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callofdudes · 8 months

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Best idea

Y/n had to go MIA/KIA to keep the 141 safe, once Simon founds out angry cause he mourned for his best friend only to find out their alive and in hiding, demanded platonic cuddles as their “punishment”

Ok, I'm gonna get the brain juices running for this one. Another one based off a story my bestie @itsscromp and I did. But I changed it up. Hope you enjoy, it's longer than I anticipated it being.

Also, I should have fully expected the repercussions of letting you guys vote Egg as a callsign... but I'ma still use it.

Where did you go??

Summary: They thought you were gone, dead. Turns out you were under their noses and a call away the whole time.

Cw: Angst. Nothing much else.

Your mission had gone... Well for lack of a better word it went to shit. Whole thing blew up. An ambush, a bomb, it would be a long road to explain what all in all happened but it did, and now you were paying for it. It had gotten so bad they couldn't pull you from the junction you were stuck in.

You were supposed to be infiltrating an old base which had become home to a drug ring. But no one happened to mention the mines you'd step on and fuck up your leg with. Or the live wire that alerted the whole base after said mine went off.

So now this entire base was up in arms, you have a broken leg and probably other damage. You were lucky your leg hadn't been blown off.

And to be quite frank, these men were extremely dangerous which meant your fuck up was astronomical. The second they found you you were probably going to die.

So you commed into Price, telling him your situation.

"Alright Egg, I'm going to go in on foot and bring you back to the helicopter just hang tight soldier."

"Yes sir." You lay down, catching your breath and willing yourself not to look at your leg because if it felt bad it probably looked bad too.

Not twenty minutes later Price was approaching your form, bending down to check on you. "You broken??"

"Yeah I'm pretty sure... I don't want to look though."

Price nodded, tucking his gun away and grabbed your arms. "Alright, up we go," he hauled you up into his arms, hefting you over his shoulder and going back the way he came. Just... A little quicker this time since things were looking good for the oppositions infantry.

Price brought you back to the helicopter where you were bandaged up. The mission could have been better planned so they didn't end up sending another team out.

Price had the team drop you off near some loading stations far off the location of the base.

"What... Are we doing here??"

Price got out of the helicopter and checked your leg before pulling you out with him. "I can't bring you back to base. It's a security risk if I do..."

You frowned. "What do you mean?? Where am I going then??"

"There's a secure underground safehouse that will keep you hidden. It's got the provisions you need and the people you need. They'll keep quiet and keep you safe. For now, for however long, I need you to lay low."

You opened your mouth to protest but then shut it again. "I understand. Will I get to see the others..?"

"No, you are not to contact them in any way at all. Until I contact you, you are to remain on the downlow."

Your head falls slightly, but you nod. "Alright, I can do that."

Price nodded and patted your shoulder. He picked you up and helped you into the truck waiting for you. "They'll take care of you. I'll contact you as soon as it's safe. If I do not contact you do not contact us. Got it?"

You nod once again, taking the instructions to heart. You wouldn't be able to contact Ghost, Soap or Gaz. You wouldn't be able to contact anyone. But you knew this was for the best.

So with a last goodbye Price closed the door to the truck and the soldier in the driver's seat drove down the empty road out of the landing space.

"How long will we be gone??"

"Until we get the word from Captain Price. Don't worry. It'll be kept under wraps..."

...

Price returned to the base, taking a deep breath and having had time to figure everything out. He immediately called the others into a meeting.

Considering you and Price weren't supposed to be back for the rest of the day, or even two days or more the meeting was seen as urgent.

Ghost was there first, the sergeants following his trail as they came into the office. "Price... What are you doing back?" Ghost asked sternly, hands clasped tightly as if ready for action at a moments notice.

"Relax... There won't be any fighting. I need you all to sit."

Soap threw Gaz a concerned look as they sat. "Where is y/n, are they still out there??"

Price straightened his posture. He didn't exactly want to lie to his own men, but he'd done worse and he knew this was completely for the best.

"The mission didn't go well as soon as we went in."

Ghost frowned. "Didn't go well?? These drug traders could be connected to Shepherd's on power, how did it wrong??"

"Ghost, relax." Price replied firmly. "I realize that we didn't think this over as well as we should have... Their base was much more protected than we originally thought so Egg went in blind."

"So what happened? Did you pull them??" Ghost was growing more agitated the longer they sat there.

"They commed in about an exploded mine and... We couldn't find them."

The room grew quiet. Soap and Gaz shared concerned looks as Gaz spoke up. "Did you do a full search? We're they hidden in the dirt or something and you missed??"

Price shook his head. "Too risky to go on foot and search. We didn't know how many more mines were out there." Only a small white lie, but a lie nonetheless.

Ghost squared in his chair. "Then we need to go find them. What are we sitting here for just waiting-!"

"Ghost, if they are safe they'll comm in. For now I can't risk sending men in there with the base on high alert and their supposed boss on speed dial. So for now we sit down and we wait to see if Egg comes back with anything."

Ghost was boiling up underneath. Feelings of rage that Price couldn't have waiting a little longer. Worry because they left you out there probably still alive... And fear. Because what if you weren't alive.

"I won't make any calls on it now, but this is where we are at so remain patient. I'm doing what I can to sort this out." Price had to rewire this plan to keep all of his men safe. All of his soldiers, including you.

"Dismissed."

The air was tense when everyone left. The idea you were out there alone, still alive and possibly if not injured and with no help. It scared them all.

Gaz was the first to try and get in contact with you. But any of his efforts were proving ineffective.

Soap just had to wait it out. To hope they could find you or you could find them in time.

Ghost... Ghost didn't know what to think. He knew you were capable. He knew if you were alive then you'd comm in. Once you were safe he knew you would make contact. You could protect yourself... He had to believe you would be ok.

That mentality lasted right up until a week later when Price called everyone back in to pronounce you MIA. Stamped on a card to your file and just like that, they truly had zero traces of you.

They were devastated. A week and no turn of anything from you. This is when Simon started to call your phone. Leaving you text messages.

He couldn't sleep because all his thoughts and dreams were of you. Hoping you were ok and alive. That hope was dying, waking up in cold sweats on nights he could close his eyes for even a moment.

Clutching his beating heart while his body rattled with panic, phone pressed to his ear only to hear your voice over the same simple voice mail as ever.

He couldn't be without you. You were a crucial part of his life. Of his mission. He couldn't just abandon that connection. You had to be alive.

Price cut communication with the safe house you were being taken care of. Unless it was an emergency Price knew not of your condition, only that you were safe. He too was worried, bouncing around through meetings and talking with Laswell and this and that and the other thing.

Trying to figure out what to do now that they needed a new plan and how long they could wait to re-infiltrate.

Simon had started leaving you voicemails, not knowing if he'd ever hear your voice again.

"Hey, this is Y/n, I'm currently busy but please try to leave a message so I can get back to you!"

Simon laid awake, staring up at the ceiling as he held the phone to his ear.

"Y/n.... If you can hear me you gotta respond. Please, I don't know if you'll ever hear these again but if you're somewhere out there I know you're alive. Anything, please, I..." He closed his eyes, thinking back to the last time he saw you. Taking off in that helicopter, a pat on the shoulder and a good luck...

"I miss you. And I'm not giving up on you. I'm not." He wouldn't cry... He wouldn't cry. He would not cry.

"I'm going to come find you. I know somewhere you're still alive. Even if their torturing you I promise I won't leave you out there to die you hear me."

Tears rolled down his cheeks and he covered his eyes, curling up on his bed. "I know you hear me...." He choked out. "I know you can hear me...." He stares at the phone. "Please Y/n.... Please, anything..."

He stared at the phone, waiting like you would magically pick up and reassure him even for a second that you were ok and alive and even if you weren't thriving you were still breathing.

But no...

The voicemail lasted for over an hour. Simon laid there, staring at him phone, unable to bring himself to hang up again.

His thumb hovered over the phone. He wanted to say one last thing... He opened his mouth, but he hesitated. His eyes downcast and one last tear rolled down his cheek as he ended the call once again. Only to face another restless night of no sleep.

By the eighth month mark you were pronounced KIA.

Simon had pretty much known by that point. He'd lost his best friend but he had been in denial until Price told them. They couldn't find a trace of you. No body, no tags, no clothes, no weapon. You had simply... Vanished.

Simon continues to mourn all while you were still being held up in that underground safehouse. Sitting on the small rickety bed, watching the higher ranked soldiers also staying watch at the safehouse talk in the other room.

It was beyond difficult. No contact with outside, you ate, slept, the others tended to your leg and occasionally sparred with you to help you back on your feet.

You missed your team. Your friends. Your family.

You listened to every single voicemail Simon sent. You couldn't reply. Couldn't text him back or even pick up the phone for a second to let him know you were ok.

You remained radio silent.

Even as you'd lay awake at night with your phone replaying the voicemail, listening to the recorded lapse of Simon's breathing while he stared at the phone with an empty, sorrowful expression from the other side.

You missed him so much. You wanted to see them again. But you couldn't. Not yet. Would you ever get to see them again?? They couldn't leave you down here forever.

There was a brief knock on your door as one of the sergeants nodded to you. "Food is ready, new supply just came in."

You nod, pausing the voicemail. "Thanks... I'll be out in a minute."

You sighed, turning off your phone and tucking it away, praying that you'd see them soon.

...

Simon had lost you. Didn't even get a chance to protect you. It had gotten to the point where his lack of sleep would lead to seeing figures of you disappear down hallways. In a spark of hope and joy he'd rush to find you only to find nothing...

On the off days he'd run into a recruit or a sergeant wandering the halls. As soon as they would turn around though... The illusion would shatter.

His own mind was killing him from the inside. Sending you hundred and hundreds of text messages. Every morning and night, rants about his day and what he was feeling. If he was going to pour everything out like you'd ever see it he did it now.

Knowing you'd never pick that phone up again, knowing you'd never look him in the eyes again. Knowing he'd never hear your voice or feel your touch or know your comfort ever again.

This drove him further and further into the spiral. Price had never seen Simon beat up the punching bag so much he bled all over it. He'd never seen Simon get snappy and angry I'm split decisions like he did.

He'd never seen Simon grow so desperate and over protective of Johnny and Kyle. Because Simon's new fear was he'd lose them just like he lost you...

This went on for the next three months after that. Nearly a year since you'd died and they were back out on that minefield. A proper plan, a new way in, a new goal.

Simon was desperate to tear that base apart and even find a trace of your body. Even just a piece of your clothing or your signature engraved gun hanging in their armory somewhere.

But in the end he was left with no more questions answered than when he first entered that meeting room eleven months ago.

Simon had followed the trail to the last thread. The main office of that base. Pulling open every drawer and every cabinet.

"Lt stop you're making a mess-!"

"There's got to be a file or something here! There fucking has to be!"

"Ghost stop we found the information we needed. We have the shipments contained the base is clear what could you be looking for??" Gaz asked, trying to understand what had gotten Ghost in such a frenzy.

"A kill list or an interrogation chart. Anything."

"For what Simon!?"

"For Y/n!!" Simon snapped at them both. Breathing heavy as he finishes emptying every drawer in that office.

Price stood silently in the doorway. Enough time had passed. He wouldn't put them through this anymore.

"Come on lads... I think it's time I show you something."

Their attention turned on to him. Simon was almost vibrating with rage and anxiety. He just wanted any knowledge of what happened. He knew you were dead but his soul was restless without knowing. He needed to know...

They left, Price piled them in the helicopter and the ride back was silent. Simon stared at his hands the whole time. Soap fidgeted, knee bouncing and chewing his lip anxiously.

Gaz picked at the loose strap of his gun, also attempting to distract himself from the elephant in the room.

When the helicopter landed they weren't on base. They landed on the small helipad you had been brought to some some before. Price got out, motioning the other three to follow.

"Where are we Price??" Soap looked around, not recognizing the place.

"You'll know soon enough." Price brought them to a truck, talking with the officer in charge of the station before climbing in the driver's seat.

The sergeants got comfy in the back and Simon slipped into the passenger seat. His eyes remained fixed on the passenger window, watching the open land pass by and the fields of undisturbed flowers and wildlife.

What if he had found you here? May you would have liked that better. Surrounded by the flowers and the soft blowing breeze instead of wherever your body lay, ashes or not.

He turned away, fixing his eyes to the dashboard to try and distract himself.

The ride was quiet once again. Lasting about an hour and a half before Price stopped, parking the vehicle outside a small outpost of sorts. It wasn't build very high off the ground and was concealed by trees and wildlife.

"A safehouse. Why cannae we jus' go home??" Soap asked as he jumped out of the vehicle with the others.

"I'd prefer we made a stop here." Price said, leading them to the entrance where surpisingly a soldier was there to bring them in.

"Occupied? Now there's something new." Gaz whispered to Soap.

Simon didn't understand why they were even making this stupid trip. He wanted to go back to base. He wanted to hide once again like he always did.

"Captain Price, welcome back." The soldier shook Price's hand and walked them further inside.

"Sergeant! Their here for you!" The soldier called out, walking to one of the small rooms where you were. Where you spent most of your time.

You looked up. Who was here for you?? Your eyes widened. Them, your team! It had to be them they were back!

You pushed off your bed, leaning into your good leg and moved faster than you had in almost a year. Turning the corner and there they were. Price, Simon, Johnny, Kyle. All of them.

But.... This wasn't the hopeful reunion you'd pictured in your head over and over again. No one moved. The thought of Simon rushing the hug you didn't come true as he didn't move.

Price walked over, embracing you. "Good to see you again sergeant." You hugged him tightly, so good to be held by him, embraced by Price again. You'd missed him so much.

Johnny was the second one to snap out of it, running over and wrapping his arms around you tightly. "What the hell is wrong with you doing this! You had us all sick and worried and heartbroken!!"

"It wasn't my plan... I'm sorry." You hugged Johnny back. "I'm so sorry Soap, I'm so sorry." Johnny couldn't stop his tears, not wanting to let go in fear you'd slip away again.

Gaz followed, hugging you tighter than you'd ever felt him do before. You'd never seen Gaz openly cry but he was balling, sobbing as he hugged you tightly.

"We thought you were dead, captain told us you were dead!"

"I had to do it to protect them... To protect all of us." Price knew this would probably take a bit for them all to come to terms and forgive him for, but it had to be done.

When the others were done cooing and coddling over you, there was just Simon left.

He felt alone. He felt cold and separated. He felt like he wasn't a part of the same bubble as the others... He watched them embrace and kiss and love on you... You. It was you.

You turned to him, but Simon didn't move. He didn't know if he could. He felt so consumed by his darkness and his grief it didn't allow him to step into the light.

He'd consumed himself so much if he touched you he felt he might burn. That you fall like sand from his fingertips and the illusion would shatter...

"Simon...." You whisper, stepping toward him, causing Simon to step back.

You could see the fear in his eyes. The lack of trust, the amount of hurt, the pain he must have went through to have one of his lifelines ripped away and then thrust back into his life suddenly like it was fine.

"I'm... I'm sorry Simon I didn't mean to hurt you. I listened to every voicemail you sent. I knew every text that went through. But I...."

"You could have told me you were fine! You could have told me you were ok!! Bullshit that you couldn't!! Bullshit!!" Simon thundered.

You remained silent. Simon glared at Price. This was his fault. You'd been taken away without warning. He could have kept it a secret he could have carried that knowledge and not been out through a years worth of fire from hell!

Simon threw his gun to the ground, not even carrying as he left again.

"Lieutenant! Simon!" Price called after him as Simon left the safehouse.

You placed your hand on Price's chest. "Don't... It's ok. Let me help him."

Price looked down. But he nodded.

You left the safehouse, finding Simon around the corner huddled up, shaky hands trying to light a cigarette to get his nerves to calm down and his mind to clear up.

"You hid from me." He cursed, acting like he was seconds from spitting your name into the dirt and squashing it. But you knew. You knew inside he was hurting more than anyone else on the team.

You knelt beside him, gently taking the lighter from his hands. "I never meant to hurt you. If I didn't have strict orders from Price I would have contact you right away."

"Why couldn't he have at least told us you were ok. That you were alive."

"I... I don't know Simon, you'll have to ask Price about that one. But I promise I never meant to hurt you. I listened to every voicemail, I didn't give up. I can see the pain it caused you."

You moved closer, slipping into his arms and hugging him tightly. The second you wrapped your arms around him. He felt your weight, your warmth, your heart pounding in your chest against his own.

Simon finally looked at you, tears spilling down his cheeks. He was shattered. So hurt from losing you.

"You fuckin' abandoned me!!"

"I didn't abandon you Simon. You know I would have picked up and came running back even if my leg was missing."

He knew it was true. But he was so... So angry and torn and upset. He wanted to scream and fight and he felt so small and helpless.

The real you.

Not some illusion passing corners or drifting through his peripherals. The you he could touch and hold and protect.

His arms wrapped around you tightly, never letting go of you even once. He didn't stop those tears as he pulled you impossibly closer.

"I'm here Simon. I'm not leaving again ok? I'm right here."

He remained silent, crying as he held onto you. Hiding his face in the crook of your neck. It felt like hours passed. It felt like time slowed. What felt like two hours was twenty minutes when he finally pulled away enough to look at your face.

To see the light in your glimmering eyes, to see every feature of your face that made you, you.

His sergeant. His teammate. His family.

You smiled softly, gently pulling up his mask off his head to cup his cheeks, rubbing your thumb gently over the dimple in his cheek you've seen when he shows you his smile.

"Smudged your paint a little bit," You whisper. "Let's get that fixed." You gently brush your finger over his face, feeling him start to relax at that familiar and missed touch as you fix the paint around his eyes.

"There we go. How can I help Simon. What will help make this better?"

Simon tried to flick away the rest of his tears, huffing softly. "Cuddles. And you are not allowed to say no after what you put me through. This is your punishment for making me go through that shit!"

You chuckle. "Oh, cuddles with Simon, scary. I'll pay the fine, I'll do all the punishment time of cuddles you request. Sound good?"

Simon nods his head.

"Ok, well how about we go inside now? I could use some cuddles too."

You were about to get up when Simon hugged you again. "I'm glad you're ok..."

You smiled softly, kissing the top of his head. "I am too Simon." You help his mask back on and the two of you head inside.

Simon would let out his feelings to Price sometime later when his head felt less foggy. For now, he was content to crash on the rickety old safehouse bed and koala cling to you till kingdom come.

Nuzzling up and holding you tightly, not letting you go for even a itty bitty millisecond.

And you were fine with that. You were glad you could be back with your family. Simon was glad to welcome you back. You'd be serving a lot of cuddle prison time. A strenuous task, but one all too rewarding.

Running your hand down the back of his head, scratching his back to help him relax and set himself at ease.

All he needed was to koala crush your soul into his soul, and then he'd be ok. Slowly, his eyes started to close after the exhaustion of the mission, but he fought to keep them open.

"I'll be right here when you wake up. I promise, I won't be going anywhere." You whisper to him.

"You promise?"

"I double swear it. I won't leave. I'll be right here."

He snuggled you impossibly closer and let his eyes close. He let his mind rest. His heart soak in you and heal. Slowly you could help mend what has fallen apart.

And cuddles were never a bad place to start...

#simon ghost riley #call of duty #ghost x reader #captain john price #simon ghost riley x reader #kyle gaz garrick #johnny soap mactavish #john soap mactavish #captain john price x reader #platonic x reader #cod modern warfare

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golden-cherry · 1 year

Text

deal - cl16 (3/?)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.

Chapter Summary: Charles takes you on an adventure, that you won't forget that easily.

Warnings: angst (talks about Charles dad), comfort, google translated French

Word Count: 3.4k

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A/N: part 3! hope you enjoy it! feedback is appreciated!

Sitting on the passenger side of your own car is strange.

It doesn't feel completely wrong, but still, a queasy feeling spreads through you. Like when you lived with your parents. Whenever someone was visiting, your mom had said, "Just sit anywhere," and of course the guests didn't know that you had an unassigned assigned seat. And when they actually sat down in your seat and you couldn't sit in yours, you had the same feeling as you do now at this moment.

After you dressed for the weather, you grabbed your car keys and your camera. If Charles was actually taking you to the most beautiful viewpoint in the country, then maybe you could snap some pictures for your private Instagram account. Your little private photo album. With no followers, no obligations.

Charles car is at his primary residence, according to his statement. Except for a few cars, the underground garage where your car is parked is empty. Your roommate insisted on driving because, first, you don't know where the trip is going and, second, he doesn't want to tell you where to go. Grumpily, you threw him the key and he caught it with a grin.

Then Charles made himself comfortable in the driver's seat of your old Renault as if it were his birthright. Right hand on the wheel, left elbow on the door and head propped on his hand, he maneuvers you through the streets of Monaco. Black sunglasses sit on his nose and the radio plays a pop song that somehow gets played every time you get in the car. Charles whistles along with the rhythm.

You turn in his direction. "Are you going to tell me where exactly we're going?"

Instead of answering you, he just shakes his head briefly. He runs a hand through his brown hair once, whistling merrily along.

You roll your eyes and rub your forehead.

Not only did you just get in the car with a stranger - to be fair, it's your car and Charles isn't a stranger (anymore) - but he actually won't tell you where he's going. "Like I said, we're going to the most beautiful view," is all he replies.

You've looked it up. According to Google, there are about fifteen lookouts. And each of them is supposed to be the "most beautiful view in Monaco," according to the websites. You looked up the locations on Google Maps, but none of them are in the direction you're heading. Maybe he's trying to kill you after all.

"I haven't driven a real stick shift car in ages." Charles wraps his big hand around the gearshift knob to shift into the next gear. His bracelets slide from his forearm to his wrist as he does so. Without much jerking and very smoothly, you move forward.

You raise an eyebrow. "So you only drive automatic cars?"

Charles shakes his head. "My personal car - the one that's at my other apartment - is an automatic. The company car I drive is manual." His hand moves from the shift knob back to the steering wheel. His long fingers grip the worn, dark leather.

"So what do you prefer to drive?"

He shrugs. "I like both."

You purse your lips and look out the window. You drive past small boutiques whose clothes you could never afford, and see cars whose insurance per month is sure to exceed your former annual salary. But this is nothing new to you. This is Monaco, after all. "I've never driven an automatic car before."

Charles glances over at you for a moment. "Really?" You shake your head. "It's kind of like riding a bumper car. Two pedals, gas and brake." He has to grin. "But if you ever drive automatic, please don't crash into other road users."

"Haha."

Charles drives the car out of town. The view out the window changes from old houses, whose architecture enchants you every time, to rocks and trees. By now, a quiet song is playing on the radio, Charles has stopped whistling, and somehow you're enjoying sitting here, next to your roommate, who wants to show you new, exciting things.

It's been ages since you've been introduced to something completely new.

The brunette turns off the main road onto a path that you would have missed yourself. It's not paved, which is why the car jolts quite a bit as you drive along. Trees and bushes line the path, and it is so narrow that it would be quite difficult if another car were to come towards you. If you were driving, you would have peed your pants for sure.

But not Charles. He drives as if he were driving this route every day. He knows where there are big rocks that he has to drive around to avoid damaging your car - which wouldn't be so dramatic - and also where he has to countersteer to avoid driving over potholes deeper than the Mariana Trench.

When he stops after a few minutes, he turns off the car. Then he turns to you and takes off his sunglasses. "I know this place looks pretty shady, and I can understand if you don't trust me. But if you get out of here with me now, I promise you, you won't regret it." He pulls the key out of the ignition. "Unfortunately, we can't get any further here by car. That's why we have to continue on foot for a short while. If you want."

You took a leap of faith when you decided to drive here with him. And he didn't try to kill you last night. That's a big plus. And that's why you hold out your hand to him without giving it much thought. "As long as I can have the key."

A smile spreads across his face as he drops it into your hand. "Let's do it, then."

Charles wasn't lying - it's actually not a long walk. You walk side by side in silence, the key held tightly in your hand. There's not a whole lot of sunlight shining down on you through the trees, and you regret not taking a thicker jacket. You didn't expect it to be so cold in the shade.

And then you arrive. At the most beautiful view in Monaco.

