#i really do need to go empty the dishwasher now lol
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The Sublet - Roommate!AU
Warnings: She/her pronouns, slow burn, angst. Tags will be added as the fic goes along. Talks of domestic violence, talks of trauma, talks of toxic relationships and infidelity, survivors guilt, victims guilt, manipulation, family issues, smut, creampie, fluff (lol).
Pairings: Modern!Aemond x Reader
Summary: Living with Helaena Targaryen was one of the best decisions you had ever made. Meeting at university, the two of you became thick as thieves and quickly best friends, moving into a flat together. But what will happen when Helaena has to leave, and her quiet, brooding, brother moves in?
Notes: Sorry for the delay on this chapter, I've had some intense writers block and didn't quite know how to finish this chapter haha, so hopefully I did it some justice finally. Enjoy <3
Chapter 9: Eye of the storm
You didn’t know what to expect after your argument turned ‘talk’, if you could call it that, with Aemond the night before. Nor did you know how to react when you woke that morning and saw, much to your dismay, that the kitchen was empty.
There was no steaming tea waiting for you like there had been usually, nor was there the presence of your brooding roommate. It didn’t help that when you ventured to the kitchen expecting to see your mug and your tea perfectly made for you, that it was not there, and your heart felt a twinge of pain.
You had to reason with yourself that he needed space. Time. And that perhaps he had taken you up on your encouragement to think about his actions before he went to sleep. And if you were really lucky, which you hoped you were with some bitter spite, he may have even stayed awake all evening, staring up at the ceiling the entire night and was now having to catch up on the sleep he hadn’t got.
But that wasn’t the case.
Because Aemond’s door was wide open, and when you opened the dishwasher to check, there you saw a singular mug inside, the tiniest of coffee drips sliding out of the mug and over the rack.
Aemond was awake.
Aemond wasn’t home.
And Aemond had made himself coffee, and not you.
But you questioned yourself if you would have made tea for someone after an argument. Then you remembered, that yes, you had. And yes, you would again.
But Aemond wasn't you.
Had you pushed him too far?
Was bringing up his childhood something you shouldn’t have done?
These thoughts tumbled through your mind as you made your tea and readied yourself for the work day.
The morning went by slowly. When you were ready, you left for work and spent the entire day biting at your lips and fingernails in anxiety at the thought of when you would come home to the nightmare that you had a hand in creating.
Thankfully for you, Larys was off sick, or off site, or whatever Jasper had told you; you had barely been listening. Barely even been present as you skimmed through your emails and went through the motions of your tasks mindlessly, mind on one thing and one thing only.
Him.
When you got home the apartment was empty which you had expected. It didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt though.
Perhaps he went to go stay with one of his friends?
Or maybe he was out on one of his many jogs? Or doing whatever else he did during the day that you were not privy to.
So you settled for your made up alibis, and slid into the kitchen, playing some soft music, though just soft enough in the hopes of being able to hear him come home, and began to cook your dinner.
But by the time you had cooked, and eaten, and bathed, and crawled into bed, it was nearing midnight and still Aemond had not come home.
You laid in your bed, and stared up at the roof for what felt like forever, looking at the ceiling medallion, trying to ease your mind and not have thoughts of the illusive man that was Aemond running amuck in your mind. But no matter what you did, no matter how many videos you watched on your phone, or memes you cracked a smile at, you still could not find rest.
Sighing loudly, you checked the time.
3am.
Fuck.
Thinking that a cup of tea might help you to settle, you threw back your sheets and climbed out of bed, leaving your phone on charge as you moved blindly through your room in the dark, and out to the kitchen.
The lights were off in the apartment, and only the softest of orange glows from an outdoor street lamp came through the bathroom window. The rest of the apartment was bathed in black, barest hints of moonlight streaming in through the kitchen.
Silver hair caught the light of the moon and thus your attention, and you watched as a small red ember grew in size with the inhale of Aemond’s cigarette.
Aemond, it seemed, could not find sleep either.
He stood in the kitchen, just as sleepless as you, black shirt thrown over grey sweats as he leant against the kitchen windowsill, blowing smoke outside with each drag.
His silver tresses of hair glimmered, reflecting the light, as though each strand had been made of moonlight itself.
You watched as his lips pursed to take another drag, tilting his head towards you as and indication that he had noticed your presence. But it wasn't for you. He did not greet you, nor did he turn his head to face you, staying still as he was, looking out into the night.
With soft steps, you made your way over, flicking on the kettle to boil some water, quietly pulling down a mug, then thinking about it for a moment, and reaching for a second, grabbing some chamomile tea bags for the both of you putting them in the cups.
The sound of the kettle was loud in your ears as you waited for it to boil, shifting on your feet awkwardly as you watched Aemond finish his cigarette, twisting the end on the outside of the brickwork, leaving the butt on the sill.
You watched in the corner of your eye, as he rolled another with deft fingers and a precision that you admired secretly.
When the kettle had boiled, you poured the water over the tea bags, picking one up, to hand to him. You averted your eyes, looking down to where his long fingers held the cigarette in his pointer and middle, wordlessly handing him the mug.
It hovered between you for a moment, arm outstretched as Aemond looked at it. Time moved slowly as he did not reach for the tea, and for a moment, your heart sank, disappointment settling in your gut as the weight of the mug became heavier and heavier.
As you were about to pull it back admitting defeat, Aemond reached a slender hand, grasping the boiling hot mug from its sides, which would have no doubt burnt at his palm hotly. He didn’t thank you or nod his head in appreciation, not that you were looking to see, but instead, he placed the mug on the sill, picking up the lighter with the other hand as he moved to light the cigarette between his lips.
You grabbed your mug and leant against the kitchen bench on the opposite side of the window with him, looking out into the darkness, barely registering the buildings more than 10 metres away.
Anything to not look at him.
To not ruin the perfectly calm moment that the two of you had reached in that moment.
Finally in the eye of the storm.
You brought your mug up to your lips, blowing the steam from the top, the smell of chamomile wafting around you. You sipped at the brew, feeling the heat travel down your throat and settle into your stomach warmly.
You refused to speak first.
Or to say anything at all really.
Not wanting to push him again, to ruin the calm that settled between you, to then end up with the both of you, red faced and shaking with anger. You didn’t trust yourself to not explode, nor did you trust his ability to speak to you in a way that wasn’t patronising.
If Aemond wanted to speak, he would speak, and if not, you were content to sit in this silence to at least show that you could listen, would listen, if he so dared to open his mouth.
To show that you were willing to be around him despite his shitty behaviour.
Smoke billowed from his lips, and the cigarette that was held delicately, yet almost even carelessly between two fingers, was shifted out towards you. You looked down at it, for one beat, then two, before placing your mug of tea down to grasp the cigarette from him.
Warmth spread through your arm as your fingertips brushed over his, butterflies erupting in your chest, but you shoved that feeling down quickly, bringing the cigarette up to your lips to inhale. You took a drag, feeling the smoke sink into your lungs before you blew it out quietly, feeling the rush of it go to your head.
“I thought about what you said.” Aemond finally breathed into the night, voice quiet and shy.
Your eyes lifted to look at him. His gaze was still outside as he leant forward on the window, hands clasped together, elbows on the edge of the wood. He fiddled with the signet ring on his pinky, turning it side to side.
Bringing the cigarette up to your lips again you took another drag, letting Aemond have the space to talk, and also using the smoke as a means to force yourself to stay quiet so that he could say what he needed to say, and then you would go to bed.
Yes, that’s what you would do. Hear him out, most likely another shithouse apology, and then go to bed angry but vindicated.
Wordlessly you held out his smoke, watching as he kept his eye lowered as he took it from your hands, mug of tea in the other, palm wrapped around the porcelain which you questioned if he enjoyed the sting, or the grounding of the pain.
Maybe he was punishing himself.
Aemond brought the cigarette to his lips, inhaled deeply and then exhaled a breath as he spoke, “And you were right.” Smoke curled under his nose as he inhaled it back inside, “But you were also wrong too.”
You let your eyes roam his side profile, his nose long and sharp, lips pursed as he sucked at his gums, tongue rolling over the front of his teeth, thinking of the words to say next, perhaps thinking of how to apologise to you properly this time.
“I am sorry. For what I said to you.” He apologised, true repentance on his tongue, “It wasn’t right, and you didn’t deserve that. I know you’re just trying to be a good friend to Helaena by doing me a favour, and I know that you’re trying to be a friend to me.” Aemond inhaled slowly, bringing up the cigarette to take another drag, “But like I tried to say, these things don’t come easy to me.”
Despite his apology, there was still his lingering attitude in the way he spoke, the words he had chosen. The way he conducted himself, as though he was angry that he had been called out, or that he had to be a better person to you.
You chewed at your cheek, not wanting to respond just yet, holding out your fingers towards him as he handed you the cigarette.
Another brush of hands.
You held the filter in your fingers, turning the cigarette softly as silence fell over the two of you.
Aemond brushed an uneasy hand through the front of his hair, large hand sliding down his neck as you watched his eyelashes flutter, up, down, but never once looking at you.
As though he couldn’t bare to face you.
He inhaled sharply, bare foot tapping on the tiled floor in irritation, “I know you think you know what happened between me and Alys, but Helaena doesn’t even know the whole of it. I-“ Aemond paused, swallowing thickly, “It’s not been easy these past few months without her, not that it was ever easy.” He sadly scoffed, adjusted his weight on his legs, “But she’s been trying to get back with me, texting, calling, and I don’t- I don’t know… I think it’s finally caught up to me what happened.”
You handed the smoke back, sipping your chamomile tea, enjoying the burn that it gave you, and also the way that it calmed your nerves, giving you something to focus on rather than the way that Aemond seemed to begin to curl in on himself, taking every fibre of your being to not reach out and comfort him.
He chanced a glance at you, and stooped over the window, bent from the hips, his eye line was below yours, and so he had to look up at you through his lashes, wetting his lips with the tip of his tongue, steeling himself for what he was about to say.
Aemond brought the smoke to his lips, holding it there for a moment, before he began to speak, fingertips resting over his mouth as he spoke, “It wasn’t always bad, but she was much older,” He shifted again uncomfortably and you mirrored his action, “And I was too young and naive to see the truth of it.”
You hadn’t expected this.
Hadn’t expected Aemond to open up to you about Alys, something that had been clearly affecting him as of late.
Aemond sighed in a breath and you watched as he began to turn his signet ring with his thumb again, eye watching to motion carefully, methodically twisting it in sets of three.
Twist, twist, twist. Pause.
Twist, twist, twist. Pause.
“She was one of my tutors at KLU,” Aemond explained, and you felt your stomach drop, "It wasn’t- it started innocently enough. Lessons here and there, but then she- Well I… It felt good to be wanted. Felt good to have something that no-one could take from me. Not Viserys, not my brother, not- But then someone found out, and Alys said that we needed to leave KLU so that we could be together.”
Your lips parted in shock, watching as Aemond shook his head, taking a frustrated drag of the cigarette, ash falling from the end onto the sill which he swiped away with a finger agitatedly, “So I stopped my degree, left KLU, and went to Harrenhal with her. At first it was easy, perfect. I was so in love with her, but then she kept pushing the idea of having kids, of getting married.”
Married.
Kids.
“At first I was excited,” His eye flicked onto you, a sad smile pulling downwards on his lips, “Who doesn’t want to hear from the love of their life that they want to settle down? But then she kept asking about Viserys, and the law firm, and inheritance.” He spat, “And I knew, I knew that she was using me… But I couldn’t leave. I couldn’t. I loved her.”
A twinge of empathy rolled through you.
How could you have been so blind to this?
“So I stayed, and it just got worse.”
You opened your mouth to speak, to say that you were sorry, to comfort him, but Aemond shook his head at you, watching as the words stuck in the back of your throat, “She started seeing other people,” Your mouth went dry, your own understanding of how he must of felt settling in your chest painfully, “And at first she kept it a secret, but then she did it more openly.”
You had the sudden desire to wring his ex’s neck.
Aemond’s eye narrowed as he spoke bitterly, looking down to his hand again where he twisted the ring more agitatedly, twist, twist, twist, pause, “Would taunt me about it. Fuck them in our bed. Would tell me I needed to ‘man up’ if I wanted to stay with her, told me I needed to be better for her, do better.” Aemond sighed, taking the last drag of the smoke, clearing his throat, “We were together for years, and she was all I knew. I didn’t-“
How could she have done this to him?
How could anyone have done anything like this to a person?
It was cruel. Inhumane. Horrible. And suddenly, the way Aemond behaved, his insecurities about Cregan, his jealously and refusal to let you get close began to make more and more sense.
You watched as his adams apple bobbed in his neck, “I didn’t know how to leave. I didn’t want to leave. Because when she was good, she was amazing. She was everything I wanted, everything I thought I deserved. Everything she made me believe I wanted. But when it was bad, it was…” Aemond trailed off, words caught in his throat, emotion beginning to boil over, "We would fight all the time. She would break things, cuss me out, tell me I was pathetic.” He swallowed again, voice quieter, “Hit me… And I was just an idiot in love who stood there and took it.”
Your chest ached painfully and you felt tears pull in your eyes.
Aemond.
You frowned, “You weren’t an idiot,” You said quietly, “You were in an abusive relationship, Aemond.”
The Targaryen blew air sharply through his nose, “I knew it was toxic and yet I stayed. Hoped it would get better. Waited for her to see that I was the only one she needed. That I could be good for her. Be better. I just- I thought we could be happy, like she promised. She was my first- And I-“ The silver haired man cleared his throat to sip at his tea.
“I’m sorry.” You whispered to him, tears threatening to spill over, “I am so, so sorry, Aemond. You didn’t deserve that.”
“I don’t want your pity,” He said quietly back, ego wounded, lingering pieces of denial and pain preventing him from being more vulnerable than he was, preventing him from letting anyone to see him as a victim, "I don’t want you apologising to me either. I deserved it.”
Your heart raced in your chest, “You didn’t-“
“-Could you for one second in your life not make excuses for me? I don’t want you to- I don’t- I feel-“ Aemond paused, not sure how to find the words, not sure how to move forward, and so you gave him a different path.
“How did you leave?”
The signet ring tapped loudly against his mug of tea.
Tink. Tink. Tink.
“Mum called, told me Viserys was sick, it looked bad at the time,” You noted how he called his dad by his first name, “I didn’t know how to feel about it. I was… lost. And Alys didn’t even care. Didn’t care that my… father… was sick. Didn’t care that he was dying. I stopped my studies for her, I left everything behind for her. Friends. Family. Everything. And she didn’t even care. She just asked how much I would inherit, asked if I would get the law firm. She- she didn’t- she just-“
Your hand lifted before you could stop it, setting it against his shoulder gently. Aemond’s entire body bristled, as though your touch had sobered him up, and you watched in disappointment as the brick walls began to build behind his eye again.
“That’s horrible. Really, you didn’t deserve any of that. Your partner is supposed to love and support you. Listen to you. Be there for you. I’m sorry that you were so alone.” You empathised, “She sounds ho-“
“-Don’t.”
Even in his weakest of moments, even when in times of pain or reminiscing on the abuse, Aemond still would not let anyone say anything about Alys.
The good, the bad, or the ugly.
It was his to talk about.
And his alone.
“I know,” He continued, looking at your carefully, his silver lashes brushing against his cheeks as he momentarily looked down at your hand on his shoulder, and then back up at you.
The way he gazed at you made your chest constrict, “-I know that you probably don’t care about this,” You shook your head and Aemond sighed inwardly, “But I needed to tell you. To explain. I don’t want sympathy, or for you to make excuses for me. You said-... I listened to what you said. I'm trying, Y/n. In the only way I know how.”
You let your thumb rub his shoulder soothingly before you stepped towards him, your shoulder brushing his as you both looked out the kitchen window into the dark of the night, a blanket of quiet enveloping around the two of you, only this time, it wasn’t uncomfortable.
If he was sharing, then you would too.
“I caught Jason cheating on me with his now girlfriend, I think I told you that once. Caught them in our bed together, and he blamed me for it.” You breathed, lifting the tea to your lips, finding your mouth suddenly dry, “It wasn’t the first time though. But it was the last time. I knew he had a reputation but I ignored it. Fools in love, you know?”
Aemond nodded his head and huffed a quiet, bitter laugh.
“He was just so charming, and when I met him on campus, all the girls chased him, but he chose me. And it made me feel special, to have him choose me like that over them. Such a stupid pick me moment now that I look back at it." You scoffed quietly, "I think I was just so caught up on actually being desired… I know now that he didn’t. He was still sleeping with them, but still. I get what you mean about staying, hoping for better. I mean- I obviously- He never- He didn’t physically-“
“-It’s okay. I know what you mean.” Aemond reassured you, and you felt your heart quieten from its speeding pace.
You continued, “But I was never isolated. I was never alone. I had my friends. I had Hel. And if we are truly being as candid as I think we are being right now, I had a family who was there to support me, which I feel that you perhaps didn’t.” You looked down at your mug, watching the way the teabag shifted in the cooling water, Aemond’s gaze on you.
He lifted the cup to his lips and drained the last of the dregs of tea before settling it on the window sill, eye cast to the dark, then back to you, then out to the dark again in contemplation.
“I heard Cregan tell you about what happened to me.”
Anxiety and regret poured through you.
What else had he heard?
“Viserys had always been sick.” He explained, and you knew this already from what Helaena had told you, “Growing up, he was always at the doctors and the specialists, and was never really there. But in all honesty, I don’t think, even without the illness, that he would have been there. He-“ Aemond fiddled with the ring on his finger, family insignia pressed into its centre.
Twist, twist, twist, pause. “He never really got over his first marriage. Never got over the death of his first wife, Aemma. And I think,” You watched him lick his lips, “I think mum was a convenience to him. They married for convenience. She was more caregiver than wife… I mean, he loves her. I know he does. But he could have done more. And he never really paid attention to me and Aegon. Helaena he adores, but even then, their relationship is strained, not what it should be.”
Helaena often told you about her want for their father to spend more time with the boys, but he seemed to never have much interest in them. Not once giving Aegon, Aemond or Daeron the praise they needed, and only ever being cynical in their achievements, stating that they could be doing more, or that they were doing not enough.
This of course led to the way Aegon came to be the way he was.
Aemond chewed at his bottom lip, “A few years back I went to visit him. And mum. Went with Hel and Aegon. Daeron couldn’t come because of his studies. But we went together, a united front, and I just- I had this child’s hope that he would see me. But he was barely lucid on painkillers that he didn’t even know who I was. But he remembered Rhaenyra.” His voice got darker, resentment and anger and sorrow swirling on the tip of his tongue, “Said to her, in front of all of us, ‘My only child’.”
Your mouth gaped open.
Aemond spared a glance at you and shook his head, laughing bitterly, “Aegon laughed, but you could tell it stung, being the eldest boy and all. He just laughed and then drank himself into a stupor. Hel was quiet, and I-“ He rolled his shoulders back, “I just left. I don’t know what I was expecting.”
His voice shifted, brows furrowing as his lips twitched at the sides, pulling into a tight flat line. It was an attempt to not sneer as clear as day, “But Rhaenyra, she tried. She tried to say we were there, tried to explain to him. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her defend us like that, but it was no use. It was too late. We didn’t grow up together, we didn’t have that kind of bond. I know mum had a play in it. And after the incident, I guess it was just better for all of us that we parted ways."
You nodded, knowing all too well about this.
“When I lost my eye, it was an accident.” Aemond’s voice got quieter as his fingers traced the scar on his cheek and brow in memory, “And Cregan told you the rest, but he doesn’t know about what happened after. I had no-one.” He breathed, and you felt yourself shifting closer to him, hoping your presence would give the man some sort of comfort for the words that seemed to continue to spill forth from his lips in an endless stream of cathartic release. Thoughts and feelings that he had told you had not even been uttered to his sister.
“Mum was so hellbent on taking Rhaenyra to court that she didn’t stop or spend time with me when I was recovering in hospital. The only person there was Criston, and that was because mum made him. Hel, Aegon and Daeron went back to school, and I stayed in the hospital alone. I can’t- I don’t-”
Aemond swallowed, eye shutting as he stood to his full height, “I’m tired. I’m going to go to bed.”
Anxiety wound a coil in your gut.
Had he said too much?
Does he regret speaking to you?
Would he go back to being cold again? Quieter?
Your hand shot out before you could stop it, grabbing his larger one in your own. You watched as Aemond flinched slightly, hand flexing before it relaxed in yours. You soothed his knuckles with your thumb, anchoring him to the spot with you.
You swallowed, “Come to bed.” You said quietly, watching as his face moved through a myriad of emotions.
Shock, confusion, anger, and then finally, disgust.
“You think I want to f-“
“-No!” You said loudly, realising the accidental implication, before you lowed your voice again, “No. No, I- Just lay with me. Nothing else. I-“ You swallowed, “I don’t want you to be alone right now.”
Aemond blinked at you softly, his face falling, “I’m always alone.” He whispered.
Your heart tugged in your chest.
You squeezed his hand gently, “You don’t need to be.”
The air around you shifted, Aemond staring down at you as you held his hand in the dark of the kitchen, unspoken words floating around the two of you. But in that moment, you didn’t need to say a thing.
Aemond nodded his head down at you, almost imperceptible, and your heart thumped in your chest as you led him towards your bedroom in the dark, not letting go of him until you pulled the sheets back and crawled in first, urging him to climb in after you.
If it was not for the sadness that permeated around the two of you, you would have laughed at how large Aemond was in your bed, taking up most of one side as he was on. He lay flat on his back, crossing his hand over his chest, unsure of what to do.
You took initiative and curled up against him, lifting one of his arms over your shoulder as you settled into the heat of his side. You let one hand rest against his chest, feeling it rise and fall as he breathed quietly.
Aemond was stiff, unsure, uncertain, as you laid against him, lifting your hand from your chest to brush through his hair, an attempt to soothe the man with gentle strokes and repetition. You wondered briefly if Alys ever comforted him like this after their fights. After her infidelity.
You then wondered with a stray thought, if Aemond had ever been comforted ever in his life.
His hair was silky against your palm and fingers as you brushed your hand through it, nails scratching lightly at his scalp. You heard him breathe deeply, a small groan falling from his lips, the tension in his body slowly leaking from him.
You repeated the motion over and over, and eventually Aemond softened, his head tilting towards you in the dark of the room. Although you could scarcely see his gaze, you knew that he was watching you, only small pieces of light from the moon coming through the cracks of your curtains.
Heat rolled over you as you felt him observing you.
Aemond shifted in your sheets, hand coming to reach for yours in his hair, long fingers wrapping themselves around yours warmly, calloused palm rubbing over the top of your hand delicately.
With your hand in his, he brought it away from his silver tendrils, dragging it down slowly as he looked at you in the dark, moonlight shrouded over his body, just barely illuminating him as his lips parted, pressing a kiss into the palm of your hand. Your breath stilled in your throat as he did it again, tenderly, softly, reverently, before his mouth slid upwards, bottom lip dragging against your skin, goosebumps erupting over your skin.
Aemond pressed another gentle kiss to the tips of your fingers, a bare breath of air puffing over the digits as he tilted his head, pressing another to your inner wrist, right above your pulse point. You wondered momentarily if he felt the way your pulse quickened, blood thumping in your veins against his plump lips.
It wasn’t long until he dragged your fingertips back to his mouth, but this time, instead of the cautious and soothing kiss he had placed there before, his teeth now nipped at the pad of your pointer slowly. Not sharply with unconfined lust, but rather as if he was testing the waters, and when no argument came from your lips, nor objection to his indication to his now aroused state, Aemond leant forward towards your face, still holding your hand in his.
His lips met the corner of your mouth, barely there, yet full of yearning. You tilted your head upwards, to give him access to you, to which he pressed a softer kiss squarely upon your lips. You felt him breathe out through his nose in a shudder, your eyes slipping closed, not that you could see much anyway, as you kissed him back, cautious, curious, letting him set the pace.
There was no rush in the way he held you, sliding your body towards him with a large palm, hand spread against your ribs and waist, fingers ever so often tensing as he began to slowly deepen the kiss. But this was different to your previous times kissing Aemond. There was no malice, no rush, no anger simmering beneath the surface with resentment and confusion of the dynamic between the two of you.
These kisses that he pressed against your lips were slow, sensual, as though time had stopped for the two of you, and it spoke multitudes that Aemond was content to just bask in the warmth that spread between the two of you, his hand still holding yours, thumb pressed into your palm like a pressure point.
It was a side of him you had never seen before.
And you were content to leave it at that, to just hold him and kiss him in a way that he clearly needed in that moment, not wanting to move it forward, nor push either of you to go to someplace that the previous conversation in the kitchen would deter you from. But Aemond was not as content as you had thought he was.
His hand slid down your side, moving to cup under your ass as he dragged a leg over his side, nestling his hips between yours. You whimpered softly into his mouth as you felt his hardened length brush against your inner thigh.
Aemond taking this as the permission he needed, began to grind up against you, lips chasing yours lazily, keeping the same slow rhythm as before, matching the pace of his hips as he ground up against you, small gasp falling into your mouth from his as his hips stuttered.
He skimmed his hand from your thigh up your body, never breaking away from your embrace as he explored your body slowly, making your body out with careful precision. Each drag of his finger over your curves stored into the back of his mind for later.
Over the top of your sleep shirt his hand found your breast, hot air puffed through his nose as he squeezed, a mewl dripped hotly from your lips as you arched your chest into his hand.
He twinged a nipple between fingers, sending sparks through your body straight to your core, your leg dragging his hips closer to your heat as you bucked up into him, wetness pooling into your sleep shorts.
A hand slid itself underneath your shirt, feeling the away your stomach clenched beneath it as it moved upwards, finally resting over your chest. He splayed his fingers across your skin, feeling your heart race beneath his palm.
Your cheeks were heated, and Aemond finally broke away from the tender kiss that you had been sharing. Your eyes fluttered open, blinking to adjust in the darkness as you breathed shallowly, looking at him.
The air around you was static, and you got the sudden urge to pull back, to retreat, that this was too intimate, that you were showing too much of your hand to him, too much of yourself to him and what you truly desired.
As if sensing your sudden caution, the hand that held yours dragged itself down his own chest, his lips pressing into the corner of your lips before he settled your hand under his own shirt and above where his heart was.
Beneath your palm, you felt the same erratic heartbeat that was racing through your own chest, but this time, in his. Your fingers tightened against his skin, feeling bone and muscle, and a light dusting of hair beneath, but under all of that was the undeniable truth that Aemond wanted this just as much as you did.
Bringing your lips back to his you kissed him, both of your hands staying above each others chests warmly as you rolled your hips into his, a soft grunt coming from deep within Aemond throat.
With slow hands, Aemond took off your pants, aiding by your own hands as you slid them down your legs, kicking them to the bottom of the bed sheets where they were lost and would be found later. He then shifted, breaking away from the embrace as he took off his own pants, followed by his shirt, awkward movements jolting the bed that you would have normally giggled at if it wasn’t for the sincerity of it all.
