#maybe it was infatuation but i really thought i did love them for 7 years it was the happiest time for me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

irisintheafterglow · 9 months

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I Think He Knows (pro!kirishima x you)

summary: he's not into party games, so what do you do for seven minutes when you're locked in the closet with your high school crush?

wc: 2.9k

cw/tags: aged up characters!!, friends to lovers, mutual pining, swearing (lots of it), truth or dare, slightly suggestive toward the end but nothing descriptive, first kiss, alcohol and drinking, just pro heroes being idiots

note: prompt is once again from @creativepromptsforwriting because i wanted to write a silly party confession fic ! hope you enjoy, i did NOT mean for this to become this long lmao. he's literally so boyfriend why can't he be real

likes/reblogs/feedback is always appreciated <3

“I want him so bad I’m gonna pass out,” she confesses, throwing herself onto your body and sighing longingly. “Do you think he thinks of me often?”

“Now I really feel like we’re in high school again, ‘chaco. I think you should talk to him about your love life instead of me. Maybe he’ll get the hint, that way.”

“Hypocrite.” She scowls at you over the rim of her plastic cup, downing another serving of punch with questionable amounts of alcohol. “I had to hear about your infatuation all the time.”

You stick your tongue out defiantly. “It wasn’t an infatuation. It was just a crush, that’s all.”

“Yeah, a crush that lasted three whole years,” she hiccups, crossing her legs next to you on the couch and leaning her head on your shoulder. “Do you think about him often? Remember, no lies.” Your eyes immediately gravitate to who she’s talking about, supervising some drinking game at the wet bar that has Kaminari’s eyes watering and Shoto’s face bright red. Deku tries in vain to stop Bakugo from downing shot after shot, ultimately accepting a mystery concoction handed to him by Sero. He immediately spits it out all over Bakugo and both of them are so intoxicated they can’t aim hits at each other correctly. You laugh under your breath and quickly dart your eyes away when Kirishima looks over his shoulder in your direction. Ochaco nods knowingly, giving your thigh a squeeze that startles you. “Oh, you definitely do.”

Before you can respond, Mina throws the front door of Sero’s house open followed closely by Jiro and Momo. Overflowing grocery bags of junk food line her arms and she kicks the door shut behind her as her hands are both holding a bottle of soju each. Cheers echo through the house at her arrival and she bows dramatically.

“Looks like the party’s finally here,” Ochaco winks at you before joining Tsu to help Mina unload the groceries. You shake your head as your chest feels the familiar lightness that always came when your entire class was happy and having fun. It was Mina’s idea to have a reunion party, after all, and you knew everyone was looking forward to it. It was scheduled months ago because everyone’s calendars needed to line up and from the looks of it, all of you needed the break. With the press kept back by several thousands of volts of electricity running through the perimeter gate of Sero’s house, you and your friends could finally relax.

Or, so you thought.

“Okay, party people! Now that we’re all slightly fucked up, it’s time for some games! First game is 7 Minutes in Heaven!”

“As if this hasn’t been 45 minutes of Hell already,” Shinso deadpans from a neighboring armchair, but even you could tell he was enjoying himself by the slight quirk in the corner of his mouth.

Mina sends a joking glare at him, chucking a balled-up napkin at him. “Get in the fucking circle, Hitoshi.”

You slide down from the couch onto the floor and feel a muscular bicep press against your arm. “You mind if I sit here?” When you turn to that all-too-familiar voice, you’re blinded by a bright shark-toothed grin and glittering crimson eyes. You smile and nod in assent, eyes widening when you look away to stop your heart from racing. You catch Ochaco’s gaze and she smirks mischievously, to which you loudly suggest the seat next to her when Deku is trying to find a spot in the circle. You wink at her and crack open another can of some fruity mixed drink.

“So!” Mina begins as Jiro positions an empty glass bottle on the coffee table in the middle of the circle. “Do we all know the rules of 7 Minutes in Heaven–”

“Why the fuck are we using a bottle?” Bakugo’s rough voice cuts through the polite silence and Mina rolls her eyes. “Isn’t that a different fucking game?”

“It’s only there to ensure no bias in the participants of the game, Bakugo,” Shoto boredly drawls. His face is blank when his eyes meet Bakugo’s. “If we wanted, we could spin your dense head–”

“You wanna go, Ice Pack?”

“Let’s allow Mina to finish speaking!” Ever the diplomat, Momo shakes her head impatiently while she effectively halts the two Pros’ piss match. You feel Kirishima’s sigh of relief that he didn’t have to restrain anyone and bite your lip to suppress a chuckle.

“As I was saying,” she continues as she delicately dances around the circle. “The bottle will be spun two times. If it lands between two people on the first go-around, those people have to go in. But normally, whoever the bottle points at gets locked in the closet with the other person who’s pointed at for seven minutes. What you two do for those seven minutes…” A suggestive glint flashes across Mina’s dark eyes and she shrugs carefreely. “That’s none of our business.”

An awkward silence settles over the group as Mina continues to stand but seems to be expecting someone else to speak. She clears her throat and Denki suddenly perks up with something to say. “Wait, is this when I do the thing?” Your eyebrows dip in confusion, as do most of your other classmates except for Mina and Sero.

“Yes, Denki. This is when you do the thing, so go get it.” Sero pinches the bridge of his nose as Denki shoots upward, running down the hallway to grab something from the storage closet. When he returns, he triumphantly holds a cardboard box labeled “HEART RATE MONITOR x2.”

Deku groans, covering his face as Mina beams. “Oh, no…”

“Oh, yes.”

“Did you steal that from some fuckin’ pharmacy?” Bakugo and Shoto both appear horrified.

“What? No! I got it from my neighbor’s garage sale.”

“That’s even worse!”

Sounds of protest erupt from your classmates and you can’t help giggling at their reluctance to have their heart rate tracked. From your time in high school and into your professional career, you knew you never got picked during these games. You were resting easy knowing you never had to kiss one of your friends because of some stupid bottle. Especially with the positioning of Kirishima right next to you, the odds of you two needing to go into the closet together were slim to none. Tonight, you knew, would be no different than the past as you vaguely listened to Denki explain the use of the heart rate monitor.

“Basically, we’re gonna call out if you’re making the other person’s pulse jump. It’s like that one part of that couples show we caught Iida watching during our second year,” Mina summarizes and Iida’s stoic voice pipes up in defense of his “research” on how best to acquire a lover while the circle snickers at the memory. Tokoyami’s hand reaches up to pat his shoulder sympathetically.

“Alright, spin the fuckin’ bottle already! I’m literally aging over here.” Kirishima snorts next to you, hiding a choked laugh with a cough into his sleeve and you jokingly pat his back in concern. You’re too preoccupied with looking at him to notice the gasps and noises of shock as the bottle finishes its rotation around the circle. Confused at the excited expressions of your friends, you look down to see who the bottle pointed at.

It was between you and Kirishima.

You had to play 7 Minutes in Heaven with the boy you had a crush on for the entirety of high school.

Your mind blacked out, face feeling like it was on fire as you both were hooked up to one heart monitor each. You didn’t dare glance at Kirishima because, for all you knew, he was irritated about being picked for these types of games since it wasn’t manly. Ochaco waggled her eyebrows at you and you felt slightly nauseous as she hooked up the machine to your pulse, guiding the wires under the door. “We’ll see you in seven minutes,” Mina crooned. “Have fun!”

The door locked and you were in complete darkness with him. It was suffocatingly quiet, so silent that breathing felt like a trumpeting elephant. Hushed whispers come from the other side of the door as your classmates analyze your pulse.

Jesus, his heart is racing. Like, dangerously fast!

So is theirs. Doesn’t sound like they’re doing anything in there, though.

You think he’ll actually make a move tonight?

Dude, shut the fuck up. They can probably hear us through the door.

You swallow and wince when the noise is audible in the isolated quiet of the closet.

“So, uh–”

“I, um–”

You both start to speak and cut off just as abruptly, apologizing profusely and insisting the other go first. He takes a deep breath before he speaks again.

“Look, honestly, I’m not really…into these types of games,” he starts, breath ragged but you couldn’t imagine why. “I don’t really know how to explain it, I just…”

“I know. It’s okay. Not manly to make out or do God knows what with someone you’re not dating, right?” Your laugh is shaky and you mentally kick yourself for feeling so jittery.

“Yeah,” he exhales, relieved that you’re not going to expect him to do something he was uncomfortable with. You know damn well he would never make you do something you were uncomfortable with. It’s quiet again for a few moments before he clears his throat and continues. “But… I feel bad just making you sit here in awkward silence so…do you wanna play truth or dare instead?”

Oh, shit, their heart rate finally spiked!

Why’s it say that his breathing is super shallow?

You’re reading something wrong because that’s definitely not what this measures.

“Sure.” You hear him shift around in his seat on the floor and you lean against the wall, pulling your legs close. “Wanna go first?”

“Yeah. Alright, uh��well, truth or dare?”

You choose the safe option, always. “Truth.” You had no idea what he would possibly ask you, but you knew it was probably going to be harmless.

“What’s your type?” Your blood runs cold in your veins and you pray that your heartbeat isn’t as loud in reality as it is in your ears. He must mistake your silence for confusion. “Like…in a guy.”

“Um…” Your voice trails off, mind running at a million miles an hour to bury your secret. “Someone nice, I guess.” He hums in acknowledgement, waiting for you to explain further. “I’d like him to be supportive of me and my career. Good with my friends, that’s a given. Uh…yeah. Just not a scumbag.” You laugh to relieve some of the tension in your chest and feel a little lighter when you hear him chuckle too. “I don’t really care about body type or looks; I just want him to be a good person who will treat me right. In my dreams, I’d like him to treat me like I’m royalty, adore me and whatever. That’s hard to come by these days, though.”

Fuck, his pulse is racing!

What could they be doing in there so quietly that’s making him so nervous?

Shall we alert medical personnel?

No, Iida. You can see their hearts are still beating right here.

“Alright, well. I hope you find the man of your dreams then. He sounds great.” In the darkness, you could have sworn he sounded almost…disappointed? “Okay, your turn. Ask me.”

“Hmm, okay. Truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

The question slips out before you can stop it. You blame the liquid courage and the mystery drink Ochaco made for you. “What’s your type?”

Wow, that’s a huge spike for him.

It looks like their heart rate has leveled out; does that mean they’re not nervous anymore?

Maybe, or maybe they’re used to the energy now. He’s still a stuttering mess in there, I bet.

“Uh, someone familiar, if that makes sense. Like, you know, hero stuff can get really exhausting. I think my type is just someone who I can come home to and who’ll love me even through the good and the bad. Someone to help me fight battles, physical and mental, you know?” You nod and realize he can’t see it, so you settle for humming in agreement. Your brain feels fuzzy and it takes a considerable amount of effort to focus on the smooth tone of his voice.

“Do you remember the first battle we fought together?”

“Of course I do.” You can hear the fond smile in his voice. “I volunteered to partner with you because I thought you were cool.”

“You didn’t know anything about me yet.”

“Didn’t matter. It just felt right to be with you.”

Huge spike for both of them!

Seems like he’s having a whole rollercoaster of emotions in there.

Your heart stops again and you wish there was light so you could read his expression, whether he meant it platonically or something more. “Okay, my turn. Would you ever date anyone outside? Like from our friend group?”

He’s silent for a long time and you worry he didn’t hear you correctly before he gives a definitive, “No.” Impulse takes hold of your mind.

“Why not?”

“I’m just not interested in any of them.”

“But you are interested in someone?” The second question falls from your lips naturally and you don’t expect him to answer it considering that it wasn’t part of the game.

His pulse is slowly increasing again. He must be getting nervous.

“Yeah, I am.” Your heart drops into your stomach. Of course he was interested in someone, and they were probably interested back, but the likelihood of it being you was in your wildest dreams.

“Hmm, okay. Your turn.”

“Are you interested in anyone in our friend group?”

Your voice chokes in your throat. “Y-Yeah.” Sweat beads on your burning face and for the first time, you’re grateful for the lack of light so he can’t see how much you’re panicking.

“Are they outside right now?”

“It’s my turn to ask, Kiri.”

“You got an extra one on me, if you think I didn’t notice.” His voice is dangerously low, more serious than you’ve heard him in a long time. “So. Is the person you’re interested in outside right now?”

Both their pulses are racing again.

They must be talking about something because this doesn’t happen if you’re just kissing the entire time.

Oh, because you have lots of experience kissing and getting people’s heart rates up?

Ask your mom about my experience with kissing–

You asshole–

Shut the hell up! I’m trying to eavesdrop!

You steady your resolve, inhaling and exhaling deeply before answering the expectant darkness. “No, they’re not out there right now.” You can hear the confusion cross his face as he calculates who in your friend group was absent.

“Who are you–”

“He’s in here with me.” The smallest oh escapes his lips and you pray for the time to go faster, body burning in shame. “Sorry, this is a really weird way of telling you, but…”

“Can I kiss you?”

Your brain short-circuits.

“Huh?” You question dumbly.

“I wanna kiss you. Please.”

“You don’t have to, Kiri, really. You don’t have to play the rules of the game if–”

“This isn’t about the game anymore. I wanna kiss you, game or no game.”

“Why?”

“Because I like you.” He huffs and you hear him run a hand through his hair in the darkness. He only did that when he was nervous. You were making him nervous. “You’re the only one I’m interested in, the only one I’ve been interested in since high school.”

What the fuck?

Denki, your fucking machine broke!

We lost their pulses!

Did those idiots break the heart rate monitor?

I think you broke the heart monitor, stupid.

You’re speechless and, tired of words, you crawl toward his voice in the darkness. It seems that he had the same idea as he receives you eagerly. His calloused hands pull you into his lap until you’re on top of him, fiddling with the hair at the back of his neck. His breath is hot on your neck as you wait there for something to happen and you sigh into his mouth when it finally finds yours. The first kiss is gentle and sweet, careful not to scare you away. But after you catch your breath and pull him closer by his jacket collar, his fingers firmly press into your hips, running over the eaves of your body. Your breath comes short and fast and you needily pull him closer as he confidently meets your wordless demands. He pulls away for a moment, pressing a light kiss to your cheek.

“Kiri…”

“Eijiro.”

“Eiji, please.”

“Hold on. It’s been seven minutes. And, for the record, I want to date you.”

You’re barely able to supply your agreement before a loud banging on the closet door startles you.

Alright, lovebirds, that’s time! Opening up the door in three…two…what?

Before they can open the door, you catch the telltale sound of Eijiro hardening his arm and a spark of light as he slams his fist down on the door handle, locking you in but also locking everyone else out.

Oh, shit! He actually did it!

This was his entire fucking plan?

You better pay for my door when you inevitably break it open!

Let them be; it’s been a long time coming.

“Now, where were we?” You laugh in disbelief at the smug grin in his voice as he gently bites the juncture where your neck and shoulder meet, hands roaming increasingly lower on your body.

“Eijiro, they’re gonna get anxious that we died or something,” you make to leave his lap and open the door, but his arms catch you before you stand.

“I’ve waited years for you. They can wait a few more minutes.”

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

#mha x reader #bnha x reader #mha x y/n #bnha x you #kirishima x reader #kirishima x you #kirishima x y/n

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seasidepierre · 2 years

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sunkissed face part 6 | charles leclerc

FORMULA ONE DRIVERS MASTERLIST

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

summary: Long distance relationship are not the easiest ones, but when you’re seeing Charles Leclerc, it makes things easier.

warnings: You’ll want to bitch slap Harrison.

words count: 4.7k

a/n: Can you believe I posted Sunkissed Face as a one-time fic and it ended up having six parts? Also, I didn’t even have 200 followers when I started Sunkissed and now I have 1.5k.. It’s just crazy how much you guys keep blowing my mind up with your support and kindness 🤍 Sunkissed Face is not over, I still have at least two parts in mind, but who knows when I’ll think I’ve rounded up everything I had to say about them? Maybe by next year, I’ll be done with them? As long as you’ll want them back, I’ll be happy to bring them some love. In the meantime, enjoy this one 🤍 (special thanks to my friend Bunny, who came up with some details about this and who’s the best at listening to me rant about plotlines and bitchy characters. You’re the best, thank you so much for supporting me and all my babies so much 🤍 🤍 🤍)

Of course, you knew good things had to come to an end but as you drove back from the airport, your little car felt like it was suddenly way more spacious than it had been on the drive over. Charles had been sitting on the passenger seat, his weekend bag on the backseat, and if his knees had been close to bump into the glovebox at first, he had slid the seat back and found the best way to rest his long limbs in the small interior of the car. He left you in charge of Waze and took your phone to take care of the music. The drive had been punctuated by Chris Martin’s voice, making you discover Charles’ poor singing qualities when he tried to make you laugh by belting the lyrics way too loud. However, on calmer songs, you realised that when he didn’t pay much attention to what he was doing, his humming didn’t sound half as bad as he thought it did. He sounded pretty calm and nice, actually. Another thing to add to the already long list of things that made Charles the most perfect human ever. It could have been annoying if you weren’t so infatuated with him already.

Charles had decided to fly commercial this time, because jets are nice when they’re not used all the time. Make it a recurring habit and you lose the novelty of it all. So here you had stood, in the hall of Heathrow, trying to stay hidden until he’d have to pass security and be gone to you for good. You did, however, find a compromise when both your hearts tightened at the idea of losing the warmth of the other and even Charles looked sad to be leaving.

“Come with me in France,” He uttered against your lips, peppering kisses between his words. “It’s not too far, you won’t have to miss work if you leave on Friday evening. The flight is barely two hours long. You can leave at the end of Sunday afternoon.”

When you shook your head from left to right and ended up blubbering that even though you would love to but didn’t really have the funds for, Charles had dragged you to a commercial booth and booked your flights himself. You didn’t find the mental strength to say no to him. You knew he had spent enough money on you as it already was, but if it meant being able to see him again in barely a couple of weeks, you’d take it. To thank him for it, you had kissed his brains out when the moment came to say goodbye, which he’d been pretty happy about. Charles was easy to please. To hold his hand and to kiss his lips was enough to fill his heart with happiness. It was refreshing to be plenty enough for someone you were dating. It hadn’t been the case for your last relationships, finding yourself having to go to great lengths to make sure the relationship would last. It had always been in vain, now that you thought about it, confirming to you that changing your whole instinct and being wasn’t worth it in the slightest. Charles felt like he took you for what you were and appreciated what you had to offer. You liked him for what he gave you and he was plenty sufficient.

You were just happy you could meet him halfway and he didn’t think about the relationship as some kind of equilibrium that needed a complete and perfect balance. Some days he was the one putting a bit more work in it. Some days it was you. The last handful of days have shown exactly that, as you spent your entire Sunday in pyjamas, his hands barely ever leaving your body, his lips tracing words on your skin while you two channel-surfed on the TV trying to find something interesting to watch. You ended up watching a Marvel movie, which made him laugh and send a DM to Tom with a picture of the TV, stating a blatant “I can’t escape you, apparently” which made Tom giggle on his side. The movie ended up in the background when you turned back to him, dragged him down to lie on the couch and launched the two of you in the longest makeout session you’ve ever experienced.

You cooked lunch.

He ordered dinner.

You took turns in the shower and went to bed way too early for two young people in love, but you got to lay between his thighs and read your book while he used your shoulder as a chin rest to scroll on his phone. There wasn’t anything exciting or thrilling happening, still it had been a really good day, spent in each other’s delicious embrace, kissing until your lips felt sore and learning how each other’s body reacted to the touch.

There wasn’t much else you would have rather done.

And you were going to do it all again in just a couple of weeks.

But in the meantime, you had to go back to your tiny flat, which was about to feel very empty now that the sound of his breathing wasn’t going to echo between your bedroom’s walls.

☀️

It didn’t take long for you to find something to do. The first couple of days had been pretty lonely, but you found yourself hung up on your phone’s notifications, waiting for a text that would put a smile on your face. Lucky for you, Charles seeked contact just as much as you did and you realised that he was just as chatty through writing than through vocal communications. He sent you pictures of what he was doing, views of his hotel room in Baku, pictures of himself in his bright red car and mirror selfies with his racing suit hanging low on his hips, which definitely didn’t help with the loneliness you were feeling.

You wished he was here. You wished he was next to you. You wish you didn’t have to get your fix by diving nose first into the pillow he had used in your bed. You wish you didn’t have to cling to the sweatshirt he had “forgot” on your couch. But you didn’t want to have him any other way, so any second he was willing and able to give you felt like a gift.

Still didn’t mean that you weren’t feeling lonely, nor that you weren’t dealing with a major case of FOMO. Charles had just raced in Baku, having missed out on a podium by just a bit to his good friend Pierre. He had told you he was disappointed but it was largely balanced by his happiness for his best friend and you found it extremely adorable. The two of them had celebrated in a club that same night and you had had the pleasure of texting with Pierre through Charles’ phone because he was too drunk and you were getting worried as he didn’t answer his phone. Pierre had explained that he usually was taking care of Charles’ phone when they were out drinking because he had a tendency of leaving it on the tables or couches and losing it in the end.

Now, Charles was on a flight to Italy, to work at Maranello again, and you hadn’t seen his face, other than on Instagram or on TV, since he left Heathrow about three weeks ago. You had holed up in your flat since you came back from the airport and had barely received visits, apart from the exception of an odd visit from Tom that ended up with him having to rush out because one of the twins was locked outside of their place. You had seen him for barely an hour, which had been a nice breath of fresh air, but it really didn’t feel like enough. In a way, it was your fault too, you passed on Pub Quizz Saturday that past weekend, because your work had caught up with you and you had been swamped under files or other festivities like that.

So when Harry sent a text inviting you to a movie night, you took the bait so quickly it should have been a joke, but you couldn’t wait to get surrounded by friends and you knew they wouldn’t mind seeing you arriving in comfy clothes and with a bare face. Your makeup had run during your day at the office and you couldn’t wait to get out of your freaking white button-down and heels. So you wrapped yourself in Charles’ too-big-for-you hoodie, took out your most comfortable pair of yoga pants and cleaned your face bare before leaving your flat with a tote bag full of fresh underwear and your travel toiletry bag. You knew you’d more than likely end up sleeping at Tom’s, sharing his king size bed like always.

The house was a giant mess as soon as you stepped a foot inside the hallway. There were yells, noises of automatic rifle weapons and very disgusting moans of zombies meeting their gruesome end. Needless to say, you didn’t last long in the living room, seeing how the twins and Tuwaine didn’t care whether or not you were there. They had barely answered your “hello” when you have passed the door of the room, so you didn’t feel guilty leaving them there with their gore game.

You found Tom in his office, his nose deep into a script, but you knew by the frown on his lips and the little crease between his brows, that he was having a hard time with it. You sighed with relief as you closed the door, though, muffling the sounds of the rest of them all, even though you hadn’t seen Harrison yet and weren’t exactly impatient to do so.

“Hey Tom,” You whispered, trying to keep his calm atmosphere intact.

“Hey, Peanut, how are you doing?” He smiled back, pushing his script back down on the desk and you returned the smile at the nickname you’ve sported for years.

“I’m okay,” You sighed. “How about you? Having trouble with your reading?”

“It’s just a bit denser than what I’m used to. They didn’t realise I needed the more spaced one, and I’ve been going at it for hours now.”

You’d been Tom’s friend for years, now. You knew him by heart and you’ve known him back when you were at school as well, before he got some home-school in the mix. One thing you knew about Tom was his struggles with dyslexia and how it could affect him sometimes, especially when he was reading something long. Over the time, he had found some tricks to make it easier: print bigger fonts, space the lines a bit more, sometimes he would alternate highlighted lines and blank ones. But at some point, he would just grow tired and frustrated, which you reckoned might be exactly what was happening right now.

“Give me that,” You softly said, grabbing the script and sitting down on his desk next to him. “Close your eyes, they’re tired.”

Tom groaned a little, showing his gratefulness through noises rather than words. You chuckled quietly and made sure you were ready for the next part, which involved Tom crossing his arms over your thighs and dropping his head on top of it all.

“Settled?”

