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gotham-daydreams · 7 months

Note

How would it have gone differently if Reader didn't try to be an "overachiever" and instead just stayed quiet and didn't interact with anyone besides Alfred until they left? Their room they left being mostly blank, with only the music journals? Giving up on trying to get their attention.

I think what's so funny about this ask, to me, is that I already have a concept like this written down (along with 3 others since the current reader I'm writing for the "Not [ ]" series is one of them but with a few missing details), so this'll be fun!

I guess it generally goes how you'd expect? Which is different for the most part, but the reader's perspective on what's happening is also different.

Granted, I would like to point out that, at least for this particular concept and the idea I have for it of how this would go, does have more stuff going on pre-Batfam that do affect how they perceive what's happening, and that's what makes things interesting in my opinion. Because someone can be naturally shy or just overall more reserved either out of nature or because they feel a certain way, but still feel bad about being neglected and, despite their lack of effort, feel that pain just as much as someone who's tried. Which is valid! Besides, someone's definition of 'trying' can vary as well.

Everyone should have a chance to have a family, and form some kind of connection with people. Just because you aren't going above and beyond for one person, doesn't mean you're undeserving of certain things. Especially not a chance to have a family, or feel like you have one. That's what I think anyway.

Nevertheless, back to the reader!

From the original concept, I will be tweaking a few things to fit the ask, but the same general outcome remains! Though again, the reader's perspective on things is a tad different. But how about this- I'll show two versions of the reader.

One that's quiet and more reserved because they gave up much earlier, or just generally hopeless really early on because maybe they felt as if anything they'd do just wouldn't be enough, who'll be accurately named Quiet!Reader. With the other being more closely related to the concept I wrote for such an idea, that we'll refer to as Waiting!Reader.

Quiet!Reader would change up things quite a bit! I won't lie!

They might already have bad self-esteem that's quick to develop at the start of things, which is something to note as that doesn't get better with time. They grow more cold and distant from the family at a quicker pace both from personal and external reasons.

Put simply, they don't feel good enough, and even if they did- anything they could do to get the Batfam's attention would never be enough in their eyes. To which, they see very early on when they try to engage and do some things with the family, only to be turned down. What doesn't help is when Quiet!Reader sees Damian get adopted and almost immediately showered with love, (compared to them) and that really cements some ideas that were already developing in their head about the family.

When Damian comes into the picture, they feel replaced. Seeing him as someone to fill in the 'youngest Wayne' role instead of them, so that Bruce and the others actually have someone to acknowledge for such a title. Just someone else to further take away the little they had.

So, they further step out of the way, glaring at the Batfam with tired eyes before that eventually stops too. Envy clawing at their heart, hatred being sent through waves of pain all throughout their body. Hurt unmatched. Yet they still remain invisible. Quiet as ever. Unnoticed. Everything they ever felt dies down, and forms a cold numbness that they begin to associate with the family.

Maybe through that, they feel closer to the family in some twisted way. Now just as cold as them. Just as talkative, and just as engaging. Almost mirroring them, but they're honest about how they feel. Honest about what they think, and therefore better. At least when compared to the Batfam- and to them, even if it wasn't a high bar to reach anyway, at least it counts for something.

It was never Damian's fault, or really about Damian at all. It could've been anyone else and Quiet!Reader would've still reacted the same way, they know that. Though just seeing the Batfam show love and care to him and not them just makes them feel... worse.

Clearly they're capable of love, and can notice new additions to the family (to which they may have mostly believed that the Batfam's neglect was just something the family did for whatever reason, and thought that them being the youngest had something to do with it for a while) and that breaks the reader. It doesn't hurt, not as much as it would've, maybe, but whatever hurt is there dies down quickly as Quiet!Reader, well, quietly accepts their fate.

The Batfam clearly wants nothing to do with them, so why should they try to do all of these things for them? It's simple, they shouldn't. So they don't. Quiet!Reader gives up, and continues to live their life without them.

The Manor just becomes a place they sleep in, and nothing else. It isn't anything close to a home, and not even Alfred can help with that.

It's because of that little fact, however, that Quiet!Reader leaves much sooner than the reader in the "Not [ ]" series. Maybe once they get a friend they can trust, they essentially end up living with said friend, hence why their room remains so empty. The notebooks they even keep in the room they have in the Manor is from when they were way younger, instead of just being from a few months ago or so. We're talking years since Quiet!Reader has touched those things now.

Maybe they do 'officially' leave a month or so before they usually would as an overachiever in the "Not [ ]" series, having only bothered to return so often before because of Alfred. Though even then, they'd forget to return most nights- only being reminded to even try and go back once Alfred would personally call them, and ask them where they were.

However now, after a while of just the time between them basically living with their friend and sleeping at the manor, they stop returning altogether. Though this time around they instead personally go to Alfred to say they're goodbyes. Not explaining much, but just saying that while they might still try to come and visit him sometimes, they don't live in the Manor anymore. Alfred already knows this, and the embrace they share fully hammers in that fact.

Yet when Quiet!Reader turns away, and leaves the Manor for good- even through the front door at that. Alfred can't help but just... miss them already.

You see, while Quiet!Reader is indeed quieter and more reserved, especially towards the Batfam, with Alfred really being the only exception, they still made music.

Maybe they didn't have as many concerts or physical, grand, live performances compared to the reader in the "Not [ ]" series, they not only started earlier, but may have actually started out on a social platform such a youtube. They really started out small, but were able to find and start their passion much earlier!

Most of what they played was when they were in the Manor, but slowly they started to get involved with things music related outside of the Manor and in Gotham- and from there were able to build themselves up even more. Hell, I'd even say that Quiet!Reader is a little more well-known and popular than the reader in the "Not [ ]" series because of the amount of extra time they dedicated to their passion.

So basically, Alfred this time around has more recordings and such of Quiet!Reader actually doing something they love than with the one in the series. However! Funnily enough, they're gone for a shorter amount of time despite having left earlier than normal.

Alfred is just, extra fed up with this nonsense, and so pulls his tricks more early on, but also make them hit harder.

He doesn't clean Quiet!Reader's room to show how long they've been gone, adding onto the emptiness and almost abandoned feeling the room itself gives off because of how bare and empty it is. They're music haunts the halls, subtle, sure, but still noticeable- especially to those who are hyper aware all the time. Pictures of Quiet!Reader and Alfred begin to be hung up, and if he can manage- some with Quiet!Reader and their friends during important parts of their life.

No one is safe from the guilt and anguish Alfred seeks to cause to not only have the Batfam look for you, but most importantly, to finally notice you.

Let's just say, things work out a little too well.

---

As for Waiting!Reader? Oh man, I've been wanting to rant about them for a while!

Unlike the reader in the "Not [ ]" series and Quiet!Reader, Waiting!Reader had some semblance of a life before getting adopted into the Batfam. Though the idea and character themself isn't musically inclined/involved in music, or even all that interested in music for that matter- for the sake of this ask, lets say they are!

I won't dabble too much into the life Waiting!Reader had before the Batfam, as if I do end up writing them I'd also like to keep some details vague (for the sake of leaving it up to interpretation and everything), but just know that during the time they were still with their original family, they were essentially taught that they should 'wait their turn', and eventually their parents would spend time with them and care for them. Hence the little name I've given them.

So! When they get to the Manor and are officially adopted, only to be neglected and ignored during their first few attempts- because of their young age, they immediately think "oh! they're just like mom and dad!" So they 'wait' for 'their turn', believing that eventually, should they wait long enough, they'll be rewarded with bonding and such from the Batfam just as they were with their previous parents.

This mindset changes what they do as well, as Waiting!Reader even goes out of their way to not bother anyone, or "get in the way" of whatever they could be doing. Waiting!Reader treats the situation so much like their previous home life, that sometimes they might even forget that the Batfam are completely different people from their parents. The only real difference that they can think of is that they're not acknowledged at all and it seems like their 'turn' never comes. Though for a while that doesn't get them down. The Batfam is busy like they're parents were! Waiting!Reader is sure that when things die down then they'll have their time.

... Hopefully.

I can imagine that part of the reason why Waiting!Reader holds on to hope for so long is because, again, their own parents constantly reassured them that they would have their time eventually. That if they behaved, and stayed out of the way, then they would go somewhere fun with their parents and essentially be rewarded for their efforts. They were conditioned to wait, to be patient, and just comply until those around them decided to actually take care of them, and spend time with them.

Of course, as they grow up the reality of the situation does hit them eventually, but during that time they do try.

Waiting!Reader helps Alfred around the house, and so they mostly bond over doing chores, among other things. They are also more mindful, and try to keep the amount of noise they back down— so they actually don't play at the Manor all that often, and instead play literally anywhere else. If and when they do play outside, around the area of the Manor like in the gardens or something, they make sure no one is around before even thinking of playing.

Alfred does help them break a few of their habits that they got while living with their parents, but the one thing he can't seem to 'fix' is how absolutely quiet Waiting!Reader is when they walk around. Which, as on can imagine, doesn't exactly help in a situation where the whole family, except for the butler, is neglecting you.

The amount of times Waiting!Reader has caught Alfred off guard is more then you'd think for someone that works with the Dark Knight, and his various sidekicks and such, over the years. Which does say something, sure, but it's also funny!

Regardless, similar to Quiet!Reader, Waiting!Reader is able to start their musical career earlier than normal, and thuse becomes a little more popular than they would originally. However, they're more known for their live performances and giving back to the community. Seemingly just like Bruce as they attend charity event after charity event, and try to do good by the people.

Waiting!Reader also does genuinely try to become a vigilante as well, but they do so in a way where they only take care of the smaller/medium guys, and leave the bigger ones to the rest of the Batfam. This is because they want to remove possible distractions for their family, and while they would try to take on "bigger guys", they don't think they're skilled enough or experienced enough to even think about it. So they don't even try. (They also don't have the same theme as the Batfam- since they don't want to 'ruin' their reputation with what they're doing or something. Which does hell them further detach themself from the family later on.)

I'd say that with Waiting!Reader, the difference between them and the Batfam is more clear to them? Like, to them, the Batfam are just so good at what they do that they have no hope of reaching them. So instead of trying to reach for them, they just do their own thing and try to help in their own way.

Because Waiting!Reader takes care of smaller guys, they are kind of closer to Waiting!Reader as a vigilante.

The best way I can put it is that while the community trusts Batman and the members of the Batfam to save their city, they trust Waiting!Reader to save their homes.

So basically- Batfam is the bigger picture while Waiting!Reader focuses on the smaller picture.

Nevertheless! Also like Quiet!Reader, Waiting!Reader actually leaves earlier. Except when they leave, they leave.

Waiting!Reader straight up leaves Gotham City to attend the college that they want to go to, in an area that has more opportunity for them, that isn't close to where the Batfam lives or patrols.

So they not only leave earlier, but it also takes the Batfam longer to find them. Especially because Waiting!Reader does still do some things in Gotham, they just don't live there anymore.

I feel like out of all three readers, Waiting!Reader definitely feels like the kind of person that someone would assume is some kind of "Phantom of the Wayne Manor," y'know?

So Alfred definitely tries to make the Batfam feel bad like he does with Quiet!Reader. Except how anyone in the Batfam is reminded that Waiting!Reader even exists, and that they've been gone for a while now is through a letter that is accidentally sent to the Wayne Manor from one of Waiting!Reader's fans. From there, some research does start and the more the Batfam learns, the more they want to go and find the reader- you know the deal.

I hope this answered your question even if I really did ramble on this time- if you'd like me to clarify anything or go into more detail on a specific part, feel free to send in an ask!

#platonic yandere batfam #yandere batfam #gn reader #sibling reader #yandere dc #yandere x gn reader #platonic yandere #yandere alfred #neglected reader #talking daydreams #yandere batman

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cleo-fox · 8 months

Text

Close Quarters

Part 2 of 2

(Part 1)

Summary: The thrilling conclusion to Part 1.

Pairing: Loki x Fem Reader

Warnings: Smut, 18+ (Minors DNI), dirty talk, praise kink, fingering, elevator sex, a hint of dom/sub, Dom Loki, Reader gets a little bratty, little bit of a sir kink, cunnilingus, blow jobs, filth.

A/N: I know I usually choose a Loki GIF but Thomas Sharpe seemed…more appropriate. I’ve got a couple more one shots with these idiots, so if you want to see more, lemme know.

Mercifully, the hallway is empty.

You imagine that your exit from the elevator looks as scandalous as what happened inside it. You are draped in Loki’s arms, still out of breath and a little glassy eyed from the two earth shattering orgasms that he’d given you only minutes prior. In contrast, Loki looks relatively put together and intently focused, like there’s nothing more important on this earth than getting you both back to your suite as quickly as possible. That thought gives you a bit of a thrill—the idea of you wanting him is not necessarily new or unusual, but the idea that he might want you just as much is utterly thrilling.

It occurs to you that you’re in rather close proximity to his neck and it seems like a shame to let that opportunity go to waste. You press your lips against the pulse point in his throat and lazily make your way along his jaw. His breath hitches when you catch his earlobe between your teeth.

“Are you trying to ensure that I take you in the hallway, Mrs. Pine?” he says, his voice dropping deep.

“I won’t be able to scream for you in the hallway,” you breathe into his ear, “and I kinda think you want that.”

“Minx,” he growls, picking up his pace just slightly as you resume kissing his neck.

“I take it that means I’m right,” you say. “Or that I’m in for it when we get back to the room.”

He chuckles. “Oh, it’s both, darling.”

You shiver and nip at his earlobe once more.

Loki drops the glamor as soon as the door to your room shuts behind you and while you like the cropped blond hair of Jonathan Pine, there is something about his natural long, dark locks that drives you wild.

“Let’s me make two things clear, Agent,” he says as he carries you into the bedroom. “First: there are no covers in here; I want you screaming my name when you come. Second—” he sets you down at the foot of the bed. “—I want to taste your pretty cunt.”

Heat and tension coil in your hips. “I can agree to both of those things.”

“Good. Undress.”

He watches as you slowly strip off your swimsuit, his eyes greedy and hungry. Once you’re completely naked, he gives himself a moment to look you over in full, unconsciously licking his lips when his gaze falls on your breasts and hips, his eyes devouring every inch of you. Finally, he nods at the foot of the bed. “Sit.”

You sit down on the bed and he begins unbuttoning his shirt. He takes his time and you watch, enraptured by the slow reveal of his well-muscled chest and taut, flat stomach. The shirt is discarded on the floor with your swimsuit. He undoes his belt, then the button and zip on his shorts.

He’s wearing black boxer briefs, which surprises you—you had assumed that his preference was likely to go commando. But honestly, the boxer briefs are so fitted that the effect is essentially the same: they cling to every dip and swell and leave absolutely nothing to the imagination. The material is taut across his thighs and his cock strains hard at the fabric. If pressed, you could probably create a reasonably accurate sketch based on this view alone.

You don’t have terribly long to contemplate this, though—he kneels in front of you, pulling you in for a slow kiss, his large hands cupping your breasts. His kiss is thorough and sensual, but the addition of his hands kneading your breasts and gently teasing and pinching the sensitive skin of your nipples may actually send you into the stratosphere.

And then he lowers his mouth to your breast and you lose the ability to form coherent thoughts. He strokes his tongue lazily on your nipple in slow circles, lightly teasing the hardened bud with his teeth and bringing another flood of slick arousal to your cunt. Your hips rock fruitlessly against nothing, seeking friction to ease the throbbing pulse of your clit.

You sigh, letting your eyes close and your head tip back, your fingers tangling in his hair. After a moment, you reach for his free hand and guide it between your legs. His fingers dip between your legs, collecting your slickness and gently rolling against your clit.

You moan and he draws back, eyes dark. “Lie back,” he says softly.

You recline on the bed and his focus shifts to you spread out before him. “Lovely,” he says. He is being sincere—and there’s a power in that that thrills you, that sends even more heat and slick to your aching cunt.

When he’s looked his fill, he brings both of your legs over his broad shoulders. He lowers his head to your cunt slowly, first dipping down to inhale your scent and then with one wicked grin, slipping the warm blade of his tongue between your folds.

Your exhale is shaky and turns into a soft whine in the back of your throat as he licks a long, broad stripe from your entrance up to your clit.

“Fuck, Loki.” His name falls from your lips unbidden. You prop yourself up on your elbows and drink in the sight of him between your legs, head bowed like he is worshiping at the most sacred and solemn altar.

