#it’s ok i can tell you didn’t read my blog based on this ask!

[istorkyou]

The Price Of Love (Modern!Ivar AU)

A Modern!Ivar x F Reader

Warnings - STRICTLY 18+ NSFW Language

Synopsis - Money isn’t everything.

Note - This is the second fic I ever wrote and I’m not sure why I never posted it. I think I started writing The Arrangement not long after and kind of fell out of love with this one. Still, it’s been festering in my completed docs for well over a year so I figure I might as well post it 😬 It’s fluffy, and maybe a little cheesy (and by a little I mean a lot!) so if that’s your bag I hope you enjoy it!

Moodboard - The beautiful moodboard is made the magical, amazing @serasvictoria. Thank you so much xxxx

This was beta read by my aussie wife who has left Tumblr. All love, all the time Lou x

Tag List - Let me know if you want on or off :)@smears-and-spots @punkrocknpearls​​ @youbloodymadgenius​​ @momowhoo​​ @zuxiezendler​​ @not-another-viking-fanfic-blog​ @ivar-s-my-brat-tamer​ @pieces-by-me​ @heavenly1927​​ @berryonasummerevening @synnersaint​​ @out-of-the-box-and-into-alchemy​ @petite-hime​​ @serasvictoria​​ @mimiiinspace​​ @itsmysticalmystery​​ @lonewolf471​​ @mylifeisactuallyamess​​ @draculasbride-blog​​ @love-all-things-writing​​ @southernbe​​ @redhead7799​​ @kaybee87​​ @ivarlover​​ @ivarhoegh​​ @idgafiamallthefandoms​​ @darkphoenix5037​​ @profoundtyrantharmony​​ @snarling-through-our-smiles​​ @crazyunsexycool​​ @xceafh​​ @bragisrunes​​@noway4u @batmandallyboy​​ @complicatedbutrare @readsalot73​​​​ @meandmycherrytree @wonton-wrappers​ 

Masterpost

CHAPTER 6

At exactly 3pm your bell goes. A smile is on your face and an excited flutter in your stomach is present as you open the door to him. You have never seen him look so fucking sexy. He is in grey sweatpants and a black hoodie, his hair isn’t as perfect as usual either. You have only seen him in super formal dress, shirts, ties and trousers. This casual look is really doing it for you.

“You are very punctual,” you tease him and he smiles at you.

“You are overdressed, I thought this was sweatpants day?” He looks at your summer dress.

“Not that I’m complaining, this little dress is sexy on you, and it’s got easy access,” he wiggles his eyebrows at you.

“You are denied access today, and I am going to change into my sweats, you look comfy in yours and I’m jealous,” you laugh and beckon him into your place.

“Have a seat, I’m going to change,” you tell him.

“Can I have a seat on your bed and watch you?” Ivar inquires, fake innocence in his voice.

You just look him over and tut, walking away, smiling when you know he can’t see you.

You come back into your living room and he is sitting super close to your spot on the sofa. He smiles as you walk in, and looks you up and down. You have a hoodie on but have deliberately chosen some shorts so he can see some skin.

“You're not going to be cold?” He asks, smirking. You smile and shake your head.

“So, what shall we watch?” You ask him and you take a seat next to him on the couch and cross your legs.

“I don’t know what you want to watch but I’m going to watch you,” he says, eyes trailing over your legs.

“Funny and a bit creepy all at once,” you laugh at him. He chuckles and pulls your closest leg over lap. It feels natural to you so you leave it there.

“Put on something I won’t have seen,” he says to you as his hands rest on your shin.

You think for a second. Something reality TV based, he doesn’t strike you as a reality TV man.

“Oh you are going to regret that, I watch the biggest load of shite there is!” You laugh. “Tell me if my leg starts to hurt yours, ok?” You tell him quietly. He faces you quickly and nods, with a small smile on his face.

You put on The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills and glance at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh shit, yes! Is Lisa Vanderpump still in this? She cracks me up,” he says, looking at you. You are dumbfounded. “What?” He asks.

“I didn’t have you down as a Housewives fan!” You laugh.

“Oh there’s lots you don’t know about me, Y/N,” he gives you a cheeky wink.

You watch the show and his hands stay on your leg occasionally moving them up and down and it feels amazing.

“Keep rubbing my leg, it feels good” you tell him when his hands stop. He smiles but keeps his eyes on the TV. His hands move up and down and start massaging your thigh, you are very aware that your legs are open now his hand is travelling up your thigh.

There is very little material covering you up. As nice as it feels you have no plans for anything sexual to happen between you tonight. You shift to close your legs and you rest your head on his shoulder. If he notices he doesn’t say anything or change his actions. You feel him turn his head slightly and he gives you a small kiss into your hair, sending butterflies flapping in your stomach.

You have been watching trash TV in silence for over an hour. It’s a comfortable silence from you, you suddenly realise this might actually be boring as fuck for him. You forgot for a minute that he is probably used to spending his time doing much more upmarket things than lazing around watching shite TV.

“Ivar, are you bored? Sorry, I’ve just realised we haven’t really spoken in the last hour, I got sucked into the show and I feel really comfortable around you,” you apologise to him.

“I’m not bored at all actually, this is exactly what I want to be doing. I hardly ever get the chance to just chill out fully. Someone is always trying to get me to do something I don’t want to do, something business related, even on the weekends. I feel the most relaxed I have in a while.” His tone seems genuine to you. “I'm really enjoying just being next to you,” he admits, shyly.

You are studying his face, not a hint of bullshit is detected and that makes you smile.

“Do you want to kiss me? I want to kiss you. I’ve been thinking about kissing you again since you got here,” you tell him in a matter of fact tone. His tongue travels to his lips.

“I would like that very much,” he answers, voice full of anticipation.

You swing your legs off of his lap and shift yourself until you are facing him, with your legs underneath you. His body shifts so he is facing you, you are close to him again you can smell his shampoo and fabric softener.

You lean into him so your faces are close and press your mouth to his. It starts slowly, small pecks until a spark of lust ignites in you and you are carding your hand through his hair to the back of his neck whilst your other hand runs up his muscular bicep and settles there. You open your mouth at the same time as him and both your tongues slip into the other's mouth in unison. You explore each other and a blush covers your face. No kiss has ever felt so sensual to you, it's making your head spin. He has a hand gripping tightly to one of your thighs whilst the other is on your face.

There are fireworks going off in your stomach, you wonder if he is feeling even half of what you are.

Your lungs start to scream so you pull away, heavily breathing in his air. His eyes open slowly and take a second to focus on you, his hand still on your cheek. You’ve had enough oxygen so you dive back into his kiss, the sensation is intoxicating. You could stay like this for the rest of your life and die happy.

You eventually need to resurface, annoyingly, and you look into his beautiful eyes when you do.

“You are the best kisser,” you tell him, giggling like a schoolgirl.

“Yeah?” His face alight with pride “I’m pretty good all round with my tongue,” he starts laughing and kisses you again. You smile into his mouth at his cheeky response.

You spend an age locked together, you don’t know how much time has passed but you know you haven’t kissed someone for this long since you were a teenager. At some point, and you aren’t even sure when, you have climbed onto his lap and you're straddling him.

When you finally emerge your lips are swollen and red and your hair is dishevelled, so is his. You breathe heavily as you look at each other, smiling. You hear his stomach growl.

“Shit, you are starving. Sorry, I lost track of time! Shall I order some food?” You ask him as you get off his lap carefully. He clears his throat, adjusts his sweatpants and nods. A satisfied smile creeps in your face.

“What do you want? What are you in the mood for?”

“Apart from more of you? Chinese, how about you?” He responds with a smile.

“Ugh I might kiss you again, that’s my favourite!” You exclaim excitedly “I’m going to really try not to eat myself into a food coma,” you warn him and he laughs at you.

“I will tuck you in if you do,” he says with a big smile on his face.

Over dinner the conversation is easy. You tell him about your childhood, your school life, your family and friends and your shop. He seems genuinely interested in you, and it’s interesting to compare how he grew up. Private schooling, maids, chefs, nannies, lavish holidays, college.

“So I am now joint CEO of the company, with my mum, although she is more silent, there in the title alone really. My taking over has caused a bit of a rift with Ubbe, it wasn’t my intention, the board just didn’t think he was ready,” he explains.

“So that’s where the competition and tension comes from, I don’t envy you having to navigate through that, Ivar,” you answer him honestly.

“No, it’s not fun, but sometimes you have to do what’s best for yourself. Like with you, I know you were dating Ubbe, but when I met you I felt something I haven’t felt before. I couldn’t just let that go because of him. I think we might have real potential,” he tells you quietly “I’m sorry if that’s a bit full on, I don’t even really know how you feel about him, or me.”

“Ivar, I have no feelings for your brother. Even if I hadn’t met you, Ubbe and I would have been done. He isn’t for me, I didn’t see a future with him at all. Not that I regret it, because I try not to have regrets, but if I knew how much I was going to like you I would never have dated him, much less slept with him.”

You can see Ivar wince at those words and it’s not pleasant. You put your hand to his cheek. “Sorry if it hurts you.”

“If it bothered me that much I wouldn’t be here,” he shrugs, “can you not sleep with any more of my brothers though?” His face pulls into a wicked smile.

You take in a deep breath and pull up one side of your mouth. “No promises sunshine, I haven’t met them all yet.” Ivar lets out a massive laugh and you follow suit.

“Technically, without dating Ubbe we would never have met…” your voice trails off.

“I will be sure to thank him in the wedding speech then.” Ivar says boldly, not a hint of embarrassment on his face. You let out a shocked laugh and change the subject.

“So tell me more about your usual wooing methods.” You ask him. “Do you really buy women those expensive bracelets? It’s insane if you do, and just FYI, they are a little ugly!” You whisper the last part to him with an awkward smile on your face.

He laughs loudly. “The type of women I have been used to dating are usually from very well off families and these types of gifts are expected. It’s kind of the norm,” he shrugs.

“Dude, you need to meet better women, normal women, not women who expect diamonds off you before you’ve even started dating!” You wag a finger at him.

“I think I have, haven’t I?” His face is full of hope. He is adorable, you lean over the table to plant another kiss on his lips and wrinkle your nose at him, smiling.

--------------------------------------------

Despite trying your hardest not to fall into a food coma, you both do. You move back to the sofa sitting close together again. You notice that Ivar is fidgeting around a lot.

“Are you okay?”

“My legs are starting to hurt,” he admits quietly.

“What can I do to help? Do you have painkillers? Do you want me to rub them? You rubbed mine enough today!” You offer him. His head turns towards you slowly, surveying your face.

“I don’t want you to see them,” he says quietly, embarrassed.

“OK. I don’t have to see them to rub them, if it would feel nice? I don’t have to though, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable here,” you are a little flustered and hope you haven’t offended him.

He is quiet for a while trying to decide what to do. You turn back to the TV so he doesn’t feel pressured to answer you.

“I don’t want you to touch them. I don’t want you to be turned off by me in any way.” It’s taken him courage to say that, you can tell from the blush in his cheeks.

“I wouldn’t be turned off by you, Ivar, trust me. I will be gentle,” you tell him and he gives a quick nod. “Do you want to lay down and put them over me?” You ask him and he nods quickly again and undoes his braces.

You both get into position and you put a gentle hand on his thigh and start rubbing softly. “Is this okay? Tell me if I’m going too rough or you like it a different way, okay?”

You tell him and turn back to the TV.

“I don’t know how I like it, no one has ever offered to do this for me. No one has touched them except nurses and doctors since I was a child.” His voice is so small.

“Well, I will rub them any time for you, if it will help and you like it, I know how good it feels for me and I haven’t even got any pain.” You say honestly.

He lets out a deep sound of relief when you start to touch him more, massaging as gently as you can. It feels so good to be able to help him in any small way you can.

You continue massaging his legs and watching TV until you hear small snores from the man beside you. You smile at his angelic face. He doesn’t seem at all like his reputation, you think to yourself.

You don’t want to wake him but it’s getting late and you don’t think your sofa will do his pain levels any good so you very carefully remove his legs from your lap and crawl over to wake him up. You give him a little kiss on his cheek and as he stirs you peck him on the lips.

“Ivar, wake up, it’s getting late” his eyes open and he inhales deeply.

“Thanks for rubbing my legs, I feel so relaxed. I will call my driver and go home. Thanks for a lovely day,” he tells you and kisses you.

“Do you want to stay over with me? Just to sleep though,” you offer.

His face breaks into a smile “I did bring a bag with my meds and stuff just in case!” You let out a huff of laughter at his cheekiness.

“Oh yeah? Thought you were going to get lucky did you?” You tease him with raised eyebrows.

His face pulls into an awkward smile. “I can neither confirm nor deny that there are condoms in my bag.”

“Well you will be leaving with as many as you came with!”

“Shit am I going bareback?” He says with widened eyes. Your face breaks into a shocked smile and you start laughing loudly.

“I’m just kidding, Y/N! Thanks, I would love to stay, I will keep my dick in my pants I promise!” He pulls your face to his for another kiss.

You help him up and show him where your bedroom is. You let him use the bathroom first and you get ready in the other room, to give you both some privacy. When you enter your bedroom he is under the covers with no top on and you can see a bunch of tattoos you didn’t know were there.

“Hey! That's not fair, how am I supposed to keep this sleepover clean if you flash your tattoos at me?!” Your mouth agape as your eyes sweep over him.

“The same way I’m going to have trouble with you in those tiny shorts, I can see asscheeks,” he retorts.

“Touché,” you wink at him and get into bed.

“Do you think I could get a few kisses?” You ask in fake innocence.

“Come here,” he pulls you to him and the kissing starts again, god this is the horniest you’ve been in a while, but you don’t want to sleep with him yet, you actually like him and don’t want it to turn into a one night stand. You remind yourself that despite today, and getting on really well, you don’t know him at all, and there’s an underlying unease regarding the Ubbe situation.

You break apart and you are lying side to side looking at each other.

“Good night, Y/N,” he runs his hand through your hair. “I really had a great day with you.”

“Night, Ivar. I did too,” you say sleepily.

Chapter 7

#modern ivar #ivar lothbrok #ivar ragnarsson #ivar the boneless #modern vikings #vikings au #vikings modern au #ivar fanfic #modern!au #vikings #ivar vikings #ivar smut #ivar x reader #ivar imagine #vikings ivar #ivar the boneless x reader #ivar x y/n #ivar #ivar x you #ivar fluff #modern ubbe #ubbe ragnarsson #ubbe #ubbe fanfiction #ubbe lothbrok #ubbe imagine #ubbe x reader #ubbe x you #aslaug

[onesweetworld18]

I posted 16,023 times in 2022

That's 2,502 more posts than 2021!

1,020 posts created (6%)

15,003 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@lovingstheantidote

@hldailyupdate

@yourgoldenview

@allwaswell16

@dailytomlinson

I tagged 3,385 of my posts in 2022

#wow - 45 posts

#pta mom - 29 posts

#i love this - 28 posts

#i love him - 24 posts

#this is amazing - 23 posts

#oh my god - 23 posts

#omg - 17 posts

#this - 17 posts

#yes - 17 posts

#louis tomlinson - 17 posts

Longest Tag: 122 characters

#if harry’s favorite group of people is his merry band of white men managers i think i would stab myself with a steak knife

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I will do a post-show write up, but I think this sums it up the best. I asked my mom after the show which of the three that she has seen did she like the best (Harry, Niall, or Louis) and she said, “I think Louis. They are all very good. Niall really like the music and is very talented, Harry puts on a show, but Louis is all heart. You can tell he’s all heart.”

And like if that doesn’t explain Louis I don’t know what does.

421 notes - Posted February 13, 2022

#4

Ok, a few notes on the Louis show.

I was in the VIP viewing area so I was right in front of where he came on. Security kicked EVERYONE out aside from press. Like Elie Goulding’s crew even had to move to the back of my section. His whole team (Matt and Mark managers) and people who look like they were in the BMG camp were there and behind me.

The way Louis walks with the absolute BDE energy is insane. Seeing it in person is just truly, truly unreal to witness. He truly is a wonderful person to just admire.

Josh runs around everywhere and sings as he is filming.

Krystal is shorter than I thought she would be!

People did the “woo woo woo” thing Harry does during his shows and the people from Elise’s crew were so so confused so I had to explain why that was happening. They found it odd (as did I.)

While Louis wasn’t overly chatty, he was so fucking amazing and had the crowd in the palm of his hand. Everyone was into him and basically him alone. I truly don’t know if anyone came specifically for another artist. (Speaking as an Oldie™️) who is Young Gravy and why is he a thing? He was disgusting.

Oli got stopped for trying to go backstage. My friend goes “what does he do?” And I explained his role and she found it amazing.

I love Louis so much. Bigger Than Me sounds so good live. It’s just going to get better.

They played Harry like 5 times before/during the sets.

I love him. I love him. I love him!

There was also a huge ad for his album on the screens as we were leaving!

See the full post

450 notes - Posted September 16, 2022

#3

Sometimes I’m reminded of Louis going to Barcelona and Harry showing up with the Barcelona coin bracelet just as soon as Louis came back and like I need to lie down. Must be the mold.

459 notes - Posted November 2, 2022

#2

Coachella was an opportunity for the general public and (mostly) non or casual fans to see Harry. These are the people who read the headlines, believe what they are told, and (probably) believe the womanizing het narrative they’ve been sold. But instead of playing it safe, instead of toeing the line, Harry didn’t play. He said rainbow sequin jumpsuit and gay cowboy fantasy with my initials on the ass. These people saw the Harry we have known for 10 plus years. The flamboyant, supportive, funny, talented, flamboyant, goober he is. I hope that at least a small percentage of these people will leave and go “that was gay. That wasn’t the dude I’ve been told about” and question the narrative they’re forced. He isn’t that, and I’m really glad Harry got to prance in front of 100,000 people and be the Harry we know and love. I hope everyone else catches on that HARRY is enough.

829 notes - Posted April 23, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Harry having a pretentious music festival forced to sing and listed to “What Makes You Beautiful” a song and fan base that has been constantly disparaged and overlooked by music snobs and executives is probably the best and biggest flex ever.

1,099 notes - Posted April 16, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #A nice list

[creelimagines]

Welcome to this blog!

Here, I post random ideas without a consistent schedule or plan. It’s about a possible alternate ending for Henry Creel/Peter Ballard’s storyline who to save myself hell and because it’s the name I think he’d prefer, I call him Henry in this post and the rest of the blog.

I also reblog things related to Henry and eleven, and perhaps some x reader fics sometimes DONT JUDGE ME

Me

Name: Bee 🐝

Pronouns: she/her 💃

Attraction: bicurious 💖🤍💙

Other notes: over 18, Jewish ✡️

Inbox: Open to suggestions, ideas, and anything else!

This story is self-indulgent.

Please read below!

Though I am ok with criticism, I ask you keep in mind that Henry is a character that can be interpreted and seen in many ways. And what one person might see in him the other won’t. My assumptions are based on the show, Jamie’s words about Henry, and my knowledge and research in psychology and psychopathology.

Personally I see him as he described himself in the monologue, distant from humanity, he’s quite psychopathic towards those who are not like him. Making him seem quite cold and repulsive by people, except Eleven and other people who came from the experiments.

✨The story✨

Long story short, Henry and Eleven plus another third person I will talk about shortly, escape from the facility before they get chased by guards like they did in the show. Leaving out through the woods and out to the world.

When outside henry tells his plan to Eleven, who disagrees with him. But with her importance to him as the only person who truly understands him, he decides to simply do what he can to make her see and truly experience the human world. hoping that she’ll see what he means, and eventually agreed to his plan. Things don’t go that way of course, this mostly focusing on Eleven showing Henry the good in the world and in humans, and that it wasn’t all the hell that he believed it was.

They move around the US, eventually settling down for a short while in Henry’s old home, before managing to find a more comfortable place for themselves in Hawkins. Eleven going to school, while Henry is like always planning for the worst and researching about the world to make his final plan. Wanting to hit the lab first.

Henry’s relationship with Eleven is similar to a very protective older brother

✨The third person = TOO = The Other Orderly✨

Warning: 🔞 (mentions only)

While still in the Hawkins national laboratory, Henry found himself a coworker which he could have as a ‘lover’ of sorts. Their dynamic being that of really coworkers with benefits, there’s no serious emotion, from Henry’s side at least, in this relationship. Besides some mad attraction that without it, it would’ve probably never happened in the first place.

The lady herself is another orderly of course and at the moment I don’t have ideas for her name. But she’s always had eyes for Henry like he had for her, except in her case the poor woman has fallen in love. And is constantly battling the fact that as far as she knows, Henry will never really love her more than physically.

He brings her along to the escape simply for convenience, since it’ll certainly be difficult for him to form a relationship like that outside of Hawkins lab. Since it’s also the only place where he didn’t have to fake his real wants and emotions, it was something hard for him to let go.

THERE WILL BE NO NSFW ON THIS BLOG, AND SUGGESTIONS OR ASKS THAT ARE NSFW WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED

NOTE: this character, if you like, could be an X reader with Henry! I indulge you to see it as that if you like :D

#mine #pinned #Henry Creel #peter ballard #imagine #001 #001 stranger things #001 x reader #peter ballard x reader #peter ballard x you #henry creel x reader #stranger things #stranger things 4 #st 4 #st 4 au #stranger things AU #stranger things 4 au #eleven #eleven stranger things

[felixcatton]

hello! I found your blog from your gg blog, and I was hoping it would be ok if I could ask why delena is one of your least favourite ships? you said you stopped watching after season 3 and they do not get together until post season 3, so I was curious about why you dislike them a lot if you haven't really seen them as a couple? I ship datherine and steroline so I never cared about the love triangle so i'd love to pick your brain if that's okay :)

hi! i’m so sorry for the late response! here’s a long-as-ever response to make up for it. hopefully you’ll still see this!

so just gonna say off that bat that after all of these years the tvd ship wars are still too intense for my liking hahaha and i genuinely have no interest in fighting (and sometimes even just debating) about ships, especially ones that i’ve had my mind made up about for over a decade, so while i like to share my thoughts, i typically prefer to just sort of... shush about certain ships, delena included. i have a lot of mutuals and friends who love delena and i’m more than happy to just quietly coexist lol. i have no desire to post loads of anti delena content beyond this post.

and fair warning, it’s been several years since i’ve watched tvd (i’m thinking of rewatching soon but idk) so some plot details have been forgotten and as you know, literally ALL of my opinions of these characters and ships are based solely on s1-3. idk much about what happened between them all later on and idk what kind of characters they developed into. so if anyone reading is ever thinking “but what about this scene in season 5″ just know that i did not and will not see it lol.

i guess to me it felt like his love for her was selfish, like so much of that relationship was built on damon trying to one-up his brother and “get the girl” this time, and the rest of it was built on lust. a lot of their scenes felt shallow to me. i didn’t get what they actually liked about each other or related to each other about. even ignoring the terrible things he did to her family and friends, i felt that there was a lot about elena that stefan understood and damon didn’t, and i felt that stefan respected her and her priorities and needs much more.

most of all, i just found stelena more compelling and i thought that they were very much the story that the show was telling before plec started doing her Thing. it was an oddly human story between a human and a non-human. two dead people coming back to life, i think is how kevin williamson put it. i still think that that love, in all its different forms, was the centre of the show. it was human love, not some intense, transcendent, godly love (which can absolutely be fun in tv ships! but only when it suits BOTH characters involved). and elena as i knew her in s1-3 wanted to be human. i did feel like while she definitely did love damon before she was a vampire (i know some stelena fans think that she never should have fallen in love with him given what he did to caroline, jeremy, etc., and i agree to some extent but her falling for him is not in and of itself a huge source of frustration for me), she would always have chosen stefan as a human, which was the life she always truly wanted. she was SO clear about that. maybe damon did fit her life better when she was a vampire,i wouldn’t know, but it just feels moot to me when that’s... not what she wanted to begin with. (but i mean, ideally, frankly, both stefan and damon would just get out of her life and let her be normal lol).

i stopped watching because i just kind of had no interest in the direction the show was taking elena in through that relationship. it felt so contradictory to all that i thought about her as a character, like i would be sitting through several seasons of “this is what elena loves and wants!” when i just didn’t believe that. and i just kind of sensed from the second they put delena together that they would now be The Ship and i didn’t care to see it lol. i felt my problems with them as a ship were all quite central to their dynamic and would never be developed out of them, y’know what i mean? i’m sure they changed and developed in certain ways throughout the rest of the show, but i just can’t imagine that there’s anything that would make me like them more at all. i think more people should just quit shows when they start hating the writing; we’d all have much fewer ship-related headaches!

fwiw, i do think i’d ship steroline if i ever continued the show, because i love both characters and loved their friendship so, so much, and i actually always wonder if i’d even actively ship post-s3 stefan with post-s3 elena. but never delena. and always s1-3 stelena.

