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remusluvr · 10 months

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words i used | sirius black

summary: Sirius learns the consequences of treating people he loves bad. content: angst, fighting, crying, one use of y/n note: part 2 - do i wanna know? (sirius black)

You knew from the beginning that this relationship was not one made to last. Sirius wasn't the relationship type. Yet, you let yourself get excited anyway. You let yourself get excited over when he'd hold your hand in the hallway, and sit next to you during meals, and go out of his way to hang out with you when there were other things he could be doing.

But with excitement comes disappointment. Disappointment when you see him flirting with another girl in the hallway or when you'd catch him hanging out with his friends while you were supposed to be together. There was always a counteract that threw you off. Did you mean anything to him?

The final straw was seeing him pressing some sixth-year against the wall during a party, lips attached to hers. It's like any and all hope was drained from your body, leaving you feeling unusually empty. Even walking out of the common room was a feat.

And the trek to find somewhere private was even harder of a journey. Slinking down against some wall in some abandoned hallway, you can't fight off the burning feeling in your throat anymore. You bring your knees to your chest and cry. He was never yours but you really hoped that maybe one day he could be.

It hurts too much to put any more effort into the dead-end of your relationship. By the time you finally will yourself to pull things together, your eyes are puffy and red. You don't want anyone to know. It's embarrassing. Especially when everyone had warned you not to get your hopes up but you brushed them off, blinded by the boy.

Sometimes, you'd have sleepovers where he would hold you close and run his fingers through your hair whilst you talked quietly. He would tell you how much he liked you and wanted to be with you. But it was never real. Just another check on his never-ending journey to make out with every girl in school.

It feels like a completely different world when you wake up the next morning. You wouldn't say that the world is brighter or duller, just different. It's like you have been forced to finally open your eyes and see things for how they are.

Breakfast is the first noticeable change. He comes in late, taking his unassigned-assigned seat next to you.

"Good morning," he smiles, plucking a piece of toast from the pile. You hum from your position next to him, not turning to look at him. You chew on your lip and he swats at it like usual, telling you to knock it off but you can't. You can't be around him.

If the bench below you was able to move, it would be halfway across the room with the way you stood up so abruptly.

"What's wrong?"

"I just, god-" you cut yourself off. He doesn't deserve an explanation so you storm out, leaving him even more confused. Sirius wants to follow and beg you to tell him why you're upset with him but he's never seen you this way before. He's not sure what you need him to do, if you need him at all.

He's sure that something is very wrong when you don't show up to class, one that you sit together in. Racking his brain, he's trying to figure out exactly what caused you to turn so cold to him out of nowhere. There's not much work being done in McGonagall's today as the only thing on his parchment is a list of things that could've upset you.

You're hidden away in a secret alcove that Sirius had shown you. Maybe it's not the best place to go when you're trying to get over him but it's the only place you know that the teachers won't be able to find you. This used to be one of your favorite places to go. Sometimes you and Sirius would sneak off here to make out at random times throughout the school day.

The memory of his hands tangling themselves into your hair as he pulls you closer onto his lap floods your mind. It's cruel. He was never officially yours but for a little while you could have your fantasy that he was.

Sirius isn't stupid, maybe it takes him a little longer to come to conclusions on things but he's not an idiot. Well, not a total idiot. His list of things he's written just keeps going and even if he can't pinpoint the exact reason for why you're mad at him, he has several that showcase how bad of a friend he is. He makes it his mission to fix whatever is wrong.

"(Y/N)-" he starts when he sees you passing by in the hallway. You glance over with a thin, tight-lipped smile on your face as he gets cut off.

"Sirius! I had fun last night, I was thinking that maybe we could go to Hogsmeade together this weekend?" a random girl interrupts, driving the knife further into your heart. His face and your face fall as he turns to the girl.

"Oh, uh no," he states rather bluntly, following after your figure with his eyes before trying to catch up with you. He has to shove through the crowded hallway so that he doesn't lose you.

And when he finally does catch up to you, he grabs your shoulder and pulls you off to the side. Your breathing is heavier than usual and he realizes you were really trying to get away from him.

"What?" you grit, anger evident in your voice. You're blinking more than usual to try and keep the tears from falling and he's not sure what to say. "Don't you have better things to do with your time? Things that don't involve leading me on and then making out with someone else?"

"I'm sorry," is the only thing he comes up with. You laugh at him because that's all he can say. He looks like a hurt puppy as you rub your hands over your eyes. He doesn't get to be the hurt one in this situation.

"I tried, Sirius. I don't understand what else I can do to make you like me. Do any of those girls mean anything to you? Was I just one of them?" you spit. His gaze is fixed on the ground and you know you'll never get anywhere. He doesn't care. "I can't be around you anymore. I can't look at you."

"Please," he mumbles, "I'm so sorry. I don't know why I act like this. I like you so much. I shouldn't have made out with her or anyone else when I knew all I want is you. It's like I only know how to ruin things for myself."

"D-don't turn yourself into the victim here. That's not fair. You hurt me and you're trying to make me feel bad for you. It's not hard to not make me look like a fool. All you had to do was not go after other girls. Did you think I never noticed until now? Maybe I didn't see all of them but I saw too many for it to be a one-off thing."

"I'm sorry, really. I want to be with you but that scares me. Will you please give me a chance to show you how much you mean to me? I want you to be my girlfriend."

It's the words you want to hear but the circumstance is wrong. Why couldn't he have realized this before? Why did he have to make you feel so shitty?

"I can't, Sirius. None of your words mean anything to me when you go and do the opposite almost immediately. I know you'll make someone really happy one day, but it won't be me. I can't put myself through this again."

"No, please. Let me prove it to you," his words fall on deaf ears as you walk away. Staying any longer would just increase his chances of you saying 'yes.' And he doesn't get to recover that easily. Your hands are shaking and your body aches. "Please."

part 2 - do i wanna know? (sirius black)

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melodramaschild · 1 year

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“Was I just a fucking bet?!” You raise your voice and throw your hands around yourself.

Sirius gaps, swallowing his pride as he looks into your eyes. “I promise that I didn’t mean t-”

“Yes or no?” You’re calm. “Am I a bet, yes or no.”

“Yes. Yes, you are.” Sirius is disappointed with himself. He outstretches his hands to reach out for you. To grasps onto your arms and hold you close to him so he could explain everything to you.

But you just eye him, not moving, not blinking. Only eyeing him like you’re a robot who sees a human for the first time.

He expects you to cry and scream, to hit him and to curse him. But you only nod. “Alright,” you hum, not a single tear forming in your eyes.

Before he can say anything you interrupt him. “Goodbye, Sirius.” You say with a stern voice as you turn around on your heel, leaving Sirius standing in the middle of the night with your favourite flowers in his arms.

He watches you as you leave, as your long dress is swimming behind you and how you walk, slowly, bravely… tensely.

He turns to his friends, shaking his head. He drops the flowers on the cold street and runs to you. “Y/n! Y/n! Wait please!” his voice is cutting through the dense night.

But you’re already gone and he can’t find you in the streets.

#robies dialogues #sirius black #sirius black x reader angst #sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black x you angst #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x y/n angst

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strawberrysodaslut · 2 years

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Brother’s Best Friend - Sirius Black x Potter!Reader

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[ masterlist ] [ 30 day challenge ]

❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

word count: 2.8k

warnings: smut, 18+ MDNI, sirius being hot, oral (fem reviving) titty worshiping, fingering, unprotected sex (this is fiction, your sex life isnt, wrap it before you tap it) slight hand job if you squint (lmk if there are any more)

summary: being the younger sister of James Potter was tough, you never knew who was friends with you for you or to know the marauders. But Sirius always made you feel safe, and on your graduation night, you finally let eachother know exactly where you stand.

a/n: day 3 of my writing challenge, first time posting ANY of my smut, i hope you enjoy!

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Having James Potter as your brother was a whole other experience. As much as you loved him, sometimes you wished he wasn’t your brother just from how the other students treated you because of him.

You’d lost count of the number of girls who pretended to be your friend just to get to one of the marauders. Once they realised you were not a pathway to getting in their beds, they’d ditch you.

You were close with Remus and you were friendly with Peter, but Sirius and you had a bond that you didn’t have with the others.

It all started in your third year. Your brother and his friends were the year ahead of you, so you didn’t share any classes, but you hung out around them long enough to know how closed off Sirius was about his home life. Rarely mentioning his family when you were around.

That all ended when you found him crying in the common room in front of the fireplace, you made the decision to sit next to him. You didn’t hold him, neither of you spoke a word to each other. You just rested your hand on his shoulder as he sobbed.

That night shifted your relationship with Sirius completely. Instead of you being “James’s younger sister” you had become someone Sirius often went to for comfort when he needed it, and he was always there when you needed comfort from him.

In your fifth year, you started dating your first boyfriend. It was fine for the first couple of weeks, but eventually, he tried to pressure you into going further than you were comfortable with. Once you’d made your boundaries clear, he dumped you.

Sirius found you sobbing where your now ex-boyfriend left you, he’d never felt angrier in his life. Holding you, seeing you cry over a guy who never deserved you. No one had to ask how the boy got a black eye the next day.

When Sirius moved in with your family, you couldn’t help but develop a school girl crush on him. Every time he’d sneak into your room at night to talk to you about his plans to prank Snape, you wished he’d just stay with you all night. But every time he went back to his shared room with James, you knew all you would be was James’ little sister.

You and Sirius remained friends even after he graduated, constantly writing to each other about your days. As much as you loved your friends at Hogwarts, you missed the marauders so much, especially Sirius.

The boys swore to you and your brother that they’d be there for your graduation, and they followed through on that promise. You were shocked when you saw Sirius after the ceremony, he was always attractive, but you really noticed it this time.

He’d let his beard grow out and he cut his hair short. You were sad when he told you that, you loved his long hair. But the story of James putting charmed gum in his hair still made you giggle.

“Hey, bug!” He said, picking you up and spinning you around like he always used to do. “I missed you so much.”

You giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck. Although he looked so different, he smelt just like he always did. “Missed you too.” You mutter shyly as he puts you down.

He furrows his brows, “You okay?”

Shit, you think. He can’t know the thoughts that are running through your head. He’s James’ best friend, he always has been. You shook the thoughts out of your head. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Your parents take all of you out to dinner at a muggle diner. Sirius pulls out the seat for you to sit next to him, you smile, sitting in the chair.

You struggle to behave normally around Sirius, all the feelings you had when you were younger coming back- with a new angle. All you want is to drag him to the nearest bathroom and fuck him then and there- what the hell is wrong with you? This is James’ best friend! You need to calm down, You think to yourself.

But when Sirius notices your weird demeanour, he places his hand on your thigh, rubbing soothing circles with his thumb. You look up at him, and he sends you a soft smile, raising his eyebrows as if to ask “Is this okay?”

You nod, relaxing into his touch and settling in for the dinner. But as the night goes on, Sirius’s hand seems to drift… higher? You’re convinced that you’re just making it up, it feels like it’s going higher because you’re focusing on his hand. That was your line of thinking until his thumb brushed just under your skirt.

Your breath hitches when you realise that he’s doing it on purpose. Nervous arousal fills your stomach as he slowly shifts his hand under your skirt, stopping once his hand is covered by it.

He left his hand there for the rest of the night. When it was time for you to leave, he gave your upper thigh one final time before slipping his hand out from your skirt.

Although Sirius and Remus shared a place and James had his own house with Lily, they all decided to stay with you and your parents for the night- for old time's sake.

You were exhausted from the day, and still reeling from whatever the fuck happened with Sirius, so you excused yourself to bed. You were lying in your bed for hours, staring at the ceiling, unable to get to sleep.

Eventually, there was a knock at your door. “Come in.” You whisper, confused as to who it could be.

Sirius emerges from the doorway, that famous smirk plastered on his face. “I thought if we’re ‘reliving the old times, I may as well sneak in here again,” he says, walking into your room.

You smile at him, feeling relieved about having a friend here with you.

His face shifted to something… worrisome. He gulps before sitting on your bed, “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier today,” he says, hand reaching for your ankle.

You look up at him, “No, you didn’t, it's fine.” You say, moving slightly closer to him.

He takes a shuddered breath, his face relaxing, “Good, I was worried I crossed a line. It’s just- I haven’t seen you in so long and you look… just- wow.” He says, looking you up and down.

A smile plasters itself on your face, feeling warm at his compliment, “I was thinking the same, you’re also very- wow.” You say, giggling.

Sirius’ hand comes up to graze your face, you lean into his touch, “I missed you so much bug,” He says, shifting so the two of you were sharing breath.

You think to yourself, debating on whether you should say what popped into your head, but it’s now or never, “Show me.”

He groans, pushing his lips into yours, you immediately reciprocate the kiss. Carding your hands through his hair as he rests his hands on your waist. The kiss is fast, heated, chasing the passion and pleasure you’ve desired for so long.

Sirius breaks the kiss and moves across your jaw down to your neck, finding your sweet spot and biting to suck a bruise. You let out a soft moan, tugging on his hair. He groans, sending vibrations down your body.

You're guided to lie down on your back, you spread your knees to give him room and he slots in between them, grinding down onto you. You moan into his ear, causing him to sit up and fiddle with his jacket pocket.

You look at him, “You okay? Did I do something wrong?“ You ask.

Sirius turns back to you, eyebrows furrowed. He leans down and places a chaste kiss on your lips. “No baby, you’re doing perfect.” He sits back up, “Just getting… this.” He pulls his wand out of his pocket.

He casts the muffilato charm, tossing his jacket and his wand off the bed to come back down to you.

Sirius returns to the place he was before, rolling his hips into yours as he pushes back into the kiss. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer.

He moves his hand to tug on the hem of your shirt, asking for permission to take it off. Your nerves hit your body, but you bite them back to lift your body to help him pull it off you.

He leans back to take you in, letting out a shuddered breath, “Fuck, baby you’re beautiful.” He leans back in to kiss your collarbone, moving further down to take your nipple in his mouth.

“Fuck Siri,” you moan out.

He hums, the vibration making the stimulation all the more pleasurable as he rolls your nipple in between his teeth.

You buck your hips into Sirius’, eliciting a moan from him. You tug at his shirt to pull it over his head, he releases his mouth from your breast to let you. You look down his torso, you knew he had abs, but fuck- man’s got abs.

He plays with the strings of your sweatpants, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips, “Is this okay?” He asks.

You nod, lifting your hips to let him pull your sweatpants off of you. You go to pull down your panties, but he stops you. Looking up at him, you furrow your brows.

He presses a kiss to your lips, then your cheek, then along your jaw, neck, collarbone. He presses one kiss to each breast, then down your stomach to the waistband of your panties, biting the elastic and dragging the fabric down your body.

You giggle, trying to cover up how much that turned you on, but since he can see the wet patch in the panties he just pulled off of you, it’s probably no use.

He kisses up your thighs, leading up to press a lingering kiss to your pussy lips. You buck your lips into his mouth. He lets out a laugh, “So needy,” he says. “What’d you want baby?”

You lean on your elbows, Sirius already looked fucked out. His face is red, his hair is a beautiful mess, his lips are swollen, you don’t want to think about how far gone you look right now.

Sirius goes back to pressing kisses into your thighs, “Please- please touch me Siri.” you mewl.