And then you were back together, skin pressed against skin and anticipation buzzing through you like electricity. He held your jaw in both of his hands as he dragged you back to him, one hands fingers curling into your hair at the nape of your neck.
You were lost to his touch, growing dizzy from desire as he dragged your leg over his hip once more, slotting his hips against you. You felt his hard length brush against your folds, your chest pressing into him as you breathlessly whined into his mouth. Your hands slipped around his shoulders as you pulled him impossibly closer.
Aemond tilted his head, resting his forehead against yours.
Hot air puffed against your lips as he whispered, “Is this okay?”
You nodded, capturing his lips with yours once again as he took a hand to drag between the two of you, parting your folds in test to see if you were wet enough, and also to help guide his length blindly to your sopping centre.
Aemond pushed into you with one long and slow thrust, a sharp inhale sucked into the both of your chests, mouths opened as you paused from your kiss, lips still brushing against each other as you felt his length fill you completely.
His cock stretched you out thickly, his chest brushing against yours with every restrained breath he took.
Blood rushed in your ears, your pulse quickening as he pulled back, dragging his cock through your folds before back up inside of you. Your leg over his hip dragged higher as you pulled him closer, giving him a better angle to reach deeper within you.
The tip of his length brushed over every inch within you, a dreamy sigh falling from your lips as you nipped at Aemond’s mouth. He repeated the motion, slowly pushing his hips up into yours before dragging them backwards, leaving just his tip inside of you before he would plunge back inside.
You both pulled away from your kiss, foreheads pressed against each other as you breathed and whined, emotion pouring from him, his shoulders still tensed beneath your arms.
You tried to soothe him, running your fingers along the nape of his neck experimentally pressing into the thick cords of muscle at the back, at times rewarded by a small mewl from him before you settled to just tug lightly at his hair.
His thrusts never sped up, keeping the same restrained pace as heat bloomed in your stomach.
All that could be heard was the wet of your folds as he dragged himself through them and the pleasure that sang from the both of your lips.
The coil within you began to wind, and following his actions from earlier, you pressed a gentle kiss to the corner of his mouth.
Aemond’s hips stuttered, and as he fucked into you sensually, all emotion and passion. You could feel the sadness that permeated from him, that creeped under his skin and into yours with every thrust or breathy whine. Your heart ached as you felt it, but you knew that this was what he wanted. That this was how he wanted to be comforted, that this was what he had chosen, and so you praised him as he sought his pleasure, and aimed to bring you to yours.
“So good.” You gasped against his lips, pressing a chaste kiss to his plump and bitten raw lips as you carded your hands through his hair softly, “Making me feel so good.”
A low whine escaped his chest, and you felt his length within you throb.
Your own coil was increasingly winding with every shift of his hips, every drag of his cock against the pleasurable spots within you, and the meeting of the soft dusting of curls at the base of his cock that brushed against your bud with every thrust.
“You feel so good, Aemond.” You praised huskily, cupping a cheek in your hand as you felt his thrusts finally begin to quicken, their steady pace crumbling from your praise and his nearing release.
His lips crashed into yours, desperate groan rumbling in his chest as a hand moved to wrap itself under your ass, pulling you closer, length pressing inside of you to its limit, spreading you wider apart on his length as he plunged inside.
The shift caused sparks to erupt in your gut, “‘M close.” You softly whimpered, “Want you to cum.” Your lips brushed against his as you spoke, his forehead pressed to your own as he quickened his pace.
“Please.” He trembled in your arms, hand splayed on the globe of your ass gripping the flesh tighter.
But no matter how close he got to his peak, he didn’t push himself over the edge and you could feel it.
He was waiting for you.
Waiting for your encouragement, waiting for your pleasure. But in that moment, you knew that Aemond needed it more than you. You would give him the permission he needed to hear.
“Let go.”
Aemond came with a shattered cry, hips stuttering into yours as he rode out his release, hot ropes of warmth flooding your core as you cooed him softly, brushing hair away from his forehead as you kissed his scarred cheek.
“So good.” You cooed quietly, “So beautiful.”
His body rippled as he pushed himself to his limit, hips pressed snugly against yours as he puffed breaths of hot air against your cheek. His head dipped down to where your neck meets your shoulder, stomach intermittently clenching at the aftershocks, your wet warmth still gripping him tightly.
Your heart raced in your chest as Aemond pressed lips to the junction of neck and shoulder, kissing softly, air puffing against your skin from his nose. You dragged your hands up and down his back soothingly, feeling goosebumps erupt from his skin, a soft whine pressed into your shoulder.
His cock twitched inside of you, causing a breathless sigh to fall from your lips, pleasure still settled within you. Aemond’s head lifted from the crux of your neck, eye finding yours in the darkness.
“You didn’t finish.”
It wasn’t a question, it was a statement.
You chuckled softly, careful to make it known that you weren’t laughing at him, “I don’t need to.”
His brows furrowed at you, and you smoothed at them with a thumb.
Aemond shifted, dragging his length from within you, mewling whimper escaping your lips as every vein and ridge dragged through your walls deliciously. But instead of Aemond pulling out, he pushed right back inside, fire erupting over your skin as your breath hitched.
He bit his lip, overstimulated but wanting to bring you to your peak as he slowly fucked into you again, dragging his tip over the soft spongey spot inside of you with precision. He pushed all the way in to the hilt, his tip pressing into your cervix as you moaned desperately, fingers digging into the skin of his back as you gripped him to you.
You could feel his spend dripping out of you, stickiness coating your thighs and his sack which were pressed against you tightly.
Aemond dragged a hand down your body disappearing between your thighs as he gathered some of his cum up to your clit, swirling his thumb around it softly in circles. You moaned softly, breasts pressing into his chest as he held you to him, not moving his cock, but using it to keep you full of him, feeling your walls twitch and spasm around him as he brought you to your peak with a sudden cry.
Your walls gripped him tightly as he hissed, slowing his thumbs movements to drag you through your release until you whined that it was too much.
Your body felt like jelly, unable to move, content to just lay in his arms, cock softening inside of you.
And so that’s what you did.
Neither of you uttering a word as to what had just happened, nor a whisper of what had been said, both laid in the dark, legs intertwined, the warm glow of your peaks settling over you as your hearts raced within your chests.
Thanks so much for reading along with me, if you wish to be added to the tag list please let me know :) Likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated ! Enjoy <3
Taglist:
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Bold is who I cannot tag
#aemond x reader#modern!aemond#aemond targaryen fanfic#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen fic#aemond#roommate!Au#roommates#hotd#hotd fanfic#hotd modern au#aemond x you#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond x y/n#Modern!Aemond x reader#new miniseries#asumofwords#aemond targaryen x y/n#the sublet a sum of words#the sublet#fanfic#hotdfanfic#aemondfanfic#aemond smut
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After the turgles all get out do any of them go low contact with Leo, at least at first? Leo reminds me a bit of my brother who I had to not talk to for a full year to finally get his head out of his ass lol
ALSO if they all live together after they get out how exactly do they all handle no longer depending on raph to do things? Like.. do the other turtles know how to do laundry? Or use a dishwasher? Does raph try to continue in his role of caretaker after they get out, even if the others tell him he doesn’t have to?
oooughhhgg, its rough, man.
they all kind of have really co-dependent relationships if im honest. it'd do them good to be away from each other for a while, but they're kinda scared to be separated. they've been fighting as a team for years now, and have lived together their entire lives before that. they mostly only feel safe when they're around each other. the only times they've been separated for long stretches have been when one of them is injured or hurt or something. PTSD type shit.
they all also have different ways of approaching conflict. Donnie wants to just ignore it and let it "heal" but that doesn't actually help him. he NEEDS to confront it to feel better. but he REALLY doesn't want to.
Raph is just so tired. he doesn't mind discussing his feelings but he almost doesnt know what to say. he always just feels tired and empty, he doesn't know where to start processing things.
Mikey is ecstatic to finally be free and spends the most time away from the apartment, I think. which is cool for him, but also makes things weird at home with Donnie, Raph, and Leo all being both volatile and allergic to sincere emotions. Not that it's mikeys JOB to mediate them but, like. it'd help if he was there before they start yelling :')
The others generally know how to take care of themselves, yeah. like, they CAN cook and do dishes and stuff if they have to (raph was also a kid so it's not like he could ever fully replace a parent. they all had to become self sufficient in some way or another) but they usually just.. don't. or they didn't usually, at first.
sso yeah, at first the labour does land a bit heavily on Raphs shoulders, which Raph doesn't complain about being who he is. It takes Casey's intervention (forcing Raph to relax/refusing to let Raph do all the chores haha) to get them to realize they should probably not perpetuate the dynamic of Raph cleaning up after them and cooking all their food now that they're away from splinter.
it's awkward tho cause so much of the abusive dynamics between them are just assumed, since that's how it's always been.
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First Post
Hey baby! I love you!!!! I decided to use this blog for #good and start to describe what life is like for you as you navigate this healing journey.
I was kinda crying about how I want to write my book but wondering what would be a good #text alt so that I can write it while laying in bed on these high pain days and voila! Here you are!!! A beautiful, wonderful, completely empty tumblr url I have been saving for you for years. And now, here it is! All for you to use however you see fit! Fuck an audience, fuck the readers, fuck your ego! I am writing in a way that feels authentic to you as you write it, and that is what means a lot to me < 3
Today you are having a lot of right hip pain. You feel useless because you’re not depressed, you WANT to do things, but you feel scared of the pain you feel. It doesn’t even super hurt, it’s just scary to not fully be able to feel, so you don’t really actually know if you’re moving something in the wrong way.
I just got off the phone with your physical therapist and she has given you 3 exercises that help your hip but hurt your back. It’s hard to stick up for yourself when you know someone is giving their best, and you don’t want to disappoint them. You’re doing your best, and I’m proud of you. Finding what works and what doesn’t, getting more outside help, listening to me on the inside- even and especially when it’s hard.
I know you want to work. I know you want to help. Maybe the best way you can help me and others on days like these, are to just write me little things like this :3
Today you are grateful that your dad mows your lawn, that the sun is shining, that you have a job that pays you when you’re sick, that you can lay in the sun, and that you have a plethora of fresh vegetables readily available for purchase at the grocery store.
I dream of living a life of leisure, one where I’m able to go to the beach or Disneyland whenever I please. I dream of every day mobility, and sandy beaches with shimmering waters to bathe in. I dream of a family I can support on my own.
For now I am just so grateful. Grateful for the mobility I do have, grateful for blue skies clear enough to swim in, and grateful for a dishwasher. I am so proud of you for doing what you need to take care of yourself, even if it is so hard it bruises your ego, your pride. You are wading through this life cautiously, trying to protect yourself from any further harm. I will find you the courage to fully saturate yourself in this life. I will build confidence and strength.
How strange that looks like taking an afternoon nap in the sun with your cat, lol
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96/100 continued.
So, about my coffee paraphernalia.
I had a 4-cup drip coffee maker. Phillips brand. Nothing special. Got it about 20 years ago. Still worked fine. Coffee was mediocre and never hot but it did the job. Well, recently I cracked the spout of the decanter. So that had to be tossed.
I thought about getting a replacement decanter. But I couldn't find an exact match (did I mention the coffee maker was 20 years old?) I could order a different one and hope it would fit properly. But if it didn't, it would be a waste of time and money, and I'd have an orphaned decanter.
First, though, I asked in my local Buy Nothing group (do you have one of those in your neighbourhood?) if anyone had an orphaned 4-cup decanter. Got no response.
Then I got to thinking 🤔 The coffee maker is 20 years old. The coffee is ok, but not great. I'm the only one in my house that drinks coffee. When people come over, they bring their own coffee because mine is so bad, lol. Anyway, I rarely invite anyone over for coffee, I invite people to go out for a coffee. And then I splurge on a café au lait or a cappuccino.
I do have a large Turkish coffee pot. Do you know what Turkish coffee is? It's finely ground and brewed in a Turkish coffee pot. There is no filter. The top is foamy and you are left with grounds in your cup. My grandmother had a Turkish coffee pot and used to like making Turkish coffee for the two of us. I'm not sure if it was "authentic" Turkish coffee, but it was how she used to make it back home (Eastern Europe).
So I says to myself, I says, "Why don't you just use the Turkish coffee pot to make your morning coffee?" And I answered myself, "Because having unfiltered coffee every day is apparently bad for you." It's because of the oil in coffee. Don't take my word for it, do your own research, but I don't think it's a good idea for me to have unfiltered coffee every day.
So I went to the secondhand shop and found a French press for $3. I boil the water in the kettle first, pour it over the coffee grounds in the Turkish pot to brew, then pour the brewed coffee into the French press. I put a filter around the sieve and press it through like that.
I actually only use half a filter. I tear it in half. So the filters will now last me twice as long!
So then I no longer had a use for the drip coffee maker. I felt bad about just tossing it out, so I posted it in the Buy Nothing group. And someone took it! Their elderly relative needed a new coffee maker and the decanter he had fit! Win-win! I felt really good about that. ☺️
As a bonus, I regained some counter space. And the Turkish-French press coffee tastes much better than the drip coffee 👍
So anyway. Now I just need to throw out the coffee grounds and filter, and rinse out the pots. Also, just a couple of things that just need a rinse: bread knife; berry basket and container I used to rinse strawberries in this morning; an empty container that had cookies in it.
And done! The mug and the little square pan can go in the dishwasher when it's empty.
Also washed out the crockpot. It was easy to wash, because I had already wiped out all the grease with paper towel, then scrubbed down with baking soda, right after emptying the contents after dinner the other night. Here's a tip, scraping everything out and wiping up grease with paper towel BEFORE washing will make the actual washing very much easier. Water and oil don't mix; the greasier it is, the more dish soap you will need, and the more water you will need to wash and rinse. Also, baking soda is amazing for all kinds of cleaning jobs. Cleaning up cooking grease is one of them. It will scrub off most of the baked on bits as well. If there are still baked on bits left, your best bet is to just let it soak overnight.
Now... time for a healthy snack!
Not sure why the inside of the apple is pink but it tastes really good.
#100 days of productivity#100dop#to do list#chores#kitchen#cleaning#procrastination#coffee lover#coffeetime#coffee#turkish coffee#french press#drip coffee#thrift store#thrifty#dishwashing#baking soda#cleaning with baking soda#cleaning tips
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In Reality
Request by @nosfera1 : hiiiii is your request open? i was wondering if i could ask for an angsty wanda x fem!r fic where they've been in a relationship for a year and r is absolutely head over heels with her. r planned their anniversary date and during that dinner wanda confesses that she's only been dating r to move on from her previous relationship the whole time and cant carry it in her conscience anymore? make it reaaally really heart wrenching as possible please. thank youuuuu
Ah, thank you so much for sending in your request!! (Yes, requests are open lol). I'm always excited to recieve a new request, especially for a character I have yet to write for!
I hope I get this the way you want! ❤
Warnings: Angst, feels, fluff (but like, fake?)
ฯฯฯ
"Wan, are you okay?" You asked, noticing your girlfriend looking a bit uncomfortable. Her hands were in her lap, her eyes staring at the table or the wall, and she seemed like she was zoning in and out. "Wanda?"
"What? Oh, yes, dear?" She asked, jerking up from looking at the muted paisley tablecloth.
"I was wondering if you were okay." You repeated.
"Yes, I'm alright, dear. Just a little tired is all." She said, showing her teeth in a smile that almost seemed forced. You chose to ignore it.
"I was going to say, but I didn't want to be rude." You said, chuckling.
"We've been together for a year, we can tell each other anything."
"I'm glad you feel that way."
The waiter brought your dishes not long after that, the thin veil of steam curling off the top of the Italian dishes you ordered. Your glasses were refilled and parmesan was grated on top of your meals.
You started nearly scarfing down your food, the wait having been a little too long without a breadstick refill. You watched Wanda gently cut through the meatballs on the top of her pasta, dividing them into quarters. The delicate movement entranced you for a moment, a bashful smile creeping onto your face.
To say you loved Wanda would be a severe understatement. The past year you had been together was the best year of your life. Before, you had been in a slump, everything seeming sad and dreary. You had been having a particularly bad day that day, as a matter of fact. You missed the bus in the morning, so you had to walk to work. Halfway through, it started raining buckets and you had no umbrella. You were lucky your boss was so understanding, else she would have reprimanded you for sure for being late. Still, the woman signed your paychecks; staying on her good side was in your best interest.
While pondering your latest excuse for being late to work again, it suddenly stopped raining.
No, someone was holding an umbrella over you.
That someone happened to be Wanda, offering her umbrella to you to shelter from the storm. You took one look at her and it was as if the color started to soak back into your previously grey world. Not only was this woman going out of her way to help you, she was beautiful as well.
Wanda held the umbrella over your head while you both walked to where you worked (she didn't mind in the slightest; she didn't have a set destination when she started walking). You told each other a few things about yourselves to pass the time. You were working at your current job until you could afford to move to a better part of the city. The apartment you lived in currently had a lot of small problems that would pop up every now and then that would take your savings. Your dishwasher had just broken and you needed to save up to get that replaced.
Wanda told you about things in her life, too. Her brother had died a few years ago in what she called a "tragic accident." Her last relationship had ended pretty suddenly more recently, so she took frequent walks to give herself something to do.
Suddenly your dishwashers woes seemed so nominal.
You arrived at the building you worked at and Wanda bid you goodbye. Though, not before passing you a small slip of paper with a few digits on it you recognized as a phone number. You went pink and walked into your office, sending a text to Wanda as soon as you sat down. You saw each other more frequently after that, going on your first date not long after.
And here Wanda was, sitting in front of you with her steaming pasta and quarter sliced meatballs. You ate your dinners in silence to start, the only noises between you two being the scratches of utensils on plates and quiet chewing.
After a few minutes, you noticed Wanda poking at her pasta with her fork. She hadn't eaten very much. Her chin rested on her other hand, the food on her plate starting to cool down.
"Wan, are you sure you're okay?" You asked. "You've barely eaten anything."
"I'm fine..." Wanda replied, letting out an exhale as if she were holding her breath. She put the fork down and rested her hand on the table.
"Wanda, it's okay. If something's bothering you, you can tell me." You said, resting your hand on top of hers. She took it, rolling your fingers in hers. She pulled her hand back and rested it in her lap, her other hand following suit. She took a breath.
"Y/N, can I tell you something?" She asked.
"Anything, Wan." You said. Wanda took in another breath and looked you in the eyes. That's how you knew she was getting dead serious with you.
"This isn't easy but... I can't keep holding it in. I can't do this anymore." She said.
"Can't do what?"
"This." She wagged her finger in between the two of you. Your breath hitched in your throat.
"What do you mean? You can't do--?" You asked, your voice cracking slightly.
"No, I can't." Wanda cut in. "Listen, Y/N, I'm telling you this now so I don't hurt you worse later on. I can't keep stringing you along."
"'Stringing me along?' Wanda, I don't understand. Don't you love me?"
"I... I... No. It's just..." Wanda bit her lip and averted her gaze from you.
"Just what? Something I did? What did I do, Wanda?"
"Nothing! You did nothing! It's not you, Y/N, it's just..."
"Wanda, are you joking? One year, Wanda! This is our one year anniversary and you're telling me this now??" You asked, the tears streaming down your face through your anger.
"I know, it's not ideal, but I couldn't find time to tell you before!"
"Couldn't? Or wouldn't? You're telling me you lied to me for a year, Wanda. Why?"
"Because I needed a distraction, okay? My last relationship ended badly and I was having a hard time getting over it. I thought you would... provide support until I could get back on my feet." Wanda admitted. Your face got hotter as the realization sunk in. Your voice got low as you continued speaking.
"You used me? You dated me to get over someone else? Is that all I was to you? Just a distraction? A plaything?" You growled.
"Y/N, you don't understand--"
"Oh, no, I understand plenty, Wanda." You stood up from your seat, throwing on your jacket and grabbing your handbag. You looked at the half empty water glass at your seat and picked it up. You examined the water inside for a moment, looking at Wanda over the rim. "I'd throw the water in your face right about now, but unlike you, I have standards on how people should be treated. Like a person with feelings and not something you use to play pretend with."
You downed the rest of the water and put the glass back on the table.
"Y/N--" Wanda said weakly, but you cut her off with a pinch of your fingers.
"Not another word, Wanda." You snapped, before turning around to walk away. "Don't even try to call me."
You burst out of the restaurant and sat down on one of the stone benches out front. You sent a quick text to your friend asking for a ride home, sending the address. Wanda had driven you here.
"What happened to your date?" Your friend asked.
"I don't wanna talk about it."
"Alright. I'm on my way."
You shut off your phone and stared up at the sky. Not a moment later, thunder rumbled above you and it started to rain.
You had no umbrella to cover you.
Finally, you allowed yourself to cry, your tears mixing with the rainwater that dripped onto your face. You let everything out, all the anger and sorrow until your throat went raw.
The headlights of your friend's car pierced through the wall of rain. You stood up and ran over, climbing inside of the heated car. You let out a sigh and leaned back against the seat.
"You okay?" Your friend asked. You didn't reply, just turned to look out the window, the raindrops gliding down it. As the car started pulling away, someone ran outside of the restaurant, screaming your name.
Wanda.
You looked at her as your friend pulled out of the parking lot. Wanda caught sight of you inside the car, watching you leave. You just stared back at her coldly as your friend whisked you away back home.
As soon as you got back to your apartment, you blocked Wanda's number and collapsed onto your sofa. Tears leaked down your face as you fell asleep.
ฯฯฯ
Hope you enjoyed this, nosfera!
As always, requests are open, so send them in!
#marvel#movies#avengers#wanda maximov#wanda marvel#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff#wanda maximov x reader#wanda x reader#wanda maximoff x fem!reader#female reader#wanda x fem!reader#fishgills writing#writing request#my inbox is open
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Lock-down Kisses
i wasnt almost gonna do day 11 but i got inspired late last night.
im also so glad that you guys liked my fic yesterday, it has been a bit of a stressful week for me so it makes me happy when you guys like my fics! it really means a lot so thank u! :)
cw: none. just some usual fluff lol
1.4k words
enjoy!
Aelin was so damned bored. She was sure she'd never been this bored in all her life.
She had to tell herself constantly that she was lucky, that she had a roof over her head, food in the fridge and pantry and that she was healthy and walking around, that she still had her job, no matter how rocky it currently was, she was still lucky.
It still didn't change the fact that being in lock-down rutting sucked.
It had been a month since the hard lock-down started and she had been stuck at home—her beautiful, sturdy home that she was damned privileged to have—somewhere in-between the mood of wanting to do something but not having the energy to actually do it.
She had already vacuumed and put the clean dishes away and the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. She had done a fresh load of laundry and put it outside to dry. With nothing left other than mopping (which she hated because no matter how hard she cleaned the tiles beforehand, there was always little pieces of debris that showed up and annoyed her to no end), she couldn't really think of any other house-chores for her to do to keep her preoccupied.
She mowed yesterday, and had racked up the leaves and grass too, plopping them in the garden bin. She watered the garden and refilled the bird-bath, as well.
There were plenty of books to read and listen to, but Aelin just wasn't in the mood for that, which surprised Rowan when she said that yesterday when she complained for the umpteenth time that she was slowly going insane—Aelin was always in the mood to read, but now...maybe it was because the people in those books were having adventures while she was stuck inside.
Right now, she was lying on the couch, staring at her plain as dust ceiling, wondering if it would break protocol if she could pay her neighbour Feyre to paint something enticing.
It probably would be, but she needed something pretty to stare at if she wasn't reading or watching television.
Again, she was grateful, because she had books to read and television to watch, but Aelin always liked to be doing something, being outside and running errands and working.
She was a teacher at Orynth dance and music studio, and due to the lock-down, she was unable to teach dance, but thankfully, she was still able to conduct piano, guitar and violin lessons over Zoom, even if it wasn't really the same and her laptops speaker made the music sound a little dingy, but she didn't have any lessons this week, but would next week, so at least she had something to look forward to.
To pass the time, she had resorted to snooping, watching people mill about in the street from the safety of her enclosed verandah and telling Rowan of the details that she observed when he had a moment of free time.
Which was practically non-existent, thanks to being a teacher and having to deal with stressed out senior students who constantly needed to be reassured that everything was going to be okay.
Not that Aelin could blame them for their stress, she felt so damned sorry for those kids, hyperventilating because they couldn't concentrate at home because they had to share the office with others and how terrified they were of flunking and just about everything else that caused them stress. But Rowan was there, reassuring them that everything would be okay and that as a team, they would tackle everything one day at a time.
Which was why when Aelin went to give Rowan a fresh cup of coffee earlier she was surprised to see that her husband was not in the study and that the room was empty. His laptop and papers were all set up for another day of virtual learning, but her husband could not be found, and she had gone throughout their entire house looking for him and did not find him. And it wasn't like he was hard to spot, he was over six feet tall, tanned and had silver rutting hair, but he was nowhere.
When she had gone back to the kitchen to add sugar and cream to his coffee that was now hers, she noticed that his joggers were gone by the front door, which made her frown because he hadn't mentioned going for a walk—not like he had to tell her everything she did, but she wouldn't have minded joining him—and came to the decision that maybe he just needed to clear his head before another stressful day was upon him.
At least it was Friday, not that that really meant anything when one was a teacher.
Aelin glanced around her living room, she had rearranged it two Saturdays ago with Rowan's help and maybe wondered if she could re-arrange it again, but decided that would just be ridiculous.
Maybe yoga would be a good idea, she didn't mind it and it at least gave her mind something else to focus about other than viruses and death and all other manners of unpleasantness.
So deciding that yoga was the best thing to prevent her from going to the roof and swapping out the tiles, Aelin got dressed, grabbed her things and went outside.
X X X X X X
Two hours later and Aelin was still outside. However, she gave up on yoga an hour ago, finding the energy to listen to a deliciously smutty audio-book. She was watching the clouds, but her mind was imaging that what was happening between the two lovers was her and Rowan (something that happened often when it came to these stories) and was about one paragraph from either shoving her hand down her pants or calling Rowan and asking him when the hell he was coming home so that they could recreate the scene when the front door opened.
Aelin jumped up and went back inside, barely remembering to turn off the audio-book and have her way with Rowan on the floor when she stopped dead at the sight of him.
Because in his hands hand was a leash, that was attached to a dog. A yellow lab, to be exact. The dog looked to be about six months old and was the cutest thing she'd ever seen.
“Rowan, why do you have a dog?”
“She's ours,” he said, like it was the most normal thing in the world. “I was supposed to pick her up from the shelter over a month ago, but she got sick, so I was told to wait until she recovered. She's okay now, perfectly healthy, so I finally got the call the other day that she was ready to be picked up. She's caught up on all the necessary vaccines, and is well trained. I was meant to be here earlier, but Fleetfoot here wanted to go swimming in a mud puddle, so I had to take her to a dog spa on the other side of town.”
Aelin nodded, her eyes still glued on the pup. Her eyes were a pretty golden-brown colour and while she was young, Aelin could tell that she was smart.
“You got us a puppy?” Aelin managed to ask.
