#it's pure crack

[adelalovesmadara]

I'm confused.

Is there a different naruto manga out there?

#screenshot #personal #wth #fanfic comments #reading sshn fics is torture but not as awful as nrhn and ssk fics #because sshn never interacts in the manga lol #it's pure crack #like gai/rin level or madara/kushina #💀💀💀 #fanfic #fanfiction

[carrythatwayt]

Muriel: sweetest angel in the garrison.

Pt. 2

#literally too pure #they must be protected at all costs #muriel #good omens #good omens s2 #good omens text post #good omens crack #good omens memes #i had no tumblr for 4 days and this is what happened

[innerslumber]

Me imagining Deadpool abusing the TVA in his third movie to pop in on Steve Rogers during Endgame:

Wade: Hey so, I know you got this plan to go back to the past and stay there because the writers are hacks and they can't even keep their own lore intact but LISTEN, how about you hand me those stones and I'll take care of them for ya.

Steve: *staring bewilderedly at the man in Red and Black who just materialized out of thin air* Uh...do I know you?

Wade: Wade Wilson. HUGE fan. I can do this all day. I'm just a kid from Brooklyn. Til the end of the line. Although that last one isn't gonna be real honest if we let the writers ruin a decade of character development, right? *wriggling fingers* Now let me at them sparkly Josh Brolin Space Kidney Stones.

Steve: Look, I really shouldn't be surprised by anything at this point but this is really important and I can't just hand over-

Wade: You know what else is important? Making sure we keep giving Disney the middle finger despite our inability to stop sucking their tits for content because at the end of the day, we're all victims of capitalism. So just give me the fucking stones, Captain Sexy Ass and not ruin my motivation to finish writing the 300k slow burn best friend soul mate AU Stucky fic that I've been working on for two years. Capiche?

Steve: Uhh...

Wade: *picks up the case with the stones and gives finger guns at a confused Bucky* Buckaroo, just a reminder that the serum shortens refractory periods and Wakanda is reallll nice this time of the year for honeymoon destinations. *Large Obvious Wink*

Bucky: Uhh...

Wade: *random beeping from his toolbelt* Oh gotta go! Have fun! *disappears*

Sam: *giving Steve and Bucky the Stink Eye* How short is your refractory period?

Steve and Bucky: *redfaced*

Bruce: *sighs and walks off to go make a sandwich*

#this was pure crack and i have no regrets lol #deadpool #wade wilson #steve rogers #bucky barnes #sam wilson #bruce banner #stucky #fic drabble #deadpool 3

[ohbother2]

Introducing everyone to my Alastor headcannon!

He's a deer right? And what are deer well-known for? Yes, yes, staring un-waveringly into your soul in the middle of a country road in the twilight hours.

But what else are they known for?

As soon as something happens, they are GONE. They run so fast and with such wild-abandon to just get the fuck out of wherever they are they they go hurtling through the brush never to be seen again.

This brings my to my head cannon - Alastor is easily skittish, he is just fortunate that his deer-caught-in-headlights instinct takes over long enough for him to grapple with his fear and restrain the part of himself that wants to flee, so instead he just stares unwavering and intimidatingly with that cocky grin until he has enough composure to begin talking again.

Now, sometimes, sometimes his instincts are too strong. And sometimes, he cannot stay composed, especially after a particularly bad fright, like bumping into Nifty or Angel Dust stalking the corridors of the hotel silently at night. What happens then? Alastor freezes for mere seconds, and then goes hurtling as fast as he can in whatever direction his feet decide to take him.

Sometimes, much to his dismay, his feet decide to propel him into the nearest wall before he even realises where he is heading.

This has led to many encounters where Alastor appears to bolt head-first into a wall for no other explanation than he felt like it, and he leaves Angel Dust as confused as ever as he bounces back from the impact, shocked from his deer-like-terror, and begins a conversation as normal, ignoring the new antler shaped hole in the wall he had just careened into.

No one dares question him about this odd behaviour, and the residents of the hotel have just had to accept that they often see the sole's of his shoes as he sprints full-pelt away from them at the drop of a hat.

#please tell me you can se my vision #Alastor is frozen in shock #but outwardly he looks the same as ever #if not a bit more still and less talktative #that fuckign smirk is still there thoug #and then suddenly #without warning #without explanation #he goes full-pelt in the other direction #or sometimes even straight into a wall I he is careless enough #ik this is purely a crack headcannon #but let a girl dream #Hazbin Hotel #Hazbin Hotel alastor #alastor #alastor windigo #Hazbin Hotel angel dust #Hazbin Hotel nifty #radiodust #radio demon #radiostatic #hazbin hotel

[purple-goo-writes]

Dc x Dp Prompt idea thing

Pure crack just pure fucking crack that starts with Diana showing up to a League meeting with clearly very eldritch Danny. Declaring she is babysitting her baby cousin/uncle.

