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ladykailitha · 3 months

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Staking My Claim Part 6

And here we are! The end of this sweet little story. I had a blast writing it and I enjoyed all the comments and tags. Thank you so much.

We get to the "is this set after canon or a no monster AU *shrugs* could be either" part of the story.

Part 1|Part 2|Part 3| Part 4|Part 5

@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @emly03

***

When he woke up next it was dark out and his stomach was growling. As he sat up he could smell the warm heat of something cooking in the kitchen. He went to the bathroom and washed his hands. He knew he should brush his teeth and he vaguely remembered Eddie saying something about a spare around here somewhere, but he couldn’t remember where. And he really, really didn’t want to go rummaging through the drawers.

He gave up and decided to do it after dinner and have Eddie show him where it was.

He ran his fingers through his hair to tame the tousled look to something more respectable. He really didn’t think it worked. He had slept with it wet and it would take getting it wet and washed before he could properly tame it.

Jeff grinned at him when he came stumbling out. “Just in time, man. Eddie’s making his famous spaghetti.”

“It smells heavenly,” he murmured.

“Just wait ‘til you taste it, Stevie,” Eddie said with a wide, happy smile. “It’ll blow your mind.”

Steve blushed. “You didn’t have to wait for me to eat, I could have reheated leftovers or something.”

Jeff and Eddie shared a grin.

“This is when we usually eat,” Jeff explained. “We were working on a song for our band earlier.”

“I’m our lyricist,” Eddie said. “Jeff is the composer. He takes my silly little words and turns them into songs.”

Steve nodded. “And you guys play at Cora’s Den?”

“The Hideout and Alleyways, too,” Jeff confirmed. “But yeah, Cora’s Den is our main spot though, which is why Mrs. Hughes pays for this apartment for us to stay at when we’re here.”

“I’m still having trouble wrapping my head around the fact that Gareth’s parents are rich enough to afford a three bedroom apartment in the middle of Indy for you guys to crash at whenever you want,” Steve admitted. “My parents would never do that.”

Eddie shrugged. “We knew Gareth’s family had money when he first started playing with us. No poor schmuck living in Forest Hills was going to buy their ten year old a drum kit and remain sane.”

“Yeah,” Jeff agreed. “We just didn’t know how much until he offered his parent’s garage to practice in. That place has better acoustics then most bars we’ve played in.”

“Just what do his parents do?” Steve asked in awe.

“They run those fancy boutiques for pets,” Eddie said. “They have five shops around the country. Here in Indy, Chicago, New York, LA...and what’s the other one?”

“Miami,” Jeff said.

Eddie snapped his fingers. “That’s it! They charge hundreds of dollars for rich morons to make their pets as pampered as possible.”

“That explains more than it doesn’t,” Steve sneered. “My parents hate animals. The thought of a pet treated better than they treat their own son would have driven them crazy.”

“Not even a goldfish in the Harrington household?” Jeff asked, cocking his head to the side.

Steve laughed bitterly. “And have the water spill on the perfect hardwood floors? Not likely.”

“Even I had a hamster at one point,” Eddie said, shaking his head. “You are seriously missing out.”

“I’m hoping when I get a place of my own I’ll be able to get a cat,” he confessed.

“Aww...” Eddie said. “What kind?”

Steve shrugged. “Probably a rescue.”

Jeff and Eddie smiled softly.

“Sounds good, Steve,” Jeff murmured.

“Food is done!” Eddie said with a flourish. “Spaghetti in meat sauce.” He blinked for a moment. “You’re not vegetarian are you?”

Steve laughed. “No. You probably missed me tucking into the bacon and sausage for breakfast.”

Eddie tilted his head to the side. “Oh right.”

He dished out the food on three plates and handed one to each of Jeff and Steve before grabbing his own plate and sitting on the other side of Steve.

They tucked into their meals and ate quietly. A testament to how good it tasted.

For Steve, it was warm and hearty, filling a void he didn’t know he had. Even when he was in high school, he didn’t have a lot of guy friends and while he loved the Party with all his heart, it wasn’t the same as hanging out with people his age.

Once they were done, Jeff did dishes. Eddie led him over to their large fluffy sofa.

Steve settled in, curled up to Eddie’s side as he talked with Jeff about the new song.

It had been so long since he felt this safe. Like if he drifted off to sleep right now, he would be protected.

And wasn’t that just something.

Eddie’s voice broke through his revery. “Hey, sweetheart. I think you’re falling asleep again.”

“Being drugged sucks.”

Jeff laughed. “It sounds like you’ve been drugged more than once, man.”

Eddie and Steve looked at each other, then Steve winced.

“I may have angered a couple of Russian officers when I accidentally stumbled on their very illegal operation under the Starcourt Mall?” he said through gritted teeth.

Jeff rolled his eyes. “Considering how messed up Hawkins is, nothing surprises me anymore.”

Eddie and Steve huffed out a laugh.

“You’ve got that right,” Eddie said. “Come on, darlin’, let’s get you to bed.”

They got ready for bed and Steve finally got that toothbrush to brush his teeth. He washed his face and Eddie led him back to his bedroom.

Once Steve had gotten comfortable, he pulled Eddie to him before he could protest.

“You’re mine now,” Steve murmured happily. “I licked you. Remember?”

Eddie chuckled. “I guess finder’s keepers. I’ll happily be yours.”

They curled up on the bed and slept soundly knowing that they were heading back to Hawkins with more then the hookup they assumed it was going to be when Eddie first came to his aid.

And Steve couldn’t have been happier.

He was going to have to do something really nice for Robin as a thank you.

As he was falling to sleep, he felt Eddie lick the side of his face. He giggled and pressed their lips together. Eddie hummed happily.

“Love you, Stevie.”

“Love you, too, Eds.”

***

And if you saw this on Saturday, no you didn't. I hit post instead of schedule and it was not meant for human eyes yet.

Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @messrs-weasley @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog @justforthedead89 @bookworm0690 @vecnuthy @bookbinderbitch @littlewildflowerkitten @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @scheodingers-muppet @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @genderless-spoon @anne-bennett-cosplayer @irregular-child @lololol-1234 @monsterloverforhire @mugloversonly @live-the-fangirl-life @hellfireone @lublix @breealtair @croatoan-like-its-hot @f0xxyb0xxes @jamieweasley13 @r0binscript @confuseddisastertm @sleepdeprivedflower @thedragonsaunt @dissociatingdemon @dragonmama76

#my writing #stranger things #steddie #ladykailtiha writes #corroded coffin

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gallusrostromegalus · 7 months

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So, I am begging you here, pls tell me that Ikkaku and Yumichika are still bffs on this AU. I need the violent miss- and yet perfectly matched bastards to still be forever ride-and-die with each other.

Also, all the dropped tidbits relating to Yumichika are gold and I am hoarding them like a squirrel hoards his nuts for winter.

They are actually, for real, legally married.

Ikkaku was 500% ready to fight the entire Gotei-13 when he took the 628-year old marriage certificate he and Yumichika had gotten in 72 North to the Seireitei Records Office to be honored.

Instead, the sole hiccup in the process was the young lady behind the counter asking him to spell Yumichika's surname for her as this document seems to have been... stained, at some point.

"-That's not... Blood, is it?" She asks, concerned.

"Uh. It's actually. Um. Soy Sauce." Ikkaku mumbles.

It would have been less embarrassing if it had been blood.

Turns out, Gay marriage- and indeed, divorce, or changing your name, or gender, or becoming the third, fourth or seventeenth parent/legal guardian to a kid is a nonissue in soul society, because someone complained *once* and Yamamoto declared that, one, he didn't care, and two, the rest of the military commanders were hired off death row, and *this* is what you're complaining about? Fuck off.

