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cheesiedomino · 2 months

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RentABoyfriend.com ꙳ ੭ * ‧

synopsis: you’re tired of being single so you to take an unusual route in helping with that— but what happens when you start catching real romantic feelings for your rental boyfriend?

genre: seo changbin x fem!reader | fake relationship/dating au wc: 5.1k tags/warnings: fluff, v minor angst, mild cursing, (kinda) nerdy changbin, use of pet names, mentions of alcohol usage, just overall very cute story dw <33

[this is part of my valentine’s series where i write a short story for each member surrounding themes of love, newfound romance, relationship hardships & more.]

“I have a date tomorrow guys.”

Everyone’s head instantly lifts up from their phones at this sudden announcement, collectively drawing their attention at you. You weren’t expecting all of them to gasp and swap such looks of genuine confusion. It’s starting to make you think maybe this situation was a lot more serious than you’ve bargained it out to be.

You couldn’t fathom it either honestly, the realization of you going out with someone probably won’t settle in until you’re physically on the date. Based on their initial responses though, you might regret everything you’re about to say, but it’s far too late to retract any of your statements now.

“No way.. with who??” Danielle is the first out of everyone to ask.

Taehyung chimes in as well, “Yeah, who’s the lucky person? They’ve gotta be something seriously special to be talking to you.”

Well, you suppose you could put it that way.

You already have a preconceived notion of what they’re going to think of this “idea”. Mentally preparing yourself to receive a flood of questions and critique from your close friends.

“Actually… I rented him. For the week.”

Now they’re all looking at you like you’ve officially lost it. The room got scarily quiet, no one wanted to be the first to speak. You should’ve anticipated on their reactions being like this, it isn’t everyday someone just openly admits to buying a partner online. Nowadays there’s a lucrative market for just about anything, when you stumbled upon an ad for this service called ‘RentABoyfriend.com’ you didn’t think much of it. You laughed the concept off at first, thinking how lonely people must be to buy someone else’s time.

But the ads kept popping up, they wouldn’t stop showing in almost every YouTube video you were watching— even one of your favorite YouTubers promoted them before! So one day you finally decided to check this website out, you wanted to see what the hype’s all about so you signed up just for shits and giggles. You weren’t expecting to actually be somewhat interested in trying this thing out, but after going through a couple different profiles and reading hundreds of positive reviews you were practically sold.

“You rented out a boyfriend..? Seriously ___? I mean, I’m not judging but you’re a gorgeous girl you can easily get a boyfriend without paying for someone’s companionship, I don’t see why you need to rent one.” Mark bluntly expressed his opinion, he was probably the most outspoken out of all of you guys.

Taehyung and Danielle both agreed in unison, it’s practically 3 against 1 at this point. You knew you should’ve waited to tell them but you weren’t anticipating on them being this judgmental about it. You were hoping for a little more support, as they’re all way more experienced than you in the dating scene and could lend some helpful advice about your first date, ever.

See, the thing is you’ve never tried dating before so you wouldn’t know the first thing about it or what to expect from your future partner. You’ve never had a boyfriend, let alone held hands or kissed someone of the opposite sex. Being in your twenties it’s kind of embarrassing to say you’ve never done those things, but you thought what better way to try it out than renting a full-on experience that can give you just that? Well minus the kissing part, but you can make it work.

You were skeptical of doing this whole ‘rent-a-boyfriend’ thing at first because you didn’t think there’d be anyone you’d find suitable enough. A big part of the reason that you’re still single is because you’re extremely picky, you want to date a guy who’s so perfect that he must’ve came straight out of an indie romance film. Your friends would tease you for having such unrealistic standards when it came to dating but you were the all-or-nothing type, you’ll be single with fifty cats before you settle for less. Renting a boyfriend is definitely an unconventional idea of easing into dating but you thought it might be worth a try anyway.

What’s the worse that could happen?

( 1 day earlier )

Hovering your cursor over the bold red text of the website, you read over the main rules before going on to select the person you want for your date.

‘The rules are simple:

You are allowed to see only ONE person at a time, if you want to switch boyfriends you’ll have to pay a $50 fee.

MUST be over 18 to rent a boyfriend, we have implemented an age verification system before the date as we do not tolerate anyone under this age to use our services.

NO kissing, or sexual intimacy allowed. If this is found out later on by our agency we will terminate your contract and ban you from using our services in the future.

Remember to have fun !! ^_^ Our services are great for people who are new to dating or have never been in a relationship. We provide the ~ultimate~ boyfriend experience to all our clients. Customer satisfaction is 100% guaranteed ! (NO REFUNDS)’

Well jeez… they seemed a bit strict but you can deal with those rules and restrictions for the most part.

After hours of skimming through hundreds of profiles, you have a hard time choosing which you like most. Did you want an artsy, shy kind of guy? The tattooed, bad boy aesthetic type? You really couldn’t pick one until you stumble upon a particular profile that catches your eye almost immediately.

SEO CHANGBIN | 168 CM | PART-TIME LIFEGUARD | 24 | *POPULAR ↝

5 Facts About Me: I’ve traveled to over 50+ different countries and counting (ask me which my favorites are), I can speak 4 languages (working on my fifth), love to sing and used to have a rap trio with my buddies from college, I can & will easily lift you up ;) also have a secret talent for cooking, there’s nothing I can’t do!

Why Choose Me? First of all, why not choose me? I’m the best candidate for whatever kind of date you need, something casual, social gatherings, weddings, you name it! I’m very social and can make most people laugh (unless they’re the literal Grinch reincarnated), I’m able to get along well with anyone and just love to have a good time. I hope we can get to know each other and make great memories in the future :)

Going through his pictures you couldn’t believe someone was capable of being this humanely attractive. Don’t even get started on those impeccable muscles either… He really had to sport them in every other one of his photos, wearing the tightest shirts to show the outline of his insanely sculpted frame. You might have just been mesmerized from his godlike visuals alone. They even had a Valentine’s Day deluxe package that comes with seven dates in total for half the price, which they specified was for a limited time only.

$600 later you’ve got a full week of dates lined up with the hottest guy you’ve ever seen in all your years of living. You should’ve definitely went shopping before considering all this because now you actually have a reason to get dolled up for someone.

You were so nervous about going on this date you almost cancelled last minute out of fear. Typing out several different elaborate paragraphs to Changbin on why you couldn’t make it. You didn’t have his real phone number, it was all through an app facilitated by the rental company that was included in the package. Even though you were feeling overwhelmed and practically shaking with anxiety about meeting up with a guy, you still forced yourself to go anyway. You didn’t just dish out all that money just to not show up and waste his time on top of all that.

Your rental boyfriend texted you the location to meet at, it was near a train station so you both could see each other out in a public open space. The outfit you wore was fairly simple, a black mini skirt with warm tights underneath and a cropped turtleneck sweater. You accessorized the look with some dainty jewelry, a thin scarf, and knee high boots to pull everything together. It wasn’t something you usually wore but you had certain clothes you saved for a special occasion like this.

Upon your arrival, you notice him standing near a vending machine and waves over at you with the biggest smile plastered on his face. You awkwardly wave back, giving a soft smile as you slowly walk up to him. He looks even better in person, you don’t even feel adequate enough to be in such a gorgeous man’s presence. No wonder he’s so popular on the site, he’s practically unreal.

“Hi, you must be ___. It’s so nice to finally meet you, might I add you look really beautiful today, I think you’re making my heart race just by looking at you. Happy Valentine’s Day!” Changbin introduces himself, buttering you up with some sweet compliments before handing you the most insane bouquet of roses you’ve ever seen.

You take the flowers and almost stumble backwards from how heavy they were, “Wow, thank you!” Changbin prevents you from falling, quickly coming up behind you to get your balance back.

“Careful honey, can’t have you injured on our first date!” He voices with concern, “I hope you love the idea I came up with, I’ve only been to this place once before but I’m sure it’s still as fun as I remember it, let’s go!” Eagerly grabbing your hand to begin the journey, he turns around again to examine your body language.

“You seem a little tense babe? Do you need a massage?” He asks in a concerned tone again, this is all really beginning to freak you out. You know this is what you signed up for but this was all starting to feel a bit too personal, all the nicknames and sweet talk he’s giving is just something you aren’t used to.

“Uh, no! It’s o-okay.” You shook your head, denying anything suspicious going on. Truth be told you were barely able to contain your composure right now.

Changbin keeps on insisting, “The massage is included in the package so you don’t have to worry about getting charged extra.”

“N-no it’s okay, really. I’m just nervous that’s all, sorry I just don’t meet up with guys…” you shyly admit, finding it hard to look him in the eye.

He nods in understanding, “No need to be nervous with me sweetheart. I’m here to make you feel as comfortable as possible.” The smile he flashes at you instantly makes you warm on the inside, he seems like a genuine, caring person. You think things might go well for you after all.

The rest of the night was full of only good vibes and laughter by the end of it all. Changbin took you to an adult arcade that had old video games like Pac-Man, Super Mario, and Space Invaders, the other side was a bar where people could sit, drink, and socialize. He bought all your drinks that night, let you use up most of his tokens and overall had the most fun you could’ve ever had with someone. He was so easygoing but also knew when to act super caring and would be all lovey dovey with you. He was gentle, nurturing, and could have conversations about anything. You loved that he’d randomly drop some interesting fact you never knew about, or talked about a certain niche topic that he’d go on multiple rants over. It didn’t feel like you were renting someone out to date you, it felt natural— like you’ve known him for longer than a couple hours. Changbin walked you home and held your hand the entire time, along with the flowers he provided a teddy bear and a heart shaped box of chocolates. If that didn’t scream boyfriend goals then you don’t know what does.

The next day you wake up to Changbin blowing your phone up this morning. You had over 26 messages from him, which was pretty excessive in your humble opinion. The first thing he said was good morning then he goes on to express how fun yesterday was and he can’t wait to do it again. He even sent a couple mirror selfies of him at the gym, ‘conceited much?’ You thought. But then again, if you were Seo Changbin you’d probably be full of yourself too.

For today’s date you wore a pretty red sundress that made your skin glow in the sunlight. It’ll definitely get him to compliment you even more— which you secretly love when he does. Changbin calls you before he heads out to the date, letting you know how excited he is to see you again. You couldn’t stop smiling like an idiot on the train as you made your way to the destination, thinking about what he’s planned for you two next. This time you’ll be meeting up at a park but you still have no clue what you’re doing.

Changbin texts you where exactly he is in the park, it was pretty huge so it took you a while to get to him. As you get closer you see him sitting on a large blanket by the lake, on top of it were a bunch of different foods and snacks scattered all around that came out of a huge picnic basket. You were speed walking at this point trying to get to him. His arms opened out for a hug and you lean right into him, what you didn’t expect was for him to suddenly stand up and lift you in his arms to swing around you like a doll.

“Put me down I’m scared of heights!” You squeal out in fear of being too high up in the air. Maybe you really should’ve taken the bio on his profile more seriously when he mentioned certain things.

Finally putting you down after minutes go by of you protesting, Changbin sits you back onto the blanket. He brought an assortment of breads, cheese, fruits, lemonade that he made himself and a couple seltzers. You’ve never seen anyone put such time and effort into a date before, even being here with him is like living in a daydream. He was definitely succeeding in making you feel comfortable, which is something you never thought was possible with men. He actually took his time getting to know you and didn’t sound arrogant whenever he talked about himself, Changbin was so different than other guys who’ve tried hitting on you in the past. He was actually respectful, intelligent, and could easily carry a conversation without long, awkward pauses.

He was literally everything you’re looking for in a guy. But you’ll be seeing him for this week only then it’s bye bye forever. That revelation makes you a little upset, but you try pushing those thoughts in the back of your mind. It’s irrelevant and unnecessary to think about. Yet you can’t help but wonder about certain things though, wanting to know more about his job and what it’s like on a daily basis for him.

“Can I ask you something? I need you to answer it honestly.” You say out of nowhere, hoping that didn’t come out as weird as you thought.

Changbin nods, “of course, shoot.”

“How many clients do you usually get?”

This question definitely catches him off guard, he’s never really been asked this before and he’s debating on if he should as it might be a breach of privacy.

“I don’t think I can answer that, sorry.” He responds in the nicest way possible, but deep down he wants to know why you’d want to know how many other people he sees a day.

You were going to push him a bit more to try and get an answer but you decide to let it go and just enjoy the rest of the picnic. You didn’t want to bring the mood down with your odd questions and/or end up making him feel so uncomfortable that he won’t want to see you anymore. It was definitely something you shouldn’t have asked but you were curious to know anyway. Overall besides that small incident, you had another wonderful time with Changbin and couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come any faster.

Changbin had a foolproof way of getting you to blush like a giddy high school teen whenever he texted you. He’d always refer to you as ‘pretty girl’ or ‘princess’ which gave you insane amount of butterflies. You loved how clingy he could get and would double text when you don’t reply fast enough, always needing constant attention from you which you never minded giving.

He texted you at around three in the afternoon, proposing his next plan for today’s date.

‘Let’s go out for drinks tonight, it’s all on me ;)’

You liked his message, replying that you’ll be there and put a series of hearts at the end. Speaking of hearts, yours is fluttering at high altitudes from the way you can’t stop thinking about your “boyfriend” Changbin. This has been better than anything you could’ve expected, you never want this week to come to an end. It’s only been three days but you’ve begun to grow feelings for him, they weren’t too strong just yet but they were most definitely there. You couldn’t let that halt you from having a good time tonight, you’ll have to accept it soon enough he’s not your actual boyfriend. He’s doing this because you paid him to, if it wasn’t for your money he wouldn’t be here right now.

