#i also have 0 time left to do anything w this picture so i stopped in the middle I GOTTA JET

[ac3id]

Plaything | 18+

plaything 0/ ?? | part 1

pairings: yandere! bully bakugou katsuki x fem! reader

warnings: [series] blackmail, bullying, dubcon/ noncon, filming w/o consent, yandere themes, no quirks au. ALL CHARACTERS ARE ABOVE 18 YEARS OF AGE.

↪ for chapter 0: dubcon, blackmail, humiliation.

summary: by luck, you get enrolled into u.a high the best school in your town. the only catch is that the school is filled with rich, spoilt, and powerful brats who just seem to hate you, and among them, a certain red-eyed blonde dreads you the most

↪ for chapter 0: you reject bakugou’s proposal to fuck in the dirty boys' washroom so he teaches you a lesson.

— navigation

wordcount. 2k+

a/n: hello !! so this is like a little introduction to my yandere! bully! bakugou series fic. there’s also going to a lot of other bnha character mentions but the main pairing will be w/ baku n reader. enjoy!

“bakugou, i don’t want to do this,” your voice is weak as you bite on your lower lip, trying to stop sinful moans from leaking out of your mouth. bakugo has you bent over the cold and wet sink counter, your chest pressed against the dirty marble while your skirt is flipped over your displaying your bare, perky round ass to his stalking eyes. “who are you calling bakugo?” he spanks your ass with force, making you lose your footing as your head bumps lightly against the mirror.

“sorry, master,” you answer barely above a whisper but it’s loud enough in the empty washroom for him to hear yet he makes you repeat yourself,

“what was that, brat? i couldn’t fucking hear you.” he spanks you again, his heavy hand coming in contact with your soft ass with ferocity sending you flying off your feet.

“i am sorry, master!” you exclaim a little loudly, hoping it would satisfy him. and it does. he scoffs crudely, ghosting his fingers over your pussy lips before dipping his large fingers between them and petting your dry hole. he plays with your cunt, stroking his fingers lovingly over your little pearl, gathering wetness as he slips one finger into your hole. pumping them in and out at a slow pace. he takes his time, building up your orgasm while laughing wickedly as you try to hold in your moans. his fingers inside your cunt increase their pace as your juices start dripping down to your thighs,

“you said you don’t want this?” while his right hand destroys your cunt, his other hand wraps around your small neck. grasping it lightly, making it harder for you to breathe. “why are you dripping everywhere like a slut? hm?”

he had pulled you aside from regular classes, declaring them boring as fuck and that he wanted to do something much better like; fucking you in the boys' washroom. you denied, you told him no. you wanted to attend the lesson and besides skipping with him wouldn’t be any good to you. he was not kind to you, he was a meanie. he still insisted; telling you it’s fine, he knows the material. he can just tutor you later. no harm done, see? see?

if there was anything you hated more than being stuck in the prestigious u.a. high where everyone seemed to be out for your blood was spending time with bakugo katsuki. and being with him alone was another nightmare. he hated you. you didn’t know why, he’d never say why. you just assumed it was because of that one time you accidentally spilled coffee on him or maybe it was just because you breathed. honestly, both seemed favorable in this situation.

after many failed attempts of convincing you to come with him, he gets fed up. he pulls out his phone and shoves it into your face. his screen displays pictures of you which he had taken before and the ones which you had sent him. they are all lewd shots. pictures of you sucking him off while looking into the camera with glassy eyes illuminated the screen and as you swiped right it changed to another with the same background, lighting, and angle but the only difference being that your face was now covered with his seed while you posed for the camera with an innocent smile.

a look deeper into his gallery and you find your nudes which bakugo had forced you to take. it was necessary for you to be naked with your tits and ass being visible, he also wanted to see your face and would never settle for anything else. he never settles for anything without your face in it, makes you take those shots again and again until he’s satisfied with the results. he saves them, all of them. even the ‘bad ones' have been screenshotted and saved onto his phone for his personal use. he never tells what he uses them for but you don’t need to hear it from him. you already know he’s jerking off to each one of them every night before he goes to sleep.

it’s funny, anyone could take a look at those pictures and find out they are not photos exchanged between lovers. your expressions- no matter how hard you try, you always end up looking like you want to cry. there’s fear in your eyes and it just doesn’t feel authentic. it looks forced. like someone had put a gun to your head while you sat and took them. and well, that’s not a far-fetched idea.

he promises these are for his eyes only, “no one else gets to you like this. you are mine.” his words exactly but when his friends also start staring at you with lust-ridden eyes, you can’t help but question his words.

he blackmails you into coming with him. threatening he’d leak those pictures all around the school if you didn’t come with him as if he hadn’t already. as if your compromising photos weren’t already saved in all of your classmates’ phones anyway. bakugo should give himself a pat on the back, he’s such a great actor!

“for someone who doesn’t want this,” his demeaning, rude voice pulls you back from the dreamland you were trying to escape to. he forces you nearer to your edge, tiny whimpers leave your lips accompanied with loud moans as his fingers brush deliciously against your sweet spot. your precious cunt greedily pulls him in deeper and deeper, inviting him graciously into your womb but unfortunately, his fingers aren’t that long. but you know what is?

“you sure are dripping like a whore.” with every whimper which leaves your supple lips, bakugo feels himself get harder. his pants tighten as a bulge starts straining against his expensive, pleated bottoms. the hand prettily choking your neck detaches itself leaving you inhaling puffs of air as he works his pants off his hips. as you hear the rattling of his belt coming undone, a loud cry enough to draw attention from others outside of the room leaves your throat.

it catches bakugo off guard but nonetheless helps him get even harder, he likes to make you cry and get off to it. “why are you crying, bitch? it’s not doing you any favors here.” his fingers rub against your swollen, little pearl while lining up his fat cock to your blinking hole. “please, bakugo, don’t. i will do anything, anything else. just not this, i’ve never done this before.” you sound pathetic. your voice breaking with every word you utter. big, fat tears rolling down your cheeks while you ugly cried. bakugo almost feels sorry.

but in all honesty, he really couldn't care less about you. all your whining and crying only incite him further as ruthless ideas to break you down flood his mind. the kindest so far being him taking you right here and now but, but a sudden flash of seeing you utterly broken and in misery flashed before his eyes and he couldn’t let go of it. he wanted to see you tremble much more than you were right now. he wanted to see you cry much more than you were crying right now. Maybe he did hate you, he always pushed you around like you were his little pet of some sort to prove a point- that he is better than you. he is superior, you must respect him. you should kiss the ground he walks on, you should let yourself be his little plaything. then maybe, he’ll let you loose? who knows, he might just get even more obsessed.

as he watches you cry beneath him, your pathetic whimpers reverberating off the marble walls, a wicked idea pops into his head. he pulls his dick away from your exposed hole instead, replacing it with his fingers like before. “fine, brat.” his voice is softer, it surprises you. was he not going to rape you after all? “just because you said anything.” there it is again, the edge in his voice that makes you regret what you said. now, you know he has something worse planned for you. but it’s too late, you can’t go against your word now. you said anything, get ready to do anything. “stop squirming, i’m trying to make you cum. god knows whether you can even do that for yourself.” you most definitely can.

"a bitch like you needs someone to do everything for her.” again, you are probably the most independent student in the whole school,

“am I right, princess?” you are so wrong. “yes, master.”

no matter how crude and humiliating his words were and how much you hated his voice, you still found yourself clenching around his fingers almost ripping them off. your cunt squeezed his digits tightly as the coil building in your stomach tightened. moans of his name echoed all over the room as you felt yourself come closer. bakugo was taking his time playing with you, drawing you out making your release painfully slow as a form of revenge. you begged for him to play with your little clit so you could achieve ecstasy but he was too petty. after minutes of agonizing you to the point, there were tears streaming down your face and drool escaping your lips, falling onto the wet counter. he finally decided to flick his finger against your hardened bud. rubbing tight circles, he played with it aimlessly until he felt the gush of wetness around his fingers and the high-pitched scream which left your mouth as you came. his other hand pumped his still-hard cock. he was still pissed that he wouldn’t be able to cum inside you but it was fine for now. he had something much brutal set up in his mind for his plaything, he was aware that what he was planning might completely destroy but he figured it was worth it. much better to have a mindless slave who lives to fulfill her master’s wishes anyway.

he lets go of you, backing away with his hard cock still out and aching for relief. the huge head blushed red and leaking with pre, too bad he won’t get to finish inside of you yet. you quickly walk away from him, bending forward to search for your discarded panties. bakugo grunts at the sight of your wet pussy presenting itself to him, riling him up even more than he already was. He wastes no time pumping his cock at the sight of your exposed bottom, gasp and groans of pleasure escaping his lips,

“oi, what the fuck are you doing?” he asks, catching you sliding your panties on your legs. you turn around to face him, face burning when you are met with him stroking his cock at your movements. your eyes almost can’t leave the sight of his leaking cock, hard and begging to be played with and as much as you to admit it; it lights a fire inside you.

“stop fucking staring, you’re making it worse,” he growls and you immediately turn your eyes to his face. he smirks, “what? do you want it now? too bad, it’s too late,” he taunts. his eyes trail your body, eyebrows furrowing when he looks down your legs. “who told you to wear them,” he points at your panties between your legs. you give him a confused look, “you’re not allowed to put them on. give them to me,” he commands and panic crosses your eyes. you hesitate for a moment, debating whether you should listen to him or not. his fists clench as he glares at you, sending shivers down your spine, “what are looking at! give!” he speaks louder this time in a demanding tone as if he was scolding a little child who had picked up something from his office. your fingers tremble as you reach out to give the pink fabric to him, “leave.” what? you look at him in confusion. your big, doe eyes racking fear and anxiety. you wait for him to laugh or make a sarcastic remark about how gullible you are but it never comes. instead, he wraps your cotton panties around his cock, right in front of you, and begins jerking himself off. you are disgusted and petrified by his shameless actions, “what are you standing here for? leave. remember you said anything?” yeah, so you did. and you regret it already.

your legs tremble as you walk towards the door, pushing it open and peaking your head to check for people in the hallway. once you find it empty you walk out to the outside before sparing one last glance inside the dirty washroom. you hope for bakugo to call out to you, call you back but all you see is him cumming thick ropes into your panties while his eyes are screwed shut in ecstasy. yeah, you weren’t getting those back.

with shame and defeat written all over your face, you make your back to your classroom. your face is heated with embarrassment and humiliation as you remember you are walking around practically naked just an accident away from flashing yourself to anyone who cares to see. for the better half of the day, you walk around tugging your skirt as low as it can get. you don’t see bakugo for the rest of the day as he leaves you alone but when you do catch his eyes for a second or two, the wicked grin stretching over his features is hard to miss. He knows exactly what he is doing.

just as the day is about to end, he walks behind you squeezing your bare ass from under your skirt managing a surprised shriek from you when you feel his warm palms caress your ass pervertedly, “cute.” he whispers in your ear before turning you around and pinning you the wall. his fingers slide up your thighs moving closer to your cunt. warm digits graze over your slit earning a gasp from you, “come over, I will tutor you on the subjects you missed.” he kisses your neck, “come just like this.” he spanks your ass lightly before he leaves you be. his words are absolute and you know better than to disobey him, all of this was happening because you disobeyed him. you gather your things and walk up to his dorm room dressed just as you were before: in your school shirt, blazer, skirt, and no panties just as he wants it. when you arrive in his room you are met with his entire friend group sitting there with their books and pencils out. kaminari, kirishima and sero are not as surprised to see you as you are to see them. they greet you with happy faces which you return with a light smile.

“hey,” bakugo says with a smirk, guiding you to sit between sero and kirishima. between them the two humongous men, you feel like a child. with kirishima being tall and muscular and Sero being tall, lean and surprisingly packing a few too, makes you feel like a dwarf. you feel small and tiny in their presence and they very much notice it, sending knowing looks to one another while bakugo tries to tutor you. you know something’s up.

not a lot of studying takes place as kirishima grows impatient and slides his hand under your skirt and settles it over your cunt, rubbing his fingers on your pussy lips, occasionally pressing them on your clit. sero flips your skirt displaying your naked cunt to peering eyes. kaminari whistles, “wow, she really wasn’t wearing anything the entire day,” he comments. with one hand, Kirishima captures your wrists behind your back and pushes you on his lap. sero holds your legs to prevent you from squirming around like a dead fish, trying to break free. “so who goes first?” kaminari asks, walking over to you and crouching at your level. kirishima holds tightly with him seated on bakugo’s bed, kaminari flashes you a charming smile before his fingers run to unbutton your t-shirt, pulling your tits out of your bra. he tugs on one of your nipples while kishima’s large digits tugs on another.

“obviously me, dumbass.” bakugo barks coming closer to you. tears prick at your eyes as you beg him to stop, you tell him you’re sorry and that you will never disobey him ever again but he’s too far gone. the other men in the room might feel a little shitty about what they were going to do but there is no remorse in bakugo’s eyes. he looks at you like a predator looks at his prey, stalking about to pounce at any given second, “shut up, whore. you asked for this.” tears break loose as kirishima starts spreading your legs on command. wandering fingers rubbing at your pussy, trying to get you ready are forced to stop as bakugo declares that it must hurt for you. he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“you know you should have never said no to me right? be grateful for what’s being given to you, you’re our little plaything. a cute, little slut. you don’t get to say no,” his rough fingers grab at your jaw, prying it open as he spits in your mouth. “now just shut up and take our cocks, okay?” you cry out yes but he’s not satisfied. His hand strikes against your face, your cheek stings with burning hot pain as more tears leak out of your eyes. grabbing your face harshly, he lifts it up so you’re facing him, “okay?” he repeats. you calm your breath before answering him, fear and anxiety fucking you up in dread for what’s to come.

“yes, master,” you say in the most submissive voice you make out.

#tw: noncon #tw: dubcon #bakugou.🧡 #bakugou thirst.💥 #bakugou x reader #yandere bakugou #yandere bakugou smut #bakugou katsuki #yandere!bakugou #bakugou x you #bakugou x fem!reader #bakugo imagine #bakugou x y/n #bakugou x reader smut #bnha #bnha fanfiction #bnha smut #bnha x reader #bnha yandere #bnha manga #my hero academia #yandere #yandere smut #yandere writing #yandere fics #yandere x reader #kirishima x reader #yandere kirishima #yandere kaminari #kaminari x reader

[kpopinesss]

[ateez] S A N ➱ baby daddy au

YOU HAVE TO RAISE HIS SON AFTER HE LEAVES. MAFIA SAN.

warnings: teen pregnancy

a/n: sorry ya’ll I accidentally posted this on my main lol - @atinybitofau

• raising a son on your own was hard.

• raising a son whose genes were on par to his notorious father was even harder—

• a hooligan. a mischievous troublemaker.

• an eyesore in morality.

• and yes, your son was just like him.

• cold. ruthless. blood thirsty.

• but unlike San, your son loved you enough never to leave you.

• appreciated the things you did for him enough to stay.

• “Eomma..”

• you turn on your side when your son interrupts your slumber,

• injuries blatant on his tethered arm.

• raising a child who’s now 13 since you were 16 never easy.

• “Where were you, Ari?”

• he sits at the edge of your bed and leans for the warmth only a mother could give. “I was trying to get your medicine.. but I ended up causing a scene and the store owner kicked me out.”

• you sigh letting him lay down beside you. “It’s just a little cold. You don’t need to go and risk your life to save mine.”

• he wants to ask you.

• he’s old enough..

• why hasn’t his father came back to be the one the take care of you?

• to take care of him.

• why do you have to suffer alone?

• “Ari, just do me a favor and take care of yourself the way you do for me.” you cuddle into your sons warmth too. “That’s all I need.”

• but you’re lying.

• you’re getting sicker.

• and he can’t take it anymore.

• he goes to lower than the low to find something to save you, his mother.

• eventually ending up tied up in San’s gang house.

• brutally beat for intervening a drug heist—

• “Alright you little shit,” San holds your son up by the collar, blood running down his face mixed with his tears. “I don’t care that you’re 13 years old. Hell you could’ve been 10 and I’ll still beat the living crap out of you. No one just comes barging into a drug heist for no reason. That’s not just a coincidence.”

• it is.

• it really is.

• and maybe god was just giving him a sign.

• because you were on the verge of dying—

• and his own son being dealt his life and in the hands of his own father,

• yet San still didn’t know what was going on.

• what sign god was trying to give him.

• “I have to admit.” San runs a finger down his son’s chiseled jaw and smirks. “You’ve got a nice face. But in a couple minutes, you might not even be able to recognize it anymore.”

• “I-I-I was just trying to get medicine for my mom! I swear.”

• San really needed to get a clue.

• not all drugs were recreational.

• and some—

• some can actually save lives not just make dirty money.

• “You think I’ll believe that sissy crap?”

• Ari shudders looking to his torn up jeans. “H-her pictures in my wallet. I swear, she’s the only thing I’ll do anything illegal for. I promise I wasn’t trying to fuck anything up. She’d kill me if I got involved. Kill herself if I pushed myself too far.”

• he’s convinced at the desperation in the poor kid’s voice.

• normally not as merciful but he digs through the kid’s pocket for the picture anyway.

• and he should be glad he did because shit—

• the picture of you made him go from 100 to 0 real quick.

• “Y/n?”

• “T-that’s her! That’s my mom.”

• San glances up at the beat up kid, horrified.

• horrified at the sight.

• that he was basically beating to death a walking replica of himself.

• an age far enough that fit the time he left you.

• “You’re telling me my high school sweetheart..” San’s bloody fingers curl around your picture. “The woman you’ve been trying to steal medication for is your mom? The woman in this picture.”

• he’s at first in denial.

• that the kid he almost beat to death was your son.

• but denial hits him even harder the chances he could also be the father.

• “M-my mom is everything to me.” Ari bawls his last tears out begging for his own father to spare his life. or anything to save yours. “She’s only got me. I’ve only got her. S-sir please. At least save her. If you wanna kill me sir, please save my mom first.”

• his jaw clenches,

• still knealt down on one knee propped in front of his pleading son.

• studying every feature of his face.

• how on par everything was to his own.

• San was beating up his son, he realized.

• holy shit he was about to kill his own son.

• “Why didn’t she tell me?”

• “W-what?” his son chokes. “What do you mean?”

• “Fucking hell— kid, I think I’m your dad.”

• the five days that your son was held captive was long enough for your body to grow cold and weaker.

• laying in a hospital bed nearly blacked out.

• your son cries over your body as you sleep.

• hoping he’s not too late.

• not too late to give you the one thing that might be able to keep you alive.

• a husband?

• finally a father to your child.

• “You’re the husband?” the doctor finds San watching from the doorway awkwardly glancing at the black dressed men who towered behind him. “You’ve got quite the entourage there, sir. But not even an army of soldiers would be able to save your wife right now. She’s hanging on a thin line. Barely holding on. That woman needs a miracle if she wants to live the next good years of her life.”

• San watches as his son that he never knew about cries over you.

• wishes you would’ve told him..

• he would’ve stayed.

• would’ve loved you.

• why were you always so selfish? always wanting to do things that pushed you too far even if there were another option available.

• “Eomma.”

• you hear everything.

• your son.

• San.

• “Ma, I’m sorry I wasn’t able to get the medicine. I got into trouble again, ma. I’m sorry.” Ari folds his hand over your limp one’s. “B-but I have something even better. Someone who could help you and me. He can take care of us, ma.”

• it hurts.

• you want to wake up for your son because he deserves the world.

• he deserves a fight for the both of you but the option you chose came short.

• in the past, the option of never telling San in the first place of his own son.

• “Ma.. he’s gonna talk to you okay? I’m gonna let him talk to you.” Ari sniffles and suddenly your hand gets replaced with a different warmth. “He’s gonna tell you it’s gonna be okay. I love you, eomma. I love you. We’re gonna be okay.”

• it’s almost enough.

• your heart beats a little faster.

• burns a little more so you could breathe on your own.

• it’s definitely working.

• “You shoulda told me, bubba.”

• the nickname San had given you years ago,

• a nickname you thought you’d never hear again, rings in your ear and that light so far away,

• it gets further.

• “You shoulda told me about him. About you.” he lifts your hand against his trembling lips. “13 years? 13 years after I tell you to take care of yourself and now you’re almost dying. Come on now. My girl was a fighter. Pushed herself harder than she wanted to.”

• his voice is like a mantra—

• a dream that gives you a little bit more of life you we’re starting to lose.

• “Bubba, you were the love of my life. And I didn’t tell you enough how much I appreciated you. I know it may be too late and if god forbid I do lose you, I will make sure our baby stays safe okay?”

• you think if you were awake right now you’d be crying.

• as if a weight lifted off your shoulders.

• cause the one person who could save you right now—you and your son,

• was right here.

• ready to go merciless to keep you two safe.

• “I left loving you. And I’ll come back loving you. 13 years only kept us apart. But let me tell you, y/n, it never stopped me from loving you.”

• he’s unsure when he lets go of your hand.

• usually gets what he wants with one word—

• cause he’s a notorious mobster.

• but let’s just say you were the one thing he wanted he could’ve never gotten even with two words.

• 3?

• “I love you.” he continues. “And if I’m gonna have to love our son the way I should’ve loved you then so be it.”

• but life’s not like movies where you wake up right during a miracle.

• this miracle takes time.

• and after an EXPENSIVE deal of money and medicine to keep you alive,

• a year it takes for you to finally open your eyes.

• to a nice hospital bed room.

• filled with flowers and the reminiscent scent of old spice and San.

• your hair’s a bit longer.

• the sun’s definitely brighter.

• but not as bright as the smile you see once you turn to the side.

• “Good morning beautiful.” San reaches his forehead against yours. “How were your dreams?”

• you choke on a decent reply. “S-San?”

• “The one and only.”

• “Where’s— Where’s Ari? Where’s my—“

• “Our?” San chuckles softly. “You mean our son.”

• you kind of remember.

• it takes a while to remember the voices and the dreams in your head.

• how waking up to find them real was surreal on its own.

• “He’s at school, bubba.” San cradles your face in the palm of his hand staring at you like he was hypnotized. “I’ll have someone pick him up. Tell him mommy’s awake.”

• “San..” you shake your head in his hand. “How is this real?”

• “Our son might be a miracle worker. Brought us together the way we made him. Brought me so I could keep you alive.”

• cheesy as you remember.

• although this handsome and older version of your old flame you aren’t too sure.

• “So you just show up while I’m in a coma and play daddy while I sleep?” you hoarsely chuckle while he smiles against your lips. “Even after 13 years, you won’t grudge against me for not telling you?”

