#look im tagging this so that i can find it once i inevitably start watching tfa

[acegoldenguard]

theres a part of me that really wants to try watching transformers animated because ive heard good things about it and some of the character designs look cool, but im very much hindered by the fact that optimus kinda looks like he’d call me a slur

#transformers #transformers animated #tfa #chatter #look im tagging this so that i can find it once i inevitably start watching tfa #but also to ask other peoples expert opinion: #is it worth it #i really cant explain my aversion to his design #just sets off all my alarm bells #anyway is the plot worth it. are the characters. should i sit through my instinctual recoil to watch what is probably a decent show

[a-world-of-whimsy-5]

can u pls write something w legolas PLS im so thirsty for him and i love ur writings🙏🙏🙏🙏

Even though requests are closed, I will indulge just this once. I also hope you don't mind a bite sized story for now.

"Stargazing"

🍃Pairing : Legolas x Fem. Reader (Elf / Second person POV)

🍃Themes : Soft | Fluff 

🍃 Warnings: kissing

🍃Word count: 700 plus words

🍃Summary: stargazing with Legolas ends up with an unexpected surprise.

Minors DNI | 18+

Want to be tagged? Want to know the rules? Read all here.

If you like this please give it a reblog.

It was a beautiful night. The stars were out in all their glory, sparkling like diamonds strewn over black velvet.

It was here, under the gnarled branches of an old oak tree, that Legolas found you, your back against the bark, your eyes fixed on the sky.

"Stargazing, meleth?"

You turned to him and smiled at him. "I am," you said, blushing like anything when he lay down on the soft grass and placed his head upon your lap. "It is a good night for it."

"It is," Legolas agreed, his hand reaching for yours. It had become a little ritual between the two of you since he started courting you many months ago. You would come out to watch the stars, and Legolas would come for you and lay down beside you, his head inevitably ending up on your lap. You loved it, this sweet little routine between the two of you, how the two of you could just lay there and forget all else. "But I think it is safe to say the view from where I am at is far sweeter right now."

He had been looking right at you when he said it. And how it made your cheeks warm to hear it. "Flatterer," you hummed sweetly when he brought your hand to his lips, and soft kisses trailed all over your fingers.

"It is not mere flattery, meleth. It is the truth," he said simply, his eyes never leaving yours.

You flushed even more, uncertain of what to say and unsure of how to still the frantic beat of your heart. His kisses, sweet and innocent as they were, roused something in you, something less than innocent and far more than merely sweet. It must have been there, in the hitch in your breath, for Legolas squeezed your hand and said, "Soon. I promise you."

Your very core tightened by what he said. Legolas looked up at you intently, not saying anything else. You looked at him, at his lips—lips that were meant to be kissed. They curled up, as if in invitation. On an impulse, you leaned down and kissed him. It was light and sweet; you had no intention of it going further than that, but when Legolas sat up, his arms holding you in a loose embrace, all sense of modesty crumbled and you found yourself kissing him with raw hunger and not the shy, timid kisses you gave him before. When your arms moved over his shoulders and your nails raked through his hair, Legolas kissed you deeply one last time before pulling away with a sigh.

For a brief, beautiful moment, the two of you stayed as you were, his forehead resting over yours. Nothing could be heard, save for the sound of your breathing and leaves rustling in the wind.

"Very soon," Legolas said, his voice suddenly rough. "But not now. Someone could find us, and I would much rather we be alone, with no one to see or hear us."

He was right. Someone could stumble upon the two of you, and that would not be good at all. In a private room with no one to see or hear, that was a much better prospect. But still-

"Nothing could compare to a star-filled sky," you said, somewhat disappointed.

Legolas smiled and kissed you again, softly this time. "I will take care of it, meleth, do not fret."

He lay back once more, his head comfortably on your lap. "Look, Meleth," he pointed at the sky. "A falling star."

You turned your gaze toward the heavens. That one falling star turned into two, and two swelled to dozens, and dozens turned into hundreds. Beautiful orbs of white light streaked across the sky, their tails burning radiantly behind them. You gasped, having never seen anything so breathtaking in your life.

"What do you think they mean?" you asked, stroking back his hair.

"When I was a child," Legolas said fondly, "Adar said they were a sign from the Valar, to show us we were not alone. They were a sign of hope, he said, and that better times lay ahead."

He turned his gaze back to you. "I take this as a sign for us, that our future together would be a bright and happy one."

Your smile was a mirror reflection of his. "Do you think we will have a bright and happy future together?"

"I do," Legolas vowed fiercely, for he intended to follow in the footsteps of his parents, who, despite the great tragedy of their parting, had a deep and loving union. "I will make sure of it."

tags: @nupppuff | @floraroselaughter

#Legolas #legolas imagine #legolas x reader #X reader #x reader insert #reader insert request #The hobbit #The hobbit x reader #lotr #lotr x reader #writeblr #💫a world of whimsy writes

[oswlld]

Eight (8) Shows to Get to Know Me

tagged by @talays-portkey ♥ ty for tagging me and having me walk down memory lane for the past few days (spent too much time in all the tags microdosing on my upbringing)

DISCLAIMER: i wanted to showcase defining eras in my life/made an impact in a substantial way; i’m also recommending an ep to watch with each one, which isn’t part of the tag format but imma do it

--

i. LOST (2004-2010)

this was my whole world for my entire hs existence and into my early college years. half of the shows listed here stems from my first love of the ensemble cast, their interwoven yet clandestine storylines, and the mystery box. at my first sdcc, half of the cast was present when they debuted p1 of the series finale (you’d think i was dead the whole time fksfsk;lv)

the jessi special: The Constant (04x05)

ii. Fringe (2008-2013)

yes, i faithfully followed jj abrams into another insane show. i think it actually altered my brain chemistry, rewired something in me, devoured a piece of me. once LOST was over and Fringe brought in the alternate universe, i dove in head first and never resurfaced

the jessi special: Making Angels (04x11)

iii. Doctor Who (2005-Present)

i think it was technically winter 2010 when i started binging this show because s6 was my first time catching it live (was young and naïve, i caught it on bbca lol) ive been on hellsite for almost two years at the time and fully became a fandom blog, so it was inevitable i would love this series. i think it was the first show i made gifs/edits for???

the jessi special: The Doctor’s Wife (06x04)

iv. Lizzie Bennet Diaries (2012-2013)

oh look, my dna makeup shifts again. i actually started watching this show the week leading up to Darcy Day and can still vividly remember the migraines from binging 8-10min eps times 60ish worth of content. this show got me into writing my first fic, running an rp blog, creating instrumental playlists, making a DWxLBD blog, AND eventually flying my ass back to CA to meet the cast and beloved mutuals at VidCon

the jessi special: A New Buddy (ep56)

v. Orphan Black (2013-2017)

happy international women’s day to this show and this show only! i think of all the shows listed here, this is the first time since LOST i caught all the eps in real time from the very beginning. this was filling the hole Fringe was about to carve deep in me. but if you cut me open, you will find the beth-shaped hole that nothing/no one has been able to fill and likely will never fill til the end of time

the jessi special: The Collapse of Nature (04x01)

vi. Shadowhunters (2016-2019)

im willing to admit that the reason i got into this show was because of the wedding kiss haha i saw the clip, signed the adoption papers on the spot, and went on to write a 100K+ wip series. admittedly, i confess that this was a DNF and never finished the last season... i abandoned my boy.gif

the jessi special: Of Men and Angels (01x06)

vii. Sense8 (2015-2018)

a show about eight children than i gave birth to, that i raised on my own, that i will defend on my death bed and beyond??? that show sense8?? yes that show sense8. fun fact, when they did the screening of the finale in Chicago, the cast ended up sitting three rows behind me in the theater and i could hear them talking in between scenes the entire evening. wish i could bottle that feeling up

the jessi special: I Have No Room in My Heart for Hate (02x07)

viii. Bad Buddy (2021-2022)

and we finally made it to the current decade! its nov 2021, im fresh off leaving my previous job and still getting situated in my new position, yet this show was a siren calling to me in the dark mist of my life. i ended up saving the binge watching for the week of my bday and my whole life shifted again. it must have been so alarming on the outside, seeing me go from making 1-2 edits a month to 1-2 edits a day for almost THREE MONTHS. the fact that i still cont to avg two edits/week since then... oy lol

the jessi special: Ep10 (shocked pikachu.jpg)

and ill also throw some honorable mentions too: Chuck, The Good Place, Vice Versa, Twenty Five Twenty One, Once Upon a Time, and Elementary

--

now tagging @pranink, @icouldhyperfixatehim, @noxclara, @curious-earth (no pressure tho!)

#tag meme #tagged #this is jessi #i am a tree and these are the most defined rings #the ones people would study and say 'tf happened in this era' #now i feel obligated to make an edit for fringe #its the only show of the eight listed that i have never made something for #made a few LOST edits maybe two remakes ago #theres still some LBD edits in the archive tag #now all the new mutuals since bad buddy ended know me on a molecular level

[prettyboykatsuki]

when you start writing for ushijima >>>>>>>>>>>>>

can you tell im begging?

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

inevitable | u. wakatoshi

➳ tags ;; fluff n smut, getting together, first times together, unprotected sex, intentional lower case 18+

➳ wc ;; 1.9k (WHAT THE FUCK)

➳ a/n ;; ask n u shall recieve (i had rlly bad brainrot tn actually)

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

if you had to describe ushijima wakatoshi in one word, you think the word you would chose is inevitable.

in·ev·i·ta·ble | /inˈevidəb(ə)l/ adjective certain to happen; unavoidable

of all the ways you could describe a person, it's probably not the best word. you could think of a laundry list of other ones to describe - really. hard-working, dependable, strong-willed, mindful, cautious. he's a lot of things and you think that's why he's so good at what he does. he's powerful but he he's brilliant at where he uses that power.

you would also use words like that to describe him, if you had too. if you had to give someone the run-down of wakatoshi - you could probably give them a whole speech about his accolades. he's probably the kindest person you know and he does that mostly on accident. he helps little old ladies carry groceries and lets your niece climb his arms like monkey bars with the most plain look on his face.

he's a lot of things - funny on accident, charming on purpose. but of all the things he is - to you, the thing he is most, is inevitable.

it's not hard for you to admit that you weren't exactly.. welcoming to ushijima when you first met him. you were a barista and he was well.. a big, pro-athlete who came to buy straight dark coffee every morning. after his work-outs (or what you figured was workouts since he always looked pretty sweaty) he bought himself precisely one pastry and a bottle of water and went about his day.

and it went like that for months. obviously you found him handsome - the way you could basically autopilot your shifts but completely broke down when he was there was evidence of that. he was tall, broad, handsome and nice. the kind of man who meets your grandmother, you think.

he always asked about you and you gave him short answers. too nervous to elaborate but he made you anyways, somehow and some way. and he comes back to you every week with details of your life you'd only mention in passing. he'd chuckle - a soft little smile at the way your eyes went wide. for someone so dense, he wasn't all that out of touch when it came to you. one morning your hands trembling just a little more than normal when you hand him back his change

(he tells you later he paid in cash just to see you stumble)

and he asks you with a plain look. observant.

"do i make you nervous?"

that's when you knew, really. you stood no chance against the all-consuming force that was and is ushijima wakatoshi. the subtlety and nuance in all of his actions left you worse for wear and any suspicions you had about how he might be treating you were to be confirmed much later down that line.

he's dense in the same way avocadoes are fruit. it's true, technically - but in a lot of ways and functionally it's just not the same. you think that the better word to use for him is selectively intelligent - like he doesn't bother thinking about anything that doesn't interest him for more than two minutes. but on the rare occasion it does interest him, i.e how you interest him - he becomes some kind of expert.

you've always been a little stubborn when it came to love. heartbreak does that to you - and you were overly cautious with ushijima. you let your heart walk on eggshells. you didn't let his gestures or touches or glances mean anything to you. you didn't let yourself be swayed by the smell of his cologne - sweet and woodsy on the back of your throat. not by the way he placed his hand on your lower back to walk past you on days off.

and when he took you out, to see the movies and stargaze, you told yourself it isn't a date. you tried your best really. because there is something really unbelievable about ushijima wakatoshi liking you - beyond the fact that he's some pro-athlete.

there's something about him that's a little unreal. not that he's perfect, but that all of his flaws make him more attractive. it almost bothers you but he doesn't seem to understand when you give him those lengthy explanations. hands making all types of gestures, flustered as he smiles. he doesn't take anything from your little lecture that day, just gives you a once over as he drives you home.

"oh, so you find me attractive?"

you didn't stand a chance. he was, and is, inevitable. everything about him has this powerful but subtlety all-consuming nature to him. you think the best way to think of it is like letting yourself float. the way you release the weigh in your body and inevitable give into letting it hold you. even if waves came - you'd probably stay in that state.

ushijima is like that. a constant presence and overwhelming force. you get swayed without even thinking. he could probably become president, if he really wanted. lucky for everyone else, he just wants to play volleyball. you think that it's a shame in equal parts that it's a gift but you digress.

the point is that you could never really be away from ushijima. and as hard as you tried to avoid the growing affection - you find that ushijima is always a few steps ahead. always reaching far beyond you with big, strong hands.

you try so hard, to avoid the inevitable. you do it with your whole soul. you're honestly just.. intimated. you've never felt something like him before - not once in your whole life. you're afraid of what'll happen when you succumb to the waves so you dodge the deep sea for weeks and weeks.

he found you after your shift one day after 3 weeks of dry texting and avoided phone calls. wearing a suit and a purple shirt and a nice watch, he has flowers too. and you're in.. a barista uniform with tousled everything and smudged mascara.

inevitable is really the only word. as you stop dead in your tracks, and as ushijima pulls you aside with the mostly gentlemanly smile. you kind of wanna cry when you look at him.

