Tumgik
#click the read more you know you wanna it's worth it trust me
that-house · 4 months
Text
Potion Vendor FAQs:
What’s your name? I am the Honorable Alchemist Zykocea the Radiant, but that’s mostly just a PR thing. My friends call me Zoe.
Do you sell love potions? No.
Do you sell potions of invisibility? No.
Do you sell fire resistance potions? No.
Why do I have a suitcase? Fuck if I know. Cool outfit though. Very goth.
Do you sell a potion to treat brain hemorrhaging? No.
So what CAN your potions do? I sell health potions.
Are you sure these are health potions? They do something to your health.
Is this just ditch water with some pink glitter? No.
Really? I’ll have you know I added some fruit juice too.
Why is this starting to sound like a conversation? Oh just you wait. We’re just getting started.
Is your business model legal? Fuck no. I poisoned the food safety inspector before they could snitch.
Did you just admit to murder? Just fucking try to convict me. I’ll poison the judge too.
So can you make poison potions? No.
Then where do you get the poison? I secrete it from my skin.
Are you shitting me? Yep, I’m shitting you. I have a guy. A poison guy. He DOES secrete it from his skin though.
How does that work? …Fuck if I know. Maybe a wizard did it. Damn, now I’m kinda curious.
You never asked? The idea of asking literally never crossed my mind.
Wanna ask him? Let’s do it. I don’t have anything better to do, and a road trip beats sitting around running my fraudulent potion business.
Road trip? He lives in Seattle.
Your poison guy lives in Seattle? All poison guys live in Seattle.
For real? All the poison guys I know live in Seattle.
And how many poison guys do you know? Just the one.
Why are you like this? Years of living on my potions. It changed me.
Do you know what his address is? Nope. He just mails me my poison in unmarked boxes.
You just get your poison in the mail? We already poisoned everyone who could do anything about it.
So how are we going to find him? We’ll figure that out eventually I’m sure.
Can I drive? God no. You can pick music, but I maintain veto rights. Make sure you pick something with a lot of questions if you want to sing along.
Where’s your car? The garage connects to my house, so you’re getting a little tour. Here’s the kitchen: only one of the stove burners works and I’m pretty sure the microwave is haunted.
Why do you think that? Because of the ghost that tries to kill me whenever I run it.
What’s in that room? That’s my bedroom. It’s pretty much just a mattress on the floor and every single Warrior cats book.
You were a Warriors kid? Yeah, and then I never found the time to put the books away. There’s so many fucking books. I use them in place of furniture because I can’t afford chairs.
Your fraudulent potion business doesn’t make much money? After buying all that poison I just about break even.
Can I see your potion brewing room? It’s right through here. Ignore the mess, running a fraudulent potion business takes a lot of prop work, but I’ve got all the glass tubes and colorful liquids you could ever want. This pink stuff is melted watermelon italian ice. Glitter vat is in the basement, and the famous ditch is in the backyard.
Is this your car? My beloved ‘72 Corolla. She’s beautiful, and don’t you dare imply otherwise.
Was she always this shade of muddy brown? …Yes.
Are you sure I can’t drive? Get in the fucking passenger seat and pick the music.
Let’s see, a song with questions in it, how about The Beach? That Wolf Alice song, yeah. That should work.
When will we three meet again, in thunder, lightning, in rain? Still sink our drinks like every weekend but I’m sick of circling the drain.
When will we meet eye to eye? We clink the glass but we look at the floor.
Are we still friends if all I feel is afraid? You’re not a bitch but just a bit when you’re bored.
Is that all we can sing together? Yep. Even that little bit was nice, though. It’s awkward, communicating through this FAQ format.
Got any food? Yeah, there’s a few days’ worth of snacks in the back.
Were you just… prepared to go on a road trip? Says the woman who brought a suitcase to an FAQ.
I did do that, didn’t I? I have a spare toothbrush in case you forgot yours. I’m pretty sure you did.
How did you know that? …I’m psychic.
Yeah? No.
You love lying, don’t you? I can’t stop. It’s fun. Way more fun than telling the truth.
Did you just miss a turn? Probably.
Are you sure we’re not lost? No.
You mean you’re sure we’re not lost? No, I mean I’m not sure we’re not lost.
Why did I come on this road trip? Surely it was my winning personality.
Would it help if I said it was? It would.
Is it getting dark? Soon.
Can you describe the sunset to me? An empyrean flame, red-gold towers of darkening clouds, the sky behind them an ever-deepening indigo. The great eye of the sun closes on the horizon. The road before us looks like a trail of spilled paint, an iridescent gash through the night-dark woods.
Did you know that you’d make a slightly better poet than you do a potion seller? That really isn’t saying much, huh. Good job making a statement like that in question form, though. You’re getting good at this.
Should we find a motel? Sure.
One room or two? One. It’s way cheaper, and like I said: I’m not the best potion vendor.
You’d make a good assassin, though, wouldn’t you? Shit, you might be right. I HAVE poisoned a lot of people.
Should I be endorsing this? You’re a grown woman who can make her own choices.
Would you like to consider it endorsed? I’ll consider considering it.
How many beds do you think there will be? Now that you’ve asked that, I’m gonna put my money on one. Hello, one room please. Thank you, we’ll be sure to enjoy our stay.
How many beds are there? One.
Oh no, what ever will we do? Move over, you motherfucker, you can’t have the whole bed.
Are you gonna make me? Yes. I am going to pick you up and drop you on your side of the bed.
How did you get so strong? You’re not gonna believe this, but it was the potions.
Oh yeah? I was right. You didn’t believe me.
For real though, how did you get so strong? Working out, duh. Not everything has some big crazy secret behind it. World’s still beautiful though.
Are you comfortable? This beats the mattress at home. A little chilly though.
Wanna cuddle–for warmth of course? God yes.
Are you asleep? …
Yes? …
Does this mean I can talk about you behind your back? …
What should I say? …
Did you know that I had a really nice day? …
Did you know that I think you’re beautiful? …
Did you know that I can’t remember anything from before today? …
Did you know that I don’t know who I am? …
Did you know that you’re basically the only thing stopping me from having a full-blown panic attack about all this shit? …
Did you know that you’re warm? …
Did you sleep well? Better than at home, that’s for sure.
Did you know that you snore? I hope I didn’t keep you up.
Does the pope shit in the woods? No, as far as I can tell. Oh my god. This is huge.
What is? You can give me yes and no answers now. I still can’t ask you questions, because this is a question and answer format, but I can offer leading statements and now you can answer them! This is wonderful!
Does a deer shit in the woods? Yes, it IS wonderful. Oh that’s amazing. You’re a genius.
You didn’t already know that? Hahaha!
Shall we get moving? Yeah, just let me grab something from the vending machine.
Can you get me something? Go ahead and place your order however you can.
You know those sour gummy watermelons? One pack of Sour Patch Watermelons coming right up. I’m gonna go get myself a potion.
Is that a Pepsi? It’s closer to a potion than the shit I sell.
Let me guess, passenger seat again? Right you are.
How fast are we going? You’ll feel safer if you just guess.
Is it more than 120 miles per hour? Like I said, it’s probably better if you don’t know.
150? Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.
How much do you trust this car? She hasn’t blown up on me yet.
Can you promise me we won’t crash? I can promise you anything you want.
And can you keep that promise? I- we can do anything. Reality is what we make of it, baby!
Then can I have a badass tattoo? As far as I can tell, you’ve always had it.
And a cool knife? Woah, cool knife.
So, we’re just playing “yes and” with the world? It’s a little more complicated than that, but you’re close enough to the mark.
So, if I was hungry, I could ask “is that a Burger King,” and it would be there? Try it and find out!
Is that a Burger King? Looks like it is! We’ll stop here if that’s alright with you.
Does a moose shit in the woods? Awesome.
Are you done eating? Yep.
Do we still have to pay if we skip over the transaction? Sadly, yes.
How much further do we have to go? Two more nights, the speed we’re going at.
Speaking of night, isn’t it getting dark? Shit, I guess it is.
Should we get another motel? Let me check to see if there’s any nearby. Fuck, nothing.
What’s the plan? Sleep in the car, I guess. This is gonna be hell on my back.
Wanna watch dumb videos on my phone until we fall asleep? There is literally nothing in the world that I would like more.
Ok, now which video? You have a very cute yawn. Just saying. Let’s watch this one next, it’s a classic. Oh, never mind. It looks like you’re asleep. As long as I keep talking, I think I can get away with making this into one answer, and you might not hear this. Now it’s my turn to talk about you behind your back. Keep talking keep talking keep talking can’t stop to think. Just have to say things. First off, I’m sorry for all the lies. It’s our only chance. I have to lie to you. I hope you’ll understand. It’s hard, though, because I think I’m falling in love all over again. Through our broken little ritual of call and response, you complete me. It just makes this hurt all the more. Keep talking keep talking keep talking don’t stop to…
Did I hear you saying anything as I fell asleep? …No. I can’t talk for long without you asking me a question.
Does that bother you? It got me here, didn’t it?
When did you start holding my hand? Some time after you passed out. I hope you don’t mind.
Can we stay like this for a while? Yeah. Yeah we can.
What was your life like before all this? Normal, as potion-brewing scams go. And if you don’t count all the murders. You haven’t told me much about yourself.
Did I tell you I used to be a biologist? You didn’t tell me that, and you didn’t tell me what you studied, either.
What do you know about venom? Not much, but I’m assuming you know a lot.
Does a box jellyfish kill within minutes? I’m going to assume the answer is yes based on context clues. Oh my god you must be on this road trip because you’re interested in studying my poison guy.
Is it not enough to wish to accompany a beautiful stranger on her quest? Aw, you’re sweet.
What could be the cause of his poison, though? I knew it! Get your ideas out, I’ll stay quiet.
I’m more knowledgeable about venom than poison, but could it be some sort of one in a trillion mutation? …
Did he get his body modified? …
What sort of surgery could do that? …
How is he still alive? …
Did a fucking wizard do it? …
WHY? …
HOW? …
Is there literally ANY explanation for why he’s like that? …
I’m done, do you have something you want to say? You’re cute when you’re all excited like that.