In the elevator, he was determined to make you come as quickly as possible; now, though, in the privacy of your room, he seems intent on taking his time and building you up achingly slowly. His tongue laves over your clit at a leisurely pace, teasing and tasting and sucking until he finds the rhythm and movement that makes you try to press your quaking thighs together because it feels so incredible. He gently presses your legs back open, keeping you spread and fully at the mercy of the rolling waves of pleasure that his mouth is creating. One of his long and elegant fingers slides inside of you and curls, pressing against that sweet, soft spot that makes your hips buck and your eyes roll to the back of your head.

When a second finger joins the first a few minutes later, you know that it won’t be much longer. Loki looks up at you, lust-glazed eyes glittering like he knows that too.

You approach the edge slowly, your breath coming in rolling gasps, your hands gripping his hair. He watches you, his gaze both hungry and mischievous. You bite your lip, breath stuttering as you furrow your brow against that final ascent.

And then the tension finally snaps and your head tips back as you tumble off the edge and into your climax, your free fall as decadent and shiver-inducing as the beautifully slow buildup.

You don’t manage to gasp his name because the concept of words has fled you entirely and the only sound that escapes your lips is a sharp cry. From the glint in his eye and the low groan of approval offered against your clit, Loki doesn’t seem to mind at all.

The aftershocks roll through you in rippling waves that make your toes curl and it takes you a moment to catch your breath.

“I confess, I’m quite tempted to stay here all night,” says Loki, placing a gentle kiss on your clit. “You have the sweetest cunt.”

“I bet you say that to all the girls,” you say, your words slurred with pleasure.

“Hardly.” He licks you very slowly from your entrance to your clit and you sigh, running your fingers through his hair. He repeats the same circuit twice more.

“In fact,” he murmurs, placing another kiss on your clit, “I think I may need another taste.” Another lingering kiss, his tongue teasing your entrance. You suck in a shuddering breath.

“One more.” Another long stroke of his tongue and you shiver again.

“Darling, I’m so sorry—” a quick kiss to your clit, “—but I think I’m going to have to make you come again. I'm simply famished.”

Your back arches and you moan as his mouth once again envelopes your clit and his fingers slide back inside you, curling into that soft, sweet spot. You’re a little sensitive, but he’s moving with such achingly perfect precision that you can already feel another orgasm starting to build in your hips.

The ascent is much quicker this time, and you soon find yourself whimpering and panting, your hands tangling again in his hair. He groans against you and you swear you feel the vibrations shimmer all along your aching core.

“Please,” you moan. “Please. I’m so close. Please.”

He lets you ride the edge for a little bit longer, despite your pleas and your iron grip on his hair. But after a minute or so, he seems to take pity on you and he increases his pace just slightly. Your orgasm blossoms in your hips, your cunt clamping down on his fingers as you moan his name to the ceiling.

“That’s my good girl,” he purrs a moment later, as his fingers coax you through the aftershocks. He looks you over, licking his lips. “You’re gorgeous like this, you know,” he says, eyes dragging greedily over your body. “Naked and utterly fucked out. Perfection.”

You shiver and slowly convince your loose muscles to allow you to sit up. “I don’t think you can say I’m fucked out if you haven’t actually fucked me.”

His eyebrow arches, “Is that so?”

You scoot to the edge of the bed so that you can run your hands over his firm chest. You press a kiss just above his belly button, tongue flicking out briefly against his skin. “Seems reasonable to me.”

“Do you want me to fuck you, Agent?” he says, his voice dropping low.

“I mean, that’s what I was hinting at, yes,” you say.

His eyes are hooded as he gives you a sly, calculating smile. “But do you deserve to be fucked, Agent?”

Feeling a little bold, you place your palm flat against the substantial bulge in his boxer briefs, running your hand along the hard, thick length of him. Fuck, he’s big. “Yes,” you say.

“I’m not so sure about that,” he says, his expression and voice deliciously stern despite your hand on his cock. “You’ve been quite pert. Disobedient. Mouthy.”

You think you have an idea where this is going. “So am I getting punished or begging for you to forgive me?” you ask with a coy smile.

The hunger and delight in his gaze makes you ache. “Let’s see what your smart mouth can do to my cock and maybe then I’ll consider fucking you.”

You lick your lips and trace your fingertips along the sharp lines of his Adonis belt, pausing at the waistband of his boxer briefs. You hook your fingertips under the elastic and pull them down.

His cock springs free as the fabric falls to the floor. Between sitting on his lap and the unsubtle nature of the boxer briefs, you knew he was long and thick, but you’re still not fully prepared to experience the full effect of seeing his cock be hard and ready for you.

“Fuck,” you breathe. You take a moment to admire him, despite the fact that you know it’s likely only inflating his ego.

“Do you want me, Agent?” he drawls with a lazy smile. “Do you want my cock?”

“I think you know the answer to that,” you say. “In fact, I’m certain you do.”

“Perhaps I like hearing you say it,” he says, bringing one hand up to stroke your cheek. “Would that be such a terrible thing?”

Impulsively, you get to your feet and pull him into a kiss. You can still taste yourself on him—salty and a little sweet.

“You like hearing me talk about how I want you?” you say, pressing your hips against his.

“Very much.” His voice is a low purr and you shiver in his arms.

“I’m aching for you to fill me,” you murmur, leaning in to kiss him. “I’m dripping just thinking about it.” You nip at his lower lip and he groans against your mouth. “But first, I want to get on my knees and worship your perfect cock with my mouth.”

There's a low, pleased rumble deep in his chest and you shiver as you draw away. “Sit down.”

He sits down on the foot of the bed and you position yourself in front of him, standing between his spread thighs and lowering yourself to your knees. You run your hands up his thighs, lightly dragging your fingernails along his skin, enjoying the slight hitch in his breath. You kiss the inside of his left knee and slowly make your way up the inside of his left thigh, dragging your tongue along his skin every so often. You continue this all the way up to the crease where his thigh meets his hip, close enough that he can feel the heat of your breath on his beautiful cock.

And then you lean back and begin the same process again on his right leg.

“What,” he says, his voice going deep and dark, “did I say about playing games, Agent?”

You tilt your head to look up at him. He’s staring down at you with a stern look that makes your cunt clench.

“You know, I came so hard earlier, I can’t quite recall,” you say, making your eyes as wide and innocent as you can.

“And if you want to come again tonight, you’ll find a way to remember,” he says. He’s stern and authoritative, and it’s ridiculously hot. “Now put that smart mouth to work on my cock,” he growls.

“Yes, sir.” The phrase just sort of slips out, but the way it makes your cunt ache and his eyes glitter is absolutely delicious.

“Oh, I like those manners, pet,” he purrs. “I want to hear more of that.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” you say, pausing to lick your lips, “sir.”

“Good girl.”

His cock is flushed and so hard it presses up against his stomach. You wrap one hand around his shaft and you suck in a breath when your fingers don’t quite meet. He’s huge and the thought of having him inside of you makes you shiver and ache in anticipation.

You stroke him once and lower your mouth to the tip of his cock, placing gentle, closed mouth kisses on it.

He tolerates this for about thirty seconds.

“Agent.” His voice is laced with warning. “I won’t warn you again.”

Your lips curl into a slight smile and you flick your tongue against the tip of his cock, savoring the sharp tang of his pre-come. His eyes glitter down at you, still watching, waiting for you to disobey him.

“Am I not allowed to savor this experience?” you ask, intentionally licking your lips.

“I would urge you to consider that only good girls get to come on my cock, darling,” he says, his voice going dark and deliciously stern. “Choose your next moves wisely.”

The reality is that you desperately want to come on his cock and you wouldn’t put it past him to deny you. So, you offer him a sly smirk before you slowly begin to lick the tip of his cock, gradually opening your lips and bringing him into your mouth.

He groans softly. “You just need a firm hand, don’t you?” he says as you begin to move your head, stroking his shaft in a slow rhythm. His fingers card through your hair as he leans back on one hand, allowing himself to relax a little. “Or perhaps it’s that you want my cock more than you want to be a brat.”

You look up at him and raise an eyebrow. He’s not wrong.

He laughs low in his throat. “Oh, I think I’m going to have you taking my orders by the time the week is up.” He reaches out to stroke your cheek with his thumb. “You have such a needy little cunt and I rather think that will prove to be an advantage for me.”

Your instinct is to let out a low whine, but you also don’t want to give him the satisfaction. You can’t fully stop yourself from reacting, though, and a soft whimper makes its way out of your lips.

He catches this and smirks. “You like being mouthy and talking back, but I think you also crave a little discipline. Being told what to do gets you off, doesn’t it?”

This time, you do whine and he smiles down at you, eyes hooded. “That works out rather nicely,” he says, his voice dropping deep, “because I quite enjoy giving orders.”

You shiver and he notices, running his fingers through your hair.

“Filthy girl,” he purrs. “We’re going to have so much fun together.” He watches you for a minute, eyes hooded, lips slightly parted. “You’re gorgeous like this, too, you know,” he says. “On your knees with my cock in your mouth like a good girl. I could watch this for hours.” You glance up at him and catch his lazy smile. “Though,” he continues, “I suspect you’ll also look gorgeous riding my cock. Or perhaps spread out and tied to the bed.”

This image is too much for you: a high pitched whine makes its way out of your throat before you can think better of it.

“Oh, you like that idea?” he says, not sounding very surprised at all. “You like the thought of being bound and completely at my mercy?”

Another embarrassing whine escapes you before you can stop it.

“We’ll have to explore that some time this week,” he says. “Though I am starting to develop a rather lengthy list of things I want to do to you.”

Fuck. You are caught between wanting him to keep talking and wanting him to shut up so you stop making such embarrassing noises.

Admittedly, the idea of making him feel so good that you render him speechless is also incredibly appealing.

You suck just a little harder, cheeks hollowing as you start running your tongue along the underside of his shaft, swirling it on the tip as you come up.

His eyebrows draw together, his lips parting slightly. “Fuck. That’s it.”

You pick up your pace just a little and he groans, his hand going to grip your hair.

“Yes—just like that.” His grip tightens on your hair. “If your cunt is even half as good as your mouth—fuck, yes, right there—I’m going to have a hard time leaving this room this week.”

You hum against his cock and he groans, his hips starting to rock toward your mouth. “Do you like this?” he asks, his voice husky. “Do you like being on your knees for me?”

You moan against his cock, sucking harder.

“You do, don’t you?” he says, his voice a little unsteady. “Barely an hour and you’re already such a slut for my cock.”

You moan again, bobbing your head up and down his length.

“Such a good girl,” he purrs. “A bit of a brat to start, but I think I’m going to have to reward you for this. Your mouth is too fucking good.”

Another moan slips past your lips. He groans and is quiet for a minute or two, his hips rocking toward you.

His breath is coming in shaky gasps now. “I’m close, love,” he says, his fingers flexing in your hair. “I’m going to spill myself in your pretty mouth and then I’m going to fuck you into the mattress.”

You can’t help but moan, which seems to spur him on. His lips part and you can almost feel how close he is.

He makes the most beautiful noise as he comes, a low groan that seems to reverberate in your cunt as he empties himself into your mouth. You swallow his release greedily as you continue stroking him, your head moving up and down his length.

You pull off of him slowly, licking your lips and you look up at him, your mouth curling into a smirk. “So, was that a proper enough apology for you?” you ask.

He growls low in his chest, eyes opening to look down at you. “You are still far too pert for your own good,” he says. “I suspect I’m going to have to put you over my knee at some point this week. You need discipline.”

You suck in a deep breath as your cunt clenches at the possibility.

“But right now, I need to fuck you.” He gestures to the bed. “Get up here. Now.”

You don’t need any encouragement to follow this command, but the way that he delivers the order and the way his green eyes get all steely is enough for more slickness to collect between your legs. You clamber to your feet, but before you can even try getting on the bed, he’s pulling you to him and flipping you onto your back. He rolls on top of you, caging you in with his body, his impossibly hard cock throbbing against your stomach.

He kisses you, tongue pressing into your mouth, hungry and claiming. “Do you want me inside you?” he purrs against your lips. “Do you want me to fuck you?”

“I need you to fuck me,” you say, spreading your legs and tilting your pelvis up toward him. “I want you to claim me.”

His smile is sharp and he drags the tip of his cock along your cunt, coating himself in your slickness. “Still so fucking wet,” he growls.

“I told you I need you,” you murmur.

He lines himself up at your entrance and ever so slowly begins easing into you. He presses forward, inch by glorious inch, until his hips are flush against yours.

“Oh fuck,” you breathe. “You feel so good.”

He smiles and withdraws just an inch or two before pressing back in. You arch underneath him and let out a soft moan.

“How about that? Is that good?” he asks.

You moan and nod.

He repeats the action. “And this?”

You offer up another moan and he grins. He repeats the action again, clearly teasing you. “What about this one?”

“Loki, please—”

“What is it darling?”

You’re not quite sure if you want to kiss or slap that smirk right off his face.

“Please don’t stop, please—”

“Oh, you want me to keep doing this?” he says, his brow furrowing in mock confusion. “You should have said something.”

“Loki, please—”

He chuckles quietly and begins rocking his hips against yours in slow, shallow thrusts. You sigh and wrap your legs around his waist, meeting his mouth as he kisses you. You can tell he’s holding back, though.

“I’m not going to break,” you finally say, tilting your hips to rock with his. “I want more. I want you to fuck me.”

He kisses you hard and his thrusts lengthen and deepen, his pace increasing just a hair, and you cry out because he’s now hitting that soft, sweet spot and he feels even better.

“You’re taking me so well, darling,” he says. “This snug little cunt was made for my cock, wasn’t it?”

“Yes,” you breathe, arching your back. “Fuck, that’s so good.”

He wraps those long fingers around your ankles and brings your legs up so that they are draped over his shoulders, your body folded in half. He thrusts again and his cock presses even deeper, rubbing against that tender spot inside you. His thumb finds your clit and you whimper. Pressure is starting to build in your hips again.

“You’re getting close already, aren’t you?” he rasps, grinning at you like a devil. “I can feel you starting to tremble.”

You keen, your cunt clenching around his steadily thrusting cock.

“Are you going to be a good girl and come on my cock?” he growls.

You nod, words somewhere beyond you.

“I want you to soak my cock,” he purrs. “Let it all out. Scream for me.”

You feel yourself poised on the edge. So close.

“Come for me, darling, that’s it, let go, come for me, let me feel that sweet cunt milk me dry…”

You arch your back as your orgasm blossoms and unfurls. The sound that falls from your lips is a high pitched keening that would be Loki’s name, except there’s no space for anything besides this incredible feeling, his cock inside you, and the weight of him on top of you.

“Oh there you go, that’s it,” he murmurs. “You have the tightest, most exquisite cunt. I could fuck you for days.”

You moan, shuddering in the final throes, your cunt spasming around his thick cock. He withdraws for a moment and you moan at the loss, but he quickly flips you onto your stomach and slides right back inside you.

From this angle, his cock thrusts even deeper, pressing more directly against your G-spot. A few strokes in and it becomes glaringly apparent to you that you’re going to come again.

“You’re insatiable, aren’t you?” he pants, thrusting hard into you. “I can feel you starting to tremble already.”

You moan into the comforter, arching your back so he hits that spot again.

“Ah, ah, ah,” he scolds, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you up so your back is flush against his chest. “I want to hear every filthy little sound that you make. Every. Last. One.” He thrusts in time with those last three words and you moan.

“You love this, don’t you?” he growls, his hips thrusting hard. “You love me taking you from behind like a fucking animal.”

Your legs are shaking and you can feel your orgasm building. “Loki, I’m gonna come again,” you whimper.

“I know you are, sweet girl,” he growls. “I can feel your tight cunt trembling.” His free hand slides between your legs, fingers rolling over your clit in the same rhythm as his thrusting cock.

Your breath stutters and a low whine escapes your lips. You are deliciously close.

“Please.” Your voice is barely a gasp. You’re riding the very edge of that wave and it feels so good that you’re almost certain the oncoming climax couldn’t possibly feel better. Almost.

“Oh, you’re almost there, love, you can do it,” says Loki, his hand still moving with his hips. “You just need to let go.”

You whimper. You are almost there.

“Be my good girl and let go for me,” he rasps. “Come for me.”

It breaks quite suddenly, your whole body shuddering and your cunt clamping down hard on his cock as you come. The noise you make is animalistic, torn from somewhere deep in your chest.

“Fuck!” Loki is fucking you hard, hips pistoning against your ass. “So fucking tight, you’re like a vise when you come, fuck—” His speech gives way into either Asgardian or Old Norse—you’re not quite sure which, but the idea that you’ve made him feel good enough to abandon English is incredibly appealing.

You’re dreamily floating back down from your high when you hear him make that beautiful noise again, that low, deep groan that falls from his lips only when he comes. You feel his release flood your cunt, hot and thick, as his hips finally start to slow.