"i've waited a long time but i don't think i can much longer,"― he shifts a little. he almost looks nervous - it's the first time you've ever seen him look anything but overwhelmingly confident ― "i like you and i'd like to be with you,"

he doesn't really offer you much other than a confession and his hands. the frustrating thing is that he doesn't need to. it's the first time he's seen you cry but he handles you well, does it easily like he does everything else. like somehow he's just good at it, soothes you while you sob into his chest and melt into his presence and let yourself fall underwater.

in a probably not so surprising turn of events, you find that ushijima fucks with the same approach that he does most other things.

with careful consideration that seems effortlessly. it makes you feel a little hopeless that he feels good at everything. even at comforting you.

the first time you have sex, you take off his shirt for him. and he takes your hand and puts it up to his chest. gives you the most gentle look. his heart-beat is rapid.

"you make me .. nervous too. just so you know,"

the one thing about ushijima is that everything about him is big and wide and broad. he kisses you like he's trying to circle the solar system - there's a slowness to it. a vastness as he has you seated in his lap with his hands exploring up your body. his hands are everywhere. he's good with them. not too gentle but not too rough as the spread your thighs open.

he cups your pussy and it fits in his whole palm. his middle finger teases your slit as his kisses travel south, down your jaw and onto your neck. they latch onto your chest with a little breathless sigh - like he can't even breathe. it makes you clench when he talks to you - raspy.

"you're.... beautiful,"

he makes you shy. so shy as you lean forward a little and rock into his hand - a burning need nipping at you. and his eyes widen and his cock stiffens and his breath hitches and you think this is the first time you've caught him off-guard before. you wanna bask in it but you're too desperately so you latch onto his lips again.

ushijima does everything right. with knowledge in it. he kisses you and sucks on your tits and plays with your clit with this.. knowing. he likes seeing you fall apart he thinks. he likes how you get when he takes it much slower than he needs too - how he drags you through one orgasm to another with this lithe. he lets you lean over his shoulder when he fingers you - and his two fingers stretch you out like four of your own.

his cock is big. bigger than you think any person could ever take. you stare at it for a long while, gaping at it. your hands barely fit around it and that image burns itself into ushijimas brain like a permanent memory. your mouth falls open and your eyes look hazy and ushijima thinks that he's never wanted to be inside of something so bad before.

"it's so big," ― you whisper, hoarse ― "i-it won't fit,"

"i'll make it fit," ― is his only reply, kissing the crown of your head ― "sit tight,"

he does, by the way. make it fit. he makes it fit good - makes it stretch your pussy out but you don't feel like you'll break. there's a little pressure inside, and your clit swells with desire and blood - but it fits. and his eyes are glued to the way your cute little cunt seems to be swallowing him like it's nothing. it's enough to make him lose his mind.

"c-can i move?"

you nod and he does. slow at first. he draws the noise from you - a slow and soft moan leaving your lips as he drags his cock in and out of you. but it gets faster, goes much faster than you thought it could.

eventually he has you bouncing in his lap, on his cock, with such force that you feel like you can't breathe. it feels unbelievable, sets off a supernova in your gut like at any moment you could come undone. you feel like you're breaking and ushijima doesn't help, soft grunts and whispered affections.

"you're so beautiful," and "im so happy" that make you feel dizzy. you'd probably give him anything he asks for. he bounces you on his cock and lets his thumb just rest on your clit and you're so close you can almost taste it.

"cum for me," ― like he's begging ― "please,"

what choice do you have anyways? you cum on his cock with a silent scream, like your voice is tearing a blackhole into space and you shudder while he holds you in place. he finishes only seconds afterwards.

"did it feel good?"

you give him a wide-eyed look. he's dense at times. you don't know how to hate him for it so you just sigh and nod, cozying to him.

"y..yeah,"

he kisses your forehead, sweaty and tired.

"good,"

yeah. you were right.

you never had a single chance of winning against him.

»» — { ♡ } —— { ♡ } —— { ♡ } — ««

#WHY DID THIS GET SO LONG WHAT THE FUCK #return to sender #ushijima x reader #haikyuu x reader #prettyboy.thirsts #formal #writing tag #IM GONNA BE SICK HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN #haikyuu smut #ushijima smut

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

a break.

© @sonsofeorl.

ANGEL REYES.

MAYANS MC ┃ USEFUL LINKS

❝ request by @girlnovels: hi sorry! now realizing I sent a request to your main instead of here 😳 it was 5 and 8 from the prompt list for angel or any of the guys honestly and just how god tier it'd be?

❝ prompts: “Stop ignoring me, it’s driving me crazy”. / “You interrupt my reading once more, and this book will become a lethal weapon”.

❝ words: about 750.

❝ warnings: nsfw, cockwarming.

❝ a / n: as always, don’t forget to comment and reblog if you liked it!

The workload has increased the last week in the scrapyard, joining Angel's job with the MC to create an atmosphere of loneliness inside your home. Accepting that he'd continue having to spend more time in the clubhouse, you went to a bookstore EZ recommended you to buy a book and devour it during these days, as you used to. Just in a couple of hours you had read half of it, finding the story more interesting than you imagined when you glanced over the summary before taking it with you. And you were in the best bit when the front door of your place was opened. Raising your eyes from the book, you found your tired boyfriend dragging his boots on the floor, closing the entry behind his back and just sighing. He walked towards you to place an exhausted kiss on your forehead, disappearing after that to your room.

An hour has passed since then. Angel has taken a shower, eaten something and slept for some minutes —before starting to call your attention. He has sat on the couch in front of you clearing his throat. He has put your favorite tv show on TV. He has changed his seat to the sofa you're lying on, putting your legs over his to caress them, poke them and pinch them. But nothing works. Angel rolls his eyes to the back of his head, snorting annoyed while standing up on his bare feet. He has had an idea. One that never fails. His ace in the hole.

Your concentration is fucked up when a sweet but strong male scent fills your nostrils down to your lungs. You can't help but lick your lips unconsciously, glancing at him above the written letters on the paper.

“You interrupt my reading once more, and this book will become a lethal weapon”.

“Stop ignoring me, it’s driving me crazy!” He whines, settling himself between your legs and sinking his face onto your stomach.

His tattooed arms surround your body, taking a deep breath from the smell of your shirt. It smells like him. At least, you haven't forgotten him.

“Goddammit, Angel… you're such a baby”.

“Yes, I am”. He admits between grunts against your belly.

Leaving the book away over the coffee table, you land both hands on his head to stroke his hair. Your boyfriend snakes among your legs, crawling over your body until facing you. His smile gives you goosebumps, still looking tired but not enough to spend some time with you. And that's sweet. Really sweet. Now, you feel bad for ignoring him since he came. Regretting the fact that you could have had a shower together.

“Read for me”. Angel hums in a petition, moving his ringed hands to nail them on your hips.

If he's hard, you're soaked. And you can feel it when he rocks his pelvis in a tortuous slow motion. You gulp a knot within your throat, grabbing again the book with a trembling hand, noticing his fingers touring your skin down to the gems of your shirt to be slid beneath it. Your boyfriend rolls down your lace panties through your thighs, slightly wet because of the friction against his body until throwing them to the floor. You stare at him in silence, watching Angel undress himself and discovering he was only wearing a pair of short grey sweatpants. Nothing else under that piece of clothing.

Breathing through your parted lips, you see him pumping his glorious hard dick as he bites his bottom lip, slowly lying down back to between your legs. Keeping your eye contact, Angel digs his hardness with no rush into your cunt. You feel how it forces your entry at first before a delicious pop as his glans comes in. You can't help but moan with a low high-pitched tone, closing tightly your fingers around the covers of your book. Your drenched walls adjust to his thick cock causing you pleased tickles in your lower belly, crying out his name inevitably when all his weight is on top of you and his balls-buried deep inside your pussy.

“You feel so good, mi reina”. He purrs sinking into your neck. “Make this moment perfect and read for me… I need to be inside you, hearing your lovely voice”.

If you thought that Angel wanting to spend time with you even if he's like a dead body right now, wanting to be connected with you —not in an entirely sexual way— it has reached the maximum level of sweetness.

GENERAL TAG LIST: @mayans-sauce @peoniarose @destynelseclipsa @band-psycho @myakai13 @petlaufeyson @-im-fantastic- @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @rocketqueen @rosieposie0624 @ellyseveronica @Jessprins13 @diaryofkali @ravenmoore14 @starrynite7114 @kenbechillin @miahelen @monkeyluver4546 @sheeshgivemeabreak @jadesamhart @rawrlittlepanda-95 @megapeacelovemusic-blog @katsav17 @skits90s @wildsould1221 @littlekittymeow

MAYANS MC: @multiyfandomgirl40 @countryash345 @skyofficialxx @lovebennycolonmiguelgalindo @bellisperennis0 @chibsytelford @trulysuccubus @purrrrfect @witching-hour @leathercladmenfics @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @queenbeered @sesamepancakes @gemini0410 @pinguinstudiert @oscars-wifeyyy @meteora-fc @lozaa94 @arveeee @joupym @hanster1998 @missswritings @arana-alpha @lucillewinchester @theocatkov @telfordlowmans @fanofalltheficsx @aurelie-celine

#mayans mc x reader #mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #mayans mc #angel reyes x reader #angel reyes fanfiction #angel reyes smut #angel reyes imagine

[spencers-renaissance]

Shovel Talk

Summary: Hotch and Emily find out about Derek's relationship with Spencer and decide it's time for a chat.

Tags: fluff, humour, est. rel., protective!derek, emily, and hotch, relationship reveal, mentions of past hurt spencer

Pairing: Derek Morgan x Spencer Reid

Word Count: 1.5k

Masterlist // Read on AO3

Inspired by this post by @penemily that I couldn't stop thinking about. Honestly I love this fic so much lol.

Derek isn’t quite sure how he’s found himself in a vacant office after hours, crowded into an office chair with broken wheels as the two most intimidating FBI agents he knows stand over him.

“Either of you want to tell me what the hell’s going on?” Derek asks, bewildered by how quickly his evening had changed. One minute he’s sneaking looks at Spencer over his computer screen, and the next he’s hauled off to a private room like some sort of hostage.

He’s not scared, but he’s definitely a little pissed off. It’s nearing 10pm and all he wants to do is go home with Spencer, curl up on the sofa and eat take-out in front of the TV as they celebrate closing a case in their own way. He used to celebrate by going out for a drink, falling into bed with a stranger if the opportunity arose, but a quiet evening on the sofa with his boy in his arms is surprisingly satisfying these days.

Hotch raises an eyebrow. “We know,” he says simply, something fierce behind his words.

Derek’s heart skips a beat. It’s not hard to figure out what it is he’s talking about. He and Spencer had started dating a couple of months ago but had decided to keep it under wraps for now; something so young and beautiful was too precious to expose to all the inevitable eventual complications just yet. They’re so ridiculously smitten, though, that he’s not exactly surprised two profilers paying close attention had figured it out.

Ignoring the quietly humming nerves starting up in his stomach, he mirrors Hotch’s raised eyebrow, trying not to look as affected as he feels. “So… what? You wait for Spencer to go to the bathroom to lure me to an empty office to beat me up?”

“Maybe,” Emily replies, voice dry.

Behind the nerves and the posturing, Derek can’t feel a small twinge of hurt. “Look, guys, we expected it to be a bit of a shock, but we thought you’d at least be happy for us—”

“It’s not a shock,” Hotch interrupts.

“What?”

“It’s not a shock,” Emily repeats. “Everyone saw this coming a mile off. We’re not surprised.”

Now, he’s even more lost. “Look, can you guys just sit down? You towering over me is creeping me out, man.”

“Good,” Hotch says easily.

Irritation takes over, and he stands up. “You know what, if you’re gonna be funny about it, I don’t actually have to be here.”

Before he can actually make to leave, though, Hotch is shoving him back down into the chair, old metal and plastic creaking under the force of his caught-off-guard body hitting it again. “Stay.”

“What is going on?” Derek explodes. Maybe under different circumstances he’d be able to profile the situation but as it stands, he’s stressed and confused, desperate only to be allowed to leave this dark, cramped room and take Spencer back to his place. It almost surprises him that all he craves in such a weird and unfamiliar situation is cuddles and a nature documentary, but he’s been with Spencer long enough for it to be approaching normal. The younger man’s probably back at his desk by now, wondering where he is, and Derek would hate for him to be worried. He just wants to go home.

“Derek, we are happy for you and Spencer,” Emily finally explains. “But we couldn’t in good conscience let this go on without having a… chat.” Her face twists into the faux charming expression he’s watched her use to disarm unsubs countless times. It stings a little that she’s using it on him.

He splutters a little as a realisation dawns on him, equal parts bemused and offended. “This is… this is a shovel talk!”

“Yes,” Hotch says with a straight face, his expression tight and intimidating as he tilts his head to the side slightly, clearly entirely unaffected by Derek’s emotions. “This is a shovel talk.”