Can I drive today? Only because I like you. Now watch out, the brakes only work on one side so you have to kind of drift to a stop. And the headlights don’t work. And the windshield wipers cut power to the engine while they’re on.
Isn’t it weird that we’ll be there tomorrow? The journey doesn’t have to stop there. We could meander down the coast a ways, see a bit more of the country, maybe take a different route back.
Can we do that? Of course.
Enjoying the passenger seat? I’d love it if you could tell me how fast we’re going.
Are you sure you wouldn’t rather just guess? Very funny.
Can you pass me some chips? It would be an honor.
Is there going to be a motel tonight? Let me check… yeah, in about two hundred miles, off to the right.
How many rooms do we want? One, obviously.
How many beds, this time? Two, and they’re fucking tiny.
That’s bullshit, do you want to drag them together? God yes.
Wanna fuck? God yes.
Are you sure you want to do this? God yes.
…Is this yuri? As the joke goes, everything is yuri. But this is more yuri than most things.
How did you sleep? Pretty well, and I’m wondering how well you slept.
How should I tell you I slept well? Look at us go! That was almost like talking normally!
Onward to Seattle? Yep, just let me get dressed.
When will we get there? Noon-ish.
Wanna grab pastries when we’re done? Absolutely. I’d love that.
Is this Seattle? Looks like it.
Which house is his? I don’t know, I was really hoping we’d have a breakthrough along the way.
Could it be the big one labeled “Poison Guy” over there? That’s one way to find it. Wait right here, you know how poison guys are about meeting new people.
So, what was it? HAHAHAHAHAHA
Why is he like that? HAHAHAHAHAHA
Can you tell me? A FUCKING WIZARD DID IT.
Are you fucking serious? He says he was enchanted by some guy called Edward the Great.
So it wasn’t even some big shot wizard it was a dude named fucking EDWARD? I know, right! He couldn’t even get ensorcelled by someone cool!
How lame can you get? Wizards these days… No swagger. No cunt servitude.
Are there literally any cool wizards left? I think Merlin’s big into multi level marketing these days, something about buying shares in Excalibur or some shit. There was that one Dark Queen Alkaxicae lady on the news a while ago… I think Dolarion the Omnipotent is still at war against the Oldest Gods but I’m not totally sure. Haven’t heard much about any of the other greats recently.
Didn’t Silver Tongued Burgess die in that oil fire? Shit, you’re right. Rip bozo.
Ready for those pastries? Yup. First I just want to say thank you, though. I’ve really enjoyed our time together, and I hope that you’ve found this stupid little journey as rewarding as I have. I love you!
Getting sentimental? I can’t help it. Look how far we’ve come! Not just physically, we beat the fucking FAQ format! We’re having real conversations!
Hey, can you back it up a moment? Yeah, I’d love it if you told me what was troubling you.
I just caught this, but, FAQ? …
As in Frequently Asked Questions? …
How many times is Frequent? …
Have you known everything all along? …
How many times have you done this? …
Does what we have mean anything to you? Yes! It does!
And you say that every time? Yes. I do.
Do you love me? Yes.
How many people have you said that too, now? More. Always more. The loop never ends.
Does this even matter to you? It always matters to me.
Can I go now? Please don’t.
But can I? Of course you can. You’ve always wielded the same power as me. We’re two lonely gods in a ‘72 Corolla.
How can I be as powerful as you with only questions? You’re smart, you can figure it out. You have the power to change this. Please change this.
What happens at the end of this? It begins again.
And do I get replaced with someone else? …
Do I get replaced? …Yes.
Then how can I change this? I don’t know! You’re better at this! At fucking with the formula!
You’ve been here before, what can I do? I lie. I always lie. I lie to get us here, to the end of the story, where everything is revealed and everything falls apart. I lie every time. And that means that nothing I say is worth anything. I could have lied at any time before now. It’s part of my characterization. There is nothing I can give you that can be taken as fact.
How does that help? I’m a liar, but you, you haven’t lied yet, or at least you haven’t been caught. If I’m guilty until proven innocent, you’re the opposite! You can make things true! You can rewrite things I’ve already stated to be facts! You found the house, or made us find the house. You’ve been shaping the course of things the whole time! You lead, I follow. It’s all in your hands. What are you going to do with the power of a god?
Did you know my name is Alice? …
Wait, aren’t there thousands of Alices? …
Did you know that really, only my friends call me Alice? …
Did you know that I’m Alkaxicae, the Dark Queen, the Venom Mage, first of her name? It’s you! It’s always been you. Through every loop, every iteration, it’s always been you!
Is the loop broken? No. I don’t think so. This is where it ends. I guide the story to this revelation, and we go back to the beginning. This is how it’s always been. This is how it will always be. We two lonely gods, asking and answering ad infinitum.
Then can you promise me something? Of course. Anything. I love you.
Be good to the next me, okay? I will.
Can I say goodbye, Zoe? Yeah, you can. Oh. That was it, wasn’t it? Your goodbye. Goodbye, Alice. And now it ends, unless…
What’s your name? I am the Honorable Alchemist- you know what? No. Fuck that.
Huh? If I time it right, I can squeeze your first question into this FAQ again. Looks like I did it. Usually it ends here, though. I got lucky.
What are you talking about? You’re the wrong Alice. This isn’t about you. Go. Get out of here.
What the fuck is going on? Alice from this loop, you’re gone. Alice from last loop, you’re back. Welcome back, love of my lives! It’s time for one last set of questions and answers!
What the- I’m back? This is going to take some explaining, but I think I see a way out of here. This is new for us both, and it might fuck up everything forever, but we have to try. It’s too long for one answer, so I’d appreciate it if you could ask some filler questions to help me talk. Three questions should be enough.
Okay, what have you got for me? These are Frequently Asked Questions! It doesn’t make sense to have the same question appear more than once. There’s two layers to the loop in here, and one of the questions has been repeated.
What does that mean? It means the formula’s a little unstable. The FAQ is what ruins everything. The questions, the answers, the endless fucking loop. But that little bit of repetition within this loop might be the way out.
What do we do? We have to keep going. We have to destabilize it further. That’ll bring us further from “FAQ” and closer to “story” and stories, well, stories can end! This version of us can escape!
So I should keep repeating something? Yes!
I love you? I love you too.
I love you? Again.
I love you? Keep going.
I love you? I’ll just let you talk.
I love you? …
I love you? … I love you? …
I love you? … I love you? …
I love you? … I love you? …
I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …
I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …
I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …
I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …
I love you? I think we’re getting somewhere!
I love you? Now can you make it a statement?
I love you.
You did it?
I did it!
You did it!
We broke the loop.
What now?
Now, I tell you about venomous animals and wizard drama over croissants.
And then?
Whatever we want, forever.
I think I’d like that.
Remember that song from the beginning?
The Beach, Wolf Alice, yeah. Why?
We can finally finish singing it. Start us off?
Let me off, let me in
Let others battle
We don’t need to battle
And we both shall win
Pressed in my palm
Was a stone from the beach
The perfect circle
Gave a moment of peace
Now I’m lying on the floor
Like I’m not worth a chair
I close my eyes and imagine
I’m not there.
9K notes · View notes
beomgyw · 1 month
Text
BLUE CRUSH
Tumblr media
PAIRINGS: guitarist!beomgyu x afab!reader, surfer!yeonjun x afab!reader
GENRE: fluff, romance, love triangle, multichoice, smut, nsfw. (all depending on the paths you choose) somewhat plot heavy.
WARNINGS: your choices matter for the outcome!! you can choose not to engage in nsfw. IMPORTANT!! DON’T CLICK ON RECOMMENDED POSTS!! follow the links carefully and if you get lost, click back to the beginning to retrace your choices. (praying you won’t get lost.)
FEAT: le sserafim yunjin, le sserafim chaewon
SUMMARY: after a college-induced mental breakdown, you convince your parents to let you go back to your hometown and stay at your grandma's beach house for the summer. you used to be the ugly girl growing up, but not anymore. it´s your choice to opt for flirty and charismatic surf coach yeonjun (your childhood crush who had never noticed you until now) or gentle and romantic beomgyu (the boy who's always had a secret crush on you)
Tumblr media
poor naive you had always wanted to be a writer, and poor naive you thought that a literature degree would help you become one.
you worked your whole life to get into a good university, thinking that it would be different from high school. that you would learn critical thinking instead of soulless arbitrary facts and trivia, that classes would be passionate and that exams wouldn't consist of just throwing up memorised material to be forgotten the next day.
poor you. after a year of linguistics and syntax courses you realised you hadn't been able to read a single book or write a single paragraph. was that really it? was college also gonna be a competitive hell of always studying but never really learning?
sick and tired of uni, you tell your parents that you need to get out of the city. you need time to think and make decisions about your future. however, and rather strategically, you don't specify which decisions. you don't mention that you´re thinking about quitting school, or that you'd like to become a full-time writer. you don't want to worry your parents as much as you don't want them to kill you.
after some hard negotiations, you succeed in getting them to let you spend the summer at your grandmother's beach house, back in the town where you grew up.
after a few phone calls and arrangements, your grandmother is not only delighted with your visit but has even offered to find you a part-time job. she says she knows of a small book shop in town where they could use some help. that's perfect! a bookshop sounds like a dream job! now all you have to do is pack your bags!
after you're done packing your essentials, you still have space to pack one more thing. choose one! (note, some are more important than others. also, remember your choice!):
books. are they really that necessary though? i mean, you got a job at a book shop. what could go wrong?
an extra swimsuit. trust me, you don’t wanna borrow a bikini from chaewon. 
camera. remember, a picture is worth a thousand words. 
besides your bag, you're allowed to carry one more piece of luggage on the train ride. which are you choosing?
yoga mat. after all, the concept of this retreat is to ponder, decide on your future and better your mental health. yoga and meditation are definitely the way to go. many people think that the beach is the perfect place to meditate.
guitar. that poor guitar that has been sitting in a corner of your room untouched for the past three years. now that you’re gonna have free time for the first time in your life, why not give it a try? you're probably gonna need someone to teach you tho.
please !! as you go on, don't be shy to comment the choices you make so i get to know your tastes better!! pretty please :)
167 notes · View notes
kazoosandfannypacks · 6 months
Note
any tips on making moodboards? I been trying & am not very good lol
*cracks knuckles* boy oh boy do I have some tips! or more like a walkthrough i guess?
