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#and it’s so tiring like. I know. I’ve even told you all this before!
ambrosiagoldfish · 1 day
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Adam x third spouse part 3 I’m begging pookie ❤️
like a time skip to when Charlie appeared and proposed the idea
Benifit of the doubt Pt.4
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Adam x 3rd Spouse! Reader
Warnings: General Adam TW’s, a little bit sad for a moment but it’s ok. Gn! Reader! honestly that’s about it I think?? Wow this is the first time it’s been this short in this series.
Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.
Request Box: Open
Word Count: 4617~
A/n: So… it’s been almost 2 months… whoops. In all seriousness though I’m sorry it’s been so long. I’ve just not been in the mood to write and a lot of stuff has been happening (which is finally over) and I’m glad I could finally post this. I was also, if I’m honest, nervous to post this, cause I’m not sure if everyone’s ready for the direction of the story. But I have made it clear that I wanted to do a time skip to the show at somepoint and decided to do it now! If you enjoy this, please let me know cause I’m really nervous about (Not my words of affirmation love language coming out-) ALSO to the requester, I know you said part 3, but I used it for part 4. I got your request as I was making part 3 soooo my bad. Hope you don’t mind tho <3 this will be the last part before the angsty finale (and maybe an epilogue)
Reblogs are always appreciated!
Anyways this was NOT beta read unfortunately, I tried to get as many errors out during the writing process so hopefully it’s fine. Also, there’s probably some words I might have wanted to italicize or make bold that aren’t, but I’m too tired to care honestly.
Tags: @tired-of-life-86 @nervoussystemss @qopia @lovelyemily @hcneyiced @v3r41ynn @ghostdoodlen @nxptvne-13 @ximenavc-che @edgyfluff @ericityyy @diffidentphantom @faimmm @slasher-whore69 @1-randomized @ozzersauce @fanlovedlt @alientee (if I forgot someone or you want to be added just tell me !!)
Days turned to weeks, to months, to years. Until eventually an eon had passed. An entirety filled to the brim with an indescribable happiness and love, threatening to spill over at any given moment. You loved Adam and Adam loved you.
To say it was all happiness would be a lie, there were some moments of sadness and pain, but all relationships were like that, even ones that lasted for eternity. You both always bounced back, apologize and moved on with a stronger bond than before. And you loved every second of it.
A lot has changed in these last few eons. Adam formed a band and is now the most popular guitarist in all of heaven. You both made new friends, some got into heaven while others were made there. Emily was one of these people to you, she looked up to you for being older than her. You’ve existed for almost all of human existence so, of course she’d look up to you.
Adam had also made new friends, his band members, some officials in heaven, but someone he’s grown close to recently was Lute. You're really happy about his friendship with Lute. She seems like a strong and loyal friend, someone that can keep him grounded while still encouraging him to be more himself. Overall, you really liked her.
How they became friends though is something… less tasteful for you. All the way back when Heaven and Hell had their first meeting on what to do with the surplus of sinners in hell causing an uprising. Neither side came to an agreement in the end, you do feel partially to blame for that, but you still stand by what you did.
You never returned to any of the follow up meetings
But Adam did, surprisingly to you. In the end, you were called to talk with Sera and Adam. You were told of the agreement between Heaven and Hell, about the yearly “cleanse” that Adam and his “Exorcists” would have to commit. At first you were shocked, sure, you didn’t have the best experience with sinners and especially with the rulers of hell, but was death really necessary? You didn’t know what to say, and Adam clearly saw this.
“Babe, you alright?” He puts his hand on your shoulder rubbing his thumb in circles. You place your hand on his.
“Yeah it’s just a lot to take in. Are we sure it has to be done… that way?”
Sera looked down in pain “they’re… uprising and are becoming to much of a threat to heaven.”
You sighed as Adam took you in his arms. Adam was fully aware that you don’t share the same sentiment towards sinners as he does. His hatred towards the unholy souls down in hell was brought about by events that you simply cannot understand. Which he is thankful for, he never would want you to experience what he did.
“If there isn’t anything else we can do then… I guess we have no choice. But I don’t want to… kill anyone, even if they are sinners.”
Adam holds you closer “You won’t have to,” you smile at him, the now familiar flickering of his LED mask meeting your gaze before softly frown “you ok?”
You nod, “yeah, just…I wish there was another way.”
-
That was it. Adam would take his exorcists down to hell to kill as many sinners as they could each year. Adam knew you didn’t want him to talk about it , he kept it as separate as he could from your life. You did have to attend meetings regarding it, as one of the very few people to know about it, that was your duty.
You were fine with having that part of the job. You weren't sure if you could kill someone, sinner or not. So, for the countless years to follow, you played your part with every new extermination, attending meetings to deal with the repercussions of each cleanse.
Adam would also have to attend the occasional meeting. Which is exactly what today was. Sera had called you both in to talk.
“Thank you both for coming. I have to inform you that you will be attending a meeting tomorrow.”
Adam groaned “What! Again? This is like the 4th fuckin’ one this week! Ugh fine! Where is it this time? halo city? Cherub towne” Adam’s voice mocked the locations you’ve both been sent to countless times with a high pitched voice. Even you have to admit that the meetings could drag a bit.
Sera's face turned into a slight grimace as she looks away from you both, she sighs and continues “The meeting will be in… hell.”
“What!” Both your voices raise in shock
“Sera, you know I don’t want to go down there again!”
“Why can’t you just send the other fucking dipshits who know about-“ Adam crossed his arms defiantly
“Stop,” Sera raises her hand toward you both “no one wants to go there, and I know you both especially don’t.” She pauses “But you both are the only available angels who know of the cleanse that aren't busy. Please… I understand your disdain but heaven’s business comes first.”
“Who are we even gonna be talking to -Wait a damn minute- Don’t fucking tell me we have to talk to him.”
“I'm sorry…” You all sat in silence for a moment before Sera begins to speak again, “But you both won’t have to worry about physically being there, we have prepared holograms for you, so neither of you would be in any danger.”
“I'll have an Angel escort you to the ‘meeting’ room tomorrow, please, get some rest. I’m sure you both have had a long day.”
With that, you and Adam went home, you were definitely not feeling well about the meeting, but the fact you wouldn’t actually be there calms your nerves a bit. You had to be a little honest with yourself, hell wasn’t really the issue for you, it was more so the people. Lucifer for one, that made you feel uneasy.
The next morning, you and Adam got ready, you had to motivate him a little. He was clearly not excited for this meeting like you. The entire way there he held you close, even though nothing could have hurt you it made him feel better knowing how close you were.
On the way there, you also got Adam some ribs, his favorite. You thought it would help his nerves a bit. Turns out, Lute was the one Sera assigned to escort you both there. That also made you both a little calmer knowing a mutual friend would be there.
The three of you waited in the ‘meeting’ room for a while, about an hour. At first you thought the meeting might had been canceled or moved and you just weren't told. But then, Lute walked up to you both.
“Sir! The Seraphim has told me to inform you that there’s been a change in plans!”
“What? The fucks that mean?” Adam said stuffing a rib into his LED mouth
“Lucifer won’t be attending the meeting, instead… his Daughter will be here in his stead.” Lute’s mask showed a continuous frown and stern expression as she spoke.
“Daughter?” Your voice shook a little. This was news to you, as long as you’ve existed you had never heard he had a daughter while in hell. You look over to Adam to see His LED eyes were wide in shock but his mask turned into a smile as he sighed.
“Phew boy, we sure dodged a big ass bullet, huh Sweetcheeks?” He laughed as his arm pulled you closer. The whole thing caused you to join in. Suddenly your nerves felt a lot better than before.
“When should she be arriving, Lute?”
“Within the hour.”
-
Adam scarfed down another plate of ribs as you all wait for the “princess of hell” to arrive. The entire time you just had to wonder what kind of person she’d be. The daughter of Lucifer and Lilith. The more you thought about it, the more bizarre it seemed.
But suddenly your thoughts were interrupted by the sliding doors opening to the meeting room and a girl steps in, asking if anyone is there.
“She can’t see us?”
“Yeah, Sera gave me a long ass lector on how this stuff works before we got here. Let’s see here…” Adam pushes a button causing a click to sound out as he says “Sup!”
The girl jumps back and falls to the floor, shocked by Adam’s sudden appearance in the room. She introduces herself as Charlie. Adam offers her to shake his hand, only for it to go through.
“Ha! I fuckin’ got you! Did you fucking see that? Good shit.”
You let out a slight laugh, as you sit and watch the meeting happen. Well, you say “meeting” but nothing about it seemed very professional. Adam for the last hour (you honestly wasn’t sure at this point) had been talking about the most random of things.
You or Lute occasionally shakening your head yes or no while listening to him, while Charlie seemed quite tired already. Not that you could blame her, people who weren’t used to Adam’s banter definitely weren’t cut out for it. But You love every word that comes out of his mouth.
Eventually Adam decides that it’s time to get into what you all came here for. Pulling out a bunch of papers, Charlie begins explaining her solution to hell’s overpopulation. You were only really half listening at first, at least before she mentioned that her solution could stop the extermination which peaked your interest.
She explains her “Hazbin Hotel” and its purpose to rehabilitate sinners, you wanted to hear more of it but Adam cut her off.
The meeting didn’t really go that well, At least for Charlie. But the whole thing left quite the impression on you. The idea of ending the extermination was stuck in your head for so long, and now you had someone who had an alternative.
“Adam, are you sure that it couldn’t have worked?”
Adam looks at you in surprise “What? Do you think that shitshow could have actually worked?” He laughed as he placed a hand on your back. “Don’t even pay it any mind, alright Babe?”
“I know, it’s just… you know I don't like the extermination. So another way to lessen the population of hell should at least be looked into.” Your voice was soft enough to barely hear.
Adam’s gaze softened but he didn’t say another word, only wrapping his wing around you pulling you closer. You lean towards him, snuggling into his soft robe. No matter how much you wanted to ignore it, you couldn’t. You needed to do something, anything.
So that night, after Adam fell asleep, you asked to talk with Sera. Leaving a note for Adam saying you went to buy something just in case he woke up.
“What is troubling you?” Sera’s voice was clear and concise.
You looked toward the ground, your nerves feeling tighter than ever, as you struggled with how to put your words together. “You're aware of all that happened in the meeting with Lucifer’s Daughter, right?”
Sera nods her head “of course, all meetings are documented about as they happen.” She tilts her head slightly “What about it?”
“Well!” You steel yourself before continuing “I would like permission to observe Charlie Morningstar’s ‘Hazbin Hotel’”
Sera’s eyes widen, breaking her calm demeanor before giving a firm “No”
“But-“
“It’s too dangerous for you to be there, Adam wouldn’t want that anyways”
“He would listen if it was an order from you!” Your eyes felt watery but you continued “Please Sera… I know you don’t want the extermination to continue. Just let me do this!”
Sera looked away from you, her feelings evident on her face, any mask now down. ‘Just a little more’ you thought
“Sera, I promise you, I’ll be careful! We don’t even have to fully support them yet, just let me observe them. It would be devastating if so many souls parish if we failed to seek all options!” You beg
Sera sighed, shakingly “…I’ll see what I can do.”
Your eyes gleamed up at the tall woman “Sera, thank you, thank you!” You wanted to hug her but out of courtesy, you advised against it.
Sera tells you that she can’t guarantee anything but she will try as she sends you home to rest.
-
A few days past after that and you haven’t heard anything from Sera. It was a little worrying and felt like a bad sign to you. That was, until you were informed by Sera that your request was accepted!
“But.” Sera stops you before you can celebrate “You're only there to keep track of the progress and to make sure nothing is happening under our noses” You nod your head in understanding
“Also…” she pauses “If anything involving this hotel happens, you will have to take full responsibility, understood?”
You nod again “yes I understand. Have you… told Adam yet?”
She shakes her head
“Ok… can you… not tell him it was my idea, please. I don’t think he’d agree if he knew.”
Sera sighs before nodding her head “Very well, I’ll tell him after you leave”
“Thank you.”
-
You return home, when you got back Adam was already gone, Sera must have already called him to the office. You dreaded when he got back. You didn’t want to see him upset, it hurt you to know how worried he was for you.
A few hours later, Adam comes through the door in a panic. He stomps up to you and pulls you into a warm and intense embrace.
“Don’t go down there. I need you here with me” his voice hitches as his wings wrap around you both, curling you both into a warm and feathery ball.
“Adam…” you paused, was this really the best thing to do? No, It had to be. If this goes well, not only will the extermination stop but Adam wouldn’t have to go down to hell ever again.
“Adam, you know I can’t go against Sera’s orders.” You kiss his cheek “and I won’t be gone forever, I’m only supposed to be there till the next cleanse. Not to mention, I’ll always come back to see you.”