Derek feels himself relax, tension easing slightly. “Guys, I appreciate the sentiment, but Spencer’s my boyfriend; nobody wants to protect him more than I do. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I’m pretty sure we could give you a run for your money,” Emily says, her expression quickly transforming into something far more dangerous and challenging than only moments previously. “Spencer has something every single member of this team would die to protect. And if you get in our way, then we’re going to have a problem.”

“Emily, what, we’re friends.”

“Yeah,” she agrees, shrugging easily, “and I love you. But Spencer is my little brother, and I would do anything to stop him from getting hurt. As long as you don’t interfere with my primary mission, we’ll be fine.”

Hotch speaks before Derek can get a word in. “Derek, I knew Spencer long before you did. I remember the first time Gideon brought him to one of our lunches, and I saw something in him that made my heart ache. It didn’t take me long to realise that what I saw were the scars left by incredible deep-seated pain. Spencer has been through hell and back throughout his life, and he’s been hurt repeatedly by people who were supposed to protect him, including Gideon. I would do anything to prevent him from getting hurt by someone like that again, you hear me? Anything.”

As confusing as this all is, Derek can’t help but feel touched by Hotch’s earnest, emotional speech. Most of his nightmares these days revolve around Spencer getting hurt, and it’s kind of reassuring to know that he has so many people in the world who will stop at nothing to prevent those horrible dreams from spiralling into reality.

He can’t help but smile a little. “I’m glad he has you two,” Derek says honestly, looking between them, “but I can assure you that if I ever hurt Spencer for some unfathomable reason, your services wouldn’t be needed. I would hate myself enough for all three of us.” Even just considering the hypothetical possibility of hurting Spencer makes his stomach turn: it’s enough for him to know that he wouldn’t need Hotch and Emily to hold him accountable to that, his own self-loathing would be punishment enough.

It seems to appease Hotch and Emily, who Derek realises look sort of like intimidating twin mafia bosses standing over him like this, and they finally step back a little, posture relaxing.

“Well, what are you waiting for then?” Emily says, smiling for real this time. “Get your boy and get home. It’s getting late, you know.”

He rolls his eyes at her as he makes his way to the door.

“Oh, and Derek,” Hotch says, laying a hand on his shoulder, turning him before he can leave, a genuine smile on his face too, “I am actually happy for you and Spencer.”

Derek grins at that. He really is a lucky, lucky man. “Thanks, Hotch.”

“What was that about?” Spencer asks, his features twisting in curiosity as Derek makes his way across the bullpen to his boyfriend, Hotch and Emily emerging from the same room moments later.

Derek doesn’t answer properly, laughing instead. “You got some good friends, you know that?”

Spencer nods, still looking a little confused, but clearly deciding to let it go as he slings his messenger bag across his body, standing up from his desk. Derek slings an arm around Spencer’s shoulders, leading him towards the exit as his insides twist at the adorable blush that colours Spencer’s cheeks so prettily.

“Derek,” he hisses, “shouldn’t we be leaving separately?”

“I think it’s a little late for that,” he chuckles, looking over his shoulder. Spencer does the same, blushing even fiercer as he spots Hotch and Emily leaning against the railing, overlooking the bullpen with all-knowing looks on their faces.

“Oh my god,” Spencer mumbles, clearly embarrassed, but Derek just laughs again as they leave the bullpen and approach the elevators.

“Come on, pretty boy,” he sighs happily, sliding the arm around his shoulders to rest at his waist, fingertips pressing into the small frame of the boy he’s already falling in love with. “Let’s get you home. That penguin documentary awaits.”

“You’re gonna watch Emperors and Kings with me?” Spencer’s happy exclamation and the delighted expression on his face only warms his heart further, and in that moment he decides that he wants a happy Spencer and another nature documentary within his reach for the rest of his life.

Surprisingly, it’s not as terrifying a thought as it might once have been.

(If Derek thinks the shovel talk from Hotch and Emily is bad, though, it’s nothing compared to the one he gets from Penelope. By the end of the next day, he’s somehow reduced to tears that are both happy and the product of extreme terror, on the receiving end of a ‘baby girl’ ban for keeping it from her for so long. In the end, he decides that it’s probably an alright price to pay for everything beautiful that his life has blossomed into over the last few months.)

taglist: @criminalmindsvibez @suburban--gothic @strippersenseii @takeyourleap-of-faith @negativefouriq @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @livrere-blue @hotchseyebrows @jellejareau @reidology @i-like-buttons @spencerspecifics @bau-gremlin @hotchedyke @tobias-hankel @goobzoop @marsjareau @garcias-bitch @oliverbrnch @im-autistic @anxious-enby @queerminalminds (taglist form)

#cm #criminal minds #my writing #cm fic #cm fanfiction #criminal minds fic #spencer reid #criminal minds fanfiction #derek morgan #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss #penelope garcia #moreid #moreid fic #moreid fanfiction #derek morgan x spencer reid #spencer reid x derek morgan #derek morgan/spencer reid #spencer reid/derek morgan

[regina-dei-fiori]

✦─chapter: 1/? ( ↣ )

✦─wordcount: 1.2k+

✦─genre: angst with a happy ending, fluff, friends to lovers, college/human au

✦─fandom: moominvalley

✦─pairing: snufmin (snufkin x moomin)

✦─summary: as the night, cold air hits my face, i come here because i want to understand. understand you of all people. you've been so good to me, and i feel as if i've been unfair to you. will you help me sort things out?

or: when moomin and snufkin have their first big fight, they find themselves discovering new things about each other.

✦─loosely inspired by the song two slow dancers, by the one and only mitski

✦─read and support on ao3 💕

a/n: waaah, here we are finally. it is i, secret anon who asked @hanekdrawsmoomins​ if they could write fanfics about their au muahahaha. im quite excited for this, since this is my first time writing like, actual serious fanfics lol. but yeah,,, this one’s going to be a lil too much on the angsty side since ive been on my feels, but i sure do hope you guys enjoy lmao.

HOWEVER, happy ending is promised, so don’t worry about that dsjhgjgdskg

also, if anyone would a tag list to be created, plz tell me in the comments!

finally, i would just like to thank the amazing @iemondropsss​ for being my beta reader!! i really appreciate it <33

so, with nothing left to say, let’s get right into it >:))

-He's outside, Moomin,- a voice says from behind. -In the hallway.

I turn my head around quickly, alert from the sudden new sound. I relax when I realize it was just Snorkamiden. I make out her face in the middle of the club-like flashing lights. I'm sitting in a chair, decorated with pink and red paper strips. The music is so loud in the gymnasium, I could barely catch what she was saying.

The worried look she's wearing says more than a thousand words. I know who she's talking about, but I choose to appear that I don't.

-Who's outside?- I say as nonchalantly as possible, as I turn my head back to the table and start playing with the plastic cup in front of me. Snorkmaiden sees through my act tho. She always does.

She huffs, changing her expression to one that is not at all amused. 

-Stop acting stupid. You know exactly who I'm talking about.

I take the cup and slurp the near nonexistent juice. Why is he even here? Didn't he say that he never wanted to see me again? Is he just playing around? Should I go see him?

Fuck, I really want to see him again--

No. Control yourself, Moomin. You're mad at him, remember?  

I stay there, thinking for a while. I feel Mai and Sniff's eyes on me. Sniff is sitting at the same table as me. I know he's worried about me. He's been more nervous than usual, giving shaky looks to Mai from across the dancefloor before we sit down together, trying to find an answer as to what was going on.

-You can't stay like this forever, Moomin. You two will have to talk things out at some point...

-But does it have to be right now?- I turn back to see her again, my eyes pleading with the false hope of putting the confrontation off longer. Snorkmaiden doesn’t seem to change her mind.

We have a quick staring contest before she speaks again.

-He literally came running from his house, you insufferable idiot. Doesn't that mean something to you?

I almost knock my chair over from standing up too fast, and I really hope no one noticed. I don’t need more embarrassing attention than I already have.

-What? How do you even know that?

-It's easy to tell, he's panting like crazy.

I lean against the table’s edge as I try to make sense of what he has done. 

What does he think he’s doing? Has he gone out of his mind? Why would he do something so stupid? Go run from his house to here, in this goddamn weather? Is he serious? And what for? Did he...?

I stay paralized at the mere thought of it. No, it can't be. He didn't just…

-Well, maybe... maybe he forgot something in his locker-, I say in a desperate attempt to regain my cool. An attempt that, of course, goes in vain.

-Moomin, we both know he doesn't care about school work, or at least not to that degree. What could he possibly forget at school that would be so important for him to come running like that in the middle of a freezing night?

Her stare wears me down. I don't wanna say it, I don't even want to think about it. I wouldn't like to get my hopes up for nothing. I wouldn't like to get hurt…

But then again, why would he come?

I look down at the floor, meditating for a second. If I go out there, it will be inevitable for us to talk again. I'll have no choice but to listen to what he has to say.

And for some reason, that scares me to death.

Because…

What happens if he actually meant what he said? What if he actually doesn't want to talk to me anymore? I don't think I would be able to handle that. 

I sigh heavily. My head is spinning like crazy. He's outside right now. He's right there. And you, sir, need answers, don't you? Once you do this, you'll be able to sleep more peacefully tonight (hopefully). 

It really can't be that bad, right? If things go south, we'll just... Well, we'll just stop talking to each other and that’ll be that…

I shake that thought out as fast as it comes. If I think too much I won't be able to get anything done.

I turn my head back up, to see Snorkmaiden anticipating a final decision from me. I catch my breath one last time. Here goes nothing, I guess.

-Where is he, exactly?

I can see her body relax after those words come out. I can even swear I see a small smile tease her face.

-Next to the janitor's room, around the corner.

I adjust my tuxedo, and Mai finally breaks from her static position, placing her hand on my shoulder.

-Good luck.

I nod curtly as my answer and start walking towards the gymnasium's exit, fighting the urge to look back. I hope Mai can take the work of explaining to Sniff what the hell is going on. I feel bad for not being able to tell him myself, but sometimes even I don't know how to decipher these situations myself.

I hear one of the boys of the basketball team call after me before going through the door, but I already nod to the teachers outside in the hallways that I’m just passing through. I quickly explain I'm going to the restroom, and I hope to God the coach doesn't notice that I'm sweating quite a bit. 

I don't even know what I'm going to say once I get to him. We haven't talked in a couple of days now. He's good at avoiding people when he sets his mind to it. Who’s even supposed to start the conversation? That is implying he actually did come all this way just to talk to me. Damn, what if we're all wrong and he really just came to pick something up? Ah, this shouldn't be so complicated-

My thoughts stop once I turn around the corner. I stop on my tracks once I hear faint sobs. There appears to be no one at first glance, but then I notice a lump on the floor, right next to the door of the janitor's. 

I don't really know how to proceed. But before I can do anything, he notices me. He's wearing his green hoodie's cap tightly over his head when he raises his face. He watches me for a couple more seconds before slowly taking it off, revealing something that oh so breaks my heart. 

His eyes are red and swollen, and I realize that this is the first time I’ve ever seen him crying. His eyes are also sporting deep dark circles underneath them, and it looks like he hasn't taken off the hoodie in a while.

He just looks... So weak. So defeated. So hopeless. All I want to do now is go and push his hair away from his eyes and wipe his tears away. I want to hold him and tell him I promise everything will be okay. I have to remind myself that we have to talk first before anyone can be assured that they are loved.

-Moomin...- is all he can say the moment he notices it's me. He looks like he's about to burst into tears again.

Snufkin.

#moomin #moominvalley #moomin college au #moomin human au #snufkin #little my #snorkmaiden #moomin sniff #moominmamma #moominpappa #snufmin #moomin fanfic #snufmin fanfic #moominvalley fanfic #moomintroll #tove jansson #regina scrive

[starkerscoop]

Vacant Mind (Ch. 1)

Tag List: @thatrandomsomnia @longlivestarker @geen-beems @consciencecoward @aoifelaufeyson @rebel13lion39 @katzenbaby1  @helaisthequeen @im-a-goner-foryou @hornvey @darker-soft-starker  @nerdylocksandthethreebears @canreadbutcannotwrite @carelessannie @bluestarker @briesb1tch @skimparker @idiyeet @blushing-starker-queen @buckettbarnes

Let me know if you want to be removed from the tag list, or added to it. The first three chapters of this fic are being reuploaded from my old blog, so that everyone can access them from this one. If you don’t want to be tagged for the first three chapters, but do want to be tagged for the remaining ones, let me know. 

Let the “didn’t know they were dating” fic commence... again

- 

Peter trudged through the streets, biting back a groan whenever the bustling passerby would bump into him. He felt hot, unnaturally so, and the sweat plastering his hair to the nape of his neck did nothing to cool him down. He wondered dimly when it had gotten so warm. The snow at his feet clung to his shoes, reminding him of the chill he was meant to be feeling, but he only felt uncomfortable in his jacket.

He shrugged it off, allowing the cold air to encompass his heated body. He stuffed the jacket into his backpack as he walked, and caught sight of the Spider-Man suit nestled at the bottom of the bag. Any excitement he might have had at the prospect of patrolling was replaced by dread. He was too tired to patrol, but saving lives was a job he took seriously, and so he ducked into an alley and donned his suit.

Karen switched on the heater in his suit the moment he put it on, and Peter barely restrained his complaints. Karen was programmed to keep the heater on in temperatures below 55℉, and had been ever since Tony found out that Peter couldn’t thermoregulate. If he switched it off, Karen would notify Tony, who would then badger him until he confessed that he wasn’t feeling well.