He hummed and you checked where his reading had stopped. As much as you hated it, you knew it was easier for him to dog-ear the pages he had already read, so you picked up where he had left it and started reading to him, not asking any question about the plot, the characters’ growth or the different storylines. You knew it was best to let him absorb the text first, than in a couple of hours, when he’d have digested it, maybe you’d be able to ask a few things and brainstorm it over with him.

For now, you were just his personal audiobook and that was fine by you.

You read for about an hour before Sam came bursting into the office, telling you dinner was ready. He was red in the face, the kind of red you knew to be telling of a play fight with his twin, which didn’t miss the occasion to come barrelling into the room, yelling about how he was going to shave his head in his sleep for whatever reason. You had stopped trying to understand these two a long while ago. They kept bickering and teasing each other, it was a miracle one of them didn’t end up in the hospital with a fractured bone, again.

You sat at the table and properly greeted everyone with a quick hug, even though you purposefully avoided Harrison by grabbing the plate Harry was struggling to hold, to set it on the table.

Seeing Harrison again still stung. There was this awkwardness still lingering between you two, that you literally couldn’t shake. You were still mad at him, mad that he knew about your infatuation with him and didn’t do anything about it. You would have prefered to be friendzoned once and for all, rather than being gossiped about with his freaking girlfriend. You were so glad and relieved that she hadn’t been invited, to be honest.

“New hoodie, Peanut?” Tom inquired, pointing at your jumper.

“If so, we’re gonna have to explain sizes to you, Nuts,” Tuwaine teased.

“Ha. Ha. Very funny, dumbasses. It’s Charles’, he forgot it at home. I’m stealing it until I have to return it.”

“I still can’t believe you’re cosying it up with Charles freaking Leclerc,” Harry exclaimed. “Like. The dude is a literal God.”

“He’s not a God,” You giggled. “He’s a nice guy, who happens to be very interesting to look at.”

“Of course,” Harry rolled his eyes up. “Don’t get me wrong, I love you, Nuts, but you’re you and he’s a freaking Formula 1 driver.”

“Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, my self-esteem really thrives with you all,” You groaned, grabbing the plate of green beans from the table. “May I remind you all that we have a literal superhero sitting at this table?”

“Touché,” Harry sighed.

“How’s it going with my boy Charles?” Tuwaine smiled.

“It’s going good,” You smiled. “I’m joining him in France next week.”

Tuwaine whistled lowly, impressed.

“So you’re fully dating him, then?” Tom wondered.

“I don’t know, we haven’t really discussed it yet,” You shrugged. “We’re just happy to spend time together, to be honest.”

“And you’re the only one he spends time with?” Harrison asked, his tone somewhat annoyed with the matter.

The silence that draped the table was enough to chill you down a bit. You repressed a shiver, thankful for the oversized hoodie to actually hide it and dropped a few green beans in your plate, trying to decipher if you had to ignore him or indulge his rude question.

How dare he imply that Charles wasn’t that interested in you? How dare he imply that you were one among several others?

You trusted what you had with Charles so much that you knew it wasn’t even a possibility, but just to be reasonable, you decided you would actually ask him next time you’d see him face to face.

“Dude, that is so rude,” Sam finally commented. “Leave her alone.”

“Ahem.. So. What are we watching tonight?” Tom defused the bomb.

“Anything but a romcom. I love you, Peanut, but I can’t do this anymore.”

“I’m not in the mood for a romcom,” You deadpanned. “Not anymore,” You added.

“There’s a thriller that just came out on Netflix, it looks okay-ish,” Harry suggested.

“Or we could watch another season of New Girl,” Tuwaine grinned.

Eventually, Tuwaine won, because you all loved New Girl and only watched it together. You had some serious catching up to do with Jess, Nick, Schmidt and Winston.

You piled onto the couches about an hour later. The living room was lit by a couple of candles and the whole room looked cosy and warm. Sam had made cookies and popcorn, so it smelled sweet, which really made you happy even though Harrison’s sour mood really didn’t help. He barely spoke during dinner and didn’t make any effort to even pretend that he wasn’t pissy about something, which annoyed you to no end. You were grateful for Tom and Tuwaine who decided to sit on each side of you and decided that you wouldn’t let Harrison ruin your night even more. You got rid of the pillows behind your back and nestled against Tuwaine, letting your calves rest on Tom’s thighs which he immediately took in his hands to rub them. This was one of the things you liked the most about movie nights: the fact that you and the boys had a comfortable friendship, comfortable enough that they could touch you and you’d be cool about it.

Halfway through the third episode, the pocket in Charles’ jumper vibrated enough to make a noise. You frowned and fished your phone out of it, grinning at the notification on your phone.

Charles Just so you know, I scored the fastest lap today.

You loved that he kept sending you texts like that, like little updates on his day to make you feel like you were there with him.

Did you drive around Fiorano, today?

He hadn’t talked about a track test, only some sessions in the sim, last time you spoke on the phone with him. But again, it was Formula 1, they could have had a change of plan or he could have not been told.

Charles Nope.

What are you talking about?

Charles I was the fastest one to go from the sim to the toilets and back! They said they had never seen someone so quick, ever!

You snorted at his latest text, which brought Tuwaine’s attention to your phone screen.

“Tell him I said hi,” He whispered.

“Get yourself your own cute guy,” You teased.

“Sorry but yours is the only cute guy I’ll ever be interested in.”

I’m proud of you, then! Congrats on this big achievement!! Tuwaine insists that I tell you he said hi.

Charles Ah, thank you, thank you! Gotta take the win when you can Tell him I said hi, too. Tell Tom I got his DM last weekend, it was nice of him to check on me after the race. I just realised I forgot to answer him, he must think I’m a complete jerk

You smiled at his words and presented your phone to Tom, which made him grin too.

No worries, he’s not mad, you must have been swamped with work, I’ve passed your message

Charles I was super busy, indeed, but I appreciated his DM anyway

Every day, you wondered how you had lucked up so much to get a sweet guy as Charles in your life, who liked your friends and felt comfortable with them already.

How’s the preparation for France going?

Charles It’s going okay, we’ll see how it goes on track. Can’t wait to have you back, though. The hotel they booked for us all is super nice, you’re gonna love it!

Isn’t the track super close to Monaco?

Charles Not really, we’re like two hours and half away. It’s not really worth it to go back and forth. I could take the jet, but I’d rather not deal with the fatigue of it all.

Got it! Then I can’t wait to have you back too

“What did she just say?” You frowned at the screen, having caught only the end of the sentence Jess had just thrown at Nick.

“That she liked when he called her “Bitch” because it made her feel like Janice Joplin,” Harry repeated, making Harrison huff.

“Can we please listen?” He groaned.

“Sorry,” Harry whispered.

Your phone vibrated on your lap again, making you smile.

Charles Well good thing is, I’m super fast on the way to the toilets, already!

You pushed your phone back to your lap, focusing on the TV again. Nick and Jess were in the middle of a grocery store of some sort and she was about to either go full Jess again or you had missed an important plot line again.

“I’m so confused, why is she freaking out over his shoes?”

“Because she’s trying to see if his feet are always facing her or if they’re facing something else,” Tom explained.

“And it’s important because?”

“Apparently if your feet always face someone, it’s because you love them.”

“Gotcha,” You nodded.

“Seriously, I can’t hear what’s going on,” Harrison groaned again.

You rolled your eyes at him, grateful that you were hidden by Tuwaine so he couldn’t see you.

At some point, your phone started to buzz continuously, which meant someone was calling you. You quickly excused yourself and told the boys to keep watching so they wouldn’t have to wait for you and you locked yourself in Tom’s office, accepting the FaceTime call.

“Hi,” You smiled at the screen.

“Hi,” Charles grinned back.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m a bit tired, not gonna lie. Racing to the toilets is exhausting,” He joked. “How about you?”

“I’m okay, don’t worry about me.”

“Texting is nice but I wanted to see your face,” Charles sheepishly told you.

“Well, now you do,” You blushed.

“Is that my hoodie?” Charles smirked.

“It might be, yep,” You blushed even deeper. “It’s super comfortable,” You explained.

“You look extra cute in it.”

It’s not like you could do anything but feel your cheeks flaming up once again, or more exactly, going a few degrees hotter.

A few seconds of silence occured in the conversation, a little breath of relief about seeing each other after a few days of work, of loneliness and fatigue. You both had worked really hard this past week and you were just relieved of having a small break in the form of the other.

During those small seconds of silence, you detailed Charles’ face through the screen. His stubble was getting a bit crazy but you liked it either way. A set of dark rings were hanging under his eyes and your heart clenched a little, knowing he was surely exhausted but still chose to call you either way. They were paired with small lines on each corner of said eyes, a true sign that he was happy about your call.

“Where are you?” You smiled.

“Physically or mentally?” He joked.

“Both.”

“Well, physically, I’m still in Italy. Ferrari has a couple of places where we can crash when we come to the factory, so I’m in one of those apartments. Mentally, I’m in London,” He shrugged, a small pink hue rising up his throat.

“How’s your view?”

“From the window, it looks a bit boring,” He demonstrated, bringing you to the window that overlooked a few streets. “On my phone, though..”

“Stop,” You giggled.

“You’re gonna love the South of France, it’s super pretty. Prettier than this, at least.”

“Are we even gonna be able to sightsee? I’m coming on Friday night and leaving on Sunday evening.. I’m not sure we’ll have enough time,” You grimaced.

“Not sure, but you’ll see a bit when we’ll drive from the hotel to the track, at least. Sorry about that,” He frowned.

“I don’t care, I only care about spending time with you.”

“Well, my company is exquisite, I’ve been told,” He teased.

“That it is,” You grinned.

“And you, where are you? I don’t recognise your background.”

“I’m in Tom’s office, I was spending the evening with the guys. It’s movie night,” You shrugged.

“And you’re in here, talking to me? Jeez, I’m sorry for keeping you away from your friends!”

“It’s okay, they’re still watching, I’ll catch up on what I missed.”

“Still, we should hang up. I’ll call you back tomorrow,” He suggested

“Can’t wait.”

“Hey.. I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Charles,” You laughed. “See you tomorrow.”

You sneaked back into the living room, ignoring the huff of annoyance from Harrison. You had no idea what was up his ass tonight but he was starting to piss you off as well.

At some point, you leaned against Tom, Tuwaine having wrapped himself in a blanket, you knew he might groan about you keeping him too warm. Tom draped an arm around your shoulders, dropped a kiss on the top of your head and you snuggled against your best friend, happy that you could get your dose of cuddles even if Charles wasn’t here. You weren’t exactly touch-depraved, but sometimes it was nice to be hugged.

“What’s going on?” You whispered to Tom.

“You’d know if you weren’t texting non-stop or leaving to call,” Harrison groaned.

“Jeez, sorry Dad, didn’t know you were suddenly the one deciding on the rules of movie night,” You threw back.

“Honestly, I don’t know why you came here, if all you do is text a guy you barely know, talk about him on a loop and spend time with him instead of us.”

“Excuse me?” You choked up.

“You heard me well enough.”

Your ears were starting to burn, which was generally not a good sign. And judging by the fact that Tom’s hands were suddenly gripping your calves instead of massaging them like they were doing before, you realised that everyone in the room was holding their breath.

What the fuck was Harrison doing?

Deep into the episode that kept playing even though nobody was paying attention to it anymore, he looked like a proper asshole who didn’t even care about the impact of his words, except for the fact that his jaw was clenching hard, a telltale of his annoyance much like your burning ears right now.

“You know, if you didn’t want to see me, you only had to not invite me,” You clapped back.

“I didn’t invite you. They did,” He pointed to the twins.

“I see. Well sorry I bothered you with my mere presence.”

“What presence? You’re barely here. If you wanted to spend time with that guy, maybe don’t do it here where you’re annoying everyone with the vibrations of your phone or taking his calls.”

“I won’t bother you much longer,” You sassed back, stood back up, making a beeline for your tote bag that you had left hanging on the back of a chair.

“Peanut, no,” Tom tried to intervene. “Don’t go, this is silly.”

“This is not. I know when to leave when I’m no longer welcome.”

“I wanted to spend the evening with you,” Tom tried to convince you to stay. “We could go back to my office and read that script again?”

“Tom, I love you to bits, but I think I’d rather go home right now.”

Tom sadly nodded, before the twins put the episode in pause.

“Don’t stop on my account. I’d hate for Harrison to lose out on the opportunity to blissfully spend the evening not in my company.”

“That’s dumb, we watch the show together or we don’t.”

“You’re together. Have fun,” You stated, leaving the living room.

“We’re not together if you’re not here,” Tuwaine yelled as you closed the front door.

You had no idea how you managed to keep your tears away until you closed the door of your flat behind your back. Your flat was cold, dark and smelled like the leftover fish and chips you had the evening before. It was silent and lonely, which truly ended up chipping at your morale.

It wasn’t even the fact that the situation had been ridiculous. You had fought with the boys before and you had had your fair share of words that truly went beyond what they meant. Sometimes, they were truly mean. Sometimes, the fights were extremely frustrating. It wasn’t about what had been said because rude words you could deal with.

It was the fact that they came from Harrison, who was mad that you had finally someone treating you right in your love life. It was the fact that he could see how happy you were and still decided to fuck with it, for whatever reason. It was the fact that he willingly chased you away because he was mad.

For the first time, you wondered how your friendship with Harrison was going to survive all of this.

A few weeks ago, you would have thought that if it came to a choice between the boy you liked and Harrison, the answer was easy and not even worth a second of reflection.

That night, you weren’t sure Harrison was the right choice anymore. Nor if he would ever be again.

You sobbed the entire night.

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

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romanovsonelastdance · 11 months

Note

Also a Russian article about Alexander and Olga Nikolaevna: (so that it would not be difficult for you, translation)

Speaking about the loves of Grand Duchess Olga Nikolaevna, it is impossible to ignore this one. Probably, it was a very short infatuation – maybe just a WILLINGNESS to fall in love – but it was this feeling that had every chance of getting continued. After all, Olga finally liked an equal in position: the prince of a foreign power.

In December 1913, Olga realized that her "sun" was Pavel Voronov (more?) he does not reciprocate her, and made several emotional entries about him in his diary, using a secret cipher. His behavior confuses and worries her, feelings are looking for a way out... on December 21, the denouement follows: "I found out that my S. is marrying Olga Kleinmichel. God send him happiness, my beloved S. It's hard. Sadly. He would be pleased." Olga also encrypted this entry. It would seem that the time has come to immerse yourself in experiences for a long time, but after a few weeks the mysterious cipher appears in the diary again. And if earlier he hid only declarations of love for Voronov, now Olga writes about something else (further encrypted fragments are italicized): "January 12. Alexander Serbian arrived (In Russian uniform. Wow, what eyes). January 15th. At 9:00, my Dad and Aunt and I went to St. Petersburg for the consecration of the new church of the Fedorovskaya Mother of God in honor of the 300th anniversary. It lasted from 10 to 1 ¼. Metropolitan, etc. A bright, large, good church. I was standing next to Alexander the Serbian, he was a little further away. Wow, wow what. January 17th. We had breakfast with Dad, Aunt, Kostya and Alexander. I sat with him. Cute, embarrassing and beautiful horror. Wow wow what. January 19th. Mom I don't know how. I fell asleep after 3 hours at night. God save her and everyone , and Alexander S. January 23. After in the Winter Courtyard. a big breakfast. Then we talked. I've been with Alexander for quite a long time. God save him. The 25th of January. We had breakfast with Papa, T. Olga, gr. Fredericks and Alexander S. He came to say goodbye. He's leaving in 2-3 days, it's a pity, dear."

Alexander Karageorgievich was 7 years older than Olga. He had a lot to do with Russia: he had Russian tutors, was the godson of Alexander III and the named son of Nicholas II; studied at the School of Jurisprudence and in the Page Corps in St. Petersburg. He became heir to the throne in 1909, after his elder brother George was forced to give up his rights to the throne under the pressure of a scandal. In the same year, Alexander almost asked for the hand of Princess Tatiana Konstantinovna. The Serbian minister and even the father-king personally made a cautious reconnaissance on this matter. But to the Konstantinovichs, the position of the Karageorgievich dynasty on the throne seemed too shaky. K.R., Tatiana's father, wrote in his diary: "I told her in detail about the claims of the Serbian court and about the reasons prompting us to advise her to refuse this offer. Although she rather likes Sandro Serbian, she did not hesitate to give him up." However, a year later the families still became related: Alexander's sister Elena married Grand Duke John Konstantinovich. For the Karageorgievichs, this was a great success, because they took the throne only in 1903 by a coup. In Europe, they were not really recognized, and not all Romanovs were disposed to them. In 1912-13, Alexander managed to show valor in the Balkan wars. And then he thought about getting married again, but now he was interested in the daughter of the tsar himself. ONLY WHICH ONE?

In this newspaper for November 1913, it was suggested that Olga would become the wife of Alexander of Serbia, and Tatiana – Karol of Romania. On the other hand, the English Wikipedia, with reference to Serbian archives, assures that Prime Minister Nikola Pasic wrote to Nicholas II in January 1914 about Alexander's intention to marry one of the Grand duchesses. Nikolai did not object and even noticed the interest that his daughter showed in the prince – but it was allegedly not Olga, but Tatiana. (And Russian Wikipedia generally assures: "Tatiana and Alexander wrote letters to each other until their death. When Alexander found out about Tatiana's murder, he was confused and almost committed suicide").Alexander's sister Elena, in her memoirs, which I have not yet been able to find, seemed to say that she noticed some "chemistry" between Alexander and Olga. Well, Olga's diary allows us to conclude that Alexander was not indifferent to her, and I think the Serbian heir himself paid attention to her. You can only guess what prevented you from taking the next step.In the spring, Olga is fond of Molokhovets, then the war begins, but all this does not prevent her from remembering Alexander on various occasions:"February 24.At 12 o'clock my mother received the Bavarian, Belgian, Danish and Serbian envoys (Nalajovic. So reminds Alexander C).February 25.(in small print: I haven't seen Alexander for a month since)March 25.I haven't seen Alexandra for 2 months. <...>(added, apparently, later) I haven 't seen Alexander S. for 2 months .September 4.The Pope gave Alexander of Serbia the St. George Cross 4 art . I am very happy. God help me.October 6.John, Gabriel and Kostya and Elena had lunch. They told me a lot of interesting things. She's a piece of Alexander, and I love her.October 16.At 7 o'clock we went to the infirmary with Mom, we went to everyone, and talked to K. and I. in the corridor. Everyone knows Alexander by his body."

Alexander was a thin brunette with a mustache and large facial features (and with "WOW" eyes) – this is exactly the type of appearance that has always attracted Olga. Besides, apparently, he was a really nice person. "The prince turned out to have a kind and friendly character," writes the grandson of his tutor, the famous priest Gleb Kaleda. "To please his tutor, the prince wrote to him in Russian, asking for forgiveness in advance for possible mistakes, although there were none." He was remembered as a tactful person, sometimes shy and prone to melancholy, a lover of reading – there is some similarity with Olga's character.Olga did not see Alexander again, but a year later she noted in her diary the anniversary of his arrival:"January 12, 1915.The year that I saw Alexander at Vsevolod's christening.January 15th.The year is consecrated. churches. Alexander.January 17th.Mordvinov and Count Fredericks were having breakfast. And a year ago Alexander. God bless him."It seems that even in the spring of 1916, Pasic expressed the hope that Olga would become the Serbian queen. But in January of this year, the date of the meeting with Alexander was not noted in the diary. At this time, Olga hardly thought about anyone other than Dmitry Shah-Bagov. (By the way, here her fate again intersects with the fate of Tatiana Konstantinovna, who was very friendly with the elder daughters of Nicholas II. Instead of the Serbian prince, she married a simple Caucasian officer for love, and he even served in the Erivan regiment – like Olga's lover. Because She even knew Shah Bagov and calls him a "cute, cute boy" in a letter. Surely Olga was thinking about what could repeat her path).But in 1917 Olga remembers again:"January 17th. Exactly 3 years ago today Alexander Serbsky had breakfast with us." Here the name is also written in cipher, and this is the last encrypted entry in the diary.

Olga Nikolaevna's biographers like to repeat that she wanted to stay in Russia, so she did not marry the Romanian heir Karol. The interest in Alexander the Serbian shows that, most likely, it was not in the country: it was just Karol who was unsympathetic to Olga. I think she understood that sooner or later she would have to leave her homeland. It is unlikely that the rumors had passed her by, she knew who her husbands were supposed to be, and she did not mind falling in love with a cute Orthodox prince. Maybe by the beginning of 17, she returned to thinking about him because someone had dispelled her hopes for a happy morganatic marriage? Although what could be a wedding when the revolution is already at the threshold. What kind of fate would await her in a small semi-literate kingdom, forever torn apart from the outside and from the inside?Alexander married in 1922 the sister of the same Karol (there is a version that he dragged on for so long, because until then he did not believe in the death of Olga). It seems that he became a good family man, ruled his country for more than 10 difficult years. Yugoslavia in the 20s became a fragment of the Russian Atlantis, the center of white emigration. Sometimes there is an opinion that Alexander was so supportive of Russian refugees in memory of his first love – "Olga/Tatiana." But I think Russia meant a lot to him anyway. Alexander was killed in 1934 by a terrorist, his family fled the Nazis during the war and never returned to their homeland. Well, instead of Maria, Olga could become a Romanian widow and exile… No matter how her fate turned out, it would not be easy. The time of the Slavic monarchs has passed.

Thank you for sharing!!

#otmaa marriages

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delicioussshame · 8 months

Text

Crime AU AU, part 9. First new part is 7, so be careful.

He’s being ridiculous and he knows it.

This is nothing new. Shen Jiu has never pretended Yue Qingyuan was his one and only. He had left in the middle of the night more often than Yue Qingyuan can remember, to visit some anonymous conquest or another.

Or his brother. If that was the way Shen Jiu decided to manage his relationship with his twin, and it worked for him, it wasn’t his place to intervene. Their bond had always been… complicated. Yue Qingyuan had no desire to come between them.

If only the same could be said of Luo Binghe.

The man couldn’t be content with the kiss marks he usually bruised on his own fiancé’s neck. No, he also had to brand Shen Jiu in a way he had never allowed before, bite marks so deep they have to have drawn blood, deep imprints of fingernails that took days to fade.

Yue Qingyuan grits his teeth when Luo Binghe shows up with similar marks one day, gingerly hanging on Shen Yuan’s arm like everything was fine, when there was no way the one he called his shizun would treat him this roughly. Is Luo Binghe so talented a lover than he can convince him these were his doings, too lost in the throes of passion to remember acting in such a way?

Yue Qingyuan wouldn’t be surprised. Shen Jiu wouldn’t let him touch him if he weren’t. Not to mention he was raised by Shen Yuan, and thus surrounded by prostitutes. Who knows how many years of experience he had under his belt.

It’s none of his business. He told himself he would stay away from this future tragedy.

He can’t anymore. Sooner or later, Shen Yuan is bound to find out, and this will be the end for the brothers. Shen Yuan is too besotted to forgive such a betrayal by the two persons most important to him. The family will burn down, and the only one who will benefit will be Luo Binghe, all set to take everything over.

It still looks unlikely to him. Luo Binghe has to be a talented actor, but can the borderline obsessive way he trails after Shen Yuan can really be faked? Had the child Yue Qingyuan had grown to know really been playing such a long game?

He remembers Luo Binghe’s eyes glinting with adoration, and he can’t think so.

He also remembers the trail of bodies Luo Binghe left behind as tribute to Shen Yuan.

It’s hard to find a moment where Luo Binghe is both accessible and away from Shen Yuan, but Yue Qingyuan lies in wait until said moment is found. “Luo Binghe, if you would?”

Luo Binghe favors him with a polite smile he learned from his shizun, perfectly charming and utterly false. “Yes?”

What’s the point. “Let’s spare the niceties. If you wanted to take us down, why bother with this convoluted charade? Just murder Shen Yuan in his sleep and be done with it. He’s infatuated enough to let you do it.”

Luo Binghe’s eyes widen in shock. “What? I would never!”

It doesn’t seem faked, but does Yue Qingyuan really know this man? “Why betray him with his own brother then?”

Luo Binghe still looks confused. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Please. Shen Yuan might be blinded by love, but anyone else can see the marks you’ve never bothered hiding. You’re sleeping with Shen Jiu.”

