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sehunniepotwrites · 3 years

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if we were a movie | j.jh

for @nctsworld’s first writing challenge

SYNOPSIS. For someone who was always the understudy and never the lead, scoring this role was huge for you. All you had to do was pretend to be in love with your best friend. No big deal, right? Wrong. It was the biggest deal because, for the past four years, you had been hiding your feelings for Jung Jaehyun.

If this were a movie, he would be your perfect match and the story would end happily with the credits rolling to a perfectly timed soundtrack. Too bad this wasn’t a movie— this was real life and life came with complications.

GENRE. childhood friends to lovers!au, college!au, drama school!au, slow burn, angst, humor, mutual pining, fluff (loosely based on the Filipino rom-com Must Be Love and If We Were a Movie by Hannah Montana) PAIRING. theatre major!Jaehyun x theatre major!reader WORD COUNT. 14+ k

WARNINGS. point of view switches from first (”I”) to second (”you”); self-doubt, insecurities, mutual pining, cursing, lots of references and direct quotes from musicals such as Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Cinderella, Disney’s Newsies, Disney’s Beauty and the Beast, Shrek the Musical, and Wicked (edited but i might’ve missed some mistakes; bare with me!)

There are moments where time flows as normal, where people carry on with their days as they usually do. Then, there are moments people experience in slow-motion, where the world just stops spinning and all the background noise just fades away. These are the moments people look forward to. They’re the breathtaking ones, the ones that capture your heart and soul. After those moments, people are never the same.

The first time I experienced something in slow motion was when I made my stage debut at a small talent show. There was thunderous applause after my performance and while my heart thumped against my chest, the world seemed to come to a stop. That’s when I knew my heart belonged to the stage or rather, the stage belonged to me.

Some of these slo-mo moments are the ones where people fall in love.

My father said that’s how he knew my mother was the one for him: he experienced it all at a slowed rate, everything fading into black and she was the only thing he saw. She was his brightest star and he was the one who reached for the sky to bring her down to Earth.

When I was younger, I always dreamed about my “falling in love” slow-mo moment. I pictured a grandiose event with large actions and sweet words. For it to actually happen at theatre camp during the initial dress rehearsal for Disney’s Beauty and the Beast J.R.— well, that was far from what I hoped for.

And yet, it was just as special as I thought it would be.

I was in my obnoxious fork costume, waiting for my best friend to leave the boy’s dressing room.

Jung Jaehyun had been my best friend since the beginning, otherwise known as my first year at theatre camp. Only ten years old at the time, we both were cast as two of the three blind mice in Shrek the Musical and had been inseparable ever since. Although we attended different middle schools, our friendship grew from our shared vocal and dance lessons as well as our summers at camp. You know how it is; those who end up in the ensemble together stay together.

Going over the dance moves in my head, I didn’t hear my friend’s voice calling my name. He gripped my shoulder, the action surprising me to the point where I lost my balance. I yelped and shut my eyes, expecting to fall onto the hard ground but a hand grabbing onto my wrist prevented my doom. With an arm around my waist, I barely missed the ground.

Slowly opening my eyes, I glanced up to see Jung Jaehyun looking down at me with a worried gaze. He was just a sixteen-year-old boy dressed as a spoon and yet, the world around us came to a halt. Gone were the other frantic theatre kids and the backstage messes. The couple playing Belle and the Beast was no longer sitting across from us, running through their lines. No hustle and bustle of the crew and the props masters.

It was just me dressed as a fork, falling down while my spoon for a best friend caught me in his arms.

“We make quite a pair, don’t we, Forky?” he chuckled lowly, hitting the top of his costume to mine. It was a ridiculous sight— a pair of oversized cutlery in a crowded dressing room.

A burning hot sensation crept its way up to my face as he gently pulled me up. “I guess we do.”

Since then, my life has never been the same. I was in love with my best friend, Jung Jaehyun. I fell for him when the world stopped spinning beneath my feet while his world, unfortunately, kept on turning.

I remember each and every slowed-down moment in life —the good, the bad, and the absolute worst. I never thought a bad slo-mo moment existed, I simply didn’t think it was possible.

I was young and naive then and I was so incredibly wrong.

The moment that hurt me most took place in my senior year of high school. The final callbacks for our community’s production of Disney’s Newsies were in order. The role of Jack Kelly, the headstrong and flirty newsboy, was easily given to the ever-so-charming Jung Jaehyun. He was not only my best friend at the time but he was the it-boy of our small theatre. People were either in love with him or wanted to be him— his talent matched his insane looks. His kind personality made him all the more lovable.

Jaehyun had his two fatal flaws, though. Everyone knew them but still saw him in such a bright light.

One: the boy was extremely clumsy. Jaehyun was often called “magic hands,” constantly ruining his props. It was a running gag in the theatre but the props committee never minded; one smile was all it took for them to forgive him and his cursed hands.

That was his first flaw. And his second? Jaehyun fell in love way too easily and way too fast.

How exactly did I find this out? Well, I was there to witness the scene that lifted his heart to the highest of levels while mine dropped straight to the ground.

I was in the running for the stubbornly intelligent female lead named Katherine Plumber. My opponent was the confident and radiant Son Wendy. She always played the lead in her high school productions but this was a community musical and I was determined to claim that part as my own.

I went first, entering the audition room with a smile with the script gripped tightly in my palm. Performing alongside my best friend was easy. The romantic scene was a piece of cake, not because the lines were a breeze. That wasn’t it at all. It wasn’t because I memorized the Newsies script as a child either. It was because, at that moment, Jung Jaehyun was in love with me as much as I was in love with him. It was a moment I wanted to cherish forever: the way he looked at me was something I had never experienced before. It was so full of emotion and passion, like he had me within his grasp and never wanted to let me go.

“You got this. I believe in you,” he whispered in my ear, squeezing my hand in support. His breath tickled my skin and sent shivers down my spine. The nerves were back, not because of the audition, but because of him.

“You’re just saying that because it’s the scene we’re about to act out, Jae,” I hissed. The sheet music for the duet, Something to Believe In, wrinkled in my free palm.

His warm, comforting hand pressed harder against my own. “No, it’s not that. If you need someone to believe in you, I’m right here. I’ve got you, Forky. Always.”

The director cleared his throat from his seat, his scrutinizing eyes watching us closely as we got into position, just like we rehearsed a thousand times. “Whenever you’re ready.”

I watched as Jaehyun took a deep breath to get into character. He closed his eyes, rolled his broad shoulders back, and then his lids snapped open. His brown-eyed gaze aimed straight at me, with a vulnerable expression taking over his features. He was no longer Jung Jaehyun— he was Jack Kelly, a scared newsboy who was in love with a newspaper company heiress.

The line came pouring out of his mouth with the utmost sincerity, the confusion and affection seeping through his words, “Just standing here tonight, looking at you, I’m scared tomorrow is gonna come and change everything.”

Jaehyun took a step forward towards me, an unsure smile curling on his lips. “If there was a way I could just grab hold of something to make time stop just so I could keep looking at you.”

His body stops right in front of mine, keeping a clear distance but enough to feel the passion radiating off of his words and actions. For once in my young life, my best friend looked at me with a different kind of love in his eyes and I returned it, my genuine feelings seeping through my words.

Biting my lip, I replied coyly, “You snuck up on me, Jack Kelly, I never even saw it coming.”

“For sure?” he stage-whispered. His upstage hand unexpectedly reached up to caress my cheek. The action was unrehearsed, almost catching me off guard. It was a different take on the scene. The characters were supposed to be shy, their thoughts wavering on their own feelings for each other and the impending strike that was to come the day after; yet, Jaehyun played Jack as someone certain of his feelings.

“For sure,” I answered back at the same volume, my hand cupping his own to follow along with his direction. It felt as if he was searching my soul for my thoughts and I could not let him in. The opening bars of the romantic duet echoed throughout the room and after taking a breath, I began to sing. Jaehyun joined in on the second verse and instantly, our voices blended together in a beautiful harmony, one that beat our Newsies karaoke sessions in his car.

The scene ended as quickly as it began. The director hummed before jotting notes down and whispering to his casting assistants for a few seconds. I thought they were the longest seconds of my life. Jaehyun nodded his head to reassure me. “You did well, Forky.”

“Of course I did, it’s me we’re talking about here,” I nudged him back. “I can do no wrong, Jae!”

“Thank you,” the director finally spoke, “you may go. Jaehyun, if you could escort her out and fetch Wendy for me?”

“Of course,” your friend nodded. The feeling of his large hand on my back slowly guided me out of the room. The spot he touched me burned but my cheeks were burning even more. Why was it that every little touch drove me to the brink of insanity?

“You’re so going to land this part,” I remember him saying as he squeezed my waist. My heart was beating erratically against my ribcage, the butterflies in my stomach threatening to fly their way up my throat.

“You think so?”

“Oh definitely,” Jaehyun stressed with a wink.

He said it too soon.

Because the minute he locked gazes with Son Wendy, I just knew he had found his leading lady.

“S-Son Wendy?” he stuttered as he caught sight of the pretty girl in the waiting room. Her hair was styled similarly to a young maiden from the turn of the century, perfectly curled and out of her face.

“Yes?” she smiled back.

It seemed like the words were caught in my best friend’s throat. Sneaking a glance at Jaehyun’s ears, they burned a bright red. “We’re, um, we’re ready for you.”

I watched as Jaehyun nervously offered his arm to her, his eyes never leaving her face. It was like he was her own personal spotlight, the way his eyes shone just for the girl in front of him. The boy was completely enamored and I was instantly in the shadows. The sweet smile that was reserved for me was directed towards another and it sparkled in a way it never did before.

The world around me moved incredibly slow as they passed me by. With everything frozen, all I saw was the gorgeous couple headed to the audition room with hushed exchanges. Jaehyun took his time heading to the private room to spend more time with the girl while Son Wendy steadily made her way into my friend’s fragile heart. My own heart clenched at the sight. It was breaking ever so slowly and I felt every little crack and tear.

Even with the role of the understudy, it was as if I never even had a chance at winning his heart over. If Wendy wasn’t present for one rehearsal, Jaehyun didn’t even see me— his own best friend since our ensemble days. He was way too deep into his “showmance.” It was like I never even existed. It wasn’t long before he called Wendy his girlfriend and then, I was invisible. Cast aside. Ignored.

Needless to say, my heart broke in slow-motion as Jaehyun’s pounded rapidly for a girl that took two parts I desperately ached for: Katherine Plumber and the girl who held Jaehyun’s heart.

But this was just the first time his heart was stolen by his opposite. The first of many.

The first two years of university passed me by like a summer breeze. Constantly busy with general education and introductory drama courses, I was constantly flitting around from building to building. My hands were usually occupied by my laptop, a blazing cup of caffeinated tea, and a worn out script while my mind was filled with jumbled up lines and the dramatic cries of an overwhelmed university student. I probably wouldn’t have made it this far if it wasn’t for Jaehyun and Xiao Dejun, another theatre major we had met during orientation, by my side.

Fast forward to my third year and the three of us were headed to the office of the theatre department. It was posting day for the spring musical— the day the cast list was revealed. This year’s musical spectacular was Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Cinderella. The play itself was a modern classic and it was also my dream come true.

This day, just like any posting day of the drama department, was nerve-racking. Everyone was anxious to find out what parts they were given and how the fairytale would play out. The part of the brave and kind Ella was always on my list of roles I wanted to fill. As much as I thought I did well on my final callback, I didn’t want to set my hopes too high.

“Are you nervous?” Jaehyun asked while draping an arm over my shoulder. He playfully put all his weight onto his right side to throw me off balance.

“Nervous? Me? Why would I be nervous if I’m like 95% sure I’m going to get the understudy again?” I chuckled sarcastically. Bitterly. It happened every year, so why get my hopes up now?

“Yeah but—”

“No buts, I’ve accepted the title of the Wonderstudy! I think you should too, Jae,” I slapped his shoulder before quickly slipping out of his hold before linking arms with Dejun. My best friend let out a yelp, almost tripping over his own two feet as we continued down the hallway. “I’m mediocre at best.”

The Wonderstudy: it was the nickname the other students in the department gave me because I was always the understudy. I was never the star of the show. It said that I was good but not good enough.

Dejun leaned in and whispered, “You do know that you’re more than just that, right? You’re an actor. A phenomenal one. You weren’t accepted to this drama program by just being mediocre at best.”

I ignored my friend’s comment, eyes zoned in at the other end of the building. The crowd of usual theatre students crowded around the bulletin board, curious heads popping up and down trying to take a peek at the list. Some buzzed with excitement, happy they got a major part while others groaned in disappointment. You were most likely going to be with the later group.

Once the cluster of students caught sight of Jaehyun, they parted like the red sea to let him through. It wasn’t really necessary, though, everyone knew the it-boy of the drama department was cast as the role of the misguided prince, Topher.

The only question was: who was cast as his princess? Who was this year’s Ella?

I fought my way through the bunch with Dejun following behind me as our best friend was showered with congratulations. Jaehyun was all smiles, dimples prominent as he was lavished by the mass. Dejun made it to the list first. His finger dragged along the thin paper until he found his name. He cheered, pumping his fist up in joy. “I got the part I wanted! I’m Jean-Michel!”

Grinning at my friend, I sincerely congratulated him. He got the second lead: the feisty peasant looking for change. Turning again, his eyes grazed the list until Dejun found my name. His smile dropped ever so slightly and that was when I knew: I was beaten once again.

“What part did I get?”

“Gabrielle,” he answered. Ah, the outwardly abrasive but quietly empathetic sister. The second lead, love interest of Jean-Michel. At least I was playing Dejun’s opposite.

I took a step closer, wondering who took the part of the kind princess. Squinting at the small print, my eyes scanned the jumble of words until I saw it.

Ella……………………….Lee Naeun Ella u/s………………….Y/N

I scoffed. Forever the understudy. The Wonderstudy of the Theatre Department indeed.

The first rehearsal, otherwise known as the read-through, took a toll on me. It was usually a two to three hour long session, filled with loud chatter, crazy introductions, and a variety of crazy theatre games to break the ice. When the niceties ended, everyone took their seats in their plastic chairs that were arranged in a huge circle. Bae Joohyun, the head stage manager began reading the stage directions aloud as the table read began. The production’s director, Professor O’Hare, sat alongside Joohyun, jotting down notes and giving out commentary when needed.

Amongst the reading of lines were tiny whispers, the sound of highlighters and pencils marking the paper, and the simultaneous turning of pages. The music director, Professor Lau sat at the piano bench and sight-read the music to give the cast a taste of the songs. Being the first rehearsal, the few who knew of the songs sang along to the accompaniment with joyous smiles, myself and Dejun included.

When Professor Lau played the first romantic duet between the leads, all heads turned to Jaehyun and Naeun who sat side-by-side. With it being their first time together, the performance was far from perfect but it was still something. His lower tone blended nicely with her softer voice and the shy glances they exchanged made their duet quite a sight.

As Jaehyun and Naeun read the last lines for Act One, I noticed the way Jaehyun’s gaze kept flittering back to Naeun’s pretty face. The girl was focused on her lines, head down and hair blocking her gorgeous features, but he still kept looking at her and only her. I could imagine how the scene was playing out in his head, the world slowing down until Naeun was the only one moving. He was infatuated. Twitterpated.

And it hurt. It hurt more than reading the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet or listening to Elphaba’s desperate cry she lets out when she loses Fiyero. Call me dramatic but that was how I felt.

It wasn’t like I tried getting over him. It wasn’t like I tried dating other people before; I had many, many times but my mind always drifted back to my best friend. He was the boy with the richest brown eyes, the perfectly dimpled smile, and the lowest laugh that set my heart aflame. Without even knowing it, Jaehyun had this incredible hold on my broken heart and he would not let me out of his grip.

The green-eyed monster inside me resurfaced and I hated it. I absolutely hated it— why was I so pathetically in love with my best friend?

“Here we go again,” I said before dropping my head onto the table.

“You say that every time and you keep running back to him at the end of the day,” Dejun whispered before looking back down at his script. His hand continued to jet across the page, his highlighter marking his many lines.

Rolling up the script in my hand, I whacked his side. The action caused his hand to jerk the bright marker in another direction, striking a distorted line on his page. “Look what you did, twerp!” he hissed.

“Your fault, Eyebrows!”

“Stop calling me that, you fork!”

“Hey, only I can call her fork!” Jaehyun appeared out of nowhere, plopping alongside me. His voice snapped us out of our little argument, making us realize that the director called for a fifteen.

“That’s only because you’re a dumb spoon,” I stuck my tongue out at him. Jaehyun pretended to reach for it and I blew a raspberry at him to retaliate.

“You two idiots are my favorite cutlery set,” Dejun shook his head with a laugh. He was probably wondering why he stuck around us the majority of the time.

“Let off it, Dejun,” Jaehyun said with the roll of his brown orbs.

“Only if you let me be the knife to your set.”

“As if, dumbass,” I countered with a laugh.

“Okay but you guys, can we stop fighting for a sec and talk about how I got her number?” Jaehyun beamed, throwing his arms over both our shoulders. He pulled us closer to his body and the faint smell of his musky cologne hit my nose. I held back a sigh as it filled my senses. Oh, to be drowned in his scent.

“I got Naeun’s number!” he repeated excitedly, his strong arms shaking us. I held back my abrupt want to push him off. I wasn’t in a celebrating mood. My heart was too broken to care.

“Of course you did, when do you not get a girl’s number?” I answered a bit too bitterly. Raising a brow at him, I added, “Are we supposed to be surprised?”

“Listen,” Jaehyun countered, pulling back from me. “I don’t like that attitude, Forky.”

I scoffed, “Never stopped you from being my friend before, Jae.”

Jaehyun didn’t answer; he was too busy clutching his phone. His pretty brown eyes were fixed on Naeun’s contact page like it was the world’s greatest treasure. His eyes were sparkling in admiration before his gaze turned to the girl across the room. The look my best friend wore on his face was soft, the smile on his lips light. “I think she could be the one.”

Some thought him to be a player but I never thought of him that way. He might have had the looks of a heartbreaker but he had the purest heart of gold. The boy with the dimpled smile, porcelain skin, and cheeks as red as roses was a hopeless romantic to his very core. He was simply looking for his other half.

“I think she could be the one.” His words repeated in my head, his voice pestering me. My heart lurched at them despite hearing them each semester.

Jaehyun said this every year, with every girl. He said this when he crushed on Son Wendy, Kim Chungha, and so many more. His infatuations and crushes ended just as easily as they started. The boy was more than disappointed when the initial spark with each girl ended after a show’s run ended. When the musical closed, so did his feelings for each opposite.

I never got stage fright; I was usually the one who said what was on her mind without a moment’s hesitation. So why was I hesitating to tell him my feelings?

Why was I hesitating to say that the one Jaehyun could be looking for was standing right next to him?

Just another rehearsal at the auditorium.

Just another day watching my best friend fall for his leading lady.

Jaehyun and Naeun were standing in the middle of the stage, the ensemble surrounding them. He stood behind her, his hands gently placed on her waist while she leaned back into his touch. Naeun was wearing a fluffy tulle skirt, a mock-up of her ballgown. Park Sooyoung, the resident fashion major and lead costume designer, pushed her to wear it so she could get used to the estimated size of her dress. Even in a mere tank top and tulle skirt, Lee Naeun looked like a princess.

Professor Kwon, the choreographer of the production, stood at the end with a watchful eye. She counted them off, walking them through the routine while the rest of us practiced our steps off to the sidelines.

Once the two main characters got the hang of their steps, Professor Kwon motioned for Professor Lau to play the songs from the beginning. As much as I tried to focus on my own dance moves, my mind kept wandering back to Jaehyun.

Imagining him under the spotlight in a perfectly tailored suit, a crown sitting on his head, extending his arm out not to Naeun but to me. It was one of those movie moments where the characters and the audience watching fell in love.

If life was like a movie, things would be so much easier.

So lost in my thoughts, I missed a count and stepped on my partner’s foot. Muttering a quiet sorry to him, we continued on with the routine. As my partner swirled me around the dance floor, I drifted back into my daydream.

My utterly impossible daydream where I was the girl Jung Jaehyun was infatuated with. Although this play talked about impossible things happening everyday, I couldn’t imagine this ever happening.

The terrible thing about being a theatre major in university was being a theatre major with midterms. Not only did I have to deal with hours of my back hunched over a desk and scattered study materials, I had to spend half of my days in the school’s theatre rehearsing.

If I was not in class scribbling down last minute notes in notebooks, I was learning dance routines or running lines on and off stage alongside Dejun. The days were long and the nights were even longer. Sometimes, the cast fell asleep in the seats of the auditorium while rehearsals were going on. We were all losing sleep. Some of us were losing our sanity but hey, welcome to the theatre.

My schedule was filled to the brim and I wasn’t even the main character of the show. On top of that, I had to memorize the part of Ella. Not that it was really needed in the first place.

No one ever stepped down from a lead role while I was their backup. It just didn’t happen.

Despite the hectic lives of belonging to the theatre department, the musical was two months into production and everything was running smoothly. With a month and a left until opening night, everyone was off-book and the initial stage blocking was done. The costuming and makeup committee were finishing up their mock-up designs and the student orchestra sounded divine.

I saw more of Dejun than Jaehyun lately, my best friend being preoccupied with his new love interest before, during, and after rehearsals. I was cast aside once again.

Was it something out of the ordinary? No.

Did it still hurt? Yes.

Did I do anything about it? Absolutely not. I didn’t want to ruin his happiness. I rather suffer than see him as nothing but joyous, even if the happiness was temporary. The grin he wore when he was in love was too beautiful to rip away. Jaehyun shined like the light from the sun. I could never bring myself to do it.

It was week eight of rehearsals when I stepped out of my last midterm, my head absolutely empty after reading small text for over an hour. Reaching into my backpack’s front pocket, I pulled out my cell phone and quickly turned it on. My screen was flooded with missed calls and texts from Professor O’Hare, Joohyun, Jaehyun, and Dejun, the notification numbers reaching over a hundred total.

Something must have happened. Talk about a theatre emergency. Knowing our kind, they were probably being overdramatic.

Just as I was about to unlock my phone, a video call went through. It was Dejun. Rolling my eyes, I slid my finger across the screen to answer it. “Jeez, I know you love me but give a girl a break, Eyebrows!”

“God, you’re so conceited sometimes. Why didn’t you answer my calls?!” He shouted, face close to the phone. I winced at the volume, immediately lowering the level as I slipped on my wireless earbuds. “There are important matters to discuss here!”

“What happened this time? Did someone say Macbeth in the theatre again? You know I don’t believe in that shit,” I said sarcastically.

“Oh my god. This is not the time for jokes! Everyone’s been trying to reach you!” Xiaojun yelled once more. “Where are you?!”

“I just got out of my musical history midterm in Maple Hall. Heading to the theatre right now. Why?” I never received an answer; Dejun hung up the call. Giving my phone a weird look, I shoved it in my pocket before continuing on my way. A light push on my back prevented me from going too far.

“Twerp!” Xiao Dejun’s voice came from behind me, yanking me by the straps of my backpack. He was breathing heavily, trying to catch his breath. “Oh my god, we’ve been looking for you everywhere,” he said in between heavy breaths.

Crossing my arms, I cocked a brow at him. “Why’s that?”

Dejun placed a hand on my shoulder for support. The words came flying out of his mouth, I almost couldn’t catch what he was saying. So much for being a theatre major.

“Speak clearly, Dejun. Enunciate, articulate, exaggerate, remember? We are thespians and thespians do not mumble!”

The exhausted boy ignored my theatricals. “Naeun didn’t land a switch leap right and she rolled her ankle during advanced ballet. She’s going to be out for at least three to four weeks,” my friend replied breathily, his words a lot clearer than before.

The news shocked me to the core, my feet suddenly planted to the ground. It sounded like he said Naeun was out of commission. “What?”

“She’s out for three to four weeks! I mean sucks for her, I wish her a speedy recovery but do you know what this means?”

The lack of response from me urged him to continue, “Sweetheart, she’s out. You’re in!”

Oh shit. I was in.

The part I had always dreamed of was mine. The lead role was finally mine.

