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dkniade · 1 year

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Mondstadt Songwriter AU stuff

Inspired by @koriyue’s website mock-up of the boy-band 5wirl’s first album “With The Wind” here

some interactions and concepts I’ve had a while back

Diluc, Venti (ft. Jean), Kaeya (ft. Rosaria), Albedo

(Basic profiles + albums track names at the end. See if you can spot the symbolisms and parallels in the albums…?👀)

Metal musician “Noctua” Diluc trying to find a sound engineer

Noctua: Are the recordings alright?

Jean: Mr. Diluc, with all due respect, I don’t think I can handle even ten seconds of the first track. The genre is… rather intense for me.

Noctua: I see… Thank you for telling me. I apologize for not knowing before.

Jean: Please don’t worry about it. You and I have different styles, after all. Oh, but if you’re looking for sound engineers that work with diverse genres, I’d recommend Bar— Er, Venti.

[later]

Venti: So, you’re the metalhead Noctua that Jean told me about, huh~? I’ll be honest. I couldn’t tell at first. You need a sound engineer?

Noctua: …And you look like you’ve only mixed pop tracks.

Venti: Hehe, you don’t know who I am, do you? I know every song from the past and present, and the ones that have yet to be released!

Noctua: How—

Venti: You could say I’m the god of songs, ehe! Trust me, Noctua. Your tracks will be in good hands with me. Or if you don’t believe me, you can take a listen to DarkRose’s metal album that I’ve worked on?

Noctua: “DarkRose”?

Venti: Doesn’t ring a bell? Maybe the name “Rosaria” would sound more familiar? She doesn’t think I should call myself the “god of songs” but even she came to me for her album.

Noctua: So the musician that Oculus has made friends with is Rosaria…

Venti: Oho? You know Oculus?

Noctua: Nevermind about that. It’s in the past now. So are you available to mix my album?

Venti: I’ll make your vision a reality! Now, tell me more about this album of yours…

Feb 17, 2023.

“Oculus” Kaeya Hides His Album from Venti and Works with Albedo

Venti: A certain Noctua has asked me to master his new album… But I’m a little tight on Mora lately. Say, aren’t you also touching up yours, Mr. Alberich? I can do yours afterwards~

Kaeya: Haha, I appreciate your offer. You’re certainly a talented engineer, but I’m afraid I’ll have to decline.

Venti: Oho? It’s not like you to be so formal. And around your drinking buddy? What’s your album called?

Kaeya: Death After Noon, simply for the taste of it. Anyway, I’ve got some guesses of what Diluc’s album might be about. You must have your hands full with a… fiery style like his, no?

Venti: I’m flexible with genre.

Kaeya: Genre isn’t the problem here.

[beat]

Venti: Is there something in the lyrics you don’t want me to know?

[Kaeya recalls how he has cried on vocal takes because the lyrics are too personal and it’s his first time putting these emotions into a song.]

Kaeya: Me? Secretive lyrics? Come now, I haven’t gone through that much.

Venti: You’ve got good taste, naming it after such a delicious alcohol.

Kaeya: Why thank you~

[later that day]

Kaeya: Kreideprinz—

Albedo: Simply Albedo is fine. Would you like to hear how the mix is—

Kaeya: Make it clear to Venti that I don’t want him to handle my album. I already have you for that role, after all.

Albedo: Is that not obvious to him?

Kaeya: Well, he’s quite the persistent one. Venti’s fame as an audio engineer… is dangerous for these tracks.

Albedo: You… do understand that once the album is released, he will have access to it like everyone else?

Kaeya: Albedo, think of it this way. He’s an engineer and a poet. How long do you think it’ll take him to decipher the symbolisms in the track titles alone?

Albedo: Symbolism and literary devices are not within my field of study, but I imagine Venti would have little difficulty with them.

Kaeya: Right, so you get it.

Albedo: Are you uncomfortable with the idea?

Kaeya: …

Albedo: Forgive me. I won’t pry any further.

Kaeya: Best of luck on the mix.

Albedo: Relax. Have faith in my abilities as an engineer. You have delivered your emotions; the final product’s quality will not undermine them.

Venti, an audio engineer: I know every song from the past and present, and the ones that have yet to be released!

I guess you can even call me… the 🍃God of Music🍃, ehe

Diluc, metal guitarist & songwriter:

Rosaria, also metal songwriter, who Venti has mixed for: He’s not lying this time

🦚

“Oculus” / Kaeya (jazz & funk guitarist & songwriter)

produces groovy tracks with smooth vocals

often puts symbolism in titles

lyrics seem to have lots of hidden subtext that nearly noone can understand

I’m not sure what his fashion sense would be

Used to be part of a pop unit “burning-ii” with Diluc until a certain argument

🔥

“Noctua” / Diluc (metal guitarist & songwriter)

produces heavy tracks with surprisingly classy vocals

No who am I kidding. He’d absolutely go all out: high-tension vocals, growls if he feels like it. Energy matches his music. The idea is: power.

(Kinda like the whole Diluc/Darknight Hero persona. Calm and professional as “Diluc”, aggressive and unrestrained as “Noctua”)

titles almost always have something to do with birds and flames and dawn

lyrics are so straightforward you could read him like an open book

formal and reserved fashion sense despite his works’ aesthetic

Used to be part of a pop unit “burning-ii” with Kaeya until a certain argument

🥀

“DarkRose” / Rosaria (metal songwriter)

Good friends with Oculus

vocals are cool/chilling/low & smooth-sounding but it’s part of her charm (something like MEMAI SIREN’s vocalist, whose voice I love very much <3)

It balances well with the heavy instrumental

Flowing black clothing with some small spikes and chains here and there

🍃

Venti (audio engineer & poet)

famous audio engineer who claims to be the “God of Songs”

Very flexible with genres despite the indie-pop musician appearance

Comfortable outfit of pastel greens, beige, and browns, lots of charms here and there

Also a poet but does it as a side thing

💫

“Kreideprinz” / Albedo (audio engineer, graphic designer & illustrator)

more well-known for his visual works than audio works (despite the former being a side job and the latter being more high-quality)

Does not care for fame and simply enjoys the mediums

became an audio engineer because he likes the technical aspect of bringing the tracks together in harmony

black and white with gold accents, basically his canon outfit but a bit more techwear-like style

Diluc Ragnvindr & Kaeya Alberich, aka “burning-ii” — pop

1st Single: Together With Our Hands

Vocals/Lyrics: Diluc Ragnvindr, Kaeya Alberich

Music: Diluc Ragnvindr, Crepus Ragnvindr

Arrangement: Crepus Ragnvindr

Mixing/Mastering: Adelinde

Visuals: Kaeya Alberich, Crepus Ragnvindr

1st Album: Dear Winds on High

Vocals/Lyrics/Music: Diluc Ragnvindr, Kaeya Alberich

Arrangement: Diluc Ragnvindr, Venti

Mixing/Mastering: Crepus Ragnvindr

Visuals: Kaeya Alberich

2nd Album: Mondstadt KNights

Vocals/Lyrics/Music: Diluc Ragnvindr, Kaeya Alberich

Arrangement: Kaeya Alberich, Venti

Mixing/Mastering: Jean Gunnhildr

Visuals: Kreideprinz, Kaeya Alberich

Kaeya Alberich, aka “Oculus” — jazz & funk

Debut Album: Death After Noon

Vocals/Lyrics/Music/Arrangement: Oculus

Mixing/Mastering/Visuals: Kreideprinz

1. Confidante

2. A Million Reflections

3. Death After Noon

4. Treasure Hoarders (Such As I)

5. Crystal Steps

6. The Only Checkmate

7. Angel’s Share, Not Mine

8. The Knight, the Pawn, the Uncrowned King

9. Arctic Abyss

10. The Peacock Tail’s the Start of It All

11. Grape Juice, So Unromantic

12. If Only I Could Right My Wrongs

Diluc Ragnvindr, aka “Noctua” — heavy metal

Debut Album: Burning Dawn

Vocals/Lyrics/Music/Arrangement: Noctua

Mixing/Mastering: Venti

Visuals: Albedo

1. Justice

2. In Spite of the Night

3. Burning Dawn

4. Mortem Crepus

5. Always So Inefficient

6. Flying Embers in the Rain

7. Delusional Vision

8. Abyssal Intel

9. Falcon’s Return

10. Phoenix Reborn

11. Wind God, Always

12. With These Hands of Mine

Somehow, the track names imply that either Kaeya and Diluc really like mythology and metaphors, or wind gods and the abyss order still exists… in this modern AU- Don’t think too hard about it haha

#dusk fan writing #I remembered this joke again #the first one #but I don’t really have much energy to make stories for AUs so…#if you’re interested feel free to make something based off of this idea?#Kaeya #Diluc #Rosaria #venti #albedo #crepus ragnvindr #adelinde #genshin impact #mondstadt songwriter au #Genshin au #modern au #genshin idol au #??#long post

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gidakata · 4 days

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[DRABBLE ANALYSIS NOTES; FIC BREAKDOWN] Crack Baby (you don't know what you want)

the fic the song

its minyang!

anyway I already cross-posted it to twt & ao3, so I kind of just wanted to post the end author's notes, which was a breakdown of my thought process and the beats I tried to hit when writing the fic, inspired by the song... crack baby by mitski lmfao anyway! I really enjoyed this actually, and I want to do more of these song-fic analysis stuff where I like. breakdown the lyrics/scene and explain what I attempted to go for, where, and why, etc etc etc yk? this was so fun and I love these little writer exercises also im a slut for repetition.

Anyway;

(TW // drug ment.) Crack Baby by Mitski has a literal reference, paralleling its meaning; the first is an obvious reference to the lyrics and song title “Crack Baby”, or a child who’s mother used cocaine while they where pregnant, so the baby is born with withdrawal symptoms. The second, being the parallel Mitski draws; a longing for a feeling or situation that one’s nostalgic for but cannot fully place.

I used it for a relationship; being possibly aimless in it, and afterwards realizing you lost something that was integral to you. Being confused on if you want the relationship back (ex; there were reasons why it ended), or if you miss the secure feeling it provided, even if it didn’t provide security. Either way; you miss something you once had.

In relation to how I applied this to the fic;

…all these twenty years trying to fill the void; Single now, focusing on his child (that he used to raise partially, with Jeongin), Minho spends his life in relative loneliness. He tries his best for his child, but Seungmin clearly struggles in school with just Minho as his parent. There is a clear void meant to be filled, but by another parent, or partner, it’s undecided.

Crack baby, you don’t know what you want; following the previous sentiment, it’s clear Minho struggles with deciding between whether or not he wants another person in the house in general - someone who serves as parent for Seungmin, and partner for himself. Other parents call him Mr. Lee and he doesn’t correct them- and he tells himself it’s for the sake of Seungmin.

…but you know that you had it once, and you know that you want it back; Jeongin filled those gaps so perfectly when he was a part of the household, Minho isn’t over it. Running into him in the street quickly becomes a seamless co-parenting session with Seungmin, and Seungmin warms up to Jeongin quickly by repeating the pebble-prank he previously played on his dad in the park. Minho also admits he hasn’t moved any of Jeongin’s things from when he left.

…and you know that you need it bad; Minho is hinted at to be overworked and overtired in mismatched business-casual clothing, Seungmin’s ability to be semi-self sufficient, and the New Years decorations that have been up nearly year round. His P.O.V. is permeated in a sort of loneliness. Some help- a partnership of any sort- is something he would heavily benefit from.

Wild horses running through your hollow bones; Minho impulsively chases the feeling of having Jeongin in his home, and Jeongin in his vicinity again, inviting him over for dinner. Jeongin tells Seungmin that Minho and Seungmin seem to be doing fine- much to Minho’s dismay. He bathes in the high that the night provides him, reminiscing on the days that he and Jeongin used to share, when Seungmin was just a baby.

Tumblr is my dump page where I shit post my excess thoughts into the void or not idk anyway thanks for listening! I was actually struggling to keep this one just a drabble, which I wanted to do bc I yap too much (my current ongoing fic easily reaching 80k+ despite being written in a little under a month), so I rlly enjoyed being able to think this out and still have it end up under 3k!! idk!! kjfhkjsf

also we just need more dad!minho plsplspls beggin my fellow authors

#stray kids #fanfic #stray kids fanfic #minyang #lee minho #skz fic #yang jeongin #ao3fic #yona yaps #OOOH BABE WAKE UP NEW TAG JUST DROPPED LMFAO

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paintedlight · 3 years

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posted my favorite chapter of Some Say Love is a Burning Thing last night!! ❤️🔥🤪❤️‍🔥

#love and destruction babyyyyyy #zukka #zukka fic #atla fic #some say love is a burning thing #ssliabt #it’s what the lyric title was inspired by if it isn’t obvious #also… only 6 more chapters left to write… only like 18k words left… ok that’s a lot but still!!

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bluewinnerangel · 3 years

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Hiii, I read your Louis 28 songs lining up with H’s albums post a while ago - honestly that boy is ridiculous I couldn’t stop laughing - and with the sunflower vol 6 comparison, the first line of the equivalent song ‘come away from the window’ immediately made me think of flowers in the window by travis. There’s this Twitter thread about the 2 songs. Don’t know if it really links any further than just the title but thought I’d put it out there. Have a lovely day!!

Okay BUCKLE UP. I too realised this a while back and have wanted to add that to the post since but whenever I try to edit that monster, tumblr’s just like I can’t hear you lalalala and just...doesn’t save the edit. Anyways! I’m gonna use this ask to talk about this, about ALL THIS (yeah this is why it took me so long to answer this ask, sorry anon) because Oh Boi have I wanted to talk about this.

First up, little recap of that twitter thread: Harry really loves the song Travis - Flowers in the window. He has called it his favorite song in 2011 on twitter, again in a 2012 interview, put it on his top 10 all time songs mixtape in 2016, and in 2018 named this song when asked what he’d want played at his funeral.

The linked twitter thread goes on to find parallels between this song to a bunch of 1D/Harry songs, but I just want to focus on Sunflower vol. 6, because this song seems to be very very very inspired by Flowers in the Window. Both songs describe going through different stages (it’s been ages come so far fro-) with someone, each chorus using the same words and buildup but slightly altered to change its meaning, placing them further down into a timeline, later timepoints in a relationship. It’s as if inbetween verse and chorus time passes where stuff happens but that stuff isn’t included in the song, just the feelings and how they slightly change and grow over time, always still including the same amount of love. They’re both really cute lovesongs that compare their love/loved one with flowers and stages of growth. Besides that there are really obvious links in terms of lyrics too, the most obvious being “plant new seeds and watch them grow” vs “plant new seeds in the melody”, but also “there’s no reason to feel bad” vs “I don’t wanna make you feel bad”. Both lyrics with the mentioned lyrics highlighted (Sorry it’s ugly):

(hold on I'm not done)

(Am I getting to the point? Not before sidetracking 28 more times:) I have a lot more to say about Sunflower vol. 6. The gallery lyrics for one!? (not mine but I screamed in the tags idk does that count)

EDIT: for a full lyric breakdown @ialwaysknewyouwerepunk just posted this awesome analysis of Sunflower vol 6!

I’m also entirely convinced it’s placed both before and after Two Ghosts. Basically, when he takes this sharp loud inhale about 1,5 mins into the song, that’s where you could just plop down Two Ghosts. (you could say, he’s about to jump into the water, about to swim in the glass half-empty, I know now I’m just going too far but eh), then when Two Ghosts ends we’re coming back to Sunflower at “your flower just died”, the aftermath of their first “things were good and now they’re not” that is Two Ghosts, (or: the dying of the sunflower is described in Two Ghosts) but now we’re moving on and the story continues, where he is still wanting to get to know the person, wanting to start over, “I’m still tongue tied”, and so on. Lemme just stop rambling and actually convince you, really, because he links the 2 songs through the lyrics:

Two Ghosts: Tongue-tied like we've never known Sunflower vol. 6: I was just / I’m still tongue-tied

Two Ghosts: Tastes so sweet, looks so real, sounds like something that I used to feel, but I can't touch what I see // Trying to remember what it feels to have a heartbeat Sunflower vol. 6: Sometimes / Sunflowers just died, keep it sweet in your memory (This one isn’t as clear as the other two, but, it’s sweet, and he remembers now)

Two Ghosts: The fridge light washes this room white, moon dances over your good side (kitchen + dancing + night) Sunflower vol. 6: Kiss in the kitchen like it's a dance floor, I couldn’t want you any more tonight (hey it’s kitchen + dancing + night!)