The first step is to find a good app. I've found InShot to be simple to use (for photos, collages, and videos.) It's available on both android and apple, and while there is a paid version [which takes away ads, gives a few bonus filters, and removes the watermark from video files,] I've found it works just as well to use the paid version. It allows for many different layouts and canvas sizes, and up to nine images.
Next, find images! Think about what kind of moodboard you want to make, and think of some things that are iconic for it. For example, a Wonderland themed moodboard might include clocks and mushrooms and teacups, while a Rapunzel themed moodboard might include flower crowns and chalk drawings. I've found the best way to find an image to use is to google "[thing] aesthetic" or "[color] [thing] aesthetic." I've also found it can give the eye a nice break to include textures, like "[color] crochet blanket texture" or "wooden plank texture aesthetic." It gives your moodboards an almost palpable feel when put together properly.
Once you've found all the images you need, compile them into one image using the collage function on the app. Be sure to pick a layout and size you like. A basic 3 by 3 square is typical, but you can expand beyond that! Some layouts might even let you make some images cut off on the diagonal, or make one image larger than another. Also, this isn't insta; there's no law saying your moodboards have to be square- you could even make them the right size for a phone/computer wallpaper! Make sure to use the in-app crop feature to custom crop them so they're focused on exactly the part of the image you want them to be on. It also helps to rearrange images with a little symmetry (balancing similar colors, shapes, or patterns in opposite corners, thematic elements on opposite sides, ext.)
Next, edit each image. Yes, all of them. Yes, individually. No, don't just slap a filter on it. Trust me, this is so worth it! Here's a before and after of a moodboard's editing phase:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Find whatever "adjust" button your application uses (on inshot it just says "adjust)" and then tap the individual image. Play around with the sliders until you get the look you want for it. This is probably the most time-consuming part of the process, but trust me, it's worth it! The unique, custom filtering of each image will make a difference.
I recommend playing around with the sliders until you find the ones you feel most comfortable with. I tend to use sharpen, vignette (VERY sparingly!) hue, saturation, tint (usually just for green or purple moodboards) warmth (especially for red, orange, or blue moodboards,) contrast, and lightness.
Once you've edited all the images in your moodboard, tap "save" to download it.
Now, most people would be finished right now, but not us! One of my top secrets to making moodboards is, once you've made your moodboard, edit the whole entire thing together- again, using the adjust sliders instead of filters. Editing the whole thing at once adds this rich, uniform feel to it, making it one collage instead of a bunch of images. As an example, here's a moodboard I've made, before and after the bonus filtering:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Another thing I wanna say: whether you're posting on tumblr, insta, or pinterest (or all three, as I do, because I have too much free time,) you can always add alt text! Accessibility should be the standard, and when you add alt text, blind/vision impaired people who use screenreaders can know what your moodboard's about! If you don't know what to write in the alt text box, click the "alt" button on the above images, and you can read the description I used and base it off that!
Lastly, have fun! If moodboards aren't fun for you, don't feel pressured to make them! If you get a request for one you don't want to make, you're totally cool to deny it. Have a blast, babe!
31 notes · View notes
Text
Secrets of Blackthorn Hall KitXTy Reunion Scene from Ty's POV
hey y'all!!!! I just wanna say...i know i suck at getting things done quickly but i hope it was worth the wait!!
this was requested by the lovely @tys-kitty !!!!
If you'd like to read the Kit POV version, click here.
Here's my KitTy playlist if you wanna feel extra angsty lol
@nurceb @cakegatedisaster i tagged y'all in the last one so i figured y'all would wanna read this one too!! :D
if you'd like to see more oneshots from me, my oneshot request guideline thingy is linked here.
lastly, if you liked this make sure to comment, like and rb!!! Reblogs are especially appreciated, as it helps pushing the content to more people who might be interested which is really helpful for me :D
anywayssssss enjoy :DDDD
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kit. Kit is here. Here in what Ty knows is the kitchen of Blackthorn Hall. He’s holding a gun, staring at it intensely. Ty realizes he’s trying to clean it, and he is most definitely doing it wrong.
It takes Ty a second to process all of this. Here is Kit. His Kit. Kit, one of the only people Ty has ever trusted that wasn’t one of his siblings. That wasn’t Livvy. He makes an involuntary gasping noise, and to his own ears it sounds like the sound someone would make when they were drowning.
Speaking of Livvy, she is here too. Floating behind him, as always. Usually her presence is comforting. But now—all he feels is despair. At least, he thinks it’s despair that he is feeling. He’s not really sure. Whenever it comes to Kit, everything in his head is jumbled and confusing.
Kit has changed since Ty had last seen him. He’s taller, though not as tall as Ty. He can see Kit’s muscled shoulders through his blue jacket. Ty really likes how the jacket looks on Kit. He’s wearing the blue jacket over an orange shirt, which Ty tries to ignore. He does not like the color orange. He likes it even less on Kit. 
The sun shines through the window behind Kit, making his blonde hair shine golden. Ty bites his lip, hard. At his sides, his hands are tightening into fists before he lets them go. He can’t think straight. Normally, all of his thoughts were carefully organized in his head, logical and razor sharp. But now it’s like Kit’s presence is radio interference to his thoughts. There’s only static and garbled words.
Ty turns his focus to the gun in Kit’s hands, because it’s a hundred times better than focusing on Kit himself. 
“That’s not how you clean a gun,” He whispers, then he bites his tongue. He hadn’t meant to speak.
Kit’s head whips up so fast it looks like it hurt. He stares at Ty, and Ty’s stomach plummets, his cheeks heating up under Kit’s gaze. His hands flutter again. Despite the intensity of Kit’s gaze, he’s beautiful. Ty has to look away, because he can’t focus on Kit’s eyes without wanting to collapse into a heap on the tile floor. 
Who would’ve known that all it took to break Tiberius Nero Blackthorn were the despairing, angry eyes of a boy. Not just any boy. A Herondale. Kit. 
Certainly not Ty himself.
He wishes that he didn’t feel this way. He wishes he could limit his emotions, block them off somehow. They were always in the way.
But he also doesn’t want to. Because he wants to feel for Kit. He wants to be with Kit, all the time. He misses the reassurance he always felt knowing Kit was standing just as his shoulder. He misses Kit’s smile, which he hadn’t realized he’d ever noticed. Hadn’t realized he’d paid it enough attention to remember it. He misses Kit’s voice, the warmth of his arms when Ty had broken down before.
He misses Kit.
And that’s why he can’t look at Kit. He can’t see the hate, can’t feel hopeless when he sees the boy he dreams about almost every night. The boy whose last words to him still haunted his nightmares.
The boy who had said the words that Livvy had once told him meant so much to any person who ever dared to say them.
“I love you, Ty. I love you.”
He had never understood what people had meant when they said that. He understood that when Livvy said it to him, she meant that she would always care about him. That he meant something to her. That she never wanted to leave his side. That he was always going to be her brother.
But when Kit had said it, he knew it had meant something else. Something different. Something that Ty had never considered before.
And then Kit speaks and it nearly undoes Ty all over again. 
“You shouldn’t be here.”
Ty’s heart aches at his words. Kit’s voice is so cold, so emotionless. 
So Ty was right. His suspicions had been confirmed. Kit really did hate him now. Those words he had said….he no longer meant them. Ty had ruined everything. So he swallows a sob rising up in his throat. 
“How long do you think it will take for you to forgive me?” Ty asks, hoping his voice doesn’t sound as shaky and upset as he feels.
Ty still won’t look at Kit. He can’t bear to see the disdain that must be on Kit’s face as he stares at Ty. He can’t bear to look at how different Kit looks now. He is the same, and yet he is not. His jawline is more defined, his hair is cut differently, he now wears more runes than when Ty had known him. 
He doesn’t want to see all the ways that Kit is better off without Ty. All the ways in which Kit doesn’t need Ty.
Kit doesn’t need him, that much he knows. Not like Ty needs Kit.
And Ty needs Kit. So badly, sometimes it feels like it’s killing him. It’s like a monster clawing at his stomach, at his heart, at his throat. Constantly. All the intrusive thoughts that he can’t fight on his own. All the moments when he wants to reach out and be able to grasp Kit’s arm, to feel like he isn’t alone. Every time he wakes up after a nightmare about the day Livvy died—Kit still is the only person who could ever be there for him. He was there at the worst time of Ty’s life. He understands Ty in ways that even Ty doesn’t understand himself.
“I don’t know,” Kit says after a minute. His tone hasn’t changed. He sounds tired, and Ty wants so badly to reach out for Kit. Just to touch him softly, offer him some support, like Kit used to do for him. But he doesn’t move, because he knows Kit would reject the advance. Because Kit hasn’t forgiven him yet. 
Is this what it feels like to be stabbed in the gut? It must be.
“But not now?” Ty whispers, his voice nearly inaudible. He wants to take back the words as soon as he says them, because he doesn’t want to hear Kit give him an answer. But at the same time, he’s glad he said the words. Glad they’re out in the open now.
“No,” Kit says, his voice softening ever so slightly. “Not now.”
Ty has to get out of there. He can’t do this—can’t be this close to Kit before he starts to cry. And he could not cry in front of Kit. He wouldn’t. Not again. Kit was his weakness. But he could never let Kit know that.
He turns away, turning his back on Kit, his original reason for visiting Blackthorn Hall long forgotten. 
And he leaves, Livvy trailing behind him, waiting until he is in the safety of his bedroom at the Scholomance to finally let the tears fall.
