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#lmaooo and he's loved every minute of it
cementcornfield · 6 months
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https://x.com/insidethenfl/status/1722062127437955148?s=46&t=4nsvGMTnbYsCN_2D0a2rJg
You don't have to tell me to get Ja'Marr the ball.
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shima-draws · 2 months
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Suddenly got the inexplicable urge to watch the Cats musical again. And then I remembered this ask I answered on my sideblog and giggled like an idiot
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starberry-skies · 7 months
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i mean, i see why we didn't, but i rlly wish we saw basil's Something more. like got more detail on what he was feeling and why, yk? how it differs from what sunny sees... that typa thing
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stealthily · 2 years
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hi i used to do riding lessons and yeah you're completely right. the two horses i rode the most (belonging to the lovely instructor) were misty this super sweet flea bit that was super easy to ride i loved her and then the most bitchy paint sparkle that once ate hay in the middle of the lesson and refused to stop. i would kill for sparkle to this day
SPARKLE FKDJSKSKS WHAT A FITTING NAME, THAT’S AMAZING. I can PICTURE the menace she must’ve been. No truly though it’s the difficult horses that keep life interesting!! Like yes they’re assholes, yes I would die for them, no they wouldn’t care if I did, yes I would still readily do it anyway ❤️
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oddinary4bts · 3 months
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To Give a Helping Hand | jjk
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☆summary: when Jungkook comes home from the gym, he goes feral thinking about you.
☆pairing: idol!Jungkook x female reader
☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI)
☆genre: smut, idol!au
☆warnings: unedited, curses, explicit content: masturbation. that's it, that's the whole thing. Cumshot on his hand tattoos. Jungkook is hella horny for reader and jerks off thinking about her - fantasies of oral sex (male and female receiving), of unprotected sex, of rough sex, of hickeys and marking (scratches on the back), of shower sex, of spanking, of choking, of creampies, of clit play, of fingering and squirting. Multiple orgasms, lowkey pain kink and praise kink (let me know if I forgot something)
☆word count: 1.8k (I think it's the shortest thing I've ever written on here lmao)
☆a/n: pure unedited sins bc mr jeon jungkook makes me horny despite being in the army. hope this doesn't disappoint lmaooo thank you to @wintaerbaer for her help with the banner (it would have been a horrible mess without your guidance) and for encouraging me to write this!! love you Ari <3333
☆☆☆☆☆
You’re driving him insane.
You. Are. Driving. Him. Insane.
Insane.
Every time Jungkook sees you at the gym, he goes insane. Completely, utterly, insane. He thinks there has to be a better word in the dictionary to describe what you do to him but, alas, he can’t find it.
So insane it is, and he tries to live up to the name.
He’s been home for five minutes, and he’s already in his bed, dick so hard he thinks it’ll explode. Because of course you had to be doing squats today, in those way too tight biker shorts that leave nothing to the imagination. Your thick ass, stretching the fabric so much he thinks he spied a thong underneath…
Jungkook grunts, hiding his eyes behind his arm, trying to erase the picture from his mind. But he can’t. You’re everywhere – behind his closed eyelids, or a ghost in his room when he opens his eyes again.
It’s been that way since the very first day he saw you at the gym. Jungkook caught sight of you and immediately had a boner, which hadn’t happened to him since he was a teenager. He’s a grown man, for fuck’s sake, yet the sight of you turns him on far more than anything ever has.
You’re just… perfect. Too hot, your body perfectly sculpted by the hours you spend at the gym every week. Jungkook dreams of dragging his hands, his tongue, on every inch of your body. Of caressing your hard-earned muscles, of gripping the meat of your ass…
Of grinding into you and hearing the little breathy moans he’s sure that you make in the thralls of passion.
Fuck.
If he’s honest, he would have fucked you that first time. Would have approached you and charmed you, seduced you until he’d have you writhing under his body. But one look – one damn look – at your keychain, and he knew you were off limits.
The bright pink Kooky plushie hanging from the keychain was a firm reminder that he cannot approach you, ever. Indeed, he doesn’t mix pleasure with work, which is starting to prove increasingly hard as he gets more famous, and as his fans grow way too numerous.
As his fans, as you pretend that you don’t recognize him when you go to the gym, even though he catches you looking at him all the time. Yet he can’t approach you, won’t approach you, ever. But nothing stops him from exploring his dirty little fantasies, whenever he wraps his hand around his cock…
Jungkook grunts, and he decides to take manners into his own hands, literally. He wishes it’d be your hand, gripping his cock once he’s pushed his shorts and underwear down. Wishes you’d hold him tight as you’d jerk him off slowly, eyes never leaving his.
He imagines you taking him in your mouth. Your plump lips, wrapping around the tip of his cock, sucking once as he’d fist your hair, restraining himself from thrusting in your mouth. Or maybe you’d give him the go to fuck your mouth, to unleash himself on you…
Jungkook moans, and he jerks himself off, slowly. Eyes closed as he imagines everything he wants you to do to him, everything he wants to do to you. His hand is not nearly enough to pleasure him, not when he’s been craving you the way that he has…
But it’ll make do.
Spitting in his other hand, Jungkook holds his dick up to rub the natural lube on the head of his cock. He winces – he’s already so damn sensitive… Probably because he’s sported a semi since he saw you at the gym.
Who gave you the right to go to the gym in those shorts, with only a sports bra to pair with them? You looked devilish, downright sinful, and you’ve dragged him to hell.
Once his dick is lubed up, glistening in the dim light from the hallway because he sure as hell didn’t have time to turn the lights on in his room, Jungkook strokes himself, slowly. Tattooed fingers firmly wrapped around his cock, just the way he likes it – right under the tip, hard enough to hurt just a little bit.
Hard enough to make him wish he was fucking your tight pussy instead. He imagines the drag of your walls on his dick, on his veins and on the ridge of his tip. He imagines your breasts bouncing up and down as you’d ride him, and then your face, contorted in pleasure, as he’d jackhammer into you.
He’s had noise complaints from his neighbours once, because of the loud singing he does once in a while, when he goes live for his fans. Right now, he wishes he’d get a noise complaint because they’d hear him fucking you good, fucking you until you’d crumble into ecstasy.
He picks up the pace on his dick, free hand grabbing at the white sheet of his bed. Would you be the type to moan unabashedly loud? To say his name when you come, when your walls flutter on his dick?
The thought makes his dick twitch in his hand, and Jungkook grunts again, curses underneath his breath. He doesn’t even know your name, but he sure as hell knows he’d come with your name a litany on his lips, a sinful melody he’d sing just for you to hear.
Would you drag your nails on his back, marking him so that the world knows you’re his? Would you suck on his neck, leave hickeys behind that he’d have to hide under foundation? Would you beg for him, or would you be a brat?
He wants you to be a brat. He wants to have to put you back into your place, to spank your ass and choke you until all you know is his name. He’d be feral with you – he’s feral just thinking about you. And maybe one day he’ll betray his number one rule, maybe one day he’ll fuck you into the night, hear you cry with pleasure as he’d pump his load inside of you…
His imagination is running wild, and his pace on his dick is relentless, unforgiving. His bicep burns already, even though he’s barely started. Or maybe he’s just too lost in his fantasies, losing track of time. But he doesn’t care – he’d lose track of time fucking you, too.
“Fuck,” he moans, eyes closed tightly, eyebrows bunched together as if in pain. But he’s not hurting – he feels way too good, the pleasure running through his blood a symphony every cell inside of him is addicted to.
You’re just too beautiful to him. He’d fucking crawl on his knees for you, or maybe he’d make you crawl. He’d force you to crawl, to beg for him, to…
Jungkook grunts loudly, his orgasm hitting so hard it feels like a trainwreck. He doesn’t slow down his pace on his dick right away, letting his cum spurt out and drip on his fingers, on the back of his hand. He doesn’t even care if he makes a mess – he’s lost to his pleasure, and he doesn’t want to come back to sanity. He wants to stay insane, and so he drags his orgasm out, milks it out of himself.
And he comes a lot, painting his whole fucking hand white. He’d think it to be disgusting, but when he looks down at his hand, fuzzy from his blissed-out pupils, he sees that he’s covered his tattoos with cum. His army tattoo – the closest he’ll get to come on you. He curses at the sight, hates that it’s turning him on again and that his dick twitches, begging for more. But all he does is watch the cum – it covers the three first letters, but it’s slowly dripping towards the y, and soon the whole tattoo will be covered, like he fucking wishes your pussy would be covered with his cum, dripping with it. He’d finger you with it.
Fucking hell.
Jungkook gives in to the unrelenting desire once he’s in the shower, trying to clean himself. A single thought of your thick ass and the stretched fabric of your biker shorts sends him back to square one, and he jerks himself off again, fast and hard, his free hand leaning on the wall. He’s quick to shift and put his forearm against the wall instead, hiding his face in his arm. And then he imagines fucking you in this shower, taking you from behind as your ass cheeks shake from his ministrations. He imagines you trying to find purchase on the wall, your hands slipping until he pulls you back into his chest. He’d hold you tight, wrap a hand around your neck, and he’d find your clit with his other hand.
He’d make you come so fucking hard. All night long. He doesn’t think he’d let you even fucking walk out of his apartment. He’d fuck you seven days a week, wouldn’t even leave his bed.