‘This relationship is purely transactional’ you unfortunately keep reminding yourself of the reality you’re in. Psyching yourself out of this sudden somber mood that’s consuming you, distracting your pessimism by raiding your closet for some cute clothes to wear tonight’s date. After what seemed like hours of tearing your entire room apart, you decide to settle on this sparkly black mini tube dress, pairing it with a leather jacket and more platform shoes because you’re obsessed with feeling tall. Once it’s 7 PM you head out to the bar you’re seeing Changbin at, he was already waiting for you inside the place. Eyes instantly lighting up when he sees you coming towards him, just like he always does he motions for a hug, pulling you in tightly like he hasn’t seen you in years.

His hugs felt so cozy, like sitting in front of the fireplace on a crisp, snowy winter’s evening. You never wanted to escape the warmth of his arms, it was one of those forms of physical touch that felt so overly personal to you. The thought of him hugging someone the same way he hugs you slightly enrages something in your spirit but again, it isn’t your place to get genuinely upset over him doing his job. You’re not entitled to him exclusively, but you feel like if you keep this up feelings will only continue to develop. This wasn’t something you considered when going into this and now you feel like you’ve just made a huge mistake.

“You okay babe?” Changbin notices you acting a bit strange, choosing not to pursue it after telling him you’re fine. He knows something’s wrong but doesn’t want to mess up the flow of the date, instead he orders a drink for the both of you and switches on to a lighter subject. “Let’s go shopping tomorrow at that new centre that just opened last week. I need to buy some new AirPods, I accidentally lost one of them in a taxi..”

“Sure,” you nod at his suggestion, in desperate need of some new clothes anyway. “Sorry about your AirPods, that sucks!”

He takes a sip of his bubbly drink that’s now on the table, “Eh, it’s okay this is probably the fourth time this has happened so far.” This has pretty much become a regular occurrence for him by now.

As the date progresses, things continue getting better. You’re both laughing, engaging in much deeper conversation than ever before. You definitely had more than enough alcohol in your system by now, feeling congested and claustrophobic as more people came into the bar. Changbin takes note of your discomfort and asks if you want to get some fresh air outside, you wasted absolutely no time to agree.

While you two were outside continuing your chat about some wild conspiracy he read about online, Changbin’s attention was soon drawn to a different building nearby. Gazing up in confusion at his sudden outburst of excitement, you wonder where he could be leading you next.

“Noraebang!” He shouts loud enough anyone miles away could’ve heard that, he’s now grabbing your hand to frantically drag you along with him.

You were never one to carry a tune but Changbin was actually very good at karaoke and singing in general, he had such a lovely voice. You could seriously listen to him sing all night— which you basically did since you kept begging for an encore until it hit 4 am. That’s when you both decided to finally call it a night, you wanted to pay for the Uber since he’s paid for all the drinks and every other expenses for today. You felt bad because you were the one renting him to be your boyfriend yet he’s constantly shelling out money left and right. He still insisted on paying and ultimately won the whole debacle, making you swallow your pride and get into the Uber with him. Changbin’s definitely not just someone you’re going to forget about after this week is over. You dread the day this all comes to an end, wishing there was a way to relive these moments again and again.

“I’m a little under the weather today, sorry I can’t make it Binnie.” Your voice is hoarse from coughing and unbearable throat pain. You’ve already consumed half a bag of cough drops, throat lozenges, and random cold medicine you’ve found in your cabinets.

He sounds mildly disappointed, but springs back up with a new proposal, “I can come over and bring some soup if you’d like!”

You appreciate his gesture but still refuse, you know he’s only saying all this because he has to, not because he wants to. “N-no you don’t have to, I’m sure you can go see other clients today. One less person to worry about right?”

The call went silent for a minute, he wasn’t quite sure how to respond to such a deprecating comment.

“I don’t want to see other clients, I want to see you ___.” He sighs, unwilling to give up so easily, “I’ll be at your place soon, m’kay?” He hangs up before you could even respond or say no again.

You had no choice but to wait for Changbin to show up now. Before you got sick, the last two dates you went on were debatably the best so far. You had gone out shopping together, accidentally wearing almost the same kind of outfit. Changbin was wearing a white graphic tee with blue baggy jeans and you wore something practically identical. The two of you looked like a real, official couple and people would stare as you walked hand in hand, it really did seem like the perfect relationship on the outside.

You got even closer when he came over the following day, resulting in you two cuddling while watching movies and baking cookies. He’s expressed that he’s never been to another client’s home before but it wasn’t “technically” against any rules. The more you kept hanging out together, the harder it was coming to terms with the fact you’re actually falling for Changbin. He made every experience with you more exciting than the last, which he did exactly that night. When the cookies were done you fed a piece to him, making little airplane sounds as you do it, he eagerly takes a bite of the chewy treat and compliments both your efforts.

“These taste way better than I thought, oh my god they literally melt in your mouth. Try it!” He takes another cookie from the tray and feeds it to you this time.

There was something so overly domestic about that moment you couldn’t shake the feelings of wanting to kiss him right then and there. But you can’t. If you did such a thing you’d never be allowed to see him again, plus you don’t want to be known as that one creepy client who just couldn’t keep their hands to themselves. As you were cuddling on the couch though, things may have taken a turn for the better… or worse?

Changbin would “yawn” at the movie and subtly wrap his arm around you, he’d subconsciously pull you in closer and it didn’t make it any better that you were under the same blanket. You weren’t complaining at any of this though, you were pretty much in heaven. It took everything in you not to look up and stare, gluing your eyes to the movie that was displayed on the TV. But as the night progressed you were practically snuggling up with him like he was your real boyfriend. The way he’d run his fingers gently down your back, soothing you in a way that could lull you asleep. His touch was the most relaxing thing ever, you were so calm with him and loved how he brought a side of you that’s never been shown. After this encounter you can no longer deny the way you feel— you are officially falling deeply in love your rental boyfriend, Seo Changbin.

The sound of your doorbell ringing alarms you of a new visitor, who was none other than your “boyfriend” waiting patiently outside the door for you. You feel and look like death itself, coming downstairs to answer the door still in your PJ’s and hair a disheveled mess. Every five seconds was interrupted with you coughing your lungs out, barely able to speak above a whisper. Changbin looks thrilled as ever to see you, even when you clearly don’t look your best he’s still coming up to hug you tightly. His hugs are always blocking off your airways from the way his muscles squeeze you, it’s even worse when you’re sick— practically gasping for air.

“Sorry babyy, I just missed you so much. I couldn’t stop thinking about you all day and soon as you said you’re sick I dropped everything to go make you this soup. It’s a specialty I make whenever my friends are sick, the perfect remedy to cure my princess.” He goes into your kitchen to heat up the soup in your microwave, making you wait patiently on the couch as you’re wrapped up in multiple blankets.

Your body feels like it’s -2 degrees, you were freezing. The crazy thing is your thermostat was set to 80 degrees, it was definitely you that was the problem. He propped your feet up on the table, rested a tray in your lap and set the bowl of soup on top. Brushing a couple strands of hair out your face he looks at you intently, examining your symptoms as if he’s a doctor.

“It’ll be okay soon love, I’m here to nurse you back to health again. Can’t see my pretty baby sick like this, makes me all sad.” He pouts, giving you a soft head pat like you’re a delicate kitten.

He takes a spoonful of the hot soup, slightly blowing on it before telling you to open up so you can eat. You don’t know what’s gotten into you but you feel like he’s gone too far with all this. It’s not fair for you to continue on if it’s just become torture now. He’s practically dangling in your face that you’ll never have a partner as perfect as him in your life.

“I- I can’t do this anymore Changbin..” you say lowly, refusing to eat the soup he made.

“What do you mean? I’m just feeding you soup, it’s my duty as your boyfriend to-”

“This isn’t real… none of it is. I’m stupid for even doing this but I was lonely.. I’m sorry but I’d prefer something that isn’t temporary.” You cut him off to express your pent up frustrations, ready to be let down and rejected by him as gently as possible.

“Then let’s make it real,” he proposes without any hesitation, “honestly I stopped faking it around our third date, it was all me after that. I never said anything because well… this is my job and I’ve never fallen for a client before so this is still all very new to me..”

You’d be screaming right now if you weren’t sick, instead you’re internally freaking out at this confession, it feels like your hearts doing cartwheels and somersaults.

“Seriously?” Eyes widening as you look at him, suddenly your body heat rises and you know it’s not because of the soup or the layers of blankets that’s covering you.

He nods, “I thought it was kinda obvious when we kissed yesterday..”

Oh yeah… you forgot that did happen. You thought it was another fever dream you might’ve just made up in your head. You shared your first kiss with someone you deemed so special and important to you, someone you never would’ve guessed could come into your life and shift the entirety of your world like magic. There was no one else in existence you wanted more than Changbin.

“Doesn’t that mean you’ll have to quit your job? I don’t want to be the reason you stop making such good income.. I’ll feel so bad.” You knew deep down you didn’t feel that badly about him quitting to date you instead. It was just the thought of him leaving something he’s been doing for years behind all for some girl he’s known for simply a week.

He shrugs at your comment, “I’ll be just fine, I was planning on finding a new job soon anyway. It gets kinda old after a while, I felt like I was on autopilot most of the time. You were able to get me to open up and show my true self, I could never thank you enough for that ___.” Changbin couldn’t resist the urge to plant a kiss to your forehead.

After everything that’s been said and done. What you’ve come to understand is that love is learned, a development that takes time to grow and blossom into something extraordinary. Just like learning a new language or a musical instrument, we learn love from society and cultures we’re raised in, it’s a beautiful thing once we know how to cherish it. Your newfound romance with Changbin is something you’ll learn to cherish forever and ever.

[End <3].

#skz fluff #skz x reader #changbin fluff #seo changbin fluff #stray kids imagines #skz drabbles #changbin x reader #changbin skz #changbin x female reader #seo changbin x reader #stray kids fluff #changbin scenarios #changbin drabbles #changbin imagines #skz au #skz scenarios #stray kids scenarios #stray kids drabbles #skz imagines

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watching-sam-and-dean-again · 7 months

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Watching a reactor on YouTube who just got to Season 4: Lazarus Rising, and I’m so annoyed by the amount of comments with people saying things like, "this is when the series REALLY starts" and "Seasons 1-3 were the prologue, now The Story begins" and "I’ve been waiting for you to meet my favorite character!"

First, I will never be able to understand Castiel being someone's legitimate favorite character. I just don’t get it. He starts off as a massive dick, becomes an ally, uses and betrays both brothers a number of times, rarely takes full responsibility for his actions, and ends up as a totally different and neutered version of himself. But this guy is your favorite!? The only reason I think a large number of fans who love him do is because he comes in the gate treating Sam like crap and he becomes a simp for Dean (or they are shippers). Also, if someone is a more casual fan, I can see enjoying Cass because he’s quirky and he mostly stands up for the Winchesters, but if someone is a big fan of the brothers, Cass makes their lives harder a lot of the time. Also, I’m coming to really hate the fact that the dude is always in a trench coat. How am I supposed to take a character seriously who is essentially like an unchanging cartoon character come to life? Anyway, despite how it might sound from my ranting, I actually do think people are allowed to love whatever character they want, but it just doesn’t compute for me personally that it’s Cass as he is on screen (not in someone’s head).

Next, the idea of people calling the first three seasons "The Prologue" to supernatural is offensive to me personally (well, not offensive but it’s dumb as hell). A prologue is used to give some important background that should be known for you to better understand the main story, but it happened before, or doesn’t quite fit into, the main narrative. I’m sorry, but the first three seasons of Supernatural are the foundation that everything builds off of, and maybe I’m splitting hairs here, but it’s not just the set up to the Real Story. The Real Story of Supernatural has always been and will always be "the epic love story of Sam and Dean," not the angel crap. Calling the basis of the whole show the prologue has an implied message that it’s not as important as, or connected to the rest of the story. Again, people are allowed to have their own opinions about what they enjoy in media, but this idea that what came before Season 4 wasn’t as important as the rest of the show is actually bad media literacy, especially when you consider how much retconning and inconsistency later seasons have (*cough* John Winchester, for exapmle). The early seasons are Supernatural at its most pure, and if you don’t like or care about Sam and Dean's story, what are you doing here?

I was going to go on by listing all of the important things that we learn about Sam and Dean's characters and relationship in the first three seasons, but honesty, I’m tired. If you’re reading my post, I’m sure you already know. True fans of the show, even if seasons 1 to 3 aren’t their favorite, know how important these seasons are. Frankly, if someone claims that they don’t matter as much as the later season, then I’m going to assume that they are probably a heller (and I’m probably right), thus their opinions on the show don’t matter.

Speaking of Hellers, they are the Jehovah’s Witnesses of fandom. They descend on your doorstep (YouTube video, blog post, etc), uninvited and unwelcome, to make you uncomfortable by forcing their literature (head-canons and subtext) on you in a vain attempt to make you convert to their twisted version of a cult religion (Destiel). Some get indoctrinated into their cult, others consider them a joke, and yet others are driven to madness by the constant hounding of the hellers. I wish they would just stay in their lane and let people come to their own conclusions about the show and the characters, but they try to gatekeep the fandom experience by jumping on anyone new and telling them how they are the "most popular ship" and that supernatural queerbaits, but Dean and Cass are still totes husbands, and there is some other guy there, too but Sam is just some jerk who isn’t as important as Wuwu Dean and their Little Meow Meow Cass. If somone actually sees and enjoys Destiel on their own, great, good for them; they’ll find the blogs and groups who love it too. Hellers don’t need to try actively recruiting people. It’s all just a numbers gone to them. We have the most fanfic (um, yes, because the show doesn’t deliver what you want), we are the most popular ship (sure, because the other main ship is brothers which squicks some people out, and because you crucify anyone who admits to being a Wincest shipper), and they tell the stupidest lies (the show shifts away from being about the brothers, and focusses more on Dean and Cass' "relationship," and Sam isn’t as important to the story later). I wish they would just stay in their own sandbox and not come pee in everyone else's. Cult like behavior in action.