Side-side-sidetrack: To make matters worse, I also think Two Ghosts was a great attempt at weaving lyrics in such a way that the majority of it can be applied to both the beard (or PR stunt counterpart, Taylor in this case) as well as the real deal (Mr haha 28 haha 369 haha you read into things lololol I hate him), and that this kitchen dancing in the night thing was initially a nudge to miss Swift, as in All Too Well she sings:

Cause there we are again in the middle of the night, We're dancing 'round the kitchen in the refrigerator light

All Too Well being on the album Red, the album the whole Haylor stunt was for from her side, written before she knew H, was supposed to be about Jake, just think about the logic of H taking that lyric and using it to describe their relationship and how idiotically strange that would be if it wasn’t a stunt. And there are more nudges like it, but, I don’t think I should sidetrack even further. Let’s just quickly pause and try to consider Sunflower being about Camille and Two Ghosts about Taylor and then H using the same words and descriptions for each relationship that were 7 years apart while his albums clearly show he absolutely doesn’t lack the ability to songwrite and... use new words... and describe things... like with range and stuff... just sayin....

TLDR: these songs link on purpose and here is a 28-boop-hint why. Now we can go back to Flowers in the Window vs Sunflower Vol 6 and what the hell it has to do with Louis’ playlist.

In case someone bumps into this without reading the longass deranged puzzle of Louis’ 28 songs playlist possibly hiding Fine Line (But if you do, I’m so sorry for everything, you’ll be here forever, I’m so sorry), a brief summary:

Ok no a serious summary: in 2019 Louis made a public playlist called “28 Songs”, that included, you guessed it, 28 songs. In the initial version uploaded in february @sexatoxbridge high fived god with the reach that the lil shit lined up the start of the playlist to HS1 (here, my addition here)

Louis later on changed up the songs a couple of times throughout the year, putting emphasis on “a fresh set of bangers” on the last update in October (the day before announcing Walls, and Fine Line was announced less than 2 weeks after that)

And when I started listening to this playlist late to the party after knowing Fine Line pretty well, I was like mfer did done it again. The first 3 songs seemed to line up with Fine Line, and the remaining fit as well, but just, scrambled. I did make a case for it being lined up with a draft version of the Fine Line album, but now thinking about it (the whole thing being a massive reach, but within a reach that one really took off well into space), it makes more sense that he just hussled them, I mean, I kinda doubt H wouldn’t be set on an album order less than 2 weeks before announcing it? Either way, I was able to find a buddy for each song a little all too well, with at first sight Sunflower vol. 6 pairing up with Ten Tonnes - Lucy being the weakest link, other than “under the sun, I’m calling where you belong” = a sunflower? Not “resolving” that shit haunted me for way too long and I attempted to crack it (copy-paste from the 28 songs post:)

Sunflower vol 6 tells a story of starting over as it first goes through wanting to be close to someone, then having them, but then “your flowers just died, plant new seeds in the melody” (+ Stage 6 of sunflowers starts a new cycle/pollination). In Lucy, someone is two steps away from the singer, in a place they left their faith/got burned (H: your flowers just died), and the singer is telling them to not stay in that place, pick their faith back up (H: plant new seeds in the melody) and come back into his arms (H: let me inside, I wanna get to know you).

And I thought I had found peace. Wrong. Fast forward

it hit me. And it hit anon as well.

Lucy pairs with Sunflower’s inpiration, with Flowers in the Window.

So the above crack-attempt still stands, as all 3 songs share this theme, but in terms of lyrics there isn’t much overlap between Lucy and Sunflower vol. 6.

H O W E V E R

Travis: Flowers in the window Lucy: Come away from the window

Travis: When I first held you, I was cold, a melting snowman, I was told Lucy: Frost is glowing, on the glass, where you left your faith

Travis: But there was no one there to hold Lucy: I'm calling where you belong, You're crawling back to my arms

It.... it just goes on like that. I tried to color code things that seemed similar and welp mostly failed I think because the whole thing is just very similar. It starts off describing cold, with someone holding someone else in the past, but not now, basically wanting warmth back, the you/Lucy being in a place holding onto negative feelings (that the singer seems to know well or is wise about) over things that happened in time periods that aren’t described in the song itsself, telling the you/person that there’s time, but please don’t be long, there is time to change and grow into something better, with Lucy at a timepoint of being a bit further removed from the singer, as compared to Flowers in the Window (actually that part fits better with Sunflower vol. 6). If you told me Travis and Lucy are in a relationship I mean look at this shit...

Long story short either I’m insane or Louis is but probably both.

#sorry for this #honestly this cant have enough memes to cope with the level of insanity going on here #welikeparallels #smart things with lyrics #gayvinci code #sunflower vol 6 #FL #flowers in the window #mixtape #two ghosts #28 boops bitch

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taeyongdoyoung · 3 years

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summary: wanting to impress the cute zookeeper feeding the monkeys, you lie about your field of studies. once the truth is revealed, it is too late to take it back. but even when you’re being honest, your boyfriend doesn’t seem to believe you. little did you know you should have listened to that story about the boy who cried wolf...

pairing: jimin x reader

genre: ANGST, smut, a hint of fluff

warnings: lying (in case it wasn’t obvious from the title), punishment, spanking (with a belt), bondage (with a necktie), bruises, crying, aftercare, a lot of trust issues, yelling, jealousy, biting, mentions of blood, marking, hickeys, possessiveness, blowjob, slapping, hair-pulling, sexist assumptions, implied angry sex, unplanned pregnancy, mentions of cheating, unfair accusations, breaking up, trust issues resolved, making up, ambiguous ending

author’s note: happy jimin day, everyone! ❤️ here’s a little something to celebrate it. just a disclaimer, i don’t condone lying and toxic relationships and i in no way associate my writings with the actual jimin. i just used the song lyrics for inspiration. without further ado, hope yall enjoy this story ❤️

word count: 5.3k

The lie that’s gotten too big Is trying to swallow me up Caught in a lie Find the me that was innocent

You were having fun on your annual visit to the zoo with your best friend Tessa (it was tradition between you two) when you spotted a really attractive guy feeding the monkeys. He seemed so sweet and attentive towards the adorable animals that you couldn’t help but feel an immediate attraction towards him.

“Oh my gosh, this zookeeper is sooo cute,” you whispered in your bestie’s ear.

“I mean, sure, but he’s not really my type,” Tessa responded, remaining forever loyal to her boyfriend. “Why don’t you go talk to him?”

“What am I even going to say?” you sighed. “We don’t have much in common.”

“You can’t know for sure unless you give it a try,” she encouraged you.

You shrugged, finding her suggestion sensible enough, and approached the handsome zookeeper.

“Hello there,” you greeted him cheerfully. “That sign over there says don’t feed the monkeys,” you joked.

“Well, it obviously doesn’t apply to me, since I work here,” the guy chuckled lightly.

“Um, yeah,” you replied. “Sorry, that was silly of me. Actually, I’m studying biology and I’m on a field trip to learn more about monkeys. And what they like eating.”

You didn’t know what came over you to utter such a blatant lie. You were actually studying acting. So, it was extremely easy for you to fool the attractive stranger. But you just wanted to impress him or find something to talk about. And the lie left your lips before you could think twice about it.

“Oh, really? Well, monkeys are omnivores, so they pretty much eat anything,” the zookeeper explained. “Many people think they just eat bananas but that’s far from the truth. They also enjoy fruits, seeds, small insects and lizards.”

“Wow, that’s really helpful, thank you so much,” you responded in amazement.

“Do you...maybe...want to feed them some strawberries?” he offered generously.

“Isn’t that...against the rules?” you mumbled nervously.

“Technically, it is, but since I just explained what they eat, I’m sure I can turn a blind eye to this tiny transgression,” he teased.

“Ah, that’d be amazing, it’s really sweet of you to offer,” you said, taking the plate of strawberries the zookeeper gave you and giving the red fruits to the monkeys. After they were done feeding, you asked boldly: “How can I repay you for your kindness?”

“By letting me feed you instead?”

“Huh?”

“Dinner,” he elaborated. “Let me take you out for dinner.”

You grinned excitedly, immediately accepting his suggestion.

“I’m Jimin, by the way,” he introduced himself.

“I’m Y/N,” you replied, shaking his hand. “It’s really nice to meet you.”

“How are we going to arrange the time and place for our dinner date?” Jimin inquired. “Are you on social media?”

“Um, no,” you lied, only getting deeper into this mess. If you told him your social media accounts, he would immediately know you were, in fact, not studying biology, but acting. “You can have my number, though.”

“That’s good enough for me,” Jimin smiled sweetly. Exchanging numbers, you parted ways.

Going back to your best friend Tessa, who was a couple of metres away, you saw her giving you a thumbs up. Obviously, she hadn’t heard your conversation, but judging from the smile on your face, it went well. Soon enough, however, you cracked.

“I think I made a terrible mistake,” you confessed. “I lied to him that I’m studying biology and that I don’t have social media accounts.”

“What did you do that for?” Tessa seemed confused by your life choices. “I mean...why?”

“I don’t know, I panicked we wouldn’t have anything to talk about,” you shook your head.

“And if things get serious, how are you going to explain that?” Tessa argued.

“No idea. I guess I’ll figure something out.”

“My advice is you tell him on your first date.”

“There wouldn’t be a second date if I do,” you pointed out.

“You can’t know that,” Tessa continued trying to convince you to do the right thing.

“I’ll be fine,” you tried to reassure yourself more than her.

Once the time for dinner with Jimin arrived, you had come up with hundreds of questions for him so that you wouldn’t have to talk about yourself. Luckily, Jimin was great at holding a conversation and sharing funny stories about the animals he was attending to. However, at one point, he switched the focus on you. Being a gentleman, Jimin insisted that it was impolite of him to do all the talking. And of course, he had to bring up your lie.

“Tell me more about your major.”

Despite knowing it was wrong, you’d come prepared, having done some research in biology. So, you only continued to lie harder through your teeth in your misplaced attempts to impress him. After the first one, it became progressively easier to keep lying and build a whole fake persona for yourself. By the end of the night, it was obvious Jimin was having a lovely time. And even though you were enjoying yourself, as well, the guilt was threatening to consume you. Just as you were trying to find a way to come clean, he offered going out again two days from now, so you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him the truth...

One month later

Things were going quite smoothly for you and Jimin. You two would talk about all sorts of things such as music, books and films, so it was almost easy to forget your lies. Until one night. You two were watching a movie at his place when you had to go to the bathroom. And made one fatal mistake. Leaving your phone on the table. Who would have thought a notification from Facebook group chat Acting Class (exposing your two major lies about studying biology and not having social media at once) just as Jimin was reaching across the table to grab a snack? Who would have thought it’d grab his attention, make him question everything he knew, or thought he knew about you?

When you returned from the bathroom, you could immediately tell he was angry by the look on his face.

“Why did you lie to me?” Jimin confronted you. “You said you were studying biology and that you’re not on social media. Well, your Facebook account seems to disagree with both these statements.”

“I’m really sorry,” you replied dumbly. “I just wanted to impress you.”

“I get why you lied at the zoo,” he shook his head in disappointment. “But why didn’t you tell me at our first date? We’ve been going out for a whole month, Y/N, and you continued to lie to me.”

“Because I was dreading the conversation we’re currently having,” you admitted. “I like you too much and didn’t want to let you down.”

“Well, congratulations, you played yourself,” Jimin replied coldly.

“What will it take for you to give me a second chance?” you whined.

“Take off your clothes,” he orderded.

“W-what?” you whispered in shock. You were pretty sure the situation was anything but sexual.

“Did I stutter?” Jimin hissed.

Gone was the bubbly sweetheart you had fallen for. His demeanour did a 180 degree turn and you figured the wisest thing would be to do as he said. Removing your clothes while standing, Jimin was comfortably seated on the couch, shooting daggers at you. You felt uncharacteristically vulnerable. The reason why you liked acting so much was that it was easy to put on a mask and be someone else for a change. While with relationships, you had to be open - open to share and open to get hurt. And it was your mistake that you had incorporated the element of acting into your relationship.

“Lie on your stomach,” he commanded you, getting up from the couch and then, added a joke. “Pun-intended.”

Even though it was objectively quite funny, you were certainly not in the mood to laugh. Doing as he wished, you saw with your peripheral vision that Jimin was removing his necktie. Soon enough, he used it to bind your wrists tightly. And before you could register what was happening, he took off his belt. Hearing the sound of metal and leather in the air, you shuddered, already anticipating what was to come. Proving your suspicions to be correct, Jimin landed the first blow on your bare ass. You flinched a bit when the leather part of his belt made contact with your skin. He used one hand to hold your legs down so that you wouldn’t move too much. You’d never felt so humiliated in your entire life but you imagined that must have been how he felt when he discovered you’d been lying to him. Jimin kept spanking you with the help of the belt until your butt was painted red and you whimpered in pain. You had started counting in your head but after the thirtieth hit you’d lost count. Eventually, he noticed your tear-streaked face and messed up mascara, choosing to stop. Untying your hands, Jimin traced a finger down your wet cheeks.

“Am I forgiven yet?” you asked in a small voice, blinking at him innocently.

“Oh dear, oh dear, my angel,” his angry self immediately vanished and Jimin was back to being the softest boyfriend. Hugging you sweetly, he wrapped a giant blanket around you, caressing your hair. “Of course you’re forgiven. Just don’t lie to me ever again. Be my good girl and you’ll have no reason to worry.”

“What if it’s a white lie?” you pouted. “For example, let’s say you’re wearing a dreadful shirt and you ask me what I think. If I say it looks great, ‘cause I don’t want to hurt your feelings, does that count?”

“Darling, you would never catch me wearing a dreadful shirt,” Jimin smirked, confident in his sense of fashion. “And yes, it counts. I want you to tell me the truth about anything or next time you won’t get away with such a light punishment. Am I making myself clear?”

If the belt thing was considered light punishment, you feared to see how much worse it could get. So, you agreed with his demands immediately.

“I won’t ever lie to you, Jimin, I promise,” you vowed sincerely, burying your head into his chest. “I really want to be your good girl and make you proud.”

“I’m counting on it, angel,” he kissed your forehead softly.

Three months later

Things were going great. After the incident when you’d gotten caught in a lie about your actual studies and having social media accounts, you and Jimin were more than happy together. He was the sweetest, most accepting boyfriend and you were the epitome of honesty and truthfulness. It was almost picture-perfect.

But all that changed one night. You were chilling at a bar with your bestie when Jimin suddenly texted you, asking if you were free to hang out.

You: Sorry, I can’t right now. I’m out with my bestie, celebrating the end of the semester 🤪🎉🍷

Jimin: Oh, alright. Have fun, then! ❤️

You: Tomorrow I’m all yours, though 💋

Jimin: Can’t wait, babe 😏

You forgot all about your exact phrasing until the following day came and you met up with Jimin at his place. Excited about spending more time with him, you couldn’t help but grin in anticipation. However, the second you noticed his grim expression, the smile disappeared from your face.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” you asked cautiously, wrapping your hands around his neck. To your utter dismay, he pushed you away, a little more harshly than you deserved.

“What’s this?” Jimin wanted to know, showing you a couple of pictures of you and your best friend Damian he must have posted last night. Most of them were of the fancy drinks you two were sharing, as well as the cool setting at the bar. But in one of them, Damian was kissing your cheek.