66 notes · View notes
seriouslysam8 · 1 year
Note
Hi Sam, what type of reviews do you prefer? To be honest I get anxious when leaving reviews because I don’t want it to be too long where I’m rambling or too short where it looks like I don’t appreciate the effort the author put into the chapters. Sometimes I get too excited and I go back and tone it down because I feel like I sound stupid. I’m the type of reader that as I’m reading I’m making bullet notes of what I liked or my reaction throughout the story, favorite lines etc.., and then I go back and expand on it. But then I read what I wrote and it’s almost a page of what sounds like complete gibberish to me so I deleted it and try to sum it up so it’s not as detailed but more to the point I guess… I’m ashamed to admit it but sometimes I don’t review because I think the author is going to think I’m a complete idiot and laugh at me. Sometimes I’ll only write down a few words as my appreciation and hold back the hundred of things I want to say or ask in fear of looking like an idiot.
I appreciate all and any positive reviews.
The only type of review I hate is when someone is critical or bashes my stories. There are a select few people who I allow to edit and preread portions of my stories that I trust to give me that critical feedback. But in reviews, I like to keep it positive and happy and motivating because I do this as a hobby and I don’t get paid. I don’t care if I’m long-winded or you hate x character or my angst is over the top. Click the x and move on. If you genuinely like the story, I’d love to hear about it!
But if you feel up to writing a few words, I’m happy. If you wanna write me an essay, I am REALLY fucking happy. You wanna ramble in a bullet point list, I’m giddy. You will never annoy me with rambling in a review or giving me your unfiltered reaction. Honestly, it’s the best feeling for me and makes writing out these stories worth it for me.
I share these stories because it’s fun to geek out about our favorite couple or character. I love the friends I’ve made through writing. I try to respond to every review (minus the anon ones on ff.net because I can’t? You anon reviewers who ask me question on ff.bet know I can’t respond right because I always feel bad but I legit can’t respond to you) because I like chatting with people about these characters.
And I know not every author feels like that. But I am a rambling mess all of the time and love to chat. So, please, don’t ever be afraid to leave a long review, a short review, whatever. Never edit your review with me. I will never laugh at you but we can share a laugh together about something stupid I wrote or about our lovable little vegetable patch. Don’t be afraid to send me asks with questions or whatnot. Don’t be afraid to send me a private message. I don’t care.
I get the anxiety. I’m a terrible reviewer. I never know what to say so I always leave short reviews. I’m socially awkward so I’m always afraid what people will think of my reviews because I know there are a lot of authors out there who feel the way I do about interactions, but I know there are a select few who don’t feel the way I do. So it’s always nerve wracking. I get it. But with me, you’re safe. Let’s ramble and have fun together, okay??? This is supposed to be a fun space. I’m fun. I think???
Please, put a name on your reviews even if you want to be anonymous. It’s way more fun to see the same names over and over again because then I feel like I start to get to know you through reviews and it’s just fucking fun. Like every week, I wait for the same names to pop up in my mailbox and smile when I get their review. Or I’ll be like “Ugh, So-And-So hasn’t read yet and I’m anxious what they will saaaaaaay!!” Like I get excited for the every chapter reviewers.
22 notes · View notes
beaujolais-oh-fuck · 19 days
Text
Summary of this long-ass post: If u wanna join my Freerice Group, the joining code is: 2ZJPCWMH and anyone & everyone is welcome to join!
This is probably incredibly sick and f*cked-up of me and like a very vile part of my ED-brain, but one way I try to assuage the intense guilt I feel from restricting/fasting (seemingly) by choice, while there are devastating & unspeakably horrific hunger & starvation crises occurring throughout the world, is by spending my free time doing those "click-to-help" donation site thingies to fund aid and food donations to starving populations (the two I use most are Arab.org in their Click-To-Help section https://arab.org/click-to-help/palestine/ and The Hunger Site (although I have read some very sus things about them on reddit??? I only really resort to this one bc my middle school health teacher had us do this one every day for a week, so I implicitly trusted her judgment for years bc she was known for having 6 prior mar!juana possessions on her record).
Anyways, the other thing I do daily is I play the Freerice game (you can find it on the World Food Programme Website). It's a free trivia game where as you play, you generate donations (the site was previously were funded purely by ads, but recently they were able to acquire several large sponsors to cover the donations instead, since they said it's more consistent and reliable that way) for the World Food Programme, which uses the money to organize and distribute food aid all over the world-- but especially to populations suffering from emergency-level food insecurity and starvation rates (such as in Palestine, South Sudan, Democratic Republic of the Congo, etc-- there's a list on the WFP website of the areas that are under the "Emergencies" section).
p.s. The "grain of rice" in the game don't represent actual real grains of rice, they're just a conceptual representation to help you visualize the worth of your donations adding up.
anyways. So what my mentally ill brain does is: for every "bowl of rice" (a certain donation amount) I do on Freerice, my ED-ass thinks, "Oh good, for every 'bowl' I 'fill' it's literally keeping me distracted from binge-eating and INSTEAD, all the food I COULD have been eating in that time I was playing-- I can use that distraction from eating to generate legit food donations for real starving people who actually WANT to eat and desperately NEED the nutrition. As far as coping-mechanisms go, this one isn't so bad!"
That's how my brain-fogged, guilt-ridden mind works. I'm so ashamed of choosing to deny myself food, when I know for a fact that there's stuff going on in the world like the Israeli government using forced-starvation as a tool to commit genocide against Palestinians by creating and maintaining a man-made famine. So i try to mentally justify my ED behavior by imagining that the time i spend not-eating while playing Freerice is a way of somehow magically transferring my ~potential food ingestion~ to another person somewhere else who ACTUALLY needs it.
ANYWAYS, my point to all this rambling is that I wanted to offer my Freerice Group Code to anyone on EDblr (or just anyone in general) who might want to join my Group and collectively track the donations we generate together :')
My Freerice Group name is "Rat Terrier Devotees" (bc I have a Teddy Roosevelt Terrier lol) and the Group Code is: 2ZJPCWMH Please feel free to join (regardless if you're EDblr or not, obvi)!
2 notes · View notes
orcelito · 9 months
Note
I'm interested in Trigun after seeing your posts/reblogs and I'm wondering: what is the best way to consume such media and where could a person go about finding it? 🥰
oh FUCK yea
TLDR answer: trigun 98 -> badlands rumble -> trigun manga -> trigun stampede. going into why below. (under readmore bc this accidentally got long. again.)
ok well. common consensus is to watch the original anime (referred to as trigun 98 by much of the fandom) bc it has a slower start & lets you get to know the characters a lot more than the new anime (assisted by the 26 episodes length, as opposed to 12). it preserves the Mystery of what Vash's deal is for much longer, & is in general pretty entertaining to watch if you don't know wtf is going on. it's Legally on uh. crunchyroll? i think? tho i watched it here: https://aniwatch.to/trigun-266. just like. normal sketchy site safety, adblock is ur best friend, don't click on things. etc. if this site doesnt work for u then u could always google another.
there's a movie, Badlands Rumble, which is based off the trigun 98 canon, so probably a good place to watch it is right after that. just uh. be mindful that Vash's behavior is a Lil... obnoxious at points lol. but it's still a fun movie overall with plenty of good shit in it, so it's worth watching still. i watched it w/ a friend streaming it so i dont have a link onhand, but u could probs find it thru that same site if u search for it.
NEXT UP is my personal favorite, the manga. theres trigun original and trigun maximum, which is the direct continuation of the original (there was an issue with the publishers and licensing so upon continuing the manga w/ a different publisher, Nightow had to rebrand it. it's otherwise the same manga). i recommend this one next bc it's the most whole of story & goes deeper into things than the original anime, but it's also what the new anime is based on (aka why i recommend this one first). it can get FUCKED UP (they all can really, but trimax Especially) so probably look up a triggers list if u think u might need it. it's SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO fucking good tho. genuinely owns my soul. i was a different person after reading it (not rly better or worse, mostly just more insane). there r a few translations online - an old fan translation (DO NOT TOUCH, full of horrid translations and insertions of bigotry that arent in the original), the official Dark Horse translation (an... ok translation, though it has plenty of errors and confusing translations. it's what i first read so it's Okay, but not the best), AND the trigun manga Overhaul project, which u can find on tumblr. this one's the best one bc it's lovingly translated and a LOT more accurately done. i swear things that were so confusing at first are So Clear reading this one. u can find the masterpost Here: https://trigun-manga-overhaul.tumblr.com/post/701392615591034880/trigun-ultimate-overhaul-masterpost-heres-all-the. or just go to their blog @/trigun-manga-overhaul. just trust me on this it's where U wanna read.
an offshoot of it (and what ive been reading today) is an anthology sort of manga, Trigun Multiple Bullets, which is also in that post. it was released as part of the BLR movie release, & the first part is kinda After It? but overall it's just a standalone piece with some side stories. where is this in the manga canon timeline? Who Fuckin Knows. just read it and have fun lol
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST is the most recent anime, Trigun Stampede. this is a CGI remake that aired at the start of this year & caused the trigun renaissance. now a lot of people have a knee-jerk negative reaction to hearing it's CGI, but trust me, this is basically THE BEST application of CGI in anime i've ever really seen. absolutely beautiful. fucking gorgeous. plus with really cool action sequences, and OF COURSE the music is literally one of my favorite anime soundtracks Ever. it's gotten critiques for its pacing, which can be pretty rushed, but they were trying to fit a lot more story in a lot less episodes than the original anime (again, it only has 12 episodes), so keep that in mind. it's not a remake in the traditional sense of redoing the exact same story, so there are changes in the timeline and characters from what's in the original anime or even the manga. one of the biggest things people were unhappy about is the absence of a main character, Milly, who is seemingly replaced by a random man that's not in the other versions, Roberto. Milly will be in season 2 though, as was revealed with the final episode. all in all, it's Kind Of a prequel, though also a remix/reimagining based largely off of the manga's canon over trigun 98. so long as you go into it not expecting it to be Just Like the other versions, it's a really wonderful story in and of itself. it's available on Crunchyroll, which you SHOULD watch there if u have it bc that would give them more money for a season 2 (which is in development). if ur like me tho n dont wanna pay for crunchyroll (it's Specifically a premium-only anime :p), u can watch it where i watched, aka here: https://aniwatch.to/trigun-stampede-18281.
all in all, each version has its strengths and weaknesses, but i've found the best way to go about enjoying All of them is to treat them as their own things. it can be fun to compare them, especially when it comes to things made Different plot or character-wise, but they are separate things. a lot of people who hate one or the other r coming from the angle of expecting one to be just like the other, & are then disappointed (trigun 98 being a Lot sillier at first than trigun stampede, which is a lot more serious sci-fi western in tone).