You're standing on a small hill that can't be seen from the main road. There is a single tree here, which is why the sun can shine relentlessly on you despite the winter, warming the skin on your face. You take a few steps forward, not realizing that Charles is not following you as you take in the view.

From here, from this beautiful spot, you can actually overlook all of Monaco. The houses, the yachts, the luxury for which this country is famous. But you don't only see the typical postcard Monaco. You also see the green of the forests, small blue bays of the Côte d'Azur, which you have never seen - neither in reality nor on the Internet - and the Mediterranean Sea, which stretches out in front of you and whose sound you can hear despite the distance.

You feel Charles next to you, but can't tear your gaze away from the view. "It's..." You can't think of a suitable word to describe what you're looking at. None of the million words, both in English and the few in French, would do it justice.

"I know." His voice rings softly in your ears. "Shall we sit down?"

You settle down near the tree. The meadow is dry - thank goodness - as you sit down cross-legged, facing each other. For a few minutes, you enjoy the view in silence until Charles interrupts.

"My father showed me this spot when I was little." He plucks a few tufts of grass from the ground. "He liked to come down here when the world down there" - with a nod of his head, he points to beautiful Monaco - "got too stressful for him. Or too noisy. Or just too much." He smiles faintly. "With three young sons who liked to mess with each other, I can't blame him."

You watch as he grinds a few blades of grass between his index finger and thumb until they trickle down in small pieces. "Then he's lucky you're all grown up now."

Charles lips pucker into a thin line and he lets the remaining grass fall to the ground. He folds his hands in his lap and looks toward Monaco. Even though he has his sunglasses on, you can see he closes his eyes. He takes a deep breath. "My father died when I was nineteen."

You don't know how to respond. You're glad Charles keeps talking. "Aside from my mother, he was the best and kindest person I know. He saw something good in everyone, even if they didn't deserve it. He..." Charles swallows the lump in his throat. "He always pushed me to be better, but always brought me back down to earth when I took off. He was never disappointed in me, ever."

You have to smile. "Sounds like a wonderful man."

Charles nods. "He was." He looks back down at his hands. "I miss him every day."

It's strange to hear someone talk about their parents like that when your own are the complete opposite. You can't remember your parents ever being proud of you. Their disappointment and criticism were your constant companions, which is why you couldn't wait to finally move out. And you haven't looked back since.

"I like to come here when I'm stuck. When I'm stuck in a situation where I wish I could ask him for advice. Or I'm feeling lonely." A faint smile returned to his face. "I may not get an answer here, but somehow - I don't know - I don't feel quite so alone anymore when I'm here."

You don't know what to say to him. You've known each other for less than twenty-four hours, were at each other's throats yesterday, and yet he's confided something so intangibly private to you, while you've been nothing but skeptical of him. Charles has revealed himself to you, laid bare some of his cards, made himself vulnerable. And he did so without much hesitation.

"You don't have to tell me who called you. Or whatever that person screwed up. But if you need to talk to someone, I'm here for you." He takes the sunglasses off his nose so he can really look at you, and hangs them on the collar of his sweater. The green of the woods behind you is beautiful, but nothing can compete with the green of his eyes. "That's what friends are for, after all."

You have to smile. "Are we?" You point your index finger at the distance between you. "Friends?"

You feel your question is justified. After all, your "friends" dropped you after ... after everything that happened.

Charles shrugs. "If that's what you want. After all, we live together. Of course, I don't want to force you into it, nor could I. You'd sooner smack me with a rolled-up magazine. I just think it's almost impossible for us not to become friends."

He is right. The apartment is not very big and there is no way you could avoid each other. Especially since you don't have any obligations anymore, no job to go to every day. You'll be hanging out at home all the time and you'll definitely spend all your time next to each other, as long as Charles has nothing to do either.

That you two will become friends is inevitable.

One look at Charles and you'll throw all worries out the window. Charles, who lets you live in his apartment. Charles, who lets you have the bedroom. Charles, who can cook incredibly well. And Charles, who takes you to the most beautiful place, even though it means so much to him.

He looks at you in surprise as you pull the car key out of your jacket pocket and toss it to him. Surprised, he catches it. "I guess I won't need to lock the bedroom door then, will I?"

Charles grins. "I promise not to kill you while you're sleeping." With his index finger, he makes a cross over where his heart beats in his chest. "I might try it when you're awake, though." He winks at you.

Your grin widens. "Luckily, there are still some magazines lying around at home that I can use to defend myself. Just please don't do it when I'm only wearing a towel. That would be an unfair fight."

Charles laughs. He laughs even though he has just expressed one of his deepest feelings and this place reminds him of someone he loved and lost. Even though he's poured his heart out to you. And yet he's sitting there, cross-legged, in front of you, and he's got his head thrown back and he's laughing so loud you're afraid he can be heard all the way to Monte-Carlo.

And good heavens - it's the most beautiful sound you've heard in a long time.

For a moment longer, you enjoy the moment. Despite the call and Charles past, a lightness has spread through you that you haven't felt in ages. The worries have not fallen off your shoulders, but they are no longer so heavy and you would like to thank Charles for that. But as soon as you can open your mouth, he's on his feet in front of you again, looking down at you.

"I didn't promise you too much, did I?" Confused, you look at him. "I mean, about the view."

You shake your head and stand up as well. Side by side, you gaze down at Monaco. "It's the perfect postcard view."

Charles watches you while you take some photos with your camera. You try to take a good picture from every angle, from every position, and as far as you can tell from the small display, some of the shots don't turn out too badly. When you turn around, Charles is standing right behind you.

"If you need another model," he puts his hands on his hips, "I'll volunteer."

You laugh. "Absolutely not. Or I'll get a crack in the lens."

He pushes his bottom lip forward and pouts. "Okay, wow. I'm going to take that personally. Then don't." He's about to turn away from you when you manage to grab the sleeve of his sweater. He glances briefly at where your fingers are gripping the fabric, and unsure, you let go.

"All right. One photo." You raise your camera. Charles tries to get a decent stance, puts his hands in his pockets, then decides against it, crosses his arms in front of his chest, drops them again, runs his hands through his hair. "You'll have to stand in style for me to take a decent picture."

A slight blush creeps onto his cheeks. "What exactly do you want me to do? What would you like?"

You smile at him. "Relax. This isn't a professional shoot, after all." You lower the camera again. "You said you have two brothers. What's the funniest thing you've been through together?"

Charles thinks for a moment and starts to grin. As he tells you about a Christmas when Arthur had been in charge of dessert but unfortunately switched sugar for salt, making the food inedible, you snap a photo of him. His smile is wide, a dimple adorns his cheek, and the wind ruffles his hair. You don't need to snap another. This picture is perfect.

" ... And then we went to McDonalds in the middle of the night to get ice cream," he finishes his story. He looks up. "Did you take a picture? I didn't even notice!" He stands close to you so he can see the camera's display. His perfume hits your nose. "Oh my God." He takes a step away from you, his grin wide. "I've never looked so good. Can you send this to me?"

The walk to the car takes longer than the walk there, in no small part because you don't really want to leave. You memorize every single step so you can find Monaco's most beautiful view again.

"Thank you for bringing me here."

He looks up from his feet and over at you. "I've never brought anyone here before." He smiles gently. "But somehow I felt like you needed this. To be away from it all for once."

"I appreciate that very much. I promise I won't tell anyone about this." You draw a cross with your index finger where your heart beats. Just like he just did. You know how much this place means to him. Never in your life would you bring anyone else here.

Your car comes into your field of vision. In a moment you would drive back home and everything you successfully repressed until just now would be waiting for you there. But it still can't spoil your mood. Not after the beautiful morning.

You hear Charles inhale to say something when suddenly his phone rings. Annoyed, he pulls it out of his pocket and looks at the screen before tossing you the car keys. You almost drop them on the floor. "I need to make a quick call." His voice tone is cold, definitely not as warm and mellow as it was just a few minutes ago. "Go ahead and get in the car. I'll be right behind you."

You nod to him and walk the few feet. You catch the beginning of the conversation anyway.

"Nous en avons déjà parlé. Je t'ai dit que je ne rentrerais pas chez moi pour le moment. Non, écoute, je n'ai ni le temps ni les nerfs pour en parler avec toi. Je suis en déplacement en ce moment. Cela ne te concerne pas". coming home – discuss – not your business

You unlock the car and plant yourself in the passenger seat, which, unlike a moment ago, no longer feels too wrong. While you can no longer understand what Charles is saying, judging by his facial expressions and gestures, it's definitely not a pleasant conversation. His face is flushed and he runs his hand through his hair several times before rolling his eyes.

When his gaze catches yours, you feel caught. As if you're watching him do something private that's none of your business. And for a moment you think that Charles is annoyed, telling you to do something other than watch him. But he just tilts his head and smiles softly before raising a finger in the air with his free hand. His mouth moves and it looks like "One minute" and some French word you can't make out by lip-reading.

You also answer him with a smile and look at the photo on the camera again. It's a little blurry and definitely not your best work, but it was taken from a beautiful moment and is one of your favorite pictures for that alone.

"Sorry." You barely notice Charles sitting down next to you in the car.

You drop the key into his open hand and look at him with concern. "Are you okay?"

He breathes in and out before putting the key in the ignition and letting the engine rev. He doesn't give you an answer to your question, but starts a new topic. "We're going to see Joris. I'd love to know how he got the idea to rent out the apartment without discussing it first." He doesn't smile, but his voice is no longer so callous. You just nod.

The situation is tense, and there's nothing you can do to defuse it except sit quietly and let Charles feel his feelings without judging him. You'd like to reach for his hand and squeeze it so he knows he's not alone. But you don't dare. The look on his face when you just touched his sweater-not even Charles per se-and the thought that you might be crossing a line burns into your brain.

You interlace your fingers in your lap and look out the window.

Of course, you don't notice that Charles' gaze briefly falls on your hands and that he wishes he could take yours in his for a little comfort.

next part

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc smut #charles leclerc blurb #charles leclerc prompt #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc x female reader #Charles Leclerc one shot #Charles Leclerc angst #Charles Leclerc fanfiction #charles leclerc x reader #Carlos Sainz jr

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eetherealgoddess · 3 months

Text

Before you continue, this ends dark as hell so I’m gonna warn you rn!!! Hope you like it anyway! ♡︎♡︎

ꨄEscaping Bonten is for Scrapsꨄ

Oneshot - Yandere Bonten/Assassin Au

❦You are an assassin that’s after a target Bonten already has their paws on❦

Sano Manjiro, Hanemiya Kazutora, Sanzu Haruchiyo, & Haitani Brothers x Reader

Not fully proofread

MY TR FANDOM WORKS ARE ONLY ON TUMBLR, AO3, AND WATTPAD UNDER EETHEREALGODDESS! REPORT IF YOU SEE IT POSTED UNDER ANYONE ELSE BUT ME!!!

I apologize if I get any Japanese etiquette or culture wrong, I literally have to research the culture for some of my fandom stories so if anything is wrong, please excuse my ignorance.

Notice:

✩Y/n is 18+. I picture her as a black female but you can see her however.

✩Some parts of the story may not be realistic or factual. After all, this is a work of fiction.

✩Although it's a dark 'romance,' I do not condone any of the behavior displayed.

✩Dark content such as: gore, violence, triggering topics, graphic scenes, vulgar language, explicit sexual content, etc.

✩There may be scenes that involve non con and/ or dubcon so don’t read if that makes you uncomfortable

✩That being said, this story is for 18+ only.

Enjoy!

Escaping Bonten is for Scraps

You eye around the busy nightclub, pushing through the crowd as you search for your assigned target. Eyebrows furrowed as your nose scrunches at the thick tobacco smell mixed with alcohol and a variety of cologne and perfume.

“Where is this guy?” You hiss, shoving a drunk person to the side as you head to the back of the building. Once you push the doors open, you see the tall staircase, sighing before stepping on.

Why did I have to get assigned to a club?

It’s not that you were against the party scene, it’s just not ideal for a mission to find someone you need to kill. Your boss chose you for the assignment created by a bitter divorcee. You roll your eyes as you remember the file stating, “Please murder my cheating ex husband.” Of course, your company is underground and perfect for not being caught, though why risk going to prison over a cheating spouse?

Fortunately, this should be fairly quick. The soon to be deceased spouse is known for his drinking habit, speaking belligerently as he drunkenly walks from bar to bar which makes him an easy target. You followed him here, his third club of the night. You couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for him considering he is just minding his business and drinking on his lonesome. Sure, he’s bitter as well and is a slob but it’s probably just a down point in his life.

At least I’ll put him out of his misery.

Once you reach the top of the staircase, noticing that the whole floor is empty, you pull your gun out, readying it to use. You hold it down to your side as you walk from room to room, searching for your victim. When you see that the whole upper stairs is empty, you hide your gun, and walk towards the exit of the room you just entered. Your eyes widened when you heard a scream coming from behind you.

You turn around and quickly move to the window, squatting, hiding yourself behind the wall so the people outside couldn’t see you. Easing your head up, you peeked to the outside. Standing at the back of the building, a group of men in suits hover around a kneeling man who’s covering his head as one of the men slams his foot against his side, causing him to fall over. You notice a smaller man who stood in the middle of the suited men walk closer to the male on the ground.

Your eyebrows raise when the man is forced to put his arms down as the shorter man crouches in front of him, realizing the guy is your target.

“What did this guy get himself into?” You whisper to yourself before moving quickly to crack the window so you can decipher what’s occurring.

“You owe us a lot of money, Nakamura.” A man with two blonde strands says, his wide eyes staring deeply at the victim.

“I-I know! I’m going th-through a divorce. I j-just need more time!” He coughs out blood in between his words. The short man in front of him leans in.

“You’ve wasted my time.” He stands up before moving back, motioning for the purple haired man holding the baton to walk forward.

He swings his arms back before slamming them down with a smirk on his face. He repeatedly hits the man over and over again with so much force that blood splatters on his own suit. The man cries out in pain as he becomes light headed.

You wince as you watch this painful sight.

Damn, now I’m feeling even more bad for this guy. I think I’m just going to go ahead and shoot him. Help him out, forreal.

Standing up completely, you aim at the man’s head perfectly with the gun. Without needing the other guy to stop beating him, you pull the trigger, a shot ringing out loudly. The bullet penetrates his head, killing him on the spot. The men, startled, looked around their surroundings as the pink haired man turned to the window, his blue eyes catching yours before you turned on your heel and ran.

“Fuck, he saw me!” You hiss as you run down the stairs, gun hidden as you push through the crowd.

Fortunately, it looks as though you all are into some shady business, though that doesn’t mean you want to catch their attention. You run out of the exit and rush to your car parked at the side of the building.

“Shit, shit, shit!” You rush to unlock the car before hopping in. Before you could close the door, a hand blocks the door. Your wide eyes meet purple orbs before you're pulled out of the car by your shirt. Before you could grab your gun, your front is forced against the car as your gun is grabbed and aimed at your head. The man with the purple mullet holds your arms behind your back with one hand. Before you could say anything, the butt of the gun meets your head, darkness engulfing your vision.

When you first wake up, your eyes meet a dimly lit warehouse, a throbbing pain at the side of your head causes you to pull against the restraints you didn’t know were there to touch your head. Groaning your eyes, the rope strategically tied around your ankles strapping you to the chair.

“Damn.” You breathe out. The click of a gun sounded next to your head causing you to make eye contact with the blue-eyed man you saw before.

“You’re an assassin working for an underground company, right Y/n?” You look up to see the short man sitting on a chair in front of you at a distance. The men stood around him, eyeing you.

“Who am I answering to?” You question, resulting in the gun being pushed against your head harder causing you to wince, the spot where you were once hit feeling raw under the barrel of the weapon.

“I don’t repeat myself.” The sunken eyed man states, his white hair hovering over his face.

“Yes.” You spit out, frustration being the only emotion to decipher at the moment.

“You work for Bonten.” You gasp at the familiar name.

“What the hell are you talking about?” The gun smacks against your face, forcing your head to lean to the side as you squeeze your eyes shut in pain.

“Watch your mouth.” The pink haired man growls, using one hand to force your head back in place before replacing the barrel in the same spot.

“You will keep your assassin title and you will work under the executives.” Your eyebrows furrowed.

“Or what?” You hiss. The pale man signals for the taller short haired man to walk towards you holding his baton. He smiles before pulling it back and slamming it against your stomach. You lean forward before coughing out blood.

“You die.” Your new boss states.

A few months pass before you’re completely used to the yakuza scene. There are times when you wonder what exactly did they see in you to ‘hire’ you as an assassin working under the executives. It wasn’t a hard job, basically like the one you were used to besides the power dynamic. Although you worked under an old boss, he treated everyone equally and you had normal coworkers who you’d go out to the bars with occasionally. You were free to live your own life as long as you didn’t get caught.

Working under Bonten, you weren’t allowed the same freedom as your executives. Your job title was assassin but considering their low respect for you, sometimes you were a maid, assistant, butler, etc. At least that’s what it felt like when you had to run errands for them that didn’t involve shooting a bullet in someone’s head. Sure it’s nicer than killing but who wants to work to serve a bunch of disrespectful men?

Not to mention, you weren’t allowed outside without being accompanied by one of the executives. Of course, the executives you wouldn’t mind being around such as Mochi, Kakucho, Koko, and Takeomi weren’t the ones who accompanied you. It was always the Haitani brothers, Kazutora, or Sanzu. Even when you’re supposed to be off the clock you were always around at least one of them. You no longer have your own apartment and have to stay in a designated room in a penthouse that holds all of your rooms, though everyone else owns their own homes.

Currently, you are sitting in the vip section of one of the Haitani brother’s clubs, arms crossed along with your leg as you lean back on the couch. Kazutora plops next to you with a drink in hand along with one of the strippers in the other, her bare breasts out as she holds onto him.

“You don’t look so happy, Y/n. Should we have taken you to a male strip club?” He taunts, finding amusement in her pouty face.

“I’m glad you find humor in my suffering. I just want to go to bed.” You respond.

A dip on your other side causes you to turn your head to meet Sanzu who has a speck of white dust under his nose. He wipes using his sleeve before handing you a cup of alcohol.

“Live a little, yeah?” You raise a brow as you push the drink away. You had to admit how interesting it was to see the different contrasts between the infamous mad dog. One minute he’s all serious for ‘his king’ and the next he’s sniffing angel’s dust off of a stripper's ass. Interesting indeed.

“I don’t know what you put in that.” You state before turning away from him.

“Then take this. It’s just champagne.” Rin smirks as he hands you another glass from a separate chair, man spreading as he smokes a blunt.

“And I should trust you, why?” You roll your eyes before standing up.

“Where are you off to?” Ran asks as his hand grips the butt cheek of the stripper sucking his neck.

“Bathroom.” You state before walking out. You eye the guards before heading to the restroom.

You walk to the sink and lean over, staring at yourself in the mirror as you think your life over and what brought you to this point. You swiftly turn your head when someone walks into the bathroom. You notice the woman is wearing a poorly done wig with a coat on. You contemplate whether or not you should knock her out and disguise yourself so you can make a run for it.

My morals have always been skewed anyway. I’m sorry lady.

Before she could walk into the stall, you grab her and press her pressure point, catching her before she falls. You undo her coat and set the purse on the ground, lying her head on it gently before pulling her wig off. Setting the wig on as well as the coat, you walk out of the bathroom.

You walk at a steady pace to look anything but suspicious while keeping your head down. When you successfully pass the guards you make a run for it, rushing out of the club and finding a taxi to pick you up, throwing your phone out of the window for safety from a tracking device.

Your adrenaline pumps as the hairs on your body stand. You breathe heavily as you give the taxi man the direction to your old company’s headquarters. When you got there, you ran into the building in search of your boss. When you find his office, you push the doors open and run towards the man who looks at you with shock.

A year passes and he helps you back on your feet. Staying as an assassin would have been dangerous considering the first place Bonten searched for you was the headquarters. Fortunately, he has a family who owns different businesses so you currently work at a bakery on the farthest side of a city hours away from where you used to reside.

One night, you were cleaning up the floors, closing the store. You had already locked the door so you were confused when you heard someone entering the building. Looking up, you dropped the broom when you recognized Mikey standing in front of the door with a gun pointed at you. Before you could move, a hand wrapped around your mouth as someone grabbed your arms, pulling you against a chest. You struggle in their hold.

Your eyes widen when you see your boss and his family consisting of his wife, two of their adult children, and one child being dragged in wrapped in rope and bags over their heads. You scream against the hand.

“Relax and everything will go smoother.” The voice she recognized as Kazutora states behind her.

Once the other men force everyone on their knees in front of her, they pull the bags off their heads.

She screams once more when she makes eye contact with all of them, tears running down her face for the first time at the face of death.

No they can’t do this! This can’t be happening!

Complying to Mikey’s order, Kazutora removes his hand from her mouth as he locks arms with hers. She pulls against him as she tries to release herself, to no avail. The Haitani brothers watch in amusement as they stand behind the two adult kids. Sanzu stands behind the child as Mikey moves to stand behind the boss.

“This is your fault.” He says to you, glaring before he sets his gun to the man’s head. The child cries along with the mother and the children. The man’s eyes are wide as he looks to the side in the direction of his family. They were prevented from talking, mouths bound shut as they squeal and groan.

“Mikey! M-Mikey please don’t do this! I-I’ll stay this time I swear to god! Please… just kill me or something d-don’t take it out on them!” You cry out, devastated by the display as the guilt takes over.

“Sanzu.” He states. Everyone watches as he sets the barrel of the gun on the child’s head, pulling the trigger before anyone could think. There was a pause as the shot rang out, the blood and brains splattering against his siblings, the wall, and the floor.

“STOP! NO MORE!” You let out a blood curdling scream. You pull and pull against Kazutora as he grips you tighter.

Your boss wails against his restraints angrily, falling over when he attempts to stand up, lying pitifully on his side as he kicks his feet and pulls against the rope. The wife and their children cry out, tears dropping fast as they squeeze their eyes shut.

“Haitanis.”

“NO! NO MIKE-!” The shots rang out, more blood and brains splattering as their limp bodies fall to the ground, one sibling with half of their head gone as well as the other along with an eyeball, their blood reaching their mother as she completely bends over and cries.

Mikey aims at the wife shooting her twice before her limp body falls, the husband still as he weeps for his deceased family. Kazutora allows you to drop to your knees. Hands placed on the ground as you become light headed. Finally, vomit shoots up your throat as you release the contents on the ground. Gagging and belching as your body shakes, wet with sweat.

This must be my karma for all of the wrong doings. This must be how people feel when they see their loved ones die.

“I-I’m so sorry, Akihiko. I’m so fucking sorry.” You whine out, tears and snot falling as you become a wreck. He looks at you with despair.

“Please, escape the-!” Before he could finish his sentence, Mikey had already blown his brains out.

You gaze at the messy floor with a blurry vision and wide eyes. Footsteps stop in front of you, missing the vomit. Mikey crouches down and pulls you by the chin to look up at him, gun still in the other hand.

“If you try to leave again, I’ll blow your legs off.”

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mochalate · 4 months

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"ghosts" ; postwar!levi/reader w/c: 700 ; fluff/angst

unlike levi, you're physically whole, but you seem to have lost some pieces of yourself too

“Do you want milk in your tea?” you ask, firing up the stove.

Levi pretends there isn’t a lump in his throat. “No.”

He remembers you asking him this question before, in another life. One where the monsters didn’t only show up at night; where you knew what they looked like without him having to tell you.

Where you remember he hates milk in his tea.

Levi fears he's being greedy, wishing for you to remember. He’s been doing nothing but wishing for the last few months— how long until the universe takes away everything it’s given him this time, like he’s a spoiled child having his playthings confiscated after a tantrum?

He tries to be grateful. You survived that fall from the Founding Titan’s spines. Someone, somewhere had listened when he’d held your hand and prayed for you to wake up, to look at him just one more time, so he could apologise for not being there to catch you. He’d wanted nothing more than to hear you say his name again. So what if you'd ended up saying it like a question?