Adam grumbled a little “I know, I just… don’t like you being in the same place that bastard is, and in his brat’s stupid hotel! ”
You laugh softly “Adam…” grabbing his hand, you put yours in it, showing off the gold ring on your finger “I’ll never forget my promise. You know that, right?”
Adam looks at the ring, the gold wrapped around your finger with a perfectly snug fit. Everytime he looked at it was just a reminder of your love for him. That promise was something he could never forget. He slowly raises your hand to his LED mask, kissing the back of it. “Of course not.”
“Good. I promise I’ll be fine, ok?”
He nods. Hand in hand, you slowly lead you both to the bed. The both of you lay next to each other, your bodies linked together like knots. You slwoly remove his helmet from his head, laying it on the nightstand.
Your hands move up his body before landing on his face, cupping his cheeks before pulling him to a kiss before snuggling into his chest.
-
Finally it was Time for you to leave. Sera allowed you to create portals back to heaven in case anything happened and you were in need of assistance. Adam walked you to the front gate.
“Ok, do you have everything? You didn’t forget that fucking angelic dagger I had Lute get for you right-“
You shush him “Adam, I told you I’ll be fine!”
He’s sighs “Damn it- I know that but just make sure to text me while your there ok-
You kiss him deeply “Adam. I know, you’ve told me a hundred times.” You smile as you cup his face “I love you”
He sighs “Love you too Sweetcheeks”
With one final kiss, you give Adam a tight hug before waving goodbye as you went through the flaming portal. As you went through, you take a second to look at your surroundings. In front of you was a tall building. You take a few steps back to see LED lights of a sign flashing the words ‘Hazbin Hotel’
You let out a sigh of relief. You had been a tad bit worried you’d spawn somewhere random and you’d have to find the building yourself. But it seems heaven at least spared you of that.
The red skies of hell were quite different from the pristine blue ones of heaven. Even though you just got here, you could already hear the sounds of screams and explosions in the distance. How welcoming.
You steel yourself and with three hard knocks to the door, you wait for someone to open it. Muffled Scurrying sounds of footsteps approach the door before it creaks open revealing the young blond woman in the doorframe, Charlie Morningstar.
“Hi! I’m-“
The door is slammed shut, Before opening again
“Be not afraid-“
It shuts again…
Well, this may be a bit harder than you initially anticipated. You go to knock again only for it to open once more. This time, the door doesn’t close again, instead the girl mutters a quick “Hi” before going quiet.
“Hello! I didn’t mean to scare you!” You give a small laugh before continuing “I believe we met a couple days ago?” You bring your hand towards her for a shake, to which she reciprocates.
“During the meeting with.. Adam? Right?” She grimaced when she mentioned Adam, which you decided to ignore, you simply smiled and nodded. ”but I don’t believe I caught your name?”
You tell her about yourself, about how your there to stay and monitor any progress the hotel may have. You made sure to pronounce ‘may.’ While you were hoping for this idea to show some kind of positive results, even you weren’t sure if it’d would work.
“Charlie? who’s at the door- WhatHolyShit-“ a woman with a red X over her eye suddenly shouts in surprise. You look over at her, She looked very familiar…
“Wait, you are-“
“Vaggie! Charlie’s sinner girlfriend! And you are?!” The woman known as Vaggie, highlighted the word sinner while performing a “be quiet” gesture with her hand. Your eyes widen a little at the ex-Angel in front of you but you simply smile a nod “I’m Y/n, I don’t believe we’ve met, yes?”
Look, lying is the last thing you’d want to do as a citizen of heaven but you figured that it would be fine if it was to protect someone. Vaggie nodded, her face scrunched up in a tense look.
“You feeling ok Vaggie? You’re looking a little… red?”
“I’m fine! *ahem*, Hun, how about you give them a tour of the hotel.”
Charlie gasped “Yes that's perfect, you may as well get acquainted with everyone if you’re going to be here more often!”
Charlie ran off, telling you “this way! This way!” Over and over. Before you went to follow her, you leaned toward Vaggie and said a quick “Relax, I won’t tell anyone.”
She lets out a sigh before muttering “Thank you”
You both follow Charlie as she shows you the various rooms in the hotel before leading you back to the hotel’s lobby and lounge area.
“Hey! Hello everyone!” Charlie’s voice picked up a little “I’d like to introduce you to our uh… new staff member?” You nod in agreement with the title. The room in front of you was shrouded in looks of both horror and amazement.
“What the hell’s an angel doin’ here?” A lanky spider demon spoke up first
“It’sss an ambush! seek Cover!!” The Snake demon shouted, seemingly grabbing an army helmet from thin air before taking a deep dive behind the couch.
“No Pentious-” She sighs “they’re here to monitor the hotel! Heaven sent them to scout any potential progress the hotel will have”
“It’s nice to meet you all” you look at the people in front of you, to say it was a colorful cast would be an understatement.
“These two are our current tenants of the hotel! Angel dust and Sir Pentious!”
The snake slithered slowly from behind the couch up to you, while the Spider demon remained rested on the couch
“Oh… *ahem* Excuse me dear! I am Sir. Pentious! Formally known as ‘the Architect of destruction’!” He laughs, a slight hiss sounding in his voice.
He offers a handshake which you accept. To which you immediately regret. ‘ Slimey’ you thought, before wiping your, now wet hand on your clothes.
The spider demon, who you now know as Angel Dust, just gives a wave with one of his 4 arms.
“And-“ Charlie extends the word as she quickly walk to a bar by the entrance “this is the recreational area, run by our Bartender, Husk!”
The winged bartender seemed entirely uninterested in your presence or even Charlie’s. The most you got was a small glance before he takes a swig of his alcohol and walks off.
“He’s not the most… social guy in hell” she awkwardly laughs before moving on to the next person. “And this is Nifty, our one and only maid at the hotel! Nifty say hi.”
The short woman scurried moved around you, her eye quickly looking at every every nook and cranny of you as she moved. She made numerous attempts to touch and grab various things on you, your clothes, wings, and eventually she tried to climb up you to get to your halo. That’s when you finally grabbed her in place “you're a… fast one, huh? Nice to meet you!”
“And last but not least! This is Alastor, the hotel’s executive producer and our first -and only- overlord sponsor!”
Immediately, you could tell there was something off about Alastor. The entire aura he gave off was as if he was restraining something completely and utterly ungodly. The static that surrounded him was just one of many whispers you could hear from his soul.
“Hello! It’s quite a pleasure to meet someone of your… holy status!” He offers a hand to which you, hesitantly, shake. “And what do we owe the pleasure for your service?”
“They’re going to be here to keep track of the progress of the hotel…” Charlie paused “you know I’m starting to sound like a broken record- here, it’s late, how about we all get some sleep and we can talk about it in the morning!”
“Fine by me, I am waaay too sober to be having social interaction this late” Angel picks himself up and stretches “I’m gonna hit the hay”
“Here I’ll show you to your room!” Charlie smiles “We -obviously- didn’t have time to make your own so I hope you don’t mind using one of the guest rooms” she laughs
She and Vaggie walks you to your new room before leaving you be, The room was nothing more than just your average hotel room. Of course it did have its differences, a multitude of… eyes seem to be on the wall, staring at you. Well, that’s not the least alarming.
You place your stuff down and begin unpacking, you mostly just brought the basics. Clothes, hygiene stuff, your phone, and, most importantly, a framed photo of Adam.
You sat the photo on your nightstand, angling it just right so that it would always be visible to you. As you do so, you think about the memory the photo brings, you took it on one of the first dates you went on with Adam. It was a relatively tame date, you and Adam, having a picnic by a lake at night. You brought candles so you both weren’t completely in the dark, and you just loved the way he looked, his golden eyes watching the water. The dim candle light illuminating his face with a warm golden shade. Adam hates photos of him with his mask off but… You just had to keep that moment in time forever.
*Ding* *Ding* *Ding*
Speak of the- well, you know the rest. The bright light from the phone comes with the notification sound displaying Adam in bold letters. You smile as you read his messages.
Dixkmaster69
Heyy Sweetcheeks, it’s been a bit since you left
You there??
Fucking answer
You let out a small laugh at Adam’s barrage of messages. He’s not used to you being away from him for more than a day, huh? Not that you could blame him, this is honestly nothing compared to how you feel each year he has to do the extermination.
Sweetcheeks
Hey love
Everything’s fine, I’m ok.
Aside from not having you with me :’(
Dixkmaster69
Fucking finally
You know you don’t have to do this
If I bitch enough to Sera I can get you back by tomorrow
Sweetcheeks
Please don’t, Sera already has enough on her plate.
I promise I’m going to be fine
I’ll be back before you know it.
Dixkmaster69
I know
This shit just worries me
Gonna miss hearing your sexy ass voice at night too ;)
You blush at the message before sighing. Whenever you or Adam approached a topic that made him uncomfortable, he would always try to change the subject to something that made him feel better. You knew why, Adam’s someone who rarely talked about his feelings, even after all these eons together that was something he hadn’t changed. You knew exactly what he needed, even if he didn’t explicitly tell you.
Sweetcheeks
I already miss yours too <3
Do you want to help me fall asleep with that heavenly voice of yours on the phone?
Dixkmaster69
Whatever you want Sweetcheeks <3
You smile when, almost immediately, Adam begins calling your phone. You click the lights off before You make your way in your new bed, not even bothering to change out of the clothes you’ve been wearing. You grab the cover and pull it over you and tapping the answer button.
“Sup”
You yawn “Hey handsome, I missed your voice”
You hear his voice hitch before he caused on “Of course you did, no one has a better voice than the dick master. But uh, yours is a close second”
You’re let out a tired giggle, “such a charmer, you. How’s your day been huh?”
“Oh! don’t even get me started on that- Lute took me to get some ribs to ‘calm my nerves’ or some shit and they had me, ME, wait in line for like 15 minutes! The fucking audacity!”
You smile to yourself as Adam tells you about his day, the sound of his voice was like a sweet lullaby to your ears and you couldn’t get enough of it. But eventually…
“And then when I got home, I couldn’t find my damn charger and it took me like 40 fuckin’ minutes to realize it was under our bed, do you have any idea of how it keeps getting there?” He waits for you to respond only to be met with silence. “Uh bitch, I’m talking to you.”
More silence… well no, actually if Adam focused on listening, he could hear the faint sound of your snoring from the phone. Adam sighs,”Long day, huh?”
Adam lays back in your shared bed, getting comfortable. He sets the phone beside him, plugging it in while keeping it on speaker. He yawns, “Goodnight Sweetheart, can’t wait to see you again”
Slowly, the soft sounds of both yours and Adam’s snores filled each others rooms, a distant, but intimate connection. Even in slumber, you couldn’t stop thinking of your handsome and caring soulmate.
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fear-is-truth · 2 days
Text
TAG, YOU’RE IT
— Kai Anderson x fem! reader
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WARNINGS: 18+. mdni — porn with plot. violence. vaginal fingering. unprotected p in v. size kink. implied murder. english is not my first language. not proofread as usual
WC: 2.7k
A/N: this was kinda rushed due to school exams and college applications, sorry in advance for the poor quality. but i adored this idea so much, hope it’s not too awful.
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Vanity tables were crammed into the limited space, each adorned with a haphazard array of makeup and tools. Sighing, you grabbed the clown mask that was sitting on your table and pulled it over your head, its cool, rubbery texture making your skin crawl. In the mirror, the grotesque reflection stared back— sickly pale skin mottled in patches of green and blue, reminiscent of moldy cheese. Painted in garish shades of red, the mouth stretched open in a nightmarish grin, revealing rows of jagged teeth.
As you tucked in the stray strands of hair peeking under the latex, your thoughts drifted to your less-than-enthusiastic job as a scare actress in a haunted house. It wasn't as fun as it had been when you first started a year ago, but it paid the bills. Plus, you needed the money, having broken up with your boyfriend whom you discovered was cheating on you. You used to share an apartment together, but now you were on your own, struggling to make ends meet in order to afford a small, dingy one-room apartment in Michigan.
Disgusted at your reflection, you finally tore away your gaze, fingers fumbling to adjust the straps of your tight black and red corset. The garment cinched tightly around your waist, flaunting your assets in such a whorish way that it made you cringe inwardly, and its scandalously low neckline revealed more cleavage than you were comfortable with.
“So, guess who showed up earlier?”
Your eyes flicked over to where your colleague was hunched over her mirror, tying her mousy blonde hair into a ponytail.
“Who? Not Alex again, right?”
“Yes of course I’m talking about Alex.” Lena rolled her eyes, not bothering to hide the disgust she harboured for your ex-boyfriend.
“He came during break time, asking about you,”
You rolled your eyes, annoyed.
“Ugh. The fuck did he want this time? I’ve told him, I didn’t take his stupid DVD-”
“-said he wanted to talk.”
she pulled her mask over her head.