“Yeah. I know you've been wanting one for a long time, and when I saw her pop up on my Facebook wall, I knew she was the one for us. Do you like her?” he asked and Aelin could have sworn that her burly husband sounded shy. Nervous.
“I love her,” Aelin admitted truthfully and finally went over to their dog, who immediately starting sniffing at Aelin's outstretched hand when she crouched down in front of her. And was soon being supplied with kisses, all over her hand, her face and neck. Aelin laughed and Rowan smiled, knowing that he had made the right decision.
Rowan was about to sit down himself when Aelin tugged at his hand, bringing him down on top of her and kissed him with every bit of love she felt for him.
It didn't take long for Fleetfoot to join them, licking at Rowan while she yipped for their attention. They broke apart and spent the rest of the day getting to know the new addition of their family.
Lock-down sucked, but Aelin was lucky indeed to have her husband in her life. And the pure ball of energy that was Fleetfoot.
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these little words (somehow they're changing us)
Christopher can make anybody smile, even when they feel like they can't.
Christopher Diaz Week, Day 7: ANYTHING CHRIS GOES + “I love you.”
Read on AO3 (This is a long one lol)
TW: For ‘Part 4: Harry’ there are mentions of a bully who teased Harry for having a gay dad.
1: Bobby
Washing up, Bobby could turn his back on the team and couldn’t be asked a million questions about how he was feeling. At home, with Athena and May, they spoke to him with their gentlest voices, then at work, the team did the same, it was too much.
The anniversary of the fire was creeping up, the single worst day of Bobby’s life, that he wished he could lock in a box and throw to the bottom of a lake.
He knew that his family cared.
It was why Athena was up early to make him breakfast every morning, why Hen and Chimney let him win their Mario Kart tournament, why Eddie did the grocery run, and why Buck saved him the last cupcake from the bundle Taylor had dropped off to celebrate Buck and Eddie’s engagement.
Those gestures, Bobby didn’t mind, but it was the talking; the mindless head tilts and the usual, “How are you doing?”
There was no answer for that, unless he lied, nodding his head, and saying he was doing okay, but when he closed his eyes, he saw his kids laying across those white sheets.
Bobby celebrated – internally, of course - when Eddie asked if Christopher and Carla could stopover for lunch. He adored Christopher, and so did everybody else, it was impossible not to. So, while everybody was distracted by Christopher’s wonderous tales, Bobby could escape the constant questions and the worried glances.
Running his hand through the lukewarm water, Bobby turned off the faucet and turned, swinging open the dishwasher.
He skipped over to the table, gathering as many plates as he could with two hands.
Christopher grabbed his empty plastic cup and jumped onto his feet, “I’ll help!”
Bobby couldn’t help but smile, “Thank you.” He turned, starting to place the plates into the dishwasher, “Those cups can’t go in here, do you wanna put it in the sink for me?”
“Okay!” Christopher bounced over, tossing the cup into the water, “I’m very good at washing up.”
Bobby raised his eyebrows, “Yeah?”
Christopher lowered his voice, “Better than Buck.”
Bobby pressed a hand on his stomach, barking a laugh, “I bet you are.”
Buck couldn’t wash up, not without making a mess; Eddie couldn’t cook, even after many one-to-one lessons with Bobby. Together, it worked.
Christopher stood on his tiptoes, looking into the sink, “Do you want my help?”
“Sure,” Bobby held up his hands, “I’ll grab the other cups.”
Before he could, Christopher was hugging him, locking his arms firmly around Bobby’s middle.
Bobby knelt, folding his arms behind Christopher’s shoulders, letting the kid press his chin on his shoulder, “Hey,” Bobby hung his head back, “What was that for?”
“I don’t know,” Christopher lifted his shoulders with a shrug, “But I think you needed a hug.”
A warmth spread across Bobby’s chest as a grin gradually grew across his face, “I guess I did.”
Christopher patted his shoulder, “Love you, Bobby.”
Bobby lifted his hands, ruffling Christopher’s hair, “Love you too, kid.”
Standing to collect the cups together, Bobby searched the room for Eddie, he found him on the couch, grinning up at his fiancée who had laid his legs across Eddie’s lap, trapping him. Eddie locked eyes with Bobby, nodding slowly, with a knowing smile, he knew better than anyone that reassurance from Christopher was exactly what Bobby needed.
2: Maddie
Maddie understood that she couldn’t protect Jee-Yun from everything unless she planned to take helicopter parenting to the next most extreme level.
Jee-Yun was teething and despite knowing that her daughter would never remember the pain or the tears, it didn’t ease Maddie’s worry. She hated knowing that Jee-Yun was in pain, there was nothing she could do to soothe her, aside from cradle her, and buy her toys to chew on to her heart’s content.
“I know, baby,” Maddie pressed a kiss to Jee-Yun’s temple, “It sucks, doesn’t it?” Her daughter hung her head, wailing as loud as she could, Maddie tried to shush her, “Daddy’s sleeping.”
“No, Daddy’s awake,” Chimney emerged from the bedroom, with a yawn, he rubbed his eyes with the backs of his fingers.
“Oh, Chim,” Maddie squeaked her empathy, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not her fault,” Chimney clapped his hands, taking Jee-Yun into his arms, “It’s a part of growing up.”
She sighed, “But you have to work tonight.”
“I’ve had five hours,” He shrugged as he patted Jee-Yun’s back, “That’s enough.”
Maddie pressed her hands on her hips, trying to conceal a yawn, but it didn’t go unnoticed by Chimney, who raised his eyebrows, tilting his head to his shoulder, she jabbed a finger in his direction, “Shut up.”
Chimney laughed, “I didn’t say anything,”
There was a knock at the door.
Maddie narrowed her eyes, considering she hadn’t buzzed anybody in, she reached for the handle, pulling open the door.
She was greeted by three familiar faces; Buck, Eddie, and Christopher.
“Aunt Maddie!” Christopher locked his arms around her legs, greeting her in his usual fashion.
“Hey, honey,” She tapped his back as she darted her eyes up to her brother, “What are you guys doing here?” She asked through a yawn, “I thought you were venue hunting.”
“We are,” Eddie shrugged, “But not until later.”
Christopher headed inside, wearing a grin as he stopped by Buck’s side.
“So, we’re here…” Buck moved inside, pressing a kiss to Maddie’s cheek, “To help.”
Maddie raised her eyebrows, “Help?”
Buck pressed his hands together, resting them under his chin, as he turned on his heel, “Consider this an intervention.”
Maddie stepped closer to Chimney, “An intervention?”
Buck tilted his ear to his shoulder, “You two need sleep.”
“Desperately,” Eddie added as he pushed the front door shut, pressing a hand to his son’s back.
Chimney scoffed a laugh, “We’re fine.”
Buck snorted, “Sure.”
Eddie crossed his arms, “Is that why you look like you’re about to fall over?”
Chimney exclaimed, “Hey!”
“Now, there’s my favorite niece,” Buck held out his arms, scooping Jee-Yun, with a smile, not phased by her sobs, “Oh, no.”
Maddie sighed, “You really don’t have to do this.”
“We want to,” Eddie assured her, “You two deserve some time.”
“I mean,” Chimney met her gaze, “It’s basically free babysitting, right?”
“Yeah…” Maddie nodded, “Um, are you sure?”
Buck smiled, “Get some rest.”
Going into the bedroom, Maddie and Chimney fell onto their bed, not even bothering with the covers, curling into one another.
She couldn’t work out when she fell asleep, but Maddie was suddenly woken up, by somebody prodding her arm.
“What?” She turned, meeting Chimney’s tired gaze, “What is it?”
He raised his head, “Can you hear that?”
She couldn’t hear anything, “No.”
“Exactly,” Chimney mused, “Jee-Yun’s not crying.”
Maddie needed to see this, she sat up, crawling out of the bed, cracking the door open, and leaning her head out.
Jee-Yun was laying in the crib, blabbering happily, her eyes on the ceiling.
Eddie and Buck were dancing around the kitchen, finishing the washing up, while gazing into each other’s eyes, like they always did.
Maddie’s eyes found Christopher, who was kneeling beside the crib, poking his fingers through the slates, letting Jee-Yun grip onto one of them with all her might.
Christopher grinned, fascinated by his cousin, he sang, “Hey.”
Jee-Yun spun her head, watching Christopher, squeezing his finger as she did, she giggled loudly, staring at him like he held all the answers to the universe.
Christopher lowered his voice, whispering, “Love you, Jee.”
Tears filled Maddie’s eyes as she smiled, turning back to Chimney.
Jumping back into her bed, she couldn’t drop her smile.
Her family was the best.
3: Denny
Denny skipped into his bedroom, placing Christopher’s bag on the end of his bed.
They were having a double sleepover; two nights with Christopher, while Eddie and Buck were out wedding planning, which meant they could play games all day and talk through the night.
Christopher was having Denny’s bed while Denny took the inflatable mattress that they’d blown up by the window and covered in a spare quilt.
Denny bent beside the toy box, opening the lid, and searching for his new Star Wars Lego set to take into the living room. He stopped when he noticed something buried at the bottom, under the scrabble box, he dug his hands inside, pulling out a pink horse plushie, “Oh.”
It was Nia’s.
All his happiness was gone, Denny climbed onto his bed, laying on his side, hugging her horse under his arm as he let out a long sigh.
The bedroom door creaked, and Christopher asked, “What’s wrong?”
Denny hummed before saying, “Nothing.”
Christopher climbed up onto the bed, lying next to him, patting Denny’s arm, “I miss Nia too.”
Denny lifted his head, looking at his friend.
“It’s okay to miss people,” Christopher told him, “I miss my mom sometimes, but she’s not coming back, but she was here,” He squeezed the plushie, “Dad says that the important thing.”
Denny couldn’t imagine losing one of his moms; Christopher was one of the strongest people that he knew because he never stopped smiling.
“Nia is with her mom,” Christopher said, “She’s happy but she probably misses you too.”
Denny nodded slowly.
“You might see her again one day,” Christopher smiled, “That would be fun.”
“Yeah, it would,” Denny reached over, pulling Christopher into a hug, squeezing his eyes shut.
Christopher tapped his back, “I’m not going anywhere, Denny.”
“I know.” Denny scrunched his nose, “Love you, Chris.”
“Love you too.”
4: Harry
Harry was unloading the dishwasher, ignoring the glances that his mom and Bobby were sending his way as they muttered between themselves.
He knew he was in trouble, his parents had made that very clear when they collected him from school and grounded him, being suspended from school for a week was a big deal, he understood that.
He couldn’t tell them the whole truth, he knew how extravagant his parents were when they were angry, especially his mom. If he told Bobby, it would reach the station, and then everybody would be mad; he could already picture Hen and Buck storming the school with his mom.
Harry would rather handle it, by himself, and not stress his family out, yet. It wasn’t long until Eddie and Buck’s wedding, he didn’t want to put a dent in that, because it definitely would.
“Harry,” Bobby leaned on the kitchen surface, “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.” Harry closed the dishwasher, “I pushed Ben over; that’s all.”
“That’s all,” Athena muttered, shaking her head as she buried her hands in his pockets.
“We know you, Harry,” Bobby said, clearly being the ‘good cop,’ “You wouldn’t have just pushed him.”
Ben’s torments filled Harry’s head as he met his stepdad’s gaze.
Your dad’s got a boyfriend?
Harry shrugged, “It’s nothing, Bobby.”
That’s so gross.
Harry adored his family, that included David, and when Ben came for him, Harry saw red, pushing Ben to the ground; Ben had seen the engagement party pictures for Eddie and Buck on Harry’s Instagram, that added fuel to the fire, but Harry would defend his family until the end.
The doorbell rang.
Bobby hung his head, looking to Harry’s mom, “That will be the boys.”
Harry rolled his shoulders; he forgot that Buck, Eddie, and Christopher were visiting for dinner.
“Harry,” Athena said strictly, “Christopher’s gonna wanna play games with you, but no video games, you hear me?”
Harry nodded.
Athena put on a grin, skipped up the stairs, and opening the door, with a joyous, “Hey!”
“Sorry, we’re so early,” Buck said, “Christopher was very excited to see Harry.”
Harry stepped over with Bobby, looking up to the door, as his mom turned to face him, with a knowing glance.
“Well, Harry’s grounded,” She pressed a hand to her hip, “But if Christopher is okay with board games.”
“We love board games,” Eddie sang, “Don’t we, bud?”
Christopher jumped, “Yeah!”
“This way, Chris,” Harry nodded his head to the couch, pulling out the Scrabble and Monopoly boards from under the coffee table, as he sat down, leaning his back on the edge of the couch.
Bobby skipped into the kitchen, to prepare drinks, while the others sat at the dinner table, jumping right into talking about the wedding.
Harry was happy for the distraction while he played games with Christopher.
Christopher balanced his crutches on the floor before jumping down to see near Harry, he lowered his voice, leaning his head, “What happened?”
Harry lifted his hands, “I got grounded.”
Christopher muttered, “Why?”
“I pushed a kid over,” Harry told him as he got out the parts for Scrabble, laying the board across the table, “I don’t wanna talk about it.” The thing was, he did want to talk about it, he wanted everybody to know that he didn’t do it without a reason, but he couldn’t.
Christopher asked, “Was he a bully?”
Harry nodded, keeping his voice quiet, “Yeah.”
“Oh,” Christopher let go of a long breath, “Did he push you?”
“No,” Harry shook his head, “But—”
“He was mean?”
“Very.” Harry sighed, darting his eyes to his mom, who was caught up in her conversation, she wouldn’t be able to hear them, “Can I tell you what happened?”
“Yeah.”
“The kid, Ben, he was being mean,” Harry looked over at Buck and Eddie, before turning his face back to Christopher, “He said it was gross that my dad is gay.”
“That’s wrong!” Christopher cupped a hand over his mouth, shushing himself, “He can’t say that—”
“I know.”
Christopher held out his hands, “I would have pushed him over too.”
Eddie was on his feet, pacing over, “What did you say, Chris?”
Harry cursed their luck, he forgot that his parents could hear everything.
Christopher lied, “Nothing.”
“No…” Eddie shook his head slowly, “We all heard.”
Buck, like Bobby, seemed to take the role of ‘good cop’ so he stood back, crossing his arms, eyes locked onto the boys.
While Harry’s mom stepped over, stopping next to Eddie, the pair crossing their arms.
Christopher explained, “Harry pushed him because Ben was making fun of Michael for being gay.”
Harry sighed, slouching, as the adults were stunned into silence.
Harry’s mom met Eddie’s gaze, while Bobby clamped a hand on Buck’s shoulder.
“And—” Christopher breathed, “If somebody said that about you, I’d be mad.”
“Yeah, buddy, I know,” Eddie sighed gently, “Ben is wrong.”
“Harry,” Athena spoke softly, “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t wanna hurt Dad or David.”
“Still, sweetheart…” Athena sighed, bending down to cup his cheek in her hand, “You have to tell us these things, so we can understand.”
“Okay, Mom.”
“And pushing him over, wasn’t the best move,” She scolded, “But I get it, next time, you come to me, or one of your teachers, okay?”
“Yeah,” Harry nodded, “I will.”
“We’ll talk to your school tomorrow,”
Standing up, Bobby stepped over, wrapping an arm behind her back, pressing a kiss to her cheek.
Harry turned, tugging Christopher into a hug, “Thank you,” He whispered into his ear.
Christopher frowned, “Why?”
“For helping.” Harry pulled back, “I didn’t know how to tell them.”
“Ben has to be told off,” Christopher told him, “And he will be.”
“Yeah,” Harry tapped his friend’s shoulder, “He will.”
Christopher reached out, grabbing the bag of letters for Scrabble, he looked up with a smile, “Love you, Harry.”
Harry grinned, happy to have a friend in Christopher, “Love you too, Chris.”
5: Buck
Sometimes Buck would wake up, panicked by memories of the tsunami. In a few short months, it would be the third anniversary of when the wave came crashing down, and he couldn’t understand where the time had gone.
Buck could feel the rush of the water; the pressure gathering him up and pushing him back, away from Christopher.
The ringing in his ears, his heart racing in his chest, and his arms thrashing through the cold avoiding debris as he swept past, Buck remembered it all.
He leaned back in the chair at the kitchen table, slowing his breathing as his eyes found the clock on the wall.
4:48 am.
He was surprised he hadn’t woken Eddie when he got out of bed, his fiancé wasn’t exactly a heavy sleep, and usually, with the slightest hint of unfamiliar movement, Eddie would be up on his feet before Buck could reassure him that he was only getting up to grab a glass of water.
It had been two hours since Buck had left the bedroom, taking his place in the kitchen, to sit with a cup of cocoa and stare at the wall, thoughts running through his head, at a mile a minute.
Eddie hadn’t been distributed when Buck slipped away, likely because they’d had a long shift at work, and when they made it home, Eddie had been out like a light.
Buck rubbed his hand down his face, wanting nothing more than for Eddie to gather him up in his arms, and tell him that everything was going to be okay.
He knew that if he knocked on the door and woke Eddie, then he would be exactly what he would get; Eddie didn’t show it, but he was a softy at heart.
As much as Buck wanted that, he couldn’t.
Buck? Wait, what are you doing here? Are you okay? Wait, where's Christopher?
Memories of that day, that moment when he thought he’d lost Christopher and had to tell Eddie, they weighed heavy, keeping him sitting in the chair.
Me and Christopher, we were...at the beach, and--um...and listen to me, okay?
Oh, he’d never shake the look in Eddie’s eyes.
I swear to you... okay, I tried...
Tears filled his eyes, he brushed them away, bracing his fingers together and planting them on the table, as he slowed his breathing.
Buck had been in love with Eddie for as long as he could remember, but when that day, he thought any potential relationship was buried.
Eddie and Christopher were two of the most important people in Buck’s life, two who pulled him to shore while he was sinking fast. He let them down that day, let Christopher slip through his fingers, but his soon-to-be stepson was adamant that Buck was a hero, but he didn’t feel like one.
Shortly after the whole lawsuit debacle, Eddie caught Buck off-guard, asking him out on a date, and explained that he was done wasting time that they didn’t have.
Buck was sure that he’d never been happier, than in that very moment, and then a year later, Eddie asked him to marry him, that day quickly took the top spot.
Buck fiddled with his engagement ring, leaning his head against his hand as he shuddered, feeling like he needed to wade through water before he could make it back to bed.
Christopher’s tired voice caught his attention, “Buck?”
Buck plastered on a false smile, lifting his head, as he turned in his chair, “Hey, buddy.” He tried to clear his throat, but his voice came out hoarse, “What are you doing up?”
Christopher tilted his head, “Are you okay?”
Buck thought he could lie but as he stared into Christopher’s eyes he knew he could, but his words escaped him, so he simply shook his head, his lower lip trembling.
Christopher sped over, opening up his arms.
Buck crumpled to the floor, on his knees, collecting Christopher in a hug, tucking his forehead against his shoulder.
“It’s okay, Buck,” Christopher whispered in his ear, brushing his hand through Buck’s hair, “Nothing bad is going to happen.”
Buck squeaked, closing his eyes as he let out of a sob, “I’m sorry.”
“You can be sad,” Christopher assured him, “It’s normal.”
“Yeah,” Buck nodded as he clung on tighter, “It is.”
The bedroom door clicked open, and a half-asleep Eddie emerged, stopping by the wall, eyes on them.
Buck leaned, pressing a hand to Christopher’s cheek, “I love you, Superman.”
Christopher smiled, as wide as he could, “I love you too, Papa.”
Eddie raised a hand, laying it under his chin as he struggled to hide the fondest of grins.
Buck chuckled through his tears, as he clung onto Christopher, his feet finally on dry land.
6: Eddie
Eddie kept going to the mirror to make sure that his tie was positioned properly, if he sat still for too long, his leg started bouncing and his heart would race.
He’d been a groom before, but his and Shannon’s wedding was quick, not many people attended the ceremony, it was a spur-of-the-moment decision that the pair made together.
With Buck, Eddie knew that this commitment was one he was making, until the end; he and Buck were entangled, in more ways than one.
God, Eddie loved him, he really did; sometimes he’d focus on the time they’d lost while they were idiots who never discussed their feelings, but he couldn’t concentrate on that.
Buck was more than perfect because they were best friends first, and still were, to this day, which made that step to boyfriends, that much easier; Buck loved Christopher like his own, before he and Eddie were together, which was beautiful.
There's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you.
When Eddie had muttered those words, he should have realized, there and then, his true feelings but he left it too long, pushed his future further away.
He wouldn’t let that happen again.
That didn’t relieve the pressure that had rested on his chest, he was terrified of getting it wrong, or tripping up when he needed his balance the most.
He’d never considered the dangers of his job until he started counting the odds with Buck’s life, as well as his own.
He couldn’t lose another, his heart wouldn’t be able to take another blow, and Buck wasn’t exactly known for his level-headedness.
Despite that, since they started dating, both of them were far more responsible on calls, Bobby wished they’d been together since the beginning.
Christopher was sitting on the chair, in the corner of the room, dangling his legs in anticipation, “Are you okay, Dad?”
Eddie clapped his hands together, “I’m fine,” He rubbed the nape of his neck, “Just a little nervous.”
Christopher sang loudly, “It’s gonna be so cool.”
Eddie chuckled with a nod, “It is.”
“Pepa helped me with my speech,” Christopher beamed, happy with his Best Man role.
Eddie moved over, pushing Christopher’s hair out of his eyes, “You excited about that?”
“Yeah!” Christopher nodded, “Chimney is doing his first.”
Eddie rolled his eyes, knowing what that was going to entail, “He is, is he?”
“Then me!” Christopher exclaimed, “Auntie Karen typed it up on cards for me.”
Eddie smiled; this day was a serious family affair, “I can’t wait, buddy.”
Christopher chuckled, “Athena said Bobby will cry first today.”
“I bet,” Eddie sat beside him, breathing slow, leaning his arm against Christopher’s side.
“Dad,” Christopher held up his head, “You’re gonna be Eddie Diaz-Buckley, and Papa is gonna be Buck Diaz-Buckley?”
“Yeah, that’s right,” Eddie smiled, he and Buck couldn’t wait for all the pranks they would pull at work with the name changes.
“Can I change mine?” Christopher asked, “To Christopher Diaz-Buckley?”
The pressure shifted off Eddie, for a moment, as he folded an arm around Christopher’s back, “If you want.”
“I do!” Christopher threw up his arms, “I love Buck.”
Eddie smiled, “I do too.”
Christopher leaned his head on his arm, “I love you, Dad.”
“Love you too, buddy,” He bowed down, pressing a kiss in Christopher’s hair.
There was a knock at the door, Eddie’s dad poked his head around, “It’s time, boys.”
Christopher held Eddie’s hand, tight, “We got this, Dad.”
As they piled into the corridor, and Eddie was met by a wall of his family, he let go of a slow breath, he was more than ready.
Meeting Buck at the altar, holding his hands tight, smiling with tears in his eyes, and seeing their son a couple of steps away; he’d never been happier.
#911 fanfiction#911#911onfox#chrisdiazweek2021#christopher diaz#bobby nash#eddie diaz#evan buck buckely#evan buckley#maddie buckley#chimney han#denny wilson#harry grant#athena grant#buddie#buddie wedding because why notttt#liberty writes
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Member: PWARK SEONGHWAbs
Category: playlist feels one shot
Genre: fluff and smut (idk how this is gonna turn out lol i just couldn’t get the visual of boss/ceo? seonghwa out my head and you’re his secretary and i just--)
Word Count: 5.7k
A/N: if you haven’t noticed by now, most of my one shots/work don’t really have cliche plots? there are certain tropes/cliches that i don’t really like or i’m just not tuned into being comfortable writing them like eg. boss and employee is pretty nasty, that’s why the chaebol juyeon series turned out like that (i’m not gonna spoil it but if you know, you know that y/n wasn’t just an employee.) so in here, i guess it’s not going to be an exception? i don’t know when the day will come that i will write one that is EXTREMELY cliche and be able to be satisfied/happy with it.
this is the first smut i’m writing for seonghwa; i’ve only been writing it for san and a tiny bit for mingi and the rest’s literally for juyeon ;_; so i hope i don’t butcher it.
see you on the other side :D
“니 맘 전부 알고 있어”
“I know your heart”
“oh god--” you shove the food on your spoon into your mouth, nearly throwing it on the table just as the music starts ringing in the room, and he was already resting his chopsticks on the bowl. “please don’t--”
“seonghw-- ugh.”
too late.
“forget it, do whatever you want at your own dinner table. i can’t believe you invited me over just so i have to watch you have your own concert,” the food calls you again, and seonghwa acts like he’s in a drama or a music video.
“have you finished compiling the contracts from the previous year and making sure everything tallied?” he raises a candid brow at you, his hands reaching out to you as the lyrics ran its course. a frown draws into your forehead, and you swat his hand away, reaching for a piece of fried egg instead of watching him act his heart out.
“i’m still working on it, but i’ll have it in by the end of tomorrow,” the egg finds its way between your teeth and you push some rice in along with it, fingers finding your phone when it lit up.
“wooyoung’s asking if we’re going to hang out anytime soon.”
you look up through your damp hair and glare at seonghwa, hands still flailing around and his torso following along with the movements.
it really was a wonder you’ve been friends with him since you were teenagers, and somewhere, somehow, some deity really thought making you the secretary of one of your best friends was a good idea.
initially, you were relieved that your boss was someone you knew as well as you did the back of your hand, but within the first six months of being seonghwa’s secretary, you literally couldn’t help yourself from hurling a file at him once in awhile.
it wasn’t difficult to catch you screaming at him in the office because he passed out from overworking himself, telling him to go home. not because he was taking a nap, but because you found him sprawled across his desk after working through the night.
that was the day everybody in office found out you were friends from the same circle.
so whenever anybody had the slightest issue or complaint about their boss, they’d come to you in hopes that you would smack -- or yell -- some sense into him.
seonghwa had his shitty days and it didn’t stop him from being a terrible boss; you could empathise. but otherwise, he’d be strutting around office and annoying the hell out of both you and your colleagues by giving them sweets, to the extent that someone would wonder just how he was the one everybody needed to address as ‘boss’.
“wooyoung? but hongjoong’s overseas and mingi practically vanished off the face of earth. if he wants to have a meal together, he needs to hunt mingi down first,” the fishcake in the soup suddenly contained enough power to make seonghwa stop rolling his chest and send it into his mouth.
“i’ll tell him no then,” the message sends and you put the phone back down onto the table. “anyway, the security told me when i left the office that the camera in your office is down and they’ll have someone sent over to fix it over the weekend, so they just told me to relay the message to you.”
“why wouldn’t they just email me?”
your tongue digs into the gap between your gum and your upper lip sa you reach for the glass of coke. “i’m pretty sure they’ve given up emailing you, especially since you don’t use that email address often.”
“hey, i have one for office operations and one for business, is that so wrong?” his defensive tone causes his voice to crack and go off tune, striking a funny bone in you despite already hearing it a billion times over.