Okay, deep breaths. I’m grad I got that one off of my chest, but my blog is getting very ranty. I’m going to try make sure my next post is a positive one.

Happy weekend everyone!

#anti hellers #anti destiel #supernatural #sam and dean #spn meta #Fandom BS #Castiel critical #the epic love story of Sam and Dean #thanks to the gif makers

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hwaightme · 1 year

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Your fan, Jongho (part 1)

(part 2) (your fan ml)

⚽pairing: jongho x footballer!gn!reader ⚽summary: a bulletpoint-style drabble of what it would be like to have jongho stanning you. part two here ⚽wordcount: 1.4k ⚽warnings/tags: unedited, jongho falling fast, you are a football prodigy, hongjoong lowkey is a wingman, jongho hiding feelings, sports, football, cute romance, overall wholesome vibes (lmk if anything isn't here) ⚽a/n: thank you so much for all the support and kindness <3 here is a bit of a brainwave I had, which may or may not turn into a series for all members (think "Your fan, _____)~

An avid football fan, he was proud to know the names of any new players who were making the rounds as rising stars

While casually viewing highlights of the team that won the national championship not long ago, he took note of you.

Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, you were a fresh face on the field for him.

Recently you took the sports world by storm, having qualified for major championships an really moving up in the ranks to become a renowned forward.

Jongho, along with many of your team's fans, could not help but be captivated by you.

For him, it was your perseverance that did it. And the way the uniform looked on you but that is BESIDES THE POINT

He would never say that. Only hard work, professionalism and... oh no did he have a celebrity crush?

Was this how ATINY felt????

He was in a blur while he went down the YouTube spiral, starting by watching one of your most recent post-match interviews, and never quite finishing his deep dive because there were always more videos to watch.

Probably nobody would ever know that he was indifferent to you; as in, he was more than watching you and your team play.

He was cheering YOU on, knowing the training you did and the tough challenges you overcame. Cheering YOU on because he knew unlike any other what it was like to have the world scrutinizing you.

Cheering YOU on because that was what his heart felt inclined to do. Jongho had a separate football account, and even though he did not really interact with other fans, it gave him exactly what he wanted - the ability to live out his fanboy dreams, be it football overall or to learn more about you.

Actually went to see the matches you have been announced to play in, if time allowed.

Though either way he knew he would enjoy it because, well, he likes the sport, if you weren't playing since first half-time he hated to admit but he'd pay a little less attention.

This man had learned your club's songs and fanchants, hands down. Easy as pie.

Okay so he was still a tiny bit in denial about having a full-blown crush on you because "why would he experience any sort of affection towards someone he has never met"

Almost got caught by the other members when he was smiling proudly at his phone screen, rewatching an advertisement you recently starred in, kind of in the fashion: "look at my bias go, they are so amazing I cannot believe that I have the opportunity to watch!!!!!"

But he was prepared - so he quickly switched to some ATINY edit from one of their shows as soon as he saw someone attempting to creep up behind him; deception 100

Then came the fateful day, one during which his heart actually flip-flopped, did a spin and soared like his high notes.

A video interview with you for a magazine had been released, and for some reason or other ATEEZ kept on being bombarded with it on twitter. It got to the point where even the totally ‘football indifferent’ members were curious.

The next few minutes were excruciating for Jongho – squeezed between San and Yeosang, the group gathered around to check what the fuss was about, or whether it was just ATINY going a tad... enthusiastic after the comeback, for fun.

The adrenaline rush that accompanied trying not to reveal his excitement was eating Jongho from the inside. You were literally going into depth about your childhood dreams and motivations, how you trained and what you were hoping for in the future.

So far so… normal? Only Jongho was hyped (even though he had a poker face on)

BUT THEN

The interview moved in a musical direction. The magazine enjoyed presenting what celebrities listen to in their free time or when going about their day, so they always asked what the top tracks of their interviewees were.

And you being the legend you are, after thinking about “what song has been playing on repeat recently when you are in the gym?”, said “Well, Guerrilla by ATEEZ is fantastic. I have been listening to that quite a bit.”

It was at this moment all members lost their minds

Woop-wooping, screaming and hollering, they were punching each other’s shoulders

You, an internationally sought-after player, rising star in football, completely unrelated their world just so happened to listen to their music?

Jongho was on cloud nine

But seeing as you were continuing to talk, aggressively shushed at the rest of his members

“The power and passion in their music in general is unreal. Like take this song. That high note, on ‘flashing light’, going into the chorus… makes me run double-speed.”

“Have you been to their concerts?”

“Not yet, unfortunately, but hopefully stars will align.” And that was that. Jongho was offered congratulatory pats on the back for having his part be mentioned. No wonder ATINY were spamming their social media accounts.

Jongho waited until everyone is back to chaotic neutral to slink away into his dorm room and rewatch the video again. And again. A gummy smile not leaving his face.

That was when he got a thousand lightbulbs flashing above his head – rushing, he asked his manager if it was okay for ATEEZ to follow you on social media, talking some nonsense about ‘possibly adding more popularity and going with the trend’… the details did not matter, he got what he wanted and was really giddy about it.

Soon enough, your official account was also following them back. (the crowd goes wild)

If only he could see you, in the backseat of a car with your agent, squealing in excitement when you saw THE notification pop up. You shook the living daylights out of them, continuously pointing at your screen and repeating “OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSHOHMYGOSH DO YOU SEE WHO IS FOLLOWING ME ATEEZ IS FOLLOWING ME OHMYGOSHICANNOTHOWISTHISREAL”

Unbeknownst to you, your agent was already liaising with the right people at KQ to potentially arrange an informal meeting – yes, you were lucky you had them working with you. You down-played just how much you listened to ATEEZ while preparing for matches but could not help mentioning your respect for the idols.

It worked out well because suddenly ticket sales for your next match went up? And generally, publicity was looking good? Agents were not mad at all.

Fast-forward a couple of weeks, and after a brilliant match with you scoring the winning goal on the 91st minute, you had the chance to meet your number one fan.

Jongho had no idea how he was fortunate enough to have this arranged for him – apparently he was almost not allowed to go, with some staff stating that Hongjoong should be the one to do the networking, but Hongjoong, being the captain, and having caught on that Jongho was a lot more ‘involved’ with your activities than anybody else, demanded the maknae to represent ATEEZ.

The man was over the moon when greeting you in person for the first time. Though you did not have much time to talk, nor could you dive into anything that would reveal your mutual pining seeing as you had whole armies of staff floating around you, photographers and videographers around every corners… both of you had a great time.

You felt as though he understood you without any extensive explanations needed. Not only was he knowledgeable about the sport, but he was just… so attentive and gentlemanly.

As more people were leaving the stadium and the changing rooms, finally you had a moment of quiet to yourselves. And in that exact moment, Jongho sharply inhaled and produced, seemingly OUT OF NOWHERE, the most recent ATEEZ album.

He was not sure whether to gift you the album or a Lightiny, but chose the former to be less ‘imposing’ and risking to force fandomship upon you or something. Pretty much went full rumination-station, which was quite unlike him.

Either way you would have been incredibly grateful and would have displayed the present on one of your shelves. The fact that someone you admired and who you felt admired you was thoughtful enough to bring anything made you soft.

Grinning wide, you wished each other success for the future and hoped to meet again soon.

Which was MUCH sooner than you would have imagined. Since once you got home and opened the album, a neatly folded piece of paper fell out with a cute note from Jongho and his personal number.

Now that is a clean goal.

a/n: thank you for reading! Here is part 2

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becca4leafclover · 2 months

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IM STUPID I FIGURED OUT WHATS BOTHERING ME ABOUT A MINECRAFT MOVIE

IT NEEDS TO BE A MINECRAFT TV SHOW!

the problem with it being a Minecraft Movie is that movies are a lot more widespread and generalized. There's too much of an audience that will watch the Minecraft Movie, and they're going to be incredibly critical of it because of the way Minecraft works being rather odd to people who dont know it (and there's probably a LOT of people who don't know it, because while Minecraft is the #1 sold game of all time, it's also still a game most people over 30 don't know because its out of their generations.)

If they make a "realistic" Minecraft Movie, they're going to lose their actual playerbase though, because we want Block Game! Yes Jason Mamoa looks like Steve but I think players would riot if there was a live-action Minecraft Movie. But if they make it blocky animation or something, that's too stylized to realistically appeal to the greater audience. Disney 3D animation is one thing, the people and world and items all being made of cubes I think is too much of a stretch.

There's also the method of storytelling- Minecraft, as a game, has no plot. THAT'S THE ENTIRE SELLING POINT OF THE GAME! Any stories told within Minecraft are usually made with interpretations of the player, and often use ideas or mechanics not in the vanilla game (whether that is characters, builds, mods, or just the story itself not following the rules of the game)

And with this I think of Minecraft: Story Mode. Because that game literally was an early prototype of how this can all go.

Now don't get me wrong, I love MCSM! It's what got me into fandom in the first place and everything has gone downhill from there /lh. But the fact is, that 1. the storytelling was, well not the greatest, and 2. it's major plots all revolved with things that are straight up impossible in vanilla Minecraft. (The Witherstorm still is one of the coolest forces of destruction I've ever seen, but imagine THAT being summonable in the Block Game without mods? no way.) Not to mention the portal halls and world hopping, the specially enchanted flint and steel? Or don't get me started on what MCSM S2 was- if there's too much straying from the base game, the nicher the mechanics and genre get, and the more and more portions of the Minecraft playerbase you lose.

So whoever is producing this Minecraft Movie, kind of has to choose which audience they're going to cater to and which they're going to lose: the general greater movie-watching audience, who are probably only willing to tolerate a more "realistic" movie style or typical storytelling experience, or actual Minecraft fans in the blocky format and the general weirdness of telling a story in Minecraft.

BUT!

A Minecraft TV Show can EASILY solve this conflict of genre!

MINECRAFT YOUTUBE AND MINECRAFT ROLEPLAY LITERALLY ALREADY EXIST!

These are wildly successful! When I'm describing Starlighter I literally tell people I help to make a TV show in Minecraft! This is not new! (The entire reason I got thinking about this was a photo of a fan meeting Aphmau, MumboJumbo, Valkrae, and a few more MCYTs I don't remember, in New Zealand where supposedly the Minecraft Movie is being filmed).

Making an official Minecraft TV Show, whether its on Netlfix or Cartoon Network or something else, narrows down the audience they're having to appeal to to an audience that ALREADY ENJOYS NICHE AND STYLIZED THINGS! Cause this can just be treated as a cartoon! I think of Tangled: The Series or the Big Hero 6 TV show that have their big original original format where the characters are introduced have their serious story, but these cartoons are allowed to be more stylized and silly (and yes ofc they have their serious plot but it's not the same as the formality of their full movies) or even The Owl House that had a darker, more grotesque (not in a bad way) style, but was still wildly successful because the audience for it was already prepared for weird new styles and worlds and don't mind (in fact I think a lot PREFER) unique storytelling styles like what Minecraft kind of needs!

I dont know where I'm going with this I just finally cracked the code of why I can't bring myself to be excited about the Minecraft Movie when I think it's going to be doomed, and it's because it's in the wrong format for what it needs. I can't believe they're reinventing the wheel with this JUST MAKE IT AN ANIMATED TV SHOW MCYT IS LITERALLY RIGHT THERE...

#becca rambles #minecraft #minecraft movie #cant believe this has taken me MONTHS to figure out

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msviolacea · 1 year

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So I started playing a solo TTRPG this weekend - I’m trying out a solo Curse of Strahd campaign to see how it works and whether I can hit some of the story beats my other campaign didn’t due to the natural progression of their stories. And I have some thoughts about the process!

1) Honestly I think anyone who likes telling stories to themselves should try playing a solo TTRPG at some point. It’s a delicious balance between “I want ALL THE CONTROL” and “someone please for the love of god TELL ME WHAT COMES NEXT.”

2) It’s also very good for someone whose attention span issues are similar to mine - I find it really, really hard to concentrate on a game for the amount of time a regular group wants to play. Like, I know my D&D group would probably happily play for more than 3 hours at a time, but that’s the limit of my attention span for running a thing in one sitting. And if I’m a player, I need to be doing Something Else in order to keep my brain happy for several hours of talking and back and forth. (In the Zoom gaming era, “something else” is usually “mindlessly farming crafting resources in a video game.”) But playing solo, I can just go “hey, I’m gonna run a scene for an hour” and then I can be done! And go back to the next scene the next day!

3) I cannot recommend Mythic GM Emulator enough - either as a tool for solo roleplaying or general GMing or adventure design or just a writing tool. It’s got a great system for asking yes/no questions, determining how likely the ‘yes’ answer might be, and providing a d100 table to roll on accordingly. It also has great tables and rules for generating random encounters, or just inspiring you to think about what this next location/NPC/enemy might be and what role they’ll play in the narrative.

4) Choose whatever TTRPG system you want to play with the GM Emulator (or whatever tool you choose to replace the GM) based on how much detail you want to deal with. I’m having fun using 5E, but it’s a lot of back and forth between books and character sheets. It would be less work to run it with a more narrative-based system, but that also depends on your comfort level with said system. I’ve been watching a YouTube series of a voice actor who plays his first solo season with Savage Worlds, and that seems to be a good level of crunch versus narrative decisions. And I know Ironsworn is built for solo or duo play, I just need to learn the system at some point. But since I’m incredibly familiar with 5E and CoS in specific, it felt like a good way to test out the GM Emulator and general flow of solo play.