“Well, I’m not interested,”
“Way ahead of you, I told him you were swamped.” Lena's voice came through muffled, her words slightly distorted by the mask she wore. Before you could thank her, a booming, deep voice interrupted from the door frame.
“Hey, scream queens,” Terry, your boss called out, tapping the doorframe. “We’ve got our last visitors for the night. You two are up in five.”
“Just so you know,” Lena added as she finished lacing up her boots, and started for the doorway, “if he keeps on pestering you, I’ll slash his tires.”
Even though she couldn’t see your face through the clown mask, you couldn’t help but smile.
“Thanks,”
“Don’t thank me, I know you’d do the same for me,”
———
Stepping out of the hidden door, you melted into the shadows, waiting for your target to show up. From your vantage point, you could hear footsteps echoing through the dark corridor, signaling their arrival. They turned around the corner, and just as you were about to make your move, a sudden blur of movement startled you. Before you could react, the man swung his arm, the paper cup in his hand spilling its lukewarm contents all over your front.
Stumbling back in surprise, you felt the brown liquid seeping through the eye holes of your rubber mask and trickling down your cheeks, the scent of coffee invading your nostrils.
Furious, you ripped off your mask, wiping the droplets from your cheeks before staring incredulously at the man before you.
“What the fuck?! You asshole!”
He looked like he was in his mid-twenties, a mop of electric blue hair cascading to his shoulders. Hands tucked casually into the pockets of his jeans, he looked down at you.
“Oops, sorry… you scared me, miss,” he apologised somewhat lamely, though you doubted his sincerity, judging by the smirk playing at the corners of his lips. His attention shifted from your face to your revealing clown girl costume, taking in the corset with its low neckline, the miniskirt, and fishnet leggings.
The lasciviousness of his stare made you feel a twinge of unease, as if he was mentally undressing you with his gaze (which, in truth, he probably was). Despite feeling violated by his blatant eyefucking, a small surge of pride bubbled up within you. After all, he was undeniably a prick, but there was no denying his attractiveness—much to your deep annoyance.
“If I wanted to see a cheap Harley Quinn ripoff, I could’ve stayed home and watched porn on my computer. Nice tits, though-”
You were a good, law-abiding citizen, and you certainly weren’t an advocate for violence, but this douchebag was really pushing your limits.
Without thinking, your hand shot out, aiming to wipe that smirk off his face. But before your palm could make contact, his fingers closed around your wrist like a vice, halting your movement mid-air.
“Feisty, aren’t we?”
“Let go of me, you creep-”
“Name’s Kai, by the way.” he snarled, twisting your arms behind your back.
“Kai Anderson,” exerting pressure, he forced you to bend your knees until you were lying on your back, helplessly pinned beneath him.
“I don’t care who the hell you are-”
You spat, thrashing wildly and driving your knee towards his groin. But instead of hitting your intended target, your knee collided with his lower abdomen, which was packed with hard muscle. He must’ve hit the gym alright. Kai’s nostrils flared, but he didn't flinch. If anything, he seemed irritated by your resistance.
His jaw clenched and his eyes hardened. With a sharp crack, his palm connected with your cheek, sending a jolt of pain ringing through your skull and causing your vision to blur momentarily at the edges.
“Y’know,” he began in a voice that was dangerously calm. “If it were someone else disrespecting me like this, I’d do more than a slap. Hell, I’d snap their fucking neck,”
“Wha- what do you want from me?”
Your voice came out in a weak croak as your vision swam back to focus. Strands of blue hair tickled your cheeks as he leaned in closer, his breath hot against your skin. Your faces were inches apart.
“I’m just trying to help you, can’t you see that? You're better off without that worthless piece of shit, Alex.” You blinked, your dazed mind trying to register his words.
“Alex? How’d you.. wait, did he set you up to this? Is this some sort of sick joke!?”
Anger and betrayal flared up, prompting you to resume your struggle. His grip around your wrist tightened, and you could feel your pulse racing in tandem with his.
“No, I’ve been watching you,” his tone was devoid of shame or guilt. “studying you. And I can see that you're too good for him.”
“Aren’t you tired of being the giver, while all he does is take?” he continued. “Everything you do, you do it for him. And how did he repay you? By fucking a random girl at a party. Doesn’t seem fair to me.”
Your limbs slackened in defeat. He was twisting the knife; that part was unmistakable, and he was close to succeeding. The sting of tears threatened to blur your vision, but you staunchly refused to let them fall. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.
“So, let me guess,” you drawled, “next, you’re gonna tell me that you, will treat me better than any man ever could. Yeah, right.”
To your surprise, the corners of his mouth quirked into a wry smile.
“No, I’m not gonna tell you that,”
Kai paused, then took your silence as permission to keep talking.
“You, are an independent, strong woman. You're gonna take what you want and deserve, on your own terms. You don't need a man to do that for you,”
His thumb brushed gently against your bottom lip, dark eyes roaming greedily over your features as if he was trying to commit every single detail to memory.
“Now tell me.. what exactly do you want?”
Heat burned on your cheeks. You had a feeling that you both knew what you wanted.
“Go on,” he coaxed, “You can tell me,”
“You,” your voice was barely unrecognisable to your own ears.
“I want you,”
He smiled, as if he’d been expecting that answer all along. Leaning down, he pressed his lips to yours. Warm, soft. For a split second, your mind seemed to disconnect from your body. He sighed into your mouth before slipping his tongue inside, swiping lazily against your hard palate. You bit back a moan when you felt his clothed erection rub against your thigh.
“Thank you, lamb. Because I want you too,”
A few moments later, he pulled back and let go of your wrists. His hands started to travel down your neck, stopping at the frilly neckline of your corset. With one swift motion, he jerked the cups halfway down, freeing your breasts from their tight confines. You could hear a low groan escape him as he took in the sight of your hardened nipples.
“Fuck… look at those pretty tits. Someday, I’m gonna cum all over them.”
As if driving the point home, he traced his thumb against your nipple, alternating between palming the soft flesh of your breast and pinching your nipple, making you whimper and arch your back, desperate for more stimulation.
“Patience, patience,” he chided teasingly, “There’s something I wanna check first.” His tone was light, but you could sense the effort he put into maintaining his composure, his voice laced with a thinly veiled lust that dripped from every syllable.
Kai’s hand slid lower, skimming past your abdomen and disappearing under your skirt, coming to rest on your inner thigh. He gave the soft, sensitive flesh a squeeze before slipping a finger under your panties. Leaning forward until his face was aligned next to yours, he took your earlobe gently between his lips and sucked it once, the sensation making you shiver in pleasure, before releasing the flesh with a wet pop.
“Hm, just what I thought. So wet for me already,”
He pressed the back of his index between your folds, collecting some of your slick and dragged it up to your clit. Your knees buckled involuntarily when he applied more pressure on the sensitive bundle of nerves.
“Do you want me to stop? Because-”
“No,” you gritted out. “Don’t stop,”
He smiled.
“Wasn’t planning to, anyway,”
Without warning, he unceremoniously shoved two fingers into you, sinking in knuckle deep. A wet, guttural noise escaped your throat at the sudden intrusion and your cunt clenched— once, twice when his sizable digits curled against your sweet spot.
“Like how it feels?”
Unable to form coherent sentences, you nodded, your mind swimming in a lustful haze at the delicious stretch of his fingers scissoring inside you. As soon as your legs began to quiver, Kai retracted his fingers, making you clench around nothing. You couldn’t help but let out a needy whine of indignation. He yanked your soaked panties to your ankles in one, swift tug.
“Good girl. Time for your reward,”
Kai flashed you with a set of pearly white teeth. Triumphant and somewhat predatory, the effect made you tremble in anticipation. He unbuttoned his jeans and yanked down the zipper, shifting his hips to pull his cock out from his boxers.
You had only suspected he was huge, but now it was confirmed—seeing is believing, after all. Quite veiny, too.
Unable to tear your gaze away, you simply gawked as he wrapped his fist around his impressive length, giving it a couple of harsh pumps before positioning himself between your legs.
You moaned in unison as he pushed inside you, pleasure accompanied by pain shooting straight through your cunt to your entire body. The mere size of him stretched you; filled you up in a way that nobody else had ever done before. Made you wonder if your body was physically capable of accommodating him. It stung, but it also made you feel whole. Squeezing your eyes shut, you dug your fingernails into his shoulder, leaving crescent indents.
“Hah— oh fuck, baby…you’re so perfect for me-”
Kai’s voice cracked as he bottomed out, his handsome features twisting in rapture as your walls clamped down on him. He paused, giving you a moment to adjust before pulling back slowly, just to slam back into you with a grunt. You swore that you could feel the tip of him touching your gut and you mewled. He soon established a rhythm that was both harsh and punishing, prompting your pussy to tighten around him ominously.
“Nngh—ahh…Kai, please, it’s to much-”
Curling an arm behind you, his hand snaked to the back of your skull, fingers tangling in your hair before finally, finally, he crushed his lips onto yours in a searing kiss. You felt him throb inside you as his thumb worked against your clit furiously, and that was all it took to send you over the edge.
The hot coil finally snapped, and your hands found purchase in his hair to hold him in place as your orgasm crashed over you. You keened as a wave of white-hot pleasure rippled through your veins, leaving your nerves tingling and muscles twitching. Through your pleasure-induced haze, you watched as Kai continued pounding into you. A raw moan that sounded almost like a whine tore through his throat, accompanied by a final thrust of his hips. He came inside you, thick, hot spurts of come filling your womb as a string of indiscernible curses tumbled past his lips.
Panting heavily, he lowered his head to rest his chin on your shoulder, ragged breaths hitting your skin as he waited for any residual spasms to abate.
A film of sweat coated his forehead, and his hair clung to his face. Juxtaposing with the brutal way he had been fucking you only seconds ago, Kai brushed his thumb against your cheekbone, lips pressing softly against your forehead before he pulled out with a satisfied groan.
———
“Shit,” you muttered under your breath, heart pounding in your chest as you pulled on your panties.
“There are cameras everywhere, I’m gonna get in so much trouble for this-”
“Don't worry,” his voice was surprisingly calm.
“I’ll take care of it later.” Instead of heading towards the neon green exit sign as you’d expected, Kai made a beeline towards one of the supply rooms, you trailing behind with growing confusion.
It struck you as odd how familiar he seemed with the layout, as if he had been there many times before.
“Hey, what are you—” you began, but the rest of your words caught in your throat the moment he pushed open the door.
There, tied up in a chair was none other than your cheat of an ex-boyfriend. Alex’s eyes widened in recognition as he spotted you, and he began thrashing wildly, his muffled screams stifled by the duct tape stretched across his mouth. As if things weren’t confusing and fucked up already, your friend emerged from the back of the small room.
“He wouldn’t stop screaming, sorry,” Lena explained, reaching out and pinching his cheek. Another girl, her long, bleached blonde hair peeking out from under a black beanie hat, caught your attention. With a casual nudge of her toe, she pushed aside some spare rope before shooting a flinty stare at Kai through long eyelashes.
“Took you long enough,”
“Hey, since when am I not allowed to have fun?”
Kai’s combat boots echoed against the linoleum floor as he strode towards where your ex was being tied up. His expression was unreadable as he leaned in closer, their faces just inches apart. As if in a trance, you found yourself drawn towards Kai, anticipation and adrenaline pumping through your veins as you relished the delicious fear emanating from Alex. You watched as Kai reached for something from his pocket—a glint of metal catching light. A switchblade.
“Vengeance is in my heart, death in my hand,”
He murmured in a low, almost sultry whisper, toying with the blade between his fingers.
“-blood and revenge are hammering in my head.” You finished softly.
“Titus Andronicus, right?” you smiled back. Kai’s expression morphed into one of sadistic pride, a devilish grin spreading across his face as he nodded slowly. The blonde girl groaned quietly in the background, “Another Shakespeare nerd,”
“Give me your hand,” You immediately complied, reaching out your hand.
“No, no. Palm up,”
Kai corrected gently, and you adjusted accordingly. His calloused, much larger hand enveloped yours. Still holding your hand, he lifted it to his lips and pressed a kiss on your knuckles. The gesture was strangely intimate, and it made your stomach flutter with warmth.
“Are you ready?”
You nodded.
“Good girl,”
He smiled at you, then you felt the weight of the knife handle being pressed into your open palm.
“You know exactly what you have to do, don’t you?”
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ash5monster01 · 20 hours
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Turnstiles
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Chapter Four - I’ve Loved These Days 🎶
Pairing: Steve Harrington x FemReader
Warnings: fluff, language, mentions of childhood trauma, mentions of death, abandonment issues, slight sadness.