#the vampire diaries #anti delena #anti damon salvatore #answered #anonymous #long post

[ai-satires]

Watch Live. LOST 1 million dollars in stocks. REAL market horror updated...

Taped LIVE 5-16-2023 near close of market *** NOT satire, this SAD and TRUE **** YES this is VERY REAL! These people tell us they are screwed! And we kinna agree! This is directly from one of our viewers: Hello everyone, We knew you would think this may be fake. *** PROOF is in the video. *** I'm showing you my watch list which shows the current "dow" and "nas" in the video to substantiate that this is current (today) and taped live prior to market closing today (May 16th 2023). Why are we doing so bad? History on us: We worked for 49 years (wife and I) and we sold our home in 2019. We purchased a small condo near the water. Thinking we can use the 1.250M we profited to retire and play the market, which we have EVER thought of before. We needed a good source of income to keep up our very plush lifestyle. And there was nothing out there that we felt can give us the income we reuired. We worked our asses off, so yes we deserve to live our last years in the fashion of our choosing! 2018: In mid 2018, we unfortunately decided to try out the stock market thing...that thing everyone speaks about. We NEVER asked for professional advice. We made 192K our first 7 months trading with $650K invested using Etrade.  We figured we did so well that we are too smart to ask for help and look how good we are already doing. We got most of the stock news and advice from TV and some articles we would read online. 2019: We continued trading into late 2019. We were still doing OK in early 2019. By late 2019 we had 980K invested in our etrade account to trade with. Next the entire market dropped based on corona. And when things dropped we had no money left to buy anything, since it was all tied up in stocks we purchased before the corona crash. 2023: Since early 2020...3 years we are still buried in 95% of our stocks and it continues. And it was not all pre corona mistakes, Yes we put more money into the account in 2021/2022/2023 and traded again...and you can see TODAY how that turned out. ***** HELP AND ADVICE ***** 1. STOP if you are NEW to trading & read above first, It could save you your savings & sanity! Afterward you can decide. 2. Also if anyone can give us advice (only legal advise), please chime in. As of today 5-16-23 , we only have 35K left to invest. If we think we should sell something or buy something....again only if your advice is legit and not illegal or evil. ***IMPORTANT DISCLOSURE*** We had angry guests on our AI satire stock market blog. Many people wrote us that they didn't find it funny, since they lost most of their money in the market. So we chose one of those people and asked them to share their portfolio live and daily with us. Please watch at the beginning and end of every trading day to see their progress! NO satire in this playlist. #stockmarketwarning #stockmarketforbeginners  #stocks #stockmarketlive #stockmarketlivetoday #stockmarketportfolio #Stockmarketloser #lostmymoneystocks #Stockmarketloss #Ilostmymoney #ilostmoneystocks #Lostmymoneystockmarket #Milliondollarloss #lostonemillionstockmarket

#youtube

[flightlessangelwings]

Just Kiss Like Real People Do

Tasm!Peter Parker x gn!reader (no pronouns, no y/n)

Word count: 5.2k

Warnings: smut (18+ ONLY!), soft sex, heated sex, protective!Peter, mild injury and blood, idiots in love, mutual pining, fluff, action, love confessions, Peter and reader are grown in this one

Notes: Thank you SOOOO much to @rae-gar-targaryen​ my love for reading through this and giving me opinions on this!!! And for the title too cause I was drawing a blank lol (yes it’s Hozier). First time writing Peter so I wanted to make sure I did him right!! But I’m so happy with how this turned out so I hope y’all like this too! And I did leave this open ended on purpose and can be convinced to write more if this does well and there’s demand for it! So let me know what you think!

Feel free to also follow my update blog and turn on post notifs to stay up to date on when I post @flightlessangelwings-updates​

~

“Damn Peter, you’re so tense today,” you exclaimed.

It was present in the tenseness of his shoulders, the line of his profile taut like a string ready to snap. 

Peter sat on the floor in front of you in your small studio apartment as you sat on your bed and rubbed his shoulders. It was a routine the two of you developed over time, and it was something completely unspoken. Your entire relationship with him was unspoken, in fact. The two of you had been best friends for years, and as you grew into adulthood, it blossomed into more. Although he never officially asked you out, the two of you spent most of your free time together and you were comfortable with how things were.

At least that’s what you both told yourselves.

Peter laughed as he dropped his head forward, “I know, I know,” he let out a relieved sigh “Have I ever told you how amazing you are at this though?”

You heard the smile in his voice, even if you couldn’t see his face, 

“Just the other day,” you quipped back with a grin of your own. Every word of praise from Peter always made your heart flutter in your chest. A rush of euphoria ran through your veins as you felt your hands tingle for a moment. You felt your heart skip a beat, the way it always did whenever Peter complemented you so sweetly and so genuinely. He never knew how much his words truly affected you, though, as you kept your growing admiration for him well hidden, worried of ruining what the two of you had built up.

You trailed your knuckles up the sides of this neck and a smirk lit up your face when you saw his skin break out into goosebumps beneath your touch. Once you reached the base of his scalp, you buried your fingers in his hair and rubbed small, firm circles into his scalp. Delighting in the way Peter practically purred every time you did that, and his hair felt so soft under your hand.

“Well, I’ll tell you again because you are,” he replied in a low tone as he leaned into your touch. 

If you only knew how much your massages really helped him. But, Peter didn’t want to put you in any danger by telling you his secret, even if at times it killed him inside to leave you in the dark. He could never forgive himself if anything happened to you, especially if it was because of him.

“You carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, Pete,” your voice softened as you ran your fingers back down his neck and pushed the collar of his shirt aside to reach another muscle. You inhaled sharply when you saw a prominent bruise on his skin and you gasped as you tugged at his shirt, “Peter, what happened?! What the hell did you do?!”

“Hey, hey,” he tried to calm you down as he turned and faced you, “I’m ok, I promise.”

But you had the upper hand and you managed to get his shirt off to reveal several more bruises and cuts on his shoulders and sides. Your eyes scanned over his skin as your expression, and your heart, dropped. “Peter…”

Peter scrambled to his knees and cupped your face as he whispered your name, “I’m ok,” he repeated in a more confident voice, “Promise.” 

The look in his eyes was sincere as he stared into you and gently traced his thumb across your cheek. His other hand rested on your hip; a familiar touch, it was his special way of embracing you. Your heart pounded in your chest as a thousand questions ran through your mind. But, at least the most pressing question was answered for you: Peter was ok.

Neither of you was sure who moved first, but slowly, ever-slowly, the two of you inched towards each other until his lips hovered over yours. Brushing. The kiss was soft and sweet at first, but you soon parted your lips to deepen the kiss, and Peter eagerly accepted your invitation. The two of you clung to each other as heat rose between your bodies, and you ran your hands across his bare chest.

When exactly your relationship with Peter grew beyond just a friendship, neither of you could say. Perhaps it was one night when you drank too much and kissed before you realized what you were doing. But, he never pushed you away and you never pushed him away and it just became something else unspoken in your relationship. Could you even call it that? What would you call what you had exactly?

Both of you moved slowly as Peter lifted himself onto your bed and clawed at your clothes. You tugged at his pants as the two of you stripped each other and shifted on your bed until you were both completely naked, you straddling his waist. Peter looked up at you with soft eyes as you rocked your hips against his length. Soft moans escaped his lips as he ran his hands up your sides. Goosebumps of your own erupted on your skin under his gentle touch and you felt the welcome warmth of his hands on your body.

He whispered your name before you leaned forward and took his lips with yours again. You buried your hand in his soft hair as you rocked slowly against him. Peter guided your hips, but wasn’t in any rush, either. The feeling of you against his cock as you ground against him slowly was pure bliss to him. Both of you lavished in the special connection that only the two of you shared.

As you continued to move against Peter, you felt your need quickly build, and you felt his own need for you start to burn beneath his skin. Soon enough, you both wanted, needed, more and you lifted your hips so you lined yourself up with his cock. Just as slowly as you rocked against him, you sunk down and let Peter’s length push into you inch by inch. Moans and groans from both of you filled your small apartment as you gently impaled yourself on his cock.

Once you fully seated yourself on Peter, and his length was completely buried inside you, you paused and stared at him with a pleading expression. You ran your hands along his face as if you were scared that he was an illusion. 

This wasn’t the first night he’d come to you with his body covered in cuts and bruises, but he never wanted to talk about how he got them. It terrified you to no end that he was out on the streets of New York getting into trouble, and your biggest fear was that one day he’d never come back to you.

As if he read your thoughts, Peter rested one hand on your hip and one on the side of your face, his familiar embrace just for you, “I’m here,” he said softly, “I’m ok.”

“You’re ok,” you echoed breathlessly as you lifted your hips up and lowered yourself back down.

Any thoughts either of you had suddenly disappeared as you rode Peter slowly while he held you tightly. Nothing else mattered except for the feeling of you against Peter, and Peter against you. You let out heavy breaths and soft moans as you rode him,the feeling of Peter inside you and around you was warm and comforting. A heated embrace.

He held you tightly as you bounced on his cock, and Peter groaned as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against you. The slow pace was different for both of you, yet it was just what you both needed in that moment; you both needed each other. You needed to feel his heartbeat and warmth of his skin against you to remind you he was alive and here with you. And he needed to feel your comfort and affections against his body. Peter didn’t even try to move as he let you take control for now. All he did was hold you close and watch as you rocked against him.

“Peter…” you whined softly as you held onto his shoulders for support. You felt the familiar heat build within you as you rode his cock.

“I know, sweetheart,” he murmured.

Your body trembled as you felt your climax quickly approach. You held onto Peter so tightly that your nails dug into his skin, but neither of you could find it within yourselves to care. All that mattered now was this. Peter would wear any marks and bruises you gave him with pride. As you clung to him, you let out a loud scream as your orgasm took you over. His cock hit that sweet spot inside you over and over again as you rode out your climax on his lap.

Just as your orgasm hit, so did Peter’s. He held you just as tightly as you held him as he bit down onto your shoulder to muffle his own cry. The two of you rode out your orgasms together as you each clung to each other as if your lives depended on it.

Peter wrapped his arms around you and flopped down onto the bed with you in his arms. Heavy breaths filled the space as you both came down from your highs. 

There were so many things you wanted to talk to him about, but for now, you just wanted to savor the feeling of being in his arms. 

Peter wanted to tell you the truth. He wanted to tell you he was Spiderman and that you had nothing to worry about. He could take care of himself, and protect you too. But knowing his secret came with a risk, and there was no way he would lose someone he cared about. Not again.

“Hey,” Peter broke the silence that had fallen between you, “Why don’t we do something tomorrow?”

You grinned as you kept your eyes closed, too content to open them, “That sounds great.”

Peter smiled as he gave you a tight squeeze, “It’s a date,” he whispered as he placed a kiss on the side of your head.

Before you knew it, you fell asleep in Peter’s arms. Your tiny bed wasn’t made for two people, but the two of you made it work as you shifted around in your sleep. Peter stayed awake, though, and just listened to the sound of your deep breaths for hours. He wanted to stay here all night, but he knew that duty called, so he carefully slid out of your bed and tiptoed to your window and leapt out without a sound.

You weren’t sure what time it was, but at some point in the night you woke up and found yourself alone. It wasn’t the first time it happened, and you weren’t hurt by it. Neither of you made a commitment out loud to each other, and he was free to come and go as he pleased. Though you had to admit it would be nice to wake up with Peter still there in the morning. The only thing you found odd was that although he was gone, the deadbolt on your door was still locked. And the window was open.

*

“So are you going to tell me where we’re going or not?” you playfully nudged Peter’s arm as the two of you stood on the crowded bus.

“That kind of defeats the point of a surprise, honey,” he retorted back just as playfully. 

You rolled your eyes, but decided not to try and get him to reveal his secret. Besides, the way he smiled at you took out any fight you had left. You even decided not to bring up that he snuck out in the middle of the night, either. For now, you just wanted to spend a fun day with your… Your Peter. You stared at his handsome face as if you tried to study every little detail of his features. His eyes lit up when he caught you staring, and the two of you grinned stupidly at each other.

But, his face suddenly dropped. Something felt off and Peter was instantly on high alert. Before you could open your mouth to ask what was wrong, he wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you close. As you found yourself flush against this chest, you felt how hard his heart pounded, and you had no idea what to make of his sudden shift in behavior. You watched as he looked around with a sharp gaze and you followed his eyes out the window. The bus had just gotten on a high bridge, and you looked out at the cars on the road below.

“Peter… What…?”

Your question was cut off by an explosion, and you were ripped from Peter’s grasp. The two of you were launched in opposite directions, and all your breath was pushed out of your body as you landed hard on the floor of the bus. Dust clouded your vision, but you saw that the bus had broken in the explosion, and the side you landed on now teetered over the edge of the bridge.

Chaos erupted as people screamed and scrambled to get off the bus. You quickly scrambled to your feet before you got trampled and joined the rush of people that rushed to get off before the bus fell off the side of the bridge. You coughed as you tried to catch your breath, and already you felt the soreness from how hard you landed. But, there was only one thing on your mind.

“Peter!?” you shouted as you looked for him, “Peter?!”

But he was nowhere to be found, and you started to panic. Your mind went to the worst possible scenario and just as the last person in front of you got off the broken bus, you turned around and made sure he wasn’t unconscious at the front of the bus. As you strained to look through the dust, you didn’t see Peter.

Your relief was momentary though as you spotted someone else instead. A small child was curled up near the very front of the bus and cried loudly. Just as you laid your eyes on the child, you heard a woman’s voice scream, “My baby! My baby’s still on the bus!”

Swallowing your fear, you decided you had to do something. So, though your hands shook, you quickly jumped back into the bus and ran towards the crying child. Just as you reached the kid, the bus creaked and tilted more off the edge of the bridge.

“Hey, I’ve got you. Come on,” you grabbed the child, who immediately clung to you.

But time was not on your side, and before you could run back to safety, the bus fell forward more, and you lost your balance. You screamed, but you kept a tight grip on the child as you both fell forward. Thinking quickly, you reached out with your free hand and grabbed onto the bar on the front window. You wailed in pain as the broken glass from the window cut into your hand, but you fought with every ounce of strength to hold on. The child in your other arm buried her face in your shoulder and cried as she clung to you tightly.

“Shit,” you cursed under your breath. You tightened your grip on the child in your other arm, “Don’t look down, kid,” you said, “Don’t look down,” you repeated to yourself.

Peter had ducked away in the chaos of the crowd after the explosion. He was launched away from you, but luckily wasn’t hurt. As soon as he glanced up and made sure you weren’t injured, he ran into the shadows, becoming Spiderman. Peter hated having to leave you like this, but he knew he could do more help as his masked counterpart. What he didn’t expect, however, was to come back to the scene to find you dangling off the edge.

“No…” he gasped. His eyes went wide as he clung to the side of a nearby building to access the damage before he swung in. The moment he saw you hanging off the edge with your bloodied hand holding onto the bus, his blood ran cold. Peter hadn’t felt this type of fear in so long, and even the thought that he could lose you made his heart freeze in his chest.

In a sudden jolt, the bus lurched forward again, the movement making you lose your grip. You and the child both screamed as you fell towards the ground. You shut your eyes and wrapped yourself around the kid as you said a silent goodbye to the one person you cared about more than anything. 

But, you didn’t fall far until you felt a strong set of arms around you and suddenly instead of falling down, you were lifted up. With a gasp, you opened your eyes and saw the distinct red and blue fabric that belonged to New York’s most prominent hero.

“I’ve got you,” Spiderman said, as he landed the three of you safely on the bridge.

“Spiderman!” the child gleefully cheered as he reached out and hugged him.

“Mija!” The child’s mother ran forward from the crowd and called her name. She broke away from you and Spiderman and ran to her mother, who collapsed down to the ground in relief. The child and mother embraced tightly before the mother looked up at the two of you and whispered a soft, “Gracias, Spiderman,” she turned to you, “Y usted tambien.”

“De nada,” you replied weakly.

Spiderman looked between you and the woman before he echoed in an unconfident, “De… de nada.”

Spiderman watched the mother and child rejoin the crowd before he turned back to you and said your name, “Are you alright?”

You were in a state of shock that you swore you heard your name, and you were sure you knew the voice behind the mask that spoke that familiar, unsteady Spanish. You looked into the eyes of his mask as he held you tightly. You heard how hard and heavy his breaths were as he held you with one hand on your hip and one hand on the side of your face. It felt so familiar, so comforting, yet this was the first time you had seen the famous Spiderman in person before.

“Are you ok?” he repeated more urgently as he tightened his grip on you. It felt as if Spiderman was scared for your safety with how tightly he held you. And you weren’t sure if you imagined the way his voice trembled too.

It took you a moment to find your voice but you nodded, “I’m ok,” you replied weakly. “Thank you,” you added softly, “For saving my life.”

“You’re hurt,” he dropped the hand from your face to your own hand where several pieces of glass were embedded in it. 

You looked down at your bloodsoaked hand and the pain rushed back to you. But you tried to keep your composure, “It’s not that bad,” you lied, “I’ll be ok.”

Just as you were sure he was about to say something, a loud creak from the bus called his attention. He looked back and forth between you and the bus before he grasped your shoulders tightly, “Stay here.”

Before you could answer, Spiderman flipped away and swung himself towards the bus. He flicked his wrists and stuck his webs to the bus, just in the nick of time. It creaked as it teetered over the edge, and the crowd gasped as everyone watched Spiderman strain with every ounce of strength in his body to keep it from falling over the edge and down to the crowd below.

You stood in awe as you held your injured hand and watched the man who just saved your life now try to save others. As you stared at the masked hero, you suddenly noticed the strain on his body from how he slowly hauled up the huge bus. Just like that, everything clicked in your head as you thought back to the day before when you rubbed Peter’s shoulders. You gasped as all the bruises and his disappearances made sense, and especially so since Spiderman seemed to know your name somehow.

With one final grunt, Spiderman pulled the bus back onto the road and away from any danger. The crowd behind you cheered and applauded for the hero who gave one final wave before he flicked his wrists and whooshed away. The entire time, you couldn’t even move a muscle in your body.

As you watched Spiderman swing away, you had so many thoughts in your head. Suddenly, everything made sense, and you were overwhelmed with emotions. You even completely forgot about the pain of the glass that was stuck in your hand from the weight of the thoughts in your head. It wasn’t until you heard your name in a familiar voice that you were brought back to the present.

“Oh my god,” Peter ran up, out of breath, from the crowd, “Are you ok?” He immediately wrapped his arms around you and hugged you as tightly as he could. You could have sworn you heard him sniffle as he buried his head against you.

“I’m ok,” you were breathless as you nuzzled yourself against Peter. You clung to him with your uninjured hand as you fought back tears of your own.

“You’re hurt,” the words sounded eerily similar as Peter reached down and gently took your bloody hand in his.

Words failed you and you stared into his eyes and saw how misty they were.

“Come on, we gotta get you to the hospital,” Peter said in an urgent tone.

“I can’t go to a hospital,” you suddenly found your voice as you spoke quickly, “I lost my health insurance, remember? I can’t afford it.”

Peter sighed heavily and dropped his shoulders. You were right of course, neither of you could afford it, and it killed Peter inside that he couldn’t help you. Luckily, your injury wasn’t too bad and he could tend to you himself. 

“Alright,” he breathed, “Let’s go to my place, I can patch you up.”

*

You didn’t even remember getting back to Peter’s apartment. Between your hurt hand, the sudden weight of your newfound knowledge, and the way Peter looked at you, your mind was bursting at the seams. Even the tender way he held your hand as he cleaned and wrapped up your cuts. When you hissed in pain, he gave you an apologetic look, but you couldn’t take the silence anymore so you finally mustered the courage to confront him.

“So, when were you going to tell me you’re Spiderman?” you asked.

“I… W-whaaaaaat?” Peter stumbled over his words, his eyes wide, “I’m … I’m … not… Where would you get that idea?” he placed his palm over your forehead, “Did you hit your head, too?” He smiled, crookedly.

You brushed his hand off of you, “Don’t lie to me, Peter,” your voice was stern as you hid how it threatened to waver, “I figured it out.”

Peter just stared at you, mouth agape, as if he didn’t know what to say next. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to tell you; you were his best friend. And maybe … maybe you were something more? But he also didn’t want to put you in any danger, so he kept his life and Spiderman’s life completely separate. He should have known, though, that you were smart enough to eventually find it out on your own.

“You disappeared right before Spiderman showed up,” you filled the silence with your explanation, “I know you leave my apartment at night. But when you do, the bolt on the door is still locked. And the window is open…” you looked at him expectantly, but Peter stayed silent. “He held me just like you do. And…” you paused for a breath, “Spiderman knew my name,” you went on, “How would he know my name?”

“I was hoping you didn’t hear that,” Peter mumbled under his breath, more to himself than to you.

“I’m not mad Peter,” your voice was soft as you spoke. Sure you wished he would trust you with his secret. Who were you going to tell? But you understood why it was important to keep his identity a secret so you went on, “I get it, I do. But right now, I just want you to tell me the truth.”

The two of you stared at each other in a tense silence for several moments, neither knowing what to say next. You fiddled with the bandage on your hand as you watched Peter’s gaze drop down to the floor. As you waited for him to break the silence, he suddenly dropped down to his knees and buried his face in your midsection, the feeling of warm tears soaking your shirt and meeting your skin.