“Um, photos, duh,” you chuckled, thinking the answer to your boyfriend’s question was ridiculously obvious.

“I can see that,” he replied angrily. “I thought you were out with Tessa. Why did you lie?”

“I didn’t lie,” you explained, already growing exasperated.

“Tessa is your best friend,” Jimin pointed out. “Who is this Damian guy?”

“Yes, Tessa is my best friend. But so is Damian. You can’t expect me to pit one amazing friend against another. Damian is my bestie just as much as Tessa is.”

“Yeah, well, why the fuck was he kissing you, then?” Jimin spat out and you immediately guessed what this was all about. It wasn’t about you “lying” as he’d assumed. He was jealous.

You couldn’t help but giggle, finding the very idea of you and Damian extremely amusing.

“Is this funny to you? I’m dead serious, answer me,” Jimin insisted, visibly upset.

“Yes, it is funny to me,” you rolled your eyes. “First of all, not that it’s any of your business, but Damian plays for the other team, so you don’t need to feel threatened.”

“I don’t feel threatened,” he replied, still sounding pissed.

“Second of all,” you continued. “It’s completely natural to kiss your friends on the cheeks.”

“I don’t kiss my friends on the cheeks,” Jimin grunted.

“Well, that’s not my problem, is it?” you teased.

“How would you feel? If you saw a picture of me kissing another girl’s cheek?”

You shrugged. You were definitely not the type to get jealous easily.

“I wouldn’t even bring it up,” you responded honestly. “Because I trust you. And you obviously don’t.”

Jimin shook his head, suddenly feeling like he was the one being attacked.

“I do trust you, it’s just that I was surprised and I jumped to conclusions...”

“I’m all yours, you know that, right?” you ran a hand through his hair, attempting to reassure him.

“God, you’re so frustrating,” he hissed under his breath and kissed you hungrily, biting your lower lip until it drew blood, as if to claim you.

You quickly gave in, allowing him to mark your mouth and your neck as he pleased, knowing that it would make him feel good about himself. Biting really hard into your skin until you were certain you’d have hickeys, Jimin took the “I’m all yours” part of your sentence a bit too literally.

“You’re mine. No one else’s,” he whispered with determination. And you simply nodded, agreeing with his words. “On your knees, darling.”

You hurried to follow his order, because you knew that if you acted like a brat, it would only get worse for you.

“Open your pretty little mouth for me,” Jimin commanded and you did as he asked obediently, taking his cock into your mouth. After a while, you realized this wasn’t you giving him a blowjob, this was pretty much him fucking your face at an unrelenting pace. Occasionally slapping you lightly and pulling your hair firmly. He came into your mouth about three times. Eventually, he stopped. But only when he noticed your eyes were red from all the crying and your lips were trembling with the effort of keeping your mouth open. After he was done humiliating you, Jimin’s gentle side seemed to return.

Pulling you up on your feet and cuddling you on his bed and kissing your slightly bruised skin, your mind was dizzy with contradictory thoughts. You knew that objectively you hadn’t done anything that bad. And yet, the way Jimin was treating you proved that you had, in fact, fucked up. Despite that, something just didn’t sit right with you. Even though a part of you enjoyed being treated like his slut, you couldn’t understand why he was punishing you despite you being nothing but truthful towards him ever since the biology incident. But you couldn’t put it into words. Until it was too late...

One year later

You had landed your first acting job. Even though you’d be just an extra in this movie one of your former professors had been working on, you were super excited about it. And any normal boyfriend would have been happy for you. But unfortunately, one tiny mistake in your past continued to haunt you in your present.

“Hii, babe, I have great news! I got my first acting job,” you told him as soon as you found out, expecting him to at least smile or give you a pat on the head. No such thing happened.

“How did you get a job so quickly after graduating?” Jimin asked you in suspicion instead of congratulating you.

“I mean, one of my former professors is the director of the movie and he wanted to support the beginning of his students’ careers. It’s really sweet of him, don’t you think?”

“Did you like...blow him or something?” he scoffed.

“Jimin, how could you say that? First of all, I would never do something like that. Second of all, is this how little you think of me? You think I’m not perfectly capable of landing a job?” you snapped at him, feeling quite dejected by his words.

“I was just kidding,” he rolled his eyes. “No need to get so butt-hurt about it.”

“Butt-hurt? I just don’t get why you don’t trust me, we’ve been together for more than a year. If this is about the biology thing, I apologized hundreds of times. You seriously need to let it go.”

“Well, I can’t. If you’re so successful at lying to me once, what’s to stop you from doing it again?”

What Jimin said really hurt you. So much that you couldn’t stand the thought of being in the same room as him, let alone share the same bed (since you’d moved in with him two months ago).

“I need some time to think about us. Just...I’m gonna clear my head.”

He simply nodded and didn’t try to stop you. When you got outside and were left alone with your thoughts, you kept remembering similar situations where Jimin would attack you for the littlest things. And even though you had not lied to him since the biology incident, he still seemed incapable of trusting you. And it was honestly so frustrating. You couldn’t understand why he was still with you if he didn’t believe a word you said. It made you feel terrible about yourself and about your relationship as a whole. Just when you were starting to think about whether or not breaking up would be the healthiest decision for both of you, your phone buzzed with message notifications.

Jimin: I’m really sorry, angel

Jimin: I know I overreacted earlier

Jimin: I trust you, I really do. And I’m not just saying it ‘cause you left

Jimin: I will try to do better, I promise

Jimin: Please, come back, let’s talk.

Jimin: And if you don’t want to talk, we can just cuddle

Jimin: Or do anything you feel like doing

Jimin: Fuck, I miss you already

And as hurt as you felt, you knew you would come back. Jimin always knew just what to say to make things right. And you couldn’t imagine your life without him in it. So, you texted back:

You: I’m on my way

And talk you did. Jimin really apologized for not believing you and kept reassuring you he would refrain himself from overreacting again. And you trusted him. That was your second biggest mistake. The first was lying that first and only time. After you talked, he used the one weapon that instantly disarmed you. One that he knew you couldn’t fight against. One that always had you asking for more...

Three years later

You were so forgetful. When you were younger, people kept warning you that being that forgetful would work against you some day. But you never listened. And now that you were staring at the two little lines, you wished you’d listened. Wished you hadn’t forgotten to drink your pill. These damn lines. You felt like they were mocking you.

When Jimin returned home from work, you were all panicky and awkward and jumpy. You would have to find the right time to tell him. But he seemed so tired. Maybe you’d wait until tomorrow. Or the weekend. Yes, that would be better. He was more relaxed on the weekends. As you were mentally preparing yourself for the moment you’d have to utter those three little words out loud, you unconsciously kept avoiding his gaze.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Jimin wanted to know, sounding worried.

“N-nothing,” you answered, not sure if it was the truth. On the one hand, you were happy about the news you’d discovered. On the other, you were really nervous how to share them with Jimin. You’d talked about the subject in the past but it was always as a joke or as something that was to happen in the distant future. Only it didn’t seem that much distant now.

“Are you lying to me again?” he asked. Well, of course that’s the first thing that came to his mind. Classic Jimin, the king of trust issues.

“Jimin, stop,” you shook your head, disappointed. “Just because I’m not ready to talk about something does not automatically mean I’m lying.”

“Just tell me the truth right now and I won’t get mad, I promise,” he tried to coax you into letting it out. “I won’t even punish you for it.”

He was unbelievable. You hadn’t done anything wrong to deserve getting punished!

“Well, congratulations, you ruined a perfectly happy moment. I’m fucking pregnant, are you happy now?” you angrily replied.

“Is it...someone else’s? Is that why you’ve been acting so jittery?”

“Are you insane?” you yelled. “I would never cheat on you.”

“Then you wouldn’t have a problem doing a paternity test?”

“You can’t be serious,” you whispered, feeling more disappointed than ever.

“Do I look like I’m joking?” Jimin responded coldly.

“Do you trust me so little that you would immediately assume I’m capable of cheating on you?”

“Have you given me reason to trust you?”

You shook your head, absolutely disheartened.

“Fine. We’ll do your stupid paternity test. But once you see the proof that you’re the father, we’re done. You can see the baby occasionally if you wish, but us, that’s over. I can’t be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t believe me. I don’t want my child to grow up in such a distrusting environment.”

“You can’t be serious,” Jimin murmured, unintentionally repeating your words.

“Do I look like I’m joking?” you mirrored him, even acting out his exact expression, giving him a taste of his own medicine.

When the results were out, there were no surprises. Like you’d said, Jimin was, in fact, the father. But despite your earlier threats, once you spotted Jimin tearing up upon seeing the little fetus via the ultrasound, you forgot all about it.

“Please, please, I promise you, I’ll treasure you and the babe so much,” he practically begged you to not put an end on your relationship.

And you knew he was telling the truth. So, you gave him one more chance.

Nine months later

When you first held your child in your arms, you were so overwhelmed with affection for the little Sunhee that you knew it in your heart that your daughter deserved better. Deserved to be loved and trusted unconditionally. And even though Jimin had been nothing but caring and sweet throughout your pregnancy, you still couldn’t forget how quickly he’d judged you back then, how he’d even went so far as to accuse you of cheating. And how much that hurt you.

So, you made a decision. Maybe it was a little impulsive, but in that moment, you felt like it was the right one. You would wait until Jimin was asleep, leave a letter explaining your choice and run away from the hospital. You’d go back to your family’s place. You knew they would be understanding and be supportive of your decision.

As for the letter itself, that was what it said:

Dear Jimin,

By the time you wake up, Sunhee and I will be out of the hospital. Please, don’t look for us. You might find us but that’s not the point. I need to be away from you for now. Don’t worry, I’m not a monster and of course, you’ll be able to see your daughter. I’m just asking you to give me some time alone. You owe me that much.

If you’re wondering what I’m referring to, let me spell it out for you. Every time you doubted me or didn’t trust me, even though I was telling the truth, it hurt me. At first I tried to shrug it off and even blamed myself for being so sensitive. For example, when you confronted me about hanging out with Damian or about landing a job so quickly after graduating.

But when you accused me of cheating on you, when you assumed that you were not Sunhee’s father, that is what hurt the most. It meant that you thought so little of me. And that broke my heart. In a way, I’m not confident is possible of repairing.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not blaming you for what you said or did. We’re all flawed and human, so it’s okay to make mistakes sometimes. After all, I find that I myself am not so innocent and might be partially responsible for our current predicament. Twenty-two-year-old me was so interested in impressing you that she uttered a very stupid lie. One that she regrets everyday.

My point is, all the stuff you said about me cheating, I won’t hold it against you. Life is too short to hold a grudge and I advice you to think about that, as well.

Not for me but for yourself. You’ll find that you can be much happier with an open heart.

Love,

Y/N

One month later

As expected, your parents accepted your decision and told you they’d do anything to help you out. The past month had been difficult, but you were happier than ever. And you truly believed you’d made the right call. Jimin kept calling you and texting you despite your request. For some reason, you couldn’t find it in you to block his number just yet.

At one point, you decided to be the bigger person and let Jimin be around Sunhee for three hours each weekend.. Naturally, you didn’t want to see him, so your parents organized the whole meeting at their place and you always made sure you were somewhere else. You had nothing left to say to him.

One afternoon, you were doing grocery shopping. Usually, you would be inseparable from Sunhee but this time, your parents had convinced you to allow them to have some grandparents-granddaughter bonding time, as they so adorably called it. Which was why you were currently alone at the supermarket. And which was why you ran into someone you didn’t expect to see in your neigbourhood. Judging from the fact he lived twenty minutes away...

“Hi there,” Jimin greeted you, stopping his shopping cart near yours.

“Um, hi,” you responded, already making an escape plan. Could you jump and sprint from the left? Or the right? The lane was too narrow and Jimin’s shopping cart was blocking the away. You mentally reprimanded yourself for being such a dork. You were not a criminal, you didn’t have to run away.

“You look really good,” Jimin smiled nervously. “How...how have you been?”

“I’ve been good,” you uttered blankly. “God, this is so awkward.”

“Tell me about it,” he chuckled, somewhat trying to alleviate the tension. “I was wondering if we could talk.”

“I’ve said what I wanted to say in the letter,” you pointed out.

“But I haven’t,” Jimin replied. “Just hear me out, okay? I know you don’t owe me anything after my atrocious behaviour but...please?”

You nodded, finding it impossible to reject his plea combined with his watery eyes. After all, what harm could listening to him do? You texted your parents that you’d be out for longer than intended and they were absolutely overjoyed they would get to spend more quality time with little Sunhee. You laughed to yourself and followed Jimin on a bench at a park nearby. You didn’t feel comfortable going to his place just then and you felt like having a conversation in a public space was the safest alternative.

“I’m all ears,” you shrugged, awaiting Jimin to say whatever it was he wanted to say.

“First of all, I wanted to apologize for being a total asshole. You didn’t deserve to be treated like that and I’ll forever regret what I said to you.”

You smiled gratefully, finding it like a good sign that he’d realized how much his words had hurt you.

“Second of all, I wanted to admit I’m a hypocrite. And a liar. I’ve never told you about my past relationship and how much it scarred me. My ex-girlfriend had been lying to me for over a year and it turned out she had been cheating on me. So, maybe that’s part of the reason why I have trust issues. I’m not using that as an excuse for how I behaved towards you, I just felt like it was only right to tell you the truth.”

“Thanks, I appreciate you letting me know,” you replied, honestly.

“And third of all, I know I don’t deserve it but could you maybe consider giving me another chance? I promise you I will change for the better and treat you with utmost respect and care. Even if you lie to me, I won’t get mad and attack you.”

“Which I won’t,” you sighed. “Lie, I mean.”

“Even if you do,” Jimin insisted. “We’ll communicate and discuss any problems which might arise like a normal couple instead of me yelling at you or punishing you unjustly.”

“I don’t know, Jimin,” you were still hesitant about all this. “How can I be sure you’re not just saying this? How can I be sure you actually mean it?”

“You can’t,” he grinned sadly and gently took hold of your hand. “But that’s what makes it exciting, don’t you think? Life’s a mystery. We don’t know what will happen in three months or in three years. I don’t know if I’ll make another terrible mistake that might hurt you again. But what I do know is that I am ready to spend the rest of my days atoning for it. And making you and Sunhee happy.”

“Gosh, you really do have a way with words,” you shook your head, already on the verge of giving in and taking him back.

“I’m begging you, angel. This one month without you has been actual hell,” Jimin spoke passionately.

“Let me think about it, okay?” you asked even though you were already certain what your answer would be.

“Can I hug you while you think?” Jimin wanted to know.

“You want to sway me?” you raised your eyebrows. “Go ahead, then.”

“Maybe,” he chuckled mischievously, wrapping his arms around you. “So soft. Just like I remember.”

You closed your eyes contentedly, breathing in his warm embrace. It was impossible to resist him. Even though he had hurt you, this time you were a 100% positive Jimin would do better. You didn’t know what exactly had changed between you two, maybe it was the time spent apart. But it was like some invisible wall of mistrust had been demolished. Leaving nothing but honesty.

A couple of minutes later, Jimin asked:

“Did you make up your mind? Will you give me a second chance?”

“Hm...no,” you joked with a smile on your face.

“Was that a lie?” he teased, already suspecting what you would say next.

“It depends. Do you want it to be?”

“Of course. I want you back,” Jimin pleaded, still holding you tightly.

“Then, yes,” you admitted. “It was a lie.”