I was now Ella and Jung Jaehyun was my Prince Topher.

Having an understudy step up to their role halfway through production was always something to get used to. It was a setback, a minor one, but still a setback. Just as Jaehyun finally settled into his role and built an unshakeable bond with Lee Naeun as his opposite, the accident happened. His potential girlfriend was now out of the show and off her feet in order to push for a speedy recovery.

The lovesick boy couldn’t even be there for her because his rehearsal times increased in order to get his best friend adjusted to your new role. There he was, leaning against the piano while waiting for you to arrive.

Professor Lau sat at the bench, flipping through his sheet music until he found the song he was looking for.

The door slammed open and you stumbled in. “Am I late? I’m sorry, I just heard the news.”

“No, not at all. You’re right on time,” the professor smiled at you. “The situation’s weird, I know but congratulations on getting Ella.”

“Thanks, Professor. That means a lot,” you grinned back.

Dropping your bag by the piano, you swiftly pulled out the script. You glanced at Jaehyun’s opened book for the page number before hastily flipping through the pages. Jaehyun nudged your side. “Hey, Forky.”

“Hey yourself,” you elbowed him back, biting your bottom lip.

“Congrats, bubs. You did it,” he pulled you into a side hug before ruffling your hair with pride. You had finally gotten a part you wanted. It was your time to shine. As your best friend for many years, Jaehyun had been waiting for the day you could show the crowds your full potential.

“Did I really do it or did your girlfriend just get injured? How is she, by the way?”

As much as you tried to play the overdramatic, conceited girl, you never believed in yourself but Jaehyun always did. You deserve the spotlight; your talent was out of this world and the masses were finally granted a chance to see you for what you were— a star.

“You did this. You were made for this part as much as she was,” Jaehyun reassured his best friend with a smile. He tapped your nose. “And she’s not my girlfriend but she’s doing alright. Just in a little bit of pain. I’m going to see her after we finish.”

“Give her some well wishes for me,” you answered. Jaehyun didn’t notice your smile dropping into a small frown.

“You ready to act like you’re in love with me?”

“I was born ready, you doof.” There was something weird in your voice when those words left your lips but Jaehyun didn’t have time to process it.

Professor Lau guided the students through a series of warm-ups before asking, “Shall we start with Do I Love You Because You’re Beautiful today? We’ll do a couple of run-throughs before Jaehyun teaches you the blocking.” His fingers played the beginning notes of the song, the light melody drifting to their ears.

Already off book at this point, Jaehyun closed his eyes and began to sing.

Do I love you because you’re beautiful? Or are you beautiful because I love you?

Am I making believe I see in you A girl too lovely to be really true?

Do I want you because you’re wonderful? Or are you wonderful because I want you?

Are you the sweet invention of a lover’s dream? Or are you really as wonderful as you seem?

When his eyes fluttered open, Jaehyun found himself facing you with a script in hand. Your face wore the softest look as you stared back at him. His breath almost caught in his throat at the gentle smile you wore. You played the part differently from Naeun and it was a refreshing sight to behold. You were playing a confused peasant but your eyes still sparkled with the gleam of a thousand suns.

There was a flush of heat that started from his cheeks and extended to his reddening ears. His heart was doing its best to break out of his ribcage and the star of the show wasn’t sure if his chest could keep it in for very much longer.

When singing with him, Naeun was a pretty princess.

But when he sang with you, the girl in front of him? Jaehyun thought you were absolutely breathtaking.

Two hours later, we were finally free of rehearsals. My first rehearsal as Ella. My throat was a bit parched from all the singing and projecting I was doing but I felt lighter than air. Singing with Jaehyun made me feel lighter than air. I was weightless, nothing could hold me down.

“Forky, you’re really good,” he said to me as we walked to our cars. I tried to fight the sudden heat making its way to my face. Lately, compliments from him were hard to come by.

It was already late when O’Hare and Lau finally let us out, the moon sitting high in the sky. The night breeze crept its way into my thin jacket, causing me to hug myself to retain some warmth. Noticing my struggle with the cold, Jaehyun quickly draped his jacket over my shoulders. I was immediately hit with his familiar scent, it was almost overwhelming. I should be used to this, his action of sharing his clothes with me was nothing new but I was weak. It affected me every single time. I guess I was that head over heels for him.

Head over glass heels, one could even say.

“You’ve seen me in action before and I mean, I was chosen to be the understudy for a reason,” I gave him a shrug.

“Yeah but I’ve never seen you act and sing like that. Just...wow.” Stealing a glance at him, Jaehyun almost looked enamored with me. He was giving me a look that was usually reserved for someone else. I felt my heartbeat pick up in my chest and flutters in my stomach.

“Stop that,” I blushed, pinching his skin through the thin material of his long-sleeved shirt. A satisfying buzz ran through my body. Was he really looking at me like that? I was probably reading too much into it.

“No, but it seemed so real. Like you weren’t pretending.”

“That’s because I wasn’t,” I whispered under my breath as we arrived at our cars.

“Hmm, you say something?” Jaehyun asked, leaning closer to hear me.

Shaking my feelings away, I ignored the dull ache in my chest and acted through the tears I was desperately holding in. I wrinkled my nose at him playfully, secretly pushing the pain down my throat. “You really don’t listen to a word I say, do you, Jae? I said, I’ll see you later.”

“See ya, Forky! Get home safely!”

Scoffing to myself, I realized how much of a great actor I was. I deserved an Oscar or a Tony for the scenes I played out, the ones where I pretended to be okay when I was far from it.

What award do you ask? Best Actress in a Supporting Role— the best friend to Jung Jaehyun but never the love of his life.

Wardrobe fittings for productions were always an exciting day for the whole cast and crew. It was one step closer to putting on a show. Jaehyun was already dressed in one of his many costumes, a white suit with golden trimmings. It fit him for the most part, only tiny adjustments were needed. Members of the wardrobe department quickly pinned his neatly pressed jacket before taking it off his hands. Since he was the main character, Jaehyun was one of the first ones done. He was simply waiting for you to come out in your first dress— the white gown for the ball scene in Act One.

When you finally did all those minutes ago, Jaehyun swore his heart stopped.

Ten minutes ago, Jaehyun saw his best friend walk through the curtains. Your face was bare, hair still in that lazy style you always sported but your clothes. The comfy clothing you usually rehearsed in was gone and replaced by a beautiful ball gown. Despite the pins that scattered throughout the material to fit your form, it still appeared majestic. There you were, standing before him and the rest of the cast, and you were the loveliest you had ever been.

Ten minutes ago, you walked in and his head was reeling. Time slowed down as you tentatively made your way towards him. You did not meet his eyes but Jaehyun was dying to catch your gaze. He never wanted to let you out of his sight. The picture of his best friend in white was something he wanted to treasure and suddenly, the slowness around him stopped. The cast’s cheers and squeals disappeared. There was only you in that beautiful ball gown.

Was this the slow-motion moment you always talked about? The one you always dreamed about experiencing? Jaehyun could see why people thought it to be magic. It was almost like a movie, movie magic if you will.

Another look at you and then Jaehyun was in the future, watching you make her way down the aisle. A thin veil covered your face and he was so tempted to push it away from concealing your dazzling smile. His heart was fighting its way out of his chest, wanting to head down the path straight to you. How he wanted to reach out and touch you, cradle you in his arms.

You were truly an angel in white. A princess. A queen.

The mere sight of you took him to the skies, the one place he was sure you were from. Although Jaehyun would never admit it, he always thought you to be beautiful. Throughout the many years of being best friends, he would find his gaze subconsciously drifting to you. He would rip it away before you would ever notice him doing so, knowing you would tease the hell out of him for it— it was his own little secret tucked away into the corners of his beating heart.

“How do I look?” Your question snapped him out of his daydream and back to reality. Back down to earth.

“Sorry, what did you say?”

“Oh my god, you stupid spoon! I said, how do I look?”

“Lovely,” he answered sincerely, his brown eyes digging into your own. “You look absolutely lovely.”

Ten minutes ago, you simply murmured a question while Jung Jaehyun came to a realization. The realization that he might’ve fallen for you: his Forky, his best friend.

The loveliest girl he had ever seen.

With Cinderella’s opening night being only a few weeks out, you and Jaehyun decided to fit in extra time together to run lines and songs outside of scheduled rehearsals. That was the plan for every weekend and that particular Saturday was no exception to this plan. When his doorbell rang frantically, Jaehyun groaned loudly before getting up to answer the door. Did you always have to be so obnoxious?

Just as the door swung open, your loud voice boomed into his apartment, “‘Sup, ho! Ready to rehearse the hell out of this show or what?”

He stepped aside to let you in and you immediately made yourself comfortable in his humble abode. Jaehyun almost laughed as he watched you. There was a particular routine you stuck to when visiting his place. First, you would take off your shoes, slip on your personal pair of slippers you left at his house, drop your bag on the kitchen counter, and then open his fridge to raid his food supply.

Precisely as Jaehyun predicted, you waddled to the fridge in your memory-foam duck slippers and stole one of his yakults. He loved how comfortable you were in his home. It was truly a heart-warming sight. The act itself was extremely domestic and he quite liked the domesticity when it was with you. That flash of you in a wedding gown came back to him and he blushed at the thought. The idea of spending a future together was flooding his brain recently and he didn’t know what to do.

You weren’t the one he liked. Naeun was but why were you the only person on his mind? Was it wrong to have you in his mind? Naeun wasn’t his girlfriend— they were still getting to know each other. His time with her decreased over time since you had stepped into the role of Ella. He was very fond of you. He always had been. There was this little piece of his heart that was reserved for you but was it because you were his best friend or was it more?

Jaehyun quickly snapped himself out of it.

“First of all, I’m not a ho,” he said before grabbing a yakult of his own. He poked the straw through the foil a bit too harshly, the liquid splashing over the top. Damn his strength— now half of his drink was gone. “Second, stop slut-shaming me for my dating choices. It’s 2021. If I wanted to be a ho, I could be a ho.”

You rolled your eyes as you took a sip of your drink. “God, I hate you sometimes.”

“You need to stop lying to yourself, I know you’re hopelessly in love with me,” Jaehyun said, pointing his drink towards you. He caught you rolling your eyes at his answer.

“Oh, you’re absolutely right. I am irrevocably in love with you, Jung Jaehyun,” you said sarcastically, dramatically batting your eyelashes his way. Your confession, despite being a sarcastic statement, left his heart racing against time.

“Alexa, play Hopelessly Devoted to You!” you yelled ironically.

“Now playing Hopelessly Devoted to You by Olivia Newton-John,” an electronic voice boomed across his living room before the opening notes of the ballad began to play.

“Shit! I forgot you actually had an Echo,” you jumped, not expecting that at all. Jaehyun chuckled at your reaction, loving how easily you scare. He always thought it was one of your cuter traits.

“Alexa, stop!” he called.

Jaehyun ran a hand through his hair. He dragged his feet to his bedroom, knowing you would follow without a word. “I can’t rehearse today, I have to write this damned analysis paper for a class. It’s due in two days.”

“I’m sorry, is that paper more important than your best friend in the entire world?” you pushed from behind him.

“Yes,” he deadpanned, taking a seat at his desk. Jaehyun’s study area was an absolute mess. His notebooks were scattered around the floor, textbooks opened to random pages, and his laptop opened to a google document.

“That’s a motherfucking lie and you know it.”

“I really can’t rehearse now, Forky,” he sighed.

He glared at you as you theatrically fell onto his bed. The notes spread out on his bed flying to the floor. “Oh, woe is me! Jung Jaehyun cannot give me the time of day to rehearse. What am I to do?”

“Why are you like this?”

“I’m a theatre student, I’m wired to be this obnoxious,” you said with a straight face.

He stared at you through narrowed eyes. “I really hate you right now.”

“I know,” you countered with a flat tone. “But in all seriousness, Jaehyun. I won’t take too much of your time. I just wanted to practice our duets a couple of times and then I’ll be out of your hair. Plus, you look like you need a break.”

One look at you and he was a goner. How could he ever say no to his best friend?

“Ugh, fine.”

“Ha, I knew you would cave.”

“Shut up.”

The next hour with you was spent rehearsing the numbers. During the last run-through, Jaehyun suggested going over the blocking and putting their all in it. To act like it was opening night. You swiftly agreed and he played the music from the top.

Jaehyun led you around his room, spinning you across the floor as you sang. The smile on your face was so lovely, he could not take his eyes off your lips. His eyes fluttered to a close and he imagined you in your full costume, downed in your gown, as dainty as a daisy and as graceful as a bird. The thought of you dressed like a princess drove him crazy.

He never thought of Naeun this way. This was different. You were different but why?

Jaehyun opened his eyes to see you smiling so gracefully at him as the song was coming to an end. Just as planned in the show, your gaze flitted to his lips. You leaned closer and he followed, dipping his head to meet you halfway. His heart was skipping to its own beat as he inched down. Your soft lips brushed against his oh-so-gently as he held you in his arms but before the boy could press back, the door to his room swung open.

You broke away from him, shocked at the sudden arrival to see your other friend and Jaehyun’s roommate, Dejun. “Oops, was I interrupting something?”

“I, uh, I gotta go.” Before you could even stop him, Jaehyun grabbed his wallet and phone off his desk and ran out his room.

Confusion clouded his senses. Why did he feel empty after you pulled away? Why did he want to kiss you so badly? It was just a stage kiss.

Was it not?

Jaehyun’s door slammed shut behind him, leaving me and Dejun in his room. It wasn’t long before we heard the front door close, too. “Well, that was something,” Dejun said after his roommate shuffled out of the apartment.

“Shut up, Xiao Dejun,” I replied, smacking his arm.

My friend lifted his arms up in defense before he gave me a pointed stare. “I’m just saying, the two of you looked really into it. It looked great, to be honest with you. No notes to give here— I’m sure O’Hare and Lau would say the same.”

“It’s just acting,” I tried to shrug it off.

“Stop lying to yourself.”

“I’m not!”

“Bulltshit. I saw the way he looked at you— that’s not acting, twerp,” Dejun declared, his voice dropping. His voice never dipped in tone unless he was serious and in that moment, he was dead serious. My friend sounded like a frustrated tutor deliberately explaining a concept for the fifth time and I was the stubborn student who just didn’t understand.

“Yes, yes it is!”

“No, it’s not because that’s how he always looked at you!”

“Lies!” I yelled accusingly, “We got Liza Minnelli over here!”

“God, you’re so annoying sometimes! Why won’t you confess? Cat got your tongue? Nothing’s really stopped your sharp tongue before,” Dejun groaned at my stubbornness. He slapped a hand onto my shoulder. I tried to shrug him off but his grip was too strong. Maybe it was him trying to help me get a grip. Who knew? I honestly didn’t.

“It’s not like I haven’t tried, you know?” An exasperated answer left my lips. I was tired. So ridiculously tired of dealing with these feelings for my best friend. It had been four years since I fell for him. Four years of trying to see other people, four years of trying to confess, and four long years of failing every time. “I just freeze up like a deer in headlights or like you did when you performed that one monologue sophomore year in voice and movement class. Remember that, Jun?”

I felt his sharp glare burning a hole in my back. “You promised to never talk about that moment, you traitor,” he hissed, his hand squeezing the hell out of my shoulder.

“Okay yeah but you get the point, right?” My nails dug into his skin, leaving little indents onto his hand. He yelped, finally jerking his hand back to examine it. Shaking my head, I added, “Plus, he’s my best friend. I just can’t do it!”

“So, what you’re saying is that you choose friendship over the possibility of him loving you?”

“It’s just...I don’t know—” I started, shifting my body to face him, “—choosing friendship means that I’ll only lose love. But if I chose to confess and put my feelings out there, I could lose him as a potential lover and my best friend. I’m not prepared for that. I don’t think I ever will be.”

And there it was again. The self-doubt hit me, imposter syndrome resurfacing at an all time high, bringing me to the lowest of lows.

The feeling of being a fraud, of being not good enough.

For Jaehyun. For any love interest for that matter. For the role of Ella. For taking my place under the spotlight.

“Dejun?”

“Hmm?”

“Am I—am I good enough?”

“For?”

“I—I don’t know—” I stuttered as my mind was consumed by my own crippling thoughts. I tried to stay strong but the crack in my voice gave me away, “—for anything? Everything?”

“Oh, twerp,” Dejun said in that particular voice and then that was when the floodgates opened. The tears just came pouring down with no sign of stopping. My friend gently pulled me into his comforting arms. They were snug and I felt safe but not as safe as I did in Jaehyun’s hold.

“You, my darling, are definitely good enough. Don’t let your thoughts tell you otherwise.” Although his voice was comforting, it did not help the unhinged thoughts running through my brain.

“Then, why does it always hurt when I don’t get the role of the leading lady? Of his leading lady? I always get so far and then, at the end of the day, I’m just not what they’re looking for. What he’s looking for.” Pining for something so unimaginable was too taxing. Having the lead role in a play and having Jung Jaehyun wear his heart on his sleeve just for me.

“Sometimes, the roles aren’t made for you and that’s okay.”

“But what about this one?”

“This one, twerp, this one is a little different.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because there is music in you; it goes hand in hand with Jaehyun, like a melody to his harmony. You are his Ella and he’s your Topher,” Dejun urged. It was like he was begging me to not give up hope.

“You’re just saying that.”

“I’m really not. You just gotta do what the theatre gods tell us to do: just trust the process.”

How could I trust the process when all it did was hurt me by allowing me to have a glimpse of a love and a life that would never be mine?

Opening night finally arrived. Everyone was called to the theatre for a full run through in the afternoon: the final dress rehearsal hours before the doors opened and the curtains were drawn. I had gotten there earlier to soak in the calmness of the empty auditorium before the chaos began.

I heard heavy footsteps come from behind me. Even without turning around, I knew it to be Jaehyun. The boy took a seat next to me on the wooden prop walls that were locked into the ground. If the stage managers and props committee saw us, they would’ve definitely ripped our heads off but they weren’t— it was just us.

“Penny for your thoughts, my dear Ella?”

“Topher,” I answered, playing along with his game. “Lovely to see you here bright at early.”

“I knew you would be here and I wanted to be here with you,” he said, pulling me into a side hug. Jaehyun knew me well but did he know me well enough? “Spill it, Forky. What’s wrong?”

“Sometimes I still doubt myself,” I said a little too fast. A loud sigh followed my reveal. The crippling doubt was always there, haunting me. Let me tell you, it was not the best thing in the world to have during an opening for a new production.

“Oh yeah?” Jaehyun asked, pushing me to continue. I felt the soft brush of his palm against my hand. His fingers grabbed hold of my wrist before fighting their way to tangle with my own fingers. The sensation tickled, taking me away from my thoughts for a fraction of a second. I played with his fingers, watching the way his pinkish hand fit with mine.

I refused to look at him; I was too afraid of breaking down.“Doubting myself, my abilities. Always the understudy, never the star, remember?”

Jaehyun hummed. He rested his chin on my shoulder. “Did something change?”

“Yeah, I finally realized that maybe it wasn’t that I wasn’t right for the part; the part wasn’t right for me,” I laughed a bit dryly. “Does that make any sense?”

“Weirdly, yes,” he replied, his breath blowing against my neck. I tried to ignore the tickling sensation and the way it made me feel.

“But this is different— I feel like I was made to play Ella. Made to play her even though I got the part in this odd, unconventional way,” I turned my head to the side to avoid eye contact. “The girl who sees the good in everything despite the hardships and suffering she went through.”

“Without a doubt, I believe that you belong on stage with me,” Jaehyun answered sincerely, “and I’m glad we have the chance to finally play opposites.”

He squeezed my smaller palm in support. I appreciated the reassurance; the action slightly calmed me down before she took the next step. Possibly the biggest step of my entire life. “There’s something else I realized, too.”

“Oh yeah, what’s that?” Jaehyun asked softly.

Taking a deep breath, I said, “I realized that I could be right for you.”

It took him a minute, a long solid minute before Jaehyun could bring himself to respond to my confession. I wondered what he was thinking at that moment, when those words left my mouth. “Right for me?” came his tentative reply. A quick glimpse at his ears and I saw the burst of red. He was caught off guard, embarrassed.

“Yeah,” I said almost shamefully. Was I ashamed of my feelings? I never was ashamed before. Maybe it was because Jaehyun finally saw me for who I truly was— his highly dramatic best friend that was head over glass heels for him.

“How long— how long have you felt this way?” The red of his ears seeped to his rosy cheeks.

“Ever since we were a dumb pair of utensils,” I replied sincerely, my voice wavering at the truth, “a set of ridiculous tableware.”

There was an awkward chuckle that left his drying lips. I heard him click his tongue, a habit he did when Jaehyun never knew what to say. It seemed like I rendered him speechless. “Since we were sixteen? That long and you didn’t say anything?”

“You’re really asking me that?”

“Yes, I really am!”

“Jaehyun, c’mon. Use your brain! How was I supposed to? You’re my best friend and when you’re not my best friend, you’re out there chasing other girls,” I stopped to lick my drying lips. There was another inkling of silence and I gulped at how tense the atmosphere was. “And I thought maybe once, just once, you would chase after me, too.”

I almost laughed; my greatest desire was finally out in the world and it was greeted by silence.

“But what if I’m wrong for you?”

And there it was. The rejection I was preparing for. Giving him a pained smile that failed to meet my ears, I said, “Then that’s life, I guess.”

“You guess?”

“Well, I can’t make you act like you’re in love with me, can I?” I snapped, my pain taking the best of me. It clouded my brain, blocking off all rational thoughts out of my head. “This isn’t a play or a movie with a script, Jaehyun. This is real fucking life.”

Hurt. I was being overwhelmed with a wave of hurt and anguish. My body was trembling as much as my eyes were. I felt them growing wet and I shut them closed. My hands curled into fists, nails digging into my skin. It stung but not as much as being rejected by the one you loved most. The lead of the movie in your mind.

“Wait, no, that’s not what I meant,” Jaehyun tried to stop me from getting off the stage. I pulled away from him, quickly snatching my belongings before heading to the nearest exit. Turning back around before I left the empty auditorium, I experienced another moment in slow-motion.

There Jaehyun was in all his glory— denim jacket slipping over his broad shoulders, dark brown hair sticking up in all directions and a confused look on his face. He looked like a mess under the spotlight of my mind but nevertheless, he was my mess of a best friend.

He was my mess of a best friend and that was all he was going to be. That fact hurt more than being the forever understudy.

Why couldn’t I fast forward this portion of my life? Why must I suffer this much?

Why couldn’t I escape the role of being second best?

If only my life was a movie, then maybe I wouldn’t be everyone’s second choice. His second choice.

If we were in a movie, Jung Jaehyun would be my best friend and my perfect match. Our story would be the typical friends-to-lovers saga that every girl dreams of. It would end happily with the credits rolling to a perfectly timed soundtrack.

Too bad this wasn’t a movie— this was real life and life came with complications.

After that confrontation, you and Jaehyun were off and not off the charts— just off. The directors noticed it. The stage hands noticed. The cast noticed it. The final run-through before the curtains opened just finished and it was an absolute disaster because of the way you acted with Jaehyun. Every time he opened up his body to you, the response you gave him was closed off. Cold.

To the rest of the cast and crew, the prince and princess didn’t seem very much in love that day— they didn’t even seem friendly. You and Jaehyun seemed like two strangers trying to work their way across a stage. There was no connection. There was nothing else there.

Now, if only you would let Jaehyun talk to you, maybe something would change but you didn’t. You ran away every chance you could. It was like Cinderella, but you didn’t leave a glass slipper behind. You didn’t leave anything behind.

Less than an hour before showtime and he couldn’t even talk to you. Let alone look at you. He sighed into his hand, palms applying pressure to his eyes. Jaehyun cursed under his breath, forgetting that he had a heavy amount of stage makeup on his face. Looking into the mirror, he saw his makeup was still intact. Thank the theatre gods for the Ben Nye Final Seal Setter. It seemed like that it was the only thing set in stone at that moment.

The door to Jaehyun’s dressing room slammed open and Dejun waltzed in, fully dressed in his costume.“Dude, what was up with you and the twerp during that dress rehearsal? You were so off!”