• “I can’t blame you for trying to save yourselves.” he admits with his lips still on yours. “I wasn’t good enough for you. I know still I’m not. But I’m gonna try this time. Even if I have to pretend I’m not who I am sometimes.”

• you two are interrupted by a crying teenager.

• one you remembered resembled San.

• but now them standing right next to each other,

• looking like two carbon copies and a surreal dream in your head.

• maybe you are dead...

• “Ma!” he shoves his father away abruptly. “Look ma! I brought dad! He helped pay your debt, pays for my school. Even finished the hospital bills.”

• you glare at your always boisterous ex boyfriend and long lost father to your son.

• “You did what?”

• “Did I mention this was my way of getting back at you for not telling me about my 14 year old son?”

• “San how the hell am I gonna pay you back?”

• you just woke up.

• and the doctor runs in ready to sedate to keep you stable for at least more than 24 hours.

• but the way San looks at you is enough.

• him being there like your life long medication itself.

• holding your hand while your son holds your other one proposing,

• “Marry me. And we can call it even.”

@atinybitofau

#ateez #ateez san #choi san #ateez imagines #ateez reactions #ateez scenarios #ateez preferences #ateez oneshot #ateez x reader #san x reader #san imagines #san reactions #san scenarios #san oneshot #san mafia au #ateez mafia au #san baby daddy au #ateez dad au

[atalante241]

A Dream SMP SBI focused AU where all of SBI is related and everybody in the fam know it, except Tommy.

Tommy just assumes that they’re really close friends or some shit, and Wilbur calling Phil dad sometimes is an inside joke between the two.

Like growing up they were a really weird family where all of them had like, their own house/building and they just vibed. Like Tommy was raised by Phil but he doesn’t really remember it (like, can you remember anything from when u were 0-5 yrs old? Cause I sure can’t.) and he was given his own building thing when he was like 5 nearing 6, through that ended up being left alone more. And it was purely by accident, and he started hearing Wil and Techno reffed to Phil as just “Phil”, so he started doing it.

Along time it completely slips his mind that they’re family and not just a very small gated close community, and as I said before they’re a weird ass family Phil leaves on exoditions sometimes. He even might take Wil or Techno along on chance, but not Tommy bc that is a straight up child. Sometimes the trips take months but Tommy isn’t bothered, why should he be bothered that his neighbors leave for months on end sometimes. So the now 7 yr old takes care of himself all alone, and he doesn’t see this as weird bc the rest of SBI doesn’t see it as weird. He just legit thinks that straight up children can live alone and be just fine.

This one time a creeper blows up his house, and because he’s got no clue on how to repair it he just makes a dirt shack. But he thinks it looks ugly (OOC I know) so he carves out this hill and lives in there, and that how he develops a habit of building his homes in hills and mountains. Also when he’s bored he starts mining and accidentally creates these basically ant tunnels that travel underneath the big ass clearing the SBI lives in, there’s also at least one tunnel that goes into/near one of the buildings the SBI have separately.

Tommy doesn’t feel neglected because he doesn’t realize that he should, being left alone for months. He doesn’t feel bad about spending most of his b-days alone because he thinks that he has no friends, and the people around him are just his neighbors and shouldn’t come to the random kids b-day party. He also doesn’t realize that usually ppl have to pay some kind of tax to live in a house somewhere, he jus thinks that u just build a house somewhere and thats it.

He’s kind of is close to Wilbur, but it’s more in the way of saying hi to someone as you pass them but never interacting with them. He gets closer to Wilbur through the drug business.

(Tommy meets Tubbo at the SMP, but they had been pen pals for 6 yrs. They got connected through a magazine that advertised pen pals and how it’d get you one, it worked and they became friends. Tubbo also knows of the fact that Tommy lived alone, and is on the same page as Tommy about the family.)

At 15 (nearing 16) he leaves for the SMP, he waves the rest of the SBI goodbye because for some bizarre reason they all came out to say bye to him based on the one thing he said to Wilbur about leaving. At the SMP things go like normal, except new conflict rises from Tommy simply not paying his taxes. Dream goes to confront him with some other people that tagged along just for the fun of it, only for it to turn into a giant ass street fight because: Dream thinks Tommy’s bullshitting not knowing what taxes are because he knows Tommy didn’t lie to him about living alone before (he believes him bc he knows how to do household chores and up keeping), and Tommy thinks Dream’s just trying to exploit him because he thinks he’s some stupid kid. Said street fight that lasted 2h became know as “The Tax Scrap”, as it was a scrap and in led to taxes being demolished completely so no one had to pay them.......there was a party held for Tommy because of it.

After Tommy turned 16 around the summer months Wilbur comes and they do the whole drug shit and independence, they get way close doing so but not nearly “brother” close. Wilbur’s sad about this because he thinks that Tommy’s mad at him and the rest of SBI for leaving him alone during all of their trips, while Wilbur’s angsting Tommy’s all “I’m so very happy. And I’m getting super close with my old neighbor, this is great! Hey the whole of the SMP looke at the man named Wilbur Soot and know that I’m in no way related to him but we’re just old neighbors!!”. Yeeeh, Tommy unconsciously lets everyone know that they’re just old neighbors. Unknowingly hurting Wilbur because he thinks Tommy doesn’t want anything to do with them and is just acting civil, so he tries to be like 10x friendlier. They become great friends.

Everything happens pretty much the same except Wilbur trusts Tommy less while in the ravine because he still thinks that he hates them, he and Techno also have a angst session while Tommy’s asleep bc they think he hates them. This is before the Vilbur and Festival (the angst session). During the Pit scene Wil says something along the lines of “He hates you, look—look at him. He despises you, look how..—how angry he is!” After the 16th Phil wants to talk to Tommy about everything and make sure he’s alright (Very OOC of him, I know.) but is deterred by Techno telling him how Tommy “hates” them, and that he refuses to acknowledge them as family.

Sometimes Ghostbur slips and calls Tommy his little brother, Tommy’s shocked because did that mean that Alivebur saw him as some kind of little brother figure? He’s very flattered and totally doesn’t hug Ghostbur out of embarrassment. Ghostbur sometimes slips infront of people that aren’t Tommy and that leads to a lot of confused people and a rumor mill (that’s actually true for once) that Tommy and Wilbur were actually brothers, while wisiting or maybe through the msg’s Ranboo asks Tommy about it and receives the anwser that Tommy and Wilbur weren’t brothers but Tommy’s pretty sure that Wilbur saw him as one, at least he assumes from Ghsotbur’s ramblings. Ranboo tells this to people and it leads to a lot of aww’s because adorable, and then those aww’s turn sad bc Ghostbur exists.

Everything goes the same as canon except after Tommy betrays Techno, Techno during the moment he and Tommy are yelling at each other while tnt’s exploding -making it impossibly hard to hear them and messing with the animatic audios- yells something about Tommy being his brother and betraying him. And that leads to Tommy saying something like “Did you really see us as that close...” and now he feels sad bc the friend he betrayed was so attached to him that he saw him as a brother figure, but that sets Techno off more bc Tommy still denounces them as family in his eyes and he’s pissed bc of it. So they start fighting, eventually Phil stops to watch them. He’s also pissed at Tommy for the same reasons, during the fight Tommy gets like super injured or something but neither Techno or Phil want to kill him before they get to know the full reasons as to why he disowned them.

That leads to angsty as hell dialogue that breaks everyone’s hearts, and the whole gang realizing that Tommy didn’t even KNOW that they were family. It’s silent after that (not really there’s like 50 withers still around and explosions are happening left and right, but u get the point), idk how it all ends put it has something like this.

Tommy gets hugged

He’s still bleeding so it hurts and he’s kinda dying

Bc Techno and Phil are sad and kinda want to start over (and let’s be honest no one in that family is fully sane) they figure GhostInnit would be easier to deal with, also they’re still mad at him so they stab him

While also hugging him, it’s real messed up

Some people witness it and are kinda creeped out because to them it looks like two ppl that aren’t particularly close to Tommy are just hugging him after they stabbed him as if they cared

Through some magical power of teamwork and friendship the ppl fighting for L’Manburg (rip) get Tommy away from them, and some other crap happens the two have to flee. Later on Ranboo goes to live with them (fuck yes to that, that boy deserves peace. But fuck Phil adopting him It’ll all go to hell. Have you seen Phil’s other two kids +Tubbo??) but stil travels to the SMP bc I refuse for his friendship to end with Tommy and Tubbo, he kinda carries the news of GhostInnit existing to them unintentionally. So the leads to a game of extreme hide n’ seek where Tommy doesn’t know he’s supposed to hide so people literally just shove him into closets, rooms and houses all willy nilly. The whole servers in on it except Dream who just looks at all of them like that one meme. (No, I do not know what I’m referencing but I know at least 70% your pictures something)

The end vibe: Happy GhostInnit vibing with friends while the whole server is playing hide and seek him as the hider w/out him knowing, if Techno and Phil get him they’re gonna have so much family bonding and consequently make Tommy mad at the server bc he thinks thy were keeping him from his fam on reason, when they’re were just actually trying to keep him away from the two anarchists that were after him for some reason bc they didn’t know about the fam crap. GhostInnit doesn’t know they’re family bc it was kind of a bad memory him dying, he remembers everyone but not the bad things that have happened with them.

(Cross-posted off of Ao3, fics inspired by this one

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28894026

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30526023 )

#241 writing #dream smp au #Dream SMP #tommyinnit dream smp #technoblade dream smp #wilbur soot dream smp #philza dream smp #ghostinnit

[hazard-queen]

Hi can I request headcanons for Leona, Floyd, and Malleus, where the reader is jealous of them? I prefer fem!reader, but I don’t mind gender neutral. I have no idea if I broke any rules, so feel free to ignore this if you want. I love your writing btw, have a good day :)

Oya oya how are you?

Y you really love them? 0///0

Arigato!!!

Thank you! Have a good day too and take care!

Leona kingscholer

• Somehow you were jealous of him, you always looked away when you ever approached him!...why? I don't know!

• "What's wrong with that girl glaring at me like if i stole her food!!!"

• Leona talked to ruggie about how strange you act around him, but alas! Also ruggie has no idea what's wrong with you, what would made you hate him that much

• Leona isn't the kind of person who would care what would others think or say about him but you began to just....annoy him!

• "Oi! What's wrong with you, human?"

• Again you just ignored him and looked away and minded your own business, you just felt jealous because he lives the easiest life he could have and you are here magicless also struggle to live there and handle headmaster's messions! Also he don't treat his family well and also he's not that kind to his nephew while you just wish to see a picture of your family!!!

• "Don't speak to me!"

• You said as you walked away angry leaving the man dumbfounded there

• "Tch like if i ever would want to!"

• Ok he was loud enough and you heard him and good, you are going to begin a shenanigan here!

• "Oh well! I don't like talking to useless people!"

• Oh no!

• "What did you just say?"

• "I didn't talk to you!"

• Leona made his way to you and you could see just how mad he was as all students moved away, you felt good by making him mad but let's say you began to be scared from the dead glares you got.

• " I'M useless? See who's talking"

• Yeah you just said this to him but why did it hurt now? Are you probably....crying?

• He was concerned with your tears that you were whipping, tho he enjoyed the victory but why he feels bad about what he just said.

• "Fine you're not that useless!"

• "I'm not? I mean of course I'm not!"

• It's just funny having a troublesome girl like you around leona isn't it? I can see how fast you are gonna be the most stubborn friends in the whole college!

• "So...would the IMPORTANT lady take a walk with me to the cafeteria or not?"

Malleus draconia

• Deep down yourself you felt you're just judging him wrong...he can't be that cocky...he isn't, is he?

• He doesn't walk alone, he's just well guarded which gives you the feeling he's an important queen of neverland or something!

• Did i mention the guy called lilia that always appears upside down on your head every time you talk bad about malleus and say "how dare you to speak bad about the next head of thorns valley bla bla bla bla "

• Malleus kinda noticed how you strangely dislike him...i mean yeah people are afraid if him most of time and always avoid him but you already came from another world and you barely know him then why are you just like that!

• You sat alone in the library reading as usual (but i don't understand Japanese! D': ) and he took the chance to come closer to you, he took the seat in front of you, you just closed the book silently and prepared to leave

• "Why are you doing this?"

• His question stopped you

• "Doing what? Isn't that what other people do too? Aren't you actually used to that?"

• Your jealous of him turned to be....cruel? What you said actually made malleus somehow...sad!

• "Oh no! Are you sad? Shall i call lilia for you to comfort you or wait for your guard to yell at me to blow up my ears?"

• "Why do you hate me that much?"

• "Oh well good that you asked! You have everything!, you're smart! You're rich, your guards are surrounding you....not like me.....I'm all alone..."

• He gave you a soft chuckle

• "Are you laughing at me?!"

• "No but...people actually love you! Not afraid of you and avoid you like they do to me!"

• You kinda felt bad for what you said cause yeah people here love you and care for you while you noticed how they fear him and treat him bad

• " w well....i I'm not afraid of you!"

• A blush began to form on your face and that was so noticeable for him as a smile began to draw on his face.

• " i....i don't mind if you want to be a friend of mine!"

• "Are you sure about that? I don't think it's a good idea!"

• "I i don't care about what you think! Now accompany me in a walk to the garden and it would be better to hold hands!"

Floyd leech

• You hated it! They don't accept you in most of the activities just cause you're a girl! And he keep on just being.....tall!!!!!

• He fits in basketball team, swimming club! Magift and everything and he keeos on saying .

• "Hey (y/n) chan! Wanna join us?"

• "No!"

• "But why not?~"

• "Because you're.....boring!"

• Why did you call him that? The guy was trying to be kind to you only to get a harsh answer every time he try to talk to you.

• You left the place to mind your own business not to say anything nonsense again cause it seems his twin wouldn't like you to say something else to hurt his brother!

• It was lunch time and you decided to buy him shrimps to make it up to him, you're jealous but you're not a bad person after all!

• You saw him walking by with his brother and azul and as you saw him you ran to give him the grilled shrimps but you got an unexpected response.

• "Thanx but i can't take food from toxic people!"

• You froze in your place as that's kinda.....cruel!

• He even walked past you and left you standing there, uncontrollably tears run down your eyes as he was right, your jealousy turned you into a toxic person!

• But after all it wasn't floyd's idea so he felt weak towards your tears, he walked back to you and placed his hand on your head while your cheeks got red from crying, he bent down to your level and gave you a smile.

• "It's ok to feel jealous but don't let it blind you!"

• "I I'm not jealous!"

• "You are!"

• You kept silent and avoided his gazes to you

• "Come on we won't spend the whole day crying! If you want to join any team i would make them do it!"

• " r really? B but how?"

• "By force!"

• Doing his famous arm squeezing movement, he squeezed you in a big hug to announce your new friendship!

#twisted wonderland #twst #disney twst #twisted wonderland imagines #twst leona #twisted wonderland leona #leona kingscholar #malleus x reader #twisted wonderland malleus #twst malleus #malleus draconia #floyd leech #twst floyd #twisted wonderland floyd

[kassies-take]

Thorul Over Luthor (Part 5)

A/n: okay yeah sorry y’all. The season of giving is over I was suppose to update this during the holidays but I never got around to it.  Well actually I had a spontaneous idea that changed the course of the story.

Warning: Love, Sister Teasing

Lena Luthor x StepSister!Reader, Supercorp

Word Count: 1538

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5

You lounged on the couch as Lena ran around her loft looking for her notes.

“(Y/n/n), Alex is going to pick you up for D.E.O training. I’ll stop by at lunch. Did you want me to bring food to you guys, or go out for lunch? Just let me know later.” Lena walked around the counter to your spot on the couch and moved your feet off the glass coffee table. “Where are my notes!” Lena went back to trashing the apartment.

You sat up before you noticed you had your feet on the notes this whole time. You knocked on the glass to get her attention, when you had her attention you shifted to hide behind her notes. 

“My notes!” She gasped before leaping across the living room to grab her notes. “Where were they?” 

‘Under my feet.”

“Under your fee- now my notes smell like feet,” she teased. 

‘My feet don’t smell!’ You gasped in in silence.

“I think the whole National City say otherwise,” she continued. 

‘If that’s the case, then we better sacrifice someone to save the whole city!’ you grabbed the papers out of her hands, before chasing after her to make her smell her smelly notes. 

That continued till the bell rang at the entrance, Lena stopped in your path which caused you to bump into her with her notes in her face. Your triumphant smile brought a smile to Lena’s lips as she moved to open the door.  

“Hi Alex, (Y/n/n) is ready. Beware of her smelly feet.” She whispered the last part. 

You crossed your arms in disapproval with a glare before you smiled, hugged Lena and kiss her on the cheek. Alex wrapped an arm around you, having what seemed to be a conversation she was having to herself to the outside world. 

As any DEO agent, you were to begin training with hand-to-hand combat. There wasn’t that many crimes that went through National City, that led to more time training with Alex and Winn. It was nearly lunch when Kara decided to drop in. 

‘Hey Kara,” you waved. 

“Hey little one, beating Alex’s butt yet?” Kara hugged you.

“Very funny Kara,” Alex rolled her eyes. 

“Hey! Now, that Kara is here maybe we can run the experiment to see if she can control people’s powers when she intercepts.” Winn beamed holding a tablet in his hand. 

You jumped for joy at Winn’s suggestion, you clasped your hands together and pouted at Kara. 

“I’m fine with it.”

You jumped into Kara’s body leaving your body still. Your excitement took over and you began fangirl. 

“Oh my god! I’m Supergirl!” Using Kara’s arm you felt around her arms. You began to feel weightless, the feeling of your feet slowly leaving the ground took you off Kara’s arms. You flew into the air flying in a figure eight path, laughing. 

Alex and Winn looked in concern as you began flying higher and higher towards the ceiling. You didn’t have time to try Kara’s other powers when the training room door open at the same time you hit the ceiling. Kara felt heavier now, like something other than Earth’s gravity was pulling her toward Earth. No surprise that in the midst of trying to land, you tackled Lena still in Kara’s body. Then you felt a feeling you did not want to feel towards your sister so you left her body. 

Kara and Lena both blushed red. Neither of them wanted to leave the other’s embrace, but it also didn’t help that Lena couldn’t move till Kara did. Winn secretly gave you a high five as the two practically had heart eyes. 

‘What’s for lunch?’ You spoke through everyone’s minds. 

“Oh, um, uh.” You , Alex, and Winn raised your eyebrows at the stuttering mess of your sister. “If it’s alright if I take (Y/n) out for lunch? Bring her back after?” 

A unanimous yes echoed the room before it fell into silence once again. 

“Uh Kara,” Lena’s eyes quickly darted towards Kara’s strong arms. 

“Oh. Yeah! My bad,” Kara pushed herself off the ground and Lena found herself missing her touch. 

You and Lena left the training room, once the door shut behind you Alex began to tease her sister, like you did with Lena. 

“Way to make it more obvious, Kar.”

“I didn’t do anything. That was all (Y/n)!”

“You know (Y/n) can feel your emotions when she intercepts you.” Winn left that comment in the training room as he made his way back to his desk. 

Kara’s eye widen. “ALEX, THAT MEANS (Y/N) KNOWS. WHAT IF SHE TELLS LENA?” Kara panicked.

“Kar, (Y/n) didn’t have to intercept you to know you like Lena.” 

“Is it that obvious?”

“You might as well write ‘I like you, Lena’ in the sky.” Alex left the training room. 

Lena was still flustered, that was mainly due to the fact that you were teasing her. 

‘You are so in loveeeee’

“I am not. And Kara doesn’t feel the same way.” 

‘Who d’ ya think you’re kidding? She’s the Earth and heaven to you. Try to keep it hidden. Honey, we can see right through you. Girl, ya can’t conceal it. We know how you feel and who you’re thinking of.’ You sang still connected to Lena’s mind.

Lena stopped in the middle of the sidewalk to turn back towards you. “No chance, no way! I won’t say it. no no!” 

You smirked as Lena unconsciously finished the song. ‘You swoon, you sigh why deny it, uh-oh.’

Lena ignored you and continued walking towards Noonans. You continued skipping around Lena singing. 

‘At least out loud I won’t say I’m in love’ Lena thought before you jumped higher and wrapped her in a hug and a goofy grin. 

‘Oh my god! You’re in love!!!!!!!! When you and Kara get married I called maid of honor! And when you have kids, you don’t have to pay for a babysitter! Although if you ever think of having sex, please don’t do it at our place.’ 

“Get out of my head, now. N! O! W! Right NOW!” Lena’s blush deepened as you only kept skipping and shining your smile. 

‘Thorul 1, Luthor 0′ You said before the walk was quiet.

You had lasted the rest of the walk, waiting in line, ordering food, waiting for you food and till you took the first bite of your chicken burrito wrap - filled with avocado, tomato, black bean & corn salsa, cheddar cheese & zesty pepitas dressing , wrapped in a spinach tortilla. 

‘Lena, what is love?’ 

“Are you seriously asking that right now?”

‘I mean Alex has Maggie, James has Lucy, J’onn has M’gann, Winn has Lyra, heck you will probably have Kara.’ 

“Huh,” Lena paused before she placed her wrap down on her plate. “Think of it as a snow globe.”

‘Snow globe?’

“Yeah, to most people it’s just a round glass object that gives the allusion of fake snow. But if you really think about it, when a snow globe is customized it captures the perfect moment. It’s a perfect life, the glass makes you feel protected, safe from any danger.”  

‘Is that what you feel for Kara?’

“Not only Kara, love.” She held reached across the table to hold your hand. “I feel it with the best sister in the world.”

You smiled back, already planning to get a snow globe for Lena. And that was exactly what you did the moment Lena dropped you off at the DEO. Unfortunately, the DEO became busier at the moment as there was an alien attack downtown. You were excited to put your skills to the test but then disappointed when Lena didn’t let you. 

An angry Luthor was something to not mess with. 

‘Thorul 1 Luthor 1.” You mentally counted. 

You spent your DEO time customizing that snow globe you were going to get once it was finished . 

It was about a week when the snow globe came in. You were working on some tech with Winn when Alex stormed her way towards the two of you with a box in hand. 

“What is that?” Maggie asked. 

“I don’t know, delivered to (Y/n) Thorul. Next time you need something delivered, could you put your address and not the DEO’s we are still a secret organization.”

‘But I couldn’t put my address or Lena would know.’

“Some type of sex toy?” Maggie bluntly asked with a smirk. 

‘No, it’s a snow globe.’ 

“Snow globe?” Winn, Maggie and Alex questioned. 

‘Yup, for Lena. She said it makes her feel protected and safe. Can you give me a ride Maggie?’ 