Summary: You and Steve get your first place together and even if it isn’t glamorous, it’s good enough for the both of you as you leave the old days behind.
word count: 2.6k
Three ←→ Five
Masterlist
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Summer 1988
We hide our hearts from harder times
There were so many boxes. It seemed to be a never ending pile from the back of the moving truck, one neither of you could really afford but needed. Even with Dustin and Robin helping carry each new box in, it seemed every time you returned to the truck there was just as many if not more. You couldn’t help the soft sigh that escaped your lips as you looked at the very daunting pile that you knew would take you more than likely a month to finally put all in place.
“Don’t tell me we’re giving up already” that familiar sultry voice whispered in your ear, arms snaking around your waist from behind.
“Not giving up, just trying to gain the courage” you tell him, a small smirk tugging at the corners of your lips. You knew as much as Steve would try to help he would also play with everything he unpacked before actually putting it away, making the process much longer than it needed to be.
“It’s not that bad” Steve said with a soft shake of his head, small tufts of hair falling loose from the action.
“Yes it is, you packed every trophy you have ever earned in your entire life” you tell him, pointing to the large box labeled ‘Steve’s Achievements’.
“Hey I earned those, I can’t just throw them out” Steve pouts as you break out of his arms, doing your best attempt at climbing up into the truck to grab another box.
“I know handsome, I just have to tease” you say leaning down and he’s happy to bring his pouty lips to yours and leave a quick kiss. As much as you teased, you had felt bad. When Steve announced to his parents you were officially getting a place together they decided to put the house up for sale since they were never there anyways. As much as Steve didn’t have a great childhood it was still the only home he had ever known. You knew it took a toll on him and forced him to pack every single one of his belongings instead of the necessities.
“Hey dingus, why are we the only ones carrying shit?” Robin called out as she stepped out the doors of the small apartment, spotting you juggling a new box while Steve lingered at the back of the truck.
“I need my rest Robin, if Rosy’s shit wasn’t so heavy” he called back and you shot him a quick glare which made him laugh softly.
“You’re an idiot” Robin mumbled as you handed her the box in your arms and picked up a new one.
“What the hell Steve! Why are the girls the only one’s carrying your shit?” Dustin called out, exiting the home as well and you and Robin quickly erupt in giggles as Steve groans out.
“I don’t have a box in my arms for two seconds and I get harassed. What the hell is this?” Steve says mostly to himself, jumping up into the truck much easier than you did and you watch as he goes for one of the small boxes.
“Uh-uh mister. You’re bringing that one in” you say, nodding your head to the trophy box and Steve rolls his eyes before doing what he was told.
“God you’re so whipped” Robin snorts before starting back for the apartment ready to unload the boxes as fast as she can.
“I’m not whipped!” he called out quickly in defense but Dustin just laughed and grabbed a box for himself.
“It’s okay Stevie, you’re allowed to be whipped. I definitely am for you” you tell him sweetly and he grins, the oddly large trophy box now in his arms.
“I love you” he hums out, leaning and pressing a chaste kiss to your lips before hopping out of the truck. Your heart flutters due to the sentiment, never getting tired of the words he finally spoke a year and a half ago. Well actually wrote but ever since then he told you every chance he got and you loved it every time.
It had been over three years since you met Steve Harrington and you were pretty sure you’d never get tired of him. He came to you when you needed him most and you did the same for him. Since that day you hadn’t spent a day apart and making this decision, deciding to live together, after years of working and saving money, you had no regrets at all. This was it, he was your soulmate and this was only the beginning of a lifetime of years ahead. Small apartment or not, he was yours and that alone was a breath of relief.
“Need an invitation?” Robin called to you from the small house and you just chuckled before grabbing your things and making your way to the house. A house that would probably hold you and Steve for another few years, be your shelter from the storm, and despite its empty walls and bare floors, you couldn’t wait to make it a home.
It’s dusk by the time all the boxes are unloaded into your home and Robin and Dustin are long gone. Just looking at the mess you know you’re too tired to face it until tomorrow, so you make do with what you have. You make quick work of making a bed of the mattress on the floor, saving the frame building for tomorrow. When it looks decent enough to sleep on you make your way out of your room to find Steve. Much to your surprise he’s in the living room, boxes now cleared off the coffee table, and take out from the local diner on the table.
“I made dinner” he grins at you, sitting on the ground as he pours you a glass of wine in a mug. You giggle at the thought of it being the only thing he could find and join him on the floor.
“What’s this for?” you curiously ask, taking the mug from his hand and smiling at the food and candle he had set up.
“This is to taking our time. The last few years have felt like a race to the finish line and we finally made it” he says, recalling all the long hours and savings account expenses. Had it not been for the alternator going in Steve’s BMW you would’ve been here much sooner but at least you were here.
“Cheers to that” you say, clinking the mug against his own before taking a sip. Steve just smiles and looks to the simple plate of food. He loved that you both could live your lives so nonchalant, spend your nights living a luxurious lifestyle even if it’s just a small apartment.
“The money comes, the money goes, but we finally made it baby” he tells you and you quickly kiss him before grabbing the wrapped burger that your stomach grumbles for. Not realizing how hungry you were after a whole day of moving.
His words wash a sense of comfort over you. Knowing now you could spend your days a bit more relaxed, eat dinner in silk robes and light lamps for atmosphere. Even if the apartment was a passing phase in the start of the rest of your life you were both going long. Hanging hopes on chandeliers while gaining weight and sleeping in late. You had loved those days before living together but it was time to change your ways and love these new days. The days meant for just the two of you before something more comes along, something bigger.
“Did your parents say when they’re selling the house?” you ask around a bite of your burger, trying to get a better read on him and how he feels.
“By the end of the month, Dad says if I need anything to get it by then” he mutters, heart clenching over the fact. He hated that empty house, despised it, but these last few years it wasn’t really empty.
“I’m sorry honey” you tell him, wiping your face with a napkin and he shrugs.
“It’s okay, I was meant to move out sometime. Just wish it was still somewhat mine, you know? They were never there so much it sorta always felt like it did. Then when I started spending time with the kids and you there, I guess I just always imagined I’d stay there, raise my kids, teach em how to swim in the pool and how to ride their bike in the driveway. Make it more of a home then it ever was to me” Steve explains, eyes cast over the table and lost in a memory that hadn’t happened yet. Your heart instantly softens to the boy, hand reaching out to settle in his own just like you did when you first met.
“I’m sorry Stevie, but just think about how we can make those memories in our own home. A home we’ll grow old in and our kids can visit whenever and bring their kids with them” you tell him and Steve can’t help the small grin that cracks along his face at the sentiment.
“Is this you saying it’s you and I forever Rosy?” he inquires, devious eyes glimmering into your own and you laugh, cheeks flushing red.
“Well I’d say moving in together kinda deals the deal” you tell him and Steve grins before reaching over to grab your waist. Much to your surprise he lifts you effortlessly over and into his lap where his face nuzzles into your neck.
“Then it’s you and me forever, I promise” he tells you, warm breath tickling your skin. Now you both could indulge in things refined and hide your hearts from the harder times.
This marked the start of drowning your doubts in dry champagne and dreaming of your future. A future that if you dreamed hard enough could include real pearls, foreign cars, caviar and cabernet wine. Yet the real riches was a future with each other, a future that included kids and endless memories to be shared. You didn’t really care if you only ever lived in this apartment, the boy curled up next to you was the real dream.
“Another toast” you say, reaching for your mug and handing Steve his own. He follows right along, the bright red liquid sloshing up the side. This was something you wanted to say before the old versions of yourself end and the new ones begin.
“A toast to how it’s been and to all the new things we get to love. Including each other” you say and Steve happily clinks the mug against your own as you both tip back the sweet wine since Steve hated dry.
“I’ve loved these days and I’ll love the new ones too” Steve mutters into your neck and you smile and settle against him, finally relishing in the fact you were both sat in your shared living room. A space you and Steve could share while you got big wig jobs and engaged. A space designed for the both of you to grow as a couple who was meant to last forever.
“You think we’ll get tired of each other?” you voice your worries, knowing now that you shared such close quarters you were bound to find flaws within one another.
“Maybe but I’ll always love you more, and isn’t that how it’s supposed to work?” he asks, voice a soft hum into the late night of the barren home. You had a lot of work ahead of you but at this very moment you couldn’t bring yourself to care.
“I guess so” you smile, a softness twisting in your gut at how in love you are with this man beside you.
“Wait! I have an idea!” Steve suddenly says, sliding you delicately off his lap and to the ground. He’s up in a second, eyeing the labels of each of the boxes in search of something you’re not sure of. You watch with curiosity, waiting to see what the boy could possibly be up to now.
“Ah-ha!” he lets out once he finds what his looking for, large hands pulling back the folded cardboard pieces and digging inside. It’s when the familiar flash of silver is revealed you realize he’s in search of his boombox.
Finding the outlet Steve makes work of prepping the stereo for some mood music. It’s no surprise when the familiar flash of a Billy Joel album is pulled from the bottom of the box. He grumbled only slightly when he realized he needs to rewind the tape, smashing the button with an annoyed scowl. Yet when the tape finally spins back to the beginning, a grin covers his lips instead, as a familiar song starts to fill the room. Say Goodbye to Hollywood, the classic beginning of Billy’s 1976 album Turnstiles. A true testament to his talent, and one of Steve’s favorites.
“Dance with me?” he asks, hand held down to you on the ground and you don’t even hesitate to clasp your own with his, allowing him to lift you up and into his arms before spinning you around the room.
“Tell me something good?” you ask him, heart thumping softly against his own as you both sway around the living room, the barren walls soon to hold a lifetime of memories.
“The first time I heard this song I was spending the night at my Grandparents. I was nine and we were all in the kitchen making cookies. I remember my Grandma smelling like fresh flowers and the way my Grandpas laugh made you feel safe. Turnstiles had just come out, Billy’s latest album and Grandpa knew I hadn’t heard it yet. So he played the vinyl while I frosted cookies and this song began to play. Now every time I hear it I’m back in that kitchen just happy to have two people who really loved me” Steve says, a soft sadness cast over his eyes and you can’t stop yourself from pulling him close and leaving a soft kiss on his lips.
“I really would’ve liked to meet them” you whisper, hand curling at the back of his neck and fingers grazing the small tufts of hair there. He smiles and gives a soft squeeze to your waist, pulling you impossibly closer.
“They would’ve loved you. My Grandpa would point out how smart you are, tease me about it too. Ask how I got a girl like you to date a doofus like me. And my Grandma, she would bake you pies and insist on sewing all your clothes when they got old and worn. Talk about how much she wished she had a granddaughter” Steve says like he knows and it’s because he does. They were the two people in his life who always made him feel safe and he knew them better than anyone. It sucked they weren’t here but knowing how much they would’ve loved you is comfort enough.
“I see them in you. In the way you take care of the kids and in the way you love me” you say and the look he gives you is different than any look you have ever received. Your heart accelerates just at the sight and before you can even process it the boy is kissing you like his life depends on it.
“I’m going to love these days too” he suddenly says, pulling back from the kiss a little breathless. A small laugh escapes your lips as he hugs you close.