He smiles, immediately diving into your pussy. He licks a long stripe from your slick to your clit, causing you to let a loud moan out. He sucks on your clit while he toys at your entrance with his middle finger, shallowly pushing it in.

Desperate for more stimulation, you roll your hips into his mouth, he pulls back completely. “Are we gonna behave?” He asks, rubbing your thighs with his hand. You nod, needy for him to let you return to the ecstasy you were experiencing.

He hums, leaning back in. Immediately pushing two fingers into you and curling them. You let out a loud moan, gripping your sheets with one hand and carding the other through his hair.

He laps at your clit as he searches for your sweet spot. Fuck- this guy knows what he’s doing. Not that the fact is that surprising… you heard all the rumours, and adulthood seemed to leave him even more experienced.

When he finally hits your spot, a guttural moan escapes you. “There she is…” he murmurs, the vibrations only adding to your pleasure.

You can feel that coil in your abdomen, Sirius knows it too, your moans and breathless praises only encouraging him to go harder. He continues to hit that spot inside you until you’re a sobbing mess, the coil about to snap.

“Come on baby,” he praises, sinking a third finger into you, “Cum on my fingers.”

You release at his words, your orgasm so strong you think you’re gonna black out. You ride on his mouth and fingers until you’re on the brink of overstimulation, but when you stop- he only keeps on going.

“Siri-Siri…” you warn, “please,”

He chuckles, pulling his fingers out of you and resting his head on your thigh. You try to ignore the fact that his face is wet. He presses a few kisses to your thigh.

With how pleased he looks, you would’ve thought he was the one who just got head. You let out a breathy exhale, still coming down from your high.

“You okay?” He asks.

You nod, breathless. “That was fucking amazing- holy shit.”

He smiles, crawling up to kiss you. It’s strange to taste yourself on his mouth, but you kind of like it. You toy with the waistband of his sweatpants while the two of you lazily make out. He smiles into the kiss, moving to help you pull his sweatpants off.

Well… the grey sweatpants did him justice. You were intimidated by his length, leaning forward to stroke his cock. He moans into your lips, rolling his hips into your hand.

He shifts, gripping his cock out of your hand. Pushing your legs out to get a better angle, and lines up with your entrance.

“Ready?” He asks. You nod, but he tuts, shaking his head and going in for another kiss. “… words, bug…”

You whine, “Yes… yes please.”

He smiles, pushing in, his mouth immediately contorts. You grip at his arms, overwhelmed by the pleasure, barely feeling the burn because of how well he prepped you.

“Fuck baby, you’re so tight.” He moans.

He slowly bottoms out, looking at you for any sign of discomfort. You meet his eyes, pulling him down for a kiss. He puts his hand on your cheek. Pulling back to look at you with raised eyebrows, you nod, and he starts to roll his hips into yours.

“F-fuck.” You moan as he pulls out nearly completely, immediately thrusting back in.

He groans as he continues to bottom out in you, “Shit baby, taking me so well.”

His thrusts grow faster and deeper, gripping your breasts and kissing down your neck, biting another bruise.

You’re not sure if the muffling curse will be enough to cover the moans you let out. Sirius continues to mutter praises as he thrusts in you, his moans sounding pornographic.

His hand slides down your body to rub your clit, a gasp escapes you. You card your hands through his hair, tugging at the short strands. He moans, pushing his mouth against yours, messily kissing as he swallows your endless moans.

His cock hits your same sweet spot, your eyes roll to the back of your head. He groans as your walls clasp around him. “Fuck baby,” he says in between kisses, picking up his pace.

You can feel his pace get sloppier as the coil in your abdomen returns. You pull from the kiss, “Cum in me Siri, please.” You beg, your body just about to fall into your high.

He buries his face in your neck, “Please cum baby, it’ll feel so good when you cum.” He begs, rutting his hips into yours.

The coil snaps and your high washes over you, you’re so far gone you don’t even notice that he’s cumming until you feel the warmth fill your abdomen. Sirius slows down, picking a pace to fuck you both through your highs.

Eventually, he comes to a stop, collapsing on top of you, burying your face into his neck. You brush the hair on the back of his head, kissing his cheek. “You okay?” you ask.

He nods, “Fuck, you’re amazing, you know that right?” He says, voice muffled and tickling your neck.

You laugh, you just lied there while he ravaged you, and you’re the one being praised. You pull his head up, leaning forward to kiss him.

He groans, pulling out of you to lie next to him. “James is gonna fucking kill me if he finds out,” he pulls you into his chest, and you relax in his hold.

“Nah,” You smile, “I’ll beat him up if he tries.”

He kisses your forehead, “Y'know you just made like… sixteen-year-old Sirius’s dream come true.” He jokes.

You roll over to face him. “You liked me back then?”

He smiles, “I’ve liked you since then,” you start giggling, “what?” he asks.

“That was when I started liking you.” You say in between laughs.

He strokes your back with his thumb, you’re telling me we could’ve been doing this the whole time?”

You nod, a playful smile on your face.

He mirrors your smile, “Guess we gotta make up for lost time.”

❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

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ellecdc · 2 months

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Hi gorggg can i request an angst wolfstar fic where reader is kind of insecure of her placement within their relationship? like they’re both so close already and she’s a new addition so she kinda just feels out of place.

thank you for your amazing writing!! doing the world a favor❤️❤️❤️

Hey babes! Thanks SO much for the request 'cause truly, this is my shit. Now, I have to admit that I'm obsessed with these fics that have the same vibe by moonstruckme (poly!marauders) and super-clearlysaltybouquet (poly!wolfstar), so really, they're the blueprints/inspiration for this piece

also...I'm a whore for hurt/comfort. But you asked for ANGST...so I've given you only angst and no comfort. If you want comfort, you'll have to ask for a part two 💖 hope you love it!!! UPDATE: part two is here.

poly!wolfstar x fem!reader

CW: insecurities in relationship, feeling out of place, angst, hurt no comfort

It felt silly, really, to feel as sad as you did. You were currently sitting with two boys who you’ve been basically in love with for so long - two boys who have proclaimed to feel the same way about you - and on the outside you were sure this looked like a really lovely moment.

It just didn’t feel very lovely.

You didn’t think your discontentedness stemmed from anything the boys had done in particular, but even seeing the way they instinctively leaned closer to one another when anyone else approached the three of you left you feeling like an outsider looking in.

Maybe you were overthinking things. Maybe this was just your insecurities showing.

Or maybe…maybe…the three of you had made a mistake.

Maybe you weren’t cut out for polyamory; it certainly wasn’t for the weak, and it certainly wasn’t easy being the newest addition to the relationship.

You felt lost in most conversations, missing key information that inside jokes, years of friendship, and living together in the same tower - the same dorm room – led to. It felt as though they were fluent in a language you were only starting to pick up, and you didn’t want them to have to slow down for your sake. You didn’t want one of them to have to play the role of translator just for your benefit.

But then, why were you here?

You weren’t calm, relaxed, and witty like Remus. And you weren’t funny, exciting, and energetic like Sirius. They seemed to already balance each other out perfectly; maybe that’s why it felt so easy to fall into the role of a background character in your own relationship.

There was a brief ‘honeymoon’ period to your relationship; a time of public proclamations, handholding and PDA, dates, and spending every moment the three of you could together.

It was exciting.

And then it was less exciting – not to you, never to you - but it seemed to be that way for them.

Suddenly, it was dates and then them returning to their dorm – back home – without you. It was silent conversations with nothing but a look between the two of them that didn’t include you in the slightest. It was professors announcing partner projects, and them pairing together immediately which was fine, you told yourself, because you always partnered with Shelby anyway and that’s the way it had always been before.

Before.

This is the way it had always been before.

So, what were you doing here, exactly? What were you doing sitting on a blanket near the Black Lake with a book in your hand, while Sirius’ hand gripped around your ankle gently as Remus played with Sirius’ hair from where his head was laying in his lap, whilst Sirius and Remus talked about pranks, something funny that James said, and setting Peter up with some Hufflepuff girl?

You could tell you were being insecure… that you were overthinking this. You could tell you were being unreasonable because every so often, Sirius’ hand wouldn’t just be resting around your ankle, but he would squeeze it gently or rub his thumb across your Achilles tendon as if to convince himself that you were still here; still real. And every so often, Remus would move his gaze from where it laid on his own book or away from Sirius whom he was speaking with to look at you… check on you… confirm you were still there; still okay.

They cared. They had to, right? Cared that you were here? They wouldn’t have asked you otherwise, surely. They wouldn’t be making the effort to keep a hand on you, or their eyes on you. Surely, they would never have decided to open their relationship to include you in it.

But there it was…the truth.

It was their relationship. And they’d opened it up for you.

It should be the second part of that sentence that spoke to you the most, but in your mind and insecurities, the second seemed like the whole truth.

This was their relationship.

You shouldn’t be here.

“You still with us, dove?” Remus asked gently, distracting you from your musings. You suddenly realized that your book you were holding had fallen limply into your lap and you were staring unseeingly at the Black Lake. The boys had apparently paused their conversation to look at you, and Sirius’ thumb continued its tender caressing of the soft of your joint.

“Yeah.” You said, but it came out scratchy. You cleared your throat and tried again. “Yeah, sorry, I must have zoned out for a second.”

Sirius wiggled your ankle. “Daydreaming again, huh? About us I bet.” He teased with a wink.

You wiggled your ankle back at him as he leaned his head up from Remus’ lap, lips puckered in an ask (a demand) for a kiss.

This may be fleeting, so who were you to deny him?

You leaned forward on one hand, the other still holding your book, and pressed a kiss to the black-haired boy’s lips. He smiled into it and let you go all too willingly as you leaned back and tried to focus on your book.

The air around you began to feel heavy before the sound of distant thunder permeated your hearing.

“Damn, I guess Scottish weather isn’t very reliable, hm?” Remus said as he began packing up his things.

“It’s too bad.” Sirius murmured as he began to stand. “I was having a nice time out here with you two.”

You smiled back at him as he extended a hand to help you up.

“We’re still on for a study date tomorrow after dinner, right?” He asked you when you were at your full height.

“Yeah, sure. If you guys will have me.” You responded shyly, hating that you even hinted at any of your insecurities.

Sirius scoffed in response, but it was Remus who answered. “’Course we do, dove. We’re looking forward to it.”

You felt like you should be a little embarrassed at the way your heart fluttered hopefully at the sentiment, but you focused instead on Sirius’ smile and Remus’ soft eyes as the three of you made your way back to the castle.

You hadn’t seen the boys at all today. You unfortunately slept through your alarm, making you miss breakfast completely; generally, you’d sit with Sirius, Remus, and their friends at the Gryffindor table. The two of them were no shows for lunch, so you opted to sit with Shelby instead. And it was Friday, and on Friday’s you didn’t share any classes with them, meaning by the time you made it to dinner, you’d not seen or heard from them at all.

“Hey James.” You commented as you headed towards James, Lily, and Regulus sitting at the Slytherin table. “Have you seen Rem or Sirius at all today?” Of course, you knew that he had, he lived with them.

James seemed to grimace slightly, but the expression was fleeting before he was smiling at you again.

He knew something you didn’t.

“The last I heard they were talking about your study date tonight.” He offered. You could tell he was putting on an extra show of enthusiasm for your benefit. You tried to be grateful for it, but it left a sour taste in your mouth, nonetheless.

“Okay, thank you.” You said as you turned to head to find a seat with Shelby.

“Oh, Y/N.” Lily called after you. “You’re welcome to sit with us, if you’d like?”

You grinned gratefully at Lily as she smiled kindly at you, even though your heart clenched on account of the clearly pitying offer. Was it as obvious to everyone else as it was to you that you were so out of place with Remus and Sirius? Could they all see it too?

“That’s alright. I’ll see you guys tomorrow!” You called as you walked away.

The boys weren’t avoiding you, were they? Surely, they would have said something to you if there was a problem.

Although, perhaps they wouldn’t, seeing as you had clearly been spiraling for some time now and have yet to discuss it with them.

Would they even meet you in the library later? Certainly, they would have said if something came up…if you needed to reschedule.

No.

You were obviously being silly. You hadn’t seen them all day, but they hadn’t seen you either – it was just a coincidence. You were fine.

Except you weren’t fine. Because it was about seven minutes after the time you had agreed to meet them before the boys joined you in the library. Remus offered you a hasty “sorry we’re late, dove” and a squeeze of your shoulder before taking a place at the table across from you, and Sirius pecked a quick kiss into your hair and sat beside you without saying a word.

It was painfully awkward. You’d asked them how their days were – Remus answered for the both of them before he asked you how yours was in turn.

After two more (failed) attempts on your part to make conversation, the rest of the study session was spent in silence. And not a comfortable silence.

It was the kind of silence that had you checking your surroundings every so often. The kind of silence that made you feel as if bugs were crawling over your skin.

Every time you looked across at Remus, he seemed to be shooting concerned glances over at Sirius. Every time you looked in your periphery at Sirius, you could see he was zoned out, eyes rimmed and red like he’d been crying or angrily rubbing at them.

If something was wrong, they would have told you – right?

If they were regretting being with you, they wouldn’t have shown - right?

If they were going to break up with you, they wouldn’t do it in the library of all places.

Right?

Your musings were interrupted when Sirius let out a sharp breath and closed his book unceremoniously.

“Sorry guys, I’m not feeling the best. I think I’m going to pack it up.”

Remus immediately perked up, looking like he was ready to pack up too. “Okay, do you want company?”

Do you want me to come with you?

“No, that’s alright. Don’t let me impede your studying. I’ll catch up with you later, ‘kay?”

I’ll talk to you more in our dorm room when we’re alone, Remus.

“Sorry, sweets. I’ll make it up to you.” He said as he hugged you from behind and kissed your neck.

“Okay, I hope you feel better.” You offered as you awkwardly pat his arms. He gave you a half-hearted smile before quickly exiting the library.

Once his figure disappeared from your vision, you turned back to see Remus still looking towards the way Sirius just left; he was still poised as if he was ready to pack up and go after him.

You suddenly felt guilty…because if you weren’t here, he would be going… He’d be going after his boyfriend and comforting him through…whatever he’s going through.

So now, here you were keeping Remus from where he really wanted to be, and Sirius from having the support that he needs…that he deserves.

My gods, you’ve made such a terrible mistake. How did the three of you not notice?

“Sorry about that, love.” Remus mentioned quietly, offering you a half smile. “He…he got a letter from his family today. He doesn’t really talk about it with people.”

He talked about it with you, though.

“It usually takes him a day or two to sort it out before he comes back to us.”

You mean back to you, James, and Peter…

“I’ll talk to him.”

When you leave me…to go to him.

You hated even feeling petulant about it. One of the things you loved about these boys was how much they loved each other. The trust, the affection, the care…you had just hoped that somehow, you’d get to enjoy those things too.

You offered him the best smile you could muster as you turned back towards your book. You could no longer make the words out as your vision blurred, tears threatening to spill out over the arithmancy calculations spread below you.

You couldn’t keep doing this. Not to Remus, not to Sirius…and certainly not to yourself. You deserved better, all three of you did.

You were being selfish, inserting yourself into their relationship like this; demanding things from them that they didn’t owe you.

“You know what,” you offered quietly, clearing your throat as your voice came out scratchy, grating along the lump lodged in your throat. “I think I’ve gotten enough studying done for tonight.”