“i didn’t say there’s anything wrong, it’s just annoying when you give someone your email but you don’t even check your inbox,” you finish your last spoonful of rice and chicken, downing the soup to wash down the food. “but anyway, point is, don’t do anything dumb in your office.”
he scoffs, finally returning dedicated focus to his food. the food that he bothered to prepare for you before even telling you he was cooking dinner. it made you obligated to show up, else you’d get an earful from him for being ungrateful.
“name me one dumb thing i could do in my office,” his cat eyes widen and the whites around his pupils glare at you under the lighting.
“how would i know?” sucking the grains of rice from the hidden spots in your mouth, letting the water droplets on the side of the coke glass run over your nails and drip off the base. “like have a heart attack and pass out tomorrow, if you choose to stay over time?”
seonghwa stretches his legs under the table, and his sock-covered feet jab you in your ankles. a sharp ‘tsk’ slides out from gritted teeth, and he laughs at your reaction.
“it’s not peak period for companies to be contacting me now, so that probably won’t happen.”
“well, don’t leave your office door unlocked or something, someone could waltz right in and find your shit and that’ll just might be the end of you.”
“honestly, i thought it would’ve been funnier if you encouraged me to do more dumb things in the office, since there wouldn’t be any footage of it.”
wincing in disgust, your hands wipe the water off the surface of the coke glass and you flick it at him. a loud snicker blocks out the music for a moment when he ducks and uses his arm as a shield.
“god forsake i recorded that and told the office you said that,” the coke glass empties itself down your throat, and you help yourself out of the seat to help him clear the dishes.
“it’s a good thing you’re worth trusting then,” you hear him say loud enough for you to hear while you rest the plates in the sink.
a chair drags across the floor and the soft clinking of the porcelain plates from the dining table mixes with the water gushing out of the tap.
if you had to describe your friendship with seonghwa, it’d be an open book.
one of the best things about being friends with him was that he was always mature enough to look past little arguments or conflicts that shouldn’t have an impact on your friendship.
sometimes he was whiny and pouty and it nauseated you, but he was always one to have your back whenever you needed it. his shoulder was always there for you to cry on, not the mention the hugs he gave.
so why ‘open book’?
“i’m only worth trusting because you kept my secret and prevented anybody else from blowing shit out of proportion.”
a gentle chuckle rings by your ear, and seonghwa refuses to fill the sink with more dishes while you were still standing there. there wasn’t a time when he’s hosted a dinner and let his guests do the dishes for him.
the water runs the dishwasher soap off your skin and you step away for him to take over.
“it didn’t blow out of proportion only because i didn’t tell anybody else,” he turns and flashes his smile at you, and it reminds you of the first time you fell for it.
you guessed it.
park seonghwa was the love of your life at some point of time, and he knew.
in fact, nobody else knew besides the two of you.
you had made it so painfully obvious that if anybody was observant enough, they’d be able to pick it up. luckily for you, hongjoong was too busy making sure mingi wasn’t sticking a pen down his throat just to prove a point, and seonghwa was the only one who noticed you staring at him.
so ‘open book’ in some sense... for the both of you. not so much anybody else outside your exclusive friendship.
the fear in your chest and entire body was so overstimulating in that moment he caught you staring at him, with eyes you assumed he would’ve found creepy, that you could’ve cried in that instant.
it wasn’t likely that he’d stop being friends with you just because you had feelings for him, but it was likely that he’d start distancing himself from you just so he wouldn’t hurt you.
~~~~~~~~~ FLASHBACK ~~~~~~~~~~~
“don’t fuckin’ let him swallow the pen!” he yells at hongjoong, who was struggling to use his relatively shorter limbs to hold mingi’s long limbs down. your stressed vision was darting back and forth between the little wrestling match and confusion and fear start to swallow you like waves on a stormy day when seonghwa gets out of his seat and walks towards you.
“come on,” he shows you a hand. everybody was seated in his living room, pizza boxes empty and coke bottles neatly thrown into a trashbag in the corner with the flashes of light from the television brightening the room every few seconds. “let’s go out and grab some fresh air while these two idiots settle themselves.”
seonghwa literally pulls you to your feet, and he must’ve guessed how much shit you thought you were in, for you to require someone else to tear you away from the ground.
the sliding doors rustle open, and the cool autumn air outside greets you as if to mock you. the street lamps outside his house prevent you from seeing any stars, but you remember why you were out here in the first place.
your fingers find each other, your nails automatically starting to pick and peel at the skin on the other hand as seonghwa pulls the doors shut, muffling the whining and the screeching mingi was polluting his surroundings with.
your forearms were rested on the surface of the wooden barriers, and your eyes looked dead straight in attempt to avoid his. the wooden barrier creaks, and you catch a glimpse of his hands gripping the rough surface, his torso leaning over it at an angle so he could meet your eyes without needing to shift you.
the thumping and racing in your chest was so rapid and aggressive, you wish you were dead instead. your lips parted, already prepared to say sorry and get the hell out of his life before he breaks your heart first.
“seonghwa, i--”
“no, it’s okay,” his voice was gentle in the almost-quiet atmosphere. “i was already suspecting it, and you only confirmed it.”
the blood rushes from your feet into your face, and your knuckles whiten from the amount of effort you channeled into holding the wooden barriers to support yourself. the last thing you wanted to do was to pass out infront of him.
“i know you don’t feel the same, but i don’t want this to ruin our friendship,” mustering enough courage, you turn to him and lock pleading eyes with his.
“well, neither do i. i wish i could ignore it, and if you were just any other girl, i wouldn’t have bothered having this conversation with you,” he turns and leans his lower back against the wooden boards. “but it’s you and you’re one of the few things i can’t risk losing.”
silence.
“this friendship is more important than whether or not you reciprocate. so even if you did, i’d be terrified to even start one with you... in fear that we’d break up and everything prior wouldn’t mean anything,” the words roll of your tongue with such fluidity, it surprised you even more than it did for seonghwa.
“if that’s the case, then i’m relieved,” he pushes himself off the wooden planks and digs his fingers into the top of your head, ruffling your hair. “i don’t want our friendship to finish so pathetically either, so i take it that you want this conversation to be just between us?”
the nerves in your body tell you to nod, and you carry it out before the thoughts even get processed.
a weak smile curls his lips upwards, and he removes his hand from your head. “okay. you have my word.”
~~~~~~~~ NOW ~~~~~~~~~
so just like that.
you and seonghwa made a silent deal never to tell anybody, and you made an effort to shove your feelings for him so far down your heart, you think you might’ve shat it out into a random toilet bowl in the last six years or so.
“anyway,” you recall how you even got to this part of the conversation. “so don’t do anything remotely dumb in the office. if anybody encourages you to do it, i’ll murder them myself.”
his teeth glimmer in the light and the water starts running its way through the bubbles and foam on his hand and the plates in the sink.
you stay long enough to remind seonghwa not to do anything stupid in his office the next day and to lock the door whenever he wasn’t in, at least five times over. seonghwa forces you to eat some strange concoction of ginseng and peach juice before you had to run out the door and straight home.
the next day at work passed strangely quicker, and much quieter than you thought.
seonghwa didn’t spend much time outside you office, and your colleagues handling external liaisons were busy too. it wasn’t difficult to figure out that despite seonghwa saying that companies wouldn’t be approaching him for new partnerships, one big one must’ve come by to keep him in his little box in the corner of the floor.
but more often than not, being seonghwa’s secretary made you feel obligated to stay until he actually chased you home. and even if he did, you’d try to peel him away from his workspace too, well aware that he’d probably spend the night in his office if you didn’t.
today wasn’t an exception.
the last external liaison officer left the office and waved goodbye to you, leaving you at your desk in the cubicle nearest to seonghwa’s office.
you gather the contract summaries and place them into a clear file, throwing your phone into your suitcase and pulling your blazer over your shoulders. after you hand him the contract administration file, you’re going to make sure he went home today, even if it meant shoving him off his seat.
you stretch out your arms to straighten the sleeves of the blazer, one hand clutching onto your suitcase and the other holding the file. turning off the light at your desk left seonghwa’s office light as the last remaining source of illumination of the area.
“seonghwa,” you call out, trapping the file between your elbow and your rib as you knocked on the door.
“door’s open,” his voice sounded so tired and strained, you wish you could scold him for being so hardworking, but that was just the way he is.
“i thought i told you to lock the door,” seonghwa’s eyes were plastered to the computer screen, sheets of paper strewn about on the desk. usually you’d be surprised, given how neat and organised seonghwa had to be. but since this must’ve been one hell of a contract, you could understand that he lost some of his bearings.
“i’m in the office, there’s no reason for me to lock it,” his eyes tear away from the screen and look down at the papers.
the office smelled like febreeze, which you already were used to. seonghwa sighs a loud sigh and he gets out of his seat, stretching his limbs while you walk around to his desk, placing the file down and picking up some of the sheets he was just looking at.
you drop your suitcase to your feet and your eyes naturally begin to skim through the brand new contract he spent the entire day obsessing over. seonghwa shifts and you hear his shoes pace up and down the space behind you, probably trying to get the blood circulation going from the hours of sitting down.
the lamp sitting on his desk illuminates the papers in your hands into a bright white, and the printed black words become so much shinier under it.
“oh? samsung?” your eyes widen slightly at the name printed on the sheet. “no wonder you’ve been in here the whole day.”
he hums, and you start to feel his torso looming over you from behind.
“what else do you have to do though?” you flip through the sheets, and he pushes your hair aside, his fingers lightly brushing against the skin under your ear.
“not funny, seonghwa,” the frown deepens into your forehead when you notice all the sheets had already been filled up. “are you clearing emails? if you’ve filled up the contract sheets then there’s no reason for you to be her--”
the pressure on your lower back combined with the soft breathing on your neck cuts off the oxygen from your nose to your lungs. the air hitting your skin causes goosebumps to erupt all over your skin, and you start to cringe from the ticklish sensation. you flinch and your shoulder shrugs up to your ear as you turn around, taken aback to realise he was standing right behind you, barely giving you any space to turn.
“uh...” the air was eerily still, and there was a strange look in his eyes that you don’t find familiar. your rear rests against the edge of the desk, and you pass the sheets to your left hand, right hand reaching up to wave it infront of seonghwa’s face. “are you okay?”
“i’m more than fine,” gently wrapping his fingers around your palm, you raise a brow in confusion.
you sigh and return the sheets back to the middle of the desk, hand still in his. “you look like you’re going to pass out, is there anything wrong?”
naturally, your other hand finds his, and you pat the back of his hands like you were petting a dog.
“i need to ask something, and you gotta promise to answer me honestly,” there was a hint of fear and anxiety in his voice, and you didn’t like it.
nonetheless, he was one of your best friends and he wouldn’t ever hurt you, no matter what he said.
he was probably going to ask something you would find offensive.
“alright,” you release his hands and cross your arms over your chest. “hit me.”
seonghwa shoves both his hands into his pocket and straightens his back, the change in posture making him look taller than what you were used to seeing.
“do you still feel the same?”
the muscles in your neck snap your head backwards, and both eye brows lift themselves further away from your eyes. a small snort escapes your nose, and you start to nibble on your thumb.
“‘still feel the same’? about what? about what happened seven years ago in your living room?”
the smile doesn’t disappear from your lips, and it only gets wider when seonghwa nods.
“park seonghwa,” you chortle, lifting your hand up to his forehead and pressing so hard into his skull that his head tilts backwards. “are you sure you’re okay? because i’m pretty sure that’s your juiced-out brain talking.”
one foot was already turned to walk out from between him and the desk, but he slams his left hand onto the surface of the expensive wood, and the loud slap of skin against wood startles you.
your head whips to the left to look at him, and it dawns on you that he wasn’t messing with you. not a single feature on his face twitched, and you could see his soul crawling out of his eyes and threatening to squeeze into yours.
“an honest answer.”
the most vital organ in your body starts to race, and the sensation yanks you back seven years to when seonghwa figured it out for himself.
you haven’t felt the same kind of panic and worry since then.
“i’d like to believe i’ve gotten over you, why?” the neurons in your brain struggled a little to piece that sentence together.
“so it’s not a definite ‘no’?”
straightening yourself, you pat down your blazer and jab a finger into his shoulder. “did you not hear a word i just said?”
“y/n,” this time he grabs your wrist, and you could feel the groves and bones of his fingers. “it was a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question.”
a pause, and you start hearing your heart in your ears.
“do you still feel the same?”
everything inside you screams ‘no’, but you were well aware that if you had to even convince yourself that that was the case, then it was obvious the answer is ‘yes’. you start screeching at yourself in your own head, knowing that if you kept quiet any longer, seonghwa’s sharp eyes and extreme situational awareness was going to help him crack the code.
“i--”
“so it’s a ‘yes’.”
fuck me.
“seonghwa, let me explain, okay? it’s not that i didn’t try, i’m just letting those... stupid feelings wear away on its own,” you writhe yourself out his hold and he releases you, but you couldn’t prepare yourself for what he said or did next.
“there’s nothing to explain, just let your heart tell you what’s good for you.”
there wasn’t a single cell inside you that could tell you why you were so scared, so when seonghwa cups your cheeks with his hands and presses his lips against yours, the realisation pulls your eyes wide open.
red and white sirens go off violently in your head like declarations of war, and your palms press flat against his chest to push him back.
“what are you-- seonghwa, if you think this is funny, then you need to know that it’s not. at all.”
“no, please, i didn’t mean to make you think i’m messing with you,” his eyes soften, and you were relieved to realise that the seonghwa standing in front of you right now was the one you recognised.
“really? because if we weren’t friends for like ten years, i’d think you’re just another playboy.”
seonghwa offers a weak chuckle, and he rubs the back of his neck in embarrassment. you take a few deep breaths to steady your heart, the mind-boggling situation not exactly resting in a comfortable spot in your head.
“is that how you really see me? a playboy?” he raises a brow with mischief, and the slowly diminishing gap between the two of you alarms your senses all over again.
“i’m well aware of how the girls in school used to look at you,” his breath starts to hit your upper lip again, and the hairs on the back of your neck stand.
“okay, but that was seven years ago,” you watch with the slightest pinch of horror when his hands run up your arms and rest on your shoulders. “but now we’re both adults and i’m sure you’re mature enough to understand your own feelings, regardless of what i was treated as in school.”
“could you hurry up and get to the point?” you frown when he leans in again, your head slowly inching backwards. “all this beating around the bush is going to piss me off and i’m going to leave you here alone and go home.”
the sound of his laughter landed in your ears like music, and you let it run through you that it was one of the many things that led you to fall for him.
“okay, well...” he licks his lips ever so subtly, and he tilts his head so you didn’t need to. “if you still have feelings for me then i want you to know that i have feelings for you too.”
the confession rests on your skin like a layer of silk, and your eyes somehow become comfortable closing this time round.
he tasted exactly the way you’d expect him to: strawberries.
your hands were still awkwardly gripping the edges of the table, so when he finds them and pulls them around his own neck, that was when you lost all sense of reality.
you couldn’t decide between kissing him because you still had feelings for him or because you’ve spent so much time being comfortable around him, some part of you felt so at home.
the line was so thin that you physically felt it disappear.
the thought of it was kind of messed up, but it was seonghwa, the one who stayed your friend despite knowing you had feelings for him, the one who stayed and protected you by not telling anybody else.
not wooyoung, not hongjoong, not mingi.
the feeling of your entire existence, and the last seven years, melt into that kiss was so heartfelt, and it may have been your feelings for seonghwa talking, but his lips against yours felt like heaven-born puzzle pieces meant for each other.
seonghwa picks you up and places you on the desk, the kisses soft and gentle, and his fingers on your cheek made you feel like heaven all on its own.
if hongjoong were here, you just know he was going to yell at the two of you for choosing intimacy over your friendship, but for two people who had mutual feelings for each other, there wasn’t much anybody could do about it.
seonghwa breaks the kiss and he gives you a gorgeous smile, the sight shoving a hundred butterflies into your stomach while the strawberry taste lingers on your lips.
“tell me if you’re uncomfortable--”
“we’re in the office--”
“camera’s not working.”
a small scoff runs off your tongue, and he dips his nose into your neck. kisses the weight of feathers land on your skin, and your heart starts running through your chest like it was in a competition. his hands push your legs open, the sudden jerk shooting little bolts of shock up your spine.
whines start to drip over your lips upon the kisses on your neck, and seonghwa drags his palms up your thighs, the pressure slightly but never overwhelming.
he wraps his arms around your waist when he returns his attention to your lips, pulling you so close to him that your chest was pressed against his, and your nose starts to pick up on his scent.
your weight begins to shift backwards as his hands messily push all the things on his table to the side, laying you on your back but never once breaking the kiss.
“this is so not okay,” you huff embarrassedly, arm finding your forehead when he pulls away. you heard him gulp, and it reminds you that he must be as anxious as you were, if not even more.
“are you really okay with letting me do this?” he presses a kiss into your cheek, fingers caressing your knees that he held on either sides of his hips. “you can say no, and we’ll be fine. we let it go once, we can let it go again.”
the look in his eyes were so dangerously comforting, you felt your mind glitch a little trying to process them. seonghwa was so genuine and sincere about your feelings that it made you nauseous. the pricetag the both of you were putting on tonight was your friendship.
one wrong move and it could all go down the drain.
“i’m okay as long as i know that you’ll still be here, even if anything goes wrong.”
seonghwa looks at you with slightly sorrowful eyes, before he kisses you again, and the amount of comfort and promise that you absorbed from it was enough to make you tear up.
“i’ll never leave you, even if we aren’t a couple and if we’re just friends... even if we stop talking fifty years down the road, i’ll still want you to be by my side in the afterlife.”
your nose sours at his little speech, and your heart shatters without warning. pulling him back to your lips, you kiss him like life was going to tear him away from you.
seonghwa drinks your love and need for affection with ease, fingers trailing down your stomach and under your skirt to play with the rims of your underwear.
fingers slide under the material and he smiles into the kiss when he realises your body needed him more than you’d like to admit. you would’ve slapped him across the face if he pulled away just to tease you, but he doesn’t.
he swallows a loud groan from you when he slips a finger in, and your grip around his shoulders tighten upon the blissful sensation.
your fingers start to fumble with the dress shirt he was wearing under his blazer, and bit by bit, the whiteness of his skin start to remind you of milk.
seonghwa removes his finger and sucks it like a lollipop, his eyes flying up to the dress shirt around your chest and he does the same for you.
you couldn’t contain the mewls that slipped through your teeth when he undoes enough buttons to expose your cleavage, and the kisses on the curves of your breast felt like you were already one foot into the afterlife.
the last button on his dress shirt comes undone, and you marvel at his torso. for a split second, you felt so proud you fell for him not because of his face or body, but because of his personality. yet, now with the knowledge that he looked like that under the layers of clothes, it was too difficult a task to hide the lust that overcame you almost instantaneously.
“hold your horses, kitten,” he pulls away from your chest, at the same time removing your underwear from under your skirt. your eyes involuntarily lock with his, and again, you couldn’t recognise them.
“who are you and what have you done to park seonghwa?” you mock him in attempt to calm your own bundle of nerves. a smirk pulls his lips up in the corner, and he yanks you to the edge of the table where his groin was dangerously near your exposed core.
“i’m yours and he’ll come back once i’m done with you.”
you throw your head back into the table when he kneels down, and his tongue finds your sensitive nub. your fingers run through your own hair when he starts flicking against you, occasionally lapping your dripping neediness up. he doesn’t push into you, which was both frustrating and pleasuring at the same time.
you start to lose your grip on reality, and just as you were about to protest against him being such a tease, he removes his face from your south and begins undoing his belt.
your lids were droopy with lust, and watching him undo the button and zipper of his pants made it so much more worth it.
“i wish i knew this day was coming,” you whisper to him as he leans over you again, one arm holding his torso above you and the other, you assume, pulling his underwear low enough to release himself from the material.
“so you can tell the girls that you’re having sex with me in the office?”
the line sounded so lewd, blood began rushing both down to your south and up to your cheeks.
“what, you’re shy now?” the brow he raises was so smug, you would’ve bitten down on his bottom lip if you didn’t suddenly gasp when he plunged into you without warning.
your chin tilts so sharply towards the ceiling, he had to pull it back down for him to shove his tongue into your mouth, and a pinch of pain seeps through your entrance into your thighs.
the harsh, rougher kisses were pulling inappropriate noises out from your throat, and he starts thrusting into you when he assumes you’ve gotten used to him. his right hand was supporting his weight by the side of your head, and his left palm was gripping onto your thigh with such immense strength, you were sure he was going to leave marks by the time you were done.
seonghwa finally pulls away, beads of sweat forming on his forehead and his pants becoming more apparent. your arms grip onto the edge of the desk above your head, and tears start to form in your eyes when the pain completely dissolves into pleasure and bliss.
“my pretty, pretty, secretary,” he huffs into your ear and licks the edge of your skin, the contact sending you over an edge and the friction in your abdomen drilling dirty thoughts into your head.
“seonghwa--” the thrusts get deliberately harder and rougher, the sudden bucking of his hips enough to jerk the entire table. “oh-- shit--”
the tip of him starts to ram into a magical spot inside you, and your eyes roll into the back of your head when he doesn’t stop.
“be a good girl and come for me.”
every word literally gets hammered into you, and it sends you into an abyss of bright light while your legs shiver in ecstasy, and seonghwa pulls out shortly after, his speed allowing him to grab some napkin from the corner of his table so that he wouldn’t release anywhere on his desk.
you struggle to catch your breath, and seonghwa reaches over to clean you off the table.
“oh, no,” you cover your mouth and give a painful chuckle.
“what is it?” his voice was soft and smooth again, and the gears in your head stop to process that this was the same person who just called you a good girl a few moments ago.
he pulls your hand away and gives you a light kiss on your lips, eyes scanning your face with worry and concern.
“i told you not to do anything dumb, but i ended up doing it with you.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: WHOO ok that was kinda long for a one shot. anyway, it’s super mellow compared to what i did for pilot juyeon so i hope you (smut)readers don’t mind heh. i’m still working on HOSTIS chapter 2, so look out for it! it should be up any time in the next few days.
thank you for reading, and stay safe!!
- love, dana
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Spiral of Feelings - 1/5
Pairing: Bucky x Reader
AU: Fake Dating AU
Description: Natasha makes you feel bad about being single and how your apartment looks. Sam and Steve annoy Bucky about dating. Seems only fair that you both fake it to show them that it doesn’t make a difference. But what if it does?
Warnings: Judgemental friends, shaming for being single. Absolutely not proofread and written half a year ago, lol.
Masterlist // Spiral of Feelings Masterlist
“God, you really need to get your life together, honey!” Natasha said with a judging face at you and then your giant pile of laundry and trash.
“Nat! I live how I want and right now I have enough to do at the compound!” You said with your hands on your hips.
“If you wouldn’t procrastinate either so much you might even have free time.” She smirked.
“Why do you have to be so nosy about it?”
“Don’t know, but I feel like you need a relationship to get the personal part of your life back on track again. Your own motivation doesn’t seem to be enough.” She chuckled and you gaped at her offended. She knew why you weren’t dating. You wanted to concentrate on your career and your evening Netflix ritual. That just came with less housework getting done.
“Buck! You need to get outside of this apartment more and actually live like a normal human being would!” Steve looked at him with a frown.
“Steve, I genuinely couldn’t care less about 90% of people out there compared to the ones in my books and the ones I met online. Let me be,” he grumbled back.
“C’mon, you need to at least TRY to get a girl again, doesn’t need to be a relationship.” Sam raised a brow.
“And I’d like to not listen to your advice for the rest of my life but here we are.”
“Bucky? At least try to...I don’t know, find a girl online and meet up with her?” He suggested.
“Do you leave me alone if I have a goddamn date?” Bucky dipped his head to the side.
“Yeah.” Both of them rolled their eyes.
“Okay, I’ll do that so you idiots stop being so nosy.” He nodded and the two men were at least a little bit relaxed about their friend after that. If he was going to do it this time? They were kinda sure he wouldn’t.
“Stop constantly telling me I need a date like we don’t live in a world where girls can be happy and single,” you grumbled and peaked Bucky’s attention.
“I’m just saying, your life might be more balanced that way.” Nat shrugged. She was on this weird trip for a while now after reading some books on relationships and dating more herself.
“You constantly reminding me of being single makes me feel more like I’m lesser than anyone just cause I don’t juggle my household stuff perfectly. It’s fucking disrespectful,” you hissed and Bucky stepped in.
“What’s going on here?” He looked between the both of you a few times.
“Nothing,” Nat mumbled and went to the common room while you needed to calm down from being so provocated by her.
“Hey, you okay?” Bucky looked down at you.
“Yeah, just sick of friends constantly telling me I need a relationship for everything to be better. That’s bullshit,” you mumbled.
“I feel you. Steve and Sam are the most annoying idiots ever about it.” He rolled his eyes.
“Oh?” You looked up.
“What?” He smirked.
You dragged him into your apartment in the compound.
“Ignore the mess and listen to my idea,” You looked at him in the middle of your apartment. He couldn’t not look, so he eyed your pile of laundry and grinned internally.
“We could fake date and silence them all. Show them it doesn’t make a damn difference. Dumb idea, but might work. Unless that stuff makes you uncomfortable. Just a random thought.”
He thought about it for a moment, internally playing all the scenarios and if Steve would believe him, “That could actually work. Maybe they finally shut up for once.”
“You gonna take me out on a ‘date’?” You asked making air quotes.
“Is that code for going to Waffle House without the others?” He grinned and you nodded.
“You can bet it is.”
*******
“You joining movie night later?” Wanda asked while emptying the dishwasher.
“Nah, I’m out with Bucky,” you said as nonchalantly as possible.
“Oh? Like a date or…?” She smiled softly.
“I think, yeah,” you said looking down to the counter.
“Cute, where are you going?”
“I have no idea. He just said it’s going to be sweet food.” you shrugged like you didn’t know a thing.
“I’m so happy for you.” She grinned before hugging you.
“Thanks, Wan.”
“Are you ready, darling?” He asked knocking at your door. Having acting skills for missions was finally helping in actual life.
“One second!” You called out while grabbing your jacket and gum.
You opened the door and didn’t expect him to stand so close in front of it and almost ran into him.
“You ready for unhealthy amounts of food?” He grinned down and winked before grabbing your hand while you walked past the common area.
“Have fun!” Wanda yelled out.
“God, finally nobody bothering me anymore.” You breathed out and heard a chuckle.
“I’m not bothering you?”
“Not when there is food and jokes involved.” You grinned up at him, not letting go of his hand. You really enjoyed the whole hand-holding part and not freezing to death in the fall temperatures that were slowly declining.
“Already having a plan what you want?”
“Caramel, cinnamon & marshmallows.” You smiled content.
“Sounds like a plan, darling.” He let go of your hand and put an arm around you while walking into the place.
“And while we’re here we can plot all of this out, right? Needs to work so they get off my ass.” You chuckled before both of you ordered your food.
“Tons of cute pictures on our dates and around our apartments.” He deadpanned and referred to the new standards couples had nowadays.