Levi watches you set his cup down in front of him, smiling. You’re always smiling now, far more than before. It makes him worry he’s being selfish, wanting you to get better. Wouldn’t he choose to forget too? All of the death and the destruction, from the underground to the coast of Marley; and the powerlessness to stop any of it?

He tries to tell himself he would, but he knows it’s a lie. What else did he have to show for all of it, if not for those memories?

“Have you remembered anything?” he asks.

You shake your head. “I’m sorry, Levi.”

“Don’t apologise. You aren’t doing anything wrong.”

You bite your lip— just like you always did. That’s what gives him this devastating, soul-gouging hope, every day. How you’re still you. You still like sweet things more than salty ones, and your spoon still produces the same clinking melody when you stir the sugar into your tea.

He allows the wound to reopen itself every morning after you ask to start sleeping next to him again, because he wakes up with your head tucked against his shoulder just like he remembers. He knows everything is still in there, buried somewhere inside your body; because on some nights, you cry and struggle in your sleep, running from things that won’t ever chase you anymore.

Levi selfishly wakes you up, to ask you again and again if you remember, but you never do.

Pieck had visited once, back from one of their peace-mongering trips. They weren’t working, she’d told him. She’d heard all about him from his brats in the 104th, and thought he would have some sage wisdom; or at least understand what it felt like to lose hope in something you believed in.

He couldn’t supply either of those things.

Pieck was smart, he’ll give her that. She had understood immediately.

“I always felt,” she’d said, “that it was the worst thing in the world to not have any scars to show. But at least I could explain what was wrong with me.”

“There’s nothing wrong with her,” Levi had replied. It was true.

Pieck had hummed. “There’s definitely something wrong with you though, captain. Who thinks waking their wife up from a nightmare is selfish?”

It's selfish, because Levi feels like what he wakes you up into must be the real nightmare, lying next to a strange man who knows more about you than anyone else in the world.

"What's got you worried?" you ask him, shaking him out of his thoughts.

He's worried you'll realise he could just be a bad dream, if that's what you wanted. "I'm not worried."

"You're quiet."

"I'm always quiet."

You laugh. He realises your cup is already half-empty, and his is untouched.

"You're quiet, but not like this. Penny for your thoughts?"

You give him a smile that's as lovely as always, as lovely as it's always been. He knows he could fall in love with that smile as many times as it took. And when you reach for his hand, he wants to believe you'll allow him to, even if it's just for today.

Thank you for reading! Please like/reblog if you enjoyed. :) check out my other stuff?

Divider @/cafekitsune

#snk x reader #aot x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #levi oneshot #angst #fluff #i swear im working on precipice i have 3k words in the draft #my fic

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moanz111 · 10 months

Text

final round - choi san

🥊 pairing: boxer/fighter!choi san x boxing coach!gn!reader

🥊 genre: angst, fluff, strangers to lovers, dystopian au

🥊 summary: surviving in a city of outlaws has never been easy, with your days filled with emptiness and fear, and your only comfort being the weekly boxing matches in an underground club. but when you accidentally meet san, promising you a new beginning, your whole world is about to turn upside down.

🥊 featuring: biker!hwa; biker!yeosang; boxing coach/manager!wooyoung; cowboy(????)!mingi; oc!jay

🥊 wc: 5.9 k

🥊 warnings/tags: english is not my native language so there can be mistakes; descriptions of fighting/injuries/bleeding; setting is inspired by ateez's lore and the outlaw album (it's not accurate, just took some details from it, terminology can be inaccurate); use of pet names (angel); reader has an older brother; jay (reader's friend) doesn't represent any real person; there can be inaccuracies about boxing (i tried my best); mentions of guns/shooting (no one is harmed!!); repressive government; mentions of loss of family members/friends; reader is a bartender too; descriptions of kissing; lmk if i've missed something

credits for all the used graphics belong to their rightful owners!

🥊 note: happy (late) birthday to one of my favourite artists and people, sannie!

after all, i decided to post this fic even though i'm on a break lmao i feel a little bit more comfortable with posting it now and am doing better! and also i just couldn't wait to share this with you so...

i had so much fun writing this and got so inspired by ateez's album that i just had to do something about it. i'm trying a different genre this time so i hope you enjoy reading it!!

also, i'm super awkward when writing kissing scenes, help.

any form of feedback is greatly appreciated so don't be shy to reblog with your thoughts, comment or send me an ask! it really means a lot to me and keeps me motivated!

Sweat dripped down your forehead, tickling your chin and neck as you gripped tightly the ring ropes, lunging your body forward with excitement. Even though you’d never admit it out loud, the adrenaline running through your veins during the intense boxing matches you attended every weekend made you feel more alive than ever. The way the two boxers threw fierce punches at each other was not exactly abiding by the game’s rules but no one around you seemed to care or even notice.

Living in a world where tomorrow might never come, these were the only moments you could be your most authentic self without the mask of acquiescence on. This world was sick, filled with horrors and demons, haunting you even in your dreams and watching your every step. However, this world was beautiful too, filled with secretly exchanged hopeful glances and little reasons to look up at the grey sky, praying better days would come.

What you were doing right now - smiling, screaming, the sole act of feeling was illegal but the thrill that filled your body was something you were willing to risk your life for. You had made your decision a long time ago - the rules didn’t matter to you anymore.

“A win for Black Serpent,” you heard the referee shout in an attempt to fight the hundreds of voices, drowning his own as the champion threw his red boxing gloves at the public. Blue and purple marks painted his features and his almost closed left eye was swollen but the triumphant grin plastered on his face told you, as usual, his injuries were not one of his problems.

Such a show-off, you thought when your friend waved at you from the ring, flexing his biceps proudly. It wasn’t surprising to you that he won tonight’s match. During the few years you’d known Jay, you’d never seen him lose. Having been a professional competitor in the past, as he had told you when you first met, the underground club’s matches were his way to escape the harsh reality and remember the good old times.

Plus, you’d seen the bags full of cash from bets after a successful night. After all, that was why you had become his “accomplice” or as he liked referring to you - his devil accountant. The job was simple enough and you didn’t mind the extra income - working as a bartender at the local bar came with its perks but with the money you made you could never possibly afford a place of your own, neither did it give you the comfort you could run away one day from this awful blackhole. So you gladly kept track of the bets for Jay’s matches and sometimes you even helped him train as you knew a thing or two about boxing yourself.

Tonight was no different. As you pushed your way through the crowd, collecting the bills, you saw a lot of familiar faces who greeted you warmly. At least some of them. Others - weren’t so friendly, swearing and even refusing to give you the money, overcome by anger after losing, but they knew better than to test you. No one wanted Jay’s wrath upon them.

“I think you forgot about me, angel,” you heard a raspy voice behind you just as you were about to call it a day and go to the locker room where Jay was waiting for you. Turning around, you were, to say the least confused. The man before you wore a grey hoodie over his head, hiding his features, and matching sweatpants, looking nothing like the usual visitors of the fight club. He was tall but muscular - you could see it even though his baggy clothes left much to the imagination. His broad shoulders and confident stance told you he was much more than he led you to believe. Was he another competitor?

Looking down at his stretched-out hand, you saw a few bills folded in his palm. A cat-like smirk formed on your lips. “Though night for you, huh?” “I don’t like voting in favour of my biggest competition,” the man laughed as you took the money, writing down the amount in your notebook. Jay was going to be pleased with tonight’s profit which meant another celebration for him and another babysitting gig for you.

However, the stranger’s words made you wonder what exactly his intention was. If he was telling the truth, then why bother betting if Jay was his next match? With his face engulfed in shadows and mystery, his aura alone sent shivers down your spine, alarming you for danger. Taking a step away from the man, you folded your arms before your chest. “What is your deal?”

He tilted his head to one side, regarding you quietly like a predator about to chase his next prey. Closing the distance between you in a matter of seconds, he leaned down to your right ear, whispering softly, his breath hot against your neck, “You’ll find out soon, angel.”

Still in a daze after your encounter with the stranger, you watched him pull away from you, shooting you one last mischievous smirk before diving into the crowd. Shaking your head, you let out a deep sigh.

Trouble always found its way to you.

The deafening sound of the morning alarm, signaling it was time for everyone to go to work, rang in your ears as you walked to the bar where you worked during the day. The sun was still hiding under the horizon and the sky was painted in a mix of deep blue, purple, and orange. The streets were empty without a single soul in sight except you and the black stray cat that accompanied you every day on your way. It brought you a sense of comfort - to have a small friend by your side in these lonely times of the day.

Forming genuine connections with other human beings was almost impossible. There were many stories about heartless betrayals, travelling from person to person in this city of outlaws. Today’s friend could easily turn into tomorrow's enemy. However, right now this place was your everything and all you could do is learn how to survive. You’d heard of other faraway cities where people had it way worse than you did and were much more repressed by the titanic power of the Guardians. Sometimes you were even grateful you were surrounded by outcasts and criminals rather than a white sea of masks, pointing guns at your face.

Here, the inhabitants had found their ways of rebelling right under the government's nose without being noticed and the bar you were currently opening was one of their favourite places to do it. You'd witnessed hundreds of pieces of intel being exchanged for contraband and hundreds of unfulfilled plans for the future dying under the dim yellow lights. Still, no one gave up. That was the only rule everyone followed wholeheartedly - better surrender and lose your life than give up your dreams and hopes and become a dead man walking.

Pushing your thoughts away, you braced yourself for yet another day during which you had to take on the role of the oblivious bartender. Your job was to keep your mouth shut and eyes closed so when you saw one of your regulars enter the building, looking suspiciously around, you almost laughed.

“Good morning, Mingi,” you greeted him leaning on the broom you were swiping the floor with to take a proper look at him. His cowboy boots and hat, the usual, now shabby, long brown coat and the chains dangling at his neck as he walked slowly towards you gave away that he was meeting someone important today. The tall and lean man oozed confidence and threat just by standing and you were glad you were on his good side.

You'd met Mingi on your very first day as a bartender and quickly developed a soft spot for him. You weren't aware of exactly what he was doing except sitting around with you and being a menace to your boss but there were dozens of wanted posters around the city, including on the wall behind the countertop you mixed beverages on. The portrait drawing sure did him justice and you'd always been perplexed as to how the Guardians hadn't caught him yet.

In your eyes Mingi was good-natured and considerate, always asking about your day and throwing a joke or two to make you smile but you'd seen his nasty side too. That was why when he pulled out his pistol from his holster belt and placed it on top of the bar as he sat down on his usual spot, you felt shivers run down your spine.

“Don't worry, Y/N,” said Mingi, turning to look at you with a reassuring smile. If you got paid every time you heard him say this before destroying everything and everyone on his way, you would've been a millionaire. Sighing heavily, you walked over to him to stand behind the bar and took his pistol in your hands. Earning a surprised squeal from the man, you shook your head.

“You're the reason I'm not getting paid, cowboy. The amount of repairs we’ve made in a month is insane.”

“I'm sorry,” Mingi answered with a pout. Your boss wasn't going to be happy he came here again. You could only imagine the old man's smile as he put up these wanted posters. Hell, if he could turn in Mingi himself, he would be on cloud nine. “But be careful and don't shoot anyone.”

“You worry about yourself,” you sighed and pointed behind him. A young man was entering the bar, humming an unknown-to-you melody and carrying a bag over his shoulder. Sunglasses hid his eyes and a grin showed off his dimples.

“You didn't tell me your friend was such a beauty, Mingi,” the man whistled, eyeing you from head to toe after he removed his glasses, placing them on top of his head. You felt heat burn up your cheeks and you found it hard to hold his intense stare. Now being able to properly look at his face, some sort of recognition passed through your mind but you couldn't wrap your head around where you'd seen him before.

As the newcomer sat down next to Mingi, you couldn't stifle your laugh this time. They reminded you of a comedic duo from the comic books you used to read as a child, now long gone and turned into ashes, with the newcomer dressed casually in a black and white shirt, the fabric flowing around his body and a few buttons undone, showing his collarbones, and Mingi in his “official” attire with a serious look on his face and furrowed brows.

“Don't even think of laying a finger on Y/N, Wooyoung,” warned Mingi as your friend took out a white envelope from his coat’s pockets, handing it to the other man. A silent look, holding thousands of words, was exchanged by them before Wooyoung swiftly hid it under his shirt. “We can talk comfortably here. They won't say anything.”

“My lips are sealed,” you made a motion as if you locked them with a key and threw it in Wooyoung’s direction, earning a loud laugh from him.

“I like them. We should recruit them.”

“Absolutely no,” Mingi sternly refused, scolding both of you with a glance. “Let's talk business now.”

Mindlessly washing the shot glasses and polishing them, you listened to the two men’s conversation, pretending none of what they said was surely granting them a death sentence. The images they described with pretty words and empty promises filled your heart with longing for a distant land where everything you'd ever dreamt of was real.

Where there existed other sounds - other than your heartbeat and the screeching alarm.

Where you could look up at the sky and see the stars - not the brown clouds of dust and pain.

Where emotions like sorrow and fear were replaced by joy and comfort.

So you listened and listened until you'd memorised every single sentence, hoping to dream of this new world tonight.

“The others will call for us soon. We just need to wait for a sign,” said Wooyoung, getting up from his seat and stretching his limbs. “San has a match tomorrow so if- no…when he wins, we'll have enough money for the next mission.”

A match?

A lightbulb lit up at the back of your mind as your memories took you to last night’s events. The stranger's words made much more sense than before and you were pretty sure you'd seen Wooyoung, lurking in the shadows and grinning after Jay’s final victorious blow. Keeping this information to yourself, you remained silent even when Wooyoung gave you a knowing look.

“His opponent is pretty tough and so is his coach…,” he trailed off, playing with his silver earrings, shimmering under the first morning rays.

“Good luck then. I'll see you in a week,” Mingi answered, shaking his accomplice’s hand as he too got up to leave. Glancing at you, he placed a few bills on the counter, way too many than needed. “For the special service today.”

“You don't have to-”

“And a bet for Black Serpent.”

“Jerk,” whined Wooyoung, rolling his eyes and earning another warning look from Mingi to whom you returned the pistol you took earlier. “I look forward to our little dance tomorrow, Y/N.”

Giving you a playful wink, Wooyoung took his bag and trailed after Mingi who was already striding to the exit, talking about manners and social norms which you found amusing.

At least, he didn't vandalise property today.

“The underdog vs. the big champion, huh,” Jay hummed as he traced his finger over his opponent's name on the list, placed at the fight club’s entrance. The match was only a few hours away and unable to sleep from excitement, you'd dragged your friend to the ring to practice some extra time. You didn't know what kind of fighter San was but better be prepared than sorry later. The rumors about him going around in the underground club didn’t give you much information either - some said he was ruthless and vicious, others - just a showoff. One thing was sure though - he had an incredible win rate with his name at the top of the rank list at least once a month.

“Isn't it a bit cocky to call yourself the big champion,” you teased Jay as you pushed him inside the locker room so he could change into his practice clothes. You noticed one other locker was closed and were curious who else would've come here at that time of the day. Only champions and their coaches were allowed in when there wasn't a match.

“I know my worth, Y/N,” Jay sighed while rolling bandages over his wounded knuckles. The bruises from his last match were still visible on his body and you wondered if they ever healed. You also mentally noted he had cut his hair down to a buzzcut again. He was serious about tonight then. Not that you expected anything different. San was the only person who could challenge him for his title. “I'm not a loser.”

“Sure, now get up. We have a lot of work to do.”

“Jay, cover-up,” you shouted while monitoring your friend’s warm-up match, feeling your nerves slowly getting to you. You weren't exactly surprised when you found out the other fighter in the club and Jay’s opponent was the stranger you’d met the other night and of course, Wooyoung was his cornerman and manager.

San’s presence turned coaching Jay into a challenge, unlike any other time. His movements were practiced and calculated, his punches swift and precise. The white tank top he was wearing revealed his toned body and well-defined muscles and made you stare more than to your liking. His sharp features and handsome face mixed with his professionalism were a weapon San used well on the ring since you could see Jay was intimidated probably for the first time. Wooyoung’s annoyingly proud smile didn't help either.

Blood was dripping down San’s chin from a cut, gifted to him by Jay after one of his blows, and sweat formed on his forehead as he counterattacked, delivering a strong punch on your friend's face. Their match resembled a passionate and intimate dance that you weren't supposed to witness. Their pride and skills were on the line.

“Parry, Jay,” you once again yelled and seconds later the final bell rang, putting an end to their spar before your friend could react, taking a painful hook from San. Getting up from your chair, you went up to the ring and handed Jay a water bottle which he splashed on his face with a groan. You praised yourself for taking your first aid kit before leaving your apartment. If he was so beaten up right now, you didn't want to imagine what both of them were going to look like by the end of the night.

“You sure know a lot about boxing, Y/N,” San said, breathing heavily as he took his gloves off, throwing them at Wooyoung. It was the first time he addressed you directly today and you were taken by surprise when he jumped off the ring, coming closer to you. His face was glistening and his brown eyes were burning with passion you'd never seen before. Sure, Jay enjoyed fighting but you knew it wasn't the same as it used to be for him. San, however, had the eagerness to learn and win as a newbie even though his skills made you believe he was as good as a coach. Maybe even better than most. “Where did you learn?”

“Let's say I'm very observant,” you answered quietly, trying to avert his attention away from you and the topic. Still, the sting in your heart, forming as memories flooded your mind reminded you of the past you were so willing to escape from. You could still smell the distinctive scent of your brother’s gloves. The thrill that came with each victory. The pain that filled your being after leaving your past life behind without looking back. What had even happened with your family and friends? Were they alive? Were they safe?

“I'd call this more than just “being observant”,” Wooyoung joined the conversation, pulling you out of your thoughts. He put his arm around your shoulders, squeezing them tightly and you whined. “We hit the jackpot, San.”

“What do you mean?”

“We have an offer for you, Y/N.”

The next few months after the official match between San and Jay passed in a daze for you. Someone had to pinch you. Hard.

Wooyoung, you’d realised, was a gambling addict. There wasn't any other logical explanation behind his behaviour. Whatever you did or said, he turned into a bet out of which only one of you could emerge as a winner.

So just like that, after that practice match, he and San had made a proposal that was too difficult to decline and simple enough to follow. If San won, you'd coach him for his next matches and join their small group of outlaws. As they told you - they needed someone competent on their side. If Jay won, you'd go on your way and forget about it. Not that this was possible.

You would've lied if you’d said you had been surprised when San delivered the final victorious blow that night. Secretly, you had hoped for this turn of events not much to your friend’s liking. While you were patching up his wounded and bleeding face, whispering comforting words, your betraying heart was accelerating with your mind plagued by thoughts of San.

Today was no different. As you watched San practice his kicks on a punching bag in the fight club, you caught yourself blushing at one of his particularly precise deliveries. Boxing is my thing, I guess, you thought when he halted his movements to drink some water and pulled his tank top over his head, showing off his toned body.

Moments like this were routine for you at this point - just both of you sitting in silence, only his heavy breathing audible - him practicing and you observing. San’s progress was outstanding and this left you jobless - he didn’t need your directions anymore that much. You didn't feel the need to fill the space with small talk or pointless conversations when you were with him and thought of him as someone who had always been part of your life.

Intimidating at first glance, San was, in reality, the kindest person you had ever met. He cared deeply about the people he loved, always making sure to put them first above everything else. He was also thoughtful and considerate - attentive to everyone’s needs and was always there when you needed him the most. San brought you comfort unlike anyone else and you told him things you hadn't even dared before. Your relationship was progressing fast - with a lot of skipped steps, blurring the line between friends and lovers but you didn't mind. Labels weren't needed for you to feel what you did towards him. Not when you had so few opportunities to be together.

You two often daydreamed about this new world he and his friends liked talking about. He wanted to stop fighting - hurting people was what he hated doing the most but their group needed the money desperately. There was no other choice for him but to sacrifice himself every day. San, instead, wanted to build a home for his loved ones and create a safe space for them where they could be together and where he could protect them.

“You can't protect everyone, San”, you had told him the day he shared his plans with you while both of you were sitting on the cold floor of the locker room, shoulder to shoulder. His proximity had your head spinning and you found it hard to focus on his words. San held your hands, tracing circles mindlessly on them, before bringing them to his lips.

“I have to do what I can, though. I can't just give up on any of you,” he had answered, whispering into your skin, goosebumps forming all over your body. Before that, you hadn't considered yourself that important to him and his words made your heart skip a few beats.

“I know what it feels like…,” The lump in your throat and the painful memories of your family had tears forming in your eyes that you tried blinking away. No point in crying when you didn't have the power to change the past. San brought his big hands to your face, cupping your cheeks, forcing you to look at him, and you tried pulling away. The pity and guilt in his eyes were something you wanted to erase forever.

“You can't just run away from your demons, Y/N. Sometimes you have to face them.”

So you had wept in his arms, telling him your life's story for the first time and he had brushed every fear, doubt, and pain away with his soft touches and gentle gaze.

You had grown up in the Outlaw City’s outskirts, in a restricted area where the Guardians’ influence and presence weren't as noticeable. The people were happy - you remembered seeing children playing freely, people reading and drawing and creating with all their might without being disturbed.

Your parents were ordinary people, working ordinary jobs and living an ordinary life. You and your older brother, however, were nothing like them. The fighting rebellious spirit was something you had no idea who passed down to both of you but you were grateful to whoever ancestor was responsible for it.

You two always found ways to get into trouble - from stealing a guitar from one of the contraband gangs in the city to compose silly songs to your brother learning how to box only to enter underground tournaments to earn some extra income for your family. He had learned from the older kids a trick or two and you had made it your life's purpose to follow him around until he taught you too.

You missed those days dearly. The mornings when you would spar together under the blazing sun for hours. The nights when you would go to the restricted area of the city to fight and then run back home with the money you'd made before someone else took it from you. Every day was a game of survival, but you were happy. You had your brother - your only pillar in this dark world.

Until one day everything changed.

That day, the Guardians had come in groups to your city, taking every child or adult in their way, destroying every last piece of safety. You remembered your last moments with your family before they took them away. Your brother screaming at you to run, your father fighting the white-dressed Guardian, and your mother crying in fear. You had tried saving them but to no avail. At least, you didn't know if they had survived and there was no one you could ask. Five years had passed since.

You found your new home in Outlaw City where everyone was a runaway like you and where no one would ask where you'd come from. Your only resolve was to pray that your family was safe and sound and that one day you would find them. This time you were more prepared than ever, you were ready to protect them at the price of anything. So as San wiped away your tears with his thumbs, you felt the heavy burden of your past lift itself from your shoulders.

“I hate myself for leaving them every day, San,” you confess with a shaky voice, trying to calm yourself down.

“The only thing you could do is survive, angel,” he whispered, putting his hands on your shoulders, and squeezing them. Looking at his bruised face, you reminded yourself that everyone here carried their own scars - both visible and invisible, and your heart hurt even more. “It was the same for me. I had to leave my family behind when I came here so I found a new one. Not that it’ll ever stop hurting any less. All eight of us are the same at heart. We all want the same thing.”

A new world to come, you thought and smiled, thinking of Mingi’s passionate speech from the last time you saw him at the bar. He had told you all about their plans and wanted you to be part of them. To join their found family.

Now, returning to reality, you regarded San curiously and a little afraid as he came to stand in front of your chair, leaning down to place a kiss on top of your head. Blushing at the affection in his eyes, you cleared your throat, searching for the right words. A week had passed since this moment and none of you had said anything about it so you couldn't help but feel flustered at his every word and action towards you.

“How was I today, coach?” San chuckled, gently tracing the sides of your face with his fingertips, rough from the endless fighting.

“Could be better,” you gave him your usual response, San grinning and showing his dimples.

“I have to work harder. But maybe if you stared less...”

“And maybe if you paid less attention to me...”

“That's impossible,” San concluded, crouching down, placing his palms on top of your thighs, and you ran your hands through his messy dark locks. With glinting eyes, he excitedly added, “After tonight’s match some of the boys and I will have a meeting. They want you to come.”

“They?”