But here are some Yumichika Fun Facts:

Everyone in the 11th division has really, really good personal hygiene and well-cared for hands, feet and nails because Yumichika's mother was a doctor at a rural hospital and put the fear of dysentery, cholera, pneumonia, tetanus, sepsis, trench rot and necrosis into him even more than fear of the gods, and he very much continued this sanitary evangelism.

Yumichika's other mother was a drag queen at the brothel that adjoined the hospital and taught him all about hair, makeup, poisons, manners, alley fights, how to play the shamisen, how to make a knife out of anything, flower arrangement and how to curse the hell out of a motherfucker of it comes to that.

Kubo was wrong Yumichika looks out for all his sisters not just his cis-ters.

Kenpachi was friends with Yumichika before either of the ever knew Ikkaku. He met Yumichika shortly after adopting Yachiru when Yumichika saved him from drowning in the river that ran through his home village.

Kenpachi asked Yumichika what he could do in gratitude for saving his life, and Yumichika, seeing his sword, asked if Kenpachi could "give him a real fight, for once"

They had a jolly little scrap that left Yumichika in the hospital for three months, an almost insatiable lust for battle, and a permanent bald scar on the edge of his eyebrow, which is where he glues the decorative feathers he wears.

It also got him (lovingly) told to move out and make his way in the world.

Yumichika met Ikkaku some years after that, when the theater/brothel he was working at hired Ikkaku on as an Emcee and a comedy act in his own right.

Ikkaku loves making people laugh and is damn good at it.

Yumichika was already considering making a move on him when a heckler pulled a sword on Yumichika during his act and Ikkaku beat the shit out of him with a chair without a second thought, and Yumichika decided he was going to seduce and marry this bald little maniac then and there.

It still took the better part of six months, because Ikkaku was convinced that Yumichika was "Way out of his league" and "He's just being friendly to a coworker!".

Things finally became clear when, having reached a boiling point of sexual frustration, Yumichika challenged Ikkaku to a duel, beat the hell out of Ikkaku with Kujaku, and screamed his feelings directly into Ikkaku's face.

"Oh." Said Ikkaku. "Why didn't you say something?"

"I'VE BEEN SAYING THINGS AND SHOWING YOU THINGS AND SITTING IN YOUR LAP AND KISSING YOU FOR SIX MONTHS YOU FUCKING MORON."

"...I may be stupid."

"At least you're also cute. C'mere you sexy cueball."

-and they have been blissfully if dramatically wedded since.

It was many years after that that they had moved on to a different brothel as a duo floor show act, when they got to talking to some of the other working girls about their travels and Yumichika tells the story of how he got his eyebrow scar saving a real freak of a guy from drowning after he got stabbed by a river stingray, but then he challenged him to a fight because- well, he was young and cocky and a small fish, but in a tiny pond- and promptly got his ass beat.

"That's wild!" Says Ikkaku. "I also challenged a random freak with a stingray scar on his leg to a fight because I was bored and- all due respect to you and Kujaku, my beloved - but he gave me a thrashing the likes of which I'd never had before or since. He had his daughter with him was the weird part- he was a real big bastard, face like a cliff, but his girl was this adorable little pink thing."

Yumichika sits up, frowning. "-seven feet tall in socks, big vertical scar on the right side of his face?" He asked, gesturing to his own.

Ikkaku put his drink down and pointed at Yumichika "-and bells in his hair! You fought Zaraki Kenpachi too??"

"Yes! What the hell?" Yumichika laughed. "I wonder where he is now..."

"Oh Gods, he had the WORST sense of direction! He's probably managed to walk in and back out of the Soul King's palace on accident!" Ikkaku giggled

"Well, if he's the same seven foot tall sword bastard with the scarred face and pink little girl on his shoulder as the seven foot tall sword bastard with the scarred face and the pink little girl on his shoulder standing out in the street looking lost as hell, you can go ask him." Said their coworker Sachiko, pointing to the giant standing not a dozen feet away.

"Look Ken-chan! It's YuYu and Baldy!" Yachiru giggled.

"Yachiru!" Yumichika gasped, delighted.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME THAT!" bellowed Ikkaku.

"YOU AGAIN!" Zaraki bellowed, ecstatic. " BEEN A FEW YEARS, LET'S SEE HOW MUCH YOU LEARNED!!"

Ten minutes of incredible violence, twelve minutes of evading the police and twenty-one minutes of getting lost on the way back to the brothel, a bloodied but still standing Yumichika was explaining to the Madame that the giant bastard carrying the unconscious half of her prized floor show duo behind him was, in fact, an old friend of theirs whom she should absolutely hire as a bouncer, you can see how effective he is!

Madame Tsubaki, who recognizes incredible spiritual power and fighting potential when she sees it, and who is still very petty about the divorce from her husband the Shinigami Captain-General, allows herself to be persuaded.

#AEIWAM #an elephant is warm and mushy #bleach #bleach fanfiction #yumichika ayasegawa #ikkaku madarame #kenpachi zaraki #yachiru kusajishi

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soulprompts · 2 years

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𝐂𝐎𝐎𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 (𝐏𝐓. 𝟏)

so, i absolutely love cooking! it's a passion of mine, i've been cooking for my family for years, people seem to find my food edible enough, and i recently found myself unable to cook at all for about a week, resulting in this little list coming into existence! i'm most likely going to make more of these, simply because the dynamics in a kitchen are varied as hell, right? we have romantic couples who cook together as a hobby, there's professional restaurant kitchen settings, baking oriented stuff, cooking with kids, there's a LOT to be done w the topic! so these are more for the chaos of someone who cannot boil an egg to save their life, vs. someone who enjoys cooking and is widely considered to be a dab hand at it! DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST! but i do hope you enjoy it as much as i enjoyed making it!

" hey, hey, it's okay! we'll scrape off the burnt bits! "

" here, let me chop the onions, okay? you can dice the peppers and beef; just be sure to do them on separate boards, yeah? "

" you... you know the wine was for the stew, don't you?! "

" i swear to you, i don't know how this happened. i followed every single instruction, word for word! "

" taste this and tell me what you think! "

" oh my god... this is AMAZING! you should have your own cooking show! "

" you're kidding me! no way this whole thing is vegan! it's just too good! "

" so, um... i might have possibly accidentally tipped the entire jar of cayenne pepper into the soup... and by might have, i mean definitely. "

" i think i'm gonna have to ask you to leave the kitchen before you hurt somebody. "

" it says here to fold in the eggs... now, tell me, how exactly does one do that? "

" i might have over-exaggerated my cooking skills... and blown up the oven. "

" look, it sounds gross, but i'm telling you, when it's cooked right, it's the best thing ever! "

" i lied to my date and now they think i'm this amazing cook when i'm absolutely not, so please, can you spare me the lecture and just teach me how to cook? "

" woah, woah, woah... try chopping like this. yeah, that's it. you won't chop off your hand this way. "

" so, um... how exactly did it manage to stay frozen solid on the inside, but scorch to a crisp on the outside? "

" okay, remember when it asked for fifty grams of sugar? yeah. i accidentally used salt. "

" well, at least we know the smoke alarms work, right? "

" i ruined three knives, i have a roast chicken embedded in my ceiling, my oven officially needs therapy, and so do i! wanna call it quits and order a pizza? "

" i swear, you're one of those kitchen gods who can make ice cubes taste fantastic! "

" this is the fun part! take that tenderiser, and beat the absolute crap out of that pile of steaks. "

" i'm trying so hard not to judge you right now, but... onion goggles?! "