“Sure, kiddo.” 

‘In the front this time?’ 

“No promises.” 

Lena had made it home before you. The apartment was a mess, but it was a good kind of mess. A mess that showed that it wasn’t just her living in the place, before you arrived it was all white, now it had color, and framed pictures. Lena decided to rest her eyes for a bit before she heard the door clicked open. 

“(Y/n). I’m glad you’re home, we’re having take out. I don’t feel like cooking.” She stood up and faced the entrance. 

BANG! 

#lena luthor x reader #lena luthor #lena luthor x sister!reader #lena luthor imagines #lena luthor imagine #supergirl x reader #supergirl imagines #supergirl imagine #supergirl #supercorp #morgana pendragon

[gusdapperton-inactive]

Recently someone asked if I would do a gif making tutorial, so here I am! I’m going to make this as in depth as I can, but if you have remaining questions or problems, feel free to send me them and I will try to help you to the best of my abilities.

Disclaimer: There are many ways to make a gif, but this is the method I’ve been using for years. This tutorial is very long and may make the process seem tedious, but I assure you, once you get the hang of making gifs you could do it in just under a few minutes!

This tutorial includes:

links to all of the sites and programs I use

lots of rambling (w/ pictures)

a short masterlist of my favorite photoshop sources at the end

Links:

Adobe Photoshop CC 2017

PotPlayer (64 bit)

uTorrent

4K Video Download

Photoshop, PotPlayer and uTorrent are the three programs you MUST have for this tutorial. The 4K Downloader is for YouTube/Instagram, which there are other sites you can use for that, but I prefer 4K to make sure I’m getting the best quality I can get. Best part, they’re all free :)

Torrent sites: 

PirateBay

yts.lT (favorite)

Nyaa (anime)

These aren’t the only sites that offer torrents (nor are they the only ones I use). When you download torrents, try to be careful; if you think it’s sketchy, go ahead and try to find another. It’s not as scary as it seems, just be aware of what you’re clicking. Some are total duds but I usually have a pretty smooth time finding what I need unless it’s something unpopular or obscure. Whatever site you’re on, try to use the latest links (past hour/day/week) if it’s for a new movie or ongoing show. Also, if there’s the option, download magnet. 

PirateBay gives me an ongoing issue with their links, so I try to avoid getting torrents from there if I think I can find it elsewhere. YTS is my favorite site for movies; they’re trustworthy and I’ve never had an issue :) 

HD/1080p torrents often start popping up when the BluRay comes out, so don’t depend on any site to have it the day something premieres. Usually you’ll have to wait a few weeks/months. Until then it’ll just be CAMs which no one likes!

For this tutorial I’m going to be making a gif from IT: Chapter Two (link- click 1080p.WEB). Once you’ve gotten your torrent, open up uTorrent. It’ll ask you where you want your download stored, which I always just choose my Downloads folder. 

It’s normal for it to take a while. It doesn’t take all day, but 40 min-2 hrs is usually what I have to wait. My laptop is pretty slow, RIP.

After it says it’s downloaded, you’ll have the .mp4 sitting in your Downloads folder (or whatever destination you chose, but Downloads is the default). 

Before you close uTorrent, press the torrent file and then delete it (trash can icon above) so you can delete it from your Downloads folder. Otherwise, your computer will tell you the torrent is still open in the program and won’t let you. You won’t need it after you’ve gotten the .mp4.

So now we have the movie! Go ahead and open it up in PotPlayer. Right click > Open file(s) and select the movie. It will start playing automatically. 

Note: You need to make folders for the frames to be held in. Its been so long since I’ve set up PotPlayer,  I can’t remember if the program made the capture folder that’s in Desktop or if I did... if not, go ahead and make sure you have designated folders. (If you’re making 4 gifs, you need 4 separate folders, and so on.)

Go to the scene you’d like to gif. The scene I chose in this movie is one of the end scenes of the young Losers Club on their bikes (2hr43min).

Slide the edge of the program in to minimize the screen a little for the next step. 

Now, right click > Video > Video Capture > Capture Consecutive Images

This will pop up: 

Here is a closer look at the settings:

The key things to look at are the Image Type, Image Size, and Numbers/Frame to capture. And of course, make sure you have the right destination chosen in the Storage box because that’s where your frames are going to be. PNG and BMP are the best quality for the type of image. Always choose the original size of the frames. And, make sure you’re saving every frame (Every # frame must be kept at 1). 

Make sure to start a few seconds before where you actually want to make a gif. Sometimes (every time lol) the start will lag and you won’t get every single frame you want or thought you were getting. In my case, the screen is fading from white, so I’m going to capture a few frames where the white can still be seen before the full color appears. This way I know I’m getting the most frames I can, and I don’t have to redo it later when I think my gif is too short because I’m missing frames. 

While the movie is still paused, press Start in the smaller window, then press Play on your movie. Keep your mouse over the Pause button and end it when you’ve gotten all the frames you wanted. Then, Stop back in the small window. 

I’ve saved 56 frames to my folder.

The size of the gif you want to make dictates how many frames you’ll be using. Remember the file size needs to be under 3MB. Recently Tumblr increased that size to 8MB, but the quality of the gif will drop drastically, so I ignore it now. (Although, it probably won’t look too different if it’s at like 3.1MB and barely goes over that limit.

540px wide- ~30 frames and under. Because these gifs are so wide, naturally, they’re already going to be a large file. 

268px wide- ~50 frames 

177px- ~70 & up

These numbers aren’t concrete, though. The taller and/or more contrasting colors in a gif, the bigger the file will be. The shorter and less contrast in colors, the smaller, and more likely you will be able to fit more frames into your gif. These are just what I find to be the case most of the time. 

For the gif I’m making now, I’m going to keep it at 30 frames, so I know I’ll be deleting ~26 out of the 56 I saved to that folder. 

Tip: I rarely make big changes to the coloring of my gif if I really like the way it looks. If my gif exceeds 3MB, I’d rather delete frames. IMO, nice coloring comes before fitting in as many frames as I can. 

Moving on, now that we have the frames we want, go ahead and open up Photoshop. Go to File > Scripts > Load Files into Stack. The drop down that says ‘Files’ I change to ‘Folder’ and simply select wherever your frames are held. For me, they’re here:

Press OK, let them all load up, then you’ll press OK again in that grey window. 

It takes a minute for all of the frames to load up in photoshop. The more you have, the longer it’ll take. Again, my laptop is slow as hell, so maybe it will be really fast for you.

When they’re done loading, go to Window > Animation.

Then, inside the Animation tab, make sure you have Create Frame Animation selected:

Then once you’ve pressed it Create Frame Animation, your first frame will appear. But we need them all, so look over to that four bar icon to the right of the tab and press Make Frames From Layers.

They’ll load all at once, but the gif is backwards. To fix that, simply go back to the same four bar icon and click Reverse Frames.

I’m going to go ahead and delete the frames I don’t want. For me, the beginning frames are unusable because there’s that white fade out in the start of the scene I chose. I’m going to delete those, then go ahead and delete any frame that comes after frame 30. 

Here’s where I’m at now:

Now to resize it. I like the dimensions it currently has, so I’m not going to use the crop tool at the moment. But once you’ve cropped it to where you like, go to Image > Image Size and a new window will pop up. The widest a gif should be is 540px. How tall it is is up to you. Since I’m keeping the dimensions currently, my gif will resize to 540x225. 

It’s VERY important to note, where it says ‘Resample:’ you need to have Bilinear selected. This effects the borders of your gif. Also, don’t make the mistake of resizing it in centimeters instead of pixels. 

Now that it’s resized, you need to set the the frame delay. I choose either .05, .06, or .07. Anything outside of that looks to fast/slow to me (but I know a lot of people who like the way .03 or .04 look. It’s all preference.)

To select all of your frames at once, select the first frame, hold shift, then select your last frame. Then press where it says ‘0 sec.’ > Other > type in however fast you’d like your gif to be. I’m going to use .06. Double check every frame says .06, otherwise it’ll stay at 0 and be way too fast. 

Now, again, click that four bar icon and select Convert to Timeline. The Animation tab looks like this now:

For now, look at our Layers Tab, so we can delete every frame that doesn’t show an eye icon next to it (as you can see, my first 5 frames):

With all of the excess frames gone, select all of the frames you have left (hold shift again) and then right click > Convert to Smart Object

Now, we see this left:

And, technically we’re done with the very basics of making a gif. But you definitely should sharpen and color it for it to look ‘nice’ and aesthetic. I’m going to color my gif now. Personally, I rarely use psds. It takes way too long for me to look through millions of psds, so I make coloring my own for each gif I make. I have two of my own psds, if you’d like to use either of those. 

PSD01- this is a super basic psd I use to make any gif look brighter and more vibrant. There are more details in the post on how I use it.

PSD02- I included this psd within another tutorial for how I do color edits. 

Both of these are my base psds, but if anyone wants me to do a separate tutorial for how I color gifs on a regular basis, I’ll gladly make one of those too!

Once you’re happy with how the colors look, it’s time to sharpen. Select your gif layer and go up to Filter > Sharpen > Unsharp Mask. 

Here are my settings: 

(Amount: 100%, Radius: 0.3px, Threshold: 0 levels)

Now sharpened and colored, here is my final result ready to post:

If you’re wondering, this gif is 2.42MB, so I could still make it brighter/more vibrant if I wanted to!

To save, go to File > Export > Save for Web.

A new window will pop up. There are more settings that you should check to make sure your gif looks as nice as possible, but they’re also up to preference and can range from creator. This is what I prefer:

Diffusion is good for bright and/or colorful gifs, but if the gif is dark, I’ll change it to Noise to see if I like that better. Also, always double check you have the loop set to forever, otherwise your gif will only loop once.

And you’re all done!

Here is a short masterlist of resources I recommend checking out and use often:

allscallie (DeviantArt)

Their psds are beautiful, especially if you’re into making moodboards. Everything is very aesthetic!

sttoneds (DeviantArt)

More psds, especially if you’re into gifsets/photosets that are color focused. 

BEAPANDA (DeviantArt)

Literally everything they publish is gold. From brushes, textures, psds, renders; they have it all. Their packs are extremely well made, too. I highly recommend bookmarking them. (The renders and brushes look beautiful when you use them in your headers!) 

allresources (Tumblr)

There are so many photoshop resource blogs here on tumblr, so to make it easy on you, theirs is the one I recommend the most! The tutorials and resources she makes herself are really great too.

Thank you for reading, and good luck  +.ﾟ(*´∀｀)bﾟ+.ﾟｲｨ

#gif tutorial #photoshop tutorial #tutorial #*

[starryseo]

phone number. | yang jeongin

pairing ↠ jeongin x gender neutral!reader

genre ↠ just a fluffy barista au!!

wc ↠ 3229

summary ��� jeongin likes you a latte.

warnings ↠ just jeongin being cute and in loooove. its cringey.

a/n ↠ barista!jeongin bc who doesn’t love cafe aus?

cafe glow is well-known around these parts of town bc it has such!! great!! food and drinks!

it has a real homely feel so a lot of student from the nearby schools/ unis come here

and it’s a pretty big cafe so there’s a lot of space for ppl to come in and chill, whether that be large study groups or just individuals trying to cram for upcoming tests

that homely feel?? it’s bc of all the youngsters that basically run the cafe

it’s officially owned by mr and mrs bang, but their son, chan, manages this cafe a lot since they’ve got a few other places in town to run

chan loves recruiting teens to work bc, despite their hyperactivity (esp the lot that are currently there), they’re a lot less work to deal with than grumpy adults complaining abt wages

so!!

just a few months ago, jeongin started looking around for places to work at

let’s get that bread bro

he spoke to a lot of the nearby businesses like the florist, library and pizzeria but as soon as he entered glow and saw a blond guy downing shots of black coffee as he made different drinks, he Knew he wanted to work here

he headed straight to the counter (ok ofc he waited in line first but who cares abt that)

“welcome to glow, what can i get ya?”

“hi, i was wondering if you were hiring?”

“so,” the guy - nametag reading Felix - began, leaning forwards on the counter, “you wanna join the glow gang, huh? have you got what it takes??”

maybe he should’ve thought more clearly abt this-

“felix are u creeping out kids again?? i swear this is the last time i leave you on counter duty” the black-coffee-drinking blond huffed, wiping his hands on his apron as he left the coffee machines. he nudged felix out of the way, pushing him to the machines before he turned to jeongin. “i’m sorry abt him, i don’t know why i still keep him around”

“i heard that!”

 “anyway,” the blond - nametag with Chan printed on it - grinned, “what can i get for you?”

“a job here would be great”

“you really wanna work here,,,, with that?” he pointed over to felix who looked back with a frown

“yeah, it seems pretty fun!”

“you got a cv on you?”

jeongin is a Prepared Boi. before his job hunting run he printed off multiple copies of his cv so he handed it over to chan who briefly looked over it

“when can you start working?”

“when do you need me to?”

chan let out a chuckle at that, pocketing jeongin’s cv, “swing by tomorrow at 4 and we’ll work that out, yeah?”

jeongin went home a Happy Boy and the next day at exactly 4:37 he had landed himself a sweet job at cafe glow

ever since that day a few months ago, jeongin had been learning the ins and outs of the cafe

he’s learnt all about where felix hides his ‘secret’ stash of sweets, where to kick if the machines ever go down and jisung’s ability to not stop talking

jisung’s the guy in charge of training jeongin bc chan doesn’t trust felix with another human’s life and minho, an older uni student that works here part time, is way too busy flirting with customers to get more tips those uni fees won’t pay themselves u go bby

and chan himself already has a lot to deal with since he mainly works in the kitchens

so jisung has taken jeongin under his wing and taught him how to make all drinks (despite there being a manual for this) and how to deal with the customers

and even tho jisung is only 5 months older than jeongin, he n e v e r misses an opportunity to baby the hecc out of him

“what are the different cup sizes we have?”

“uh,, small,, medium and large??”

“goSH jeonGIN you’re so smART!!!! ily!!! what cAN’T you do???”

jisung’s overdramatic as hell but he means well

and it’s always funny when jeongin teams up with felix (still a pretty rare occassion) to prank jisung

one day jeongin had a test after school so he couldn’t come by

and ofc he let chan know this in advance but he and felix decided not to tell jisung

jisung was waiting around for jeongin to come and he literally almost started crying when felix told him an hour later that jeongin wasn’t gonna come

“,,m,y bab y ? jeonginnie??? wh at do u me an,, he won’t com,e??? felix you a s s don’t l i e to m,e,, :((((”

they even got minho to record the whole thing not for free ofc, and minho’s services are n o t cheap, but it was totally worth it

felix screenshot jisung’s crying face and it’s now the display picture of their glow gang group chat

which btw never shuts up bc: during the day (and work hours) felix, jisung and jeongin will be spamming it, during the evening minho will complain abt all the uni work he’s got to do, after dinner time the youngsters are back on it sending memes until like 2am, and then by 4am chan finally gets on and complains abt the boys killing his storage with their dumb memes & he gives any updates abt the next day’s schedule if need be

it’s a great system, hella wild and random, but jeongin loves it nonetheless

now for the part where u, dear reader, come in!!

it’s just an ordinary day, a bit quieter than usual but jeongin’s not complaining bc it gives him time to finish off some of his hw while he’s at the till

he looks up when the door chime rings and

(°ロ°) ! 

he’s vvv obviously staring at u as u walk in, his pen drops on the counter and his mouth is :0

damn yn you’ve broken jeongin

but does he care???

yes

is he stopping?????

also yes but you’ve already seen his dumbstruck face and he realises he was caught just staring at u when u walk up to him with a shy smile on your face

he doesn’t know what’s come over him

and he doesn’t mean to be some typical teenage boi straight out of a high school drama

but u just look so pretty he couldn’t help but?? go heart eyes??

he’s trying not to lose his cool when u finally reach the counter

“hi!” he grins, “welcome to cafe glow, what can i get for you?”

you order your drink and watch as jeongin types away at the computer

he’s rlly hoping the screen blocks his blush bc he’s still (´♡‿♡`)’ing and he’s pretty sure he can feel his blush at this point

“is there anything else i can get you?”

your number

he finds your thinking face so cute!! the way u bite ur lip a little as your eyes glaze over the sweet treats they have on display

he d i e s when u look back up at him and ask, “anything you’d recommend?”

he keeps his cool as he says some of his fave desserts, and you choose the cheesecake

“alright! will you be eating in or is that to-glow go”

his heart swells when u laugh at his pun but he’s highkey dYinG inside bc he wants u to stay for just a little longer

he almost cries when u say you’re eating in bc !!! yes!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!!! maybe he could try talking to you!!!!!

“sweet! take a seat anywhere, your food will be made shortly!”

when u go to pay for ur food he’s internally hating felix bc he swears all these mushy feelings he’s experiencing are bc felix made him watch back-to-back romance films

he’s taken money from a lot of customers but he’s never, n e v e r, wanted to just hold their hand and he’s honestly so close to just never letting go of yours rn but he mentally slaps himself

pull it together jeongin u dumbass

when u tell him to keep the change he’s just

s i g h can u get any more perfect

he yeets felix out of the way from the coffee machines and towards the till

“role change, i’m bored!”

“but chan banned me from the tills, he’s gonna kill me!”

“i’ll get jisung on you”

“uGHhgHGHghhhhh”

he’s halfway thru making ur drink when minho sliiiides next to him and slings an arm around his shoulders

“so, innie, who’s the cutie you’re serving?” ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

from his short time working here he knows that minho is in love with any kind of gossip and there’s no point in lying to him

esp not with this massive blush on jeongin’s face that’S STILL thERe bc jeongin peeked over and saw you taking out textbooks which means you’re gonna stay here for lo n g er than he thought

and he’s got this huge grin on his face :D

and no one’s ever that happy making coffee

esp not when felix is right next to them singing along to the twice song playing in the cafe

god knows who put felix in charge of the cafe playlist

an y w ay

“does our baby innie have a,,, crushhh on a certain someone???”

“noooooookay maybe? idk i just met them!!”

“:0!!!! our baby’s iN LOVE!!!”

minho said that so loudly!!! jeongin peered over minho’s shoulder and saw that y o u had looked up at the exclamation and he let out a sheepish laugh to try and make the scene look normal

u just grinned at him and he almost swooned

minho’s shouting alerted jisung who deadass ran from the other side of the cafe

jisung, out of breath: wh-what do u mean,, in love,,,??? you’re too young for that ://

even chan popped out from the kitchen. “jeongin loves someone?? how cute, who is it- felix, what the hell are u doing there, didn’t i ban u from the tills??”

“blame loverboy!”

“gUYsss :((( let me wORk!!”

“u do u, innie, go get ‘em tiger!” minho said, smirking as he took a step back

the other boys stayed quiet as well, chan filling up the front display with the baked goods he freshly made

jeongin quietly got to finishing off ur drink and grabbed a cheesecake slice to carry over to you

“h-hey,” he started, placing the plate and drink beside your textbook, “sorry it took so long,,,”

“that’s alright,” you smiled and all his worries literally washed away, “was everything okay back there?”

“yeah,” he rubbed the back of his neck, smiling shyly, “minho’s just easily excited and nosy, a terrible combination really”

u laughed at that and he grinned, his nerves easing away

“u guys seem really close,” when he saw u quickly look over to the counters he turned as well, just in time to see all four of them rush to try and act natural (altho jisung just dropped to the ground so he’s really a lost cause)

“they’re really crazy, but they do mean well,” he grinned, “except felix, avoid him at all costs”

“i’ll keep that in mind,” you chuckled when jeongin pointed out who felix was and felix just glared back at him, as tho he knew jeongin was talking shit abt him

“well,” he started, realising he should go bc a big group of customers had just entered, “i’ll leave u to it, i hope u enjoy ur food. let me know if u need anything else!”

he headed back to the counter, a HUGE grin on his face, he’s so glad his back is to u bc he’d be so embarassed if u saw

it’s bad enough minho saw and is non-stop teasing him abt it now

throughout his shift minho was just taunting him, cooing “innie’s in love~”

as he was dealing with other customers and running around the cafe, he’d make quick eye contact with u and each time he did, u let out the softest smiles, he’s pretty sure he’s never smiled this much

abt an hour later when the rush had died down, jeongin looked over to see that!!! u were still there!!!!!

he fixed up a quick mango smoothie, smth he always found super refreshing, and headed over to your table

“h-hey?” he tapped your shoulder when he noticed u had your headphones in

“oh, hey! i, uh, i didn’t order this?”

“yeah, it’s,, it’s on the house, thought you might need a pick-me-up, you’ve been working rly hard”

“ahh thank you!!!” u grinned at him so cutely, “would u like to sit down?”

he nodded too enthusiastically but he hopes u didn’t pick up on that ((u did)) as he sat down opposite you

for the next 30 mins? hour?? neither of u know

u guys just talked

he’s thanking god that there was no rush in customers bc he enjoyed spending time just talking to u

the conversation seemed to flow so?? naturally???

he found out ur name and that u go to a nearby school sadly not the same one as him

and u were taking the scenic route home instead of ur normal walking path or using the bus which is why he’d never seen u before

he’s so glad that fate brought u here today tho!!!! eternally grateful that u made that wise choice!!!

when ur phone buzzed with a message from ur family he finally realised that it was getting late

he watched almost in tears as u packed ur stuff up, thanking him for the drinks and snacks that he definitely didn’t steal from felix’s hidden stash

he went back to the counter, stars in his eyes as he leaned against the counter, opposite minho who was chilling by the till

“so, how’d it go? did u get their number??”

jeongin: (❤ω❤) 

jeongin, 0.02 secs later: ヽ(°〇°)ﾉ

felix, jumping in: “pls don’t tell me u spent all that time,,,,, and u didn’t get their number-”

minho: “loverboi was too busy making moves, eh?”

jeongin’s mood instantly dropped and he was so close to just headbutting the counter then and there

what if u never come back????

what if u came back when he wasn’t there?????

what if you’re on ur way here but then u see another cafe and u go there instead and fall in love with a barista there???????

jeongin’s 2 seconds away from pouting for all eternity when chan comes over and pats him on the back, “i’m sure they’ll come back!”

jeongin’s praying the old man’s right

and he is!!!!!!! cliche ik

u didn’t come back the next day which broke jeongin’s heart and he was honestly so close to losing all hope bc he’s incredibly dramatic like that

but u come back the day after!!!

jeongin’s wiping down a table when u enter and u spot him instantly and wave

he waves back but the cloth he’s holding slips from his hand onto the ground

and he rushes to pick it up but hits his head on the table when he tries standing up again

and he’s in so much pain but he just nervously laughs it away esp when he sees ur half worried, half trying-not-to-laugh-aloud face

when he sees u walking to him -- not the counter -- he’s counting to 100 in 3 seconds to try and calm himself down to not look like even more of a fool

“is the table okay?”