The End

#bts #jimin #jimin x reader #bts angst #bts smut #jimin angst #jimin smut #bts x reader #jimin fic #jimin au #writing

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artnachronisme · 3 years

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Going from one BUCK-TICK's album to another in chronological order, something is obvious : the guys did take their time to evolve at first, but once they did, they never stopped. The difference between Aku no Hana (1990), Kurutta Taiyou (1991) Darker than Darkness style 93 (1993) and Six/Nine (1995) is so big, and they published them in 5 years. And what can I say about the albums after 1995 ? Damn. I'm a big fan of their early years from Hurry Up Mode in 1987 to 1989 with Taboo : very straight rock, new wave influenced and punk rock even though they already are very special in their own way thanks to Imai Hisashi's genius and hability to create a harmonious whole . But once Taboo came out everything's changed - Atsushi Sakurai started to write almost all the lyrics and it obviously had an impact on their music.

Aku no Hana is very dark, its inspiration from Charles Baudelaire's Fleurs du Mal had infuse the music and the lyrics very deeply. It's one of my favorite album so far, it's very homogeneous and the sound is definitely my type. Kurutta Taiyou isn't very different if we talk about the sound only, but the atmosphere is something else. You feel how it sounds goth rock more than straight rock. Titles like Taiyou no Korosareta or Jupiter announced the next album very clearly without going out from the album's ambience. Darker than Darkness style 93 is definitely a break up from the past. The introduction song, Kirameki no Naka de... says it clearly : new sounds and experimentations are coming. The third song, Yuuwaku has blues influenced, Dress is a journey to a foreign sound, its structure is extremely special. Funny that the last two were composed by Hideko Hoshino : it's clear that he had a specific vision with these two titles. The album is more industrial, the bass and the drum are quite strong. Finally, when I listen to Six/Nine I'm overwhelmed. Songs like Aikawarazu no "Are" no Katamari ga Nosabaru Hedo no Soko no Fukidamari or Rakuen (Inori Koinegai) are out of this world. For real. So experimental. And if I talk about Misshitsu I'm gonna lose myself. It reminds me of Guns of Brixton by The Clash with its reggae guitar's sound, but darker, obviously. It's crazy how every album is homogeneous in its own way, is consistent despite all the experimentations they did. Also, Atsushi Sakurai improved a lot with his vocals, I love how his voice sometimes "break" or sounds like a deep scream. But I could write about this in details for a long time so... I'll stop here.

The fact is that my favorite band is Pink Floyd, I should be use to experiments and all these type of things when it comes to rock music. I've listened to so many things since my teenage years and my discovery of rock music in general (from classic rock to glam, heavy metal, industrial and everything I could feed myself with - which means a BUNCH of things) but BUCK-TICK hits different everytime and listening to their whole discography at once - meaning during weeks - is quite an experiment too, honestly.

#buck-tick #thoughts #six/nine #aku no hana #darker than darkness style 93 #rock music #music #kurutta taiyou #atsushi sakurai #hidehiko hoshino #hisashi imai #yutaka higuchi #toll yagami #artnachronisme's buck-tick review

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mobagehelllocal · 3 years

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“lucky ending” extra notes i & iii

Hi, I said I would do it but then I released ver i so long ago that I felt I shouldn't do this unless I had another version out at least so yay! finally! ... I'll add ver ii here when I get around to writing it... *shifty eyes* So as usual, this is just my thought process and ideas while writing lol.

*please do not read if you haven’t read “lucky ending” ver i (dorm leaders) & ver iii (rook & lilia).

It was inspired by an anon ask and the button tradition from Japanese schools.

The anon ask went like this: First at all, I like do much your writing and I hope you are doing well. Second, I was wondering what would happen if the MC (Fem!s/o I guess) decided to not go back to her world, like she decide stay with her villain? Can you do make headcanons of this for the dorm leaders? Thank you very much. – from Anonymous

The button tradition, as narrated by the first years, is done when one person confesses and the other responds by giving them the button closest to their heart. In most Japanese uniforms it’s the second uniform, but in Twisted Wonderland--I looked at the ceremonial robes and the closest button should be the fifth. Maybe. I could be wrong.

The songs I listened to while writing this!

The original dorm leaders (and Rook) was written while listening to “Lucky Ending”, the ending theme of Fruits Basket. The English lyrics (translated by otenkiame!) are:

“Change is important. I want to do it well,/ but I wanna cry. It's still bad. I wanna cry”

“The word "goodbye" has disappeared completely from this world/ All that remains is me fooling around next to you/A day you don't laugh won't come anymore”

“I've understood it since being here/ These feelings of wanting to protect you aren't a misunderstanding/ If we can call what connects us bonds,/ everything changes/ everybody changes/ Even if in a different world, it'll never be different/ everything changes/ everybody changes/ Don't change, ever/ Stay here, stay here”

I think it’s obvious why I chose to use this as the title of the series. It’s a story about change but it’s also a story about the things you don’t want to change... And I think it’s not wrong to want to hold onto things.

I also listened to the same playlist that I listened to while writing “wendy?” “hello peter pan”:

“Can’t help falling in love” cover by Annapantsu, “If you’re not the one” by David Beddingfield, “Who Knew” by P!nk and “All Too Well” by Taylor Swift.

For Lilia in particular, I was listening to three Beauty and the Beast songs on loop. “Evermore” by Josh Groban, “Days in the Sun” by the live action cast and, of course--”How does a moment last forever” by Celine Dion.

“How does a moment last forever?/ How can a story never die?/ It is love we must hold onto/ Never easy, but we try/ Sometimes our happiness is captured/ Somehow, our time and place stand still/ Love lives on inside our hearts and always will”

Also for Lilia, Tolerate It by Taylor Swift.

“You're so much older and wiser and I/ I wait by the door like I'm just a kid”

“I made you my temple, my mural, my sky/Now I'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life”

Malleus was definitely the first piece finished. Closely followed by Vil’s. I believe there was a gap inbetween them before I did the others? I wrote bits and pieces of Leona, Idia, Kalim and Azul’s. I think I finished Leona, Idia, Kalim then Riddle because I distinctly remember saving Azul for last.

One of the most important things for me, is that each story stands distinct of each other. So I gave myself a really hard time trying to figure out how each one uniquely belonged to each of the characters.

For the Prologue... I think because it’s set at the graduation of certain characters, I used that to my advantage and implied the stronger bonds between the Yuu!Reader and the entirety of the cast. Because a lot of time has passed and I feel like--regardless of what other people believe, bonds will be made and relationships will have strengthened enough for it to happen.

Riddle is honestly another really difficult character for me to write. I generally do love him and I enjoy his story, but something about him is difficult and I’m not sure why.

I think a part of me is also really miffed because from Heartslabyul-Savanaclaw, you could feel that Riddle really cared for Yuu on some level but then he just straight up disappears come Octavinelle chapter. I feel like there was potential to develop their relationship even more.

He WENT UP AND TIED YOUR RIBBON I REMEMBER I WENT DOKI DOKI OVER THAT.

I feel like because I’ve established that it’s a Yuu!Reader, it’s impossible for this story to not include both Ace and Deuce. So of course they featured in really big roles for this one, being responsible for telling Riddle the story.

I have to thank my friend, Mes, for bouncing ideas with me. They were the one who suggested what I could do with Riddle’s story by having ADeuce play such a big part!

I also tried my hardest to include Trey and Cater, and I’m pretty happy with their cameo. In a way, they definitely helped Riddle figure out his own feelings for you.

My favourite lines are: “I think you earned that much. I don’t believe anyone’s ever been in your situation before so—there’s no right or wrong about what you’re doing. It’s all about what you want to do.”

I wish someone would tell this to Yuu in general though. They’re the only one who has ever been in their situation (to our knowledge at least) and like... they’re definitely allowed to be even more selfish.

Leona is someone who I used to dislike a lot. I never hid that. It’s primarily because of how disappointed I am in the story of Savanaclaw probably. But like, I was always concerned about writing him properly because I thought that it was only right that I did right by him, because there would be people reading these stories who loved him. And I felt like I had to do right by that love.

I think... it’s wrong to believe that characters... villains... cannot fall in love or “won’t fall in love.” I think it’s wrong also to think that “people don’t change for love.”

In fact, people do change. You definitely shouldn’t change yourself to be loved, but... people change all the time to be their “better” selves. So whose to say that a good person, who you love, will not make you want to improve yourself? Isn’t that what we want when we meet people? To fall in love with someone who will ultimately make you better and never worse.

Or so that’s how I try to write the Twisted characters when they fall in love... With an understanding that “morally” the person they are falling for is “kind” and “good” and how a part of them might just want to be better just for that person. (Especially Leona and Azul). They don’t necessarily have to be nice to everyone, but if they can be better for one person... We stan healthy character growth.

But yeah, Leona is driven by understanding that he’s a very selfish person. But that he’s also very unfortunate and he doesn’t want tie you with someone who, he thinks, is actually worthless. He probably, deeply, thinks you deserve more.

Though his selfishness eventually wins out and well... Won’t you forgive him for it? :) For tying you down to this worthless second prince?

I think his own self-awareness does make him try harder. Not for everyone or everything... but for you. Just for you. I think that would be Leona’s love language--spending time with you, trying for you.

He’d appreciate if you didn’t call him out on it though, that would be very embarrassing.

Looking back, I’m surprised that it was the only version where none of the other boys from his dorm showed up lol. Which means Ruggie is the sole character who has yet to appear in the “lucky ending” series, huh.

My favourite lines from his story that still leaves me breathless and patting my past self in the back: ““I’m home—” you said—even if a part of you felt that home should have been two green eyes, a cocky smirk, and a warm patch of sunlight on the grassy ground.”

Like honestly, what was I on? Who was she?

Azul is, like Leona, someone who is so keenly aware of the things he’s lacking. In fact, he’s someone who thinks he’s lacking when he’s probably perfect in some aspects. He might act proud but a part of him--I think--thinks its not enough. It’s never enough. He can certainly do better still.

In that light, it’s why he thinks he’s undeserving of a partner. Especially one who is “kind” and “understanding.” While ultimately, Azul deserves people in his life who are that and “accepting” of him--I think he still thinks he doesn’t.

And thats why he lets go of the Yuu!Reader. It’s why he doesn’t “chase” after her like Leona did.

It’s because he’s selfish, because he wants her--that he forces himself to let go.

Azul needs someone who’ll tell him that he is worth something and that he’s definitely worth the effort. So please praise him a lot until he’s crying in happiness. I’m sure it’s the one thing he’s always wanted to hear from people around him.

Also my Poly!Octavinelle Agenda has never died and I am pleased Past!Ai got away with so much Poly!Octa hints in this story lol. But honestly, regardless of wht Octavinelle says... god, you can tell they genuinely care about each other.

I recently rewatched Octavinelle’s chapter and... by god, the amount of things I missed out on first watch. Jade’s concern when he realized Azul wanted to get rid of that photo... The fact Floyd was so willing to drop the fight to return to Azul too... Anyways, Poly!Octa Agenda for life.

Favourite lines: “Azul’s pathetic whimpers turned into guttural sobs. His fingers spread to cover his eyes—and his glasses slid off his face, down to his lap and then to the ground—at his actions. His whole body shook as he cried his heart out.”

It’s not as poetic as a lot of my other favourites, but for some reason these lines always get me when I reread them. There’s something so visceral about it.

Azul’s piece is probably the least visually stimulating out of all these stories? His was so emotionally driven compared to the others and I worried a lot about that.

I think I remember I was crying so badly as I was writing this.

Kalim is really hard for me because I feel like I struggle a lot with finding conflict in his character? He’s such a genuinely nice person, I find it hard to believe that the Yuu!Reader would feel alienated from him or something. So I brought in “environment” to get in the way.

My use of celestial imagery for Kalim is because of the Scarabia trailer! I really loved how it put Kalim as the sun and Jamil as the moon. I definitely will take advantage of that when I get around to writing for Jamil.

So because I wanted to use the sun, I chose to use the idea of comets for Kalim? I think I remember something about how meteors are drawn to the gravitation pull of the sun and can “escape” it or “be destroyed” by it. Haha, hot.

Jamil is someone who ultimately cares about Kalim too and I had fun writing his banter with the Yuu!Reader. I think I wanted to decribe the shadows licking his face reminscent to the marks from his Overblot but... I felt like doing that would give Jamil too much focus so I ultimately decided against it.

It would’ve been hot though.

Oh yes, one thing I wanted to talk about is Kalim’s rushed proposal. I remember people talking about it in the tags, comments... even in asks at that time. The reason he does it is because he’s someone who didn’t realize his feelings until you spelled out your own. It was a sort of: “Oh. Right. That is the word I’d use to describe my feelings.”

My favourite lines from his story is: “How does one bid goodbye to the sun?” and “No one ever willingly bids goodbye to the sun.They spend the rest of their lives trying to find the right way back to it.”

My god, who was this genius.

Vil is probably the most visually stunning out of all these stories. I feel like my stories go from super vivid imagery and setting to just complete emotional disasters lol. (Vil being the former and Azul’s being the latter... not that it’s bad, it actually suits the characters).

Oh man, I remember thinking that Vil is such a hard character to write because we don’t know what his motivation for perfection is. All we knows is that he wants to be the best but, why?

It’s like, for example, Idia. His motivations could be otaku-related. He doesn’t want to go to class because he’d rather go play or something. That sounds in character--but Vil was so hard because he wanted perfection.

But we already see him as such a perfect character, so what else did he need to be even more perfect? In that light, Chapter 5 did a really good job on presenting Vil’s motivations.

But honestly, I think I can comfortably say that the Vil I’ve written so far is pretty accurate? To his character. I’m really grateful I read his chat lines because his comment about intelligence really got me thinking about his possible motivations. It made it really easy to understand that Vil wasn’t like majority of the real world’s influencers.

One other thing that I was really happy about with his story is the use of the flower language. It’s something I hope I can use more because it’s so beautiful.

Oh! And the roses the Yuu!Reader talks about are double delight roses. They are specifically bred to have two colors--yellow in the center and pink on the outside. I thought it fitting that the Yuu!Reader breed special roses for Vil.

They can be called... err... Vil Roses?

My favourite lines from his story is: ““My happiness will not be dictated by others—no, Vil Schoenheit is a person who will grasp happiness with his own hands.” [...] “I’m giving you this button because I’ve already found happiness by your side.””

This line was actually inspired by Zelda C.W.’s MYth series. Specifically Hera’s story, Will.

Idia ...for him, I somehow had a very hard time imagining him trying to tell the reader to stay. Like that didn’t compute for me? I felt like his version was better approached in a more comedic light somehow.

I also felt that it would be cuter if the Yuu!Reader had already chosen to stay and Idia would need to hastily retrack his confession... Unfortunately, Yuu!Reader won’t let him.

Honestly looking back on it, I wonder how much of Chapter 6 is going to make me scream and want to rewrite Idia’s part?

My favourite lines from his story is: “He was never particularly good at lying—nor was he good at keeping secrets from you. You were a person he considered a dear friend—and he was always the type of person who ended up spilling everything to you. He liked being able to talk about the things he enjoyed—he liked that he had found someone who wanted to hear him out.”

A lot of my interpretation for Idia is closely linked to personal experience as an anime, manga and gaming fan. It was just a couple of years ago where people would actually be bullied for liking these things--but nowadays its become a norm. It’s... stunning actually but it makes me happy to know that maybe nobody will be judged for loving anime.

That being said, Idia’s longing to find someone he can talk to is something I really relate too--back then, it was so difficult to find someone to talk to about my interests... So I interpreted Idia as much the same. That what he enjoys about the Yuu!Reader is their ability to simply sit and listen to him talk.

Malleus... man, recently I’ve been starting to fall in love with him all over again. He was my first oshi ever... Anyways, moving on. You think I’ve talked enough about immortal x mortal but nope, we are not done. I love this theme in general, romantic or platonic.

I will never shut up about it you can’t make me.

Sebek having a good enough friendship with Yuu!Reader is such a delicious concept. Like mutual respect and Sebek understanding that Yuu!Reader gives Malleus a different type of companionship that Sebek, Silver or Lilia couldn’t...

And also, ultimately, Sebek and Yuu!Reader do love Malleus. In different ways, but I like the thought of Sebek respecting that and respecting the Yuu!Reader.

