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mayberaspberrywrites · 1 year

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No One But You | Dehya x Reader | SAGAU

A/N: Your girl just got Dehya yesterday, and just had to write a fic in celebration. This is my first angst. Be nice you goofy goobers

P.S.: ...I ran out of Sand Grease Pupas :(

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Reader: Gender Neutral

Warnings: Angsty

SAGAU!!!

Summary: Dehya fears that you won't want to pull for her after the leaks and kit reviews. You prove her wrong.

The city spoke in hushed whispers upon her arrival. The whispers ranged from pure disgust to pity. To Dehya, it all felt horrible.

"There she is!"

"Didn't you hear? Her kit was leaked."

"Pathetic."

"What will the players think about this?"

Of course she'd also known the moment her kit dropped. She herself felt anger towards the developers for the way she'd been wronged. What she didn't expect, however, was for everyone else to find out about it. "Tsk…" Despite the backlash, the flame mane managed to keep herself together.

That only lasted so long.

Each day felt worse. She continued with her mercenary duties as normal, but at the end of each day, she felt herself break more and more.

It began to affect her battle performance as well, something that did not go unnoticed by her fellow mercenaries.

And then her banner dropped. She had high hopes that you'd pull for her regardless of the things you'd heard. As she sat on her bed, she thought back to all the things you'd said.

From the moment she was leaked, you were ecstatic.

"She's so pretty!"

Dehya smiled to herself at the fond memory.

"Do we know her name yet?" You asked your friend, your primary source of information. "They're saying her name is 'Dehya.'" Your friend responded.

"Dehya…." What a pretty name, you'd thought to yourself.

You were joyful the moment her npc version appeared in the game. Her lines were the only dialogue you didn't skip.

From that day forward, you told yourself you'd pull for her. You took in all the information about her that you could. You sat through the debates on whether she'd be a 4 star or a 5 star. It didn't matter to you, all you knew was that she was going to be yours.

That didn't mean you weren't overjoyed when it was confirmed she was a 5 star. "Ha! I told you so!" You teased your friend, who playfully rolled their eyes. "Fine, you win. It's going to be harder to get her now, I hope you know that." You shrugged it off. "I don't care how many wishes it takes. She will be mine."

And then came the day everything began crumbling down.

"Credible leakers have confirmed that Dehya will be on the standard banner!"

She heard the audio all the way from another app on your phone. What would you think of this?

"It can't be that bad. Besides, I wouldn't mind losing my 50/50 to Dehya." You reasoned.

Dehya breathed a sigh of relief. She knew you mained one of the standard characters already, but she didn't know how you'd feel about her now.

And it only got worse from there. The talk of the city began. It was nothing all that bad, at first, just a few apologies here and there.

"I'm sorry, Dehya. But look on the bright side…"

"Poor girl."

"Standard…she's going to be weak."

To her, it didn't matter. All she cared about was your opinion on her. However, the comments made her wonder if you'd be swayed.

What if she decides I'm not good enough? If I don't do enough damage, she might choose someone else over me…" She shook the nasty thoughts out of her head. No. I know my creator. They would never.

Dehya suddenly snapped back to the present. She was now laying down, curled into her blankets. She felt her eyes moisten. No. I'm stronger than this. I can't let the creator down. She sat up once more, staring into the mirror across from her bed. Weak. Pathetic.

They can say all they want. I might be physically weaker than the others, but I won't let them break down my mental state too.

From that day forward, she made it a habit to train harder. To compliment you more. To give you a reason to consider her.

"Look, she just winked!" You exclaimed, pointing at her. "What? She didn't wink for me though?" Your friend, who was doing the same quest, showed you their screen. "Mm…must be a bug." They concluded.

But You knew better.

And then the day of the livestream arrived. You preferred not to believe leaked banners, as you'd been fooled before. And alas, the banners were different from the leaked ones.

"Phase One will be…Cyno and Dehya!"

You were quiet. Too quiet. Dehya began to worry. She knew that her kit was nothing compared to Cyno's.

"Phase Two will be…Shenhe and Ayaka!" The video announced. "Haha, good thing I don't need either of them." You said, continuing the video.

Dehya continued to listen in on the rest of the video, but her mind became clouded halfway through. You never said anything about Cyno. She bit her lip as she pondered, the video quickly becoming background noise to her thoughts.

You never said you didn't want Cyno.

…And you never said you wanted me.

She clicked her tongue in frustration. Was she still not enough? She had to ensure that you still wanted her.

So she amped up her efforts.

She sent you mail. She never put her name on it. That would seem too desperate, she thought. On the day that her banner dropped, she mailed you 600 primos under the guise of maintenance. Attached to the 'maintenance rewards' were little trinkets, some that she thought would remind you of her.

To her delight, the developers decided to hand out 1 intertwined fate per archon quest. "If we do the math…that's 21, excluding the newest quest." She said to herself. "Plus what I sent…"

Unfortunately, your luck did not cooperate. Out of all of the pulls, your best item was a Bennett constellation.

"Bummer. Oh well." You closed the game, much to Dehya's distress. She still hoped that the day would come.

But then the whispers began again, this time while she was sitting outside the local tavern.

"Didn't you hear? The creator's considering pulling for Cyno instead!"

"He's the better option anyway, at least he can deal damage." One snickered.

She put down her glass, and breathed out a deep sigh before jumping when she felt a touch on her shoulder.

"Don't listen to them. I know she wants you more than anything." A familiar voice spoke. Dehya turned her head to be faced with the one and only General Mahamatra Cyno. She laughed bitterly. "Easy for you to say, General. This patch is in your favor."

Cyno crossed his arms, staring down at Dehya. "I mean it. Don't let it bother you."

"Yeah. Whatever." She smiled lightly. Despite their current rivalry between banners, Cyno was never hostile towards her. "It doesn't bother me any."

…I'll try to keep that in mind.

She waited. She waited for days, and she was starting to lose hope. She'd heard you talking to your friend again.

"My feed is full of Dehya showcases now. She doesn't hit very high damage at all." You'd said.

Ouch.

"I suggest that you consider pulling for Cyno or waiting for a good banner to roll around."

"Hmm."

By then, she'd tuned out. It's fine. Life goes on after all.

And there she stood. She felt the tears falling down her cheeks as she made no attempt to wipe them.

"Archons…now my makeup is messed up." She weeped to herself.

And then she fell to her knees.

But then she felt a warmth surging around her. She opened her eyes, immediately covering her eyes to prevent being blinded by the light.

Wh…what's going on?!

She heard your voice in the distance.

"OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! IT'S GOLD!" You squealed, watching the screen intensely.

There's no way…

Dehya felt as though she was flying. Her eyes widened as she finally broke through her dark thoughts.

You wanted her?

You actually wanted her.

Her splash art displayed on your screen as you shrieked with joy.

"Dehya! You're finally home!"

—

A little while later, after you fell asleep, the game transferred your body into Teyvat. This had happened on many different occasions at random. You weren't afraid anymore.

After searching for some time, you found Dehya standing by herself. She wasn't hiding her tears any longer. You quietly stood behind her, not wanting to scare her.

You should've known that a mercenary's senses were stronger than that. She sensed your power.

"I heard it all, you know." She stared down, willing herself to stay strong. "The things they said about me. Normally, I wouldn't care, but…" She balled up her fists, taking a deep breath before shakily exhaling.

"...You don't hate me?" She asked, slowly turning to face you, while still holding her head down. You softly cupped her cheek, lifting it up. Her eyes were glossy, and her cheeks were stained with tear streaks. You smiled affectionately, staring directly into her sapphire eyes. "I could never hate you, my dear." You pulled her into a tight hug. After a few heartbeats, she finally laid her head on your shoulder.

"I…never wanted anyone to see me like this." She sniffled, briefly lifting her head up and wiping away her tears, further smudging her eyeliner. "Especially not you." I look pathetic.

You shushed her softly. "Lovely, it's okay to cry. It doesn't make you weak." You hugged her harder.

Damn, she has some back muscles. No, no, not the time.

"Even after everything they said? You still wanted me?" Why didn't you listen to them? They were right.

"I've never cared all that much about the 'meta'."

You rubbed soothing circles into her back as you spoke quietly. "When I saw you for the first time. I knew I knew I had to have you."

"But what about what your friend said? They were right, Y'know. There are better options than me." You scoffed, smiling. "Don't worry about them. They're just a goofball. Dehya chuckled to herself before taking a long breath in. You pulled back from the hug, still holding her by the shoulders. For a moment, you two stared into each other's eyes. Dehya wished it would have lasted a little longer. "Chin up, Flame Mane. You and I have much to do together." You squeezed her shoulders.

She's so happy you didn't give up on her.

—

Bonus:

You were now playing from your computer. You were testing out your new main Dehya’s damage. After all of your combined hard work, she was finally level 90 and triple crowned.

"Wow…that IS some mid damage."

"HEY!" She bit back playfully.

"I'm joking, I'm joking! You did well for your first showcase. How about we grab some food to celebrate?"

"Haha. Sounds good, my stomach is hitting my backbone!" Dehya jested.

"Have you ever had sticky honey roast before? It's pretty good." You suggested.

"Hm, never heard of it. I'll bite."

Dehya looked on towards Sumeru City. Let's continue our adventure tomorrow, creator. You and I have a long road ahead of us.

—

#dehya genshin #dehya #dehya x reader #genshin impact #genshin #sagau #dehya fluff #dehya angst

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simpfiles · 11 months

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Sweet Paprika

a sexually repressed workaholic business woman enlists the services of the office’s fuqboi to help her be comfortable/confident enough sexually to seduce the man of her dreams. despite being only 12 issues the plot is jam packed with all the typical hallmark tropes but with a pg-13 rating (for the american release) and characters that hold more depth than expected.

the series is shockingly vanilla for a comic about devils and angels, which serves more for aesthetics and puns than lore or plot purposes. but there are two possible trigger warnings to be cautious about and that’s the initial slut shaming that’s prevalent through the first six issues and an emotionally manipulative ex.

the art is beautiful and stylized in a colorful cartoonish way that doesn’t take itself too seriously. it’s a shame that half of pages are over saturated by text that go to great lengths of spoon feeding the reader exposition. while the ending does resolve itself rather quickly, the journey was a fun ride. if you’re looking for a feel good comic with a happy ending then look no further. i laughed, i cried, i gave it a 4 out of 5 stars and put the spoilers part of my review below a read more.

i will come right out and admit my bias for this comic is deeply rooted in the fact that found myself projecting on to so many elements of this story it was insane. paprika’s relationship with sex, dill’s relationship with his father, anisette desire for recognition, even paprika’s trash ex, burnet, it was like mirka cherry picked aspects of my life and rewrote it into a romcom.

but aside from that, i really enjoyed how all the characters in the series whether protag or antag were given a chance to be more than just their archetype. no one is inherently all “good” or “bad” or too far beyond redemption (even brunet >:I) and speaking of characters i just want to gush over a few of the main players.

paprika. sweet sweet paprika. i love her so much. as far as romcom heroines go, she’s not as intolerantly volatile as some of the hallmark ones. i appreciate that she tries clear up misconceptions through actually talking to the other person and actually admits when she’s in the wrong (something that seems to be an impossible task for most hallmark heroines). her need to always clarify “petting included” is also a lil fun gag.

dill. need me a dill pickle sandwich amirite?? [[BRICKED]] i shouldn’t like this man as much as i do. he has all the makings of a typical fuqboi manchild and yet his desire to be “good” and pathetic allure has me captivated. also his communicate skills are next level. he stands talls where all other romcom heroes fail and i respect him so much for that + cute doggie uwu

za’atar. look, i don’t love him but i get it. he has a nasty temper, and a perfect mixture of possessive but still respectful. i like the contrast between his romantic life vs work vs the version that paprika has made up in her head of him.it’s very multifaceted. and i LOVE how nervous in bed he is. it’s not that he’s inexperienced but gosh, what a loser. i am once again captivated.

burnet. hate him. wish he had a worst fate.

anisette. bby girl bby girl. ty mirka so much for making more complex than the Bitch(TM). she’s still an archetype but a good one. i wish her nothing but love and happiness. i enjoy that she brings out a different side of za’atar and was able to be with him without being the “second” choice.

like i said, the ending was way too rushed bu this is one series where i’m glad everyone gets a happy ending (expect for burnet. die) and that’s a testament to just how great the characters are.

#Sweet Paprika #xian #ranted up a storm on this one #but gosh i really do love it so and hope others will read it and talk about it with me #a free version is linked in the title

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thesinglesjukebox · 6 months

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SHAKIRA X BIZARRAP - BZRP MUSIC SESSIONS #53

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Separation, Shakira-style!

[8.35]

Nortey Dowuona: FC Andorra are 7th in the Segunda Division; Karol G is on the Barbie soundtrack. I say this divorce was the best thing to ever happen to them. [9]

Peter Ryan: A comprehensive public clobbering, an icy-caustic bookend to the relationship that wormed its way into her discography with the ebullient "Me Enamoré", stuffed with double entendre indictments sharp and specific enough to preemptively render any rebuttal pathetic. Structurally it ranks among her most ambitious, all polyrhythms and quasi-freestyle character, the latter part no doubt owing to the BZRP Music Sessions format. There's catharsis in her kicking open the door on the private strife about which she'd previously stayed tight-lipped, and in the meta-narrative of the megastar shaking off the dead weight and finding creative reinvigoration. While they've become fewer and farther between in the last decade, she hasn't lost her knack for creating a Moment -- I heard this at the corner store, wafting out of passing car windows, on the dancefloor -- she wasn't kidding about cashing in. [9]

Alex Ostroff: The main attractions here are Shakira's righteous and yet somehow still icy fury and her impeccable wordplay. She wishes her ex the best with her "supuesto reeemplazo", but makes it absolutely clear that nobody is capable of actually replacing her. In someone else's version of this revenge-pop anthem, your husband absconding with a woman half your age might be a source of insecurity, but for Shakira it's another sign of his cluelessness -- at 44, she's worth two 22-year-olds and presents it as a simple and obvious fact. Bizarrap initially seems to take a backseat, but he brings plenty to the table, evolving his production and adding details that accentuate and complement hers. Tonight, I'm obsessed with the way he brings in that reggaeton-esque percussion right at "Me dejaste de vecina a la suegra/Con la prensa en la puerta y la deude en Hacienda" and how that propels the song into Shakira's triplet of creíste/heriste/volviste rhymes. Shakira's best material in the post-Fijación Oral era of her career has consistently been her Spanish albums, but until the restructuring of streaming and Billboard chart metrics in recent years, their popularity (and pop excellence) was never properly reflected. Of Pique's many, many sins, the one I'm most angry about was causing Shakira to relocate to Spain -- away from her main collaborators and recording studios -- and thus keeping her away from the radio at a time when audiences' engagement with global pop (and especially music in Spanish) seems much bigger and more permanent than the limited crossover moments of the 90's and early 2000's. Her post-BZRP releases have mostly been collaborations with an extremely varied list of rising Latinx stars in a wide range of genres, from a reggaeton heartbreak diss track with Karol G to a regional Mexican polka track with Fuerza Regida about labor rights and Pique firing the nanny who snitched on him for cheating. I have absolutely no idea what to expect from Shakira next, and I couldn't be more excited. [10]

Harlan Talib Ockey: 1) Cultural reset. 2) I love mess. 3) We now go live to Pique stepping on a rake. 4) Infinitely more energy than "Te Felicito" or "Monotonía". 5) Actually, Shakira hasn't sounded this forceful in a long time. 6) Bizarrap at the top of his own game rather than trying super hard to make corridos, for example. 7) "¡LAS MUJERES YA NO LLORAN, LAS MUJERES FACTURAN!"="margin:> [9]

Aaron Bergstrom: As a non-Spanish speaker, I'm probably missing out on some of the nuance here, but allow me to offer a brief letter of recommendation for 1) listening to this for the first time with minimal context, 2) focusing only on Shakira's inflection and intonation, 3) picking out a few lines where she sounds especially pleased with herself, 4) thinking "ooohhhh, I bet these are daggers," and then 5) looking up the English translation and confirming that every single one is just as vicious as you'd hoped. Because let me tell you, it is a delightful experience. [8]

Jessica Doyle: Cuando era niña, en mi escuela podría estudiar solamente francés; no empecé a aprender hablar español hasta desde cuatro o cinco años. Hoy tengo una cita cada día con Duolingo y puedo comprender unas frases, pero quiero apreciar el idioma mucho más, y lo que me motiva, es esta canción. Shakira canta como sus palabras tienen pesos y formas; se puede esucuchar y sentir cuando ellas se chocan con el suelo--"mastique' y trague', trague y mastique'," "con la deuda a la Hacienda." Además, ella gana confianza y acelera, asi que cuando ella canta, "Yo valgo por dos de 22," no es un cope defensivo, es una declaración de hecho. El idioma es su arma y su poder. Y el ritmo es único; ella no lo podría haber canto en inglés. Entonces, escribí este blurb en español; no lo escribí en inglés y traducé. Sé que hay muchos errores (Google Translate me dice que "I translated" no es "traducé," es "traduje"), pero creo que sería un error más grande hablar de esta canción en inglés. La escucho y me hace querer estudiar y aprendar más. [8]

Will Adams: An undersung aspect of what makes "Pa Tipos Como Tú" so compelling is how Bizarrap's beat switch-ups throughout the song propel it forward. It begins as an icy breath of Italo that recalls She Wolf's more delirious moments. Midway through the second verse, the floor caves in to reveal a heavy, rhythmic groove, as if gathering power for the next attack. The second chorus arrives with a walloping synth bass, reminiscent of "Padam Padam" but even more menacing. It makes for one of the most exciting listening experiences of the year, instilling an uncertainty of where this thing is headed next. All the while, Shakira floats on top, mercilessly delivering a brutal takedown that leaves nothing in its wake. [8]

Tara Hillegeist: The last time anyone on Shakira's level tried to write a song about how mad she isn't like this, it was over a decade ago, and "Irreplaceable" that effort absolutely wasn't, drowned in goopy self-affirmation and breathy lack of confidence. Compare the liquid contempt swirling around every syllable, here, the bared-fang sharpness of the enunciation as she howls "You thought you'd hurt me, you only made me stronger/Women no longer cry, women get paid". Shakira's fury isn't the fury of a woman left abandoned, with only scorn as her cold comfort -- as one of pop's inarguable queens, she has an entire country at her back. It's only natural that she can't simply settle for destroying her ex's memory alone, when there's an entire dancefloor waiting to destroy it in her honor instead. Pity Shakira's ex-husband, who will go down in pop-cultural history as nothing more than the expertly character-assassinated trophy this song leaves behind to hang on the she-wolf's wall, alongside all the others who thought to make a prize of her instead, only to find, as ever, that it's not their world to rule, but hers. Or don't; the viperous specificity with which she approaches the subject matter in question makes it readily apparent that from her perspective, this reckoning was only ever held at bay by the love he squandered in the first place. The other woman should probably count herself lucky Shakira only holds her accountable for thinking herself entitled to taking Shakira's place in his affections; if there were any other reasons, Shakira clearly wouldn't have hesitated to include them. Let the dancefloor show mercy, then, if there's any to be found. [9]

Katherine St Asaph: Shakira's hips don't lie; their involuntary sway, she's said, is how she identified Bizarrap's track as a Depeche Mode homage too chilly to pass up. And yet the track is not nearly as cold as the way Shakira vaporizes her song's targets from on high. That her specific complaints are relatively petty -- basically, that getting cheated on has stuck Shakira with a lot of rich person problems -- is beside the point. Repeatedly, she drops the real names of two real-ass people, syllable by syllable via careful wordplay, as if putting a scope into place. Her vocal is mixed loud, processed past any human timbre, and arranged to fill all space in the track. She sounds less like an individual jilted woman than a metallic weapon, than the genderless, pitiless, all-judging voice of God. Finally comes the killing smite: "and now you're with someone just like you." It's not often that experiencing a punching-down feels this bitter and inevitable, this compelling and correct. [10]