“yeah, i’m alri- hey, rude!” he pouts, faking a sniffle and rubbing his head

“i’m kidding, jeongin” (he had to bite his lip to not squEAL when u said his name) “are you okay? that looked painful :((”

“i’ll live,” he fake sobbed, rubbing away imaginary tears with the cloth in his hand before he realised what he’d just done and dropped it on the table in disgust (he highkey dieddd when u laughed at him again) “ew, i’m sorry you had to see all this”

“it’s fine,” you grinned, scrunching ur nose when u saw the wet smears on his face, “but u got a lil smth there” u pointed to ur own cheek

jeongin wanted to CRY

he knows he’s a cute boi (he uses this to his advantage whenever he can)

but rn??

he knows he looks like the epitome of a grade A DumbassTM

he just let out the longest s i g h

“i’ll be right back!”

he rushed off to the back and sorted himself out (and quickly iced his head)

he came back out to see u sitting down at the same table as last time

as soon as he came thru the doors u looked up and held out thumb, an eyebrow raised

and he reciprocated the gesture, telling u he’s all okay now!

he found it so cute that u cared!!! his heart: on fire!!

felix walked right to him, pulling him along to the coffee machines as he told him ur order

“u owe me one now loverboi!”

jeongin prepped ur food and took it to u like last time

but this time u initiated the conversation

“felix isn’t all that bad, y’know?” you said, holding onto your hot drink as it warmed ur hands up

“for now,” jeongin started, “trust me, if u ever have the misfortune of seeing him act cute, you’ll regret ever saying that.”

your nose scrunched as you imagined that -- jeongin gasped when he saw and then prayed you didn’t see that -- before you let out the cutest laugh he’s ever heard, “yeah, i can’t imagine that looking nice”

you two talked for a bit more until jeongin had to get back to the counter and take orders

he popped up at your table when he could, offering felix’s sweets and a refill

“do you treat all your customers like this? free drinks isn’t good for business, y’know?”

he went bright red at your teasing bc “nope, you’re special!” -- his eyes went w i d e when he said that and, if it was possible, his cheeks went redder -- but god, was it worth it bc your eyes sparkled and your blooming blush was so pretty he was starstruck

he cleared his throat, let out the most nervous chuckle ever, put the lemonade on your table before diving behind the counter

he could practically hear minho’s smirk from all the way over here

great.

it took a little while longer for him to psych himself up to go over to you again after that disaster

but seeing you pack up your bag made him forget everything and run up to you

“hey, you’re done already?” he asked, pouting as you put your last book away

“yeah, i’ve gotta help make dinner soon,” you replied, fixing your bag over your shoulder, “thanks for the drink, it was great!”

“y-yeah, no problem!” you loved his drink!! score!!!! “come again soon, yeah?”

“definitely,” you winked -- you winked, god his heart was weak -- before waving and taking your leave

felix slid up next to him, throwing his arm around jeongin’s shoulders

“pls tell me you got their number this time”

shit.

the top gif is jeongin’s face right now

#stray kids #yang jeongin #straykidznet #sk-writersnet #yang jeongin scenarios #stray kids scenarios #skz scenarios #jeongin scenarios #stray kids fluff #yang jeongin fluff #jeongin fluff #skz fluff #stray kids imagines #skz imagines #yang jeongin imagines #jeongin imagines #jgn

[spoonie-swiftie]

Tw: eating disorder and self harm

no specifics, no numbers.

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I’ve been thinking about my “journey” with my eating disorder since I read the article through a steady flow of tears last night. I usually HATE using words like “journey” and “warrior” and it still doesn’t feel like it fits right or natural in this context even though its the truth. It’s been a very long, very wind-y, crappy and treacherous road that started and stopped many times over the past 28 years and while I wish I didn’t have to ride this very shitty, low budget, rickety ass roller coaster it’s mine and I’m proud to have made it as far as I have. I’ve wanted to talk about it and I have in bits and pieces for years. But between the article coming out last night and seeing so many of my swiftie friends talk about their struggles with body image and disordered eating and seeing a ton of my chronically ill friends coming forward and sharing that they, too, have struggled with the same issues as well (unfortunately most of us have since chronic illness takes a lot of body autonomy away and eating disorders give us a very false sense of control) I really wanted to open up and share, Just to get it out of my brain, even if it gets buried by algorithms or nobody cares reads it.

I read this article written by Variety on a snippet of @taylorswift new documentary Miss Americana as soon as it came out. In it she explains how the unsolicited comments and opinions of people in and out of the media about her appearance ended up putting thoughts in her mind of what her body “should” look like and subsequently what she should or shouldn’t eat. Thankfully it sounds like she’s doing better but as I know all too well it’s extremely difficult to kick those self critical thoughts out of our brains once and for all. The thing that I think hurts my heart most is that after her helping me through years and years of my eating disorder and listening to Tied Together With A Smile on repeat so many nights and hating everything about my body, or lyrics like “and it’s a sad picture, the final blow hits you, somebody else gets what you wanted again. You know it’s all the same, another time and place. Repeating history and you're getting sick of it But I believe in whatever you do, And I'll do anything to see it through. Because these things will change” or “Wish I could make it better, Someday you won't remember, This pain you thought would last forever and ever” or “Ten months sober I must admit just because you’re clean don’t mean you didn’t miss it. Ten months older I won’t give in, now that I’m clean I’m never gonna risk it” i sang these lyrics like they were prayers I was sending to God and they were some of the few things getting me through and making me feel better. It felt like she opened me up like a well loved novel and took excerpts of my life and made them poignant and purposeful. I just hate that she has had to deal with the same feelings and it makes me wanna drop kick all the people who put their two cents in on her appearance. Repeatedly. With spikey steel toed boots.

If you’re unfamiliar with my story, here’s a tiny snippet of my life and my experience with the crappy brain monster that is disordered eating and it’s best pal body dysmorphia. I went from being tiny (thanks to growth hormone deficiency) and twig like my first 14 years, being a cheerleader and never even thinking about how I looked and then I got injured, (which kicked my genetic condition Ehlers Danlos Syndrome unbeknownst to us at the time into high gear) went from being active every day to being homebound and spending most of my time on the couch. My muscles that I worked so hard on left and everything got soft and squishy and between years of different doctors looking me up and down, deciding I must not have anything physically wrong and telling me and my mom that I was just making it up for attention I got angrier and angrier at my body for ruining my life and taking most of my friends away and started taking it out on my body. I struggled with self harm in silence for many years before I ever dealt with food issues but as I’ve learned it self hatred is damaging no matter what actions you partake in. My mental health got better after I went back to school, was diagnosed with fibromyalgia (EDS was still hiding) and joined band but after I had to drop out of community college & went back to spending most of my life in bed that’s when I developed my eating disorder. I didn’t even realize that I had an eating disorder until after I had gone through multiple rounds of treatment. I thought I couldn’t have an eating disorder if I wasn’t underweight (spoiler alert: eating disorders have very little to do with your weight or size and more to do with your thoughts and actions just so you know 🥰) When I was my sickest and was admitted to a residential treatment facility I wasn’t underweight (I was actually “obese” according to my BMI which is the biggest crock of shit but that’s a whole other story) and I had to be constantly reminded that I deserved to be there because even if I couldn’t see it my brain was just as sick as the girls who were underweight. When I finally started accepting it (5 ish days in) my insurance decided that even though all my providers said I needed to be there, had completed multiple outpatient treatment programs, and I was pre approved before I even stepped foot on property I wasn’t “sick enough to warrant such intensive treatment”. Literally told my mom and I that they wouldn’t pay because I wasn’t thin enough. I’ll never forget hearing my mom sobbing on the phone and promising them that if I died they were to blame. Thankfully, even though I didn’t get the treatment that I deserved and needed, something clicked during my third program and I recovered and while I still consider myself to be mostly recovered, having my weight yo yo-ing from Gastroparesis (literally my stomach is paralyzed and food doesn’t digest normally which is why I have a feeding tube) and other symptoms of GP screws w/ my head every once in a while. But I’m so thankful that most of that is behind us, for me and Taylor, and I hope to God it stays there. And while it’s definitely not something I would have chosen for myself (they’re really not fun, 0/10 wouldn’t recommend) I’m thankful for the people I’ve met along the way because they are some of the strongest people on this earth (even if they’re rolling their eyes while reading this, you know who you are ♥️) and I’m so proud of us and the things we’ve learned along the way. And I hope one day I can hug Taylor and thank her for all the strength and courage SHES passed on to me through her music over the last 13 years.

~love love love~

Mandie

Photo timeline:

1-this was taken at the ComeBacks retreat this November. I can honestly say I feel the most at peace with my body image now than I have in 13+ years (2019)

2-when I was physically my healthiest. I was an All Star competitive cheerleader and was very physically fit, but at the same time I didn’t think about how I looked hardly ever (2003)

3-after I got injured and was homebound from school. This was when my feelings about my body started to plummet and I was super depressed (2005)

4-during my very short time in college, just before my disordered eating started (2010)

5&6-after I had to drop out of school because my health dropped off a cliff. This is when my mental health started to turn and my disordered eating took off but I was hardcore in denial (2011-2012)

7-during one of my intensive outpatient treatment programs that actually ended up making me a hell of a lot worse (2012)

8-right after I finished my last treatment program and it finally stuck. I was in recovery but not considered Recovered yet (2013)

9-one year behavior free! (2014)

10-definitely the heaviest I’ve ever been and the sickest physically but also some of the happiest times as well (2016)

#eating disorders #eating disorder recovery #eating disorder #taylorswift #taylor swift #taylurking #dysautonomia #spoonie probs #mitochondrial disease #postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome #swiftdisabledselfies #chronic pain #fibromyalgia #gastroparesis #ehlers danlos syndrome #eating disorder awareness #body dysmorphic disorder #disordered eating #mental illness #mental health #mental heath support #mental health matters #mental health awareness #neda walk #neda #ednos #anorexia nervosa #swiftie

[saiilorstars]

It Had To Be You

Ch.26: I Am Who I Am // Story Masterlist

Fandom: The Flash

Pairings: Barry Allen x Female OC

Pronunciation of OC’s name: Bell-en. The last syllable has an emphasis so it’s not pronounced like ‘Helen’ would be.

~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~

Chapter Summary: Barry comes face to face with Eobard Thawne, the man behind his family's destruction. Belén is on the opposite side as she's down one more Palayta.

{Previous chapters}

"After an epic street battle with the Reverse-Flash, our city's very own Scarlet Speedster disappeared in an explosion of light…" Caitlin stopped reading from the futuristic article to look over at Barry, the man still in shock. "The date is from the future," she said, although she didn't know if this was a good or bad thing honestly. Everything was so confusing. "April 25th, 2024."

Barry looked for the sentence that Caitlin had read, forcibly tearing his eyes from the article's authors underneath. "When I fought the Reverse-Flash at Christmas, he said that we'd be fighting for centuries."

"But if that's true then it would implicate that Dr. Wells, or whoever he is, is also...from the future," Caitlin blinked, quickly looking back to the article.

Cisco spoke up finally, but not about the current problem. "I have to say, I'm really digging the brighter red suit. And the white on the symbol? That's dope." But then his initial happiness faded. "Wait a second. Suppose we now change the color on your suit. Will it be because we got the idea from this picture? That would mean we're living in a causal nexus. This... wow. This is so trippy. Like, Marty and the Polaroid trippy. Not as trippy as the name on the byline though." And then he smirked. "Annah-Belén Allen?"

There was an indescribable expression on Barry's face. Once again his eyes were drawn to that name. It gave him a little...ping? No, no, a definite wham in his heart. That was his Bells, his Bells with his name. At some point, despite everything bad, they'd gotten married. She was his wife.

Oh boy, that made his mind spiral with different thoughts all at once, some of them leaving him a bit red.

"Mazel tov? Cisco slowly went, both he and Caitlin assuming Barry was still in the middle of processing the news.

But suddenly, an entirely different voice responded. "Hebrew. Ancient language of the Jewish people."

"Uh-uh. What the hell was that?" Cisco quickly scanned the room.

Barry snapped out of his stupor momentarily to face the problem. "Is someone here? Hello?"

A blueish holographic head appeared just in front of the three, giving them a fright. "Good evening, Barry Allen."

"Uh... H-hi…" Barry and the others took a large step backwards. "You know who I am?"

"Of course. Barry Allen, director of Central City Police, CSI Division."

"Director?" Caitlin repeated. "I guess you get a promotion."

Gideon continued, "Also known as The Flash. Founding member of…"

But Barry didn't care to listen that ending. "What are you?"

"I am Gideon, an interactive artificial consciousness."

"AI. Sick," Cisco said, clearly impressed.

"You know Dr. Wells?" Barry asked.

'Yes."

"Do you know who he really is?" further asked Caitlin.

"I don't understand the question," Gideon responded.

"I... I mean, what is he doing here?" Barry explained better. "W-why did he come here?"

"To kill you," the bluntness in Gideon's response made everyone freeze.

Cisco's phone vibrated and he quickly pulled it out of his pocket. "Wells is in the building."

Caitlin snapped her head his way. "What? How do you know that?"

"I put a tracker on his wheelchair," Cisco explained and immediately Caitlin shifted disapprovingly. "Which, if we're wrong about him and he is paralyzed, I'm going to hell for that one. He's in the Cortex. Ask questions fast."

Barry had many questions to ask but there was one he needed answered. "Why did he kill Nora Allen?"

"Because he was angry."

"About what?"

"That you escaped."

Barry felt dumbfounded, honestly, to learn that his mother died because he hadn't.

Cisco, who remained on his phone tracking Wells, spoke up. "He's on B level. He's coming this way."

"What does he want from me?" demanded Barry.

"For you to be The Flash."

"Maybe that's why Wells let the particle accelerator explode, so that you could become The Flash," Cisco remarked from behind.

"Why?" frowned Barry, who took a moment to think. "I mean, for what reason?"

"Guys, we got to go. He's almost here," Cisco said, tapping Barry on the arm. "Hurry!"

But they had only made it halfway when Cisco stopped them. "Wait a second. Wait. What if HAL over there tells Wells that we were in here?" he pointed to Gideon whose holographic head remained in place.

"That would be bad," Caitlin blinked.

"If I can get into its operating system, maybe I can disable its memory core…" Cisco theorized, and prompted Barry to ask Gideon for her operating system. After taking a look at such system, Cisco scoffed. "Yeah. Nope. That's not gonna happen." He quickly checked his phone again and panicked. "Guys, he's in the corridor."

Feeling desperate, Barry resorted to just simply asking, "Gideon, could you just, like, not tell him that we were here?"

Gideon surprised them all by responding, "Of course. I will accept any command given to me by you."

"Barry. Come on," Cisco motioned them to get going again. "We got to get out of here."

Barry shook his head and remained right where he was. "Wait, wait, wait. Why would you accept my commands?" he asked Gideon.

"Because you created me."

That answer left Barry even more stupefied. He let the others drag him out of the room.

~ 0 ~

"Hey," Iris tapped Belén's desk and laughed when Belén's eyes snapped up at her in shock. "Snap you out of some good fantasies?"

"What - no!" Belén shook her head, lowering her pen she'd been chewing on while thinking.

Iris put down a freshly printed out paper on the desk and tilted her head. "Then why did you look so spaced out?"

"I just...I'm worried over Maritza. She's been gone for a week and I still don't know where she is nor why she left," Belén leaned back against her chair, almost biting blood off her lower lip from the force.

"And she hasn't even tried to call Axel yet?" Iris asked.

Belén shook her head again. "No, and that's what gets me. She just got up and left us."

Well, that wasn't entirely true, Belén thought. Maritza left a short, cryptic letter for them explaining she was leaving. Of course, it didn't really explain anything.

Belén, I'm sorry. I am so sorry but I can't do this anymore. I've been drifting for months now and my actions have finally caught up with me. I'm not brave enough to do it, to face you all, so the only thing left for me to do is go. I love my family, and I love my son but now Axel is better off without me. I'm not the mother he deserves. Please look after him, you're his favorite aunt and I know you love him almost as much as I do.

I'm sorry.

- Maritza.

"It has been a week since she left...why not go to the cops?" Iris was cautious in how she said that. She didn't want to make Belén think about the fact something bad could've happened to Maritza.

"Yeah... I've been putting it off hoping that Maritza would come back, but...maybe it is a matter for the police," Belén figured she would talk to Barry about it and then decide if STAR Labs could handle the job right now - what with investigating Wells being an almost full time job - or if she should really leave it to the police. After all, she did have ties to the police both in Central City and in Starling.

"You want me to come with you during lunch?" Iris was up and ready to help if Belén needed her, but Belén shook her head.

"No, thanks. I just have to do some thinking first."

"Okay," Iris didn't even want to know what it would be like being in Belén's place at the moment, but she would be there if Belén needed her. "Do you want to talk about some new topics for this week's paper?"

"Yes please," Belén admitted it was nice getting to some normal issues of life, even if it was just for a bit. Iris was really good at reminding her that she did have a normal life despite everything.

Iris beamed and slid her paper over to Belén. "Okay, so check this out. I've been trying to figure out more about that blue guy that showed up at the Mayor's auction bit - remember him?"

"How could I forget?" Belén mumbled as she began skimming the single paper.

"Well, I thought he reminded me of someone and then I realized that it was the same man who once broke into this place, with that Plasticine woman and Pixel, right before you were kidnapped," Iris said, beginning to speak a little more fast the more she got excited over it.

"Also remember that," Belén made a face.

"But all of a sudden he's just disappeared. And do you know the crazy part? That other woman, Plasticine, she's sort of gone too…"

"So you want to write about them now?" Belén wasn't sure if this was the best idea, writing about her brother's comrades. It could provoke them into coming back and worse.

"Yeah, I mean, I think no one's realized that we got a got like a little band of evil metahumans in the city," Iris smirked. "I thought we could be the first. And...you know…" she leaned forwards on the desk to speak in a hushed tone, "...maybe you could ask the Flash to give you some info about them?"

"Iris," Belén sighed, although mildly amused.

"Oh c'mon, he has a crush on you so you know he'd do it," Iris playfully jabbed Belén on the arm. "Pleeeeeeeeease?"

"I can't believe we're still on that topic," Belén rolled her eyes and handed Iris her paper back.

"Be grateful I haven't told Barry about that," Iris said, playfully pointing at Belén. "He'd go ballistically jealous. Who wouldn't be if he was the competition?"

"Iris," Belén rubbed her forehead.

"N-n-n-no, don't worry, I won't tell anything about it," Iris promised seriously. "But could you please just ask about the metahumans? Please?"

"Okay, fine," Belén said, just to get Iris to leave it alone. "I will see what I can do…"

Iris beamed and promised her she would earn a nice Jitters if it all went well.

~0~

Barry could not find himself focusing on anything right now that didn't get him a step closer to taking Wells - or the Reverse Flash - down. It was all so confusing not to mention horrifying. It was no wonder Singh called him out on his lack of productivity at work. But then, it only lasted a minute or so until Singh too was distracted with something else of his life - marriage. That only sent Barry into a further state of overwhelm. That theme wouldn't stop, and it appeared it wouldn't stop with Eddie either.

"Oh my God!" he nearly fell backwards when Eddie showed him the engagement ring meant for Iris, tucked inside a small turquoise box.

Unfortunately, Barry was not the only one to see.

Belén could barely contain her squeals as she crossed the lobby to reach the two men. "I saw a turquoise box! Where's the turquoise box!? Show me the turquoise box!" She wiggled her fingers excitedly. Eddie was half amused and did as told lest she hit him. Belén gaped at the beautiful ring inside. "Oh my God," she smiled and looked up at Eddie.

"You can't tell her!" were his first words, making her chuckle.

"Secret for a secret," she raised a hand in solemn swear. "So have you thought of how how you're going to do it?"

"Well-" Eddie was going to explain his dilemma but Belén, just too excited, cut him off as she began to ramble on much she typically would.

"Oh! Are you going to do like the traditional, but cliche, hide-the-ring-in-a-piece-of-cake thing? No wait-" she looked to the side, quickly thinking of something else, "- it was a breadstick. I can't remember what movie that was. Or are you going to have like an airplane fly in the sky writing the words 'Iris, will you marry me?'" she made a gesture of each word with her hand. She stopped smiling a little when she saw both men staring at her. "What?"

"You thought about all this?" Barry was the one to speak up, though after clearing his throat.

"Well, what kind of girl hasn't thought about her wedding?" she countered, crossing her arms. "Haven't you thought about it?"

And just thinking about the future article again made Barry quickly shake his head. "No! I have never thought about us getting married, nope…"

Belén, more amused than annoyed, pointed out, "I never said about us. I just asked in general." Barry stiffened, his face quick to give up a flush. "But it's nice to see you're already nervous about it." She laughed and turned to Eddie. "So, what's the plan?"

It was then that Eddie could tell them his problem. "I was gonna propose tonight. All right. But I went to Joe to ask for his blessing. He said no."

"He did?" Barry repeated, confused.

"Repeatedly. I need you to talk to him, find out why…"

Barry made an apologetic face, "Uh, Eddie…"

"Look, I know me asking you like this, it's a little awkward," Eddie amended, "But you know how heartbroken Iris is gonna be if she finds out that Joe's not on board."

"He will most definitely do it, Eddie," Belén assured the man, then placed a hand on his arm, beginning to giddy up again, "And then we can plan the perfect proposal! Eek!"

"Oh, thanks. I appreciate it so much," Eddie said to both of them, and couldn't help get excited when he added, "And so will the future Mrs. Thawne. Iris Thawne..." he tested the name, chuckling, "Sounds pretty good, huh?"

"I think she's going to wanna hyphenate," Belén teased when Eddie left, chuckling to herself as she looked back at Barry and added, "That's what I wanna do."

"I have a feeling you wouldn't," Barry mumbled to himself but the moment she turned her head in his direction he jumped to change the topic. "What can I do for you, Bells?"

Belén got serious pretty fast, and judging by her face Barry knew exactly what she wanted to talk about. It was the topic he'd been desperately trying to get brave enough to be honest about.

"I'm really worried about Maritza," Belén felt like a broken record the way she talked so much about her sister's disappearance. "It's been a week and she hasn't called, texted, or returned from wherever she left to. I've tried looking for her myself in her old neighborhood but she's just not there. I'm thinking about finally going to the cops. I mean, for all I know, that letter could've been forced or forged. Do you think STAR Labs has time to look for Maritza or should I just go directly to the cops?"