Said "Baby" is very much a eldritch deep sea looking space creature that has only the vagueist grasp of human figure and stands ten feet tall. And this is only his Small Form.

#pure crack #dc x dp #dc x dp crossover #justice league crossover #dc x dp prompt #danny fenton

[ghost-bxrd]

Stony silence rings from the other end of the line, but Jason knows Bruce is listening. Listening and running through several possibilities of how someone could have gotten this number while simultaneously tracking the call signal.

This is gonna be fucking gold.

Time to sell it.

“Dad,” he sobs, pitching his voice until it breaks, teeth chattering exaggeratedly, “Dad, please, I’m scared, I-“ Jason cuts himself off with a scream and another series of sobs, “Please, I can’t— it’s locked! Please, no, Dad, it’s locked—“

A sharp intake of breath, the dull thump of something heavy colliding unexpectedly.

“Dad!” Jason cries, calling upon every single drama class he’s ever had, “Please… please- it’s almost to zero- please, I’m sorry, please, please, it hurts so much-“

Bruce breaks.

“Jason, Jason, hold on Jaylad, hold on, I will find-“

Jason smashes the phone against the marble dress of the creepy angel standing guard over his grave. The pieces vanish into the wet grass, like an occult offering eaten by Gotham’s soil.

Then Jason turns and walks away with a gleeful little smile.

But not without flipping the stupid angel off one last time.

— Grave Pretender sneak peek

#snippet #silly little one shot #this is gonna be pure crack #and comedy #jason todd #batfamily #bruce wayne #dick grayson #batfam #robin #tim drake #fic #fic rec #fanfiction #sneak peek #preview #red hood #Batman #Nightwing #batdad #pranks #pranks that go too far

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Swap!: Hazbin Hotel

-Explosion sends a tidal wave of red, green, purple, blue, and pink dust throughout the hotel. Glitter sparkles amongst the wreckage-

???: *cough-cough* Is everyone alright?

???: Yeah *cough* I'm good. I think.

???: Who the fuck lit off a max glitter bomb?! *cough-hack*

-Dust settles-

Vaggie: What the fuck was that? (pulls a bottle out from the bar and starts slugging)

Lucifer: *gasp* Vaggie! I thought we both agreed that we wouldn't drink in front of the guests!

Vaggie: (raises an eyebrow) What the fuck are you talkin' about? I'm Husk, dumbass.

Lucifer: ......Husk? (looks down at themselves) WHY AM I WEARING MY DAD'S SUIT?!?!?!

Angel: Whoa! Is this what it's like being tall? I LIKE it!!! (sees Lucifer freaking out) Holy Fuck am I short!!!!

Charlie: (checking herself out in the mirror) Hoo-hoooooh, I could definitely get used to this. You sure got the rockin' bod, Toots. I bet you'd look pretty sexy in a little piece of risqué lingerie. (kitty cat claws at the mirror) Me-ow~

Lucifer: (Charlie) Angel, I swear to all of Hell! If you do anything inappropriate in my body!

Charlie: (hops up onto the bar and crosses her legs with a dramatic kick) Whaaaaat? I wouldn't do anything. (wraps arms around Vaggie-Husk's neck) Nothin' outta the usual anyway. Hey, baby, wanna meet me up in the bedroom and get a little re-aqcuainted?~

Vaggie: (Husk) No. (walks away)

Charlie: (falls to the ground) Dammit!!! I was hopin' to get some juicy pics!

Alastor: (suddenly very green, still smiling, and holding his hand to his mouth like he's about to throw up) Alastor! Hrk! When was the last time you- oh god... -you brushed your fucking teeth?! You pompous, cheesy, talkshow, shitlor- FUCK!!! I'M GONNA PUKE!!! (rushes to the nearest potted plant and vomits)

Lucifer: (gasp) Vaggie!!! (rushes to her trapped girlfriend)

Husker: (twirling his tail like a cane and sounding like an old radio) Now, is that really any way to talk about someone, dear? I'm almost insulted.

#chaggie #huskerdust #radioapple by proxie #hazbin hotel #body swap #Husker -> Vaggie #Charlie -> Lucifer #Angel -> Charlie #Alastor -> Husker #Lucifer -> Angel #Vaggie -> Alastor #alastor #lucifer #charlie #angel #husk #vaggie #pure crack #artists have full permission to draw these - just @ me or link so I can see it!

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Steve tears the bat in half with his feet. Eddie stares at him in awe.