5) I know there are a ton of solo journaling TTRPGs out there, and I plan to play some of them at some point, but where my head is at right now, playing something that has more rails to it is better for jumpstarting my creativity. Leave too many doors open, and I just won’t create anything at all. But hopefully after a while, I can “graduate” (for certain values) to something that simply gives you prompts, rather than a full game system.

So, I’m having fun so far, and can highly recommend the experience, especially if you want to experience a particular system or adventure but don’t have a group to do it with, or if you just want something to jumpstart your creative muscles.

#jaime rambles #solo ttrpg

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hamsterrod · 8 months

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LPS POPULAR REMAKE RECOMMENDATION AND RAMBLE

(but on an account that aligns with my "hamsterrod" "Rodney" one.)

Once I get into rambling about the series itself, I'll leave a cutoff to avoid spoiling anyone. However, since this is also a recommendation, I better give you all a good descriptor of what you might like about it.

The LPS Popular remake (MLP Fever on YouTube! Hey Cleo.) is a new spin on the series started by SophieGTV over a decade ago. I say new spin super heavily, because while lots carries over, it does deviate quite a bit from the original. (Love that part about it, just so you know.)

The first season takes place in the same highschool setting of the original, with the second taking place in college instead. To be as vague as possible about what to expect from this story, here are some things I think Tumblr users might like!

• Canonically LGBT characters. I'm aware of two (unlabelled in canon) sapphic characters, a bisexual character, a canonically gay character, and a canonically trans character. The majority of which appear super early on. • A highschool drama. Well, for the first season anyway. It's a lot closer to the original than season 2, but has enough differences to ease you into the changed plot and the things occuring in season 2. (Season 2 takes place in college.) • A satisfying conclusion for the characters in both season 1 and season 2. Really, if you only watch season 1 (which I don't recommend, watch the whole thing!) you will probably be just as alright with that as an ending as you would watching both seasons. And season 3 is confirmed, so I think it can really only go up from here. • Fairly realistic character conflicts, including a lack of a "real villain" for any particular plotpoint in the show.

Alright, onto the series itself.

Savannah Reed. Savvy is pretty much the bringer of her own destruction, she has a lot more obvious flaws in this series than the original, but that is absolutely not a bad thing. Savvy is the innocent girl in the beginning, but she's easily corrupted by her own heartbreak and her own experiences with other characters. In a way, Savannah's innocence is what corrupts her. She's really getting a handle on social situations for what seems like the first time, struggling to manage her emotions until they make her act out. She wants Brooke back, she wants her friend back, but that initial rejection from Brooke just makes her so upset. She spirals out of control, getting makeovers, hitting on Sage, dating Sage, and the conflict of season 1 all explodes at the party, sending her further down the tracks of being exactly what hurt her in the first place. Savannah and Brooke almost switch places for the remainder of season 1, and even after their reconciliation, Savvy's self destructive behavior doesn't really seem to end.

Season two for Savannah is particularly heartbreaking because the worst of it all is entirely based on a miscommunication. Briac isn't with Brooke, and the very fact that she doesn't know that sends her to be with Tom. She denies feelings for Brooke, over and over, running from things and inadvertently hurting herself, Tom, and Brooke in the process. Her running away at the end of s2 to be with Brooke was basically the perfect end to the character arc she had in season 2. To end the season where she runs and runs and runs from everything, her final action being running away to Brooke is so fitting.

Brooklyn Hayes. Really, who doesn't love a good mean girl? Brooke herself, apparently. Even from her first full interaction with Savannah in season 1, it was relatively clear to me that she wasn't someone who wanted to hurt anyone, especially not Savannah. Savannah coming to see her is, unfortunately, the thing that breaks down the persona she'd set up for herself. Brooke couldn't stand Savannah being in her school because it means she'd have to accept that she has had feelings for her the whole time. It's especially notable the change she goes through the moment the jig is up, the moment she can't keep her persona up, she changes to a lot more relaxed version of herself, even if she's miserable while she's at it. Season 2 is the same for her, really. She's grown a far meaner persona to keep Savannah at arms length while still being there for her. It's clear the jerkish side of her is either a front, or just not quite her real feelings, because she behaves so much different with Briac. She wants for Briac what she can't have for herself, and yet they both find happiness at the end of season 2. Brooke is a caring character, one that's actually pretty kind once her walls fall down, but she needs those walls, she needs to keep Savannah out, she needs to keep her friends out. Letting anyone in besides Briac is out of the question for her until the last minute, the last weeks before Savannah is married. Even then, even when Savannah knows, even when Savannah confesses the same to her, she lets her go. She doesn't want to push it. And Savvy choosing to push herself to leave is exactly what both of them needed. Brooke is tired of acting, Savannah needs to take the action step instead of letting everything happen to her. And she does.

Tom Dawson. Tom is only introduced in season 2, but he is so, so very major once he's there. I think Tom is an interesting example of how differently the perspective of the audience and the perspective of the characters is. Tom can't know Savannah's thoughts, she never tells him a thing, so he feels like he can love her. Tom is so tired of being seen as someone so famous, someone that people only want for his status, and for Savannah to treat him like a person, it's extremely exciting for him. Tom acts fast, he wants Savannah, the one girl who treats him properly, to stay with him. He jumps the gun with the early proposal, but why wouldn't he? Tom seems so isolated even with so many people that "love" him. It doesn't seem like he has all that many friends, he is just dragged into Savannah's group and we don't see much of him with anyone else. He's kind, he's caring, he listens, but Savannah never tells him anything he needs to hear, never tells him anything she needs to say. And if she did? I think he would be more than understanding, he wants Savannah's happiness. He wants her to be able to have a say in things, he asks at several points if she wants to be with him, and she lies. He's really the only character that doesn't get that conclusive end in the season 2 finale, but I have faith that there will be an expansion on the aftermath once season 3 rolls around.

#brooke hayes #brooklyn hayes #savannah reed #savvy reed #tom dawson #lps #lps popular #lps popular remake #lpsblr

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herearedragons · 4 months

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3, 5, 6, 13, 23 from the video game asks! :)

Thanks for the ask!

video game questions

3. 1-3 games you’ve played in the past 12 months that you really enjoyed

the first Pillars of Eternity game (as evident by how much I've been posting about it) is still great and I 100% recommend it, it is darker fantasy than Dragon Age and there are a couple of Yikes Moments close to the beginning, but you WILL love at least one of your party members and the writing is pretty great. also a lot of its soundtrack was used in season 2 of Critical Role, and there is significant vibe/theme overlap, so if you enjoyed that season you'll probably like something about POE1 (also there are a lot of voices from the cr cast in the game itself. Matt Mercer notoriously voices two(2) of your best friends party members)

Dragon Age: Origins! The OG. The reason I'm even on this website. I had a pretty major reset when I realized that I accidentally locked myself out of Zevran's romance and now I have to do the Sacred Ashes quest again, but once I get through it things will get fun again. I've had a lot of fun writing Kyana meta based on this playthrough earlier this year, and I'm sure I'll have more things to say when I GET OUT OF THAT TEMPLE

I started playing The Sims 4 between writing sessions during NaNo. I made an off-brand Evelyn and another household based on two very old OCs, and I was really invested in them for a while (to the point of considering making fanart of the second household). I stopped playing at some point, but I think that, like Stardew Valley, this is going to be a fun thing to come back to every once in a while.

(the first answer was already very long so I'm putting the rest under the cut)

5. Game(s) coming out that you’re looking forward to

I played the demo for GLITCHED: The RPG a couple of years ago and it's been on my Steam wishlist even since. I don't actually know what's going on with the game (I think it was announced that it would come out in 2023 and then it didn't?), but I really hope that it will come out eventually because the demo is A Lot of my favorite things packed into one game. Like, honestly, even if the game won't be out for a while, I think that the demo itself is a really fun experience.

also, despite everything surrounding Dreadwolf, I'm definitely looking forward to it! though somewhat concerned about actually running the game because I Do Not Think my laptop will be able to handle it.

6. A series you’ve enjoyed since your early days of gaming and still enjoy to this day whether it still has games coming out or is one you return to

.........I mean, this is very much a Dragon Age blog. DA:O was one of my first RPGs (Skyrim was the other) and Here We Are all those years later

13. Quick, name the first song from a game that comes to mind

I haven't actually played it yet, but Challenging A Queen from Stray Gods. I'm definitely going to play it, though, because this is another game that looks like it was made personally For Me. and this song absolutely rules (my favorite version is the first one they played in this video)

23. A “Wow” moment of awe

...technically I didn't play this one either, but I watched a full playthrough of Wandersong on youtube, and the final song sequence I can't really talk about without spoiling everything was. very. Emotional(TM)

also for a more somber kind of awe, I really like the ambience in Emprise du Lion in DA:I and the White March DLC's entire deal in Pillars of Eternity. in both cases the environment made me just kind of pause for a second and take it all in (actually, adding to the song thing, the Abydon's Shell soundtrack from The White March is haunting)

#herearedragons speaks

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onestepbackwards · 1 year

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Hello! I'm normally a ghost reader but I really have to tell you the following; I love your writing! Wholeheartedly! It really makes my day, even my whole week when I read your oneshots/short stories! I'm currently in love with "What's all the buzz about?" and "Our Angel" - the submas twins are sitting rn rentfree in my mind and reading your awesome stories really makes me happy! Also, I really, really love "Love that bites" - I never played Castlevania and never watched it but still; your writing pulled me right in! Now I'm even considering buying one xD (do you have a recommendation?) Anyway! Just wanted to tell you that and wondered when a next part might come - if you don't know/have no idea or don't feel so good bc of health problems, that's fine! Don't pressure yourself and take your time! :) Kind regards crimson anon

Hello Crimson Anon! (o´∀`o)/

Thank you so much for the kind words!! I’m really touched you like my writing 🥰 When I started this blog, I never really thought people would like it this much, so its nice to see messages like this 🥹

I’m glad you enjoying all my stories, and even gave my Castlevania fic a shot!

If you do want to try the games out, there are a few good ones out there to start with!

I first recommend Symphony of the Night. It’s a classic, and redefined the series, and even created the Metroidvania genre with the help of Metroid games!

It was specifically designed to be a Castlevamia game anyone could play. It starts out a little tough if you aren’t sure what to do, but it still considered a gem, and I enjoy playing it. I’d even do daily randomizer runs of it when I still had a computer! This game was a lot if people’s first Castlevania game too!

(Word if advice, if you play it, explore every cranny you can, look at every item description, and there are technically 2 clocktowers. One in the middle if the castle, and one that is an actual tower. The first is a kinda a mistranslation, but if you want the full experience, it’s easier to figure out some things if you know that. The game is deceptively longer than you might think.)

You can get SotN on playstation 4, and on a few other consoles I believe! You can even get it with Rondo of Blood, one of the best Castlevania games before Symphony came out. If you want a more original Castlevania experience, Rondo is the way to go. Symphony is actually a direct sequel to Rondo, but you don’t have to beat Rondo to know what’s going on.

Though if you do get the Rondo + Symphony bundle, Symphony is technically a remaster, with new text and voice acting. A lot if the iconic lines were changed or redone. Its still done nicely, but if you get this version, make sure to look up the original cutscenes on youtube. Dracula’s lines may be memed a bit, but he put his whole non existent soul into those lines, along with Richter. Evil Richter my beloved~

Rondo has some of the best sprite work, level design, and enemies before Symphony, while still being a classic! It technically took a long time for it to get an english release too, and i had a lot if fun with it!

You don’t have to know the overarching story to play Rondo either. Most of the games don’t really require knowledge from previous games.

But if you want to start somewhere based on the story, I recommend Lament of Innocence. Its the first game in the timeline, though you would probably have to emulate it since this was only released in the ps2 i believe.

It’s an amazing game, and plays similar to Devil may cry 1. It has its issues, but i genuinely love it, and it IS first in the timeline.

If you can’t find it, or emulate it, i know some lets plays are on youtube, and one of my favorite streamers has played it as well.

For a beginner, those are the ones I recommend! But honestly, Symphony is probably your best bet. Its casual and fun, and has a good story that a little of the anime was based off of (though the rest was based off of Castlevania 3, but they took lore from symphony too)

If you like symphony, it more or less set the standard of modern castlevania games after that before the reboot. So playing it will help out a bit if you wanna try any others that came out afterwards, most of them on gameboy and ds are pretty good too.

As for my writing, i’m about 2500 words into Love That Bites, and about a 1000 for the next Our Angel! I’ve been working on both instead of one at a time so i can focus on Beemas, and a genshin fic i’ve been planning, and maybe another castlevania fic 👉👈

I try to get all my chapters around 3000 words before i post them. Just a personal goal of mine. If i write more, then great! But i try to write about that much first.

so thats one reason its taking a bit longer than usual, added with the migraines i’ve been fighting for the past few weeks. I’ll try to have those out soon though! Hopefully within a few days!

Thank you so much for reading and enjoying my stuff 🥰💕

#ask #anon #crimson anon #zed.talks #asks like this always almost make me cry from how sweet they are #thank you #long post

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twiststreet · 1 year

Photo

(After all these years, I don’t really understand how/if Tumblr replies work, so I’ll put this off on its own, but) I don’t really follow a lot! I don’t know if I’m America’s #1 Gamer or anything so my tastes are probably extremely vanilla. I mostly watch Youtube recommendations because the algorithm knows me better than I know myself at this point, and it mostly recommends cooking, people drawing, misc. Japan stuff, David Lynch’s weather reports, and stuff about movie directors. That’s pretty much all there is to me, at this point, per Youtube / me-- Youtube’s speaking my truth.