“And little videos,” you giggled while filming your food and then up at him and capturing him smiling and shaking his head with a huff.
“Nicknames?” You asked after putting your phone to the side.
“Hm, maybe...Darling? Sugar? Doll? Princess?” He started counting.
You shivered, “Please don’t call me doll, I connect too many bad things to that from other languages.”
He nodded, understanding that it sounded like a sexist insult in a lot of other languages.
“And for you? Honey? Cinnamon? Muffin? Bucky Bear?” You grinned and got another one of his headshake smiles.
“Why are all of them food except for one?” He squinted with a shimmer in his eyes.
“Cause you’re a snack?” You said snorting at your own joke.
“Guess I’ll have to accept that.” He grinned with a shrug.
“Yeah, those were the only non-sexual ones that I could come up with, so you’ll have to live with them.”
“So…” He got your attention again, “How are we going to do this?”
“I don’t know. Just be close together when we are around them, a few kisses and pet names here and there, at some point starting to sleep in each other’s apartment. Stuff like that. It’s just to prove them wrong. Maybe a month or two?” you suggested to him and it hit him that he would have to kiss you and maybe that hit him a little different to how he expected it.
“Yeah, okay, sounds reasonable,” he mumbled before digging back into his food, just to be attacked with your phone taking pictures.
“At least come over here and take actual selfies with me, you little shit.” He grinned and you did as he suggested.
Smiling, grimaces, cuddly, kiss on the cheek.
“Hmm, gonna edit these and send them to you so you can make them your phone background.” You hummed with a smile down at them, not really realizing that he was still smiling at you.
#mine#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#james buchanan barnes#bucky barnes x y/n#james barnes#bucky x you#bucky x reader#bucky x y/n#the winter soldier#text#captain america#mcu#marvel#marvel cinematic universe#bucky fanfic#fake dating AU#modern!bucky#agent!reader#agent x bucky#bucky x agent
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You and Me...
Chapter 13
***SERIES WARNINGS**** Rape, non-con, male!rape, injury, violence, description of injury caused by rape, nightmares, self-harm, panic attacks, implied female non-con, language, ass hole Jensen, hurt!Jensen, dark fic, smut. If there is anything else I will add it as I go.
***Chapter Warnings*** Naked Jensen, yes that’s a warning lol, mild panic attack, probably language, cause that’s always a warning with me, hint of reader body insecurities. I think that’s about it with this one.
Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader
Word Count: 1815
A/N: Anyway, all mistakes are mine, please don’t copy my work, Feedback is golden. If you want to be added to the series tag list, or my tag list just let me know! I hope you enjoy this one. This is something I actually did and witness, and I realize this one might be hard to read because it is a little heavy.
Summary: It’s funny how one choice you made can change your whole life. One mistake can alter your course, and set you on a path that forever will haunt you. Two people find themselves getting through one of the hardest trials of Jensen’s life, on just one small promise. You and Me. We’ll get through it together…
Want more? Check out my Masterlist!!
***MASTERLIST***
***YOU AND ME MASTERLIST***
Pulling the boxing tape over the last box you sit down on the bed and look around the now empty room.
The only thing left was the furniture. It’s not like you had a whole lot anyway. Some clothes, your guitar, some other odds, and in things. Jensen had told you there was no real point in taking the furniture.
His house was fully furnished and then some.
"Baby? You ready?" Jensen yelled from the front door.
He had said just to stack the boxes up, and you both would come to get them in the morning, so you stood up and put the last box in the pile by the door before throwing your overnight bag over your shoulder.
"Yeah... I think that's everything," you yell back at him, taking one final look at your phone before tucking it back into your pocket.
It was late, almost 11:00 pm. The two of you had spent all day packing and boxing up your things so that you'd be able to move in with him by tonight, and you could tell that he was more than excited about it.
In fact, this was the most excited you had seen him… Well ever...
The words that the therapist had said still echoing in your ears. “He's not glass, he's not gonna break if you touch him.”
That was something throughout the day you had to keep reminding yourself, because tonight, when you were done with the day, and it was time for bed, you had to do the other part of your exercise.
You had both been so busy all day that you hadn’t really touched each other at all since you got back to the apartment and started packing. Tonight though, you knew what was coming, and you were probably more afraid than he was about it.
You made your way to the front door, turning off lights as you went, checking everything one last time. Jensen was already there waiting on you. He seemed happy about the thought of going home tonight, sleeping in his own bed, and when you got to him by the door he even made a half-hearted attempt at smiling at you.
"It's late, let's just call in some take out and grab it on the way home," he said as you turned off the last light, locking the door, and following him into the hallway.
"Sounds good to me," you tell him, not realizing how hungry you actually were until he mentioned food. As you made your way to the elevator and pushed the button you felt Jensen lace his fingers with yours, bring your hand up to his lips, and kiss the back of it lightly.
This was it. It was official. You were his girlfriend, and you were moving in with him. You felt like your head was spinning.
You had been with him for weeks now, but not WITH him, and man it all just didn’t feel real yet, it felt like you were walking through a dream, and at any moment you were going to wake up.
Two hours later, the dishwasher was loaded with supper's dishes, whatever wasn’t disposable anyway.
Jensen had given you the tour of the house.
Which was honestly mind-blowing, and you had unpacked what clothes you had brought with you. Jensen had decided to just hire some movers to go get the rest of the things from your apartment, which he said would save the two of you a trip, and work on your last day off before having to start back recording Monday.
"I think I'm gonna go grab a shower and I'm calling it a night," you tell a wet haired Jensen as he comes out of the master bathroom, and sees you sitting on the small lounge chair in the room.
"Okay, sounds good to me. I'm exhausted," he said, flopping down on the bed on his stomach, nothing but a towel wrapped loosely around his waist.
Maybe tonight wasn't the best night to start the little experiment that the therapist had suggested. You opened your mouth to say something about it to Jensen, but when you looked at him he'd dropped the towel that was around his waist to the ground, and was crawling under the covers.
“Well, that answers that,” you think to yourself as you walk toward the shower. Maybe he normally slept naked though when he was home.
You knew he was ready to get better, to get his life back. You understood that, and honestly, you would probably have been the same exact way, but you didn’t want him to push himself too fast. The Therapist said work up to getting nake, not flop in the bed in your birthday suit on your first try.
But it was his body, and he knew what he could handle. You reminded yourself that he wasn’t glass. It’s okay...He’s not going to break.
So you were going to do whatever you had to do to help him get better. Even if it means stepping a little out of your comfort zone to help. Even though you had seen Jensen naked before, on more than one occasion as he was recovering from his physical injuries, he had never seen you naked, and your insecurities spiked through the roof.
“Calm down, Y/N. He’s not exactly focused on that right now,” you whispered yelled at yourself.
It wasn't that you didn't want a physical relationship with Jensen, because God knows you did. It was the fact that you didn't want him to be uncomfortable, or stressed, because of what had been done to him.
After your shower you dried yourself off and quickly blow-dried your hair. Once you were done you stood there looking at yourself in the mirror for probably the first time today. Things had been so crazy since all this had happened. You felt a little bit like you were working on autopilot. Like you were functioning only because you knew it’s what you had to do. Things were starting to hit you now though, and the butterfly swarm in your stomach seemed to get angrier.
“You can do this,” you whispered to yourself.
Jensen was in there looking more like a damn Greek god than anyone had a right to. You didn't understand why he said he had feelings for you when in your opinion he could do so much better. The only thing you were almost sure of though was that you loved that man laying in there, problems and all.
Taking a deep breath you walk out of the bathroom to an already dark bedroom. For just a moment you thought Jensen was already asleep until you saw him lift the cover for you to crawl in next to him. Taking a deep, calming breath you drop your own towel and climb into the bed next to him. Taking your time, you slowly slide over to where Jensen was laying on his side facing you, his arm stretched out for you to crawl into, putting your head against his bare chest.
He wrapped you in his arms around you and tangled your legs together. Skin to skin, nothing in between the two of you. You were surrounded by his scent. The heat coming from his body. You could feel his every breath. Hear his heartbeat as it pounded against his chest in a steady rhythm.
"You okay," you asked him, almost afraid of the answer. He nuzzled his head into your hair, taking a deep breath.
"More than okay," he said. "I've dreamt of laying with you like this since the moment I met you," he said, playing ideally with your hair, purposely taking control and you laid there as still as you could, letting him do whatever it is he felt like he needed to do.
You nuzzle closer into the bend of his neck, breathing in his scent deeply. A light shudder moved over him as he felt your breath brush against his skin. So far he seemed to be okay. So you thought you’d try a little further.
Taking what little bit of nerve you had left, repeating mentally that he's not glass, he's not that fragile, you slowly move your fingers up and down his back from his shoulders to his waist. You feel him shudder again, and hum absently above you, his arms pulling you impossibly closer to him.
It was almost easy laying like this with him to forget that anything had ever happened to him. He was so strong. So perfect. You had never felt safer wrapped up in his arms. Then there was another side of you that hoped those people that did this to him would get the same treatment or worse in prison.
That was a thought you had fought against all day…
Jensen shifted a little until he put his fingers under your chin, and made you look at him, his candy apple green eyes bore into yours, slowly brushed his lips over yours; kissing you softly, but passionately sending sparks through your body. After a few minutes, you feel his tongue come out and slide across your bottom lips, begging for entrance which you gladly gave him.
You never thought you would be able to have this. You never knew that you'd be able to be this close to him. His tongue continued to explore your mouth. Sending shock waves of sparks through you. He seemed to like the amount of control that you were letting him have. Slowly gaining a little confidence he deepening the kiss.
Without thinking you sucked lightly at his tongue, pulling an involuntary moan from him that surprised you both. As soon as he made the sound he immediately stopped kissing you. A faraway look on his face. Taken over by some flashback you couldn't see.
Panicking a little you start to rub the side of his face.
"Jensen? Jensen, come back to me baby. You're safe. I'm right here."
Blinking hard he refocused on you, nuzzling back into your hair. Both of you were pretty sure that was enough experiment for tonight. His breaths coming in quick, short bursts still.
You start running your fingers over his back again, praying he would settle down, and not go deeper into whatever it was he was seeing.
After a few minutes, you feel his breathing even out, and you knew he was asleep. Yourself not far behind him. You'd dreamed about sleeping wrapped in his arms since you'd meet him. Now here it was happening. Nuzzling closer to his neck you feel him hum a little in his sleep. His grip tightening around your waist. You doze off into a peaceful uninterrupted sleep for the first time since you stayed with him in the hospital.
No dreams tonight.
Just the warmth of your bodies and your heart beats pulsing together. Lulling you both better than any drug or drink ever could.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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#jensen ackles#jensen ackles x reader#jensen ackles x you#jensen ackles fanficiton#jensen ackles fanfic#jensen ackles smut#jensen ackles dark fic#dark!fic#fanfiction#spn#spn fanfiction#spn fanfic#jensen x reader#jensen x you#x reader inserts#jawritter#dean winchester
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Anything But Mine - Seavey Shark Week
A/N An episode of Modern Family inspired this one… Also this is terribly unedited so I am very sorry lol I just wanted this idea down so it might be all over the place 😶
W/C: 1.8k
It has been mentioned plenty of times that Daniel loved nothing more than his wife and three daughters and he wouldn’t change anything about his family for a million dollars. Well, that can only be said so much once all the girls are teenagers and things start to change. Things starting to change as in suddenly all three daughters and his wife had synced female cycles, meaning one week a month was almost hell on earth for Daniel. But…he wouldn’t change anything for a million dollars. But it got close sometimes.
His first warning sign was the notification on his phone from Florence’s app that her cycle was starting – they had it synced to his phone to for birth control and ‘safety’ reasons but that’s irrelevant here. This little notification meant he had time to emotionally prepare himself for the week. Daniel wasn’t the father or husband who would shy away from problems or lock himself in his room until it was over and he knew very well that these weeks in particular demanded imperative attention and care.
His second warning sign was Penelope’s sudden drop in appetite. Over breakfast she would eat only half her usual serving and then throw the rest out, dragging herself tiredly around the apartment to get ready for school as if she was physically weighed down by a ball and chain. Then would come Clementine’s temper, yelling at anything that was in her way; the shirt she wanted not being clean, not enough cereal for the amount that she wanted left in the box, or even just Daniel putting his dishes in the dishwasher earned him a loud and exasperated “Dad!” from the eldest. Lucy was only almost thirteen so thankfully she hadn’t grown into the worst of it yet, but it was a thin line they walked on.
Daniel watched his girls rush around to get ready for school as he packed his lunch for work slowly, eyes following each girl carefully. Florence joined him in the kitchen, pulling him in for a kiss, “Good morning, baby.”
“Morning, my love.” Daniel smiled softly at her as she started to get her own breakfast ready.
By the time the girls were ready to leave for school, they were behind schedule and were all rushing to catch the subway together in a panic, shouting their goodbyes to their parents as they left. Daniel got to work on time, thankfully, even after Florence struggled to let him leave for a bit, and he got himself settled for the day in his office to review what needed to be done. Work was always a good little break on weeks like that. It was barely lunchtime when the intercom buzzed, and his secretary was saying the elementary school was on the line.
Daniel thanked her quickly and picked up the line with a rushed, “Hello?”
“Daddy.” Lucy sniffled from the other end. “Thank God you answered.”
“Of course, sweetheart. What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“No. I need to be picked up. I tried calling Mom but she didn’t answer…I think she’s out today but…I need to come home.”
“Okay. I can come get you. What’s going on? Are you sick?” Daniel started to pack up his things with the phone balanced between his ear and his shoulder.
Lucy whimpered through the phone and let out a small sob before whispering, “I bled through my jeans.”
Daniel’s eyes went wide, “Oh. Okay. I’m on my way. Hang tight.”
“Please hurry.”
Daniel rushed out of the studio, calling to his secretary on the way past to please cancel all of his afternoon appointments as he ran out the door to his car. He nearly floored it down to the elementary school and headed inside to the main office where his poor little seventh grader was sitting in the corner with a hoodie around her waist and tears on her cheeks. At the sight of him, Lucy jumped up and threw her arms around him tightly.
“Let’s get you home.” Daniel pressed a kiss to her head and signed her out at the front desk before taking her backpack for her and led her to the car.
Neither of them spoke on the drive home and Lucy sat curled up against the window with her eyes closed for most of it. When they got back to the apartment, Lucy went right to her room to get changed and Daniel pulled out his phone to text Florence as he made two cups of tea in the kitchen. Lucy came back out in a fresh hoodie and leggings, her face washed dry of tears, and she sat down at the breakfast bar with a sigh.
“You feeling okay? Not dizzy or anything?” Daniel asked.
Lucy shook her head, “No. Just embarrassed.”
“I bet.” Daniel passed her a mug and she thanked him softly. “But there’s no need to be embarrassed. This has happened numerous times to Mom too.”
“Really?” Lucy’s eyebrows raised nearly hopeful.
“Yep.” Daniel brushed his daughter’s hair from her face from across the counter. “I’m sure she can tell you all those stories when she gets home. Wanna pick a movie to watch?”
She smiled and nodded and they made their way to the living room with their tea and cookies. Lucy chose to watch Les Misérables since it was one of her favourite musicals and she curled up with Daniel as they watched it together. Florence came home a bit later from her lunch date with Callum, apologizing profusely to her daughter for missing her call.
“It’s okay, Mama.” Lucy whispered. “Dad took good care of me.”
“I’m glad.” Florence smiled at the both of them cuddled up together on the couch. She put her few things away and joined them.
It wasn’t long before the oldest two were home from school around 2:30 and they join the family for the last 1/3 of the movie. Of course, Daniel was eventually surrounded by four sobbing women as the film progressed, barely being able to even hear the soundtrack over their crying, but he didn’t dare leave, squished tightly between Florence and Lucy, both of them clinging onto him through their tears.
“This movie is fuckin’ sad.” Clementine mumbled as the credits rolled.
“After everything he just died in peace with his daughter at his side!” Penelope sobbed, curled up beside her mother.
“Cinematic excellence.” Lucy whimpered. “So good.”
“Okay,” Daniel started to get up but the girls pulled him back down, all of them talking and crying over each other about the film.
“Don’t you ever die, Daddy!” Lucy sobbed, wrapping her arms around his middle.
“Oh my gosh.” Daniel gaped. “I’m not dying. It was just a movie. Can we have dinner now?”
“Pizza?” Clementine suggested.
“Yeah, we can order pizza.” Daniel agreed.
Of course, by the time it arrived, Penelope was sent dry heaving into the kitchen sink with her nausea by only the smell of the food and Florence left her to rest on the couch with a warm pack and a blanket while the rest of the family ate. Daniel barely got his usual three slices as his other two daughters stole most of the pizza from the two boxes they ordered, talking loudly over top of each other.
When dinner was over and the dishes were put away and the girls went off to work on their homework, Daniel bent down beside the couch and brushed his hand over Penelope’s dark hair, making her stir and blink her eyes open, “Hey, bug. You feeling okay?”
She shook her head tiredly.
“Can I get you anything?”
“No.” Penelope shifted a little in pain. “But I can’t lay here…I gotta do my English homework.”
“Do you want medicine?”
“Maybe, yeah.”
“Okay.” Daniel stood up again and headed back into the kitchen to retrieve the bottle of pills from the cabinet and unscrewed the cap to pour two into his hand. He returned it and poured a glass of water and took both back to the living room.
“I feel like I’m gonna throw up.” Penelope breathed as she sat up slowly. “It hurts so bad.”
“These will start to help.” Daniel passed her the pills and then the water and she took them one at a time before finishing the water and holding it back to him.
“Thanks.”
“Lucy!” Clementine shouted from the dining room table, making Daniel and Penelope look over at them.
“What?!” the youngest sister snapped back.
“You’re hogging the entire table! I need my textbook here and you keep pushing it away!”
“I need to do my own work too!”
“What work?! You’re twelve.”
“Doesn’t mean I’m less important than you!”
“Yes, it does!”
“No, it doesn’t!”
“Yeah!”
“Nuh uh!”
“Girls! My gosh!” Daniel cut in, walking over to mediate. “Relax-”
“Relax? How can I relax when I’m going to flunk out because my stupid baby sister is hogging all the workspace!” Clementine shouted, throwing her eraser at Lucy from across the table.
“You’re rude!” Lucy crumpled up a piece of paper and threw it back.
“Hey. Hey!” Daniel put his hand between them. “Enough! One of you sit at the island so you can have your own space to work.”
“Get moving, baby sis.” Clementine snapped.
Lucy glared at her and slammed her binder shut before shuffling her things to the breakfast bar with annoyance.
Daniel put the empty glass in his hand in the dishwasher and headed down the hallway to finally put his bag away from work, leaving the girls to their own devices. He was already tired out and it was only the first day of the week, and he set his laptop on his desk with a heavy sigh.
“Tired already?” Florence asked teasingly as she walked out of the ensuite.
“Yeah.” Daniel chuckled, glancing at her before opening his laptop and typing in his password.
Florence wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her chin on his shoulder, “Do you have to do work right now?”
“At least a little bit since I left early today. Why?” Daniel stood up straighter and turned to face her.
“I need a restock. Can you be a sweet husband and go to the store to pick me up some?”
Daniel chuckled lightly, pulling her in for a tight hug and peppered kisses over her cheek, “Sure thing, baby. Anything else you need?”
“No.” Florence said. “Thank you.”
Daniel knew what she needed well after nearly twenty years of knowing her but he also took shopping orders from the girls as well, each of them giving specific instructions on what they needed. Daniel had reached the point that he wasn’t embarrassed about anything anymore as he pulled up to the cash at the drugstore with four different boxes of pads and tampons, a fistful of chocolate bars, a tub of ice cream, and an energy drink for himself.
“Girlfriend?” the young man at the cash asked lightheartedly.
“Wife and three daughters.” Daniel answered with a calm smile.
“Wow. Shit must be rough.”
Daniel shook his head as he tapped his debit card to pay for the items, “Nah. I wouldn’t trade it for a million dollars.”
#daniel seavey#why dont we#daniel seavey imagines#why dont we imagines#wdw#limelight#anything but mine
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Forget Me Nots- Epilogue
A wealthy young man falls overboard while vacationing with friends only to find himself with amnesia and a pretty young wife who seems determined to remind him what hard work and dedication really mean.
Warnings: Strong language, angry Min Yoongi inaccurately portrayed based upon the writer’s imagination,angst, eventual super fluff.
Pairing: Eventual Min Yoongi x reader
Word count: 3021
A/n: Well...this is the end my lovelies~ I am honestly so full of emotions right now I can’t even begin to sort through how I’m feeling lol. Sad because it’s over? Joyful because I’m happy with the ending. Excited to see everyone’s reactions. Yes to all of that~ I wanna thank @btsstan4life and @min-newt for lending themselves as characters to the story. To my new network @castlebangtan and the lovely bunch of angels that so graciously gave me the support I needed to push through the feels and finally get this out there. To my daughter for being the amazing sweetheart and always supporting my stories by asking me to read them to her at night. And to you, the person reading this right now? Thank you for the journey, thank you for the support and kind words. The likes and reblogs boost my confidence and allow me the motivation to push forward. To y/n and Yoongi, I know this was a tough journey, but the end is finally here. I wish you both happiness and joy and I hope you can find peace in the ending I’ve written for you. Thank you for allowing me to tell your story and...good bye~
<<Chapter 10
As the sound of the ambulance’s siren disappeared into the distance the woman found herself sitting on the floor. Back pressed into the cool wood of the front door her eyes stared listlessly into the distance, mind empty and yet so very full of the pain and devastation that was their last conversation.
“You let me fall in love with you!”
His final words before his collapse rang through the house, filling it with a weight that no amount of crying could have chased away.
Her two pups pressed in close to her, each seeking to give their owner some sort of comfort in the numb grief she found herself wrapped within. Champ pressed into her side, nose nudging her cheek occasionally as Kaia curled the entirety of her upper body on her lap. The woman’s fingers mindlessly combed through Kaia’s silky fur, head leaning into Champ’s shoulder as the first sob slipped free.
“Guys...I fucked up…” She hiccupped, tears finally spilling down her cheeks as she burried her face into Champ’s chest. The shepherd licked at her temple, a tiny whine escaping him as he sought to comfort his owner in the best way he could.
She couldn’t understand where this grief was coming from. Him remembering his past should have come as a relief. Right?
She’d no longer have to worry about how to break the news to him, what to do about the strange man that’d come to live in her house for the past week. Never again have to think about the soft secret smiles he gave the dogs as he sat curled into the sofa, fingers tracing shapes in their fur as they watched the sun set out the window.
Not have to worry about the scent of sandalwood that seemed etched into his skin that would waft up every time he passed by her. Or the strange butterflies that danced in her belly when she’d wake up to the scent of breakfast and coffee each morning.
Her sobs grew louder, inconsolable as the anguish that tormented her heart grew in size, consuming her soul with her realization.
“Oh god...I fell in love with him.”
***
The sterile scent of hospital served as a solid reminder and wake up call as she made her way to the front desk in search of her husb...in search of Yoongi.
The nurse pointed her in the direction of his room and she swallowed harshly, fingers digging crescents into her palms as she hefted the bag of belongings she’d gathered to return to him.
Standing before the hospital room door she steeled herself, unsure of what to expect but knowing it was possible that she’d get turned away immediately. But this was something she had to do. At least that’s what she’d said to convince herself. She knew she didn’t stand a chance in earning or even begging for forgiveness. But she could only hope that she’d get the chance to say good bye.
“Miss you can’t be here. This is a private room.” A sharply dressed man approached her, dark sunglasses hiding the obvious gaze of what could only be a security guard.
“I umm...I was just returning his…”
“You should leave. Access to this room is forbidden.” His stern tone left no room for argument and she ducked her head in acknowledgement.
Dashing away she paused at the nurse’s station, making a quick and wavering request that the belongings be returned to the man she knew she’d never see again.
***
“Y/n, can I speak to you in my office please?”
She glanced up from her paperwork, flashing her boss a soft smile before shuffling the paperwork to the side and standing to follow him.
“Something the matter Troy?” She asked as she closed the office door behind her.
“Ah, nah. Nothing’s wrong. I just wanted to let you know that the company responsible for the wrecked carpet cleaner paid to have the machine replaced. So you don’t have to worry it.”
She frowned, eyes wandering to the window overlooking the dock full of ships outside. “Did you ask them to or…”
“They actually reached out. When they returned the Veloce it was actually really clean so I wasn’t sure that we’d hear from them after outside of a review but ah…” He glanced down at a sticky note, squinting at his own handwriting before smiling up at her. “A Namjoon called, said he wanted to apologize to you for all the trouble and to thank you for everything you did to help.”
A mental image of smiling dimple filled cheeks flashed across her mind and she smiled sadly, nodding to Troy before leaving the office to return to work.
“I...guess it’s all over now huh?”
***
“So you’re telling me it took you six months to finally hire a new dishwasher?”
Rose grinned, digging into her burger as she nodded in reply to Devani’s question.
“Yeah, and the new kid is a hell of a worker too! Kind of cute. Right up your alley chicka.” She snorted at the blush rising up the girl’s cheeks. “It was damn near impossible to find a new hire after Yoon...ah... after the last guy quit the way he did.”
Rose’s panicked gaze darted to y/n, though the woman seemed lost in her own thoughts and wasn’t much paying attention to the conversation between her two best friends. Her dull gaze wandered their favorite coffee shop, listlessly wandering from face to face as if she was fruitlessly caught in a subconscious search for someone that wasn’t there.
“Hey...you with us y/n?” Devani chirped up, giving her a sad smile as the dazed woman’s gaze returned to their table.
“Hmm?” Her fork moved for the first time since the salad had been placed before her, though it just picked mindlessly at the leafy meal as her focus struggled to take in the concerned faces before her.
“You’re stuck again love.” Rose said quietly, lips turning down into a frown as she watched her heartbroken friend give her an empty smile.
“Yeah, I guess I am.” She quietly hummed, reaching forward to take a sip from her now lukewarm cup of coffee.
The friends sat in silence for a while, allowing the world to revolve and pass around them as they each sat in their own little worlds of quiet contemplation.
A notification dinged on Devani’s phone, causing the girl to perk up with a grin as she swiped it open and eagerly read the email she’d just received.
“Ah! Oh my god I got them!” She squealed, hugging the phone to her chest and bouncing in her seat with all of the energy of a puppy given its first ball.
“What? Dude chill.” Rose giggled, reaching out to calm her friend with a warm grip to her arm.
“The VIP tickets I entered that contest for last week!” Devani grinned, turning the phone screen to Rose to reveal its secrets. “They just sent me an email letting me know I won!”
“No way that’s great!” Y/n grinned, the festive atmosphere snapping her out of her funk in favor of celebrating her friend’s good fortune.
“How many did you get?” Rose asked, leaning back into her seat and tapping her fingers absentmindedly on the table top.