He received no reply, Jaehyun was too zoned out to hear. Dejun hopped onto the counter of Jaehyun’s dresser. Usually, the action would shock the main lead but Jaehyun was too lost in thought.“Well, you know what they say about a bad dress rehearsal. That means we’ll have a good opening night,” Dejun said, eyeing his friend for his lack of response.

Finally looking away from his reflection, Jaehyun glanced up at Dejun with a look of disbelief. “She likes me?”

His friend jumped off the counter with widened eyes.“Oh my god, did she finally confess? Was that why you were acting weird?”

“Dejun, you knew?” Jaehyun slammed his palms on his dresser. The makeup products on the tabletop shook, leaving the other guy to wince at the show of strength.

“Honestly for being the ace of the theatre department, you sure are dumb,” Dejun replied a bit too casually as he leaned into the mirror to examine his appearance. He clicked his tongue upon realizing his cheeks didn’t have enough color. The stage lights would wash him out. The boy reached for Jaehyun’s pink blush and a clean wedge before applying it onto the apples of his cheeks.

“What should I do?”

“Well, Jaehyun, what do you want to do?” Dejun asked, turning side to side to double-check his reflection.

“I don’t know that’s why I’m asking you!” Jaehyun fired back with vigor, hating how casual his best friend was acting. He was having a before-show crisis and his best friend was calmly stealing his bottle of Ben Nye, spraying his beautifully sculpted face with the setting spray.

“Well, do you like her more than a friend? And what about Naeun?”

“Yes? No? I don’t know! But—”

“But?” His friend asked before hopping onto the countertop. The actor raised his perfectly shaped eyebrows at his friend and Jaehyun had the sudden urge to pluck the beauties they were until Dejun had no eyebrow hair left. When Jaehyun didn’t reply, Dejun repeated his question.

Dropping his head in his hands, Jaehyun hesitantly replied, “There was this moment when I saw her and it was like that thing she always said? The slo-mo thing?”

Dejun’s head perked up. “You saw her in slow motion?”

“Yeah, it was like time stopped. All I saw was her and then…” Jaehyun thought back to seeing you in a wedding dress. He changed his mind; he didn’t want to talk about his feelings. All he wanted to do was make sure opening night ran as smoothly as possible. Grabbing his white suit jacket for the top of Act One, the boy stood up in an attempt to escape his friend’s sudden peak in curiosity. “Never mind, this is ridiculous. I gotta go, Dejun.”

“No, you’re not going anywhere until you actually confront your damn feelings,” Dejun said, shoving his friend back in his chair. “Do you like Naeun?”

There was a pause before he answered truthfully: “Yes.”

“Okay, and are your feelings for Naeun stronger than what you have for your best friend?”

“No,” Jaehyun released another sigh as he leaned back in his chair. A hand reached up to brush through his hair before he remembered that it was gelled back in place. He dropped his hand to rub the back of his neck, not wanting to mess with his looks before places. “I was infatuated with Naeun but with her, god, she’s something else and it took me this long to realize it.”

“How do I know you’re not just saying that?” Dejun questioned, squeezing his friend’s shoulders a bit too tightly. Jaehyun thought his friend was testing him and for a good reason. If he was in Dejun’s position, Jaehyun would’ve grilled his friend, too. “How do I know you’re actually in love with her? Yes, you’re my roommate and best friend but she’s my best friend, too. I can’t let you hurt her if all you feel is something temporary. I can’t let you treat her like those other girls.”

“Because she’s The One, Dejun. I’m certain of it,” Jaehyun snapped back. “When I look at her, I see everything I’ve been searching for. It’s like I was blind for the longest time, you know? She was always just Forky to me back when I didn’t know any better. But now I see and all I see is her— her, with all her flaws. The way she hides her insecurities with her dramatic outbursts. How she picks at her cuticles when she’s nervous or how she always steals my food at home. And the way she just fits with me. I can’t explain it.”

Jaehyun didn’t even give his friend a chance to butt in. He was still rambling on with a fond smile, his mouth running a mile. “She’s been there with me since the beginning, Jun. Before I was this prince of the theatre department, she was there. She’s been there since the beginning and even when I was chasing after girls, she was there at the middle of it all, and fuck, I want to go all the way to the end with her.”

Dejun released his hold on his friend and rolled his eyes. The boy made his way to the door of the dressing room before mumbling under his breath, “God, what is with you two and giving out monologues? I swear, when this is all over, you should become playwrights.”

“What?”

“Never mind me, Jaehyun,” Dejun opened the door and gestured for Jaehyun to follow the path— the path down the hall that led to you. “What are you waiting for? Go get her, we have 30 until Joohyun calls for places!”

“Dejun, it’s much more complicated than that.”

“It’s only as complicated as you make it out to be. Just— just go and talk to her, yeah?”

Jaehyun sighed deeply as he reached your dressing room door. He knocked lightly, running through the lines he wanted to say in his head before you shouted a faint “come in.” The door squeaked open to reveal you, his best friend in the whole entire world, touching up your makeup. The best friend that he was inescapably in love with. You watched him through the mirror as he leaned against the frame with crossed arms.

“Can we talk after the show? There’s something I need to tell you— it’s important. I don’t think I—um, I have enough time to tell you now,” Jaehyun asked, stuttering through his words. Gone was the confidence he usually bared. The only thing left in him was a scared little boy, afraid of the problem his words may cause.

The smile he received from you did not reach your ears. “Of course,” you replied curtly before turning away from him. He noted how you were over applying your blush and fidgeting with your costume. You were doing everything in your power to avoid him.

The tugging of your ear, the biting of your lip, the picking of your cuticles. He saw all your bad habits. You were a ball of nerves and the speaker announced it was ten minutes before places.

“Hey, Forky?”

“Yes, Jaehyun?”

“You know that I believe in you, right? Always?”

There was a twitch at the corner of your lips. “I do.”

“Good,” Jaehyun approached you with caution. You watched him from your mirror, never making direct eye contact as he came closer. He dropped a kiss on the crown on your head, relishing in the way his plush lips against your torn bandana and the lace front wig. “Break a leg, my Ella.”

He observed you through your reflection and took in how beautiful you looked in your rags. You made the rags the costume department designed for you look like riches.

“Same goes to you, my prince,” he heard you answer in that soft tone. Again, you had sent him to the skies and the boy was struggling to find his way back down.

When it was time to draw the curtains and light the lights for the first performance of Cinderella, it seemed like everything fell into place. Jaehyun stared at you across the stage, falling for the way the lights illuminated your figure in that white ball gown. The bright glow brought his attention to your bright grin, that beautiful and radiant smile of yours, that shocked him to his core.

Jaehyun locked eyes with you and suddenly, he was drowning. He was drowning in your expressive eyes. He was drowning in your overflowing love.

It was different being across from you in front of a full audience. There was a rush that took over him whenever he saw you and it beat the flurries his heart experienced with his other leading ladies. As you said your lines with that bewitching sparkle in your eye, Jaehyun hated himself for not realizing how much he loved you sooner or how you were never playing pretend.

But that was okay because Jung Jaehyun loved you now. He loved you in the world you made believe on stage, where he was Prince Topher and you were his Ella, and he loved you in reality where you would always be the fork to his spoon.

Opening night went smoothly and the roaring applause I received during my final bow sent me to the moon. The way Jaehyun looked at me across the stage with eyes filled with pride and joy blasted me to places I had never been before. I became high on this feeling of being under the burning spotlights. The feeling of wearing the most intricate costume and the way his hand slid into mine for the last bow before the curtains were drawn; it was something I wanted to treasure for the rest of my life.

But with every high came a low— my low hit me when I ran into Jaehyun’s dressing room. I caught him in an embrace with Naeun who gifted my best friend with a rose. She placed a kiss on his cheek, causing his white ears to flush a deep red that rivaled the flower he held. The girl gave him a quick shove of the shoulder before heading to me.

Her congratulatory statement went in one ear and out the other. I could barely process Naeun handing me a rose of my own before she walked out of the room, the sweet scent of her perfume lingering in her wake. She gave my best friend one more lingering look as she left and it hurt me in so many ways.

“Ready to go?” Jaehyun said, clearing his throat. “Wanna stop by the stage first? Soak in your first opening night as a lead?”

“Why the hell not?” The walk back to the stage was short. It felt different somehow.

“We did it,” I whispered.

“That we did,” he answered back.

We walked onto the stage together and I could still hear the crowds cheering for me, giving me the standing ovation I earned. It was electrifying, the way the sparks ran through my body. It ran from the top of my head to the tips of my fingers and toes.

Glancing around the empty auditorium, I pondered aloud, “But do you know what sucks about it all, Jaehyun?”

“What?”

“There’s nothing worse than the feeling of not being chosen and it still hurts that I wasn’t the first choice,” I replied truthfully, “Not as much as before. But I’m learning to get over it. The casting directors saw potential in me.”

“That’s because you do have the potential to be a star. You’re practically glowing right now.” I felt his eyes trained on me, just like they were the entire time we shared the stage.

Turning abruptly to face him, I said, “You really can’t say that to me, you know?”

“And why’s that?”

“Because it makes my heart beat against my chest and these stupid butterflies come around before I remember that you have never chosen me to be your first choice,” I glared.

“But I do choose you,” Jaehyun pushed, his voice laced with desperation, “That’s what I was trying to tell you before you stormed off on me earlier!”

“Are you really choosing me, Jaehyun? The real me? The me that has been your best friend for years? Or are you choosing the me that shares a stage with you every night? The me that could potentially be your next whirlwind romance?” No matter how desperate he sounded, he couldn’t beat the hopelessness that was dripping from my own voice.

“No, that’s not it at all!” his voice boomed, the sound echoing throughout the empty auditorium.

“Then, what is it, Jung Jaehyun? Because I am tired of being second best and I’m tired of not being chosen,” I almost cried. The anguish was just taking over my body and I couldn’t make it stop. “Yes, I know some parts are not right for me but I can’t help but be hurt. And then you say that you’re choosing me? Of course, I’m going to think of it being because I’m your newest love interest on stage.”

“If you could just listen—”

Unable to stop the words from coming out, I just kept running off at the mouth. Everything I wanted to say to Jaehyun was flying out of my lips at rapid speed; I couldn’t even stop it. “I have seen you in slow motion so many times and I want to just fast forward from those moments. To speed past them so I can move on from the idea of not being yours. I refuse to be a temporary love that you lose interest in. I just want you to pick me, to choose me, and to love me, damn it— is that too fucking much to ask for? To be chosen and loved?”

While I was taking a breath to continue with my rant, Jaehyun cut me off and the words he said rattled the stage, the ground beneath my feet, and my whole entire world.“No, it’s not and you are way fucking more than that, if you just take a moment out of your godforsaken monologue and listen to me! I choose you not because you’re my leading lady but because you’re you. You’ve always been this— this incredible, breathtaking you.”

He took one step closer and I took one step back. “And you’ve the person at my side when no one else is.”

Every single time I would retreat, Jaehyun would follow. The boy was persistent, his brown eyes trained on me. “The one who figured out you loved me first while I was too blind to see it. You’re the fork to my spoon. We’re a set, we go together. And I was too dumb to figure out that at the end of the day, I always think about you and how no one I’ve ever been with compares to you.”

When my back hit the wall, I was trapped. Trapped in between his arms and the way they propped themselves on either side of my face. Trapped in the haze of his brown eyes and how they dug deep into my soul.

“I don’t see you in slow motion— I see you in fast forward. I see you in the future, my future, walking down the aisle in white and I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore. All I know is that I choose you. I will always choose you.”

I was trapped by Jung Jaehyun and there was no escape for me. Judging by the way his eyes never let me out of his sight, there was a chance my friend didn’t want to let me go either. He wanted me to stay.

“Jaehyun, what are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I love you. You’re my beginning, middle, and my end.”

“You love me? Like you’re in love with me?” Jaehyun heard you ask, like the possibility of being loved by him was so impossible. You were searching for any inkling of doubt but he made sure you couldn’t find any because you were the only thing he could see.

Jaehyun brought a hand near your cheek. It hovered there as he hesitated to touch it to your skin until you leaned into his touch. Your cheek felt so warm in his palm and it was so comforting to have you in his hold. “I wanted to say it earlier but I was just so scared of losing you as both a lover and a friend because what if it all goes to shit? What if we go to shit and things hit the fan? I can’t lose you.”

“But you, Jung Jaehyun, are in love with me?” you repeated as your hand cupped his own. The smile you gave him was bright enough to light up the stage.

“Yeah, I thought I made that clear. I’m sorry, did I mumble that line?” he teased playfully, trying to coerce a giggle out of you. “Should I start the scene over?”

“No, no. I’m just—” you paused and he watched you recollect your thoughts. His glittering brown eyes were trained on you as the words processed in your head. “You love me,” you laughed in disbelief.

Jaehyun took a step closer, his hand tentatively reaching out to stroke your face. He sighed in relief as you relaxed into his touch. “You’re my number one girl. I choose you.”

“Well, it’s a good thing that even after all this time, I’ve always chosen you, too.”

Once those words left your lips, he couldn’t hold himself back. Wrapping his arms around your waist, Jaehyun pulled you against his chest and smashed his lips against yours. Yes, he had kissed you on multiple occasions prior to this— onstage and off— but this time was different than the rest.

This was the first time he really kissed you after your feelings were out in the open.

The first time he kissed you and finally felt the love you harbored for so many years. Jaehyun just hoped you could sense the love he was pouring out for you, too.

He did not want to let you go but he was struggling to breathe. You were so lovely, everything about you was so incredibly lovely, and to have you in his arms was the best feeling in the universe. Everything around him turned dark and he felt the warmth of a spotlight and the flush of your body against him. The entire world was spinning beneath his feet, his heart racing, and his lips chasing you and only you.

Jaehyun did not understand why people did drugs— the high of being so ardently in love with another person, with you, gave him the high that he needed.

He felt you hit his chest in an attempt to end the kiss but Jaehyun did not want to stop. A light shove to his shoulders was enough to separate his lips from yours and what a sight you were— chest panting heavily for air, lips plumped and swollen, and the prettiest set of eyes widened in shock.

“You kissed me!” you said in between pants. “Like not a stage kiss but you actually kissed me!”

“That I did, love,” Jaehyun replied cheekily, taking another step towards you. You stepped back to lean against the wall but did nothing to stop him from coming forward. “Are you gonna do something about it?”

The look in your eyes changed after you heard his new nickname for you. It was coy. Flirty. Challenging. “Do it again, I dare you,” you whispered a bit too loudly.

Before Jaehyun closed the distance, his eyebrow perked up at the challenge. “Gladly.”

Senior year was there before we knew it.

Another year, another posting day.

Dejun, Jaehyun, and I swiftly made our way down the hall to the front of the theatre department, curious to find out which roles we were given. The spring production and the final musical of our college career was Disney’s Beauty and the Beast.

Callbacks for Belle went as smooth as ever— the chemistry between Jaehyun and I were off the charts. But why wouldn’t they be? We were together now.

Just like any other time, the crowds gathering around the cast list and bulletin board parted immediately once they caught a glimpse of Jaehyun approaching. The only difference was that this time, he was tightly clutching my hand.

When we arrived in front of the board, I shut my eyes before I could read the cast list. An anxious buzz flowed through my veins, tickling the tips of my fingers and toes. My boyfriend must’ve felt the twitching of my fingers or the sweat dripping off my palms.

I felt his body shift towards me. “Want me to take a peek first, love?” Jaehyun asked as he pressed his plump lips onto the crown of my head. He nuzzled his nose into my hair, a small but sweet action that always comforted me.

Shaking my head, I looked at him and said, “No, why don’t we look together?”

“On three?” he grinned lovingly.

“On three, you dumb spoon.”

The countdown was quick but the glance I took at the cast list was even quicker. It was so quick, I almost didn’t catch who was put into the role of Belle. Taking a double take, I let go of Jaehyun’s hand as my eyes zeroed in onto the tiny print.

Everything around me came to a stop as I read and re-read the cast list. Everyone around me was celebrating their parts but I couldn’t hear them, they were all muted in my mind. All I could hear was the sound of my own breaths and all I could see my name on the top of the page.

Belle……………..Y/N The Beast……..Jung Jaehyun

“Oh my god, I got the part,” I whispered to no one in particular. Backing away from the board, I repeated the same words a little louder and it got the attention of everyone surrounding me. Before I knew it, everyone threw a congratulations my way. The cheers were loud and obnoxious but they were for me because I did it. I finally did it.

Feeling a little overwhelmed, I backed away from the blustering crowd before bumping into my boyfriend’s firm chest. Jaehyun caught me in his hold, his arms circling around my waist. He dropped his chin on my shoulder and placed a tender kiss on my temple. “Would you look at that? We’re not a ridiculous set of tableware this time.”

“No disrespect to those parts, they were awesome, but I think I like this a lot more,” I giggled, turning in his hold.

As I circled my arms around his neck, he whispered, “Same here.”

I yanked him down into an earth-shattering kiss that sent the world spinning beneath my feet. It slowed down, speeded up, and it did everything in between. I saw flashes of yellow ball gowns, royal blue coats, and Jaehyun smiling at me gracefully across the stage.

Jaehyun staring me down from the other end of an altar.

I saw it all.

If my life was a movie, then this would be the time that the screen would fade to black and show the names. Some overly poppy song would resonate through the speakers and everyone would get up from their seats and gush over the happy ending.

But it wasn’t. My life was as real as it could be and it was even better than any romantic-comedy that would ever grace the screen.

This wasn’t the ending.

This was the perfect beginning.

AUTHOR’S NOTE. hello, my darling readers! you really didn’t have to wait that long for this release, did you? a big thank you to several people: @johtenrecs for always being my beta and for the helpful feedback, to my chaotic gc ( @smoll-tangerine, @ppangjae, @jaedore, and @jeongvision) for listening to me complain about how i was losing it while writing this fic, to @suhpressed for helping me with brainstorm, and lastly, to my lovely @notnctu bc without her and our crazy idea of hosting a hannah montana collab, i wouldn’t have gotten this idea! love y’all! hope you enjoyed this and please leave feedback! uwu

TAGLIST. @yasmini24 @jaehyunnie77 @emmybyeakitty @fluffyjaes @aevizen @dearjaehyxn @yourmagnanimousholiness @jaehyvnsvalentine @keemburley @softieus @lanadreamie @lebrookestore @notmangojuice @felixn-recs @captainsjoongs @anotherfullsun @ukiyoneo @kunrengui @babyyynatty

#nctsworldfwc #neowritingsnet #cznnet #nct scenarios #nct fic #nct imagines #nct x you #jung jaehyun #jaehyun #jaehyun imagines #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun x you #jaehyun fic #jaehyun fluff #jaehyun angst

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ellitx · 3 years

Text

Chapter 6: Sentiment

𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁

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art belongs to rome

word count: 3.5k

The weather today is a kind that feels like a kiss of summer without the fiery heat of the noontime of the sun. The grass is a soft green that almost has a hint of blue and in the sky is enough pristine white cloud to show you how beautiful and perfect the sky was.

The concrete of the path was warm under your bare feet. You stopped and closed your eyes so that you could just focus on the sound. There it was, the singing of a lyre, how could anyone not say that was music?

You opened your eyes and let the daylight flood back in, bringing the perfect weather back into focus. You stretched out your arms, moaning when you heard the small sounds of your back cracking in satisfaction.

You looked down at the pile of apples on the ground, grabbing one and observing a drip of water tracing its curves. The fruit glowed rosier than they did in the day shine. The branches of each tree spread out as if so proud of the bounty they brought and the sweetness had given within each one.

It was wet and crisp when you bit into it, it broke between your teeth with a soft crunch. The lingering sound drifted around your ears, filling your heart with pleasure. Icy sweetness filled your mouth and for a moment, the world went still, as if a wave of content had drifted past and frozen the world solid.

You kept on chewing, biting until it was all gone. You went to grab another until a voice called your name.

“[Name]~”

The whiny voice of Venti reached your ears causing your hand to stop midway to get another bite of the fruit. You hummed at him to let him know you’re listening, still focused on the sweet taste lingering on your tongue.

“Stay here with me.” He pouted and patted his lap in motion for you to sit on it. The way he looked at you expectantly made you giggle and accepted his offer, not before you grabbed two apples to bring with you.

You flopped between him and laid your head against his shoulder and looked up at him with a radiant smile. “What is it?” You asked as he messed with the ribbon tied on your dress. He nuzzled on your shoulder and slithered his arms around your waist pulling you close to him.

His hair tickled your skin once he started attacking you with kisses from behind. A short gasp came from you when you felt his hand roaming under your dress. The sensation of his fingers trailing over your skin made you close your eyes tight in embarrassment as you immediately halted him by grabbing his wrist.

You looked over your shoulder with a frown decorating your face. An apple was shoved to him making him fall on his back as he groaned in pain and rubbed his nose to ease the bump.

“Ouch…” You folded your arms over your chest and pursed your lips as you pinched his arm. “O-o-ow!! [N-Name]! It hurts!” Small tears can be seen from the corner of his eyes as he pleaded for your mercy to spare him.

Huffing in exasperation, you let go of him and pulled your knees close to your chest while staring at him in skepticism. “Since when did you become such a pervert?” You mumbled and watched him fix his hat.

It was true though, Venti has never done that to you before. It just surprised you to see him become so touchy with you after what happened. You didn’t mind his kisses and hugs, but him wanting to go further was what you didn’t expect.

His spirits lowered and gently rested his head on your shoulder before whispering an apology. He just hopes you’re not so angry at him and you’re just playing around. Making you mad is the last thing he wanted.

He eyed the apple laying on the ground before taking it and wiping the fruit with his sleeve. The apple’s skin sits smoothly on his palm, the sweet taste awaiting for him to bite onto it.

It occurs to you in a fleeting thought, the apples gathered here would surely attract your little wisp friend. “By the way,” you started, catching his attention. You brought your knees closer to your chest, the arms that were wrapped around it had tightened. “I met Barbatos yesterday.”

His shoulders tensed at the familiar name, blinking at you in utter astonishment. “Y-you did?” He stammered and looked back at the red fruit in his hands to distract himself. Your head bobbed in response to his question, tilting your head towards him that he finds it rather cute.

“He actually accompanied me the whole day while you were gone…” Your mind drifted off as you absently played with the strings of his lyre, creating an improvised melody.

“I see… It’s been a long time since I’ve last seen him.” His laugh sounded rather strained. He bit his lip and looked anywhere else but you. He would be lying if he said he doesn’t feel anxious and nervous to see where this conversation is going.

“I’m really relieved to know he was well and safe. I was actually hoping the three of us could be together again, but…”

Your words sunk and you furrowed your brows, delicate hands ceasing from playing the lyre. “After you came back, he was gone all of a sudden.” He swallowed the lump that was sitting in his throat, his heart racing in each second that flies by.

A slow and deep exhale was what he did to calm himself. It took him a lot of courage to look at you and gave a reassuring smile that he’d hope it’ll work and wash away your worries.

You blinked and looked up at him in surprise when his hand caressed your head. Your eyes shining in wonder and innocent curiosity made his heart melt. He would’ve kissed you right here and right now if not for him to remind himself that you’re worried about the little elf’s whereabouts.

“He’ll come back to us. I’m sure of it.” There was amenity in his smile, a gentle and kind one you observed. It was the smile of one who soothed with ease and told you everything will be alright.

You blinked at him before giving a smile and nodding in agreement. A tired sigh was drawn from you and you fell into his lap, facing his stomach. “I’m just worried if Barbatos is angry at me.” Your muffled words didn’t go unnoticed by him as he raised his brow at you.

“How so?” Slender fingers played with the hem of your ribbon tied to your hair while he paid attention to you, taking in your sweet voice inside his head. “I mean when I told him to stay put he doesn’t want to listen. I don’t mind that he follows me everywhere, but I-I was supposed to dress!”

He almost choked after hearing what you have said. His whole face was flushed, remembering the time how he badly wanted to be with you while he was in his original form. He can feel your hold on him tightened and buried your face even further onto his stomach.

“He was also eyeing me from afar, so I don’t know if he was glaring at me or not…” That was it. His shoulders were shaking from either embarrassment or amusement. Everything around him felt still and quiet like the world had turned frozen in a minute.