But it’s rare game stuff comes down the transom except once every 5-6 months the Youtube algorithm’s like “Are you sure you don’t hate woke people and love white supremacy, you watched a video about Days Gone to help you get through a hard level, and that’s usually a tell you’ll liike a video of a man who hasn’t showered in 12 weeks talking about hit Playstation game Days Gone” and I have to be like “no, I respect your reasoning, Days Gone is a tell, but i’m good.” That said, what’s coming to mind...

Essayists

For “essays” about games, I’ll watch all 5-10 hours of Tim Rogers without hesitation, the less I know/care about the game/genre the better. That guy’s the only one I think of as being essential. A 13 hour video about that puzzle they hand you at Cracker Barrel that I have to watch in one sitting to get the full effect of? Sure. I’m in.

But I’ll absolutely watch HBomberguy (though my favorite of his isn’t a game thing-- it’s his video about Transformers the Movie). I don’t look to him for recommendations, but I just think there’s something about him where you’re like “oh, that guy’s my pal” as soon as he’s on screen. “My old buddy HBomberguy, which is his name.” I liked his long Fallout video, though I’ve been thinking of going and playing that game despite what sounded like pretty valid criticisms (I only ever played New Vegas, which is plainly the “good one”)...

If I had all the time in the world, I’d watch more Game Maker’s Toolkit and those NoClip documentaries.

Reviewers

I’ll watch a review if I’m debating a game or interested in some title, but I don’t really pay attention to “who they are” the same way, like as people...? I always look at IGN first because it’s going to be the “mainstream” take, and more importantly, their videos are short. It doesn’t take 10 minutes to tell me about a fucking videogame. PC Gamer, after that, if available. That seems like a pretty strong operation over there.

Usually, I watch IGN and then if there’s a “Before You Buy” video from Gameranx.

The guy I avoid is there’s a guy called like The Angry Man Joe or something? And he’s like... the guy who is angry at computer games... for a living? That guy makes me feel sad anytime I’m reminded he exists. I feel like he’s huge in that world, though, he’s the blueprint nowadays is my impression, and so that makes me avoid most Youtubers-- it seems like a lot of people think you have to be fast and loud. I just feel like if you want something quiet and considered and human for games, you have to go to the people doing longer essays, because the “React quick” crowd is like... the videogame wing of the men’s rights movement...?? But I get the economics of why that is, I guess...? The Youtube recommendations always scare me away from investigating deeper, I guess is how I’d put because i just don’t want to feel sad. For men. Not when we can feel happy-for-women in our post-Barbie-teaser-trailer world (I wish they’d showed the movie more, the movie looks fun).

Oh, I don’t watch Skill Up, but if there was a way to just get their “I strongly recommend” videos, I’d watch that. Youtube doesn’t let you carve up your experience though-- sometimes a channel has like a sub-series that I like but you can’t just sign up for the sub-series (or I don’t know how to, anyways).

Play Videos

I mostly don’t watch people playing games, with two big exceptions. One is StealthGamerBR, which is like if the ebola virus were a gamer. It’s watching a guy who just seems better at videogames than the people who make games ever believed would play their games, moving effortlessly and elegantly through play spaces, without any hint of a human’s hesitation, killing everybody (sometimes in ways that I’d really describe as sadistic, if the game gives the player any degree of freedom). Games, you watch “people” die a lot and like, that’s the game, they’re not really “people.” But with StealthGamerBR, I feel bad for the people in the “games.”

The other, and I don’t watch all of his videos, but BigMooney06, who is a guy in the UK who mostly just plays one game, and that game is Hitman. Hitman is a game about moving stealthily through a large crowd of people (mostly innocent bystanders living their lives) in order to find someone who needs to die, killing them, and then escaping without drawing the attention of the crowd. They’re basically puzzles-- kinetic puzzles. But what BigMooney06 asked, and what makes him an innovator, is "what if I killed every single person in this fucking game?” Which the game is not built for-- he very often kills so many people the game breaks-- like 200-500+ people per level, only maybe 50 of whom are armed, the rest who are just innocent victims of a cackling UK Youtuber.

But if everyone besides Tim Rogers went up in a puff of smoke tomorrow, I wouldn’t be too put out.

#Man is the Deadliest Game.#Youtube Gives Me Feelings.

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stevetown · 2 years

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Silent Hill

Completed: 10/12/2022

Playtime: 4h 30m

Where has Silent Hill been all my life? I had never finished the first game in the series when I picked it up almost fifteen years ago, making it as far as the hospital level before giving up on the tank controls. I had marked this Halloween season over a year ago as the year of Silent Hill (long before the recently announced revival), and my Steam Deck gave me the perfect couch/emulation experience that I needed.

Silent Hill is probably one of the best PlayStation 1 games in existence, full stop. I was consistently impressed by the production values for a PSX game, from the industrial sound design that feels like it came out of Trent Reznor's nightmares, to the way the lighting had a way of making the dark hallways feel so - well - so damn dark. I was spooked!

I even found the controls not all that hard to wrangle. I got used to the tank controls pretty quickly and came to love how the camera could swivel behind Harry with the push of a button, always seeming to land in the most cinematic spot.

It just felt great to play and I can understand how the game must have made kids lose their minds back in the day. The stripped down, blurry monster design of the era and heavy mist contributed to an aesthetic that later consoles would fill in with too much detail, spawning an entire sub-aesthetic all to its own.

youtube

Oh yeah, I also got the Bad Ending which just kinda...ends. I had to watch the canonical ending on YouTube before starting Silent Hill 3

#silent hill #playstation #psx #haunted ps1 #harry mason #2022 game journal

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memryse · 2 years

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Last Life Propaganda: a guide for people with absolutely no idea what they're getting into

Have you ever wondered what on earth is wrong with your Last Life mutuals? Seen Last Life SMP trending #1 and become greatly concerned about why your dash is on fire every Tuesday? Considered checking it out, but don't know anyone involved or where to start or how or even what Last Life is?

Basically, this is a propaganda/FAQ post for people who've never seen a minute of Hermitcraft/Empires/adjacent content in their lives, and have no idea how to get into Last Life. Because God knows I wish I'd had a post like this answering all my questions when I was getting into this series completely blind.

Now is the best time to get into Last Life if you want to experience any of it live, because unfortunately it's looking like the series will be drawing to a close within the next couple of weeks. Luckily, it won't take you very long to catch up!

1. What even is Last Life?

Last Life is a hardcore Minecraft miniseries on YouTube, featuring a bunch of Hermitcraft and Empires SMP members and a few extra friends. Each member starts off with a random amount of lives between 2 and 6. On your final life (your red life), you're not only allowed but encouraged to kill other players. Each week also has "boogeymen" chosen at random from the non-red players, who have to sneakily get a kill Among Us-style. Even if it sounds complicated, I promise you it's not hard to follow in the videos, and there's a handy little tutorial in the first episode explaining it all anyway. The server also has proximity chat (no Discord calls allowed) and a small world border to make sure everyone is stuck near each other.

Last Life is the sequel to 3rd Life, which was a very similar concept but every player started off with exactly three lives and there were no boogeymen.

Basically, if you like death game media, you'll love it. You'll probably also love it if you're not usually a fan of death game media. It's just really good. I love Last Life.

2. Do I need to have seen 3rd Life to watch Last Life?

No, not technically! I would certainly recommend it though, because 3rd Life is an absolute masterpiece of a series. Also, because it's a miniseries, you can watch it in a relatively short amount of time - I would personally recommend Grian's, which will take you just under four hours altogether. Best enjoyed if you binge it all in one sitting, but it's fun and will leave you feeling somewhat empty inside regardless! :D

But, again, it's not required. You just won't understand the 3rd Life references in Last Life.

3. How/where do I watch Last Life?

All Last Life content is available on YouTube. There is no livestream content to catch up on - all videos are recorded in "sessions". Basically, every Friday, everyone logs on for a 3 hour period and records the full thing. That's the only time that they play on the server, and it makes sure that everyone is online the whole time. Lots of interactions to be had!

4. Which POV should I watch?

There are no "bad" POVs for Last Life - everyone is heavily involved in one server event or another every session. It's a really action-packed series. You can theoretically pick any member and go. That being said, here are some of my top recommendations:

Mumbo Jumbo is probably the best for newcomers: he's new to Last Life, having not been in 3rd Life, his episodes are a reasonable length and great fun to watch, and he's been pretty heavily involved in the main conflicts on the server.

GoodTimesWithScar has absolutely fantastic storytelling skills and is easily one of the most entertaining POVs to watch (if not the most). However, he wasn't in the most recent session due to some health problems, so you'd have to pick a different POV for this session.

If you're only looking for a short POV for a trial run, I'd say to check out LDShadowLady or Smallishbeans. Both of them like to keep their episodes short but full of action. Personally, long episodes are the way to go, because the beauty of Last Life is in all its dialogue, but these two are great if you're not quite sure about committing to the series just yet (or if you just prefer shorter videos! that's also cool!)

5. I don't know any of the members, what do I do?

Genuinely, it does not matter! Whether you've been following Hermitcraft for the last decade or this is the first you're even hearing that name, Last Life is equally enjoyable. I can vouch for this; I got into 3rd Life having only seen a couple of Scott's streams and nothing else. I've also gotten multiple (10+) of my friends who aren't familiar with any of the CCs to watch it, and every single one has been blown away by how much they enjoyed it. So, trust me, it's worth checking out :)

6. Does Last Life have lore?

Last Life has a pretty interesting approach to its storytelling: with it being in a 3 hour session format, it is completely improvised. People will have vague ideas of what they want to do each session at best; no events are planned in advance, nothing is scripted. If you need a DSMP comparison, it's pretty much like very early S1 - Disc War or very early L'Manburg era, where they're roleplaying to some extent but not playing fully fleshed out characters (other than a couple of members who are just really dramatic and roleplay constantly anyway). It does require reading into things a little to make them as dramatic as we do, but it's all great fun!

TL;DR: Watch Last Life, it's really good, it'll fill the void in your heart and then tear an even deeper one moments later :D

#last life smp #last life #watch last life guys please please please

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becomingbts · 3 years

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Time heals (sometimes) - 1

Summary: 6 years ago, (Y/N) thought that she was finally taking her life into her hands, leaving behind a toxic and abusive relationship with a man who taught her she’d never be worthy of love. However, it became hard to ignore his words when she met her seven soulmates who rejected her without even giving her a chance to prove herself. It took (Y/N) 3 years to realize that it wouldn’t be her end. She would live on to prove them all wrong; she would become what they all thought she wasn’t: someone worthy of love. And as she stands proudly on the stage, under the burning spotlights and the applause and the cries of the delirious crowd, she feels alive. Alive, just like the bond she believed to be broken.

Pairings: Y/N x OT7

GENRE: Soulmate AU!, Idol Y/NAU!, semi social-media AU!, ANGST (mainly), fluff, romance, maybe smut in the series.

Ask or comment to be tagged!

1.5k

Warnings: The series is going to be heavy with a lot of personal experiences mixed into the fiction, so this is going to be kind of therapeutic for me. Please, consider not reading the series if you are not comfortable with: abandonment issues, anxiety, panic attacks, depression, self-harm (not descriptive and only part of MC’s past), suicide thoughts (in the past), toxic behavior, toxic and abusive relationship (in the past), depreciating self-talk and low self-esteem, a lot of curse, physical and mental pain, near death experience situation (in the past), and maybe smut scenes (happy ending though, but it will probably be quite the ride).

NOTE: So hello everyone, welcome to Time Heals (sometimes). Thank you so, so much for the warm welcoming, it has been my first time getting so many asks, I was honestly overjoyed. I still don’t really know what to call this part; is it a teaser? A note? A full chapter? I believe we’ll get some snapshot of memories like this one throughout the series because there is going to be a lot to unpack on both sides. I think it will be a chapter nevertheless because I have to establish some kind of order as to which parts should be read first, and I think this one is extremely important.

Thank you for reading,

-Dolly

Profiles #2 - here - part 2

Her scream pierced through the air while cries broke in the frenzied arena while a single blond-haired man froze, emptily staring at the stage. It felt like his senses heightened; his skin was shuddering, his eyes were frantically searching for one specific figure while his voice was lost in his throat. The screams resonating in the stadium would have been too loud for his voice to be heard anyway.

Jimin knew he shouldn’t be there.

Namjoon had told them more than once that none of them should try to go to one of (Y/N)’s events. It could be dangerous and they could be overwhelmed; anything could happen to them and they would still remain a nobody who fainted in the howling crowd. Would they want to take this risk? No.

So, Jimin would have had to admit that going to her very first concert in Seoul since the pandemic sounded like a very, very, very bad idea. And to be honest, it still didn’t seem to be a bright idea now that he was actually there.

But he still went because he needed to see her for himself; to see how she was. He had so many things he dreamed about asking her. Are you okay? Are you sleeping well? Did you eat before coming to the arena? Are you nervous? Do you... remember me?

Maybe he was torturing himself. He kept on watching her lives, following her on all social media, always made sure to leave a sweet comment, and never miss any of her new updates... Maybe he even had a folder of pictures of her on his phone but he’d never admit it to any of his mates. Taehyung would probably take his phone away from him and delete everything and Jimin couldn’t let that happen.