This time, his release hits differently, not as strong. It still fills his blood with ecstasy, and his head swims as he watches his cum go down the drain. His hand, his tattoos, are mostly clean this time around, and he imagines them covered in your cum instead. In your sleek juices as he’d finger you, making you squirt everywhere…
He curses loudly, turning the shower to cold, immediately wincing as the water hits his back. But it’s the only way he thinks he’ll manage to chase his arousal away. Hell, he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his fucking evening masturbating. Though it’d be worth it, and he’s fully aware that he’d be able to. He’d just need to think of you, and he’d be ready to go again.
But when he steps out of the shower, he decides otherwise. He decides to go live – are you watching him, from wherever it is that you live in this city? Do you know that you make him insane, so, so insane that he just came twice to the thought of you?
He smirks, watching the comments coming in even though he hasn’t said anything yet. They fly too fast for him to be able to read anything, but he knows.
He knows that you’re there, on the other side of the screen, watching him as he watches you. Where else would you be?
And he knows damn well that next time he’ll see you, he’ll talk to you. Fuck the rules, fuck the fact that you’re his fan. He needs to fuck you, to know what your pussy taste like and how you sound when you come.
So next time he sees you, instead of jerking himself off alone, Jungkook knows he’ll ask you to give a helping hand.
Next
☆☆☆☆☆
Welcome to the land of sinning lmao hope you enjoyed this short ride! Let me know what you thought - it always motivates me to write more stuff like this ;)
All rights reserved to @/oddinary4bts, 2024. Do not copy, repost or translate.
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mochikofi · 9 months
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Jasper Hale being your boyfriend
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Boy let me tell you... This dude is a SIMP. He always wait for you after class and he always carry your things. He's basically your personal bodyguard and boyfriend.
He's not a fan of PDA that much but when you're both alone he will straight up hug you, but not too tight... He's afraid that he will hurt you.
He rarely gets jealous because he knows that your his soulmate but sometimes when boys gets touchy with you he will go to you and straight up say: "Darling, are they bothering you?" While glaring at them.
He knows that he will need to turn you into a vampire soon but he can't help but feel sad because he likes your eyes. But he doesn't have a choice so he's just enjoying the memories with you as a human.
Sometimes he sneaks in your room just because he misses you or when he's bored. He enjoys seeing your surprised face.
He decided that it's time for you to meet his family but he's kinda nervous lmao but in the end it worked out.
Esme LOVES you even when she just met you. She loves seeing your smile so she always finds a way to see you smile.
Carlisle just smiles at you and welcomes you in the family cuz he knows you're gonna get turned soon and He's glad that jasper finally have someone to love.
Alice, being the sweet girl she is hugs you and say "it's nice to finally meet you" and she keeps talking about fashions and how she loves your outfits.
Rosalie hated you at first but then warmed up to you and always hangs out with you. She always makes you sit in their table when it's lunch time. You're her favorite human and soon to be vampire.
Emmett was super excited to meet you, he wants to create chaos with you lmaooo. He always gives you stupid ideas to do with him, which leads to jasper saying: "No, not happening on my watch."
Edward and bella.. ehh their nice and welcomes you but their always lovely dovely with each other so you rarely interact with them, but you think their nice and they think you're nice too.
You always go to their house to hang out with them cuz who wouldn't want to be with them? Playing chess with edward, creating chaos with emmett, having fashion show with alice, cooking with esme, learning history with carlisle, having girl talks with rosalie, and cuddling with jasper.
You know who and what they are and you know you're gonna get turned into a vampire soon so you cherish all of your last moments with your human life.
And as soon as you turned into a vampire, jasper won't stay away from your side. He always admire you, staring at you like you're the only woman in his eyes.
When you're awake he calls Carlisle to help you control your thirst, and their actually shocked that you learned how to control it in a short time, but their proud of you especially emmett cuz.. chaos yk.
And having you as a vampire means he doesn't need to hold back. Kind of. But he can finally do things with you without holding himself back.
He always hunts with you to see how strong and fast you are. And he's not surprised you're stronger and faster now, it only made him fall inlove with you more.
Even if you're a vampire now, he still protects you and stay by your side. And again, he still carries your bag. But you won't complain, princess treatment is the best.
Edward is kind of annoyed cuz his mind is filled with you. Like literally every minute he thinks about you.
And when you both finally graduate, he plans on marrying you in like 3-4 months because yes he's been wanting to marry you.
And when you're both finally getting married he have the biggest smile on his handsome face. Makes you fall inlove with him more.
He literally can't wait so he straight up kissed you when it's just announcing lmaoooo.
But he's glad to finally have you in his life. He will protect you always and he will forever love you. Well, let's just say this is a "he fell first but she fell harder but he fell hardest." If hardest is even a word- but then again, it's cute.
movie masterlist. - navigation.
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alwaysshallow · 7 months
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previous part AND next part
the idea is, you're higher ranked than ghost, and he kinda has a crush on you, which, obviously, he doesn't show. he brings you tea, runs with you, just to be around you more.
Simon is on his way to you with his tea, made specifically for you, when he hears you, speaking with someone on the phone. His senses tells him it's better to pop up other time, but he's too nosy for that. So, he stops in his tracks, listening who could you be so in conversation with.
"It's- yeah, honey. It's just a difficult mission, 'm gonna... stay a bit longer in the job. I'm so sorry."
Honey? He can't figure out if it's you speaking to your kid, or, God forbid, husband. Maybe you are bubbly and oversharing, but in the same time, he knows nothing about you, besides the fact that you prefer to work by yourself, and then lead your team. It's something that lingers on his mind; you never told team you're married, but you would if you are, yeah?
Why keep these things to himself?
It's a dumb question. Simon knows better than anyone it's better to keep everything hidden, especially if it's about something so fragile like a family. Yet, he can't keep himself from wondering, if your hand is taken by someone.
If so, he'd be lucky to have you, he thinks. You're such a lovely person, so... warm, a feeling that Simon hasn't experienced in a long, long time.
He knocks a minute after you end the conversation - minute and three seconds to be exact, he doesn't want you to suspect anything. To know he was listening, it's not professional, he's aware. He's aware of many unprofessional things, not the first time he did something like this. Thoughts in his mind are rushing; how to approach you, how to make you say something about this phone call, but he only nods in a silent greeting, leaving mug with tea on your desk.
You speak first. "Needed that, especially today. Thank you, Simon."
Simon. You're one of the people that refuses to call him Ghost. He feels giddy every time he hears that.
"'s nothing." he shrugs, looking at you with question in his eyes; why today? You're the one who's willing to tell him things, so it's not bad to pull the strings a bit, no? "Everything's alright, colonel?"
It takes you a few seconds to answer, when you warm your hands around big mug. "Mad family. Nothing new."
"Husband?" he asks, before he thinks; he feels a cool shiver down his spine. It slips, he didn't intend to ask that, to say that. In one second, it's just a thought, and in another, it's something he says out loud.
His control is crushing.
Surprisingly, you're not mad. You're more... sad, but you're smiling anyway. "Married life is complicated." you nod, and it's enough for him to just nod as well, and leave the room.
You're married.
It complicates everything.
LMAOOO PLOTTWIST HEY
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wolfiezz · 5 months
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You should write about your big werewolf bf submitting to you and becoming your “pet” for the night LMAOOO 🙏🔥
I would literally love this hello 🦇
(sorry if it looks kinda rushed)
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Big strong werewolf boyfriend who’s the alpha of his pack. Doesn’t take shit from any betas, nor omegas. The biggest werewolf you’ve ever even seen.
Big strong werewolf boyfriend who suddenly turns into a big puppy whenever you’re near. His tough, aggressive demeanor crumbles. And all he can do is stay by your side and practically beg for your attention. Whining, wagging his tail, and pawing at your hips. Even though he’s much, much bigger than you. He could easily crush you if needed, but why would he? You’re his beloved mate after all.
Big strong werewolf boyfriend who snaps at the other pack members when they merely lay on eyes on you. You’re his. He should be the only one able to get your love and affection.
Big strong werewolf boyfriend who suddenly comes to you with a collar and leash in hand, face flushed, and ears turned down in embarrassment. All he can mumble is, “could I be your pet for night?” You oblige, of course. Who wouldn’t? This is an offer you might not get ever again.
Big strong werewolf boyfriend who’s crying, writhing around on the sheets, wrists bound and cock still hard. He’s dizzy from overstimulation, but doesn’t dare stop you, it’s all too much for him, yet, he doesn’t want you to stop just yet.
Big strong werewolf boyfriend who’s wrists are worn, and his cock his swollen and soft, his vision blurry and his body aching. Only to praise you for how good you made him feel a few minutes.
Big strong werewolf boyfriend who happily lets you clean him off with a hot, wet rag, it soaks through his fur and gets on his skin, he likes it, most of the time. He lays there panting, looking up at you with the cutest puppy dog eyes in the world, just happy that you’re there for him.
Big strong werewolf boyfriend who now does this with you. Every. Single. Night. He just can’t get enough of it.