In all the time Belén had been talking, Barry had tried to get some courage to speak up. He was trying - really trying - to tell her the truth about Maritza. He honestly never thought Marirza would choose the coward's way out and abandon her son and sister, leaving him to tell Belén the truth. Over the past week, he'd been working hard to convince himself that it wasn't his fault Maritza left. After all, he offered her the chance to come clean to Belén - he offered her the opportunity to mend her mistakes. It wasn't his fault Maritza chose wrong.

That was a difficult thing to accept when he kept seeing Belén so concerned and even scared over what happened to her sister.

"Barry?" Belén's voice brought him back to the present.

His eyes snapped back to her and realized he'd been silent for over a minute. To her it must have appeared like he hadn't heard a word of what she said. Fortunately, Belén was much smarter.

"What's going on with you? You've been so...distant with me. And whenever you do that, it's because you're not telling me something," she crossed her arms and looked him over, up and down.

"I-I just have a lot on my mind," Barry rubbed the back of his neck. It wasn't a lie, but the way he said it made Belén even more suspicious.

She looked at him in her special way - a look all too difficult to look away from - and frowned. "So get one thing off your mind right now. I'm all ears."

Stop being a coward, Barry berated himself. Belén deserved the truth and he really wanted to say it but...he couldn't imagine her reaction. Already she was having trouble dealing with her brother's reality and now he was going to add a second villainous sibling? But how could he word it to avoid a bad reaction?

"Barry," Belén said with annoyance lacing her tone. Perhaps it was because of everything on her plate that she got so irritated with him so quickly. She turned away and started heading for the elevator.

"Belén, c'mon," Barry sighed and went after her.

"Barry, I have enough problems and the last thing I want is an argument. So-" she pressed the elevator button, "-I'll just go and cool off. Maybe it'll give you time to speak up about whatever it is you're keeping from me."

"You're mad at me..." Barry threw his head back, scrunching his face for a moment.

Belén stepped into the elevator and turned to him with a flat face. "No, I'm irritated. And tired. And confused. But I've told you all about it. So sad you can't do the same."

Barry felt the sting of her words and even more so when the elevator doors slid shut. Thanks a lot, Maritza, he felt actual anger towards that woman.

~ 0 ~

"She's mad," Barry crossed Joe's living room, retelling the argument he had with Belén with Cisco and Caitlin. They were waiting on Eddie and Joe to come back from work so that they could talk about their findings in STAR Labs.

"Well, here's an idea - and it might be a good one," Cisco sarcastically turned his palm up beside him, "Why don't you just go ahead and tell her that Maritza is Plasticine."

Caitlin, who sat next to Cisco on the couch, was shooting Cisco a glare. "Because obviously that's not an easy thing to say." Barry made a gesture at Caitlin, thanking her for being much more understanding.

Cisco shrugged his shoulders. "Better Belén be angry at Maritza than Barry, right?"

"Dude, that's not it," Barry brought his hands to the back of his head. "I am trying to tell Belén it's just..." he once again gestured to Caitlin, "It's not an easy thing to say. I mean, how am I supposed to explain to Belén that, apart from her brother, her sister is also an evil meta who has killed and robbed and basically made our lives miserable for almost a year now?"

"Yeah, okay, I see your point but Maritza ran and if you don't say anything it'll just get worse."

"Cisco's right," Caitlin said after a minute. "You decided to give Maritza a chance and - I'm sorry if it sounds mean - but you basically gambled and lost."

Barry loved his friends but right now, he was irritated that they were right. Thankfully, Joe and Eddie arrived so Barry jumped at the opportunity to change topics. Once Joe learned what Belén had, he couldn't help become the father figure who scolded the children after they did something bad.

"Really? For three very smart people, that was really stupid. What if Wells had caught you in that…"

"Time vault," Cisco thought to help.

"Okay," Eddie shook his head, looking confused, "I know we've seen a lot this past year, but time travel?"

"I did it," Barry blurted and quickly received looks from the others. "Or I will do it, I mean…"

Eddie looked flatout done. "Excuse me?"

"One of the two speedsters in Barry's house the night his mother died was Barry. I mean, The Flash," Cisco began to explain. "He was there. Which means that one day in the future, Barry will travel back in time to that night."

"Okay. Actually, I wasn't talking about that. I kind of already time traveled," Barry said, thinking it was best to just tell them the truth now. "By accident."

"You did what?" Eddie asked.

"I was running to try and stop a tsunami from hitting the city…"

"And when was that?"

"A few weeks ago," Barry replied then looked at Cisco, "Right before you started getting those dreams."

"Oh, you mean the ones where Wells uses his super-speeding hand to shred apart my heart?" Cisco sarcastically said. "Those?"

"Yes, right. So, what if they're not dreams?"

Now it was Caitlin giving him a look. "What else could they be?"

"Memories. What if, that day, Cisco found out that Wells is the Reverse-Flash, and then Wells killed him? But when I ran back a day, I changed the timeline so that event never happened."

"If it never happened, how can Cisco remember it?" Joe asked thoughtfully.

"Because I'm clearly special enough to remember my apparent death," Cisco had answered pretty glumly.

"Maybe we should try to expand on those memories then," Eddie hummed. Cisco's eyes snapped to him, appalled at the idea. "I'm just saying maybe there's something else in those memories that could help us figure out this mess."

"He's right," Barry finally spoke up, the thoughts of the alternate word consuming him for a moment. "We have to access Cisco's memories somehow. Somewhere in his subconscious is the key."

"The key to what now?" Cisco frowned, seeing the others begin to go with the idea.

"Getting my dad out of prison."

"And how are we going to do that?" Eddie inquired next.

"We're gonna get Wells to confess to killing my mom."

And the idea was born.

~0~

"Auntie Belén, what are we going to have for dinner?" Axel asked for the third time as he and Belén walked down the street. Well, Belén was carrying him on her hip and doing her best to not drop her bag with her laptop inside. She'd already taken an early day off work and had to pick up Axel from a babysitter Maritza used to have, since Mrs. Andrews wasn't going to be home today. That babysitter had been pretty upset Belén was late to pick up Axel.

"Um, I don't know yet," Belén felt awful keeping Axel like this but she was doing her best to pay all the bills now while maintaining a solid babysitter for Axel and doing her full hours at work.

Axel was interested in her hair, never noticing how quickly his aunt was going down the block. "I'm hungry."

"I know, sweetheart, I know," Belén shifted him a bit and nearly dropped her bag had it not been for a sudden gust of wind catching it.

"Barry!" Axel grinned at the meta who'd appeared in front of them. "Hi!"

Barry offered the boy a light smile before looking at Belén, who wasn't smiling back. She reached for her bag, which almost caused her to drop Axel.

"Let me help you," Barry said after helping her straighten up.

"I'm good, thanks," Belén said curtly and held her hand for the bag he still held onto.

"Bells, don't do that," Barry quietly spoke so that Axel wouldn't catch on they were having a rough moment. "Let me help you into the house."

"I don't need your help," Belén thought that was the biggest lie she ever said. She always needed his help.

"Auntie Belén, I'm hungry," Axel let his head rest against her shoulder. "When can we eat?"

A sigh slipped through Belén's lips. She met Barry's look and felt guilty for letting her nephew starve just for her problems with her boyfriend. She didn't have to say anything for Barry to know, so she moved around him and continued towards her house.

"Can we have macaroni and cheese?" Axel asked her but Belén honestly couldn't see herself cooking at the moment.

"How's about some pizza instead, hmm?" Belén walked down the front yard and up the steps to her door.

"With pepperoni and sausage!?" Axel's head popped up from her shoulder.

"Of course," Belén put him down to search for her keys. She patted her pockets for a minute but stopped when Barry leaned beside her and stuck her key into the door. She dropped her hands to her side and kept quiet as Barry opened the door for them.

Axel ran right in. "Can I call the pizza? I want to order it all by myself!"

Belén walked in after and searched for phone. Once again, Barry stepped in with her phone and bag. She couldn't help glower as she snatched both items. "Thank you," she said politely. "You can go."

"Bells, c'mon," Barry reached for her arm but she stepped away.

"As you can see, I don't have time to argue again," she spoke quietly while her eyes watched Axel go for his toys left on the couch. "As of late, I don't have a lot of time in general."

"Then let me help you," Barry motioned to himself. He vanished and reappeared in all of ten seconds holding two boxes of pizza in his hands.

"Aww, Barry, I wanted to order all by myself," Axel playfully stomped his feet towards the dining table.

"Sorry, Axel," Barry smiled at the boy then looked at Belén, gesturing to the pizza boxes in his hands. Belén crossed her arms and stepped aside so that he could leave the boxes on the table.

Barry put down the boxes of pizza on the table and gave Axel a plate. Axel eagerly opened up the top pizza box and crinkled his now. "Ew, why is there chicken on this pizza?"

"Because that's your auntie's favorite kind of pizza," Barry glanced at Belén, the woman shifting on her feet. "Pepperoni, chicken and ham."

"Eww," Axel promptly pushed the box away and reached for the second box.

"Bells?" Barry called the woman over but she refused to move from her spot.

"Can I get my juice?" Axel turned back on his chair to see Belén. He put his hands together and pouted. "I promise I won't spill."

Belén hated having both of their eyes burning on her so she sighed and let Axel go on. "Only one juice pouch."

"I only have one left," Axel's reminder that she hadn't even gone grocery shopping made her slap her hands over her face with a groan. She wasn't getting this at all.

"I'll go buy some soon, I promise," she dropped her hands and saw Barry coming up to her. "Look, thank you for the pizza, I'll pay you back-"

"-now you're just offending me," Barry said with a flat face. Belén rolled her eyes and shifted on her feet. "Belén, there are so many things going on right now that the last thing I want is to argue with the person I care about most. Really, I just want to hold you tight."

Belén looked up at him, and without saying it out loud, Barry knew she felt the same. "I'm so tired," she closed her eyes and slumped her shoulders.

"I know," Barry moved around her so that he could hold her from behind.

"Mrs. Andrews couldn't babysit today so I had to practically beg Maritza's last babysitter to watch him for today and she screamed at me because I was late picking him up," Belén started rambling and of course Barry let her go on until she'd need to breath. "And then I had to leave early from work so that I could pick him up so that was a fun conversation with our editor. On top of that Iris is asking me to ask the Flash about some information on my brother, Pixel, Plasticine and Azul-"

"Auntie Belén!" Axel came running out of the kitchen waving his juice pouch above his head. "I need more juice!"

Belén shut her eyes and let her head hang. "And I have to go grocery shopping because I'm starving my nephew."

Barry only slightly smiled behind her. He knew she was under excess stress and it killed him that he held the biggest stress bomb she'd hear. He tightened his grip around Belén and planted a kiss on her head. "You're doing the best you can and look, Axel's doing just fine."

Belén raised her head to see Axel wiggling his bottom on his chair. He took a big bite of his pizza and hummed despite having a good chunk of food in his mouth. He looked like any ordinary four year old having dinner.

"I can't do this forever," Belén admitted quietly. "I'm his aunt, I'm not...I'm not a mom. I don't know what to do when he cries at night. I definitely don't know what to do for dinner every night for a four year old. Me? I can make frozen food and I'm good to go but he...he's four. He needs nutrients and vitamins that I have never looked at." She paused to take in a deep breath and exhale. "I gotta find Maritza."

Barry closed his eyes for a moment, willing himself to speak up. "Bells..." his arms let her go, allowing her to turn around. "Maritza..."

Belén watched him struggle with his words that didn't even spell a coherent sentence. It concerned her, honestly, when she saw how much conflict she saw on his face. "Barry," she put a hand on his arm, essentially stopping him in the middle of a stutter. "This thing that...you can't get off your mind, is it about me?"

Barry pursed his lips together and gave a small nod. "Yeah..."

"It's not good, is it?"

"No...it's not."

"I don't like being kept in the dark of things, you know that, but if you're having that much trouble telling me...it has to be something really serious," Belén crossed her arms and did her best to not be so impulsive to get the information out of Barry. "I don't know what it is, but I really hope to know sometime this week."

That was fair, perhaps more fair than Barry deserved. He didn't know how, but he would tell her the truth by the end of the week. He had to. "I promise you I will."

Belén took that deal with a nod of her head. She turned back to Axel and saw he was covered in pizza sauce already. "I also discovered that I am not good at getting four year olds to take baths."

Barry laughed behind her. "That's every four year old, Bells."

Belén groaned. The more she thought about things, the worse she felt. Knowing this, Barry endeavored to distract her.

"Make a list of what you need for groceries," he left her and came back with a pen and notepad.

"Right, cos I'll forget," Belén figured and took the pen and notepad from him. She jotted down the things she remembered straight off the bat and when she kept pausing every so often, Barry started speeding through their kitchen.

Axel laughed from his seat. "Auntie Belén, what is Barry doing? Is he being silly?"

Before Belén could answer, she felt the pen and notepad disappear between her fingers. Barry came to a stop in front of her. "Uh, so you also needed Cinnamon Toast Crunch, definitely more apples, some bananas, a couple more pasta boxes - you guys eat a lot of pasta!" He threw her a look.

"We're Italian," Belén reminded him.

"Right."

"And spaghetti! I want spaghetti tomorrow!" Axel exclaimed.

"Gonna need more spaghetti," Barry said, pointing at Axel before jotting it down too. "Does that sound like it's everything?"

Belén nodded her head. "Yup. I guess I'll get up earlier tomorrow before work and-" But she stopped after being slapped in the face by Barry's trail of wind.

Barry returned a minute later with grocery bags but of course he put those away where he thought they belonged, since he never really went through their kitchen before. "Done!"

Belén raised her eyebrow at him, momentarily surprised but soon she started to smile. "Thank you," she walked up to him and hugged him tight.

Barry gave her a light sway and kissed her head. "Would you like to have some dinner?"

"Please," she chuckled.

~ 0 ~

The following night everyone save Eddie and Iris gathered in Barry's lab to conduct the memory goggle experiment. Caitlin had set up the controlling computer for the project while Cisco made himself comfortable on a small bed brought in for the occasion. It would, supposedly, allow Cisco to delve into the other world where his 'memories' were originating from.

"So, just for the people that don't speak geek-" Belén gestured between herself and Joe smiling innocently while the three scientists with them have her looks, "-how is this going to work exactly?"

"Yeah, Cisco is going to put the glasses on, fall asleep, and start dreaming," Caitlin simplified. "It's not that hard, actually."

Cisco scoffed as he took the goggles from her. "Yeah, except I'm pretty sure I die in this dream. If I go back into it, am I gonna die in real life? I mean, what are we talking about here? Is this Inception or Dreamscape?"

Joe held out a glass of milk for him. "Here. Drink this."

Cisco eyes said glass looking mildly offended. "What, am I five?"

"Just drink it."

Cisco sighed, figured why the hell not, and took the glass. "Okay, I'll drink it."

"You're gonna be fine, Cisco," Barry said as he took the now empty glass from him.

Cisco took I'm a deep breath as he placed the goggles on and laid down. Caitlin began to monitor. "Okay, the glasses are emitting a low-level delta wave which should help you fall asleep."

Cisco nodded. "Okay. I gotta warn you, though, usually it takes me a long time." But his slurred words betrayed him. "I mean... I'm not saying I'm, like... an insomniac or any…" he fell asleep mid sentence .

"Ah, so that's how you get him to shut up," Joe remarked, causing Belén to snicker.

"Now we know for when others start to ramble on and on," Barry ended up saying, and looked right at the ombre-blonde.

She gasped. "You'd do that to me?"

"If you keep insulting me," he shrugged.

"I'm so sorry," she said and kissed his cheek. "Better?" Barry nodded silently, although his smirk said it all.

"He's entering REM. It's working," Caitlin announced, sounding surprised her idea had worked.

Barry moved closer to speak with Cisco. "Cisco. Can you hear me? You're dreaming, bud."

Cisco suddenly spoke back, but his words were slow and dream-like. "Whoa. Guys, this is mad freaky."

"Okay, um, where are you?"

"Um, in the Cortex. I mean, I know I'm just dreaming that I'm in the Cortex, but it feels so real."

"Cisco, focus please," Belén said. "What exactly are you dreaming about?"

"Caitlin just left. I asked her to take Wells to Jitters."

Caitlin looked at the others in confusion. She had no recollection of such event.

"Why... why do you want Wells out of the lab?" Barry asked him.

"I think he might have tampered with my work. I need to check. Okay. Okay, I'm walking to the bunker." There was a moment of silence before Cisco sudddnly said, "Oh, man, I love this shirt. I thought the dryer ate it."

Joe had to laugh - the kid got distracted so easily!"

Belén, downing her own laugh, once again made sure Cisco focused.

"Okay, okay. All right. Now I'm running tests on the containment system. This data... It doesn't make any sense. All the supercapacitors... They were all still fully charged. There's absolutely no reason that the Man in Yellow should have escaped. Oh, my God. It was just a hologram. He tricked us."

Everyone now looked at each other stunned.

"Oh, God, Wells is here!"

"Cisco, it's just a dream. He can't hurt you," Caitlin reminded him.

"You better be right about that!"

"Eobard Thawne…" Cisco said, but it didn't sound like he was talking with them at the moment.

"Thawne? Like Eddie Thawne?" Joe asked, making the others think of the connection.

"You killed Nora Allen," Cisco continued.

"Nora? What about my mom?" Barry quickly asked.

"He's confessing," Cisco answered.

"Cisco?"

"He... he didn't want to kill her. It was you, Barry. He was trying to kill you."

Caitlin had gone back on the computer to read Cisco's vitals. "His blood pressure's 200 and his heart rate is 147. Guys, he's losing higher brain function. Cisco, you're gonna be okay. It's just a dream. You're gonna be okay."

But Cisco continued to grow in panic. "His hand... It's vibrating. He's gonna kill me! Oh, God!"

Caitlin went mad going between Cisco and the monitoring computer. "He's gonna have a stroke."

"Get him out of there!" Belén shouted frantically.

"Help me, please!" Cisco pleaded, still in his dream. Caitlin remained on the computer trying to get wake him up, eventually jolting him with a bit of a spark. "Aah!"

Caitlin gave him a sideways hug. "You're okay. It was just a dream. You're okay."

Cisco panted as he slowly came back to the real world. "Oh, God. It felt so real."

Barry felt his phone vibrate and picking it up he was greeted with Wells demanding where he was. Nervous, he couldn't come up with a right answer.

"A fire. A huge fire just erupted," Wells finally explained.

"A fire? Where?" Barry turned to the others, putting him on speaker so everyone else would hear.

"New Brighton. Bradford Tower High-Rise.c

Joe blinked. "I know that building. That's where Captain Singh's fiance works."

"On my way," Barry said, hanging up and speeding off

~ 0 ~

As it turned out, Wells was very good at keeping his charade of a kind man only wanting to help. He had helped Barry discover a new ability that enabled the metahuman to suck up all the fire in the site and save everyone. Things like this made Barry even more confused on Wells' intentions. Who goes through so much trouble to help the enemy just so that in the end he can kill the enemy?

Eobard Thawne, apparently - whoever that was.

That's exactly what Barry told Joe later that night when they returned home. If he didn't tell someone Barry was sure he'd go crazy. "We have to get him," he insisted, "I don't know how but we have to get him to confess." But then, another "bad idea" popped in his head. "He thinks of Cisco as a son, maybe.. maybe if we set everything up right, he'll genuinely let his guard down with."

Joe was on board with the idea, thinking for the moment it was the only one that would work. "Well, then we need to do a better job protecting him than I did protecting you."

Barry gave a tilt of his head, puzzled. "I'm not sure what that means."

"Barry, this is all because of me," Joe began, "I never should've let Wells take you from that hospital. None of this would've ever happened."

"If you hadn't let him take me, I would be dead, for sure," Barry argued back.

"But even then, I knew something wasn't right. Everything in my gut was telling me not to trust him, but I did, because I was so desperate to see you okay."

"Joe, this isn't your fault," Barry affirmed. "It's not your fault. Look, every bad thing that has happened to us - to all of us - is because of him. And now he's gonna pay for it."

At that moment, the front door opened and Iris walked in, hearing the last of the words. "Who's gonna pay?" she asked distractedly while closing the door behind her.

Quickly glancing at each other, the two men devised a simple, yet plausible, excuse.

"Just a new criminal we're trying to catch," Barry said.

"Oh, hope you do then," Iris said, heading for the staircase.

"What are you doing here anyways?" Barry asked her, catching Joe giving him the warning to keep everything quiet. He headed out himself afterwards.

"Oh, I was going to stay over at Belén's tonight but I realized I forgot some of the things we use over here."

"Like what?"

"Girl stuff," Iris laughed. "Not sure you're actually interested in that, are you?"

"You caught me," Barry mocked defeat and began making his way to the staircase himself when Iris stopped him.

"You are a very bad boyfriend, though," she pointed at him, her accusation filled with purposeful exaggeration but still managing to get Barry worried.

"Why?" He frowned. Although then he started making up a list that could give more than sufficient reasons to back up Iris' statement.

But of course, Iris knew none of those and came out with something different. "You are supposed to be over there, not me!" She playfully hit him on the arm. "What kind of boyfriend doesn't stay with his girlfriend who recently started living all alone?"

"The...kind that hasn't been invited yet?" was Barry's answer, and he thought it was a good one.

Iris rolled her eyes at him. "You are so new at this."

"Walk me through it oh great one," Barry sarcastically waited for her.

Iris tried her best not to smack him for that and just continued to explain. "It's a big house and she's lonely there. I'm not saying stay every night but a couple times just to show her she isn't alone would suffice."

"That...makes some sense…" Barry said after thinking on it. "But, I mean, we haven't been dating for so long. Wouldn't it be kinda weird?"

"Only if you make it weird," Iris answered in a tone that implied it should be obvious. "This is your problem: you overthink everything. This isn't science. You don't have to stay in her room on her bed, hell you don't even need to spend the night there, just...wait till she falls asleep, wait until she's at peace and can sleep for the night."

"Yeah, I can do that," Barry nodded, moving to leave again when Iris stopped him.

"But for tonight, she's mine," she smiled cheekily and finally started up the stairs.

"What - hey!" Barry called after her.

"You snooze you lose! It's my night!"

"Unbelievable," Barry was left to mumble downstairs, resigning to a night without his Bells.

~0~

The next day, everyone was set in the bunker room where the old trap for the Reverse Flash was meant to be caught. Caitlin and Belén were the last to walk in, and the latter carried a red folder with a rather serious face.

"We just talked to Dr. Wells. He's attending a lecture downtown, won't be back until 5:00," Caitlin informed them.