He felt like it was cheating. Don’t take him wrong though. When he thought that, he was not really thinking about the boys. They did collectively agree not to follow her activities as an artist but it was getting harder and harder with how popular she got anyway. Moon was everywhere. In commercials, on the radio, her songs were on the TV… Even if she was known for refusing most of the promotional contracts that were offered to her, her image was still constantly in the media despite her avoidance of it. Ironic, but the media were trying their best to find anything about her, be it positive or negative. One day she was seen on her bike, the next, she was in a coffee shop, and it kept on going on, overstepping on her privacy as if it was just a meaningless word.

The lockdown had admittedly played a major part in Jimin’s obsession. Being in their apartment meant quickly running out of activities, and his job as a dance teacher was not really filling his free time (a lot of his classes were also canceled). It was also during that time that (Y/N) truly blew up as an independent artist. Advertisement on YouTube started being around her channel and her music, the recommendations he kept on seeing were about also her… Jimin’s resolve honestly broke easily. It was hard not to be curious about his lost soulmate even though he didn’t feel like he had the right to be hurting.

Anyway, to come back to his main point, if Jimin felt like he was cheating; it was mostly for her. After all, (Y/N) had no means of letting the curiosity get the best of her, to know what they were doing; to simply see or contact them. He had, at first, not really thought about that. Watching her content seemed a very innocent thing to do in his opinion; billions of people were watching her content, why should he prevent himself from doing so? Yet, Jimin could still remember one of her live she did soon after that interview she had given on this damned radio show where she had revealed who her title track ‘TIME’ was about… She had gone live the next day-Jimin had jumped on his phone because of the notification-and one fan had asked her what would she do if she knew that her ‘ex-soulmates’ (and those words left a very sour taste in Jimin’s mind) were watching her. The question had silenced a previously restless Jimin, replacing his initial excitation with dread while a lump formed itself in his throat. He had not even noticed it; he was so focused on her live and her upcoming answer that Jimin had completely missed the sound of a glass breaking in the apartment. Jimin had been home alone, so even if had indeed heard it, he probably wouldn’t have bothered to check what had happened, thinking that the wind knocked it over or something. Jimin had been so absorbed by what he had been watching that he even got surprised a few hours later when Seokjin came home and yelled at him for breaking something when he had been clearly innocent, engrossed in (Y/N)’s live (not that he could tell his soulmates about that part, but yeah). (Y/N)’s live would always be more important than some random glass breaking again in their apartment. Every object was doomed with Namjoon living here anyway.

On her side of the screen though, (Y/N) had seemed taken aback as she had read the question and had gritted her teeth gently. She had seemed to be pondering about her answer even though a lot of people in her chat were telling her to forget about the question if it made her uncomfortable (a lot were even scolding the person who asked). Yet, sighing softly, she had looked up at the screen:

“I’d appreciate it if you could refrain from asking questions on this topic. It’s not taboo but I’d rather not remember everything that comes with it. However, to answer this-hopefully-last question about it, I’d ask them to turn off my stream and to stop watching any of my content. It would only be fair after all. I’ve been denied access to their lives six years ago, why would they get a free pass into mine now?” She had not smiled nor had she seemed hurt by her own comment, yet Jimin’s heart had shattered in pieces, unable to press the cancel button.

Her voice had slowly faded into background noise while her words had been stuck in his head.

I’d ask them to turn off my stream and to stop watching any of my content.

How could Jimin ever do that? He realized that he truly should. Namjoon would even agree with you, as ironic as it sounded for Jimin. Namjoon had been one of the most adamant ones about rejecting your bond, after all. Jimin was shaking with bitterness while ‘Moon’ continued her stream peacefully with music. Jimin could only try to gulp his anger down as he remembered her crumbling features on that fateful day.

“You’re not our soulmates. This name on our arms means nothing to us. You are nothing to us if not a hindrance. Leave us alone.”

If Jimin could go back in time, he’d prevent Taehyung from spatting those words at her. Yet, he couldn’t do anything. Playing the scene over and over in his mind wouldn’t change anything. It wouldn’t change that she probably hated them. It wouldn’t change the song she made about them.

And worst of all, it wouldn’t change the fact that Jimin had let himself believe that their choice had been for the best, trying to console and reassure himself, even if he had already known that it was wrong. Tears were pooling up in his eyes even if none escaped as he finally caught a glimpse of her on the stage. Suddenly brought back to reality after his subconscious memory trip, Jimin finally connected back to the world, looking around while he was still frozen on his spot. People were still screaming around him and he wondered if he looked like an intruder. Because, after all, wasn’t that what he exactly was? She said it herself that she didn’t wish for them to watch her; so what was he doing here?

Jimin couldn’t help but stare; she looked ethereal, dressed like a queen in the middle of a sold-out arena. People were screaming her name as she yelled her infamous ‘hi people’. It was an opening sentence that Jimin heard way too many times in her vlogs and suddenly hearing it in real life seemed surreal.

Jimin could only watch in awe, entranced with her everything.

Screw the boys and what they would think once he’d be back from her concert.

He had been the one to find her six years ago anyway. He had been the one to bring her to their home six years ago, hoping for the boys to change their mind once they’d meet her.

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Uploaded : 09/04/2021

Taglist: @sweetmoonlight9, @mickmoon, @dreamer95, @loveyoongles, @spicetouched , @jikooksgirl19, @summerevelyn , @springjade , @clevercoley, @prooteus, @sehun096rainbow, @ainsle-e, @ifyouareme, @sunshinee0-0, @fangirl125reader, @sea-nevermind-enthusiast, @atlantis-atlas, @thequeen-kat, @naajix, @skyys-universe , @sichajeon , @yukiehyukie, @amxranthinesworld , @bunzom, @potate-oh, @mawwnsterr, @ celaenaelentiyavox, @dvoz-writes , @honeybaby-94 ,

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septembercfawkes · 3 years

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Principles of the Steadfast, Flat-arc Protagonist

Last week I debunked six myths about the steadfast (also known as the flat-arc) character. Now, I would like to share 6 principles of writing a positive steadfast protagonist.

Steadfast/flat-arc characters are characters who don't drastically change their worldviews over the course of the story. In contrast, a change character will do largely a 180 flip in worldview from the beginning of the story to the end of the story.

For example, in Wonder Woman, Diana begins the story with the perspective that we should fight for the world we believe in. At the end of the story, she proves that true by using it to defeat the antagonist (this helps make up the story's theme). But in Frozen, Elsa begins the story with the worldview that one must be closed off to be safe and authentic. Because of the story, she learns that, actually, we must be open to be loved authentically (that might mean we get hurt, but some love is worth the hurt). This enables her to set things right, which proves that perspective true (and helps make up the story's theme).

Both flat-arc characters and change characters have negative versions: a character who remains steadfast to an inaccurate worldview and suffers punishment for it, and a character who changes from a true worldview to an inaccurate one and suffers punishment for it. Negative versions of each type are harder to find, but not nonexistent.

Almost all protagonists are positive change-arc protagonists. This means that almost all writing resources help writers write positive change-arc protagonists. This also means there are very few resources to help writers write steadfast protagonists.

You often can't apply change-arc advice to steadfast characters. It doesn't work.

Luckily, whichever protagonist type you're writing, each story actually has pretty much the same structural pieces--they're just arranged differently. Some are reversed while others receive more emphasis.

Today I'm going to explain how these pieces are different for a positive steadfast protagonist story, in comparison to the common positive change protagonist story.

This is a little like being left-handed in a right-handed world. That's it--the steadfast protagonists are the lefties of the storytelling world.

First, I would like to acknowledge those in the industry who have helped me understand the flat-arc protagonist and therefore influenced this post. If you want to learn more about this protagonist, check out these resources:

K. M. Weiland's Character Arc Series (Katie is amazing and this is honestly the best resource I've found so far on flat-arc characters.)

Character Arcs by Jordan McCollum (This book has a brief section on the flat arc.)

"Character Arcs 102: Flat Arcs" at The Novel Smithy (Lewis succinctly breaks down the flat-arc protagonist's three-act structure.)

Dramatica Theory (I already mentioned last week how Dramatica uses the term "steadfast" instead of "flat arc")

Writing Characters Without Character Arcs by Just Write (Youtube video)

I'll also be doing more posts on this protagonist type in the future.

1. Reversing Orientation: Change <--> Steadfast

Despite being the "lefties," almost every story will feature a key flat-arc character, like I mentioned last week:

In stories that have a change protagonist, the steadfast character will be the Influence Character. The Influence Character is typically someone the protagonist has an important relationship with, especially through the middle of the story. This is usually a love interest, mentor, or sidekick, but it can be almost anything. Of course, there are variations to the Influence Character, and you can learn more about them in my article on them. The Influence Character also serves as a thematic opponent, to some degree.

Why is the change protagonist most commonly paired with a steadfast character?

Dramatica Theory argues that it's because in order for a story to feel "complete" or "whole"--to properly mimic the human experience--we need to witness each perspective. Otherwise, it feels like something is missing.

It's not impossible to have a change protagonist be paired up with another change character, it's just that when this happens, usually an outsider who is steadfast gets involved and becomes the real Influence Character for both of them. It's also not impossible for the "Influence Character" to be more than one person. A story may have multiple Influence Characters, or even have a group that functions as the Influence Character.

In a story that features a flat-arc protagonist, the types are reversed. The Influence Character becomes a change character:

Moana is steadfast while Maui is change.

In Arrival, Louise Banks is steadfast while Ian is change.

In Cinderella, Ella is steadfast while the prince is change.

In Princess Mononoke, Ashitaka is steadfast while San is change.

In Wonder Woman, Diana is steadfast while Steve is change. (Steve's change isn't as drastic, but if you watch, he moves from disbeleiving the world Diana talks about, to believing in it.)

Usually, this pairing is positive steadfast protagonist and positive change Influence Character. This means that the Influence Character will usually start on the inaccurate worldview--the opposing side of the thematic argument. They will at least voice or tap into it in some way. By the end, they will have an accurate worldview, adopting the steadfast protagonist's perspective.

Generally speaking, anyway, as there are of course exceptions and variations.

So in a sense, when working with a steadfast protagonist, you are reorienting the structure to focus on the steadfast character, instead of the change one.

2. Inaccurate Worldview: Within <--> Without

The positive change protagonist has an inaccurate worldview in the beginning--this is sometimes referred to as the "lie" (as K. M. Weiland says it), "misbelief" (as Lisa Cron says it), or "flaw." He will overcome this on his journey and embrace the accurate worldview--the "truth." The truth is also the thematic statement.

The positive steadfast protagonist has the "truth," the accurate worldview, the thematic statement, from the beginning. This means that the inaccurate worldview needs to come from outside them. They need to encounter it in the environment.

You need to have the inaccurate worldview present. Otherwise, there is no opposing argument, no moral conflict.

A theme is essentially an argument about how we live our lives. You can't win an argument if no one is disagreeing. Someone needs to oppose the truth--I like to think of this opposition as the anti-theme. It is essentially the "lie," "misbelief," or "flaw." It is the worldview that is proven wrong by the end of the story.

It's just that with the flat-arc protagonist, that will hit them more from the outside. They will either:

- Enter a society run by the inaccurate worldview

- Have the inaccurate worldview enter their society

- Already live in a society riddled with the inaccurate worldview

Remember, a "society" is simply a collective--it can be as small as a school club or as big as a global government.

I don't know for sure that it always has to be a collective, but even if it's primarily an individual, the inaccurate worldview will still be within the surrounding characters--so in a sense, still part of the environment and society.

In Arrival, Louise is quickly surrounded by people who don't value or understand communication, or how it can avoid confrontation. She does. But she has to put up with that opposition and convince others to share her perspective.

In Princess Mononoke, a demonic boar full of hate and rage enters Ashitaka's peaceful society. After killing it, Ashitaka must journey far away to a land ruled by hate--where he is the only person who stands for peace.

In Wonder Woman, Diana must leave her society behind and enter a world war where humankind doesn't simply fight for a better world, but actively kills the innocent.

Rather than the protagonist transforming within, the positive steadfast protagonist will transform those around them, making the environment a better place as they hold steadfast to the true, accurate, worldview.

3. Internal Journey: Changed vs. Challenged

There is sometimes this idea, this . . . inaccurate worldview 😉 in the writing community that steadfast protagonists can't have rich internal journeys. As someone who loves the internal journey the best out of the plotlines, and who loves many steadfast protagonists the best, I don't find this to be true. Some of the most emotional internal journeys I've experienced, have come from positive steadfast protagonists. And one doesn't have to look far to find examples: The story of Jesus in the New Testament has moved whole nations.

It's fair to say that some steadfast protagonists don't have much of an internal plotline, like classic Superman or 007, but that has more to do with structuring plotlines than it does with character arcs.

For the change protagonist, the internal journey will largely be about transformation--a change. It's a journey to become a better person, and that can be a rich journey indeed.

For the steadfast protagonist, the internal journey will be a test of their beliefs--a challenge. It's a journey about ultimately choosing to hold strong in what you believe in, even if it seems the whole world is against you, (and for a steadfast protagonist journey, that's probably a good idea).

In a strange way, though, these two internal journeys are two sides of the same coin. After all, the change protagonist believes his worldview is the accurate worldview--that's why he has it! He doesn't believe, or at least doesn't clearly see, that he needs to change. The obstacles of the plot will reveal to him he could be wrong, that he needs to fix something about himself. Similarly, the steadfast protagonist believes she's right, and the obstacles of the plot will challenge that by suggesting she could be wrong and needs to bend to the opposing force.

One might argue that the main difference, then, is that the positive change protagonist succeeds at the end by changing, and that the positive steadfast protagonist succeeds at the end by not changing. But I think most of us would agree it'd be more helpful if we differentiated them a little more.

Because the transformation aspect is missing from the steadfast character, it becomes arguably more important to nail the other features of the internal journey. It's not that those features don't exist in the change journey, it's just that without the change itself, they carry more weight and become more centre stage (generally speaking).