Rose Stuart: I said in my review of Olivia Rodrigo's "Vampire" that, in the year of breakup songs, hers was the only one that wasn't full of posturing. This is the only song where that posturing feels earned. Where other songs made neither their pain nor strength convincing, Shakira comes out triumphant, coming for blood with each finely picked detail in every savage line. The song never stops going in, even using the name of her ex's partner for some masterful wordplay. I've heard many breakup songs that try to go at the singer's ex, but this is the first time I've actually felt sorry for the song's subject -- after all, it must be hard to show your face in public after being roasted this thoroughly. [9]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: A swaggering, sexy encounter that has me simultaneously wanting me to say "I'm too good for you, bitches!" and "Step on my face, mother!" [9]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: lol hell yeah [8]

Alfred Soto: With any insignificant number of synths per track signifying as "1980s" the response to this track was a given, but the thudding insistence of its beat muscled past those assumptions. As alert as a burglar with good tools, Shakira talks so much shit that the judgment fades before the verdict. Imagine if they'd released this at the height of the 2010-2011 EDM epoch. [8]

Jonathan Bradley: Bizarrap's sleek, gleaming disco sets off the lack of adventure in Dua Lipa's 2023 comeback; these cool synths glide with a propulsive sense of drama. Shakira, uncharacteristically, is the weak spot though, allowing herself to recede into the background. She doesn't always command attention, but even her reserve is usually compelling all on its own. Here, she's content to vibe, waiting for someone else to make something happen. [5]

Brad Shoup: Impeccably imaged: we're used to that from Shakira. But the chilliness is something else: a brisk disco kiss-off that fogs up the anguish she's audibly fighting. The way she paces herself is really cool: icy pop in the first verse, a switch to reggaeton cadence at the end of the second that fully detonates in the third. She's acting as her own feature rapper: just another power move. [8]

Ian Mathers: I was the high mark last time we covered Shakira, but even if I was going to be here (doubt it!) it'll clearly be for very different reasons. With "Don't Wait Up" it was that fucked-up little organ (or whatever) riff, and while Shakira was good, her performance wasn't specifically what drew me to the track. Here, while the production is good, it's her performance that's much more central. Even before my monolingual ass looks up a translation you can kinda just tell from the vibe that someone is getting it in the neck, and/or Shakira is feeling her oats ("and," as it turns out) and then once you do... "Sorry, I already took another plane" is a hell of a way to start. Plenty of specific detail lurking in there, but the repeated "I was too big for you and that's why you are with a girl just like you" fairly blisters as it goes past. [8]

Taylor Alatorre: All else aside, it must really suck to not only have the Tsar Bomba of diss tracks dropped on you, but to have that track sent out to the world with this podcast episode-ass title. Like, at least Jay-Z can boast that he's part of the reason we all say "ethered" now; no such consolation here. The tossed-off nature of the release, while adding insult to injury -- you don't even get an album track! -- makes it harder to admit this into the pantheon of the greatest diss songs of all time. But I get the sense that legacy is not really what Shakira is concerned with here. This is a crime committed in the heat of the moment, in broad daylight, and everyone will remember where they were when they witnessed it. For her, that is enough. [7]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

#shakira #bizarrap #music #music writing #music reviews #music criticism #the singles jukebox #Youtube

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egyptian-sun-god · 3 years

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Never Have I ever S2

SPOILERS.....Turn back now I’m serious.

I’m waiting....

Okay cool your fault at this point

I was fairly critical of NHIE S1, I won’t lie. And I’ll be real I still stand by the fact that NHIE S1 was fairly meh overall.

But holy shit, they knocked this season outta the world man. The show really really found its proper footing this season. They were smart to keep the cheating for only two episodes and explore the repercussion for the other 8.

1.Devi Vishwakumar.

Let’s start with the main character. Devi still does immensely fucked up shit this season. Dating two boys and have them find out in the MOST humiliating way possible. Yikes. Being a really sucky friend to Aneesa and starting that rumour about her (inadvertently) and pretending to her. Stalking her mother and being possessive of her. The really awful apology that was pretty self centred, a bit not good.

But she really does do her best to improve and I am SO proud of that. She uses her father’s advice and apologizes better to Aneesa, she actually handled the Ben and Aneesa dating WAAAAY better than I’ve seen some people handle things like that. I might’ve blown a fuse if two of my friends had 4 tickle fights and had major PDA sessions when we were trying to do a group project. Like she handled that shit fairly well all things considered. Devi actually gets into the beginnings of delving into her trauma and her temporary paralysis and healing from it. I

really see how the label ‘crazy’ weighs on her and how she blew up with it and the message of destigmatizing mental illness. (Crazy Aneesa and Crazy Devi) Her properly bonding with her mother and watching videos of her father and remembering/honouring his memory hit REALLY HARD (since I lost many people in my family recently and that fear of forgetting them has been real). Devi is actually beginning to heal from the loss of her father by strengthening the relationship with her Amma. And the slap from Paati was so so needed, it really gave her a better respect of her mother and fixed the problem I had with Devi mouthing off so much to her Amma. I live to see good maamiyar marumagal relationships. Her relationship with Paxton is really good and it gets developed very logically and having her be scared of being pathetic but in the end she accepted her own self worth and stopped chasing after them which was good.

Overall Devi really blossomed into her own developing person and I actually like her so much more this season.

2. Paxton Hall Yoshida

I was honestly, like genuinely sad last season he was like 80% eye candy with not much else going for him. Paxton had so much faith as a character and Ms Kaling has really pulled him into such a better person this season.

Paxton got hit by a car before swim season, lost his ticket to college and wow, got two timed by a girl he liked all in two episodes. If he was salty about that for more than one season I would’ve completely accepted it. Cause that’s a bad public humiliation.

Paxton episode really really made me love him as a character (honestly more so than Ben) I think because I heard Paxton’s entire worry and irritation that he was being underestimated and no one really expected him to go to college from a friend of mine not more than a month ago. That shit is real, and it hurted my friends a lot that people were really underestimating them and just seeing them as a dumb athlete who has no hope of college. It’s really nice to see Paxton actually want to go to college and learn Japanese American side with his Oji-chan giving him advice and supporting him. And him bringing his grandfather to speak about the internment camps, that seriously do not get spoken about enough.

Also him putting effort and making a genuine effort to work hard and bring up his grades with Devi and therefore bonding with her was really nice to see. I wouldn’t mind them being endgame but Devi does really work a lot better as his pushy Indian mom/best friend/tutor. And Devi getting mad at him for him expecting him to hold his hand throughout really hit well. Was it deserved yeah. But Devi also did blow him off after promising him to study so his anger is justified there. I’m just kinda vibing with Paxton like coming up and taking a better interest in school and being a full 3D character. And that one scene where he gives the extra credit presentation and Trent high fives the man. Classic.

Can I also just say, it’s kinda valid that Paxton didn’t want to date her in public. Is it a dick move...yeah? But he’s within his rights to ask and she’s within her rights to deny. And he didn’t press her once she said no, he went along with it. And what Devi pulled on him is awful, and speaking as someone who’s seen popular kid cliques. Reputation really is important. Like what Devi did made Paxton lose face, if he gets back with Devi he ain’t gonna have any respect left in him. And Paxton was pretty right in deciding to not date her publicly, like even in the end he knows that his reputation is shot for what he did. Do we even know if Paxton has friends that aren’t fixated on his social status? Because becoming a social pariah without having any support of friends is gonna hurt like a bitch. Lord knows how Paxton gonna deal with it. I think Trent might be his only homie after the social downfall he will inevitably face.

I’m just gonna say, Paxton is my favourite now and I’m really rooting for him. Something I decidedly did not do last season. I’m happy Ms Kaling developed him so much and got me interested.

3. Ben Gross

Ah. Ben. Ben’s not my faaavouriteee.......like he’s fine. But I don’t love him. I can definitely see him and Devi becoming an almost endgame couple though. Especially with S2 ending.

Ben is fine and he’s pretty developed, especially with his episode in S1 and it was good he took a backseat this season and let everyone else star. I feel like he’ll come back strong next season though.

Personally do I ship him with Devi? No. I’ve been in a friendship with the similar competitive dynamic as Ben and Devi. And it was terrible. We loved to argue and we got each other’s super brainy side as Devi puts it. But we pushed each other faar too much and even the small things became arguments and each pthers achievements became jealousy. So yeah....I don’t have too much faith in the dynamic due to personal bias, but I’d love to see how it gets handled.

Also my brother Ben, PDA is a thing and it is common courtesy to refrain from it. Man’s really going at it with Aneesa half the time. But also the moment where Aneesa sort of choked on the presentation and Ben’s irritation at it gave me BAAAD vibes. It feels like while Devi can match him, they might push each other too far,

4. Kamala

I LOVE KAMALA. Girl is an ENTIRE vibe. My sweetheart, love of my life. I could go on. I really like her development as well and the banter between her and Nalini. The part where Nalini practically said she looked like a call girl and she was like ippadi potathaan velaila mariyaatha kidaikum. I legit had to pause, scream in laughter for a good few seconds.

They had such a good story with her and wanting to fight against the fact that they took her work and didn’t credit her and everyone was telling her to like take it bowing. Prasanth’s advice unfortunately checked out to me, because I’ve been told that all my life. My dad says it a lot and I know he doesn’t say it cause’ he doesn’t believe in me, but he loves me and wants my life to be easier and for me to succeed and his experience is that he’s had to deal with things like this and fighting won’t help. So yeah, what Prasanth said did not rub me the wrong way at all and I agreed with it and I’m fairly disappointed about that. I get that she got nervous and had cold feet about marriage but I do hope she and Prasanth can work this out through communication. Because I really don’t feel like Prasanth is the bad guy here. It’s just a miscommunication.

So yeah, a LOT of Kamala’s storyline continues to really hit me hard.

5. Nalini Vishwakumar

Nalini really had so much more screentime to blossom. I love that she has a good relationship with Mohan’s amma. It’s wonderful and I love it. Also I was shocked to see the house in Chennai. Like this house...in Chennai. The Chennai I’m used to and the Chennai they are used to are different Chennai’s. Basically wealth gap is crazy as hell and I was lowkey highkey confused if the actually shot this shit in Chennai. But props to the directors for putting some proper Tamil vibes in there. Like the scene where they kaala thottu kumbudurathu (touch the elder’s feet) before they leave for the US is so real and so vibes. I like that they decided to bring paati back. I was like hoping for it.

Also they really went at developing Nalini’s character as a workaholic mom who doesn’t get her daughter. That’s also a really common thing in Indian households with one working parent so I’m happy they portrayed that. I’m happy Nalini actually has a life outside her family portrayed and is still such a typical mother that it hits HARD. I love Nalini and she really developed as a character dealing with grief from Mohan’s death, the wish to move on with Dr.Jackson but knowing that she isn’t ready yet.

They gave her character a life and proper working outside Devi and it really has shown to develop her character and impact her relationship with Devi. The advice to “just say yes” works with cousins and younger siblings as well, I’ve heard it before and used it..and it saves so much time. Especially with small children.

(A memory I have is of my younger cousin going on and on about a princess and a castle and fighting a dragon and the witches and so much fantasy shit and ended with do you wanna come? I just clocked off my CCA’s and I had no energy left to question it so I just went yeah sure. Easiest decision, and 10/10 advice. )

6. Aneesa

I’m not gonna lie. I was skeptical of Aneesa and I didn’t like how Devi saw her in the trailer. But Aneesa reminds me so much of me....and its killing me.

Also the scene where she charms the hell out of Nalini and paati ma has literally happened to me before. Most of my Indian friends hate it..because I was raised with a lot more traditional manners with my grandparents so me and my siblings all are old fashioned which parents LOVE. And I really saw that Aneesa charming them and Devi also realizing, Damn none of my friends actually treat my family the way they should be treated, perks of having an Indian friend.

Also the scene where she gets Devi out of trouble is so so real. Because if you have one responsible friend that you parents trust, you could lie the hell to them, get you homie to back you up and it will work. Personal experience. So yeah, Aneesa character resonated with me a lot.

I also like that she wasn’t just a popular 1D Indian girl but she was genuinely cool and actually had proper issues and development where she gets more open to Sherman Oaks and actually kinda properly rebels against Noor, with having Ben as a boyfriend.

I feel like Aneesa has a lot more potential for growth, especially with the relationship with Ms Noor and Aneesa acting as a foil to Nalini and Devi’s. Also, I feel like Aneesa can grow within her social status at school as well and have Devi maturely handle it. Aneesa I feel will really really challenge Devi’s ability to be mature.

7. Eleanor and Fabiola’s plotlines

Okay like actually, major props to Ms Kaling man. This show touches so so many teen issues in one goddamn show. Emotionally manipulative relationships. So SO good. A lot of newer age relationships have a much more subtle and dangerous line of abuse that’s hard to find out. Like honestly it took me a while to see it as well and I realized oh fuck. oh fuck...I see it it’s bad. They really got the essence of Eleanor’s flamboyance matching with Malcom? (is it Malcolm..fuck it it’s Malcolm now) his “suaveness” and traditionally charming tendency. It made sense and it’s very realistic how Eleanor got played like a damn fiddle. I also again feel that the make up was faar to quick but I really appreciate that Eleanor got her own storyline with her step-mom and understanding of relationships instead of the show hyperfocusing on just Devi. I respect that a lot. Petition to get a Eleanor narration episode.

Fabiola’s storyline also was well taken. It’s an interesting added layer to the queer experience and how queerness can be expected to be performative and but really its all about being more of yourself. The idea that queer people don’t owe nobody anything or have to perform an ideal version of queerness and Fabiola struggling with that kinda hit. The part where they talked about her mother learning to support them and being Cricket? Queen/King. Like being trailblazers for the POC community and the LGBTQ+ community having overlapping struggles. Again, I liked that Fabiola was getting more personal screentime and less of her story revolving around Devi’s.

8. Everything else

I liked that there was more Tamil being casually thrown around. Like the Kamala vaadi to hold the suitcase down as they zipped it together was funny and relatable. The accents were really interesting because I promise you, I had no clue what they were saying sometimes. Nalini’s dialogues in Tamil were like immensely difficult to understand, and my Tamil is fluent. This isn’t a criticism... I’m fairly certain the difference is to do with the regional difference. American Tamil and Malaysian + rural Tamil slang are going to have huge accent differences so there’s no surprise that I found Nalini’s Tamil hard to understand.

I’m really really really meh about the Kamala and Manish/Mr Kulkarni thing. I still think she should sort it out with Prasanth maybe but I’m open to seeing where it goes. I might change my mind with it.

This show like any other show had its highs and lows. But I really really do feel that NHIE season 2 managed to truly figure out what the hell it wants to do and developed into a very strong and very entertaining show in terms of representation and diversity. I’m looking forward to season 3.

#nhie netflix #nhie season 2 #nhie s2 #nhie spoilers #nhie review #never have i ever #never have i ever season 2 #never have i ever spoilers #i have a lot of thoughts #bear with me here

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gunterfan1992 · 3 years

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Season One of “Adventure Time”: Short Episode Reviews

At the start of 2021, I had this idea to write up a book wherein I reviewed every episode of Adventure Time, condensing my thoughts down into a few paragraphs. It seemed easy enough at the time —I could knock a season out in a week, no prob, I thought — but it turns out it was quite the challenge. Part of this was the difficulty of boiling everything down into a few coherent paragraphs that didn’t just repeat the ideas that “This episode is wacky. This episode is bad.” (I was also dealing with untreated ADHD, so that probably didn’t help.) Even though it was a hurdle, I still got through seasons 1-4, and I thought I’d post my reviews here. Maybe one day I’ll do something with ‘em, but for now, enjoy!

Season 1, Episode 1. “Slumber Party Panic” (692-009)

Airdate: April 5, 2010

Production Information: Elizabeth Ito and Adam Muto (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Synopsis: Princess Bubblegum accidentally resurrects a violent mob of candy zombies, which leads to Finn doing the unthinkable: He breaks a royal promise to Bubblegum.

Commentary: It is always a delight to remind people that Adventure Time—a show that would go on to win a slew of prestigious awards and be lauded by critics as one of the smartest kids show that has ever been made—begins with Princess Bubblegum “add[ing] three more drops of explosive diarrhea” to a scientific mixture with which she hopes to bring the dead back to life. This elision of a macabre topic like the resurrection of the dead with a poop joke is in many ways emblematic of the sort of humor upon which Adventure Time was built, and while “Slumber Party Panic” might not be the season’s best episode, it does a solid job introducing the odd, madcap energy that would allow the show to flourish in its youth.

The plot to “Slumber Party Panic”—storyboarded by future series director Elizabeth Ito as well as eventual showrunner Adam Muto—was hammered out well before the show’s mythology was set in stone, and so some of the more hyperbolic plot points from this episode (e.g., the dramatic revelation that candy citizens explode when scared, or the fact that the Gumball Guardians are also the nigh-omnipotent Guardians of the Royal Promise, who can stop and reverse time itself) had to be ignored in later seasons. Nevertheless, the main characters’ personalities are all firmly established, allowing them to play off one another in a way that does not feel forced or misguided; Jeremy Shada and John DiMaggio, in particular, have excellent chemistry, breathing whimsical life into Finn and Jake right off the bat. All things considered, “Slumber Party Panic” is a fun entry and a solid preview of the silliness that was to come. (3.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 2. “Trouble in Lumpy Space” (692-015)

Airdate: April 5, 2010

Commentary: “Trouble in Lumpy Space” is a Ito-Muto production that introduces us to Lumpy Space Princess, the loquacious and dramatic drama queen who was destined to become one of the show’s breakout stars. A sentient blob of “irradiated stardust,” Lumpy Space Princess is an alien valley girl parody voiced by none other than series creator Pendleton Ward himself, and this episode does a commendable job illustrating the character’s immaturity and her ridiculously inflated sense of self-importance. This makes for good entertainment in and of it itself, but what really bumps this episode up a peg is the vocal delivery of the cast. Adventure Time always excelled when it came to its voice acting, but in this episode it is obvious that in this episode Jeremy Shada, John DiMaggio, and Pendleton Ward had extra fun playing around with their ridiculous “lumpy space” accents.

Aesthetically, this episode is quite the sensory experience. Lumpy Space itself is a hauntingly beautiful alien dimension of dark magenta skies and purple, pillowy clouds; it is a right shame that the show very rarely made use of this unique environment, considering how pleasant it is to look at. The episode’s soundtrack is also deserving of recognition, with much of the background music—especially the vapid pop tune that plays while Finn, Jake, and Lumpy Space Princess hitch a ride in Melissa’s car—recalling the elastic hyperpop that electro-wizzes from PC Music produce. The tunes add an extra dimension to the whole experience, helping to sell the idea that Lumpy Space is a silly but alien otherworld. (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 3. “Prisoners of Love” (692-005)

Airdate: April 12, 2010

Production Information: Adam Muto and Pendleton Ward (storyboard artists); Craig Lewis and Adam Muto (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: Ladies and gentlemen, meet the Ice King! Beginning the series as a cartoonishly incompetent antagonist, Ice King would grow into one of the show’s most well-developed characters. While “Prisoners of Love,” being the character’s debut episode, sees the Ice King still in his one-dimensional “wicked wizard” stage, there are hints even at this early juncture—like the character’s dramatic insistence to pluck out a yogurt chip from his trail mix, or his spasmodic attempts to play the drums—that the Ice King is more than just a textbook baddie. Is he evil? Judging by his actions, it often looks that way, but there is also a deep sadness to him that makes even his worst behavior somewhat pitiful.