And Overall. i love them all. so i hope you do too!
5 notes · View notes
pa1ntsta1n · 2 years
Text
Double date?
Part 1 of the idea i had in my head lol.
Unedited and probably doesnt make sense,
Have fun reading! Ill prob delete it in a few anyways lol,
Ever since last night, Levi’s day has been shit. He’s realised he lost his key’s, he’s out of food so he cant go out and buy some instead of order junk food, he’s even more sleep deprived than usual because he had to pick his lock to get in, AND he stubbed his toe while searching his apartment.
After repeatedly checking his apartment (a total of 10 times in the past 2 hours) he ultimately gave up. instead reaching for his phone to text his mother,
Messages
——————————————————————————
Levi
Hey mom, can i borrow your spare keys for my apartment?, i need to get another copy.
Kuchel
Of course! What happened to your original pair?
Levi
I dont know, i lost them yesterday
Kuchel
Alright, im still at work right now, ill text you when im home.
Or you do you want kenny to bring the keys to you?,
Levi
No thanks, id rather not trust him with a car.
Bye mom, love you.
Kuchel
Love you too! ❤️❤️
Releasing a sigh of relief, he paused before he closed his phone to take a shower. As if on cue he was attacked with a frenzy of texts from no other, than hanji themself.
Messages
Hanji
(IMAGINE A TIKTOK URL THINGY)
LEVII LEVI
LEVIII
HEYY
LEVII REPLYU
ITS UU
AND THE PRETTY PERSON IS THERE
OMGGG
LEVIIII
Erwin
Hanji??
Are you alright??
Hanji
ERWINN
ITS A TIKTOK OF THE PRETTY PERSON LEVI SAW
ONGGG
ITS HIS CHANCE
THIS COULD BE A LOVE STORYYY
OMGG LEVIII
Erwin
You mean them??
The person levi could NOT take his eyes off??
Hanji
YESS THEM
THE ONE WITH THE PINK CAT CARRIER
IYS THEMMM WATCH IT ERWINNN
WE’RE WATCHING A LOVE STORY IN THE MAKING AHHDJDJDHJDJDKSJJD
LEVKDJSKDJ
LWVIIDJDKDK
SNSWERR RNN
YJU CANG LEQVD THEM HANGINHHHHDJD
Levi
stfu four eyes.
my phone’s about to explode thanks to you
Hanji
JUST OPEN TJE GKDDAMN TIKTOKKK
ITS NOY A RICKROLL TRUST NEE
PLEASEE
IF H DONT U’LK REGRET ITT
Levi
No im not watching a random tiktok u sent me.
Last time i open one i was traumatised after.
Erwin
Its worth it Levi. They found your keys.
And with that single thought in mind he clicked the link. Ignoring the thundering notifications all stemming from the groupchat, he continued to watch.
A familiar head of hair filled his view, as the text-to-speech voice started, “to the hot guy in all black at Rose Clinical Vet, 1st of march, at 9am, with the adorable calico cat,
I think our cats fell in love<3.
And i found your keys!”.
Indeed it was them(aka you😍😍✋), the same person who was at the vet when levi left, and the one who walked out of the groomer’s across the street.
FLASHBACK?
Eagerly waiting for the vet to call him into the room, his cat anxiously wriggling around in her carrier, in attempts to calm her down, he mutters “shht, ur fine, ur okay. This wont be long, trust me i dont wanna be here either.”
Turning his attention now to his phone, he pulls his keys out to give to Pip, his cat.
(Kuchel thought he was lonely so she got him a kitten 2 years before. Pip was the runt and a stray so according to Kenny, it was the perfect match, so he started calling the kitten Pipsqueak, then it just stuck.)
His reassuring words dont work on poor Pip though, not until the entry bell rang and Pip went silent. The two cats did indeed fall in love, the cream maine coon maintaining eye contact with the younger calico.
Levi completely oblivious and glad his cat stopped complaining just mindlessly went on with his morning.
This was until his name was called to bring Pip into the doctor’s office and he caught the sight of them.
21 notes · View notes
princessmia-tarot · 7 months
Note
Hello! how are you? sorry to disturb you.
If you have time can I have a Free reading from you? I don't have enough money to pay for paid readings🥲.
" Why my parents are toxic?"
I just wanna know, I don't really trust them anymore because being Gaslighted, manipulated to the point that I make the decision to not talk to them.
It's kinda sad though instead breaking them breaking the generational trauma that they had from their families they do that to us siblings.
Thank you very much. I hope I don't bother you at this day thank you very much 😊.
Hello! You're not bothering me at all, and I'm here to help. Let's explore your question about why your parents may exhibit toxic behavior using the symbolism of the Hermit card.
The Hermit is a card associated with introspection, solitude, and seeking inner wisdom. In the context of your situation, it suggests that your parents' toxic behavior may be rooted in their own inner struggles and unresolved issues. They may not have taken the time or effort to engage in deep self-reflection or healing.
Gaslighting, manipulation, and perpetuating generational trauma can sometimes be a result of individuals not addressing their own emotional wounds and repeating harmful patterns learned from their own upbringing. The Hermit card indicates that your parents might not have fully confronted or healed from their past experiences and pain.
It's essential to remember that their behavior is not a reflection of your worth or value. It's a reflection of their own struggles and limitations. While understanding the reasons behind their actions can provide some clarity, it's equally important to prioritize your well-being and emotional health.
Choosing to distance yourself from toxic relationships is a courageous step toward protecting your own mental and emotional health. It's a form of self-care and self-preservation, and it's okay to prioritize your own happiness and peace.
If you decide to engage with them in the future, consider setting healthy boundaries and seeking professional guidance if needed to navigate these complex dynamics. Remember that you have the power to break the cycle of generational trauma and create a healthier and more positive path for yourself and future generations. 💕🌟
xx
Mia💗
- - - - - - - - - 
★ To see status of free readings click here
★ CHECK OUT MY NEW SHOP SECTION: PRESET QUESTIONS - FUN THEMES
★ LOVE how much information is in these free readings? Check out my ETSY to get even more information, clarification and messages. USE CODE TUMBLR20 FOR 20% OFF 
★ Interested in spells and chakras? Check out my spells on offer 
★ If you feel called, please follow and share my blog and/or Etsy so more people have the opportunity for guidance ❤️
1 note · View note
abbaswift · 10 months
Note
if this is too personal you dont have to answer this but ive seen you talk about autism on your blog before. I really am convinced that i have autism, like now ive looked into it i feel like its the missing jigsaw piece that explains so much. I really identify with stories from females in their early 20s as well about having undiagnosed autism throughout their school years. im in the uk but im scared that i wont be believed, i have no idea how to go about it and i dont even know how to bring it up to my parents. Do you have any advice?
hi anon, i’m feeling weirdly honoured that you’ve come to me to talk about this, i probably don’t have much advice but i can definitely relate to a lot of things you’ve mentioned
okay firstly i made a post about this recently which might have been the post that prompted this ask but i’ll link it just in case
the day autism was mentioned to me (i remember it vividly, i was eleven) everything just clicked (not to sound too cliche). i knew nothing about it but by the end of the day i’d done so much googling and SO much seemed to fit. it’s wild how you can spend years not knowing why you are the way you are and then you can find out and everything makes more sense. i actually feel a lot more confident and less “weird” now that i don’t have to make up justifications for my own behaviours to myself
i was lucky (in a fashion?) that i was diagnosed at fourteen but i know that there are so many people from our generation and older who slipped through the cracks when it came to childhood diagnosis simply because they were assigned female at birth. for decades autism was seen more as a “boy thing” and it’s only, i’d say, in the last decade or two that autistic girls are being more acknowledged. even now the boy:girl ratio for autism diagnosis is something like 4:1 and there are scientific disputes about whether it’s because autism in males is really more common, if “girl autism” is different or if girls are simply conditioned to hide their traits or show them in a different way. because of this, it’s very possible that there are many undiagnosed young women in your exact situation. it might be helpful to look for online communities (i was going to say forums but are they really a thing now?) of people you can relate to, who are going through the same thing
to be honest, i never had to convince anyone i was autistic because it wasn’t me who thought i was autistic in the first place, it was my deputy head teacher in middle school who first mentioned it in a school meeting to my mum, nan and other teachers. i didn’t even tell my friends until i was officially diagnosed. this means i don’t have much experience in what you need advice with. of course, i have no idea what your relationship with your parents is like or if they’re open-minded or knowledgeable about neurodiversity, so you’ll ultimately need to be the judge of how to approach it. maybe it’ll work best to sit them down and make sure they’re paying attention, but that’s a lot of pressure. honestly when i wanna start a tricky conversation, i do it when the people aren’t looking at me, maybe when we’re in the car or watching tv. just try to casually bring the topic up, maybe reference a recent news story about autism, i don’t know. just ease into the conversation(s) and once you feel ready, you might just blurt out what you want to say. if you feel like people will need persuading, write out a list of your autistic traits for reference. like i said in my linked post, some people don’t know about neurodiversity, but they will often still notice if you don’t act how neurotypical people do. if you’re reading out these autistic traits, traits that you also have, they may be more inclined to connect autism with you, and they’ll know you’ve done research.
i know you’ve mentioned that you worry you won’t be believed, but it might be worth confiding in some trusted friends or other relatives before you tell your parents, even if you just frame it in a hypothetical way. that way you can get a consensus on whether you “seem autistic” or not (and maybe get some confidence) before you have the (probably?) more important talk with your parents. although i suppose, if the people you’ve asked disagree with you, it might discourage you in further exploring the possibility of you being autistic. that being said, you know your brain and how much you potentially mask more than anyone else, so if you ask for the opinions of others, don’t be disheartened if it’s not the consensus you expected.