Devani flipped the phone back around, eyes darting to and fro as she scanned the email’s contents. “Hmm...3 tickets. No way that’s freaking perfect!” She looked up at the women excitedly, her eyes practically sparkling in the brightness of the cafe’s lights. “You guys will come with me right? It won’t be the same without you!”
Rose nodded eagerly, grin bright and on display until she turned to see y/n’s frown darkening the mood slightly.
“I don’t know guys… I don’t think I’d be up for it….”
“No way! We’re not letting you miss this! It’s been ages since we had a girl’s night out and we refuse to go without you.” Rose glanced over to Dev, glaring at her dejected look for a moment and then grinning in triumph as it turned instantly to a look of determination.
“Rose is right. All for one and one for all.” She shook her head at the older woman’s protests. “No we’re all going together or not at all.”
“But you worked so hard to get those tickets. You can’t just not go Devi!” she tried hard to protest, stammering out her opposition to the idea.
But the girls were unrelenting, insisting over and over until they’d worn the woman down into going.
The three giggled, making plans quickly and allowing the excitement to flow through them at the prospect of the concert awaiting them that coming weekend.
Perhaps this was just what she needed to pull her out of that cloud of funk after all.
***
“Hyung! We’re on in an hour. Have you got the new battery pack for your in-ear?” Jimin’s sweet voice cut through the brooding Yoongi’s chaotic thoughts, snapping him back to reality.
Nodding at Jimin’s words he stood from the hairstylist’s chair, brushing at the blue jeans and brightly colored shirt that was the stage outfit for their first song of the night. It hadn’t taken much for him to regain his memories, thoughts that’d remained locked away and dreams that at some point in the week he’d spent questioning his existence had disappeared all at once came flooding back in that one final argument.
And yet here he stood, returned to his life as an idol and thrust back into the spotlight like nothing had ever happened but unable to put a name to the emotion that’d sat heavy in his chest since the day he’d been released from the hospital only to realize he might never see that soft smiling face again.
“Yoongi-ssi, they’re letting the VIP’s back for a few minutes before they get sat. Did you want to go say hi before you go out?” His manager looked up from the tablet with their schedule, holding Yoongi’s gaze for a moment before nodding and tapping out a quick message.
“I’ll let them know you’re on the way.”
The room cleared out, leaving him alone with his thoughts as he continued to stare at the reflection judging him in the mirror.
He’d changed a bit since the incident. Long gone was the minty green hair he’d sported, replaced in favor of a silvery grey number that was slowly growing on him. He’d gained back some of the weight he’d lost when the stress had been eating at him from an upcoming album release that’d gone far better than he’d expected. All in all he felt better, healthier, content with his standing in life where before he’d just felt frustration and rage against the things he couldn’t change. And yet something still felt like it was missing. A certain emptiness in his soul that seemed like it was waiting to be filled. With what he just couldn’t be sure.
Turning away from the mirror and dismissing the thoughts he left the room, entering the bustle of the corridors post concert and making his way to the meeting room his manager had set aside for the VIPs to meet with him and his band mates.
The room was filled with sound, a cacophony of cheer and joy. Fans meeting their idols and idols enamored with the tales and thanks that came with meeting their supporters.
Namjoon walked over to him, grin splitting his face from ear to ear as he clapped Yoongi on the shoulder.
“Don’t look so glum hyung. There’s someone here waiting for you. I think she’s got some things she’s been waiting to say to you.”
The cryptic words left Yoongi feeling confused, and somehow apprehensive as he walked deeper into the room. A few young women stopped him, crowding in to give him praise over his latest solo song as young men hung back with shy grins echoing the joy the far bolder sex seemed so eager and willing to share with him.
His idol smile set in place, a kind and soft affair that always seemed to either placate his fans or rile them up depending on the context. His manager handed him a silver sharpie, giving the fans the go ahead to hand him their albums and shirts to be signed with all the flourish of a practiced celebrity. Yoongi made quick work of them, assuring the chittering ARMY that he appreciated their support and loved them wholeheartedly.
Eventually those around him moved on, spotting one or another of the members that’d chosen to enter the room at that time. Attention drifted away from him, giving him a moment of respite that he capitalized on by moving to the refreshment table in search of a water bottle to quench his sudden thirst.
As he reached for one of the label free bottles a tiny hand darted out, touching the bottle just as his own wrapped around the dainty wrist. He froze, a chill of fear and excitement rushing through his veins at the sight.
He knew that hand, those work worn fingers that trembled beneath his grip. His eyes trailed up the sun kissed skin of her arm, eyes meeting her own fear filled ones as his grip tightened.
“Yoongi…” She gasped, eyes filled with a number of emotions and the growing sparkling of tears.
As they held each others gazes, unbeknownst to them the managers began clearing the room on Namjoon’s orders, emptying it for the two to have a private moment to themselves. Y/n friends watched, grins spreading wide as Namjoon led them to the door.
“Finally!” The trio whispered in unison, sharing giggles and chatting away as the door was closed behind them.
“You came.”
“You’re here.”
They spoke together, each refusing to acknowledge the heat rising to their cheeks as Yoongi finally released her wrist and cleared his throat to fill the following awkward silence.
“I um… I didn’t realize that this was your concert.” She wrapped her arms around her stomach, shuffling her feet as she focused her eyes on a scuff mark on the floor in front of him.
“When I saw Namjoon and the others I well...I tried to leave but they wouldn’t let me…”
Yoongi watched her, eyes taking in her anxious form as he listened to her ramble on.
“Why would you leave?” He asked.
Her gaze snapped to him, eyes wide with fear as she fumbled for her next words.
“I, well I mean… I didn’t think you’d want to see me. Especially after I...after everything.”
“After you lied to me?” She nodded at his words and opened her mouth to reply but he refused, continuing on as he began listing off what was on his mind.
“After you took care of me? Giving me food and shelter and comfort when the absolutely terrifying moment of losing my memory to an assault happened? Allowing me to live in a fantasy that involved giving me more care and love than anyone ever has in my entire life?”
He stepped forward, crowding her with his presence as he stared down at her with all of the heat and passion that had been building within him over the past few months since he’d been away from her.
“You gave me the break I needed y/n. A peaceful existence that I never thought I could have in this messed up stressful life that is the idol world.” He reached out, hands coming up to caress her trembling arms as he moved impossibly closer.
“Do you have any idea how often I’ve thought about you since I left? How much I regret what I said? How much I hate myself for hurting you the way I did after everything you did for me?”
She inhaled sharply, the scent of sandalwood and male musk that was so uniquely his flooding her senses and filling her with an impossible hope that she hadn’t thought possible.
“I just...I lied to you Yoongi. How could you...how could you ever forgive me?” She choked on the words, sobs spilling forth as she buried her face in his chest.
His heart broke, seeing first hand the impact his callous words had had on the sweetest person he’d ever met in his life.
“Forgive you? If anything I’m the one that should be begging your forgiveness.” He wrapped his arms around her, clinging tightly to her as he buried his face in the warmth of her hair and inhaled deeply.
“I love you y/n. Honestly and truly. When I thought I’d never see you again it hurt. I couldn’t breath from the thought of losing you, of never seeing that sweet smiling face. Of coming home to see those goofy dogs of yours greeting me every day and knowing that I had finally...finally come home.” He kissed the top of her head before stepping back and crouching slightly to gaze into her tear streaked face.
“Could you ever forgive me angel? Please, I’m begging you. Let’s start over huh? Do this right.”
Her breath caught in her throat. The look of pure remorse and adoration that he was giving her was all she could ever ask for.
“Of course Yoongi.” She nodded emphatically, launching herself into his arms once more. “Of course I can forgive you. I...I love you too Yoongi.”
Their lips met, soft and desperate and perhaps a tiny bit awkward as teeth clashed and tongues fought to find their rhythm. But slowly they calmed, finding a balance in the rush of love that flowed through them as they inhaled each other. Breaking apart they grinned at each other, one lost and finally found and the other saved and saved again as they met once more in a passionate kiss that filled each of them with a sense that yes, they could finally be happy in each other’s arms.
As her tiny forget me not earrings flashed in the light of the waiting room they knew they were finally home.
#castle bangtan#yoongi x reader#min yoongi x reader#bts min yoongi#bangtan suga#suga amnesia#yoongi amnesia#yoongi amnesia au#yoongi imagine#bts imagine#yoongi fluff#bts fluff#bts x reader insert#yoongi x reader insert#bts fanfiction#yoongi fanfiction#my writing
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Icarus Falls - III - The Good Doctor Comes Home
Story Summary:
“You’ll never leave me alone right?“
“You think I’d actually let you go?”
A story about the slow descent and corruption of a lonely man, a demon who learns that bonds go both ways, brothers who deeply regrets their words spoken out of anger, and a conflicted man watching them all fall down from the distance. Here’s a Puppet!Chase AU that was written with extreme self-indulgence so beware and read the tags before entering.
Chapter Summary: Chapter title says it all lol but also a breather chapter
Pairing/s: None, Platonic
Character/s: Jack McLoughlin, Chase Brody, Antisepticeye, Henrik Von Schneeplestein, Mentions of Other Septic Egos
Genre: Angst, Fluff
Chapter Warning/s: Self-Deprecating Thoughts (Thoughts like I’m not as good as the others, etc.), Sadness, extremely vague mentions of torture
(Archive Of Our Own Edition)
(Prev. Chapter)
Do you ever have one of those days when you wake up feeling both numb, and raw and sensitive on the inside and thinking ‘Ah. It’s one of those days…’ and wondering if it’s even worth the effort to open your eyes and move?
Chase felt emotionally and physically drained with a rocking throbbing headache as he woke up in a cold empty bed, tucked in like a child under the blankets. He stared up at the ceiling blankly, looking and thinking of nothing in particular until the memories began to come in crystal clear film in his mind. His hand twitched as he remembered the warmth of another person enveloping him even if that person had been his mortal enemy.
A part of him wanted to hate himself for missing, for yearning for the addicting affectionate touches that his enemy showered him with while he had been dreadfully sick. After all, had he become so desperate after nearly nine months of having no positive physical contact with other people that he would take comfort in the demon who was the main cause for why it was happening in the first place? However, a bigger part of himself was just tired, so very tired of the constant emotional olympics his self-hatred would force him to go through every single day.
He closed his eyes and for a moment, he allowed his own mind and heart to fool himself and pretend that the last part of yesterday never happened. He chose to believe in the fleeting happiness of the illusion that his best friend had never gone into a coma and tht Anti was merely a part of an excruciatingly long nightmare.
When he opened his eyes again, the sun had gone down outside but he can’t find the energy in himself to give a fuck about time moving on without him.
Chase heard his phone buzz with new notifications. He stomped down the flickering spark of hope that it would be any of his brothers finally answering his messages and calls. He knows that he can’t keep blocking out the world like this especially when the world needs him to be Jack McLoughlin so with an exhausted grunt, he slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position and reached over to the left bedside drawer to grab his phone.
He pressed the button on the side and was relieved to see that it was just Doctor Adam rather than one of Jack’s friends asking Jack if he was alright.
Dr. Adam:
Mr. Brody? You haven’t replied to my messages for a while.
Is everything alright?
The concern from the doctor melted some of the ice numbing his heart. This man really reminded him of Henrik albeit softer and more formal.
Chase:
I’m ok doc.
But I don’t think I’ll be able to drop by for a while.
Think I caught a bug on the way back or something and I don’t want to transfer any of it to Jack.
I’ll try to take a few more days off until I’m sure I’m okay. :)
Dr. Adam:
Ah! I thought so…
You’ve never missed a day visiting your brother unless you were really sick.
So I was worried. But since you said that you’re okay I have to trust that you know yourself and your limits by now.
Do take care of yourself! Get a lot of sleep, eat something even if it’s just buttered toast (altho I would prefer if you ate healthier foods…), drink lots of liquid, and make sure you take your medicine.
Chase:
Yea, I’ve been doing all that
Just keep me updated on Jack pls?
Dr. Adam:
But of course, I know how much you worry over your brother.
Anyway, I’ll leave you to rest.
I hope you get well soon!
‘I hope I do too, Doc.’ Chase wiped a hand over his weary face with a loud sigh.
He placed his phone down on his bed when his eyes caught sight of something sharing the same drawer that his phone had been placed in earlier. It was his medicine and it was placed on top of what appeared to be a note. He knows what the pills were obviously for but the note awakened some of his curiosity and anger.
It was obvious who wrote that note.
He wanted to run over to his desk and grab his lighter to burn that seemingly innocent looking white paper as anybody with a shred of common sense should. However he knows himself. He knows his curiosity over what the note would contain would itch at him for a long long time if he didn’t find out what it said.
He inhaled deeply and slowly let the air out as a low hiss through gritted teeth while he mussed up his already messed up hair.
“Fucker,” Chase insulted both the demon for taking advantage of his thrice damned curiosity that could rival the stubbornness of a spoiled cat, and himself for falling for this obvious show of manipulation as he forced his arm to reach out and grabbed the paper.
He crumpled the note into a wrinkly ball and stared down at it with some trepidation. What horrific message will this paper contain? Was it going to contain some blackmail worthy secret? Maybe taunt him for his complete breakdown yesterday? Jesus Christ… He literally fell apart on top of the bastard. He’d wish he could erase the memory but Anti would probably take that as permission to completely fuck him up mentally and maybe possess him as a little treat.
Well, he can’t keep stalling for more time like a coward. He uncrumpled the paper, smoothing it out on his covered lap, and read it with some trepidation.
One pill every eight hours from the moment you wake up.
Going to be busy for a while. Don’t wait up for me, little brother.
You’re still sick so don’t have a breakdown every other hour.
Remember
I’M ALWAYS WATCHING
Chase stared down at the note that was practically dripping with sarcasm with an expressionless gaze. A form of calm had settled down upon him and he almost absentmindedly started to rip the note in half. He doesn’t know what to feel about the laughably simple note. Should he get angry? Should he spend the time away from the bastard trying to decode some sort of hidden message from it?
In the end, he decided that it wasn’t worth the energy to get annoyed or obsessed over the taunt. He spent the next few minutes tearing the note into teeny tiny pieces before he left it scattered all over the top of his lap in unsalvageable scraps.
The ripping and tearing actually brought him some satisfaction which he relished in no matter how tiny it was. He swept the mess off his bed with a wide wave and watched it free fall to the floor like snow during winter. The man slid off his bed and spitefully ignored the medicine before he dragged himself over to the bathroom to freshen up.
He took a short shower, changed into fresh new indoor clothes, and dried his hair with a towel before brushing it up until it stayed neat and fluffy on his head. A sudden burst of productive energy suddenly shot through his entire body when he looked over the entirety of his room and realized just how filthy he had let it become over the months.
Chase could almost hear Anti sneering at him at the back of his head, telling him how useless and broken he was when nobody is there to pull him forward like a fucking donkey.
A massive wave of spite mixed in with his burst of energy and he began walking around the room to gather up his dirty clothes to put inside a hamper that he carried over to his laundry room to load up inside the washing machine. Then before working the machine, he went back to his room to change his bed sheets and blanket to a clean one before hefting them all up to the laundry room. While the washer was humming and vibrating as it got to work, he grabbed two big trash bags from his current location before he walked back to his bedroom.
The first step to feeling better after another one of your long episodes is to clear up the clutter that built up around you. It will help you associate clearing up as another way of resetting your own point of view.
A tiny smile twitched up at the corner of his lips as Henrik’s gruff but gentle voice as he coaxed him from his bed in the past. He separated his trash into two bags and straightened up to look around his now cleaner room. Chase tied up the trash bags so that none of them would spill out before he opened up his window and smiled faintly at the refreshing evening breeze that brushed against his heated face.
Then he walked over to his closet to bring out the Roomba that he hasn’t used for a while, letting out a victorious ‘heh’ when it still worked and placed it in the middle of his room before turning it on to roam around the floor to suck up the dust that built up over the past months.
He gave his cleaner and brighter bedroom another look over with satisfaction pulsing in his chest before making two trips up and down the stairs to take out the trash that he just collected and move the piled up dirty mugs on his desk down to the kitchen.
“How’s this for being useless and broken, asshole?” Chase spitefully said into the empty air towards the absent being who insulted him daily when he was there. “Fuck you.”
Chase huffed to himself in the middle of the kitchen while he was crouched over his dishwasher, loading it up with all the dirty dishes. After he closed the thing’s door, he realized as his stomach growled rather loudly, that he was pretty hungry.
“I’m hungry but I’m not in the mood for anything too heavy or chewy…” Chase hummed while he browsed the contents of his fridge. He leaned over and grabbed the covered bowl at the back of the fridge. “Oh hey, this was the cream of mushroom soup I ordered a week ago… It doesn’t smell bad so I guess it’s still fine!”
He heated it up on the stove before scooping them all up into a clean bowl. He placed a spoon with it before he walked over to the living room. Chase turned on the TV before laying on his side at the couch while he slurped up his soup.
‘Man… If Hen was here he’d probably be telling me that this soup isn’t healthy enough for me,’ Chase chuckled to himself, eyes misting over with nostalgia over the memories of his most fussy older brother. ‘Then he’d threaten to tie me up on a chair and feed me his horrid homemade food.’
Henrik might be one of the smartest people in the world but his cooked food… There’s a reason why he was never allowed to cook for them during their weekly gatherings. He remembered Marvin telling him a story about his first time of coming into contact with Henrik’s Mystery Food and swearing on his name and magic that it had a living soul.
“It’s not that bad!” He would hear Henrik stomping his feet on the floor while imagining the lethal glare he’d give his brothers while they gently redirected him even as he’s protesting the discrimination loudly from the kitchen.
“Henrik please… Every single bite Jackie makes of your food immediately sends him to the hospital and you of all people know that he’s immune to nearly all sorts of poison.” Jack squeezed the fuming doctor’s tensed shoulders in an attempt to calm him down.
“Come on, Jack-Jack. You don’t have to sweeten the truth up for our mother hen,” Marvin’s delighted and mischief-filled voice would snicker from the other room where he was probably curled up on the floor near the window to get the maximum sunshine. “Henrik, your food tastes so bad that Jackie’s mind blocked out any memory of the taste to protect him from relieving the trauma.”
“As if your cooking is any better!” Henrik would shoot back scathingly.
“At least I can survive on it on my own and feed some of it to others!” Marvin would have puffed up as he readied himself for their banter.
“Guys please,” Jackie, ever the peacemaker, would try to calm the duo down while Jack wouldn’t even try and raise the white flag the second they start.
Chase laughed to himself at the present time as he recalled the loud racket Marvin and Henrik would make while they exchanged light-hearted insults. He would’ve been in the kitchen, humming and smiling while he busied himself with his cooking. A few minutes later would find Creator and Hero skulking back to his safe grounds with their tails tucked neatly between their legs and trying to help him but he’d just easily shoo them off to pout at the kitchen table.
‘I wish Jamie had experienced that before everything went to complete shit,’ Chase’s smile turned bittersweet at that stray thought. ‘Henrik and Jack would’ve loved him. He and Hen would probably spend some nights drinking tea in the middle of the night with each other. He’d have helped curtail some of Marvy’s sharp nature with a light smack on the shoulder. Jackie would’ve been so glad to have someone helping him act as the peacemaker of the family. Jack… Jack would’ve adored him. He’d gush about how Jamie was so spirited, so sassy, expressive and—and how he and Marvy always loved so fiercely…’
Chase licked his spoon clean (Marvin would’ve been looking at him with disgust and tell him that he’s a mannerless savage which… bold words for someone who would lick their balls while in their cat form) and dropped it down with a loud ear ringing clang on the now empty bowl before placing them on the living room table. He scooched over and laid down on his back on the couch and crossed his arms at the back of his head as a makeshift pillow while he reminisced.
Anti might insult him for doing nothing else but think of the past but it was the only thing that gave Chase the energy to keep moving forward even if he didn’t really want to. For the sake of all his loved ones who would’ve wanted to experience those memories in the future with them after all of these bullshit… Yeah, he’d trudge through all the painful days for them.
He closed his eyes and tried his darnest to remember anything memorable that had happened since the others left him behind but other than Anti’s unforgettable presence, everything else passed by in a blur.
“Damn,” Chase sighed, his smile lacking any light nor humor to it. “Anti really had a point when he said that I’m useless without the others huh?”
It is not your fault, Chase. Depression has the tendency to mix all your memories together in an unrecognizable blur. Do not worry. We are always here to help you remember.
“Unfortunately Doc,” Chase sighed as he sat up and grabbed the dirty bowl and spoon to place them together in the washer. “The only person left who’ll help me remember the past months is a complete bastard who I wouldn’t entrust my head to even if I had to choose between him and pain.”
Not that he really wanted to remember anything… He’s pretty sure that if he remembered anything it would just be of him whining about his loneliness, Anti fucking him up, and trying to keep up the Jack mask so that nobody else would find out that something had gone wrong.
He went back upstairs and moved the wet clothes from the washing machine to the dryer and loaded up the dirty bed sheets and blanket to the washing machine before heading straight for his bedroom. The Roomba died under his desk, having lost all of its battery while he was downstairs, and he scrounged through his dark closet for its charging adapter. Once the Roomba was set up and charging, he changed into his new pajamas and slipped back under his blankets.
He continued ignoring the set of pills on the drawer and turned on his side so that he could curl up under the sheets. Chase powered on Jack’s phone and waited for it to load so that he could check the comatose man’s social media. Another mentally and emotionally draining part of his imitation job was to maintain the Jack mask while pretending that the man was A-Okay and there was no reason for concern.
First, he pulled up Twitter and made a face when he realized that somebody posted something on the account while he was sick. Thank god it was just a little message to everyone that he was going to be on a break for a while because he was sick. It was still creepy that Anti could perfectly copy Jack’s mannerisms as he looked through the little retweets-interaction with everybody. Even he had some hard time fully copying his best friend’s posting quirks.
Either way, it was still annoying and stressful to Chase how the demon could keep pulling these kinds of shit with Jack’s social media. Maybe he should change to passwords and login info to everything while Anti was god knows where.
…
Chase sighed and shrugged. Then again, it’s not like that would be effective anyway. He knows that Anti was the one who keeps reblogging art of himself on the tumblr account even though he was pretty sure he changed the password nearly fifty times over the past few months. It never fazed him.
Speaking of tumblr… A part of him wanted to resent the community for giving the demon so much power through their attention via art, theories, and stories but he knows that it wouldn’t be fair of him to blame them for something that is completely out of their control. It’s not like they knew that the thing with Anti which they knew to be an ‘ARG-like’ story for the channel was actually his and his brother’s reality. Most of them were just people who were enthusiastic for the escapism their ‘story’ provided and he couldn’t exactly fault them for that.
He decided to update twitter that he’s feeling much better than before and that he’ll go back to filming videos tomorrow. The replies were almost immediate as the community reassured him that it would be fine if he took more days off to recover fully and he can’t help but smile at their unending support even if it was actually directed towards Jack. He knows that they wouldn’t mind it if he took an entire week off but he gets really antsy when he’s not putting up any content for the channel.
It feels like if he doesn’t keep it up, there’ll be nothing left for Jack to wake up to, all the hard work he put into this channel and community has been one of his brother’s ultimate joys. He doesn’t want to see Jack’s devastation if he also loses the community that he so dearly loved to the coma.
Besides… It’s not like he can afford to slack off while the others are trying their hardest to save Jack. This and taking care of Jack was the only thing that he could do to be of some use rather than become another burden to his brothers.
After he read and replied to a few more retweets, he turned off Twitter and moved his attention to the other big gathering place for the community. He tapped Tumblr’s app button and scrolled down Jack’s blog and let out a sharp, annoyed exhale when he saw that Anti had been busy reblogging things related to him or him torturing the other egos while Chase had been indisposed. A lot of the theorists hit the nail on the head when they theorized that the one who had been reblogging Anti-related things without any caption had been Anti.
It must have been something about Tumblr’s wonky programming but Anti can’t say anything or it’ll come out all glitched and zalgoed. Of course, he could’ve gotten maximum attention that way but he probably thought that it would be much better to have the fans stewing and trying to obsess over every single action that may or may not relate to Anti by having it all be a mystery.
Sometimes Chase wondered if maybe he and his brothers could make use of the community’s eagle-eyed observations that tend to hit right most of the time to help them find out a way to save Jack. He’s lost count of how many times they’ve managed to notice something that he hasn’t noticed such as a little subtle glitch on the video’s audio, a flash of someone in the back of his facecam, or even changes in the description or titles of the videos that was definitely not made by him.
Their skills would’ve been impressive if it wasn’t downright frightening for how obsessed they seem to be with Anti.
He reblogged a few cool artworks and edits with little words of encouragement under their captions. Then he’d like some of the little sneak peeks to the daily lives of the community members that always made him smile because at least these funky little people are doing their best to live. It’s a nice reminder and boost to the morale that there was a reason why he was also doing this other than to keep the channel up and running for Jack’s comeback.
Chase stretched out his arms and legs with a jawbreaking yawn as he felt the sleepiness settle in. He looked at the time on his phone and made a face when he saw how late it was. No wonder his eyes were starting to blur with sleep. He decided to set his alarm clock up for the morning. He’s gotta wake up early to prepare himself to go under the Jack mask and record a video after all.
The tired man scooched underneath the blanket, covering himself up to his bed and curled up into a tight ball while tugging the sheets around him. A spark of pride welled up inside his chest when he thought back on how he managed to do a little bit of productivity in tidying up his bedroom. While he definitely started out the day rough and numb, he managed to salvage it by the end.
At the end of the day, it’s these teeny tiny baby steps that would bring you much farther than you thought when you look back in the future. So do not sell yourself short, Chase Brody.
Never forget that we are always proud of you no matter how inconsequential you believe your little progress was.
Henrik’s gruff but gentle voice echoed through his mind, easily drowning out all the insecurities and dark voices sneering at him for his pride. For the first time in a long while, Chase fell asleep with a faint but sincere smile on his lips.
0-0-0-0-0-0-0
“Maybe you should’ve jumped higher for that trick shot so that you wouldn’t have fallen over and broken your foot,” Jack’s voice shook with silent laughter as he leaned on Chase’s side while they both watched Henrik scrambling around, fussing over Chase’s foot that was placed in a cast, and fluffing up pillows to squeeze behind Chase’s back while he’s relaxed on the couch and worrying his head over whether his broken foot was raised high enough.
Henrik spun around and levelled a death glare towards his creator who instinctively raised both hands in a show of harmlessness, the doctor bared his teeth at him, “If you keep encouraging him to do more reckless acts I will break your own leg.”
Chase coughed and choked on a laugh and gave his doctor older brother a smile full of innocence and sunshine when he swiftly turned around to glare at him as well while Jack sputtered in the background. Jackie was dying on the floor. He sounded like he was about to upgrade from his booming cackling to wheezing, dying laughter.
“Wh— You took an oath to never harm another human when you became a doctor!” Chase turned his head to look at Jack when he felt him sitting up straight and leaning forward with an outraged look.
“I did no such thing,” Henrik snubbed. “It was whichever fake Schneeplestein that magic made to explain my existence in this universe that made such an oath.”