“I was so scared,” Peter admitted as he sobbed into you.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and ran your fingers through his hair, “I was too,” you whispered back.

“No,” he looked up at you, “You don’t understand. I lost someone before. Someone I cared about. She, um…  I couldn’t save her,” tears fell from his eyes, “I couldn’t let that happen again. I can’t lose you too. I can’t…” his voice broke as he couldn’t even finish his thought before he broke down.

Tears of your own formed in your eyes, “You won’t lose me,” you leaned forward and kissed him desperately, “I promise.”

Peter leaned into your kiss as he clung to you. A sudden rush of desperation took over him and he leapt up and launched you both onto his bed. The entire time, his lips never separated from yours. You moaned into his mouth as you found yourself on your back on Peter’s bed, but you trusted him enough to not even open your eyes.

He tangled his tongue with yours as he tugged at your shirt, only breaking away from the kiss to lift it up over your shoulders. You mirrored his actions and yanked his shirt over his head. He allowed you to remove it, and the two of you paused for a moment and just stared at each other, as though you were truly fully seeing one another for the first time..

Sudden desperation took you both over once more as Peter took your lips with his again while he tugged at your pants. You lifted your hips for him and allowed him to take them off, leaving you completely bare on his bed. Peter looked at you with dark eyes as he quickly removed his own pants and climbed on top of you once more. He couldn’t take it slow tonight, and as he rocked his hardened cock against you, he felt how needy you were for him as well.

“Peter… Please…” you begged for him as you bucked your hips against his.

He murmured your name as he gave in to your plea and lined himself up with your entrance. Your mouth dropped open as you felt the tip of his cock stretch you out inch by inch. You wrapped your arms and legs around him and held him close as he pushed himself completely inside you.

Peter was too desperate and immediately thrust his hips against your body, his cock rocking in and out of you at a fast pace. You cried out in pleasure as you dug your nails into his back. He rested his forehead against yours as his heavy breaths echoed in your ear.

“I…” Peter moaned your name as he thrust into you, over and over again, “I love you.”

You moaned in response, too lost in pleasure and your emotions to form words. You felt tears from Peter hit your face and they mixed with your own on your cheek. Emotions ran high between you both as he rocked into you again and again until you felt your climax quickly approach.

“I…” was all you could get out before your orgasm crashed into you and you came with a loud scream.

Peter roaned your name as he thrust into you several more times before he came just as hard. His body trampled on top of yours as he spilled himself inside you and kept his pace up until he physically couldn’t hold himself up anymore. With one last grunt, he collapsed on top of you and the two of you laid connected together in a calm stillness.

You were the first to break the silence as you cupped the back of his head, “I love you too,” you whispered softly against his soft hair.

Peter didn’t reply with his words; he just held you tighter. But, he also knew he had to move before you got too stiff in your position, so he slowly pulled out of you. When you let out a whimper, he kissed the side of your head, which satisfied you. He didn’t go far, either, and Peter immediately gathered you in his arms and held you as close as he could. Together, the two of you laid in his bed wrapped up in the other’s arms, content not to move for some time.

“I'll always protect you, honey,” Peter broke the silence this time as he whispered in your ear.

“And I’ll always take care of you,” you replied in just as hushed a tone. You laid in his arms in a comfortable silence for some time before a question popped into your head, “Hey Peter, where were you gonna take me today?”

Peter laughed sheepishly, “The natural history museum. They have a special exhibit on insects.”

You couldn’t help but burst into laughter, which only made him laugh harder. It felt nice to laugh with him again, and the smile on his face made your heart melt. Somehow, you knew that as long as the two of you had each other, everything would be alright. But, there was also a burning question in your mind.

“So, do you know what happened with the bus today?”

Peter’s face dropped and he held you tighter, “No,” he admitted, “I’ve been chasing this guy for weeks, but I can’t seem to get him,” he looked at you with a fierce expression in his eyes, “But I promise, nothing will happen to you. I swear it.”

You cupped his face and placed a soft kiss on his cheek, “I trust you Peter. And you should trust me to let me help you. We’ll do this together. Just you and me, like we’ve always been.”

Peter sighed. He really didn’t want to get you involved; he wanted to keep you safe. But, he also knew that you were determined and strong. As his mind raced, he felt the way your body deflated in defeat in his arms in his silence, “Alright,” Peter finally replied, “But only if I know that you’re safe. I can’t be out saving the city if I’m worried about you.”

You gave him your fist with your pinky extended, “Deal,” you watched as Peter stared at your hand for a moment before he wrapped his own pinky around yours, “Together,” you whispered.

“Together,” he echoed.

“Just promise me one more thing, Peter.”

He shifted as he looked at you with those soft, sinere eyes, “Anything.”

“Close the window when you leave. It gets chilly at night sometimes,” you giggled.

He couldn’t help but smile at you as he held you closer and kissed the side of your head, “Of course.”

#tasm!peter x reader #tasm!peter parker #tasm!peter parker x reader #tasm!peter parker x you #andrew garfield! peter parker #andrew garfield!peter parker x you #andrew garfield!spiderman x reader #andrew garflield!spiderman x you #tasm!spider-man #tasm!spiderman x you #tasm!spiderman x reader #andrew!peter x reader #andrew garfield #peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #tasm!peter imagine #tasm!peter parker imagine #tasm andrew garfield #andrew garfield!peter parker x reader

[griffintail]

Hello! So I was new at your blog and I feel like ive discovered the 9th cloud of heaven 🤯 so I don't know if youre in the mood but i loved your technoblade child reader fics and i really wanted to ask if you could write a overprotective!tecnho x f!child reader? i feel like it sucks so im not pushing you to do it-

I probably took it a different way than what you were thinking but I hope you still enjoy!

