen just enough for you to turn and face him. 

“How do you know?” You tease, toying with the stretched out collar of his tee shirt, teasing at the skin just below it. “You haven’t even unwrapped it yet.” 

“Sweetheart,” he breathes, words hushed against the column of your throat, “if you wanted me to undress you so badly all you had to do was ask.” His fingers are cold against your hips when he pulls at the hem of your shirt, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. The sight of what’s underneath stops him in his tracks, stepping back to admire you. He scrubs a hand through his hair, scrunching it in his fist as he takes in the sight, chincy red lace and faux fur trim, black straps and bows tying it all together. Your pants sit low on your hips, revealing just enough of the matching panties. There’s a groan deep in his chest, a low, rumbling sound that he tries to swallow, but fails. Reaching out, his hold lands in the dip of your waist, smoothing it’s way up your ribs to stroke his thumb against one perking nipple. You shudder at the action, at the sheer size of his hand covering your breast, lip bitten and arms tucked behind you in anticipation. “You buy this just for me?” 

“Depends,” you simper, reaching out for his chest, stroking broadly up the wrinkled fabric of his shirt, up and around the collar to twirl your fingers in the hair at his nape. With a bitten lip and coy smile, you ask, “have you been naughty or nice?” 

His eyes darken as you walk him the rest of the way to his bed, his breath ragged in anticipation. When his knees hit the mattress, knocking him back into a seated position, he swallows thickly and looks up at you – wide, wanting eyes, an excitement shining in them that sends heat straight to your core. His voice is unbelievably low, gravely when he admits, “now we both know you already know the answer to that.” He smirks and leans back on his palms, spreading his legs even further with the action, the tent in his pants even more obvious. “Do I get to see the rest?”

Nibbling on the inside of your lip, you break into a wider smile and push at the elastic waist of your pants, turning and bending at the waist dramatically if only to savor the sharp breath that comes from your boyfriend when he catches a glimpse of the last surprise you’re hiding – the open crotch of the panties. Eddie swears behind you and you can’t help but let out a mischievous giggle before turning back to him. He’s basking in the sight in front of him, skin flushed, dropped to his elbows for a better view, hands balled into fists at his sides to stop himself from reaching out and touching. Your heart pounds, salivating as you sink to your knees between his spread legs. You don’t think you’ll ever get over this feeling, the sheer excitement, anticipation of being with Eddie, no matter how many times it’s happened before. The sight of his cock tenting his soft sleep pants makes you lick your lips, eager to taste him, to feel his weight heavy on your tongue. 

Running your hands up and down his thighs, closer, closer, closer to where he wants to feel you most before backing away with a sly smile, you can feel the muscles tensing beneath your palms. The air around you is hot, sticky with anticipation as you lick your lips and finally reach for his clothed erection, stroking, squeezing gently, savoring the satisfied groan that the action draws from him. 

“Y’look so pretty like this,” you breathe, dipping your hand into his waistband to take his cock in your hand and give an experimental pump. You’re not so certain that most guys would enjoy being called pretty at all, let alone in this position, but god it’s true. The overhead light shines through his hair like a halo and the way his eyes shine down at you, deep chocolate and honey and want swirling together, perfect plush lips parted just slightly around another soft, pleased sound…he really is a sight. If the comment offends, he doesn’t let on. In fact you’re certain you can see him flush even further at your words, a pretty pink dusting across his porcelain features, you’ll never get enough. Tugging on the waist of his pants with your free hand, you rid him of them, stroking the length of him all the while. One of his hands flies to your hair, bunching in it possessively as you lean in to suckle on just the tip and run your tongue along the slit, moaning at the taste as you collect the drop of precum you find there on your tongue. Releasing him with a satisfied hum and a teasing kitten lick at the ridge of his cockhead, you grin again, sighing dreamily, “been thinking of this all afternoon, y’know.” 

“Yeah?” He grunts, twisting your hair thoughtlessly, wrapping the bulk of it around his hand and tugging, the sting of it drawing a whimper from deep within your chest. “‘S that why you’ve been so distracted? Been daydreaming about sucking me off?”

You don’t respond verbally, just give a coy little nod before licking a deliberate path along the vein on the underside, following with broad, wet, open-mouthed kisses up and down each side of his shaft. You try to get him as messy as possible, wet from every angle with your tongue before taking him as deep into your mouth as you can. 

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he huffs, hips stuttering up off the bed briefly, forcing himself further into your throat and shit if he didn’t love the little choking noise it drew from you. You breathe deep through your nose, swallowing back your gag reflex until your nose presses against his pelvis, tickled by the hem of his shirt. He holds you there for a moment before using your hair as an anchor to pull you off his dick. He releases you, hand falling from the back of your head to stroke your throat, featherlight touches of his fingertips against your windpipe as you heave in a breath, licking your bottom lip. “Where’ve you been hiding this talent, huh?” 

It’s your turn to blush, suddenly shy as if his cock wasn’t just buried to the hilt in your throat. Still you reach out to continue to stroke him as you answer, “I’ve been practicing.” 

Your admission punches the air from his lungs with a wrecked sound, his eyes blown wide and darkening even further as you lean in to take him back into your mouth. He mumbles praise as you work at a steady, almost teasing pace, tells you how pretty you look with your mouth full around another deep, longing moan. As much as he enjoys the sight in front of him, he can’t help but let his mind wander. 

I’ve been practicing. 

He pictures you alone in your dorm, eyes fluttered shut, concentration and a little bit of pleasure set in your brow as you toy with your clit, two fingers of your other hand stuffed in your mouth, training your gag reflex. Did it turn you on, choking and gagging on your own fingers? Did you imagine they were his, or even his cock? Did you stop with just your fingers? You’d admitted to having toys before, and ain’t that another intriguing thought. Fuck. His touch remains on your throat, never constricting, never controlling, but he can feel himself in your throat as you take him all the way to the hilt again and it’s maddening. 

You’re lost in how vocal he is, every moan and groan and swear going straight to your neglected core, and you can’t take it any more. You reach one hand below you to swipe your fingers through your dripping folds, whimpering around Eddie’s cock at the relief when you circle your clit. Not too much, not yet. Just something to take the edge off, but then you pull back to catch a breath and the combination of your absence and the touch-starved whine you let out breaks Eddie from his daydream. 

“Aw, baby,” he croons, stroking your cheek much too gently for the position you’re in. His tone is a little teasing, pitying, but his smile is bright as the sun. “It’s turning you on so much just sucking my cock that you gotta play with that pretty pussy while you do? Gimme your hand.” He holds out his hand expectantly, and you’re torn. You only just got some sweet relief from your pent up tension, only just parted your lower lips to tease two fingers at your entrance and you don’t want to stop now, but he’s looking at you expectantly and you can’t deny him. As soon as you withdraw your fingers from your cunt and hold out your hand, he’s gripping your wrist and guiding those same fingers into his mouth with a groan. He licks you clean, tongue swirling around your digits greedily until he can no longer taste your juices on your fingers and then gives your arm a gentle tug, prompting you to stand up. He sheds his shirt quickly and scoots up the bed, a shit eating grin on his face. “C’mere, I got a solution.” 