Something appears to click in Luo Binghe’s mind, because the confusion fades, to be replaced by open amusement. “You don’t know. I thought you did, but I appear to have overestimated you. I won’t make that mistake again.”

That’s not comforting. “Enlighten me then.”

“I will. Your misunderstanding will only cause trouble for Shizun. Shen Yuan knows. It was his idea, after all.”

Yue Qingyuan freezes. “You want me to believe Shen Yuan whored you out to buy peace?” Luo Binghe might agree if Yuan did ask, but would Shen Jiu even want that?

If he was allowed to handle Luo Binghe as he wished, maybe…

But that is not the story his body tells.

“Of course not. My husband’s bed is just always open to me, no matter who else is in it.”

Yue Qingyuan’s breath locks in his chest. This was Shen Yuan’s plan…?

Yue Qingyuan is an idiot. It’s so easy to underestimate Shen Yuan. His demeanor is kinder, more patient, gentler than Shen Jiu’s ever was. It had always pushed Shen Jiu to take on the harder jobs, to walk the darker roads, to protect his presumed innocence. In response to this treatment, Yue Qingyuan himself always considered him something close to Shen Jiu’s younger sibling, who needed protection and guidance sometimes.

Shen Yuan is Shen Jiu’s twin, his equal in age and skills. Why would he be above using his partners in this way? How could someone so tainted by their world, in a position to survey everyone’s movement in the casino he rules as a king would, be unaware of his fiancé straying? “I suppose I owe Shen Yuan an apology.” He can’t believe he underestimated a Shen in this way. How mortifying. He should have known better.

“You do, but I suggest you don’t bother making one. It will be easier on everyone were you to continue turning your eyes away.”

Yue Qingyuan remembers bringing his theory to Shen Jiu, and only receiving ‘I have nothing to be ashamed of’ as an answer.

So Shen Jiu hadn’t been lying. How novel.

Still, quite rude of Shen Yuan to arrange another lover for his brother and not even involve Yue Qingyuan in the matter. Words will have to be had.

Yue Qingyuan just has to decide with whom.

#The Scum Villain Self Serving System #Scum Villain #BingQiu #Shencest #LBH/SY/SJ #Crime AU

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auspicious-voice · 2 years

Text

I am having many thoughts about testing my voicebanks lately, but this is mainly about engine noise and other mishaps: maybe it's because I'm so used to using voicebanks that have little to no amounts of engine noise that whenever I use my own, there's always that one sample that gets fucked over with too much engine noise that it sounds unnatural.

More under the cut as I have lots of thoughts about this. This isn't a formal development log, but I supposed it's closely related.

From my experiences, my voicebanks have little engine noise for the most part, but when it comes to encountering such blips in the voicebanks, I have this burning urge to a) manipulate the oto.ini, b) mix the shit out of it, or c) rerecord the sample if nothing else works. There are way less errors now but even then running into them will drive me crazy, and it doesn't make shit better when I'm a perfectionist. That and also having way less time to rerecord nowadays.

That shit aside, I have been listening to other voicebanks lately and I'm sort of starting to realize that even if a voicebank DOES have engine noise being present, they still manage to sound good in the final mix. So I've always wondered, "is engine noise really that detrimental to the quality of a voicebank in the long run?"

I feel like seeing things through the perspective of a perfectionist is only going to make me been more burnt out and I'll probably not have fun developing voicebanks if I keep this mindset. It's probably just that given how genuinely crap my latest voicebank updates were (which were released in 2018) and how there's a significant change of quality in the beta voicebanks, I've been more critical of myself and my voicebanks to the point where I'm stressing out over if these voicebanks actually sound good or not, regardless of engine noise.

But onto other reflections when voicebank developing because I've realized some things in this 6-7 month journey of development.

I'm not really working on these voicebanks for the sake of pleasing other people, but mostly for myself, as I want to develop voicebanks that won't give me a major headache whenever I use them in UTAU. As I've used Maria and Mario's voicebank updates from 2018, I've only gotten more frustrated with their overall quality even they were one of my more ambitious voicebank projects at the time.

And looking back now, it definitely feels I only developed those voicebanks just because a) they had multiexpression capabilities and b) I only wanted to impress people with a shitton of pitches. Without giving those voicebanks proper beta testing and overlooking a plethora of quality-related issues while being infatuated with the idea that a voicebank with many pitches, they ended up sounding terrible, and it took me 3-4 years to realize that.

And to be honest, how did people even deal with these voicebanks? :0c

2018 me wasn't so critical of voicebank issues, and now I'm malding over the slightest issues in Maria's and Mario's latest voicebanks even though they're not that much of a problem in the first place. To be fair, being aware of errors in voicebanks and fixing them will significantly improve the overall quality, but it's just that the moment you start being overly aware of the blips and errors in your voicebanks, it's when the voicebank development begins to be more of a painful labour because you just keep catching so many errors at one that it's painstaking to fix them all by yourself.

Don't get me wrong, I love developing voicebanks, but it's also very time consuming finalizing the voicebanks you want to put up for download. But at least the overall result will be smoother and more high quality I suppose. Maria and Mario's newest voicebanks have been improving over the past few months, and I'm running into less issues even though I feel like I might run into more, but I still need to work on the artwork, demos, and the video itself.

I should probably try and not be so hard on myself just because this and that has an issue that can be easy to fix, because at the end of the day, UTAU is a hobby to me, and it should be fun using it and that I can take a break from it any time. I'll try to take things easier, and try not to stress over the smallest things such as having engine noise in the rendered samples. I hope that with the remaining time that I have, I can still pull everything together and perhaps take a break from developing voicebanks for the rest of the year, even if I still have a long way to go.

#personal #utau #utauloid #voicebank development #ramble #fuwa maria #fuwa mario

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folkloreguk · 3 years

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French Class [7]

A/N: AAAH I apologize in advance for this part bc I feel like it's kinda messy :/ I hope you still like it though?? Lmk what you think! x

genre: optional bias (m) x reader (f), fwb, f2l?, college!au, fuckboy!bias, nerd!reader, angst, H/N is a jealous and drunk fool :/

words: ~ 3.7 k

✽series masterlist✽

taglist (lmk if u wanna be added!): @lovely-ateez, @runaway-fics, @mainexiii, @awfullytiredbuthealing, @erikyoong, @etherealuv, @yeostars, @staysuki, @justcuz-ican, @hyuckthangs, @teenloves, @mexious18-blog, @sunghoonied, @mailobjaeyoon, @tr-wemoon, @prismwon

couldn’t tag: @chorizoek, @r-eadings

H/N’s POV:

Maybe I’ll come ‘round, your text had said. How did you expect him to enjoy the party if you wouldn’t be there? H/N used to make fun of guys who ran after girls like lap dogs. And yet, over time he had become one of them, if not worse. Every text, every possibility of seeing you had him on the edge of his seat in excitement. There was nothing he cared about more than spending time with you. When at first it had been sexual attraction – an obsession with your body and the way you turned him on with the most subtle words and touches – it had changed into something entirely different. The relentless hunger was now occasional, ever so often interrupted by a dire wish to see you smile. A wish to hold you, and to kiss you out of the blue – something he wasn’t allowed to do if it wasn’t for the two of you hooking up. The stupid agreement you had made was starting to feel like torture instead of heaven. He was lucky his poker face was professional, and he had years of practice in flirting and sounding casual even if his heart was beating up to his neck. There was no other way he could have concealed how infatuated he was with you, otherwise.

“H/N, come help me set up the snacks!” Korain shouted from the kitchen. H/N’s friends were throwing a party at their place, and he had shown up early to assist them in preparing everything. With you on his mind – as always – he trotted into the kitchen where a row of bowls was standing out on the counter.

“Just open and pour the bags into the bowls, will you? I still need to get ready,” Korain said. “Chohee said she might be here a bit earlier, and I don’t want to look like this when she’s going to look amazing.”

Korain gestured to his bed hair he probably hadn’t brushed once since getting up and then tweaked the fabric of his sweatpants and his old, baggy tee. H/N wanted to argue that if Chohee really liked Korain, she wouldn’t mind seeing him this way. H/N, for one, couldn’t care less what you wore tonight. As long as you showed up at all, he would be beaming. Strictly speaking, at times when he got to see you wake up, sleep in your eyes and your clothes in a disarray, it spun his head in ways no little black dress could ever do. When he saw you make breakfast in his kitchen, in his shirt, he could barely contain himself.

His daydreams of you were once naughty and gave him boners at random times of the day – and don’t get me wrong, they still were, sometimes – but it was when the domestic dreams had begun, that he realized he was screwed. He didn’t need anybody to tell him how he felt, nor did he have some crazy moment of clarity. There came a point in his days where he didn’t just notice his non-sexual daydreams of you, he invited them. His brain was imagining things like setting up a shared table for dinner or kissing the back of your hand in the dark of a movie theater or playing you a cheesy song that reminded him of you. He wanted to hold your hands from across the library table and have his arm around your shoulders to show you off to the entire campus. But none of it could be real. It all went against the rules.

“Will Y/N be here too?” Korain asked and pulled H/N out of his daydreams. God, I hope so, he thought.

“She said she might be here,” H/N answered.

“Chohee’s always talking about her. And you. About how she thinks Y/N has a crush on you, but she always denies it, saying you’re just friends. Maybe you could try and bring that up tonight?” Korain said, as if discussing your feelings for someone was as easy at conversing about the weather. “Alright, I really have to go get ready now.”

“I’ve been thinking, I might- “ said H/N, but Korain only pat his shoulder.

“Let’s talk later, at the party, okay?” he said, and walked out the kitchen. I might like her, H/N had been meaning to say. I might like Y/N. No. I’m in love with her. No maybes. He could bet all his money on it, that’s how sure he was. But his friend had disappeared and now it was on him to wait until the party began. Left alone with his thoughts.

Of course, you would deny having a crush on him. Because you probably didn’t, he thought. Wouldn’t you search for a smart guy, someone your mother would approve of, and someone who understood your endless talks of nerdy topics? Although sometimes he had no idea what you were on about, H/N was captivated whenever you gave him a lecture about something you had learned. And when he asked you to explain something one more time, you never hesitated, or judged him for it. Your kindness made his heart swell, and only when the first crowd of party guests arrived did he realize he had spent half an hour daydreaming about you. Again.

With the way he kept the front door in his sight at all times, one could have wondered if he was a highly wanted criminal on the run, afraid the cops could barge in at any moment. Some of the girls who tried to flirt with him even asked him about it, but he wasn’t going to confess he was waiting for the love of his life to walk through that very door. With little conviction he returned their flirting. He hated himself for the thoughts he had. Thinking that should you not arrive, he could console himself by taking one of the other girls home instead. They didn’t deserve to be used like that, but he was bitter and so, so in love with you. It was hard to pay any attention to the other girls at all, no matter how sweet they were being.

Flirting back at them, however, came to him as easily as the words to his favorite songs. It posed no challenge, like it did with you. When he had to try hard to make your cheeks heat up, or to lure out a shy smile instead of your genius, quick-witted remarks. There was nothing more exciting to him than to invent new ways in which he could make you flustered.

Right now, it was his turn to be flustered. Because his ex had approached him and was reciting some of her favorite memories she had of their relationship. “Remember our third date…the one that ended with us squished in that tiny dressing room at Victoria’s Secret?” she asked and blinked at him expectantly. He went along with her words and replied something not too direct, but still enough to make her giggle like a little girl.

It was his own fault she was so intent on talking to him. While you had been on your date with the economy-major-guy, H/N had tried to contact his ex again. In hindsight, he thought it pathetic and extremely stupid at that. Nothing would have come of it, anyway. Not while he felt the way he did about you. So it was only lucky his ex hadn’t been free that night. Then he had gotten dangerously close to drowning his feelings in the vodka in his kitchen. Thankfully he had refrained from this, too, because you had shown up afterwards and you had ended up having mind-blowing sex, and he knew for a fact that had he been drunk, he would have blurted out some crazy sentiments he would have regretted saying in the morning.

Sometimes he tried to signal you his emotions, ever so subtly. Waving off your claims when you called him the campus fuckboy or telling you he wasn’t really hooking up with anyone else besides you, it all was an attempt at making you see what he felt for you. He would tell you that you looked pretty, not just so you would understand he liked you, but simply because it had to be said. When he regarded you fixing your hair in the mirror with a frown, he could barely believe you didn’t know how beautiful you were. And he had gotten closer to you during sex. Whether it was voluntary or an instinct that came with being in love, he wasn’t certain. There was nothing like kissing away your moans while he fucked you into a mattress.

He was about to text you – the urge to see you getting unbearable – but didn’t want to sound clingy when you strut through the door. No slow motion or fan blowing your hair around dramatically would have made you look more perfect. The ridiculous pang he felt in his heart when he saw you hug another guy only reminded him of how whipped he was. He reminded himself that he had no right to be jealous. You weren’t his girlfriend, after all. When you then made eye contact with him and made a beeline for him, he was worried he’d be short of words. He needed to pull himself together.

“Hi,” you said, and your smile was magical enough to stir up the butterflies in H/N’s stomach. You pointed at the empty spot on the sofa between H/N and another guy you didn’t know. “Is this seat taken?”

“No,” the guy said, before H/N had time to speak, and the stranger smiled at you in a way that could only mean he wanted to get to know you. But H/N caught your attention by swiftly putting his arm around your shoulder, making the stranger back up and divert his eyes the other way. He had never meant to be the jealous type. It was just that you were finally here, and he was so happy to see you, he couldn’t bare the thought of you running off again. Only when you gave him a funny look H/N realized he needed to calm down if he didn’t want you to get annoyed.

“So, what did I miss?” you asked.

His ex was approaching from across the room again, and before he could have stopped his mouth, he said the stupidest thing. “Kiss me.”

You furrowed your eyebrows, but he was intent on it. “Please. Kiss me. Quick.”

There was a strange emotion that crept over your face, and you seemed to have no clue why he was so set on it. Nevertheless, you did as he asked. Your mouth tasted of watermelon bubblegum, so sweet, so perfect, and he was flying on cloud nine for the short while it lasted. It wasn’t real, though. The thought stabbed his brain like a dagger. When you pulled apart you were grinning, and his ex wasn’t in the room anymore.

“Care to explain why we just did that?” you asked. “You’re diminishing your chances with the ladies in the room.”

He rolled his eyes. “My ex has been trying to get with me again, and I hoped she’d let off if she saw us kiss. And she did.” Then his eyebrows raised. “What do you mean by my chances with the ladies? I was hoping we could go home together.”

“I can’t tonight,” you said, and he had to fight to keep his face straight. “I’ve got to get back to studying first thing tomorrow morning. I just came here to hang out, for a while.”

“Oh,” was all he could muster without sounding like you were ripping out his heart. It wasn’t even your fault. He would never try and get between you and your studies. But what if he could be there? What if he could be the one staying in bed, watching as you climbed up early to bury your head in books? He’d watch you through tired eyelashes, and you’d ridicule him for being so starry-eyed when looking at you. Later he’d bring you tea or coffee and remind you to take a break to eat. Was it ludicrous to obsess over something so domestic? He didn’t feel guilty for it.

All at once, your laugh pulled him out of his daydream, and into a funny story you told him. Over-consciously, he noted how your arm went around his shoulder lazily. And for a while you sat and talked. Occasionally a flirty remark slipped over your lips, and he would always return it. It was idiotic, but he was already worrying about how much he would miss you once you went home. Perhaps his plan of consoling himself with another girl hadn’t been so bad, after all. Just as he had finished the thought, a familiar face walked by and noticed him. The alcohol in his veins made her seem perfectly inviting as a distraction, for later.

“Oh, hey. Y/N, this is Minji,” he said, pointing at the girl. “Minji, this is Y/N. She’s…just a friend.”

Instantly, you removed your arm from his shoulder. There was hidden pain in your gesture, or was it merely wishful thinking on his side? Minji nodded and greeted you, but you only waved her off with a polite smile.

“I’m going to get a drink from the kitchen,” you announced, and before he could have stopped you, you had walked off. For a while he chatted with Minji, because he had no good reason to run after you that wouldn’t create awkwardness. His patience lasted approximately ten minutes. Luckily, a friend waved at Minji from across the room and she excused herself. Although he would never wish her ill, he was glad she was leaving.

Quickly, he made his way to the kitchen, where he found you talking to a guy. Without thinking, H/N smiled at you as he came up to you and wrapped his arm around your waist. He hadn’t meant to look so intimidating, and he hadn’t meant to be an asshole either. Yet, the guy across from you appeared scared and when you turned your attention to H/N, the guy slowly retracted into another circle of chatting people. Guilt crept in on H/N. He was tipsy, and although he knew his drunkenness wasn’t an excuse, it made him want you so much more. Perhaps it was also insecurity making him act crazy. There was always a glimmer of hope in the back of his mind, that you might just like him back. So long as you hadn’t confirmed the opposite, he would live in constant terror that someone else could steal your attention and make you theirs before he could.

“Come with me,” you muttered in his ear. Your hand was around his wrist, and he had no choice but to trot after you like a child. At first, he thought you were going to take him out the front door, but then you made a turn for the stairs. He didn’t need to be a fuckboy to know what it meant when a girl walked him up the stairs. From one second to the other, his mood changed into gleefulness. Had you changed your mind? The mere thoughts of what could happen upstairs could have given him a boner, had he pondered on them for longer. You said nothing, only driving him more insane by the second. The first open door was good enough for you, so you pulled him inside and closed it behind you. Smirking, he reached for your waist, ready to pull you into a kiss.

“Don’t,” you hissed, and he flinched at your angry tone. He kept his hands to himself, kneading them nervously. Shit. This was the clear opposite of what he had anticipated. The two of you had never fought, and hearing your voice, sounding so deeply upset, scared him.

“What do you think you’re doing?” you asked.

“I’m sorry, I thought you wanted to make out- “ he said.

“I don’t mean just now. I mean…what is it you’re trying to achieve by acting all possessive over me in front of random guys? Pretending I belong to you? But the second a pretty girl is in front of you I’m just a friend, aren’t I? What’s that about?”

There was no explaining this, and he knew it. Yet, he would try, pathetically. “I just thought you didn’t want those guys bothering you.”

“I can handle a guy by myself, thank you,” you snapped. “If I needed help, I’d ask. Like you did. Apparently, I’m good enough to be used as an escape from your ex, but when hot Minji came around you wouldn’t even blink when I got up and left.”

“Usedas an escape?” he asked in disbelief. “You didn’t have to kiss me, but you did anyway.”

“That’s because I was trying to be a good fucking friend!” you yelled now, sounding over the music from the party.

“You used me too, don’t you remember?” he countered. “Or did you not show up on my doorstep after your terrible date so I would fuck you and make you feel better?”

You looked taken aback for a moment, knowing he was right, in a way.

“It’s like you’re always trying to get away from me, but you can’t,” he said.

“Oh, fuck you!” you said, every trace of guilt washed away. “Get off your high horse! Isn’t that the whole point of us? That we’re using each other for sex? Nothing more than that, right? If I walked out now, you could go and find the next girl in line to take over instead of me. Didn’t you try to see someone while I was chatting to the guy I went on a date with? It’s all about using people, isn’t it? If things with the guy had gotten more serious for me, you’d have her, ready for you. Don’t you think that’s a little messed up? Leading someone on like that?”

There was truth to your words. He had tried to find someone to date, should you have found someone too and your friends-with-benefits relationship had been over. But he hadn’t led her on. He had been honest in letting the girl know he wasn’t sure if he wanted anything serious. His chest was hurting, and the pain was only making him more furious.

“Yeah, I could have switched you for her,” he said coldly. Was he only trying to hurt you now? Perhaps, but you had hurt him first.

“Right, because that’s all I am to you,” you said, quieter than before.

“That was our plan! You’re my fuck buddy, nothing more!” he raised his voice now, tired of your empty words and signs. “You have no right to accuse me of anything when I’m playing by the rules. The rules you made. Maybe we should go back to the beginning. Start the game over. I don’t even know what we’re arguing about right now.”

“Start over?”

“Go back to when we were just horny for each other and nothing else,” he said, as if that would be possible. As if he could ignore the way your eyes shined, even in the dim light coming from the streetlamps outside. Like he could pretend he didn’t want to hold you and make you forget all about this terrible fight.

“Fine, let’s try,” you said, and he watched in astonishment, as you closed the gap between the two of you. When you tilted your head, he gave you permission by doing the same. When you kissed, with teeth clashing and exhausted sighs mixing up, he swore there were bombs going off somewhere in his head. Alarm bells, too. This was by no means a great idea. But what could have stopped him and his hungry mouth? He backed you against the wall and pressed you into it, hard. Before he had registered it, his hands were pushing up the fabric of your dress and you moaned, sounding so beautiful he could barely believe it. One of his thighs forced its way between your legs while he gripped your waist like his life depended on it.

But then, just as rapidly you had begun to kiss him, you pushed him away. His lungs felt tight when he noticed the affliction and confusion on your face. He wished he could make it go away. But he had caused it, so now his presence only made things worse.

“No- no, I change my mind. This is fucking stupid,” you said. “I can’t do this right now.”

“Y/N,” he said in a gentle tone. Somehow, it seemed that his careful voice hurt you most of all.

“I think we should stop. All of this,” you said. He was beginning to shake his head in disbelief, but you cut him off. “We said there wouldn’t be jealousy, but there obviously is. We should have stopped long ago.”

“But what about starting the game again, from the beginning?” he asked, too afraid of what you would say to even look at you. If you were going to rip out his heart you should have done so quickly, when he wasn’t paying too close attention.

“The game’s over. This is going over both of our heads,” you said. “I- I’m going to go home now.”

So this was heartbreak. H/N had never considered that it could be meant so literally. But he could swear that the muscle inside his chest was convulsing and shriveling as if you had stolen the blood that kept him alive right from his arteries. The pain was sharp like a thousand cuts had been inflicted on his skin, and he struggled for words like your words had taken every of his most elemental abilities.

“I’ll walk you home,” he said.

“No,” you said. “You’re drunk. You’re the one who could need someone to walk you home. And I don’t want you around me right now. Get home safely.”

That was it. No hug. No last, longing look. Just your words stabbing like knives and your ethereal beauty as you turned on your heel and walked from the room, leaving him behind, bleeding out by himself. What had he done?

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pineapple-lover-boy · 3 years

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Can- can I just talk about the Victuuri relationship? Pretty please?

I just…. I’ve never seen a healthy relationship that starts from idolization and a need to get out that has ended in a satisfying way.

Let me elaborate:

We all know that Yuri idolized Victor. It’s why he was so nervous in the beginning and why it took time for them to build on their relationship, he saw Victor as a god.

Victor? He was depressed. He loved the ice so much but he longer found excitement in competitions. He didn’t have any worthy opponents that had a chance of beating him (sorry Chris).

I believe Victor “fell in love” at the banquet. He was attracted to Yuri but, even though he lost, he also saw potential in him. That night was probably the most exciting night for him in a long time. I think he felt genuine affection for Yuri but also saw a way to get out of his predicament.

Then, of course, Yuri didn’t show up the following season (a year had passed before the present timeline). He was most likely annoyed that someone who had gave him excitement didn’t show up. Did he think Yuri had a chance of beating him at first? Probably not. Did he see potential or at least someone he could have fun with during the season? Hell yes!

And then when he saw the video of Yuri skating Stay Close To Me, something that awarded him a gold medal. That’s all he needed. He saw how Yuri not only skated it perfectly but I bet he thought Yuri skated it better. Let’s not forget that emotion is a huge part of skating. If you don’t skate with the passion your supposed to hold for whatever theme you have, your performance can almost seem futile. Victor obviously won because he perfected it but if it was based on how he presented it alone, he would’ve lost. He saw someone worthy of skating an gold medal piece while also having the heart to do it. That’s talent.

Anyways, because of this, their relationship doesn’t hold well in the beginning. He’s passive aggressive towards Yuri because he doesn’t see his own talent and Yuri is just going along for the ride because holy shit it’s Victor fucking Nikiforov.