You stood and started piling your things together.

“Oh…are, are you sure?” Remus asked like he was willing to argue, but he too was standing and starting to pack his bag – eager to get to his dorm and check on Sirius.

“Yeah, I did some work on it at dinner as well.”

Remus grimaced slightly at that.

“I’m sorry dove, really. The three of us clearly haven’t had a great day. I’ll talk to Sirius, and I promise we’ll all be back in sync in no time.”

You looked into his eyes and saw sincerity.

Back in sync.

Were we ever in sync to begin with?

“Can I walk you to your dorm?” He asked as he made to move around the table, but he paused at you quickly shaking your head.

“No, no I’m alright. I can find my way.” You tried to joke, but it fell flat.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. No, don’t worry about it just – uhm – just make sure he’s okay for me, yeah?” You asked as you walked backwards to the door. Remus must’ve picked up something in your tone, his eyebrows furrowed as he looked you up and down.

“I really am sorry, Y/N. We’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

You quickly wiped away a stray tear that found its way out of your water line and gave him the biggest smile you could muster.

This was better, you thought, let everyone out of their misery.

“’Course. I’ll, uhm, I’ll see you around, Lupin.”

And you left.

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sleyu · 9 months

Note

thinking about how mean!bf sirius would have a hugeee corruption kink, he just wants to ruin your mind yk

idk maybe its just me

i think mean or not, it is definite that sirius black has a corruption kink and it unquestionably couples with his possessive nature.

just imagine mean bf ! sirius meeting you for the first time. you’re a timid, but undoubtedly kind individual who is meek next to him—fully aware of sirius’ notoriety in his personality and habits. he becomes so awestruck, he has nothing to respond to your unassuming questions aside from the occasional nod or gentle murmur.

he displays a calm, relatively friendly aura until the pair of you begin to become acquainted with each other and ultimately, begin dating. it is only then, that the mean teasing and snickers begin, and his heart bursts with joy at the sound of your bashful whines and protests every time he playfully slaps your ass or tugs your skirt, laughing and pulling you close to him, muttering how his actions are all in good fun and that he’d never let anything actually hurt you.

‘so bloody sensitive. y’know i’d rather die than let someone lay a hand on you, dummy.’

and of course, sirius isn’t stupid. he’s been having lewd, perverted thoughts about you since the day he met you. in fact, it was only the same night that sirius cast a silencing charm around his bed to hide the sinful sounds of him grunting as he fisted his cock, thoughts about bending you over the classroom desk polluting his already depraved mind.

since you’ve started dating, he reckons it’s time to manifest these fantasies into life, especially after noticing how your meek gaze has begun to linger on his broad chest and widen at the sight of his bulging crotch. his inner self beams with joy and crude anticipation every time he feels you pawing at his thighs, looking up at him in despair as if you’re unsure of what you really want or why the throbbing ache in between your thighs is only getting worse.

i think mean bf ! sirius would definitely become dizzy at the sight of you on your knees, hands gripping his muscular thighs, begging him to let you suck his cock or to fill your cunt up. usually he was the one doing the begging, but here you were, pliant, obedient, and desperate for his every touch. he genuinely has to sit down and stare at you while also controlling the immoral urge of forcing his cock down your throat, watching how your eyes widen and become teary as your throat contracts and chokes around his pulsating cock.

he genuinely cannot control himself once he sees you fully submit to him, begging him to give you the exact things you were too shy about even insinuating merely a month ago. it makes him feel so accomplished knowing that he was the one that made your brain all cloudy and fuzzy—that he was the one who got your cunt hooked on the feeling of his relentless, unforgiving cock.

‘sirius—my fingers—they’re not good enough—need your cock in me—jus’ want you to ruin ‘n abuse me—please da—’ as soon as you become close to uttering the last word, he’s already lifted up your skirt and forced his cock inside your aching pussy anyways, groaning into your mouth and fucking you ten times harder than he would have any other day.

‘slut—you’ve become a little slut—oh, fuck—‘n who’s are you, huh?’

it becomes the first time that sirius loses all sense of reason and caution as it has become evident to him that he’s irreversibly corrupted you into becoming just as disgusting and perverted as him.

‘nah, not sirius’, honey, you're daddy’s, yeah?’

‘gross fuckin’ bitch loves that, huh, puppy? you like it when daddy forces himself inside you like that, hm?’

‘hogwarts newest slut, yeah? but only mine, isn’t that right? only i get to ruin—fuck—this whorish cunt—mmm,’

sirius is so mean, he doesn’t even tell you when he’s about to cum :( he makes you cum and afterward, you’re a fucked out mess because he just doesn’t stop. your eyebrows begin to furrow and you can only manage to mumble a quiet ‘sirius?’ before he groans into your neck, breath all hot and heavy, and pumps you full of his hot, sticky cum. all you can do is whine and writhe beneath him as he pushes your knees to your chest and uses your cunt to drain his massive cock.

all the while, he’s reveling in the realization that he has just cummed inside you and that if spells and birth control were forgotten, it would be no surprise if you fell pregnant with the copious amounts of cum pumped inside your spent hole.

‘my dirty girl likes when daddy breeds her, doesn’t she? oh, don’t shake your head, pup, i know you like it—can feel you clench—god—around me right now.’

sirius gets so turned on when you confess that you can’t make yourself cum without him ever since the two of you started having sex. the image of you crying out in frustration at the feeling of your own neediness and the dull throbbing in between your sore thighs—incapable of doing anything without his guidance—makes his cock harden far quicker than it should have.

‘poor thing. my dumb girl can’t do anything without me, can she? your small fingers just aren’t as daddy, hm?’ paired with a faux, mocking frown because sirius black is an asshole that is very visibly ecstatic that you’ll always have to come to him to find a release.

and nothing fuels his ego more than having you beg him to stuff you full of his cum before class begins. he loses his mind seeing the effects of ruining your perfect, angelic interior. his once smart, goody-two-shoes, good-girl has become a conniving slut, her own cunt betraying any logic or rational thinking within her mind :( seeing his shy, perfect-attendance girlfriend begging him to skip class with her to fuck in a dingy broom closet is all it takes for him to bust right then and there.

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wolfmoonmusic · 11 months

Text

Misunderstandings

Summary: Sirius is yours and you are his. But do you both know that?

Request: Sirius and reader have a kind of an off and on flirtation/situationship thing going and he sees her going on a "date" with Frank Longbottom (personally I had headcanon that Frank was the fifth boy in the dorm along with the Marauders) in reality she's went on a pretend date to help Frank get ready for the real date he's taking her best friend Alice on and so Sirius gets jealous and wants to make things official before he loses her to someone else a little bit of angst with happy ending you know

Requested by: @jessiegerl

Pairing: Sirius Black x reader

Warnings: Readers parents hate her and well we all know how Sirius's Parents are.

w/c: 2.8k+

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<3

Sirius Black was not used to affection.

It was foreign to him. He never received praise, compliments, or anything positive. Ever.

So when the acquaintances he’d made on the hogwart’s express clapped him on the back after getting into Gryffindor, he didn’t know how to react other than to flinch.

And when you, introduced as James’s honorary sister, sat down that night, you’d complimented his hair.

You’d said “I like your long hair. It suits you.”

His parents hated that hairstyle.

He’d kept it purely as an act of rebellion. However, now, now he seemed to like it just a bit more. He hadn’t said thank you. Because he hadn’t known he was supposed to. So he’d just nodded, and you’d grinned.

That grin changed everything. You changed everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What if we make polyjuice potion, and I disguise myself as Narcissa, lead Lucius on for a bit and then prank him?” you asked, playing with the quill in your hands.

Remus groaned, “We’re still on this?” he asked, throwing his head back in disbelief.

“N/n, Remmy is right, we pranked Lucius only the day before yesterday,” Sirius nodded. You raised an eyebrow at him knowing he was never one to back down from a prank on any Slytherin.

And you were right. He wanted to do it. But if that meant Lucius got a chance to be near you even in a slightly romantic way, he would hurl.

And possibly punch him.

“Oh c’monnn Siri,” you whined, putting on your best pleading face and puppy eyes.

Damn those puppy eyes.

Sirius just shook his head, ignoring the way his heart was racing at your look. He watched as you pouted, leaning back on to the couch, head resting on James’s shoulder. “James, help me out here,” you said, folding your arms as you waited expectantly.

But James was too busy staring at a certain redhead and you, still staring at Sirius, nudged James in the chest.

“Huh? What?”

Sirius burst out laughing at the way your face twisted in pure irritation, the other two boys joining in as you hit James repeatedly with a pillow.

“Ow ow! I’m sorry, I'm sorry!” James laughed as you continued your assault fighting the grin that was creeping up on your face.

“Fuck you Potter!” you laughed, as James tried to correct his hair, you stopping him and messing it up further.

Sirius watched the exchange between you both, a sick feeling crawling up his chest. He knew that you both were no more than honorary siblings and it would always be that way, but deep down he wished you were sitting next to him, doing all that silly stuff with him.

He immediately brushed it off, not one to allow feelings to linger for long, replacing his hardened stare with a smirk instead, watching you and James continue to fight like kids, admiring the bright smile on your face.

He wished that that smile would never go away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Black, if you could be any animal in the world which was not a dog, which by the way I still don’t understand why that’s your favorite animal, which would you choose?” you asked, mindlessly hooking your hand with his as you both walked to class in 4th year.

He ignored the burst of feelings that erupted in him, trying to focus on your question and not on the way your hand felt against his, clinging on as you pranced lightly. “Uhh, I don’t know” he muttered, his brain fogging up as he refrained himself from staring at your linked hands. You hummed, breaking away from him as James and Remus came into view outside the class.

He paused for a few seconds trying to calm down his erratic heart before shaking his head and entering the class.

You waved him down, patting the seat next you, and the second he sat down, you grabbed his arm, sticking your tongue out at a slytherin girl eyeing you both with pure jealousy written all over her face.

Sirius laughed, “What’s that all about?”

“She likes you,” you pouted, “and asked me, ME to set you both up!” you pointed to yourself in disbelief.

“She looks cute,” Sirius said, winking at the girl.

You gasped at the way the girl blushed in response. “She’s a slytherin!” you exclaimed, swatting his shoulder.

Sirius shrugged, “Good point, guess I’ll have to find someone else then.”

“No way! You’re mine” you said seriously, jabbing a finger at his chest.

His heart erupted, eyes widening. But he played it off quickly, leaning over to whisper in your ear. “You wish sweetheart.”

Your face turned pink, eyes widening. Luckily the professor walked in, not allowing Sirius to dwell on your reaction.

Merlin, he was done for.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were always a naturally happy person. The boys had never seen you cry, even though they’d all had their breakdown moments. You’d been their rock through everything.

However, when 5th year started, you’d changed. You opted out of pranks, studying almost all the time and the usual spark in your eyes had faded. James seemed to know what had happened but he refused to let the others know, telling them it was up to you to reveal it to them.

He was worried about you, Sirius could tell, and that made the long-haired boy worry even more.

He’d tried to get you to talk to him, but you’d refused.

Until one day you’d shown up to Charms, puffy-eyed and asked Sirius to meet you in the Astronomy tower after his classes were done for the day.

He’d waited anxiously, and as soon as his classes finished, he ran to find you.

You were standing right where you’d said you’d be, gazing up at the sky. You turned when you saw him, a small smile forming on your lips. But the boy noticed the way it seemed to require so much effort from you, which was never the case before.

You turned away again, wordlessly staring at the sky. He wanted to demand an explanation, no longer able to watch you like this.

“Y/N-”

“I’ve never stopped to think,” you started softly, still staring above. Sirius stepped closer to you, waiting patiently for you to continue.

You took a deep breath before turning to face him.

“I’ve never let myself stop doing things or take a break because then all the thoughts flood the gates and I feel like I’m going to drown. But-” your eyes glazed over as you took a shuddering breath, looking down at your feet.

Sirius grabbed your shaking hands with one of his own, using the other to lift your chin up so that you could look at him.

“I’m listening,” he whispered.

You bit down on your lip before starting again, “But this summer was bad Siri- they- they said the worst things and-” you couldn’t finish as a sob wracked through your body.

Sirius pulled you to him, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and another lightly around your head as if trying to shield you.

He knew about the situation with your parents. They were almost never at home, and whenever they were, they made it very clear that they hadn’t wanted children in the first place. That’s why you spent most of your time at the Potter’s.

It’s also why you understood his situation so well.

You pulled away, wiping your tears away as you looked at Sirius. “Euphemia says she won’t let me go back this time even if they ask,” you laughed slightly remembering the possessiveness that had come over the older Potter.

Sirius smiled, “Good.”

“Thanks Siri,” you nodded, and Sirius beamed at the real smile that made its way to your face.

“Anytime princess. But don’t get too comfortable, other girls will get jealous.”

You gasped, playfully punching him on his shoulder, “I better be your one and only Black!” you laughed, and he joined in, hiding the way that sentence struck his heart.

Little did you know.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Sirius found himself knocking on the door of the Potter’s house, he didn’t expect for you to open it.

Shit. He’d forgotten you stayed there now.

But he couldn’t back away. He didn’t have the energy, nor did he think you would let him, at the way you gasped in horror as you looked at him.

He mustered all his strength into a cheeky “Hi” before James appeared behind you, giving the same reaction you had seconds before. You stood there in shock, hands over your mouth and eyes watering at the sight of the boy in front of you.

Sirius gave up on trying to fake it, giving in as you and James pulled him inside the house.

“James, get your mom,” you ordered. The boy hesitated as you guided Sirius to the sofa, before you turned and glared at him and he ran off.

Your eyes scanned the boy, a sort of resolve taking you over as you kneeled down in front of him. Sirius was fighting to keep consciousness and he didn’t know how much longer he could hold it for.

“Sirius,” you called gently, placing a hand on his knee, slowly and carefully. “What happened?” you asked.

Sirius didn’t want to relive what his mother had done to him, trying desperately to push it all away, trying to drown himself in your presence. But he knew you’d need an explanation if you were to help him get rid of the immense pain he was feeling right now.

“Cruciatus,” he whispered, noticing the horror and anger that made its way to your face, but also noticing the way the gentleness of your touch hadn’t changed.

“Can’t go back. Ever.” he muttered, and you were quick to adjust yourself so that he could look you in the eyes. “You won’t ever be going back. Even if Euphemia can’t keep us all here, you and I will find another place. But Black,” you placed a careful hand on his cheek and he leaned into it, “You are never. Ever. Going back there.” The seriousness in your voice gave Sirius enough strength to whisper a “Thank you” before partially fading out of consciousness again, comforted by the fact that you were here, and for once in his life feeling that things would be okay.

He could vaguely make out Euphemia and Fleamont’s reaction to seeing him nearly passed out on the couch, and your hurried explanation of whatever you’d understood from what he’d said. Euphemia walked up to him moments later with a some medicine in hand, something about opening his mouth, gulping, and about helping him sleep and doctors and the next day at sunrise. He couldn’t process it, just doing what he was told.

James and you then carefully lifted him, carrying him to a room and gently placing him on a bed.

He could hear you and James both talking in hushed whispers, but he was unable to make out what you were saying, as he fell into a disturbed sleep.