Though you roll your eyes at his phrasing, you’re more than eager to comply when he settles back into the mattress and beckons you toward him. Crawling up the bed, you lean forward on your elbows to drop a chaste kiss on his lips before turning around to swing a leg over his shoulder, hovering over his mouth, and this is new. He’s eaten you out plenty of times before, and this isn’t even the first time you’ve sat on his face, but this angle? This angle is something new entirely. He wraps his arms around your thighs to pull you down onto his mouth fully, angling your hips into a more comfortable position before he dives in eagerly. His lazy stubble drags rough against the insides of your thighs, fingers press bruising marks into the meat of them, and as he laps at your bundle of nerves, the tip of his nose teases at your entrance from the angle. 

Not one to be outdone, you lay across his stomach, hips still pressing back against his tongue, and take his cock back into your mouth. You share a unison groan, the vibrations from his voice sending a shockwave through your core, but you’re quick to retaliate by taking him deep in your throat again. You work his shaft at a steady pace, quicker now, and he fucks his tongue into you rapidly, the thick muscle stroking your inner walls in a maddening way. You can feel everything from this new angle. As his tongue works at your weeping hole, his chin bumps your clit erratically, and as you grind back into his efforts you can even feel the point of his nose nudging lightly at your asshole, the new sensation enough to make you clench your walls desperately. 

He stops making out with your cunt briefly, pulling back just enough for his lips to brush against your folds as sings your praises, “Jesus Christ, sweet thing…takin’ me so well. Fuck, just like that,” his voice is strained, sounds just about as desperate as you feel, and he interrupts himself with a choked sound when you gag around his length once more.

It’s a blur from there, a mess of wanton cries and stuttering of hips. Too much sensation, the ever growing tension in your stomach, you’re lost in the feeling of his mouth on your cunt and you stop moving to let him fuck up into your mouth on his own accord, until he’s burying himself deep in your throat and coming. Hot, thick ropes of cum burst in your throat and you swallow as much as you can with a heady moan. The loud, animalistic shout that he releases as he comes triggers your own release, vibrating against your clit deliciously, spreading through your abdomen and down your shaky legs. Eddie continues lapping at your folds hungrily, working you through your aftershocks, holding you in place against him with a firm grip on your thighs until you’re gasping at the overstimulation and twitching away from his ministrations. 

With one last affectionate squeeze to your plush hips, he chuckles in good humor and helps lift you off of his face. “Damn, baby,” he sighs as you slot yourself into his side and tangle your legs with his own. A soft, dopey smile takes over his face, eyelids heavy and head resting back against his headboard, and he kisses you again, deep and slow and reaching into your very existence. It’s a kiss that you can feel everywhere, your toes curl, scalp tingles, and there’s something deep in your stomach tugging you close, closer, you need to be closer. You can taste yourselves on each other’s tongues and the thought of it has you whimpering into his mouth again. He breaks the kiss with another dark laugh, nudging the tip of his nose to yours, back and forth as he catches his breath. “Merry Christmas, Princess.” 

Your voice is ripe with affection when you kiss the height of his cheekbone and reply, “Merry Christmas, Eddie.”

#eddie munson x you #eddie munson/you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson/reader #eddie munson fic #eddie munson smut #stranger things imagine #stranger things x reader #stranger things reader insert #fem!reader #female!reader

[wooahaes]

under the sun [woozi]

pairing: non-idol!woozi x gn!reader

prompt: darl+ing inspired fic.

word count: 9.3k~

warnings: food mention. jihoon being a little standoffish at first and cold to reader a few times. happy ending. also warning for song lyrics written in italics since music is a huge part of jihoon’s fic. also bare minimum proofreading rn, sorry!!

daisy’s notes: my man... i learned while writing this that he apparently is 5′5″ and not 5′4″ like i thought. when will the lies stop. man might be a half inch taller than me. im crying /j

summary: It all starts when you wake up in a field without a name or any memories to define yourself with. Thirteen men take you in as one of their own, and slowly you begin to wonder what is going on within this world... and between you and one of them.

< day 3 || masterlist  || 

[also: i removed a few people from the taglist who hadn’t engaged with seokmin’s part. if you’d like to be added back (or added to the taglist in general), please send in an ask!]

Jihoon was someone who always took time to warm up to people. Everyone knew this (except for you, he thought, unless someone told you--he wouldn’t blame them if they did), Jihoon knew this, and he knew that there was likely little chance for him to budge easily on things like this. He was protective of the group, after all. Even when Chan came, a month before you did, Jihoon grew more used to him. He felt comfortable sharing his music (something Jihoon always held tight to his chest and only shared occasionally) with Chan, with Hansol who seemed to understand him on a different level than the others. Everyone respected his boundaries, and that did include you. He remembered the way you wanted to back out when he was singing to Seungkwan. Even though both he and Hansol were younger, he understood why they both (lightly) scolded him for putting things away when you were around. He knew that he was likely hurting you by being so... exclusive toward you. If he didn’t try to be kinder to you, then you’d grow to hate him. And then you’d leave, wouldn’t you? If you thought he (and anyone else) hated you?

Yet all of those thoughts went straight out the window when he saw you pick up one of his notebooks to move it aside--only panicking when you started to open it.

“Don’t touch that!” His voice was too sharp. The others had looked up--Jun, Soonyoung, and Wonwoo were all on cleaning duty alongside the two of you--to watch for a moment as you froze. Jihoon snatched the book from your grasp, taking a step back.

Jihoon could see the disappointment on Soonyoung’s face, and the concern on Jun’s. Unlike him and Wonwoo, neither of them were great at masking their emotions. And Jihoon realized that, protective as he is over his music, there was no clear way to say it kindly to you.

“I don’t trust you enough yet,” he said, holding his notebook closer to his chest. The words clearly stung, and he could see that. “My music’s personal to me.”

Yet despite the wavering light in your eyes and the way he swore he saw your lip tremble for a second, you forced a smile. “I’m sorry,” you took the tiniest step back. “I just wanted to make sure it was yours. I understand, though.”

Most likely, you were telling the truth. His music books were spiral-bound notebooks that were unlabeled. He would label them later just to be sure--but everyone else knew that these were his because he always kept them in that one spot. Jihoon heard Wonwoo call out your name, asking for you to come help him clean off one of the shelves. You hesitated for a moment before leaving Jihoon to stand there, notebook in his hands, and the broken pieces of a potential relationship shattered around him. 