“You’re still a doctor!” Jack yelled vehemently, slapping a hand on his knees.
Henrik sniffed. He looked down at Jack from behind his nose and made him feel like he was some worm tainting the bottom of his shiny shoes. Then the doctor dramatically turned his back on the pouting man obviously giving him the cold shoulder.
“Chaaaase,” Jack twisted his body to ‘sob’ into his best friend’s shoulder. “Henny’s being mean to me again!”
“There, there,” Chase snickered as he patted the older man’s curly hair. “I won’t let the big bad doctor bully you anymore.”
Jack turned his head so that his cheek was pressed on top of Chase’s shoulder and he stuck his tongue out at Henrik who rolled his eyes back at him.
A massive white maine coone glided into the chaotic living room, jumping up on the back of the couch, and strolled over to smack Jack’s face with his outrageously long and fluffy tail—while ignoring the annoyed yelp ‘Marvin!’ before the poor man started sneezing and cursing the magician’s existence—as he slid down a bemused Chase’s torso into his lap. He rubbed his fluffy body against his little brother’s chest with a loud meow for his greeting.
“Hey to you too, Marvy,” Chase chuckled as the cat began to purr.
Marvin’s purr grew louder until he was practically like a growling motorcycle and arched his spine when Chase’s fingers stroked him from the bridge of his pink nose down to his tailbone. The heavy white cat kneaded his claws into Chase’s baggy shorts before circling around—ignoring Chase’s agonized groan at his weight—and curling up into a smug self-satisfied ball on his lap.
“You satisfied now, Drama Queen?” Chase teased the magician with a fond smile while he scratched the cat on the perfect spot behind his ears. “I think we should put your cat form on a diet. You’re getting pretty heavy.”
The cat nipped at his fingers with a hint of a warning bite but Chase just tapped his prickly older brother on his nose as a gentle reprimand. He only got a bunch of annoyed chattering for his daring gall to touch his majesty.
“Marvin, you better not bite anyone again,” Henrik dryly warned the magician who hissed at him. “Don’t think I can’t sedate you into going to the vet and getting you neutered.”
Marvin let out an offended yowl and attempted to stuff his massive unit of a body under Chase’s shirt, drawing giggles from the man who tried pushing his fluffy butt away as his squirming body dragged his soft fur over his ticklish stomach.
“Marvin, you fucker!” Chase squealed and tried to pull out the squirming cat who somehow managed to find the perfect position and perk out only his head from under his shirt. “Really? You’re going to subject me to your stinky butt for the entire movie marathon?”
His only response was a thick tail that thwapped his sputtering face.
“Aww… It’s just his way of showing you his love, Chasey-wasey,” Jackie giggled without looking up from his phone. “Also I can’t blame Marv for wanting to snuggle up to you. You’re like a portable heater slash teddy bear.”
“Yeah well, I’d say Marvy would be like a teddy bear too if it weren’t for the fact that he weighs like a rock on top of my kidneys,” Chase deadpanned before smacking Marvin’s back through his shirt irritably. “Use your claws on me again and I’ll neuter you myself without the help of a vet.”
Jack snickered at the irritated mewl from the cat while Henrik huffed and rolled his eyes at their antics. The doctor sat on the right couch seat and pulled the side lever up so that he could fully recline his body and feet. Jack leaned over and grabbed the remote from the table in front of him and Chase.
“Everybody finally settled down for our movie night?” He asked, just to make sure so that nobody would suddenly whine in that childish sort of voice that he didn’t wait for them again.
coughJackiecough
Jackie gave him a thumbs up and finally looked up from his phone. He was laying on his stomach on the blanket he set on the floor with a variety of pillows forming his nest around him. His own bowl of popcorn and a massive bottle full of Sprite was set in front of him.
Chase makes an agreeing grunt while he leaned on him on his side, taking care not to move his cast while Marvin chirruped from under his shirt, his little head poking out directing his nose to the bowl of popcorn on the table. Henrik just shrugged and gestured his head towards the screen.
“Just get on with it. If anybody was not ready I am sure that they’ll be letting out some godforsaken complaint through their loud mouths,” Henrik scathingly said but his eyes glimmered with laughter, taking off the bite from his words. He merely arched an eyebrow at everyone when they childishly stuck out their tongues at him.
Jack huffed and shook his head at the brotherly banters. No family activity would be the same without these chaotic preparations and quips from the others. He pressed play on the remote and started the movie. He sat back on the couch with Chase, his smile unconsciously growing wider when the youngest ego scooched closer to him.
…
“Is he asleep?” Henrik asked in a hushed tone as he craned his neck to look at Chase’s face which was hiding away against Jack’s side.
Jack nodded with a gentle smile and pressed a finger against his lips in the universal sign for silence. He slowly began to shift himself so that he could move Chase into laying down fully on the couch and for his head to be placed on his lap. Henrik assisted him, carrying the younger ego’s legs into the couch and made sure that his injured foot was raised with a few pillows propped underneath and around it to keep it from moving.
Chase made a soft noise and pressed his cheek on Jack’s stomach while the older man petted his head, idly rubbing a thumb against the healed over scar that would ache from time to time especially when Chase is particularly emotional. The sleeping man sighed contentedly in his sleep and murmured something far too unintelligible for either man to hear. Henrik grabbed one of the free blankets remaining to place it over Chase, tucking him under the warm sheets.
“I’ll get the other blankets—Marvin!” Henrik hissed as the cat that had been watching them from the table, slowly walked over to jump on Chase’s chest. Chase’s breath hitched but thankfully he didn’t wake up. Chase wrapped his arms around the cat who had stretched himself out over his little brother’s body and tucked his head under his chin. “You’re so lucky he’s a heavy sleeper. If you woke him up I would have shaved you, you needy cat.”
The cat flicked his ears at Henrik and made a show of nuzzling the bottom of Chase’s chin and purring almost as loud as a starting motorcycle to spite the doctor by showing just how comfortable he was in his makeshift bed.
Jack rolled his eyes at the little drama queen before he looked back at Henrik with a pleading smile, “Blankets please? It’s pretty chilly around here at night.”
Henrik sighed and nodded. He carefully maneuvered himself out of the crowded living room. Jackie had spreaded out his entire body on his own side of the room, snoring lightly while drool trailed down his cheek. Henrik made sure that he didn’t touch on the territory of the unknowing human venus flytrap who’d snap his arms around your legs in a flash the moment you stepped within his area of attack. Last time one of them (poor Marvin… despite screaming and trying to squirm out of those iron arms...) fell for that trap, they had to deal with a clingy as a leech Jackie for the entire night.
He went upstairs to grab extra blankets and pillows for him and Jack since someone (Jackie…) hoarded most of them for their nest and one of the original blankets was placed over Chase. When he went back down, Marvin was already asleep, his cat body slowly moved up and down to his rhythmic breathing. Jack was staring down at Chase’s face with a blank look which generally meant that the man was probably thinking something that was bothering him again.
As he passed by his creator, he gave the man a gentle smack on the back of his head with his elbow. “This is not the time for complicated thoughts. This is family time.”
Jack jolted at the hit and his voice, turning his head to make a silly face at him.
“I know, I know, I just can’t help it, Hen,” Jack sighed and patted Chase’s head. He peered at the doctor when he saw what he was carrying. “Huh, you got those from the closet in the hallway?”
“Where else would I get it? Here,” Henrik made Jack lean over so that he could place two pillows on the back of his neck. “Support for your neck.”
“Thanks,” the other man gave him a thumbs up with one of his free hands. “Can you uh place my blanket over my lap? I’ll move Chase’s head a bit.”
“Wait your impatient butt. I am just going to move around the couch.” Henrik said as he walked over to his own spot to drop his pillows and blanket before moving over to Jack.
Jack carefully lifted Chase’s head so that Henrik could slip the blanket over his lap. He absentmindedly rubbed a thumb over the sleeping man’s head when his brows furrowed at the movement and he looked like he was about to wake from his sleep. Thankfully, he settled down once he was returned to his previous position only he curled closer to his creator’s warmth.
“Ah man, Chase really is the best little brother I could ever ask for,” Jack sighed with a fond smile softening the weariness from his face.
Henrik snorted, giving Chase a little pat on his head before he walked back to his couch chair and dropped his body on it.
“And you say you don’t play favorites,” Henrik accusingly narrowed his eyes at Jack who stuck his tongue out at him.
“And I’ll keep saying it no matter how much you guys accuse me of it,” Jack grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
The doctor rolled his eyes before spreading his own blanket over him. He turned over on his side and snubbed Jack with his back, ignoring the ‘Oh real mature, Henrik!’ that Jack shot towards him quietly.
“Goodnight Mister McLoughlin,” Henrik said in the snobbiest tone he could muster.
“Are you seri— Oh whatever, goodnight to you too, Doctor Schneeplestein.” He heard Jack huff and mutter something incomprehensible with his distance under his breath.
Henrik stifled a smile and his chuckle as he felt his creator fake pouting even with his back turned against him.
As he closed his eyes, he was highly aware of the sounds of soft breathing (or snoring in Jackie’s case…) coming from everyone in the room and he thinks that it’s the most beautiful sound he has ever heard his entire life.
He wished that he could stay in this single moment in time for as long as he wanted, to engrave it in his memories for when the nights are cold and when deep regrets are keeping him awake.
0-0-0-0-0
“Testing! Teeeeesting… Alright, the mic and audio seems to be okay,” Chase squinted at his face cam, flicking a finger in front of its lens to get its autofocus clearing up on his face. He brightened up when the camera finally focused just right! “Attaboy! Now we can finally start recording.”
He’s done his vocal warmups before he started setting up everything and even made sure that the house was nice and locked up and made sure that he doesn’t need to go for a pee break for one to two hours. Those moments are always a hassle and awkward for him and Robin to cut out. Not to mention it’s always a bit of a distraction especially when he is finally in the zone for the camera.
He also has his own lil water container filled with delicious fresh water in front of him, out of the camera’s point of view, just so he could freshen up his voice from all the screaming and yelling that he was about to do. While voice cracks are fun to jump from from a comedic point, it’s not nice to be known as the loudest Irish youtuber who still has voice cracks like a teenager going through puberty.
The phone has been muted and set on vibrate, and the games have been pulled up and listed on his desktop ready for recording!
Today’s video recording theme is… those medical surgery related games.
It had been an idea that had been drifting around his mind for a while but he didn’t have the mental and emotional energy to bother with the vivid reminders of his missing older brother. Maybe this was just another way of spiting Anti for what he had done to him a two days ago in his vulnerable state just like how his sudden burst of energy fueled him to prove that he wasn’t completely useless all alone by tidying up his wreck of a room in the middle of the night.
He knew that Anti seems to have it out for Henrik just as personally as he has it out for Jack since any mention of his brother has the demon hissing and spitting rage which he found rather peculiar since he’d have thought that the demon would be using what he’s doing to Henrik as another one of his taunts and considering he probably has the upper hand over the doctor right now. He stopped mentioning Henrik after that one moment when Anti had gone frighteningly still with his eyes glowing bloody murder towards him and then disappeared for a few hours. When he came back, he was covered in blood and Chase wisely didn’t ask him from whom it came from.
Since then, they never talked about it although Anti’s presence would be unbearable whenever he played any medical related game since it always felt like the demon was breathing down his neck (although knowing his luck he probably did but since he didn’t care enough to turn around and see that horrifying sight he’d like to believe that it never happened) just daring him to mention anything about his beloved doctor of a brother. The only time Anti made any comment about Henrik was literally that postcard hack on tumblr. That was a hell of a thing to open the app to.
He could feel the smugness rolling off Anti’s shadowed corner in waves during that day and he had to stop himself from vaulting over the couch to grab the demon who’s been pestering (severe understatement, he knows but still—) him for months and demand what the fuck he’s planning with the postcard.
Anyway, now that Anti wasn’t here (and thank fuck for that) he’s free to record and post this fun little thing for the channel. Honestly, it’s pretty odd to have the past two days of complete silence from Anti but it was also extremely refreshing and absolutely rejuvenating for his spirit. Oh, he didn’t doubt the ‘Always Watching’ threat from his last note but this was the most peaceful and private he’s been for the past months.
Chase adjusted the headset over his ears, checking to make sure that it wasn’t uncomfortable, before he stretched out his arms and body for the long recording session, releasing a satisfied groan at the obscenely loud cracks that his joints made with the stretch.
Okay… Close your eyes…
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
In the next few hours, Chase Brody will not exist. Instead, another man will take his place. How would he react to certain things and events? How would he act out a carefree skit of a parodied impersonation of their resident doctor?
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
Turn the chair around and…
Click
Something snaps into place as his lips stretched itself out into a familiar crooked goofy grin at the sound of his mouse clicking. The metaphorical mask slipping over his face felt so much more natural than when it was taken off at this point in time. He swung his chair around and greeted the invisible audience on the other side of the screen.
“Hello and welcome back! I am Doctor Jacksepticeye,” he both recognizes and doesn’t recognize the face that was looking back at him on the recording screen, “and welcome to my ER!”
It was easy, always so so easy to step into his shoes, to become someone who is dearly beloved by so many people, to become someone who has inspired this community to follow him. Every time he slips this mask on for the screen he always experienced this high knowing that for once he won’t be someone who was miserably alone and useless to his loved ones. If he immersed himself deeper into this mask, he could even believe that the people are seeing him and not Jack but that’s a thought that he’d brush off the moment it lingers at the surface of his mind.
However, while it was highly tempting to keep the mask up even by his lonesome, it always faded away the moment the camera stopped and left him far more drained than before he started recording.
Stop. Don’t think about that now.
Chase does not exist at this very moment.
Only Jack remained with that cheerful smile on his lips.
Finally, he allowed himself to fade into the background and push that persona forward to take his place.
In the next blink, Chase closed his eyes and Jack opened them.
0-0-0-0-0
The deep blue sky stretched over the horizon.
It was much too big. Much too hopeful.
It was too much for him who has been stuck in the darkness with no one but Him for company—
No.
No.
Do not think.
Not yet.
Later. Yes, later. In safety. In his family’s safety and warmth.
The door had been unlocked. Why? Why had it been unlocked?
Then he was running, stumbling about in the abyss like a drunk and suddenly there was light—
It had been too bright, too warm on his cold skin that it felt like it was burning his flesh off like the hot po—
No. Regroup. Stop.
Do. Not. Think. About. It.
He ran and ran and ran amongst the crowd, deaf to the rude words that had been tossed towards his way when he crashed into someone and jumped away as if he had been shocked, deaf to the concerned strangers’ questions before he shoved their wandering hands away.
Don’t touch him. Don’t fucking touch him!
It hurts. His eyes hurt. His ears hurt.
It’s so loud. He missed the blissfully subtle static that always kept him company in his cell—
Stop speaking… Stop speaking! Shut up… Shut up. Shutupshutupshutupshutupshutup—
The colors began to shift around him and they… became familiar? Familiar streets. Familiar names.
There was that sound from the annoying dog barking from a neighbor’s—
Ah.
This must be another one of his games.
The front garden was unkempt. Why was it unkempt? There were no flowers blooming from the bushes that looked as dry and thirsty as he normally felt. His little brother loved—loves his gardening hobby. He loves seeing the smiles of the passersby and his family when they see the colorful flowers he’d carefully tend to every week.
Yes, this was just further proof that this was all an illusion. He wanted to scream. He wanted to tell Him to stop this farce. However, he knows that he must continue the show lest He becomes angry for his disobedience once more.
He walked on. There. The front door was in front of him. Instinctively, he reached into his coat’s pocket (since when had he started wearing this coat?) and of course, of course, the key was there.
The door is opened and he is greeted by a cold, silent hou…
No.
Wait.
He looked up. There was a voice. It was faint but there it is.
Which show was he putting on this time? A replay of that fateful day? Or perhaps it was another one of those games where He makes him pretend that he was finally free?
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
He walked up the stairs.
One.
Two.
Three.
The fourth door.
The Recording Room.
What sort of cruel joke awaits him behind this door he wondered?
He was tired. So so tired… Perhaps if he pretended to be the brave, cool headed doctor that he had been He would grow bored of this show quick.
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
The ice on the doorknob was a welcome sting to his constantly wandering, constantly moving mind. It keeps him still. Keeps him in the moment just like all of the pain—
Take all the shattered pieces of your bravery now, good doctor, and let it all out…
The door was flung open and the familiar—unfamiliar man in the room spun around in his chair and looked up at his heaving, shuddering body with a wide-eyed look. Yes, that face—that impossible face was the face of a comatose man as He often taunted him during their sessions— sat in front of him just told him that this was all just another one of His cruel mind games.
A flash of anger.
A dash of fear.
Then the ridiculous words streamed out of his lips as he pointed a shaking accusing finger angrily, fearfully at the shocked mirage before him.
“I-I am the good doctor,” he started, his voice growing louder to mask the racing, thundering heart attempting to rip itself out of his chest, “and that is my chair!”
“... Henrik?” At that trembling, fragile voice, the mirage shattered and suddenly his baby brother, the one who has always looked up to him like he knew all of the secrets held within this universe… the younger brother who had always, always undervalued his own existence… The baby brother that he so dearly loved was looking up at him, no traces of the impossible man were left behind. “Henrik, is that you?”
And for a second, he allowed his guard to drop, allowing the fragile piece of hope in his chest to wriggle up the surface of his beaten heart.
“Help me,” he begged. His voice was painfully raw and vulnerable as it clawed itself out of his throat.
Then as if he was just a puppet whose cruel puppeteer cut his strings out of nowhere just because he had grown bored of his broken toy, he crumpled forward, all remaining energy in his pathetically weak body dropping to a complete zero, and his legs toppled underneath him. He braced himself to meet the cold unforgiving floor of his cell while his warden cackled at his show of weakness…
But it never came.
Instead, someone caught his body and he was suddenly engulfed in that familiar softness and warmth as two arms gently but firmly wrapped themselves around his bony waist.
“I gotcha… I gotcha big bro. I gotcha,” Henrik closed his eyes and in a fit of broken exhaustion allowed himself to believe in this dream.
“Don’t let this be a dream,” he whimpered. “Don’t… Don’t let me wake up—”
“Shh… It’s not a dream. You’re home. You’ve come home. I promise,” he shuddered at that almost comforting voice and the hand that was stroking the back of his head tenderly. “I’ll still be here when you wake up. I promise.”
Chapped lips were brushed over his forehead and he slipped away into the familiar abyss.
Oh how the good doctor dearly wished that he could remain in this single moment of time rather than face the cruel reality of what was waiting for him the next time he opened his eyes.
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Anything Quinn Hughes!!
i wrote half of this in a 2 am stupor and then reread it in the middle of the day when i wasn’t sleep deprived and decided to rewrite so here ya go lol, love my quinny boy.
48. we don’t like each other but we’re at a mutual friends christmas party and keep getting caught under the mistletoe together
“I always thought the whole mistletoe thing was so cliche.” I rolled my eyes at the group, who had settled down after dinner and somehow ended up on the overemphasized holiday garnish.
“I think it’s kinda cute.” Emma clasped her hands together, “I don’t know, kind of gives you an excuse... or a push, to show someone you love them.”
“You don’t need a plant to show someone you love them or have a reason to kiss them.” Elias started.
“Thanks Petey.” I nodded in approval.
Jake butted in, “How do you not like mistletoe?”
“I don’t know, it just feels like a ruse.” I bite sarcastically and Brock snorts out a sardonic laugh as if to mock me. I glared at him jokingly.
“Mistletoe is just supposed to add to the merriment of the season! Don’t be such a Scrooge (Y/N/N)!”
“I’m not a Scrooge! I love Christmas just not mistletoe.”
“You just don’t like it because you’ve never been kissed under it.” Jake laughed. And Brock just raised his brows as if this was news to him. It wasn’t.
“Hey now, no need to throw jabs.” I chuckle. His teasing didn’t bother me in the slightest. I did however, take a quick glance at Quinn, who was only listening intently with a neutral expression, and then my eyes flickered to the greenery hanging in the doorway to the living room. Emma wasn’t joking. I swore I saw the damned thing everywhere in this house. I was being extra careful to make it out without getting caught underneath. Especially with him.
I didn’t know what it was about Quinn that just rubbed me the wrong way but maybe we could start with how it seemed he didn't care about even trying to make me feel included or part of the friend group whenever he was around. And every time I tried to make an effort with him I was ignored. Brock was my best friend. I was always around. You would think that Quinn could at least try to meet me halfway? It didn’t help that I harboured a teensy crush on him when we first met. But that all dissipated into awkward silences and trying anyway to escape the others company, just for the fact that it was sheerly uncomfortable. I didn’t want to embarrass myself anymore than I had already in making an effort.
It was upsetting. Brock told me about him and from what I could tell it seemed like we would be great friends. It didn’t matter though, we were okay with being acquaintances at best. At least- I think I was. It didn’t matter that we didn’t talk or even like each other, whenever I saw him my stupid heart would flutter.
After our mistletoe debate, Brock got up to take his plate to the dishwasher and most of us followed. I was tucked in the far corner of the dining room, and I wanted to be last out so I could clear the doorway with ease.
Everyone had already made their way into the living room as I tried to quickly step through the doorway but Quinn tried to brush past me back into the dining room at the same time and it just didn’t work. He almost knocked the plate out of my hand, but a steady arm reached out to balance my teetering body. I looked up at him and tried to say something, but his hazel eyes looked different now, softer almost, than I had ever seen them. And for a split second I thought I may get lost in them, but then I realized we were under the mistletoe. By the time I looked back at him he had disappeared through the other side of the door and I was left with a dirty dish and the ghost of his hand on my hip.
Confusion swirled around my brain. Was I thinking about- kissing him? No. Things with Quinn would stick to the status quo, no matter how badly I wished things were different between us, they weren’t. I needed to get that through my thick skull.
I brought my plate into the kitchen to see Brock slaving over the dishes. “Dish duty huh?” I handed him my plate but then started loading the ones he rinsed off into the empty dishwasher.
He smiled, graciously accepting my tag team, “I offered.”
“Of course you did.” I grinned at my best friend's kindness, “-so well mannered.”
“Hey-“ he said, pointing a fork at me, “my mother raised me right!”
I saw Quinn pass through the doorway into the living room and my eyes trailed after him, but quickly glanced back to Brock. Apparently I wasn’t as slick as I thought.
Brock nodded his head in that general direction, “What's up with you two?” He had a hint of mirth in his tone as he finished rinsing the last dish off and handed it to me. I put it in the washer and hopped on the counter after I started it. “I dunno, He always ignores me? I guess I feel like I did something wrong to make him not like me. Ya know?”
“(Y/N),” Brock looked at me as if he knew something I didn’t and leaned against the counter, “trust me, you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Well then why doesn’t he talk to me? I’ve tried so many times and it never sticks. He looks like he’s bored of me the minute I enter a room.” I frown and cross my arms. It was a little frustrating.
“I think he’s a little shy around you that’s all.” Brock smiles.
“If he was just ‘shy’ I think he would’ve come around by now.” I joke, but still, “it’s been, what, 5 months since I met the guy? I think he’s said two words to me the entire time.”
“Are you mad about it?” My best friend grinned, “cause you sound like you’re mad about it.” He was more than smirking at this point but I knew he saw through me. He may be a little shit but I knew he wouldn’t tell my secrets to the the team. So I’m honest. “A little! It bothers me that he doesn’t talk to me, I can usually make conversation with anybody! But noooo not Quinn! He has to be all quiet and mysterious and chill and he probably doesn’t even like me!” I was making assumptions, but that’s all I had to go on.
Brock laughs, and I shove him a little bit. “So what I’m hearing is, that crush you had before, never really went away.”
I shook my head. I hated how he had me pegged. “Don’t worry about it (Y/N/N),” he patted me on the shoulder, “I’m sure he’ll come around.” He smirked and headed for the living room and all I could do was follow.
I swung my legs down over the counter and went into Stech’s living room. Everyone was piled onto the couch to watch a Christmas movie. But the only seat left was on the end. Next to Quinn. I awkwardly walked over and quietly asked if I could sit next to him. He only nodded. We were watching The Grinch and I could hear his mumbling as I sat down next to him “how fitting.”
“Is it because of the mistletoe thing?” I whispered as I tried to get comfortable but there was quite literally no room. I finally gave up and when I looked at him, his eyes were wide.
“What?” his voice was low and there was a deep line furrowing his forehead.
“Are you calling me a grinch because I said I didn’t get the point of it?” I wasn’t mad per sei, this was the most he had ever talked to me, and I was going to pick his brain. I had no choice but to lean against him all squished on the couch and his body was stiff as a board.
“Oh.” a little tension released, “No, I mean, I don’t get why you don’t get it, but then again, I don’t get a lot of things about you.” It was meant to be an insult I’m sure, but his voice went soft and curious, and I wasn’t looking at him, but I could tell he was looking at me for some sort of answer. I felt like maybe whispering these things in a room full of people watching The Grinch maybe wasn’t the best time to give answers, but maybe it was my only shot to figure him out.
At least the volume on the movie was all the way up.
“Like what?”
He leaned over to make sure I was the only one who could hear, but his thigh pressed into mine more and it felt like my whole body was on fire from the proximity, “I don’t get how you’re always so cheerful. People don’t bring you down. You always stay positive no matter what you go through, no matter how the team plays, any situation always has a bright side with you.”
I could feel my cheeks heat up at that. “Doesn’t always feel that way.” I mumbled. “I didn’t know you noticed.” I thought he never noticed me as a person, even something as minimal as my attitude.
It was his turn for his cheeks to go red and he quickly muttered, “I don’t get how you don’t get mistletoe.”
I grinned, “I think it’s annoying. Just an excuse for pda.” He looked taken aback, “I didn’t know you were such a big fan of mistletoe.” I teased, nudging him for extra measure, and as I glanced back I could see the edge of his mouth curve upwards just a little. And I’m sure the beating of my heart intensified. Just a smidge. Maybe enough for him to hear.
I needed a break before I said something I would regret and screw up the progress we’ve made. I got up from my spot and headed to the bathroom. And on my way back I bumped into someone for the second time tonight and it startled me, “Brock, I swear if you’re trying to scare me-“ but when I looked up it was Quinn again. His brows were furrowed and he looked like he had something on the tip of his tongue.
I was a little confused, “Are you okay?”
He looked up and I followed his gaze to a different looking mistletoe hanging above us for the second time tonight.
“I Uh-“ he shook his head, “no umm.”
I was hesitant, “are you su-“ and in a second his lips were covering mine and I didn’t know I needed them so much till now, but I do. I really do.
He pulled me in closer and we leaned against the wall in the hallway. I could feel him smiling as his lips hungrily glazed over mine and after a moment he pulled back with a big grin spreading across his face. I was smiling too. “I don’t think I hate the mistletoe anymore.” I joked, pulling him in again, tasting peppermint on his lips and sinking in to the feeling of his body pressing against mine.
I allowed myself to forget about the fact that this was way out of left field and I didn’t really even know why he kissed me. “Wait.” I pulled back again, placing a firm hand on his chest. I glanced down to his pink lips that already seemed to be a little swollen from tracing over mine. As much as I liked the sight, I was a little confused. “I thought you didn’t like me?”