" how on earth did you get pasta sauce on the ceiling? "

" you know every single firefighter in town knows my name? and my top three favorite comfort foods to bring each time i trigger the fire alarm? yeah. that's my culinary reputation. "

" hey. it's okay. this isn't the first time i've burnt dinner. i have taco bell on speed dial. "

" sometimes recipes just don't work out. and that's okay! what matters is that you tried. "

" i didn't realize it was even possible to burn water! "

" ah... i see where you went wrong. the recipe uses paprika. this is chilli powder. "

" quit eating the batter, or we'll have no cupcakes at all! "

" no! no way. i'm not tasting anything cooked by you; not since your orange juice gave me food poisoning. "

" the last time i tried to cook, my pot roast ended up on fire and put a hole in my dry wall. i had to hang paintings over it until i could refill the crater. "

" no, you cannot cook chicken medium-rare. wanna know why? because that means it's raw. and you'll end up with food poisoning. and i'll have to tell you what a moron you were to even think that was an acceptable thing to do in the first place. "

" i thought you teaching me how to cook would be all soft and friendly, like the great british bake-off! but it's more like hell's kitchen. "

" no tears in my kitchen, thank you! "

" six fires in three hours is your personal best! only problem is, we're making fruit salad... "

" i understand that it's meant to be salted caramel, but... exactly how much salt did you use?! "

#roleplay meme #rp meme #dialogue prompts #sentence starters #writing prompts #roleplay prompt #roleplay prompts #rp prompts #food tw #food mention tw

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starful02 · 2 months

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You know how they say not to judge a book by its cover? Well, this book is as pretty on the inside as it is on the outside! I absolutely adore it to pieces! It has taken its rightful place on my bookshelf alongside my first copy and other related books! And for fellow crow brained individuals who love pretty shiny things like myself, you should definitely keep an eye on June for the upcoming hilarious pirate novel "Running Close to the Wind" by the same fabulous author Alexandra Rowland! As they say, pirates always have a few pretty shiny things. 😉 Read an excerpt of it below!

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amphibiahawks321 · 5 months

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Senju : That movie was absolutely amazing! Did you see that car crash scene?! It went absolutely KABOOM!

M!Reader : [laughs] I know I know it was an amazing movie....

M!Reader : ....

M!Reader : But did you see that heist getaway scene?!

Senju : the car chase was so intense!

M!Reader : They went so fast!

Senju : the boss went 'Hurry up!!' and they went VROOM!

M!Reader : And-

[Accidentally bumped]

Thug : Watch where you're going moron!

M!Reader : Sorry dude I didn't mean to bump into you I didn't see you walking next to me-

[Grabs M!Reader collar]

Thug : What the hell is that supposed to mean?! Oh so you think I'm invisible to you!?

[Taps his shoulder]

Thug : Huh?

Senju : He already apologize...

[Grips his shoulder]

Senju : Let....him....go

Thug : Ha! Sit down honey or I'll beat you up too

[M!Reader gives the thug a shocked face]

Thug : What?!

M!Reader : I'm so sorry

Thug : Yeah you better you-

M!Reader : For you

Thug : Huh?

[He feels senju grips his shoulder again but way more tighter]

Thug : W-what the?!

Senju : I'm so glad no one is around right now...

Thug : Huh-

[10 minutes later]

[The thug is now on the ground with a nose bleed while senju is standing on top of him]

Thug : What kind of monster are you?!

Senju : A way meaner one if you don't get the fuck out of here in the next 3 second....

[The thug immediately runs away]

[Senju immediately runs up to you]

Senju : Are you ok dear?!

M!Reader : Y-yeah I'm ok but I'm more worried about you're....... Pasta sauce hands

Senju : ....Crap you're right

M!Reader : Let's go wash it before anyone thinks you just murdered someone yeah? [Chuckles]

Senju : definitely!

#male reader #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #reader x tokyo revengers #senju kawaragi #senju kawaragi x reader #reader x senju kawaragi

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slow-burn-sally · 7 months

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I think one of the most frustrating things about being neurodivergent, for me anyway, is the inconsistency. My whole life, I've vacillated back and forth between seeing myself as an intelligent, popular, well loved person, and then I'll lose my drivers' license, say something hurtful, forget to pay a bill, or send an email at work to seven other people that completely exposes me as the world's largest moron, and I think "I can't be intelligent. In fact, I must be very stupid." I mean, what else am I supposed to think? All my life, people who do things like this are considered less intelligent, so that's the only template I have.

The thing is, half of me is very clever, hilariously funny, charming, and organized. Have of me is also clumsy, forgetful, socially inept, moody, and the worst, most horrible troll that ever lurked, pustule-covered, under a darkened bridge.

These two people are always inside me, waiting to assert themselves. Just at the moment when I truly believe that I've hacked this AuDHD thing, when I'm really riding high on that wave of success. When I remember everything I'm supposed to, and remember to get gas, and pay the internet bill on time, the Other One pokes it's head up, and then I'm a fucking mess.

Yesterday, I got home from a great day at work, where I'd contributed, and worked well with my team, and correctly answered oh so many questions. Then opened my mail, found out I was being sued for a car accident I'd been involved in due to distracted driving from 2 years ago. I look at the paperwork for roughly 5 minutes, the adrenaline allowing me to actually read it (not possible if I wasn't losing my shit with fear), but it doesn't make any sense, because it's purposefully obtuse legal language. I walk into the kitchen, freaking out silently, intending to test my roommate's chili, (because, when you find out you're being sued, the next thing you should do is eat) and drop the spoon on the floor, causing the tomato sauce to splat across the tiles. I proceed have a total meltdown where I begin sobbing, and yelling at my roommate not to come near me, not to even look at me, while I hyperventilate and spray the floor with disinfectant. I go from Self Contained Adult to Panicky Child in .2 seconds.

I am such a badass, and so in control of everything, and then I'm an irrational mess who sometimes hits herself out of frustration, and who can't add numbers higher than 12 + 12. I have tons of friends, lots of mutuals. I enjoy hobbies. I love my job. I love my roommate. I am absolutely privileged and blessed to live the life I live, but fuck, man, I wish I could just have it stay on the easier path for longer. Why is it always so inconsistent?

#neurodivergent #actually audhd #autism #adhd #it's been a week

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neotrances · 5 months

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so annoyed whenever some uppity chef on tiktok says putting sauce or spices on veggies make them unhealthy like oh i didn’t know alfredo sauce and paprika takes the healthy stuff out of brocoli, idiot, moron

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britishassistant · 6 months

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Bc I love badass yuu moments

I can only imagine if Villain!yuu got one of those.

Like, some other supervillain is trying to take their Territory and it would be a job to the league to take care off, but Crowley put them in charge just to prove something but THEN

This new villain kidnaps one of the first years or yuuken and Yuu goes full on super-badass-villain mode, noone tortures theirs, maybe, sorta, kinda, only friends!

Without any super powers Yuu banes the other villain like the goddam badass they can be and the boys are just .... "that was hot" "oh God I wish that was me"

Anonymous said: When things do go Villain!Yuu’s way, it helps cement that despite their pitfalls they ARE still Crowley’s chosen heir. A new gang try’s to edge into Yuu’s territory and start causing more devastating damage to the city? The next day news reports that old warehouse that the group was using blown to Timbuktu and all the gang members are now being treated for injuries that would have killed them outright if whatever caused the damage wasn’t so scarily precise. Those state officials that were swindling the water treatment plant? They can never work a job ever again with the shear amount of evidence of other crimes they’ve committed being leaked through their own social media accounts.

Thank you for the asks, dear anons!