You were hurt. Jihoon, as dramatic as he felt it was, felt like he’d never get on good terms with you--not fully. After the first time, there was that glimmer of hope because you had stayed. Mingyu said that you thought his voice was beautiful (and adding on a teasing “they think you’re beautiful, too,” that felt like a complete lie), that you appreciated his music.

Jihoon trusted you. Just... not enough. You claimed to understand, but did you? Should he really be so secretive when it’s just the fourteen of you against the world now? While Jihoon still had his boundaries, it felt like many of them had fallen a little, just enough to trust those he lived with. He would always trust some more than others (Seungcheol and Soonyoung, for one, because he respected their work ethic being on the same level as his own--it truly felt like they were leaders in a sense at times), but... he trusted people. He trusted you. He doubted you felt the same way.

Yet... At dinner that night, he watched you steal a glance at him. Most nights, Jun slid his own serving of white rice to Jihoon--knowing that he loved it. Yet, for some reason, he didn’t. It was rare for you to sit next to him, but Soonyoung wanted you there. He’d been making you laugh with some story Jihoon wasn’t really paying attention to (he was sure he heard it before), and when he turned away to respond to something Seokmin had said, you pushed your bowl over to Jihoon.

“You can have it,” you said in a quiet voice, just to keep it between the two of you. A week after you came, and you... already noticed little things like Jihoon’s love of white rice.

He gave you a cautious look. “Are you sure?”

You nodded. “Chan and I were snacking earlier. I’m not that hungry.” You pushed it a little closer to him. “I mean it. You can have it if you want it, Jihoon.”

He thanked you, voice gentler than you’d ever heard it (aside from the time he sang, you noticed--sometimes his singing voice was so pretty and soft...) as he accepted the bowl.

(Neither of you would notice the way Seungcheol had been watching, because Seungcheol always kept an eye on you. You were new, and Soonyoung had offhandedly mentioned Jihoon snapping at you. He had reason to worry about you feeling less comfortable.)

That night, Jihoon curled up back to back with Mingyu. You were warm and snug in Soonyoung’s arms, Chan curled up close on your other side--and Jihoon was fully aware of the sound of your breathing until he finally drifted off, like his mind wouldn’t let go of you as its topic of the day. He dreamed that night of a studio that felt like a second home, and he almost thought it cozier than the one had made with the others.

Almost.

The next three days were left with nothing. Jihoon spent day after day unable to write, no words coming to him as easily as they should be. Music was like second nature to him, like something he knew, and yet... He sat there, staring at his notebook day after day with nothing but a building frustration and half-written lyrics in front of him. What changed? He’d been fine before. Yet three days ago, something happened and it made whatever creative juices inside of him dry up completely. The attempt to play his guitar, to get things out that way, end in frustrated groans because no notes sound right together anymore. Even the songs he’d tried writing before sounded wrong despite the fact that Jihoon knew they were right.

It was frustrating. Impossible, even, to live like this. It made him fidget more, more irritable, more likely to snap a little at people when they teased him a little too much. Every moment is met with his quiet apology before he went to sit by himself, to try and figure out what was wrong.

That wasn’t to say Jihoon only worked on his music. He did chores, yes, but he would join in on games and cooking and exploring with the others whenever the time came. He just always found time to play the guitar before dinner, just to have some moments alone.

“Maybe a change in scenery will help,” Soonyoung said as he watched his friend thumb through pages again, as if trying another song would work. “You always work in here.”

Maybe it would.

Jihoon let himself be led by the hand out of the church and down to the river. Soonyoung had called back to Seokmin that they’d go exploring for a bit, maybe see if they can find some sort of inspiration somewhere (Jihoon doubted it, but Seokmin seemed happy enough that he was getting out again rather than staying cooped up).

“Did something change?” Soonyoung said, hands shoved into his pants pockets. “Maybe you’re having a bad week. You should take a break and focus on other things.”

“I can’t.” If he stopped working on his music, he’d drift a little too far from reclaiming himself. His music made him feel like he was getting closer. To what, exactly, he couldn’t be sure, but he was getting closer to something.

Soonyoung let out a sigh. “We know it’s important to you, but you’re important to us.”

Jihoon thought of you. He couldn’t be important to you, after all: you hadn’t been there long. He couldn’t be someone important to you. You weren’t someone important to him yet, either.

“You should rest if you need to,” Soonyoung said.

“Would you?”

Soonyoung said nothing, lips pressed together. He instead told him a minute later that he would be there for him if he needed him: that everyone would be there for him. Seokmin said the same after dinner before Jihoon went to try one more time to work on something, to write one lyric down. He turned down the offer to talk with a quiet thanks, saying he’d consider it if he needed it.

Then Seungcheol found him staring at his notebook, brows knit together in frustration, and Jihoon decided he felt safe.

“If I can’t find out who I am, I’m letting everyone else down.” He was careful not to grip the notebooks too tightly, but the paper buckled underneath his grip. “Everyone said the songs feel familiar, Cheol. Maybe this will help us remember.”

“No one’s going to be upset if you’re going through a creative block,” Seungcheol said. “We want you to be happy. If working on your music is stressing you out, maybe you should take a short break before you burn out.”

“I’m not going to burn out--” Jihoon almost snapped at him, only to take a deep breath. “I like working on this. It’s comforting.”

“When did it start?”

Jihoon stared down at the paper. When did it start, exact...? “A few days after Chan’s celebration,” he said. “I was able to write at first, it was just... harder. Then it just stopped.”

Seungcheol knew that you were lingering outside of the room, and he already felt an ache in his chest. Days after you arrived. He knew you’d made that connection, too, and he kept that held close to his chest.

“You’ve written a lot ever since you came here,” Seungcheol said instead. “You should rest soon.”

Jihoon promised he would, turning back to his work. Seungcheol sighed, leaving him alone, but stopping just a few steps away from the entryway. He spoke quietly enough, calling out your name.

He watched you step out from the entryway to the main room. “Cheol...”

“It isn’t your fault,” he told you outright. He made his way over, pulling you into his arms. “Okay? Don’t think for a minute that it is.”

He knew that it wouldn’t work. That you’d blame yourself even without his attempt to soothe you. Seungcheol pressed a kiss onto the top of your head instead, hoping that it’d remind you that you were loved.

“Just give him time,” Seungcheol said. “Okay? He’s just going through a creative block. It happens. Soonyoung struggles with choreography from time to time.”

You looked past Seungcheol, toward where Jihoon was likely still sitting inside and stewing in his frustration. “I know,” you said, and Seungcheol could practically see those gears turning.

“Let’s get ready for bed,” he said, turning you away. “Okay? Jihoon will be there soon. Let’s let him work.”