“Yeah, well I count on having many of them”
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nope-body · 1 year
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milflewis · 2 months
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#in a strange place today and i need to put this somewhere. i do not have a journal yet. this is it#my grandad was diagnosed with dementia years ago and the grandad i have now is often unrecognisable from the one i grew up with#and while this like isn’t fun and it is strange for him to look at me and not know me more times than he does. it has also been kind of l#lovely?#bc he thinks my granny is still alive so whenever i get to go see him i get to pretend she is too. and she is for a minute. and tho i am#glad she went before him. it is nice to say oh i’m popping in to see her after this grandad and talk about her like she’s hasn’t been gone#since i’ve been ten. my dad has spoken more to him in the last five years than he has his whole life#he was not an easy man. he was loud and friendly and hard working and funny and scary but not easy. in ways he is even#harder now. in others he is easier.#he is more of a child. this is what dementia can do to a brain. we are learning things about his childhood that no one alive has ever spoken#about. that no one knew. my dad doesn’t love him more now but he understands him better#my grandad taught me how to drive a tractor and how to fish through my dad and he has not recognised me in over a year and he#hasn’t walked since he broke his pelvis seven years ago and his muscles are nearly all gone. he is a fraction of the size he used to be. his#personality and body took up my childhood like adults on the screen in cartoons. he hasn’t dressed himself in a decade. he told one of the#nurses that after dinner he wanted ice cream plain like herself and nearly peed when she laughed and told him to fuck off#he is in there. he is himself. i know him. but he isn’t. he doesn’t know me but he allows me to tell him how to ppl he knows are doing. he#still somehow trusts me. we talk a lot about my granny and how she stayed up watching tv again last night so she’s tired today. don’t stay#long when you call in to see her?#whenever we would journey to see him and my granny and get in v late he’d ask us if we wanted apple tart and my granny would say michael.#not ur kids. u can’t parent them. he didn’t know my name yesterday but he asked me if i wanted apple tart#i hope he dies soon. for all that i will miss this. miss my dad having this. he would not want to live like this. it wouldntbe living to him
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tiredsadpeach · 1 year
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The urge to isolate and only talk to my family, my bf, and one other friend lmao
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hellfireeddiemunson · 7 months
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i have bad melted soup brain today and i hate it
#i have never really felt like just disappearing off of the face of the earth and not talking to Anyone before but i have been thinking of it#a lot today! which is wild bc not my normal isolation thought but today it seems good ahahahaha#i am just. tired. i feel like i am not listened to ever and i feel unwanted as hell lately which i know in the back of my mind i am not#unwanted but boy do it feel like that lately lol. and i’ve been back on my ‘im gonna die alone bc nobody ever will love me how i love them’#bullshit which i have Not missed but it is come back full on ! soooo fun for me hahahahahaha i love to feel miserable about being unwanted#by those around me!!!! love it sooooooooooo much weeeeeee i totally don’t wanna slam my head through a window!!!!#also just in general lately i have felt like people talking to me is a chore to them bc nobody around me has been having actual conversation#it’s all been shit ass one word or one sentence replies from everyone or they talk about what they want and not acknowledge what i said and#i don’t even know what to do about it. i just don’t even want to talk to anyone now bc i feel like they literally don’t want to speak to me#and they don’t care what i have to say clearly bc they don’t pay attention and then bring up what i said says or weeks later like i never#said anything and it’s like hm wow yeah i fucking told you about that??? maybe if you pay attention you’d have known that but it’s fine !!!!#I’m just. tired of it. i am fully understanding of everyone having lives and doing their own things they need to do. but this is like. fr#different. like it feels so much different than that and i don’t get it and i don’t know what to do !!!!!!! i feel like i’m going Nuts#anyways if any of you wanna stick me through a meat grinder i would be forever thankful and you have the rights to take anything i own after#what this boils down to is my autistic ass is like everyone is not doing their normal thing!!! everyone is off their normal talking schedule#with me!!!! this must mean they fucking want me dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bc they went off script/pattern and not in a way they have in the past#that indicated that they just are struggling to reach out! this is different and bad and they want you out of their life!!!!!!!#which is ridiculous but what the fuck am i to do about it bc i will be thinking this until i basically am told otherwise by these people. so#that’s soooo much fun i love brains they’re so silly i wish i could jump at a wall and stick to it until i just slowly peel off and onto the#floor. anyways. hope everyone else has a good night
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kentopedia · 3 months
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nanami kento, who hates dating, and didn’t do much of it in his early twenties. but now, he’s almost thirty, watching all the people he works with settle down, have kids, and he thinks he wants that. so he might as well try.
so satoru sets him up on a few dates — friends of friends, he calls them. and at the end of every one of the dinners, kento goes home empty, exhausted, because he knows what they want is not the same.
still; he thinks maybe he’s being a little self-destructive, maybe too picky, maybe he just got so used to being alone. with satoru’s insistence, he gives all the women another call, invites them over to his apartment.
the first time was a disaster… kento had barely set the dinner on the table before his cat had hissed at her, scratched her down the arm in a thin gash. and though it did draw blood, it was hardly enough to warrant that reaction.
he didn’t even try to stop her as she picked up her bag and left, huffing like she’d been morally offend. kento, though, could only smile to himself in amusement.
because maybe kento was a poor judge of character, a man who was secretly hoping nothing would pan out — but his cat could certainly tell the good from the bad.
it became a little game to him, after that. seeing if anyone could win his pet over, and if they could, perhaps they were the one. his darling animal was a fickle thing anyway. a bit too defensive, quick to bite anything threatening after years on the streets.
naturally, no one came back twice.
he was close to giving up, accepting his solitude because he was tired of empty conversations over dinner. but then, he ventured out over the weekend to a new coffee shop, during hours he normally didn’t spend out of his home, and met you.
though you only talked for a moment, kento felt like maybe he’d known you in a past life. a part of him thought maybe it was strange, the way he kept coming back to talk to you, catching you at the end of your shift to see if you wanted to grab a coffee sometime.
by the second date, kento started to think you could turn out to be his best friend.
by the third date, kento wondered if soulmates were real.
on the fourth date, almost two months later, an appropriate time to get to know someone when you were as reserved as kento, he invited you over for dinner. it was, perhaps, the final confirmation he needed to let himself be with you.
he let you through the door, smiling softly as you told him about the book you were reading, and hung his coat on the rack. a moment later, you stopped, distracted, hands covering your mouth in a gasp.
“kento! she’s the cutest cat i’ve ever seen, you didn’t even show me pictures!” you exclaim, and, a few feet away, crouched down. “look at her pretty eyes…”
“careful,” kento said, “she’s not very—“
but the cat approached your outstretched hand, sniffed once, before letting you scratch her under her chin, purring loud enough for kento to hear across the room.
“shes such a sweetheart, you told me she was mean!” you smiled, making a cooing noise as you threaded your fingers through her fur. “kento’s a liar, isn’t he… you’re so precious.”
a few moments later, she snapped her jaw at you in a biting motion, and you only laughed, withdrawing your hand. “alright, i get it, i won’t bother you anymore.”
though she still brushed against your legs, just as she did kento’s, and seemed to communicate some sort of message to him.
“do you want any help cooking?” you ask, tucking your hair behind your ears. “i’m a disaster in the kitchen, but—“
“sure,” kento said, his chest tightening as he blinked back at you, only in his apartment for minutes and already looking as at home there. he wondered if it was possible to fall in love so quickly. “but only if you want to.”
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bitchdafuqyousay · 10 months
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#i feel like shit omg i was so sick the other day got a two day period of being fine n now im so awful#i’ve been out of bed for like 3-4hrs mx today n not all at once#most of it i’ve been asleep too idek what’s wrong like the other day it was throwing up general nausea n aches n whatnot#but today im in pain all over i can’t regulate my temperature for shit like im freezing in my room in bed under all my blankets but the#second i go anywhere else im dying of heat! like instant sweating dizziness n so hot i get pins n needles in my cheeks n extremities n my#breath gets short n it’s so fuckin hot i gotta retreat to my room after twenty min cause it’s fuckin painful but then im back up here n im#so cold n if im not lying down i get stupid dizzy n my balance is all off even just sitting down but standing is absolute ass like im like#too tall today? i feel too tall like standing up n my eye distance to the ground makes me feel lightheaded n i start pitching forwards like#the way you might when looking over a high balcony- the sort of vertigo that comes from height i’m getting from just feckin standing up in#my own goddamn body?? fuckin madness innit?? is this a blood pressure thing?? fucks going on i genuinely don’t know#n it all hurts n i’m in bed rn after having a shower n i felt better in the shower but i’m back out#told my dad sister n brother goodnight picked up my dog n went upstairs n like i had to put my baby down once i got to the room i couldn’t#make it with him to the bed he’s only 6lbs but my arms felt like they’d fall off n the tiny amount of body heat from him on my chest made me#get short of breath n feel way too overheated i’ve never had that happen before i’ve never had to put him on the floor n he walk over n hop#up himself n i had to take a seat i had to sit on the floor for a minute to collect myself#i closer the door n turned off the lights on my knees i was crawling about n had to drag myself up into bed cause i just was too tired to#get up n do it all normally genuinely wtf is happening
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emmyrosee · 6 months
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Geto doesn’t know how to respond to pet names.
It took him a long enough time to become used to the traditional “baby” and “love,” it was just recently when you started busting out these absurd nicknames for whatever thing you could be subjecting him too.
You were cooking once, and you called him “scnhookums” and asked him to pass the peppers. He dropped the tray.
Driving, you told your “stinky man” to take a left. He slammed on his brakes.
You’d been painting his nails and got some on his cuticle, and you asked your “little poop” to pass you some acetone. He just took his hands away.
It’s not that he doesn’t… like them, they’re just not quite what he expects. They’re so extreme, so left field that in a way, he feels as if you’re mocking him, making fun of him.
He doesn’t like that feeling.
But what he hates even more, is when you pause on giving him disgustingly sweet pet names. This, makes him feel like you no longer care, no longer wanting to take the time to come up with the gushy names that keep him in a shy state.
And you haven’t given him one in days.
He hasn’t been able to sleep. Nothing major, nightmares plaguing the dreams he thinks should be pleasant, 
“Shhh,” you soothe. “Stay asleep. I’ve got you.”
He merely nods and lets his head bury back into the pillows, your lips press against his temple before he lets his breathing even out once again.
As if your kiss soothed the monsters that dance, he’s able to sleep a few more hours, waking up disgustingly late and pouting to find your side of the bed cold.
He’s not proud of the pout okay, you’re just really good at scratching the affectionate itch that digs his brain. all he wants is his ‘pooky bear’ to cuddle their little ‘chickadee’ and let him fall back asleep in their arms.
He’s sure those names aren’t far in your arsenal of names.
When he finally does come to search you out, he’s not completely surprised to see you, stretched out on the couch and in a state of relaxation he finds envy in.
“What’re you watching?” He asks, shuffling into the living room. You smile up at him and say nothing, but instead pat your lap as an invitation for him to come and curl against you.
With a nod, he does just that, letting himself lay down on the couch with you, his head nestled in your thighs. Your fingers instantly start their magic on carding his loose hair, and his eyes slack slightly at the tingly feeling.
“Feel better?” You ask, and he hums contently. “I told you more sleep would help. You just never listen to me.”
He says nothing, merely letting his fingers gently trace the lines on your kneecap.
There’s a whirl of silence in the room, and he feels his eyes grow tired from your loving touch, the post warmth of his shower, and the cat that’s curled on his feet, keeping them warm under her rhythmic breathing.
“My handsome man,” you mumble, bending down to plant a kiss at his temple. his eyes widen as he cranes his head up to look at you, curved in surprise and a glimmer of love in his dark pools. “So pretty it hurts… my handsome, pretty man.”
That. That, he could get used to.
He smiles dopily and turns his head to nuzzle into your thigh, trying to hide the heating of his cheeks from you and your potential teasing by keeping his face buried.
But you don’t pick on him. Instead, you click your tongue adoringly and press another kiss to his temple. He feels your nose taking deep breaths of his scent, and your thumb strokes his cheek lovingly.
“Shut up”, Suguru says happily, as an acceptance, letting his sleepy eyes close and allowing your affections to swallow him whole.
Yes, he thinks to himself. It’s the fluttery feeling everyone talks about. The air filling his lungs and his head skipping beats just by the tone of which you call him handsome.
You call him your man.
Maybe pet names don’t always have to be sticky and sweet; but it just makes the most meaningful ones penetrate his heart that much more.
And this pet name, he hopes you decide to keep.
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explicit-tae · 6 months
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Ungodly Hour: Day 1
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You and Jungkook are together for the whole weekend. All he truly wanted from you was to admit you were his girl - but like always, he had to fuck it out of you. @swga-ficrecs @rrrapmonste-rr @xtrataerrestrial @bangctans @danielle143 @taekritimin123 @thelilbutifulthings @jksjx
Series Masterlist
word count: 3.675
warning: dirty talk, nipple sucking, slight kissing, neck biting, edging, face-slapping, cocky/jealous/possessive/dominant jungkook, bitchy/shit-talking but submissive reader, creampie, crying, begging,
“You cooked this?” your mother is first to ask once she bites into the meat, eyes growing slightly wide. “It tastes amazing.”
Jungkook gives a toothy grin and nods. “I added a secret sauce that my father has taught me.” 
You want to roll your eyes at Jungkook.
Dinner was going by smoothly. Around 20 minutes ago, your parents arrived. Your father appeared much the same, nonchalant and just ready to eat. Your mother did most of the talking. Her eyes roamed the apartment with prying eyes. She asked Jungkook and you questions after questions, all of which Jungkook responded to quickly and without hesitation. 
“How did you two really meet?” your mother asks after a moment. “I assume it couldn’t have been tweeter.”
You scoff. “No. It was not twitter.”
Jungkook places a hand atop yours and laughs. He wraps his fingers into your own and eyes you. He then brings your hand up to his lips and places a gentle kiss. “We met at the University.” Jungkook nods. “She was so cold to me at first.”
Your mother shakes her head. “Typical of her.”
“I must’ve asked her out a million times. I was shut down each and every time. Right, baby?”
You want to snatch that smirk off of his lips, but you only roll your eyes. 
“I think she got tired of my begging and agreed to a date.” Jungkook turns to your mother. “Ever since then, I’ve been attached to her like a lost puppy.”
Your father listens, not interested in speaking, but interested enough to appear apart of the conversation. “I’m glad.” your mother speaks. She takes a sip of her water. “Y/N can be a little mean.”