It was a protocol that Peter had thought was sweet when it was first installed. It made him feel like Tony cared about him beyond making sure he didn’t die in battle. Now, it was a thorn in his side.

Peter could only endure the additional warmth for two hours. In that time, he stopped a robbery, helped a man find his dropped hearing aid, and returned a lost dog to its crying owner.

By the time he arrived home and pulled off the suit, his body was slick all over with sweat, and his cheeks were flushed with a deeper red than he’d ever seen. He staggered over to his shower, pushing aside the curtain and falling in. He groped around the shower blindly until his hands caught the knob, which he twisted desperately until cold water started running down his face. He grasped the wall and stumbled to his feet, swaying in place as he let the water rinse off his sweat.

His head felt faint, and as his eyes roved over the stall in search of his shampoo, his vision started filling with black spots. Peter reached for his shampoo bottle once he found it, but lost his balance and fell towards it. His head smacked into the wall, and he was out like a light.

-

A hand combed through his hair, gently tugging and undoing the knots in it. Peter leaned into the comforting touch, an entirely different warmth to the one he’d been suffering from earlier filling his chest. The hand paused its ministrations, but didn’t pull away.

“Are you waking up?” a hushed voice murmured by his ear.

Peter struggled to open his eyes. His eyelids felt heavy, refusing to do anything other than twitch, and so he stared into darkness as the hand in his hair resumed its motion. He relaxed into the bed, giving up for the moment. He let himself drift in the darkness, the hand on his head his only tether to reality.

“It’s alright,” the same voice sighed fondly. “You do like your beauty sleep. Don’t worry, Pete. I’ll still be here when you wake up.”

Peter let himself slip away further at the assurance. He felt safe in the presence of that voice, warm and loving as it was.

The darkness wasn’t all that frightening now.

-

The steady beeping of the machine at Peter’s side roused him from his sleep. He shuffled in place a little as he craned his neck to the left, where he was met with a heart monitor that sounded in time with his heart. He swallowed thickly, wondering how he’d landed himself in the Med-Bay again.

“How are you feeling?”

Peter jumped in surprise, his head swivelling to the other side, where Tony was perched on a chair and watching him earnestly.

“I’m okay,” Peter took a moment to survey himself. “I have a small headache, but other than that, I’m fine.”

“Good,” Tony said, before his expression hardened. “Now, what were you thinking when you decided to patrol with a fever of 104 degrees?”

Peter groaned. “I didn’t think it was that bad.”

“You fell and hit your head in the shower,” Tony stressed. “What if you’d fallen while swinging? I doubt you’d have gotten away with only a headache if you fell thirty stories.”

Peter’s lips turned downward when he noticed the fear hidden behind the anger in Tony’s expression. “I’m sorry for scaring you.”

Tony didn’t deny his fear, though he didn’t acknowledge it, either. “I’ll be adding more protocols to your suit. This isn’t happening again.”

Peter didn’t argue.

Tony’s shoulders lost some of their tension. “Are you hungry? I had someone restock the Jell-O.”

“Do you have red?” Peter’s face lit up.

Tony reached into the pockets of his slacks and brought out two cups of red Jell-O. He handed both to Peter, before setting a plastic spoon on top of them. Peter thanked him before peeling off the wrapper on one of the cups, and dunking his spoon into it. He scooped out a spoonful of the strawberry jelly and stuffed it into his mouth, paying no mind to the thin trail of it that trickled down his chin.

Tony swiped his thumb along Peter’s chin, clearing it of the jelly before sucking it into his own mouth. Peter dropped his spoon into his cup, watching with wide eyes until Tony pulled his thumb out of his mouth and cleaned it with a napkin.

“I’ll get someone to check you out and see if you can be discharged,” Tony patted his thigh as he stood. “Stay put, sweetheart.”

Peter’s jelly lay forgotten once Tony left. He had called him sweetheart. Just yesterday, Peter was trying to get him to drop the ‘kid’ moniker, and now he’d been upgraded to ‘sweetheart’? What had changed in the span of twenty-four hours?

When Tony came back, he was followed into the room by Dr. Althea Roberts, whom Peter was more than familiar with. Dr. Roberts treated him every time he ended up in the Med-Bay, and with how often he got injured, he got to know her well. Their friendship and Dr. Roberts’ talent in the medical field made her his favorite doctor.

“Mr. Parker,” she shook her head sternly. “What you pulled yesterday could’ve gotten you killed.”

“Yesterday?” Peter’s brows knitted together.

“You woke up a few times, but for the most part, you slept for a day,” Tony explained, taking a few steps back towards the door. “I’ll give you your privacy.”

Tony was leaving the room before Peter could tell him that he didn’t mind him hearing his conversation with Dr. Roberts. Still, he appreciated the space. Tony’s worry tended to morph into nosiness, the need to know everything wrong with his friends and rectify it driving him to budge his way into places he didn’t need to be in. Peter was glad to see him working on that — it was a byproduct of his anxiety, and one that Tony himself didn’t like.

Dr. Roberts started speaking as soon as the door swung closed. “You had a high fever. When you went to shower, you hit your head and got a concussion. If your head hurts, or you’re feeling confused, that’s normal and it will stop soon. You might experience some memory loss, but it shouldn’t be anything extreme. Any memories you might have lost will come back.”

“Okay,” Peter nodded to show he understood. “How did you find me in the shower? I was alone.”

“According to Mr. Stark, a friend of yours stopped by and found you in the shower. He called Mr. Stark, who brought you here to be treated.”

Dr. Roberts asked him some preliminary questions before giving him approval for a discharge. Once she finished speaking with him, she had a nurse come in and unhook him from all of the machines surrounding his bed. The nurse brought him the spare clothes he kept in the Med-Bay for when he’d inevitably need them, and he swapped his hospital gown for them. When he finished getting dressed, he exited the room he’d been staying in, and found Tony standing in the hallway with his phone in hand.

Tony slipped his phone into his pocket. “We can go now?”

“Yes,” Peter wrung his hands shyly. “Thank you for staying with me. You didn’t have to.”

A grim look settled over Tony’s face. “I needed to make sure you were okay.”

“I am okay, if that helps,” Peter offered.

Tony wrapped an arm over his shoulders, tugging him into his side as he led him to the reception counter he’d be discharged at. Peter tried not to sink into the touch, wanting to avoid giving away how much it pleased him to be so close to Tony, but he couldn’t help curling just a little bit closer.  

“It does.”

#starker #starkerscoopwrites #vacant mind fic #didn’t know they were dating

[waatermelon-sugaar]

The Rules of Sabacc

Pairing = Poe x gn!reader

Words = 1.2k

Summary = You and Poe fight kiss over a game of Sabacc

Warnings = Insinuation of sex, gambling

A/N = Prompt no.39 requested by @poedameronloverx​ as part of my 300 follower celebration, thanks so much, hope you like it! Prompt was “Just kiss already, we all know the world wants you two together!” w/ Poe  and bolded in text

I read the rules for sabacc multiple times so i could try and describe it but im sorry i do not understand this game - as far as I understand it’s a bit like Blackjack? Just to 23? And make in space?

Posted to AO3

Masterlist 

***

Sometimes Poe really got on your nerves.

Like now. Why did he really feel the need to challenge this? You’d put your cards down in a flourish, to the combined groans of Rose and Finn, while Rey had sat this round out, having lost all her chips in the last round.

Finn had put his cards down first, causing you all to stare at him. “Minus?” You didn’t mean to make Finn feel bad, but- “How do you get a minus score in this game?”

“Finn that’s basically impossible.” Rey’s poking through Finn’s cards, trying to understand how he got to that point. Finn just gives her the finger and you all laugh. Rey’s not exactly in a position to criticise, bombing out the second and third rounds and losing all her chips, having got too cocky after the first round.  

Rose is next, with a perfectly reasonable score of 16, Poe had 22, and you’d waited to put your cards down last with an unnecessary flourish and a huge grin. “Read ‘em and weep, Dameron,” you flashed a grin at him. “23, bang on.”

There had already been debates (read: arguments) springing up during the previous rounds, but now you and Poe were drawing with 2 wins each, and this one was to be the decider.

The 5 of you had planned to play sabacc after Poe had made the bold declaration that “he was the best at sabacc.” That had inevitably sparked protests, with you and Rey arguing that no-one could claim to be the best; it was a game of luck and skill - impossible to predict.

But of course Poe couldn’t just take your word for it, instead leaning forward to- “Stop poking your grubby fingers at my cards!”

“I’m just double-checking!” He protests, still checking, and mentally counting, you could see it behind his eyes. “I’m not saying you did it on purpose, but everyone can miscount!”

In retaliation, you move towards him, hand threading through his curls, ruffling it up, one advantage to knowing all his weak spots. Normally your hand is in his hair brings him comfort and he’ll lean towards you, keen for more, but not today.

Immediately, his upper body is recoiling, leaning closer to Finn to get away from you, even as you follow him, like the two of you are tied together. Sometimes you spend enough time together that it feels like you are.

And Poe’s mock-horrified gasp is kind of adorable, even if he is far too protective of his hair.

You let out a huff, aware he is overreacting for the sake of your friends, and you suddenly notice Rey with a look in her eyes. A look that says she knows far more than you think she has any right to.

So you add a bit of bite when you speak, leaning over to where Poe’s cards are lying. “Oh grow up Poe. Your hair will survive … and more importantly my cards beat yours!” You spread his cards out in order to see them better, quickly adding up his points. “Look! Count your Flasks, and then if you add Balance, which is minus 11, you’ve got 22, and I’ve got 23 because the Ace is 0 - you know I’m right!”

Poe draws himself up, squaring up to you, your faces coming dangerously close considering you’re in public. You want to quirk your eyebrow at him, ask him what he thinks he’s doing, because all your friends are right there, and they don’t know you're dating yet, the two of you preferring to keep your relationship under wraps until you’d both figured out what you wanted for your futures.

But you don’t, because your friends are right there, and Rey is starting to smirk in your periphery, and you suddenly think that the two of you might not be as good at hiding your relationship as you think you are.

You allow yourself a second, while you remember how you and Poe had even ended up together, wandering the halls after a particularly dangerous mission, neither of you ready to say goodbye, wanting reassurance that there was someone out there who was also alive, who knew what you’d both gone through.

Before you knew it, you’d been wandering around empty hallways holding hands for hours.

And then you were standing in front of your room, and Poe didn't want to go, not letting go of you, and you didn’t want him too, but both of you feeling the pressure of expectation now he was at your door.

So instead of sending him away, which you probably should have done, you’d invited him in, and you’d cuddled all night long, finding the steady reassurance of another person more grounding than anything else.

And when you’d woken in the morning, limbs tangled and eyes heavy, you’d kissed, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Ever since, it had been almost impossible to quash Poe’s enthusiasm. It had been his idea to keep it a secret for the first few months, out of worry what everyone else would think, and not wanting other people’s expectations to affect how the two of you behaved.

It was precious and delicate, this thing the two of you were nurturing, and neither of you wanted it to break. Just let it grow a little, grow a little stronger, a little better, a little tougher, before you introduced it to this hard, cruel galaxy.

However, despite Poe’s idea for secrecy, he was insatiable, hand sneaking around your back when he thought he could get away with it, pulling you to one side after a brief so he could sneak a kiss, and once, comming you to come to his x-wing ‘for an emergency’, only for you to get there and find out he wanted to tell you about his biggest fantasy.

You’d do it again.

You're broken out of your memories by Rose. “Just kiss already, we all know the world wants you two together!”

You turn your head, confused and a little worried she’d managed to figure it out. You manage to get out half a word, a strangled, “What-?”

But then Poe’s hand is on your chin, guiding you back to face him, soft and light enough that you could turn away if you wanted to. You don’t resist, your head turning back to him, and watching as his eyes close in clear invitation.

You take half a beat, aware that your friends are watching in anticipation, but also Poe’s eyelashes are so long, resting on his cheeks like that, and maybe he’s right to be vain about his hair, he’s so cute-

And then you’re leaning in, your impulse control vanishing, and all you can think is that you’ll give the others a show and a half.

You do, because automatically, Poe’s hands are on your waist, yours in his hair, moaning, and tugging each other closer. Dimly, you’re aware that your friends are simultaneously both aghast and cheering, but you only pull away when Poe tries to slip you the tongue.

That man has less self control than you do. But you don't need to give your friends that much of a show.

You’re looking at him for a second, your faces still too close to each other, and suddenly you really, really want to kiss him again. You close your eyes and lean towards him again, when Finn puts his hand on your shoulder, clearing his throat, and pulling you away.

“Well,” Rey looks far too pleased with herself, and you suddenly register that she’s slipping credits she didn’t previously have into her pocket, while Rose’s stash looks significantly smaller. “I’m glad you two have got that out of the way.”