"All right, Cisco, you know when he gets here you need to be working on the trap so he sees you set off the hologram," Barry said.

"Hold on, isn't that, in your dream, when everything went all…"

Cisco cut Joe off by making a rather shaking gesture with his hand, meant to hold something. "Kali Maaa Temple of Doom. Yeah, that definitely happened."

"Please tell me your super intelligence figured out a way around it?" Belén gave him a weary face.

Cisco smirked and nodded. "I'm ready for him." He turned and made it into the trap. "I originally designed the force field to keep a speedster from getting out. But I've reversed it. Now it won't let one in." Holding a small remote-like device, he pressed a button and made a reddish forcefield build around the trap then becoming invisible. He gestured Barry with an index finger to try it out.

Barry cringed internally as he prepared to take a whack from the barrier. "Back up," he warned the others as he got into position. Taking a deep breath, he ran straight for the trap...and was repelled strongly. He crashed into a metal, wheeling, table and landed on his side over the ground.

Belén rushed over to him. "Barry, are you okay?"

The metahuman turned on his back, eyes wide and blinking fast as he came back to normal. "Ah. It works…"

"Does it make me a bad girlfriend if I wanna laugh?" asked the struggling woman as she helped him sit upright.

"Absolutely," Barry sent her a face.

"Good thing I don't wanna then…" Belén looked away holding back the biggest laugh possible.

"Okay, as long as I'm inside, Wells won't be able to get near me," Cisco said as he stepped out of the trap.

"And Bells and I will be in the Cortex watching and recording everything that happens," Caitlin glanced at the woman to see if she was still coming with her.

"Yes," Belén turned around, setting lose part of her smile.

"And as soon as we get the confession we need to free my dad, I'm moving in," Barry said afterwards.

"So what do I do?" Eddie asked, looking at him for further instructions.

"Wells also threatened Iris, so if something goes wrong here, we need you to keep an eye on her until Wells is neutralized," it was Joe who had answered, and despite their problems Eddie took it seriously.

"I'll always keep Iris safe, Joe," he said in a low mutter and walked out of the room.

Confused, Joe looked at the others and was met with a sharp look from Barry. "What?"

"Come here," Barry nodded for Joe to follow. The two made it into the corridor where they could talk freely. "So, um, Eddie told me what happened, that you kiboshed his proposal."

Joe sighed. "That was supposed to be between him and me."

"I so agree with that. But I'm also curious," Barry admitted. "Eddie is a great guy and we both know he really cares for Iris-"

"I know that," Joe cut him off to agree, but it only confused Barry even more.

"Then why did you tell him no?"

"Because right now is just not the moment," Joe said as if it should have been obvious. "Wells is out there, looking for advantages, and if he knows about this...what do you think he's going to use against Eddie? Against us all?"

"Stopping them from getting married won't keep Iris anymore safe or put her in anymore danger," Barry clarified. "In fact, if anything, it'll just hurt Iris more to know if you don't agree to this."

Out of everything, Joe knew Barry was right.

~ 0 ~

"Everything's set," Caitlin announced after turning one of the computers off for when Dr. Wells returned.

"Positions, everyone," Cisco took in a shaky breath as he started leaving the cortex.

"Uh, Barry, wait," Belén grabbed the red folder she had originally brought with her and caught up with said metahuman just outside the cortex.

"Bells, we gotta-"

"Just one moment, please, it's important," she promised, gesturing to the folder. "It's about Iris."

"Wh-what's wrong with her?" Barry dreaded. For someone who didn't know anything about metahumans Iris seemed to get into trouble most!

"Last night she slept over at my place-"

"I know," Barry said, still disappointed Iris had beat him to it.

"She tricked me, Barry, she tricked me into getting information on metahumans to create this," Belén handed him the red folder for him to get a look himself. "She's created this entire profile - a good case - about a conspiracy of the Particle Accelerator and STAR Labs."

As Barry began going through Iris' work he began to see the numerous cases of metahumans that had attacked the city throughout the year.

"She's connected dots. She knows that whatever was released into the atmosphere the night of the Accelerator was the night everything strange started. She knows how metahumans got their powers."

"U-uh…" truly Barry could not come up with any coherent words at the moment.

"She thinks STAR Labs knows about this," Belén finished with a sigh. "And she's pretty convinced this is how the Flash and the Azalea got their powers. Worst part is : she wants to publish it."

And that's when Barry realized the problem. With eyes wide, he looked up to her concerned face. "We can't let her do that…"

"I know but it's a bit difficult shooting it down without making myself look suspicious," Belén pointed out. "She says this is what happened to my brother too. I only managed to get her to let me see all this but she's going to show you next - she's looking for the scientific perspective."

"Oh great, so now I have to shoot her down," mumbled Barry.

"Not shoot down but...maybe tell her it's all wrong?"

"I mean...I guess I could come up with some sort of story…" Barry sighed and closed the folder, already beginning to come up with bits of a good excuse.

"Oh thank you," Belén took back the folder, promising to keep it safe. "Knew you'd come up with something."

"I'll look into that tonight, promise," Barry assured. "Now I really gotta go," he planted a kiss on her head and rushed to get into position.

Belén turned to do the same in the cortex room.

~ 0 ~

Just as planned, Dr. Wells had returned about an hour after five and had gone first into the cortex room where Caitlin and Belén were - discussing Belén's current article. Upon asking for Cisco, he was directed for the Bunker room on account of Cisco 'finally figuring out what went wrong with their trap for the Reverse Trap'. Wells was out of there within the next minute.

When Cisco met with Wells, he no longer donned his glasses nor wheelchair.

"You're him," Cisco began the play, "The Reverse-Flash. Joe was right this whole time, wasn't he?"

Wells condescendingly laughed. "Good ol' Joe. Joe West had his doubts all along. Even from that first night in the hospital, Joe knew something wasn't right. Cops... as inconvenient now as they will be in a hundred years."

"You killed Barry's mother. I want to know why," Cisco demanded, knowing that was what Barry was waiting for - the confession that would set his father free.

Wells moved towards the man, cleverly explaining, "It was never my intention to kill Nora. But from my perspective, she was already dead. It just happened sooner than it was supposed to."

Barry looked at Joe helplessly after that 'confession' but Joe shook his head, whispering. "No. That's not an admission."

"You're not gonna get away with this," Cisco warned Wells, but it didn't look like his words affected Wells in anyway.

"I'm not gonna get away with it?" he instead walked for Cisco but as soon as he was an inch from the trap Cisco activated the force-field. "Oh, you're smart. You're smart, Cisco. But you're not that smart."

Cisco's smug face faded the moment Wells took step into the trap.

Wells raised a hand meant to strike Cisco the same way that he had killed Cisco in the alternative timeline. Cisco stumbled back but the man was nearing him. Joe rose from his hiding spot with Barry, quickly shooting Wells with three bullets.

"No!" Barry panicked and sped to catch the bullets, but was only able to catch two of the three. The last one struck Wells right on the chest. "He didn't confess," Barry ran a hand through his hair as they stared down at Wells on the floor.

"Cisco!" they heard Caitlin and Belén running into the room. The two made their way towards the trap.

"Are you okay?" Caitlin asked their affected friend.

Cisco couldn't stop staring at the now-dead Wells. "Yeah. I'm never ever gonna sleep ever again, but, yeah, I'm okay."

"Tylenol works," Belén distractedly said, the corpse of the man who killed her father taking it all away.

"He's dead. He didn't confess. Joe, this was it," Barry felt an overwhelming helplessness fill him up. "My dad's gonna be in prison forever."

"Barry, I'm sorry," Joe profoundly apologized to him.

But then Belén yelped. "Oh my god - what is that?"

They all stared as 'Wells' corpse reverted back to that of the metahuman Hannibal Bates, without a face.

"I told you this before-" the real Wells spoke over the speakerphones of the room, "-I am always one step ahead...Flash. Allow me to reintroduce to you Mr. Hannibal Bates and his incredible ability to transform into any person he touches. I knew that ability would come in handy. I did not expect it to come in handy this soon."

"You used him! Like you used all of us!" Barry shouted angrily, wishing the man would be there facing him.

"Well, he served a purpose. Didn't take much convincing. Just the simple promise of his freedom."

"You ruined my life! All our lives!"

"We stood by you after everything that happened," added Caitlin, pretty much matching everyone else's anger.

"I can see how this must be difficult for you to understand, but trust me, your lives now are so much better because of what I have done for you," Wells had the audacity to tell the group.

There, Belén had to speak up, full of anger herself. "You're saying that my life got better because you murdered my dad?"

"That was another accident," Wells revealed, fueling her up even more. "But what's one more alteration to the timeline?"

Belén raised a hand to her mouth, it was something else to hear that her father had - originally - supposed to live longer. She'd been robbed - her father been robbed of his life because someone greedy had an "accident".

"Though I have to say I was never anticipating to create an evil version of Plasticine," Wells' words caught everyone's attention. "I guess I interfered too much with Maritza's timeline as well."

"What?" Belén immediately looked to the others to see their reactions. Seeing that no one, not even Barry, wanted to look her in the eye pretty much summed up that she was the only one out of the loop - well, her, Joe and Eddie.

"You want to kill me, go ahead. I'm not gonna fight you," Barry's words made Belén snap back to the present. "But just tell the police what you did. Get my dad out of prison!"

"I don't want to kill you, Barry. I need you," Wells corrected. "And…I also did not anticipate, as difficult as the past 15 years have been for me, how much I would come to love working with you. With all of you. And yet, that does not change what needs to happen."

"Then face me now!" Barry ordered in a loud shout.

"Oh, we will face each other again. I promise you. Soon. Very, very soon."

Cisco's phone vibrated with a new alert. "He's in the time vault!"

Barry wasted no time and sped out of the room, ignoring his friends' calls for him. He came into the time vault but only saw the empty costume display and Wells' wheelchair. What he did come across, however, was a wide panorama of various hidden cameras set all over his friends' environments. There was one of his lab at work, many in STAR Labs, some at Joe's, some even at Belén's home and work. But the one that stood out was that of Eddie's place.

"Oh my God, Iris," he soon realized she was the only one left out of the loop and thus the easiest to get to. Wells hurt everyone and Iris was the last one to deeply affect.

Everyone had relocated to the cortex when Barry returned.

"We have to find Iris," he told them.

"Why?" Joe asked, already alarmed.

"Wells. He's been watching all of us. He has surveillance footage set up everywhere. Our homes, my lab at the police station, Central City Picture News."

"Barry," Belén was scowling at him, of course furious with him and everyone else. "We're gonna need-"

"I'm sorry, I tried," Barry said before disappearing with a call to Cisco to get him the location of Iris and Eddie.

~ 0 ~

Just as Barry had feared, Wells had indeed gone after the out-of-the-loop person of the group. Eddie of course couldn't help with just one gun and was easily thrown to the side of the bridge they stood over.

Iris recognized perfectly the man in yellow but was frozen to her spot. "I know who you are. You killed Barry's mom. But you don't have to hurt anyone else."

But without saying a word, Wells raised a vibrating hand as he neared her. Iris' had never felt her heart beat so fast. Thankfully, Wells realized in time someone was coming and so left the place, but not without taking Eddie.

"Eddie!" Iris fell forwards in her shout but was kept sustained as Barry arrived.

"Hey, Iris. It's okay. It's me," Barry spoke through a modulated voice and with a blurred face.

"He took him. The Man in Yellow, he took Eddie-" Iris frantically tried explaining to him, thinking maybe he could catch up and find Eddie.

"I promise I will find him, okay?"

In tears, Iris stopped moving and looked at him. "What is happening?"

"Don't say anything to anyone. I swear to you, I will bring him back, all right?"

Iris saw that as he was going to leave her and reached for his hand, only to feel a struck of small electricity between her fingers and his when he sped off. And she remembered one person who had given off the same feeling long ago. But that had to be impossible, because...because, well...he would...he would have told her…

"Barry?" she was left to wonder on the bridge.

~ 0 ~

The night was of a full defeat in all aspects. To learn that for a year you had been played was something indescribable. But now to know that not only had her twin brother gone dark, but her older sister too.

Betrayal came nowhere close to describing what Belén felt.

She sat on the couch holding one of her favorite photographs of her family and just...released her feelings. Axel had been put to sleep upstairs so she was free to cry as she pleased. She wondered where her body could produce so much water honestly, but it wouldn't stop. She looked at her family, her brother who had meant to be with her still. Her brother who wasn't supposed to get powers; her sister who wasn't meant to lose her husband. They were supposed to be there at home with her.

But Eobard had ruined that.

Maritza had meant to be living with her husband, Christopher, with Axel. Hell, maybe she would have even had their second child by now. She knew Maritza always wanted two kids, Chris had wanted the same.

But Eobard had ruined that.

And then her father. Her father, the true accident, had meant to grown older. He was supposed to be working at his beloved job. He was meant to be there for her, for greatest milestones. Now there wasn't even anyone to walk her down an aisle in years to come. She knew that was one of his desires. He had done it for Maritza and always talked about the day his littlest girl would one day marry and move out

Eobard ruined that as well.

And then there was her. She was never meant to have all these losses. She wasn't meant to be living alone with her nephew, wondering where the hell her sister was. She was meant to be a journalist who danced on the side. She was meant to be normal. But now there she was, crying her grief in a silent, lonely home.

Thanks to Eobard.

The faint knock on her door brought her no surprise. She got up, leaving the family portrait on the couch as she walked up to the door. She reached to open it, knowing exactly who was on the other side, but was reluctant.

"Bells, please open up," Barry quietly called from the other side. "We have to talk."

"Now?" she couldn't help the sourness in her voice. "Now you want to talk?"

There was a brief silence but Barry willed himself to talk. She deserved far more than what he gave her. "I tried to tell you, but...but I couldn't find the right way."

Belén leaned against the door, closing her eyes as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. She had thought about it, honestly, about the way Barry had been acting as of late. It made sense knowing what he knew about Maritza.

"It's my fault everyone's suffering. This Thawne man came after me and he ended up screwing up so many lives to get what he wanted from me. Look what he did to Caitlin and Ronnie? To the real Harrison Wells? And look at what he did to you. He hurt you and then he made me hurt you. Maybe it would've been better if Iris never introduced us, that way you wouldn't be here now."

Belén leaned away from the door and turned around to open it. She met Barry's overwhelmingly guilt-riddened face. "I would never regret meeting you," she said quietly.

"I ruined your family like he ruined mine. And you deserve better," Barry felt like that was the plain truth and it broke his heart.

"Thawne ruined our lives, Barry, not you," Belén cleared from tears from her face. "You should have told me about Maritza the moment you learned about it."

"I know-"

"-but I can understand it was a difficult thing to do," Belén said, honestly meaning it. If roles were reversed, she would have debated and kept quiet too. "But you-" she reached for both his hands and pulled him inside the house, "-are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and if it weren't for you, I would have cracked ages ago. You are the reason I stand here today, the reason I wanna help people. Because of you, I am who I am. We are not going to let Thawne get away with everything that he took away from us. We deserve better, and we're going to make sure we get what we deserve."

Barry nodded and pulled her into a much needed, tight hug.

#arrowverseocs #ocappreciation #barry allen #the flash #barry allen fics #the flash fics #barry allen imagines #the flash imagines #arrowverse fics #oc: Belén Palayta #oc: Belen Palayta #fic: it had to be you

[migleefulmoments]

Once again, ccers have labeled some of their favorite fairytale tropes as indisputable facts.

Cassie: 

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Anonymous asked:  Okay I’m trying to figure out why people believe C/C is a thing. Not saying you are wrong, I just have 0 context to go on and you seem to have an interesting outlook. Would you mind telling me the background to this? Or why people believe D is in the closet? (Also I’m curious why nobody uses their names and instead letters).

Cassie: Nonnie, that’s a tall order. There’s SO much that absolutely indicates M is a beard and CC is most definitely real (not true. There is NOTHING to prove Mia is a beard or that cc is real).  Not the least of which is the absolute adoration on D’s face whenever he looks at or talk about C. (Wait, so your biggest and best evidence is that Darren looks at Chris with love and adoration? That isn’t proof of anything except for your own bias, your Harlequin Romance ideas about love and that you don’t understand what constitutes “proof”).  I’ve never once seen him look at M that way and usually when he is forced to speak about her, he does it in an almost offhand way and I don’t think it’s EVER in a complimentary way (”Ever” was her typo. This statement is not only NOT proof of a relationship but it isn’t even untrue. The cc fandom picks and chooses the evidence that confirms their bias and proves their point. Darren has looked at Mia with love and adoration and has said sweet things to her.  He also married her which trumps all of the goo-goo eyes they imagine he’s given Chris over the years). He’s said she’s a big girl when told people were bullying her, referred to her as a ball and chain (NO he referred o himself as a “ball and chain”), and frankly, he treats her badly (NOT TRUE. If it was true I don’t understand what you guys even like about him.  A man who treats his wife badly is a dick). He’s repeatedly slammed car doors in her face, walks as far ahead of her as he can, (Both of those scenarios were to avoid paparazzi photos of them together. It’s impossible for us to understand what it is like to have people taking our picture and making up stories about us so we can't compare this behavior to our lives.) got in the car for the sham mockery and left her to fend for herself in that monstrosity she called a wedding gown to try and get into the car (Yes, that is what all grooms do.  That is why the bride has attendants), and shook her hand at one of the first big events they attended after they had supposedly been dating for over a year (This is another flat out lie. As I debunked- Mia and Darren were photographed standing together before the red carpet and he introduced her as his girlfriend to another person standing near them. See what I mean they pick and choose to prove their point even if it means lying)   Contrast that with how reverently he speaks about C and how conscious he always seemed to be when they were in public together and there’s no contest (He tells the exact same story every time. Wonder why?)  The love sick puppy with his whole face lit up like a Christmas tree appears whenever C is mentioned (What are you 12? Nobody who is over the age of 12 and mentally sound believes that puppy dog eyes are proof of a relationship).  Paying attention to background moments is important (In other words slow it down, gif it, add music, repeat lies and notice the small stuff while ignoring the big stuff and maybe you can find cc in all the proof that Darren and Mia are happily married. Hear with your eyes because you will never find cc if you don’t). you will never If you need more, I suggest going through some of the bigger CC blogs and reading them.

As to why we use their initials and not their names means it doesn’t appear when their names are searched.

Anonymous asked: Okay more questions! Didn’t M and D start dating before G/lee? During their college years too right? And I assumed it was to avoid it being searched but it it for reasons? Maybe to avoid rude fans that disagree?

Cassie: Nonnie, if you believe the current version they are spinning, they met pre G/lee, as for when they started “dating,” well, it’s changed so many times I’ve lost track. I think the latest is 2011, but I’m not sure. (There are photos o them lying on next to each other one what is clearly a date with Darren’s pre-Blaine haircut so they have been dating since early- to mid-2010)  They tried to say before G/lee, but D blew that outta the water when he said he had never been committed to anything as long as he had G/lee during one of the interviews he did near when it ended (It is not rational to throw away all of the evidence that they dated before Glee- photos, comments from Darren and MIa and from friends in exchange for one offhand comment he gave to a reporter. This is a perfect example of how the fandom uses confirmation bias t  guide their beliefs)   Honestly, if anyone can keep the ever changing timeline in order, they deserve a reward. D sure as hell can’t. (Just because Darren isn’t. sharing dates with the fandom doesn’t mean he doesn’t know. This is a silly analogy Cassie if one of your students used this type of argument, I know you would shut it down)   They went to college in different parts of the country and M is older than D. 

I could give two shits less about fans that disagree. I don’t use their names in case THEY (or D’s collection of dumbasses that make up his team) search things here (Wait, so you hide the names so that if Darren’s team can’t find it but Abby has said many times that Darren reads your blogs daily and his team does as well? They even change their plans based on what you say.  This is confusing Cassie). The “fans” that don’t agree see everything we post, as they incessantly stalk our blogs and respond directly to what we say. I stopped bothering to see what they were saying a LONG time ago. It’s always the same old crap. But hey, hope they enjoy spending all their time writing epic posts about my fandom that get three notes, maybe four (You should DEFINITELY read my blog, it would keep you from making a fool of yourself believing something that is so obviously untrue because you would see could read about how your “proof” is all untrue. I have debunked the majority of the cc lexicon and  provided evidence to back me up) 

Hi is it okay if you could tell me when WS came into C’s life as a person who’s seen more than a friend? Like when and how long before the hand holding crap. I have no motive or am trying to start any fight, I am just really curious.

Cassie: To the best of my knowledge W first appeared with C in December 2011. (Wrong December 2012) The super awkward hand holding was June 2013, on the 12th, if memory serves. (Sure, I will beleive you) The day D was confirming M as the ball and chain. Never forget that France has super strict paparazzi laws to protect celebs. Everything released has to be with approval, unless something has changed. (We have photographic proof that Chris sat on Will’s lab at Naya’s party 12/7/12. We have a pic of Will kissing Chris at Coachella 4/13. The fact that you believe it happened on “confirmation day” is only because that is what Abby repeats but it isn’t true)

Anonymous asked: Thank you for responding to my WS question, so that means the tame bearding started when C said that stuttering thing implying there’s someone on An/dy’s show. Not surprising tbh. Kinda sad CC literally had to hide from like day 1, hope they won’t have to one day.

cassie1022 answered: Nonnie, you’re exactly correct about when it started with C. He definitely didn’t mean W when he made that comment on AC’s show. It is sad that they’ve had to hide for so long, but I’m hopeful that won’t always be the case. (The Andy Cohen interview was on April 2014. How in the hell Cassie can agree that the “bearding” was tame after that interview when we have Chris on Will’s lap 12/7/12 and a kiss in April 2013 at Coachella. Darren and Mia had been dating for at least 4 years by the time Chris did this interview It’s ridiculous that you can claim that it “definitely wasn't Will” The truth is you have no insight into who Chris was speaking of and all evidence points to Will.  Stop living in your imagination).  

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Whenever i see anything m related…Anon

ajw720 Hi nonnie, I am not posting your ask because i can already see the hate coming my way, but i need to make a comment. M’s job is to beard for D, her job, for which she is compensated well. Part of that job is to hide his sexuality. And as part of it, she is supposed to enhance his public image, it is literally her job to look good on his arm and to not embarrass him. (Abby, you know that you have no proof of this and to surmise that “It is literally Mia’s job to look good on his arm and to not embarrass him” is you once again embellishing your own fabricated stories about a man and woman you know nothing about.  It’s really not healthy for you to be living this deep inside your fantasy.  You are getting too specific Your theory that Mia is simply Darren’s arm candy and nothing more proves that YOU have no idea what a feminism is). 