He could only focus on how warm his cheeks are and your face pressed against him. His brain almost short-circuited once your digits were teasingly trailing from his chest. Your middle and index finger start a walking motion until they’ve reached his arm, drawing some figures on it.

Venti’s eyes flickered whilst he covered his own mouth to hide his blushing face from you, even though you weren’t even looking at him. However, curiosity got the best of him. He wanted to know more what you think of his wisp form and wanted to indulge himself a bit with your presence next to him.

“He’s just worried about your safety.” You shifted your body letting your back rest against the ground and looked up at him. Your eyes would wander to observe his features, absently staring at him until he called your name to bring you out from your tranced state.

You reached for his braided hair and played with the tips, the sharp ends brushing your skin that made you want to take off his hair tie and redo his braids again. “You sound so sure about it.” You stated as you lift yourself to sit properly next to him.

“That’s because I’m absolutely sure of it.” His lips brushed your temple, giving it a small peck before smiling at you. You puffed your cheeks to express your slight vexation of how nonchalant he is about Barbatos.

Is he not worried about him? Why does he seem unperturbed that the little elf wasn’t here? You’ve known them for a long time now and the two of them are always together side by side. It feels different seeing them far apart from each other…

He was taken aback when you scooted forward from your seat, your faces together were so close he could feel your breathing brushed his skin. Your intent gaze made him nervous that he had suddenly lost the ability of speech.

His mouth is bone dry, letting out a shaky breath when he feels your chest pressed against him with your hands clutching on his shoulders. Your lips moved near to his ears just as you whispered, “Are you hiding him from me again?”

The moment he realized he misinterpreted your actions, your words, your expression formed; he scoffed at himself for assuming such things. You saw the shock plastered on his face before it was gone in a second.

An amused smile was present on your face, guessing you were right after all. A feeling of triumph filled your system, it’s really amusing to see him show this kind of face to you. You’ve never seen him look this surprised before and you’re just so proud of yourself you were able to finally tease him at last.

You stifled down your giggles and brushed the tear that fell from your face as you pinched his cheeks to wipe out the frown. “I’m just kidding. But if you ever did that, I won’t forgive you.”

Venti glanced over, the corner of his lips fighting a smile and his eyebrows slightly raised. Your mirthful giggles had halted when you saw how his eyes glinted with mischief. That playfulness visage was already spreading from his front and you have to look away before he could do anything to you.

Unluckily, he tackled you on the ground, the edges of his mouth tugging upwards that formed into a smirk that made your heart race. You sensed your whole body was heating up and you might have melted right in there when he grabbed your wrist and placed it above your head.

You knew you were already in trouble from the first you started teasing him, the friskiness lurking on his lips and eyes wasn’t hard to be overlooked, even a child can observe it without difficulty.

“Oh? And if I did, what would you do about it, love?” His face was dangerously close to your neck, his warm respiration that had unknowingly caused your body to titillate. Curse this man for making you feel like this so easily.

You pushed his shoulders away to create space between the two of you as you pout, your whole face was so warm that he even had the audacity to invade your personal space to make it worse. “I’m going to ignore you if you seriously hide him! How dare you hide such a cute creature from me!”

“Hm…” A sharp gasp slipped from your lips when he tilted his head and kissed your neck, sending shivers down your spine. “So he’s cuter than me?” He asked while his hand rested on your hip.

“O-of course! Much cuter than you. So small and fluffy and his little jingles are really adorable to listen to.” Your eyes skipped over to look at the tree, evading his intense gaze as much as possible. Your heart can’t take this extreme intimacy and if you wanted him to get off, the only way is to push him in which he only kept himself still.

Maybe you shouldn’t have said that. Venti went quiet all of a sudden, you can only hear the winds blowing and the chirping of the birds from the forest. His fringe was covering his eyes so it was hard to take a look at him, that is until he dropped his head and settled it on your shoulder.

“…ly?” You tilted your head at his fainted words while he nuzzled close to you.

“Eh?”

“Do you really mean that?”

You don’t know what’s going on but he turned clingy all of a sudden. Sneaky arms surrounding your waist that surprised you and his short locks caressing your skin as he rubbed his cheeks with yours, whining your name.

“Well… yes.” You answered with a heave of a sigh. The male grumbled and pulled you towards him, switching positions with you; your thighs are now straddling him while he looks up at you in adoration from below.

You’ve already lost count of how many times you’ve blushed on this day. Just how shameless can he be and not be unfazed with this kind of position?! Why is he so calm about it?! These things are what your mind can only think of all this time that baffled you so much.

Maybe you should ease up a bit. He’s always been craving for your attention and you thought it was already enough, which is actually the opposite. He can never get enough of you and he wanted and needed more. Be it a kiss, a hug, or just even simply singing a song with you.

He actually does hope he wanted to be more intimate, but he won’t ever say that out loud in front of you. Just seeing your cute and shy reactions from his sultry interactions already satisfied him, so when you placed your hand on his chest with a flushed face it made his rate even go faster than he could ever imagine.

He was indeed blessed to have this view from you. The way your lashes flutter from your eyes, those shy glances you keep giving to him, and the quivering of your lips excited him. His impulse kicked in and told him to just kiss you already and lavish you with his love endlessly.

Before you could draw your mind from its far places, his arms were around you, reaching behind your head to pull you closer to him until your lips made contact with his. Your hands hastily grabbed on his shirt to prevent yourself from falling off, shutting your eyes tight and allowing him to hold you close to his body.

You felt the rush of helplessness, the sinking yielding, the surging tide of warmth left you limp. The quiet and burning face of yours was blurred and drowned into nothingness. He bent back your head and kissed you, softly at first, and then a swift gradual intensity that made you cling to him as the only option in your hazy world.

The urgent and needy kisses were back once again, his insistent mouth was parting your shaking lips, sending wild tremors along your nerves, evoking from your senses you never had known you had a capable of feeling.

The sweet flavor of the apple still lingered that he can still taste it from you. Both of you drowned yourselves in from this heated kiss, your nerves tingle with excitement and anticipation as he touched you so gently and passionately.

He was so attracted to you with the kind of heady trance that brings attention like precious jewelry. You, with just the right blend of sweet and shy, are perfect to his eyes, every part of you is flawless and immaculate.

Your gaze slid to the side when he pulled you against him. His nose tickled your ear as you let out a tiny gasp and squirmed uncomfortably. You didn’t anticipate for him to handle you so intimately, so when you felt his lips graze your slender neck, your whole face heated up.

You summoned enough courage to look at him. His turquoise eyes twinkled in pleasure and excitement, drinking in the expression that was currently donning your face. Oh, he knows, and he’s intentionally trying to make you feel like this.

You’re going in for a long day with this impudent bard.

—

Venti approached you slowly and pulled you closer to him wrapping his arms around you from behind. His embrace was warm and his slim arms seemed very protective when wrapped around your small form. The world around you melted as you squeezed him back, not wanting the moment to end.

You stretched your arm forward as you observed your hand. His eyes followed what you were doing, watching in slight curiosity.

“Your hands are actually quite small, [Name].” He commented whilst he hovered his hand next to yours to compare it. You stared at his own, eyes gleaming in concern when you noticed his skin color.

“Your hands are so pale, Venti.” The brushing of the skin as your hand connected with his was a surprise to you when you felt his palm was actually quite rough. “Are those calluses?”

The male hummed in affirmation as he rested his chin on your shoulder, watching you play with his hand with yours. “It’s so weird how yours are bigger than mine.” You muttered with puff cheeks, eyes squinting at the small size differences between your palms and his.

A small chuckle was elicited from him, enjoying the soft sensation of your hands touching lightly against his. “Isn’t that normal?” The tone of his voice was more of a matter-of-fact than a question.

His eyes widened in surprise when you enclosed your fingers from the gaps of his digits, intertwining them together. “I totally thought they were smaller…” His heart fluttered like the wings of a hummingbird, slowly lacing his digits with yours as it tightened a bit once they were finally connected.

He can faintly see the tips of your ears were red from behind, even when your hair covered it if you looked down below. A pleasant silence filled the air, his ears were gratified with the faint lullabies of the little birds. He stole a glance at you to observe your shy behavior, registering your cute expression inside his mind.

“I… I love you.”

“Eh?”

“Your hands! I love your hands, they’re— they’re nice!”

The frantic beating of your heart was so hard you felt it would escape right out from your chest. It pounded against your ribs as if trying to fulfill a thousand beats. It was so obvious to him that you were blushing profusely, your nervous fidgeting greeting his vision when you played with the ribbon tied to your hair.

He almost barely heard what you have said if not for his sharp ears that easily caught your words. The color infused his cheeks with a smile that started to bloom on his face and warmed him, his eyes shining in a way that only deep happiness can only bring.

Venti suppressed a smile. He could tell from your blush that you seriously liked him.

“I-I was just thinking how much I love them!” You swiftly interjected before he could get any different ideas. “The calluses you have, they’re from the lyre, right?” You asked and absently clasped his hand even more.

“They are.”

A sudden weight was settled on your shoulder surprising you. You looked over and you were only greeted by the dark tousled hair of his. His breathing brushed the nape of your neck as he muttered unexpected words that made your heartbeat louder than ever.

“I love yours too.”

He glanced down at your linked fingers, adoring how your hand fit perfectly with his. There’s a kind of redness that emits in him, a type of longing to the eyes and the delicate sweetness within. It shows a connection, that the smile and yearning come from some deep emotion in him.

His heart warmed at the idea of them finally being together. It was the first time he heard you say “I love you” to him. When his ears picked up those three words, it brought such joy and bliss inside him that words aren’t even enough to describe how he’s feeling right now.

He can’t help but let his smile widen, his stomach churning in delight and euphoria that he finally got to know your feelings towards him. He tightened his hold on you and shot you with a smile that was all adoration, just the right hint of softness, a crease at the corner of his eyes.

He lifted the intertwined fingers near to his lips, grazing it to the back of your hand, finally uttering out the words to return your feelings.

“I love you too.”

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact venti x reader #yandere genshin impact #yandere genshin impact x reader #yandere genshin x reader #genshin x reader #venti x reader #yandere venti x reader #genshin impact fanfictions #yandere #yandere genshin #genshin impact reader insert #genshin impact venti #venti #elliwrites #Illusory Sense

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stellar-lune · 3 years

Text

*KOTLC incorrect quotes*

Anyways, a long list of incorrect KOTLC quotes, feel free to use these for anything if ya want!

Glimmer: Arson? Oh, you mean "crime brûlée".

Fitz: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, its “intelligent” and “really cool”.

Fitz: But when I do it, I’m “petty” and “need to let it go”.

Keefe, holding up his class notes: And then this doodle of a burrito because when I first read Aristotle, I thought it was pronounced like “Chipotle”.

Marella, in shock: Wait a minute, is it “Chip-o-tottle”?

Sophie: I wasn't hurt that badly. Elwin said all my bleeding was internal, that's where the blood's supposed to be!

Police Officer: You have the right to remain silent.

Marella: I choose to waive that right!

Marella: *screaming*

Brant (whoops sorry bout this one): Do not come over to my house. If the house is on fire you may knock once, if I don’t answer assume I set the fire and I want to burn to death.

Sophie: I would never say that my best friend is a bitch and I don’t like her. That’s not true… Biana is a bitch and I like her very much!

Lex, Bex, Rex: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.

Keefe on Tuesday: *glues a dime to the sidewalk* Heh heh heh.

Keefe on Wednesday: *walking down the street* Ooh hey! A dime!

Forkman, to the squad: And remember, if I get harsh with you it is only because you’re doing it all wrong.

Keefe, tearing up the room: Where are they?

Keefe, looking under a pillow: Who moved them? Who moved my children?

Keefe: Somebody moved my E.L. Fudges, and now I am going to run away again.

Tam: Your existence is confusing.

Keefe: How so?

Tam: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to you upsets me.

Sophie: I have one foot in the grave but in a kind of fun flirty way, the way one might slip on a fishnet stocking.

Linh: I've never encountered a problem that can't be solved by an spontaneous musical number.

Dex: Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle, and explode into bats to get out of all social situations.

Sophie: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor and it isn't fair. You shouldn't need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities.

Sophie, playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win you should have tried not being poor.

Dex, to Stina: If karma doesn't hit you, I fucking will.

Sophie: My life isn't as glamourous as my wanted poster makes it look.

Dex: If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one, Wonderboy.

Marella: As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

Fitz: I'm a firm believer in "if you're going to fail, you might as well fail spectacularly."

*out grocery shopping*

Linh: *takes a free sample twice*

Linh: Robbery and fraud. I am a Rebel (TM) .

Sophie: Sometimes I wonder if I’m hearing voices.

Sophie: Then I remember that’s the last bit of sanity I have trying to get me to fall asleep at a reasonable time.

Sophie: Does anyone know how to relax? Asking for a friend.

Demon: Hey, I took your soul last month and-

Tam: No returns.

Demon: *sobbing* But it's making me sad...

Dex: So, according to my university, it is, quote, “my responsibility if there is an internet outage to contact the faculty and the department.”

Dex: Now, if you’re a critical thinker like me, you might be wondering one thing.

Dex: HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO EMAIL THE DEPARTMENT?!?!?!

Tam: Hey, what’s the name of the other guy who lives with Tiergan?

Linh: His cats' names are Walter and Rose.

Tam: That's not what I asked.

Linh: That is all the information I have.

Keefe: Ro, remember when you said you weren’t going to interfere with my love life?

Ro: No, that doesn’t sound like me at all.

(alternatively, Alden)

Linh: Ayo, what the FUCK is this?!?

Tam, sitting down, surrounded by corpses: I won Mafia, that’s what.

Marella: I'd roast you, but my mom says you can't burn trash.

Marella: *slow-mo walks out of the room*

Biana: I'm gonna get my piolet's license. I've already got a driver's license and a cosmetology license, that's two of the big five licenses.

Fitz: The big five licenses?

Biana: Driver's license, cosmetology license, pilot's license, fishing license, and… license to kill! I can't wait to get that one.

Dex: You are irrationally angry 365 days a year.

Fitz: Well, that’s just your personal opinion, I don’t have anger issues. Biana, do you think I have anger issues?

Biana: Well, I wouldn’t really call it an issue. An issue is something you can fix.

Keefe: So how’s the food Sophie made?

Fitz: It's great! Compliments to her.

Keefe: *goes to the kitchen*

Keefe: You're adorable.

Sophie: *blushes*

Biana: And now for a gay update with Linh and Marella.

Marella: Getting gayer.

Biana: Thank you, Marella.

Sophie: Hey, do you know the password to Keefe’s computer?

Biana: I love you, Sophie.

Sophie: Aww, that’s so swe—

Biana: No, you misunderstood, the password is "iloveyouSophie".

Sophie: Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.

Fitz: Hey, Biana, are you free on Friday? Like around eight?

Biana: Yeah.

Fitz: And you, Tam?

Tam: Umm... yes?

Fitz: Great! Because I'm not. You two go out without me. Enjoy your date!

Biana: Did he just-

Sophie: Do you cook?

Biana: I made a cake once.

Fitz: Yeah, it was good.

Biana: Really?

Fitz: Don’t make me lie twice, Biana.

Dex: Nice rock.

Keefe: Thanks, Tam gave it to me.

Tam: I threw it at you!

Keefe: Isn’t he the sweetest?

Juline: I just had a long talk with the triplets about hitting and now they are yelling “it’s my turn to perpetuate the cycle of violence” before hitting each other.

Sophie: I made you all playlists!

Sophie: Tam, yours has only heavy metal and punk, and is dark like your soul.

Sophie: Keefe, yours has sad songs and blues to pair with your crippling depression.

Sophie: And Biana has the ABBA Gold album.

Fitz: A pessimist sees a dark tunnel.

Biana: An optimist sees light at the end of the tunnel.

Dex: A realist sees a freight train.

Tam: The train driver sees three idiots standing on train tracks.

Mr. Forkle: For self defense reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely.

Biana, Keefe, & Sophie: Okay.

Mr. Forkle: If you don't want to die, give me all your money.

Biana: Bold of you to assume I have money.

Keefe: Bold of you to assume I don't want to die.

Sophie: Bold of you to assume I can die.

Sophie: My life is a little too much panic and not enough disco.

Keefe: My life is a little too much fall and not enough boy.

Dex: My life is a little too much chemical and not enough romance.

Marella: My life is a little too much imagination and not nearly enough dragons.

Biana: What’s it like being tall?

Marella: Is it nice?

Sophie: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards?

Fitz: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb four chairs, two boxes, a small coffee table, and six oddly placed stools to get what they want.

Stina: You have friends and I envy that.

Marella: You're welcome to share my friends.

Stina: *looks at Dex and Sophie*

Stina: I don't want those.

Della: Tommorrow's garbage day.

Fitz: I can't believe you made a whole day dedicated to Alvar.

Linh: Bottling up negative emotions is bad for your health, so you shouldn't do it.

Tam: I know, that's why I bottle up all my emotions, both positive and negative, so it cancels out.

Linh: Th-that's not how that works-

Marella: Do you want to know your gay name?

Linh: My... my gay name?

Marella: Yeah, it's your first name-

Linh: Haha. Very funny Marella-

Marella: *gets down on one knee* And my last name.

Linh: Oh- oh my god.

Glimmer: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.

The Black Swan: Those are wanted posters!

Biana: Are you mad?

Tam: No.

Biana: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?

Keefe: Astrology is fun because i can pretend that all of my behaviors are just a result of being a Gemini and not symptoms of mental illness.

Biana: Being a Gemini is a mental illness. That’s not hate it’s just a fact.

Biana: *on the phone* Hey Fitz, do you know my blood type?

Fitz: Of course, it's A+.

Biana: Oh, I guessed wrong. Excuse me, nurse-!

Fitz, to Sophie: Are you ready to commit?

Sophie: Like, a crime or a relationship?

Literally Anyone: Hey, aren’t you Sophie Foster?

Sophie: You a Councillor?

Literally Anyone: No.

Sophie: Then yes, I am.

Sophie: I typed "bitch" into my GPS and guess what? I'm in your driveway.

Stina:

Sophie: Vroom vroom, come out already.

Stina: I’m gay—

Sophie: Not what I meant, but cool.

Keefe: Remember that time you dared me to lick a swingset?

Sophie: No, I said "Keefe, don't lick that swingset" and you said "Don't tell me what to do" and licked the swingset.

Mr. Forkle: I’m not so sure you’re stakeout material.

Sophie: I’m a chronic insomniac, I was born for this.

Juline: I only have two emotions: exhaustion and stress. And I’m somehow always feeling both simultaneously.

Marella: *gets set on fire and screams in agony*

Marella: Nah, I’m just kidding. Fire does nothing to me.

Biana: Maybe the true treasure was friendship all along. But I hope not, because I can’t spend friendship on new clothes

Dex: Do you want to play 20 Questions?

Fitz: Sure!

Fitz: Whats your favorite color?

Dex, laser fucking focused: Triangle. Do you like men?

#kotlc shitpost #kotlc incorrect quotes #kotlc memes #kotlc sophie #kotlc dex #kotlc fitz #kotlc marella #kotlc linh #kotlc biana #kotlc tam #kotlc glimmer #kotlc black swan #kotlc neverseen

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project-paranoia · 3 years

Text

Live Watch: S.C.I. Mystery Episode One

I enjoy camp because I've always enjoyed analysis and examination. I enjoy looking at something from all sides, testing it with my fingertips. When I was a child I would sit for hours just looking at something until I had it all held in my mind and I felt like I understood it. Camp necessitates that understanding the way that imitation and - good - parody requires it. To quote Susan Sontag - who articulated what camp is so well - Camp is "a sensibility that revels in artifice, stylisation, theatricalisation, irony, playfulness, and exaggeration rather than content." Because of this camp takes on head to head gender, sexuality, expectations, any sort of defined norm and sequins it up then shakes it down until understanding comes out. When understanding something there are three major ways to work your investigation - what it is, what it's imitation is - the close but not quite, and what it isn't. Camp handles all three, to quote again: "Camp sees everything in quotation marks. It's not a lamp, but a 'lamp; not a woman, but a 'woman.'"

Why are we talking about camp? Because SCI Mystery is some of the best kind of camp outside of drag or screaming about wire hangers. It deals a lot with mental illness in a way that would destroy a serious show, but in this one "mental illness" is a metaphor for being marginalised and a way to talk about the mouse and cat in the room. This show is about being queer. About being gay loudly and quietly, about resisting specific labels and needing them, about the threat of a cure and the blessing of acceptance. All the messy realities of queer life as varied as queer people. Like Lil Nas X's Montero, you can appreciate the effort without being comfortable with it. While the show's allegory of mental illness when many queer people are still told they are ill is done well and there is reason to the choices and tone, things are said which can be hard to hear. Knowing they're there because they're hard to hear and have been heard doesn't help everyone.

With all that said, it's also a fun, silly bl drama. Don't let the analysis scare you off. While the information about camp can be something to be aware of, all this show requires to be enjoyed is a willingness to be amused and spooked in turns.

You know the drill, spoilers below!

* I have memorised the youku sound, I have a triggered response with it. Not all triggers are bad, this one reminds me of Guardian

* Welcome to episode one where we just leap in! But don't worry, one of them has a cute earring and they are colour coordinated.

* Watching from youtube the episode is 38 minutes long while most of the others are 45. Attach whatever emotion you want to that fact.

* The exposition is handily delivered by asking a question which tells us some things, thank you show, I appreciate it

* First episode and he's already giving his partner an in case I don't come back letter to be opened if he dies

* Wait for me!~ Go!~~

* Slow walk with dramatic music: 1 (don't make this a drinking game You Will Expire) this time with bonus almost looking back

* I've seen a similar shot on Hawaii Five O

* Don't explain what's happening, just knock everything over with a jump kick in some absolutely spotless white tennies

* Running with dramatic music with bonus looking back: Does it count? We have yet to hear back from the judges

* They leap into the water with an explosion behind them, we are less than 2 minutes in and I love that for them

* At first I thought the boats were making a big heart before I remembered that I am very silly and they are not doing that

* This one is going to be long

* I can see his pockets through his trousers, why are his trousers so thin?

* It's not kissing to dramatic music in the surf if it's CPR

* Each story line has its own intro and that's very sexy of them

* Slow walk/dramatic music: 2-6

* These people are totally goofy and and yet the Seriousness

* Two Weeks Ago!

* The police school bus has arrived to shoo away the crows circling around Dr. Zhan staring (dramatically) at the body

* Sport scar policeman dresses even more unprofessionally than Zhao Yunlan who at least looks like a detective who was jumped by so many criminals he just gave up wearing a suit and went for jeans. Chief Bai's clothes are so thin, I'm under constant anxiety someone is going to tear them off.

* Also several of the cast pictures on MyDramaList look like the pictures your auntie insists taking to send to your other aunties and I love that for them

* Triple axil spin from the victim, the judges are loving it - this is the camp I'm here for

* The dramatic slo mo and music budget for this show was so big, just as it should be

* He's mad because he's angy

* Master Psychiatrist can tell all about the killer from crouching by the body, it's a trope and this is one of the few places I like it because it serves the show instead of the show serving it

* When you're almost boyfriend is going away for reasons and it's not your decision but you can't go with him because of your job so you're just low key bitter about it

* "You can't control me"

* The pettiness between these two

* Professional women who worked hard to get where they are still are constantly obsessed with boys according to most cdramas

*The male posturing in those three second has accidentally circled back around to being gay in the way those bro shows accidentally do and I love that

* I live for this 80s-90s police chief perm

* The Pettiness

* I always tend to like doctor characters, I don't know why. Even when they aren't my favourites I like them.

* She's kind of adorable, I like her (I've seen a lot of this show and every time I say I like someone it ends badly ;-; )

* "the victems"

* If you love Creative English, this is the show for you!

* Chief Bai's crew is trying so hard to get them back together

* Dr. Zhan is so good at psychology he can tell what someone looks like from some tire tracks - this trope is used all the time in crime shows, but they push it a little farther in SCI and it really helps the viewer know what the rules for the show are

* The scene in the psychiatrist's office hearkens back to queer coded villains and the way they're treated in old black and white horror cinema - but done so artfully it's almost invisible. It's incredibly well done, and the awareness of tropes and types all throughout the series is tremendously successful as much as it's campy fun.