As they get to know each other and Yuri opens up more (plus Victor getting info on Yuri from the others) Victor starts to see Yuri as an actual person and not someone he can use to project himself onto and then later skate against. And Yuri starts to see him as an actual person too.

I saw on another post talking about how we didn’t see them during the summer and how the end credits of every episode suggest they got to know each other better as both in the credits and in the show they (Yuri) are able to touch each other more. I 100% believe this.

I also believe they might’ve had an argument or two on this topic. It’s not easy to switch from inadvertently seeing someone as anything but a person to an actual person with emotions and feelings. I believe Victor would’ve tried to back away from this subject but Yuri wouldn’t let him. It wasn’t big arguments like in episode 7. It was probably little quarrels that annoyed them both but after having a long conversation they finally started to become more comfortable with each other.

Yuri started letting go of the notion that Victor was a god like creature and Victor saw him as something other than a pawn. Yuri stopped getting as embarrassed with Victor touching him and Victor stopped trying to seduce him as much just so he could see the man from the banquet.

This most definitely leads the way towards a healthier relationship but episode 7 was inevitable. Yuri’s anxiety was at an all time high when he comes out on top. The fact that he needs to stay on top and not mess up is getting to him. As a person with anxiety, it’s pure hell. The thoughts of failing won’t get out of his head and even as he turns off all the monitors he can still hear everything.

Victor takes him away from prying eyes and has no idea what to do. Despite an obvious change that would’ve had to include some emotions from both occurring over the summer, he still has no idea how to help someone in distress.

Then he makes his first mistake. Yuri is visibly shaken by someone’s scores (can’t remember who) and Victor, who is at his wits end, yells at him to stop listening and puts his hands over Yuri’s ears. This tells Yuri how nervous Victor is too and despite knowing that Victor wouldn’t leave him now it shows to him that Victor doesn’t have faith in him (even if he does).

Victor tried to shatter Yuri’s heart. He must’ve expected Yuri to maybe sign heavily but tell him that he’ll do everything in his power to win (probably something that’s happened with him and Yakov). Instead he see’s the consequences of his carelessness. Yuri rightfully lashes out at him and even through all that Victor stills says “should I kiss you?”. Idk what Yuri was thinking but if I were him I would be extremely offended that Victor would try and use me like some doll he can play with and can assume that physical affection and love can fix everything, which was probably what Yuri was thinking.

There’s something off about Yuri and Victor when they emerge but Yuri is surprisingly better now. Cathartic crying can do wonders, kids. There’s also my favorite part of the entire show (couldn’t find a gif):

*head jab* “Hey, fuck you.”

*more head jabs* “Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. I know you don’t like this you unempathetic dicknip.”

*head pat* “You’re forgiven.”

We all know what happens next: Yuri ends his love story with Victor’s signature move and Victor kisses him out of joy and the need to one up him (with love, of course).

I’m gonna get a little sloppy here with the timeline because I have the memory of a female protagonist that needs to go back to work to get something only to accidentally bump into the jerk CEO of which she will develop a toxic relationship for fan service, so forgive me.

Gonna skip ahead to the scene where Yuri tells Victor that he’s leaving skating, and basically Victor too. (At this moment I realized I’ve been spelling Viktor with a c and not a k which is really fucking with my brain but it’s too late to go back). Victor starts crying and realizes just how Yuri felt when he was rejecting him.

I believe Yuri found some light in the situation because of that fact, which Victor was not having. They’ve been closer than ever now. They’ve kissed, they’ve also announced they they’re getting married, so what the hell?!

Yuri, as we know, feels he’s keeping Victor from the ice. Victor, while he misses the ice and wouldn’t mind being competitive again, has found meaning and if he’s going to be Yuri’s coach to stay where he is than so be it.

He wanted to coach Yuri because he wanted a worthy competitor and while he still wants that, what matters most now is his relationship with Yuri. If he stops being Yuri’s coach and Yuri goes off the ice he knows it will be the end. Yuri loves the ice too and I’d bet he’d try to distance himself from Victor as to not feel regret from leaving without actually knowing that he’s doing it.

They’ve grown so much at this point. But that doesn’t mean it’s over. After all they’ve been through Yuri doesn’t realize that consequences of parting from one another. While being too dependent on your spouse isn’t good, it’s what they both need right now. They are what caused the other person to be happy again and while I hate those types of storylines this one executed it perfectly.

I find Victor’s silent plea to Yurio absolutely heartbreaking. He knows it’s bad to put pressure on people but now he’s doing that to a 15 year old boy. He’s putting his relationship and his life into this child’s hands because he knows there’s nothing else he can do.

I do think Yurio had a crush on Yuri but even if he didn’t: Yuri has taught him so much. He, although being an ass most of the time, has really come to love Yuri as family. It’s clear that Yurio was always lonely (Otabek being his first friend and all) but once he came to Japan and lived, truly lived there, he wasn’t lonely anymore.

Yurio wins, Yuri gets silver and all’s well that ends well.

I guess my point of this was to show how well the relationship in YOI was. I could’ve included some more detail on some points but I usually write stuff in one take (it’s very hard to revise without my mind shutting on itself).

I just love how an implicitly toxic relationship can come out so healthy. They don’t do any of that miscommunication bullshit and when they do it’s because the characters don’t know what to do or how to handle something. Like humans do!

They could’ve easily made this the hot famous guy thinks the kawai girl boy is just so adorable and the kawai girl boy is absolutely infatuated with the hot guy. Hijinks ensue which includes the kawai girl boy thinking the hot guy is in love with someone else. She He gets pushed into thinking that she’s he’s more independent in the end and happily ever after for the couple that will divorce in less than five years! Yay!

Seriously, I thought that was what was going to happen but YOI subverted my expectations so much. They are people that grew from their bad mindsets. And you know what? Yuri still has anxiety! Victor is still bad with handling emotions! And that’s ok! We don’t change that quickly. It takes time and hopefully another season.

I’m definitely using this show as a template for healthy relationships. It’s so hard for me to properly write them when I’ve never been in one and I’m not given the chance to see it happen in different environments (when searching it up all I get is “they trust each other. They blame each other. They’re compassionate.” Like ok but can you show me how?)

Yuri!!! On ice…. I love you so much. You have done so much for my mental health and my writing. Thank you.

#yuri on ice #yuri katsuki #katsuki yuri #victor nikiforov #viktor nikirofov #please tell me if you want me to elaborate on some sections #long post #yurio plisetsky #yuri plisetsky #healthy relationships

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julesclues · 3 years

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She Wasn’t You

Warnings: nothing that I can think of

Word count: 2.03k

Pairings: jj maybank x reader

Summary: JJ goes on a date with a girl but when it ends early, you ask him why and hidden feelings arise.

You and JJ have known each other for years. In a way, he was your first friend. You had met him in the playground when you were only 5 years old. You had slid down the slide, but winded up busting your ass on the way down. John B and JJ came running up to you, as tears fell down your face. Ever since then, the three of you were inseparable. A couple of years later, you met Kiara and Pope. But it wasn’t until a year ago where you had developed a crush for the blonde surfer. And it has only gotten worse over time.

“You have a what?!” Kiara yells, making you slap her mouth shut. “Yes Kie, okay? I have a crush on JJ! Please just don’t tell anyone, okay?” She paces around her room, running her hands through her hair. But because of her curls, she didn’t really get very far. “Y/n, this is crazy. You know the no-pouge-on-pouge macking rule! Why would you do this?” You sigh and fall back on the bed. “I didn’t want to Kie! It just happened. Besides, it’s not like he likes me back. It’s just a stupid crush, it’ll go away eventually.” But it didn’t. Days turned into weeks, which turned into a year.

1 year, 7 months, and 12 days. But who’s counting, right?

You had no idea if the boy liked you though. JJ Maybank was a boy of flirting. If she had boobs, she had JJ’s attention. Kiara says it’s different with you, but you can’t really tell. You love JJ to death but whenever he flirts with you, you can’t help but think it’s just a joke. That’s his personality. It’s who he is. Sometimes you think he can’t help it. He had always been there for you, no matter what. You had only gotten into a small fight once. It wasn’t even that major.

6 months ago

“John B, relax! If I wanna fuck around, let me fuck around! I’m not hurting anyone!” jj screams at John b, while the rest of you just watch. “Why do you keep doing this, huh jj? Why don’t you try to get your life together and maybe settle down!?” John B yells back, causing your heart rate to pick up. You saw both sides of the argument, but you didn’t want to pick sides. “Fuck off John B! Let me do what I want to do!” jj heads toward the door, but John B winds up saying something that tips jj off like you’ve never seen him. “If you keep going down the road you are now, you’re going to end up just like your dad!” Everyone gasps in disbelief as jj runs toward John b and slams him against the wall. “jj stop it!” You yell, but he turns back to you. “Stay out of this Y/n!” This causes John b to get an upperhand and he pushes jj to the ground. You run up to them, throwing John b off of him. “What is the matter with you two?!” You scream, as Pope comes up behind John b and grabs him. Neither one of them respond. “Pope, get him out of here. jj,” you say, as you grab his hand to help him up. “Come with me,” you say with anger. “But-“ he starts, but you shoot him a glare that shuts him up almost immediately.

Shutting the door behind you, you hear the bed creak as he sits down. “What’s the matter with you?” You yell, as he runs his hand down his face. “What’s the matter with me? Did you hear what John B said to me? Why is it any of his business what I do?” JJ huffs, crossing his arms in front of him. His eye follow you as you pace back and forth across your room. You stop in your tracks and walk in front of the blonde. “He’s just looking out for you! I get it’s your life and the thing he said about your dad was shitty, but he’s your best friend. He needs to understand your point of view, but try to understand his too.” You finish talking, and sit down next to him. He stays silent, but his eyes are screaming. “I hate when you’re right,” he smiles, making you chuckle. “What can I say? It’s the worst thing about me.”

“And the best,” he adds on. You roll your eyes, trying to ignore the butterflies that almost made you throw up. JJ gets up from your bed and puts his hand on the knob. Before opening it though, he turns to you. “Thank you Y/n.” And with that, he exits your room to go talk to John B. You couldn’t help but feel kind of upset. You didn’t want JJ to settle down with anyone. You wanted it to be you. But if he was happy, then so were you. And that was enough in your book.

So now, 6 months later, JJ has rarely been sleeping around. He actually listened to John B, which confused all of the Pouges. It might have even confused JJ a bit. You were all at a kegger. Smiling, laughing, and definitely drinking. You were having a blast. Until you weren’t. “Guys!” JJ runs up, panting. “Woah blondie, relax. What’s going on?” You ask, and he turns to you smiling. “I’m going on a date tomorrow at 1 o’clock! Met this hot chick! Her name is Leslie and she...” JJ’s voice fades out from your ears and you just stare at the fire in front of you. He met a girl. A hot one. He even knows her name. And he’s going on a date with her. There was no chance for you. You get up from where you’re sitting, feeling Kie’s eyes on you the entire time. JJ abruptly stops talking and turns to you. “Where are you going y/n?” He asks, and you turn to him. “Gotta go. See you guys tomorrow. You know, family stuff,” you say, trying not to make the pouges suspicious. But Kiara knew the real reason. And JJ definitely wasn’t buying into your story. He stopped talking about the girl and sat down in your previous spot next to Kie. “Is she okay?” He asks with sincere eyes, looking at the group. “I’m sure she’s fine,” Pope says while taking a sip of his beer. “No she wasn’t, didn’t you see her face? She looked really sad,” Sarah says, countering Pope. “Maybe I should go after her,” JJ whispers loud enough for everyone to hear. As he gets up, Kie grabs his hand to stop him. “Don’t,” was all she said. JJ didn’t question it, but he sat back down. He knew that Kie knew what was wrong with you, but didn’t want to pry. You would tell him eventually. You were his best friend afterall.

Tomorrow eventually came. After a night of crying your heart out for a boy that you considered your best friend, you checked your phone for the time. It was 1:03. JJ was probably on his date by now. You hated how infatuated you were with the Maybank boy, but you couldn’t help it. He made you feel things you’ve never felt for anyone else. You couldn’t explain it, but you loved him more than you loved yourself. And it made you crazy.

It was now 2:19 and the boy was still on your mind. Your parents were home, so at least you could wallow in self misery by yourself. You jump on the couch and turn on the tv, trying to find anything to distract you from JJ. From the girl he was with. He was probably kissing her. Maybe they’ll get married, you think. But you laugh at your mind and it’s restless thoughts. This was JJ you were talking about. Dating was barely on his mind, let alone marriage! You were getting ahead of yourself. You finally find a movie you want to watch, and hit play. Not even 10 minutes into the movie, someone was knocking on your door. With a loud groan, you pause the movie and walk over to the door. Maybe your parents were back and forgot the keys. Opening the door, you made eye contact with the one person you were trying to avoid all day.

“JJ?” You ask in disbelief. Looking at the clock next to you, you realize that the date only lasted an hour. Which was practically nothing. “You’re back so soon?” You say more like a question. “Can I come in?” He asks in a low voice. You move out of the way so he could walk in. He goes straight for the couch and plops down on it. Confused, you follow him and sit right next to him. “JJ what’s going on? How was the date?” He sighs and looks up at you. “Can I be honest?” He asks, making you nod. “It sucked.” A part of you wanted to jump up and down and throw a party. But you kept it cool, trying to conceal the excitement you felt. “What? Why? You seemed so excited last night?” JJ starts tracing circles along your couch with his finger. Something he did when he was nervous. You noticed.

“I know but I realized she was just.. hot. Her personality wasn’t really what I was looking for, I guess? I don’t know Y/n. She wasn’t what I wanted.”

“What was wrong with her?”

“Nothing was wrong with her at all. It’s just.. she wasn’t..” he stutters, trying to find the words to explain why she wasn’t enough for JJ. But the truth is, she probably was enough. She was pretty, she made JJ laugh, and she was actually very loyal! But in JJ’s mind, he just wasn’t feeling it. It wasn’t right. “I– ugh. I don’t know.” He runs his hands through his hair, which was something he did that always gave you butterflies. “Well maybe you need to just meet someone else!” You say with enthusiasm, trying to cheer JJ up. But he shakes his head with a “tsk” and stands up quickly. You look up at him with confusion. “Why JJ?”

“Because I know they wouldn’t be good enough.”

“What? JJ listen to yourself. You’re saying some girl wouldn’t be enough, yet you haven’t even met them yet!”

“She just wouldn’t be, okay Y/n? Quit it. I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”

“No JJ, I won’t quit it!” You yell, standing up to face him. “She was good for you! You were so excited! What happened? Just tell me, you know! Deep down you know. You wouldn’t just waste a date on some–“

“She wasn’t you.”

You stop talking and just look up at JJ in disbelief. You couldn’t believe it. JJ Maybank was actually into you too. He ditched his date because she wasn’t you. “I’m sorry if you don’t want to hear that y/n, but it’s you. I love you and she wasn’t you. The thing wrong with her was that it wasn’t you sitting across from me in the diner. It wasn’t you telling me jokes. It wasn’t you telling me that I was handsome. I want it to be you.” You smile and chuckle softly. “I thought you didn’t like sharing your feelings,” you whisper, talking a step towards the boy. “Only for you princess.” He puts his left hand on your right cheek and looks deep into your eyes. “Can I kiss you y/n?” Without answering, you slam your lips into his, making him stumble a bit. You smile to yourself as he wastes no time kissing you back. You couldn’t believe in a million years that he would like you back. No, not like. Love. He was in love with you.

And this kiss was one of the many things he would do to prove that to you.

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the-witty-pen-name · 3 years

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Deadbeat Pt. 7

Lee Bodecker x F!Reader

18+ ONLY

Warnings: age gap (reader is 21), fluff, angst, cursing, abandonment, toxic parent, violence, toxic siblings, infatuation, cheating/divorce, insecurity, mild housewife kink, mentions of prostitution, mentions of alcohol, corrupt official, fake relationship, jealousy

Word Count: 2.5k

Summary: You work at the bar at the edge of town, the Sheriff is going through a divorce and needs to rent a room.

A/N:

IMPORTANT UPDATE

I made a Google form to be added to my taglists, so if you want to be added, the link is in my bio. I’ll only be adding people to the list if they requested to be added by filling out the form! This way all of the requests are just in one place so I don’t miss requests! Thank you!!!

I’m sorry for this chapter being shorter than normal, but it is more of a transitional chapter to set up some new stuff! I’m trying a new writing style in this chapter and this is why the word count is shorter. I’m nervous about posting this chapter honestly, since I tried something different. The following chapters will be back up to 3.5-4k as usual! This story is not over!

Thank you all so much for reading and sharing my work. Everyone whose reached out and told me how much they love the story really makes my day, oh my gosh!! I love you all so much, I’m so thankful.

Address mentioned is completely made up.

This is unedited, and I missed anything I should include as a warning let me know! I hope you all enjoy!

Tags and Requests are OPEN

Part One // Part Two // Part Three // Part Four // Part Five // Part Six

Lee never stopped telling you how much he loved you. At first, you had thought it was a spur of the moment exclamation but you were mistaken. When you realized he meant it, you reciprocated telling him you loved him too, making him the happiest man in the world. It all happened so fast, and your relationship was evolving quickly.

Maybe living together played a factor in how quickly the relationship progressed. It’s hard to just be dating someone you already live with and can’t take out on proper dates. It made everything else happen faster. He wished he could spoil you and take you to restaurants and walk into a room with you on his arm, but he couldn’t yet.

But from that moment on, he never stopped telling you. He said the phrase probably every moment he could manage. Every time he called from his office; he wouldn’t hang up without muttering the phrase. He’d tell you that he loved you before he left the house, or he’d just announce it unprompted when you both were home together, like it was some epiphany or declaration. He’d love to whisper it to you, especially at night with you pulled tightly to his chest.

He made sure he’d tell you in nonverbal ways as well, always letting you know he was thinking about you. Somehow, you’d end up with flowers on your desk at work at least once a week as well, never with a card. He’d cook, and on his days off, he’d spend them with you or he would surprise you by fixing things on the house. Never in a million years had you ever expected Lee Bodecker to be such a romantic, and when you’d joke about it, he’d say,

“You give me a reason to be, doll.”

It was thrilling, having someone to love and to have those feelings reciprocated. The ability to just be able to give and receive love was something he was never able to manage, perhaps it was just never the right person, or perhaps he had always been too selfish.

Now for the first time in a very long time, he wasn’t thinking about himself.

You gave him purpose and something worth fighting for.

“When this whole thing is over and we’re out of this town, I’m gonna marry you,” he said rubbing your arm as you lay in bed cuddled up to his side. You lay your arm across his tummy and rest your head on his chest. You hum in agreement, resting your eyes, both of you waking up earlier than you needed and you were enjoying the peaceful moment of the morning together.

“I hate seeing you with that Russel kid,” he’ll mutter, possessively pulling you closer, you could feel the vulnerability in his voice.

The past weeks have been really hard on Lee. It bothered him more and more each day, knowing Arvin was the one who got to drive you home from work and just being out and about with you. He knew you were his, and he never didn’t trust you. But you were so blind to the boy’s obvious feelings for you. It was something that would eat at him at night.

He couldn’t even blame you, if Arvin was able to sweep you away from him. Arvin was a good kid- took care of his family, worked a decent job, went to Church, and he was your age. He was much better looking in the traditional sense than Lee as well. Plus, you had a history. The boy was your first love and no one forgets their first love.

He knew you didn’t look at Arvin the same way Arvin looked at you, but he was always worried that a shift could come. If that damned reporter wouldn’t leave town and the more time you spent with Arvin, the more you’d see how much you’d actually want to be with him instead. You always told Lee he was the one you wanted and he believed you, but he worried that you would change your mind. He was so insecure, and he felt guilt, and he knew that he didn’t deserve to be happy, that he didn’t deserve your affection.

Sometimes he couldn’t let himself relax. Scenarios of all the different reasons you could leave him for polluted his mind and he hated how it took him out of being in the moments he just wanted to enjoy. He’d see you in his mind, happy with Arvin, marrying him instead and creating all those experiences with Arvin instead of him.

“He’s just my friend,” you reiterate, probably now for the millionth time. You were patient, and it never seemed to bother you, that the two of you ending up having this same conversation over and over. He needed the constant reassurance, and he hated the fact that he did.

“I want you, Lee,” you’ll mumble affectionately, trying to shower him with compliments and praise, to lift him up when he got down like this. “I don’t want any other man,” you’d affirm.

“This town is poison,” Lee mutters, looking out the window, the blinds pulled back as the sun is steadily rising. “Everything feels like it’s tainted,” he observes.

“Except us,” you correct him. He nods, but he knows his statement especially applies to him.

“Except you,” he sighs, his fingertips tracing circles on your bare shoulder.

“You don’t think you’ve ruined me, Sheriff?” you tease, making him smile, gradually pulling him out of his state. You’d lean up and kiss him, and the sensation would help his thoughts fade away for a few minutes. The feeling of your lips and soft skin against his own just putting his mind at ease, using his other senses to just keep his mind at bay.

He’s not sure if you realize how much he means it when he talks about escaping away from the town and marrying you. He thought about it all the time and it was what he was working toward. He knew even if he managed to go straight, if when Curtis left town, if the case around your mom was resolved, the town would still eat you up. The image of you both would be sullied. Reputation was crucial for survival in a town like this. You’d already been subjected to it before your relationship started.

He knew the solution was simple. He needed to take you away from Ross County, move to a new town where no one knew you both. It would just be a Sheriff and his new bride looking for a place to settle down. No rumors, or peeping eyes, or reporters, or exes, no corruption- just the two of you. Get a house, maybe start a family if you wanted that too.

He hoped you did. He’d be content either way, but he wanted a big family. His growing up was much less than ideal and it was just him and his sister. He loved the idea of a bigger family. He loved the image of having a house that was loud in a different way than what he grew up in. He often worried if he’d be a good father, but he never once doubted how excellent of a mother you would be if you wanted.

The only thing he wanted in his future was you, and everything else would be a blissful bonus of things he also doesn’t deserve. But to him you deserved the world and he simultaneously wanted to give you everything but then at the same time he felt like he would hold you back. You were young and had so many good years ahead of you. He couldn’t imagine you’d want to waste the rest of your life or even the rest of your twenties with him.

You could get a job doing anything you wanted and he could run for Sheriff in the new town maybe, or he could do something else. It didn’t matter to him anymore really. The time he’s been with you has really helped him see what is actually important. It was the only thing he wanted. He wanted to be able to give you that because he knew that you deserved it and more than he’d ever be able to give you.

Laying in bed with you on this lazy morning, reminded him of the last time he was there when you were still bartending. It was the first time that pesky day dream of his started. It was something a lot bigger now than it was then. He loved you, and he was relieved he could say it to you now, and he wanted to settle down. This backwards way the two of you got together was a mess but it was yours. He wouldn’t trade it for anything, but he knew he needed to make things right.

He had been so blind, for so long, and he finally started to feel like he could be someone he actually wanted to be.

All he needed was time and he could set it all straight.

***

Arrest of Pimp in Knockemstiff, Ohio Reveals Corruption of Town Sheriff

By: Henry Curtis

Sheriff of Ross County, Lee Bodecker, has been allegedly involved in the coverup of a local brothel, run by Leroy Brown. Brown and several of his associates were arrested on Wednesday night by local police for drug possession and possession of illegal firearms. As the group resisted arrest, there was a shoot out at a small bar in Meade, which was revealed to serve as a front for their operation. Seven men, including Brown, were arrested Wednesday night for questioning by the local police.

While giving his statement, Brown confessed to the charges and in hopes of a lesser sentence, cooperated with police and provided names of all involved in the underground prostitution ring. He provided the police with twelve names, including that of the local Sheriff Lee Bodecker and his sister Sandy Henderson, who has since also been apprehended by the local authorities.

Sandy Henderson was apprehended on Thursday morning, and made bail for $500 that Saturday. Henderson and her husband, both denied an opportunity to provide a statement. The pair only stated they will be promptly returning home and want to put this behind them.

Although there has been no release of his official statement as of yet regarding this alleged involvement, Bodecker was taken into custody the next morning, apprehended by his deputies from his home. Deputy Bill Thomas has since announced that the Sheriff will be subject to a trial in the near future, and for now faces an indefinite suspension from his post until his innocence has been proven. Deputy Thomas has also said that regardless of the outcome of the trial, Bodecker will be unable to run for reelection next term.