“I,” the seriousness in his voice made you let out a laugh and your stomach tightened with anticipation. You had only met Mingi and Wooyoung before with the rest of the boys surrounded by a mist of mystery, with only having heard stories about them. The fact that San was letting you get closer to the people he cherished the most didn't help your fluttering heart either.

“Can't wait.”

San had dragged you out of the fight club and drove you to your apartment to freshen up before meeting the boys with his old van that, who knew how, still functioned. As he had told you while focused on the bumpy road ahead, the vehicle had turned into, both a prison and a temporary home for him and Wooyoung while they were on the run from the Guardians. Guilt washed over you when San described all of their sleepless nights, fighting the demons following them right behind even in their dreams while you were hiding between the four walls of the safety of your home. Mingi’s wanted posters, his constant cautiousness, and the silver pistol always attached to his hip made so much more sense now.

Unfortunately, the Guardians had taken notice of them way too early into their secret operations against the government, and now as you were sitting in front of the boys - their features, illuminated by the dim lighting of the storage house you were in, your heart filled with hurt. In the few hours, you got to know Yeosang and Seonghwa, speeding through the highways every night in search of valuable intel and doing all they could to survive another day, your admiration grew with every next moment spent with them.

Sitting on one of your favourite fluffy blankets on the floor in a circle, eating an improvised dinner consisting of cold chicken nuggets provided by Yeosang, you felt more at home than ever. Mingi and Wooyoung’s silly bickering and friendly teasing, Seonghwa’s warm welcome, Yeosang’s kind smile, and San’s calming presence next to you, filled you with joy, and for the first time in a while, you forgot about the outside world.

“It’s a pity the others couldn’t come today,” said Seonghwa with a sigh as he passed on to you the chocolate bar all of you were sharing. You hadn’t seen one in ages, nor tasted it. Yeosang had just shrugged indifferently earlier at your genuine surprise, telling you he could get one inside the city for you anytime you craved it.

So now playing with the piece in your mouth, letting the sweetness tickle your taste buds, you hummed in agreement. The rest of the group had to stay undercover for a little longer before joining you. “They would’ve loved to meet you, Y/N.”

“They will,” San joined, squeezing your hand and rubbing his thumb over it. Turning your head to look at him, you were met with his dark eyes, shimmering with a glow as if hundreds of stars were in them. You slowly found yourself being pulled by the gravity of his gaze, unable to look away.

“Now, can you two not do this,” whined Wooyoung, earning a playful slap on his thigh from Seonghwa, followed by Mingi and Yeosang’s laughs. “I have to put up with you every day at the club. I’m going to start vomiting rainbows soon.”

“Get a life, Woo,” said Mingi, winking at you. Usually, you could fight back and tease Wooyoung but tonight, embarrassment washed over you after his words. “Leave the lovebirds alone.”

Just then, still holding your hand firmly, San pulled you up gently so now both of you were standing. “Then let’s get out of here.”

The distant hooting of owls, coming deep from the woods, the light chilly late-night breeze, carrying the smell of pines, and San’s warm touch against your skin engulfed your senses, making your head spin. With your eyes closed, all you could do was trust the man as he guided you through the darkness around you.

“Can I open my eyes,” you asked once again with your previous attempts to get a positive answer out of him being unsuccessful. His deep chuckle vibrated through your body, his hand letting go of yours. Longing for his touch again, you reached forward for him but only brushed through the air.

“I’ve got you, angel,” San’s raspy voice now came from behind you and you felt him put his hands on your shoulders. “You can open them now.”

The view before your eyes made you tear up and a lump formed in your throat, every word you wanted to utter getting caught up in it. The little fireflies, swinging around in a slow dance around you, their comforting glow, reminding you of those you used to catch in the hot summer nights in front of your childhood house with your brother, the vast field you were standing in the middle of, and the tickling in your legs from the overgrown grass were all images and sensations you thought you’d never see or feel again for the rest of your life.

“How did you find this place,” you whispered, too afraid someone would take this moment away from you.

“It’s my special place. I think the Guardians have forgotten about it,” said softly San, moving to stand in front of you with a warm smile on his face. “Now I can finally share it with someone else.”

“Do you come here often?”

“Yes, whenever I need to clear my head,” he trailed off, laughing. “And some time away from Wooyoung. The van can be suffocating as much as I enjoy living with him.”

You wondered if this beautiful place was next on the Guardian’s list for destruction. If you’d be able to come back ever again. If it too would disappear with every trace you’d left.

“You’re frowning again,” San’s voice pulled you out of your trance, making you focus on him instead. His face was almost indiscernible in the night, but his eyes and the silver chain, shining around his neck, were illuminated by the moonlight. “You do this often.”

“I guess I’m not used to things like this.” Genuine in a world full of lies. “I feel like you’ll disappear.”

Taking a step closer to you, San put a finger under your chin, your eyes finding his once again. The electrifying feeling of his touch made you dizzy. Now, you could hear his steady heartbeat, with yours drumming in your ears. “I’ll never leave you, angel.”

The moment his lips found yours, enveloping them in a soft kiss, you lost all of your senses and surrendered yourself to him. At first, his touch was gentle as if San was afraid he would hurt you, but once your hands found his neck, your fingers toying with his hair, he got more desperate for you. His own trailed slowly down the sides of your body, wrapping them around your waist and pulling you closer to him. Already out of breath, you felt a fire ignite in your soul that only San could put out.

He left your lips only to place a few shy kisses down your neck, your heart picking up its rate, slamming against your ribcage. Leaving you gasping and wanting more, San pulled away seconds later, the love and adoration you saw in his eyes making you lose your bearings completely. Cupping your cheeks and bringing his face closer, he rubbed your nose gently with his before placing a kiss on your forehead.

“The final round is coming soon, Y/N,” he murmured when you closed the distance between you, hugging him around his waist and burrowing your face at the crook of his neck. You took in his scent - woody and musky, hypnotizing you. “We’ll see the new world together.”

Even if that was just an empty promise and even if this new world never came to life, you didn’t care.

All you needed was San there with you - everything else was bearable.

final round, © moanz111

please do not modify, copy, repost, or translate.

#final round - moanz111 #ateez imagines #ateez oneshot #ateez scenarios #ateez fic #ateez fanfic #san x y/n #san x reader #san x you #ateez au #ateez fluff #ateez angst #san fluff #san angst

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luvyurself · 3 months

Text

from a cat into a dog

IM SORRY IF THE ENDING SUCKS AUGHHHH

part two of my last story here

c/w: she/her pronouns, implied child experimenting/employee experimenting ig, bigger bodies initiative snatches five kids and two adults (not clickbait), rushed ending

I tired my best to included the kids before they got turned into the smiling critters but AUGHHH

________

everyday was the same routine: wake up at six in the morning, freshen up, put on her work uniform, stick a breakfast sandwich in her mouth, kiss her mom goodbye, make her way to work, and get into the parking lot of playtime co. at around 6:45.

she wishes the playcare was more easily accessible, going from the toy train to the cart-ride while listening to the same automated introduction to playcare was starting to become irritating.

she basically had that whole thing memorized by now.

she sits in the trolly seat, looking out the tinted windows to the vast emptiness of the underground around them. why would they built this whole thing underground anyway? she even heard one employee share the same thought as her, she wonders if these kids even know of the outside world anyways.

these past few weeks have been the same, except a lot more children seemed to get adopted more. which is weird because she and the other employees around her never gotten informed when each kid would be picked up.

what’s even more weirder was that the kids never talked about getting adopted either. and these kids could not keep anything a secret.

even when she had to keep up with the rules of not interacting with the children, they just seemed to tell her and the other caretakers nearly everything that happened in their secluded lifestyle.

timothy was one of them. a hyper kid, always seemed to be getting some bumps or bruises (she started keeping a package of bandages after the third time he scrapped his knee), and never knew how to keep a secret.

he would run to of her, stop suddenly and give his one missing tooth smile, and point to some random kid saying, “they have a crush on that kid!” and run off with some other kids chasing after him, yelling incoherent nonsense about how he’s a ‘tattletale’ or something like that.

it was funny to watch, she would give a small smile as she watched the boys play fight, the girls act out some fairytale adventure, or some of the more reclusive kids either draw or play with toys to themselves.

timothy played with this girl, layla, who was just as hyperactive as he was. she was one of the rougher girls, but she loved secretly playing dress up with a few of her dolls she had in her shared room.

she remembered the little freckled girl pointing at her when she told her that ‘tippity top secret’, her cheeks puffed out and saying she better not tell anyone about her ‘soft side’.

kids were funny in many ways.

she remembered timothy sulking a bit when layla was adopted, pouting and sitting on the fake grass.

they hung out almost everyday, it was pretty sad to see him so bummed out over losing his best friend. she managed to sneakily talk to him about it, giving him words of comfort on how he’ll probably see her real soon.

that slightly made him perk up, especially when she slipped a small candy to him and put a finger to her mouth in a shushing motion. he giggled and gave his little grin, “maybe when I get adopted, me and layla can play all day long again!”

she hoped that was the case, as three days later, timothy was gone from the playcare.

she can’t help but feel a jab in her heart when the kids she talks to leave to get adopted. they were all so sweet and fun to watch and talk too.

especially two little girls who took decided they wanted to sit where she was watching the kids play.

delilah was this shy girl who spent most of her time drawing with markers, glitter, crayons and colored pencils. she would sit in the same spot theo sat before he left, silently drawing or politely asking for more colors.

the next girl was sophie, and that kid was a hugger. she would come to her everyday, her braids having different colorful clips then before, and give her leg a big hug.

she would babble on and on about how her school day was, seemingly never ending as the kid always had something to talk about. she would pick at the jewelry on the caretakers hands, asking where she had got it from and if she could get her one like that.

sophie would also talk to delilah too, and would join her on drawing whatever their little hearts desired.

the day delilah ran to her with pure excitement, was the same day she was destined to leave the playcare.

she was the only one that told the playcare employee that she was getting adopted. she excitedly talked the whole time she was there, explaining on how lovely the couple sounded when she heard of them. that was probably the most she ever heard her talk.

after delilah left, sophie hung around her a lot more, becoming more clingy when she had to leave.

she had to always reassure her that she was going to come back the next day. even when the kid latched onto her leg like a koala, she couldn’t fight back the smile on her lips.

sophie would always make her pinky swear she was going to come back. children and their ways of reassurance was always so cute.

she would lock pinkies with her, shaking them and giving the same repeated promise. sophie would look at her for a second, before smiling and hugging her tightly, saying how she can’t wait to see her the next day.

was this becoming a pattern?

each kid she interacted with was gone in the same couple of weeks. she was teased a bit by her other employees that she was cursed, but she jabbed back with how they were all in better homes anyway.

she remembers the last one, she never interacted with her as much as the other kids, but the girl was always holding some type of snack in her hands.

little percilla was always eating something, an apple, pb & j, she would always have some type of food on her face.

each of those kids had their own distinct personalities, and each made her heart ache even more when she never sees them in the playcare.

she gives a small sigh, the underground outside the windows no longer fascinating as it was the first three times.

the five minute way there felt like forever, the carts top speed seemed like five miles, so she decided to check her little phone for any new messages.

a few texts from her friends, her mom asking what should they eat for dinner, and exactly none from jean since two weeks ago.

she didn’t know why it hurt when jean stopped messaging her. maybe that new promotion took up all of his time? she didn’t see much of sean either, so she guessed that could be the case.

she didn’t want to bombard him with messages either, so she hadn’t text back since the last text he sent her.

she closed the phone and puts it in her pocket once he heard the end of the automatic announcement that played in the cart, the ride coming to a full stop.

she gets up and stretched her body, stepping out into the playcare as she makes her way to the consolers office to check in. the playcare was empty, except for a few employees here and there. the kids must be asleep still.

she pushes a strand of hair back, fixing any wrinkles in her clothes and pushes forth, hopefully to get some work done before she has to be out to watch the-

“Hello there!” that scream definitely didn’t come from her, that was definitely someone else.

she spun around to see who decided on scaring the ever living life out of her, but she was met with twelve feet of-what is that?

she stumbled back, nearly losing her footing and quickly regaining it, hands gripping her chest to calm herself as she looked up at the face.

the orange dog bent down slightly, a friendly smile on his face, “woah there, friend, I didn’t mean to knock you off your feet,” he spoke, the young women pushing her hair out of her face and sputtering out, “dog…..dogday?” she whispered, blinking in confusion.

she could see out of the corner of her eye his tail wagging, “yeah! that’s me! it’s nice to meet you….?” he drags out the sentence, waiting for her to finish with her name.

she stays silent with a confused look on her face before stuttering out her name.

he repeats it with joy, grabbing her hand and shaking it with excitement, “oh it’s so nice to meet you! I’ve just about said hi to every employee here and I’ve gotta say, you look amazing on this fine day-“ she let the dog ramble on while continuing to shake her hand, still staring at him in amazement.

the main question ringing in her mind: ‘how?’

and the other one: ‘why?’

she wasn’t unaware of elliot ludwigs determined goal to make the best toys, but even then….this seemed out of the realm of possibility for anyone to achieve.

the giant hand that shook hers felt soft, plush, and almost humanly warm. he even spoke so much like a person, making her think this was some guy in a suit.

but why was he so tall? he stands taller then everyone in this place! and the tail wagging behind him just made it so….realistic.

after about a full two minutes of handshaking and rambling, dogday finally let’s go of her hand (which her whole arm is now numb at that point) and waved a hand in front of her face.

“hello? you still in there, friend?” he asked, snapping her out of her thoughts.

she blinked once, before clearing her throat, “uh…..barely.” she spoke, rubbing her arm as she backs away, “I…..gotta clock in.”

the hound tilts his head, before walking with her, “I’ll tag along, I’m not technically supposed to be out here anyway,” he waved his hand around nonchalantly, “but I wanted to say hi to everyone before the kids wake up.” he gave his cartoony smile.

she shook her head, giving him an awkward grin, “oh no, it’s fine, you can do-“

a large, purple tail wrapped around her legs, going softly around before she was face to legs with another 12 foot animal.

catnap, she remembered the name, looked down at her with a silent stare, tilting his head to look at her.

he pressed his face near hers, giving it a sniff before pulling away, and turning towards the orange dog.

“catnap! I’ve seen you met my new friend!” he exclaimed, tail seemingly wagging faster. the purple cat stayed silent for a moment, before nudging his head in a different direction.

a playful groan came from dogday, “come on, I was just trying to walk my friend to the office to get checked in!” he pressed his big hand to his chest, playfully puffing or out, “as the leader, it’s my duty to greet and help anyone I come across.”

catnap just tilts his head, still not saying anything as his tail moves to press him towards the direction he came from.

she watched as he had a one way conversation with the cat, giving them an awkward laugh as she waved her hand, “it’s fine, really, you guys should go, don’t…..want to get in trouble do you?”

they both turned towards her, both in silence before dogday nods, “only if you say so, friend” he smiles and waved at her, “I’ll see you in a bit, then!” he turned to walk away, his tail still wagging happily behind him.

catnap lingered on for a moment, staring at her silently.

she smiled and waved at him, “I’ll see you in a bit too, catnap.”

she turned to walk towards the counselors office, glancing at the time and noticing the kids will be awake in ten minutes. well, the paper work was going to have to wait then.

watching as she walked into the office, catnap stared at the spot she was at for a moment longer.

he then stretched his back, and turned around were his orange friend walked to wait for the kids to wake up.

#dogday poppy playtime #poppy playtime #catnap poppy playtime #dogday #catnap #poppy playtime chapter 3 #x reader #x female reader #ppt x reader

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lou-struck · 1 year

Text

Coming Home

Izuku Midoriya x reader

~Izuku has worked three days straight on a rescue mission and you are ready for your hero to come home.

WC: 1.4k

Warnings: Mentions of injury, rescue missions gone awry, loneliness, overworking, mutual apologizing for something out of their control, a bit of angst but with a happy ending.

*reposting because when I post on mobile the tags don't work.

You have never felt so aware of the sound of your own knife scratching across your glass plate. The screeching scrape fills your empty home as you try to eat the meal you had just cooked, only to feel your appetite being robbed by the deep-set feeling of worry in your gut.

Your eyes flick between the empty place setting across from your own and the front door, hoping, praying that Izuku will come home safe tonight.

This nightmare had begun three days ago in the small hours of the morning when a group of villains managed to board and hijack a small underground train line filled with commuting passengers.

The railways have been shut down completely, and you heard through the grapevine that the Villains are beginning to panic, disagreeing amongst themselves about what they should be asking for as a ransom for all the lives in their possession.

With Law Enforcement at a standstill, they called in the Pro's Izuku, being chosen as one of the country's top heroes, to go underground, infiltrate the stopped train, and put an end to this whole nightmare.

Before leaving, he had told you that this mission was supposed to only take a few hours and that he promised to be home for dinner, but that wasn't the case. The villains chose to stop the train in a dead cell zone meaning that the rescue team has no service in the tunnels. You haven't heard anything from Izuku since that morning. You were assured that he was still safe, but the mission has taken much longer than normal.

The media is also in the dark about what is going on, and they keep playing the same initial cell phone footage that one of the passengers took before the train was stopped, along with a few interviews from the hostage's loved ones.

It's maddening.

And so the television remains off.

With a heavy sigh, you get up from your place at the table and stare at the mess awaiting you. Unable to keep the food warm any longer, you began to put it away carefully. It looks like Izuku won't be home anytime soon.

Before you put everything away, you take out a special Tupperware container. One that has multiple compartments for each of the dishes that you made tonight.

If Izuku comes home in the middle of the night, he will have a full home-cooked meal waiting for him. With his meal boxed up, you place the container on top of the other two in the fridge. The untouched, multicolored lids only make you feel more lonely.

It doesn't seem fair to rest while Izuku is working overtime, doing god knows what. Although the details make you sick to your stomach, you have to check for updates.

Plopping down on the couch, you turn on the television to check the broadcast, hoping for new footage, a progress report, anything.

But the broadcast has stopped completely, which can only mean one thing. The mission has ended.

Izuku is coming home.

These last three days of radio silence have placed a heavy weight on your chest. And with the initial disaster dealt with, you feel a bit lighter, but it won't be fully lifted until you can stare into Izuku's loving green eyes and hold him close.

You've been watching the driveway for what seems like forever, but you don't see him pull up. Only the headlights of a few passing vehicles mock you.

Until you hear the sound of the front door opening curiously, you walk towards the sound. Even in low lighting, you are able to make out the familiar figure leaving up against the doorway.

"Honey, I'm home," he calls, stumbling through the door. He looks exhausted, his skin looks sickly pale and deep dark circles rest under his eyes, and various scrapes and scratches litter his arms.

"Zuku?" you ask, stepping towards him cautiously, "Are you hurt."

He reaches forward and envelops you in a hug, "M' okay," he says, "just wanted to see you."

His tired words make your heart flutter, and you run your fingers through his messy green hair, gently untangling a few strands. "How long has it been since you've gotten to rest, Zuku?"

"I dunno, 3 days?' he hums; you notice how limp his body is on top of you. "The agency wouldn't let me drive home, so I had to call a cab."

"After 72 hours, I wouldn't let you drive either." You say, brow furrowing in concern. "Come on, let's get you to bed."

You try to turn towards the bedroom, but he stops you stubbornly. "No, I can't stop now," he murmurs into the crook of your neck, his figure sways tiredly. "I have people to rescue."

"Shhh, they're safe." you soothe, "you saved them; let's get some rest."

He nods, and you help him to the room. His lids flutter sleepily as he sits down on the mattress. But he doesn't take his eyes off you for a second. He hardly has enough strength to sit when you try to let go of his hand to grab a sleep shirt for him. His grip tightens protectively. "Where are you going?"

"I'm just grabbing you something soft to change into Zuku," you answer, shaking off his grip.

"Oh, you're so smart, y/n." he chuckles tiredly. "I've missed you. Did you know that?"

You toss the shirt over to him for him to put on. "I've missed you too," You wouldn't dare tell him this when he is in this kind of deliriously tired state, but his hero suit reeks, and the sooner he gets it off, the better.

You watch as he unzips his suit and tosses it on the ground; although the look of his chiseled chest and abs usually are breathtaking, now you cannot take your eyes off of the deep bruises and scrapes from under the suit. You feel uneasy looking at the marks, but you can't look away, even after they have been covered up by the clean sleep shirt.

He notices this, and his face falls suddenly. He looks guilty. "The mission… didn't quite go as planned," he mumbles, smoothing out a wrinkle in his shirt self-consciously.

"I know," you say, noticing just how small your voice sounds. "You helped a lot of people though, Zuku." You sit down on the edge of the bed as he does the same.

"Still," he sighs, leaning back onto the sheets, not trusting himself to look at you. "I know I let you down, and I worried you. I don't like making you feel this way."

His words make your eyes turn glassy, and you let out a shaky breath to hide the choked sob that threatens to escape your lips. Your relationship isn't rocky or anything, but Izuku hates to let you down. The whole situation is weighing on him much more than you had thought.

You scoot much closer to his side of the bed and grab his hand. "Hey, look at me. Please?" you murmur. He turns his head, and you see that his eyes look just as teary as yours must be. "You're a hero; things like this happen," you say, giving him the most comforting smile you can muster. "I just worried about you."

"But I want to be a Hero for you, too," he mumbles, raising the back of your hand to his lips and kissing it softly. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to tell you what was going on. I wanted to more than anything, but I- I couldn't." He looks so tired, but he is using the last bit of his energy to stay awake, to stay present for you. He has the biggest heart.

"I know," you say, "And we can spend these next few days taking it easy together. But for now, you need to get some rest, Izuku."

"A-are you sure?"

"I'm positive," you smile, curling up next to him. As soon as he lays back fully on the pillow, he is out, and the soft sounds of his breathing fills the room. Even in sleep, he pulls you closer; the weight of his arms around you is so comforting; you feel in that moment that nothing can hurt you.

Because he is here.

#bnha x reader #my hero academia #bnha #izuku x reader #deku #midoriya #izuku midoriya x reader #deku x reader #midoriya x reader #izuku midoriya

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lumpsbumpsandwhumps · 3 months

Note

uhh good old fashioned forced to kneel (maybe in front of a mafia boss after failing a job), maybe pistol whipping involved

hehehehehe

It was useless to struggle. You knew it was useless to struggle. You struggled many times in the past and had never been able to make the man budge once, so why you thought this time would be any different was wasted effort on your part. Still, you couldn't help the instinctual need to fight against the thick arm coiled around your waist that dragged you deeper into the underground vault.

I've gotten you approved for a transfer to one of our sister locations, your former manager said. It's in a higher end district so there's tighter safety measures in place, she said. You won't need to let that fear hold you back again, she said.

In her defense, she couldn't have possibly been able to be able to predict just two months later this bank would also be targeted. By the same group of men, no less. Well, you assumed they were the same, based off the similar physiques and coordinated masks. Skullface and his vintage Halloween counterparts were absent this time, instead being replaced with plastic faces of dog breeds. You were currently experiencing the joy yet again of being manhandled by Rottweiler and you had no doubt his bite would be worse than his bark.

As soon as you were escorted into the vault meant to store customers' safety deposit boxes, the arm hauling you along dropped to let you stumble. Thankfully, only your wrists were bound in zipties, leaving your wobbly legs to hightail it back towards the entrance before the collar of your shirt was seized. With a grunt, you were thrown against one of the metal tables, taking the brunt of the impact with your hip. You were caged in between thick limbs on either side, allowing the robber to crowd your space and practically swallow you whole with his massive build.

This close, you could smell the gunpowder and ash that clung to his jacket. Somewhere deep within the caverns of the mask's eyeholes, you might have been able to catch a wisp of pale lashes. But you weren't too concerned with that right now, not when you knew good and well that you had earned the ire of a dangerous man.

"What the fuck was that?" he hissed, having to lean down to accommodate for the difference in height. You could only curve your back so far against the blunt edge of the table to make distance.

Initially, you weren't going to give him the satisfaction of an answer. Not that you didn't want to, of course; a scathing fuck you burning on the tip of your tongue. You were smart enough to know that a tiger would only tolerate being poked so many times with a stick. The fact that you tried to sabotage the dye packs when his back was turned was more akin to jabbing a stick straight into its eye. It was a miracle you weren't shot dead then and there.