And frankly, aside from her deluded stans, she does the complete opposite, constantly and all the time. It is not badass to vomit on stage and boast about it.  It is not woke or feminist to have offensive, derogatory, and misogynistic themes and decor at a bar she owns and that D is publicly attached to, I would imagine it is against the CA health code to have naked women gyrating on the bar where they serve drinks. (You would imagine? Come on Abby, you're a lawyer, you know you're full of shit. They weren’t naked and people step on the bar all the time. I have never seen you rage about that. You have no understanding of what “woke’ is or what feminists believe.)    It isn’t cool to wear a boob shirt to a professional event your public partner created that is marketed as family-friendly (Are you scared of boobs Abby? You have been to Elsie and it isn’t full of 2 yo’s. Darren has a potty mouth at Elise and I’ve never seen you be upset that his mouth isn’t family-friendly)   It is completely insensitive to be mad that a young man tragically died because it interfered with her interview (This is so overblown.  That wasn’t what she was doing and it’s time you stop using this to rally your troops, it’s a low blow and it isn’ true).  It is frankly criminal in my opinion to raise money from fans and then not use it for the stated cause (another untrue “fact” you keep repeating.  The money was for the project they completed).  And I could go on all day (yes becuase you’ve made most of them up yourself).  She is harmful to his image and becomes increasingly more so every day (This is untrue- she is his wife and Darren is about to have his best professional period in the next 6 months.  I have never seen one bad work about MIa that wasn’t directly tied to the cc fandom, in other words, nobody outside the fandom dislikes Mia and she isn’t negatively impacting his image.  Their wedding was extensively written about and on several best wedding lists without one bad word about Mia which also proves she isn’t hurting his image. You have also been saying this since 2015= of it got worse every day it would be 1,825x worse than when you first mentioned it)  And any team that cared about their client would have removed him from the situation years ago.  And if they needed him to be straight, get him a beard with ambition beyond being a beard.   

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Anonymous asked: What happened with Mia, why everyone hates her? I'm new at this :(

chrisdarebashfulsmiles answered: A/non this is a long story. A lot of us tried to ignore her as much as possible for years (Bwahahahah the lack of self-image is overwhelming)  You of course already know that she’s a beard ( honestly not an opinion but a fact proven by a lot of things, public and not (NOT TRUE) - let’s talk about her living with her real bf “and D” for example) (Again I have disproved this trope, They don’t even comprehend that Ben has a live-in girlfriend and has been with her for a while now) and this wouldn’t have been a problem if she wasn’t the daughter of a powerful couple (jealous much? This wouldn’t be a problem if her parents weren't rich? WTF?)) and she was kind enough to truly love other people than herself (This trope is so untrue. Mia’s friends adore her and comment on how great she is.)   Because in that case she would have been a perfect beard and a wonderful friend for D. (It’s hilarious that she believes this is a valid argument) But unfortunately for D mostly the reality is way different (and yet Darren has never made one comment that suggests Mia is a beard, he is with Chris - in fact they have both denied they were in a relationship- or that he’s unhappy. This trope is 100% cc fabricated).

I can say to you, while suggesting to keep an eye for some posts about her here, that we have public video and post reporting how much awful she could be with D and his fans (I’m curious about this-anybody know what she is talking about?)  Or we wanna talk also about her fans? With the excuse of going full bearding following D everywhere every time ( obviously she talked about grueling work and heavy travel schedule in 2015) she and his group stole the money asked with a fundraising for a new video. And don’t forget: She’s rich AF. (Again, so jealous that her parents are rich-her parent’s money is not her money. She’s an adult. She didn’t steal the money for the video-they made the video Gorilla.  I’m going to write another post about this lie) 

Our despising is mostly related to the shit she does to D, tho.(Which the cc fandom has completely fabricated.  How would they have any info on what she. does to Darren? He’s never said one negative word about MIa) 

leka-1998 It’s been 2 years since they forced the encagement. Almost 1 year since the sham mockery and not even 1 month since everyone and their mother included it in their 2019 recap (Leka morphing into Abby.  As for posting -that is what friends and loved ones do. However, most of the “Recaps” were Top 9′s on Instagram and people don’t choose those pics, they are literally the TOP 9 liked posts of the year). And would you look at what’s happening, there are still people coming here wondering if something’s wrong.(Not a logical conclusion, they are reading your lies and then coming for answers) 

Archives here are a good place to start. Let me just say one thing. She’s mocked Cor/y’s death because an interview had to be rescheduled and she was not happy about it. She’s an all around bad person and the complete opposite of what D stands for. (And what exactly does Darren stand for? IT seems to me that he loves his wife and their life. His potty mouth and love of sex puns fit nicely with her).

Anonymous asked: Not the same anon, but for someone rich, M dresses really really badly. You would think rich people could dress themselves especially since they can actually afford a stylist lmao

chrisdarebashfulsmiles answered: I’m for the people right of choice of wear whatever they want tbh, anon (I stand for freedom of choice except if you are Mia....then I can trash everything about you).   Sometimes she is dressed by AW, sometimes by Lu/lu. The point is that most of the time she chooses the wrong dress alone because of her desire to be a ‘90 badass woman 20 years late. Something that I can understand because of my age but I also have to say that if you have to walk on a red carpet… You need to do it in the right way. She seems unable to understand this fact.(Everyone is free to be you and me except Mia who has to follow the patriarchal rules set forth by society 100 years ago: women are to be seen and not heard, should look pretty but be modest because it’s her responsibility to make sure men do not get boners when looking at her.She is supposed to wear new dresses according to Abby and they should be designer so as to look at Darren’s level. She has to look beautiful as defined by the ccers’ beauty standards or she is a labeled a bad person whom they are then free to bully).   

#crisscolfer #crisscolfer lol #darren criss #ccer #mia criss #Ccers keep lying #Debunking cc lies #claiming their fairytales are facts #facts

[szopenhauer]

Who would you rather have sex with: Prince or Billy Idol?:  neither because I’m an asexual and I’m into women exclusively but elseway they’re both ok, probably would choose Prince though

Have you ever read any of the Chronicles of Narnia series?: at least one book Do you hate Harry Potter as much as I do?: I don’t hate him but I’m afraid of it as whenever I watched a movie smth really bad was happening to my dad - 6 times - coincindence? I think not... anyway I don’t shove my traumas into other people’s throats, I usually swallow without complaining, sometimes even mentioning that I have a problem with something, I might not only close my eyes but send you stuff about this or that I dislike if you’re a fan because I care more about others than myself *shrug* How many times have you seen the SW movies?: uh oh  What is your favorite anime?: I’m not into anime but I watched Ghibli, I also have sentiment towards Sailor Moon, FMA, Nana, Kuroshitsuji and Minami-ke 

Do you write it as “favorite” or “favourite”?: fav :P or favorite Do you believe in the Zodiac somewhat?: somewhat ;) Can you use a hula hoop?: I can use it on my arm, a bit on my leg, not on my stomach (actually better on my neck than belly) What is the longest distance you’ve ever walked?: pilgrimage when I was still in middle school How long do you think you could do jumping jacks non-stop?: dunno, not as long as I used to  What do you usually use your tokens on at the arcade?: I haven’t been to an arcade yet in my whole life so... What do you think of eyeball jewelry?: yuk What’s better: glitter or rhinestones? glitter Do you like taking pictures of yourself?: prefer selfies over being photographed, I can choose the angle and stuff like this, I take pics until I’m satisfied then delete the rest... Do you like making sandcastles at the beach?: why not Did you have streamers in the handlebars of your bike?: nie, tylko te kuleczki na szprychach, które wydawały taki specyficzny dźwięk podczas jazdy jak się przesuwały, teraz mam podobne na hulajnodze, ale one są stałe, mam też klakson i chciałabym koszyk ze sztucznymi kwiatami dokupić oraz wiatraczek - wiem, dziecinne, ale mam to w dupie - i tak rzadko jeżdżę, mam problemy z kolanem i wolałam to niż rower chociaż czasem tęsknię za siodełkiem, oba jednak ciężko obsługiwać będąc chronicznie chorym człowiekiem (serce i brzuch głównie), może kiedyś nazbieram na skuter  Would you put streamers on your bike now?: maybe How do you like your hamburger?: I really liked those with huge amount of vegetables  If you were able to sell your soul to someone, how much would you charge? What would you buy with the money?: no way! Do you like to be tickled?: I hate to be tickled Does tickling turn you on?: wtf

Did you watch the Power Rangers when you were little?: I don’t think so, Sebastian made me watch all openings once, I think Power Rangers had pretty interesting villains tho Are you good at playing ping-pong?: I wasn’t the worst Do you like to chew on things?: nah

Have you ever freaked out because you noticed your shadow once, in the forest, my dad laughed his ass off  *raz też miałam wstążki we włosach i wiatr je powiał na moją twarz, znów się tata śmiał ze mnie, było mi mega głupio ^^”

Do you get out of bed on the left side or right side:: left *co oznacza, że zawsze wstaję lewą nogą, coś w tym jest skoro moje dzieciństwo było szczęśliwsze, a wówczas wstawałam na prawo hmm...

Do you stare into the mirror when you brush your teeth meh How many different couches did you sit on today 0-1 You just won a free TV series on DVD. What is it Buffy or Call the midwife if not animated, could also ask for Stranger things because I meant to finish it with my father Do you really search for the cold side of the pillow at times I guess If a stranger looked at your signature, could he pronounce your name doubt it, my writing’s a mess

When you sleep next to someone to you do you face towards them or away away if I don’t trust you enough or am ashamed but I roll/kick so I might wake up in a different position  Do you look into the bottom of the cup when drinking from a cup often Do you fall asleep with your mouth open or closed drooling with my mouth open happens every now and then but I try to keep my mouth closed

Do you tend to use “…”  as you can see

What was the last item or location you cleaned just washed the knife Do you make up words when you’re singing and don’t know the lyrics guilty

Do you own an engagement ring? nope

check your shirt’s tag; where was it made? India is there a book you keep telling yourself you’ll read but still haven’t? yep

did your family ever own a vacation home? we’re poor my brother won’t travel places with a language barrier; would you mind it? not that I want to travel but if they don’t know english - I’m definitely not going  do you like watching music videos? love but not the dancing/playing instruments types

are you into philosophy? kinda have you been inside of a police station? I realized I’ve never been there woah are there any flags flying outside at your home? not rn where do you hide things that you don’t want whoever you live with to find? there’s no such place tbh as my mom would find everything if she wanted to and usually she just doesn’t care about personal space or anything like that why aren’t you outside right now? fuck off do you mind drinking room-temperature water? I don’t mind do you think covers of songs usually ruin the originals? mhm

What kinds of advertisements are on this page right now? they’re blocked Has something really heavy ever fallen on you? I don’t recall

Are there any empty plates or cups in the room you are in? mug If you wear makeup, what colors do you usually wear? black If you spelled your name backward, would it be easy to pronounce? very easy If you have more than one pet, do they ever get jealous of each other? my dog was jelly  If you are taking this at night, what phase is the moon in? it’s not that late  Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in? my sister’s room, attic, basement... Why can’t there be a 30, 40, 60, 70, 80, or 90 dollar bill? too hard to count  Have you ever bitten down on a fork and it felt really weird? omg, spoon as well, awful Is there a pencil sharpener within ten feet of you? hidden but I’m aware that’s there as I put it myself days ago Do you know a lot of people with the same name? (Like a lot of Johns) back in school

Do you think it rains too much where you live? that’d be an exaggeration Are you wearing shorts right now? r u kidding me? Do you like the name Skye? reminds me of my Choices gf 

Do you know anyone who travels all the time? it’s so popular nowadays, gross Do you think it’s selfish to travel all the time, when most people can’t? sorta but it’s not the only/main reason why I’m against  Can you see the moon from your bedroom window? nor currently but some nights

Are your ear lobes attached? no What’s the last animated movie you watched? Incredibles 2 (home, in 2020, not that I didn’t watch any animated movies for 2 years) Do you prefer your bed to be up high or low to the ground? I don’t care much? Do you know anyone who can’t swim? me  Do you bite your lips? yes

[bo0zey]

Pick your favorite questions from the list.

i will do them all for u 0.o

1. Name cianna [see-ah-nah]

2. Nationality mexican irish german romanian hungarian french

3. Age 20

4. Birthday december 17, 1999

5. Zodiac sign (or your primal zodiac sign) sun: sagittarius; ascendant: leo; moon: aries

6. Gender female

7. Sexuality uhhhhhhhhhhhh idk but i will willingly kiss either gender

8. Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself) /tagged/my-face or u could just google pictures of fat rats

9. What do you/did you study? I’m currently a sophomore nursing major!

10. What's your current job like?/What job would you like to have? I’m currently a microbiology TA and I love it :) My dream job would be something with animals, like a vet tech or veterinarian

11. Your birth order i’m the oldest!

12. How many siblings do you have? 2 younger brothers

13. Do you have good relations with your family? my mom was my best friend, my dad and i get along better now that i’m in college, my brothers and i get along pretty well & we’re staring to get closer now that they’re getting older n growing up n developing their own personalities lol

14. How many friends do you have? errrr idk this is a hard question. i have a lot of acquaintances but i’d say i have maybe like less than 10 real friends??

15. Your relationship status single :D

16. What do you look for in a SO? funny!!!!!!!!!must be humorous!!!!and sarcastic and a little weird w darker sense of humor so we can laugh n be dumb together!!!!!!! also i would like them to be kind to me and those around them bc mean ppl suck. also they have to like animals. also i would like them to be loyal and trustworthy and 110% in love w me. and for physical stuff idk kinda attractive but NOT CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE like i personally don't really like the typically ‘attractive’ person??? 

17. Do you have a crush? currently in love w the cute chinese boy who lives across from my dorm room even tho i have never even spoken to him n he is totally unaware of my existence!!!!!!!! hahah oops :D

18. When did you have your first kiss? i mean technically 3rd grade i think but that doesn't really count so like maybe 16????

19. Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands? i mean in the long term i would definitely like to have a serious relationship but at the moment i’m only into casual stuff bc my heart isn't ready to be broken again sknfkjdbnkjd

20. What are your deal breakers? errrr i’m not sure....cheating is a no no, ppl that are interested in fucking every single person they see is a turn off, DUMB PEOPLE like ppl you can't even have a proper conversation with bc they're so DUMB, and ppl who r mean/judgmental/arrogant

21. How was your day? ok! accidentally slept thru my math class but caught a glimpse of my crush across campus when he was abt to smoke a cig and i got chipotle n i online shopped a ton from shein

22. Favourite food & drink deep dish spinach pizza from giordano’s & orange vitamin water

23. What position do you sleep in? i fall asleep on my left side hugging a body pillow

24. What was your last dream about? ate a braid of hair and inside the braid was bacon

25. Your fears not going to make it thru nursing school, not being financially stable as an adult, not having a family of my own, probably more but those r currently top 3

26. Your dreams i don't have any idk....maybe having like a house of my own and having as many animals as i want?? and i would like a loving partner with a daughter of our own

27. Your goals survive nursing school and lose 40 pounds and don't die before my cat

28. Any pets? i have a dog named cherry Cola, a cat named Leto, and a betta fish named Perc

29. What are your hobbies? writing stories about people in love, listening to music

30. Any cool places in your area? in my college town??? NO it sucks. in my hometown??? Not really it’s a small lil village with only restaurants and parks. but at home i’m near downtown chicago so that’s cool i guess

31. What was your last awkward situation? the first thing that comes to mind is my FIRST and so far ONLY encounter with my crush. we live in the same dorm building and i was wearing my nursing scrubs and had no make up on and about to go upstairs to my dorm, and then i heard footsteps and i was like ‘hahaha what if its my crush’ AND THEN HE FUCKIGJNG appeared from down the hallway to go back to HIS DORM [which is RIGHT ACROSS FROM MINE] and i literally STARED at him, then threw open the door and RAN UP THE STAIRS LIKE I LITERALLY DIDNT EVEN HOLD THE DOOR OPEN FOR ME AND HE WAS LIKE SO CLOSE BEHIND ME I WAS JUST SO NERVOUS MY FLIGHT OR FIGHT RESPONSE TOOK OVER AND I FUCKING FLED I LITERALLY RAN AWAY FROM HIM I AHTE MYSELF SO MUCH IM SUCH AN IDIOT!!!!!!!!!

32. What is your last regret? errrrr idk i regret a lot of dumb things.......

33. Language/s you can speak English n a LITTLE bit of Spanish

34. Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.) i’m really into zodiac stuff and i have got to say they are pretty spot on in accuracy idk

35. Have any quirks? ummmm ofc!!i am the quirkiest person i know hajnjfxbkjx like if u asked my roommates/friends they’d probably be better at answering this than me bc i don't see anything abt me as quirky but they always tell me i am quirky and do weird things but idk man I'm just existing 

36. Your pet peeves err idk currently its ppl that constantly brag about dumb shit

37. Ideal vacation somewhere warm with me + the ocean + the loml + unlimited alcohol

38. Any scars? yeah :D both emotional AND physical!!!!

39. What does your last text message say? ‘ok thats a more than fair statement’

40. Last 5 things from your search history how many carbs should i eat, chipotle bowl calories, is the grim reaper the angel of death, ceftriaxone adverse effects, red man syndrome

41. What's your [device] background? lockscreen is a peach-theme background i made and home screen is my weight loss goals

42. What do you daydream about? the characters in my stories.................and being skinny 

43. Describe your dream home pretty brick house??? flowers outside??? 3 floors--main floor, basement and upstairs??? 3 bedrooms n 3 bathrooms maybe??? master bedroom has its own bathroom!!! and open concept main floor. big kitchen and very homey n warm all around. as for like an apartment i want something cozy and aesthetically pleasing and warm 

44. What's your religion/Your thought about religion i don't have a religion but if ppl do have a religion then thats not my business

45. Your personality type entj but only bc i got 3% extraverted; i am very closely related to intj tho n i think i fit that one better

46. The most dangerous thing you've done uhhhhhh probably operating a vehicle while high out of my mind. definitely the dumbest thing i ever did 0/10 would recommend anyone ever doing that

47. Are you happy with your current life? its ok but it could probably be better. i want to be done w college and skip to the part where i have a successful career and my own home and i can lay up w the loml every night

48. Some things you've tried in your life alcohol???weed??gummy edibles....

49. What does your wardrobe consist of? sweaters/sweatshirts/leggings

50. Favourite colour to wear? black, maroon, peach, purple, gray, idk

51. How would you describe your style? oh jeez idk i wear whatever i want so like e-girl when i really try and basic white girl when i don't care

52. Are you happy with your current looks? no i hate everything about myself lol

53. If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be? more freckles on my face....also be thinner n have longer hair

54. Any tattoos or piercings? my nose and septum are pierced!

55. Do you get complimented often? kinda by my friends but i always yell at them to stop so they don't compliment like as much bc they know i hate it but they still do it sometimes idk

56. Favourite aesthetic? i wanna be an e-girl yo!!!!!!!!! 

57. A popular trend that you dislike nobody has a crush on me and i hate it

58. Songs you're currently obsessed with? pied piper by BTS

59. Song you normally wouldn't admit you like. anything by BTS lol i used to like be embarrassed for how much i like k pop but now i don't really care lol #stanBTS2020

60. Favourite genre? rap/r n b/alternative

61. Favourite artist/band/genre? i listen to every genre except country sooooooo yeah i really like billie eilish, BTS, the weeknd, juicewrld, lil nas x, trippie red, post malone,

62. Hated popular songs/artists? i don't rlly like selena gomez or justin bieber or taylor swift

63. Put your music on shuffle and list first 5 only - RY X i.f.l.y. - Bazzi novacane - frank ocean jungle - drake bang! - trippie redd

64. Can you sing or play any instruments? no and no

65. Do you like karaoke? no but i like to sing along to songs when I'm alone

66. Own any albums? haha noooo i got apple music son

67. Do you listen to radio? What stations? errr RARELY i used to listen to r n b stations tho

68. Favourite movie/series? idk donnie darko?? i also just finished tharntype n that was really good. also i liked tokyo ghoul. AND GIVEN IS REALLY GOOD

69. Favourite genre of movies/books/etc i like horror/scary/paranormal/funny movies and i like love stories in books

70. Your fictional crush/es danny phantom, ken kaneki

71. Which fictional character is you? uhhhh idk...

72. Are you a shipper? List your otps, if so frerard, ryden, taekook, mewgulf

73. Favourite greek god? idk they all kinda suck but maybe hades

74. A legend from where you live that you like i don't really know any:(

75. Do you like art? What's your favourite work or artist? i like to look at art! i think van gogh is cool

76. Can you share your other social media? ig: ciannnna venmo: ciannnna

77. Favourite youtubers? i don't really watch youtubers but maybe shane dawson and emma chamberlain

78. Favourite platform? twitter

79. How much time do you spend on the internet? too much time

80. What video games have you played? Which one's your favourite? i once played GTA5 that was fun!

81. Your favourite books (manga also counts) idk i don't really read anymore:/ i was into the hunger games and the twilight series when i was young. now i kinda read online manga and i really liked BJ Alex and killing stalking. and like for online books the unholyverse series, a splitting of the mind, the anatomy of a fall

82. Do you play board/card games? no but i like to play checkers and uno and cards against humanity

83. Have you ever been to a night marathon in cinema? nopee

84. Favourite holiday halloween is cool also christmas is alright bc gifts

85. Are you into dramas? i’ve been getting into thai boys love dramas lol sue me

86. Would you use death note, if you had one? um YES.

87. What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to? everyone needs to be a little kinder and have a crush on me

88. Could you survive a zombie apocalypse? absolutely not I'm not physically fit and don't have useful skills

89. If you had to be turned into a paranormal being, what would it be? vampire duh [or maybe ghost]

90. What would you want to happen to you after your death? i want to see my mom

91. If you had to change your name, what would be your pick? idk something cool ... i love the name Daisy

92. Who would you switch your life with for a week? idk probably kylie jenner

93. Pick an emoji to be your tattoo idk the alien? 94. Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true -im very productive with my time management skills -my favorite color is purple -i don't get nervous when I'm alone in public

95. Cold or hot? cold

96. Be a hero or be a villain? anti-hero

97. Sing everything you want to say or rhyme? sing if i’m good at it but if I'm not good then rhyme

98. Shapeshifting or controlling time? shapeshifting

99. Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death?immortal

100. ..... or .....? ......?