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all444miles · 9 months
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can you please do 42!miles with a baddie like a Megan type vibe? SHE HAS A PINK JEEP
💗💗💗💗
— SHE A BADDIE
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— pairing: e42!miles x fem!black!reader — genre: fluff — summary: what its like for 42 miles to date a reader with a "baddie like megan" vibe. — a/n : i felt like i was a lil lazy writing this, sorry ! can yall tell i got excited abt the jeep n the attitude part.. its litch what kept me writing this whole thing 😭 also, a car creeper is those lil things u slide under to fix the underside of ur car — a/n 2: changed the way i start writin a jus a lil, petition for head over heels 42 miles supremacy !! + this was so fun.. like i was writing this n i was like "lemme be this when i grow up" LMAOOO so ty for the request anonnn, mwah and enjoy !!
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MILES FALLS IN LOVE with you every second. like, honestly, just do anything, he's wrapped around your finger.
maybe he'll try and hide it, but you make him fold 24/7. you dont even have to do nothing.
it's just something about your energy, the way you dont give a damn about nothing, he just loves it. y'all are like beast boy and raven.
"mama, you killin' me right now." "hm? did i do somethin'?" "i love you so, so much. i swear, you make me weak." "aww, hun, I love you more." "yeah, keep dreamin'. now, lemme love on you."
hype man, hype man, HYPE MANN
when I say if you want to do anything he's here for it, he's here for it.
you wanna get your hair done? he's at your service.
you wanna go to the mall? he's already throwing you the keys to your jeep.
you wanna get your nails done? show him your options (he always likes the french tips, esp this.)
"Y'know Miles, i think this set ain't looking too good no more.." "You wanna get new nails?" "Mhm, wanna help me pick?" "'Course I do, let's see em."
does not care what you wear, he's always gonna say you look gorgeous. plus, he can fight. but, he's always got his hands on your waist. always.
you're your own girl, he knows that. he spoils you, yes, but he'll always let you do your own thing.
he can't explain it, but when you refer to him as "my man", or your anything, really, it does something to his heart.
yk when latto goes "ty to my man"? yeah, that's you.
"My nails? Yeah, my man helped me pick 'em."
you have attitude. Miles doesn't mind, he's a "yes ma'am" kind of guy, but if it's to him, hes gonna shut you down.
a lot of the times, you won't care, and it won't end in an argument, becuase he's still shutting you down regardless.
"Miles, you lost your shit or sum." "Amor, drop that tone f'me, aight?"
you are a party animal, and Miles? He'll just be in the back, watching you do your thing with your friends. If you ask him to dance with you though, he will for sure.
Will he throw money on you? Yes, yes he will. (Not sexual btw !)
Your jeep. He has his own car, but he honestly loves yours the best.
He helped you decorate it, all pretty and pink
He will happily get in your jeep while you blast Megan or Rihanna because c'mon now, who wouldnt?
I'm insistent he's good with mechanics, so he'll tune your car whenever you need him to, bryson tiller or tory lanez playing while he does so. (i'm losing my shit rn.)
"Cariño, ¿puedes pasarme esa llave inglesa? It's to ya left." (Baby, can you pass me that wrench?)
he'd say, sliding out from the car creeper under the hood of your pink jeep, sliding back in after you passed him the tool.
and after about 15 minutes, he'd come back out, putting a dirty cloth over his shoulder, wiping the sweat from his forehead.
its a sight to see: white tank top, slightly stained with grime from fixing your car; his favorite gold chain glistened in the sun, adorned with beaded glints of sweat from his neck.
"Aight, i think she's good, you can start her up if you wanna." "Yay! thank you for fixing my car, baby, I love youu."
you'd squeal, wrapping your arms around his neck to plant a kiss on his cheek, your pink tinted lip gloss staining his face.
"Ain't no problem princesa, I love you too."
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© all444miles 2023. do not plagerize, copy, or repost my work in any way shape or form, without my permission.
likes, reblogs, comments and asks are always appreciated !
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writingstoraes · 1 year
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paddock greetings 💌
pairing: charles leclerc/fem!reader
type: instagram imagine/social media au
notes: not proofread and not revised so please expect errors hehehe please lmk what u think by replying or messaging and if u wanna be part of my taglist! <3 this is a bit long! hehe
about: for your 5th anniversary and engagement, the drivers send their greetings with a bit of banter in the comments as always.
lewishamilton
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liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, arthurleclerc, and 1,560,431 others
lewishamilton Greeting this two a happy 5-year anniversary and wishing them the best as they take another massive and wonderful step in their life! Best wishes to the best couple I know ❤️
charles_leclerc Thank you, mate! Also huge thanks for setting me up with her, wouldn't be here without you 😅
lewishamilton Well you wouldn't stop asking about her so I gave in 🤷‍♂️
charlesrari LMAOOO SIR LEWIS AIRING OUT CHARLES' BUSINESS LIKE THAT
yourusername thank you, lew! wow imagine if i never went on that blind date...
pierregasly I think you would have found someone better
charles_leclerc You have one minute before I pay a visit to your room.
pierregasly
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liked by carlossainz55, lilymhe, yourusername, and 506,771 others
pierregasly Congratulations on the engagement of the two craziest people I know 🥂 Pls stop asking me to take cheesy pictures of you guys sometimes what you do in front of me is unacceptable. I still remember being behind the camera when I took you guys' infamous yacht shots 😮‍💨
yourusername not you saying we're improper im literally the third wheel when you and charles are together???
pierregasly Y/N you took Charles away from me can you blame me
charles_leclerc Pierre what
pierregasly Are you choosing your wife over me? Wow okay that hurts mate
danielricciardo
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liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername, arthurleclerc, and 905,660 others
danielricciardo Some outtakes from my camera of Y/N and Charles. This was the first time Charles took Y/N on a trip with us and they honestly just bring out the best in each other. No better day to post this than now. Congratulations on the engagement, you two! 🎉 Wishing you live a life filled with love and happiness.
yourusername DANIEL WTH this is so pretty :(( these pictures are a blessing, thank you danny 🤍
charles_leclerc Thank you, Daniel! And thank you for my new wallpaper hahaha
carlossainz55 You're replacing me already?
charles_leclerc Mate you were never my wallpaper
pierregasly Don't even bother Carlos he's a married man now
yourusername what i have to deal with every day...
landonorris
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen, charles_leclerc, and 432,679 others
landonorris Congratulations on the engagement Y/N and Charles! I want to let you know that I am utterly disgusted by the two of you please stop flirting in front of me ❤️
yourusername you greeted us but at what cost
charles_leclerc ... Thanks???
ferrarifan3 Lando greeting like a true friend we love to see it
charloslove LMAO I KNEW LANDO WOULD HAVE THE FUNNIEST GREETING
carlossainz55
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liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername, isahernaez, and 860,560 others
carlossainz55 Love you both to bits but honestly third-wheeling with you guys has got to be one of the worst experiences ever. "It'll be fun, Carlos," but then they'd leave me in the middle of the road - this happened in Madrid by the way and I will never live it down. Happy engagement, Charles and Y/N 😁
charles_leclerc Carlos we did not leave you we just bought food
carlossainz55 You were gone for 30 minutes?
charles_leclerc The taco line was long you said you wanted tacos!
myferrarimen this banter is what i live for honestly
yourusername why were u in the middle of the road anyway
carlossainz55 I dont remember 🤷‍♂️
charles16 how carlos doesnt get lost on a daily basis is a mystery to me
pierregasly Lmaooo they left you
yukibabie "I will never live it down" king of grudges
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tagging: @slytherheign <33 hope ur video recording for class went well mwah
notes: thought this was a rlly cute idea and my classes start on monday so its a bummer :// my masterlist is up and running so u can navigate thru my works on my pinned post! lmk what u guys think <33
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chrollohearttags · 8 months
Note
Okay Cherry if this is any good indulge me by going wild with this prompt loosely based on my life at work. If it's not good then this never happened lmaooo!
Picture this, Eren works as a salesmen for whatever company you want and one of his charges has a sweet secretary type who always starts off the phone call real formal but then slips into this cheery, almost flirty tone as she rattles on about her bad knee or the latest video game or her yarn order out for delivery last she checked 20 minutes ago (a lil self-indulgent, i know).
He always indulges her and even shares some insights on his life too so now they have each other's sun signs, favorite color, and worst month before she passes the call over to her boss to make the weekly orders.
But one week he's in her city, kinda like a "stop in and say hi to your clients/rep the company" type of deal and he finally sets eyes on the sweetheart who always has a comeback for whatever silliness she gets him to say and dammit if this man didn't almost fallover when he sets eyes on that pretty face. And fuck him side ways when he catches her retreating to the back room. He'll obviously be around the next day around closing time to hopefully take the little lady out (and give her the deepest backshots) before he has to fly home next week.