Your lack of response was grinding further on his nerves, made evident when his gloved hand grabbed you by the jaw. His fingers dug into the hollows of your cheeks, sure to leave little purple bruises around the outline of your teeth. The last time he held your face like this was to forcefully pucker your lips, now free of their gag, to share a mock kiss between you and the plastic mouth of his skull mask before your were shoved out of a moving getaway vehicle. A quick peck probably wasn't on his mind right now, though.

"No, really," he insisted with the same, clipped edge in his tone, "I want to know what the fuck was going on inside that empty little head of your's to think that was a good idea."

Even with your face being squeezed, you managed to talk around his fingers, hoping that your matching glare would make up for any slurred speech. "Would'a made y' eas'er t'catch."

Oh, if masks could speak, there was no doubt the Rottweiler sharing his face would be latching its teeth around your throat with a snarl. In fact, you almost thought that was what the criminal was rearing to do when he briefly freed you from your prison to straighten his stance. No sooner had those arms released you was one swinging down from your peripheral, too fast for you to consider dodging. The butt of his gun cracked against your cheekbone, your teeth cutting against your already bruising flesh and threatening to loosen from the gums completely.

The pain took a few seconds to register after the initial hit. For a moment, you worried that you had been shot rather than pistol whipped with how your vision flashed white and your were deafened by the ringing in your ears. A moment later and a fiery ache bloomed across the entire left side of your face. Pain throbbed with each heartbeat that echoed in your head, tingling from the roots of your teeth and the expanse of your lower jaw, only tapering out somewhat under your eye.

Blood welled on your tongue, thick and bitter, from a cut or something broken you couldn't be certain of yet. Not only had you been rendered speechless by the agony coursing red hot under your skin, but the knock to the head was more than enough to make your knees buckle in a dizzying daze. You tipped forward, almost about to faceplant right into Rottweiler's bulletproof vest, but instead he let you stumble hard onto your knees in front of him. Well, at least being on the partially on the floor meant you didn't have to mind where the glob of saliva and blood landed when you spat it out.

You couldn't help but groan, not sure if your swollen tongue would be able to make anything else coherent enough. What was there to say, anyways? More taunts, a string of expletives, apologies meant to plead for forgiveness? There was nothing you could think of with how your thoughts were too rattled in your brain. Nothing worth the pain of opening and closing your mouth with cracked teeth, that is.

Leather fingers buried themselves deep in your hair, grasping at the roots to ensure a tight hold when they yanked your head up and back. You gasped, a sudden wave of nausea hitting you just as hard as the glock had. Stars had to be rapidly blinked away before your vision could focus on the Rottweiler staring down at you. If he wanted to, he would be able to snap your neck with just a flick of his wrist. Hell, he could have always done that whenever he wanted to, just as he could have shot you or stabbed you or strangled you at any point of your hostageship. Both current and previous.

But he didn't, even when you knew you deserved it. Even when you knew other innocent bystanders had suffered for lesser, if any, infringements during a heist.

Again, the gun made its appearance out of the corner of your eye, taunting your with its proximity. Rather than bash the other side of your face to even out the damage, the cool metal of the barrel pressed sharply to the cheek that was just assaulted. The molar under it shifted, causing your eyes to water. You really hoped the dental insurance your employer offered covered this kind of work.

"If you didn't look so good on your knees, I'd pull the trigger," the robber sneered. If your face wasn't already burning with pain, it would be running twice as hot with shame. "Now don't make me find a better use for that mouth, love."

Tomorrow sounded like a good day to call out sick.

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1wishand1thought · 1 year

Text

MY SNEAKY LITTLE FOX| PART 2

Kaz Brekker x Fem. Y/N

Here you have part 1, in case you haven't read it yet: part 1

Summary: Kaz struggles to keep y/n out of his mind, her absence making him worried about the possibility of losing his most secret investment. The uncertainty of her presence in Ketterdam forces him to get into deep waters, using his knowledge to get to where she lives, only to find himself lost in the sound of her voice.

Warnings: NSFW/ Nudity descriptions, naughty vocabulary(is that even the right word? I only see this as poetic writing lmao, OKAY SORRY. let's continue).

A/N: OH SAINTS THIS ONE WAS A WHOLE CHALLENGE GUYS. I had a clear path to write this, and then a million Kruge stepped in my way avoiding me to keep going. Seriously, I lost motivation like Jesper lost money when betting. Anyway I hope you like it, it's a bit longer than the first one, I'll put the word count later. LOVE YOU, TKYSM FOR 114 NOTES IN PART 1🫶🏻🥹

Wordcount: 3417.

A week had passed since the incident. A whole damn week where her inner struggles to not think of him just got worse.

The night washed over the city, only with the twilight and the stars flickers enlightening the dark and empty streets of the city. She was in her house now, an underground place in Ketterdam.

Y/n paced back and forth as if she was trying to solve a puzzle to finally ease her thoughts, but instead, failed every time. Her mind kept replaying his voice, as she had memorized every detail, treating it like a meticulous plan: no flaws or loose ends. All she wanted was to forget him, to comply with the words that left his mouth like a hundred bullets:

"You better keep your mouth shut and never bring this up in a conversation ever again, y/n... Or else you'll regret it for the rest of your days," he had warned her back then, as he covered his bare hands with a pair of leathery gloves.

She regretted everything about that night; the way his neck seemed so tight, as if he was a disguised thief, holding back a painful scream. She remembered how the vein on the side of his forehead pumped fiercely as if it was trying to break free from his face. Anger rose inside her.

Why did he let her watch?

Was that a sort of "taunting you because I know all your secrets" improvised joke? Because yes, she felt the heat and arousal bubbling inside her when he fidgeted with his shaft that night. She even felt as if she was the damn cock in his hands.

But did he know all her secrets? Did he know that she hadn't reached the climax in years? Perhaps he even knew where she lived. It aggravated her that he let her see him in such a vulnerable state, so intime, so... appealing.

A tattoo was carved into her frightened mind. Did he do it to taunt her, then? Does he know all about her?

She discarded every suggestion. The only personal information she had divulged to Kaz was her name and skills. She had also warned him to keep her recruitment a secret, and maybe she had even mentioned how she preferred to keep to herself rather than socialize with the people of Ketterdam. So all her personal information was deeply buried in her mind.

What she had yet to realize was that Kaz had her entire birth chart stored in a well-guarded section of his restless brain. He always found a way to know everything, as he couldn't bear not knowing it all.

He somehow, and with the help of his witty brain, managed to get her full name and the address to her place. He had also discovered details about her lineage and parents, who were long gone either to hell or with the saints. It wasn't much, but considering the time it took him to obtain such valuable information, it was certainly something.

Y/n hadn't even sneaked near the Barrel to eavesdrop from outside Kaz's office. Her eyes were glued to the stonewall in front of her now, and the cold moonlight brought back memories of Kaz's figure. His image haunted her like a nightmare, constantly invading her thoughts for the past seven days.

She needed to let go, but she was certain she couldn't do it. She hissed in frustration, her back landing on the bed behind her. The cold bedspread sent shivers through her warm body. She was only wearing her underclothes, as she was alone in her home.

The place had no walls dividing the spaces except for the bathtub and toilet in the corner, where no natural light reflected on the porcelain washbasin or bath other than the warm light of the candles she had spread there.

Her gaze drifted back to the long, narrow window that looked out onto the bustling street above. In the morning and through the murky glass, she could make out the feet of pedestrians as they hurried past. It was a small connection to the outside world that faded at night. No pedestrians were outside now, mostly because all the nearby buildings were full of early workers and showmen waiting for the early hours to head back to their workspaces.

A few candles illuminated the dining room placed a few steps away from the kitchen, the warm light spread only to the border of her bed and collided with the cold tone of the moon. Still, the kitchen was dark, as the candlelight reflected on the only tall furniture in the kitchen. The stone step separating the table from her bedroom space prevented her from having a clear view of the entrance.

Back at the club, Kaz's stress had accumulated in the last few days and had now reached its peak. He fidgeted with the crow head holder of his cane as he sat in his office, his eyes fixated on the wall, his breath coming out in short, heavy gasps. His free hand tightly gripped the edge of his desk, causing his knuckles to turn white beneath the fabric.

To his right, a half-empty bottle of brandy sat on his desk, and untouched papers and bills piled up in a messy tower before him. He couldn't focus on them, not with her image haunting his thoughts.

《Where are you?》 he wondered as his mind drifted back to her face. He could recall the subtle movements of her thighs, the panic in her blushed cheeks as she tried not to get caught. It was all too appealing.

It was for the best that he cut the emotional ties with her. He had a club to run, money to make, and he couldn't afford any distractions. But he needed her for the job. He needed her unique set of skills. The way she could vanish into the shadows of Ketterdam like Inej once did. The only difference between them being a few distinguishable features.

He considered going to check if she was there, fearing that she might have left Ketterdam after their last encounter. He needed to be certain of her presence, otherwise, he would have to find someone else to do her job, which he didn't want to do.

As time passed, his anxiety grew, and he was unable to shake the memories of her from his mind. His thoughts were in turmoil, and he knew he needed to find a way to focus before it was too late. It shouldn't have been difficult to concentrate, given that he didn't like her.

Kaz didn't even realize when he left his office, unconsciously stepping out and leaving his cane on his desk. He didn't scold Jesper for flirting with Wylan at the bar when he was supposed to be working. Of course, the couple wondered where their boss was going, but neither of them dared to ask him about it. He seemed lost in thought as his leg wobbled a bit from the imbalance. His frown was deeper than usual, and one of his gloved hands was clenched into a fist at his side.

Fortunately, her place was not too far from the club, but it was far enough that, as if by a miracle, her slightly warm body became warmer, her cheeks flushed, and eventually, after a few minutes, she found herself breathing heavily. Her hands moved in time with her thoughts, and the images of Kaz, so vivid in her mind, only served to fuel her fire. She had done this a few times in the last week to try to free her mind of the torture his image spur her to do, at the same time that she put all her efforts to release the moan fighting to come out. This time felt different, as if her body knew something she didn't.

Unbeknownst to her, Kaz was nearby, clenching his teeth so tightly that it made his jaw hurt. It made him wonder if it was due to her absence from work, or the way she made him feel that produced this sort of reactive action.

He knew a knock on the door would be odd, considering that she told him she was not a very social person, hence didn't have any friends.

So, he decided to use his brain. He made sure to see if there was any visible light reflecting into the streets from the visible lower window almost glued to the floor. No light was visible. Good.

He knew she lived unseen in Ketterdam.

Like a fox hiding from the danger, without knowing the danger it held inside. He new it though, probably why he called her that.

He would just leave an envelope with the tasks he had for her and then he would leave. If she read it, she would show up in his office. If not, then she had made her choice very clear.

His lockpicking skills gave him easy access to her place. He tried to keep his limp as light as possible so as not to make his presence obvious. He opened the door with little noise, which was surprising considering it was a wooden door. However, the floor was made of pure stone.

He noticed the dark, small kitchen and immediately took in the warm light of the candles illuminating the rest of the space.

He thought she might have left the candles on, so he didn't take a wider glimpse of the room. He left the envelope on the dark counter and right after reaching for the door handle, he heard it.

His feet locked to the floor, and his chest stopped. Kaz turned his head to the side to take in the sound more clearly. It was as if someone was having a nightmare, with uneven but barely audible breaths. The table and chairs of the tiny dining room obstructed his view, preventing him from seeing the full scene.

His feet moved as a reflex, after silently closing the door before him, he took some cautious and slow steps forward. And then, when he got a clear view, a flame that he feared had been extinguished was ignited from the ashes, burning fiercely inside him. Evaporating all his senses of destruction and vengeance, and replacing them with a gutting desire.

He took in the scene, his hands were sweaty, his mouth slightly opened, and his chest heaving.

Whimpers.

He froze, not making a sound; like a sculpture, he didn't move a muscle. He just stood there, transfixed by the sight before him, his eyes locked on it.

On her.

She was caressing herself, one hand occupied with her breasts, fidgeting with her nipples, and the other under her panties. Her eyes were closed, portraying pain and torture, but deep inside her arousal increased with every touch.

She unlocked a part of her mind that allowed her to visualize Kaz in front of her. As she seemed to have found her only inspiration that may allow her to finally cum. Something she had avoided the last week.

She tried before touching herself thinking of something else, making up someone else’s face in her mind, failing relentlessly every time.

Now, in her mind, a bulge was evident in Kaz's usual black pants, his hands bare, and his cheeks flushed. The image made her wince from pleasure. Her lower lip was tugged between her teeth. Each brush of her hand made her body quake.

A few seconds later she opened her eyes, and she swore she saw her boss's face.

There, in the darkness.

He was staring at her intently, and for a moment, she stopped, bewildered. Her red cheeks acted like fire in her body, burning her entirely with embarrassment and excitement.

《Why are you stopping? I didn't stop when you caught me jerking off》 He thought. His brain took such action as offensive, breaking the pleasant view.

"Don't," the shadow spoke, panting, desperate, and begging almost.

Kaz Brekker wasn't the type of man who begged, not even when he was staring death itself in the face. But now his mind betrayed him, his words being a reflex to his needs.

His dark figure leaned closer to the bed, finally revealing his pale temple. Y/n's heart hammered in her chest as if it was trying to escape like a frightened child. "Don't... don't stop, y/n," There it was again, his voice roaring. His thoughts now sprinting out of an opened cage that would be too hard to lock again given the view. His hoarse and needy voice echoed along her soft gasps.

It took a few seconds for her to realize it wasn't a trick, it wasn't a hologram, something impossible to touch. Kaz Brekker was in front of her, his jaw looked tight, his expression sharp like a blade cutting trough her; his gaze taking in every inch of her skin.

He was like a starved animal waiting to finally get its prey after several failed attempts. He watched every movement, enjoying what he had craved several times where only his imagination was able to put it to work. Now, being real and having her in flesh and bones before him, he didn't want her to stop, nor would he allow it.

It felt as if the candles turned into a hundred torches. The heat around them was both pleasing and hurtful. He wanted to touch her, but somehow his hands were blocked to each side of his body. Loose strands of hair fell over his eyes, but it didn't act as a distraction, his focus being only on her figure. The drip of the several candles blended with the sound of her wet pussy.

His sharp blue eyes found their way to hers, an invisible string forcing to look each other, making it impossible for any of them to break eye contact.

Kaz made his way in front of the bed and sat in the nearby wooden chair. His Adam's apple wobbled as he swallowed hard. The bulge in his pants was evident now, just as y/n had imagined minutes ago.

"What...," her voice cracked, making it impossible for her greedy self to form a full sentence as she was overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment. He cut her off sharply, in a demanding tone.

"Shush," he growled, the usual gelid expression covering his face entirely. He was fighting the urge to take his glove off and replace her own hands with his.

Oh, he wanted to squeeze those tits and lick her nipples so badly.

However, his hands still wouldn't move. He felt like a prisoner in his own body, struggling to break free. The uncertainty of how his body would react when he touched her still lingered in his mind.

"Just keep doing it," he demanded, his eyes moving from her face to between her legs, as to try to send her an indirect message of what to do next.

She pushed her underwear aside, mostly due to the desperation taking over her entire body, and for the hint she caught in his eyes. Her wet cunt being visible now.

Y/n closed her eyes, enjoying how she felt when she fingered herself, just as he enjoyed watching her doing so. Her mouth gaped as the shivers she felt took her higher with every touch, the orgasm closer with every passing second.

"Open your eyes," Kaz urged, his voice growing deeper and more desperate. He felt his dick pumping, trying to break free and holding back the urge to cum right then beneath the black fabric.

An inner fight with his mind allowed him to move again a few moments later. A pair of eager hands unbuttoned his pants, showing his greedy bulge over his black boxers.

Y/n complied with his orders and opened her eyes, only to catch him with his gloved hands now full of his cock, just like the other night, adding the fact that she was also with her hands occupied doing the same to herself.

He didn't even bother in taking his gloves off; he just needed to stroke it.

It went on for a few more minutes, with him watching her thrust her fingers in and out of her pussy faster, and she watched him stroking his dick. Both of them, with their arousals and voices, provided the only sound that bounced off every wall, echoing in their ears and carving like an unforgettable memory inside their minds.

With their eyes locked onto each other, their hands fully occupied, and a layer of sweat on their faces under the warm light of the candles, they finally came. Kaz was the first one, and he was more silent this time given all he wanted to hear was her, as he'd imagined: her voice breaking, her legs squirting, her chest going up and down as if she had just run a marathon throughout all of Kerch. He wanted to hear her say his name.

Y/n came a few seconds later, her voice breaking, the sound louder than ever between the walls, she finally gave in, letting the moan out. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head, and the next words would carve in the deepest part of Kaz's mind, like a catchy song that only he could give himself the pleasure of repeating. "Fuck— Kaz!" She yelled, not so loud but enough to make Dirtyhands bite his lower lip.

He compared what he had imagined to the view before him, they were quite alike, except for the lack of Kaz's touch on her skin.

It took a few moments for Y/n to ease her breathing. Her eyes were fixed on the ceiling. Embarrassment washed over her as she didn't dare to look at the man in front of her.

His lips twisted and contorted into a crooked grin, revealing his satisfaction with what he had just seen. His usual dark eyes betrayed little emotion, but deep down he was afraid to accept the eagerness that burned within him. He wanted her and hoped to make her his right then and there, but the option of him panicking when touching her frightened his mind. It aggravated him: to have her in his gaze and not be able to feel her skin.

Hidden inside Kaz's heart, the flame was still on. He longed for the day when he would finally take his naked hands and feel how wet she was, with no intrusive thoughts in their way.

He took his right glove—now covered in cum– off, whilst still glaring at her body on the bed.

"I need your presence for the job," he muttered, ignoring the fact she was still naked, panting slightly, and her eyes lost in her thoughts.

She wasn't mad about him changing the topic. She hadn't yet found the words to say something anyways.

His normal façade cut sharp like a knife. He knew it was for the best. He tried to convince himself that there would not be a third occasion, given that, if he stood any longer, he would not cum over his gloves but on her stomach. And his hands would not be holding his cock but her hips, keeping her still in the bed.

"If you still want to work for me, I'll be expecting you tomorrow night at the usual time," he said, tilting his head toward her direction as he turned around to leave, taking her utter silence as a reply.

On the other hand, Kaz didn't want to say what echoed in his mind. An uncontrollable pull was trying to stop him from leaving, encouraging him to just give in to her. To finally betray his mind and let something other than revenge and money in his heavy heart, allowing his hands to touch someone else's skin.

He wanted to feel hers under his fingertips, to taste her breath in his mouth. Something that through the passing of months he never accepted until now. But words failed him as they often did, forcing him to repeat the same romantic situation he had with Inej years ago.

So, with the clicking sound of the door closing behind him, they gave an end to their interaction, which would allegedly be the last one, and both let out a long sigh of relief.

Putting an end to his torture of not being brave enough to touch her, and to her torment of not being able to feel his touch.

HII!! So, as I wrote at the beginning, writing this was a love-hate relationship considering my sudden motivation loss. I was so motivated writing this and then BANG, my mind goes blank as fast as Kaz's heart when he sees Inej haha.

Anyway, I really, reaaally hope you like it and if you don't then it's okay we can pretend that this doesn't exists 🫶🏻🤣

Tag list ( the lovely users that asked for a part two):

@outlawqueen17 @bunneex

@tiana76 @freddycarterswife

#kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker oneshot #kaz brekker smut #kaz brekker #six of crows #six of crows one shot

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kawaiikenna · 2 years

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@leap-ing @elithemiar-blog @halfblackwolfdemon @winged-scaly-attic-dweller @spideypools @redfoxtail26 @manapeer @8000fangirl @antagonistly @all-eyes-no-dragon @mysticalcomputerdetective @01101010-01100001-01111001 @stealingyourbones

Hopefully that’s everyone. Anyways, here’s chapter two! Drop a kudos and comment over on ao3: Under the Earth; Far from Home. Angst, panic attacks, being buried alive, ptsd flashbacks, as well as depictions of a severely malnourished and emancipated Danny ahead. If any of this triggers you please be careful!

Jason had been ignoring the signs. The itch to go riding that would inevitably end at the cemetery where he had been buried. The feeling like he had something to do there. Some kind of unfinished business that he couldn’t remember. The amount of trauma that was linked with the place made it…difficult, for Jason to even think about going past the cemetery gates.

Both Dick and Tim had gone in to see if they could find anything. They didn’t and Jason tried to put the whole thing behind him. To forget about the whole ordeal. But something kept pulling him back. Now two weeks after he initially started feeling the strange pulling, Jason is standing before the gates. He stares at the wrought iron with a slight distain.

He takes a deep breath and pushes past the gates and into the cemetery. His burial plot was in the southeast corner. So he made his way over to it, hoping that it would make these feelings finally settle. As he passed row upon row of headstones, the feelings did not settle. If anything, something stirred in his chest. Something fearful and desperate. Jason was about to turn around and give up when something caught his eye.

Tucked away in an unkempt corner was a very recent grave. Initially he thought it was unmarked but upon a closer look Jason found a wooden plaque sunken into the muddy ground. It had hastily carved words; ‘To our beloved son. We wish we had known sooner.’

Jason picked up and turned the plaque over to see if there was a name. There was none. Only the words he had seen before. He neatly places the plaque back at the head of the grave.

“Your parents must have loved you a lot buddy.” Jason says, his emotions settling just a bit in his chest. “I hope you rest in peace.”

And as he was turning to leave, something happened. It was like the barest of whispers spoken directly into his mind. Quiet but desperate all the same.

help

Jason turns back towards the fresh grave. He doesn’t know why he did it, but he responded. Not really in words, more of a wave of morbid curiosity. The answering response he got nearly knocked him off his feet.

Help, help, buried, not dead, alive, alive, ALIVE.

An instant wave of panic took over his senses. Suddenly Jason was back in his own casket. Buried underground with no hope of help or rescue. Left alone to suffocate and die a second time.

He was on his knees clawing at the dirt before he knew what he was doing.

Alive, help, coming, safe?

He waited on baited breath. Hoping for a response. Anything that would tell him that the boy buried there was still clinging to life. The further he dug into the dirt the more desperate he became. It had rained recently, just the night prior, so the dirt had become heavy and sloppy. Even with it being freshly turned, the rain had packed it down some. Making it much more difficult to dig through.

No, no, hurt, alive, hurt.

Jason screams into the empty cemetery. He roughly shucks off his motorcycle jacket and his shirt. Leaving him in his boots, jeans, and white tank top. Tiny rocks and dirt shove themselves under his fingernails as he shovels and scoops dirt, throwing it haphazardly, only caring about hopefully, possibly saving the boy.

Jason continued to send mental waves of help and safety through whatever mind fuckery this was. With every desperate cry for help, he became more frenzied and desperate himself. Soon, far too soon, he hadn’t dug even two feet into the ground, he made first contact with the casket. What he wasn’t expecting was to be shocked and for green sparks to shoot out from the box in the ground. Jason pushes past it though. It wasn’t too painful, more of like the kind of static shock you would get as a kid playing on the trampoline. Slowly, too slowly, he uncovered more and more of the box. He had finally uncovered most of it when he noticed a sliding hatch closer to the head of the coffin-like box.

He was not prepared for what he saw on the other side of this tiny window. Blue eyes with a green shine stared up at him. Tear tracks running down his face, glowing a strange green. Black hair limp and lifeless, flopped to one side of the kid’s face. Skeletal hands and fingers pressed up against the mockery of a window as green sparks flitted about. A gaunt, skeletal frame shaking from the constant shock.

Jason hesitated for only a moment before nearly ripping the lid off of the coffin. Hydraulic hinges squealing in protest as stale air flooded out of the box. There was soft sobbing coming from the teen. Jason gently picked him up and pulled him out of the tiny prison. The teen shook in his arms but held tightly to Jason as if his very being depended on it. He was wearing a t-shirt and jeans with only socks on his feet. Everything was far too baggy on the boy, only testifying further that he was severely dehydrated and malnourished.