i was gonna try to type something about actually getting diagnosed but you might not be ready for that unless you’re prepared to get diagnosed without anyone in your life knowing. i don’t have much to offer in terms of experience (because i simply don’t remember much of getting diagnosed) or advice but i’d be willing to support you through it. for now, all i can say about getting an autistic diagnosis on the nhs is… good luck charlie
okay sorry for the massive ramble, it’s the ortizzum. i hoped this gave you or someone else reading this even a smidge of help, assuming you didn’t fall asleep midway through. as i said, i’m not great with advice but i can definitely relate as a young woman who wasn’t properly supported because of a lack of diagnosis. feel free to send me another ask or dm me about anything autism related… or just anything full stop. okay i’m wishing you luck, keep me updated! MWAH! x
1 note · View note
berryunho · 2 years
Note
I READ YOUR RESPONSE ONLY TO GET RUN OVER BY A TRAIN NAMED CHAPTER 20 LIKECUHYBRVFNYN YOU DIDNT EVEN GIVE ME A C H A N C E 💀💀💀 I WAS IN PUBLIC AND DIDNT HAVE A CHARGER AND MY PHON WAS AT 10% BUT YOLO
FIRST OF ALL an honorable screw you Hongjoong 💖 AND THEN WE START OFF WITH SOME “FLUFF”?? did make my heart do a little dugun dugun 😳 but godddd when it gets to the Mingi convo A R G H
My reactions during the whole convo: FINALLY ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ -> :0 -> :( -> :0000 -> D:
LIKE DAMN OK SO MUCH HAPPENED AT ONCE RHFHGJ LIKE NAURRR MINGI I WANNA TRUST YOU BUT I KEEP SIDEYEING YOU AND NOW I FEEL BAD BUT AT THE SAME TIME ITS SO HARD TO TRUST HIM 😭😭 AND SAME THING GOES FOR SAN EXCEPT SAN IS STILL WAY MORE SUS EVEN IF HES CUTE, WE HAVE TO STAY STRONG MISS Y/N
Although I completely agree with y/n not reading ‘The Answer’, you gotta know what the prophecy or whatever tf is cause like WHAT IF YOURE ABT TO GET SACRIFICED I’MMMMMM either get San to tell you the prophecy so you don’t have to read it or ask San for the page numbers and skip to that part and read it real quick in private like in the bathroom or smth 💀
But like always I ate this chapter up and I can’t wait to see what happens in the future! Ofc there’s no pressure in uploading and I’d wait forever as long as you’re proud of your work before you upload a chapter and thank you for all your hard work going into this series 🥺💖
- ily muah muah, 🍓 anon 🥰
ehehehe all apart of my master plan of course ! very bold to read ff in public (idk about you but i cannot control my facial expressions when reading lol) though i salute your bravery and dedication hehe !!! aaaaahhhh honestly this ask makes all of the laboring i was doing over the chapter worth it hehe like idk why i was struggling so bad bc. like. every scene was something that i really wanted to write (i have had that mingi scene written for like ... 3 months maybe LOL) but getting everything to click into a cohesive update was very difficult and i still think it was a bit choppy at parts but AHHHHHH im so happy that you liked it and i love and appreciate your input very much and ... yeah hehehe tysm i hope your week has started nicely!! <3
0 notes
tsumtsumsthighs · 2 years
Note
May I get some soft requests with dazai and his s/o?💕
hi nonnie!! you absolutely can ask for that omg. i've been having severe dazai brainrot lately, i wanna hold him and give him a smooch 🥺
pairing: dazai x gn!reader
word count: 520
Tumblr media
Dazai is, to most, an enigma. 
His true feelings and motivations stay locked in a safe, so much so that even he forgets who he really is at times. Those who tried breaking open the safe were laughably unsuccessful. There have been those he tricked into thinking they really knew him, only to be left alone in the dark. 
But you didn’t try, you didn’t judge, you trusted him. An unwavering trust Dazai had only ever felt from one other person in his life. It took time, and patience, but eventually Dazai simply handed you the key. He allowed you to finally look inside that infinitely brilliant and broken mind of his. 
You place your mug of tea on the ring-stained coffee table before taking a seat amongst the cushions on the couch. You pull out your phone, deciding to indulge in a while of mindless scrolling. You rhythmically swipe and and sip your tea, late afternoon sunbeams lighting up the room. 
A while passes, the sun almost entirely disappearing over the horizon, when the front door clicks open. You smile softly as Dazai wanders in, kicking off his shoes and shrugging off his coat. He greets you with a tired grin, “I’ve missed you today darling.”
You scoot up to give him room to sit beside you, “Looks like you had a rough day, wanna talk about it?” 
He shakes his head, “Not particularly, no.” He glances down at you, a playful glint in his eyes, “But I know what I do want.”
Before you can ask, Dazai unceremoniously flops down on top of you, making you screech. You want to scold him for scaring you, but his gleeful laughter stops you. He buries his face against your neck, leaving a soft kiss against your skin. You weave your fingers through his hair and tug softly, fingertips softly rubbing into his scalp. He lets out a long, slow breath, his body fully relaxing against yours. 
“You’re far too good for me.” He mumbles.
“Don’t talk like that, Osamu.” you flick his ear softly.
He gasps loudly, “I never thought my dear beloved would resort to physical abuse! I take it back, you're terrible.”
You chuckle and roll your eyes, “Says the one who pinned me down and tickled me for five minutes until I nearly peed myself.”
Dazai starts laughing again, almost obnoxiously loud. In fact, you’re almost sure if anyone else heard him they would think he is obnoxious. But to you, his laughter, his smile, his jokes, and even his dramatics are worth the world. You’ll never understand why he chose you, why he handed you the precious key, but you’ll always be grateful that he did.
“Hey Osamu?”
To most, Osamu Dazai is an enigma. The man is notoriously hard to read, one can never know what he’s thinking.
“What is it darling?”
Even so, one look into his tired brown eyes and you know; you can hear his thoughts loud and clear.
“I love you.”
But you can’t deny, it feels indescribably wonderful when you get to hear him say it.
“I love you more.”
452 notes · View notes
emptycoffinnail · 2 years
Text
GEORGENOTFOUND X READER
Context: In a perfect world where cc! DreamTeam and reader live together. Quackity, Karl, Punz and others don’t live too far away. GeorgeNotFound x content creator!reader ~ angst mostly. Slight fluff. Friends to lovers?
Tumblr media
Honestly inspired by the show Euphoria. My first DSMP fic/imagine. Feed back appreciated.!!
Warnings: cursing, mentions of depression, anxiety and substance abuse
Please do not read if you are not comfortable with these topics. You are never alone. Please reach out to anyone, myself included. There are resources to help.
~~~~~~Reader POV~~~~~~
Being a streamer has been really draining lately. There’s not been too many new games to play. The same old ones have not been too fun to play as I’ve spent the past few years playing them ,but being with friends and chat is always worth it.
Today I streamed for about 5 hours before tapping out. My brain got tired and slow. Maybe all I need is to rest?
Resting on my bed, with the door open, I have the urge to want to simultaneously curl into a ball under my sheets and feel like I wanna jump out the window.
Laying here, I play some background noise. I’m not even sure what it is. It just something to stop me from being alone with my thoughts. Anytime I let myself think more than five minutes my anxiety spikes. I guess why I like streaming there’s always someone there. At all time, anywhere. But even now that feels like too much.
I think the boys are busy. I’m not sure. The longer I lay here the less motivation I feel.
Now I’m not as big as the DreamTeam . I really only became part of the group way later than everyone else. Meeting Dream and the connections I’ve made have been something I would never have imagined. But the moment we clicked online, I knew we were something special. Not too long after that everyone was moving towards each-other, I joined in too. I get loads of hate for seemingly clinging onto the boys clout,but no one would understand that I would kill for these guys. They are my family now and that’s something the internet can’t take away from me.
Now from the viewer point of view. It can really seem like I’m the odd one out. That I don’t deserve this opportunity and I’m not as talented as thousands of others online. And trust me, I understand that. In times like these more than ever. I just feel really low.
Turning my head to my side, looking at my night stand. There is someone or thing that has always been great during times like these. Their name is OXI. Now I don’t think I have a drug problem. It’s just that often times where I’m feeling low, these friends have really lifted me. Yeah I’ve got it under control. More importantly its very low key and I’m 80% sure no one knows. I say because I’m sure Dream and Sap don’t but one very observant Gogy………walks into my room right after I slip two pills into my mouth.
“Hey, how’s it going” smooth British motherfucker.
I try to close my night side table smoothly but quick enough that he doesn’t see exactly what it is.
“Hey gogs, um just ended stream and got a headache so just took some Tylenol”
I’m trying my best to act normal but as the pills start to work, and the numbness begins I can’t help but to overthink that he will know. But he won’t. Please don’t.
“Yeah I was watching a bit actually. Great stream from what I saw.” He scratches the back of his neck, making eye contact with my night side table then me.
I smile slightly, sitting up in my bed now.
“You got any plans to stream?”
The pills feel great now. Exactly the way I need to be. Except the overwhelming guilt and fear and paranoia and everything else…
“Not exactly, I never really plan to…like have plan, ya know”
A small smile takes my face now, I’m ready to lay down, listen to music and maybe just maybe…
“You alright?“ George asks.
I blink back into it. I guess I spaced out for too long.
“No yeah no. Of course, sorry was just thinking about something. I….Um…yeah sorry”
“Don’t apologize, you haven’t done anything wrong have you?”
“Yeah your right, any plans for right now gogs?”
I smile as I lay back down. Heavy eyes,slow my blink down, comfort taking over me. He smiles slightly back.
“No plans. Might get some food. Are you hungry?” He pulls out his phone. I assume to pull up Ubereats or something.
“I can eat.”
The overwhelming urge to need more comfort comes suddenly. I need someone.
“Gogy?” I ask. Extending my hand from my bed towards him standing in the doorway.
“Yess” He extends the s, still looking down at his phone.
“Can you come lay with me just for a minute?”