One of the aspects that becomes critical, is that the steadfast protagonist needs to pay a high cost. If having an accurate worldview and using it to change the world around them is about as difficult as a stroll in the park, it can become annoying fast. Real life just isn't like that. Even when we are doing good, we still experience hardship, suffering, and opposition. If the steadfast protagonist doesn't have to pay a cost, then they're not really having their beliefs tested.

While a change protagonist's pain may come more from being wrong and having to change--in a sense being "punished" for being wrong--a steadfast protagonist's pain will come from being right and suffering for it, and having to remain true despite that. Essentially they embody the adage, "No good deed goes unpunished."

For example, in Princess Mononoke, in Ashitaka's quest to bring peace to a world at war, Ashitaka must endure a bullet, stabbing, and face death. He's no one's enemy, but he sometimes gets treated as one. He would likely suffer less if he just joined the war efforts and embraced the inaccurate worldview, or if he simply left. Likewise, Jesus holding true to his beliefs in the New Testament, led to him being crucified.

As the obstacles of the plot mount, the steadfast protagonist will be asked to doubt their worldview. Some steadfast protagonists entertain doubt more than others. This may lead to the protagonist wavering in his or her beliefs. Ashitaka entertains doubt only a little, while in Wonder Woman, Diana is brought to her knees by doubt, nearly turning her back on her beliefs. Doubt will usually be strongest at the end of the middle--what some call "The Ordeal," which will lead into the “All is Lost” and "Dark Night of the Soul" moments.

Often, in order for this to work well, the opposing argument needs to appear valid. It needs to look as if the inaccurate worldview could actually be the accurate worldview. It needs to look like the anti-theme could actually be the theme. Like the "lie" could actually be the "truth." This means it becomes perhaps even more important, for you as the writer, to show the legitimate strength of the opposing perspective. If it's obvious the theme is the "truth," then there is no need for the protagonist to experience doubt. There isn't even a need to have a thematic argument. The protagonist may also (or sometimes, instead) doubt his ability or worthiness to live and spread the truth. For more on the power of doubt with flat-arc characters, check out K. M. Weiland's article "Why Doubt is the Key to Flat Character Arcs."

Like costs, stakes become more critical. Stakes are potential consequences. They put pressure on the protagonist and give their choices meaning. If sticking to their worldview means they must suffer steep consequences, their actions carry more weight. It's easy to do what is right when you have nothing to lose. If I found a lost dog, it would be easy for me to look at its tags and return it to its owner. If I found a mean dog trying to bite my hand the evening before my piano recital, wrangled it, saw it belonged to my worst enemy, and still chose to return it--that reveals just how committed I am to saving those lost.

The steadfast protagonist needs to be challenged and tested--one of the best ways to do that is to raise the stakes. Raise them high enough to get them to hesitate, to doubt, to pay a steep cost. In a rich internal journey, we want to push the steadfast protagonist to her limits. What is it going to take to get your protagonist to consider the opposing side? To tempt her to give up her beliefs? In a sense, through the middle, we are really throwing temptations at the protagonist, trying to get her to give in to the opposing argument. Sometimes the most powerful way to do this, is to give the protagonist conflicting wants.

In reality, the audience can't fully see just how steadfast the protagonist is, if she doesn't have to suffer costs, legitimate doubts, and high stakes. It's only in the face of adversity, can we measure true character.

That is the meat of the steadfast protagonist's inner journey.

* I would like to add just one warning, however. In your quest to make your steadfast protagonist struggle, it's important he or she still has some victories along the way. Just as it becomes annoying if the steadfast protagonist never has to struggle, it can also become annoying if the steadfast protagonist never has any success.

4. Ghost/Wound: Inaccurate Belief <--> Accurate Belief

(This is a repeat section from last week. I just thought it would be helpful to have all these elements on the same post.)

A "ghost" is a past, significant, often traumatic event that motivates the character to adopt an inaccurate worldview (the "anti-theme" or the "lie" or the "misbelief"--depending on your preferred terminology). In the industry, this is also sometimes called a "wound." You can learn all about ghosts/wounds in my article, "Giving Your Protagonist a Ghost."

But in a positive steadfast protagonist, this is often flipped. The ghost is often a past, significant, sometimes traumatic event that motivates the character to adopt the accurate worldview (the "theme" or the "truth" if you prefer).

For example, Cinderella's mother, while on her deathbed, tells Cinderella to always be kind. This motivates Cinderella to do just that.

Of course, not every character will have a ghost addressed in the story.

For the positive steadfast protagonist, the ghost may be largely resolved.

But not always. They may not have complete closure and peace. And it's possible they are still traumatized by the event.

Sometimes adhering to what is true can be nearly as haunting as having regrets. It's just that the haunting will come from either the cost of the truth, or, a lack of power--a lack of control--during the ghost. Generally speaking anyway.

In The X-Files, Fox Mulder, in the overall story and theme, is a positive steadfast character. The ongoing theme is an argument of belief vs. disbelief. (The motifs, "I want to believe" and "The truth is out there" speak to that.) However, Mulder has an unresolved, traumatizing ghost: his little sister was abducted by aliens.

This event cements him to the thematic truth of belief and motivates him to investigate anything unnatural. But this happened at the cost of his sister.

Sometimes the trauma comes from not being able to do anything, just as Mulder was powerless to stop the abduction.

Other times it may come from not being able to stop a loved one from choosing the inaccurate worldview--the "lie," "anti-theme," or "misbelief." The steadfast character may be haunted by the outcome of someone else choosing the lie.

5. Want vs. Need <--> I Want the Need

For all other character arcs, what the character wants and what the character needs will be two different things. You can learn about want vs. need in depth here.

In a positive change arc, the protagonist will want something that will manifest in concrete goals, which helps make up the plot of the story. Elsa wants to live in isolation to be herself, so she runs away and creates an ice castle (accidentally freezing the kingdom in the process). The need will be a realization that is thematic--it will be the thematic statement. Elsa needs to learn to be open to love to be authentic--that's what will actually solve her problems.

For the positive steadfast protagonist, the want and the need will be more closely aligned. The protagonist wants what is needed. In a sense, he starts the story with the need. However, the need still has to be applied to the concrete world, which isn't necessarily easy. In a sense, we are taking the need that is within, and trying to apply it to the "real world," which is without. For example, if I know I need to exercise to be healthy, then I probably also want to do that. But that means I still need to put in the work. It also doesn’t mean I know everything about the process--because I may not have full experience with it. I might need to learn a new skill, like how to swim properly.

In Moana, Moana already knows who she is on the inside (thematic statement)--she knows she and her people are meant to sail--but she still has to learn how to sail.

Ashitaka knows the world needs peace, but he doesn't know how to make peace happen within a war. He knows how to have an inner peace, but he doesn't know how to make the external world--the societies around him--peaceful. He's trying to figure it out along the way. He's trying to figure out how to apply a personal experience to the public environment.

The protagonist may still need a greater, more complete understanding of the need, the theme, and how to properly apply it to the real world. We all want to solve world hunger--but how do we actually do that?

On top of that, as the protagonist struggles to meet the need, you may want to tempt him with a conflicting want. In Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man 2, Peter Parker both wants what is needed (to be a self-sacrificing hero) and wants a personal want (to live an ordinary life with Mary Jane Watson). This creates inner turmoil. (And also gives more meat to the internal journey.)

As tests and doubts get heavy, the other want may appear more "right" and enticing. It will almost certainly appear easier.

As tests and doubts get heavy, the flat-arc protagonist may lose sight of the need. In Wonder Woman's "All is Lost" moment, Diana doesn't want to fight for the world she believes in anymore. The world doesn't deserve it. She loses sight of the need, the theme.

In short, the struggle comes from trying to apply the need, being tempting with another want, and/or losing sight of the need.

6. Protagonist Changes <--> Cast Changes

I touched on this earlier, but it's worth giving its own section.

In many positive change protagonist stories, the protagonist will change to the worldview some of the cast members around him have. In Spider-verse, Miles Morales must learn to persevere like the other spider people around him.

In many flat-arc protagonist stories, the cast around the protagonist will change their worldviews to match hers. Moana's journey changes not only Maui's understanding of himself, but Te Fiti's, and everyone's on the island as well.

In some flat-arc stories, this can be critical at the "All is Lost" moment, because if the protagonist is suffering serious doubt, the supporting cast can bolster her by now acting on the accurate worldview, which is essentially what happens in Wonder Woman. As Diana crumbles under doubt, all of her team members enter the fray, prepared to die to make the world a better place. Their selfless sacrifices wake her up, and she recommits to the theme, finding the strength to take on Ares.

Some stories may emphasize these changes more than others, but pretty much always, the Influence Character will at least experience a noticeable change--usually demonstrated near the same place in structure that the change protagonist will change.

But applying the steadfast protagonist to story structure will be for another day (hopefully in the coming weeks). Stay tuned!

#writing tips #writing tips and tricks #writeblr #fanfic #nanowrimo #writing reference #writing advice #protagonist #steadfast protagonist #flat-arc protagonist #moana #arrival #princess mononoke #wonder woman #character #character arcs #writing help

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thepalestrose · 2 years

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A Year and a Day of Incorrect Quotes

Today marks one year and one day since my first incorrect quote post, which effectively marked my entrance into the FNDM.

I'm grateful for everyone who's come to my blog and enjoyed the stuff I post. I love it here on tumblr, and it really is one of those places I wished I had discovered sooner.

Rambling self-reflection regarding my experience with RWBY below, a candid look at how and why it's impacted my life, and my best attempt at explaining why it means so much to me. Consider yourself warned.

I started this blog cause I wanted to get involved in the FNDM, to give something back to the show that has given me so much. Before watching RWBY I had never touched tumblr, or fandoms, or fanfiction or anything even remotely similar.

Now, I find myself feeling more at home here in the RWBY FNDM then anywhere else, I write RWBY fanfiction (insert shameless plug for my pollination endgame time-travel fix-it where the brother gods each send back one character and they have to fix everything while the world around them slowly becomes different then the one they remember - One Never Steps Foot In The Same River Twice), and I run this blog. It's kind of crazy, actually. Crazy, most of all, because if you had told me about any of it just a couple years ago, I wouldn't have believed you. More than that, if you had explained what RWBY was about, I probably wouldn't have even wanted to watch it.

I found RWBY through youtube recommending volume 1 as a "free movie with ads" (lol nice try but adblock exists) back in December 2020, while volume 8 was airing. I knew nothing about the show or RT, and just clicked it cause it was the end of the workday and I wanted something to unwind with. I'd seen anime before, but hadn't watched any in a while.

I laughed at the silly jokes, enjoyed the charm that the early animation had, and generally didn't think much about what I was watching. Volume 1 ended, and I figured, what the heck, I'll watch volume 2 tomorrow. So I did.

I distinctly remember Oobleck questioning the girls during their mission to Mountain Glenn being the first time I really stopped and realized this show had potential. Still, I laughed at the jokes and enjoyed the 2nd volume. When the breach happened, I kinda wondered if this was the type of show that wouldn't have "consequences."

Then volume 3 came.

Unfortunately I was spoiled regarding Pyrrha's fate by youtube comments, but Ruby's eyes still took me completely by surprise. The end of volume 3 was the point at which I knew I'd finish the series. I just had to know what happened next.

Volumes 4-8 are, frankly, a bit of a daze for me. I obsessively watched the show. I ended up going from starting the show to finishing up to where volume 8 had aired in like.. 5 weekdays (on top of working full time).

Usually when I watch something, I tend to be quite expressive. I laugh at its jokes (no matter how bad they are), I make jokes (even if they can't hear me), I poke fun at it, and all around just enjoy it. Not with RWBY. I progressively got quieter and quieter until I was watching the show in complete silence, utterly motionless as I stared at the screen with an intensity I hadn't known I could possess.

It was... an extremely unsettling experience. It was while watching volume 6 that it finally hit me that this wasn't going to go on forever. Eventually I would hit the end. The thought filled me with inexplicable dread. A day later, I did hit the end.

I remember just sitting there, so unsure of what had just happened. I already knew that this show was different, but I wasn't even close to being able to say why. It was an inexplicable feeling that would last for months. So, I did the only thing I could think of, and went right back to watching the first episode of volume 1 again.

Before I get into why RWBY connected with me so much, I have to take a step back. I build my identity around the media I consume. I can pretty accurately track my personality development from high school through college through six different works of media. Each taught me something essential about myself and how I view the world, whether it was how to love myself, or how I am absolutely terrible at handling grief, or how I believed that everyone is inherently selfish (and that's not a bad thing). Little did I realize that RWBY had just become the seventh work that would in time become more important than all the rest combined.

I'm confident that in 10 years, I will look back at the day that I watched RWBY as one of, if not the most, important day of my life. RWBY has touched every facet of my identity and become the dominant thread of my entire life. As I write this, I sit here listening to the RWBY volume 8 soundtrack, wearing a Team RWBY shirt, with a RWBY volume 6 poster on my wall, typing on my RWBY blog, looking at my 2nd monitor which has a RWBY background, with my youtube recommendations almost entirely RWBY (that, or obscure history videos), with several open tabs for RWBY fanfiction, the RWBY wiki, the RWBY page on the shipping wiki (I didn't even know shipping existed before watching RWBY), and of course RWBY itself on the RT website (because I am in a continual state of rewatching RWBY and started volume 2 again today).

And that's just what is within arm's reach.

Before watching RWBY, I couldn't have told you what it means to be non-binary, now I am non-binary. Same with ace, and panromantic. RWBY fanfiction was instrumental in introducing me into that world (and is also where I learned what transgender meant). RWBY's affected my political views, my outlook on life, the ideals and core values that I hold dear. It's changed how I want to live my life and what I think is most important in it.