But as pathetic as he may be, Ice King’s lecherous habit of kidnapping princesses is completely unacceptable (Princesses, Adventure Time would like to remind us, should never be married against their will), and by episode’s end, Ice King receives his just desserts—a feminist-fueled kick to the face, courtesy of Finn the Human. The moral of the story is clear: Poor old Ice King might just be lonely, but that does not excuse him for acting like a frost-bitten incel. (3.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 4. “Tree Trunks” (692-016)

Airdate: April 12, 2010

Production Information: Sean Jimenez and Bert Youn (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “Tree Trunks” introduces the audience to the eponymous character, voiced by Polly Lou Livingston, an eccentric octogenarian with a pronounced southern drawl whom Pendleton Ward knew growing up in Texas. Despite Tree Trunks appearing as a sweet old pachyderm, much of her dialog is riddled with double entendres and subtle sex jokes that go over the heads of children, and as such, she is something of a divisive character in the Adventure Time fandom: While some viewers find her hilarious, others find her decidedly off-putting. In this episode, however, storyboard artists Sean Jimenez and Bert Youn strike a decent balance between the character’s funny and creepy sides (case in point: The scene wherein Tree Trunks, in the gawdiest of makeup, tries to seduce an evil monster with her “womanly charms and elephant prowess”). The major exception to this overall balance is the episode’s decidedly morbid conclusion, which features Tree Trunks exploding after tasting the crystal apple. This was perhaps the show’s first non sequitur ending, and almost certainly left an indelible imprint on the minds of viewers young and old alike. (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 5. “The Enchiridion!” (692-001)

Airdate: April 19, 2010

Production Information: Patrick McHale, Adam Muto, and Pendleton Ward (storyboard artists and story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: According to the annals of cartoon history, the initial storyboard for “The Enchiridion” was whipped up by Ward and his crew members to prove to Cartoon Network that Adventure Time could be developed into a full-fledged series. This was almost certainly a stressful task, which necessitated that Ward et al. dissect the pilot, determine what elements worked, and then infuse those elements into a new storyboard. As a result of this “open art transplant,” there are quite a few analogs between the pilot and “The Enchiridion!”—e.g., the wacky dancing, the dream sequences, the ridiculous language—but this episode does a solid job of emulating the style of the pilot without wholesale duplicating it.

In terms of plot, “The Enchiridion!” is a fairly predictable adventure story, but it is one with enough clever variations that prevent the whole affair from dragging or being too boring; standout scenes include Finn and Jake having to deal with granny-zapping gnomes, and the D&D-inspired reverie in which Finn is tempted to slay an “unaligned” ant. The episode is further buoyed by several fun guest stars (including Mark Hamill, Fred Tatasciore, and even Black Flag’s Henry Rollins) that sprinkle a little additional energy on top of the whole thing. Given the exuberant fun of the episode and the way it easily introduces us to supporting characters like Princess Bubblegum, it is intriguing why the producers did not choose “The Enchiridion!” as the series premiere. That question aside, “The Enchiridion!” is one of the season’s stronger episode and an excellent place to start if you want a crash course in what made early Adventure Time so unique. (4 stars)

Season 1, Episode 6. “The Jiggler” (692-011)

Airdate: April 19, 2010

Production Information: Luther McLaurin and Armen Mirzaian (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “The Jiggler” opens on a fun, hyperactive note, with Finn singing “Baby,” a catchy song coated in layer upon layer of sweet, crisp autotune. But soon after Finn and Jake discover and “adopt” the titular creature, the affair quickly devolves into a cartoonish snuff film of two dullards accidentally torturing a wild animal; the whole thing is made worse by the high volume of bodily fluids excreted by the Jiggler. Thankfully, Finn and Jake are able to return the Jiggler to its mother before it keels over, but this victory is undermined given that the whole situation was Finn and Jake’s fault to begin with. Perhaps it is best to view all of this as a cautionary tale: No matter how cute a wild animal may look, you probably should not take it home and make it dance for you. (2 stars)

Season 1, Episode 7. “Ricardio the Heart Guy” (692-007)

Airdate: April 26, 2010

Production Information: Sean Jimenez and Bert Youn (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon, Adam Muto, and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “Ricardio the Heart Guy” introduces the titular villain, the brainy-but-sleazy heart of the Ice King voiced to perfection by the sonorous George Takei. Given how arrogant the character acts even before his true intentions are revealed, it is not much of a shock that Ricardio is a rotten egg, and this lack of mystery drags the whole episode down to some degree. Nevertheless, Takei’s histronic performance injects into the episode a funny sort of melodrama, with is further reinforced by Casey James Basichis’s sparklingly dark score, which mixes in elements of opera alongside the usual chiptune blips and bloops to emphasize Ricardio’s pretentiousness. (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 8. “Business Time” (692-014)

Airdate: April 26, 2010

Commentary: On the surface, “Business Time” is but a silly parody of corporate culture that sees Finn and Jake become the veritable CEOs of an adventuring firm. It is a silly little set up, and the show has good fun poking fun at business-speak and the deleterious effects of rampant corporatization. At the same time, by relegating Finn and Jake to the sidelines near the middle of the episode, “Business Time” does itself a disservice by focusing not on the wacky shenanigans of the business men, but rather on the mundanity of Finn and Jake’s “managerial life.” It all comes together in the end, when Finn and Jake are forced to jump into the fray and destroy the Business Men’s vacuum robot, but the noticeable lag there in the middle of everything throws the pacing of the episode off.

But while “Business Time” might not be the strongest first-season entry, it has gained respect in the fandom for being the first episode to underline that the Land of Ooo exists in the far future after some sort of nuclear holocaust. In an interview with USA Today, Ward explained that this was a natural development that he had never planned: “[When] we did [the] episode about businessmen rising up from an iceberg at the bottom of a lake … that made the world post-apocalyptic, and we just ran with it” (X). Considering how major the post-apocalyptic trappings would become to the show’s mythology, it is a bit startling to learn that it was added in on a whim. Regardless, it was an inspired choice that added a tinge of sadness to the story of Finn and Jake. They were not just frolicking in some fantasy world; they were frolicking in the ruins of our world, long after nuclear war had devasted the planet. Is it bleak? Absolutely! But this bleakness contrasts nicely with Adventure Time’s colorful surface, resulting in a deeply rich ambivalence. Not many shows—let alone children’s shows!—have managed to fuse such extremes into a workable whole. (3.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 9. “My Two Favorite People” (692-004)

Airdate: May 3, 2010

Production Information: Kent Osborne and Pendleton Ward (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: Almost all the first-season episodes that we have considered so far have placed a heavy emphasis on comedy. The point of these episodes is to make you laugh, and anything beyond that is gravy. “My Two Favorite People,” in contrast, may be the first that is grounded on a solidly emotional foundation, and while the episode is very funny, it is primarily interested in telling the poignant story of two brothers and a gal they both like. If anyone has ever found themselves caught up in a love triangle—whether real or, as in the case of this episode, imagined—Jake’s actions, although immature, will likely feel relatable. It is a cheesy cliché, but the story’s strength is that it all feels so real (which I recognize is a funny thing to say about a cartoon dog and his unicorn-rainbow beau).

“My Two Favorite People” is the first episode that really features Lady Rainicorn as a mover of the plot rather than just a fun side character, and it is a wonderful showcase for her. While a handful of later installments—namely season four’s “Lady & Peebles” and season eighth’s “Lady Raincorn of the Crystal Dimension”—would try to highlight Lady, “My Two Favorite People” is arguably the character’s funniest episodes, thanks in large part to her use of a universal translator, which allows the other characters to understand her. To some, a device such as this may seem like a cop-out, but storyboard artists Kent Osborne and Pendleton Ward cleverly preempt this criticism by making the device’s only useable setting one that gives Lady the voice of a great-great grandfather. Lady’s “old-man voice” is an episode highlight, and it makes many of the character’s lines (e.g., “Come on my darling! Wrap your legs around me!”) both hilarious and unsettling. (4 stars)

Season 1, Episode 10. “Memories of Boom Boom Mountain” (692-010)

Airdate: May 3, 2010

Commentary: During the production of season one Ward exerted considerable effort trying to shepherd the show’s crew in a coherent direction, all the while responding to critiques levelled by dozens of Cartoon Network executives. Many of these critiques were contradictory, and in the process of creating something that he was proud of while also appeasing everyone around him, Ward very nearly went bananas. The experience provided the bedrock for “Memories of Boom Boom Mountain,” and to anyone who has been given the arduous task of pleasing a whole slew of prickly critics, the episode will be immediately relatable.

In terms of the show’s budding mythology, “Memories of Boom Boom Mountain” is notable because it firmly establishes that Finn was adopted as a baby by Jake’s canine parents, Joshua and Margaret. This plot point was likely guided less by worldbuilding and more by humor (perhaps playing on the whole “raised by wolves” idiom). Nevertheless, this decision would have major ramifications for the show’s overarching narrative. Finn’s nature as the only human in Ooo was no longer a silly afterthought—it was now a mystery. Just who is Finn the Human, and where did he come from? These questions would linger for seasons, finally culminating in season eight’s touching miniseries Islands. (4 stars)

Season 1, Episode 11. “Wizard” (692-020)

Airdate: May 10, 2010

Production Information: Pete Browngardt, Adam Muto, and Bert Youn (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “Wizard”—co-storyboarded by Pete Browngardt, an artist who storyboarded on Chowder and The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack before creating the divisive Uncle Grandpa for Cartoon Network—is an absolute bonkers installment that throws logic out the window by giving Finn and Jake magical powers. It is a plot setup almost guaranteed to be fun, and you can tell that the writers likely a good time coming up with increasingly asinine magical powers (e.g., “endless mayonnaise”).

But underneath all the distraught dust motes and captivating new hairstyles, “Wizard” also has a degree of depth, reading like a biting commentary on higher education-industrial complex in the United States. It does not seem coincidental that the strategies employ by Bufo’s scam wizard school are strikingly similar to those used by predatory colleges, which offer students a worthless degree alongside thousands of dollars of debt. The parallels are made stronger when it is revealed that all those whom Bufo has tricked are reluctant to upset the oppressive status quo, because they believe “newfangled thinking will get [everyone] killed”; this eerily mirrors those who downplay the student loan crisis, arguing that “that’s just the system works.” Finn will have none of this, however, and by episode’s end, he—channeling his myriad wizard powers and the vigor of “youth culture”—proves that if a system is broke, it has got to go. Maybe we could learn a thing or two from that. (4 stars)

Season 1, Episode 12. “Evicted!” (692-003)

Airdate: May 17, 2010

Production Information: Sean Jimenez and Bert Youn (storyboard artists); Adam Muto (story writer); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “Evicted!” is considered a classic by most Adventure Time fans for one simple reason: It introduces the audience to Marceline the Vampire Queen. This iconic undead rocker chick managed to steal the spotlight whenever she appeared in an episode, and eventually she became one of the show’s more well-regarded characters. Given all this, there is some irony to the fact that in her debut, Marceline is the antagonist who steals our heroic duo’s beloved Tree Fort. Marceline is therefore similar to other season one baddies in that she tests Finn and Jake’s patience before engaging them in direct combat. But Marceline is set apart from other foes in how Finn and Jake defeat her—namely, that they do not. In fact, she pounds them into the ground almost effortlessly! Besting Finn and Jake is no easy task, meaning that while “Evicted!” might showcase Marceline’s nastier side, it nevertheless does an excellent job emphasizing how much of a badass she is; this goes a long way in explaining the character’s huge popularity.

But Marceline alone cannot an episode make. Luckily, “Evicted!” is further bolstered by several excellent design choices, including a bevy of fun background critters whipped up by character designer Tom Herpich, a slew of colorful background designs courtesy of Ghostshrimp and Santino Lascano, and a killer soundtrack. Regarding the latter, the stand-out tune is inarguably “House Hunting Song,” a comically overblown ballad detailing Finn and Jake’s arduous quest to find a new place to live. The song, sung mostly by Ward with a few lines delivered by Olson, is an emotion-laden earworm guaranteed to wiggle its way into your brain. (I mean, how can you not love a song that blames the murderous tendencies of vampires on simply being “burnt out on dealing with mortals”?) It very much is the blood-red cherry on top of everything, which helps to make “Evicted!” one of the season’s strongest episodes. (5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 13. “City of Thieves” (692-012)

Airdate: May 24, 2010

Commentary: “City of Thieves” is a workable if somewhat forgettable mid-season entry. The episode’s main strength is its titular setting, a bizarro municipality where theft is the law of the land. Unfortunately, the city is nothing more than a silly plot device, and the episode itself never really rises above “fine.” (2.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 14. “The Witch’s Garden” (692-022)

Airdate: June 7, 2010

Production Information: Adam Muto, Kent Osborne, and Niki Yang (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: If you think the idea of Jake sassing Ooo’s cattiest witch is funny in and of itself, wait until you see this episode’s visuals. From Jake’s grotesque but silly “manbaby body” to the abject horror of Gary the Mermaid Queen, “The Witch’s Garden” is replete with several memorable character designs that make it a satisfying entry. (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 15. “What Is Life?” (692-017)

Airdate: June 14, 2010

Commentary: Giving Finn and Ice King a son is not a move that I thought Adventure Time would ever make, let alone in the first season, but here we are. The bouncing baby boy in question is actually a clunky robot named NEPTR, voiced to sadsack perfection by comedian and musician Andy Milonakis. If you had told me prior to this episode that Milonakis could give a sentient microwave a sense of pathos, I would have never believed you, but in “What Is Life?” he does a commendable job conveying NEPTR’s pitiful nature. As for the episode itself, “What Is Life?” is a solid entry that introduces viewers to several recurring characters (one of whom being Gunter the penguin) while offering us a peek into the Ice King’s sad, lonely mind. (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 16. “Ocean of Fear” (692-025)

Airdate: June 21, 2010

Production Information: J. G. Quintel and Cole Sanchez (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “Oceans of Fear”—storyboarded by Cole Sanchez and J. G. Quintel, the latter of whom would go on to create Regular Show for Cartoon Network—is in an interesting installment that establishes Finn’s fear of the ocean, reminding the viewer that even great heroes will be forced to deal with irrational phobias at some point in their life. The character designs in this episode are quite amusing (with the standout being Finn’s grotesque “fear of the Ocean” face), and Mark Hamill, as always, does a wonderful job, using his trademark “Joker voice” to give the Fear Feaster a delightful air of villainy. But as with “Business Time,” many of these elements are upstaged by the episodes’ post-apocalyptic trappings. In fact, when I watched the episode for the first time, I paused it in several places, asking to myself, “Is that a wrecked battleship? Is that a bombed-out tank? Why are there ruins of a city underwater?” It is an understatement to say that this episode is positively littered with rusted debris and centuries-old detritus that testifies to Ooo’s traumatic history. For eagle-eyed fans hoping to piece together Adventure Time’s mysterious mythology, this episode is an absolute hoot. (3.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 17. “When Wedding Bells Thaw” (692-013)

Airdate: June 28, 2010

Production Information: Kent Osborne and Niki Yang (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: One of the first episodes to team Ice King up with Finn and Jake, “When Wedding Bells Thaw” is a goofy lampooning of bachelor parties and the institution of marriage in general. Although the episode ends on a fairly predictive note (spoiler alert: Ice King tricked his fiancée into marriage), seeing Ice King get along with our heroes is charming, and in many ways it presages the Ice King’s future character growth. The episode’s strongest part is the short dialogue-free montage near the middle depicting Finn, Jake, and Ice King getting into all sorts of “manlorette party” shenanigans; this sequence is made all the stronger by Tim Kiefer’s chiptune score, which enlivens the party with a burst of synthesizers and electro-drums. (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 18. “Dungeon” (692-013)

Airdate: June 28, 2010

Commentary: If there is one episode that feels like the entirety of Adventure Time’s first season distilled down into 11 minutes, then it would be “Dungeon.” An episode replete with outrageous monsters and wacky action, “Dungeon” is a high-energy installment that pays homage to the sprawling world of table-top gaming; indeed, it is not hard to imagine storyboard artists Elizabeth Ito and Adam Muto reaching for a D20 or a well-worn copy of the Monster Manual whenever it came time to block out a new scene. Stand-out moments from this episode include Finn’s encounter with the Demon Cat (famous for having “approximate knowledge of many things”), his visitation by a “guardian angel,” and the deus ex machina ending that see Princess Bubblegum swoop in to save the day. (“Get on my swan!”) And amidst all the silliness, “Dungeon” even manages to sneak in a sweet little message tucked snuggly in between all the wacky monsters about the importance of recognizing your weaknesses. (4.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 19. “The Duke” (692-023)

Airdate: July 12, 2010

Commentary: For most of season one, the audience is presented a version of Princess Bubblegum that is bright, effervescent, and totally nonthreatening; the monarch, it seems, is as aggressive as a marshmallow. But in “The Duke,” this all changes, and we finally get to see the princess’s darker, authoritarian side. Unhinged Princess Bubblegum is quite a sight to behold (as is the sight of green-and-bald Bubblegum), but it adds another layer of to the saccharine sovereign, setting her up for substantial character development a few seasons down the road. (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 20. “Freak City” (692-008)

Airdate: July 26, 2010

Production Information: Tom Herpich and Pendleton Ward (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “Freak City” introduces the audience to Magic Man, a deranged and flamboyant Martian wizard known for meaninglessly harassing the citizens of Ooo. Although the character’s backstory would be fleshed out in later seasons and eventually come to play a major part in the mythology of the series, this episode was storyboarded well before these developments were dreamed up, meaning that here, Magic Man functions as a simple (albeit funny) villain-of-the-week whose nihilistic tendencies clash wonderfully with Finn’s optimistic worldview. Finn is so used to dividing the world up into “good guys” and “evil guys,” but his run-in with Magic Man is proof that morality is far more confusing than he would like to believe. The main problem is that Magic Man is not really evil: He is clinically insane—a violent psychopath—who does not care about his actions impacting others. No climactic fight or eleventh-hour pep talk is enough to fix him.

On top of this rather weighty consideration of morality and mental instability, “Freak City” contains another, more straightforward message about the power of teamwork and how people should work as one to overcome common problems. Storyboard artists Pendleton Ward and Tom Herpich have quite a bit of fun taking the idiom literally by forcing Finn and the other denizens of Freak City pile on top of one another to function as a single, grotesque being that is capable of fighting Magic Man. While “Freak City” loses some points for espousing rhetoric that folks who are depressed can simply will themselves out of their funk, it makes up for these deficits elsewhere with its character designs—ranging from the inside-out bird to the two-headed monster that Finn groin-strikes—which are all bizarre in the best, most creative way possible. (3.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 21. “Donny” (692-018)

Airdate: August 9, 2010

Commentary: A rather forgettable protagonist and only a smattering of memorable lines make “Donny” the season’s weakest link. The episode does get points for introducing us to “whywolves” (“Creatures possessed by the spirit of inquiry—and bloodlust!”), but they are not enough to completely save it from mediocrity. (2 stars)

Season 1, Episode 22. “Henchman” (692-021)

Airdate: August 23, 2010

Production Information: Luther McLaurin and Cole Sanchez (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: While “Evicted!” depicted Marceline as an apathetic asshole, “Henchman” starts to soften the vampire queen by showing that her evil exterior is an elaborate facade, and that deep down she is really just a prank-loving trickster—or, as Finn puts it, “a radical dame who likes to play games.” This might seem nothing more than a subtle tweak, but it does wonders for Marceline’s characterization; by episode’s end, as Finn and his vampiric “master” chat quite cheerfully in a field of strawberries, it is clear that the writers are setting up Marceline to become a legitimate pal to Finn and Jake, rather than just an avatar of chaos who drops in every once in awhile to shake things up. This was a wise decision, as it provided Marceline with the chance to grow into a hero in her own right with whom the audience can happily cheer along.