AHFHDHRJDGSHS babes your mind!!!! >>>>>> this is so genius!!! 🫠🫠🫠 I hope I can do it justice tbh because this has my wheels turning! And thank you for all the beautiful asks you sent me, I’m so sorry it’s taken this long for me to get around to them. But I promise I will be answering them all VERY soon!! 🥹🫶🏾
Eren always strived to be the best at what he done. Whether it was athletics or academics, he always excelled above his peers in every area. The same applied once he was hired as a salesman for the Mercedes Benz dealership in his city. It didn’t take long for the young associate to find success in his career field. From his devilish good looks to his suave charm…possessing the gift of gab that could sell flames to the devil. It didn’t take long before he was the highest earning employee in not the district but soon the region. In a year’s time, he had worked his way up to regional manager and oversaw the entire store.
it came with big responsibilities but even bigger perks. He got to travel to all these places on the company’s dime. Stay in lavish hotels, work poolside and even party all at their expense. But it was to be expected of a young, handsome bachelor like himself. Even so, he was as cautious as he was reliable. He worked hard to maintain his standing but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t long for the companionship of another person as well. Luckily for him, he found it in the form of someone he’d least expect. While sifting through a new client list for potential tools and parts for the auto repair team, he came across one that he had never seen before but soon, he’d become even more acquainted with them..or rather, the person who was always on the other end. Yes, the sweet, cheery voice of the babe who answered every phone call. The one who always addressed him as ‘sir’ or Mr. Jaeger and would relay his messages with efficiency along with a ‘my pleasure’ in the most angelic voice he’d ever heard. One that sent flutters all throughout his body each time he heard it. Eventually, he had to know the name of the little lady who had him grinning from ear to ear as he sat with his feet propped up on his office desk. “And to who do I have the pleasure of speaking to, miss? I’d love to put a name to that beautiful voice.” Naturally, she divulges him and reveals her identity. “The name’s (y/n) (l/n). Of course, sweetheart and love suits me just fine.” As he had spoiled you with the sweet pet names. That you’d return with a quickness and send him into a blushing fit. Very unbecoming of the normally collected and stoic man. Eventually, he’d keep the conversations going on a bit longer than anticipated or allowed just to hear more from the once anonymous woman; finding solace, comfort and routine in hearing about work and personal affairs. Chatting it up with you long after the business side of things had been conducted.
time went on and the two of you had grown quite fond and accustomed to the regular phone calls that ensued almost three times a week at this point. Laughing and joking like old friends whom had known each other forever. “I swear, I call at least three times a week and you always answer. Do they ever give you a break?” “Poor things, they’d fall apart without me. Besides, it’s not all bad. I get talk to you so I’d say I’m pretty lucky.” Of course, he loved the flattery. You would find anything to speak on just to keep the conversation going. From your newest crochet project, to his recent acquisition of those new sneakers he’d had his heart and sights set on for a while. Everything from favorite foods, TV shows and colors were revealed in the calls. The funniest perhaps, may have been the topic of astrology and zodiac signs and he had not the slightest clue about that but by the next chat, he told you his sun, rising and moon and you couldn’t help but to chuckle at the fact that he could rattle it off so easily now. “What? A man can’t get curious? It’s interesting stuff.” “Absolutely. I just think it’s so cute. Maybe we can talk about it in person one day over some coffee.”
he holds you to that offer..about a week or so after that conversation when he pays a visit to your workplace as part of a client check in. Essentially shaking hands to maintain good relations with the vendors. But it wasn’t until he went up to the reception desk that he’d get the shock of a lifetime to learn that the pretty lady sitting before him was the one behind the beautiful voice that he chopped it up with almost daily. Big, bouffant curls, round glasses on that gorgeous face with a divine complexion and the most innocuous of eyes. His heart thudded and his face visibly flushed red when you told him your name and extended a hand to properly introduce yourself. It doesn’t take long for him to return it and with a kiss to boot. “I’m happy to finally put a face to that adorable voice.” Smirking as he proceeds to turn and address your other coworkers, who were mechanics and techs, but it’s when you get up to head to the back room; inviting him along under the guise that you had some paperwork for him to complete. And he follows with bells on!..
once you two are alone, all bets are off along with every article of clothing on your bodies. Propping you up on a countertop and grasping the backs of your thick thighs because they looked too good swaying in that tight skirt. Only after a very intense makeout session. Shoving your tongues into each other’s mouths as if you were long distance lovers and not perfect strangers. Even so, it didn’t let up there…peeling your top off and groping those beautiful tits that fit so perfectly in his palms. Taking those sweet little brown nipples into his mouth and suckling as you rode his fingers that he shoved knuckle deep into those thin lace panties. “Mr. Jaeger…” crying out so sweetly that it made his cock twitch in those slacks. Hastily pulling it out as he smirked against your lips. “Please, call me Eren, baby. We’re past the formalities, aren’t we?” And that much was apparent by the way he propped your leg on his shoulder and looked into your eyes as he finally slid inside of you and began thrusting up into you. Feeding you deep, long strokes without so much as a second of breaking eye contact. Your head fell back for a second and he secured it with a hand to the back of your neck. Moaning and whimpering but trying to remain quiet because you’d be fired on the spot if caught. “Eyes on me, sweetheart. Look at me while I fuck you..” spoken like a man who knew exactly how to handle a girl like you. Giving you the best dick you’ve had in ages and possibly ever!.. “you’re so tight..fuck.” Grunting as he buries his face into the crook of your neck. Leaving soft kisses along the curvature of it. You’d claw your freshly done nails into the flesh of his exposed shoulder blades; right over those tattoos he got done when he was younger. Begging him not to stop as he pounds your pussy relentlessly.
“Right there! Oh shit..” only retracting long enough to spin you around and hit you from behind. Leaving smacks on that big, plump ass that rippled with each stroke. How simple, innocent conversations about knitting and TV shows had turned into this juicy little love affair so quickly…you guys would never know. It could be attributed to the subtle flirtation or the bubbling sexual tension that could no longer be ignored by either party. Regardless, the two of you were knee (or balls) deep rather into this illustrious rendezvous. From the counter top to the coffee table where he fed you collapsed backshots. The whole thing went on until you both reached your peaks. “C’mere, baby. On your knees” ushering you to your feet so that he could paint that pretty face and tongue with his nut. To which he’d kiss you afterwards..
needless to say, he was quite smitten with you after that day. Even having flowers delivered to your desk before you arrived for your shift. Rather than communicating via company lines, you exchanged phone numbers and started texting. Where he phoned you up and invited you out to a nice dinner. Underneath candlelight at the finest Italian restaurant in town. He was a complete and total gentleman, who made that week one of the most memorable you’ve ever had.
something told you it wouldn’t be the last you’d see of the smooth talking salesman
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keepyourpantsongohan · 2 months
Text
Ayesha Liveblogs Spy x Family S1
"Proof that the foreign minister wears a toupée. I even have the negatives." "Well done. Now we can force him to resign." How could this possibly be enough to force a resignation? Is wearing a toupée a sign of dishonesty or shame in this cultural context??
"In an era in which the nations of the world were waging a fierce war of information just out of sight, this man survived the battlefield by being a master of disguise." Ooooh is this a historical anime? How fun!
Update from 1 minute later: The newspaper confirms this as a Cold War-era story!! Colour me intrigued
"Farewell. May you find happiness." What a polite end to such a callous breakup LMAO
Why does Donovan Desmond look so incredibly haunted LOL
"In order to achieve this [spy mission] you will get married and have a child." Ah, there we are with the premise!
Of all the spy strengths they've displayed thus far, I am most impressed with this blond man's ability to pull a newspaper apart without bending it. You must need to generate a lot of force:
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"Yeah, sure. Take whichever one you want." This is about the average regard for orphans in Shonen Anime Societies
"This little girl happened to be a telepath." She's a WHAT NOW? What a casual way to introduce this fact
Honestly the random facts about what Anya likes and the bursting into tears with unclear motivation seems very much a realistic parent and child experience
"I just don't understand this irrational behaviour." I love how quickly Loid Forger aka Twilight, International Spy, has been foiled by this tiny, psychic child
Loid is approaching parenthood very casually so far. Surely a spy (pretending to be a psychologist, even) can recognize the psychological impact of abandonment on a child
Fjlkjfljflf what kind of society allows Loid to barricade his six (or maybe four) year-old child inside their apartment unsupervised all day LMAOOO
SCREAM not Anya immediately revealing their location from playing spy games. Also a very realistic problem to have
"Boss, I think we should just give up on the toupée." [Pulls out a gun and shoots him] "Transparency is essential in government. Toupées are a no-go." WHY ON EARTH ARE TOUPÉES THE ULTIMATE SPY PLOT DEVICE JFKJFJF
Love that the betrayal of the nation is SECOND to the toupée. They said: Wigs are for liars and cowards
"No one reached out their hand to save me. I felt alone, in despair, and so powerless all I could do was cry." We have unlocked Loid's parental instincts AND his tragic backstory in the span of 1 and a half minutes
"I'm a failure as a spy? No. My mistake was putting that little girl in danger to begin with. How could I forget? To create a world where children won't have to cry... That's why I became a spy." Alright Loid, colour me charmed:
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Ahhhhhh I love Loid giving his enemy the chance to go back to his daughter instead of attacking him
Loid deciding to take Anya back with him despite all his misgivings bc he wants to give her a home 🥺💘 HE'S NICE
"Papa is a huge liar. But he's such a cool liar." Awww, Anya
I can see how being psychic and being able to hear every single child's confusion during a test would be distracting
"I... relaxed? What the hell is going on with me?" FATHERHOOD
"It is mandatory that the applicant attend with both parents. Absolutely no exceptions." For a society with such a cavalier approach to violence and orphans (at least where Loid goes), you'd think they'd be more accepting of single parents
Everyone's absolutely on Yor's ass for being a single 27-year-old. [Yor as Charlotte Lucas voice] I'm 27 years old. I have no money and no prospects. I'm already a burden to my brother—
"I have a client for you, Thorn Princess." Is Thorn Princess Yor's sleeper agent activation phrase? Her whole face darkened
Clearly Yor doesn't have the same violence-aversion as Loid:
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Yor ready to fall in love with anyone who's nice to her. Mgkjgkg but same perhaps
"A spy...An assassin...? I'm... so excited!" [Narrator voiceover] "The little girl was straving for entertainment." The narrator's interjections are very funny
HAHAHAHA I love that they're both trying to fake date each other for very different reasons. Incredible, 10/10, love this
It's fun that Franky, spy gadget guy, is also now mission back-up
Also I take back everything I said about Loid's violence aversion
"I'll be sure to tell your brother that you came alone." Why is every woman that Yor works with (and, it seems, every woman with more than one line in this show thus far) seem to be so mean-spirited LOL
HFHLKHGLHGLGH Loid showing up to the party covered in blood and introducing himself as her husband when she needed a boyfriend. We love a spy who is terrible at his job
Loid managing to somehow make a really amazing impression on this party by being hot and defending Yor's past as a masseuse (murderer). GOOD FOR HIM
"The concussive recovery method is the latest in modern medical practices." Imagine going to your doctor for a prescription and having them kickbox you into submission LMAO
"Um, Loid-san, this may not be the best moment to ask, but why don't we get married?" SCREAMING AT YOR BEING THE ONE TO PROPOSE AND HOW KNOCKS THE WIND OUT OF LOID:
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"No matter what hardships await us, let us be there for one another." [Explosions go off in the background] Colour me sold on this grenade-pin ring and spy-assassin romance
I love that they're going on a little family outing to prep for their interview
I can also understand how a political rally would be stressful for Anya
"I've completed countless missions, yet once again I find myself losing heart." Loid will eventually get used to his girls who are obssessed with nuts and knives 💞
All of them calling attention to themselves by helping an old lady deal with a purse snatcher ❣️ I love this family. I've only had the Forgers for two episodes but if anything happened to them I would [redact] everyone in this room and then myself
"I guess... receiving thanks every once in a while wouldn't hurt." "Papa is a softie." YEAH HE IS
"Papa and Mama are flirting." "No we are not!" HEE HEE
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"Anya, are you going to be okay in this crowd?" Dad Mode Activated
Ohhhhhhh Anya helping the cow through her fear. Baby!!!!