He woke up in the middle of night once, sweating and terrified, haunted by what he’d seen in his nightmare. But before he could properly react and realize where he was, you got up from beside him.

He couldn’t breathe, and tears were streaming down his face. He could see you move to sit in front of him and your lips moving but he couldn’t make out what you were saying.

You then gently placed your hands on his face and surprisingly it helped.

It grounded him, reminded him that he was with you and not with his monstrous parents.

Your voice started to fade back in and he could hear you telling him to breathe, and so he did, thankful that you were there to help him.

Of all the Marauders, he felt the safest with you.

“I’m okay,” he whispered once his breathing was back in his control. You nodded, sighing softly.

“Thank you,” he muttered, looking up at your tired eyes, “and I’m sorry I woke you up.”

“It’s fine,” you shrugged, “I hadn't slept. I was too worried.” You said, moving to sit against the headboard of the bed.

“Sorry for that then,” Sirius said lying back down.

You stared at him for a few minutes before running a hand through his hair, massaging his scalp softly.

“It’s not your fault Sirius, don’t apologize.”

Sirius didn’t respond, trying to focus on you, and on where he was, rather than the memories that were flooding his brain.

You laid down next to him, and Sirius realized that he was infact in your room, and as he turned to apologize once again, you placed a finger on his lips.

“If you apologize for intruding or something like that again, I will make you sleep on the couch.” you threatened your voice laced with humor.

Sirius smiled at you slightly, and you pulled him close to you, allowing him to tuck his face under your chin as you wrapped your hands and legs around him. He was glad you did so, it made him feel safe, and as if you’d heard his thoughts, you whispered into his ear “You’re safe with me Black. You’re mine, and I’ll keep you safe”

He wished he really was yours.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sirius couldn’t find you anywhere. And what worried him more was that he couldn’t find Frank anywhere either.

Why did that matter?

Well as you and Sirius had gotten closer and flirtier, you and Frank had gotten closer too. After the fiasco that took place over the summer, you’d spent more time with the boys in their dorm room and naturally that meant you were hanging out with their roommate Frank Longbottom as well.

And now Sirius was worried that you’d thought his flirting was just him being Sirius and that he had no actual feelings for you.

If you really did think that and if you’d decided to hang out with Frank instead, Sirius had no idea what he would do.

He’d searched every nook and corner of Hogwarts and now the only other place he could think of was Hogsmeade.

Oh Merlin he hoped it wasn’t Hogsmeade.

Sirius snuck out of the school during study hours, making his way to Hogsmeade, anxiety filling him.

As he made his way through hogsmeade, his heart dropped when he saw your familiar figure next to Frank’s.

Your head was thrown back in laughter, and Frank was grinning. “You did great! I’m sure next time will be just as smooth,” you said, patting him on the shoulder.

Next time?

Fear creeped up on Sirius.

He couldn’t lose you to Frank.

He couldn’t lose you to anyone.

He ran up to you and Frank, seeing both of your faces twist in confusion.

“Sirius?”

“You can’t date him!” Sirius exclaimed, pointing to Frank.

“What?” you and Frank both said at once, before realization crossed your features and a small smile formed on your lips.

But Sirius was too anxious and worried to register it, only glaring at Frank.

“Frank, what about you go back, and I’ll figure out what Sirius wants,” Frank nodded at your suggestion and walked off, patting Sirius on the back once.

“Why can’t I date Frank?” you asked, looking at Sirius who was still glaring at the boy who’d just walked away.

He spun around to look at you, surprise all over his face. Anyone could see you struggling to hide your smile and maintain a serious expression on your face, but Sirius was blinded.

“Because- ‘Cause-” Sirius faltered, what he was about to do, dawning on him. He hadn’t wanted to confess to you like this.

“Because?” you asked, raising an eyebrow and crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“Because I like you,” he rushed out, scared he would think twice and miss this chance. And the slight tinge of pink in your cheeks gave him confidence.

“Actually no, I don’t like you, I love you. I’m head over heels for you and I cannot imagine not being with you, at all. I want - no need you to be mine”

You grinned, “Black finally confesses! And you really think I would have gone out with Frank when I have feelings for you? He wanted me to help him get ready for the actual date he’s taking Alice on, since she’s my close friend.”

Sirius heard nothing except - “You have feelings for me?”

You laughed, linking your hand with his, “I thought it was obvious!”

He turned you around, looking at you, “You really like me?”

You shook your head, laughing lightly, before leaning up to place your lips against his.

His hand moved to your waist, pulling you in, as your hands wrapped around his neck, fingers entangling in his hair.

You both pulled away a few moments later, gasping for air.

“I’ve been yours since the first day I saw you,” you whispered, eyes locked on his.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you too. But I think I love your hair more.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglists: @pinchofhoney @targaryenmoony

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appocalipse · 1 year

Text

RIGHT WHERE I WANT TO BE : ̗̀➛ SIRIUS BLACK

summary: it's only when lily accidentally spills amortentia on you and all you can smell is cigarettes and dog fur that you realize you're in love with sirius — probably the only person in the world you shouldn't be in love with.

"Oh, crap!" Lily seems on the verge of panic as she stares at the fresh stain on your clothes. "I'm so sorry!"

Somewhat shocked, you reach your hand to the front of your uniform and try to rub it away. It's no use. "It's okay," you assure her gently, relieved that the liquid didn't spill on the clean set of clothes you were folding instead, "it was an accident."

You put the clothes safely away in the trunk near your bed. They still have the fresh and clean scent of lavender. Your uniform, however…

Lily points her wand at your chest, and the stain quickly disappears. She had rushed through the entrance of the dormitory fast as lightning, crashing right into you and spilling…

Well, what exactly?

"Lily," you bring a hand to your own face, sniffing, then sniffing again. "What is this? It smells like a wet dog and-"

Your eyes meet and you immediately dislike the look on her face. Too much restrained excitement slowly bubbling up...

"-cigarettes…" you trail off, some sort of realization dawning on you way too late.

It can't be.

Lily bites her lower lip as if trying to hold back a smile. "Is that what it smells like to you?"

You also catch the scent of quill ink and freshly brewed coffee, so it can only be…

You put your hand away from your nose as if it's on fire.

"Tell me this is not what I think this is."

"If you're not thinking of Amortentia, then yes."

"Why would you brew Amortentia?!"

"For Professor Slughorn," she sees the confusion etched on your face and looks positively horrified. "Not for Professor Slughorn to drink! Ew! I said I'd like to try brewing one because it's, you know, a bit complicated and I've never tried before. He said he'd give Gryffindor some points if I succeeded. I didn't know you would… you know, smell Sirius."

"I never said I smelled him!"

"Okay! Okay," Lily raises both hands in surrender. Then, quieter, she adds, "You can pretend all you want."

You sigh. "Did you only have this vial?"

"Well, there should be some potion left in the cauldron, I think."

Great. An opportunity to escape this beyond strange situation. "I'll go get it for you."

"But I-"

You're out the Gryffindor common room before Lily has a chance to question your offer. The need to get away from that impending conversation is stronger than anything else right now.

Your heart is racing as you walk through the corridors of the castle, heading towards the dungeons, where Potions class usually take place. Each step is an effort to calm your turbulent mind and find some peace.

Upon reaching the Potions classroom, you welcome the silent space as you enter. The characteristic smell of magical ingredients and herbs fills your nostrils, bringing a familiar and almost comforting sensation… until you catch that smell. Amortentia.

You look around, searching for Lily's cauldron, which she mentioned leaving behind.

It's not hard to find; the smell is quite distinct, enchanting, all the things you love most in the world somehow united in a single aroma.

The cauldron is sitting on one of the workbenches. You approach cautiously, making sure not to knock anything over. Then you rummage through the shelves for an empty vial and pour some of the potion into it, feeling like you're doing something wrong even though Lily had Slughorn's permission.

The door opens, and you almost drop a row of glass bottles as you turn to look.

"What are you doing here?" he asks.

It's Sirius. Of course, it's him.

He closes the door behind him, and your heart skips a beat as it usually does whenever he's around. He's wearing the Gryffindor uniform, the first two buttons undone, revealing a patch of delicate skin just below his neck.

You don't need to wonder how he got there or why. Chances are, he extracted every piece of information he needed from Lily with little to no effort.

"What are you doing?" he asks calmly. You, on the other hand, don't feel calm at all.

"Nothing, just..."

"Just?" He takes a step closer, and you instinctively move away from the workbench, trying not to show the nervousness you truly feel.

"I just came to get something," you say.

Sirius gives a suspicious glance at the cauldron. "Is it a love potion?" He's a skilled wizard. Skilled enough to know the answer to that question, yet he waits for you to respond.

"Lily made it," you say defensively, holding up the vial containing the potion to illustrate your point unnecessarily.

"And what scent do you smell?" he questions, with a genuine curiosity in his tone that catches you off guard. "What does the potion smell like to you?"

"Lily told you," it's far from a question.

But Sirius has a knack for playing games.

"She told me what?"

"You know what."

This time, you step back as he advances, unable to help yourself, swallowing hard and Sirius notices. He takes another step forward, and you take another step back.

"Sirius," you warn.

In return, Sirius says your name, his tone lighter, more playful, soft as a feather. Then, another step.

You nearly bump your hip against one of the workbenches as you take another desperate step back. Sirius, being Sirius, raises an eyebrow, making no effort to hide his amusement.

It's unfair. It's simply unfair that he's so good-looking, starting at you without feeling the need to averting his gaze. "You don't have to do this," you find yourself saying.

Sirius seems genuinely puzzled.

"Do what?"

You steal a glance in your peripheral vision. The room won't go on forever; you need to say something to get out of this situation before he gets too close. You don't trust yourself near Sirius.

"Turn me down. Be all nice-" you stutter. He keeps advancing toward you. Back almost against the wall, you dodge another workbench and turn to the left, trying to prevent him from cornering you.

Sirius chuckles. "Is that what you think?"

"I'm a big girl. I can take rejection."

He glances in the direction of the cauldron. "Do you want to know what scent I smell?"

"No."

"Leather-"

"Sirius-"

"Gasoline," he raises his chin, nose in the air as if enjoying one scent after another. "Apple pie."

For a moment, you close your eyes. "Stop it."

"And lavender."

Your heart is pounding in your chest. He's not being serious, a little voice in your mind insists. It can't be serious. He's just teasing you... or maybe just being a good friend. Too good a friend.

It would be easier if he wasn't. If he were less kind to you, less handsome, less charming.

It's not easy.

You're breathless, trying to keep your distance from Sirius as he sets a slow advance, a constant tease. It's an internal battle between the desire to give in to the attraction you feel for him and the need to protect yourself — but the latter wins, for now.

"Sirius," you plead, your voice quiet, "stop"

He pauses for a moment, his gray eyes fixed on yours. "You think I'm joking, don't you? You think I'm just being nice?"

"I... I don't know, Sirius. It's so...confusing."

He takes yet another step towards you, his lips curling into a challenging smile. Always challenging. "Confusing or scary?"

The tension between you two is palpable, and you wonder if he can hear the rapid beating of your heart, threatening to break out of your rib cage any given moment. You know you're fighting your own feelings, afraid of surrendering to something that may - and probably will - end in heartbreak.

"It's not fair," you whisper, trying to keep your voice steady. "It's not fair that you're so... so-"

"So what?" he teases, closer. "So handsome? So charming? So... irresistible?"

You can tell he's somehow having fun. You don't understand how he can maintain a playful tone in a moment like this.

You catch a whiff of his cologne, feel the warmth of his body, and your heart races once again. If there's a way to prevent Sirius from getting what he wants, you don't know what it is. "So confusing," you finish, almost in a whisper. "You confuse the hell out of me."

Sirius pauses for a moment, his eyes locked with yours, and you momentarily catch a flicker of something deeper in this playful gaze. He slowly raises a hand and gently, gentler than ever, caresses your face, his fingers tracing a delicate path along your skin.

"I don't see how I could be confusing you," he murmurs, his voice soft and husky. "I thought I was being pretty clear..." It's teasing, of course it is; when it comes to Sirius, few things aren't.

But there's something else behind it, too.

The air grows heavier.

"You're not clear about anything, Sirius," you reply, your voice faltering slightly. "I never know what you're thinking. I never know what you really mean."

"Maybe you're just not paying attention."

You furrow your brow, confused by Sirius' response. He's playing with you, as he always does, but this time it feels more intense, more meaningful. You struggle against the temptation to give in completely, to say something you might not be able to take back.

"I do pay attention, Sirius," you respond, your voice showing determination you're not entirely sure you feel. "It's you who likes to make everything more difficult than it needs to be."

He moves closer once again, so close now that you can feel his breath against your skin, the tip of his nose an inch away from touching yours.

"Do you want me to be clearer?" he whispers, voice laced with a hint of his usual mischief. "Make it easier?"

You swallow, feeling your heart race. You know you can't admit your feelings for him, you can't let your defenses down. Not when he makes a point to hide comfortably behind a facade, away from anything that makes him feel vulnerable.

You need honesty.

"Yes," you whisper, your voice almost faltering. "Yes, I do."

Sirius pauses for a moment, eyes searching yours, and you can feel your breath catch in your throat. Then, slowly, he moves closer and closer still, until his lips almost touch yours.

There is a feeling that you can't quite put into words.

"I want you," he murmurs, an admission that hangs in the air like a charged electric current. "I want to be with you. I want you to be happy– I'll even accept your awful taste in music," he adds with a playful smirk, teasingly referencing your occasional guilty pleasure for a particular genre of music that he often mocks.

A laugh escapes your lips, a combination of relief and affection. His sincerity is pretty close to melting away any remaining doubts that linger in your heart. "I have great taste in music," you state playfully.

Sirius brushes the side of his nose against yours affectionately. "Sometimes," he gives in, voice filled with genuine warmth.

You lean into his touch, savoring the tenderness and intimacy of the moment. It's as if the world around you has faded away, leaving only the two of you in this bubble of shared emotions.

"Sometimes?" you raise an eyebrow, pretending to be offended.

He chuckles, a low and melodic sound that resonates deep within your chest, a sound you don't get to hear as often as you'd like. "You're lucky you're pretty," he teases, his voice filled with affectionate playfulness.

"Oh?"

"I have a soft spot for pretty girls."

You roll your eyes but can't help the smile that forms on your lips. "Flattery will get you nowhere, Black."

Sirius leans in and presses a soft kiss to your cheek, pulling away with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Who said I was trying to get anywhere?" he whispers, fingers trailing along the curve of your waist, drawing you closer. "I'm already where I want to be."

Your heart swells with warmth, and you can feel a blush creeping up your cheeks.

"Smooth talker."

It doesn't sound like an accusation when you're about to kiss him.

#sirius black x reader #sirius black #sirius black x you #sirius black oneshot #sirius black imagine #sirius black fanfic #sirius black x fem!reader #sirius black fluff #sirius black angst #sirius x you #sirius x reader #marauders fanfic #marauders imagine #sirius black drabble #marauders drabble #marauders era

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moonstruckme · 11 days

Note

can i request a reader who can’t admit she’s upset with one the marauders (or all)? like refuses to cry…only if you’re comfortable of course. thank you :)

Thank you for requesting gorgeous!

modern au

Sirius Black x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words

The smell of smoke coming from the kitchen is the first sign that Sirius has tipped over from resentment into remorse.