Eddie: *holding his own dead demobat and whispered to it* I totally get why you bit him. He's so cute. I'd bite him, too. I kind of wish he would split me in half.

Robin: *appearing at Eddie's side suddenly* If you tear pieces of my best friend's flesh off, I'm taking one of your nipples.

Much later in the hospital. . .

Eddie: *hisses at Robin* You did this. I didn't even bite him.

Robin: *frowns* It's purely coincidencental.

#stranger things #stranger things s4 #eddie munson #joseph quinn #eddie stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson lives #steddie #steve x eddie #steve harrington x eddie munson #robin buckley #robin & steve #platonic stobin #platonic with a capital p #robin & eddie #platonic reddie #pure crack fic #the demobats triggered eddie's cuteness aggression

[cookierunauprompts]

I just had a crazy idea: Shadow Milk Cookie imitating Reader Cookie as soon as he sees them.

Imagine: He comes out of his prison, everyone is shaking in fear, and then he starts scanning everyone until his eyes land on Reader Cookie and he just goes "I'mma turn into them and mess around for a while!". Then Reader Cookie feels flabbergasted/intimidated and starts fearing the worst.

In short, Shadow Milk with shapeshifting powers!

i'll do you one better, he goes after everyone's knees/hj

Requested Prompts #20 - 💓♪

You watched on as the formerly imprisoned beast shapeshifted into each of your friends, picking out a thing or two to mock them for before going on to the next. A few of your highlights of the moment were when he went after Wizard Cookie for his height(literally just turning into a taller version of Wizard Cookie), and of course, him going after the fact that Pure Vanilla keeps on trying to sacrifice himself despite the fact the world still needs him. And then, of course, he got to you. " And then there's you," Shadow Milk Cookie began, turning back to his regular form. He grabbed you by the chin, staring right into your eyes. Unfortunately he cut you off before you could ask your stupid ass question you were thinking of. " What even are you? You're a constantly shifting blob of flavor and appearance, there's literally no logical or magical explanation for that!" He let go of your chin, throwing his arms up into the air. " I mean seriously! It feels like I'm talking to a bunch of different people at once yet also just one at the same time! What the hell is up with that?" He ranted. You took joy in seeing Cookie's who could see glimpse of your true form's confusion, it had been like that with all the other ancients alongside moonlight cookie. But in all seriousness... you were probably some kind of eldritch horror condensed into a cookie. " Yeah, uh, they're just like that. Apparently." White Lily spoke up, recovering from the emotion damage she'd taken. " Really?" Shadow Milk looked at you with suspicion, and you nodded your head to confirm White Lily's words. " Huh." He eventually said, looking back to his front yet not looking at anyone. " ... That's kind of hot actually-" He immediately gets smote by the guardian strike.

TLDR ; Reader is an eldritch horror probably.

#cookie run #cookie run kingdom #cookie run au #crk #shadow milk cookie #cookie run au prompts #cr kingdom #beast yeast #shadow milk cookie x reader #pure vanilla cookie #white lily cookie #wizard cookie #crack

[infinite-orangepeel]

okay but let’s consider this:

goody two shoes, always plays by the rules, virgin but insatiably horny—eagle scout!steve harrington who winds up on known drug dealer!eddie munson’s front porch bc he’s been tasked with going door to door to fundraise for the scouts.

steve’s wearing the dorkiest khaki shorts, his too-tight vest covered in badges, and a triple buttoned polo. but, to eddie munson, he looks like something to catch, trap, and fucking destroy.

the perfect opportunity to ruin something pretty which just so happens to be his favorite pastime.

“i’ll give the entirety of my last paycheck to the scouts if you let me fuck you over my coffee table until you cry,” he licks over his canine teeth with primal desire after steve’s given his pre-prepped speech.

“no chance, munson! i’m—waiting for marriage and i’m—i’m definitely not gay,” steve adjusts the collar of his suffocating polo, staunchly offended by the offer, “some people have standards, y’know?”

eddie steps closer, invades his space, and lifts his chin with the tip of a finger. steve gulps, tries his hardest not to whimper under eddie’s knife-edge stare. eyes locked on him like a target.

“alright, fine,” his lips ghost over steve’s ear and he chuckles at how red his cheeks are, “i’ll double the donation and we’ll keep you pure as the day you were born. how’s that for a deal, sweetheart?”

two hours later, steve harrington stumbles out of eddie munson’s trailer.

hair a mess, cum staining his underwear, hickeys covering the back of his neck, and a newfound understanding of what it means to be ‘fucked between the thighs.’

the next week, he shows up again, but this time he doesn’t ask for a donation.

he asks eddie to take his virginity.