Yet he knew that you had already committed to it. If it was your fault, then you’d find new inspiration for Jihoon. Nothing could change your mind when you were set on helping him.

Jihoon went off by himself most days before dinner: you knew this as a fact. He wasn’t the only one with the tendency for alone time. Minghao would go off and meditate, Seungkwan took walks alone, Jeonghan hid away for an afternoon nap; even you liked a little peace for yourself. Living with thirteen people was stressful, after all. No one could blame anyone for finding a quiet place to sit and decompress before coming together again for dinner.

All of this to say, it took you a little time to find Jihoon. You found him curled up in one of the open spaces off of one corridor, walls painted in bright colors—everything entirely abstract. When you tried to find something in it, all you could see were vaguely sun-shaped blobs here and there. Jihoon sat with his back against the wall, staring intensely at his notebook. Some days you’d see him with the others, but you were a little thankful that he was alone. It made approaching him a little easier.

“Jihoon?”

He jolted at the sound of your voice, pencil dropping into his lap from where he’d been spinning it with his fingers. He waved you off the moment you went to apologize. “Mouse.” He paused, looking up at you. “Did Cheol need something?”

There was an unwelcome edge to his voice and it made you falter. You shook your head. “I was just looking for you.”

“Sorry,” he pulled his notebook closer to his lap. “I was trying to concentrate. So I hid out here.”

You frowned, toying with your sleeve nervously. “Did you write something?”

“No.”

The blunt tone nearly made you wince. He didn’t want you there, you were almost positive. “Oh.” You crouched down. “Maybe we could go for a walk together—”

“I’m fine.” He paused, staring at your face for a moment. “Thank you,” he tacked on a second later, as if it’d soften the blow.

Truthfully, it didn’t. You stood up. “Okay,” you said, taking a step back. “I get it. Sorry for bothering you, Jihoon.”

Then you turned, setting off to go find Chan. hHe’d cheer you up without question if you asked him to. You made your way into the main room, finding him sitting with Soonyoung.

You didn’t notice the way Seungcheol had watched you, already knowing what happened. He always thought you wore your emotions plain as day, masked only slightly by a smile that wouldn’t reach your eyes no matter how hard you tried. It was his job to keep things harmonious, and he frowned as he watched you approach Chan. You asked something about a walk, Chan gave you an apologetic look before admitting he was tired from cleaning with the others, and you waved him off before he could get up. You’d just take your walk alone instead.

Seungcheol debated going after you. He instead waited a moment, watching back at the hallway you emerged from. Sure enough, Jihoon came to the entrance, looking around. He stopped, looking over at where Chan was sitting, furrowing his brows.

He was looking for you in a crowded room of men waiting for dinner to get finished. Seungcheol glanced over to where Mingyu and Joshua were working.

“Jihoon?” Seungcheol called over his shoulder, turning to face him. “Can you go find Mouse?”

Jihoon looked off toward the way up to the church, uncertainty clear in his eyes. That was what Jihoon had meant to do, wasn’t it? Find you? You had looked upset, and Seungcheol could easily connect the dots considering he knew that you and Jihoon weren’t close. He knew that Jihoon snapped at you, too, for moving one of his music books (when he asked you about it, you said you were just making sure it was his--that you wouldn’t have looked further, and he believed you).

“They said they were going for a walk alone,” Seungcheol had entered the kitchen, looking for some way to help out. “You should check around the river. Chan said they like to walk by the river sometimes.”

Jihoon wasn’t the kind of person who would outwardly refuse such a simple request without good reason. He nodded, saying he’d be back in a few minutes as he made his way outside. Jihoon, however, wasn’t stupid either: Seungcheol knew. He had to know, didn’t he? Maybe you told him that Jihoon was making you feel unwelcome. Seungcheol would talk to him soon if you did, at least. Or maybe this was Seungcheol’s way of dealing with it: a subtle push for Jihoon to find you, to talk to you. A chance to apologize, too, if he wanted to take it.

Sure enough, you were sitting by the river, just watching the way the water ran past. The sunset painted your skin with its hues, and Jihoon felt something well up in his throat. Regret? You just looked so sad, so lost, so distant: was that the way he looked when he first came, too? When he felt included but like something big was missing? Before the others found things he could use to write music, before they found a guitar that he had to fix and tune. He remembered those days too well, and even now they sometimes made him feel sick to his stomach. It’s an ugly feeling, and not one he embraced with open arms.

“Hey.” He called out, and you looked up. “It’s almost time for dinner.”

You nodded, looking back at the river. “I’ll be there soon.”

Give them space rang out in the back of his mind. Instead, he slowly approached before sitting down next to you. All the words he wanted to say seemed to disappear.

So he went with what he needed to say, instead. “I’m sorry I’ve been treating you badly.”

You looked up, clearly caught off guard. “What?”

“For snapping at you and for being cold.” He hugged his knees, staring down at the water. “It’s pushing you away and you deserve to be treated better.”

You shook your head. “It’s okay,” you said. “You don’t need to apologize. I understand.” He watched you tug up grass from the ground, no longer meeting his eyes. “It has to be hard getting used to a new person.”

“It is, but that’s not an excuse.” He said, guilt rising in his stomach. Of course you were kind of understanding. He’d seen the way you kindly treated Minghao ever since you came, understanding that he was quieter. He knew that Minghao was growing warmer toward you, too. He was just...

He didn’t know why he was so afraid to get close to you. You were just another person in the group. No one else had left before, so it wasn’t like he could cite some dramatic heartbreak as his reason. He just felt... weird when you were around. Not good, but not bad in the slightest. Just this strange off feeling that wouldn’t fully leave him.

“Jihoon?” You said after a moment. “Is it my fault?”

He furrowed his brow, staring at you. “Is what your fault?”

“That you can’t write music anymore.” You hugged yourself tight, frowning. “I heard what you told Cheol. That... You stopped being able to work after I came. So it’s my fault, right?”

Something about the quiet way you said it, like it was a fact, broke his heart.

“Would it be better if I left?” You didn’t meet his eyes. You just stared ahead, hugging yourself tight--as if you would break if you let go for too long. “I know your music means a lot to you--and to everyone else here, too. I heard Hansol say that it was like he was getting closer to remembering when he heard it. You’re really, really talented, and... and I don’t want to be the reason you lost something so personal to you--”

“I’d rather lose my music than force you to be alone in the world,” Jihoon cut you off there. A heavy pit weighed in his stomach at that: was it partially a lie? That he’d rather give up something so important to him? He couldn’t tell. But if it meant casting someone else out...

It was complicated in an ugly, dissonant way, and Jihoon loathed the feeling.

“You don’t have to lie to me, Jihoon,” your voice proceeded to decrescendo as you spoke. “You don’t know me at all. It’s okay if you don’t want me here.”