It’s another minute or two before he rolls off you, flopping down next to you on the bed. Before you even have a moment to miss him or the comforting weight of his body on yours, he’s wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close.

You both lie there for a long moment, catching your breath.

You think back to your initial meeting with Fury, when you complained about being sent in with Loki. You’ve never been more pleased to be wrong in your entire life.

“So,” you say once you feel capable of speech, “you said you had some ideas for the rest of the week?”

If you thought his grin was devilish before, it’s nothing compared to what he looks like now as he pulls you on top of him.

“Darling,” he says, his voice dropping an octave. “I thought you’d never ask.”

#loki smut #loki x reader #loki x reader smut #loki fanfic #loki imagine #loki laufeyson smut #loki laufeyson #loki x female reader #loki fanfiction #loki x yn smut #loki x you #loki x you smut #loki x female reader smut #loki x y/n #loki odison x reader

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delta-orionis · 24 days

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How Big are Iterators?

One thing Rain World does very well is portraying a sense of scale when it comes to iterators. They're massive superstructures large enough to have entire cities built on their roofs, and their processes are literally so powerful that they alter the natural environment around them.

I think in-game they're kind of meant to be unknowably huge, especially since the player character is literally a small animal who can't possibly fathom an iterator's entire extent. Despite this, I decided to try and figure out exactly how big they are.

Just a warning, this post is a bit long. I really fell down a rabbit hole here.

In-Game Clues

Five Pebbles and Looks to the Moon are the only iterators that the player can explore, but they're so huge that it's impossible to see exactly how big they are from so close. The only glimpse we get is from atop the big tree in Outer Expanse, where Five Pebbles' superstructure can be seen in the distance.

He's so big that his entire can doesn't even fit on the screen.

(Ditto, minus the clouds)

With nothing else close by to compare him to, it's almost impossible to tell exactly how big he is from this image.

However, we can see the entirety of other iterator cans in the distance from atop The Wall.

Here's what they look like not obscured by clouds:

The Speculation Zone

I made some assumptions about iterators to make my calculations easier.

An iterator's can (the large rectangular section) is 2 times as wide as it is tall.

Their legs are 1/2 the height of their can.

Their can is half obscured by a relatively uniform cloud layer.

These assumptions might not be entirely accurate, but they make the math easier.

Cloud Layer Height

At first I was tempted to try and estimate iterator height based on the cloud layer surrounding them, but I made the mistake of assuming the cloud layer is made up of rain-bearing nimbostratus clouds (which can reach up to 5km in height). This would make them literally taller than Mt. Everest. Iterators are big, but I don't think they're that big. I think it's safer to assume that the cloud layer is made up of low-lying stratus clouds that form a thick fog.

The way iterator rain functions could be an entirely different discussion, but I personally think it's caused by a sudden expulsion of large quantities of hot water vapor which very quickly condenses into rain clouds. A topic for another time, maybe. The takeaway is that I think the weather created by iterators doesn't have a clear analogue to real life weather, and it's misguided to assume that they function the same way.

Skyscraper Height

One thing that iterators have that can be compared to real life, however, is cities.

The largest buildings in these cities can be seen at a distance.

This in-game iterator sprite is 122 pixels tall, and the tallest building visible is 20 pixels tall. This means the top of this iterator's can is 5.6 times as tall as the tallest building on its roof.

We can compare these skyscrapers to the largest buildings on Earth. This requires some additional assumptions:

While the civilization that built the iterators is likely able to create skyscrapers much taller than the ones humans have created, I'm going to assume that the ones visible here are comparable in size.

I'm also going to assume that these skyscrapers are residential buildings, built to fit a high population density on top of an iterator. The tallest buildings on Earth tend to have very tall antenna spires which add to their overall height but are not inhabitable. Residential skyscrapers tend to be significantly shorter, so I'm going to use them as a comparison rather than the tallest skyscrapers on Earth in general.

According to Wikipedia, the current tallest residential skyscrapers range from about 300 meters to 475 meters tall. I'm going to assume the one in-game is 400 meters tall, as a nice even number.

5.6(400m) = 2240m

This would make an iterator's height, from ground level to the top of their can, about 2240 meters (2.24 kilometers, 1.4 miles).

Here's a diagram comparing that to the heights of some of the tallest free-standing manmade structures:

And here's a size comparison between a typical iterator can and Mount Everest:

Smaller than a mountain, but still huge.

Conclusions

Based on these estimates, I think typical iterator cans are about 2 kilometers (1.24 miles) in height.

This would make iterators significantly taller than anything created by humans, but I personally think an advanced society like the one that created the iterators would have no problem creating a structure this tall. (They canonically created thousands of iterators, after all.)

This estimate is also much shorter than my misguided original calculation, which made them taller than an entire mountain. While I do think iterators are meant to be unfathomably huge, I don't think there would be enough material on the planet to feasibly create thousands of identical mountain-sized superstructures. The player is also able to ascend from the ground to the top of Five Pebbles in just a few cycles (if they're quick), and I think it's much more feasible for an animal like a slugcat to be able to ascend a height of ~2km in a couple of days than to climb up an entire mountain. But again, this is pure speculation.

I made a ton of assumptions and rounded a bunch of numbers, so I could be completely wrong. There's probably other ways you could try to estimate an iterator's height that I haven't explored here. Let me know what you think; I love hearing about other people's ideas and theories.

Thank you for reading!

#delta’s wild lore speculation corner #rain world #rain world iterator #rw iterator #rain world theory #iterators

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ennas-aesthetic · 6 months

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What the fuck is Jesus up to in Good Omens season 3?

This is a question I've been thinking long and hard these past couple of days and I have some THOUGHTS SO. Buckle up.

Aziraphale and Crowley watching the Crucifixion (Good Omens, 2019)

First off. The answer to the question posited is relatively simple. What is Jesus up to in GO3? With s2's ending in mind and with the hints we've gotten for 668: Neighbor of the Beast over the years, we know he's descending to Earth to initiate the Second Coming. And that Aziraphale would probably make that happen - or do everything that he can as Supreme Archangel to sabotage it.

But I wanted to examine on how Jesus might fit into Good Omens' overall narratives and established themes - about morality and humanism and free will, and. I'm just saying, there are A LOT of fascinating routes they could do for his character.

(Disclaimer as usual: this is a theory that I obsessed over when I was stuck at the cemetery during All Souls' Day and must be treated as such. In no way am I insisting this should be how canon events must happen. I am just doing this for the funsies.)

The THING about Jesus if you situate him in the world of Good Omens (with the assumption that most of the pop culture Christology mythos associated with him remain intact) is that in this context he very quickly becomes: 1. Adam Young's narrative foil; and 2. an Aziraphale parallel.

Now, the first one is obvious. Of COURSE he is Adam Young's foil, duh. Adam isn't called the ANTICHRIST for nothing. Brought into the world just for the sole purpose of ending it. However, when the time comes for him to fulfill the Will of his Satanic Father, Adam flat out REFUSES.

Both the book and the show attribute this to Adam's human upbringing. He was raised as a human, and because of that he has the trait that the book uses to DEFINE human beings: free will. At the end, Adam had the AGENCY to reject the destiny planned out for him.

'Adam stood smiling at the two of them, a small figure perfectly poised exactly between Heaven and Hell.

Crowley grabbed Aziraphale's arm. "You know what happened?" he hissed excitedly. "He was left alone! He grew up human! He's not Evil Incarnate or Good Incarnate, he's just… a human incarnate—"'

- (Good Omens, 1990)

That is NOT what happened to Jesus.

Adam Bond as Jesus in Good Omens (2019)

Like Adam, he was raised as a human -- being a human incarnate was his WHOLE DEAL in Christology. In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was made flesh and dwelt among us... yada yada yada.

UNLIKE, Adam, though, Jesus wasn't able to REJECT his Destiny of Dying Really Horribly and Painfully on the Cross. Narratives in the Bible also made it clear that the Crucifixion was NOT his Will, but that of God's. Like... him begging to be spared from torment but ultimately following God's Will is such an important event entire devotional practices are made out of it.

"39 And he went a little farther, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt."

- (Matthew 26: 39, KJV)

We get a glimpse of that in s1ep3 of Good Omens, too:

"JESUS

(muttering through the pain)

Father, please . . . you have to forgive them . . . they don’t know what they are doing . . .

Crowley, in black, comes up next to Aziraphale.

CROWLEY

You’ve come to smirk at the poor bugger, have you?

AZIRAPHALE

Smirk? Me?

CROWLEY

Well, your lot put him on there.

AZIRAPHALE

I am not consulted on policy decisions, Crawley."

- (The Quite Nice and Fairly Accurate Good Omens Script Book, 2018)

SO. Here we have the character of the Christ whose free will and agency had been STRIPPED from him in the guise of a "noble sacrifice." He comes back again on this Earth to fulfill another "inescapable destiny."

Aziraphale and Crowley need to stop him. The solution the Good Omens narrative offers to "inescapable destinies and systems" (both in s1 and s2) is for the character to realize they have the freedom to choose their own fates. It happened with Adam, and it happened with Gabriel, and perhaps it will happen to Jesus.

(At this point my sister frowned and said: "Are you telling me you think Aziraphale and Crowley are going to help Jesus realize he has agency and that him Dying on the Cross for the 'Great Plan' was kinda fucked up actually?" which sounds crazy when you put it like that BUT NEVER SAY NEVER BABIE.)

Because that brings me to my second point: if this all happens, Jesus becomes an AZIRAPHALE parallel.

In the same way Anathema is an Aziraphale parallel and Sergeant Shadwell is an Aziraphale parallel. Here is a character stuck in a suffocating status quo. To save the world, he needs to know he can escape that status quo and decide for himself. In the same way Anathema has to learn how to stop being a descendant or Shadwell to stop being a Witchfinder, or Gabriel to stop being an Archangel, and Adam to stop being an Antichrist, perhaps Jesus has to learn he can stop being... Well, the Christ, as well.

And this, of course, supplements Aziraphale's journey of letting go of the idea of being an idealized vessel of God, so he could finally enjoy the freedom of personhood and choice on Earth, with Crowley.

Or they could turn Jesus into a cackling villain who Aziraphale and Crowley need to kill in season 3, and I'd probably eat that up, too.

#good omens #good omens meta #good omens 2 #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #this was such an insane meta post to make but i had to do it #putting my religious trauma to good use iktr #enna rambles

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justagalwhowrites · 25 days

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Yearling - Ch. 33: Discovery

You, Joel and Tommy go on patrol. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-32 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Canon-typical violence. Torture. Smut :). No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only

Length: 9.8k

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

February, 2028

“Bambi, tell your husband to stop being a wuss.”

“Wuss?” Joel shifted to look around you to his little brother. “Who you callin’ a wuss?”

“Think I’ll call my brother-in-law a dumbass instead,” you smirked over toward Tommy. “Seems more accurate.”

“You tellin’ me we shouldn’t be following that path there?” Tommy nodded toward a worn spot in the snow on the other side of the river where the three of you had stopped, sitting astride your horses. “The one that looks like it could’ve been made by a dozen fuckin’ men?”

“Who knows how old that is,” Joel said. “Been weeks since it snowed. And water’s lookin’ high. Would be real easy to end up cold and wet for no damn reason…”

“Seem awful scared of winding up cold and wet for someone who’s not a wuss,” Tommy teased.

“I don’t want my wife,” Joel stressed the word and you smiled a little, tucking your chin into your chest to hide it. “Being cold and wet and getting sick because you’ve got some harebrained idea that we need to run down some track that’s long dead.”

“Bambi, c’mon,” Tommy said. “You know I’m right, you know the horses can handle it and you know Joel’s just bein’ paranoid because you’re here.”

Joel wasn’t about to tell Tommy that he was right. At least, not while he was out on his first patrol since the incident in November. It would just worry you, might make you drag him back to Jackson before patrol was done. But Tommy was right. Joel had been nervous all day, worrying about seeing you hurt. Worrying that, whoever had been after him would hurt you, too. That wasn’t something he could abide at any time but now that you were his wife, it was more vital. It felt different somehow.

A lot of things did.

Not that there had been much tangible change since the two of you had said your vows that night in Joel’s bed. Since the attack, you hadn’t slept at your own house even once, you were already living together in every way that mattered. Ellie and Savvy had become like sisters in the few months that Savvy had been in Jackson, you like a mother to his daughter and him like a father to yours. And Joel had always been driven to protect you, from the first moment he saw you he knew he would do damn near anything to keep you safe. But the sense of peace and permanence he had calling you his wife made life alongside you another thing entirely. Protecting and caring for you was all the more necessary now.

The girls had taken the news well, all things considered. Joel hadn’t really been worried about Ellie’s reaction, of course. You were the closest thing she had to a mother and lord knew the girl had been working overtime trying to shove you and Joel back together after you’d left.

But he could tell you’d been worried about telling Savvy.

“That ring fittin’ OK?” He asked as he brought you a cup of coffee in bed just as the sun started to rise on Christmas morning.

“Hm?” You looked up at him from your spot nestled into the pillows, chest bare and blankets over your lap like they had been the night before as the two of you made promises to each other. The hand that was twisting your ring around and around on your finger stilled.

“You’re fidgetin’ something fierce there, Mrs. Miller,” he smiled a little and handed you the cup of coffee. “Wanted to know if that ring was fittin’ OK or if you were just getting cold feet on me.”

“It fits great,” you smiled a little over the coffee cup, taking a sip. “And no, no cold feet.”

“Alright,” he said, sitting in bed beside you in nothing but his pajama pants. His fingers trailed up the bare skin of your arm. “Then I think you should tell me what’s on that pretty mind of yours.”

“You’re gonna get us in trouble, touching me like that,” you said, taking another sip of coffee. “Girls will be here soon…”

“Oh I can be quick,” he teased. “But I’d rather not rush our wedding… well, morning…”

You rolled your eyes but laced your fingers with his, brushing his ring as you did.

“Talk to me,” he said, turning serious. “Don’t want to start this off with secrets.”

“It’s not a secret,” you sighed, looking at his hand for a moment longer before looking him in the eye. “But… I don’t want to hurt Savvy. I want this with you more than almost anything else. The only thing I want more is for her to be OK. I just don’t know how to tell her.”

Joel nodded slowly, watching you.

“Want to do it together?” He asked gently. You raised your eyebrows. “I don’t want to get in the way of anything but I don’t want you thinkin’ you’re in this alone because you’re not. That’s the whole point.”

You laughed once and then sighed.

“It might help,” you said after a moment. “I think she likes you more than she likes me.”

“Don’t think that’s true,” he said. “She’s just… dealing with some complicated things. And there ain’t a real guidebook for regular parenting, let alone how you raise a kid after the world ends. She loves you. She really does.”

“Should we tell the girls together then?” You asked, looking uncertain.

“I think, if you’re OK with that?” Joel shrugged. “Yeah. I’d like to do that with you.”

You smiled a little and the two of you adjusted in bed so that you were in his arms, your skin soft against his. You finished your coffee and got dressed just before the clatter of teenaged girls took over the house not long after.

Joel kept you tucked against his side as the two of you watched the girls open their gifts, his lips brushing your temple and giving you a squeeze when he could sense you getting tense. He gathered the two of them that afternoon as the four of you got ready to head to Tommy and Maria’s for dinner, your hands stuffed into the back pockets of your jeans as you paced the kitchen until Ellie and Savvy were there and you joined him at his side.

“What’s up?” Ellie frowned, looking between the two of you.

“Well,” Joel said gently. “We were hopin’ to talk to you girls about something…”

“Oh God,” Ellie groaned. “Please tell me no one’s doing anything stupid…”

“Nothin’ stupid,” Joel smiled a little, slipping an arm through yours to curve around your back and tug you close to his side. You looked up at him for a moment but he didn’t need to look back to know that you were on the verge of panic. He could feel it, your whole body was tense, your breaths short and shallow. “Something real good, actually. We wanted the two of you to know before anyone else but… well, we decided to get married.”

“Oh shit!” Ellie’s eyes went wide for a minute. “Congrats! It’s about damn time, honestly.”

Savvy, however, was silent. She looked between the two of you, her brows drawn together, a small frown on her face before she stalked out of the room.

You pulled away from Joel immediately and he went to follow you but you put up a hand and shook your head before chasing her down.

“Shit,” Ellie, said quietly, staring out the back door that you and Savvy had just left through. Joel clenched his jaw for a moment, resisting the urge to go find you no matter how badly he might want to.

“Still a sore subject for her, huh?” Joel asked Ellie after a moment.

She sighed.