With this new development, it is also worth noting that the Sheriff is a tenant of (Y/N) (Y/L/N), the daughter of Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker who is currently wanted by law enforcement for embezzling thousands from her husband Harvey Tucker’s company, Tucker Brokerage, and then fleeing with her sixteen-year-old son. When police arrived at her home Thursday morning to apprehend the Sheriff, deputies on scene took an official statement from (Y/L/N), where she denied knowledge of the Sheriff’s involvement in any of the alleged criminal activities nor any knowledge regarding her mother or brother’s whereabouts.

Woman Wanted for Embezzling Funds from Tucker Brokerage Arrested in Indiana

By: Henry Curtis

Former resident of Knockemstiff, Ohio, Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker was arrested in South Bend, Indiana yesterday morning before dawn. Being able to identify her as a wanted person, Este and Harold Turner, owners of the Sunnyside Motel where (Y/L/N)-Tucker had been staying for about three days prior to the arrest, notified the local authorities she was staying in one of their rooms. She also was accompanied by her sixteen-year-old son.

The boy’s older sister has now become the boy’s sole guardian and he has since returned to his hometown. According to the police, the boy was completely cooperative and they believe he had no knowledge of his mother’s crimes. In a statement given the night of the arrest, the boy told police he believed they were running from his step-father, as his mother insinuated, she had been a victim of domestic abuse. There is no evidence yet as to whether her statement is true, but there will be an investigation of husband, Harvey Tucker, to discover if this claim is true.

Both children of Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker have not agreed to speak about their mother or the situation to anyone except police. Daughter, (Y/N) (Y/L/N), said when she arrived in Indiana to pick up her brother, seemed to only care about getting her brother home safely. Locals report she never asked to see her mother, and only focused on her brother.

As of now, (Y/L/N)-Tucker will remain in the custody of the South Bend Police until they are ready to transport her to Columbus, Ohio where she will face jail time and then eventually a trial.

Corruption in Knockemstiff High School Staff, Principal Arrested for Illegal Distilling- Sheriff Involved in Cover Up

By: Henry Curtis

Principal of local high school, Mark Cunningham, was arrested today after local police discover an illegal distillery on his residence. Police had retrieved a warrant to search Cunningham’s land after receiving an anonymous tip from a source close to the Principal.

Following his arrest, Cunningham admitted to the felony, but also claimed Ross County’s previous Sherriff, Lee Bodecker, had prior knowledge of the still, and in exchange for his silence, he demanded Cunningham offer a secretarial job at the high school to his landlord, (Y/N) (Y/L/N), who is the daughter of Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker, who recently was tried for embezzlement.

The vice-principal of the high school, Meredith Lively, has stepped forth as interim principal until the position can be filled, and ensured the press (Y/L/N) had been fired effective immediately, despite her claims of being unaware any such deal had conspired. Police have found no evidence to contradict (Y/L/N)’s statement, and in an official statement taken from Bodecker, he confirmed that it was part of the deal she not be made aware of the circumstances.

New Sheriff Elected to Ross County

By: Henry Curtis

Former Deputy Bill Thomas has been elected Sheriff of Ross County. Following the trial of former Sheriff Lee Bodecker, who had been found guilty of all charges, Bodecker was barred from office, and given a five-year sentence.

Deputy Thomas in an acceptance speech during a recent town hall meeting, ensured residents of Knockemstiff that “one bad apple doesn’t spoil the whole bunch” and the Sheriff’s department under new control will keep the town safe, and clean of crime and corruption. When asked by reporters how he felt about Bodecker, Thomas only described his situation as “unfortunate.”

There has been no other evidence of corruption within Ross County Sheriff’s Department although the investigation is still ongoing. When asked during his trial if he received any corroboration from any other law officials, Bodecker stated he never involved other members of the force with his wrongdoings.

REAL ESTATE

Room Available for Rent in Knockemstiff, Ohio

$50 monthly rent (utilities included)

1 Bedroom (250 sq. ft.), furnished

Private bathroom with shower

4 Birch Street

Knockemstiff, Ohio

Please call the following number with serious offers. Price negotiable.

PART EIGHT

Taglist

@scar-is-bi @jiminlife2k18 @asylummaniac01 @rosalynshields @charmed-asylum @jamesbuchananbuckybarnes1917 @alexandrathegreat3 @hersilencedscreams @malar-region @purplerain85 @vesper852 @smilewolfdolan @softshell-taco @champagnebucky @lilacmeadows @mollygetssherlockcoffee

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drama-pop · 2 years

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Dramas I Watched in 2021

Happy New Year! Here are the dramas I watched in 2021 and what I thought of them.

Hotel Del Luna

7.5/10

1st watch – Wow. I don’t know quite what I was expecting from this drama, but it was so different! And I mean that in a good way. Man Wol reminded me a lot of Moon Young of It’s Okay to Not Be Okay (which I know, chronologically, should be the other way around) and I still had love in my heart for IU from Dream High, otherwise I might not have warmed to her as quickly as I did. The mystery of the hotel, Man Wol, and the ghostly hotel staff was well done and the romance between our leads was touching. What shocked me the most was that drama had some hard truths that it really stuck to (I won’t elaborate in case you haven’t seen it). I think that added to the charm, though, and will make it stay in my heart for a long time to come.

Tale of the Nine Tailed

7/10

1st watch – Kim Bum is back, friends! Hello! He was fantastically bratty as Lee Rang and I enjoyed seeing Lee Dong-wook again. The show reminded me a little of The King: Eternal Monarch in that the guy has this long-standing love for this girl they’ve just met and the girl kind of just goes with it. On one hand, shallow. On the other hand, would I reject a lovestruck Lee Dong-wook?? It was a darker, more mythology-based drama than I was expecting, but I actually really love learning about Korean folklore. It didn’t stick to its guns the way that Hotel del Luna did, but 1) I’m going to have to let that go and 2) the way the show wrapped up was pretty nice (with an opening for a sequel). I like that this show had so much to do with the redemptive power of love. I’m a sucker for character transformations!

Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo

8/10

1st watch – After the dark trio that was Goblin, Hotel del Luna, and Tale of the Nine Tailed, Weightlifting Fairy was like sunshine. I love me some dark dramas, but it was also nice to lighten up a little and enjoy some college romance fluff. I think I am certifiably in love with Nam Joo-hyuk. I have to say, it was a little jarring to see Lee Sung-kyung in this after Cheese in the Trap, but she made a lovable heroine and it was a testament to her acting that she can convincingly play such different characters. I love Kang Ki-young and he was incredibly charming as Bok Joo’s uncle. The characters were so cute and added to the storytelling. Bok Joo’s infatuation with the doctor was so scream-worthy because it was so relatable and so awkward at the same time. This show just captured what it’s like to be unsure of yourself as a young adult and how you come into your own through those youthful experiences.

Descendants of the Sun

6.5/10

1st watch – Finally watched a Song Joong Ki drama! He did not disappoint. Descendants of the Sun was a little cheesier than I expected it to be, but that doesn’t mean that I disliked it! Maybe I’m just exhausted and skeptical, but I didn’t swoon over any of the romances in this one like I have in other shows. I liked the way that the leads grew to appreciate each other and how they learned there is more than one way to be a hero. It’s a drama worth watching and had some fun moments. The guys have a fun bromance, which is always a win! Why can’t I remember more about this drama?

Hwarang

6.5/10

1st watch – Ok, I’ll come right out and say that I watched this for V (which is why I was a little sad when he wasn’t in the first few episodes like I was expecting). I don’t know why I was expecting a super serious drama, but this is not one! It was almost a little too silly for my liking, if I’m being honest, but I found myself laughing regardless and really endeared to the characters. There is a climactic scene at the end of the series that had me fooled. Watch it without taking yourself too seriously and it’s a fun ride!

Mr. Sunshine

7/10

1st watch – Ever watched a drama and thought, “love triangles are nice but what about a love pentagon?!” If so, watch Mr. Sunshine. It’s a beautifully shot drama that explores a different time period than any of the historical dramas I’ve seen before, not that I’ve seen a lot. The characters were tragic and complex (and so attractive…like, why???). The theme of revenge and mercy were intriguing and painted every character gray rather than firmly on one moral side or the other.

True Beauty

7/10

1st watch – Another cute breath of fresh air! School dramas are just their own brand of fun. Bring on the brooding but softhearted guys and the awkward but lovable gals! We love it! Also, I think I have a disease called “falling for the second male lead” but that’s another story. This drama had some laugh-out-loud ridiculous moments, as I would expect from a drama set in a high school. The bullying did get to be pretty dark and hard to watch though. Overall a fun and generally lighthearted drama!

Hospital Playlist 1 & 2

8/10

1st watch - Let me come out and say that I am an incredibly squeamish person. Incredibly. There were definitely scenes where I missed the dialogue because I was looking away and couldn’t read the subtitles. That being said, it is a really heart-warming series and I’m glad I watched it! Being in the medical field is full of joys and sorrow, sometimes on the same day. I don’t often cry watching TV, but this had me in tears a few times, for heartbreaking moments as well as beautiful I-love-humanity moments. The 5 main characters are each quirky and lovable in their own way. I had a new favorite doctor each episode, I think! The second season has more of a focus on the love lines for each doctor, but does expand upon their group dynamics too. Bonus for ARMY, BTS is referenced a few times in the show (first season).

Squid Game

9/10

1st watch – THIS SHOW. This is not the typical drama that I watch, but my gosh was it engaging and horrifying. Nearly everyone and their dog watched this drama, it seems! I have to say, it was really fun to see it take the world by storm. The show was beautifully shot and soundtracked and the actors were phenomenal. I can be a bit squeamish to gore, but I didn’t have much of a problem with the show (admittedly, my brother told me to look away during 2 specific scenes). In the first episode, we see an organizer, so to speak, sit and watch the game play out on his TV. We watch him watch the bloodbath with nonchalance and at the same time, is he us in that moment? It’s thought provoking and worth all the hype.

Thanks for reading! As always, I love drama recommendations, so send them my way if you’ve got them. I hope everyone has a wonderful year! Stay healthy :)

#kdrama #hotel del luna #tale of the nine tailed #weightlifting fairy kim bok joo #Descendants of the Sun #hwarang #Mr. Sunshine #true beauty #hospital playlist #squid game #2021 #review #happy new year!

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seasidepierre · 3 years

Text

sunkissed face - charles leclerc

FORMULA ONE DRIVERS MASTERLIST

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

summary: You’ve been in love with your best friend Harrison for quite a while now but when Tom, Harrison and Tuwaine go on a trip to Monaco for the F1 Grand Prix, you’re quick to tag along, even though it means spending time with Harrison’s girlfriend.

warnings: Will make you want to move to Monaco asap.

words count: 7.2k

a/n: Thank you very much to @borhapstyles for sending me this request! I’ve loved mixing Tom’s world with the F1′s and having him visit Monaco for the last GP was the perfect occasion for it! I hope you’ll like it! Xx

The sun reflected very nicely in the small waves of the Monaco harbor, creating golden sparkles, like glitters peppered on the surface of the water. The boat Tom had rented was amazing, pretty small but shiny and it allowed you to soak in the sun for as much as you could. It’s not like you could do that back in London, so you might as well enjoy it while you could.

The small group of you was pretty quiet and calm, a stark contrast compared to the day prior. You had been dragged to a gala event, with a dress you had spent hours looking for in the different high-end shops you had found in town and truth be told, when you thought it would be a very glamour event, it ended up being a bit boring. There wasn’t much to do except watching and listening, when what you really wanted was explore the city and enjoy your time with your best friends. One more than the others, if you were completely honest.

You had fought quite a lot to be there, which is why you hadn’t complained one bit through the entirety of the weekend. When you’d heard the guys were planning on visiting Monaco for the Grand Prix, you’d been butthurt not to be included in the plans. Truth be told, it wasn’t unusual for them to skip you in the vacation preparations. It’s not like you were trying to tag along and put your nose where it wasn’t supposed to be, but boys will be boys, and being the only girl of the gang meant you were regularly forgotten about. If you were completely truthful, it hurt sometimes, not to be considered the same or one of them all. But that was what you were used to and when you’d caught a word about it, you’d manifested your will to come with them.

Tom hadn’t said much. You knew it probably was an invitation from a brand but you foolishly thought maybe it could be extended to you. Tuwaine hadn’t really got anything to say. Harrison had almost cringed. There was no secret he was planning on inviting his girlfriend there and the two of you didn’t get along that well. It’s not like she was mean to you or anything else, you just didn’t click and there was nothing terribly wrong with that. Can’t be everybody’s friend, right?

Can’t be your crush’ girlfriend’s friend, at least.

Your infatuation with Harrison had started a few years ago. It fell on you suddenly, completely unexpected, and you had struggled to maintain the friendship while still trying your best to show your interest. It was physical touches here and there, a smirk, a compliment, an innuendo that you prayed he both didn’t get and completely understood at the same time.. But whether he had known or not, the situation had come to a sudden halt the day he had introduced you to his girlfriend. She was gorgeous, there was no denying of that. Really prettier than you, you found. And she was nice, if you were objective. At least, she was friendly to Tom, Tuwaine or the Holland brothers. You had tried to be her friend but the resentment was a bit too much for your little body and as much as you had made efforts towards her, a friendship had never occurred. Maybe it was asking a bit too much from you.

You didn’t even know precisely when it had started. You did remember though that it started with Harrison’s clear blue eyes. One day, they invited to a pool party and you realised that his eyes were clearer and bluer than you had thought them to be. You’d found yourself stuttering that day, every time he would look at you and you stared at him way more than you should have. He didn’t pick up on it. Tom did. You played the “it was really hot and I wasn’t feeling myself” card, which worked for a couple of months, until Tom saw right through you. In the meantime, you had fallen for your common best friend in more ways than you could count. His eyes, his smile, his dimples, his blonde curls, his kindness, his strong arms, his six pack, his laugh.. There were way too many things on your list. And it kept on growing. You loved the way he had to ask you how you were doing. You were fond of his little glances he’d throw at you, just to check where you were if you were walking behind him on a narrow sidewalk. You loved that he always gave you the slimmer controller for the PlayStation, because he knew you had small hands and you complained once about the bigger ones making you uncomfortable and making you lose. You loved that he would always pick the olives on your pizzas because you didn’t like that, or that he’d always give you the strawberry candies because he knew you’d love them when he wouldn’t.

Tom was sympathetic to your troubles. He wasn’t supporting it nor killing your buzz, but he knew about it and would either sometime frown when you’d get too obvious or console you when things got too tense for your liking. The number of tears he wiped off your face was outrageous, especially for someone you knew to be as dumb as Harrison. Don’t get it wrong, the boy was smart, but he couldn’t read a room for God’s sake and he often said ridiculous things without even realising it. Harrison was so goofy it could have been a crime if he wasn’t that darn cute. But he was. And you kinda hated him for it.

Tom was the one who agreed to take you on the trip. Harrison didn’t utter a word after he announced that his girlfriend was coming, as if that was the reason you needed to back down from your want to join. Tuwaine had frowned, letting off a fat “since when do you like Formula One?” to which you scoffed. If Tuwaine hadn’t realised, Tom and Harrison knew you had been a constant F1 watcher since the day you were born. Your dad didn’t sit you in your baby bouncer seat in front of the TV to watch Grand Prix for nothing. You had discovered F1 through glorious drivers such as Schumacher, Button or Alonso, who you were thrilled to see again this year. Passing the opportunity to attend a Monaco Grand Prix would have been a crime, especially against your father. You might not have been very vocal about it, but neither had Tuwaine and that seemed like a dumb throw, especially for him. Which you didn’t miss a beat to remind him. After that, Tuwaine had closed his mouth and hadn’t found anything to come back at you.

Tom knew it would break your heart to make you skip this trip. To plan it without you didn’t feel right to him and he was waiting for you to manifest yourself. Maybe you didn’t want to come. Maybe knowing Harrison’s girl would be there was enough to make you reconsider.

But you had shown yourself very interested and had thrown your elbows out to make yourself a spot in the plans. Tom had bought your tickets himself. You couldn’t have thanked him enough for that.

So here you were, in Monaco, being treated to glorious sun, glimmering waves and Red Bull merch that you had cringed at when you’d seen it spread on your hotel bed. You would have rather died than wear their cap. You were a Ferrari girl through and through, your dad would have had a heart attack if he’d seen you supporting any other team. So maybe when you had caught word about a Ferrari event supposed to happen in the paddock during the afternoon, you had started plotting your escape plans from the group, to enjoy this one on your own. Tom and the guys would have been scolded at by Red Bull but you had no obligation to promote nor support the team, since Tom was paying for you. You had packed a change of outfit in your tote bag and you had everything you needed to just spend the afternoon in town. Even your all access pass was tucked neatly and carefully in your wallet, waiting to be slipped around your neck. You only had to be mindful of the hour and that’s why, an hour and a half before you knew the event would take place, you announced that you were feeling a bit weird because of the sun and that you would try and seek some shadow by walking in the old parts of the city.

“Are you sure you’re gonna be okay?” Tom worried, shielding his eyes with his right hand, lifting his left to check the temperature of your forehead.

“I’m fine, Dad”, you rolled your eyes with humour. “I just need to cool down a little. I’ll text you if anything happens, I promise.”

Tuwaine was fast asleep on the softly rocking boat and Harrison was too busy cuddling with his girlfriend to actually notice. Your heart stung a little bit more seeing that. Last year, he would have cared. Last year, he would have asked what was going on. Last year, he would have tried to join you, just to make sure that you were okay.

Last year, you probably would have told him your plans and include him in them.

This year, you were too mad to even care telling anyone what you would be up to.

Tom helped you get off the boat and made you promise to be careful. He insisted on you taking a bottle of water but seeing how warm it now was, you promised you’d buy a fresher one in town. He dropped his own cap on your head, choosing to wear the extra that Red Bull had given him and you smiled knowing the soft pink hat looked ten times better on him than it would ever do on you.

“Whatever you have in mind, be careful, okay?” Tom insisted.

“I promise I won’t do anything you wouldn’t do.”

“That doesn’t reassure me, Y/N”, he groaned.

Tom was the only one who had somewhat made an effort to chat with you during this chill afternoon on the sea. It wasn’t really a surprise that he noticed the way you were slightly buzzing and how your eyes had a different shine in them. Hoping it’d pass for an insolation rather than pure excitement, you made your way across the harbour and found your way towards the track, as soon as you were out of sight. The walk across the town was nice, though a bit long, but you relished in the beauty of the streets and the French words thrown all around you. You spoke a few words, having learned it back in school, but not practicing meant you lost most of it and you could now only introduce yourself and answer very basic questions. As soon as you made a step inside the track’s limits, you looked for the nearest bathroom and sighed with relief when your pass allowed you to enter the VIP area where you knew you’d find big and clean bathrooms for you to change.

You got out wearing a nice summer dress, white with some red details, flowy and lightweight which was a bonus seeing how hot it was that day. Your makeup had been touched up in the mirror and your forehead wasn’t shining like a disco ball anymore, so you were good to go. You made sure your Monaco GP facemask was rightly on before slipping out of the bathroom, your bag on your shoulder and your sunglasses on your eyes. You knew it wouldn’t take long for you to join the Ferrari event and you crossed your fingers your AAA pass would suffice.

Judging by the face of the bouncer, it did, as he let you slip pass the red velvety cord and you were then thrown in a brand-new world. You hadn’t been able to walk through the paddock yet but you had watched the free practices from afar and it had been glorious. But now, finding yourself basking in fuel and burnt rubber smells, you felt like you were at the right place for the first time since you arrived in Monaco.

It took about five minutes for you to realise that the Ferrari event you had snuck into was a glorified meet and greet with the drivers. There were tons of investors and people so rich it’d take about 30 lives for you to match the amount of money they made in just two years. You tried to approach the drivers but quickly realised they were the main attraction and you decided that since you weren’t able to actually meet them, you’d enjoy the small exhibition they had thrown together. Grabbing a glass of champagne on your way there, you enjoyed the warmth of the alcohol mixed to the tinge of the bubbles. You took your time soaking it all up, reading the different panels explaining the history of the team and of the different drivers. You soaked in the sun and the stories told on the different boards, learning so much about the sport and the team that it felt almost illegal for you to be there. But the peak of your visit was the different cars exposed without any kind of glass cases surrounding them. They were just there for you to enjoy.

Not daring letting your fingertips touch the red bodies, you slowed your pace to admire the older cars, driven in the sixties and seventies, before moving to newer cars, driven by exceptional talents like Prost or Senna. The latest one was from the previous year, with the name of Charles Leclerc stuck in fine letters on the engine hood. You bent a little, admiring the name and the sharp edges when a cough made you jump and take a little step back.

You had been caught with your nose almost touching the metal.

“That one’s nice, isn’t it?” a voice behind you laughed.

“It’s gorgeous”, you smiled, before turning back.

Your heart fell inside your chest, ending at your feet without you being able to catch your breath. All you could see was red and clear green, from the polo in front of your face and from the eyes of the guy towering over you. You weren’t that small but you knew you weren’t tall either. He was a giant compared to you and there was no denying of it. Facing someone you mainly saw on a screen shouldn’t be a problem anymore, not with the friends you had, but you couldn’t help to be starstruck when you had someone you really admired in front of you.

“Nice to meet you”, he smiled, though you could only see it from his eyes. “I couldn’t help but notice that you were out there not mixing with the crowd, do we scare you or something?” he laughed.

“Not at all”, you blushed. “You guys were a little bit out of reach, I thought I’d enjoy the exhibition while you were busy and try again later.”

“The event is almost finished, the major part of the guests is gone”, he explained.

“I guess I lost track of time”, you gasped. “It was so interesting to learn more about the team and the history of it.”

“I know, right? I’m Charles, by the way.”

“I know”, you smiled. “Y/N”, you introduced yourself, stopping in the middle of reaching your hand out to shake his. “Hmm. Can’t do that anymore. Sorry.”

Charles laughed, shrugging. He too had been quick to reach his hand out, willing to shake yours, but this wasn’t very safe in those days. In the quick and few words he had already told you, you had deciphered a French accent that your heart weren’t sure how to handle. The small mistakes here and there just made the exchange ten times more wholesome.

“So you’re a Ferrari fan?”

“That I am”, you smiled, hoping your eyes would show it. “Always been. I have to thank my father for that.”

“He raised you well, then”, he joked. “Are you gonna be at the race this weekend?”

“Yes, I’m here with a couple of friends, we might be able to visit the paddock a bit.”

“Nice”, he commented. “I hope you’ll pass by the Ferrari garage!”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world!”

Charles rocked a little on his feet, unsure what to say next. You were the worst at making small talk, even though you had tons of questions to ask to a Formula One driver. But the fact that you couldn’t help turning back to the car made him chuckle and walk closer to you.

“This one’s my favourite”, he commented.

“Isn’t it the one you won Monza with?” you asked.

“It is”, he smiled, clearly reminiscing. “It’s also the one I won Spa with, a few days before.”

“It was such a difficult weekend”, you grimaced.

“It was”, he shrugged, obviously still affected by the loss he had to endure that weekend. “But I’m glad I could bring that for our close ones.”

“You did good on that race. I can’t imagine what you must have been feeling like..” you shivered, your hand now almost touching the red paint.

“It wasn’t easy. But I made it through and that’s all he would have wanted, so I’m happy for that. Some of our friends needed some good news on that weekend.”

“I guess.”

“Hey, you know that being with me gives you the right to cross that little cord, right?” he suddenly gleamed.

Your eyebrows rose higher on your forehead. You weren’t sure what was implied by his words but to see him look around him, checking how many people were still there made your heart race a little faster. Once he was sure there wasn’t many people left, he unclasped one side of a rope and presented his hand to you, inviting you to come on the other side. You followed him giddily, smiling so big your eyes looked like little suns with rays all around them.

“God, she’s a beauty”, you sighed.

“I like that you called her a “she”. She’s a “she” to me too”, he laughed.

“It would have sounded weird if I said “he”, I think. She just looks so fierce, it had to be a “she”, don’t you think?”