Utmost Care

Pairing: Technoblade X F! Reader

Warnings: Overprotective nature, Light Angst, Mentions of Swords, Mentions of Scars

~~~~~~~~~~~

Techno didn’t hold a lot of things with value but when he finally did, they were protected with the utmost care. That goes the same for living beings. His daughter certainly was one of those beings.

All of (Y/N)’s life, Techno always kept his eye on her or made someone he trusted with his life was watching her, meaning only he or Phil watched her. If Phil couldn’t watch her at the time, Techno then took her with him, keeping her close the entire time. And, if (Y/N) could tell the truth, as she got older, it was tiring.

She was thirteen years old but she wasn’t allowed to go off on her own. She either had to go with Techno and Phil, the only time she could be alone was in her own room. It was extremely tiring when she couldn’t learn new things that could be considered dangerous. Techno wouldn’t teach her to fight or brew or enchant because he said she’d never need it.

She just wanted to do something without the need for approval. She just wanted to be her own person and live her life as she wanted.

So…that’s how she started sneaking out hours at a time. She was only allowed her own peace and quiet in her room? Alright, she used that to her advantage and locked her door when she knew Techno was busy either tending to things and wouldn’t check on her for hours. When she left, she went to the one place she knew mischief was encouraged.

“Uncle Tommy!” (Y/N) grinned as she walked in the door.

“Here comes trouble!” Tommy grinned.

Tommy indeed encouraged the things Techno considered bad. He helped teach the girl how to fight, taught her to brew, showed her a few things with enchanting, and most certainly let her go off on her own around L’Manberg or the SMP, though he did warn her to be more careful in the SMP lands.

(Y/N) felt free and felt like her own person finally without a weight of watchful eye on her.

It was one of those days once more. Tommy was teaching (Y/N) the ways of the sword.

“Come on, stop trying to hit me and hit me!” Tommy grinned cheekily, then yelping as (Y/N) swung as hard as she could with a smirk.

It was just another day for the pair, they just didn’t know it wasn’t another day for Techno. (Y/N) always left when Techno was on his own because he did get distracted when Phil was around or Phil tended to help him. So, if Phil was around, going out was a no-go. Phil usually showed up in the early mornings so she could tell if she could sneak out pretty early in the day.

But, today, Phil had been held up in L’Manberg and came late.

“Hey mate!” Phil called as he walked over to Techno’s.

“Phil, you’re pretty late,” Techno said.

“Yeah, had to help with some things in L’Manberg first.” Phil shrugged. “Farming all by yourself today?”

“(Y/N) said she wanted to read and she might come out later,” Techno told him as they went into the house, Techno resting his hoe by the door. “(Y/N)! The old man’s here.”

“Fuck off mate.” Phil laughed.

Techno smirked as he cleaned off his hands but frowned when he heard no movement in the rooms above.

“(Y/N)!” Techno called once more.

“She might be sleeping in, let her be.” Phil waved it off. “She’s alright.”

But the voices whispered worry, only fueling Techno’s.

“She doesn’t usually sleep in. I’m going to check on her.” Techno said before going up the ladder.

He went to (Y/N)’s room knocking, but there was once more silence. He didn’t like that.

“(Y/N).” He said trying the door handle, but found it locked. “What the-Hey. What’s with the locked door?”

“Techno?” Phil called up concerned by the conversation he was hearing.

She wasn’t saying anything though and the voices whispered panic and Techno reacted. He took a step back before kicking in the door. Phil jumped before quickly coming up the ladder as Techno went into the room.

“Techno!” Phil shouted as he followed after.

Techno’s breath came quicker out of his nose as Phil came in.

“(Y/N)’s not here. Someone took her.” Techno moved past Phil.

Phil looked at his son leaving the room before looking at the teenager’s room. The only mess was the door but (Y/N) indeed wasn’t here and his wings puffed before he rapidly following after Techno.

“You know, the last thing I thought Techno would do was not teach you how to use a sword,” Tommy said as he leaned back on the bench overlooking the river below his base.

(Y/N) sat next to him, both of their training swords laying down close by.

“I always ask him to teach me but he just tells me I don’t need to learn how to fight. I’ll be fine.” She huffed. “What am I going to do if a mob manages to get in? Can you imagine if a creeper managed to come into our house? It could just blow me and the house up because I couldn’t do anything, I might as well just stand still.”

“Ah, he’s always had a stick up his ass.” Tommy waved his hand. “And an ego. He probably thinks he can keep everything from hurting you.”

“But that’s the point uncle Tommy!” (Y/N) exclaimed. “If he taught me, it’s almost a guarantee I won’t get hurt. I could protect myself and go out and meet people. Do whatever I want.”

“He’ll figure it out eventually,” Tommy assured her.

“Alright!”

Both of them jumped as they looked around wildly, Tommy giving a scream, hearing the voice of said man. Then, a moment later, they realized it was their walkies and shared a look.

“Whoever has my kid can bring her back now and have a painless death.”

“Uh oh.” They both muttered.

(Y/N) scrambled to get her things as Tommy stood up in a panic.

“Bye!” (Y/N) shouted before sprinting towards home.

How the hell was she supposed to explain this? Oh no dad, I just decided to wander in the forest with no warm clothes?

“It’s going to be a shitty day.” She muttered as she slipped into the portal and sprinted down the pathway towards the home portal.

Deciding it was better before her father started searching homes, she took out her walkie.

“Dad!” She spoke. “What’s the problem?”

Techno froze in his path, looking at Phil before taking off his walkie. “(Y/N), where are you right now?”

“I just…went for a little walk. My legs were starting to cramp up.” She lied, wincing slightly.

“Your door was locked (Y/N). What happened?”

“I don’t know the door handle must have broke.” She tried as she felt relief seeing the home portal.

“(Y/N), what’s going on?” Techno asked in frustration.

None of this was adding up. What the hell was going on?

“Nothing dad, everything is—” She stepped out of the portal and froze when she was met with two netherite decorated family members. “Fine…”

Phil’s eyes were wide as Techno stood there quiet for a moment.

…

“YOU WENT IN THE NETHER!?” Techno shouted throwing up his arms.

“Dad, look I can explain—” She tried.

“No! I-What were you thinking?!”

“I—”

Techno looked her over. “Is that a sword?! What—You don’t fight! What the hell were you doing?!”

“Look—”

“Mate—” Phil tried to even cut in.

“No! We’re going home.”

Techno went to grab her arm but she moved back.

“LISTEN TO ME FOR ONCE!” (Y/N) shouted as she shook.

Techno stood in shock as Phil took a step back, this was between father and daughter.

“I-I-Yes! I snuck out! And yes! I have a sword! But its-I just wanted to live for once! You don’t let me go out on my own! You don’t let me train or learn anything you do! I stay at home! And read and learn about farming and crafting basic ass shit! And that’s it! If I’m lucky I get to go out to the village with you keeping a close ass eye on me! And I’m tired of it!”

Techno was quiet as (Y/N) took deep breaths before he came towards her.

“You know that to keep you safe.”

“Oh, shove it, dad! What’s the point of being safe when I don’t know anything! I felt like I was going crazy and I-I can’t do that anymore daddy. I can’t.”

(Y/N) had tears in her eyes. She hated it; she was so tired of it. She was so tired.

Techno was stood in shock hesitating before coming over and hugging her tightly.

“I’m sorry.” He muttered to her. “I…I didn’t know it was hurting so much…”

It was a bit awkward of a hug with his armor on but (Y/N) hugged him back regardless.

Techno had wanted to just keep her safe. He had so many enemies and seen so many things in his life…He just didn’t want his little girl to see all the same things he had and he didn’t want her to carry the same scars. But all the while, it seemed he was hurting her in a different way.

“I’m sorry. We’ll figure it out, ok?”

“Please.” She nodded.

He’ll figure it out, he’ll still make sure she was safe, but he’d figure it out for his little girl to be happy…

====================================

General Taglist: @devilchicc @technoblades-sword

(WHY CAN"T I TAG YOU)

#technoblade x reader #mcyt reader insert #mcyt oneshots #mcyt imagine #mcyt fanfiction #dreamsmp x reader

[snelbz]

Life As We Know It {Chapter 24}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays. Occasional surprise chapters could be posted at miscellaneous times. Chapters will be posted on both my and Tara’s blogs! >> @tacmc.​

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

A/N: Sorry for the late post! My baby shower was today, so Tara and I have been extremely busy! Look for Chapter 25 on her blog on Monday!

Warning: 18+ content.

Cassian got to the restaurant and took a look around. There were people everywhere, bustling about, getting ready for the night’s grand opening.

It had become the talk of the town - and the local groups on the internet - so they were expecting a good turnout.

At least, that’s what Cassian’s guess was.

He hadn’t talked to Nesta since he stormed out two days before, with the exception of one text exchange.

Cassian had texted, Tell Nyx I love him and I will see him tomorrow.

Nesta had replied, Ok.

Now, he was searching for that tiny little man with a mop of dark, black hair.

When he finally found Nyx, he was in his stroller eating cheeto puffs off the tray. When he saw Cassian his eyes lit up and he was instantly reaching for him.

Cassian laughed as he unbuckled him from his stroller and picked him up, giving him the biggest hugs. “Hey, buddy. I missed you, too.”

“This is his third helping of cheetos,” Helion said, from where he leaned against the wall. “Sorry about the next diaper.”

Cassian chuckled. “All this going on and Nesta stuck you on baby duty?”

Even saying her name out loud hurt, but he didn’t let it show.

He gestured toward the kitchen and said, “She’s been here since six and she’s in one of her moods. I decided I’d rather be on baby duty than caught in the crossfire.”

He winced, figuring that didn’t bode well for the two of them today. “I’ll stay in the bar, then.”

“That’s probably a good idea,” Helion replied, looking him up and down, before pushing the stroller behind the counter. Cassian had the distinct feeling he was looking for a crack in his armor. He didn’t bother telling him that he’d been broken for two days, and the only person who could fix him was currently yelling at some poor employee in the kitchen.

Cass crossed the threshold into the bar area and let out a low whistle. He’d had a hand in the design, but most of this was all Nesta. It accented the restaurant perfectly and he immediately loved the place.

“Nice, right?”

He turned to find Kallias carrying a tray of fresh glasses from the dish area and the smile on his friend’s face was infectious.

Cassian nodded as Kallias said hello to Nyx. “Yeah, it looks amazing.”

Kallias nodded. “You and Nesta did good.”

“Thanks,” Cassian muttered, not wanting the conversation to go any further. “How long have you been here?”

“Just got here,” Kallias said, as Nyx started playing with the strings on Cassian’s hoodie. “Viv will be here soon to help out. She said she can watch Nyx while we work.”

Cassian nodded. “That would be great.”

It would be helpful, of course, to have Viviane help out watching Nyx. Cassian had a ton to get done in the next six hours before the opening began. He didn’t want to let Nyx go, though. Two days. It was the longest he had been away from Nyx since...everything happened.

“Well, little man, until then, you get to help me unpack liquor bottles,” Cassian said, trying his best to sound excited.

Nyx giggled. “Ba ba ba ba ba ba.”

“Yeah, different kind of bottles,” Cassian chuckled, and carried Nyx with him into the back room.

Kallias had been at the bar for the past two days, getting most of the stock ready to go. A few texts to explain the situation was all he’d needed and Cassian was thankful he had such a loyal friend and coworker.

Elain hadn’t been as understanding the first night he’d been there, but after talking to Nesta, even she backed off. He had no clue what Nesta had said to her, but her frustration turned to sympathy and she was back to treating Cassian like the brother-in-law she loved and not like a man who’d hurt her sister.

After pulling the carrier out of Nyx’s stroller, he strapped the baby to his chest and set to work, carrying case after case of liquor up to the bar. Kallias was busy stocking the assorted glasses they’d need, so the two worked in silence for the most part.

He had just walked back into the store room, short one case of whiskey, when he heard Nesta talking from the dry pantry separating the store room and kitchen. Cassian’s heart lurched and he was about to make his way back into the bar, but Nyx squealed as he heard her voice.

The swinging door flew open as Nesta hurried into the store room, wondering how Nyx had gotten in there in the first place. She froze when she found Cassian there. Their eyes locked and she blinked.

“Hey, Nes,” he said, quietly.

“I…didn’t know you were here,” she breathed.

He shrugged, turning back to the boxes of bottles. “Got here about an hour ago. Didn’t want to interrupt you.”

Nyx was reaching for her, so he unclipped the carrier and gave him to her. He giggled happily as soon as he was in Nesta’s arms, but she froze, unsure of what to say. “You should have let me know you were here.”

Another shrug. “You were busy, and I knew what I needed to do. Kal said Viv would be here later to watch him.”

She nodded, silence filling the space again.

Nyx pointed at Cassian, reaching for him. “Dada.”

Cassian stilled.

He opened his mouth to say something, then closed his mouth.

A second passed.

Then, at last, he said, “What did he just say?”

“Dada,” Nyx repeated, and clapped his hands together. He reached for Cassian. “Dada!”

Cassian took Nyx, although he was moving slowly, stunned into silence. Nesta watched as a thousand different emotions crossed his face.

“Dada?” Cassian breathed, looking from Nyx to Nesta. “He just called me-.”

“He’s been saying it for the past two days,” Nesta said, staring at a spot on the wall behind Cassian.

For a moment, Cassian didn’t say anything, but then he asked, “You didn’t bother to tell me that?”

Nesta’s eyes narrowed and she slowly met his gaze. “You left.”

“A simple text letting me know that Nyx said his first word wouldn’t’ve killed you,” Cassian snapped. “Especially since his first word was…” Cassian shook his head, that fury fading as quickly as it had come. He looked at Nyx and chuckled, softly. “Dada, hmm?”

“Dada,” Nyx said, taking Cassian’s face into his hands before patting his stubbled cheeks with his chubby little palms.

Cassian watched Nyx for a moment, chuckling softly, before asking Nesta, “Has he said anything else?”

Nesta shook her head, even though Cassian wasn’t looking at her. “Just that. Probably wondering where you were. He’s been saying it nonstop, after all.”

“I’m sorry, bud,” he said, softly. He kissed the top of his head. “I’m still right here though.”

He was about to buckle him back into the carrier when Nesta reached for him. “I can take him. You’ve got a lot to do.”

“No more than you,” he said, settling him back into the carrier. “And I’ve missed him. Viv will come see Kallias when she gets here. Let me keep him.”

Her hands fell to her sides. “Fine.”

The tiny room felt like it was closing in on him, looking at her. They were so close together, whether they wanted to be or not. Without another word, Cassian grabbed the closest box and shouldered his way back through the swinging door.

Kallias caught the look on his face as soon as he came back. “That must have been the first conversation you two have had.”

Cassian grunted in response, letting Nyx continue to pat at his face.

“And how’d it go?” He asked, leaning against the bar.

“About as well as you think.”

Kallias watched his old friend for a moment before nodding, deciding to let the conversation drop. Cassian was grateful for it.

He was thankful for Nyx, too, for an endless amount of reasons, but right now, he was a distraction. With Nyx here, he was only thinking about Nyx, not about Nesta.

Cassian spent the next couple of hours lining up liquor bottles, and when Viv got there, she happily took Nyx and let Cassian work.

Once Nyx began playing with Viviane, Cassian’s thoughts were once again on the last person he wanted to be thinking about.

He continued to work, trying his best to keep his mind on that. It was kind of hard, though, when the owner of the restaurant was Nesta. He guessed he was part owner now, too - owner of the bar, anyway.

The hours flew by and by the time Cassian decided to check his watch, he realized he only had thirty minutes until the doors were opening for the main event.

He needed to get out of his old hoodie and into something nicer.

After making his way into the stockroom, he pulled off his hoodie before digging into his backpack for the black henley he’d brought. It wasn’t fancy by any means, but it was sure better than his ripped hoodie.

The door swung open as he was pulling his shirt over his head, and when he turned around, he saw Nesta, once again.

She stilled just in front of the door. “Are you planning on being in here every time I come in?”

It was meant to be a joke, something to lighten the mood, Cassian knew, but the light didn’t exactly reach her eyes.

He looked down at his shirt. “Just had to change. Didn’t think a hoodie was appropriate for an opening celebration.”

Nesta nodded, giving him a forced smile. “Couldn’t have gone all out with a button down?”

“This is Azriel’s,” he said. “All of my nicer things are at…home.”

He said the last word hesitantly.

Nesta’s eyes fluttered shut. He knew she was dying to say something, but what it was he couldn’t tell. He thought he knew her well enough to read her face. It seemed he was wrong though.

“I’ll come by and get my things on my day off this week,” he said, saving her the request. He pulled the Henley over his head, leaving his backpack against the store room wall. “You won’t even know I was there.”

“Cassian…”

He pushed back through the door without waiting to hear what she was going to say.

This was agony. Every moment of being around her hurt, because every time he saw her, he knew that he’d wasted the past three months of his life. He’d wasted his time falling in love with her, because she still hadn’t said it back.

“Dada!”

Nyx and Viv sat at one of the new tables, Nyx munching on some crackers, and even Kallias’ eyes dragged to him. Nyx’s blue eyes were the only ones he cared about though.

“That’s new,” Kallias said, from where he leaned across the bar.

Nyx’s new favorite word was one of the few things that had made him smile all day. Even if it tore him apart at the same time.

He didn’t mind Nyx calling him that. He was still too young to understand what had happened to Rhys. So one day, he’d explain to him who he really was, and who Rhys was. But until then, he was content to be Dada.

Cassian lifted him out of the high chair he was in and smiled, wistfully. “Hey, buddy.”

On the other side of the room, Nesta pushed through the double doors and into the restaurant, making sure everything was in order as the clock ticked down.

Cassian couldn’t keep his eyes off of her.

He wondered if she knew.

*

This was the biggest night that Nesta had in quite some time. A new bar would be amazing for business, and she was expecting a hell of a crowd.

And she wasn’t disappointed.

At exactly six, people began to pour in. They sat, and they ate, and by the Mother, they drank. She was amazed at how well Nyx was doing. She kept expecting to see him sleeping in a corner with Viviane, but he was being passed around to Viv, Kallias, Helion, and Cassian, having the time of his little life.

Nesta was glad someone was enjoying their night.

She should be enjoying her night, should be pumped at the booming business, but she could hardly focus.

All she could think about was him.

Cassian.

Every time she even got a glimpse of him, she wanted to run into his arms and tell him that she loved him. But she couldn’t do that. She had no clue what the repercussions of their relationship would do to Nyx, especially if something were to happen. If they were to break up, would this be their future? Barely speaking, passing the kid back and forth, both of them in misery?

Even when Elain and Azriel got there, both giving her hugs and warm smiles, the one on her face wasn’t real. She knew Elain could tell, knew she wanted to pull her aside, get the whole story, and quite possibly talk some sense into her, but she wouldn’t.

She couldn’t.

Not tonight.

As much as she tried to spend most of her time in the dining room, greeting guests and asking how they liked the drinks and new menu items, she kept ending up in the kitchen.

She got word that there had been a small grease fire on the line and she was about to rush into the kitchen when Helion stepped in front of her.

“Take a breath.”

“I can’t,” she replied, pulling her hair back off of her face. “There was a fire and-.”

“And it’s under control,” he said, gripping her by the shoulders. “It’s been put out, and I can go deal with Emrys and Luca and any potential fallout. Go have a drink, relax with your sister. You deserve a glass of wine and a moment to sit down.”

Nesta hesitated, but Helion wasn’t having it.

“Go,” he said. “Kallias is currently manning the bar. Go order a drink before the next wave of people come along.”

With a huff, Nesta nodded and exited the kitchen. True to Helion’s word, it was Kallias that was behind the bar. The second he saw Nesta coming, he was pouring a glass of wine.

She took a sip as soon as she reached the counter. “Vodka.”

Kallias blinked, then obliged her. He poured her a shot, Nesta downed it and thanked him, then took her glass of wine around the room to greet people. She eventually found Elain and Azriel, and was getting ready to take a seat by them, until she noticed Cassian already sitting with them, Nyx in his lap.

Bypassing their table, she gave them both an apologetic smile, before redirecting herself towards the bar. She breezed past it and Kallias, draining her wine and leaving it by the sink, before she entered the store room.

Cassian must have handed the baby off to Elain or Viviane, because not even a few seconds later, he was right behind her.

“Is this how it’s gonna be, Nes?” He asked, not stopping until he was right in front of her. “Are we just going to avoid each other, unless Nyx is concerned?”

The door hadn’t even finished swinging shut, but she noticed Kallias stacking a few boxes in front of the door.

For all intents and purposes, do not enter.

Their first night working together and already a fight. She couldn’t blame his frustration, this was all her fault.

“It hurts to see you,” she breathed. “It hurts to see you because I don’t know what the hell is going on.”

“You don’t know what the hell is going on?” He asked, incredulously. “I don’t know what the hell is going on! You’re so-.” His words fell away and his eyes shut as he rubbed his temples.

Nesta arched a brow. “I’m so what?”

“Infuriating,” he said, and met her eyes with a pained expression that knocked the breath out of Nesta. “It hurts for you to see me? It kills me to see you, but you know what? That’s on you. I wasn’t the one that started questioning everything. And you want to know what’s ironic? You’re pushing me away because you’re afraid it won’t work out. But, it’s not working now, Nesta. In pushing me away, you made what you’re worried about a reality.” He shook his head, slowly. “What the hell is the point of that?”

Nesta didn’t say anything. Her jaw locked and she refused to break his gaze, no matter how much it tortured her.

“It’s better for it to happen now rather than later,” she said, and hated herself for it the second the words left her. “It’s better for it to end before it really begins.”

Cassian chuckled, humorlessly, and shook his head. “That's bullshit and you know it. It already began, Nesta.”

He took a step toward her, and in such a small room, it left very little space between them.

Nestas breath hitched, and judging by the way Cassian’s eyes flared, he definitely noticed.

“Tell me you don’t care about me, and it’s done. We’ll pretend these past few weeks never happened, and we can move on,” he whispered, and she could feel his breath fan over her face. “Tell me this all meant nothing to you, and it’s over.”

Her eyes flashed down to his lips before meeting his own. “I can’t do that.”

Cassian wasn’t sure who moved first. If he grabbed her face or if she leaned up and pressed her lips to his, but before he knew what was happening, he had her back pressed against the store room wall. Gods, it had only been a few days, but kissing her again, the feel of her lips on his, it felt like he hadn’t been able to breathe.

Her hands were clawing at his back and he found her thighs, lifting her up to wrap her legs around his waist. He hadn’t even noticed she’d changed into a loose, sundress but thanks to her own wardrobe change, there was very little fabric between them as she let go of him to fumble with his belt buckle and jeans.

There were no words necessary, not when they both needed the other as badly as they did.

Their lips never broke, that contact remained, hungrily, needily, as Nesta pulled Cassian’s cock out and, moving the thin scrap of fabric beneath her dress aside, he pushed himself up into her.

Nesta moaned into his mouth at the feeling of him filling her. He bit her lip, and that moan deepened as he began to thrust deep inside of her, over and over again.

There was no foreplay.

Foreplay wasn’t necessary, not this time.

Two days, two nights, had been far too long when they had become so accustomed to this same ritual every night, time and time again.

Cassian’s head fell back as he fucked her, relentlessly, then he met her lustful gaze. His forehead fell against hers as he slowed his pace. With a soft, reverent curse, Cassian breathed her name.

She clung to him, the smell and taste and feel of him making her feel far more drunk than the wine or liquor had. Nesta buried her face in his neck, trying to cover the sounds tumbling from her.

He captured her lips again, knowing her body better than his own at this point, and thrust into her as hard as he could.

The bottles on the shelves rattled gently, but he didn’t care if anyone could hear them in the bar. He didn’t care if anyone caught them. All he cared about was that he was deep inside of her, listening to the quiet whimpers and moans that she couldn’t stop.

There was no way she could walk away from this.

Not just from the sex. Which, yeah, was incredible, but there was more to it than that.

Their souls were connected, which is what made the sex so mindblowingly phenomonal.

It was more than just sex.

It was something that Cassian swore no one else had ever witnessed before. Or, maybe they had. Maybe this is what it felt like when you found the person you were meant to spend forever with.

No, Nesta couldn’t walk away from this.

He swore, hoped, prayed she couldn’t.

He wanted to say those little words. Wanted to tell her, so desperately, that he loved her, but he didn’t.

He just kept saying her name over and over and over again with every thrust of his hips.

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

“Nesta,” he breathed, and she cried out as her legs began to shake around him. He cursed, his fingers digging into her thighs as his body flooded with the need to explode.

As soon as her release slammed into her, he met his own, her name a groan as he spilled into her. They stayed like that for a moment, him still buried inside her, even as his seed started to drip down her legs. Thankfully, the sound of the party out front had covered any and all noises they’d made. Her breathing was still uneven as he pulled out, and he pulled that ripped hoodie from his backpack and silently used it to clean her up.

Tossing it back towards his bag, not caring if it made it inside or not, he paused in front of her, and tried to tilt her face up to his.

She refused.

He breathed, “Look at me, Nes…”

She shook her head, and damn him if those weren’t tears starting to spill down her cheeks.

He gripped her chin, forcing her eyes up to meet his. “Damn it, Nesta, talk to me. Just talk to me and tell me what you’re thinking.”

“I think you need to go,” she breathed.

He hesitated. “What?”

“You need to go,” she repeated, but there was no bite in her voice.

Cassian took her face in his hands and brought her eyes to his. “I’m not leaving. Not after that.”

“Go,” she repeated, and another tear slid free. “Go, Cass, please.”

He shook his head, fury, frustration, utter misery filling his core. He dropped his hand and stepped back. “Damn it, Nesta! What do you want?!”

“For you to leave,” she hissed.

“You’re a fucking liar,” Cassian snapped. “You say you can’t tell me that you never cared, you fuck me in a damned store room, then you ask me to leave?”

“You’re making this harder than it has to be.”

“I’m making this harder?” he asked, breathlessly, unable to stop his darkened laughter. He looked away from her and sucked in his bottom lip.

A moment passed, and Cassian refused to meet her gaze. “I don’t get it,” he said, at last. “I don’t get it. I don’t know what you want. I don’t know what you want from me.” His words were coming out rushed, frazzled. “Know what? Fine. If this is the way you want it, this is the way it is. I’ll be at Elain’s and Azriel’s tonight, and I’m taking Nyx with me. I’ll bring him by tomorrow, when Viviane is there.”

With that, he was gone.

And Nesta was left alone, her hands flying over her mouth as she sobbed, still able to feel the soft, tender, alluring feeling of his lips on hers.

#snacmc lawki #snacmc collab #snelbz tacmc collab #life as we know it #nessian #acotar #acomaf #acowar #acofas #acosf

[danniburgh]

Give you what you want (Javier Peña x f!reader x Horacio Carrillo)

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader x Horacio Carrillo

Summary: You’ve been crushing hard on Javier - and Colonel Carrillo. And when they both find out about it, they can’t help but indulge you.

Word count: +11.1k

Chapter warnings: mild angst, mentions of violence, divorce talk, discussion of polyamorous relationship. OT3 SMUT, oral (m and f receiving), fingering, double penetration, alcohol, a lot of cum lol

A/N: this is a collab between me, @maharani-radha-writes​ and @queenofthefaceless, okay, yes this is a repost (basically the blog in which this os was posted blocked me). originally posted on april 6th 2021

ao3 // Masterlist // ko-fi

comments and reblogs are eternally appreciated 💓