Jason whispered consoling words. What they meant he didn’t know, because at that moment the panic had finally swept him up. Flashbacks and anxiety threatened to swallow him up completely but was staved off by the quivering teen in his arms. It grounded him enough to keep a tight hold on the teen.

~~~

Jason wasn’t sure how long they had stayed down in the dug out grave. Long enough that the sky had turned from an almost dusky color to the city lightened smog of the night. The black haired teen had passed out into a deep sleep a while ago. When he had first fallen asleep Jason panicked, thinking that he had died. But a quick check showed that the teen was still breathing lightly and an impossibly slow heartbeat still thrummed in his chest.

Jason finally pulled them out of the somewhat shallow grave. He laid the teen in the grass and gathered up his clothing. Before he put his shirt back on, Jason chipped away all of the dried dirt on his arms. Anything that was still wet was scraped off and flicked into the grass. With his shirt back on he picks up his jacket and the teen, making their way back to his motorcycle by the gates.

He situated the teen to sit behind him on his bike. He used his jacket to secure the tiny, skeletal body to himself. Settling it over the sleeping teens shoulders then tying the sleeves around his own torso. Once Jason secured the teen as best he could, he took off into the night, phone ringing in his ear.

“Master Jason.” A prim and proper voice answered. “How can I help you this evening?”

“Hi Alfred. I’m going to need medical help.” Jason’s voice is gruff and water from the amount of screaming and tears he’s experienced in such a short time.

Alfred sighs. “What have you gotten yourself into that requires you to visit the Manor instead of your apartment?”

“I don’t need it. I found a boy buried alive in the same cemetery that I was buried in. He’s really weak, most likely severely dehydrated and malnourished. I-I’m not equipped to take care of something like this.” His voice is breaking slightly.

There was a moment of silence. The only sounds Jason could hear were the wind screaming in his ears and the muffled sounds of traffic. The panic he had shoved into the furthest darkest corner of his mind was starting to creep into his thoughts again.

“Alright. Bring him straight into the cave. I’ll have a bed ready for him and I’ll call Dr. Leslie in. I may be able to do many things, this however seems like a situation we need a professional opinion on.”

“Kay. I’ll see you then.”

#danny phantom #dp x dc #danny fenton #dc #dp #dc x dp #jason todd #dc comics #dpxdc #batfam #red hood #ficlet #tw: buried alive #tw: anxiety attack #Tw: severe malnourishment #tw: ptsd #tw: flashbacks #hopefully that’s all of the triggers #let me know if i missed anything

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fawnforevergone · 8 months

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Dante's Inferno References in Hozier's song "First Time" (+ a lil' song explanation) !!

Guys, I know I did the whole "Dante's Inferno references in 'Unreal Unearth'" already but I have thought of more things particularly with "First Time" and it's context of being in circle one, 'Limbo'.

Firstly, important context that 'Limbo' isn't so much a punishment as it is a placeholder in Inferno. It's for the unbaptized and virtuous pagans, essentially those who did not believe in God and therefore could not enter heaven, but also didn't do anything bad enough to be punished in the other eight circles. The punishment is to live eternally in circle one whilst feeling an infinite sensation of emptiness that is meant to represent the lack of God in their lives.

Now, moving onto the song and the GENIUS that it is.

"And the soul, if that's what you'd call it, uneasy ally of the body, felt as nameless as a river, undiscovered underground." The lost souls of Inferno find their way to their assigned circle by using the 'transportation system' of the five rivers of the Underworld. The first river that Dante and Virgil encounter is the river Acheron that Charon, the Greek psychopomp that transported souls through the underworld, delivers them down to arrive at Limbo.

Another one of the five rivers of the Underworld is the well-known river Styx that souls had to cross over in order to enter the afterlife. All of these things are referenced in this one lyric.

"And the first time that you kissed me I drank dry the river Lethe." Here, Hozier mentions another one of the five rivers. Those who drank from the Lethe would experience mental oblivion, unable to remember anything. Souls who were to be reincarnated usually drank from this river in order to forget their past lives. Hozier is also referencing the idea of being reborn, as he does throughout this whole song, but instead he's reborn by the relationship he has with his partner.

"As it was, and ever shall be, unearth without a name." This lyric seems to be a reference to the 'Glory Be' prayer - "As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end." As aforementioned, Limbo's punishment is a never-ending emptiness; It's described as sorrow without torment, something so deprived that rational minds couldn't comprehend it. Hozier's "unearth without a name" mirrors the prayer's "world without end", showing that Limbo has the same infinity that God intends the world to have, but Hozier cannot even put a name to the feeling of Limbo, only that it is underground.

"Some part of me must have died/Some part of me came alive the first time that you called me 'Baby'." This lyric repeats throughout the whole song with minor changes, and references back to that idea of being reborn that Hozier establishes from the very start of the album with "De selby (Part 1)". The album compares Hozier's relationship with his partner to the journey of 'Inferno', and here we see Hozier effectively 'dying' as the relationship begins, allowing him to enter Limbo reborn as who his lover made him.

"These days I think I owe my life to flowers that were left here by my mother. Ain't that like them, gifting life to you again?" Since we have the context that Hozier is now 'dead', this lyric can be seen as his mother leaving flowers on his grave, literally gifting his body life. In the following lyrics, Hozier compares his life in Limbo to the life of the flowers gifted to him.

"This life life lived mostly underground, unknowin' either sight nor sound, 'til reaching up for sunlight just to be ripped out by the stem." Flowers are birthed beneath the soil on Earth, as Hozier has been reborn beneath the world in Hell, both lives lived underground. The theme of darkness that is regularly visited in both 'Inferno' and the album is shown here "unknowin'...sight", where the darkness of Inferno simulates a sort of blindness. The second half of the lyric references that loss of hope in Limbo, mirroring it to the idea of a flower being torn away from its only purpose of growing - similarly to how a soul is torn from its only purpose of living.

"Sensing only now it's dyin', drying out then drowning blindly, bloomin' forth its every colours in the moments it has left." The literal meaning of this lyric is the act of pulling flowers from their roots to simply put them in vases of water. The metaphorical meaning is Hozier attempting to hold up hope in Limbo. "Unreal Unearth" is very clearly a breakup album, and "First Time" tells us the compressed story of the relationship from beginning to end. We can take this song as Hozier beginning to lose faith in his relationship but desperately holding on, the way flowers know they're dying in a vase but continue blooming nevertheless.

"To share the space with simple living things, infinitely suffering, but fighting off, like all creation, the absence of itself. Anyway." Again, this references the ideas of flowers dying in a vase whilst trying to live cut off from their roots. The idea of "infinitely suffering" gives us that imagery of Limbo, but "fighting off...the absence of itself" also emphasises Hozier's attempts to rekindle this relationship the way flowers ignore the prospect of death in the hopes of living for a few moments longer. This little "anyway" at the end gives us the impression that, like Limbo, this is hopeless, and, as the flowers will, Hozier's relationship will die.

"When I was young I used to guess, 'Are there limits to any emptiness'?" The whole third verse shows us the final breaking of the relationship, but this lyric shows us that specific hopelessness that is felt in the decay of love. It really wraps up the idea of Limbo in this relationship; this soft acceptance that their love has died no matter how hollow it makes Hozier feel.

I personally think he is once again a MASTERMIND. Relating the death of a relationship to the wilting of flowers, especially flowers forced to stay alive, is perfect, like are you kidding me. Anyway, yes! That's my extra fathoming of "First Time" because there is simply too much to say.

If anyone else has anything to say, please lmk because there's nothing more I love than a Hozier deep dive :]

#unreal unearth #hozier #first time #hozier's inferno #lyric analysis #dante's inferno #he's so smart #he's just. he's . ugh.#this album !!!#each time i listen i hear something new #music #music analysis #lyrics #one of the most overlooked songs on the album tbh #WOW #greek mythology

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swords-of-a-soilder · 4 months

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The Healing Process

Chapter 1

Confession and Bonfires

This is my first qsmp fic be nice to me; also this is some what outdated but everyone insisted I finish it anyways so here it is!

Cellbit eyes fell half lid as he phased into place, overlooking phill and Misa's home. He hadn't the proper chance to caught up since the events of purgatory, the exhaustion for the damage his body took put him out for weeks at least and the horrid vision of mind are ones he'd rather forget.

He slowly walked over to the front door of the home where he knocked for a whole 3 second, before then looking through the window.

The double bed remained empty amongst the wall of pictures, his eyes gazed back and forth as he search for any life, then sighed when he found none.

Cellbit was about to leave when he heard an iron door push open, he walked over to where he heard the sound watching Phill crawl from an underground base.

"Oi, Philza." Cellbit started

"Sup mate!" Phill greeted, he crawl his way out the hole completely, shutting the door behind him.

"I hope I'm not interrupting you, seem you were bu-" before Cellbit finished his sentence he experience a strong embrace from Phill, sending the younger gentleman into shock.

Finally Phill pulled away meeting Cellbit gaze, "I'm glad you're alright, I was worried you wouldn't make it back." He confessed

Cellbit blink momentarily before his brain flowed again, "I'm glad to see you too."

"oh, are you good on cookies by the way?" Phill starting, "I don't know if you heard but the eggs need to take 8 cookies a week. I started collecting as many as I could so you're good for the week."

"Jesus, it's purgatory all over again." Cellbit joked

"Ah, sorry." Phill respond

Cellbit immediately noticed the tint of regret in Phil's eyes, he seemed to be defaulting to the purgatory mind set, Cell might of said it was concerning if he had found himself doing the same.

It wasn't suprising he was still in survival mode, especially when they didn't get the opportunity to have a proper set off, there was a huge difference between running to the boat to save your life and a proper bon fire goodbye.

"Um, speaking of purgatory, I just wanted to stop by and say maybe, if you're not busy we have a proper send off." Cellbit began.

"An send off?"

"A finally good bye to purgatory, I mean obviously we aren't gonna forgot it entirely but this will help us to move on."

Phill stared at him in disbelief before speaking again, "this was Roier's idea, wasn't it?"

Cellbit release a defeated sigh as he lost his confidence, "yes, it's not the best idea but it's a idea."

"I mean I like the idea, It just didn't seem like you."

Cellbit chuckled at Phill's respond, "no I'd like to ignore it all together, but Roier's seems convince, so I have to at least try."

"sure thing mate, when is it gonna be?"

"Midnight, why then?" Jaiden asked as she pet one of her many parrot birds.

"Purgatory had long nights, it'll fit the vibe." Cellbit explain

"Hmm, I don't see why not, where's not drinking tea right?" Jaiden inquired

"why you don't like tea anymore?" Cellbit asked

"God no, I hate tea now!" Foolish insisted.

charlie noted his head in agreement, "yeah no more tea, I will puke my guts out."

"great, it would help if you brought some food, but no pressure." Cellbit suggested

"ah, I'm not the best cook you know?" Etoiles warned

"I can make a mean milkshake!" Mouse added

"milkshake isn't a good night drink is it?" Etoiles asked

"doesn't matter, it's good."mouse double down

Cellbit chuckled at their ridiculous behavior, "well anyways, I'll see you guys tonight then."

It would be untrue to say Cellbit wasn't anxious about the upcoming event,but he was insistence on keeping a bold face for Roier whom saw through it rather easily."

"Pendjo, eres tan fácil de leer; you can just admit to be nervous?" Roier began

"What do I have to be nervous about?" Cellbit detour suddenly paying his attention to the food Roier brought with them.

"Hey come on now, this is supposed to be a night of openness!" Roier rebutted, "ya deberías saberlo mejor, ¡no te voy a juzgar!"

"Cellbit!" A voice called from his left, Cellbit would soon observe Etoiles approaching with Mouse by his side, Both holding milk products respectfully.

"I tired to stop her, but she instead on it." Etoiles inform as he passed off a large jug filled to the brim with a cold milkshake.

Cellbit released a nervous chuckle as he place the jug down, "well, the others aren't here but, feel free to chill by the fire."

"Hey, you got any music?" Mouse inquired

"I didn't prepare for..I think I might have a record in my backpack.." Cellbit pulled his backpack from under the table fumbling through it.

He eventually pulled a dic out that he handed off to mouse, whom immediately set it to play on her own backpack. The familiar tunes of pig step filled the air, as mouse dance her way over to fire.

It didn't take long for the others to show up, Charlie, jadien and foolish all in that order. Phil of course was the last one to show up, carry a dispenser jug of Ice Tea.

And with that his promise was broken, "Ah Phil, did you really have to bring tea?" Cellbit started

"Why not, its good!"

"Yes, but Foolish and Charlie, really didn't want to drink any-"

"Oh really?" Phil interrupted, "its a god damn send off they can drink the Tea, Foolish come drink this!" Phil demand as he poured foolish a cup.

"No, get that shit away from me!" Foolish begged

Cellbit chuckled at Phil's ridiculous behavior, then blended into the group forcing himself to socially per Roier's orders.

For the majority of the night it was mostly chill, in a not so suprising turn of events Cellbit found his desire to communicate to run dry in the first hour.

You could only do so much small talk before it becomes a drag, so he stayed by his partner, not necessarily saying anything but kept seated next to Him with his head rested on his shoulders, just Observering the other.

Therefore he couldn't help but notice that Phil of all people was acting rather strange and thus tuned into him and his conversations a lot more; which actually weren't that many since Phil spent most his time chugging tea at the dispenser.

The troubling part was, the driver was absolutely alcoholic, Cellbit certainly smelt the Vodka from here; granted he was fully aware Phil wasn't the one who spiked it but he surely figured out by now what was in it.

"Phil, come on stick fight?" Etoiles pleaded

Phil could feel his head spinning at the thought, but having turn him down the past few days he felt obligated to play along. He place the cup on the table, "yeah.. Ok." He agreed fetching a stick from his inventory

Etoiles was basically bouncing of the non existence walls in excitement, soon taking his stance in preparation as Phil did the same.

Cellbit would say he felt bad for watching, he knew without a shadow of a doubt Phil was about to eat shit, but lot like a car crash he just couldn't look away.

And eat shit Phil did, getting knocked down in less than ten seconds by the dullest part of Eotiles stick, but credit where credit was due, Phil clearly wasn't focus.

In fact Cell quickly track his vision to the others dancing, specifically Mouse, whom held a Goat's skull on her head. Phil would soon thank Etoiles for the fight then quickly made his way to mouse, stealing the skull then engaging in small talk.

"Where did you find this, I never see skulls this small just about." Phil was Cleary lying through his teeth, it seemed more like he just wanted an excuse not to give the item back.

Why not just ask to keep it?

"Phil, come on man, dance it's a party!" Charlie was obviously already drunk and while Phil was tispy enough to eat shit in under 10 seconds, Charlie was 'not gonna be able to piss straight' drunk.

So it made sense that he would just casually take the skull and start dancing about, however watching the way Phil's fingers curled in and his lips quiver, it pulled Cellbit to intervene.

He stole the skull from Charlie quickly hiding it in his inventory, satisfied to see a sense of peace wash over Phil. "You're going to poke someone's eye out." Cellbit warned.

"Ah man you're no fun." Charlie complained as he rejoin the group.

After everyone tired themselves out, Roier being the only one who brought actual food, started handing them out; as everyone was forced to sit and discuss by the fire it made the task a little easier.

"Phil, I noticed you don't tend to eat at these events." Cellbit inquiried

"Ah, I normally full up on toast before hand and so I usually just bring some back for Chayanne." Phil informed

"Please at least eat this time." Cellbit request as he past off the dish, "Roier might take it as an insult over wise."

"Yeah, sure mate."

After handing out everything Cell seated himself by the camp fire awaiting Roier's presence, though he find himself slightly annoyed by his husband's statements when he finally sat down.

"So guys, I was thinking right now would be a good opportunity to talk about how we've been feeling."

"Oh boy, here we go." Charlie started, "I don't have a problem ok?!"

"That's not at all what I was talking about." Roier corrected, "look I'm sure purgatory messed with our understanding of trust in our friendship! You don't have to say it, but its a known fact. "

"So?" Foolish asked, rather annoyed by the topic.

"So trust excuses come on, no seas una perra; you talk about your feelings I talk about mine, look I'll even go first!" Roier began, "When Cellbit stayed behind, I felt hurt that my feelings weren't concerned."

"Stop don't." Cellbit pleaded, his face already buried in his hands, "No es que no haya considerado tus sentimientos, solo hice lo que pensé que era mejor para ti."

"Exacto, lo hiciste sabiendo que me haría daño, simplemente porque querías hacer lo mejor para mí, lo entiendo."

"Stop this."

"Pero prefiero ser feliz a lo que es mejor para mí cualquier día, no seas idiota egoísta, te amo."

There was a long silence between the two, and though Cellbit looked ashamed, he also seemed partly content; Therefore it motivated others.

"Um, I'm actually really afraid all the time." Etoiles started

"Wait what?" Phil interrupted, "but you're Etoiles, you're always looking for a fight, being a hero."

"Well its more that I'm afraid of messing up, of not being enough; so of course I do a as many fights to prove to myself I'm strong but.. After it ends I feel pretty empty again."

once more a silence fell among the bon fire, it was clear tonight was expected to be an emotional one.

"sometimes I lose track of my motives." Jaiden began "of why I do the things I do and I've found myself asking, is motive a justification for the wrong I've done?"

Cellbit weight her words in his head, hateful of how strongly he agree with them, "I myself have done, regrettable things.. I knew my motive behind them but, I do wonder if the motive really is a justification.. I.. I don't know anymore."

Then the silence rare her uglyy face once more, the only sound the crackles of the fire. confession spoken would obviously be casted into the fire to burn but to leave their host and avoid becoming poison.

"I've been seeing things," Phil finally admit, "things I'm not sure are real anymore, and others can never seem to see it but.. I feel like I'm going crazy. I saw it, I lived thought it, it all feels real but.."

After the few who felt fit spoke their confession, there was an honor thirty minutes of silence to allow those confession to burn.

Freed from their host, freed from their minds. Once the event came to an end most participates rush their way home, and Phil was not above them

It was Cellbit, whom actually grabbed onto to Phil's shelve holding him back. "Um Phil, about those visions you've been seeing?"

"oh, no I mean, I was worried because I thought it was just because the kids were gone, but then it kept happening so..but it's fine it's probably all in my head." Phil dismissed

"in my experience, it never is." Cell warned, "at least reach out if it happens again."

".... Cellbit have you spelt?"

"wow.." Cellbit let his hands fall off Phil's shelve, "you're gonna turn on me like that!?"

"sleep deprivation is a terrible thing," Phil warned, "get some rest, for your own sake." Phil warned before turning away.

Momentarily Cellbit watch the older man walk away, keeping notice to check on Phil later.

#qsmp fanfiction #qsmp #q!philza #q!etoiles #q!charlie #q!jaiden #q!roier #q!mouse #q! Cellbit #The Healing Process #outdated fanfiction lol #but people wanted me to finish it #except more chapters #on Tumblr im not giving yall my a03 fuck that #also the Spanish bit are google translate im sorry #my first language isn't even English i don't know Spanish well

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alexiswritingstuff · 1 year

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Human.

Masterlist

Status: Complete.

Pairing: Castiel x gn! reader.

Other character appearances: Dean Winchester.

Summary: After getting his grace taken away from him, Castiel is left with being a human for the first time ever. The reader wants to prove to him that he’s not alone... Once they find him.

Warnings: mild angst, with some comfort dw.

Parts: one - two - three

A/n: I just binged the entirety of supernatural, and my brain is infatuated with yet another man. Cas deserves every bit of love, so I wanted to write for him, especially in season 9 because I can’t even imagine what it was like going through that.

I also wanna say that this is my first time writing for these characters, meaning that I might not be able to rightfully portray them in my pieces just yet, so bear with me please.

Either way, I really hope you enjoy... and let me know if you want a part 2.

It was some time early in the morning.

There were no windows in your room, due to being in a literal underground bunker, so all you had was an alarm clock to rely on for that information.

Though even if you had managed to catch the numbers that continuously flashed across the glass screen, it didn’t seem like your brain would process it.

You were wide awake. Any and all attempts at going back to sleep, or even to just shut your eyes, ended with nothing except getting right back to square one.

It was something that got old really fast. And now you found yourself sat at the edge of your bed, the cool air barely doing anything to soothe the warmth of your skin.

Every thought that swirled through your head felt like it only arrived to fight the previous one. To contradict it. Prove it wrong. Either way, it was just fuel to your bouncing leg that never seemed to cease.

There was a whole lot going on, and I mean a lot.

But to summarise at least the main things that had your brain freaked, to say the least, was that Sam's condition was only being improved by some angel that hid in his head... Which he also still doesn’t know about-- But that’s besides the point.

Oh, and another, totally minor, fact was that every other angel had been thrown out of heaven like shooting stars. Meaning that there were now hundreds of beings stuck in random parts of the country...

Including your friend.

From what you had heard, Castiel was now entirely human in an unknown destination.

I mean, you had clues from a call he had made once he found a pay phone, but whatever was happening on his end proved that he wasn’t going to be around there much longer.

You had to decide.

In an instant, your anxiety ridden body had pushed itself up from the bed beneath it.

Your knees felt like they were going to buckle as soon as you got to your feet, thinking on and on about how you would actually locate Cas, what you would say to him once he was found, what he would even be like after everything.

But in order to gain an answer to any of those questions...

You kind of needed to leave the bunker first.

And that meant getting past Dean. Giving him a really good excuse as to why you were more or less abandoning him to look after his brother while you looked for your... friend.

A sigh seeped through your lips. Each half of your body was devoted to either convincing you to stay, or leave. But after thinking about what Sam would do in a situation like this; where there was a person actually able to go and look for Cas, “Okay,”

You made your choice.

So, within the next five minutes, you had grabbed an emptied duffle bag, threw it on your bed and filled it with various things that you could only guess a new human would need.

Once there was a feeling of satisfaction when looking through the items inside, you simply zipped it up and swung it over your shoulder...

Admittedly, however, you did kind of stand there for a second. The worry of what the hell you were going to tell Dean, or how he would react, just overloading your mind, especially because of the recent circumstances.

But nevertheless, you managed to straightened yourself up, letting a very deep breath fill and empty your lungs, before finally making your way towards your bedroom door.

And only leaving once you had grabbed a wad of cash and shoved it into your pocket.

You made your way through the kitchen, placing the weighted duffle bag onto the smooth wooden table and unzipping it before moving towards the largest fridge compartment.

After opening the door, your body lowered a little. Your eyes scanned across each shelf, looking for anything that was easily portable and at least filling when consumed.

And soon, you ended up with arms full of sandwiches wrapped in Saran wrap, that you had made earlier, in case you actually did choose this option, and any drink close to water as apparently “You only needed the sink for that.”

“Y/n, hey, I, uh-- Whoa, what...”

Shit.

“What’s up with the bag? There a case I don’t know about?”

Your body tensed. The sound of the fridge door closing almost made you jump out of your skin as you anticipated the oncoming conversation.

I mean, it was gonna happen sooner or later.

With yet another deep breath, you turned around, tightening your hold on the food and drinks, and only spared the Winchester a simple glance before making your way back to the table. “Y/n?” The items practically spilled, one after the other, onto the wood when you got in front of it.

Dean remained still for a moment, his eyes following you as you organised stuff into groups, but as soon as he saw you reach for the duffle bag, “No.”

It clicked.

“Hey, no. No, no, no, no!”

Before your fingers could grasp onto the material, another hand seemed to beat you to it. And now it slid to the complete opposite side of the table. “I told you we would get to that, man. Right now--”

“Yeah, Dean, ‘getting to it’ is the problem.” you cut him off, meeting the man’s desperate eyes that almost made you regret that decision, “Look, I know you’re worried about Sam, okay? I am too-- Of course I am. But, I can’t... I can’t wait any longer.”

“I mean, Cas is a human, Dean, a human!” you continued, “He-- He can feel things like hunger and the need to sleep, and hell he’s going to need to piss at some point, if he hasn’t already, but... He’s never felt that before.”

“Any of it.”

“He has just been thrown into feeling things like we do, and... and instead of being right there with him, as he goes through all of this shit for the first time ever-- ever! We, his best friends, are just here.”

“In the bunker, all cosy with unlimited access to food, water-- Even a shower, while he is stuck in some random place, probably with no idea of where he is.”

Your heart was pounding in your chest. It felt like it was just gonna burst right out while you stared back at Dean.

But after every scenario you had imagined of him losing his shit, right then and there, once he would find you trying to leave...

He only sighed.

He took a mild step back, the breath still sifting through his lips, while he brought his hands up to his face and rubbed at the skin. An attempt to make sure that he wouldn’t say something he would regret. “I know... I know, Y/n, it just--”

Dean sighs again, “... I don’t know what to do.”

In that moment, all of your nervousness melted away. You had gotten so worked up about this whole thing that you forgot, at the end of the day, that he was your best friend.

You found yourself just standing there again, watching the man with furrowed eyebrows and softening facial muscles.

“Ezekiel... I don’t know-- I thought he would do more than this. At least faster, anyway, but...” Dean’s eyes sort of stared at nothing for a moment. Like he was searching through the air as if it would give him some sort of answer. And then he looked back at you, “I don’t know if I can’t keep lying to him, man.”

“I don’t know if I can keep lying to Sam.”

“Dean,” you began as soon as he had finished, and slowly moved forward until you were right in front of him. You placed a hand on his shoulder, “I know it’s a lot.” He snorted, “That’s an understatement.”

“Dean, you just... You need to make everything seem like it’s normal so that Ezekiel can do his work.” you insisted with nods of your head, “Look for a case, or something.”

“Do whatever you would do on any other day.” Your hand squeezed the shoulder it lay on, and Dean seemed to take in a calmer breath in response. “If it does, however, get too much or something then call me, all right? I just want to get Cas settled in-- That’s it.”

“I’ll be back before you know it.”

You stared at him for a moment. Waiting for at least some kind of signal while he took the time to think about what you said. And soon, you removed your hand from his shoulder after one final squeeze. Dean gave you a look with little nods of his head.

The bag you were trying to grab eariler slid back across the table. Back into the place it was before. And right as it got in front of you, the packing had began almost immediately.

You put all of the items in, maybe a little too fast, pressed it down a good few times. And while attempting to zip it up, Dean took the job of pulling the teeth together, so that you could actually close the damn thing.

“Okay,” you breathed out, swinging the bag that was increasingly heavier over your shoulder before turning to face Dean the moment it sat in a good position. He raised his head a little. “Let me know how Cas is then.”

His voice was a lot softer than it was before. A look of sincerity fighting its way through the panic in his eyes, despite his attempts to mask it.

“Of course.” you ensured with a few nods of your head. And Dean smiled.

It was short, which they always kind of were, as like every other time, before you could send him one yourself, he would change the subject.

For instance now he patted your back with a clear of his throat, looking through your eyes to see how badly you wanted to do this, before he simply turned.

Disappearing into the hallway.