***

Thanks for reading! Reblogs and comments mean the world to me 🥰🥰🥰

Tags: @fantasticcopeaglepasta​

#poe dameron x reader #poe x reader #poe dameron #Star Wars #poe fanfic #poe dameron fanfic #Star Wars fanfic

[tooruluv]

Tooru Oikawa x F!Reader ( part 9 )

❝ my love for him is much like winter, a skeleton for the world to see. too bad he never liked the cold. ❞

description: being the neighbor and lifelong best friend of tooru oikawa definitely had it’s perks. you were never an outcast, always had a seat at lunch, got into volleyball games for free. the problem was, however, that being in love with him outweighed those perks. you would never tell him that, though, even if it hurt like hell.

genre: best friends to lovers, angst, unrequited love, fluff if you squint hard enough

word count: 1,442

warnings/notes: i was able to be online for a bit so i wanted to release this (rather short) filler chapter for you guys! <3

tag list: @afuckingunicornn​​​​​​ @maii-flowers​​​​​​ @clandestinerays​​​​​​ @brownandchill​​​​​​ @readeretal​​​​​​ @wedojustbevibin​​​​​​ @shigarakiskitten​​​​​​ @shittykawaa​​​​​​ @saeranoppa​​​​​ @srirachibi​​​​​ @tpwkatsumu​​​​ @sempiternal-amour​​​​ @bokutos-h0e​​​​ @pinknugget​​​​ @intheawks​​​​ @tori218​ @seikamuzu​ @alexthe80swhore​

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You skipped school for a week. It was a full week of heartache; most of which included the following: watching new shows (and finishing them), being brought food by your very understanding mother, crying, taking very long baths, wallowing in self-pity (which is something you tried not to do, but ended up doing anyway), crying until you were dehydrated, and ignoring texts and calls.

A new week was starting when your mom walked into your room, interrupting your daily “stare at the ceiling in sadness”. She sat on the end of your bed by your feet when she said, “It’s time for you to return to life.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

“Sweetheart, I get it.” She placed a hand on your ankle, trying to pull your attention to her. You kept your eyes on the ceiling. “Trust me, I do. But you can’t continue to isolate yourself from life. You have a beautiful, bright future in front of you. Exams are coming up, and your friends miss you.”

You sighed. “I guess I’ll go.”

“Good! Quite frankly, I’m tired of lying to your friends. Did you know that Iwaizumi resorted to texting me every day?” Your mom stood up, sending you a smile when you followed suit. “Clean your room. I’ll drive you to school tomorrow.”

You agreed, staring at the empty water bottles next to your bed.

Out of the hundreds of texts and missed calls, you decided to text Iwaizumi back first. He was the one who you’ve known the longest (other than the other boy you shall not name) and had helped you through your Love Problems.

you: hey. i’m ok. pls tell me that you’ll be at school tomorrow

iwa <3: fuck dude

iwa <3: you scared the shit out of me i deadass texted your fucking mom

iwa <3: i will be at school tomorrow the question is will you

you: yeah i’m coming. didn’t wanna be alone

iwa <3: you’ll never be alone darling

Despite everything telling you not to, you got up that Monday morning for school. You cleaned your room, you showered, you got a good night’s rest. You even ate breakfast. Yet, you still felt like… well, shit.

Your mother drove you to school, sending you a small smile and wave of encouragement like it was your first day of kindergarten and you were scared to go in. Truth was, you wanted to throw up all over the front doors and go straight back into your bedroom and watch another Gordon Ramsay compilation on youtube.

You sighed and went into Hell (hell being school). You tried to act as normal as possible but it was evident that everyone in the entire school hadn’t moved on from the whole thing, eyes staring at you and inaudible whispers.

“Great.” You mumbled to yourself, whipping your locker open.

It was at that moment that Tooru Oikawa made his appearance. He was walking next to Hanamaki, talking among themselves, when Oikawa stopped dead in his tracks. Hanamaki gave him a small pat on his back before leaving (and effectively leaving the awkward situation that would inevitably happen).

He opened his locker beside you.

“Hi!” He greeted, as though it was the most normal and casual thing ever. “You’re feeling better? Your mom said that…”

You didn’t acknowledge him, closing your locker and walking to class. Maybe you’ll find Iwaizumi before class…

“Whoa. Wait!” Oikawa was walking beside you then, easily catching up to you. “Did you get any of my texts?”

You spun on your heels, finally facing him after a week of being MIA and trying to forget your love for him. He swallowed and stared back at you.

“I don’t know what you want me to do.” You shrugged. “I told you that I needed time. And by that, I mean I need time away from you specifically. I’m not going to entertain the idea of pretending that nothing happened between us because it did.”

Oikawa blinked, nodding. “Okay, okay. Yes.” He purposefully took a step back, literally giving you space. “But can I ask one thing? Just one?”

“Go ahead.”

“For how long?” He asked. “How long do you think it’ll take for you to talk to me again?”

“I don’t know. Maybe when the school stops staring at me like a wounded puppy.”

“I’ve missed you!” Sana brought you into a hug, her boobs straight into your face. “I seriously thought that you dropped off of the face of the earth.”

You let a small smile creep onto your lips. The first smile in a while. “Sorry.”

“Don’t you dare apologize. What even happened?”

“That’s a story for later.”

She linked her arm with yours before walking with you to the library. Iwaizumi and Matsukawa sat at the usual table, heads in books like their life depended on it. It wasn’t until you were nearly next to them that they realized you were there. You hadn’t been able to see Iwaizumi all day.

“Oh my god, she’s really here.” Matsukawa exclaimed, a bit too loud for a library. 

Iwaizumi got up from his seat (also very loudly, a squeak from the chair on the floor). He immediately pulled you into a hug, picking you up and putting his head into your shoulder.

“Shittykawa told me what happened.” He mumbled into your neck. You bit the inside of your lip and wrapped your arms around his waist. “I’m not going to ask if you’re okay, but I do want you to know that I know.”

“You always know.” You mumbled back.

Hajime Iwaizumi was walking with Issei Matsukawa when he caught Oikawa leaving your house. He knew immediately that something had happened, that something wasn’t quite right, because Oikawa had his head down. He never had his head down.

Iwaizumi turned to his boyfriend, telling him “I’ll be right back.” Matsukawa gave him a kiss on the wrist before letting him run off.

“Hey man,” Iwaizumi jogged to his best friend. Oikawa stopped, head still at his feet. “Hey. What’s up?”

“Nothing.”

“Oikawa.” Iwaizumi stood in front of him, cutting him off. “Don’t bullshit me. What’s going on? What happened?”

When Oikawa didn’t answer, Iwaizumi put his arms on his shoulders to bring his head up. Oikawa was red-faced, tears running down his cheeks. He was in pain.

“I, um.” Oikawa looked back and forth, never really meeting Iwaizumi’s eyes. “I told her that I’m in love with her. We kissed and I told her that I love her.”

“Oh?” That’s a good thing… right?

“She shut the door in my face. She said that she “thought that she was in love with me too”. And just shut the door.”

“Oh.”

“What if we got married?” Oikawa once asked you, a giggling child in the morning sun.

You both laid in your backyard, the grass long and bugs flew along your heads. You didn’t care. You giggled back to him.

“That’s gross! You have cooties!”

“Not if we’re married I don’t!” Oikawa stuck his tongue out at you.

“We’re too young to get married! We have to at least be old… like 20 years old!”

“Ew!”

You laid like that, giggling and laughing as kids, until your mom called you in for lunch. Oikawa ran to the door (“last one there is a rotten egg!”).

tetsurou kuroo :P: i heard that you’ve finally left the darkness and stepped back into regular life

tetsurou kuroo :P: hajime texted me sorry if that sounded like i’m stalking you.

tetsurou kuroo :P: unless you’re into that... then i’m totally stalking you...

tetsurou kuroo :P: PLS IM KIDDING anyway can i come over today. i have another hoodie for you.

you: you’re cute. i miss you too.

You walked home alone that night. After a while of isolation, human interaction actually seemed like a chore. You just wanted to be alone, even if it was just for a few minutes as you walk.

You heard walking behind you.

“You can walk next to me.” You said, knowing exactly who it was. “I know you don’t have practice on Mondays.”

Tooru Oikawa appeared next to you in only a few seconds, jumping at the offer. The roles were reversed now.

“I don’t want to overstep boundaries.” He said.

“I know.”

“I’m sorry, again. For kissing you.”

“I know.”

He stared at you instead of the sidewalk ahead. You kept your eyes on the sky.

“I’m sorry for telling you that I love you, too.”

“Don’t be sorry about that.” You stepped onto your porch where Kuroo stood, waiting for you. “That was the one thing you did right.”

#anime #manga #haikyuu #haikyu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu one shots #haikyuu headcannons #tooru oikawa #tooru oikawa x reader #tooru oikawa x you #oikawa #oikawa x you #oikawa x reader #oikawa toru #oikawa toru x reader #oikawa toru x you #tetsuro kuroo #tetsurou kuroo #kuroo x reader #kuroo x you #anime x reader #tooruluv🍄post

[wistfulwatcher]

Hello I saw your tag on that "im 25 and dying post" please tell us how it got better for you. Im 26, still living with parents, currently having a fight with my boyfriend, and i still have a year until I get my bachelors. The comparison to everyone younger than me is killing me.

I'm really sorry to hear that you're struggling, but I hope you can take some solace in the fact that that post has a lot of notes and you are absolutely not alone in feeling the way you do! I can certainly try and share my experience, but unfortunately I think the biggest factor is just time (and like, a buttload of self-reflection).

I moved back home after college and worked full time at an administrative job I was doing during school breaks. I majored in psychology and anthropology in college, and was planning to eventually go into forensic psychology, but wasn't interested in going straight into grad school. So I did that administrative job for about a year, and tried to find something that was a bit more stable and at least semi-related to my field. I did end up finding a new job when I was 23 - stable, semi-related to my field (a psych/research background was required), and decent pay (especially as I was still living at home). Exactly what I needed, since I still wasn't ready to start looking into grad school.

I was doing pretty well, until I started getting comfortable at that job, and then I started getting hit with the "I'm not doing enough," and "I need to look into grad school," and "will I ever find a boyfriend?" (friendly reminder that 23-year-old me thought she was straight, yikes), "how will I afford to move out, I have to save my money and do it soon!", "I'm not doing anything but watching TV, I'm wasting my life," "I'm lonely, but I'm too tired to try and make friends," etc., etc.

But it wasn't constant. I'd have a flurry of those questions and fears, and then days where I was just living life and doing my job and taking care of my dogs, without any of that. And I don't think I felt good or particularly comfortable those days, it was more like I just wasn't actively thinking about it, like when you feel "good" after a physical pain goes away and you're just normal.

Eventually, I started thinking about all of these concerns I had, and the fact that it felt like it was URGENT whenever I thought about them. It felt like I needed to get my shit together immediately. I also started to acknowledge that there was this big sense of guilt around those concerns; I was too old to be living at home, I was too old to be single, I was too old not to be starting a career. I felt like I was wasting my life (cue the guilt), and I realized that part of why I felt like I was wasting it was that I felt like I was missing milestones I wouldn't be able to do at a later time because the older I was past "normal" the more humiliating it would be to try (cue the shame and embarrassment, hard).

I also started to doubt that I wanted to go into forensic psychology. More importantly, I started to seriously doubt that I wanted a "career" at all. My job (as I kept that same semi-related to my field one) was absolutely a job, not a career. And I think this was a huge tipping point for me, because a career had always been a given in my life. I'm passionate about what I'm interested in, so it literally just never occurred to me that I would be content with a job. I also started acknowledging that I had some messed up associations about being content with a job meaning that I was lazy (because the only way to be ambitious is with a career and, more damaging, a lack of ambition is fundamentally bad).

Now, I need to clarify that all of the above occurred over the course of years. I was constantly seeing "friends" (i.e., of the facebook variety) go to grad school, start careers, get married, buy homes, etc. And with all of that alongside the entire mess I've outlined in the above paragraphs, it was really, really, tough. It gets hard to find a foothold in better thinking, I believe, when seeing all of these people (some younger) doing things "right" was really just compounding my guilt and shame. (I feel like it's worth mentioning, too, that I was always "an individual" growing up, march-to-the-beat-of-my-own-drummer, yada yada. I feel like that's worth pointing out for others who may be in the same boat, because I think it can lead to another layer of shame in comparing yourself to those around you - especially if it's a big part of your identity that you DON'T do that, because I think it's inevitable as you get older, and you're looking to reach these milestones that prove you're an adult.)

So, here I am, acknowledging that I feel guilt and shame about what I'm not doing. And suddenly I ask myself my first really important question: Do I want a career? The question hot on its heels is: Do I want to go to grad school? Honestly, my answer is no. There is nothing in me that's excited by the prospect. But what, does that mean I'm just going to work my job for the rest of my life? How is giving up going to make me feel better about Not Doing Enough?

As I'm opening this door (remember, years), three things happen: 1) I realize I'm gay, 2) I watch Dirty 30, 3) I start playing D&D.

First, realizing I'm gay. Woohoo! Not only was this exciting because girls are amazing, but it made me seriously look at myself. Realizing I had spent 25 years assuming one thing about myself that turned out to be completely wrong made me question everything for a while. I started to ask myself, "Do I really like this?" more often, which seems like a really obvious question, but I'm not convinced that it's one people ask themselves consciously all that often. But once I did, I realized how freeing it was to answer, "No," and move on to something I did like.

Second, I watched Dirty 30, the Grace Helbig/Mamrie Hart/Hannah Hart movie. It feels dramatic to say that it changed my life, but the older I get the more I honestly think it did. Mamrie Hart's character is a dental hygienist who is freaking out about turning 30 and feeling very much like that text post I reblogged. But (spoilers), at the end of the movie, she decides that she loves her job (job, not career!) because it's comfortable and she has fun at work, and that it makes her happy. She has other things going on, but the idea that a character in a film is content with her job and choosing to "settle" into her life as-is and she's genuinely happy about it? I honestly can't think of a single other time I've seen that happen on-screen. I still think about that ending very often. And after seeing it, I started to ask myself another question regularly: "Am I happy?" Again, this feels pretty obvious, but I think there is something incredibly empowering about making sure you are happy on a regular basis, instead of just assuming that you're fine until something hurts.