Carrillo slammed his face on the steering wheel of his car with a groan. He had just spent all day in court finalizing his divorce—which had been going on for months—and just as he had gotten home, he realized that he had forgotten his service pistol at the office. Something he was not allowed to bring in the courtroom.

Fuckers.

He had separation anxiety from it, so even though he had multiple spares in the house, he had one trusty weapon, and he wouldn’t be caught dead without it. He glanced at the clock, and saw that it was only eight o’clock, so it wasn’t too late for him to swing back to base and grab it. Shaking his head, he turned the ignition of his car back on and reversed out of his driveway to head back to the station.

When he got there, he used his keys to enter through the back doorway, not really wanting to have to greet the guards at the front. He was just… way too done with people that day. Although he and his by then ex-wife had separated amicably (or as amicably as it could get), the divorce had taken a huge toll on him. He and Juliana had separated about five months before, and he had spent that time sitting in lawyers’ conference rooms, arguing over this and that. He was ready to just give her everything and anything she wanted if it meant he could get that painful process over with.

Truth be told, Carrillo was lonely. He had been for a long time, even while he was still married to Juliana. They had been less of a married couple and more like roommates for the past year at least, and it was getting to them both. His job was tough and dangerous–Juliana didn’t understand a lot of it. To be fair, he kept most of it from her, but that got exhausting after a while. He longed to just...let go, and he couldn’t do that with her. And after a while, she had decided that staying married to him (and his job) was more trouble than it was worth. He couldn’t blame her, not one bit.

It didn’t matter any more. He had firmly closed that chapter of his life, and was ready to move on. He didn’t know what the future looked like for him, but the only thing that he was sure of was that Pablo Escobar would be dead. He would make sure of it–even if he died trying.

After finding his service pistol, which had been stuffed in a holster under his desk, Carrillo closed the door to his office, and proceeded to walk down the hallway to the back exit. But he stopped when he heard voices coming from the bullpen.

Odd.

He hadn’t seen anyone when he had come in. He turned slightly and strained his ears to try to see if he could discern who it was. Then he heard the distinct Southern American drawl of none other than Steve Murphy. The man had been pulling late nights in the office ever since his wife got up and left him.

“All right, kiddo, care to tell me what the fuck your problem is?”

Who–? Was “kiddo”? It certainly couldn’t be Peña. It was a Friday night, surely Peña was off….doing something (or someone) else.

“What’s my problem? What’s your problem, Murph?”

Oh, it was you. The lone female agent of the DEA. Carrillo had been quite wary of you when you had joined the team about a year before. He really wasn’t sure what, if anything, you would be bringing to the table. And he thought that having two DEA agents was two too many already. But over time, you had proven to be a strong, capable, and intelligent partner, and his respect for you had grown.

Bringing you to Colombia had been a good decision, on the part of your superiors.

Now that he had identified the two people still stuck in the base, he should have been satisfied and been on his way. But something about Steve’s tone of voice kept him rooted to the spot. He really, really shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, especially since he was sure that it was a conversation he was not meant to hear.

“You’re on edge. A lot more than usual,” Steve said, “What’s going on?”

“Nothing, Steve. Just drop it,” you grumbled.

“Oh, so there is something?” Steve snarked, “Look, I normally would back off and leave you alone, but you’ve been highly distracted lately. And it’s affecting your work. I need to know what’s up or at least confirm that you’re going to get this resolved soon because we need your head in the game.”

Now that Steve mentioned it, Carrillo had noticed that you were...not yourself. And you hadn’t been for a while. But Carrillo was too caught up in his own drama to give it much of a thought.

“I’m sorry,” you sighed, “I’ll try not to be so scatterbrained. I’ll fix it, I promise.”

“Is this what I think it is? The thing you told Connie that I’m not supposed to know about?” Steve asked.

Carrillo knew he absolutely needed to leave. That was not a conversation he should be listening to. But he just could not help it.

“You’re going to have to be more specific, Steve. I’ve told Connie a lot of things,” you chuckled, nervously.

“I mean about–” there was a pause, presumably Steve looking around to check that nobody was there, “–your feelings. For, uh, ya know, Peña?”

Oh. That was news.

“And–uh–Carrillo I think?” Steve continued.

Wait...what?

Carrillo whipped his head around so fast that he winced as his neck twinged in protest. Since when...since when did you have feelings? For him? And Peña? What was happening? Someone needed to shoot him because that could not be real.

“Must you say it aloud?” you hissed.

“I’m sorry, kiddo, I don’t mean to embarrass you,” Steve apologized, “And normally I would mind my own fucking business, but this is getting out of hand. You really don’t think I notice the cows’ eyes you make at Peña when he’s not looking?”

“I don’t do that!” you denied, indignantly.

“Okay fine, maybe that’s a bit dramatic,” Steve conceded, “But the point still stands. You definitely need to get this fixed. Have you thought, oh I don’t know, telling Peña? Or even Carrillo?”

“Are you crazy?” you stammered, “Do you have any idea what that would do to my career? Not to mention that Carrillo is...fucking married?”

“Well, he’s divorced now,” Steve clarified, “And nobody has to know. It’s nobody else’s business but yours. I’m just saying, think about it ok? You deserve an outlet, just like everyone else.”

Carrillo decided that it was best to not stay and hear what you had to say to that. Instead, he hightailed it out of the base, as quickly as he could, trying to keep his footsteps light so as not to alert you and Steve to his presence. Once he was finally in the safety of his car, he put his head back onto the seat and let out a long breath, trying to figure out what he was going to do with that information. He couldn’t deny that the idea of you having feelings for him was incredibly flattering. You were a very guarded individual and quite hard to read sometimes–not so dissimilar to him. He would have never, in a million years, guessed that you would be interested in him, and that was mostly due to your closed off persona.

But to find out that you had feelings for both him and Peña? That was an interesting development. Carrillo didn’t know how to feel about that. But he can’t deny that it intrigued him...more than it should have. His mother would be completely mortified if she found out that he was entertaining this--whatever it was.

But his mother was not here. His wife was gone, and had taken the kids with her. It was just him, and his large house. And now, apparently, you and possibly Peña. Carrillo tilted his head contemplatively and started the ignition of his car.

Maybe...just maybe, there was something to this whole charade.

**Scene Break 1**

Steve was tired. Scratch that, he was exhausted. Not physically, but mentally.

Javier had been looking at you for far too long, and Steve could taste the yearning and the tension that lingered around the office when Peña looked at you. It was maddening, and Steve had no idea how Peña had managed this long without jumping you. After all, he never seemed to have a problem getting a woman’s attention and keeping it. So, why were you so different?

And the worst part of this whole circus is that you were so blissfully unaware of it. It made Steve’s mouth foam with rage.

When he told Connie over the phone, the previous night, what you had said to him and how you had confessed to being attracted to both men, she actually convinced him to talk to Javi on your behalf. Because Connie knew you, and she knew you would just shut up about it, guard it as if you were a dragon with a treasure, never say a thing, and suffer in silence until your feelings went away. And if they didn’t. Too bad. Steve hadn’t wanted to get involved. After all, you were an adult, and Javier was an adult. You should be able to sort these things out yourself. But alas, that had not happened. And if Steve didn’t do something about it, it was going to get out of hand, quickly.

So when you got up from your desk and got out of the office, Steve walked to Javier and slammed his hand on a pile of files that Javier was almost hiding behind.

“Yes, Murphy, how can I help you?” Peña drawled, trying to keep his voice as even and unaffected as possible.

“Don’t give me that innocent bullshit, Peña,” Steve growled, “I’m so sick of you.”

“What could I have possibly done now?” Javier huffed, pulling a cigarette out of his pack and lighting it. He figured that if he played dumb, Steve would go away.

Alas.

“You, and her,” Steve said, emphasizing his point by jabbing his finger in the direction of the door you had just walked out of, “There’s something between the two of you. Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed.”

Javier decided not to answer that. Instead he just took a puff of his cigarette and stared at Steve, daring him to continue.

“I’m serious Peña, stop playing coy. This is starting to affect your working relationship, and I’m getting sick of it,” Steve grumbled, “Do something about it. Now.”

It took a few moments of silence, but Javier finally decided to concede to Steve. Truth was, Javier’s head was full of thoughts. Full of you. Truth be told, getting infatuated with you was just a matter of time.

You were just… frustratingly attractive, incredibly strong and so damn smart. A dangerous combination, you were almost perfect. And that, scared the shit out of him. It had been a long time since Javier felt like that; he didn’t like the vulnerability of it all, he didn’t like how it was way too apparent that whatever you did, for small that it was, affected him in some way. He didn’t like the fact that he wanted to be with you all the time, see you all the time, talk to you all the time. He wanted to protect you all the time even when he knew you could perfectly protect yourself. And he had been feeling like that for months.

Javier interpreted that as karma, getting so madly, deeply into you and getting absolutely nothing in return. Until Steve chimed in, nosy as ever, to speak about something that was clear as a water drop but he just kept denying from himself.

He replayed what Steve had told him while he puffed from his cigarette and for a split second, and let himself smile at the words of his partner.

Steve was right. He was aware of how much he had been missing and how affected his job seemed to be because of how much time he spent thinking about you. It was so unlike him, and it was very unprofessional. But he just couldn’t help it.

You and your strikingly beautiful being. You letting him hold you close. You, with your hands on him. You and how sweet your lips must taste. You and how your naked body must look in the dimmed lights of his bedroom. Fuck.

So he decided, after his partner all but scolded him about being too dumb to realize, that he was going to face you and just… make things happen.

Steve smiled to himself while looking down at a file when Javier stood up from his own desk and walked out of the office.

“Attaboy,” he mumbled to himself.

**Scene Break 2**

You weren’t sure what it was, but suddenly the air in that bullpen had become oppressive, and you just needed to get out. Well, frankly...you weren’t stupid. You knew what was causing you to feel this way. It was stupid Steve and his stupid way of being right all the time, how the fuck did he do that? At some point, you were going to have to tell Javier (and possibly Carrillo, as well) how you felt, but if you could put it off for longer, you were absolutely going to do so.

You sat on the concrete wall bordering the police base, observing quietly as the citizens of Medellín went about their day, getting lunch and catching up with their colleagues. There was a man selling arepas just a few feet from you, and the smell was amazing. But no matter how tantalizing the scent was, you just couldn’t bring yourself to eat. All you needed was some air. Yeah, that’s what you needed. You’d be fine after a few moments.

Unfortunately, your peace wasn’t to last long, and as you were soon to discover, your observational skills would need a check up because Colonel Horacio Carrillo himself had just plopped himself next to you, and you hadn’t even noticed. Carrillo, for his part, waited a few moments before clearing his throat, startling you from your thoughts, and successfully getting your attention.

Ah shit.

One of the exact men that you didn’t want to deal with right now was sitting right next to you.

Joy.

“Those arepas look fantastic,” he remarked in that lovely accent you really liked, “Do you want one?”

You shook your head.

“No thank you,” you mumbled, “I’m fine.”

Carrillo hummed.

“I’m sure we could find something else if you would prefer. There’s all kinds of food in Medellín,” he replied. But you refused again.

“No, really, I’m fine. I don’t want any food,” you said.

Carrillo tilted his head and clasped his hands together, leaning forward slightly. He gave a small, almost imperceptible smirk, and if you didn’t know him so well, you would have missed it.

“I see,” he observed, amusedly, “So, then, Agent. What do you want?”

You frowned, and furrowed your eyebrows. What...what was he doing?

“I–I don’t want anything,” you replied, completely flabbergasted.

“Hmmm,” Carrillo began, “I don’t believe you. I think you want something.”

You raised your eyebrows at that. You’d never known the Colonel to be so bold.

“I want Escobar dead,” you quipped, “Same as you, I suppose.”

“Ah yes, I certainly want that,” Carrillo agreed, “But I want something else. Something that I imagine might be the same as you.”

You scratched the back of your neck, nervously, not sure where this was going.

“All right, Colonel, I’ll bite. What is it that you want?” you questioned.

Carrillo adjusted his position on the wall, turning so that he was facing you squarely. He looked you straight in the eyes before taking a deep breath, as if he was working up the courage to say something.

“You.”

You felt the air leave your lungs, Carrillo’s face was a puzzle laid before you but before you could say something else, you heard a deep, timbered voice calling your name.

You reluctantly turned around and saw Peña walking up to the both of you, you felt Carrillo shift beside you and let out a sigh, as if he knew something like that would happen.

“I was looking for you,” Javier mumbled, almost as if he didn’t want anyone else to hear but you.

“So, you found me,” your voice was shaky after the Colonel’s admission, and you tried to control it “What?”

“Can we–uh–talk?” he said, and you looked back at Carrillo.

“Can it wait?” you pleaded.

“No,” Javier declared.

“I think I know what this is about,” Carrillo announced, and you frowned at him, asking with your eyes for him to elaborate. But he just stayed quiet, looking between you and Peña.

“What do you mean?” Javier huffed, “This is a private conversation that I need to have with her.”

“I think we all need to have this conversation,” Carrillo mumbled, looking at the ground for half a second before returning his gaze to you and Javier.

“What are you two on?” you asked, frantically, “I am so confused.”

Javier glanced at the Colonel, at the way he was all but shifting around like a nervous kid. He realized Carrillo moved like he was hiding something, like he had a secret he so wanted to confess.

“Do you know something?” Javier questioned him, furrowing his brow. The Colonel turned to study him and there was a small moment in which they said nothing, and their eyes just locked.

And there, Javier saw him, as he was. Colonel Horacio Carrillo was an honorable man, everyone knew that, but as he was honorable he was dark, and Javier had a small suspicion of what he knew and was badly hiding.

Javier felt himself smirk at the man and Carrillo smirked back, and Javi knew it. Because he never misses things like that. For him is like having a sixth sense, somehow enhanced by his career and his experience. He just knows. Javier had never been indifferent to men. After all, being honest with himself, he had a little crush on Steve before he saw the wedding band. And Carrillo was… just his type. He never thought he would have the chance to even get closer to the Colonel like that. In the end, the time was not right and he was quite sure Carrillo wasn’t like that.

Clearly, he had been mistaken.

“Okay you two, I’ve had enough,” you grumbled, “What is going on? I’m sick of these games.”

“This is not a game,” Carrillo said, finally looking at you, you felt your frown get deeper.

“Then what is it?” you demanded.

Javier shrugged and took one last look at Carrillo, as if to confirm his consent, and replied.

“An arrangement,” he deadpanned, “With both of us.”

“If you want it,” Carrillo added, quickly.

You shot up from the wall you were sitting on and turned to glare at both of them. Javier put his hands on his waist and leaned on a leg, and Carrillo stood up as well, clasped hands in front of him, just waiting for you to say something. Anything.

Javier glanced nervously at Carrillo from the corner of his eye, searching his face for any sign of hesitation. I hope this is gonna go how you were planning, Carrillo, he thought, Because if it doesn’t and she refuses to speak to me again after this...I swear to god–

“Where did you get this idea?” you blabbered, feeling the sting of nervousness and insecurity settling into your stomach. Along with something else in your lower belly you refused to acknowledge at all.

Javier sighed, and shook his head.

“Steve Murphy has a big mouth,” he murmured.

“Dios mío,” you exclaimed, “He told you both?”

“Well, he told me,” Javier said, running a hand through his hair, “I don’t know about our Colonel over here.”

Now it was Carrillo’s turn to look sheepish.

“No, he didn’t say anything to me,” Carrillo admitted, “I overheard the two of you talking the other day.”

“You eavesdropped on me?” you gasped, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. Is nothing I say private?”

Carrillo at least had the grace to look ashamed.

“It was an accident,” he tried to assure you, “But–I don’t regret listening in. I haven’t stopped thinking about it. About you.”

You scrubbed your face with your hands, trying to figure out what you were going to do. It wasn’t that you were–unhappy–more so embarrassed. You’d been carrying this secret for a long time now, and to have it so out in the open made you feel more exposed than ever. And you hated the feeling.

“I’m gonna need a minute,” you said, “Can we talk about this later? I need some space.”

Without waiting for a response, you briskly walked away from the police base and in the direction of the city. You weren’t sure where you were going or when you were going to be back. All that you knew was that your privacy had been massively violated, and you needed some space to collect yourself. Alone. And perhaps when you had calmed down, you could think about Carrillo and Peña’s proposal, like a functioning adult. But right now, you were too embarrassed (and aroused, let’s be real), to think straight.

Javier turned aside to look at Carrillo when your figure had disappeared into the city.

“So,” Javier broke the not-so-awkward silence, “Are you okay with this?”

Carrillo huffed at the question and glanced at the agent, noticing in him things he hadn't noticed before.

“Are you?”

Javier felt his stomach drop at the Colonel’s question… interesting.

“I’m all in,” he replied, smirking at Carrillo.

“Yo también.”

**Scene Break 3**

It was later in the afternoon by the time you had calmed down enough to return to work. You couldn’t believe what had happened today. You absolutely wanted to smack Steve. What you had told him was in confidence, and he had broken that trust. But you couldn’t deny that you were happy with the result. The idea of having even just one of those two men was enough to get you going, but both?

Men like them?

The pool of arousal was already forming in between your legs.

You could not deny how much you had wanted this, and how much you had been dreaming about it. And for a very long time. For god’s sake, you had lost sleep over this shit. It made you feel dirty, filthy, unprofessional. But you just couldn’t help it. You’d done a decent enough job of keeping your feelings in check, but now the cat was out of the bag.

And not only did these two men know how you felt. Apparently, they felt the same way. And for some godforsaken reason, they wanted you.

Were you really going to say no to an opportunity like that? Were you truly that stupid? No matter how much you were angry with Steve.

Connie would lose her shit when you'd call her to tell her about her husband’s work.

You walked into the bullpen and saw the office door opened, the first thing you saw was Javier’s face buried inside a file, his posture rigid and his hands grasping at the folder as if it were a lifeline.

He looked up and his eyes went wide when he saw you walk in.

But then you saw Murphy, sitting like nothing had happened and you saw red. You rushed at him and without a word your hand flew and you smacked him on the back of the head.

“What the fuck?” he yelled, and you heard Javier laughing behind you.

“You asshole,” you hissed, “Exactly what made you think it was a good idea to tell him? I trusted you to keep your mouth shut.”

“Excuse me,” Steve groaned, rubbing the back of his head, “I did you a fucking favor. I got tired of hanging around with you two idiots, just looking at each other and not saying shit.”

“You should not have done that,” you growled, fixing him with what you hoped was your most intimidating glare.

“Perhaps not,” Steve shrugged, “But I don’t regret it.”

“Can I–say something?” Javier asked behind you.

“No. Shut up.” you hissed without looking back at him.

“You do something like this again, and I’ll kill you,” you threatened Steve before storming out of the base, and into the parking lot. You sat in the driver’s seat of your car and banged your head against the steering wheel. You had had every intention of finding Peña and Carrillo and taking them up on their offer, but now all feelings of boldness had been once again replaced by shame and embarrassment. No doubt you were the talk of the police base, what with your massive crush on two of your colleagues.

Although you knew it was irrational, you couldn’t help but feel as though Carrillo and Peña were making fun of you. You knew it was stupid. Both of them were grown-ass men. They wouldn’t be so immature. If they didn’t like you at all, they would have just left you alone. But you just couldn’t help the raging insecurity you were feeling. Perhaps if you had actually told both of them, directly, how you felt, rather than let Steve Murphy do the hard work, then maybe you wouldn’t be feeling this way.

But that was all water under the bridge now, you supposed.

Later that night, you were heating up a pitiful TV-dinner in your apartment, not feeling up to eating, but you needed something, when your phone rang. You froze with the fork halfway to your mouth. There were only a handful of people who had your landline number, and even then, only a few of those people would have the guts to actually call it. This wasn’t going to be a fun conversation.

Sighing, you trudged over to the phone and lifted the receiver to your ear.

“¿Sí?” you asked, quietly, and you heard the low voice of Colonel Carrillo on the other end.

“It’s me,” he said softly, “You left work rather abruptly. I called to see if you were fine.”

“As fine as I can be, given the circumstances,” you grumbled.

“I’m sorry that things transpired the way they did, truly,” Carrillo mumbled, sounding genuinely apologetic, “But I meant it when I said I don’t regret finding out.”

“Of course you wouldn’t,” you snarked, “You’re not the one whose colleague breached her trust.”

There was a pause before Carrillo spoke again.

“Do you regret it?”

Now it was your turn to pause, contemplating your words and how you would respond. You didn’t want to hurt him, but at the same time, you wanted to make it clear that you weren’t pleased with the means---even if the end was fantastic.

“I regret how this started,” you replied, slowly, not trusting yourself to say anything further.

Carrillo hummed over the line, contemplating your words.

“I can’t blame you for that,” he said, “But forget about Steve for a moment, please. Have you thought about it?”

You inhaled and held your breath for ten counts, trying to calm down your racing heart. You couldn’t deny that just the mere thought of being in the same room with these two men, especially in a non-platonic setting, was difficult for you.

“I think you know the answer to that, Colonel. You aren’t stupid,” you quipped, “Have you discussed this with Peña? I must admit, I am surprised at you both. This doesn’t seem like something either of you would be interested in.”

“We’ve discussed this, absolutely,” Carrillo said, recalling the deeper conversation he had with Peña earlier that day after you had slapped Steve, “I think we’ve both surprised ourselves, if I’m being honest. But if the attraction is there, it’s there. But I want you to know, there is no pressure. This only goes as far as you want it to go.”

You frowned at that.

“What do you mean?” you pressed.

“Querida,” he sighed, “What happens between the three of us–well–Peña and I know where we stand–it’s up to you now. If you don’t want this, then just say the word. We’ll pretend this conversation never happened.”

You took a shuddering breath and tried to respond as best as you can.

“I–”

“You don’t have to give me an answer now,” Carrillo interrupted gently, “Think about it. Make sure it’s what you want. Then you can let us know.”

“I–ok,” you stuttered, for lack of a better response.

“I should leave you to your evening. But think about it, and let me know what you decide ,” Carrillo said, “Have a good night, querida.”

“Sure, good night, Colonel,” you mumbled, hearing the click on the other end, indicating that Carrillo had hung up.

You passed the rest of the evening in relative silence, going about your mundane business with an extra air of heaviness. Slowly you could feel the embarrassment from the day give way to desire. As you lay by yourself in your bed, clutching at your pillow, you couldn’t help the acute sense of loneliness that you felt. After all, you hadn’t really had anyone before you came to Colombia, and your job here certainly killed whatever chance of having a relationship you might have had. It was why you had so easily fallen for both of your colleagues.

You were lonely. And they were lonely too. But it wasn’t just out of loneliness. You’d seen what Peña was like when he just wanted to have a warm body next to him. Just as it had taken courage for you to confess how you felt to Steve, it must have taken just as much strength for Carrillo and Peña to admit the same to you. This wasn’t going to be a one time thing–born out of isolation and tragedy–it would be something much more meaningful than that. You could feel it.

You glanced at the clock, seeing that it was just past midnight. Although you knew that Carrillo usually stayed up late, you didn’t want to bother him, so you dialed the number of the only other person who you knew would be up this late.

“Hello?” Javier Peña gruffed on the other end, clearly annoyed at having been woken up.

“Javier, it’s me,” you said, by way of greeting. You heard some rustling of bedsheets, no doubt Javier was fully awake now.

“Are you all right?” he asked, concern coloring his tone.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you assured him, “I just–I’ve thought about your offer. Yours and Carrillo’s.”

You heard a sharp intake of breath over the phone.

“And what do you say, cariño?” he questioned, hope ringing in his voice.

You took a deep breath, steadying yourself.

“Yes. I’m saying yes.”

**Scene Break 4**

You sat inside Javier’s car, silently, as he drove the two of you through the streets of Medellín towards Carrillo’s address. It was a Friday–exactly a week from when Carrillo had overheard you talking to Steve, and you were completely floored at how your life had changed that fast. You didn’t regret anything though, not one bit.

You were nervous though. Having one of these men was enough to make you swoon, but both? You weren’t sure what was going to happen. All you knew is that it would be a fantastic night. You just hoped that you could keep up.

A hand on your knee brought you back to the present, and you glanced over to see that Javier was eyeing you out of the corner of his eye as he drove.

“Relax, cariño,” he ordered, “It’s just us.”

You laughed.

“I know, that’s what I’m worried about,” you said, jokingly. But Javier wasn’t having it.

“Why would that make you nervous?” he asked, turning to face you when you had stopped for a red light.

“You two are my friends and colleagues,” you stated, “I don’t–want to disappoint you. Especially since we will have to go back to work after the weekend.”

Javier shook his head and pressed down harder on the accelerator, hoping that if he got you to Carrillo’s place faster, you’d stop your fatalistic thoughts.

“None of that,” he grumbled, shutting down your line of thinking as quickly as he could, “What happens between us tonight stays between us. That’s it. No pressure or expectations. Just enjoy yourself, okay?”

You nodded, not quite trusting yourself to speak. And thankfully, you didn’t have to say anything because you and Javier finally pulled up in front of Carrillo’s house. It was a much larger property than you had expected, with a beautifully-kept lawn and a mango tree just at the front of the house. It was a stunning place to live, and the thought that Carrillo had been staying there alone, with nobody to share it with, for the past several months just left you heartbroken.

Well. That was likely about to change tonight.

“You’re still sure, cariño?” Javier asked, taking your hand in his and staring at your knuckles, “If you’ve changed your mind, I can drive you back now. No questions asked.”

You shook your head.

“I’m completely sure, Javi. Don’t worry,” you assured him, and Javier nodded.

“Bueno,” he mumbled, “Let’s go.” And with that, the two of you walked up the path to Carrillo’s front door and rang the bell. Carrillo answered almost immediately, face relaxing at the sight of you.

“I hope you didn’t have too much trouble finding the place,” he greeted, stepping back to allow the two of you to enter his house.

“I have some wine if you would like,” Carrillo suggested, leading you and Javier into the kitchen after the two of you had kicked off your shoes.