“Jesus,” you open the front door on your way into the kitchen, eyes watering, “what are you doing?”

“I was trying to make rice,” he says, fanning desperately over your pressure cooker, “but I think I’ve fucked it.”

“Do you think so?” Any other day you’d both grin at the harmless snark, but now Sirius’ expression pinches and you think your own must look the same, your tone more biting than you meant for it to be. “It’s fine, it’ll be fine once it airs out. Help me with the windows?”

Sirius acts like it’s a competition, opening three windows before you’ve finished two and looking at you like he’s expecting a pat on the head for it. You try to give him a smile, and his expression clouds over.

“Sorry,” he says, voice not quite cool but oddly remote, “the idea was to surprise you with dinner, and I’ve broken your rice thingy instead.”

“It’s not broken,” you reassure him. “I’m sure it’ll be fine once I clean it out. Why were you trying to make dinner?”

Sirius grimaces. It’s a full body motion, his eyebrows hooking in the middle while the muscles in his forearms shift uncomfortably and his shoulders migrate upward. “Sort of a shitty attempt at an olive branch, I guess.”

Some of the smoke has cleared, and you brave the kitchen. “I don’t need an olive branch,” you say. “If you say we’re good, we’re good.”

“Don’t do that.” He follows you into the kitchen. “I can tell you’re upset, just because—” Sirius hisses when you take the bowl out of the pressure cooker, transferring it swiftly to the sink “—fuck, baby, don’t burn yourself. Let me take care of that later.”

“I’d rather handle it now,” you say, turning on the faucet. “I’m just letting it soak anyway.”

“I’m trying to handle this.” Sturdy hands wrap around your shoulders, turning you to face your boyfriend. He looks at you steadily. “Don’t pretend you’re not angry with me, because I know that you are.”

A spark of annoyance tingles up your spine as you shrug, reaching behind you to turn off the faucet. “I’m not.”

“Can you stop trying to make me feel like an idiot? I know you. You’ve been all stiff since last night.”

“You were angry last night. Not me.”

“Yeah, well it seems to have caught on.”

You turn away from him and back towards the sink, swishing your hand in the cold water of the bowl to dislodge the charred rice sticking to the bottom. You don’t know where Sirius gets off, acting like you’re holding a grudge when he’s the one who shouted at you last night. Your phone had died while you were out with friends. That was all that had happened. You didn’t think anything of it, because Sirius, the only person who would really worry about not being able to reach you, knew you were out and that you’d be home late.

But when you had gotten home, he’d been furious. Gone on and on about how he’d been trying to get a response from you all night, and how dangerous it was to get drunk when you couldn’t call anyone (nevermind that you’d been with your friends), and how freaked out he’d been. He wouldn’t listen to you. He’d only wanted to yell and rage, and make you sit in your heels on the couch while he did it. He’d even seemed like he might be tearing up a couple of times. And you hated to think of him being scared for you, but since when was it your responsibility to answer every time he called? He knew you were with your friends. You hadn’t asked him to check in on you.

He’d gone to bed still fuming and you’d stayed on the couch rather than try to sleep in a hostile bed. Now, inexplicably, his tune seems to have changed.

“So,” Sirius sighs, “this is you not mad, huh?”

“Yup.” You scrub at the bowl with your fingernails.

“I just want a chance to apologize.”

“You can if it’ll make you feel better, but I don’t need it.”

“Why can’t you just admit it?”

“Because I’m not the one who gets pissy about stupid things.” You dislodge a chunk of rice and your hand slips across the bowl, splashing water onto your shirt. “That’s you.”

There’s a second of dense, oppressive silence. When Sirius breaches it, you can hear the smirk in his voice. “There’s my girl. Tell me about the stupid things I got pissy about, would you?”

“It’s nothing.”

“No, it’s not. It wasn’t nothing to me, and clearly it wasn’t to you either. Go on, doll.”

“I don’t want to argue with you.”

“Sure you do.”

“Why do you want to fight so bad?”

“Because,” Sirius says, and you can hear him moving behind you, can all but see him leaning against the counter, the picture of insouciance, “I think you need to get it out of your system.”

You scrub harder at the bowl. Blackened bits of rice float to the top of the water. “Like you do?”

A pause. His voice softens. “It’s not always a good thing. I shouldn’t have shouted at you, last night.” Something in your chest tightens painfully at this new gentle tone. “I’m sorry. I let my temper get the better of me. I was just worried about you.”

“I don’t think that’s my fault,” you say, managing to sound mostly normal. You dump out the contents of the bowl, filling it again with warmer water. “My phone was dead, and I was with my friends. I didn’t need you to worry about me.”

“I just do, when I know you’ve all been drinking, and I can’t talk to you to know you’re okay…” Sirius takes in a breath, breaking your heart with how it sounds like he’s trying to steady himself. “But you’re right, okay? It wasn’t fair.”

“I didn’t know I was coming home to be shouted at.” This time, your voice betrays you, a pitchiness that makes you go quiet fast. You hear Sirius move.

“Sweetheart?” he asks softly. There’s a touch at your elbow. “I’m sorry, baby, please look at me.”

You don’t want to, but you don’t want your embarrassment interpreted as ire. You take a quiet breath before pivoting from the sink. Sirius’ eyes are waiting, sad and fretful as they probe at yours.

“I’m sorry,” he says again, impossibly quieter, and runs his fingers from your elbow up the back of your arm. “It wasn’t your fault, I wasn’t being fair. I shouldn’t have shouted at you.”

You press your lips together, hard. His eyebrows hook up in the middle.

“You can cry, sweet thing. It’s okay.” You shake your head mutely, blinking, and Sirius makes a terribly lovely cooing sound, snaking an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest. You hug him back as the first hot tear rolls down your cheek. “Oh, sweetheart. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.” Your shoulders jump with a stilted, poorly repressed sob, his grip on you tightening. “It’s okay, I’ve got you. I’ve got you, baby. My temper tantrum really did a number on you, huh?”

You laugh wetly. “Guess so,” you squeak. “Sorry.”

“If you apologize for this, I may shout at you again,” he warns fondly. “You haven’t done anything wrong, lovely girl. Just let it out, if you need to.”

You know that’s not easy for Sirius to say. Know he’s likely close to tears himself, from how agitated seeing other people cry makes him. You appreciate the offer.

You fall into a silence less heavy than any that’s suffocated your home since last night, broken up only by the steady, quiet thumping of Sirius patting your back and the intermittent smooching sounds as he kisses your shoulder or your cheek or the side of your neck. You stand still in your smoky kitchen, wetting your boyfriend’s shoulder with tears and snot, and he lets you.

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whenlilyfallsinlove · 22 days

Text

jolene part 2

(aka remus having a fat crush on you) (basically part 1 from remus's perspective)

part 1

james potter x reader -> remus lupin x reader

@mishi-with-jazz you requested this, hope everyone enjoys :)

remus lupin prided himself on being smart. sure, he wouldn't go round bragging about it, but he knew he was clever. he was a good student, always achieving Os, and constantly top of the class (alongside lily). although recently, he didn't feel smart at all. that's because he had made a mistake. a big one. he had a massive crush on you. his best friend's girlfriend.

he hated himself for it. what kind of friend does that? but he couldn't help it. and anyway he had liked you first! way before james did, ever since third year. he felt selfish, thinking that, but it was the truth. james claimed he had liked you for ages, but remus knew that was nothing compared to the length of time he himself harboured feelings for you.

"hello darling." remus was broke from his thoughts by james' voice, and saw you had sat down next to james, across from him. across from him!!

you were beautiful, he couldn't help thinking when he saw you cheekily poked your tongue out at sirius. you had always been kind to him, ever since you sat next to each other in your very first year. potions, if he remembered correctly.

in fact, you even knew about his "furry little problem" as your boyfriend liked to call it. you found out in fourth year, and you were nothing but helpful to him. you promised not to tell anyone and hadn't treated him any differently. he was eternally grateful.

remus had not noticed he'd been gazing at you till you gave him a smile causing his cheeks to warm up and smile back, quickly looking away. he'd been caught staring. that was embarrassing. what if you thought he was a weirdo? what if james had noticed and forbid him from speaking to you? even worse.. what if james stopped being friends with him for fancying his girlfriend?

his panics stopped when he saw lily evans approach the table. he listened to you talk to her, thanking her, and then he noticed james' face. long before you had. before sirius aand peter had. he was blushing. was he serious? james was one of his best friends, don't get him wrong, but he had a girlfriend. it made it worse his girlfriend was you.

remus bit down on his marmalade toast, hard. he was angry for you.

"james are you okay?" he heard you ask curiously, causing him to feel a pang of sympathy for you.

he heard james brush you off, and suddenly it was like nothing had even happened. everyone seemed to have moved on. remus wasn't even sure that padfoot and wormtail had even noticed james' reaction to seeing lily.

he knew you had, though. you were quieter than usual. you looked.. sad.

he shot you a comforting smile, which you returned weakly.

at least you're smiling, even if it was forced.

sometime passed until you spoke up again

"i need to go to the library, does anyone want to come with?" you asked, looking hopefully at james.

"sorry love, got quidditch practice in ten minutes." james said with a sympathetic smile.

"it's fine." remus heard you mutter, you sounded a bit dejected.

"i'll go. i need to anyway, i need a book for the history of magic homework." remus surprised himself, not even processing what he had actually just said.

"thanks remus." you smile softly, and he follows you out of the hall.

you both walk in silence to the library, until remus decides to speak up.

"are you okay?" he asks, looking at your face.

"i'm fine, thanks though.." you said unconvincingly.

"are you sure? you look upset." he responds, giving you a worried smile.

"it's just... james. he's confusing." you sigh.

remus heart stopped. a small part of him hoped you'd tell him that you were planning to break up with james. he knew that was unlikely.

he gives you a nod to continue speaking and you smile in return.

"sometimes i think he still likes lily." you say, avoiding eye contact.

as much as remus wanted to tell you yes!! yes james still likes lily, but here i am and i like you a lot!! he knew he couldn't.

"don't be silly y/n." remus chuckles "james likes you, not lily. she's old news." he gives you a comforting pat on the shoulder.

"really?" you look at remus with such hopefulness, it made him hope what he was saying was true.

"really." he confirms. "james is crazy about you."

you smile at him, looking reassured.

"thanks remus." you say. "you're a great friend."

remus felt himself tense. friend. but of course that's all he was.. you had a boyfriend for godric's sake. he decided, however, he would like being your friend if it made you smile.

"it's no problem, really." he smiles at you and you carry on your journey to the library.

since that talk, you immediately felt closer to remus. you talked more and you both considered each other best friends.

weeks later, you were brought together again.

"you don't usually go to parties, do you remus?" you ask remus, who was holding up a drunk james.

gryffindor had just had a party to celebrate their quidditch win against slytherin and james, being captain of course, was drunk out of his mind.

he was touched you had noticed he didn't usually attend the parties. you were right. he didn't. but james and sirius were on the quidditch team, and he wanted to celebrate their win with them.

"n-no i don't, just wanted to support my friends." he decides to respond, and he knows what he said was apparently correct judging by the smile on you face.

he watched you talk to james comfortingly. merlin he wished you spoke to him like that. you were one of the nicest people he knew.

he zoned out a second but then sees your face, which instantly snaps him out of his daze.

"i'm not lily." he saw you grit your teeth. "would you rather have her take care of you?"

noticing your hurt words, he's quick to comfort you.

"don't worry y/n, he's drunk, he doesn't know any better." he tries to reassure you.

you nod back, but then collapse on a chair.

you looked sad. devastated. remus wanted nothing more to cheer you up.

"look.. y/n, i'll take him up to bed. do you want me to come back down so you can talk.. or do you want some space?" he asks.

"talk." you notice your abruptness and you feel your cheeks warm. "that'd be nice." you add on the end.

remus smiles at you and takes james up to their dorm, where sirius is left to deal with him.

"why's he such a lightweight?" sirius chuckles.

"i know. weakling." remus snorts. "he's fucked up though."

"he has?" sirius responds, with some surprise.

"yeah he's upset y/n." remus responds, frowning.

"prick." sirius rolls his eyes, turning his attention back to james.

"i'll be back.. soon." remus leaves his dorm, and goes back to where you're sat trying to regain yourself.

"hey.." you mutter when you see him, and he takes the seat next to you.

"talk to me." he smiles, sympathetically.

"it's james. again. you heard him. he's always thinking about lily! i'm his girlfriend, not her." a tear rolls down your face.

"oh y/n, don't cry." remus reaches out and brushes the tear away.

"sorry.. i'm pathetic. i just don't know what to do." you groan.

"look.. do you want my honest advice." remus scans your face.

you nod.

"talk to him about it tomorrow, if he doesn't take accountability for it. dump him. and i'm saying that as one of his best friends."

remus feels your gaze on him and feels his cheeks warm.

"oh remus." you lay your head on his shoulder, causing him to freeze up. he knew you weren't drunk but you were still a little tipsy.

he lets you lay there, you look tired.

"i wish james was more like you..." you mutter, drifting off.

remus's breath hitched. although this wasn't reliable at all (you weren't sober), this was progress.

looking at you with a small smile, he just couldn't help but love you.

#x reader #fanfic #harry potter x reader #fluff #angst #james potter x reader #james potter x you #james potter x y/n #james potter #remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x y/n #marauders #marauders x reader #sirius black

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remusluvr · 9 months

Text

do i wanna know? | sirius black

summary: Sirius learns the consequences of treating people he loves bad. content: negative thoughts, fighting, angst, unedited note: this is a part two to my previous fic words i used (sirius black)

Sirius cannot believe how badly he messed up.

It makes his heart ache when he sees you talking to anyone knowing that you won't talk to him. You won't even glance at him in the hallway. The dark circles under his eyes worsen with each day. You notice them, of course, you do because no matter how hard you try to forget the boy, you can't.

Not talking to him is driving you crazy. Seeing him around is driving you crazy. You hate to admit it but you miss Sirius. And Sirius misses you.

He misses you so much that his body hurts. He's weighed down in bed each morning, unable to decide whether or not to even try and get up. That's when James realizes he needs to step in. He can't let his best friend hurt like this.

"Pads?" he calls quietly, peeling back the curtains to Sirius's bed. Sirius groans, turning away from the incoming sunlight. James mumbles an apology, although he doesn't really mean it, before continuing, "Time to get up. You missed class yesterday, you got to go today or they won't let you play in the quidditch game on Friday."

"I don't care about quidditch." James knows he's not getting anywhere. He won't budge without initiative. If quidditch can't be that initiative for him, he has to find what will work.

"Can you please just go and talk to him? Please!" James begs, practically on his hands and knees in front of the table you're trying to eat breakfast at. "You know you still like him. Feelings don't go away that easily. He's so mopey without you."

"He did that to himself, James."

"I know he did but he really likes you. He messed up big time. He knows that. All he wants is to talk to you."

"He had plenty of time to talk to me."

James looks defeated when you stand up, walking past him quickly. And whilst he thinks he's lost, you're stuck thinking about the conversation. You hate yourself for considering talking with Sirius. But you miss him so much, it would be nice to just talk to him for a little bit. You don't have to forgive him.

That's not a good idea. You know that you will forgive him if he starts trying to explain himself again. You won't let yourself be hurt like that again.