Since “Henchman” is predicated on Marceline pranking Finn, storyboard artists Luther McLaurin and Cole Sanchez have a great deal of fun mocking up outrageous scenarios that seem evil at first glance, but are revealed to be quite benign. Perhaps the funniest of these situations is Marceline raising an army of undead skeletons only to throw them a concert, and the vampire queen’s demand that Finn kill a little dimple-plant, which looks like a cutie before it turns into an Audrey II-esque abomination from John Carpenter’s darkest nightmares. (4 stars)

Season 1, Episode 23. “Rainy Day Daydream” (692-002)

Airdate: September 6, 2010

Production Information: Pendleton Ward (storyboard artist); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: “Rainy Day Daydream” is a beautiful representation of creativity in its purest form. Channeling his love of multilevel video games and Dungeons and Dragons, solo storyboard artist and series creator Pendleton Ward uses the pretext of Jake’s imagination affecting reality as an opportunity to bounce from one ridiculous plot point to another to great effect. The whole thing feels like an exercise in jovial spontaneity, and while “writing the story as you go” can sometime result in disjointed or sloppy final products, here Ward makes it work, using the approach to illustrate the almost limitless potential of imagination. Another strength of the episode is the way it throws dozens of ridiculous obstacles at Finn and Jake without the aid of equally ridiculous visuals; in fact, almost every hindrance in the episode is invisible to both Finn and the audience, and we only learn what is going on thanks to Jake’s narration. The fact that this approach works and is not boring is a testament to Ward’s skills as a storyteller and dialogue writer. (4.5 stars)

Season 1, Episode 24. “What Have You Done?” (692-027)

Airdate: September 13, 2010

Commentary: In addition to providing us with another glimpse of Bubblegum’s dark side, “What Have You Done?” also serves as an interesting meditation on morality and preemptive punishment. As earlier episodes have confirmed, the Ice King is a creepy little deviant, but is it right for Finn and Jake to imprison him without a cause? This is a real legal question, and the show handles it in a surprisingly sophisticated way, concluding more or less that the writ of habeas corpus must be preserved. Of course, this is all undermined to some degree when we learn that the Ice King actually is to blame, but thanks to some quick thinking on the part of Finn, our heroes are able to save the day without having to turn to the carceral powers of the state. (And people say Adventure Time is not sophisticated...) (3 stars)

Season 1, Episode 25. “His Hero” (692-026)

Airdate: September 20, 2010

Commentary: Who is the greatest hero ever? If you answered, “Finn!” it is obvious that you have yet to see “His Hero,” for the correct answer is Billy, of course! Lou Ferrigno guest stars in this episode as the aforementioned defender of Ooo, enlivening the character with his distinctive voice. As for the episode itself, storyboard artists Kent Osborne and Niki Yang—with an assist from the ever-dependable Adam Muto—produce some of their best work this season, filling each scene with witty dialogue and zany shenanigans. Arguably, the episode’s pièce de resistance is the short montage of Billy’s past achievements, which plays alongside a song, sung by Muto, extolling the hero’s greatness; energetic and wacky, the song in many ways typifies the “chaotic heroism” that defined the show’s first season.

Like many other first-season episodes, “His Hero” ends with a counterintuitive “anti-moral,” stressing that while a commitment to non-violence might seem subversive on the surface, it is actually an ineffective way to make the world a better place; instead, the episode argues that direct physical action—i.e., beating the snot out of monsters and bad guys—is necessary if heroes want to save people from oppression. This may all come across as contrarian silliness, but I would argue that it is profoundly radical, rejecting “common sense” ideals about peace that really only help those in positions of power. (Side note, if the kids who grew up watching Adventure Time turn into a bunch of revolutionaries, I think we will know the cause.) (4 stars)

Season 1, Episode 26. “Gut Grinder” (692-024)

Airdate: September 27, 2010

Production Information: Ako Castuera and Bert Youn (storyboard artists); Tim McKeon and Merriwether Williams (story writers); Larry Leichliter (director), Patrick McHale (creative director), Nick Jennings (art director)

Commentary: Much like “Ricardio the Heart Guy,” this episode suffers due to a lack of a solid mystery; from the start, it seems obvious that Jake is not the one responsible for the robberies. Furthermore, the reveal that Sharon is the one behind the robberies comes with almost no dramatical weight, since we have no idea who she is. The whole thing is forgettable, which is a shame given that this is the season finale. (2 stars)

(Huge shout out to @sometipsygnostalgic for reading over these a few months ago and offering feedback. Also, I want to thank @j4gm for posting his “Slumber Party Panic” review, which made me remember these write-ups!)

#adventure time #atimers #season 1 #season one #reviews #finn #jake #finn the human #jake the dog #marceline #pb #bubblegum #princess bubblegum #marceline the vampire queen #ice king #pen ward #pendleton ward

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readerinsertfanfiction · 3 years

Text

Dear Penpal,

Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia

Character: Shigaraki Tomura / Tenko Shimura

Prompt: Childhood friends to enemies

A/N: It has been much too long. Hello.

Masterlist

Tenko, I think I made a grave mistake…

As with most stories this one hit you out of nowhere. Feeling your body slam into the wall you groaned, the buzz of the alcohol leaving your body as you were now fighting the stars that you were seeing, finding that the dim lightening of the alley was of precious little help as you tried to fight your aggressor.

“Your wallet. Now,” the attacker commanded and somewhere you instinctively reached out to the pocket in which you carried it before retreating, another groan escaping you as you were pushed further up against the wall, your breath choking.

“Haven’t I made myself clear enough?” the voice continued to whisper. It was muffled behind the mask, distorted even, telling you that they had prepared themselves well. Along with the way they had you locked in, it were the signs of an experienced robber and you cursed your luck.

A small-time criminal and yet here you were, struggling despite all of the ‘basic’ training you had gone through to be able to work together with the heroes without being a liability. Lessons on which you drew a blank now that you were actually faced with the thing that seemed so far away for someone as simple as you.

Just a simple turn of the corner. You had just exited out of the bar, waving off Kuro’s concerns for your safety and here you were. Locked in the arms of a petty crime that was trying to pry you off your wallet. A wallet that wasn’t worth much now after spending your night in a bar, but it was worth something to you and there was a pride you felt you needed to uphold.

“Well, what is it going to be?”

The voice was getting impatient as the hold on you shook, as if trying to intimidate you further into giving into the demands made. Wincing you tried to fight back, but found that your chances for that were diminishing as a second figure joined you in the alley.

“Pathetic,” the new figure speaks and squinting against the bright backlight that comes from the main street you vaguely make out a slumped and hooded figure, somewhat reminiscent but yet you didn’t dare to hope as the figure approaches you so leisurely, hands in his pockets and the general body language screaming; apathy.

“Call the police,” you manage to croak out anyway and the figure freezes, pausing in their approach before the body shakes and a low rumble escapes, a sardonic laugh follows and to your horror you recognise it as it belonging to T.S.

“They won’t come, dumbass. They never do. Neither will your precious heroes come,” he speaks slowly as he approaches and you aggressor holds on tighter against you, earning a wince from your lips as they pull you back further into the alley.

“If you know, bugger off,” they try to threaten, but it falls on deafman’s ears as T.S. approaches closer, hands still hidden away, but the unmistakable glint of anger in his eyes seem to glow as he eyes your robber, a dangerous air radiating off him.

“What did ya say, scum?” T.S. speaks slowly, but you can tell the growl he has as his hand reaches for the back of his neck, scratching the skin there once more. It fills the alley with the ominous sound of scabs coming loose and nails going across dry skin. You hear your captor gulp as they let go of you, backing off as they raise their arms into the air.

“Look, we don’t have to fight. I can give you half of what this brat has in the wallet,” your attacker negotiates and T.S. scoffs, ignoring you entirely as he steps closer to the other.

“Pathetic,” T.S. simply repeats once more.

It was the first time you had ever seen T.S. touch something with all five fingers of his hand. Where he always carefully made sure to keep one finger lifted you watched how the man shoved a complete hand into the face of your attacker and the consequences that followed as the skin brittled away and the person disintegrated before he could even as much as scream.

You didn’t need to wait for adrenaline to fade away, or another reality check of the location you were in to reach your next conclusion. The quirk you had witnessed fit the description perfectly of the S-ranked villain you had been investigating with the rest of the team. A sense of horror and dread sank in as you slowly realised how T.S., no Shigaraki had known who you were all this while, but you had no clue as you had fraternised with them, drank together and even spent time as friends.

His earlier hostility had been reasonable, it deigned upon you.

“Even someone as stupid as you are should have figured out who I’m by now,” Shigaraki speaks, finally pulling off his hoodie as he faces you. The scratched upon skin, the scabs that never healed, the red hostile eyes and the split lips. Unconsciously you held your breath as you faced the villain you were supposed to fight from the safe confines of your office, not meet on the street after a good night’s drink. Not like this.

Shigaraki scoffs at your reaction, his eye rolling as he reaches out for you, uncaring of the way you flinch, apathetic for the way you tremble as four fingers wrap around your wrist and yank you up.

“Go, go tell everyone that it was me who saved you from this shitplace.” His voice is harsh and his words are hissed as he talks down on you, pulling you closer ominously as he stares you down. “See what shitty hero will believe you. I guarantee you there will be none. Not even one that you can share a drink with,” he says and the dread and fear and anxiety inside of you morph and mix as you know that he is speaking the truth.

Tenko, I drank with Tomura Shigaraki. Of all people.

#shigaraki tomura #shigaraki x reader #bnha shigaraki #mha shigaraki #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #dear penpal

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thelavendercrows · 3 years

Text

My Review of Netflix’s Shadow and Bone! (show-only watchers beware, I spoil minor stuff about the books)

So! Shadow and Bone came out - og book fans will know it depicts the story of the first instalment of the Shadow and Bone trilogy, along with new unseen prequel content for Six of Crows. Some things are intentionally shifted around, especially in terms of timeline and who meets who, but if I had to quickly summarise my thoughts: THAT WAS SO GOOD! Sorry in advance if this review is absolutely incomprehensible!!!

Part 1: Characters

Alina - making her more assuredly half-Shu seemed to work, though I can’t speak on the topic as I am a pasty bitch. Otherwise, Alina remained largely the same and I’m here for it - she was already a pretty interesting protagonist imo. Nothing but love for Jessie’s performance, I loved seeing Alina’s growing confidence though I wish there were more training scenes.

Mal - they made him so much more interesting. Archie brought a lot to the character, and even though seeing Mal get fucked up every episode was a tad repetitive, I think it made him far more sympathetic and actually showed us that awful suffering he mentioned in the first book. Seeing his close friends die was just an incredibly powerful scene, and Malina feels a lot stronger with Mal being a more rounded character.

The Darkling - just because I dislike Darklina doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy the Darkling as a character. While I dislike that he revealed his true name so casually, that he and Alina seemed to fall for each other so quickly (I liked it better in the book because she had more training scenes, indicating more time had passed for their relationship to develop), and that they removed “the problem with wanting is that it makes us weak” line, I do enjoy Ben’s portrayal of the character. He was rendered a little pathetic by the Crows, but I do love the Crows so I’ll excuse it. Where his character really shined is with the flashback scenes and his interactions with Baghra. I’m very interested to see what they do with him next.

Kaz - a lot of people have said Kaz is a lot softer than we’re used to. I agree, but it makes sense. Kaz was that mean but well meaning leader at the start of Six of Crows - he was only made harsher as he was forced to confront his traumas, and go on a difficult heist. Also, I think it gives a bit of context to why he and Inej end up having feelings for each other. We know in the books that they worked closely together for a long time, but actually seeing those moments makes all the difference. Freddy did an amazing job showing Kaz’s rough exterior battling his inner demons.

Inej - amazing, 10/10, can’t applaud Amita enough. I’m not sure about the choice to give Inej a brother? It could cause more grief later but it’s another weirdly jarring difference from the book. However! Inej was done perfectly in the show in my opinion. We see her stealth, knife and acrobatic skills, we see her initial horror at taking her first kill (amazing scene) and her motivations and religious beliefs are not ignored in favour of pairing her off with Kaz immediately. I do wish they kept Kaz gifting her that knife instead of Alina though. I always wanted to see that scene.

Jesper - DID YOU MEAN STAR OF THE GOD DAMN SHOW? Normally a comedic relief character has me rolling my eyes, but it makes all the difference that Jesper actually has troubles and flaws and motivations and HILARIOUS DIALOGUE. I love him. Kit Young did such a good job, he played Jesper perfectly and I also love the foreshadowing of Wylan’s appearance! Love love love Jesper. A+. Also he is bisexual look at him go!!! Representation!!!

Others: NINA AND MATTHIAS ARE AMAZING!!! ENEMIES TO LOVERS A+ EVEN IF THE TIMELINE IS ALL WEIRD. David and Genya. My loves. Perfect. A+ as well. Nadia, amazing. Very gay. Not sure why they killed Marie off like that. Pekka is scary but why did they make him kinda hot? Milo is my hero. I would die for Fedyor. ZOYA?? That is not my Zoya. Why did they make her say something racist to Alina when she herself is mixed race. Zoya would never. But all the actors did a great job even if the characters were a little different.

Part 2: Plot

The rest of these parts should be shorter. So, the plot is mostly the same in terms of Shadow and Bone, but the stuff for the crows is all new and some parts of the story were changed to include them. While the crows on their own were amazing, I think the parts where they interacted with the Shadow and Bone cast felt forced and added some good moments at best, or actively damaged other characters at worst. For instance, Inej witnessing Alina was amazing. But Kaz outsmarting the Darkling, while it made sense, just lessened the Darkling as a threat. Otherwise I think everything was really good! The new Crows stuff was brilliant on its own, even if Nina and Matthias’ story was moved forward I still adored it, and Shadow and Bone stayed loyal enough to the books in terms of plot to remain engaging.

Part 3: Worldbuilding

My main concern about the show was how they would handle the language differences, but they did a great job. Like, they had Fjerdans speak in their own language, they made a new alphabet for Ravkan? I think they know what they’re doing. Seeing the Crows and the Shadow and Bone cast communicate in the same language didn’t really make sense but that’s just a nitpick.

Also, all the settings look amazing. Not much to say, they’re just great.

Part 4: Effects

Music, perfect, visuals, great (the volcras look amazing but Alina’s light power looked a little...fake), costume design and props, best I’ve ever seen. Enough said.

Part 5: Final thoughts

When a book is adapted into a show or film, I usually just assume that it will serve its purpose, maybe be a little frustrating or terrible at worst, and go. Shadow and Bone though, it adapts the books faithfully while still including worthwhile changes. It isn’t perfect, but it comes close. I imagine show-only watchers will like it a lot.

Alternative take: Jesper and Milo carried the whole thing. Goodbye.

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radbutsafe · 3 years

Note

ALL FUCKIN 35 OF THEM SKLNWESDJFPXO

I SHOULDVE EXPECTED THIS FROM YOU

1. From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing? (No downplaying yourself!)

A three! I think I’m mid range cause I ain’t terrible but there is still shit I gotta improve and grow in my writing

2. Why do you write fanfiction?

to manifest what canon won’t give me and to write more! (though yes it is mainly about the smooching and the— I’ll stop there LOL)

3. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?

Hm! My weird research details? I’m that “fun fact, did you know...” in my fics sometimes LOL! I plan on giving a penthouse for erina in a fic and I went through penthouse listings in Japan for floor layouts and locations💀 my research gives me inspo and depth to stuff I think I lack in comparison to others sometimes.

4. Are there any writers that inspire you?

In terms of fellow fic writers, one of them I can’t name here but she’s an inspiration with her exceptional gift for prose period and her lovely skill at comedy! I want to be as funny as her when I write, I love her ironic situational humor. Other fic writers are @takoyakitenchou, @royaldragonsevgisi15 who I always love sharing ideas with and motivate me to create more! For non-fic writers it would be V.E. Schwab, Leigh Bardugo, Oda, and Horikoshi! The last two may be mangaka, however they are writers as well to create their stories! The depth these creators have given their worlds and interesting characters theyve given life to are all what I aspire to be like!

5. What’s the fic you’re most proud of?

so far uh?? hm everything I’m currently writing are wips lol!! im proud of my wip that has been nicknamed ‘soma panics’ that is a multi-chapter fic that spans like probs 20 plus chapters maybe

6. What element of writing do you find comes easily?

dialogue! it’s so much fun! and character thoughts. I’ve said to people I may be better suited for script writing

7. What element of writing do you struggle with most?

I think it’s description, of like setting and showing action. also an expansion of my vocabulary LOL

8. Which character(s) do you find easiest to write?

erina! I think it’s because canon has shown us many of her different faces and range of emotion.

9. Which character(s) do you find most difficult to write?

SOMA!! chill ass mofo whos more carefree compared to the common shonen protagonist! for other shokugeki characters I’m not sure just yet because I haven’t flexed my fingers enough for the rest of them.

10. What’s your favorite genre to write for?

I guess I should say romance cause that’s what I mostly write LOL!

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?

sorina and I try to get them to smooch eventually KEK and yeah it’s..usually romantic fluff lmao

12. Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about.

HONESTLY ALL OF THEM but “soma panics” is my brain child

13. First fandom you ever wrote for?

pretty sure it’s digimon....

14. What’s your favorite fandom to write for?

currently shokugeki no soma!!!!

15. What’s the weirdest fandom you’ve ever written for?

uhhhh I guess SNS? LMAO fandoms...all have their quirks to them.

16. Any guilty pleasure trope(s)?

characters cuddling!!!! or getting the urge to smooch!!!!

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

unrequited love GOOD FUCKIN BYEEEEEE

18. Wildest fic you’ve ever written?

I have plot ideas thst can be wild potentially but so far nothing fits this criteria so far that I actually have written.

19. Do you prefer canon-compliant, AUs, or something in-between?

depends on the fandom, but if written well, all of it!

20. Gen fic or shippy stuff?

shippy 100% like I said I like smoochin

21. Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!)

romantic is...*drumroll* SORINA! platonic, soutaku and erina and alice!

22. Do you listen to anything while you write?

Sometimes! There are times songs will be on loop and times I just shuffle a playlist. and if I’m writing in random bursts it’ll be with no music but it really does depend lmao I think music is when I’m forcing myself to write?

23. Do you prefer prompts and challenges, or completely independent ideas?

completely independent ideas, I’ve realized in the past prompts shoot me in the foot often unless I luckily figure something out. but I’m often driven by my own sporadic self interest with shitty ping ponging attention

24. One-shots or multi-chaptered works?

multi-chap I guess cause I can post without being finished LOLLL but tbh can I really answer? I haven’t finished anything.....

25. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!

I can’t answer this question imo because I haven’t finished a fic yet so technically stuff could all fit in the one fic?

26. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?

MYSTERY AND CRIME! I love the genre and I have plot ideas once a blue moon but I can’t dive in because I want to make details that work and reduce plot holes where suspension of disbelief isn’t as needed. I need to study it more (I need to study all the details for any of my fics imo to be confident sometimes LOL)

27. What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received?

I don’t think I can say one comment was the nicest because I’ve gotten comments that have given me quite the smiles to my face many times! I know this is a cop out but it’s true!

IS WHAT I WAS GONNA SAY UNTIL REINA SENT ME THE FOLLOWING ON DISCORD LIKE TWENTY MINS AGO:

and also rad. i am never this vocal about my emotions like EVER but this needs to be said your fics are obviously far from perfect, as are mine and everyone else's. but the thing about your works is that they're so well-sanded that it's impossible to find any rough edges or faults in them in terms of cohesion to a plot. your cast is never OOC and the amount of effort you devote to developing your takes on the characters as accurately as possible is unimaginably awe-inspiring.

BITCH I WANNA CRY 😭

28. How well do you handle criticism when it comes to your writing?

I’d like to believe I take it often well to try and improve because that’s always my goal. if someone is rude lol that’s not constructive snd is unhelpful. If I disagree with criticism I’ll explain why !

29. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

Not yet, but I have some plot ideas I think will let me test this.

30. Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst?

F L U F F.

31. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!

elliott fuji, a japanese-american award winning photographer who is erina’s boyfriend in ‘soma panics’ which..causes soma’s panic LOL he’s 30 with slightly wavy black hair. I still haven’t pinpointed his personality just yet...he kind of humble brags for sure an artsy fucker and flirts maybe I’ll make him a lil shy though. he teaches sometimes, and becomes an adjunct photography professor in Tokyo so he can be with erina.

32. Summarize a random fic of yours in 10 words or less.

a cook is unfashionably late in realizing his feelings.

33. Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process?

I am a slow. so slow. motivation who is she? I also write out of order, unfortunately a bit too often.

34. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

this should be for the fic ‘soma panics’ it’s either megumi or satoshi talkin to him rn, I’m leaning towards satoshi

“You thought she would always wait for you, didn’t you Soma-kun? To always welcome you home.”

Soma drags his palms down his face and groans. He doesn’t like this at all. He doesn’t shy from confrontation but this is a whole different ballgame. Soma doesn’t play any ball.

“I guess..?” Is his reply, because he thinks he isn’t sure how to answer that.

“You guess?”

Just being questioned again is enough to crack Soma’s pathetic facade as if it was dropped chinaware and he lets out the longest sigh.

“No.”

Coming home means coming home to Nakiri Erina too.

Nakiri Erina is his forever.

this is @takoyakitenchou’s excerpt she’s most proud of that I’ve written, which is also from you guessed it, the long fic soma panics

SOMA: I am, I mean I will be, I swear I will always come home to you, not spend as much time abroad, once I’m done with work I’ll come right back. I’ll make sure to message you. Nakiri, I’m in love you with you. Maybe for a really long time. You know how I say I dedicate my food to you? My dad—my dad said that the key to become a good chef is to find someone to dedicate your cooking to. A special someone. For my dad it was my mom, you know? For me it’s...

(this is a good piece of dialogue tbh so I am also proud of this)

35. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

I’ve mentioned it throughout this but the WIP I’ve nicknamed ‘soma panics’ is something I’m super excited to write, but it’s going on slowly...and almost completely out of order. out of all of my writing it showed off that particular habit of mine, along with “what is this, a shoujo manga?!” though the latter is currently being written chronologically now that I’ve posted chapter one and is pretty solid in direction. it was originally supposed to be a one shot but I got impatient and wanted to post at least something for the sorina / soueri fandom.

however, because ‘soma panics’ (I won’t call it that LOL) is my baby I want to keep true to my rule of refusing to post it until I have a draft of the entire fic finished and I’m satisfied with the main points pretty much. due to my writing out of order, I’m worried I’ll change my mind about scenes or want to reflect things in earlier chapters for later ones etc etc

I joined the SnS fandom extremely late, as season five was airing. I was a fan of the manga five years ago and dropped it because I forgot to check for updates when I caught up 😔 I really want to bang out the different fics and aus for sorina that I have before the fandom fizzles out entirely but tbh I’m writing for myself, I’m manifesting what I want to see and I’ll just share it with all my friends to read if no one else will. cause I’m slow broski I dunno what writing fast even is like LMAO I do really want to write faster though, so I can contribute more and let the words free from the discord dms....

#ask meme #ask rad shit #writing #writing by rad #fanfic #reina girl u put me thru it I swear lol #thank u for sending!!#ur amazing!!!!

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prettygraceful · 4 years

Text

magnus & the main characters interaction count: a study

an interaction counts as magnus talking specifically to 1 main and that main character responding, or vice versa. (you know like alec does with jace/ clary/ izzy in 95% of the episodes throughout the whole series and luke/ simon in half of s1 and s3.) an interaction is NOT where magnus addresses the group in general with no one responding to him directly, or him being in the same room with all of them, but they only talk to alec or to each other.

this count starts from 2b. s1/ 2a did NOT have anywhere close to an adequate amount, but at least there wasn’t so little that it was total joke like after that. the sad truth of this is so glaringly obvious when it’s listed.

plz take note this post is about magnus/ MAIN character interaction ONLY

and obviously this count is about the 6 mains other than alec

SEASON 2B

2x11: NONE

altho clary/ jace are in the room, they only talk to alec

2x12: NONE

2x13: NONE

2x14: 1 scene with luke

2x15: NONE

altho jace/ izzy are in the room, they don’t talk to him

2x16: NONE

he was not in the episode. he also was not in some episodes in s1. luke and maia have also not been in some.

clary, jace, alec, izzy, and simon have been in every episode. just saying.

2x17: 2 scenes with luke

2x18: 1 scene with luke

2x19: NONE

altho the shadowhunters/ luke are in the room, they don’t talk to him

side note: making literally everyone be against magnus/ glaring at him/ shading him behind his back after all he’s literally done for every single one of them was… a choice. they all didn’t seem to care that he was hurting.

2x20: 1 scene with izzy

final count:

6 episodes (over half the season) with NONE

2 episodes of only 1 scene interaction

only 1 episode where he interacts throughout, yet still only with 1 other main

only 3 scenes where he gets to talk to another main without alec there

no scene where he talks to another main and alec isn’t mentioned

SEASON 3A

3x01: NONE

3X02: NONE

altho shadowhunters/ luke are in the room, they only talk to alec

3X03: 1 scene with izzy

3x04: NONE

altho clary is in room, she only talks to alec

3x05: NONE

3x06: multiple scenes with clary

3x07: NONE

altho clary/ izzy/ simon are in the room, they only talk to alec

3x08: multiple scenes with izzy

no, owl!jace saying alec would chose jace over him doesn’t count

altho luke/ simon are in the room, they only talk to alec

3x09: 1 scene with izzy

3x10: 1 scene with jace

altho should a scene of him telling the parabatai he gave up his magic for them and them not saying anything count?

final count:

5 episodes (half the season) with NONE

3 episodes of only 1 scene interaction

only 2 episodes where he interacts throughout, yet only with 1 other main

only 1 episode where he gets to talk to another main without alec there

no episodes where he talks to another main and alec isn’t mentioned

SEASON 3B

3x11: 1 scene with izzy

altho jace is in the room, he only to talks alec

3x12: NONE

altho jace/ luke are in the room, they only talk to alec

3x13: 1 scene with izzy

and 1 single line to clary, i guess

3x14: NONE

3x15: NONE

aside from 1 single line to simon, i guess

no, clary/ jace/ izzy unkindly questioning him being there doesn’t count

side note: making magnus be surrounded by a room full of racist-coded shadowhunters in s3 was… a choice. what was the point of that? it showed that apparently only laws have changed but not societal sentiment- outside of the main foursome- since s1 in their mindset towards downworlders. and then they had malec get married amongst these racists a few weeks later?? to show him being treated so disrespectfully (again in s3, so nobody’s mindset progressed outside of the 4) and be made so uncomfortable and then never have them show him any love or treat him as an equal later on (as an individual and not just as half of malec) was… a choice. a bad choice.

3x16: NONE

3x17: NONE

3x18: NONE

altho clary/ jace are in the room, they only talk to alec (and then when he’s sad over something that their 3a choices caused, they leave. in the same episode the writers have maryse say “we’re all here for you”…what a joke.)

3x19: NONE

3x20: NONE

altho izzy/ clary/ jace are in the room, they only talk to alec

3x21: NONE

aside from 1 single line to simon, i guess

no, saying only biscuit doesn’t count

3x22: NONE

altho it’s his wedding day, they don’t let jace/ izzy welcome him into the family but instead irrelevant max.

and altho it’s literally the finale, the ONLY person he gets to talk to is his rival. (side note, but lorenzo and underhill should NOT have been at the wedding after their awful treatment towards him. such two-faced people.)

final count:

10 episodes (the length of a normal half season) with NONE

2 episodes of only 1 scene interaction

0 episodes where he interacts throughout

1 scene where he get to talk to another main without alec there

in his 1 scene in 3x13, he talks to another main and alec isn’t mentioned

i think the point i’m making is obvious: the 3 white showrunners and mostly white writers almost never ever let magnus even talk to any of the other main characters. (he also goes three seasons without a single story arc with another main that lasts more than 1 episode. (no, the writers using luke as a mouthpiece to justify alec’s mistake in 2b does not count.) you know, like how alec had big long arcs with both clary and jace in s1, 2a, and 3a and izzy here and there. even maia, the most neglected character on this show, still got to regularly interact with simon and luke- 2 mains. even luke with his limited screentime, still got to regularly at least talk to literally all of the mains in all his group scenes.

and what about the 3 downworlder mains and alec?

well, altho alec and maia only had 2 scenes together, that’s still twice what magnus/ maia got, seeing as they only had the 1 scene together in 2a.

alec and luke had at least 3 scenes together in s1 that i can remember vs magnus/ luke only having 2 lines in 1x06. both duos had about equal in 2b.

in 3a alec/luke had 5 scenes together. magnus/ luke had none where they actually spoke to each other. in group scenes magnus only talked to alec.

in 3b alec/ luke had 3 scenes. magnus/ luke had none. plus luke told alec that he couldn’t go to his wedding, instead of telling magnus.

in s1 magnus/ simon had maybe 1 line. alec/ simon were interacting constantly throughout, i don’t remember how many scenes it was.

in 2a magnus/ simon had 2 episodes together. in 2b they had 1 scene but i don’t really count it since it was only to have it be literally everyone vs magnus. alec/ simon had 1 scene in 2b and none in 2a.

in 3a alec/ simon had 3 scenes interacting together. magnus/ simon had none where they actually spoke to each other.

in 3b all the fans complaining really paid off! 2 scenes in 3x15. 1 scene each in 3x17, 3x19, 3x20, and 3x21 for a grand total of 6 scenes. plus no talking- yet still in a scene together- in 1 other scene in 3x15, 3x17, 3x18, and 2 others in 3x19, for a grand total of 5, not counting the edom finale scenes. magnus/ simon only said 2 lines to each other in 3b.

not to mention alec stood next to simon in a nice two-shot in 4 separate scenes. it really reminded me of what they do with clary/ alec in group scenes. the writers don’t always give them a lot of dialogue together, but they’re sure to get that dynamic in at least visually. alec always has at least crumbs vs magnus getting nothing. where is that energy from the writers, directors, or fans with magnus and literally any main? really, where is it?

i mean, there was no reason for alec/ simon not to have scenes, but i’m so truly disappointed that this is where the fan effort was spent instead of lobbying for magnus to get to interact with even one main character other than alec, seeing as alec always already get to constantly have many, many, many duo and group scenes and big arcs with the 3 other shadowhunters. and now he gets to be more bonded with all of the main downworlders too instead of magnus with his own people. the writers are so so so wack.

also obviously magnus interacts with alec on a regular basis. the point is that’s it. malec is the main reason why i watch the show, so it matters a great deal, but when every other main is getting vastly more interactions, it’s a problem. also in nearly all of the episodes when alec has scenes with other mains- and magnus is not there- magnus is not mentioned. not so when it’s vice versa.

why not count any supporting characters you may be saying? because that’s not what i hear everyone demanding for alec or the others, is it? because he didn’t interact with raphael, his supposed son, in s1, or at all after 3x01 to the actual finale. because aside from her bringing madzie over in 3x11, catatrina and and him didn’t speak in 3b. she wasn’t even introduced until 3a (so 2 seasons w/o any friends.) they only spoke in 4 scenes total in all of s3. she was his best man, yet that’s not important enough to show on screen. ragnor was literally only 1 episode. who’s left- his jealous, bitter pathetic rival or his father who has obvious gross, creepy incestuous, jealous feelings for him. or alec’s mother, who only had scenes with him for the same reason maia/ jordan had all those scenes- to give them something to do away from the group/ main plotlines. why couldn’t magnus and maia had scenes together also or instead? and being bffs with his bf’s mom but not getting to even TALK to his parabatai, the person alec’s closest to platonically, let alone be friends, is truly beyond words. and also harry and matt are only 5 years apart (kat/ dom have more of an age difference) so i’m tired of the writers/ fans keeping alec in the playpen with his younger co-stars while magnus is separated to only older ones.

and also i just really don’t care about supporting characters. i see them as just taking screentime away from the mains, specifically the downworlder mains, who are already running on limited time. look at 3x13 when they want to do a whole heidi arc, who gets cut- magnus. or in 3x17 when they want to introduce helen and aline, i resented them right off the bat for getting twice as much screentime than magnus, a main character, in that important episode for him. throughout the whole show, whenever supporting characters are getting screentime, it always means magnus, maia, and luke are not. that’s not good.

some final thoughts, nearly every single malec fan spent the entire 9 month hiatus from 3a to 3b relentlessly saying alec needs interactions. as if he didn’t get huge bonding arcs with clary and jace in s1 and 2a and 3a. as if he doesn’t talk to and go places and do things with clary, jace, and izzy nearly every single episode, every single season since the beginning. mighty handy to not count the 3 of them when you want to cry “alec has no friends” every single day, as if he hasn’t had an enemy to friendship arc with clary 3 times in 3 seasons. as if he hasn’t had a dying, can’t live without you arc with jace 3 times in 3 seasons. as if he doesn’t hug jace twice more than magnus per half season. as if he doesn’t have izzy there to lean on and talk to. funny how siblings don’t count as friends when it’s mighty convenient that’s they’re the only mains to have siblings. i would kill, KILL, for magnus to be even talk to jace and izzy let alone be real friends, yet fans are taking their friendships with alec for granted, while simultaneously saying they’re robbed of the parabatai dynamic. that’s rich.

if alec having scenes every other ep, and melodramatic arcs every other half season, wasn’t such a guarantee the fans have learned they could count on, nobody would say that his siblings and clary don’t count. but everyone knew they could say that because we know it wouldn’t be taken away. i mean, look at the stark siblings in game of thrones. they never interacted, and the entire fandom cried about that being the most important friendships to show, but it wasn’t shown. this fandom needs to put things in perspective and stop taking the lightwoods sibs and the shadowhunters squad dyamic for granted and realize that magnus and maia don’t get even a minuscule fraction of that. also want to add that simon got plenty of constant sturdy dynamics too, with clary, jace, luke, maia, and izzy. and fans got their alec/ simon content and yet still so ungrateful. i beg the malecs to compare what magnus gets before complaining.

#shadowhuntersedit #malecedit #magnusbaneedit #aleclightwoodedit #shedit #meta

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signofwolf · 3 years

Text

Kingdom of Ash by Sarah J. Maas – book review

Series: Throne of Glass #7 Genre: YA, Fantasy Theme: Fae, magic users, war Warnings: mentions of torture, imprisonment Star rating: 0,5/10

Why did I pick this up?: I wanted to end this horrible series once and for all.

[Heavy spoilers ahead]

To make myself clear, before this book I quite liked this series. It wouldn’t place in my top 100 books, not even close, but it was a pleasant pageturner to listen to in audiobooks when working.

Language

Let’s start slow. I lack the words to express how much I hate the words ‘male’, ‘female’ and ‘mate’ after this series. Not even gonna try to express my trauma. But these 3 gems aside, Sarah J. Maas needs a dictionary. Or compress her work to a manageable size. Everything sang, Everyone melted, Every man roared, Every woman trembled, Everyone was unleashing themselves at least once a chapter (number of chapters: 122) ). And now I know definitely too much about Yrene’s ‘womb’. I know so much…

Dynamism

I thought that was a book about a war with heavy action content. Oh boy, I was wrong. This 984-pages monstrosity has maybe 5 pages of action. If you squint.

Every sequence, where by design action should take place was followed by one of two scripts:

Few sentences of action and then a few pages long internal monologue. Often repeated with the same character after the next few sentences of action, or with the next character and then the next (sometimes the first character made a second appearance and then everything would go all over again). And the word ‘character’ used in these sentences is not because I’m rambling. This book is written that way!

Few sentences of action and then action stops, and we are graced by a few pages long conversation. In the middle of a battle. Or spying. Or in Erawan’s chambers, when his castle is going down, and he is running up the stairs...

Time

Leaving alone the fact that apparently all series took less than a year (till this book I estimated the plot for about 3 years, Wiki told me it was 2, but Maas knows best), because that is a can of worms in itself. Time in this one? I honestly have no idea. There were many ‘few weeks of travel’ parts with two main groups of POVs. Personally my only time indicator was ‘Orynth won’t fall till Aelin gets here’. But nothing just fit. And I saw Lost Song when in the last episode we as the audience realized that our two POVs parallel storylines are in reality millennia apart. Lost Song made sense.

Emotional loading

… there wasn’t any. Really, it was like reading a milk label. Every time the scene was potentially emotionally impactful, Maas went ahead to overexplaining EVERY. GOD. DAMMED. THING. And it was abso-fucking-lutely everything. ‘Emotional dilemma? Let’s current POV explain it! 2 pages should be enough… Damn maybe it wasn’t enough. I know! I’ll switch POVs and explain it through the other character!’ <= My impression of Maas’ thought process. I’m fairly sure that the record was 7 POVs explaining the same thing in the row, but I was blacking out a little, so I cannot be sure.

And if that wasn’t enough, this book had a second way to defuse tension: random-plastic-repetitive-badly_written-smut. Really badly written and really repetitive. How could you not feel the spicy bits, when Manon (cruel, self assured 100+years old witch-queen) reacts the same in bed as Elide (20years old, virgin, ex-slave). And the rest of them were the same, there weren’t ANY distinctions.Just copy-paste.

The next point in current case: Someone died, it was impactful, I really liked the character, so I got sad. But then 2 of our characters came out of the room with a body, and after a paragraph of grieving they started making out, and then I was regaled with 2-pages-long description of melting cores. That was the place then this book stopped being badly written, and started being distasteful.

Characters

Remember when I was writing about switching POVs (which is 15(!!!) In the whole book. Oh and an omniscient narrator in places when our current POV was grieving too much to overthink something, but Maas still wanted to inform us about something)? They were all savagely murdered in the worst way: character mutilation. Somewhere between books our maybe-not-that-original but colorful and interesting characters became carbon copies of each other. I have no idea how many times I didn’t realise there was a POV switch. The only indicator was a change of pronoun, or when Maas was telling us the name of a current narrator. These were the only ways. And if you can't distinguish if you are in Dorian’s head or in Manon’s, that is the sign of a really BAD writing.

Romance

…there wasn't any. In all this book there wasn't any naturally progressing romantic scene. There were Maas’ endgame pairings which were sexing or pinning. As the author Maas loves to write about soulmates. And it’s not a bad thing itself. When I want some fluffy story I often tag ‘soulmates’ in AO3 and voila, +10 to good mood. But God above, it is not cute when every pair you write about are ‘true mates’ just BECAUSE. It is the only way Maas sees a relationship, as a fated pairing, written in the wake of the universe by the God himself. There is no choice, nor the work to put in it. They are the author's OTP and that means that they are perfect and they should have children right now. Point in case:

Guy was treating a girl like a shit on his sole, including throwing her naked out of tent, on a snow, with their friends present, all the while abusing her verbally in a worst way. But it’s okay, because when she almost died he realised his mistakes and apologised. Two scenes later, he was forgiven, because... fated mates?

The pathos

I know that many people don't like this type of scenes, but it's not my case. I’m reading by picturing images and not repeating words. I like sequences that I can imagine to be grand and glorious, even if they are a little corny. That said, the pathos scenes were the most disappointing ones for me. Maas likes to write parts that are more picturesquely exalted than logically possible [point in case: meeting of 5 armies/forces in the random patch of sand in Empire of Storms, and it being painted as ‘an Aelin’s great plan’. I laughed myself silly at that. But not taking logic and all the plot holes into consideration that was a nicely looking scene. In Kingdom of Ash that wasn’t the case. I would say that the author wanted to paint us a renaissance painting every 20 pages or so. In my opinion, every time she failed miserably. Each and every of those scenes was or to farfetched to be even remotely realistic, and evidently written only for a sake of the picture, or just plainly stupid.