Third, I started playing D&D. This is not a plug for D&D! (Well, maybe a little.) One thing that happened to me when I started to get into the urgent-guilt-shame-confusion mess of my mid-20s was that I got very much into a routine of go to work, come home, sleep, go to work, come home, sleep, be totally brain-dead on the weekend, repeat. I found it very difficult to feel creative because I was just wiped, and as all of my creative outlets (gifs, fanfic) are self-motivated, it was really easy to brush them off. I ended up starting Critical Role (this is also not a plug for CR! well, maybe), and I wanted to give D&D a try myself. (I was VERY lucky - my best friend happened to be listening to the Adventure Zone at the same time I started CR, and she wanted to try to run a game. The stars truly aligned!)

I started playing, then DMing, and found that it was a great fit for my interests. I used to be a theatre kid, and I was getting to act again (something I didn't realize I was missing). I was getting to build and flesh out characters, which is what I love the most about writing fanfic. I was also discovering that I was stretching myself - world building and plot had never been my strong suit, but as a DM it became the majority of my creative effort. It gave me soft deadlines with people I didn't want to let down, and it made me truly social again for the first time since college. Essentially, it was filling in all of the gaps of what I felt lacking in my life. This isn't a D&D plug because it wasn't D&D specifically, but rather a hobby that satisfied what was missing in my life. For example, I didn't realize how isolated I was before D&D until I had regular interactions with friends, and that isolation absolutely made the urgent-guilt-shame-confusion worse.

D&D gave me that final push to realize that I was OK with having a job and being passionate about hobbies instead of trying to fit myself into a career, because I was getting out of that hobby what I had been convinced I would get out of a career. I started to really value that I could punch out and go have fun doing exactly what I wanted to do. (It feels so obvious as I type this, but it took me a long time to get here! Sometimes it really is that simple!)

The above is specific to my job vs. career struggle which may not be in the mix of things you're struggling with. But what I do think is universal/can be your take away, is that sometimes you just have to actively choose to let go of the pressure to be doing things. Which, I know, sounds so much easier than it is (and part of why I think it just takes time/is part of growing older). But I think it's something that can be worked at over time, by checking in with yourself about what you feel, why you feel it, and what you need to make yourself feel better in the present.

It's been 6 years since I started that semi-related job, and I'm still there. I still live with my mom. I'm still single. My circumstances have not changed since 24, but honestly? I'm OK. When I check in with myself about it, I do enjoy living with my mom and our dogs (even though I'm 30 and "real" adults move out). I am happy more often than I'm not (much more, actually!). I have a job that allows me to be done after 8 hours, and I have hobbies I look forward to doing each night (and the energy to do them, most of the time). My weekends are free to play D&D with my friends and laugh until I cry. That is what I've worked out as my definition of what I want life to be right now. You'll notice it includes none of the "milestones" that those younger than me have hit.

As I noted on that text post tag, I still struggle with this. I definitely have days where I think, I'm a mess, I'm not DOING anything. It's hard. But time does help, those days become fewer and farther between.

I know that was probably a hundred times longer than you wanted it to be, but I did want to illustrate just how much of a process it is. It takes time. My summary advice is to check in with yourself often, be honest about what you want and what you need, do not let anyone else define where you "should" be. And if you aren't living life how you want to be, identify what you can do (however small) to make yourself feel like you're getting closer.

#ask #me #personal #i am so sorry this is a novel #i hope that it helps you even a little! #can you believe i can write about myself for 2 hours? embarrassing lmao #long post

[ninak803]

Elitist Nightmares

Another chapter is ready! Enjoy it. & read tags for CW.

@whataboutmyfries I don't know what to say... You're such an incredible good, nice, amazing bean!

Characters belong to @lumosinlove

@sunflowerfox87 here is a new Chapter!

Chapter 6

Remus

Remus walked up and down in his living room. He felt Leo’s eyes on him, following every step he took

The last few days, they had spent refining their plan and by now it was a pretty decent one. Sure, there still were variables, like Sirius himself, but they couldn't do much about it. They also didn't know when they would kick it off or how everything would work out in the end, but their plan couldn't get any better.

Remus sighed and sat down next to Leo.

“I went over it again and again. It's good as it is.” he said.

Leo nodded.

“You're nervous.” he stated.

Remus bit his lip; nervous was an understatement. He was supposed to trust a Black. Someone who was part of the family, who… No. His mind wouldn't go back to his own family. Not now, he still had work to do. He needed to stay calm.

“Yeah. I am. This is just not what I thought this mission would look like, not at all. I like to have control over things and now I have to trust Sirius Black to work with me.” Remus shook his head “I don't like it. I don't like him, I guess.”

“You don't like his family. And if he really is lying, you can still kill him.”

Remus laughed a little.

“You're right.”

They sat in silence for a while, Remus still thinking about everything he and Leo had talked about the last couple of hours. Remus rotated his shoulders a little to get rid of the tension in his muscles. It didn't work.

“You're going to work with O'Hara and Tremblay afterwards.” Remus said.

The younger one turned his head to look at him, something showing in his eyes. Curiosity, joy maybe, but definitely a bit of nervousness.

“They can teach you more. Both of them are pretty good at what they are doing. Usually. And I don't know what Dumbledore wants me to do next, I guess I'll have some time off, which would be good, considering that I have a houseguest by then.”

Leo nodded, a small smile on his lips.

“Yeah, sure. I don't mind. They both seemed… nice.”

Remus looked at him, then grinned a bit.

“Sure. You'll be doing fine with them.”

He took a sip from his coffee and scrunched his nose. It was cold by now and there was nothing worse than cold coffee, he sighed.

“Okay… You have the rest of the day off, Leo. I'm going to meet Sirius tonight and tell him about the details. I don't need you for that.”

“You sure? I could wait in the car, like the last time.”

Remus shook his head.

“No. I appreciate it, but no. You get some sleep tonight.”

---

It was the middle of the night as Remus sneaked through the Blacks mansion. He tried to not make any sound and listened very carefully if there was someone still awake who could notice him. He opened Sirius' bedroom door just a crack and slipped in. It was dark and Remus could hear Sirius soft, regular breaths. He was asleep. Well, not for very long anymore. Remus moved closer to his bed and looked at him; he was lying on his back, his mouth slightly ajar, his hair a mess around his head. He looked… calm. Remus hadn't seen him so relaxed before, he always seemed so stressed and restrained, but right now he seemed peaceful. Remus almost had a bad conscience that he would wake him up any moment. Just almost.

He touched Sirius' shoulder gently. When he didn't react, Remus shook him a bit. That did the trick. Sirius opened his eyes and almost jumped out of his bed when he noticed Remus. His hand moved up to his heart.

“Fuck you. You scared me. That's your way to get in touch with me? Scaring me to death?” Sirius said, his voice still heavy from sleeping.

Sirius sat upright, moved a hand through his hair.

“So what's up, Amber Eyes?”

That confused Remus a bit.

“Amber Eyes?” he asked.

Sirius just shrugged.

“Tell me why you're here.”

Remus sat down next to Sirius on his bed and nodded.

“Okay, so we came up with a plan, how we will handle this situation, but you have to cooperate, otherwise your death is inevitable.”

“Im fine with my death…” Sirius whispered, almost inaudible.

That and the sadness in his voice made Remus heart hurt. He swallowed.

“Well, we're going to fake your death, everyone is going to think you're dead. That'll work for my purposes. And until everything is solved, and we got rid of your parents, you're going to stay at my place. You can't stay at a hotel, people would recognize you.”

Remus looked at Sirius, who remained silent.

“I'll need your blood to prepare the crime scene. It has to be a lot of blood, so it'll be plausible. You'll feel dizzy for a while, but you'll survive. After that I'll bring you to my place and then we have to wait.”

Sirius still didn't say a word, he just looked at Remus with a look he didn't quite understand.

“I have to tell James and my brother.” Sirius then said.

Remus shook his head.

“No. You can't tell anyone. I'm sorry, but I don’t think your brother would lie to your parents about it, I think he couldn't do it.”

“I still have to tell James, though. He is about to lose his job, he has a wife and a child, he needs to know. Also, he is my best friend, he will blame himself for it, he'll think it was his fault. That'll destroy him. I can't let that happen. You want me to work with you? Then let me tell my best friend.” he sounded determined.

Remus sighed.

“You think you can trust him? He's loyal to you, not your parents? He won't sell us out?”

“No.” Sirius laughed a little “He will be happy to know I’m out of my parents' reach, to be honest. I do trust him.”

“Okay, I'll be back on Wednesday. Try to act unsuspicious until then. Oh, and you can't take anything with you… No clothes, no phone, nothing. Otherwise it would look like you had run away.”

Sirius nodded a little.

“Okay…”

Remus got up and looked at him.

“I'll see you on Wednesday then. Don't do anything stupid, Im still watching you, remember that.”

Then he silently made his way out of the house.

---

Sirius

He couldn't fall asleep that night again, too many thoughts occupying his mind.

“You look tired.” James said.

They were on their way to a meeting early in the morning.

“Can we talk later?” Sirius asked him.

James looked at him worriedly.

“ sure. Whenever you want to talk, I'm here. You know that.”

Sirius sighed and nodded. He had three days. Three days he had to act normal, though everything was far from normal.. So he acted normal, he attended the meetings of the day; he said his opinion on topics where no one actually cared what he thought. He ignored the angry looks from his parents. Perfectly normal.

Back home he went to his bedroom with James, who sat down on his bed. Sirius preferred to stay in the moment. He looked at James, who was waiting patiently until he found the courage to say what was on his mind all day. Sirius was sure he had already noticed the nervousness, James knew him better than anyone else.

Sirius sighed.

“Okay, you won't like what I'm telling you now, but promise me you'll listen first.”

James raised an eyebrow, looking confused.

“Okay? I promise, go on then.”

Sirius looked at his hands, fiddling them. He swallowed before he started speaking again.

“So a couple of days ago, this guy broke into my bedroom. He actually came to kill me. He had a knife and everything…” his hand moved up to his throat as he remembered.

Shock showed on James’s face as the realization sank in. He opened his mouth to say something but Sirius lifted his hand before he could start.

“Nothing happened, obviously. I'm good, don't worry. I don't know what made him change his mind, though. He came back yesterday with a plan and you won't like that either: We're going to fake my death and I'm going to hide somewhere, I don't know where yet. And I'm telling you this, so you don't blame yourself for it. this is going to be hell for you. My parents will investigate against you, obviously. You'll get fired, you have to find a new job, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, James…” he swallowed again.

James got up the moment he had finished talking.

“No. That's not going to happen. I won't let that happen. This shouldn't have happened in the first place!” he moved a hand through his hair in frustration.

“James, that's nothing to discuss. It is going to happen, even if you're not okay with it. I just wanted to let you know beforehand.”

James shook his head vigorously.

“It's my chance to get away from my parents, to get out of this hell of a life.” Sirius tried to argue, “Please, don't be angry.”

He looked at his best friend pleading, and James sighed.

“Promise me nothing is going to happen to you. And you have to contact me as soon as possible, I need to know you're okay and not actually dead. Fuck. I don't like this, I don't like this at all.”

Sirius smiled a little.

“I know you don’t. And I promise, I'll behave so no one has to shut my mouth and I'll be in touch.”

He pulled James in for a hug and he wished he never had to let go. He wasn't so sure if Remus would let him call James or write to him, but he was going to try it, anyway.

After a moment, he let go of his best friend reluctantly.

“When?” James asked.

“Soon.” was all Sirius told him.

---

Sirius was sitting on his bed dabbing on his freshly cut lip with a cloth, when the bedroom door opened and his brother stormed in.

“Why can't you just shut up for once in your life? It's like you want her to do this to you! Why do you have to provoke them all the time!” he shouted.

“I just told her what I was thinking.”

“Well then, don’t!”

Sirius shook his head, getting angry with his little brother. Who did he think he was?

“And then what? Just do as they tell me? No. I will not kiss their asses, I'm not you. I don't care what they say about me or what they do to me! And you shouldn’t either.”

Sirius got up and looked down at his brother, both of them angry now.

“I do care what's happening with you! But you know what? Maybe you're right. Maybe I shouldn't. You obviously don't care what consequences your behaviour might have for others! For me. You just care about yourself, you selfish asshole.” and with that Regulus left.

Sirius heard him go to his own bedroom, the door closing loudly.

He rolled his eyes. His brother was such a drama queen sometimes, so Sirius went after him, knocking on his door.

“Reggie, come on. Let me explain everything, without fighting.” he tried.

“No. I don't want to talk to you now. Maybe tomorrow, now fuck off.”

Sirius shook his head, swallowing. They won't be able to talk tomorrow. It was Wednesday already.

p.s. there will be more of Finn, Logan & Leo the following chapters, I promise!!