* There's also the trope of someone who manipulates someone into feeling like they've been "purified" and then weaponises them against the "filthy". And of course the fact that the killer's blade is a mirror - that he's killing in others what he sees in himself. This trope hasn't just been queer-coded but has been applied to any sort of physical or mental disorder. Thesis have been written about this trope and the anxiety attached to it. I can't write them better and this is long enough, it's just a small part of the excellent handling of the themes showing up in this genre and I wanted to point it out because it deserves appreciation for the skill and knowledge in the writing.

* The whole you need evidence vs you're saying psychoanalysis isn't trustworthy feels very much like a coded angry exes discussion

* I love the establishing shots, so good

* He kind of deserved that door to the face, what was he even doing

* Police violence in crime shows is supposed to be a release for the viewer, but many countries have issues with police violence so it hits wrong. Here it's far more performative in a way that at least has some awareness

* The weirdest phone call, you call someone to tell them something important and they say two things to you and hang up

* The tongue thing, why always the tongue thing?

* When a serial killer tries to compliment you by calling you a carnivore and you shut down the whole alpha male supposition by calling yourself a vegetarian

* At this point I've written almost fifteen hundred words and taken almost two hours to watch 23 minutes

* This is my life, these are my choices

* Dutch Angles

* You could make this conversation about being gay, I have had this conversation about homosexuality before

* Unfortunately while I had it I was on the bus trapped in a window seat

* The conversation didn't end with me saying something cool and everyone clapping

* They just got off the bus to go to work

* The banality of evil, yo

* Her shorts are Incredibly Short, good for her

* "arrest the perp behind my back" that's his job, broheim

* He doesn't ask why she checked behind their ears

* DUN dun dun!

* Slo mo file drop, and of course the file is blood stained and aged

* Chalk Art of Doom

* Chinese word play!

* Caught almost putting his coat over his crush, embarrassing XD

* Backstory!

* I love all the little character details, I could quote lines I think are funny all day but that would start getting silly

* Bai Yu Tong is marked as clean and having OCD but we don't see what's apparently a huge character trait at all other than the all white, do love that he's good at cooking

* Dr. Zhan: Brilliant! Genius! Cannot feed himself.

* Dr. Gong has indifference level 100% which is true and also I love that for him

* I love that Wang Shao part of the team because he's good at making friends, I love that for him

* Poor Zhao Fu: scared of ghosts and dumb and sweet? At least he has an 8 pack

* Jiang Lin is very tropey except the mention of her nearsightedness

* Ma Han's height 1.7m and legs 1.8m is hilarious and I love it

* I stopped recording the slo mo walks, but if you were drinking along with them you might be dead so I really appreciate you taking time out of your afterlife to continue reading. We appreciate all our ghost readers

* And that's the first episode! Thanks for making it to the end!

#SCI Mystery #SCI谜案集 #watchthrough #let's watch

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y0ung-4ever · 3 years

Text

Perfect

Pairing: Kim Seokjin x female reader

Description: It’s an early morning, when you and Jin decide to cook breakfast together. Well, at least try..

Warnings: Fluff, smut, Jin being the perfect human being he is..

Rating: Mature

Note: I hope you all enjoy! This is my first time ever writing smut so I hope it’s not that bad!

Days like sipping warm tea on the balcony of an apartment in the city of Seoul can compare to nothing. Except when you share that apartment with a deviously handsome man.

The screen door slides open, a tall Korean man stuck his head out into the spring breeze, his purple tinted hair blowing with it.

“Good morning, my love~”

I smile like a kid on Christmas Day, getting hugged by their parents.

He yawned and lifted his arms and he walked the rest of the way out onto the slab of concrete. When he did as said, his loose fitting, transparent white shirt lifted up to where you can just see his belly button and a slightly tan stomach.

“You know, I love it when I wake up to my future wife not in the bed next to me..”

I look into his eyes, he seems a little sad.

“I’m sorry, love..”

I get up and wrap my arms around his torso. I feel his chest rise and fall as he breathes.

“If you are really sorry, you have to help me with breakfast!”

I giggle at how cute he looks when he’s upset. I tickle his sides and his mouth forms into a smile. Oh his smile..I could look at his smile forever and never get tired of it.

“Okay, lets go make this amazing breakfast!”

I unlatch my arms and start to lift my foot up to pass the step to get to the other side of the door, when I feel two strong arms wrap around my stomach and pull me back. Warm air blows onto my neck and then two lips plant a kiss onto my sun kissed skin. Moving their way up onto my jawline, then my temple. Jin’s hands rest on my waist and he takes a deep breath.

“I love you, y/n. With every bone in my body.”

His whispers so soft. I turn my body around, I timidly lift onto my tippy toes, reaching his already still lips from the warm air. Now inches from them are my own, my left hand behind his neck, my right index finger and middle finger latched onto the waistline of his black skinny jeans, I push his head down and our lips connect, it’s just like how it happened the first time. Filled with love and passion. I couldn’t ask for a better life.

As soon as I slowly pull away from the lustful kiss, I set my feet back into place and smile.

“I’m still so in love with you it’s like I’m falling all over again, y/n..”

He breathes. I grab his big hand with my small one, tea cup in the other, and pull him in the now lit apartment due to the sun rising.

We reach the kitchen, as I let go of his hand I go to wash mine. My small feet stuck to the hard floor, the water is warm but not too warm, the way my sensitive skin likes it. The sudden smell of coffee brought joy to my nose. I take my cup, of now cold, tea and wash it out with the same temperature of water, the stickiness latching onto my hand. I start to scrub my right hand then my left, causing my skin to get irritated. Jin’s soft skin soothes mine as he gently rubbed the stickiness away with his thumbs. He grabbed a towel and turned off the flowing water, he wrapped my red hands in the pastel pink hand towel and rubbed them softly, I always tend to blush at moments like these, just because he knows that little things like this are the best.

He puts the towel onto the counter and walks over to the fridge. He has fuzzy socks on so he slips and slides across the floor to get from one place to another. I giggle as I crack a few eggs.

“Promise, promise me~”

Jin always sung while cooking. That’s one of the reasons why I love cooking with him. He stopped spurring words and hummed along to what he started.

He was fixing some ramen in boiling water, adding spices to them and occasionally tasting the noodles to see if they were soft enough. He turned off the stove, the heat light stays put. He sets the hot pot down on a heat mat and takes off his baking mitts. He throws them onto the counter and turns around to meet my gaze. This whole time I’ve been admiring his movements. From his hands to his feet, his hips and his mouth. Everything about him takes my attention.

“What’s wrong, honey?”

The names he calls me still take me by surprise.

“I’m just admiring how amazing you are. You are the definition of perfect, Jin do you know how perfect you are?”

It’s true though, everything he does is perfect..

He picks me up, lifting me on top of the counter. As soon as my butt lands on the surface, he puts his big hands on my thighs. He leads them back and pulls me forward, making me in closer proximity to his body. He leans in and whispers in my ear,

“Trust me, there are many things that aren’t perfect about me, babe.”

I smirk, his hands rubbing my thighs, I pull him in by his shirt collar and lick my lips.

“I know one thing for sure you’re good at, love~”

He leaned in slowly, our lips barely touching, I pull him closer and feel the embrace of his lips on mine. My hands travel to his hair, tugging and messaging. He groans, I know how much he loves getting his hair played with. He pulled away roughly, breathless, he started to unbutton my sleep shirt, it was pastel purple with little kitty cats on it. Button by button it reveals my white bralette. The shirt slowly falling down my shoulders, he put his hands on the sides of my torso and that’s when it hit me, the hotness of his hands was so soothing, it made me crave more of his touch. I look up from watching his hands trace shapes on my stomach, as I reach his eyes I stopped, his eyes focus in on mine. I pull him closer by his collar,

“Remind me how good you are..I think I forgot..”

I whisper and my lips become magnets, attached to Jin’s. I unbutton what’s left to undo on his shirt and the silky cloth reveals his toned stomach. I rest my hands on his chest. I bite my lip and slowly run my fingers down to his waist line, he groans as I smirk. I inch his dark pants down inch by inch until I see his boxer line. He lifts my chin up, kissing me and resting his hands on my neck. He finally takes off my shirt and throws in onto the cold floor. He admired my tanned body as he tapped every sun spot left on my shoulders. He leaned down, and his warm breath spreads on my skin, he kisses my shoulder and then down my arm. My hand was in his and he kissed it as if I was a princess. He puts his hand on the middle of my back and leans forward, me going down, his hand giving support. He starts down at my waist line and leaves wet, hot kisses up until he reaches my bralette. He slides the straps of my bra down my shoulders and kisses my chest. He goes up to my neck, kissing my Adam’s apple, going up my neck, reaching my chin, then my plump lips. Jin has always been the one to take the foreplay the most seriously. He wants me to feel wanted and loved. He kissed me slowly as he unclasped my bra and he slowly pulled it off, he then went from my lips to kiss my breasts, taking his time by planting a kiss at least five times all over each one.

“You are so beautiful, y/n..”

he stopped for a quick second and went back to leaving the warmth of his mouth all over my body.

Jin seems like he is type to say how handsome he is and how he is known worldwide for his handsome face, but off the stage and in his personal life he is really self conscious.

“If I'm so beautiful, than that means you are perfect, Kim Seokjin.”

He stops kissing me and lifts his head up to eye level with me. He smiles and shakes his head and looks down, tracing hearts on my thighs. I lift his head up with my hands on either side of his head.

“Jin..You are perfect. There is nothing wrong with you.” I whisper.

“Only God is perfect, y/n..” he mumbled and smiled at me. His I love you so much grin.

“Then are you God?” I pull his face closer to mine.

“If I was God than I wouldn’t be thinking of all the things I could be doing to you right now instead of arguing about how beautiful you are.”

I giggle as he leaned in to kiss me. His kiss was long and passionate. As we were kissing, I could hear the metal of his belt hitting the counter. I smile into the kiss and I feel his throat vibrate, signaling that he growled at my action towards him undoing his belt.

He lifted me up quickly, my back eventually collided with the soft surface of our bed. The covers were a cool white, the sheets were pastel pink, I had a little stuffed RJ lying on the right side of the bed. He slid his silky shirt off his shoulders, he was going to unbutton his pants but I stopped him and undid the buttons. I pull his pant line down and he takes over, he pulls down his pants revealing his ocean blue boxers with little yellow stars dotted around. I giggle as he pushes me back down onto the bed, and he grabs the hem of my shorts, pulling them down ever so gently and his fingertips grazing my skin as doing so. I’m holding myself up with my elbows, watching him closely. Once my shorts are no longer on my body, he crawls onto the bed covering me as his body is on top of mine. He grinded on my body ever so slightly making me wish that this would never end. He spread my legs so he could be between them, looking into my eyes, as if trying to read my thoughts.

“May I?” He asked. I smile and shake my head. His eyes go down to my panties. He slips his pointer fingers on either side, pulling them down.

“I love you, y/n.” He says.

“I love you too, Jin.”

Once I say his name, he takes off his boxers and pulls my waist closer to him. He looks at me, making sure I’m okay with it. I smile at him with reassurance. He slowly entered. Going as slowly as possible to not hurt me. We have done this only once before, he is always so busy with his music and is always on tour that we can never have a good amount of time to love each other like this.

He rubbed my thighs once again to make sure I was okay.

“You can move, baby.” I tell him.

“O-okay, love.”

He starts to move at a slow pace, then as time goes on he moves faster and soon enough I started to feel the pleasure. I moaned slightly louder than I wanted, he groaned at that, leaning his head back as he proceeded to thrust into me.

“Y/n..” he moaned.

He leaned down and kissed the underside of my breasts, wanting to leave something there as a reminder that you’re his, he left a few hickeys. As you felt the pressure build up in your stomach, you screamed at the pleasure. Your hands flee to Jin’s hair and you immediately tug at his purple hair.

“I’m close, y/n..” he groaned.

“Me too, Jin-“ with that he released his grip on me and pulled out, his load shot out onto my stomach and he leaned down to make contact with my throbbing clit. He started to finish what he started with his mouth. As soon as his tongue entered it sent me over the edge and I came.

He licked my clit clean from the orgasm and came up to my lips and kissed me. He leaned into the kiss, deepening it. I smirk and cuddle into his chest. He covered you with the comforter and got up off the bed. He found his boxers and pulled them back on. He pushed a piece of hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead. He left and came back about 10 minutes later with a plate of eggs and a bowl of ramen. I smiled as he sat the dishes on the table next to me.

“You should finally have something to eat, darling.” He held my hand.

“We should fix breakfast more often..” I giggle. He laughed and took some ramen between the chopsticks and held his hand under them, I opened my mouth and he fed them to me.

“I want to tell you something, y/n..” he sat the chopsticks down. He took my hand again and my smile faded.

“What is it?” I spoke.

“I’m not going back on tour until next month. So I get to spend all my time with you until then.” He smiled lightly. I opened my mouth, shocked.

“Really?!” I yell.

“Yup!” He smiled, his eyes closing. I jumped up and wrapped my arms around his neck.

“Here.” He says, handing me my shirt and panties. I grab them and put them back on. I lay my head down on his lap and think of all the things we could do on his break.

“We could go on vacation! We could go to..” I look up, trying to think.

“What about we go to Hawaii?” He says, holding up two plane tickets. I gasp and slap his arm. He laughed and I hugged him.

“As I said, you’re perfect Jin.”

#bts #kim seokjin #jin bts #jin x reader #bts fluff #bts smut #:) <3

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pepsicup · 3 years

Text

Chaotic Commentary: We Have Always Lived In The Castle

Welcome to my thought process when I watch movies!

The arrival of a cousin with ulterior motives threatens the claustrophobic and isolated world of two sisters and their uncle. (Oooof, bitch. I already know Sebastian is gonna look damn fine in this movie.)

Watched: April 22nd, 2021

Opening

Alrighty, right off the bat, the opening music giving me very much throwing it back at summer solstice 1531. Might fuck around and show some ankle, who knows

Um miss girl, first off all, i know damn well you aren't wearing a stark white shirt and capris shorts after labour day. And secondly, you gotta work on your self care babygirl, you are looking rough

Okay, so noted; there is clearly something off about this girl because i know when i personally rummage through family keepsakes, i don't have a hannibal look on my face

I don't know if you guys know this but your house...it needs a little 5 minute crafts, diy, extreme makeover: home edition treatment

Ohhhh baddie alert, baddie alert, baddie alert. That chick’s silhouette already got me acting up. Yes sink low to the ground girl, drop it down for me

Short monologue before being cut in half by that creepy ass stare, gotcha. I literally needed more nightmare fuel, thanks bestie

‘A change is coming, and nobody knows it’ how much more change can you get, your house is literally in shambles girl one battle at a time

First Act

Ah, here we are, title screen. Very cottagecore.

Timeskip: What did happen last tuesday, I must know...the suspense is suffocating

I’m not one to judge, but that record doesn’t sound like a life-coaching audio.

Oh heyyy there's a kitty!

Yes hun, that is a working tap, your telekinesis is redundant. Eleven from stranger things eat your heart out.

Alexandra! Babyyy Daddario! Step on my face or domesticate me into a housewife, i beg of you. The uncle tho, he isn't it.

Chill out Mary, you’re just running errands. Why is she walking in a slow-mo naruto run like that. She is giving me a schizophrenic Napoleon Dynamite vibes.

Wait...is her name Meerkat?

Oh, its Merricat...nah i like mine better lmaooo.

Her inner monologue is making cackle because it sounds like a Gabbie Hanna original piece 💀

Okay what i got from the coffee shop scene was Stella is also a grade A baddie, I want to commit double homicide on those two douches, and i want to invite miss meerkat to my lunch table because awwww. She's just different leave her alone.

Wow, the village folk really know how to talk shit huh? Well, I can eat rats like all of them for every meal of the day, plus snackie snacks. Go fuck yourselves, thoroughly.

God that family needs to smoke some weed or something. Why do I feel like the sisters are about to kiss...and the uncle sounds like he means risky business. Very bad vibes here, back to you in the studio.

Ooooh, miss daddy really knows how to roll her tongue huh? Again, very much cottagecore ‘history says they were just really good friends’ aesthetic. And so many bops in this movie, kinda feel the need to throw it back or do the renegade.

Why do I feel like this next scene is just a posh episode of gossip gorl. Sipping tea and spewing nonsense. Rum cake? No thanks, babygirl. Oh but here comes uncle wanky, whisking away Lucille with his talk of arsenic.

Yes. Speak 8 course meal to me daddy...fuck, now I’m hungry. Okay the uncle isn’t so bad I guess, very poetic and philosophical. Yes, very nice. Sucks that he was roofied and turned to a professor X cosplay for solace, though.

Timeskip: Last Thursday huh? We are in for a rollercoaster folks.

*she glares in rhubarb pie and possibly shelved jam*

OH MY GOD ITS HAPPENING, I SAW THE SIDE/BACK OF HIS HEAD AND MY HEART STOPPED. He has a very nice shaped head, yes, pleasing to the eye.

Hi sirrrr, I have a pocket full of horses, trojan and some of them used. Pls let me ride you in the little red corvette. Pick me, Charles, choose me, love me.

Real talk, I feel so bad for Mary Katherine (I literally almost typed Gallagher at the end lmaooo thanks molly shannon) she is obviously struggling with something and Constance looks like she is very traumatized.

But I still think there’s something not right about Mary. Miss girl no one walks like that (thats a lie, it would probably be me after a night with Bucky barnes) and I love me a little witchy goodness. But not enough to start locking up my bedroom like it’s Area 51 and having secret rituals at my super exclusive, diy bohemian temple in the middle of the woods.

OH MY FUCKING GOD PLEASE SPARE ME FROM THE FEELING I JUST FELT IN THIS ROOM ON THIS VERY DAY IN APRIL, MAMA FUCKING MIA

when he stood up—bitch I’m gone, I’m his whore now. Sorry, I am owned by this man. Bye I was literally launched off earth for a moment there, kinda chillin’ in dead space, standby.

Okay I took a break for a moment. I’m cool, I’m collected, play button is a go. NOPE, GIRL MY MOUTH IS FOREVER OPEN, AND I DUNNO IF I WAS MY BODY TELLING ME TO KNEEL IN FRONT OF HIM OR WHAT—SOMEONE HOLD ME

Current state: I am hugging my knees and wasting away under my blankets. I paused and played and paused and played because I cant go more than 2 seconds of looking at him.

Okay, I’m all good.

All I keep saying is no...no ...NO, louder and louder every time he opens his mouth, ‘got a hug for your cousin?’ um not a cousin but yes, right bitch for that job present for attendance. Here ✋🏻

Girl I’d run like the wind, too, this kitty isn’t gonna dry itself, nyuuuooom, double time! Fall in, Rogers. Gotta keep up. 🏃🏻‍♀️

Timeskip: Last Friday night, yeah we dance on table tops and we took too many shots, I think I gave Charles a blo-oh-job, whoops—

Ah, see I knew there was something fruity about Charles, hopefully he kisses a boy in this. Would love to see that.

Uh oh, the way he just pops that fruit into his mouth...I fine, I’m totally fine. Mentally I am... the way he chews if making my oral fixation quake

‘now that’s a handsome cat’ sir if you don’t—he wonders why he is such a fucking meme, this is why Sebastian.

‘Jonassss’ which one of the brothers, tho?

Ah yes, the best of friends; Meerkat, Frankie Jonas and a middle-aged Carter Baizen. Ugh mega sad that this is the closest I will get to see Charles pet a puthycat though.

Why don’t you slap my ass like a flapjack pancake, Charles. You won’t.

OMG so quirky 🤪when you steal his shirts 🥺🤪🥰

Who the is venice, Charles? Who, who, what are you, a fucking owl? WHO’S VENICE AND WHY IS SHE YOUR FAVOURITE?! sorry i had to get that out of my system, iconic cinema shall not be overlooked.

all this commentary is fresh from my chicken breast brain by the way

All i heard out of that little inspirational, facebook-esque speech at the dinner table was was shoes. Also peep Frédéric Chopin banging in the background noise, a little Nocturne Op. 9 No. 2 to keep party goin’

Charles...that is your cousin.

It isn't a PHASE, Charles. Let him be emo over his dead brother and great tragedy of losing his legs then gaining the likeness of sir patrick stewart. Therefore, he will not forget.

Oh...i’ll sit down i guess.

I COULD LITERALLY—...I could literally watch him eat for the rest of my life pls sir have murthy

Grocery boy...hmmm reminds me of a yee ole jingle i heard in my youth. What can i say, I’m a connoisseur of the classics my friends.

Sidenote: I’m getting vietnam flashbacks to singing ‘carol of the bells’ at the elementary christmas concert. I am overstimulated. And not in a good way.

Charles...do not add that newspaper clipping of your cousin to your personal spank bank, pls.

Timeskip: Last weekend, alright. What did we do; brewski’s with the boys? Hockey night in canada? one legged race? I’m dying to know...

Very nice form charles, you’ve almost dug right through the wood. A real mans-man here if we are being honest. I’ve never in whole life seen a construction crew do better than Charles Blackwood.

I could watch him do this all day.

Pearl necklace huh? Me too, girl.

‘I’m beginning to think, that my spells no longer work’ 8-year-old me, sitting in a bath full of salt and a charm bracelet of rock candy dissolving in the water after my fifth attempt to transform into a mermaid

Aw, but i would sit out there and eat a sandwich with Meerkat. Hell yeah, we can go halfsies on a BLT no problem 😢

oh...

oh no...Charles.

Here is my first sexual grievance, the way he carried that sack over his shoulder, mmm yes i have been fed most wonderful nutrients. BUT NEXT?! THE TWO FINGERS LINE AND THE FUCKING MOTION HE DID AND SAYING SHE WASN’T GOING DEEP ENOUGH PLS

what is with this man and gold...alright debutante Lance Tucker simmer down.

And the ‘hot’ thing, ‘needing a bath’? miss daddy is working it in for her cousin real hard, sweet home alabama all summer long

HEY LET'S ALL GO SWIMMING IN MY POOOL, AND BY POOL I MEAN BATHTUB, AND BY SWIMMING I MEAN SEXXXX--

Oh, so there’s this ominous whistling, nice, a blade kink, cool, and Charles serving body audi audi audi audi all the damn day. Hi sirrrrr. God i just love his chest, man. Its just so buff. He looks this good for what? And in front of his cousin...ew? um child, anyways so

the way my stomach clenched in the most uncomfortable way just shows that my body doesn't care about my comfort when it comes to thirsting and simping. He didnt have to look at her like that or fucking back her out

oh to be a chair...

esteemed audience member sac is a little tired of hearing cousin charles and cousin mary call each other cousin charles and cousin mary

Charles, eat your fruit and shut the fuck up. But also, hi sirrr.

I see you, Constance, I see you...tig ol’ bitties 👀

Timeskip: It’s Monday without the benefit of a sebastian stan, full frontal nude scene...smh

baby, just give up on the step and go fondle some plants please, i’m begging, stop at once. or, i spoke too soon?

If i have to hear sebastian say constance one more time i am going suck down all the arsenic i can find...he just says it so weird lmaoooo i hate it

Climax (make it happen, Charles 🙄)

Aw i love fruity, coffee shop, car men AU’s

that shot of him looking over his shoulder single handedly sent to into a spiral...what the fuck are you doing to me, Charles.

uh oh...one of the car men is madddd

OH OKAY WELL, WELL, FUCK ME, WELL

why dont you just come up behind her and literally growl in her ear what the fuck, Charles. I swear sebastian plays his characters just to make women go feral sometimes.

Sir! Sir! This IS A WENDY’S, SIR, THAT’S YOUR COUSIN--

NOT THE MILK CARTON

PLEASE I’M LITERALLY KILLING MYSELF LAUGHING, WHY IS HE DRINKING IT LIKE THATTTTT

that little ‘aahh’ at the end when he drank it all got me, oh my fucking jesus. Hold on i need a minute, my stomach hurts from laughing my guts out.