Example, and it’s so priceless a scene, that I just need to share it: Battle of Orynth, 25th day or so (time in this book doesn’t exist), the 13. sacrificed themselves (like thousands before them but hush). And then, time stops: grieving Manon is going through the city, they open the gates for her (yes, the siege is still on), she goes to the place where they died, after her come out all of our main heroes, and half the city itself with ‘flowers, rocks and precious possessions’ and they lay it there in a tribute to these brave (evil till 2 months ago) witches. I honestly can’t remember when was the last time I saw such an abstract scene. It’s a material for an essay in itself. No, I could not take it seriously.

Additionally, it's hard to make an impact as every damn sentence is grand and lofty. In the end it became truly pathetic, Aelin vs Maeve was unreadable.

Character deaths:

Let's make a quick count: main characters in a series at the start of KoA: 12 secondary characters in a series at the start of KoA: 20ish minor and total background: a lot more

Death count: main: 0 secondary: 3 minor: 2 (11 if we try very hard)

Resurrections: 1 (possibly 3, but not gonna analyze it)

Did you feel emotions of this impossible war against this all-encompassing, all-powerful, invincible, immortal, cunning Evil with armies from 3 continents and 2 worlds? No? Me neither.

Oh well, but there were a lot of deaths of ordinary soldiers. I’m quite certain that all of Terrasen’s army was at least twice brought back to life for them to die in these numbers.

Logic or lack thereof

Oh, and let’s not forget about the Deus ex machina army of unbeatable, magical elves on wolves, from legends, living for the past thousands of years in the unreachable lands of the north, because they managed to run from the surprise attack 10 years earlier. Did I mention that they came from portals, which the whole book was telling us were impossible to make in this scenario? After the previous saviour army was already fighting there for a day? And that Aelin didn’t know they would come for sure (how did she contact them again?)? Even though they were waiting in the full armours for these portals? Ah, and also: that army didn’t do anything. They just came and fought for maybe 4 minutes. And there were just so many things like that!

And if we’re on the topic of armies I present you: ‘My favourite absurd-list in the series: allied armies’.

(As a comparison, in A Song of Ice and Fire by J.R.R Martin, in 7 kingdoms of Westeros, at the peak of war there were 7 forces present, but not all were even engaged in a war.)

First the ones that made sense:

Armies of Terrasen’s Lords (counted as one, not gonna nitpick)

The Khaganate army (also counted as one)

Galan Ashryver’s armada

Whitethorn fraction

Rebel Ironteeth witches

…should Dorian be counted as an ‘army’?

And there were some that did not:

Ansel of Briarcliff’s army

The Silent Assassins

Mycenians

Wild Men of the Fangs

Army of magical elves on wolves

And the ‘I don’t even know’ category:

Crochan witches

Overpowering and overreaching

Section title tells it all. The stakes were too high. I was honestly waiting for Aelin to become Super Saiyan and start to throw planets at Maeve and Erawan. I won’t spoil if this happened.

In my opinion it could be a really great series, if our list of villains ended with Arobynn and King of Adarlan, and the list of Aelin titles with an assassin and a princess. We could have had two main fight plots: one emotional with Arobynn, when Aelin would have to face a damage he had done to her, and overcome it. And the second one, with freeing Terrasen from Adarlan’s rule. That’s it. There was an asshole, power hungry king, who feared magic and wanted to rule the East part of a continent. A lot of plot, but not so much that we stopped to care, or didn’t have time to cover everything. We could really get to know what Terrasen and his people were like and not JUST GET TOLD that it was ‘the greatest place in the world’ every damn 20 pages.

Plus…should Dorian be counted as an ‘army’? It's a REALLY valid question.

Climaxes

IIf I have to write a list of things that disappointed me in this book, this review would be thrice its current size, but one of the worst grievances I have is the complete lack of acknowledging the plotlines that had been started. This book series has overall 4 372 pages (not counting novellas) and 12 main characters (still not gonna address this). All of them had their storylines and arcs but if they weren't tied up in the previous instalments they wouldn’t be in this one. I get it, Maeve and Erawan got beaten (in an extremely unsatisfactory way) but they were only a background in this series' plots.

Aelin Well, Aelin was one of 3 people (+2 paragraf-long insertion from Nesryn and Chaol) who got their own POV’s after the battle (second was technically Rowan, who was ‘Aelin’s POV outside of Aelin’.The third Dorian, who got almost a full two pages). And from this we got that: she got crowned, Aedion got his bond and that Maas have no idea how the city looks after weeks of siege. In her case what angered me the most was ‘Terrasen is my home’ subplot. Only in this tome we read at least 3 times that Aelin will be okay with dying, if only she gets to see Terrasen one last time, or if she get to die on Terrassen soil. But you know what? Maas forgot to write the scene where Aelin actually ‘comes in’.

Mannon Didn't get her own POV after the battle, but here’s what we’ve got: She is going to the Wastes with Croachans and Ironteeth. Whait. What? Yes, that was the ending of this 500+ years of feud. They fought together and they decided to unite their two species, completely forgetting more than half a millenia of slaughter. I can only hope that there were at least some talks behind the scenes… NO! F*** NO! This isn’t how it works!

Rowan, Dorian, Chaol, Yrene, Lysandra, Aedion, Lorcan, Elide, Nesryn, Sartaq Lived happily ever after

Secondary minor and total background characters Survived (I acknowledge that they would be ignored in most books’ epilogues, but this abomination is almost 1000 pages of nothing!!).

Good Scenes

That saying, this book actually had 4 good scenes:

Crochan witches go to war - gathering-forces-to-fight trope, which is my *love-always trope* so I’m not even sure if it was relatively good, or if I’m just a slut for this trope. It was still only a paragraph long though.

[recurring] The children’s tale Aelin repeated to herself to remember who she is.

‘Lorcan Lochan’ - the only marginally funny scene in the whole book

I actually found Darrel making Evangeline his heir charming. Even if circumstances were far-fetched at least.

But the words crime of this book? It was agonisingly, mind-numbingly boring. If the overexplaining and repetitions were to be taken out I highly doubt that there would be 300 pages left.

For these 33 hours of audiobook I suffered through I give it half a star. Because Abraxos exist.

Please see my garishly accurate cover on my instagram! You can also like it there :D

instagram | goodreads

#book #book review #bookworm #review #signofwolf-book_review #opinion #throne of glass #throne of glass series #throne of glass spoilers #sarah j maas #kingdom of ash #aelin galythinius #mary sunderland #tog #fantasy #fandom

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 4 years

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Psycho Analysis: Hol Horse

(WARNING! This analysis contains SPOILERS!)

So last year I thought it was a good idea to try and review all of the enemy Stand users in Stardust Crusaders in a totally random order. The results were… mixed. Some of them I think came out okay, but others? Not so much. One of them was just an entire backhanded attack against some guy who decided to say “No one likes your analyses” because I think ProJared was a creep. It was, quite frankly, a mess, and I never bothered to revisit it and never thought I would, even though I still hadn’t covered the glorious, wonderful human being who is Hol Horse.

Well, now, after playing Heritage for the Future and All-Star Battle as well as just becoming a bit more knowledgeable on JJBA, I’ve decided to not only give Hol Horse his dues, but also at least briefly go back over or cover the other Stand users and give them a rating or an updated rating, as the case may be. So buckle in, this is gonna be a long one, and it’s all gonna start with everyone’s favorite incompetent henchman.

Hol Horse is probably one of the most amazing characters Araki has ever created. Hol Horse is in possession of a powerful Stand, The Emperor, which is literally a magical gun that fires bullets he can control the trajectory of. By all accounts, Hol Horse should be the single most dangerous foe that the Crusaders face, more than even Vanilla Ice. This guy should be able to shoot them all dead without a second thought! There’s just one tiny little caveat:

Hol Horse is a fucking moron.

This man is cowardly, incompetent, and just the punching bag of cruel misfortune as all his plans constantly go awry and he is constantly knocked on his ass. And yet, Hol Horse is still the most beloved enemy Stand User of Stardust Crusaders, and it’s not hard to see why. Because despite all of his bumbling, Hol Horse just oozes a sort of cool you just don’t see every day.

(For best results, listen to this the whole time while reading the following).

Motivation/Goals: Hol Horse is one of the few henchmen of DIO who is motivated purely by his own greed… at least, at first. Eventually he has his ass handed to him one too many times, and he decides to try and assassinate DIO. This goes about as well as you’d expect, and Hol Horse – not just part of it, the ENTIRE Horse – is so scared out of his mind that he decides, yep, loyalty to DIO is the way to go! It doesn’t work out, but hey, he tried, right?

Performance: Imami Williams gives Hol Horse that raspy, American charm he needs in the anime adaptation. With his voice and the animation combined, we get to see our favorite smarmy sharpshooter who can’t shoot for shit shoot his shot and miss every time, and it is simply glorious.

Final Fate: Hol Horse kidnaps Boingo and forces him to work with him to finally get his revenge! With the prophetic skills of Thoth and the raw damage that can be done with Emperor, there’s no way they could lose! And yet, as is always the case with Thoth, things go horrendously awry and Hol Horse, despite having the ability to control the trajectory of his bullets, ends up shooting himself and knocking him out of part 3 for good.

Best Scene: Really, just the entirety of the episodes where he teams up with Boingo, especially when he tries holding up Polnareff. Considering what comes after and what came before it, it’s just the dose of lighthearted fun needed before you watch all of your favorite characters get brutally murdered by DIO and Vanilla Ice,.

Best Quote: There is only one line it could be, and it’s Hol Horse’s response to Thoth’s suggestion he kick a woman in the neck: “Listen, Boingo... I am the nicest man in the world. I have girlfriends everywhere. I might lie to a woman, but I'll never hit them! It doesn't matter how ugly they are! Because I respect women!”

That’s right, everyone. Hol Horse drinks Respect Women Juice.

Final Thoughts & Score: Hol Horse is simply astounding. The character is such a colossal screwup that he shouldn’t be as good as he is… yet he is. The dude is gifted with the most incredible power imaginable, and yet somehow he is never able to do a goddamn thing with that power! You control where the bullets go, dude! How can you not hit anything?! It’s interesting how his cowardice and lack of motivation makes him a perfect representation of the inverted Emperor tarot card, but hey, tarot motifs are par for the course with the Stand users.

But there’s something charming to how pathetic Hol Horse is. He’s always plying second banana, he’s a dirty coward who turns tail and runs when things aren’t looking good for him, he never wins a single battle, he didn’t even kill the one guy it seemed like he killed… but throughout it all he still has this sort of smarmy charisma to him that makes him impossible to hate. It’s no wonder this guy has girls all over the world, because he is a world-class charmer. There’s also how Hol Horse is just a character who really, really lives by his own personal philosophy – that is to say, he always likes to be #2, never going into a fight without backup. It’s kind of refreshing to see him always stick by this, even to his own detriment; it’s hard to hate a man who’s principled to that degree. And, of course, this man respects women. Good on him.

It helps that Hol Horse’s inexplicable popularity has led to him getting his time to shine in outside media. Heritage for the Future has two versions of him, his regular form and one that partners him with Boingo, and in skilled hands his Emperor finally gets to live up to its deadly potential. And he’s no slouch in his return appearance in All-Star Battle, and what’s more impressive is in that game he is part of the base roster while Joseph and Iggy, two of the main heroes, are relegated to DLC! You heard me right: the bumbling cowboy who did not win a single fight or even come close to it and spent a lot of time shooting himself managed to beat out out two iconic heroes from the same part onto the roster! Horsey Man must be doing something right.

As this video shows, Hol Horse is one of the most influential characters in the JJBA franchise, having helped to shape the franchise going forward and helped to inspire the traits that made beloved characters like Guido Mista, Gyro Zeppeli, and Yoshikage Kira as legendary as they are. Hell, Hol Horse is just so awesome he almost got to be a protagonist, but Araki decided that Horsey was too similar to my favorite big-titty Frenchman, Polnareff. This means Hol Horse never got his time to shine as a hero, and so stayed a villain til the end… but hey, can he really be that sad if he gets a 10/10 on Psycho Analysis?

Actually, maybe he wouldn’t like that. He likes to play second fiddle to others, after all. But I guess that’s just the curse with these JoJo villains who want to not stand out; they always end up being the best and most memorable characters.

Anyway, now that we’ve got the best of the best out of the way, it’s time for...

Psycho Analysis: DIO’s Other Henchmen

I’m just gonna give my brief thoughts on these guys. Most of them are pretty one-note oneshots, but there are a few who rise above that and manage to be something else entirely. These guys were a learning experience for Araki, and his enemy Stand users of the week definitely improved with later parts, with Vento Aureo really cranking it up to 11.

But for now, we’re stuck with these guys.

Gray Fly: I actually stand by my opinion from my original review of him; he’s nothing incredibly memorable, but he’s a solid start to the adventure and he is directly responsible for diverting the journey onto the course it ended up going on. Without him, things would have likely played out far differently. A 5/10 is still a good score for him.

Fake Captain Tenille: He actually gets bumped down to a 2/10, due to my changes in how things are scored. He’s not amusing enough to be in the “So bad it’s good” category of the other 3s, he’s just really lame and forgettable, and he still somehow manages to lose when he has the advantage. What a dweeb.

Forever: If you think the monkey boat fight is dropping in score, you’re mistaken. Forever remains at an 8/10 for being such a delightfully weird curveball that helps set the tone for the franchise to follow.

Devo: One of the weirder playable character choices from Heritage for the Future, and certainly not one I like too much; he’s also a random event that is pretty useful in All-Star Battle’s online campaign, so that’s a good mark for him. If nothing else, he gave a good showing of Polnareff’s skills when under pressure, so… yeah. I think a 5/10 is good enough.

Rubber Soul: This review I regret because I was backhandedly responding to that guy who weirdly decided to bring up my distaste for ProJared in a review of Arabia Fats and Kenny G. I do mostly stand by what I said; Rubber Soul is one of the more amusing minor foes, if only because of his ridiculous performance as Kakyoin. Still, it really sucks he was just a clone character in Heritage for the Future… put he gets points for having the iconic cherry-licking as a taunt. 6/10 is where he remains.

J. Geil: Again, my opinion hasn’t changed: J. Geil is a mountain of wasted potential, but at the very least he makes for a good antagonist for his brief appearance and hey, he’s the one who helped bring us the beautiful hunk of man that is Hol Horse, so I’d feel bad giving him less than a 7/10.

Nena: I honestly think Nena is one of the most boring Stand users of the part, which is sad because her episode gives Joseph the spotlight. She’s just really gross and uninteresting, and you’ll likely forget her after her episode is over. 2/10.

ZZ: ZZ is not particularly great, and his design is just there to be a joke, but it’s hard to totally hate a guy who manages to roll references to Christine, Duel, and the album cover for Eliminator by his namesake into one. I think he’s more of a 4/10, but probably on the higher end there. He’s not great, but he has enough going for him to keep me from hating him.

Enya: So if I thought that J. Geil was a waste of potential, I feel this even more so for his mother Enya. Despite being hyped up as this big, intimidating right-hand woman to DIO early on, she gets one appearance where her Stand is defeated by Star Platinum pulling a power out his ass and then is unceremoniously killed by Steely Dan of all people. I will give her this: her interactions with Polnareff are absolutely hilarious. But when all you have going for is some jokes, don’t be surprised when you end up with a 6/10, which you’re pretty much only getting because even despite the mountains of wasted potential you’re really not that bad.

She do be looking hot in the OVA tho.

Steely Dan: My opinion is unchanged; he’s a solid 7/10 oneshot douchebag. Nothing more, nothing less. His level in the PS1 game seriously blows, though.

Arabia Fats: I was too hard on this guy. While I meant everything I said, and his episode is boring filler, does it really make him a bottom of the barrel all-time worst villain? No. It just makes him a crappy joke character. 2/10.

Mannish Boy: I regret not getting to this guy last time, because aside from Forever he’s probably one of the most insane Stand user of the part, seeing as he is an infant. Like, he’s just an evil baby who can kill people in their dreams. And he gets defeated by being force fed his own crap. Much like Forever, it’s fun to speculate where exactly DIO found this guy; did he just go to a nursery and start jabbing babies with the Stand arrow? Did he meet this guy at a Cairo night club? What exactly is Mannish Boy’s origin? He’s just so utterly and hilariously inexplicable. He’s definitely a 7/10; he doesn’t quite have the shock factor that Forever did before him, but let’s not pretend an evil talking baby Stand user isn’t one hell of a weird twist.

Cameo: This guy really lives up to his name; his Stand is the one that gets the most screentime, with the actual Stand user being relegated to a – you guessed it – cameo appearance at the end of the fight. Thankfully, his Stand is an enjoyable take on jerkass genies and gives a pretty sad and disturbing episode that not only features my man Polnareff, but also marks the point where Avdol returns and brings “Hell 2 U!” I think he deserves at least a 7/10, even if this is mainly for Judgment. Still, a Stand is a representation of the user’s soul, so I think it works out.

Here’s the Stand:

And here’s the man behind it:

Midler: Midler is one of the single most interesting characters from the pre-Egypt half of Stardust Crusaders, and is the point where Stand users really started to get interesting. Her Stand, High Priestess, has a really funky and unique design, and her battle serves as the final roadblock before the Crusaders arrive in Egypt. Despite never appearing onscreen, with only her unconscious body being shown at the end of the fight in a way that obscures her, she got to appear in Heritage for the Future with an awesome sexy belly dancer design and a badass moveset that makes her a really fun character to play as. Taking everything into account, I think she just barely scrapes into the bottom of the 8/10 pool, though really this is mainly for her playable appearance.

N’Doul: My opinions really haven’t changed on him. He’s still an 8/10.

Oingo & Boingo: These guys are, in a word, hilarious. In between the grueling, brutal fight with N’Doul and the later fights in the part, these guys bring some much needed levity to the proceedings. Oingo gets an entire episode where he just completely bumbles about as he attempts to impersonate Jotaro to assassinate the Crusaders, failing at every turn and only managing to blow himself up in the end. Boingo fares a little better, eventually getting roped in to Hol Horse’s scheme to get some revenge, which leads to one of the funniest episodes of the entire series as Hol Horse and Oingo hold up Polnareff. I think they collectively get an 8/10 for being two of the funniest Stand users in the part. They even get their own unique end credits in the anime (with Hol Horse joining in on the fun when he teams up with Boingo)!

Anubis: Again, my opinion is unchanged, though I must say him having technically three playable appearances in Heritage for the Future does make me have at least a little more fondness for him. Black Polnareff, Chaka, and Khan are all amusing characters to play as and all have some awesome theme music. Introducing the concept of Stands being able to exist independently of their Original user is pretty neat, as well as the idea of a Stand that can switch users like it does. 7/10 is still what I’d give it, but I think that it’s pretty telling that this is probably the “weakest” character in the Egypt arcs in terms of being a villain, and yet he’s still pretty cool.

Mariah: Completely unchanged. She still deserves an 8/10, because her episode is hilarious, her playable appearance in Heritage for the Future is a blast, and she’s just really frikkin’ hot. I’m not gonna lie, she’s probably my second favorite enemy Stand user out of the Egyptian ones. I may or may not want her to step on me.

Alessi: I’m going to be honest here: Alessi is my favorite of the Egyptian Stand users. He’s an ax crazy coward with pedophile undertones who is just an utterly demented and sick individual with a seriously intriguing Stand that de-ages its victims. It’s a damn shame he never crossed paths with Joseph and de-aged him, but when he’s just such a hilarious and hateable lunatic with an incredibly fun playable appearance in Heritage for the Future (complete with awesomely creepy theme music!) it’s hard for me to give Alessi anything less than a 9/10. Attaboy!

Daniel J. D’Arby: My opinion is honestly unchanged, but I think I’d bump him down to an 8/10.