You knit your brows, but before you can speak Jungkook cackles. “She can!” he agrees.
Oh wow, you think. 
“But that’s what I love about her. She’s feisty and stubborn.” Jungkook looks your way, his eyes burning into you. You glance away from them and grunt, feeling hot. “And she always speaks up for me at restaurants when they get my order wrong.”
“That was once.” you quip. “You asked for extra sauce…”
“I did.” Jungkook nods. “I thought she was going to rip someone’s head off.” he tells your mother jokingly. “At least I know she cares.”
Jungkook was right - he had won over your mother.
That was expected, however. Your mother was easy to please. Jungkook was the equivalent of tall, dark and handsome. He’s easy to speak with and was such a smooth talker that it even had her swooning. He was affectionate, often kissing your hand or your head - more than usual, but you told yourself he was milking this to the very end. 
Now, your father was a different story. He was able to engage the man into conversation and actually hold it, having your fathers full and undivided attention. That is when you realized that Jungkook meant what he said - that even if this fake dating didn’t end with the both of you actually dating, that Jungkook would be there regardless. Your mother was already inviting him to dinner the following week and even hugged him before leaving - before she hugged you. 
“I’ll see you two next week?” your mother asks as she’s strolling out the door.
Jungkook wraps you in a tight embrace, his head resting on your shoulder. “You will!” he responds to her, waving curtly. “Y/N tells me about your cooking all the time. I can’t wait!”
You grumble - it was all the time, but you weren’t aware Jungkook was actually listening to your random ramblings. He was slowly winning your mother over that you were sure she would have him for dinner even without you there.
“You think you’re cute?” you push Jungkook off of you once the door is shut. 
“Is that the thanks I get for making a good impression?”
You cross your arms. “You know what you were doing complimenting her the entire night.”
Jungkook smirks. “Like mother, like daughter. You both like my praises.” Jungkook’s hands are on you again, bringing you closer to him. “I have to keep myself on top if I’m going to be competing against these boyfriends.”
Your hands are against his chest to push him away. “Ugh, take me home.”
“You aren’t staying the weekend?” Jungkook pouts his lips slightly. “We have to finish binge watching Law & Order.”
“You’re right.” you sigh for a moment. “And here I thought I had a chance to get rid of you.”
“You never can.” Jungkook’s right hand slaps your ass. You yelp, but it was only a gesture to bring you closer to him. He pecks your lips. “Let’s get going. We have the entire weekend ahead of us.”
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The night shouldn’t have ended like this. You told yourself that you and Jungkook wouldn’t be entangled together - especially since you were watching Law & Order - there was no way Jungkook could ignore such an amazing series to get his cock wet.
But Jungkook had. 
It started with light touching. Jungkook’s bed is soft and it’s easy to be comfortable. He had gave you a shirt to wear - even if you had a weekend's worth of clothes - he insisted it would be best. You were certain he just wanted you in his shirt to appear more domesticated. 
Your first mistake was not wearing anything but the shirt and panties. Jungkook’s hands wandered upon your skin, his body dangerously close to yours. His hips would rut against your ass, prying hand going beneath the oversized shirt. “Just one kiss, Y/N. Don’t be like that.” was what he said - and you caved.
Of course it could never be one kiss. One peck led to him begging for more - and more. It led to him flipping you to face him, his hand squeezing the flesh of your ass to bring you closer to him. It continued with you being on top of him, tongues fighting against one another. His hands stayed upon your ass, rubbing gently as you and he kissed.
“We’re missing the show.” you protest, breaking free of the heated kiss. 
“We can always go back.” Jungkook eyes you with hooded eyes. “You look so pretty in my shirt.” he murmurs.
“Shut up, simp.” you roll your eyes jokingly.
“I can never compliment my girl without getting called a simp.” Jungkook tsks. His hands rub up your rib back down to your waist to your thighs. “It’s true, though. I wanna wake up with you like this every day.”
“I would have to actually be your girl for that to happen.” you retort. You gently grind against him, lips flashing him a mischievous grin. 
“You are my girl.” Jungkook hisses low, hands squeezing your hips to keep you firmly against him. “I got you in my shirt, don’t I?”
Jungkook and his logical comebacks. Damn him.
“I got you to stay with me this weekend, right?” Jungkook continues, his tongue coating his lips with moisture. 
“So?”
Jungkook manages to lift himself up without disrupting you. You and he are face to face now, your thighs caging him in between you. 
“So that makes you my girl.” Jungkook pecks your lips. “I know you like being called my girl, Y/N. Each time I say it you grind against me a little harder.”
Truly, fuck Jeon Jungkook because damn was he right.
“Exactly.” Jungkook murmurs, and for a second you believe he’s going to say something else - a comment that would indicate just how “down bad” you were for him. But no, Jungkook continues to stare at you.
You shift in his lap and with that, Jungkook blinks. “You’re really pretty.” 
You frown, knitting your brows together in an attempt to be annoyed - even if your heart did jolt. 
“My pretty girl.” Jungkook continues, his arms embracing you. “Far too stubborn to admit.”
“Is this how you ask out all your girls?” you snort, but feel yourself melting in his warm embrace. “Just demand for them to be with you?”
“There you go, Y/N.” Jungkook chuckles. “You go in that head of yours and start being delusional and fantasize me being with other girls.”
“Excuse me?” Delusional?
“Why are you adamant on me having multiple girls?” Jungkook gently kisses your forehead just because he knows it annoys you - his random acts of affection or kindness in a situation that is deemed “serious”.
You shrug your shoulders. “You fit the fuck boy aesthetic.” was all you say.
Jungkook snorts. “You think I have girls lining up to suck my dick in exchange for streaming services?”
You gasp. “We said we wouldn’t bring that up!” you hiss. 
“You’re right, baby. I’m sorry.” Jungkook smiles. “I just don’t see how you think I’m a fuck boy even now. I barked in order to meet your parents. I’m still getting laughed at in the groupchat.”
You suppress your own laughter, only giving Jungkook a grin.
“I basically fund your whole lifestyle. I think that’s far beyond a fuck boy.” Jungkook adds - but not in a way to throw it in your face or to appear as though you need him to. 
“A sugar daddy at best.” you shrug, but even you can’t help but laugh at the bewildered look on Jungkook’s face. “You do know you aren’t obligated to buy me things.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes - it was the same song and dance as before. He’d get you something he heard you speak about once a few days prior - you would insist it wasn’t a need, but the sparkle in your eyes was enough for him to keep doing it. 
“As my girl…” Jungkook places a kiss at the nape of your neck. “...it’s required of me to.”
“Until you get bored and throw me to the side.” you feel Jungkook’s teeth bite down on your neck. 
“You do everything but admit you like me, baby.” Jungkook presses you firmly against him. “I’m beginning to think that’s what you want me to do so you can remain in denial.”
Jungkook’s hands go beneath the large shirt of his you wore. Your skin is so soft and smooth - the both of you shudder. 
“You’re okay.” you murmur, biting your lip when you feel both of his hands engulf your breasts. 
“Just okay?” Jungkook’s tongue twirls on the spot he bit. “I can have you on your back begging for me in seconds, baby. Nothing about me is ‘just okay’.”
Your play hard to get was not going to last - especially not now. The cocky Jungkook was creeping in, and he knew that your words were nothing but bluffs.
“I’m sure I would be the same way with someone else.”
You couldn’t help it. It was a game for you at times to rile up Jungkook. He was the jealousy and competitive type - he had to prove that he was the best at any and everything he did. 
“You want me to fuck you so bad.” Jungkook chuckles, but you can hear the slight irritation in his voice - deep and raspy; ready to prove you wrong. You shudder slightly as goosebumps ride across your skin.
You really did. You were already wet enough, his hands and mouth adding to it. There was nothing like Jungkook fucking your petty words right out of you.
“You do this every time, Y/N.” Jungkook bites your neck harshly and you yelp, squirming. “You love messing with me. It must turn you on seeing me fuck the submission into you.”
You swallow thickly to suppress a moan. “I just give you what you want.” you shrug slightly. 
“What do I want?”
“Someone to moan for you no matter if it feels good or not.”
You were playing a dangerous game with Jungkook, but it just brings nothing but excitement through you. 
You yelp once more when you feel your hair being yanked. “You’re being a bitch again, baby.” Jungkook murmurs, but even he is amused by your attempts. You can never just tell him that you want him - never tell him that you want him to dominate. Instead, you deny or insinuate the opposite just to give him a reason to prove you wrong.
But Jungkook said it once before, he loved your ‘play hard to get’ game you played with him; when he had you it was much more satisfying. 
“Isn’t that what you like about me?” you tease, and even in the dim room - law and order playing ignored in the background - you are beautiful to him, eyes sparkling with mischief. 
“Love it.” Jungkook presses his lips firmly onto yours, his tongue sliding past your mouth. It’s quick and he’s rough, but you cannot protest. His hands are gripping your flesh so hard that you feel as though they’d leave a mark.
Jungkook yanks the shirt off of you, tongue instantly finding both of your breasts. Your legs are wrapped around him, his clothed cock pressing firmly against you.
“Why can’t you be normal?” Jungkook’s lips pops from your nipples, his tongue licking it furiously. “A normal girl would just tell me she wants me to be a little rough and not provoke it out of me.”
Jungkook grips both of your breasts into the palm of his hands and brings both of your nipples into his mouth.Your back arches at the warm sensation pooling through you. 
“I-I have to tell you how to fuck like a man?”
There was a new sensation when the words left your mouth and hit Jungkook’s ears. It’s a sensation that shoots straight to your core and leaves your cheek stinging.
The room is silent, Jungkook’s eyes wide watching your reaction for a moment. He’s ready to apologize for not thinking before he slaps you, but it’s your moan that draws him back to reality.
“You liked that?” Jungkook murmurs and you nod, biting your lip. Jungkook grunts, his mind wandering just how far you’d let him go.
Jungkook unwraps your legs from around him and removes himself from the bed. He drags you to the edge of it, you yelping at the sudden movement. Jungkook removes your panties and widens your legs. He’s cocky - through the flashing television light, he see’s how wet you are for him.
“Keep your eyes on me.” Jungkook demands.
You swallow, finding it difficult underneath his intense gaze. Jungkook lowers himself, burying his tongue deep within your folds. He forces your legs open each time you threaten to close them. His eyes are locked onto your fluttering ones, watching as you moan and cry for him. You were so beautiful for him - if only you’d allow him to admire your beauty. Oftentimes when he looked your way, you were quick to respond with a witty remark.
“Fuck…” you groan, breaking eye-contact just as he enters his fingers inside of you. You lay your head back and continue to pant. 
“You never allow me to treat you nicely.” Jungkook removes his tongue from your clit to spit on it, continuing his pumping. “If you’d let me, I would take good care of you.” Jungkook licks his lips, the wet sounds of your pussy like a melody to his ears. “But instead, you want to be a bitch. I don’t get it.”
“K-Kookie…” you draw out a moan, a hand cupping your breast. You can feel the familiar churning in your stomach. “I’m gonna cum-”
“No you aren’t.” Jungkook removes his fingers from inside of you, hand slapping your clit. 
Your eyes shoot open, your pussy clenching around nothing. “W-What-”
Your mouth is stuffed with Jungkook’s fingers, your tongue twirling around them. 
“See how good you taste?” Jungkook questions, removing his fingers to grip your chin tightly. “I would let you cum but…I’m sure you can always find someone else to do it. Since you enjoy faking so much.”
Your heart is pumping and you flush hot with embarrassment. You aren’t sure what to say - Jungkook had you beat. 
“Aw,” Jungkook chuckles. “You look so sad, baby. I can let you cum.”
You swallow, glancing away from Jungkook. 
“Is that what you want?”
You nod your head, but Jungkook wants to hear you. 
You yelp when your clit is slapped once more. “Use your words, baby.”
“Y-Yes!” you try not to moan and sound too desperate, but it’s inevitable. 
“Yes what, baby?” Jungkook’s already tugging his bottom half off, his underwear going along with it. His shirt is next, chisel abs in your line of vision that you groan at just the sight. “Tell me what you want, Y/N. You have a mouth any other time.”
Fuck Jeon Jungkook. 
Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his cocky attitude.
Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his amazing dick that has you following along with him. “Please fuck me.” you sigh in defeat. “Please make me cum, Kook.”
“With pleasure.” Jungkook is delighted. He slaps the top of his cock against your clit, licking his lips. “So wet. To think you said someone else can have you like this.”
Jungkook wasn’t going to let that go - you can only imagine how hard he was going to fuck-
“J-Jungkook…!” you shout in surprise at how hard he enters you, his thrusting increasing by the second. Your back slams against the bed with each thrust, and it only bounces back just as hard. 