#this is pure filth and debauchery #pls enjoy and feel free to participate in the chaos #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #steve x eddie #fruity four #stranger things #steddie brainrot #eddie x steve #steve harrington/eddie munson #joe keery #baby girl steve #baby girl steve harrington #steddie au #steddie ficlet #steddie blurb #steddie headcanon #steddie stranger things #steddie crack

[ahhrenata]

had to get this out of the system. Death Stranding got its grip on me (so has Norman Reedus 😅)

#my brain at 3 am #pure color chaos but i was feeling it #i am onboard the samhiggs train #might try a doodle for them #or a version like this for Higgs maybe 🤔 #death stranding #sam porter bridges #higgs monaghan #bb 28 #samhiggs #death stranding fanart #can’t wait for the second game #any weird wavy lines is cause my screen is cracked still and i give up on making them as straight/clean as possible lol #misc fanart

[eternity-death]

Okay guys now it’s time to consider…

Sunday being in love with Reader… but being unable to act on his feelings because The Dream Master disapproves of it…

The yearning in this would be INSAAAAAANNNE.

#hsr x reader #sunday x reader #honkai star rail x reader #it is pure agony for him #he can deal with it somewhat bc you’re already pretty close and see each other frequently #so it’s not like he has to yearn from afar #but one might say that the closeness makes it even worse #like when you’re submerged in a dream and you’re chasing something unattainable #and it’s right in front of you but suddenly your whole body is heavy and even though it’s right at the tips of your fingers you just… #… can’t quite reach far enough #every time you mention someone with potential a romance in mind his entire body goes cold #he freezes up and that mask of his cracks #and that smile he always wears becomes all the more difficult to keep up #Sunday wants you to be happy… but the more selfish part of him wishes that you never find anyone to fall in love with

[kenandeliza]

A [crack] Brotherly Freddy and Billy comic to start my new year :p

It's based on a random stupid Headcanon where Freddy is much older than Billy [maybe 5 or 7 years older??], making it even ironic for his name to be "Captain Marvel jr", (I also like to think he had a similar reaction to Mary, something like, "I've always wanted a sister!" Then hug her, but since i couldnt draw Mary's poofy hair correctly, one can only imagine ;-;)

#crack comic #pure crack #billy and freddy #billy batson #dc comics #kenandeliza's art #captain marvel #dc characters #shazam #procreate #freddy freeman #big brother freddy freeman #captain marvel jr

[seulgishaku]

Percy using the whistle to call Mrs. O Leary in the battle of the labyrinth but instead Jason responds cause he can hear those frequencies and that's how Greeks and Romans meet each other

#hoo #pjo #jason grace #percy jackson #pure crack #makes no sense #op is aware #but surprisingly #she don't care #can you #call this #jercy #yes u can

[xuxudio]

successfully choosing the most doomed ship in any media since 1999

#qsmp #q!bbh #q!forever #bbh #forever #4halo #badboyhalo #qbbh #qforever #what a mess of tags mb #drawing #paper #sketch #wip #man IVE BEEN IN THE TRENCHES #IVE SHIPPED THESE 2 SINCE LIKE THE 4TH DAY FOREVER JOINED AND IT WAS PURELY CRACK BACK THEN. THERE WERE 5 FICS ON AO3 THE 1ST TIME I CHECKE #AND NOW. NOW I'M SO WELL FED. THEYRE BASICALLY CANON. THEY ARE SO SLOW BURN AND SO ANGST AND ITS SO GOOD. #AND NOW ITS GODDAMN OVER #well i'll still be going insane inside my silly little head #but yeah i am feeling many fucking emotions bros

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Ducks vs Horses: Helluva Hazbin

Lucifer: Ducks!

Blitz: Horses!

Lucifer: Ducks!!!

Blitz: Horses!!!

Charlie: What are they doing?

Vaggie: Apparently, that imp, Blitz, saw your dad in horse form on the news and came to tell him that he was "fucking majestic". Somehow it turned into a battle of horses vs ducks.

Lucifer: (pulls a majestic looking rubber duck out of his pocket) DUCKS!!!

Blitz: (pulls a toy horse out of his pocket) HORSES!!!

Lucifer: (leans in) DUUUUUUCKS!!!

Blitz: (presses his face against Lucifer's) HOR-SES!!!!

Lucifer: .....Duck sized horses?

Blitz: .....Horse sized ducks?

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

-Channel 666 News Theme Plays-

Katie Killjoy: Good evening, denizens of Hell. The top story tonight is a wild herd of duck sized horses have taken siege of Pentagram City while a fleet of horse sized ducks have taken to the skies.

#helluva boss #blitzo #blitz #hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #ducks #horses #horse sized ducks #duck sized horses #pure crack