This is by no means a complete list. A complete list would be twice the length of this entire post.

So, how on earth did it do all that???

For months I struggled with that question. I knew that RWBY was different, that it was important, but I couldn't even begin to put any words to why that was. I didn't have any answer to it. Now, I realize there are lots of answers.

I remember discussing the show a week after I watched it with my best friend. She asked what I liked about it, and all I could come up with is "I don't know." Was it the writing? No, the writing was just okay, I said (I was a fool, the writing is fucking PHENOMINAL and I was just too awestruck to see it yet). Was it this, was it that? No, no and no.

Eventually I was struck by (my first) revelation, but to explain why it was so revolutionary, I have to give more history.

People say that kids are pure and kind and if we could all just be like kids, the world would be a better place. That's bullshit. Tell me where the kindness is in telling an eight year old that everyone would throw a party the day I died. Or actively telling me that they wished I would die. Or forming the "I hate ThePalestRose club." Or chasing me around the playground throwing water bottles at me. Suffice to say, I wasn't well liked.

Eventually, I annoyed my way into joining a group of friends, and we spent the next nine years of school together, our own little clique. I learned to ignore those who didn't want me around them, and retreated into myself. You weren't a target if you didn't cry. So I didn't cry.

Then college rolled around. Most of our little group went to a local school all together, but I got into a good tech school that was far away. So, I went off. I met a couple of amazing people (my best friend!) there, and after the first semester I came home and hung out with my high school friends, nothing amiss. I remember we all watched Downfall on the last day of our breaks, before heading back to school. It would've been a pleasant memory if it wasn't the last one I had with any of them.

Come that first spring break, I come home expecting us to all get together, only to find out that none of them will speak to me. I remember finding out from my parents in the back of the car when we were driving home that something had happened. They knew before me, because our families had all been friends, and they wouldn't talk to them either.

And that was just the thing, it was just something. I have no idea what, but the only friends I had ever made in 12 years of mandatory schooling, some of which I had known for a majority of my life, just collectively stopped speaking to me without a word.

To say I was crushed would be an understatement. To say I was depressed would be more accurate. I contemplated the pros and cons of suicide daily. My ability to socialize with others, which had always been pretty poor, was completely shot. To this day, I really haven't ever made any new friends since this happened 5 years ago. My ability to form bonds of friendship just-- snapped.

I don't think I cried then either.

I had to know, why? Why did they abandon me? What did I do to them?? What did I do wrong??

Sleep was no respite, as I started to have persistent nightmares about the entire thing. They ranged from me begging for forgiveness for some unknown crime, to watching myself waste away in isolation forever, to teary-eyed reunions that I knew would never happen. I tried everything I could think of to stop them, but nothing ever did.

So, then you have to imagine my surprise when, two months after watching RWBY, I had an epiphany. I hadn't had a single nightmare since I watched the show. That might not sound like much, but the revelation hit me like a ton of bricks.

It was the fourth rewatch before I realized that Yang's story, especially her volume 4 story, had connected with me deeply. She had been abandoned by everyone and yet still found the strength to come out the other side whole. It was... inspiring. Which lead to my second revelation, that I looked up to these characters.

That doesn't sound like much of a revelation, but it really was to me. I don't look up to anyone. I considered myself cynical and jaded, and I really didn't have admiration for anyone. To find myself suddenly looking up to these characters-- these anime girls no less-- was shocking.

Then the volume 8 finale happened. I couldn't even listen to the ending credits song at first. I was just so shocked and numb. Eventually, my hunger for every last RWBY detail overrode my shock and I listened to it. I think that was the moment that everything really broke. I bawled my eyes out and spent most of that Saturday crying, unable to hold it all in any longer.

It was the start of a transformative process that saw me rearrange my entire identity, to truly heal from what had happened, and let me move forward. I tried to make a conscious choice to let myself be more emotionally open. I let myself feel things that I had been repressing for as long as I could remember. I changed who I was to a point where I feel like I'm entirely unrecognizable to my past self, and I love it.

I've never been happier, and I really do think that RWBY enabled me to make that transformation, and I don't think it would've been possible without it. There's still lots of problems, and my life's always going to be a work in progress. I still don't really know how to make friends, but I don't feel terrified of social rejection when I talk to strangers now.

This is just one tiny portion of all I could talk about with this show. Everywhere I turn to in it, it feels like it was written for me. Like someone understood me to an impossible degree, and wrote it with me in mind. It's crazy to think that anything like that could ever exist, much less that I've had the good fortune to watch it.

So what am I to make of all this? Well, this blog exists to try and give back just a tiny bit of what the show has given me. My fanfics are meant to be my love letter to the show. I'm looking into getting into other forms of content creation, because I just want to do as much as possible.

I don't think all of these realizations are the end for me. No, I think I'm still in the beginning of my RWBY journey. Maybe when the show ends, I'll consider that the end of the beginning. But I'm pretty confident that as long as I'm still breathing, I'll be wanting to consume and create RWBY content.

I still don't think I have a full answer for why RWBY means so much to me. Just today, driving home, I realized that it was what taught me that you have to choose happiness (or at least, choose not to be unhappy). These words are a poor expression, but they're the best I can do right now.

Maybe it's unhealthy to have so much of my identity wrapped up in this single all-encompassing idea. But as someone who felt no reason to live for so long, I'll take that risk to be able to feel the weight of these emotions for just one more day.

So that brings me to the end. Why did I post this in the first place? I guess it's an exercise in vulnerability.

I don't talk about myself, I'm convinced myself no one cares. One of my bosses at work (a really kind old man who has been way too good to me) asked me recently about what I do for fun. It was the last day he would be there before undergoing open heart surgery, which he wasn't sure he would survive.

I was extremely cagey. It was almost physically painful to say anything. My anxiety was awful. I told him I wrote stuff, and he was kind enough to say he would like to read it some time. I doubt he really would want to read RWBY fanfiction, but still.

He's still in the hospital, recovering, but in high spirits.

But the experience made me realize that vulnerability, like trust, is a risk, but it's a risk I need to take again.

#rwby #self reflection #thepalestthoughts #thank you for an amazing year #and i hope to be here again next year with another update #celebrating another year in the rwby fandom #there are a million little reasons and a million massive reasons i love this show #i could never hope to list them all but this is a little piece

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ultrahpfan5blog · 3 years

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Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Season 5 Retrospective

Finished season 5 rewatch a few days ago. Season 5 was an eventful year for the show, on and off the screen. Off screen the show got cancelled on Fox, had a huge public outcry over the cancellation which included several celebrities, and then got picked up by NBC all in 48 hours. It was an exhilarating time as a B99 fan. Lot of stuff happened on screen as well, Jake and Rosa were in prison, team got them out, Jake and Amy got engaged, Rosa came out as bisexual to the precinct and her parents, Holt was in the running to be NYPD Commissioner, Amy became a Sergeant, and then Jake and Amy got married. Eventful season to say the least. Its also my favorite season of the show.

Honestly, this season is about as close to perfection I felt with a season. In other seasons there are at least an episode or two which I felt were meh or problematic. Season 5 is near flawless. I think Return to Skyfire is the weakest of the episodes but its still pretty fun. There are several episodes of season 5 that all rank in the top 10 B99 episodes in my opinion. The show also takes some risks with a couple of experimental episodes. There are episodes with a lot of heart, there are episodes that absolutely hilarious, there are ensemble episodes, there are two hander episode. some excellent new guest stars, and many great recurring stars.

I think the two prison episodes are pretty interesting. Tim Meadows as Caleb is absolutely amazing. He is so likable and low key hilarious that the fact that he's a cannibal who eats children always feels like a dark surprise. He and Andy Samberg make for a fun duo. The first of the two episodes is particularly fun. The show doesn't hesitate to show the danger of Jake being in the prison, especially the situation he finds himself by the end of the premiere. The show does connect one story to the next pretty seamlessly with the end of the Melanie Hawkins story connecting the the Seamus Murphy story which then connected to the Holt commissioner story. There are also a couple of really good experiments in experiments and story with The Box and Show Me Going. The Box is B99 at its most confident. Apart from Gina very briefly at the beginning and Boyle very briefly at the end, the entire episode really hinges on only three characters. Jake, Holt, and Sterling K. Brown's Dr. Davidson. Its a brilliant showcase for all three actors and all three characters. I believe Brown got a Guest Actor Emmy nomination for his performance and he's brilliant as the smarmy Dentist who really is in control for majority of the episode. Braugher and Samberg were old pros with their dynamic at this point and this is fantastic Jake and Holt episode because you completely get why Jake wants so badly to prove that he's right in front of Holt why being cast as the screw up and the idiot in the interrogation frustrates him so much because we know how much Holt's approval means to him. We also see why Terry call Jake his best detective back in season 1 because of how he riles up Davidson to get the confession at the end and getting the approval of Holt that he wanted. Its an incredibly satisfying episode and one of the show's best imo. Then there is also 'Show me Going' which is a surprisingly tense episode in which nothing tense actually happens on screen. The episode does a great job working with the fact that the only knowledge the squad has is that Rosa is on the scene of an active shooter situation. Basically we are in the same situation as the characters. Since all the characters are on edge, so are we. The show does a nice job balancing humor and recognize the danger of the situation.

The season has probably my favorite B99 episode and definitely by fav B99 Halloween episode with HalloVeen. Whereas the last three Halloween episodes were predictable or spoiled from the promos, this one actually threw a genuine surprise. I knew Jake and Amy would get engaged some point in the season, but I expected it to be on the much hyped 99th episode. Instead it can much earlier with HallowVeen and its a delight from start to finish. Its great to rewatch the episode because you pick up little signs that Jake was a bit more desperate to win than usual. First when he says that planning for the heist is what got him through prison time, and then when he says to Boyle that he has to win this time and this heist is way too important. On first watch, these details just slip by as regular overzealous Jake but they have additional poignancy on repeat. The actual proposal moment is handled beautifully in a very peraltiago way where it is both funny and romantic, with Charles' reaction being the cherry on top. There are quite a few strong related episodes that follow. The Venue being a fun return with the Vulture, Two Turkeys being a TWW reunion with Smits and Whitford returning as Amy and Jake's fathers. Its a better Thanksgiving episode than the previous season Smits appearance. Bachelor/ette party is another glorious episode with wild, fun shenanigans with Reginald VelJohnson appearing as himself. Jake & Amy is a very typical wedding episode where everything goes wrong but its perfect in all the right ways. Its heartwarming and sweet. You get more examples of how Jake and Amy are perfect for each other with Jake knowing the inside and outs of how Amy stresses out, and then ending on a wonderful B99 wedding with Fred Armisen returning to make a cameo appearance as Mlep(clay)nos. The episode was designed to work as a series finale since the potential for cancellation was there and while it leaves the season on a cliffhanger about Holt's job, its the sort of cliffhanger that we could have interpreted positively if the show hadn't gotten picked up by NBC.

The 99th and 100th episode of the show were also memorable. The creators chose to acknowledge the 99th episode in a way that most shows acknowledge the 100th episode, in true 99 style. Its a full ensemble episode barring the absence of Chelsea who would return on the 100th episode. Its a typical road trip episode which kickstarts the Holt commissioner storyline. It also is the episode where Rosa comes out as Bi to Charles. This was obviously a big story for Stephanie since she is bi as well and she championed this story. It gets explored in further depth next episode, but Stephanie Beatriz gets to do some of her best work in these two episodes, showing her vulnerability without losing her toughness. Game Night honestly feels very true to not just coming out as Bi to your parents but true to any child who has to confess something that would be against their conservatives parents' values. I think Game Night is a fantastically bittersweet episode and Danny Trejo is brilliantly cast as Rosa's father. The episode positions him as the parent whose reaction Rosa is most worried about and I love how they show that while its difficult for him to grasp the concept bisexuality, he comes around to accepting it and accepting Rosa. But the episode is still bittersweet with Rosa's mom not having come to terms with it. Its also an excellent Rosa and Jake episode where we see Jake endure incredibly uncomfortable situations to help Rosa. Its a characteristic that helps make Jake so endearing that he's willing to cross all limits for his friends.

There are lots of fun and hilarious episodes in between. Craig Robinson shows up as Doug Judy in The Negotiations which is another fun ep. Kevin and Jake get a great episode dealing with their dynamic in Safe House. Rosa and Amy have some fun in White Whale as the Sleuth Sisters. Pimento returns in Gray Star Mutual for some more crazy shenanigans. Gray Star Mutual also has my favorite cold open of all time with Jake leading a suspect lineup in a rendition of 'I got it that way', totally forgetting the crime that he's got the lineup for. Its pitch perfect and I've lost count of how many times I've seen that cold open on youtube. It basically has its own fanbase and introduced so many people to B99. We also get to see Naseem Pedrad as Jake's sister Katie and the end up having a cute dynamic. David Fumero shows up in The Puzzle Master. There are also pretty funny episodes dealing with some serious subject matter such Jake dealing with his own doubts in his ability to do his job after Prison in Kicks and Holt dealing with gambling addiction in Bad Beat. All handled very sensitively.

All in all, this was a fantastic season for the show. I had a blast rewatching it and it ended the Fox era in spectacular note. A 9.5/10. Now on to season 6.

#b99 #brooklyn nine nine #brooklyn 99 #raymond holt #jake peralta #terry jeffords #amy santiago #rosa diaz #charles boyle #gina linetti #andre braugher #andy samberg #melissa fumero #terry crews #stephanie beatriz #joe lo truglio #chelsea peretti #peraltiago #sterling k brown

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