Oooof but the eye-contact and the expressions are computing mega well to my chicken breast brain so fanfics will be written and sin will be committed so help me lord jesus on the cross almighty, amen (sorry i’m ex-catholic, its just my go-to)

pfffft that is so iconic, Mary is literally gathering sticks in the pitch black woods while Charles basically puts down his own wood for her sister to pick up on fjgrebgnuierijiojfd, i’m dying

why does he have to pull that poetic, sensitive stud act...just give us the goods charles, slap someone i’m begging you

This is like star wars all over again, they served head-on into on-coming incest traffic

*holds up finger guns* sir, ma’am i’m gonna need you to put your hands behind your heads and get down on your knees exactly 8.92 feet apart, this is a citizen’s arrest

but, i too would like to slow dance and make plans with him. Maybe we’ll go deep in the garden with two fingers on top of the rhubarb, maybe we will commit arson, who knows...

Meerkat continues to be my every mood, she really said:

Timeskip: Oh shit, its tuesday ya’ll, grab your party hats it’s about to get funky

Charles, if you don’t shut the fuck up and stop yelling out her name i will suffocate you between my thighs, electrocute your arm until it falls limp and shoot you with a grenade launcher, don’t make me do it

And yes, am i currently squirming in my seat because of the way he is smoking the pipe and hollowing his cheeks, what about it?

Second Act

Yes baby girl! you trash that room like ozzy osbourne and tommy lee did to that motel on tour in 1982. Go, Meerkat, go!

Charles holding those sticks in both hands is the equivalent to a 1-year-old holding those little cocktail weenies, it has the same energy and i’m dying over it

Try to tell me it's not the same picture:

You can't.

Oh shit, its getting heated now. Mary’s in trouble.

Everything isn’t making sense at the same time its all coming together, i am confused, frightened, a little bit horny, but mostly just entirly overwhelmed. Mom...can you come pick me up, i’m scared.

Oh my god! knew it! i knew i knew the actor that plays the uncle, he's the creepy thin man from charlie's angels! Wowza, what a world.

Oh no...i’m flashing back to vietnam again, the fucking bells dude i’m tellin’ ya. There is so much going on, i feel everything but nothing at the same time, help...

NOOOO HER ARTSY BOHEMIAN WITCH COTTAGECORE JARS! THE OUTRAGE! SHE CANT CAST SPELLS ANYMORE, HER POWERS ARE LOST!

a CURSH! NOT A CURSH!

What in the criss angel mindfreak is going on in here on this day? Who are they? And why is the broad such a bitch...oh is she the mom? My bad. Pops seems nice though. Yes, indeed.

Awh, hiii frankie jonasss. 🥰

Oh here we go with the eating again. If i have to see him flex his jaw one more time i’m gonna go feral. And on the usual, loud and obnoxious noises like the ones he is making when he takes a bite, or chew or swallow food/a drink like the who fucking milk debacle. But he just makes it okay? Maybe its just my eating disorder bias coming into play but how can someone be sexy while eating, or smug? Like huh???

‘Why dont you like me?’ WHY DO YOU CARE CHARLES, GODDAMN IT

Is he playing the sad boi card reallyyy? You want someone to say thank you? Put yourself to good use then. I can think of a lot of ways you can use that mouth better than going on these strange mini-monolgues like some tortured writer with a kink for control...and breatheee

And she’s back with the Eleven telekinesis, sweet kat that is a meer you have running water! Pfft she is actually dressed like eleven too, like what. Oh wait did i just uncover the plot?

Breaking News: Eleven holds a whole town hostage.

Jesus with Charles eating, Mary getting the sudden urge commit arson, miss daddy looking so fucking fine that i would literally throw myself in front of a bus just to get her attention, and uncle X with his weird theatre act: my blood pressure must be through the roof

Wow hes got a temper, but poor connie, shes a hot mess lmaooo

Oh god...oh god okay this is happening, oh wow, you didn't even get through dinner first charles jesus. Listen, i never give choking up on the first date but if i had the chance...i don't want any sausages other than his, i said what i said

and it keeps going?? ummmmmm i ummmmmm, i don’t have words. I was not warned of this savagery and i don’t know if i’m going to be able to write for anyone other than Charles for a whillllleeee, hun, apologies

Good to know he also uses his super soldier senses in another universe to sense a fire deep in his loins like the dramatic king he is

Now he is driving away and laying on the horn, nice

Oh ho ho, yessssss my coffee shop baddie, my black coffee queeeeeennn Stelllaaaaa. She said, Superhero mode real quick.

ummmm uncle x with the sick mustache...thats certain death? I mean if you are into that sort of thing, have at it.

Okay still driving, people are crying over the bed burning into dust, the heavily disable man is still smoking the good stuff...got it.

Big red truck go Honk, Honk.

Oh here come all the old, white men. Lovely.

‘oh-hooo yeah, thats a fireeeee’ as far as old white men go, that was pretty fucking funny to me

Yeah its gonna be in the arms of the angels real soon if you girls dont get the fuck out????

‘We’re firemen’ and i’m a homo, you want a gingerbread cookie or something? put out the damn fire PLEASE 💀

Ummm you’re too late, i was already wet before you got that camera spray shot, dawg, oh but that poor camera guy lol

AND WEI’RE GOONA LETIT BÜRN BÜRN BÜRN BÜRN, everybody its a singalong

hi, yeah...fuck off, jim

NO YOU DUMB ASSHOLES YOU KNOCKED OVER STELLA MY COFFEE MAMA

charles, you greedy bastard i dont know if should be ashamed when i say that i would still let him top me quite violently even still

Wow this rave got out of hand really fast, i blame marilyn manson

another day, another professor X 😪🔫💀☠️🔥🔪 𝚛𝚒𝚙, 𝕗𝕝𝕪 𝕙𝕚𝕘𝕙, 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔴𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔟𝔢 𝔪𝔦𝔰𝔰𝔢𝔡

i swear to go if anything happens to either my coffee mama or baby miss daddy i will reign hellfire.

Oh so it takes a gunshot for Charles to do a 360 running man but not a jay gatsby meets canadian, hockey riot, emo rave. Gotcha. Hes a man with a code.

That’s what you get for hoeing after your cousin, constance. This is all your fault!

Ending

Timeskip: Ooohhh, yesturrrrdayyyy all my troubles seems so far away--

hunny that ain’t the moon, thats your super secret boho alter

Noooo the kitchennnn, that was my favourite room, other than the bathroom for obvious reasons, I hope the milk cartons are okay...👀

I guess meerkat isn't getting her num-nums, and charles is just going to have to live with charred fruit if he decides to come back

FRANKIE JONAS! THANK GOD!

Oohhere'ss the tea, it's about damn time! I called it! I knew ms variant mongoose was the one who did the fucky things! But i was shocked to find out that Mary was the favourite child over connie, hmm very much bad parenting

ooooh, knock knock, is it charlie-boy? oh, thats disappointing, its just that gossip chick and her husband, boooooo

Never again...never. We get it baby daddy.

oh? another knock? HAHAHAHAHA ITS THE FIRE GUY LMAOOO, what a king. He reminds me of stan lee!

What aare these people doing, they aren't goddess you give offerings to so that your crops will be plentiful, fuck off man. ANOTHER KNOCK..

and i opp-- herreeeees charlie!

‘friends’ sir you were halfway in her pantaloons, stop trying to act all innocent, the fuck. Wow hes really going for it huh?

did he just rip the chain off? Oh charles relax, its door, you don't need to moan like that.

Uhm, i love connie, so fuck you charles you twisted, manipulative burnt cornstalk of a human being. Oh yeah throw a hissy fit, that's real attractive, keep going, she’ll totally say yes.

Oh wait NO DON'T DO THAT, NO THAT'S A DOOR. And another door? NO GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BABY DADDY ALEXANDRA, SHES MINE.

YOU LITTLE BITCH BOY, GET OFF! WTF!

*standing ovation* give it up for meer-to-the-kat, bravo kid! OH NO HES DEAd, YOU CAN STOP NOW

hahahaha guess whos deep in the garden now, Charles.

Ooh and we are back to start, nice. Children, she's a seasoned murder, might wanna chill on the whole bit you got going on.

Good, smile andddd scene!

Final Thoughts

Okie Dokie, I actually liked this movie a lot.

The acting was absolutely phenomenal, especially on Alexandra’s Daddario and Taissa Farmiga’s part, the characters were so well played. They focused in on so different points of view in this story that it captured the chaos that they were living individually and as a group under one roof. It constantly kept you on edge with the strange nuances in their dialogue, unnerving pauses and the progression of the condition of each character.

It was great. The aesthetic was there, the small but necessary breaks with dark humour really kept the story flowing and most of all, the fervour. It was everywhere, in their emotions or outbursts like Charles at the dinner table and on the stairs, or the way the townspeople kept adding fuel to their own personal hell. And I must admit, it's hard to make characters like Jim the firefighter relevant, but every person that this story involves has a distinct purpose and significance to the plot.

The only negative thing I could think of was I just wish there was more, I wanted it to be longer so that the small gaps in the movie could have been powerful. Okay, what else. Yes, Charles Blackwood, despite all of...that, will make a great character for me to touch on and has a lot of interesting qualities that I will be sure to tap into. Oh! And the only reason why no one else is getting the stan award was that my coffee mama was the only character who wasn't off the rails or just a terrible waste of human life! We stan!

Hoped you enjoyed this and my questionable thought process, I’m gonna go now...bye lol

Overall Score: 8.5/10

🏆 Honorary Stan Award: Stella Ella Ola, Clap Clap Clap. Periodt.

#we have always lived in the castle #castle daddy #sac reviews

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ace-beef · 4 years

Text

AH the Musical bits I love

- the way Michael looks like he’s focusing so hard on keeping to his rhythm in the sync at the beginning

- “Geeeoooff! Tell us, whAt are we dOIN’ BOI? LET ME HEAR IT BABEEYY!”

- Michael’s soft “what are we doooing” whisper

- Geoff’s face through the entirety of that part and the song, he looks 10000% done with them all skhfjdds

- “what’s the last game Lindsay won?” “HEY!”

- “everybody shUT THE FUCK! UP!” [pause] “we’re playing GTA!”

- the sprunk clusterfuck at the beginning of the first race

- Gavin jumping onto the part of the track where the others were for the sole purpose to fuck with them

- the moment Ryan said “I’m somewhat in the air” I knew exactly was about to happen

- Fiona’s dress during the Still in the Air song!!! It’s so pretty!!!

- the fact that the lyrics of Still in the Air screamed of a villain song yet the fairly calm and cheerful music of it was the complete opposite of a villain song... like it’s in a major key and is all light and boppy

- “I’m falling down now, that Newton’s a dick, and soon I’ll be dealing with all of you pricks”

- how ‘still in the air’ is a joke that is still being made despite the fact it’s origins were back in 2014, normally AH jokes die after like a year at most but somehow the ‘still in the air’ joke hasn’t died and ended up getting a song centered around it

- Fiona and Lindsay at the end ESPECIALLY Fiona dabbing before calmly walking off

- “he’s back there exerting all over my back end”

- “sorry Jeremy” “whahappened” [Michael sprunks Jeremy] “AAAAAA” [Michael cackles manically]

- Jeremy during the entirety of Get Sprunked where he’s just going ape shit in the back

- Michael’s outfit in Get Sprunked

- “look at you, passing me, as determined as can be, with your foot on the gas, you know what? KISS MY ASS”

- Michael and Jeremy collapsing to the floor dead at the end of Get Sprunked

- the soft guitar in the Team OG song

- the fact that neither Geoff or Jack can hold a tune that well but goddamnit the song made me soft anyway

- “where would I be without Geoffrey”

- “know that to me you’re worth 100 Gavin Frees”

- “Jack, I wish I could fire you” “I-I think the line is actually ‘I wish I could quit you’” “w-what’d I say?”

- THE HUG AT THE END OF THE TEAM OG SONG WOW I LOVE MY INTERNET DADS :’)

- the shortest round of Offence Defense we have ever seen

- the moment Jack mentions that his team is up against the Dusk Boys the three of them instantly start fuckin’ around “duuuusskkk”

- “the O2 has... depleteeedd”

- Jack with the backwards camera to see two black cars go spinning as Gavin screams

- THE DUSK BOYS OUTFITS IN HARD TO BREATHE LIKE DAMN THEY’RE LOOKIN’ GOOD

- just everything that Gavin does throughout the entire Hard to Breathe song is hilariously funny

- I am SURE Alfredo has eyeliner on and I’m HERE FOR IT

- the fact that the song sounds like a love song but is actually 100% just about oxygen is fucking hilarious

- Gavin pretending to choke and the others just breaking out of their boyband characters to panic and make an attempt to help him

-“according to Wikipedia the transfer of oxygen into blood is called diffusion” “oohh y e a h”

- Gavin dropping his sunglasses on the camera before fumbling to put them back on his face

- “don’t know how you work but Google makes it sound true”

- “in 8th grade my science project was about you” (wtf is 8th grade in British language?? Like,, year 7? Year 9?? Idk)

- Gavin’s wide stance and hip thrust at the end of Hard to Breathe

- the Dusk Boys high five with them all genuinely laughing and smiling at the end of Hard to Breathe IT MAKES ME FEEL SOFT AND FUZZY

- “we can thrink-” [realises mistake] “I’M THRINKIN’”

- “Alfredo do not take deep breaths! Take tiny sharp breaths!”

- “this works out perfectly because Jeremy was dropped right at the end!”

- the fact that you can tell that Gavin it trying so hard not to laugh during the entire Gavin is a Prick segment

- Sarah sticking her middle fingers up at Gavin with a face of absolute shit-eating glee

- that shot of Matt’s face on the right with a faded out Matt on the left which looks like that Monsters Inc meme

- “be strong for mummy”

- Gavin hitting the webcam with his Matt-ball “you fuckin’ nailed the webcam!”

- “Lindsay what are you in?” “I’m in baby”

- Lindsay looks GREAT during Lindsay Wins by the way like I never thought I’d say this about Lindsay but after seeing that song she could punch me in the face and I’d be happy

- “man, children at the office plus kids at home?? SHIIIIT”

- that black and white shot of Lindsay with the crown

- “Michael shut the FUCK up and make me a sandwich!”

- at the end “thanks guys bye!” YOU HAVE NO RIGHT BEING THAT CUTE LINDSAY

- “Quick! Lindsay! Hit Jeremy! Kill that man!”

- GOD literally everything about the FAHC song like literally this song slaps and I listen to it on repeat as well as watching it over and over again

- SO. MANY. SLO MO. SHOTS. THEY’RE ALL BEAUTIFUL

- that Mag King laugh after the opening chorus which I didn’t notice at first is just,,,,, ILLEGAL.... but like in a good way

- that shot of them all walking in a line like they all look so good wtf

- THE IN CHARACTER BIT IN THE HEIST ROOM especially the fact that the Vagabond sits there motionless throughout the entire bit

- the lil slo mo suit up shots like somehow they’re all so aesthetically pleasing to watch especially Jack putting on the shirt, Gavin’s face instantly becoming emotionless after he’s got the glasses on and RYAN FUCKING HAYWOOD WITH THE MASK WHILE STARING DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA

- the shot of Ryan and Jack walking along the pavement is really satisfying and idk why

- “if heaven’s really there we’re only getting in there by stealing the key” THIS!! This line right here is just PEAK FAHC like the vibes from that line my god

- GAVIN TRYING TO CATCH THE PIGEONS WHY IS THIS SO CUTE??? And it somehow fits in perfectly even though it technically does not fit with the ‘badass vibe’ at all

- that FLAWLESS briefcase pass between the Battle Buddies

- Geoff’s, Gavin’s, and Michael’s faces in the slow mo running shot

- just,, Jack in the slow mo running shot,,,, this man is too good for this world

- Lindsay aggressively brandishing a knife like wow EDIT: I JUST NOTICED THAT SHE HAS A TINY GARBO IN HER OTHER HAND WTF I’M LAUGHING SO HARD

- Gavin spinning that briefcase

- Gavin getting mugged at the end which was simply the icing on the cake of the whole song

#I literally don't know what to do with myself it's so good #what have we done to deserve this #achievement hunter #rooster teeth #ah #rt #achievement hunter musical #achievement hunter the musical #ah musical #ah the musical #fake ah crew #fahc #beef speaks

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gilmores-glorious-blog · 3 years

Text

think of all the fun i´ve missed (think of all the fellas that i haven’t kissed)

merry (early) christmas @leifdonnellies! i was your secret santa and i had a lot of fun writing this fic for you :D i hope you enjoy it and have a great holiday season! (the title is from santa baby and really doesn’t fit with the fic all that well but i thought it was funny...)

Tobin Batra knew every word in the English dictionary, and yet he still didn’t know the right words to describe the chaos that was SPRQ Point holiday parties.

After going to one for this first time, Tobin immediately knew why STEM kids and queer kids were never the people throwing parties in high school. When you combined those groups into the group that was the fourth floor of SPRQ Point, the result was a drunken mess of a gathering.

The floor was cleared off as it would be for any business-related gala, but instead of tasteful lighting and tech speeches, there were tacky Christmas lights strung up and shitty music blasting from every speaker.

And yet, Tobin loved them. He loved his oddball group of friends and colleagues, and it was fun to hang out with them without any pressure of deadlines and CEO visits, and instead just a week-long break to look forward to. At recent parties, Zoey’s DJ friend Mo provided the music, and he did have objectively better music taste than anyone else there. Tobin liked Mo, and liked getting to chat with him at parties, mostly about music and queer stuff. Another plus of parties was seeing who gave the most outrageous white elephant gifts- Tobin was currently winning that competition ever since he gifted Max a live chinchilla a year ago. (Max still had the chinchilla. He named it Joan after their former boss, and it was beloved by everyone.) Yet another great thing about it was that it was the one night that they finally could replace the bread bar or oatmeal bar or whatever bar with an open bar, because apparently it was legal if it was for a party. But Tobin’s favorite thing about the holiday parties was the fact that it was the one night a year that his boyfriend let Tobin kiss him in front of their colleagues.

Leif was surprisingly shy about PDA, and had been as long as Tobin had known him. His parents weren’t exactly the most touchy-feely people, with each other or with their children, and it had clearly rubbed off on Leif. Tobin was fine with this, of course, he’d never want to make his boyfriend uncomfortable. Plus the two lived together, and Leif was incredibly touch starved at home, so it wasn’t really a big deal that they never did more than very occasionally hold hands at work. That being said, Tobin discovered recently that Leif found it “morally wrong”- Leif’s words, not Tobin’s- to disobey the laws of mistletoe, and he planned to fully exploit that fact at the party.

Mistletoe was a big thing at these parties- because obviously it was, what chaotic Christmas party was complete without a tiny, slightly-poisonous plant that required you to kiss whoever’s nearest to you if you found yourself under it? When they arrived at the party, Tobin snatched a cluster of mistletoe that was hanging right outside the elevators. He figured that was a fair place to steal it from, because as much as he loved the tradition, it was a bit of a cruel place to hang it, catching people off guard like that. Leif glanced over and saw him grab it, but just rolled his eyes as Tobin winked at him and smirked.

“Hey guys!” Zoey greeted as they joined the group. “You can put your gifts over there…” She pointed to a small pile before glancing at the package in Tobin’s arms with concern. “I do not want to know what’s in there this year.”

Tobin smiled wide. “Well, I tried hard to top Joan the chinchilla, but I think it was my peak.”

Leif and Zoey rolled their eyes in unison as Leif gave Tobin a shove towards the stack of gifts.

Tobin soon joined the rest of the party, dragging Leif with him and forcing him to dance to the loud music with him. As per usual, Mo had created a killer playlist, albeit a bit of a weird conglomeration of songs. Any playlist that went from a stunning, slow cover of Someday At Christmas (that seemed to have been sung by the DJ himself) immediately into the original version of Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer had to be made by someone at least a little bit high.

About an hour into the party, Tobin could tell that Leif was getting overwhelmed by all the people and the sounds, so he silently took his hand and pulled him into the nest.

“Thanks,” Leif said once they were out of earshot of others. He rubbed his neck awkwardly as he sat down on the conference table. “Sorry, I don’t know what was happening back there, I’ve been better with social stuff for a while, I guess it just… I dunno… it’s still hard sometimes.”

“Bro, it’s okay, I get it. You never need to apologize about anxiety stuff. And it’s not going to be all better, all the time, and that’s okay. You’ve been doing so good lately, Leif, and you deserve to celebrate that.” Tobin sat next to Leif and put his hand over Leif’s.

Leif turned to him and smiled softly. “Thank you, babe.”

Tobin lay his head on Leif’s shoulder and began rubbing gentle circles on Leif’s hand with his thumb. “You’re welcome.”

Neither man spoke for a few minutes, and Tobin could hear Leif doing some deep breathing, something he often did as a way to calm his anxiety.

Eventually, when Leif seemed to have fully relaxed, he turned towards Tobin and smiled at him again. “Have I mentioned that you look really nice tonight?”

Tobin laughed. “A few times. But you can tell me again.”

“Well you do. Really nice.”

Leif leaned forward and kissed Tobin, and Tobin counted it a win that his boyfriend kissed him at work with no mistletoe involved.

Tobin pulled away much sooner than he wanted to, because they were still at a party after all. “Hey, you ready to go back?”

Leif squeezed his hand before standing up. “Yeah. I think so.”

The two of them left the conference room, and only got a few strange looks from the other party-goers as they made their way back to the group.

“There you are!” Zoey said as she and Simon made their way over. “We were waiting for you to start gifts.”

The next half-hour was spent in a flurry of white elephant chaos, filled with plenty of cursing and sighing and coming close to tears begging someone to please steal their gift because they don’t even play an instrument, why do they need sheet music for the wii theme?! Although none of the gifts came close to the glory of Tobin’s chinchilla, it was unanimously decided that Leif won this year’s most outrageous gift with the collection of small cowboy hats that Simon ended up with (something Simon was weirdly pleased with receiving.) Tobin had pouted about this decision, seeing as the hats had originally been his idea, but his boyfriend looked so pleased about winning such a stupid contest that Tobin let him take the win without too much complaining.

It was getting late, and the party would likely be wearing to a close soon. People were still dancing, however- Leif being one of them. He and Zoey and Simon were in the middle of the floor, moving in a way that they must have considered “dancing” (but was really just a weird movement of limbs all over the place).

The red and green lights were reflecting in Leif’s hair, making the blond curls glow in a way that could only be described as magical. His suit jacket had been abandoned at some point in the evening, so he was wearing only a deep red short sleeve dress shirt with a green vest over it. Despite the cliche color scheme, the outfit looked great on Leif. Tobin watched as Leif threw his head back in laughter at something Simon said, and felt a weird flutter in his heart at the sight. Even after nearly two years of dating Leif, and nearly twelve years of being in love with him, the other man never failed to make Tobin feel like he was fifteen again, looking over at the boy playing video games on the couch next to him, and being hit with a rush of feelings so sudden and so strong that Tobin thought he was dying.

Tobin moved suddenly from where he’d been standing next to George, asking his friend to hold his drink for a moment. He joined Leif on the dance floor right as Santa Baby faded out (the dance moves done for that song did not bear repeating, to say the least), and faintly processed Mo announcing that their final song of the night was White Christmas because it had just started snowing in San Francisco, so of course it was.

“Hey.” Tobin announced his presence as he sidled up next to Leif, swaying slightly to the melody.

“Hi!” Leif turned around so quickly that he needed to steady himself by grabbing on to Tobin’s waist (nothing Tobin was complaining about), his face flushed from dancing.

“Care to dance?” Tobin put his arms up and around Leif’s shoulders, noticing out of the corner of his eye that Zoey and Simon had begun to slow dance away from them, seemingly lost in each other.

Leif just smiled in response and began leading Tobin slowly around the floor. Neither one of them were particularly great at dancing, but it didn’t matter. As Tobin heard the song drawing to a close, he fumbled in his jacket pocket for the mistletoe he had grabbed earlier. Upon finding it, he raised his arm above both him and Leif’s heads so that the mistletoe hung above them.

“Hey L.” Tobin said to get his boyfriend’s attention, because he’d somehow not noticed the commotion.