“Well, aren’t you a sorry lot?”

Jack snarls, twisting in the ropes tying them all to the central pillar in the car park in such a way that the material digs in even harder into Ace’s stomach.

“Agh, quit, you ass-!” He’s barely able to gasp out alongside Deuce’s groan and Epel’s muttering of “Tight, tight, too tight!”

Ortho doesn’t say anything. Hasn’t since one of the guys who took them hit him with some kind of tazer-stick-thing.

The villain just chuckles, strolling around so he’s got a good view of Jack. “Really, when I heard the Supervisor was the Night Raven’s heir, I expected some panache, some machismo from the trusted minions they left guarding their lair. Not…this.”

Epel lets out a wordless growl of rage.

Ace is very aware of the pizza sauce stain on his pants, the beer he spilled on his shirt giving off a wheaty smell.

But he’s never been very good at keeping his mouth shut.

“And I expected that the biggest guy here would actually get his hands dirty rather than hide behind a buncha meatheads,” He calls out. “But I guess we’re all getting disappointed today, huh?”

There’s a pause, and then the sharp click of dress shoes against the concrete.

“I don’t know if the minger here really has the room to criticize, does he boys?” The supervillain makes a show of looking around the hired muscle pretending to lounge about the room, waiting for their mandatory laughter and agreement. “Especially not after the gaffe he pulled.”

Ace glares as this asshole gives him a truly unpleasant smile.

“A-Ace?” Epel says, peering at the side of his face.

“Oh? You mean they don’t know?” The villain mock-gasps. “Well, listen up kiddos, because this is how your little buddy well and truly fucked you over.”

“You bastard—!” Deuce growls, riled up already.

“There he was, ready and poised to hit some button to seal us in or shoot us or unleash whatever toys the Supervisor has tidied away.” The villain boasts dramatically, “But, in the hour of your deepest need, what does our friend here do? Does he act to protect the lair, his comrades?”

Sebek is turning red in a way usually reserved for those who insult his “Malleus-sama”, glaring furiously between Ace and this guy.

“No! Instead, our ginger minger abandons his duty so he can shove some whiny tot into an air vent!” There’s a raucous chorus of laughter and jeering that sets Ace’s teeth on edge. “And then he let himself go down trying to keep you boys from grabbing her! I’d be moved to tears, if it wasn’t so hilarious!!”

He feels his jaw grind so hard it hurts.

“What sort of moron sacrifices himself so a brat could get away?” The villain looms over Ace. “Some friendly advice, newbie. The infant and her sippy cup aren’t going to save you.”

The gob of saliva that hits him in the eye stings.

“Better that than going around with a face like some kinda freakish overgrown rat.” He snarks, the smirk on his face almost a snarl. “Seriously, have you ever even looked in a mirror? Or wait, my bad, is this what you look like when you’re actually trying to look normal?”

The laughter cuts off.

It’s fast enough that Ace feels the ropes shift as the others look around.

Blinking to try and clear his vision, Ace glances up.

The villain’s face has gone a deep puce, blood veins bulging in his forehead, eyes, and neck, a fearsome grimace turning his expression truly bestial.

“Tazer!” He snarls.

“But boss—!”

“Tazer!!” The villain roars, spittle frothing at his lips.

Some muscle-bound chump scurries up with his tail between his legs, offering that black stick that took Ortho out so easily.

It whines as the villain jams it on, sparks crackling off the end.

“A rat, am I?” The villain mutters, advancing on Ace as he presses himself back against the pillar. “A rat?! You dare…I’ll show you. I’ll show you what a rat looks like, you miserable, squirming vermin!!”

Ace can’t help yelping as he sees the baton come down, eyes squeezed shut—!

There’s a shout and a…caw?

Ace cracks one eye open.

The villain is clutching his baton hand, dripping blood from deep gouges into the meat of his fingers.

Staring after a huge, familiar black bird that’s flying off with the baton in its talons.

“Di-Diavolo!” He hears Deuce call out.

He watches as Diavolo soars up into the rafters, and merges into the darkness above them. Darkness, he realizes with a start, that has somehow grown teeming with thousands of beady eyes and rustling feathers.

Black birds.

Hundreds upon hundreds of them, staring down at them from the walls and rafters with an intent that sends chills down Ace’s spine.

“Wh-what the hell?!” Yells one of the thugs.

“You know, Ace,” Comes a voice that could be called nonchalant if it wasn’t for the slight tremor in its words. “You can be really cool when you let yourself be.”

Ace can’t help the grin that curves across his face even as he want to break down. “Like you’re one to talk!! What the hell took ya so long?!”

Yuu gives a tiny smile, and huffs a small, wry laugh.

Then the expression drops from their face, and the Supervisor glares imperiously down at their enemies.

“And you.” The click of their high heels is as sharp as their tone. “You’ve got some nerve, attacking my lair, hurting my minions.”

The villain scoffs, attempting to slick his hair back as he turns to face them. “The Supervisor, I presume? I’m—”

“I don’t care.” The Supervisor cuts in. “You’ll be nobody once I hand you over to that detective waiting outside. Nice guy, even bothered by a small timer like you.”

“Small timer?!” The villain growls, sweat beading his brow. “How dare you?!”

Grim lets out a low, growling cackle from where he’s lounging across Yuu’s shoulders, looking menacing for once in his life. “Yeah, rat-face! A rodent like you better bow down before the great Grim-sama!”

The villain bulges in anger, tremors wracking his frame.

“Ge-GET THEM!!” He yells. “BRING ME THAT UPSTART’S HEAD!!”

The thugs advance on Yuu, brandishing pipes and knuckle dusters.

“Alright, guys.” The Supervisor rolls their neck as Grim rises to pounce. “Lab rules. This’ll get loud.”

At those words, Ace’s eyes automatically shut again and he turns to press his face into Sebek’s shoulder, as he feels Epel press against his.

There’s a cacophony of caws and the rattle of their dropped cargo. The blinding blasts of light and BOOMS of the charges detonating flash against his eyelids, feeling the foundations tremble under him.

He opens his eyes to see the goons on the floor, groaning in pain.

The villain is the last left standing, heaving in outrage before charging at the Supervisor with a reckless, infuriated scream.

Grim rears up and unleashes a torrent of fire in the bastard’s face.

As he stumbles away, scrabbling at the flames on his hair and clothes, the birds descend upon him in a flurry of sharp beaks and talons.

With a yell he swats out, attempting to drive off the flock. And some of them do retreat, descending on the thugs that were trying to get up.

Creating an opening for the Supervisor to drive the baton into the villain’s throat with ruthless efficiency.

There’s the whine of electricity and a high-pitched scream.

Ace watches as the bastard topples to the ground.

The breath rushes out of him.

“Human!” Sebek shouts, blowing out Ace’s eardrums. “Quit resting on your laurels! The robot needs medical attention, urgently!”

“R-right!” Yuu straightens, rushing over with a pair of bolt cutters, babbling as they saw at the ropes. “I-Idia’s waiting back at the lair to fix him up, we’ll go out the back so we can avoid the detective, and the heroes. Diavolo and company will make sure these jerks aren’t going anywhere we don’t want them, and meet us back at the lair later. I don’t think they can arrest birds, so it should be fine?”

“Right. Let’s move.” Jack still has the burr of a growl in his voice as he shakes off the ropes, turning to Ortho besides him and scooping him up gently.

Epel is scavenging a pipe while Deuce is already up scouting out their escape route. Sebek begins bickering with Grim over whether he has to call him “Grim-sama” now or ever, taking a protective position at the rear.

Yuu falls back alongside Ace, offering a shoulder for him to lean on.