Me realizing just now that Silver joins Ruggie in the: “has never appeared in a lucky ending fic club.”... Sorry Silver, I swear soon. Once we get more content on you.

Celestial themes for Malleus are primarily, again, because he only ever seemed to meet you at night. And I thought it would be wonderful, if you were a bright spark to him.

Favourite lines are definitely: “Oh, bright light… I would prefer to live the rest of your life by your side… rather than spend centuries contemplating what it could have felt… to hold you in my arms.”

I am, always, going to be such a big sucker for the idea of immortals constantly remembering and loving mortals. Always holding them close in their memories, because in that way--their lovers have become immortal with them.

I also like to imagine that he eventually figures out a way to connect your worlds together so you can still talk to your friends and family from that world. He is one of the most powerful magicians around, I’m sure its possible.

Rook was honestly the most difficult piece for me to write because he’s so hard(?) for me to understand. He’s a mess of contradictions honestly and I... guess I’m excited to see what he’ll do come Chapter 6.

I actually rewrote his story so much. I got about 500 words with a different idea/plot in mind before deleting that completely and restarting from scratch.

I feel like Rook is someone who talks big and talks about love without actually knowing what it truly might feel like. He’s someone who doesn’t understand it and ends up mistaking it for his fascination.

Aside from me enjoying inserting other characters from the same dorm as much as possible, I felt that Vil was the perfect person to snap some sense into Rook.

Epel’s appearance there is basically to reflect how much I really hope the first year kids get really close to one another.

Rook is also someone who I think, doesn’t try to explain himself too much. He’s someone who I think talks a lot, but if people don’t understand him then he doesn’t need to be understood? That’s my impression. Lol, when “lucky ending” became a character study.

I also really loved the idea that Rook was fine with people running from him--to him that makes it all the more thrilling. But then you start running away from him and that just ends up making dread pool in his stomach.

My favourite lines from his story: “‘When something ends, it must be sad. So, tell me then, how an ending could be so beautiful?’ [...] .‘But there was one ending that was beautiful, non?’ [...] ‘That’s right. ‘They lived happily ever after’—are those not the words that define a beautiful ending?’”

I used the dusk metaphor for Rook. My idea is that he starts seeing dusk as an ending and how he can’t fathom how any “ending” is beautiful. When a story ends, it’s not beautiful to him, humu. But when that ending is the happily ever after then... That makes all the difference.

Lilia was actually easier than Rook’s but also fairly difficult. I had written the middle of Lilia’s piece while stumped on Rook’s actually. Lilia’s was probably easier because I love the idea of immortals and mortals.

I don’t really like the idea of mortals becoming immortals. Like, yes, it’s certainly sweet and spending eternity with a one true love is definitely the best possible ending but... I think there’s so much weight in an immortal choosing to love a mortal while knowing that they will ultimately lose them.

The biggest theme for Lilia is definitely time.

Thinking about it now... There’s been a lot of things in real life that’s just... Made me think about how we have less time than we actually think we have. And I think I ended up channeling that through Lilia... Though I feel like it is ultimately things Lilia would think about though.

The most important imagery would probably be the stars.

I honestly wanted to avoid it because I used celestial imagery for both Kalim and Malleus but the words just flowed out in a way that I felt that I couldn’t replace. So I went with it.

Lilia is no stranger to loneliness. One of the reasons he feels less alone is because he has family now and he doesn’t want to rob you of that. Family is so important to him because they are people who are meant to be with you--they are people who will make you less lonely--or so thats how I think? he thinks.

My favourite lines from his story: “He would relish in the way—You made the world pause. You made a moment extend into an eternity. You made an immortal crave just a little more time.”

I’m so immensely proud of this one? I don’t really have much else to say. There’s something so raw about it that I love. Also the part where it continues on to say that “Because there is never enough time.”

Me realizing my extra notes is just half me simping over these characters, half sharing headcanons, have actually giving good advice? perspective?, half song lyrics, half character study/analysis?

“lucky ending” is about change. Whether we want them to happen or not it’s... the human condition to change. For better or worse, we change--day by day. I think we all operate under a small panic about how everyday things are changing...

But “lucky ending” is also about the things that don’t change. Won’t change. Will never change. The things worth holding onto, the thing worth fighting for... or so I’d like to think.

#aimuses #ainotes #ai lucky series #twst #twisted wonderland #its 6 AM HEEHOOO

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lilothrowbacks · 3 years

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Louis Tomlinson went on a Twitter reply stream on Monday (if you saw any of The Honey POP fam trying to get noticed… no you didn’t bestie), and amongst talk of his wisdom teeth, napping, and his nan, his answer to one question, in particular, left our brains melting. HE HASN’T WRITTEN HIS BEST SONG YET! Louis Tomlinson’s songwriting is supreme, but watch this space, the best is yet to come…

Yes, according to our Donny King, when asked what the best song he has written in his lifetime is, Louis answered “Haven’t written it yet”. Considering the quality of music Louis has already put out to brighten our world, plus the other songs that never made it to Walls (he wrote over 100 songs!), we’re not sure how we’ll survive when he does write it!

Contenders For The Title

Louis may not think he has written his best song yet, but we’re pretty sure there are some strong contenders for the title! Here is our ranking of the 6 best songs Louis Tomlinson has ever written! We had to stop ourselves from doing 28… what can we say? We’re simps.

6. ‘Don’t Let It Break Your Heart’

Louis shared that this is one of the songs he is really proud of, for its lyrics and music. During his exclusive chat with LA On Air for 96.5 TDY last year, Lou said while chatting about ‘DLIBYH’: “… across the whole song, that’s something I’m proud of musically in particular. The lyrics are really strong, I mean, that’s always me thing anyway, but I’m really happy with the music…” You’re right Louis, the lyrics really are your thing. Talking about the inspiration for the song, Lou explained “It’s about trying to find hope wherever you can”, and for so many of us, we found hope in that song, and of course, just in Louis. Life really does get hard and get messed up, but for many of us Louie’s, this song makes us feel stronger.

It is beautiful, hopeful, and honest lyricism, and that’s why ‘DLIBYH’ has to be in THP HQ’s list of Louis’ best songwriting!

5. ‘Two Of Us’

I mean, it’s pretty obvious. Do we even need to explain this one? ‘Two Of Us’ is one of the most moving, raw, and emotional songs we have ever heard. In honor and loving memory of Louis’ beautiful Mum Jay, this song and its lyrics feel like seeing into Louis’ heart, and Louis’ ability to do that through music, is unprecedented in our opinion. It has such vulnerable strength and honesty, and Lou’s songwriting here, allowed him to vocalize his pain, but also, it allowed us as fans to mourn in our own way too, and this is a truly special gift that Louis gave to the world. He promised her he’d do this, so all of this is all for Jay; and as fans, we will never forget that. Sleep tight Johannah.

Of course, we had to put ‘Two Of Us’ on our list of times that Louis Tomlinson has absolutely floored us with his songwriting talent.

4. ‘Home’

We can’t even verbalise to you, how much we struggled to pick which One Direction song to include here… he wrote so many! We went back and forth on 9 different songs, because as Louis Tomlinson said on Twitter in 2018, “if it’s by One Direction and it’s a banger I probably wrote on it”. In the end, our hearts belong to ‘Home’, because, putting it bluntly, it is the epitome of how we feel about 1D – they made it feel like home. ‘Home’ is a firm fan favorite because it connected with so many of us in so many ways. That was evident when the song won a Teen Choice Award in 2016, despite never being a single! Fans further celebrated the song, through a month-long fan project in 2016, which led to the song being added to 1D’s official Spotify playlist a month later!

Any song that can connect with us to that level, and make us feel so deeply that we still cry about it after 5+ years, absolutely demands a spot on our list of the best songs Louis has written.

3. ‘Only The Brave’

Say it with us: “It should have been longer!” The closing track of Louis’ debut album, is in our opinion, an absolute lyrical masterpiece. “It’s a church of burnt romances and I’m too far gone to pray”…. Excuse me? Too many feelings. Nobody touch us. What an exquisite visual? Louis Tomlinson doesn’t just write songs, he is a storyteller. We will never understand how Louis managed to pack so much emotion, truth, and vulnerability, into a song of only 1 minute and 44 seconds; but we’ll also never stop thanking him for it. ‘Only The Brave’ has made such a giant footprint in this fandom, with a special mention going to so many LGBTQIA+ Louie’s (this writer included), for the comfort so many of us have found in this song. So many fans feel seen through this song regardless of the meaning or intention, because the honesty of an incredible song, is that people can take what they need from it. That, in our opinion, is Louis’ specialty, and it’s just really bloody important to us!

‘Only the Brave’ felt like a gift to fans, and its lyrics paint such vivid colors and visuals for so many fans. Of course, it’s on our list!

2. ‘Copy of a Copy of a Copy’

‘COACOAC’ is special. Yes, it’s the newest song we’ve heard, but we think it’s one of the best too! Once again, this song paints a picture so beautifully. In fact, we think if we gave Louie’s a canvas and a paintbrush, we could all draw what ‘COACOAC’ looks like! Debuted during Louis’ live stream concert in December 2020 (which we still haven’t recovered from by the way), this song casts shadows and shines light. “I can hear you, howling ’til your lungs hurt, so let this be your comfort, you’re not the only one.” It’s dark, yet hopeful, and experienced yet vulnerable. We think it’s one of the most thought-provoking songs Louis has shared with us, and in seconds, it became a fan favorite. ‘COACOAC’ is a testament to Louis’ insightful songwriting, and stylistically, its alternative vibe makes us weak with anticipation for the future of Louis’ journey with song-writing. We at THP HQ, can’t wait to scream it with you all at a Louis concert, once life makes sense again.

‘COACOAC’ has cemented its place as one of Louis Tomlinson’s best songwriting masterpieces; and has launched itself to number 2 on our list!

1. ‘Defenceless’

Oh, ‘Defenceless’, what can we say about you? You’re our number one. There is one lyric in particular, that just cannot be competed with, and which has confirmed ‘Defenceless’ as our pick for the best song Louis has ever written. “We’re sleeping on our problems like we’ll solve them in our dreams. Wake up early morning and they’re still under the sheets”. Like, seriously? Come on, that isn’t just songwriting, that is poetry, it’s art. We dare to say, it may be one of the best lyrics in music. Ever. The brainpower of this man! ‘Defenceless’ stole the hearts and minds of Louie’s across the world, as it should. The ‘Defenceless’ project, which started online in February 2021, confirmed the magnitude of this song. It brought fans together from across the globe (much like the ‘No Control’ Project back in 2015). We saw #LouiesOnOmegle spread the word of this monumental song to strangers, and Louie’s storm global radio stations to play the track. Not only is ‘Defenceless’ lyrically, melodically, and sonically world-class, but the way it united fans; was magnificent.

This song affirms Louis Tomlinson, as one of the best songwriters of a generation, and it’s going smack-bang at the top of our list, of the best songs Louis has ever written.

25.3.2021

#louis tomlinson #the honey pop #articles #louis update #250321

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lambden · 3 years

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Here’s some belated Geraskier fic that I finally get to post, as last week’s flash fic challenge has wrapped up! This was originally published anonymously; kudos to those of you who guessed that I was the author. Head to the collection to see the picture prompt that inspired this, as well as view the other works. I've been having a great time participating in fandom events like this; I promise there's more on the way!!! (Read on AO3)

Up To Date

prompt: "You were so hot that when you asked if I was the blind date you were looking for, I lied and said yes. But then your actual date comes up to introduce themselves and I'm so embarrassed."

G, 2.3K words, modern AU, Geralt/Jaskier

It shouldn’t be this difficult to find inspiration. He never used to struggle like this in high school, finding his muse in everyone and everything. Even his mundane trip on the city bus to and from school would give Jaskier hundreds of ideas, for poems too personal to publish or lyrics too deep for his band to use. Back then he had thought he lacked discipline and experience, so the clear choice had been to take his interest in poetry one step further and go to university.

The problem, as he’s now discovering halfway through his second year, is that he maybe hates university. He loves it, of course; he loves the praise from his professors and peers, he loves learning about the history of literature and art. He even loves the academic rivalries that wax and wane every term, and the competitions that ignite a mean streak in him he didn’t know he had.

But his assignments are of worse quality than anything he’s ever written before, and try as he might, they aren’t getting any better. Putting words on the page just to meet a count is impossible for a poet, not when the space and thoughts and images are all supposed to be cohesive. Poems used to flow from him so freely he hadn’t been able to keep track and now his well of motivation has just about run dry.

That’s what led him here, for the third time this week. His creative dysfunction has forced him into the day-to-day habits of an elderly man who spends his days reading in public gardens. It hasn’t helped so far, but maybe this third time will be the charm. Jaskier finds his favorite place: right by the koi pond, next to a strange art installation with ivy crawling along it. He sits at the base of the giant question mark, dropping his backpack onto the bench beside him.

“This better fucking work,” mutters Jaskier to himself and the koi, opening today’s book to a random poem. He refuses to let his mind wander at first, gluing his eyes to the page and reading with intense intent. The first poem he sees is about love.

Groaning, Jaskier flips the page. The next poem is also about love.

The third poem is about war, and Jaskier thinks that might be alright, until he realizes what this long-dead poet is trying to tell him, which is that war is also about love. Because it is, of course, but also of course it is. Jaskier scowls deeply and flips through the book to a random page, hoping to find something to spark inspiration that won’t just make him feel hopeless and single and hopelessly single.

Before Jaskier can get through the title, someone speaks to him, startling him so badly he jumps. “Are you Yennefer’s friend?”

Jaskier scrambles to catch the book by its cover and nearly drops it. He hadn’t even heard anyone approach. “Sorry?”

The stranger audibly sighs, as if Jaskier has inconvenienced him terribly. With all the force of someone announcing their presence at their own death row, he grits out, “I’m here for a blind date she set up. With you.” Jaskier looks up at the man and sees him wearing a blank expression, pointing at the question mark in front of the bench. “By the thing.”

“Oh,” Jaskier says, still looking at the man. It takes a second for the words to sink in because the stranger is perhaps the most handsome person Jaskier has ever seen. He could write a thousand poems and still fail to capture his beauty. He has golden eyes, for one, and a sharply chiseled face. Even grimacing like this, his jaw is set in the loveliest way, and his stern brow is framed by platinum white hair, half-tied up. He’s wearing a fairly gloomy outfit for a blind date, but maybe he told whoever Yennefer is that he would be dressed in black. Regardless, he’s making it work.

The gorgeous stranger is still waiting for an answer, scowl worsening as Jaskier tries to make his decision about how the fuck to handle this. Really, there’s no decision at all— he just impulsively takes the leap. All his best ideas come when he’s stumbling forward blind anyway. “Yes,” he finally says, jumping to his feet. “Yes, um, I’m sorry, you caught me off-guard. I’m Jaskier.”

“Geralt.” They’re of a similar height, but Geralt is so much wider. Jaskier wants to climb him like ivy on a question mark. “I’m sorry I interrupted.”

“It’s fine! I got here a while ago. You know, can’t be too early!” Jaskier has never been early for anything in his life. He sits down again and shoves his books into his bag as quickly as he can. Geralt shifts his weight back and forth between his feet before awkwardly sitting on the bench next to Jaskier, looking out at the garden. “I’ve never done this kind of thing before,” he admits, which is true. His usual lies and schemes are much less chaotic.

Geralt doesn’t reply to that, leaving Jaskier to privately wonder about his dating life. He stares at the plants, giving the impression that he might be hideously nervous. Jaskier has no idea why someone like Geralt would be nervous about anything but it’s an awkward situation, to say the least. Right as Jaskier’s about to suggest they get out of here before Geralt’s real date shows up, the man asks, “What were you reading?”

“I was studying, sort of,” Jaskier says. “I’m a student.” Then abruptly he wonders how much Geralt knows about who he’s supposed to be, and he swallows, pulse racing.