Carrillo walked straight to the fridge and took out what appeared to be a pretty expensive brand of wine, but neither you nor Javier said anything in regards to it. Instead, you both sat down and exchanged a series of fugitive glances at each other.

You thought you needed the wine, the bitter, strong taste of alcohol to run through your veins in order to be able to process the moment in its entirety. But suddenly, as you glared at both Javier and Carrillo, there was no need for anything else. No liquid distraction to be drunk beforehand, no ridiculous and meaningless pleasantries or comfort words. You knew those men. You trusted them with your life every day when you went out there on the streets, and you trusted them just as much now. Their mere presence was sufficient to relax you and ease the tension, although you thought they would both agree that the tension was thicker than you could’ve imagined.

“I trust you both, and I care about you both, so damn much.”

It came out of the blue; you weren’t even sure you thought about it in your mind, and yet you said it nonetheless, standing up. Both of them seemed a little surprised by your impromptu confession, but patiently waited for your continuation, if there was any to begin with.

“What I mean is… why make this harder on ourselves? Why bother with small talk and awkward conversations when we can just… do it, enjoy the night?”

Javier was the first one who smirked. And of course he would, he was probably used to a lot of those moments, or similar ones, and had almost no issue baring it all, you thought. You swore, for a brief, almost too rushed moment, that you saw Carrillo hesitate with saying something and averting his eyes from both you and Javier, but you brushed it off. Instead, he looked tall and mighty at you, as his official position required, and smiled gallantly at you.

“You are the one in charge tonight,” he told you.

Simple, yet effective.

From the moment you heard that sentence, it did something to your ego. It gave you an unexpected boost of confidence, it sparked a desire, a flame so bright and hot you wouldn’t have believed it to be true in any other situation.

You took a few steps closer to Carrillo, all the while having Javier watch the scene unfold from the kitchen entrance. He stood up when you did, out of some long-forgotten courtesy that he didn’t used to care about anymore, and he just knew where it was all headed. He recognized the look in your eyes, the longing on your face. He knew what it meant, how much it must’ve consumed you, and he felt oddly enticed and captivated by it.

Just as swiftly as the night began, Carrillo’s hands rested on your waist while he kissed you. You wrapped your arms around his neck and he only brought you closer to him; his lips tasted surprisingly sweet, with just a faint tint of nicotine. Your chest was pressed against his, warm clothed skin found yours and you shivered against him. His hands gripped your waist as if saying farewell to them and he slid them up your body. You could feel Peña’s eyes fixed in your bodies, staring at the scene, and when the Colonel broke the kiss to nibble at your neck, you opened your eyes to see him next to you; half-lidded brown deep eyes, an opened bottle of wine in one hand and his lower lip in the other. Your skin was burning, and you had barely been touched.

You smiled at him when Carrillo took your jacket off, Peña smirked and took a sip of wine directly from the bottle, careless about any pleasantries.

Carrillo’s wet tongue latched softly at your pulse point and ripped a low moan out of you, you closed your eyes again when his hands gripped your ass over the fabric of your jeans.

“Colonel, please,” you muttered, sighing as you felt his large hands had fun with your flesh and grip it after hearing the way you called him.

“Words, querida” he just replied, putting some distance between your wet skin and his lips.

“More,” you bit your lip, Carrillo smirked at you and you noticed the way his eyes darkened with desire in front of you. He turned to look at Javier, who was still standing at the kitchen entrance, palming his erection over his jeans.

“Bring that,” Carrillo said, pointing at the bottle, then slid his hand from your ass to the small of your back and guided you towards the staircase.

Between your hazed eyes and the cloud of lust that had begun to invade your mind you looked around Carrillo’s space and wondered how a man like him could live in a place that big. You smiled to yourself when he put his hand on the small of your back and soon enough Peña caught up to you, you felt his ever so imposing presence behind you.

Carrillo opened the door to the bedroom and pushed you softly inside.

You didn’t even have time to take your surroundings in when you felt a pair of warm hands find your hips and a set of lips grazing at your earlobe. Your eyes closed by themselves and the sweet, strong smell of Javier’s cologne invaded your nostrils as he pulled your back flush against his chest.

“Sh–shit,” you let out, half a whisper, half a moan, when you felt Carrillo’s hands roam around your waist.

You were losing yourself between the touch of the two of them, you shivered when Carrillo cupped your breast as Javier nibbled at the skin of your neck, from behind, you tilted your head to the side to give him more room to do whatever–the–fuck he pleased with your neck.

“Mírate, chiquita,” Carrillo whispered, you felt his breath on your lips and when you re-opened your eyes you saw him inches away from your face “you’re already wrecked.”

You felt Javier chuckling against your flushed skin, and you bit your lower lip, bringing a hand to the Colonel’s nape to pull him closer and kiss him again.

One of Javier’s hands found itself under your shirt, his mouth was moving and his other hand pulled softly at your shirt over your shoulder to find more skin to lick and kiss. Carrillo found the hem of your shirt and broke the kiss to look at you, as if asking for permission and reassurance that you wanted what he wanted. Javier watched the silent exchange and smirked against the skin of your shoulder, he gave it a last brush of his mustache and a last kiss before you nodded to the Colonel and he helped you out of the garment.

Carrillo smiled to himself when he saw what you’ve been hiding under it, a black, only-lace bra that showed the shade of your nipples, you bit your lip again when you took in his disheveled figure, his notorious erection under his military green pants that made the pool between your legs grow.

“How are you this fucking beautiful?” Javier muttered behind you, his mouth leaving a trail of kisses behind your ear to your nape.

Your breath hitched when Carrillo kneeled in front of you and you felt your chest heaving with desire when his large fingers dextrely unbuttoned your jeans and his thumbs hooked on the hem. He looked at you again and you nodded for a second time. Javier looked over your shoulder at the Colonel slowly sliding your jeans off your hips then your legs and he left his hands roam around the now naked skin of your torso. Your hands landed on the back of his head, and he took the hint, attacking the skin of your neck once again.

Carrillo threw your jeans away once he helped you out of them and you moaned loudly when his lips grazed against your knee. One of your hands dropped to grab Carrillo’s head as his trail of kisses moved up, up, up until he reached the soft skin where your thigh and your hip joined. You were sure he could smell your arousal, you were sure he could feel it at that point and you didn’t care, for once you let yourself only feel and let all thought out of your mind while you felt two mouths, two men, take care of you.

There was no hesitation from Javier’s side as his fingers gently grazed up your spine, expertly unclasping your bra, taking in the image of the straps loosening on your smooth skin. He was damn near panting at the mere sight, but he had to remind himself that that was only the tip of the iceberg. The moans you were letting escape your mouth as Carrillo pressed gentle kisses on your inner thighs aided him in no way. He felt himself get harder and harder and fought off raging instincts to turn that moment into another one of his one-night stands.

Javier made sure he tasted your skin while he took the straps from both sides between his fingers and slid them off your shoulders, he felt you shivering under his hands and over Horacio’s mouth and you could feel the smirk on your skin, once the bra came off, Javier took your chin and moved your head to face him, he pressed his mouth on yours, his tongue hungry for your scent, invading your cavities and feeling your warmth rush through his body with the speed of light. Everything about your scent was intoxicating and consuming, and ever so addicting that he could barely find it in himself to stop.

But then his calloused hands found your breasts and oh–oh, shit.

That first squeeze, tantalizingly slow and powerful, took you out completely. You gasped, and you weren’t sure if it was Horacio’s warm breath in between your legs or Javier fondling your breasts, but you embraced the overwhelming effect both had on you. Javier squeezed again, and moved around to locate the sweet torture of his mouth onto your nipples, taking one in his mouth whilst his thumb moved over the other one, twisting it in between his fingers as he nibbled at your skin. His tongue left a glistening trail as he peppered kisses in between your breasts, moving up your sternum, collarbones and neck and focusing on one particular spot that seemed to drive you wild. So much so that you reached behind your back to grab a handful of his hair, pull him in closer however you could.

“Lay her down, Peña,” Carrillo cooed, and the man followed suit.

You saw the Colonel untuck his shirt and take it off while Javier kneeled on the bed and helped you lay down on it, the softness of the sheets embraced you and the coldness made you whimper softly.

It was a premiere for him to witness Javier Peña, of all people, being so submissive and attentive, but he had other matters to focus on at the moment. His mouth left your already glistening and plump lips to grab the bottle of wine, your eyes followed him as you felt Carrillo’s hands spread your legs open and kiss the inside of your legs again, Javier came back to the bed and kneeled next to you, his hand gripping the bottle and the other cupping your face, he smiled softly at you and took a sip from the bottle; you moaned when Carrillo’s hands worked to get you out of your lace panties and Javier leaned down to you, the hand that cupped your face moved to your chin and he opened your mouth with his thumb, letting the wine pour from his mouth to yours, the wine was warm and it tasted sweet, when you closed your mouth and swallowed, Javier’s thumb grazed your lips and you heard a hard pant next to you, you turned to see Carrillo’s lusted face, you gave him a soft smile and he all but threw himself to you, kissing your mound, you moaned again and Javier leaned back, bringing the chilled bottle closer to your body, letting the tip of it graze against your warm skin, between the cold sensation and Carrillo’s lips tasting you, you were about to scream, Javier looked at you, smirked and pour some of the wine all over your breasts and abdomen, immediately reaching down on your again to lick the liquid off. A bit of the wine had traveled down your abdomen to your lower belly and found its way into Carrillos mouth, the feeling of the cold wine and their tongues made you growl. You had two pairs of equally sinful and skilled lips teasing and licking deliciously well over your exposed skin, and you had half of mind to grab either one of them and get to business. You couldn’t recall the last time you felt so aroused, but it was all a masterful torture and all for a good time. If anyone else was allowed to have their downtime, why shouldn’t you?

It was somewhat futile to even attempt to please either one of the men in return; their own pleasure seemed to be revolving around yours and they were both doing such an incredible job out of it that you had a hard time trying to keep track of where did the waves of pleasure come from anymore. It was all one big tsunami of feelings, from overstimulation to lust and appreciation and love in some form.

Carrillo continued his ministrations while Javier licked the remains of the wine from your body, his tongue traveled to your sternum and he took a nipple on his mouth ever so briefly, then he stood up and quickly undressed, not bothering to be cool about it, he just threw his clothes to the floor while he looked at Horacio have the time of his life between your legs, you let out soft moans and whispers and while Javier took off his jeans he saw your hand grip Carrillo’s hair as your hips hatched against the Colonel’s face. You felt his tongue flicking your clit and he pushed a thick finger inside you, curling it around, building you up and throwing you off the cliff with the same force he had put you there. You came on his mouth with his name on yours.

As you laid on the bed, legs spread for Carrillo as he helped you ride off your orgasm, Javier kneeled back on the bed next to your face, his hand snaked its way around your neck, gently grabbing both sides and helping you take his erection in your mouth, which you were more than happy to do. You could tell he was somewhat tensed: he was doing his absolute best to control his motions and to keep it at a normal rhythm, but the more you involuntarily groaned as Carrillo began to glide his tongue across your slit once again, building up your second climax, the more Javier was slowly losing bits and pieces of himself. Within seconds, you could just tell you weren’t gonna last long, but neither would Javier as he picked up the face and jerked his hips forward more and more, thus obliging you to take more of him in. You couldn’t explain it, nor find any logic behind the action itself, but you swore you felt his release in Javier’s impatient thrusts and, sure enough, mere seconds later, he finally came, grunting as ropes of his seed dripped down your jaw.

Your moans returned when Carrillo added two fingers to his mouthy torture over your clit, and you felt like you could explode. Not long after that all-too familiar gut feeling, that almost persistent desire to burn, you came for a second time, eager to jerk your hips forward and meet as much as you could of Carrillo’s tongue, but this time, the man’s grip over your thighs was impossible to break. He held you in place ever so expertly and ate you out like you were his favorite five course meal, soaking up every ounce of juice that you provided him with.

You temporarily lost feeling in your arms as you tried to raise them to make at least Javier pay attention, but words also failed to leave your abused mouth.

“Que buena chica,” Carrillo said from somewhere down below. (What a good girl.)

Your brain didn’t register what he said properly. All you could feel was a fire so intense, so vivid, you nearly saw stars. And something told you that was only the beginning.

And you were proven right.

In the momentary lack of physical touch, you thought about the moment itself, having two of the strongest, most desirable men eager to please you–simultaneously, might you add–and the more you thought about it, the more it threw you off completely. Why? You weren’t really sure. Perhaps it was the idea in the back of your mind that you wouldn’t have thought yourself capable of that. Or them, really. The activity hadn’t been exactly on your to-do list over the past few years and yet now, you couldn’t have thought of a better way to figure out your feelings for them, and to spare time.

The freshly acquired ecstasy was not only enthralling, but efficient as well.

After your second orgasm at Horacio’s ministrations you saw him between your lusted, narrowed eyes, undress completely, Javier was next to you, trailing his fingers up and down your wet torso–wet with wine and his saliva, what a fucking thought– while the both of you saw Carrillo take the remains of his clothes off and took in his lean figure, Javier smirked when he saw him whole and thought to himself the things he would do to the man if he had the time.

Javier wrapped his arms around your waist and helped you roll over to the side to face him, licking his bottom lip in the process and made sure you watched as he did so. He had been eyeing you up and down the entire day, whether clothed or not, and every glance he threw you, ever so dark and desirable, filled with subtext and desire, made you weaker and weaker, just like Carrillo’s touches were.

You reached his face and took his lips in yours, his tongue slid inside your mouth and as he explored the insides and his hand grabbed fistfuls of your ass, you felt the bed shifting behind you, and another hand snaked from behind and found your breast, you were being pressed against and between two bodies and the wam of them was driving you insane, when Carrillo’s fingers played with your nipple you bucked your hips forward and you felt Javier’s erection graze at your lower belly. Javier moved his hand from your ass to your thigh and then he let it slide to your pussy, you bucked your hips backwards and you felt Carrillo’s erection graze at your ass.

“How are you still this wet, bonita?” Javier asked, while his fingers found themselves between your lips.

“Don’t you know the answer by now, Javi?” you muttered, feeling the way Carrillo’s mouth found your shoulders.

You glanced at him and Carrillo the same way Javier looked at you and you understood in an instant why he always preferred to be that way. It was enticing, addicting and sinful, just the way he was.

And by the looks of it, Colonel Horacio Carrillo was no saint either.

“How do you want this to go, chiquita?” Horacio asked behind you as you moved your leg up to allow Javier’s fingers to find a way inside you.

You sighed. Why was he asking you that question when you weren’t even sure something like this would happen? For a brief, brief second you wanted to hide, just grab your clothes and hide. But you found yourself sandwiched between the men that you most desired and you just couldn’t waste this opportunity for the life of you.

So you rummaged around your deepest, filthiest fantasies you’ve had when everything had just been a sinful dream, a product of your lascive thoughts giving into what you catalogued as your darkest secrets and desires and you found one you couldn’t stop think about after it had given you a stars–behind–the–eyes orgasm.

“I want both,” you muttered, feeling the way both men groaned at your sides, “both inside me, please.”

“You sure?” Javier asked, pulling out his fingers from your cunt and looking at the way they glistened, you nodded.

“Words, chiquita,” Horacio said and you turned to see him, he leaned down and stole a short, deep kiss.

“I’m a hundred percent sure,” you murmured against the Colonel’s lips.

“Let’s get you ready, then,” Javier whispered on your neck and you sighed when his fingers slid back into your slit, you closed your eyes when Horacio played your nipples around his fingers and then his hand roamed down your body, finding their way to your pussy.

“Déjame entrar,” Horacio said under his breath, Javier stopped moving his fingers inside you and you squeezed your eyes tighter when Carrillo slid two more fingers inside your cunt.

“Fu–fuck, fuck,” you gasped, Javier let open mouthed kisses around your face and the skin of your neck within reach while your walls tightened around their thick fingers.

“You okay?” Javier asked and you nodded a few times before your body relaxed and got used to the intrusion.

“Mo–move,” you pleaded, feeling Horacio’s mouth nibbling at your shoulder and your neck.

Javier and Horacio moved their fingers at the same time inside you, looking at each other as if marking a dancing pace. You didn’t know what to do with yourself as they moved in and out and curled their fingers in all directions inside you, making you moan and whimper and open up more for them as they somehow found an identical pace to torture you with.

“Eso, eso nena, lo estás haciendo muy bien,” Carrillo praised behind you, feeling the way your walls were giving into the attention and dilating around their fingers (That’s it baby, you’re doing great)

“Más,” you pleaded, rolling your hips against their hands “Más, más,”

They grinned at each other, Javier’s eyes landed on your face and took in the way your features quirked in pure pleasure. Their fingers moving at the same time, pacing in and out faster. Javier’s mouth landed on your shoulder and Carrillo only took in the lewd noise his and Javier’s fingers were making as they pulled in and out at a murdering pace.

“Oh, sh–shit,” you bit your lip and tried to hide your face inside the crook of Javier’s neck but Horacio pulled you away with his other hand.

“We wanna hear you, querida.” he whispered behind your ear, you shivered again at the feeling of his warm breath and then it became too much, their fingers were covered in your arousal as you spread your legs impossibly wider as your throat began growling and your hands landed on both of them, digging your nails on their flesh. Javier hissed against your shoulder and Carrillo bit the skin of your mouth, both of them throwing you together from the cliff and your body spasmed between them.

“Oh my god, oh shit, fuck!” you screamed between their bodies and they slowed their pace to help you ride down your climax “please, please, fuck me, please,” you let out, almost desperately, eager to feel the same with them inside you. They slid their fingers out of you and you shivered again.

Your body was already a mess, after three powerful orgasms you were panting for air, the only thing you wanted was them inside you, you wanted to feel every ridge and every vein of them, you wanted; you needed to cum around them both.

“What is taking you so long?” you opened your eyes, quite frustrated at the lack of attention to your bodies, but the sight that you took in was otherworldly.

Carrillo had his fingers, his covered–in–your–arousal fingers inside Javier’s mouth.

“Fuck,” you let out, dropping your head on the mattress, looking at the way Javier grabbed Horacio’s wrist to keep his hand on his mouth and lick them clean of you while Horacio’s deep gaze took Javier in with a smirk adorning his face.

Horacio pulled his fingers out with a soft pop and they both looked at you, panting and brushing a nipple with your fingers.

“Next time you’ll have to put on a show for me,” you teased.

“You’re ready?” Javier asked, leaning down to kiss your temple, you looked at Carrillo and smiled at him as he licked his fingers.

“Very,” you replied, softly, your voice was already hoarse because of the moaning and screaming they had pulled out of you, they got comfortable on each of your side and you took a deep breath when Horacio lifted your leg and hooked it on his hip.

Javier was the first one to tease your entrance with the dripping head of his cock, when you felt it sliding up and down your slit you gasped and as he pushed himself inside you you grabbed his arm and licked any part of his skin available for you.

“Oh my god,” you cried out softly.

Javier was having a hard time staying still when your walls were warm and wet around him, his hands roamed around your body as Carrillo lined himself with you and him as well and then he pushed.

“Holy fucking shit,” you had close your eyes at the feeling of Horacio making his way inside of you, you breathed and panted and tried so hard to relaxe but they were thicker than their fingers and your pussy was clenching already around them. Javier took your hand and you squeezed his as both of them bottomed up inside you.

Horacio put his hands over the entanglement of yours and Javi’s and the three of you gasped and panted until your body stopped squirming between them and your walls stopped closing themselves at the feeling of two thick cocks making their way inside.

Javier had to close his eyes as well when he felt how your cunt clenched him tight closer to Horacio and he felt himself throb inside you, when he opened his eyes he saw you, open mouthed gasps leaving your body as it got used to being that full, and then his eyes traveled to Horacio, that buried himself in the crook of your neck, he supposed he was feeling the same way as him, trapped in a oh–so–tight hole with him.

“Move, move, move,” you all but begged, the initial sting of being filled like that disappearing and being replaced with the darkest, deepest, hottest desire you had ever felt, “fu–fucking move already!”

Horacio smirked against the skin of your neck at your demand and moved slightly to look at Javier, who nodded once and then, murdering pleasure; Javier pulled out and as he was thrusting slowly back in, Horacio pulled out and moved in as Javier moved out and you gasped and the air in your lungs left you for the time being as your cunt was filled with the two men you wanted the most.

It was pleasure delivered in a delicious swing of two hips rocking back and forth, back and forth, back and forth into you, making you impossibly wetter, incredibly hornier, and way too lost in the haze to even care about anything else.

The way that they were fucking you was shameless, the noises were lewd and your moans invaded the room as soon as they picked up the pace and kept driving into you at the same pace but in different directions.

Four hands caressed your body, two sets of lips nibbled at your skin, two tongues tasted the salty sheet of sweat that had covered your body, two thick cocks used your body at their will, making you want to explode; it was an eager combination of feelings and sensations pulled out of the most sensual, lechery, degenerated dreams you could ever had.

“Harder, please, pleasepleaseplease,” you panted out, gripping any skin and limb your hands could find. Your hips started rolling and rolling and rolling with them as they thrusted and pounded inside you.

“Mierda,” Horacio gasped behind you, biting at your skin, making you whimper.

“You’re so fucking tight, so fu–fucking good, baby,” Javier cried out as your pussy clenched around them and you absentmindedly rolled your hips harder.

It was an entanglement of limbs and wet skin, mouths clashing against skin, hands gripping and grabbing available flesh, a swing of bodies and a symphony of licks, kisses, hums, gasps, pants, begs and praises.

“Shit, sh–shit,” you panted harder and clawed at Javier’s arm when you felt the well-familiar tug on your belly of an incoming orgasm, you hummed and moaned and you felt lips in your ear, licking and nibbling at your earlobe, “I’m so close, más,”

Javier gritted his teeth when you demanded more and angled his hips to pound inside harder, Horacio followed his lead, dropping his hand on Javier’s shoulder for leverage. Carrillo’s touch burned in Javier’s skin and he felt his body stiffen with the feeling of his second release.

“Por dios, querida, me estás matando.” Horacio cried out behind you, feeling as well his body falling from the cliff. (My god, you’re killing me)

Javier’s free hand slid through your wet, glistening skin and his finger circled your clit slowly, you screamed his name, your legs buckled and your entire body squirmed with the sea of sensations your body was feeling and flooding with.

“Cum inside me, please, please,” you panted again, feeling the way your legs started to shake as both of their thrust became erratic and Javier’s finger kept circling around your bundle of nerves you exploded around them, gushing out and soaking them as your orgasm made you scream both their names.

“Mierda, querida, mírate,” Horacio grunted before he gave into the lustfulness of it all and came inside you and around Javier.

Once Javi felt the warmness of Carrillo’s release and the way you soaked both of them and his hand, he locked his hips with yours and spilled himself inside as well, gasping out your name.

“Ohmyfuckinggod,” you let out as a sigh, feeling your legs tremble with the strength of your climax.

The three of you stayed like that, joined, for a while. As your bodies relaxed you finally opened your eyes and saw the way Horacio’s hand was resting on Javier’s shoulder, wrapping you as well between them. Both of them breathing heavily, eyes closed, recovering from whatever the hell you had done was called. You sighed and smiled to yourself. If it weren’t for the four orgasms you had and the way your cunt was throbbing after the abuse and dripping with their seed, you wouldn’t believe it was real at all.

“How was that, cariño?” Javier asked, grazing a hand up and down your arm.

“That was–magnificent,” you gushed, not sure how else to describe that positively euphoric experience, “I think–you two have worn me out.”

Horacio chuckled and moved your head to press a kiss to your forehead, and shifted to allow all three of you to lie somewhat comfortably under the covers. You whined when they pulled out of you, solely because at the loss of them, you felt empty.

“Rest now, querida, we’ll be here in the morning,” he whispered into your hair, and that was all the permission you needed.

“We should–” you brought a hand to your mouth to cover a massive yawn, “–do this again sometime.”

After that, it didn’t take long before you had succumbed to the tempting pull of sleep. Horacio sighed and glanced over your shoulder at Javier, who looked rather worn out himself. Tenderly, Horacio reached over and brushed aside a small strand of hair that had fallen in Javi’s face.

“So, same time next week, then?” Horacio asked, giving Javier a lazy smirk, which was returned in kind.

“Yeah,” Javier mumbled, turning over to drape his arm around your way and bury his face in your neck.

“Absolutely.”

let me know if you wanna be removed :)

pedrito's perma list: @northernpunk​ @pascalesque @sleep-tight1​ @cheekygeek05​ @bii-aan-ckaa​ @letaliabane​ @supernaturalgirl​ @metalarmsandmanbuns​ @asta-lily​ @alliterative-albatross​ @greeneyedblondie44​ @missswriter​ @juletheghoul​ @pedro-pastel​ @agirllovespancakes​ @charlispersonallyhell​ @hopeevenonthisside​ @sherala007​ @magpie-to-the-morning​

dick aneurysm: @starlightmornings​ @mouthymandalorianalso​ @purplepascal042​ @maharani-radha @pascalslittlebrat​ @mothandpidgeon​ @wyn-dixie​ @empress-palpat1ne​ @charnelhouse​

Javi's babies: @pulplorrd​

Priya’s permanent taglist: @captn-andor @cap-n-stuff-main @sarahjkl82-blog @banga-sama​ @revolution-starter​ @phoenixhalliwell​ @velia27 @cynic-spirit​ @leonieb​ @bootyliciousbilbo​ @panagiasikelia​ @mcrmarvelloki​ @stanfordscrush​ @spideysimpossiblegirl​ @salome-c​ @rosiefridayrogersunday​ @princess76179​

Priya’s Javi taglist: @brujademente​ @walt-breslin @rubeskar​

Priya’s Carrillo taglist: @melaniecraig80​ @tropes-and-tales​

#javier peña #javier pena #javier peña fanfiction #javier peña x reader #horacio carrillo #horacio carrillo x reader #Horacio carrillo fanfic #javier peña x reader x horacio carrillo #horacio carrillo x reader x javier peña #narcos #narcos fanfic #narcos netflix #repost #fic repost #maurice compte #maurice compte characters #Pedro Pascal #Jose Pedro Balmaceda Pascal #pedro pascal characters

[kimyoonmiauthor]

Character Agency