“Elena’s alright.” They mutter to him quietly. “She was in a bit of a state when she found me, but she’s home safe and sound. I promised we’d call in the car so she could hear you’re all okay.”

Ace can’t help the small grin that quirks his lips. “A~ah. At least that turned out okay. It’d be a real pain if she got herself kidnapped after all the shit I went through.”

Yuu smiles, broad and real. “Mr. Martin and Mr. Jon are very grateful to you, you know. I think they’re going to give you a present. A homemade sweater perhaps.”

“Geh!” He scowls at them. “What, is that some kinda punishment?! If they wanna reward me, I’ll take cash. Or food. Either or, I’m not picky.”

“The hell you sayin’, yer bein’ picky right now.” Epel interjects ahead of them.

Ace blows a raspberry. Jack lets out a chuckle and Yuu giggles next to him. Ortho somehow looks more like he’s sleeping than he did before. Sebek and Grim’s argument is reaching new levels of volume. Deuce is holding the door open to where the escape vehicle is parked outside on a double yellow line.

Ace lets himself be hustled into the car, and enjoys the moment of comfort and safety.

#twisted wonderland #twst #supervillain au #harassed villain yuu au #ace trappola #deuce spade #epel felmier #sebek zigvolt #jack howl #ortho shroud #twst yuu #twisted wonderland yuu #twst grim #twisted wonderland grim #happy halloween!#points to anyone who can guess what the villain is twisted from

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savemefromanepicoftimewasted · 7 months

Text

You Cannot Run From Your Past

Mobster!Simon "Ghost" Riley X F!Reader

The rest of the meal was quiet, save for the noise of knives and forks gently scraping against the ceramic plates. You were thankful for the silence, giving you the opportunity to think about everything that had happened that day. You’d gone from living on the streets to being housed by one of the most dangerous people in the country. a/n:this is a mafia au! so there will be a LOT of violence, MINORS DNI, this is part one of the series, the rest will be linked once posted warnings:mentions of wounds, blood, murder, gore, smut(MAJOR smut) word count:4.5k

Everyone knew who the 141 were, some of the most feared men on this side of the Atlantic. No one with even a single braincell knew to fuck with them. Their leader, Price, had killed men for less than what you were currently kneeling for. You’d gotten caught trying to steal money from one of the henchmen. Your boyfriend had kicked you out of the apartment, after finding out he’d been cheating of course, and now you were homeless. It was either steal from the, what you assumed was dumb, henchman or go hungry for another week until someone took pity on you. So here you were, kneeling before a man who wouldn’t think twice about putting a bullet between your brows.

“Did you really think he wouldn’t notice?” Price was more annoyed than truly angry, he felt some sort of sympathy towards you.

“I thought if I was quick enough he wouldn’t, no.” You were ashamed to admit you thought you could get away with your plan.

“Why were you trying to pickpocket anyway?” Price sat on the edge of his desk, staring down at you.

“Boyfriend, ex boyfriend, kicked me out and I’ve been living on the street for the last couple of months. Got desperate if I’m gonna be honest.” You hadn’t lived in England that long, having moved over from Massachusetts earlier in the year to live with your boyfriend.

God you had felt like such a moron, he’d lured you over with the promise of being able to take care of you, only to dump you out onto the street like trash. Of course he’d at least given the courtesy of telling you about Price and his men first, and yet here you were.

“Soap, take her and get her something to eat, I want to have a chat with the ex.” Your brow furrowed, why the hell did he want to talk with Eric anyway?

A man walked over, the strip of hair down the middle of his skull was slicked down yet looked almost fluffy. He helped you up gently, taking you down to the kitchen where a chef was cooking up something delicious. Your stomach grumbled loudly, leaving you embarrassed as everyone’s heads turned to stare at you. It really had been too long since you’d had a decent meal, not counting the scraps that the cook had given you a few days ago.

“Have a seat lass, eat as much as you’d like.” His voice wasn’t condescending and that you were grateful for, people could be so cruel to the homeless.

The chef dished up a heaping plate of what looked like spaghetti bolognese, the scent of roasted garlic and tomato filled the air. Your mouth was salivating within seconds, but before you could pull the plate closer the chef was sliding a heft piece of cheesy garlic bread on top. Oh my, you had definitely died and gone to heaven if this was going to be the case. You picked up your fork and slid the plate closer. The steam rising from the sauce caused a slight bead of sweat to rise along your browline. You couldn’t be bothered to wipe it away as you dug in, knowing better than to eat as fast as you could lest you get sick.

The flavours burst over your tongue like fireworks, this was definitely the best bowl of pasta you’d ever eaten. You swallowed the forkful you’d just eaten before biting into the garlic bread, nearly moaning at the salty bite of the cheese. This was how Price got to eat on the daily? God you would give anything just to eat like this at least once a month. Half the plate was gone before you came up for a breath, wiping your mouth with the napkin Soap had left by you.

“Would you like some water?” The chef was holding out a glass, his hands now clean that you noticed.

“Oh thank you so much.” You took the glass grateful, gulping down the water until there was nothing left.

You set the glass down next to your napkin, digging in once more to the amazing pasta. Maybe he was letting you eat one final meal before he killed you, there were worse ways to go. At this rate you weren’t going to complain, not since this was the first decent meal you’d had in forever. On the other side of town, you were completely unaware that Price had located your ex Eric and was paying him a personal visit.

Knuckles collided with the skin on his cheek, blood pouring from the wound opened by the ring on Price’s pinky.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Eric could barely lift his head, words slurred as his vision blurred.

“Do you really think I’m that naive? You worked for me, and yet your little friend is trying to steal from one of my men to get herself some food.” Price was beyond enraged, Eric was one of the lower henchmen, someone to clean up his dirty work mainly.

“Fuck, she’s still alive?” Eric screamed in pain as a blade dug into the skin and muscle of his shoulder.

Simon was standing by the door, arms crossed over his chest as he watched Price take care of a mistake he’d made. Though no one but Soap, Gaz, and Price were ever allowed to call him Simon, most people who bore witness to him as Ghost. He was the silent killer, slipping into someone’s apartment with ease and slipping out without leaving a trace behind. He’d had nearly as big a reputation as Price himself, for different reasons of course.

“Yes, she’s still alive, however since I’ve come to find out you’ve been stealing money from me you won’t be around to see any of it.” Eric’s eyes widened in fear, lips parted to beg and plea as Price pulled the trigger.

The gunshot was partially muffled, no one would call the police until Price and Simon had fled the scene, giving him ample time to make it home with an alibi. He began to wonder how you were doing, had you been able to eat and take a shower? Maybe you took a bath and soaked in one of the large tubs he had. It was the least he could do, the only thing Price never did was murder women or children, it was against his code. He’d heard about someone else who took anyone down that crossed their path, he refused to be like that.

Goddamn American’s.

“Make sure all our fingerprints are gone before tonight.” Price didn’t wait to see if Simon listened or not before heading down to his car.

His driver was waiting behind the wheel, nodding when Price muttered the word ‘home’. He hadn’t planned on getting messy today, but sometimes things happened that he couldn’t control. It would be less paperwork in the long run, he’d just transfer the money from Eric’s account to one for you. Maybe he could get Kyle to do it, he’d been itching to do something for the last few weeks anyhow.

“We’ve arrived sir.” Alex pulled the car into the garage, knowing better than to open the door for Price.

“Thank you, why don’t you take the rest of the night off? If I need your assistance I’ll call.” Price slipped out of the back of the car and headed inside to look for you.