“Yeah?”

“Look up.” Tobin smirked.

Leif did so and immediately rolled his eyes and blushed.

“Well?” Tobin knew he was being obnoxious but didn’t care. “I seem to recall someone here saying that it was wrong to not follow the rules of mistletoe. Are you really gonna go back on your word now-”

Leif shut Tobin up by kissing him.

Tobin smiled into the kiss, moving his non-mistletoe hand to cradle Leif’s face. People were probably staring at them, but he didn’t care. It’s not like no one knew they were together.

Leif pulled back after a minute, slapping the mistletoe with indignance until Tobin lowered his arm. Their faces were still close, foreheads resting together.

“Merry Christmas Tobes.”

Tobin gave Leif another quick kiss and smiled at him. “Merry Christmas Leif.”

#also i'm pretty sure every fic i've seen so far as had a theme of mistletoe and mine is no different so uh.. i hope you enjoy that trope #zepsanta2020 #zep #zoey's extraordinary playlist #zep secret santa #zep fic #zep fanfiction #zoey's extraordinary playlist fic #coder boyfriends #coder bfs #coder boyfriends fic #leif donnelly #tobin batra #leif x tobin #leif donnelly x tobin batra #eli.writes

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starryknight09 · 3 years

Text

Bad moods and heart to hearts

Febuwhump Day 14: “I didn’t mean it”

Read on AO3.

________________________________________________________

Peter walked through the elevator doors into the penthouse, carrying his bad mood with him like a storm cloud. It’d been a particularly horrible day.

Flash had been relentless with his teasing and harassment. Usually Peter didn’t let it get to him, but both MJ and Ned had been out sick, so he’d felt more alone and exposed than usual. And that might have been why Flash had decided to go for the jugular, picking and picking about his new family. How he was just Tony’s charity case, and they’d only taken him in because they felt bad for him, and they weren’t really his family and never would be. By far, the worst taunt had been that Tony probably regreted his decision to adopt him, but he couldn’t change his mind now because of how that would look in the press, so he was stuck with Peter. That one had hurt. Probably because similar doubts had plagued Peter ever since Tony had adopted him after the snap, when they’d found out May hadn’t survived the intervening five years.

Logically, he knew he shouldn’t have doubts. Not after Tony had moved his entire family back to the city just so Peter could keep going to Midtown with his friends. Tony wouldn’t have done that if he didn’t care about him. But it didn’t matter. Peter couldn’t just rationalize away his doubts. At least once a day he wondered if Tony regretted taking him in, which was better than the once an hour when he’d first started living with him a few months ago, but it still wasn’t great.

“Petey! You’re home!” Morgan bounded toward him and wrapped herself around his legs.

“Hey Mo.” He said quietly, her display of unbridled affection not melting his foul mood away like it usually would.

“Hi Peter.” Pepper smiled at him from the kitchen as she poured hot water into a thermos to make her usual tea.

“Hey Pepper.” He greeted back, trying to smile but not quite managing it. Luckily, she seemed too distracted to notice.

“Peter do you mind watching Morgan for a few minutes while I make a quick call?” Pepper asked.

“Sure.” He shrugged.

“Thank you. You’re a lifesaver.”

“It’s no problem.”

Pepper smiled at him again before taking her tea and walking toward her home office for a little privacy.

“Yay! Let’s play!” Morgan let go of him and jumped up and down in excitement before tearing away back toward the living room where she had an assortment of toys strewn all over the floor.

Peter let his backpack drop to the ground by the door. He knew Tony hated it when he did that because the man had tripped over it more than once, but Peter didn’t feel like walking it all the way to his room just to appease his guardian. May had never cared where he left his backpack. And yeah, Peter knew it was rude to disregard Tony’s rules, especially since there were so few of them, but he couldn’t bring himself to care today.

“Peter hurry up!” Morgan commanded impatiently.

“I’m coming.” He mumbled and walked over.

“What are we building?” He asked, trying to gather some enthusiasm as he took a seat on the floor across from Morgan and her Legos. He didn’t want to make Morgan a victim of his bad mood.

“Elsa’s castle.” Morgan answered and pushed the directions his way, pointing at the step she was on. “We’re doing this part.”

“Ok.” He started searching the floor for the right pieces.

“Oh! I almost forgot!” Morgan said, sitting up straighter with a wide smile. “Guess what.”

“What?”

“It’s sibling day at school next Friday. Can you come?” She asked, so eager she was practically bouncing where she sat.

“Um, what?” The words didn’t compute.

“Sibling day.” Morgan explained slower as if that would help him understand. “Next Friday. Can you come?”

“Why would I come?” He asked, still not understanding.

Morgan tilted her head and frowned at him. “Because you’re my brother. Duh.”

Peter blinked. Of course he’d noticed that’s what Morgan called him and Tony and Pepper referred to him that way too when they were talking to about him, but he didn’t think they really meant it. Like he wasn’t actuallyher brother. Not real enough to show up at her school and play that role anyway.

“No I’m not.” He denied without thinking.

Morgan looked like he’d slapped her. She stared at him for a long few seconds before her frown deepened and her lips pursed angrily. “Yes you are.”

“No, I’m not.” He repeated, not sure why he was bothering to argue with a six year old.

“Yes. You are.” Morgan countered, growing even more adamant, along with louder. Tony always joked that she had Pepper’s temper, which meant it took a lot to anger her, but once you succeeded, she exploded like a firework. Peter had to take his word for it. He’d still never actually seen Pepper angry.

“I’m not.” He said, quieter, trying to deescalate the argument even as he refused to concede.

“Yes you are!” Morgan yelled throwing a handful of Legos at him. “Why are you lying?”

“I’m not.”

“You are!” She stood and stamped her foot, crossing her arms in front of her chest, the very image of upset child.

“Hey, what’s going on in here?” Pepper asked, appearing out of nowhere. In the short amount of time he’d been living with them, Peter had realized Pepper had some kind of super Mom sense for trouble, sort of like his spidey sense for danger.

“Um, nothing.” Peter said quickly, cheeks flaming at the thought of Morgan explaining their argument to her Mom.

“Nuh uh.” Morgan complained. “Peter’s lying.” She pointed a finger down at him.

“And what’s Peter lying about?” Pepper asked, one eyebrow arching up.

“Nothing.” He repeated, knowing his embarrassment was shining through. “It’s nothing. Morgan, you’re right. I’m sorry.” He caught Morgan’s eyes, silently pleading for her to let it go. If they had to have a discussion about his exact role and his appropriate title in this family, he might die of mortification.

Morgan studied him for a few seconds, but she must’ve seen his fear, or the apology had been sufficient, because she gave him a nod and sat back down.

“Ok.” She said and went back to searching for Legos, her previous anger completely forgotten. God, he didn’t deserve her. If she actually was his sister, she’d make a really good one. He obviously wouldn’t be a very good big brother.

Why had he turned that into such a big thing? He should’ve just let her have her way. The only reason he could come up with was that Flash had worn him down all day today over that exact topic until it felt like an exposed nerve and then Morgan had plucked it.

Pepper wandered back to the kitchen, obviously not interested in digging into it now that there didn’t seem to be a problem. Peter let out an internal sigh of relief. And although playing Legos with Morgan was the last thing he felt like doing, he made himself sit there and do just that. He owed her that at least. After another thirty minutes she was back to her normal energetic self and they’d made it almost halfway through the castle. Peter always went slow on purpose so Morgan ended up doing most of it herself. She was certainly smart enough. At six she was already doing the 12+ Lego boxes.

“Wow this is looking really good.” He told her as he plastered on a smile. “But I have to go do some homework. Can we finish it later?”

“I guess.” Morgan nodded, putting the pieces in her hand down and reaching for a nearby plastic tub filled with crayons and coloring books. “I can do something else until you come back.”

“Thanks.” He leaned forward to kiss the top of her head before standing. He didn’t feel like doing homework, and he didn’t really have to since it was a Friday, but Morgan didn’t know that. Mainly he just needed some alone time to decompress and try to get out of this funk.

“Knock knock.” He heard Tony say though the music blasting from his earbuds. Before he could tell him to come in, the man cracked open the door and peeked his head in. “You decent?”

“Well even if I wasn’t you’re already in here, so…” He griped from where he lay on top of his covers in bed. His bad mood from earlier still hadn’t completely dissipated, although listening to music had helped some.

“No I’m not. I’m still standing outside.” Tony joked, pushing the door all the way open and gesturing toward his body, which still remained outside the door’s threshold. “So, can I come in?”

Peter rolled his eyes. “Of course.” He pulled the earbuds out of his ears and sat up. “When did you get back?”

“About an hour ago.” Tony answered, coming in and closing the door behind him. That was odd. Usually they only had the heart to hearts behind closed doors. “You’d know that if you weren’t trying to blast away your super hearing.”

Peter didn’t say anything to that, already picking up on Tony’s body language. The man was fidgeting with the cuffs of his shirt sleeves, something he only did when he was anxious, which usually only happened lately when they had to have a ‘serious talk’. Great. The evidence wasn’t stacking up in his favor.

“What’s going on?” He asked with suspicion. Whatever it was, he’d rather just get it over with.

“How’s the homework going?” Tony asked, ignoring his question as he walked over to sit on the edge of his bed.

“What?”

“The homework. That’s what you told Morgan you were doing in here, right?”

“Oh. Yeah…” He’d forgotten that’d been his excuse.

“Funny, it must be kind of hard to do since you left your backpack in front of the door again. I almost broke my neck tripping on it earlier.”

Peter swallowed his smile. So that’s what this was about. He was going to get a talking to about breaking the stupid backpack rule. This should be interesting. Tony wasn’t the best at playing the stern parent role.

“Sorry.” He mumbled, the vision of Tony tripping over his heavy backpack making it harder to keep his face straight.

“Yeah yeah go ahead. You can laugh. I know you want to.”

Peter snorted.

“But seriously, you need to stop leaving your backpack there kid or one of these days I actually am going to break my neck.”

He tried to look appropriately chastised, but his smile probably made it less than convincing.

“I’ll try to remember.” He said with a nod, thinking the conversation was over, but Tony didn’t move to get up. Instead, the man continued to stare at him as he thrummed his fingers against the mattress. It was slightly unnerving. “Was there…something else?”

Tony sighed and rubbed a hand over his beard before speaking, “Just one more thing. Morgan said the two of had an argument earlier.”

Peter hadn’t been expecting that. His eyes widened for a second before he remembered to school his expression, but he wasn’t sure how well he succeeded. His heart pounded in his chest, and he was glad Tony didn’t have the super hearing to notice it. He didn’t want to talk about this. He couldn’t talk about this. Especially with Tony. As soon as he realized Tony was studying his reaction, he looked down as if he suddenly found the earbuds in his hands interesting.

“It was nothing. It’s fine.” He mumbled and internally begged for the man to just drop it. To let it go so he wouldn’t have to live with the embarrassment of talking about it.

“Didn’t sound like nothing to me.” Tony argued but his voice remained gentle without a hint of reprimand. “You told her you weren’t her brother.”

He clenched his jaw. Oh god, they were going to talk about it.

“Look I’m sorry ok. I didn’t mean it.” He said, flicking his earbuds around, not able to meet Tony’s eyes.

“You didn’t mean it, or you didn’t mean to hurt her feelings?” Tony asked in clarification and of course he’d hit the nail right on the head.

Peter shrugged instead of answering but the heat of Tony’s stare made him shift uncomfortably.

“See, I think you did mean it.” Tony said once it became obvious Peter had no intention of answering. “I don’t think you wanted to hurt Morgan’s feelings, but I think you really don’t consider yourself her brother.”

He garnered enough courage to finally meet Tony’s eyes and answer with another shrug, “I’m not.”

Tony’s face fell and he shook his head sadly. “That’s where you’re wrong kid. I think we got our wires crossed somewhere.”

Peter frowned.

“Have you really not heard me and Pepper calling you Morgan’s brother for the last few months?”

“Well, yeah, but that doesn’t make it true.” He mumbled, going back to playing with the earbuds in his hands.

It was Tony’s turn to frown. “Really? And why is that? Walk me through your thought process.”

“Pepper’s not my mom and you’re not—” He came up short, the words refusing to come out because of how untrue they felt.

“I’m not what?” Tony prompted looking like he was steeling himself for a blow.

“You’re not my…biological dad.” Adding the biological part was the only way he could make himself say it. It was true after all. He wasn’t lying.

Tony sighed. “You’re right. Biologically you’re not my son.”

And ouch. That hurt more than he thought it would.

“But,” Tony continued on, “that doesn’t mean I’m not your dad.”

Peter’s eyes shot up to meet Tony’s in surprise. Neither of them had ever used that word to describe what Tony was to him, even though technically the man had adopted him. It’d still taken Peter over a month to cave to his request to call him Tony. And even though secretly, in the deepest recesses of his brain, sometimes he thought of the man that way, Peter had never called him…that. The thought of calling him that to his face made his cheeks burn.

Tony reached out to pat his leg. “I think part of this is my fault. We’ve never really talked about this. Pepper spearheaded the whole adoption process because I was otherwise laid up.” That was the understatement of the century. Tony had come as close as anyone could to dying after snapping the gauntlet.

“And then the whole recovery process was a little distracting.” Another gross understatement.

“And then once I was finally back to myself, enough time had passed that I didn’t think we needed to have this talk. But obviously we do.”

“And what talk is that?” He asked with feigned bravery.

“The talk where I tell you I didn’t just adopt you on a whim. Or because you didn’t have anyone. Look, I know that before the snap, I wasn’t exactly great at talking about feelings, but I think I’ve gotten better over the past five years, so I want you to know that even before Thanos, I was already starting to see you as a sort of son figure, even though I knew you didn’t need a dad. But losing you…” Tony took a deep calming breath before continuing, “It took losing you for me to realize how much I loved you.”

Peter felt tears prickle in his eyes.

“I love you kid.” Tony repeated. “Pepper might’ve made the decision to adopt you without my go ahead, but she knew she didn’t need it because she knew I loved you. And that’s why I adopted you. The only reason. Not because I felt sorry for you, or I felt like I had to, or because I was trying to do it for good PR. God knows where that last one came from, since why would I need a bump in my PR after saving the universe?”

Peter let out a wet laugh. All the rumors and the articles in the media saying as much had bothered him, but he’d never admitted it to Tony. Obviously they’d bothered the other man too.

“I adopted you because I wanted to. Because I love you. No other reason. Got it?”

Peter surreptitiously wiped his eyes and nodded, not trusting his voice.

But Tony wasn’t done yet. “Adopted. Biological. It doesn’t matter. I love you and Morgan the same. You’re both my kids. So that makes you Morgan’s brother. Agreed?”

“Ok. Agreed.” He said, voice cracking over the words.

“Good.” Tony nodded as if that settled everything. “Now give me a hug.”

He let out another watery laugh, but did as Tony said, and leaned forward to hug him, soaking in the familiar aroma of motor oil mixed with aftershave. He closed his eyes and let himself be comforted.

“I love you too.” Peter whispered a moment later when he realized he hadn’t said it back yet. He had, in fact, never said it, so he was surprised how easy the words slipped out. Probably because they were true.

“I know.” Tony said back. “Even when you don’t talk, I still hear you. That’s a dad’s job.”

Peter hugged him tighter as all the stresses and concerns he’d been holding onto finally evaporated away.

#febuwhump2021 #febuwhump #irondad

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satan-chillin · 3 years

Text

Hereafter (4/7)

Wei Wuxian is sent off of Cloud Recesses, bade by his fathers to “have fun and make friends” which, now that he thinks about it, sounds like a gross oversimplification of what the next six months away from home will entail.

If he happens to form unlikely connections, start a matchmaking, and gets unwittingly involved in the presently strained political state of the cultivation world, those are just par for the course.

Chasing after one of the famed Twin Jades of Lan, however, is an added bonus.

(Or, WWX was sent to Gusu by his fathers Wen Kexing & Zhou Zishu)

Part 2 of Spirited Away Series. Part 1 here.

Also available in Ao3. Hereafter Chapter 1, 2, 3

❆❆❆

Wei Wuxian stumbled, sputtered, and shivered—exactly in that order.

“Lan Zhan, are you alright?!”

The question was apparently unnecessary seeing as Lan Zhan was already standing, unfazed as if they hadn’t been dragged into some—Wei Wuxian’s eyes darted wildly everywhere to take a stock of the white rocky walls—cave underneath a cold spring.

He hauled himself steadily on his feet amidst his heavily drenched clothes weighing him down to the fortunately shallow (but fucking cold brrrr) water. Resolutely, he cleared his throat to hide a cough and another shiver, straightening his appearance as much as he could, sweeping back his wet hair on his now thankfully numb back.

“We’re in a cave,” said Wei Wuxian uselessly. “Ah, do you happen to know the exit?”

Lan Zhan’s mouth remained that firm line before trudging ahead in dismissal. Wei Wuxian followed after him and found that continuous movement helped fend off the chill. After composing himself in silence, he managed to abate the chattering of his teeth and regulated a bit of his internal body heat, a trick he learned young and grew up using in particularly frigid winter nights.

Wei Wuxian paused. Frowning, he reached for his sleeves and found the item he was searching for missing. He had been holding that pouch before falling, hadn’t he?

Oh no.

“Crap.” His voice was loud enough to ring within the cave, halting even Lan Zhan though not exactly turning to look back at his companion to ask. “Wait. Let me go back a bit—the pouch—your ribbon!”

The statement warranted Lan Zhan’s attention this time. Wei Wuxian felt rather sheepish under the stare. Stupid. He was supposed to return it as an apology and then they would go on their merry way and forget Wei Wuxian’s moment of weakness (and stupidity). Resigned and chastised the longer the pointed stare lengthen, he said, “Look, I’m really sorry about what happened. I don’t know if you believe me, but I honestly didn’t know no one’s allowed to touch it.”

Lan Zhan did not blink, and it would have been eerie if he wasn’t doing a great job imitating a magnificent statue carved in jade. The shade of color that stood out the most from him was the gold of his eyes amidst the reflection of what little light there was within the cave walls, like a relic hidden and untouched by time.

Wei Wuxian swallowed down the poetics threatening to spill from his tongue. Not the time.

Wordlessly, Lan Zhan unclenched a closed fist to reveal the familiar pouch and pulled out the ribbon within, blessedly dry, and without breaking eye contact tied it around his forehead before turning his back once more and proceeding ahead.

Wei Wuxian could only blink after him.

… Was that a smile?

His mind must be playing tricks on him, or it could be the cold, come to think of it. It wasn’t hard for him to come to the conclusion that he was indeed still dazed, probably from the rough tumble earlier into this cave and the low temperature, or both, when the next thing he was seeing was rabbits.

Fluffy white bunnies with tiny Lan forehead ribbons. Wei Wuxian wanted to laugh at the absurdity this day was turning.

To be fair, though, those were really cute bunnies with beady eyes that noticed their visitors and sniffed at the ground. Wei Wuxian resisted the urge to gather a bunch of them to cuddle for warmth.

“Lan Zhan,” he called, barely taking his eyes off the little animals that littered the narrow outcropping to the side. “Are you seeing what I’m—”

Wei Wuxian collided with what felt like an invisible force that slammed him back to the water. Indignantly, he rose, hacking out water. “Oh, come on!”

While Lan Zhan didn’t appear to be worried, he was equally confused between the white guqin that was simply sitting there, unassuming, and Wei Wuxian waddling through the water.

He had seen it the second time, a strike that came from a single, resounding note that went from behind Lan Zhan and straight to Wei Wuxian as if it knew he was an offender—and damn if he didn’t terribly regret not having Suibian or at least his fan to counter that. His reflex kicked in, diving narrowly to the shallow surface and twisting.

The next one followed immediately as he was about to pivot his heel and maneuver toward the dry ground. This one, however, did not reach him in time, Lan Zhan’s blade effectively blocking the assault.

Wei Wuxian figured that it was a protective measure of some sort, and whatever this cave was, it was clearly guarding something. Interestingly, it didn’t care enough to throw Lan Zhan out despite the fact that the two of them were technically intruders, recognizing that he wasn’t an outsider like Wei Wuxian was.

Sharply, he glanced back at the harmless rabbits that were seemingly imitating Lan disciples with their snowy fur and little forehead ribbons that, now that Wei Wuxian realized, could only be seen among the inner disciples of the Lan Sect. He was yet to get an explanation why that silk ribbon was too much of a big deal to be considered sacred, although...

Hold on.

“Lan Zhan! You’ll probably hate me for this, and I swear I’m sorry in advance, but unless you want me to die, you’re going to have to let me touch that ribbon again!”

For a split second, Wei Wuxian had an ugly feeling that Lan Zhan actually wanted to be rid of him permanently, and, oh, his cold-hearted muse, a beguiling, unsmiling—

Lan Zhan was on his side in the next beat, the silk ribbon coiled around his and Wei Wuxian’s forearm. The cloth was pulled taut between them, a mere couple of inches that Wei Wuxian was certain he could close with a strong tug.

He raised an eyebrow, lips pursing into a quirk at the edges. “Thank you.”

In lieu of ignoring Wei Wuxian’s eyes and slight grin, Lan Zhan stared at the guqin and led the way back to where he had been. Still a little mesmerized, Wei Wuxian was going to pretend that Lan Zhan’s pace wasn’t slow for his sake.

“I wonder what kind of treasure this is,” he said, humming appreciatively at the craftsmanship of the instrument in ivory and the delicate engraving of patterns, “that it’s not letting strangers near it.”

“Don’t touch it,” Lan Zhan warned needlessly as if Wei Wuxian would dare lay his wet hand on a fine creation. “This instrument is hard to obtain and has magical value. It knows how to target people with a different family name using Chord Assassination.”

Well, damn, that was the longest he’d heard from Lan Zhan. Also, Chord Assassination? Wasn’t that the one Lan Qiren mentioned in one of his lectures an ultimate move passed down from generation to generation in the Lan Sect?

“One of Lan Sect’s heirlooms then?” Though he wondered why hide this exquisite instrument when it could be displayed; why the magical protection for this thing alone? “Hm. Can we investigate?”

“Don’t touch it,” came the same warning. “You’ll be disrespecting my ancestor’s possession.”

“Fine. How are we supposed to investigate it without touching it?”

Lan Zhan moved around and to the other side of the guqin, sitting. Wei Wuxian decided to situate himself next to the instrument, watching raptly at the long fingers that tuned the strings, a pale hue of qi danced across the surface where he touched.

Wei Wuxian was aware that Lan Sect’s expertise lay in musical cultivation, and he had to admit that there was something enrapturing to observe a Lan performing it even if what Lan Zhan was doing was one of the basic aspects of it.

He did not recall closing his eyes, though when he next opened them, Lan Zhan was pointedly looking at the spot where Wei Wuxian sat. Consciously, he stood, patting nonexistent dirt away from the instrument.

Then the notes came, a response to Lan Zhan’s playing. A flash of what must be a surprise lit Lan Zhan’s features.

“It’s her.”

“Who?”

From the walls, there echoed a sudden noise of a hundred thundering steps, of multiple voices clamoring at once. They were both on high alert in an instant upon hearing the recitation of the names of the five major clans. Lan Zhan withdrew his sword, and Wei Wuxian, subconsciously, positioned himself a step in front of him.

There were loud chants of killing a holy mountain and destroying the Stygian metal, of demands for a Xue Chonghai to give up the said Stygian metal. The yells alone were enough to determine that the five major clans were to attack a clan of this Xue Chonghai.

“What is Stygian metal?”

“I’ve never heard of it,” Lan Zhan admitted.

The noise settled into a deafening silence before a clear and gentle feminine voice said: “Stygian metal is cursed. It’s best not to talk about it.”

At the place Lan Zhan previously occupied, a woman in blue of the shade of skies sat down, her face serene and timeless, not a hair out of place as she regarded them.

Lan Zhan went to his knees, bowing deeply, the gesture pulling Wei Wuxian down with him. “Gusu Lan Sect disciple, Lan Zhan, greets Elder Lan Yi.”

Wei Wuxian paid the same respects, almost floundering doing so. “Four Seasons Sect disciple, Wei Ying, greets Elder Lan Yi.”