Yeah, I had it on my old blog--it’s somewhere in there, but the page keeps reloading preventing me from finding it. And then people stole the list and then claimed they made it up. Per the usual, don’t steal kids, it doesn’t help anyone. (If you didn’t see the reason not to steal--did you read about the real history of the 3 and 5 act models and the gigantic mess of not citing sources which caused a bunch of issues later?)

This time I’m adding caveats to the rules of character agency with some jargon, ‘cause it makes me look cool, like Aelius Donatus using Greek? Nyahh, ‘cause it’s pretty easy to look up.

The Basic rules:

1. The character makes a decision

2. Which affects other characters

3. Such that the events change direction based on those decisions

4. Preferably more than one time.

Originally it took me a long time to think this through and it was spurred by someone asking on Nanowrimo why their character (in a query I was reviewing) didn’t have agency. And also the Bechdel test. Had to be around 2010-ish. I let it brew for a while. I’ve been taught philosophy... so I looked at books, etc.

The Mako Mori test *definitely* wasn’t out yet. (2013) or the Sexy Lamp Test (2013).

Anyway, the argument goes like this:

1. The character makes a decision

If plot is an interaction of setting, character who create events, because it’s not “Character-driven” (Which is why Picard is failing), and it’s not “Event-driven” because events don’t come from nowhere, ideally. Then to get the event chain to advance, characters need to make decisions.

You also get this rule in acting classes within the US. There is a lot of discussion about actors making decisions which change the nature of the script.

OK. That makes sense, right?

2. Which affects other characters.

If the decision has no impact on the characters, then there is no agency in terms of events.

It’s like this, if the character simply agrees with everyone else, they aren’t making an independent decision, are they? They are invisible, because they simply are going along. It’s like the Princess in the tower. She gets rescued by the prince. If she goes along with this narrative, she’s an object in the story.

He goes up, finds the princess, she says nothing, climbs down. She has no say in her rescue. A boring Victorian idea of Medieval romances--believe me the real stuff was far more interesting.

OK, let’s say she makes a decision.

She’s in the tower. She says to the prince she doesn’t want to be rescued. That’s a decision.

Prince ignores her and she decides to go along with it. No agency, no effect, doesn’t phase the prince a bit, though the reader might think that the prince is an a-hole. You get the same outcome. There is no real gain overall.

But say in the third scenario, she screams, slaps him, asks him why he’ trespassing, and the prince is flabbergasted and asks her what she needs?

The plot has potential to change at that point, doesn’t it?

3. Such that the events change direction based on those decisions.

So if she slaps him, tells him what she needs and he goes on to rescue her anyway, against her will (making him a bigger jerk in the reader’s eyes) then there is no gain in the agency of the character. Her decision meant nothing at all. The conclusion/result is the exact same, and then what was the point?

But if she tells him she doesn’t need rescuing and furthermore her parents are going to be back soon, so please come visit in a more civilized manner, and he takes that under advisement and actually does so, then the plot has changed direction, hasn’t it? (Also he’s not a royal asshole).

4. More than one time

‘cause if she only has the ability to make decisions one time in the course of an entire novel that affects the outcome, then there is no sense she can change anything. If her only effective decision was to tell him to come back in a more civilized manner, then what if he comes back and immediately goes on about how he wanted to rescue her and she refused and she said nothing--we’re back to Plot A, which isn’t that dynamic. (Also the prince is back to royal asshole with the gaslighting, but let’s not go there.)

But if she chooses to, in an unprincess manner kick him in the balls, imploring her father to raise his sword to this foreign prince, and put him in jail--didn’t the plot suddenly change and become thicker? If the King actually puts the prince in jail, then the decisions are back to the Prince and what he’d do next. (Which is hopeully not try to be an asshole and gaslight the princess again).

Why would you want character agency to fail?

- You’ve never made a foolish decision, seen the result of the decision fail, and then were relieved at a later date that it failed?

- Nothing is more infuriating than seeing a character make *good* decisions that fail in the face of adversity. That frustration is a rather cheap way to bring the reader to the character’s side.

- The character doesn’t have a real choice. The character might have delayed agency to make big decisions, such as being a minority, slave, or the consequences of their actions could be crushing if they took action. (This is good for teasing out morality)

- They don’t know to think better because they’ve been somewhat brainwashed by expectation.

Sometimes authors need to establish a baseline.

- Time to pause and self-reflect.

Yeah, I know this one is not one that USians and most English speakers like that much, but it’s common in East Asian, South Asian and a bunch more localities’ fiction. The idea is if one makes a decision without consideration and self-examination, it is no action at all, and it becomes inaction. So sometimes making the agency fail, is actually time to succeed. (Fail fast, right?)

Sometimes heightening amount of conflict and faster action isn’t what the characters really need. They need to slow down and figure out and *discover* the problem.

It makes absolutely no sense to have say, a samurai do the same wrong action over and over, getting more people killed without some sort of self-reflection--because self-reflection is baked into Shintoism, Buddhism, etc. It might be funny for something like the Black Knight of Monty Python, but really, some cultures simply call for more than advancing the events as quickly as possible. This may also vary on genre. Self-reflecting every time for suspense might be tedious, but maybe self-reflecting for when someone got into a fight with their ex in a romance might actually be useful.

I’m sure there are other reasons you need it to fail, but I’d ask you to make it at least look thoughtful and purposeful and evoke an emotion in the reader, if not the character. The reader and the character can have different emotional states.

How effective one’s decisions are within a social framework can also tell what rankings they are. If other characters take credit for their ideas, it can also say things about their social standing.

#story theory #writing advice #character agency

[taekooktimeline]

Hello,

In light of some comments I’ve come across today on Facebook (more on the account at the end) I thought I’d reiterate what should be obvious. This timeline, as stated in the pinned post, is THEORY / OPINION. In NO WAY should this blog ever be considered point blank fact. I don’t know how much more obvious I can make it between a pinned post and heavy disclaimers throughout the blog but apparently some people still take issue with my blog and want to criticize. I can’t tell people what to think, so if someone agrees with what I write fine, and if they don’t, that’s fine too. But I can’t be faulted for what someone else says or thinks and I’m astounded I even have to address this. You’ll see in more recent posts I have done my best to be more factual, and let actions speak for themselves. In prior years, Sara and I did theorize. Now that I’ve worked the blog as long as I have, I wish in retrospect I could go back and edit. Unfortunately, tumblr doesn’t allow this without being completely cumbersome, so my hands are tied. I think some theories should stay. I think January 26 is significant. I think Tae reading the CMBYN monologue that he did, during pride month, and then saying “I want to be happy too🥺” on Weverse is pivotal. I am always going to be proud of him for that moment, as it was brave and powerful. I think both “sweet night” and “your eyes tell” are interesting, and should be considered, but I would love to delete all other song speculations and leave this more focused on action. It’s a shame tumblr doesn’t make it easy to modify old posts. I consistently provide links and clips so YOU, the reader, can decide for yourself if you disagree or agree. And if I have to heavily theorize I stated as much. Ultimately, I’m not here to convince anyone. I’ve said that so many times. Whether you believe or not is entirely your prerogative. I will never try to persuade you otherwise.

I appreciate those who stop by to read, and those who support and recommend this blog. If someone doesn’t agree then that’s ok too! I disagree with analysis I come across. We all should be thinking and believing as we want, and what our gut tells us, not based on what someone else says or thinks. I’ve also been consistent in saying this but apparently it needs to be said again.

I’ve been asked before, and thought about it, “is there anything we’ve said I look back and disagree with?” All I can say is yes, if I could go back I would erase some needless theorizing and speculation. It’s fun to speculate things - when they first kissed, first confessed, etc. but I think if I could do things over I’d leave that out. It’s a guess, there’s no way to know. Taekook speak for themselves and that’s the ultimate meaning of the blog for me -letting their actions speak their story (and to archive them). I would also delete song commentary out besides “sweet night” and “your eyes tell”. I didn’t write the analysis of songs, though at the time of publishing I agreed with it all. In retrospect I just don’t think it’s necessary or appropriate honestly. If I could rewrite, I would just provide moments and write the facts as is, which is what I strive to do now to the best of my ability. It is what it is. Tumblr isn’t ideal for things so I have to deal with it. To be clear, I still stand by the blog, I will ALWAYS believe and support Taekook as a romantic couple (though again, if someone doesn’t see that that’s their right and I won’t debate). I would just cut the speculations out, leave it at just facts. I can only hope in newer moments you see I’m doing my best to do that. If I do want to share a fun theory or opinion, I consistently note it. I’m not sure what more I can do to make it clear this blog is theory. At the end of the day, this is a labor of love I do for free, in my free time. It’s supposed to be fun. And I hope it can stay that way. My anxiety messes with me enough. I never expected the blog to get the traction it did. I remain in awe and humbled by it, but hope the love, respect and positivity we strove for at the start can remain. At the end of the day, we’re all here to support. Whether you agree or disagree with my THEORY, we should be united as Taekookers who love and respect Taehyung and Jungkook - as individuals and a couple, as well as ALL the members. We get enough hate. It’s frustrating to see someone arguing about my THEORY when I’ve said enough times it’s that.

In other news, and I may have said this before, but I’m not the best with dates so if I ever get a date wrong, please message me here or on Twitter. If it’s a newer post I can quickly modify (I’m not able if it’s too far in the timeline due to tumblr restrictions). My goal is to be as factual as I can, so I’m happy to edit if I’ve gotten something wrong. Im human!

Please remember it’s just me working this blog now. Sara has stepped down (since approx April 2021) and is running her version on word press. Her current theories and beliefs are not mine, but again, the beauty of existing is we’re all entitled to think and believe as we do.

Real life comes first, and I update this blog with all the love and respect I can when I have time. But it’s not the priority and I hope you understand. I’m going on a very much needed 2-week vacation next week. And I am going to California in December for my first BTS concert (yay!). I did my best to knock out some pending posts before I go. The rest I’ll get to when I can when I’m back (I’m going to be behind on IST episodes 4-5🥲)

I will keep asks closed because I just don’t have time or energy for the type of questions we received. Im sorry.

Finally, Jungkook released a cover of Harry Styles’ “Fallen” today. It’s absolutely beautiful. There’s a reason he’s the golden maknae, the best voice💜if you haven’t heard it please listen and show your support! I am so ready for his mixtape 😭

PS - TK for adults can block me on their Facebook page, delete comments, try to rewrite the story and pretend they weren’t bullying all they want. I was minding my business and came across a very ugly post about my blog and me as a person. I don’t like arguing but I will ALWAYS defend my blog and myself. I will always support Tae and Jungkook. I don’t expect everyone to agree - as this is theory, which I’ve stated multiple times- but there’s NO need to be rude about differences in opinion and write ugly things. At the end of the day we’re supporting Taekook, and BTS. Differences in when they confessed, kissed, etc is irrelevant to the crux of this - that we support. People who come to this space can understand and appreciate my blog is opinion. That’s on them that they can’t do the same💜and I hope going forward to not entertain such trash with my energy! I hate to even make this post but it needed to be addressed. And now I will continue in a positive path. Thank you for reading and supporting 💜💚

#taekook #taekooktimeline #asks #discussions

[demonslayedher]

Buriko-Senpai! This is such a wonderful blog to read, and I love your art so much! It's so nice to see other traditional artists out there! What's your thoughts on the demon slayer marks and their affects after Muzan's defeat? Do you think they're a purely physical effect, or a supernatural curse like Ubuyashiki's? It seems like in the latter case it would be lifted? In Tanjiro's status report, he mentions wanting everyone to be happy "when he's gone", and hints of preparation for the future...

Thank you for the kind words on my art! (≧◡≦) Glad to know people like the style, I like the feel of trad art both for the final product and how the pen feels in my hand, haha~. I love all the additional possibilities in digital art, but will leave that to the people who are good at it. Glad you find my blog a good read too, because we’ve got another lengthy read ahead.

As for the mark and whether it works in a purely physical sense or a curse sense, I'm ok thinking of it in either way, depending on its purposes in post-canon fanwork (but of course, you can do whatever you want in fanwork totally inventing the mark or completely ignoring it too). As Gotouge never states exactly what becomes of Tanjiro, Giyuu, and Sanemi, I don’t feel we can declare it working one way or another. We'll consider it from both angles, but in general, I think canon evidence leans toward an avoidable physical impact. Even that, however, leaves room for interpretation on strict "25" might be or not.

If we approach the curse direction first, the worldbuilding surrounding the Ubuyashiki curse gives a lot of framework for the mark being a curse. The second fanbook even gives us more circumstance and age-related perimeters that seem very arbitrary, like how only one male will survive each generation and how the daughters will also die young by sudden illness or accident if they don’t marry out. As the curse is tied to Muzan’s/demons existence, it is completely lifted once Muzan is eradicated, but Kiriya still anticipates dying in his 20’s and does not feel relieved that it’s gone until he’s in his 30’s. This would put Giyuu and Sanemi in their 50’s if they’re still around, and with their own curses effectively gone, they’d probably have spent the past couple decades insisting to Kiriya that he can relax.

If the rebound of the mark is a supernatural curse, there are a couple other things that make sense about this to me, in the light of cosmic justice at play in this universe. First, it’s a general rule in a lot of philosophies and other works of fiction that to gain something powerful, you must pay the price and sacrifice something. Second, the Ubuyashiki family is cursed to carry the sins of one of its members until they can stop that demon member. While Demon Slayers may not necessarily be carrying the sins of demons, we see demon marks at play in this series first, though its effects are not clear until we see how Nezuko is stronger when her vines appear. A Demon Slayer also gaining extra strength like this is, perhaps, taboo.

As for the mark being a purely physical effect, I think the emphasis on physical effects of the mark (especially how in Chapter 129 Muichiro analyzes its effects on body temperature and the heart), and how throughout the manga it is continually stressed that the Demon Slayers are mere humans even if Breath helps them push the natural limits of human ability, lend to a more physical interpretation that in order to push so far past normal limits, it has to borrow against the natural human lifespan. This is how the characters in-universe also interpret its effects. If we look more into what Muichiro says:

Muichiro: The anger was too strong for me to have any handle on my emotions. I believe that in that moment, my heartrate exceeded 200 beats, and my body felt as hot as though it was burning. My temperature would had measured at least 39 degrees or more. Shinobu: !? Could you move like that? That would be life-threatening. Muichiro: Right. That’s why I think it’s a matter of falling into one category or another. Whether you die or survive that moment is what determines whether a mark will appear or not. Amane: A heartrate of over 200, and why a temperature of 39 degrees? Muichiro: That’s because when I was received treatment at Kocho-san’s place I was running a fever. When my temperature was taken, the thermometer read 39 degrees. At the time I would have been said to have a mark appear, my body was just as feverish.

(For reference, according to searching with the same terms used in the original text, your top heartrate is 220 minus your age, making Muichiro's 206 beats per minute. The average for someone in their 20's is 120~140, somewhat hard exercise would put it at 150, and hard exercise puts it at 170, according to the Borg scale. Normal body temperature in Celsius is 37 degrees; while 39 C = 102.2 F.)

If we look back at when Tanjiro is first facing off against Daki, he considers how he gets more power out of Hinokami Kagura than from Water Breathing because it suits his body better, but he is not yet physically capable of the switch between them. As he psyches himself out in Chapter 77, we see that he has physically been trying to prepare himself for this, and he’s shouting at himself to set his heart ablaze. Clearly, Tanjiro is leaning into that advice from Rengoku-san, and if he’s on his way to getting the mark, he’s been taking that advice somewhat literally.

In Chapter 78, as he purposely raises his own temperature to fight the side effects of switching to Hinokami Kagura, we get a flashback that Kiyo-chan was very worried that Tanjiro was running a temperature of 38 degrees (100.4 F) for three days, but Tanjiro begged her not to tell Shinobu yet because he felt fine in that sustained feverish state, and was able to put more power into Hinokami Kagura that way. (This may also be part of why the mark seems to have a different effect on Sun Breath users, as their body draws from this power in a more sustained way.)

We can probably think of most of the other Breath Users who attained the mark as having gotten it in a similar way to Muichiro. In a fit of high emotion and desperate battle, their body pulled from its natural reserves, and similar to a human and/or demon being exposed to lots of Muzan’s cells all at once and either dying or quickly adapting, they attained a mark and relied on that temporary extra burst of strength. While it either happens or doesn’t happen for the others (Muichiro plainly states he was unaware of a mark’s appearance) based on being the flow of tense battle, Himejima seemed to have gained enough ability that he could choose when he wanted to tap into that power. When we’re first left not knowing what else Amane told the Pillars, Himejima openly wonders what would happen in his case (seeing as he is over the age of 25). In the third light novel, we get a brief scene of Himejima pulling Muichiro aside after that meeting to ask if he’s alright with this, since he’s just found out that he has no chance already of living a long life. Muichiro is fine and wonders about Himejima, who is also fine with this. They both are willing to do whatever it takes to fight Upper Moons and know their survival has never been assured. Himejima goes on to say similar things to Kokushibo in Chapters 169 and 170, when we the readers are finally told about the limited life expectancy. The two of them both sort of expect Himejima to drop dead that night because of his limited stores to draw from. Himejima would had preferred to not raise his temperature so much until facing Muzan (seeing as he knows he’ll be racing against time), but knows he has no choice but to start while facing Kokushibo. Kokushibo is somewhat impressed with his control of getting a mark and his preparation to die, and he finds it a waste of Himejima’s ability and likewise is like, “why not preserve your flesh as a demon” because, as we find out in Kokushibo’s flashbacks in Chapter 178, this was part of what motivated him to accept Muzan’s blood. He couldn’t handle the frustration of his polished techniques being wiped out by a short life span, especially since it would mean he was soon out of time to match or best Yoriichi. If we go back to that conversation between Himejima and Kokushibo, Kokushibo loses his cool (hahaha, that feels like a bit of a pun here) the moment Himejima is like, “there was one exception to the rule though, wasn’t there?” I suspect that Yoriichi was the exception partly due to Sun Breathing being a more perfected, sustained form of pushing the limits of human capability, and Yoriichi being born naturally perfect at it, so his body didn’t need to scramble looking for extras sources of power like hastily (or slowly) borrowing against his lifespan. What’s very interesting about Kokushibo is that he also regularly sustained his mark, so perhaps it’s possible he could had lived past 25? Here's what really key: We also don’t know about these early marked users. Did they regularly sustain their marks, or did they only show up regularly when they battled demons, repeatedly borrowing against their future lifespan? Or was it a one-off thing for each of them, like it was for Giyuu and Sanemi? It’s possible that even if Giyuu and Sanemi are doomed to shorter lives, since they both only had the marks for relatively short periods of time on a single night, they might well exceed 25 years. The fact that Gotouge gave them descendants (as opposed to only implied reincarnations), and because they are both characters generally written as dense in the ways of love and close personal relationships, that sort of implies they needed some time before leaving behind offspring, and I hear a lot of voices in the fandom displeased with the idea of them leaving children behind when they know they won't be around to raise them. Since we don't know any canon details on this, let's cut the boys some slack and say they took a chance on being happy. After all, all their time in the Corp already teaches them tomorrow is never assured.

Side note while we’re on the Sanemi topic, he attains his mark right after Himejima brings his own forth (because Himejima is a badass who can just be like, “ok, now”). While he comments to Himejima what a good idea it was to do Pillar Training so he could attain that powerful state, it’s also possible that being in the presence of someone who already had one was part of what triggered Sanemi’s body to access that state as well. The nature of the mark’s spread from person to person is another tick in the “supernatural curse” box if people like that interpretation more.

Let’s take a look back at Tanjiro, though.

Tanjiro, our special Hinokami Kagura boy, was already a special case for his own knowledge of Sun Breathing (however imperfect), and his own sustained mark (though as Genya notes in Chapter 134, it tends to transform slowly, and as Tanjiro remarks in response to Shinjuro’s comments in Chapter 81, his mark was not something he was born with like the original Sun Breath user was, it was but a childhood injury which took on a different shape when he was injured at the Final Selection). While Amane cites him as the one who started the trickle of marks appearing again, we know in the Pleasure Quarter arc than Tanjiro was been unknowingly training himself to make the mark appear, like the Pillars later tried to do in training.

Tanjiro also, however, has the very unique experience of undergoing repeated cruel and unusual suffering in battle against Muzan, basically dying, turning into a demon with more of Muzan’s cells than any other demon in history, and turning human again with man-made medicine all in the span of about two hours.

We can’t really compare Tanjiro’s case to Giyuu’s and Sanemi’s very easily. Besides the slightly different nature of his mark (which Muzan says will still kill him anyway if he becomes human again, but whether he says that based on a cosmic rule or historical precident, we don't know), we simply don’t know all the details of how Tanjiro's flesh has been affected by everything that happened to him in that two hour period. It seems safe to say that becoming a demon is what saved his life since it rebuilt his flesh and supercharged life back into him, but since he wasn’t a demon long enough to have fully integrated those new cells, the entirely reconstructed parts of him (his left arm and right eye) are essentially lifeless. However, there may still be some amount of reclaiming that his body did during his demon minutes, for the whole right side of his face should be paralyzed (yet he can still use it expressively), and there was probably internal damage throughout his entire body and other various injuries (like stabbing himself) which were repaired enough for him to survive. Had he been a demon longer (long enough that his body with Muzan’s memories likely would had broken down the medicine Kanao gave him), my guess is that he would had fully integrated these body parts, like how Nezuko gets to keep her legs despite all the times they were blown or chopped off.

But we also know that Tanjiro had to take a few months to recover (his visitors looked like they waited the whole three months before getting permission to see him), and that his condition allows him to live and work, but he generally is in a weakened state. Again, rather than only having borrowed (on multiple occasions) against his own lifespan, we don't know the extent of the damage and repair he's undergone.

While he’s got 25 as a historical benchmark to anticipate, and as you mention, he does seem to fully anticipate that early demise, his case is so unique that it could go in any direction. Tanjiro might live longer than 25, as this would give him time to pass on Hinokami Kagura to at least his eldest son, but like Tanjuro, he’d probably have a pretty weak constitution for the rest of his dwindling life. But also worth noting, the phrase is that they die by at least age 25. That means some of the Warring States era swordsmen probably died before that age. (｡•́︿•̀｡) I don't feel this is likely for Tanjiro, Giyuu, and Sanemi, but it is worth noting as a possibility.

#kny fandom theories and meta #kamado tanjirou #kamado tanjiro #tomioka giyuu #tomioka giyu #shinazugawa sanemi #himejima gyomei #himejima gyoumei #tokitou muichirou #tokito muichiro #tsugikuni yoriichi #kokushibo #kokushibou #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer

[thewritingginger]

Obey Me! Brothers React: Baby?!?

This is a VERY old request that I actually found I had when scrolling through my blog lol

I liked it so much so I did the thing. It also gives some fluff between all the sin I have in my WIPs 

Enjoy~

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lucifer:

Probably the calmest out of the bunch

“Are you okay?” “I’m prepared to take responsibility and make sure you’re happy.”

Makes sure you have your doctor appointments and goes with you

Very attentive to your needs

Over all he is pretty organized and prepared . . . on the outside

On the inside he’s a bit of a hoverer, but never too obvious. Just kinda stands to the side and observes,”just in case” you are carrying precious cargo afterall

Also he won't say it outloud but seeing your growing belly makes his pride shine the most and very territorial of you more than usual You are his and everyone will know

Kinda low-key didn’t not-not try to impregnate you but you didn’t hear that from me…

You and lucifer ended up having a Baby Boy Great another boy in the house

“Am I just destined to be surrounded by boys my whole life?” “I can always try to give you a girl. Just tell me when.” 😉

Yeah you’ll probably wait a year or two to actually plain for another baby, that is if Lucifer doesn’t “if it happens it happens”you again and BOOM baby #2 smh

Not as strict as one may think when thinking of Lucifer’s parenting style

Mammon definitely has something to say about that 

Does like to try and keep to a daily schedule of when they not just eat and sleep but also scheduled play and study time when they get to that age

Mammon:

He may need an ambulance

JK but he is a bit of a nervous wreck

Wait till he finds how birth works

But after the initial shock he is still worried about you

Maybe a bit overbearing

“Mammon, I can walk! I’m pregnant, not crippled.” “What? I can’t carry you around for no reason now?”

You end up having a Baby Girl

Cue panic mode!

Must protect baby girl at all costs Daddy mode engaged!

“My Love, you don’t have to watch her all night. She’ll be fine.” “I don’t know that!”

That dad that gets upsetty spaghetti if a “snot-nosed brat” messes with his perfect daughter on the playground

Leviathan:

Levi.exe has stopped working

Try turning off and turning on and try again later

Wasn’t ready for you to say it

I mean sure you guys do do the do, bUt hOw?!?!?

“Can we go back?” “Levi this isn’t a video game level.”

Don’t get him wrong he’s not mad just scared!

He’ll get into it after he has time to process it 

“I guess it would be nice to have another player when your busy.”

Started “practicing” with a life simulator game

You and Levi had a baby boy!

Games galore! 

When your little boy is still a baby obviously he can’t play video games with Levi but Levi has surprisingly really liked playing peek-a-boo

You do find Levi with your son on his chest as he plays video games most of the time when he’s watching him 

Satan:

Is about tied with Lucifer on the calm factor

Actually knew before you told him

“How the heck did you know, I just told you.” “Your period was late.”