The sound of two people arguing caught his attention, he could make out Soap’s voice right away, but the other wasn’t one he was quite familiar with. As he turned the corner the picture before him nearly had him laughing. You were standing across from Soap, freshly showered in what looked to be a pair of Soap’s pajamas, arguing about desserts.

“Brownies are clearly the superior choice! You just have horrible taste!” Soap scoffed, rolling his eyes at your bratty attitude.

“Tha’s a lie!” Soap was ready to argue his point on why the chocolate chip cookies were better.

“That’s because you have horrible taste! Even the chef agrees the brownies were better.” You refused to back down, ignoring the way Soap’s chest was heaving.

Price had stopped in the doorway, snickering at the way the two of you were acting like complete children. It was a nice change of pace, and with how his night had gone it was a pleasant surprise to come back to.

“You’re back! I just wanted you to know that your chef is amazing and makes some of the best bolognese I’ve ever had before.” Your stomach was still full, slightly aching with everything you’d eaten.

“Glad to know the food was up to your standards, you settling in alright?” Price kept his hands hidden, knowing his knuckles were bloody and bruised.

“I am, I honestly don’t even know how to thank you for everything.” You were afraid he would still kill you, especially since you’d spent the last hour arguing with his henchman Soap.

He brushed you off, assuring you that you didn’t need to worry about repaying him right then, he could find a way for you to work for him if needed. Maybe you could do the finances, it was an easy enough job for you to do, it would keep you housed and fed as well. You were quite attractive as well, he could take you to any fancy party as his arm candy.

“How well are you with money?” It sounded like such an odd question.

“I worked in finance in the US, so I’m decent.” You didn’t want to say who your employer used to be, lest it cost your life.

“Perfect, you’ll work for me, if that’s alright.” Price raised a brow questioningly.

Your jaw dropped open, nodding quickly to confirm that yes, you would absolutely be alright working for him. It would get you off the streets at least, though working for someone so dangerous was nothing new to you. Maybe you could get an apartment nearby, something that wasn’t infested with termites like your ex's place.

“We’ll get you started tomorrow, the first matter of business is taking you shopping so you can look presentable for meetings.” Wait, you weren’t going to have to be around him 24/7, were you?

“I’m sorry sir, I’d be going to meetings with you?” For some reason the thought unnerved you, what if things backfired and you ended up dead this time?

“Yes, is that going to be a problem?” Price turned to face you, brow raised slightly.

“No, not at all sir.” It was time to keep your mouth shut and do whatever was told, Price was a very dangerous man.

You only had a couple minutes to prepare before Price, along with Soap, were dragging you out to one of the many cars that sat in his garage. Soap would be driving wherever you wanted to go, money not an issue to make sure you would look flawless. Designers were a waste of money, sure having the logo would make heads turn, but thousands for a piece of cloth? Ridiculous.

Price insisted you buy things that at least looked professional, since you seemed to be so against letting him purchase things for you. Soap even tried to interject and get you to agree with Price’s demands, saying it was better not to argue. You wanted to stand your ground and refuse, until you caught sight of a gorgeous dress. There’d be no reason to wear it, but by god did you need to have it at that moment. So you relinquished and gave permission to price to choose things for you, as long as you could get that dress.

He agreed happily, choosing things and letting you find your size so as not to make you uncomfortable. It was nice, knowing that you would be able to get all these new clothes without the stipulation you would need to sleep with him. Your ex would constantly hold gifts and such over your head so you would sleep with him. And yet he’d still had the nerve to cheat and throw you out.

“Awfully quiet sweetheart.” Price turned his head to face you, noticing the way your brow had furrowed.

“Just thinking about the past is all.” You merely shrugged, there was no use in being upset over things you couldn’t change, but it still stung.

“Well, why don’t you tell me about it?” Price had turned to face you fully, attention focused on everything you had to say.

The words turned to ash in your mouth, could you tell him the truth about the type of person you were? How you’d helped someone murder so many innocent people that dared cross his path just by simply existing?

“Do you want the basic rundown, or all the nitty gritty?” You had only ever told one person about your childhood, you’d hoped to never run into him again.

“Everything, spare no detail.” Oh, well this was going to be a long day.

The words slipped out with ease, telling Price everything, from how your father was physically abusive, to how your mother tried to use you for her own benefit. You had run away at fifteen, working odd jobs before you met your old boss at eighteen. He kept you housed, fed, and clothed from when you turned eighteen to a few months shy of when you left entirely. You’d seen things most people who’d gone off to war never dealt with. It was a horrible reminder of how much you’d had to give up just to survive.

“You worked for someone else, someone important..who.” Though it was a question, Price knew exactly who you’d worked for.

“James Barnes, sir.” Your heart was racing, no one except for James, and his right hand woman, Natasha, knew about you.

Price’s expression darkened, causing your heart rate to spike suddenly as you realized how badly you’d fucked up. Would this be the end for you? Having admitted to working for what was essentially his rival?

“How long?” Price could use any information you had on the other man, especially if it meant getting ahead.

“Over ten years, took me in when I was barely eighteen.” It was the truth, you’d basically grown up alongside James.

“And you don’t by any chance know some things that could be useful to me?” It was a loaded question, do you tell him how James had a son he cared so much about. Or how his best friend for over twenty years had cut off all contact after he’d heard of what became of him?

“I’ll tell you everything over dinner.” It was a proposition. You give him information, he gives you anything you could ever ask for.

Soap smirked to himself, pulling down the long road that led to Price’s luxurious home. You would fit in quite nicely with everyone.

Price had everything brought to your room, the closets stuffed full of all your new clothes, shoes, and even the few accessories you picked out. It was nice, knowing you were going to be alright as long as you didn’t step on anyone’s toes. As you made your way down to the kitchen you noticed someone else talking to Price. He was big, arms large enough to crush your skull(though you’d probably thank him). Something about him seemed so familiar though, as if you’d run into him many times before.

“Ready to eat?” Price turned away from the stranger, gesturing to the expansive table.

“I am, thank you so much for all of this, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay you.” You walked over and sat down, if the food was even half as good that lunch was, you would die happy.

Soap and another man you’d never met before walked into the kitchen, taking their own seats alongside the newcomer. The chef brought out the first course, a delicate butternut squash soup with crusty pieces of bread to dop. You nearly moaned at how silky the soup was, making sure not to slurp and disturb anyone else. The bread had a slight bite to it, the crust just hard enough to soak in the buttery goodness without becoming soggy.

“So, what can you tell me?” Price had finished his soup, sipping on the glass of bourbon that had been brought out along with his food.

“James is someone that’s highly feared in most of the states, word spreads like wildfire and they’re all too afraid to say anything bad about him.” You took another bite of the bread, taking a moment to collect your emotions.

“His best friend Steve hasn’t spoken to him since they were teens, he’d found out about James joining the mafia and just disappeared one day.” You’d witnessed the way Steve had torn the other man apart, it was gut wrenching to watch.

You felt bad for James at that moment, he no longer had his family, and now the one person he could rely on was gone as well. Natasha was the closest thing he had to family anymore, and last you knew they were still friends.

“He has a son, named after himself of course, goes by JJ. Last I knew his son was nearly thirteen and was living solely with his dad.” You sighed softly, grabbing your glass of water to take a sip.

“Surprised he had the time to knock someone up.” Soap mumbled into his food, ignoring everything else entirely.

“Johnny, what did we talk about?” Price stared at the other man like a disappointed father.

“No talking shit at dinner.” Soap, or was it Johnny?

You tried to hide your smile, a soft giggle slipping through as you finished your bowl of soup. Soap looked affronted, how dare you laugh at him being scolded by Price as if he was a child, very uncool.