Glancing over, Geralt’s yellow eyes meet his. There’s no obvious doubt there, just a curiosity. “What’s your major?”

“Poetry,” Jaskier grins as their conversation starts to pick up something resembling a rhythm. “What about you, are you in school?”

“No,” says Geralt, cutting his dreams of a normal date conversation short. “Are you any good? At writing poetry?”

What a weirdo. Jaskier’s heart thrums. “I’d like to think so!” This, at least, is something he knows how to talk about. Except, of course, it isn’t really the truth. “Well… recently, I’ve been in a bit of a creative rut. Just waiting for the right burst of inspiration to come along.” Perhaps this blind date that he’s stolen will suffice, but he doesn’t say that. “This place is great for that, actually. I mean, it hasn’t worked yet, but I’m sure any day those fish will sing for me.”

Geralt blinks. Jaskier feels a bead of sweat run down the back of his neck. He tries a different tactic, crossing his ankles and asking politely, “Are you a reader? What kind of things do you enjoy?”

“Nonfiction,” Geralt answers, slightly stilted. His gaze drifts over to the plants once more. “Not biographies, more like… encyclopedias and field journals. I like field journals.”

“Alright,” Jaskier says, shrinking into himself. This is going terribly. “I’ll have to go bribe some scientists for their field journals, then.” The corner of Geralt’s lip twitches, and Jaskier’s stomach flips. Gorgeous and weird and maybe, although he’s trying his best to hide it behind seven layers of nerves, maybe a little amused by Jaskier. Jaskier is going to fuck him right here in the garden. “Do you take journals of your own for work?”

A rather roundabout way of asking ‘what the fuck is it that you do’ but somehow, it lands. “I’m a… researcher,” Geralt mumbles. How very vague. “But I don’t publish my findings very often.”

Jaskier raises an eyebrow. “Do you work… for a company?”

“No.”

“Right. So you’re just keeping all your findings to yourself for no good reason at all.”

“No.”

“Then it sounds like you’re a pretty terrible researcher, actually.”

Geralt’s eyes flash as he turns to glare at Jaskier. “What?”

“Well, if you don’t share what you’ve found with anyone—”

“My… colleagues—”

“Aha! So you have colleagues!” Jaskier pokes Geralt’s side. “You aren’t just holed up in some depressing storage unit with months and months of research just for you.”

Once more, Geralt half-smirks. Not even half— more like a one-fifth smirk. “Years,” he admits.

“Years…” Jaskier tilts his head to the side thoughtfully. “Why do I have the feeling that you’re perhaps a significant number of years older than me?”

“I had the same thought when I saw you sitting here,” Geralt mumbles.

Jaskier snorts. “Seems like something Yennefer should have warned us about, perhaps. I would ask you directly how old you are, but I’m fairly certain that the only response I will get is a very gruff no.”

“No,” says Geralt, nearly smiling.

Making a show of pouting, Jaskier folds his arms over his chest. “Is that your favorite word?”

“No.” Geralt breaks into laughter as he repeats himself, and his whole face lights up with it. Jaskier laughs too, delighted by how joyous Geralt looks. He’s even more beautiful when he’s happy like this, and Jaskier wants very badly for this not to be their last date. “If I tell you my favorite word, you’re bound to judge me for it, as a poet.”

“As a poet, I swear not to mock you,” Jaskier raises his hand to cover his heart, barely restraining himself from grinning.

But before Geralt can share whatever it is, someone else approaches their bench. A second stranger— a woman about his height with short brown hair, wearing a pretty blouse. Jaskier notices her much more quickly than he’d noticed Geralt, and he makes the connection instantly. This can’t possibly end well.

“Oh, Yen wasn’t kidding,” says the stranger, eyeing Geralt. “You are very distinctive!”

Geralt stares back at her, slack-jawed for a moment. “What?”

“I’m Renfri,” Geralt’s date introduces herself. Jaskier wishes the earth would open up and swallow him whole, especially when she glances over at him. Her gaze slides back to Geralt, as does Jaskier’s, and yeah, he is very fucking distinctive with that white hair and those yellow eyes. Damn. “My friend Yennefer set us up for a blind date…?”

As Jaskier contemplates throwing himself into the koi pond, Geralt twists to stare at him. Jaskier can only imagine how mortified he must look right now; his face burns as both Renfri and Geralt look his way. Perhaps Renfri will figure it out before Geralt says anything; she looks like a smart woman.

But Geralt just gets up, dusting himself off and shaking his head. “No,” he tells Renfri, which would almost be funny if it weren’t the weirdest thing Jaskier has ever seen anyone do. Then Geralt leaves, turning to walk away from both of them, leaving Jaskier and Renfri alone together in the garden. Renfri frowns, watching him go with obvious increasing confusion. Jaskier also jumps to his feet, equally confused but determined not to lose sight of Geralt.

He chases the man— and it does feel like a chase, Geralt must be fucking speed-walking away— and finally tracks him down well outside the garden. Geralt is thundering down a set of stairs leading to a parking lot and he doesn’t stop at the sound of Jaskier careening towards him. Only when Jaskier desperately calls his name does he finally stop, slowing until he reaches the bottom landing and then standing there, still.

“I’m sorry,” Jaskier calls down the stairs, breathless. He begins to descend them but Geralt doesn’t turn around. “Fuck, you’re fast! Shit. I’m sorry, Geralt.”

Without looking his way, Geralt complains, so quietly that Jaskier nearly misses it, “Yennefer is going to kill me.”

“I would have fucked off,” Jaskier says quickly, hurrying down the rest of the steps until he gets to the bottom. Geralt still doesn’t look at him so Jaskier slides none-too-gracefully into his space, demanding his attention. He’s hardly red in the face or anything, but he looks embarrassed. Jaskier crumbles. “I’m sorry. I— seriously, I don’t care, I would have fucked off. I should’ve left, I should’ve— You should go back there, she’s beautiful!”

Geralt’s nostrils flare but he doesn’t look away. “Why did you lie,” he demands, flat.

“Well,” Jaskier deflates. “Um. You’re beautiful.”

“Hmm.”

“I really am sorry,” he offers.

Geralt, still watching him closely, says, “You don’t sound sorry.”

“What do you want me to do?” Jaskier throws his hands in the air, breaking away from Geralt’s stare— in the greenhouse, surrounded by bright lights and open, manmade nature, it had been easy to sit under the weight of Geralt’s eyes on him. Down here, at the end of a staircase and the entrance to a dark garage, chest still heaving, it feels too intimate. He puts some distance between them, sighing. “You want me to go back there and explain the whole situation to poor Renfri?”

When Jaskier finally turns around again, Geralt’s gaze hasn’t left him. “I want you to come have dinner with me instead,” he says, slowly but purposefully.

“Oh,” breathes Jaskier. “That’s— well, if you want that.”

“I already made a reservation for two. My name’s on the list.” Geralt is fidgeting with the end of his sleeve at first but when he approaches Jaskier he drops it, striding forward without hesitating. “Table for Geralt and one young brunet friend of Yennefer’s.”

Jaskier chokes on his own surprised laugh. “I don’t actually know Yennefer,” he needlessly explains.

“She’s going to hate you,” says Geralt, half-smirking, and then he adds, “Well, she’ll hate both of us now.”

They get to the restaurant twenty minutes late, Geralt’s hair mussed up and lips a bitten red and Jaskier wearing his backpack and a shit-eating grin. The host sees them and immediately tells them their table has been cancelled, and they end up getting terrible two-dollar slices from a hole-in-the-wall pizza place. They eat on the way back to Geralt’s car and then he drives Jaskier back to campus, kissing him soundly in the door to his apartment until Priscilla comes home and yells at Jaskier to get a room. As they squabble Geralt apologizes, polite and nervous, and kisses Jaskier’s cheek and tells him it was nice to meet him.

Jaskier goes inside and spends the next thirteen hours writing the best poetry he will ever write.

#my writing #geraskier fic #geraskier #flash fic challenge #events

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yuuri-nsane · 3 years

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do you ever think about YOI's main ending song.... like from whose perspective it is, or like, the way it links into the op..... i just can't stop thinking about "you're so beautiful tonight / you had me spellbound / you could've stopped an hourglass / take my breath away" being juxtaposed with the slow settle on viktor's insta post at a festival... i can't figure out if it's like the op where it's divided between yuuri and viktor in verses? would love your thoughts if you have any!!

oh my god i actually completely overlooked that! i've never actually searched up the lyrics for you only live once, so i haven't really looked into it! but having brought it up now and doing some cool overanalysing- i thought it was super interesting...

you're so beautiful tonight / you had me spellbound / you could've stopped an hourglass / take my breath away

personally, i see these lyrics as being interchangeable between yuuri and viktor. the whole "wow" factor of the song - it's a possible reference to the way yuuri admired viktor as a kid, and continued to do so as an adult,,, someone who truly inspired him

whereas it could also reference what happened at sochi from viktors pov

^i do strongly believe it's most likely sochi, because although the lyrics portray a general sense of awe, which applies to yuuri for viktor and vice versa, the word "tonight" really resonates with me. to me, it emphasises the moment,, the fact that it [sochi] happened on the one (o n e) night - and it heavily affected viktor afterwards.

in fact. the whole song, evokes a sense of "you stood out. you were different. you inspired me". and if that doesn't scream viktor nikiforov flying halfway across the globe to coach someone who drunkenly danced with him for a single night, after seeing the same person skate one of his routines, i don't know what will.

i think though, that there are undertones referring to the both of them in the entirety of the song. like i said before, it's definitely interchangeable. the way that viktor feels for yuuri - it's mutual. do i need to pull up a pic of yuuri's viktor-poster-covered room

looking back, the op stressed the feeling of building yourself back up after times of hardships; achieving your dreams, whilst simultaneously learning to believe in yourself. with the way that the first verse of the op was from yuuri's single perspective and the second part after that was viktors, i think the ending implies the same thing, but instead, it's watching someone else stand up after being knocked down, and being motivated, driven, to do the same.

"I was born to shine"/ your struggles told me, all the while shining.

i won't shun the wounds i got trying to shine / you taught me that / all the while shining

it's no secret that viktor was extremely unhappy post series. the theories of him being depressed, and wanting to retire? viktor stopped being so passionate about the ice. he wasn't able to surprise people anymore. he stopped loving it. he got bored, and lonely and sad.

but then he meets yuuri. beautiful, lovely yuuri, who made him feel more alive than he's ever felt in years. yuuri is what keeps him going, inspires him - even if it's not to skate or stay on the ice, it's yuuri who makes viktor not want to give up. it's yuuri that makes him feel passionate. it's no longer the ice.

viktor knows that yuuri has a hard time believing in himself. that yuuri is scared of failure and disappointment.

he knows first hand the struggles that yuuri deals with almost 24/7, yet how persistent and unwavering his will is.

he also knows that yuuri has the potential to be the best, to maybe be better than himself. that leaked video of yuuri skating viktors routine to a point shows this. yuuri is talented. but why hasn't he ever seen this? competed against yuuri? yuuri could give him a run for his money - with the way he imitated the skate of the most decorated skater in the century. his skate. he wants to get yuuri to that point of reaching that damned potential. he wants to make it work, and is willing to put the effort in, for yuuri and for himself.

knowing yuuri - so beautiful and hard-working, viktor is in awe.

when you're sad and hard time / we believe in you / oh i'm just dreaming of the day / thunderous applause / roar so loudly that all our hard work will pay off! / "you were born to shine" / you taught me that / all the while shining

the yoi series focuses on yuuri transforming from a "dozen a dime" skater to one that got second place, silver, in the grand prix. yuuri had a hard time believing in himself, believing he could really skate - until viktor came into his life. viktor who popped up from russia, in his family's onsen completely naked. we don't know about sochi until episode 10. 10. and still, what we only know is from their cut short convo about it, the credits and heavy speculation. yuuri has no recollection of it. none of it comes from his pov. but it is essential to the plot. it's the entire catalyst. it makes sense to implicate it, to reflect it in some part of the show.

and the perfect place to do that? the ending.* the focus shifts from yuuri's journey and viktors anchoring presence, to the other way around. the way we delve deeper into it, and find that not everything is so one-sided.

yoi is a love story. and every love story, no matter how small or grand, has two or more interests. two, or more, povs. ep 10 (*which is near the end of the first season), the op and the ending demonstrates this, albeit subtly.

also, the general message of the op is to make a mark. to make history. the ending seems to highlight that, except with a more exaggerated stance. "you only live once." you have one chance, just one, to do this. viktors got it all. fame, money, success. he's done it already - he's made history. he has a title and people know him. but what about love? what about true happiness? has he found them yet? the emotional stability? i think the song in a way, validates viktors constant attempt to attain this - his goal isn't to make history anymore. he's achieved this. his goal is... well - it's something, or someone, else entirely. he was inspired and wants to keep trying.

with that, the part you mentioned about the credits slowing down on a post of viktor at a festival (caption: Nakasu in Japan! Everything is really great and delicious! #Nakasu #Japan #ramen) is another significant piece to the puzzle!

i think the screencap/post itself was sort of foreshadowing the obvious part that alchohol and intoxication plays in viktor and yuuri relationship (or at least it's being the whole catalyst of it),,

but also, it might be another important part of the story we'll see soon. i don't know whether viktors taken the photo himself (which is most likely), or he's pulling someone along who is taking the photo themselves. even then, we really don't know much about it apart from that viktors drunk (he has a glass in hand, is unkempt, blushing, seems carefree). We also know that it's in nakasu (which is a real place in japan) because of the caption. (it's a night district with loads of clubs, karaoke parlors, arcades etc.)

with that, there isn't a lot i can think to propose, other than the foreshadowing theory and that we might get front row seats to drunk viktor having Fun in later seasons.... (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵) and maybe some drunk bonding time with yuuri pt2

ヾ(＠⌒ー⌒＠)ノ

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doiefy · 3 years

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next time you see me, I may be smiling // lee jeno

genre: fluff, angst pairing: jeno x gn. reader word count: 1.2k warnings: the usual profanity, mentions of smoking and alcohol

Very loosely inspired by the Netflix series Money Heist, but contains no spoilers (I’m pretty sure...? lmfao). Was thinking about naming people after cities like they did in the series but it seemed a little bit overboard? Just the thought of referring to Johnny as “Chicago” or smth made me choke.

Title refers to the lyrics of an English version of Bella Ciao, and it just so happened to fit what I was going for :D

Jeno took a long drag from his cigarette, sighing in contentment as a puff of white smoke spilled into the night air. You plucked the cigarette from his fingers, brought it up to your own lips, inhaled until a pleasant sting hit the back of your throat. It engulfed your senses in a certain familiarity and comfort—it silenced the thoughts circulating your head, the demons that’d chased you out of sleep and forced you to sneak up onto the roof where you could breathe again.

It wasn’t like you weren’t allowed to be up here; though sneaking around like this, staying up when you had such a long day ahead of you… Johnny would likely scold you for it. But at nearly five in the morning, he wasn’t awake to do so, and you doubted anyone else was either. The house was quiet, perfectly still except for the boy sitting next to you. Even he was motionless, his eyes half-closed as he tangled his fingers with yours. He turned his head ever so slightly, just enough for his eyes to find yours in the darkness.

His lips curved up into the faintest smile. You missed his smile. Not the ghostly, half-amused smirks he sent you these days—but the toothy grins, the eye smiles, the wholehearted laughs he’d let out whenever you said something even decently funny. That was years ago, when the two of you were just idiot teens on the run, years before he’d grown into himself. Things were different now.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?” He asked in a quiet whisper. He reached over to tuck a stray piece of your hair back in place, the cigarette still balanced between two of his fingers.

“Nothing,” you murmured. “Just… worried.” You paused, looking out at the waterfront as you did so habitually on these kinds of nights. “What do you think about? Before a heist?”