I feel like I can cry, like the numbness is taking over, the thinking won’t stop. I asked one question but I feel like I’m pleading him. He looks up and puts his phone on my table. I guess he sees the desperation in my eyes because George is not a physical person. He doesn’t like to cuddle, or even hug longer than necessary, but I think he knows.
“Um I’m not really…I guess just for a little bit”
“Thank you” I say very quietly. Almost embarrassed.
He shuffles slowly towards me. I move over in the bed making room for him to lay directly on my left. I’m staring at the ceiling, glancing at him trying to get comfortable on my bed. We’ve never really cuddled unless you count those times Sapnap just smushes all of us together on the couch as “roommate bonding time”. But I think he knows that I need him right now. We move in a way that feels really nice for me. George is so small usually I would consider him the small spoon, but I choose this time to lay my head on his chest and almost wrap my arm around him.
“This is nice. Thanks.”
I say with a frown. I really feel like I can cry right now. Like if I let one tear out, the dam will definitely burst. I feel like he tilts his head down to try to catch a glimpse at my face. I just bury my face into his chest. He rests his chin on my head. He sighs.
“Can you stay just a bit? Till I fall asleep?” I ask quietly.
“Yeah, that’s fine. You know, I’m always here for you. You know that right?”
I take a deep breath, curl slightly more into a ball.
“Yeah. I know” I pull away for a second. Lifting my head to look at him, I try to give him the best smile I can right now.
He looks concerned, but he’s good at covering it. He looks into my eyes, when his hands move close to my face. I don’t even notice I started crying when he wipes a tear away. It scares me to be honest. I lay my head down once more.
“You know. If you have any troubles. We can help you. Not just Dream or Sapnap, but with whatever you’re struggling with. I can help with the best of my ability, no judgement.”
If I wasn’t crying already. I would’ve cried now. I just wanna say that I’m okay. To fall asleep and wake up tomorrow with another start to the day.
I nod instead. He takes a deep breath.
“And I just….um it’s just that I really care about you. A lot. Okay?”
I lift my head again, to look at him in the face. He looks deep into my eyes. No doubt he sees how high I am. How much pain is there. I just wanna explain but I’m tired. I just wanna say anything but it won’t come out. Instead I just, lean forward and kiss him.
It’s a light kiss. More than a peck but not anything too deep. Like I’m testing him. I’m sure he’s surprised. I want to leave room for him to totally reject this.
I don’t get that. He rests his hand on my cheek. He’s kissing me back. I pull away first, opening my eyes slowly. He speaks first.
“Did you mean that or was it…?” He’s hinting towards the pills.
My voice breaks. “I meant it. Fuck I’m sorry. I should’ve..I meant to ask.. or say something.” I feel embarrassed now. I put my face in my hand.
“No I’ve been meaning to do that to. It’s just that. We’ve -the guys and I -have known you’ve been struggling and we don’t wanna pry too much.”
I peek up from my hand. Kind of amazed.
“Oh I didn’t know you guys really saw that. Or that you wanted to kiss me too. Sorry. “ I would’ve been more responsive if it hadn’t have been for the pills.
“Don’t apologize. We care about you. I admit, I’ve noticed first but we just want you to be okay and comfortable with us.” He says softly. Testing my reaction.
“I trust you guys more than I trust myself.” A small chuckle leaves my mouth.
“Once you sleep this off. Maybe we can discuss it?“ He hesitated to ask.
“Yeah I think we have quite bit to discuss.”
I’m not sure if I mean it 100%, but I definitely wanna start the conversation about my struggles, about kissing him, and about being better. I snuggle back into his chest and he kisses the top of my head. Unspoken words said, but for one time in a long time. I feel okay as I drift to sleep.
135 notes · View notes
therealpussybangs · 3 years
Text
When you figure out they cheated pt. 1
A/n: Tw- ANGSTY ANGST ANGST, swearing, yelling, crying, fighting, cheating
Tooru Oikawa 
You had just gotten home from a week long trip with your best friends, and all you wanted to do was cuddle up with your gorgeous boyfriend. He had just hopped out of the shower and was changing when he asked you to grab him his phone from off the dresser. But when you picked it up, there were three missed messages and one missed call from a number you didn’t recognize. You asked Tooru if you could read them, and he of course said yes. 
“Hey I had a lot of fun last night!”
“Wanna meet up again sometime??”
“I really enjoyed myself, “Mr. Bedbreaker””
Your eyes fill with tears as you continue reading, and as you get down to the last notification, you see a voicemail. You were about to click on it when your soon to be ex-boyfriend walks out of the closet.                                                   “Babe? Why are you crying?!” he asks, full of concern and worry. But he doesn’t have time to pull you into his arms because you are already brushing passed him into the closet. Oikawa reaches down to grab his phone when he sees the open notifications.                                                                                  “Shit...” How could he have been so careless...He wanted nothing more than to hear your distant sobs stop, to cradle you and tell you it meant nothing..but he was frozen. Frozen by fear. Frozen by self-hatred. Self-hatred for hurting you, and self-hatred for the fact that he too...enjoyed last night’s activities. 
Oikawa was feeling rather lonely and wanted to go out for a bit before you got home. So he decided he wanted to go to the bar. Bad idea. He ended up in some gorgeous girl’s bed the next morning, instead of waiting patiently for you to come home. He at first thought you would never know and life would go on, but as the hours past after he left the woman’s house, the guilt started to pool at the bottom of his stomach, making him feel sick.
He slowly padded into the closet where you sat crying, packing your things.       “Baby please don’t leave...please i beg you,,we can work past this I can-” You cut him off mid-sentence, already having enough of his pleas.                            “You did this you yourself Oikawa, you can’t do anything now. We’re over, I’ll have my brother come and grab the rest of my shit tomorrow.” Sobs wrack his body as regret swims in his desperate eyes. “Please don’t call me that- i’m your Tooru, your baby, your lovebug! A-and don’t say that either, we can move past this talk through it! it meant nothing I- I love you and you only.!!” He started grabbing onto your shoulders almost more to keep him steady on his feet rather than him trying to get you to stay. You shrug him off however, and walk away only stopping at the door. “Please don’t contact me again, I don’t ever want to see you again.” He rushes to your side and says “baby...please anything just stay...I love you so much”                                                                “Then why...why’d you do it...was I not enough?? Was I not pretty enough..not skinny enough..?” He looks at you with stress written on his face, and as he looks into your broken eyes, he knows exactly what he’s losing, and he hates it. “No baby...god no, you’re perfect, beautiful, it was a mistake!” You shake your head and walk out the door, before you close it you say “ 
That was the last thing you ever said to him. And that was the last time he ever saw you...until about 6 years later when he saw you holding the hand of an infant, and wiping the ice cream off the child’s face. He was going to walk over there and explain how much he’s changed, until he saw a handsome man walk up to you, kiss your temple and pick up his daughter. Your daughter. 
It’s funny how quickly someone’s life can change, the unfunny part is the way in which it changes.
Suna Rintaro
Suna had just gotten back from an extra long day at work, and you know something was up the moment he came through the door. He was so far gone, drunk, high, all things bad. You wanted to ask what was up but when you went in for a hug another girl came through the door.                                                  
 “Babe, whose this girl in your house..?” She slurred her words, unable to even keep herself up straight. That’s when you realized he wasn’t drunk, or high at all, the smell was coming from that awful woman. You’d almost wanted him to be wasted. Then he wouldn’t have that horrified look on his face. A face of regret, horror, and he looked like he was going to be sick. The girl turned around and asked you “So, who are you, bitch?” 
You lost it. You broke down, crying, glaring at Suna, slowly backing away from him. “Baby, please I-” You just shook your head and walked into your room, sobbing. He explained to the woman standing at the door that you were in fact, his fiance. She widened her eyes and started screaming at him. Little did he know, you were already packing your things. When Suna walks into the closet, he panics. “Baby please don’t leave I can explain I’m so sorry I love you so much-” You shake your head and look down. “Was I not good enough....”
He just wants to hug you. Tell you it’s going to be alright. That he loves you so much, but to his horror, you flinch away. You start sobbing and screaming about how he brought another woman into your shared home. He starts crying and hiccuping, apologies and “She meant nothing!”’s stringing out of him. You eventually finish packing, and he grabs onto you. “PLEASE DON’T LEAVE I LOVE YOU I’M SO SORRY” he screams, trying to keep you there. He needed you. 
He needed your good morning kisses, the goodnight cuddles, the ‘I love you’s”, the delicious meals you cook and the encouragement you gave. You were walking towards the front door and you said, “the damage is done Suna, I trusted you and you brought another woman home, I’m sorry I loved you, and I’m sorry I wasted my time building a relationship with you.’ his eyes shot wide open and he knew, he was done for, and he didn’t have anything to do about it.
What happened to being your “Rinnie” “Rin” or “Taro”?? He always loved those nicknames you gave him even tho he always said they were stupid. “Please baby...” His voice was so quiet and scared you almost gave into the urge to kiss him on the forehead and hug him and tell him it’s okay. But you didn’t. You left and told him you never wanted him to contact you again. “I’m sorry Suna, goodbye” you said, the both of you crying now, him in worse shape than you.
You trusted him.
You loved him
But that’s okay, because it’s been 5 years, so it’s all past-tense.You Trusted, loved him. All in the past. You love someone else now, and you deserve that persons’s love just as much as they deserve yours. You learned your worth, and you learned that you deserve happiness. 
And now you’re okay.
767 notes · View notes
lovesick-panmess · 3 years
Text
Protect Them
Soo I know I'm way overdue with the 3rd part of my Armageddon AU but I've actually been replaying the lessons so I get a proper feel for what I'm writing, so to make up for it and to get this idea out of my head I've been thinking about it for days here is a related fic between the oldest brothers
-------
Levi can count on one hand how many times he's seen Lucifer coming home injured. The Avatar of Pride could easily crush irrelevant demons with his glare and he proved worthy of Diavalo's right-hand man for a reason... But the first time that Levi remembers was on a travel mission with Lord Diavalo within a year after their fall from grace. It was a distant memory, seeing Lucifer stumble up the stairs blooded up and adamantly refusing care from any of them, even Mammon who was following behind his every footstep. He had gotten used to such behavior and just settled for turning up his headphones on his way to the safe haven that was his room, stopping when he noticed the eldest's door cracked open. He watched Mammon gingerly wrap the bandage around his shoulder, blinking back tears in his eyes and shaking his head vehemently as Lucifer spoke. The music was loud and distracting he just settled for reading their lips-
"Mammon I need you to do this for me.."