~~~

The past few hours had felt like a wild goose chase.

You had gone from town to town, driving up and down every road numerous times, to search for this man. And you still had nothing.

No sign at all.

Eventually, after another clue you were following went cold, ending the same way as the last, a break was most definitely needed.

You found yourself in some convenience store. Being so consumed by the lack of your friend had caused you to forget about your own wellbeing. It hadn’t even struck in your mind until your stomach practically screamed at you to eat something.

So that’s what you did.

You laid out some bottles of water, food with actual nutrients in them and snacks that you wanted to see Cas try onto the counter before reaching for your wallet.

The cashier began putting the items in a few bags. And after paying, you took them, ignoring the ache that pulsed as soon as the weight got to your shoulders. “Thank you.”

With that, you were back outside, the sound of life engulfing your senses in a way that stopped your feet from moving any further.

Your eyes flickered back and forth between each street. You looked through the many people, that all seemed to walk in different ways, and the plethora of buildings that hugged the next.

“Where the hell are you, Cas.” A deep breath slowly filtered through your lungs, letting you take time to straighten yourself up.

An awarness of sweat suddenly grabbed your attention when the bags in your hands sort of slipped in response to the moisture. So, once you regained a strong grip. You turned. Making your way back down the street.

The familiar grumble however rumbled through your system, and though you were going to eat when back in the car, it seemed like your body was rather persistent.

You found yourself trying to maintain your balance. Juggling between keeping your hold on the bags and combing through your pockets for a Granola bar you had put in there for later. “Come on, man, where is--”

A sudden sound clattered through the busy air.

In that moment, your feet seemed to halt once again. Your eyebrows were furrowed, eyes flickering through the oncoming faces to see if anyone else had heard it...

But, somehow, No one had.

The bar you were looking for was now between your teeth, as you had finally found it. And once you convinced yourself that it was just your imagination, you divided the bags you held between each hand.

Though, right as you were about to take a step-

BANG.

There it was again.

“What the... What the hell?” You spun round, letting your confused eyes scan through the street you had just walked down to figure out what was going on.

And that was when your gaze landed on an alleyway.

You sort of stared at it for a moment. Weighing out all of the outcomes that checking it would have. However, your body reacted before your brain did as you started to backtrack.

Every part of your face was riddled with confusion and curiosity, which further increased when you actually got a glimpse of what was around the corner.

I mean, it was just an alleyway. But a blue jacket seemed to draw your attention from the surrounding bland colours, and your gaze soon landing on what appeared to be a man.

The longer that you looked at him, the more you took in what was around him. Which in fact lead you to realise that he was positioned in front of a bin, that loud sound being him discarding the lid so that he could actually look inside.

Immediately, your body retracted. Guilt flooded through your veins at the fact that you just stared at a random person trying to find food, because that was none of your business...

But before your eyes could follow the movements of the rest of your body, the man moved his head in a way that showed off his side profile.

And now you halted once again.

That face. The structure.

You could never forget it.

“Cas?”

The man before you, who had just grabbed onto the rim of the bin, twisted his head round so fast that when your eyes actually met, all the air in your lungs felt like it had disappeared.

“... Y/n?”

His voice.

That was his voice. A sound that ended up jumpstarting your brain as the bar dropped from your mouth. Forgotten.

You couldn’t look away from him while you moved further into the alleyway. An action that meant the nearer you got, the more you could see his face and the roughness that came with it.

There were prominent bags underneath those unforgettable eyes. Various patches of dirt littered across any part of skin that was on display, and he even had stubble sprouting across the lower part of his face.

It was a look that you never expected to see.

As soon as you got close enough, the bags in your hands fell to the floor one after the other. Your eyes wondered from his face to the, actually different, clothes worn on his body, and then back up again.

It was the man that pulled your best friend out of hell, the man who went through purgatory with you-- The person you had been trying to find for days on end with nothing but failure in return.

It was Castiel.

You pulled him into your arms so suddenly that you didn’t even realise it had been done until your chin was rested on top of his shoulder. He was real.

“What are you doing here?” His voice purely rumbled through your ears, but due to the longing of wanting to hear it in the first place, you didn’t move. A chuckle even fleated your lips at the feeling of his life underneath your fingertips.

Cas was lightly patting your back in response.

It was hesitant. Either because he didn’t know what to do, or it was because of the fact that he truly couldn’t believe that you were right there. That he could feel you.

Before he could figure it out, though, you pulled yourself back in a way that let your eyes fully take in the features of his face. Not daring to actually let him go.

“How did you find me?” Cas questioned instead, letting himself do the same thing until they began to flicker behind, scanning over where you had just come from, “Where’s Sam and Dean.”

The query had you stifling another laugh. An action that seemed to bring Castiel’s attention back to you, and soon that familiar expression of confusion tugged at his features. “What?”

“Am I not good enough for you?” you joked, leaning back a little to get a good view of that face. Apparently that signalled something else, however, and Cas’s head sort of lowered, his eyebrows knitting together even more. If that was even possible. “You know I would never think that.”

“Oh... No, Cas, I know that! I know! I just-- Forget it.” you insisted with a shake of your head, finally letting him go so that you could collect the bags that were previously left on the ground.

“Let’s get you sorted then, huh?”

Once they were all rounded up, you had twisted your body so that you could further signal to him that it was time to go. More so that you wanted to get back in your car and actually eat something...

But he never moved.

He was just stood there. Staring. His eyebrows twitching in a way that made your head mildly tilt to the side, “What are you waiting for?”

When the sound finally seemed to reach his ears, his body straightened up within a second. The taut, almost anxious, look on his face eased away. And that’s when he finally began to move.

“Come on.”

The door swung in with ease, and you walked in without a second to waste, carrying all the bags, including the duffle bag, despite Cas’s persistent protests, “All right, so,”

“I booked this place for a few days,” you begun through a strained voice, placing the array of plastic bags on the little table by the window, “It should be enough, but I can pay for longer if needed.”

You rounded up all of the stuff that needed to be refrigerated first and moved to do exactly that with the mini fridge, these rooms always seemed to have, by the sink.

It was only on the way back to the other items, however, that you realised Cas hadn’t responded to your words. Or even spoken at all since you got out of the car.

“You alright?” you questioned, though your back was now turned, and lifted the duffle bag from your shoulder. The lack of weight had you stifling the urge to let out a huff of relief before you placed the bag beside the rest of the food.

Cas was stood practically in the centre of the room. His eyes scanned across the patterns of the wallpaper, the carpet that had probably been walked on a thousand times, the door to the bathroom.

And then he turned again, looking at the bed he stood at the end of.

The singular bed.

“You’re not taking me back to the bunker,” His voice was lighter than usual, almost as if it didn’t want to come out at first. The range of deepness was still there however. One that seemed to make your body freeze whenever it boomed through your ears, “Are you?”

It took you a few seconds to do anything as your mind battled with multiple thoughts.

You wanted to say so many things. Apologise for so many things. But the idea that whatever came out of your mouth could possibly hurt him, in any way... You would rather say nothing at all.

And that’s exactly what you did.

Your fingers fumbled for the duffle bag in an attempt to distract yourself as much as possible, which proved hard, especially when unzipping the thing, due to the fact that any sound produced seemed to echo through the room.

You cleared your throat, beginning to take out any of the items that needed to go in the bathroom or in drawers--

“Y/n.”

The urge to sigh was immediate, but you stifled it just as fast.

The last thing you wanted was to make him feel worse than he probably already did. So, instead, you closed your eyes. Trying to collect yourself as much as possible before there was any sort of reaction.

“Cas,” you managed out after a moment. And after a subtle, quick, shake of your head, you finally twisted yourself round to face the man who hadn’t even moved an inch.

Those eyes.

Those beautiful-- I mean, blue eyes of his stared back in a way that was almost as if he was glimpsing into your soul. He was reading into absolutely any movement you made, and any look that showed on your face, even for a split second, like his life depended on it.

“Look,”

You slowly started to make your way towards the man who continued to watch your every move. Uncertain to even blink, as if you would just disappear when he opened his eyes again.

Instead, however, you were now standing right in front of him.

“I didn’t, uh… I didn’t really plan what I was going to do, or say, when this moment came.” You spoke slowly. A sort of hesitance becoming more and more apparent with every word… And soon the new human wasn’t the only one staring.

You gulped. “Cas... The angels.” His entire demeanour visibly shrunk. “I just… It’s going to make me sound like an asshole, and you have every right to be mad at us-- at me, but--”

“No,” Castiel suddenly stated, “No, I understand.”

Your eyes were narrowed. “You... You do?” That same confusion from earlier filled your veins, and did so even more when Cas simply nodded his head. “You want to protect.”

His voice was louder this time. And when he moved towards the singular bed, letting his hand closest graze across the sheets, your gaze could only follow, “Keep them away from danger,” he added on, slowly lowering himself to sit on the mattress, “It’s... understandable.”

Your heart ached. The sight of him; the way his eyes glazed, the way he sat, his voice. He looked so…drained. It hurt you to see it, but you couldn’t even begin imagine what he was feeling.

“Oh, Cas.”

A deep breath seeped into your lungs, and you moved in the next second before your brain could decide if it actually was a good idea.

And now here you were. Standing in front of the man, you had so desperately wanted to see for weeks on end, in a way that meant he had to lift his head to see your face.

The two of you stared at each other for a moment in a silence that didn’t seem to be uncomfortable. You took in each other’s presence, the disbelief from earlier finally beginning to dissapate as you stared into those ocean like eyes.

There was a multitude of things that seemed to swirl within them, and after realising that they had captivated you, a little too much, you remembered the sort of conversation you were having.

A sigh eventually made its way between your lips, and you began to lower yourself down until you were crouched before him. “It’s just for now… Okay?”

Your eyes never left his as an attempt to show your assurance. And to further prove yourself, you grabbed one of his hands. Having to hide your shock at how cold it was in your grasp, “I care about you too, Cas.”

“You know that right?”

That was the thing that finally seemed to gain a reaction.

His expression shifted in a way that was similar to earlier. Every feature across his face let go of the tension and taking its place was a sort of... soft look.

“Right?” you questioned again when there was no verbal response, and even lightly shook the hand you held onto as if it would make him speak.

Instead, Cas tore his eyes away from your own, a sort of timidness taking over his demeanour.

He was only able to lowly hum in acknowledgment to your words, and even when he nodded his head to show further understanding, it was a movement you almost didn’t see. A movement that seemed to flick a switch in your brain.

You began to think about what would happen when you left.

What would he do? What would he think about? Did he even know how a shower works?

I mean, yes, he was a grown, million year old, man. He also can sure as hell take care of himself, he has proved so many times. But he had just gone through failure after failure.

He had watched his brothers and sisters get thrown out of their home. And now they were coming after him. Wanting to kill, torture and who knows what else.

Castiel could handle himself, sure. But thinking about what he would do, or in fact not do, when those angels eventually found him... It had you sick to your stomach in an instant.

So, after staring at his tired face some more. After realising that this man had probably never had a day of comfort, of calmness. You finally had an answer to the question you had been asking yourself since the beginning of the search for Cas.

“Which is exactly why I’m going to stay with you.”

#castiel #castiel x reader #castiel supernatural #castiel spn #castiel novak #castiel novak x reader #gender neutral reader #supernatural #supernatural x reader #supernatural x gender neutral reader #supernatural fanfic #spn #dean winchester

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n0v4t33z · 8 months

Text

The Syndicate - Chapter 6 : Un-Killable

Pairings: Choi San X Female Reader, Park Seonghwa X Female Reader, Ateez X Female Reader

Genre: Lots of angst, Romance, Crime Fiction, Psychological Drama

Word Count: 5.8k

Tags/Warnings: For Mature Audiences, Language, Graphic Violence, Mentions of Illegal activities (i.e Kidnapping, extortion, assassination etc.), y/n gets roughed up by Wooyoung like twice , Slow Burn, Fluff sometimes, Work In Progress, Non-Idol AU, Mafia AU, Very suggestive at times, y/n cries alot, y/n having inner turmoil, Ateez being bad boys, Wooyoung and Yeosang are a little mean in this story tbh, Guns, Gunshot wounds, Assassination attempt(s), mentions death and acts of violence

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

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Author's Note 💌: Hi, It's been about two weeks since I posted the last chapter so I'm here to keep my promise about posting at least twice every month! Unfortunately I didn't realize how short this chapter actually is. Either way it's a good one though, there are also some parts I may fix and add onto later since I'm posting this close to 2 am and I'm exhausted so I hope you guys still enjoy it either way! ^^

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A whole 2 months passes by and I notice San has become somewhat distant and has been spending most of the time either in his office by himself or in the conference room with the rest of the guys. Although Seonghwa, Jongho, Yunho and Mingi still interact with me they become very vague anytime I ask them about San. There were a few occasions where I wanted to try and see what exactly they were talking about but because there's always a goon outside the door now keeping a lookout so I could never get close enough to hear. One day I asked Seonghwa why they spent so much time in the conference room and the only thing he told me is "We're sorting things out." As for me, this whole time after I ran the 3 people’s names in the police database and nothing came up I realized these people are basically ghosts with no paper trails on the database meaning I’ve been having to investigate on foot and tailing them. The only thing San left for me as a place of reference and a place to start was a club on the east side of the city which actually turned out to be a club named "Enigma" that they own under a fake identity but another thing San left on the note is that these 3 people are brothers who run an underground black market out of it. So far everything is fine with them, no meetings with any other rival groups. If anything, these brothers definitely know how to treat their allies by providing them with weapons and other resources that are otherwise considered inaccessible to which I'm assuming this is the reason San wants to work with them. Which leads me to where I am right now, heading home after a long couple of days of consecutively tailing and observing these people. What's been really weird is that San called me at least once everyday to check in on me in the beginning but it's been 2 weeks and nothing. I sigh while I look at the dark road ahead of me, taking in the scene of complete emptiness with a beautifully glittery night sky which left me feeling a bit emotional. I slowly begin to tighten my grip on the steering wheel. I’ve had so many chances to leave but why aren’t I taking them? Have I seriously grown attached?

I reach for my phone and very anxiously I glance at the screen while I keep my eyes on the road and look at my recent calls, the last time I called San was two days ago. I stare at his name on my screen for a few seconds and decide to just hit the call button. The ringing starts and by the 4th ring I'm sent to voicemail immediately making my heart sink. He didn't answer, again. My vision begins to blur the bright headlights and the road ahead of me slightly begins to distort until warm tears stream down my cheeks then I let out a small sigh “Why? What did you do to me?” Why do I have to make things more difficult for myself? The original plan was to have San trust me enough to let me leave his headquarters, but now that he's given me that permission I can't seem to leave. Why?

I try to compose myself and wipe my tears away with one hand while I keep my other hand on the steering wheel. In the distance I see the headquarters, and realize that most of the drive home I spent it worrying about him and questioning myself. When I arrive I walk inside headquarters I notice it seems empty, and by empty I mean too quiet. There's almost always someone in the building, whether it's Seonghwa drinking his tea in the lounge, Hongjoong on his computer in the server room, Wooyoung playing cards with Mingi, Yeosang and Yunho in the living room, even Jongho's occasional little breaks after he's been working all afternoon. So when I walk over to the lounge and notice it's completely empty my stomach feels like it flipped upside down. Where is everyone? I walk around the building and no one was there except of course the goons who keep watch on the building 24/7 now so I decide I'm going to just ask one of them as to why it's so empty because this is weird.

There’s a very tall and heavy build goon outside of San's office, he was so scary looking. Although his suit made him look a little less scary. "Um excuse me but where is everyone? Why is it so empty here?" Without flinching the man simply responds with "They're sorting out a few things they'll be back soon Miss y/n." I exhale then I run my fingers through my loosely curled hair "Okay yes, but where are they? What are they doing?" Keeping a straight face without even looking at me he responds "I'm sorry Miss y/n but that's all I know." I narrow my eyes in disbelief. Does he really think I’m that stupid? "That can't be, you have to know where they are. You were given orders by San not to tell me anything weren't you?" The man stands there looking straight ahead pretending he didn't hear me. I look at him for a few seconds more waiting if he'll say anything but he never does then I clench my jaw and say through my teeth "Fine, I'll take that as a yes." I scoff and walk away to my room, when I get there I throw myself onto my bed. I lay there in bed for a few minutes until I fall asleep.

A few hours later I hear commotion downstairs, it was San and the guys. ”I’m exhausted. Now all we need is to kill that old bastard.” Wooyoung comments. ”Well at least we’re done now, I thought it was going to take a lot longer to pull this off.” Hongjoong responds. I look over at the clock and it was around 4 am then I get up and hurriedly head downstairs and notice they’re all dressed in black like they were in a robbery of some sort. All the talking stops and becomes dead silent when everyone notices I’m in the room then Seonghwa walks towards me and nervously smiles “Hey, what are you doing here? Weren’t you on an errand?” I shrug with a straight face “I just got back a few hours ago, what about you guys? Why’s everyone dressed like this? Did I miss something?” San walks up to me and pats my back and smiles “Nothing, we just went to go handle something don’t worry about it.” I furrow my brows and look directly into San’s eyes “Let me guess you still went even after I told you not to…” San shakes his head and reassuringly pats my head “Didn’t we agree to forget about this? I said I wasn’t going to..” Seonghwa, MIngi, and Yunho look over at San with a very odd facial expression then Wooyoung says “You have your jobs and we have ours. San’s allowed to do what he wants it’s not like you’re his girlfriend.” I slowly nod and give Wooyoung and San a fake smile “Of course, you’re right. I was just wondering considering I've barely seen any of you at all I was just a bit worried.” Yeosang stares right at me with a deadpan face “Why do you even care? It’s not like we’re your friends.” Gosh, I know he’s right but wow that hurt. San's expression grows dark and Seonghwa puts his hand on Yeosang’s shoulder causing him to ease up a bit then I let out a frustrated sigh. Here we go again. “Well, maybe you might not be my friend but if you haven’t noticed there are other people I am friends with.” Wooyoung lets out a mocking laugh “Oh really? They’re your friends? If they were your friends they would have told you what was going on but clearly no one trusts you. You’ve only been here like what? 3 or 4 months and you already want to be let in on everything we do? Sounds just about right for an entitled cop.” San pushes Wooyoung and angrily says “Can you ever shut up?!” Yunho and Jongho rush over to separate them, Yunho holding San and Jongho holds Wooyoung respectively. As much as I’d love to be petty with Wooyoung and drop the bomb on San that his best friend thought it was a great idea to nearly kill me, I’ll keep that to myself. All in due time I guess. I don’t want to create anymore issues for these people. I bite the inside of my cheek trying to recover from that verbal jab. This is embarrassing, maybe Wooyoung is right they do have a right for not trusting me. Just because I gave them access to all these things doesn’t mean anything, for all they know I could be leading them to a trap so I don’t blame them for not trusting me. San angrily stares at Wooyoung "Oh come on San, calm down. I was just expressing everything in everyone's mind." Wooyoung fights back a smirk and San tries to reach over to him causing Yunho to tighten his grip on him.

"You don't speak for everyone here." Seonghwa speaks up looking directly at me reassuringly. Jongho speaks from behind Wooyoung "I agree with San and Seonghwa. You really don't speak for everyone here." Hongjoong sighs and nods "She's not so bad Wooyoung. You know this. You're just being hard headed and paranoid over this situation not to mention overtly territorial over San." Wooyoung lets out a laugh "Me paranoid?! Territorrial?! I know what these cops are capable of doing?! Did you guys forget what happened to San's father?! They easily get into your head and mess with it, they're master manipulators just like Lee. She's just like him and I'm only trying to protect him from things repeating themselves." There's a long silence, evreyone awkwardly looking at eachother. That's when I step in between San and Wooyoung causing evreyone's gaze to shift over to me. I slightly part my lips to speak but then a knot grows in my throat and press them shut. Maybe it's a good idea not to say anything right now and keep the peace. All this fighting isn't going to be worth it in the end. I can't change someone's mind whose already been made. Wooyoung can think anything he wants, I just don't want to hear it anymore. I turn my back to them and walk in the direction of my room.

In the distance I hear Yunho say “Come back just give her some time alone.” followed by fast paced footsteps until a few moments later I feel someone grab my wrist then I look back and it was San. He gently tugs my arm closer to him and I look down still slightly embarrassed for running off in a cowardly way. “y/n, wait… I’m sorry some of them haven’t warmed up to you but I promise it’s not your fault. I know you were just worried.” Beginning to feel drained I shake my head “I’m exhausted, we can talk tomorrow. Right now I just want to be alone.” San gently pushes back a few strands of hair “I understand, but please pay no attention to them especially Wooyoung. Nothing he says has an ounce of truth. I need you here with me, remember that.” I let go of San’s hand and walk towards my room leaving him behind me. When I walk into my room I lay there silently for a few moments until warm tears begin to sting my eyes. Once I get rid of Captain Lee I’m going to leave this place despite how deeply in love I am, or at least try to. I can’t keep putting myself through this.