Pet Shop: Again, unchanged really. It’s hard to give a character as busted as he is in Heritage for the Future anything less than a 9/10 any way you slice it.

Telence T. D’Arby: Opinion unchanged, 8/10. I don’t have much else to say here, besides Xander Mobus rocks.

Kenny G: See Arabia Fats above. I got irrationally mad over a dumb joke character. He’s not going above a 2/10, but he’s not worth really getting mad about.

Vanilla Ice: I still think he’s the only enemy Stand user besides Hol Horse who deserves his 10/10. My opinion of him remains unchanged, but I would like to say he’s easily one of my favorite characters to play as in All-Star Battle.

Nukesaku: Ok, he’s not an enemy Stand user, he’s just some weird vampire… zombie… thing. Still, I feel he’s at least worth briefly mentioning, if only because he’s probably the only easily-defeated joke villain Araki did from the first three parts who is particularly memorable. Wired Beck and Doobie are really not all that memorable, but Nukesaku at least elicits a few chuckles – he even gets cameos in Heritage for the Future as well as getting to be a stage hazard in All-Star Battle. For what he is, I think he deserves a 5/10.

And with all these enemies taken care of, that just leaves one more Stand user to talk about.. one whose Psycho Analysis has been sitting in my drafts for a year now...

#Psycho Analysis #Hol Horse #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #Stardust Crusaders #Imami Williams

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edda-blattfe · 4 years

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Twisted Wonderland Tag Game: Post Release Version

Link to game template: https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/623310756946067456/twisted-wonderland-tag-game-post-release-version

Rules: Answer the following questions, then tag 3 or more blogs to keep the game going. Have fun, and may the gotcha goblins seek favor upon you!

Tagged by @twisted-eels

~Your twisted tale begins!~

1. Y(o/u)u just woke up in a coffin trapped with this talking rat thing that swears he isn’t a tanuki. How do you actually react?

- Severly confused but relatively calm. I would likely ask said rat thing a long list of questions...you know, like where are we, why are we stuck in a coffin of all things, and how did he manage to sneak me out of the house without waking my light sleeping but up.

2. Let’s pretend for a second that you’re not at the mercy of a magic mirror and incompetent bird dad, choose which dorm you would like to be a part of. Why, and do you think the mirror would agree?

- I used to think Diasomnia, granted that was mostly because of the gothic fairy vibes the dorms aesthetic gives off, my tendency to excel in academics, and the results I typically get from dorm sorting quizzes. However, as the game reveals more info on the dorms and student’s personalities, I think the mirror would sort me into Pomefiore. The reason I usually excel in school is because I love learning and have an (admittedly pathetic) desire to impress instructors/people in charge; also have a hard time accepting failure from myself (the mere thought of failing is enough to trigger anxiety attacks, but let’s not focus on that). These traits are synonymous with the “magnanimous efforts” Pomefiore prizes above all else. Vil’s beauty expectations would be trying, but if he (or Rook) is willing to teach that would likely trigger that desire to impress them along with those other traits. This is all speculation though. 😅

3. Going back to twst reality, where you don’t have magic and get sentenced to Ramshackle; what is your first thought upon seeing this safety hazard of a building? What’s the first thing you choose to fix there?

- “You’re leaving new here...alone..with only a talking rat for protection in a world of magic....great.” Will likely go around picking up small things at first to clear up clutter, next item is the doors and windows. Hope the ghosts can help me out at least a little.

4. In an alternate reality where you don’t immediately get lumped together with Ace and Deuce, who in the school becomes your best friend(s)?

- Likely Rook, Malleus, and Jack. Rook and Malmal are both characters with specific interests who don’t really get many chances to gush about their passions, that combination tends to work out well for me, they also seem approachable despite the out of character reputations their peers keep shoving in mc’s face (seriously, I don’t see how Rook is any weirder than say Sebek or how Mal is supposed to be intimidating when doesn’t act even remotely shady) talking to them would be easier than the “normal” students. Jack is someone I can respect for his morals and honest nature, we’d definitely get along well in class.

5. Which existing club would you give a shot? Any particular reason why?

- Science club! (Not because of Rook) The science club is a mishmash of multiple disciplines that could have been made into a separate club if enough people took interest, this is an especially enticing detail as it would offer multiple fields to study.

6. Don’t be shy, we know there’s a certain someone who’s caught your eye! Who are they? How did you meet?

- Ya’ll already know it’s Rook, let’s not kid ourselves. It’s possible I met him in the science club or maybe ran into him while he was “hunting” someone and stopped to ask what he was doing.

7. Which of the events was the most exciting for you?

- Really wanted to like Fairy Gala because, fairies. But Ghost Marriage is the fav at the moment.

8. Ghosts: delightful dorm mates or unholy terrors?

- Absolute delights! Having them around the dorm would be comforting since you know them and you’ll never be left alone in this dilapidated horror scene of a dormitory.

9. Choose a champion (no further context, just pick).

- Rook. He’d offput his enemies before taking them on, an effective strategy in any scenario requiring a champion.

10. Would you rather (a) film a movie with Vil, (b) play a round of magic shift with Leona, or (c) go gargoyle sighting with Malleus?

- C! Gargoyle watching sounds like a relaxing past time.

11. Thoughts on fairies?

- AMAZING BEINGS!!!!! I wanna know more about the different sorts of fairies! Please please please give us more fairy lore tw!

12. “Magic mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” (Choose wisely now)

- Vil is pretty, don’t get me wrong, but I think Silver is the student I’d say is the most beautiful student physically. Sorry Vil.

13. Would you rather (a) keep Azul from eating fried food, (b) be responsible for dragging Idia out from his lair, (c) break a rule with Riddle standing right in front of you, or (d) tell Kalim to his face that Jamil isn’t all that great (not true).

- B, it might take a lot of effort but he’s getting out of that room one way or another.

14. You stumble upon Rook stalking another student from inside the bushes. What do you do?

- Join him of course! Ask if he’s learned anything about his current subject.

15. Which homeland (that we know of) would you like to learn more about?

- Valley of Thorns

16. Thoughts on Grimm?

- Fluffy but kind of a jerk. Really hope we don’t have to fight him in the end.

17. If you had magic, what would be your unique magic?

- Maybe some sort of illusion magic? The thought of being able to create false sensory information straight from your imagination is enticing, ngl, and could come in handy in tricking people into say leaving their room or to get their but to class.

18. Favorite ship? (oc ships are cool too)

- I...don’t have an absolute fav....wow...erm, maybe a tie between Choco x Trey and Rosid x Lilia

19. Favorite theory?

- Crowley isn’t the main villain. At this point he’s so useless we actually want him to be the villain, but imagine the anti-climatic reveal that he isn’t.

20. The school year is coming to a close, how are you feeling? Any thoughts?

- Please don’t make me go back to my parents, this place is better. Besides, who else is gonna take care of Ramshackle if I’m gone?

21. “Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight; I wish I may, I wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight.” What do you wish to see from the game in future stories?

- More lore please, I’ll take anything at this point!

Tagging: @fluiditism , @tomik0 , @octavinelle-mafia , @choconanime , @terrors-of-nightraven , @the27th , @twistinghearts , @permanentlyexhaustedowl , @oiseaunoir11 , and anyone else who wants to take part in the tag game. Have fun!

#tag game

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zen3to5 · 4 years

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I’ve mentioned a few times that Season 6 is the last season I’ve seen all the way through. Back when I was first watching the show, I stopped at 6 mostly due to getting distracted with other things. But I also felt at the time that Season 6 just wasn’t as good as the first five. That’s about as much as I thought about it at the time; there were a handful of episodes I really liked from that season, so I’d watch those now and again, but for the most part, I avoided Season 6 and didn’t think much about it until this rewatch.

...Oh, God.

Season 6 is bad. “If Season 8′s the breaking point for most hardcore fans of this show, how much worse does it have to be?” bad.

I don’t even know where to start with this. How about with some holdovers from Season 5 that have lost all context - Kitty and Red’s personalities and dynamic. Kitty was more emotional in Season 5 and started hitting the bottle? It was motivated there - she started menopause, lost her father, felt empty-nest syndrome full force, and struggled to cope. Now, that erratic behavior’s divorced from nearly any motive (menopause gets mentioned once) and cranked up to eleven, and she becomes an alcoholic with wild mood swings. Red was crankier in Season 5? Motivated - he struggled to help his wife through a difficult time in her life and felt treating Eric harshly was for his own good, something he came around on by the end of the season. Now, though his heart attack could (and does, at times) motivate some of his behavior, he’s just generally more unpleasant and detached from everyone, and much less supportive of his family. Their marriage was complicated in Season 5? Motivated here by their respective issues and the stress of Eric’s engagement. Now, Kitty’s always high-strung and on Red’s case, and he’s always resigned to a strained marriage that he barely puts any work into.

But they don’t come off so bad - so bad - compared to Eric and Donna. I know some fans of the show don’t love that the engagement happened when it did in Season 5, or at all, but I like it. I’ll admit I may have a soft spot for the idea, having two best friends who got engaged in high school, married early in college, and are still going strong a decade later. But I also think, excepting one or two episodes that retread earlier conflicts (something almost impossible to avoid in this kind of sitcom), Eric and Donna come across in Season 5 as a couple ready to step into the future, live their lives, and prepare for married life together, and they put up a united front defending their decisions to their parents.

That resolve and maturity is still there at the very beginning of Season 6, but it slips away quickly, and by the end, their whole dynamic is just awful. The established relationship is swapped out for a lazy comedy cliche - the woman is a stiff nag who withholds sex and is always pushing over menial domestic crap but is always right because...well, because, and the man is a henpecked, horny moron who’s always doing stupid wacky crap and making a mess of everything but gets forgiven all the time because...well, because. And then to have a couple who are well-established - and even say so, in the show, as talking about everything - end up at a place where one buys a mobile home without asking the other, one walks out on their wedding without telling the other why until it’s too late, and the catalyst for breaking off their marriage - Donna suddenly wanting to stay in Point Place, which is justified by her claiming that seeing the world was her plan “when she was single” when she and Eric were still planning just this season to move, and Eric making a decision to “save” Donna from “ruining” her life - makes absolutely no sense.

As an individual character, Eric is completely derailed this season. Season 5 may have started emphasizing his nerdiness compared to earlier seasons, but only so much; Season 4 had started down that path, after all, and Eric’s still Eric in Season 5, with a good range of stories all tied in to his relationships with Donna and his family. But after his decision to stay at home and care for his family - something very much in line with his established character - he starts sliding more than any other individual character. The exaggerated nerdiness, the exaggerated horniness, the exaggerated idiocy and cowardice - all that would be bad enough, but this season also decides in the back half to push the idea that Eric is the loser of his friends group. Never mind all the established history, all the established character dynamics and comedy set-ups, never mind that his house is where they all gather - he’s such a pathetic dork at this point that Donna can’t name a reason she’s excited for their marriage, and Hyde openly remarks how hard it’s getting to be friends with his de facto stepbrother. Donna is comparatively better off, but only because her personality is more ignored than replaced; she just becomes “the woman,” a lazy sitcom cliche. (To be fair, her individual goals and quirks were largely ignored in Season 5 too, but in a much better season, that becomes more of a mild disappointment than another on a list of grievances.)

Fez’s voyeurism and “needs” were both longstanding aspects of his character by this point, but he just becomes gross in this season. If he’s not a skeevy perv who seems to genuinely believe that his friends are in open relationships that would someday see him doing it with Donna and Jackie, he’s a high-maintenance brat with no self-awareness of how much he’s pissing people off. He isn’t like this all the time, mind you, but it comes up often enough - usually in episodes that feature him in a storyline - to really damage his character. If I’m even tempted to side with Red and the INS, something’s wrong with the writing. His and Laurie’s wedding being forgotten about is annoying, but the show has such a bad track record with resolving Laurie’s material that I don’t care anymore. The new actress for Laurie does well enough, and I don’t mind that there was no romance between her and Fez, but it’s just a dud of a subplot.

Kelso comes off fairly well, all things considered. His idiocy and antics are toned down a little, and his impending fatherhood does bring out some maturity in his relationship with Brooke. I can’t say I’m sorry that Brooke didn’t get more to do, as I don’t find her terribly interesting, but as a straight woman to Kelso, she’s fine. Kelso’s relationship with Fez going full bromance is the more entertaining development for me. That’s a cliche too, but one that actually uses the characters’ personalities in this case, and the performers have great chemistry. Kelso and Fez had been paired in a few different contexts throughout the series, but this is one of the funniest. (The episodes devoted to that also have Suzy Simpson, the only recurring guest role I actually like this season.)

Then there’s Jackie and Hyde. Their reconciliation at the beginning of the season is sloppy and hard to square with what broke them up in the first place, but once they are back together, they’re the solid, stable couple of the show’s romances, and they get a few nice B-plots as a couple. They don’t really get anything as individuals (not even Jackie - more on that in a second.) So, no harm, but no growth.

This season has a few recurring guest stars, and as I already said, I only like one of them. Casey Kelso returning, and being accepted as a source of worldly wisdom by Donna of all people, makes no sense. Mitch made for a decent antagonist duo with his dad for Eric and Red in one episode in Season 5, and his brief return as a foil for Fez was all right. Here, he’s just a chore to watch. He’s a total creep, that Donna can’t see he’s a creep is ridiculous, and the episodes with him somehow seem more interested in making Eric out to be a loser than in Mitch’s rotten behavior.

And then...there’s Pam.

Pam Burkhart is barely a character. She’s most of Jackie’s more superficial traits as remembered by someone whose roommate watched T7S in college. And that means I really don’t have much to say about her, good or bad, on her own. The fact that she’s so thinly drawn isn’t an automatic flaw - as a short-lived supporting cast member, all she needs is enough of a dynamic with the main cast to give them interesting and fun material and development.

But she doesn’t do that. In the very first episode where she appears, what looks to be an ongoing story about Jackie confronting her mother derails into Bob dating Pam and the girls not liking it. A few lackluster attempts to break them up fail in the next episode, and then the relationship is just kind of...there. The girls don’t like it (not always for consistent reasons), but they’re ineffectual at doing anything about it. We don’t learn anything new about Jackie or get any new development for her. We don’t learn anything new or get any development for Bob, who’s in the relationship. All we get is one “joke,” used over and over again, that every man in the cast finds Pam hot. Something I’ve never understood about this show, even when they used the same bit with Midge, but at least it was much less prominent then. Here, it’s in every episode where Pam shows up, eats up so much damn screentime, and turns up in characters like Red and Hyde, who it doesn’t make any sense for.

Pam’s entrance is where the season goes completely off the rails, though not just because of her - other things start to go very wrong about that time. Top it off with a stupid way to end the marriage storyline, a ridiculous next-season-bait reveal about Hyde (more on that once I see what became of it in Season 7), and Midge turning up without the business about Bob and Pam getting any kind of finish, and it’s a miracle that Eric and Donna’s reconciling has any impact at all.

I don’t want to make it sound as if I took nothing from this season. It has great scenes, good episodes, and decent concepts, most of them in the front half. But it is just a train wreck at the end. I’m still planning to press ahead and finally go through Season 7, but...wow.

#that 70s show #critique #commentary

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thethera-rossa · 4 years

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My “janiizu” watchlist of 2019

1. Boku to shippo to Kagurazaka - This was actually the only drama I saw with Arashi member during this year :/ But I am really glad I started the new year with this cute and fluffy drama. It is a warm story about the life of a sweet and caring vet. This role was a perfect match for sunshine Masaki Aiba. Definitely must-see if you are an animal lover like me. Aiba-chan and all the “shippos” melted my heart. I could “live” my childhood dream of being a vet thanks to this drama.

2. Laplace’s witch - probably the biggest disappointment? It is the trailer’s fault I had high hopes. Were it not for Sho ( who did not have enough screening time btw ) and my good friend who watched with me, I won't finish it. Everything seemed rushed, not explained properly. I could not grasp all that supernatural features in rushed revenge themed plot. And Suzu’s acting was so annoying, she ruined the mysterious aura of her character because of her poor and pathetic acting. Sho was really smexy in it but simply used as an eso to sell the movie... that’s it.

3. One Million Stars Falling from the Sky - pretty old drama from 2002 watched because I really loved the Korean remake and wanted to see the original version. It is a tragic story of two people who are suddenly connected with their forgotten past just to realise they never can be together. To be honest, I loved the Korean version more, because of better described and developed relationships and more thrilling and tragic features in the plot. Some characters were lame in Japanese version, to be honest. Also, Koreans put a better emphasis on “mind game” and plot twists. But Japanese one with Kimura was as heartbreaking as Korean one with Seo In Guk.

4. Papadoru - Watched because Ryo is my fav from Kanjani and it is supposed to be legendary drama. But it ended up being a bit disappointing because of the boring plot and because chemistry among the lead couple was almost non-existent. Still, I enjoyed the relationship between children and Ryo. And little girl fangirling over Sho was my fav character :D To be honest, this is really fitted drama mainly for hardcore Ryo’s fans and other people might be disappointed in it just like me.

5. Assassination classroom - Live-action remake of famous anime. Did not expect to enjoy it. I saw both movies, and both very pretty cool and entertaining. Nino did a great job with his voice acting and whole acting casting was great too. Masaki Suda and Yamada were outstanding in their roles. I really like the nice and inspiring message of both movies.

6. Killing for the prosecution - Idk if I am that stupid but I was so confused during this movie. The story followed too fast and I could not grasp it to fully understand what is happening. The characters were not introduced well I would say...But Nino’s and Kimura’s acting was really nailed. Maybe if I could read the book it would be easier to make connections. If you enjoy thrillers with juridical features give this movie try.

7. Aka medaka - A beautiful retro biographic movie from the world of rakugo’s actors. I really enjoyed this movie because I learned something new about Japanese culture. The acting cast did an awesome job and portrayed their characters believable. Nino shined in his role of rookie rakugo actor and I was hooked to follow his life story to see how he mastered his dream job.

8. Eien no Nispa- Another biographical movie, but this time with Jun as the main character. It was a really beautiful and touching story about Hokkaido’s first inhabitants-Ainu people and the brave explorer Takeshiro Matsuura who mapped this beautiful Japanese island and fought for Ainu people’s rights. Again I learned a lot about Japanese history and geography. Jun portraying this difficult role was splendid, really hats off to him.

9. Yuuzai- Ikuta simply never disappoints me. Another heavy- psychological mystery thriller with him...hmm still did not sort my thoughts about it. For sure this movie is not to be seen just once to understand everything. There were just too many characters, their stories overlapped and too much was happening at the same time. The story was interesting and will make you hooked and wonder until the end. The acting was splendid, as expected of great actors Eita and Toma. Also supporting acting cast was awesome too. Such a pity I could not see it during the film festival in Karlovy Vary.

10. Ore no hanashi wa nagai- For me the most anticipated drama of the year. I usually don't watch ongoing dramas, but of course, Toma is the exception. At first, I was sceptical when I get to know it will be a family drama genre, worrying it will be boring, but it turned to be more fun than I expected. The whole “family” was really nice and funny. It seemed like you watch the real household like you are part of the family and together want to help find Mitsuru’s motivation to work. Toma put his whole being into his sassy and “i-know-it-all” character and sometimes he was so annoying yet clever want to kick his ass. But then he is so charming and realistic, one simply could not stop rooting for him and laugh at his jokes. This drama was a great relax for me after tiring week at uni. It made my winter friday evenings entertaining.

What do you think? Did you see some of this dramas/ movies? Do you like Johnny’s? What did you watch with them this year? I like to discuss about dramas and actors/actresses so if you want talk about my article, dont hesitate to let me know your thoughts.

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duhragonball · 5 years

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Dragon Ball GT Retrospective (5/7)

[Note: I originally wrote this on January 14, 2013.]