Although, your inner debate lasts for days and you find yourself in a similar position to Sirius's - rotting away in your bed, refusing to talk to anyone. You're grateful that it is midday on a Wednesday because there is no one around when you finally get yourself out of bed and out for a walk.

Your feet take you to an old spot that you and Sirius frequented. There's a big oak tree that overlooks the black lake. You and him would often bring a picnic out here or you'd come out here and cuddle away from prying eyes. You hate it here now.

And you hate it even more when you get closer, crunching a leaf under your foot, and scaring the boy sitting against the trunk. Sirius jolts up, rubbing at his eyes as he adjusts to the light.

"Did you sleep out here?"

"N-not for very long, only got here a little bit ago."

You nod idly, beginning to turn on your heel to leave when he reaches out for you. His hand grabs yours and the look on his face nearly has your resolve breaking.

"Can we talk, please? Just give me five minutes," he pleads, not letting go of your hand until he sees you nod your head. You pull your hand from his and go sit down on his blanket. He joins you. It feels just like old times if you don't think about all the hurt and cruel words spoken to each other.

"I miss you so much," he starts, noticing the way your arms are crossed over your chest and you're sitting as far as you can from him, "And I am so sorry that I treated you the way that I did. I should have grown a pair and asked you out properly but I didn't. I fucked up so bad. I hate that you're not talking to me. And I hate that I deserve it. You obviously don't have to forgive me but I just needed to talk to you."

His hands are shaky as they rest in his lap. You're not saying anything and he wants to cry. You hate him and you'll never forgive him and he wants to steal a time-turner.

"You made me feel so special, Sirius. All I wanted was for you to ask me out. And when I say that is all I wanted I mean that that is all I wanted. You made me think that I would get that one day. Seeing you with other girls made me think that I was just a joke to you. I feel so stupid. And I feel any stupider that I miss you."

"If you give me a chance, I'll prove to you how much I love you. I know you have no reason to believe me but I want to show you."

"Y-you love me?" Your voice is shaky and you curse yourself. His face drops and if you weren't so shocked, you would've laughed. He doesn't try to backtrack instead just sitting there, eyes trained on the blanket pattern.

You were screwed from the beginning of this conversation. You knew you shouldn't have stayed and listened.

"If you hurt me, Sirius, you won't survive it," you threaten, pushing yourself into his lap. He can't believe it and tears sting at the corners of his eyes. He knows it's embarrassing but it feels so good to have you touching him again. "I love you, too."

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melodramaschild · 2 years

Note

Hello could you please do a poly! wolfstarchaser fic/ blurb where reader gets into a fight with their (readers) parents and then the boys comfort us

700 words || navigation || wolfstar x reader because I can’t read

“But I don’t understand!” you shouted out. It wasn’t at Remus and Sirius, it wasn’t at your boyfriends, not at all. But you did really need to scream. Tears were streaming down on your cheeks as your bottom lip wobbled.

Remus came closer to you, trying to catch you before you would get worse. “He’s a dipshit,” Remus quietly said, keeping his voice low as he and Sirius got closer to you.

“But I don’t want him to be!” You cried out, breath sticking up in your throat as you choked on your sob. “I know, I know…”

“I want him to be a good father for me like he’s a good father for my brother!” You scoffed and slid down to the ground, your back leaning against James’ bed.

Your breathing started hurting in your ribcage and you pulled your knees to your chest, burying your face in them as you continued crying.

Remus and Sirius sat down next to you, each of them by your side. Sirius put his hand on your shoulder, traveling a bit until he was able to pull you up from your hiding spot.

“Y/n/n-”

“I just want him to like me for who I am.” your voice broke and you trashed into Sirius’ arms, crying into his chest as he was rubbing your back in slow motions.

“We know, bunny, we know.” Remus sympathised, placing a small kiss on your shoulder.

They knew. They really knew. They witnessed many nights of your smile as you spoke about your father like he was your best friend, not realising that stories you told them were more like horror stories and that you were too young for any of that.

They witnessed many afternoons where you called your father and immediately started stuttering in fear and anxiety.

They saw so little, yet it was enough.

They knew how much you tried to make your father to like you.

“We know how strong you are,” Remus started when your cries only got stronger and stronger. “We know how much you tried.” He continued and placed another little kiss on your shoulder. “And we also know how tired you're. I know how much it matters to you.” Sirius added and squeezed you closer to him. If he could, he would keep you in his pocket and protect you from the whole world.

“It’s not your fault, his behavior isn’t your responsibility.” Sirius whispered and brushed your hair away from your face. “Sirius is right, bunny,” Remus agreed and took your shaky hand in his. “None of this is your fault. Sometimes some people are really dickheads, and sometimes they happen to be your father.” He explained. “And that doesn’t mean that it’s your fault. He has his own personal issues and insecurities and he is such a bad person that he is projecting that on you.” Remus drew circles into your palm with his thumb, massaging that spot that always calmed you down; and it worked.

Your cries went into small sniffles as you were shaking in Sirius’ arms. “Shh, it’s okay, pup, it’s okay” he whispered with his sweet voice, just for you to hear.

“I hope that you know how breathtaking you’re.” Remus leaned down to stroke your hot cheek with his knuckles. “And lovely, and humble,” he smiled and wiped your tears away with his thumb.

“And fragile,” Sirius said and you both looked at him, silently begging him to elaborate. “Well… whatever you have on your mind you also have on your tongue. You’re all emotions and I like that.” Yeah, he still needed to explain a lot.

“You’re like made of porcelain. So pretty to look, so pretty to touch, so pretty to talk about, so pretty to get to know. And porcelain is also fragile,” I promise you that Sirius really tried.

“And with those emotions? Yeah… whatever is on mind, you have on tongue. Always fighting for the right thing and fighting your father and professors and us,” he chuckled. “I don’t think that a person who isn’t fragile could be so strong like you.” And suddenly what he said made a perfect sense to you and your lip wobbled again.

“Shh, it’s all okay, our precious girl, I’d do whatever I could do.”

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strawberrysodaslut · 2 years

Text

‘See You Soon’ - PostAzkaban!Sirius Black x Fem!Reader

❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

[ sirius black masterlist ]

[ main masterlist ]

❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

summary: the last words your soulmate says to you is indented on your wrist, although nothing has happened, the words have held you back for years, but with Sirius, you feel everything is about to change

warnings: postazkaban!sirius x order!reader, fluffy angst, happy ending with a sad unspoken ending, abandonment issues? IDK LMK IF I MISSED ANYTHING

a/n: this is the shortest thing i’ve ever written yet simultaneously my favourite thing i’ve ever written just because of the context oml

❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

“See you soon”

Those words have haunted you since the day you saw them on your wrist. Such a mundane phrase, so common, filled with the intent of return.

Everytime you got close to someone, you made them swear, they would never say those words to you. Never. It wasn’t out of fear of them being your soulmate, it was the fear of what stopped them from coming back.

You and Sirius had gotten close, but not close enough to show what your words were. It was quite an intimate thing, to show the last words you’re ever going to hear from your soulmate. You didn’t show them to just anyone, but Sirius was more than anyone.

Though it felt wrong, you were certain you were in love with him. You had a feeling he shared that love, but you weren’t sure. It was hard though, knowing that there’s no way he’s your soulmate, he couldn’t be. The chances were too slim.

You were gonna tell him today, right now. Pushing away the nerves as you walk through the hallway of grimmuald place. It’s quite a beautiful house, maybe if all goes well this would be where you live.

“Sirius,” You say, walking up to him. “Can we talk?”

He turns, his tense face softening at the sight of you. But you didn’t miss the face he was trying to hide. Something was wrong. “What is it?” You ask.

He shakes his head, “There’s something- Harry needs me. At the ministry, I think he’s been tricked.”

Harry was a good kid, you barely knew him, but from the way Sirius talks about him, you know he’s special. Even without the “chosen one” title he’d been branded with.

“I’ll help.” You said, pulling your wand out of your bag. “I can come with you-“

Sirius cuts you off, “We have a team, there might be injuries. We can’t have our best healer getting hurt now can we.” He says, brushing your hair back. “We’ll talk about whatever you want when I get back, yes?” He smiles.

You nod, “When you get back.”

“Alright love,” He pulls his want out of his pocket, walking backwards, “See you soon.” He apparates away.

You feel the fear, the sting that always arrived when people said those words to you. But you bit them back, that fear had been holding you back. But not anymore, not today.

“See you soon” You whisper.

❛ ━━━━━━━━･❪ ❁ ❫･━━━━━━━━━ ❜

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kenthoe · 2 years

Text

fr tho why is everything smut😭😭 i wanna read angst that would ruin me, make me sick to my stomach and cry like there's no tomorrow bro i want a fanfic that is so devastating that i won't be able to function for the next few months

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ellecdc · 2 months

Note

PART 2 PLSSSSSSSSSSS

I need the comfort

ok ok ok ok ok mother's here - I've fixed it for you. Don't say I never did anything for ya 😉

part two of Mistake: poly!wolfstar x fem!reader

CW: angst, hurt and COMFORT read part one here

Remus felt like he’d just been slapped. In fact, he was sure that if he looked in a mirror, he would see a red welt in the shape of your hand across his cheek.

Lupin?

You haven’t called him that since...well since you started dating. As a matter of fact, he can’t remember the last time you referred to him in any way other than some sickly-sweet pet name that he pretended embarrassed him, but he secretly preened at.

I’ll see you around.

What the hell did that mean? What just happened?

He felt stuck...perhaps he should go after you? But you told him to go check on Sirius: make sure he’s okay for me, yeah? And he meant what he had said – the three of you would be back to normal in no time. They’d catch up with you tomorrow.

Remus tried to replay every interaction you had tonight. You had asked how their days were...he replied and asked how yours was. Should he have asked you first?

He should have asked you first.

You tried making conversation, but Remus was so hyper focused on Sirius’ mood – afraid that he’d do or say something out of pocket that would hurt your feelings – that each attempt sort of fell flat. Remus had been there before – he’s witnessed Sirius’ tendency to self-sabotage and ruin a good thing once he finally has it, and he didn’t want that to happen again. Not with you.

He knew what Sirius really needed was some quiet; a chance to ponder and lament angrily inside his own head without outside influence.

Maybe they should have cancelled – rescheduled your study date for another time. Clearly his effort to protect you from any negativity was in vain.

But it was just a bad day, a blip, a one-off. You would all get some good sleep tonight and reconvene tomorrow.

Right?

Maybe he should have followed you.

But by the time he could manage to pry his feet from the floor of the library that he felt cemented to, you were gone.

He would just have to talk it out with you tomorrow.

Remus entered his dorm to find Peter already asleep on his bed, James finishing the Transfiguration essay that was due tomorrow morning on his own bed, and both Remus and Sirius’ beds empty.

“Pads around?” Remus asked James quietly as he began to shuck off his uniform. The quiet tone was mostly for courtesy’s sake knowing Peter could sleep through a stampede of hippogriffs.

James peered at Remus from above his glasses before nodding his head towards the bathroom door.

Sure enough, Remus found Sirius leaning against the shower stall with his eyes closed as the water cascaded around his form.

“You almost done, love?” Remus asked gently. Sirius spooked slightly as he turned to look at Remus; his eyes were red and glossy...he had been crying.

“You didn’t stay with her?”

Remus fought the urge to grimace, to heave, to turn around and run. He opted to gently shake his head. “No, she... said she got most of what she needed to do done.”

Sirius seemed to consider that as he sighed. “Was she terribly upset? I didn’t...I didn’t mean to be an ass. I know James always says I’m quick to take it out on others – I tried really hard not to, honest. I swear it, Rem I-”

Remus began shaking his head as he moved towards Sirius. He could tell by the smell in the bathroom that Sirius had already washed his hair and there were no more suds on his body, so he turned the water off and handed Sirius a towel.

“You were fine, Sirius. She’s – she’s fine.” He lied.

He lied. He lied to Sirius. About you.

But how could he look Sirius in the eye right now – Sirius who was currently standing naked, soaking wet, nearly hyperventilating, not over his disgusting parents but because he was afraid that he may have upset you – and tell him that between the maybe seven minutes since Sirius had left the library and now, Remus had completely mucked it all up?

The answer was: he couldn’t. He couldn’t look Sirius in the eye and admit that he may have just sabotaged your relationship.

It’s going to be fine. He tried to tell himself. We’ll fix this all tomorrow.

You felt beyond childish, hiding in your dorm room like some toddler throwing a temper tantrum. But you had decided last night that what you really needed was space. Some breathing room. A chance to see this from a different lens. A different perspective.

And you couldn’t do that when your heart was breaking. And being around Remus and Sirius felt like that right now.

It felt heart breaking.

And perhaps that was your answer right there. If this was causing you heart ache, why were you doing it to yourself? To them? You didn’t deserve that, and neither did they.

But it wasn’t just this you were worried about. It was more than just this relationship – it was the friendship that preceded it. It was the meshing of you into their circle of friends. You were their friend long before you were ever their girlfriend. You wouldn’t just be losing Remus and Sirius: your boyfriend’s; you’d also be losing Remus and Sirius: your friend’s.

Maybe you should have thought about that before you said yes.

Suddenly, you were a little angry: they had asked you to be their girlfriend – not the other way around! Why would they put you through all of this for, what? For...

Was it really for nothing?

“Are you coming to breakfast?” Shelby asked you quietly from the door. You shifted your head on the pillow to make eye contact with her. “No, I’ve got some things to work on. I think I’ll hang out up here today.”

She seemed to consider you, eyes squinting and mouth pursing before she offered a curt nod. “I’ll bring something back for you then.”

You smiled gratefully at her. At least you knew if you did lose Remus and Sirius, you would still have friends who cared about you.

Sirius spent most of his life believing he’d never be worthy of nice things. He was raised by monsters which meant he was a product of monsters; he was basically a monster.

He knew that the Black Darkness was always simmering just below the surface. It was archetypal of Black’s to explode; to lace their words with venom and strike at their victim, always aiming for the jugular. It had been Sirius’ own M.O. for his whole life. He had nearly lost everyone who ever meant anything to him on account of it. He had almost lost Moony.

Which is why it was so important to him that you never end up the latest victim of his Black Darkness. He was so afraid of disappointing you, letting you down, making you feel unloved. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to live with himself if he slipped – if he said something or did something to make you hate him.

And it wasn’t just you he was worried about hurting; he knew if he hurt you, Remus would likely never forgive him.

Remus may have forgiven Sirius for his Darkness once; he didn’t want to risk trying for a second time. Sirius felt he’d hit his threshold for forgiveness – one more sin and he’d be on his own, surely.

So, he walked away. He tried to do it nicely – to excuse himself politely, assure you he’d be back in no time.

But he still left.

It was cowardly.

He needed to talk to you.

Which is why Sirius could be found that morning sitting at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall, knee bouncing frantically under the table and his body turned towards the entrance – waiting for you to make an appearance.

Except, you never came.

“Wait, Shelby just walked in without her. Where is she?” He asked despondently, turning towards Remus.

Remus watched as Shelby and a few of your other friends sat at their usual places without you. “Come on.” He said quickly as the two of them stood and made their way over.

“Hey Shelby. Do you know where Y/N is?” Remus asked quietly, hoping his guilt didn’t permeate his tone. Unfortunately, under Shelby’s scrutinizing glance, he was sure he had been found out.