The next morning while laying in bed I hear Wooyoung shouting in a panicked voice from outside in the hallway “San, they took down all security!” I sit up and quickly change clothes while listening closely to the commotion in the hallways, from what it sounds like someone took down the people guarding the HQ gates which is still kind of far considering we’re in the middle of nowhere. Suddenly San barges into my room with a slightly worried expression and says “y/n, the cops are on their way as we speak. Burn everything you can, everything on your computer wipe it and burn it too.” He hands me a gasoline can and some matches and pats my head “Everything will be okay I promise.” He smiles nervously and before he can walk away I pull on the sleeve of his rolled up dress shirt “Why are the cops coming? Is it because of what you guys were doing earlier today?” San’s smile disappears into a straight line and a serious expression then he runs his fingers through his hair “Please don’t get mad, I know you said you didn’t want me to follow through with breaking into the evidence room but I went ahead and did it anyway. I’m sorry. I genuinely thought everything went well I swear I made sure no one followed us but I guess I was wrong.”

I clench my free hand to the point my knuckles turn white. The silence between us lasted as a long instant, and while the anger welled up in my chest. He was looking at me with his gaze of expectation for me to simply forgive him and move on but as of right now I can’t. I won't. Instead it pisses me off because it seems like everything I tell him Is being ignored. Everything that’s happening right now was because of him but what do I expect from a criminal anyway? If anything I shouldn’t even be surprised, I should have known he was going to pull something like this. I raise my hand back and throw my hand forward as hard as I can, whipping it across his face. The crack of skin contacting skin echoed off the metal walls of my room. His face then turns back to me while he slowly runs his hand along his cheek and without another word I walk away. Part of me knows and is well aware I’m running away from my problems but at the moment I was more focused on escaping the police and wiping the computer of any evidence, I can’t get caught now. Nobody can find out I was kept alive.

I run into my work room and over to the computer and begin trying to reimage it to delete all the data on the hard drive then the screen shows a percentage bar and on the bottom of it read “Time Remaining: 35 minutes” I rub my forehead in frustration and grab the tower of the computer, toss it across the room a few times until it eventually splits open then I grab the can of gasoline and pour most of it on the motherboard and the hard drive. I pull out a match from the match box in my pocket and light it then flick it directly inside the computer case immediately igniting a huge fire. After burning a few papers and files I head down the hallway and I notice Yeosang looking out the window and calmly loading his gun while gazing into the distance then I realize he was looking at the various police cars, a helicopter and a few SWAT vehicles getting in position. Someone taps my shoulder and when I turn it was Mingi, he hands me a gun and says “Good luck” I nod taking the gun making sure there was ammo “Same to you.” Out of seemingly nowhere Yeosang begins to shoot causing me to slightly jump. San immediately runs out of his office with a gun in hand then he grabs my hand and leads me downstairs towards the back exit. “We’re going to head outside, there’s a secret escape route I built in the forest so I hope you have your walking shoes on because it’s going to be a long walk.” While he opens the door I say “Where’s everyone else?” He peaks outside and says “Mingi and Yeosang are going to buy us time. Everyone else is already in the forest.” Suddenly Wooyoung runs up behind us and pats San’s shoulder. “Everything is clear, lower associates were sent to distract the feds.” San nods and says “Did you turn on the self destruct device in the server room?” Wooyoung nods and smirks “Yep, everything is in order.” He steps outside in front of San and hides behind a car outside then motions us to follow behind him and just a few seconds after giving us the signal he motions us to stop and stay low. Then I hear a familiar voice.

“Let the girl go Choi San…” My stomach drops and I look up and see that In the helicopter was my partner Detective Chris and Captain Lee looking over his shoulder and right next to them was a sniper. I tightly squeeze his hand and San turns and looks at me “You’ll be okay, worst case is they’ll shoot me and not you.” Captain Lee speaks into the mega phone and says “Give it up son, you lost and it was all because you’re so reckless. You got so sloppy but don’t worry though I’ll clean the mess you left and I’ll start by shooting your little friend over here.” The red laser from the sniper’s gun points right at Wooyoung’s head “And then you.” Wooyoung looks at San and slightly nods and begins to run towards the forest. Almost instantly he gets shot in the chest instead from the sudden movement. His body falls limply on his side while he clutches onto his chest and struggles to breathe. My stomach drops and San lets out a scream calling out Wooyoung’s name with tears welling up in his eyes in anger “I’m going to kill you bastard!!” I clutch onto San's arm holding the gun in my other hand tightly with my eyes blurring with tears. Captain Lee smirks “You know what, I take it back. I won’t shoot you that’s letting you off easy...I want you to suffer by watching all your little mobster trash die.”

Seeing Wooyoung on the ground didn’t bring me satisfaction, instead I begin to cry at the sight of his breathing slowing down. Despite everything he’s done to me I couldn’t let San suffer again, as angry and pissed off as I am with him right now for putting us in this situation he doesn’t deserve to lose his bestfriend. Wooyoung needed help and fast but the only way to get him that help is if I turn myself in and somehow convince them to step back. I hate the idea that I won't have that anonymity anymore but this is a matter of life or death. If I can prevent someone from dying then I'm sure it'll be worth it no matter how painful it is. Suddenly, an idea pops up in my head, it was one I really didn't want to do but my only hope is that it all goes smoothly. I step in front of San with my back facing the helicopter which causes San to pull me closer to him into a hug. i gently press the barrel of the gun I have onto his stomach and he leans in close to my ear and whispers “What are you doing angel eyes? Whatever is going on in that little head of yours just stop, I don’t want you to get hurt. Please.” He sniffles burying his face in my hair trying to hide the fact that he was slightly teary eyed “Sannie, do you trust me?” He talks into my neck “Yes of course I trust you.” Staying still and keeping my voice calm I say “Keep your head down and shoot the sniper.” His voice goes an octave higher while keeping his head down buried into my neck and says “What?! Why?!” Keeping my calm I press the gun a little more onto his stomach “Do it. Shoot the sniper, trust me.” From the corner of my eye I see San’s arm go up and shoot in the sniper’s direction and as soon as he shoots I move just a bit to where the sniper’s bullet hits my right shoulder. I let out a scream in agonizing pain from the impact of the hot metal burning deep in my shoulder causes me to slightly jerk forward and drop the gun in my hand. I push San with the strength from the adrenaline coursing through my veins back into the building and I run towards the helicopter while I clutch onto my shoulder with tears in my eyes. This was all for nothing, so much for getting rid of this man from the shadows.

“There’s a bomb in there! Please Captain Lee, Chris we have to get out of here and remove everyone from the perimeter!” I look back and see San was no longer in the doorway, both Chris and Captain Lee look at me in awe then look at each other a few seconds. Eventually Chris lets down a ladder, helps me climb up and sit down. He sits next to me and looks over at Captain Lee “Captain, we have to take her to the hospital now!” I lay there growing more exhausted by the second due to blood loss until I manage to mutter “Captain, remove everyone from this perimeter now or we’re all going to die.” Chris looks at me and shakes his head while he keeps pressure on my wound “No, we can’t. We have a warrant for San’s arrest we can’t just let him escape” I grab Chris’s forearm and squeeze it from the pain and slight impatience “Trust me, I know he’s going to fuck up again this won’t be the last time. The bomb, please. We have to get out of here we don’t have much time left..” Chris turns to Captain Lee giving him a worried look then Captain Lee looks down at the building for a few moments that felt like an eternity and eventually looks over at me and Chris “Alright, but only because I trust Detective y/ln and know she’ll be able to catch this scum again.” He looks over at the pilot and says “Take us to the nearest hospital please.”

He speaks into his radio “We’ve got a code 4, change of plans, we found Detective y/n y/ln alive and well. Clear the area, over.” Is he really going to act like he didn’t leave me for dead? Is this a favor that later on he’s going to try to use as leverage to somehow blackmail me? A voice answers back on the radio “Disregarding, all units will return back to the station. Over.” I did it, but this was too easy… Luckily the server room self distructing came in handy so technically I wasn’t lying. Chri’s voice interrupts my thoughts and says “So you’re alive? I’m so glad you’re okay but how? I saw your dead body, how is that possible?” I struggle to breathe then I sit there focusing on my breaths until Captain Lee sits next to the seat where Chris and I were sitting and says “Detective Bang stop asking her questions, can’t you see she has a bullet inside her?” Chris’s voice slightly shakes a bit and says “I’m sorry sir, I’m just in shock she’s alive. I saw her charred body, her police badge, everything." I feel my eyes slowly begin to close, my consciousness felt like it was slipping away until everything goes dark.

When I wake up, I scan the room and realize I'm at the hospital. That’s when it all comes back to me, I hope San is okay and he managed to escape along with everyone else. Especially Wooyoung, I really hope he made it as well. I turn and notice Chris is asleep then In a low whisper I say “Chris?” Immediately I see Chris sit up and say “Oh hey y/ln you’re up, how are you feeling?” I nod my head slightly and look down at the IV needle in my hand while he proceeds to talk “I’m so glad it wasn't anything serious, I waited for you to wake up and ask if you wanted to see your family. I’m sure you miss them. I didn’t call them right away since I didn’t want you to be overwhelmed.” I shake my head and I say in a low voice “Don’t tell them I’m alive... Please.” Chris furrows his brows and gives me an odd look “Why not?” I stare off into the distance trying not to make eye contact with him “Promise me you won’t tell anyone especially Captain Lee.”

Chris leans in close to me then I lean in a bit more and whisper “I’m going to run away. I think it’s best for me to disappear considering AS is going after me and I don’t want my family to get killed.” I still can’t believe I’m lying through my teeth, who am I trying to save? San or me? Maybe both. Chris responds in a worried tone “It’s okay we can get you into the Witness Protection Program., you can get your life back.” I sigh and shake my head “No Chris, I’m doing this without the help of the government or the police.” Chris’s jaw tenses up and sits there looking at the ground for a few seconds. “Please, don’t tell anyone Chris. Promise me. You also have to make sure Captain Lee doesn’t release the news of me being alive to the media as this is going to make it even harder for me.” He lifts his gaze and meets my eyes and smiles “Of course I promise, we’re partners after all. We’re under oath to protect one another but promise, you’ll reach out to me occasionally. I just want to make sure you’re alive and well.” I nod then I sit up “Of course as long as you keep my existence a secret, but I do have one more thing to tell you and this one is much more serious because it’s about Captain Lee.” I hope he doesn’t tell him, but who else can I trust? Besides having someone to lean on he might be of help. He scrunches his face in curiosity then looks at the door “What about him? Is it something bad?” I bite the inside of my lip then I take a deep breath and blurt out “Captain Lee works for The Obsidian Dragon, Aurora Syndicate’s rival. I know this because I saw a whole file documenting him being associated with the mafia with pictures and everything.” Chris smirks holding in a small laugh “What? Are you sure that’s not the morphine talking? Why would he even work for the mafia to begin with?” Oh no, he’s asking questions. “He was a close friend of the Choi family, specifically The Phantom. He’s the reason that the whole shootout happened, he sold The Phantom’s location in exchange for money.” Chris’ hand reaches up to his mouth then says “Wait what? So he knew who was behind all of that? No wonder he would always breathe down our necks and constantly check the leads. How much was he given?” I tap my finger on my chin “50 grand if I remember correctly.” He blinks in shock then says “Okay wow that’s quite a bit of money. Yeah, I get why you’re in a hurry to hide. You know too much.” And I know so much more but I can’t tell you the rest.

“Yep..” There was a long silence but Chris clears his throat and says “So uh I have a question and it’s kind of random...Why was San holding you like that?” I raise my eyebrow “How so? What do you mean?” He rests his cheek on his hand “You know like weirdly close, like he had a thing for you. His hand around your waist.” I shrug and look out the window “I don’t know, maybe because he thought of me as an object more than a person. His meat shield.” Hopefully by telling him everything he wants to hear it’ll help me get him off my back, even if those said answers aren’t how I truly feel at all. He can’t find out I’m protecting San. From the corner of my eye I see Chris’s eyes move from looking at the door back to me “Did he ever do anything to you?” While looking out the window I run my finger along the IV tube “I don’t know I was drugged the majority of the time I was there, I can’t remember anything.” Chris puts his head down and rubs his forehead while gently tapping his foot on the floor “I swear to god y/n if he did anything to you…” I shake my head “Nah, despite how scary he is he never put his hands on me.” He raises an eyebrow “How do you know? You were drugged the whole time..” I look down at the dusty pink blanket on my body “Because he was the one who would make the beatings stop, besides I’m sure if he did anything to me my body would remember it. Instead I just remember that evreytime I was being beat he’d scold the person doing it.” That feeling, that pit in my stomach. My eyes well up with tears and Chris reaches for my hand “I’m sorry, I can’t talk about this. Just remembering it brings it all back” Chris nods giving me a reassuring hand squeeze “I’m sorry, we don’t have to talk about it anymore. You should rest, we'll talk about it later when you feel better.” He adjusts my pillow slightly so that I'm able to lay back a little bit again. "Thanks Chris, you should nap too. You look exhausted." He gives me a weak smile "I should be watching you. It's okay." I shake my head "I insist, it's kind of weird knowing you're just watching me sleep. A nap will most definitely not hurt you." He looks into the distance and slowly nods his head almost like he was thinking whether or not he should do it "Alright, if that makes you comfortable y/ln, just know if I hear the door open I will wake up.." I chuckle nervously "Yeah, I know" I hope he falls into a deep sleep otherwise I'm screwed.

A few hours later I wait until Chris is fast asleep in his seat then I begin taking the tubes and IV’s off of me and I put on my pants and shoes making sure I also take the phone San gave me. I look over and glance over at chris to make sure he was still asleep then I carefully open the door wide enough for me to slip out the hospital. Luckily because of the lack of use my phone still had battery so I enter a gas station restroom near the hospital and call San. I anxiously hold the phone to my ear while it rang a few times then on the other line San answers the phone and excitedly I say “San?!” In a surprised tone he answers “y/n?! Where are you? Are you okay?” Relieved to hear his voice again I say in a slight hushed tone “I’m at the gas station bathroom a few blocks from the hospital, I escaped but um what about Wooyoung, is he okay?” I anxiously brush my index finger over the smooth surface of the back of the phone while I wait for him to answer. “He’s fine now angel eyes. He got a pierced lung but he’ll be okay don’t worry.” I let out a sigh of relief and smile “I’m glad he’s okay. I’m glad your best friend is still here with you.” He exhales a bit before he admiringly says “He wouldn’t have been saved if it wasn’t for you and your quick thinking, I don’t know how you did it but I’m so thankful.” There’s a long silence then he continues “ Do you want me to send someone to pick you up?” Immediately I respond “Yes please, I want to get out of here before anyone notices I’m gone” San answers me reassuringly “Don’t worry I’ll send your location to the nearest Associate just hang tight okay? Their code word will be “snow”, I’ll see you in a bit angel eyes I love you.” I gently bite my lip " I love you too. Sannie” I hear San chuckle on the other side of the line and immediately after the line goes dead. I turn and see myself in the mirror and realize I was wearing my ugly hospital gown so I decide to turn it inside out and make a makeshift tie up shirt out of it.. After I finish I sit on the counter of the bathroom and not even 10 minutes later there’s a knock at the door. I stay silent until a deep voice says “Snow.” I jump off the counter and run to open the door and see an average build man with a buzz cut and tattoos and a dark blue track suit “y/n ?” I nod then he motions me to walk behind him and says “Come on, the boss asked me to take you where they’re in hiding.” I nod and follow him into a black average looking car with dark tinted windows, his car reeked of cigarettes and the seats were pretty worn out, a nice way to blend in. Smart.

After 2 hours of driving we arrive at a parking lot at an undisclosed area since I couldn't tell where exactly we were because of how dark it was, all I know it was far away from both Ulwood and Lulens but unlike the HQ last time this location was in a city. I get out of the car and follow the heavily tattooed man into a weird tattoo shop, the buzzing of the tattoo gun was the very first thing I hear when I enter. Everyone in there (which wasn’t alot) seemed to either not notice or not to care kind of like it was a regular occurrence here. So when we make it to the back I notice a black metal door with a key pad, and as soon as he punches in the code the door clicks open and he motions me to walk inside then closes the door behind me. Which reminds me of this tough pill to swallow, I am once again under San's mercy by coming back..

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#ateez series #ateez angst #ateez x reader #choi san x reader #park seonghwa x reader #ateez imagine #mafia au #non idol au #slow burn #kpop imagines #ateez fanfic

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ayelbee · 10 months

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MORE THAN LOVE | K. MBAPPÉ | 6

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Summary: Sometimes even love is not enough for relationships. But it's fine because you are over it. But getting again in a contact with his younger brother wasn't smart.

TW: bad english, bad writing

Notes: Hey, I know that this took me long enough but i'm back finally! My life has been simple a mess these few moths. But i hope that from now everything is gettig finally better... I don't want to promise you another chapter soon, because I am not really sure, but i will do my best! I am also working on a one shot with LW44... so stay tuned ig? Thank you for your support <3

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The ride to Kylain’s apartment was silent, the car was filled with tension and you wished Kylian would calm down before you got to his apartment. You were watching the Parisian streets, but your eyes darted to Kylian a few times. His knuckles were white as he was gripping the steering wheel. His eyes were darker than normally, he was also 100% focused on the road, but you catched him as he once shot Ethan a look through the mirror, you also felt his eyes on you. But you just digged yourself deeper into the seat.

After thirty minutes you finally arrived at the underground garages. A wave of memories washed over you as Kylian parked. But it was nothing compared to the memories coming up. Kylian unbuckled himself and disappeared from the car, you waited a few seconds before you turned your head to Ethan.

“It will be fine.” you tried to calm Ethan down, as you could see how nervous and scared he was.

“He will kill me.”

“Are you two going or what?” you heard Kylian’s voice from the outside, you could also see him through the window standing next to the elevator. You fastly unbuckled yourself and left the car.

Once Kylian opened the door of his apartment, you could smell the smell of home. You promised yourself that you were over everything that happened, but seeing the familiar corridor leading to the living room, you wished for a moment that this was still your home too.

You followed Kylian closely as he was walking to the living room, your eyes scanning the walls, which used to be filled with paintings, but now they were empty. It felt colder, unfamiliar, uncomfortable.

Ethan was the first to take a seat in the living room. Kylian continued as he sat down on a chair. You took place next to Ethan on the couch. You didn’t know what to do, but after all you were the one who was responsible for this mess.

“Kylian, please don’t be angry with Ethan. We weren't doing this to hurt you.” you wanted to continue, but the voice of your ex boyfriend stopped you.

“Y/n don't defend him. I told you that he will do the speaking.” Kylian looked into your eyes and for a moment you forgot about the world around you. For a second Kylian was calm, his eyes were not as dark as when is angry. His look was soft. And you felt the warmth of home. But this second was fastly turned back into reality. “So Ethan start the explaining:” now both of you were watching Ethan.

It took him a few seconds to find the first words.

“Y/n called me on my birthday-”

“You called him on his birthday, but you didn’t even answer my text on your birthday! And you didn't even wish me a happy birthday” Ethan wasn’t even able to finish the sentence before Kylian interrupted him. Kylian sounded angry at first, but turned into sad as he was now watching you.

“I’m sorry Kylian” now you felt bad for not wishing him a good birthday “I wanted to, but it was after the whole world cup, so i just felt like it would not be a good thing to do.” Kylian was opening his mouth again but Ethan saw the whole awkward situation and decided to continue.

“So she called me and I somehow managed to convince Y/n to let us have another MCU day together. Movies, snacks, you know. So then we met, it was the day after you saw each other on the street and also the day when you called me, with the idea of going to the cinema together.”

“Like the day when you told me that you are out with a girl?” Kylian was confused, his anger stepped down, but he was still pissed.

“Yes, so practically I wasn't lying, I just wasn’t telling the real truth. Anyway then Y/n promised to come watch my game when you won’t be there.” Ethan stopped for a moment, catching another breath as he was speaking as fast as possible. “I never wanted to hurt you, I actually had in my plan to get you two back together. I just wanted to take it slowly, because even that Y/n is saying how over you she is, she is not. She is lying to herself and really badly because I could see it the moment I stepped into her flat. She is missing you, and she still loves you but Y/n is stubborn even more than you! But I know that she is not happy without you” now you were flabbergasted, you didn't understand what had just come out of Ethan, and even though you felt inside that he was right, you didn't admit it.

“Do you know that I am still here Ethan?” that was all what you were capable to say.

“I’m sorry Y/n, but it's just the truth.” Kylian was silent, he was staring onto the wall, thinking about every word that Ethan said. Now he wasn’t angry or pissed, or maybe he was, but just a little. He realized that Ethan is just really still a kid, who wanted to do his best and he he knew that his brother didn’t want to betray him.

You didn’t answer to Ethan, also thinking about every word that came out of him.

“So now, when I explained everything, can we please order some food? I am starving.” The youngest in the room broke the silence.

“Choose something then.” Kylian placed his phone into Ethan’s hand. The room felt again into silence as Ethan was browsing through UberEats.

“I think I will go.” you started to stand up.

“That’s nonsense Y/n, I dragged you all the way across Paris, now let's all eat and then I'll take you both home. Okay?” Kylian was staring into your eyes.

“I don’t know Kylian, I can call myself a taxi.”

“Y/n please, that’s stupid.” he was piercing you with his eyes. You couldn’t say no to these eyes. His eyes were rich and dark, like coffee beans, which you used to love like your morning coffee. But those times were long gone.

“Okay, I guess that I can stay.”

“Great, what do you want to eat?” Kylian smiled a little, convincing you to stay a little longer was his little victory. He wanted to stare at you, he wanted to have you in his presence. He missed your beauty, your smile and everything that came with you. He knew that you weren’t here for him, but still, he was happy just for a moment.

“Look guys, this looks good!” Ethan was turning the screen towards you.

Ethan suggested watching a documentary he'd heard about, while waiting for your food. So now all of you are comfortably sitting in a living room. Except the only person who was focused on this documentary was Ethan. You weren’t able to listen to this document, because your head was full of Kylian. The fact that you felt his gaze on you, wasn’t helping.

Were you actually happy without him? Was Ethan right?

No he wasn’t. Yes, you missed Kylian, but you would not be able to be happy with him. Not when he wasn’t able to accept your job. Not when small things made him angry. Not when he accused you of putting the relationship on the back burner.

These were the things that made you two broke up, these things couldn’t be fixed till the day when Kylian will realize how wrong he is. You did everything to save this. But it just didn’t work out and you won’t waste your years saving something that can’t be saved because of his stubbornness.

Kylian on the other hand was thinking about how to get you back. Words of his brother were stuck in his head. He tried to believe them, so he would have a reason and hope to believe that he can get you back. Hope to believe that he is the best for you and that he is the reason for your happiness. Because he knows that you are the best for him and that you are also the reason for his happiness.

He also felt like he almost forgot how beautiful you are. He couldn’t take his eyes from you. He wished to see you from the front, but even your side profile was everything he needed in his life. And he was ready to give everything in the world to get you back into his life.

–

Two hours later you were back in the car, typing your address into Kylian’s SATNAV. The atmosphere in the car was way more calmer than earlier. You and Kylian exchanged just a few words all afternoon. You were mostly silent, while he and Ethan were talking about football.

Twenty minutes later, the car pulled up in front of Kylian's parents' house. You exchanged quick goodbye with Ethan after another minute Kylian was driving you home. The rest of the drive was silent again, just the soft music coming from the radio echoed through the car. After another twenty minutes Kylian stopped in front of your apartment building.

“Thank you.” you looked at him.

“Don’t, I was happy to do it.” he smiled,

“Take care, Kylian.” you smiled back at him as you were ready to open the door.

“Y/n.” he stopped you as you turned back at him “do you think that we could go out together? Maybe for dinner or something?” his eyes were full of hope.

“I don’t think we should Kylian. This is better for both of us.” you hated to see his eyes sadden, but this was the right thing to do.

“Are you really happy Y/n or was Ethan right?” Kylian’s eyes were intense. You felt like he was reading you like a book. But you still couldn’t let the feelings inside of you take over the rational side of yourself

“Ethan is a kid, he still doesn’t understand life fully.”

“You didn’t answer my question Y/n.” his voice was urgent, Kylian needed to hear that Ethan was right. But you were not able to answer him so instead you gave him one last quick look and you opened the door.

“Bye Kylian.” you could hear your name again, but before he was able to continue you closed the door again and left.

------------

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