“I really wish Bambi would give her some idea of what happened,” she said. “Because she really seems to think that she had some kind of easy fucking time… She asked me a little bit about it after you both got back last month. I guess she overheard the doctors talking but I didn’t know what to fucking say. I don’t think she’s actually pissed about the two of you. I think she’s pissed at the idea that she was on her own while her mom was having some happy life here.”

Joel sighed for a moment before giving in and following you out the back door. You were standing in the snow, halfway back to Ellie’s place, your back to him as you focused on Savvy.

“Don’t let me get in the way of whatever dream life you’re tryin’ to have here,” her tone was sharp. “Didn’t let me hold you back before…”

“That’s not what this is,” you said, calm and steady. But Joel could hear the pain on your voice. “You’re the most important thing in the world to me and…”

“You’ve got a funny way of showing that!”

Savvy noticed him then, narrowing glaring at him for a moment. You looked back over your shoulder to him, your eyes large and round and watery. He came up behind you, a hand going to the small of your back as he pressed himself against your shoulder.

“Baby girl,” Joel said gently. “I know this is something that’s big…”

“No shit,” she snapped in a way that was so Ellie that Joel considered talking to the older girl about how she spoke around the younger one.

“But,” he continued. “You and Ellie are our number one priority. Always have been…”

She scoffed and rolled her eyes, looking into the distance instead of at either one of you.

“Us getting married is just about me and Joel,” you said, pressing yourself back into him. “It doesn’t mean we’re choosing each other over you, it doesn’t mean we love you any less. It just means we wanted to make that commitment to each other, that’s all.”

She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment before looking back at you.

“So what does this mean, then?” She asked. “What’s going to change?”

You looked up at Joel for a moment before looking back to her.

“Not a lot, really,” you said. “We haven’t really talked about where we’re going to live but that’s not too different from how things have been the past few weeks. No one here uses my real name, anyway, and you have your father’s last name, not mine, so even if I did decide to take Joel’s name, it wouldn’t change anything for you.”

She nodded slowly, considering. Joel marveled, for a moment, at how your daughter held her face just like you when she was thinking, the same purse to her lips, the same scrunch of her brow. You’d passed on so much to her even if you didn’t give her your blood.

“Think you can be OK with this?” You asked gently after a moment. “I don’t want to hurt you, honey. I love you more than anything, I don’t want you to be unhappy, especially not because of me.”

“I don’t want you to be unhappy, either,” Savvy said quietly. “I just… I still don’t really get this place. I’m making friends, I’m going to school but… it’s all so different. I still don’t know how I feel about any of it.”

“I know,” you said quietly, reaching out and cupping your daughter’s cheek. Joel held his breath for half a moment, until he realized that she wasn’t going to pull away from your touch. “And I’m sorry I didn’t find you sooner or get you here when you were smaller and it would have been easier.”

“I don’t want to be angry,” she said, her voice thick and wet. “I’m so tired, Mom.”

“I know,” you said again, pulling her into you and holding her to your chest. She was stiff for a moment before relaxing into you, her arms going around your waist. “I know, baby.”

It got easier after that. At least on the surface. Savvy was still distant but she didn’t seem to be as antagonistic as she had been before. You moved into Joel’s house - though you traded the sound system at your house for Joel’s - and you set up one of the bedrooms upstairs for Savvy, even though she was still living at Ellie’s.

“At some point, Ellie is going to need her space,” you said, moving the twin sized bed for the fourth time, the wood groaning across the floor as you shoved it into a new place. “She’s a grown woman now…”

“Rather not think about that,” Joel grumbled, even though he’d been trying to find a way to talk to Ellie about her friendship with Jesse in particular. They seemed… close. And who knew what she’d been taught in that damn FEDRA school.

“Think about it or not,” you said, standing back, hands on your hips as you looked at your handiwork. “It’s comin’ for you. She’s going to want to actually live an adult life and that means adult space. Would rather her not feel like she needs to move out of the backyard right away to have that. So… Savvy can just come here.”

Joel thought it was a bit optimistic to think that Savvy would be willing to come here, but he couldn’t bring himself to say that. You were finally showing signs of hope about your relationship with your daughter. You’d been suffering with her so far away. You had done a good job of hiding it - he doubted anyone but him had noticed - but you couldn’t keep going like that, not forever. He didn’t want to ruin it, not now.

Your hopeful nature around Savvy was just another way the world seemed to be changing. The patrols outside Jackson were reporting more and more signs of people and, with them would come more infected. Patrols were starting to pick up and Joel felt the push to make himself useful again with more urgency than ever.

While Jackson was filled with incredibly skillful riders and hunters, Joel knew he was one of the best. Many of the folk here had lived a life that didn’t involve much struggle - at least, relatively speaking - after the outbreak. He’d survived with blood and he was more than willing to shed some more to protect his home and his family. Sitting on the sidelines, lame and useless, didn’t suit him.

He’d learned to avoid the gates and the stables when patrols were coming and going, not wanting to look at the men and women who got to go out and actually make themselves useful with envy that was rooted in the self loathing that had started to bloom inside of him.

He started going to talk to the doctors at least once a week, seeing if he’d made enough progress to start going outside the walls of the city again. It was slow going. Getting approved for sex and lighter work around town was one thing. Getting the OK to go outside and hunt down raiders was - apparently - another matter entirely. But, eventually, he got a hesitant OK from both doctors.

Joel got them to put it in writing - feeling only a little bit like a school boy taking a report card home to his mother - and headed straight for the stable to show you. You were working with a horse, one that had been foaled in Jackson right around the time he’d first found you in the snow. It was old enough now that you could work with it, accustomed enough to people that you’d told him you thought you’d be able to get the horse to broke fast. He stood and watched you for a bit, you standing beside her and getting her used to someone putting pressure on her body to guide her, talking to her in that gentle voice you used when working with animals.

“You gonna just stand there and watch, cowboy?” You asked after a few minutes, not looking over your shoulder to him but Joel knew you were smiling all the same. “Or is there something I can do for you?”

“Man need a reason to come look at his wife?” He asked. You twisted look at him at that and he was right, you were smiling. “I don’t think he does. Not when she’s as pretty as you, anyway.”

“Uh huh,” you looked back to the horse, giving her a treat of some kind. “Feel like you’re tryin’ to butter me up over there.”

“Maybe,” he shrugged. “Or maybe I just needed to look at ya for a minute.”

“Gimme five minutes,” you said, throwing a mischievous look over your shoulder. “Then maybe you can do more than look.”

Joel laughed a little and watched you finish up with the horse before you led her inside and put her in her stall, him trailing behind you. In all honesty, he was happy to watch you work. You were so good with them, you cared so deeply. It was enthralling in the best possible way, just the physical manifestation of one of the infinite reasons he loved you.

You latched the stable door when you were done with the horse and stood close to Joel, taking his shirt by the fistful and pulling him against you so you could kiss him. He was happy to let you, one of his hands finding your face to hold you in just the right spot so he could dip his tongue into your mouth while you moaned against his lips.

“Before this goes too far,” he said after pulling back from you. “Should talk about something…”

“Should we?” You asked, tugging him against you for another kiss.

“Mhmm,” he hummed against your mouth. You released him and stepped back a little, frowning. He smiled a little. “S’nothing bad, don’t gotta look so worried about it.”

“Alright,” you said, a hint of challenge in your voice. “Then what is it?”

“Well,” he said, holding your gaze and trying to shake the feeling that he’d done something he shouldn’t have. “Talked to the doctors…”

Your eyes narrowed.

“And they’ve OKed me to go out on patrol again…”

“GodDAMMIT Joel!” You stomped away from him, back to him, arms crossed. He gave you a moment to seethe, his hands in his pockets, thumbs drumming a stuttering rhythm on the denim. After a few deathly quiet seconds, you turned back. “Really? You really want to go get yourself fuckin’ killed…”

“Sweetheart…”

“Are we just not enough for you?” You demanded, stalking up to him, arms still crossed tightly in front of you. “Me, Ellie, Savvy. Are we not enough? Do you need to go get some kind of goddamn adrenaline rush, is that it?”

He resisted the urge to fight you on it. Your eyes were watery and wide and pleading.

“You know that’s not what it is, baby,” he whispered. A single tear slipped down your cheek and he reached out to gently take your face in his hand, catching it on his thumb. “You’re more than enough, you’re more than I deserve. And you know I don’t want to hurt you…”

“Don’t make this about me,” you snapped. He ignored that, too.

“But we need people who can keep Jackson safe,” he said. “For you, for our girls. I can do that. You know I can…”

“You can’t if you get yourself fuckin’ killed!” You took a deep breath and centered yourself for a moment. “You’re still limping…”

“I know,” he nodded slowly. “But they think I’ll probably limp at least a little for the rest of my life. S’OK. I can ride just fine, won’t hurt me bein’ able to fight…”

“Bullshit.”

“It’ll be OK,” he said gently. “And I’m willin’ to go out with you or Tommy….”

“And,” you cut him off.

Joel frowned.

“And?”

“Me and Tommy,” you replied. “Deal’s changed. You’re limping, you can’t go out with just one of us, it has to be both.”

He sighed.

“Bambi…”

“You want me on board?” You asked. “That’s the deal.”

He sighed again.

“We can talk with Maria,” he said. “See if we have the space for it.”

“Alright,” you said “Because I’m not going to just sit here and watch you get yourself hurt or killed. That’s not what I signed up for.”

“Not what I’m asking you to do,” he said gently. “I don’t want to not come home to you, baby. But I need to make sure I’m doin’ my part to keep Jackson safe.”

It had taken a few weeks for things to line up right with patrols and Joel could feel how tense you were leading up to the day the three of you were heading out. You’d clung to him especially hard the night before. Ellie and Savvy had joined the two of you for dinner and then to play cards and you’d held it together pretty well until they left. But the second they were gone it was like a switch flipped. You pressed yourself against his side, your arms wrapped around his bicep, your head tight against his shoulder.

“You alright?” He frowned.

“Fine,” you said, voice tight.

When he took you to bed, you rode him aching and slow until you came and collapsed on top of him, Joel only lasting a few more deep thrusts into your tight heat before coming undone himself. He held you there, your head against his chest as his hand trailed a slow and easy path up and down your spine. He was still inside you when he felt your tears on his chest.

“Baby,” he said softly.

“Don’t make me come back alone,” you said, lifting your head from his chest enough to look at him, the rest of you still tight against his body. “Please, Joel. Don’t make me lose you, too.”

“Not losing me,” he held your face in his hands. “Promise.”

“You’ll always come back for me?” You whispered.

“Always,” he said softly. “I promise. As long as you promise to always be there to come back to.”

“Promise,” you said quietly.

He’d been worried about how the patrol was going to go after that, but you, him and Tommy had fallen back into your usual patterns easily once you were outside Jackson and you let yourselves relax into them a bit.

It had been an easy patrol until the three of you stopped to give the horses a chance to take a drink and saw the tracks across the river. And Joel couldn’t seem to shake the clutch of fear that gripped him at the thought of putting you in harm’s way by following the trail.

“Tommy, I swear to God, you ever hold this against me…” you began, but he cut you off.

“You’ll shoot me?” Tommy teased.

“Trample you with a horse,” you replied. “But… yeah. You’re right. We should check that trail.”

Joel gave you a look and you just looked back, your brows raised. He sighed.

“Alright,” he said. “Tommy, you take the lead since this is your damn scheme.”

“C’mon lovebirds,” he said, starting across the water. “Sooner we follow this path, sooner we can get back to town and the sooner you two can go back to leavin’ me out of whatever it is you two do.”

Joel was about to give Tommy shit but you beat him to it, lobbing a snowball at him and hitting him straight in the face. Joel barked a laugh as you tried to stifle yours, your arms crossed demurely over your saddle horn.

“Nice,” Tommy said as the snow slid off his face. “Real nice.”

“Well, say stupid shit, win stupid prizes,” you shrugged, smirking a little.

“Not cool, Bambi,” he said, wiping his face clean. “Not cool.”

“You’re right,” you replied, smirk growing. “Think it’s technically cold…”

Tommy leaned around you to look at Joel.

“You’ve had too much influence on your wife,” he said. “I remember when she was a nice girl…”

“Bullshit,” you said.

“Wouldn’t even look at someone mean…”

“Tommy, she’d have always kicked your ass whenever you did somethin’ dumb enough to ask for it,” Joel smiled, a little proud. “Now let’s move before you give ‘er another reason.”

Tommy wiped the last of the snow from his skin with a good natured shake of his head and started off. You called Gatling back into her spot on your saddle as Joel nodded for you to be in between the two of them so he could bring up the rear. At least this way, Joel or Tommy would get hit before you would.

The three of you followed the tracks for a few hours, until things shifted. You noticed it first, that the footprints in the snow looked more well traveled, like people were coming and going from this point in the forest more often than all the way to the water.

“There,” you said quietly, nodding to the brush off the trail. Joel looked where you indicated, a baited trap primed and ready.

“That ain’t been there long,” Tommy said. Joel came up alongside you, closer than he’d normally try to be when on horseback. But it kept the rising fear in him calmer, more contained. He looked around at the ground, the snow so worn down it was hard to have even a remote idea of how many people had been through here recently. Gatling gave a low, rumbling growl and you soothed her with a pet.

“We should go back,” Joel said. “Get backup…”

“That’d be wise.”

Your gun was drawn before Joel or Tommy could reach theirs and you twisted in your saddle to look behind you. Joel turned, too, his sidearm drawn, a group of six men on foot standing about 20 feet back. Their rifles were drawn, at least two of them trained on you. Joel’s jaw clenched.

“Why don’t you folks get off those horses,” a man at the middle of the group said. “See what we can figure out.”

You glanced toward Joel before you whistled Gatling down and started to dismount before he had a chance to argue. Joel did, too, arranging himself in front of you - Tommy at his side, shielding you, too - before stepping closer to the group. Joel slung his rifle forward on his arm but kept it tilted toward the man’s legs and not his head. The man who’d spoken smirked.

“Haven’t seen you out this way before,” the man said. “Care to tell us where you’re from?”

“Not really,” Tommy said as Joel looked the group over. They were all large and broad, young and cocky. Looked to be well fed. These weren’t travelers passing through, of that he was almost certain. “You can tell us, though, seein’ as you’re traipsin’ through our territory.”

“Your territory?” The man raised his brows. “Seems like a bold claim for two men and their… pet to make.”

Tommy snapped his rifle up before Joel did.

“Say that shit about her again,” he snapped. “Fuckin’ dare you.”

Your hand went in the middle of Joel’s back, right between his shoulder blades, a gentle and grounding force, before you appeared at his side, Gatling practically glued to your calve.

“Bambi,” Joel growled, your hand trailing over his back before raising your rifle.

The man looked at you, amused.

“She’s come to play,” he smiled. “That’s good, I like ‘em with a little fight…”

“Trust me when I tell you that I’m doing you a favor, giving you the chance to deal with me,” you said, sounding almost eerily calm. “Try me and they’ll kill you. Assuming I don’t kill you first.”

Gatling growled at your feet, crouched and ready to spring.

“Now,” you said. “Where are you from.”

The man looked at you for a moment, all but licking his lips, before turning back to Joel and Tommy.

“You really let your little woman run the show?” He asked. “Can think of a lot better uses for her smart mouth…”

Gatling snarled and flattened her ears against her head. Joel’s eyes narrowed, raising his gun so it was now aimed at the man’s chest, not his legs.

“That’s my wife you’re talkin’ about,” he strained to keep his voice calm. “Now, you gonna tell us where you’re from or are you gonna make me gun you down?”

“How about this,” the man said, still seeming over confident. “You tell us where you’re from, maybe let us have a little fun with your whore wife, you go on your merry way. Otherwise, we can just kill you.”

Joel’s jaw clenched. Tommy adjusted his grip on his gun and Joel gave him a look before glancing over to you.

“Any of them look familiar?” He asked, voice dangerous and low.

“No,” you said. “Don’t know any of them.”

Joel focused back on the men.

“Good.”

He reached out an arm and swept you behind him a half second before he started shooting, Tommy following suit almost immediately. The men shot back, a bullet glancing off Joel’s shoulder as they did. You, of course refused to stay where Joel had tucked you for long. You stepped alongside him, firing, too, as Joel tried not to be distracted by the terrifying possibility of you, bleeding on the ground.

But the three of you were lucky. The men clearly hadn’t been doing this long. Joel wasn’t sure if they were just bad shots or if shooting and killing a person wasn’t something they were really comfortable with yet but either way, they’d dropped five of them, the sixth taking off, a bullet hole in his leg.

You lowered your gun.