“I totally agree”, he nodded. “Do you want to do something a bit crazy?”

“If you’re suggesting taking it out of this little tent, I’ll have to deny. I’m not sure I can drive her”, you grinned.

“I didn’t talk about driving her. But you’re welcome to sit in, if you want”, he invited.

You gasped a little. Your dad would combust if you got a picture of yourself in a Ferrari.

“Are you sure?”

“I’ll let you in on a little secret”, he whispered. “She’s mine. I can do whatever I want with her.”

Your hands flew to your covered cheeks. You were trembling a bit but you would have killed to sit in that Ferrari. She looked so pretty and so proud, you had always been curious on what it felt like to sit in a Formula One car.. This was your chance and you knew it.

You nodded, wordlessly. You had no idea why Charles was offering such a big opportunity, but you would grasp it with both hands and tug it to yourself like a mad dog. Charles laughed when he saw you nod like a mad woman. He indicated that you had to get out of your heels so you wouldn’t scratch the paint and once you were barefooted, he helped you get in the car by showing where to put your weight and by guiding you with his hands on your hips. You didn’t even have time to realise what was going on before your ass touched the hard plastic of his cast seat. You slid in the back of it, laughing at the fact that your feet were far from touching the pedals and you giggled when your hands went to rest on the wheel.

“Liking it?”

“This is a dream”, you confirmed. “You really can’t see much when you’re down there!” you exclaimed.

“That’s because you’re a bit smaller than I am”, he laughed. “My vision usually goes up to the beginning of the halo”, he explained, by showing with his hands where his field of vision would end. “How’s the seat?”

“A bit hard”, you agreed. “Does your suit have padding or something?”

“It’s a bit padded, indeed”, he conceded. “Not much, but it helps.”

“The wheel has so many buttons, how do you remember every one of them?”

“I just learn them, to be honest. And sometimes I ask for help with the radio”, he smiled. “Want a picture in it?”

“Yes please, I can’t wait to show my dad!” you giggled.

Charles took the time to photograph you in his car, through different angles and different sides. He even got someone to take a few pictures of you both, you sitting in the car, him kneeling next to it. When after twenty minutes, you had asked everything you could have asked and you have seen and touched everything you could have seen and touched, Charles helped you out and waited for you to put your shoes back on, patiently.

“Thank you so much for the opportunity, Charles”, you smiled again. “Never would I have ever imagined something like that happen!”

“I’m glad I could help in realising a dream, then”, he grinned too. “Hey, have you been able to visit Monaco?”

“Not really, not yet”, you grimaced. “But so far, everything I’ve seen looks so beautiful, you really have a nice place.”

“I’m done for today, let me show you around.”

Maybe you could have said that Charles had been nice enough and you wouldn’t invade his free time anymore, but truth be told, there was something incredibly comfortable about being with him that just made you want to stay a little bit longer. Maybe it was how easy-going he had been with you, or how smiley he had been, which was a stark contrast compared to the rest of your friends these days, but you sure felt like siding with him was the right choice. Charles was nice, friendly and everything in between and for the first time since you left London, you didn’t feel like you were invading a space you weren’t supposed to occupy. Charles had welcomed you and it had felt so incredibly nice that you weren’t sure you were ready to go back to the hotel just yet.

Charles had insisted to give you a tour of Monaco in his own Ferrari. The matte black paint was absolutely spotless and the red and white lines in the front of the car made the whole thing look so glamourous you weren’t sure you had any right to sit in it. But Charles had opened the door to you and had pushed the windows open so you could enjoy the salty air of the streets of Monaco, while he was driving around the city, giving you comments about certain places and certain monuments. To discover the principality through the eyes and experiences of someone who had grown up there was the best way to go, you quickly realised, as his tour was full of little secrets that you wouldn’t have known about otherwise. The tour took about an hour and a half, but Charles made sure to speed at some points, where no one would be endangered, just so you could hear the rumbles of his engine and feel the air brushing against your hand’s skin through the open window. Your hair was flying everywhere and you couldn’t stop laughing, but it had been such an incredible experience so far and Charles had been so nice that in a way, you felt like you were currently asleep and dreaming.

“Hey, do you want to see my favourite place in the city?”

“Absolutely!” you exclaimed. “Everything here looks so beautiful, but I’m sure you have a secret space somewhere.”

“We’re gonna have to grab some things first”, he mysteriously smiled at you.

You stopped in a little grocery store that Charles knew and grabbed a couple bottles of sodas, as well as a rosé wine that the driver swore was to die for. He added to the basket you were carrying two commemorative plastic tumblers with straws, a couple of biscuits boxes and some strawberries you had been eyeing for most of your grocery shopping. He also took a baguette, some butter, two slices of ham and some water bottles, just in case. Your watch stated it was well past 7pm and while Charles was taking care of the paying part of your little shopping trip, you texted Tom quickly, telling him you were out in the city and that you would be back to the hotel in the evening. He tried calling you short after that, but you let his call go to your voicemail. He knew you were okay. There was no need to explain yourself. You were big enough to take care of yourself.

“Come on”, Charles smiled, your groceries now neatly packed in a shopping bag. “I have some things to show you still!”

You went back to his car, giddy and a bit weirded out that you now knew what it looked, smelled and felt like. The car might have been a monster of power and speed, but it now felt like a comfortable space, a home to several memories you had only just created with the driver. Charles smiled at you through his mask and drove to the end of the city. At some point, the old buildings and golden walls left their places to trees and a little wood, the golden and hot sun being traded for cool shadows. You left your hand escape through the window, enjoying the force of the wind and making waves like a child. Charles laughed at you, obviously pleased with your reactions and before you had time to really comprehend it, you were on a little cliff, above the whole city.

The view from up there was breath taking, the streets looking like a maze of light and gilded stones. The sun shone down on the highest buildings, making some glitter. The sea was stretching beyond your field of vision, a paradise of blues and glimmering waves. You could hear the waves from up there, but the city was quiet and the soft wind was all you could listen to. There was nothing but calm and nature there, which was the complete opposite of how lively and busy the city had been during these racing days.

“This is gorgeous”, you breathed out.

“I know right?” Charles smiled. “I thought you’d enjoy it.”

“You were right”, you let out calmly. “This is serene. I love it. Thanks for bringing me here.”

“I’m glad I can share this with you.”

You blushed a little. His green eyes were piercing and you knew you had to fight to get out of their captive glance. Once they had your attention, you were trapped. But the city down there.. The city might have been even prettier than the guy in front of you.

“Want some dinner? I make a mean ham sandwich”, he joked.

You sat down on a blanket he had fished from his trunk, which, surprisingly, was on the front of his car and not behind. He also had found a backpack, full of stuff you weren’t sure why he needed them for. But in the mess of that bag, he pulled out a small red Swiss knife that he used to cut the baguette, the ham and butter the bread. Once he was satisfied with his little sandwich, he gave you the first one and made himself another one, while you soaked in the glory of Monaco.

You ate in front of the view, quietly talking about your lives and getting to know each other. You learned that Charles would do anything for his little brother, as long as it assured him that he was happy. He talked about his father and how he missed him a lot. You explained what your studies were about and how your family supported you. You told him about London, about your favourite places there and how the next time he was there, he should pay them a visit. At some point, he took your phone number, promising he would call when he’ll come for Silverstone, so that you could repay him the favour of touring him through your hometown. He spoke about what it felt like to drive at 300 kilometres per hour and what crashing could do to your body. You talked about your favourite books and how your studies made you see the world in a completely different way.

He sometimes stumbled onto his words, not sure how to express himself in English. He made some mistakes here and there. Grammar obviously wasn’t his forte but you were impressed with how quick he was to speak and how he threw himself in his answers, not bothering to think about his syntax and how the sentence would turn out. At some points, he used Italian words, then French words. He apologised for getting them all scrambled in his mind, but he was so used to switch between one of the three that he sometimes couldn’t find the right translations anymore. You laughed at his little missteps, promising that you were mostly impressed. You could only speak English, so you couldn’t judge.

The sun was starting to set down when Charles dusted his pants and stood up. He told you to stay there, stating that he would be changing for something a bit more comfortable and you had to resist not to try and sneak a peek when you heard him slip out of his trousers.

When he reappeared next to you, he was wearing an oversized tee-shirt and Bermuda shorts that looked a lot like swimming trunks.

“I still have some time for a surprise”, he smiled.

His facemask had been taken off a while ago, after your promise of being safe and vaccinated. He couldn’t bring covid back to the garage and wouldn’t forgive himself for that. He had already got his vaccine a while back, having had covid a while ago during the winter break. Not his funniest experience, if you trusted him.

You took the hand he gave you, following him back to the car and letting him in charge. You recognised the journey while he was driving, knowing you would be back at the harbour and that’s where he parked his supercar. Once again, he extended his hand for you to take and you gladly obliged, letting him take care of the rosé wine and the two plastic tumblers, as well as the biscuits. You followed him to a small boat, not quite unlike the one you had been on earlier during the afternoon and you grinned when he got onboard, helping you get on by keeping your hips safely in his hands and guiding you while you jumped on. He got a key out of his Bermuda shorts and turned the engine on. He manoeuvred the boat out of the harbour and sailed for five minutes before turning the engine off and letting it rock softly against the waves.

The sun was now almost completely down, your watch indicating almost eleven o’clock. You were sitting on the white couches before he took your hand and guided you to the front, where you were able to lie down and he did the same next to you. The stars weren’t shining at their maximum yet but they still were visible and you sighed, feeling perfectly content for the first time in a while.

“Thank you for this afternoon”, you whispered, not wanting to break the quiet and calm of the evening.

“You’re very welcome”, he answered, just as quietly. “I’m glad I got to meet you.”

“The feeling is mutual”, you smiled, turning your head at him.

Your shoulders were almost touching and turning your head meant that your noses got so close to brushing that you immediately went red in the face. He smiled back at you and your heart skipped a beat. You couldn’t lie to yourself and say this man wasn’t attractive. With his clear green eyes and his peppered cheeks, everything in him screamed beauty. The sun had kissed his face like it wanted him to feel just warm and glowy enough, like it knew that Charles was something else and it clearly showed that there were favourites in this world. The small moles underneath his left eye and on the right side of his nose were begging to be kissed and the dimples on his cheeks felt like the perfect places to put your fingertips at rest. Taking his hand in yours had felt natural earlier but you couldn’t have denied the butterflies on the two occasions when he had framed your hips with his hands.

And now that your eyes were trapped in his once again, you weren’t sure what to do anymore.

“I’m glad I could show you Monaco”, he whispered. “I hope you liked it.”

“I loved it”, you swallowed, your eyes waltzing between his and his lips, not certain of which you were most fond.

“Great. I did a nice job, then”, Charles cleared his throat, though you could tell your eyes weren’t his priority anymore.

He was the one breaking eye contact, turning back to continue on his stargazing activity. You sighed softly, perfectly content with your current location and company. Everything felt new and exciting with Charles, your stomach had been buzzing with nerves all day, but in the good way. Your fingertips felt antsy, only relieved when he had held your hand and you were tingling from head to toes whenever he looked at you. You weren’t sure that you were supposed to feel that way, but you were certainly glad you were.

“Do you have a bathing suit?” he suddenly asked.

“Yeah, why?”

“Want to swim a little?”

The sparkling waves should have been enough to say yes, but the mischievous little smile he was sporting ended up making you nod. Charles helped you up, guiding you to the back of the boat before going back on his steps, letting you change in peace. You joined him afterward, clad in your bikini and he presented his hand, ready to bring you with him. Charles walked you to the edge of the boat, counting to three before jumping in the water with you. It wasn’t as cold as you imagined it would be, but it definitely wasn’t as hot as it had been during the afternoon. You gasped a little, shocked at the temperature, while he laughed.

“This is nice”, you giggled.

“The water is really nice”, he confirmed. “And the sky is clear, which means we get this”, he pointed at the stars, now clear and bright for you to watch.

As you tipped backward to look at the stars better, your forehead got caught in a wave and you almost choked on sea water. He laughed a little bit, swimming closer to you and sliding a hand behind your back and knees, making sure you were stable.

“You gave me stars”, you smiled.

“I’d gladly give more”, he whispered.

You slipped your arm across his shoulders, enjoying the feeling of his warm skin beneath yours, of your legs tangling with his, even though you both had to keep moving if you didn’t want to sink like anchors. Everything felt right, right there, right then. You felt safe with a perfect stranger and you felt happier than you had been in a very long time. Everything felt reachable, including the small little curls that were forming on the nape of Charles’ neck, which you didn’t hesitate to explore with your fingertips. Charles skin rose in small bumps peppering his shoulders and you dropped your lips there, not quite kissing, but tasting. His skin was salty with the water which didn’t seem to bother you. It was his turn to sigh, pushing an arm around your waist, getting you closer to him while his head fell backwards, into the water. You took advantage of the angle to raise your lips to his neck and throat and when he finally got enough, you didn’t even get enough time to react.

Kissing Charles felt like embracing fire. Everything felt scalding hot and even though the water was cool around you, heat rose from your stomach to your chest, close to where his second arm was now resting, on the small dip in your back following your spine. Your toes curled without even wanting to and if it wasn’t for Charles keeping you afloat, you’d be underwater for sure. Most of your senses left, at the exception of touch and taste, but you couldn’t hear or see anything, when all your brain was praising his name like gospel. By the time you became aware of what was going on, it was almost done. You prayed no one was on the harbour and would recognise him. Not that you were ashamed of yourself, of him, of this kiss, but you hoped it wouldn’t put him in a delicate spot.

And then you thought “to hell with it” and dived a second time, like you had been starving for the faint taste of strawberries left on his lips.

It was well past midnight when you made your way back to Charles’ car, his hand secured around yours, bringing a tiny bit of warmth back to you. You were draped in a blanket that he had found aboard his boat and wrapped you in it. He was taking care of your heeled sandals, but had also found an old pair of slippers of his in one of the trunks of the boat, which you had gladly accepted.

Charles made the roof of his Ferrari disappear before he turned the engine on, not revving it up so he wouldn’t make too much noise for the people who might be asleep on the yachts. You tipped your head back in the seat, appreciating the view, but letting both your intertwined hands rest of your left thigh. He didn’t turn the radio on. He didn’t say a word. But he drove comfortably back to your hotel and handed the key to a valet, promising he would be back in a few, before making his way to your door and helping you out of the car.

Once you had a taste, you couldn’t get enough of it. As soon as the elevator’s doors were closed, you rose to your tiptoes and stole another kiss, letting him press your back against one of the walls, while his hands found their way to your hips, before sliding to your thighs and sneaking underneath the hem of your dress. His fingertips were full of static electricity, sending tiny shocks to your skin, making you sigh between his lips. There was something so damn attractive about the small curls on the nape of his neck that you couldn’t help to go back to, burying your fingertips in his scalp, waiting for the tingles in your spine to engulf you whole. You didn’t hear the small bell of the elevator letting you know you had reached the right floor but Charles did, making sure your thighs were covered by your dress when the doors opened. He took your hands and walked you to your door, his thumb tracing circles on the back of yours.

“Will you be at the track tomorrow?” he whispered.

“Should I go?”

“Please come”, he hummed, dropping a butterfly kiss on your temple.

“I’ll be there, then”, you promised. “I’m gonna have to leave you there”, you grimaced. “My friends are probably waiting for me.”

“Don’t want to let them know who you spent your evening with?” his eyebrows raise, a bit amused.

“I want tonight to belong to us only”, you breathed out, your lips seeking his once last time. “This was an amazing day, thank you Charles.”

“My pleasure”, he smiled, kissing you again. “See you tomorrow.”

Charles let go of you and for the first time since you left the boat this afternoon, you felt cold. You watched him walk back to the elevator, but not before he quickly made a 180, demanding one last kiss before he left. You giggled at him, letting him go before you’d spend the night in the hall with him.

Passing the door to your suite felt like closing a book and it kind of broke your heart a little. But for the first time in forever, you realised.. you haven’t thought about Harrison. Not once. Not ever since you met Charles and that spoke volumes to you. Your world no longer had that soft blue tint, instead, it was turning green. You no longer wanted to imagine how it’d feel to be the one Harrison would look at like he did his girlfriend. However, you really wanted to feel the way you felt when Charles was looking at you, back on the boat or in the sea. And the way you would often gaze at Harrison’s fingers, wondering what it’d be like to feel them between yours didn’t compare to the softness of Charles’ hands.

For the first time in forever, Harrison didn’t compare.

And it felt bloody great.

“Where were you?” a voice cut the silence of the suite, making you roll your eyes to the ceiling.

“Out in Monaco”, you sighed, letting your totebag slide to the floor by the couch.

“All alone?”

“No.”

“Who were you with?”

“With all due respect, Harrison, you’re not my father and you lost the right to baby me a long time ago.”

“What even is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that it’s almost two in the morning and she just came back”, Tom intervened. “Instead of grilling her, maybe we should just let her go to bed and discuss that in the morning.”

“Tom, you know that I love you, right? But there’s nothing to discuss. I got a tour of Monaco and spend a great night in a glamourous city. You both don’t need to know more. I didn’t do anything illegal, nor that you wouldn’t do, so I will take Tom’s words to heart and go to bed. Good night.”

Harrison sighed, obviously not done with the conversation. And for what it was worth, you couldn’t care less about his opinion. However, you took a glance at Tom, who looked a bit worried and you decided that you’d fill him in on the following morning.

Slipping out of your dress, you realised it smelled like sea salt and burnt rubber; an interesting combo that you could get hooked on, if you spent more time in Monaco. If you spent more time with Charles.

All that you knew was that you would have given a lot to see the stars instead of the ceiling of your hotel room and you would have traded way too much to hear Charles’ breathing next to you instead of the lulling roar of the air conditioning.

Tomorrow would be different. You’d go to the track and find him back to the Ferrari garages. Who’d know what could happen then?

You just hoped there would be more starry skies and more sighs between open lips.

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

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justreadingfics · 4 years

Text

It’s a Deal (Chapter 7)

Chapter Summary: How you and Bucky feel about the presence of your ex-boyfriend.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Words: 4.3k

Warnings:+18 only, mention to smut, overdrinking, embarrassing behavior due alcohol consumption, Natasha knows stuff, ex-boyfriend, minor jealousy, minor angst, floof, Bucky has a somewhat creep confession, but give him a break, he’s never been in love.

A/N: Another smutless one, I hope you don’t mind. Thank you to my sweet Les for having my back. The link to my masterlist, where you can find the other chapters, is on my description. Feedback is highly appreciated.

Tag list for this story is closed.

Previously:

Your shoulder brushes against him as you walk past Bucky and he turns his body around, following you with his gaze. He takes a long sip of his drink and places a hand inside his pocket, watching as you approach your ex-boyfriend.

He tries hard to bury deep down inside him the tug on his chest.

“Oh, fuck…”

Natasha’s curse makes him turn to her and he realizes she’s been watching him, with a dumbfounded expression he’s not used to see on her face.

“What?”

She scoffs and shakes her head, seeming in an estate of disbelief, “This whole time I’d been worried with the wrong person.”

No point. Bucky sees absolutely no point in trying to make it like there isn’t turmoil twisting inside of him. Not for Natasha, anyway, it would be to no avail. Also, he’s pretty sure there’s a kicked puppy look on his face to make it harder for him to put on any kind of façade.

“Fuck,” he sighs and run his hand harshly over his face, “What the hell is this, Natasha?” He whines, failing at trying to not sound as helpless as he does.

“You tell me, buddy.” She points at him with her glass of vodka, tilting her head with interest.

“Shit,” he exhales, looking down, before his face snaps up at her, “I’m … just weird, I’m not myself these days.” Bucky bites his lower lip as if trying to somehow refrain from spilling the words, but he just can’t, he’s dying to let it all out. He steps closer to her and lowers his voice as much as he can with the loud music beating around them, “I’ve spent almost every day of the last month with her. I have absolutely no desire to see or think of another woman and I have to restrain myself constantly, cause if I had it my way I would call her every five minutes to check in on her, and… and when I’m thinking about her - which is all the time, I fucking swear - I wonder if she’s thinking of me, and now? I mean, right now? I feel like snatching the blade right now on my ankle and shooting it right on that fella’s throat.” Finally taking a breath after his rambling, he points in your direction, before turning to see you right when you’re letting out a small laugh at something the punk has said.

“Wow…” Natasha lets out a whistle.

“A few days ago,” he turns back to his friend, “I snuck into her closet to find out the name of her perfume. And you know what I did next? I bought a large bottle for myself, like a fucking creep,” sheer frustration plasters on his tone.

“Oh my…,” Natasha snorts at the same time a mix of incredulity and amusement shines on her eyes, “That’s definitely creepy and it’s even worse than I imagined. The almighty Bucky Barnes, the I’m a whore and proud,” she thickens her voice playfully, moving her arms in a mimicking way, “The I don’t do romance and attachments king is a tiny lost puppy with big blue heart eyes, aww,” she inclines her head as if she’s thinking of him as exactly how she’s just described him.

Bucky tries but he can’t actually find the amusement in all of that. The fact one single woman is making him feel that way is entirely new, unpredictable and… scary as hell. He has no clue where to go from there.

Natasha seems to swiftly catch on his little inner self torment and, after letting out a deep sigh, she puts on a small smile and shakes her head, “Don’t worry Bucky, it’s probably a crush. A big one. But only a crush,” she places her hand on his arm, giving it a squeeze, “Y/n is one of my best friends and I know how delightful it is to be beside her. Maybe you’re just infatuated…”

“Maybe…” he exhales and shrugs, “I wouldn’t know… all I know is I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. Not that I remember…. but I’m pretty sure I would.” He looks at you again while you’re still talking to the Eddie guy.

“They have history,” Natasha says in a kind voice, following your gaze.

“I know.”

“He was her first and only boyfriend.”

“I know.”

“She thought she was going to marry him.”

“Damn Nat…” he breathes out his frustration, dropping his head for a moment, before raising his downcast gaze at her again, “Yeah, I know that, too.”

“But you’re Bucky fucking Barnes,” she snaps in a more cheerful voice shaking his arm with a enthusiastic force, “Don’t forget that, buddy,” she shoots him a warning glare, “Also, I’ve never seen a brighter smile on that woman than when she’s talking about you,” she beams.

Bucky’s heart jumps and a quick breathy smile surges on his lips before he takes in a shuddering breath, “I’m not sure what I should do, though.”

“Well, figure it out,” she lets go of his arm and taps on it, “My advice for the night if you should accept it is let it flow,” she shrugs. “Go on with your thing and see what happens. Just try not to hurt you or her on your way, though,” Nat warns.

“I’m not even sure I-Wait,” he frowns after his gaze is drawn to the spot where you are again, “Did that fucker just leave her alone?”