“You can handle it, Y/N.” Jungkook hisses, fingernails digging into your flesh. “You don’t want me to be nice, you don’t want to be my girl…”
Your eyes roll to the back of your head, panting heavily. Jungkook’s tone appears serious - you’d have to ask later on if your words really got to him like they appeared to have. 
“I let you…fuck…” Jungkook’s head hangs, eyes unsure where to focus. Your breast bounced furiously in rhythm with his pounding. Your face is scrunched with pleasure, a bit of drool in the corner of your mouth. “...I let you sit on my face. I let you spend as much of my money as you’d like with no limit. I…”
Jungkook grips your chin once more, forcing you to focus on him. It’s difficult - Jungkook doesn’t allow you a second to breathe, but you don’t want him to. 
“And all I really ask you to be is my girl.”
It pains for him to remove himself from you - all he wants is to cum deep inside of you like you’d allow him before. But - his pride and ego got the best of him. If you were going to front as if you didn’t need him to cum, then you weren’t.
“Kook…” you cry in defeat, pussy once more clenching around nothing. 
Jungkook laughs, a dark glee in the tone. “And like I said before, Y/N…” your eyes flutter a bit looking at his face - dark lust filled eyes staring right into yours. “...I can have you on your back begging for me, can’t I?”
Fuck Jeon Jungkook.
Your chest heaves. “Fuck you.” you curse at how meek your voice appeared.
“I bet you’d like that baby.” Jungkook plays with your clit slightly. “You’re my girl, right?”
You lick your lips, thighs quivering. 
“Say it and I’ll let you cum.” Jungkook centers his tip at your entrance, thumb circling against your wet bud. “That’s all I want from you, baby. You can have anything you want from me…”
Jungkook enters you slowly this time. Your groan is long and deep, your hands reaching out to grab Jungkook’s bicep. 
“J-Jungkook.” you trail off - the pleasure now getting to you. You just wanted to cum by him - his hands, mouth, cock, whatever it took.
“Yes, baby?” Jungkook breathes - he’s unsure himself if he’d be able to last long like this and then his ego would be hurt (but then again, he wouldn’t have blueballs).
“Please make me cum, Kookie.” you wail, hot tears falling down your face. You had to look utterly pathetic weeping for dick. Jungkook’s ego was now going to skyrocket and this moment is something he would forever hold over your head - no jokes from you could ever be taken now. “I had you on your back crying for me, baby” - you can hear it now.
But - you were desperate. Jungkook was hot, his dick was amazing and you’d allow him to have this over you. 
“I’m your girl, Kookie.”
Jungkook shudders - and now he’s truly satisfied. He pounds into you sloppily, certain that neither of you were going to last long. You’re clenching around him so heavenly, moaning and crying his names that he cannot help but want to cum inside of you each and every time. 
“I know you’re close, baby.” you hear Jungkook say, his forehead - moist with sweat - pressed onto yours. “We can come together, okay?”
“Y-Yea…” you nod, but you wrap your arms around Jungkook and press your lips against his. You’re groaning against the kiss, already cumming on his cock.
Jungkook feels the electric shock go through him and he shudders. With a few more thrusts, Jungkook cums inside of you, trembling at the sensation.
Ten minutes it’s what it took for you and Jungkook to come back to reality. You’re sweaty and you haven’t even done anything.
“You wanna shower?” Jungkook’s voice pipes in. “Are you okay? I didn’t go too overboard, right?”
You nod your head. “I’m okay.” you murmur. 
Jungkook nods. He kisses your temple. “I can start the shower for you-”
“You aren’t coming?” you ask once you feel Jungkook shuffle on the bed.
“I-I..” Jungkook’s eyes are wide and doe like. He appears completely surprised that you offered such a thing. “You’d like me to?”
You laugh at his expression. How you manage to remove yourself from the bed is beyond you - your legs are shaking with pain that you’re not upset about. 
Jungkook feels your hands against his bare chest and he tilts his head, awaiting your response. “I said I was your girl, wasn’t I?” you murmur, sending a kiss to his chest.
In seconds, Jungkook is erect again at just the admission. 
Series Masterlist
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yxami · 4 months
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Yandere creep that craves your attention when you’re not near and across the classroom with others. Why can’t you just talk with him? He’s interesting right?
He hasn’t even gotten the opportunity to show you the poisonous flowers he sealed into a heart shape with silica gel. Just so it would never die and you wouldn’t get a reaction from it either.
He knew you didn’t like dead things like he did so he was really hoping this would make you happy.
He plays with the gift in his hands, trying to distract himself from looking up since it only hurt him more to see you laughing and smiling. Maybe you’d approach him when you got tired of those two.
“Hellooooo??” You say, sitting backwards in the seat pressed against his desk as you lean down to look at his solemn, now surprised face. “I’ve already said your name five times, what’s up?”
“Sor-sorry..!! I didn’t realize you were right there” He looks up, cheeks heating up from embarrassment that he hadn’t noticed you sooner. When did you even appear in-front of him? Where were your friends?
“Did you not sleep enough or something? You look less alive than usual” You bring his face close, using both of your thumbs to rub at his eyebags. “You need to sleep more”
“Ok-okay..” He tries not stumbling over his words as his pale cheeks darken even more, he’s avoiding all and every opportunity to make eye contact with you, something he’s never done, but you’re so close! How can he look at you when you’re just inches away from his face???
“Where your um… friends? Did they have to go?” He looks around for a moment, unable to detect whether they’re still in the classroom before you immediately responded.
“Nah, just got bored, I wanted to talk to you and thank you for not leaving any more dead things at my door either” You take your hands away from his face, much to his dismay. He swore his heart was about to start pumping loud enough for you to hear.
He could feel butterflies flutter in his stomach at the fact that you chose to hangout with him, you left your friends to talk to him. He must be doing something right if it means you chose to do that willingly, and now it has him even more drunk on the emotion he couldn’t name.
“About that, the gifting thing, I uh.. wanted to give you this” He holds up a clear encased lily of the valley in heart shaped form, becoming more transparent in the sunlight rays piercing it, it looked so pretty and well made you thought for a moment he had bought it.
“It took me a bit cause I didn’t know how to work with the mold.. I hope you like it” He softly spoke, placing it in your open palm as you admire it, he’s left nervously fiddling with his fingers like always, praying that you liked it.
“It’s so pretty, I know I told you not to get any poisonous flowers but this is a nice way to put it” You recall last time he tried bringing flowers but ended up failing because you had fallen asleep so he just left some daisy’s at your door. “I love it”
He perks up at your words, anxiety washing away easily just with those few. “I’m happy you like it, I could bring you more things everyday if you’d let me” He finally looks up to have his eyes meet with yours, hoping you’d allow him to continue this routine of gift giving.
Maybe one day, the right gift will make you so happy that you’ll want to date him. That’s his dream until he can at least manage to even say will you date me to the plushie he has that resembles you.
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lanabuckybarnes · 1 month
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Missed Dates.
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(I do not own any photos used, credit to original owners)
Bucky arranges a date for you both on the day he comes back from a mission, a date that he doesn't remember. Unfortunately, it's the straw that breaks the camel's back.
AN: Hello how are we all? sorry for not posting yesterday. I’ve got a limited amount of drafts and I wanna spread them before I run out of content.
Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Warnings: Bucky done be neglecting his bf duties.
Word count: around 918 (where'd they come from?)
(Bucky ever looked at my like that I’d be on my knees)
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Bucky has been busy with missions again. His pardon was never really a pardon, more of a we’ll forgive you if you do our dirty work. You can’t remember the last time he’d spent more than 2 weeks with you and in those 2 weeks, he was constantly being called away to meetings or other things.
The distance was becoming unbearable, you loved Bucky you really did but the time away from him was putting a wedge between you two. You’re last date night you’d dressed up all nice for him, he would be arriving back in New York around 5 pm, you had warned him about organising a date after a long mission— especially with his sleep pattern— but he brushed you off with a sweet kiss and honey-toned words.
When his heavy feet stomped into the apartment you knew he was tired, what you didn’t expect was for him to flop onto the couch and go to sleep. You checked the time, 4.45 pm, you were never making your reservation.
You heaved a sigh and swallowed the thick slew of emotions bubbling up your throat as you turned on your heel to take off the stupid dress.
That morning he’d woke up, brewed you both a coffee and said not a word about your missed date yesterday, usually he’d apologise for sleeping without so much as a hello and you told him there was no need but something about him completely glossing over the fact he hadn’t even mentioned your unsuccessful date— the first in over 2 months.
“Everything alright sweetheart?” His brows furrowed and his words cautious at the sight of your sour face, clearly you hadn’t been hiding your emotions very well, and the sound of his voice had anger washing over you
“Everything’s peachy” you spat, noticing instantly how his face turned to one of confusion, then anger.
“Hey, what’s your problem?” One of Bucky’s flaws was how defensive he got easily. You were rarely angry with him so to have you hiss at him, his guard was raised instantly.
“My problem!? I should be asking you, what’s your problem Bucky?” The words felt so foreign like they weren’t falling from your mouth. Bucky thought so too.
“I didn’t have a problem until you got all pissy, why?” He retorted, his jaw and fists clenching to suppress the urge to raise his voice.
“You wanna know why? Fine! Two fucking months we haven’t been on a date and when I get dressed up for you, after warning you about organising a date straight after you came off a plane, you sank your ass right on that couch and slept. I should’ve known Bucky I really should’ve” You stormed off to your shared bedroom, the slamming of the wood wasn’t the cause of Bucky’s flinch.
He’d forgotten all about you, you’d done your best for him and he’d completely disregarded it, he felt like the biggest piece of shit in the world.
He had to think of how to make it up to you.
An hour later there was a soft knock on the door, startling you awake. You rubbed at your sensitive eyes— you’d cried yourself to sleep because of the guilt you felt shouting at Bucky. You knew the risk of him being unable to do certain things due to missions and such was extremely high, you knew his sleep pattern was the worst leading him to stay awake days at a time, yet you still screamed at him.
You had every right to advocate for your needs but you couldn’t help that sinking feeling in your stomach.
A second knock pulled you from your trance “Hey…. Sweetheart, can I come in?” His voice was muffled by the door but you could tell he shared the same emotions as you.
“Y-yeah” you mentally cursed your hoarse throat.
Bucky entered holding a white box and a bag, his eyes looking slightly red and his shoulders slumped. Gently he took a seat next to you, far enough away that it hurt, you felt like you’d pushed him that far.
“Look I’m really sorry I forgot about yesterday, you warned me and I didn’t listen… I’ve booked us again for tomorrow if you’re up for it” he explained, flashing you his nervous smile.
“Didn’t you have-“
“I called in, let them know I was taking time off for some private reasons” he interrupted, his hand hovering over the white box he’d now placed between you on the bed. He opened it gently, his smile growing as he did. Inside was a cake, with cursive fondant.
‘I’m so sorry I’m an ass’
You couldn’t help but laugh at the decoration, your laugh drawing a chuckle from him as well
“I uhh also bought some snacks, I was thinking we could watch that movie you wanted to see” he spoke as his laughter died down, now replaced with a slight shyness.
Bucky might be a man with many flaws, yes sometimes he prioritised his work over you and he really tried to balance you both but sometimes it got too much. You had to admit though, the man truly knew the way to his woman’s heart.
“So?” He questioned, his fingers tapping his knee as his ocean blue eyes darted over your face.
“Aww Buck… I love you”
He smiled widely, relief pooling in his veins. leaning over he kissed you deeply.
“You know… you gotta make up for shouting at me” he mumbled against your lips.
This man. He was lucky he was cute.
-
THE URGE TO MAKE THIS AN ANGST AHHHH.