“Gatling,” you panted before snapping and pointing toward the man. “Capture.”

She shot off like a rocket, her ears pressed flat against her head. The man was no match for her speed and she launched herself at him, her jaws clamping around the man’s bicep as she wrenched his body to the ground.

You took a deep breath and then looked to Joel’s arm, where there was now a hole in his jacket that the cold air bit through and a small spray of blood.

“Why do you always find some way to get fuckin’ shot?” You asked, your thumbs gently tracing the outside edge of the small wound.

“Just talented I suppose,” Joel smiled a little before looking over at Tommy. “You OK?”

“Fine,” he slung his rifle over his shoulder. “Should question that fucker and get the hell out of here before worse shows up.”

Joel led the way, drawing his knife. The three of you stood over the man, the same one who’d done all the talking before. He seemed much less cocky now, whimpering as Gatling growled around the meat of his arm.

“Call off your fucking dog!” He sobbed. “Fuck, please! I’ll tell you whatever you want, please!”

“Not one to give in to demands like that, but…” Joel looked at you.

“Gatling,” you said. “Release.”

The dog dropped the man’s arm and came to stand against your side, her ribs pressed to your leg. Joel caught the man’s shoulder with the toe of his boot and rolled him onto his back. He tried to sit up but Joel stopped him, pressing his foot into the wound from Gatling’s jaws on the man’s arm. He cried out as Joel forced him to the ground and Tommy kicked the man’s gun away.

“Now,” Joel said, getting down low and putting a knee at the center of the man’s chest. “You’re gonna answer some questions for us.”

***

Normally, watching Joel hurt someone would turn your stomach. It wasn’t a sight you enjoyed to begin with and you’d never seen him torture someone since you’d known how he learned how to. The fact that he had anything in common with the man bleeding on the ground made your stomach clench.

But this was different. Savvy was back in Jackson now. There were a lot of lines you were more than willing to cross to keep men like this far, far away from her. Including this one.

You rested your hand on Gatling’s head, the warmth of her fur comforting and familiar.

“Look at her,” Joel said, taking the man’s chin in his hand and forcing him to face you before looking at you himself. “You sure you don’t know him? Want to make sure I make this worse if you do.”

“I’m sure,” you said. It was oddly comforting, his threat. It was good to know that Joel was still Joel, even when doing stuff like this.

He nodded once and looked back at the man.

“Count yourself lucky,” he said. “She’s makin’ this easier for you. Now, where are you from.”

“Territory north west of here,” he panted. “In Idaho.”

“What brings you down this way?” Joel asked.

The man was silent for a moment outside of his labored breaths, his eyes closed in a wince. Joel sighed, sounding exasperated before lifting his knife.

“I’m gonna ask again,” Joel said. “Last time it’ll be nice. Why are you here.”

“Why should I tell you, hm?” The man spat. “You’re just gonna hurt me, kill me anyway, what goddamn difference does it make?”

“Now see, that’s just a bad attitude to have,” Tommy said, kneeling next to the man. He grabbed a fistful of his hair and forced his head to turn. “We can make this real hard or real easy. We got a lot of incentive to make this easy. We want to get back home to our families, don’t want to just be out here in the cold for hours on end because you’re being a goddamn dumbass. But, we have shit we need to protect. And if that means stayin’ out here while we take you apart piece by piece until you tell us what we want to know then, well, so be it.”

“Give you just a second to think about what my brother told you,” Joel said, pressing the tip of the knife to the man’s shoulder but not pushing it in. “And then you can answer now or you can answer later. Why are you here.”

The man closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep, shuddering breath before opening them again.

“There are too many of us,” he said. “Too many groups, been fighting over space for the past few years. Decided to work together for a time, find new territory to expand into. Sent us out here to see what might get in the way. Been tracking the territory of a settlement about a day’s walk from here, trying to see where we can push in and what they’ve got to push back…”

You stiffened, a chill running up your spine. Joel looked up to you, his eyes as concerned as you felt. He looked back at the man.

“How’s that been workin’?” Joel asked. “How are you tracking it?”

“We’ve been marking what we think the outside edges are,” he said. “We’ve been pushing in closer, last few months…”

“Who’re you workin’ with?” Joel asked.

“What?” The man asked, confused.

Joel sighed before pressing the knife into the man’s shoulder and he screamed.

“Don’t ask stupid questions,” Joel said. “The way you were talkin’ about my wife? I really wouldn’t mind taking my time and takin’ you apart. Who are you working with. Want names.”

“I don’t know!” He sobbed. “Swear I don’t, we run with a guy called Smith, he’s joined up with a couple other guys with groups like his, I don’t know their names…”

“Try and remember,” Joel growled, pressing the knife deeper. You winced and looked away, trying not think about Joel doing this before. Your stomach turned. “The name Mitchum ring a bell?”

“No,” the man said quickly. “Please, no, I promise I don’t know the names! Just that there are three or four of ‘em, that’s all.”

“How far out are the others you’re working with?” He asked. “They gonna be breathing down our necks any second?”

“No,” he said. “No, they’re a few days walk at least…”

Joel nodded before he reached out, brushing his fingers over the outside of your thigh, bringing your attention back to him.

“Any other questions?” He asked you. “Other names?”

“No,” you shook your head quickly. “Nothing else.”

Joel nodded, turning back to the man.

“Can’t let you live,” he said. “You’re a liability. You’re too hurt to get a message back to your people so there’s no point in risking it.”

“Fuck you,” the man spat and Joel shrugged.

“Shitty last words,” he said, pulling the knife from his shoulder before quickly slitting the man’s throat. He gasped and burbled on his own blood for a minute before he went still and quiet. Joel wiped his knife clean on the man’s shirt before sheathing it and getting to his feet. He looked to you then, his eyes wide and soft and deep.

“You with me?” He asked gently. You nodded quickly. He reached out, slowly, to take your face in his hands. His thumbs traced your cheekbones and his eyes looked into yours. “You’re OK? Not…”

“Yeah,” you said softly, cutting him off. “I’m OK.”

You weren’t sure how true that was. He pulled you against him, pressing his lips to your forehead before cradling you against him and holding you for a moment.

“Much as I’m happy you two have worked your shit out,” Tommy said. “We should get moving. Pretty sure he was tellin’ the truth but I don’t want to bet our lives on it.”

The three of you mounted up again, Gatling settling into her space on the front of your saddle.

“So,” Tommy said after you’d been riding for a bit. “Am I allowed to ask the obvious question?”

“Tommy,” Joel said, a warning on his voice.

“Look,” he replied. “Not tryin’ to hurt anyone or fuck up things between you two. But I’ve got a job to do when it comes to protecting my town and protecting my family and you two are a part of both of those things. Can’t defend from something I don’t know.”

“You don’t need -” Joel began but you cut him off.

“Mitchum was the man who held me captive for two years,” you said, staring straight ahead. Gatling gave a small whimper and you scratched her head. Tommy was quiet for what felt like a small eternity.

“He…” Tommy’s voice trailed off. “Two years?” You nodded, not able to look at him. “Two goddamn years?”

Your jaw tightened and your stomach turned.

“Two goddamn years and he ain’t dead yet?” Tommy asked, voice shifting to anger as he rounded on Joel. “The fuck have you been doing?”

“You think he’d still be breathin’ if I knew where to find him?” Joel snapped. “Ain’t that easy.”

“Should do to that fucker whatever he did to you,” Tommy said, ignoring Joel now. “Why haven’t you mentioned this before? We could’ve helped you, could’ve tried to track him down…”

“She don’t want to talk about it, Tommy,” Joel hissed. “Leave it.”

Gatling stretched up to give you a small lick on the chin.

“Joel’s right,” you said, finally making yourself look at the man who had become as much of a brother to you as the boys you’d grown up with had been. The pity in his eyes almost made you turn away. “I don’t want to talk about it. But you should know that he’s still after me. Joel and I ran into trouble on patrol before. One of the men then was one that… I knew him, from before. He said Mitchum is looking for me. He’s got a crew, at least 50 guys when I got out, and he’s looking for me.”

“Jesus,” Tommy shook his head for a moment before steeling himself. “He’s not gettin’ his hands on you. We’ll protect you, not going to let him hurt you, you understand me?”

“I know,” you said, looking straight ahead again. You tried not to think about what the man had just said. That there were groups of men like Mitchum, all bearing down on Jackson.

“Who all knows?” Tommy asked, calmer now. “About… what happened.”

“Joel,” you said, though that should have been obvious. “Ellie knows the broad strokes of it. Now you.”

“Not Savvy?” He asked, frown so evident in his voice that you looked over at him again. He looked sad and you tried not to resent him for it.

“Don’t need her having that shit in her head,” you said, looking forward again.

Tommy was silent for a few minutes.

“I’m really sorry, Bambi,” he said eventually. “You shouldn’t…”

“I don’t want your pity,” you said, harsher than you’d really meant to. “Just… forget I said anything.”

“But…”

“I said fucking forget it, Tommy.”

The rest of the ride back was quiet and you wanted to fix it. But, more than that, you wanted things to go back to how they’d been before. Where Tommy would give you shit and you’d give him shit back, not where he was going to pity you and handle you with kid gloves. You wanted him to keep being your brother, not someone who kept you at arm’s length because they kept picturing the shit that had happened to you.

Olivia was at the stable when the three of you made it back and you were almost disappointed that you wouldn’t be able to get lost in handling the horses on your own for a while. When she stepped to the side for a moment, you took a deep breath and turned to Tommy.

“I’m sorry I snapped at you,” you said, hoping that this would at least start to fix things. “I get that you need certain… information. I just don’t want you seeing me any different.”

“I don’t,” he gave you a sad half smile. “Just think you’re more badass now, that’s all.”

You scoffed but he waved you off.

“I mean it,” he said. “I do. And I’ll keep it to myself, alright?”

“Thank you,” you said and he pulled you in for a small hug.

“You might be Joel’s girl,” he said. “But you’re my sister. I’m gonna look out for you. No one’s allowed to fuck with you except me.”

You laughed a little at that, Tommy reminding you so much of Richie for a moment.

“I’ll go report out on this patrol,” he said, stepping back from you and looking to Joel. “We got some good information, it’ll help us be ready for whatever’s comin’ our way.”

Joel nodded, a concerned look on his face.

“We’ve weathered hard shit before,” Tommy said. “We can handle whatever these assholes have to throw at us. Took a lot to establish our territory here and I’m not afraid to shed a little blood to protect it.”

He set off and you, Joel and Olivia took care of everything else in near silence, Olivia just filling you in on the goings on while you were gone, seemingly unaware of any tension on the air.

“Should we go by the doctor?” You asked as you and Joel went to leave, your arms tight across your chest. “See if you need stitches or anything?”

“No,” he replied, draping an arm over your shoulders and tugging you closer to press a kiss to your temple. “It’s nothing too bad. Just want to get home.”

You just nodded and let him guide you home, walking in silence, the looming threat from the man Joel had questioned keeping your mind far away.

But when Joel opened the front door, you weren’t met with a quiet living room. Instead, Ellie and Savvy were sitting on the floor around the coffee table, Uno cards fanned out in their hands.

“Should never have told you how the draw cards work,” Ellie was muttering, her back to you and her already sizable hand growing as she drew from the deck in the middle of the table.

Savvy looked up as the door knob thudded into the wall, her eyes finding yours. Her face lit up like she was happy to see you - actually happy to see you.

“Mom!” She dropped her cards and jumped up. “You’re back!”

She ran over to you but stopped short of hugging you, looking you up and down before looking at Joel, too.

“Are you guys OK?” She asked, a little more reserved now, more how you were used to seeing her over the past few months. “Everyone made it through and stuff?”

“We’re fine,” you smiled, trying to actually be in the room with her instead of worrying about the threat of raiders on the horizon. It was easier, knowing that she actually wanted you there. “Is everything OK? What are you two doing here?”

“You were gone a little long,” she bit her lip and shoved her hands in her back pockets. “We just… we wanted to make sure you got home.”

You smiled, reaching out to tuck the stray curl that always popped out from her braids behind her ear. It was an automatic thing, a gesture you’d done countless times since she was a toddler. It didn’t occur to you until your fingers were almost brushing her skin that she might pull back from you now. But she didn’t. She let you touch her, adjusting her hair and cupping her cheek.

“Missed you,” you said quietly.

She smiled. It was tight, a little hesitant, but it was a smile.

“I missed you, too.”

Ellie had gone to the mess hall and brought back dinner for you and Joel and the two of you ate as Ellie and Savvy got Monopoly set up at the kitchen table. The four of you played a game, you paying more attention to explaining things like rents and mortgages and how they’d worked in the real world to Savvy. She crinkled her nose, the concept of money and paying to live inherently foreign to her. Joel kept a hand on your knee for most of it, his thumb tracing a gentle pattern there as you let Savvy clean you out, a small smile on your face every time you had to pay her.

“Well, some of us have to be up early tomorrow,” Ellie said, stretching, back arched like a cat after she won the game. “C’mon Savvy.”

“Yeah, alright,” Savvy yawned and tried to stifle it before getting to her feet.

“It was good to see you,” you said, crossing your arms to keep from reaching for her. “Thank you for staying a while.”

“Yeah,” she smiled, small but not as tight as it had been lately. “It was good to see you, too.”

She looked at you for a moment before hesitantly stepping closer. You lowered your arms and forced yourself to keep them at your sides until she reached for you, hugging you. You slowly, cautiously, hugged her back, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes as you held her close. She felt so foreign but so familiar all at once. You’d never had a chance to truly get used to holding her in the body she’d grown into in the years you were apart but she was still so her, smelling and moving the same as she always had.

You held onto her until she pulled away, her awkwardly staring down at your shoes before clearing her throat.

“Well…” she said. “Goodnight Mom. Joel.”

“Night,” Joel said, coming up alongside you, one of his large hands splaying wide over the small of your back.

“Goodnight,” you smiled a little, your voice wet.

Ellie gave you an encouraging look and followed Savvy out the back door and into the yard. You just stood there, watching them go, until they were inside the shed and the light turned on there.

“Hey,” Joel said quietly from beside you. You turned enough to look at him. He was watching you closely, frowning slightly. “How we doin’?”

You frowned.

“I’m fine,” you said. “Not really sure what you’re asking…”

“Well,” he looked off to the side for a moment before steeling himself and looking back to you with a heavy sigh. “Back when you first came back to me… You said you might need space sometimes. Today… There was a lot that happened, I had to do some shit that I’m sure ain’t easy to watch and… baby, if you need some distance from me…”

“Joel,” you said softly, twisting in his gentle hold so your front was pressed against his. You reached up and trailed your fingers through his curls.

“Want to give you whatever it is you need,” he said as your hands came to rest on his broad chest. He took your wrist gently in his palm and brought it to his lips pressing a kiss into your pulse point. “Even if that’s time away from me.”

“I don’t want that,” you said. “I just want to know you’re here.”

He pulled you a little closer, the hand that was on your wrist trailing down your arm before curling around your back.

“Why don’t we go get cleaned up,” he said, voice low, before leading you upstairs.

You undressed each other while the shower warmed up. You unbuttoned his shirt slowly, methodically, running your fingers over his bared chest before pressing your lips into him there. You examined the place on his arm where the bullet had grazed him, the cut already scabbing over.

“You got lucky,” you said, your fingers tracing over the older scars on his body before you kissed just below the new one.

“Been a lot luckier than I deserve for a while now,” he said quietly.

Once Joel undressed you, you took his hand and led him into the water. You cleaned him gently, lathering the soap in your hands before running them over his skin, cleaning the blood and dirt from his body and finding every mark on him that you’d gotten to know so well. He washed you in return, his large hands cupping your breasts, trailing over your stomach, your arms, cupping you between your legs with tender care. When you were both clean, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pressed your slick, wet body against his own. His cock - half hard and thick - nestled against your stomach.

“C’mon baby,” he said, tilting your head so he could look in your eyes while his nose brushed your own. “Let me take you to bed. Don’t want to rush this with you and don’t trust my bum leg to let me take my time in here.”

You smiled a little and kissed him.

“Promise you’ll take me to a lake this summer?” You asked. “Because I really want to fuck you in the water.”

He closed his eyes and laughed, low and needy.

“Promise, baby.”

You kissed him again.

“Then take me to bed.”

Joel reached behind you to turn off the water and wrapped you securely in a towel before running one quickly through his curls and over his own slick body. You enjoyed the view for a moment - the muscle of his arms and chest, the soft and welcoming swell of his stomach - before starting off toward the bedroom, dropping your towel halfway down the hall and looking back over your shoulder to catch your husband staring at you as you did.