“I mean it,” he pushed. “Yes, my music’s a part of who I am... and I think it’s a part of who I was, too, but I don’t think it’s fair to blame you for the reason I’m stuck. Sometimes I get stuck. Every creative person would tell you that it happens and we just have to get through it.” He leaned forward, trying to catch a better glimpse of your face. Maybe if you looked at him and saw how serious he was, you’d realize he was telling the truth. “Minghao would tell you if you asked him, and so would Soonyoung. Sometimes he tries dancing and the moves don’t work. It happens.”

“It didn’t happen like this until I came here,” you said. “I asked the others.” The tell-tale sound of your voice cracking was a sign that you were getting close to tears. “Jihoon, I’m sorry if it somehow caused it.”

“Don’t apologize,” he said, his voice a little too sharp for his own liking. He took a quiet breath, pressing his lips together for a moment. “You couldn’t have affected me,” he said, despite the tiny voice in the back of his mind telling him otherwise. “It’s just a creative block. It happens. I promise.”

You didn’t believe him, and he could tell. “Then what gets you out of it?”

“That’s...” He trailed off. Usually, he would just busy himself elsewhere. Doing chores, playing games with the others, sometimes working out. It would just resolve itself in time.

You turned to him. “Then let me help you. Maybe I can help inspire you.”

Jihoon wanted to tell you that it didn’t work like that. That inspiration didn’t just come to him like that anymore. Every song he worked on, every unfinished lyric... It felt like something deep down that he knew when he was writing.

Instead, he nodded. “Okay,” he said. “You don’t have to. I’ll be okay.”

“I want to help you.”

It scared him, just a little. But if you were serious, and he could tell that you were, then... He would let you get a little closer. Even if it turned out fruitless in the end, at least he gave you a chance this time instead of pushing you away again. He could at least appreciate your effort in the end.

And yet that night, he felt it. The itch of inspiration in the back of his mind that made him pull away from Seokmin--who had secured Jihoon in his arms in a quiet way of trying to comfort him. He made some excuse to the sleepy man about going to the bathroom, and immediately made a beeline to find his notebook and a pencil. He flipped through it, humming the melody to himself as he found a new page. He sketched in his own wobbly sheet music, filling in the notes as he knew they were supposed to fall. It was like he always had it inside of his heart, printed in ink that he just had to read to remember. The lyrics came to him easily, too:

secretly laughing, secretly crying / while hiding my state

the day that seems too much for me passes by...

Jihoon hummed to himself as he wrote the first verse, lyrics light on his lips as he sang to himself. He was quiet, but the syllables always fell perfectly into place every time. It wasn’t like real songwriting, he realized after the first few times. He knew these songs. They were finished products that he was regurgitating onto paper now. Writing original songs were always different: more stress, more strain, more writing and rewriting and striving for perfection. These always came to him. Like they were meant to be.

don’t be sorry. don’t worry. don’t be scared. now don’t cry...

And then it was gone. The itch was soothed, and instead he was left with an empty feeling as that bout of inspiration dried up too quickly. He craved more, the sweet taste of writing music lingering on his lips. He dropped the pencil onto the page, staring down at it. He felt like the next lyric was right there within his reach, and yet it wouldn’t come to him, no matter what tricks he tried to lure it closer. He buried his face in his hands after a moment, frustrated with himself in a way that was beyond words.

“Jihoon?”

He looked up, and there stood Jeonghan, half-asleep.

“Are you okay?” He said, rubbing his eyes. “You shouldn’t force it if you’re still struggling to write.”

Jihoon almost answered with the fact that he did manage to write something, but he stopped. The others always said that his music felt like something they all knew. A key to who they were before. If he told them now when he couldn’t guarantee his skills were back... What was he supposed to do if this was just a fluke? Disappoint them again? He’d rather die than face that.

“Right,” Jihoon put his notebook back. “I just... I thought I had something.”

Jeonghan wrapped an arm around him as he emerged from the room, starting to guide him back to bed. “It’ll come back to you,” he said. “I’m sure of it.”

Jihoon could only hope that he was right.

“What do you normally write about?”

You’d been hanging around Jihoon after both of you finished your chores for the day. He was sitting across from you, thumbing back through one of his notebooks of songs. He told you that he’d never managed to finish one, like something wouldn’t let him do it--the words never falling into place correctly when he tried. He had carefully handed the notebook over to you, and you saw that that was the truth: nothing was finished. Some had just a verse, others had the chorus written in according to Jihoon. You could only imagine how frustrating it was, especially for someone who was so passionate about this.

“Love, sometimes,” he said. “Sometimes sad things. It’s funny...” He mused aloud. “Sometimes it felt like I was writing for all of us, before you came.”

You looked up, brows raising in curiosity. “Huh?”

“Like...” He flipped to a song, and he softly sang the opening verse underneath his breath. You loved the way his voice sounded, and yet you could see the slight discontent on his face. “It always felt right for Seokmin’s voice. I can still sing all of them, but sometimes I ask the others to join me. And... it always sounds better when they do it.”

Maybe that’s why you ruined him, you thought to yourself. Because you weren’t a part of this group. That only raised more questions of who they were and who you were.

Instead, you settle on trying to tease him a little, “Maybe you were musicians in a past life. You’d be good at it, at least.”

He smiled, the heat rising into his face--and you could see the tips of his ears turning pink. “Thank you,” he said. “That would mean a lot of people enjoy my music. That’s... sweet of you.”

“So,” you said after smiling back at him. “To inspire you...” You hummed to yourself. “Maybe we should fall in love.”

Jihoon immediately went red at the suggestion, looking away. “That’s not funny,” he said, visibly flustered. “You sound like Soonyoung. And Seokmin. And Hansol--”

Despite your joke being far from original, you giggled. “Looks like everyone wants you to fall for them, Jihoonie. I guess makes you our Jihoonie...”

He looked up, the slightest sense of familiarity in his eyes. “Our Jihoon...?”

“I dunno, maybe we should look for things that remind you of love.” You hummed to yourself, thinking back. “Maybe flowers? Mingyu said there’s a patch near the forest--around the lake, I think. People give flowers to their loved ones a lot, right?”

That familiarity seemed to fade as he nodded along. “Right...”

“Then let’s go look!” You smiled at him.

Jihoon couldn’t really tell you no, if he was honest: it was nice to see you genuinely excited for something. It was better than the you he was more familiar with, always walking on eggshells around him like you did those first few days. The way your eyes sparkled were hard to reject, and you seemed so genuine about this, too. Like you truly wanted to help him, even though he was sure this was going to be useless in the end. He followed you out of the church, his notebook tucked away in his bag as he let you take the lead.

“Hey... Jihoon?” You spoke up on your walk along the riverside. “What was it like before I came here?”