Quinn furrowed a brow at that. “Why did you think that?”
I laughed at that. I really did. “You never talk to me! You always disappear when I come around! I swear the first time I met you, you shook my hand and I never heard a word from you again.”
Quinn toyed with my hand, swinging our joint fingers back and forth between us. He spoke quietly, but with such clarity it was astounding, “I was nervous around you. I’m not the best at talking about, anything really, especially feelings. I didn’t know how to talk to you so I figured if it was best that I just… didn’t, but, I wish I had done things a little differently.” He shrugged, gaze not leaving the ground. “I guess what I’m trying to say is I like you, (Y/N). And I would really like to get to know you, instead of ignoring you.” He half smiled and flicked his eyes back up to me.
My breath caught in my throat for a second. I still couldn’t believe what he was saying, “you-“ I pointed, “you like me?”My brows furrowed and he nodded. But I only shook my head in disbelief. Before I could say anything else he pulled me flush against him again. He ducked his head down and kissed me softly, as if he was savoring the taste of my lips and pulled back way too soon. I couldn’t get enough.
“How many times do I have to show you?” He chuckled but the way his lips curved up was genuine. He meant it. I could see it in his eyes. He liked me.
“A million.” And he peppered light kisses all around my lips and cheeks and nose and forehead until I was giggling.
I heard a voice and I turned to see Brock peeking down the hall at us with just a knowing look. “Go away Boeser!” I laughed and he just had a stupid grin plastered on his face as he disappeared back into the living room.
“Go on a date with me?” Quinn asked nervously.
I turned back to him, “okay.” I said softly.
“You still think it’s just for pda?” He motioned to the mistletoe hanging above us.
And I shrugged and he pulled me back to him, “yeah.”
He smiled, still leaning down till he was level with me, “only fair.”
#winter prompts#quinn hughes#huggy bear!#vancouver canucks#im kinda really into brock as your bestie here
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Blue - Colby Brock x Reader - Part 1/3
I just want to start this out by saying that there’s mention of a past shitty relationship in this. Nothing is described in detail and it’s not crazy, but I figured I’d mention it just in case someone didn’t want to read this one. Also, I know that Colby’s apartment is the single bedroom version, but I wrote it more like Sam’s apartment. 2 bedrooms. Other than that, enjoy.
-----------------------------------------
“Yo, Mike!” Colby called, walking into Sam’s apartment. The weekly pizza party was well underway, as Colby searched through half empty boxes for a slice of pizza that didn’t have any vegetables on it.
“What’s up?” Mike called back, over the noise of the multiple conversations all happening at once in the living room.
“Dude, do you remember that artist I sent you a few months back? The girl that does super chill covers of like og emo songs?” Colby asked him, walking towards the couch.
“Yeah, yeah. You sent me the Taking Back Sunday cover, right?” Mike answered.
“Brother! She just covered one of your songs.” Colby said, tossing Mike his phone.
“No fucking way.” Mike said, putting the phone speaker close to his ear trying to hear it. “It’s too fucking loud in here”, he grumbled, hopping over the back of the couch and walking into Sam’s filming room.
Colby followed, closing the door behind him. “Start it over! I haven’t listened to it yet.”
Mike turned the volume all the way up and set the phone down in front of the both of them. The piano started a few seconds before the lyrics to “Bottles” beautifully flowed from her mouth.
“This is unreal.” Mike said, pointing to his arm. “I have goosebumps, dude.”
“Her voice gets me every time.” Colby added, shoving his pizza into his mouth.
Suddenly the filming room door swung open, Sam walking in. “Please don’t tell me you’re trying to stay here overnight again.” Sam whined, laughing.
“SSSSSHHHHHHHHHH” was the response he got, both Mike and Colby urging him to shut up.
“Jeez.” Sam threw his hands up in defense, walking over to see what they were doing. “Whoa, is this y/n?” Sam asked Colby.
“Covering my song.” Mike said, continuing to stare at the screen.
Slowly a few curious others in the group made their way into the small room. “Who was that?” Kat asked, having heard the last half of the song.
Colby turned around, seeing everyone standing behind him. “Holy shit!” he jumped, laughing. “I didn’t know anyone else was in here.”
“Her name is Y/n. She’s this cover artist that Colby has been listening to for like 3 years. She posts her own songs too, but she’s known for doing covers of songs that aren’t really ‘pretty’ songs and turning them into…well what you just heard.” Sam explained.
“She’s got a beautiful voice.” Kat replied, leaning down to look at the phone. “The video has over 200k views, too. That’s good exposure for you, Mike.”
“No way.” Colby grabbed his phone. “I got the video notification less than an hour ago.”
“This is nuts.” Mike said, grabbing his own phone.
Looking underneath the video title, Colby read the description to himself. “Dude, dude, dude. Listen to this.” he said, reading the description out loud. “Hey everyone! Today’s cover means a lot to me. For those of you that follow my blog, you know that I’ve been struggling to feel motivated to continue posting videos. Lately it feels like so many artists just want to drag other artists. There’s a lot of negativity and judgement and honestly, it just feels shallow and fake.”
“Preach, girl.” Kat half mumbled.
Colby laughed, continuing. “Over the last month or so, I’ve been fortunate enough to have found quite a few new artists that have inspired me to continue pushing the genre boundaries. Mike’s Dead is one of those artists.” Colby paused to slap Mike on the shoulder before continuing. “He posts what he wants to post and it’s so refreshing to see someone that doesn’t really care if you like it or not. It doesn’t matter if you fit in a cookie cutter mold. It doesn’t matter if you like sad songs or gospel songs or rap songs. It doesn’t matter if you wear short skirts or baggy t shirts or too much eye liner. If you want to create, create. The world needs more people creating and less people tearing others down. Thank you, Mike. You’ll probably never see this, but if you do, I hope you enjoy it. -Love, Y/n. #DeadArmy”
“Damn, son.” Kevin yelled, “My boy out here reachin’ people!” He threw his arms around Mike, jumping up and down.
“I don’t even know what to do.” Mike said, falling back on the couch. “Do I dm her? Do I tweet out the cover? Do I ask her to marry me?” he laughed.
“Damnit, you’re taller than me AND you make music. There go my chances with her.” Colby laughed.
“I’m gonna tweet this out. Do you know her twitter handle?” Mike asked.
“Yeah, yeah. Right here.” Colby pointed to her social media list in her description.
“How does this sound?” Mike said, reading his tweet. “I’m speechless. @ColbyBrock just showed me the most breathtaking cover of one of my songs posted by @y/n. I literally have no words. *link* Everyone go show this girl all the love!”
“Go for it, dude. I’ll retweet it.” Colby replied. Everyone else in the room grabbed their phones to do the same. Colby hit the retweet button, adding his own message. “I’ve been listening to this girl for a few years now and it’s CRAZY to see her cover one of my friend’s songs. She has the most beautiful voice I’ve ever heard. Everybody check the video out and fill the comment section with love!”
Everybody made sure to follow her twitter and sub to her channel.
Mike scrolled through the responses he got to his tweet. “Someone just replied asking if this was why my subscribers went up so quickly.”
“Check your live count.” Sam said, writing out his own retweet. “Living with @ColbyBrock I’ve definitely heard all of this girl’s covers at least a hundred times. You are going to be blown away by what she did with Mike’s song. Go listen!”
“Holy shit, my subs have doubled.” Mike said, throwing his phone to Colby. “I don’t know what’s going on. Someone tell me we have alcohol in this apartment.”
“Next door, brother. My place, above the dishwasher. Grab whatever.” Colby replied, watching Mike’s live sub count continue to grow.
The next morning, Colby woke up to a follow notification and a dm from y/n. “Hey! Omg! Thank you so much for passing my cover on to Mike. And thank you for saying such kind things. I woke up to THOUSANDS of comments from your fans and all of them were lovely.”
“Holy shit”, Colby swore, sitting up in his bed. He looked through his notifications and saw a few texts from Mike, as well, from over an hour ago.
Mike – Dude
Mike – Brother
Mike – She messaged me
Mike – I asked her if she would ever be interested in recording together
Colby – She dm’d me too. I just woke up so I haven’t messaged her back yet. Did she answer you???
Colby started writing out his response to y/n. “You are so welcome! We were both blown away by the cover. You did an amazing job. I’m trying so hard not to fanboy right now, haha. I’m happy to hear that the Sam and Colby fans have been kind to you. I’d like to think we have the best fans ever.”
He quickly saw the little typing bubble pup up. “Haha, you don’t seem like the type to fanboy. And yes, I didn’t see a single mean comment.”
*incoming call – Dead Boy*
Colby picked up the phone “Miiiiiiiike!”
Mike laughed, “Holy shit. I just got off of FaceTime with Y/n.”
“WHAT?!” Colby’s voice cracked.
“Dude, she’s so cool. She seems totally down to come to LA.” Mike laughed at Colby’s reaction.
“This is crazy.” Colby said, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “When is she going to visit?”
“She said she just needs to figure out where to stay.” Mike explained. “She wants to come down for like a month so we can write and she can work with a few other people. She talked to Kat too!”
“Did you tell her she could easily stay with one of us? We’ve got a few open rooms between our little group.” Colby asked.
“Of course, but she kept saying she couldn’t impose on us like that.” Mike replied. “I told her she wouldn’t be, but she insisted.”
“She wouldn’t be at all!” Colby agreed. “Dude, we have friends crash with us all the time!”
“I know, I know. I didn’t want to push it, though. Maybe she is just uncomfortable not having her own space.” Mike suggested.
“Maybe”, Colby replied. “Well keep me in the loop, man. This still seems so crazy.” He laughed.
“Of course, dude. I’ll catch you later.”
After saying their goodbyes, Colby reopened Y/n’s dm and started typing. “Believe me, Y/n, I have my fanboy moments, haha.”
He added another message before she could reply. “I just got off the phone with Mike! I’m stoked to hear you’re going to try to visit! I just wanted to make sure you know that you’re more than welcome to stay with one of us. I’ve got a whole spare bedroom set up and so does Kat. And there’s always room at Mike’s place, too. I totally get it if you’re just not comfortable because you don’t know us, but I wanted to let you know you wouldn’t be imposing on anyone. Promise.”
“Maybe I’ll get to witness one of these ‘fanboy’ moments myself, Brock.” Y/n replied. “And omg no! It’s not that I don’t trust you guys. Honestly, I’m excited to meet your whole group of friends. You guys seem so chill. I just won’t be traveling alone.”
Colby cocked his head a bit reading the last dm. “Oooh, are you visiting with your boyfriend or something?” He replied, mumbling “figures” to himself.
“LOL, that’s a big no.” she quickly replied.
“Thank god.” Colby said out loud, seeing the typing bubble pop back up.
“I have never posted this online, but I have a 2 and a half year-old daughter. Her dad will never be in our lives again for multiple reasons.” She wrote. “I couldn’t ask anyone to host both of us for that long. Being a single parent is work and I don’t want to interrupt someone else’s life that drastically.”
Colby’s eyes widened. “Whooaaa”, he said out loud, re-reading her last dm. After thinking about it for a few minutes, he still couldn’t really come up with any reasons why they couldn’t stay with him. He actually likes kids and kids tend to like him. “Damn, praise to you for doing it alone. I can’t imagine how much work it takes.” Colby typed back.
“Thanks, lol. It’s definitely work, but once you actually become a parent it’s just…worth it. Her name is Ivy and she’s my everything.” Y/n typed back.
Taking a deep breath, Colby started typing. “First, what a cute name. Second, at the risk of me sounding pushy, I’m going to offer you my spare bedroom again. I swear on my YouTube channel you won’t be imposing at all. I have this place to myself and I love kids. There could be toys and other kid stuff strewn all over the apartment and I promise, it’d be fine. You don’t have to decide now, but just think about it okay?”
Colby didn’t get a message back for a solid 5 minutes and he started to worry that he had overstepped. He let out a huge sigh of relief when he finally got her reply. “The kindness and hospitality you guys have already shown me has blown me away. I promise I’ll consider it. And thank you for going out of your way to make me feel welcome. I am very much looking forward to meeting you. <3”
“I’m glad to hear it. And ditto. I can’t wait to finally meet you. Honestly, y/n, your music is my go-to when I need to get out of my own head.” He replied. “I have to go shower and get ready to film a video. Let me know what you decide!”
“Will do, Brock. <3.”
Over the next few weeks plans were made, friendships grew, late night talks were had….and finally, the day everyone had been waiting for was just around the corner.
“Okay, I’m in. As long as you’re sure you’re okay living with my crazy little girl for a while, I’ll start my road trip to LA this weekend.” Y/n said into the phone, watching her daughter eat an apple pancake while watching one of her favorite movies.
“Yessss” she heard Colby cheer into phone. “Have you talked to Mike and Kat yet?”
“Yeah, they know I’m heading down soon.” She replied. “Honestly, this couldn’t have come at a better time. I need a new adventure and I think we could both use some California sunshine.”
“Well, California is waiting for you. I know you’re driving here so you can bring whatever you need for Ivy but let me know if you need me to pick anything up.” He told her. “I made you a set of keys, I’ve removed anything dangerous from the bottom half of my apartment, I got those little clear plug things to make sure the outlets are safe, there’s a baby gate on the stairs….” Colby started rambling. He had been doing everything he could to baby proof his place.
“Colby!” Y/n laughed, interrupting his run-on sentence. “You are too good to me. I promise your place is fine as-is. Ivy has grown up around all of my recording equipment and she’s never once gotten hurt. If there’s anything I’m worried about, I promise I’ll tell you.”
“Sorry.” Colby laughed. “I think I’m just excited to meet both of you.”
Ivy squealed, laughing at her favorite part in the movie. “Well we’re both excited to meet you, too.”
Colby, Sam, Kat and Mike were all hanging out in Colby’s apartment, waiting for Y/n to arrive. Colby had just gotten a text from her saying she was getting off of the freeway.
“She’s only like 5 minutes away so I’m going to meet her down where I told her to park.” Colby said, slipping on his Vans.
“We probably shouldn’t all meet her down there, right?” Sam asked. “If I rolled up to a new place and a mob of people greeted me at my car door, I may not want to get out”, he laughed.
“She also doesn’t know we’re here.” Mike chuckled.
“I’ll go down alone and then I can text you guys to come down and help bring her stuff up. Does that work?” Colby asked, headed to his door.
“Sounds like a plan.” Kat replied. When Colby left the apartment, she turned to the two other boys. “He seem off to either of you?”
“He’s nervous.” Sam smiled, knowing Colby better than anyone else on the planet.
“He hasn’t talked about anything but y/n since she posted that cover.” Mike added. “I thought I was hella excited about this, but meeting her is a whole other thing to him.”
“Her music means a lot to him.” Sam explained. “Yeah, her covers are what she’s known for, but he loves her original stuff. When we lived together, I could always tell when Colby was anxious because I’d hear her music coming from his room.”
“Aww, that’s actually super sweet.” Kat gushed.
Downstairs, Colby was watching the gate. He knew she drove a black SUV and that she would pull in any minute. Finally spotting her, he waved her in and pointed towards the spot where she could park.
Climbing out of the driver’s seat, Y/n opened the back driver’s side door to check on Ivy. “Colby?” she called, peeking around the back.
“I’m here!” he laughed, walking towards Y/n with his arms open. “I’m glad you guys made it safe.” He said, pulling her into a long-awaited hug.
“Same.” She replied, wrapping her arms around him. “California drivers are crazy.” She chuckled.
“That is a fact.” He replied, looking into the car to see Ivy asleep in her car-seat. “She is freaken adorable.”
“Thanks.” Y/n smiled up at him. “She just fell asleep, too. I’m going to try not to wake her up.”
“Mike, Kat, and Sam are upstairs. I’ll text them to come down and help grab stuff. We can probably make it in one trip.” Colby said, texting Sam and telling them to head down. He sent another message saying that Ivy was asleep and that they shouldn’t yell.
“Oh, my god. I get to meet so many of you right away.” y/n said, unbuckling Ivy.
“We’re all a little excited.” Colby laughed. “Where is her playpen so I can grab that first. Then she’ll have a place to nap.”
“It’s that red thing right there”, she pointed, pulling Ivy to rest against her chest.
“Is it easy to set up or should I hold the little one while you use mom witchery to put it together?” Colby said, laughing.
“Actually, you may be on to something there. If you’re sure you’re okay holding Ivy, I’ll hand you her and her bag and I’ll grab the important stuff out of the back.” Y/n answered, turning so It would be easier to pass off Ivy.
“Of course I’m okay holding her.” Colby said, rubbing her back before moving her from Y/n’s chest to his. He gently swayed, hoping to keep her asleep.
The rest of the group walked out of the elevator and straight towards the SUV. “Awwww, Sam. Look at him holding the little girl.” Kat quietly spoke to her boyfriend.
“Yeah, I can’t lie. That shit is cute as fuck.” Mike giggled, looking at Sam and Kat.
Y/n turned towards the laughter and saw the group. She let out a quiet squeal and ran towards them. “This feels unreal.” She said, hugging them each. “I feel like I’ve talked to you guys nonstop for weeks and now I’m here and it’s just…Oh, my god.”
“Well we are so happy you made the trip.” Kat said, pulling her into another hug.
Colby walked towards them, cradling Ivy against his chest. “I’m going to head up with her if that’s okay, y/n?” He was rubbing soothing circles into Ivy’s back. “A car honked and startled her awake, but I think I got her to fall back asleep.”
“Aww, you’re a natural.” y/n smiled at him, leaning in to press a kiss to her daughter’s temple. “I’ll let them know what else needs to be brought up and we’ll meet you up there in a minute.”
Colby walked towards the elevators and the rest of them walked towards the SUV.
“There’s not too much other than the bags to bring up. I decided it was easier to buy a few things new than to try to break them down, pack them, and rebuild them.” Y/n said, grabbing things out of the back.
“I don’t blame you.” Kat replied, grabbing one of the bags. “I’ll go with you to pick up what you need from the store.”
“Thank you! That’s perfect. I’m going to need to pick up coffee on the way, too.” Y/n said, walking back to the front of the car and grabbing her handbag.
“There’s a coffee shop on every corner, here. Caffeine is a way of life.” Sam said, making sure they had grabbed everything y/n needed out of the car.
“There’s actually a huge baby/kids store like 2 miles up the road.” Mike added, closing the hatch to the SUV. When he turned around, everyone was staring at him wondering why he knew that. “Oh. Yeah. I pranked Aryia while he was on keto by replacing everything in our fridge with baby food”, he laughed.
“That makes a lot more sense.” Sam nodded.
When the group finally made it up to Colby’s apartment, Sam led the way in. They tried to stay as quiet as possible. “Colby?” Y/n whispered, looking to ask where the best place to set up the playpen was.
“His spare room is this way.” Kat led the line of people carrying bags. “Lets just put all of your stuff in here and you can sort it when you aren’t afraid to make noise.”
The boys set the bags they were carrying by the closet and left to find Colby. When Kat and Y/n walked out of the spare room, they saw Sam and Mike both taking pictures of something on the couch.
“Tell me that isn’t the cutest thing you’ve ever seen in your life.” Mike turned to the girls, showing them one of the pictures.
Colby had taken Ivy upstairs and laid down on the couch, hoping to keep the little girl asleep while they waited for y/n. Ivy was laying on his chest, one of his hands resting on her back, and Colby had fallen asleep. The two of them peacefully napping, tucked into the corner of the couch.
“Send me that one.” Y/n said, smiling down at the scene in front of her. “I was going to write a blog post about her and this trip at some point tonight and that picture is perfect for it.”
“He didn’t sleep at all last night, so I’m not surprised he fell asleep.” Sam chuckled.
“Well, I vote we leave the boys here and we make that run to the store.” Kat said, linking arms with Y/n.
“I don’t want to leave you guys to take care of her, though.” Y/n said, explaining her worry. “If she wakes up and gets fussy or something, I don’t want you guys to have to deal with that.”
“Y/n, she’s going to be fine. I’ve snuggled against that chest. It’s hella comfortable. She isn’t going to wake up.” Mike joked.
Sam laughed, “Also, we’ve all babysat before. I’ve passed diaper duty training AND I’m a whiz with snacks.”
“We’ll be 5 minutes away, max.” Kat added.
“This is all too easy. You guys are too nice.” Y/n felt her eyes water a bit. “I am not used to anyone caring this much.” She tried to wipe the tears away before they fell.
“Well get used to it.” Kat said, wrapping her arms around y/n. “Our group of friends has kind of adopted you guys at this point and you haven’t even met everyone.”
“Seriously.” Mike said, standing up and pulling y/n into a hug. “We’re all happy to have you guys here.”
The shopping trip was a success and the girls were headed back to the apartment. Colby woke up to the feeling of something in his hair. Ivy was snuggled between Colby and the back of the couch, her tiny fingers running through his blue hair. Colby looked over at the other couch to see Sam asleep and Mike holding his phone out, recording him.
Colby turned his head to look at Ivy and her fingers stopped moving for a second. She looked at his hair and mumbled out the word “blue.”
Colby couldn’t help but chuckle. “You are correct. And so so cute”, he smiled at the little girl.
She then took her pointer finger and ever so gently, put it under one of Colby’s eyes. She smiled and squealed out a higher pitched “blue!”
“I see a reoccurring theme here, kiddo.” He laughed, turning his head when he heard the door open.
“It’s official. I caught the cutest thing in the world on camera.” Mike yelled, waking up Sam. He sent Y/n the video in a text. “How do you not constantly record her?”
“Oh, god. She’s going to leave California with her own YouTube channel, isn’t she?” Y/n laughed, her and Kat taking the purchases to the spare bedroom.
With the 5 adults MOSTLY helping, the spare room and the few things spread around the apartment came together fairly quickly. As the evening was winding down, plans were made for the following days. A trip to the slap house, A lunch with Kat so that she could meet the rest of the girls, and of course…where this whole journey started. Pizza night. Everyone wanted y/n to get settled before they locked themselves in creative mode and started writing and working on music.
Sam and Kat headed off to Sam’s apartment and after Mike finished making plans with y/n, he headed off as well.
Colby and Ivy were both sprawled out on the couch watching a movie while Y/n unpacked all of their clothes into the spare bedroom closet. He looked over at Ivy, laughing when he saw her yawn for the hundredth time. “You sleepy, kiddo?” Ivy shook her head no, her eyes going back to the Tv. Big Hero 6 playing for the third time since she had woken up from her nap. Hearing a knock on his door, Colby yelled for whoever it was to come in.
“Everyone already leave?” Jake asked, Tara following him into the apartment.
“You just missed Mike. Sam and Kat left a while ago.” Colby replied.
Jake saw Ivy peek over the arm of couch at him and Tara. “Well aren’t you the cutest thing in the world”, he said, walking towards the living room.
Ivy giggled and climbed over Colby, hiding between him and the back of the couch. “I don’t know how she’s still awake.” Colby laughed, slipping his arms around the squirmy little girl. “Ivy this is Jake and Tara.”
Ivy waved, saying a little “hi” before her attention fell back on the television screen, her head falling against Colby’s chest.
“Y/n’s just unpacking stuff in there.” Colby pointed towards the spare bedroom.
Tara grabbed Jake’s hand, pulling him to follow her into the open door of the spare room. After introductions, Tara stayed to help with the unpacking and Jake went back out to chill with Colby and Ivy.
“How’s it going so far?” Jake quietly asked, sitting on the coffee table facing Colby.
“Terrifyingly easy.” Colby answered, looking down and finding Ivy fast asleep.
“Well that’s a good thing, right?”, Jake said. “Y/n seems to fit right in. Her and Tara are bonding over SpongeBob memes as we speak.”
“That’s the terrifying part.” Colby said, gently brushing Ivy’s hair out of her face. “They’re here for a month. They’ve only been here for like 7 hours and I’m already sad that they’re going to leave.”
Jake watched Colby gazing down at the tiny sleeping figure in his arms. “I don’t know, brother. You’re usually a loner that likes his space. You might be happy when you’ve got your apartment back”, Jake laughed.
Colby just sighed. *what the fuck am I getting myself into?* he thought to himself....................
part 2
part 3
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50 questions
i was tagged by: @bobohtuzzo
1. What is the color of your hairbrush?: like lime green
2. Name a food you never eat?: LOTS of things. I am very picky. tomatoes,
3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?: always cold
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?: taking my last final of the semester!
5. What is your favorite candy bar?: i don’t really like chocolate? I eat kitkats sometimes
6. Have you ever been to a professional sports event?: so many
7. What is the last thing you said out loud?: something to my mom about being done with finals
8. What is your favorite ice cream?: vanilla with cookie dough!
9. What was the last thing you had to drink?: Water
10. Do you like your wallet?: yes! got a new one earlier this year
11. What was the last thing you ate?: some cheese and crackers as “lunch” at like 4:30
12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? no?
13. The last sporting event you watched?: Blues game on tv
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?: butter!
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to?: gc with my friends
16. Ever go camping?: no
17. Do you take vitamins?: yes
18. Do you go to church every Sunday?: no
19. Do you have a tan?: not currently but I need to get one
20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?: pizza all the way
21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?: not usually
22. What color socks do you usually wear?: I used to have a bunch of fun colored socks but they all got holes, so just normal running socks now (though some of them are still neon colors)
23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit?: at least five over at all times
24. What terrifies you?: lots of things. being alone, mostly.
25. Look to your left, what do you see?: our printer
26. What chore do you hate?: emptying the dishwasher
27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?: that TV show with the mermaids, H20
28. What’s your favorite soda?: pepsi
29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thrus?: drive thrus used to scare me (and my anxiety) so until recently I always went in
30. Who’s the last person you talked to?: my mom
31. Favorite cut of beef?: I don’t really think about that?
32. Last song you listened to?: Need You Now by Lady Antebellum
33. Last book you read?: uhhhh
34. Favorite day of the week?: Saturday
35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?: lol nope
36. How do you like your coffee?: I don’t
37. Favorite pair of shoes?: my maroon converse or the heels I got for my cousin’s wedding
38. The time you normally go to sleep?: around 1 or 1:30 lately
39. The time you normally get up?: after 10:30 almost always
40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets?: sunsets
41. How many blankets on your bed?: 1 to lay under, 1 to cuddle
42. Describe your kitchen plates: we have plain plates at our house lol
43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?: I’m underage I’ll try any type of spiked seltzer pretty much
44. Do you play cards?: spoons at summer camp gets real competitive
45. What color is your car?: white
46. Can you change a tire?: no
47. Your favorite province?: y’all I’m American. I vaguely know the provinces but I’ve never been
48. Favorite job you’ve ever had?: I’ve only had one and it wasn’t the best so
49. How did you get your biggest scar?: neither is very big but I have two little ones on my hip from surgery a couple years ago
50. What did you do today that made someone else happy?: nothing I don’t think? I will probably send Nathan a picture or video of Bailey later though?
idk do it if you want
also @bet-it-was-the-nargles because I like dragging you into these
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