At him, Lan Yi said, “You came a long way.”

Wei Wuxian was tempted to ask how in the world did she know and if that meant his fathers’ sect could be traced as far back as the ones in the cultivation world. He held his tongue, observing her quite taken with a rabbit that had wandered over to her. She stroked its fur fondly, and for a moment Wei Wuxian could believe that she wasn’t an elder of centuries old.

“Elder, do you raise those rabbits?” he asked.

“Yes. To keep me company,” she answered. “My magic has waned over the years,” she said evenly. “They love to play so they frequently run outside.”

“Elder, they said you passed away years ago,” said Lan Zhan. “Why...”

“Is it related to the Stygian metal?” Wei Wuxian could gather as much from what they’d heard.

A flicker crossed her face, akin to a disturbed surface of perfectly tranquil water. “It is the biggest mistake of my life. Because of it, I’ve used all of my spiritual energy as the price for suppressing the Stygian iron.”

On her palm, she produced an old piece of chipped metal, tarnished but not rusted. This must be the Stygian metal, and Wei Wuxian’s mind raced with questions upon questions and settling for two.

“What’s up with this metal? And the yelling earlier, where do they come from?”

“Since it has been unsealed, my psyche, along with my magical powers, weakens day by day,” she said. “And then you two came. It must be fate.”

Lan Yi spoke of a few hundred years back, when the Stygian metal hadn’t been broken into pieces, and what was presently named Yiling Burial Mounds was then called a holy mountain. She mentioned Xue Chonghai who had been the most powerful advisor to the emperor, and how the facts had been muddled by time as to why he had wielded the Stygian metal to absorb resentment and used human beings as sacrifices. With the Stygian metal, he had controlled a notorious beast known as the Tortoise of Slaughter. Formidable, Xue Chonghai slaughtered cultivators of various sects, both big and small.

“The five major sects,” Wei Wuxian began. “They banded together to bring him down.”

“Indeed. It cost a lot of lives, and the Yiling holy mountain became the Burial Mounds for the fallen.”

“Elder, where was the Stygian metal after that?” Lan Zhan asked.

“It absorbed numerous living beings’ spiritual awareness, and all the resentment couldn’t be contained.”

“The metal was capable of spirit consumption?” Wei Wuxian asked in disbelief.

He’d read of theories and the subjects that encompassed spiritualism, and he would wager that not all the scholars who scribed and penned those in old books and dusty scrolls had seen half of what they’d written in practice, one of those about how a spirit could transform into its own awareness that was capable of destroying either itself or another, or capable to growing itself by multitudes through absorption or consumption.

“The Stygian metal was originally a national treasure that could absorb nature’s natural aura,” Lan Yi said. “Xue Chonghai used that ability to absorb living beings’ awareness and cultivators’ spirit essence, and because of this the resentment completely polluted the metal and can never be cleansed. The closest to suppression the five greatest clans managed was to divide the metal into pieces, stored in four locations where the spiritual vein is in abundance in four cardinal locations. To prevent the same mistake of Xue Chonghai, it was agreed not to pass the knowledge of Stygian iron to any of the future descendants.”

“Forgive me for speaking directly, Elder, but using the logic of absorption, why not absorb instead the opposite of resentment, an amount that can overwhelm the resentment within? And the iron must have its limits too for it’s not a pocket of unlimited space to contain everything there is. Why not stuff it full of resentment until it cannot contain all in itself? It doesn’t have to be the living; the dead or beasts, like the Nie Sect’s way of cultivation. Or—or what if we utilize the resentment within the metal? It won’t be like Xue Chonghai if we—”

“Wei Ying!” exclaimed Lan Zhan. In truth, his volume hardly rose a level, but it was as much of a sound of incredulity at what Wei Wuxian was saying.

She shook her head. “What Young Master Wei said was exactly what I had in mind then. The folly of youth is arrogance and the inexplicable need to prove oneself.” She turned wistful. “As the first female sect leader who wants prestige for her sect and to prove them wrong, I carried those follies through the years and pursued the Stygian iron. It was futile, in the end.” Lan Yi smiled ruefully. “Baoshan Sanren was right.”

Wei Wuxian jolted. “B-Baoshan Sanren?”

“She was a good friend, and she tried to stop me. I’m a fool for not listening.” Her eyes were distant, regretful. “I thought I could enlighten it on my own but merely ended up unsealing the iron. Once unsealed, it couldn’t be reversed. Now here I am in Han Tan Cave, unable to leave after I used my psyche instead. I might not have passed away all those years ago, but I’ve been fading away since then.”

A slow death and dying alone. Wei Wuxian couldn’t think of anything worse.

“What happened to my grandmaster?” he asked quietly.

“Grandmaster?”

Wei Wuxian nodded. “My mother, Cangse Sanren, was a disciple of Baoshan Sanren. She lived with her master and came down from her mountain. She met my biological father afterward and had me.”

“I didn’t know.” Lan Yi stared at him in wonder. “Who would have thought that Baoshan Sanren would take a disciple? We were both young back then, and last I heard of her she went to seclusion. I was… ashamed to seek her.”

“Elder, I have a question,” Lan Zhan spoke. “Are you the one who brought us here?”

“No, not with my weakening state, but I suspect that it’s the Stygian metal. It has been restless since the past decade when the other pieces resurfaced.”

Wei Wuxian shared a look with Lan Zhan. Someone was aiming to be another Xue Chonghai, and it didn’t bode well for their generation and the next.

“The pieces must be gathered together to seal the iron once more.” Her lips pursed. “Only then will the resentment quieten, and hopefully will be laid to rest here forever, frozen in this cave.”

Lan Zhan clasped his hands in front of him, kneeling. “As a descendant of Gusu Lan Sect, Lan Zhan vows to fulfill this obligation to Elder Lan Yi.”

Wei Wuxian imitated the gesture, much to Lan Zhan’s surprise. “Wei Ying of the Four Seasons sect vows to accomplish this with Lan Zhan.”

“This is a matter of the Gusu Lan alone,” Lan Zhan protested.

“I might be from a different sect, from somewhere far away from here, but it doesn’t mean I’ll stand by when there’s potential harm to many. I might have been raised in jianghu, but my fathers raised me to care for the lives of others,” he declared, glancing briefly at Elder Lan Yi and noticing her soft gaze at them. “Besides, Elder is right. Maybe it is fate that brought us here.”

Personally, Wei Wuxian hadn’t been a believer of fate for it only happened to him once: his baba finding him in that terrible snowstorm, way before Sect Leader Jiang or even death itself found him. He felt the tight grip of Lan Zhan’s silk ribbon against his forearm, connecting him to his owner.

Perhaps this, too, was fate.

❆❆❆

Lan Yi’s fading was inevitable, though for it to happen in front of his eyes brought a disquiet in Wei Wuxian’s stomach. What was left of her spiritual essence exploded into blue fireflies, enchanting and separating into several little lights that would never come together again to form a whole.

They stumbled past an egress that magically appeared on a wall, with Lan Zhan half-dragging him out like he was eager to set out as soon as possible to find the remaining pieces of the Stygian iron.

Heh. He probably was.

Completely forgetting being tied to Lan Zhan, Wei Wuxian misjudged a step, foot tangling with Lan Zhan’s, throwing them both together on the rocky dry ground.

“Well,” began Wei Wuxian, grinning down coquettishly, after finding himself on top of an alarmed Lan Zhan. “This is a nice end to our escapade, Lan-er-gongzi.”

It would be forever etched in his mind, that adorable shade of scarlet.

#fanfic #fanfiction #shl fanfic #cql #chen qing ling #mdzs #untamed fic #crossover #wangxian #wei wuxian #lan wangji #the untamed #word of honor #wwx gets adopted by wenzhou

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x-reader-theater · 4 years

Text

Doubt {3}

Relationship: Lucifer Morningstar x Non-Binary!Reader

Summary: You accompany Lucifer on a case because he wants you to see his side. Also you piss of Detective Douche.

Warnings: Cursing, Graphic Body Horror, Lucifer being a Bastard

Word Count: 3328 words

A/N: Sorry this chapter’s a little shorter. I didn’t have as much to put here withour it making no sense. Next chapter will absolutely make up for it ;). With how many songs there are now, you can make a pretty bangin' playlist, I have to say. Trust me, it all sounds really good together loll. Also, with the music, I tried my hardest to find songs that a. weren't in the actual show (Which is harder than it sounds, trust me) and I didn't fully accomplish it, but I got as many songs as I could that aren't in the show. And b. I tried to find songs that I actually like, songs that are good and not just put in songs because they're about the Devil. Honestly, I had so much fun, and with music being such a big part of my life it was nice to bring the two together. Please like, comment, and reblog. It would mean the world for you to share this. I know it’s not my usual MO, but this was really personal to me being a female presenting Non-Binary person, and there’s no Non-Binary reader stories out there.

If you prefer to read on AO3, you can do so here, but please still reblog and share.

[Prev.] <= [First] => [Next]

Chapter 3: Angel Down

You don't see Lucifer the next morning. You slept in his bed again, though not with him in it. After you were able to come clean about your wings, he practically stormed off, leaving you alone in the bathroom with blood running down your back. You took a quick shower and seeing no one was in Lucifer's bed, you took it. You've slept on his surprisingly comfortable couch this past week, but the bed is far comfier.

You wake up well rested, but the memories of the previous night come flooding back almost immediately and you suddenly feel tired again.

But, you force yourself out of bed and into clean clothes. You soon smell something cooking, and follow your nose out into the main room where the adjoining kitchen is. There, with a “kiss the cook” apron on, is Lucifer. Making breakfast.

"What is this?" You ask, sitting down at the island counter.

Lucifer turns around with a large grin on his face and a skillet in his hands. "Oh! Angel! Good morning!" Lucifer says with a cheery smile on his face. "How are you this morning? Feeling any better?"

You feel confused and you frown at Lucifer. "I'm… fine? Why-why are you doing this?"

"Well, this is my apology. For last night," Lucifer says. "And I want you to cut your wings off."

You freeze, shock on your face as you stare at Lucifer. "Wh-what?" You stand up from your stool. "What do you mean? I told you, I don't want to!"

"Yes, but I want you to!" Lucifer says. "You're not an angel anymore! You have to stop holding onto it. You're a fallen angel! No more wings, no more God!"

"Lucifer, you can't tell me what to do with my wings!" You say.

"I bloody well can! You're living under my roof, under my rules, and if I tell you to do it, you do it because I will not have someone flaunting in my face!"

"Flaunting? You think I'm flaunting?"

Lucifer looks shocked that you would say that. "Well, of course! What else were you doing last night! Just taking them out because you like to?" Lucifer replies, dropping the pan of eggs on the counter behind him.

You hear a ring, but you don't take your eyes off Lucifer. "Yes, because every time I take my shirt off, it’s for you. You really think that?"

"Whoah," you hear someone say, and when you look toward the elevators, you see the doors closing, and Detective Chole Decker standing there with her hands up and a very confused and pained expression on her face. "What is happening."

"Well, detective-" "Detective Decker I can-" "We were just-" "We were arguing about-" "And then they said-"

"Alright!" Chloe says, yelling at the two of you to stop speaking over one another. "Alright. I just came here to get Lucifer."

"Oh really?" Lucifer asks with a smirk.

"Yeah, we have a case. Come on." Detective Decker starts walking away, but Lucifer interrupts her.

"Uh, Detective! Do you think [Y/N] here could join us?" Lucifer asks, taking off his apron and setting it down in front of you.

The detective stops and sighs. "You're not coming with me unless we take her…"

"That's right Detective. And it's them," Lucifer says with a cheery smile.

"Right. Fine. Whatever," the detective says, but she pauses and turns back to you. "Sorry."

You nod and she goes to the elevator. Lucifer grins back at you before going to join her. "And I don't get a say in it, huh?" You ask yourself under your breath, before reluctantly joining them as well.

[Now Playing: Friend of the Devil by Grateful Dead]

You spent the entire ride sitting in silence in the back of Chloe's police cruiser. Lucifer and Chloe talked about the case, a man, mid 50s, murdered in his own home. But you don't say anything. You have nothing to say about the case. You're not a police officer. In fact, from all the research you've been doing about this time, the police aren't exactly your favourite people.

A group of people who are supposed to protect and serve, but who unjustly kill the very people they're supposed to protect. There's a lot of doubt right now about whether the police are even needed.

The three of you arrive at the scene where you see a few officers holding people back from getting too close to the house. The three of you walk inside and Chloe walks up to a man with a notepad who's standing over the body and starts putting on gloves. "What do we got?" She asks.

The man crouches down next to her and points at the man's head, which is in several pieces.

"Gunshot, under the head. Pretty powerful gun," the man says. You look around the room, at the faces there, and listen to the heartbeats of everyone in the room. You see a couple of police officers, none of them too remarkable, but then you see a woman. Well, more like a girl. In her teenage years most likely. Her face is blank as she stares in the direction of the body. You can hear her heart pounding in her chest, pushing up against her ribs. Her face is plain, nothing too extraordinary, but her hair is a mess, she has scratches and bruises all over her, and her cuffs are red, and disappear underneath her black leather jacket. You see peeking out from where the zipper is closed, a light blue colour.

"[Y/N]? Did you hear that?" Lucifer calls to you from the other side of the room.

You shake yourself out of your moment and turn back to the red faced devil. "Huh? What?" You ask.

"The father! He had a plan for his daughter's life! Isn't that nice!" Lucifer says, and you roll your eyes, turning back to the girl in the other room.

"It looks like a suicide. This should be a pretty easy case," the man with the notebook says. He looks up and over at you, and walks towards you. He puts his hand out and says, "Uh, hi. I'm Detective Espinoza. Uh- Dan Espinoza. Are- are you new to the team?"

You look at his hand and then away from him back to the girl. "My name's [Y/N]. Lucifer brought me here to prove a point," you spit out. Looking out the corner of your eye you see Dan's a little shocked. He goes to say something, to protest, but you cut him off. "Who's that?" You ask, pointing to the girl who's looking right through you.

"Uh, that's the victim's daughter, Molly. She's the one who called the police," Detective Espinoza says.

You nod. "Has anyone talked to her?"

"Uh, yeah, a couple people tried, but no one could get through. Chloe's going to talk to her now," he says. "Are you sure-"

You don't let him finish. You just walk away from him towards Molly. When you get close, you see her look up at you.

"Are you here to help me?" She asks you quietly.

"I'm not here to help you, Molly," you reply. "I shouldn't even be talking with you."

"Why not?" She asks.

"The police don't like it when anyone other than them talks to people like you," you reply.

Molly scoffs. "Yeah. What would they know? I saw my father kill himself in front of me," she says, looking at you. You see Chole begin to storm over, but Lucifer puts a hand up, stopping her from moving closer to you. She pulls out a notepad and nods at you to continue.

"Can you tell me what happened, Molly?"

[Now Playing: God's Gonna Cut You Down by Johnny Cash]

"So, Molly comes home from a party she's not supposed to be at, her dad catches her, they get into a fight, he's holding his gun, and shoots himself in the face," Detective Decker says. "It just seems too… easy."

"Well, sometimes things are Chloe," Detective Espinoza says, leaving against Detective Decker's desk.

Lucifer nods. "The father wanted nothing but the best for his child. Is that so bad?"

You can feel the question being directed at you, but you ignore it. "I don't think so. She was hiding something. Her heart was racing, and it only slowed down when she was telling her story. Like-like she practiced it," you say. "And her cuffs were red…"

"No, no, her cuffs were blue," Detective Espinoza says.

You shake your head and look at Lucifer. "Her cuffs were red. And I think that means something."

Lucifer narrows his eyes, like he's trying to discern whether you're telling the truth or not. His face relaxes when you don't look away from him and you stand your ground. Lucifer sighs.

Detective Decker sighs and leans back in her chair. "Okay. I don't know what that is, but, if she is lying, we have to go back and question her again."

"No! No, this is a suicide!" Lucifer says. "It's very obvious."

"No, I really don't think it is," you say. "Did Molly say how she got home?"

Detective Decker shakes her head. "No. And there's no car in the driveway or in the garage… maybe whoever dropped Molly off saw something…"

"Well, she could have walked…" Detective Espinoza supplies.

Detective Decker, again, shakes her head. "No, we interviewed the neighbors. There was loud music that turned off before the sound of a gunshot. There had to be someone else there…"

"Right, we should go back to Molly. Ask her a few questions. Check out the neighborhood, see if we missed anything the first time we went there," Detective Espinoza says.

"Alright, let's go!" Detective Decker says, turning to leave.

"Right, come on [Y/N]," Lucifer says, and when you go to get out of your chair, Detective Espinoza puts a hand up.

"No. You can't keep bringing civilians to crime scenes. Once with Lucifer and now with [Y/N], this needs to stop Chloe," Detective Espinoza says.

Detective Decker sighs and places a hand on her forehead. "Yeah. Yeah. It does. But Lucifer is my partner, and this is my case. So, you need to stay too."

"Wait, what?" Detective Espinoza and Lucifer say at the same time.

"No, you're right," Detective Decker says. "I've been too lenient and you have your own work you need to do. Thanks Dan!"

Chloe smiles and waves at him, walking off. Lucifer looks at her shocked before running to catch up with her. "Detective!"

You turn to Dan, who's staring as the two partners leave. "You okay?" You ask.

"Uh… yeah. I just don't like how much she relies on Lucifer," Dan says. "Anyways, I have work to do. You can sit at my desk until Lucifer comes back and takes you home."

You nod and go over to Dan's desk with him. He starts going through files, answering phone calls, and when he's done with them, he puts them on the edge of his desk right next to you.

You go to reach for one, but he places a hand on it forcefully, glaring at you. "Those are confidential."

You lean back in your chair and put your hands up defensively, rolling your eyes. You look at Dan and squint, trying to discern the type of person he is. His face is not unlike a lot of the others in here, hardened and stained with the blood of innocents. But there's something else about him, something deeper. Looking down at his cuffs, while they're not stained red, they do have beating hearts sewn in. He's an emotional man who likes to talk about how he's feeling, but only with certain people.

You smile at him. "So, why did you become a cop? It couldn't have been for the hours and hours of desk work, huh?"

Dan looks up at you, a genuinely shocked expression on his face. "Oh, uh… well, no I guess not…" he trails off. He scratches the back of his neck and says sheepishly, "Sorry I just… whenever people ask me why I became a cop, they always say, 'Not for the salary, am I right?'" he gives his best cheery smile and then drops it like he can't believe they would say that.

You laugh and wave him away. "Oh I don't care about money, Detective." You put your feet up on his desk and he moves the files out from under you with a glare. "No, I genuinely want to know."

"Oh. Well…" Dan starts, pausing to think. "I guess it's to help people."

You roll your eyes. You hear Dan's heart rate spike as he says this. "I don't think that's the whole truth, Dan…" you say, leaning in. You watch his Adam's Apple bob as he swallows thickly, his eyes glancing away from yours. You see the sclera are tinted a strange red, like he's been awake one too many nights. He works long hours, and puts a lot of time into it.

Huh.

"It's not because you get to muder innocent, unarmed black people and have no consequences, is it?" You ask. Dan looks up at you sharply as you say that. "I mean, what was it, only a month ago, Officer Greene and his partner Officer Ackers killed a black man in the streets and what happened to them?" You ask Dan lowly, leaning in with malice. You drop your feet to the floor and place your hands on his desk. "They are sitting 100 feet away from us right now, eating doughnuts and talking about going out on another patrol. Is that why you like this job, Detective Espinoza?"

"No! Of course that's not why I like my job!" Espinoza says loudly. Heads turn in your direction, and the detective lowers his voice. "No. But I can't exactly do anything about it. I'd lose my badge, my gun."

You scoff and roll your eyes. "But isn't that worth it? To keep the streets a little safer? Because those two officers are going to do it again. And again. And again, unless they're stopped. But you're afraid because you'll lose your job? Well, just because you're not pulling the trigger yourself, doesn’t mean that you're not still killing these people."

You push away from his desk, and you don't look back as you make your way through the precinct, and you walk back to Lux.

[Now Playing: Forgiven by Alanis Morissettte]

"What are you doing here? When Detective Douche told me you left I didn't know where you went," Lucifer says as he walks into Lux. "Daniel looked very upset when we walked in, very broody. What did you do to him?"

You shrug as you down another sip from the bottle of Prosecco you are drinking. "We talked about being a police officer, why he was a cop, things like that. I guess I got under his skin, made him doubt a little." You shrug again and hold out the bottle to Lucifer who takes it and pours some of the sparkling beverage into a glass. He hands you back the bottle and you take a long drink from it. "So, what ended up happening with the case?"

Lucifer laughs lightly and says, "Turns out, it was the boyfriend. The girl, Molly, she got him the gun, he shot the dad, and they were going to run off together, but she got a guilty conscience. Decided to call the police."

"Huh." You take another sip. "So, why did they kill the dad?"

"She said it was because he controlled her life too much, forced and manipulated her into doing things she didn't want to do," he says dismissively.

You buff out a laugh. "That sounds familiar," you mutter into another sip. A little bit of Prosecco dribbles down your chin and you wipe it away with the back of your hand. Lucifer raises an eyebrow towards you. "What, you don't see any resemblance there?" Lucifer just looks at you. "Lucifer, I was able to connect with Molly because I saw myself in her. Someone in your life trying to control what you do." You reach out and place a hand on Lucifer's, lightly. "If I want to cut my wings off, it will be on my own terms. Not yours or anyone else's. And you can't tell me what to do. Or else I may kill you."

Lucifer chuckles. "You can't kill me. I'm immortal."

You shrug but the doors fly open and Detective Decker walks in. "You have no right!" She yells, pointing a finger in your direction.

"Oh! Hello detective! To what do we owe the pleasure!" Lucifer asks with a cheery smile on his face.

"You can not talk to Dan like that!" The detective yells at you, ignoring Lucifer. You take another sip of your sparkling wine. "Why would you even say something like that?"

"I'm sorry, but I don't know what you're talking about, detective," you say with an innocent smile on your face.

"Oh you know exactly what I'm talking about you little weasel," she says, leaning into your face. "About Frank and Raaj. About the shooting that happened a month ago. How could you say those things to him?"

"Because detective," you say, standing up out of your chair, your faces at equal level now. You lean in to her with a scowl. "I make people doubt. Doubt what they love most because most of the time, it isn't as good as it seems."

The bottle in your hand shatters and the pieces fall to the floor, and the rest of the sparkling drink falls into your lap. You don't break eye contact with the detective.

"I think you should also think about what I said to Dan, detective," you say, spitting the word detective in her face. Like she doesn't deserve to be one. "Because, why are you a police officer? 'To do the right thing'?" You scoff. "Yeah right. You like the thrill you get when you fire the gun, when you see a bullet enter the person's body. You like shooting people. You. Like. Killing."

She goes to lunge at you, but Lucifer steps in, pushing her back, away from you. "Alright. Alright. Detective, I think you should go."

"You think I should go? What about her? Shouldn't she be the one who leaves?" The detective asks and you flinch.

"They live here, detective. You do not. You have a daughter to take care of," Lucifer says calmly, and the detective huffs, but doesn't say anything. You look away from her at the floor, at the broken bottle pieces littering the floor of Lux. Eventually, you hear her loud footsteps echoing across the room, until, eventually, the doors close behind her, and they fade away into the night.

"I'm sorry," you say to Lucifer, still not looking him in the eyes.

"What do you have to be sorry about?" Lucifer asks. You feel fingers underneath your chin and he tilts your face up to his. "This is what you do. You're the fallen angel of doubt. This is your job."

You smile and nod. "Yeah. It is." You look down again at the floor. "Though, I am sorry I ruined a perfectly good bottle of Prosecco," you say and Lucifer laughs.

The two of you kneel down, picking up pieces, and you have a good pile of them when you hear Lucifer curse.

"Shit," he says, and looking over, you see him holding his hand, and he's bleeding.

"Lucifer?" You ask, moving toward him.

You crawl through the glass and grab his hand, not forcefully, but enough to tug it towards you, where you see, real, red blood dripping down his already red finger. "Lucifer…" you breathe out, looking up at him. "How is this possible?"

[Now Playing: Broken Bones by KALEO]

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