He blinked at you, uncertain of what to say. He had stories--it was hard not to with this group--but... Where could he begin? The time he woke up to Joshua and Seokmin having a rap battle out in the common area over breakfast, before anyone else had woken up? The time Mingyu spat so hard after brushing his teeth it hit Jeonghan in the face (something Jihoon had heard secondhand)?

So he told you what he could. About those times and beyond. The times Soonyoung drank too much and went for a run that they joked would be a new world record (truthfully, they could claim any of their successes as such: no one else to compete against anymore except each other). 

Maybe he’d have stories with you, too, soon. Just things he could laugh about in the future.

Despite how pretty the flowers were, he felt nothing musically in that moment. He told you outright (it’d be wrong for him to lie, wouldn’t it?) but that there was always next time. That had made you smile, and Jihoon realized he wanted to see that sight again. You had a nice smile.

“C’mon,” you pat the spot on the ground next to you. “We have time. Sit down before we have to walk back.”

Jihoon sat down after a moment, pulling his bag from over his head as he set it next to him. You were already picking flowers, twirling them between your fingertips. How could one person be so easy going sometimes? He knew you were afraid, that you were still trying to figure out what life meant for the fourteen of you. Everyone always was, after all. And yet there you sat next to him, the sunlight kissing your skin as you played with flowers.

“How are you like this?” He asked without thinking, and you looked up. “Aren’t you scared?”

You nodded. “I am. But...” You crossed your legs, and reached out to tenderly place one of the flowers behind his ear. “There’s a lot of pretty things here. Like your music. I think they help a lot.”

The nature part he could understand. The other? He just stared at you, at a loss for words. “My music helps...?”

“Remember how you sang on my second day here?”

He nodded. Before the bonfire Seungcheol had put together. Jihoon hadn’t been planning to sing at all that day, really, but... He felt a push to. Seungkwan had asked him to as well, saying he liked hearing his songs. He remembered the hurt look on your face when he was going to stop singing, and Jihoon was thankful that Seungkwan was more mindful of you than he had been.

“I think about it sometimes,” you said. “Your voice is so pretty, but... The lines are beautiful themselves.” Jihoon could already feel his face growing warmer at your compliments. “Just the, uh...  ‘Stay here with me’ line? I think about it sometimes.”

“Is that why you stayed?” He teased you lightly, just to see the wide-eyed look on your face as you immediately backtracked--making some comment about how you decided to stay because of everyone, not just him. He laughed, light and airy. “I understand,” he said. “You don’t have to explain.”

“Wait... Were you teasing me?” You were smiling. “Aw, Jihoonie..” You giggled. “Does that mean you like me?”

“I’ve always liked you,” he said. “Just because I was uncertain in the beginning didn’t mean I disliked you.”

You nodded. He had a point there--You were uncertain, too. There really wasn’t anyone you disliked when you first came. Some you liked more than others, yes, but that didn’t imply disdain for anyone. “I’m glad,” you said. “I like you, too.”

Jihoon didn’t have a song right then and there, but inspiration struck again that night. The melody lodged itself in his throat with the words mixed in, and he left bed to go write. In the low light, he worked, writing out notes and lyrics as he went.

in the future / so i won’t be sorry / I want to always be waiting / that makes me feel better

even if you get lost / and it takes you a while / come round and round back to me / even if it’s far ahead in the future

And then it was gone again. It made him want to tear his hair out, always stopping too short now. Like he tasted ambrosia and the rest of the dish was pulled away right as he wanted more. Even if the itch of inspiration left him, he always felt frustrated now. He felt like someone was feeding him those words one by one before putting the plug back in before they fully drained back into him.

“It’s them, isn’t it?”

Jihoon jumped at the sight of Hansol standing in the doorway. He thought he would have heard him approaching, the same way he had heard Jeonghan. But Hansol apologized, making his way into the room after a moment.

“No. I just felt inspired--”

“Both times after they spent time with you,” Hansol said. “We get it, dude.” He gave him a small smile, yet he seemed more timid than usual. “If it’s them... Then maybe it’s them for a reason.” He grew quiet again, almost reluctant to admit his thoughts. “Sometimes... I think they’re making me remember something, too.”

“Have you?”

“Not really,” Hansol sighed. “Like. Okay, it’s gonna sound weird, but... It’s kind of like a sneeze, okay? Like it’s right there, but it won’t just happen. Maybe if I spent more time with them, I’d remember something by now. But... I don’t know. I think I’m okay for right now.” He leaned back against the wall. “I want to remember, I really do, but I want to do it on my own terms.”

Jihoon understood, even though he couldn’t relate. All he’d ever had was his music and his given name. It’d be nice to have something real back: his history, not just his songs. It felt good to have those back, sure, but what about him as a person? There had to be more to him than just his music, right?

“C’mon,” Hansol nudged him back toward the hall. “Let’s go back to bed.”

Jihoon went along with him, making a mental note to himself. He’d have to be more careful from now on just to make sure he didn’t wake anyone else up. He wanted to do this privately, after all.

No sense in getting anyone’s hopes up if you weren’t the key to remembering, after all.

”I’m not asking because I want to stop,” you said to Jihoon one day while walking along the fields. The sun was going to set soon, and that meant the two of you would need to head in for dinner. “But... Why is your music so important to you, exactly?”

Jihoon didn’t really have an answer for you when you asked. It just always had been. It was a key part of who he was and who he became after he came here. Except maybe it was a part of the way he expressed himself before he came, and now he was just tapping into that. He could write emotions into his lyrics and it’d feel refreshing.

And now... It felt like his music was an answer he didn’t know he was looking for.

“It just is,” was what he settled on.

“Oh.” You looked upset, and Jihoon realized how his tone was a little too sharp. A little too icy, unintentionally. “Sorry, Jihoon, I didn’t mean to cross a line--”

“Don’t apologize,” he said quickly. “Sorry. I just mean... It always has been. The others said I used to be restless when I first came here. I couldn’t sit still because it always felt like there was something I was supposed to be doing.” He tucked his hands into his pockets. “Cheol found a notebook and said I could write my thoughts in it if I wanted to.” He knew his notebook rested inside of his bag. “I used to journal in it, but it didn’t help. I thought that maybe I was just thinking too much. Then I wrote a part of my first song.”

You looked up from where you’d been kicking a pebble along the ground. “And that helped?”

“It was a miracle that he found a guitar for me.” Jihoon was watching where he stepped, no attention paid to you. “It helped. Sometimes I have to play a song to get it right.”

“You say that like you aren’t making them up yourself.” You laughed softly. “Like, aren’t they yours? You act like they’re already made.”

“I think they are.” He looked up. “I think I wrote these in my previous life.”

You realized how serious he looked. “Oh.” And then you understood: Jihoon’s songs had to be his key to finding out who he was. “So that’s why they’re important to you.”