OHGHGLGHLKGH setting aside how they managed to have at least three outfits in that suitcase, I really want to know how the quick change is happening in the middle of this cobblestone pathway to the school
"Why are you getting irritated, Loid? She's not even your real wife." I love that whenever someone makes an out-of-pocket insult to Yor (her coworker calling her a whore, this dorm master critiquing her lack of cooking) Loid jumps in and he's like, HEY, THAT'S MY WIFE
"My Papa and Mama are both so much fun, and I love them very much. I want to be with them forever." I also want this family to stay together forever, Anya 💗
Both Yor and Loid ready to fight this jerk for making their daughter cry!! I love them
The hope that Loid has because of his new family. This is really fulfilling a deepseated psychological need that I had to watch an anime that's just about a nice man
"He might just be the best spy in Westalis, so don't worry too much." With all due respect, that doesn't say much for the other spies, considering how suspiciously Loid acts everywhere he goes
Yor genuinely considering murdering someone to get her daughter into school 💝 Parenting!
"I appreciate the attempt at consolation, my elegant boy." This is how I will be responding to all attempts for someone to comfort me from now on
Loid just carrying a party popper around in his pocket for when Anya gets in. I LOVE HEEEM
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Loid can waste government resources on a little play mission for his family. As a treat
"He's requesting agents. As many as possible," incredible how Loid immediately folds to his daughter's request to be attacked by enemies LMAOOO
HAHAHAHA Loid telling them in morse code it's an imperative part of Operation Strix, which is technically true, but not at all for any reason they would think
The way they're all like, "I will JUMP at the chance to attack Loid, been waiting my whole life for this," is also really fun
I was waiting for the spy costume. I am so glad it is a plot point
I can't decide what I enjoy more, Loid's blush over having to put on the costume mask, or the way the other spies are fangirling over him
Loid getting his butt kicked by Yor in this drunk roleplay does make me wonder if we're going to see that her assassination missions run contrary to his goals of peacekeeping
"I've come to save you, Princess Anya." "Papa!" "Wait, I'm supposed to be your dad in this?" AWWWW ANYA JUST WANTED TO HER DAD TO ACT OUT SAVING HER
In fairness to Anya's fear of kidnapping, she has been kidnapped before!
"Though, you're usually on the ball, so [discussing Operation Strix Phase 2] may not be necessary." "Well... I may actually be off my game lately." At least Loid's willing to own up to it LMAOOO
Firstly, what happened just now was definitely an attempted [redacted] crime, which is hideously uncalled for, what the fuck. But secondly: I love Yor and Anya bonding time
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"I know it's really dangerous to be an Eden student now. But it won't be as scary if I train. I can do my best at school without dying!" I do love the idea of teaching this tiny child fighting techniques, but my god, what a thing to say
"Even if I can't be like a normal mother, I'm going to do everything I can for her." YOOOOOOOOOOOOR I love you
"She's already realized how amazing I am and fallen for me." Incredible confidence from Damian Desmond, Very Rich Six-Year-Old LMAO
"Mama, you liar. Smiling didn't help at all." I am very entertained by Anya's psychic child conflict management
Ffjhfkhfk I really do love the way that Anya tries her best to do things in a way that her parents would most approve of. Smiling first, trying to not get in trouble in front of the teacher when she punches Damian, claiming defence of a friend. She's a good kid!
What will Loid, who is not actually a psychologist, be doing during the day while Anya goes to school and his wife does her work. I hope it involves costumes
Update from 1 minute later: At the very least, it involves stalking elementary students from a rooftop
Update from 4 minutes later: IT DID INVOLVE COSTUMES!
Also. Also. How the hell would Loid's plan work if his daughter was NOT psychic. Like yeah yeah yeah, she knows she's supposed to be a good student. But it doesn't seem like he's explicitly told her out loud to be friends with Damian. So is he just hoping for her organic success? It's a good thing his baby knows exactly what he's thinking LMAO
I love that Becky has decided to be Anya's no. 1 supporter. She needs a friend!!
"Why do I find it so hard to speak when she's in front of me?" In a very expected turn of events, lil Damian has a crush:
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"Plan B is done for." You are wrong Loid! Plan Befriend has simply turned to Plan Boy Has a Crush on Your Daughter
This at-home tutoring really resonates with my experience of being the child of Asian parents with high expectations when it comes to their children's innate talent for math
"No, Yor. You're not a stranger, nor part of someone else's family. Right now, you're the mother of the Forgers. I'm counting on you to provide whatever I'm lacking." AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I love the Forgers
I loveeee this parenting discussion around positive reinforcement
"I wonder what it'd feel like to have a real family," said Loid, tits deep in a family and fatherhood
"My sister got married?" I was waiting for this ball to drop. Can't wait!
NOT BABY BROTHER YURI BEING EMPLOYED BY THE TORTURE DEPARTMENT OF THE GOVERNMENT OMG
"[Twilight] is the villain who is trying to make this world fall into chaos. You could call him my natural enemy." NOT BABY BROTHER YURI ANNOUNCING HIS INTENTIONS TO MERC HIS BROTHER-IN-LAW WHO HE'S ABOUT TO MEET AT DINNER:
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I gotta say, despite them introing with assassinations, I do feel like Yuri represents a drastic tone shift for this show
"Yuri... I mean, my younger brother is coming here today! [Loid's voice raises several octaves] "Today?" The voice crack was funny. Back to family shenanigans
As a sister. I AM SICK OF THE SISTER COMPLEX JOKES. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, BABY BROTHER YURI, ANIME AS A GENRE, AND WHATEVER JAPANESE SOCIETAL NORM THAT ALLOWS THIS TO BE A CONSTANT IN SO MANY DIFFERENT STORIES?
"What could my sister possibly like about this guy?! Just because he can cook a little, and he's handsome, and tall, and considerate, and a doctor," It sounds like Yuri is talking himself into having a crush on Loid????
Wow, Loid has made Yuri as an intelligence agent within like, mere minutes of meeting him. Maybe Loid is a great spy!
Ahhhh, so the reason Yor took up killing as a job was to put her little brother through school. How honourable!
"Kiss here and now." I can't decide if this is terrible or fun. Maybe both. My money is on Anya interrupting to see her Uncle
I do appreciate that Yor has never been kissed! It makes sense, given her murder job, and I feel like we don't often get 20somethings without prior entanglements
HDJHDKJDHDHD this is so unhinged and weird. Jesus. Yuri Briar puts the B in Behnchod
"Loid Forger. You may lay claim to my sister's lips for now." WHAT A THING TO SAY
"So, let's do everything we can to make sure Yor is happy." Loid is THE Husband. There are no other husbands, just him!