It didn’t take him long to join you, his hands on your waist soon after you were in your bedroom, turning you to face him. His cock was fully hard as he kissed you, his lips hot and needy against you. You arched into his touch, the feeling of him against you, the taste of him on your tongue.

He pulled back from you just enough that you could look into his eyes, all molten hot and soft and open, his nose brushing yours, still breathing the same air.

“Tell me how to take care of you,” he said softly. “Tell me what you need.”

“Just you,” you said, voice breathy and trembling. “I need to feel you, I need you close.”

His mouth swallowed your words as he nudged you back down onto the bed. He arranged you in the middle of it, his skin never far from yours, before he settled in the cradle of your hips. His thick length pressed against your slit, making you moan as he kissed down your shoulder to your breast, taking the firm, pebbled part of you into his mouth and sucking you gently. You whimpered, grinding your hips against him. He kissed over your swell of flesh to your breast bone before looking up at you there, his gaze hot and desperate.

“Needy, are you?” He all but growled before pressing another kiss to your chest. “Don’t worry baby, I’ll take real good care of you. Just let me enjoy you first.”

He worked his way to your other breast, sucking you there while he cupped and gently toyed with the other one, his cock rocking against your core the whole time. You could feel your pussy starting to drip for him, your grasping entrance desperate for something to hold.

“Please Joel,” you panted, working your hips up against him as best you could with the weight of him holding you still. “I need you, please, please…”

He pulled his mouth from your nipple with a reluctant groan before adjusting his hips, your clit throbbing in protest of the loss of contact for a moment before you felt his head notch against your entrance. Joel hovered over you, the soft skin of his chest and stomach ghosting over yours, one of his hands coming to cradle the crown of your head, his thumb tracing tenderly along the peak of your hairline.

“What do you need?” He asked, sounding nearly breathless himself. “What’s my pretty, perfect wife need, hm?”

“You,” you whimpered. You didn’t really care if you sounded pathetic, you needed Joel too much. “Inside me, please, please…”

“Don’t worry baby,” he said. “Give you exactly what you need, always gonna take care of you.”

You felt him press into you then, his cock opening your tight channel as he sank into you. You closed your eyes and arched into the familiar, pleasant burn of the stretch of him followed by the almost shocking fullness when he was fully sheathed within you. He stilled there for a moment, your body adjusting to his size, and you could feel all of him. He was so close like this, closer than anyone else had ever been. Your body held onto his, your thighs around his hips, hands over his chest, pussy stretched taut over his cock. You could feel every breath he took, every throb of his cock within you. He was yours like this, yours and yours alone.

“This what you needed?” His voice trembled. You could only nod. He pulled back from you and you whimpered before he thrust back in with a grunt. “Good. Always give you what you need, baby, always.”

He fucked you hard and slow, his thrusts almost bruising in their force and making your hands leave his chest to twist and tangle in the blankets as your orgasm built. He set his aching rhythm, his tongue sweeping into your mouth and devouring all your needy, fucked out sounds.

Your whole being was drawn in tight and hot when he laced his fingers with yours, pinning your hand to the bed.

“C’mon baby,” Joel panted as he thrust into you deep and hard. “Let me feel you, just let go for me. You’re OK, you’re here with me, just give in. I’ve got you, baby. Take care of you, just give in, just come for me. Just come.”

You pressed your hips up against him and came, your fingers tightening around his as your pussy pulsed and throbbed and he fucked you through it.

Joel didn’t last long, though. Your climax had barely begun to ease when he pressed himself deep and came with a strangled cry. He kissed you as he finished before collapsing onto you for a moment, the heavy weight of him soothing and centering as you came back down to Earth.��

After a minute, he pulled himself gently from your fucked out body and lay beside you, still panting for breath as he watched you next to him. You rolled to face him and pressed yourself close, burying your face in his chest that smelled like soap from the shower with a hint of sweat from what happened after. His hand brushed over your hair and down your back in a gentle, easy cadence. He pressed a kiss into the crown of your head and you felt him take a deep breath, his nose nuzzled into your hair.

“You with me?” He asked softly. You nodded into his chest. “How’re you feelin’?”

“After that?” You teased lightly. “I’m great.”

He chuckled.

“Not what I meant, love.”

You took a deep breath, taking the centering scent of Joel into yourself.

“I don’t know,” you said quietly. “I guess I just… I kept thinking raiders were far away from here. Sure, they were out there, we ran into them sometimes, but they weren’t a problem. Not really. But they’re not, they’re right there and I…” your voice cracked and he pulled you tighter.

“I know, sweetheart,” he whispered. “M’sorry.”

“Savvy’s here now,” you said, trying to keep yourself from crying. “Ellie… she goes out there. And now you do, too, and… I know I sound like a goddamn broken record but I cannot survive losing any of you. I can’t. And they just take, they take and take and they won’t stop until there’s nothing left and…”

You buried your face in his chest, not able to keep going.

“It won’t be like that this time,” he whispered. “You’re not doing this alone. I’ve got you and anyone who wants to even glance at you or our girls will have to go through me. And good luck keepin’ me from coming home to you.”

You laughed once at that, the sound thick and wet.

“I’m going to protect you, Bambi,” he said, his tone serious now. “I promise you. I’ll keep you safe. I’ll keep us all safe.”

Next Chapter

A/N: I dunno guys, I feel like something might be about to happen.

Could just be me, though.

👀👀👀👀

Thank you, as always, for reading. I really can't say how much it means to me that you're here, that you're so kind and supportive, that you choose to spend your time with this story. I appreciate it so much.

Love you!

Taglist: @ashleymsnodgrass@planet-marz1@kalea-bane @juneswonderlust@ilovepedro @h-annahayy @starstruckmusiciansartghost@beccerjune@mumma-moonchild@netonetoneto@mellymbee@purplelye@n7cje@flugazi@evyiione@randomhoex@aliengirl99@orcasoul@reds-ramblings@pedropascalsbbg @fupoola @tinypotatothing @knopes-waffles @lilmizmoz @ayamenimthiriel@jenispunk@panda-pascal@sarap-77@flugazi@your-slutty-gf@daniegraceg@partyofone3413@cumberpegg@noisynightmarepoetry.@fifia-writes@grumpygrumperton @srmacaroni @txlady37 @bigboiseason123@ashleyfilm

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #yearling #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x oc #smut fic

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jaazzpur · 4 months

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Morningstar family redesigns

I kinda wanted to expand on my choices for my redesigns for fun

So first, Lucifer. I really don’t have a lot of issues with his original design, I think it’s fun and fits within the Hazbin universe! I just wanted to reimagine him.

I always liked the idea of Lucifer having curly reddish hair, something about his fall turning his hair red (this design isn’t 100% biblically accurate as it is just for fun), but I toned down the red to be closer to his original blonde since I also like blonde Lucifer, and I figured he’d liked to keep his hair neat so I decided to put it up and take away the hat

I wanted to keep the ring leader theme in his outfit, but I wanted to further incorporate the snake element in his design since I think he’d be proud of his fall (hence why his suit looks burnt and torn, and he shows off his burnt arm, I figured he’d do this intentionally to remind others of his rebellion)

Lastly I changed the entire family’s main colors to purple, as biblically out of the 7 sins Pride is purple and since he’s supposed to rule pride in the show I figured he’d be more purple themed then red, pretty simple🙏

Next Lilith, I think she was the only one out of the three where I didn’t really like her original design. Not only because she didn’t have much going on, but she also looked really similar to Lucifer, to the point where they almost look blood related.

I think Viv’s choices for Lilith were a bit odd, as she had SOO much potential that just wasn’t used.

I kept her blonde hair but I gave it some tan undertones and I put it up into a semi-low slicked back pompadour inspired by some hairstyles you might see young women have in the early 1900s or late 1800s, but I gave her a little down section that fades into a dark purple and looks somewhat feathery due to one adaption of her describing her as a “screech owl”. I kept the purple theme somewhat like the original and plus she technically rules over pride as well, I would have loved to have given her a red theme if pride was red.

Based on these different adaptations of Lilith a took inspiration from each, giving her a flame-themed dress and the upper body of a beautiful women yet still somewhat demon-like, I also put some fluff at the bottom of her dress since I thought it looked kinda like smoke puffs and clouds. Her stomach is covered with gold rings that look somewhat like a snake belly, and I gave her a necklace with a style inspired by some eastern jewelry, the jewels on her necklace are each the color of one of the 7 sins which I thought would be a fun touch and a little bit of a “showing off” of her role as the queen of hell.

lastly I kept her horns since she is meant to be a succubus, but I stylized them a bit to look less like those big ram-like ones since I didn’t really like how odd they looked against her head. I also gave her long slender fingers that faded to a black naturally as in biblical lore she steals babies from mothers and I thought making her hands that she stole the children with look creepy and eerie yet still beautiful was a nice touch.

Lastly, Charlie! Again, I didn’t really have a problem with the original design. I changed her suit color and theme to prides color, put I made her hair curlier and more red/orange like her dads, and I wanted some parts of her suit to resemble his a bit hence the buttons and the back of her suit going out like her dad’s (but a bit shorter for convenience.)

I imagine her being a bit showy so I kinda decked her out in silver, I thought it’d also be a fun mirroring of how her mom is covered in gold. Her shoes are pretty similar to the original, I put a little split at the front of the shoes in the dark purple since Viv has said she has little hooves which I’m not sure is true but I thought it was a fun idea so I kinda hinted at it with that

I changed her irises (is that what they’re called?) to look more snake-like like her dad, and I gave her little horns since I thought they were cute and I wanted her to maybe show them on purpose because she wanted to blend in more with the citizens of hell so they might feel less intimidated by her presence as the princess, that’s also why I didn’t give her a crown :]

Overall this was just a fun little project I did out of curiosity and boredom, these designs aren’t made to criticize or taunt vivziepop since like I said I love her designs already

#art #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel redesign #digital art #purple #charlie morningstar #lucifer morningstar #lilith morningstar #helluva boss #vivziepop

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sapphicseasapphire · 2 months

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Miscellaneous Cryptid au lore bits that are too short/too specific to make it into individual posts!

If you want more information about any of these, feel free to ask! I’m always willing to ramble about my Little Guys haha!

(In no particular order)

• Sky’s wings are too big to fit through doors. He will 100% for sure run into people in a crowded street. Because of this, he stays behind when the others go to villages. This gets incredibly lonely for our friendly little bird boy so eventually it’s decided that someone has to stay with him. This leads to one on one bonding between Sky and everyone in the Chain! (Except Time)

• Four can control water, earth, fire, and air, but not particularly well. Jack of all trades is a master of none. That being said, each individual color is a master of their element, so when separated, they are a FORCE to be reconned with. Their diminished power as a whole is a huge source of frustration for them, but I can’t let them be too powerful.

• After the their adventure is over, Time lives out the rest of what would have been his mortal life with Malon, then he takes care of his children, and his children’s children. But eventually he’s just… lived too long. His humanity falls away and he becomes more and more of a God and stops interacting with mortals almost entirely. Except when the other Links are born in their own eras, Time looks after them Father Time style and if they fall, he rewinds to before they were injured (their last “save point”) and pushes them to a better path. (Game over. Continue?)

• Even if someone is born with the blood of a God, their powers need to be awakened. This usually happens in a moment of desperation. For example, during Time’s adventures, he meddled with the flow of time so much that it became his dominion. Twilight’s powers awakened when he was like two years old. His parents had been killed by monsters- monsters that were now looking for him. And in his desperation, he looked to a squirrel in the tree above and he copied it. The monsters lost track of him, ignoring the animals of the forest. Time was gifted, well… time… because against a falling moon, it was his last hope. Twilight was gifted shape shifting because he had no other chance of survival.

^ Hylia doesn’t count because she was one of the original Goddesses. Many of the Zeldas, while they do possess the blood of the Goddess, have not had their awakening. Yet.

• Warriors will sometimes blurt out random sets of data without being prompted. He’ll ask to run calculations on things that no one has ever asked him to. And while the others might find this confusing, it’s his way of expressing his interests. Of learning more about the things that he likes, of telling people about the things that he likes. This happens rarely, but when it does, Sky drops EVERYTHING to talk with him, so excited to see him opening up.

• The Legend of the Godkiller is a very idealized and not very accurate retelling of Sky’s final battle against Demise. It paints him as a very confident, willing knight of the Goddess. Full of righteous anger and absolutely thrumming with power. In the story that Time knows, Sky wasn’t even scared. He knew he was capable of killing Demise, and he wasn’t even surprised when he was cursed. This is… far from the truth.

• Yeah, Time knows about Sky’s curse. But what’s he gonna do? Confront him about it? Tell the others? And risk drawing the wrath of the Godkiller? Absolutely not.

• Wild is more sentient than he lets on. He understands more than the others might think. He’s a little chaos gremlin who gets so easily distracted and acts more like a wild animal than a person, but he’s very smart. He couldn’t do long division but he can tell that… something’s not right with Sky and the Master Sword. The others haven’t caught on yet.

• Wild KNOWS THINGS. That he SHOULDN’T.

• Hyrule is so incredibly timid by nature. He’s used to being hunted: first as a fairy, sought for his healing magic, and then because of his blood curse, sought by monsters to bring about the revival of Ganon. Because of this, he’s incredibly shy. Until one of his companions gets hurt!! Then he’s ALL BUSINESS and he speaks with the authority that one might expect from a fairy so powerful.

• Speaking of that! At first, no one knew he was a fairy! He was afraid that they’d bottle him (they had other bottled fairies in their pouches when he’d first met the others, so it was justified). He kept up his glamour until he physically couldn’t anymore. The others knew he was a magic user- he tended to fight less with a sword and more with his spells and had an affinity for healing, but they didn’t know JUST how powerful he was until his glamour fell apart.

• Hyrule’s glamour can change the way that people see things, but it cannot change the physical shape of something. (Except himself, because his body is mostly magic anyway). For example, he could hide Four’s horns, but if you were to touch the top of Four’s head, you’d still feel them! He can make Wild look like a Hylian, but that doesn’t make their antennae go away. This is why Sky can’t go into towns: his wings may be invisible, but they’re still there, they can still feel pain and can still bump into people and walls. So… he can’t fit, unfortunately.

• The best swimmer (aside from Legend, Ravio, and Wind) is Sky. Which is weird, right? One might think that those massive wings would slow him down. But he has the Water Dragon’s Scale! Everyone’s so surprised when he starts racing people and WINNING. When he jumps out of the water in a spiral spin. Legend can call him a cheater all he wants, but he’ll be a hypocrite for it. He can’t say anything about using magic items to bolster abilities.

• Legend and Wind go from enemies to best friends in the course of like a month. They bond over a war and the ocean, and their connection is strengthened by the conflict that they’re both familiar with. Honestly a big reason that Legend warms up to Wind is that Ravio is fond of him. Also it’s actually impossible to hate Wind. Also he went to Outset that one time and was ablel to better understand Wind’s perspective.

• Wind dies a little bit inside every time Aryll or his grandma call themselves a Sea Monster. But he doesn’t have the heart to correct them.

• Ravio was never really afraid of Wind himself. More so… afraid of the monster that he had the potential to be (Ku). When Wind was never corrupted, Ravio had no reason to hate him! So they became friends during the War of Eras.

• Ravio joins the Chain very late. But we love him anyway.

• Twilight has little nicknames for everyone. If he calls them by their actual name/their title, they’re in trouble.

• Four only splits around Sky, Warriors, Hyrule and Twilight at first. Actually, the first person they split in front of was Sky but that was an accident. Once they determine that it’s safe, they start doing it around the others… slowly but surely…

• Post God Reveal, Legend and Four join Sky in the “distrust Time” corner

• Time wields Wars’ sword because Wars has deemed him the most powerful. Because of this, Warriors will go with Time when their adventure comes to an end. (This way, neither of them have to face eternity alone).

• I know I made a whole big long post about what happens to Mer if they don’t soak, but I neglected to say that all that will happen to Aquili too, just to a lesser extent. Wind needs to soak as well, just not as often as Legend and Ravio do.

• Mer cannot assume their natural form if they have anything on their legs/feet where their tail would go. Ravio’s… not wearing anything under his robes. And Legend… isn’t wearing anything under his skirt. Being barefoot definitely isn’t ideal but it’s better than the alternative: being unable to soak and drying out. Now, they could simply remove their shoes/pants, but they’re traveling and often in battle and they don’t always have the time to shed their clothes. If they need to jump into the water? They jump into the water.

• During Legend’s adventures, him being Mer was a secret. (The Zora were already antagonistic- imagine what they’d do if they knew he was a war mongering Mer!) This is why he needed flippers or a magic item to be able to swim- something on his feet or something magically imbued to keep him from transforming.