Read all the books he can find on parenting and newborns in both humans and demons

You kinda wished he didn’t read so much because it went from ‘just wanting to cover all bases’ to being a bit of a worry wart and always “helping” you and “informing” you

Can you say Papa Bear!!! VERY protective!!!

Will damn near bite someone's head off if they bump into you especially w/o apologizing

Reads and/or plays music for the baby every night

“They say they can start to hear and recognize things in the womb at about 18-24 weeks. I have so many books I’d want to show them so might as well start early.”

Finds himself talking to and kississing your belly when your asleep late at night

“I promise I’m gonna make sure I’m the best Dad for you!”

Does touch your belly though everytime he kisses you

You and Satan had a Baby Girl

Truely a Daddy’s girl! She definitely has him wrapped around her little finger

He denies it but it’s true lol

Checks under the bed for “the scaries” every time she asks 

“You know Daddy will always protect you!”

Obviously the one to teach her to read and write. Making sure they get at least 30 mins of reading time together where they take turns

You’ve walking into the library many times to see Satan laying on the couch with your daughter on his chest, both asleep

At some point he finally admitted to you that he’s scared to “let her go”

He wants his baby girl to be his baby forever but he knows sadly she has to grow up but he hopes that when that happens they still have their book discussions and reading time together

It’s how he bonds with her the most.

Okay. Okay. I’ll stop cuz we should know I love Daddy Satan so I’ll stop before i get out of hand lol

Asmodeus:

OMG A NEW DOLL TO DRESS UP!!!

Ok but really he is excited

“With my charm and your cuteness, this child is gonna be the most sought after person in devildom.”

The day you told him he started preparing their room. Filling the room with bins of stuffed animals and toys

And clothes. Lots and lots of clothes.

“Asmo we don’t even know the gender yet.” “That’s ok! What ever we don’t use I guess we’ll just have to make another for those.”

He is gonna be in for a rude awakening literally when the baby comes

Say goodbye to your beauty sleep Asmo 

You and Asmo had a Baby Girl

When he found out you were having a girl, demon lord help this new doll baby

Dress up everyday 

Loves parading her around in his arms or the stroller

“Excuse me, Princess coming through!” 

Beelzebub:

Telling him you were pregnant made him really happy!!!

“I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else.” “You’ll be the best mother.”

Of course he was nervous but he had you and you always knew how to make him feel better

And when the stress of the actual baby came up he just focused on what he did know

Snacks. Snacks. & more Snacks!!!

Your pregnancy cravings were arguably the easiest part of your pregnancy for him because he was always down to go get them for you it also gave him an excuse to get more snacks for himself too and he got to try all your favorite snacks and weird concoctions you’d want.

You and Beel had surprise, surprise. Twins!!!! Fraternal Twins to be exact, a boy and a girl

One baby was scary enough but, multiply it by two!?!? Oh nelly.

But Beel really has a way to calm you.

Divide and conquer is your modo

He’ll bathe and clothe them and you feed them Beel has helped with the feeding but somehow the food seems to disappear rather fast and the rest you share and tag in and out of

Belphegor:

Baby?!?!?

I’m sorry. He must have heard you wrong.

Maybe he is still asleep and this is a dream

But nope. It’s not! You are tellin his face that he had accidentally put a … baby… inside you…

“Are you really pregnant?” “Yup” “I’m telling you right now I’m getting rid of it if it interferes with my sleep.”

Yeah… that didn’t happen :)

He lost sleep, yes. But although annoyed he was even shocked with how attached?!? He was to the child

Oh you had a boy!

You thanked the heavens for not “gifting” you with twins

A plus is your little boy takes after his father when it comes to sleep

Altho he’s still a baby so restless nights are still very much in your future 

Belphie gifted him his very own special pillow :3 He was sick of his kid stealing/hogging his

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

I kinda went into them as parents bit oops  I got too excited lol

Maybe I can do more Daddy AUs in the future if that’d interest anyone.

I hope you enjoyed reading this, I really liked writing it.  I can’t be the only one obviously that really likes Daddy AUs :3

I love the fluff and I hope you do too :D

~ Undateables Reactions ~

💛 ~

#OBEY ME #obey me game #shall we date #shall we date obey me #obey me x reader #obey me lucifer #lucifer #obey me mammon #mammon #obey me leviathan #leviathan #obey me satan #satan #obey me asmodeus #asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #beelzebub #obey me belphegor #belphegor #daddy au #pregnant mc #reaction headcanon #headcanon #request #so freakin old #oops

[nightswithkookmin]

chile i'm so glad i came across your blog, the amount of "i'm not going to assume they're dating" or "we can only draw certain conclusions but i can't say for sure" "we don't know their sexuality, BUT" type blogs i follow is getting kinda wack lmao. while i appreciate their perspective and nuanced takes i need to strike a balance. like let's get a lil delulu every once in a while. 💀

lol the im-not-a-shipper-but-call-jikook-boyfriends-every-other-post blogs are the funniest to me. the shipping hierarchy, so to speak is so weird. maybe just because im not a "shipping real people is bad" person i don't see the big deal. gonna get called delulu anyway, might as well go full out. they is gay/queer and they're fucking. i'm so sorry.

*also can we touch on the fact that shipping in this type of fandom (kpop) is kind of inevitable and unavoidable??! these boys are the other people we see them with day in and day out, interacting with each other and no one else. i feel like it's natural to ship when there's no other people around to break up everything, idk maybe someone can articulate this better than me. and people who are made to feel stupid for thinking that 2 members could actually be dating is so dumb. like is it really out of the realm of possibility that two people (jikook, cause all them other ships are....😬) who spent almost every waking minute together for like 8 years could fall in love. really?

/rant

It's the delulu hat for me

Lmho.

I guess for me being queer, I feel it's gaslighting for these people to be saying things like that. As silly as it is, it inadvertently deny and invalidate the existence and queerness of gay individuals and so I struggle with it.

This is the consequences of straight people in gay people business. They like defining gay parameters for us and it's like who asked you?? I feel people who say things like that are just plain ignorant or tone deaf or willfully homophobic.

I don't think everyone in BTS is gay but it makes me feel safe to see half the community assume them to be and celebrate them in that way. They are not cussing at them and threatening to leave the fandom or cancel them for this assumption and that is huge inspiration to me.

Those parts of the fandom are a safe space to be in as a queer army.

When people assume a person's queer sexuality they are simply admitting to themselves at the very least that LGBTQ EXISTS. This is important to me because I grew up in a community where LGBTQ didn't even exist in the collective consciousness of the people and EVERYONE IS AUTOMATICALLY ASSUMED TO BE STRAIGHT AND EXPECTED TO BE.

People read people's sexuality all the time and have done so since time immemorial and a lot of the time when they have had a sexuality read it's in the lines of straight, cis, rich, poor, superior or inferior. And that is a problem for some of us too because that discrepancy in the assumptions is as a result of homophobia and heteronormativity.

That whole don't assume a person's queer sexuality debacle sounds to me like a boujee way of denormalizing and preventing the normalization of queerness disguised under care, disguised under intelligence and disguised under wokeness. Especially when straightness is the default setting in this giant blue bulb.

We need to radicalize that. We need to change the cis straight default setting and if you are perpetuating this narrative you really aren't helping the situation. SIT DOWN.

I'm rarely assumed to be queer in certain circles and while that makes me feel comfortable within those circles it often times make it hard for me to admit my queerness openly in those circles too because I fear I will lose that comfort and respect and love and privileges that comes with being percieved straight in those spaces.

When I started my blog, I noticed some people assumed I was white and would use certain black descriptors as slurs when describing other people to me. I quickly had to switch the formal way in which I wrote to a much casual tone so my blackness would show through. Don't get it twisted. She black. She blackidy black black.

Then on the other hand, I was hesitant to let my queerness be known too because being black, I was marginalized as it is- you is black, or sound black💀 you know how it is- it's that intersectionality of oppression at play. Double double homicide.

When certain people realized I was black POC minority, their attitude towards me changed. I had those who didn't so much understand what black language is or perhaps wasn't used to being in black spaces and were uncomfortable with my blackness- these would take offense at me saying certain things in certain ways. Like chilee relax Karen, all I said was these motherfukkers gay as shit and they gay. Why you acting like I called them twinks or sommin. Right there, I'm cancelled for calling Jikook motherfuckers. They get sirens and everything😭😭😭😭😭😭

Same vein, I struggle destraightening myself or correcting people who assume I'm straight because I fear they will treat me differently if they knew I wasn't.

Straight privilege exists in the same way as white or even pretty privilege may exist and because these exist there's that automatic conception of queer, poc, ugly, fat disemfranschismet to run along side it.

People treat you differently based on how they perceive you. That's a fact. And for queer people, perceiving us as straight is the only way we get to be treated as human by the masses. And a lot of us embrace that- straight until proven gay am I right 🤣🤣🤣🤣

It's the duper's delight for me. Untill you catch me with a 5'8 melanin skinned silk pressed auntie on my left nipple good luck proving I'm gay.

It can be fun, I akekeke when some people around me are totally oblivious to the fact and even sometimes defend my straightness with their dying breath when nasty friends throw them shades or try to out me unprovoked.

A lot of us don't want to admit we are gay because we don't want to be disenfranchised.

I speak for myself when I say this.

But 'Don't assume someone's sexuality' is a double edged censorship used for and against queer people. It seemly offers protection on the surface of it for queer people but underneath it promotes heteronormativity and standardizes straightness and it is also used to promote closet culture, under the disguise of care and concern for the autonomy of queer people but that is a fallacy because our autonomy has never mattered to anyone since the dawn of homophobia.

And I don't know where this interpretation comes from. Why do people not want to assume queer people's sexuality but it's ok to assume straight people's???

It feels like a hijacked movement to me.

THIS IS THE ACCURATE MOVEMENT AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED.

Don't assume all people are straight. It's ok to assume some people are queer because queer people exists too.

It is wrong however to assume queerness based on how a person talks, walks, dresses or even on their body type. That is stereotyping. And stereotyping is wrong.

When it comes to Jikook, Jimin is often stereotyped as gay more so than Jungkook because they have different body structures. Jungkook is stereotyped too solely because of the way his wrists hang, or based on moments he's femininity shines through.

But I don't think shippers stereotype Jikook in that way at all. I dont think shippers believe Jikook are dating eachother simply because Jungkook applied setting powder to his face that one time. They assume they are gay only because they believe those two to be dating eachother. That is not stereotyping. If those two were heterosexuals I don't think people will accuse their shippers of stereotyping.

It's one thing to assume Kai is gay because he looks skinny and dances well. It's another to assume he is gay because in a relationship with Gdragon. And if people can't tell the difference between the two, they should get some education and stop talking about things they know nothing about or only know because they stumbled across user69 on Twitter. They are not helping.

Untill people get offended when people assume others are straight, that rhetoric doesn't matter in its inequality. If you ask me, everyone is gay until proven straight.

Yet how many people will take offense at that?

Assuming people can be gay is not delulu.

It's ok to assume people can be gay. It's wrong to stereotype them as gay. If you can't assume they are gay, don't assume they are straight and don't assume at all. Run with this sis.

Wait, they don't ship Jikook but they call Jikook boyfriends???????👀👀👀👀👀

The fake woke syndrome will kill people in this fandom with these mentally confused thought crisis bunch💀💀💀💀

Jikook themselves are shippers💀

Smh

GOLDY

[dragonfire2lm]

What I Learned as a Demisexual/Demoramtic

Now, I’ve started to frequent the r/demisexuality subreddit, and one of the most common posts are people asking for advice or information because they’re questioning.

Perfectly understandable. I help where I can on posts I feel like I can actually offer help on and I’m going to share that same advice on here with you all on the off chance it’ll help someone. Granted, this will mostly be me parroting information others have told me or information from the articles and videos I’ve watched, but this isn’t something that is widely known and I want to try and educate as well as help.

While I will remain as clinical and respectful as possible, I will be bringing up the topic of sex.

What is Demisexuality?

Demisexuality is part of the asexuality spectrum, and is the complete absence of sexual attraction until a bond is formed. Let me stress that it isn’t “being picky”, or “normal”, demisexuals do not feel any sexual attraction at all until the prerequisite of a strong emotional bond is established. Demisexuals do not see people on the street, actors, or celebrities “hot”.

There is no desire, no reaction, no drive to have intimate relations with someone if they don’t know them.

This means that demisexuals are functionally asexual until they care about someone enough to develop sexual attraction. Personally, it’s less to do with looks, and more to do with who the person is. For example I find my boyfriend attractive because of the amount of love, respect and, trust we have for each other. It’s who he is that matters, not what he looks like.

Can I be Straight/Bi/Gay/Pan and still be Demi?

Yes. The Asexual and Aromantic Spectrums is often used as an additional label to the more “well known” sexualities. I myself am a Straight Cis female that is Demisexual and Demiromantic.

You can be demisexual/asexual/gray asexual and still be romantically attracted to a specific gender, as the Asexual spectrum only concerns sexual attraction and nothing else.

With that said...

Sexual Attraction and Romantic Attraction are Two Different Things!

Despite what society and modern media would have you believe, sexual attraction (the desire to be sexually intimate with someone) and romantic attraction (the desire to date someone/ fall in love) are two different things.

Just because a demisexual does not feel sexual attraction until after getting to know someone, that doesn’t mean they can’t fall in love. In fact the “emotional bond” I keep bringing up can be platonic or romantic.

I’m going to be using myself as an example, I knew my boyfriend for a few years before I realized that I liked him as more than a friend, that I liked him romantically, but I wasn’t yet comfortable with the idea of doing anything intimate with him when we first got together two years ago. It was around nine months (roughly) into the relationship, after talking things out, discussing what we wanted out of the relationship, what I was comfortable with, and trusting him enough to be ok with even talking about sex.

I loved him first, and found him attractive as time went on.

So, for those demis with significant others, for those of you who are dating a demi, and especially for people questioning if they are demi, please heed this next bit of advice.

Communication Is Key!

I cannot stress this enough, you need to be okay with having actual conversations, you need to aware of both your own boundaries and those of your partner. And for you singles out there, you need to be able to clearly explain this to any potential partners you may have, it will save you a ton of pain and heartbreak in the future.

It’s heartbreaking to see people on the Demisexuality subreddit deal with some horrible situations because they’re pressured into doing something, or assumptions are made based on how dating and hook-up culture work...

Sexual Attraction is Different from Sex Drive or Arousal

This is a point that a lot of people get confused with, thinking that getting turned on, viewing erotic material, and their own libido means they aren’t demi.

Sexual attraction is seeing someone and having the desire to have sex with them.

Sex drive is the desire to have sex in general, it is a biological process and is perfectly normal to have. An undirected thing that just happens. Demisexuals can have high or low sex drives, Asexuals can have high or low sex drives. Anyone can have high or low sex drives. What matters is the lack of or limited attraction to others that defines people on the asexual spectrum.

And yes, you can watch porn, read explicit fanfiction, whatever suits your taste. Arousal is nothing more that reaction to erotic stimuli and is a normal thing.

It’s even okay if you want nothing to do with sex. There are people who enjoy, others don’t and that’s okay.

Demisexuality VS Demiromanticism

I mentioned the Aromantic Spectrum earlier and have already stressed the fact that wanting to bang someone and falling in the love with them are two separate things. For those of you curious, Demiromanticism is similar to Demisexuality in that both of these orientations require a strong emotional connection to a person as a prerequisite, the difference being what the prerequisite relationship is for.

Demisexuals require an emotional connection before they are sexually attracted to someone.

Demiroamtics require an emotional connection before they are romantically attracted to someone.

There is no “Lust at first sight” with a Demisexual and no “Love at first sight” with a Demiromantic.

And you can be Demiromantic, Demisexual or both.

I am both, it took quite a while to figure that out, let me tell you. I had a genuine moment of “Wait, people actually fall in love at first sight irl? That’s a thing?” as well as a moment of “People want to F***, just because?”

As a demiromantic and demisexual, I was very confused for a while there.

Things Demisexuality Is Not!

It is not “a choice”. It is a fundamental part of how a person thinks, how they function. I can no more stop being demi than my boyfriend can stop liking boobs.

It is not “a kink”. I’ve had this one said to me personally and for the love of god, ew no. It is not a kink. It is something firmly rooted in how I am as a person you uneducated, narrow-minded Ding-Dong. Kinks are fine, perfectly fine so long as it's safe and everyone involved consents. What I'm not okay with is people blatantly ignoring information about a sexuality to label it as a kink.

“Isn’t everyone like that?” No, Let me put it this way, if the entire world was Demisexual, sex appeal wouldn’t exist in media because it wouldn’t work.

Bonus Round: Being Demi and Having Fictional Crushes

This is something I posted about on reddit, that got a lot of positive attention as most demis that replied didn’t really know about this, but could relate to once I put it into words.

I’d often get attached to fictional characters to the point of being hyper fixated on a select few and develop crushes on them. Some characters I’d even seek out explicit fanfiction of.

This is because I am essentially developing a one-way bond with that character. It’s not with every character mind you, there are some characters I have crushes that don’t involve NSFW content, and there are plenty of characters I like platonically.

But the fact that my hyper fixations and fictional crushes made so much sense after I figured I was demi was a relief and a fun little thing to figure out.

“Oh I’m demi... That explains so much...”

If You Have Anymore Questions, Feel Free to Ask Me!

I do have the ask box open on this blog, or you can head to r/demisexuality and hopefully someone with more experience than me can help.

I hope this was educational and helpful to a degree.

#demisexuality #informative #demiromantic

[wangxianficrecs]

Follower Recs

Stories I haven’t read yet, but clearly need to put on my ever-expanding List.

~*~

Welcome back queen [Thank you, it’s so lovely to be back!] if ur still doing follower recs I gotta recommend I would wait for a thousand years by bleuett it’s soooooooo good

[This one was actually recced to me by two different people, the other of whom said, “ Maybe I'm crying a little so I feel like a should recommend ‘I would wait for a thousand years’ by bleuett on ao3.”]... it’s def. on my List!

I would wait for a thousand years

by bleuett (T, 10k, wangxian)

Summary:  During the worst of winter, a traveler comes to stay at Lan Wangji's inn. He wears a red ribbon in his hair.

“Do you see the rabbit?” Wei Ying asks and points at the moon. “That’s the moon rabbit, he helps make Chang’e more immortality elixir. He keeps Chang’e company.”

“I do not wish the rabbit for company,” Lan Wangji says tightly. “You are the one I want by my side.”

“And I’m here, Lan Zhan. If you go to the moon, I’ll follow you, I’ll always be here now.”

~*~

I just read a great fic by aisthuu "every love story is a ghost story", didn't see it in your recs so wanted to recommend it! LWJ is a guqin composer and teacher, buys a cheap guqin off eBay which ends up being attached to WWX's spirit from canon era. It's bittersweet, LWJ deals with Lan's homophobia (implicit in a Lan way) and his feelings towards the ghost. This is author's only ao3 fic and honestly I don't remember how I stumbled upon it, but I'm happy I did and hope you will enjoy it too!  [I’ve recently read this one, and loved it!]

every love story is a ghost story

by aisthuu (M, 59k, wangxian, my bookmark)

Summary:  The man is in Lan Zhan’s bed. Did they—he begins to wonder, eyes trailing to where the man’s body lies under the blanket. Had Lan Zhan—?

Then the sleep-fog clears and Lan Zhan realizes that the young man isn’t quite opaque around the edges.

“You’re a spirit.”

The spirit narrows its eyes. “I’m so much more than that.”

(Lan Zhan buys a guqin off eBay for a suspiciously low price, only to find that it’s haunted. And now there’s a ghost in his bed.)

~*~

Ok so I absolutely have to rec "see you yesterday" by glyphic. It's a wip, but it's currently at 101k so there's a whole lot there, and it's terrible and wonderful and beautiful all at once. The way the backstory of canon events is adapted to the modern-with-cultivation setting is brilliant, and then there's the amnesia, and then there's the time loop. This fic lives permanently rent-free in my brain.

see you yesterday

by glyphic (M, 101k, wangxian, WIP)

Summary:  

Wei Ying 21:09 hey lan zhan what’s the weirdest way youve died

Lan Zhan 21:11 Falling encyclopedias.

Wei Ying 21:12 omg no way that’s so rude turning books against you???

Lan Zhan 21:13 A betrayal I will never forget.

On Halloween night, an exiled demonic cultivator and a Lan disciple get stuck in a time-loop, find each other, and try to figure it all out.

~*~

If you are looking for recs for yourself I absolutely love (the complete!) story Just as the Snow Melts by draechali on AO3. It's a canon divergence where everyone lives, even WWX! ~ @airmidcelt

Just as the Snow Melts

by draechaeli (T, 67k, wangxian)

Summary:  Like a snowy mountain top in spring the residents of the Burial Mounds trickled down the mountain and joined the flow of society.

“I went to the Burial Mounds,” Lan WangJi said.

“Ah, yeah… I’m sorry Lan Zhan,” replied Wei WuXian, “I hadn’t thought anyone would come to visit. I am still not sure how it happened; I brought A-Yuan to Yiling to play by the river and then ended up somehow teaching a bunch of children swimming and writing along with him.”

~*~

Hello! It's come to my attention that you have not as yet read Grandmaster of Meme-onic Cultivation! Please do! It's the only thing that gave me joy during 2020 😆 like proper belly laughs and disney villain style cackling. It is a wip, and it is long but so so worth it!! The author has reworked the entire canon through these message crystals and still conveys complex characters despite the tricky format. It's just so good!! Highly highly recommend it! ❤ ~ @theladypeartree  [Oh!  I’ve been subscribed to this one, and know that @swaglexander-the-great is a reliable provider of Hilarity, so I’m excited for it to be finished!]

Grandmaster of Meme-onic Cultivation 

by Hades_the_Blingking (T, 49k, wangxian, WIP)

Summary:  The Untamed universe is exactly the same, except everybody has magical crystals that have a suspiciously familiar messaging system. The story is pretty much the same as the show, except everyone lives!! (so minor changes).

or in which Wei WuXian tries his darndest to date Lan Zhan, Jiang Cheng possibly has a aneurysm, Jin ZiXuan is still the most awkward human alive, and Xue Yang makes me write some VERY cursed things. Written in chatfic format! :3

~*~

Chomrafy on AO3 deserves love and encouragement; she’s written a body of compact, poetic, and eloquent shortfics each of which can stand alone, but that comprise an intricately cross-referential and mostly internally-consistent universe. They’re grouped as chapters in works according to theme; for example, “in cupped hands” focuses upon Jin Ling and his second-generation baggage; “Departure in Autumn” portrays the last years of WWX’s first life. Follow the tag “Chomrafy’s MDZS shortfics.” [I don’t see this tag?]

in cupped hands

by chomrafy (G, 2k, wangxian)

Summary:  Of secrets, of futures, of love. A Jin Ling-centric collection of 200-word fics.

Ch.1: Jin Ling repays a debt (JL, JC, & WWX). Ch.2: Jin Ling and a ghost in the mirror. (JL & JYL) Ch.3: A matter of friends (JL & the other kids) Ch.4: In this house we don't keep dogs (JC & WWX) Ch.5: In the end, he remains silent (JL & uncles) Ch.6: A first night hunt, of sorts (JL & the other kids) Ch.7: Jin Ling, forgiving, forgetting (JL & LXC & JGY) Ch.8: Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling argue (JL, JC, & WWX) Ch.9: Jin Ling and his father (JL & JC) Ch.10: Jin Ling speaks up (JL, JC, & WWX) Ch.11: Jin Ling and a piece of home (JL, JC, & WWX)

Departure in Autumn

by chomrafy (not rated, 6k)

Summary:  Four perspectives. A steady march to the end.

Ch.1: Because if anything happens to them, Wen Qing would never be able to heal with these hands again. Ch.2: As long as this is still home, Jiang Yanli will wait as long as she needs to. Ch.3: Five times Jiang Cheng reaches for Wei Wuxian, one time he turns away. Ch.4: Whether the road is broad or narrow, bright or dark, they would have to keep walking. Wei Wuxian digs Wen Qing's grave.

~*~

Hello, hope all is going well. I don't have an ask, by I do have a recommendation. I read this fic a while ago and found it again. I just wanted to recommend this for everyone. Let me know what you think please. Thank you. [Oh!  This one’s in my To Read list, but  I’d forgotten about it.  Mmmm, fox!wwx and dragon!lwj.]

Ten miles of Lotus Flowers

by Yukirin_Snow

M, 274k, wangxian

Summary:  He was a mischievous fox spirit, wreaking havoc where he went, about to depart on a journey that would span centuries.

He was a heavenly prince, a proud dragon destined to ascend the throne to become emperor.

Neither expected their paths to collide over the span of three lives.

~*~

I forgot if it was your blog 😥 that recommended “Bestseller” (when Wei Wuxian writes the Xianxia cut-sleeve equivalent of Fifty Shades of Grey, based entirely on his experiences with Lan Wangji, he doesn’t expect it to become the next big hit) (https://archiveofourown.org/works/21528316/chapters/51318766)

But OMG IT WAS HILARIOUS!!! I LOVED IT!! And if it wasn’t your blog, I’m so sorry for how weird this sounds 😭😭😭😭 I just loved this fic so much that I have to tell it to someone 😢 [It’s on my List, but I haven’t read it yet!]

Bestseller

by pupeez4eva

M, 8k, wangxian

Summary:  He had written the book to prove a point. It was never supposed to be a big thing, and he certainly never intended for everyone — Jiang Cheng, Zewu-Jun, the Juniors, literally everyone— to be reading about his sex life.

Oh God, he definitely needed to make sure Lan Zhan didn’t find out about this.

(Or, when Wei Wuxian writes the Xianxia cut-sleeve equivalent of Fifty Shades of Grey, based entirely on his experiences with Lan Wangji, he doesn’t expect it to become the next big hit).

~*~

I’d like to rec On Your Marks, Get Set, Bake! by @blackwiresgrowonherhead

It’s one of my absolute favorites and I laughed out loud so many times when reading it

on your marks, get set, bake!

by BlackWiresOnHerHead

G, 41k, wei wuxian & juniors

Summary:  Jin Ling resumes thumping on the door to room 721, and the small collection of freshmen starts chanting “Senior Wei! Senior Wei! Senior Wei!” with increasing volume until finally Wei Wuxian opens the door.

“Yes?” he says with his widest, most innocent eyes.

“Senior Wei!” demands Lan Jingyi, shoving himself to the front of the group. “Why didn’t you tell us you’re a contestant on this year’s season of The Great Gusu Bake Off?!?”

--

Several months ago, college student Wei Wuxian secretly competed in the most popular reality show in the country. The show starts airing in the fall. The freshmen in his dorm collectively lose their minds.

~*~

If you're in the mood for v. short ridiculous fun fic, may I suggest My chain hits my chest/When I'm bangin' on the radio by x_los It's 2k modern cultivators AU, featuring WWX calling LWJ's sword Bitchin' [omg I’m laughing so hard] and I think it's more fun going in blind?

My chain hits my chest/When I'm bangin' on the radio

by x_los

T, 2k, wangxian

Summary:  Lan Wangji finds he doesn't even need to call for help for Wei Wuxian to come running.

#follower rec #wangxian fic rec #I HAVEN'T READ THESE YET #wangxian #mdzs