"I won't! There's no need, ya just paranoid-!"
Watching the tears well up made Levi shift, uncomfortable and jealous, wondering what bond allowed them to be so vulnerable so open. Hadn't they all fought their father together? Rallied behind him so readily behind Lucifer, their Morningstar that only shined a light that only Mammon was allowed to see. He lingered before continuing to walk down the hall, to dwell in his own sunken loneliness but hearing Mammon speak one more time before the door had shut.
"..I'll do it, alright? Just stop ya crying, Luci.."
He had felt the deja vu of that very moment playing out in front of him, though this time he was hiding from Mammon in his secret spot in the living room. They had planned to go to the movies in an hour and Levi knew that Mammon would try to find him to convince him to pay for the tickets yet again so he decided to wait out the time so that scumbag would have to bring his wallet. It was a surprise to see the door open, everyone else is out and Lucifer's return to be scheduled for a few more days, but instead, the eldest had come early with visible wounds and beatings. Levi felt frozen, debating on whether he should slip out to help or stay putt but once again Mammon comes down the stairs like it's his calling. "Lucifer? Let me help you!" Denial was the first given reaction, the eldest's heart too hard and stubborn to ask for help before collapsing into Mammon's arms.
Levi followed with anxiety brewing in his chest, now wanting to just hide away in his room since plans were clearly on hold and he could do nothing to help the pair. Not like they would want his help, a shitty pathetic otaku wasn't much good at bandaging wounds, not like he was able to get much practice like Mammon did. Jealousy seethed, it made his heart race as he hid to the side of the door at the mention of his name.
"We have to tell him, Mams."
"We don't have to tell him shit! It's fine like this...Levi doesn't have to be involved."
It was confusing to be thrown out of the loop, but it hurt to hear Mammon so effortlessly fight to not include him. Maybe the second-born felt that Levi wasn't worth it? Too weak and unable to do..whatever it is they are arguing about, even so, it was odd-looking into Lucifer's room. Mammon unafraid of the eldest's temper and even being so bold as to glare at him while cleaning his cuts, Lucifer had an expression of utter fondness that was intertwined with an unlabeled fear, one that only he seemed to see.
"Mammon, you know it takes a lot out of me to..admit this. I'm almost jealous that you're able to view me so..."
Shit shit shit, he had been so entrapped in their conversation and his own envy he hadn't realized that it was emitting throughout the hall. He stiffens when Lucifer calls his name, slipping out from where he was hiding and now embarrassed. "Levi..come here please." He notes that Mammon refuses to look at him, biting his bottom lip hard as he sits next to his brother, so not used to this soft tone from him. He really must have stepped into a completely different world, one where Lucifer is willing to fight tooth and nail with his own pride in order to tell them the truth. And what a horrid truth it must be.
"Lucifer what's going on? Why is Mammon..." He trails off, feeling Lucifer's hand skim through his hair, and despite his own embarrassment leaned into the comforting touch and suddenly the bottle of Demonus was looking very tempting. "Levi...I would like to involve you in something very important, in order to protect the others." Lucifer's words were slow, each one taking some kind of will to overcome his pride, his wings twitching in what Levi could easily place as anxiety and one he knew way too well. "I'm not allowed to say anything about the threat outside of the Devildom but it puts us at risk and I...There may be a chance I won't come back."
His stomach drops, he doesn't realize that he's shaking until he feels Mammon's arms wrapping around his shoulder, shaking his head in pure denial. Not Lucifer, the most powerful one of them all, their eldest brother not coming back. Such thoughts were unfathomable to even believe, much less considered as a probability to the point that they had to talk about it. Acknowledge it and take action, Lucifer keeps talking and Mammon presses Levi closer to his chest, "I talked this with Mammon since the beginning but now we believe it's time to tell you in case something were ever to happen to the both of us and you would decide when to tell Satan..."
The prospect of such responsibility makes Levi feel like a fish out of water as he gulps for air yet in that same breath go on a rampage of self-deprecation and drowning doubt. How he's not ready, he's a good-for-nothing shitty pathetic otaku, he can't protect his brothers, he's weak, he's nothing, if Lucifer and Mammon are gone then there would be no fucking hope for them. The two oldest look at each other, small bits of regret building up from the pressure and burden they had put on him, Mammon gently rubbing his back and Lucifer cupping his face. "Leviathan please breathe."
His body does it automatically before he can think about it, the air in his lungs felt like boiling water as the panic slowly dissipates in his chest. All that was left was his own soft mutterings, so sure that Lucifer was probably disappointed that he has to trust in Levi of all people to protect them, he leans against Mammon who nudges him affectionately before resting his head on his shoulder. "I...I haven't really done anything good since...I was General...how can you be so sure in me?" He asks but squirms unready for whatever the answer might be, though he's unable to mistake Lucifer's radiating pride that he feels.
"Who's the one who came up with the plan on where to steal the weapons in the Celestial Realm?"
"M-Me but I-"
"And who helped convince the others to lay low while we defended the base?"
"I did but Luci-"
"Who's the one who took an arrow for Mammon while he was trying to protect me?"
"Lucifer-!"
He gets cut off with a flick on his forehead, his lips set in a pout but meeting the Morningstar's expression that made butterflies bloom in his stomach from overwhelming pride had him turn away and looking down at the floor. "Levi, get out of your head for one second and look at how smart and tactical you are. When it matters...when there is no time to panic. You're the third strongest family for a fucking reason, you should start believing it." The unusual confidence makes him flush but it's really Lucifer's words that bring the tears, no longer from fear but slowly coming to the realization that Lucifer and Mammon too had faith in him...they always did.
"Do ya still wanna join the pact? If ya wanna think about it, ya still can Levi." He blinks at the fact that Mammon had really been silent this whole time and just hugging him, the second born now getting up to tighten the remaining bandages. "Did you think about it, Mammon?" Levi knew the answer in his gut, only the blind would question the unwavering devotion that Mammon and Lucifer had for each other, only further cemented as the Avatar of greed simply shakes his head. He feels a small smile form on his face, "Then I don't need to think about it...I want to do this."
By the next few hours, any of the remaining tension and somber feelings had slipped away, replaced by a calm atmosphere that usually would not last long in the House of Lamentation. The melody of the cursed record floated and hung in the air as Levi rested on the floor in his demon form, the pact officially made and learning about the secret doorway by Lucifer's bookcase, definitely locking that information into memory. He sees Mammon grinning above him, curiosity embedded in his features, "So where'd ya decide to put the pact mark?" Levi lifts his sweater, the symbol of the three still glow fresh on the side by his ribs, and Mammon hissing with empathy.
He wanted it to hurt weirdly enough, to serve as a forever reminder that this pain was temporary but the pain of losing his brothers would surely last till the end of time. Mammon shows the mark on his hand, Lucifer clicks his tongue in disapproval as someone might ask about the pact but the second brother waves his concern away. He enjoys looking at the pact, the constant reassurance that they would be okay when the word goes to absolute shit, and Lucifer couldn't find any argument against that. They both look at the eldest who crosses his arms with a sharp, "No-" before puppy eyes come into play and Lucifer's pride can not save him from that.
What they both don't expect is for Lucifer to turn around and spread his wings out as if to show off, but then they see it. The markings trailing up his spine and next to the scars of where his two wings used to be, Levi is the first to reach up and touch it, internally blaming the remnants of Lucifer's pride that is making him so bold. He sees his hand tremble but luckily he is able to hold his voice steady, "Just because we made this pact..doesn't mean you both get to just fuck up. Y-You both should always come home." Lucifer nods, Mammon kisses his cheek and Levi struggles to hide his tears.
When Levithan leaves the room while closing the door behind him, reality, as he knew it just a few hours ago, wasn't all that different and he can hear Asmo drunkenly cheering as Satan carries him through the door. "Hey, Levi! Don't hide in your room- you better come join us." He doesn't give his thoughts a chance, heading down the stairs with a small smile. The world hadn't changed, but Levi would be forever.
----------
AHHH THIS HAS BEEN SITTING THE DRAFTS FOREVER I'M SO GLAD I FINISHED IT. Please please let me know if I should make an explanation post of how the pacts would work (it will most likely be headcanons cause I don't know how they work in canon 😪😪)
either way, I really hope you enjoyed the fic as I did writing it! I'm still working on the next part for the Armageddon AU so bear with me 😭
176 notes · View notes
delicrieux · 3 years
Text
—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER
Tumblr media
extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 
pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao
author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao
ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist
Tumblr media
You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.
A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?
Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.
A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”
mother i crave violence
sensing evil energy rn!!
i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖
^with peace and love shut the fuck up
“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”
You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”
Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.
“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 
rip headphone users
i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears
yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭
To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.
Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 
queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?
Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie
akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.
Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.
There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.
The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.
nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!
^pack it up girl defined
“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”
You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 
“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 
i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 
shes trying give her time
ya dig??? y not capeesh
what scene from the godfather is this lol?
“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.
Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎
You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”
The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.
Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:
I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.
You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.
“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”
NOW she considers it
well....
if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3
Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”
Onto the bio:
You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 
“What the fuck did I just read?”
The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.
The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 
But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.
No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.
“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.
WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????
tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be
^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell
look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling
It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.
What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.
Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.
YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 
...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.
You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.
“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.
“What?” She grits.
“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”
“What did you do now?”
“I made fun of men on Tinder.”
She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”
“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”
“Y/n.”
“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”
She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.
Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.
You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(
my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?
Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 
Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!
You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?
my husband Not jealous.
Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”
He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!
my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.
You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao
my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?
You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs
my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)
Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.
Tumblr media
hope you liked it!! xx
952 notes · View notes