He instantly struts towards you, ignoring Nat’s snicker.

~~~

“Hey,” you smile, gulping down the nervousness down your throat as you approach your ex-boyfriend. The one you haven’t seen ever since he broke up with you months ago.

“Hey,” he offers you a tight but kind smile back.

You halt on your way, the awkwardness building up a barrier on your way as you’re not sure what to do next. Should you give him your hand to shake? Hug him? Do nothing at all? Not once before you had thought that moment would play out between you and Eddie.

But he seems a bit more resolved than you and shrugs, leaning forward and wrapping an arm around your shoulders, “Congratulations again,” he says, still holding you, “You’re the best and most hard working person I know, you deserve it.”

The small smile in your lips grows wider and you accept the compliment, relieved that the awkwardness seems to be tamed. While you’re so close to him after all that time, you notice he’s wearing the same perfume he’s been wearing for years, the one which would make you sneeze all the time, but you never really said anything.

“Thank you,” you lean back, sniffing discreetly to suppress the sneeze threatening to come out, “I’m happy you could make it,” you add. The fact he’s arrived all by himself grasps your interest, considering how everyone around you would tell you he was probably seeing someone else… however, if he did have someone, he wouldn’t bring them to your party, would he?

“Of course. I wouldn’t miss it,” he says with a gentle tone, but the formality is still there, you notice.

You two engage in some small conversation and you can’t help but to take him in and realize that, just like the perfume, Eddie looks exactly the same with everything else. The same hairstyle, same grey t-shirt you gifted him on your last Christmas together, the same constant half smile while he talks… he still speaks quietly, letting out just a few small words, which has always forced you to be the one to push on the conversations…

It’s… familiar… even comfortable, you dare say. But if you’re going to be honest with your own feelings, ever since he walked away, you thought you would be yearning to feel that familiarity again, that it would lead you to a sense of… home.

Why it isn’t quite like that, though?

“You look different,” he says as the subjects of small talk seem to come to an ending point.

You put your previous thoughts aside for later consideration.

“Oh…Different good or bad?” you ask, tilting your head with a small pull in the corner of your lips.

“I don’t know... just…different, I guess,” he frowns and quickly puts on that half smile of his.

“Oh, well… it’s been a while…“

“Yeah… I guess you’re right,” he says, regarding you with a wondering look in his eyes that makes you shift on your knees, “Listen,” he clears his throat, “I was wondering if we could meet to talk one of these days.”

“Oh,” you draw in a breath. Talking to him, having a real conversation, is something you’ve been wanting to do for a long time. It still feels like you don’t fully understand why you’re broken-up. Regardless the time it’s passed, you still feel attached to him somehow, like, no matter how exciting and new, you’re now living someone else’s life and not the one you had planned for you years ago.

“I mean,” he adds before you can give him a proper answer, “We still need to figure out what to do about the condo.”

The words are like cold water thrown at your face. There you are, thinking he wanted to talk about your relationship, but what’s really on his mind is the condo you’ve bought together. Swiftly, you work on putting a small smile on your face, “Yeah… sure, you’re right,” you nod.

“Hey! Eddie!”

Both of you look towards the female voice and your eyes fall upon a beautiful young woman you recognize as one of the members of SHIELD’s tech team. You’ve worked with her on a joined project of the two organizations before. Chloe… you believe her name is Chloe.

She’s waving at Eddie excitedly, calling him over the little group she’s with. She doesn’t seem to notice you’re standing next to him until her gaze meets yours. The wide grin on her face drops into a quick cringe before she nods in a respectful manner and shifts her look away, whispering something at one of the guys in the group.

When you set your attention back on Eddie, you tighten your lips just as you notice how the bone on his throat bobs right before his flustered eyes meet yours again.

“I-I, ahm, gotta go,” he runs his hand on the nape of his neck, “Can I call you later?”

“Yeah, sure.” Your voice comes out calm and controlled.

“It was good to see you,” he says, before placing his hand on your shoulder, “Congratulations again.”

After you give him a small nod as a thank you, keeping the tight smile on your face matching his, he walks away towards the group and the woman. The one your friends kept warning you about, apparently, given how uncomfortable he seemed to be in front of you after you saw her. As soon as he gets there, you see the two of them talking in hushed words. He keeps a safe distance from her, but his hand on her arm is where your gaze sticks on.

You don’t have the slightest idea of what’s happening with your feelings right now. Minutes ago you were realizing the familiarity of Eddie wasn’t what you expected it to be anymore, but now, seeing him so close to someone else… a beautiful woman, to be more specific, with her long black straightened hair and fancy blue dress holding each one of her beautiful curves…It just crushes you. A lump grows in your throat and while your gaze flicks around, you feel small… lost… picturing ways you could flee away from your own party at the same time ten years of your life flash in your mind.

The cold, yet gentle touch of metal in your elbow is what takes you out of your own head, “Hey, everything alright?” says the silky and soothing voice.

Your gaze meets Bucky’s while he stares at you with concerned eyes. Those gorgeous blue eyes of his…There’s already a bit less turbulence inside your chest and mind. You think nothing of it, though.

“Yeah, yeah…” you smile, “He, ahm… Some friends called him. He had to go.”

Bucky just lets out a hum – which sounds more like a groan – staring over your shoulder to where the little group stands.

“He said he wants to talk…“ you start, and don’t see when Bucky’s breath hatches catches on his throat, his eyes back on you, “About the condo,” you press your lips, “He said he’ll call me.”

While your gaze gets lost ahead, you have no idea that the sadness in them pinches deep inside Bucky’s chest. If you could read Bucky’s mind at that moment, you would find out that the fact your reencounter with your ex-boyfriend hadn’t ended up in some sort of hope for reconciliation hasn’t left him sad at all, but the lost look in your eyes… makes him wanna hold you in his arms and never let go. Not before punching a douche in the face, of course.

“Oh, come on, sweetheart,” he wraps his arm around your shoulder, side hugging and pulling you closer to him, “You’re the fucking boss now and, look around, ” he gestures with his glass of whiskey to the crowded and jazzing place, ”You have a damn Stark party just for you. We’re all here to celebrate the badass motherfucker you are. You’re not just going to let anything ruin your night, will you?” The corner of his eyes crinkle as he grins at you.

You let out a small laugh, the heaviness inside you slowly slipping out of your body as you allow yourself to synchronize with Bucky’s vibe. You can always trust the upbeat way he presents the world to you to lift whatever mood of yours up. You look down at your empty glass and shrugs, “I might need a refill, though…or two,” you shoot him a warning look.

Bucky’s smile stretches even wider and he lets go of your shoulders to offer his arm, nodding towards the bar, “Shall we?”

You gladly accept his suggestion by wrapping your hand around his elbow and walking with him, not even noticing that Eddie’s gaze follows you with piqued interest.

~~~

Quite a few more drinks later and after listening to Tony’s very nice and very Tony speech on his toast to honor you, you’re already fully invested in your party again. Bucky stays by your side most of the time, but you also come across with a lot of your friends from work and a few others, who are all more than happy to put you high on a pedestal for your promotion and party with you. It stings a bit when Camilla, your friend from work, tells you she heard Eddie and Chole are really together, but two or three more drinks after, you end up hitting the dance floor with a few friends by your side, not even seeing when Eddie leaves the party early, right before Chloe.

You’re happy to see that Amanda, one of Bucky’s friends you met that night in the club, has made it to the party, but you’re already too tipsy and it slips from your attention when she comments on how Bucky has been quite distant from her and the other girls for almost a month now.

If you’re going to be honest, you end up not truly noticing a lot of stuff since you’ve been drinking a great deal more than you’re used to, probably due the drill of having a kickass party thrown for you mixed with the unexpected sight of Eddie with a potential new girl - after months without seeing him. As the alcohol does its thing in your senses, you don’t notice the way Bucky looks at you, the way he holds you a little bit stronger when you’re dancing together, how he glares at the guys who tries to approach you or the fact he only leaves your side when he knows you’re comfortable and safe.

All you see and feel now is the music and the lights as you sway your hips to the beats. The party is almost coming to an end, but there’s still a small crowd of people enjoying their last moments there. The alcohol, the music and your friends, more precisely Camilla, Olivia, Amanda and Nat – the last two in the middle of a flirting contest you fail to notice, as well – are the ones around you. The buzz clouds your mind in a delicious way until your back bumps into a hard wall. Your weakened knees give in but before you hit the floor the wall wraps around you and holds you still.

Oh, you know that hard wall of muscles… You know it pretty well.

“Hey, there.” A foolish smile plasters on your lips at the same time the back of your head leans against the wall so you can see his face. His gorgeous and ungodly sexy face, “Your face is sexy,” you decide it is a very good idea to tell him that now.

“That right?” Bucky smirks, holding your gaze.

“Oh, yeah,” you clumsily turn around to face him, prompting him to grab you tighter since you stumble a bit on your toes. You curl the hand holding your glass around his neck, “And you’re big, too,” you don’t even notice but you’re a slurring mess as you speak and look to see your running hand down his broad chest, roughly probing his muscles, “Very, very big,” you exaggerate a sultry tone, the alcohol erasing any kind of subtleness or refinement in you or the notion that there are people around you, while your hand explores further down his body to say it’s not just about his muscles you’re talking about.

“Sweetheart.” Not making a big fuss about it, he gently grabs your wrist over his lower stomach to place it around his neck along with the other one, ”I’m very flattered to hear that, you’re one very nice piece of ass yourself, too,” he engages with you, keeping the playful tone.

You let out a girlish giggle, turning your face towards your friends, the trio now whispering and laughing among themselves as they watch the both of you, “He said I have a nice ass,” you shout, not realizing how loud you actually are as you lift and shake your hips, making your friends laugh harder and causing you to trip on your toes once again. But of course Bucky catches you before you fall.

“How many drinks, so far, huh?” Bucky chuckles, keeping the hold of his arms and eyes on you.

“Three or four,” you answer with nonchalance, bringing the glass to your lips as you hold yourself on his neck, only to pout when you notice it’s empty.

Your friends scoff at your lie behind you, “You can add at least ten more to that count, sweetheart,” Natasha shouts from behind you, punctuating the word sweetheart with a teasing pull on her mouth.

You make a dismissive face only Bucky can see, “Nonsense, check out what I can do,“ You step back from Bucky with the intention to put on a yoga pose you’re sure will convince your friends of how ok and steady you are and as soon as you lift your leg, you trip again and this time Bucky is not fast enough to catch you before your ass hit the floor.

The four of them rush to help you out as tears fall down from your eyes at how much you’re laughing, holding your glass up. It’s Bucky who ends up picking you up, though.

He and your friends shower you with questions to check if you’re ok but it all falls like a blur sound to your years.

“Ok, I guess it was a bit more than three or five,” ignoring the curious eyes around your group, you laugh making an ok sign with your hands before your stomach churns and you grimace, placing your hand over it, “Oh…” your face drops.

“Alright, come one, let’s go,” Bucky supports you with his hands and urges you to walk with him.

“Where are you taking me?” You frown, sounding almost offended as he takes your glass from you and hands it to Natasha, gently pulling you along.

“My place… let’s freshen up, come on,” Bucky patiently says, nodding at the girls to say goodbye, who just nod back, knowing you would be in good hands.

“Ooooo, bye girls, we’re going to his place to freshen up,” you wink exaggeratedly and make air quotations with your fingers, addressing your friends as you clumsily walk away with Bucky.

~~~

“Bridal style,” you loudly announce stretching your hands and legs to the air as soon as he steps inside his living room with you in his arms.

Bucky can’t help but laugh as a snorting giggle follows your words. If he had his way he would’ve carried you from the party, but he didn’t want to attract even more attention to your state. So, on the second trip on your own feet inside the elevator he picked you up. It would be easier that way.

Bucky carefully puts you standing on the floor and, as soon as he’s convinced you can stand on your feet without stumbling or falling, he turns to shut the door, only to have you jumping on him as soon as he faces you.

“Hey, hey,” he manages to say softly, placing his hands on your hips as you shower his mouth and face with sloppy kisses which taste strongly like fancy champagne.

“What? Let’s freshen up,” you answer in a log slur, dragging your lips on anything of him you can reach.

Bucky laughs, pushing you away with a gentle yet steady touch, looking deep into your eyes, “That’s not what I meant… not when you had so much to drink, sweetheart.” He flicks his thumb on your chin.

It takes a moment or two, but realization – and disappointment- finally dawns on your face, “Oh… you meant freshen up for real…” You shut your eyes and tap your hand on your forehead.

Bucky thinks you’re too damn cute for your own good.

You focus on him again, “Are you sure, though?” You insist, shoving a finger in your mouth and tilting your hips, putting on before him the unsexist pose Bucky has ever seen.

Yet, it’s the most adorable thing and his annoying heart swells inside his chest for you as you keep your attempts of seducing him, “Yeah, I’m sure,” he nods unrelentingly, holding back a laugh and waiting to see the follow up of your shenanigans.

“But I’m horny and I wanted to suck your big dick,” you pout, crossing your arms and thumping your foot against the floor.

Bucky takes in a deep breath. He is only human and can’t help that his poor cock twitches at your bratty whine. But your glossy half open eyes and dragged voice reminds him he’s the only one sober enough to make decisions in the room and therefore, his buddy down there needs to chill, “I’ll be more than happy to allow you to do so,” he’s amused when your face light up, “But not tonight, sweetheart,” he puts his hands on your shoulders and turns you towards the kitchen, not without spotting the dirty look you give him.

“You’re no fun,” you complain, barely able to put one foot in front of the other before you stop and swirl around, trusting on his strong hold to not let you fall wearing a devilish little smirk on your face.

Bucky cocks an eyebrow, waiting for whatever mischievous pearl will come out of your lips now.

“What if…” you start before a hiccup interrupts you, “I show you my boobies?” You offer, leaning over and pressing your breasts together through your dress, “You looove my boobies,” you wiggle your eyebrows suggestively even if your eyelids can’t even remain wide open.

“I do love your boobies,” Bucky can’t deny, not hiding his amusement.

Apparently, that’s all you need to hear before you throw yourself on him again. Bucky swiftly catches you with a huff, but you can’t do much more than circle your arms around his neck and rest your head on him.

“Love your muscles,” you mumble quietly against him, “There are so many of them.”

“Come on, sweetheart,” Bucky tries, “As much as I love your boobies and you love my muscles, now it’s not the time. Now it’s time to get you some water, maybe a sandwich, huh? Then I can prepare you a shower and you can rest a bit and… Y/N?” Bucky calls when you’re too quiet- not even making a sex innuendo when he mentions a shower.

He listens a not so soft snore as a response and looks down to see you completely dozed, with your mouth agape against his chest. He sighs… still the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, goddammit.

“Guess we can skip right to the resting, then,” he whispers through a fond smile.

Taking you in his arms he walks towards his bedroom and places you on his bed. You only stir a bit when he gently removes your shimmery and apparently uncomfortable dress and unties your heels. He dresses you in a t-shirt of his so you can rest comfortably. He manages to make you drink a little bit of water, to which you whine graciously enough, and, after covering you with a thin blanket – because he knows you’re never really that cold at night, no matter the temperature in the room – he moves to get up and maybe take a shower for himself.

“Bucky,” you mumble and, without opening your eyes, you move yourself to nuzzle against his metal hand sprawled on the mattress, “You’re not going to leave me, are you?”

Bucky is absolutely sure you have no idea of what that question really means to him, how it falls upon the rising tangle of feelings inside him… which is all for you. Wonderful and beautiful and special you, who came unannounced and stirred up something in him he never thought possible. Something he just doesn’t know what to do with.

Moving meticulously slowly not to pull his hand and wake you up again now that you’re deep back into slumber, he lays down beside you. For your question… he doesn’t say anything. Simply because he doesn’t know the right answer yet.

~~~

To be continued.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #bucky barnes series #bucky barnes floof #it's a deal #it's a deal chapter 7

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nomsugayoongi · 3 years

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Off My Face. - Part 2

Pairing: Jungkook X Female OC (nameless)

Tags: FLOOOOOOOOFFFFF. Slight angst but mainly just sappy, ridiculous fluff. ("She" is SO into him) And smooching. Think of this as the warm up before the straight up filth starts. :p

She walked outside in silence with Namjoon close beside her. He'd realised quickly that this wasn't a light-hearted situation to poke fun at. She looked troubled and it worried him. He stayed quiet, following her to the very bottom of the garden. She wanted to get as far away from the house as possible due to her irrational but overwhelming fear of someone overhearing. She settled on a picnic bench among some trees at the very end of the garden. Namjoon sat on the table itself with his feet on the bench. "What's going on?" He questioned. She sighed with exasperation. "God, I don't even know. It's so stupid." She groaned. She felt like a complete tool. "Ok, I'm just going to ask you something. Did you sleep with Jungkook?" Namjoon asked.

She frowned, shaking her head emphatically even though the very suggestion made her stomach clench. "But something happened between you right? Last night maybe." He wasn't exactly sure what it was but he was definitely sensing a shift in their relationship. She continued to shake her head. "No, nothing happened. Literally nothing. But..." She broke off and shrugged. "But...you want it to. You like him." He finished. She nodded. "I don't get it Namjoon. He's Jungkook. I've known him ages. I've never even slightly looked at him like that but...last night. God, when he walked in it was like the light dimmed around everything else. He changed right? While I was gone. Something happened to him. Something must have. He's...so different." She muttered. Namjoon smiled slightly and shook his head. "Not really. He's made a couple of changes to his appearance I guess but...that's just Jungkook becoming more fully who he is." He mused. She glanced at him with a slight smile. Namjoon could always be counted upon to speak pure sense. "But then why the sudden attraction? If he is the same guy I left 3 months ago, how come I can't look at him now without my insides going nuts? They didn't before I left. My insides did nothing. Now it's like my heart is trying to physically beat itself out of me so it can get closer to him. It's dumb. I literally can't handle how...sexy he is. He's like this whole new person to me. He's the damn maknae. He's the baby. Unthreatening, sweet little Jungkook. Now he walks into a room and it's like a pheromone bomb explodes in my face and there is not a fucking thing i can do to keep my hormones in check. He walks in, I check out. Full mental shutdown for anything that isn't related to him. I'm like...possessed of something. Can't see, can't hear, can't think anything else. Just him. And my head is taking me on this fully realised, sense-surround journey of me and him. Thoughts of him...in ways I didn't even know I COULD think about him." She shook her head, the floodgates opening and everything she was thinking and feeling just spilling out. "This cant be happening Joon. It just can't. I can't feel this way about him." Namjoon smiled, "Why not? He's not seeing anyone. You know that. Maybe you should talk to him. Tell him what's going on" he suggested. She shook her head rapidly. "Ohhhh no. Nope. No way. Can't. What the hell would I say? Oh Jungkook, I Lost my damn mind in England and now you're crazy hot. Wanna make out?" Namjoon laughed heartily. "Maybe don't word it that way. But you know you can talk to him. He's Jungkook. He'd get it. And maybe it would help you to feel not so crazy. You can't keep this to yourself." He said. She shrugged. "Have to. I can't tell him Namjoon. I don't even understand it. And hey, it could be just like....a fleeting thing. Quick infatuation cause i've missed you guys." She mused, not actually believing it at all. And apparently Namjoon didn't either. "Well... Are you having these feelings about any of the rest of us?" He questioned. "No." She replied. "Exactly. I don't think it's just cause you've been away. I think you've realised that home wasn't what you thought it was. Going back to England showed you how much has changed and now you're back here where you belong, your eyes are opened to other things that might not be what you thought they were. Like Jungkook." He offered. She hummed thoughtfully. It did sound plausable. But the part of her that didn't want to engage in this messiness threw up defences. "But why him? He's Jungkook. I'd get it if it was Jin or you or..Shugs even. But he's the baby. He's the least threatening of all of you. Except maybe Jimin and that's only because he's actually made of rainbows." She joked. Namjoon smiled and shook his head. "But he isn't. I think this is why you feel like he's changed. Jungkook isn't a kid anymore. We've all joked about the Maknae. But he stopped being the baby years ago. He's grown. He's an adult. The changes... The tattoos and piercings and hair. He doesn't want people to see him as a kid anymore. You thought he

was safe because he fit into a nice little box of being the baby. Now he's challenging that. And it's not just how he looks. He's more...in control of himself. He's putting out hard that he's grown. You're just...picking it up!" Namjoon explained. She huffed, dropping her head between her hands. "Well he needs to quit it. Things were simpler when he wasn't threatening. His new sexiness is offensive to me. I feel attacked." Namjoon laughed and she raised her head, smiling slightly. She knew she sounded childish. "I really think you need to talk to him." Namjoon suggested. She sighed, shaking her head again. "I can't. It's too messy. And he'd feel weird about it and it'd make it awkward and I don't want that. It'll pass. This time next week we'll be laughing about this conversation." He could hear the hopeful tone in her voice but wasn't convinced. convinced In all honesty, Namjoon thought she'd be great for Jungkook. He needed someone to balance him out. He was too hard on himself. Overly critical about everything he did, from starving himself before video shoots to completely breaking down if he made the smallest mistake. He needed someone to bolster him. To show him how he actually was. Not what his critical mind told him he was. It was a running joke that Jungkook was good at everything but Namjoon didn't like where it seemed to be going. He worried for his youngest brother. He felt that her affections could be exactly the thing Jungkook needed to calm him down. To show him that he didn't need to try so hard. He was enough. He needed someone to adore him for exactly who he was. And she was perfect. And Jungkook was perfect for her too. He could ground her. Show her that even though this wasn't where she was born, it was where she belonged. Show her that she wasn't an outsider. He could anchor her. Give her the confidence she was so desperately lacking. They would be so perfect together. But he could tell by her expression that this wasn't a conversation that she was willing to hear right now so he kept it to himself. "So what now?" He questioned. She shrugged, looking defeated. "Dunno. Just wait for it to pass I guess. Namjoon, please don't say anything to the others." She asked, looking suddenly panicked. He smiled, jumping off the picnic table and pulling her into a hug. "Of course not. But if you need to talk about it..." She nodded against his shoulder, suddenly overwhelming thankful to have such amazing people in her life. "Thank you Namjoon. I don't know what I'd do without you." She whispered. He laughed, tightening his hold on her. "You never have to find out" he said comfortingly. ----------------------------------------------------------- Weeks passed. Her feelings didn't. If anything, they were getting stronger by the day. Being around him was painful. Being away from him was worse. She was convinced that she acted differently when he was around. She felt more distracted but Namjoon assured her it wasn't noticable to anyone else. Her cover was still in tact even though she was sure that every interaction with Jungkook turned her into a spazz. They'd planned a movie night. She was going to cook for the boys, something she loved to do then they were all going to crash out in the lounge and binge watch films. After a day of shopping for food and prepping, she was ready for a relaxing night. It was extraordinary how much food those 7 guys could put away. Even after overestimating and cooking what she thought was way too much, they still managed to finish everything. She picked at her food. Cooking always made her lose her appetite and honestly she was just tired. She wanted to collapse on the sofa and zone out for a while with the comforting noise of her favourite people around her. As the meal finished, she began to gather up the plates and clear away. It could have waited until the following day but she thought she might as well do it then while she still had a scrap of energy left. With a tower of plates and bowls balancing precariously on her arm, she teetered into the kitchen and started loading the

dishwasher. She'd have to go back out for glasses and serving dishes. She smiled to herself, listening to the rabble coming from the guys as they moved into the lounge and fought over who got what seat. She heard the kitchen door open behind her and figured it'd be Namjoon or Yoongi. Generally If she was doing something, they helped. She turned and saw Jungkook wandering into the kitchen with a stack of serving dishes. He was balancing them on one arm while eating the remains of the top dish. "How are you still eating?" She chuckled, shaking her head. He smiled sheepishly with a shrug. "I can't waste good food." He replied with his mouth still full. She rolled her eyes, having a moment to enjoy the warm feeling that filled her tummy when he looked happy. "You didn't eat much. Are you ok?" He asked, the concern he expressed marred slightly by the giant amount of noodles he was trying to stuff in his mouth. "Yeah I'm good. I'm just not hungry. I'm always starving when I start cooking and by the time I've made it, I don't want it." She explained with a smile. He dumped the dishes on the counter next to her pile and turned to her, leaning against the worktop. "Are you sure you're ok? I feel like I haven't seen you in ages" he said softly. Her heart fluttered as she turned to face him. There was a moment of silence where she contemplated her answer. A tiny part of her was telling her to tell him how she felt about him. The vast majority of her was screaming to keep quiet. She nodded, wrapping her arms around herself. "Yeah...I'm ok. Tired I guess. And a little cold. Maybe I'm getting sick." She shrugged. He nodded slowly, the expression on his face was difficult to read but it made her stomach churn nervously. She turned to the dishwasher, distracting herself from his gaze by stacking the plates. "Leave that. We'll clean later." He said. She felt his hand on her back and almost jumped out of her skin. She straightened up and steadied herself. He'd taken off his white hoodie and was holding it out to her. "You said you're cold." He offered. A wave of affection surged through her as she looked at him. His soft brown eyes studying her carefully. She tilted her head to the side, taking in how beautiful he was. Not just in looks but In general. "Jagi" she whispered, barely audibly. The endearment left her lips without her even noticing. His eyes widened slightly for a second then a shy smile tugged at his lips. He pushed his hoodie into her hands. She took it, pulling it over her head, the smell of him enveloping her. As she straightened the hood and pulled out the yellow drawstrings, he stepped closer, untucking her hair from underneath the hoodie. He straightened her hair then paused, catching a loose strand from her forehead and pushing it away from her eyes, tucking it carefully behind her ear. "Sit with me?" He asked. She looked up at him, her heart hammering as she nodded. "Mmm hmm" She followed Jungkook into the lounge feeling slightly dazed. Maybe it was the lack of food. Maybe it was the brief interaction she'd just had with him. Maybe it was a combination of both but she felt...different. Her tummy was squirming but in a good way. She felt...warm. Her interactions with him were usually tinged with nervousness or fear. Would she slip up? Would she say or do something that gave her away? But at that moment she just felt peaceful. She just wanted to be with him. Wherever it was or whatever they were doing, it didn't matter. The guys were already sprawled over the sofas and Yoongi was arguing with Jin over what film to watch first. Jungkook picked the corner of the largest sofa, nudging Namjoon further over so there was space for her. She didn't miss the knowing smile Namjoon flashed her as he relented what was arguably the comfiest spot on the sofa. Jungkook sat, patting the space beside him which she took happily. He threw an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his side. The arguement about which film to watch ended, the lights were turned off and silence fell as the movie began to play. She wasn't paying any