[nastybuckybarnes]

Bodyguard  -  Two

Pairing: Bodyguard!Bucky X Politician!Reader

Summary: As a young and controversial politician, you face some opposition. After a death threat is made and your security is at risk, you agree to get a bodyguard. You don’t expect him to be the most irritating and attractive man on the planet. With a history so deep and twisted you never thought you’d figure it out, a terrible corporation is determined to take you out of the political picture; using any means necessary. The only question is, how far is James willing to go to ensure your safety?

Warnings: Angst, Violence, threats, injuries, kidnapping, drugging, political talk (not a lot), terrorism (Wait for the plot twist tho guys), Smut, Fluff, PTSD, (More to Come)

Word Count: 1.5K

A/n: And part two!! Slow for now, but wait ‘till the next chapter. oh looooords

BASED OFF OF THE NETFLIX ORIGINAL: BODYGUARD TAGLIST IS OPEN MASTERLIST Part one

~*~

"Three attacks in nine months. How does that make you feel, Madame Secretary?” You think about the interviewer's question for a moment before answering.

“It saddens me that so many innocent lives have been lost. But it also makes me curious about the reason behind the attacks. Why attack the train station and the bus stop and the coffee shop? What’s the connection? What is the point? These attacks are targeting innocents, why? What lesson is being taught here?” He nods and glances at the screen over your shoulder.

“What do you plan to do about them? Many have said that these are attacks from foreign countries in the Middle East. Should we reintroduce a ban on Middle Eastern people?” You scoff out loud, shaking your head at how stupid he sounds.

“What would that solve? There are speculations built on fear, that the terrorists were not white. However, there is absolutely no proof that the terrorists weren’t Americans. I will not advise a ban on an entire group of people, based on incidents of the past. If we count up all the casualties from terrorist attacks by white Americans, we’re looking at thousands of deaths and hundreds of thousands of injuries. I refuse to allow the fear of a few sways the opinions of many. To make myself explicitly clear, there is no proof of any race being responsible for the terrorist attacks. There is also no ban on any race thus far. We are not banning anyone from our country, so long as our laws are being followed and our rights are being adhered to.”

The interview ends shortly after that and you couldn’t be happier.

“Thank you again for coming in, Madame Secretary.” As the reporter goes to shake your hand, a man bumps into him, causing him to bump into you and spill your coffee all over your blouse.

You gasp, the hot drink burning your skin, and jump away from the man.

“Shit! Jesus Fucking Christ!” You glance at your ruined blouse and pinche the bridge of your nose.

“I’m meeting with a representative of the President in half an hour!” You try to calm down and think of how to fix your shirt.

“Where’s Wanda! Have her bring me a fresh blouse!” You order, glaring at the man behind the interviewer.

“There’s no time,” Sergeant Barnes says from behind you, tugging his tie off and slipping out of his suit jacket. You watch as he sheds his white shirt, eyes fluttering to his left arm.

It’s made completely out of metal.

“My shirt has been altered to fit over my vest. The chest to waist ratio should be compatible.” His eyes flicker over your torso for a moment before returning to your face. “Shirt is fresh this morning, Ma’am.” You offer him a smile and take the warm white shirt from his hand. He pulls his suit jacket back on and buttons it up to cover his white kevlar vest.

“Here, I’ll show you to the restroom.” You follow the interviewer, Sergeant Barnes a step behind you.

The shirt is warm and incredibly comfortable when you put it on. You tuck it into your pants and situate your Jacket to make it look more like a woman’s shirt, then leave the bathroom.

“Can’t even tell,” Barnes says, nodding to your new outfit. You smile a thank you then follow him out of the building and into the car that’s waiting for the two of you.

~

“Madame Secretary,” The PR says, shaking your hand firmly. “Mister Sitwell. Always a pleasure.” He nods and sits down with you, eyeing your bodyguard wearily for a moment.

“It’s a shame President Pierce couldn’t join us,” you say, trying to ease the tension.

“Yes. It is. However, he trusts that we’ll be brief but thorough.” You nod and start talking about what to do.

“The current terrorist threat level in America is at High. We want to get back down to Elevated at the least. I recommend being more thorough at all Airport security checkpoints and all borders. I also think it would be good to have more security throughout the country in general. At bus stations and train stations. Places with high civilian counts. I have a meeting with the Prime minister of Canada and I also will be speaking to the Home Secretary of the UK. After these meetings, I’ll have more information on what our next course of action should be.”

Sitwell nods and glances at his watch. “Keep myself and the President notified on any changes we must take. The safety of American citizens is our number one priority.”

The rest of the meeting goes by in a blur of conversations that you’ve grown tired of.

When the meeting’s finally over, you relax, eyes falling closed as the car drives smoothly towards your house.

~

You’re just stepping out of the shower when an odd feeling washes over you.

“Sergeant Barnes?” You call softly, turning off the lights in the bathroom and walking slowly to the window.

“Ma’am?” He knocks on the door then slowly opens it. His eyes find your towel-clad form but quickly move away when he sees the way you’re looking at the Window.

He presses on his earpiece and glances at you.

“Control, 10-12, stand by. Assistance may be needed at the southeast second-floor window.” He moves along the wall to the window and slowly glances out the blinds.

“Copy that, Barnes. Were on our way. ETA two minutes.”

“Control, 10-61. Man, late thirties in the tree 1-0 feet away from the window. Large camera in hand.”

Your heart beats faster as you realize they might catch the man who's been giving you so much trouble.

“Copy, I’ve got eyes on him. We’re closing in. Find a secure location inside the house for her for the time being.” Sergeant Barnes takes you by the arm and gingerly pulls you out of the bathroom.

“Get dressed quickly.” He turns his back to you and you stare at it for a minute. After deciding he won't turn around, you grab a pair of pyjamas and change quickly.

“Alright. We’ve got a 952 (suspicious vehicle) driving down her street. Licence plate Hotel-2-Delta-6-Romeo-4.” He mouths the words to himself a few times, trying to memorize them and their configuration.

“Barnes?” You ask softly, voice wavering slightly.

“Come with me.” You follow him to the guest bedroom, almost stumbling in the dark. When you finally reach the room, he sits you down on the bed, one gloved hand resting on his gun.

You bring your knees up to your chest and take deep breaths, calming yourself down as your bodyguard listens to whatever’s going on in his ear.

“He’s running! 10-80 (chase in progress). I need- oh shit!” Sam’s voice gets cut off by the sound of gunfire.

You squeak on the bed at the loud noise, pressing your forehead to your knees.

“Control, what the Hell’s happening out there?” He looks over at you then glances out the window, trying to see something. Anything.

“10-32 (man with gun), keep her inside. Suspect has a gun and has opened fire. Move to the basement, Barnes.”

He takes you by the hand and pulls you out of the room and down the stairs, catching you when you miss a step and almost eat shit.

“To the basement,” he whispers, eyes darting around the house. You hurry down another flight of stairs and watch as he scans the area before deeming it safe.

You sit down on the ground and lean your head against the wall, overwhelmed by everything that’s going on.

“Hey, you’re gonna be okay.” You nod with his words, knowing you won’t be hurt. This is all mostly a huge inconvenience anyway.

“Control, Suspect is -oof! Contained. We have him.” He exhales deeply and smiles to himself.

“They’ve got him, Ma’am. You’re safe.”

~

A gunshot.

Tires squealing against concrete.

Blood splattered everywhere.

A car flipping and rolling rolling rolling.

A dead man in the front seat.

A child, terrified in the back.

Screams erupt, more shots are fired.

He’s dead already.

There’s blood all over the child’s face. In her hair.

She’s crying. Screaming and terrified.

~

You wake up with a startled gasp, eyes darting around your room. A few moments pass before you remember that you’re safe.

As the anniversary of his death approaches, the nightmares are growing increasingly realistic and frequent.

You sigh heavily and climb out of bed, navigating your way through the dark house and putting the kettle on.

You put your face in your hands as a tear slides down your cheek, trying to stay silent and not wake up your bodyguard.

“What are you doing up, ma’am?” You gasp at his voice and spin around, clutching your shirt and panting. “I-I...” you trail off and look away from his intense gaze.

“You’re safe here. I promise you that.” You shake your head. “It’s not that. I... ugh.” You find yourself embarrassed to admit this. “I sometimes have nightmares. Nothing major. I make myself tea and do some work or something.”

He watches you for a few moments before speaking. “I... understand the feeling.” You look back up at him, shock clear as day on your face.

“I was stationed overseas during my time with the military,” is the only explanation he gives.

You nod and look back at the kettle.

“Would-would you like some tea?” The world freezes as soon as the words roll off your tongue.

The clock ticks once, twice, three times before- “I’d love some. Thank you, ma’am.”

~*~

TAGS:

PERMANENT TAGS: @smolbeanbucky @wildefire @inumorph @impalatobakerstreet @nanna022 @mummy-woves-you @m-a-t-91 @wtfholland @bookgirlunicorn @beautifulwisdom2001 @deep-sea-glitter @mrhiddles-81 @iamwarrenspeace @bitchacho25 @escapetheshackles @i-know-i-can @buckyssoul @avnngrs @swoonhui @destiel-artemis @frozenhuntress67 @unlikelygalaxygiver @agentlokidottir @viarogers

MARVEL: @fallenangelfangirl @look-to-the-stars-and-wish @maladaptive-ninja-returns @cliffordasparagus @april-14-blog @potteritis @momc95 @shakzer00 @inkedaztec @cal-ifornication @heartislubbingdubbing @my-suga-kookies

BUCKY: @chuuulip @nerd-without-a-cause @natashasnight @dragonrosegardens @saharzek @fandom-princess-forevermore

BODYGUARD: @the-surviving-revolutionist @spnsquirrel @alohafromhell1 @loki-ang-batang-heneral @emilysallysmith @farfromjustordinary @rebbie444 @mylife-love-and-other-things @lumar014​ @goldtsunami @casuallydarktiger @iammomohearmerawr @tayahs-blog

#bucky #bodyguard bucky x politician reader #bodyguard bucky #bodyguard!bucky x reader #bodyguard!bucky x Politician!reader #bodyguard au #bucky x reader #bucky x you

[kanasmusings]

[Translation] QUELL “Matchless People” Track 5

Track 5~ It’s the last track for the actual CD but there’s still the mini drama that comes with it ^^ I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I did because the angst and resolution was all just great! 

Thank you again to Deea for the files~! Please don’t ask her for them as per her request and please don’t ask if I’ll be sharing mine as well, thank you ^^

※ Please don’t re-post these translations without permission. Instead of reposting, please just like/reblog instead ^^

Under the cut, enjoy~!

Track 05: [君の隣に立つために] “So that I can be able to stand next to you.”

[0:00]

  (Issei walking around)

ISSEI: (yawns) Hm? There’s no one here…

ISSEI: Are they all out somewhere? Hm?

ISSEI: This is breakfast. Oh.

(Issei picks up a note)

ISSEI: “We went out for a bit but we’ll be back by lunch.” From Eichi…

ISSEI: Ah, he’s really considerate.

ISSEI: I have to eat properly before Eichi comes home.

(Issei opens a pot’s lid)

ISSEI: I knew it. There was some miso soup.

ISSEI: Let’s warm it up.

(Issei close the lid and starts pressing buttons)

ISSEI: And then… I have to prepare some rice and make side dishes at the stove... Ah, I have to make some now.

(Issei turns the faucet on)

ISSEI: I wonder what Ichiru’s doing now…

ISSEI: It looks like he wasn’t in his room. It’s his day off today so maybe… he went out somewhere?

(Issei turns the faucet off)

ISSEI: Wait… It’s been a while since Ichiru and I weren’t together…

ISSEI: Until recently, I felt uneasy whenever we weren’t together but… I wonder why?

ISSEI: I feel like I’m not that worried at all.

(Ichiru comes running in)

ICHIRU: Ah…!

ISSEI: Ichiru?!

ICHIRU: Issei… You were awake?

ISSEI: Yep, good morning. You were out? Were you with Eichi by any chance?

ICHIRU: Yeah, well, for a bit.

ISSEI: I see. I just woke up.

ISSEI: Did you eat lunch, Ichiru?

ICHIRU: Not yet.

ISSEI: Want something to eat? I’m about to eat breakfast so want me to make something while I’m at it?

ISSEI: Is there something left in the fridge?

(Issei opens the refrigerator)

ISSEI: Um… Eggs and tomatoes and…

ICHIRU: Issei, um…!

ISSEI: Hm?

ICHIRU: Um… I’m sorry about… yesterday.

ICHIRU: I’m really… sorry.

ISSEI: (closes the fridge before turning to Ichiru) You didn’t say anything wrong, Ichiru.

ISSEI: I should be the one saying sorry.

ICHIRU: No…! You didn’t say anything wrong either.

ISSEI: That’s not true. I didn’t follow my own advice. I only thought it was natural that you’d scold me.

ISSEI: I’ve already reflected on it. I’m sorry, too.

ICHIRU: But, I… Shouted at you in public.

ISSEI: Ichiru, I have a favour.

ICHIRU: What?

ISSEI: I want to go eat. Can we talk about it while eating?

ICHIRU: Y-Yeah, of course. I don’t mind at all.

ISSEI: (smiles) Thank you. Ah, I forgot about the miso soup!

ICHIRU: Miso soup? W-woah…! (Ichiru rushes to turn the pot off)

ICHIRU: That was close… It almost overflowed.

ISSEI: Ah… I forgot I switched it on…

ICHIRU: I’ll do it. I just have to eat it up, right?

ISSEI: Yeah… But—

ICHIRU: Just let me. I’ll do it.

ISSEI: Got it. Then, I’ll go get the table ready.

  ICHIRU: Geez… I’m sure that he’s still half-asleep or something.

ICHIRU: Um… heat the miso soup and then er…

[04:00]

  ICHIRU: It’s done.

ISSEI: Thank you.

(Ichiru sets the table and Issei takes a picture suddenly)

ISSEI: I got a nice picture~ Thank you for the food.

(Issei starts eating)

ICHIRU: I made that eggplant miso soup… Though, I made it with the broth that Eichi made yesterday.

ISSEI: It’s delicious.

ICHIRU: Right?! It got a bit over boiled so I was worried the taste might change.

ISSEI: It’s okay.

ICHIRU: You were that hungry, huh?

ISSEI: It’s like Ichiru said.

ICHIRU: Huh? Did I say anything?

ISSEI: I didn’t get to eat much yesterday. I think it was because I was too tired from not being able to sleep.

ICHIRU: Oh, that? You’re only realizing that now?

ISSEI: Yeah.

ISSEI: I thought I’d be fine if I didn’t sleep for just one day.

ICHIRU: Geez… You’re too thick-headed, Issei.

ISSEI: I guess I am.

ISSEI: From now on I’ll eat properly. And I’ll sleep when I’m sleepy. I’ll discuss with everyone if I can’t fall asleep.

ISSEI: I’ll stop judging easily whether something is a big deal or not.

ICHIRU: Yeah. I’ll be happy if you do that, too.

ISSEI: That’s why, if there’s something that bugs you again, I want you to tell me properly.

ISSEI: I want to fix my bad points, too.

ISSEI: Oh, and, I’m sorry for being too nagging. I trust you properly and--

ICHIRU: Ahh…!! Wait a sec, stop!

ISSEI: Ichiru?

ICHIRU: If you go and apologize that much, it’d be hard for me to apologize, y’know?

ISSEI: Hm? You already did, didn’t you?

ICHIRU: I only got to say ‘sorry’, didn’t I?! I haven’t said anything else yet.

ISSEI: That’s more than enough.

ISSEI: Plus, now that I think about it, the things I kept warning you about were just me being overprotective. You don’t have to mind them.

ICHIRU: Of course I would! Ah, but… I don’t mind being told to be careful and it makes me happy but… that’s not it!

ICHIRU: I want to be able to do something even without being told.

ICHIRU: Like you and Shu.

ISSEI: Ichiru doesn’t have to be like me or Shu. You’re fine as you are.

ICHIRU: But…!

ISSEI: Then, what would you do if I said that I want to be like you or Eichi?

ICHIRU: Huh? You don’t have to, you know? Ah…

ISSEI: See what I mean?

ICHIRU: That’s true but…

ICHIRU: (groans)

ISSEI: What’s wrong?

ICHIRU: I just can’t win against you…

ISSEI: Do you want to?

ICHIRU: No… It’s not like I want to, it’s… I just don’t want to be left behind…

ICHIRU: I want to stand beside you or something…

ISSEI: (chuckles) Oh, so felt that way, too?

ICHIRU: Eh…?

ISSEI: I do, too. I feel the same.

ICHIRU: Eh…? What?!

ISSEI: I want to be prouder and confidently say that we’re twins someday!

ISSEI: I’ve always thought so. Maybe we really are similar somehow.

ICHIRU: Because we’re twins…?

ISSEI: No, because we want to always do our best together.

ICHIRU: I see… That’s right!

ISSEI: Yeah, I’m sure it is.

ICHIRU: Ah, wait a sec.

ISSEI: Hm? What’s wrong?

(Ichiru leaves to grab something)

[08:05]

  ICHIRU: Here. I bought it for you.

ISSEI: Can I open it?

ICHIRU: Yeah.

(Issei opens the present)

ISSEI: Ah, it’s the fashionable glasses we saw yesterday!

ICHIRU: I had Eichi take me there and we kinda discussed what would be good…

ICHIRU: But I knew that these were the best style!

ICHIRU: It matches with mine.

ISSEI: Did you go and buy these this morning?

ICHIRU: Yeah. I kinda planned to be home before you woke up.

ICHIRU: I was gonna hand these to you and then we’d make up.

ISSEI: Even though I wasn’t mad?

ICHIRU: I wanted to apologize.

ICHIRU: I didn’t want to just “sort of” make up.

ICHIRU: Plus… I didn’t want yesterday to remain a bitter memory…

ICHIRU: That’s why I had Eichi come with me shopping but only I came back earlier.

ICHIRU: I wanted to talk with you properly.

ISSEI: So that’s why… (smiles)

ISSEI: Thank you! I’ll have to thank Eichi later, too.

ICHIRU: Did you say anything to Shu this morning, Issei…?

ISSEI: To Shu? I haven’t met him today though…

ICHIRU: Ah… You’re the type who doesn’t remember sleep-talking…

ISSEI: Should we go out somewhere after we eat? Just the two of us while wearing these (the sunglasses)?

ICHIRU: As a disguise?

ISSEI: Yeah! And a hat, too~!

ICHIRU: Let’s go! Yeah, let’s do it.

ICHIRU: Oh yeah! Wanna go take a look at the boxed lunches from yesterday?

ISSEI: That’s a great idea. Let’s buy four then~

ISSEI: Oh, I wanna see the pet stores, too.

ICHIRU: Since it’s our day-off, too!

ISSEI: Let’s enjoy ourselves today~

[10:00]

  SHU: Shiki!

SHIKI: Sorry for making you wait.

SHU: No, I just arrived myself.

SHIKI: This is unusual. I thought that since it’s you, you’d be sitting at a private booth.

SHU: Don’t you like it?

SHIKI: Nah, I’m the type who enjoys myself in any kind of situation.

SHIKI: You’re the one who doesn’t like crowds, aren’t you?

SHU: Have I ever mentioned that?

SHIKI: I can tell that much just by looking.

  SHIKI/SHU: Cheers.

SHIKI: This is delicious.

SHIKI: You’re drinking tea? You really not up to trying at least one glass?

SHU: Unfortunately, no.

SHU: I’d end up causing trouble for everyone around me if I started feeling bad.

SHU: It’s just my constitution so I can’t do anything about it.

SHIKI: I imagined that you couldn’t handle alcohol but I didn’t think you’d be this much of a non-drinker.

SHIKI: Well, I guess that’s so like you. So? What did you want to talk about?

SHU: It’s um…

SHIKI: Oh? It’s rare for you to be tongue-tied. Even though you hounded on me when I left our former unit.

SHU: That’s…

SHIKI: You were the only one who directly told me not to quit. Multiple times, too.

SHIKI: The others didn’t really mind or care or they thought that it’d be wasted effort, or just laugh and say “that’s so like you.”

SHIKI: Each of them either understood me or didn’t.

SHU: I didn’t want to give up even if it seemed impossible.

SHIKI: I see.

SHU: I didn’t want you to get too far ahead. Even now, I still want to catch up with you, with SolidS.

SHU: I didn’t want to be protected, taught, and then catch up a long while after.

SHU: I wanted to stand at the same place as you.

SHIKI: (smiles) I thought so.

SHU: (smiles) I told you all I felt and that’s the extent of your reaction?

SHIKI: I told you a while ago, remember? I can tell that much just by looking at you.

SHU: Am I really that easy to read?

SHIKI: Lately, you’ve become easier to read. Though you did manage to put on a passable poker face during the general meeting.

SHIKI: Though, your true feelings showed afterwards.

SHU: If only that would count as a good poker face.

SHU: I think I keep losing face when it comes to you. It really is a bit frustrating that you can always notice it.

SHIKI: I get nervous if I don’t notice it. I mean that in a good way, of course.

SHIKI: As an artist, there’s really no one who’s in full control of their emotions.

SHU: Shiki…

SHIKI: Also, I don’t particularly dislike tenacious people, you know?

SHIKI: As proof, I’m constantly surrounded by those kinds of people.

SHIKI: You can compete with me anytime you want, you know? I’ll take you on as long as it’s not a drinking competition.

SHU: (smiles) Got it. I’ll cling on to that while relying on you at the same time.

SHU: Anyway, without further ado.

SHIKI: Hm? This is?

SHU: The talks about the promotion. I gave it some more thought.

SHU: Would you take a look at them?

SHIKI: You… It would’ve been better to discuss this in a private booth, you know?

SHU: If we talk quietly, it would be no different from our usual meetings in a meeting room.

SHU: I wanted to be more frank about it.

SHU: It’s a material that I planned to bring so I prepared for this beforehand.

SHU: If someone caught a glimpse of it, the words inside are only things we can understand.

SHU: Also, since I don’t drink, there’s zero chance that I’ll lose the files from being drunk.

SHIKI: Wait, I can’t let that last line slide.

SHIKI: I haven’t lost anything even when I was drunk, you know?

SHU: I heard a rumor that someone’s a bit difficult when he’s tired though~

SHIKI: Ah… The rumor’s origins are so easy to tell that it makes my head spin.

SHIKI: Damn it… Don’t treat me like a forgetful old man just because I hit 30.

SHU: You’ll listen to me, won’t you?

(Shiki takes a sip of his drink before replying)

SHIKI: Yeah, of course.

  ==END==

※ Please don’t re-post the English translations without permission.

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#quell #quell translations #my translations #tsukipro #drama cd #i'd like to say it's the final one but there's still the mini drama cd XD