“What’s important to you, then?” Jihoon asked. “Has anything made you feel closer to remembering?”

You twisted your mouth in frustration. (Oh. Sore topic, Jihoon realized.) You merely walked along, trying to pinpoint something that made you feel more like yourself. Mealtimes, maybe, but even then that was more a sense of belonging to something--like a family--than it was a sense of recognizing yourself. You opened your mouth to talk, only for your foot to slip out from underneath you.

Jihoon immediately caught you by the hand, pulling you back to steady you. Despite the fact that you thought he would, he didn’t pull away immediately.

“Be careful,” he told you quietly. (He didn’t tell you that he kind-of liked the weight of your hand in his own.)

You just let him hold your hand, happy to have someone who can anchor you. Even though you knew he didn’t reciprocate the budding crush you were developing for him (it was hard not to: he was passionate and talented and cute as hell), you were glad Jihoon was watching out for you now. It made you want to watch out for him more, too. But...

His hands were warm. It made you feel safe.

(Your hands made him feel safe, too. Safe enough to wake up with lyrics in his head, feeling closer to something. He wrote the words ‘above that endless sky / this night of stars pouring down / is looking at you sleeping next to me’ while thinking about your sleeping face across from his own. ‘No matter what happens / don’t worry, i’m by your side’ came to him, too.)

“I know where I want to go today.”

It was rare for Jihoon to lead the way. He’d only done it one other time where he wanted to walk by the river, that time being aimless. Yet this time, he had a specific place in mind. He guided you out to the river, nodding toward the path up the hill. You hadn’t been upstream before, and Jihoon gestured for you to follow closely. He was gentle in telling you which spaces could get slippery, more than you’d expect, and to just let him know if you needed him to guide you by hand at any point. The walk uphill was harder, after all, and he understood that. You stayed close to him, listening to the sounds of nature as Jihoon had no stories he wanted to tell you, apparently. You were okay with that. Sometimes it was nice to go for a peaceful walk with Jihoon, even though your legs were aching a bit by the time you finally crested that hill. He walked a little further, sitting down in the grass before looking up at you.

“Sometimes I come up here to look at everything.” He looked ahead.

“This feels special,” you said. “Are you sure you want me to know about it?”

He nodded. “You’re one of us,” he said. “Everyone else knows. I want you to know, too. You’re special to me--Like the others are.” You could see color leaking into his face, red and pink tinting his ears and his cheeks. “You’re all special to me. I just wanted you to know about this place, too. Look--”

He started to point things out from there, distracting you from his embarrassed expression before you could tease him a little for it. You could see the church from there. He pointed out the spot that Hansol liked to go out to in order to stargaze, farther in the distance than you’d expect. In the other direction, out past where you had your bonfire with them, he told you the city was beyond those hills. If the hill the two of you sat on now was taller, you’d probably be able to see some buildings in the distance if you looked hard enough.

“I can see my world from here,” he said. “Mostly, at least. You can see where the lake is--even though the trees are in the way.”

You turned to look. “It’s pretty.”

“All of this is all I’ve ever known since I woke up,” he said. “I don’t remember much about my life. All I really have is my name and my music. I think that makes us similar.”

You turned back to face Jihoon. Similar...?

“I remember little parts, though,” he said. “Like studying music for a really long time. Or watching TV, or playing games... I remember working hard for a really long time.” He pulled at the grass underneath him. “But that’s it. Sometimes I think my music is all I am.”

“That’s not true.” You frowned. “You’re more than your music, Jihoon. You’re our hardworking Jihoonie,” you giggled. “And I love that about you. You’re like...”

Jihoon looked up after you took too long to continue. “Like?”

“The eye of a storm, I think.” You frowned. “Or like winter. A lot of the others tend to be high energy--like Soonyoung, or Chan, or Mingyu... It’s nice to have people who balance it out and make things feel peaceful. You’re dedicated to what you do. People like you and Minghao help this family feel like home at the end of the day.” You laid your hand over his own, not saying a word about it--and Jihoon wasn’t sure if you noticed. “I’m glad you’re here, Jihoon. I know things were different at the start, but... I’m glad you understand how I feel, too. Sometimes it feels like all I am is an amnesiac who couldn’t even remember their own name.”

“That isn’t true, either,” Jihoon said. “You work hard. You always try to include people in things and take care of us. You don’t have to remember who you are to be someone important to me--to us.”

You could feel the heat rushing to your face. “That’s sweet, Jihoon. You’re sweet,” you leaned forward, brushing your lips against his cheek. “We should head back. Mingyu wanted me to help with dinner tonight,” you stood up, extending a hand to him. “Shall we?”

Jihoon took your hand, letting you pull him to his feet. You didn’t let go until you came back to the church. You had giggled at him, saying that you didn’t need him to make sure you wouldn’t fall anymore--but you appreciated him holding on. Jihoon, on the other hand, didn’t realize how natural it felt to hold your hand on that walk back.

Lyrics flow from him easily that night, his heartbeat in his ears as he worked.

what do i do with you? / i look at you but i think of you even more / you’re my only one / what do i do?

what do i do with you? / what do i do because of you? / every day, every day, every day / i like you so much, what do i do?

Jihoon sat, staring at his notebook and the words he wrote. He reread them over and over, panic already setting in as he realized exactly what was starting to blossom in his chest. Oh no. Oh no. You’d been on his mind the entire time while he was writing, but that was normal. It was normal for him to think of you while he wrote lyrics now. It was your outings, wasn’t it? Just like Hansol said. You were the key, so thinking of you was safe and normal. The stupid soft smile on his face was normal, too. He’d written love songs before, and yet...

Yet...

Fuck.

Jihoon avoided you for several days after he realized how he was feeling toward you, something he already deemed unfair without a second thought. The others noticed the way he was pushing you away again, making an excuse to do chores he was picking up for the others. Except this time, ever rebuff has an apology attached to it that he wholeheartedly meant. He was sorry he couldn’t go for another walk with you, that he couldn’t join you in making snacks, that he was too busy for another game with you and the others. He snapped more easily at other people, always realizing how sharp his words were again and apologizing immediately after. Then he started pushing the others away, opting for his alone time.

And that alone time was spent curled up somewhere with that same notebook and pencil, staring at a page that he wanted to write words onto. To add new notes, to write something good again. Instead, he was stuck wishing he had the damn words to say. Nothing was coming to mind, as if stopped out entirely. All he could think about, as much as he hated to admit it, was you, you, you en continuo with no coda in sight. A continuous crescendo of thoughts dedicated to you, to the way you smiled, to the way the light would hit your skin: and yet no matter what songs he wanted to spin for you, he came up short every time.

Seungcheol found him staring at his notebook. “Can I read it?”