• For Sky, Link and Aepon are generally completely fused, but there are certain events that can force an imbalance between their influence over him. For example, if he’s hurt and takes a heart potion for healing, the body is healed, his Link half is healed, but is Aepon half is still weakened. The others might notice that he acts differently after taking a potion and he just seems very… unwell. Distressed, panicked. But also, he has both Aepon dreams and Link dreams. And depending on their frequency and severity, they can affect how he acts when he wakes, at least until both halves are sufficiently awake.

• When Sky’s Aepon half is more dominant, he is actually legitimately a bird. He doesn’t speak, he just chirps and squawks and trills like a bird. He looses all sense of personal space. And he’ll LOOSE IT if his feathers are touched.

• Sky can’t see well at night but he has a much greater endurance for looking at bright things.

• Hyrule hangs out around Sky as much as he can because Sky can’t take heart potions and also his bones are literally hollow and can break a lot easier than the others’

• Hyrule is a GIFT to this world and I don’t draw him enough.

I have a LOT MORE to say about these guys but this is just off the top of my head right now. Also I don’t want to spoil story elements! But let me know if you have any questions or want more context! I have short stories written about like half of these.

#the legend of zelda #chain as cryptids au #cryptid lore #cryptid ravio #cryptid twilight #cryptid wind #cryptid warriors #cryptid sky #cryptid time #cryptid wild #cryptid four #cryptid legend #links meet au

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krypticcafe · 3 months

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How do you feel about CoD boys in a monster au? Whether they’re the monster or their s/o is the monster, I just think it would be neat. I’m partial towards werewolves but honestly I love anything that goes bump in the night. I LOVE the idea of a monster being afraid of hurting their partner but their partner knows that they could never hurt them. If you’re open to monster requests, I have so many ideas. Just… monsters, man

oooo are we spitballing bc I love throwing around ideas!!

I absolutely love monster AUs, one of my faves is @/bluegiragi's and I'm sure you all know that iconic one. I'm totally open to monster/hybrid requests, and a detailed list of what other things I write can be found in the cafe's Customer Service Policy aka rules :]

And monster-related plots? I'm a sucker for that shit, need more of that and monster!reader.

If I were to make a Monster Hybrid AU with my own specific ideas though, hmm...

Powerful and stoic, Price would make a great minotaur (lower half of a bull). Sure, maybe his back isn't what it used to be, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have the strength to send you back to your maker. Every step he takes on base acknowledges his presence, a posture that demands respect from its witnesses. The horns on his head aren't something to mess with either, though it takes him ages to scrape out the dried blood from the cracks and tailor his bucket hats.

On the other hand, the canine hybrid for Soap is oddly charming. Similarly to a werewolf, he would have the senses of one, but as a just hybrid, he's unable to fully transform. Instead, he's equipped with features like ears, tail, fangs, some fur on his arms and legs, and a longer tongue. I can see him being a border collie, the Scottish sheepdog just makes sense. But a kelpie/merfolk would also work with his callsign. Soap, a mischievous water spirit known for "cleaning out" rooms of enemies? A body with slick scales, gills, and a frilled mohawk when in monster form? Yeah, I can definitely see that.

For someone with a Queen's honor, a phoenix feels right for Gaz. Bright and burning wings and tail—a light that feels regal and elegant, yet so youthful and lively at the same time. With him in the sky, you're guaranteed to be safe under his watch. Or maybe a cervitaur with those doe eyes of his, gorgeous as ever. Yet equipped with a kick that's sure to shatter the ribs of those who mock him for being just a faun with a pretty face.

Undeniably, with such a specific callsign, Ghost can't be anything other than a wraith. Maybe mix in a bit of demonic blood, soul-eater tendencies, or even marks of an incubus for a little extra kick. His scars look more like shadowy cracks in his skin, smoke pours from the concerningly realistic skull he wears, he looks more like a reaper than a spirit. Regardless, this man is a shadowy phantom that provokes the fear of gods in whoever he sets his target as.

Roach, sure maybe his energy is fitting of a satyr or something more fitting and urban for our token American, like a roach version of Mothman. Bug wings and scales similar to the structure of an exoskeleton, But Roach came to be for being nearly indestructible, like the bug. In fact, it would be more accurate to call Roach, Roaches, as a bogeyman with a human body that can crumble into a swarm of those insects would explain why gunshots and explosions can hardly stop him.

Like Ghost, we can't deny who Hound is, either. Werewolf. Anything less would be criminal. For fun, mix it in with a bit of hellhound hybrid biology, so that he has to either go as a full hellhound or a human with hellhound features. Eyes that burn like Tartarus and a fanged snarl that even Cerberus would shudder at. Maybe even make him in charge of a hellhound K-9 unit, forced to face the very thing he fears.

As for the Reader? Well, that's up to you. Personally, I'm a little fond of shapeshifters. Might need to draw some of these ideas sometime...

Ah well, just some thoughts I had. Any other spitballs you guys have?

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multifandomthoughts · 20 days

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Spy, Sniper and Medic with a southern reader

Author’s Note: big thanks to @deathsimage for help with some of these, as they are southern themselves and were able to give me a perspective on what it’s like in the south!

Spy

First of all, all three of the mercs absolutely adore your accent. They think it’s adorable and fits you very well. Spy might have a harder time deciphering some of the idioms or phrases you use than others, however.

Finds your stories of you playing in the dirt catching frogs adorable. However, the thought of him doing that makes him grimace and shudder. Too messy for him. When and if he trusts you enough, he’ll tell you about his own childhood, which will different, still entails shenanigans.

Can’t help but laugh every time you get mad, as your yelling becomes a jumbled mess to him. He shakes his head as you scream phrases like “What in tarnation, I damn near broke my neck!”

In response to you teaching him southern phrases, he teaches you some easy French phrases. You do your best to incorporate them into your vocabulary, and when Spy hears this, he melts internally.

Sniper

Is super enthusiastic about you being from the south and doing all sorts of outdoorsy things as a kid. It means that you wouldn’t be opposed to doing outdoorsy things like camping or catching fish with him.

Tells you about his own childhood, and it’s a bit similar to yours. You bond over shared experiences and memories. Sniper has definitely had a lot of experiences with Snakes, so hearing you wrangled them as a kid impresses him.

You and him have very similar accents so you exchange some idioms with him. You laugh at all the different silly phrases you learn from each other.

You imitate each others accents every so often, bursting into laughter when it sounds particularly accurate. It’s all in good fun and you always make sure that it’s seen as such.

Medic

Is immediately interested in how much time you spent outside as a kid, and wants to do experiments determining if it had any impact on your immunity.

Wrong pronunciation? Wrong pronunciation. He feels comfortable around you because some of the words you say sound different due to your accent, and he’s aware that his accent can do the same.

He also thinks it’s adorable that when you get mad that your accent comes out, just like his does. You giggle at him when this happens, and he does the same for you.

For funsies, he teaches you German words that do not have any direct translation into English, like Backpfeifengesicht (face that begs to be slapped) or Dreikäsehoch (three cheeses high, measurement) so that you two can exchange insults towards the others without being caught.

#tf2 medic x reader #tf2 sniper x reader #tf2 x reader #tf2 medic #tf2 spy #tf2 #team fortress 2 x reader #team fortress 2 #tf2 spy x reader #spy x reader #sniper x reader #medic x reader

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factual-fantasy · 22 days

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18 Asks! Thank you!! :}} 🎪

@pink088

Guuuuurl does it look like I missed the boops? XDD

(I DID miss the super boops and revenge boops tho. I was trashed on the couch and stuck on mobile all day so I wasn't able to send any back to anyone💔💔)

Uhhhmm... oh jeez lemme try to remember-- I'm assuming you mean the order I got everyone in the game..?? Cuz other than the goofy little comics I've been drawing there isn't much of a story beyond that-

Uhhh so I started with Midori(Sprigatito) obviously, thennn... I think I caught Grim(Gastly).. then I caught Gloria(Ralts). Thenn..... arrhrhhgh I thiiiink I went looking for eevees, but I found Anastasia(Shiny Kricketot) in the process and kept her. Then I picked one of the eevees I caught at random and kept him. Then lastly I found a Mareep(Bonnie) by surprise and kept her.

My memory is very poor but I thiiink that's mostly accurate <XDD If I misunderstood your question don't be afraid to send another ask! 😅

@pbjfox37147878

Sorry, I don't take requests.. But hey! You already got a solid concept going and some artistic talent, you can always make it yourself for free! :0

Not really.. I've had a surprising number of uncomfortable experiences with the fandom recently so I've decided to take a step back from Octonauts for a while..

@psype

:DD Thank you! I'm glad you like them! :}}

And yeah that's how I pictured her XDD its becuase I use her the most out of all my Pokémon-

Now she's not bossy and doesn't have a leader or "I'm better that you guys" complex, none of that! She's just very intelligent and usually very level headed and calm. I can imagine that she's gotten the team safely through a lot of complicated situations and her plans/advice have rarely led the group astray.

Plus since I use her so often, I like to think that she's one of the most powerful Pokémon on the team. If not the most powerful. So whenever the group was met with a great danger, Gloria was probably the one to rescue them <XD

So the whole group kind'a gravitates behind her and lets/wants her to take the lead most of the time. Especially when things get complicated or dangerous!

@nerdyskullcap (User in ask)

I took a peek at their blog, but I couldn't find any original art of the Conductor after quite a while of scrolling through that tag.. I only found reblogs of other peoples Conductor comics.. <:(

XD That description of Gloria is very fitting! I use her the most out of all my Pokémon and she rarely loses! XDD

This was a cool read, and hey! Some of my Pokémon have some of those attacks! :000 Gloria has draining kiss and Bonnie has discharge! :D

@cat7890

I'd like to think they've never fought before.. maybe some little bickering on a bad day, but never anything serious.

They have good communication and just generally get along really well and like a lot of the same things. So there's rarely conflict between them! :0

Thank you! I'm happy to hear that you like my artwork! :}}

As for your question.. I'm afraid I don't understand/cant explain it--

Lets say I wanna draw Mario. I imagine what the drawing might end up looking like in my head, what pose I'll draw him in and what colors I'll use.. And then I just.. draw it. It might not look exactly like what I pictured but its probably close enough.

If that doesn't answer your question, I'm afraid I either don't understand your question or this is just an art thing that I don't know how to explain. <:( Sorry, feel free to send another ask with more specifics if you have them!

@sleep-deprived-fr3ak

If Bill ever became a lawyer? All hope is lost XDD

@raven-bearden-the-interviewer42

I haven't really thought about the details of the crews travels and adventures.. but I'm sure that when Louis got cursed and became a crab monster? That was probably pretty memorable XD

Probably this one honestly <XD I cant think of anything more cursed off the top of my head-

@fawncr33k

I suppose that would be fine, but I wouldn't prefer it. As I've said many times,, just comments guys! Asks, reblogs, tags, how ever you type them. I just want comments.👍

@neo-metalscottic

No problem! Getting asks are usually a pick me up :}}

As for the Dry Bones thing, that's what I meant by "not sure how it fits into the AU yet" 😅 Who'd they fight? Why did they fight? When did this happen? No idea. Its all just a neat concept with no structure yet :// And beyond the awkward living situation with the Dry Bones today, I haven't really thought about how the Koopa culture has been changed by the war. That's just way too much thinking and I'm way too sick to bother trying to figure it out atm- 💀💔 But maybe someday I'll think it through!

Now Luigi, I had this idea that he had a bizarre encounter with a 1-UP and was later bitten by a Goomba. Over the span of say... 5 days or so..? Luigi slowly got weaker and weaker until eventually he became bedridden and actually died- He came back to life moments after but it still completely shook Mario and Luigi's worlds for a sec there-

I had intended to draw a comic about this, and I made a sketch about it in the past.. but around the time I thought of this idea my Mario phase was kind'a passing over so I didn't feel like making it- <XDD

As for a potential sequel, I would like to see Wario, Waluigi and Toadsworth. Not sure why Toadsworth wasn't in the first movie- he absolutely should have been. That deep voiced purple..? council..? toad guy?? Totally should have been Toadsworth :/

And my request for the Wario bros is that they are taken seriously. 😅🤣

@cherrycreamfairy

I'm doing okay so far today, thank you! :}

@littlelightfish

I haven't really figured out the details about how Tuna and Louis lost their limbs- 😅

But I'm considering that Louis lost his arm (I assume you meant his arm-) in some kind of work related accident a long time ago. It must have been a fishing accident somehow..

As for Tuna, either some kind of natural disaster/accident or.. someone "removed" them... O-O

I do not :/ I'm not even sure what homestuck is.. I thiiink its a webcomic-

@nemo-draco

Oooo! :00 It looks cool! :DD

And thank you, I'm hoping I get over this soon too 😅

#my response #cookie run #cookie run kingdom #cookie run ocs #my ocs #super mario bros #mario movie #pokemon scarlet and violet

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hades-in-bloom · 4 months

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The Bigger Person

Spawn!Astarion Ancunin x Redeemed Dark Urge!Reader

summary: after saving Baldur’s Gate, Astarion and his partner descend into the Underdark to take care of Cazador’s misdeeds. All seven thousands of them. Was it something the elf truly wanted to do with his freedom?

spoilers for Act 3/Pale Elf and Epilogue

warnings & contents: teethy fluff; established relationship; comfort, sass, and class; hints of existential crisis; the reader could be any gender; mentions of trauma; some hugs; assumed drow or half-drow background of the reader but could be any race

a/n: I am kinda terrified of writing for Astarion as I respect Larian’s work SO MUCH (so Larian, please forgive me, if I ever do this goofy dagger-happy love wrong). This blurb came out of nowhere as I was bored during my long ass flight. As always, proceed at your own risk. Minors DNI! Masterlist xoxo

soundtrack: miley cyrus — used to be young

***

You watched Astarion from afar as elf was basking in the azure light of a Sussur tree. His pale skin glowing, eyes half-lidded—one of, if not the most beautiful sight you’ve seen in your entire life. Radiance of a Sussur flower might have been the closest thing to the sunlight the vampire spawn had now, after the ever-protecting tadpole was gone.

It was barely a couple of weeks since the Netherbrain crushed into the Chionthar. The exhausting journey was finally over. Your thoughts for a moment went to Gale—how was he fairing now, taking into account his condition? And what any of you was supposed to do with your lives now, after saving the world?

You shook off your guessings by and by—only to notice that it was Astarion’s turn to stare at you. His smooth lips curved into a mischievous grin.

“My once murderous little love, what were you daydreaming of?” The man wondered as he stepped towards you, stretching out a hand for you to touch, inviting you to feel the soothing coldness of his forever-young skin. The elf tilted his head a bit, curiously; studying you.

“You seemed… far from here.” Although his tone was lighthearted, you could see concern in the wandering gaze of garnet eyes. After all these weeks traveling—and now living— together, you could read him quite well.

“It’s nothing,” you mumbled before coming to your senses; a gentle, slightly teasing smile appearing on your face. “I was stalking you, actually. You fit quite well with the Underdark, you know.”

Astarion didn’t seem to object your observations.

Obviously.

“Well,” he gestured abstractly, pretending not to care, although he cared quite a bit. “You don’t say, my sweet. Although I'd assume that my features should look aesthetically pleasing in most of the attention worthy places.”

You couldn’t keep a straight face as you laughed, enjoying his lazy attempts to hide a proud smile.

“Behave, Astarion. There are kids in the close vicinity, after all.”

The man changed in the face and let out a soft groan. “Seven thousand of them,” he muttered with slight annoyance in his voice.

Despite grimaces Astarion made regularly, you could see him enjoying it—taking care of the murderous horde of vampire spawns to whom the elf showed mercy in the palace. He was their mentor, their leader now—a counterpart to what Cazador was, the monster that created them all. Now so much better than him.

“I blame you,” Astarion continued in the meantime, playfully pointing a finger in your direction. “That’s all your nasty influence. Be the bigger person, dear!..” he passionately—and painfully accurately—mimicked your tone of voice while saying the last piece. You, though, weren’t offended in the slightest. You liked him even more when he dared to show the silly side of his complex, wounded personality.

You felt his hand crawling around your waist as he huffed next to your ear shortly after. “Why should I be a bigger person, darling, when I can be happy and petty?”

You snorted. “I don’t think you’re holding back on pettiness, love.”

His smile stretched across the skin of your neck in a silent, although eloquent enough reply. None of you said a thing for quite a while, staying motionless close to each other with heads buried deep into your own thoughts.

“Thank you.” You blurted out eventually.