“She’s in the dorm.” She said flatly, looking between the two boys.

Sirius exchanged a glance with Remus before continuing. “Erm, do you...do you know why?”

Shelby furrowed her brows “all she said was she had ‘some things to work on’ and that she’d be in the room today.”

Remus hissed under his breath and pulled Sirius aside.

“Pads, I’m sorry, but I think-”

“What is going on?” Sirius interrupted.

“Last night, I... I think Y/N was upset?”

“Upset? With me?” Sirius asked, shame worming its way through every cell in his body.

“I don’t know. I... I don’t think so. But she...she said she’d ‘see me around’ and then called me Lupin.”

All blood drained from Sirius’ face as he considered Remus’ words.

See him around...see him around!? What the hell did that mean? Did you not plan on seeing them again? Oh gods...you never planned on seeing them again.

“Rem...” Sirius breathed out, leaning against a pillar for support.

“I know, I don’t-”

“Good grief, what’s gotten into you two?” James commented as he walked into the Great Hall with Lily, who opted to carry on in her search for Regulus as James took in the state of his two friends.

“Well? What’s got you in such a twist?” He pressed when neither boy offered an explanation.

“It’s Y/N.” Remus admitted.

“She’s leaving us.” Sirius blurted.

“Okay, we don’t know that.” Remus conceded.

Sirius scoffed. “Well, she basically told you to go fuck yourself last night and now she’s avoiding us; what do you call that?”

“She didn’t tell me to go fuck myself!”

James groaned and rolled his eyes before grabbing Remus and Sirius’ shirts and dragging them over to the Slytherin table.

“That’s it. You guys need to talk to Regulus.” James muttered.

“Regulus?!” Sirius sputtered, looking at James incredulously. “I’m not asking my baby brother for relationship advice.”

“You’re not asking for relationship advice. You’re asking for his perspective on his own relationship.”

“Ew! That’s worse! I don’t want to hear about my baby brother’s relationship with my adoptive brother.”

“Oh for- you are going to listen to Regulus’ perspective on what it’s like being added to a polyamorous relationship last.” James pressed, tone implying no nonsense.

Sirius (unwillingly) and Remus (placidly) were dragged to the dark side (read: the Slytherin table) to be read their Miranda Rights have their asses handed to them by one Regulus Arcturus Black.

“Reg, dear. I’m begging, pleading, on my hands and knees: put the poor sods out of their misery.” James said as he bodily sat Remus and Sirius on the bench across from Regulus.

Lily snickered and poked her nose into Regulus’ cheek, causing the youngest Black to blush, though the rest of his face remained stoic as he sized Sirius and Remus up.

“What have the two of you done now?” He drawled. “I can’t help but notice one third – arguably the better third - of your little trio is missing.”

Sirius scoffed, though he didn’t argue – Regulus wasn’t wrong per se; he loved Moony, but you were indeed the best of the bunch.

James cleared his throat pointedly as he shot Remus and Sirius a look.

“Right, er” Remus started awkwardly. “We seem to have, uhm. I mean to say that-”

“Why does Y/N hate us?” Sirius spat, slapping a hand over his mouth immediately afterwards as if those words had fallen from his mouth without his consent.

“Y/N? As in your girlfriend, Y/N?” Regulus asked, moving his eyes between his brother and his brother’s boyfriend.

“Yes, as in our girlfriend.” Remus muttered.

“What did you say to offend her?” James asked unhelpfully.

“Do you think if we knew that, we’d be here right now?” Sirius spat back.

“No, I don’t think that.” Regulus answered for him. “What I think has probably happened is she’s feeling terribly insecure in your relationship and neither of you have done anything to help her.”

Well that shut Sirius up... Sirius noticed that Remus was pretty quiet too.

“Were...” Sirius asked, grimacing when he looked over at Lily and James knowing this was teetering slightly into the realm of things-he-doesn’t-really-want-to-know-about-his-brother’s-relationship-with-his-best-friend territory. But damnit, Sirius was as desperate man. And desperate times called for desperate measures. “Were you terribly insecure when you started dating...these two?” Sirius sneered the end of his sentence earning him a ‘hey!’ from Lily and a solid whack up the back of the head from James.

“Yes.” Regulus answered simply.

“Why?” Remus asked, looking desperately close to pulling out his notebook to take notes. Scratch that, Sirius watched as James swallowed a teasing remark when Remus actually pulled out a notebook to take notes.

“It’s hard coming after. There’s a part of your brain that convinces you that you are second best; that you’ve somehow come in second place. If that’s not bad enough, then you begin spending time with two people who already have history, already have a connection, and already have a rhythm that doesn’t leave much room to pull you into the mix. And if it does pull you into the mix, you end up feeling terribly guilty for disrupting that rhythm. It’s all quite difficult.”

Sirius’ mouth hung open at Regulus’ demure tone on what sounded like a really heartbreaking situation.

“Let me ask you this,” Regulus continued, unawares of Sirius’ inner dialogue (which consisted mostly of panicked ‘oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods). “How has your relationship – between the two of you – changed since you added a third?”

Remus and Sirius exchanged a glance before looking back at Regulus. “Uhm...not, really?”

“Not much at all.” Remus admitted more clearly.

“I see...” Regulus said, narrowing his gaze. “And how much time have each of you spent with her individually without the other present?”

Regulus got his answer in the form of awkward silence.

“How did either of you expect your relationship to work if neither of you were willing to change the nature of yours in order to help it grow?” Regulus spat.

“Well...” Remus started, but his sentence died when he realized there was nothing to say.

“But...you stayed? Why?” Sirius asked his brother.

At this, Regulus’s face fell as he gave Sirius a sad smile. “Because of how we were raised, Sirius. I was so excited to be wanted, even for a moment, that I was willing to beg for scraps of whatever I could sink my claws into. She doesn’t strike me as that kind of girl.”

James and Lily looked forlorn as the latter placed her hand on Regulus’ shoulder consolingly.

“It didn’t hurt to have the walking definition of unconditional love and the smartest, most intuitive witch I know to notice any discontent on my part.” He admitted shyly, earning him a smack of a kiss on the cheek from James.

“Gross. You guys are sickening.” Sirius muttered petulantly.

“So?” Lily interrupted what was close to becoming a squabble between the two Black brothers. “What are you guys going to do?”

Remus sported a determined expression as he looked to Sirius. “We’re going to make it right.”

Shelby stood by her word and brought your breakfast. She also brought you lunch, and then dinner. But by the following morning, she was tired of playing the role of house elf.

“Alright, are you going to tell me why you’re avoiding Lupin and Black?” She asked plainly, plopping herself down uninvited onto your bed.

“Wha-? I’m ... I’m not avoiding them.” You lied poorly.

“Please; don’t spit on my muffin and call it frosting, Y/N. You’re obviously avoiding them.”

“I...ew?”

She groaned and fell onto her back in defeat. “Please, for all that is holy, tell me why they’ve been following me around like kicked puppies hoping I’ll take them to their master?”

You rolled your eyes and turned back to your book that you held open but had never been reading. “Yeah, I’m sure they’re real upset.” You muttered.

“That’s it.” She spat and plucked your book out of your hands, throwing it over her shoulder unceremoniously. You cringed to think about how Remus would feel seeing a book treated in such a way.

“I was reading that!”

“Don’t lie to me again.” She said, levelling you with a ‘no nonsense’ look. “Spill.”

You sighed deeply, looking toward the window to try and find the words you’d spent the last 24 hours trying to formulate. She never rushed you for your answer, giving you all the time you needed.

“I feel insignificant.” You admitted finally.

“And?”

You turned to face her, bemusement painting your features. “What do you mean, and?”

“And... have you spoken to them about it?”

You felt a little embarrassed to admit that no, you hadn’t.

“Why not?”

And that simple question seemed to set off all the emotions (mostly frustration) that simmered beneath your surface.

“Because Shelby. Because I don’t want to have to beg for love and affection. I don’t want to have to tell people how to love me; they should just already love me. I don’t want to feel like I’m intruding in someone else’s relationship. I don’t want to have to point out that I’m here and I’m hurting. It’s mortifying. I... I think I’m just done.”

Shelby nodded in understanding before she stood from your bed. “Then you need to finish this today. No more hiding in your room being angry by yourself, and no more letting them sniff around the castle like dejected little runts. Put all three of you out of your misery.”

It was your turn to nod as you too stood from your bed, ready to face possibly one of the most heartbreaking days of your life.

But Shelby was right; it was time.

The worst part was that Shelby had been telling the truth; Remus and Sirius did look like kicked puppies.

The second you had entered the Great Hall you heard a crash of knees against benches and cutlery clashing as Sirius clumsily tried to vacate his seat in record time to make it over to you.

“Y/N!” He called, as if you could have missed the racket he made just prior.

He looked gaunt – like he hadn’t eaten or slept enough (in the only less than 48 hours) since you’d seen him last. His eyes were red and a little swollen, like he’d been rubbing at them.

You immediately felt sick with guilt; if he really was struggling with things with his family, the last thing you wanted was to add to his stress. But Sirius was looking after himself, and Remus was looking after him too; someone needed to think about you. You had to look after yourself.

Remus didn’t look much better, approaching the two of you much more slowly, hardly making eye contact with you as if you’d lash out at any moment. You had to admit that it annoyed you a little bit.

“Hi Sirius.” You offered, voice grating over the sudden tightness. “Remus.”

Some of the tension seemed to leave Remus’ shoulders as he made an effort to make eye contact with you.

“Can we talk?” He asked timidly.

You knew what was coming, what was happening, what you yourself had come here planning to do.

But it broke your heart nonetheless.

“Sure.” You whispered, and exited the Great Hall without waiting to see if they were following you.

You walked into an empty classroom and leaned against one of the walls as Remus and Sirius closed the door behind them. They shared another look and stood opposite of you.

More secret conversations. You thought bitterly. And doesn’t this just paint a lovely picture; them versus you.

“Y/N. We, uhm...we’ve been talking, and we realized that...that maybe we haven’t gone about this the right way.” Sirius started, looking at Remus continuously as he addressed you.

We’ve made a terrible mistake.

“We didn’t take into account the ways in which our relationship would have to change in order to make the three of us work” Remus added.

We didn’t realize how much you’d take away from us, you heard

“We feel like we’ve been unfair to you, and... we’re really sorry.” Sirius concluded, looking like his heart had been ripped out of his rib cage. You supposed that would make sense, considering that’s how you currently felt yourself.

It probably hurt all the same to them – they’d be losing the friendships the three of you had created too; the friendship you had with Remus, the friendship you had with Sirius, and the fun the three of you had all together. But you still loved them, and the last thing you wanted to do was to interfere in their relationship.

“It’s okay, it wasn’t your fault.” You admitted finally. “It was just a mistake.”

Remus’ head cocked to the side like a confused puppy whilst Sirius’ eyebrows furrowed. “Well...I, I’m not sure-” Remus started but was cut off by Sirius.

“Wait, Y/N, what exactly do you think the mistake was?”

You looked between the two of them as you lifted your shoulder. “I... I guess including me?” You stated as a question.

Sirius actually sputtered as Remus stepped towards you, stopping himself seemingly before he made to grab you.

“No! No, Dove. That’s not a mistake!” He insisted.

“Are you kidding? You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to us – no, no. This...wow, okay. Can we start from the beginning, please? Why do you think this was a mistake?” Sirius managed to (barely) get out.

You looked to the ceiling, eyes stinging at the reality of having to voice your hurt. “Because” your voice came out embarrassingly high. “Because it-it felt...better when we were friends. I didn’t feel...in the way. And it felt easier. Just - I didn’t mean to come in between you, and I never...” you cut yourself off, quickly moving into hyperventilating territory.

“But-”

“It’s not a mistake!” Sirius shouted, cutting Remus off. “This wasn’t a mistake! You weren’t a mistake. I... okay. I didn’t mean to fall in love with you, that’s true. But I don’t consider that a mistake. Not you, never you.”

“It was a surprise; a happy accident.” Remus added hopefully shy.

You felt drunk...dizzy...beyond confused. Weren’t they breaking up with you? Weren’t you supposed to be breaking up with them!?

“I think it was easier when we were friends because we weren’t putting so much pressure on ourselves to get this right.” Sirius explained.

Remus nodded and continued. “Sirius used to get so jealous if I got to hang out with you without him if he was at practice – took us a while to figure out that it was because he wished he was the one hanging out with you. When we started dating, I guess Sirius and I figured we’d just make sure to always hangout with you together so that neither of us felt left out. But we never even thought about how that must’ve been making you feel, dove. I’m so sorry.”

“Regulus read us our rights.” Sirius admitted abashedly. “He pointed out that the relationship between the three of us will only work if our relationships with each other are strong. And we didn’t make our individual relationships with you a priority – that was our mistake, Y/N. Not you.”

“Our mistake was believing you would just ‘catch up’ to where we are – which is years in the making – and also expecting you to somehow do that on your own. It was selfish and thoughtless.” Remus stressed

The things they were saying made sense and spoke to your very soul, but you couldn’t shake off this lingering feeling of dread.

“I... I should have said something... about how I was feeling.”

Sirius sighed, but it was Remus who spoke. “I think all of us could have done a better job communicating, that’s true. But we should have been more considerate. We asked you to join us, dove; we should have made that easy for you to do.”

“To think how much grief we’ve caused ourselves, when we could have just solved this all with a conversation.” Sirius mumbled dejectedly.

“We’re not too late, are we? To solve this?” Remus asked quietly. Sirius’ eyes looked like they were close to popping out of his skull as he stood and made for you, grabbing your hands pleadingly.

“Oh gods, Y/N. You... you were breaking up with us, weren’t you? You thought we were breaking up with you?” His voice sounded very close to a sob.

“Please...please dove I- I don’t know that we deserve it, but please give us a chance to make this right, to do this properly. Give us a chance to love you the way you deserve.” Remus begged, moving to stand in front of you with Sirius, though he controlled his urge to grab your hands.

You looked between the two boys; the two boys who you’ve been basically in love with for so long – the two boys who have proclaimed to feel the same way about you - and wondered to yourself again:

Have we made a terrible mistake?

Remus’ golden eyes shimmered with compassion and warmth, and Sirius burned fiercely in devotion and promises.

Had you made a mistake? Falling in love with them?

No.

Perhaps Remus was right. Perhaps this was a happy accident.

“Okay.” You whispered. Remus exhaled the breath he’d been holding while Sirius’ face morphed into a small, hopeful kind of smile – far shyer than you were used to seeing from the boy.

“Okay?” He asked, moving his hands up from your wrists to your shoulders.

“Yeah... I-I don’t want to lose you guys.” You admitted wetly, a tear betraying you as it fell down your cheek. Sirius was quick to catch it with his thumb.

“Never, dove. Not if I can help it.” Remus promised.

You believed him.