"Children are so curiously observant at times," said Loid, about his daughter who is literally telepathic
"It's a terrible idea to date a woman while deceiving her," said Loid, as if that has not been the premise of his ENTIRE romantic history thus far
I think Loid is starting to develop (romantic) feelings:
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You know, I haven't really commented on the horn cap thing, but I do wonder if they are to do with Anya's powers rather than just a fun little design thing
I need you to see what I'm looking at when they tell me this is Bill Watkins, Age Six:
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I do like all the montages of how all of these children (and Bill Watkins, Deeply Suspicious Age Six) were preparing for this dodgeball tournament
SCREAM THE CUT TO THE DRAGON BALL Z NAMEK BACKGROUND
Damian taking the dodgeball bullet for Anya. Love u little guy
Calling it right now, with all this lead-up, I don't think Anya's throw is going to work out the way she wants
Update from a few seconds later: Yep, that was correct!
Gnjghkgjhgkjhg Loid loves Anya too much to be strict with her so he is engaging in quite a permissive parenting style
ANYA TRYING TO SAVE THE LITTLE BOY FROM DROWNING WHEN SHE'S JUST A LITTLE GIRL HERSELF. SWEETEST BABY ALIVE
DAD'S HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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ANYA EARNING HER FIRST STELLA! YEAH BABYGIRL
I like how they do a count of her Stellas (merit points which lead to the Imperial Scholar Society of Parent War Instigation) and Tonitrus Bolts (demerit points which lead to expulsion) whenever Anya gets closer to her goal
Also, bonkers that getting a Stella doesn't cancel out your Bolt? It's like, forgive, but never forget
Fhkhfkjfhfkjh Anya deciding she'll only respond to Starlight Anya. Very Six-Year-Old Behaviour
"Do you really think we go to some third-rate school that would hand out a Stella by mistake?" Damian continuing his chivalry streak
1) Extremely rude of the people to treat the dogs that way and 2) Does that big white dog's flash to the Forger family mean that we have unlocked a psychic puppy subplot?
I have been thinking since Damian was introduced that he and Anya are paralleling the Syaroan and Sakura Archetypes, but there is no greater Cardcaptor Sakura parallel than the fact this episode is called Penguin Park
"Please wait, Papa, who is a good and normal person." 10/10 spy deception Anya, no notes
Gghkhgkghkg Loid being yelled at by his Spy Juice Lady for not prioritizing this other mission. How does no one overhear this!!
"Mama, I'm being kidnapped," said Anya, as if she did not latch onto this spy herself to help out her dad's Penguin Mission
It's incredible how many of Loid's problems are solved just by him being hot:
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Awwwwww I'm glad they did some actual family time after the Aquarium mission. Also I love how embarrassed Loid is every time has to do something silly, like pretending to be a Penguin Plushy for his kid, but how he'll immediately do it, even in public. Best dad!!
"Being both a Papa and an agent... must be tough balancing the two." Real and true, spy chauffeur
I love how they do parallel plots between family stuff and spy stuff. Anya looking for a puppy... Dad looking for bomb dogs!
They are in fact explaining the psychic puppy subplot
"It is far too early for Anya-san to get married!" Yor, I would like to study the way your mind works (also mom's here!!!!!!!!!!!!)
UHHHHHHHHHHHHHH EXTREMELY TRAUMATIZING FOR ANYA TO HAVE TO WATCH HER DAD'S IMMINENT DEATH BY EXPLOSION THROUGH DOG-O-VISION
That was an incredibly morose diatribe from The Handler, who is the only spy other than Loid to get a title/name
How is this baby supposed to disarm a bomb?!?!?!??
Ahhhh, by leaving a ketchup message for her dad on the door that says "NO! (Drawing of Bomb)" Of course! We love a girl who knows how to improvise
Dad has got back in the danger zone to stop the last of the Foreign Affairs Minister's terrorist threats, fair enough! I really hope they don't make him [redacted violence involving animal]
OH THANK GOD THEY HAD HIM ATTACK THE VEST AND NOT THE DOG—I WAS PRETTY CONFIDENT THEY WOULDN'T DO THAT TO LOID, BUT YOU NEVER KNOW WITH ANIME
From Yor's perspective, Loid has been in the bathroom for two full episodes
Yor kicking Keith the Radicalized Student Terrorist's car off the road after he has been discovered by Anya and foiled by Loid. We love a team effort!
"How many times must I tell you not to run off alone because it's dangerous?!" [Tearfully] "I'm sowwy." Awwww a very reasonable worry for your daughter who keeps running into every spy mission she possibly can
"I also had a daughter about her age." The Handler's tragic backstory unlocked?!
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"Be prepared to take care of him until the end. I may have no right to say those words." Loid's dog care advice has accidentally turned into existential dread about adopting a child for the sake of a peacekeeping mission
Awwwwwww Yor taking cooking classes from her workplace enemy to be a better cook for her family
"Camilla-san has always been a nice person," said Yor, about the woman who called her a whore in front of a room full of people and tried to scald her with hot food on like Episode 2
"The more I savour each bite, the more I see my life flash before my eyes." Say what you will about Weird Brother Yuri, he is supportive
Admittedly this cooking lesson episode has made me like Camilla
HAHAHAHA the "They are whispering" caption so the viewer can understand why no one's reacting to the yelling about spy intel on Scruffy's potential lover
Awwwwwww Loid opting out of the family outing to comfort his little scruffy friend, who I have just re-learned is named Franky
LMAOOOOO at them just having Henderson-sensei do literally all of the classes. Top-tier writing
The Handler now has unlocked TWO new names, which are Sylvia Sherwood and Fullmetal Lady
"On the one day each month that Mister Moon goes away, Anya's power to read minds goes away too." Oooooh new psychic baby lore unlocked
Even though I don't care for Weird Brother Yuri, it is nice that Anya has someone outside of her parents to rely on for tutoring
Loid covering for Incompetent Spy Daybreak jkhfkhfkjhf
I love that Loid broke into the school, not to boost his daughter's grades, but rather to check that she didn't fail and leave it that way, and then reverse cheat (as in, undo someone's wrongdoing) to make sure two other students got their earned grades. What a man!
Ffljlfjjflkj Becky objectifying Anya's dad. I know they're six, but it's not a trope I love
"I was trying to report the cigarette I found, then he punched me." I know this is a scheme but what kind of society has SIX-YEAR-OLDS plausibly smoking???
"Second Son wouldn't do that! Anya was watching." Heck yeah Anya standing up for Damian (even though her Damian motives are decidedly ulterior LOL)
"Don't try to drag me into these adult matters in the first place!" An incredibly reasonable request from Damian
Gdljljggjglkj I love these kids telling Glooman 'Actually, the biggest problem is you have a bad personality' True and real and cutting
"Don't worry. The West is a safe place." ANYAAAA. Something something children and their ability to see people outside of the confines of politics
"There's saltwater pouring out of my eyes." The implication that George has not cried once in his six years of life LMAOOOO
Genuinely heartwarming to see all these kids singing for George and giving away their favourite school items for his sake (also I bet you $5 he doesn't actually have to quit this school)
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Update from two minutes later: I was correct lol
I've been thinking about this since the hospital volunteering, but it is kind of a flaw in Loid's spy tactics to choose a public-facing job, because at any point someone could just walk into the hospital and realize he doesn't work there kjhgkjhgg like he should've just been some sort of private practice
Loid running home to "check on what Yor was doing at the school" but actually using it as an excuse to ask her on a lunch date <3
As if the show could psychically tell that I was wondering about it, they are now forcing Loid into a "Take Your Kid to Work Day" situation lmaooo
"[Loid] became an important part of our team as soon as he transferred in." How is Loid an important part of the staff if he's constantly out of hospital doing spy stuff??? How is he even capable of giving psychological care???
"To go with the rest of the facade, a number of my coworkers have also inflitrated this hospital." Ah, perhaps the fact he has a research position and other spies in the hospital is enough to cover his absences and maybe make him have fake patients
Honestly, it's a wonder Anya hasn't run into more problems in the spy realm recently other than getting stuck in a secret passage
HHGKJHGKJHGKJGH Loid taking Anya's improvised sandbox of toys as a sign of deep psychological distress
"He golfs at his workplace and creates shady channels." In every class there is one child who has the most chaotic possible interpretation of their parents' job (the kid who says their parent stabs people for money when really their parent is a tattoo artist) and Anya has decided to be that student
"But if Mrs. Forger just happened to retire, that position would have to be filled, would it not?" Why is Fiona so comically evil about getting to fake marry Loid
"But... this woman doesn't seem to have any flaws in her appearance." Even Father-snatcher Fiona Frost thinks Yor is hot
"To think the great Twilight is stuck playing house.. It's a disservice to the world." Loid said: Fuck you Fiona, I like playing house!