“Before we continue with our conversation, I’d like to introduce Gaz, and Simon.” Price gestured to the two men sitting across from you.

You were shocked that someone as stunning as Gaz was working for him and not as a runway model, he could bring people to tears with his beauty. Simon wasn’t glaring at you per se, more like he was trying to decipher you. There was something about him that made you want to stare back, but you thought better of it and focused your attention back onto Price.

“Nice to meet you both, I met Soap earlier and his horrible taste in snacks.” Gaz couldn’t help but laugh at your statement.

“Thank you! He’s always had the worst taste imaginable.” Gaz was definitely going to become a good friend, you could sense it.

“Shut up!” Soap threw his hands up, arms crossing over his chest with a huff.

“You do mate, it’s all out of love.” Gaz slapped a hand on his shoulder, laughing when Soap rolled his eyes.

The chef brought out the entree before anymore conversation could continue, a beautifully seared filet mignon with roasted fingerling potatoes and caramelized carrots. You wanted to dig in almost instantly, waiting until everyone had their plates before slicing into the meat. It melted like butter on your tongue, washing over your taste buds as if it were made by god himself.

“Alright, as I was saying earlier about James. He’s a very paranoid man, comes with the territory when you’ve slaughtered as many people as he has. So unless you have a reason to do business with him you won’t be able to get close. I’ve watched him murder a man for less before, and that’s the last thing I want to see ever again.” You cut apart one of the potatoes, popping the half into your mouth.

“So, what you’re saying is that if I need to take care of him, we need someone on the inside.” Price had a point, but James would see it coming a million miles away.

“Partially, but James would see that coming a mile away. You want someone he’s close with, a loved one, or a best friend that knows his every move and can get you the information.” You kept your eyes on your plate, not noticing the way all eyes were suddenly on you.

“And, do you know someone that could do this?” Price was asking something dangerous, sure you knew plenty of people that could, and had reason to kill James, but none of them were willing.

“The only man that would ever want to take him out would be Tony Stark, man’s had it out for him since he found out James had his parents murdered.” It had been the final straw that sent you packing.

“Hmm, I’ll have to give him a look see later.” Price dug into his own food, ignoring the way Simon seemed to still be staring at you.

“He’s a dangerous man, nearly had me killed just for walking on his property one day.” You rolled your eyes, stabbing your potato with more force than necessary.

Simon raised a brow, watching how you seemed to become annoyed at even mentioning Tony’s name. Whoever this man was clearly had a vendetta against you, and you as well for him. That’s how this type of world worked, you were either with or against the people you considered the villains. You seemed to fit in so well that Simon couldn’t be bothered to second guess any of it, not when Price welcomed you in with open arms.

“Have to be precautious, comes with the territory darling.” Price merely shrugged, he’d always kept one eye open no matter what, but some people were just paranoid.

“Yeah, I guess. Didn’t make my life any easier when I was trying to get out of New York though, I swear James has men everywhere.” You’d almost been caught twice before finally boarding the plane to safety.

The rest of the meal was quiet, save for the noise of knives and forks gently scraping against the ceramic plates. You were thankful for the silence, giving you the opportunity to think about everything that had happened that day. You’d gone from living on the streets to being housed by one of the most dangerous people in the country. This was definitely a dream, you were going to wake up in the morning and find yourself under that bridge with everyone else. It wasn’t the first time you’d had this dream only to wake up to reality. Though it usually landed you back in the US and not over in London.

“I’ll be in my office if anyone needs me, goodnight.” Price nodded towards everyone before leaving the table.

You weren’t sure if you were allowed to head to bed or not, after the day you’d had your body was begging for sleep. Soap’s clothes, while a little oversized, were definitely going to be comfortable enough to sleep in. Gaz immediately pulled Soap into a conversation, discussing something that sounded like an entirely different language to you at that moment. You gave Simon a quick nod before leaving the table and heading up to your new room. The only light was from the moon, illuminating the room in a soft ethereal glow.

Throwing back the covers on the mattress you crawled into the plush bed, groaning softly at how soft the comforter was. It felt as if you were laying on a cloud, even with the crisp air the blankets were just warm enough to keep you comfortable. Your eyes slipped closed before you could even try and fight them, slipping into dreamland.

Downstairs Soap, Gaz, and Simon were all sitting around the table. Soap had tried to pull Simon into the conversation only to be shot down immediately. Simon couldn’t explain it, but something about you drew him in. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt this way, always pushing away the prospect of dating as if it was a deadly disease. Soap would catch on to his sudden fixation on you, man was like a bloodhound when it came to women. The very last thing that Simon wanted, or needed, was Soap getting on his ass about you. He couldn’t get a proper read on you, there was something you weren’t telling everyone. And Simon was determined to find out every tiny thing.

Meanwhile in New York

James was angry, nearly panting as he paced the foyer of his penthouse. How the hell had you managed to slip through his fingers so easily? He’d had eyes on you for so long, and yet you’d managed to get to fucking England. Natasha had been the one to break the news to him, stance stoic as the words sunk into his bones. You were gone, and now there was a high chance that you’d managed to get yourself killed. James knew all about Price and his little minions, the fucker was slowly taking control of more countries.

“We need to locate her, now.” James kept his back to Natasha, the only person he ever trusted.

“I’ve reached out to my informants, they’re scouring every nook and cranny to find her. Last we knew her boyfriend was killed.” Shit, if they’d gotten to someone you were dating, you were definitely next.

“You mean that little shit convinced her to leave, and someone got to him before me?” James’ tone was deadly, venom lacing each word.

“It appears so, they’re claiming his death was a suicide, but the autopsy showed facial wounds caused by something small but sharp.” Natasha had seen the photos, it was pretty clear what had caused the superficial wounds.

He sighed softly, stepping away from the floor to ceiling windows to fully face Natasha who was watching him closely. James was the type of man to take out anyone that stood in his way of something he wanted. She could never figure out why James seemed to be so infatuated with you when you’d never shown any interest. You were friendly with him of course, but there had never been romantic feelings. Had he been trying to replace Steve’s friendship with you? It was the only thing that made any sense.

“Why don’t we make a quick little trip across the pond, there’s some people I’ve needed to visit anyway.” James smirked, reaching up to slick back his hair gently.

“I’ll call Scott and make sure the plane is ready in the morning.” Natasha turned away from him, pulling out her phone to make a quick call.

Who in the world did James know that lived over in England? The last she’d heard about that was when she’d had someone killed in their apartment for stealing money. Her phone pinged with a new message, a name she’d never expected to see again flashing before her.

Steve Rogers: We need to talk.

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fuck-customers · 8 months

Note

Perfect example of why customer service is a pox on this world and why I hate my fucking job. Sorry this is so long, tried to condense as much as I could.

Guy comes to collect his food, points to the sauces with it and goes "That's it?" Ye. "I want another;" Okie dokie. Take it out to him, he looks pissed, "Seriously? That's all you're gonna give me just one?" We have a policy wherein if customers want extra sauce they have to pay like 10 cents. I explain this to him and say he can have this one extra sauce on the downlow or he can pay for as many as he wants. He sneers and walks away; interaction over right?

WRONG. He comes back later to ask for a takeaway container. I try to be really nice to customers who've been dicks just to make them feel stupid, so I know I did nothing to provoke this when responding by asking what size he'd like: small or large. This guy. This motherfucking guy decided to snark back with "I don't know why don't you be smart and show me the fucking containers?"

I go out back grab both sizes and in a pretty condescending tone go, "Here you go, small or large?"

"Are you serious, was it really that hard to do that? You could've done that the first time without the fucking attitude. Be smart next time."