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sleyu · 9 months

Note

thinking about meanbf!sirius <3 visits you at work only to fuck you in the staff bathroom <3 speaks to you in french while you fuck because he knows you won’t understand what he’s saying and it makes you teary eyed <3 i love him so much PLEABS!!!

stop stop do you know how delusional this is making me . . . this is all i’m gonna think about when i’m at work.（；＿；）♡

i can picture him visiting you at work, maybe to pick you up after your shift ends, and him narrowing his eyes at one of your male coworkers that's being a little too close for comfort. when sirius comes up to you to take you home and your coworker protectively stands in front of you, he just stands there, feeling shocked for a brief moment, sneering before softening his eyes at the sight of you stepping towards him and hugging him tightly.

maybe it was the presence of your coworker entirely, or maybe it was the coworker asking you if sirius was simply your friend that made him want to steal you away every time you went on a break to fuck you stupid.

suddenly, sirius didn’t just visit your workplace to drop you off or pick you up. he began forcing you to text him the time you went break so that he could drag you to the staff bathroom for a nice, “quick,” 30-minute fuck. he practically has the bathroom code memorized with how many times he’s fucked you in it.

he would sit there for a while, clicking his ring-clad fingers against the table, bouncing his knees—doing anything to relieve him of his impatience. sirius would silently reel at the apprehension written all over your face and the flush on your cheeks as your coworkers or customers would speak with you. upon your break beginning, you could barely manage to kiss your boyfriend on the lips before he yanked you away to the employee bathroom.

‘why does he have to touch you so much, hm?’ he’d mutter bitterly, hastily lifting your skirt and pushing your panties to the side, simpering at the slick on his fingers as he dragged his fingers up your slit, slowly circling his middle finger over your gushing hole. ‘just touching you for no good reason.’

you would furrow your eyebrows at the agonizing feeling and hum in agreement with the man behind you. the hard porcelain of the sink was pressing painfully against your hips and your heart was beating rapidly, your mind only praying that people at work hadn’t caught on to the employee bathroom being occupied for thirty whole minutes nearly every day.

‘don’t know, siri,’ you’d mumble while sighing breathlessly, feeling flush at the sight of sirius staring at you intensely from the washroom mirror, studying your facial expressions while smiling in amusement at your bashfulness.

sirius would smile broadly at the sight of you sinking your teeth into the back of your hand, a useless and insufficient attempt in muffling your cries as he hammered into you from behind, watching you take the extra step to turn on the sink faucet to conceal the loud, echoing sounds of skin slapping as he thrust into you. he would exhibit a shit-eating grin, lazily staring at your eyes welled up with tears of humiliation at the lewd, moist sounds of you creaming around his cock with each rut.

sirius’s pace is unforgiving and relentless, and all the while, he would tug on your hair to jerk your head back so he could bite and suck on your neck, leaving bruised, mean marks along the side of your throat that he makes certain will show.

‘sluts like you love getting fucked in places like this, huh? just imagine what they’d think—your little friends,’ sirius breathed shakily, feeling his mind go numb at the feeling of your drenched cunt pulsating around his thick, throbbing cock.

‘does that git know what a fuckin’ slut you are for me? does he know that this cunt gets filled up every second of every day?’

‘‘s like you can’t get enough—fuck—i’m sure he can’t fuck you like this—oh—satisfy all your needs like me, yeah?’

sirius is the epitome of mean and truly does not give a fuck about what anything else thinks. he would purposely pull your hand away from your mouth, letting your moans spill uncontrollably from your mouth, echoing inside the enclosed space of the washroom.

he wants that “fucker”—according to sirius—to hear the way you lose your mind with his cock inside you. sirius would only laugh softly at the sight of your head dropping helplessly, tears spilling down your cheeks, lips parted with pants escaping them at the feeling of his cock brushing against the sweet spots inside your cunt.

‘need more. i don’t think i have enough time, sirius,’ you’d mewl. ‘please go harder.’

sirius would not care if this was cutting into your work time but he’s more than happy to fuck you harder and faster. he’s not stopping until he’s pleased and you're fucked out—eyes rolling back, and throat worn out from your loud moans. he could care less if your break was finished or if someone was banging on the door, begging to use the washroom—he’s finished when he’s finished.

‘cunts taking me so well, i’m definitely not stopping. ‘n i’m sure my girl doesn’t want me to either—not when you’re so close, yeah?’

and speaking of him talking to you in french . . . he knows you get off to his dirty talk, so him speaking in a language you can’t understand—hearing how you whine at the feeling of being unaware of his thoughts and his words only make the knot in his stomach tighter.

secretly, sirius is mumbling cheesy shit like, ‘i love you,’ or ‘you’re so pretty,’ to save himself from the embarrassment of saying soft things so contradicting to his fronting personality.

also, this is sirius. we all know that he’s working to the fucking bone to make sure he cums inside you and that his seed is buried deep inside your tight little cunt. without a doubt, he’s saving a little bit of his cum for your panties, cumming all over them, dampening the cotton fabric so that when you put them back on after getting dressed, your cunt would be stained and sticky from his seed, leaving you uncomfortable all day at the feeling of your wet, soiled underwear.

i think, if we are truly wanting to appreciate and hate the essence of mean bf ! sirius, i fear that he’s gonna pull out of you the very last second, when your one thrust away from cumming, watching and reeling as you sob at the lost contact, unconsciously wiggling your bum to entice him to take you again and help you find your release. he needs to make sure your cunt aches and longs for him, yearning the feeling of his long cock thrusting inside relentlessly.

‘no—fuck—please, sirius!’ you’d sob, shoving your head against his chest and hitting him weakly with your fist. ‘feel so empty, siri—please. it hurts so bad.’

sirius almost succumbed at the sight of your trembling pout and your longing, teary eyes. unfortunately, he persevered against temptation and pressed a gentle, tender kiss on your temple before pulling away and helping you get dressed again. he would coo and wipe away your tears, laughing to himself at the sight of your glare and your thighs rubbing against each other in an attempt to find relief and ease your aching, empty cunt.

‘when i pick you up, puppy,’ he’d pull you into a deep kiss, firmly gripping the back of your neck. ‘i’ll fuck you and make you cum as much as you want. good girls wait, yeah?’

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writtenbymoonflower · 3 months

Note

Hello, author-san! How are you? Could I please request some angst for the poly!marauders, where R is someone full of tattoos or piercings but is smart, a sweetheart, golden retriever coded, and Lily is their friend. Lily knows about their infatuation with the boys. Being a great friend, Lily wants to set them up, but they're a bit uncertain about R because of their tattoos. Then one night, R overhears them talking in the common room with Lily and voices out their opinions regarding R, causing R to become insecure and try to hide it. You can continue however you like! Angst with a happy ending if it's okay! 🥺

Thank you, author-san!

💀🌻

Thanks for requesting sweetheart! Sorry it took so long, hope this is okay! gn!reader x poly!marauders, pre-relationship

cw: prejudice associated with tattoos and piercings, swearing, angst to happy ending

1.8k words (oopsie)

It was like you could hear their words on repeat as you raced up the stairs. What hurt the most is that you knew that some people would judge, but you hadn’t expected it from them.

“I just don’t know about 'em, Lils.” James winced. “Like they seem nice, but you know about people who choose to look at that…” He trailed off.

“I’m sure they’re not all bad.” Sirius cut in, clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. “But Prongs does have a point.”

“It’s just the impulsivity of it all.” Remus reasoned. “Like if you’re making rash choices like that, what else would you do.”

That was when you left your hiding spot in the stairs and ran back to your dorm. You could hear Lily’s ‘I’m so fucking done with you being stupid’ voice as you trailed away, making you smile at the knowledge that you had such a good friend.

But you had heard enough. They had clearly made their minds up about you. Besides, you knew your appearance was an… acquired taste, to say the least, and you couldn’t expect them to be with someone they weren’t attracted to. You didn’t think you looked that odd, but maybe your perception was skewed. No matter whose perception was more accurate, they clearly didn’t particularly like you, and it was probably best to keep your distance for now, at least until they really got to know you.

You knew that your appearance didn’t really match your personality. People often assumed you were rude, a slacker, confrontational, or even hateful. But the opposite was true in fact. You always made good marks, you were friends with loads of people, always trying to be as open as possible. And yeah, some people were intimidated at first, but they usually warmed up very quickly.

Apparently those three, the three you wanted the approval of the most, had not been as warm about you as you thought.

You crawled into bed and curled into yourself, trying to get a few hours of sleep before breakfast.

James yawned loudly, blinking his eyes rapidly to get rid of the sleepy, fuzzy film coating them. Him and his boyfriends had been up all night, getting lectured literally until the sun came up.

He had to admit, it was for the best. All three boys had gone to bed, feeling thoroughly corrected. Even slipping into shame.

“What the hell is wrong with you three?” Lily whisper-yelled. “James, you are the LAST person to say anything about appearances. Remember when I had to go around convincing people you hadn’t become mean after your growth spurt in fourth year? Just because you were big and scary and you hadn’t realized how you were coming across?” She scolded, before turning her head to the mouse-haired boy sitting by the fire. “And you,” She seethed. “You have no clue if her choices were ‘rash’ or not. I’ve heard plenty of rumors about your appearance, people saying similar things about you. About your ‘aggression’ just because they don’t know what’s going on with you.” She snapped her head over to Sirius, her fiery hair flipping around from the movement. “And Sirius, you’re just overcompensating because you’re jealous! You’re not fooling anyone, you would look like that in an instant if you could. You’re just too scared to do it.”

Sirius played with his thumbs, not able to dispute the accusations. None of the boys could actually. Lily could tell, she was satisfied with her work.

“I love you three buggers,” She pressed a friendly kiss to each of their cheeks as she stormed upstairs. “You just need to stop being such idiots.”

Sirius didn’t think anyone could change personalities that fast, but it seemed all three boys had woken up different people. That morning they had all just nodded to each other, acknowledging that their opinions were very different than they had been 24 hours ago and all walked shamefacedly down to breakfast. Sirius kept pushing his eggs around his plate, too busy staring at you to take a bite. You looked a lot different today. Your hair was ruffled in front of your face, hiding the metal glinting on your nose and eyebrow. You also had long sleeves and pants on, covering the ink detailing your skin. You still hadn’t waved at them, or even acknowledged the boys’ existence. Usually, you would be bouncing over to them, talking about the weather or whatever was on your mind at the moment. Sirius missed it if he was honest with himself. He was disappointed, he had been excited to show you his outfit. He crafted it with you in mind, teasing his hair up extra and being a bit more outlandish with his top, even stealing Marlene’s varnish to paint his nails.

Remus missed your interest in the latest book he had read. You always had so many interesting questions and you listened so intently. He missed how you played with the hoop in your septum as you nodded along to his plot summaries. You were always so patient and careful, it made his heart crack.

James was equally distraught. He had always prided himself on being open and friends with everyone, and he had considered you his friend, which just made him feel worse. He knew that stereotyping people never led to anything good, especially when someone's personality was completely ignored and replaced with caricature. Yes, you did look intimidating, but he actually liked it. It accentuated how soft your personality actually was. You were like a big dog that everyone was terrified of, but in reality was scared of butterflies and just wanted to love everyone. He laughed sadly, catching the other two boys' attention as he stared longingly at you. All he wanted to do was go over there, but you were completely ignoring them, so he figured it was best to just not bother you and continue on with his breakfast.

You were being equally as forlorn, continually sneaking glances over at the boys. They looked quiet and tired, but no less handsome. You felt sick, moving to leave your breakfast and all but run to the library. You needed to study anyway, you had become so infatuated that you were ignoring your classes. You had barely made it down the corridor before you heard three sets of panicked footsteps, quickly catching up to you. You tried to walk faster, but unfortunately Remus had very long legs and he briskly made it in front of you, trapping you in. He was looking flushed, amber eyes focusing on you way too much for comfort.

“Y/N,” He sounded out of breath. You fixed your face down and back, away from their gaze. You stopping had allowed the other two the opportunity to catch up, and soon you were face-to-face with all three of the people who apparently disliked you, but to your dismay, you were still completely attached to.

“You guys okay?” You asked, as kindly as ever but far quieter than they were used to.

“We’re fine, lovely.” James said, confused. “Are you okay?”

“I’m good.” You muttered, shifting your feet.

“Babe,” Sirius scoffed. Your heart jumped at the honorific, but you quickly scolded yourself. Sirius just called everyone that. You had heard what he, what all three of them had said last night. “You ran from there like bat outta’ hell.” He said like you were being ridiculous.

“And you haven’t spoken to us all day.” Remus cut in before you could respond.

“It’s only seven.” You mumbled.

“Still odd.” James quipped, moving ever so slightly closer to you. “You’re not okay.” He said, with enough finality that you gave up the act all together. They really weren’t going to make this easy on you. They said all those things last night, but they were still going to put you through the misery of having to listen to them say all those things directly to you.

You sighed dejectedly, starting to pick your nails. “Look okay,” You tore the words from the back of your throat. “I know that you don’t like me or don’t think I’m nice or whatever. You don’t have to talk to me, it’s okay.” You did your best to give them a reassuring smile, even managing for water to stay out of your eyes, but their expressions didn’t make it easy. Sirius cursed and pinched the bridge of his nose, James looked like a kicked puppy, and Remus was hiding his eyes from you. You started to walk away, but you were blocked in.

“Shit, you heard last night?” Sirius winced. You nodded painfully, looking back down at your shoes. The silent tension was so thick you felt it suffocating you. James was the first to do anything, wordlessly striding over to pull you into a bone-crushing hug. You stumbled from the shock, easing into him accidentally, but you made no moves to tense away. You limply wrapped your arms around his waist.

“I’m so sorry, angel.” He said, panicked. “I was so stupid, I- I never should’ve said it I don’t know what I was even thinking.” He pulled you tighter to him, enough that you were worried of your feet leaving the ground.

“I’m sorry too.” Sirius said, much more morosely than usual. “Never should’ve said those things, and you never should've heard it either.”

“We’re all sorry.” Remus said firmly. “We all know better, we should’ve known not to think that way. It’s awfully closed-minded. You’re our friend, we should’ve acted like it.”

“It’s okay.” You squeezed out.

“No.” Sirius said sharply. “It’s not okay. I don’t know if you heard what Lily said back, but she pointed out a lot of things, and I can promise that we don’t think that way anymore.”

“Please, please forgive us, baby. We were so wrong. You’re so kind and smart and funny and gorgeous an-” James was rambling on and on.

“Jamie, it’s okay. I know you’re sorry.” You giggled at his panicked tone. “Can you uh- you’re kinda crushing me.”

“Shit! Sorry.” He released you quickly, but not before slicking your hair out of your face. You just laughed, feeling ten times lighter.

“We’re okay.” You reassured. “I forgive you all, it hurt, but it seems like you are all beating yourselves up enough.”

“Jus’ feel bad.” Remus grabbed you unexpectedly, tugging you into his arms. He wasn’t squeezing you like James, but rather greedily absorbing your touch. This felt like a big deal, you almost never saw Remus hold anyone.

“Don’t feel bad.” You pleaded. “Everything’s fine now.” You rubbed his back in a way you hoped was soothing. You felt him relax in your arms.

“Okay stop hogging them.” Sirius tugged Remus out of the way, making him grunt in dissatisfaction. (You pretended to not notice the sneaky kiss Sirius pressed to the taller boy’s knuckles.) “It’s my turn.” He grabbed you with loving aggression.

“I wasn’t hogging.” Remus quipped.

“Yeah, you were.” Sirius sassed. “Besides, I was the biggest idiot. I need to give the biggest cwtch.” His reasoning was flawed, but you settled into him nonetheless.

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