Astarion shifted, looking into your face with his eyebrow raised. He was visibly confused.

“Thank you for choosing this. Choosing them.” you continued as you met his gaze with yours. “Instead of your… freedom.” You struggled to find a better word for that.

Astarion didn’t seem to be convinced; didn’t seem to follow at first. “I’m free,” he replied gravely. “The bastard is dead.”

You shook your head slightly. “You could’ve been anywhere. Doing anything,” you retorted with care. “But you’re here instead.”

His facial features softened as he understood why you were saying what you were saying. There was a pinch of truth in your words—he spent some time thinking about it, too, after you’ve both descended into the Underdark and began building this fort; the safe harbor for Cazador’s cursed—as although perpetually hungry vampire spawns now, these people deserved to have a place to call home, no matter how dangerous or uncivilised per human standards it was.

You heard Astarion letting out a reluctant sigh as he came to terms with his own decision once more.

“This was the right thing to do.” The elf concluded at once.

Mild aversion to his own heroism that manifested itself in his whole appearance in that particular moment made you giggle suddenly.

“My, my. Who thought you'd be up for doing The Right Thing the first time we met.”

The elf gave you a friendly, tad fiendish stare as he rolled his eyes, and you scoffed as he spoke. “Not that you were a paragon of virtuousness back then either, being your daddy’s scion.” You made an unamused face that made him smile.

Astarion reassured you then with playful seriousness, letting his lips and teeth slide affectionately to your neck. “Don’t keep your hopes up, darling. Now my quota of the rightful deeds is fulfilled for the upcoming century.”

You smirked as you locked him into a hug, not believing a single word of what that man just said as you felt him hugging you back.

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softlyspector · 7 months

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Joel Miller birth chart analysis (Happy Birthday, king, sorry the universe, like, kinda hates you)

So, to start, game!Joel and show!Joel have two (slightly) different birth charts because they were born in different years and different cities. I think they were born in different cities, anyway, it's kind of unclear where show!Joel was born, but the city doesn't change the chart that much, and not with the big three. So, this will be broken down accordingly.

Speaking of the big three! That's what I'll be looking at today is Joel's sun, moon, and rising sign. Both show and game Joel have the same sun and rising signs, but different moon signs, which is interesting. Their moon signs definitely rang the most true to me, oddly enough.

We'll talk about sun and rising first, since game and show Joel have the same signs for those aspects, and then we'll talk about the moon, where they differ.

I also want to talk about their Lilith signs, which reveals darker, deeper natures.

Joel Miller's sun sign: Libra.

The sun sign represents our identity and our sense of self. Libra is an air sign (intellectual, social, usually good at communicating) and a cardinal sign (leaders, like to be in charge).

Libra is a sign of balance. They value peace, but in a way that always pits them in the middle ground, which leads to them trying to please everyone in every way. They are very sociable, innocent and approachable. They are incredibly fair. Libra men are often overly concerned with their appearance and aesthetics.

You might be saying, well, Becca that doesn't sound very much like Joel. And you'd be right, it doesn't. It doesn't sound like the Joel we know in the game or the show. We have to look at other aspects of his chart to find out what about this actually makes Joel himself.

Game!Joel as a Libra in conjunction with other traits:

Joel's Saturn is in Libra as well, which means he rarely takes uneducated risks and accepts responsibility naturally and easily. He's grounded and levelheaded and responsible. He's loyal to people he cares about.

Joel's Lilith is in Sagittarius and in conjunction with the Libra sun placement. He's comfortable with his darker side. It also means he's incredibly observant and clear headed.

Show!Joel as a Libra in conjunction with other traits:

Unlike game!Joel, show!Joel's Saturn is in Aries and in opposition to his Libra placement. He is cautious and strategy minded. He is self-sensoring, often thinking of what he shouldn't do, and parenting minded. Self aware and self sabotaging.

Joel is also in opposition to his Cancer moon. It makes him strong willed but sensitive. He feels a constant pull between wants and needs. This means sometimes his public and private personalities differ.

Joel Miller's rising sign: Sagittarius.

We won't need to break this one down into two Joels. The rising sign, or ascendant, is how you present yourself to the world. Even in conjunction with his moon and sun signs, I really don't feel this one fits Joel too well. This sign changed every few hours though, and since we don't have a precise time of birth for either of them, its hard to say if this one is accurate.

Looking at some of the other houses might tell us more, but those with this sign have an underlying faith in the world around them, hope, and a sprit for life. They can be restless, and feel as though they're always searching for something.

Joel Miller's moon sign: Virgo and Cancer:

Here we have to break it down, since they have two different moon signs. The moon sign represents the inner self, how you view yourself.

Game!Joel's moon in Virgo:

Joel likes to feel useful and needed. He finds security in the little things in life. For most that this would mean, buying groceries, paying bills on time, taking care of everyday tasks. For someone in the post-apocalypse, this probably looks like being able to provide for people he cares about, to make sure everyone is safe. People with this placement are content to live a 'regular' life. They do very well with routine. They do best when they have something to take care of, usually a job or a hobby, but I think for Joel this would be taking care of his family.

He is skeptical and does not have blind faith in anything. He is practical when showing affection and can be shy in love, but kind. Very self critical, but humble and calm, typically reserved.

Show!Joel's moon in Cancer:

This sign clings. He clings to his home, his things, the people he cares about. He seeks security and peace in the people he cares about, and does not like change. He is devoted and forms strong connections to his past. He dwells on hurts that other people have long ago let go.

He seeks warmth and security and can be waspish when he doesn't receive these things. He is dependable, and a caretaker, to his friends and loved ones. Devoted and nurturing, he likes home, comfort, routine. He is very caring and protective, but can become dependent. Moody often, but funny. Sometimes known to act irrationally, especially when he feels insecure. Accommodating, but seeks understanding.

Joel Miller's Lilith sign: Sagittarius and Taurus

Lilith represents deeper, darker natures that might be buried.

Game!Joel's Lilith sign in Sagittarius:

Often feels ashamed or uncomfortable with his curiosity and need to seek out meaning. He questions constantly and feels bad for it, for challenging facts and beliefs, and that his convictions can be taken to extremes.

Show!Joel's Lilith sign in Taurus:

Has a hard time feeling fully satisfied. He is always wanting. He fears indulging those wants. When he thinks he might lose something, he can become possessive. But understanding the he is allowed to want and have is incredibly hard.

Yeehaw! Happy Birthday, Joel Miller! I love you very, very much and reading about your moon signs made me very emotional. I think one day, I'll do another one of these posts with more in depth look at some of the other houses.

As promised, here are who I think Joel might be well suited to (I was going to include sun and moon combinations but I am tired, so you're only getting sun):

I think he'd do well with any fixed signs because they're stable and determined and I feel like he'd appreciate a partner like that. Fixed signs include Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius. I think he'd also do well with Earth signs, since I think he'd appreciate a grounded partner and someone that can match him and challenge him, and even direct him. Earth signs include: Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn.

Also, as promised, I think Joel himself is probably an Earth sign. He's stubborn but grounded, he can be patient but also inflexible. I won't say which one exactly though, I need more time with that.

If you read this far, thanks for reading my lil thing here! Happy tlou day!

Please feel free to disagree with me about this or let me know what you think! A lot of my info came from this website!

#joel miller #tlou #the last of us #happy birthday GRIMACE

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dresshistorynerd · 2 months

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Ranking Men's Costumes in Period Dramas - Part II: The Good

Part I: The Bad

This is the second part to my ranking of men's costumes in Renaissance period dramas. I selected 10 shows and films which I think have great costuming for the female characters and ranked them according to their costumes for male characters. I have noticed that even when women's costuming is great, men's costuming might be absolutely dog shit. And that's very much what we saw in the first part, where I ranked the five worst entries. For some reason shows and movies are afraid to put men, especially the characters who are supposed to be cool, manly and hot, into historical costumes. And I'm not even asking for historical accuracy, I just don't want my male characters living in the actual 1500s in basically modern leather jackets and pants. Like I don't watch period dramas for vaguely historically inspired modern fashion, I watch it for the historical setting, which costumes help create. This time we will be looking some rare gems that actually imo have really good costuming even for the male characters. For the five best entries, we'll go from worst to best.

5. Eizabeth R (1971)

Elizabeth R is incredibly committed to historical accuracy in it's outfits, especially for queen Elizabeth herself, many of her costumes being directly recreated from her portraits. It covers the whole reign of Elizabeth, so this commitment is especially admirable as the timeline is more than 40 years, including a stark shift in fashion from less structured and more toned down Tudor fashion to the extremes of the highly structured Elizabethan fashion. It's not perfect, The hair is not always great and like many others they fail at French hoods, though they are not upward pointing or pseudo crowns detached from the hood, so could be much worse.

The men's costumes are also very good. They are faithful to history, they wear stockings, very short trunk hose, ruffs and even have some structuring in their doublets and jerkins. However, the reason this is not higher is that the men's costumes especially, but also many other costumes beside Elizabeth's are looking a little sloppy. There's some structure yes, but the men's silhouettes are just not bold enough and they end up looking a little costumy. Even the codpieces are shrunk so small I'm not even sure if they are the half the time. Cowardice. Here's two Robert Dudley's costumes and an actual portrait of him. I think the second costume is probably an attempt at recreation of that portrait, but it's just kinda halfway there.

4. Taming of the Shrew (1967)

This film is set in Renaissance Italy, the women's costumes fit well to 1520s-30s. They are honestly really great and cohesive. My only gripe is that their bodices have a very 1960s shape and the make-up is a little distractingly modern. But the costuming is not attempting to recreate historical accuracy, rather they took the historical silhouette and basic elements and crafted a very over the top but cohesive look. I honestly love these very much.

An interesting choice is made with the men's costuming, especially the main male lead, whose costume is based much more on the Renaissance German men's fashion of that period. His costumes resemble the over the top fashion of the German Landsknecht (first image below). In Italy (second image below) the doublets were also very voluminous and quite colourful but not to that extent as by the Landsknecht and literally no one, not even the other Germans, rocked that slashed style as hard.

This is not really criticism though. In fact I respect that choice a lot. His costumes are certainly not historically accurate, but they do fit the bombastic aesthetics of the overall costuming, they are loud, large and not afraid to fuck around. This man oozes sex-appeal much more than any character with some modern plain black pants and leather jacket. This is how you costume a Renaissance man who fucks.

3. Tulip Fever (2017)

I am stretching the definition or Renaissance here a bit, I admit. This movie is set during the 1630s tulip mania, by which point the remnants of Renaissance fashion had already been left to the previous decade. However, I do think most of the movies and tv set in Baroque era also struggle with the men's costumes. Though not as much, because black was fashionable for everyone, the cod piece was gone, trunk hose were replaced by more palatable Venetian hose, fashion was much more stripped down from embellishments, leather was not uncommon in jerkins and appeared even in doublets and hose and the Hollywoods beloved boots became as actual fashion items. The men's silhouette in this period is very silly in my opinion and people seem to agree because it's usually skipped in costuming, but overall the period seems to fit modern masculinity standards much more easily than Renaissance era.

But I just really wanted to include this because the costuming is absolutely stunning. I have not watched the movie and probably never will because the post production was an absolute mess and it apparently came out as just a bad movie, which is a shame, but the costumes are so good. The ruffs are perfectly crispy. The buttons are dense and look just right. The shoes, both boots and otherwise are exactly right. The fabrics are honestly perfect. The silhouettes are just as goofy as they are supposed to be. And the women too have perfect silhouettes. All the details are just simply perfect. You rarely find costuming this meticulously created with historical details and great construction.

Honestly these top three could all be the best one. This final order was decided purely on which costumes i like more. And while I love the women's fashion of this period, I think the men's fashion is kinda stupid and boring, so I don't like these costumes on aesthetic level as much as the top two.

2. Romeo and Juliet (1968)

This movie is a perfect counterpart to the movie with the worst men's costuming which I talked about in the first post, Rosaline. They are both set in Italy around very end of 15th century and retell Romeo and Juliet. Both have very good costuming for female characters but obviously I think differ greatly in the male character costuming department. Romeo and Juliet costuming takes some artistic liberties to create a heightened reality quite similar to Taming of the Shrew costuming, but follows history much more closely. The colors are bright, the hose are tight, the giorneas are voluminous, the sleeves are long and massive and the cod pieces are prominent. Even the hair is perfect, even for women, they even use hairnets. I imagine the hair was quite easy to get right as hairstyles in 60s and 70s were basically lifted directly from 1400s Italian hairstyles. The men are even wearing appropriate hats??? Amazing.

The costuming perfectly captures the era, but they still clearly had fun with the costumes too. Honestly even though I appreciate the meticulously recreated historically accurate costuming, like in Tulip Fever, I tend to like more costuming that does take some artistic liberties to create a distinct look and atmosphere for the movie or tv show. There's some small things they don't get quite right, like having standard lacing instead of ladder lacing, metal eyelets (which would become a thing as late as in 1830s) and most egregiously Juliet in one scene has this very dumb supportive undergarment without even shift under it (first picture below)?? The outer garments were supportive during this era, there was no such thing as supportive undergarment. Shift was the only undergarment. But I will forgive these errors because the costuming is overall so fun and gorgeous. And they did get some details so so right, like look at Romeo's arming doublet (second picture below)! It has Lombardian sleeves!! This was a very specific style of arming doublet for this era and place. However those errors does prevent it from taking the first place. Which leads us to...

1. Orlando (1992)

This movie has Tilda Swinton in flamboyant Elizabethan men's clothing. That's all.

Okay, I that is all that needs to be said, but I will say more. This movie spans centuries and shows excellent costumes from several different periods, but I will focus on the Elizabethan costumes only for the sake of this post. The costuming is not super historically accurate in all the detailing, and clearly not trying to be, but it is always impeccable. Even while it takes artistic liberties and the story has an immortality fantastical element it still captures the men's fashion's silhouette much better than any other movie or tv show I know of set in this period. It does that better than the "we recreated these portraits" Elizabeth R. But what really makes this the best in my humble opinion, is that the movie is not afraid of the effeminate and emasculated modern perception of Renaissance men's fashion, no, it leans into it. The thole story is very much about gender and gender fuckery. Tilda Swinton plays the titular Orlando who is a cis man in Elizabethan era, becomes inexplicably immortal and later inexplicably turns into a woman for the rest of their several centuries. He is the embodiment of "I'm not sure if they are a butch or a twink" and as a bisexual I can only be grateful. But in all seriousness I think the costuming and the casting (queen Elizabeth is also played by a male actor) are so perfectly utilized to highlight the arbitrary construction of gender without needing to say it explicitly.

Conclusion

I have some closing thoughts. I took on this task as a way to show a point, which is that for some reason in Renaissance shows and film especially men's costuming is piss-poor, even when women's costuming is great. Male characters tend to have very bad costuming in Medieval media too, though this is also an issue for female characters. I don't think I have ever seen a Medieval show or movie with truly excellent costuming for anyone. In Renaissance media the issue is clearly not lack of skill or knowledge, they choose to do so. My thesis was that the producers think that the Renaissance men's fashion is too effeminate and too unsexy for the hot male very heterosexual lead, who the mostly female audience are supposed fawn over like the female characters. I still think it's very true.

Though there's an interesting trend I only noticed while doing this ranking; every entry (except the least bad) in the worst five list are from 21th century, and every entry (except Tulip Fever which is a little bit cheating anyway) in this best five list are from 20th century. I have some theories on why it turned out this way. First is that the studios have become increasingly more concerned with growing profits so they don't take risks and they put pressure on movies and tv shows to be as broadly appealing as possible. This means they can't just make period dramas for the core audience of period dramas, aka mostly women who are history nerds, so they pander to the modern sensibilities in costuming and not to the people who love to see actual historical costuming. Secondly, I think this might also tie to the broader conservative backlash against loosening of gender roles and broader queer acceptance. Among the core audiences of period dramas there are two distinct groups, queer nerds and conservative/centrist women, who don't want politics in their media, which is why they love historical stories because obviously queerness wasn't invented yet and people of colour didn't exist yet (they were and did). (They are not always this extreme, but you get the point.) As men wearing dresses has become a culture war issue, I think the studio executives are afraid that anything not masculine enough in modern standards might cause the more conservative audiences to turn on them. Even if they knew about the queer nerds, they wouldn't care about them.

This bears repeating: cowards.

As a thank you for reading all the way to the end I will leave you with the image of Tilda Swinton in mid 1600s men's clothing. You are welcome.

Part I: The Bad

#fashion history #history #historical costuming #costuming #renaissance fashion #renaissance costuming #film costuming #historical men's fashion

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