"Haha k mate, what size container do you want?"

"You know what? I'm gonna go out there and find a manager, I'm gonna report you. You've got a real bad attitude, if you don't wanna be here don't fucking show up."

"Oh you want to report me to my ~manager~? I can call him for you right now! Do you want me to do that sir?"

"Yeah go on, fucking call them! They're gonna look on the cameras and see how you treated me." (He thought the cameras recorded audio, they do not, unfortunatly for me in this instance)

This whole time I haven't raised my voice once even tho he's yelling at me, I'm just keeping that overly saccharine sweet 'you're a moron and I'm patronising you' customer service voice and smile.

Ring my DM and he says he'll be over in five, I relay this to dickhead and he slinks back to the bar to wait.

I go out the back to cool off for 5 then head back out front and resume cleaning. Guess who storms back up to the register in the third part of this shitty trilogy.

"Oh so you're fucking cleaning now are you? Now that you know your manager is coming and you're on camera you're doing your job huh?" (I'm not even exaggerating the swearing, this dude dropped the F bomb almost every single sentence)

"Beg your pardon? I've been cleaning-"

"Yeah bullshit, you just want to look like you're actually working you lazy dog. I know what you're doing."

"Yeah keep talking to me like that and you're getting kicked out the front door!"

Managers showed up at that point and dude was being a dick to them too.

Cherry on top of this whole ordeal? His wife/mother/whoever the hell she was comes up and asks for a container while guy is off to her side arguing with DMs. Me being kinda a dick knowing he's listening/watching go back to default nice customer service attitude infront of him and repeat the same question: small or large? Intentionally neglecting to get the containers in a moment of pettiness. To her credit she did politely ask to see them but when I bring em out has the audacity to say: "See? If you had've just done that the first time he wouldn't have had to react like he did."

No. You. Did. Fucking. Not.

"Actually no, he was the one who decided to make a smart comment first."

"Well if you had've just brought the containers out to begin with-"

"And what stopped him from just asking politely instead of being smart about it?"

"You should've just brought the containers out, then he wouldn't have had to react the way he did."

"He didn't have to react the way he did regardless, he could've just asked me decently and there was no reason to swear at an name call me." At this point I said fuck this and walked off.

Apparently guy made remarks after this to DMs about what he'd 'do to me' if I did that to him again. So if this unhinged motherfucker comes back and reads my body language wrong I could be in shit apparently?? Okay psycho.

Trying to tell my managers to ban him but they're saying unfortunately he'd have to do more then that to be banned so it's off the table atm but they'll review it. They're semi-regulars too so this most likely won't be my last run in with this moron

This is very specific and if, for whatever snowflakes chance in hell, the people who this is about see it and realise this is them and I'm that employee: you're a bunch of dogs with no manners who should stay the fuck home. You've got issues that clearly need sorting out and if you're gonna flip over one fucking takeaway container then stay out of the public thanks.

Posted by admin Rodney.

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tteokdoroki · 2 years

Text

— LOVING YOU IS EASY. + katsuki bakugou.

↳ warnings: unrequited love, angst, no happy ending. bakugou is oblivious to his best friend being in love with him, reader is stupid. this is word vomit and not proof read sorry, gn!reader.

“who the fuck orders pineapple on pizza?”

you look up from your position cross legged on the floor to your best friend of nearly twenty years— and smile, widely, brightly as if the sun as filtered in and taken residence across your features. katsuki scowls, having unearthed your ghastly pizza from the boxes of snacks you have scattered across your living room floor, which looks to be in a similar state to your childhood bedroom whenever katsuki slept over when you were kids.

you’ve known bakugou from the moment you were put into diapers— your mothers had met at a summer camp when they were nine and had been best friends ever since. bakugou had taken his first steps after yours, there were photos of you taking baths together and he’d knocked your first tooth out in your backyard the first summer of primary school.

you were best friends before you were even old enough to know what those words meant, and you suppose you’ve been in love with bakugou for twice as long. you’ve got no clue as to how he hasn’t seen it yet, how he hasn’t managed to catch on to the little kid that still trails behind him after all this time— wanting to be called pretty by the boy they like so much.

“i do! it’s good!” you snatch the box away from the blonde, pretending not to swoon over the familiar quirk in his brow from where he’s questioning your actions. it’s been so long since you’ve seen katsuki, he’s busy rushing around the city with hero work as a rising pro and you’re cooped up in your college dorm with stacks upon stacks of books. it kills you to spend a little less time with him, so see him comfortable and stress free from the woes of his job… but then again you’re one of the few people who katsuki has let close enough to see him so ordinary.

he’s ordinarily beautiful.

and you’re so lucky to get to see katsuki like this, a lose shirt hanging from his well built frame instead of the tightness of his hero uniform— eyes relaxed and gleaming under yellow light and not blood thirsty, a content smile on his face while he eats instead of him bearing his fans to paparazzi. here, in your tiny space, he’s kats instead of dynamight. he’s yours and not the rest of the world’s.

“well except for you, yer a fuckin’ weirdo.” bakugou claims, sliding up next to you to pick a movie— not before grimacing at your taste in food. “fruit on pizza, yer crazy, yanno that?” you scoff and he pushes your head playfully in response, going back to scrolling through the shitty moves on the Netflix romcom selection.

pushing his harm back, you tell bakugou. “tomato is a fruit too, who’s the weirdo for liking fruit sauce on their pizza now?”

“shuddap, moron. miss me with that science bullshit,” and then he smiles at you, teeth showing, eyes warm enough to make your icy heart flutter.

and you realise then, with your heart leaping into your throat— that you don’t want to share katsuki with the rest of the world. you’ve hated doing it so far; ever since he decided to become some big hot shot— you’ve despised it. because everyone gets to take a look at how pretty he is when he’s just being him, everyone gets a slice when you’ve known katsuki from the very beginning.

it’s not fair how you’ve always loved katsuki; and now everyone else is in love with him too. you know that he wouldn’t just fall for anyone, that they’d need to be worthy and prove themselves— but if that were the case, it meant katsuki didn’t see you as worth risking it all either. or he’d have realised by now. seen how much you’ve adored him from the time you could talk.

you don’t think you’re deserving of his love anyways, and he won’t want yours if you don’t believe it either.

so you love him, in this little room when bakugou has the time to drop by and spend his moments with you like he used to when you were both two teenagers with a dumb dream you didn’t know would take you in two directions.

you love the gleam in his eyes and the caution in which he moves, the gentleness of his actions and how he treats you like you’re made of glass despite being the loudest and most brash person you know. you love his silence though, and how it’s comfortable when you sit in it together like now, you love his passion and his drive and you love katsuki bakugou.

you love katsuki bakugou as a whole and not the half the media makes you see.

“oi, idiot,” katsuki grumbles, stealing a slice from your Hawaiian style pizza. “you wanna watch clueless again?” he frowns at your staring; at you taking in his beauty so selfishly like it’s something to be treasured— like it’s a solar eclipse you only see one every couple of years. bakugou waves a hand in front of your face. “oi! what’cha lookin’ at?”

snapping out of your thoughts, you lean forward and let the tip of your ring finger graze just under his right eye and against his cheek— ignoring how your best friend is soft to the touch, pretending that it doesn’t make your heart ache. “you have…” you stutter, eyes locked on his and you don’t have the strength to keep looking before you break contact. “you had a lash on your face… make a wish.”

“nah, toss it. that shit’s for babies,” katsuki dismisses with a wave of his hand. “you have thirty seconds t’change my mind or ‘m puttin’ on clueless.”

but you make the wish instead.

wishing you could have loved anyone else, aside from your best friend.

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