Jeno was quiet for a few moments. When you turned back to him, you found him staring thoughtfully at a fixed point in front of him, unmoving, silent. You’d asked the others the same question in the last week, and they’d all answered jokingly, dismissively, as if it was a silly inquiry to be brushed aside. For Jaemin, it was filling a pool up with cash and swimming through it. For Renjun, it was showering the city with money like Robin Hood and for Doyoung, it was watching the havoc he’d wreaked repotred on every TV channel. Such grand, villainous gestures blurted out without much thought so you wouldn’t see that they were just as terrified as you were.

Not a single person had said anything about being caught. Not a single person had said a single thing about everything that could go horribly wrong.

“I guess I don’t,” Jeno finally said with a simple shrug.

“You what?”

“I don’t think about anything,” he elaborated hastily, as if the answer were obvious. Perhaps it did make a bit of sense, why he’d paused for so long to search for an answer. He had none.

“Nothing?” You questioned, raising a brow curiously. “Not even when it’s all we ever talk about? All the planning and practicing and shit every single day?”

He chuckled. It was maybe the closest you would ever get to hearing his laughter again, the closest you would ever get to seeing him happy again. “I know the plan, I know the consequences and I know how this will probably end. I can’t really bring myself to overthink it. It kinda fucks you in the head.”

“No crazy fantasies about what you’ll do with the money?” You asked.

“I’m not like Donghyuck,” He scoffed. A moment’s pause, and then he turned back to you, eyes speckled with the stars in the night sky behind you. “And whatever I decide to do when it’s all over… it’ll be simple.”

He leaned in, close enough for you to smell the subtle citrus notes of his cologne and the cheap wine you’d drank earlier. His lips hovered above yours behind a thin veil of smoke. “Run away with you, maybe,” he mused, so quietly you could barely hear him. “It’ll be like old times…”

“Just the two of us,” you finished for him as his lips brushed against yours. It was slow, soft, unlike the way he sometimes kissed you breathless when the others weren’t watching.

“Donghyuck will kill us if he finds out, you know,” you whispered when he finally pulled away. “When things go wrong and Johnny isn’t there to stop him. He’ll do it.”

“Then make sure he doesn’t find out,” Jeno gave you a sly grin, pecking you on the lips again. “When this is all over, we’ll go. Take only what we need, enough to start new... Find a quiet place to settle down. Whatever you want.”

You let your fingers trail over the jagged scar on his cheek—a permanent reminder of how you’d been thrown into this life. How Johnny had found the two of you in a dark alley some three years ago: two kids bleeding out on the pavement, almost unconscious, washed up and probably not even worth saving. Jeno was never the same after that night. And for whatever reason, you’d always been too scared to talk about it. Too scared to do anything else but watch his smiles fade, his encouraging words cease, the clear crystal encasing him cloud up with cigarette smoke.

“You trust me, right?” He asked after a few moments, when the words had died in the back of your throat and you were silent.

“Stupid question, Jeno,” you gave him a look, stifling a burst of laughter when you saw the wounded expression he wore.

“Not exactly the answer I was looking for.”

So you grabbed him, pulling him in for a more heated kiss to prove your point. He let out a muffled sound of surprise, arms instinctively coming around your waist to pull you a bit closer, fingers running through your hair. “Of course I do,” you murmured against him, but you couldn’t quite hear yourself over the pounding of your heart and the rush of blood in your ears. “You know I do. I always will.”

“Then trust me on this one too.”

When you nodded, his face lit up in a way that you hadn’t seen in some time. His eyes crinkled slightly, his lips pulling back in a small smile that seemed just a bit more genuine, a bit more… like him. Like the boy you had run away with all those years ago and like the boy you would run away with again in a week’s time, if you made it out of the heist alive. And with him by your side, you were determined to do so.

As you waited for the sun to come up and the rest of the house to stir from sleep, the two of you existed in a break in time. A void in space, one the rest of the world was completely oblivious to. It was just you and him.

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spade-riddles · 3 years

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Submission: Kaylor timeline 2019-2020

This is a atempt of maping the happenings surrounding kaylor in the last 3 years. Please keep in mind that i might forget some things, mostly from 2019 since my memory is actually horrible. I’ll try to include the most important things mainly so let me know if i missed something big. Also, feel free to add some kaylor nods, easter eggs on the girls’ social media, general stuff and correct me i fim wrong on dates or places. Oh quick disclaimer: most of this is Taylor focused because the last time i went on karlies instagram to look for the nashville selfie i actually wanted to puke or bury my face into a hole for the rest of eternety (ok, both) after seeing the jerk photos so if you have any important stuff please add it. Thank u!!!

Lover Era

- ME! MV release on lesbian visibility day (april 26th)

- City of Lover (funny enough, karlie was there in march 😉)

- taylor’s pride post “lets show our pride...” (taylors ig june 1st)

- Promo for the MV with karlie’s hand on taylors ig 16 june post

- sc**ter *audible puke sound* buys taylors masters (june 30th)

- You Need To Calm Down MV (july 17th)

- Lover Title Track released 13 days after karlie’s bday (august 16th)

- Lover mv release which Taylor captioned on her ig post with YAIL lyrics.

- Lover Album Release (august 23rd)

- Miss Americana release (jan 31 2020) “gay pride... everything that makes me me” etc

- The Man MV release (feb 27th)

Here’s some posts with lover era easter eggs:

Link 1

Link 2

some inch resting posts:

eye theory ?!

gold rush 😉

paris captions:

Link 1

Link 2

(probably not that much of a proof much more of a koincidence since au revoir is a pretty common frase but whatever)

This masterpiece here during NYFW in 2019:

note: I think its pretty safe to assume that up until this point its obvious kaylor is still together. Theres exactly no reason why Taylor and Karlie would be referencing kaylor stuff and each other at this point if they weren’t together.

folklore & evermore Era (oh the start of a daydream and a nightmare)

- Not a lot going on at the moment post April 27, 2020

- Karlies very interesting posts:

Dancing in a Cardigan July 10th, 2020

Happy Place July 23rd, 2020

- Tamagochi June 25, 2020 and buns May 14, 2020

- folklore announcement (july 23rd)

Note: up until this point its also pretty much a concensus that they’re still together. Since Karlie hinted the folklore aesthetic and cardigan on her ig post, and Taylor changed the cardigan lyrics to “knew you’d come back to me” and wrote “the lakes” and obviously there is “peace”. From this point on, especially after the WB stuff and pregnancy rumors in September (?) things start to get kinda blurry and gaylors and kaylors start building different point of views. So heres what happens:

- Taylor releases the long pond sessions where she says that joe is WB. I feel like we kinda all believe he isn’t, the thing that gives it for me is mostly Taylor’s body language and the way she stutters when she says it. Also, its kinda weird that out of nowhere joe got this songwriting skills magically. Like, they’ve been “together” for four years and only now Taylor discoveres this man has better songwriting and composing skills than his actual job, idk sounds fishy to me but, you make the call.

- Pregnancy rumors starts flowing on both sides. Taylor quickly starts drinking a shit ton of wine to get her beloved swiffers to come to the realization that she is in fact not pregnant. Karlie’s rumors also starts flowing, and then the people! (?) article comes out confirming it and Karlie later posts a video on her instagram. Here’s where it gets messy. Ill try to explain shortly to you the narrative on the Kaylor side and why i don’t believe in the gaylor narrative. Obviously its your choice wheter you believe it or not.

- Kaylor: The baby is Taylor’s and Karlie’s (not gonna get into hows and stuff bc if it is actually real then it is invading their privacy too much, also speculating about this might trigger some people).

Things that back this theory up: obviously peace “give you a child”, karlie not tagging j*sh*a on her vids, that one 2,1/2 photo from the folklore photoshoot, buns and tamagochi, Taylor and Paul talking about parenthood in the Rolling Stone issue, and all the fertility imagery in evermore and folklore.

Karlie was in Cali in may until august, Taylor was also there. Jerk was on Ny or Miami cant exactly remeber. And it seems that this is what she wrote that one line “knew youd come back to me” in cardigan about. (IMO they [t and k] had some fight after the masters sale on the end of 2019 and took a break or something, so she would in fact come back to her, but just my opinion). So, karlie was there from may to august, karlie’s is on the end of her pregnancy, and if you do the math, she got pregnant sometime between june and july. Which makes it kinda impossible for the baby to be jerk’s (consequently ending the gaylor narrative) since he was in another place and karlie was on cali for like 4 months, if the baby was his, the baby would’ve been born already.

The gaylor narrative is mostly based on Taylor’s songs specially champagne problems, coney island, hoax, closure and exile.

Coney Island isn’t even necessarily a breakup song, it’s just simply a sad song, it is like death by a thousand cuts pt2, it gives the vibe that Taylor is sorry about a lot of things like not being able to thank Karlie “but when i walked up to the podium i think that i forgot to say your name”.

Like coney island, hoax is about the lows of their relationship but it’s clear in the song that taylor still loves karlie and would trade her for anything “don’t want no other shade of blue but you”

Closure and champagne: it just reminds me of Dianna for some reason i don’t even know how to explain it. Champagne Problems remind some of Dianna bc of i know places where she says “take my hand and don’t ever drop it”, to the gp that song is about harry(<3) and most songs that “are about him” are actually about Dianna. i do think it’s is kinda inspired by Karlie though.

Exile: honestly could be used to form a toe breakup narrative.

TBH we’ll probably never understand fully the story behind it. But Taylor also said that a lot of the albums are full of fantasy even thought they’re also inspired by real life situations.

Thank u for reading!! this is obviously my opinion on the matter and my take on the whole situation. feel free to believe whatever you want, and add stuff i forgot sending u lots of love <3

#thank you for putting together this timeline #submission

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bananaofswifts · 3 years

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Taylor Swift appears to be waging war over the serial resale of her old master recordings on two fronts. She recently confirmed that she is already underway in the process of re-recording the six albums she made for the Big Machine label, in order to steer her fans (and sync licensing execs) toward the coming alternate versions she’ll control. But now that she’s followed the surprise release of “Folklore” with the very, very surprise release of “Evermore” less than five months later, the thought may occur: If she keeps up this pace, she may have more new albums out on the Republic label than she ever did on Big Machine in a quarter of the time. Flooding the zone to further crowd out the oldies is unlikely to be Swift’s real motivation for giving the world a full-blown “Folklore” sequel this instantaneously: As motivations for prolific activity go, relieving and sublimating quarantine pressure is probably even better than revenge. Anyway, this is not a gift horse to be looked in the mouth. “Evermore,” like its mid-pandemic predecessor, feels like something that’s been labored over — in the best possible way — for years, not something that was written and recorded beginning in August, with the bow said to be put on it only about a week ago. Albums don’t get graded on a curve for how hastily they came together, or shouldn’t be, but this one doesn’t need the handicap. It’d be a jewel even if it’d been in progress forevermore and a day.The closest analog for the relation the new album bears to its predecessor might be one that’d seem ancient to much of Swift’s audience: U2 following “Achtung Baby” with “Zooropa” while still touring behind the previous album. It’s hard to remember now that a whole year and a half separated those two related projects; In that very different era, it seemed like a ridiculously fast follow-up. But the real comparison lies in how U2, having been rewarded for making a pretty gutsy change of pace with “Achtung,” seemed to say: You’re okay with a little experimentation? Let’s see how you like it when we really boil things down to our least commercial impulses, then — while we’ve still got you in the mood.Swift isn’t going avant-garde with “Evermore.” If anything, she’s just stripping things down to even more of an acoustic core, so that the new album often sounds like the folk record that the title of the previous one promised — albeit with nearly subliminal layers of Mellotrons, flutes, French horns and cellos that are so well embedded beneath the profuse finger-picking, you probably won’t notice them till you scour the credits. But it’s taking the risk of “Folklore” one step further by not even offering such an obvious banger (irony intended) as “Cardigan.” Aaron Dessner of the National produced or co-produced about two-thirds of the last record, but he’s on 14 out of 15 tracks here (Jack Antonoff gets the remaining spot), and so the new album is even more all of a piece with his arpeggiated chamber-pop impulses, Warmth amid iciness is a recurring lyrical motif here, and kind of a musical one, too, as Swift’s still increasingly agile vocal acting breathes heat into arrangements that might otherwise seem pretty controlled. At one point Swift sings, “Hey, December, I’m feeling unmoored,” like a woman who might even know she’s going to put her album out a couple of weeks before Christmas. It’s a wintry record — suitable for double-cardigan wearing! — and if you’re among the 99% who have been feeling unmoored, too, then perhaps you are Ready For It. Swift said in announcing the album that she was moving further into fiction songwriting after finding out it was a good fit on much of “Folklore,” a probably inevitable move for someone who’s turning 31 in a few days and appears to have a fairly settled personal life. Which is not to say that there aren’t scores to settle, and a few intriguing tracks whose real-life associations will be speculated upon. But just as the “Betty”/”August” love triangle of mid-year established that modern pop’s most celebrated confessional writer can just make shit up, too, so, here, do we get the narrator of “Dorothea,” a honey in Tupelo who is telling a childhood friend who moved away and became famous that she’s always welcome back in her hometown. (Swift may be doing a bit of empathic wondering in a couple of tracks here how it feels to be at the other end of the telescope.) One time the album takes a turn away from rumination into a pure spirit of fun — while getting dark anyway — is “No Body, No Crime,” a spirited double-murder ballad that may have more than a little inspiration in “Goodbye, Earl.” Since Swift already used the Dixie Chicks for background vocals two albums ago, for this one she brings in two of the sisters from Haim, Danielle and Este, and even uses the latter’s name for one of the characters. Yes, the rock band Haim’s featured appearance is on the only really country-sounding song on the record… there’s one you didn’t see coming, in the 16 hours you had to wonder about it. Yet there are also a handful of songs that clearly represent a Swiftian state of mind. At least, it’s easy to suppose that the love songs that opens the album, “Willow,” is a cousin to the previous record’s “Invisible String” and “Peace,” even if it doesn’t offer quite as many clearly corroborating details about her current relationship as those did. On the sadder side, Swift is apparently determined to run through her entire family tree for heartrending material. On “Lover,” she sang for her stricken mother; on “Folklore,” for her grandfather in wartime. In that tradition the new album offers “Marjorie,” about the beloved grandmother she lost in 2003, when she was 13. (The lyric videos that are being offered online mostly offer static visual loops, but the one for “Marjorie” is an exception, reviving a wealth of stills and home-movie footage of Grandma, who was quite a looker in a miniskirt in her day.) Rue is not something Swift is afraid of here anymore than anywhere else, as she sings, “I should’ve asked you questions / I should’ve asked you how to be / Asked you to write it down for me / Should’ve kept every grocery store receipt / ‘Cause every scrap of you would be taken from me,” lines that will leave a dry eye only in houses that have never known death. The piece de resistance in its poignance is Swift actually resurrecting faint audio clips of Marjorie, who was an opera singer back in the day. It’s almost like ELO’s “Rockaria,” played for weeping instead of a laugh. Swift has not given up, thank God, on the medium that brought her to the dance — the breakup song — but most of them here have more to do with dimming memories and the search for forgiveness, however slowly and incompletely achieved, than feist. But doesn’t Swift know that we like her when she’s angry? She does, and so she delves deep into something like venom just once, but it’s a good one. The ire in “Closure,” a pulsating song about an unwelcome “we can still be friends, right?” letter from an ex, seems so fresh and close to the surface that it would be reasonable to speculate that it is not about a romantic relationship at all, but a professional one she has no intention of ever recalling in a sweet light. Or maybe she does harbor that a disdain for an actual former love with that machinelike a level of intensity. What “Evermore” is full of is narratives that, like the music that accompanies them, really come into focus on second or third listen, usually because of a detail or two that turns her sometimes impressionistic modes completely vivid. “Champagne Problems” is a superb example of her abilities as a storyteller who doesn’t always tell all: She’s playing the role of a woman who quickly ruins a relationship by balking at a marriage proposal the guy had assumed was an easy enough yes that he’d tipped off his nearby family. “Sometimes you just don’t know the answer ‘ Til someone’s on their knees and asks you / ‘She would’ve made such a lovely bride / What a shame she’s fucked in the head’ / They said / But you’ll find the real thing instead / She’ll patch up your tapestry that I shred.” (Swift has doubled the F-bomb quotient this time around, among other expletives, for anyone who may be wondering whether there’s rough wordplay amid Dessner’s delicacy — that would an effing yes.) “‘Tis the Damn Season,” representing a gentler expletive, gives us a character who is willing to settle, or at least share a Christmas-time bed with an ex back in the hometown, till something better comes along. The pleasures here are shared, though not many more fellow artists have broken into her quarantine bubble this time around. Besides Haim’s cameo, Marcus Mumford offers a lovely harmony vocal on “Cowboy Like Me,” which might count as the other country song on the album, and even throws in something Swift never much favored in her Nashville days, a bit of lap steel. Its tale of male and female grifters meeting and maybe — maybe — falling in love is really more determinedly Western than C&W, per se, though. The National itself, as a group, finally gets featured billing on “Coney Island,” with Matt Berninger taking a duet vocal on a track that recalls the previous album’s celebrated Bon Iver collaboration “Exile,” with ex-lovers taking quiet turns deciding who was to blame. (Swift saves the rare laugh line for herself: “We were like the mall before the internet / It was the one place to be.) Don’t worry, legions of new Bon Iver fans: Dessner has not kicked Justin Vernon out of his inner circle just to make room for Berninger. The Bon Iver frontman whose appearance on “Folklore” came as a bit of a shock to some of his fan base actually makes several appearances on this album, and the one that gets him elevated to featured status again, as a duet, the closing “Evermore,” is different from “Exile” in two key ways. Vernon gets to sing in his high register… and he gets the girl. As it turned out, the year 2020 did not involve any such waiting for Swift fans; it’s an embarrassment of stunning albums-ending-in-“ore” that she’s mined out of a locked-down muse.