Jihoon let him. Seungcheol pulled it from his lap, watching the numb way Jihoon had been staring off into space. He flipped through the recent pages, the last song that he wrote. And... he just knew.

“How does this one go?” He asked after a moment, setting it into Jihoon’s lap before going to retrieve the guitar. He pointed out one of the pages--not the newest, but one of the few before it. The day that Jihoon had gone with you to the lake, and you managed to sweet-talk him into joining you in the water for a bit. Your laugh enchanted him, he swore.

Or maybe it was the way your eyes always lit up when you saw him. The way you smiled. The way your presence rivaled the sun; every sappy word he’d read in romance novels, he now wanted to pen them again for you in a song. Jihoon strummed the guitar to test whether he needed to tune it again, and took a deep breath once satisfied.

“My love only amounts to this...”

He played the chords, eyelids lowering as he played the song by heart. A melody he had hummed to himself over and over. He thought, out of the corner of his eye, he could see someone at the entrance. Seungcheol side-stepped, standing in the way as he gestured for him to continue.

“Hello, my joy. Even in deep despair, you always make me laugh. By my side, you let me forget everything for a moment...”

And he kept playing, still singing, beyond the words he’d written on the page. Beyond the notes, beyond anything he’d ever written before. He just knew it, like the song was a part of him.

And for the first time since he came, Jihoon finished a song. He felt exhaustion set in immediately, like it took everything he was to finish something like this.

This was his. This wasn’t just his. It was complicated, but he felt like it was something that he made that didn’t belong to just him. Our Jihoonie came back to mind. He squeezed his eyes shut, feeling as if a memory was pushing at the front of his brain. Our Jihoon? Our Jihoon. The name felt familiar on his tongue, and yet it seemed to seep away. But he knew one thing:

This was because of you. It’s you.

Seungcheol turned back to the doorway, and said the one thing that Jihoon didn’t want to hear: “Mouse?”

He stepped out of the way, and there you were, slack-jawed and staring like you’d heard something beautiful. You had, hadn’t you? You always said his music was beautiful (that he was beautiful, but Jihoon thought that was just Mingyu teasing). You blinked once, twice, and stuttered out an apology before quickly taking off.

Jihoon stared at where you’d been standing for a moment before immediately pushing the guitar into Seungcheol’s hands. He followed you out, already looking for you. Soonyoung was sitting on the couch, more focused on his conversation with Hansol than anything else.

“Where did they go?” He asked, and Soonyoung looked up. “Mouse. Where did they go, Soonyoung?”

Soonyoung stared at him for a moment, before he pointed to the way out. Jihoon thanked him, immediately heading that way. He slipped into his shoes on the way out, climbing out of the hole in the back of the church. Chan told him that you were heading toward the river when he passed by you, and that you looked troubled. Jihoon didn’t need to ask which way. He just knew.

Sure enough, he found you at the top of the hill. You were standing with your back to him, staring off toward the setting sun. He admired the way the sunset painted you in shades of orange and gold, kissing your skin in the way he wished to gently hold you. You didn’t look up, and he said nothing. He let the sound of crunching grass speak for him.

“You said you’ve never finished a song before,” you said after a moment. You didn’t sound hurt, just... confused. Lost. “Is that true?”

He nodded, despite your back being to him. He found his voice a moment later. “Yes.”

“So you finished one this time?”

“I didn’t write it down,” he said. “It just... came to me.”

You looked back, finally facing him. The troubled look on your face seemed to dissipate a little, now replaced with more confusion. “Oh. So... I’ve really been helping you, then?”

He nodded once more. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“You didn’t have to.” You took a step toward him before stopping, too uncertain to keep coming closer. Always mindful of his need for space. “Your music is something personal to you. You didn’t have to tell me if you wrote anything at all--”

“You inspire me,” he cut you off. There was a familiar squeeze in his chest, a need to tell you right then and there how he felt. “Everything I wrote ever since you came was because of you. You helped me. I think... You opened up my world a little more.” He took a step toward you. “And I think I need to be honest with you instead of pushing you away more.”

You almost stepped back. “Jihoon?”

“I think I’m falling in love with you.” He balled his fists, nails biting into his skin, just to keep his nerve. No backing out now: he needed to do this. “I think you’ve been patient with me and understanding in a way I didn’t expect. The others know me differently. You... You never pushed and always apologized when you thought you did." He took a deep breath. “I know you don’t feel the same, but I wanted to tell you so that you understood why I kept pushing you away--”

“You don’t know how I feel.”

He stared at you, already feeling his words escape him again. “What?”

“Jihoon,” you reached out, taking his hands into your own. He relaxed them, feeling the way your fingers then enclosed around his. Your touch was warm. Just like you always were. “Why wouldn’t I like you like that?”

“I...” He didn’t know. He never had a reason. He just... thought you never could see him in that way. That all of this was your way of befriending him.

“You’re so dedicated to everything that you do,” you said. “And... When you play your music, you get lost in this whole other world. You love it and it shows.” You averted your gaze, “And I wanted to help you get that back because I like you. You’re funny with the others and--and you always look out for everyone when you can. That’s why I started trying to look out for you more, too.”

Jihoon didn’t think for the first time in a while. He leaned in, lips pressing against your own as need overtook want. Just to know that this is real. That you were real and in front of him. When you kissed back, he knew it was.

That name came back to the tip of his tongue. He thought it was his. Yet when you kissed back, his mind went blank in the best way. Our Jihoon--But he just wanted, in that moment, to be your Jihoon.

He pulled back, not looking at your face. His ears were turning red at the boldness of his actions. “I want to try this,” he said. “Us. I want to try to be a good partner,” he held your hands tightly, “So let me take you on dates without it being just for inspiration. Okay? Let me make it up to you.”

“Jihoon...”

“I... I want you to fall in love with me completely,” he said in a lower voice. “And I want to fall in love with you, too. So... Can we try...”

He felt your lips brush against his cheek. He finally raised his eyes to meet your own, smiling.

You were smiling at him. “I wanna try falling in love with you,” you said with the softest giggle, always so endeared by how flustered he could become. “But... Jihoon?”

He reached up to brush a stray strand of your hair back, and his fingers grazed your jaw. “Yes?”

“Even if I’m not there yet, either,” you took his face into your hands, “I mean it when I say that I love you, okay?”

He understood that. Even though he wasn’t sure which way he loved you, he knew that he loved you. And he said it, leaning into your touch. Yet the privacy of sharing this moment with you made his gaze flicker down to your lips for a moment. “May I kiss you again?” He asked, and then realized this might be moving too fast. “You don’t have to--”

“I’d like that.”

So he leaned in, lips slanting against your own. He savored the moment, the light you were bringing back into his life with your presence alone. Even if he wasn’t fully in love with you yet...

... He truly thinks he will be. You were his joy. He could only hope that he was yours, too.

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