#wolfstar #harry potter #james potter #remus john lupin #remus lupin #remus x sirius #sirius black #sirius orion black #muggle au #lily evans #regulus black #assassin remus #logan x finn x leo #finn o'hara #leo knut #logan tremblay #tw mention of blood

[bryonieamber]

a little more than a year ago, i was only even remotely familiar with Xena: warrior princess because every time i went on ao3 to look at all the f/f shit on there, i remember i would inevitably run into XWP fics CONSTANTLY and it pissed me off.

i said to myself, "god, this dumb show is clogging up all the results. im NEVER going to watch this show, it sounds stupid, I'm just gonna blacklist it."

then some time around late 2020, my art school buddy maddy and i were chatting and she says to me "hey bry, i got this box set of every season of Xena: warrior princess! do you wanna watch it with me sometime?"

and i thought. "im gonna hate it, but even though it is CERTAIN to be terrible, i know i'll have fun if im spending time with a friend."

but it wasnt until a couple months later that we actually watched the first episode together. january 24th, 2021. we hadnt exactly been planning to watch it that very day, but i had just shown her Calamity Jane, and i think maybe that was what told her that it was time.

i wasn't super into it the first episode. i thought it seemed fun and campy, but i wasnt convinced i would really enjoy 6 whole seasons of it. i thought gabrielle was annoying, and i wasnt really sold on her and xena as a couple. which worried me, because according to maddy, that was the main draw.

but very slowly, that attitude of mine started to change.

"eh, i guess i can see it. im not sure i really ship it, but i guess its fun to imagine."

"oh shit. actually, they're a lot of fun together."

"this show has absolutely no right to be as fun as it is."

"okay alright okay alright alright alright these two women are IN LOVE and i think i might be losing my mind."

i think by episode 10 i was completely sold.

even back when i first started watching it with maddy, we only ever got together to watch like once a week or two weeks. it was slow goings.

and even worse, I decided i wanted to avoid spoilers because experiencing this piece of shit tv show in as authentic a way as possible was my #1 priority. which meant no browsing the tag on tumblr to find discussions about the show, no looking up fanart, and DEFINITELY no reading fanfics.

which sucked for me because i had developed a hyper fixation for this dumb show when i was still not even done with season 1. it was all i wanted to talk about or think about and it was so embarrassing and i was losing my mind but i was SO DETERMINED not to spoil anything for myself.

now here i am. 8 months later.

im finally done.

and i would LOVE some fanfic recommendations

#non art #bry shut up about xena #i have to go out of town for a bit to get my ipad fixed up #but when i get back ohhh boy its time #im finally actually consuming xena fan content today

[teamhappyme]

my world is grey without you

pairing: nick amaro x reader

warnings: tissues. this is not happy.

word count: 1.7k

a/n: this is pure sadness. i am so sorry, it is all hurt and the smallest pin point of comfort. my first nick amaro fic, and it’s gonna be ~heartbreaking~ but this idea has been in my head for weeks. hope you enjoy some of the pain im serving. 

****

You think Mother Nature must be in tune to your emotions, when you wake up that early May morning. The clouds were grey, rain pouring from the sky, collecting in puddles on the cracked sidewalks of New York City. If you had to describe to someone how you were feeling today, you would just tell them to look outside. You felt as gloomy as it was in the city today. 

Normally, your walk to the coffee shop was bright and full of sunshine, especially during spring. The flowers were starting to bloom, the sun was staying out longer, and the weather finally started to reach past sixty degrees. Instead it was filled with droopy tulips and black umbrellas covering everyone’s faces. 

You got your usual order, and one black coffee to go, hailing a cab across town to your destination. You planned on walking yesterday; the half hour walk would help clear your head and calm your nerves. But today, it would only leave you wet and cold.

Once you pulled up to the brick apartment building, you paid the driver and quickly ran up the stoop and into the entrance. You buzzed apartment 3G, and after a few seconds, you were let in. You rode the elevator up to the third floor, your foot tapping against the linoleum floor the entire time. 

You stepped out and took a right down the hall, stopping at the fourth door on the left. After three knocks, the door swung open, and there stood the man of the hour.

“Hey, Nick.” you gave him a small smile, lifting the black coffee you got for him on your way here. “I know it’s early, but I figured this may help you with any last minute packing.”

“I,” he started, running a hand through his hair, “what are you doing here?”

“What, you think you can just leave without a proper send off from your partner? Besides, I’ve owed you this coffee for three years. I had to pay up before you left.”

That got a smile out of him, as he reached for the coffee, and opened the door up a little wider. 

“Come on in,” the foyer of Nick Amaro’s apartment usually greeted you with an onslaught of pictures of Zara and Gil, accompanied by many drawings and art projects from the young girl. Now on his last morning here, the walls were stark white, void of anyone ever living here.

“I can’t believe you got this place packed up so fast. It took us a whole day just to get that giant brown couch into the apartment.” You said, as your eyes looked over what was once the living room. 

“Well, that’s what movers are for.” He followed in behind you, taking in the apartment he called home for the last two years. He moved in to the first place he could find, not wanting to spend another minute thinking about living without his baby girl. “I would offer you a seat, but my furniture is in a u-haul, probably crossing Kansas right about now.”

You smiled, as you crossed your ankles and sat criss cross applesauce on the hardwood floor. “That’s alright. I prefer the floor anyways, keeps me grounded.”

You were ready for the pointed stare you got from him, only making you laugh harder at your awful pun.

“Three years we’ve been partners, and you still have awful jokes I’ve never heard.”

“Hey, I gotta keep you on your toes, Amaro.” he sat down next to you, leaning back on his hands and crossing one foot over the other. You knew there wasn’t much time before he had to head to the airport; you purposely gave yourself a small window to minimize the hurt. “How long do I have you for until you head for the sunshine?”

He looked down at his watch, letting out a small sigh as he checked the time. “My cab will be here in about twenty minutes.”

“Alright. Then we have twenty minutes to make the best cop movie script out of our careers together.”

And for the next twenty minutes, you remembered almost every moment you spent with Detective Nick Amaro. From the first day you met, which had a rocky start, to the day he turned in his papers to be with his kids. There were stories of stakeouts that always included pizza and blaring rock music to keep you awake, monday morning bets on who would be in the precinct last, and endless amounts of coffee runs to keep the other person going. 

There was a lot of trust built between the two of you over the last three years. Nick had been through hell and back in the time you were partnered together, and there was no choice but to trust each other. At work, he needed somebody he could trust without any doubt, and you made it so easy for him. The kindness and empathy you treated him with from the beginning, even when he didn’t deserve it, made a difference in his life. There was no one else he’d trust with his life more than you.

After some time, you two were in sync with one another. You always knew what the other person needed, whether that was a coffee, space, or comfort, the two of you knew what to do. It made work that much easier, it made the bad days that much better, when you didn’t have to tell them how you were feeling; they just knew.

You had just finished the story about your first undercover op together, when his phone lit up.

“My ride is five minutes out.” he said, the trip down memory lane coming to an end. Your smile morphed from a shiny grin, into a small close mouthed line. It was time to say goodbye.

“I’ll walk you out,” you got out, barely above a whisper, as Nick stood up. He held his hand out to you, helping you onto your feet. 

You watched as he grabbed his backpack from his room, patting his pockets to double check he had his phone, wallet, and boarding pass. He took one last look around the place before walking out and closing the door behind him for the last time. 

The elevator ride down was quiet, you spent those thirty seconds regulating your breathing and swallowing the growing lump in the back of your throat. This wasn’t about you.

Once the doors opened to the lobby, you felt soft fingers inching their way into your palm, lighty holding you together. You looked over at Nick, slowly, but he was looking straight ahead. You saw the twitch in his jaw, and the bob of his adam’s apple, and you knew he was holding back his own tears.

Moving your hand the slightest bit, your fingers fell into place with his. You gave his hand a gentle squeeze, before following him out.

The rain had subsided considerably since you arrived, the downpour now more of a spring mist. You stood at the edge of the sidewalk with him for a few minutes, until he got the notification that the car was only five blocks away.

“Well, are you ready to turn into a Cali boy?” you asked, finally turning to see his face. 

“I’m ready for no more New York winters. I am gonna miss just about everything else, though.”

“But you’ll have Zara, and Gil, and that’s all that really matters.” you said with a smile, while gently letting go of his hand. “Besides, I’ll make sure to send you endless videos of me shoveling myself out of my apartment building, just to let you know you made the right decision.”

“Please, please keep that promise and send me those videos. There is nothing more amusing than you swearing at snow.” you rolled your eyes, and nudged his shoulder in annoyance. 

Instead of bouncing back off his body, you felt his arm snake around your waist. You leaned into his touch, letting your head rest on his shoulder. You felt the exhale of his breath before you heard it, along with the rapid beating of his heart.

“I’m gonna miss you, you know,” he started, as you focused on the way his fingers were moving up and down along your hip. “I wouldn’t have made it through everything without you.”

“I was your partner,” you said, the past tense already tasting like bile on your tongue. “I would’ve done anything for you. And I know you would’ve done anything for me.” You turned your head the slightest bit, just enough to see his face. “I’m gonna miss you too. More than I already do.”

He looked down at you, his brown eyes full of emotion and tears. His eyes flickered to your lips for the smallest moment, and you nodded, giving in to the moment, and the man you cared so much for.

His lips met yours in a chaste kiss, just long enough for you to remember what it felt like to hold Nick Amaro this close. 

He pulled away, gently resting his forehead against your own. You let the moment last as long as it could, before the inevitable beep left Nick’s phone. They were here.

You pulled away from him, your waist growing cold without his arm wrapped around you. There was a beep from a blue car a few cars up, and you let out a sigh.

“Your ride’s here, Cali boy.” you said with a smile, wiping away the stray tear that traced your cheek. “Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

“I won’t. Call me, whenever you need me, alright?” you nodded, trying to memorize the smile on his face. He found your hand one last time, giving it a comforting squeeze. 

“I will. Now, go, you’re gonna miss your flight if you hit any lunch traffic.” He looked up the street to the cab, before looking back at you.

He leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek, and then your lips one last time. 

“I’ll see you later, y/n/n.” he said, and you watched him walk down the streets of New York City for the last time. 

But you knew you would cross paths with Nick Amaro again one day.

****

tags: @hurricanejjareau @qvid-pro-qvo @crazyshannonigans

#nick amaro x reader #nick amaro fanfiction #nick amaro fic #nick amaro #law and order: svu fanfiction #law and order svu fanfiction #law and order svu #jules writes shit ??

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

seeing someone else.

BISHOP LOSA. MAYANS MC ┃ USEFUL LINKS

❝ request by @encounterthepast: Hello lovely Aurora, can I request angst prompt number 7 with Bishop please, thank you, 💕

❝ prompt: “Don’t you dare to lie to me again”.

❝ request by @arveeee: Hello my dear, so I was thinking, and there is one sentence to that can't go out of my head. So it is: "let me in" with Bishop (I know I'm boring). Well I believe in you, I love you , and I love your writing. Say hello to Arya.

❝ request by anon: Hi, Aurora. I love your writing sm 🥺 I was wondering if I could request an imagine with my man Bishop? I was thinking of something like the reader and him being in kinda like a friends with benefits situation, but she decides to break it offf because she’s really upset. And maybe Bishop doesn’t understand so she eventually explains to him that she wants more out of their relationship and he reassures her they are more and they always have been? Maybe leads to like soft/romantic smut? Thanks so much!

❝ request by @meteora-fc: hello hello! so, that new trailer huh?😵 would absolutely love if you could write me something for a stressed out bishop with the prompts "Stop ignoring me, it’s driving me crazy!" and "Let me help you make it better." Thank you tons!!💖

❝ words: about 1.4k.

❝ a / n: as always, don’t forget to comment and reblog if you liked it!

Another tequila shot goes down your throat, ripping it off as you almost smash the small glass on the table. Tossing your head back as you rest your back against the sofa, sitting on the floor, you take a look around you. The gloomy has taken over your house as the night has fallen a couple of hours ago. It's the fourth night you are trying to forget about Bishop and whatever you two had. But you can't dismiss from your mind his caresses —his fingers drawing patterns on your back, his lips touring your neck with delicate kisses as if he was afraid of breaking your skin, his mustache tickling your inner thighs, his raspy voice articulating your name in moans. It's the fourth night miserably failing, remembering the last time you spent together, the way he was holding his back pretending he wasn't sad because you were leaving him.

“Obispo, it's over. Don't make a big deal. We're just friends who occasionally fucks”. You scoffed somewhat annoyed because of him and his interrogation, but how could you tell him you were falling in love with him?

“I ain't making any deal, (Y/N). I just want to know what made you change your mind and keep a wide berth”.

“I'm seeing someone else”.

"Don't you dare to lie to me”. He growled, taking a step closer towards you with the intention of stopping you from picking up and packing the less stuff you had in his house.

“Think what you want”. You replied, rolling your eyes.

The first tear flows in the left corner of your mouth not appreciably at first, but then, some more until finding yourself crying. You miss him so much. You miss watching him sleep peacefully in the small hours, drifting slightly when you caress his cheek using your fingertips. Flexing your knees to your chest, you wrap your arms around trying to contain the loud sobs, hiding your face between them. How have you been so stupid to fall for him like that? The two of you made it clear from the very first moment. Friends with benefits. But after a couple of weeks, you started to notice that he used to push away any other woman that it wasn't you, he didn't spend much time in the clubhouse preferring to do it in your house —cuddling, watching movies, playing poker; kissing every single inch of flesh covering your anatomy.

Reality hit you the moment he murmured something like you're a miracle, thinking you were calmly sleeping between his strong arms and your back stuck to his chest, no distance among your bodies. You knew it was a thing produced by the alcohol running through your veins and it wasn't fair for you to fantasize about the idea he was catching feelings for you. So you just ran away, like a coward.