This silent spy standoff has certainly taken a turn:
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I actually kind of love that Loid is faced with someone else who has feelings for him, because I KNOW for certain he will choose Yor, and I think that's good for Yor to see
"You're already working hard enough, Yor. That's why Anya is so fond of you. I couldn't ask you to do anything more." HE LOVES HERRRRR
I really resonate with Yor's Girls Who Are Bad At Stuff representation kjhgkgjh
"Agent Penguin suffered honourable injuries in battle." Loid sewing up his daughter's penguin stuffy and making up a backstory for their dog chewing him up ❤️ I love hiiiim
I appreciate that Fiona confirms from someone who knew him before Loid has been changed by love (for Yor and Anya)
NOT THE DOUBLE FAKE TENNIS COUPLE NAMES BEING TWAIN AND NAFALIA PHONY
Though, now that I think of it, I guess Loid's given last name is Forger, so really this is a pattern of very silly names
"We've been developing a new doping agent called OSO-R along with the government in preparation for the upcoming East-West Sports Exhibition." Every so often they dip back into the crime world, and today it's sports doping
"I wonder what her relationship with Loid is." Yor babygirl, you do not need to worry about her, Loid is fully Team Yor
I love this little look into all the different things that come up in an infiltration (having to be very good at specific things like tennis, dealing with potential poisons, compensating for traps)
"You're still young, and you're clearly talented. From now on, hone your craft properly. I'm sure you'll become an amazing player." "Twain, I'll really do my best from now on!" Aside from being an incredible professional tennis player, Loid's talents also include reforming his opponents into better people:
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Fhfhfkjhfkfjhf Loid every time Fiona comes near Yor: Hey, please leave my wife alone
"Come at me with everything you've got." "Uh, don't, Fiona." Loid knows Yor has enough physical might to beat a hundred tennis players
Yor wanting Loid to praise her for winning the match 🥺❤️
Loid taking Yor on a reassurance date to let her know she's still #1
"Wait, does Yor have romantic feelings for me?!" TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH, BUT YOU GOT THERE, LOID
NOT LOID IMMEDIATELY SWITCHING TO PLAN HONEY TRAP AND YOR ACCIDENTALLY KICKING SOME SENSE TO HIM
"I can't let my guard down like that. Somehow, being with Yor throws me off." Loid, you stupid man, who can't see that him AND his wife have feelings for each other
"I would love for you to continue being Anya's mother. And to continue in the role of my wife." This is the most honest thing Loid has said in hours
Anya getting Becky a keychain because she didn't think she was allowed to get one for herself!! Sweet girl
What kind of father has ZERO time to interact with his son LMAO (Donovan Desmond, apparently)
"Anya's a little scared because she's not sure if Papa loves her or not. He always gets mad at me. But I believe in him because I love him." ANYAAAAAAAAAA
Papa Desmond and his truly haunting eyes finally make an on-screen appearance and meeting with Loid:
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"Even the child that shares your blood is a stranger." Is this a general view from Donovan on his parent-child relationships or is this a shot at Loid for not being Anya's biological father?
"People will never be able to understand each other." What a thing to say about your six-year-old, who is standing right in front of you with his friends
"What's truly important is to continue walking them despite [not understanding each other]. I decided that I would accept her regardless, and I try to find every opportunity I can to talk to her." Loid laying spy ground work on top of challenging Donovan to be a better father. We love a man who can multitask
"I'm pretty sure she doesn't actually dislike you. It'd make me happy if you could be friends with her." "Well, I want to, too..." Gjhgjhgjhfjlfj Loid is also working on Operation Playdate
This has been a pretty delightful show so far. Spy x Family proving to everyone you can fight people AND be nice!!!!
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hanniluvi · 11 months
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💭 — HEESEUNG AS YOUR BOYFRIEND !
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tysm for requesting seol pookie 😊🫶 here to fulfill ur deluluness <3
warnings : mentions of pet names, mentions of kissing
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— he definitely loves kissing your hands. like he could be playing around with your hands and suddenly he just kisses your knuckles.
— loves, i mean it, loves it when you sit on his lap. like he would literally drag you to his lap, whether at home or in public. he just likes wrapping his arms around your waist and having you close. screaming
— you can’t tell me he wouldn’t be a jealous type 😭 like he’s jealous and think hes sooo good at hiding it… (hes not good at it whatsoever) like he probably would side-eye anyone who he thinks is being too touchy w/ you… probably pulls that “boyfriend card” and be like, “are you ready to go, babe?” or suddenly kisses you on the cheek to let the other person know you’re off limits … LIKE SHUT UP
— def uses baby/babe…probably uses princess to tease you
— adding onto the teasing part, he would says “oh really?” with a smirk when teasing you just to make you more flustered
— “yeah i think you look great—” “oh really? how so?” “if you don’t shut your mouth.” LMAOOO
— i think he’s a very attentive boyfriend, like he would remember all these little details. so like when he does smth sweet and you ask him why, he simply just goes “because you like it” or “i remember you saying you like this”
— sings for you just because. like if you ask him to sing you to sleep, he’d do it for you everyday and every night
— obviously in love with you. like anyone can spot the heart eyes he gives to you only. and because of this, he gets teased by the others a lot and comes to you for help 😭
— finds you cute for literally no reason. like sir chill out you do not need to be saying cute every minute?? and when he does, he would js walk to you and ruffle your hair or just give you head pats … uh yeah i need a heeseung
— i think he prefers calling over texting just so he could think about your voice / face after the call ends. let’s say, it just makes him fall for you even more <3
— not a spam texter, def sends like 1-2 texts at a time, but flirty ones. and when you give back the same vibe/tone and send similar texts as his, he’s already giggling. yeah, you do that to him.
— def enjoys listening to you talk. if it was possible, he’d just be wanting to hear you talk 24/7. even jokes about how you should create a podcast just for him.
— tells you jokes all the time just for you to laugh at him
— loves kissing you okay …. like you + his lips always. kissing you when you’re out, a quick peck before he leaves the house, smothering you with kisses when it’s time to sleep, just every day, he would kiss you sooo much.
— out of habit, he would always get a second bowl of food just for you. ramen? you don’t even have to ask, he’s already cooking two packs. he just automatically grabs two bowls but serves you first. “do you want this?”
— loves teaching you things he knows how to do. like he would praise you sm after and look at you so lovingly as you attempt it. “you’re doing great!” , “woah you’re better than me!”
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💭 — how delulu are you after reading this
ENHA PERM TAGLIST — @flwoie @ixomiyu @yenavrse @shinsou-rii @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @yenqa @dimplewonie @bubblytaetae @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @starcubes @starikizs @wonioml @chirokookie @xiaoderrrr @neozon3nha @en-chantedtomeetyou @millksea @enhaz1 @eundiarys @woon2u @ja4hyvn @judeduartewannabe @j-wyoung @thia-aep @vampcharxter @softpia @officiallyjaehyuns @itsactuallylina @hsheart @sweetjaemss @ahnneyong @hanienie @jwnghyuns @kpoplover718 @jiawji @rikizm @haknom @yeokii @wvnkoi @tnyhees @teddywonss @shinunoga-iie-wa @flwrshee
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multifandomslxt · 10 months
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NCT 127 and their sugar daddy ratings PT.1
part two coming soon as well as a svt and skz version
Johnny Suh
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9.5/10 ( less .5 because he refuses to use the title of sugar daddy, instead he prefers "sponsor".)
He's a CEO. No questions about it.
The man is Fucking RICH
You met through a mutual friend
talked a bit and you ended up telling him that
you were currently taking a year off because of a financial bind
Lies to you and tells you he sponsors college students sometimes
and that he would like to sponsor you
Of course you immediately accept the offer
so begins the sugar daddy antics
Would spoil you,
And I do mean
SPOIL YOU!
The song 'Sexy' by JoeVille
"you can do anything you want when you sexy"
Is something he literally lives by
you can do no fucking wrong in his eyes
you're his princess
went on a business trip once and came back to tell you
he bought you a whole penthouse apartment
just in case you wanted to "Study abroad"
buys you EVERYTHING you could ever want
demands you call him "Mr. Suh"
in your eyes its because he wants respect
in his eyes its the closest thing to 'daddy'.
Forbids you from getting a part-time job because
"I can take care of you. Let me take care of you I'm your sponsor after all."
Buys you an expensive necklace for your graduation present.
Then finally reveals that the whole sponsor thing was just him spending his personal money on you.
and so begins the sugar baby-to-girlfriend pipeline.
treats you the same except
now yall are having sex 6/7 days of the week.
Jung Jaehyun
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10/10 (bitch he's perfecttttttt)
Another CEO
He ain't rich like Johnny though
This bitch right here?
he is ✨ WEALTHY✨
LOVESSSSSSS TO SPEND HIS MONEY
You met while you were at work
Everybody knew him
and you were the waitress in charge of his table
First thing you realized about this man
he doesn't speak to many people
Someone literally ordered for him
anyways
imagine your shock when you're about to clock out and your
co-worker tells you "Y/n, Mr. Jung would like to have a word with you. He says to bring your stuff with you"
His security leads you to his car and you step in
Jaehyun is literally staring at you the minute you sit in the car
"I'll be straight to the point, I have a meeting to get to in the next 10 minutes. I want you."
Cue the shocked look and silence
However, y'all start to date.
yes, he's your boyfriend and your sugar daddy
as I said, he enjoys spending his money
but only on very specific people.
takes you all over the fucking world you hear me???
Paris has seen your face more than your local chick-fil-a
the type to buy you anything you look at
even if it was for a mili second
this explains how your closet is now overflowing with designer dresses
also, you're a curvy queen
listen closely
HE WILL BE BUYING YOU EVERY DESIGNER BODY CON DRESS TO EVER EXIST!
this is his fav so simple yet so effective (he's convinced you're trying to k!ll him)
that dress got you a fucking range rover babeee
and it also got you a few days of sick leave from the "unnecessary job" as Jaehyun likes to call it.
completely reaaranged your guts lmaoo
And the lingerie??
its tradition he buys you 10-15 sets every Friday
"Y'know daddy'll give you the world right?"