The final arc of Dragon Ball GT is one big slap in the face of anyone who held out hope that it would somehow get better. I remember when Funimation promoted the last round of episodes premieing on Cartoon Network. "The Shadow Dragons Saga". That just sounds epic, right? They couldn't possibly screw that up, right? I mean, Shadow Dragons have to be awesome, whatever they are. It's probably a law or something. Well, someone call the cops, because Toei found a way to take a concept like "Shadow Dragons" and make it suck.

The story begins with the fallout from the Super 17 Saga. Goku and his friends gather the Earth's Dragon Balls to repair the damage caused by the Hell portal, but when they find the balls, they're all cracked. Unsure how to proceed, they decide to summon the Eternal Dragon anyway, and to their horror the whole thing goes pear-shaped. Smoke billows out of the cracks of the balls, and the dragon that emerges is completely different from the Shenron they usually deal with. This dragon smokes a big cigar and he mocks the heroes when they ask to make a wish. The Smoke Dragon then takes the Dragon Balls away and dissipates. At this point, the Elder Kai contacts Goku and explains what the hell just happened. The whole issue stems from a throwaway line from the end of Dragon Ball Z. Then, the Elder Kai disapproved of using the Dragon Balls to revive the victims of Majin Buu. He trusted the Namekians with the power of the Dragon Balls because they refrained from using them, but he felt that frequent wish-making would interfere in the "natural evolution" of the universe, or something like that. At the time, everyone just assumed he was being conservative, but this Smoke Dragon is what he had been worried about from the beginning. The short version is that the Dragon Balls have side-effects. Each time you make a wish, it introduces bad karma to the balls. They store the negative energy until they can't contain it any longer, and if that happens they crack and release an evil dragon that can destroy the world. Normally the safety valve for this is that the Dragon Balls scatter across the planet after each use, and they take centuries to find again, which is plenty of time for the negative energy to dissipate. But Bulma invented the Dragon Radar, which has allowed her and her friends to gather the Dragon Balls multiple times in a matter of decades. This latest attempt was the straw that broke the camel's back. Bulma quickly shifts the blame to Goku, since she never would have been able to gather the Dragon Balls without his help, and Goku decides that the only way to make things right is to go kick some evil dragon ass. Pan tags along with Giru (the robot who assimilated the Dragon Radar), and that's the status quo for the next several episodes. The Smoke Dragon separates into seven evil Shadow Dragons, each with a Dragon Ball embedded in his body. Giru locates them with the radar, Goku fights them for a while, repeat seven times. As you might have anticipated, I have several problems with this premise. First, the Dragon Balls aren't some magic talisman that appeared out of nowhere. Granted, they didn't come with an instruction manual, but over the course of the story, we learn how they were created and how they work. The Namekians essentially "invented" the art of making Dragon Balls, and the general rule is that a set of balls is only as powerful as its creator allows it to be. Thus, the Earth's Dragon Balls could resurrect the dead, but they were helpless against Vegeta and Nappa, who were stronger than Kami, their creator. The Namekian Dragon Balls could grant three wishes, but they could only resurrect one person per wish. Dragon Balls can also be "transferred" from one creator to another. When Kami merged with Piccolo, Goku recruited another Namek, Dende, to reactivate his Dragon Balls. Dende not only accomplished this, but he took requests, and rearranged the wishing power of the Dragon to grant two wishes instead of just one. As a bonus, you could just make one wish, then come back and make the other four months later instead of waiting a full year. When Guru, the creator of Namek's Dragon Balls, died, Moori became their new caretaker, and he removed the whole "one resurrection per wish" limitation. The point I'm trying to make here is that the "technology" of the Dragon Balls is pretty well understood, and while it might seem magical to the uninitiated, experts like Dende, Mr. Popo, and Moori were always happy to answer questions and explain the rules. So why didn't they ever say anything about the dangers of overuse? When the Smoke Dragon appears, Mr. Popo mentions how an evil dragon destroyed an entire star system once. Why didn't he say anything about this before? Of course, it's not like the good guys used the Balls frivolously. Most of the time it was kind of an emergency, or a matter of stopping a bad guy from using them first. But still, at some point they should have come forward and explained the risks. "Look, we seriously have to stop using the Dragon Balls or else." Second, assuming the Dragon Balls were designed with this limitation in mind, why do they only turn to stone for a single year? Whoever wrote this episode of GT never considered the fact that the Dragon Balls already had a safety valve in that they can't be used continuously, even if you have the means to re-gather them all. If the safest course is to use the Dragon Balls only once every 100 years, as Elder Kai says, then why not fix it so the Dragon Balls remain inert for a full 100 years? This is the same problem I had with the Black Star Dragon Balls destroying the world after each use. Why would anyone create something so inherently dangerous? This would be like Sauron forging the One Ring and if he doesn't take it to Mars and polish it exactly seven times on every seventh Thursday it blows up and kills him. No, that's dumb. He made it convenient for himself. If he loses it, it'll find its way back to him. It's indestructible unless you take it deep within the heart of his own territory. That's not airtight, but it's pretty safe. I could accept that the Black Star Dragon Balls were a flawed, overpowered creation, but this "negative energy" idea holds that any Dragon Balls are flawed and overpowered. What good are they if you can only make one wish every century, and there's no one around to enforce that rule? Third, no one ever brings up the Namekian Dragon Balls, which were used almost as often as the Earth's set. If each wish contaminates the Balls, then a set that grants three wishes a pop should be even more dangerous. Worse, the Namekian year is roughly one-third of an Earth year, so the Namekian Dragon Balls can be used three times more frequently. The Namekians themselves had little need for that many wishes, but after the battles with Frieza, Buu, and Baby, they had to use them to help out the people of Earth at least five times. That's fifteen wishes, dammit. So where's their evil smoke dragon monster? No one even attempts to explain this, which just makes the premise that much harder to believe. I'm not saying Dragon Ball or Dragon Ball Z were free of plot holes, but Akira Toriyama worked pretty hard to establish the rules of the story and keep them straight. With GT they just do whatever and hope the audience doesn't think about it too hard. Fourth, why don't they just kill Dende? The deal is that if the Dragon Balls' caretaker dies, then the Balls and the Dragon both go inert. Usually this is a obstacle to be overcome, but in GT the Dragon Balls seem to cause more problems than they solve. Piccolo sacrificed himself to prevent the Black Star Balls from being used again, so why doesn't Dende take one for the team and end this Shadow Dragon crisis before it starts? Of course, he doesn't have to die, he could just use his power over the Dragon to deactivate it, right? Again, I could live with this as long as someone on the show offered an explanation why this won't work. The whole premise seems to hinge on the idea that the negative energy contaminating Shenron is much stronger than the powers of Shenron himself or his creator. But why should that be? If the negative energy is a backlash to the energy used to grant wishes, then shouldn't evil Shenron be exactly as powerful as regular Shenron? He can be despicable and uncontrollable, but physically he's no stronger than before. King Piccolo killed Shenron with one hit, and Goku's like a million times stronger than that in GT. And yet the Shadow Dragons are strong enough to give a Super Saiyan 4 a hard time. I can appreciate the poetry of the Dragon Balls themselves being the final boss of the Dragon Ball mythos, but it just doesn't line up with everything we've known about the Dragon Balls leading up to this. For all the hype, Shenron was never omnipotent, and he's actually pretty fragile when you get down to it. His main role is to solve problems that can't be fixed with punching or explosions, so putting him in a situation where he has to trade punches with Goku is kind of dumb. Toei tried to solve this problem by beefing up Shenron, effectively turning him into an unrecognizable set of characters. Instead of one giant dragon who looks pretty scary, we get seven humanoid-looking goofs who are supposed to be insanely powerful, but most of them just suck. More than half of the Shadow Dragons are pathetic. I'm not saying that to insult the concept, I mean they are literally pathetic characters. Goku shows up and they go all to pieces, mostly for the sake of bad comedy. Then they use guile and treachery instead of strength, and Goku only wins when he finally stops screwing around. I suppose this was a deliberate plan to make the Shadow Dragons feel like other groups in Dragon Ball. Each Shadow Dragon is stronger than the last, and the real challenge is to beat the one at the end. Fair enough, but why would Shenron divide himself so unevenly? For that matter, why do the good guys play along with that? Goku wants to fight them all by himself and no one has a problem with that? Considering how weak most of the enemies are, they would have been better off sending Goten or Majuub to wipe out some of them while Goku handles the tough ones. Anyway, the worst part about the Shadow Dragons is that they each get at least one whole episode to show off how much they suck. The Two-Star Dragon: Funimation gave each Shadow Dragon a name, and they called this one "Haze Shenron" because he deals in pollution. He's the weakest Dragon, but his pollution powers make his enemies even weaker, so that's why it takes twenty minutes to beat him. This is dumb, because all the heroes in the show are adept at sensing ki, the life energy everyone uses for shooting fireballs and flying and so forth. Goku can tell that Haze Shenron is weak just by looking at him, but for some reason he can't sense his own power fading. Of course, if he'd just destroyed Haze at first sight, he could have avoided the entire issue, but they had to stop and talk to him first. Haze's weakness is his overconfidence. Once he has Goku and Pan beaten, he tosses them into a polluted lake, thinking the acidity would corrode their flesh in minutes. Instead, Giru (who is unaffected by pollution because he's a robot) rescues them and drags them to a cleaner part of the lake. Not only does this clean water revive them, but they stay down there for like five minutes without drowning. Now that they have a second chance to beat Haze, they take him out with one hit and recover the Two-Star Dragon Ball. The Five-Star Dragon: This guy was named "Rage Shenron", which doesn't make sense unless rage has something to do with electricity, which is his power. Rage looks like a deformed bird fetus, and he controls purple slime that feeds on electricity. He's not much stronger than Haze, so he uses all of his electric slime to create a giant replica of himself to ride around in. Goku turns Super Saiyan 4 to fight him, but his attacks are useless against Rage's slime, which can absorb ki blasts and redirect them. Rage's weakness is his overconfidence. Once the battle starts going his way, he gathers so much electrical power that his slime body grows to the size of a small town. Goku and Pan are helpless against him, but fortunately it rains. Rain short circuits the slime, destroying it, but Rage's body is so large that he can't take shelter. Goku and Pan literally float in the air and watch the dumbass beat himself because he was too sloppy to check the weather forecast. Rage makes a fake surrender ploy at the very end, so Goku blows him away with a Kamehameha just for good measure. The Six-Star Dragon: They called this one "Oceanus Shenron", although he seems to be more of a wind elemental than a water one. At this point, the continuity starts to get fuzzy, because it seems like Goku and Pan have only been at this for one afternoon, but by the time they track down Oceanus, he's already established himself as a local legend in this fishing town. His tampering with nature somehow causes fish to fly out of the ocean and onto dry land, and the villiagers gather them up instead of fishing like they're supposed to be doing. For no apparent reason, Oceanus assumes the form of a green woman called "Princess Oto", but Goku and Pan see through the disguise immediately. Oceanus mostly spams this one attack, Whirlwind Spin, which resembles a hurricane. Even though Goku once broke a mountain in half with his bare hands, the air pressure it strong enough to pin him down. He could power up to Super Saiyan 4, but he doesn't. I have no idea why. Oceanus' weakness is his overconfidence. Pan is too stupid to figure out the flaw in Whirlwind Spin, so a seagull demonstrates it for her. Like a hurricane, the center of the attack is relatively calm, so if you fly in directly overhead, you can get in a free shot. Pan hits Oceanus with a Kamehameha, and Goku uses his own for good measure, and that's it. The Seven-Star Dragon: This one is named "Natron" or "Naturon". I don't even know what that means, since he's a body thief who digs tunnels. He hot dogs it for a whole episode just so he can pretend to lose and trick Pan into taking his Dragon Ball. This allows him to take control of her body, which he uses to become much stronger (his first body was an ordinary mole, so it's a big step up). Pan's not that strong in Dragon Ball Z terms, but apparently Pan + Natron Shenron is somewhat impressive. It's kind of hard to tell how strong he is, though, because Goku keeps holding back for fear of killing his grandaughter. Natron's weakness is... his overconfidence. Goku plays possum near the end, and Natron taunts him by allowing Pan to partially emerge from his body. Goku yanks her out, leaving Natron stuck in his true form, which is somehow even smaller and crappier than the other three Shadow Dragons we've seen so far. For some reason Goku's totally cool beating up this sad sack in his SSJ4 form, even though he barely bothered to use it against the other three. Kamehameha, and we're done. They spent two episodes on this bullcrap, so I especially hate this one. The Four-Star Dragon: This one has fire powers, so Funimation named him "Nuova Shenron". I don't know why they spelled it that way, unless it was for trademark purposes. They didn't call the Two-Star Dragon "Haiz Shenron" though. Nuova looks pretty dumb, but compared to the first four he at least looks like a worthy opponent. He's also the first one who can actually fight worth a damn. So of course Toei introduces him just as Goku's inexplicably weakened from hunger. It's not like they're in the middle of nowhere. Goku could fly back home in a few minutes and grab something to eat in between dragons, so why did he walk into Nuova's turf unprepared? The result is a whole episode of pointless stalling. Nuova wants to play cat and mouse with Goku, even though he seems to be able to kill him in a toe-to-toe fight, thanks to his heat powers. Goku scampers around and whines about how hungry he is, and Nuova calmly walks around looking for him, apparently forgetting that he can a) fly, b) fly at super speed, and c) melt anything in his path. If Goku punches Nuova, he'll only burn his hand, so the only hope he has is energy blasts, which he can't use because he's too hungry. Nuova's weakness is sloppy writing. Even though Goku just got done complaining that he's too weak to fight with energy blasts, he turns around and starts harassing Nuova with energy blasts. The idea seems to be that he can't land a heavy blow, but he can whittle him down with hit-and-run attacks. This leads to Goku using the sewers for cover, and when Nuova chases him into the sewer, he's briefly stymied when he runs into a dead end. Blocking Goku's path is some sort of giant ventilation fan. He doesn't want to fight Nuova in close quarters, but that fan you guys. It's turning at speeds exceeding 3rpm. It must weigh at least twenty pounds, and it's probably made of solid aluminum. How can Goku possibly get past it? Well, he digs down deep, and somehow finds the courage and skill to time a perfect jump through this enormous, slow-moving fan that probably wouldn't have hurt him even if he missed. What's more confusing is that Nuova didn't just shoot him dead while he was waiting for the right moment. Once they're out of the sewer, Goku then decides to fight Nuova as a Super Saiyan 4, even though he was too weak to do anything else for most of the episode. Intermission: Now, in the midst of all this, Vegeta's back at home having a midlife crisis. This is probably the best episode of Dragon Ball GT, simply because it's roughly 50% flashbacks of cool scenes from DBZ. Vegeta's frustrated because he hasn't gotten to do anything for the whole series, mainly due to the fact that he never advanced beyond Super Saiyan 2, while Goku is two levels above that. He wants to help round up the Shadow Dragons, but Bulma warns him he'll die. Look, maybe he's not the strongest guy on the block anymore, but I'm pretty sure Vegeta could have taken out the first four Shadow Dragons, and I'm really sure he could have blasted apart that ventilation fan that stymied Goku. Also, Pan's a lot weaker than Goku and she managed to stay alive this long. Anyway, Bulma figures out how to turn Vegeta into a Super Saiyan 4 so he can join the battle. I'm kind of surprised it took this long for them to try it, since her plan is to just use the same technology that turned Vegeta into a Golden Great Ape during his possession by Baby. Cleansed of Baby's contamination, Vegeta can repeat the process, and jump from Golden Ape to SSJ4, the same way Goku did. Come to think of it, Vegeta could have just undergone the same procedure Goku used to grow his tail back. It's been like a year since SSJ4 was discovered, so it's not like he hasn't had time to work on that. What sucks about this episode is that they spend the entire time teasing SSJ4 Vegeta, but we don't get to see it until several episodes later. The Three-Star Dragon: While Nuova Shenron fights SSJ4 Goku in a halfway decent battle, his comrade "Eis Shenron" shows up and interferes. See, he has ice powers, so Eis=Ice, or something. The gag with Eis Shenron is that he's Nuova's brother, and while Nuova's been teasing a face turn during his battle with Goku, Eis is a cowardly opportunist. He uses Pan as a human shield, has no qualms about using dirty tricks to win, and when Nuova refuses to help him, he feigns surrender and blinds Goku with a.... You know, actually, I have no idea how Eis blinded Goku. He's on his knees surrendering, he surreptitiously dips his fingers into a frozen puddle on the ground, and then he swipes at Goku's face. The implication is that Goku's eyes have been poisoned somehow. I mean, is it poison ice? That doesn't make a lot of sense. And yet, afterwards, Goku washes his eyes out with water, and Nuova gives him a small bottle of "antidote" (where did he get it?). So I don't think we're talking about frostbitten corneas or whatever. The point is that Goku spends the next four episodes or so with his eyes shut. Eis' weakness is that Goku can kick your ass with his eyes shut. He stupidly assumes that blinding Goku "halves" his strength. Except Goku can sense his enemies' ki, so he can still fight just as effectively without looking. This has been demonstrated countless times in the past, so I don't know why Toei would pretend to ignore this years later. Eis and Nuova are supposed to be the strongest enemies Goku has encountered to date, but they fight like amateurs. Goku punches a hole in Eis' body and follows up with Super Dragon Fist, which would have been satisfying if he hadn't waited so long to use it. Nuova Shenron decides to withdraw, feeling that it would be wrong to fight Goku until he regains his sight. I find Nuova's change of heart ridiculous. The Shadow Dragons entire reason for being is to destroy the world. When Goku meets him, it's in the ruins of a city he presumably attacked and destroyed. He claims to have a code against hurting innocents or the defenseless, except he's made from evil energy and his ultimate goal is to destroy the world. Goku never questions him about this apparent conflict of interest, and it doesn't really matter because Nuova gets killed before it really becomes an issue. Just as he gives Goku the antidote to Eis' blinding attack, both he and the medicine are cut down by.... The One-Star Dragon: This guy doesn't have any elemental powers, so Funimation just called him "Syn Shenron". He's easily the strongest one, which begs the question of why he didn't just come after Goku from the start. He no-sells all of Goku's attacks, and leaves him battered and unconscious. Seems like a winner, right? Syn's weakness is GT Logic. Just when all seems lost, Goku's family and Trunks show up to help him. Gohan, Goten, and Trunks agree that they're not strong enough to fight alongside Goku, but they plan to donate their energy to Goku so he can recharge to full power. Majuub tries to hold off Syn Shenron, but to no avail. Despite the fact that Syn dominated a Super Saiyan 4, the boys manage to hold him off long enough. So if they can do that, why can't they just fight Syn directly? And if they really are no match for Syn, how are their combined powers sufficient to re-energize Goku? Of course, this whole paradox is just a retread of the last time SSJ4 Goku needed a recharge, back when he was fighting Baby. Goku insists on taking more energy from the boys than is safe to use, because he needs extra juice to cope with Syn's power. This is irritating, because it really isn't clear what the risks are in this situation. Gohan and the others are no worse for wear, in spite of giving "all" their energy to Goku, and Goku doesn't seem to get much stronger for the boost. It's just a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing. Goku does manage to get the upper hand on Syn, although it seems less like Goku is stronger and more like Syn just overdosed on stupid pills. Even though we've established that Goku can fight just as effectively while blind, Syn still tries to exploit the weakness by throwing a clockface from a tower at him. Goku then blows him away with a Kamehameha-Super Dragon Fist combination. The only catch is that it doesn't get the job done. Though beaten, Syn absorbs the other six Dragon Balls, transfoming into "Omega Shenron", the final final boss of Dragon Ball GT. Hoo-boy. NEXT: The Omega Glory

#dragon ball gt #really sucks #2013gt #no seriously i'm rereading these as i go and i'm seeing stupid bullshit that i had forgotten about #every once in a while i think to myself 'well gt wasn't *that* bad'#but no it was fucking awful #goku #pan #giru #rage shenron

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