Some clumsy knocks on the front door of your house bring you back to reality. At first, you try to ignore them. It's not like you're in the mood for visits, knowing that probably it's Leti at the other side of the place, worried because you haven't replied to her text all day. But she insists and insists. And you know how stubborn she can be sometimes. Serving yourself another shot and drinking it in just one gulp, because you're too sober to endure another of her Ted talks about positivism and what he has lost, you stand up on your bare feet. Everything around you spins dizzyingly for a second until you can react, feeling every knock like a hammer hitting your brain.

“I've heard you the fi—”.

Opening the door to receive her, your vocals get frozen as you face Bishop in a deplorable drunk state. Just like you are.

“Let me in”. He barks, not being able to look at your eyes, trying to pass you away to the inside, but you stop him.

“Go home, Obis—”.

“I'm home, shut the fuck up”. He frowns taking a sip from a bottle of whisky you haven't noticed till now. “You think you can kick my fuckin' ass outta your life by saying you're seeing someone else? You think I'm fuckin' stupid, queri— Were you crying…?”

From anger, his tone of voice falls to one lower and lower, as the concern and the worry cover his annoyance completely. Throwing away his drink to somewhere over the grass of your yard, he holds your face onto his palms. His touch causes you to tremble. His warm touch causes you to break into aching sobs, panting as you can't breathe properly. All this time you've been thinking you have missed him, but you didn't have a real idea of how it feels until his fingers have been laid on your wetted skin.

Bishop comes closer to you, touching the tip of your nose with his. You can smell the mixed scent of cigarettes and whisky emanating from his cracked lips, it doesn't bother you, tho. “Don't kiss me, please”.

Until this precise moment, he has loved your begs and pleads to his bones, but now he hates them more than anything he could ever hate in his life. It breaks his heart. He can't deal with your rejection one night more.

“Why…? Why can't I kiss you?” He asks desperately at the edge of his tears. “Please, stop ignoring me, it's driving me crazy. I can't even take care of my own shit without you by my side”.

Your knees feel weak at his words, still believing he only says that because you're just a good lover, the best in the sheets, as he told you once.

“I… I…” You babble nervously, trying to not place your hands on the laps of his leather kutte to finally push him into the needed kiss you've been craving for the last four days. “I love you”.

And why the confession doesn't take him by surprise? Why doesn't he look confused? Why does it seem like he already knew it? Bishop can't help but draw a fleeting grin across his face.

“Do you think I came here, falling into pieces, just because it feels like being in Heaven when I'm deep inside you?” He whispers, clicking his tongue slightly. “I didn't believe you when you told me you were seeing someone else. But the minimal thought I could have about it made me lose the less sanity I have”.

You blink stupefied at his own confession about his feelings. Your fingers tour his abdomen up in slow motion, starting to have some faith in his words.

“Mi amor…” Bishop mumbles in soft giggles shaking his head. “I adore you, mi amor. I don't want anything else than to share my life with you, and only with you”.

He doesn't wait for a signal from you to kiss your lips, he just takes what it's his. And you can't hold back a painful gasp, expelling in it all the sorrow you've been carrying for the last four days being separated from him. Your hands grip his shirt in two fists, pushing him as much closer as the two of you can be, about to melt in the same figure. All this time you have been trying to not love him, to forget him; and you were just delaying the inevitable. You are made for each other, that's a fact. Your lips fit to perfection —your bodies, your hearts.

“Tell me you love me”. You whimper against his mouth, causing him to smile because of your need of making it real by these simple three words.

“Love isn't enough to express what you make me feel”.

Bishop bends down without prior notice to wrap his huge hands on the back of your thighs, urging you to jump onto him and surround his waist with your legs. You haven't forgotten how good his warmth takes over you when he holds you like that, walking inside your house and kicking the door close. Guiding his steps across your place and its hallways, he reaches your dark dorm barely illuminated by a post light outdoors. He lies you down on your bed —a bed that has welcomed you for the last eight months in every kind of state. Drunk, tired, happy.

Now, you're a mix of them. Drunk in tequila, tired of crying, but happy for having him back for the rest of your life.

GENERAL TAG LIST: @mayans-sauce @peoniarose @destynelseclipsa @band-psycho @myakai13 @petlaufeyson @-im-fantastic- @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @rocketqueen @rosieposie0624 @ellyseveronica @Jessprins13 @diaryofkali @ravenmoore14 @starrynite7114 @kenbechillin @miahelen @monkeyluver4546 @sheeshgivemeabreak @jadesamhart @rawrlittlepanda-95 @megapeacelovemusic-blog @katsav17 @skits90s @wildsould1221 @littlekittymeow @tenderclio @badame1240 @regalbanshee @greeneyedblondie44 @phoenixhalliwell @codenamewife

MAYANS MC: @multiyfandomgirl40 @countryash345 @skyofficialxx @lovebishoplosamiguelgalindo @bellisperennis0 @chibsytelford @trulysuccubus @purrrrfect @witching-hour @leathercladmenfics @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @queenbeered @sesamepancakes @gemini0410 @pinguinstudiert @oscars-wifeyyy @meteora-fc @lozaa94 @arveee @joupym @hanster1998 @missswritings @arana-alpha

#mayans mc x reader #mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #mayans mc #bishop losa #bishop losa imagine #bishop losa x reader #obispo losa x reader #obispo losa

[asteriismos]

Tear You Apart -- Bill Denbrough

Authors Note : wooo this was a whirlwind to write. self quarantine is slowly starting to eat me alive, but I hope everyone is doing good! stay healthy and wash hands! also, if anyone wants to be on the tagging list, just shoot me a message or an ask! I also changed around the request slightly but it’s pretty much the same thing. Requests are still open.

Warning(s) : smut ( obviously ), seventeen! bill denbrough, choking, this is kinda just filth but what’s new, im going to hell

Request : 

Loved your last bill smut you posted! Can you do one where the losers all have a sleepover and Bill has to share an air mattress with the reader and they end up having really hot sex while trying not to wake up the losers yet fail bc the reader is loud asf and maybe the reader has a choking kink and tells him while they’re making out to choke her harder. and the next day they have marks all over? (Sorry my thirst for Bill is unreal rn 😂). Ok so I also wanted to add to my bill x reader smut where he tries to push the reader to her limit and see how many times she can cum and it gets to the point where she’s screaming and crying at the same time bc oof 🥵 that’s hot (again I apologize for my horny ass I just wanted to add a little to my request)

When Richie Tozier gave the suggestion that the friend group should have a sleepover over Labor Day weekend, you were one of the first to scream yes. It was the beginnings of your senior year and you weren't going to waste a second of it, you wanted to spend every second you could with your friends and boyfriend, Bill.

The only problem was that it took a while to find the house you all should sleepover at. Though Richie had the idea, he said that his parents were planning something Saturday night, which meant a no from his end. Eddie’s mother wouldn't allow anyone over because of germs, and Bev’s aunt was not about to have eight teenagers in their apartment. 

Luckily, Bill’s parents were out of town for the weekend because of the holiday, so you all finally could take the plan for action.

The rest of the day was dedicated to getting supplies for said sleepover. You and Bill went to the dollar store on the corner for snacks, Mike and Stan went to get as many blankets as they could, Eddie and Richie got movies, and Ben and Beverly set up the spare air mattresses in the large living room.

Once all of you got back, the party finally began.

“We have to watch Jurassic Park. It just came out on to VHS tapes,” Richie begged to the group. “And it’s so good, you gotta admit.”

“Richie, no, come -” Eddie’s rejection sentence got cut off by Richie already putting in the tape. He wasn’t going to take no for an answer, obviously. “Fine, whatever.”

All of you laughed at the two bickering and settled in for the movie. You were sharing an air mattress with Bill, the giant bowl of popcorn sharing both of your laps. You two were all snuggled and cozy under two blankets. As the movie got started, you felt his left hand land on your thigh. It wasn’t unlike him to put his hand there, considering you two weren’t prudes to types of PDA, but for some reason it felt different this time. It felt like there was a motive behind it. 

You looked at your boyfriend, and even in the dim lighting of his living room you could see a smirk on his face. 

Well, you thought to yourself, two can play at this game.

Your own hand came down under the covers and laid on his thigh, giving it a good squeeze. Bill tensed up under your touch, breathing in a very big amount of air as he kept his eyes on the movie. He wasn’t going to give up without a fight, that was sure.

A good ten minutes passed with no other touches from Bill, maybe he had stopped for the night in fear that your friends would start to notice the strange behavior between the two of you. You two weren’t all that good at being subtle, to be honest.

However, your previous thoughts seemed to be wiped away when you felt his hand go to your waistband of your sweatpants. Your legs tensed up for a moment and your stomach churned, looking around at your friends to see if they noticed. They hadn't, all of them were focused on the movie, since it was getting to the good part. That was a good thing, considering if any of them found out about this ( particularly Richie ) you two would not hear the end of it. 

His hand slipped under the waistband and stilled for a moment, almost as if he was asking permission. You grabbed it and squeezed it, signaling that you were okay with it. And with that, he proceeded up go under your underwear lining. You breathed in sharply, causing Ben to look your way.

“Popcorn kernel,” you whispered his way. He nodded and turned his attention to the movie once again. From the corner of your eye you could see Bill laugh a little bit. Glad to see he was enjoying this. You tried to keep your face from reacting when his middle finger entered you. 

But it felt really fucking good.

He stayed with one finger for a while, pushing in and out slowly, with rhythm. You turned to look at him and awkwardly held up a peace sign, signaling that you wanted another finger. Bill happily obliged, slipping another finger into you. That was enough to start changing the pace of your breathing, your focus at the bowl of popcorn on your legs. The movie was playing in the background but you couldn’t even think about it. Instead, you were thinking about the earliest you could fuck the shit out of Bill.

Which was now. You couldn’t take it anymore. You had to feel him inside of you, all of him. The want and desire was enough for you to quickly grab his hand, stand up and say, “We’re going to go make some more popcorn.” The Losers nodded, their eyes still fixated on the film. You pulled Bill by the hand into his family’s kitchen, not wasting a second of the limited time you two had before one of them would get suspicious.

His lips caught yours first, his body pushing you up to the top of the island counter. You obliged, scooting so that your butt was seated on the edge of the island, your legs wrapping around his torso. There wasn't an open space between you two as you kissed, the air in the room got hotter and hotter. It was the thrill of you two doing this in his kitchen, but also the thrill that someone would come in and witness the very unholy thing that was going down.

Bill pulled away from your lips, his kisses instead going on your cheek and along your jaw. They got up to your ear and he whispered, “I want to see how many times you can cum.” It sent shivers down your spine. You two probably only had about ten minutes or so before someone got suspicious and would investigate. The thought made a pool begin in your panties.

His hand went back to where it had previously been prior to the kitchen, two fingers reentering you. You moaned into his shoulder, the soft cotton proving to be quite helpful in muffling your moans. But that didn’t seem to be enough for Bill, he was not looking to be caught early. So his hand came up to your throat, squeezing a little bit. Instead of pain, you felt pleasure. Bill had complete control over you and you loved every second of it.

The first orgasm came soon after that, your moans being stifled by his hand and his shirt. You thought that he would stop so he could have some action of his own, but he didn't. Instead his fingers kept going in and out at an even faster rate. It felt good to ride out your high, but now you were so sensitive to his touch.

“Bill, I’m still pretty sensitive,” you choked out against his shoulder. He just nodded his head and kept going. The dominance he was showing was unlike everything before, and you hated to admit that it was turning you on so much.

His lips attached themselves to your neck, his teeth almost expertly biting in just the right spots to get you closer and closer. You counted all the spots that he reached, but lost count in your second orgasm after seven. You’d have to do a lot of damage control with makeup the next day.

Both of Bill’s hands left your body, and for a moment you thought that he was leaving. You opened your eyes and reached out to him, putting your hands on his shoulders. He wasn’t leaving, he was just taking off his belt and unzipping his pants, quickly getting himself out of his boxers.

It didn’t take long for him to enter you, his pace slow as you adjusted to his length. Despite your past two orgasms, you still felt yourself moaning in pleasure from his actions. His hand went back to your neck, repeating the same squeezing motion every time he would thrust into you. You looked past his shoulder at the clock on the wall, seeing that about eight minutes had passed. You were praying that your friends didn’t find you in this position. 

“Bill,” you breathed out quietly, feeling the same fire in your stomach grow with each thrust. “I think I’m going to-” Your words were cut off by your third orgasm, hitting you like a tidal wave. He kept thrusting into you faster and faster, then finally reached his own peak, his thrusts becoming sloppier as you both rode it down. 

He kissed your forehead, pulling out of you and getting a rag to clean up the mess you two had made. Once you two were moderately clean enough, he redressed and helped you off of the kitchen counter. You semi felt bad, considering you have helped Mrs. Denbrough prepare dinner on this counter many times before and done homework with Bill here too. 

“I would just try not to think about it too much,” Bill said, obviously thinking the same thing that you were. Both of you laughed and hugged, your breathing coming to a safe pace again. 

When you two walked back into the living room, the movie was showing it’s credits. Both of you tried to seem as normal as possible, but it was inevitable that someone would ask something.

“You two said you were going to get popcorn, where is it?” Eddie asked, his eyebrow raising. 

“Yeah, we also didn’t hear the microwave on in there,” Richie added, a smirk plastering his face.

A blush creeped onto Bill’s cheeks and soon your own, realizing that you hadn’t been that quiet and discreet as you two thought. 

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