#taylor swift #evermore #review

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sneek-m · 3 years

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You Can (Not) Undo: A Look Back into Hikaru Utada's Songs for the Evangelion Rebuild Series

Originally published on Substack, as a feature of This Side of Japan issue #40.

Like its associated film, “One Last Kiss” starts with a recap to explain all that had transpired in the life of Hikaru Utada. “There was no such thing / as my first Louvre / I already met / my first Mona Lisa,” the awe-struck singer begins in the theme song for Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time. “The wheels started to turn / the day I first saw you / A premonition for loss that I couldn’t stop.” While her reminiscences provide a beautiful distraction, she ultimately can’t escape her fate where she must inevitably face the end.

The story of Neon Genesis Evangelion in the Rebuild movies looked more extravagant than its TV counterpart, revealing far grimmer scenarios over the course of four films made in the span of 14 years. But all of the new developments in the story couldn’t distract the series from leading to the same conclusion as the original—the end—and we, the audience, have to come to terms that it is now complete. “Shinji Ikari is a truly hopeless protagonist who seems to be cursed to play out his own undoing for all eternity in different realities from now until the end of time,” Willow Catelyn Maclay wrote on Mubi in 2019 about the three Rebuild movies. “It is Shinji Ikari’s fate to bear witness to the end of everything, and it is Hideaki Anno’s to tell this story again and again.”

Appropriate, then, for Utada to also be in the mood to look back for the final song in the Rebuild series. After a clean break, the singer reflects what she once had using her head as she does her heart—a privilege only earned when the experience sits at a far enough distance in hindsight. The production glows more muted and subdued perhaps than what one would imagine from a song in collaboration with A.G. Cook, but the idyllic prettiness befits the sober head space of Utada. She now resides at a place on the other side of the aftermath where she can confidently sing “I love you more than you’ll ever know” as an easy-to-hum refrain but also as an obvious truth.

Utada’s songs for the four Rebuild films now also stand as a complete series of sorts with the last film finally out, telling their own story of loss sometimes parallel to their attached films. The songs, too, are in conversation with one another, making sense of familiar catastrophes while haunted by the same ghosts. While the unwavering perspective of “One Last Kiss” is admirable on its own, it resonates more powerfully after witnessing Utada’s decade-long journey to settle on such steady ground.

Utada’s sense of peace and emotional clarity in “One Last Kiss” is already well-earned following a starker, more obvious process of grief. “Sakura Nagashi” from Evangelion: 3.0 You Can (Not) Redo finds the singer during the immediate stage of loss. And while the song also relies on reminiscences to bandage the pain like “One Last Kiss,” here the barren present is too imposing for memories to offer a sweet distraction. “I can’t believe it that I can’t see you ever again,” she cries out during the song’s guitar-squealing peak. “I haven’t told you anything yet.” So much is left unfinished while the world moves along without a care.

“Sakura Nagashi” is accompanied by the most forlorn ballad arrangement out of the three singles. While the other songs for the Rebuild films glowed with a warm, synth-led pulse, “Sakura Nagashi” is devoid of much besides Utada on an upright piano. The somber music befits a film that brought the harshest upset and destruction. During the first half of You Can (Not) Redo, Shinji Ikari bears witness to the irreversible damage he has brought to the world. He’s also shaken by the present timeline with once-familiar peers who he can no longer recognize. The first act is especially disorienting to reflect the perspective of Shinji, who can only cling on to the good things he once knew to keep moving forward.

After seeing the tragedy unfold in the later songs, it’s bittersweet returning to the fresh, wide-eyed perspective of “Beautiful World,” written when the Rebuild movies after Evangelion: 1.0 You Are (Not) Alone were yet to be made. The weightless R&B production sounds free from much of the burden plaguing the other two songs. Taken by its face, a lyric like “if I can have one wish / let me sleep next to you, it doesn’t matter where” sounds like a tender request in a soft teen-pop song and not one dedicated to a violent doomsday tale. The brooding concepts had yet to be in motion in the background of the songs, and deep loss had yet to color the lyrics into something more devastating and rooted in reality.

So when Utada revisits “Beautiful World” for Thrice Upon a Time, it adds new, powerful meanings to the old record. Titled the Da Capo version, the re-recording of the song for the first Rebuild film was commissioned to fill more time during the end credits roll. But Utada was also into the idea conceptually since the act of creating new material by revisiting the past lies at the core of the Rebuild movies.

As if inspired by You Can (Not) Redo, the new somber arrangement of the Da Capo version suggests the cruel effects of time with it containing hardly any traces of the original’s synth beats. The titular refrain arises from the void specter-like, and the rest of it floats as if in a vacuum. But while it sounds like a ghost of its former self, Utada holds as much faith, if not more in the future as she did almost 15 years ago. The original may have benefited in retrospect from her finding bliss in ignorance in the outcomes of both the beautiful world and the beautiful boy over the course of the series. But she sings here with reassured conviction, her wishes still echoing with optimism despite all she has experienced. “It’s only love,” she nonchalantly sighs, like of course she believes—it’s what unconditional love is about.

Fourteen years later, Utada isn’t free from the catastrophe of her past in “One Last Kiss” despite the rich perspectives gained. But her memories from the events now are less haunting ghosts than precious treasures to remind herself of all the good that existed. She knows she can’t undo all that already happened, knowing the story will reach the same conclusion no matter what. But it only inspires her to tell her own satisfied version of her story of love and loss. “Can you give me one last kiss / let’s have a kiss that’ll make us burn,” Utada asks in the chorus. She rewrites the end in a way she’d like to remember it. If she’s not pleased, she can always rebuild from scratch.

#Utada Hikaru #Hikaru Utada

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redqueen-hypothesis · 3 years

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tied together pt. 1 ➳ mlqc

➳ WORD COUNT: 1874

➳ GENRE: fluff

➳ SYNOPSIS: how would the mlqc boys (gavin and kiro) propose?

➳ REMARKS: this literally came out of nowhere, it’s 3am and i need to sleep. check out the inspiration for kiro’s song here!

GAVIN

he realises it on a completely average day

you’re over in his house for a surprise date-but-not-quite date, chiding him for not stocking up on his kitchen enough for you to make a proper dinner - he’s lucky you haven’t discovered his cup noodle stash in the bottom cupboard

the two of you end up ordering take in together

you’re blowing on some hot dumplings before you place them on his plate, rambling to him about your homemade food may not taste as good but is more healthy, when it hits him out of nowhere

yeah, gavin wants to have this everyday for the rest of his life

normal days don’t feel mundane in the least when you’re by his side like this, in fact, each day becomes more and more precious to him, no matter how ordinary they are

he wants to spend the rest of his life with you

this realisation almost scares him, because while he knows that he’s been in love with you for a long time, marriage is different - do you want to marry him? should he really go ahead with taking this step - making you his?

gavin is kind of out of it for the rest of the evening, just... thinking about it

imagining how you would be like if the two of you were married, his ring on your finger

his arms wrapped around you when he goes to sleep and when he wakes up in the morning

you helping him put on his tie before he leaves for work

all the cliches, he’s a sweet boy that way

gavin finds that he wants that more desperately than anything he’s ever wanted in the world, he wants to be the one that makes you happy. for the rest of your lives

the second you leave the house, gavin’s mind is scrambling to think about whether you’ll accept or not if he did propose

this goes on for a while, until one day eli calls you and asks you why gavin has been spacing out at work here and there

not enough for him to be a danger or for him to be shirking work, of course (you know how seriously gavin takes his job), but enough for eli to steal gavin’s pork chops right under his nose - and the man didn’t even realise!

that immediately has you worried

when you confront gavin about it, however, the man looks as cool as a cucumber as always

“eli thinks i’m spacing out? i noticed, i just let it slide.”

for some reason, that’s even more worrying to you (gavin giving up his meat? no way)

he’s actually panicking on the inside, oh my god eli shut up shut up shut up-

he eventually gets exposed to minor, who’s almost as ecstatic about this proposal as gavin is, this is his best bro trying to get married here!!

minor acts as gavin’s secret agent in the company, trying to figure out your ring size with the stupidest excuses

“it’s dark, i’m scared and just need to hold your hand.”

asks the most obvious questions ever like “on a scale of one to ten, how much would you like to marry gavin?”

anna, kiki and willow catch on fast enough and drag him away the second he tries to approach you in case you find out

minor has the subtlety of an elephant stomping through a china shop

plan minor is bust

gavin just gives up on elaborate planning and buys a simple ring

he doesn’t really know when the moment is the moment, so he just keeps the ring in a box in his pocket, waiting for whenever the moment shows itself

and the moment comes a few days later, when the two of you are washing up the dishes together after dinner, and he finds that he can’t stop looking at your soapy hands

part of his brain is terrified, insistent on putting it off, because what if you say no?

the other part of his brain is tired from all this wishy washy and just goes fuck it

reaches into his pocket to pull out the box and pops it open, knows he’s supposed to be kneeling but his brain isn’t working right. gavin stands there dumbly like an idiot, watching you hum to yourself as you continue soaping the dishes

even at this point, he’s still conflicted (to ask or not to ask) but luckily for him, just before he loses his nerves and shoves the ring back into his pocket, you turn around and spot the silver band in his hand

you start to tear up, shocked, while gavin internally panics because his head and tongue seem to have disconnected

forgot the script he’d spent nights working on writing and ends up fumbling out a hoarse “will you marry me?”

it’s then he realises why he’s been so terrified the entire time, he can’t chance you rejecting him, because he can’t imagine a future without you in it

you look at him as if he’s grown a second and third head, and he nearly flees out of your window before you’re wrapping your arms around his middle to tug him back into your apartment

“yes! yes, of course, yes! a million times, yes!”

there are tears in the corners of your eyes, and he brushes them away with a shaky hand before he kisses you on the lips

after the dizziness of the proposal settles down, gavin slides the ring onto your finger with gentle hands

keeps your hands together for the rest of the night

KIRO

realises it when you’ve been pouting a bit over female celebrities trying to get close to him right in front of you

he finds it cute, of course, but he feels like it’s time to settle down, to show you that he’s as much yours as you are his

the public does not know that he’s dating in secret, and the company would surely throw a fit if they know what he’s up to

decides not consult savin about this (uh oh)

has watched plenty of romance dramas, and has acted in countless of them. he knows the drill, diamond ring, tearjerker script and crying girl equals to profit!

but kiro doesn’t want that

he wants it to be special, a unique memory that only the two of you will share together

he’s releasing an album soon, it’s in the production stages, so he decides to add an unplanned song to it, one that he’ll compose and write completely from scratch on his own

manages to act pretty natural around you, although you tend to catch him staring at you with an uncommonly serious look when you’re not looking

it’s not that kiro can’t be serious, but it just isn’t like him to be silent for so long - he’s usually chattering on about something or bursting into random songs that are stuck in his head

surprisingly (to you), he consults you about the new addition to his album, asking you about your taste in music, how you feel about the lyrics

from what you can see, it’s a sweet love song with simple melodies, but deceptively emotional lyrics

he hides the full track from you though, even if you pout and whine

“you’ll just have to find out about it when it drops,” he laughs mischievously

you resign yourself to waiting for another month

the night before, kiro tells you to wait for him at the cross junction for him the next day so that the two of you can celebrate his album release together at souvenir - but he also makes you promise not to listen to the mystery track, he wants to be the first one to sing it to you, with his own lips, and his own voice

and the day it does, social media explodes into a frenzy over the mystery track, simply titled ‘sun’

while the song seems light and cheerful at first, the lyrics have a deeper meaning to them that fans can’t quite decipher, referencing memories and dates together, before bringing up hopes of a future - a future together

you don’t see all of this, however, firmly avoiding all social media to prevent yourself from breaking your promise to kiro

you’re waiting at the crosswalk for him at night after work, a little tired from your day at the office. it’s quiet from how late it is, and the streets are a rather empty, and yet, there’s still no sign of your boyfriend

kiro’s a little late

suddenly, the sounds of a guitar strumming ring out through the quiet night air, and you turn around in surprise to see kiro walking towards you slowly, playing a melody that’s both familiar, but also one that you don’t quite recognise

wait, he’s not wearing his mask or any disguises. people are already starting to turn and stare: is it really kiro? his gaze is fixed solely on you

normally, you would run to him, but the sincere, raw expression on his face glues you to the spot - others must feel it too, because not a single person dares to approach him, not with that fierce determination you see burning in his eyes

when he reaches a short distance from you, he stops and gives you a gentle smile, right before he starts to sing

“i was just one star out of infinity, but you made me your sun. this world of mine was barren, but your warmth filled me with life.”

it’s your song - the song that belongs to the two of you - of your story together, the way you’ve changed his life

“you said i belonged among the planets and the galaxy, but you held the universe inside.”

you don’t even realise you’re crying until kiro starts tearing up as well, and his voice breaks as he reaches the end of the song

“could i be selfish, reach up to pluck the stars and pull the universe into my hands?”

you know what he’s asking

“would you... be mine?”

as the song ends, kiro plucks off the ring hanging off one of the tuning pegs of the guitar, walking up to you with a shy, gentle ‘hey, miss chips’

you throw yourself into his arms when he’s halfway into kneeling, and that’s all the permission he needs to claim your mouth in front of the crowd that’s gathered at the cross junction

they scream and cheer, because it’s kiro finally getting together with the love of his life and he looks so damned happy they can’t help but feel happy for him as well

puts the ring on your finger and kisses it, stroking his thumb over it like he can’t quite believe that it’s there

the news blows up while the two of you beat an escape, kiro donning his disguise as you wrap your hand around his

the two of you have a quiet dinner in souvenir. the chef even makes a special pudding for the two of you, shaped like a small sun

savin throttles kiro the next day at work before congratulating him, and threatens to toss all his snacks in his sleep if he ever pulls such a stunt again

kiro still thinks it’s worth it

#mlqc #mlqc fanfic #mlqc headcanon #mlqc gavin #mlqc kiro #gavin bai #mr love gavin #gavin x reader #kiro #kiro zhou #mr love kiro

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