You guys are soo lucky I can’t write angst. I hope you enjoyed my 5am thoughts xx
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gasstationlady · 2 months
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the start of something beautiful | a lando norris social media au
pairing: lando norris x private!reader (fc: tyla)
lando is spotted with an unknown woman, and everyone thinks she’s another fling. however, later revealed as naomi campbell’s daughter, lando's fans slowly start to love her despite her tendency to be private.
notes: btw, i’m so sorry i’ve been mia for a while! honestly, i have a ton of drafts i’ve written over the time i didn’t post, but i lowkey hate all of them lmao. anyways, hope you enjoy this fluff :)
disclaimer: swearing. photos not mine. OLD PIC OF JAZ AND ROSS (yes it’s a warning bc i’m still mourning that relationship, and ik i’m not the only one). there are a few mistakes in the tweets that i was too lazy to fix lol. also, i hope the flow doesn’t feel too rushed!
masterlist
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yourusername
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liked by landonorris, yourbestie and 138 others
yourusername 🌸
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yourbestie 👀
↳ yourusername 🙈
yourbestie framing these pics brb 😍😍
f1gossip
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2,993 likes
f1gossip We received these photos of Lando and a girl today! It looks like the same girl he has been spotted with for the past 3 months, but it’s still unclear who it is. ☕️
View all 202 comments
user three months of them being pictured AND YET NONE CLEARLY CAPTURE HER FACE. that’s some bs
↳ user no deadass bc you guys had one job 🙄
user lmaoooo i know the delulu fans are crying that she’s still here
user Are we sure it's the same girl? Lmfao even if it is, he's probably going to get tired of her soon!
user god i hope people learn and treat her better than how they treated luisinha
landonorris
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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 759,301 others
landonorris First time trying wakeboarding 🤙
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user happy lando >>>
user Where’s your girlfriend
user not the red bull life vest lmfaoo
user lando rlly said here’s some shirtless pics to distract u
↳ user frrr but like it’s not working 😭
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f1gossip
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12,321 likes
f1gossip Naomi Campbell and daughter, Y/N Campbell, making an appearance at today’s GP! It's presumed that Y/N is dating Mclaren driver, Lando Norris. Our sources in the paddock mentions that the two visited the Mercedes, Ferrari, and Mclaren garages before the race. 👀
View all 188 comments
user i'm literally in love w her she's soo beautiful 😍
user this actually makes sense that they knew each other since naomi has been connected to f1 for a while now
user I would be unstoppable if I looked like her.
user she looks so kind 🥺🥺
user oh the things i would do to reincarnate as a wealthy person’s child
user i was there and got to meet her and i’d just like to say that i’d go to war for her
landoupdates
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7,626 likes
landoupdates Max, Lando, and Y/N (seen in second photo, far right) with fans at an after party! We received these pictures a few minutes ago, and the fan included “Y/N mostly stood behind as Max and Lando were asked for photos but she was so so kind !! Although you can tell she likes to keep to herself, she told me she thought my dress was cute and even got Lando’s attention for me so I could ask for a picture 😭 Also, he kept holding her hand !!!”
View all 204 comments
user her face card is insane.
user now that we know she's naomi's daughter, i can't believe we didn't see it before LOL
user “he kept holding her hand” 😭😭😭😭😭
user I have never wanted someone to go off private so bad 😩
user honestly she’s my new fav wag
user it’s the way everyone loves her rn lmaoooo
user LANDO CAN YOU FIGHT
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f1gossip
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11,234 likes
f1gossip Lando, Ginge, and Ethan possibly alluding to Lando’s new relationship with Y/N in the recent Quadrant video 👀👀
See all 239 comments
user not them clowning him 😭
user i mean we all know by now that they’re together but this was the cherry on top
user melting over how he couldn’t stop smiling 🥹
user the fact that he kept this clip in 😩😩
user I AM ONCE AGAIN ASKING “LANDO CAN YOU FIGHT”
user I get it 😭 I also wouldn’t be able to hide that I’m dating Y/N
user perfect example of private but not a secret, in love with them 🥹🥹
landoupdates
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5,389 likes
landoupdates A few photos of Lando and Y/N at the paddock today ☺️
See all 195 comments
user literally my fav couple
user when is he gonna make it officially on insta
↳ user My thoughts exactly!! 😭😭 I know not everything has to be posted, but I’m just excited to see him officially announce it.
user my girl y/n looked so fucking good today
user i just want him to post her solely because i want more y/n pics
↳ user LOL you’re so real for that
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landonorris
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liked by yourusername, angryginge13, georgerussell63 and 1,221,334 others
landonorris We so good ❤️
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user THE HAND PLACEMENT
user not tagging her is criminal 😭😭
↳ user girl what’s the point when she’s on private
user When will it be my turn 😩
user LANDO??? OMFG
user TURN IT UP IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE 😁😁😁🔊🔊
user omggg i can’t, they’re goals
user Y/N IS SO CUTE
user i luv my parents
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verstappen-cult · 2 months
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# IN A WORLD OF BOYS, THEY’RE GENTLEMEN | MV1 & CL16
summary: people always like to jump into conclusions and you are the internet’s newest victim, the ‘slut playing with two boys’. little do they know, there’s more to the story.
pairings: max verstappen x fem!reader x charles leclerc. content warning: kaia gerber as fem!reader, cursing, toxic fans, tiny bit of angst because i like to make them suffer, f1 grid because they need their own warning. inspired in the song slut! by taylor swift.
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# INSTAGRAM
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Liked by user01, f1wagsnews and 152,840 others
paddockgossip Max Verstappen and a mysterious girl spotted in Monaco this afternoon. This is the second time we’ve seen them in a span of two weeks. We still don’t know who she is, but they seem pretty close. Is Max Verstappen finally taken?
View all 9,738 comments
user01 not paddockgossip calling max’s childhood friend a ‘mysterious girl’ loool
user02 she’s been getting so much attention ever since they started dating
user03 we don’t even know if they’re actually dating
user04 i’m sure i’ve seen her before 🤔
user05 that’s because you have! she was seen with charles leclerc like a month ago but no one talks about it bc they haven’t been seen together after that user06 she’s friends with max AND charles????
user07 is this really max wearing non redbull merch???
user08 the girlfriend effect is real user09 ffs we don’t know if they’re dating
user10 no one’s asking the important question here: who is she?? do we have an instagram, twitter, something????
user11 she’s @/yourusername user12 no way she’s THAT pretty
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Liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 63,734 others
yourusername tummy hurts don’t talk 2 me
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user13 so this is max’s new girlfriend?
user14 shes one of us.
user15 SHE LIKES MAX VERSTAPPEN AND LANA DEL REY? SHE’S JUST LIKE ME FR
user16 and she has stomach issues too. it’s like looking at myself in a mirror
charles_leclerc but i was omw with some goddies, what do i do now?
yourusername tummy don’t hurt anymore 🥺
user17 i didn’t know charles and y/n were that close
user18 girl haven’t you seen the photos? user17 WHAT PHOTOS
maxverstappen1 i won’t say i told you so but i told you so.
yourusername you’re no fun at all
user18 oh to be y/n and have not one but two formula 1 drivers flirting with me in the comments
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# TWITTER
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# INSTAGRAM
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Liked by maxverstappen1, redbullracing and 135,767 others
yourusername book nerds! 📚 we have some really exciting changes coming for our book club in the next couple of weeks — but in the meantime, i want to share that the incredible @/lauradern will be joining us to talk about “honey, baby, mine”, a collection of conversations between laura and her mom… grab a copy and join us next thursday!
View all 12,658 comments
ana_d_armas This is amazing! 👏👏 can’t wait to join you and know more about this amazing book.
user19 Reading now!
user20 is that-is that really max verstappen?
user21 max verstappen? like as in formula one champion max verstappen? THAT ONE?
user22 what is max doing with her?
user23 do u think he knows about what’s going on with her and charles? think about your gf cheating on your face with your so called ‘friend’ user24 he has to know otherwise that’s pretty sad. user22 think about your gf cheating on you with your friend and having to see that friend every weekend… that’s so fucking awkward!
user25 where is charles? you got tired of him already? 😂
redbullracing You said he was gonna join your book club but all I see is Max napping. Bad. Very bad behavior.
yourusername sorry admin i tried!
user26 i need an explanation, like i would settle for anything at this point i just wanna know what is happening with them
user27 stop freaking out! they’re probably just friends
user28 yeah right nobody believes that
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paddockgossip New photos of Max Verstappen and Y/N L/N out and about in Barcelona. There are multiple witnesses that saw the couple ‘very cozy, they couldn’t stop touching each other’ inside the restaurant — this comes after the pictures of Y/N with Charles Leclerc kissing on his yatch just a week ago. We don’t know what is happening, who is cheating on who, but we do not support this kind of behavior.
View all 19,767 comments
user29 this is disgusting
user30 what is this chick playing at?
user31 oh shut up you all. you wish you were her.
user32 WHAT IS GOING ON WHY IS NO ONE SAYING SOMETHING ??? user33 probably because this is bullshit
user34 you don’t know anything. is actually so fun seeing you all losing your minds over this.
user35 I NEED ANSWERS
user36 they look good together ngl
francisca.cgomes 😂
user37 kika what does this mean
user38 they’re sick
user39 she’s jumping from one driver to another it wouldn’t surprise me if the next one is lando.
user40 at this point i think she would pretty much crawl into anybody’s bed
user41 she’s just looking for fame
user42 that’s what i’m saying! just look at her followers now, she gained like 100k user43 oh i hate her so much
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Liked by user44, wags_news and 534,665 others
paddockgossip Well, well… We really thought we wouldn’t get any more news about the chaotic mess between Y/N L/N and Max Verstappen & Charles Leclerc, so, we were a little surprised to see Charles’ latest instagram story (second slide) where he tagged Y/N! It’s a beautiful picture but then we have Y/N’s story: a conversation between her and Max Verstappen. So, what do you think is happening here?
View all 25,736 comments
user45 OH MY GOD LOVE OF MY LIFE?????
user46 are they-are they soft launching their relationship?
user47 nah it’s mpossible these boys don’t know y/n is playing with them
user48 oh bestie that is so not what’s happening here
user49 I KNEW IT BUT NO ONE BELIEVED ME
user50 what the actual fuck
user51 she’s such a slut
user52 she’s cheating and she doesn’t care. iconic
user53 i’m gonna throw up
user54 they need to get out of there asap
user55 SHES DATING BOTH OF THEM
user56 OH MY FUCKING GOD SHES DATING BOTH OF THEM. SHES DATING LESTAPPEN
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Liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and others
yourusername you really thought you knew it all, uh?
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maxverstappen1 loves of my life.
liked by author and charles_leclerc
user57 WHAT THE FFFFFFFFFF
charles_leclerc my pretty girl and pretty boy.
liked by author and maxverstappen1
user58 THEY ARE DATING??? THE THREE OF THEM??
carlossainz55 FUCKING FINALLY.
user59 LESTAPPEN IS REAL WTF
lilymhe i love you all so much. 🩷
pierregasly you can finally stop moaning to me about wanting to be public. i was just about to commit murder.
user60 i never thought i would see the day where charles and max would be kissing
user61 not only that but also dating user62 in a poly relationship*
francisca.cgomes my favorite throuple. 💜
user63 this is so NOT what i was expecting
landonorris can you adopt me?
oscarpiastri me too, please.
user64 the fifth pic??? i also wanna kiss both of them pls
redbullracing Can we celebrate now? 🥺
scuderiaferrari My house? 10PM?
alex_albon this is such a surprise to me. i’m shocked.
danielricciardo MY PARENTS. 🤩
user65 look at that last slide 😭 they really were destined to be together.
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soobnny · 10 months
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ten things kim seungmin says when he thinks you’re asleep — fluff, established relationship, a sprinkle of angst
chan | lee know | changbin | hyunjin | han | felix | SEUNGMIN | jeongin
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one. i know i complain a lot when you reach out to grab my hand but i actually really like it. please don’t stop doing it. i guess, i just have never been used to touching anyone intimately, even if it’s just holding hands. but it feels safe when it’s with you. i didn’t know before that it was possible to have your whole world in your hand, but it feels so much like that when i’m holding yours. and for a moment, it makes me think my thoughts are closer to you. can you hear how much i love you?
two. you make me believe in forever. god—what have you done to me? i’ve always known things come to an end eventually, but knowing you and loving you has made me yearn for an eternity. i hope i make you believe in a forever too.
three. the boys told me i’ve gotten softer. i’m not quite sure what they mean, but they told me it’s because of you. i think they might be right.
four. you looked tired today, and you didn’t finish the meal i cooked for you. i know you hate being coddled when you’re upset so i don’t do it, but i wish i could do more. ah, please eat well tomorrow. i’m worried. you know you can tell me anything, right?
five. you know, i almost cried a few hours ago. it was because you started crying! i’m sorry you thought you couldn’t tell me about it, but thank you for trusting me enough to tell me. it’s gonna be okay, yeah? you’ve survived everything so far, so you’ll survive this one too.
six. i noticed something when i went out to karaoke with the boys. i think of you when i sing love songs. i didn’t notice it at first—not until hyunjin pointed out how i was smiling so much, more than i normally would. you know how i feel about my smile. then i realized it’s because i was thinking of you. i smile without thinking because of you. i’d never tell you this, ah i can already hear you teasing me but every love song is dedicated to you. they’re only ever for you.
seven. it’s so lovely to see how i’ve grown with you. i really think you’ve helped me change for the better. thanks for sticking around even when i got annoyed really easily. i didn’t think anyone could believe in me as much as you did.
eight. i hope you’ll do what makes you happy. it’s all i’ll ever ask of you.
nine. i think i need to tell you i love you more often. i don’t say it a lot, but i really do. it’s just that—my heart hurts when i say it. i think i love you too much.
ten. goodnight. i’ll smile tomorrow for you.
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