attention to the film whatsoever even though she was technically looking at it. She was too lost in her thoughts to actually notice what was happening. She'd watched films and cuddled with the guys numerous times. Jungkook included. But she felt so different. She could see him out of the corner of her eye. His face illuminated by the screen. She could seem him gasp at a cool part or laugh at a funny part. She felt every movement when he stretched or wriggled. His arm moved from round her shoulders and rested between them as he slumped further down on the sofa. She watched his hand gradually move closer to her leg. She moved her hand closer to his, using her little finger to trace the letters tattooed on his knuckles. She saw his face break into a smile and he straightened out his fingers, making it easier. She traced each letter slowly, then the crosses between, then the BTS logo. He chuckled softly and she glanced at him. "Tickles" he mouthed. She grinned, stopping her tracing. "Sorry" she mouthed back. He shook his head. "Nice" he muttered. He turned his hand over so it was palm up and she smiled, turning her attention back to his hand to trace the lines across his palm. He sighed quietly, resting his head against the back of the sofa and closing his eyes. He liked the attention. He needed it. He'd been feeling pretty down on himself over the past couple of weeks. He'd noticed that she'd been avoiding him and it bothered him. He couldn't figure out what he'd done wrong and though he felt the constant need to apologise to her for it, he didn't know what he was apologising for so instead he just kept quiet. His hyungs did their best to boost his mood but their affection and attention didn't affect him the same way hers did. They were his family. They loved him so it made it easier to take their encouragements with a grain of salt. But she had no reason to pretend. If she was giving him her attention, it was because she wanted to. And he craved her attention more than he wanted to admit. He knew that to her he was just the maknae but sometimes it was nice to just feel like himself. He focused on the feeling of her fingers gliding softly along his hand, moving up his wrist. It tickled pleasantly. He wanted more. He wanted everyone to go away so that he could have her full attention for a while. The delicate stroking of his arm stopped and he felt movement beside him. He opened his eyes as she was getting up. "Leaving?" He asked, unable to hide his slight frown. She smiled and shook her head. "Bathroom" she whispered. " Back in a minute" She needed a breather. A second away to collect herself. She was falling into this a little too much. Being in such close proximity to Jungkook. Neither one of them actually paying attention to the movie. He looked so peaceful and content as she'd been playing with his hand. She noticed every time he'd smiled or sighed happily, every twitch of his fingers when she ran over an extra ticklish bit. She wondered if he'd noticed that she'd traced the heart on his hand more than any of his other tattoos. She studied herself in the bathroom mirror. His hoodie was too big on her and she grinned as she wrapped the yellow drawstrings around her fingers. She took a deep breath, tried to calm the butterflies in her stomach and headed back. The way she felt in that moment, 2 minutes was too long to be away from him. He greeted her with a smile as she crept back into the room and took her place beside him once again. "Okay? He whispered. She smiled and nodded. She snuggled back into the big cushions and turned her attention to the film. She wanted to keep touching him but didn't know if the moment was ruined. He closed his eyes again, also wondering if her attentions were finished. He felt her shuffle beside him but didn't open his eyes. He was kind of disappointed really. Or at least, he had been for the first few minutes. Then he felt her fingers in his hair, pushing through until she touched the skin on the back of his neck. The pleasent tickle returned with the smooth, feather like glide of her

fingers. He shivered slightly, leaning into her touch. His eyes fluttered and he let his head lol forward. She traced swirly patterns from the nape of his neck, down, pushing her fingers under the collar of his t shirt to stroke the top of his back. She'd tickle up and down his neck then under his collar and along to his shoulder then back. He was almost purring. Her light touch felt so good. He was angry that his hyungs were in the room. Had they been alone he would have just laid on his front, whipped off his shirt and left her have it it. He wanted more. He wanted to feel the soft glide of her fingers all over his skin. As she pushed her fingers up through his hair another blissful shiver traveled down his spine. All thought fell from his head as a he lost himself in her delicate stokes. Slightly more pressure against the back of his head then soft again as she wrapped his hair round her fingers. He wasn't sure how long it'd been going on for but it didn't feel like long enough when she stopped. His eyes felt heavy but he forced them open, looking at her quizzically. "What?" He asked, noticing the slight bashful expression on her face. "I need to stop" she whispered. He frowned, "Why?" She sighed, exasperated. "I need a drink" she mumbled, getting up and heading for the kitchen. He sat for a minute, puzzled, then headed after her. He found her in the kitchen leaning against the opened fridge door. "What's the matter?" He asked, closing the kitchen door behind him to drown out the movie sound blaring from the next room. She huffed and shrugged keep her back to him. "I just...need a drink. And to stop petting you like a dog" she muttered. He laughed, placing a hand on her shoulder. "I don't mind" he replied. "Well I mind" she snapped back. He frowned, dropping his hand. "Oh....ok. Sorry." He mumbled. She turned to look at him, a bashful kind of hurt look on his face like she was angry at him. Her heart ached. "No...Jungkook, I mind because...." She took a deep breath, hating the look on his face, "...because I don't want to stop. I want to stoke you and pet you and make you feel good. But I can't because the more you enjoy it, the more I want to kiss you." She blurted. He looked at her wide eyed. Her face burned, her heart thudding wildly. Well damn. She'd said it now. "Jungkook...I'm sorry. I have been having such a shitty time being around you. Since I got back from England, you're all I can think about. I am so fucking into you it's not even funny. And I want to be close to you and do things that make you feel good cause there is NOTHING nicer than seeing you happy but it's just all tangled up in this shit i'm feeling and I don't know if I can keep them separate and I'm so scared of making you feel awkward or uncomfortable so....it's better if I just...go!" She sighed. Jungkook didn't seem phased. He nodded as though he understood then took a step towards her. "Kiss me?" he said softly. She nodded, rubbing her face. "Yes, I wanna kiss you" she replied. He took another step, a smile tugging at his lips. "No I'm not asking if you want to. I'm..." He sighed, "...I'm telling you to do it." Now it was her turn to look surprised. She frowned, looking at the smirk playing round his mouth. "Huh?" She barked. He took another step, closing the gap between them, he reached for her hands, pulling her to him. "Come here....and kiss me." His voice was lower and breathy. His brown eyes flashed as he leaned in, shaking his hair off his face. "Show me what you're feeling" he whispered. She almost wilted. His eyes closed heavily, his nose touched hers, their was a sharp inhale of breath from her, her grip on his hands tightening then her lips brushed his so lightly. Her heart was beating so fast she could hear the blood pounding in her ears. Her legs didn't feel like they could take her weight. His mouth opened, she could taste his breath. She wasn't sure if he was teasing her or they were teasing each other, either way, there was a delicious moment where the promise of the kiss hung in the air between them, then it ended, her lips

caught his, her hands sliding up his arms and winding round his shoulders. It didn't feel like a tentative first kiss. It was supercharged. All force and heavy breathing. It was like he could feel how much she wanted him and he fed off it. His hands tangled in her hair, holding her head steady as he took possession of her mouth, his tongue explored, he nibbled her bottom lip, she moaned against his lips, fingers curling against his shoulders. He could feel the slight nip of her nails through his shirt and it only served to make him kiss harder. He was rapidly losing control of himself. He felt greedy. He could feel the waves of desire radiating off her. The air was thick with lust. She wanted him. And he wanted her to want him. But not here. Not like this. He hated it but he eased up, letting go of the handfuls of her hair, trying to steer this back to somewhere manageable. He kissed her softer, running his fingers down her cheek, feeling her grip on his shoulders relax. He diverted the attention from her mouth, kissing sweetly along her collarbone then up her neck. A slight, mischevious nibble of her earlobe made her breath catch but he grinned, running his fingers through her hair. "Naekkeo!" he whispered.

#jungkook #jungkook x oc #jungkook x reader #bts #ot7 #jungkook smut #jungkook bts #jungkook fanfic

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beccalendsahand · 2 years

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Takarazuka End of Year Tag 2021 (Part 1)

In which I finally answer my own tag!

You can find the questions here I decided to answer the questions in 2 posts, first 7 questions today, and the rest tomorrow coz I've realised I've run out of time, so without further ado...

1. Sumire no Hana: Did you find a new favourite this year? (Either someone who has entered the company this year or someone who has been in the company a while but you have only just become a fan, or both!)

I have a couple for this! All musumeyaku! I started the year by noticing Irodori Michiru as Mozart in Fortississimo, I thought she was such a fun character and it's so unusual to see musume in male parts so that made me even more interested in learning about her. Then later in the year, I saw City Hunter, which although wasn't really my thing, I did come away from it thinking "michiru was so cool in that", haha! So now I'm definitely going to keep watching her shows, I really want to see her shinjin koen "hoshiai" and "wansu"!

The other two I have become a fan of is the ladies of the moment for the Flower Troupe, and that's Hoshizora Misaki and Mihane Ai! They just absolutely blew me away as Isabelle and Ann Neville in Prince of Roses. I found them so striking because of how young they looked and yet how fierce their acting was. When Urara as Margaret Beaufort says to Mihane "You're a strong woman aren't you?" I really felt like it was not just Beaufort's thoughts of Ann but the thoughts of us watching Mihane on stage. They both seem to be getting great roles so I'm excited to see where their career takes them!

2. Never Say Goodbye: Which taidansha was the hardest for you to say goodbye to this year?

Do I even need to answer this one? It is of course Hana Yuuki. Hana Yuuki means so much to me, she's a an actress that kind of sneaked up on me. I became a takarazuka fan when she had just become Top Musume but I didn't become a fan of her right away, perhaps it was because I was still infatuated with all the otokoyaku at that point, or maybe it was because there was only "fairy tale" and "koisuru" to watch of her top run at that time. But then gradually I started to like her more and more, and once reihana top combi happened and I saw the Haikara-san live stream suddenly she became my entire fan identity. I think she is brilliant. I love how she strives to keep improving and you can see how she has grown with every performance. I also love her acting, she performs with this honesty that I've never seen from any other performer, she completely transforms into whoever she's playing, and even if she has to act in a cartoony style (for a manga adaptation for instance) she still manages to get to the heart of her character and make them feel real. I was so heartbroken when she annouced her taidan, "haikara" hadn't even finished yet! I had prepared myself for a good couple more years with her and then BAM! She was gone. But I love how right till the end she never got typecast, for such a short top musume run she got to play so many different kinds of women, maybe even more so than top musume who have had longer careers. She had an incredible final show as Pompeia in Augustus and a beautiful send-off in her sayonara show, which contained so many moments that will stay with me forever. Thank you Hana for brightening my days x

3. Material Girl: Favourite piece of merch (most treasured Takarazuka thing you have bought yourself this year, OR if you didn’t buy anything this year, a piece of merch that is on your wish list)

Speaking of Hana Yuuki, my most treasured piece of merch from this year has to be my bromides of the sayonara show in Tokyo. I was convinced because of proxy service that by the time white rabbit would be able to buy them for me they'd be sold out, but they weren't! My momentos of reihana.

Also wanna give a shout out to le cinq in general, I ended 2020 with 3, now i have 9! They are perfect for my interests, the photos make great art references, and then the scripts help me study Japanese! XD I love my le cinq collection, they give me the serotonin I need to get through these dark days. Earlier in the year when I was in my uni house, I felt pretty rotten, and I had this ugly wall in my room that had gross marks on it and cracks in the plaster that I would stare at from my bed, which made me feel worse. But then I covered it with my le cinq posters and it honestly gave me a boost every time I looked at them.

4. Mon Paris: Did you discover a new fav show that was not from this year? (This can be any fav show that you saw for the first time this year that was released before 2021)

This is super hard actually coz I realised that whilst in my first year of zuka I watched as many things as I could, this year I've become set in my ways. I just watch reihana on repeat and then maaaaybe I'll watch the latest official live stream (I think the only time I'm guaranteed to watch an official live stream is if it's hanagumi, I'm sorry). So I've thought long and hard about this trying to remember what I watched. And I think I'm going to go with a trick answer and say, the Casanova shinko! So I've seen Casanova before, but I've never seen the shinko. So many people talk about how good the Casanova shinko is so I was so I've been meaning to watch it for the longest time, and then a month or so ago a friend streamed it for me and it was such a fun experience! I loved seeing Hana again and so many other siennes who since then have become really big in the troupe. It was a delight!

5. Wings of the Heart: Favourite fandom memory (this could be a fun stream experience, going to the theatre with friends, all collectively freaking out about something together, anything really!)

Without a doubt it has to be watching the Nice Work official live stream together with friends. My favourite thing about being in the zuka fandom is the community we have. Watching streams together is always fun, but there was something extra special this time. We had been absolutely convinced we would never see this show because it was a broadway adaptation, but then last minute it was announced we would get a live stream and we all FLIPPED the hell out. We couldn't believe our luck. I don't think I've ever been so excited for a show before, it just sounded so perfect for reihana and hanagumi, I was so excited. And then when we did watch it we all changed our names and icons to reihana and nice work related so nobody knew who was who anymore and we just spent the stream filled with joy! It was a very special time.

6. Where is God (kami wa dokoni): What Hankyu announcement shocked you the most this year?

I'm gonna go with something totally random for this and say getting rid of the Tokyo Theatre's QR? What's that all about? Idk it's just was the most random thing and makes no sense, a theatre without a gift shop? I get that it's a little small but they litterally have a massive one across the road that people could go instead. Lol it does not affect me at all but I have fond memories of that place T-T

7. The Final Dance (Saigo no Dansu): What was your favourite duedan of the year?

I'm going to do a trick answer for this and say the most beacutiful dance I've ever seen, reihana barefoot dance in cool beast. UGH its so delicate and tender and bewitching and beautiful and poetic. I love the beauty and the beast type story that goes with it too and ahhh its just so perfect, no other duet dance comes close.

#endofyearzukatag #endofyearzukatag2021 #blahblog #end of year tag #takarazuka #becca blogs

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petri808 · 3 years

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1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 fin

Inukag Royalty Au

A month had gone by since the Naraku incident and for the two royal families, life had seemingly returned to normal. Princess Rin found in Prince Souta a new friend closer to her age, Miroku had started following Sango around— much to her chagrin, and the Queens were already teasing their kids over future grandchildren. The formal wedding celebration had begun with guests from all their ally territories in attendance. It was truly a large and joyous occasion. The Higurashi’s ballroom was filled with the finest food and drink, beautiful decor, and music to entertain the masses. Both kingdoms were ready to put all the misunderstandings aside, ready for a bright new future. But not everyone was in a celebratory mood.

The party was already in mid-swing with Prince Inuyasha and Princess Kagome mingling with the guests and giving off on an air of contentment. Plastered smiled and staged conversations. But once the revelers seemed fully preoccupied by drink and merriment, Inuyasha pulled Kagome to the side.

“I could use some fresh air,” he suggested quietly.

“Mmhmm,” she agreed with a nod.

Inuyasha took Kagome by entwined fingers and led her out to a side garden where they would have some privacy. No one noticed them take their leave, save for their ever-dutiful attendants who simply nodded their approval. Don’t get him wrong, Inuyasha wasn’t having second doubts about marrying Kagome. He loved her, there was no question about it. But that didn’t mean there weren’t a few things still left unanswered. He could sense in her that she felt the same way, so with the start of their new lives truly about to begin, it was time to get things straightened out.

“Is this, okay?” Inuyasha questioned once they reached a small gazebo. “The night air isn’t too cold, is it?”

“No, it’s alright.” Kagome sat down with Inuyasha following her lead. “I suppose this was inevitable.”

The last couple of months had been such a whirlwind. From her identity being found out, to Naraku, the threat on the kingdom, the wedding— she and Inuyasha didn’t have any time to talk. Or rather, Kagome had also been nervous to do so.

“I think so too.” Inuyasha took her hands. “Please do not think I brought you out here because I am unhappy with you or that this marriage was simply to save you from Naraku.” He brought her hands to his chest and held them tightly. “I married you because I love you. But I just wanted to make certain there isn’t anything else you’d kept from me. All those months you were with us under false pretenses, I wish to know what was fact, and what was fiction?”

Kagome dropped her gaze to the ground. “I’m sure it’s obvious that all the stories about my family were fiction since they are very much alive. But there were truths woven in. In her youth, my mother’s parents really did not provide her a tutor because they didn’t believe a noble woman needed anything more than how to satisfy and cater to a husband. So, she took it upon herself to listen in during her brother’s lessons, then steal away to their library to educate herself further. With me, she made sure I got as much education as they could provide. Sango taught me a lot about how to protect myself and to use a bow. My parents weren’t thrilled about it but didn’t stop us either.” She looked back up at Inuyasha. “And Tanaka was the name of an old attendant of mine. As for what else is true, falling in love. I tried so hard to resist you because I didn’t want either of us to get hurt.” Kagome looked down again. “I should have thought things out more clearly before I ran… it caused so many problems for everyone. Yet even so, I feel guilty because it had led me to you and the happiest time of my life. You, Rin, your family, I love you all so much for what you’ve done for me. I wouldn’t know where to begin in repaying such a debt.”

“Is there anything else I should know?”

“Who you saw in me, my personality, and behaviors, that was all still me. I didn’t change that part— don’t think I could have lied to that degree and made it believable.”

Inuyasha tipped Kagome’s chin back up. “I believe you; I can sense that much in you.” He smiled before leaning in with a soft kiss. “Now, is there anything you’d like to ask me?”

“No,” she shook her head and smiled. “I feel you’ve always shown me the real you.”

He kissed her again, deeper, letting it linger as he kept their foreheads touching. “There is no debt to be repaid my love. For you’ve already given me what I’ve been searching for my whole life.”

“What… do you mean?”

“Acceptance— true acceptance.”

“I-I don’t understand…”

Inuyasha pulled back but kept his palm cradling Kagome’s cheek. “All my life I’ve felt split between two worlds because I’m a hanyo. Yokai and human alike would sometimes look at me differently. Of course, they wouldn’t dare say anything to my face, but I could feel the awkwardness. That’s why I was very angry for a long time. Rin forced me to lighten up, but I still felt inside like I’d never be truly accepted and yet you loved me despite my nature. Now, I don’t care if anyone else judges me differently, as long as I have you by my side.”

Kagome’s eyes crinkled at the corners as a few happy tears pooled in them. “Oh, Inu, I’m just as lucky to have you too.” She chuckled and smiled. “My mother worried no one would want a woman who’s feisty.”

He laughed, “that’s exactly what drew me to you.”

She leaned her head onto his shoulder with a contented sigh. “Fate was never something I really believed in before, but it’s hard not to think there is truth on such tales.”

“It is quite ironic how things worked out in the end, but I’m really happy they did.”

“Me too.”

This was a future neither had allowed themselves to believe possible. For Kagome, the fairytales of finding a Prince Charming were once a dream now come true, and Inuyasha the weight of lonely years melted away. They sat there for a few minutes in a comfortable silence, simply enjoying the night air and absorbing this whole new life about to begin. What will it be like? Will they always be happy now? Have all their worries ended? As a second son, they won’t have the stress of ruling to deal with, so that just left creating a normal family life— well, as normal of a life a royal could design. Children… how many should they have? These are the kinds of questions the couple will need to ponder at some point.

Speaking of children, Kagome flushed at the idea. While they have had a few intimate moments, mostly kissing and a little bit of touching, but the couple had not gone all the way yet and frankly Kagome was a little nervous about it.

“Inu?” Her voice was soft, hesitant in breaking the silence. She wasn’t sure how she’ll take his answer, but Kagome wanted to know.

“Yeah?”

“Have you, been with anyone before… like, i-in bed?”

“No. Why do you ask?”

“I’ve heard stories about how princes can be loose like that…”

“Well, not me. I won’t lie and say I’d never been tempted, but most of the women I’ve been around never interested me much. Nobles are usually so… boring or just looking to increase their status and I wasn’t about that.”

“Are you nervous about it?”

“A little.”

“Me too.”

Inuyasha turned to face Kagome. “I won’t force you, if you’re not ready.” He lifted her chin. “I’ll wait as long as you need.”

Kagome blushed harder. “It’s not… that… I want to… with you.”

“Oh,” his brow raised with a chuckle. “Have you been fantasizing about me?”

“Maybe… Have you?”

“Oh— yeah.” He grinned. “How could I not? Every time I’d see your beautiful face, and this,” his hands moved down to her waist, “body, just dreaming of learning every inch of it. Plus, have you any idea how much your scent drives me wild?” She shook her head no. Inuyasha leaned down, his lips so close to her neck, his breath sent chills down her body. “Well, it does, and now you know,” he answered in a husky tone.

“Oh… Inu…” Kagome breathed out when his lips grazed her skin. Her hands clutched to his vest, pulling, begging he stay right where he was as her head tilted to give a great span of access.

Inuyasha chuckled, whispering a tease. “Princess we’re too out in the open to be getting so hot and heavy. Or is this a naughtier side you’ve been hiding from me?”

“S-Sorry,” Kagome blushed. “I don’t know what came over me.”

“No need to apologize love.” He kissed her forehead. “I’m excited too.”

Now that the air had been cleared, the couple decided to go back to the party before someone came looking for them. It was winding down already, and guests were starting to leave. They assisted their parents in giving their thanks and wishing safe journeys to those traveling a distance. Then once they were assured, they were no longer required to stay, Inuyasha and Kagome retreated to their private room.

“Need any pointers?” Miroku whispered to the prince as he escorted them through the castle.

“Pfft, not from you,” Inuyasha sneered back.

Miroku chuckled as they reached the room. “Have fun you two,” he winked before walking away.

“Damn pervert.”

“Leave him be,” Kagome giggled as she pulled Inuyasha into the room and locked the door. “He means well. Will you help me with this dress?”

“I know…” Inuyasha sighed. “And of course. What do you need me to do?”

Kagome’s face heated up, but she stayed with her convictions. I’m a firm, yet tentative tone. “Take it off me.”

Inuyasha’s eyes widened as a grin formed. “With pleasure…”

Their time at the Higurashi castle had come to an end, and the Inu royals said their goodbyes. Kagome’s parents were sad to see her go but were happy with the outcome knowing their son-in-law will take good care of their daughter. Promises were made to visit as often as possible, and they looked forward to the grandchildren yet to come. Sango would stay on and become a member of the Inu kingdom for Kagome, much to the delight of Miroku. The Princess had teased her friend about the budding infatuation, but Sango still refused to admit there was something brewing. That left more addition to the entourage, Sango’s younger brother since he became her ward after the death of their parents. Princess Rin was delighted by the decision because now she’ll have a friend to play with at the palace. Even her father Sesshomaru had taken a surprising interest in the boy’s prospects as a future soldier.

The newlyweds were given their own comfortable carriage to travel in. Which was great because it gave them privacy during the four-day trip. Inuyasha pulled Kagome close and kissed her forehead. “Ready to start our new future Princess?”

“Mmm,” she smiled. “I can’t wait.”

~~~~~

Sorry this final chapter is a bit lackluster, but the last couple of weeks I kinda lost motivation to write. I hope it was still at least okay, and thank you to everyone who's been following along :)

#inukag #inuyasha #inukag fan fic #kagome higurashi #inukag au #royalty au #inukag fan fiction #ch 9 ending #the irony of fate

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