Lee Taeyong
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9/10 (he was awkward at first lmaoo)
First off you don't know what he does
but the bitch got MONEYYYYYYYYYY
You met on a sugar baby app
you were just trynna make ends meet
he was just trynna get rid of the extra money he got
his first text to you seemed so damn auto mated lmaooo
"hello, I'm Taeyong! Would you like to continue this conversation?"
you were like "???"
but yk eventually yall kicked it off
gave you his card pin after your third date
"Anything you want Daddy will buy it for you okay?"
omfg
the type to set up an account for you just for your hair and nails
fucckkkkkkk
he even sends you what he wants you to get.
Just so yk
Them Fulani braids
will send him in a coma
he loves frenchies too
so expect alooottt of special requests
he expects to see your personal purchases on his bank statements
don't play with him.
got his bank statement once and dint see your daily coffee purchase
fucked you into oblivion just for that.
he pays your rent
and is also planning on buying you 2 cars for your birthday
one for everyday use
and the other for special occasions lmaoooo
"Just let Daddy take care of you okay?"
Nakamoto Yuta
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11/10 (Bitch...it's literally Yuta)
You also don't know what he does
but as usual, he got money
somehow WEALTHIER than Jaehyun
Yall met through a sugar baby app
he was experimenting
and you were new to this
has a specific amount of money he must depend on you at the end of every month
over 200k
I said what I said
yes you are his sugar baby but he was very clear
when he told you that he is also the MAN in your life
ain't nobody supposed to have access to that pu$$y except him and you
got that??
s3x with him is surprisingly rare btw
he's wayyy too busy to be around you 24/7
hence the over the top 200k budget
always has eyes on you even when he isn't there
you went grocery shopping n the wrong side of town once
and he called you the minute you got home
"What did I tell you about putting yourself in danger princess? do you want me to come home early and teach you a lesson?"
probably the most possessive out of all of them
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antonsgf · 4 months
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˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ bf!anton pt. 2 ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
bye this is so long overdue oops !! part one is here !!
bf!anton likes to send you little texts throughout the day just to update you on what he's doing while on schedules and he most definitely miss you :(
he would also send tik toks and .5 pics of his hyungs just for funisies and you should send some back !!!
speaking of tik toks, yall would spend hours creating some !! your drafts are filled with 100s of silly little videos
especially trendy couple vids like this one :))
bf!anton would definitely bring you around to hang out with his hyungs and of course they would tease him !!
but don't worry because you would definitely defend your man if needed be !!
like imagine one night yall are having a group movie night and you're all snuggled up next to tonny and giving him a smooch on the cheek
next thing you know eunseok is like "ugh get a room :P"
without a beat your response would be like "damn bro i would be mad too if i didn't have someone kissing up on me like get a gf :P"
everyone is like ":O ohhhhhh shit!" "you finally met your match hyung :)" lmao you and eunseok would go toe to toe !!
you gets down and you dont play about your tonny !! it's all jokes though so no worries :))
aside from that anton would feel so much pride and happiness from the sight of you getting along with his hyungs esp sohee !! but like sohee was lowkey his wingman tho LMAOOO
tonny is an unconfirmed taurus venus, which in my delulu head means one of his favorite things to do with you is taking a nap or cuddling which leads to said naps !!
he just give top tier cuddler like !! his arms look so warm and welcoming adafklhfjhafjhd
imagine yall cuddling up all nice and peaceful !! you're wearing one of his t-shirts and he's holding you all warm and snug throughout the night against his chest ahhh !! i would simply just die right then and there fr !!
the next morning you wake up with his arms still around you and you're like stuck physically because his arms are locked in !!
it's always the same scenario of you two being like
"ant we gotta get up :3" "ahh just five more minutes baby :3"
his sleepy self would refuse to let go because being bed with you is like paradise !! and he doesn't want it to end...unless...
"i'll make your special yogurt parfait you like for breakfast :)"
he would relunctantly let you go but only because how could he turn down his special greek yogurt parfait that he is more than capable of making himself made by the love of his life ???
and it's not even all that !! you literally found a recipe on tiktok and made it for him one day !! now he texts you every now and then wishing you were around to make it !!
"babe it's literally four ingredients ??" "but it's not the same when you don't make it :(("
food would be another part of his love language because we all know how much our boy loves his snacks !!
and how could you deny your boyfriend from a treat that's handmade from you ?? like make it make sense ??
thanks for reading and waiting lmaooo !! might make make this a series but no promises !!
feel free to send me asks or let me know what yall think :3
♡ kimmia ♡
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leviathanspain · 1 year
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mi amor
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namor x avenger!reader
synopsis: after a long time running away from the one man who had promised you the world, you realize your fears have come to fruition
disclaimer: i have NOT seen the movie yet lmaooo i work all the time + i’m a cheap ass waiting for the pirated websites to upload the HD versions for the movie so bear with me if none of this is remotely accurate— based off of fics and clips i’ve seen
mi amor - my love
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you could hear the clamor of the fight. you had stayed back, the look of disappointment on shuri’s face when she tried to tug on you to help was like salt in your deep wound. you knew exactly who it was, having caught glimpses of their blue skin and their clothing, you felt the bile rise in your throat as panic surged your body.
had he truly found you again? after all this time?
you had spent the months after leaving, destroying every piece of your identity, faking your death, selling your belongings and erasing yourself from existence. for a time, it was easy. half the world had been snapped so half the people who once knew you, were gone.
but it didn’t make the struggle of it all any less. the avengers had dissolved, especially considering that half of your teammates were gone, you were left with one option, one that you weren’t really sure was reliable anymore.
wakanda had once let you call it home, and you hoped it would once again.
nakia’s voice was like music to your ears as the call had finally been picked up on the third ring.
your head fell into your hand with a sigh of relief, “nakia!” you nearly cried, “nakia, thank the gods..”
you heard a faint whisper of a man in the background before nakia responded with your name, “y/n? what’s wrong?”
your unloading of the situation took a mere five minutes, but nakia was already on her way with a jet to retrieve you in less than.
being back on wakanda was jarring. you had been here before, happy and accompanying bucky as he healed from hydra’s touch. and it was here, that you saw him for the very first time.
legends that your mother had told you never measured to his. he was pure magic, a mystical being that had you bowing on your knees.
he rose from the water as you felt the tears prick from your eyes. the darkness casted a shadow over his face, and it wasn’t until he was breathing your air, that you finally saw the beauty of him.
you felt the gasp of air leave your lungs, and instead, filled with the pounding water from down below.
you wanted to scream, feeling the burning of your lungs, you clawed at your throat, and even more at him, for his beauty was a facade for the evil that sat within him.
as he set a hand on your shoulder, intent on watching you die within his wrath, you gripped his hand, and let the fire of your pain burn through onto his skin.
he pulled back, hissing as he looked down at his injury. you collapsed at the same time, the water that made your lungs burn now emptied out on the ground, gasping for air you heaved.
“what..” you coughed, still gulping at the left over sea water, “the fuck?!” you yelled.
“i have the same question to ask you..” his voice was accented, a twinge of spanish just at the brink of his tongue you could almost hear it.
he looked down at his burn and smirked softly, “you are the fire they’ve warned about..”
you sent yourself back to reality.
“enough dwelling in the past..” you muttered. you mustered up your strength and stepped out onto the scene. it was less horrifying as you imagined, considering his style.
all the words fell immediately as you revealed yourself. shuri and ramonda both turned and the reveal of your betrayal played in their eyes.
“y/n.” his voice was like forbidden music to your ears. you turned your gaze away from them and faced him.
you regretted your decision to show, but you understood that this was partly your fault.
“k'uk'ulkan.” his name was like honey on your tongue, a sound to him that left him buzzing. you looked at him and wanted to beg the question, wanted to ask why he would go to such lengths to find you.
“don’t think that i didn’t know. i can feel you move amongst them, your heart is aligned with mine..” namor moved closer to you, “i felt them, their heartbeat, their energy..” namor whispered now, his words ever so enchanting.
you mustered up the courage and pushed him back roughly, the sound of sizzling flesh was heard just as his soldiers, stepped in front of him with weapons pointed at your neck.
you scoffed, “i was once considered your queen, your ruler and you my subjects, and you dare forget me so soon..” you stepped back, and ignored their faces as you stared at namor, “there is not a corner on this earth that you will leave unsearched, but there is the fact that you will never find him.” your words were like knives to his heart, and he seethed.
as you prepared to step back, run away as you have always done, the emotion that tugged at your heartstrings made you stop, and gaze him in the eye once more.
“how could you have done this to me, mi amor?” he was murmuring the words, and you looked back to see the wakandians glaring at you with betrayal, “i promised to give you the world,” he opened his arms and turned with a grimace, “even if the world is undeserving of your beauty, your power can change it, change them.” he glowered at the wakandians.
you shook your head, “how could i have stayed knowing your were walking the narrow line between justice and tyranny?” you echoed, “i made my decision, and i live with it everyday that he asks who his father is.” you sniffled, “it is now your turn to live with the consequences of your actions, mi amor.” the last words felt antagonizing, like salt to another deep wound.
the pain of walking away, knowing you had just given up another place you could’ve called home eventually, was tough. your son was with nakia, the only one entrusted with the information regarding his parentage, you had him blended into society, a child who lived in ignorance filled bliss.
you would give up your life, if it meant namor would never see him.
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